#but anyway pillowfort also seems to not have that many people on it so like. that's literally perfect for me and my avpd

[combatfaerie]

Ficlet: Turbulent

Story: Turbulent Word count: 1,102 Prompt: Pillowfort in an unusual place Also available at: AO3 and Wattpad and dreamwidth Summary: Dean seeks solace in the middle of a flight.

"Hey, Seth." Dean nudged his Shield brother's shoulder. "Can I borrow your hoodie?"

Seth pointed to the next row, where Becky was curled up beside Naomi. "Becky beat you to it," he replied. "She was cold."

"Not that one," Dean insisted, pointing to Seth's covered arms. "That one."

"Why?" Seth looked over and saw that Dean had his own hoodie balled up and stuck behind his head. "What's wrong with yours?"

"I need to build a pillowfort," Dean said irritably. "There's too many people in here."

Here was the first class section of the airplane, and Seth had to admit it was more full than usual for a midweek flight. It was one of the reasons he hadn't minded loaning one of his hoodies to Becky, since he had already been warm, but he caught a chill after taking a quick nap. "A pillowfort?"

Dean made a grabbing motion with his hand. "C'mon, man. I don't have the fancy headphones like you. I need something to block out the noise."

Seth glanced over at Roman, who was sitting between the window and Dean, but Roman was either sleeping deeply or faking it well. He was also hoodieless, Seth noted, and it took him a moment to spot Roman's regular hoodie folded in on itself almost like origami. "Fine," he said at last, "but I need it back before we get off the plane. You know I'm gonna have a hell of a time getting that one back from Becky now." He shrugged out of his second hoodie and tried to ignore the waves of coolness that swept up and down his arms. Come on, Rollins. You usually wear a t-shirt and shorts all day, he told himself. This is nothing.

Dean looked so visibly relieved as he took the hoodie and started folding it that Seth felt bad for even questioning him. Within moments, Dean had the hoodie folded into a makeshift pillow and he nudged Roman, who slowly opened one eye like a dragon roused from hibernation. "What?"

"I've got enough pillows now," Dean proclaimed, pointing to the airline-appointed pillow on his lap, his folded hoodie, and then Seth's. "You said you'd trade if I got enough pillows."

"Fine. I could use the extra leg room anyway." Roman stretched his shoulders out as Dean hopped to his feet and the two Shield brothers switched spots. As Seth watched on, Dean arranged his collection of airplane pillows—somehow he had managed to get an extra one—and borrowed hoodies to form a cushy box around his head. Then he draped a Shield t-shirt over the entire mass and leaned up against the wall of the plane. "We should really just get him some good headphones for Christmas," Roman muttered, stretching out his legs.

"With the way technology is around him?" Seth replied, shaking his head. "The headphones would probably only play ABBA songs or something."

"Serve him right." Then Roman gestured at Seth's bare arms. "How many hoodies do you pack, bro?"

Seth shrugged. "Usually two. Becky's almost always cold, so she's almost always asking to borrow a sweater or something. Mine are definitely big enough for her, so...." He glanced back up at Naomi and Becky, but both women seemed soundly asleep. "And then one for me, but I'm usually warm, so...." He fought the urge to rub his bare arms. I'll warm up eventually, he thought. Glancing down the aisle, he could see one of the beverage carts coming, so at least there was the promise of coffee.

"Uh-huh." Roman had a knowing glint in his eye, but he didn't elaborate. Xavier and Kofi were sitting in front of him and Dean, and when Xavier turned on the light so he could play a video game, Roman adjusted Dean's makeshift curtain shirt before tapping his leg. "Hey, bro. Cart's coming around, but I can't tell if it's food or drinks. Do you want anything?"

Dean stirred a bit. "If it's good, get mine and just put it on the tray. I'll eat later. Don't need a drink."

"Cool." The cart came and went, and Seth and Roman both got coffees. "Becks is gonna be mad that she missed her coffee fix," Roman remarked, setting his coffee down on his tray.

"She can always get one later. Bayley might have got her one; I think they're sitting across from each other," Seth added, trying to get a better look.

The two Shield brothers chatted off and on while Dean dozed fitfully, his feet kicking out often enough that Roman turned and angled his legs into the aisle whenever no one was coming. When the meal cart came around, Roman got a meal for Dean as well, but kept it on his own tray in case Dean woke with a sudden jerk.

It was the scent of chicken that finally woke Dean up, sending his carefully constructed pillowfort tumbling down around him. "Is it good?"

Roman shrugged. "For plane food, yeah." He pulled out Dean's tray and set his meal on it. "How was the pillowfort?"

"It helped," Dean said gruffly. Then he nodded to Seth. "I don't suppose Mister Architect over there knows how to build a good one."

Seth shook his head. "Not that type of architect. Sorry."

"More false advertising from WWE," Dean muttered, setting his collection of pillows and hoodies on the floor. "What's next? You're going to tell me Khali is just mediocre and not actually great?"

Roman shared a look with Seth. "I mean, if you have to ask...."

Dean polished off his meal in record time, handed the meal tray to Roman, and pushed his tray back in. Then he began the elaborate pillowfort-building process again. When his shirt fell to the floor, though, he tapped Roman's leg again. "Cloak me?"

"Yeah. I'm on it." Roman leaned down and grabbed the shirt, shaking it out before draping it over his Shield brother. "All good?"

"Yeah." Dean's voice was muffled by all the fabric. "How much longer is the flight?"

Seth leaned into the aisle to look at the display board at the front. "About two hours?"

"Kick me in an hour or so?" Dean asked.

"Sure." If there was a hint of older-brother malice in the answer, Dean didn't seem to hear it, and after a moment, Roman turned back to Seth. "We're definitely getting him some headphones," Roman declared. "And an all ABBA playlist."

"Make the headphones pink," Seth replied, "and I'll split the cost with you."

"Pink all the way," Roman agreed, "and I'll get Joelle to bling them up with stickers."

"Perfect."

#combatfaerie fic #shield fic

[stevensavage]

Wondering How Long We’ll Care

(This column is posted at www.StevenSavage.com, Steve's Tumblr, and Pillowfort.  Find out more at my newsletter, and all my social media at my linktr.ee)

We’ve got the SAG-AFTRA strike.  Big Studios and groups like Netflix seem to be very interested in replacing real people with AI – and we know they won’t stop no matter the deals made.  Ron Pearlman and Fran Drescher are apparently leading the Butlerian Jihad early.

As studios, writers, and actors battle I find myself caring about the people – but caring far less about the media produced.  There’s so many reasons not to care about Big Media.

You’d think I’d be thrilled to see Star Wars, Marvel Comics, and Star Trek everywhere!  But it’s so many things are omnipresent it sucks the oxygen out of the room.  Even when something is new, it can be overhyped.  If it’s not everywhere, it’s marketed everywhere and I get tired of it all.  Also damn, how much anime is there now?

The threat of AI replacing actors and writers removes that personal connection to actors and writers and creators.  There was already a gap anyway as groups of writers created shows and episodes, abstracting the connections with the creators.  The headlong rush into AI only threatens to make me care less – I can’t go to a convention and shake hands with a computer program or be inspired to write just as good as a program.

We have plenty of content made already anyway.  I could do with a good review of Fellini, maybe rewatch Gravity Falls again, and I recently threatened to watch all of One Piece for inexplicable reasons.  Plus of course I have tons of books.

Finally, there’s all sorts of small creators new and old I should take a look at.  Maybe I don’t need the big names anymore.  Hell, the small creators are easier to connect with.

Meanwhile all of the above complaints are pretty damned petty considering the planet is in a climate crisis and several countries are falling apart politically and economically.  I’m not going to care about your perfect AI show when the sky turns orange because of a forest fire.

I have a gut feel I’m not alone in the possibility of just kind of losing interest in the big mediascape.  We may have different triggers for giving up, but there’s a lot of possible triggers.  Plus, again, potential world crises create all sorts of possibilities.

Maybe that’s why the “Barbenheimer” meme was so joyful, with people discussing these two very different films as a kind of single phenomena.  It was spontaneous, it was silly, it was self-mocking.  Something just arose out of the big mediascape (and two apparently good films), a very human moment it seems we’re all too lacking.

Maybe it’s a reminder we can care about our media.  But it the chaotic times we face in a strange era of media, I wonder if we’ll remember it as a fond exception.

Steven Savage

www.StevenSavage.com

www.InformoTron.com

#sag-aftra #barbenheimer #culture #media #studios #netflix #strikes

[infinitegalahad]

Borhap Boys As Sugar Daddies

(reposted bc it was disappearing from the tags😭)

hey guys!! I wanna apolgoize for the disappearance, school is ✨madness✨ luv. so I've decided to try something new. But I promise I'm working on requests (and a bunch of new ideas). I love all of the borhap boys (bc they are babies🥺) so this might become a little series of head canons! no major warnings, just lots of fluff and some suggestive material. also reader is gender neutral (boy, girl, whatever you what it my dudes!) why not mix my fav trope and boys all in...one fic😳😳 anyways hope you guys enjoy!! I would love some feedback for future reference

Masterlist (requests are welcomed!)

Rami Malek-

Number one that gif of him...need I say more? 🥰

I’m sick of how ya’ll sleep on Rami!! I’m gonna give him tons of love

He would be one of the most affectionate sugar daddy’s tbh

Certainly would spoil the HECK out of you

Whether it be paying off your bills or lavish trips to Greece, Rami always has your back

You never had to pay a SINGLE PENNY when you were around him

Being with Rami, you were a changed person

Your fashion game went UPPPP

Like chanel perfume, all designer clothes, nice handbags, you NAME IT

”Rami, I’m not buying a five hundred dollar shirt from Theory.” ”What do you mean? It would look so good on you, sweetheart.”

Yes, Rami bought you the shirt

You two were at a vinyl place and you saw a limited edition queen vinyl

He buys it (and basically 10+ vinyls you love)

SO RAMI MAKES A WHOLE ASS ROOM IN HIS HOME FOR YOUR VINYLS🥺🥺

This man is omfg i loveee him❣️

Little sneak kisses to your forehead

Seeing you smile as you shop and blush at his complaints makes him so freaking happy HE LOVES YOU SO MUCH

He would take you shopping at the best stores

“I would be fine at a target, y’know” as you look around a Gucci store

Rami would snake an arm around your waist as he cooed into your ear, “My baby deserves the best, and nothing but the best

What started out as an arrangement turned into a genuine relationship

When looking for a sugarbaby, Rami was simply looking for company (and someone to spoil the heck out of)

In all truth, he was simply a lonely guy who simply wanted someone to make happy, and made himself happy in the process

Wherever you guys would go, he would always wanna hold your hand and be close to you bc he’s scared of loosing someone he’s made a connection with

And i’m totally not crying as I write this

Both of you were in dark places when you first met

Rami showed how much he truly cared about you

If you called him all upset, he would SPEED over with whatever you needed whether it be pizza or emotional support

Sitting on your couch, his arm wrapped around yours as you vented about your problems

Rami had convinced you to drop your job and come live with him because he’s a KING!!

”Angel, you’re not gonna have to worry about anymore.” ”What do you mean?”

You ended up quitting your job and moving in with him

What turned into an arrangement became an intimate relationship

The sex between you to was AMAZING

it was VERY intimate

It started off slow but would get increasingly rougher god I hate what I said

Rami would always check up and you and NEVER go past your limits

It would end with the two of you cuddling in bed

Let’s just say you never had to worry about your bills ever again😎😎

I MADE MYSELF CRY WHYYY

Gwilym Lee-

my love for this man? ENDLESS

Seriosuly gwilym lee HAVE MY CHILDERN

anyways to the pLOT

Gwilym is the sexiest and cutest man alive

The sugar daddy that will bring you EVERYWHERE HE GOES

He’s such a gentlemen

Like all relationships start, it was more of an arrangement then a relationship

Your job was to escort Gwilym at all these events as “company”

Gwilym would send a bunch of nice items and a driver to bring you to the location

”Hope you like this ❤️ xxx”   “Treat yourself! 😘xxx”

Like mister I-😳😳

Gwilym is literally such a sweet person

Whenever you were spotted with him, you would get thousands of compliemnts/questions

”You’re with Gwilym! So lucky!”

”That necklace is to kill for! Did Gwilym give it to you?”

”Teach my your ways!”

Whenever you’re at these events all these people give you evil stares

Your like👁👄👁 “is Gwilym a playboy??”

Gwilym is all like “what do you mean?? 🥺Of course not! Your the only one that matters to me right now”

He’s such a king we LOVE HIM

Spontaneous trips to France and Italy

Gwilym and you grow super close

Also your dates would range from fancy galas for Gwilym’s works or peaceful book/poetry readings

He LOVES books and always takes you to bookstores and gives his best recommendations

He literally turns into an english teacher while overanalyzing books

”The greenlight in Green Gatbsy is such a crucial symbol”

”Jane Austen is one of the best feminist writers, she was so ahead of her time!”

You wanna be annoyed but can’t

i can’t I LOVE GWILYM LEE I’M NOT SORRY

The two of you would lie in bed together

You would be slouched against his body as he stroked your hair, reading to you in that accent

As much as you love your gentlemen, you get him into the wacky world of ninety day fiance

”This looks like trash...I’m going to watch every minute of it!”

You guys order chinese food and watch this obsessviely for six hours

I know this is meant to be fluffy but why not add some 🌶

Sex with you and Gwil is like ✨fireworks✨

He would make sure you wouldn’t be able to walk the next day let’s just say😉

He would have to carry you around and kiss your head, saying “You're so adorable, poppet” or “Don’t strain your legs, Cariad!”

