#blind faith in sunlight

[paperclipbean]

The girl was inexplicably drawn to the grizzly shadow in the corner. She shivered and turned her head away. The soft glow of the lamp was comforting and familiar. Curiosity nagged. She looked back. The shadow embraced her, claws tearing, teeth ripping. The pain mingled with an unexpected sense of relief. She looked down and saw shards of armor, invisible only moments ago, falling away and clattering to the floor. Bruises marked her body where the armor had grown too tight. The shadow gently took her hand. She looked back one last time at the false comfort of the false light. Then they walked together out into the sunlight.

#facing the unknown #leaving #don't let what once protected you hurt you #blind faith in sunlight #next steps

[otterneuvillette]

✧ HER HIGHNESS, MY DIVINE ! ✧

⋆⚡️— Pairings: jing yuan x fem! reader

⋆⚡️— Sypnosis: You are the oldest heir to the throne of the Xianzhou Luofu and as per tradition, you needed to find a spouse to rule the kingdom with, for diplomatic reasons. Jing Yuan seemed to oppose that.

⋆⚡️ — content: fem! reader, jealous jing yuan, and angst (slight Dan Feng x reader.)

⋆⚡️ — A/N: You and jing yuan had grown up together, he was assigned to you when the two of you were 17.

Also life has been very busy rn, so part two will happen but it'll take a while.

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“I will dispose of him for you,” Jing Yuan says, on his knees in front of you. His hands are rough, but so gentle as they clasp your hand.

“Your Highness, please, it is of little consequence to me. I would rot in prison if you asked me to.”

He doesn’t care that he’s been reduced to begging. He cannot stand to let you marry that man. You’re the heir of the Xianzhou Luofu, you should deserve someone better. As your knight, Jing Yuan only wants the best for you.

"There's no reason for you to do so, This is only marriage for the benefit of the kingdom, it is my duty. I will be fine, my dear knight."

Your silk-gloved hands covered his in a soothing manner.

"It will be okay." You whispered softly.

"As you wish, Your Highness,” Jing Yuan said, but he was clearly not at ease with your decision. He keeps his mouth shut and his hands at his sides.

You can't see the tension in his shoulders. He knows it’s not his place to interfere in the affairs of the empire, but he wants nothing more than to protect you from your impending marriage to the Imbibitor Lunae.

Jing Yuan would do anything for you.

You only have to ask.

"I may be blind to some things, my knight. But I'm not blind to the fact that you are concerned about this matter. Be at ease, my knight, there is no need for you to worry."

Your hand ruffled through his soft snowy hair at his kneeled position. Jing Yuan's whole being relaxes. Any tension he held within himself melts away like sunlight melting fresh snow in spring. Your touch is pure magic.

His knighthood is both an honor and his entire world. He has dedicated his life to your service... but your touch makes him forget about that for a moment. He is your best friend, first and foremost.

Your eyes crinkled as your eyebrows furrowed.

"Oh, My knight, My Jing Yuan. Please do not feel anguish, There's still a chance for you to serve another princess...maybe one of my sisters?"

Sighing softly, your gloved hands retract from his hair and rest on your lap.

Jing Yuan shakes his head firmly.

"I...I cannot serve any princess like I serve you," he tells you. "To serve anyone else would be an insult, Your Highness."

It is his duty to be a knight, you see, but it is more than that for Jing Yuan. You are his world. He cannot imagine spending the rest of his life serving another.

"I only want to serve you," he tells you softly.

"Now, don't be like that, my knight. I will not let you wallow in your sorrow because of me."

"I cannot help but feel sorrow, Your Highness," He explains. He takes a deep breath, trying to regain his composure.

"But you are right… I cannot let that get in the way of my duty to you. No matter what comes next, I will remain faithful to you."

He stands up, finally, and offers you a slight bow.

"My sword is yours to command, Your Highness."

Jing Yuan's expression is resolute.

"But, If I cannot serve you, I will serve no one," he says. "There is no other princess whose life matters to me. I am your loyal knight, and your loyal knight you will always have."

Jing Yuan will not be swayed by your wishes. He will not leave your side and serve some other princess.

You sighed, your frame shivering by the coldness of the royal hall, cold and empty.

"Stand, my knight." You whispered.

JIng Yuan stands up quickly.

"Yes, Your Highness."

He is standing at attention, ready to hear your next wish. Anything you want. He will follow all your orders, even if you wish to marry another, he will stand by your side.

It is his life's purpose. His raison d'etre.

"Please call upon my lady-in-waiting. I must prepare for dinner with Lord Dan Feng tonight."

You leaned against the armrest of the throne for support as you stood, the thick fur coat weighed heavily on your shoulders.

"And please....be on your best behavior, Jing Yuan."

"At once."

He left, and after a few moments, he returned.

Jing Yuan bowed deeply as he stepped in front of you.

"Is there anything else Your Highness requires?" He asks.

"I'll be heading to my chambers."

Your steps were light and quiet against the floor. The sleeves and the ends of your hanfu brushed against the smooth marble floor.

"Oh, and please tell the maids and chefs to get the dining hall ready for dinner at once."

You adjust the fur coat over yourself to protect your body from the cold and you let out a sigh.

You walk towards the doors of the throne room, feeling a heavy weight on your shoulder.

"It will be done, Your Highness," Jing Yuan replies. His voice is formal, but there is a clear pride and reverence in it. He serves you and is happy to be your knight.

Jing Yuan watches you as you walk down the length of the hall. Even as you leave his line of sight, your back is still straight, your steps proud, your beauty… unmatched.

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Your maid and chefs have quickly turned the dining hall into a place worthy of Lord Dan Feng.

You are seated at the head of the grand table. With Jing Yuan lingering near the door, but still close to you. Servants bustle around the room in preparation for the main course of the evening, but your head chef serves you and Lord Dan Feng a meal of various dishes of meats, vegetables, seasonal desserts, and sweet rice wine.

"Lord Dan Feng, I hope you enjoy the meal."

With elegant movements and a well-mannered way of talking, You started the conversation.

Dan Feng, known as Imbibitor Lunae was a feared emperor in his kingdom. Rumors spread across nations, for his strict and slightly unjust way of ruling.

He had sharp ears, as well as teal horns. A son of a Vidyadhara indeed. But he was beautiful, with a tall, slender figure with black hair, fair skin, and agate green eyes, enhanced by the red eyeliner that underlined them.

He was draped in a green and gold hanfu, paired the the black fur that was once from a magnificent beast that was a disturbance from his kingdom the Scalegorge Waterscape.

"Your Royal Highness, the food in your kingdom is as exquisite as I remembered."

The two of you make polite small talk as you eat your meal. Dan Feng is the first to return to the main topic.

"Your Royal Highness," he asks, as your servants fill the two of you’s glasses. "What is your impression of our latest round of negotiations with your neighboring kingdom?"

"It has been well executed. Our kingdom's affairs will be settled at a much faster and smoother pace now."

Dan Feng nods, accepting your response.

"Indeed. Our kingdom's harmony will only advance from here onwards."

Dan Feng's face becomes serious. He puts his glass down.

"It is a great honor to be invited to your table." His voice is low and measured.

"But I would be a fool to not think about what this dinner could mean for the future." He takes a sip of his wine.

"We have talked business. Now, I would like to talk of union."

Jing Yuan's grip on the sheath of his blade tightened.

"Yes, I've been wanting to talk about that."

Your frame sat straighter, as you examined Dan Feng's expression, he had a sly smirk on his lips and his vibrant eyes looking into yours.

Your rose-colored lips curled into a soft smile after you took a sip from your wine.

"A marriage between our kingdoms would secure a political alliance the likes of which has not been seen by our nation in decades."

He leans closer towards you.

"I wish to have an empress, who is as radiant and wise as you. If our kingdom joined together, the entire world will tremble."

He reaches out to your hand and takes it into his own with a gentle touch.

Jing Yuan felt his jealousy coiling around his heart like a serpent.

Dan Feng has made a direct and deliberate show of his intentions. Not only is this dinner a display of his political strengths, it is also a declaration of his intent to marry you.

Jing Yuan watches this exchange from his station by the door. He cannot hide his jealousy… or his anger.

His eyes are fixed upon you, his princess, his every sense alert to any threats that may come your way.

"I am flattered, Your Grace. Thank you for your sweet words." You were flustered, trying to keep composure.

Dan Feng leans in closer. He seems to be studying you, but it does not feel like an inspection as he looks over your face, your hair, your hands. It feels like you may be the most important, most beautiful thing in the room.

Finally, he leans closer, your breath catches in your throat.

All you can hear are the quiet whispers of the servants, the crackling of the fire....

And Jing Yuan's armor clinking as he moves.

You notice Dan Feng's gaze on you, studying your face like someone who has already decided what they wants to do. He is direct and leaves no room for uncertainty. His words are simple, yet his message is made clear: he wants you to be his wife.

"Lord Dan Feng, I believe this would be inappropriate to do before marriage." You whispered, breathing quite heavily.

It was clear that you were put off by the close distance. The smell of the sickly sweet wine and the scent that Dan Feng had, made your head spin.

"My apologies for my forwardness, Your Highness," Dan Feng replies quickly. Jing Yuan can practically feel in insincerity of Dan Feng's words as his temper boils within him.

"I meant nothing by it."

Dan Feng is a gentleman when he wants to be. He pulls away, leaving the smallest bit of space between you. He is no longer trying to make physical contact.

He has learned to control his emotions and is once again calm and collected.

"The marriage is to be arranged soon," Dan Feng adds, "It will be of benefit to our people."

You nodded.

"It will, I hope this will bring prosperity to our kingdoms."

A small smile plays across Dan Feng's lips. His eyes remain on you.

"I see what my advisors have said is true. You are beautiful and wise."

His words are like poison to Jing Yuan's ears.

"Our unions will be fruitful. Together, we will lead this world into a new age."

His words are laced with honey. His gaze never breaks from yours.

Jing Yuan's jaw clenches.

The two of you continued eating in silence, enjoying the atmosphere as the royal bards were singing a tune. A few cups of wine later, Jing Yuan could see the color spreading across your cheeks, you were never a heavy drinker.

Dan Feng was eyeing you from across the table, like a prize that he needed to grab and keep for himself. The fact that you failed to notice it made Jing Yuan even more possessive.

Dan Feng leaned closer yet again, seemingly wanting to kiss you.

Jing Yuan couldn't stand it anymore. He stood next to you, a gentle and possessive gesture.

"Your Grace," His voice is gentle yet firm, "I believe that Her Highness said that close contact is not appropriate before marriage."

He said that with a mocking tone.

His eyes are focused on the man beside you, who has taken such liberties in his conduct with you, His princess. Dan Feng seems unfazed as he meets your knight's gaze. Jing Yuan wants to strangle this man for his audacity.

"Please refrain from doing anything to Her Highness, or I will-"

"Jing Yuan."

You said in a warning tone.

"At ease."

Jing Yuan snaps to attention immediately upon hearing your voice.

"Your Highness," he bows his head deeply.

He will not let a single thought in his mind or emotion escape his body unless you, his princess allow it.

He stares daggers at Dan Feng, but his expression remains neutral…. but any outside could see the burning, lethal gaze in his eyes. Jing Yuan will not dare say a single word out of turn again.

A servant refills Dan Feng's wine.

Dan Feng drinks deeply and grins wolfishly at your knight.

"I see that you care deeply for the Princess," he says with a sneer, looking over at Jing Yuan. "Your service to her is admirable."

Your Knight stares right back, expressionless.

"I hope you do not mind me being so close." Dan Feng leans towards you again, his green eyes fixed on your face. His voice is sweet, like honey, but the threat in his words is clear.

Jing Yuan does not answer.

He is clearly upset, angry, and jealous at the sight of this man. This man, who is trying to steal you from him.

He stands by your side, unmoving, trying his best to hide his emotions… not only from you but from himself.

His loyalty will never falter, but he wants this man to go away, Jing Yuan gets the impression that Dan Feng doesn't like him either.

The glint in Dan Feng's eyes irked him.

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"It's getting late, Lord Dan Feng. Would you like for my maids to prepare a room for you?"

Dan Feng smiles, and puts his glass down.

"Why, thank you, your Highness."

He rises from the table, and bows his head.

"Please, allow me to spend one more night as a guest of the Xianzhou Luofu. I will be on my way tomorrow before dawn."

He gives you a little wink, which you notice, and so does Jing Yuan, who can only give Dan Feng a death glare.

"Then, I'll let my maids see you to it."

Dan Feng is taken away to a guest bedroom.

Your knight stands next to you, looking out the large window into the darkness.

Finally, he clears his throat.

"Your Highness." He whispers. His body language is stiff, almost as if he wants his jealousy to be noticed. It is difficult for him to contain his emotions, but he cannot allow himself to say words that may bring harm to you.

"Could we speak in private?" He says quickly.

But that made you even more agitated.

"What happened back there?!"

Jing Yuan was surprised by the tone of your voice.

"He's trying to seduce you, Your Highness."

Jing Yuan is angry, his arms crossed, his body tense.

He's not sure how to process what has happened. His mind is spinning as he tries to remain calm and professional for your sake.

"He was being…inappropriate. If it were anyone else, I would have removed them from your presence myself."

He is talking as little as he can, in calming his anger.

"That doesn't mean you have to threaten him like that! Did you forget who he is?!" You whisper-shouted.

"His Grace is a guest, Your Highness."

Jing Yuan's face is full of conflicting emotions. He is worried for you, angry at Dan Feng, but even so, he does not want to risk harm upon to you or your kingdom by acting against Dan Feng.

He is used to keeping his emotions in check. But it's almost painful for him not to go over to Dan Feng and throw him out of your palace with his own two hands.

"I cannot allow some foreign prince to touch you so freely, to gaze at you with such lust and hunger…"

Jing Yuan's voice trails off.

"And he is going to be my wedded husband by contract! Do you know the consequences if you harmed him, our nations would go to war !" You exclaimed.

"Yes, I'm aware, Your Highness."

His face is blank, but his heart is full of turmoil.

He hates having to stand by as some foreign prince takes such liberties with the woman he loves.

But he cannot betray your trust. He will not defy your orders.

The knight turns back to you, eyes darting between your face, the floor, and the windows… anything to avoid looking at your face directly.

"Your Highness," Jing Yuan's voice is tense and formal. "May I ask why you are… entertaining his advances?

You sighed, your body seemed to deflate like a balloon.

"Because I thought that maybe, it would assure me that he wouldn't back out from this agreement."

Jing Yuan's face twitches in confusion.

"Your Highness, are you saying you… do not want this marriage?"

His tone and face are utterly blank, but you can tell that he is surprised by your admission.

He clears his throat, hoping to move this subject of conversation into more acceptable terrain.

"Why would he back out of this arrangement? This marriage would benefit both kingdoms, this is simply a political decision. You have no intention of… becoming close with him?"

"The kingdoms' safety is paramount and my hands are tied politically. But you must understand that… I need this marriage to happen. I cannot let the sacrifices of my parents go in vain."

You swiftly avoided his question.

There is a deep conflict in your heart. "I have to marry him. It's the only way this kingdom would survive."

"Little finch," you feel Jing Yuan's eyes burning into you. Your knight yearns to touch you, to kiss you, to hug you. His desire becomes more and more apparent. But he knows this is not the way. He is to be your knight, your protector, nothing more.

But the way you put it so clearly. Your marriage is necessary to keep your kingdom safe. He understands the importance of your duty… but even more so than that… He wants you to be happy and he knows this marriage is the opposite of happiness.

You chuckled sadly. "You haven't called me that in years."

"Just please, Jing Yuan. You have been my best friend since we were 17. Please understand how this means so much to me and this kingdom. It's my responsibility as the oldest heir."

You've never seen Jing Yuan so… sad before.

He's always been disciplined and has never let his emotions get the better of him. But this… this is hurting him greatly.

He takes a deep breath and then looks up at you.

"I will not stand in the way of your marriage, Your Princess."

He kneels before you and puts his head down, letting his hair fall forward. His expression was steady but his voice wasn't.

"The interests of the Kingdom come before my personal affairs."

"Personal affairs? Jing Yuan, what do you mean by that?"

Jing Yuan remains focused on looking at the ground, his voice clear as he answers.

"Little finch, I have fallen in love with you," he says, the words falling from his lips as if it were no big deal, and yet, he feels it weigh upon him like the heaviest burden.

"The thought of you… marrying Dan Feng hurts me greatly. It pains me that I cannot offer you my love and honor in place of his."

There is a slight pause before he continues.

"And yet, I will not interfere."

"Jing Yuan, I— How long have you felt like this?" You stuttered.

"It started as a childish crush," Jing Yuan answers promptly, not bothering to look up from the ground.

You have never seen him show this much emotion around you before. You didn't think he knew how.

"But as time went on, these feelings… this love has only ever grown stronger. I can't put it into words, Your Highness!"

He shakes his head slightly, ashamed of his emotions.

"I will always protect you, to care for you as your best friend, and yet…my love for you is too much to ignore."

"When I saw him touch you... when he took your hand and stared at you... when he winked at you," Jing Yuan takes a deep breath.

"It made my blood boil."

"I wish I could give you everything. I wish I could give you my heart."

This statement rings in your ears louder than anything else before.

It's an admission of love and an admission of how painful it is for him not to be your lover.

"A knight has no reason to fall in love with his Princess. It is a betrayal of everything I am. But I cannot deny it," his voice drops to almost a whisper, but the sheer amount of emotion behind them carries the words far.

