#i already hate living in this homophobic ass town why THE FUCK would she try and make it worse

[spotify-kids-real]

guys my moms trying to make my life worse. its so funny. I WILL ACTUALLY START HARMING MYSELF ISTG

#shes trying to put a time limit on my phone #like 2 hours a day or sum #and i know im overreacting or whatever #but i have 2 irl friends who dont want to talk to me half the tme #and one of them doesnt respect my bounderies #llike deadass my moms not making it anybetter #like holy hell #tw sh #i will fucking kms /nsrs #i already hate living in this homophobic ass town why THE FUCK would she try and make it worse #crying rn #not in the good way

[harmonyverendez]

Dating Them | Crystal Gems + Greg & Rose Quartz - Steven Universe

~

Steven Universe

• Oh my! You two relationship is just so pure.

•. This boy would do anything for you.

" Do you need anything y/n?".

" Why don't I go to school with you today?".

" Oh my God! Steven, you can't go to school with me!".

"it doesn't hurt to try y/n".

• Forehead kisses here and there.

• Always looking out for you.

• Wakes you up with breakfast. ( Even though sometimes they are burnt. Leave the kid alone, he tried )

• You go on some of his missions. And he hates it sometimes. Doesn't want you to get hurt.

• the First kiss, was under a mistletoe ( Set up by Garnet * Wink Wink * )

• The Town people not understanding you two's relationship.

• Of course you get a lot of hate. Especially from Lars ( Idiot )

• I don't know. He is just so pure. Just don't break his heart, and he'll be yours forever.

Garnet ( + Ruby & Sapphire )

Sapphire

• You met Sapphire first. She was such a sweetheart. Always willing to protect her from Blue Diamond. ( Even to risk your life )

• The other gems do not like you, because you bring out the wild side and confident side of Sapphire.

• Always looking out for your future. She would shatter her gem if she finds out you are dead or your future is black.

• Slow dances, her having her hands on your waist and your hands would be on her shoulders.

• Major Height differences ( You are taller or shorter.)

• Not giving a shit if people don't like your relationship. It's not their places.

• Homeworld is slightly homophobic. They don't date or do anything like that.

• I won't lie, you two fused for at least a week one time and liked it. Your fusion was stable and calm. Very beautiful even, but you two were new to it. You didn't understand.

• Running away from homeworld and coming to earth to live a better life.

• Ended up meeting Rose and her pearls. And everything was okay.

Ruby

• Oh! She would be so protective over you. Would not let you out of her eyesight.

• if the other rubies try to harm you. The ass would be having damaged Gemstone to their homes.

• Always holding your hand when you get nervous.

• going for long walks in the forest.

• You two always singing and dancing.

• Fused at least 5 times. What? Miss girl was curious, and what Ruby says, what goes.

• Not giving a flying fuck what the other think.

• You always have to look over your shoulders just in case.

• Ruby teaching you how to fight.

• And you teaching her how to draw, create things, and flowers. Etc

Garnet

• oh my God! She would be so protective over you.

• on certain days you are allowed to see her. Because she is always out.

• Jamee falling in love with you. But is sad when he sees Garnet kissing you.

• Everyone in beach city loves you.

• Always picking and messing with Lars and Sadie. Teasing them, and making them squirm.

• Helping Steven with his homework.

• Fixing anything in the house that is destroyed.

• Garnet and you two going on the beach and relaxing. Her arms were around you and your head lay on her chest. Forehead kisses and hand squeezes.

• Lots and lots of kisses.

• Practice mediation.

• You already knew Garnet before you met. Why? Because you knew Sapphire or Garnet before meeting the rest of the Crystal gems. You dated one of them, so Garnet recognize you.

• Cheek kissing, Neck kisses. Etc

• Garnet loves showing you off.

• whispers sweet nothings in your ear.

• She will, love cherish and protect you forever.

Pearl

• Oh, she doesn't like human food, she thinks it's disgusting because they come out the backside.

• Since you can cook. She tasted your food for the first time and loved it. She says she doesn't like food. But every once in a Blue Moon, she wouldn't mind eating your food.

• Always brush your hair and doing your makeup.

•She loves it when you wear girly things, bows, hair products, jewelry, ballerina outfits. Etc

• Can't fit your shoes. Since her feet are too big for you. So she'll make all your shoes and you love them.

• Slow dances with you.

• Likes to do your laundry and such

• Is a total sweetheart.

• Teachingg you sword fights and such.

• Gets envious when someone else looks your way. Always hiding you from the dangerous world.

• Massages your feet, and does everything or anything you ask.

• No Questions asked.

• Etc.

Amethyst

• Is a goofball..

• Always cracking jokes to make you laugh.

Hey Y/N watch this? ".

" Yes Amy?".

Protect over you as always.

• But there are some days when you will have to comfort her. Because of her past and insecurities.

• Both of you being there for each other.

• Not letting anyone driving you away.

• You are here to stay baby.

• Cheek kisses, forehead kisses, nose kisses, nuzzles here and there.

• Always shape-shifting to make you laugh. But then you figure out the meaning behind them.

• Basically she will bow to you. You are here Queen.

Rose Quartz

• Not knowing deep down she is Pink Diamond ( But hey that's another story for another day )

• Forming a rock band together.

• Hated when she grew to like Greg..

• Confronted her about it and she laughs it off. Of course, she liked him, he was funny. But you? You were her everything.

• Major height differences ( she is 8'ft tall and you are under 6 or 7. but she will always be taller )

• Playing with her giant curls.

• You met her when she first arrived. She was all cute and lonely. She shows her around and instants you two formed a bond.

• Pearl envies you because of Rose. She wants the woman all to herself. But it's flattered.

• Always in her room. ( Doing who knows what )

• Rose taking care of you

• Fused 2-3 times with. Both of your two fused names were either " Rainbow Quartz" or " Galaxy Quartz".

• You two are relationship goals.

Greg Universe

• Yeah, young Greg looks just like Steven. It's amazing really.

• Always goes to his rock convert even when no one is there.

• he always have your back.

• hanging out and driving around in his van.

• playing and braiding his hair.

• Deep, passionate kisses.

• Always leaving town on dates.

• To see the stars.

• This man knows you are the woman of his dreams

• teaching you how to play the guitar.

• Siting on the beach and enjoying life.

• He would do anything for you.

• Etc.

AM I MISSING SOMETHING? TELL ME WHAT YOU think. IT TOOK ME NEARLY 2 HOURS TO WRITE THIS. SO ENJOY.

THANK YOU - Aaliyah❤️

#steven universe #garnet #Greg #Steven #Pearl #rose quartz #homeworld #Relationship #Romance #dating #headcanon

[avionvadion]

Sessrins do not interact. You will be blocked on site and without question. Stay in your own god damn tags. We are not changing the anti tag either. The point of it is to AVOID the tag if you don’t like it. Stop doing the stupid.

RAGE FILLED RANTING BELOW.

(I did not filter my language. I’m like this close to throwing up. I’m so sick of this. This last episode better be the last because-)

Ah yes. Nothing to make an already not-so-good day worse is by Sunrise possibly getting a season 2 for Trashahime. Gods, I feel sick. How are they even getting approval for it???

It’s ratings have been dropping since episode 15 because of the obvious child grooming and pedophilia, and even more since the blatant homophobic, transphobic, and racist displays, and the continued disrespect towards the OG cast. What the hell even is the plot?????

Finding the dream butterfly?? Well no one seems to care about that. Definitely don’t put any effort into searching for it. Defeating Kirinmaru??? Well no one seems to care about that either. Man doesn’t even seem to care or remember what his own evil scheme is. Zero???? Sorry who is she again??? Some scorned lady who made rainbow pearls from tears because Toga said he wasn’t interested in her?? Oh wait- suddenly the reason why tetsusaiga and tenseiga exist has changed?? Trashahime is literally rewriting all the lore that was stated previously in the original Inuyasha series??

Well gee, that does explain SOMETHING here. Or does it? Because why, if in all that time in the OG series when the rainbow pearls were “existing”, didn’t Naraku think to grab them alongside the Shikon Jewel???? Not to mention the new time wheel or whatever which can REWIND TIME.

SO THE ENTIRE TIME IN THE OG NARAKU COULD HAVE KILLED INUYASHA, STOLEN THE JEWEL, AND COULD HAVE EVEN FORCIBLY TAKEN KIKYO LIKE HE WAS PLANNING!??? As a result, Kagome would never have come to the feudal era because the Jewel would never form inside her body, Miroku would have been swallowed up by the Wind Tunnel, alongside any illegitimate kids he might have had, and Sango would have never lost her village. BUT HE DIDN’T!???? WHY!????

This is the most evil, sinister, douche canoe, mastermind in anime itself. A monster who has killed thousands of people- murdered entire towns and villages on a whim, and to create a mother freaking river of blood to open a gate to the underworld, who had been plotting for over FIFTY YEARS. This is a man who sold his soul to demons because he was so lust-hungry for a god damn priestess and was bitter towards Inuyasha for “stealing her” from him. You KNOW he would have snatched up those pearls. You KNOW he would have used that dumbass time wheel to make things work in his face.

BUT HE DIDN’T. Why? Oh, I know!!! Her’s what the explanation is!! Because it’s not god damn canon and Sunrise is pulling things out of their asses to make a story that doesn’t make sense and has zero continuity at all- so much so to the point that they’re trying to rewrite the original and ret-conning next to everything that involves Inu no Taisho/Toga/Inupapa.

The protagonists have zero motivation, don’t care about anything, never ask questions, and are literally just existing for the purpose to exist because a perverted old man (Sumisawa) wants to live out a fantasy where he can have a child bride. 🤢 There’s no way this can be getting a second season. No way.

If this followed OG Inuyasha at all, MirSan would have been busting their asses to find InuKag and save them. Koga would have murdered Yawaragi (?)(I don’t know her stupid name) for selling Moroha into slavery AND he never would have pawned her off to someone else at all!!! This is KAGOME’s kid. Koga would kill himself before letting anything happen to Kagome or Moroha.

And Sesshomaru. LORD SESSHOMARU. This man despises schemes. Loathes them. He hates manipulation. He is straight forward, proud, and the literal guardian of children. He would never go along with Kirinmaru, and he sure as hell wouldn’t marry one of the two kids he’s been protecting for a solid year. Rumiko Takahashi herself stated that his ideal WOMAN was someone ELEGANT and REFINED. Not a freaking wild child.

There is no “great 14 year scheme” that’s in the planning. Not with Sesshomaru. That isn’t even Sesshomaru in the god damn Trashahime garbage hole!!!! They’re nothing more than cheap imitations.

And Rin. She was eight years old when she lost her parents and brothers to bandits, and became a traumatized mute because of it. She was then repeatedly abused by the villagers who took her in. Later, she was killed by wolves. Revived by Sess, she travelled with him. Later dies AGAIN because her soul got snatched away when she was kidnapped to the underworld. Revived by InuKimi.

And- what??? You mean to tell me she’s supposed to be dying for a THIRD TIME in the trash heap you call a show??? Dying, after having been raped and abused by the adult who was meant to be a safe space, a guardian, a protector. Forced to give birth. And no one fucking cared. A fifteen year old girl.

Yeah, no. This ain’t Inuyasha. It’s a fucking insult. To the series, to those who hold the series close to their hearts, and to those who have gotten out of some very very dark times because of this series being such a comfort.

And it makes me sick to the stomach knowing this... this awful disgusting trash is possibly getting a second season. Just let the garbage burn already. Please. Nobody wants this. Everything after episode 3 just went to shit. Just stop. You’re no “true fan”. You just want to destroy it. Make people ashamed of having watched or read Inuyasha. Stop fucking pretending to care and own up to your own bullshit. Please.

#Inuyasha #trashahime #anti yashahime #anti sessrin #anti rinsess #anti grooming #anti sunrise #inukag #mirsan #koga #lord Sesshomaru

[invisibleanonymousmonsters]

I used to be seventeen.

Character: Steve Rogers x Tall!Reader – High School AU

Summary: Steve Rogers doesn’t think fondly of his teenage years. Well, there was one thing he did remember fondly – or, more specifically, one person. 

Word Count: 4,300 - One Shot

Warnings: Bullying, homophobic themes 

Steve always hated coming back home. Yes, he loved seeing his mom and friends. But even the glamour of the holiday glow couldn’t get rid of the bitterness Steve held for his hometown.

He didn’t know how Bucky convinced him to meet him at the one of the town’s few bars. But there he was, walking into the divey establishment. To be fair, it did feel cozy with all the wood and the hundreds of Christmas lights that probably had nothing to do with the holiday season.

Steve was grateful when he spotted Bucky at the bar, not wanting to be the first to arrive.

Before he made it to Bucky, he felt someone jump on his back in an involuntary piggyback.

“Who could this possibly be?” Steve joked when he heard the giggle in his ear.

They jumped down, and he turned to find Rebecca Barnes smiling up at him.

“Stevie! I haven’t seen you since last Christmas! What the fuck?”

Steve narrowed his eyes. “I believe Bucky and I have both invited you to New York multiple times.”

“I know. I know. It’s just hard getting enough days off of work to make the trip from San Francisco worth it.”

“I hear ya,” Steve said as he pulled her in for a proper hug.

They both made their way to Bucky and ordered some drinks.

Bucky and Steve had both lived in New York City after college.

Steve had gone to SAIC in Chicago for art school. Bucky had gone to Columbia for engineering.

They both hated the 4 years where they were apart. Bucky told Steve that he would love New York City and convinced him to move into a place in Brooklyn together after college graduation.

Bucky enjoyed going home to their small town. It didn’t hold the bad memories for him like it did for Steve. It was all healthy nostalgia and a place of comfort to him. He had been popular, a jock. Even though he was smart and nice to everyone, he was a golden boy at their high school.

Why Bucky ever befriended him was still a mystery to Steve.

Steve’s high school experience was rather different. His puberty was delayed. He was short and scrawny. He preferred the arts over sports. He was on the shyer side. All of these things mixed together apparently made him an easy target for the bullies. Not even his friendship with Bucky Barnes could save him.

It hadn’t usually happened in front of Bucky. And if it did, he stopped it countless times. But no matter how hard he tried, Bucky couldn’t put a stop to the bullying completely nor could he be Steve’s full-time body guard.

That time was past Steve now. 

But he still hated coming “home.” Besides his mom, there was nothing left for him in this stupid town. The only people he stayed in contact with from that time were Bucky and Rebecca, and he lived with Bucky now.

“We’re doing tequila shots!” Rebecca cried out.

“Dear God, Becs. Calm down,” Bucky groaned.

“Nope! The three of us haven’t been together in forever. We must get properly wasted. Tis the law.”