Also ceo of AMAZING NICKNAMES

”My anwylyd” (Welsh for dearest)

Would 100% write you romantic poems (over text and in paper)

And yes he WOULD dramatically read them to you😤😤✌🏽

He would always greet you with the most over the top nicknames like “Good morning cariad!” or “Sit there and act pretty, my beloved”

hi mr lee please make me your sugar baby

Gwilym is your sugar daddy but also your sweet, book loving man

He loves seeing you happy so in return, you make him happy💓💓

Joe Mazzello-

This one is a wildcard ladies and gays!! 😌😌

Joe definitely does not strike you as a sugar daddy

He seems more like your boyfriend than anything else

The two of you were inseparable

After dinner Joe would take you to a karaoke bar or for ice cream

After the first date you started calling him Joey

Drunken duets to cheesy 80’s romance songs

The two of you would sing your hearts out before vomiting from the copious ammouts of ice cream and vodka

With Joe it’s eithier mcdonalds or Nobu in TriBeCa

Mr.Mazello has range😌✨

This dude is the ceo of cheesy nicknames

”Yes my little lover muffin!”

”What is it cutie patootie?”

”You look amazing buttercup!”

“What’s up, hot stuff?”

In public he calls you “baby” or “lover” dw he saves you from public embarrassment 

You know that meme of will smith and his wife? That is basically you and Joe

My love for his man is infinite

Joe is super clingy

Hand holding and lots of PDA

He wants people to know that your his sugar baby😤😤💓

he will always send texts like

”miss you baby💓💗💓💗!”

”can you grab milk from the store pls??”

”SUGAR HONEY ICED TEA WHERE ARE YOU😩😩🤯🤯🤯”

”Joe, it’s been a day.”

He has so many photos of you in his camera roll

You are his lockscreen😔💓

The ceo’s of amazing instagram photos, whether it be you wearing a burger king crown at Burger King or You guys kissing on a boat with the Italian sunset on a private boat

Captions would be could “my favorite fairytale is our love story” or “yasss queen slay it!”

It’s cringey but god Joe is so adorable

A combination of a child and gentleman ALL IN ONE

All of his friends are like “you guys HAVE to be dating!’

It’s suppose to be nothing more than an arrangement right?

I mean the two of you were living with eachother and he dropped all of this other sugar babies for you

The two of you are master chefs minus the one time Joe burned mac and cheese and set the stove on fire

Also not to get smutty but the sex between you two? Like

Straight up RAMMING to sweet pillowtalk

Anyways Joe being your sugar daddy would definitely not be a bad thing at all😘

Always exchange those “I love you’s” 💕✨

Ben Hardy-

When first seeing Ben on your sugar daddy app, you were 100% intimidated

But upon meeting him, this tough dude was a PUPPY🥺❣️

On the first date he bought you flowers and gave you a hug

“Y/n, right?”

“That’s me!”

“I just wanted to say you look stunning, love.”

You were wearing jeans and literally smiled so much

You know this date was going to go VERY WELL NOW😩✌🏽✨

Instead of a fancy restaurant, Ben took you to a stroll around London

Whatever clothes you wanted? He got it

Whatever cafe you wanted to stop at? Buy all the tea/coffee and pastries you want

Hotel? Trivago

The two of you walked around the city, hand and hand as you got to know eachother

You ended up walking around the city for five hours up until midnight

You laughed and talked about thousands of things

In confusion, you had to see Ben again

As Ben walked you back to your place, you smiled at him,

”I’d like to do that again.”

”Call me when you want, y/n.”

So your “dates” became more frequent

Ben had the best ideas for dates

Dinners at small Italian places, walking around a museum, or just sitting in his place and watching mindless television

He made sure to spoil you

With gifts, literally and figurreitly

Sex was a large piece in your arrangeemnt

But it was not the only thing in your relationship

And it was!! Amazing!!

”You’re so fucking beautiful” as he would kiss your forehead and dive straight into it 🥺😳

Not only could that man be A BEAST but an absolute sweetheart

Everyday you looked forward to not only getting paid by him, but just talking to him for hours on end

He would stay up for hours just to talk to you, whether it be about your lives or anything

and that ladies and gays is a dedicated MAN

No matter what, Ben always found a way to touch you

He always had his hand on the chair behind you or your thigh

You guys would have pillowforts and nerf fun battles together

It would always end with a cuddle session

Frankie would be skeptcial but love you!!

You guys got so close that he took you on a trip to the greek islands AND PROPOSED!! LIKE!! YES!!😌😌😌

LIKE YES POP OFF MISTER BEN HARDY

#rami malek #joe mazzello #gwilym lee #ben hardy #rami malek x reader #joe mazzello x reader #gwilym lee x reader #ben hardy x reader #my writing #queen #borhap boys #headcanons

[itsyveinthesky]

About 5 years I had a falling out with someone who is also here on tumblr. 

I won’t get into the details but she kept on vague posting about me, spreading rumours. 

I ignored all of that. Shit happens. 

Then the blog stalkings started. First on tumblr. I left my old blog to go to pillowfort. Then on pillowfort. Then the emails came. Had to delete my ao3 too and set up a new one just for bookmarks but without my writings.  I don’t really know if it is her or someone in her friends circle but it has not stopped ever since. Sometimes it is gone for like 2 months and then it is back. In the beginning I also got postcards like 20 every week, then emails. All stuff I could redirect and ignore. By now I moved anyways (not because of that). But this constant keeping taps on me online is so grading.  I can’t use my insta even. Worse many of my tumblr friends have to go through the same shit some are not even on here anymore because of that. 

For a while even my parents got blank calls. Like my parents. WTF is wrong with you people. 

They are using different vpns and IPs, can’t even count how many I have blogged through the years. Sometimes I doubt it is her I often thought that maybe it was some rando who was in our tumblr bubble back then or knew her or me from ao3 and got obsessed and is now haunting a whole bubble of people????? And weirdly enough that makes me feel a bit better. But the signs are too obvious. And I just have no trust in this other person. 

I am going to the police next week they have a department for internet stalking and maybe they have some more advice for me. 

Like to give an idea today alone I had 2800 hits on my main page, always the same comp but different IP. Sometimes it is up to 10 000. 

When I am in a good way I can almost ignore all of that and go “I don’t really care” but I am just so exhausted and annoyed by this situation and there doesn’t seem to be an end in sight. The amount I had to change my emails and passwords to stuff like tumblr and ao3 EVEN THOUGH IT IS COMPLETELY EMPTY MIND you is MINDBLOWING. Every time I am getting a mail that goes something like “an unknown device has accessed your blablabla” I am close to a panic attack. 

 If anyone has any tips, feel free to contact me. 

Sorry I rarely vague blog on main especially when it is this personal but I am just at the end of my rope here. 

Can’t even type in English anymore. 

#personal shit

[shyrose57]

Brothers anon back again. I had a sort of writers block for the last like 2 days which made it really hard to do some questions, but I got em done finally. Sorry about the wait. This one is split between the numbered questions, and next ask is the other questions you asked!

I think I accidentally skipped a question in the last one. I honestly don't completely remember but in case I did skip it by mistake, the groups first travel out of the city's limits and even further beyond in a carriage. When they reach the end of how far the driver is willing to go they then get out and start walking. With Jackie screaming about how their finally going on a adventure. 

1: It thankfully doesn't get to to bad before the others notice. And he immediately told them about Dream, wanting to be very clear with what happened and what they where getting themselves into. But they accepted him anyway and helped him. 

2: Isaac is the leader cause Cletus is too much of a wildcard and too impulsive to lead safely, Charles is too shy to lead, and while Benjamin is perfect for leading he doesnt really like leading and is more of a follower than a leader. But Isaac can joke around and gets along with everyone but also be able to take things seriously and know when something needs to be handled.

5: They do not, they last for a few minutes and unless its a healing or regeneration potion (in which it can take a few days for it to fully go away) they have no long lasting affects. They do know of eachothers past to an extent, they know enough to avoid triggers and enough to know what not to do when around eachother. They know through telling eachother, and they feel awful Grievous and Jackie had to deal with that, but leave it in the past and focus on making their current life better. 

6: Yes and no, while Jackie did mean to throw it at Ran, he ment for it to just hit nearby him, not directly hit him. It was ment to be more of a scare/intimidation tactic than anything else honestly. Grievous's luck is for basically everything, he has won the lottery twice before actually but only those 2 times, he's correctly guessed how many items are in a container more than a few times as well. 

7: I use the height charts and they help mostly for comparison, problem is I have trouble applying it to real world stuff and because of that I still have trouble knowing if something or someone is to tall or short. Jackie can get very mean, like he can make fun of someone who just lost a loved one or experienced a traumatic event at the worst. But he usually doesn't get nearly that mean, most he does normally is making fun of how someone looks or how they do certain things. The others comfort him the best they can when he gets sad, and when he gets mean they either encourage it (Grievous), or discourage it and stop him (Watson. Ran is between either encouraging or discouraging it).

8: He was! He spent most of his life adventuring actually! He misses it somedays now since he lives in Subbin, but he believes giving up his adventuring life for a family and friends who needed him is a more than far trade and would happily pick his family over adventuring again. For around 4 years after Ran left Mizu (including the day he left), Ran traveled everywhere, and learned how to survive himself and taught himself different things, like sewing. Ran has made new socks, fixed clothes, and made blankets for everyone at least once. Watson also designs bows and arrows for show, for top functionality, and for just simple (training) gifts to the others. Ran (and Watson) has visited the nether, though Ran tended to stay in it longer than Watson cause he could withstand the temperatures better. And while digging a new tunnel across the nether he ran into ancient debris, which he then messed with until he figured out to mix it with gold and coat his sword in it. He tried to find more ancient debris but sadly hasn't found any, leaving his sword permanently damaged and at risk of breaking. Jackie isn't good at all at painting, its more of a hobby he's trying out. They try to camp out there at least once a week, where Grievous will sometimes build a pillowfort and either force everyone inside or play a game of capture the fort with them. Sometimes Ran will also read during the pillowfort nights, but not to often. Jackie wants to vist a Snow, Savanna, Jungle,  Tagia, and if possible, a Ice Spike biome. He also wants to vist the nether but he'll have to fight Ran on that. Ran and Jackie's secondary titles are in Javanese!

9: Ran just kinda went "Hey Jackie, stand still for a second." "Ok?" And then he just picked him up and threw up. 

10: When he's first given dinner after already eaten lunch, he just kinda stares at the food. Then asks if they meant to give him food, and when the others say yes, he asks why because he thought people only ate once every few days. His answer shocked the others and they ask him to explain, and he explains futher that he was only allowed to eat and drink once every 3 days. Their horrified by this answer but explain to him how theres 3 meals a day and he can drink whenever, he doesn't believe them at first but eventually accepts it. 

11: When the fishermen first come to Ranbob about their worry, he expresses the same worry as them. But says that it's unlikely Ran will hurt the fishermen specifically, because Rans haunting are already friends with them, and Ran wouldnt risk breaking the friendship unless he deemed it necessary for their safety. 

12: Ranbob is sad that Ran goes to such lengths to avoid him and keep people away from him, but he has resigned himself to it. As he knew that if Ran was alive it was greatly unlikely that he would trust him and knew he would be avoided. Which is actually particularly why he believes Ran will never trust him again and why he views Ran as a kind of lost family member. One he'll never get back no matter what he does.

13: Their first stop is a nearby flower biome, and after that Watson has planned to lead them to a waterfall he found with a shattered Savanna somewhat close to it. They plan to travel for a minimum of 6 months, they can actually travel for as long as they want to, but Prokius made them agree that they must be back before the next General Pit Battles (which happens once every 5 years). 

14: He would 100% run himself into the ground until he's barely alive while searching for them. Benjamin compares Ranbob wanting to go back to Dream, to an abused person wanting to go back to their abusive lover. They believe they've changed and that they truly do love them and want the best for them, but in reality that's not it at all and others have to help them see thats not true and help them save themselves. So it doesn't surprise Benjamin or Isaac that much (it surprises Charles and Cletus though), and after its explained to them, their all more than willing to help Ranbob get over Dream and help him be himself again.

15: Oh definitely. Once they hear the Green-Eyed Enderman is back from hiding they all set out again, and after the group gets attacked and once word spreads that its in a group and there's another enderman with them, they all get targeted. With the Gladiators and Fishermen being targeted as bait or hostages to try to trick the enderman into following a trap. Ran wasnt affected like his brother was. Im talking about trauma and maybe even a bit of PTSD that came from Mizu, caused by Dream. Though both of the brothers have gained different amounts of trauma and PTSD from Dream. I may give the raven to either Watson or Ran, I think its fits both of them really well. I want to have them come across ruins of other Tales but im not sure which ones. Maybe they could find the remains of the Wild West Tale and the Haunted Mansion?

Glad to see you, Brothers Anon, and excited to read!

1: The perfect start to an Adventure. And a funny mental image. Imagining these two groups cramped into carriages is pretty amusing. How ready was everyone to get out by the time they could?

2: The fishermen are really great, and Ranbob is very lucky. I love them.

3: Isaac sounds like he’s a pretty good fit for it then. But nobody’s perfect! What are some flaws of his, leadership-wise?

5: Interesting. What makes Regeneration and Healing last longer? I suppose it’s not relative to the AU, but I am a bit curious. What’s the world’s potions mechanisms, if you don’t mind me asking? And that’s good! They may not know everything, but they know what to avoid, and that’s important. Everyone’s moved forward and are making the best of life, and honestly, that’s pretty cool of them.

6: Welp, Jackie, it seems intimidation tactic failed. However, you have managed to anger Ran, so..there’s that. He won the lottery? Dang. Well, if they ever need money, they can just send him to the nearest casino, I suppose.

7: Aight, so I may have a solution for you there. Whatever height you’re going for, find something in real life that’s just about the same height. Like a tree, or something. Or not, we can always just leave it at short enough to be tossed and tall enough to be the tosser. Jackie sounds like he knows where to hit to make it hurt, honestly. It’s good that they comfort him, though I am curious why they all react as they do to him being mean. Why does Grievous encourage it? And is it more of a depends on the day thing for Ran, or a depends on what was said to Jackie, and what Jackie’s saying thing?