"My divine princess, I love you." He whispered.

Your gaze shot up to look at him as those words escaped his mouth,

"You probably will not see me as anything more than your knight, but I cannot deny my feelings. I want you to be happy, and I will continue my duty, but... I wanted to confess my love for you before you married Dan Feng."

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Love.

The words burn in your ears as more and more emotion pours out of his words

He is not ashamed of his words. He does not hide his love from your eyes. He holds nothing back and tells you the truth.

Jing Yuan, your best friend loves you. He loves you so much.

And he will never be yours.

Your mind is spinning.

Does he think he has no chance with you? Or does he already know and is merely professing his love before it is too late?

"Jing Yuan." You let out a choked sob.

"I can't-"

Jing Yuan's heart breaks as you sob. He cannot help but place a hand on your shoulder.

The movement is gentle and careful, but you can feel his hand tremble slightly. His voice is soft, gentle even.

Pleading.

"My princess, you do not have to say anything. I just wanted… I just wanted to tell you how I felt before you married Dan Feng. That is all."

He looks down at the ground.

"I will not… I cannot be anything more, I know this. But I had to tell you…"

"…you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen…the most wonderful person I have ever met," Jing Yuan whispers.

"I will cherish my time as your knight, as your best friend, until you no longer need my protection."

He bows his head deeply, looking at the floor.

"Your happiness…is my happiness. For as long as you allow my services, I will offer them gladly. Even if you marry Dan Feng and have heirs, I will still guard you," The sliver-haired man says, his voice still filled with emotion.

"Jing Yuan…." You were devastated, you couldn't process this, everything was happening so fast.

He seems to brace himself for the worst— for an outcry from you, for a scream or a slap, anything negative.

But you simply take his hand.

You take your knight's hand without a word.

"I understand…" Jing Yuan says quietly.

"It was selfish of me to tell you this when it will only hurt you, but I do not regret my words. Your happiness is my mission… your joy is my joy, and your sorrows are my sorrows."

He is utterly loyal to you, and you alone.

"You should go, I need a moment to myself." You said quietly.

He stares at you… looking into your eyes. It's impossible for him to look away.

"As you wish," he whispers, releasing your hand.

He stands, turning to walk out—but he takes a second before he leaves.

"Please know that… regardless of how this marriage pans out," Jing Yuan's voice drops to a whisper, "I will always be here for you. Whenever you need me, a whisper of my name is enough."

With this, your knight leaves, allowing you to collect your thoughts.

He just hoped that you wouldn't hate him after this.

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#jing yuan x reader #jing yuan #jing yuan angst #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail #jing yuan fluff #honkai star rail fanfic #dan feng x reader #hsr x reader #hsr angst #hsr #hsr fanfic

[guessm0del]

Little Red Riding Hood

Chapter Two: An Uninvited Guest

Summary: Living a life of caution for as long as she can remember, Y/N has never stayed too long in one place, always moving from town to town in hopes to hide her identity. With the Hunters Moon coming, she knows she must be extra careful, as the local culture resides heavily in the hunting of her kind. One night, when a cloaked figure unveils her secret and narrowly escapes, Y/N finds herself in a desperate situation: kill or be killed. With no face to go by, she must now search through the townsfolk before the stranger can spread the truth about her. But the task proves more than difficult when she realises her only lead is a long, crimson cloak.

Genre: horror, fantasy, little red riding hood retelling

Warnings: cursing, stalking, death, heavy smut (later included)

Pairing: redridinghood!Jungwon x femwolf! reader

chapter one here

chapter three here

chapter four here

Midnight air slips through the town square. The small clearing in front of the monastery lays bare, except for a small crow perched above its tallest wing, scrutinising my every move. The townspeople must be sound asleep in their warm beds. It’d be well past midnight by now, seeing as the way the moon slowly sinks across the stars. I glance to the midnight sky, cursing the way its constellations align so perfectly.

God is taunting me on this night.

He too, has seen my sin.

Perhaps he’s seen all along, and has only chosen tonight as the opportune time to tell me. Observing the empty courtyard to my left, I squint at the quiet townhouses in the distance. No red cloaks hurry through the footpaths.

The fool thinks he can hide from me.

The crow hawks a loud farewell and launches into the midnight sky. I hear it wishing me well as it passes. Smiling, I recount all the times they’ve watched on as I’ve killed the innocent. All creatures of the forest have an equal fealty to werewolves. Even birds know there are loyalties that must never be crossed.

Casting a subtle glance back to the monastery, I watch in silence as the town pastor gently closes the gates.

Shit.

Hearing him approach, I suck in an awkward breath and turn to retreat. His presence will only serve as a distraction.

He hurries forward and touches a gentle hand to my shoulder before I can turn away. “Y/N! I’ve been looking for you!”

Taking in a brief moment of freedom, I release a subtle sigh and turn to face my guest.

Pastor Mikaul has aged fairly since the last time I had seen him. His eyes droop with age, waning on the edge of exhaustion with chunks of hair that seemed to stick to his forehead like a mop.

In Mikeals mind, God was the greatest diety of all, giving sanctuary and hope to all those who send him their precious prayer.

I tilt my head to the side, observing the stern callouses that paint his palms. Some god indeed, stripping his faithful of freedom and leaving them to wander around a chapel all day like mindless fools. Blinded by their faith, High Priests in Avion spend their days locked up without a morsel of food or sunlight. They believe praying is the only thing they need to survive. I suppose it’s silly of me to judge, considering I’ve spent most of my life adapting to the shadows and living by the rules of the forest.

Pastor Mikeal makes an awkward cough as he takes his hand from my shoulder.

Cringing, I watch him shift closer, giving me a stern expression of disapproval. “The Council and I have been wondering why you haven’t been showing up to Church for our Sunday services.” He nearly whispers as he mentions the Council, pointing narrow glances to every corner of the courtyard before proceeding, “I understand your aunt is gravely ill, but perhaps praying for her good health will do better than neglecting your religious duties. You don’t want to break the Council’s trust now do you my dear?” Just as before, the old cripple goes into a hushed tone when mentioning the Council.

I suppress a smile.

Even the pastor fears them.

Under the guise of hiding a sob, I give each eye a firm pinch and wait impatiently for the tears to fall. I spend the next 10 minutes explaining my absences from church, and my dear aunts depleting health that seems to worsen each day. Waving my arms around on occasion, I weave a delicate tale of a hidden antidote, a difficult journey through the Northern treks of Rangaar, and a kind young woman trying to save her only living relative. In this story, and only in this story, I am the kind young woman. I finish my appeal with a long sob and a heartfelt apology thrown in for for his pride.

I watch through the corner of my eye as he stares uncertainly at the ground, catching the way his eyes twist in discomfort.

I’ve been a cold bitch to the him since the day Helena and I arrived in Avion. He wasn’t expecting this heartfelt reaction.

“My dear girl, if it troubles you so, let’s leave it be as it is for now…” he murmurs, briefly hesitating before giving my back a comforting pat.

I force myself into a stuttering mess. “B-but the Council will still be angry-”

“Don’t you worry about them, I’ll let the Council know of your impending troubles.” Giving me a reassuring pat on the back, he sets off in the opposite direction, leaving me to stand alone in the cold. I feel the sad expression on my face wear thin, moulding into the familiar uniformity of a nothingness.

In twelve days, when the winter solstice has begun, he will die. As will most in this town. Nothing has changed.

Our plans are still set, no matter how delayed.

I watch his figure morph into emptiness, chanting the promise once more in my mind.

They’re all going to die.

I turn to continue my hunt, finding myself pushing for any emotion, any small sign of sympathy, but all I feel is my heart sink at the knowledge that it’ll never hold more power over me than my head.

___

The South side of the forest could easily be considered the joyous reflection of the North. Complete opposites in every way.

Ever since Helena and I arrived in Avion, we’ve spent every spare hunting day covering the grounds of the North and West sides of the woods, using their confines of dark solidarity to our advantage while we hunted in secret.

The only few times I’ve needed to cross into the South was to visit Mary, who lives in a comfortable little cottage on the other side of town.

Leaves crunch beneath my feet with weary pace, leaving me to wonder if someone is actually watching me from afar or if it’s just my paranoia. I shake my head, pulling my lavender dress up to avoid a muddy branch in my path. Mary always fusses over my dresses, warning me not to get them dirty or she’ll be forced to do the one thing I hate most; make more of them. While Helena also pushes the importance of dresses as it eases the process of ‘blending in’ with the townsfolk, I’ve never been particularly fond of the discomfort a gown can bring me. Avion may be a quaint and colourful paradise in Summer and Spring, but in Winter the waters soak down through the small winded mud puddles, making it nearly impossible for any young woman to trek through the forest paths. How most Avion women bear the irritation that comes with wearing sun dresses and gowns everywhere they go, I’ll never know. Upholding the social standards of others has never been a concern of mine. Not with my situation.

I look ahead to the narrow stone path closing in, knowing I must be close. Mary usually insists I bring a map of Avion before setting off on my journey to her cottage, as the both of us know it’s not the easiest little place to find. Little does she know, I have a knack for finding people.

The crunch of leaves beneath my boots gradually soften, signalling I’m close. Mary’s cottage is situated in the centre of the most beautiful part of the forest, where the leaves in her garden shine with delicate care as though they’re watered everyday. Knowing Mary, they probably are. Small slivers of sunlight catch a small cottage coming up to my left. Hues of pink and green hover in small spaces of light above the roof. It’s almost as though Mary’s cottage is where the fairies come to congregate. That wouldn’t surprise me, honestly. I can already picture Mary welcoming them with her cinnamon cocoa and warm smile. Unlike the rest of the townsfolk, Mary has a pure heart filled with patience and compassion for the magical elements. Creatures of myth have never scared her, but that’s only because she’s never met a creature of dark magic.

She wouldn’t accept me, and as much as my affection for her stands firm, I certainly wouldn’t expect her to.

The smell of warm chocolate and pastry fills the air as I approach, pushing all thoughts of acceptance aside. Mary usually waits out the front for my arrival, fussing with my coat and boots so that I can enter comfortably, but today, she’s nowhere in sight. Making my way past the small porch steps, I take off my shoes and go to place them neatly by the door, stopping abruptly when I hear voices coming from inside. She must have a visitor. I glance to the small shoe rack by my side, searching for any shoes that mightn’t belong to Mary. I don’t see any.

Strange.

She hates it when people don’t take their shoes off before entering. Pressing my ear to the door, I listen in silence as I hear Mary’s voice accompanied by that of a males. Before I can catch what they’re saying I hear a loud crash followed by a scream.

Mary.

This was no visitor,

but rather an uninvited guest.

_____________________________________________

Authors Note:

Sheesh that took me forever haha, sorry to everyone who’s been waiting. I’m really going to try and punch out another chapter this week cause I’m getting too invested in my own story LMAO.

No fr, send help💀

Anyway hoes comment in the comment section if you want to be added to the taglist (for those that haven’t already asked)

Taglist: @ramenoil @moonmoongi

#enhypen x female reader #enhypen x reader #enhypen fanfiction #enhypen smut #heeseung smut #heeseung x reader #jungwon smut #jungwon x reader #enhypen jungwon #enhypen fluff #enhypen hard thoughts #enhypen imagines

[aziraphales-library]

Hi! Blogs like yours truly are such a blessing, every fandom should have one of these. It's so difficult to navigate large fandoms without them. I'd like to ask if you (or your followers) know of any human AU fics that make the implicit themes of religious trauma in the show explicit, where Aziraphale is in a cult or something the like? I've had a look at your crisis of faith tag and found a few, but I'm looking for more :) Thank you for your hard work!

Hello. Here are some human AUs involving cults and religious trauma for you...

Don't Ask by wyrmy (G)

Aziraphale's family always wanted him to keep secrets: secrets about their own controlling religious fanaticism. it's a hard habit to break.

Memory Lane Is Paved With Thorns by retiredseraph (T)

Aziraphale looked around. He was standing in the courtyard of his old church, which had a few trees but was mostly paved with pebble-laden concrete, which was all slightly blinding in the sunlight. People from the congregation moved around him as if it was an average Sunday after the morning sermon, going in and out of buildings, forming little groups, heading to cars, children running around. The usual. But Aziraphale didn’t feel like he had when this was the average weekly occurrence; cheerful and looking forward to changing into more comfortable clothing. Instead, it felt more like a sickly sweet poison was smothering him.

how to pay for my own life too by MostWeakHamlets (T)

"Growing up, Aziraphale knew long skirts and waist-length hair in braids." Aziraphale is raised in a religious cult that promises its members will all become angels when the rapture comes. He learns all the things a girl should know, but problems quickly begin to form when he attends school on the Outside. He starts doubting that girls his age are actually supposed to know how to deliver babies, mend clothes, and cook dinner for their 10 siblings as he's always been told. And he highly suspects that he's never been a girl in the first place.

The Drowning Men by karuvapatta (E)

Crowley was done with religion years before he met Father Aziraphale.

One and the Same Fall by ElliottRook (E)

Aziraphale Fell is a UK student attending an American Catholic school on exchange, an escape from a strict, conservative family. Anthony Crowley is a juvenile delinquent on his last chance, sent to live with his uncle and attend a school that promises to shape him up. When they cross paths at St. Bernadette's, they nearly instantly become friends, and nobody likes it--not the teachers, not the old-money students, not Aziraphale's family--but it's the best thing that's ever happened to either of them. Hanging over their heads, though, is Crowley's plan to flee the moment he comes of age, and what will happen after they're no longer trapped in the same gilded cage.

Millennial Blues by comicgeekery (E)

Aziraphale is a standard retail bookseller trying to make ends meet. One day a man named Crowley shows up with a flyer for a variety show looking for new acts. And, well, Crowley is handsome and Aziraphale has been lonely...and working on some magic tricks. What harm could a bit of light flirting do? It all should be fine as long as no one asks about his past...

- Mod D

#good omens #ineffable husbands #adult omens #religious guilt #crisis of faith #human au #mod d

[anjuyn]

It just occurred to me how much you and I don't realize how damn dreary and lonely Sakuma Rei's childhood was.

I mean, we know that, but just THINK ABOUT IT FOR A SECOND.

You're lonely. You're just damn lonely. You don't go to school because your family doesn't keep in touch with the outside world and can't stand sunlight. And besides, you also can't stay in the sun long enough to make any close acquaintances. You don't have friends your age.

But you are not alone only in a society for which you are too "vampire". You are also lonely in your family, because you are not a "vampire" enough and can feel relatively good during the day. Therefore, during the daytime you are sitting in a house in which there is absolutely no one to talk to, because even your brother, the only person of your age, is now in a semi-conscious state and you are NOT ABLE TO HELP HIM IN ANY WAY. But your family is proud of this feature and it seems to you that you are the only one who cares about it.

However, at night, when your whole family and you are awake, you are still lonely, because you are just a child in a crowd of adults who does not understand the charms of all this "vampire aesthetics" and absolutely does not tolerate the taste of blood that his family drinks on holidays. But apart from your family, you have no one to talk to, because all the other people SLEEP AT NIGHT. Therefore, you are sitting at home again and you feel that your loneliness does not stop for a second.

This all sounds terrible already, but there is something else. YOU ARE SIMPLY AN UNIMAGINABLY COMPREHENSIVELY GIFTED PERSON. You are so smart that even the adults in your family do not treat you as a child or as an equal. For them, you are something like a guiding light. You are afraid of this responsibility because you are a small child in this nightmarishly huge world, so you try to meet the expectations placed on you by working, working and working on yourself, over and over again absorbing a lot of knowledge that scares you more and more and instill in your childish heart anxiety, and it even more instill in you you have faith in your own insignificance and incompetence.

Your life is an anxiety and fear that you are NOT ENOUGH.

And when you finally get out into the real world, you, still a child, are even more convinced of that. Even for other adults, you turn into a god, omniscient and omnipotent, solving all problems. There is a growing feeling in your heart that you are responsible for the happiness of everyone in this world just because you are talented, because you are "special". And the fear of the world, the fear of responsibility, is growing and growing. And you, despite the many people who crowd around you and expect you to be "special," you're still a DAMN LONELY KID who doesn't even have friends.

And you are alone, you have no one to tell about your experiences, because if everyone around you says that you are special and should help everyone around, then that means that it really is. You believe that because you're still just a kid.

And this responsibility for the future of the family, for the well-being of your brother, for the happiness of other people, for your future, for the future of others, for the future of everyone you meet, falls on your shoulders with a heavy, huge burden and you, a scared, anxious child, implicitly carry it on yourself, because EVERYONE IS SURE THAT THAT'S HOW IT SHOULD BE.

And you don't fit into the society of ordinary or unusual people, because you are "special" to everyone. For some you are a monster, for others you are a deity, for others you are an object for blind imitation and for no one you are not "Sakuma Rei". You're growing up, more and more people are crowding around you, they're from different schools, from different places, from different countries, but you're still lonely.

It's such a disgusting, dreary nightmare, just think about it.

#ensemble stars #enstars #rei sakuma #when it formed in my head i felt PAIN #he talked about how as a child he was afraid of the world and his insignificance #and I just think that in his life there was no one who would support him and refute his fears #Everyone just kept repeating how different he was from the others #and thus reinforced his anxiety

[amazzwon]

WHAT IS... HOME?

