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#do i deserve it even if im sure i wont have my dream body by then.. 😮‍💨 maybe
ackee · 4 months
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totally forgot my birthday is next month. [looks wistfully at robot masks]
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elllisaaa · 1 month
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Hihi , im not really sure if it would be ur style of writing but i had a dream abt it and i thought u could write smth along those lines(i think for this fluff would be good🥹 but if u wanna add smut is fine too hehe)
Heres the prompt:
Basically most of the days you would be hanging out w ur bff beomgyu after sch, just hanging out in each other’s presence is enough. You guys wont force a conversation if its not needed n sitting in silence gives you both a peace of mind.(thise type of fs)
But one day u told him that u were going to an event with ur girl bff , where she could see her fav artist , and you being a supportive bestie decided to go with her!
Somehow thru the night things changed and you ended up with beomgyu saying these words: “ It’s always been you y/n, my eyes are only for you”
(Not rlly sure if this is how a prompt should be(if im giving too much cos this is my first prompt) but i hope it sparks interest >_<)
hiii anonie !! this definitely so damn cute, i got a little overboard with this one but i love it so much, it's so soft omgg ! this definitely such a good idea i love it, and don't worry - the longer your thoughts are, the more i'm happy !
BFF!BEOMGYU who never stops annoying you every day, be it by sending you tons of texts or by dropping by your place when he's done with his schedule. well, you always claim that he's annoying but he knows that it isn't the truth and that you're always happy to see him.
"by the way, i will not be there for our movie night tomorrow, i'm sorry." beomgyu turned to you with a judgemental look on his face. "you're letting me down !?" you rolled your eyes as you threw one of the cushions of your sofa at him. "don't be so dramatic. i'm just going to a fanmeeting with one of my friend because she didn't want to be alone."
and even if your reasons were very valid, beomgyu couldn't help but be bothered. you always spend your free time with him, and it didn't even matter if the two of you just laid in your bed in silence, watching a serie while playing stupid games on your phones. it didn't matter because what he seeked was your presence, feeling you by his side. he loved to know that he could lay his head on your lap anytime and that you would drop your phone to thread your fingers through his hair until he fell asleep.
but sometimes, just sometimes, he wished he could be even closer to you. the type of closeness that would allow him to feel jealous about you going to a fanmeeting of another idol. the type of closeness that would allow him to kiss you, and love you like you deserved to be loved.
a pout was visible on his face, but what was even more striking was the slighlty hurt look in his eyes. and even if your best friend was always a little drama queen whenever you cancelled plans with him or hung out with somebody else, you never took him too seriously, knowing that he just liked to yap. but today, it seemed different.
beomgyu didn't want to separate from your warm body, but he still sat up, already missing the feeling of your hands in his hair, but his heart was hurting too much to keep pretending this time. it was nothing, he was aware, and he didn't have any right being jealous or feeling like he was. but he did, and he wished you would feel the same even if it was impossible because he was him and you were yourself, and there was simply no way that you would love him like that.
"why are you taking it like that gyu ? i know it's a little late to let you know, i should've told you before but it's no big deal, yeah ? i'm free this weekend if you wanna come by after practice, i'll even cook for you if you want."
beomgyu could feel a knot forming in his throat the more you talked, realizing how wrong he was for making you feel guilty about something you weren't responsible for. but the question he was dying to ask still got out of his mouth, the words coming out almost against his will : "do you like him more than me ? do you think that he sings better ? is that why you're letting me down ?"
his shaking voice made your heart clench, and you paused the movie that was now serving as a background noise, focusing entirely on your best friend and the way he was fidgeting, not daring to look you in the eyes but he seemed more than anxious, more than sad.
"where is that coming from gyu ? i've never said that. or did i make you feel this way ?" but beomgyu shook his head no. "you didn't. it's just…" he stopped for a moment, seemingly thinking about something before he curled up on himself on your couch, gaze fixed on the frozen tv screen. "forget it, i'm just being selfish."
the entire mood had changed, but you couldn't care less - you were only very worried about your best friend. "you know you can be selfish sometimes, i don't mind. tell me what's going on, please ?" and beomgyu finally looked at you in the eyes, biting his lips as if he was still unsure about what he was going to say : "i'm making a big deal out of this because i want to be the only one you're fangirling over, okay ? i want to be the only one you find handsome, and the only one you gush to your friends about. i wanna be the only one for you because for me it has always been you y/n, my eyes are only on you."
you looked at him dumbfounded, as you clearly didn't expect a confession, especially from your best friend. but quickly, a little smile spread on your lips as you reached for beomgyu's hand. he let you do that, and he let you pull him closer to you too, your face only inches away from the other.
"you've always been the only one for me too gyu, i simply didn't think that you would feel the same because you're always surrounded by the most beautiful girls of the country, so why would you choose me ?" - "because i'm in love with you, so in love with you it hurts sometimes." your smile was matching his, and you could see his brown eyes sparkling with joy again. "i'm in love with you too, have been for so long." - "does that mean i can kiss you now ?" you chuckled but still nodded : "yes, you can."
so beomgyu kissed you, and the way his heart exploded in his ribcage was only another proof of how down bad for you he was. and he didn't want this feeling to ever stop if that meant he could wake up by your side every morning.
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ultrastarbee · 2 years
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For your sixth month anniversary, Kazutora wanted to make something special because he knows that he’ll go back to juvie and wont be out for a long time. So he asks Mitsuya for help. He asked if he could teach him how to make a small tiger plush toy. Kazutora thought it would be easy but no- this boy is no hope and Mitsuya was fed up. But after persistence (and a whole 2 weeks), he was able to make a decent, huggable tiger plushie that he gave to reader so that they can have something to kiss, hug and talk to in place of kazutora while he was gone.
-🎀 im brainrotting kazutora so bad. hes just a small tiger :( and the manga barely showed kazutora and mitsuya’s friendship even if they were both founding members. i’m here to change that
My beloved 🎀, I share the brainrot with you. He's just too cute and deserves more love. SO LET'S GIVE HIM MORE LOVE!
Title: Striped plushie Request: YES Couple: Kazutora x reader Category: fluffy Content Warning: Word Count: 484 Summary: Kazutora knows he may get arrested again, so before Bloody Halloween he works on making you a present A/N: this is too cute omg your requests are so light I love them. I changed it a little while writing, sorry I didn’t even noticed
MASTERLIST ....... RULES ....... SERIES LIST
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Before setting the fight between Toman and Valhalla Kazutora had somethings he still wanted to do before risking everything against Mikey. And each one of those things had to do with you. Kazutora knew he would be arrested again after killing Mikey and he was ready for that, but first your boyfriend needed to make you happier than ever. You already stayed two years apart and now Kazutora will go away again. He needs to make up to you so you don't leave him as everyone else.
First he went to Mitsuya, who was a little surprised to see him, but welcomed Kazutora as a good friend. They had fun for a while and then Kazutora asked his old friend for some help. Showing Mitsuya a child book Kazutora smiled.
"You want me to make one?" Mitsuya frowns a little confused looking at the book. It's a plush toy of a tiger.
"No! I want you to teach me how to make one"
"Why?"
"I need it"
That's how it started. Mitsuya made some drawings to get a better idea of the plush toy Kazutora wanted so much. They choosed the fabric for the body and the buttons for the eyes together, made the cuts and also choosed the sewing thread color. That was the easy part. Even with Mitsuya telling him it was harder than it looked, Kazutora was excited. He wanted to give you something cute. Something special to remind you of him. Something that looked like him. Something you could hug when you missed him.
But there's no hope for Kazutora. All his fingers ended up bleeding a little. Mitsuya never saw someone so bad at sewing. But Kazutora tough, he won't let some pierced fingers stop him. It took him two whole weeks, but Kazutora did it. He finished your present.
He hugs Mitsuya and shakes him a little, soon leaving to find you. It's night and you are already on your pajamas when he arrives at your house. Kazutora doesn't give a sigle fuck about your parents being home and enter through you bedroom window.
Kazutora's face is all red when he hugs and kisses you after handing you the plushie.
"You made me a little tiger? Just like you?" you are so happy snuggling against the plushie.
"I did!" Kazutora's voice is so excited just to see your smile, but he ends up taking the present and trowing it on your bed "But it's for when I'm not around! And I'm here now, so hold me now!"
You laugh, take him into your arms and kiss every single one of his fingers now covered with bandages. You are sure you can hear Kazutora purr on your neck.
He never told you why he would not be around, but you thought it was just a way of speeking. You couldn't even dream about the blood bath yet to come.
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obsessive-ego · 3 years
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Late night chats
Musical beetlejuice x reader
Beej chats with you when he knows you're not listening
Fluff, pining
It was a long rough week, you were absolutely exhausted, you could barely stand, your knees wobbled as you finally arrived home, everyday this week has been hell between work using you to cover everyone and do everything, and personal family drama you had to attend too, you were glad to finally be home, safe, quiet, where nothing was expected of you, you could finally recharge.
Kicking your shoes off and tossing your bag and jacket aside to deal with later.
As you shamble to your bedroom, eager to swap your work clothes to something less constricting, you tap away on your phone, ordering dinner, you were too tired to cook anyway.
In your bedroom, you were quick to ditch your uniform in replacement for an over sized shirt and a pair of pajama pants.
Removing your bra felt like a weight has been lifted, as you slip on your pajamas you felt 100 pounds lighter, you flop down on your bed, barely clinging to being awake, as you were about to doze off, your phone blares to life with its loud ringtone, you groan in frustration, you force your body to get up and dig for your phone in your pants pocket, you miss the call by a second, before you could check who it was it buzzes again, you nearly drop the phone, startled, you fumble with the gadget, quickly answering the call, assuming it was your incompetent coworkers needing a question asked.
"What are you wearing?~"
You frown, knowing that voice anywhere
"Beetlejuice-"
"Oh baby, you will be wearing me by the time I'm done with you~" he moans
You scowl at this joke, too tired to really deal with his sense of humor, yes the ghoul could easily make you laugh with their lewd jokes, but honestly you were so tired nothing else really mattered.
"What-"
"So we gonna hook up? Or are you standing me up?"
"What?"
"Y/n what day is it?"
You're silent for longer then youd like to admit, beetlejuice starts before you could respond
"Friday, movie night, so, let's hear that magic b word sweetheart~" he chimes in a sing song tone.
As tired as you were, I guess a chill movie night would be fine, if you doze off during you could survive the teasing, wouldnt be the first time.
"Hello? Sugar? I'm not hearing my name come from that pretty little mouth of yours~"
You snap back, guess you zoned out longer then you thought, you utter a quick sorry, and shuffle to the living room.
"Beetlejuice, beetlejuice, beetlejuice"
Your apartment goes dark, you sigh, the ghoul had a thing for making an entrance
"HONEY IM HOME" the ghoul shouts, within seconds you are hoisted up from behind in a tight bear hug, Beetlejuice's head resting on you shoulder "babes I missed ya, you're such a mean little thing forgetting about our movie night, or were you just playing hard to get~" he purrs that last part.
Clearly embarrassed you try your best to squirm out of your predicament, the demon only cackles at your actions
"Keep wiggling like that sugar and your gonna give me a-"
The ghoul was interrupted by a knocking at your door, his eyes light up, before you could get a word in, you are dragged along to the front door
"Its showtime"
...
It was amazing how you were still able to order take out with all the nonsense beetlejuice did to the delivery guys, but it just goes to show that it's all about money, and let's be honest, nobody is gonna believe them, yeah sure, a zombie looking guy took the pizza and then turned into a pile of snakes.
...
Movie night was the same as always, Beej successfully snuggling up close with an arm around your shoulder, ever since the change of seasons he found you no longer took the lead on getting up close and personal, meaning he had to take initiative, not that he minded, since regardless of the temperature, you didnt mind him cuddling up, which was nice, you were so warm to the touch, he adored it.
Movie night was always a blast with the demon, yes you've seen this horror films 100 times, but watching them with Beej always made them more lively, his enthusiasm was so contagious. But as much fun as the evening together was you were officially out of energy, you tired in vain to keep awake, last movie night you dozed off midway through you delt with merciless teasing for a week, but all your effort was for not as you felt yourself slip into dreamland.
"Alright Doll what's up next in our-" the demon finally noticed you were out, he frowns, yeah it was cute, and sexy when you fell asleep on him, but it was really becoming kind of a pain on how hard you worked and how much it drained you, breathers are delicate, and besides he wanted to spend some real legit alone time with you.
The demon snaps his fingers and the two of you reappear in your bedroom, you being tucked into your bed, beej floats up beside you in a lounging position.
The ghoul stares at you, watching you naturally settle into a deep sleep, once a few moments have past and beetlejuice was sure you were out cold, he leans back placing his hands behind his head and let's out a deep sigh.
"Ya know doll, the other week I was in the netherworld for business, bumped into an old pal, buddy was going on and on about this demon he was banging, and boy, the look on his face when I told him I was banging a hot little breather, man, fucker was jealous, I mean we arent technically banging, yet." He whispered
This was a habit of Bj's chatting to you when you were asleep, he didnt need to sleep, so this was a nice way to pass the time.
"I showed him that photo of us lyds took, ya know the one, you were sitting on the couch playing with you phone and I had my head on your lap? Yeah, I keep it in my wallet, hell, it's the only thing in there" he snickers
You mumble something unintelligible, Beej hums in response
"Of course not sugar, I dont keep condoms in there, i prefer to go raw, demons cant get breathers pregnant anyways, wink wink"
The ghoul sighs reclining back and putting his hands behind his head
"Ya know, while I was down there, I had to file some paperwork with my Mom, the bitch she is, was going on and on about how I need to stop screwing around with breathers, she just doesnt get me, you know how it is"
You grumble in response
"Oh, yeah I know I told ya a sandworm ate her, shes back, it's a long story" he huffs with a scowl.
"Yeah she was saying how theres no point of me tricking another breather for a green card to live again, and I should leave you alone, fuck her, ya know, I dont need to trick ya for a green card, i know you're head over heels for me babes, and once you finally admit you love me and we fuck around for a bit, then I'll pop the question." He trails off looking in your direction, your were laying on your side facing the demon, as if you were awake listening to his every word, the demon sighs, staring at you sleeping form, god slash satan  he had no idea what he did to deserve you, his sweet caring breather. He could always come back to you, you were all his, you just didnt know it yet, and that was fine, for now, soon he'll get you to confess your undying love.
"What would I do without our little chats" he sighs, his eyes fixated on you, a purple hue begins to creep into his hair, he sighs again
"The only time I can be honest with ya huh babes?"
You mumble in response
"Its not like I dont WANT to be honest with ya, its just, come on, you gonna believe me? A demon from hell falling head over heels for a sweet little breather? I can barely believe it" he stares at you, his hair now completely purple.
"You know I love ya right?" The confidence in his voice fading, the question sounding more desperate then anything, as if the ghoul needed you to know or hed die again.
"...beee" you sigh
Beetlejuice perks up at the sound of your voice "bee?" Were you dreaming of him? The ghoul could just melt at the thought
"...beetlejuice"
You were
The purple in the demon's hair began to mix with hints of pink, his little breather was dreaming of him, the ghoul leans into you, his face inches from yours, studying your face in hopes to crack the mystery of what kind of dream you were having
"...beetlejuice" Again you mumble his name in your sleep
"Do you dream about me often babes? Ya know I dream of you~" he chuckles
"Beetle-"
Before you could finish the b word the demon shakes you awake
"Fuck" you say with a start "beetlejuice what are you doing" you grumble less then thrilled to be woken like this
"You were about to say the b word 3 times babes, had to put a stop to it" he chuckles sheepishly "you were babbling my name away in your sleep, guess you missed me huh?" His nervousness turned into a more confident jab
"I was? I-" you babble
"If you REALLY miss me baby cakes I could slip into bed with ya? Keep ya company" he leans in inches from your face, a moment passes and beetlejuice can see the hesitation in your face, yes he's snuck into bed with you multiple times, but he always left before you noticed.
"I wont do anything creepy" he begs grasping your hand as if to reassure you
"....okay" you whisper
The ghoul's eyes light up at your response in a flash he sheds his suit, leaving only a pair of boxers and slides under the covers next to you, the ghoul is over come by the warmth beneath the covers, and quickly latches on to your even warmer body.
"Good night Bee" you sigh "I'll try not to say your name 3 times"
"Night sugar♡" he cuddles into your chest making you the bigger spoon, though you were the smaller out of the two of you.
As you drift back into a deep sleep beetlejuice begins talking to you again
"You really know how to spoil a guy huh sugar, I guess I can wait a little longer till you say the 3 little words, as long as ya keep treating me like this♡ good night y/n, I love you"
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technowoah · 3 years
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since I'm a gremlin I can ask for a c!Schlatt angst fighting with reader while he's drunk and the reader is just fed up with dealing with him and goes "IF YOU LIKE SO MUCH TALKING YOU DON'T NEED ME I'M LEAVING!" and just walks away and he realizes the shit he's done?
(the same anon who wasn't prepared to be heartbroken-)
Heartless
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Somehow you find your way back to Schlatt again and it never goes as well as you think.
- c!schlatt x reader
- angst
- anon!requested
- part 1 to this story
⚠︎: swearing, angst, alcoholism, mentions of dying, c!quackity makes a appearance, hopefully this is sad enough yall-
An// i decided to make this a part 2 to Have a Heart! So I hope you enjoy love!
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The night is still cold and dark as you begrudgingly walk back to one of the buildings that was put up to replace whatever L'Manburg was there before. 
After Dream's word you had still contemplated going back to Schlatt. He doesn't deserve what you do, but you still end up walking along the Prime Path back to the drunken man. You had no end goal and that was a problem. You probably were going to be embarrassed that you came back to him. You couldn't let Schlatt die, from either the hands of someone else or let him die from himself.
You eventually found yourself in front of the metal doors that led into endless hallways of offices nobody occupied. The offices that had wine and cigarettes for Schlatt to smoke just in case he decided to have a meeting in a room that isn't the official meeting room. 
Walking down the hallways you saw that most of the doors to each office were open and most of the alcohol and cigarettes were taken from each room. You peaked inside every room to see if Schlatt was in there, but something in you told you not to because you weren't prepared. What were you going to say? Stop drinking? Because you're sure he'll know he's not going to stop. You want to try to save him.
You slowly opened a door to reveal an office that looked an absolute mess. The small refrigerator was knocked over and all of the wine off the shelf was either shattered on the floor or gone. There were cigarette butts on the ground and lit a cigar, there were also papers and folders all across the room.
You whispered as you walked around the lit room "Schlatt must've been in here."
"Sure as hell he was!"
You spun around to see Quackity looking disheveled as ever. He had a bottle of liquor in his hand, his beanie threatened to fall off of his head and his suit now only a white button up with his dress pants still on.
"I've been running around this goddamn place trying to keep that ram man at peace! He's gonna drink himself to death." Quackity huffed while looking around the hallway.
"I know." 
"That's why you're here huh?"
You sighed at the realization. "Yes it is. I don't want him to drink himself to death. Death isn't what I want."
"Well, it's too late for that." Quackity faced away from you not wanting to look you in the eyes.
You stayed silent until Quackity spoke up again.
"You want me to take you to him? Wanna see him one last time before he dies-"
"Don't say that!" You rolled your eyes 
"Are you fucking kidding me? It's inevitable Y/N! His body is now 70 percent alcohol and his lungs are filled with smoke!" Quackity laughed in disbelief. "I don't want him to die! But its fucking inevitable. Either from someone else or-"
"Himself." You finished his sentence.
"Exactly!" He opened his mouth to speak again but apparently decided against it.
Quackity began to lead you out of the office and down the long hallway you two walked slowly not even knowing where Schlatt was in the whole building. You and Quackity made small talk.
"I hate this. I had to find this liquor and deliver it to him and now I can't find him."
"I came here to try and save him from himself and you're here feeding the problem."
"What else do you want me to do?" He grunted.
"Stop him!"
"If I stop him he's gonna be even worse so-!" Quackity threw up his hands in frustration as you two kept walking.
"I actually have something to tell you." Quackity spoke up after the silence.
"Quackity! Ah there you are!" Schlatt came around the corner behind you both and you turned around to meet the man you both have been looking for stumbling down the hallway.
"Ah you bitch! I thought I told you to leave!"
"Here we go." You rolled your eyes.
"Hey Schlatt! Here's the Liquor you wanted!" Quackity tried to liven up the situation by reaching the bottle out to Schlatt.
"He doesn't need it."
"Yeah I do, who are you to tell me what to do!" Schlatt yelled, not even taking the drink out of Quackity's hand. 
"Schlatt just calm down-"
"No! They made a mistake and they cant even do what I fucking say! They'll keep coming back to me, against my wishes!" Schlatt interrupted Quackity while flailing his arms around.
You stood still not wanting to hear him anymore. Ever since he won the presidential debate the first couple of months he's been sober with only a few drinks here and there. Now he's a full on alcoholic, only damaging himself and his presidency. It's a sad sight to see and you don't want to see it, so you can either run away and know it's still there or fix it and never see it again. 
"Schlatt I want to help." You hesitated before stepping forward.
"Same here Schlatt." Quackity agreed with you.
"You, you! Aren't any help!" He pointed directly at you while trying to keep himself upright. 
"How aren't I any help!?" You yelled back. "I've done everything for you and now you're digging yourself a grave Schlatt!"
"You think you're the best thing ever huh?! Im fucking fine! I can stand on my own two fucking feet!"
Schlatt wasn't standing up straight, he was stumbling either backwards or forward. His body threatened to fall onto the marble floor and he couldn't even stand up straight. His speech was slurring together as well you could barely understand him.
You finally responded to Schlatt. "Schlatt you're stumbling around like- like I don't even know what! I can't understand you and you just need to stop!"
"You're so useless! Not useful to me or my presidency! I can stand up straight and I'm completely fine shut the fuck up!" He yelled while leaning to the side.
"I'd rather die alone! Without you or Quackity." Schlatt yelled again
"That's what you're going to do anyways." Quackity whispered under his breath.
Schlatt kept babbling nonsense as his back slid down one of the walls as he sat on the floor. Head pulled to the side. It was a sad sight to see, you hated to see this man drink himself to death and apparently Quackity, who was looking at the ram man the same way, standing silently next to you.
"Schlatt this-"
"I dont fucking care what you think! You're the worst person I've ever met! You both made my life hell and that's why Im fucking drinking my life away so I wont see any of you're fucking faces!" Schlatt tried to stand up but failed in doing so.
