#i hate him and i hate every fucking person who tries to guilt me into voting for him

[fairuzfan]

Drives me crazy when people act like if you don’t vote for Biden it’ll be your fault if Trump gets elected. Actually I think it’s Bidens fault for becoming unelectable by supporting a genocide

It straight up is his fault. He underestimated the Arab population in major swing states yeah, but also he genuinely thought that he could get away with it. He thought that Palestinians would shut up and die or be subjugated. I have no interest in a war mongering genocider's protection and I believe if you feel protected by him then you are one of the people who benefit the most from the genocide of people around the world.

#i hate him and i hate every fucking person who tries to guilt me into voting for him #dont you fucking dare say the words trump is worse #i despise trump but stop making biden seem like hes not bad by comparison. #he is a genocider. he is completely and totally evil.

[januaryembrs]

CROSS MY HEART | Spencer Reid x wife!Reader

Request: read here

description: Spencer's wife struggles with the aftermath of JJ's confession

length: 1.5k

warnings: JJ's 14x15 confession spoilers (big ick, pull yourself together Jennifer) infidelity, thoughts of worthlessness, reader thinks Spencer is going to leave her for JJ.

authors note: I have loved JJ for all of fourteen seasons and fourteen episodes. this was a BIG ICK for me watching this won't lie

She should have known something was wrong the minute they left that damn store. 

It took her all of two seconds to throw herself into her husband’s arms, her voice choked with tears that had threatened to spill when she’d seen the video of Casey shooting at him, and she swore Spencer had never grabbed her so tight. 

“I thought you,” She sniffled, running her fingers through the back of his scalp, the entire spanse of his huge hands ran along her spine, counting every vertebra to make sure she was still intact, despite the fact he had been the one held hostage, “I thought he’d shot you- it came so close,” 

He hushed her mewls, a hand reaching to the back of her head and tucked her into his neck further, the sob rattling through her ribcage almost, almost, taking his mind entirely off what JJ had said in that stupid game of truth or dare. 

What the fuck did she mean she had always loved him? She had a husband and children who doted on her; Will, who loved every shred of her being like it was his only purpose in the world. His godsons who had known him as uncle Spencer since he’d held them in the hospital, covered in goop and looking like the cutest little aliens he’d ever seen. 

And yet JJ, his friend, perhaps one of his longest friends, was willing to throw it away for him? He, who had a wife he adored more than there were birds in the wind, leaves on an Autumn floor, more than there were galaxies in the damn cosmos. His wife, who had been there for him since the moment they’d met, who he’d known was the one since that first day she’d ran into him in the lobby, their files mixing together because neither of them had been watching where they were going, like one of those romcoms she forced him to watch and he pretended to hate, or like the silly thing she called fate that she insisted was very much real. 

Spencer was a man of statistics and numbers and facts; things he could see. But he was sure there was nothing in any textbook that could have ever made sense of how the one person so perfectly created for him, the blob of cells that made up his wife that seemed to call to his own as if they were coming home to one another, would have just so happened to bump into him on a random Tuesday in August. 

Most people waited decades for that kind of love, or something close, and he’d managed to get it at the ripe age of thirty three. 

And yet in the space of ten seconds, of four little words in a wretched game, he felt like the carpet had been pulled from beneath him. Because why would JJ, who saw as clearly as anyone else how much he cherished his wife and the future they were planning together, try to take that away from him?

And as if his own odd spiral of thoughts wasn’t a kick to the gut enough, his sweet wife had quickly released him from her grasp and thrown herself at JJ, who seemed to just now be understanding the gravity of her words as she looked around with wide eyes, tear stains wetting her cheeks, the guilt gnawing in her gut already. 

“JJ! Are you okay? Oh, you poor thing, you must have been so scared,” She sobbed, wrapping her friend in a loving hug that was shakily reciprocated, like JJ was waiting for the second she would get a fat shiner to the nose for confessing such a thing. 

But that never happened. Instead, she pulled away from the frozen blonde woman, who looked like she could burst into tears then and there and apologise for everything until her face turned blue, and ran a kind hand over the JJ's hair, stroking it behind her ear tenderly as she tried to quell her cries because she wasn't the one who had been held at gunpoint. 

She didn’t know. It hit them both at the same time. She didn’t know what JJ had said, hadn’t even got an inkling into what had happened, and god did it make the sinking feeling in Spencer’s chest swallow itself up into something the size of the Mariana Trench. 

And what was left, what had for a second been a horrid mix of confusion, shock, fear and then another big dollop of confusion for good measure, quickly was dragged away by the current and replaced with anger. 

Anger that JJ could do something like this to his wife; he frankly didn’t care how her words had affected him, that if he had been single he would have been left feeling unworthy of her affection the first time it had been offered around, like there was something so disgustingly wrong with him this was what it took for her to say anything. He didn’t care about any of that. He cared that this would absolutely destroy his wife. 

And it was for that reason Spencer hurried the paramedics into fixing the small graze on his palm as he watched with boiling blood his wife tend to JJ like she would any other time her close friend was hurt in the field. He seethed whenever Jennifer would simper and avoid her friend's eyes, how his beautiful, caring, devoted wife would stroke the woman’s back and will her to talk, to tell her what to do to make it better.

Because it was her who should be fussing over his sweet wife, certainly not the other way around. 

But he couldn’t say that, not there at least, and so he didn’t, not until he had got the greenlight from the medics to leave and he had all but cut off the circulation in her fingers with how tight he’d held her hand as he led her to the car. 

Spencer said nothing, not wanting to fight when she forced him to sit shotgun as she climbed behind the wheel, not wanting to cause a commotion when there was a much bigger bombshell he was sitting on that he knew would change her feelings entirely. 

-

“What?” Her voice was soft still, a murmur in the quiet night air of their bedroom. She sat, fresh faced, minty breathed, kevlar vest long gone and replaced with one of his old Dr Who shirts and comfy bottoms.

She said the word again, like she hadn’t heard him, but judging by the way her expression had fallen into something dejected, he knew that wasn’t the case. 

Sighing, drawing gentle motions up and down her legs with his warm hands, shuffled closer where he kneeled down in front of her submittingly. “JJ said that she has always loved me; that was her ‘truth’ in the game,”

“Well, she-she was lying right?” His wife said quickly, her voice shaking, trying to make sense of it herself. She didn’t get an answer right away, just her husband’s eyes casting down as he tried to think of the best thing to say, “Right, Spencer?” 

“I don’t know,” He said earnestly, and he saw immediately the way tears sprung to her eyes, her bottom lip trembling, her face warming in wet-anger, “But it doesn’t change anything, sweetheart. It doesn’t matter, to me- baby, please don’t cry,”

“Ofcourse it changes things, Spencer, it’s JJ. She’s literally the hottest woman to walk the earth, Pen said you were like in love with her when you started the BAU, and now you have your chance,” She whimpered, fat tears rolling over her freshly moisturised cheeks, and he swore he felt his chest concave at her words. 

“My chance? I don’t want a chance, I want you,” Spencer said in earnest, his hands rubbing further and further up her legs until his hands went under her night shirt, grabbing onto the soft of her hips with pleading tenderness, “I want you forever, no matter what JJ or any other woman feels about me,” 

She sniffled pitifully, her eyes still unsure and he took it as a sign she needed more, so he leaned in fully to hug her to him. 

“But it’s JJ,” She said again, like that was going to change anything, and he shook his head, stroking over the back of her hair softly.

“I don't care,” He said, and she sniffed gently into the crook of his neck, his skin wetting with the contact. She finally wrapped her arms around him, and he knew he was close to getting it through to her, “I had the smallest crush on JJ, what, fifteen years ago? Honey, I want you for the rest of my life, and nothing and no one is going to change my mind about that, not even you.” 

“Really?” His sweet wife whispered tearfully, and he chuckled sadly, hating how hard she had cried that it had ripped the life from her voice. 

“Cross my heart,” He kissed her hairline softly, tipping her head upwards with one long, warm finger under her chin, pressing a gentle kiss to her wetted lips, “Hope I never die,”

She smiled sorrowfully, kissing her husband as if it was the last time she could ever do so, hoping it made up for how puffy and ugly her tears had made her face. But he didn’t care, he never had, he thought she was perfect just the way she was.

And he’d remind her of that any time she thought otherwise. 

–

#spencer reid imagine #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid x reader #matthew grey gubler x reader #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fic

[steddieas-shegoes]

It’s been done in every which way but Eddie being in an accident of some kind that leaves him paralyzed, but his doctors believe he could walk again with intense physical therapy

He’s stubborn and absolutely hasn’t dealt with any of the trauma of the accident and takes it out on his physical therapist, Steve, who is used to patients being pretty angry about their situation

He always meets Eddie where he is though, tries to keep a smile on his face and joke when appropriate and even shares his cookies from his lunchbox with him

Eventually, Eddie starts making some progress, but instead of being happy about it, he panics and cancels all his PT appointments for the week

Steve tries calling, texting, emailing, doing everything he can to encourage him to keep going, but it all goes unanswered until Gareth, one of Eddie’s closest friends, calls him on Eddie’s phone

He’s depressed and he won’t get out of bed, he’s given up. He’s tired of being in pain and having to try to so hard just to move his damn legs a little

Steve isn’t usually this personal with clients, and tells Gareth he can’t discuss anything medical with him due to patient confidentiality, but insists he should try to drag him to the office the next day before it opens

And somehow, probably through guilt, Gareth manages to wheel a very sullen and grumpy Eddie into the side door entrance to the office at seven in the morning

Steve tells him to come back in an hour to pick him up and Eddie ignores the goodbye Gareth says to him

And Steve pretends nothing is wrong at all, goes through the usual temperature and blood pressure check, asks how he’s feeling and gets a grunt in response, asks if there’s any pain and gets an eye roll

But Eddie met his match in Steve because Steve then pushes him to the center of the workout room, where a large mat is out and a walker is set to the side

“What’s that?”

“Your walker.”

“I don’t need one seeing as I can’t fucking walk.”

“You are today.”

And Steve knows he’s pushing and he hates being pushy

But he knows what his clients are capable of, and he knows without a single doubt in his mind that Eddie is ready to use the walker for five to ten minute increments. He has the leg strength and the stubbornness, he just needs the belief in himself

“Do you want me to hurt myself worse?”

“Of course not. And if you get tired, the seat on the walker is right there. But you can walk and you will walk.”

“And if I call Gareth to come get me right now?”

“Then I don’t believe my services are of value to you anymore and I’ll wish you the best.”

It pained Steve to say it because he knew he was fucking good at what he did, maybe the best in town. His clients often had to wait for his availability to open for weeks or months at a time because of how many people were referred to him

But he said the right thing because Eddie huffed, groaned, and cursed under his breath before wheeling himself to the edge of the mat to hold onto the walker

He pulled himself up

His legs were shaking from not being used for the last few days more than the bare minimum, but his determination was clear

Steve slowly pulled the chair away as Eddie unlocked the brakes of the walker and glared at Steve as he took one step, then two

Sure, he was relying pretty heavily on the walker, maybe more than Steve would’ve liked to see, but he was moving

He made it across the mat and then locked the brakes, sat down on the pad on the walker, and gave a sarcastic grin to Steve

“Happy?”

“Are you?”

And maybe Eddie wasn’t ready to be asked that because he was suddenly sobbing, covering his face as tears flowed down his cheeks

Steve gave him a few seconds before moving to kneel in front of him, pulling his hands away

“You deserve to have your life back, Eddie. You’ve been lucky to have the chance to walk again. Let’s not waste it, okay?”

Eddie spent the rest of the session walking across the mat and taking breaks every two minutes or so

It was better than Steve even expected, but he reminded Eddie not to do too much at once

Eddie didn’t miss any more appointments with Steve, and every appointment, he seemed to be more charming and flirty, more like “the old Eddie” according to Gareth, who drove him most days

Steve never admitted it out loud, but he knew what he felt for Eddie was different from other clients. It felt more personal, and it felt like it could be more someday

When Eddie graduated to a cane, Steve’s services were officially no longer needed

And Eddie decided that he should probably take Steve out on a date

“Since I can walk and hold your hand now,” he winked.

Steve should say no, but he doesn’t

Because holding Eddie’s hand feels even more right as his boyfriend than it did as his physical therapist

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #headcanon #physical therapist Steve #idk going through my notes on things I’ll never have time to actually write #but maybe someone else does #I’m literally ignoring work so hard right now #I’m just tired!!!! #im just a girl who doesn’t wanna work anymore!!!! #cw: injury #cw: mention of accident

[ur-mousey]

Elevator Sex ~

Yandere! Landlord! Geto Suguru x F!Reader

summary Landlord Geto fucks you in the elevator. You will learn your place. 1.1k warning mature, smut, cheating?, voyeurism, non-con.

..............................

Geto Suguru spent many nights in the room over from yours. It was the closest seat in the complex to your strip tease. He hated that you started to refuse him small talk, to your gracious landlord, who built his schedule around your comings and goings. You should be cordial, to say the least. Each morning, he would remind you to double-check your person. You tended to be forgetful. Stupid poor thing, you were. When you first arrived, you were prone to call up at noon to have him search for your room key. Geto didn't mind. He felt less perverted in those times you begged him to check on things. He'd chalked it up to you flirting, especially when your used underwear found home in his pocket. And, every time you said it would be the last, yet, you would do it again. You had a knack for leaving important things behind just like you were doing him. For weeks, he would wave in the foyer after you got back from work, ushering you to converse with him. 

However, every single time, you would squirm into the comfort of your apartment. He'd even had to drill a hole through your wall to make up for you ignoring him. He assumed you felt guilt.

It was your fault that he had to refuse another tenant from moving next door. It was your fault he took the listing offline. He was losing money. But, watching your tits hang while you changed from your work clothes gave him much fapping material. The walls being thin allowed your voice to fall into his lap. When he caught you gurgling on that man's cock, he imagined your hollow cheeks milking him.

You would look so pretty, sopping on the floor, your silk ruining the carpets which he'll lick up after he wears you to sleep. And, he'd felt more than knew, that he would be enamored by your worship of his cock that he'll press you into a mating lock.

He wanted to see you bound to him through the most intimate action of man. Your precious pussy needed to pulse around his shaft. 

You needed to learn your place. 

Mediocre sex with your boyfriend pained him when he thought too much of it. He would rather watch your toys vibrate your blushing lips despite your stifling moans. That boyfriend of yours was arrogant. He left you without building your orgasm to its head. It felt pathetic. 

Your landlord decided it was time to get involved.

>>>

"I'll see you later tonight," Your boyfriend cooed. He dipped his head to catch your lips in a soft kiss. You sighed and rolled your eyes before softly reciprocating. He stroked his thumb over your cheek. 

You lifted your coffee to your lips, needing the caffeine to silence your budding words. Your boyfriend brought you out on your day off to get breakfast. While seated in the French-styled cafe, Naofumi explained his new promotion. You were excited for him. This new change meant an upgrade from his shitty apartment to a new one. However, it didn't mean you were in his plans. You've dated since high school. Took the entrance exams side by side, graduated college together, and now, you're here.

The changes don't seem noticeable until you read between the lines. He used to include 'we' in sentences, now it's 'I' this, 'me' that.

Now, as Naofumi gave one final squeeze to your hand, the only thing you could think of was your landlord, who was staring bullets at you through the glass doors. You were somewhat aware of his crush.

Like a puppy, he waited in the foyer for your return. 

"Welcome back," Geto Suguru lifted his chin. He stood in your path to the elevators, strong biceps pushed his plush tits to your attention.

You felt intimidated to give him more than a passing bow. You looked down at your shoes. The pressure of his gaze made you wonder what it would be like to take a chance with him. But, you did love Naofumi.

You tried to sidestep Geto. You failed to meet his gaze and you kept your head down. You clutched your purse to your chest.

"Take me to your unit." Geto commanded to your discomfort. Other tenants who were leaving the complex regarded his hulking frame. And they'd probably wondered what had you in his bad graces.

"Excuse me?" You stuttered, taking a step back.

Geto slipped behind your frame, he gently shoved you forward. His natural musk caused your nose to wrinkle. The blood rushed down to his shaft, his cock sprang into action in his sweats. "A few of the units been experiencing plumbing problems. There, I need to check yours."

Bullshit!

You lived on the tenth floor and you were prepared for the awkward ride up. Geto hit your floor button. The elevator began its climb from the first level to the third but between the fourth and fifth floor, Geto punched the control panel and the elevator came to a stop.

You laughed through your teeth, "Geto-san? What are you doing?"

"If you want to continue living here. There are some rules you need to follow~" Geto leaned his back against the door. He blocked your only means of escape.

"One, break up with your boyfriend. He's not allowed to step a foot in here or I might rip him apart. Hearing him fuck you… I can't anymore." You felt the onslaught of an up-and-coming panic attack. Did he listen to your sex life? Your legs squeezed tight together. "Second, you will quit your job. It's too deep into the city for me to ensure your safety.

"Geto-san…" You whined through a fit. You threw your cup filled with lukewarm coffee as if it could replicate an impenetrable fort. You felt like a child as you stomped and pleaded for the man to let you go.

You wished at this moment that you had something. Pepper spray or a switchblade. Anything that could get you elsewhere. Geto solemnly moved, he allowed your tantrum to fizzle out. He then stepped over the mess. "Last rule. From now until you die, we're partners. So start calling me by my name. Su-gu-ru."

>>>

Your head lulled to the side, you felt weighted down by the copious amounts of coffee and cum that your hair soaked up like a mop.

Hair clung to your body. You couldn't tell which of it were yours or his. Time didn't exist but you counted the number of times you tensed up around his thick cock. "Su-uh," The moans were knocked from within your chest, it bubbled at each hit to your cervix. Geto's hips shuttered against your weeping pussy. "I- I'll do it! Please stop."

You tried screaming earlier and it got your panties shoved into your mouth. You were at your breaking point. You would do anything to get him off of you. "I'll be your dirty little slut! Su, please finish!"

Your chest heaved forward when Geto pushed his palm down onto the base of your belly. He edged himself against your inner walls. The ends of his charcoal hair teased your clit, along with his thumb which thrummed heavenly on your nerve, and it ghosted along your thighs to the rhythm of his pumps. "I'll follow your rules. I won't talk to Nao anymore," You rambled back his earlier demands. You promised him through another fit of throwing arms and legs that you'll be perfect.

His perfect cockwarmer.

"He, eh, said that he would come later tonight." You whimpered out from between your lips that you bit carelessly. "Suguru, you can be there when I- break things off. Then I can call my boss and put in my 2-week notice. You'll have all of me!" You huffed. Geto embraced your cunt lapping at the tip of his cock. Even if he tried to pull out now, your pretty little pussy sucked him in deep.

.............................. Thank you for reading! I had something different planned but I haven’t finished writing it but I wanted to update. Please leave ideas in the comments! Request rules are here! >>> NEXT JJK POST: Yandere! God! Sukuna x Disciple! F!Reader! prt 2. You can read prt 1 here.

#smut fic #jjk smut #jjk fanfic #jjk geto #geto suguru #geto x reader #female reader #yandere #male yandere x reader #yandere geto #yandere jjk #tw noncon #jujutsu kaisen

[4xiaojun]

DEAR DIARY, I HATE JUNGWON !

SUMMARY | you hate jungwon- like a lot. everyone at your school knows it at this point, so why is it the minute you see him shed a tear, you feel bad? with this new found guilt, you're able to see new sides of jungwon that your anger blinded you from before. it doesn't take you long to realise that you don't hate these new sides of him as much as you'd like to.

PAIRING | jungwon x fem!reader

WC | 18.2k

WARNINGS | profanity, violence, vandalism, mentions of alcohol & sex

FEATURING | second lead sunghoon, heeseung is mentioned & ITZY

TAGLIST | unofficial taglist i just need the hype pls @tyunni @geombyu @yjwfav @junityy @jaeyunverse @ijhyo @equalheart @odxrilove @iyeonjuni @fairybinie

A/N | before u come at me for plagairising I AM HYUKAAS OKAY THIS IS MY FIC AHAHA IT'S A REPOST initially i was going to rewrite this but u all loved the og version so i'm going to give u the og version i literally have not changed a word. u guys gave this a lot of love on my old acc so i hope u enjoy :)

-

you: wtf

jung_1: ?

you: chemistry club??? really?

jung_1: i wanted the piano club

you: so what? me going isn't going to stop u

jung_1: u think i wanna see your face every day after school? 

class is enough smh

you: so u signed me up for chem?

jung_1: it was the only one left lol

you: stfu

jung_1: k lol

From what you can remember, Jungwon hasn't always been like this. You've tried to sit down and pinpoint a date back to when this all started, but the best you could come up with was when he blew out your candle at your eleventh birthday party. That was the first and last time you had ever invited him over to your house.

The two of you are neighbours, and yet you've never had a single decent conversation with the guy in your entire life. Ever since the two of you were little, Jungwon always found a way to laugh at you, talk shit about you or do something to purposely annoy you. Your friends always warned you not to do anything back, that he was only doing it to draw out a reaction, but it was so hard not to whenever you saw his stupid face. The fact that he's so popular in school doesn't help either. Whenever you complain about him to anyone, you're always met with the same thing: "But he's so nice to me." "He's not like that with me." "You must have done something to upset him, Jungwon is the sweetest."

Yeah, sweetest pain in your ass. There is literally nothing about him that you like. It's clear to everyone that you hate Jungwon. 

-

Sitting on your chair, you rest your chin on your palm as you stare at the whiteboard. You're fuming, to say the very least. Written on the board are everyone's names under the club they'd be joining as soon as the bell rings. Yours is supposed to be under piano club but instead it's under chemistry with only one other person who signed up. You barely even know who he is.

"Who's Sunghoon?" Your friend, Yuna, whispers.

You recognise the name (being in the same school for 3 years, it would be kind of rude not to) but you don’t really know who he is. “I think it’s the guy that ice skates.”

"He's so cute," Yuna gawks, "you're lucky you're gonna be alone with him for the rest of the year." 

You scrunch your face at your friend, before letting out a long sigh. "Yeah, doing chemistry." Fuck Jungwon, signing you up for a club that you're already failing in class, just so he can go to piano. You purposefully ran to the piano club stand so that you could sign it before him, but that asshole must have rubbed out your name and written his instead. As much as you despise him, you have to admit that was a clever thing to do. 

Yuna slaps you lightly, "Maybe you can get him to tutor you for free. I heard he gets people to pay him ₩75,000 per hour."

"No, I'm pretty sure the point of chemistry club is to have fun. He's probably gonna be a nerd the entire time," you grumble into your palm, already miserable about the hours and hours you're going to have to spend with a science nerd. There must have been dozens of clubs with spaces still available; Jungwon could have picked another music club, a sports club, literature, art, history, debate, politics, or even maths for God's sake. But the boy chose chemistry. He knows that you're failing all three of your sciences, so not only did he remove you from your favourite club, he put you into your worst enemy—second to Jungwon. God, did you want to pull out his stupid black hair right then.

“You’re not going to let him win this one, are you?” Yuna deadpans, probably bored from your endless war with Jungwon. You don’t blame her, if the tables were turned, you’d probably say the same things she does. “Just leave it.” “If you ignore him he’ll stop.” “Be the bigger person.” Blah blah blah. It would be humiliating to let Jungwon get away with anything. You can’t even imagine it, coming into school everyday and hearing him laugh at you as if he has the upper hand. You would never ever let that happen, not even over your dead body.

Brushing your hair out of your face, you chuckle breathlessly. “As if.” There is absolutely no way in hell that you would let Jungwon get away with ruining your after school club for the rest of the year. You had to come up with something big, something that would make him suffer just as much—no, more—for the whole year, too.

-

Sadly, you didn't have enough time to come up with a plan.

"Okay, so why is a fluoride ion bigger than a sodium ion?" 

You groan loudly, whacking your head against the table for what feels like the fiftieth time. You've been in this room for ten minutes with Sunghoon, and he's already managed to make it boring as hell. Optimistic, you came into this room hoping that Sunghoon would come up with some cool science-y project for the two of you to do. Instead, his idea of fun is extra homework. The guy seriously brought question packs for you two to do for a whole hour. 

What a joke.

"Sunghoon, why are you asking me like I know?"

He gives you a judgemental look, and at this point you're too bored to care about how stupid he thinks you are. You should be practising the piano and making keyboard remixes on the iMacs, not memorising the periodic table with a nerd. 

"Come on," he breaks into a nervous giggle, "this is like, the third question. We haven't even gotten to the hard part yet."

No. There's no way he's taking this club seriously. Dramatically, you push back your chair and glare at him. "You know what, I'm going to go get something to drink. You answer some questions while I'm gone, yeah?" You fake smile at him, unable to look at his nerdy face any longer. God, you hate science kids.

Skipping out of the classroom, you make your way to the vending machine. You need a warm drink to calm your stress down but the cafeteria is too far away so a bottle of apple juice should do. Anything that gives you an excuse to stay away from Sunghoon so that you can focus on your plan to get your revenge on–

"Oh, Y/N! What a coincidence!"

There it is, that dreaded, child-like voice you've grown to hate. Turning around, you're met with his half closed eyes and grin so upturned you can see his baby teeth. If you weren't in the middle of paying for your drink you would have slapped that smirk right off his face. Okay, maybe not, but it's really pissing you off. 

"Yeah right, you probably came here to laugh at me." You grumble, fumbling with the vending machine that's choosing not to be on your side today. 

He smiles again, shoving his hands in his pockets and shrugging like the oh so innocent boy he is. "I just wanted to check up on how you're doing in your new club. I understand, Y/N," he puts a hand on his chest, pouting, "I really do. Chemistry isn't for everyone."

You whip your head at him immediately, causing him to snort into his hand and break into a laughter that echoes in the empty hallway. "Wow, Jungwon, you're so funny. Don't think for a second that I'm going to let you get away with this."

He comes closer and leans his elbow on the machine so that his head is right above yours, his eyes locking right onto you. Every time he gets close, you're reminded of when Yuna tells you to take a good look at him to see what all the girls in your school sees. But all you can see is an arrogant, stuck up piece of shit—his only entertainment being getting on your nerves. You can see why someone would find him attractive. But his personality is so strong that it practically covers all of his charm to you.

"Admit it," he laughs, "you can't beat me this time. This is one of the best things I've done, I'm kinda' proud of this one. I mean, nothing beats the–"

"Shut up, I am going to beat you. As soon as school's over, I'm coming up with something." You scowl, punching the vending machine so that it will let your bottle fall.

Jungwon coos at you, finding this whole situation amusing. "Aw, is it that hard that it's taking up all your brain space?" He asks in a baby voice. "You can't think of a plan better than mine because you're so busy trying to figure out what O stands for?"

Too focused on the stupid machine, you ignore the menacing voice coming from your left. You've smacked it, shaken it, kicked it, you're not really sure what else there is to do.

Jungwon pushes you out of the way and resets your order, making your jaw drop as you see your bottle that was so close to falling go back to its spot. You shove him back, annoyed that he thinks he can do whatever he wants just because he's stronger than you. "Hey, that was–"

Jungwon sighs dramatically, before bringing out his wallet from his pocket and pulling out a credit card.

"Show off." You mumble, crossing your arms as you watch him dial his order.

"The machine clearly doesn't like you." He smirks, as his coke falls immediately.

You try to hold back how shocked you are, and the urge to ask him to order for you. But with the way Jungwon snickers at you, you can tell he already knows. It isn't like he's going to order for you anyway.

And you're right, because here he is, popping open his can and sipping it right in front of you. He's acting like he's in a commercial for the drink, all just to wind you up. But you can't let him win, you'll never let him win. So you stay, and watch him drink until the last drop and walk away slowly. 

Absolute pain in your ass.

Dear diary,

I hate Jungwon.

You're starting to get sick of starting all your diary entries with the same thing. Jungwon isn't even here; you're in your room, alone. There's nothing to remind you of him. Yet every night, you sit at your desk and scribble in your diary. And every night, you start off each entry reminding you that you hate him.

You flip through your diary entries of the past few weeks, and they're all starting to blur together. Each entry is almost as similar as the last. It's all the same thing—you hate Jungwon. You see him in the morning of school, your mood changes. You're reminded of him in your chemistry club, you get angry. You walk behind him on the way home from school, the two of you are arguing. 

When the hell is this going to end? 

To be honest, thinking about this is just making you hate him even more. The worst thing about this is that you can't even walk it off like you usually do at school. You're used to pacing the school corridors or the track field whenever he makes you really mad. But outside of school, you always meet him. It's either him, or his annoying and inappropriate older friends, or his evil dog. You'd rather rot in your room than risk having to waste your energy fighting with him, or running away from his dog, or pulling your skirt down from his friends. 

You're trapped. He gets to enjoy his life while you're trapped at home, writing “I hate Jungwon” in your diary every single day. The power this guy holds over you is huge, and you just can't wait to move out to college to finally get rid of him.

Walking down the hallway, you bump into your chemistry partner of the past two weeks. To be honest, you don’t think you’ve ever seen this boy outside of the chemistry club, so seeing him now, walking tall, hands in his pockets and a lot of other students around him was quite a shock. You really thought he was nothing more than a nerd. 

As soon as Sunghoon lays his eyes on you, he smiles widely and you can’t help the way your heart flutters a little at that. Did Jungwon really make you so angry about chemistry that you never noticed how good looking Sunghoon is? Or are you just that bad at it that you had no time to focus on Sunghoon’s looks? As he walks away from his friends and towards you, you gulp, brushing down your hair and skirt with your palms that are starting to sweat. You see this guy every single evening, what difference is it now? 