❜ ─ ─ ❛ lee heeseung x fem! reader

╰┈➤ ❝ [angst, non-idol au, one-sided love, friends to strangers]

╰┈➤ ❝ [0.8k words]

╰┈➤ ❝ [cherry blossom; lana del rey]

I was six feet under my thoughts as waited for her by "The Stone Cold" ice cream shop. As the glass entrance opened with customers pushing through, a waft of sweet air contrasted with the evening air. The grey scarf cloaking my neck itched and tickled me; it was a cold November. My breaths turned foggy and my nose dusted crimson. 

The cold was as harsh as the reality.

It had been a week since I revealed my truth to her. 

"If my name was a word then you are the meaning to it".

That's what I had said, my true being, my pure love, my final chance to prove to her; to tell her that I, Lee Heeseung, am in love with her.

"I-If you will have me," My voice had wobbled, "Meet me in front of our favourite spot at 8 pm?". 

I cringed at the memory. Had I sounded more mature, more manly, maybe then she would have given her answer at that moment.

A week passed but my hope did not. 

The first time, it did phase me... a lot. I remember being drenched in my sorrow and overflowing eyes that would not open (I changed pillow covers twice that day).

The second time, the ice cream shop owner offered me a free scoop (that melted in my hand cause I was too in my head). 

The third time, I took interest in the pebbles by the road and kicked them woefully; but there had been times when my head played games with me, begging me to look up to meet her eyes but she wasn't even there. 

The fourth time, I gazed at the clouds.

The fifth time, my heart began playing tricks on me, persuading me to go to her apartment complex; but I was a lover, not a serial killer.

The sixth time, I can't even remember anymore...

The neon pink, "The Stone Cold", sign flickered in contrast to the golden gleaming lamp posts. It looked ugly. The contrast, I meant. Coincidentally, so did my thoughts. The crowd brushed past me, rushing as if they had somewhere to be; that thought made me jealous.

Would she consider me to be a place worth running towards?

Time was ticking; the rush hour stalled. My feet prickled; the freezing temperature swept past me. I stood still; an empty vessel with heartbroken thoughts. The ice cream shop's sign glitched shut, and then the old man (the owner) walked out offering a sad smile at the sad case of a man in front of him. I could hear the man wobbling out of the scene but, my genius envisioned her footsteps approaching me. 

There you have it, another day spent on the woman so gorgeous, she turned me ugly with glum hope. My mind tugged me to text her, just one last time. I decided against it.

The buses continued their usual routes. It was a cheap option instead I chose to take me and my pathetic heart for a walk. I shouldn't have; I could have easily saved myself from the nightmares, the embarrassment, my dignity! Yet I watched with my chapped lips parted and eyes widened. She had her arm looped with another man. My eyes flitted from her to her man. Her man? ugh, that word itself made my soul churn.

He whispered something in her ear and she laughed as if she had no care in the world. How brutal could she be! They stood near the signal waiting to cross the road... so she did have a place to rush towards but couldn't she at least stop by to reject me?

Oh no, it was worse. I was the other man... 

I collected the few shards of my heart and I turned around with heavy eyes. Walking briskly, I couldn't gaze straight, too stunned to look up anymore. At least, I had memorised the path home. I decided that home was my place to be... but no.

As soon as I thought of home, she flashed across my mind. Her smile, her warmth; she was my sunlight and she was my shade. My walking speed turned obsolete and my vision was hazy. I should have known better than to have such a tremendous amount of longing, I could have spared it to face the world.

Maybe she saw it. She noticed my blind faith, she noticed my unfortunate state of being under her spell and left me to my thoughts. They weren't any better.

I approached my home... oh god, I want to find another word to call the place I rest... 

my hand shoved in my pocket to fish out my keys

a warm place... 

I finally felt the cold metal ring and pinched the correct key.

a place to laugh...

I tried to connect it to the keyhole but I missed

a place where I could love...

 I missed again

a place... where I would stop missing her

The first tear fell before I could even enter my house; the place as cold as November. 

#a.d blahblah #enhypen #lee heeseung #enhypen heeseung #heeseung #heeseung enhypen #lee heeseung angst #lee heeseung x reader #enhypen scenarios #enhypen heeseung angst #enhypen fanfic #enhypen angst #enhypen fanfiction #heeseung fluff #heeseung smut

[amberlynnmurdock]

Blind Faith (Ch. 15)

Chapter Fifteen: Sunday

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader

Summary: You and Matt wake up on Sunday and talk about what's happened and where to go next.

Warnings: 18+ content, smut, unprotected sex.

A/N: Thank you all for being here since I started this fic in July. This has been my favorite Matt Murdock fic I've written because of the time and planning I put into it. If you've left a like, or reblog, or a comment on here, THANK YOU. It means the world to me to write fanfic and share it with people who want to read <3 Here is the final chapter of Blind Faith. I hope you like it!

Ao3 Link

Hell’s Kitchen

You stayed with Matt the whole weekend, and the whole weekend seemed to go by just as fast as it had come. One moment, you’re on your way to a date. The next, you’re blacked out and waking up in your savior’s apartment which actually turned out to be your boss’. Yeah, you could say you’ve had a long weekend. 

Your body felt fully recovered from the drug’s side effects, but it was your mind that still needed healing. Despite being saved from that terrible nightmare, you now were taking what you experienced with you everywhere. If it wasn’t you who poured a drink, you wouldn’t have it. 

Sunday. 

Bright and dry. Unlike the previous day’s weather of wet, stormy, and dark. 

And of course, the breaking news on Saturday morning. 

You didn’t want to spend more time than you needed to on him, but when you saw the breaking news flash across WHIH’s channel, your heart dropped. Zack was found by police and arrested for illegal drug possession. It occurred to you that you hadn’t seen him since the start of that dreadful night, so to see the footage of him knocked unconscious and bloody, tied to his dining room table, you froze. As soon as the image came on, Matt shut the TV off. 

Now, Sunday, you lay in Matt’s bed, with Matt beside you. Sunlight shone through his windows and onto the bed, lighting up the bottom half. You stretched under his silk blankets. 

Your legs felt sore from all the sex you had with Matt, which was going to be quite unforgettable once you’ve left. You looked around his living room through the half-opened sliding door and put it to memory: the brown, ratty leather couch. A mismatched dark blue chair. A light gray patterned rug. The brick walls. This bedroom that you’ve committed to memory of how soft his silk sheets felt on your skin just as you’ve committed to memory of the way he kissed your entire body.

You felt your heart flutter at the memory of Matt pulling you roughly against his body the night before. His hands tangled in your hair and pulled gently for his lips to find their way to your neck. Matthew, whispering in your ear that he’s wanted this for so long—he’s wanted you for so long. 

And there he was, doing it all over again. 

“Come here,” he murmurs half asleep, wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you close. 

He didn’t leave your side once this weekend, and you didn’t want him to. Mostly because you weren’t sure if you’d ever have another weekend like this. A weekend with him. Being with him in general. 

It was a question the two of you were avoiding after that first night: where do we go from here? 

You’ve certainly spent most of the time thinking of this. And you were afraid too much had happened for you and Matt to take things any further. But you haven’t said this to him…because you thought you wouldn’t be able to get the words out. 

You’re damn near close to tears even thinking of it. And you know Matt can sense them in the air. He doesn’t ask you why you’re crying. He just pulls you even closer to his chest and kisses your head. He brushes his fingers through your hair. And you want him, just one more time. Once more, before Sunday is over. 

Matt slowly drags his fingers down your back, slipping under the blanket. He traces over your ass and presses one finger on your wet pussy, a way to ask permission.

You nod your head against his chest, gripping his shoulders. 

Matt gently pushes a finger inside your velvety wetness, feeling your pussy tighten around his finger. He pushes deeper inside you, wiggling his finger to find your sweet spot. He knows he found it when you squirm in the bed and shudder against him. 

“One more time,” you whisper.

You’ve wrapped your legs around Matt’s waist and straddled him in one swift movement. The silk blanket slips off your body, exposing yourself in front of Matt again. 

Matt gasps as he feels your wetness coat his lower abdomen, not quite where he needs you most. His cock is swollen hard under the sheets, and he can hear his own heart beating hard in his chest. You lower your face and kiss him deeply, letting his tongue enter your mouth and lick your teeth. He places a hand on your neck and you place yours on top of his, encouraging him to squeeze lightly, and he does. You move the same hand over your right breast, and he feels how hard your nipple is against his palm. He moves his hand in a kneading motion.

Matt can feel and smell your wetness in the air, it makes him feel an intense need in his chest. You slowly inch your way down and rub your soft pussy over the length of his hard cock. Matt rocks against you and grabs a fistful of your hair, gently tugging. 

You reach for his cock and line it with your pussy. Bracing yourself for the pain, you slowly inch down the length of him, feeling his size stretch your tight pussy until you were completely wrapped around him. You feel full and feel a familiar tightness in the pit of your stomach. 

“Oh, God,” you whine as you feel Matt’s cock fully inside you. You begin to rock back and forth on his cock, the more you do, the more you need to feel him all around, like an itch needing a desperate scratch. Matt bucks his hips up into you, bucks his cock hard into your pussy, feeling you clench his hardness. 

“You feel like heaven,” Matt breathes out, letting you bounce on his cock fast and then slow. You slowly lift your pussy off before coming back down hard and feeling the tip of his cock touch that spot deep inside you. And you keep doing it again, and again, and again, bouncing as much as you need to feel him. 

“Mm,” you moan feeling your pussy clench tightly around Matt’s cock. You tilt your body backward and Matt reaches his hands to cover your breasts. He kneads them and bucks his hips into you, pushing his cock deeper. 

“That’s it,” Matt says in a guttural voice. 

He knows you’re about to come by the way you’re moaning and breathing so fast, so fast he almost doesn’t hear you asking him to come inside you again. 

“Matthew,” you say breathlessly as you keep bouncing on his cock. 

Matt places his hands on your waist and rocks you back and forth on his cock for you, as you’re losing pace from going too fast. You come all over his cock and moan so lightly, it causes Matt to finish at the same time, filling you with his hot come, and feeling it gush inside your pussy. He holds you still as he feels his cock pump come one, two, three, four times so deep, you shiver and fall against his chest. 

“God,” Matt moans against your ear, feeling your pussy squeeze his cock for one last drop inside you. It feels so good to come in you, to feel that tightness in the pit of your stomach, to feel Matt’s warmth fill you. It leaks out a lot, you spread your legs and feel Matt slide out of you and the familiar empty feeling of his size leaving you. You practically collapse on the bed again and watch as Matt finds a towel to clean you with. 

You’re shivering in the bed from your orgasm, and Matt takes no time in holding you against him again, as you come down from your high. 

“Was this all a good idea?” You find yourself asking breathlessly against his pillow. Matt’s next to you, pushing a strand of your hair behind your ear. 

“What?” 

“What we just did.”

“You mean, what we’ve been doing all weekend?” He smirks. You want to wipe it off, but you feel a shiver down your spine as you imagine him covered with a black mask. It was still strange that it was him. 

“Yes,” you say. You’ve come to peace with Matt being your savior, but you weren’t sure it was something you could live with. Perhaps, now was the time to ask Matt: where do we go from here?

“Doesn’t seem like it was necessarily a bad idea,” Matt says lowly, referring to your wetness. You move to lay on your back, staring at the ceiling. 

“Maybe we shouldn’t have found out what we would miss,” you simply say. 

Matt’s gaze moves to you, his brows furrowed. He reaches over to caress your chin, to guide you to look at him. 

“What do you mean?” He asks. But deep down, Matt knows exactly what you mean. 

“Tomorrow is Monday, Matthew,” you state plainly. “Tell me, do Karen and Foggy know you’re Daredevil?”

“Yes,” he answers. 

“Do they know I didn’t know?”

After a small pause, he nods. “Yes.” 

“How in the world do you expect me to walk into work tomorrow after a weekend like this? After they find out about us?”

“They won't think of you differently,” he shakes his head. “They’ll think of me differently.” 

“Matt,” you bite your lip, looking at his hazel-brown eyes. There was a time you were dying to know what his eyes looked like behind those dark red glasses. There was a time you were dying to know who he was behind that mask. “Think about what’s happened—what I’ve been through. We’ve been having this affair since the beginning of summer. We didn’t talk for a month, except at work, before I knew you were you. Friday, I was drugged and you saved me.” 

Matt clenches his jaw at the memory of Friday night. It makes him want to bring you closer to him again. But he doesn’t. 

“Then, I find out the man I’ve been seeing in secret was right under my nose all along,” you explain. “This is a lot for me. I can’t just pack it up and move on,” you reach over and gently run your fingers along his jawline, because this may be the last time you’ll ever be this close to Matt Murdock. 

“So what does that mean for us?” Matt asks, although he knows the answer inside. 

“It means, after today, that’s it. I’m going to resign from Nelson & Murdock tomorrow. I’ll write Foggy and Karen a letter and say—“

“You don’t have to do that. I’ll tell them.”

“They should hear from me,” you gently argue. 

“They will. But I will tell them everything.”

“Okay,” you sighed, “that saves me the awkward part of telling them I’ve been hooking up with you.” 

Matt smiles a little, but it quickly fades as your words echo in his ears. After today, that’s it. 

“Is it really over?” Matt asks. “After I finally reveal myself and we have this weekend, that’s it?” 

“Think about what it took for you to finally reveal yourself, Matt,” you whisper. “Look at how we ended up here.” 

As much as it pained him, it was true. What right did he have, after everything he’s put you through? 

“Okay,” he nodded. “If that’s what you want.” 

“It’s not that I want this to be the end,” you said in frustration, wishing he would understand what you were trying to say. “You’re all I’ve wanted this entire time.” You covered your face with your hands, feeling tears brimming your eyes. Why did it have to hurt so much, to make a tough decision like this? 

“I just—I don’t have the same faith I once did before,” you cry softly. “And I want you so bad. I want more weekends like this, I want to be with you, but—“ 

“Too much has happened,” Matt finishes your sentence, trying to remain composed. “I understand. You don’t have to explain yourself. It’s okay.” 

“Then why am I still crying? Why does it feel like this?” You wipe your tears away and look around his room again—your safe haven for the weekend. You didn’t want to go. 

“Because what I did to you wasn’t fair,” Matt says softly. “I ruined what could’ve been for us. I have to live with that. Not you,” Matt reaches over and places his hand on your cheek, urging you to look at him. He wipes a tear away with his thumb, caressing your cheek. “Not you.” 

⠋⠁⠊⠞⠓

After your conversation, the two of you lay in his bed for a few more hours until you decided the longer you stayed, the harder the goodbye would be. You took a shower in his apartment and changed into the clothes his nurse friend left for you. When you finally gathered your things, Matt was waiting quietly on his couch.

“Ready?” He asks. 

“You don’t have to take me home, Matt,” you said, sucking in your tears. “I think it’s best I get a cab.”

“I want to make sure you’ll be safe.”

“I will,” you promised. “Please, Matt. Don’t make this harder for me.” 

Matt nodded, running a hand through his hair. “Let me walk you to the door, then.”

You wanted to smile at his attempts, but it only hurt your heart even more. With every step to his door, you slowed down your pace. Just as you reached for the knob, Matt did too, and your hands touched for a brief moment before Matt is taking your hand and gently pushing you against his wall. 

You close your eyes and let him do what he wants, because you want this, too. He leans down and gently presses his forehead against yours, the tips of your noses touching. Matt’s strong hands are on either side of your waist, and you’re taken back to all those times he’s held you on your roof, under a black mask. His lips ghost over yours, and it takes you to gently nudge him for him to fully press his lips onto yours. 

Matt holds you still as he kisses you deeply, more deeply than he ever has before. He takes this moment to remember your scent, your heartbeat, your breathing because he’s not sure when he’ll be able to be around you again. This is all he has to remember you. This moment that having blind faith has led him to—both of you. He kisses you again and holds your face in his hands. He pulls back to kiss your jaw, to kiss behind your ear, to kiss your neck. Matt will never forgive himself for this. 

“I love you,” you whisper. “I have to go.” 

“I lied to you, that one night,” Matt says with pain in his voice. “I do love. I love you. And I don’t want you to leave. But if it means anything, it’s the most intense feeling I’ll ever have to hold on to be left by you.” 

And with one last kiss, you’re out the door, out of his apartment, out of his life for a long, long time. 

When he hears you get inside a cab, Matt charges up his phone that’s been out of battery the entire weekend and calls Foggy to tell him everything that’s happened. 

TAGS: @starry-night-20 @sumsytee @queerqueenlynnn  @mattmurdocksstarlight @marvelcinematiquniverse @hailey-murdock @yeonalie (please let me know if I missed you!)

P.S. There will be an epilogue!

#matt murdock #daredevil #charlie cox #marvel #matt murdock x reader #blind faith #matthew murdock #daredevil born again #daredevil: born again #charlie cox x reader #the defenders #foggy nelson #karen page #matt murdock imagine #matt murdock fan fic #matt murdock x you

[iwriteloveletters]

Bring Me to Life (Yan!Eren Yeager x Reader)

Hello its me again! This is my first ever x reader fic and I had a lot of fun writing this, I hope if you stumble across this you'll enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Warnings - None

Spoilers - NOT SPOILER FREE

Description - After Eren loses you, the love of his life, and then his own life. He goes back in time to a simpler time of the world including his own; where you're alive. He now decides he has to do whatever he needs to in order to save you.

Words - 3.5K

╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗

Chapter One - Reunion

“I’ll see you later, Eren.” Was the last thing he heard before darkness flooded his vision. He heard sobs and screams echo amidst the darkness he saw. Still feeling the warmth of Mikasa's arms around his head. 