He continued talking. "I am the best thing that happened to this country! I saved both of you from a tyrant! And you thank me by driving me into this state!" 
You felt your eyes threatening to spill tears the second time today.
"Schlatt that isn't me that's doing this shit!" 
"How the fuck would you know?!" 
"I can't. But Ive done every fucking thing for you! You cannot say I haven't!" You yelled back as he rolled his eyes with a rebuttal already on the tip of his tongue.
"Sure as hell I can! I have fucking proof-!"
"What proof?!" You interrupted his babbling even though he kept going.
"I- I!" he stammered not having a rebuttal this time.
"You're incapable of doing anything Schlatt let someone help you for fucks sake-"
"I'd rather die alone than sit here and be lectured by the likes of you!" Schlatt yelled.
"You are going to die alone, old man!" Quackity spoke up. "That's what they're trying to tell you!" 
"You shouldn't be giving me a lecture! Im the mother fucking president! I should be talking, but apparently its not fucking work-" 
"IF YOU LIKE SO MUCH TALKING YOU DON'T NEED ME I'M LEAVING!" You interrupted him and stomped down the hallway for the second time today.
As you walked down the hallway you heard a faint "wait" from Schlatt on the floor. You stopped and looked back to see Schlatt looking at you with some sort of realization in his eyes. Quackity was standing over him shaking his head.
"You know what? I don't even know why I helped you. Probably for power, but I don't need you for that." Quackity walked away towards your way. "Go ahead and die alone like you said old man." 
Quackity caught your gaze and he smiled and shook his head again. He finally reached where you were standing and started talking to you.
"Maybe this isn't a good time, maybe it is. But I am joining Pogtopia. Wilbur said he needs a lot of people for this to work so consider this an invitation." He gave you a thin lipped smile and walked past you giving you a good look at Schlatt, laying fully on the ground.
"Y/N wait, just hold on for a second." Schlatt said while on his side, not even bothering to look at you.
You didn't say anything and followed Quackity's path, down the hallway and out of the door. Behind you, you could only hear the distant groans and pleas of the drunken man behind you. You tried your best to help and that's all you could do. But you couldn't watch that man die.
Taglist: MCYT Imagines: @annshit @bobaducky @malfoysslutt @alec-lost-bee @egorldevi
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kashimos-hajime · 3 years
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no regrets (8/8) | r.b.
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summary: For the first time, he thinks of a future he could have, and someone who loves him, and there’s something bright in his heart. Or, Reiner finally understands what peace is.
WARNINGS: MANGA SPOILERS!!! angst, mentions of violence, we get our happy ending :) pairing: reiner braun x fem!reader word count: 6.7k
a/n: welcome to the last chapter!! thank you so much for being on this journey with me. there are a few callbacks to previous chapters so see if you can catch ‘em all heheh 
masterlist
crossposted on ao3 x
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Few months ago ymir asked if I could let her write one last letter to krista, and I did let her. I stood over her shoulder the whole time, watching her pen down all this sappy shit and I kept thinking about you the whole time, behind those walls. What you were doing, what you were thinking. Maybe if you thought about me. I dont know.
I’m starting to see the appeal of wrting what youre not strong enough to say to a persons face. I never thought Id find myself on the other end of this stick. for some reason, I thought that I could stop myself, resist the temptation, or maybe that I didnt feel for you as strong as I thought I did once I was away from you. I was wrong.
What do I even say? I mean shit, I can barely see, my limbs are barely in tact, and all of it—shiganshina, it haunts me, even though I cant really remember it that well. Half of it goes black and then I remember hearing your voice, I remember Bertholdt, I remember you screaming.
You couldve walked away. why didnt you walk away? It doesn’t make sens. Why did you think to cut me out? Why did you try to save me? Im trying to make it make sense inmy head. It’s not working.
Fuck I dont know what I was thinking when I asked for a paper and pen. Why am I asking you questions? Its not like ill ever understand. At this point, I think it’s pity thats letting Zeke let me waste ink on trying to write straight. He doesn’t know what im doing, but thats better this way. Better than sleeping—better than eating. I just wanna talk to you and this is as close as I can get. Its my own damn fault, but I dont care. 
I completed my mission. After this, im done. ill give up the rest of my term. I dont want any of that glory anymore. I dont want to be a hero. Im just done.
Fuck, my head hurts so much. I dont really know if what im saying is making sense. Im hoping you never read this.
im sorry. I wish I could explain it to you some day, but chances are, ill be dead soon. Whether for treason or because they need to pass on the Titan, and I wont be able to see you again. Which means youll never know how sorry I am. How much I
Thats okay. I dont think youd believe me now even if I did say anything.
I remember your dream to live by the lake with a bunch of kids. You know I started to wonder if youd mind if they were our kids, not just some orphans who needed a home. I’d imagine one of them with blond hair. Imagine them swimming in the lake.
Never told you that was my dream too. Never knew i could have a dream of my own, something only I wanted and not just something to further marleys damn agenda, til I knew you. Sounds stupid but its true.
I think youd like Marley, if we weren’t sworn enemies. Just want you here with me right now. make me sleep easier knowing you’re there when I wake up. 
Dont want secrets either. Fuck I miss you so bad. I feel s o tired all the time. 
I rember when i first saw you all could think about was how you were the most prettiest girl id ever seen. I don know if you know thats why I tried to distance myself. Knew I couldn’t get distracted from my mison. happened anyway. Wish I could tell you that. 
wish I could tell you I love you. Wish I could see the look on yur face when you try lobster for the first time. Youd love it. Not sweet, but tons of desserts here too.
Shit. And the ring on your finger. ill put a ring on your finger. I promised. i swear ill go home and buy a ring for the moment I see you again. Might not be pretty but will do the best I can.
Olnly wnat only wnat only want to see you again and beg for your forgiveness. Let you know if I had a choice, I wouldnt have done it. Would take it all back, nd stay. i wanted to stay, stay with you and the others. I used to want to spend the rest of my life in those walls, now I think im sick and tired of them dividing people who arent even that differnet.
My eyes are beginning to burn. Worse because the skin is sitll growing back. Fucking hell god I miss you. miss your smile more.
I know i dont deserve your forigvneess forgiveness. I want you to be angry with me. I deserve as much, and I cant ask you to, but 
With love,
Rienr
You fold the letter, eyes closing as your fingers trace where the ink bled, the old tear stains wrinkling the paper beyond measure. Some are older than others, and you trace over his name again, your eyes burning, your throat tight enough to suffocate.
You’re leaning against the wall as everyone disembarks. They had taken Eren off first, Hange and the others getting ready to depart for the city while Connie and Jean lift a covered stretcher too white for the vivacious girl that lays dead beneath it.
They pass you silently, and you catch sight of a certain captain approaching, his pale eyes nearly swallowed by the shadows haunting his face.
“Captain,” you say, straightening. Placing the letter back into the tin, you slide it back into your pocket as he folds a green jacket over his shoulder. You give him a nod.
“You made it out alive,” Levi observes. He stops beside you, eyes more focused on what’s ahead. No doubt he’s not looking forward to having to take Zeke to wherever he needs to go—somewhere far, far away from Eren. You cross your arms. 
“It’s good to see you, too, Levi,” you intone. Sighing, you step in beside him and look out at the Walls you can’t see in the distance, your entire body wrought with a strange fatigue that’s only sewn into muscles by adrenaline leaving the body. “I think I’m going to stay.” He tilts his head to you, eyes flickering to your face, and you mirror the shift, your arms tightening. “I can’t leave this unfinished. Not after Liberio.”
“The farm will have to be abandoned,” he points out. “The kids, too.”
“I’ll make sure I move them where someone can take care of them. Somewhere north, far away from the brothers,” you assure, although still, your heart begins to sink and you close your eyes, exhaling deeply. “I have to hope they understand.”
Levi only nods, and you open your eyes as he wordlessly takes the jacket off his arm and offers it to you. Grasping it wearily, you open your mouth to ask questions but he only sets off, back towards the cabin where Zeke is still being held, and you snap your jaws shut, looking down at the jacket.
When you unfold it, you swallow the hard rock in your throat at the blue and white slipping beween the folds of olive green before there’s a sharp whistle. Looking up, you see the carriages already beginning to load up, and you glance back at the door where the captain has disappeared through before jogging down the ramp.
You slither your arms through the sleeves and shuffle the fabric along your frame as something thumps against your thigh, and you frown, reaching down into your pocket and coming into contact with something smooth and hard.
Withdrawing, your lips part at the green bolo tie gleaming in the lights of the port and you, without another thought, pull it over your head, letting it fall against your breastbone. 
“For your services to the Survey Corps.”
There’s no time to second-guess now. No time to debate.
“Good to have you back,” Hange murmurs as you walk towards the carriage taking Mikasa, Armin, and the others back to the city. You tug the lapels of the jacket tighter around yourself and flash them a weak smile. 
The Wings of Freedom on your arm feel like a brand, and it prickles your skin as you climb in after them.
.
Distantly, he remembers flashes. 
Eren reaching forward for Zeke, the exhaustion ripping him every which way, the sound of ODM gear whizzing in his ears as he tries to make sense of the punctured sensation in his armour.
How he had softened his nape, intending to die then. At least, let his death have some meaning, he had thought. Let him make one last effort to repent for everything he did to Paradis, and to his friends who’d been more family than his own mother.
He slips in an out of consciousness for the next few days. He doesn’t know what is up, what is down, but he does recognize his surroundings blearily, the way his head spinning somehow slowing when he presses his temple to the wooden floor.
How can he almost hear your voice in the echoes of the panels, countered by someone who almost sounds like Annie before he drifts off again.
When Reiner finally regains consciousness again, he wakes to someone crouched down in front of him. Jerking up, he lets out a sound before a palm slaps over his mouth and your face is shoved against his own.
“Shut it,” you whisper fiercely. “It’s just me.”
Your name muffled by your own hand, his eyes begin to burn and you lift your palm away as he sits up and you draw back. You’re dressed in clothes that look like they’ve seen better days but you’re relatively uninjured as you pull back. New lines adorn your face—one of the many prices of their damned war—and you only look exhausted. 
Sitting up, Reiner’s whole body groans as he leans against the wall, but he can’t tear his eyes away from you. Your hands are hovering around his body like you’re scared he’ll collapse and there’s a fracture in your mask.
Something gleams on your finger and his eyes flit to it, his heart lurching when he realizes what it is.
The ring. You’re wearing it. You…
For a moment, a glimmer of their teenage selves shine through and he wants to reach for it—touch it so he can remember what it’s like to be happy. He thinks it’s an awful like now; the swelling of his heart so big he can’t breathe; the way his lungs are static in his chest; how he can’t say anything because there are so many words that want to come out first.
“You’re here. You’re alive,” he finally settles on raspily. Your eyes glint with a youthful pain as you nod.
“So are you.” 
And he doesn’t know who moves first—you or him. Nothing is forgiven as their bodies crash in an embrace that lacks grace, but they cling onto another like the world is ending and they’re the only ones left standing. 
Maybe they are.
He buries his face in your neck, and your arms are so tight around him your fingers dig into his shoulders as your body melts against his and his skeleton sags in his own body.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers against your skin, eyes fluttering shut. “I‘m sorry.” A hand against your neck and an arm around your waist, he wraps his legs around your own and traps you against him. You seem to only sink into him even more.
Is that enough? I don’t want you to hate me.
You suck in a breath, and then it comes out shuddering. “You can spend the rest of what life you have left repenting for making me fall in love with a man who was always supposed to die.”
Softly, in his mind, your voice cools the searing heat of hatred inside him. It’s enough. It has to be.
“I’m sorry,” he says again. It’s like they’re the only words he knows. He can’t remember ever meaning it this much. For him dying, for making you love him, for ever coming to Paradis. For loving you. For loving you. “I’m so sorry.”
“I know. I know.” Your face turns to press against his own. Your lips brush against his jaw and his eyes slide shut, tears rolling down his face. “I read every single one of your letters.” Drawing back, you cup his face in his hands and your fingers smear his tears all over his cheeks as his palm rests against your neck. Thumb stretching up to touch your chin, he feels sobs shuddering in his throat at seeing you again—looking at him almost like you used to. “I can’t begin to understand, but I know you are. And I know you love me.”
Choking, he gasps, “You should hate me.”
“Yeah. Yeah, I should.” You’re crying, too, voice thick, tears stubborn on your cheeks as you give him a watery smile. “I should hate Marley, too. But it’s beautiful there. The water by the sea… I want to be there with you next time. We need to go together, before you leave me alone, okay?”
Reiner doesn’t quite hear you. He hears Marley, and beautiful, and he’s never noticed how beautiful you are when you cry, but right now, it’s the simplest truth he knows. 
“Okay.”
When you tilt his chin up and kiss him softly, something inside him explodes from the gentleness that makes him want to crack in the palm of your hands. It sears him from the inside out, makes him grab onto you like you’ll disappear—this is another dream, isn’t it? 
It has to be. 
You can’t be kissing him again after four years. He doesn’t deserve it. You’re an illusion, something his mind made up to deal with the pain. He’s finally cracked for good, just like Bertholdt said he would, and he’s the devil, not you.
But then you pull away just for a moment to smile, eyes barely open as you look at him with a sad tenderness that wraps him in an invisible embrace, and he is faced with the heart-wrenching reality. 
The sky is falling, you are holding him tightly again, and they’ve lost their years. But you’re here. With him. 
He knows that this isn’t a dream as he feels the coolness of the silver band on your finger and the heaviness in how he knows he hasn’t repented a damn thing. 
Why him?
As you run your hand through his hair, you press their foreheads together.
“And I do want a family with you, by the water if you’d like,” you murmur fleetingly against his mouth and his eyes widen, cheeks burning, entire face crumbling as he turns his face in to your shoulder, crushing you in another brace. Sobbing into your neck, his fingers dig into your shoulders, wrap tight around your waist, squeeze you so close he isn’t sure where you end and he begins and your lips brush the shell of his ear. “Reiner, say it.”
“Please,” he whispers thickly into your skin, and you cradle the back of his head with a hand. He’s nothing more than shambles. “Please, don’t go.”
“I’m not letting you out of my sight again,” you promise. His breath is hot against his own face as you pull his head back and cradle his face again, thumbs brushing away the tears from his red face. “Just a bit more. A bit more and then it’ll be all over, you know?”
And he understands, then, what you want from him. Struggling for breath, for his lungs to stop seizing in his aching chest, he cups your face that turns into his palm on instinct, your face wet with your own tears as, for a moment, they try to pretend this isn’t where they really are.
Like they’re still in that afternoon in Trost, a thousand years ago, with the kids flipping coins into the water fountain and a cream bun between them. Like they’re under the tree, apple juice on your wrist and his lips on yours.
Like it’s those trips to the city, the walks on the Walls. Honey is dripping down your chin and he’s pretending he doesn’t want to kiss you, or there’s grease smeared on his forehead, and you’re reaching up to wipe it off his skin.
Like a thousand moments all at once, and he nods to himself as you brush your hand over his temple. The world outside is startlingly quiet, as if the universe itself stopped everything itself to watch this moment, and Reiner takes a breath that bruises his sternum before he’s holding your left hand where that ring still sits.
And slowly, he pulls it off, whispering as firmly as he can. He’s sure he fails—he’s shaking all over from your presence alone.
“When this is over, I’ll put that ring back on your finger. I promise.”
The smile that splits your face is dazzling. It’s the smile he’s missed since the day he left it.
“We have a lot of things to work out, Reiner Braun.”
And your fingers barely brush his jaw before you’re leaning to press a sweet kiss against his mouth. It’s sugary on his tongue, like honey and apple slices.
.
Your back is warmer when you’re pressed up against Reiner’s. The ship is quiet, and their pinkies are just barely hooked on oen another’s as you stare blankly at the empty space between Connie’s boots. You don’t speak, and Reiner’s gaze is only on you. He can’t look at anything else now that you’re back by his side again.
There’s a cut on your cheek from the fight just half an hour ago, and there’s dried blood along your hands where your knuckles had split open, but everyone seems too exhausted to clean themselves up. 
Reiner himself has a blanket pulled over his shoulders, and he sighs, slouching in his own sack of flesh.
Your head tilts towards him, enough that your temple presses against his cheek. His eyes close and he leans into your touch. Not a word passes by, but their hold on each other’s hands tightens. And Reiner thinks. 
For the first time, he thinks of a future he could have, and someone who loves him, and there’s something bright in his heart. Something that hasn’t burned since he left Marley as a child.
Reiner thinks he doesn’t want to die anymore. He doesn’t want to miss you for another moment.
.
Raising from the steam, you groan, your hands searing from the inside out as you touch your face where you swore every inch of your skin had been stretched, but nothing seems out of sorts as you glance around. Everywhere, all your friends who had turned just as you had are in various states of disoriented. The air is still hissing, crackled with surprised screams and shouts of names as people look for one another across the field. 
It smells like cooked meat and burnt hair, a none-to-pleasant mixture that turns your stomach.
Getting to your feet, you wipe at your face, trying to ignore the weird feeling underneath your nails and the ache seizing your muscles. Trying to ignore the remnants of Eren lingering like a ghost that won’t really leave you alone. You shiver, and a strange cold sweat takes over your body.
He had taken you to the sea, except it wasn’t the shore you were familiar with. There was a cabin nearby, with blonde children running, chasing after one another and a man with golden hair standing on the porch, firewood in his arms as he calls out silently. Or maybe you had been standing too far to hear.
“Eren… where are we?”
“Wherever you think you are,” he had said. “I just brought you where you wanted to be.”
A voice, quiet as a memory, catches your attention. “Here let me help.” A soft wind blows throw the mist, cooling your scorching face as you feel a presence stand behind you.
“Oh, thank you.” You look over your shoulder to see a tall boy, and your heart stops. Mouth dropping open, you stare at his foggy image, but he only smiles fully, a smile so tender it reaches every corner of you as you stumble forward, fingers stretching for him. “Bertholdt!”
His smile grows only that much more, eyes squinting a bit and a flash of teeth before he’s looking at your hand that passes through his chest. All at once, all the hope built up in your chest crumbles, and your hand snaps back, trembling just before him. He lays a hand over your own and your eyes begin to burn, tears slipping down your cheeks.
And then, softly, you barely whisper, “I miss you.”
Bertholdt’s smile merely grows, as if to say everything he couldn’t say before. As if to show he’s at peace now—that your last memory together isn’t every part of him, and your lips press together, trying to stop yourself from shaking.
 Shadows form in the fog, and together, the two look as a freckled boy and another girl steps out of the mist a distance away, beaming like the sun. Connie and Jean stagger to their feet just behind you, and your heart lurches into your throat when you recognize them.
“Marco! Sasha!”
Someone calls your name and you turn around just as arms scoop you up and you let out a surprised noise before settling into Reiner’s arms. Looking over your shoulder to look at Bertholdt, your heart only sinks.
He smiles and Reiner lets out a sharp breath beside you, settling you down. “Bertholdt…” More shapes emerge. A shorter boy accompanied by another taller one, both alike in their features. You recognize one as the Jaw Titan holder before Falco, but the other—
“Marcel!” Reiner chokes out the name, hand stretching out to the fog, but the boy merely tilts his head and waves.
Closing your eyes, hot tears streak over your cooling flesh as you fling your arms around Reiner again and press your face into his neck. He cradles the back of your head, and he feels… somehow weaker, but still, there is that impassable strength in his core that wraps around you as he watches over your shoulder, still clinging on despite your clothes hot enough to burn.
I’m alive, I’m alive, I’m alive, I’m alive. It’s the only thought in your head. Your last clear memory had truly been the others taking flight, and the pain that had ripped apart your body before sewing it back together again in unjust proportions. Your limbs had been too big, your blood racing too warmly through your head as your legs pumped but your brain screamed to stop. 
Your fingers had sank into Reiner’s legs to pull him down and you had watched—watched Jean take a bite out of him—
You shiver and Reiner’s arms tighten around you instinctively, constricting enough to let you know that his attention isn’t on you quite yet.
Boots shifting on the ground tentatively, your knees feel gummy as you draw back long enough to look at him. He still looks over your shoulder, and you follow his gaze to watch the mist retreat. Bertholdt and the other two boys fall into a pool of fog, and your lips part in a farewell, but it’s already too late.
He’s gone.
A wind sweeps through the battlefield, tickling your sweating neck and cooling your boiling blood.
“Hey,” a soft voice croaks.
Their eyes meet in tandem. He regards you softly, like you are the reason the sun rises and the stars hang at the sky. Overwhelmed, you can only cup the back of his neck and pull him into a deep kiss. Your other hand along his jaw, it takes all you can not to pull him into a bone-crushing embrace that’ll send them both to the ground.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” you whisper hushedly against his mouth, throat swelling as he lets out a soft noise of surprise as you pull him into another tight hug. You don’t care that you’re crushing him, just that his heart is pounding against your own chest. “I couldn’t stop myself. I’m so sorry.” 
His eyes widening, he wraps his hands around your wrists and pulling you back just enough to kiss your fingers that crumple against his mouth. Clasping one of his hands in both of your own, you close your eyes and he uses his free fingers to brush the tears off your cheek before reaching into some dented tin you don’t recognize.
Eyebrows furrowing, you feel the heat leave your entire body, sapping your energy too, and your eyes snap to Reiner who steps back, cracking it open and presenting it to you. 
“You’re not the one who has to be sorry. I don’t think I’m the Armoured Titan anymore,” he whispers. “I don’t know if I get the rest of my life back, but either way, I want to spend the rest of it repenting to you in any way I can, if you’ll allow me to.” A weak smile. “Truth.”
Your throat closes up, and you stare down at the ring so protected, gleaming despite the destruction around them. It looks almost out of place amongst the grime smearing your skin, the sweat drenching their skin, the smell of blood and metal clinging to their clothes, but Reiner only watches you with a tenderness you can barely meet. It’s so overtly overflowing with devotion that your heart is resting on your tongue, seizing control of everything. 
You barely nod, chewing on your lip, trying not to cry even harder as his eyebrows rise in relief and he lets out a long sigh.
He lifts the ring out of the tin, snapping it closed before sliding the band back home onto your finger and all at once, everything floods you. The exhaustion, the pain, the hunger, thirst, grief wrapping around your bones and chaining you to the ground.