Bucky gave Steve a look and just shrugged with a smile. It wasn’t like they had to work tomorrow. It was Christmas Eve and they were technically both on vacation for the holidays for the whole week.

An hour later, Steve was happily buzzed. Rebecca was talking to friends she had kept in touch with after high school. Steve and Bucky kept to themselves. Every so often someone would come over and say hi to Bucky.

No one said hi to Steve.

He couldn’t figure out if it was because they didn’t care to or because they legitimately didn’t recognize him. 

Steve was a different person since high school. He finally had his growth spurt during his freshman year of college, now standing at 6’1. And it seemed his body decided to actually hold a few pounds instead of keeping his frame stick thin. On top of that, Steve started taking his health to a new level. Bucky would tease him that he looked more like he was a Big 10 football player than an art student. The beard probably didn’t help his past peers from recognizing him either.

Bucky was in the middle of telling Steve about his most recent date when the bells chimed, signaling a new person entering the bar.

Steve did a double take when he instantly recognized her.

He swore his heart dropped to his stomach.

Bucky caught his friends expression and how he was staring over his shoulder. He quickly turned around to see what Steve was gawking at.

“Oh, Jesus,” Bucky muttered under his breath.

Y/F/N Y/L/N.

Steve would never forget her name, even with his passionate efforts to forget all of high school.

There was a cry of cheers from a group of girls at her arrival. Steve recognized them as her friends from back in the day. They were some of the few people that hadn’t harassed him. They seemed to pity him…just like she had.

Y/N looked amazing.

She stood out for multiple reasons. The first being her height. But Steve noticed she wasn’t slouching like she had in high school, always trying to make herself appear smaller and getting down to everyone else’s level. Now her shoulders were back and her head was held high. Then he noticed the heeled booties. She had never even considered wearing heels when she was in high school. Now she wore them proudly.

The second reason was her clothes. They were far too stylish for their small, close-minded town. But she didn’t seem to notice the second glances or the judgmental looks.

The final reason was because she was beautiful. At least, Steve had always thought so. Turned out, even after 10 years, Steve’s heart still beat a little faster when he saw her.

“You’re staring,” Bucky pointed out.

Steve cleared his throat and forced himself to look away from Y/N as she hugged all of her friends and had a beaming smile.

“Shut up,” he muttered as he took a big gulp of his drink.

“Why don’t you go say hi?” Bucky asked with a mischievous smirk.

“As if she’d even remember me…” Steve mumbled.

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that.”

Bucky didn’t push him more and kept talking. 

But Steve was thrust back into memories he hadn’t repressed for quite some time. But seeing Y/N just thrust them to the forefront of his mind.

———————

Steve was struggling to put all his sketches back in his folder as he rushed through the halls. There were just a few finishing touches that needed to be made on one of them when the bell rang. Now he was going to be late to his next class.

He was about to turn the corner when someone slammed his books and folders out of his grasp. His jaw dropped as he saw dozens of his loose sketches go flying around the hall.

He looked up to see his assailant.

Brock Rumlow.

Next to him was his best friend, Jack Rollins, and a few of the other guys on the football team.

Steve ignored them and crouched down to pick up the papers, taking the higher ground for once. He wasn’t in the mood and he didn’t want to get another tardy. Nor did he want to get another detention for fighting.  

But Brock wasn’t letting him go so easily. He crouched down and picked up a drawing. It just happened to be one of Bucky. Steve had asked him to sit for him a couple of weekends to practice his portrait drawing skills.

“Fucking Christ! You really are in love with him. I don’t understand why Barnes lets your gay ass hang out with him,” Brock growled before ripping the drawing into pieces.

Then he picked up another one, it was of a woman. But just her lips and down to her clavicle. Steve prayed Brock wouldn’t recognize who it was based off of. He should, if his crush on Y/N was as strong as he pretended it was. In Brock’s mind, she belonged to him despite her never reciprocating the feelings.

Steve didn’t want that one to get ripped up.

He lunged forward, trying to grab it from Brock’s grasp.

This was exactly what Brock wanted. He picked on people he knew he could beat to make himself feel strong.

Before Steve could even tackle Brock to the ground, he pushed Steve to the ground so hard that Steve’s head slammed back onto the hard tile, even blinding his vision for a moment. 

“Is that a fucking joke, Rogers?” Brock laughed at him

Then he reached for Steve’s collar and pulled him onto his feet again.

“You really think you could even land a hit on me?” Brock whispered. He raised his hand to hit him, most likely in the gut. Brock seemed to like watching Steve keel over in pain.

“Brock!” A voice screamed from behind Steve. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

Steve stopped breathing when he recognized the voice.

Y/N.

“What?” Brock asked innocently and immediately let Steve go.

“I saw what you did,” Y/N accused, making sure to put herself between Steve and him.

“He was asking for it,” Brock shrugged. “He was walking to class, asshole.” She glared at him. “Just because your shit got rocked on the football field last game doesn’t mean you can just take out your embarrassment and anger on another person.”

“Whatever,” Brock rolled his eyes and then walked away with his friends. But he gave Steve a final glare that said, ‘You’re lucky this time.’

Y/N finally turned to look at Steve. “Are you OK? I saw how hard he shoved you.”

“I-I’m fine,” Steve stuttered.

“Are you sure? Maybe you should go to the nurse. I really think you could have a concussion.”

But Steve just shook his head.

Y/N sighed but didn’t continue arguing. Instead, she started helping him pick up all his papers.

“You’re really good at drawing,” she said as she looked at a portrait of his mom before handing it to him.

Steve blushed. “Thanks.”

The bell interrupted them.

“Shit,” Steve cursed under his breath. “I’m gonna be late again.”

“What class are you going to?” She asked.

“Math.”

She bit her lip. “With Foster?”

He nodded.

“I’ll walk you there.”

Before he could protest, she grabbed one of his folders, the one with all of the drawings and started walking towards Mr. Foster’s classroom.

The class had already started when they walked in.

Steve’s cheeks blushed once again as all eyes in the classroom went to him and Y/N.

“Y/N, what brings you here?” Mr. Foster asked pleasantly instead of reprimanding Steve for being late once again.

“I ran into Steve in the hallway – literally. I made a mess of his papers and was just helping him pick them up.”

Steve watched as she gave him a shy smile and played up her guilt.

“Well, that was nice of you,” Mr. Foster said.

Steve went to his seat before he could remind his teacher that he wasn’t on time. He looked up at the doorway to give Y/N a thankful look, but she had already disappeared and the door was slowly closing.

And that wasn’t the last time she saved him from bullies.

The next time was a month or so later. It wasn’t Brock that time. He’d learned not to pick on people while Y/N was present. He knew he’d never gain her affections that way.

This time it was one of his lackeys.

“Hey, Rogers? Can’t find any clothes that fit you properly?”

Steve ignored him.

“Have you tried looking in the little boys section? Maybe try Babies R Us!”

That didn’t make Steve turn around. What made him turn around was the sound of someone being shoved into the lockers.

Steve whipped around, fully expecting Bucky to be his savior.

Instead it was Y/N, who had her forearm crammed against his bully’s throat. Y/N was towering over him. She was taller than most of the boys in their school. But somehow no one picked on her for it.

“What the hell?” The kid said, struggling to say words with the pressure on his throat.

“I hear you pick on him again and I’ll make sure the whole school sees me kick you in the dick,” she told him.

Steve was stunned, convincing himself he was imagining all of it. 

But the kid nodded his head.

Y/N knew none of the guys would ever hit a girl. Even if they wanted to, she was taller and probably stronger than most of them. So she used that privilege to her advantage.

She let him go. A group of her girlfriends laughed at the bully as she returned to them. Before she disappeared down the hall, she gave Steve a small, reassuring smile.

Steve wondered if she felt the same way about being tall as he felt about being short. Maybe that’s why she felt the need to defend him.

But Y/N’s attention toward him didn’t stop there.

Steve wouldn’t consider them friends. But Y/N did acknowledge him at school quite frequently. If she managed to meet his gaze, she’d give him a little smile and maybe a wave.

When Bucky caught on, Steve waited for him to tease him about it, since Bucky could tell Steve’s crush immediately. But he gave Steve his space and they never really fully talked about it. It was just known from then on. 

————

Steve’s mind raced through all his memories like flashes. But then it seemed to settle on the last time he ever talked to Y/N.

————

It was the night of prom.

But Steve wasn’t there.

Bucky begged him to tag along with him and his date. But Steve knew Dot would not be fond of that, despite her forcing a smile and nodding when Bucky recommended it.

So Steve decided to go to a coffee shop. It was one of the few places he liked in their stupid town. It was open late and had plenty of space. Every once in awhile, he’d go there to just sketch or read. It was just an excuse to get out of the house and go somewhere.

Now he sat at in his usual corner that had good lighting and a bigger table, which was good for drawing.

Steve was listening to music, drinking coffee, and sketching away. 

But for some reason, a new patron coming in made him look up.

He did a double take when he recognized Y/N.

She walked in and looked a bit like a tomboy. She was wearing boyfriend jeans, a graphic tee, a baseball hat, and a zip-up with the hoodie pulled up. Yet Steve recognized her immediately.

He tried not to stare, but definitely wasn’t successful. He watched as she ordered a latte and two chocolate chip cookies.

Why wasn’t she at prom?

She turned and her eyes were going around the coffee shop, trying to find a table she wanted. That was when she spotted Steve.

With her latte and cookies in hand, she slowly made her way to Steve.

“Hey,” she said quietly with a smile, as if not to disturb the few other customers. 

“Hi,” he responded.

For the first time, he didn’t feel ridiculously nervous talking to her.

“Do you mind if I sit for a bit?” She asked.

Steve was shocked.

“You can say no. I won’t be offended,” she laughed.

“N-No, of course. Please, sit.”

She smiled and sat down.

“Shouldn’t you…uhh…be at prom?” Steve asked shyly.

Y/N let out a breathy laugh. “Well… no one asked me.”

Steve’s brow furrowed. That seemed impossible. “That can’t be true.”

She rolled her eyes will a smile. “Think about it, Steve. Yeah, I have some guy friends I could’ve gone with…but they all have girlfriends.” She took a sip of her latte. “It’s fine. I don’t really like dances. I only really like the whole dressing up part.”

Then she looked down at her tomboy outfit and started laughing. “Not that you would know by how I’m dressed right now. I look like a little boy.”

Steve smiled. “No, you don’t. You always look beautiful.”

Y/N sat up straighter, completely taken by surprised from his compliment. Steve shifted in his seat and dipped his head. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable…”

“You didn’t make me uncomfortable,” she replied with a grin.

He let out a sigh.

“So, why aren’t you at prom?” She countered.

“Ummm…doubt anyone would’ve said yes if I had asked,” he mumbled.

Y/N squinted at him.

“What?” Steve asked.

“You do realize that you’re like the sweetest guy in our grade, right? I know so many girls who didn’t get asked that would’ve loved to have gone. And they would’ve been more than happy to have gone with you, too.”

Steve blushed. “Whatever you say.”

Y/N then looked around them shyly. “Do you mind if I just stay here and read my book? I won’t bother you. You can just keep drawing.” Then she smiled at him. “Again… you can say no and I won’t be offended.”

“No, no, no,” Steve quickly said. Then he winced. “I mean, ‘no, I’m not going to tell you no.’ Not ‘no to your offer.’”

Y/N smirked at his fumbling.

So the two of them sat together in a comfortable silence. Y/N read her book and Steve continued his drawing.

He wanted to ask her a million things. He wanted to get to know her. The real her, not the the person everyone at school thought she was. But this – this whole just appreciating each other’s quiet presence was nice too. Steve didn’t know how to explain it, but it made him think it was more meaningful than asking her a million questions.

At one point, she pushed her plate toward him, silently offering him her other cookie.

That was the last time Steve talked to her. 

He saw her at graduation, but they were never close enough for any sort of interaction. She was surrounded by her friends and family. He was just with his mom and the Barnes family.

————

And that was it. 

They both went off to college and Steve never saw her again.

Until tonight.

The bar got a bit more crowded. But Bucky, Rebecca, and Steve stayed in their little area. Every so often, Rebecca and Bucky would get pulled into other groups of old friends, but they’d always find their way back. Steve didn’t mind.

It was towards the end of the night when Steve went to the bar to get another round of drinks for them. He was very happily buzzed. The miserable feeling of being back in his childhood town was just a bit weaker – for the time being.

“I don’t know why I expected you to come over and say hi. You always were so shy.” A voice said beside him.

Steve quickly turned to find Y/N leaning on the bar waiting for his attention.

“Hi,” was all he managed to blurt out.

“Hi,” she laughed. “I gotta be honest: I almost didn’t recognize you.”

Her eyes went up and down, taking in his tall frame. She used to tower over him. Now, even with her heels on, he was just a tad bit taller than him.

He chuckled awkwardly, never knowing what to say when people noted how much he’d physically changed.

“Can I make up for it by buying you a drink?”

She smirked and nodded. “You may.”

They chatted for a bit, friendly banter. Before Steve could use Rebecca and Bucky’s drinks as an excuse to leave the conversation, Becca practically came skipping over to take them away and return to her brother. She gave Steve a look that said, ‘Don’t you dare try to leave this conversation, idiot.’

“So what are you doing now? Where do you even live?” She asked Steve.

“New York. I’m an artist,” he decided to keep it generic.

“No way. I live in New York, too.”

Steve paused. “No shit? I’m in Brooklyn – Williamsburg, actually.”

“Ahh… Well, that would explain why we’ve never run into each other. I’m in Nolita.”

“So trendy,” Steve teased. “Though, I’m not surprised.” Then he gestured towards her outfit.

She acted offended. “And what is that supposed to mean?”

“You were always stylish. Nolita suits you. It’s a compliment, I promise. What do you do for work?”

She hesitated for a second. “I’m a stylist.”

“No shit,” Steve said in awe. “Like celebrities or…?”

“Yeah, a lot of celebrities, actually. They’re pretty much all of my clientele.”

“I’m sure you’ve got some crazy stories,” he pointed out.

She laughed and shrugged.

“You seeing anyone?” Steve asked then. “In New York, I mean.”

It didn’t feel awkward or forced, just like it was the natural next step in their conversation.

Y/N winced slightly and sighed. She didn’t look him in the eye. “Being a tall, successful, and independent woman doesn’t exactly have men lining up in New York City…”

Before Steve could say anything, Y/N laughed. “It’s like prom all over again,” she joked. 

But he wasn’t laughing exactly. “Well then, I think the same thing I did that night at the coffee shop.”

She tilted her head. “And what’s that?”

“Men are fucking idiots. All of them.”