He finally did it, he would think to himself. He started the rumbling and wiped out 80% of humanity, all at the cost of his own life in return for his friends' lives. But what about you? What happened to you? 

You were killed during the attack on Marley, he saw it coming of course and didn’t do anything to stop it but it affected him more than expected. You were someone he admired, loved, and cherished. Of course it was going to affect him, but why didn’t he stop it? He had faith that you were gonna change your own future, you were going to survive and you were going to be seen as a hero just like the others; but instead you became a part of the statistic of soldiers that didn’t make it back home alive. You and Sasha never made it back home, neither did Hange. He thought the way a nineteen year old hopelessly in love would. 

It was still dark but he was still conscious. He was supposed to be dead. Why is he still in the dark? He was expecting to be in Hell for his sins and crimes against humanity. All he knew was that this wasn’t the Paths, Purgatory, or Heaven. This was something entirely different. 

The echoed screams and sobs abruptly stopped while he was questioning where he was, he heard a voice – it was Mikasa’s. 

“Eren… Eren…” He heard her speak, her voice was higher pitched. She was younger. 

He opened his eyes to the sight of her, the sunlight blinding him on top of that. 

“Why were you crying?” She asked the now younger Eren, he touched his face and felt his wet cheek. 

He looked down at his hands and it confirmed his thoughts, he was young again! Does that mean you were here too? He had to find out. 

Mikasa waved her hands in front of his eyes, “Hello… Why were you crying? Are you okay?” 

He came back to his new reality, once again lost in his thoughts, “I had a weird dream that’s all.” He said, excited to see all his friends again. 

“About what?” 

“I forgot.” 

She helped him up from his spot under the tree and said that he needed to continue gathering wood for his mother. He felt a wave of emotion hit him. 

His mom was back, his mom was back and she wasn't a Martyr for a nine year long goal. Not yet, did he have to witness it all again. He has to find everyone and everything he lost. 

He nodded and followed Mikasa along. It was quiet, he used to hate silent walks but after everything that happened he can appreciate something as trivial as a silent walk for once in his life. 

They bumped into Armin on the way home, saving him from the bullies he had, which he also appreciates. He gets to feel like the hero again even if the real hero was Mikasa, like always. 

They all talked and shared laughs afterwards, Armin thanking them for their help and Mikasa and Eren saying it was no big deal; they were friends of course. 

They were friends again. Eren’s heart was feeling full once again. 

“Have you seen (Y/N)?” Eren blurted out, if everyone was fine and if this was his very real past, you were there too. You had to be there. 

“Hmm…” Armin hummed, “I passed them while they were on the way to the market with their mom. Maybe they’re still there?”

“Wanna go meet up with them?” Mikasa adds. 

Eren nodded as fast as he could, he wanted to see you more than anything, those four years away from you hurt more than anything. All the letters he wrote but couldn’t send out because he had a goal to focus on. How hurt you must have been to not be able to hear from him and die the same night you were supposed to reunite. How hurt he was to hear of your demise.

He remembers that night so clearly, he was only able to get a glimpse of you before overhearing from Connie and Armin that you were shot in the face right in front of Connie’s eyes after the mission was a half success. The ride home was Hell, that was his punishment.

He decided right in that alley that he would not let this happen again, he would stray from his intended path the way he thought you were going to. He would save and protect you from the cruelty of humanity.

“He seems so spaced out.” Armin said to Mikasa.

“I know, he’s been like this since I woke him up. Maybe he’s still tired.”

“I can hear you guys.” 

“Well, we have been waiting for you so we can meet up with (Y/N)!” Armin tugged on his sleeve.

“Right, right. Let’s go, who knows how long they’ll be there for.”  

Armin nodded and let Eren lead the way, he was so eager to reach you and see you once again for what felt like years. A moment away from you felt like he was back in the Paths, you could only imagine what the time after your death and Eren’s stay in Marley felt like. 

“So Eren, have you been alright?” Armin questioned him, Eren has been silent this entire time and only speaks a minimum of 10 words every few minutes. Eren has never been the silent type. The young boy always had an opinion or a comment to make, he never held back so it was odd to see him like this.

“Yes.” He replied without a second thought. 

But was he really fine? He was rightfully killed and suddenly he's ten years old meeting up with someone long gone. Someone innocent, someone who should have never been a soldier. 

“Uhuh.” Mikasa muttered. 

“Why wouldn’t I be fine?!” Eren raised his voice, there was the Eren they knew. The loud Eren, the Eren who didn’t care about who could hear him. 

“Because this is the only time you raised your voice at us or anyone in general.” Armin chuckled. 

“Well maybe my throat hurts and I didn’t wanna yell.” He whined. 

The pair rolled their eyes in response to that, letting him slide with it today because clearly something more was up but they just couldn’t tell what. Mikasa was gonna be sure to interrogate him so she and Armin can know later on .

“(Y/N)!” Armin shouted and rushed towards you, Mikasa following. They were so happy to see you, it may have only been a few days but you were a very good friend of the trio; they were always gonna be happy to see you. You were like a missing piece to the puzzle, you got along with all three of them so well. It made your parents so delighted considering you didn’t have many friends before them. Eren met you on the right day at the right time and now you have three amazing friends.

There stood Eren, watching you. You were alive, he couldn’t believe it. He wanted to cry right in front of you three but he didn’t allow himself. It almost felt like a reunion, the reunion he wanted when he came back from Marley but wasn’t allowed to have. Instead he was met with both your demise and his. 

“Eren?” Your voice snapped him back into reality, he really has to stop spacing out and processing everything in real time before you all make him see his dad about issues he can’t yet comprehend. 

“Hm?” He hummed. 

You let out a laugh at the sight of him trying to be aloof knowing he was far from it, “You look like you’ve seen a ghost and Mikasa and Armin agree you’ve been acting strange.”

He might as well have seen a ghost when he saw you, your cheeks flushed from walking around the long market for so long, your hair a slight mess from the wind, and your breathing were all indicators that you were alive and well. He still couldn’t have believed that he was staring and you and you were staring back at him. 

He pulls you in for a hug, exhaling a large amount of air past your shoulder as though he were holding his breath, he was gonna cry he felt it. The painful lump in his throat stuck in place, preventing his ability to talk. 

More memories came in, hitting him like a train. The grave, you never made it back home to receive the burial you wanted if you ever succumbed to the titans – but you succumbed to humanity instead, and the fact he never got to give you the life he promised you; even if you didn’t know it and it was impossible in the first place. 

Before everything fell apart in the first life he took a moment alone to visit your grave site, adorned with flowers and your name engraved in it, but unfortunately there was nothing under it, it felt like he wasn’t seeing you and just a decorated rock. And that broke his heart, yet he didn’t allow himself to cry. The same way he’s not letting himself cry right now.

“Are you okay… when have you ever hugged anyone?” You asked, starting to worry about your friend. 

Armin and Mikasa were watching in the background, they were confused. They knew him for a while now and never saw him really hug a friend that way, he hugged them of course but he hugged you like you were going to move out of Shiganshina and never visit or write to them ever again. It was odd and they desperately needed to find out what it is that's wrong with you. 

He suddenly realized what he did and backed off, he wasn’t nineteen anymore. He was ten again and he needed to start from the ground up. Nobody knew what he did in the future or what happened to everyone; however, this may be his second chance. He may not be able to prevent some of the terrible things from happening. Your death. 

“Ummm… wow I don’t know what to say Eren.” You laughed nervously, having never received such a close hug from somebody. But there’s a first time for everything, you would think to yourself. 

“Don’t say anything.” Eren said while he stared right into your eyes. He felt so embarrassed it almost – no it did piss him off, how could he just show so much vulnerability in public like that, the future is already in terrible hands. Once again. 

“Are you sick Eren you’re acting really strange today.” Mikasa said while she was beginning to press her hand on his forehead.

He swats her hand away, “I’m fine, you guys keep asking me and I’m fine! You know what, I’m going home!” He stomped in the opposite direction to you guys. 

Mikasa sighs and follows, “Wait up Eren.” 

You and Armin wave goodbyes and go the separate ways as well. 

“Mikasa, Eren! Wait!” You caught up to them, “I know you don’t wanna hear this Eren but please see if your dad can figure out what’s going on with you, you’re worrying us.”

That made his heart skip beats, that made his heart flutter, for a moment he thought it stopped completely and he was going to die again. 

Not only were you alive but you cared about his well being, he never saw the little things you did or said until it was too late but he saw it now. The way your eyes light up at the sight of your friends, the way you hugged him even though his hug was out of the ordinary, and the way you were still worried about his well being even though he’s acting like a brat right now. He will cherish you so much more than he did before, he was given a second chance for a reason, he’s gonna do this the right way.

He’s gonna protect you no matter what, nothing will stop him. He promises you that, with once again not telling you. It’s his little secret. 

He hears Mikasa sigh, “(Y/N)’s right… we really should tell your dad. You could have a fever and it's getting to you, you’ve been acting really strange today. That only happens when you’re sick.”

“I’m fine.” He grumbled, he was fine. It’s not like he didn’t die an hour ago but he’s fine. It’s not like he didn’t lose the love of his life last month and was away from them before that, it’s not like he has heavier burdens in this life due to his knowledge of the future. But he’s fine, he convinces himself. 

“You don’t seem fine.”

“Mikasa, can you just drop it.” 

“Fine.” She looks down on the ground, making sure she doesn’t trip on anything. 

Maybe he should tell his dad but is that even an option? His father can see the future but could he foresee this happening? He didn't even kill the Reiss family yet, he must not know what's going on. He wouldn’t know what to do but Eren wants someone to know, it’s actually a lot more stressful this time around to be so aware of the future than he last remembered. Being in charge of changing your fate is even more stressful for ten year old Eren, he was determined to find a way for your sake. 

“I wonder what that dream was about.” Mikasa said as an attempt to kill the silence. 

“It was sad that’s all that I remember.” Eren said looking straight ahead, he was actually excited to head home. He hasn’t seen the inside of his own home since… forever! He doesn’t remember much of the inside of his home but he was excited to refresh his fuzzy memories of the cozy place. He wonders what his mom made too. 

With enough thinking and nervous thinking about what he was gonna say to his mother or how to prevent a reaction, they made it to his beloved home in no time. 

It looked so warm, he thought. He was finally gonna see his mother, he was gonna see the woman he killed to achieve a goal. He was feeling a bunch of emotions, guilt, hurt, grief, and anger were some of the emotions he experienced.  

The closer he got to the house the more he got nervous. He was ready, he had to convince himself. 

The pair walked into the sight of Grisha packing up for his work trip and Carla preparing tonight's dinner that consisted of potatoes, carrots, and celery. 

“Oh hello Eren, hello Mikasa.” Carla smiled.

Eren’s stomach dropped upon seeing her, she had all the characteristics needed to show that she was alive and well. He couldn’t believe it, he couldn’t hold back his tears. He wanted his mama more than anything right now. The future was scary, the life he led is even scarier, right now he needed the warmth of his mother more than anything. He was only ten after all. 

Eren collapses on the ground, tears flowing down his face. He couldn’t take it, seeing two– no three dead people in a day shocked him more than anything, his currently fragile heart couldn’t handle it. He believes he can stop your death but his moms? He doesn’t think he’s capable of stopping; the rumbling still needed to happen after all. This fact alone sent him further into tears. 

“Eren!?” Carla shouted as she ran towards him, Grisha following her as well.

No one has ever seen him like this, Carla is now worried sick about her sobbing boy’s well being too. 

“I’m sorry…” he wailed, “I’m so sorry mom.” Continuing to sob. 

When she first died was when he knew little to nothing about the situation he was about to find himself in so he was full of anger and never getting the chance to process it, he was too busy trying to fight for humanity and against it, there was no ounce of sadness in his heart for his mom the first time around. But now knowing she will die in a few days from now was the final thing to break him. He finally had room in his heart to grieve and his body was too small to know what to do with it. 

Carla pulled her close to him, causing him to sob even more. He hasn’t been hugged in years by his mother, he practically forgot the feeling. It all felt scarily new to him to feel his mothers warmth once again. 

Eren didn’t know how to explain himself so he continued to cry and shake his head ‘no’. Mikasa gathered a dry rag and some water for him to drink. Grisha standing there wondering what to do, no amount of medical school could prepare him for this. For fatherhood. He also knew what his own son was capable of doing, this current outburst took him by such surprise. 

“He’s been like this since he woke up from his nap,” Mikasa mentioned, “He almost started crying when he saw (Y/N).” Mikasa knew him like the back of her hand, while you may not have seen the tears and only noticed the silence, she knew it all. 

“How about you take another nap, love?” She said as she caressed the back of his head.

“No!!” He shook his head, he didn’t wanna step away from her again, he wanted to spend the last few days of life with her. He didn’t want to see her go, not when he just saw her again after all this time.

“You need to rest Eren, please listen to your mother.” Grisha butts in, “You need rest, you’re overwhelmed.”

“No no no!” He cried out again, he needs to stay here with her. He needs to be there for her remaining days. 

He began to cling onto Carla even more, his tiny arms around her neck and his overheating face buried into her shoulder. 

“Eren!” Carla shouted, there wasn’t anger in her voice however; she simply needed to get his attention somehow. 

He stopped screaming and crying to hear what she has to say, he may not have listened in his past life but he will now. This one time. 

“Eren… you need to rest, I will stay with you for a little bit but then I’d have to go because I have to make dinner. Would you like to have Mikasa stay with you afterwards?” She caressed the back of his head, as an attempt to remind her son he wasn’t in any danger, that he was safe and sound. 

“Okay.” He pouted, slightly embarrassed that he had an outburst like this. This was never like him but he couldn’t help himself. The grief was too much on his ten year old heart. 

“Perfect, Grisha my dear, do you think you could give Eren a quick check up to make sure he’s alright?” 

Grisha hummed and nodded his head, taking his equipment and heading to Erens room. 

.

“C’mon, let's get you checked out,” Carla pinched his cheeks and flashed him a smile, he wanted to cry again, he felt so whole and full of love, he wishes he could stay this way forever. Maybe Heaven was this, maybe Heaven was being a little boy again and seeing your friends and your precious mama. No titans, no war, this was true peace. 

“Okay…” He said as he let go of Carla, getting ready to follow her to his room. 

“And when I’m done, Mikasa and I can spend some time together while we prepare dinner!” She cheered. 

“Alright!” Mikasa smiled, she enjoyed spending time with Carla. After the loss of her parents, Carla and Grisha were the closest thing she had to parental figures. 

They finally made it to his room and he walked over to his bed with Carla following him and tucking him in, Grisha began to check his temperature. 

“Well… he’s not warm.” He stated, in other words: he’s perfectly fine and didn’t need medical attention.

“Better safe than sorry.” Carla said, kissing Eren on the forehead just to provide extra comfort and care. 

“Well I have to start heading out now so–” Eren cut him off. 

“Dad, I need to talk to you.” He said.

 Eren finally deciding to tell his father half of the truth. 

“Oh?” Grisha turned around.

Carla took that as her cue to leave, whatever it may be must be strictly between men she thought to herself.

He waited until Carla closed the door shut so he can surely speak with no listening ears or prying eyes around. 

“Well, she’s not here. What was it you wanted to talk about?” Grisha said, he chuckled to himself thinking about what it could be. Many possibilities were there, girls, Mikasa, you. Maybe he had a crush on one of you. 

Eren took a breath in for courage, he was already preparing himself to be told he was crazy. He was surely crazy but he was right. He knows what he saw and did. 

“Can you see the future?” He asked. 

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#attack on titan #eren x reader #eren yeager #yandere #yandere eren x reader #tw yandere

[railroad-migraine]

Oooo could you also do a M9 version of the post-intense battle kiss?

Yes. Yes I can. Prepare yourselves for many, many kisses.

I've now written this scenario three times - it's been so much fun, thank you guys for the support <3 Ughh it gives me such a gooey feeling, this 💕 This is also my longest set of headcanons (8 characters involved) and was a labour of love. I hope you enjoy and please do reblog, it's much appreciated xx

~ Poet

Bell's Hells version ✨ Crown Keepers version

After-Battle Surprise Smooch ft. Kingsley and Essek

Beau 💜

She's panting as if the ambush the party just experienced was nothing more than a heavy workout, and she's attempting to brush away the stray flyaways of hair that cling to her forehead. There's a slight flush to Beau's cheeks, her heartbeat is racing - and yours is too. You swallow heavily and step into her space, and tug on her robes to gain her attention. She offers a scratchy "Yeah?" before you take a leap of faith and make a move.

The moment your mouth connects with hers, she turns as stiff as a board for a hot second. All lean muscle and calloused edges, the softness of your gesture has her tensing up while her brain buffers in a post-fight haze. You sigh through your nose, hand cupping her cheek as you lean back and grin and she blinks at you owlishly before returning it easily.

She ducks forward, her hands skirting the edges of your coat back to tuck her fingertips under the hem of your shirt, attempting to steal some of your warmth for herself. It's grounding. She kisses your temple, breathes against your cheek as her eyes slide shut. She allows herself a laugh when you suggest she pay more attention to your lips.