“Hi Y/N,” he smiles, one hand sitting attractively in his pocket and another rubbing the back of his neck.

“Hi,” you reply, but your voice comes out as barely a whisper. You’re a little frightened at how shy you are in front of Sunghoon right now, when you were literally cursing him off in your head yesterday because he laughed at you for not knowing an equation. 

He chuckles, and you swear your heart flips at the way his eyes crease when he does. “You know, I was starting to think that you didn’t even go to this school. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you around.”

Well, at least the feeling is mutual. “Yeah, me neither. I didn’t realise you’re kinda popular.” You say as you eye his large group of friends that are all waiting for him. “It must be the ice skating, right?” You joke, mentally slapping yourself for being rude.

Sunghoon laughs anyway, and he leans forward when does, making your heart nearly jump out of your chest. “Yeah, either that or my brain.”

“Nerd.” You playfully roll your eyes, finally being able to mix together the Sunghoon that gets all excited when he’s got a hard question right, and the Sunghoon that’s standing in front of you right now.

A voice interrupts the two of you. He always does. Whenever you manage to find a little bit of peace at school, Yang Jungwon always finds a way to ruin it. You’re so close to getting him charged for stalking at this point. Both you and Sunghoon turn around to see who was clearing their throat, and you almost growl when you do.

“What do you want?” You snap, not giving him the time of day.

Jungwon tilts his head with an offended look on his face and a hand on his heart like he always does. “That’s rude, Y/N, I was just–”

“She said what do you want.” Sunghoon deadpans beside you out of nowhere.

Jungwon furrows his brows, as do you. Nobody has ever come between the two of you bickering before, this was new to the both of you. You decided to stay quiet and see what Jungwon would say, a little nervous at how this might all play out. 

“What?” Jungwon chuckles, jutting out his chin to make himself appear taller. The two are practically the same height, but something about Sunghoon’s figure makes him seem so much taller than Jungwon. Are you about to witness an alpha brawl out?

Sunghoon doesn’t move, you don’t even think he’s breathing right now. His eyes are trained on Jungwon’s with a glare so intense even you’re a little scared. “Is there something you need to say to Y/N?”

Jungwon’s brows remain furrowed as his eyes narrow and an annoyed look spreads across his face. How ironic, he’s starting to look like you. You don’t think you’ve seen Jungwon this physically frustrated since the time his bike broke when he was thirteen and he tried to kick it but ended up spraining his ankle. He always looks amused. No matter the situation, Jungwon always has a smile on his face. Seeing him like this—threatened—caught you a little off guard.

“I can say whatever the hell I want to her, pretty boy.” He muttered, his face inches away from Sunghoon’s.

Someone behind you whispers something about their sexual tension, almost making you snort at the scene. You have to purse your lips together to stop yourself from laughing, because now you can’t unsee it.

“Well, too bad we have somewhere to be, don’t we, Y/N?” Sunghoon turns to you, and all of a sudden you can feel everyone’s eyes focusing on you.

You giggle awkwardly, before making eye contact with Jungwon. He’s never glared at you like this before, and for the first time you can think of, you feel small in front of him. “Uh, yeah, we should, uh, get going.”

Sunghoon grins at Jungwon as soon as you speak, and barges past his shoulder aggressively before pulling you by your wrist to go and follow him. For some reason, though, you can’t help but turn around to see Jungwon standing there, already looking right at you. 

-

“Sooo,” you sit on a desk as Sunghoon closes the door to the empty classroom the two of you are hiding in behind him, “you gonna’ explain what just happened?”

Sunghoon leans on the desk right in front of you and looks at you blankly, like what just happened didn’t happen at all. “What? You didn’t like it?”

“Like what? Jungwon’s probably going to be so mad because of this.” It’s true, the bike incident when he was thirteen led to him being extra rude for the whole time he was injured. You figure this time it’s his pride that’s hurt, so he’s going to lash out at you until he makes himself feel better. You haven’t even gotten back at him yet for the chemistry club situation, so you really don’t want to be dealing with a moody Jungwon; you’re scared of how creative he’s going to be.

Out of nowhere, Sunghoon lets out a dramatic groan, throwing his head back in vexation as he does. “Come on, Y/N, aren’t you bored of it?”

Confused, you answer. “Of what?”

“This whole cat and mouse deal you have going on with Jungwon? I remember being in the same class as you in our freshman year of high school, and everyone in the class was sick and tired of you two bickering everyday. I thought it’d blow over eventually. How are you still letting this go on?” 

You open your mouth to respond but nothing comes out. Of course you’re tired of it. Of course you want it to end. Of course you want nothing to do with Jungwon and you want a peaceful last year of school to focus on your exams and college. Of course you want to be able to hang out with your friends without thinking about Jungwon. Of course you want to write in your diary without mentioning him. Of course you’re sick of this all. But how the hell are you supposed to end it? You hate his guts and he hates yours. His pride may be thick but yours is definitely thicker.

This situation reminds you of the time you did try to be nice to Jungwon once, with the hopes all of this mess would end.

Your mum just got off the phone and suddenly bursted her way into the kitchen. A little startled at her fast movements, you followed her and sat on the counter. “Mum? What’s wrong?” Panicking, she gathered different ingredients and kitchenware to cook something, and you couldn’t be any more confused. “Mum! What’s going on?”

“The Yang family,” she started, already mixing away two eggs, “their son is sick. This is the only time she has ever asked me to do anything, Y/N. That family has looked down on us ever since we moved here, and not once has Mrs Yang ever asked for help. But she’s away, and her boy is at home sick without anyone to feed him. If I don’t make a good impression on that snobby little boy, they’ll think we’re incapable and cruel human beings. I have–”

“Okay, okay,” you laughed, not really thinking much of it. As far as you could care, Jungwon could starve. “As long as I’m not the one delivering it,” you mumbled, leaving the kitchen.

Of course you were the one delivering it.

Releasing a long sigh from the pit of your chest, you tried to put aside your pride and hatred to drop off the tray of food for Jungwon. You tried to remind yourself to have some humanity, that he was sick and alone and needed some food. The only thing that managed to help you push through was imagining him begging on his knees for food from you and you holding the tray away from his sick hands’ reach. A little evil, but it helped you press his doorbell.

When Jungwon opened the door, you could feel your heart sink to the ground. All those mischievous thoughts in your mind about teasing him flew out of your mind as soon as you got a good look at his face. He was extremely pale, and his eyes were red and glassy. He looked frail, like a single touch could knock him over. You gasped when you saw him, and immediately took a step inside to go and help him anyway you could.

“Hey, hey, are you okay?” You asked, placing the back of your palm on his head that was drenched in his sweat. “Oh, my God, you’re boiling. Jungwon, take your coat off.” Placing the tray on the ground, you tried to help him take off his coat but he wouldn’t budge. Looking back at him, he had a disgusted look on his face.

“What the hell are you doing? My mum said you came here to give me food, not baby me.” He shrugged his coat back on to stop it from sliding off his shoulder and snatched the tray up from the ground.

“What? I’m trying to help-”

“Who asked you to? Piss off, Y/N.”

Standing outside of his house, you were shocked. You were just trying to help him. You put aside the feelings you two had towards each other because he was sick. Even sick Jungwon is an asshole, you thought. That was when you made a mental note to never be nice to this guy ever again. He didn't deserve it.

“Y/N?” Sunghoon waves his hand in front of yours, forcing you out of your daydream. 

You shake your head, “Oh, sorry. What were you saying?”

Sunghoon stares at you for quite a while without saying anything, letting you scan his features freely. His dark hair extends at the back of his neck, kind of like a mullet, and it suits him a lot. His eyebrows are sharp, and you inwardly frown at how they look better taken care of than yours. His eyes aren’t anything special, but they’re looking at you intently right now; they look heavy, like he has a lot to say. Sunghoon’s lips, however, God you could stare at them forever. They’re so pink and plumpy, he’s definitely a good kisser.

“Are you staring at my lips right now?” Your eyes snap back to Sunghoon’s eyes in horror that he caught you. He laughs at your reaction, so you follow, covering your mouth with a hand. “So what’s the deal with you and Jungwon?” He asks after the two of you have calmed down. 

You shrug, wanting to avoid his question since you already ask yourself that every single day. “Nothing, really.”

“So, you just argue for fun? Masochism, I like it.” He chuckles, and you dart your eyes at him. “No, no I’m just saying, if you can’t even tell me why you two argue, what’s the point of doing it?” 

It’s a genuine question. It’s a question Yuna has asked you, your teachers have asked you, the other girls in your friend group have asked you, your parents have asked you, but most importantly one that you’ve asked yourself countless times. And you’re annoyed because the answer is there is no answer. You don’t ever remember doing anything to offend Jungwon when he first moved into your neighbourhood or your school. You just remember him being a little shit, thinking he could walk all over and bully you. But your dad brought you up differently, to stand up for yourself. That’s why Jungwon’s always on offence, and you always seem to be on the defence.

“I never start anything,” you look at Sunghoon, and you find it heartwarming how he’s listening so intently, “He’s always the one that approaches me, so I just bite back. If I never did, I would be crushed by now.” You explain, fiddling with the edge of your sleeve.

“So Jungwon’s a bully?” Sunghoon asks, and your body suddenly feels tons heavier. You hate that word, it just doesn’t sound right. 

“No, not a bully.”

“Sounds like it.” Sunghoon shrugs. “He’s mean to you so you’re mean back. Except it’s been going on for years.”

You get up from the desk and sit on another, feeling a little uncomfortable with this situation. “Um, I guess? It doesn’t bother me that much. It’s just becoming repetitive at this point. Today’s the first day he didn’t say something stupid. It was relieving, you know.” You explain, a smile unconsciously growing on your lips. 

“Don’t worry,” Sunghoon comes over, his wide chest blocking your field of vision, “now that you’ve got me around, he won’t bother you as much.”

-

Dear diary, 

I had fun today.

It’s only half way through your diary entry that you notice you didn’t start it off with the infamous “I hate Jungwon.” Actually, reading the entry made you realise how little you even saw him today. The only time you spoke to him was when you were with Sunghoon. How long has it been since the two of you didn’t have a petty argument? You find yourself smiling down at your diary, a wave of relief washing over your body at the thought of Sunghoon being your first step to freedom. 

You also find yourself smiling when you started scribbling down how fun your chemistry club was today. You and Sunghoon barely even finished a question, the two of you talking and laughing the entire time. He even promised that if he was ever free, he’d give you occasional free tutoring for chemistry. Life would be so much easier if Jungwon was more like Sunghoon, wouldn’t it?

Somebody should have warned you that your happiness is short lived, because while you were giving Yuna a detailed update of everything to do with Sunghoon, Jungwon’s voice echoed behind you. You promise yourself that one day, you need to creep up behind him and his friends and cut them off because this was really starting to piss you off.

You and Yuna turn around, both you offering him the exact same defeated look. 

“That Sunghoon guy,” Jungwon starts, taking slow steps towards you. “Since when did you two get close?”

Yuna scoffs loudly, putting a hand on her hip. “Why? You jealous, Yang?” Yeah, as if he would be. He’s probably jealous of you, seeing that tension between them yesterday.

Jungwon laughs sarcastically before turning back to you so fast you had to flinch your head backwards. He was a little too close for your liking so you stepped back. “Yeah, you wish. No, I’m just asking because he’s an asshole, and I don’t want to have to talk to him every time I wanna annoy you.” 

You push his shoulder away from you and laugh in disbelief. “Well, why don’t you just stop trying to annoy me then, huh?” You could tell what you said threw Jungwon off guard a little by the way he twitched his brows. This is the first time you’ve ever seen him take a second to come up with something to say, usually it’s second nature to him. You smirked, thanking God for giving you the upper hand today. “Aww, are you insecure, Jungwon? Does Sunghoon make you insecure?” You ask in that irritating baby voice he always uses on you. “Are you jealous because you’ll never have hair as good as his? Or because you’ll never be as good looking as him? Are you sad that–”

“Y/N, I’m not the one that attracts the opposite sex through pity.” 

That shuts you up completely, and your confidence withers to bits. He’s got that same disgusted look on his face as that day you went to visit him. It’s not like he’s never said something as harsh as that before, so you’re not really sure why this is affecting you so much. As embarrassing as it is to admit, that really hurt.

“First, he has to witness how horrible you are at chemistry. Then he saw you speaking to me, and probably felt bad for you. And let’s not even mention your looks.” Jungwon continues, peeling off every layer you’ve been forced to wrap around yourself ever since you met him. Slowly, he’s stripping away your pride, your dignity, and even your self esteem. “You think I’m jealous of a guy that sleeps around so much he probably has STDs? I think our fighting has made you forget that I also get girls, Y/N. I just don’t flout them for attention like he does.”

“Let’s go,” Yuna whispers, tugging on your sleeve. Your eyes are on the ground, unable to meet Jungwon’s. You’ve never felt so insignificant and helpless in front of him before, your body is unable to catch up with all these new emotions. “Come on, Y/N.”

The two of you are walking down the hallway, making your way to the bathroom. Tears are pooling in your eyes, something Jungwon has never managed to make happen. You feel so stupid, so stupid for letting him break you after all these years. All these years you wasted arguing with him almost every single day of your life. For what? What did either of you get out of it? You’ve never even stopped for a second to consider the words that you two were saying to each other, how much you were hurting each other. Well, you doubt you’ve ever really hurt Jungwon. He’s probably jumping up and down right now, cheering at the thought of finally winning. You just hope this means that it’s all over. You’re exhausted.

“Y/N?” Sunghoon’s voice appears just as you’re about to follow Yuna into the bathroom. 

You feel your breath grow heavier at the sound of his voice, humiliation rippling throughout your body. Maybe that’s why this affected you so much. Maybe it’s because Jungwon was calling you an idiot for thinking Sunghoon liked you. Because apparently he’s just another popular boy. And because apparently, he's just been fooling you.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Hurriedly, he walks up to you and places a hand atop your head, his doe eyes boring right into yours. You want to push him away so hard and tell him to go find another girl to play with, but all you can do is stare back at him. “Look, come here.” He pulls you away from the safe space of the female bathroom and right into the disabled ones. 

You don’t know why, but as soon as Sunghoon locks the door, your tears start falling against your will. On instinct, you turn away and bring a hand to stop yourself from sobbing audibly. If what Jungwon said is true, you cannot let Sunghoon see you crying. You’ve read enough romance books to know that bad boys love it when a girl is vulnerable. But Sunghoon doesn’t speak; you’re not even sure he moves. The room is silent, albeit your quick breaths and occasional sobs. At this point, you’re just letting your body move on its own. Your mum always tells you it’s best to cry it out, to let your emotions ride out their course. So you decide to stay there and continue to cry into your already soaked hands. 

Once you’re done wiping away your cheeks and rubbing your eyes, you make your way to the mirror to see what you look like. If Sunghoon wasn’t in the room you would have cried all over again just from seeing your reflection. “Ugh, I’m a mess.”

Sunghoon giggles, and lifts himself up from leaning against the door to come stand behind you. Gently, he brushes away strands of your hair from your face and fixes your collar for you. “I think,” he makes eye contact with you in the mirror, “you look just fine.” 

-

Dear diary,

Unfortunately, I still hate Jungwon.

“No, why are you starting it like that again?” Yuna huffs beside you, probably disappointed at your relapse. It’s been a week since Jungwon made you cry, and it’s been a calm week, too. You never told Sunghoon what happened, but he’s been staying by your side at school since. He likes to call himself your personal bullmastiff, and that he scares away Jungwon who’s only a sheep. Although you’re still terrified that what Jungwon said about Sunghoon being a manwhore is true, there’s still a part of you that hopes it isn’t. You’re hoping he isn’t just hanging around to get in your pants.

“Because I’m mad, Yuna. If we’re really ending this, I can’t be the only one that’s upset about it. I need to think of one final thing to get back at him. Something that will really hurt him.” You explain, really disappointed in how much you’ve been lacking this school year. You haven’t gotten him back once, and it’s frustrating you.

“Hm, what about his motorbike?” Yuna asks, an evil glint to her eyes.

“No.” You shake your head. “No way. I would love to, believe me–”

“So why not?”

“Because his parents would kill me!”

“Oh come on, that bike costs to them what a piece of gum costs to us, Y/N.”

“No, I heard him tell his friend. You know that pervert, Heeseung? Yeah, they were talking about it and Jungwon was saying that it’s from a limited series and that his parents had to fly out to Thailand to bid for it.” You whisper, for some reason you don’t really know. “Thailand, Yuna.”

“Okay, why don’t we wear masks? We can get Sunghoon to help us, too. You know, like them ski masks.” Yuna motions the mask with her hands, a persuasive look on her face. You’re tempted to, you really are. The thought of taking the only thing that Jungwon seems to have human feelings for away from him is very tempting.

“But wait, he wouldn’t know it’s me.”

“Uh, Y/N, that’s a good thing? If he knows it’s you, you’d be sued.” 

“Oh, yeah, true.”

“We can enjoy our victory from afar, okay?”

You suck in a deep breath. “Okay.”

-

This may be the worst idea you’ve ever thought of in your entire life.

Here you are, standing in between Sunghoon (who Yuna had to convince for hours to come along) and Yuna. The three of you are wearing your ski masks, but Sunghoon is too much of a cheapskate to buy a new one so he’s wearing his dad’s bright blue mask and making the three of you look stupid. 

“Okay, on the count of three–”

“No wait!” Sunghoon’s voice squeaks as he whisper-shouts.

You and Yuna whip your heads into his direction, stunned at his voice crack. “Sunghoon, you’re the only guy here!” You whisper-shout back. “You can’t be the scared one.”

“I have never broken the law before, if I get caught doing this my parents are going to kill me, Y/N.” He panics, yet neither of you can take him seriously with his idiotic mask on. 

“What are you talking about? I’m pretty sure you broke about five laws driving us here in your mum’s car.” You snap, before looking at Yuna. “But maybe he’s r–”

“No, guys it’s now or never.” Yuna whispers, before tugging on both yours and Sunghoon’s sleeves, running ahead. Your veins are booming so loud you’re worried someone will be able to hear it. Arriving at the tail of the motorcycle, you raise a trembling finger to touch it. You gasp when you do, already mentally hearing the sounds of sirens coming closer and closer.

Yuna pulls out a hairpin and shoves it into the keyhole of the motorcycle while you and Sunghoon crouch and cower behind her, failing to keep a proper look out. This feels so wrong, but it’s too late to go back now. Sunghoon’s stupid mask is probably plastered all over the CCTVs already. You’ll probably need a miracle to not get yourself landed in prison.

Yuna whimpers as she struggles to switch on the engine. You’re starting to panic even more now, the thought of this all going horribly wrong circling your mind repeatedly. “It’s not working!” She yells, and you and Sunghoon look at each other with wide eyes. 

“Go help her!” You motion at him, your heart drumming louder than it ever has before.

“What do you mean go help her, why don’t you go help her?!” Sunghoon doesn't budge and only tightens his hold on the tail of the motorcycle.

“No, I’m keeping look out!”

“No you’re not, you’re looking at me!”

“Will you two shut up and come help me?!” Yuna screams, and you shoot up to go over and help her. It’s useless, though. No matter how much the two of you twist and turn the hairpin, the engine doesn’t turn on. “Why isn’t it working? We practised this like a thousand times!”

“I don’t know! Maybe because it’s a limited edition?!” You scream back, the plan blowing up in your face. 

“Fuck!” Yuna slams the head of the bike in anger as you start to lose control of your breaths. “I think I’ve broken the keyhole.” 

You groan loudly, closing your eyes to think of a way to fix this. Trying so hard to calm yourself down, you attempt to come up with another plan. It’s either that or the three of you need to escape—now

But as always, Jungwon’s voice interrupts you. His timing is probably his only positive attribute.

“Hey!” He barks at the other end of the road, making you and Yuna look at each other like you’ve seen a ghost. He’s running as fast as he can, so much so you can see his forehead shining under the street lights. 

“Let’s ditch the bike!” 

“No! We can’t let this all be for nothing!” 

“Out of the way ladies!” Sunghoon’s voice appears out of nowhere, and you turn to see him standing over the bike with a large pole in his hands. Oh, my God. Instinctively, you and Yuna jump off the bike and run behind Sunghoon to watch him do his dirty work.

You poke out your head, trying to catch your breath and a glimpse of Jungwon. “He’s close, hurry up!”

“No!” Jungwon screams, reaching his arms out, dread written all over his little baby face. “Stop, please!”

Sunghoon ignores him and draws back the pole before slamming it against the metal of the motorcycle. He hits it again and again, parts flying all over the place each time. He yells at every impact, like he was beating up a person. 

Jungwon arrives, and you can't help but notice his breaths are shaky and the strands of hair sticking to his forehead. He pulls Sunghoon away from you and punches him right in the jaw, a roar ripping right from the bottom of his lungs. The light sensors of the neighbouring houses switch on, and some neighbours even come out to take a peek. With the rush of the scene flowing through your veins, and the fear that all of this is for nothing, you pick up the pole that fell out of Sunghoon’s hands and hit the bike yourself. Hearing Jungwon beg like that so helplessly for the first time in your life only fuels your anger even more. Each whack, each hit, your mind flashes back to the times Jungwon hurt you, the times Jungwon forced you to build another wall.

“What’s the point of going to the school dance? It’s not like anybody wants to go with you, anyway.” Whoops, there goes the headlight.

“Oh, my God, you might as well go home if you’re going to be dressed like that the entire trip. Stop embarrassing us.” Oh no, the brake is broken.

“You failed chemistry again? Look, guys, she got 10%! What a loser!” Aw man, now the gas tank is leaking.

Before you can damage the bike anymore, Yuna pulls you back into reality. She’s yelling something at you, but your eyes can’t help but focus on Jungwon struggling against Sunghoon’s hold. 

“Please! No, please stop! I’ll give you anything you want, just get away from my bike!” 

He’s crying. 

Your surroundings suddenly blur as Yuna pulls you towards the car you guys came in. She shoves you in while telling you something but you can’t shift your attention from Jungwon who’s now given up and is laying still on the floor. He isn’t even fighting Sunghoon anymore. He’s just still, the base of his palms rubbing his eyes as his tears roll off his cheeks and fall onto the floor.

You made Jungwon cry. You made Yang Jungwon cry.

-

You're ashamed. You can't even step outside your house without making sure your hood is well over your head, hiding your face for anyone to see. There's no way anyone in the neighbourhood could know that it was you, right? You were completely covered; it could have been any two girls and a guy who smashed Jungwon's precious bike and brought him to tears.

Literal freaking tears.

In all the years you two have fought, Jungwon only ever smiles. He grins, or laughs that really annoying laugh where he throws his head back and stamps his feet on the floor. He pretends to be upset by putting a hand on his heart and squeezing his eyes shut, letting out an exaggerated gasp. He pretends to be mad by putting his hands on his hips and tilting his head so far sideways his hair looks like it's about to fall off. Jungwon is expressive, he enjoys winding you up by acting out his emotions—real or fake—dramatically. You've always hated it, but now you're praying that you're going to meet him on your way to school and he'll pretend to whine about how much you hurt him last night.

You shift your weight from one foot to the other, waiting at the end of the road for Jungwon to appear. You're not really sure why. What are you even going to say if you see him? You can't even apologise for what you've done, his parents would definitely put you behind bars. The wait is killing you, impatience stirring in your stomach at an outrageous speed. Gulping, you contemplate whether you should go knock on his door or not. Maybe he's oversleeping because he's tired from last night. Maybe if you knock, he'll wake up and nag at you for babying him like he did before.

Without really thinking, you head straight to his front door step with your bottom lip tucked between your teeth. Breathing in, you press the doorbell. His house is huge, and the noise the doorbell makes almost frightens you out of your skin. The loud ring echoes in your mind loudly as you tap your foot on the ground and keep your eyes locked onto the door. You press it again. And again. And again.

And then you wait.

But Jungwon never comes out. Nobody does. Not him, his sister or his parents. You're even hoping some sort of maid will come and open the door. But nobody does. You're trying not to overthink the situation: maybe he's just being a teenage boy and angry that his bike is broken so he's decided to skip school today. 

The thought calms you down a little bit, so you turn around to leave. While turning back to the entrance, something shiny catches your eye around the corner of Jungwon's front yard. Curious, you scuttle towards it and poke your head around to see what it is. Your heart drops when you do. There it is. Jungwon's motorcycle that you smashed to pieces last night. Laying next to it, is an open box of tools, an unfinished cup of coffee, and Jungwon's jacket that he always wears under his blazer. The guilt at the pit of your stomach spreads around your body, squeezing your heart and scraping at your throat. Did he really stay up all night trying to fix it all by himself? 

Did you go too far?

-

"Come on, you're being weird." Sunghoon crosses his arms, not shifting his gaze away from you.

Usually, you appreciate his attentiveness because it makes you feel special and gets you all shy, but today it isn’t doing you any good. You chuckle breathlessly and pull the sheet of paper towards you. "So I just need to calculate the mass of this mole, right? Using this equation?"

Sunghoon sighs, "Y/N, you know you can tell me what's wrong, right?" 

You look up to meet his heavy gaze, his face already so close to yours. "No? Just because you chose to follow me around at school doesn't mean we're best friends, Sunghoon. It doesn't mean I can pour my heart out to you."

His expression doesn't falter, a blank look sitting on his face. "Then what are we?"

You pause, not really knowing how to answer that question. You're aware that he gives you butterflies, and that you find him attractive. But what about what Jungwon said about him sleeping around? Hasn't Sunghoon stayed around long enough for it to be more than that? Or is that all you guys are - good friends? But then why would Sunghoon ask that question? 

Confused and already emotionally drained from your crime yesterday, you scrunch up the question sheet in your hand and get up from your chair. Without saying a word to Sunghoon, you leave.

-

At home, you’re lying on your couch, flicking through the channels on the television. Nothing is exciting you since you can’t seem to pay attention to anything. There are only two things on your mind right now. Jungwon and Sunghoon.

As for Jungwon, you can’t stop picturing him in that little alleyway beside his house—sweating away, hurting himself trying to fix his motorcycle. He’s probably not eaten any real food in awhile, desperate to get it back to how it was before you and Yuna came up with that stupid plan. You groan into your hands, thinking about how you never thought you’d live to see the day you’d feel bad for Jungwon. Doesn’t he deserve this? Why does this bike mean so much to him? He can just fly out to Thailand and buy another one, right?

Then your thoughts suddenly shift to Sunghoon. If he really is the manwhore Jungwon pinned him out to be, how come he’s been nothing but supportive since you and Jungwon stopped talking to each other? There are no girls, you can’t see them. The only way it would be possible is if he has this whole other life outside of school. The partying, drinking and sex type of life. He said he’s never broken the law before, but he seemed pretty confident driving his mum’s car with one hand on the wheel and another on the radio. Do you even know Sunghoon? Sure, he’s a science nerd and likes to ice skate. But what else is there to him?

You sigh when the sound of the doorbell interrupts your thoughts. It’s 10pm, who could possibly be ringing at this time of night? Groggily, you get up, fixing your bun so you look a bit more appropriate for whoever it is that’s ruining your free time. Peering through the peephole, you’re only met with a man in a black hood who’s purposefully hiding his face from the door. A little worried, you call your mum over. “Mum! There’s a creepy man at the door!”

She hops out of the kitchen with a meat knife in one hand, a frying pan in the other and a terrified look on her face. “You take the knife,” she whispers, “and hide behind me while I hold the pan and see what this guy wants.”

“Wait, why am I holding the knife?” You point at yourself, your mum’s behaviour starting to affect you, too. 

The doorbell rings again and you both flinch. “Because if he sees the knife in my hand he might attack. So you hide behind me, okay? I’m just going to open the door like an inch wide, don’t worry.” Her eyes are wide while she tries to convince you to follow through with her not-well-thought out plan. 

You do anyway. “Okay.”

You take the knife from your mum before the two of you sneak towards the door. Hesitantly, she opens it, and the thought of her life being taken right before you flashes in your mind for a second. Right before she lets out a relieved laughter, a hand on her chest. “It’s just the Yangs’ kid, Y/N. Don’t scare me like that again.”

Jungwon? What the hell is he doing here? You poke your head out from beside her and see Jungwon looking down at his feet that are awkwardly kicking the floor. “I didn’t know it was him, sorry.” You mutter, furrowing your brows at him.

“I am so sorry, Jungwon. Is there something you need?” Your mum asks, widening the door. When he looks up, you can’t help but cringe. His eye bags are heavy, and his lips are so chapped they’re peeling. Not to mention how red and sore his eyes are, he’s struggling to even keep them open. He’s worse than the time you went to give him the tray of food. You don’t even realise that you two are staring at each other silently until your mum speaks up again. “Is something wrong?”

His eyes quickly divert to your mum’s and he clears his throat aggressively. “No, uh, I just wanted to know if your husband is here.”

Your mum shakes her head, “No, he’s visiting his brother right now. He won’t be back for a few days.” 

“Can you call him?” You don’t think you’ve ever seen Jungwon speak so meekly before. It’s odd, and the thought that you may have broken him makes your toes curl.

“Yes, yes, what do you want me to say?”

“How to fix a motorcycle brake. I remember that he had one a few years ago, so I thought he’d know.” 