She threw her head back and laughed. “Even you?”

“Oh, me more than any of them.”

“What! Why would you say that?”

Then his laughter died down and he took a sip of his drink, a little liquid courage. “Because…if I had known no one had asked you to prom, I would’ve taken you – in a fucking heartbeat.”

“You didn’t know,” she pointed out in a sigh. “But you did know so many other girls who didn’t have dates.”

He shook his head. “They weren’t who I wanted to go with.”

Her smile dropped ever so slightly, catching on to what he was trying to say.

Y/N cleared her throat. “We probably shouldn’t live in the past. It’s not like it would do us any good.”

“But I’m the same person,” Steve challenged suddenly.

She looked at him, waiting for him to say he was joking. “You’ve probably changed more than anyone we went to high school. I mean, look at you!”

Y/N grabbed her coat and Steve stood up without thinking and helped her back into it. The gesture seemed to catch her off guard.

Then they realized how close they were standing to each other because of it.

“You didn’t ask me,” Steve said quietly.

Her eyes flickered from his eyes down to his lips without meaning to. “Ask you what?”

“If I was seeing anyone…”

She sort of scoffed at the idea. “I’m sure you’re seeing many people, Steve.”

“That’s not even remotely accurate,” he chuckled lowly.

Her eyes softened then. “You’re one of the good guys, Steve Rogers. And sadly, the older I get, the more I realize how few of you there really are in the world.”

Steve didn’t know how to respond to that.

A beat passed between them. It was filled with opportunity. Make a move, a part of his head was screaming at him. No, don’t be an idiot, was the other part.

And then the moment passed just as quickly as it arrived. And Steve missed his chance.

“Well, it was really nice seeing you again,” she told him.

“You too, Y/N.” He blinked. “Here, let me get you an car home.”

“Oh, you don’t–”

“If I hadn’t been drinking, I’d drive you myself,” he cut her off before she could actually argue.

5 minutes later, he was closing the passenger door for her and he watched the car drive away.

When he walked back into the bar, Bucky and Rebecca were giving him a sympathetic look. They already knew he let her go without trying. Because they knew him better than he knew himself sometimes.

“Don’t,” he warned them both.

“I think…we should do another round of tequila shots!” Rebecca announced.

“Fine. But then we’re going home before I have to carry you back home over my shoulder,” Bucky warned his little sister.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever,” she shooed as she went to the bar.

Steve was quiet for the rest of the night, thinking about everything Y/N and him had said to each other that night.

---------------

Steve woke up the next morning with the worst headache of his life. That’s what he got for drinking the world’s cheapest alcohol.

When he grabbed his phone from the nightstand, he noticed he had a text from a number that wasn’t in his phonebook.

He opened it to read: “Barnes told me to text you so you didn’t ‘make the same mistake twice.’”

Steve swore his heart stopped. There was no one else it could be .

With a smile, he texted back, “I’m gonna beat that punk up later.”

To his surprise, she texted back right away. “So, are you saying he was wrong to give me your number?”

Steve thought for a moment. “No, he was definitely right to do so. Apparently, I’m incapable of doing anything for myself.” He hesitated. Enough of being safe and careful. Might as well go for it. “As soon as I closed that car door, I regretted not asking for your number.”

“You know...we don’t have to just be people from each other’s past.”

“What are you doing for New Year’s Eve?”

“Nothing.”

Steve smiled. “Well, that’s not the case anymore. I’ll see you in NYC, Y/N.”

-----------------

So, a lot of the reader was basically me in high school and a lot of it was not. I’ll let you guys figure that out for yourself. 

Let me know what you thought of it!

Oh the title was inspired by “Seventeen” by Sharon Van Etten. 

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x tall!reader #tall reader insert #steve rogers x tall!fem!reader #steve rogers x tall girl #steve rogers high school au #marvel high school au #steve rogers fluff #steve rogers angst #steve rogers one shot #steve rogers reader insert #I used to be seventeen #I used to be seventeen - one shot #marvel tall reader insert

[heyyylittlemo]

You have worked hard this week, have a cookie 🤲🏼🍪😁😘

Awhhhah that made me day you’re so sweet :,D like H o n e s t l y I have had a rough week and I’ve been feeling down I can’t believe the niceness 🥺 like how did u k n o w

Real quick I need 2 rant abt—(feel free to ignore) some things on my noggin.

**Trigger warning** : Talk ahead of bigots not understanding Trans people, lgbt+ and other races

Idek where to start but...over the past few months I’ve made an amazing friend. At first, it being the south and her being a part of a culture that is known to be anti-lgbt and knowing how others around her talked I always assumed she was homophobic??

I know I shouldn’t assume, but here it’s a gamble. There’s actually a lot of racism, a lot of homophobia,etc. I’ll get into it later

So when she wasn’t and turned out to be really open we had some amazing talks and she was like the only person at my work who knew about my sexual orientation. Helped me feel welcome. Released a lot of tension.

One night it came to her when speaking to me that she should stop trying on/off with her ex(he’s controlling/cheats) and that she deserved better to be happy not with someone who caused her this damage. So she was so grateful for my advice.

But now she’s moving out of state to be with him...and soon my other friend(who was like a grandpa to me—this is very important because I don’t have a prominent connection with either of my grandads) is saying in a few months he plans to leave the country and am just assuming there’s going to be a lot of changes and that I’m going to be feeling so alone :,D not to mention, I feel so backstabbed that’s after all the advice and how much she seemed to be looking forward to being without him, she’s turned against her word and her best interest and went back anyway...I mean, I just want the best for her and she made the descision to move so fast I can’t see it ending well :(

And then in the midst of this there’s this coworker who I looked up to as a sort of mother figure type and she’s saying these homophobic things about how she doesn’t like this one singer cause he’s “gay” and mocking gay behavior all of a sudden :,D I thought she was going to be open minded but...I was wrong.

Then yesterday I hear that there’s been a shooting in a nearby town. Maybe 30-40 minutes away. Someone killed an innocent black man here. And now they’ve shut that whole town down and supposedly there’s a lot of KKK members around there and also in this other town... like legit there was a hotline for it back in the 90s that would spam call people living there. My mom grew up there and she said she saw a mass of them walking the streets a few times when she was little and that her neighbor was the dragon aka head of it. Now I’m paranoid that more shooting will happen and that there’s a lot of them who’ve passed on their ignorance over the years and that there’s even more than before they’re just hiding. I’m just thinking damn it could be anyone 🤮

To top it all off, I overheard a table who was having a bday party(which I honestly think it’s a weird conversation topic at a birthday party) but talking about trans people. At first they were complaining about having to wear masks (go figure). Anyways, This woman was like “it’s so fucked this world we have so many men turning into women now. They get their d***k and chop it up and sew it into this fake thing and it looks so w r o n g.” After that I just had to carry myself away cuz it pissed me off so bad like wtf there were children at that table too I feel really bad because they’ll probably grow up thinking that shit too 😔 and it ruined my night because I was already having to work a double shift to make up for this one dude who hasn’t been showing up.

So yeah...it’s a mess and it’s complicated. I don’t think I’ve ever in my life had such a pile of ignorance and intolerance come by all at once and so horrible too. I hate how so many people just can’t be decent human beings, how hard is it to not be homophobic, racist, or transphobic?? Any why now is it getting worse? What’s going on? Has anyone else experienced this lately? It’s crazy 😢

Anyways, sorry for my always long ass posts but I just needed to get this off my brain. Everyone have a safe day and remember to love others. Thanks @seiji-amasawa for the pick me up!! I really needed it ☺️

[eddiesasspbrak]

“About what you said back there...”

Prompt inspired by one line of dialogue. Warning for homophobic language and bullying.

Also on AO3

Eddie is targeted by bullies and Richie steps in to save him. 

3k+ words. Oneshot

Once again, Eddie Kaspbrak found himself cornered by a group of bullies who were determined to ruin his day. Not that his day was going great to begin with. He’d forgotten his homework on his desk in his room. For every single class. Endlessly he was lectured about not having his homework, class after class, hour after hour. He’d stayed up late the night before to get it all done too so he was exhausted. He’d dozed off in algebra only to have Bill throw at eraser at his head before the teacher saw.

He’d decided to spend his lunch napping in the only place he was likely not to be disturbed. There was a corner under the bleachers, not far from where the smokers hid, where it was shadowed from the sun. It was the perfect dark place when the weather was nice. That’s where Eddie went, hoping to get a bit of sleep before his afternoon classes. Of course, as soon as he settled into the corner against the cold chain-link fence, he was met with unwanted company.

“Well, look who it is.”

Eddie’s eyes shot open at the sound of the voice. He knew this voice. Luke, football player, stereotypical bully rich guy jock. Pathetic really. He acted like he’d stepped out of an actual teen movie from the 80s and it was almost embarrassing to watch. Small guys like Eddie were just the kind of person he enjoyed pushing around. His goons, Rob and Steve, are standing behind him, smiling like assholes.

“Afternoon fellas. What can I do for you?” Eddie hoped they just called him a loser and moved along. He really didn’t have the energy for this right now.

“You’re in our spot.” Luke said, crossing his arms over his chest, trying to look menacing.

Ok, that was bullshit. Eddie and his friends napped there all the time and never once saw them around. They didn’t smoke either so it’s not like they were hanging out farther down and saw them. Eddie wondered why they’d chosen to claim this spot, which had been theirs for so long. He had to really weigh whether or not he wanted to argue with them and potentially get his ass kicked in the process. If he did get beat up, his mom would come get him and that would be great, but then she’d take him to the hospital so not so great. Not worth the trouble.

“Sorry. Wasn’t aware this was your spot.” He said flatly, standing up and grabbing his bag off the ground. “Guess I’ll go fuck myself. Assholes.” He said under his breath. They were really not meant to hear that.

“What was that?” Luke asked, taking a step closer.

“Nothing.” Eddie said quickly, trying to walk past them.

Before he made it, Rob and Steve stepped in his path. Eddie stopped in his tracks before crashing into them and sighed. He really didn’t need this. Why couldn’t he just bite his tongue and walk away? He didn’t tell any of his friends where he was going either. One of the dumbest choices he’d made that day.

“Sounded like he called us a mean name.” Steve said, backing Eddie back against the fence.

“That’s what I heard.” Rob agreed.

“Look, I just wanted a place to nap. I’ll leave, you can have the spot and I won’t come back.” Eddie said, putting his hands up.

Rob pulled his backpack from his fingers and threw it into the dirt a few feet away. Steve’s hand came down heavy on his shoulder, making him jump and also cringe because his hands were probably filthy. Luke came to stand between them, in front of Eddie.

“I think you owe us an apology.” Luke said.

“I’m sorry.” Eddie really hated them, but he also didn’t want to get hurt.

Luke twisted his fist in the front of Eddie’s shirt and lifted him up with it, the cold metal of the fence scraping against his exposed lower back. Eddie prayed to whoever was listening that they’d just threaten him, scare him, and then leave him alone. He kept his mouth shut, hoping he wouldn’t antagonize them any further.

“I didn’t hear you.” Luke said, close to this face.

“I-I’m sorry.” Eddie gripped Luke’s wrist tightly as he dangled there. God, why did he have to be so little?

“I don’t think I believe you.”

Eddie knew that he wasn’t going to get out of this anytime soon. Why did he even get out of bed this morning? He could have played sick and his mom would have immediately called the school and let him stay home to rest. He wondered what they were going to do to him, going to make him do. In the past they’d taped him to a wall, his friends finding him later and carefully ripping all the tape off to get him down. They’d made him eat a sandwich they first rubbed in the dirt. It was disgusting and gritty and he for sure puked afterward with Bill rubbing his back. He’d been socked in the stomach more times then he could count, given wedgies that literally ripped his underwear and locked in lockers at least once a week.

He was ready to accept his fate when he heard what, at the moment, was the equivalent of an angel’s choir. His name, loud and clear and enough to take the attention off of Eddie for a second.

“Eddie. You ok?” Richie asked as he approached.

“Hey, Rich. I’m not doing so great.” He said with a half smile.

“I can see why. You’ve got some trash stuck to the front of your shirt.”

Luke released Eddie, dropping him into the dirt. Eddie landed on his butt, groaning at the sharp pain that radiated up his spine. The attention of the three bullies was now on Richie.

“What the fuck did you say, Tozier?” Luke asked, angry.

“I think I said you’re human garbage. Though the human part may be a bit of a stretch.” Richie grinned, his hands in his pockets, relaxed like they were having a casual conversation.

“You think you’re funny?” Luke left Eddie on the ground and walked toward Richie with Steve at his side. Rob stayed behind with Eddie, ready to beat him at Luke’s signal.

Richie shrugged. “Yea. I do. So does Eddie.”

Eddie’s smile immediately fell when Rob looked down at him. Of course, he was smiling at Richie’s words. His self-appointed protector always made him laugh and smile, especially when he was coming to his defense and putting down assholes. The fact that he was in love with him was only part of it.

“I was just going to kick your boyfriend’s ass, but I guess I’ll have to kick yours too.” Luke said, grabbing one side of Richie’s open button up shirt.

“He’s not my boyfriend.” Eddie chimed in, on reflex.

“You’re not laying a hand on him.” Richie said at the same time.

“Yea, how are you going to stop me?”

“I’d fight until I’m bloody and dying on the street before I’d let you hurt him.” Richie said defiantly, leaning in close to Luke’s face. “You’re the human equivalent of dog shit. Pathetic. You think you’re some big shot football star who’s going places. You’re going to live in this town the rest of your life, a future gas station attendant waiting to happen.”

“I’m going to pound your ass into the ground, Tozier.”

Richie’s face split into a crooked grin. “Kinky.” He said just before Luke’s fist collided with the side of his face.

Richie lurched to the side with the force, falling to the ground. Luke followed him down and landed another punch along his jaw. Eddie tried to stand and go to his friend, but Rob put a hand to his chest and shoved him back down against the fence. He could only watch in horror as Richie was punch for a third time, his hands on Luke’s shoulders trying to push him off.

As if answering Eddie’s prayers, the cheerleading coach, who’d been walking nearby, heard him yell out and saw what was unfolding under the bleachers. She called out to them, told them to stop as she made her way to opening a few feet away. Steve grabbed Luke by the back of his shirt and pulled him up.

“We gotta go, man.” He said. Cliché as ever.

Luke stood and looked down at Richie. “Fucking fag.” He said before motioning for his friends to follow him as they rushed off.

Richie flipped them off, remaining on the ground. Eddie scrambled on his hands and knees over to Richie, not caring that he was getting dirty in the process. His glasses had fallen off, his left eye already swelling, a cut along his cheekbone. His nose was bleeding though didn’t seem to be broken and his lip was split. Eddie didn’t think three of four hits could do so much damage. He grabbed Richie’s glasses, glad to find they hadn’t been broken, and handed them to him.