8: Nice! What kind of places did he go? Does he have any particularly interesting knickknacks from that time period? And Ran personally sounds like he knows what he’s doing. Watson’s weapons sound really cool, where did he learn to make them? Is visiting the Nether not a common occurrence these days? Or is it simply that the others never got around to it before? Well, hobbies are always fun to try. Does Jackie keep at it and get better or get bored and try something else? How does Capture the Fort go with these guys, considering they’re gladiators? Why does Jackie want to visit those particular biomes? Is there a reason, or do they just sound cool to him? And why would Ran not want them going to the Nether? Because of the danger?

9: FDXGHJ- He just- tossed him?? No warning?? Oh my gods, I’m dying. How did Jackie react to that? Heck, how did Porkius react to that? I doubt anyone was expecting that display.

10: Oh, no. Now I really want to punch Dream in the face. What the heck, Dream?! He legit asks if they meant to give him food...If one of the fishermen or gladiators doesn’t eventually find a way to punch Dream, I will be forced to travel realities and do it myself. 

11: Kind of sad that Ranbob was equally concerned about it. But hey! He won’t have to be, one day!

12: Poor Ranbob. I hope he’s proven wrong, eventually. Do the fishermen know that he thinks this? If so, how do they feel about it? Or does he kind of just keep those thoughts to himself?

13: Flower biomes are really pretty. What did everyone think about it? Did they bring any flowers with them? So this roadtrip could possibly go on for a few years. Did they leave just after a General Pit Battle, or do they have like, less than five years? Speaking of General, is Jackie still the General in this AU? Does he have extra duties because of it? Or is that not something that happened in this AU?

14: Yikes. Reactions to this? Why does Ranbob believe Dream’s changed, as you put it? Is Dream still able to talk to him, or is it because he just misses being there? So Benjamin and Isaac aren’t all that surprised about it. Do they take the reins in helping out? And how do they all do so? It’s good that they’re helping him though.

15: Well, this sounds like it can’t end well. They try to use the hauntings as bait? Is anyone actually captured? Rescue missions? And alright, that makes a bit more sense. I can see how they’d both be effected differently, and honestly, they’d probably both have very different perspectives of the event, all things considered. Ravens for the win! And it’d be really cool for them to come across the ruins of old Tales buildings. Can you imagine the kind of things they’d find? Diaries, faded photographs, moth-eaten clothes, blood stained floors...Like a walk in the past, but they’ll never know what came to be for the people of that time.

#Brothers AU #dream smp #dream smp au #ranbob #tales from the smp #ran #jackie #watson #grievous #isaac #benjamin #cletus #charles #porkius

[whiterosebrian]

Heritage

I oppose Folkism. I understand Folkism to represent a very ugly parody of the pre-Christian religions that neopagans have been working to revive. I understand neopagan paths to be open. When the old gods call Black or Asian followers, we should let those people answer the gods’ calls.

The reason why I made those statements up-front is that I’m about to delve into a topic whose discussion will require much nuance. I’ve made an effort to write this in such a way as to keep my intentions consistently clear. However, there could still be a possibility of taking many of the following statements out of context, whether by Folkists wanting validation, mainstream people who don’t know much about neopaganism, or Christian-Right propagandists. I’m about to discuss old spiritual heritages of people of European descent.

I may need to touch upon what Folkism is before going on with that discussion. Folkism, in the most basic sense, is the notion that certain old European practices and religions are the sole provinces of their associated cultural groups, whether Celtic or Slavic or, most notoriously, Germanic. It derives from the Volkisch movement which purported to revive Germanic traditions and the people’s connections to their lands. The Thule Society, in particular, laid the groundwork for Nazism. The Nazi regime retained the occultic influences—though I should note they weren’t the dominant strain and the party rose to power by appealing first and foremost to Christian culture (which is yet another historical fact that raises hard questions of what Christianity looks like in the real world).

Today’s adherents of Folkism exploit the discourse around cultural appropriation, though in a mendacious and vulgarized form. Sometimes well-meaning allies do unintentionally vulgarize said discourse as well. One part of appropriation is swiping elements of other people’s cultures willy-nilly—though there are two other key aspects that should be kept in mind. First is the fact that elements of cultures are often taken with little acknowledgement of or gratitude towards the originators. More importantly, there is a context of colonization, marginalization, and erasure.

Even if you haven’t followed me for a while or read my journal entries before, you may be aware of the elements of Asian, African, Native American, and even Jewish spiritualities within the New Age movement. It’s quite clear that a number of people, disenchanted with historic Christian culture for any number of reasons (including extremely serious ones), look elsewhere to find genuine spirituality. Actually, those trends were also present in Europe during the peak of modern imperialism in the nineteenth century, evidently influencing today’s New Age movement.

To my understanding, Buddhists and Hindus are very willing to share elements of their spiritualties—but too often those elements are half-understood, ripped out of context, and watered down anyway. Native Americans have seen their spiritual practices outlawed until fairly recently, which is why they resent those practices being commercialized or taught outside the proper contexts. The Jewish people have faced persecution for many centuries and similarly seen their mysticism suppressed—and they resent mangled or incomplete versions of Kabbalah floating around metaphysical circles.

You may recall the interest that I actually once had in Kabbalah. I did genuinely want to learn from the Jewish people. I had abandoned Catholicism and wanted to learn from its Jewish roots (though I probably underestimated how far Christianity deviated). I was actually ready to start delving more deeply into Kabbalah after reading introductory texts of admittedly varying degrees of quality. I was under the mistaken impression that Kabbalah was now being opened up (though in fact Kabbalah is still considered a closed practice, due mainly to requiring an intensive grounding in Jewish scripture and practice). However, some Jewish users on Tumblr and PillowFort convinced me to rethink my interest. I soon decided that Judaism in general wasn’t for me, much less Jewish mysticism. I didn’t think I could even devote myself to the religious law (however different movements within Judaism interpreted it).

I also had some interest in my own Northern European heritage. That is part of what led me to examine Heathenry in more detail. What finally led me to devote myself to the Heathen path was animism, or a relationship with nature as well as the spirits within and the very powers of life. Sometimes, spiritual practitioners of color heartily exhort white seekers to look into their own ethnic heritages to find their own gods, medicines, rites, and modalities. What ultimately prompted this essay is a video from a healer who goes by “heart of Hamsa” on Instagram; they (I’m using the apparent preferred pronoun) are of Vietnamese and French descent.

They speak of the need for greater respect towards and gratitude for Asian practices. They speak of how they delved into their own heritage. They touch upon the distinctions among cultures and peoples—most certainly not in any exclusionary or purist sense, but in the sense of deepened understanding and appreciation. They speak of a need to give back to the peoples who inspire us, especially in light of colonization, with Vietnam as a prominent example that they cite.

Hamsa goes on to speak of white people who are ashamed or fragile (often understandably, giving rise to the “white guilt” that neo-Nazis maliciously mock) and chase after what they view exotic and foreign, only to fail to do justice to reiki and ayahuasca and the like. They essentially ask people to restart by looking into their own ancestors and uncovering histories. They exhort viewers to set roots and share their own inheritances before looking outside, much less making smorgasbords. Basically, Hamsa asks people to remember who they are and be themselves first and foremost.

How does that apply to a man of Northern European descent born on a land that was stolen from indigenous people? Occasional tweeters will remark that white people have no culture except for banal capitalism and arrogant colonization. Irish, Italian, and German immigrants eventually assimilated into the hegemonic American culture after facing their share of prejudice (my father’s family actually used to be named Koch before becoming Cook during the First World War). The old Christendom may have initially been a union of different Christianized peoples, but at some point (I can’t say exactly when) it became a more-or-less homogenized bloc of Christian colonizers. If even the Irish faced domination at the hands of Englishmen, the Christian European powers were sure to dominate other peoples in worse ways.

Hamsa does speak of “blood” and “bloodline”, which admittedly can raise hackles for good reason. Folkish neopagans also speak of “blood” as in “blood and soil”. Obviously, as you can see from the above context, Hamsa is using “blood” in a subtly though crucially different way. Perhaps, then, Folkism is a distortion of a truth—that truth being a rootedness in personal bloodline and heritage. The kind of “meta-genetics” that people like Stephen McNallen and Stephen Flowers promote is indeed Nazi-leaning bunk—otherwise, learning about the pre-Christian past would not be so difficult or involve so much ambiguity and guesswork. I can accept that white supremacy has influenced the pagan revival to some extent, particularly in its early stages. Did the original Volkisch movement deal with the trauma of enforced Christianization (and the later rise of an increasingly ruthless capitalism) in a very unhealthy way? I don’t have enough historical education to really answer that.

In any case, I’m very pleased to see neopagans seriously work on disentangling that influence. Improved historical scholarship in recent times has been a blessing. Perhaps European-Americans who take the time to learn from such scholarship as well as experienced practitioners might find many boons. It’s possible that the old gods of Northern Europe called me back into their embrace. Indeed, as I began to seriously consider training myself to be a magician working with Odin and Freya, I began to get a sense of a homecoming. My Scandinavian, German blood, and Anglo-Saxon bloodlines ultimately aren’t major factors, but they still are factors in a homecoming. While figuring out a spiritual path, I increasingly wanted to work with divine power as a magician—it turned out that I wouldn’t do so through Kabbalah but through animistic Heathenry.

The question of what a settler is supposed to do among the many settler communities on a continent stolen from its original inhabitants remains. I most certainly have a responsibility to those who lack what privileges I have. I hope to find stronger opportunities to aid the indigenous communities, especially those within the Great Lakes, the region of Turtle Island where I live. For that matter, I hope to find stronger opportunities to aid other communities.

In general, I understand a need to participate in the work of decolonization in some manner. I understand a need to take part in breaking down what has become whiteness. Those who think that they are being broad-minded in taking from so many cultures (and I would have also thought so even a few years ago), it seems, unintentionally contribute to colonization and white privilege. Maybe I will start learning from other peoples after gaining a very firm grounding in a revived Germanic magic, though maybe they will tell me to keep up with that. There are indeed many different paths for people to take to the divine. Some of them are closed (or at least require formal initiation) for very good reasons. Kabbalists and Jewish mages deny that Judaism is for everyone—they might speak of other gods who call to their peoples while the presence of the supreme Godhead remains with the gentiles. People like Hamsa speak of honoring and reinvigorating diversity among the human shards of divinity within today’s world. Thus, demagogues who fearmonger over the One World Religion for the New World Order show themselves to be paranoid fools. There certainly isn’t a Jewish conspiracy to take over the world!

I will take my time in building relations with Freya and Odin, contemplating the runes, training myself to connect to Yggdrasil, and looking forward to meeting elves and various ancestors who have walked my path before. I hope to be of great service as a Germanic magician among the Great Lakes. I also wish to gradually build up stories of diverse people seeking truth, goodness, beauty, joy, and spirituality as a novelist (and possible comic artist). I struggle with lethargy and a troubled heart, but I do believe that I have a calling. You are all welcome to support me and, perhaps better, find your own mystic paths.

#spirituality #cultural appreciation #paganism #heathen #pagan #long text post #mysticism #social justice #colonization #religion #magic #text post #personal essay #writing

[radramblog]

Every Boros Commander, Part 1

Every one of these rambles is going to be longer and nerdier than the last, I guess. We’ll see how long I can keep that up for.

If you aren’t or haven’t been at least a casual fan of Magic: The Gathering, this post is going to be completely lost on you, sorry.

Oh also I’m having to split this in half since it took basically all afternoon to write and its still juuuust not done.

Boros gets a lot of shit for being bad and having bad generals for EDH until recently, and seeing as its my favourite two-colour pair I felt like exploring, well, every option we have for the combo. I’m excluding the new Commander Legends partner commanders in this, since I don’t have all day, and I’m also not covering Akiri and Bruse Tarl since no-one ever builds just Boros with them, and I’m not including 3-5 colour decks that just happen to have red and white in them. That’s not Boros.

Boros’s strengths are in manipulating combat, in tokens, and with Voltron strategies. It is the best pair for Equipment decks and top tier for Aggressive decks, to the point of being arguably shoehorned by WOTC into such strategies for a long time. Its weaknesses are mostly to do with card draw and ramp, possibly the most important things in a casual game of Commander, but the former is alleviated by many of red’s recent card draw options and the latter easily supplemented with mana rocks- if you have enough money, any deck can have good ramp, but enough budget options exist these days that it isn’t too bad even for the “worst colors”.

Anyway, enough beating around the bush lets get into this. Going in Chronological order.

Agrus Kos, Wojek Veteran (29th most played as of writing)

…It seriously took until Ravnica to get a legendary RW creature? Heinous. Cool as Agrus is as protagonist of the Ravnica novel, his card simply does not hold up in 2021, let alone beforehand. He’s a Glorious Anthem style commander, except he works best only with creatures that are both red and white, and not nearly enough cards produce multicolored tokens for him to boost. Oh, also he’s a 5 mana 3/3 with no protection or evasion that has to attack to get his effect. Save it for the novel.

Razia, Boros Archangel (30th most played as of writing, the last place finalist)

Speaking of Ravnica. Razia is fucking cool, between the art and unique, if underwhelming, activated ability. She is also 8 mana and not green. She is the only commander to my knowledge that can redirect damage to opponents’s creatures, so if that’s the deck you want to build, go for it, though enjoy the distressingly small cardpool. God, they couldn’t have given her an extra power, could they?

Brion Stoutarm (6th most played as of writing)

Brion is the first actually viable commander of the bunch, being a pretty decent head to either a Fling deck with Ball Lightnings or Acts of Treason, or just Giant Tribal with his Lorwyn compatriots. I don’t think I’ve ever seen or played against Brion yet, but I’d be interested in doing so. Having lifegain in the command zone with a deck that likes throwing damage around is pretty nice. It’s surprising that he’s still so high, especially considering EDHREC (my data source) only now pulls from the last 2 years of decks, but I’m certainly not sad to see him there.