-

Caleb 💜

The wizard is propped up against a pillar of the temple the Nein had come across, and in the distance he can still hear (and smell) the sizzling remains of the evil cult members he had to take down with a fire spell minutes prior. He sniffs and wipes the dribble of blood from his nose with the back of his palm as you settle down on the ground at his side. It's gotten easier, facing the aftermath of fights ever since you came into his life. Your joints ache and your heart still is thumping in your chest, body still on high alert even though it's all over. He looks at you, concern in his blue eyes, and Caleb must also share the anticipation, meeting you in the middle for a kiss.

You pinch his chin between your fingers and tilt his head to the side, and then they slide into his hair just as his body completely melts into you. It's not a frantic kiss, not rushed nor explosive. But it is practiced and passionate, languid and drawn out as he follows your lead.

The man has the audacity to whimper into your mouth when your fingers tease and tangle themselves into the hair at the nape of his neck. You would have happily sat there kissing your wizard instead of taking a well earned long rest, but eventually he winces and draws back. You're both still in recovery mode, still injured and weak - you both know this. He gives you a small smile and kisses your cheek, mumbles something soft against your skin.

-

Fjord 💜

The party barely manages to escape the crumbling ruin after defeating the necromancer, and the sunlight is blinding when you reach the surface. Shaken, you quickly wrap your arms around Fjord's middle, seeking some sort of familiarity after all you had faced together. He freezes. You can't help but feel a little rejected and embarrassed when the kiss is cut short as he places a gentle but firm hand on your chest and leans back.

He's panting, remnants of the fear he experienced nearly dying at your side in the battle lingering still. He settles for holding your hand in his, pressing your knuckles to his lips with his eyes tightly shut. It's not your fault that the situation was a bit overwhelming. Being swept up in theatrics after encountering malevolent spirits had Fjord in a slight panic when you moved to kiss him. But it's okay now. You're both safe.

When his heart has a moment to slow and his eyes start to focus, you quickly become the most important thing in his vision. As quick as he's pushed you away, his hand moves to cradle the back of your head and he's pouring every ounce of himself into a proper kiss. He's so warm, his frame completely shielding you from the rest of the world. He mutters an apology into the miniscule gap between your faces, immediately closing the distance after for another.

-

Jester 💜

You're shaken out of your battle rage by an incredibly exaggerated and disgusted retch from behind you. You turn only to find Jester standing behind you with a scowl, lifting one leg to closely examine her boot. To her dismay, it's completely covered in giant spider remains. She wrinkles her nose at the sight, more annoyed than angry, grumbling about how she wouldn't have worn her new shoes if she'd known the party would be fighting giant spiders while out exploring.

With the way your blood is still fiery in your veins, and your dear tiefling's face is sulking endearingly, how can you not sweep her off her feet? You soften her mood immediately with a kiss. She goes up on her tippy toes, leaning into you enough that she's barely even making contact with the ground. Laughs into your mouth, and you can feel the upturn of her lips against your own.

She pulls away, tenderly reaches out to wipe at the shine of your mouth that she left behind. With a waggle of her eyebrows, she beams at you, says something clumsy and crude that makes you laugh. Squeals if you happen to lift her, spin just a little to ease the after-battle tensions, and she holds onto your shoulders with a vice grip - as if you'd ever drop her. She knows you love her too, especially considering she's covered in spider bits.

-

Molly 💜

The tiefling has the biggest toothy grin when you find him after the fight, his smile slightly faltering at the edges when he sees your stormy expression and stomp in your step as you get closer. Mollymauk is nursing a cut made on his arm from earlier, one of his own to ignite his bloodhunter powers, but it's also one that also nearly cost him his life. He's so incredibly careless sometimes, but you know it's because he cares so much - about his second chance at life, about the party, about you. He prepares himself to be scolded by you but is pleasantly surprised when you cup his face so delicately and give him the softest look, brushing your lips against his.

The best way to describe the kiss is that he takes his time, as if he desires to taste and savour you while he still has you. He is so gentle, almost lazy with the motion of it, even though it's after such an intense fight. His nose bumps yours briefly, and he's practically purring by the time one of your hands weaves itself into his hair.

But he's selfish, greedy too, and though your lungs cry out for oxygen you can't bring yourself to leave him wanting. A cheeky hand trails down your waist, past your hip until he can get a handful of your outer thigh. He gives a playful but comforting squeeze, a little and innocent thing compared to the way he's ravishing your mouth.

-

Yasha 💜

"Are you okay? Are you hurt?" Her worried voice over the dissolving battle carries a tenderness that greatly contrasts the heavy sword she carries. You quickly clamber over debris when you spot her, a deeply emotional urge to just be close to your barbarian that began as kindling is now a roaring need. Your foot catches on the edge of an abandoned cart and gravity suddenly pulls you down.

Yasha reaches you and, having dropped her weapon, swoops just in time to keep you upright and unharmed. She's your constant balance, what keeps you grounded. By pure instincts alone, you thank her by crashing your mouth into hers. Your arms wind around her neck and your body is buzzing all over, electricity flitting along your skin and through your veins. Her eyelashes kiss in the corners of her eyes when she closes them, strong hands lovingly caress along your shoulder blades. Your mind, love-addled, barely registers the way her thumbs stroke back and forth there.

She lifts you a little bit, just enough that she supports your weight and your tippy toes are grazing the earth. She makes a noise in the back of her throat and breaks the kiss, her hair a little bit frazzled. "Well... that answers that. Heh."

-

BONUS: Kingsley 💜

It's pouring rain, storm clouds have engulfed the sky. You stand, soaked to the bone with your overcoat torn to shreds, over one of the many (now deceased) sea monsters that managed to scramble onboard the ship and attack you all. A victorious cry comes from the helm, and Kingsley victoriously lifts his sword high above his head as the crew cheer. He sees you amongst the fray and charges straight to you, about to assess you for wounds but it's hard for words to form when your mouth captures his.

So fucking eager. He wants to wrap himself around you, surround you, instinctively curling an arm around your back to keep you anchored to him. He's still so new to the world, new in general, but this - you - are so easy for him to adapt to. The kiss itself does not last as long as you would want, but he makes up for it with hasty and almost desperate smaller kisses to your cheek and jawline. It feels as though he's trying to imprint these fleeting touches into your skin, moulding into you, little memories of a moment of calm after the storm.

Kingsley holds you close to his body after that, cradling you into him while his eyes dart around the scene of battle with his chin perched on your shoulder protectively. His hair is matted and sopping wet and tickles your face, the buttons of his coat scrape harshly against your thin shirt, and you catch a glimpse of some of the crew averting their eyes - but you couldn't care less. Kingsley is living and breathing and here and yours.

-

BONUS: Essek 💜

This poor man. He's still getting used to the intensity of physical fights rather than diplomatic ones. His feet hit the ground and he stumbles to balance himself before you hold him by the elbow to steady him. His smile is wobbly, cocky but wobbles slightly as he thanks you. His white hair stands in all sorts of angles and there's a small cut above his brow, and you know it seems impossible but it post-battle Essek just does something to you and he has no time to react when you grip his collar and tug him towards you.

You quickly find he's just as desperate as yourself. His hands find your waist and smooth towards your back, fingertips pressed into the skin there and accidentally treading upon and brushing against bruises in the process of forming. You wince and he breaks the kiss, immediately concerned and hesitant, his touch turning gentle when he settles his hold on your hips instead.

You assure him you're okay, but he's not having it. He decides to go slow now, peppering small, lingering kisses to your face before he steps back and adjusts how his robes sit upon his shoulders. He looks cool and composed, and you want to hate him for it when you yourself feel so disheveled. Don't worry though - you'll get even with him later.

#critical role #critical role x reader #critical role fanfic #critical role fanfiction #critical role imagines #critical role imagine #critical role headcanon #critical role headcanons #beauregard lionett x reader #beauregard lionett #caleb widogast x reader #caleb widogast #fjord stone x reader #fjord stone #jester lavorre x reader #jester lavorre #mollymauk tealeaf x reader #mollymauk tealeaf #yasha nydoorin x reader #yasha nydoorin #essek thelyss x reader #essek thelyss #long may he reign #mighty nein #the mighty nein #mighty nein x reader #the mighty nein x reader #campaign 2 #kingsley tealeaf x reader #kingsley tealeaf

[defilerwyrm]

The Future of Sunlight Sensitivity

Okay so here’s something to chew on. I’ve heard through the grapevine that the next big update to D&D is going to have another monumental change to the drow: if what I’ve heard is true, not only will they continue to be a largely non-evil race outside the Cult of Lolth…their sunlight sensitivity is going away.

This may or may not be true, but let’s imagine that in an Exandrian context for a moment.

The Kryn have one of their holy days where they draw back the veil over Rosohna and bathe in the burning, blinding light of the sun. The appointed time comes. They blink and squint, wincing in anticipation, putting on brave faces for their faith, and the light comes, and it stings at first, but then…

They can see. They can see.

Someone cries out, astonished, “It doesn’t hurt! Open your eyes, it doesn’t hurt!”

The Kryn collectively sob. This is surely the greatest blessing the Luxon has imparted on them since leading them out of the Underdark. Their faith has been rewarded. They can walk in the light of day and not do so blind.

(All the other races in Rosohna are fucking flabbergasted. The non-drow believers join in the wonderment at this blessing. Here and there, a few wonder what blessing the Luxon might give their people next, and—though no one would dare breathe a word of it—some are envious, wondering why it wasn’t them. Were they not faithful, too?)

The Bright Queen issues a decree that the veil of night will be slowly phased out. They start with an hour at dawn. Slowly, slowly, over time—because, even though they’re not blind in sunlight anymore, the drow are still not used to it, nor is almost anyone else in Rosohna, and they have crops to think about—the darkness over Rosohna recedes, until a year or five down the line they have day and night like any other place.

(Many farmers are very happy about this. Many others, whose produce is no longer in hot demand and who haven’t been able to pivot to sunlight crops, are not.)

Meanwhile, hundreds of miles away in the tall-fenced back yard of a Rexxentrum cottage, a drow comes out of trance late with his husband wrapped around him. He realizes in a panic that it’s past dawn. He scrambles for his dark-lensed glasses—his parasol—anything—but…it doesn’t hurt. It’s an hour past sun-up and the light doesn’t hurt. He can see. He stares around, trying to make sense of the explosion of colors he’s never really seen before. Tears fall from his wide, wide, unhurting eyes.

“Caleb,” he says, shaking his husband urgently. “Caleb wake up.”

Caleb mrrphs and snorts awake, blinking, bleary. “What’s wrong?” he asks muzzily, and then he too, goes wide-eyed. “Scheiße, it’s seven in the morning, we need to get you inside—”

“It doesn’t hurt,” Essek says, stunned, unknowingly echoing his kinsmen.

“What?”

“It doesn’t hurt,” he says again, and turns his tear-glittered eyes on Caleb now. Dear gods. The morning light shines bright on the copper and platinum of his hair and lights up his summer-day eyes. He’s beautiful. To think, all this time, Essek never knew how beautiful this man could be in the light. “Caleb. I can see.”

Caleb sits up. Confusion, realization, and concern all vie for dominance on his face. “What does it mean?”

And Essek, who’s never had faith a day in his life for anything but his own prowess, the Mighty Nein, and one Caleb Widogast, wonders. He wonders things that are blasphemous to his own heresy. But what he says is, “I don’t know.”

#shout out to everyone who immediately thought of batty koda yelling “i can SEE it’s aMIRACLE” #dungeons and dragons #critical role #shadowgast #drow #critical role fanfic #essek thelyss #caleb widogast #cr c2 #before long my song is dying #plz how do i fandom

[from-izzy]

things/aesthetic you associate with your moots please!

anon! this is such a fun ask! thank you so much for this one!! 😍

i'm doing the ones i've talked to enough (dm and/or on gcs) for me to (somewhat) answer this ask (sorry if i missed you or gave you something that doesn't suit you 😭) also limiting to fifteen (15) things or else we'll probably be here all day oop---

my obsession with alphabetical order strikes once again!!

honestly this became more of an appreciation post but 🥺

@astrae4

my child, cute round glasses, colourful heart shaped balloons and parties, 'i just go with the flow', energiser, miffy, light blue jeans, photobooths, wanderlust, 'paris! it's no longer just europe now', ice skating, falling gracefully despite being sick and swamped into 'sewer water' 😭, bakeries, caffeine in the form of daily matcha, doesn't like me as much as i thought she did

@cloverdaisies

black and white (with a splash of red), dynamic hair colour changes, black sleeveless satin dress, but also oversized monochromic shirts, a glass of wine one on hand, blurred pictures, mirror selfies with flash on, eyeliner wings, but also fruity and lovely, same age but so mature, 'guys it's due today and i haven't started', 'i knew you would come back with time' (🥺), juvenile, no emojis at all, sarcasm (not) detected most of the time (i'm gullible ok 😭)

@cupidjyu

my hyunjae bestie!!, bows and croquette, pink and white, picnic with flowers, toro inoue, spring breeze, texting and chatting during school times, 'i'm bored' (talking about class), thirteen-hour time zone difference (and my body clock makes it worse), 'sunwoo is cute!', but also 'hyunjae!', but also sleep >>> anything (including hyunjae 🙄), sexy brain (please gimme those braincells), going around in circles, 'why do you do this to yourself? sleep!'

@heemingyu

honey bee, distorted purple and white aesthetic, gilmore girls, late deep night talks, love and patience, three-leaf clover (shamrocks), the grinch filter, being a huge menace to society but still lovable so it's hard to really tell her off, in reality i love her more than she loves me, but i still give her silent treatment anyways, 'naur', economics and crying, missing the bus and then blaming it on me, black cat, izz instead of izzy 🥺

@justalildumpling

chaotic sibling energy, my no.1 bitch, casual night time walks, fearless, freedom, making videos during said walks, lovesick puppy, ohmyface by silichmasha on instagram, side eyes, selfies with a slightly tilted head, sometimes cutely gaped open mouth other times closed (either way it makes me wanna squish her cheeks most of the time), 'izzy i have tea! well...not really tea! actually no it's tea!', talking late into the night (well...the morning), sunlight and blue sky seeping into her blinds, 'come get unready with me!'

@littleroaes

pastel purple, pastel pink, pastel blue, basically fairy floss, innocence and beauty, supportive and real, very shy, long white dresses, flowers all around her dancing in the wind, but is also very funny, drawing reactions, sometimes talking in all caps, sometimes talking with lower caps, all the time very cute, sitting down at the beach and watching sunsets

@mosviqu

pink and white, scarfs and gloves, long-sleeved shirts paired with short skirts, long drives with dynamic playlists changes, and would ask her friends to go and make sure they have a great time, jamming out to a playlist at 3am (but she has a healthy sleep schedule so), that one friend who knows what to do, not afraid to express herself 99% of the time, the other 1% is just the world being mean, will always be a white cat, 'izzy i'm so proud of you', words of comfort, head pats!!, artistically talented, eric sohn's soulmate

@winterchimez

soulmates (but lives in the wrong country), ireland, loving mother vibes, but also tired mother vibes, sunrise vibes but specifically orange and yellow, hard worker, faith in god, quiet art museums but also bustling concert halls, turning bitterness in life into a lesson that can never be replaced and is always thankful for the opportunity even though the period of that life was hard, mental and physical resilience through crazy back to back schedules, videocalling on the bus/train on the way home, 'so/saur', my favourite purple jacket, music and piano are forever ally's vibe tbh, 'if i missed your call, i will always call you back'

@zzoguri

crying when seeing a friend, headphones all day every day, classy look, black top with light blue jeans, vintage camera film filter, journalism (it really does suit you), 'YEAH YEAH I GET YOU!', crying about uni (same tho 😭), gaming for hours, specifically valorant, my infj bestie, acoustic guitar vibes (ykwim?), 'you're so valid though', a distinct unique accent, jacob bae's partner

#💖 izzy answers your asks! #📣 izzy's tag games! #gill ⛸️🥇 #clo 🎧🤍 #yumi 🎀🧸 #sana ☘️🐝 #j 🦝🍚 #dora 💌💜 #bar 🫂💕 #ally my soulmate ❄️🎶 #moni 🫶🍊

[bradshawsbitch]

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ » 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐥

⁘ through rhett's guiding hands, you may find a way out of your lonely path of darkness.

› pairing; preacher!rhett abbott x reader

word count; ~ 1.2K

× chapter warnings; religious themes, religious content, baptism, submerging in water, preacher rhett abbott, mostly my musings about feeling lost within faith

disclaimer; I was born in a country that is extremely secularised. I consider myself agnostic, but I do feel a strange sort of ambivalence towards my religion. I grew up a Protestant, and through my visits to sermons and church, we have only ever been preached to about the love and acceptance from God. I find myself quite unable to sort of let go of the resentment I feel from having had to endure quite a lot of trauma in my young age, and it felt quite cathartic for me to write this piece. this is in no way meant to shine a light on anything predatory what-so-ever, but more so my own ramblings and feelings.

Blinding light guided you, bare feet stepping slowly over the dirt and grass on the path to salvation. The air around you felt static, the very leaves of the aspen shaking as if in anticipation of what was to come, matching the raw nerves that laid on top of your skin like frayed electric wires. The beat of your heart rushed in your ears, pumped in your chest, as parted lips took in shallow breaths. 

You were the last of the small crowd. Last to be blessed. To be saved. Around you stood people wrapped in towels, talking in hushed tones to their loved ones. Smiling softly as their ceremony had ended. But they were barely visible to you. There was only the path to your grace before you, only the path to Him.

It was rather symbolic, you thought as you inhaled sharply at that first cold feel of the water washing over your feet; that you would wade through the waters of the lake to him. He stood waist deep, waiting for you, he who had been given the mission by Him.