“Shit, Richie. Are you alright?” Eddie asked, instinctively reaching to touch his face but stopping himself.

“I feel like my head is about to split open but otherwise ok.” Richie laughed before wincing, the act of smiling pulling at his split lip.

The cheerleading coach had gone after the three bullies and Eddie hoped that she saw their faces. Eddie stood, offering a hand to Richie to help him to his feet. His face was a bloody mess and he needed to put ice on his eye to help with the swelling. Eddie looked like he was close to crying and Richie didn’t want him to get to that point.

“I’m ok, Eds. Chicks like scars, right?” He asked with a small smile, careful of his lip this time.

“I think they’re more impressed when you actually fight back.” Eddie said, sniffling.

Richie’s smile widened as he reached out and ruffled Eddie’s hair. “I could probably use some of your expert care, Dr. K. Want to fix me up?”

Eddie rolled his eyes, shoving his hand away and grabbing his backpack, which was now filthy. “Anyone at your house right now?”

“No. Why? Are you planning to skip?”

“Might as well. I don’t feel like being here anyway.”

“Picking fights with bullies, skipping class, what’s happened to my innocent little spaghetti?”

“Shut the fuck up. Do you want me to fix you up or not?”

Richie wiped the blood dripping from his nose with the back of his hand and followed after Eddie. His house wasn’t far by bike and they were there in less than ten minutes, Richie unlocking the door for them. He called out into the empty house, just to be sure that both of his parents were out. He got no response, so they ventured in.

“Where is your first aid kit?” Eddie asked, going straight to the kitchen.

“Uh…bathroom maybe?” Richie guessed.

He headed to the bathroom while Eddie rifled through the freezer. Richie was sure he’d seen a first aid kit somewhere before, he just wasn’t sure where his mom kept it. Looking under the sink, he found a small white box with a red cross on it near the very back.

“How do you not have an icepack in here?” Eddie called from the kitchen.

“I don’t think we’ve ever really used one.” Richie said, entering the room behind him with the first aid kit.

“This will have to do.” Eddie said, grabbing a small bag of frozen vegetable and turning to face Richie. His eyes fell to the small box in Richie’s hand. “You’re kidding right? That’s your first aid kit? It’s tiny. There’s no way it’s going to have everything we need.”

“I mean, don’t we just need some bandages?”

Eddie rolled his eyes and scoffed. “You don’t know anything.” He grabbed a dish towel from a drawer and wet the corner of it in the sink before instructing Richie to sit at the kitchen table.

Eddie pulled a chair up in front of Richie and sat, opening the small box and sighing at the contents. Inside was a box of bandages, a roll of gauze, and thankfully some antiseptic spray. Richie took his glasses off and set them on the table, pressing the bag of frozen veggies to this left eye. Eddie set to work using the wet towel to clean the dirt and drying blood from his face. Richie could barely see him, but he could still make out the way his tongue poked out of his mouth while he focused.

When he was satisfied that everything was clean enough, Eddie grabbed the antiseptic spray and sprayed it onto a clean corner of the towel, not wanting to spray it that close to Richie’s eye. He dabbed the cut on his cheek with the towel and Richie hissed at the sting.

“Don’t be such a baby.” Eddie said softly.

“Your bedside manner is terrible, Dr. K.” Richie responded with a small smile.

“Shut up.” Eddie said as he very lightly dabbed Richie’s lip where it was split. He couldn’t do much for it, but he could disinfect it. He tried not to focus too much on the fact that he was touching Richie’s lips. They’d never had any problem being close to one another, Richie had for sure kissed his cheeks before. It was no wonder everyone thought they were dating. Eddie denied it whenever it was brought up because it wasn’t true, but that didn’t mean he didn’t wish it were. Richie didn’t even bother denying it anymore.

“Alright, it’s not perfect. It would have been better if you’d had some butterfly closures, but this Flintstones bandage will have to do instead.” Eddie said, sticking the bandage to his cheek.

“Feels better already.” Richie slumped back against his chair, still holding the veggie bag to his eye.

Eddie began cleaning up, standing to throw the garbage away. Richie watched the blurry blob of color that was Eddie as he moved around the room.

“They didn’t hurt you, right?” Richie asked.

“No. They didn’t get the chance before you showed up.” Eddie said, keeping his back to Richie as he washed his hands at the sink.

“Good.”

“You shouldn’t have intervened. You wouldn’t have gotten hurt if you’d stayed out of it.”

“Better me than you.”

Eddie’s cheeks warmed at that and he was suddenly glad that Richie still had his glasses off. Of course he was glad that Richie had shown up when he did, but he couldn’t help but feel responsible for his injuries. He only said what he did in his quest to keep Eddie safe. He loved him for it, but he wanted to keep him safe too.

“Hey…about what you said back there…” Eddie said, finally turning back to look at him.

“Which part?” Richie grinned. “I say so much it’s hard for me to keep track. They don’t call me Trashmouth for nothing.”

“When you said…you would fight until you were dying in the street to protect me. Did you mean that?”

Richie’s smile grew soft, trembled a bit at the corners of his mouth like he was struggling to hold it in place. “Yea. I meant it.”

“Why? Why do you always put my safety above your own?”

“I’d die if anything happened to you, so it’s better to die making sure nothing does.”

Eddie didn’t know what to say to that. He’d never felt so loved as he did in that moment and he wanted nothing more than to let him know how he felt. Emotion welled up in his chest, up his throat and to his lips before he could even think about it.

“Don’t be stupid. I’d die if anything happened to you too.” He said, tears in his eyes. “I love you, Richie.”

Richie’s smile returned. “I know, Eds. I love you too.” He set the bag of veggies aside and slid his glasses onto his face. As soon as he could see, he was met with the sight of Eddie, covering his mouth with one hand, tears spilling down his cheeks, his other hand tangled in the bottom of his shirt.

He opened his arms, signaling without words for the other boy to come to him. Eddie crossed the room quickly, collapsing against Richie and wrapping his arms around his shoulders in a hug. Richie’s arms came down around his middle as he pulled him down onto his lap.

“How about, next time we fight together and neither of us has to die?” Richie suggested.

Eddie nodded against his shoulder. “We need a better first aid kit though.” He sniffled.

Richie breathed out a laugh. “Sure thing, Dr. K.”

Eddie leaned back and cupped Richie’s face with one hand, his thumb bumping the Flintstones bandage. He was so stupidly perfect, even with his face all banged up and bruised. Pushing his glasses up, Eddie planted a kiss to the side of his eye where the bruise was starting to form.

“I told you, scars are hot.” Richie grinned.

“It’s a bruise. Not a scar. Dumbass.”

“Just as effective.”

“Can I kiss you?”

Richie’s mouth snapped shut, the dopey grin gone. “Yea. Yes. Absolutely.”

“What about your lip?” Eddie asked, nudging the corner of Richie’s mouth with his thumb near where it was split.

“It’s fine. Kisses are supposed to make injuries better, right?”

Eddie smile and rolled his eyes, leaning down to connect their mouths. The kiss was innocent, soft, just testing the waters. Eddie let his hands rest against Richie’s chest, the other’s hands holding tight to his hips, keeping him on his lap. Not that Eddie was planning to go anywhere any time soon. Feeling more comfortable now, they decided to experiment, their lips moving together. Richie winced, making Eddie pull away.

“Did that hurt?” Eddie asked, eyeing his lip.

“Worth it.” Richie said with a grin, pulling Eddie back in for a hug.

#Reddie #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #It #it (2017) #it (2019) #Ro writes

[serendipitous-magic]

Question Game - AKA Oversharing Hour

I was tagged by @the-angry-pixie​! And I’m a chronic oversharer, so this was fun. I’ll put most of it under a read more line because there’s a LOT.

1. Do you prefer writing with a black pen or blue pen? 

Black. Dunno why.

2. Would you prefer to live in the country or city? 

City city city city city city city city. I’m already going fucking batshit as it is, trapped in suburbia. I want to be able to actually do things, anything. Anything other than just being around the house and / or work. (And I felt like this before the pandemic started.) If you live in the city you can walk out your door and be somewhere else within like 5 minutes. A city park, a cafe, a train/subway, a local attraction, a museum, an artist’s booth, an outdoor market, etc. etc. 

Living in suburbia is like, well, to go literally anywhere you have to get into your car first and drive like 10 minutes minimum to get out of the neighborhood, and then if you want to go anywhere that’s not the grocery store you have to drive 20 minutes to get to another area of town, and then once you get there that’s the only place you can be without getting into your car again and getting a nice shot of anxiety from having to drive in traffic and have aggressive drivers roar up on your ass because you’re going 5mph above the speed limit and they want to be going 15mph above, and god help you if you have to merge, and oh by the way this is your only option to get around because public transit doesn’t really exist in any useful way in Big Suburbia, and nothing in within walking distance of your house except like 2 playgrounds and maybe one (1) gas station. (I hate it here lmao)

If I was trapped in the country I’d probably be chill with it for about a week, and enjoy the break, and the on day 8 I’d snap and go on a murdering spree out of stir-craziness.

3. If you could learn a new skill what would it be? 

I want to learn German and eventually be fluent in it. But since I’ve already started trying to learn and I don’t know if that counts, I’ll say cinematography. As in the actual working of the camera and lighting and all that. I can dream up some pretty striking images but actually getting the camera to do the settings needed to capture them is another story entirely.

4. Do you drink your tea/coffee with sugar? 

Nope. I drink coffee and tea both, and I don’t put any kind of sweetener in either of them. I used to put a shitton of sugar in my coffee and honey in my tea, and then I had some mild eating disorder struggles in college and I never got back in the habit of putting stuff in my hot drinks after that. It just tastes wrong now, after being used to plain black coffee.

5. What was your favourite book as a child? 

Either the Harry Potter series or The Hobbit. My grandma would take care of me a lot when I was really little because my parents both worked full time to support us, and every single time I was at her house she’d sit us down at the dining room table and read something to me. Not Junie B. Jones or anything, either, but real, big, thick books. I loved the shit out of Harry Potter and The Hobbit; I would request them repeatedly. We pretty much went back and forth; we’d read Harry Potter, and then The Hobbit, and then when a new Harry Potter book came out we’d read that, and then The Hobbit again, and so on and so forth.

6. Do you prefer baths or showers? 

Showers. I love baths, they’re magical, but ain’t nobody got time for that unless it’s a special occasion. I got too much shit to do to spend an hour lying in the bathtub.

7. If you could be a mythical creature, which one would it be? 

Vampire. Purely on the basis that if I was immortal maybe I’d finally have time to get my to-do list done and accomplish things. I’d miss the sunlight though.

8. Paper or electronic books? 

Paper. Here’s the thing, I really want to enjoy ebooks, but they just don’t hold my attention at all. Maybe I’m too conditioned by the internet to have a short attention span when I’m looking at a screen, idk.

9. What is your favourite item of clothing? 

I have a dark gray hoodie from the Seattle Aquarium from when I went on a road trip across America with my BFF a few years ago. It’s still my absolute favorite thing. I also enjoy my hiking boots a lot. (I wear them all the time, really they should just be called “everyday boots” haha)

10. Do you like your name or would you like to change it?

I like my name and I would also like to start going by something different. Probably just because I’m a restless soul and I feel the best (and least trapped) when I’m on the move or when things are changing. The second I get somewhere I want to be somewhere else. That’s just how I am. Gwen is a cool name (I’ve personally met maybe 3 people in my whole life with the same name, face-to-face), but there’s a lot attached to that nickname that I don’t necessarily want to carry with me when I eventually escape my hometown and start down a new path.

11. Who is a mentor to you? 

A friend and former professor whom I usually refer to online as Producer Man. He’s a producer (as you may have guessed) who kind of took me under his wing after I was in one of his film classes in college. We work together on film projects now and he’s teaching me bit-by-bit (usually by way of long, rambling, tangential stories / lectures) about the industry. He’s a really good guy. Like, he for sure has a case of Old White Guy sometimes, but his heart is absolutely in the right place. “He’s a little confused, but he’s got the spirit.” He’s always leaving $10 tips at coffee places and working himself to the bone to get his students connected to jobs and internships that will help them with their careers. 

12. Would you like to be famous and if so, what for? 

Yes, my stories. Actually, “famous” is not the right word. It’s just that fame is so tightly associated with success in our society. I want to be successful. Whether I’m widely known or not is pretty inconsequential to me. I want to make stories and I want them to have an impact. Books, film, etc. It’s about as simple as that.

13. Are you a restless sleeper? 

Oh yeah. I have trouble  sleeping as much as I should because I usually kind of jerk awake in the morning with this vague feeling that I forgot something or that I’m late for something. Also I stay up later than I should because I’m a night owl, and yet I like being up early because early mornings are great. And usually if I dream at all it’s something kind of stressful, like I dream that I forgot something important or did something wrong. I’m a Stressed Bean. 

14. Do you consider yourself a romantic person? 

I think so, yeah. I’m pretty obsessed with the idea of romance (I mean look at my OTPs), but heteronormativity got me fucked up enough that I’m bad at actually navigating real romantic feelings or relationships because society never prepared me for The Gay.

15. Which element best represents you? 

Fire, probably.

16. Who do you want to be closer to? 

My mom. We fight a lot and there tends to be a lot of tension between us. It’s a long complicated story. It boils down to, she really hurt me when I came out as not-straight at 15 and she lost all of my trust and even though she’s working on being less homophobic we’re still kind of trying to repair that divide seven years later.

17. Do you miss someone at the moment? 

Dude, I miss everyone. I’m an introvert and I’d love to be at a big party right now. I miss socialization. (As does everyone.) 

18. Tell us about an early childhood memory. 

The first time I experienced deja vu, I was about eehhh 6? And I legitimately believed, for several years of my life, that I had future-predicting abilities. Like, supernatural-level future-predicting abilities. Because I didn’t really know what deja vu was, so I thought, every time it happened, that I had already ~seen~ that moment in my dreams or something. 🤣

19. What is the strangest thing you have eaten? 

Hm. (My immature ass brain yells “DICK.” No, brain. Those were dark heteronormative times. Also, grow up.) 

Probably some of the sushi in Seattle. I actually love sushi, it’s just that when it has full-on legs and eyeballs I start getting a little squeamish. I like the rolls and the kind where there’s some fish meat laid out on a nice little bed of rice, that’s delicious. But when they brought out the whole shrimp with legs still attached, I was like “How in the (redacted) am I going to chew / swallow that.”