“Oh! Was it your motorbike that got smashed by those teenagers?” Jungwon nods, his eyes falling to the ground again. “Ms Jung showed me her CCTV cameras and how horrible those kids were. Their parents really need to sort them out.” She tuts, pulling out her phone.

Even your mum is disgusted by your behaviour last night. Of course she is, what you did was way out of line. You play with your fingers as the guilt travels further, making you a lot more jittery than usual. “My dad’s break broke once and he showed me how to fix it. I can, uh, help if you want.” It’s the least you can do, an easy repair, indirectly apologise, and throw away this stupid guilt so you can focus on getting your school life back on track. Maybe after you help him fix his bike, the two of you can finally be even and put your pettiness in the past once and for all.

Jungwon only looks you in the eyes, not saying anything. They remind you of Sunghoons’; loud and heavy. 

“Oh, okay, that’s perfect. You go and help him. I’ll bring some snacks later.” Your mum pushes you out of the house, and you curse her for doing so when all you’re wearing is a hoodie, a pair of cycling shorts, and slippers. “Bye!” She waves, shutting the door in your face before you can even speak.

Well, this is awkward. Turning around, you try to put on a smile to Jungwon, but his eyes flicker straight from your eyes to your mouth before he storms back to his house. You follow him with a huff, realising that this is going to be a long hour. Catching up to him, you throw your hood over your head and stuff your hands in your pockets to try and stay warm. “So,” you start, trying to get straight to the point, “if we’re lucky, all you’ll need to do is clean the pistons. You know, those little metal things that open and close w-”

“I know what a piston is.” He grumbles, opening his gate. “I would have done that if that girl didn’t smash it off my bike.” 

Your eyes lower as he unknowingly mentions you, and try to shake off the feeling of guilt again. You never would have guessed this would have hurt him this much. But then again, isn’t that what you wanted? “Oh,” you chuckle awkwardly, “well then this is gonna take a long time.” 

The two of you arrive at the corner, and that’s when you notice there are three more cups of coffee lying next to the bike. You purse your lips, trying to throw away the imagination of him desperately attempting to stay awake, pushing his body well past its limits all in order to fix what you broke. 

“Okayyy,” you whisper, copying Jungwon by getting on your knees, followed by a hiss once you feel the cold rocky ground. Clearing your throat, you turn to him, who still has an emotionless look on his face. You really wish he would do something right now. You wouldn’t even mind it if he made fun of you. Staring at him like this, like an empty shell, is too much to bear. “So, where’s the brake?” You put out your hand, and Jungwon complies by giving it to you. Observing it, you’re relieved that it hasn’t been damaged too much, and that it’s okay to put it back on the bike. “First, we need to take the callipers off the bike.” You don’t explain what it is this time, since he got agitated when you did it before. “Should I do one side and you do the other?” 

He nods, so you crawl over to the other side, and together, the two of you start working on the bike.

After around twenty minutes of silent working, you decide to ask a question that’s been on your mind since the second you saw him cry. “Jungwon?” You ask. He doesn’t respond, but you know that he hears you. “Why don’t you just get your parents to buy you another one?”

It takes him a while to reply, you assume he’s just busy with the clamps. “They can’t. There’s no more on sale.” 

You’re aware that it sounds a bit harsh, but you still push. “Can’t they just buy another brand?” 

Jungwon’s eyes meet yours through the tiny gaps between the motorcycle parts. “I don’t want another one.”

You sigh at his vague responses. “Okay, what about hiring someone to come and fix your bike? Or getting a friend, literally anyone-”

Abruptly, Jungwon throws the clamp onto the floor, the ring of the metal bouncing around your skull. “I didn’t ask you to come and help, you know? You offered. If you don’t want to, there’s nothing stopping you from leaving.” He spits, his eyes piercing into yours angrily. 

You put your hands up in a feign defence. “I’m sorry, I was just asking.” You mutter under your breath, a little shocked at his reaction. “I’m okay with fixing the bike, it just looked like you didn’t wanna ask so I was telling you there are other options.” 

Jungwon sighs, before picking up the clamp and getting back to work. “I know.” He mumbles, and you can hear the piston creaking under the pressure of his clamp hold. “I know there are other options, but I don’t trust any of them with this bike. I’ve known your dad for a while and I remember how much he cared about his bike, so I thought I’d just ask him to help.” The thought of Jungwon trusting your dad over his creepy friends makes you feel a lot better, but the sound of the piston about to snap distracts you.

Crawling back over, you return to Jungwon’s side. You don’t even notice that your thighs are touching each other when you reach out to take the clamp from his hands. He looks at you a little alarmed, but you respond with an awkward smile. “You’re putting too much pressure. You have to unstick one piston at a time, if you do it like that it’ll snap.” You explain, opting to do it yourself to save some time.

“How come you know how to fix a break?” He asks randomly, startling you a little bit. 

You stay focused while you answer him, your eyes not moving from the clamp. “Sometimes my dad teaches me things like this. He says he does it because he doesn’t have a son.”

“What other things has he taught you?” 

Since this is the first real conversation you’ve ever had with Jungwon, you decide not to question why he cares about your relationship with your dad so much.  “How to ride a bike, how to play football, how to put up a shelf, how to fix a laptop that’s had water spilled on it.” You giggle at the last one, memories piling into your head. Jungwon doesn’t say anything else so you turn around to see why. He’s just staring at your hands working with the clamp, so you choose to fill in the tense silence. “The time he broke his break, he called me over while I was studying. I told him that it’s not important since a motorcycle break and a bike break are two completely different things and that this would never come in handy.” You face Jungwon again, and his eyes meet yours. “Turns out it did come in handy.” 

There’s a moment, a long moment of comfortable silence with the two of you staring at each other. For the first time, you notice the shape of his eyes and how delicately pulled out they are. They’re kind of pretty, in a boyish sort of way. You can’t really believe you’ve been staring at these eyes for the past eight years without ever finding yourself swimming in them until now. 

Jungwon scoffs, breaking eye contact before taking a sip of his coffee. “I’m surprised you didn’t turn out heavy handed since you were basically brought up as a boy,” he mutters against the cup.

With that, you unconsciously suck in such a deep breath of air. A wave of relief washes over your body as you let out an incredibly loud laugh at his comment. There he is, the asshole that is Yang Jungwon. You seriously thought you broke him, but hearing him say something so rude wiped away any and all of your doubt. 

He’s back. And you couldn’t be more than happy about it. 

-

Walking into school the next day, you’re a little bit anxious. You’re anxious because:

You might bump into Sunghoon and he might start asking scary questions again

You might bump into Jungwon and have to start fighting again

You don’t want either of those scenarios to happen. So when Sunghoon spots you and says goodbye to his friends, you panic and pull onto your friend’s sleeve. “Quick, pretend we’re having a really serious and private conversation.”

She panics and tries to think of something to say. “Uh, I made out with Sunghoon at Ryujin’s party!” With her eyes shut, in front of everyone in the hallway, your friend, Chaeryeong, admitted to sleeping with Sunghoon. You spot him from the corner of your eye, freezing once he heard what Chaeyoung said, and you wait for him to come over and ask why you two are making up shit about him. He doesn’t. 

“Are you being serious right now? I said pretend, Chaeryeong.” Your hand slips away from hers as you look at her in pure disbelief.

“I’m sorry, it’s been on my mind a lot recently because he’s been hanging out with you so much. So when you said say something serious, that was the first thing I could think of.” She rushes, clearly panicked by your response.

“Wait,” you take a step closer to whisper, “When was this? Recently?”

She gives you a worried look, before turning around to see Sunghoon and then turning back to you. “Last, uh, Saturday?”

Saturday. Last Saturday. That was only four days ago. Four days ago you were FaceTiming him while he was helping you with your physics homework. Four days ago was when you asked if he could help you finally get over the Jungwon situation, and he told you that he really wanted to help because he couldn’t stand to see you so hurt. Four days ago was when you told Yuna you think you have a crush on him.

Stepping away, you give one last glance at Sunghoon. “I can't believe you,” you mutter, before turning around and storming away. You tell yourself the reason why you didn’t go up to him and scream in his face is because of the attention you would have gained, but it isn’t; you’re too scared to face him because you were already warned about him ages ago. As funny as it sounds, you should have listened to Jungwon.

-

“What?! Chaeryeong? Our Chaeryeong?” Yuna chokes on her water, surprised.

“Yeah,” you sigh, scribbling away in your notebook. “I’m not really bothered about that, I mean she can sleep with whoever she wants. It’s just, I really thought there was something between me and Sunghoon.” 

Yuna kisses her teeth before shaking her head. “Even I thought there was. Why is he always with you if he’s sleeping with other girls?” Her body simultaneously shivers with yours. “That’s just gross.”

“Maybe he just sees me as a friend. You know in those romance books where the hot guy who gets all the girls appreciates the girl who doesn’t wanna have sex with him and likes hanging around with her?”

“Y/N, they always end up falling in love.”

“Oh. Well, that’s not happening, is it?” You slouch in your seat. 

Jungwon walks into the room, and you smile at Yuna, happy to know that he’s back on his feet. You wait for him to say the same thing he always does when he walks past you to get to his seat. Anxiously, your foot taps on the ground as you nibble on your bottom lip, your eyes not moving from Jungwon’s.

Yuna taps you and leans in to whisper, “You can see it now, right?” Her eyebrows giggle, a huge smirk on her lips.

You cringe at what she said, refusing to let her silly thoughts get to your head. “Shut up,” you mutter, before turning back to see Jungwon talking to another classmate. You hate to admit it, but your eyes do linger on him a little longer. You can’t help but notice the long, dark strands of hair that almost cover his eyes. His nose and jawline are sharp, contrary to his soft and small lips. Your eyes trail down to his Adam's apple as he speaks, and you watch as it bobs up and down attentively. It’s strange that you’ve known Jungwon for so long, yet you’ve never actually taken the time out of your day to really look at him. Because he’s actually really good looking.

“See?” Yuna giggles, slapping your arm playfully. “You’re staring.”

Your head darts to her direction with wide eyes. “I’m just waiting for him to come over.”

“Nu-uh, you’re finally listening to me. I told you he gets girls.” She motions for you to lean in closer while she whispers. “Last year, I peeked into his locker on Valentine’s Day, and I counted thirteen letters, Y/N. Thir-teen.” 

Thirteen girls gave Jungwon a love letter last year? You scoff, resting your chin on your palm as you look at him again. If they knew what you knew, that Jungwon is a total asshole, you bet they’d run far away from him. “I don’t get it. Is it just because of his looks? Are they that shallow?”

Yuna shrugs from beside you. “Well, I’ve heard a lot of good things about him.”

You laugh sarcastically, “Are you gonna talk about the time he helped that one new student when she dropped her books on the floor again?”

“Well, there’s that. But there are other things, too, that I’ve tried to tell you but you just turn down because you hate him so much. Like the time he stopped a boy from getting bullied. It was so cool, Y/N, he just shoved the bully in his shoulders and looked him right in the eyes and told him to fuck off.” 

Something twists in your stomach at that word. It reminds you of when Sunghoon asked if 

Jungwon is just a bully. You can’t be staring at him now, talking about all the good deeds he’s done and why all the girls in your school have a crush on him. He’s mean. He’s insulted you, belittled you, degraded you. You could go on and on about all the times Jungwon has hurt you and laughed in your face whenever he did. He’s a selfish, spoiled rich kid that derives entertainment from picking on you. And like all your friends warn you not to do, you react, dragging it out longer. Maybe if you just stayed silent in the first place, this would have never continued for so long. 

Blinking, you suddenly realise that Jungwon is batting his eyes at you right in front of your face. You gasp, furrowing your eyes and jerking back once you realise how close his face is to yours. Shit, you spaced out and he caught you staring.

“What you staring at, number 23?” He asks, his old grin back on his face.

“Number 23?”

“Class ranks are up on the board.” He explains, and your heart drops to your feet when you realise what he’s saying. “You know,” Jungwon gets up, hands in his pockets as he peers down at you with that familiar evil glint in his eyes. “I thought signing you up for chemistry club would at least get you into the teens. But you only moved up one spot? One?”

Okay, you may have wanted normal Jungwon back, but did his first strike have to be so harsh? Getting up, you realise your legs are trembling. Something inside of you is telling you not to bite back this time, that it’s not worth it. If you truly want this war to end, then you have to be the bigger person and back down. Pursing your lips, you simply walk past him to follow the crowd of students into the hallway to see the class rankings. 

“Oh. My. God, Y/N. You should have seen the look on his face!” Yuna laughs, but you can’t join her. It was embarrassing to let him talk down to you like that. You wish you said something, but this needs to end. This is the first step you need to take.

“Let’s just focus on our class rankings for now.” You say, approaching the wall. 

Although Jungwon made fun of your rank, you have to hide a smile when you see it. It’s not high at all, but at least you’ve improved. With everything that’s been going on recently, you need something positive to cling onto. You pull out your phone to call your mum about your improvement, excited to hear about how proud she’ll be. 

But a voice from behind stops you. You can feel the heat of his body so close to yours, and your heart immediately starts doing backflips. “23rd? That means I’m going to have to spend a lot more time tutoring you, right?” His voice is uplifted, and that pisses you off even more.

Turning around, you furrow your brows and fold your arms. “Really? Are you just going to pretend that–”

Sunghoon, with his hands buried in his pockets and his lips pursed, shrugs. “I asked you what we are, and you just left.” 

That is very true. You did, quite rudely, leave. You erased that part of your day from your mind, and even avoided writing it down in your diary. All you needed was time, because the following week was when you and Yuna figured out what your feelings are towards him. Sighing, you answer. “I know.”

“I helped you break–” he pulls on your blazer to drag the two of you away from the crowd as he leans in to whisper, “I helped you break Jungwon's bike. I know you think that that's a normal thing for a guy like me, but it isn't. I don't go around, smashing people's things, you know. I did that for you, and all I got was a little thank you text.”

Everything he's saying is true, and that's frustrating you further.

“You can't be mad about who I sleep with, Y/N. I've been hovering around for so long, and still, the only guy you think of is Jungwon.”

“What are you even hanging around for, though? Jungwon he-he told me that you treat girls like trophies. I thought–” The eye contact Sunghoon holds with you is intense, he doesn't turn away once. You're too scared to break it because you've never seen him this serious before. 

“So you believed him over me? Someone that you ‘hate’ over a friend? You didn't even bring that up with me, Y/N!" He whisper-shouts, pressing an arm against the lockers beside him so that he can lower his head to meet yours. “You need to ask yourself what's your deal with Jungwon, because I'm not sure you really know what it is.” Gently, he lets go of your blazer and dusts it down with his hands, causing you to blush intensely. 

“You're gonna keep me up all night because of this, now, you know that, right?” You chuckle sarcastically, keeping your eyes on his hand that's lingering above yours. 

He chuckles back, “I know.” His hand stops hovering, and goes back to his pocket.

Looking up at him, you smile endearingly. “We can still be friends, right? Even if whatever this is doesn't sort out the way we want it to, you'll still be my friend.”

"Ayyyyy,” Sunghoon laughs, but it seems forced, and presses a finger into your shoulder. “You're just saying that for the free tutoring lessons.” 

-

Dear diary,

I hate Jungwon.

You groan into your arms after you realise what you've just written, disappointed in yourself. It's embarrassing to admit that Sunghoon is right, that Jungwon is constantly on your mind. If it's not the awful things he's said, or the stupid pranks he's played, then it's the way he puckers his lips together when he snorts out a laugh, or the way he wiggles his eyebrows at you to try and piss you off. You've probably never even scratched the surface of Jungwon's mind, yet he somehow lives in yours constantly.

A ping from your phone distracts you from your thoughts.

jung_1: my tire popped

you: and?

jung_1:  use your daddy skills to come and fix it

you:  if u think u can jus tell me what to do ???? then you're vv wrong :/

jung_1:  u came before what's wrong this time?

you: im busy

jung_1: so am i but i can't get anything done without my bike

you: u need to get it checked out professionally

ik u have some weird attachment issues to it but fixing the brakes and tires isn't enough to get that thing up and running again

jung_1: well, miss 23, unlike u i have a brain

fixing everything one at a time v slowly will work eventually

patience is key

so can u jus come already

you: what's in it for me?

jung_1: idk wtf

food?

you: do i look like a dog to u

jung_1: idk??? u name it ill get whatever u want

you: ok fine whatever

After you get dressed to go to Jungwon's house, you scribble one last thing into your diary before you go. 

Let's hope that when I come back, I won't be saying that I hate him again.

-

With a bag of food from your mum to give to Jungwon's parents, you ring his doorbell hesitantly. You will never get over the difference between your house and his despite the fact that you two live just a few houses away from each other. While yours is small and cosy with a garden full of roses and apple trees, Jungwon's stands tall—so modern that it doesn't even have a front garden, it's all just rock hard concrete. 

Opening the door you're met with a sour face when Jungwon looks you up and down. “What's that?” He asks, pointing at your carrier bag.

You inwardly sigh, reminding yourself of the trouble he's putting himself through because of you. “Homemade kimbap.” You hand it to him and he takes it cautiously, eyeing the bag like you hid a bomb in it. “Relax, my mum made it.”

Jungwon's head pops right up when you say that, and you swear his lips are trying their best not to pull up into a smile. Clearing his throat, however, he returns to his normal bitter expression and brushes his hair out of his gaze. “Whatever, come inside while I get dressed.” 

It's only when Jungwon mentions it that you look down and notice that he’s only wearing a pair of underwear. Making a mental note to never visit a teenage boy's house unannounced again, you awkwardly hop inside and sit on the kitchen counter that he directs you to wait at. 

While Jungwon is away, you're left with the housemaid. You've always guessed that they had one, yet you've never seen her leave the house before. Anyone could mistake this for slavery, how scary. 

“Are you Jungwon's friend?” She asks, opening the bag of kimbap that you brought. You nod, deciding it's best not to explain your confusing and infuriating situation to Jungwon's housemaid, and she smiles endearingly, taking out the food. “I'm surprised. He's only ever brought those two hooligans over.”

“Jeongseong and Heeseung?” You ask, chuckling.

She laughs with you at the mention of Jungwon's awful friends who you are secretly afraid of. “They're like Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum, them two. It's nice to see that some of his friends are sane.” As soon as she unwraps and sees the food, however, the housemaid gasps, a repelled look on her face.

“Is everything okay?” You ask, worried.

“Jungwon can't eat this, it isn't fresh.”

You open your mouth to explain that it had only just been cooked a few hours ago, but choose not to. This is Jungwon's rich and snobby lifestyle, there's no point arguing with someone who knows him a lot better than you do.

“What a waste,” she sighs, “I'll just have to throw it away.” You really want to yell at the woman for disrespecting your mother's food, but the thought of Jungwon's parents catching you screaming at their trusted maid through a secret camera and suing you scares you too much to do so.

But just before she's able to throw it away, Jungwon appears in a zipped up coat and joggers, an arm in front of the bin. “No, no, no, no, Mrs Kim, it's okay.” He says softly, a hand resting on her back as he smiles at her.

Smiles. Like, really smiles. He's acting so gentle around her it's scaring you. Lightly, he takes the dish from her hands and settles it on the middle counter opposite you. He doesn't look up, he just opens the tinfoil and lets his jaw drop slightly at the kimbap your mum forced you to roll for him. You'll never let him know that, though.

“Jungwon, it isn't fresh, you'll get sick.” Mrs Kim retorts, but he's already digging one out. You and Mrs Kim both silently watch Jungwon eat his food contently, and you hate to say it but he eats in such a cute way. His cheeks puff out and he takes such small nibbles of the food, like he's savouring it all. 

“Your mum made this?” He asks, his eyes wide. 

A little thrown off by him, you play with the strings of your jacket. “Uh, yeah. She just told me to bring this when I said I was coming over.” You answer awkwardly. He isn’t throwing any insults at you, and that’s something you still haven’t gotten used to. 

He raises his brows while nodding, continuing to eat his food, leaving you and Mrs Kim standing beside each other in an odd silence. That is, until she leans in to whisper something to you. “He’s never eaten my kimbap so happily before, I wonder what your mum put in this one.” There’s a scowl on her face as bitterness lingers around her words.

You chuckle breathlessly, not really sure why Jungwon’s devouring your mum’s kimbap either. “It’s nothing special.”

Jungwon eyes the two of you before mumbling, “Stop staring.” and grabbing the rest of the food and making his way towards the door. You hesitantly scuttle behind him after giving Mrs Kim an undeserved bow. What a rude woman.

“How’d you pop it?” You ask, staring at the tire in horror as you realise the inner tube is punctured and this is going to be a very long job.

He chuckles, rubbing his hand at the nape of his neck, “Uh, I left my glass out and when I was pushing the bike it kinda just rolled over it.”

Sighing, you give him a defeated expression, “Seriously? You just added to the list of things that I’ve already broken.”

“What?”

You have to stop your breath for a second in order to hide the look of down right fear on your face as you almost slipped the crime you committed. “List of things that need fixing, I mean.” You shake your head and tut, trying to act out feign annoyance. Slowly, you peer over to Jungwon to see if he’s caught on, and he’s just staring blankly. Clearing your throat, you decide changing the topic is your best option right now. “Uhm, do you have a puncture kit?”

Jungwon, after a very long staredown, eventually replies and hands over the kit to you. You have to thank the skies for not throwing you under the bus because that was way too close. Even your hands are shaking a little as you open the kit and get on your knees, the nerves making you very tense. You don’t even have the courage to start up a conversation, and so the two of you work in silence like you did the last time. 

After about an hour in, Jungwon speaks up. “My parents bought this for me.” 

Ignoring the way you jumped at the way his voice suddenly appeared out of nowhere, you scoff. “Well, it’s not like you’ve had to work a day in your life to earn enough money to buy this.”

The dark haired boy huffs, clearly vexed. “No, I mean, they actually bought it. Like it wasn’t just a written cheque, or money into my bank account, or bought online. They flew to Thailand with me to buy it.” He explains, and when you turn to him, his eyes are boring into yours. 

“Okay, and?” You chuckle again, not really paying much mind to his words and focusing on your work instead. It’s just a bike, what is he trying to say that’s so important?

Abruptly, he brings his hand to his laps and flashes you an offended look. Worried that you’ve pressed the wrong buttons, you stop too, quietly letting him continue. “You asked why I only wanted your dad’s help. I’m answering you, okay?”

“Okay, I get it.” 

“It’s- they don’t do that, they don’t go out with me for..me.” You still don’t have a clue what he’s talking about, but you nod anyway. “This bike, it’s the only reminder I have at this point that my parents love- not love, but, ugh, you know what I mean.” He rambles, playing with the strings of his tracksuit bottoms nervously.

Trying your very best to put the pieces together, you tilt your head and ask, “You don’t think your parents love you?”

“I mean, yeah,” he panics, “I’m sure they do, but they’re not like your parents, for example.”

“My parents?” Well, now you’re really lost.

Jungwon sighs, averting his gaze from you to the bike. “You know, like my dad never taught me the things yours did. My parents never dropped me off to school like yours did. My mum doesn’t even know how to cook..” He mumbles, his voice slowly drifting off with each sentence. 

“Jungwon,” you furrow your brows, “Have you been..comparing your parents to mine all these years?” Now that you think about it, there have been many times where you would be talking to your parents, and from the corner of your eye you’d stop Jungwon staring. You’ve always brushed it off, not wanting to think about the boy any more than you needed to, but now you’re thinking that maybe you should have. It’s common knowledge that money doesn’t buy you happiness, and you and Yuna have always blamed Jungwon’s lavish lifestyle for his bitchiness. But loneliness? That’s something you’ve never associated with him. 

Jungwon lets out a groan, before picking up a screwdriver again. “No.” He mutters under his breath, before turning his back to you completely.

Not wanting to prod at the situation any further, you hesitantly get back to work, too.

It’s been three hours since the two of you started working on the bike. Out of fear that Jungwon had caught on to what you said about you being the culprit, you tried helping him fix the other parts of the motorcycle, too. (Albeit your lack of knowledge of how to do so.) The alleyway has been silent for hours, the only noises were your uncomfortable giggles, shaky breaths and your nails tapping against anything they could find. Jungwon didn’t ask about your slip up, so you are hoping to God that he has no doubt about you because that would just be a one way ticket to jail. 

You don’t even realise that it’s 8pm, dark, and absolutely freezing until you find yourself shivering and brushing up your hands against your bare arms. Jungwon probably hears your chattering teeth as he looks over and juts his chin out at you. “You cold?” He asks, expressionless.

You nod immediately, standing up to stretch your legs and shake them to circulate some warmth around you. The only light the two of you have is the spotlight above you and it’s wearing out a little, making it difficult to see. “Just a little.”

Jungwon eyes your outfit, “You should have brought a coat,” he mutters, before doing the absolute unexpected.

Slack-jawed, you watch Jungwon unzip his puffer coat and hand it to you like it was normal for him to do so. With furrowed brows, you stand still, trying to find the catch behind his actions. “What?” He grumbles. “You’d rather freeze?”

Crossing your arms, you laugh at him. Seeing your breath fog up in the air, you start to reconsider declining his offer. “The last time you offered me a coat, Jungwon, it was from a dumpster. Everyone laughed at me because I had no idea and I wore it the entire PE session.” You explained, hoping he’d catch on to your lack of trust in him.

“Well, this isn’t from a dumpster, so just take it.” His arm is still extended, but you can’t bring yourself to take it from him.

“Just because I’ve come over to help you a few times,” you glare at him, “it doesn’t mean we’re friends now. This isn’t enough for me to forget everything you’ve done to me, Jungwon.” Saying this out loud to him for the first time feels weird. Neither of you have ever confronted each other about your situation. It’s always been avoided. 

Jungwon pulls his arm back towards him, before taking a few steps towards you. “I never said we’re friends, just take the fucking coat.” He curses aggressively, making you flinch a little.

But the two of you are fully aware that you won’t back down from anything without a fight. “I don’t want your coat, Jungwon. It’s bad enough that I’m here, fixing something that you have enough money to do yourself. I don’t need your stupid pity either.”

Chuckling in disbelief, Jungwon rolls his eyes and shoves the coat into your arms. “Again, all I asked was for you to fix the tire. You chose to stay longer. I told you last time that you’re more than welcome to leave if you don’t wanna be here!” He yells at you.

Jungwon has never shouted at you before. It’s always been snarky comments and childish insults. This is new, and you’re not really sure how to react to it.

“Fine! I will leave! I can’t believe I fucking rolled that kimbap for you myself because I was scared you hadn’t eaten anything.” You shout back, throwing his coat on the floor before storming to his gate. “You’re never going to change, are you?” You mumble, while trying to open his gate. 

Suddenly, you feel Jungwon’s hand belligerently pull your shoulder back so you can face him as his fingers tightly grip around your upper arm. His face is merely inches away from yours, eyes piercing right through you like a new found anger has lit inside of him. “I’ve not changed? I literally just offered you my coat.”

“Oh, wow, you’re such a saint, Jungwon.” You seethe, despite the fear running through your blood at the intensity of his glare. “What about me? Huh? I helped you fix half of your bike, I put up with the shitty chemistry club stunt you pulled on me, I helped make your food-”

“And I am trying my best to return the favour!” He snaps again, letting go of your arm.

It’s not until then that you notice a delivery driver parked right outside of Jungwon’s house. Looking over at him, you notice the bags of food in his hands as he awkwardly smiles at the two of you. Your gaze shifts between Jungwon and the driver a few times. “You ordered this?” You ask, pointing at the man who's given up smiling and is now impatiently waiting for you both to collect your food. “For us?”

“I don't like burgers.” He spits, picking up his coat off the ground to pull out his wallet.

While Jungwon is apologising and paying the delivery driver, you stare at your feet in regret. That was way too stubborn of you. Jungwon really was just trying to be helpful by giving you his coat, but you were too prideful to take it. You thought you were better than this, you thought you were better than him. Maybe this issue has always been a two-sided conflict and you've just been too angry to see otherwise.

“Here,” he hands you the bag, and this time you take it reluctantly. 

Pulling out the box to open it, you're met with a fresh little burger meal. It's not much. Hell, it's nothing at all since you're sure Jungwon can afford way more than this cheap rubbish. But it still warps a guilt around your body so twisted you feel too sick to eat the meal. 

A gasp falls from your lips as soon as it hits you; as soon as the realisation of why the bike Jungwon adores so much hits you. He’s connected to it emotionally. It’s the only form of love he’s ever gotten. And you broke it. You can’t believe you broke something so precious to someone. The silence is thick. You can't bring yourself to look at him. There's only one thing running through your mind right now.

He deserves to know what you did.

Your chest feels heavy as Jungwon goes back to sitting on the ground and working on his bike. Agitation punches at your heart while its beats echoes around your head.

He needs to know what you did.

Biting your nails, you turn around to face him. He's been working so hard for days, and it's all because of you. You went too far, and he's paying the consequences—when it should be you. Clearing your throat, you waste no time telling him. 

“I did it.”

Jungwon's hands stop moving, but his gaze remains on the motorcycle.  

“I broke your..I broke your motorbike.” You say hurriedly before nibbling on your bottom lip. He still doesn't move. “It wasn't just me, but I did pretty much most of it.” 

You wait for him to lash out and scream at you, to call the police and have you locked away for life. You wait for him to cry, or yell, or insult you. Anything. But instead he does nothing.