It’s over.
The minute he put the ring on your finger, it would mean it was over. No more blood, no more fighting.
Just like he promised.
You barely croak out his name before you fall to your knees. You trust him to catch you, and he does.
[THREE YEARS LATER]
Just after the Rumbling had stopped, you had gone back to Paradis alone and came back with three children to a man who was still uncertain in a world that was changing. 
Since then, you’ve learned so much about the world, about yourself, about Reiner. 
How he’s seized by night terrors even now, just like you, and how one thing that soothes it is going out for a walk while the sun still simmers below the horizon, the sky a dark navy blue spliced with orange rays. The intricate details like him making a point to tie his own tie because his father never taught him how or the way he has to chug his coffee so he has enough energy to get through the day.
And some days are horrible, haunting, but now, it is far outweighed by the good. He teaches Xav how to dress smart, takes the girls out shopping. Sometimes, he’s spotted around Liberio with a flame-haired boy riding his shoulders, you trailing behind hiding a smile behind some ice-cream.
Different nations, foods, cultures surround you now—citizens of countries coming to settle down roots, spread cuisine to Marley. The idea before, of humans so different than you but still similar at the root of it all, existing, still blows your mind. The technologies that you had never seen before, languages you’d never heard, sights you’d never seen, had all swarmed you as you stepped into a new world with him.
But there is always one thing you’ll come back to.
Leaning against the railing in the port city Reiner told you was the harbour he had left twelve years ago, and returned to seven years ago, you watch the clouds travel in slow drags across the pale blue canvas hung high above your head. The water spans for as far as you can see, glimmering under the sun and gorgeous enough to take your breath away. You pull at your coat across your chest absently, ignoring the tender growl of your stomach. 
Breathing in the salty wind, you feel your chest expand at the litle fishing boats a little ways out.
Reiner was right. You don’t get sick of the sea. You never will—not of this much water. You still remember the first time you had swam in it, the salt-water making your hair crisp, the cold sweat forming on your your sun-warmed skin.
You feel a hand on your shoulder. Looking up, you spot blonde hair and warm eyes and smile. Your heart flutters a bit. You shift on your feet.
“Hey.”
“Hey.” Reiner leans down beside you, and you clasp your hands, letting the sea wind curl against your neck. Reaching to slip his hand in between yours, he sighs and you lean against his shoulder, glancing at their pile of interlaced fingers. “Are you okay?”
“Of course,” you whisper, although even still, you can feel a numbing at your fingertips. You remember what it was like to be a Titan, even now. The sensations haunt you—flashes of your own mutated body, the grotesque meat of your hands sinking into the ankles of the man beside you, the bloodcurdling roar spilling out of your throat.
Glancing at their fingers, you watch the flashes of silver of the rings play in the sunlight, your band now having a matching counterpart on his own hand. You grasp his hands tightly, bringing them up to your lips and his own grip tightens when you dust a kiss gently along his scarred knuckles.
“No,” you finally say at length. “I’m not okay. Going back to Paradis makes me nervous as hell, but we’ll manage.” He nods slowly, and you let go of his hands to wrap your arms around his neck. His own encircle your waist, pulling you flush against him and your eyes close at the familiar warmth—a warmth you’ve woken up next to most days for the past three years. 
“Have you eaten yet?” he murmurs, and your fingers play with the soft edges teasing at your pads as his nose presses against your cheek. Your eyes flutter at the soft heat emanating from his skin, and you shake your head, melting against him. With one arm still around you, he slants his body away from just enough to pull a bag out of his pocket and it crinkles as he hands it to you. Taking it, you frown and look inside.
A cream bun. You can’t help the crumbling in your expression and Reiner holds your face in his hands carefully, kissing the corner of your mouth.
“Let’s stay positive,” he whispers. “We don’t know the situation until we get there and Historia briefs us.”
“I know,” you whisper and his entire expression eases at your words. His eyes gaze at you as if you’re the sole centre of his universe, and he cups your jaw more insistently, pulling you in for a gentle kiss, one you ease into, your eyes fluttering shut as his tongue traces the seam of your mouth. Laughing, you feel his little nose scrunch and your heart bounds up into your throat as he pulls back only to kiss you again, softer this time.
“Get a room!” A sharp female voice ruins their moment and you pull back just enough to see a red-headed boy running towards them and Reiner crouches down just in time to scoop Xavier up.
“When are you getting married?” he demands. “I was promised cake when you guys got married.”
“I dunno. When you move out of the house I guess,” you tease and Xavier pouts, rubbing at the side of his nose with the heel of his palm.
“Besides, you got cake for your seventh birthday, buddy,” Reiner groans as the boy twists in his arms. “You’re getting heavy. What are you feeding him?” he adds, smiling roguishly at you and you roll your eyes as Alina and Anya approach, sun hats protecting them from the glaring sun. Alina, grocery bags in hand, waves. Anya, who’d been the one to shout, tucks her coin purse back into her bag before flashing you a great big smile.
Only fifteen and seventeen. You can barely recall what it’s like being that young anymore, but you’re grateful they didn’t spend it the way you did. They get to know beauty, and no limits at all. The former comes naturally, the latter is partially because Reiner spoils them rotten.
Alina picks a flower with velvety purple petals from a bouquet she cradles in her arm, extending it to you.
“For good luck,” she says. “And protection.” Your heart melts at her words and you pause for a moment, looking from the gorgeous bloom to Reiner, occupied with the boy in his arms making silly faces at him. Then, without another moment, you sneak the flower behind his ear and he reaches up immediately to hold it against his head, turning to you in surprise. 
“To protect the both of us,” you explain.
“Thank you. I’ll be extra careful now.” He looks at the girls, setting his free hand on Alina’s head heavily and she flushes, smiling grandly. “You three behave while we’re gone, alright?”
You nod. “Listen to Levi.” 
“And listen to your sister,” Reiner adds to Alina and Xavier. The former rolls her eyes, the latter sticks out his tongue. “I’ll miss you.”
This is their home—their family that tumbles together into a huge hug, and you can’t help but stand back, watching how they all seem to merge into one unit, unaware of where one part of their reach ends and another begins.
As Reiner pulls you into the hug, your heart soars through your body, effortlessly pounding in your throat and in your fingers and everywhere at once. Liquid heat pools everywhere as Xavier screws up his face when you kiss his cheek, the same way Reiner does after he’s eaten something sour.
And maybe it’s a bit different, or a bit broken, the shards of their bloody history still poking at their heels whenever they think you’ve forgotten them, and it’s most definitely not perfect, but you would rather have it like this then anything else.
“Hey, guys!” Breaking apart, the family look over to see Armin, Annie, and Pieck walking over. Gabi and Falco meander a little bit behind, pushing Levi in his wheelchair, and Jean and Connie are running not far behind them, shouting at one another. You stifle a laugh and Xavier shimmies out of Reiner’s hold to run towards them. The girls follow after him, trying to hold back their runs but the closer they get, you can tell the more frantic they are to say goodbye.
So this is what they’ve made a peace. Something, you hope, is good.
Annie bypasses them quickly, making her way over to you and you survey her face as Reiner squeezes your shoulder, walking over to their friends. Her blue eyes are fixed on your face, and you feel your lips curving into a smile as she shoves her hands in her pockets. Her hair is swaying in the wind, gleaming flaxen, and you remind yourself, not for the first time, that Armin and Annie’s kids, if they ever decide they want them, will be gorgeous.
Hope for the future, and all that.
She stops in front of you, tucking a strand behind her ear.
“So,” she says at length, “we’re going back to Paradis. I’m surprised you decided to come with us. You don’t owe any of us anything.”
“I know. But… you’re my best friend. You do the talking, I fly the getaway plane, right?”
“Yeah. There used to be a time when it probably would’ve been the opposite.”
You nod, and they stand in silence for a moment, watching each other. Two women who should not have been friends, but were against all odds. You don’t think you would be here today if it weren’t for Annie.
Your heart lurches and you take a step forward just as she does, her mouth open to say something. You throw your arms around her and she lets out a noise in surprise as you close your eyes. Arms coming underneath yours, her hands dig into your shoulders and you smile against soft hair as she sighs, easing into your hug.
“Finally working together on an actual assignment,” you mumble and her head tilts as her small frame shifts, a hand patting you on the back as a sign for you to back up. “Just like we always said we would.” 
Bluntly: “Just don’t do anything stupid.”
“You, too.” Pulling back, the two look at one another for another soft moment before you remember the bag in your hand and you shift the bun up in the bag, extending it towards her. “Want some?” Her eyebrows rise in faint delight, before she’s reaching over, pinching and tearing a piece off. 
You grin and do the same and you gesture for her to come stand by the rails with you, stuffing the bag into your coat pocket. Leaning against the warm metal again, you hear a seagull call. The plane you’ll be flying to Paradis floats on the water, the technicians giving it the final check before you take off.
If anything goes wrong while you help prepare and oversee accommodations for the rest of the ambassador group, you’ll remember to fire the black signal flare, but you trust Historia. You trust your friends.
You glance over at them, all laughing, and you notice that the flower has gone from Reiner to Pieck, who’s taking it out of her dark hair to tuck it into Jean’s, and his cheeks redden as he brushes it more securely behind his ear.
Annie catches your attention again, pointing out idly that they’ll have to separate soon when they finish with the plane, and you tell her to just wait a couple minutes more as Reiner catches your gaze. Setting Xav, who has somehow wormed his way back into his arms, down, he walks back over to you, and his hand trails purposefully over your back before resting at the nape of your neck, a reassuring weight on your body.
“You guys okay?”
“We’re fine,” Annie replies. “You have a clingy boyfriend,” she tells you. 
“I think it’s charming.”
She rolls her eyes. Reiner smiles, and you pat the railing beside you—silent invitation. He leans in on your other side, clasping his hands and watching the fishermen pull themselves to shore, singing a tune to each other—one familiar to all three of them and one that you wish you could get out of your head. 
“Soon may the Wellerman come…”
A faint breeze tickling at your fingertips as a sharp call for embarkment splits the harbour, you simply sigh and look over at Reiner. “I just want these last few moments to last.” His eyes meet yours, and he leans forward to press a kiss between your eyes. Annie lets out a soft noise of disgust and you bump your hip against her as Reiner pulls back.
Closing your eyes and lifting your head to the wind, you can almost imagine the one person missing standing on the other side of Annie, dark hair like spun, stained bronze and eyes like warm chocolate. He’d smile and tell them not to worry in that sincere way of his that makes you believe every word he says—as long as they were careful, they wouldn’t walk into any traps.
Your chest aches, and your lips tug into a heart-wrenching smile as you begin to sing along. Reiner slips a hand in between yours, pressing his temple against your head and you loop your other arm through Annie’s.
She rests her head on your shoulder, listening to your voice, eyes on the sailors bringing in their haul below them. Reiner hums the shanty softly, distractedly, eyes cast across the sea.
You tilt your head up to the sky, at the stars you cannot see but will join one day, and smile.
259 notes · View notes
mako-neexu · 3 years
Text
ToT stuff i cant get out of my mind bcs CBT ended and im so sosososososo upset
1. Artem Wing
-everything u want in a husband
-best cook omfg
-he’s so gentle
-guides you but lets you find the answers on your own
-knows how to shoot (gosh his SR for that made me squeal)
-will stay by your side until you get better
-Professor Neil Hume pls stop hiding youre making him sad
-he deserves attention and fun
-Celestine: #1 MC x Artem shipper lmao
-his SMILE
-blushing artem makes me wanna go jump off a cliff for him
-i mean who wouldnt fall for him?
2. Marius von Hagen
-hes so CUTE WHEN HES BLUSHING GOD
-he’s so hot what the fuck youve been blessed by the gods
-according to one of his lines in the chat for the conversations, he gets jealous when we talk about “Z” lmao
-will legit buy you a whole store for u (or arcade lmao)
-even if a lot of people will jump at the chance to slander him, he wont do that to others, instead he’ll help them and even give second chances
-he’s very kind
-a teasing flirt though thats for sure
-his art skills are no joke
-i cant stop staring at his che
-he admires people who will drop everything for the sake of a dream/goal
-did i mention that hes so cute when he blushes?
3. Vyn Richter
-HIS EYES!!! THE WAY THE WRITERS DESCRIBE HIS EYES IN EVERY SCENE I SWEAr
-jelly boy 🥺 he just wants MC for himself (carl would get fucking obliterated if he were really trying to catch MC’s attention sifnfkfnekdnfn)
-will absolutely do everything for your hugs EXCEPT ASK FOR ONE (cough false tears cough)
-even if he doesntknow a lot of stuff, he’s willing to learn and be reliable for MC 🥺
-hes too embarrassed to admit that he doesnt know how to do pipe maintenance thats okay youre doing great vyn 🥺
-freaking knows and is good at polo
-knows gardening (his knowledge of flowers....my god)
-his body temp is low that he needs MC because shes warm enough that it leaves him craving for more (YESYEYSYEYSYS TOUCH STARVEDILY)
-when MC is beside him it feels like he’ll go through any lengths for her skfnrkfjrkfnfkxxn
-he makes SWEETS i
-he’s very handsome that every where he goes people just turn their heads and whisper abt his good looks
-he’s also inherited his dad’s love at first sight KAKSSKSKFJFJ however he wants to prove it first. HAH by trying to get close to MC, your nightly self examination on the dictaphone gets shorter because all you can think abt are the event prior to what happened between you and MC KSFNFJFJ youre so cute
4. Luke Pearce
-cutest childhood friend
-very sweet AAAAAAA
-everytime he says “My Watson” i melt
-he’s a very capable detective! as expected of a holmes fanatic lol
-he’s also mysterious since he doesnt have a lot of info despite living in Stellis which makes me wanna get to know him more
-his SMILE MAKES ME ASKGWOAKFNTOFYIWN
-he also remembers all his memories with MC therefore he often recalls a lot of stuff during their childhood and highschool days, seeing a smol luke is just so cute urGhH
-cheeks. pinch. pinch.
-his antique shop is so cool too i wanna explore and ask about it ekfnfkfnfjf
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honeykawa · 3 years
Text
Fly | Route: Tanaka Ryuunosuke
genre: mafia au, choose your own adventure
warnings: violence, suggestive themes but nothing graphic
word count: 3.1k
Fly Masterlist
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“I choose him”
You looked at the man who had been standing in the corner of the room with his arms crossed
“Tanaka get your ass moving and take them home. Pick them up in the morning and take them home from now on. Make sure they dont run away or itll be on your head”
“Got it boss”
The car ride to your apartment was filled with silence and the soft sound of music coming from the radio
You were too nervous to say anything
The growing feeling of anxiety in your chest made it almost hard to breath
You started to unconsciously grab at the area above your chest and your breathing became irregular
‘How did i get into this mess?’ ‘whats going to happen to me?’
These thoughts keep rushing through your head
“--hey are you okay?”
Tanaka pulled the car over so he could stop and assess just what was happening
And from the way he saw it...it looked like an anxiety attack
His panicked a little himself watching you like this he didnt even want to imagine the feelings rushing through you right now
He got you to control your breathing again and come down from your panic
“You good now?”
You nodded your head, still weary about being near this man
He could tell you were still on your guard with the way you wrapped your arms around your body, as if you were trying to make yourself smaller
“I know it seems rough right now but i swear itll be okay”
His voice was soft with you, something you didnt expect from someone in the mafia
The car ride after that went pretty smooth
“We’re here”
The ride went faster than you thought it would and you got out of his car before saying your goodbyes
“Ill pick you up in the morning...if you need me heres my card”
He held out his card to you as you slowly took it from his hands
“See you”
And with that he sped off as you went inside your apartment to go to bed, hoping that maybe this had all been a dream
Once tanaka got back to his apartment he immediately plopped himself onto his bed and covered his eyes with his arm while thoughts of you plagued his mind
‘Cute’
His arm fell down to his side and he just stared at the ceiling
“Get your shit together tanaka. Your job is to watch them, nothing more”
He rolled over to his side with thoughts of you fading as he drifted into sleep
You woke up to the sound of light knocking on your door
And as soon as you opened the door it finally set in that last night really did happen
“Are you ready to go?”
Tanaka took one look at you and let out a deep sigh knowing that you werent
“Ill give you fifteen minutes”
You nodded your head as you ran back into your room and changed into something work appropriate
Wait where were you working? What would be considered work appropriate?
Based off of what tanaka was wearing you assumed something business casual
When you came out you looked at tanaka to see if this was good enough and he just nodded his head and started walking back towards his car, opening the door for you to get in
“I talked it over with daichi and youll be working with me as my assistant”
Your eyes widened and he immediately knew what went through your mind
“No not like that! Like with actual business stuff you wont really have to do anything with the mafia”
His flailing around made you laugh a bit and lifted a weight off of your shoulders
Listening to you laugh was almost relaxing, his cheeks heating up from the mere sight of your carefree smile
He gave you a quick tour of the place and introduced you to the others if you ran into them but that was about it
As his assistant you really didnt do much
If anything it felt like he was just an over glorified babysitter
But you shuffled through the files he gave you and sorted them the way he wanted
Tanaka watched you from the corner of his eye while you both worked
It wasnt that he was worried you would do it wrong
But it was just last night that you had that anxiety attack right in front of him
“y/n do you want to go out?”
You looked up from your papers and looked at him in confusion
“Right now? And what do you mean by ‘go out’?”
A big smile appeared on his face
“Yeah right now! Lets go! And dont think too much of it”
He stood up and grabbed his wallet
You followed him and as you two rounded the corner of the block he held the door open to a small cafe
“Go ahead and order whatever you want its on me”
You were weary about being here
Would you two get in trouble for leaving like that?
Tanaka could see the worry still lingering on your face and rose his hand to gently pat your head
“Like I said its on me so dont worry about leaving the office ill take any repercussions if there are any”
The grin on his face took a weight off of your chest and you felt like the air around you wasnt so thick anymore
After getting back to the office no one had even noticed that you two had even left
Whos running this place??
The next few weeks seemed to be fine
It was almost like you lived a normal life and you werent being watched by the mafia
You and tanaka had grown closer and it was easier to talk to the others now
He treated you kindly and tried to understand your situation
Unlike the two interns who always berated you for not knowing where certain files were or would roll their eyes when you would flinch at sudden movements the first few days
But tanaka took it slow with you, doing little things so that youd be more comfortable
At first it was subtle
If you needed to go make a copy of something he’d suddenly need to go grab something from the copy room with you even if you insisted that you could get it for him
Or how he always tried to include you in conversations with others so you would get more comfortable around everyone
Tanaka grew to be someone who it was easy for you to be around
But that sense of calmness was quickly wiped away when you joined him on one of his...excursions
“Heres the case. Now give us what we want”
Tanaka held the case in front of him while you just watched from the car
Sure, he’d take you with him but he’d never let you actually get out
He didnt really want this to take too long
Especially since it was just him against a good handful of men
But the men he was making the trade deal with suddenly saw you in move in the car and locked eyes with you
His smile sent a chill down your spine formed on his face
“New deal: give me that hot piece of ass in the car and you have a deal”
Tanakas jaw clenched at the the disgusting words just said about you
“Im sorry but,”
You couldnt see tanakas face until he looked up at the man in front of him
The look on his face utterly terrified you
“I’ll kill you if you even try to put a hand on them”
Everyone stood there unmoving, too scared to move
Tanaka turned around and headed back to the car where you were
“Deals off if that wasnt clear”
But one of the other men moved towards him
“The fuck you mean its off!”
Tanaka easily evaded the man’s advance and took him down with only a quick few movements
“Anyone else want to try”
The question was simple enough but no one dared made eye contact with him as he got into the car and drove off
The car ride was quiet, youd never seen tanaka look like that before
It scared you
He scared you
Tanaka noticed your silence and reached a hand out to pat your head but his chest went heavy at the sight of you flinching
“Y/n?”
You knew he wouldnt hurt you but you couldnt stop the slight tremble
“Im sorry tanaka”
A weak smile appeared on his face
“It’s fine y/n. i’ll take you home, okay?”
You just nod your head and neither of you talk the rest of the ride
A few days go by and you can feel the distance between you and tanaka growing
Its so noticeable that the others in the office can feel the awkwardness between the two of you
Tanaka suddenly stood up from his seat which startled you but he quickly rose his hands
“Woah sorry didnt mean to scare you”
He said it with such a sad smile on his face that it almost hurt to even look at him
“Ill be back in a moment, gotta use the bathroom”
You nodded your head as he left and let out a sigh
You knew he was just doing business
This was his job
It just shocked you to see the man thats been so kind to you to look...like that
Tanaka on the other hand knew this would happen eventually
He washed his face in the sink and looked up at his reflection
‘Remember your place. They deserve better’
He wiped off his face before heading back to his office only to see you not there
His heart just drop not seeing you there
“y/n?!”
He was about to bolt out of there but as soon as he turned around he bumped right into you
You fell onto the ground and the papers you were holding scattered around everywhere
You both just looked at each other for a moment
“Tanaka--”
Before you could say anymore he scooped you into his arms and you could feel the slight tremble in his shoulders before he quickly pulled away once he realized what he was doing
“Sorry y/n i dont know what came over me”
He started help to pick up the papers you dropped but before he could get too far you pulled him into a hug
He was frozen on the spot at feeling your touch
The warmth from your hands made his heart beat erratically
“Im sorry tanaka”
Your arms tightened around him
Youd seen so many sides of him
How clumsy he was
How kind he could be
Youve also seen how scary he could be and honestly it still shocked you
But you want to believe in him
The him thats been nothing but gentle with you
You could hear him let out a shaky breath before pulling you into his chest
After that your relationship with tanaka went back to normal
Or at least as normal as it could have been
Ever since that day youve started to notice how your heart speeds up whenever you look at him
Or the butterflies in your stomach when he smiles at you
He was careful to not let you see the mafia side of things anymore
You appreciate the thought but youd be lying if you said it didnt worry you when he came to work bandaged or bruised
Today was one of those days where tanaka had picked you up with some visible injuries
The cut on his face looked fairly fresh and without realizing it you reached up and gently ran your thumb over it
“Um what are you doing y/n”
Not that tanaka hated this
He felt his heart flutter at your touch
“You know, i dont mind helping you if you need it”
He smiled and took your hand off of his face
“Thank you y/n but im fine”
Just knowing that you cared was enough for him
‘I love you’
They were words he couldnt say
But he knew this life wasnt for you and he couldnt force you to come live in it
A few weeks go by and you feel like every time you get close to him he pulls back to just keep it barely within the realm of just friends
But that was fine as long as you could stay near
It was another one of those days where tanaka was off doing mafia business so noya kept you company
He always had his guard up but he seemed to take a liking to you
“Do you like tanaka”
The question caught you so off guard you dropped your pen
You looked up at him
“Is it that obvious?”