20. What are you most thankful for? 

That I happened to be living with family when this pandemic hit. I was supposed to move out (and across the country, actually) as of... like 4 days ago, as it happens. That was the plan. Plane ticket was gonna be booked for 7/15/20. Obviously, things didn’t quite work out that way, because of the pandemic and a few other reasons. But I can’t imagine if I had been in an apartment living with roommates, or in an apartment on my own struggling to get by, when this happened. A lot of people couldn’t pay rent and lost their homes. I was very, very lucky to be where I was, when I was, and very lucky that I have family who let me stay in their house pretty much indefinitely while this clusterfuck of a year happens.

21. Do you like spicy food? 

Yes! I looooove spicy thai food especially. I miss the massaman curry from a local Thai place so much 😭

22. Have you ever met someone famous? 

Um. Maybe? I met Veronica Roth once at an author talk in the library where I work, although it was before I worked there. And I met some guy from New Zealand who’s famous for his sword fighting skills because my dad does sword fighting stuff. Don’t remember his name though.

23. Do you keep a diary or journal? 

Yep. I have to write down everything or I forget. (I often say I have the memory of a goldfish.) Also, I have this compulsion to record and preserve my experiences in life, because I feel like our time on Earth is so fleeting and if I don’t write down what’s important to me, I’ll forget it and lose it.

24. Do you prefer to use a pen or a pencil? 

Pen. Pencil gets smudged.

25. What is your star sign? 

Scorpio, which is ironic because they’re supposed to be ~hyper sexual~ I guess, and I’m like gray-ace or something in that zone.

26. Do you like your cereal soggy or crunchy? 

Crunchy. Who eats soggy cereal? Are you okay? Do you need help? This is an intervention. 

27. What would you want your legacy to be? 

My stories. Life and sentience, as we experience it, is made up of just that: experience. And I read somewhere that, on some level, the human brain doesn’t differentiate that much between real life experiences and fictional experiences. I think that’s true. If you read or watch or hear the right story, it can really touch you and change the way you see life, or even change the way you live life. Stories have an incredible amount of power, both in individual people’s lives and in larger society. A huge amount of power. I want to be able to give people experiences that will Enrich Their Lives (do I sound like a lifestyle coach yet? 🤦🏼‍♀️), but also stories that actively do good in society. Positive representation, body positivity/neutrality, diversity, healthy relationships (Hollywood has a real problem with that). Hope. It’s the best thing I can think to give society, and storytelling is what I love to do.

28. Do you like reading, what was the last book you read? 

I love reading. I wish I did it more. Part of my problem is that I get caught up in the hectic Rat Race of modern society and I never feel like I have time to sit down with a book for hours. Another problem of mine is that I start too many things at once, meaning I currently have like 5-10 (I lost count) books that I started reading, and I want to finish all of them, which means no progress ever gets done on any of them.

I last finished The Goldfinch, and I am currently working on The Secret History, Good Omens, Dune, a book my dad wrote, Directing Actors, Shot by Shot, The Way of Kings and I forget what else.

29. How do you show someone you love them? 

Physical affection, acts of service, words of affirmation, quality time, and gifts, in that order. If I’m close to someone, whether romantically or not, I want all the affection. And I’m kind of dying in quarantine. 

30. Do you like ice in your drinks? 

Depends. I usually don’t put any in, because it’s just gonna water down the drink and get in the way of drinking it (you know when the ice attacks your face?), but I don’t really mind ice in my drinks.

31. What are you afraid of? 

Helplessness. I Have Control Issues. ✌️ Also stagnation.

32. What is your favourite scent? 

Amber. Or any scent that’s kind of autumn-y. You know what I mean. Some other examples include dryer sheets, wood smoke, cigarette smoke (my big sister used to smoke a long long time ago, and although I never saw her do it, I still associate the scent with her), pine resin, rain, that Mahogany Woods scent from Bath and Bodyworks.

33. Do you address older people by their name or surname? 

If they introduce themselves as Pam I call them Pam. If they introduce themselves as Mr. Brown I call them Mr. Brown.

34. If money was not a factor, how would you live your life? 

 If “money is not a factor” means I have an infinite amount of money to spend as I wish, then: buy land, build film studio complex on land, found company, hire fellow creatives, make movies.

If “money is not a factor” just means that I don’t have to work 40 hours a week to afford rent, then: move to Chicago, rent a nice studio apartment, write stories, maybe work 15 hours a week at a used bookstore or coffee shop to get me out of the house and socialize. Go to museums, go to the park, walk along Lake Michigan, go to gay bars, ride the train, brave the Illinois winters, own a cat, paint, play guitar. Build my actual career on writing / storytelling. Probably also do some filmmaking.

Alternatively: buy an RV (not like an American Trailer Park shitty RV, I’m talking the NOICE ones), buy good film equipment, be a freelancer, live in RV driving around to wherever the next filming location is. Life is a road trip and I’m doing what I love. Writing, storytelling, filmmaking. My home would travel with me. Writing in cafes; roadside attractions; early mornings on the road with coffee in the cup holder as the sun comes up; being able to go anywhere to film; always experiencing something new.

35. Do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean? 

I’ve lived in a landlocked state my whole life, so I guess swimming pools. And, listen, I CANNOT get water in my mouth at the beach without wondering exactly how many kids have peed (or worse) in that water. (I know that’s a thing with pools too, but pools get cleaned.)

36. What would you do if you found £50 on the ground? 

Wonder what some poor European is doing in America right now. But if it was $50, I’d probably yell “DID ANYONE DROP THIS?” and then take it if no one speaks up.

37. Have you ever seen a shooting star? 

A few times, yeah.

38. What is the one thing you would want to teach your children? 

Grades are not the end-all-be-all. Skip some homework assignments to spend time with friends. Skip class sometimes. I’m serious. If you make school your top priority, even over your own personal life, you will come away with good grades and a lot of regret and missed opportunities. Learning is HELLA important, and very very little of it happens inside a school building. Get a 15 hour weekend or after-school job in high school, befriend your coworkers, and have fun with it. Use your paychecks however you want. Join a school club - one that you’re actually interested in. Do stupid shit. Light your textbooks on fire after graduation or go to the 24 hour Wendy’s at 2am with your friends or kiss that person you met at summer camp or sleep on the porch because it’s too hot to sleep inside. Be smart and safe, but follow your whims. If you let yourself fall into routine, apathy will poison you.

39. If you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it? 

I already have a couple small ones, but the one I want next is a four-leaf clover. Don’t know where. Maybe my right inner wrist or maybe an ankle. Or like behind my ear. Luck has saved me so many times. (See above, with how I happened to be living with family when COVID hit.)

40. What can you hear now? 

Swamp cooler downstairs, the clock ticking in my office, cars outside, people moving around the house. I’m surprised the neighbor kids aren’t shrieking their absolute heads off as per the usual. 

41. Where do you feel the safest? 

When I’m alone and unobserved. 

42. What is the one thing you want to overcome/conquer? 

TMI warning, but I absolutely despise public bathrooms. How am I expected to pee when there’s somebody sitting like three (3) feet away, with only a partial wall between us, hearing everything that’s going on? My fight or flight response simply will not allow it. It’s too awkward and therefore Not Safe. Either that public restroom has to be empty except for me, or it has to be so loud and bustling that ain’t nobody hearing anything. Anything in-between and I’m in hell.

43. If you could travel back to any era, what would it be? 

The ‘80s. Let’s be honest, even that far back makes my life (as a woman, and as a gay person) hella difficult. But, consider this: it’s the ‘80s. Furthermore, consider this: a part-time job might have actually supported me and paid rent back then 😱 Holy fucking shit. Sign me up. I just wouldn’t want to go any further than than like 1980, because again: lesbian. Being a woman in the past = even harder than it is today, being gay in the past = even harder than it is today, being a gay woman in the past = oh no.

44. What is your most used emoji? 

In order of descending frequency:

😂🙄😊😁🤦🏼‍♀️👀😬🌈🤷🏼‍♀️😙

45. Describe yourself using one word. 

Creative

46. What do you regret the most?

Wasting my entire teenage experience. (See #38.) I did quite literally nothing with my life except homework for like 18 years. If I had taken even a tenth as much time for myself as I did for school, I would be so much farther along as a person today.

47. Last movie you saw? 

In the theaters? ........ uh. Shit, I don’t actually remember. It’s been like 5 months. (As it has for everyone.) But the last movie I watched was Lights Out, because I’ve been watching the director’s youtube channel. You could tell it was low-budget and that the director was still kind of finding his stride, but it had a lot of heart behind it and the creators clearly gave a fuck, which made it enjoyable. I am firmly in the camp of “not everything has to be a Magnum Opus or have a multi-billion dollar budget to be a good movie.” If I engaged with it and got some sort of emotional experience out of it, and if it had a good message, I consider it a good movie.

48. Last tv show you watched? 

I don’t usually watch a whole lot of TV shows (who has the time?) but I think the last thing I watched was either The Witcher or that new Unsolved Mysteries miniseries on Netflix. Oh and I was watching Dead to Me because I just love Linda Cardellini’s face and I want to wrap Judy up in a blanket and cuddle the shit out of her and protect her from all things 🥺 My precious beautiful unstable sweet murder baby.

49. Invent a word and it’s meaning. 

Apapanic. It’s where you’re so stressed about things that half of your brain is panicking but the other half is so overwhelmed that it circled all the way back around to being calm to the point of apathy, so you just kind of sit there like

#about me #tag game #except as usual i'm not gonna tag people because I don't have to social energy to ask people to do things #sorry i know that's kind of cheating #if you wanna overshare just say I tagged you lol #personal #tmi

[bekahdoesnerdshit]

anxiety boredom and mischief for raini, excitement sorrow panic and fright for ayen, impatience confusion disgust for cog!!

Raini

Anxiety: Anxious Raini is an irritated Raini, because like I’ve said before it is So much easier to be angry than to feel any other negative emotion. I also think an anxious Raini is a Raini who’s looking at a problem she can’t directly fix, because otherwise she’s not going to bother getting anxious when she can instead focus on getting results. Anxious Raini is fussing with the tassels on her robe, pacing, tugging at the end of her braid, glaring at people with 80% more heat than normal, just generally a ball of nervous energy. Times Raini has been anxious! Meeting Ecstasy’s parents and figuring out what that means! When we killed the goddess of magic and Raini realized she was suddenly a defenseless sack of hit points! End of list.  Boredom: Bored Raini is a Problem. Like, Raini is generally a problem? But bored Raini is a problem (With a capital P and that rhymes with T and that stands for Trouble, I guess?). She gets huffy. Arms crossed, head falling back or to the side to show her Displeasure, rolled eyes, the whole nine yards. Bored because there’s nothing to do? Solution: find something to do! Probably, unfortunately, get off. Because she’s Nasty. Bored because someone is boring her? Make sure they Know that they are Boring, and trust that with enough sighing and raised, unimpressed eyebrows, they’ll fuck off. Mischief: Raini doesn’t get mischievous very often! Which means when she’s in a Mood, it’s an Event. I think there’s a lot of biting the inside of her cheek to hide a grin, a lot of glancing at any co-conspirator she may have, a lot of acting too casual, just to attract a little bit of suspicion and keep things fun. Did she and Yocheved fantasy spray paint a statue to Amaunator last night even though Lent told them not to? Of course not. Did she use a 9th level spell to Polymorph Zize to be about four inches taller, so she would bump her head on things every so often? Preposterous! That certainly doesn’t sound like something Raini would do. You can’t prove shit. 

Ayen

Excitement: Excited Ayen is a bouncy Ayen! She’s walking alongside and then in front of whoever she’s with, hands clasped behind her back, ponytail swishing behind her, bouncing on the balls of her feet as she grins and looks back with wide, bright eyes! The world is in front of them! It’s here and it’s alive and their’s to explore! Why waste time dragging your feet? She’s already pretty energetic as is, but when she gets herself worked up like this? It’s best to just let her tire herself out and try to keep up in the meantime.  Sorrow: For Ayen, the most concrete experience she has with sorrow is the subtle, aching thing that is her grief for a family she never got to know. It’s not the same as knowing and losing them, of course, but sometimes she feels like she grieves them in the same way. And she’s going to find them! Of course she is! It’s just...it might take a while. And what if she doesn’t? And what if they don’t want her when she does? It isn’t often, but I think Ayen gets wrapped up in that spiral every so often, especially when she’s taking watches alone and just has time to Think. I think her sorrow looks like droopy ears, chin on her knees, eyes cast downward. Managing a small smile for anyone who looks over at her, because that’s what they’re expecting, but letting it slip away again when they turn around. She’s quiet, for a while, until she gathers herself enough to shake off the funk and remind herself who the fuck she is.  Panic: While short lived, panic is definitely something Ayen has experienced. See: when she went to fight those spiders in the middle of the night, missed, and then saw like three more pop up. Uh oh! I think there’s a fair amount of wordless yelling (along with swearing, but the question did specify ‘nonverbal’ so), fumbling with whatever she’s holding (a weapon, a glass bottle she wasn’t supposed to touch, etc.), and tripping over herself to put distance between herself and whatever’s scared her. Basically, I think she loses any semblance of grace she may have had, and turns into the living embodiment of “Oh shit FUCK ass BALLS uh shit fuck TITS” Fright: I’m going to differentiate “fright” from “panic” by approaching this one as a longer term sort of thing. I think growing up in the Shadowfell, it takes a lot to rattle Ayen in regards to traditional horror. Like, when you spent most of your life looking out your window to see the sentient shadow goop that makes up your backyard eating unlucky mortal travelers on the reg, anything else is kinda....eh? I think she also suffers from “haha this is an Adventure everything is fun and games!” disease, also called “not having the life experience to realize sometimes things are just actually fucked up and it’s not gonna turn out okay by default”. None of which answers the question, but is still true. I think if something really, deeply scared her, she would just shake. Her hands, her voice, everything. Ears pinned back against her head, eyes wide and darting around for something she can claim as “safe” to recenter herself, slow, careful steps away from the source of her fear as opposed to the scrambling from the previous question. But, of course, I’m sure it won’t ever come to this in game!! 