He just quietly says. “Get out.”

“Jungwon, I'm so sorry, I wanted to tell–”

“I said get out.” His voice is low and empty.

“I–”

He cuts you off by darting his head towards your direction and glowering at you. So you decide to leave.

-

Dear diary,

I messed up. Big time.

With not enough energy in your system to write anymore in your diary due to the hours of homework you’ve just spent, you pull out your phone instead. Opening Instagram, you decide to aimlessly scroll through your friends’ stories.

First up is Ryujin—dolled up and singing into the camera with a few other girls you mildly recognise. There must be a party, you think. Swiping, you see a picture of Yeji and her boyfriend with red paper cups in their hands, smiling really cheesily. You chuckle at the photo, swiping up and replying to her story with “couple goals fr”. The next video on Yeji’s story, however, forces you to sit up in your chair.

While it seems like a normal video of a normal high school party with Yeji and Jisu dancing away and screaming to the music, your eyes can’t help but wander to the person dancing by themself in the background.

Yang Jungwon. And he’s alone.

This throws you off completely, because from the few parties you’ve visited and from what you’ve seen on people’s stories, Jungwon’s always been one of the lives of the party. He’s always in his huge group of school friends, dancing in the middle of the room, screaming into the microphones, spraying people with water guns. Jungwon was in fact one of the reasons you don’t go to parties often, because you can’t escape his loud personality. So seeing him in the corner, alone, with a bland expression on his face, you feel your heart sink.

And for some reason, you find yourself throwing on an outfit, fixing your hair, putting on some makeup and rushing out the doors.

“Hey!” Yeji approaches you, squeezing your side. “Why didn’t you tell me you were coming, we would have got my man to pick you up!” She screams over the music, looking at you excitedly. 

Before you can answer her, Yeji’s dragging you further into the house. “It’s been so long since you’ve come to a party, Y/N!” She cheers, putting down her drink to hold onto your other hand and start dancing with you. Smiling awkwardly, you dance along a little, but your eyes keep batting around the room, searching for that one familiar face. Yeji leans forward to yell into your ear, “Is something wrong?!” 

You wince at the volume of her voice, flinching away in fear that she’ll damage your eardrum if she shouts any louder. “I’m fine! Have you seen-?!”

“Sunghoon?!” Yeji asks, both of your bodies still swaying along to the music. “Chaeryoung told us you broke it off with him! That’s why she’s over there with him now!” She points over to the kitchen where the two of them are. You watch as Chaeryoung giggles at whatever Sunghoon is saying, leaning into his taller frame and shyly touching his forearm. 

Well, that was quick of him to move on. 

Yeji holds onto both of your arms before looking into your eyes endearingly, “Do you still like him?! You know, we really need to talk about stuff like this more!” She explains as you squint your eyes, the LED flashing lights and blaring music making it difficult to focus on what she’s saying. “I miss our girly talks where we’d all talk about boys, and-!”

“Y/N!” Yuna appears from your left, immediately hugging you as she does. “You should have told me you were coming, we could have got Yeji’s boyfriend to pick you up!”

You and Yeji giggle at Yuna repeating the same phrase—realising that your whole friend group practically rely on Yeji’s boyfriend for travel. “It’s fine, I just came here for-!”

“Sunghoon?!” She asks, giving you an empathetic look. “He’s with Chaeryoung!” 

Now why does everyone assume you’re here for Sunghoon?

“No, I’m here for Jungwon!”

“What?!” Both your friends yell in unison, animating their confusion with their furrowed brows and cringed noses. 

“Jungwon!” 

Yuna eyes Yeji a little worriedly before she bends down to speak in your ear. “You’re not going to confess, are you?” Unfortunately, you haven’t given your best friend the news of what happened between you and your so-called-enemy, so you chuckle awkwardly when she asks. “Because my parents will kill me if they find out, Y/N.”

You shake your head and offer her a fake smile, “No, don’t worry, I just need to speak to him.”

Reluctantly, she lets you go and you search the house for Jungwon. But instead, you’re met with another distraction. Perfect.

You don’t even need to turn around to know that a certain black-haired tall boy is standing behind you as you recognise the feeling of his chest almost pressed against your back. Sighing aggravatingly, you turn around to meet him. “Hey.”

Sunghoon takes a few seconds to respond, his eyes roaming your face and outfit longingly. “It’s been awhile!” He shouts, giggling at the awkwardness of having to speak over the music before stuffing his hands in his jean pockets. “You look really nice!”

“What?!”

“I said, you look really nice!” He repeats, this time a beautiful smile washing over his strong features. He grins at you, smiling so wide you get a perfect view of his teeth and tiny eyes.

“Thank you! So do you!” You laugh, but your smile turns sour once you remember your last conversation with him and the reason why you’re here. 

Swiftly, Sunghoon pulls you by your waist, taking you by surprise. Keeping your attention on him distracted you from the shift in music from EDM to a much slower song, so when Sunghoon tugs you to dance with him, you’re panicking. His fingers hold you softly, barely touching you at all, and when you look up into his eyes, they’re already staring back down at you. He’s perfect; practically everything anyone wants in a partner. So why is Jungwon still the only person on your mind right now?

The room is a lot quieter now, so the two of you don’t need to scream in each other’s faces anymore. Thank God for that. 

“Who did you dress up for, pretty?” Your cheeks can’t help but flare up at the pet name, and you have to purse your lips from smiling like a child. “It definitely wasn’t for me, was it?” There’s a sad smile to his lips, causing you to break the heavy eye contact.

“I just didn’t want to stick out, that’s all. It’d be weird if I came in normal clothes.” Mumbling, you notice the way Sunghoon lets go of your waist with one hand, only to interlock it with yours. 

“So if you didn’t come here to party, why’d you come?” He asks, and all of a sudden the spinning is starting to make you a little dizzy.

You gaze up at him with round eyes, knowing full well that he’s aware of why you came here. You hate the fact that he’s forcing you to say it out loud—to come to terms with your emotions that you absolutely despise right now. Your life could be so much easier if you really did have feelings for Sunghoon (despite the fact that Chaeryoung likes him too, maybe that would have been a bit messy) because showing up to a loud, rowdy place like this for a boy who absolutely hates your guts is just too complicated for your heart to handle.

Liking Sunghoon would have been easier, and even though you’re dancing in his arms right now, you’re still choosing Jungwon.

“I need to tell him.”

“About the motorbike or about your feelings?” 

You gulp, nervously tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “I already told him about the bike. So now I need to apologise.”

“He’s hurt you, Y/N, really bad. I don’t get why you picked him.” His face is stern, making you tug your bottom lip between your teeth.

Slowly, you let go of Sunghoon’s hand, and take his other off your waist. Looking up at him, you offer him a heartfelt smile before resting your hands on his chest. You take in a deep breath before looking up at him directly and say, “Neither do I.”

And like the two of you are some characters ripped out of the pages of a novel, you break away from each other, time slowing down as you walk away from him. Seeing Chaeryoung latch onto him while you walk backwards puts you at ease a little, you hope he sees the charm in your friend, you really do. 

You’ve been searching for Jungwon for around ten minutes now, and you figure he’s left since you can’t go too far in a house, can you? You end up proving yourself wrong, however, when you walk into the upstairs balcony and spot him staring into the view. 

Quietly, you lean against the balcony beside him, keeping your eyes on him in case he makes an indication that he wants you to leave.

With his gaze locked onto the city, not even sparing you a glance, Jungwon sighs deeply. “What are you doing here?”

“I just needed some fresh air,” You lie, unable to muster up the courage to explain the real reason.

“Okay, well, I think you’ve breathed in enough and you can leave now.” He mutters through jarred teeth. He looks just as angry as the day you told him about the motorbike, the steam still whistling at the top of his head. His jaw is shut tight, making his jawline look sharp enough to stab you with, and his eyes are doing their own damage to the sky with how narrow he’s piercing them.

Turning to face him, you instinctively reach out your hand to hold his arm, “Jungwon, I’m sor-”

Of course he recoils his arm away and of course he gives you a disgusted look. It’s only natural—you kind of deserve this. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

His tone flicks a switch inside of you unknowingly as you retort, “I was just apologising?”

“No, you don’t get to apologise,” He points at you with one hand, his other leaning against the balcony frame. His brows are lowered and his tongue is occasionally poking the inside of his cheek. “You broke my..you broke my bike.” His voice breaks, and you notice the way his bottom lip quivers. “My bike. Do you know…do you know how many memories me and my parents made in Thailand? My dad taught me how to ride it, and my mum sat at the back of it while I drove on the beach and..” He sniffles, bringing up his hand to wipe at his eyes before turning away from you. “And then out of all people you ended up helping me fix it. You’re messed up, that’s-that’s not normal.” He mutters, in between quick and raspy breaths.

Watching the scene unfold in front of you, your eyes begin to tear up, too. You made Jungwon cry again. That’s twice. That’s one more than he’s done. Just when you thought you brought the old Jungwon back you broke him again. Seeing his shoulders shudder as he cries quietly into his hands has you clutching onto your chest tightly in hopes you don’t break, too.

“I’m sorry..” You whisper.

“You don’t get to say that!” He repeats, shouting into his hands. 

“But, I mean it,” you say a little louder, wiping away the tears that managed to slip out to keep your voice as still as possible.

Hastily, Jungwon turns back around, “No, you don’t get to say that because..” The dark haired boy brings down his hands to reveal his face. You’ve never seen him like this; eyes soaked and his nose red and swollen. “Because it should be me. And that’s why I’m so mad.”

“It should be you? Apologising?” You ask, unconsciously inching towards him, unaware of how close your bodies are.

His eyes wander around your face for a little while before he sucks in a deep breath, “Yeah, whatever.” Sniffling, he turns his head back to the view of the city. “Obviously, you only did that because of me.”

“No, Jungwon, that was something personal to you. I-I went too far.”

Taking you by surprise, he groans into his hand loudly before looking back at you again. “You didn’t know that it was personal!” He yells, forcing you to jerk your head back a little with wide eyes. “You didn’t know that because we don’t know each other! We don’t-!” His chest heaves laboriously as his brown eyes bore deep into yours. “We’ve known each other for so long, longer than Heeseung or Jongseong or..Sunghoon.” He mumbles the last part, his lips forming into a pout. 

“Yet we don’t know anything about each other?” You finish off his sentence, making sure to keep eye contact this time, because now is the time to let it all out. Now is the time for the two of you to confront the stupid situation you’ve trapped yourselves in for years. “I know,” You whisper, before pursing your lips, trying not to spill out every thought running through your mind right now.

You spot the way the shape of Jungwon’s eyes change from slitting to more rounded. They’re large and round at the front but pull out at the sides, similar to those of a cat. For some reason, his eyes are comforting. 

“Yeah..” He lets out a shaky breath. “All I know is that you’re this girl that lives across the street that has the most perfect life.”

You scoff, “Well, if you call bad grades and single-”

“You have parents that hug you every morning when you leave the house for school. You have friends that will stick by you even when you ask them to do something as stupid as break your neighbour’s bike.” You both chuckle at that bit. “You’re just.. I’ve always wanted to have that. Sometimes I think of what it would be like if I switched places with you.”

Naturally, you respond with, “Well, if you had to deal with a certain someone that makes you hate leaving your house everyday, I don’t think you’d want to be me.” You laugh at your joke, before noticing the way Jungwon’s face drops. Shit—he’s the certain someone. “Wait, I didn’t mean it like-”

“No you did. That’s why you broke my bike.” He says firmly, and the urge to look away pushes through and you turn your head away from him. 

You should know by now to always expect the unexpected when it comes from Jungwon. Because the next thing you hear is a muffled snort followed by a soft laughter. Looking back at him, you’re perplexed. Was this a joke? Was this all just another prank? Does he really have no feelings? Are the police waiting at the bottom of the house to lock you away for years? 

Jungwon breaks into an even louder laughter when he sees your expression, resting his elbows on the balcony rail and burying his head into his hands to try and quieten himself down. “I’m sorry,” he giggles, shaking his head, “It’s just.. I was such an asshole to you. My bike getting broken was just karma if you think about it.”

“Are you saying you deserve it?” You ask doubtfully, scared you’re dipping into hot water.

“It feels like it. I couldn’t stop thinking about how shocked you were when I was being nice for once. Like, I was really that bad, huh?”

You join in on his laughter, “We shouldn’t be laughing about this.” You say, before taking another look at Jungwon and bursting into another fit of giggles with him at the same time.

This is weird. Your arms are bumping against each other, you’re laughing so much your cheeks and throat are sore, and you can’t stop gazing into Jungwon’s eyes as you both smile with each other. You know. You’ve known since Sunghoon told you that you think about Jungwon way more than you should. You’ve known since the first time your legs touched each other accidentally that day you were fixing his bike. You’ve known since the time you watched him happily munch away on your mum’s kimbap. 

You know exactly why your heart is racing right now. Racing for the idiot you’ve been hating since you were eleven years old. Racing for your so-called-enemy of six years. Racing for the guy that just laughed about how badly he’s treated you. You’re so dumb, catching feelings for someone like Jungwon. Your cheeks should not be burning right now. He’s just Jungwon, you try to remind yourself.

Buried deep in your thoughts, you didn’t even realise the two of you have stopped laughing. It’s only now that you notice Jungwon’s eyes flickering between yours and your lips, and that he’s steadily leaning towards you. If your heart was racing before, it’s sprinting down a freaking marathon now. You stay still, waiting to see (or feel) whatever happens next. You’re too scared to initiate anything in case you freak the boy out and he backs away. Because what reason would he have to lean in right now? What reason would he have to like you back?

What reason would Yang Jungwon have to kiss you?

All of your questions fly out of the window as soon as his lips latch onto yours softly. Letting out a little gasp, although you were already expecting this, your hand flies to the balcony rail immediately. This is your first kiss. You always expected it to be more romantic; on a date with a guy in the park, or under a sakura tree at school. You never thought you’d kiss someone a few minutes after watching them cry their eyes out.

His lips are soft, though, so you close your eyes to feel them more. A hand reaches the back of your head as he tilts his head, a shaky breath blowing into yours. You can’t help but smile into the kiss, giggling at how inexperienced you both are. You both pull away, and you’re a little disappointed at the lack of..well..kissing there was. You’re pretty sure your lips are actually supposed to move in a kiss. So, pulling on every string of courage you have, you place your hands on either side of his shoulders and pull Jungwon in for a second round. This time, you tilt your head and open your lips a little, your stomach filling with butterflies when Jungwon lets out a sigh of relief against you. His movements are gentle, and the tenderness of his small lips opening and closing within yours causes your head to spin a little. He’s a little too good at this, his thumbs rubbing circles on either side of your waist making you feel all mushy inside. 

You hate him. You hate how good he is at kissing even though it’s his first time.

Pulling away, you can’t help but cover your face. Jungwon giggles at you quietly, making your body heat up even more. You feel his hands clasp around your wrists as he pulls them away from your face, shoving his right in yours. You’ve never seen this expression on his face before. His cheeks are bright red and puffed out, his lips are a little puffy and his eyes are rounder than you’ve ever seen them before. A genuine, really pretty smile sits on his lips as he speaks up again.

“We cannot tell anyone about this.”

“Agreed.”

-

A/N | and that's a wrap! i'm ngl i dont really understand the hype for this fic i wish i did things a lot differently ahahah,, but u guys really enjoyed it and that's all that matters!

#jungwon x y/n #jungwon x reader #jungwon x you #jungwon x female reader #jungwon fanfic #jungwon fluff #jungwon angst #jungwon drabbles #jungwon scenarios #jungwon imagines #enhypen x reader #enhypen x you #enhypen x female reader #enhypen angst #enhypen fluff #enhypen fic #yang jungwon x reader

[tragedybunny]

I Should Tell You - Chapter 1

༺Summary༻

In a fit of guilt, Astarion tries to confess his deception to you. At the last moment, he loses his nerve and ends your relationship with another lie. He's resigned himself to having lost his chance with you forever when once again everything changes. With the two of you out on your own, will he be able to take a chance and tell you everything, and will you forgive him when he does?

༺Pairing༻ Astarion x Female Reader

༺Warnings༻ Sexual references

༺Word Count༻ 1888

Astarion was, well, he was loath to admit it, but he was brooding. He’d taken up a private room at the Elfsong now that everything was over, one where he could keep protected from the sun while the rest of his companions, yourself included, lived their lives in the light of day. Slowly, condemned back to the shadows, locked in his room with drapes drawn tight against the burning daylight, he’d drifted further and further away from the group. Culminating in tonight, where he had one perfunctory drink at the farewell party and slipped off away from the group to hide out amongst his books and the shadows of his mind. 

For the last several weeks, everyone had put their all into assisting Baldur’s Gate in starting to rebuild. Those who were left anyway, Wyll and Karlach were in Avernus, and Lae’zel was off to wage war on Vlaakith. Now those who were left would be parting ways as well, Shadowheart to see the world, Gale back to Waterdeep, Jaheira and Minsc to rebuild the Baldur’s Gate Harpers, and you and Halsin…hells, he didn’t want to know. 

If he were being honest with himself, which felt like it was to be avoided these days, there was more to his self-imposed exile than returning to a nocturnal life. Seeing the two of you together made it feel like a dagger was shoved between his ribs and playing around with his insides. 

And the worst part was, it was all his fault. He couldn’t be mad at you or the infuriatingly perfect Druid. Well, he shouldn’t anyway, he still found himself wanting to shred Halsin’s throat with his teeth every time he pulled you close and kissed you like you were a goddess he was paying worship to. He’d done it to himself though, weaving a web of lies and manipulations so dense he’d trapped himself while you slipped through, unscathed. 

That web became too entangled with the way you’d stood firm against that Drow, for him. You’d seen him as a person, and he’d repaid that by seeing you as a pawn. At least at first. By the time you shouted at that vile creature on his behalf, he’d become so hopelessly lost in the strands of feeling that had grown and wrapped around his heart, he knew he had to give up the plan, and give you the truth, even if you hated him for it.  

As soon as your group had made camp that night, not far enough from the shadows of Moonrise Towers for anyone's comfort, he'd made his way over to you. “I want to thank you,” he’d started, sure of his course. “For what you said whilst in front of that vile Drow…

“...You made me realize I never stopped thinking like his slave.” He drew in a breath, despite the fact that he didn’t need it, and froze. Patiently, you stared up at him with that affectionate look you always had, giving him space to collect his thoughts. You, the fount of warmth and sweetness he didn’t deserve, the love he couldn’t hope to keep. Frantically, he willed himself to speak, to tell you what you needed to know, no matter the consequences.

“And I realize I don’t think I’m ready for a relationship.” The words had spilled out of his lips before he could think them through and he watched as your eyes widened in hurt. 

“Gods no, what the fuck are you doing,” he cursed himself, but still the words came. 

“Being with someone still feels tainted, I need to figure out who I am, what I want.” Finally, he’d bitten down on his own tongue to stop the tide, but the damage was done. 

Those loving eyes of yours sparkled with tears, but that composure he’d begrudgingly come to admire since he met you held firm. “Is this really what you want, Astarion?” 

“No, no, no. I want you, I want it to be real.” If he gave you the truth and you sent him away, he couldn’t bear it. At least this way he could salvage your friendship, still bask in your light from time to time. The excuse was flimsy, even to himself, but he’d been a liar from the start. 

“I think it's for the best, I'm sorry.” Twice, he’d lied to you, twice, there would never be any coming back from this. “Please don't be mad at me.”

You stepped forward and he instinctively came close to cowering away. But you weren’t intent on harming him, instead wrapping your arms around him in a gentle embrace. “I think I understand. I’m not mad if this is what you need.” 

Your arms felt as though they were crushing him, their touch burning his skin. The urge to pull away and flee was almost overwhelming. But you deserved this one last bit of comfort. “Thank you,” he murmured, resting his head on your shoulder, breathing you in, and resigning himself to a life without this.

After you finally pulled away, you went to his tent and packed your things, leaving to set up on your own and let him endure the night without you at his side. There was a time when he’d never believe his own space could feel so empty. Back in the spawn dormitory, he would have given anything for this solitude. Now it was wretched. And so his first night alone was passed in miserable resolution, and when the day dawned, he went on as though all was right. 

It wasn’t lost on him that you would eventually find other companionship, you were attractive, witty, brave, and immensely caring. And from what he’d seen, you certainly weren’t interested in a celibate lifestyle. That line of reasoning still didn't prepare him for the night the group camped outside Rivington. 

Astarion had just returned from a hunt, the blood of a rabbit fresh on his tongue. It wasn’t you but he hadn’t dared ask to touch your neck after everything, electing to spend his trance hours dreaming of those moments between you instead. It was better than the nightmares of Cazador and his tortures at least. As he’d crept into the circle of ruined buildings that camp had been set up in, he stopped short, the world feeling as though it was closing in around him. 

You were talking to Halsin, who held one of your hands in his, and somehow, even with his ridiculously large hands, delicately brushed a strand of hair behind your ear with the otherl. Time slowed and Astarion felt as though the blood in his stomach might make its way back out of his mouth. 

In the dim firelight, the stars gleaming without a cloud to obscure them, Halsin kissed you. Softly, slowly at first, and then his hands wandered to your hips to pull you in as he deepened it. Your hands came to rest on those broad shoulders and instead of pulling away as Astarion desperately hoped you would, you leaned into it, eager and wanting. He wasn’t close enough, but Astarion could swear he heard the little moan you probably made. The same sound you used to make for him. 

Halsin stared down at you after breaking the kiss, no doubt with naked lust written on his face, and offered you his hand again. And that was the that, the two of you began to quietly walk away from camp while Astarion fled to his tent, crawling into his bedroll and desperately choking down the sobs that threatened. 

It had been bound to happen, but how soon, was what burned from the inside out. Just like that, you’d forgotten all about him, as though he hadn’t mattered in the first place.  How dare you. He tried to summon anger with you, to wash away the pain. It was a betrayal, he had every right to be angry. You waited for no time at all, you moved on so easily, you…you just forgot he loved you. 

Not that he’d ever said it, but you must have known. The bedroll was even colder than usual as Astarion clung to the one object he found comfort in. Kept secreted away amongst his things, a shirt of yours he managed to pilfer before his botched confession. By day, it was tucked in his pack, and at night it filled his bedroll beside him. Pulling it into his arms, he inhaled what was left of your scent on it, and buried his face in the pillow to weep bitter tears. 

He emerged the next morning into daylight that no longer held the promise it had so recently. Almost immediately you ran to him, taking your arm in his, giving him a moment of foolish hope. If things had gone badly between you and Halsin, he would rectify his mistake and tell you everything, he privately swore. 

All it took was one look in your eyes to know that hope was in vain. “Astarion, I need to tell you something, and I wanted you to hear it from me first.” You led him away from the rest of the group, almost to the spot where he’d seen you with Halsin. The rest of your companions pretended not to notice the obvious personal moment occurring a stone's throw away from them.

It was a good thing he'd cried every tear he had last night. “Well go on Darling, don't keep me in suspense,” he plastered on a grin. 

“The thing is,” you look everywhere but at him, “Halsin and I, well, things happened between us last night, and I think I'd like to pursue whatever this is. It just felt right to tell you first.”

Astarion laughed, a hollow sound to his own ears, but convincing enough for you, it seemed. “My Dear, you were worrying yourself about this? Don't vex your pretty little head like that, I don't begrudge your need for intimacy. Even if I fail to understand the appeal of a man who's always going on about enjoying the freedom of nature's gifts.”

“Astarion,” you scolded, but a subtle smile told him you were relieved. “Behave yourself.”

“Let me have a little fun at your expense.” He disentangled his arm from yours, its warmth suddenly smothering. Taking your hand, he kissed it gently. “I'm glad, you deserve to be happy.” That part he did mean, even as he reviled how it was happening. “And I'm sure you and Halsin will be. Don't worry about me.”

“Please worry about me. Can't you see how I'm bleeding?”

Leaning up, you kissed his cheek, with all the gentleness in the world. “Thank you, Astarion, I'm glad you understand, I'd never want to hurt you.”

From that moment on, you were Halsin's and Astarion had to grin and pretend to be happy for you. That's what friends were for and you insisted you two were friends. The two of you seemed so disgustingly infatuated with each other, he wanted to scream at times. So naturally he'd assumed you'd be happily headed out on some grand, romantic journey together. 

Which was why it startled him to nearly a second death when you burst into his claimed sanctuary, clearly distraught and slamming the door behind you. “I'm sorry… I can't be in there,” you gasped out between sobs.

@micropoe10  @writingmysanity @mxxny-lupin @azu21

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[vampmorgue]

𝐓𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐃𝐨 𝐔𝐬 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭

𝐑𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐂𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐧 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

series masterlist

Chapter 1: Promises

📖 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘:

𝐀𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠-𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝, 𝐑𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐬𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭.

𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐆𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐬 red 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐦 𝐢𝐬 purple.

⚠ 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐒: 18+, afab reader, kook!reader, toxic!rafe, dark!rafe, ghostface!rafe, dark themes, toxic relationship, mentions of addiction, manipulation, jealousy, guilt tripping, love bombing, anxiety mention, profanity, [ smut: unprotected piv, dry humping, oral fem receiving, fingering, edging, slight face fucking?, handjob, missionary, cowgirl, overstim, praise, breeding & choking kink ] mentions of blood, slight gore, knife use, murder & death.

📑 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓: 3.7k

🦇 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄: it’s here!!! it’s also the way i was supposed to post this in the summer but then got unmotivated then got back on it and it’s perfect for the season now, happy october! anyway i’m so excited about this mini-series as i have loved the scream franchise for years so i hope you enjoy this as much as i did writing it. (this is also my first attempt at writing smut and actually posting it, but we all start somewhere so hopefully it’s decent.) let me know if you’d like to be on the taglist !

💌 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @assi-me-issa @darkscrossfire @mounthings

©𝐕𝐀𝐌𝐏𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐔𝐄 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐒 𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐄𝐃: 𝐃𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐳𝐞, 𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐲, 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐩𝐩/𝐰𝐞𝐛𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐞.

Ever since you got accepted into your dream university on the West Coast, you had a weight lifted off your shoulders, at least a little bit of it.

Your family and friends were all happy and excited for you to achieve your dreams that were coming true, except your boyfriend, Rafe who didn't seem too fond of it even if he said he was. There was only a month left until you had to leave for university, and it's been recently that you thought of breaking up with Rafe. As fucked up as you felt it was, you had your reasoning.

Before issues started, Rafe had given you a promise ring after you graduated high school, and you did see yourself with him as everything seemed so beautiful at the time if you put aside the bad parts beginning to worsen as you and Rafe had spent the entire summertime together meaning you had little time to yourself. Your reasoning for breaking up with him other than a long-distance relationship; Rafe's addiction was worsening then after a couple of tries of helping him was a fail and him treating you worse than ever, and your intuition was feeling weirder every day, you started questioning yourself if you wanted to be with someone like that, but when you took time to yourself while Rafe was away for a little while on vacation with his family, you discovered yourself more and needed to put yourself and dreams first. You couldn’t let anything get in the way of that just like Rafe and his problems were starting to affect it by distracting you. He had graduated a year before you, so you would’ve assumed he had his life figured out already, especially with the kind of father Rafe has, but he didn’t.

You told Rafe to come over as you wanted to tell him in person how you felt. He agreed to it since he wanted to spend more time with you before you left, even though he hated thinking about it, despising it even. Rafe never expected you to leave him, although it was a fear he had.

“Why did you start to think that us parting ways is the best idea?!” Rafe asks you with offense in his tone.

“Because it is!” you protest, “It’s always been my dream to go to school on the West Coast, and I want to focus on that— my career, everything!”

“We can make it work!” Rafe insists, “I can’t believe you want to throw away three years just like that?”

“That was never my plan, Rafe.” you say, “But as the day gets closer… I can’t see us together. You refuse any help on your addiction which is getting worse, and you know that. We’re both going on two completely different paths. We wouldn’t work— most long-distance relationships don't work."

“This is fucking bullshit,” Rafe mutters to himself, slamming your bedroom door shut and leaving your home.

This wasn’t over, even the relationship, and you knew you two would have to talk again, but you didn’t know when. You sigh as you sit on your bed running your fingers through your hair. A part of you felt awful and guilty, and the other part felt relieved to say how you felt toward him; it was like the knot in your stomach was finally detangled, but not completely.

Arguing with Rafe was exhausting enough, no matter how much you had tried giving out you're reasoning in whatever you two would go on about, but your boyfriend always had to have his way.

𖤓

The next night, to your surprise, he had called you first, but Rafe usually held in a grudge for more than a day, so you wondered what had changed if any change at all.

“Hey,” Rafe says through the phone.

“Hi, Rafe,”

“Listen I... I’m sorry about yesterday,” he apologizes, “I just think you haven’t thought it through enough… I love you, Y/N.”

You felt sorry not only for yourself but for him, too. Your gut telling you one thing, but your heart was telling you another. You started to fidget with your promise ring, but you couldn’t take it off nor return it, and it’s not like Rafe would accept the ring back because he wouldn’t and more than likely would never, and a cloud of confusion was surrounding you. Maybe giving him a chance couldn’t seem to hurt you as much as you thought it could.

“Just come over so we can talk things out,” you respond, rubbing the side of your temple.

And with that, Rafe didn’t hesitate and was over within ten minutes. You had texted him to let him know that the front door of your home was unlocked and to head over to your room.