Noya kept working on whatever was in front of him not even sparing you a glance
“Painfully”
You could feel your embarrassment rising
“But if it makes you feel any better i think he likes you too so promise me...make him happy”
Before you could say anything back noyas phone went off and he immediately answered
His eyes went wide and his head whipped towards you before hanging up and dragging you somewhere
“Noya! Where are we going?”
He rushed you into a car and he took the wheel before driving off to who knows where
“Where are we?”
He got out of the car and opened your door
You were at an apartment complex from the look of it
“We’re at tanakas apartment hurry up”
You immediately got out and followed after him and you almost felt your legs give out seeing the state tanaka was in
Bloody and battered
Hinata was sitting next to his bed with his arms crossed
“Idiot rushed in despite not having a gun”
Noya rolled his eyes
“You know he doesnt like carrying one whyd you let him go alone?”
“Not my fault he didnt stop to think”
They kept talking to each other and went into the other room leaving you both alone
His breathing seemed stable as he slept but tears escaped your eyes as you took a seat next to him
Noya left you with tanaka and told you to take care of him
“He’ll try to tell you hes okay. Dont listen to him hes a fucking liar so take good care of him for me”
It was funny but it almost sounded like a goodbye
Tanaka woke up later that night only to see you sitting next to him with tear stains on your cheeks
The thought of you shedding tears because of him both hurt and warmed his heart
He reached up to wipe your face despite the pain he felt
Your cheeks fit perfectly within his hand and he found it cute how you leaned into his touch subconsciously
He couldnt move much but this is all he needed
You woke up before he did that next morning and decided to make some breakfast for the both of you
When you came back in he was just waking up
“Good morning tanaka”
The smile on your face as the sunlight trickled in through the window made him feel at ease
This...this was the life he longed for
“Morning”
He tried to sit up but flinched while doing so
You rushed to his side and set the food down before helping him up
“Dont push yourself. Youre still pretty banged up”
You changed his bandages for him every evening after that
“I can do this myself you know”
He said it with a light laugh
He was starting to get back on his feet and regained most of his movement and strength
“I know but...id like it if you would rely on me just a bit more. I know i cant do much but i can do this”
He didnt say anything back to you after that
In all honesty he didnt want to do it himself
Every time your hand even brushed over his skin it felt like he was on fire
Even the scars that have long since healed throbbed at your touch
His heart beat so hard against his chest that he was afraid that you could hear it
“There all done! Hope that wasnt too bad”
‘Dont smile at me’
‘Youre far too precious’
‘I dont know what ill do if you look at me like that’
He really was planning to let you go, he was fine with just keeping you at an arms length away but now he knew he was in too deep
You got up to put the first aid kit away but he quickly pulled you into his bed with him and he held you tight against his chest
His face was buried into the crook of your neck
He didnt know what he wanted anymore
He wanted to keep you safe but he couldnt guarantee that with him being in the mafia
He hated it
This life wasnt the one he wanted anymore
The life he wanted was with you
Slowly, he rose his head to look at you
“Run away with me y/n”
Your eyes widened in pure shock
“What...what did you just say?”
You couldnt believe what he just said
His eyes were serious though
“Run away with me. I dont want this life anymore. I want to give you the life you deserve. One filled with happiness and laughter where you dont have to worry about things like if ill come home the next day or not. One where you arent targeted. I love you y/n. I love you so much so please, run away with me or so help me god ill just take you”
He held you so tight that it felt like he might break at any sudden movement
You wrapped your arms around him and held him gently against you so you wouldnt hurt any of his wounds
“Then take me away”
That was all tanaka needed to let go of any reservations that were holding him back up
He kissed you with everything hes been bottling up until this moment
Your lungs burned as pulled away, both out of breath but hungry for more
“I hope you know Im not letting you go. Youre stuck with me now”
You laughed and kissed his forehead
“I wouldnt have it any other way”
That night was spent in each others arms, both of you longing for the others touch and neither of you wanting to be apart for even a second
Noya visited the apartment a few days later only to be met with complete silence
A knowing smile appeared on his face as he shook his head
He knew wherever you two were you were both happy
Because he knew you would keep your promise to him
66 notes · View notes
m4rkiza · 3 years
Text
pile of headcanons
bunch of raihan/leon headcanon nonsense from my twit*r
theres alot under the cut, warning : its cheesy, also, i headcanon raihan calling leon "bubu"
Raihan is really good at baking and leon is great at cooking savory & spicy food, raihan likes spicy food and leon likes baked goods, they complete each other
Leon so thick and firm he'd be so good to hug and raihan took advantage of that, holding his bubu until leon complains or whine, yknow when ur pet looks so cute and u hug them, like that
leon contacts name on raihans phone is like "♥💖my bubu♥💕", but raihans contact name on leons phone is "Raihan" with capital R
raihan complained about it, showed leons contact name on his phone, leon is surprised bc he thought his contact name on raihans phone is just "Leon" or "Lee"
then leon changes rai's contact name too "🥰raihoney💖
leon doesnt look like the guy who'd be extra on hair and skin treatment, the reason his hair and skin (especially his hair) is unbearably soft and shiny is bc raihan kept reminding him to do so (and buying it)
sometimes leon act spoiled so raihan will do an entire haircare for him
yes raihan do it bc he loves leon unconditionally and he thinks leon deserves it
raihan has a dirty mouth and uses every swear word but for some reasons, around leon all he can say is "jerk" "ugly" and "dumb"
raihan does that bc all he remember when hes with leon is pet names and how-to-coo-and-woo-your-boyfriend
raihan being leons moral compass feels fitting, not bc leon is dumb but bc leon himself is swallowed by his own title and got the hero complex, making him selfless and have a hard time to say no
raihan is there to "what the fuck are you thinking, dont do that baby, you'll die"
but leon seems stubborn yes? he wont listen if people just say "no", he'd ask the reason why, and if the said person doesnt give a clear answer, he leaves but raihan always tries to explain him in full description, short & long lasting damage, consequence etc
so obviously leon listens, and as time goes by, raihan is.. his moral compass, in a way
raihan playfully growls while squeezing leons body parts but its definitely not so playful in leons mind
raihan always ask leon to wear his freshly-washed-hoodie at sunday so when he go to work at monday, his hoodie will smell like leon
raihans laugh is like "aha haha haha *low volume wheeze* phew heehee" and leon got a laugh that can trigger an earthquake
Raihan sneeze like a kitten while leon sneeze like a buldozer
Leon muffles his laugh by hugging raihan so it wont surprise anyone around them
leon demanding affection from raihan by giving him stupid empty threats
leon : Kiss me or ill
raihan : u will what
leon : i-i will shrink your hoodie and make it mine
raihan : no, now come here bubu
In reality, leon doesnt need to do "things" to get raihans attention, raihan told him he can just ask or "just sit on my lap or tug my shirt and ill cuddle and kiss you till the next day", but leons ego is too high for that so he does stupid shit instead
raihan is very loved by leons family bc surprisingly hes able to stop leon and hop from fighting
if u ask how, raihan simply pick up leon up and walk away
aihan is the only guy who leon will listen too and got called as the "champion tamer"
but all raihan do is just
raihan : bubu, no
leon : no..?
raihan : leon. no
leon : no...
then nag him softly while explaining the consequences, sometimes short and long term effect it depends on the situation
leon is stubborn, so it took sometime to convince him that his plan or an action he almost took to partake is very impulsive or doesnt give a good result
the thing is leon is not stupid, infact hes quite brilliant, therefore its hard to convince him if a person who tries to stop him doesnt have a similiar mind like he is, but thankfully theres raihan
for some reasons raihan is able to found leon in any occasion so the league staff ALWAYS calls him whenever leons gone
league staff : mr rai-
raihan : is it leon
league staff : yes
raihan : im on my way
leon likes to ask raihan for hairbands bc he kept losing them
raihan : bubu, isnt this your third time asking for them this week
leon : ....yes..?
raihan spoiling leon bc he feels he wants to make up for him, bc he wasnt available near leon when fought eternatus
leon follows raihan everywhere in the winter and kept pressing himself to him, whenever raihan question whats wrong leon just looked him in the eye and "im warming you up"
leon is small by raihans perspective but he hugs leon tight anyway
raihan is possessive of leon hes THAT hot, charismatic yet very adorable, leon is the one who keeps his chin up and soothe his fears, and hes the champion, everyone wants the champion, u think he'll let go that easily? no, never
and leon is probably possessive too, raihan is a hot nerd, affectionate and gentle, hes the one who push him to his best, the one who also stops him for doing too much, hes his source of comfort and he wont let go and wont let anyone take his raihan away from him for sure
10 years of friendship and healthy rivalry means 10 years of being on each others live, being one of the biggest contributor and supporter for the other, who pushes to the limit yet stopping when one is too close to the edge of the cliff
no matter if its platonic or romantic, they wont let anyone take their rival, friend and lover away that easy, you wont let anyone try to take away one of the important and huge part of your life
raihan big, so hes the big spoon, he loves cooing right at leons ears and kissing the back of his neck, shoulders and sometimes reaches forward to press a sloppy wet kiss to leons cheek
leon crying to raihan when he founds out raihan smokes when hes stressed out, and begging the other to stop and talk to him instead or cope with healthier way
raihan doesnt need an alarm clock to wake him up, leons just need to grin and say "good morning!" its so bright it WILL wake him up
raihan and leon lives together and since then the outfit leon has on his wardrobe is a collection of formal tailored outfits and his battle tower outift, some booty shorts and work out clothing, and obviously underwear and socks.the rest he just stole from raihan
especially t-shirts, hoodies, and jacket, raihan seeing him walking and opening his wardrobe after shower is such a common occurence that he doesnt even need to ask anymore
raihan looks like the type who carries lipbalm and hand cream in his hoodie pocket, he carries 2, 1 cocoa lipbalm for him and honey lipbalm for leon. whenever he met leon, he applies the lip balm on him, it becomes habit that leon even raise his chin up for raihan
leon can sleep alone fine, but when he woke up he felt groggy,but if he slept on top of raihan he'd woke up like he had a perfect 8 hours sleep even tho he slept for only 5 hours
raihan is a heavy sleeper but waking up with leon glued to his chest/back make his whole day better,especially when he woke up to leon peppering his face with kisses to wake him up
raihan being lowkey flustered and overwhelmed by leons beauty/cuteness/sexiness/everything while leon is being clingy and acting spoiled around him
leon cant be serious around raihan, when he saw the gym leader,he automatically let his guard down infront of him, changing from champion leon to leon from postwick, all giddy and happy
leon unzips his champion outfit and once raihan heard the zipping sound he zooms to leon to plant his face between leons chest
if leon wants attention from raihan he will do various things from holding his arm and press his head to raihans shoulders,sitting on his lap and loop his arm around raihans neck,hugging him from the front and put on a cute face
but if raihan wants attention he just, hug leon from behind,put his head on leons shoulder and doesnt let go until leon does SOMETHING
leon has been taking care of others for so long,so when raihan takes care of him ,its a new,yet quite familiar feeling.
its hard to accept since he felt bad about receiving the attention,but raihan kept doing it until leon tend to act spoiled around him
raihan always kiss leons forehead before he sleeps,when raihan is away, he has the urge to videocall raihan so he can coo him to sleep,but hes too embarrassed to do it
he thought abt that and raihan suddenly videocalling him,its noon on the region he visited, and hes like "heeeey, i just want to say good night to my beloved!! good night leon,sweet dreams,sorry bc i cant kiss your forehead but ill kiss u 10x more when im back"
leon was shocked and stared to his camera "lee? fuck,is the connection that bad-" and leon stuttered "n-no! i was surprised...thank you darling, have fun and stay safe okay?"
"of course! dont stay up thinking abt me for too long,i love you so much bubu,good night!
"..good afternoon raihoney,i love you too" leon stayed up for the next 20 minutes rolling around the bed screaming
raihan actually helps leon on taking care of his dragons, which made leons dragonmons actingspoiled around raihan,and sometimes leon thinks that his dragons loves raihan more than him
raihan plays with his dragonmon as if hes playing with a yamper,calling them "cute little babywubby" and playing with their hands,kissing their foreheads and lays with them on the floor,and of course leon joins in by laying on top or next to raihan
even leon have seen raihan carrying his dragapult like a baby with a baby axew hugging his legs, raihan is legit a dragon pokemon magnet
raihan has a habit of cooing or complimenting at leon even when hes doing the simplest thing ever and leon feels giddy like a 5 y.o everytime raihan does it
can u imagine how many pictures of leon raihan have on his phone,its probably more than 1000, he takes picture of leon as if hes a baby pokemon
leon comes to raihans place at 2 am without any warning,i mean raihan DID gave him a spare key so, raihans flat is HIS flat too,and there he goes,going to the bedroom and slip himself under the duvet,crawling to sleep closer to raihan
at first raihan is SO surprised that he jumped from the bed,but now he doesnt care anymore and just kiss leons head,mumbles "goo'nite bubh" and sleep again
leon does it so often that if hes gone from his apartment,people call raihan instead of him
raihan hugging leon from the back while leon is doing stuff in the kitchen while singing,and raihan is there like,peppering smooches and compliments while leon is STILL singing,and giggling bc raihan is smooching him
raihan is BAD at it but he sings along with leon in a joking manner and leon cant even sing anymore bc hes just wheezing while raihan is just "cmOn bAbeEEe SING AgAiiiNNnn"
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n-ugg · 3 years
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When Sam accepted this job, he thought it'll be fine. It'll finally be a challenge with his building and engineering. The pay will be so helpful too with wanting to make sure that one of his sons will have enough armor and weapons for a while without needing to go out and search for the supplies.
It would've been a good trade off.
So why is this back firing on him so badly?
-
When the prison was completed, Sam reported to Dream and asked for a higher pay. Dream immediately complies, gives him an extra three stacks of diamond block. Sam didn't question it.
Why would he? This will help him out so much and he wont need to worry about getting supplies for weeks. Months even!
Dream speaks up after the transaction, about how Sam knows who it is and it should be easy to get him in. Sam didn't pay much attention to what he said. He was too blinded by the pay to even ask who is going to be in.
The night was spent with Sam breaking apart the blocks to form into multiple full suits of armor and multiple swords. He even went the extra mile to head over to Punz to place in extra enchantments to make sure his son won't hurt himself as much.
He did all of this to make sure that his son won't get hurt. So why is he currently being ordered to put his son in the cell?
Sam was frozen in the prison. Seeing his son. Seeing Quackity calling out to him. Begging him for an answer on why did he make this prison for him. Why was he working against him this entire time.
Sam's voice was lost. He can't speak. He cant move. He's stuck between both of Dream and Quackity's yelling match, yet Sam can't hear either of them.
He felt his body move on his own the moment he noticed a shine from the corner of his eye coming from Dream.
Sam was standing in front of Quackity with his shield raised up with an axe at his side to push back Quackity. The sound hits him all at once as he hears the netherite axe hit the wooden surface.
"Sam!" He looks past the shield to make eye contact with Dream. His face was hidden, but you can tell behind the smile the rage continues to rise. "You agreed to a job and you need to complete it." His voice was back to his normal tone but you can tell theres a venom being held back.
Quackity raised his voice behind Sam. Please don't continue, Sam doesn't want to go forth with this. "I didn't do shit Dream! You're being a tyrant that you claim to never be! I don't deserve to be locked up by my own damn-" he cut himself off. Please stop, Sam still cares and views him as a son. "locked up by Sam." His tone noticeably gotten lower when he conpleted the sentence.
Sam felt the guilt in his stomach grow as the grip on the shield and axe gotten tighter. He just wanted to help. This was never supposed to happen.
"Quackity! You're a threat!" Dream's voice rose again. Why can't this yelling match just end? "You bombed Eret, who is neutral! And planned an army against Technoblade! What else are you planning to do?! You're a ticking time bomb! I need to put you away to protect the others!"
"Oh yeah?" You can hear a smile from Quackity's end. Why is he smiling in a time like this? "I only went against Eret because he fucking killed Karl! You're upset because I was able to see the king as a puppet! And Techno literally tried to kill us all by spawning withers! Why is he still running around?"
"Because he hasnt done anything to make himself known or done any harm yet! I can't just thr-"
"Shut up! Both of you." Sam finally spoke up. He just wanted it to end, so he'll need to listen. Sam did a final side glare at Dream before turning to back. "Quackity." Sam takes a pause to let out a deep breath he's been holding. "Please walk in the prison."
"I already told you Sam, Im not going in." Quackity stated with the smile off of his face as he refuses to look at Sam in the eyes and keep his contact with Dream, definitely noticing the grip on the axe tighten.
Sam can feel the murder behind Dream's eyes and what might happen if Quackity continues to protest. "Please, I don't want you to get hurt. I don't want to do this" Sam was pratically begging but he still kept his composer.
Quackity's smirk returned. "Yeah, like getting tossed in a inescapable cell by my own 'dad'-" those air quotes managed to do so much internal damage towards Sam. "-isn't hurtful enough. Heh, I thought I was able to trust you, man." The smirk faded away as Quackity started to focus on Sam. "Never would I ever thought that you'll backstab me like this by working with my biggest enemy. To fucking lock me away like that."
Sam took in another deep breath before letting it out. "I'm so sorry." Before Quackity was able to make a comment, Sam grabbed him and dragged him into the prison. It was easy due to the massive height difference. Quackity was trying to break away and make a run for it, but made absolute no progress.
Sam threw Quackity in and locked the doors. Quackity ran to the door and started to bang on it while screaming to be let out. Sam kept his own walls up to not break at the sight of seeing his son. The person he built the prison, to just get a generous pay for he can make the armor and weapons for, curse at him to let him out as he bangs on the walls while being on his knees.
Dream walked behind Sam and placed his hand on Sam's shoulder. "Good work, make sure he doesn't get out and you dont help. You know exactly what will happen." Sam simply nodded as he feels Dream's hand lift from his shoulder and hears him walk out of the prison.
Quackity was already away from the walls as he observed his new home. Sam wanted to look away, but he can't. He is completely unable to look away from the mess he's made. Sam tried to speak up, but felt his throat dry up the moment his mouth opened.
Quackity started to let out a laugh as his hand trailed along the wall. "You really made this inescapable, huh?" Sam didn't respond, just nodded as he took a couple of steps forward. Quackity let out another laugh as he walked towards to where Sam was at.
Sam was confused and cleared his throat before speaking. "Why are you laughing?" His voice was raspy. His throat still felt tight and dry.
"Because I trusted you! And then you backstabbed me by helping my biggest enemy!" Another cackle filled the cell. Sam cringed at the sound, not liking how his son has already broken down in the cell. "You need to help me with something. As a way-"
"Im not breaking you out." Sam's voice was stern as he tries to push down the thought of Quackity getting killed by Dream to the back of his head. "You'll get hurt. Badly."
Quackity shoke his head, "Not that." He stuffed his hands in his pocket and his posture straighted out.
"With what then?"
Quackity raised his hand over his beanie and pushed it back to reveal small horns, already having a small curve forming. "Remember the Frankenstein's monster arc?" Sam was taken a back seeing the horns, he also notices how Quackity basically had sharper nails then before and his eyes containing a really faint yellowish glow in the dark cell. "Want to finish it for me?"
So many thoughts rush into Sam's head. This could mean that all of the crimes that Quackity has been accused of can be forgiven since it isn't him. It was just Schlatt the entire time.
If he brings him back, he'll let go of Quackity.
He can have his son back.
He doesn't need to keep him locked up.
Sam quickly nods his head as a smile forms. "Anything for you."
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'requiem for a dream' discussion XD
update 1: finished requiem for a dream
update 2: depressed as fuck.
update 3: why did no one stop me from being a naive piece of shit and having even an ounce of hope for the characters XD.
update 4: these are not updates anymore. i am genuinely sitting and thinking about why i expected it to end happier.
for real tho, i really liked the book. i wouldnt say it's in among my favourites but i wont be forgetting about it for a while. the way all these characters, think of drugs as something that will HELP them reach their dreams, their goals is drenching me in so much sadness that i cannot process being in that state. at first i was rooting so hard for harry and marion and then halfway through im like- well yall are FUCKED up now so no italy, no coffee shops and no paintings. and then i questioned whether their dream to be on the come up was just something they could find an excuse for getting drugs. but then i was like hm harry and tyrone do everything by themselves so if that was the reason why would harry still be with marion if she played no actual role in helping them get drugs. and then i thought maybe its an excuse to THINK theyre going to get off them, their dreams were built on the hope that buying drugs would give them enough money to fulfill those very dreams. the denial to the addiction was INSANE tho, like inSANE.
i feel the worst for sara. absolutely destroyed by the progression of her character and i say not only because she ended up in such a terrible place, but also because as someone who's had a terrible relationship with food and body image, watching her cling on to her physical appearance and thinking that all her loneliness would be gone by going onthat show LOOKING a certain way, just made me say 'dont do it please dont please please'. her narration with the repetion of zophtic and thin and the refridgerators talkign was horrifying im just so so so sad she did NOT deserve any of this. its funny how tyrone was disgusted by the man in the jail. and then went on to be without alice and thinking the exact same way the man did about women and relationships. im sorry for ranting i just have a lot of thoughts about this book and its totally fine if u dont reply. also if im not wrong was a-dick-ted inspired from this? i think i remember u saying something along those lines but im not too sure if i got it right. brb gonna reread that series lol
side note: im gonna watch the movie with my crush im terrified and excited at the same time its AWESOME
um, the movie is very accurate to the book, unsure if you want to watch it with your crush LMAO the movie spares absolutely zero expense in how graphic it is and how incredibly messed up the entire situation is
and the ending is exactly like the book
EXACTLY
yeah
your crush might never look at you the same way again lol
'Requiem for A Dream' is about the fruitlessness of the American dream and how that concept can ultimately destroy you. It uses drug addiction to parallel this fixation. All of the characters are trying to "make it". The American dream is a concept that doesn't pertain only to America; it is the idea that anyone can attain their own version of success, regardless of their background, and that upward mobility is possible for everyone. America sells itself as the "land of opportunity", so it is as much a marketing scheme as it is a valid hope. Many countries outside of America still view America as the land of opportunity (and then you live here and, well... XD).