Cog

Impatience: Not a very common Cog mood! She’s no saint, but if anything she’s usually the one slowing people down. And honestly, even if she’s not, she’s not generally in enough of a rush ever that it matters. I can think of a handful of times where she’s been impatient with someone, and both of those times were pretty different. As a rule, though, she defaults to this sort of tight lipped, tense, closed mouth smile, with varying degrees of warmth depending on how Frustrated she is. She crosses her arms, raises her eyebrows, looks between the person she’s waiting on and where they need to go or the door (but in a way she thinks is subtle, and probably isn’t), but generally just. Resigns herself to wait it out until the other person is done rambling or taking their sweet time doing whatever it is they’re doing. The only exception? When the party thought Ace might be double crossing them, and had spent So long dithering about whether to go back to New Alexandria to confront him. Cog had enough; she put her foot down and said she was going with or without the party so that she could prove his innocence. If they wanted to keep her alive, they could come too.  Confusion: While the other two may be things that Cog has little to no experience with, she’s got confusion in the bag. Not to flex on anybody? But we’re confused twenty! four! seven!! Absolutely nothing sexier than a woman who’s always just a little bit out of it!!! Confused Cog is smiling politely, but she’s very obviously lost. She’s fidgeting with her hands somewhere low around her stomach, looking up at the people around her and kinda. Half reaching out every so often? Looking for a place to cut in to ask for clarification? Oh you’re still talking? No worries! I’ll wait. :) I hate to be mean to Cog, because I do love her, but also once she’s figured out she’s not getting caught up, it’s just elevator music up there. Someone -probably Wol- will get her caught up later, she’s sure! :)) Disgust: Cog has been outright disgusted once in her LIFE and it was when the party went to meet the Guardians -a group of gods that protect Lafaroh in exchange for occasional offerings- in the swamp outside the town. On their way to the Guardian’s meeting place, the party was attacked by some fucked up, homophobic scorpions which poisoned the Fuck out of Ace. The Guardians could fix him, but they did this by producing this alien? Bug? Thing?? That went inside Ace to clean the poison out. Nasty. Disgusting. Vile I hate it. Cog very nearly threw up I think, and dropped her first (and for a long time, only!) f-bomb of the campaign. It was a eyes wide, face pale, hand pressed to mouth, too horrified to look away kind of disgust. I think it was mostly luck that she didn’t actually throw up, because she has a weak enough stomach (read: low enough con) that it’s probably about 50/50. Similarly, in like the next session, Cog was the one to find the body of the headmaster of the Academy, and all she could manage was to tear her eyes away long enough to nod silently at the party, fighting rising bile the whole time.

#rainivere #amnesia campaign #creepy campaign #ayen morwraek #cog #wasteland campaign #answered #mine #sam says: ayen! lore! now!!!! and he's RIGHT #also? ask me about the homophobic scorpions if you want! it's pretty good Lore #spaghettoland

[meshkol]

Twitter Threads (or That One Time Tony Dialled It Up to Eleven)

Summary: Social media is hard and full of trolls, and Tony has poor impulse control.

Notes: I hate this so much. Less cracky than I wanted it, because I suck at writing humour. Fill K-3 for the Tony Stark Bingo 2019: Gossip Press. Unbeta'd as per usual. Any relation to existing twitter handles is entirely coincidental.

Warnings: Social Media, Twitter, Homophobic Language, Sexist Language, Ableist Language, Internet, Trolls, Protective Tony Stark, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Goes On A Rampage

No one can say that Tony’s ever had good impulse control, especially about people he loves.

@1234ideclareathumbwar posted: I donno what it is about dr strange but he must suck dick like a pro if hes got iron man whipped god knows theres nothing attractive about him except those dick suckin lips #drstrange #ironman #wtfisstarkthinking

 @100percentDONE-xxx replied: yeah its not like he can give a decent handjob ffs must me the lips or maybe hes just tight every1 knows stark loves a tight whole hes prolly cheating neway poor cripple

 @itsawrapandimreadytoparty replied: Probably just lays there and thinks about the wizard gods just to get that $$$...I’d think of England even for a nymphomaniac drug-addicted sugar daddy too, tbh.

 @BlessYouThor-ness replied: still can’t believe he chose strange over THOR like everyone can see the chemistry between them and tony is such a bottom he’d take thor’s cock so well fuck yes

 @they-did-the-thing777 replied: is it just me or does strange look like an alien maybe there’s no magic at all just aliens and he’s got a tentacle dick and stark just wants to mark off another box on his worlds-biggest-slut checklist #tonystarkispathetic

 @snowflakes_makeme_lol replied: hes just fkn ugly i s2g stark id spread 4 but strange??? that bitch be ugly asf n not worth gettin my dk wet prolly get aids

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: You guys are the pinnacle of our evolution and I am in awe of your genuine kindness and polite generosity (and grammar). Wow, I can’t believe Stephen Strange saved all of your jerkass lives TWICE for this shit and you know what? Everyone knows I’M the cocksucker in this relationship, dumbfucks.

 @kiki_blow_this_popsicle_stand replied: HOLY SHIT LMAO

“What are you doing?”

He doesn’t bother looking up from his tablet, backing away from that thread because he has no interest in seeing the replies, and hunting for the next war he can wage. “Destressing,” he replies gleefully, clicking on a thread that mentions Pepper. He can feel Rhodey behind him – and, what’s more, he can feel the disapproval seeping out of his pores too now that he’s peeking over Tony’s shoulder – but he’s on a roll, and fuck impulse control when he can sass and bitch on twitter. Some people just need to be removed from the genetic pool of the human race and not be allowed to procreate, honestly.

Somewhere in bumbfuck-nowhere, Fury is having a coronary and Stephen is rolling his eyes so hard they’re permanently lodged in his cranium.

@rudethatyoureallamatwink posted: Does anyone else think that Pepper Potts only got the job at Stark because she’s got awesome legs and a great twat and Tony Stark wanted to stick his dick in? #idfuckher #pepperpotts #starkindustries #idfuckhimtootbh #tonystark

 @MyNameIsGoFuckYourself replied: lol ur gross shes like 35 or smth but wvr u want crusty ol lose pussy u do u bro #oldchickgross #getbotox

 @shredderinmymetal3-14 replied: @MyNameIsGoFuckYourself lmao wtf?? He started fucking her when she was like twenty or something so she was still nice and tight back then. I mean I’d still fuck her right now cause she’s one hot cougar and I bet she’s learned a thing or two from the Slut Extraordinaire. And anyway, how tf do you know what her cunt’s like?? The only hole you’ve fucked is your mom.

 @queeen-bee-says-hi replied: Wow, you guys are pigs. Pepper Potts is a strong, independent, beautiful woman who is worth a thousand of all you, and your mothers would be ashamed of you all.

 @gags_are_the_best_fight_me_bitch replied: @queeen-bee-says-hi hey look theres the feminazi if you want i can replace that stick up your pussy with my dick you know you need it ill fuck you real good show you what a real mans like

 @truthisanillusion replied: I’ll fuck @queeen-bee-says-hi AND @OfficialPotts_CEO at the same time fucking feminazi cunts, god knows you bitches would be grateful for my prick in your gaping lesbian pussies

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: Wow. So. Uh.

1. That’s revolting and my AI just delivered the IPs of @gags_are_the_best_fight_me and @truthisanillusion to the authorities for premeditated violence, rape, and hate crimes. You’re welcome, and feel free to send a cash donation to the charity of your choice for my thoughtfulness. I’d recommend something for women’s or LGBTQ+ rights, and I’ll match it with a multiplier of 1000x.

2. @queeen-bee-says-hi, good for you, and I can see from your profile that you’re a student. Consider your crops watered and your schooling paid for, all the way to your twelfth PhD if you want it.

3. @OfficialPotts_CEO can and will murder you with her pinky nail. I’ve taken on Thanos and I’d rather go ten rounds with him than piss her off. THAT’S why she’s CEO, not because of her admittedly awesome legs.

4. I hate this hellsite. If I buy it, can I kill it?? Rhodey says “technically” so I’m gonna look into that now.

 @i_stan_one_legend_named_virginia_p_potts replied: IRON MANNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!! DEFEND THE QUEEN!!!!!!!!!!! #PEPPERPOTTS4PRESIDENT

 @iaminlovewithcapandimunashamed replied: lmfao incels be fkd when #ironman comes to town

 @truthisanillusion replied: Hey @YouKnowWhoIAm No one trusts you or likes you, you fake ass super “hero” taking it up the ass like a faggot stfu and die already, kthxbye

 @queeen-bee-says-hi replied: whAT OH MY GOD THAT IS NOT NECESSARY

 @OfficialPotts_CEO replied: Tony, stop picking fights and threatening to buy twitter or I’ll ground you. And just accept the gift, @queeen-bee-says-hi - after all, he’s already done it.

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: Shut up Pepper, you aren’t the boss of me.

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: And jokes on you @truthisanillusion because I’m already dead inside come at me bitch I’ll be the one in the multi-billion-dollar suit of armor surrounded by Avengers

 @OfficialPotts_CEO replied: Actually, I am. Don’t make me take away your toys. Or call @Sorcerer_Supreme_With_A_Scalpel. He’s on speed-dial, sweetheart, and he likes me better than you.

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: Rude.

 @Sorcerer_Surpreme_With_A_Scalpel replied: The last time you threatened someone, your house got blown up. Please refrain from egging on internet trolls or I’ll dump you for Rhodes for my own sanity.

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: ALSO RUDE.

“You know, I’m not even remotely bi-curious and I would totally tap that,” Rhodey says absently, though his lips are quirking into a smirk.

Tony rolls his eyes. “Hands off, you little shit, or I’ll tweet about that one time in MIT when you ate that—”

“Fuck you.”

“Been there, done that,” Tony quips cheerfully. “Not remotely bi-curious my ass—”

“You know what’s better than picking fights with twelve-year-olds on twitter? Kicking your ass right here. You come at me, Stank.”

Tony opens his mouth to reply but then gasps, already losing himself in another thread after sending a middle finger emoji into the last one.

@mwahahaha-666 posted: You guys can wax poetry about Tony Stark all you want, but screw that basic-ass rich boy - everyone knows Doctor Strange is the smokin’ hot one. #takemenow #mybodyisready #drstrange

 @ukulele_jedi_master replied: PREACH!!! stark may be loaded but stephen is the one that looks like a prada model giMME THAT MAGICAL DICK

 @xxx-foreverfit-xxx replied: Fuck both of you. I just wanna be a fly on the wall when they’re fucking each other...or better yet, DIRECT them on how to ruin each other #ironstrange #otp

 @highpercentageofuselessnessachieved replied: i wonder if he can clone himself like can u imagine?? being fucked from all ends by #drstrange cock?? what i wouldn’t give to be tony stark omfg i don’t even want the money just the hard dickin from that fine piece of ass

 @its_a_fact_that_captain_america_has_a_big_dick replied: He’s got Iron Man wrapped around his little finger so he must have the biggest dick and the know-how to use it properly. Yes pls and thank you very much, I’ll take that monster dick pronto.

 @TGBYHN_4_LYFE replied: dude i tell u what i would do what @xxx-foreverfit-xxx said: sit in the corner w a ridign crop in 9’’ stilettos rubbin myself while directing them 2 do what i want...make em touch n stroke n suck n bite n fuck each other til they cant walk anymore n then cuddle w them n stroke their hair

 @catcatcatcat-cat replied: I would give my college education, my life, my cow, and my internet access away for the rest of my life for a sex tape

 @xxx-foreverfit-xxx replied: @TGBYHN_4_LYFE omfg fuCK YES CAN YOU IMAGINE listening to them moan as they lost themselves in each oter, so fucking desperate to get off that they’re begging you to let them cum even as they try their hardest to obey, covered in precum and sweat and hot as fuck

 @bigfoot_is_nessie1987 replied: I s2g the amount of fanfiction I write about those two alone should have me committed but I literally can’t stop the two of them are so fucking hot together that it should be illegal god bless Iron Man and Dr Strange and their sexy, sexy chemistry and sexy, sexy bodies #killme

 @one-upon-a-time-in-asgard2 replied: They are the hottest couple in the history of the universe and so fucking pure I love them both so much also @bigfoot_is_nessie1987 I demand a link to your fics cuz I’m always looking for more ironstrange porn #otp #ironstrange

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: @Sorcerer_Supreme_With_A_Scalpel Hey, they think you have a big dick. Little do they know that they’re totally right and that you also have the added bonus of actually BEING a big dick too! #dontthreatentoleavemeforplatypus #orilltagyouinthirstposts #awesomethirstposts #stephenhasabigdick #andiloveit #goodshit

 @mwahahaha-666 replied: OH MY DUCKING GOD

 @its_a_fact_that_captain_america_has_a_big_dick replied: Well, I’d be mortified that Tony Stark is replying to this except Tony Stark is acTUALLY REPLYING TO THIS BLESS YOU IRON MAN

 @Sorcerer_Supreme_With_A_Scalpel replied: One of these days I’m going to murder you with your own bravado and not lose a night’s sleep over it. And fine, I won’t touch Rhodes...I’m sure Rogers is free anyway, and he’s always so polite when I visit.

 @bigfoot_is_nessie1987 replied: Please don’t read my fanfiction I will literally combust in embarrassment also I am dying over here in Copenhagen omfg

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: BRO CODE, DUDE. YOU’RE VIOLATING THE BRO CODE. I HATE YOU SO MUCH AND I WANT A DIVORCE.

 @catcatcatcat-cat replied: ...oh my god what does that mean you guys are MARRIED??!?! BLESS THE WIZARD GODS!!!!

 @Sorcerer_Supreme_With_A_Scalpel replied: Rhodes, I know you’re reading over his shoulder, so if you could please take away his phone now before he ends up on the cover of the Times...or breaks the internet. Again. Thank you in advance.

Tony reacts immediately, trying to make a break for it, but Rhodey’s already tackling him into the couch, a hundred and ninety pounds of lean muscle and pretty Class As. Tony hisses breathlessly, the wind knocked out of him, and he struggles valiantly to keep his hands on his tablet while Rhodey does his best to rip it away. He doesn’t have a very good position so he makes a hair-brained, split-second decision to throw his body weight to the side, making them both roll off the couch. Rhodey’s a jerk though, and manages to react fast enough so that Tony takes the brunt of the impact, and he can’t even help but groan in a mixture of mild pain and disappointment as he feels the tablet being removed from his lax fingers.

“Sucks to be you, Stank,” he says breathlessly, fingers flying over the keyboard, and Tony cranes his neck until he can read Rhodey’s reply (and on Tony’s fucking account what in the hell!):

@YouKnowWhoIAm replied: I think I broke your hot mess of a husband, Stephen. Come collect him before he murders me with his eyes or gets his hands on another electronic device. We’re in the lab.

Three seconds later, Stephen walks through a portal, looking oh-so-fucking-gorgeous in his battle robes, and wearing a scowl of irritation that bodes well for rough, mock-angry sex in the near future.

Tony grins unapologetically, and abandons the lure of social media in exchange for his pseudo husband.

It’s an easy choice.

Also read on ao3.

Feel free to prompt me things on my Bingo Card!