You heard footsteps approaching and saw the door opening with Rafe behind it with slightly red eyes and dilated pupils. Perhaps he was crying as your initial thought while also in denial that he was high, but you were afraid to ask as you wanted the night to end up good and both sides happy and not lose sleep due to your boyfriend's issues. Anxiety was running through you as it made you feel sick to your stomach.

“Look, I’m sorry about last night,” he continues, “I-I shouldn’t have walked out like that, but I also should’ve listened to how you felt.”

“Yes, you should’ve, Rafe.” you express, crossing your arms.

“Y/N, I’m just worried, okay?!” Rafe gestures with his hands.

“About what?”

“You,”

“What about me?”

He sighs as he’s already frustrated with the conversation, “Your safety… you’re on the other side of the country. How will I know you’ll be okay at all times? I can barely even visit you on top of that— it’s just messing with me, okay? I-I don’t know how I’m supposed to cope with this. I need you to tell me how to cope."

“You’re proving my point exactly.” you imply, playing with your ring, “I knew you wouldn’t take it well, and I’d rather you focus on yourself, especially on how much pressure your father is putting on you about the business.”

“Hey! I didn’t come here to talk about that, alright?” he snaps quickly but stops himself from getting even more angry. “Sorry, bad habit…”

“So I’ve seen,” you nod, taking a step closer to him, “But this is both of our futures we’re talking about.”

“I got mine figured out.” he shrugs in denial, “I just need you to figure out yours, that’s all.”

You chuckle in disbelief, “I’ve already told you mine, Rafe. I suggest you listen to your own advice like do you even hear yourself right now?”

"Y/N, I can't imagine my life without you when you play such a big part in it." Rafe vents, “How are you going to be okay there all alone?”

“I can take care of myself just fine, but I won’t be alone,” you mention, “My best friend, Axel got accepted there, too, remember?”

His eyes narrowed at the name you had just mentioned. "Yeah, I remember." He didn’t like that.

Rafe had always shown jealousy towards your best friend, Axel, ever since you two started dating. It wasn’t much of a problem until Rafe had spammed you with calls and texts then confrontations in the end when you were out with Axel more than you had planned to.

He felt as if he were to lose you to someone or something then he knew a part of him would die. He couldn’t bear the thought, even just living in the reality of it and his worst nightmare seeming to come true.

"Please, just give us a chance. I want to make this work out for the both of us," he begs, taking your hands with his and rubbing the ring.

“I’ve given you chances before!” you acknowledge.

“But this time is different! I promise!” he pleads with desperation written all over his eyes.

"And you’ve made promises before that weren’t kept!” you exclaim, pulling your hands away from his.

You felt stuck in the situation. You wanted to cry out of the stress and frustration because it felt like choosing between Rafe and your future, but was Rafe a part of your future or not?

“I won’t break another this time, I promise.” he went on, “This is going to be different, okay? I never want us to be apart…”

His words made you feel a little uneasy, but you didn’t know what to do at this point.

“Let me think about it, please,” you insist, wanting to be left alone in your thoughts, “Just go home and get some rest.”

He nods but then hesitates to leave, “Can I at least show you that I do love you?”

Your eyebrows knit together in confusion, but you agree to it anyway, “Yeah… sure,”

Rafe grabs your waist and pulls you into a kiss to show you that he’s missed this and you especially. After the tension near the end of summer, you and Rafe weren’t as intimate with each other as you both were before, except now everything was slowly coming back as it once was. You kiss back, and you’re surprised at yourself but mostly content.

He lays you onto your bed slowly as he goes down your neck with kisses and marks you. One thing about Rafe is that he was always going to make sure the hickeys were always visible. He tugs off the end of your shirt and looks at you for permission, and you nod, but he needs you to say it.

“I need to hear you say it, baby,”

“Yes, go on,” you answer.

Rafe lifts your shirt off as you take his off too and reveals that you’re not wearing a bra, no complaints though, he loves it. “Fuck, you’re so perfect,” his eyes scan you and his hand travels to your breast, squeezing one as he marks the other making you whine. He was still on top of you and went back to kissing your lips, caressing your neck slightly, and gripping it while grinding himself on you as you felt him getting hard through his clothing. Rafe was eager, but so were you. Perhaps you were missing the feeling of being wanted by the other, maybe it was driving you into that stressful mindset earlier, and maybe you just needed to get fucked; it has been a while.

His arousal was turning you on even more, but you already wanted and needed more of him. “Please… I need you, Rafe.”

“I’m all yours,” he assures while getting up and pulling down your shorts and lowering his head, giving kisses to your inner thighs. He wraps his arms around your thighs and goes down on you with his tongue swirling around your clit and sucking harshly. Two of his fingers enter inside your folds, going in and out at a slow pace only to tease you while his cold rings add to the sensation. “Go faster,” you say.

Rafe does as you say while he devours you as if he is craving you, which he is. “Oh, fuck,” you moan, arching your back as you grind against his mouth. He smirks at the look of your satisfaction. He continues while his other hand travels to your breast, squeezing it, and you lay your hand upon him while you run your fingers through his hair on the other.

A vibration was going through your body as you felt your climax reaching, “I’m close,” you mention and Rafe stops, “Why’d you stop?” you question him with the disappointment that was clear in your voice.

“I’m not just stopping there.” he laughs softly as he unbuckles his belt.

“Wait,” you pause, “Do you have a condom?”

“If I knew this would happen, I would’ve,” he admits.

“Whatever, I’m on the pill, anyway.” you grab his face and pull him down to your level kissing him again and his tongue enters your mouth.

Rafe started stroking himself as he already was dripping with precum, but you take over by teasing him by palming the tip, and then stroking him as he’s massaging your swollen clit with his hand while you start stroking him faster to tease him back from earlier which caught him by surprise in a good way. “Aw, fuck, just like that,” he catches a glimpse of the way your acrylic nails looked so pretty as you’re stroking him, “I’m paying for your next set just so you know.” He pecks your lips.

“I need you… now.” you whine, and he quickly adjusts himself, “You ready?” he smirks.

“Yes,” you respond, wrapping your legs around his hips.

He starts slow at first so you can get used to it again and wait to give him the okay to go faster. “Tell me if it hurts, it's been a while,” he reassures, and you nod.

Rafe grips your hips as he thrusts in deeper and deeper, “Okay, go faster,” you confirm, and he fastens his pace making your body feel euphoric. His grip on you was so strong, but you were numb to it as the pleasure he was giving you was taking over. “H-harder!” you demand, moaning in his ear.

“Fuck!" he swears in between his moans and lets go of your left hip to put a grip on your neck slightly choking you and looks into your eyes. “God, if only you could see yourself right now, you look and feel so fucking amazing.”

Your smile in pleasure as you dig your nails, leaving scratch marks on his back from how fast and hard, he’s going. Rafe didn’t mind it though, it added to the fun, and it felt good to him as well.

“I-I wanna ride you,” you confess as you’re catching air and Rafe slows down. “Did you say you wanna ride-”

“Yes,” you confidently reply.

Rafe asks again, "Are you sure? You've never done that before, it might hurt."

"But I want to now," you reassure him, and he softly kisses you and happily switches positions with you to do so.

You forget how big he is as you're readjusting yourself until you're comfortable since it's different from your point of view then you ride him slowly to start. “You can take it. I know you can,” he grins.

Rafe squeezes your thighs and your hips then holds on there as you start going faster, he could’ve came right then and there but wanted you to do so first. In his world, you’ll always be his priority.

“Mhmm,” you moan with your eyes rolling back as you feel your g spot being hit perfectly making you moan again so loudly that you were so glad you had the house all to yourself tonight, “Holy fuck! You’re doing so good, beautiful, so good.” Rafe praises you and pulls you into a hug while you’re still riding him, he stuffs his face between your breasts with kisses traveling to your neck and sucking harshly creating more marks, and you’ll look bruised by the end of the night.

At this point, you start seeing stars and feel your high coming, “I’m close!” you cry out.

“So am I, you want me to fill you up, huh?” Rafe teases, “I’ll gladly do so, I’d do anything for you, I promise you that.”

You spill all over him as he fills you up right after which awakens something in you to keep going. Rafe is caught off guard, but it feels so good, “Awh, f-fuck,” he doesn’t want you to stop but his stamina is running out.

“You can take it,” you smile as you mimic the way he teased before and you take his hands to your breasts massaging them.

He whimpers at his overstimulation causing to you smirk, “Come on, I thought you said you wanted to fill me up? You can do it one more time for me, I know you can.” you tease, and once he hears that, he does as you both mentioned feeling the warmth spilling out.

“That was fucking amazing and so were you,” he says as you lay down next to him, catching your breath.

“Back at you,” you kiss him and he grabs to the tissues on your nightstand to get you cleaned up.

Rafe smiles and pulls the sheets up to you both to keep you from getting cold.

“I’m sorry about yesterday, too,” you add, “I guess a lot was going on, it added to the stress.”

“You don’t need to apologize, I’ll always be here when you need anything, even if it’s just my company. I promise.” Rafe reassures, pulling you into his arms.

“Thank you,” your eyes lighting up at him, “I love you, Rafe,”

“I love you more,” he kisses your forehead, “Get some sleep, it was a long night after all.”

You chuckle and close your eyes, feeling safe in his arms.

𝟏:𝟎𝟔 𝐀𝐌

Rafe woke up nearly forgetting where he was but smiled to himself when he saw you still silently asleep in his arms. He looks at the alarm clock on your nightstand and sees the time. It's not as late as he thought it was, but Rafe had a plan before coming over, and that was to get rid of someone or something that stands in the way of your relationship with him. The first one was your best friend, Axel.

It was the perfect night to do as your parents were on a trip with Axel's parents which meant he was also home alone. The adrenaline was rushing through Rafe as he quietly got out of bed trying not to wake you which wasn't much of a problem since you are a heavy sleeper. He gets dressed and makes sure to turn off his phone since he had no intention of bringing it with him and hides his phone in a dresser you have and makes sure to put it on the bottom with clothing on top of it to hide it.

Rafe nearly swears out loud when he remembers he can't go out the front door nor the back doors since your phone and your parent's devices get notifications of the doors opening and closing. Luckily for him, he snuck out through your bedroom window which is the same window you used to use to sneak out of. He successfully made it to his car and drove it down to the destination he needed to be at l, Axel's house.

Arriving at the house but far away enough to not be seen, Rafe remembered about the costume hidden in his trunk, he had a plan. It seemed silly at first to wear one, but he wasn't planning on getting caught, although the thought of recreating one of his favorite movies was exciting to him. Imagining the people, he hates suffering in agony had brought a type of satisfaction to him, but now there was no more imagining it; he was bringing it to life while a life pays for it to be seen by his very own eyes.

There Axel was peacefully painting a new art canvas. He was going to major in art, but why did it have to be the same university as you? That's what Rafe's problem was. His house was built with lots of those types of windows where anyone could easily see anything. Rafe had already put on the black cloak and the mask with a knife ready in his hand and hid where there were no windows then he pulled out a burner phone he had prepared with the voice changer to give Axel a call.

"Hello?"

"What's your favorite scary movie?"

"That's so original, isn't it?"

"If you wanna talk about something original, you're speaking to the original."

"Alright, listen, man, you got the wrong number. Nice impression though, bye–”

"If you hang up on me, I'll smear your own blood on that canvas you were painting!"

Axel's heart drops and looks around the windows outside, but he sees nothing except the pitch-black night.

Rafe laughs at the silence knowing Axel is scared for his life.

"What do you want from me?"

"I'm not asking for much only just your life."

Rafe sees he's next to the electrical panel and cuts the wires making all the power go off.

"Stop fucking with me, man! I'll call the cops."

"Oh, I don't they'd have enough time to get here, you do live in the middle of the woods." Rafe grabs a large heavy rock with his hand, "Besides, you'll be dead by the time they get here." 

Quickly, Rafe throws the rock to a window to distract Axel and runs to the other side where a door with a glass window that he needs to break to unlock the door.

Rafe succeeds in breaking into the house and hears Axel in another room swearing to himself.

"Shit, this can't be happening," Axel shakes as he tries to find something to defend himself with while Rafe is in the kitchen and throws a glass cup to the living across from him where he saw Axel painting earlier just to see if he'll move.

Axel tries to run out the front door but Rafe sneaks up behind by stabbing him in the back and then putting him in a chokehold before he starts stabbing his chest and stomach multiple times making Axel scream in agony, but he fights back throwing himself backward with Rafe to the wall of glass picture frames and making them both fall to the ground as glass shatters everywhere. Rafe quickly gets up and looks down at Axel who struggles to get up by slipping in his own pool of blood. Rafe kneels to him as he watches him suffer in his own agony and waves his knife around.

Rafe starts swinging his knife again but misses and slices the bloody canvas instead when Axel flips over his body to avoid the knife. This angers Rafe even more to which he wipes his knife with his gloves then stabs the knife onto a wooden table, and grabs Axel by the collar of his shirt making him face the mirror then grabs his knife again and points with it. "Take a good fucking look because this is the last thing you'll ever see before you die," Rafe scowls in his normal voice.

"R-Rafe?' Axel struggles to say before Rafe sliced his throat open and is left there to bleed to his death.

#obx rafe cameron #rafe cameron #dark!rafe cameron #toxic!rafecameron #ghostface!rafecameron #rafe x reader #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron smut #rafe cameron x female reader #rafe cameron angst #kook!reader #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe outer banks #rafe x you #rafe smut #rafe obx #rafe x y/n #rafe fanfiction #rafe imagine #outerbanks rafe #obx #outer banks #dark!rafe cameron x reader #toxic!rafexreader #toxic!rafe #ghostface #scream #horror #rafe cameron x kook!reader #rafe cameron x smut

[urhoneycombwitch]

in sickness, to cherish

foreword: so excited to release this lil’ babe into the world. PTSD and trauma healing is of special interest to me, I hope you enjoy 💖 (p.s. from my limited research I don’t think they would have used a heart monitor for low-risk patients but it is literally integral to my plot so I’m breaking my anachronistic purity rule. soz)

wc: 3k

cw: descriptions of seizure, PTSD + hospital/medical trauma for the whole gang, brief mention of non-consensual drugging, R is referred to once as “Mrs” & “girlfriend”, angst w/ comfort

___

The mounted clock on the wall of the dingy Hawkins Memorial waiting room ticks over to nine PM, a brutal reminder that time (for everyone else, at least) has not, in fact, stopped.

Nine o’clock. As you pace from one end of the plastic chair-lined aisle to the other, you run the numbers in your head, fingers spastic at your sides- it’s nine right now, and Steve was admitted just after six, which means they’ve been running tests for three hours, even though the charge nurse said it should only take one…

”You wanna step outside for a smoke?”

Eddie speaks up from his seat at the end of the row, catching your bleary gaze before you’re turning on your heel again to complete your looping track.

His voice cuts smoothly over the buzzing fluorescents, the old television in the corner droning with last week’s news cycle; it’s enough to disrupt Robin from her half-sleep against Eddie’s shoulder, blinking into consciousness and stretching her stiff limbs as you respond.

“No, thanks.” Your hands slip to the inside of your elbows, squeezing through layers of soft cardigan in a near-bruise, feet continuing the rhythmic pacing. “You can go, though- I’ll make sure Robin comes to get you if anything happens.”

Eddie clears his throat, sinking back into the hard plastic, rings clicking at the armrests. “Nah, I’m good without one. Just thought you’d want a change of scenery, maybe some fresh air would calm-”

“I’m staying here.”

There’s a sharpness to your voice, a rarity- Robin winces, fingers in her lap twisting and fidgeting as she tries to change the subject. “God, Steve’s gonna be spitting mad when he wakes up. He’s the most doctor-adverse person I know.”

Eddie latches on to this with a humorless chuckle- “Stubborn bastard. Wouldn’t let those lab goons go near him, even after last year-”

“Fuck.” The swear comes from the bottom of your toes, even as you swivel on the balls of your feet to loop back in front of your friends; their faces snap to you, a blur of motion as you pass them again- “You’re right. Steve fucking hates doctors. I should’ve-”

Your next breath comes stilted, fingers a vice-grip on your own arms as you pace, pace, pace- “I should’ve treated this like taking a dog to a vet. Crushed up some pills in his food, or something- he never listens to me when I nag him about his hearing getting worse- do you know how many meals, how many glasses of water we share, every day?”

From the corner of your hazy vision, Robin’s gone still and pale, her voice tremulous- “I didn’t mean to imply- this isn’t your fault, you know-”

But you’re not ready to hear that, guilt surfacing like a sick wave, tears pooling, moments away from spilling over, voice trembling with anguish- “Could’ve been so easy, tell him we’re going for a ride, load him up into the passenger seat, he goes to sleep and I could’a passed him right off to a doctor, to someone who could have prevented this-”

Eddie rises from his seat to stand in the middle of your path, hands lifting to soothe and appease, but you’re still in flight mode, like a bird beating its wings against the confines of its cage.

You flinch away from his touch, standing with your back turned to them both, staring out the dark window, unseeing. “You know what Steve said to me? Right before he hit the ground? He said, ‘Don’t panic, I’m gonna pass out, try not to let my hair get too messed up.’”

An edge of misplaced humor draws a dry laugh from your throat. The dark window reflects your own face back- tear-streaked, red veins encroaching on the whites of your eyes- as you shake your head in disbelief. “He made a joke. To try and distract me from the fact that he was about to hit the ground and go all… all spastic-”

Unbidden flashes of memory surge to the forefront of your mind: victims of last spring. Twisted forms snapped at the bone, Max’s arms and legs bent at horrifying angles, plaster casts from head-to-toe, freckled face still and sallow against the starch-white hospital sheets-

A leather-jacketed form in the reflection behind you, Eddie’s hand solid on your back against the shuddering breaths wracking all the air from your lungs. You don’t flinch away this time.

Your beautiful boy. Steve. With his eye-crinkling smiles and sharp wit and gentle heart, stiff as a board in the middle of your living room, eyes rolled back in his skull like a downed deer, unreachable, just three hours ago.

“I thought it was Vecna. It’s been so long but I thought he’d come back, somehow, I was this close to running upstairs and grabbing our Walkman-”

”But you didn’t.” The hand at your back is joined by another at your arm as Eddie pulls you to face him, his gaze locking on your own, brown eyes full of grave compassion. “You heard the nurse. She said tipping him on his side was the best call you could’a made, sweetheart- you saved him.”

”But I didn’t know,” you insist, “I didn’t know that’s what would help, I just did it ‘cuz I was worried he was going to choke on his own tongue-”

“Semantics. You intuited it, then.” One of Eddie’s hands leaves your arm briefly to make a dismissive gesture through the air- “Which, in my book, is all the more impressive.”

Unconvinced, your voice small and tightening along with your chest- “What if this happens again, and he’s alone, this time? What if he’s working one of his three closing shifts a week, without Robin- what if he’s driving?”

You can’t help the spiraling of your thoughts, what-if scenarios jumping in line, each one more horrifying than the last.

Robin rises to stand beside Eddie, opens her mouth- to deny, to comfort, it’s unclear- but is interrupted by a new nurse who’s just appeared in the doorway.

“Mrs. Harrington?”

This snaps you back to earth, a bit, another watery laugh as Eddie takes a step back, allowing you to swipe at the mess of tears on your face before turning to the nurse- “Yeah. As good as, I guess. How’s he doing?”

With a last look at your friends, the nurse leads you down sickeningly-bright corridors while reading from a clipboard- most of it’s medical jargon, your foggy brain struggling to keep up as you stay on her heels.

What you gather, as you’re led to his room, is nothing new- Steve’s had a seizure, likely due to the trauma his brain incurred from the ‘earthquake’ of ‘86, and it’s unclear what triggered it, or if it’s likely to happen again.

“We’re going to keep him overnight, just to monitor his condition.” The nurse stops at a door labeled Room 202, hinges squeaking as she pushes it open. “He was really lucky, this time. Must’ve had a good guardian angel looking out for him.”

Heart thrumming thick in your throat, you almost ask the nurse to wait, to give you a second- maybe a quick bathroom break to splash some cold water against the tear-tracks, or even an extra few seconds to pretend at being stoic- but she’s already ushering you in with a kind smile.

The nurse pulls the door shut, and you’re left alone with the boy in the bed.

He looks exhausted, dark circles pulling at the soft skin below his eyes, which are full of relief, trained on you as you approach.

“Hey, there’s my girl.” There’s a scratchy quality to Steve’s voice, on its way to being lost.

You were doing really well, no crying or anything, before he spoke. But hearing him, paired with the awful sight of a medical cord wrapping around the width of his broad chest, has your face crumpling in an instant.

“Oh, shit. Aw, honey. C’mere-” Steve reaches for you, halfway to sitting up off his supporting pillows, and you quickly close the gap, sitting near his hip on the bed.

“No, hey- stay down,” you chide through the tears, pushing at the shoulder of his white hospital tee. “Don’t put any stress on your body.”

“Cut the stress, she says,” Steve grumbles, leaning back against the stack of pillows but compromising by pulling you in closer. “My baby’s crying, and she tells me no stress?”

His left palm slips over your cheek, thumb swiping away tears, while his right hand- IV taped flat over the back of it- slides to rest on your waist.

”Gonna tell me what’s wrong, hm?”

Under different circumstances, you’d laugh at his question- christ, where did he want you to start: but with that amber gaze so full of empathy, desperate to fix what’s making you sad, you’re stripped raw with sincerity.

”I was just- I was so scared, Steve-”

Steve pulls your face towards his, needily, a breath away from begging for a kiss before you lean in for one.

He tastes salty, like sweat and tears, lips plush and softly seeking against the seam of your own. Between the kisses, he’s mumbling apologies, “sorry, so sorry”, broken by the need to be as close to you as all the medical gear will allow.

There’s a soft noise from the back of his throat, and you pull away just enough to bump your nose into his, hands running up to push through the soft strands of his hair.

Steve practically purrs under your touch; you’re careful not to disturb the tubing wrapping around the length of his chest, leaning your weight into his shoulders instead.

A vein of hilarity spikes as you remember Steve’s last words before he went under: and here you were, fingers pulling at his dark roots, breaking his one request. When you start to giggle, Steve’s eyes pop open, baffled, hair sticking up at the ends when your fingers leave his hair. Both hands now squeezing at your hips, he feels left out of the joke- “What?”

“I just- nothing. Never mind. I’m really glad you’re okay.” It’s the truth. You frame his lovely face with your hands, kissing his forehead once before sitting up fully. “I don’t wanna fight about it here, okay? Let’s just focus on you feeling better, and then-”

“See, now, wait a minute-” Steve holds up a finger to interrupt. “You don’t get it. I’ve been hoping and praying for hours now that my pretty girlfriend would come in here just so we could have a good fight.”

He tweaks at the skin of your hips (with the IV-hand, so you can’t just smack it away, dammit), smiling up at you far too dreamily for someone reclining in a hospital bed.

Settling against the length of Steve’s torso, your arms cross over his stomach just under the tubing as you start, carefully- “You know, Max had one of these- when she was in the hospital?”

”Yeah, you’re right.” Steve’s hands worm their way under both your cardigan sleeves, seeking out the comfort of skin like a magnet- “Think it tracks heart rate. Or something.”

“Mm-hm. And… you know how she had to go to physical therapy three times a week? For, like, half the school year?”

Steve’s thumbs swipe absently at your wrists, a line pinched between his brows, trying to piece together your angle. “…yeah?”

“Takes a lot of time, to heal from something like that.” Your eyes drop to his chest, throat swelling with the effort of holding back a sob. “And I’m just- just thinking of all the times you might be alone, and how we could have prevented this, and-”

“Hey, hey, hey- shhh…” Steve soothes, shaking his head. “Honey, it was inevitable, okay? Nothing we could’a done. The doc told me this shit can happen, like, years after a big event. I’m fine. I’ll be fine. I promise.”

Fighting against the wall of emotion that makes speaking harder, you return his head shake, desperate for understanding- “But you can’t promise that, baby. You had a seizure- an actual, medical emergency, and… we don’t know if it’ll happen again.”

With a purposeful straightening of your spine, you state, resolutely: “I want a different promise.”

Steve presses the crown of his head back into the pillows, melodramatic, resurfacing with a tsk. “So stubborn. What promise you want, then, huh?”

”I want you to promise that you’ll see a doctor- a real one. A head guy. Not some… family medicine quack.”

Steve grins, charming even while unusually pale- “I love it when you talk medical, really gets me going-”

He decides to bail on the rest of that sentence when he sees the flare of irritation on its way to real anger in your face, raising both hands in appeasement- “Okay. Hey- I promise to see a real head doc. I don’t intend on putting you through this again.”

WIth a sigh, you surge forward again, mumbling “Thank you” into Steve’s lips, a kiss of relief and gratitude. Best news you’ve heard all day.

His groans vibrate through you, hands running down the length of your side, near the bottom of your cardigan; you squeak at the intrusion of his cold palms on the bare skin of your waist but they warm quickly, and you’re willingly distracted as his tongue presses against the seam of your lips.

Perhaps not exactly hospital-appropriate, but as it’s been an evening full of adrenaline-filled panic and heartache, you figure some making out might be a good cure for the both of you.

“Won’t scare you like that again,” Steve says, lips already pink and spit-slick, intense and breathless as he clings to you between kisses- “Gonna be okay. You saved me, angel. Love you s’much…”

Your hand, previously resting on Steve’s knee, automatically slides up at his words, notching into the soft expanse of his inner thigh over the thin sheets- “Love you too, so much…”

A bright, electronic noise jolts into frantic beeping- the monitor that Steve’s hooked up to is loud enough to startle you into sitting up.

There’s no time to process or even rearrange yourselves before the nurse from earlier bustles into the room to glare at the machine’s screen; best you can do is a swipe across your mouth, hopefully hiding any evidence of moments-ago spit-swappage as you stammer out, “Um, yeah, sorry- h-he was trying to sit up and that set it off, I guess…?”

Steve lies placid and amenable against his pillows, giving the nurse a gold-medal grin, which unfortunately does nothing to allay her suspicions.

“Uh-huh.” The monitor alarm is stopped short with the press of a few buttons, and she gives Steve a sideways look, clipboard tucked under her arm- “You ready for your other visitors, Mr. Harrington, or should I give you a few more minutes?”

“Bring forth the party, Patricia.” Steve folds his hands behind his head, wincing when his IV gets bumped but covering it with a wink.

Nurse Patricia leaves. You cover your heated face, mortified- “Oh my god. She probably thought I was giving you a handjob or something, jesus, Steve-”

He’s outright laughing at you now, unable to help it- “Come on, no she didn’t. And even if she did…”

Steve is momentarily distracted, frowning down at his chest, following the monitor’s line to the machine; you watch through cracked fingers, his face lighting up, triumphant. “See, I bet if we unplug it from the wall same time as disconnecting it from here, we might be able to fit a handy under the radar, after all!”

Robin and Eddie enter the room just as you’re swatting Steve’s shoulder; over your subdued and mildly horrified laughter, he groans in faux-pain: “God, you two got here just in time. She’s beating me up for no reason.”

As Eddie settles into the plastic chair under the opposing wall’s window, you scooch down the mattress, patting the side closest to Steve with an encouraging smile at Robin.

She takes the seat, appreciative, her clammy hand slipping into yours for support as she addresses Steve: “Y’know, if you did this to get out of doing inventory this weekend, you could just say so.”

“You caught me, Robs,” Steve says, thumbing over her knuckles fondly. “Finally gonna join my conspiracy to make Keith’s life hell?”

You’re about to cut in, emphasizing that no one else should be making any hospital visits, when a metallic screech has the three of you on the bed whipping around.

Eddie’s managed to crack the barred window- judging by the sound, it hasn’t been opened since the 70s. He freezes with all the attention, then speaks around the cigarette clenched between his lips, suave again- “Pardon the interruption. Anyone else care for a smoke?”

Everyone in the room blinks at him, in various stages of disbelief; Steve starts laughing, first, which gets Robin going, and eventually you, too, until Eddie’s grinning around the cigarette, lighter halfway to his mouth as he chuckles- “Well, can’t say I didn’t offer…”

Robin makes a comment about nicotine fumes, which quickly devolves into her and Eddie fiercely bickering.

The elevated chatter of your friends fades into the background as Steve takes your hand atop the sheets, head tilted to get you in his line of sight again- love you, he mouths.

Love you, too.

#steve harrington #steve harrington fic #steve harrington x reader

[rosezza]

Give up on me

—R

— i love you till my breathing stops.

Warnings: soft!rafe, crying, strong language, no happy ending. I honestly love dark Rafe much more but

"What the fuck! Is wrong! With you?!" You yelled as cold tears streamed down your makeup smeared face. Sobs coming from you as you stared at Rafe.

The secret that yours and Rafes relationship was only a bet had came out to you. Over a year of dating had all been a lie. And it hurt you. All those mornings he had you wrapped close to him as he kissed you all over your face was a lie. All the times he had said he loved you was a lie. All the things you and Rafe every shared was a lie. And it cut you deep. Your throat tightened as you watched Rafe with blurry eyes. Your heart ached and your stomach was twisting. You loved him, you really did. And it hurt to know that he never loved you back. Your mind going through all the small things you and Rafe had experienced only hurt even more.

"Y/n please-.. Listen to me i didnt- i-" Rafe tried as he locked eyes with you. His heart shattered as he saw your tears. Especially since he was the one that caused them to fall down your pretty face. He had promised to make sure whoever made you cry never placed a hand on you ever again. And now he was the one making you cry.