In theory, this is not a terrible mindset to have. Who doesn't want their own version of success? The problem lies in the word itself - success - and how people equate it to money, fame, fortune, and then take it to excess - a little is not enough, once you have a taste of success, you need more, more, more.
See the parallels to drug addiction? XD
Originally, the 'a-dick-ted' au was not inspired by this. It wasn't even supposed to be a series at all LOL It was just a one-shot ft Yoongi fucking you next to a sleeping JK (oop). But then I wrote 'dreaming in reality' and an idea began to form. 'Requiem for a Dream' has influenced a lot of my writing (can't tell you how many essays I've written on this book, it's so easy from both a film and character development perspective); it was only a matter of time before it touched something on here lol
In the 'a-dick-ted' au, I used the concept of love. The reader is fixated on the idea that love does not exist. Yoongi's character is fixated on the idea that he is too mentally broken to be loved. Jungkook's character is fixated on the idea of a "perfect love". All three use sex to cope in one way or another. When they have sex, they are "dreaming", in a delusion where their own self-imposed rules don't apply. When they stop, they are looking for their next fix. However, the reader and Yoongi would be too passive to push their emotions to the extreme, which is why the introduction of Jungkook escalates everything. There's a purity in Jungkook's indecency (lol), almost ironic that he is the most honest of all three. He is the foil that pushes them to their dreams. The line becomes blurred; maybe, after all, reader and Yoongi do feel love and it's not as unattainable as they thought? And maybe Jungkook's perfect love is as imperfect as they come in this strange harmonious triangle of confusion?
lol
'Requiem for a Dream' basically influenced the idea that one can be consumed by an idea to the point of unhealthiness and being blinded by your own dreams - or nightmares, depending on how you look at it. If you reread the 'a-dick-ted' au, you will start to see the connecting themes, use of language, changes in word choice by the characters over time, etc.
There's a lot of intention behind every line, every word, words spoken / unspoken, even the stories that just seem like PWP XD I'm well aware it flies over the heads of most, but occasionally someone chooses to read 'Requiem for a Dream' and pop into my inbox to talk about it. I love that book :D
hey
it got me through a lot of essays for many classes, from psychology to film to literature LOL
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darkalleywayexpress · 4 years
Text
Your destiny is written from the day you’re born. Part 3
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Part 1, Part 2, Part 4
Rated M
Warning: non-con sex, oral, violence, abuse.
This is based off The Devil All the Time. Specifically Lee Bodecker. Ideas be taken from the original story of course. 
Note: First time writing. Please give feedback. I don’t mind constructive criticism. Hope you enjoy. 
P.S. Im really bad at using this website. I find it hard lmao. So please give me time as I grown accustom to it. Thank you! (I have another fic in mind- though it will be darkSteve, but I'm not sure if I should do it or not. If y'all would like it please let me know.) :)))))))))
It’s my wedding day and I still don’t feet like ‘myself’. I feel like a withering leaf in fall on it’s last leg before it completely disappears. Not knowing where I truly stand I felt like I’m trapped, my heart palpating so much it hurts. All the days prior to this day I was unable to sleep, the consistent worrying in my head never faded away. As if my heart and brain knew something that I couldn’t fully comprehend yet. I’m left to fully rely on him not having any income of my own any longer since I was expected to quit work, due to the fact that the sheriffs wide would not be able to work or else people will start talking. Also taking in mind that people started talking, which got me to worry more. Rumors. As my mom put it. But don’t rumors have to stem off of some truth first?Though what I was able to comprehend from everything up until now was how much I hated myself. How big of an idiot I am. How I’m so weak to the point that I can even allow myself to be in every situation that I’ve ever been in. Staring straight at my reflection with the wedding gown he chose for me. Simple, just like me. I can care less about what I’m wearing and instead just truly want this horrendous day over. I can care less about what I’m wearing and instead just want the day over. My room door opens, my youngest brother Sam (who is still older than myself) walks in.
“Psst. Mrs. Bodecker.” With a grin smothered on his face. Seeing my reflection on the mirror he asks “you okay?”
“What am I doing?” Holding my tears back, though its hard my shell breaking.
“Well if you were to ask me I would say throwing yourself in fire. But it’s too late for that now, aint it?” He stops to grab both my hands in his own. “don’t worry y/n everything outta be alright. Before you even know it you’ll be much happier there than here with us. I should be getting down, and you should come soon too. You know how Pa and the others get when it comes to waiting.”
He leaves and I begin crying staring at my reflection. Have I truly thrown myself in flames? I wish I had a loving Pa who would save me from everything and everyone. Who would put me first before anyone else. Saying something along the lines of “Your happiness is what’s most important”. Maybe then I would’ve never been in this situation.
I make my way down. I see Lee standing looking up at me as I walk down. This ain’t the traditional way. But I guess that goes with everything. If I wasn’t the one getting married to him I would think he looks handsome today. They all get ready to head out.
I can’t do this. “I can’t do this.”  
My faces back to look at me, her eyes wide open. “Y/n?”
“Mom. I can’t do this. I can’t follow through this marriage.”
“Y/n.” She repeats herself more sternly this time.
Lee scoffs. Frowning but at the same time he seems like he is holding in his laughter. Laughter?
“Y/n, what do you mean I can’t get married?” He asks calmly. His head slightly moving side to side.
“I’m so sorry Lee. I just can’t.” I hold onto my dress running up the stairs, footsteps following behind me. My brothers voice speaking from a distance. He must be speaking to Lee. Before I can make it back to my room my Ma catches up to me yanking my arm, to stop me and get my attention.
“I had dreams for myself too. A dream where we both could’ve been happy. Where we both could’ve been. Not living with Pa and getting beat just because he felt like it - jjust because he was too drunk and he couldn’t think straight! Not a dream where I would marry I man I didn’t even know. Ma, please don’t make me do this. Ma, I beg of you.” I’m at her feet at this point my legs not being able to hold me straight up any longer. Swaying back and forth. Have I lost it?
She kneels down to look me in the face “It’s too late for that now y/n. Give me a chance, just this once? Lee’s a good man. He’ll take care of ya and your future kids. He got voted Sheriff honey now that ain’t so easy. You wont have to worry about nothing, he’ll be the man you deserve.  Holding my hands. Compassion. I don’t have much of a choice do I. If I don’t get married Dad’ll beat me to death. Collecting myself I soon head down.
Lee, sitting down on the beat up sofa. I make my way to him. Mom and Sam leaving us alone. He doesn’t look up at me, his head still in his hands. I don’t blame him. I can’t. To be in his shoes, I can’t even imagine. “Lee.”
“Are you alright?” He asks with what seems like genuine concern in his voice.
I nod. “Cold feet as ladies say it. I’m sorry.”
He nods. Putting his hand out forth for me to hold.
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The ceremony at the Church happens so fast and before I even notice we are having our celebration in the backyard that all the folks have it during summer, accept for us it’s in fall.
We sit at the table where the couples tend to sit and people coming forth to congratulate us. I drink for the first time to help ease myself, as I have heard it helps. Luckily Lee was answering all their warm wishes and questions if any. All I’m focusing on is keeping all the warmth I have with this little cropped fur coat. Paying attention to people chattering and drinking away. Harold? What is he doing here? I look to find mom in the crowd. Her eyes already looking at me sternly. What am I supposed to do? The weather gets colder and somehow, I start sweating.
“Congratulations on your marriage.” He says staring only at me, causing me to instinctively look at Lee whom is staring at me and him. “I really didn’t expect ya to get married y/n, especially to someone so old compared to ya self. But I guess it’s expected I mean ya Pa ain’t the nicest.” Harold says all the while grinning. I can feel Lee gripping onto my wrist. Tightly.
“Who the fuck do you think you are coming to my wedding and spewing all this shit to me. Boy.” Lee standing up so quickly from his seat the chair topples away. I grab onto Lee, holding him back so he doesn’t fight with Harold. Harold laughs which causes Lee to punch him square to his jaw. And before I even can do anything else a full fight breaks between the two and I just stand there watching as I cry inside.
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Harold was left bloody. And Lee and I head home. My new ‘home’. Lee slams the door after himself. Fisting my hands so tightly I think my nails are breaking the skin on my palms. Defensive. I feel the need to be defensive.
“Who are you Lee? Are you someone who just thinks out of anger and isn’t able to talk to resolve conflict? Or are you the person that the town loves so much.” The alcohol is truly hitting me hard.
“Forget about be. Who the fuck are you?” He says moderately loud “Start fucking talking or I bet ya it ain’t gonna be good for ya Hon.” I can’t reply it’s like my tongue is cut off. “Who the fuck was that kid?”
Swallowing. “I don’t have to answer you. I – I ain’t your property.” I turn heading to any room with a door at this point.
BANG. He slams his hand against the wall. “DO NOT! Do not walk away from me  when I ask you a question.”
I bawling at this point, not turning around to look him. “Mmaybe we aren’t mean’t to be L-lee. Why didn’t you just marry some other girl from this town.”
And before he says anything else I open the first door my eyes hold onto and shut it after myself. Sitting down on the bed I cry. Noticing soon enough that it must be his room. The door opens, Lee walking in to sit beside me.
I get up facing what would be the window, but is covered due to the blinds “Ccould you just give me sometime alone? Ple” his right hand grabs me from my jaw to make me look straight at him.
“I’ll do whatever the fuck I please.” He spits out. Grabbing my fur coat and rips is off my body, turning me around so he can unlace my dress. He pushes me face forward to the mattress, I begin crying to scared to move. I here rustling behind me. Him behind me soon, smelling me. “We could’ve had it so nice but you really wanted to be a bitch. I really did want to take it nice and slow but you really lost that chance and instead I think it’s time for a lesson.”
And it all happens in a blink of an eye. Him putting his manhood in me. I grunt due to the foreign feeling in me. Is it suppose to hurt? “Oh hon, is it your first time he says while staring in between my legs.” I nod, my hands go up covering my face. “Honey, why didn’t you tell me? Is that why you were acting up? Cause you were scared?” He laughs, and stops his rhythm to move my hands away from my face. Kissing me. His hand exploring around my body, kneeding my breats slowly and softly. My hands instinctively go to his own, he grabs onto mine. Putting it on either side of my head, slowly moving his body again. In between my legs begin to feel hotter, wetter. Pain and pleasure mixing together. Clenching an unknown feeling washing over me, he soon whines? Breathing gets harder and sharper and soon stills. I stay still as he gets up to turn the lights off. Pulling the covers over the both of us, his left arm thrown over my body. Eventually drifting to sleep through silent crys.
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oh-for-fic-sake · 4 years
Text
Trophy Chapter Eight
Masterlist
You become confused and start to question your feelings whilst Henry tries to be romantic but Stephan manages to fuck things up.
Warnings: Obsessive Behaviour, Implied Smut, Mentions of Murder, Mentions of Rape, Mentions of Torture, Dark themes, Yandere, Swearing, Daddy kink, Spanking threats, Angst?, Violence, Dark fluff(even I don't bloody know)
A/n: its quater past 11....I should be sleeping...my cat is littarily meowing at me to got to sleep but im not so here have chapter eight!!! so this chapter is mostly plot no smut unfortunately but the next one will be 1000٪. I have finally finally got the entire plot to this fic finished and written, I actually have some scenes for the next three chapters done to! But as I said mainly plot I intendedthis to be a little confusing from y/n perspective I want you to get a sense of what y/n is going through juggling her feelings and all that apart from that I really hope you enjoy this one xx
Taglist: @havenoffandoms​ @aphrodites-punch​ @charlieferret​ @thatgirly81​ @two-unbeatable-beaters​ @fitnees-motivation-2020​ @viking-raider​ @iloveyouyen​ @black-ninja-blade​
Gif not mine but the divider is xxx
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Stephan was at a loss, sitting in the cheap b and b room he rented, papers strewn across the floral bed spread he had been going through his contacts agents. Friends. Investigative journalists. Anyone and everyone he could think of hoping someone somewhere would give him a break, a lead something anything! A way for him to distract Henry enough so he could slip you away from him. Fuck sake at this point he'd pull him in for a fucking parking violation just to get this barstard alone in a room for five minutes!! But no one was willing to help they were all in until the name Cavill was mentioned. He couldnt really blame them Cavill did two things to people who investigated him ruined them or off'd them.
Just last week another agent who'd been working undercover as one of the handlers of his prostitutes was found by the bay death by necklacing. A grusome death something he hadn't seen used in America before, usually it was a shooting or stabbing, necklacing was a brutal ,loud and mostly used in places like Africa and Brazil. Execution and torture all in one. It may be one of the cruelest ways to kill someone but it was in all honesty simple to do, hell anyone could do it which is why they couldn't pin it on Henry specifically, hands bound to your chest; in this case with wire and a tire full of petrol placed over you holding them still trapping them, doused in more petrol and set alight. Its a slow agonizing death that takes around twenty minutes, her screams would have been loud but no one in the area had heard or see a thing he bet they had and were just to frightened. He couldn't blame them he saw the girl before she'd been taken off to autopsy, agents; professional, trained to deal with anything agents,onscene were being physically sick from the sight and smell unused to this type of violence. The poor agent had suffered even before that. Autopsy showed she had been raped beforehand she was described as cut and torn up in the report, but they must have used condoms of some description as there wasn't any dna evidence. Or if there was it had been burned away like her charred skin, her body had been in such a bad way that there was nothing to go on. Without evidence they can't charge or formally question a suspect.
Safe to say everyone was shaken up, some left completley requested reassignment and all the ones who came before him were either dead of terrified of the man. Not only that word of Stephans fuck up had got out and he was now a laughing stock. Stephan was supposed to be a honey trap, go undercover seduce a woman of intrest to do one of two things one, prob for information, if she had some great! Stay and use it and If she didnt dump her move on to the next job simple Or two, find a woman to maintain a close connection to the target in this case that was you. It was believed that there was a connection between you and Cavill.
The mobster out of the blue was trying to buy a block of flats in a shitty area. Now Cavill owned property,  lots of property but never flats and never on that type of estate. He owned fancy restaurants and night clubs stupidly high class bars that had dress codes and the residential properties were allways four beroom three bathroom houses worth millions with fucking suanas and shit. Bottom line it was out of character and the man was trying to rush through the sale. The higher ups had hoped with the way he was acting; so out of character and flustered, that he would fuck up. He a mobster kingpin with litteraly billions to his name was trying to buy a building that was falling apart, in a run down poor area, wasn't for sale and was willing to skip negotiations and overpay... 
The only possible connection to it all was you. They knew Fletcher had dealings with Henry and knew Henry used the cafe for his smaller business meetings. That was the most infuriating thing they knew so much but they just couldn't prove it!. So Stephan was called in to see if you was privvy to Henry and his empire and if you was willing to be an informant. Simple. Until it wasn't and feelings got involved. He wasn't supposed to fall for you but he had and that had cost him the assignment. He was supposed to drop it but he wont, so he had to sniff around himself he knew Henry kidnapped you, he knew Fletcher set it up and he knew he was going to save you. With that in mind he decided to do something he never even dreamed. Stephan was going to go rouge.
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Henry was content albeit impatient,  he waited at the bottom of the stairs waited for you his wonderful little princess. He had arranged a night out in one of his top restaurants, he figured now that you were here willingly he could begin to spoil you, lavish you with the luxury you deserved and you had been good these past days you deserved a treat. Tonight was about showing you just what it means to be his, the respect, the glitz and glamour. He was hoping that he could begin to sway you more, he knew you were questioning youself and him, his intentions and as you were questioning he saw a change you were more compliant. He paced slowly his head of security Luke was there beside him stiff as a board, Luke thought it was a mistake flaunting you around so early. But Luke could go fuck himself, Luke was not in charge and Luke should keep his opinions to himself.
Henry was begining to get tired of the mans bitching it was clear that his head of security had something against his sweet pet. It may have been the fact that Henry; seeing the bruises on your wrists after your escape that was definitely not made from handcuffs, had investigated and watched the security footage seeing the way the gruff man had manhandled you dragged you through the house after taunting you, thrown you into your day room on the day you'd escaped. Yes Henry ha found out and promised the man a grizzley end if it ever happened again. The only man to leave marks on your soft skin was him. Luke was bitter over the fact you'd escaped further then the garden on his watch, well thats what Henry put it down to.
"If you sigh again I will stop you breathing altogether!" He finally snapped over his shoulder to the man. 
"Sorry sir I just think-" Henry spun on his heel pointing at him.
"I dont pay you to think! I pay you to do as your fucking told! To protect our investments and you didnt! Incase you haven't noticed your on thin ice as it is, theres a line of others who would take your place in a heartbeat Luke so I suggest you start pulling your shit together unless you want an early retirement." The words were hissed a snarl he couldn't help the thrill that came from Luke's shocked fearfull look. Luke knew poeple didnt retire from his position, not the in the masive pay out and a sipping pinacolada on a sandy beach sense. The only retirement he would see is two foot wide and six foot deep if he was lucky. Henry watched steely eyes burning into the man before him, the guard finally looked away gulping nodding slowly.
"Y-yes sir..I will go make sure the car is ready" Henry smirked crossing his arms 
"You do that! Be the most usefull thing you've done all day." Luke cringed at that but could say nothing he simply left the house out towards the drive shuting the door with a quiet click. Henry shook his head as he watched Luke descend the few step of the porch. He was going to have to do something about him soon.
He pulled his thoughts away from the dark path they had traveled and glanced at the stairs again then began his pacing from side to side once again looking at his the rolex upon his wrist. You were taking your time. Sighing he turned again looking expectantly at the stairs. Its not like you had to decide what to wear he had laid it out! He had done the hard bit all you had to do was hair and make up. He grunted making another lap of his choosen pace route. You better not be up there pouting, if you were he was going to be very annoyed. Five more minutes. He decided five minutes then he would go check and if you was being a little madam and pouting he would blister you ass with the belt at his waist and drag you out anyway dressed or not. He moved finally standing at the stairs hand gripping the banister in a white knuckle grip hissing through his teeth. 
Then he heard it heels tapping on the marble floor slow and unsteady, you were coming. He held his breath waiting for you to turn the corner at the top of the landing. When you did he had to swallow dryly, you were a vision, stunning you were made to be on his arm there was no doubt about it. You made your way down the stairs trying not to topple over in the high heels, which you suspected he had put you in so you couldnt run. Well you could try but you have to unbuckle them first which would be a dead give away. 
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You'll admit the dress was beautiful and comfortable considering how figure hugging it was. A deep royal blue velvet ,thin spaghetti straps and a low open back stopping just at the swell of your bottom, the front had a soft swooping neckline showing a hint of the very top of your breasts. It was a fine choice, henry definitely had an eye for these things. Every outfit he put you in since being here was always well thought out and this was no exception. You had to be careful tonight, he had provided a dress, stockings garterbelt even jewellery and some new lipsticks! but no panties. It made you nervous, it was one thing to always be around the house in skirts with no undies but to go out? You had to be wary, the small mercy was that it was a knee length dress so hopefully no accidents. However that being said with how form fitting it was and the way it pushed up your boobs there was more chance of a nip slip then a lip slip.
There was a complete set of expensive looking Jewellery that each had been packed in blank leather jewellery boxes and was presented on purple velvet. The necklace was three long strings of diamonds one a choker then longer to your collar bone then the final resting just below your dress' neckline the middle string holding one single large diamond in the center, the weighty rock made you dread to think of the cost and matching small dangling earrings and a bracelet...And anklet he had insisted you to be head to toe in diamonds. 
For your hair you had styled it up and away from your face in a sleek sophisticated look,your make up was light, you didnt want to go all out and make him think you were trying to impress him, although in some respects you did want to impress him but for now you would ignor that. You had settled for a light face of make up and one of your new lipsticks a dark nude shade between a peach and beige the last thing you wanted was for him to get angry about not putting in effort which was a real possibility with how the slightest things could trigger a mood swing.
You'd found the past week since you had....Assisted him in the livingroom something had changed, a subtle change at first. You found youself stealing quick glances and smiles at him, he had caught you staring a few times and winked making you flush and stutter. He still had his moments but it seemed your 'admission' of not wanting to leave and wanting to try to stay and fall in love with him had calmed him down significantly. Sure you'd been given a few punishments when he got insecure here and there. You had been finding yourself participating in all of the intimate moments he was forcing onto you, when you did things with him you could barely speak let alone think the throws of passion was an escape. To your own confusion and shame you now admitted to yourself you enjoyed him lathering you with attention it was becoming to easy to melt into his embrace, to tempting to kiss the man back and cuddle up to him as he soothed the burning prints he left across your skin. You were frightened at just how much you began to crave him and need him, you still tried resisting but it was few and far between. In reality you were giving in to him and you didnt exactly hate the change. despite everything it sill felt a little wrong to let him get his way but that bad feeling was becoming easier to ignore.
But don't get things wrong, you had no desire to stay here permanently you had just resigned yourself to it for the time being...You think things i  your...Relationship were confusing at the moment you liked the man but hated how this had all come about. You tried reasoning that your feelings were changing in some sort of survival technique or something. That subconsciously you had to pacify him, make him believe you was slowly falling for him so he wouldn't hurt you or the ones you loved. But at this point you wasn't entirely sure. I mean if that were true and you did this all for Stephans life shouldnt you feel somthing for the agent. But in reality all you felt was abandoned and betrayed by him, but it didn't hurt not like the loos of a friend or lover as you thought it would have. Maybe you was just weird? or maybe you didn't really love him? What ever it was you was thankfull for it as you could concentrate more on yourself and what you had to do to get out of this alive, sane and single. You were not falling in love with this mad man no matter what he did and said you shouldnt fall for it you shouldnt fall for him. But you were slowly realising that just because  you shouldn't didn't mean you wouldn't.
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Henry's face lit up as you slowly made your way down the steps on wobbly feet unused to the heels that brought the top of your head up to his eye line. Seeing you struggling he smirked meeting you half way up the stairs linking his arm with yours. You flinched almost pulling back knowing you should but his grip was firm and you needed help. His voice was low and playful when he spoke.
"It seems you will need my help with walking tonight before you've even touched a drop of wine my love. Thats no matter, more of a reason for you to cling to me and I do enjoy you wrapped around me pet." You gave a quick glance, so you was in these ridiculous heels for a reason. You forced a smile letting go of the banister as he walked you down the stairs over to the door.