#tony stark #stephen strange #rhodey #james rhodes #pepper potts #ironstrange #social media #twitter #homophobic language #sexist language #ableist language #internet #trolls #protective tony stark #tony stark has a heart #tony goes on a rampage #rowan writes #tony stark bingo 2019 #tsb19 #this is utter shit

[zalk909192]

Victory + Love

AfuHiru Month - 20.08.19 - Act1

Day Four_ Victory and Love Rating_ Mature? But a light one. What’s in here?_ bad words, a lot of money, nyc, wall street, homophobia, long fic Ao3 here, folks (Prompt List) by Nene~

Hiruma had everything a man would ever want. Power, fame, money, women. Everything was at his feet. He was living the American dream to the fullest; he started in Texas when he won a scholarship for being the always winning quarterback of his football team. Then, in college was pretty much the same, but he preferred to continue with Economics in New Your instead to choose a sports career. He was brilliant and he started to work hard on Wall Street in a few years. The money came quickly, his name was on everyone's lips in the high society and every single rich boy and girl of New York City would have loved to have him like their broker. Hiruma lived in an attic on top of the W New York Downtown hotel, near to Wall Street but not too much. He loved his work, but sometimes he preferred to be apart from that world. He wasn't a fan of the mundane life of Wall Street. His hate for drugs and corruption was a big deterrent and his presence at parties were rare. That night the party was hosted by one of his client and Hiruma was the main attraction. Since his face wasn't often in public in the right context, everybody wanted to shake his hand or to flirt with him. And offer jobs, which he never accepted. After two hours of intense social activity, he escaped from the noisy crowds and went right out of the room, to breath some fresh hair on the terrace. He had a glass of whiskey and by the railing, only a woman in a long black dress and high heels was there too keep him company. She has a nice ass and her curves seemed to be better than usual in his eyes. Her blonde hair was gathered in a high tail and he could see her elegant neck. Well, maybe he could have tried to not leaving that place alone, after all.

« So? Is the party as boring for you as it is for me? »

The woman looked at him right over her shoulder with an amused smile, then she looked again in the night of New York with a little laugh. She shook her head.

« Then? Why here, all alone in this dim light? »

Hiruma was approaching her with a grin on his face and he was more convinced about, at least, the beauty of the woman.

« May I ask your name, milady? »

And then, he realized he made a mistake. The lady turned around and smiled showing in the light reflected in the glass of the terrace's windows. She was a he.

« I'm Afuro Terumi, dove. Am I like you expected me to be? »

Dove? Ah, he was wearing a white suit. That was a rhetoric question, Hiruma knew he couldn't help but be surprised. He was frozen on the spot, in fact, because that situation was totally absurd. It was absurd he thought about a man from a certain perspective. Insane. Illogical. And of course wrong on so many levels.

« Hiruma Yoichi, eh? They said you have more women than money, but that you prefer asses more than... well, you know far better than me. »

Afuro Terumi was only some inches from him and Hiruma started to panic a little. A man. Well, not only a man. A man in drag was suggesting...

« Maybe I can be useful in the same way. »

Hiruma just- couldn't- No. Never. Afuro moved a little for god-knows-what and Hiruma was himself again. He stepped back, trying to remain calm.

« I'm not a faggot. »

Afuro stopped instantly and raised an eyebrow.

« Excuse me, what did you just say? »

That was an accusation.

« I said I'm not like you. I mean. Flattered, but no thanks. I'm not a- »

If eyes could kill, Hiruma would have been already dead. Afuro took a step further and slapped him.

Hard.

On second thought, it wasn't a slap at all. It was a punch. A good one. So good he had the taste of his blood in his mouth. Afuro didn't like being insulted, not even by the newborn legend of Wall Street.

_

Afuro Terumi was born and trained to be perfect. His family was a strict one, he had a childhood full of responsibility and with too little time for himself. That's why, when their parents died in a plane crash, he was 23 and he was so awfully relieved he started to do everything he truly wanted unrestrained. In a moment he went from perfect future CEO of an old import-export company to the rich heir who didn't give a damn about rumors and scandals. He was openly gay, on Wednesdays he would wear pink, and by the way, in three years he had recreated the empire of his stinky old family in something completely different, but even more proficuous. He was a highly requested top model, he was CEO of a makeup company under his name, he was his own model for his line of lingering, and he anticipated the Supreme trend with the "Victory+Love" one, rich of special collaborations featuring world-famous artist and brands. It was time to make it grow more and they said that a good seller could sell whatever he asks him to, with the right motivation. And ho was the best broker in town? Hiruma Yoichi. That name sunk in Afuro's mind like a promise, the first time he heard it. After some research, he found out some peculiar things about the man he would like to hire. A lot of women but when he asked, only some of them told him that they had sex after leaving the party together. And both of them said that Hiruma would come only with anal sex. To Afuro, it was enough to know the real preference of Hiruma. It was so explicit that Afuro thought why someone should have sex with girls too. Because of course, Hiruma was gay in his eyes. Maybe he could even hire him and offer some benefits.

"I'm not a faggot" That words and Afuro was pissed already. Because if Hiruma wasn't a faggot, who else could be one?

The punch came from a fucking black belt in Taekwondo. Because a faggot could make you cry just like any other man. And in high heels, that faggot could make you bleed without a single flinch.

And still, the next day the same faggot could end your career on a whim.

But like the goddamn faggot he was, he didn't: he had a lot of ways to crush a homophobic homo like him.

#afuhiru #afuhirumonth2019 #afuro terumi / hiruma yoichi #afuro x hiruma #afuro terumi #hiruma yoichi #eyeshield 21 #inazuma eleven #fanfiction #long fic

[granvarones]

Louie: So where did you grow up?

Freddy: I was born in West Covina, California and was raised by both my parents in La Puente, California but when my parents divorced my mom moved to Phoenix, Arizona, which is where I spend most of my time now. We moved to a somewhat rural town that has primarily Black and Latinx populations where the white people live in the nice neighborhoods and the people of color lived in the "other neighborhoods." I almost never interacted with white people. My classmates were always people of color with a sprinkle of white people every now and then. However, growing up here was a living hell.

Louie: How so?

Freddy: The first time I was ever bullied was in 5th grade when someone wrote "FAG" in one of my notebooks and it just got worse from there. At that point in my life I knew I was gay but just tried not to think about it and I was also pretty religious so I tried to "pray the gay away.” It didn’t work (lol). 7th grade was the worst year of my life because I was physically, emotionally, and psychologically bullied every single day that resulted in me switching schools. There was not one day where someone wouldn't call me a “fag” or try to fight me because I was "looking at their dick". They would also call me a cocksucker which I never really understood why they called me that because they were just stating a fact. My mom got worried when I came home crying one day from basically being assaulted and we went to the principal and he did absolutely nothing. It was a really dark time for me because even my friends at the time would tell me, "Just come out already" and at that point I just was not ready.

Louie: How did you sustain yourself during that time?

Freddy: I've always used humor to deflect my feelings and emotions so I would just laugh because it was all I could do. In high school it got better but people still would call me a fag and other annoying ass terms. I also dated girls, which blows my mind now but it was the easiest way to deflect rumors. I came out to my friends as bisexual my junior year and my senior year of high school but when I got my first boyfriend and I came out as gay. My friends weren’t surprised but were happy I was living my truth. I came out to my mom October of 2015, which is pretty recent, and while it didn't damage our relationship she doesn’t acknowledge my queerness but it'll take time and I know she'll get there.

Louie: Who was the first person you told actually told?

Freddy: My senior year of high school when I had my first boyfriend. I was so in love with him and because of him I realized that I was gay. I had dated girls before but being with a boy was just so different. I loved this boy, truly, and because of that I wanted to come out and tell everyone I was with him because for once in my life I was happy. One of the most important people in my life is my Grandma on my dad’s side and I decided to tell her first. She did not react the way I expected her to. She told me I was a disappointment to the family and that my family had high hopes for me and now they were gone. She also told me to keep it a secret forever and to never ever tell anyone else. It hurt. It hurt a lot. I cried for a while and told myself I was not going to tell anyone else until I graduated college and had a career. I didn’t talk to my grandma for a while and talked to her for the first time a couple months ago. I do want to have a relationship with her again but every time I see her, her words echo in the back of my head, so it’s a work in progress.

A couple months later I came out to my little brother because one: He is one of the most important people in my life and two: I wanted him to know so I could hookup with guys easier in my room. I told him in the car when I picked him up from school and I remember being so nervous and feeling my heart beat so fast. So I tell him “I’m gay" and he just looked at me and said "Yeah, that’s cool, can we go eat?" I was in shock because it was big secret and he just like curved it completely. Later on he told me he loved me and I lowkey cried because it was the first time a family member had said that. I always look back at that moment because I feel like that’s what coming out should be, not a big deal because I would've reacted the same way if my brother came out to me as straight.

Louie: Did you have any Latino gay men to look up to when you were growing up?

Freddy: I had absolutely zero gay Latino men to look up to. No one is gay in my family except for yours truly. It wasn't until a couple years ago that I found out that I did have a gay cousin but he was kicked out of the family for being gay so he moved to Spain. He reached out to me in 2013 and we talked for a bit but at that time I didn't know he was gay. Unfortunately, he died of AIDS complications a couple months after. I still wish I could have gotten to know him better.

Oddly enough even though my mom is a cis-heterosexual woman, she took a part in developing my queer identity because I felt like she always knew and lowkey supported it. My mom is a very religious woman from El Salvador who fled her home country because it was going through a violent civil war. She came to the States and married my dad but they divorced after 7 years and she raised me as a single mother. Growing up, she always took me shopping and I always helped her pick her outfits and she would always ask me for my opinion. She would always sit me down after her long work shifts and gossiped about her coworkers which I lived for because Latinx chisme is the absolute best. I also remember she would always tell me "Los hombres no sirven para nada" which basically is "men ain’t shit" and would warn me to be watchful of men. Which is why I now have IMPECCABLE fashion (not really), a big ol chismoso, and have always been watchful of the men that try to enter my life.

Louie: What did you think we as a community need to do to survive the next four years?

Freddy: There is so much we need to do as a community to survive the next four years. First we need to talk about anti-blackness in the Latinx community and start by talking to our racist ass family members who are contributing to the problem. The fact that we stay silent when our Tia'sbe saying racist shit is a problem. Also acknowledging our privilege for those of us who are citizens of the United States and stand up for the rights of undocumented immigrants. The easiest thing to do is to stop referring to immigrants as illegal because it paints them as criminals which contributes to this rhetoric that immigrants are dangerous when they're just trying to escape from their home countries that in most cases the US has fucked up. I'm also going to need gay men to stop with this obsession with performing masculinity and femme shaming because its toxic as fuck. I fucking hate it when guys ask me if I'm masc or femme and I’m just like “the fuck???” What does that even mean? Also destigmatize HIV and stop othering those who are HIV+ because it’s dehumanizing as fuck. I’ve heard some pretty ignorant shit about HIV and it’s something that we need to work on. We need to stand up for Trans women of color because the LGB+ community be forgetting that T especially when they are out here dying with a presidential administration who doesn't give a fuck about people of color and even less about the LGBT+ community and even less about our trans siblings. I mention all these problems in our community because in order to survive an oppressive, fascist, racist, misogynistic, homophobic, transphobic, xenophobic government, we have to be able to dismantle these in our own communities so we can come together to resist combat and survive the Trump Administration. We literally cannot afford to be silent any longer. This country hates my existence but my existence is also resisting and I am absolutely proud of being a Queer Ecuadorian/Salvadoran man living in a country that despises me. To survive these next four years, we just need to keep living, keep resisting, keep protesting, keep dismantling systems of oppression, keep holding our government accountable, keep being unapologetically Latinx and of course keep being unapologetically queer as fuck.

Freddy Christian Bernardino, Phoenix, AZ

Interviewed and photographed by: Louie A. Ortiz-Fonseca

#thegranvarones #granvarones #queer #gay #latinx #latino #storytelling #portrait #phototgraphy #resist #familia #photojournalism #lgbtq

[captainjackfuckingbarakat-blog]

So I’m working on an Ian/Mickey fic, but refuse to post it, until I’ve got a rough draft completed. Now, I’m not very far in it right now, but with college right now, motivation dwindles. So, I thought I’d post a snippet (ok, not exactly a snippet, it’s a few thousand words long...), and hopefully get some feedback on it.

Enjoy!

Felicia’s hand was flung in front of her, the diamond on her finger glinting with the sunlight beaming through the window and reflecting off it. Ian dug into the depths of his memory, for any recollection of a boyfriend, but he found none. He’d known the fiery auburn haired girl for three years – their first meeting definitely left them a story to tell. Despite the length of their friendship, Ian could only remember Felicia single, even last night she’d been eagerly grinding against some guy. “Oi, don’t be thinking too hard there.” She spoke with a thick British accent; she’d only moved to the states three years ago, shortly before meeting Ian, and she did nothing to cover her origins.

           “You’re just telling me about this now!” Ian seized her left hand, eyes glazing over the rock that took up half of her finger. Felicia had been a mysterious woman from the beginning, and had no problem constantly throwing him for a loop – like the ex-boyfriend she’d left behind with their infant daughter when she was 18.

           “He only proposed this morning. Sorry I decided to have celebratory sex with my fiancé to tell your sorry ass.” Felicia yanked back her hand, flashing one more adoring smile at her ring finger before shoving it into the pocket of her black romper. “Oh come on, I’ve told you about Mickey, dark and handsome. Haven’t I?” Felicia threw a gob smacked hand to her forehead and her face flushed. “Ey Ian, forgot to tell you, there’s this bloke I’ve been seein.”

           “Well jeez Felicia, surprised you didn’t wait until I was walking you down the aisle.” Ian had always been one to tell her about his latest fling, however he’s pretty sure she stopped paying attention at guy number 5, and that had only been a month in. He used to believe every guy would be the one, but after a harsh break up with a guy he’d dated for a year, he jumped off that train.

           “Who says you’re givin me away?” She put on a serious face, arms crossing across her chest in dismay, but they both knew that unless she was having the wedding in London, Ian was the only one that fit the job. Felicia’s mom had passed years ago, and her dad was barely hanging on since then, cancer eating away at his lungs. Her only brother stuck around to care for their father, while she’d run away at 16, and only went back for her mother’s funeral – he hated her. “I wanted to wait till it got serious. It got serious, then I forgot.”

           “Probably a few too many lines of coke. I told you that shit isn’t good for you.” Ian tutted his best friend – she was a party girl, but Ian figured out how to maneuver around it. He always let her do her thing, and did a good job at standing up to peer pressure. He had a lot more restraint than his older brother Lip, who was 24 and already a raging alcoholic. Ian was past his party days, and had enough on his plate these days without the booze and drugs plaguing him.