Jor Kadeen, the Prevailer (19th most played as of writing)

Spoilers: Jor is actually the best Anthem commander. +3/+0 is huge, and when most of your ramp and some of your draw is artifacts you’re not going to have a hard time getting metalcraft. 5 mana is a fair chunk for an aggressive deck but he turns the damage output up enough notches that I think he’s pretty good. Underrated in my opinion. How are there more Tajic, Legion’s Edge decks than Jor Kadeen decks?

Basandra, Battle Seraph (24th most played as of writing)

Basandra is the head of my current Boros deck, being a pillowfort/combat manipulation deck. She’s, uh, not ideal in that even, since she stops even you from casting removal and such during combat. Having an extra must attack effect in the zone is nice, though, and a flying commander can be nice for closing games out. Basandra at least has the gift of being fairly open-ended, but also, she doesn’t really do anything, so that’s probably got something to do with it.

On a side note, fuck you Terese Nielsen for turning out to be a cunt. No-one else seems to have drawn this character, so I can’t even make an alter. Fuck.

Gisela, Blade of Goldnight (10th most played as of writing)

Gisela has a lot of very attractive words on her. Unfortunately, 7 mana and that ability means that as soon as you drop her out of the zone, you better use her quick because she isn’t sticking around long. Obviously lends herself to group slug or Earthquake decks, but the former paints an even bigger target on your head and the latter is even mana hungrier than normal. I prefer her in the 99.

Aurelia, the Warleader (5th most played as of writing)

Aurelia was the “best” Boros commander for a long time, and it’s easy to see why- haste and an extra combat trigger add up to a lot of damage very quickly and it’s not like there was much competition for a while. She’s actually the only one of the top 5 Boros commanders that wasn’t printed in the last 5 years, so I guess she’s stood the test of time, much like Brion.  I’d argue she’s pretty boring though, seeing as she has the one thing she does, but she does it well and there’s no faulting her for that. She’s the closest we have to r/custommagic’s favourite “double combat triggers” legend. A lot of people seem to run her as Angel Tribal too, which of the available Angels in the zone I’d argue that’s a pretty good shout. The Red/Boros Angels are fun!

Tajic, Blade of the Legion (20th most played as of writing)

The first on this list I’d consider playing as Voltron, Tajic’s first card is indestructible which as a former Sapling of Colfenor player is fucking excellent in the zone for when you have to play defensively. He does, however, require other creatures in the deck to truly shine, and you do have to have those creatures attack, so it can be awkward to get the most out of him. He’s a cool dude though, much better than his other card imo.

Anax and Cymede (23rd most played as of writing)

The first draft I ever played was a Born of the Gods draft in which I splashed Anax and Cymede. Clearly, I had no idea what I was doing. Anax and Cymede look a lot like Tajic in deck, to be honest, since they’re creatures that like having buffs but also want other creatures around to benefit. Heroic is kind of an awkward requirement, however, and I suspect you’d be spending more time just having it as a buff for the royals themselves. Its nice to see a loving married couple as a Magic card, though, I’m sure things will be good for them always.

Iroas, God of Victory (9th most played as of writing)

Somehow despite it being common in the 99 of aggressive decks, I don’t think I’ve ever seen an Iroas deck in my local metas. I think it has the potential to be pretty powerful, since if you can meet his (admittedly harsh) requirement he’s an indestructible evasive commander with that magical 7 power making commander damage a 3HKO. And when he’s not ready to rumble, he’s nigh impossible to kill on account of the limited targeted enchantment exile people tend to play in the format. Otherwise, he makes attacking free and bountiful for other creatures, and so is just kinda good to have around- I can see running him for that alone.

Munda, Ambush Leader (27th most played as of writing)

Somehow more people are playing Munda than Razia or Agrus, despite being just the worst commander with Ally in the text (outside the type line, love you Zada) and not doing actual anything outside of that. Why the fuck doesn’t he draw the cards? Why does he just stack them? God, Munda sucks. Also I have like 3 of them, since I drafted a lot of that deck in that environment and people just pass him around. Anyone want one? Be my guest.

Kalemne, Disciple of Iroas (11th most played as of writing)

Precon face commanders always get a bit more love and a bit more power than the average legend, and Kalemne is no exception. Double Strike in the zone on a creature that gets bigger is just nuts, and it means she kills people astonishingly quickly. Even my non-voltron Kalemne deck that just wanted to play big idiots had her as a huge threat since even if she gets killed she stays big. Kalemne also happens to be probably better for Giant tribal than Brion, though he does at least get to yeet those removal magnets if they do get removed.

Anya, Merciless Angel (26th most played as of writing)

I didn’t think Anya would be this low. While she is another indestructible commander, it is conditional, and her abilities are self-sabotaging- if someone is in range of being killed by her, you’re probably not going to want to attack them just so you can keep indestructible and buffs, but you also, yknow, want to kill them. I can see her being political in this way though- keeping someone alive with her swords at their throat can have some fun implications. I think shes underrated despite her awkwardness.

Archangel Avacyn (14th most played as of writing)

(Her colour identity is RW since her other face is a red creature. It’s a bit odd, I know)

Avacyn was fucking unbeatable in draft and obnoxious in Standard (though one of my favourite magic stories involves her, so,), and since I never managed to get one for Kalemne when that deck was around I have no real love for her. She’s generically powerful without leading in a particular direction, but her flip ability is pretty cool as is her story in the set. It’s OK. Also why do people keep putting her in Angel decks? You know she doesn’t flip off those, right?

Adriana, Captain of the Guard (22nd most played as of writing)

Adriana, Adriana. I didn’t dislike Adriana as much as I did until I actually did the math on her. Typical commander games are 4-player, so she is a +3/+3 anthem at maximum assuming you have good attacks on every single opponent and that none of them are dead yet. I’m really not sure why you’d play this over Jor Kadeen, and it looks like people aren’t, so. Melee was a fun mechanic in draft, but I completely understand why it hasn’t crossed over, ever, to other formats, seeing as there are 7 total cards with it and most of them are draft chaff. CONTINUED IN PART 2...ANOTHER DAY. PROBABLY SOON SINCE IT’S 2/3 DONE ALREADY.

#mtg #commander #edh #ramble #boros #fuck you adriana

[redbeardace]

August TAAAP Chat Notes:  Activism

This is a scattered bunch of thoughts and notes on some of the things that were discussed about activism in the August TAAAP Pride Chats.  There’s no solid thesis here, but maybe a few conversation starters.  Some of what’s here is a post-chat thought and wasn’t even discussed at all.  This should also be taken as incomplete and not a full overview of what was discussed.  (Notably, it doesn’t include much of what went on in the voice chats.)

[Cross-posted from Pillowfort.]

For starters, activism wasn’t really one of the official topics.  This mostly came from my hijacking of the Carnival of Aces channel and it’s topic of “What would you like to get out of the ace community?”, because my main answer to that question is “More Active-ism”.

How do we “activate” activists?  How do we get more people working on more things, so there’s a large pool of people doing a large number of varied things, instead of a relatively small number of people who rapidly get burnt out because of the weight they’re carrying?

One of the more frequent blockers is that people don’t feel that they’re “important” enough to do activist work.  They feel like there’s a “You must be this popular to ride” sign at the gate, and they don’t qualify because they don’t have a popular blog or YouTube channel.  But for the most part, it’s actually the inverse relationship.  Some people get popular because they’re doing the activist work, not the other way around.  And some of the most important people doing the activist work aren’t “popular” at all.  And they’re happy about that.

It’s hard to know how to get involved.  Another common thread was that people didn’t know how to get involved.  There are groups out there who frequently look for volunteers (AO, TAAAP, AUREA, Asexual Agenda) and new projects come along periodically who need people, but it seems like those aren’t as effective as they can be.  What can groups like that do to both increase their reach and make it clear that “Yes, we want YOU”?

Should we throw an activism fair?  We should throw an activism fair.  Who wants to get that set up?  How about you?

What is activism, anyway?  I think everyone just assumes this means you have to be David Jay or Yasmin Benoit, which is not the case at all.  Activism takes many, many, many forms.  Most of which are not “public face” type roles.  The Ace Census needed programmers.  TAAAP needed people to write a book.  Local meetup groups need someone who knows a good karaoke bar and wants to host a meetup there every month.  Some groups need a Discord mod.  Other projects can’t go anywhere without a professional in that field providing a guiding hand, such as a therapist to help with a continuing education seminar, a teacher to help with inclusion in a sex ed curriculum, or a lobbyist to work on legislative issues.

Activism is online.  Activism is offline.

Activism is big.  Activism is small.

Activism is local.  Activism is global.

Activism is old.  Activism is young.

Activism is a lot of things, and you can probably find a place to fit.

Don’t ask for permission.  Just do.  There’s no Ace/Aro Elder Council that approves activist efforts.  Pretty much every project you see was just started by someone who wanted to do something.  So if you want to do something, do it.  You have to operate on the assumption that if you won’t no one will.

Don’t go it alone, if possible.  Try to get others to help out.  Join forces with other people already doing similar things.  Volunteer with an existing organization.  Tell people what you’re doing.  Reach out for advice.

People want meetups.  If there’s no local group in your area, are you able to start one?  If there is a group in your area, are you able to try hosting a new meetup that’s relevant to your interest or closer to your location?

Where possible, the meetups should have cake or garlic bread.  Cake and garlic bread together might be a bad idea.

You can even host online meetups, which can have a wider reach than physical space ones.

More activists will overwhelm the Hate Brigade.  A lot of people avoid activism because anyone who pokes their head up tends to get attacked by a parade of assholes.  But if we have more activists, they won’t be able to keep up.

Harness the power of Discord.  Discord seems to be popular these days.  There are a bunch of aro and ace discords, but how many of them encourage activism?  Anyone want to take on organizing and mobilizing people on various Discord servers?  Anyone with a Discord server have an activism channel?

Why did activists become activists?  Some to fight for visibility.  Some out of spite.  What about you?

How do we get activists connected with other activists and proto-activists?  Central site?  List serv?  There’s a Facebook group and rumors of Discord.  What else?

It’s Too Hard™.  The apparent difficulty level of many things discourages people from trying.  It’s Too Hard™ to start a meetup group.  It’s Too Hard™ to march in Pride.  It’s Too Hard™ to write a book.  It’s Too Hard™ to change a law.  We need to overcome that perception.  Change it from It’s Too Hard™, so I won’t, to It’s Too Hard™, so I must.  And honestly, a lot of things aren’t very hard.  Like, marching in a parade seems like a big scary thing, but it’s pretty much just pay the registration fee and show up with a bunch of people and a few flags and walk a mile.  It doesn’t have to be more involved than that.  And starting a new meetup is basically saying “I’m going to be here, doing this, at this time”, and maybe other people will show up.

Don’t let failure stop you.  Don’t let the fear of failure stop you.  Not everything works out.  Big deal.  If you try something and it doesn’t work out, you’ve learned more about what to do for next time.

Support each other.  Support can include clicking the little heart or thumbs up thingy, offering feedback, signal boosting, joining up and getting involved, forking over cash, connecting people with similar interests, or pointing at related things.

What’s the appropriate level of inclusion/breadth of scope, and where does it become too broad/out of scope?  There is a lot of overlap between aro activism and ace activism, and in a lot of cases, it makes sense for it to be combined into a single package.  But what about cases where there’s conflicting needs?  Where is it appropriate to say “No, this thing is specifically about aces” or “specifically about aros” or whatever?  And how do you establish that boundary?  And not just aro/ace, but also gender, geography, race, religion, etc...  How can you tell when specificity is needed and just staying on topic vs. exculsionary erasure?

#asexual #asexuality #ace activism

[pomrania]

Fantasy space

Spelljammer is a cool setting. Unfortunately, it was first written in 1989, for 2E D&D. I'm not going to require anyone to read old sourcebooks, even if they're really cool once you remove the old-edition-mechanics from them, so here's an overall summary of how it works. Additionally, there were some things I didn't like in "official" Spelljammer (like clerics not being to regain higher-level spells in a different crystal sphere), so it just makes sense to write out my version of things. (To clarify: everything I put here is consistent with “official” Spelljammer, to the best of my knowledge. If there is something I didn’t like, then I simply did not include it. There are also other things which I did like, but I did not include here because they were too specific for a general overview, or because I forgot.)

1. Fantasy space follows different rules than real-world space

We're not playing a sci-fi game, we're playing a fantasy game, after all. I'm putting in a brief summary of everything here, so hopefully it will make sense. Further sections give more details.

Planets happen inside wildspace, which is kind of like space-space but it isn't a vacuum. Each planetary system, with its planets and wildspace, is encased in a crystal sphere. The various crystal spheres are surrounded by the Flow, which is flammable and also prevents dimensional travel.

When in wildspace or the Flow, everything has its own air envelope; the air inside this will not vanish, but it will get used up and go bad. The larger the thing, the larger the air envelope. Large enough things have their own gravity, and the effects of its gravity reach as far as its air envelope.

2. Wildspace

Wildspace is what you get between planets. There is very little there, other than asteroids (which may or may not be inhabited), other ships, and wreckage (which may or may not have already been picked over). Most space travel happens in wildspace, because the things to travel between are closer together.

You will not die from imploding if you are thrown unprotected into wildspace. You will however probably die from suffocation once all your air has gone bad, since wildspace does not have atmosphere, but you will have some time to be rescued or find air before that happens.

3. Crystal spheres

A crystal sphere contains a planetary system. Inside of it are planets and wildspace; outside of it is the Flow.