To cleanse you. To heal you. To guide you. To love you. 

Fingertips graced the very surface of the water, eyes transfixed on the man who waited to give you your grace. Sunlight shone softly through the aspen leaves, dancing across his face, sometimes making those blue eyes a true cerulean as he smiled at you.

The ceremonies before you had taken some time, and the sun now seemed to be right behind him. It only seemed fitting. He was the only light you had left. The only one with unconditional love in his heart for people like you. 

You couldn’t look away from his gaze. Everything else fell away tothe periphery. You could no longer hear the song of the bird or the sweet call of the wind rustling the leaves. There was only him, and your shallow breathing as you neared him, your thin, white gown floating around your hips as you stood before him. 

“Sweet lamb…” Rhett’s voice was low enough that only you could hear him.  

“Reverend.” your voice shook slightly with anticipation, lips trembling slightly with a sweet smile. Rhett’s blue eyes twinkled with delight, slowly moving to place a strand of hair behind your ear. 

“You look divine… ” Rhett spoke softly, one hand already at your back to position you to his liking in the lake. Nodding slowly, you smiled up at him as his other hand circled your wrist.

You knew how this procedure would go. Had dreamed about it for the months that you had spent learning about this new path in your life. It almost felt as if you were in a dream, ready to finally be in His protecting embrace. 

“Are you ready to accept this holy sacrament?” the deep timbre of his voice touched your very heart as your eyes fluttered closed.

“I am.”

You could feel his strong arms lower you into the waters of the lake, your white gown floating weightlessly around your naked body. You were floating too, held only by the secure hands of him.

Opening your eyes, the sunlight filtered through the water, glittering and twinkling around the blurry visage of the man who made you feel the safest you had ever felt. It shone behind him, much like a halo, and it felt so symbolic - floating weightlessly with only his hands to hold and guide you out of the darkness of the water. 

He had truly saved you. Had made you believe again that you were deserving of unconditional love. You were beautiful as you are. After only a few moments, you felt Rhett’s strong hands move from their hold on your wrist as he guided you to the surface, first splaying across your sternum to keep you steady as you rose, his large palm soothing your beating heart, making it flutter with a sense of excitement. Once you emerged, his hand drifted down to your waist to help you find your footing in the soft sand below you. 

Rhett, who had purposefully saved you for last, smiled softly down at you as she submerged you into the water, symbolizing the death and resurrection of his Lord. He had never met a person as eager as you, had never felt more protective over an individual as he had you.

When you had first found him, he could tell you were a broken soul, one that life had unfortunately dealt heavy cards. Rhett never knew why the Lord chose to put such awful hurdles in the path of the sweetest of souls. But he could not be mad at Him, for he had brought you to his presence. There must always be a meaning, and Rhett believed he was meant for you. 

You, who had opened your heart and soul for him, not shy to be vulnerable and explain your anger, your hurt and your belief that God had surely never looked favorably upon you. Had with such reverence listened to his guidance as he took in your story, bit by bit, until he had unraveled your tragedy riddled life. He had to admit, he had heard much cruelties throughout his years as a preacher, but hearing your sweet voice speak of such atrocities made his heart ache in his chest. 

It therefore pleased him to see your eyes alight with hope, eyes that before held such sadness and lack of faith, now shone in their excitement to have Him follow you through whichever path you happened upon in your life. 

Speaking your name softly as you emerged from the water, blinking slowly up at him, he continued as he held your shaking body close to his own “let the Lord offer you his grace, and may he always walk beside you in the paths of your life, lending you strength through his unconditional love…” his hand gently rested upon your head, closing his eyes momentarily to truly feel the energy within his palm surge over you. He hoped his light might protect you. Might offer you peace. Opening his eyes, he noted that the clearing was empty now, the people he had baptized before you walking home to their cottages.

He let his eyes roam over your soaked form, the way droplets of water ran down your neck, over your chest and down your stomach. Your sheer white dress clung to your every curve, and Rhett was only human as he thought of how beautiful you looked right now. 

“Thank you,” you had spoken so softly as you leaned in to his chest, eyes watering a little with emotion as you smiled up at him. “for hearing me… and for seeing me in a time of loneliness.”

Shaking his head, he once again let his fingers grace over your cheek, cradling it in his warm palm as he let his lips brush gently over your forehead. The song of the birds was back, and the gentleness of the wind caressed your form again as he spoke;

“I’ll see to it that you never walk alone again.” 

tagging; @lewmagoo @sebsxphia

#anyways this was weird #and also my writing is shitty rn #oh well #preacher!rhett abbott #preacher!rhett abbott x reader #rhett abbott x reader #my writing

[razorblade180]

Blue Sky

Nahida:Hello~ how are we on this wonderful day?

Scara:*laying down*….

Nahida:More often than not, a person’s silence screams louder than a packed festival. Or in your case…raging thunder.

Scara:I know what you’re trying to do and it’s not going to work. You’re far to green at all this, god of wisdom.

Nahida:Hehe, you say that as if we aren’t close in age. As far seeing through me, I’m afraid that’s impossible. Even I am unsure of my actions.

Scara:Like I said, green.

Nahida:You’re unsure of yourself as well. It’s rare for any being to make peace with themselves. Especially those with long lives such as-

Scara:Oh Buer, don’t ever compare me to the likes of you. You who couldn’t even face me alone and turned to mortals to cover for your own failings as a god. It’s laughable.

Nahida:Then laugh.

Scara:What?

Nahida:It’s something is funny then you laugh. Laugh at me and all my faults.

Scara:…….

Nahida:I’ll be honest, I wish I could laugh at it too, the honest effort I put in just to come up short. Instead I get frustrated, cry even. Feelings I’d be ashamed to show my people, but by no means are they terrible to have. No matter how much a flower loves the sunlight, it’s always going to need rainy days to help it grow. You’re trying not to have any weather at all! It’s hypocrisy considering the praise you give yourself.

Scara:Now you try belittling me?

Nahida:Quite the opposite. I like you better than you like yourself. If they wasn’t the case, then you wouldn’t have called the life you once lived “small and ugly”

Scara:It doesn’t matter.

Nahida:But it does to you!!!! If it didn’t then you wouldn’t be here.

Scara:I am here because I peek your interests. With so much wisdom at your command you choose something as blind as faith. What were you expecting from this little conversation! What do I have to do to get you to throw me away and go on about your life nation, huh!?

Nahida:Why would you want to be thrown away!?

Scara:I don’t!

Nahida:Then why do you think I would!?

Scara:BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT HAPPENED NEXT! RIGHT AFTER SHE-

Nahida:

Nahida:Was it scary, seeing me reach for the gnosis?

The Balladeer felt his body tremble. He could no longer look anywhere besides his hands that gripped his chest. Nahida stepped closer, cautiously reaching out and putting her hands on his fists.

Nahida:Like I said before, I’m unsure of my actions. I just know…there’s no way to describe what it’s like to be tossed away and lost for 500 years. So can you stop pretending you’re above that; because I’m a god and I’m certainly not! Don’t pretend it’s not raining and feel it! I promise you…the blues skies will come back when it’s over.

Scaramouche said nothing. He just…trembled where he sat, unable to contain the storm inside him as he began weep angrily; then in pure misery. Nahida watched the puppet cry for first time. In was then she knew, no matter how long it took, she wasn’t gonna leave him until he found that blue sky again.

#genshin impact #nahida #scaramouche

[mermaidxatxheart]

My Church

This is... indulgent. Send help. Also, I made the mood board, I'm experimenting.

Pairing: Poe Dameron x Reader

Word Count: 8k

Warnings: Smut. Smutty, smut, smut with barely a side of plot. Teasing, sort of public sex, Poe being a simp (my favorite, I love a man in love), p in v, oral public, both female and male receiving. I think that's all. If I missed anything, sorry about it.

Summary: You and Poe dance around each other. Mondays are a time for religion, finding faith and solace in the Maker. But not everyone finds faith the traditional way.

Poe Dameron. He is exactly your type, and the smug bastard knows it. Maybe that’s why you resist him so hard. You don’t hate him, not by a long shot. You flirt with him as hard as he flirts with you. You’ve become engaged in a war of sorts to see who can make the other blush more. 

Now, you’ll never say never, but. Poe Dameron is gonna have to really work for it if he really wants it. 

Probably. 

Maybe. 

***

The hangar is just about empty. You’re only a few minutes away from blissful silence and Maker, are you ready. Most folks on base go to service on Mondays, they look for peace, solace, forgiveness for all the things that fighting in the Resistance requires. But you? Your church is when you’re alone on your ship, making the slightest alterations so that she runs smoothly, perfectly. Your life, your team’s life depends on it. 

That’s where you feel closest to the Maker, when you’re making things yourself. 

Today, you have the biggest migraine, your vision is slowly disappearing in your left eye and the bright sunlight is practically blinding what’s left. 

You climb into your ship, wiggling under the console in an awkward position. Laying down at an angle probably isn’t the best for your headache, but it’s quiet, save for the pulse pounding in your ears. 

You probably shouldn’t be soldering when you can only see out of one eye, either. But it’s never stopped you before, and it certainly won’t now. 

“Isn’t that uncomfortable?” A voice asks above you, scaring you. You jerk, smacking your head on the metal casing and burning your fingers with the white flame. 

A strangled cry escapes as you clamp your jaw shut before any curse words can come out. “Dameron!” You shout, aiming a kick at where you think his face should be. Sadly, you miss. 

He grabs your ankles and pulls you out easily. “What the hell are you doing?” He huffs, tilting your face to see it better. He disappears as he leans to your left and touches a painful spot on your head. 

“Working. Why aren’t you with everyone else?” You demand, swatting his hand away. You had been counting on everyone else being at service. 

“Not my thing. Come here.” He grabs your arm and hauls you over to a tool chest. “Sit. You’re bleeding.”

“And you made me burn my fingers.” You grumble. 

“And why aren’t you at service?” He asks, even though he already knows the answer. 

“Not my thing.” You sigh. You let him fuss over you, bandaging the cut on your forehead. His fingers are soft on your skin, moving easily. You close your eyes against the too-bright light, wondering why you keep saying no to him. You like him, a lot, you have way too much in common not to be friends. 

“How’s your head?” He asks quietly. 

“I have a migraine, but I had one before you damaged me.” You say, letting your head droop forward against his solid chest. He smells good, coolness mixed with your favorite smells from your ship. Reminds you of home. 

“I didn’t damage you. Let me see your hand.” He guides you back up straight and you hold your hand up for him. He puts his sunglasses over your eyes to help with the light and your heart swells a little at the simple gesture. 

Seriously, why do you keep saying no again? It’s getting harder to remember. He puts a salve on your fingers before wrapping them tightly. 

He’s quiet, too quiet, and you know the question is gonna explode out of him. He just can’t help himself. The tension is rising, it feels like a physical thing, wrapping itself around you like a soft, warm cloak. You like when he gets like this-fighting it until he simply can’t anymore. You can feel his eyes on your lips as he works, and just to tease him, you slowly wet them, biting lightly on your lower one. The invisible cloak gets just a little heavier and you shift, letting your knees spread to either side of his waist. 

He lasts just long enough to finish wrapping your fingers. “Go out with me.” He blurts all in one breath, even sounds like one word. Flustered with himself, he hangs his head. You slide off the tool box, pressed tightly against him. The cloak gets heavier and you can hear him swallow thickly. 

You cup his chin and turn his face away from yours. His pulse is racing under your fingers and you smile to yourself. Oh yeah. This is why. 

“Thanks for fixing me up.” You whisper and press a kiss to his cheek, slow and soft. You feel his hand clench into a fist at your side. You move to step away, his head staying where you left it. 

“Uh… m-my sunglasses.” He reminds you. 

“Come by my room later and get them.” You smirk, heading for the darkness of your room. You can take the day off to sleep. 

So quietly, you almost don’t think you really hear it, he whispers one soft fuck.

***

Poe

His hands won’t stop shaking. You absolutely wreck him. It’s been four hours since you’ve kissed his cheek. His fucking cheek, the most innocent thing you could have done, and it completely scattered his marbles. 

Every time he thinks he has the upper hand, you destroy him. And he wants to thank you for it. What the fuck is wrong with him?

He paces outside your door, nerves rattling around his stomach like a loose bolt, trying to gather his courage. He’s never actually been in your room, why would he? Does it smell like you? All flowers and sunshine. What are you doing in there? 

He raises a trembling hand, glaring at it before knocking loudly. You don’t answer and he wonders if you’re even inside. Maybe you got rid of your migraine and went out for some fun. He knocks one more time just in case. The door whooshes open in his face and he steps back automatically. 

It’s dark in your room. Too dark for him to see very well. He steps inside and the door closes behind him. He stands rooted to the spot while his eyes adjust. 

“Poe?” You mumble, your voice thick and husky with sleep and oh, Maker, he wants to join you in that bed. 

“Y-yeah.” He clears his throat. “You said to come for my sunglasses.” He says, incredibly lamely. 

“Well, come get them.” You taunt from across the room. “There’s nothing in your way.” You promise and he carefully makes his way across, his eyes adjusting quickly. 

“Are you feeling better?” He asks. 

“A bit. No thanks to you.” You tease and his heart hammers in his chest. 

He reaches the side of your bed and looks down, making out your form. His wildly galloping heart slams to a stop and sticks in his throat as he realizes you’re just wearing a bra. You’re on your stomach, bare back exposed to the room, to him, head turned to the side to look up at him through the dark lenses of his glasses. 

“What’s the matter?” You ask wickedly and he licks his dry lips. Is it hot in here? Did the temp modulator just kick on? 

“Uh… um…. I mean—“ he stammers and you chuckle, rolling over onto your back. 

“You okay, Dameron?” You taunt.

“If you still n-need them… I can just get them later.” He lies. 

The smile that graces your gorgeous face burns into his memory. It’s predatory, hungry. You love to drive him crazy. Ever since you came to base, he hasn’t given a womp rat’s ass about anyone else. Hasn’t hooked up with anyone, hasn’t looked at anyone. He’s only had eyes for you. And while sometimes he thinks you like him back, you make it so hard to tell. 

You push yourself up to your knees, the blanket falling away from your body and it feels like it’s boiling in the room. 

“Are you going out tonight?” You ask softly, as if your whole world depends on his answer. A little thrill goes through his chest at the possibility of that before he answers. 

“I was thinking about it.” He says; he’s desperate for a drink now. Anything to cool down. 

“Hmm.” You hum low and in the back of your throat as you lean against him. “Maybe I’ll go, too.” You say and his pulse thuds in his ears.  

“If you don’t feel good, don’t go.” He says like a fucking idiot.

Your hands trail down his arms, scorching his skin until he thinks it just might blister. “I feel perfect right now.” You whisper, lifting his hands and placing them on your bare waist. He can feel the lacy fabric of your underwear on your hips and his throat is painfully dry. 

“Did you take anything for your head?” He asks suspiciously, wondering if maybe you were high.

“Do you wanna know what I did to cure my migraine?” You ask softly, leaning closer to him. 

Maker, he feels his face heat up as he thinks about you masturbating. “Y-Y/N,” he chokes. 

You lift your hands off his chest and remove his glasses, hooking them into the front of his shirt. Your off balance body weight is now just supported by him. 

“Your heart is racing.” You comment, laying your hand flat against his chest. 

“You’re making me crazy.” He admits without even meaning to. 

“Hmm. I like that.” You lean forward, pressing your soft, soft lips to his and his entire brain short-circuits. He registers your perfect lips moving against his, coaxing him out of his frozen state, understands that his hands are touching your bare skin in your bedroom, but it’s like he’s been rendered incapable of doing a damn thing about it. 

Your sweet tongue drags across his bottom lip, begging for entrance, and that’s when he starts kissing you back. He holds you closer, fingers pressing into your back, molding you against his frame. Your fingers curl in his hair, nails scraping against his scalp, and Maker help him, he doesn’t know which way is up. 

You start to sway on the spot and he holds you tighter, pulling back from the kiss. He guides you back onto the bed gently, resisting when you try to hold onto him. 

“Get some more sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He promises. 

You sigh and slump back, flinging an arm over your head. “Why’d you have to be such a good kisser?” You grumble and he grins. 

“Why’d you have to kiss me?” He fires back. You flip him off and he chuckles, stepping back from the bed. He takes his sunglasses off his shirt and sets them silently on your bedside table. He’d never be able to wear them again, knowing how much better they look on you. 

He exits your room and takes a deep breath, lips warm and tingling from your kiss. 

You kissed him.

The smile that spreads across his face is stupid and giddy. But he still has no clue if you actually like him, or just like to fuck with his head. 

It’s okay, he has all the time in the world. 

***

The cantina is loud. So loud, and Poe loves it. Loves the pulsing energy of all his friends drinking and having a good time. He stops outside the door to take a deep, clean breath. Probably the last one he’ll get for a good long while. He pushes through the door and takes stock. A sabaacc game is being played in one corner, a game of pool in the middle. 

He stops when he hears a laugh that haunts him; keeps him up at night and teases him all day long. You. You’re perched at the bend in the bar, holding court and telling some story to a group of your friends. Your hand is curled around a glass of dark liquid as you laugh, head tipped back. A look of sheer perfection, he can’t tear his eyes away. Your thin tank top shows off your tone arms, the strip of soft skin along your belly, and more cleavage than he can handle. Your shorts are tantalizing, just gracing the tops of your thighs, your long legs ending in your combat boots. Maker.