"No!- no! Dont even fucking talk to me Rafe!.." you cried as you began sobbing even more. His soft voice reminded you of the sweet things he said to you. And it hurt you even more.

Rafe stood there as his anexiety creeped up. He was scared to say something wrong and he didnt want to lose you. He never wanted to. It was all a bet yes. But he had fallen inlove with you. And it was something he couldnt let go of, he thought he was unlovable. No girl had ever showed him as much love as you did. You had understood him in different ways then his past relationships ever had. He had actually managed to think of a future with you. And it destroyed him to think that all if that could possibly end now. You were the first girl he actually cared about and respected.

He was always the tough guy, always the one who was in control. But to you he was different. Only to you. And he had grown attached to you.

But you didnt know that.

You were stuck thinking he never cared about you. And it wouldnt even be a surprise considering you got with Rafe Cameron. Everyone had warned you about him but you gave him a chance.

And you actually thought he was the right one. The way he held you, the way he kissed you, the way he tied your shoes even if you were out in public, the way he took care of you, the way you danced to stupid little tunes whenever you felt like it, the way he bought you flowers, The way he loved you

Your anger just turned into complete sadness as you realised that this was it. This was the end "I should have listened when people told me.." you cried. Your voice high pitched because of the way your throat was tightened.

"I spoke to my mother about you Rafe, i told everyone that i found the right one. I was so fucking stupid werent i? Because all you are after is a slut." You cried as you pointed a finger at Rafe. Which hit a soft spot in him. His eyes began tearing up as he watched this whole situation unfold right infront of him. The person he loved and truly wanted in his life was sad because of him.

"Y/n I love you.." Rafes voice was weak and he took a step closer to you. The tears in his eyes made you feel slightly bad but you couldnt give in to him again. Not now. Not anymore.

"Stop saying that when you dont!-" you cried out again. You had a lump in your throat and you felt lightheaded. You hated this and you just wanted to go away.

"I give up on you"

Your words hit him like a thousand bricks at once as you snatched up your bag from the counter. Rafe was speechless as you began to walk towards the door. "No-.. no, no no. Y/n!-" Rafe called out with desperation and guilt in his voice, finally acting. He didnt want this to end. He never did. A tear ran down his cheek as he caught up to you before you could leave. He took a hold on your arm but you quickly pulled away and turned to him. Looking in his eyes. Both of your eyes red because of the tears that were both plastered on your faces.

"Never fucking touch me again." You sneered at him and his eyebrows frowned. He didnt want this. He wanted you in his arms again, but the chances if that completely faded as you began walking away from his house. Leaving him heartbroken at the doorframe. Guilt washed over him. Regretting that he ever agreed on that bet. Thinking about how different things would have been if you didnt find out you were a bet.

You heard his cries as you walked. A part of you wanted to turn around and run to him, hug him and tell him its going to be alright. Because a part of you still loved him. You could never stop loving him because you once showed the love you had for him. But all of that was gone. Your future with him was over. Your heart ached. It wanted to re-connect with his. But it hurt you to know this wasnt real.

You had given up on him. Forever.

Taglist: @necroflame 💗💗

#rafe x reader #rafe fanfiction #outer banks #drew starkey #rafe cameron #rafe outer banks #fanfic #rafe obx

[onyourhyuck]

LOWLIFE. | L.DH | PART 4

— Prologue: “It’s simple, Y/n.” He leans in his lips inches away from your face. “You don’t want to tell me the truth then we’ll have to go through this the hard way.” He smirks and pushed you even more against the wall. “Until you cry…” His voice was soft suddenly as if he was sweet talking you right now but you knew deep down he meant every word.

— Summary: Where your childhood enemy found your diary one day where you wrote all your dirty thoughts about Lee fucking Haechan.

— Genre: Smut. Dub-con. Stalker Haechan. Haechan’s the biggest red flag. Everything is consensual but it’s very dark here. Haechan’s very mean and he doesn’t care a lot. Hair pulling. Dominant Haechan. Pussy slapping. Overstimulation play. Degradation. Slight praise. Jealous and possessive Haechan. Y/n is a masochist. Haechan’s very much the sadist here. Mention of Jaehyun. Mention of Diary. Blackmailing.

— Notes: I am so sorry this took so long to publish. I am on holiday 😭 I have a lot of work to publish still oml.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Its been weeks since you and Donghyuck made contact in any form. There was no life between the two of you. For some reason you couldn’t face Donghyuck not after what you guys did. Usually you would be okay the next with seeing Donghyuck pretending like nothing happened but not after this one. The situation that went in hand was something else. Not only did he get upset with you. He also said things that made you think a lot.

Made you realise that you might be in this one sided situation all along with feelings that are becoming unhealthy. Whenever your classes were mixing the both of you together neither of you spoke but it seems like you were avoiding him more than he was. At least he made some eye contact with you in some moments when he was talking to you, but you completely aired him and that could only cause him to be taken aback by your actions. Your presence usually was very much attached to him like a hard glue and now you’re a floating water who doesn’t even acknowledge him. What’s happened to you? Donghyuck was left becoming slightly confused and less by the minute he grew upset that you’re the one who’s ignoring him.

Everyone knows that Donghyuck was the one leading you on, even his two friends, Jeno and Jaemin knew he was simply using you. But now that you seem to have a mind of your own, you’re no longer under his command and control it seems like you broke out and you don’t want to have this one-sided thing anymore. Not even the diary makes you feel like you’re threatened by his blackmail. And so Donghyuck was the one feeling gruntingly attacked and frustrated by you and your actions.

It is ironic in a way, you were the one chasing him all those years trying to be his friend, trying to show your love and adoration for him and when he never gave a second thought about it, you disappeared from that view of being a crazy obsessed little girl now. You’re no longer that person, or at least you’re trying to move on from him and his toxic ways. Now Donghyuck feels compelled to chase you without a single thought running in that head of his. It made him think that perhaps he went too far with you? Maybe he did something you didn’t like and that leaves a sour taste and smell in his mouth just by thinking about that. He doesn’t even know why he was worried if he did something that you weren’t comfortable with.

It’s not like he cared before, so why should he care now? Donghyuck really wasn’t understanding himself and his stupid thoughts. He only had you on his brain nowadays ever since you keep on avoiding and dodging him wherever he goes. Even if he purposely tried to cross paths with you somehow, you turn your back to him and go the other way. What kind of person does that?

He feels some type of hatred for you, but not the hatred you’re thinking. He hates that you’re making him feel this many things he shouldn’t even be feeling. Was this guilt? Was this some sort of joke you’re doing this to him? He feels hurt. Donghyuck had never been the type of guy to feel bothered when he’s ignored he goes about his day and thinks it is what it is.

But when you’re doing this it’s difficult. He can’t move past this, so he wants to do something about it.

You’re listening to music as you’re walking past the school corridors now. You wore your usual school uniform and your hair was in a little low bun today. You could’ve be bothered doing a fancy hairstyle today and leaving it down wasn’t really fitting your mood right now so you decided to do an up do and just go about your day, move on, and as you’re listening to your playlist you go on the phone to press shuffle so another song can play on your headphones; as your fingers gently click the screen, you feel yourself bump shoulders with someone and your eyes widen as you look at the tall figure. He was handsomely dressed neatly and he looks very smart and kind. He had light coloured hair and pale skin, he looks like an upperclassman.

Your eyes widen ever so lightly realising you bumped into him and you grew embarrassed so you only bow your head ready to say something complicated because your voice was coming out like a stuttering mess. “I’m s-so sorry oh my god are you okay? You’re not hurt right…” your voice trails off at the end going quiet because you’re busy checking for any signs of injuries the older boy might have, but he lets out a soft chuckle and shakes his head.

You can’t change the feeling of being validated because the boy was asking how are you, he was quite bigger than you, and he was worried you might’ve broke your shoulder or something which he didn’t want happening.

“It’s okay, no worries, really.” He said and then looks at you up and down checking your body from just a little moment to check for any injuries too. “You’re not hurt right? I can take you to the nurse infirmary if you’d like.” He offers gently and you can’t help but smile ear to ear. No one has ever been this kind to you and even offered to take you to the nurse to get you checked out. He seems very polite— and gentlemen like. You somehow feel your heart skipping many beats at the handsome boy.

The boy can’t help but feel like your smile was surpassingly cute. You seem like a young innocent girl who doesn’t have many friends but he liked that considering you were so kind and emphatic. He likes your attitude especially how kindly you’re giving your time to check on him too.

You look down at your body and give him a soft approving nod. “I’m fine. Good as new still.” You tell him and he was quite happy about that. “What’s your name? I don’t think I’ve recognised you.” He was a senior so it’s quite known for him to know other juniors in the school however he has never ran into you and that’s probably because you prefer being a shadow. You don’t really like speaking to people in school, unless you have to. You don’t really like interacting if you’re being honest.

You’re always the quiet girl and you don’t mind that. You prefer it being that way since it’s easier to be quiet than to deal with people all the time. You learned that the hard way. Nonetheless Jaehyun seems pretty cool and you can’t help but feel yourself introducing to him.

“Y/n. I’m in Class 3E…” You murmur as you turn your eyes around the class door number in the distance and Jaehyun lets out a soft ‘ahhh’ as he now knows you’re a junior. His junior more like. “It’s nice to meet you Y/n. You’ve got a pretty name. I’m Jung Jaehyun.” His hand comes forward and you stare at it for a moment and you can’t help but smile if anything you were smitten over Jaehyun’s friendly demure he makes you feel safe.

And it certainly boosted up your low and tired mood. You shake his hand softly and then the hands let go unattaching themselves as they share a momentarily contact. Jaehyun smiles. “Y/n do you want to exchange socials? I think we get along quite well.” He beams and your face grew red with blush.

He wants to exchange your socials? He really said he wants to get to know you more and you’re just so bewildered. No one has ever asked for your socials before.

“I- oh yes okay, we can exchange socials I’d love to.” You say to him quickly as he was waiting for your time you seemed to be dazed in a way and he found that pausing reaction to be the cutest. So now your socials were exchanged when Jaehyun added your account and he smiles proudly. He was glad you wanted to give him your hand.

It just makes his heart ponder. You were very cute and you seem quite friendly and upbeat. Not many juniors he meets are like you. So he thought this might be fate he bumped into you today. You really cheered up his mood a lot.

And he cheered up your mood too it seems.

From the far on end distance would stand Donghyuck with a very glaring and dark expression almost like a dark cloud was over his head raining down on him and striking a blighted lighting down angrily. Hands tucked in front pockets as you and Jaehyun were walking now side by side and speaking. The way he hears your echoing laugh really bugs him and he wants to make it stop. Why was this bothering him so much more? He can understand you if you’re ignoring him and not speaking to anyone but if you’re ignoring him and now SPEAKING to someone he feels completely burned down like he was on fire, bathing in his anger.

Jaemin whistles as he knew his friends was enraged to the fullest and he enjoys seeing Donghyuck so upset. He told him before, that you were a keeper and you were only going to keep attracting men towards yourself. Because let’s be honest here, Jaemin and the other boys found you extremely pretty but you’re also very rare. You look innocent, you have this very doe-like energy about you, but deep down you’re nothing like that and that’s exactly what makes people like them so interested in you. They like that you’re coming out with two different sides to yourself.

He sighs patting Donghyuck’s shoulder. “Wow you got dumped by your pet.” The boy glared at his friend and slapped his hand away. “I didn’t get dumped.” He retorts back with a emphasised hiss. “She will come back crying to me. Watch her do that.” He said trying to be convincing but now it’s been a few days almost a week since you’ve been avoiding him; Jaemin and Jeno were really set on the idea that you’re not gonna come back anytime soon.

However his friends would not mention anything back and instead let Donghyuck huff in his own anger boiling over like an overflowing bathtub full of scorching water. He feels so much pressure in his head the fact you’re speaking to other guys as well now but you’re not speaking to him? It just hurts him knowing you’re not in his control and now all he wants is to have you back, being devoted to him.

“I will make you regret this Y/n.” He told himself. He vows to make you come back on your knees begging for forgiveness to spare you some if he can find any.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

You’re walking down the street not doing particularly much except being on your phone scrolling. You press on the Spotify icon and play your playlist that you spend your dedicated time making for yourself whenever you leave the house or go to school. You can’t go anywhere without listening to music, it’s like your life is based on around this playlist everywhere you go now and you’re not complaining. You have quite good music taste. Nonetheless you now make your way looking over the streets seeing cars driving past. It seems to be a traffic today. It’s raining quite badly too, it’s been gloomy these past days, you can’t help but think it’s to do with your mood too. Because now the weather is depressed and ever since you stopped communicating with Donghyuck, avoiding him at all costs, the weather goes sour. You try not to paint these coincidences to your situation. It might make you even more hung up on the idea that your silent treatment is too far. But you can’t just ignore what he said to you.

The words haunt you forever, even till now this day every night you’re hearing him repeat it to you like a religious mantra you couldn’t push out your brain. “You’re nothing but entertainment for me you do know that? The only reason I’m keeping you around is for your body.” He said those words to you, those horrible words that share nothing but your grief and your own one sided thoughts out down the drain. You wouldn’t believe him at first but you cannot shake the feeling these words have you.

You try your best to move on. But it’s like half of his heart is yours nowadays you feel not alive without him. You try to tell yourself time is the best healer, you need time apart, you need to move on and forget him already.

At least that’s your plan.

You break your own thoughts overtaking your reality and when you bring yourself forward snapping out of all overthinking you do you realise a car honking at you all this time. You look at them with a nervous apologetic smile and cross the road. They seemed quite upset with you, you didn’t realise they were making time to have you cross over, you got stuck in your own head: again. You want to sigh how much your own thoughts were drugged by this situation. You try not to think anymore. It’s bad enough that you stood there keeping a car waiting for you to snap back to the real moment.

Crossed over now, you walk down the another long road leading the neighbourhood opening. You see a bunch of houses similar to yours. The neighbourhood is quite similar in all designs the house provide. You couldn’t help but shake the feeling of the rain dropping down on your forehead now, against your glasses. You curse and take your glasses off wiping the water droppings by the hem of your sweater. “Great it’s raining…” you mutter at the horrible weather. You decide to put your bag over your head and start walking in the rain. Your school uniform wasn’t warm enough for this bad weather.

It’s meant to be near-summer why is it so rainy? You beg the rain stops but it seems to be getting worse now and you couldn’t help but wonder if this was some sort of accident happening to you. You listen to the heavy racket the rain makes against your cute leather backpack you bring to school, it was heavy and it starts to rattle like a glass on top of a washing machine when it’s washing a bunch of clothes in circulation.

The wind was blowing hard working with the ridiculous weather conditions. You swore the forecast is never correct. You start to think there is no point watching it if it is never correct about the weather throughout the day.

The downpour was so heavy that to be caught by surprise by it meant being drenched to the skin. Soaking every fabric to the skin like it was a piece parting of your body. Every droplet of water coming down on your beautiful hair submerges to your roots, wetting it, curling every strand of hair up. The gravity was thick and the petrichor smell of the rain surrounding the trees and the flowers fills your nostrils like the heavenly earth filling the air. The weather was a rollercoaster you couldn’t ride without the risk of becoming drowned into the ocean like a tsunami engulfs everything in the same way. It was so bad that you have no choice but to continue walking and accept this weather to your forsaken day and deal with it. You had to suck it up, and pray you don’t get sick in the process. You can’t help but admire how the cars driving on the road wipe the windowsill while they drive, or the houses getting wet and dirty by the heavy rainstorm.

The eerie feeling brushes down your spine. It’s like someone was watching you now that you made your way further you see your house nearby but now the, the moment your hips turn round to your side of the neighbourhood you live at. You feel two pairs of eyes on you. It was a weird thought that ran to your head. Why do you feel like you’re being followed?

It might be your paranoia, because it’s raining, today was a bad day. You feel quite gloomy too.

But the feeling was too strong to ignore. You turn around and look around the distance. You see zero people and a few cars driving past the road down. You don’t see anyone, but you swore you felt someone behind you watching you specifically. Maybe you felt like you were followed from the start but now you’re starting to grasp that.

You feel your throat going dry. “It’s probably nothing…” you whisper checking around with your eyes again just to out some reassurance to yourself.

Your feet turn around the heels and now your eyes widen as you were met with a dark gaze, a taller boy towering over you completely and you feel your skin growing deathly pale. Why have your legs gone completely numb at the sight of the boy you dread and love at the same time? Why was your brain half flight have fight? And why was your lips open wide but nothing coming out?

It turns out the creepy feeling of being stalked wasn’t so untrue afterall. You were followed all along by Donghyuck. From the moment school has ended he’s been travelling in your shadows and you were a fool to not even realise until your eyes took the surroundings in. Donghyuck knew you wouldn’t be able to notice him because of your earbuds in and that music of yours kept you busy for half a while. It’s a shame though, your priceless reaction wasn’t enough for him. Usually your silence was something he encourages.

But not today. Today he wants to hear you very much scream.

Donghyuck standing with a dark hood up covering most of his face but from where you stood and where your height was at you could see the dark grey cold eyes of his gazing into yours like it was your last warning. You might need a miracle to escape him now, you think to yourself. The feeling of your stomach turning and getting a cramp drags your senses to heighten maximum. He leans down whispering, crowing at your dumbfounded eyes and mouth wide agape like you were so shocked to see him standing right there in front of you. “What’s wrong Specs, got no where to run off to now?” Donghyuck mocks you down right back to your knees.

Your eyebrows rose at each insult he throws at you and you fiddle with your fingertips, the heavy rain covers your palms that dropped to your sides and your feet stopped working. You try to make yourself run, you try to do anything but you couldn’t do anything even if you tried your body stopped functioning. You wonder if it’s fear or if it’s excitement.

“D-Donghyuck… what are you… did you follow me h-here?” You want to curse. You want to be told to get your shit together but you can’t.

The sound of your voice aroused Donghyuck with the most intense and propounding cruelty to do to you. It’s the way your sweet voice breaks half way each word. You drag on your words at emphasis of your own fear he injects inside your body. Donghyuck very much loves the effect he has on you by just standing in front of your eye sight view. He wonders, if you get so stuck by watching him, what will you be like when he gets his hands on you finally after so freaking long?

You’ve been ignoring him for too long. Donghyuck wants to teach you a lesson on what happens when you ignore him. And it’s not going to be a very kind lesson. He ran out of kindness for you a while ago. “Clever girl.” He said, even though it’s a praise, it was a condescending comment that wasn’t a true meaningful compliment to you. Donghyuck trails forward grabbing your wrist that’s soaking with the rain, letting drops of rain on the ground by your cold and red fingertips. He spoke with a devilish smile. “I believe we have things to discuss, Y/n.”

You’re about to protest but the minute he saw you getting ready to say many things along the lines of saying no to him he just starts dragging you without giving you any chance to reject this moment away. Donghyuck can’t handle another moment of you ignoring him and he’s about to show you why you can’t do this to him. He was meant to be the sole reason of your affection and obsession, and he won’t let some stupid senior in upper class take that away from him.

You are meant to be his and only his. Donghyuck doesn’t like sharing what is his with someone who be doesn’t like. And even if he liked Jaehyun a little bit he wouldn’t of given you to someone like him anyways.

Usually Donghyuck wouldn’t be like this with you. He could care less about who you get and speak with. But now it’s different. Something within him changed and the boy was no longer something you could understand, he can’t even understand himself. You found yourself getting pushed inside Donghyuck’s front door to his house which wasn’t too far away from your neighbourhood. Either way you didn’t want to be in his house. The last time you were here you did things you want to forget. It just makes your stomach remember the things you guy do. The things he did to your body which is hard to forget.

You turn to the door that shut when he walks inside closing it behind. You gulp taking a step backwards. The both of you are soaked from your head to toes. Donghyuck can see your wet eyelashes, he found them more beautiful than before, and it was angering him that he was admiring your face that he couldn’t even see due to you ignoring him so long. It felt like a relief washed over his body when he finally saw your face. He found it more beautiful than last time. Maybe you were always this beautiful, but he never quite took notice until now.

And it’s killing him. He’s viewing you differently.

Donghyuck doesn’t understand where it all changed. When it all changed. Why it all changed.

“Donghyuck I don’t want to… I don’t want to speak to you.” You finally tell him when the courage in your heart and body was found. You’re even surprised you have the guts to tell Donghyuck this. What surprised you even more is that the boy wasn’t responding. Was he admiring you? You thought it was strange how quiet he is while facing you with a different pair of eyes watching you from another point of view low. You can’t help and shake this weird change.

Nonetheless you were now pressed against a wall with your wet clothes. The school backpack belonging to you fell somewhere on the ground. It was wet, every part of you was wet actually and his face shivering from how cold your bodies were when the rain was pouring down outside on you. “I think you’re lying Y/n.” Donghyuck spoke in a very low but soft voice as his hand caressed down your jawline and to your chin. You pull your face away trying to escape all those little touches he does to try and hypnotise you.

You feel his hot breath and low voice so irresistible to you that it is hard to ignore. You’re surprised you have even this much restrain in yourself because you feel quite weak whenever it comes to him. Even Donghyuck was now amused by your response. It is very different now. He’s enjoying your playing hard to get persona now.

He smirks seeing you completely dodge the touch his hands made against your soft beautiful skin on your face. “You don’t need to lie to me… let’s stop this push and pull game alright, before it gets messy.” He warns you deeply now.

Although Donghyuck was using his sweet voice on you. You feel so crushed by this and you narrow your eyes at the boy in front of you. He was like a shadow in front of you. So unpredictable. So untouchable and absolutely maddening to you and your self consciousness.

He poisons you and every right decision. He makes you do the wrong choices but they feel so right all the time. You can’t shake this feeling when you’re feeling your cherish able heart beat to every thing Donghyuck does to you. It’s like your heart feels so much more alive, when you are around him.

You feel your teeth stick together as you spoke out to him once again, you heard him say this, that you’re lying about not wanting to speak to him. He wasn’t wrong. But you can’t do this cycle with him, the words he said to you haunt the back of your mind up until now. “I am not lying, Donghyuck, I don’t want to speak to you.” You tell the boy in front of you. Donghyuck let’s out a quiet low snicker. “Oh yeah?” He said leaning down to your face. He can see a reflection of himself become enlarge in your wet glasses.

He gentle smirks. He found this new side of you to be quite entertaining. Donghyuck can’t help but think he’s going to have fun getting the truth out of you now. “I guess we will be here for a while now.” You heard him suggest.

“What?” Your innocent voice lets out quietly in the silence and dark hallway as your back is pressing on like a cement statue browsing on the wall against it while Donghyuck is a towering figure watching you with his glowing enticing eyes. Watching like a predator found a new sign of prey they cannot let go off. He finally found you again all to himself — he won’t stop now. Not now that you’re looking so beautiful with your fearful expression he sees while your glasses and your wet curls are there enchanting him. He must say he was a fool for not realising how pretty you look now.

It seems like you are confused. Donghyuck’s voice trails like an incoming train ready to take a roll ahead on the railway tracks ahead. It hit you like a hard brick when he goes to explain exactly the tiny little steps he will do now. “It’s simple, Y/n.” He leans in his lips inches away from your face. “You don’t want to tell me the truth then we’ll have to go through this the hard way.” He smirks and pushed you even more against the wall. “Until you cry…” His voice was soft suddenly as if he was sweet talking you right now but you knew deep down he meant every word.

You held your breath in when Donghyuck engulfs you into a passionate kiss that seems so loving at first. You were shocked he could kiss you in such a way. He was possible of kissing and treating you so nicely even if it was for a moment you feel yourself forgetting this was Donghyuck with the way he kissed you. When your lips touched his it felt so foreign. He made sure to take his time with you but at the same time there was hints of impatience and quickness. It was sweet, but dangerous at the same time. It’s like he wants your love, he was your love on him and only him. But you couldn’t help yourself but lean your head against the wall as Donghyuck’s hands brace themselves on your jawline holding it. The thumbs on the side press on your cheeks opening your mouth a little more access so he can slip inside his hungry tongue, ready to explore you in another hundred different ways.

Your thoughts all consist of many things such as: ‘This isn’t Donghyuck,’ or ‘Who was this boy?’ And you wonder the same thing. Donghyuck seems like a different person now and the mayhems he was brewing were over the top of the kiss when he pressed in deeply against your lips now. He made sure to kiss you so deeply your breath was sucked out of your body and you were feeling weak enough for your knees to tremble where you stood pressed latching on the wall that he made you go on. Donghyuck closed his eyes tight savouring his lips on yours. It was like a longing for him.

He loves hearing your little moans when he starts to lower his lips on your bottom lip pulling it apart lightly and then sucking on the exposed skin. He leaves a reddish love bite on it when the process was over and you groan closing your eyes as your head leans back against the wall. Donghyuck shifts the attention away from your mouth and now on your neck. The smell of your curly wet hair reminds him of the earthly rain outside, he didn’t hate it on you, the petrichor smell. Donghyuck’s tongue crawls down your skin on your neck, pressing wet kisses on it now. You feel your entire body going into a frenzy of shivers and pleasure. “Tell me you want more?” Donghyuck smirks as he still keeps his goal in mind.

You clench your eyes tight. “No.” You firmly told and Donghyuck smirks liking that you didn’t give in at all. Usually you wouldn’t waste a moment. But now you, you weren’t head over heels rushing in completely to him. Donghyuck was left thinking if you were doing this because of that senior earlier, Jaehyun, it fills him with some bad vibes from you. It would be a problem if you fell for someone that wasn’t him.

“Why?” He croaks against your neck now as he lifts his head up facing you with a dark glare. “Why, Y/n?” He asked once again with a snarl. You furrow your eyebrows, as you remember what happened the last time. You had the urge to tell him.

But you couldn’t bring yourself to explain why. You wonder if he would even care about it. And so you would rather stay with your own thoughts and not put the energy and effort to tell Donghyuck.

Donghyuck heard your lack of response and so, he starts to make scenarios up. He will know by your reactions if it was true or not anyways. He can read you like an open book when he catches you red handed. “It’s because of that senior isn’t it?” He comes closer to your face. “Jaehyun, right?” Your eyes brush against his now that he came closer saying Jaehyun’s name.

You furrow at the words as you’re now realising that Donghyuck was jealous. You couldn’t believe it. He was. Someone who would never be jealous was now jealous when it came to you and it sends your heart into some sort of pride overload.

“You’re jealous?” You say back with your eyebrows moving up on your forehead. Donghyuck glares at you. “I am not.” He said gritting his teeth at you. You push back with your words now. “You are. How did you know Jaehyun and I are friends?” You blurt out and Donghyuck looks down at you pulling on your hair gently, he tugs it and moves you around on the wall.

“I saw you.” He said simply and you grunt against the hair pull letting out a soft wince. You look up at Donghyuck, he was jealous, you saw it when his eyes tremble as you questioned him earlier. “You’re getting too comfortable thinking you can do and say what you want, Y/n, i would never get jealous.” He grits his teeth once again. “And even if I did get jealous, I have every right to.” He said brushing the free hand against your cheek. “Because you’re mine, no one else’s.” He seers in a rather greedy way. You never seen him like this before.

It didn’t take a moment for Donghyuck to lift your skirt. Instead of taking all your clothes he only rolled up your skirt taking a look at your black panties and he smirks watching your cheeks go red as he looks up at your eyes. He brushed over his hand. The clothed clit touching the very thin fingertips and you let out a little bit of a wince and a nudge. He saw you react quite well and he happens to enjoy seeing the struggling expression when he cups your area again now fully. “This pussy is mine, not Jaehyun’s, Y/n.” He reminds you again as he slips off your panties. You weren’t even aware of how cold you are when the fabric leaves your body dripping to your ankles and the way his cold fingers insert themselves to your insides so well — it shocks you deeply.

“Cold… cold…! Donghyuck.” You yelp and he saw your eyes widen. Donghyuck’s eyes up watching them dilate when he pushed the fingers of his within your walls as he smirks ear to ear. The movements became frequent leaving your soaking walls to squeeze and squeak. Donghyuck is loving the sounds you make, similar to ocean waves, they go back and forth in his control movements. He likes being in charge of your body, a lot more than you realise. You’re against the wall with your leg up on the side as you’re getting your walls pressed and stretched out, you’re loving how he feels so deep within you. The idea of his cock being this deep or even more drives you insane. He whispers. “Admit it. You wanted me to come to you like this.”

“L-like what? Admit what.” You said back between your voices changing the sounds as the way you’re being used against the walls like this. It strikes your body with many different layers of emotions you cannot process all at once. Donghyuck smirks as he slowly leans in, keeping the two fingers now deeply buried in your cunt wet dropping like strings of thin and thick slime. He watches your juices fall down resembling the heavy rain outside on his fingers and down your thighs and the floor in his house. “Admit that you wanted me to reach out to you and speak to you first. Admit that you wanted me to get jealous when you spoke to Jaehyun today.” He stares into your eyes deeply serious. He spoke with full attention on you. He darkly slants to you. “Admit you wanted me to say sorry first, Y/n.”