The shell of a crystal sphere cannot be damaged by any known means. If you want to get through it, you need an opening. These openings happen naturally, and they seem to be at random. If you do not want to wait until an opening happens nearby, you can use magic to make an opening happen where you are. Sometimes this magic is built into a ship, but that makes the ship more expensive.

4. Phlogiston / the Flow

(The "proper" name is "phlogiston", but I'm going to call it "the Flow" because a) that's easier to write, b) it is synonymous in the sourcebooks, and c) I don't know how to pronounce "phlogiston".)

The Flow is what you get between different crystal spheres. It is luminous and rainbow-coloured, and also extremely flammable. If you light a fire while your ship is in the Flow, you're going to have a bad time. If you light a big fire while your ship is in the Flow, like if you're trying to cast Fireball, you are going to have a very bad time. Even if you're fireproof, and if your ship is made of things that don't catch on fire, chances are that your friends and your cargo are not also fireproof.

The Flow provides as much light as an overcast day. This is good because if you need to see, you do not want to light a candle or a torch if you enjoy not being on fire.

The Flow prevents any dimensional travel or access. If you have a Bag of Holding, you will not be able to access its contents while your ship is in the Flow. You will not be able to teleport, go ethereal, or summon creatures from other planes.

The Flow can preserve things. If you run out of breathable air while in the Flow, you go into suspended animation, and then wake back up once you have proper air. This preservation only lasts while in the Flow. Sometimes there are ships floating around in the Flow, where all the ship's air has gone bad, and everybody on board is in suspended animation. They could be there for days or months or years or decades, and nothing would change for them. If you have to be thrown off your ship and left adrift, try to have it happen while in the Flow. You will start to suffocate as your air runs out, but it will not kill you.

The Flow has its own currents. If you know them well, or are lucky, you can arrive somewhere faster than anticipated. If you make a mistake, or are unlucky, it could take you a very long time to arrive.

5. Gravity planes

If something is large enough then it will have its own gravity. "Large enough" in fantasy space is significantly smaller than you might think. Gravity points "down", instead of "towards the centre" (unless you are dealing with a spherical planet).

The larger something is, the farther its gravity will reach. If two different large objects come close enough that their gravity fields interact, then the gravity angle of the smaller object will change to match the gravity of the larger object. This can be extremely inconvenient if the two objects are ships, you're in the smaller ship, and "down" is now "sideways" and everything has fallen all over the place. Because of this, if two ships come near each other, the smaller one will generally turn so that its "down" is pointed in the same direction as the larger ship's "down".

Gravity in fantasy space is a yes-or-no kind of thing. You are either within something's gravity field, or you are weightless.

6. Air envelopes

The larger something is, the more air it carries with it. If you go in space just with your own body, you will have enough air along to survive for a little while, but not for as long as you would probably like. If you go into space with a large object like a ship, there will be a lot more air.

The air around something is called its air envelope. The size of an air envelope is the same as the size of its area of gravity, if it has a gravity field. If you can fall, then there is air available, even if that air might have gone bad. Things that are too small to have gravity still have an air envelope, but it is smaller than the air envelope of something that is large enough to have gravity.

When you breathe, you use the air in the air envelope which you are in. If the air envelope is small, then you will run out of usable air sooner than you would like. If the air envelope is large, then it will not be a problem for a long time. A ship generally has enough air to last its crew and passengers for a couple weeks or months, depending. If there are more people in an air envelope, the air will go bad faster. If there is a fire in an air envelope, the air will go bad faster.

There are ways to keep the air fresh for longer, some of which are plants and some of which are magic. It is possible to have it so that the air never needs to be replaced, but usually something goes wrong along the way.

7. Ships that travel space

"Officially" they're called spelljammers, but I just call them "ships".

a) Helms

Space is large [citation needed]. Normal ways of getting from one place to another, even very fast ways, are impractically slow when it comes to travelling in space. There are several ways of powering a ship fast enough to make space travel feasible, but helms are by far the most common. A helm gets a ship to go fast and also gets it to go where you direct it to go (which might not always be where you want it to go, but that is why navigators are a thing).

A helm is a chair with ship-go-fast magic added to it. It can be transferred between ships, which is good because it is expensive. In order to use a helm, a spellcaster sits in that chair, and that both powers the ship, and lets the spellcaster mentally direct the ship what to do. This uses up their magical energy for the day. A spellcaster can only helm a ship if they're full up on magical energy before they start.

Helms are designed so that a ship will automatically slow down from space-travel-fast when it approaches something large enough that it would hurt if they collided. You can still run into things, but it will be at a speed where you have time to try and move somewhere else if you want.

b) Ship varieties

There are many different types of ships in space. Some of them aren't able to go space-travel-fast. These are mostly used to go short distances, like to transport stuff between big ships and places where the big ships can't land, or for space combat, when nobody can go space-travel-fast anyways. These are generally smaller ships that are more agile, but they can also be larger ships where someone didn't or couldn't put in a helm.

Many ships in space look like a cross between a water-ship and a fish or insect. This is because that is cool. There is almost always an open deck, since air won't escape the envelope, so there's no reason to close everything in.

These are a couple of different things people might want in their ship, which is why there are so many different designs:

more storage space

more agile

harder to damage

more weapons

needs fewer people to crew it

able to fit into more places

able to land on ground or water

fits someone's standards of a good-looking ship

easier to repair

costs less money

((Black lives matter, and trans rights are human rights.))

((Also posted on Pillowfort, here.))

#gaming #original content #not a reblog

[snarp]

Pillowfort Problems

From https://www.pillowfort.social/posts/2040132 :

community posted to BetaUsers:

Bug investigation

This is what has been found so far by me and some people I know. We found this very quickly and mostly aren't web experts, which makes me think it's very likely that someone with more expertise could find actual security holes that are worse than "you can dm someone an image that logs them out".

1. can sign up with usernames that are api endpoints - seems to only break things for the user with that username as far as I can see

2. can embed urls in img src - allows signing out users who view the image, easily breaks the site for people but doesn't reveal any information as far as I can tell

3. can embed javascript in img src onerror tag - the javascript is only prevented from execution on client side, this seems concerning

4. it looks like the donate page is a custom one, which means it is likely to also be full of security holes. the payment form is submitted to the pillowfort servers and not a 3rd party provider. if you made a payment through this page I cannot recommend strongly enough that you call your bank and cancel whatever card you use. I'm not going to go poking around with the payment forms because that puts me at legal risk but given how many other bugs are in the site I would really, really not trust the payment form.

Last edited 2 hours ago.

Comments with further vulnerabilities:

communities left a comment 1 hour ago:

5) there doesn't seem to be any limit on post size.  if you load up a page with a crapload of text - like, say, War and Peace - the site crawls to a halt while it downloads a massive 5+ mb uncached JSON file before displaying anything.

community left a comment 57 minutes ago:

oh also posts are sequentially numbered, which would make it very easy for someone to trawl all public posts with a script (this is what happened to parler)

community left a comment 55 minutes ago:

flagging posts for community moderators doesn't work, if you moderate a community you can't see any flags that have been reported

Azpher-Omega left a comment 33 minutes ago:

I just saw and resolved some flags on mine? It sure looked like I did anyway

community left a comment 31 minutes ago:

hmm maybe it's something to do with my having a broken username then

communities left a comment 13 minutes ago:

How to get back a deleted conversation:

1. Delete a convo with the trash can (top right)

2. it disappears from your messages list

3. In the URL field, put in the URL of the deleted conversation (e.g. https://www.pillowfort.social/messages/72074)

It shows up as a "conversation" with no messages

Make a reply

Et voila, the conversation has returned from the abyss

Conversation / message IDs are also sequential.  This seems bad.

(Though, it appears to make sure that you were a participant and gives a 401 Forbidden error if not.  Can't read others' messages, thankfully!)

You might want to review GDPR rules and see if "mark as not visible" really qualifies as "deleted from the server"... I suspect it does not.

communities left a comment 11 minutes ago:

Aside: it's possible to "reply" to a message that isn't the main message of the conversation, by specifying its URL.  This creates a detached conversation that does not appear in the messages at all.

So for example if you send a message and it has ID 1, then a reply with ID 2, then change the URL to begin from ID 2, you can make replies that are "unlinked" from the main conversation.

#pillowfort #pillowfort social #pillowfort io #coding

[argentdandelion]

Ways to Salvage the Dragon Egg Princess With a Sequel

(Originally posted on Pillowfort two weeks ago.)

In a previous analysis post on The Dragon Egg Princess, it was made clear how messed-up Koko's identity conflict was. Koko was raised as a human princess, but later discovered she had hatched from a dragon egg, was the last of the dragons, and was now expected to become "a dragon". Supposedly, she had to become "a dragon", including assuming dragon form, because it was her true self or "destiny". The book's conclusion, given its build-up, was unsatisfying and only made sense if there was off-screen child abuse forcing Koko into a particular identity.

However, The Dragon Egg Princess can still be salvaged with a better-executed sequel.

--

----

A Few Book Flaws

Remauld (Koko's magic teacher) and the namushin (forest spirits), as my analysis makes clear, are one of two things: some variety of “misguided” or “overzealous”, possibly blended with obliviousness or patronizing attitudes, or simply...immoral.

Some of the flaws of the previous book are how neither the namushin nor Remauld are ever acknowledged as bad or flawed in any way. In fact, not one person even dislikes them. Secondarily, the namushin (including their magic council representative, Zaki) and Remauld have pretty flat characterization and motives, a likely casualty of the book having too many characters and too little time to develop characters that would logically be better-developed or important. Most of Remauld's characterization is "wise magic teacher who admires dragons and pushes Koko into her "destiny"". The namushin are simply "kind, helpful forest spirits popular among humans that have a habit of simply appearing on the scene", and are so underdeveloped one never even sees their direct dialogue.

Furthermore, Koko's whole pressure to assume her "destiny" as a dragon, "represent" dragons, and be the princess of dragons seems pointless when she's the only one left. Dragon culture exists only as a fossil, so who would acculturate her? Who would she rule over?

----

The Bad Guys

Due to their questionable motives and ways of going about them, Remauld and/or the namushin could be perfect antagonists for a sequel, and the new role would theoretically help develop their personalities. Luzee, the evil fairy antagonist of the first book, isn't exactly a fleshed-out "round character", but even she has more characterization than most of the good guys, exempting the protagonist, Jiho, Koko, and arguably the bandit leader Micah (who felt largely superfluous to the book, anyway).

Namushin

The cataclysmic war which ended in the death of all dragons (barring Koko) was initially caused by humans being afraid of supernatural creatures (including dragons) and attacking them, and Luzee secretly stoking their fears to gain more power. Koko outright mentions, just once, the cause of the first war as one reason people might not want to be a dragon. Based on this, and the fact over nations don’t have big magic forests like Joson (fantasy-Korea, basically) and have very little if any magic or magical places left, the Namushin could have a motive to attack humanity.

Although one could write them as wanting to kill all or most of humanity, the most internally consistent motive is wanting to kill those people of other nations who haven’t been incorporated into the Nackwon’s armies and are associated, even loosely, with the destruction of magical areas. Or, they merely want to restore the magic forests of the other nations, at all costs, as quickly as possible, with no care for what humans suffer and die in the process. (the spirits and spirit vines from The Legend of Korra could be a good parallel.)

They might want Koko because dragon magic could uniquely accelerate the process, or Koko would be useful to scare off their human enemies, and they believe they have Koko’s loyalty.

It’s mentioned the Joson people don’t have their own special sections in the Nackwon’s human armies: they’ve already been integrated into the general forces of the Nackwon because they are “magic, just like the Nackwon”. (something like that…) Therefore, the namushin could very well exploit Koko’s status as the princess of Joson to get the entire Joson nation as allies or give themselves political legitimacy quickly.

Remauld

Luzee initially tried to drain Queen Nanami (the queen of the dragons)’s brother for power, but he turned back into his dragon form and fled. He’s not mentioned outside a brief explanation in the magical viewer. Remauld said dragons were his friends and seems really enthusiastic about it. What if Remauld was Queen Nanami’s brother, who’s been in human form all this time? What if he felt like, as the only dragon left, he had to be a de facto parental figure for Koko and thought her human parents inadequate for the task? What if he didn’t want the pomp and restrictions of being the ruler of dragons, or was too much of a coward to confront Luzee if it could be avoided?

There’s also the possibility Remauld was Queen Nanami’s mate, which would have similar characterizations. Dragons can shapeshift into humans, but what about vice versa? Koko can shapeshift leaves into toads, among other magical features, so it’s plausible that Remauld is skilled enough to change his very body, or Queen Nanami changed his body herself. It’s stated dragons breed rarely, and they were lucky if one egg was laid per year.

Hundreds of years ago, Queen Nanami had to give a dragon’s egg to the powerful fairy Luzee as a source of magic so she could protect them against humans, before her turn against the Nackwon entirely and attempt to kill all dragons. Knowing the urgency of creating a dragon’s egg, Nanami may have chosen a shapeshifted Remauld to bypass whatever reproductive difficulties had, because a half-dragon's egg made quick was better than a full-dragon's egg too late to be useful.

Perhaps Remauld never told Koko that he sired her egg because he was ashamed that he, a lowly (compared to dragons) wizard who idolized dragons, had to be her father. Perhaps he wanted to maintain what he thought was a comforting illusion Koko was a full-blooded dragon, who only hatched weirdly because of a “dragon’s instinct to survive making it appealing to its caretakers” (his explanation for why Koko hatched as a scaly humanoid that quickly became indistinguishable from human). If Koko’s father was a magic-human, one could easily blend Koko’s identity conflict into a more coherent dual-species theme of uncertain or mixed identity.

---

Koko With Actual Subjects?