"You look stunning! I have the best table in the place reserved just for us but first" he moved spinning around you and just like a magic trick his hand appeared from behind him with a small ring box, he moved pulling up your left hand kissing the back of it. You shivered as he maintained eye contact feeling him smirk. You cursed yourself wanting to contorl your reactions but couldnt seem to. He spoke a cheeky grin his voice was playfull. 
"Here something to complete the outfit I wont have my little girls hands bare~" You gulped as he pulled back the lid of the small box revealing an obnoxiously huge rock sat embedded in what looked like a silver but was most likely white gold band. You tugged at your hand and winced when he dug his thumb in your palm tugging your hand out hashly.
"Daddy! That's to much-I'm not one for rings please everything else is enough. " He blinked his face dropping.
"You don't like it? Whats wrong with it?" You eyed him carefully and shrugged.
"No-nothing I just..." he interrupted you growling at you scowling
"You don't want it? I had it made for you and now you don't even fucking want it? I just wanted to treat you baby? You've been so good and now your going to start acting up? When I'm trying to reward you for being so good. Just trying to have a quiet night out with you, I dont have to take you out, I could fucking keep you here day in day out" You could hear it, that of hectic insanity. Frantic undertones. You quickly shook your head.
"No no I want it! I do want it I'm just worried...It looks...Ive never had anything that looks that expensive" you moved forward to him placing a hand on his chest rubbing slightly, youd learned fast that initiating intimate gestures help calm him a little.
"I-i'm frightened that I'd upset you if I loose it especially if we dance..We are going to have our first slowdance tonight aren't we? I was hopeing we could..Tho people will laugh I've never danced like that before." It did the trick he calmed blinking slowly then beamed at you.
"Oh little one thats sweet of you to worry about daddys feelings like that..But baby I wont be upset if you lost it Id just get you another one pet... Now come here and keep still like a good girl" you sighed in relief as he calmed down you cringed and twisted your hand as he tried to place it on your ring finger, his eyes flicked up to you in warning.
"Its...thats bad luck I'd rather not.." he grunted and took your right hand placing it on your ring finger. You shuddered as you realised it fit perfectly. He moved back placing one parting kiss.
"That is your first warning tonight, daddy doesn't want any games...You ruin tonight and I will be very displeased and you will not like the outcome" you nodded takig a breath.
"Y-yes daddy I understand...I'll be good" he gave a quick look.
"You better now lets go" you released a breath tho calmer he wasn't happy youd argued, disagreed you wasnt supposed to do that.
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Henry playing the part of a gentleman opened the door to the car for you. Once inside he set off out of the gate, you shivered a little trying not to glance at him. He moved his hand to your leg patting it softly rubbing the soft nylon of the stockings he groaned subtly to himself as he continued down the road, you cringed a little moving to pull the hem of the dress down not wanting him to take advantage of the rising skirt and your bare pussy merely inches above. He squeezed lightly feeling you tug the fabric down under his palm cutting off the contact. He rolled his eyes biting his lip to stop the comments on the tip of his tongue. No he wont ruin this night before its begun, anything that happens he can rectify later when you were restrained and withering one your final treat. He licked his lips as he thought about the nights festivities and hopefully what the outcome will be. He was pulled from his devious thoughts when you wriggled uncomfortably still trying to get used to wearing half a set of underwear... And lets face it stockings and garter belts aren't exactly the norm any way. It was after ten minutes of sighing, huffing and squirming that he spoke pulling you out of your thoughts.
"Whats the matter little one?" you snapped you head to him and smiled going to brush him off he removed his hand from your leg wagging a finger.
"Ah ah come on no lying that will be your second warning and we aren't even there yet~" you closed your mouth giving him a heavy pout he rose an eyebrow letting his hand land back in your lap.
"Its...Well I've never...I'm getting used to the stockings...Never worn them before and its strange under the dress...especially not having any panties on....I'm covered but not " he through his head back and laughed as he pulled up to a red light.
"Oh love! you should have said baby...I thought you were having a paddy! I was getting ready to take you back home and tann your naughty backside with my belt." you snapped your head in his direction gulping knowing full well he would have.
"Oh little one don't be so tense..I promise tonight I'm going to spoil you this is a treat baby girl a night of fine food,  fine wine and even finer company" you smiled forgetting your underwear situation for a moment twiddling your new bracelet wanting to take your mind off things. You were going to try and enjoy the night try and forget everything just for one night. You smiled up at him shyly.
"I'm looking forward to it..But I get the feeling your taking me somwhere fancy and I've neve done fancy... think the fanciest place I've been is your house"he chuckled looking forward to the road cheking the lights then moved to face you.
"Our...Its our house pet you live there to now remember.. and don't worry I own the place so no one will say anything if you make a little slip up...Okay little one and if anyone does upset you ,you tell me straight away..I wont have my babygirls night ruined by anyone" you didn't want his words to effect you but they did, the idea of him caring enough to make sure you enjoy the night was sweet.
"Y-you mean it?" he nodded giving the lights another quick glance then focused back on you
"Of course! tonight is all about spoiling my number one! you can have anything you want and that includes a doggy bag of deserts to bring home" you smiled at him hopefully giggling.
"Deserts sound good! I'm excited now do they have cheesecake?" he pursed his lips thinking for a second wanting to prolong your cheerful mood.
"Yes, three kinds and I assume you'll be having a slice of each?" you nodded at him with a cheeky grin, Henry smirked at you leaning in playfully tucking his hand by your knee tickling the back making you giggle and squirm pushing at him. 
"Well my love three slices..Now that is a big ask and deserves a pre-payment I think...Three kisses should suffice" you grinned shaking your head at him and squealed as he leaned over playfully growling stealing three sweet kisses then leaned back in his seat , he was gobsmacked when youd followed him placing a peck against his cheek. You froze realizing what you did and jumped back holding your lips in surprize. What the fuck was that? He smirked moving the car into drive as the light changed. You righted yourself in the seat leaning back choosing to forget that little slip up. But still felt optimistic maybe tonight would be a fun night out even if it was with Henry.
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YES! it had paid off, a few days he had spent watching waiting but finally there was movement. he had been waiting here at the main road leading to the mobsters house. Parked next to a motel mainly used by truckers who stayed overnight, Stephan quickly climbed to the front seat of the car watching as the Aston martin drove past him, not just any Aston martin Henry's Aston martin, the only custom db11 in the city. He quickly pulled his binoculars out to see...Fuck yes!...He couldn't believe his luck! you were in the passenger seat and dolled up... He took a breath you looked incredible and to his utter despair and confusion you looked happy?.
Henry stopped at the intersection Stephan fumed as Henry laughed at something you said then moved his hand out of sight making you roll your eyes and press him away playfully laughing he didn't pull back instead he quickly leaned over kissing you, and the thing that cut Stephan most was that you let him, you seemed to enjoy his attention. Stephan's heart clenched seeing you like that, you were supposed to hate him...You were a captive. You couldn't possibly like the man could you?. He shook his head of course you didn't a mad man like henry? you were playing a part, hopefully a part that you could retire from tonight. He flicked on the ignition throwing down his binoculars if he could follow you both...If he could get in he had a chance, could give you a chance to escape! he could save you.
He took a second watching again as you moved you were smiling giving him a quick peck, he couldn't bare to watch anymore he closed his eyes gripping the steering wheel tight swearing. Could he be to late? He loathed to think of just what he had put in your head what he could have convinced you to do. The light turned green and car pulled away, he waited a few seconds then pulled out making sure not to be to close or be caught by the lights. It only took the disgraced agent around fifteen minuets to realize where you were being taken. It would seem Henry was taking you on a date? trying to romance you, wine and dine you but then what? there had to be a reason, and ulterior motive. Stephan held back watching as the Aston martin pulled around the front of the hotel, Henry exited the car and walked around holding your door for you. He felt a rush of anger as Henry helped you out of the car then tossed the keys across the car to the valet. Stephan stared gulping, you really did look amazing even if you were struggling to stand in shoes he knew you wouldn't have been caught dead in if you had a say. He must have forced you in to them, so he could have you wrapped around him, leaning and clutching at him as you wobbled about unsteady. His blood boiled as Henry moved offering you his arm when you took it he felt..betrayed almost asking himself if you were worth it now, it looked like Henry had got to you. He seethed watching you climb the few stairs to the hotel entrance linking arms with your captor ,you looked up at the mad man smiling nodding as he spoke completely at ease.
Something was very wrong with this image, a kidnapped woman going out on the town with her kidnapper? on what looked like a romantic date?. You hadn't seemed like one of those shallow golddiggers who'd do anything for a bit of bling or money, but Stephan couldn't help but wonder to himself at that point. You looked happy if not a little nervous? shy? you looked like a love struck teenager. But Stephan couldn't help himself he couldn't doubt you, you needed him to get you out, to save you. You needed him to try. He moved pulling the car around the back, thankfully as this was a hotel people were coming and going all the time so it'd be easy enough to get in, he was coming for you. Tonight he will save you and it will look like nothing more then a lovers spat! a perfectly realistic situation that would have no repercusions. Once he had you, you could testify against the mobster and this would all be over. Henry would finally be behind bars where he belongs.
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You took a breath seeing the long line of people waiting to get in the restaurant each in expensive looking glad rags,you tucked your head down akwardly as Henry strode past the long line of people each making a fuss at the two of you. Some did not knowing just who the man on your arm was. Henry cut to the front interrupting the guest at the front.
"Is everthing ready?" His voice was bored as a woman quickly scampered over ready to let the owner in much to the anger of the other guest. The two at the front tried capturing his attention to give him a piece of their mind but Henry ignored them.
It wasn't long before you were in the high end restaurant in one of the towns two five star hotels that he owned. It was nice the restaurant was about fifteen stories up a dark blue almost black marble looking floor,  tables all coverd with pure white table clothes that felt like some stupid 800 thread count material ,high back black leather chairs ,single white roses and candles on each table dotted around. The focal point was a huge wall with intergrated tropical fishtank that seperated the regular tables and vip area which was raised slightly. The set up was split in two, one half all centred around useing the veiw courtesy of the floor to ceiling windows looking over the town the other half had the fish tank to look at..It was clever really the fishtank gave you a faux sense of privacy a perfect divider that let light flow to the other half of the seating area.
Henry walked you straight past the fish tank to a high private table in the corner of the vip area a huge bouquet of roses sat on the table. 
"For you babygirl" you couldn't help but smile brightly as he slid them to you. You leaned in smelling the roses slowly running your finger across the curve of the soft petals your heart warmed and for a moment you truley felt... Special? Cherished?.
You cast a sweeping gaze across the seating area admiring it whilst empty knowing it wont be for long, it was the most expensive place you'd ever been to eat. As you looked around you noticed that the other geusts were slowly trickling in being seated by smartly dressed servers. You looked slower taking in the decor more carfully. Henry wasnt lying when he said the table was the best in the place  it had a uninterrupted veiw of the city and the restaurant.
"You like it?" You nodded looking around the decor was black and gold giving a art decor gatsby vibe. He moved pulling out your chair letting sit then sat himself across from you smileing as you pulled the roses across the table placing then on the corner out of the way blushing. 
"Yes I was right it is a fancy place...A little daunting but exciting...And I can't wait for my cheesecake its my favourit and I haven't had it in sooo long!"
"Any thing for you my little one...But only good little girls who eat all their dinner get a desert you know that...ah ah no pouting!"
"But tonight's supposed to be a treat daddy" he gave you a stern look across the table at your pouting 
"Yes and if your a good girl and ask nicely we would eat out like this everyday, but you were naughty to begin with and daddy has to be strict and have lots of rules...And one of those rules is no desert before dinner now enough pouting don't be ungrateful" you blushed stupidly enough you agreed with him in a way you'd come to enjoy some of his rules, they made you feel...accomplished in a way youd never experienced before, you had something to work to and when you did as he asked he praised you which always made a warmth in your chest blossom. You tucked your nose in a rose you'd plucked from your bouquet grinning softly.
"Im sorry Daddy...Thank you for the roses they are very beautiful" he smiled holding his arms out in a exasperated gesture tilting his head for emphasis
"Well at least you will accept flowers with out a fuss little one...Thats one thing I can now be sure of" You looked down still feeling scolded even if his tone was light you cursed the feeling in your chest. Like rocks had been stuffed in your ribcage making your chest heavy, he was obviously still bitter about the ring you could tellfrom how pissy he was being. You fidgeted worrying just what that would mean for you during the night.
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Almost immediately after you sat down you were served a sweet smelling dark wine by a fairly handsome man who popped the cork with ease handing it to Henry whilst giving you a nervous smile you smiled back to him unaware of Henry's face turning sour he nodded and gave the young man a gruff grunt to proceed, the wine was acceptable apparently you watched as the server moved pouring you out a half glass with shaking hands well aware of Henry who was glaring daggers at him ,you smiled to thanking him. Henry must have taken it wrong as he snarled a 'fuck off' at the man who quickly placed the bottle on the table and practically ran out of sight.
"Hen- da I...what was?...I was just being polite please can we just enjoy ourselves...Please." he sat back regarding you one elbow on the arm of his chair twiddling his fingers, his gaze was unerving. He paid no mind to a waitress placing a bottle of bourbon and a glass finally he clicked his tongue smirking enjoying makeing you squirm. He smiled quickly leaning over pouring his own drink casually.
"I'd be carefull pet, you've got one warning left tonight it'd be a shame to have to reprimand you here and trust me daddy has no qualms of upending you on this table and giving you a sound thrashing" you jolted opening your mouth unable to find any words you settled on nodding quietly sipping at you drink meekly he rolled his fingers in a smooth motion until it was a loose fist.
"Answer me pet you know I hate you ignoring me unless you want to be made an example of here? want everyone to see your cute little bottom turned pink over daddy's lap as you kick and squirm like a naughty little girl" you squinted your eyes cheeks tniging pink at his words, deciding it was best not to test him you quickly slapped the drink down a few drops jumped from the glass staining the crisp white table cloth. You froze watching the dark liquid seep across the fibers.
"I-I'm sor-ry please I didn't mean-" you panicked and began begging looked up and could have cried for some reason he was keeping you on edge tonight more so than usual. He was smiling playfully into the rim of his glass, he had been toying with you...had he? you had hoped you knew his mind games but he was in an unpredictable mood tonight.
He moved slowly plucking the menu curling a finger calling a waitress over and ordered for the both of you. You sat twiddling your fingers unsure of what to do, he had seemed happy in the car but in here...It was like he wanted to keep you on a short leash, make you understand although you were out having a treat you were not free to do as you pleased. You settled on people watching moving to get a view of the other couples, they smiled and curled around one another so happy in love. Free.
You looked down blinking away tears, was this worse? Being out and seeing what you'd never have? In the house you could ignore it but here watching them be so genuine. No matter how much you fell at this mans feet you'd never have that freedom to feel, to be so careless in your love. You'd always be controlled be pressed into what ever made him happy...
Your purpose was to make this beautiful monster happy. But you'd agreed, was it wrong to let yourself go under? To fully succumb to his dominance and try to enjoy him. To find comfort in him and accept him as the beautiful yet cruel man he was?you would have to eventually so why wait? It'd save you heat ache in the end. And as the days blurred into weeks and months you knew that it would be easy. He was vindictive and spite full. He was ruthless and cunning yet to you he was almost kind, it would be easier if you swallowed your pride and let yourself fall for him. Life would be easier and you was slowly accepting that it was the obvious choice, you moved casting a glance at the couples around you. Could that be you? Could you have that happiness in the end with him? the frightening thig was. Yes. you could already feel that your feelings were changing slowly but surely, were you in love with him? no did you care for him? Yes.
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You hadn't realised he moved until he had made his way arohnd the table holding ut a hand palm up below your down turned face. You jumped snapping your head up confused he furrowed his brows slightly pressing a hand to your cheek wiping away a few stray tears.
"Dont cry pet...Not here no one should see your tears but me, no one should put them there but me. Here come on take my hand" you quickly moved wiping them away once your face was free of tears he grasped your hand. Pulling you up slowly, you followed docile as he pulled you towards a large dancefloor at the back of you space just behinde the bar. You saw there were a few couples were already slow dancing you tensed.
He spun round to face you as the song changed to one you recognized, No peace by Sam Smith played loud yet soft through the speakers it was one of our favourite's but this time the words had a much deeper meaning. He held your back his palm hot against the bare skin he stepped forward pulling your hand up near his shoulder you held him softly. Swaying slowly you'r eyes darted around eyes were on you from those who knew Henry, guests and staff alike.
"Look at me...Forget them little one they are just curious its rare for them to see such elegance up close, and I must say you look divine...More of a little lady then a little girl" you flushed at the compliment trying to follow his skilled movements as he placed his feet expertly without a thought to it as he spun you around in smooth steps across the floor, you swore looking at your feet as you stepped wrong capturing his toes. He chuckled and lifted you effortlessly off his foot  an inch or so and placed you back to the floor
"Sorry..I don't mean to..I've never danced like this before...Not very good on a normal dance floor and I'm ten times worse at this, these heels aren't helping...I must look like fucking bambi on ice" he chuckled smoothing his thumb across the skin of your back. Enjoying the backless dress pressing his hands into you feeling your shivers the ripples across your back as he smothered you in his huge frame, letting you feel small in his embrace. He quickly and subtly lifted you up once again as you nearly stood on him again.
"Bambi is a very fitting name I may steal that one" you gave a shy smile smirked spinning you aubruptly then pulled you back skillfully tugging you a little closer. He tilted his head down talking in a hushed baritone voice. 
"Your doing fine...Just let daddy lead, daddy will look after you I promise" you gulped and nodded he spun you again this time making sure your bodys touched, slipping his feet between yours using them to move yours guiding your steps.
He settled you to him as he moved prompting you to lay your head on his shoulder he spun you both slowly bringing you near the center of the floor to make sue no one bumped into you. You sighed humming along quietly whispering the lyrics suddenly there was a lump in your throat you swallowed hard pressing your head into his neck. It looked intimate. It was intimate. You listened as he picked up where you left off humming he lyrice into your ear low and relaxing. You whined moving your hands holding him around the neck breathing a shaky breath into his neck. He moved pressing a sweet kiss to your head song changed and you was thankful, pulling your head up to see his eyes staring at you there was a fondness he gave a lopsided grin.
"Are you okay my love? Your very tearful tonight." You blinked shaking your head at him.
"I'm..C-Can I speak truthfully....without?.." he tensed as you trailed off, you wanted to speak freely without consequences. He mulled over the idea unsure if he should shoot you down, he decided against it if he halted you now you may never be honest with him again. He nodded to you giving you his undivided attention as he slowdance with you in the crowd. You took a deep breath unsure if it was the right time to have this conversation. He had given you permision but you will still be careful with your words.
"I'm confused... You confuse me Henry...Being here like this I..."You looked to the other couples wistfully then back to him.
"I want that...I want that love that freedom and...And I...We feel like a couple ,like we could be a normal couple like them ,but you frighten me, the things you say and do and I...I'm unsure of whats right and wrong now...Normal couples don't do what we do they dont threaten spanking's on dates!" he hummed in response mulling over your words for a few breaths, could everythinghave been his fault? You didnt understand the type of relationship he had with you therefor you dont know what he wants from you or what to expect, is that confusion why you were fighting so hard?
"I'd hoped you were finally accepting things now. I'm glad you were honest with me about being confused love and I'm proud of you. We feel like a couple because we are.... But normal? No we are not we are a bdsm couple, we live a bdsm lifestyle which suits both of us. Your mine and I am yours we are soulmates. You are just finally catching up to that and soon we will feel like this all the time, this happiness this relaxed and playful. I know its all still quite new now but soon you will be used to me being your lover, your daddy, your dominant ,your one and only and in time I will be your husband and father to your children. We will be like this for the rest of our lives. I apologize that I'm only just explaining this now and I can see why you were so reluctant and scared going form a normal vanilla and quite innocent relationship to being in this...very strict and quite demanding, sexually fueled one can be daunting. I was just so caught up wishing you would ajust quicker but matters of the heart can't be rushed and now I see that is what I was trying to do. I am content for now. Soon this will be normal, the jewellery the luxury anything you desire will be yours when you finally admit to loveing me back, when you succumb to your true feelings." He moved looking to the others around you then back to you smiling.
"You will be just as happy as them..If not more you will be the most treasured and spoilt woman in the city, the world even I promise and when that day comes you will make me the happiest man on the planet" he moved solidifying his statment with a kiss, a promise he words sounded like vows in itself. You sighed and pulled back he took a deep breath as you did.
"I'm trying I...Its a lot to take in and I'm glad I spoke to you...I think I understand a little more now...Your You dont mean to frighten me you just...Get excited? okay I can live with that...I've never been in love before its frightening" he smiled twisting you around pulling your back to his front holding you close placing a kiss to your shoulder.
"I know you are trying love, what do you think this is tonight? This is your reward for your week of good behaviour. I am patient I will wait for you neither of us are going anywhere. And in the end everything will be worth it you'll see" 
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You stood stock still freezing as you looked out into the now full restaurant.You spoke as you cast your eyes to the male in the crowd. He was glaring at you making your chest go cold.No. What did he see? What will he think? You dropped you hands from henry's arms your breath was a whisper.
"Stephan?" Henry brought his head up abruptly going rigid he hands wrapping around your waist tighter almost painfull as if you was going to run to the other male. He looked around growling low and dangerous searching for him finally he honed in on him. Was hair dye all someone needed to bypass his men? He seethed as you trembled in his arms he held his breath. Moving closer to your ear.
"You want him? you want to run to him? Do you? You can I will let you but he will be dead before you touch him!" His words were a hot hiss in  your ear.
"No...I-I want him gone" the words were out befor you could catch them he hissed in your ear.
"Y-You what?" he turned you abruptly trying to sniff out a lie but you just held his gaze firm he swallowed his mouth going dry he covered his shock well then glared
"We will see...Come lets go see our dear Stephan shall we?" You tried struggled to keep up but he continued storming across the floor toward him. Henry half dragged half marched you through the dancing couples as you staggered in the stupid fucking shoes!. He turned to you slowly as you gained on Stephan who either bravely or stupidly stood his ground. Your heart beat faster tho you was unsure why you were worried but for who you couldn't say.