His eyes trail up to your neck, the silver chain of your dog tags catching his eye. You lower your head, dazzling smile still in place, and you’re wearing his kriffing sunglasses. Your head turns just a fraction of an inch and he just knows you’ve spotted him. Instead of giving you what you want, which is a reaction, he simply nods at you and walks over to Snap and Jessika playing pool. 

Snap claps him on the shoulder, asking if he wants a drink. He shakes his head, thinking it’s probably good to keep his head straight. 

“New recruits.” Jessika says, jerking her head over Poe’s shoulder. 

He doesn’t want to look, doesn’t care enough to be bothered. But then he hears your voice clear across the noisy crowd. 

“Excellent. New blood.” You say, and he knows that tone. His arms cross over his chest, hands balled into fists under his biceps. He wants to look at you, to see if you’re just goading him. But he’s not sure if he wants to know, because what if you’re not? What if you’re really looking for someone else besides him? What if he was never on the table for you?

The new people fill the room and he refuses to turn around. Snap is eyeing him suspiciously and then his eyes widen. 

“Um, Mr. Dameron?” A voice starts behind him, timid, unsettling. 

He turns around to see a woman, young by his standards lately. She could be pretty, if he couldn’t see you in the background. Instead, she’s plain. He forces his eyes back to the girl in front of him. “Hi.” He says, smiling charmingly suddenly. 

Time to find out how you really feel. 

“I just wanted to say that I’m a huge fan of yours. Your piloting techniques are an inspiration, and the reason I became a pilot in the first place. There are cantinas all over Yavin-4 that have your holo up, and tables reserved.” She rushes. “They even say that if you come back, you’d drink for free.” She pauses adorably. “Although, they probably say that because they know you’ll never come back.” She shrugs. His eyes flick over to you and you have a man, more of a boy, in front of you, trying to hold your attention. 

“You’re from Yavin?” He asks, pleasantly surprised as he lowers himself onto the side of the pool table. 

“Yes, sir.” She beams. 

He chuckles. “Please, it’s Poe.” He holds out his hand to shake hers. “I didn’t catch your name, darlin’.”

She places her trembling hand in his, and he raises it to his lips, kissing the back of it. “Jara.” She squeaks and he smiles broadly, a sense of elation filling him as your face slowly colors. 

“Jara. Well, Jara. If you need anything at all, you let me know. Us Yavinites gotta stick together.” He says and she nods. 

“Thank you so much.” She beams. 

“Go have a drink, enjoy yourself.” He says and she spins on the spot, turning away from him. 

“Dangerous game, pal. Y/N looks ready to kill you.” Snap says, gripping his shoulder tightly. 

Poe grins and glances at you before standing and turning back to the pool table. “I think her migraine came back.” He says, a thrill going through his chest. You definitely look mad. 

“Oh, she’s getting up.” Snap narrates under his breath. “Oh,” he frowns. “She’s going out back.” 

What? There’s nothing out back. It’s a dead end alley that they use for storage and people use for a smoke. And you don’t smoke. 

Maybe you just needed some air. It’s fairly loud, and your headache probably hasn’t completely gone yet. If you’re not back in ten minutes, he’ll go check on you. 

“Let me know if you see her come back in.” Poe mutters and Snap nods, glancing over his shoulder. 

“Her new little friend looks confused.” Jessika chuckles. “Maybe someone should explain your complicated relationship?” She glances at Poe and he frowns. 

“What do you mean?” He asks. 

“Poe, come on.” She rolls her eyes as though he’s the biggest moof milker in the galaxy. “When she got here, you stopped fooling around with anyone at all. And she’s never hooked up with anyone. She flirts with you. She only gives attention to one person. We all thought you two were together, just… weird about it.” She shrugs and Poe glances over his shoulder at the doorway to the back. It’s completely visible from where he stands, but there’s no sign of you. 

“Just go check on her. You’re throwing off my game.” Snap sighs and Poe only hesitates for a second before heading out the same door. 

A hand grabs his elbow, pulling him to the left and shoving him against the wall. His heart thuds unreliably in his chest as he looks at your face. Your skin is glowing in the bright moonlight, striking him with how goddess-like you look. Your fingers dig into the flesh of his shoulders as you hold him against the wall, even though he’s not remotely fighting you. 

“What. Was. That?” You ask lowly and he frowns, playing dumb. 

“What was what?” He asks and you clench your jaw, turning your head away from him. He gently touches your chin and you slap his hand away, cheeks darkening beautifully. “You mean the little girl who wanted to talk to her hometown hero?” He prompts.

“You kissed her hand, you were flirting.” You mutter and he grins. 

“I may have kissed her hand, but I kissed you.” He reminds you, touching your chin again, trying to get you to look at him. 

You slap his hand away again. “I didn’t like it.” You continue.

“My kiss? Or me flirting?” 

“Both.” You huff, annoyed. 

“You liked my kiss.” He teases. He has you. The jealousy is coming off you in waves strong enough to tip over a bantha. 

“...Hated it.” You protest. 

“Want me to do it again?” He asks, his heart knocking into his sternum, it’s beating so hard. 

“...Yes.” You grumble.

Finally.

He takes your hand, gentle as can be, and pulls you close. His big hand cups the back of your neck, warm and soft. His thumb brushes along your jaw and he uses it to tilt your head back. With his free hand, he takes his sunglasses off your face and tucks them into your pocket. 

His eyes slide down to your parted lips, so perfect. He lowers his head, capturing your mouth with his, so soft and sweet. Your lips move against his, hungry and desperate, just like him. He could spend the rest of forever kissing you, and it still wouldn’t be enough. Your fingers rake through his hair, scraping at his scalp as you try to hold him closer. Your hands trail down his chest, pausing to unbutton his shirt. 

“Y/N,” he breaks away raggedly. 

“Wanna see you.” You gasp, capturing his mouth again. Fuck. He makes quick work of his buttons, despite how his hands are shaking. You push it open, hands splayed across his chest, nails pressing in over his pecs as you drive him to delirium. Your hand, surprisingly strong, grips his jaw. You pull him away from your heavenly mouth, twisting his face to the side. You’re panting as hard as he is. “Wanna see you come apart for me.” You whisper, licking along his own dog tag chain and up his neck. You bite at his ear and he can barely control the moan that escapes his throat. 

“Gonna… let… me… see?” You ask, kissing and nipping back down his neck. Your tongue drags down his chest before he remembers how to breathe. 

“Fuck. Yes.” He hisses as your sinful lips close around his nipple. “Whatever you want.” He gasps. 

You drag your teeth over it and, Maker, he's getting rock hard. “Tell me.” You pant, fingers dancing over his trembling abs. “Tell me who you want.” You plead. 

“Y/N. It’s only ever been you.” He groans. 

You unbutton his trousers, jerking them open and pushing down the front enough to pull out his cock and balls. You moan softly, looking down at him. “Gonna let me see?” You repeat hungrily. 

“Want you t-to.” He nods. 

With one hand pressed against his chest to keep him where you want him, you drag your tongue up your palm, pushing your fingers into your mouth to get them wet. His cock twitches happily, finally getting what it wants. Y/N. Any way it can. 

“Fucking perfect.” You breathe, watching it dance for you. “Stay quiet. Our friends are right inside.” You remind him hazily. His heart hammers and then you wrap your hand around his thick cock, squeezing in the best way as you drag your hand to the tip. He’s weeping precum for you and you rub your thumb around the crown, smearing it for yourself. 

One of his hands grips at the wall behind him, while the other covers yours, gripping your bandaged fingers like a lifeline. He pants heavily as you tease the crown before squeezing back down to the base. You’re happy to take your time, explore his shaft to your twisted heart’s content. You start pumping slowly, tormenting him in all the best ways. 

He pants your name and you shush him, slowing down. You rub your fingers around the head, finding all the spots that make him buck and thrust into your fist. Your nails drag around his nipples, tormenting him as you take your time slowly stroking his throbbing cock. 

The crowd roars in the pub and he’s reminded that you’re doing this to him in public. That you couldn’t wait, had to touch him. Your hand on his chest covers his mouth as his panting gets too loud and he sucks your fingers inside, licking them thoroughly. Fuck, the taste of your skin is delirium inducing. You let out the softest moan as his tongue pushes between your fingers and he bucks into your hand. 

You’re breathing as hard as he is, hand still exploring his cock, gripping the base and pulling slowly. Maker, you drive him insane. You reach down and cup his balls, massaging slowly and he groans desperately. 

“Poe,” you whisper, eyes searching his. “I don’t wanna fight it anymore.” You start pumping faster, harder. Your palm twists around his shaft, thumb catching the crown just right. “Wanna be yours.” You pant. His mouth falls open as you pull, dragging pleasure through him that he’s never felt before. “Wanna be the reason you come apart.” You moan. Your hand is a blur on his cock and he’s so close. You kneel before him, opening your mouth, the tip of your tongue lapping slowly at the underside of his cock and that pushes him over the edge. He explodes with a quiet grunt, bucking his hips and cumming in your mouth, your warm breath puffing over his heated skin. 

“Fuck.” He groans, his legs shaking hard. You look up at him, rolling his cum over your tongue before swallowing it loudly. Your eyes flutter closed as though you’re savoring the taste. You lick the head softly before standing up. He pulls you in for a kiss, tasting himself on your perfect lips. He grips your ass, holding you tight. “We should get out of here.” He whispers.

You nod mutely, your face flushed beautifully. He wonders if you’re wet for him between those perfect thighs. He plans on finding out. A lot. 

“Stay here. I’ll meet you in your room.” You whisper. You take a second to adjust your clothes before rounding the corner back into the cantina. 

***

You leave Poe in the alley, your heart pounding with the thrill of what you just did. Fuck, you want to do it again. Everywhere. Anywhere. You told him to meet you in his room. Something about it being his bed he fucks you in-it makes you weak. 

“Y/N,” someone calls for you before you can escape. You turn to see the new recruit you had been talking to before Poe wrecked your concentration. Your hands ball into fists as you remember the gentle kiss he placed on her hand. The tender way he looked at her, like he was going to kiss her mouth the way he should have been kissing yours. Something spikes inside you. You want to slap that little girl for some irrational reason. 

“Yeah? Sorry I disappeared.” You smile, anxious to leave already. 

“Have a drink.” He says, holding out a shot glass. His eyes slide down your face to your chest. 

Well, if Poe can flirt, so can you. 

You step up to the bar, taking the glass from him. “Just one.” You wink at him, licking the salt off his hand slowly as Poe enters the bar again behind you. Your heart skips several important beats in anticipation. You down the burning liquid as the recruit stares at you helplessly. You smack your lips, placing the glass back in his outstretched hand. 

“Thanks for the drink, handsome.” You say, giving him a gentle chuck under the chin before heading for the exit. 

You practically skip towards the dorms. You can feel Poe behind you, glaring at you. The way he’s following you, the anger rolling off him-it feels like you’re being hunted; and Maker if that doesn’t make you wet. 

You stop mid-stride and glance towards the trees that border the path you’re on. If you continue straight, you’d find the quarters for officers. To the left, the forest of dense trees. Most people don’t go that way, the foliage is too tightly intertwined. But you like the quiet of it. 

Knowing Poe will follow you, you head for the trees. You breach the line, ducking under branches and climbing over fallen logs. You reach an open patch, moonlight filling the small space when a hand grabs you and guides you back into a tree. 

“Care to explain that?” Poe hisses, his other hand gripping your chin. 

Fuck, he makes you so fucking weak. 

“You flirted. I flirted.” You shrug dangerously. There’s a wicked glint in his beautiful eyes, heavy-lidded, predatory. 

“You and I have very different definitions of flirting.” He huffs, his hand twisting to cup your throat, his thumb stroking along your jaw. You’re incredibly aware that all he has to do is squeeze and he can control your breathing. 

“Maybe.” 

“Maybe.” He repeats. “Maybe you’d rather take him to bed.” He growls. 

“If I wanted that little boy, I’d be in there right now. It would be so easy to get him.” You say quietly. Butterflies rocket around your stomach with every word. He’s getting more and more silent as you torment him. “You should have seen the way he was staring at my chest while he offered me a drink.” You hum. 

“And you liked that?” Poe demands. Oh, fuck! Your knees nearly give out on you. 

“What I like, Commander Dameron, is the way you’ve always directed your words to my face. A man knows how to talk to a woman. A boy talks to her breasts.” You say, reaching up to touch his dark locks. They look so soft in the pale moonlight. 

He grabs your hand and pins it to the tree above your head. “You licked his hand.” 

“And probably made him cum in his pants.” You smirk. “Want me to lick your hand to make up for it, Commander? Or did you have another body part in mind?” You taunt. 

Fuck, you’re talking big, feeling much braver in the dark. 

“Why come out here?” He asks, his thumb still stroking your jaw. 

“I wanted you outside. We aren’t that far off the path. Anyone can catch us out here. I want you to make me cum against this tree.” You murmur, lifting your chin and exposing your throat for him. 

“Fuck.” He moans, kissing you hungrily. His lips are fucking perfect, soft and pliant as they meld with yours once more. His five o’clock shadow scrapes against your soft skin and, Maker, you want to feel that burn between your thighs. His tongue pushes into your mouth, licking and exploring you. You whimper with need, his strong hands keeping you exactly where he wants you. 

His thick thigh pushes between yours, pressing right up against your cunt. You grind on it helplessly, so fucking turned on by this man. His hand drops from your throat to the button of your short shorts. You wore these especially for him, to taunt him with as much flesh as you could. Now you would pay for it. 

He makes quick work of the buttons, quicker one handed than you would be with both. He bites at your lower lip and you moan, lifting your free hand to touch his face. He grabs it and secures it over your head with the other. 

“Naughty girls don’t get to touch things.” He mutters. “Especially things that don’t belong to them.”

You lean forward, licking at his lips. “Don’t you belong to me, though?” You whisper. “Just as I belong to you.”  

His eyes blaze with a new kind of fire as he kisses you. It steals your breath away and you melt into him. His free hand slides up your tank top, pushing it up over your bra. It’s all lace and see through, just for him. Silver against your dark skin in the pale light and he groans. He rubs his thumb over your hardening nipple and you lift your chest into his hand. 

“So fuckin’ pretty.” He whispers. 

“Touch me. Please? I need to feel your hands on me.” You whisper. 

He cups your breast, holding it in his palm as his thumb brushes back and forth over your nipple. He hooks his finger over the lace and guides it down under your breast. He lowers his head and licks it slowly. 

Fuuuuuck. You press your legs together to keep from cumming just from watching him do that. You’ve fought wanting him for so long, knowing he’s exactly your type, knowing your type isn’t good for you-and yet, here you are. He licks again and again, the point of his tongue flicking over your hardened bud. You moan, savoring the feel of his wet mouth on your sensitive skin. He stays there, exploring your body, and your restraint, for what feels like forever. 

Bra pulled down, shirt pushed up, shorts pushed to your knees, he has you mewling. You’re a fucking mess for him and all he’s done is suck on your nipples. 

“Didn’t wear any panties tonight? Just to torture me, huh?” He mutters. 

“Couldn’t stand the thought.” You manage. 

Voices can be heard on the path, leaving the cantina. He spins you around, pressing your hands against the tree. “Ready for the show?” He asks, pulling your hips back to him so you’re leaning forward quite a bit. “Your hands stay here. You move them, I stop.” He warns and you nod, your whole body already trembling. “Spread your legs, gorgeous.” He says, guiding your feet apart as wide as they’ll go. 

He wraps one arm around your waist, sliding them between your thighs. The cool night air feels amazing on your heated, wet flesh. His crotch is pressed tight against your bare ass and you can feel his cock, ready for round two. His other arm wraps around your chest, cupping your tit and rolling your nipple between his fingers. 

Your folds are slick as he slides his digits in, finding your clit easily. You buck as he makes contact and he chuckles. 

“So sensitive.” He teases, swirling his finger around it slowly. 

Oh, Maker. 

He slides his fingers back further, finding your dripping slit. “You’re so wet for me.” He praises, dragging his fingers back up to your clit. 

“Always.” You moan. “Always you.” 

His cock twitches against your ass and you’re desperate for him. You can hear the people getting closer as he picks up the pace on stroking your clit. He easily finds the places that make you cry out and squirm. He rubs slow, determined circles over your clit, driving you crazy, listening to you pant under him. 

“P-Poe, pull h-harder on my nipple. P-please?” You whimper and he obliges. You gasp as pleasure spikes right to your core, you buck in his hand. He twists and pulls on it as his fingers slide down to your slit once more, pushing in deep. You moan loudly at the stretch of them, walls fluttering rapidly. 

“Oh fuck.” You gasp, dropping your head. The heel of his hand grinds up on your clit as his fingers work inside you, finding all the right places to turn you into a dripping, quivering mess for him. 

The voices get louder, closer-there are more of them. Your friends, just on the other side of those trees while their commander has his fingers in your cunt. The coil in your belly tightens into a blinding light as Poe leans forward, pressing a kiss to your shoulder. 

“Such a good girl.” He praises and the coil snaps. Your legs give out as you cum, hips bucking and grinding on his hand. His strong arms support you as you cling to the tree, vision dimming as your eyes roll back into your head. You gasp raggedly, feeling Poe clutch you to his chest as he guides you through it, floating you back down gently. 

The voices pass, none the wiser of what was going on. Poe pulls his fingers out of your still trembling pussy and sucks them clean. “Fuck, you taste so good.” He moans. 