If Koko had actual subjects, her identity would be a lot more important, so Koko learning of some other dragons is a good idea for a sequel. Perhaps the namushin never found them because they live in the other nations, and their data-collecting is spotty in the nations that don’t have magic forests. Perhaps it’s hard to tell a dragon in disguise from a real human unless they’re using magic, and it takes a lot of luck to perfectly observe a candidate at just the right time. However, the dragon-folk are fully aware dragons don’t exist as a separate culture or faction any more, or their loyalties are to human rulers, or they think of themselves as “humans who can turn into dragons” rather than the reverse, so they think Koko has no authority over them.

Koko initially assumed she was special and necessary because Joson loyalty allegedly had a trace of dragon’s blood, and the Namushin (evasively) told her she was related to Queen Nanami. Perhaps, five hundred years ago, some dragons defected from the dragon military and hid as humans. (perhaps in nations other than Joson---a good excuse to explore those in the next book) Because humans so feared supernatural creatures and dragons, they hid their true natures for many decades, even generations. They told their children who grew up among humans they had exceptional magical ability (or even the “unique ability to turn into dragons”) because they were descended from the illegitimate children of Joson royalty, who, yes, had traces of dragon blood, which were especially obvious in some people by sheer luck. Since the Joson royals sure don’t want word of indiscretion getting out (especially if the dragon-humans still live in Joson) and will use force to maintain secrecy, they should keep their unique abilities secret.

These “humans who can turn into dragons” would be an interesting foil for Koko. They would delight Remauld, frustrate him, or both. They would provide Koko an alternate identity option she hadn’t even considered under the yoke of crushing expectations/child abuse. And since Koko is not only “a dragon”, but also “a dragon princess” and “princess of Joson”, she may very well be a poor choice to represent these “dragon folk” as a whole, because she shares little in common with them. The “dragon folk” might not even be (or look) Joson in their human forms. However,  one could also present them as second-generation or even twentieth-generation immigrants from Joson, only distinguishable from their neighbors at all because of their preference to interbreed with other dragon folk. (It’s unclear how long it takes for dragons to breed, or whether their human forms affect generation times.)

The above idea might allow something thematically similar to, “the only Tsimshian (Native American tribe with the lowest or second-lowest population) in the nation, who was adopted by Caucasians, and who figures Tsimshians are extinct, is brow-beaten into identifying as Tsimshian in the ‘purest’ way for Magic Reasons and is conflicted about it, but then realizes there are modern Tsimshians with very different backgrounds and identity expressions a few states away and must grapple with her identity again”.

One could probably combine “Remauld and/or the namushin are villains” with “Koko learns of humans-that-can-turn-into-dragons” into the same plot. Perhaps the namushin flush out the “Dragon Folk” in the process of restoring other nations’ forests/attacking other nations, or basically expand their tree-based “satellite vision” into other nations now that the immediate threat of Luzee is gone. (Luzee breaking out would make the Namushin’s projects pointless, after all; she would simply take over the world again and probably kill all namushin)

#Analysis #Books #Fantasy Books #Fantasy #Identity Conflicts #Identity #Literary Analysis #Meta #Dragons #Writing

[bemused-writer]

Dreamwidth and Other Social Media (But Mostly Tumblr)

I saw an advertisement on dw_dev that WisCon may be holding a panel about Dreamwidth, which is relevant to my interests because it's asking a lot of the questions I've been asking myself: Why don't people use Dreamwidth when it's one of the more respectful sites regarding personal privacy and gives you very good tools for controlling what happens with your blog? Especially when other sites are so bad at doing that?

Anyway, I have some thoughts on why people might not be using Dreamwidth despite the site having a lot of what people claim to want. Bear in mind, this is all my own personal opinion and comes from my own experiences with Dreamwidth and Tumblr, so it's not universal and I could definitely see some people having a different take.

Dreamwidth is "old school" and has something of a learning curve if you're not already familiar with the layout. It sometimes requires you to learn some basic HTML and you have to learn to maneuver Circles, Filters, Communities, and all that jazz. The end result is that you have way more control over your journal and content, but for some people all those options overload them.

It requires you to be a "content creator." Places like Tumblr allow you to be very passive in your consumption; you often don't have to create anything at all. If you want your journal to look "lived in" on Dreamwidth, you actually have to put in the effort. Having said that, there's no reason why you can't passively consume other content and add it to Memories?

Photos must be hosted elsewhere and Photobucket isn't what it once was (still sad about that one). Granted, with many places such as Imgur popping up to fill the void, this shouldn't be much of a problem, but that extra step seems to throw people off, especially when fandom is so image focused nowadays... *sigh*

Tags don't show up in one, big location for easy browsing. You have to find blogs or communities that have similar interests to you. Personally, I think this is Dreamwidth's biggest strength because, frankly, there's a serious downside to having your stuff show up in one big pool of tags and that's that people can look at it and interpret it without proper context, which then leads to the flame wars so common on Tumblr. This is what leads people to not tagging things so it will stay out of the tag, which then means they have a harder time finding it on their own blog. This strikes me as an utterly insane way of doing things. 8D But! The upside to one big pool of tags is obvious: it's easy to find things and that simplicity seems to outweigh the downsides for most people.

Dreamwidth is a small site. Once you get used to there being tons of people, a small community can seem lonely.

Tumblr is addictive. And I think that's a big part of why people stay in the first place. You get instantaneous interaction (for better or worse), you have long chain reblogs that you need to see the end of, there's the endless debates that are, frankly, addictive for a lot of people (not saying that's a good thing...), you can send in anonymous Asks and avoid the awkwardness of being known, and there's almost always more stuff. *shrug* It's a major site, so even with it's flaws, people keep going to it.

People don't know how to interact off of Tumblr? Okay, this one is just a personal gripe, but large sites like Tumblr or Reddit all seem to develop these hostile ways of interacting with one another and then they carry those attitudes to other places and they just don't work that well. Don't get me wrong, places like Dreamwidth and LiveJournal have definitely had their drama, sometimes of a very ugly variety, especially on Communities, but it's isolated to that community, not every single person looking at the tag or even just their Dashboard. Maybe this is just the problem with the Internet more generally....

I will fully admit that this isn't a particularly flattering picture I've painted. XD If the main factors for Tumblr's popularity (and other major sites such as Twitter) is that it's simply easy to use, addictive, and image heavy, I'm not sure that's a good thing? Because all of that seems to trump the obvious downsides, such as the constant advertisements, lack of privacy, glitchiness, and hostility of the userbase. And it also means places like Dreamwidth and possibly even Pillowfort will have a hard time flourishing despite having the better business model.

Anyway, I'm not sure I have a decisive conclusion here; obviously I would like it if more people used places like Dreamwidth and Pillowfort, but I think that is going to be a slow process. And I'm actually still quite fond of Tumblr myself despite how much I kind of just dissed it. 8D However, there's no denying that in recent years that site has left me feeling a lot more tired than when I first joined. I guess I'm just saying we need to think about the effects the sites we use have on us and what we're really looking for.

#Bemused's post #long post #dreamwidth #tumblr #social media #This stuff has been on my mind a lot lately...

[eldritchsurveys]

873.

5k Survey I

1. Who are you? >> I’m Mordred. 2. What are the 3 most important things everyone should know about you? >> I’m sensory-defensive and post-traumatic, I'm part of a multiple system, and I’m a fictional character.    3. When you aren’t filling out 5,000 question surveys like this one what are you doing? >> Taking way shorter surveys. When I’m not taking surveys at all, I’m posting on tumblr or pillowfort, reading, playing video games, researching video game lore, watching a movie or show, or trying to manage my hellbrain (which is a whole separate task in itself). 4. List your classes in school from the ones you like the most to the ones you like the least (or if you are out of school, think of the classes you did like and didn’t like at the time). >> I do my best not to think about school, the last bit of which was 15 years ago anyway. 5. What is your biggest goal for this year? >> I don’t make goals like that.

6. Where do you want to be in 5 years? >> It’s inconceivable to me to plan ahead that far. Even to think ahead that far seems silly and pointless to my very present-focused (and past-haunted) mind.

7. What stage of life are you in right now? >> Adulthood. Just the general “adulthood” between hectic young adulthood and transitional middle age. 8. Are you more child-like or childish? >> I’m not child-like or childish. I simply understand that the division between “childhood” and “adulthood” isn’t nearly as cut-and-dried as society has organised it for the sake of legality and social interaction, and I also understand that the desire to escape childhood and “childish things” is a conceit of the young, who wish to be seen as grown and independent creatures (which is part of development! it makes perfect sense). By the time you get to your thirties, it really stops mattering. You know you’re an adult. You know that being an adult means you have the freedom to do whatever you want (as far as leisure and play and stuff like that goes, I mean), which means you can sit in your pjs watching cartoons and eating sugar cereal if you like, and no parent can chide you for it, and your peers can fuck off if they don’t like it. (The “adult” part of doing that is knowing to stop after one and a half bowls of said cereal, lmao. It’s all a balance, innit?)

9. What is the last thing you said out loud? >> I don’t remember. 10. What song comes closest to how you feel about your life right now? >> I don’t think there’s any song that can capture that. Or, maybe there is, but I don’t know about it. 11. Have you ever taken martial arts classes? >> No. I’ve been interested, but frankly, I can’t afford anything like that. 12. Does your life tend to get better or worse or does it just stay the same? >> There is no set trajectory, like that. Life has high points and low points, and the majority of it is really spent somewhere in the middle. It’s just that we focus on the high points and the low points most often (and when the low points are particularly low, they often end up defining our entire existence, even when we’re in the middle or even at high points).   13. Does time really heal all wounds? >> It’s not time that does it. Time just always happens to pass while the healing is being done, so we figure it’s the most common denominator. It takes work to heal, not just passively sitting around waiting for it to happen. 14. How do you handle a rainy day? >> I bring an umbrella, if I have to go out. Usually I don’t, so I just... do what I would do normally? 15. Which is worse…losing your luggage or having to sort out tangled holiday lights? >> Obviously losing your luggage... 16. How is your relationship with your parents? Will you miss them when they are gone? >> We have no relationship. There will be nothing to miss. 17. Do you tend to be aware of what is going on around you? >> Yeah. Especially since I’m prone to hypervigilance. 18. What is the truest thing that you know? >> The truest thing that I know is that I don’t know shit, and neither does anyone else. We’re all just elaborately guessing about shit, and interpreting reality the best way we can. Which is great, really. The fact that we keep trying to understand shit is cool. Just... “the map is not the territory” kind of applies to a lot of the stuff we think we know. ...Or not, right? After all, what do I know? :p 19. What did you want to be when you grew up? >> I just wanted to be free. 20. Have you ever been given a second chance? >> Probably. 21. Are you more of a giver or a taker? >> I’m a fair amount of both, being, you know, a person. 22. Do you make your decisions with an open heart/mind? >> I make my decisions the best way I know how. Whatever that means. 23. What is the most physically painful thing that has ever happened to you? >> Menstrual cramps. 24. What is the most emotionally painful thing that has ever happened to you? >> Yeah, right, like I’m going to be able to rank that. 25. Who have you hugged today? >> No one. 26. Who has done something today to show they care about you? >> --- 27. Do you have a lot to learn? >> Of course. I don’t necessarily have to learn all of it, but it sure is out there. 28. If you could learn how to do three things just by wishing and not by working what would they be? >> I don’t think that would be of any benefit to me. As much as I balk at taking those long uphill journeys to skillfulness, I feel like those journeys are beneficial and aid one’s growth. I’d rather not just snap my fingers and have a djinni grant me abilities like that. 29. Which do you remember the longest: what other people say, what other people do or how other people make you feel? >> How what other people do and say makes me feel. 30. What are the key ingredients to having a good relationship? >> Meh. 31. What 3 things do you want to do before you die? >> I don’t have a list like this. 32. What three things would you want to die to avoid doing? >> I think I would rather die than be incarcerated. So I’d take the death penalty if I could avoid a life imprisonment sentence... 33. Is there a cause you believe in more than any other cause? >> Not particularly. 34. What does each decade make you think of? The 1920’s: Prohibition. Wait, was that the 20s or the 30s? 30’s: World War II. 40’s: The rest of WWII. 50’s: I just think of... all the propaganda images from that era. You know, all the... domestic Whiteness... also, weird foods like meat aspic. 60’s: Hippies and Woodstock. 70’s: The Vietnam War (and the protests). 80’s: Hair metal. 90’s: Grunge and weird television/movies. 2000 : Well, I was an adult for most of this decade, and more or less aware of the world, so I don’t have a succinct “concept” of the aughts the way I have for decades that I didn’t live through, that I only have historical knowledge of. 2010’s: ^

35. Which decade do you feel the most special connection to and why? >> I feel an emotional connection to the spirit of the nineties. I don’t feel like trying to organise my words to explain why, I feel like that would take a lot of energy right now and I still have fifteen questions to go. 36. What is your favorite oldie/classic rock song? >> I don’t have one particular favourite. 37. What country do you live in and who is the leader of that country? >> United States. Donald Trump is president, weirdly enough. If you could say any sentence to the current leader of your country what would it be? >> I’d rather not, thanks. 38. What’s your favorite TV channel to watch in the middle of the night? >> I don’t watch television in the middle of the night... 39. What Disney villain are you the most like and why? >> That’s a great question, but the thing about Disney villains is that I don’t relate to them as much as I just love watching them do what they do. Like, my favourite is Judge Frollo, but I don’t think it’s because I have anything in common with him. Or, hell, maybe I would burn down an entire city because I don’t know how to handle the fact that I really want to bone this superbly hot chick. (My actual favourite villain is Catholic Guilt.) 40. Have you ever been a girl scout/boy scout? >> Briefly. 41. If you were traveling to another continent would you rather fly or take a boat? >> I would rather fly. I feel like boat travel would take a particularly long time and I’m not into that. 42. Why is the sky blue during the day and black at night? >> Oh, you know. Science. (I’m not Google.) 43. What does your name mean? >> I’m not sure anyone really knows what “Mordred” means. 44. Would you rather explore the depths of the ocean or outer space? >> Outer space. 45. What is the first word that comes to mind when you see the word: Air: Astrology. Meat: Beef. Different: Strokes. Pink: Panther. Deserve: Entitlement. White: Power, unfortunately. Been reading about too many fucking Nazis lately. Elvis: Pelvis. Magic: Mountain. Heart: Head. Clash: Punk. Pulp: Fiction.