"Just remember our arrangement and he will leave here alive" you took a deep breath humming in response before hissing out an answer.
"I'm not leaving Henry" After what felt like an eternity to stood face to face with him, the one you could have seen yourself with on the arm of the man you were forced to be with.
"Y/n..." you looked to him blinking slowly 
"Leave" you had to do it, to send him away Henry would hurt him. You wasn't sure if you were just saying that or not, maybe you wanted to stay with Henry. But that was a thought for another day.You swallowed standing tall looking straight at him, you will not have this mans blood on your hands and you will not be used by him again you had enough sorting out your own shit and trying to figure out Henry at this point Stephan could go fuck himself you will forget him. 
Stephan, Fletcher and Henry all three were the cause of this. It was a mans game and youd somehow become a pawn for all three. You had to choose a side.
"Yes I think you should leave, this is reservation only I'm afraid." Henrys words had a bite to them anyone watching would assume Henry was just dealing with a gate crasher, no one other then the three of you would know how truley volatile the situation was.
"You? No..y/n I'm here for you! To take you back! Please I'm sorry give me one last chance? I love you baby I can't live with out you please?" You froze everything stopped what was he doing? What the fuck was he doing? Making a scene people watched as Stephan made a wild plea for you to take him back. He made a perfect storm, a brilliant and well thought out display.
Henry tensed holding you. You could feel it he wasn't prepared for this. Had Stephan just out witted the king himself in his own building. You held your breath unsure of what to do If he had was there a chance?. Could this be it? Your escape even if you didnt love stephan could you use this ruse to get away? To go into some form of witness protection?
"Ha! Honestly Stephan you think she hasn't heard?" You took a step back to Henry holding his wrist. No you wont take that chance not now. You have to settle, to just accept your lot with Henry for your own sanity. You had only moments ago realised where you stood and now had some understanding of what this was!. And if you was honest with your self you wasn't willing to trust Stephan he was to little to late.
"You've lost your job, your home everything! What could you possibly offer her? Safety? Please" you faltered at Henry's words were all but laughed out mocking. He lost his job? If so it wasn't safe you picked up on the hidden meaning to his words. You would not be safe. Stephan would not be safe. Not if you took this chance.
You placed a hand to Henry's chest and swallowed your throat closed up as tears sprang to your eyes. You looked stephan dead in the eye his face dropped. He knew. Before he could speak another word you gave your answer through trembling lips.
"I-I said leave! Your a liar! You played me I was a job Stephan and I will not be used again...Leave and don't ever come back. I-I'm with Henry now, we are happy and planning a future and I don't need you around trying to ruin what we have." You shuddered tears rolling down your face. Henry pulled you closer, you just hoped Stephan realized that you did this of our own accord, that henry was giving you a choice and the fact of the matter is you chose this beautiful dastardly man.You had to turn away from him tucking yourself into Henry's side.
"You heard the lady, she chose me now leave" 'while you can' those three words went without saying, hanging in the air. Stephan stood his ground trying to plead with you that he had somewhere to take you, somewhere safe but you just shook your head. 
"No! I dont want you! I dont need you! Im happy with how things are and I can't believe youxd do this after all this time?!" You were trying to get through that he was to late the damage was done and youd already made up your mind, your reasons were unclear even to you but he doesnt need to know that all he needed to know was that you were staying exactly where you were.
"But baby you don't understand I was trying-" you shook your head at him desperately wanting hi  to stop youd made your decision.
"Enough! Stephan...Ive moved on its to late now go! And dont ever look for me again!" You moved wanting those to be your final words. You turned your back on stephan and looked up to Henry and leaned in to him whispered below your breath.
"Make him leave, please daddy" Henry felt a warmth spread through him as you made the request. You wanted him to intervene to make this boy leave. He would definatly help, protect his babygirl. He acted quickly.
"Security! See to stephan here escort him out" you tore your head up watching as three men apprehended him dragging him through the space to the entrance whre he was destined after that you didn't know. You took a deep breath looking around slowly  everyones eyes were on you. Henry growled and snapped at them making the restaurant begin the nights festivities. You stood hugging him a few seconds more then pulled you back slowly.
"Good girl...Such a good girl you did the right thing. My little love. The right thing." He pulled you in pressing his lips against yours slowly not forcing anything just happy to let you remain there in his arms. He moved slowly escorting ou back to yur table where a waitress brought out your meal after a few moments.
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After the incident you found it hard to relax and only did so once back home. The rest of the night was overshadowed by it dread rolled in your stomach Henry was tense. And that normally meant bad things for you. If henry was angry with you he hid it well through dinner and you both tried salvaging the evening in your own ways. But even hree slices of cheesecake couldnt lift your spirits completely.
Once in the house he slammed the front door it echoed down the halls. You flinched and turned to him But he bypassed you and shouted loudly into the house standing tall shoulders back he was itching for a fight ou could tell he wanted to break somehing. Someone.
"LUKE GET YOUR FUCKING ASS OUT HERE!" Within a few short moments Luke came running stuttering.
"Hen-Sir I didn't know but we have him in-" he was knocked clean off his feet as Henry swung for him. No warning nothing just one fast powerfull fist connecting with his jaw. You screamed jumping back, the commotion got kals attention as the huge dog came barreling in to the foyer barking and growling on the defensive. You ignored the usually sweet now frightening canine watching the scene before you unfold shaking head to toe. Youd never seen henry hit someone before...not like that, he meant that he wanted to cause real damage then.Once his victim was on the floor he crouched wagging a finger at him.
"Hair dye...Thats all he needed to avoid you....your really loosing your touch about as quickly as I'm loosing fucking patience....This fuck up, your fuck up ruined my night! What was supposed to be our first date down the fucking drain because you let it slip A-FUCKING-GAIN! I don't care where he is, infact I don't want you to tell me but you get the info out of him and release him...Do not kill him" Henry stood at his full height hissing looking to you then clenched his jaw. Brilliant! Fucking brilliant you were shaking in terror just how he wanted the fucking night to end! Not! He sighed running a hand acros his face then looked to the man still on the floor.
"Tell me that you've atleast set the room up for us and this night isn't a complete waste" the man on the floor nodded cupping his jaw that was hanging at a funny angle it looked broken. You tensed Henry was powerful muh more powerull then he looked.Henry sighed he didnt move he didnt want you to bolt.
"Love... I'm sorry I just...i know its scary but you know daddy would never ever hurt you...Not truley, please love stop looking at me like that... Could you come here please?....That's it good girl I'm sorry little one good girl just like that" you moved slowly past the man withering on the floor. And stood before Henry it took everything not to flinch from him as he moved to hold your waist and made his way to the stairs pulling you with him. You didn't fight him, you were scared stiff you doubted that even kal would protect you from his master. He walked you right up stairs to the bed room you winced seeing that things were out...Toys. He moved past you huffing and swearing leaving you to just stand and wait. He made his way into the bathroom tense he was angry, furious even. You shook unsure how to tread it had been a while since he was this angry and you wasn't sure who he was angry at. You, stephan or luke...You hoped it wasnt you.
You leaned on the dresser undoing the buckles on your shoes sighing once the sore soles of your feet hit the cool floor. You looked to the bed the sheets were changed. A dark purple satin with matching pillow cases a single black rose on your side of the bed and petals scattered about the place. It was romantic. Well until you saw the contraptions attached to the chair facing the bed which was intended for you to be placed upon. A large purple cilindrycal arch placed on the seat and..Well there was a very satisfying looking dildo sticking right up in the center and a small bobble textured silicone mat just in front of it, there were cuffs attached to the two back legs of the chair that would make the 'toy' take your weight you shivered unsure if you wanted to do this is he was in a mood. You shook your head best get to work calming him down.
You moved slowly to the bathroom he was hunched over the sink he looked up meeting your gaze in the mirror. you blinked moving behinde him hugging him from behind he froze in your arms hands still braced on the marble.
"Thank you daddy...tonight was fun even if he tried to ruin it" you pressed a kiss to his shoulder. He turned abruptly grasping your chin making you look in his eyes.
"You..you had fun..I thought you was upset?" you shook your head at him he sounded angry but you'd thought it was at you aparently not.
"Of course it was our first date...and we had our first dance I just...I wanted you to know that I'm greatfull" he blinked shaking you 
"LIES! How could you possibly? you wanted to go with him! to leave me! I LOVE YOU I FUCKING ADORE YOU AND YOU STILL WANT TO LEAVE ME! WHY? WHY DO YOU FUCK AROUND LIKE THIS? WHY DO YOU TRY TO MANIPULATE ME? MAKE A FOOL OUT OF ME IM YOUR LOVER YOUR SOULMATE! IS THAT NOT ENOUGH?!" you screamed struggling as his nails broke the skin of your arms."NO!-NO PLEASE I DIDN'T- I WASN'T PLEASE DADDY DON'T!" you cried out loud trying to grab him as he spun you around slamming you to the door making it close with a slam the sound ringing in your ear
"ADMIT IT! ADMIT TO ME WHAT YOU REALLY WANTED! YOU WANTED HIM YOU WANT HIM!" you shuddered as his eyes searched yours but found only tears you shook your head trying to pull back from him.
"P-ple-ease your hurting me..Daddy I'm here with you-I chose you. I-I want you daddy, pl-please let go" your crying seemed to get more out of control as you now struggled to speak breathing was difficult. He blinked your painfull whimpers cuting him deep as he realized he was the cause. It snapped him out of it as he saw that he had infact hurt you he let go taking heaving breaths. 
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He expected you to run but all you did was stay still sobbing your heart out before him clutching your bleeding arms. he moved a hand to you you managed not to flinch but he could see it you wanted to. You wanted to run from him. He swore and quickly wrapped you in his arms.
"Oh my god my love, my heart I'm sorry..I'm so sorry love please shush its okay your okay...shh shh I'm sorry daddy is here, come here my baby..My sweet sweet girl" he pulled you close and just like that he was soothing you again rubbing your back. you trembled and clutched onto him sobbing he took a deep breath.
"I-I'm s-sorry But I didn't I didn't want to go...I wanted to stay with you...He lied he used me im here..I decided to stay with you" he closed his eyes he knew you were coming around. He was just so angry. At Luke at Stephan and at himself. He had fucked up from word one he knew that. This wasn't the plan. He had so desperatly wanted to make tonight THE night. The meal and danceing having fun then bring you back to a romantic room and make love to you. To get your consent, to toy with you untill you were dripping begging for him and finally. finally spend himself inside you. And wake up tomorrow morning with you wrapped around him happy. tonight was supposed to be the first night of the rest of your lives. the introduction to your new life.but now that seemed the last thing that was going to happen, after manhandeling you like that he was sure you were now going to try and reject him completely. that this whole shit show was going to set the relationship back a good few weeks. you looked up cutely blushing.
"The..The bedroom is sweet...I like the sheets and...And the roses its romantic" he smiled down at you seeing that you was trying to overcome the little spat. He hummed grinning rubbing his hands across your back slowly feeling you unwind.
"You did ,did you? well I shall remember that" you opened you mouth then closed it slowly
"What is it? you looked like you was going to ask something very important then little one" you shuddered squirming under his gaze he noted you rubbing your thighs together.
"W-what is that thing? I-in there on the chair?" he smiled at your innocence and began ushering you to move so he could open the door guiding you out.
"That my love is a gift..For you mostly but I will also get some enjoyment out of it..It is called a sybian...Just think of it as my little babygirls very own rocking horse." he chuckled noticing you froze on the spot, he pressed you forward making you take step towards it.
"It rocks?" Henry laughed moving you closer.
"No my little love it does not rock, I have no doubt however that you will be once your on it...Not tonight tho I've my outburst has ruined our night already" you blinked you couldn't help being curious of the thing you blinked tilting your head, you might aswell start enjoying yourself afterall tonight youd made it clear you was going to stay of your own accord maybe its time to just take a leap of faith.
"No I want a go...And you did say its mine and that youd spoil me tonight...I want to play on it" his jaw dropped. What? Were you seriously initiating sex? It was the first time you'd started anything or even showed any real interest. He gulped looking from you to the expensive vibrator then you again. Could him clarifying your relationship have caused this change? Or was there something more at work, were their feelings involved. He wasn't sure but not one to kick a gift horse in the mouth he smiled nodding making you blush brightly and move forward running the tips of your fingers over the slim dildo inspecting it naively. Oh yes the night was back on track and Henry couldn't be more thrilled.
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words-for-holland · 4 years
Text
Happier (8) | T.H.
Summary: Tom, Harrison & Harry have a talk about Y/N. Our broken up couple has their first physical conversation with each other. Natalie has a little talk with a certain someone. Does another truth unfold?
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9
Masterlist
A/N: To the readers, thank you for all the support! More drama to come!
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Confrontation
No one likes it, but sometimes it’s needed to get a point across. Another use, to threaten another and instill fear, but we’ll get to that when we cross that bridge.
Harrison and Harry settled Tom down in the kitchen, ready to confront him about everything that’s happened. Tom fidgets with his fingers, unsure of what’s to come. All he knew, was he was furious that they both went to see Y/N, and didnt tell him. “Look”, Tom starts off, clearly impatient waiting on their prepared speech. “I just want to know why you left to see Y/N and didn’t tell me. Why am I being kept in the dark with everything?”
“Becuse you couldn’t figure it out. Even after being baby fed the information.” Harry says abruptly, his arms crossed as he stared down at his brother
Tom scoffs at the response, rolling his eyes. “How can I figure anything out when you all keep it a secret from me?! Mind you that all of this involves MY girlfriend and OUR relationship! And you have the balls to go out to find Y/N in secret and not tell me because I cant figure out a fucking thing in this chaotic fucking mess?!” Tom rants out, eyes and voice filled with anger and jealousy. He wasn’t sure if his yelling was towards the boys or if it was more toward himself, because deep down Tom knew he should have tried harder, but didn’t.
“No. Don’t you dare turn this on us, and make us look like we’re the bad guys.” Harrison snaps as he looks down at his best mate. “Just because you don’t know half the things that are going on, doesn’t mean you can be mad at us. Even when the words are written in stone, you’re still a complete div to not be able to comprehend it.”
“I dont understand.” Tom mutters as he looks at the table, trying his hardest to figure all this out. He had already talked to Natalie days ago about Kate and the pictures, but said she had nothing to do with it. They couldnt possibly mean there was more to the story other than Natalie being a complete piece of work.
“Read the fucking signs, Tom!” Harrison yells out. “I know you talked to Y/N that night about Kate and what did you say?”
Tom looks up at him, realizing what this is about. It wasn’t just about the pictures. It was more than that, something Tom should have realized and reacted to the moment it happened. “I said I was sorry and didn’t know what to say.” He mutters, his face now displaying a sense of guilt. “Fuck!” He whispers.
“Yeah start crying about it now you div!” Harry comments roughly, before continuing his speech. “Kate didn’t just backstab Y/N. She went behind the both of you. She was the spark that ruined your relationship, and you don’t know what to say to that?”
Tom shakes his head, realizing his mistake. For someone that works to display his emotions on screen, he failed miserably when it came to real life situations. It was miscommunication for him, the boys, and Y/N. In his mind, he was more pissed that Y/N was left there to think that he didnt care as much when in actuality he cared a lot. More than anyone would ever know, he cared the most. “No you all don’t understand that wasn’t my intention. Fuck!” He screams in frustration.
“Really and what was your intention then?” Harrison questioned, sarcastically intrigued to know Tom’s excuse.
“She lost her best friend. Fuck, she lost the only other person in her childhood that stood up for her, before this whole bullshit. That right there was more important than our relationship. I know shes the reason I got into this PR mess, the runors exploding, and pushed Y/N away fron me, but Kate betrayed Y/N’s friendship and trust. I didn’t say shit because I didnt want to make it about us. I wanted it to be about her and what she needed.” Tom spilled out, sighing deeply. Silence filled the air, and neither spoke for a minute, sinking in everything that’s happened.
“What she needed was you, Tom.” Harry said as both he and Harrison made their way out the kitchen, not until leaving Tom with a final warning. “We get that Kate maybe the reason she started all of this....but that doesn’t mean it ends with her.”
It left Tom wondering. Again, he had just talked to Natalie about the whole blackmail pictures but said she had nothing to do with it. Then again, she always wanted him to push away from Y/N. A talk he hoped would clear some answers, only left him with more questions. He knew who he had to talk to if he wanted straight answers, and she was going to give them whether she liked it or not.
Y/N had managed to avoid Tom the first week of her return in London. Sadly, it could only be said for that one week, and she had no one to thank, but a sink filled with dirty dishes to wash. Tom made his way into the kitchen by chance to grab sa quck bite to eat when he saw Y/N. It was his chance, he had to take it. It was now or never.
As he walked in, he made eye contact with her to which she responded with a slight smile and a nod. It was silent, nothing but the clashes of dishes and water running. “Do you want some help?” Tom asked with a smile. Might as well make the first move, he was a gentleman after all.
Y/N nodded as she handed him a dish towel, implying for him to dry and stack the dishes away while she washed. They continued this routine for a while, until Tom couldn’t take it anymore. “What happened to us Y/N? We were never like this in person. Hell the phone conversations we had the past weeks are more lively than this.” He confesses as he looks into her eyes.
Y/N shakes her head as she returns to her dishes. “There’s just nothing to say anymore. We’ve said everything we needed to say....Now things are just clockwork.”
“That’s not true. I know you still are keeping things from me. There’s more to this than Kate...” He waits for her to answer, but judging from the hesitation and the look of fear that dwelled in her eyes, his assumption was correct.
“You want to know everything?” Y/N asks as she looks in his eyes.
“Yes. I want to help you. I want us to be back to where we used to be before you left.”
Y/N sniffles as she shakes her head. “We can’t.”
“Why not?” He asks softly, hoping she will open up.
Y/N looks at Tom, taking a deep breath before she decides to tell him. She thought of the possibilities and the consequences that would come about. Kate was gone but it didnt mean Unknown wasn’t still out there. Everything had been so quiet the past few days, it almost seemed like she could breathe without having someone threaten her. Then again maybe her subconcious was right. Maybe it wasn’t a person anymore...Maybe it was just her.
Her mind wandered to Tom, who was staring at her waiting patiently for her story. Opening up her mouth, would be unleashing Pandora’s box and all hell could break loose. Blackmail, shattered dream, shattered relationship, broken trust, it would all come to the surface. The worst part...it wouldnt just stop there. But in this moment, Y/N didnt care. She had kept things bottled up from him for as long as she had. He deserved to know, he was a part of this as much as everyone. Maybe if Y/N kept Tom at bay, it would just be enough to statisfy Unknown and keep things as they were. Safe.
“Before I left...” Y/N starts off, her lower back leaning against the sink, eyes looking down as she lets out a deep sigh. “ There were already rumors of you and Natalie. Speculations that you’d be an item.”
“And you believed that?” Tom interrupts, his eyes rolling, unamused by how the story was starting. “Y/N if you were just jealous. Why didn’t you just say —“
“You think I didn’t know that?” Y/N fires back, scowling her eyes towards Tom, only to receive a knowing look from him that indicated to stop lying to herself. “Whatever. Yeah maybe I was a little when I saw how close you two got and how it just built the rumors. Did I want to tell you? Sure, but that didnt mean I could.”
“Im not following.” Tom comments, his messy eyebrow raised in confusion. “So you wanted to tell me..but couldn’t?”
Y/N nods, taking in another deep breath. “As the days went by, I started getting unknown text messages. At first they started off vague, saying how I didn’t belong with you. Look how much happier you were with Natalie. Did he ever do that with you? Did he ever smile at you like that? I bet he doesn’t love you anymore.”
Y/N’s eyes water as she relived the conversations, small sniffles escaping her nose. Tom was at a loss for words. He couldn’t for the life of him understand why someone would text complete lies to her. He was getting mad by the second as he heard each insulting sentence that came out of her mouth. “Y/N..” he says.
She shook her head as she continued. “But the insults started to become threats. They knew everything about me and was willing to use you as blackmail. If I didn’t breakup with you...they’d make sure you’d never live out your dream again. And for the life of me I wasn’t going to let that happen.” She cried, hiding her sobbing face in hands.
Tom quickly rushes to her, taking away her hands so he could look into her eyes. He held her close, cradled her tiny body into his arms as she tried to slow her breathing. “Then I found out Kate was behind the pictures and the start of the rumors, and now we’re here. I don’t know what to do anymore Tom. Everything’s just been so fucked up.”
“Hey, its okay. Im okay. I’m not gonna let them hurt you like this.” He cooed. “I dont give a fuck if it ruins my career or not. I care about you. You come first, that’s not going to change. But it’s over now, right? Let’s just move on from it. Ill break the PR, I’ll make sure Kate doesn’t walk away from this without serious consequences, I wont keep you a secret if it means it’ll fix everything.”
Y/N pushes away from Tom, reluctantly. She knew how much he cared for her. He was willing to risk everything just to make sure they would be okay, and in a perfect world, maybe that would have been enough. Could live happily ever after and not have to worry about anything anymore. Both could just walk away from it all if they wanted, but this wasn’t a perfect world. “Just because Kate started it, doesn’t mean it’s over. Unknown could still be out there.” She whispers, afraid of anyone listening.
“Then we find out. Together.” He responds, holding her hand. “I let you slip away once. Im not letting it happen again.”
He looked into her eyes, almost silently asking to hug her once more. Two embrace each other, and stay like that for a while. It had been so long since they felt this sort of comfort, which brought up a familiar and warm feeling for each them. So warm, so familiar...they almost didn’t want to let go. Y/N breathed into him, taking in his cologne, the one she had grown to love over the three years. It felt right. It was home.
But not all moments can last forever. Behind the thin walls was Natalie, who had overheard and seen the entire conversation. Hearing Tom, mention how he’d break the PR for Y/N and how he’d do anything, risk everything to find Unknown, rubbed her the wrong way. The way Tom held Y/N close, made Natalie furious, and as soon as she heard her phone ring, she answered. “He knows you exist.”
“A slight hiccup. He’s so caught up in Y/N, he just can’t see the real you.” The voice reassured. “Dont worry, he’ll love you when she’s out of the picture.”
“There is no out of the picture anymore. You should have heard him...He wont let her go this time.” Natalie answers, discouraged more than ever.
“Then we just have to up the antics. Clearly her dim-witted friend ruined the original plan. Thats the last time I ever trust an American do the dirty work. She can start a fire but can’t be beothered to finish a job. ” The voice scoffs. “If the messages don’t work, threaten her in person. Alone. Make sure Tom doesn’t see you.” The voice orders.