Your body reacts to each syllable and words he spoke to you before your voice and mouth could even answer Donghyuck. Your walls clench and your juices pour out making his eyes go darker shades of brown as he watches the sight of light happen in front of him. He can’t help but think to himself that he will never ever get tired of seeing you orgasm so much over his hand like this. As you orgasmed you held in your last bit and Donghyuck smirks seeing you try to shorten your orgasm as it’s become too much all at once. The boy brushed his hand and slaps the top of your swollen clit. Your pussy flinches in the process and your orgasm snaps fully and you release entirely now that he slaps your pussy for a good two seconds. It didn’t take long for you to let go fully.

You murmur out in broken moans in all desperation now as he slaps your centre completely down below you shake. “Y-yes! I admit it! I- I wanted you to say sorry… a-and i wanted you to approach me…” you let out a sigh as he stops taking another glance at your reddish cheeks and your eyes full of overflowing pleasure, he smirks again, leaning in. “And?” He adds softly in a dark powerful and controlling tone.

Your eyes trembling meet his. “And… I wanted you to get jealous…” you admit softly as you look down at the mess you made on his hands. Donghyuck tauntingly pressed his fingers against your mouth making you taste yourself on your own face. “Clever girl.” He praised you once again. “So you do know how to listen after all…” he trails carefully at you.

“Legs up sweetheart. I’m not done with you yet.” Donghyuck goes grabbing your legs and needing you to cooperate you do exactly that weakly pushing yourself more on the wall and wrapping your legs round the waist. He unbuckled the clothes down to his ankles and looks down as his long harden length coming out instantly, springs up, your eyes focus on the way his tip getting sucked inside your wall makes you groan by how you’re watching him enter you so well. You never knew you could get returned to such a pleasuring moment. You told yourself you won’t do this again. But you lied and now you won’t even listen to your previous statements because you’re enjoying the way Donghyuck was rutting inside you like you’re nothing but something to be used of his own pleasures. He treats you with so much roughness but at the same time, something was different.

He was more possessive of you now. He was much more sweet about this too. He took his time with you here and you feel yourself getting overstimulated the more this continues. He held your hands against the wall as he rocks to your inner core. Your eye contact was made multiple times he even dazed into your eyes only to lean in to give you a deeply pleasing kiss. You weren’t sure what made him so much more expressive in this moment. He wouldn’t even express himself before, but now?

The more this went on Donghyuck wanted to hear specific words coming from your own mouth with your very own voice. He looks at you getting close to your climax and he was coming close too however he didn’t care about his own orgasm for once.

For once he cares about what you’re going to say when he suddenly stops moving and your orgasm was ticking at the door. You were literally itching to orgasm and you let out a frustrated sigh when your eyes faze over at Donghyuck.

You were confused as to why he stopped to torture you. Donghyuck stares deeply and your confusion was cleared up when he speaks now, revealing what exactly he wants from you.

“Maybe you should call Jaehyun to help you cum.” Donghyuck adds in a mean tone.

Your eyes widen at such a beckoning demanding answer he gave you. You panic and see him pulling back but your legs wrapped around his waist stop him from being able to leave your body completely alone. You grab his clothes with your hands now desperately shaking your head as you look like you’re about to cry.

He was glad to see this reaction. Tears. He always loved seeing you cry because of him, and it makes him proud.

Donghyuck laughs seeing your reaction a little darkly. “Why are you crying, Y/n? Do you feel what I felt now when i saw you and Jaehyun speaking but you refused to talk to me for so long?” He mockingly said to you and you close your eyes tightly as the tears fell down your cheeks. “I-I’m sorry please, please don’t leave me here, I want to cum so bad I wanna cum.” You blabber on so much he can see you’re losing your mind in the process.

“Tell me why you ignored me.” Donghyuck darkly asked you once again as he brushed his fingers around your body. You are so itching for your orgasm you can’t even get it anymore because he won’t move until you answer his questions.

You huff out. “Because this whole thing is one sided. You might think I’m just crazy obsessed with you but I love you…”

It feels weird to say it out loud. You never really said the three words to him before. The simple word ‘I love you’ is pretty much a new thing to him and you now and when you said those, Donghyuck’s eyes widen and lit up as he watches you.

“You love me?” Donghyuck treads carefully against your neck planting a few kisses on your skin. They cause you to shudder a little wave of electricity down your spine. “Oh Y/n… you think this is one sided?” He laughs a little now.

He brought his face and held your hands on your hips now pushing you deeper in causing you to let out a longevity of your moan echoing through the walls. Enough to even make his neighbours hear your cries and your moans mixing together like a heavenly carpet tapestry on the wall.

“There’s nothing one-sided about this in the beginning.” Donghyuck begins, now forcing a thrust inside you once. “Wanna know why?” He croaks with a little groan. You murmur a silent sigh into your palm as your eyes widen watching the ceiling get bigger with the first long thrust he gave inside. “Because I loved you first, from the very beginning since we were children, and when I left you…” He smirks watching your eyes widen in confusion as he reveals that all along he’s loved you, but then he left you alone so suddenly when he realised he loved you. You couldn’t shake that imagination anymore and you shake your head not believing him.

Donghyuck grins satisfied by your respond. “Not believing me?” He says with a short smirk. “Why do you think i’m here apologising for my actions here?” He stated and you open your mouth with a pant as he keep on thrusting your body into the wall you are pressed upon. “Y-you… loved me all along?” You said with shock running on your voice, wild and confused.

The bodies you pressed one another your orgasm snaps at the end and he can feel your juices pour around his cock pushing inside your pussy. He feels himself releasing now from his twitching tip all the muscles contract and he feels a long groan stringing out by his beautiful honey voice. He pressed his head against your shoulder grabbing your hips right as Donghyuck was dizzy from the large orgasm you made him get. Your body feels so amazing it creates a side effect for him.

“Y/n…” Donghyuck begins with a soft sigh. He pants as he raised his head up meeting yours again. “I’ll ask you once again, only one last time.” He says watching you with a pair of softer eyes.

You focus your all efforts on your eyes watching him with a clear vision. Donghyuck sees you are listening now and he clears his mind as he asked the final question.

“Do you still love a Lowlife like me?”

You see him waiting for your answer as if his life depends on it and now you give him a slow nod. You didn’t change your mind on Donghyuck, and now that he even reveals he left you because of his deep feelings for you, it makes your heart flutter. He was horrible all along to make sure you never knew how he feels. But little further in the end he was the one falling for you even more.

“Yes…” you say with your voice. Donghyuck’s ears perk up as you answer him vocally too and he leans closer kissing your lips only for a short moment before pulling away. He held on to your thighs you wrapped around his body.

He loves the taste of you, who seems to be a biggest Lowlife he knows now, for loving him all along too.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

@onyourhyuck please refer from translating and copyrighting my work thank youu! Follow me for more updates it helps a girl out. <3

#nct fanfiction #nct smut #nct x reader #nct u scenarios #nct hard hours #nct series #nct fic #nct recs #haechan fic #haechan scenarios #haechan smut #haechan soft hours #haechan drabbles #haechan imagines #haechan headers #nct haechan smut #haechan nct 127 #nct moodboard #nct u layouts #nct u imagines #nct u moodboard #nct u smut #nct u reactions #nct fanfic #nct 127 scenarios #nct 127 smut #haechan hard hours #haechan hard thoughts #nct dream smut #nct dream hard thoughts

[vanillawurld]

༊*·˚West Coast

✧.* Pair - Miguel O'hara x Fem! Reader

✧.* Tags & Warnings - Smut, a little bit of fluff, swearing, kissing, teasing, fingering, sexual choking, slight spanking, degrading and praising, unprotected sex, Y/N's on the cream team, private sex (you'll see what I mean), crying, and creampie. (let me know if I missed anything)

✧.* Summary - Every spider-person in the building assumed that Miguel had left the building to complete a mission since they were unable find him, but little did they know he was too busy secretly fucking his favorite girl behind closed doors...

✧.* Extra - Reader is hinted to be from the West Coast of the U.S. Reader is hinted to being Latina. Reader is hinted of being a variant of Thena from the eternals. Miguel is a tiny bit out of character (and by that I mean a little bit nicer).

✧.* Word Count - 2,256

Miguel never really saw or thought of himself getting close to anyone. It's canon that every time a spider person gets close to someone, they get put them in an immense amount of danger. That's the sole main reason why he never wanted to get close to someone. Until he met her.

"You know Miguel, you're so negative. Why can't you have fun for once?" Y/N asked.

Miguel just ignored her snarky comment. He always said he didn't have time for stupidities and that he had too much work, he couldn't be distracted. There are some moments that people would think he was absent from the building because he's always locked in doing his multiverse work. and this was one of the times people thought he was away.

"Hey, come on. You need a break. You look like you haven't slept in day-"

"That's because I haven't." Miguel interrupted Y/N in an angry annoyed tone.

Y/N just looked at him and furrowed her eyebrows, " Ay, pero no te 'nojes. I'm just suggesting what's best for your health."

"I don't have time for your dumbass comments, Y/N. If you don't have anything useful to say, then don't say anything at all." Miguel replied and continued looking at different scenes from different dimensions.

Y/N just stayed quiet and sulked in the chair she had set next to Miguel. She hated when Miguel would get mad at her, especially if it was her fault. But oh how she loved how hot he looked. Her stomach would twist in guilt at him yelling at her, but she couldn't deny that she would get a little aroused.

A few minutes went by of pure silence. The only noise being made was the noises Miguel's devices were making. Y/N looked up at Miguel and smiled.

"You know, down on the West Coast, we have this saying... How did it go again? Shit, era como 'Late afternoon on the West Coast ends with the sky doing all its brilliant stuff.' " Y/N said. She missed her home in the West Coast. She missed the beautiful beaches and sunny skies. Miguel just looked at her and smirked just a tiny bit. He had forgotten she was pulled from the West Coast. He pulled a chair behind him and sat down to face her. "The West Coast, huh? Escuché que es muy bonito ahí."

Y/N's eyes went wide at him saying that. "Nunca has ido al West Coast?!"

Miguel only shook his head.

The two sat and talked to each other for quite a while to the point where they ignored anyone who tried calling them form their little watch devices. It was strange. Having a full civil conversation with Miguel without him insulting her or getting mad at her was very peaceful to say the least.

The tall male couldn’t deny that he enjoyed his conversation with Y/N. He always admired how courageous she was on her earth. For the love of Aphrodite, her hero name is inspired by the goddess of war and wisdom herself, Athena!

After the two stopped talking, they just looked at each other. Y/N’s eyes gleaming, attracting Miguel.

“Don’t look at me like that.” He whispered.

"Like what?" she innocently said to him.

Miguel stood up from his chair and got closer to the girl. He grabbed her jaw and leaned in, analyzing her face. She was a pretty girl, no doubt. He saw how some of the spider-people would stutter when speaking to her or how they would find anything to compliment her, whether it was her pretty eyes, funny jokes, or elegant fighting skills. They would do anything to make her smile.

That's what pissed O'hara off the most. He always told himself that he was just angry at other bullshit that was from a mission, but the little voice in the back of his head would be telling him he was angry because he was seeing other people trying to get to Y/N. That little voice was always the loudest. Miguel got tired of just staring at her. Their faces were so close to each other. Both O'hara and L/N closed the gap between them and started kissing like crazy.

It was sloppy.

The kiss was sloppy. They didn't have time for all of that slow lovey dovey bullshit. They needed to taste each other. Y/N stood up from her seat to fully experience the messy kiss. Lips moving aggressively. Tongues being shoved down each other's throats. Hands were wandering on each other's bodies.

Miguel pulled away from the kiss and made Y/N sit on a counter so he could stand in the middle of her legs. He started leaving small pecks on her lips all the way down to her collarbone. He loved hearing her whimper. It turned him on even more.

He started stripping her out of her clothes. He needed to see her in all of her glory. Y/N got a little embarrassed at the fact she was fully naked and he was still in his spider-suit, so she rested both of her hands on her private area to cover up a little bit. But Miguel didn't take that reaction very lightly.

He forcefully took her hands away from in between her thighs and slightly bared his fangs. "Don't try to cover now, slut." Miguel snarled.

"It's not fair that im all naked and you're not..." she said in response.

Miguel smirked and stepped back. He started to take off the top half of his suit. His buff figure was insane to Y/N. It's like he was molded by the gods. Miguel went back to kissing her collarbone, but this time his hands started wandering down to her most sensitive area. His fingers immediately started rubbing up and down on her wet pussy, making Y/N whimper.

Miguel looked at Y/N's face and gave her a smug smile. He needed to see more. He immediately shoved two fingers inside her wet hole and started fingering her, loving the sound of her arousal and moans.

"Te miras muy bonita, moaning for me." he whispered in her ear.

Miguel made Y/N fall into tiny pieces whenever she's with or around him. She couldn't help it. His broad strong shoulders and muscular back made her melt like ice cream and his muscles made her face warm like the morning sun.

Y/N's erotic moans made Miguel solid hard. The more she moaned, the faster his fingers kept going. She kept getting louder and louder. She couldn't take it, she needed him inside her, pounding into her like a crazy man and Miguel knew she needed him. He just loved to tease her.

"Miguel, please. I need you."

"What do you need exactly, princesa.

"I need you to fuck me~ Use me however you want~ I'm all yours..." She moaned out.

Miguel pulled his fingers out and stuck them in Y/N's mouth, making her taste her own arousal. He groaned at the sight of her sucking on his fingers, looking at him with those precious eyes that were begging him to fuck her.

He pulled away from her mouth and started taking off the bottom half of the spider suit, leaving him in his underwear. Letting his pretty girl in front of him drool at the sight of his bulge. He pulled out his hard cock and started stroking it a little bit in front of her, teasing her a bit.

"Get off the fucking table and turn around." He demanded, to which Y/N willingly complied to.

He forcefully grabbed the back of her neck and made her bend over, making her whimper at his strength. He lined the tip of his dick on her pussy and slightly pushed in. He knew what he was doing. Don't get him wrong, he wanted the same she wanted. He wanted nothing more to just pound into her until she forgot her own name, but he loved to see her all worked up.

Y/N started backing up a tiny bit so she could feel more of him inside her, but Miguel didn't like that. He slapped her ass cheek to make her stop, making Y/N moan at the impact. "You can't wait to get fuck, huh chiquita? You want me to fuck you? Yeah?" he teased.

Y/N whimpered and kept telling him yes. "Please fuck me, I need you inside m-" she was cut off by her own pornographic moan since Miguel shoved himself inside with no warning. He groaned at the feeling of her walls hugging his dick so tightly.

He started pounding into her, making her moan loudly. He suddenly remembered that people in the building thought he was absent from the building, and if they hear Y/N's sweet moans from inside his working headroom, they will know something is up and barge in. Miguel leaned forward and grabbed Y/N's throat and pulled her upper body towards his chest.

"Shut the fuck up. I don't need anyone barging in on me fucking you. Unless you want that to happen since you're moaning so fucking loud like a whore." he groaned in her ear. Y/N could only moan in response. The pleasure she was feeling in her body was too good.

"No? You don't want to listen?" Miguel started pounding into her even harder, making her scream in pleasure. The pleasure was starting to become too much for Y/N to the point where she started feeling tears build up in her eyes. Her vision started to become blurred so she closed her eyes and felt the tears fall from her eyes.

"You're such a good girl, baby. Taking me so well like a fucking slut." He praised. He started to leave little kisses on her cheek and had his unoccupied hand travel down to rub her puffy clit. He looked down to watch his cock disappear and reappear with every thrust he made and with every thrust he made, he realized Y/N was creaming more and more. To the point that it started reaching his fingers that were rubbing her clit.

The sight of Y/N creaming made O'hara's thrusts more aggressive. His groans started to become louder and louder. Everything was going smoothly and full of pleasure until Y/N's little watch started ringing, indicating someone was calling her. Miguel's thrusting didn't slow down though, he didn't care.

"Answer it." he demanded.

Y/N's eyes widened, "B-But-"

"But nothing, answer it or I'll stop fucking you."

Y/N's shaky hand pressed the button to answer the call and answered it like how anyone would answer a regular phone call. "Y/N, it's me." A voice called out.

Ben.

Ben fucking Reilly.

The Spiderman that would take his flirting with Y/N a little too far for Miguel. "H-hey Ben! Is there a r- oh fuck - reason why you're calling?" Y/N tried answering without sounding suspicious.

Ben let out a dramatic sigh, "Yes, there is actually." He dramatically said. Ben was a very dramatic Spiderman. Some spider-people would call him a wannabe anime character from how much he exaggerates things.

"Well what is-" "I just wanted to-" they both spoke at the same time. Ben let out another dramatic sigh, "Y/N, please. Don't interrupt."

Y/N brought her hand up to her mouth to try and hide the moans she wanted to let out so badly. "Y/N, I wanted to call you and ask you out on a very amazing date. I think you are the woman of my dreams and I need a strong woman like you by my side." Ben dramatcially said.

That was the final straw for Miguel.

Miguel gripped both of his hands on Y/N plump ass and started pounding into her even harder, making Y/N's tears come down even more. Y/N's grip on her mouth tightened even more, in fear of letting out a moan and ruining everything.

"Is that a yes or a no, princesa," Miguel whispered as he smirked. He forcefully took her hand off her mouth for her to answer. Y/N didn't want Ben to know Miguel was drilling into her. That would be so embarrassing.

"I-I'm sorry, Ben! I can't t-talk right now" she tried her best to say. Ben let out another dramatic sigh, "But why, Y/N?"

"Because she's busy," Miguel said out loud. He pressed the hang-up button and continued his vicious pounding. Y/N began to feel a strange but pleasurable feeling in her abdomen and so did Miguel.

"Fuck, Miguel~ I'm gonna cum~"

"Yeah? You wanna cum, baby?~" Miguel teased. Y/N moaned in response and didn't have time for his teasing. She let out her final erotic moan and came. She came all over his cock. Miguel came shortly after and filled Y/N up with his load.

Miguel groaned and let his upper body softly lay on Y/N's back, giving it little kisses. They stayed like that until their gasps started to slow down. Miguel pulled out and watched as his cum started coming out of her pussy. Running down her thigh and some even dropping to the floor. He smiled at his accomplishment.

"Okay, are you two done now!? I have some very important data I need to run and I've been waiting patiently!" a voice said, making Miguel and Y/N snap their necks to the right to see the iconic female hologram.

"Lyla, you scared the shit out of us, a-and why are you turned around?" Miguel asked confusingly.

"Because I don't want to see both of you naked! Hurry up and get dressed I need your monitor to run some data!"

˖◛. *. ⋆ Vanilla Speaks

Can you tell that i like lana del rey

also me fighting the urge to add Salvadoran slang because I'm salvadoran...

+ Ay, pero no te 'nojes - Oh but don't get mad

+ era como - It was like

+ Escuché que es muy bonito ahí - I heard it's very beautiful over there

+ Nunca has ido al - You've never been to

+ Te miras muy bonita -You look very beautiful

+ princesa - Princess

+ chiquita - little thing/ little one

#Miguel o'hara x reader #Miguel o'hara imagine #Marvel #across the spiderverse #spiderman 2099 #spiderman smut #Latina! reader

[swordcreature]

hiii, I really love your writing and got super excited when I saw that you take requests.

could you possibly do headcanons or like, short scenarios for how the companions would react to: a Tav who's normally relentlessly positive just fucking snapping. like they get back to camp one night and Tav's whole facade just shatters?

thank you if you do!! ♡♡

ty ty ty you're too nice i'm here blushing <3

okay so i ended up writing the six origin companions, but if there was someone else you were specifically looking for like halsin or jahiera please let me know!!

i also wrote this from a romance pov for each companion taking place very very vaguely in the third act.

ngl i struggled trying to find a way to write this that i was satisfied with. i don't know that i have like an in depth conceptualization of every single companion given that there are so many changes to them throughout the story, some of which you can't possibly see in a single playthrough

but i think i found a happy medium between love and hate lol

i really hope you like it!!!!

Shadowheart, Astarion, Lae'zel, Wyll, Gale, & Karlach - When Tav Snaps

How the companions react to chronically positive Tav snapping

(Tav is GN in this)

Shadowheart: 

Secretly, Shadowheart is just the tiniest bit pleased to see their leader, normally sunshine and rainbows and just too damn chipper, sulk back into camp. But that feeling is quickly replaced by overwhelming guilt and worry as she realizes that something is very wrong with Tav. She tries to reach out, offering a hand to gently ask what's wrong. When Tav snaps, yelling and crying and breathing so hard that they look like they might puke, Shadowheart is frozen. She watches in terror, almost outside of her own body, as the one she loves most loses their composure until just raw embers remain. Shadowheart so desperately wants to do something, to say anything, but the reflexes learned from years under Shar’s stoic thumb kick in and she cannot move. Tav is the strong one, the person she turns to when the weight of the world is too much to bear, not the other way around! She’s supposed to be the emotionally stunted one, the broken one, godsdamnit! The only thing she can think to do in the moment is to borrow from Tav, to replicate what they have done for her so many times on this fucked up adventure they’re on. So, she sits Tav down and listens. Lets them cry and cry and cry until their eyes are so swollen they can’t open them very far. Shadowheart puts a hand on their knee to ground them and offers quiet, soft words of comfort. She doesn’t want to solve all the problems that led to this – she'd be stupid to think she could. No, she wants Tav to know that it’s okay to feel these heavy things. They don’t have to keep everything bottled up until they crack. If anything, Shadowheart wants them to know that they can be anything and everything with her, and she will still be there to listen and to love. 

Astarion: 

Astarion pretends that Tav is the most annoyingly optimistic, too happy, do-gooder to ever grace his presence, but deep down their relentless positivity enamors him in an odd way. He’d never say that aloud though. He has gotten used to Tav practically skipping back into camp, head high and smile bright. So, when they take one, heavy footstep close enough to camp for Astarion to hear, his hackles immediately rise. His eye trail Tav as they trudge back into camp, ignoring the calls of the other companions as they seem to blankly seek out their own tent. Astarion tries to offer a lusty quip, something to lighten the mood, and he hates the way his voice wavers with concern. When Tav doesn’t respond, he’s quick to take their shoulders, turning them away from camp, towards someplace more private. Tav doesn’t fight back or say a word which is like a knife to Astarion’s dead heart – he's never seen them without a grin, let alone so despondent. In private, he pushes for an answer as to what’s going on, pressing the matter to its breaking point because he doesn’t know what to do, doesn’t know how to make them happy. And what use is he if he can’t even bring a smile to the face of the one person he cares about? Tav’s resolve breaks. They’re seething, angry at the world, sobbing and sneering and crumbling. Astarion stares, wide eyed. Part of him wants to slip back into old habits, acting as though he finds amusement in Tav’s breakdown. The happy-go-lucky leader finally snapping? How delightfully ironic! But that’s not him anymore. At least, he’s trying to not be that anymore. So, he pulls Tav towards him. His body instinctively tenses before reminding himself that this is Tav and the decision to hold them is his alone. Tav sobs harder into his chest. For a moment, Astarion thinks he’s done something wrong. But the longer he holds them there the lower their sobs get, until they’re left heaving in breath after breath, slowly calming down. Astarion hasn’t said a word since they left camp. He doesn’t need to. The unspoken language of touch tells Tav everything they needed to know: he’s here for them, he cares for them, they’re safe with him. And when Tav is calm and they walk back to camp, he’s not to be blamed for the sardonic joke he lets slip. 

Lae’zel: 

Lae’zel immediately notices that Tav’s demeanor has changed when they walk back into camp with clenched fists and nostrils flared. She can sense the difference a mile away, but to her that’s all it is. A change. She’s not incredibly well versed in the range of emotions that non-githyanki display, but she at least understands that this is not Tav’s normal. She watches from the corner of her eye as they make a beeline to their tent. It’s strange to say the least. Something tells Lae’zel that she should check on them, some small part of herself that never used to neg her before she met Tav. So, she tentatively steps towards their tent, hands awkwardly at her sides. She calls for them, and they pop their head out with puffy, red eyes. Lae’zel speaks and she’s confident she said the right words. Until Tav is back inside their tent muffling a scream into a pillow, making horrendously loud noises as they try to catch their breath. Lae’zel stands motionless, still outside the tent. She grits her teeth as she battles with her own mind. This kind of behavior is weak, their leader should not be displaying such things outwardly. But, this is Tav who has taught her so much in such a short time – like that it’s okay to show weakness, vulnerability, even if she struggles with it still. The part of her that cares for Tav more than it fears weakness wins over, and she steps through the threshold of Tav’s tent. They’re disheveled: hair a mess, nose snotty, eyes bloodshot. Lae’zel sits next to them as they stare at her. A moment passes before they return to sobbing into a pile of pillows. Lae’zel is truly out of her element, and out of sheer unease she starts to talk. She’s not really even saying anything of much importance, just tiny pieces of her life before the tadpole. The first time she wielded a sword, how she wanted to ride a red dragon as a child, the first time she saw a human in person. She just talks and talks and talks, never even looking at Tav until their breath evens out and their body slumps. They fell asleep. Lae’zel leaves quietly, but not before she pulls a blanket over Tav’s shoulders. 

Wyll: 

Wyll knew it was coming. Although Tav is an absolute delight, he's seen before how holding back all negativity can really break a person. It’s no surprise when one day he finds Tav in a destroyed building not far from camp, knees tucked against them, heaving as though they’d been kicked in the chest. The only thing keeping their wails quiet was the hand shoved in their mouth, biting down with a force that surely had drawn blood. Wyll kneels before them, pulling their face up with both of his hands, and commands them to look at him using the same voice his father would use on him as a child. Strong and assured. He takes a big breath in, urging Tav with his eyes to do the same. Tav mimics his actions again and again, little sobs and hiccups escaping every so often. They sit like that for a while until Wyll is sure that Tav is more controlled. He takes the space next to them, allowing them a moment to collect their thoughts. Wyll listens attentively and even relents when Tav asks to be alone, seeing the ghost of a smile on their face. When Tav gets back to camp, Wyll is waiting for them with a plate of warm food ready. The other companions are all in their tent – Wyll didn’t ask so much as forcefully suggested that they make themselves scarce – so the two have the fire all to themselves. The silence between them is easy. Wyll sits Tav between his legs and leans them back to his chest. His fingers run through their hair, undoing the knots that formed as they broke down against the harsh stone wall. When Tav falls asleep like that, he doesn’t move them. Instead, Wyll settles in and tries to make himself at least somehwat comfortable while his love gets their first good night's rest in a long time.  

Gale: 

Gale blabbers on and on about something so inane and stupid that most of the camp has retreated to their tents by now. Except for Tav who was returning from the Wyrm’s Rock. Letting go of poor Wyll, the only campmate too polite to leave Gale outright, he turns to Tav, walking in step beside them. He misses the way their eyes don’t lift from the ground, too busy waving his hands around to accentuate his point. They ask for a bit of space, but Gale is too enthralled in his speech to notice the way Tav’s eyes water when he doesn’t step away. And then they snap, tears spilling, hissing harshly for Gale to just shut up. He’s shocked, mouth hanging wide open in surprise. He doesn’t even chase after them when they walk past him, not stopping until they’re out of camp, over the road, and into the tree line. Gale’s not stupid though, he knows that Tav would never be so impolite normally. So, despite his pride being slightly wounded, he follows where they cut through the forest, hoping they didn’t go too far. When he finds them, they’re stomping around a clearing pulling at their hair, face contorted as they cry. Did he do this? Gale clears his throat to make himself known. Tav peers at him for a moment before turning around, holding their arms against their chest like they could fall apart in the breeze. Gale takes a hesitant step towards them, gauging his next best move. When they don’t protest, he closes the distance between them and puts a hand on their shoulder. They turn and immediately pull themself into his arms. Gale is quick to hold them there, resting his chin on their head, stroking their hair with his palm. He doesn’t know how to solve this, how to make them feel better, though something in him says to keep still. Keep holding Tav to his chest until they no longer shake. He idly wonders if a calming spell would work better than the little comfort his arms can provide. But Tav’s breath is slowing, their cries going silent. His voice is warm in their ear as he recites some poem that comes to memory of a man who thought he could hold the world on his shoulders. Tav only half listens but lets Gale cradle them against him until they look up and softly ask to go back to camp. 

Karlach: 

Karlach thinks she is the luckiest woman alive. Fresh out of the Hells for the first time in ten years and she meets someone who is sunshine incarnate, someone who has a good heart, someone who wants her as much as she wants them. Then, she gets to actually touch the person she loves? She’s sure she’s never been happier. Every time Tav strolls into camp with a spring in their step, Karlach’s heart could burst with love – and not hellfire. She knows Tav is due back and her heart flutters impatiently as she waits. But it quickly starts to sink, more like drops ten stories to the groun, as she sees Tav with their eyes glued to the ground, walking into camp as though they’ve been carrying the owl bear cub on their shoulders for the past hour. They try to walk past Karlach in a rush, but she sticks out an arm to clothesline them. Karlach is so much stronger than Tav, so it’s easy for her to pull them to stand in front of her even as they put up a small fight. She wants to know what’s wrong, something is very clearly wrong, but Tav doesn’t budge. They fight back tears and stare at the ground. This was going to take drastic measures. With no warning, Karlach grabs Tav’s hand, yanking them out of camp and into one of the alleyways that connect it to the lower city. She stops as she eyes her goal. The alley is littered with wooden crates and barrels, old vases and general garbage. Tav’s confusion temporarily surmounts their urge to cry though it’s short lived. They look up to Kalach searching for an answer. Karlach just smiles and removes the mace she keeps strapped to her back in case of emergencies. She hands it to Tav with a nod towards the debris. Tav understands, or at least they think they do – they've surely seen Karlach commit enough property damage in the heat of a breakdown to get the idea. A deafening crack bounces down the alley as Tav connects the mace to a standing wooden barrel. It explodes into shards of splinters, and with it so does Tav’s resolve. They scream as they swing the mace into their next victim, a crate filled with used glass bottles. It lets out a satisfying crunch. Karlach isn’t sure how long she stands there, letting Tav silence their sobs with the sound of destruction. They’re out of breath, their swings weaker as they try to continue. But Karlach catches the mace on its down swing, pulling it and Tav close. Tav tries in vain to catch their breath as Karlach squeezes it out of them in a hug so tight it could bruise. With a shaky voice, Tav thanks her, leaning their forehead against herchest and closing their eyes. Karlach doesn’t let go for a long, long time.  