46. If you could meet any person in the world who is dead who would you want it to be? >> I don’t care about this. 47. What if you could meet anyone who is alive? >> I still don’t care. 48. Is there a movie that you love so much you could watch it everyday? >> Of course not. I did watch Event Horizon every day for like a month, but I was in the psych ward at the time. What the fuck else would I have done anyway? 49. You are going to be stuck alone in an elevator for a week. What do you bring to do? >> What do I bring to do?! That’s definitely the least of my concerns with a hypothetical like this. I can’t fucking survive in an elevator for a week, dude. 50. Have you ever saved someone’s life or had your life saved? >> Doubtful.

#surveys #survey #5000 question survey

[basic-cable]

Fic Rec Bingo

I saw this making the rounds on Twitter and decided I’d like to try it (mostly because I enjoy going back through my list and reminiscing about the ones I love but haven’t read in a while), but didn’t feel like Twitter was the best place to post mine. I’ve got both Dreamwidth and Pillowfort, but I haven’t really used them. This is probably the kind of thing that should go there, so maybe I’ll post it there, too. We’ll see. 

Anyway, I only read in four fandoms, so maybe my recs will be boring to most people. But they’re good stories, and maybe there are even some people out there who haven’t read them. 

I don’t expect any reblogs or anything, but maybe people will see it and decide they’d like to take part, and then there will be more fic recs out there making the world a better place.

I put them under a cut because the descriptions and stuff take up so much space.

1. A fic you love without knowing the source material Take the Pieces and Build them Skywards by quarterturn Bandom ** Frank/Gerard ** 44,816 ** Explicit ** Character Death Gerard's not happy with his life, but that doesn't mean he's particularly thrilled when he wakes up dead. To add insult to injury, he finds out that instead of crossing over, he's been chosen to join the ranks of the grim reapers. Things get more complicated when he falls for one of the living, a waiter named Frank Iero. And just when everything finally seems to be falling into place, Frank's name shows up on the list of souls to be reaped. Loosely based on the TV show Dead Like Me.

I don’t know anything about the TV show Dead Like Me; when I first read this fic in 2009, I had never even heard of it. I’ve wondered since then if I like it even better because I don’t know anything about the source material, but I’ll never know.It made me laugh and cry; it’s an emotional roller coaster, and I love it.

2. A fic with a premise that shouldn’t work but does

An Inexplicable Occurrence of Angels by stele3

Bandom ** Frank/Gerard ** 35,192 ** PG-13 ** No Warnings

I've messed with the band timeline, clearly. This is set in summer of 2005... but it ain't the Summer of Like. This is a story about second chances and gutting through your own failures, but never letting them defeat you. Take that, bitches.

Frank (Frank!) is a literal angel, okay, but there is not a thing I don’t love about this story. It’s angsty but still manages to be cute and charming as fuck, and the characterization is great.

3. A fic you’ve reread several times

Seeds by thesardine

Sherlock ** Gen, supposedly ** 5,475 ** PG-13 ** No Warnings

In a fit of boredom Sherlock plants some seeds, may or may not eat one cracker, and definitely waxes dramatic on the sofa for a while.

Sherlock struggles with a bit of depression caused by boredom, and accidentally discovers a hobby he slowly learns to allow himself to enjoy. I love this a lot; the author takes us into Sherlock’s headspace, so you’re painfully aware just how much he needs a distraction, and how much better off he is with John in his life.

4. A fic you still remember many years later

In Care Of by Fangs_Fawn

Harry Potter ** Gen ** 45,319 ** PG-13 ** Child Abuse

During the summer before sixth year, Harry finds an injured bat in the garden and decides to try to heal it...and an unwilling Snape learns just what kind of a person Harry Potter really is.

Between the Dursleys getting what’s coming to them, and the redemption of Harry, Snape, and Dumbledore in each others’ eyes, this story has really stuck with me through the years.

5. A comfort fic

Nature and Nurture by earlgreytea68

Sherlock ** Sherlock/John ** 203,273 ** Mature ** No Warnings

The British Government accidentally clones Sherlock Holmes. Which brings a baby to 221B Baker Street.

Thousands of words of fluff. Literally. There’s not a lot of conflict in this story, which makes it a great comfort fic when your mind is too busy or real life is too depressing.

6. A cathartic fic

The Quiet Man by ivyblossom

Sherlock ** Sherlock/John ** 157,369 ** Explicit ** No Warnings

"Do you just carry on talking when I'm away?"

Post-Reichenbach John is walking the line between fantasy and reality, choosing to stay with the Sherlock in his head rather than deal with the reality where he no longer exists. He eventually manages to attempt a normal life, but he’s bored and basically sleepwalking through his days, so when Sherlock finally reveals himself, it’s the best kind of relief. They go after the last remnants of Moriarty’s web, in hopes of a second chance at the life they should have had together.

7. A fic you’d print and put on your bookshelf

Saving Sherlock Holmes by earlgreytea68

Sherlock ** Sherlock/John Mycroft/Greg ** 139,494 ** Mature ** Underage

Okay. So. This was literally supposed to be, like, three or four chapters as a prologue to the show. Sort of a "what happened in the Holmes childhoods to make them the way they are today." That's why it's set in the time period it is, because I thought I was eventually going to leave them to go on to the show. And then...I got a bit carried away and thought, Here I have established the two young Holmes boys. Now what happens if, instead of making them wait twenty years, I give them everything they need to fix themselves right now? Forty-three chapters later, you have this story.

To be honest, I would like to have most of my favorite fics in book form, with actual pages, that I could pluck from my actual shelf and sit and read without the glare of a screen between us. But I do enjoy the feel of this story, and I do believe it would make a good actual book.

8. A fic you associate with a song

Unholyverse by bexless

Bandom ** Frank/Gerard ** 186,764 ** Explicit ** Violence & Character Death

“He thinks I have stigmata,” Frank said, because what the fucking hell, it couldn’t get any worse. He might as well just lay it out.

“Oh, well,” said Brian into his hands. “Of course.”

Every time I so much as think about this series, MCR’s Heaven Help Us starts playing in my head.

9. A fic that inspires you

Turn by Saras_Girl

Harry Potter ** Harry/Draco ** 306,708 ** Explicit ** No Warnings

One good turn always deserves another. Apparently.

Frankly, I love every single thing this author has ever churned out, but this one is my very favorite. Harry gets a glimpse into what his life could have been, and a chance to make big changes he desperately needs. 

10. A fic that brought you on board a new ship

So, So Fucked by Anonymous

Bandom ** Pete/Patrick ** 12,565 ** Mature ** No Warnings

Pete accidentally "outs" himself and Patrick on Good Morning America. Only problem? They're not gay. What now?

I was reading strictly in Harry Potter at the time, and wasn’t interested in bandom at all, but my best friend was doing betas for someone who was writing in bandom, and she ended up getting into it and then wrote this one, and kept calling me about it to bounce ideas around, and the story was so cute, and Pete and Patrick were so cute, and I suddenly found myself totally invested. Honestly I think it may have been one of the best things that ever happened to me.

11. A fic you wish could be a movie

The Anatomy of a Fall by novembersmith

Bandom ** Frank/Gerard ** 107,525 ** Explicit ** Violence & Character Death

The unholy union of a high school AU and a ghost story. Gerard's life takes a strange turn when his family moves to a small town in Vermont and he discovers the locals aren't all what they seem to be. Also includes: unexpected nature walks, murder, pining, improper treatment of crime scenes, a number of bone-related puns, high school bullies, and a short-range shrub named Ferdinand.

This story has excellent imagery that I think would work really well on the big screen. Plus I can’t even hear the name of it without my heart doing flip-flops.

12. A fic that led to you making friends with the author

Seven ficlets for Valentine’s Day Part VII by RedOrchid

Bandom ** GSF ** 1,042 ** Mature? ** No Warnings

Panic-as-cleaning-equipment-AU Valentine's Day GSF.

I technically don’t have a fic for this bingo square, but this one comes close, I guess. The author was already in my larger circle of friends, but we didn’t actually talk to each other? She wrote this crack ficlet around the same time we started talking to each other more, and I still vividly remember it because of the genius involved in turning band boys into literal cleaning equipment. The line “Ryan bristled” has stuck with me to this day.

13. free space

Elf ‘Verse by mokuyoubi

Bandom ** GSF ** 103,247 ** Explicit ** Underage

Modern AU where Ryan is a famous poet, and he and Spencer are fiercely private and insular and stupidly co-dependent until Jon shows up and effortlessly breaks down all their walls.

Or

Wherein Brendon and Frank are Christmas elves who, inspired by Will Farrell movies, venture into the real world to become rock stars. Or something of that nature.

I’ve got a lot of love for this universe for various reasons, but it’s also fun and heartwarming and honestly, I don’t really need anything else.

14. A fic you’ve gushed about irl

Harry Potter and the Battle of Wills by Jocelyn (and her mum)

Harry Potter ** Mostly Gen ** 137,385 ** Basically PG-13 ** Character Death

Harry mourns his godfather as the war finally begins in earnest, bringing tragedy and new struggles for all those on the side of Good. If they hope to win, all quarrels must be set aside, new alliances must be forged, and Harry Potter must find the courage to face down dark wizards, his own emotions, and a destiny he did not choose. Snape blows his cover as a spy to save Harry from Voldemort.

This begins after Order of the Phoenix, and the story and characters read more like canon than any other HP fic I’ve read, so because of that and because it’s so, so good, I like to rec this one to people who are new to fandom.

15. A fic you associate with a place

Stately Homes of Wiltshire by waspabi

Harry Potter ** Harry/Draco ** 57,582 ** Explicit ** No Warnings

Malfoy Manor has mould, dry rot and an infestation of unusually historical poltergeists. Harry Potter is on the case.

Wiltshire! I’ve never actually been there, but this author is really good about details. The story is also lovely and funny.

16. A fic that made you gasp out loud

Home is a Name by Arsenic

Bandom ** Frank/Gerard ** 39,314 ** Explicit ** No Warnings

MCR Clinic of Love. Companion fic to Wednesday Night Boys.

Okay, so this one is actually a sequel, and the first installment, Wednesday Night Boys, should 100% be read first. It must be said, though, that while the sequel doesn’t have any warnings, Wednesday Night Boys is about the Panic! kids as prostitutes, and has warnings for graphic violence, rape/non-con, and underage sex. The MCR guys work at the free clinic, and Home is a Name focuses on them. They’re honestly both gorgeous stories.

17. A fic you found at the right time

real or not real by thearkdelinquents

Anne with an E ** Anne/Gilbert ** 11,587 ** PG ** No Warnings

“I could do it.” Gilbert said, looking straight ahead.

Anne stopped. “What?”

He turned to look at her; they were just outside Green Gables now. “I could do it. I could court you.”

“What- We- You- I- You don’t like me like that.” Anne sputtered.

Gilbert smirked at her. “Well we could pretend. I could court you and be your fake boyfriend.”

For one of the few times in her life, Anne Shirley-Cuthbert was speechless.

-

a fake dating fic but it's basically just a shirbert To All The Boys I Loved Before au.

I really, really loved Anne with an E. When the final season was released, I spent a weekend binge-watching the entire show, and then it was over and I was bereft, so I decided to see what was available on Ao3, and I found this, and it was exactly what I needed. And now I have another fandom.

18. A fic that you would read fic of

Left by lifeonmars

Sherlock ** Sherlock/John ** 45,153 ** Mature ** No Warnings

John Watson is left-handed.

He’s tried not to let it affect his life, but as any Lefty knows, that’s almost impossible.

In this universe, all right-handed people have some kind of power, or ‘knack’, most of which are mild and easily categorized. Sherlock’s is rare and believed to be the only one like it in the world. John is left-handed, part of the 10% of the population without a knack. I would read all kinds of fics of this fic.

19. A fic that made you laugh out loud

What to do When Your Flatmate is Homicidal by hyacinth_sky747

Sherlock ** Sherlock/John ** 58,650 ** Explicit ** No Warnings

Sherlock takes Molly's advice when dealing with his dangerous flatmate.

Heartwarming and hilarious. I laughed a lot.

20. A fic with a line (or two) that you’ve memorised by heart

A Necessary Requirement by Bexless

Bandom ** Frank/Gerard ** 3,759 ** Mature ** No Warnings

Right, here is the extremely silly storylet I wrote BY HAND on holiday. On PAPER. With a PEN. My god. The things I do when I'm separated from my beloved net. It is set during the Summer of Like (Warped '05, for those of you who don't know) and is basically a product of my reaction to various pictures of Gerard groping himself on stage, which led to me obsessing about his dick and what it might look like. As usual, I chose to work this obsession out through Frank.

This fic could have gone to multiple other squares, but I am not usually the kind of person who can quote lines from things, and I have many lines from this story committed to memory. I’ve read it multiple times, because I read it every time I need a pick-me-up or a good laugh. Or if I’ve read something scary and I need something lighter before I can actually get up and move around my house...

21. A fic that gave you butterflies

Pretty Much A Sex God by adellyna

Bandom ** Spencer/Jon ** 3,985 ** PG-13 ** No Warnings

Jon and Spencer’s first date.

The Jon in this story is so soft and warm and fluffy and his character makes my heart and stomach do weird things.

22. A fic that embodies something you value in life

A Marauder’s Plan by CatsAreCool (Rachel500)

Harry Potter ** Harry/Hermione ** 865,520 ** PG13 ** Violence/Death/Underage

What if Sirius decided to stay in England and deliver on his promise to raise Harry instead of hiding somewhere sunny? Changes abound with that one decision...