           “Good thing my fiancé don’t care how dumb I am. He loves me regardless.” Felicia flashed her ring again, if only so she could stare longingly at it, as if the man who’d given it to her would appear upon her wishes. “Tomorrow,” she pointed adamantly at Ian. “You’re taking me out for a celebratory drink.”

           “It’ll have to be an early drink. I go in at five, won’t be off until well after midnight.” Ian’s work hours were shit, and the job mundane. He crossed his arms all night as he worked as an intimidation technique at the fairytale, a gay club in Boys town. That’s how he’d met Felicia, a rowdy patron who was way too drunk, and he hadn’t taken a single step up the latter in three years. At least he still have a steady flow of cock, his one remaining vice – he’d even given up cigarettes along the way, allowing his lungs a break from nicotine and weed.

           “Pick me up at two for an afternoon cocktail.” Felicia shook his hand as if that were normal behavior – what, were they setting up some sort of business deal – the two friends had been more of huggers. “Tonight, it’s back to my fiancé, so you’ll have to party hard without me.” For Ian, that meant one beer in the privacy of his crappy apartment in the heart of Chicago, streaming Netflix through the night.

~

           “So, you have got to tell me about this guy.” They had been at the bar for all but ten minutes, with Felicia trying to distract him with crazy coworker stories – she worked reception at a law firm. The girl was already sipping her way through her second glass of whiskey, while Ian had taken a few sips from his Coca-Cola. The bartender had given him a dirty look when he turned down even a beer with minimal alcohol content. He was ready to find it a maddening bar like in the movie Coyote Ugly that would spray him down with water for his choice. “Come on, what’s his name again?”

           “Mickey,” Felicia said with a slap on his shoulder. “He’s the one.” She had always claimed not to believe in love, always cynical about the future, which likely explained why she’d kept this quiet. Boyfriends had only fucked her over in the past. “He’s fucking short, only an inch taller than me, but he never complains when I wear heals. He’s got these stupid tattoos on his knuckles, but somehow I find them endearing.” She went on, and Ian admired the look of love glowing from his best friend. He used to dream about something like that for himself, before he learned that no one would really care about a lunatic. He thought he’s had it with Jacob, but a year into their relationships, and Ian’s meds went haywire, and he was committed for a week. He returned to an empty apartment.

           “I think I’ll ask his sister Mandy to be my Maid of Honor. She’s a kickin girl. Maybe you can be a bridesmaid! We’ll deck you out in a pink frilly dress.” Ian rolled his eyes, because no matter how gay he was, he wouldn’t be caught dead in a dress. “We’ll make you look so good, Mickey might even take his eyes off me and find you so attractive he leaves me at the altar.”

           Ian waved his hands in refusal. “I don’t want your straight fiancés affection.” There were enough guys that wanted to fuck him not dressed as a girl. He didn’t need to dress in drag to attract men’s attention – oddly enough, gay guys still seemed to dig that.

           “Whatever. You don’t know what you’re missing. He’s got a great cock. He’d tear your ass apart.”

           “Oh come on, I don’t need to hear about your sex life. Now I’ll be staring at his dick when I meet him.” They both knew that Ian was a top, not gold star, he’d fucked around more than he wanted to admit sometimes, but straight cock in his ass was repulsive. For all the guys Felicia never told him about, Ian told her in gory detail about the guys he’d fucked – she was the only person he ran to when he bottomed for the first time without getting paid for it. She always drowned him out with alcohol.

           “Who ways you’re meetin him? You ain’t even invited to the wedding Ian Gallagher.” Felicia waved to the bartender for a refill on both of their drinks, even though he wasn’t quite halfway through his soda. “Fine!” She cried as if Ian had been begging her for the last second of silence. “You can meet him. But no acting all high and mighty just cause you can attract classier guys than me.” This fiancé of hers was Southside, one of the few things he managed to catch while absently watching her lips move. Ian had been born and raised in the Southside of Chicago, but ran and didn’t look back much after he joined the military at 18 – even if that hadn’t worked out for him.

           “Oh come on. That’s a low blow. Just because I hate my family doesn’t mean everyone from the neighborhood is like them.” Ian was 23, not some baby that didn’t understand how the world worked. He had his qualms with his family, but kept it between them. Felicia knew as little as he could get away with telling her about the other five Gallagher kids, and the only thing she knew about the deadbeat parents, was that Monica was dead. “I’m sure he’s a great guy.” He better have been good to Felicia, because she never deserved an asshole for a husband.

           “I’ll set something up when he ain’t working. He works construction; it’s fucking shitty, but as least he makes money.” Ian understood; before he’d gotten the job as a bouncer, he’d sifted through some pathetic jobs that paid the bills, and allowed him to live as far away from his siblings as he could. He hadn’t wanted to chance running into them after he’d left for good when he was 19, upon his diagnosis of bipolar disorder. They looked at him the way they looked at their mom – he was fucking insane.

           “Mickey will hate you. He thinks straight edge guys like you are pussies. Guess he’s not exactly wrong, with you at least.” Felicia knew better than that. Ian had a lot of demons that followed him, but mostly his mental illness; it made him weak in too many ways. It stopped him from partying along with his best friend, and left him home most nights. “We’ll have to get you to help with the wedding, god knows I don’t know shit.”

           “And I do?”

           “Duh, you’re gay.” Ian had never been a stereotypical gay man, but that didn’t make him any less of a fag. He’d never fucking paint his nails, or where make up. Ian would rather spend a day bulking up at the gym; all this after hiding his sexuality for a good chunk of his life. In the Southside, with all the uneducated bigots, racists, and homophobes, it was a death sentence for a gay man to even walk down the street.

           “Hey, shut your face. You’re on your own with the wedding. I’m just showing up to make sure you don’t trip on your dress. Wouldn’t want to make a fool of yourself on your wedding day, in front of your husband to be.” Ian finally managed to finish off his coke and put down money for both of their drinks. “Good talk. Can’t wait to meet the guy that puts that smile on your face.” He hugged her tightly as a formal goodbye, and headed out into the burning Chicago cold, and his beat up red Ford that barely ran anymore.

~

~

~

           Felicia and Ian hid together in a dimly lit corner booth, both drinking a beer, albeit Ian was a lot more cautious with his beverage. The brit had insisted they go to a steakhouse, and fill up on a twenty-five ounce steak, and one of each of the deserts for the three of them to split. The best friends saved eating out for special occasions, so that when they did, their bill was well over one hundred dollars, accompanied with a twenty dollar tip. It was just like when he was a kid, and Fiona would run into a bit of extra cash – usually they stuck with buffets. The restaurant was far from fancy, but it was their go-to place, and a couple waitresses recognized them – they only went about four times a year, but they’d been doing so for three years now, and the staff seemed pretty consistent. The booth they sat in was busting apart at the seams, and Ian pressed himself to the wall to avoid sitting on the slash across the middle of his side.

           “So, is Mickey just imaginary?” Ian pointed to the empty spot beside Felicia, and the third, unmoved menu. They’d waited an hour, and his best friend insisted they wait to order, because he promised he’d come, and Felicia still had faith in him. So Ian filled up on the bread the waitress kept bringing buy, and finally ordered himself something other than water. He’d done his best at attempting to not point out Mickey’s obvious tardiness, how bad of an impression Ian was getting of the guy.

           “He’s jus’ runnin’ late. He’ll come!” She was adamant about it, and Ian had no choice but to shut up and sit back with his nearly wasted friend. Felicia was moping, but refused to lose hope on her fiancé, and ordered herself another drink every time the waitress came back. There was a full glass of beer at the seat beside her that she’d ordered along with her first drink, but she left it, because he was fucking coming. Felicia pulled out her phone as her mope broke out into a fattening grin. “He’s jus’ parked. I told ya ‘e was comin’.” He was glad to be wrong.

           Ian hadn’t even seen a picture of the guy, so he hadn’t realized it was Mickey headed their way, until he slid in beside Felicia. His arm fell over her shoulder, and Ian recognized the knuckle tattoos, the only physical attribute she’d given him – this hand read fuck. Their lips slotted together in a brief greeting, and Felicia followed it with a hard punch to the shoulder. “That’s for bein’ late dickhead.”

           “Fucking bitch.” There was a small amount of scruff on Mickey’s chin, and his mop of hair was black, with a hint of something lighter there, and those eyes were a stunning shade of blue – Felicia’s dreamy talk hadn’t done them justice. “I’m sorry,” he spoke softly and ran his thumb over her cheek. He spared a glance across the table to Ian, directing his apology to the both of them. Mickey kept his right arm securely around Felicia’s shoulders, but reached his left out for Ian to shake. U-Up was scrawled across the four fingers in the same unsteady spray of unprofessional ink. “You must be Ian. This one talks about you a lot.”

           The handshake was strong, but not threatening, like he’d gotten from other guys when he’d befriended their girlfriends – if Ian was straight, he wouldn’t have a hard time stealing someone’s girl, the amount of times he’d gotten punched assure that. “You’re Mickey,” the redhead pointed out. “Can’t say I knew much about you before, but she’s talked non-stop these last few weeks.”

           “I wasn’t sure she’d ever let me meet you. So, what is it? You don’t seem like someone she should be hiding.” Mickey didn’t say a word when he picked up the lukewarm beer, and finished it in a few long gulps, slamming it harshly back to the table and motioning his finger at someone walking by for another. Pothole duty must have really done a number on him. “I thought my family was crazy, but this girl’s just as batshit insane.”

           They put their orders in five minutes later, and another round of bread was brought around to their table. Ian laid off this time, but Mickey was quick to slather butter on a slice and shoved it down. “This bitch packed me an apple for lunch, can you believe that. How is that supposed to stop my stomach rumbling while I pour concrete into holes? I’d get it if she was a health nut, but an apple is like two fucking calories and no protein.”

           “If you wanted a cook, you shouldn’t be marrying her.” Felicia had tried to make Ian a can of soup one time when he was low – she hadn’t realized that it was a lot different than the flu at the time. She got him moving pretty quickly when his microwave exploded, and she’d tried to heat it up, can and all. “She’s also a slob. Glad it’s you she’d marrying and not me.”

           “Doesn’t sound like you swing that way anyways.” Felicia had always mouthed off about how much a fag Ian was, which usually led to her attempting to set Ian up on dates. He wondered if Mickey had almost been the culprit of the setup, before she realized he was straight and falling head over heels for her. “Must’ve been hard. Southside ain’t the breeding ground for pride parades.” Ian wondered what had been done right for someone that was so obviously dragged deeply into the drugs and violence of that neighborhood, to turn into a guy that could casually sit across from Ian. He still didn’t feel safe walking in his own neighborhood without a knife in his pocket – everyone knew that the redheaded Gallagher was batshit crazy and gay, because the drunks liked to talk.

           “Did you get out?” Ian wasn’t doing much better than his siblings, but he could at least say he managed to move a few blocks away, and officially out of the Southside, even if his roots were still bred in his bones. He avoided that old rickety house on North Wallace, and the memories that dragged with it. The last time he’d gone home was when their mom died, otherwise he made everyone come to him.

           “Kind of. Spend a lot of time back there. My sister’s still there, with our older brother, but I don’t really live there.” Ian recognized the pain their upbringing instilled on everyone, and they could easily swap war stories. They could decide whose parents were worse – he knew Frank and Monica were tame compared to others, even with both of them fucking off all the time, the drugs, and the bruises Frank occasionally gave Ian. “Of course, this girl had her life set with a rich daddy in London.”

           “My father’s money doesn’t say shit about me,” Felicia quipped – she’d never gotten a penny. Each person at the booth was equally broke, despite her background. Felicia had ran off at sixteen, and had only seen her father a handful of times since. “In fact, thing we might have to dine and dash.” They’d done it once, but Ian had felt so guilty, that he’d gone back and left a hundred dollar bill on the hosts’ podium, because he’d had the money to pay. It was a lot different from when he was ten, and Frank and Monica took the five kids they had at the time to some fancy restaurant. Their mom had just come back, after she’d left five years ago, and the group of them obviously didn’t belong – should’ve been kicked out right away for their appearance, because they were definitely too poor to afford it. Frank had ushered him, Lip, and their five year old brother Carl through a window in the men’s restroom.

           “Need I remind you, the cops hate me enough,” Mickey announced, easily dismissing Felicia’s possibly serious idea. “Southside, man. The Milkovich name is akin for trouble.” The last named sparked familiarity in Ian, not that he remember any of them, except maybe the father.

           “Any relation to, uh…Jerry?”

           “Terry,” Mickey nodded. “Afraid to say I’m his blood. I’m his son.” Ian didn’t remember much about the guy, but Ian had seen him hanging around the Alibi, and Frank slurred about plenty of their fights, Monica might have fucked him too. Kev told horror stories about the different shenanigans the Milkovich patrons had gotten into, none of them the innocent childish type.

           “Seem like a handful,” Ian nodded in sympathy, but didn’t spill into the dramatics about their asshole fathers. Frank was a pathetic drunk that left his oldest daughter to raise five kids, and Ian would never forgive him. Even if Ian had found out that his biological father was one of Frank’s brothers, rich and everything, the real dream for anyone that grew up like them. Ian had learned of this when he was fifteen, and much to Lip’s dismay, he refused to confront his father, because he already had his family. Ian Gallagher was never one to take the easy way out. “So, you were unlucky enough to fall for Felicia,” Ian commented with a breathy chuckle. “Are you sure you know what you’re getting yourself into?”

           “Couldn’t ask for a better girl to spend my life with.” Mickey’s right arm had still been comfortably around Felicia’s shoulders, and he squeezed her close as he gushed about her. “I’ve lived with a girl like this one all my life. Guess it was just a test run, so I was ready for the real thing.” Mickey seemed genuinely happy, and it shown in the way his smile sparkled in those ocean blue eyes, and his face split as he let out gentle laughs. Everything told Ian that that was the kind of relationship he’d been dreaming of since he’d understood what it meant to be in love. He was glad Felicia was getting her fairytale ending.

           The arrival of the food halted conversation, as the couple seemed starved. Ian had made the mistake of filling up on the complimentary bread, and instead pushed his food around while participating in the conversation between bites. He laughed along with the jokes, and hung off Mickey’s childhood stories, sharing some stupid comments of his own. Nothing was really serious at the table. Ian knew as soon as Mickey stepped in, the dynamic between them would be changed, and they’d now be a trio. It wasn’t something he was ready to give up.

Ok, if you made it through that, please shoot me a message, or reply to this post. I’m just looking for either reassurance that it’s good, or ways to improve.

#gallavich #fanfiction #my writing