“You know it wont work. She’s not as afraid as she was before.” Natalie whispers as she continues to watch them from a distance.
“Then we’ll give her something to be afraid of. Why do you doubt me?” The voice asked, challenging Natalie. “Is this what you wanted?”
Natalie hesitates. Of course she wanted Tom more than anything in the world, but to what point? To what cost? These questions swirled around her mind as she thought back to how Y/N and Tom interacted in the kitchen. Their bond was so strong, they always found a way back to each other. For a moment...she felt almost bad. “Of course I want Tom.” She answers “but.. I want him to love me the way he loves Y/N.”
The voice scoffs at her response.loud enough for Natalie to hear the disgust in her voice. “Haven’t I taught you anything? Love is superficial gets you nowhere in life. You’re lucky enough that we’re settling for Tom.”
“I...I guess.”
“Then you’ll make sure Y/N stays away. Im doing this for you Natalie. Fame, fortune, your career, and your superficial love life. I want what’s best for you.” The voice becomes calmer more gentle, yet the sinisterness was still very present.
“Yes...mother.” Natalie says sourily.
“Darling, how many times have I told you to only refer to me as your publicist? Now go, before someone finds out about this.” The line drops, and Natalie focuses her eyes on Y/N who leaves for her room. Her eyes narrow, and fill with jealously and guilt. Her mother’s words replying her mind. “He will love you...just get rid of the girl.”
Taglist:
@hollanddolanfangirl @ifilosemyselfagain @hevjadams @averyfosterthoughts​ @fangirl-with-a-mission @drishtisikarwar @eridanuswave​ @ifntelyinspirit @trumpettay @astridcommings @parkershoco @racewife2004 @sleepybesson @greatpizzascissorstaco @andievgs @joyleenl @holland-bowen @in-a-lot-of-fandoms-tbh @viwihere @marvelobsessedteenager
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rowaning · 3 years
Conversation
The Complete Fiction of HP Lovecraft rated by me, someone who read them all* but has a terrible memory
The Beast in The Cave: uh a guy goes on a cave tour and finds a creature that was like a human that got lost and adapted to its surroundings. 0/10 just because im pretty sure there was another one with this exact premise and neither of them were memorable at all.
The Alchemist: dude achieves immortality and lives in the narrators basement and has pledged to murder his entire lineage or something. 4/10 the alchemy stuff was actually kind of interesting
The Tomb: im pretty sure this is the one where a guy starts hanging out in a tomb and like travels back in time/becomes one of his ancestors? 5/10 if its the one im thinking of i did enjoy reading it
Dagon: guy lands on a mysterious island with signs of a long dead civilization. 1/10 i do not remember what happened in it
A Reminiscence of Dr. Samuel Johnson: 0/10 i have no memory of this
Polaris: also 0/10 i forgot all about it
Beyond the Wall of Sleep: could be any of the dream focused ones. if its the one about the dude sailing into the void or whatever than 4/10 not too bad
Memory: ironically, i dont remember it. 0/10
Old Bugs: 1/10 for the title god i wish i remembered this one
The Transition of Juan Romero: i got nothing. 0/10
The White Ship: this might also be the one about the dude sailing into the void? i liked that one he lived in a lighthouse and boarded a dream ship and just fucking left it was fun. 4/10
The Street: uh i think really steep street that didnt actually exist. 3/10
The Doom that Came to Sarnath: i wanna say another one of the dream centered ones where a town discovers some old relics and blatantly disrespects them and gets exactly whats coming to it. 5/10 they deserved what they got
The Statement of Randolph Carter: ok this dude shows up several times. i think this one is about how he returns to his childhood home then travels back in time and creates a time loop paradox thing. 1/10 meh
The Terrible Old Man: uh some thieves harrass a weird old guy and get got. 5/10
The Cats of Ulthar: someone is mean to a cat in a dream city, all of the rest of the cats get revenge and are revered for the rest of time. 2/10 (-3 because lovecraft has a specific name he gives to apparently every fictional and real cat he encounters and wow i wish he hadn't)
The Tree: i feel like this is something to do with a person becoming a tree but i cant actually remember. 0/10
Celephais: yeah no i got nothing 0/10
The Picture in the House: also nothing 0/10
The Temple: nope 0/10
Facts Concerning the Late Arthur Jermyn and his Family: is this the one where the dude's great grandfather married an ape? i dont think so but im not sure. 0/10, -5/10 if it is that one cause that one was especially shitty
From Beyond: nope 0/10
Nyarlathotep: charismatic dude shows up and is like get in bitches we're going to the void. i love nyarlathotep cause hes the one who directly interacts with humanity and like wears a human suit or whatever so hes just some dude whos like hey im gonna feed you to azathoth 5/0
The Quest of Iranon: got nothing 0/10
The Music of Erich Zann: narrator makes friends with an old musician whos being hunted by supernatural forces. 2/10 because i remember it but it was just ok
Ex Oblivione: 1/10 for the title but i have no clue what it was about
Sweet Ermengarde: lovecraft's sole attempt at comedy. not to my taste like at all 0/10
The Nameless city: nope 0/10
The Outsider: also nope 0/10
The Moon-Bog: sounds cool, dont remember it. 0/10
The Other Gods: dude tries to find the gods of humanity where they live on a big mountain, actually finds them, is immediately smited by the Other Gods who protect the gods of humanity. 3/10 he deserved it
Azathoth: dont recall, 0/10
Herbert West- Reanimator: Arkham man Herbert West and his assistant ressurect the dead with little thought to the consequences, then get murdered by a band of said resurrected dead. 5/10
Hypnos: nope 0/10
What the Moon Brings: also nope 0/10
The Hound: still nope 0/10
The Lurking Fear: again, nope 0/10
The Rats in the Walls: dude returns to his ancestral home, hears rats, excavates the basement and finds out that his ancestors ate human flesh, eats his friend. 1/10 it was an interesting read but can lovecraft please stop calling cats that.
The Unnameable: no clue 0/10
The Festival: nope 0/10
*Under the Pyramids: ok im pretty sure this is the one with houdini which is the only one i could not read. i went into this mentally prepared for lovecraft's bigotry but i was not mentally prepared for him dropping harry houdini, avid skeptic who absolutely would have beat the shit out of him for this, into the middle of his super racist paranormal horror. -1000/10
The Shunned House: nope 0/10
The Horror at Red Hook: also nope 0/10
He: cool title, no memory of the story. 0/10
In the Vault: wow im bad at this. 0/10
Cool Air: still no 0/10
The Call of Cthulhu: kind of all over the place, there was a thing about artists and then a thing about a cop investigating a cult. 3/10 meh but ill give it a bonus for being a staple of horror fiction.
Pickman's Model: uh artist sees some wild shit and draws it and then it eats him. 2/10 i forget the details
The Strange High House in the Mist: if this is the one im thinking of, dude does a dangerous climb to find a mysterious house and meet the inhabitant who is kind of interdimensional and also being hunted by interdimensional things. also maybe the house eats people? 2/10
The Silver Key: another Randolph Carter one, and i think this is actually the one about him travelling back in time so idk what the other one was. 3/10
The Dream-Quest of Unknown Kadath: randolph carter goes on a quest in the dream world to find the gods of humanity and ask why they wont let him check out this cool city he can see from his window. lots of action and very wordy and went a lot of different places. 4/10 good read but extremely xenophobic
The Case of Charles Dexter Ward: guy investigates his ancestor who looks disturbingly like him, ancestor comes back to life and kills him and takes his place and a bunch of other stuff happens. mostly a dramatized genealogical study. 3/10 not bad, very suspenseful
The Colour Out Of Space: meteor lands on a farm, scientists get weirded out by it, everything in the area gets weird then dead, alien thing gets enough power from draining nearby life-forms to escape earth. fun twist ending. 4/10 bonus for being one of the better ones, detraction for writing out a 'rural accent'
The Descendant: nope, 0/10
The Very Old Folk: nope again, 0/10
History of the Necronomicon: very dry. fake history of lovecraft's fake book thats super important to a lot of the stories. 0/10
The Dunwich Horror: isolated witchy family has a kid who no one likes that grows up real fast. graphic descriptions of renovation. a horror gets unleashed on the area and the local folklore scholars have to deal with it. 1/10 nothing good enough to counter the xenophobia
Ibid: i remember this one. no idea what it's deal was. pseudo-bibliography? it was weird. 0/10
The Whisperer in Darkness: guy has a correspondance with another guy about local folk legends based on evil crab things. other guy gets straight up replaced by an evil crab thing and first guy doesnt even notice. imagine if you followed up on a scam email and didnt realize anything was up until you saw that the face of the dude you were talking to in person was a mask. 4/10 for the comedy this guy would not last in the internet age at all
At The Mountains of Madness: guy whines about penguins and how awful it would be if there were civilizations that predated humanity. also commits grave desecration. i get hit by the realization that if lovecraft was less of a racist coward he wouldve made a great speculative sci fi author. 3/10 i would love to watch that old asshole get absolutely torn to shreds by the monster fucker community
The Shadow over Innsmouth: Fish People! Leave Them Alone! Or Else! 5/10 the protagonist gets to live the dream by escaping human society and becoming an immortal fish person
The Dreams in the Witch House: dude rents an objectively haunted room, doesnt listen to people trying to help him, gets murdered by a weird rat. later they find a shit ton of bones in the attic. 2/10 meh
Through The Gates of the Silver Key: Randolph Carter transcends time and space, then de-transcends time and space and immediately gets stuck on another planet in the distant past, makes a long and difficult journey back to earth to find that his estate is being divided amongst his heirs. the comedy potential of a man stuck in an alien body dealing with a legal system that has declared him dead is not examined. 2/10
The Thing on the Doorstep: narrator's good friend marries a fish person witch who steals his body. thats basically it. 3/10. at this point im like wow these narrators really refuse to believe the heavily foreshadowed supernatural explanations that turn out to be correct huh.
The Evil Clergyman: dude is in a room. some ghosts (?) show up. dude has a UV light for some reason. Gets his face stolen i guess and just has to live with it. 5/10 for being absolutely buck wild and refusing to explain anything
The Book: nope 0/10
The Shadow Out Of Time: dude gets his body stolen by ancient scholar species. agonizes about it for a while. finds archaeological evidence of said species. finds a book he wrote while living with said species. almost gets eaten by something. 3/10 more cool speculative sci fi but lame protagonist
The Haunter of the Dark: you'd think id remember it bc this was the last one and i read it last night. oh wait, nvm i do remember it. dude finds an old box in a run down culty church and unleashes a horror that then comes and fucks him up. 1/10 meh.
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technowoah · 3 years
Text
Revolutions Always Fall
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You should've learned from L'Manburg. The Butcher Gang was a mistake.
- REQUESTED!
- I tried to put 2 requests in one here.
- its really long 🤧🤞🏽
Prompts!
13) "You made me lose all my faith and trust in you"
38) "They warned me about this.” “About what?” “You.” 
47)“Are you satisfied now...?”
⚠︎ memtions of blood, voilence, fighting, swearing, Technoblade's execution episode. Angst.
Masterlist!
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Dear Technoblade,
I wont make the same mistakes again
- an old friend. ♤
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Technoblade was always a threat, and you learned that from L'Manburg. You had befriended him when he joined Pogtopia and very quickly you two seemed to click. He saw the world through different eyes and that intrigued you. You wanted to be him, live life the way he does it for just a day.
He was a killing machine, he was smart tactical, but still had the thirst for blood that made him be so smart and tacitcal with how he kills.
You on the other hand were not a big fan of killing, but this war was an exception. This war made you practice, it made you angry, it lit a fire underneath you that you didnt know you had. Along with the other members of Pogtopia, Technoblade helped you fight, how to wield a sword, knife, gun, anything that you can get your hands on you turned it into a weapon, you Soon enough you had mastered weapons and you werent so passive.
You questioned yourself if this was living through Technoblade, the need to fight, hunt, to protect. You felt poweful. As you hold your own crafted swords in your hand you know what you can do. You could do so much damage with this sword, he gave you that sword. It wasn't special at all but you made it special, because in your eyes it was.
"You can do so much with a sword, people just don't know how to use it to its fullest potential. They dont know their full potential either. But now you do."
Thats what he said to you in between those stone walls called Pogtopia.
After what he said to you had done so. Used the sword to your full potential, used anything to your full potential. You wanted to be more and more you became.
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"You ready?" Technoblade smirked.
"Hell yeah Im ready to kill that bastard." You smiled
"Woah-oh! You weren't saying this a couple months ago."
"Schlatt deserves it. That's not L'Manburg. This is L'Manburg." You stretched out your arms to the others who were gathering armor and polishing their weapons for the battle yet to come.
You smiled knowing this will all end soon, you wouldn't be in a cave anymore, you wouldn't have to hide the fact that you knew where Wilbur was and that he was planning the attack, Pogtopia will be no more and L'Manburg would be back.
"L'Manburg will be back." You said while taking a sword out of a chest.
"Sure." You heard him scoff beside you.
"What's that supposed to mean?" You asked slightly offended. Wasn't he fighting for the same thing?
"I dont know. Revolutions always fall." He turned his back to you and walked away leaving you to your own thoughts.
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You hated it. He was right, he was always right and you hated it. And everyone else did too, they knew he was right. It wasnt what the majority wanted, we wanted L'Manburg while he didn't want to be held by government in the first place. That's what he meant that day in Pogtopia.
L'Manburg, one defeated, was now growing once more. After the "end" of L'Manburg you couldn't forgive him. Your anger and the feeling of betrayal kept growing and growing everyday, every time you picked up that damned sword he gave you. It was the best sword you had, you had enchanted it multiple times. You had to use it, but the only thing was the memories that came with it.
Your anger only worsened as time went on, having to hear about Technoblade and how he was such a threat to L'Manburg only made you want to destroy him and the past you two had created. That would be the closure you needed, but someone was already three steps a head of you.
In spite of your anger you and Quackity had the most magnificent idea to make a gang to finally kill Technoblade for the sake of L'Manburg. The idea was to go confront him at his house and take him back to L'Manburg for an execution. You were on board with the idea 100%. This was better for L'Manburg and better for yourself, finally someone who got you.
Quackity and you planned tirelessly to try and get Technoblade's location and bring him back. The Butcher Gang was made from the cabinet of L'Manburg. During these long days you two grew closer, you two were so different in ways of thinking, but you two shared the same end goal which worked out in your favor. You two went through hell and back just to find out that the easiest way to get to Technoblade was sitting in L'Manburg right at that moment. Philza, some may say Technoblade's only friend at the moment. He was loyal to Technoblade and you dont blame him at all, but you needed to find out where his companion was.
It was all going well, the Butcher Gang had put Phil on house arrest and Tubbo had found a compass that led them straight to Technoblade's location. Everything was going well and according to plan, you didnt want to show it on your face as you saw Technoblade's house from the spot in the woods the Butcher Gang was hiding in, but you wanted this so badly. You didnt where he was going to be, he could've came and bestowed more destruction. It was like knowing he was there, but not knowing when he was going to strike.
The anxiety that came with not knowing where Technoblade was always with you, but now it wont be.
The Butcher Gang ended up taking Technoblade by force back into the city. You were proud that you were all able to get the blood hungry pig-man to come back with you all. He was behind bars with an anvil hanging high over his head. As Tubbo gave his speech your short lived happiness soon faded as a man appeared and smoke filled the area. You started to get attacked by what seemed like Dream and Punz while Tubbo continued to yell for Quackity to pull the lever to finally kill Technoblade.
"Pull the lever Big Q!"
"Kill him Quackity!" You yelled with him.
He did it. The anvil fell fast towards Technoblade's body, but as fast as the anvil landed on him his skin, bones, and blood regenerate and return to its normal state. Your eyes widened as the totem in his hand began to disintegrate into gold dust.
"DAMMIT!" You yelled in agony while Ranboo and Fundy continued to fend off Dream and Punz until they retreated.
Once they did you realized Technoblade was gone, you saw him in the distance running away from the scene, but you couldn't let this happen. You couldn't let the fear of Technoblade being out there doing God knows what forever. The fear of him boiled in your heart as you broke out into a sprint towards Technoblade.
As you ran into a more secluded area you heard footsteps behind you. You glances back to see Quackity following your lead with an axe in his hand. Slowing down a bit you both ran side by side.
"Let's get this son of a bitch!" Quackity huffed as you both came across a cave.
You both knew Technoblade was in there so you both prepared for the mental and physical pain you would both endure. This wasn't like the Butcher Gang where it was 5 against 1, it was 2 against 1 and you've seen Technoblade fight this fight before.
"You ready to kill this bastard?" He calmed his breathing down.
"Of course I am." You kept your eyes foward.
You walked deep into tha cave to see 6 chests and a sign that said "final control room", that bastard. Wanting to be quiet you tried to sneak up on Technoblade, but Quackity's anger got the best of him.
"What the fuck is this Technoblade?! What the hell are you doing here?" He asked gripping his sword too tight.
"It not what it looks like." Technoblade airly laughed. He had an enchanted pickaxe in his hand and an open chest with netherite armor.
"How the hell did that anvil not kill you?!" Quackity yelled.
Technoblade started laughing, he was laughing, he was taunting us. "Do you really think that death can stop me? That you could kill me that easily."
Your emotions tried to get the best of you as you tried not to let frustrated tears fall onto your cheeks.
"How did you do it? What... How did you even do that?"
"You think that can stop me Quackity?" Technoblade asked again.
"Just answer the fucking question!" You yelled before either of them could speak. It was silent for a while before Technoblade slowly spoke up.
"A totem. I used a totem of undying. I always have it on me." He smugly said.
He continued on. "You know what?! You know what? Ive got a lot to say, I was gonna say it at the trial, but we got a little bit interrupted. You know I tried convincing you guys that government was not the answer, the government was actually the cause of all your problems!"
You rolled your eyes as he continued his infamous speech.
"I tried to convince you guys by fighting alongside you as brothers and you cast me aside, you used me. I tried to use force, but you still formed a government! And when I went into hiding, when I retired, when I swore off violence, you hunted me down, you hurt my friends." Technoblade finished.
"Techno you dont understand what we're fighting for!" You started finally finding your voice. "I thought you were for us! You were always against us!"
"I was always for you! I needed you guys to understand!"
"We needed YOU to under-"
Technoblade interrupted you. "You dont understand me! You never did!"
"At least I fucking tried and you gave me so much shit for it! I wanted to be you Technoblade. I wanted to see life through your eyes, I was fascinated by how you walk, fight, your mind."
Your anger began to subside as you continued to speak. "But, you made me lose all my faith and trust in you."
Technoblade laughed again. "Same here! You guys left me! Betrayed me so-"
"So the feeling is mutual." You growled.
It was quite for a minute, but you could feel Quackity's sympathetic stare as you poured your feelings out to a man who dosen't even matter to you.
"They warned me about this." Your arms gestured to the area the three of you were in.
"About what?" Technoblade scoffed.
"About you." You stared at Technoblade. It wasn't a glare, it was more calm.
"Quackity, Tubbo, Fundy...Even Ranboo." You airly chuckled.
You had stopped talking trying to get yourself back together. Quackity caught that you weren't talking anymore so he spoke up.
"What we have up there is a country and what we need here is organization and power. And I dont care how long it fucking takes me or what I have to do to get you Techno. Im going to fucking kill you. Im going to kill you Technoblade." Quackity gripped his axe in his hand.
"I just have one question Quackity." Techno smirked.
"What do you have?" Quackity responded and you took the sword out of the sheath hanging on your hip.
"Do you think you two are enough to kill me? Even unarmed with iron armor?" Technoblade closed the chest that held netherite armor signaling he didn't need that. "Do you think you both could take me?"
"Oh we do." You spoke up. "We need this, Technoblade."
"You know what?" Quackity rose his axe and you followed suit. "Lets find out you son of a bitch!" He charged towards Technoblade and you followed close behind.
Technoblade started running out of the long cave, but you two followed. He threw potions on the ground as he turned around and fought us head on. You were able to get a couple of cuts and hits on him, but he was cutting you more with his pickaxe.
The thing about Quackity was that he thought he was invincible. He kept going full force towards Technoblade, hopefully he would focus on him so you could finally get a critical hit on him. Your heart rate kicked up as your face came too close to his pickaxe. And it kept going, each swing he took towards you became closer and closer until Quackity slashed his arm with his axe.
Technoblade whipped his head his way. "I have a pickaxe and I'll put it right through your teeth!"
Technoblade swung his axe and slashed Quackity's face, including his eye. He then turned his pickaxe to the flat side and swung it, hitting the side of his head. The blow to his head sent him flying against one of the walls of the cave, knocking him out.
He then turned to you and in a flash you could tatse the metal of his pickaxe as it swiped across your face blinding one of your eyes as well as Quackity's. He had hit you on the side of the head like he did with Quackity. Your body was aching as you fell to the ground, your mind slowly shutting down. You were loosing a lot of blood quickly, and so was Quackity. You two knew you were going to find the strength to get out of this cave and follow Technoblade's path out.
You laid on the cave's cold floor realizing that this was a mistake. You were too loyal, easily swayed, you were a follower. You never knew when to stop, from L'Manburg to Pogtopia to The Butcher Gang you seeked things you couldn't have. You couldn't have L'Manburg, neither Pogtopia, you couldn't kill Technoblade and ease your fears snd anxieties. You need to seek that some where else.
Your mind began to slip, and you fell into unconsciousness.
You should've learned. He was right. Revolutions always fall.
The Butcher Gang was a mistake.
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Dear Technoblade,
I remembered the day. It still pains me. The day you spawned those wither. I thought you were the traitor, but turns out I was wrong at the time. Im sorry for that.
I also remember when you left me for dead. But I made it out as you see.
But now I am resigning from L'Manburg. Im going my own way, my own path, and I don't want you on my path.
Think of this as closure, something I never got. As I am writing this I dont know why I am giving you closure, lifting a weight off of your shoulders, you dont deserve it.
I know people say that to you alot.
You really made a dent in this damned place.
I hate what you're doing. You get to live in solitude while we get to live in the debris you left here. I wanted to be like you.
I hate to say it, but I learned a lot from you. I hated what I learned, about myself, about you, about the current state of this horrible place.
I wont make the same mistakes again
Are you satisfied now?
- an old friend ♤
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