When you don’t move after a moment, Poe shifts you back against him to better see your face. “You okay, sweetheart?” He asks with a chuckle. 

Your eyes are closed still as you try to recover from such an intense orgasm. Maybe it’s because it’s been so long since another person has made you cum, or maybe it’s because it was Poe, or the situation of possibly getting caught, but you’re so blissed out right now.

“So good.” You mumble, reaching up for his face. You want to kiss him again. You haven’t been able to stop thinking about his lips on yours since the hangar. 

He sits on the ground, shifting you to take off your shorts completely so you can straddle his lap. 

“I like this.” You whisper, leaning forward to capture his mouth. He surges forward to meet you, fingers tangling in your hair before sliding down your back. His lips are impossibilities, hungry and urgent and yet so soft and gentle at the same time. His tongue swipes across your lower lip and of course, you open for him. You moan in your throat as he rocks his hips up into you. His fingertips dig into your hips as you grind them slowly, soaking the front of his trousers. 

“We should get...back to my room.” He mumbles, kissing down your jaw and nipping at the apex. 

“Or you could fuck me right here.” You suggest breathlessly. 

He chuckles, pulling back. “As much as I love seeing you in the moonlight, I have more I want to do to you that requires a bed.”

You pout and he grins. “Alright.” Shakily, you stand up and reach for your shorts but he pulls them out of your reach. “Poe, I can’t walk through the compound naked. Everyone will see me.” You say nervously. Does he want that? Fuck, your knees are so damn weak. 

He stands up and guides your tank top off over your head. He slides the other side of your bra down under your breast, so you’re exposed on both sides. “Can’t have that.” He murmurs, unbuttoning his shirt and taking it off. “You’ll walk through in my shirt.” He says, sliding it up over your arms. It only just barely covers your ass. He buttons it up slowly, testing your strength until he reaches the base of your breasts and stops. 

“Okay, let’s go.” He smirks. 

Fuck. 

He leads you out through the trees and back onto the path back to the dorms. He pulls you next to him, his arm around your waist as you walk. It’s possessive, while at the same time soft, like he can’t get you close enough. His hand cups your ass as you walk, just to remind you how very naked he has you. 

He leans in close, nipping at your earlobe. “Maker, I’m so fucking hard seeing you like this. In just my shirt. I can’t wait to take you apart with everything I have, my mouth, my fingers, my cock.” He moans, squeezing your ass. 

“Poe,” you moan and he chuckles, guiding you through his door. You reach for his shirt as he locks the door but he stops you. 

“Leave it on. Wanna fuck you in it.” He says, sounding wild and out of control. 

“Lights?” You ask, fuck why are you so timid all of a sudden? 

“They stay on. I wanna see every second of this.” He pulls you close, kissing you hard as he guides you back to the bed. He lays you down, finally removing his pants and you lick your lips hungrily at the sight of his hard cock. You wanna taste it properly this time, wanna feel it sliding down your throat as you suck and listen to him moan because of you. 

You reach for it, eyes trained on your prize and he grabs your hands. “Poe, please? Wanna feel you in my mouth.” You look up at him and he groans. 

“I have my own plans that involve you being in my mouth.” He says. 

“Solution. You lay down, me on top. We both get what we want and then you can do anything at all to me.” You promise. “Anything.”

“Fuck. Okay.” He shifts you, laying down flat on his bed. You kick off your boots and let him guide you over his face. “Maker, you’re fucking gorgeous. And wet all for me.” He guides your hips down to his mouth and his tongue swipes slowly over your clit. So soft, slow, sensual, your eyes roll back in your head. 

Your hand wraps around his thick cock, and you lick slowly at the tip, hoping you have the same effect on him that he’s having on you. Your mouth opens wide, sliding over the head and taking him into your mouth. You massage your tongue along the thick shaft, hungry for all of him. He moans loudly against your clit and it feels so fucking good. You suck hard, bobbing your head as far down as it can go, feeling him slide down your throat. 

“Shit, Y/N-“ he chokes, hips bucking slightly. You bob your head slow, stroking him with your tongue, letting him feel every contour as you taste him. 

He’s breathless as he sucks on your clit, making you moan around him. His tongue teases at it, making you quiver, your thighs tremble. His hips buck in time with your head and you reach down, grasping his heavy balls and giving them a gentle squeeze. 

“Fu-fuck!” He gasps, pulling off you. “Y/N!” 

You pull off him and turn around, making your head level with his. “I can’t wait anymore, Poe. I want you inside me.” You whisper, straddling his hips. You grasp his thick cock, rubbing the tip teasingly over your cunt. 

He holds your gaze as you slide down, sinking onto his shaft. Your mouth falls open slightly as he stretches you, and you have to stop halfway to catch your breath. He reaches down, his thumb pressing against your clit and he rubs slowly, teasing you towards an orgasm. 

“That’s it, relax.” He says softly, his voice thick and husky. You moan, your walls fluttering around him. “That’s good. Cum for me. Let me in.” He praises. He presses just right and you clamp down on him, cumming and sinking down further. He moans, continuing to rub your clit until you’re all the way to his base. “Fuck, Y/N.” He moans as your walls roll and flex along him. “You feel so good, like heaven, baby.” He says and you lean forward, changing the angle and dragging along his shaft. 

“I know how we’re spending M-Mondays from now on.” You breathe. 

He guides you down to his chest, wrapping his arms around you tightly. He kisses you hard as he ruts his cock up into you. You whine as you arch your back, taking him deeper. He thrusts hard and deep, feeling your walls cling to him. He grips your hips as he fucks you on top of him, driven crazy by the desperate hold you have on him. 

You pant in his ear, biting his earlobe and sucking on his neck. “Fuck, Poe. You’re so big inside me.” You moan softly, breathlessly. “Better than I ever dreamed.” You praise. “Oh fuck! Poe, gonna make me cum.” You whine. He doesn’t slow down, but he does shift your hips. Now he’s hitting deeper, grinding his perfect fucking cockhead right against your g-spot. 

You gasp, burying your face in his neck as you buck your hips, that fire in your belly spreading. Your moans have turned into high pitched whines, short, desperate, pleading. 

“Never gonna stop fucking you, baby.” He promises and you fall over the edge with a ragged gasp, grinding your hips down hard. Your walls clamp down on his thrusting cock, stroking along his shaft, holding him tight. 

“Stars, P-Poe.” You moan, and he rolls you over. 

“What did you think about earlier? Making yourself cum to get rid of your migraine? What naughty thoughts filled your head?” He asks, pushing in slowly.

“You.” You pant. “It’s always you. Fucking me anywhere you can get your hands on me. In the hangar, the cantina, your ship, my ship, Leia’s office. I can’t get enough of thinking about you taking me, filling me, claiming me.”

He pulls out nearly all the way, watching as your pretty pussy sucks him back in. “Fuck. Can’t wait to fuck you on every surface I can find.” He moans. 

You surge up and kiss him, urging him to fuck you faster. But he doesn’t. He takes his damn time, stroking in and out of you. 

“I’ve waited so long for you to want me.” He moans, laying down on top of you. Most of his weight is supported by his elbows and knees, but you can still feel every inch. You wrap your legs around his hips and that lifts you into him. He moves closer, tucking his thighs under yours, keeping you lifted for him. He doesn’t have far to move, gentle rocking and he’s buried inside you. You cling to his biceps, panting for him as he fucks you slowly. 

He captures your mouth with his, rocking his hips slowly. Your walls flutter and squeeze around him with every slow thrust, your mind slowly dribbling away as he fucks it out if you. His tongue dances in your mouth, tasting you, exploring you, claiming it as his own. 

He’s won, he knows it, now he’s taking all the time he wants to revel in his sweet victory. 

He strokes just right on your clit, filling you to the brim and all you can do is cling to him. Your orgasm crashes on you out of nowhere, rising up and drowning you in bliss. You arch up into him with a cry, clamping down around him and keeping him in place. 

“Good girl. Oh, good fucking girl. That’s it, baby.” He praises, licking along your neck. Your whole body is sensitive, every nerve inside you attuned to pleasure under his touch. 

You tremble under him as he starts to move again. You’ve never felt so small, so in someone else’s control. But if it was going to be anyone’s control, it should be his. His hips rock a little harder, bottoming out with a bump each time and you don’t know how much longer you can hold on. 

“P-Poe.” You beg, holding onto his shoulders. 

His tongue drags up your jaw and over your lips. “Baby, you’re taking my cock so good.” He moans. 

“I need you to fill me, I know you have to cum.” You whimper. 

“I’m not ready yet, sweetheart. You made me wait for so long. Filled my head with your teasing and your body.” He grunts, cock pulsing inside you. “I wanna take my time, making you feel every inch.” He whispers. 

“Fuck, P-Poe. Can you fuck me faster?” You plead. 

“Slow and steady, baby. Gonna fill you all night. You’re never gonna stop cumming on my cock.” He promises. 

He shifts your hips higher so that his cock rubs against your g-spot and you’re seeing stars. Your mouth falls open as he strokes and strokes and strokes, your breathing gets caught in your chest and you cum around him, a trembling mess as you clamp down on his cock. You roll and buck your hips as best you can, trying to get him to cum. 

He grunts, kissing you deeply. “Keep going, love feeling you move under me. So desperate for me.” He pants. 

“What if I promise you can fuck me every day? Before breakfast, after dinner, before a mission, whenever you want?” You try, your cunt squeezing him in anticipation. The thought of him being inside you every day is blanking the rest of your brain. 

“You really want that?” He asks, looking down at you. 

“I want you. Every day, at least twice. Five on Mondays.” 

He rocks into you a little faster now. “Seven.” He bargains and you chuckle. 

“As many times as you want. Just cum now. Fuck me hard. Wake me up by eating me out and we can go again in the morning.” You moan, spreading your legs wider for him. 

“Fuck, pretty girl.” He pulls out and you groan. “Roll over.” He pushes you onto your stomach and lifts your hips in the air. “So fuckin pretty.” He grunts, pushing in fast and hard. 

Fuuuuuck. 

You bury your face in the sheets, hands balling into fists as he sets up a blistering pace. He holds your hips exactly where he needs them, pounding into you fast, hard, and deep. You keep up a constant pressure on his cock, squeezing for all you’re worth. He reaches around, leaning over you as he fingers your clit blindingly fast. 

“Cum for me, baby. One last time. Cum on my cock as I fill you.” He grunts. 

He slams in and your whole body dissolves into atoms, pure, unadulterated bliss as the most intense orgasm you’ve ever had crashes down over you. The only thing keeping you grounded is Poe. He hilts himself to the root inside you, tipping over the edge himself, filling you with his cum. 

“Pretty girl.” He moans, collapsing next to you. You twist into his side, still high in the clouds. He pulls you tight and kisses you all over your face. “Did I hurt you?” He asks. 

You don’t have any energy left for words so you shake your head, lacing your fingers through his. He kisses your fingers, holding them against his lips. “Sorry I made you wait.” You rasp out and he laughs quietly. 

“I’m not. The flirting was fun. This was better.” 

You smile to yourself, tossing your leg over his. “Yeah.”

He mumbles something else, but you’re already drifting off to sleep, happy in his arms.

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[avesblues2]

To think the church is failing in terms of being loving is 1. Not true and 2. A very broad generalization. I'd say too many churches are TOO loving and not enough are speaking the TRUTH. You cannot be just loving and you cannot just be truthful, you have to speak the truth in love. For anyone who thinks calling out sinful behavior, telling someone to repent of their sin, stating they are not representing Christ by identifying their sin (which is literally breaking the third commandment) have clearly never read Acts and saw how the early church handled those who were sinning without repentance, those who rejected Christ and Christians who were not representing God the way they should. Take this scripture below for an example:

“Saul, also known as Paul, was filled with the Holy Spirit, and he looked the sorcerer in the eye. Then he said, “You son of the devil, full of every sort of deceit and fraud, and enemy of all that is good! Will you never stop perverting the true ways of the Lord? Watch now, for the Lord has laid his hand of punishment upon you, and you will be struck blind. You will not see the sunlight for some time.” Instantly mist and darkness came over the man’s eyes, and he began groping around begging for someone to take his hand and lead him.” - Acts of the Apostles‬ ‭13‬:‭9‬-‭11‬ ‭

Or about when Peter boldly speaks to the Jewish council in Jerusalem.

“Then Peter, filled with the Holy Spirit, said to them, “Rulers and elders of our people, are we being questioned today because we’ve done a good deed for a crippled man? Do you want to know how he was healed? Let me clearly state to all of you and to all the people of Israel that he was healed by the powerful name of Jesus Christ the Nazarene, the man you crucified but whom God raised from the dead.” - Acts of the Apostles‬ ‭4‬:‭8‬-‭10‬ ‭

Seriously just read Acts and look at how Paul, Peter and others who journeyed with them handled a culture against God and Christians who were not properly representing Christ and HOW they preached the gospel with BOLDNESS.

Now onto addressing the part about sexual immorality:

While sexual sin is no worse than any other sin because sin is sin and sin = death, it can be a more dangerous sin because “Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.”- 1 Corinthians‬ ‭6‬:‭18‬ ‭NLT‬‬ - NOT to mention in our current culture people believe they cannot overcome this sin, they identify with the sin instead of Christ. If you claim to be a christian but are living in sin, we as Christian's are TOLD to call one another out. We see Paul do this in ALL of his epistles, like hello!? Now the way we treat unbelievers SHOULD BE different than believers, for believers are said to not be blinded but in the light but unbelievers are blinded and in the dark and we must first pray for unbelievers and their blinders are removed and their ears are open or else all that is said to them was said in vain. But even then, Paul is a GREAT example of being bold in faith and speaking truth with having a heart of love and genuinely wanting people to know Christ. Before you correct someone, check your own heart first. If it's coming from a place of superiority you are better off not saying anything at all.

#christian

[mahayanapilgrim]

The Transformative Power of Spiritual Blessings

NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF BLESSINGS

Just as the sun shines upon this world indiscriminately, the compassionate energy of all Buddhas' wisdom permeates all. Wherever you are, whatever you do, this energy is always present, it is always with you.

But just as you must open your eyes to experience the light of the sun, you must open your mind with unwavering devotion to experience the blessings of the Buddha’s energy.

The more your mind opens, the greater the blessings will fuel your mind and propel your practice towards enlightenment.

~ Chamtrul Rinpoche

In the realm of spiritual practice and development, the concept of blessings holds a profound significance. Chamtrul Rinpoche, a revered teacher in the Tibetan Buddhist tradition, elucidates this concept beautifully, drawing a parallel between the omnipresence of the sun's light and the pervasive compassionate energy of all Buddhas. His teachings remind us of the ever-present potential for spiritual growth and enlightenment, emphasizing the necessity of an open heart and mind to fully receive and benefit from these blessings.

Understanding Blessings in a Spiritual Context

Blessings, in many spiritual traditions, are often viewed as gifts of divine grace that support, heal, guide, and protect us on our life's journey. In the context of Buddhism, blessings are not merely external bestowals of good fortune but are profound transmissions of wisdom and compassion from enlightened beings. These are not limited by space or time and can profoundly impact an individual's mind, transforming it towards greater openness, compassion, and wisdom.

The Omnipresent Compassionate Energy

Just as the sun illuminates the world, casting its light without discrimination, the compassionate energy of the Buddhas is omnipresent, reaching every corner of existence. This energy, imbued with profound wisdom and unconditional love, is always available, offering guidance and support to all beings. However, accessing this boundless source of blessings requires an openness of mind—a readiness to receive and integrate this energy into one’s being.

Opening the Mind to Receive Blessings

The analogy of opening one's eyes to experience the sun's light serves as a powerful metaphor for the process of receiving spiritual blessings. Just as closed eyes cannot perceive sunlight, a closed mind cannot receive the wisdom and compassion of the Buddhas. Opening the mind involves cultivating unwavering devotion, mindfulness, and a heartfelt yearning for spiritual growth. It is a process of softening the ego, letting go of rigid beliefs and preconceptions, and developing a profound sense of humility and receptivity.

The Role of Devotion and Practice

Devotion is a key that unlocks the door to receiving blessings. It is not blind faith but a deep, experiential recognition of the enlightened qualities of the Buddhas and the transformative power of their teachings. This devotion is coupled with diligent practice, which includes meditation, ethical conduct, and compassionate actions. Through practice, one not only cultivates the inner conditions necessary for receiving blessings but also deepens their connection with the source of these blessings, making the mind more receptive and pliable.

The Impact of Blessings on the Path to Enlightenment

The blessings of the Buddhas fuel the practitioner's journey towards enlightenment, providing not just inspiration but also direct insight into the nature of reality. These blessings can accelerate the process of inner transformation, helping to dissolve obstacles, illuminate the path, and enhance one’s capacity for wisdom and compassion. The more open the mind, the more profound the impact of these blessings, creating a virtuous cycle of growth and deepening practice.

Conclusion

Chamtrul Rinpoche's teachings on the power of blessings offer a profound perspective on the nature of spiritual practice and development. By opening our minds and hearts to the compassionate energy of the Buddhas, we tap into an inexhaustible source of wisdom and love that can guide us towards enlightenment. This journey requires dedication, devotion, and the continual cultivation of openness, reminding us that the greatest blessings are often found within the depths of our own being, waiting to be discovered and embraced.

#buddha #buddhist #buddhism #dharma #sangha #mahayana #zen #milarepa #tibetan buddhism #thich nhat hanh #blessings