ALSO

Harry’s New Home by kbinnz

Harry Potter ** Gen ** 318,389 ** PG-13 ** Abuse

One lonely little boy. One snarky, grumpy git. When the safety of one was entrusted to the other, everyone knew this was not going to turn out well... Or was it? AU, sequel to "Harry's First Detention". 

In these two stories, Sirius and Severus throw everything they have into creating the best possible world for Harry, as he is their number one priority, because that is exactly how parenthood should be. 

23. A favourite AU

Performance In a Leading Role by Mad_Lori

Sherlock ** Sherlock/John ** 156,714 ** Explicit ** No Warnings

Sherlock Holmes is an Oscar winner in the midst of a career slump. John Watson is an Everyman actor trapped in the rom-com ghetto. When they are cast as a gay couple in a new independent drama, will they surprise each other? Will their on-screen romance make its way into the real world?

This has got quite a bit of schmoop, which isn’t usually my thing, but this story is so, so good, and I always love stories that describe Sherlock realizing and appreciating how extraordinary John is.

24. A fic you stayed up too late to finish reading

Collared by VelvetMace

Sherlock ** Sherlock/John ** 83,028 ** Explicit ** Violence & Rape/Non-Con

In a world where the British Empire is still strong and slavery is her economic backbone, John has become a terrorist for the abolitionist movement. He is caught by Mycroft, enslaved, and given to Sherlock for training. The goal: To test a new kind of slave collar with the power to break even the strongest willed fighter. One that will make even John learn to love being a slave.

Dubious consent, and humiliation. I remember staying up very late reading this one, even though I had to work early the next morning. I just couldn’t put it down. 

25. A fic that made you feel seen

Buy Handmade by jjtaylor

Bandom ** Frank/Gerard ** 18,755 ** Mature ** No Warnings

He knows something else is going to happen; his life isn't always going to be this. He just doesn't know what has to happen for that change to come, for him to wake up and become an artist with an Etsy page and a home studio, and to never have to see a cubicle again.

This is the story of my heart. I have felt Frankie’s feelings and thought his thoughts, and I love that he does something about it, and I love Gerard so, so much. I first read this in 2009, and my love for it has never wavered. I could have used this one for a good half of the bingo squares, but it’s the only one that could go here.

#fic rec bingo #bandom #sherlock #harry potter #anne with an e

[professor-spacecakes]

I'm not trying to be rude or offensive in any way asking this, but have you thought about focusing on another platform for your art like Instagram or Twitter? I know you're already on Twitter but it seems like here people don't appreciate you for the amazing and talented artist you are and you shouldn't have to deal with this. Once again not trying to be rude just asking

Don’t worry, you’re not being rude at all! I do appreciate the suggestion, but I’m afraid that’s the first thing anyone ever says to me in these instances. Yes, I am on other platforms. I post my art on my Twitter pretty much the same time I post it here (the Cyberpunk pieces still did just as poorly over there…) and I’ve had a DeviantArt account for 12 years that I still post to.

Ah, Instagram… I have a love/hate relationship with Instagram, in that I hate it and it loves to piss me off. 

My biggest pet peeve is the aggressive cropping. I don’t do art with Instagram in mind, thus I don’t always draw my pictures within Instagram’s restrictive crop limit, leaving my pieces horribly chopped off at the top and bottom with no way to recenter it. 

Also, if I draw a panel-per-image comic with varying image sizes, it will crop all of the images down to fit the most square one, cutting off important bits (which is why I can’t post the original Cyberpunk comic I did over there, or any of my DaveMight birthday comics) 

Besides, there’s no exposure over there. If I want people to find my art, I’ve gotta, what, sit and wait for someone to dig far enough down in a certain tag to find it? That’ll almost never happen. At least here other people can reblog your stuff (rarely…) and expose it to their followers who might not have gone down the rabbithole search engine. This is probably why there’s so many goddamn art thieves over there, too.

Finally, I’ve got, like, 25 followers over there, and the ones that aren’t also over here on tumblr or twitter anyway are just those “Hey, I like your stuff! Follow for follow? =3″ people who have zero interest in my art and are just trying to get more followers for themselves. Also my account was hijacked by someone in Russia the first day I had it, so I really have no love for Instagram at this point. I still got it, I still post to it every now and then, but… It’s just not doing anything for me. 

I have a Pillowfort, but until they open it up to people without having to pay $5 for an account, I don’t see any point in posting there either. I… Really don’t know what else to do beyond that.

Edit: Oh! Also I sometimes post to Newgrounds since the Great Titty Ban of 2018, but uhh... Yeah. They are not kind to gay art over there. Big regrets, might just completely delete.

#Anonymous

[leo-lucid]

Bewitching Which Monster Chapter 6: The Attic

The schedule was pinned up in the kitchen for everyone to write on. It was much easier to do this than going up to everyone and asking them. Besides, some people were still out of the house. It honestly made me happy to see almost everyone rush to the calendar after dinner was over.

My plate was taken up by Zamuel and I waited at my seat, sipping my tea. It took awhile for everyone to get done adding their prefered times and date, but once it was done the schedule appeared full. I noticed that Endrian and Danton didn't have anything written down. It made sense why Endian wouldn't add anything to it was of now considering that he was out of the house still. However, I wasn't sure where Danton could be.

Now that I think about it, he wasn't present during dinner either.

I told myself that I wasn't going to pressure anyone or approach anyone about this, but I was curious to what Danton thought. He was the only one that didn't seem to express much interest or personal opinions since we have met. I could even argue that we haven't even really met yet. He was cut off by Cassi before he could finish everything he wanted to say.

I drank the rest of my tea and went into the kitchen to find Zam beginning to wash dishes. "Excuse me, Zam? You wouldn't happen to know where Danton is, would you?"

"Ghothel spends most of zirs time in the library or up in the attic, zirs personal bedroom." He answered, putting a rinsed plate into the dishwasher. I nodded and began to head towards the top floor and towards the attic first, remembering the neutral pronouns. It was shame that I couldn't learn Danton's preferred pronouns from zirself, but at least I know now.

I didn't quite understand why Danton would decide to reside in the attic. There were plenty of regular bedrooms all over the mansion. I couldn't remember what was in the attic either let alone how long it's been since it's been cleaned. Perhaps Danton cleaned everything zirself? But, ze was a ghost. Thinking about the subject confused me a little too much, so I simply went to the top floor and opened a door that led to more stairs that would lead to the attic.

The door that led to the main floor of the attic was a dreary purple. The pain was chipping off and the wood of the door itself was rough. I was afraid to touch it in case I got a splinter. Still, I braved through it and knocked on the door. Perhaps I should make fixing this door my next craft project. Maybe even use some of my magic on it.

I didn't hear any movement or indication that someone was inside for a good minute. I gave one more knock and waited a little bit more for a response. Just as I was about to turn and head to the library next, the door creaked open. I saw a lock of white hair and slowly saw one half of Danton as ze peered from behind the door. Ze looked nervous. It was infectious.

"H-Hello, Danton. U-Um, could we talk? About the schedule?" I greeted, stumbling over my words just a smidge. Ze didn't reply verbally. Instead, ze just held the door open a little more for me to enter zirs room.

Unlike the state of the door and the hall leading to the attic, zirs room was magnificently clean and warm. Fairy lights, blankets and pillows everywhere, pressed flowers, and scattered books were present in the room. It looked more like the inside of an elaborate pillowfort than a regular bedroom or attic. I was impressed. Inspired even.

Danton took a seat on a pillow lying on the floor and gestured for me to sit on a pillow across from zir. I sat down, still looking around the comforting room a bit. Despite how warm the atmosphere was, there was a lingering awkwardness. Part of it may have been from Danton not speaking a word to me since I arrived. A part of me though that ze may have been the introverted and shy type, but I suppose I should've prepared for it more.

I cleared my throat and focused my eyes on zir visible lilac eye. "You weren't present during dinner so you may not know this but I created a schedule for everyone to mark their desired date times on. There's still room for you to put something down for this month if you wish."

"I know." Ze softly spoke, now looking away towards the books on the floor. I didn't quite know how to respond to that. Ze already knew that there was a schedule up apparently but didn't bother to come and write anything down.

"O-Oh! I see. D-Did you not plan on participating?" I hesitantly asked. It's not like it would hurt my feelings if ze said that ze wasn't interested in well. . . dating me. I would be hesitant to date a complete stranger too. And I am.

"I. . ." Ze began, but soon trailed off. Zir face was contorted with nervousness. Ze rubbed the back of zir neck, trying figure out how to proceed with the conversation.

I attempted to laugh and shrug. "I-It doesn't hurt my feelings that you don't want to date me. I get it. Dating a complete stranger is weird. It even freaks me out a little if I'm being honest."

"Th-That's not it. . ." Ze spoke up, a faint redness growing over zir white, semi-transparent cheeks. Now I really didn't know how to respond. I didn't understand the reason why ze didn't seem to be interested in filling out a space in the schedule.

I waited a bit to see if ze would explain the situation further. Ze simply continued to stare at the books on the floor. The space between us felt even more awkward now. This ghost wasn't giving me much to work with here.

It suddenly clicked. Why couldn't I realize this before? I cleared my throat and picked up the conversation again. "Danton? Is it possible that you aren't able to touch things within this plane?"

Ze suddenly became wide-eyed as I caught on to what may be part of the problem. Ze seemed to get flustered as ze tried to explain the problem. "I-I can pick up s-some objects. Low energy o-objects. T-Touching living beings is. . . harder. It takes m-much more energy. I'm sorry. Very sorry."

I didn't know a ton about ghosts but I knew some information. Records show that ghosts were able to interact with some things within the realm of the living but it took some amount of energy to do so. Inanimate objects are much easier to interact with than it is to interact with humans or even animals. Danton probably didn't need to do things like eat or drink either. That didn't leave zir with many date options.

"I-It's okay! Really! We don't have to do anything that most people do on dates. It's not like I'm going on dates with a bunch of regular people too, so I have to adapt anyways. E-Even if you weren't a ghost, I would not expect you to do anything you weren't comfortable with." I replied, the air clearing up as the problem was revealed.

"I-I would hate to waste your time. . . " Ze confessed. For some reason, my eyes followed zir line of sight over to the books. My eyes caught a few words before I realized that it was a romance novel. In fact, I now saw that most of the books within the room were romance novels. Ze must think that the standards in romance novels had to apply to reality.

I decided that trying to reassure zir wasn't going to work well. Instead, I took a different route to get to know zir and try to get zir to open up. "What is this book about? It looks to be really good."

Danton seemed to somewhat relax as I switched topics. Ze picked up the book I was looking at and closed it, setting it down with the front cover up in front of me. "It's about a prince that falls in love with a maid, but he's betrothed to another woman. So, the man meets the woman he really loves in secret. There are moments were it seems like they will get caught by the guards or by the prince's parents. However, so far they seem to be okay. I haven't finished it yet though."

This was the first time I heard Danton speak without being cut off, stuttering, or trailing off. It was actually nice to hear zir voice so clearly and confidently. Zir voice was still soft and smooth like silk. Zir voice reminded me of feathers stuffed inside a comfy pillow. Ze still sounded a smidge shy, however I was feeling more comfortable as ze spoke.

"I see. I hope you finish the novel very soon then. What about this one?" I pointed to another book to keep the conversation going. I felt like we were really making progress in getting zir to open up. Perhaps with a little more talking, zir would come to feel confident enough to fill a space on the schedule.

"That one is about a woman that goes to Paris and falls in love with a painter. She goes to buy her paintings everyday until she has no more money left to go back home. Eventually, the painter offers to let the woman stay at her studio where she gains inspiration and uses the woman as a muse and eventually the painter falls in love with her model." Ze explained, a light smile forming on zir face.

"That sounds lovely, Danton. I would love to borrow one of your books sometime. Perhaps we could read together sometime?" I suggested, not really thinking about just what I asked. It wasn't until a few seconds after I said it and a few seconds of silence that I began to blush. I. . . Did I just kinda asked Danton out on a date?

Danton seemed to also take my suggestion as a proposal for a reading date. Zir transparent cheeks turned a harsh shade of red. The heat I felt on my own cheeks was an indication that my face was probably just as red as zirs. I attempted to salvage the situation, throwing my hands up in defense and shaking my head. "I-It doesn't have to be a d-date! W-We can just r-read as f-friends!"

"Y-Yeah! I-I mean. . . I-I guess I d-don't mind if it was a d-date now. . ." Danton now confessed, cheeks only growing brighter and redder.

While it made me happy that I managed to get zir to become more comfortable with me and the idea of going on dates with me, it also made me incredibly flattered and embarrassed. My heart was beginning to race and I subconsciously stared at zir face.

Ze may be a little transparent, had white skin, and zir bangs only revealed one lilac eye, zir was actually kinda cute. Zir appeared to be mostly androgynous but leaned on the more masculine side. Zir lashes were pretty long and the shape of zir eyes gentle, but zir jawline was prominent and ze was only an inch or two taller than me. Danton was really cute now that I really paid attention to zir.

As soon as I realized that I was staring, I shook my head slightly to force myself out of my trance and blushed harder, now matching how bright Danton's cheeks were. "G-Great! Th-Then, I will add a s-spot on the schedule for our r-reading date. Th-Thank you for accepting my offer!"

"R-Right. . . I-I'll see you on before and o-on our d-date then, A-Anise." Ze responded. I took that as my cue to get up and head towards the door. I gave zir one last nod and nervous smile before exiting the attic and quietly closing the door behind me. A huge sigh left my lips as the awkward weight lifted off of my shoulders.

Perhaps I shouldn't pay attention to how good-looking everyone was from now on. It would just make acting natural on the dates even harder. I hope that reading wouldn't be totally impossible when my date with Danton comes.

#creative writing #novel #romance #writeblr #reverse harem