#bg3 #bg3 astarion #bg3 shadowheart #bg3 lae'zel #bg3 wyll #bg3 gale #bg3 karlach #shadowheart #astarion #lae'zel #wyll #gale #karlach #shadowheart x tav #astarion x tav #lae'zel x tav #wyll x tav #gale x tav #karlach x tav #my writing #requests/suggestions

[callsigns-haze]

That Lavender Haze….

THIS IS REPOSTED FROM MY OLD BLOG!

A/n: This is the first post to my new blog so please be nice! I'm going to try to make this into a series so please show this story a bit of love and reblog!

Pairing: Jake 'Hangman' Seresin x Y/n 'Haze' Mitchell

Word count: 2.7k

Summary: Y/N has always got broken by the person she goes back to. Driving up to her wingman's house every time might sound crazy but the both of them are stuck in that haze…

Warning: Smut, heart breaks and a bit of angst

Based of the song: Lavender Haze by Taylor Swift

You ought not have driven here, outside of your wingman's and his best friends apartment. You shouldn't have climbed the four floors and walked right down the gray hallway. You definitely ought not be knocking on their front door, hoping he's home to temporarily put you back together.

This is wrong, you know it is. But this was likely to happen. You always come to Hangman, seeking the love and attention you've been stolen of.

This is a unnatural thing, it's normal for the both of you. To everyone else, the connection you have with Jake seems cruel and one-sided.

That's why when the door swings open and dark brown eyes cut into slits at the sight of you, you drop your eyes and look down at your slick hands.

"What?" Coyote asks, tone cross as he keeps the door cracked. You keep your eyes low and chew on your bottom lip.

"You know why I'm here." Your voice is broken, tears still in your eyes, accompanying the sobs caught in your throat.

"I do." Javy says.

You sigh and take a deep breath.

"I'm not as bad as you seem to think I am, Coyote." You say, staring down at your thumbs hoping he doesn't retaliate with his usual scoff and roll of the eyes.

Instead, he exhales in a huff.

"Why do you do this?" He questions, a hint of pleading in his inquiry.

"I need him…" You whisper, feeling the guilt and selfishness curl around each word.

"But you've got a boyfriend." He tries reasoning with you. "You know he can't date anyone because he waits around for the next time he'll have to take care of you, right? Why not just leave your cunt of a boyfriend and be with Jake?"

You feel the air whisp around you as Javy throws his hands up, frustrated with the situation. His anger can only grow with your response.

"I need him, too. I love him and I can't leave." You explain, every bit ridden with tragic truth. Without seeing Coyotes' face, you can hear the disapproval swimming around in his mind and it adds to the ache in your torso; the edges of the hole widening and stinging as you wrap your arms around yourself, a feeble attempt at keeping yourself whole.

"Please," you whisper, properly holding Javy' cold, cobalt gaze for the first time since he's opened Jake's door, "just let me in. Please."

He stares into your hollowed eyes for a long moment, an exasperated sigh heaving in his chest, but steps aside to let you into Hangman's apartment.

"I know he'll hate me if I refuse you." He says, shaking his head. "He's sleeping on the couch in the living room, I'm leaving." Coyote grabs his keys from the breakfast bar, then he's gone.

You drop your bag and jacket on the floor and head towards the living room, finding a deep sleep Jake sprawled out on his sofa. Just the sight of him reels in the pain of what's happened earlier, but not enough to numb it.

Kneeling down, you push his blonde hairs from his face, scratching his scalp as you go. A contented sigh blows through his nose, causing you to smile at his peaceful state.

"Jake…" You whisper, leaning in to place a kiss on his cheek. He stirs a bit but his eyes stay closed. You press your lips to his and run your nose along his chin.

"Hangman, wake up." You breathe. His eyes flutter as an agitated groan sounds in his throat.

"Fuck off, Coyote," He murmurs, batting you away. "We can finish the movie later, I'm tired."

"I'm not Javy, cowboy." You say, poking his nose so that he opens his eyes fully, smiling wide once he realizes who's woken him.

"Hey, angel," He half yawns, stretching like a massive cat. He sits up, shaking his hair around, then looks at you. Really looks at you.

"What's happened?" He asks as you rise to sit next to him on the sofa, your legs laying across his lap and his hands resting on your thighs.

"It's nothing. I just popped by." Your attempt to sound nonchalant falters, your voice cracking due to the amount of time you spent crying on the way there.

"Nothing? Really, Haze? Have you forgotten how well I know you?" He questions, glancing at the clock on the cable box, then eyeing you suspiciously. "Or maybe the fact that you're "popping by" at half passed midnight?"

"It's fine, Jake. I'll be fine." You mutter.

"Your eyes are red and puffy, your cheeks are tear stained, and your arms are wrapped around your middle like you're trying to hold yourself together." Jake observes, scooping you up and into his lap. He lays his head on your shoulder and places soft kisses on your neck as he rubs your back.

"I don't want to say." You breathe, sniffing as images of your boyfriend intimately touching another woman cloud your memory.

"Shhh, it's okay. You don't have to tell me." He coos, turning your face towards his. He runs an index finger down your jawbone before brushing his lips against yours.

"I'll take care of you." He whispers, running his fingers through your hair. "I'll make you forget."

The warmth of his lips press to yours, surging comfort and safety throughout your body. His hands run over your back and thighs, the hole in your chest already starting to close. Jake pulls back, eyes furrowed and breath jagged.

"Be mine…just for tonight. Just for a few hours." He murmurs, wiping away your tears kissing you softly. You nod your head, melding your lips together as he cradles your body to his chest and lifts you, starting towards his bedroom.

This is where the cycle repeats itself. You get hurt, you run to Jake, Jake makes love to you, you leave him to go back to the one causing the pain. It's a backwards agreement, made years before. Hangman's always been there, always volunteering to pick up the pieces and fill in the cracks.

And you know why.

It's in the way he touches you, the way he stares into your eyes with the utmost sincerity. The way he held you when your first pet died, the way he walked you home everyday after school, even though you didn't go to the same one. The way he cradled your face in both hands when he gave you your first kiss.

And you know it's killing him.

It's in the way his face fell when you told him about your first boyfriend, the way he didn't want to know about your first time. The way he drags his feet every time he walks you to his door, riding out the kiss goodbye with a languid pull of his lips. The way he takes his time with you, savoring every second he gets to spend expertly navigating about your body. No one knows your body like he does, not even the man you love.

Even with this knowledge, you still return to him; eyes puffy, nose sniffling, and in need of a good cuddle. But it's never been just a cuddle. Never been Jake holding his best friend until she cries away the pain.

It's always been Jake making love to the woman he adores, chasing the pain away. It's wrong, and it's morally backwards, but you can't let it go. You need his unrequited love just like he needs to take care of you, it works for you both.

So here you are, sat on Jake's lap as he sits on the edge of his bed, lips smacking together as hips grind. His fingers slip underneath your shirt, caressing the taut skin as he lifts the fabric up and off. You do the same, pressing your lips to his newly exposed collarbone and scratching your nails down his stomach. He moans into your skin, sucking on the heated flesh of your shoulder as he undoes the button and fly of your jeans. He gently slides you off of his lap, standing to remove his own sweatpants. You start to do the same but he stops you, batting your hands away.

"I'll be doing that." He says, licking your lips before kissing you with a new determination. He breaks away, holding your stare as he stands straight, hooking his thumbs in his gray boxer briefs and sliding them down his lean legs.

His cock springs free, taking your attention as it thumps against his stomach.

Jake kneels in front of you, carefully removing each sneaker from your feet, followed by your socks. He rises, bringing you with him to lift you in his arms, wrapping your legs around his waist. A shudder runs over you both as his dick presses against your moistening center through your jeans. His lips find yours, hands cupping your backside as he climbs on to the bed, laying you beneath him.

He sits back on his heels, eyes locked with yours as he removes your jeans. You bite your bottom lip as he mouths at your ankle, lips ascending up your calf, tongue licking at the inside of your knee. He does the same with the other leg, venturing up your inner thigh and nipping at your sensitive skin. His verdigris gaze holds your own as he closes his mouth around your clothed center, hot breath washing over the intense sensitivity. Your back arches, hands gripping your breasts as pleasure pools in your belly.

"Please…" you whimper, grinding your yourself on his mouth. He doesn't hesitate to rid you of your underwear, immediately spreading your lips apart and licking at your clit. His tongue glides along the length of your core and he hums in appreciation, closing his eyes at the taste of your arousal.

You claw at the sheets, watching as Jake loses himself in pleasuring you.

Your fingers run through russet ringlets, nails scratching at his scalp and his eyes roll back. Your eyebrows pull together, sending Jake a silent plea. He knows what it means, so it's no surprise when he detaches himself from your soaking core with a loud smack of his lips, parting with one last lick over your entrance. His tongue slides up your tightening stomach, lips nipping and sucking at taut skin as you try catching your breath.

Jake kisses at your breasts, teeth coming down over each clothed nipple. His hands slide under your back, unclasping your bra and tossing it somewhere off to the side. You yelp as he sucks a hard nipple into his mouth, tongue circling the risen flesh. You pull at his curls and he sighs, sucking harder.

"Jake!" You holler, grinding your drenched center along his stiff shaft. He moans loudly, releasing your nipple and capturing your lips into a deep, lust driven kiss.

"Jake, please…" you whisper against his lips, and he needs no further instruction.

He lines himself at your entrance, covering his lips with yours as he slips inside you. His girth stretches you, his length making you feel full as he bottoms out.

"I've missed being inside you, Haze." He murmurs, leaving open-mouthed kisses down your jaw as he groans. "God, you're so tight for me."

Your thighs hug his waist, hands gripping his wide shoulders while he grinds around inside you. Your boyfriend is nowhere near Jake's size, so he's giving your walls time to adjust to the intrusion.

"Move…" you moan into Jake's ear, lips brushing against his lobe and he shivers. He props himself up on one elbow, looking down at your aroused expression. One hand lays on your cheek as the other grips the sheet by your head.

"Ssshhhit…" he hisses, pulling out halfway, then diving back inside at a leisurely pace.

He holds your eyes, watching your reaction to his tip brushing against that spot deep inside. You lick your lips and hook your hand on the back of his neck, tugging him down to you. He crashes his lips to yours, absorbing your moans while trading a few of his own.

As you start to think of how much you wish Jake would venture a bit deeper and pick up the pace, Jake's lips pull away. He lifts his upper body, holding himself up on his hands, placed on either side of your head, and drives into you with a new, shaper force.

Hangman's length delves into your warmth, not stopping until he's fully sheathed inside with his pelvic bone greeting yours. A delighted groan sounds in your throat, not making it passed your lips as you've taken the lower between your teeth. Your eyes roll to the back of your head as he swivels his hips, grinding the tip of his cock against your g-spot.

"Fuck…" He sighs, reveling in the moisture of your tight confines as he pulls back just a bit, delivering short, forceful thrusts in that way your body's craved. Your eyes open to see a darkened shade of jade, his mouth agape as he pleasures you both and watches your reactions to his every move, groaning when you squeeze around his shaft, taken by the sight of him.

You silently thank your best friend for having the uncanny ability to know exactly what you want, when you want it, and how; tangling your fingers in his hair and claiming his rosy lips. He kisses you back with great fervor, relishing in your gratitude as he increases the length of his strokes, pulling out until just the tip, then thrusting back in with powerful determination.

He pushes his knees up and under your lower back, raising your abdomen, now leveled with his groin. The thrusts are impossibly deeper this way, your muffled cries rising a few octaves as a large knot forms in your belly. Jake sucks your tongue, growling when your nails dig into the skin of his back, prompting him to go faster and harder. He breaks away from your lips, groaning incessantly as your body starts to quiver. Pressing his forehead to yours, reaches between the two of you to circle your clit with his middle finger.

"Yes, angel," he pants, kissing you chastely and repeatedly pounding into you,"cum for me."

The pressure on your clit sends you right over the edge, back arching and toes curling as you give in to your erupting climax.

Your orgasm exploding around Jake's cock makes him reach his own climax, teeth digging into your throat as he growls and white-knuckles the sheets. His cum spills inside of you, the sensation eliciting a contented moan from your own lips. No one can do that but Jake, not even the man you love.

The man you think you love.

The man you've left at home to come lay in Jake's bed.

Jake's lips sponge feather light kisses along your shoulder, silently asking if you're okay. You wrap your arms around his neck and squeeze, assuring him you're just fine, especially in his arms.

You're clothes are on, your keys twirling in your hand as you lean against your wingman's front door. He stands a couple of feet away, kicking at the carpet with his naked feet, sweatpants hung low on his hips and wet hair smoothed back. You push yourself off of his door, walking over to him and laying your head on his bare chest to listen to his heart as your arms simultaneously encircle each other.

"You know who it beats for." Jake whispers, tangling his fingers in your hair. You nod, turning your face towards his and allowing him to mold his lips to yours.

The kiss deepens when he pushes his tongue past your teeth, walking forward until your back is pressed to his front door once again. He moans into the kiss, hands roaming your body as yours rest in his damp curls.

He pulls away and buries his face in the crook of your neck, nose affectionately nudging your head to the side so he can kiss the searing skin there.

You feel it before he says it. The adoration, the undying dedication, the promise to never give up on this wayward friendship.

"I'll always be waiting." He whispers, kissing your ear, then softly kissing your lips.

"Come back to me." He says, like always.

"You know I will." You say, tracing the outline of his bottom lip before turning around and unlocking the door.

Neither of you choose to speak on how sad the legitimacy of that statement really is.

But that was 7 years ago and that was the first time you never came back…

A/n: And this is the first post for Haze and Hangman! Please reblog this post and give them love! Please tell me if you want to be added to the taglist and follow this blog since we're only getting started!

Tagging some friends:

@callsign-magnolia

@shanimallina87

@callsign-dexter

@rosiahills22

@horseslovers2016

@djs8891

@hookslove1592

@emma8895eb

@hardballoonlove

@kmc1989

#jake seresin #hangman x reader #hangman top gun #top gun hangman #jake hangman seresin #jake seresin imagine #jake seresin x reader #jake seresin x you #jake seresin x y/n #jake hangman fic #jake hangman x reader #jake hangman x you #jake hangman imagine #hangman imagine #hangman seresin #hangman fanfiction #top gun maverick #hangman seresin x reader #hangman seresin x you #hangman smut #hangman x y/n #top gun maverick #hangman x you

[smartycvnt]

Title: Dependent

Pairing: Cody Rhodes x Reader

Prompt: "I didn't realize I was such an inconvenience." + "Don't touch me."

Word Count: 917

Ash was no stranger to anger. She had struggled to contain it for the majority of her life. It always seemed like the moment that she was happy and had things under control, she was blindsided. Cody had promised her that things would be different, and yet, they had still managed to stay the same.

Cody was great to her, and Ash wouldn't have willingly traded it for anything. She had never been with anybody else who knew how to calm her down like Cody did. They had been friends first for a long time, but Ash knew that it went further than that. Cody Rhodes was the love of her life and soulmate.

"Ash, I didn't mean it like that," Cody tried. It was unfortunately in vain. Every time that he tried to reassure Ash that they were on good terms, it fell on deaf ears. All of that was starting to grate on Cody's nerves, but he knew that nothing good would come of having an outburst alongside Ash.

"You meant it how you said Cody, it's plain and simple. I just didn't realize that I was such an inconvenience for you. I mean, you might as well go back to your perfect life before. At least Brandi could handle her emotions like an adult, right?" Ash stared up at Cody with eyes full of tears. It was taking every bit of her restraint not to let them fall. Ash's anger tended to come in a very cold and detached manner, and Cody knew that the tears meant he had fucked up.

"You're not an inconvenience," Cody said as he tried to put his arm around Ash's shoulders. She shrugged him away instantly, leaving Cody to stand there dumbfounded. "Ash, come on."

"Don't touch me!" Ash shouted. Cody's face fell. She stormed away from him and their house. Cody wasn't sure what to do, but he knew Ash needed some space. All he could do was hope that she'd be smart and call someone to come and get her before she got too far. The last thing that Cody ever wanted was to hear that something had happened to Ash.

The hours ticked by as Cody waited for any sort of news about Ash. He could feel exhaustion weighing down his mind and body, but he didn't fall asleep until long after the sun had risen in the morning. Cody hadn't moved from the living room couch. He didn't want Ash to come back and think that he had easily moved on with his night without her there. He tried her phone a couple of times, but it went straight to voicemail both times.

Cody was at his wit's end by the time that he finally bit the bullet and called Seth. It wasn't an easy task to ask for help from someone who hated him, but Cody knew that Seth was the most likely person to know where Ash had run off to. Ash was like an honorary SHIELD member and had been a close friend of Seth's before his WWE days. "Seth, hey man, you haven't seen Ash have you?"

"I haven't seen her, but Becky said that she called last night pretty upset. I'm out of town, but Ash should be with Becky and Charlotte. Whatever you did, you really messed up. You'd better fix it," Seth warned. Cody knew that he did need to fix things, but it was so hard to make sure that Ash understood him.

"I will. I don't want to lose her," Cody said. He hung up the phone and sent a text to Becky letting her know that he was headed over there. She answered almost instantly, and despite her message being reassuring, Cody had a bad feeling about going over there. He wanted things to work out, but there was no guarantee that Ash would take him back. She had a tendency of holding grudges, even whenever she didn't want to distance herself from whoever she was mad at in the moment.

Cody's bad feeling only got worse when he saw Ash waiting for him in the driveway. She looked like she had been crying since she left. Cody was hit with a wave of guilt that made him feel sick to his stomach. He gingerly got out of the car, and Ash walked right up to him.

"I can't take you back. Not right now at least," Ash told him.

"You couldn't at least humor me a little before you break my heart?" Cody asked with a dry laugh. Ash shook her head as she looked down at her hands. "Can you at least tell me why?"

"I let myself become dependent on you, and I can't do that. I need to be my own adult. You can't come calm me down constantly. One day I'd love to revisit this because I love you more than anybody else in the world, but it's not fair. Not the way things are. Goodbye Cody, I love you."

"Yeah, alright. I love you too. I wish that it didn't have to end like this. I'd never have even opened my mouth if I knew this was where things were going," Cody said. Ash grabbed onto Cody's arm to steady herself as she leaned up to kiss him on the cheek. Cody watched Ash go back inside of Becky's house, but he couldn't bring himself to go back into the car or anywhere for quite a few minutes.

Tag List: @himbos-hotline @thepalaceofmelanie @allyinwonderland18 @coleskingdom

#my writing #one shot #wwe x reader #wwe #cody rhodes x reader #cody rhodes

[angel-fics]

In The Room Where You Sleep

Summary: Dalton was just being curious and stumbles upon something he probably shouldn’t have. He then does something he shouldn’t have.

Warnings: Mentions of the Further, mentions of entities, Dalton being a creep, stalking, voyeurism, masturbation (f & m), sexual fantasies

All credit to @glodessa who wrote the imagine that inspired this, so much talent there and you’re feeding my Dalton addiction

Dalton was your friend. His primary art class was in the studio next to the orchestra rooms where you practiced in. He’d wandered in on you playing a section piece on the violin after he’d forgotten that his class was cancelled.

Since you two had obviously seen each other on multiple occasions when going to and leaving from class, he’d felt comfortable striking up a conversation. He usually wasn’t into initiating introductions, but Chris had started forcing him to interact with more people and make friends. You were the first person he had introduced himself to without her assistance.

In a way, he felt a sick sense of possession when it came to you because of that. It made him feel funny, like he was gross and he tried to stomp it down, but it would crawl it’s way up his throat whenever you talked to him. He’d met you all on his on, without a buffer or cleverly charming segue. You knew him for him from the get go, and still liked him. You liked him enough to start waiting for him before classes for a chat. You liked him enough to exchange contacts and let him take pictures of you to save for his own personal enjoyment put into his saved contacts.

You liked him enough to let him walk you back to your dorms every time he had the chance to. Which he did, considering he started walking a different path to insure that he would run into you more often.

He didn’t think he was odd, not really. Lots of friends took secret pictures of each other. For fun, it was funny, like a secret joke. And lots of friends walked together in between classes, it was normal. Even if they didn’t share certain classes. Or if one of the friends wasn’t completely aware that the other friend was nearby.

Dalton didn’t consider it strange that he didn’t like when you talked to Chris, or any of his other friends. Or anyone that might find you attractive. In his eyes, that should’ve meant everyone. You were gorgeous and people should be falling over themselves trying to be with you, in his opinion. But you were his. His friend, at least. And he hated not having your full attention.

Nighttime was the worst, in some ways. You two had met up on occasion to help each other study or wind down from an intense test. But most nights, you turned in early to spend time with your roommate. Dalton hated your roommate, she was so clingy and always convinced you to go back to the dorms, cutting off his time with you. He thought she was off, or at least very selfish, and that she used every opportunity to guilt you and take advantage of your kindness and naivety.

Dalton would never do that, he was lucky to get to be your friend. You were beautiful, talented, kind and accepting. You even accepted his ability of astral projection without hesitation. You were beyond perfect to him, and if he wasn’t with you, he was thinking about you. Constantly, and usually aloud, much to Chris’ annoyance.

“Dolphin! Please, for the love of fuck, ask that girl out already. You’re driving me nuts!” She threw herself back onto the spare bed in Dalton’s dorm in dramatic agony, groaning loudly in complaint.

“No, Chris. She’ll just think that I became friends with her because I wanted to get in her pants,” he dismissed, tossing a dirty t-shirt into his hamper a little too forcefully.

“Isn’t that what all guys do? What’s the big deal?” Chris sat up again to try to convince him. It wasn’t the first time either, but she was almost positive that you liked Dalton back and would rather you keep his mouth too occupied for him to verbally obsess over you. Like he was doing right now.

“I’m not going to do that, Chris. Just drop it.” His voice was unnervingly firm and Chris snapped her mouth shut before another incentive could fall out. Dalton was usually mild-mannered, at least when it came to anyone but his dad, not really the aggressive type. Anti-social and surly, but not aggressive. Unless it had something to do with you.

Chris thought there was something not quite right about Dalton’s crush on you but she figured his abnormal childhood and resulting trauma made it hard for him properly process his feelings. And she was reluctant to ask in case it set him off.

“I heard her roommate is going home to her parents’ for her dad’s birthday, maybe y’all can hang out more this weekend,” Chris suggested instead, unfettered by Dalton’s tone. “She left earlier this afternoon.”

Something seized in Dalton’s chest. You hadn’t mentioned that to him. You didn’t have a reason not to. Was there someone else? Were you going to spend the whole weekend with another guy? Did you have a boyfriend? Anger and hatred for this secret man clouded his mind and he felt like throwing something against the wall until it broke.

“I hadn’t heard about that,” he replied to Chris coolly. “I’ve got some homework to finish, do you mind?”

Chris nodded slowly, grabbing her bag and quickly making her way to the door, watching Dalton worriedly. She gave a half-hearted wave goodbye and left without a word.

As soon as the door shut, he quickly locked it, tearing his ball cap from his head and flinging thoughtlessly towards his desk, knocking over a small stack of his sketchbooks and a tin of water. Cursing under his breath, Dalton begrudgingly trudged to clean up the mess before the water could stain or damage any of his work.

After mopping up the water, he flipped through his drawings to check if any of it ruined the paper. One of the sketchbooks was relatively new, but nearly full of pencil and ink sketches. Of you.

Most of them took up an entire page of their own. They were innocent, somewhat, just candids that he’d done while or after hanging out with you. You smiling, laughing, playing the violin, biting your lip awkwardly. Gorgeous and sweet.

There were some other ones, smaller in comparison to the rest and done with a light hand. You changing through the window of your room. You bending over at work. You crying to your mom on the phone after you tore your favorite dress right before a date you ended up not going on. Done in a hurry by someone who was sketching without a still reference.

It was not stalking. No, he wasn’t like that. He didn’t threaten you or send you lewd messages. He didn’t get off on scaring you or making you feel unsafe. He wanted you to feel safe around him, did everything in his power to make sure you were always comfortable with him. Plus, he never invaded your privacy, he just looked. Watched. It was friendly, protective even.

Plus, those sketches were nothing compared to the rest. Small enough for three separate drawings to fit on a page, and darkly filled in with a heavy and rough hand.

It wasn’t intentional, not at first. He was a guy. You were his crush. He couldn’t control his own thoughts, let alone his dreams. It happened, and it was completely normal and natural. Not at all creepy or perverted.

He dreamt of you often. He couldn’t keep his mind off you even in his sleep. Of course, his unconscious mind was different than his conscious mind. Mostly, anyway. A lot more eager for you, hungry for you.

The pencil drawings were of you as you appeared to him in his dreams. Bent over his desk, wearing a string of pearls and a sultry smile. You, on his bed with your legs spread out invitingly, your fingers scissoring your slick folds. There was even one featuring him, his lower face dripping with drool and your arousal as his tongue delved into your wet heat from under you. That one was his favorite, even if the drawing itself wasn’t exactly his best work skill-wise. He had a hard time balancing the pad with only one hand, which he was also using to draw.

Dalton sighed and picked up all of the sketch pads, putting them back where they were and collapsing on his back on his bed. He stared up at the ceiling, wondering if he should bring up your roommate leaving and confront you about not telling him. You must have had a good reason, right? It’s not like you were getting tired of him or anything. Right?

As he drifted further and further into his thoughts, the room became darker around him. Standing up to fix his lamp, he caught the sight of himself sleeping in his peripheral. He’d fallen asleep and accidentally projected.

He didn’t do so often anymore, the Further was a scary and dangerous place and he was cautious of bringing something back with him. But it had its advantages, for pranks or finding out things that others couldn’t. Surprisingly, he’d never used his ability to watch you. You were too pure and beautiful to see through the lenses of the Further, he liked seeing you surrounded by light and color, with no potential of evil spirits ruining the experience for him.

But just this once…

No! He couldn’t. He shouldn’t.

You trusted him, it would be so easy. And it’s not like he was trying to be a weirdo, he just wanted to see if you had plans that weekend without having to actually ask you. It would only be once, for a few minutes. He wouldn’t mess with you or your things. He would just listen in and leave.

He grabbed the lantern and walked out of his room. He could’ve found your dorm with his eyes closed, but since it was in a different building and he was traveling through the Further, it took him longer than he would’ve liked. But at least he didn’t encounter anyone. You lived on the second floor of your dorm house and yours was nicer and more expensive than his. You had your own bedroom and personal bathroom, not having to share with your roommate and the rest of your floor like Dalton did.

Your door was unlocked and after he entered your dorm, he locked it himself, knowing he’d have to unlock again it in order to leave. Your bedroom door was open and he could see you through it, sitting at your desk and typing on your phone. Silently and curiously, he peered over your shoulder to watch you text your roommate.

He rolled his eyes at seeing her contact but ignored it in favor of the messages being sent. Mostly average, just you being your considerate self and asking about her trip home. She, obviously, sent paragraph after paragraph detailing every insignificant second of her weekend away, not once asking anything about you. The entire conversation revolves around her and Dalton had to bite his tongue to avoid scoffing in your ear, which was inches from his mouth.

Finally she asked about you, specifically your plans for while she was gone. Luckily, she could serve a purpose for once, Dalton thought.

You mentioned work, homework and just relaxing and Dalton was tempted to leave and rid himself of his craving to kiss you. Then, he saw you type his name. You wanted to surprise him by inviting him over for a sleepover. Your roommate responded by teasing you about you and Dalton finally progressing to the next stage in your friendship; a relationship.

Huh, maybe your roommate wasn’t as bad as Dalton thought she was.

Dalton’s heart was racing as he continued to read all of your roommate’s suggestions for extremely sexual twists on common sleepover activities, all in order to seduce him. You didn’t have to try to seduce him, but trying any one of these wouldn’t hurt. He felt his cock hardening in his pants and knew that he probably should’ve left. Like, now.

But then you sighed loudly into the empty air. Your head dropped back, your lips parted and you shifted awkwardly in your seat, your thighs pressing together tightly. Dalton felt his mouth water just watching you and suddenly stopped in his tracks. He decided that he would wait until you either went to the bathroom or fell asleep. If he tried leaving before then, you might catch him.

So he stood off to the side and simply observed you from up close. You seemed more deflated when you weren’t around him, less animated and poise. Less…cheery. You continued to stay at your desk texting your roommate for a while before getting up for a glass of water. It seems like she was going to bed. You paced around the kitchen as you sipped your drink, looking slightly anxious about how the conversation ended. Dalton regretted not reading it along with you and now he couldn’t because your phone was off and locked.

Huffing out a tense laugh to yourself, you marched back into your room, passing Dalton to get to your phone. You continued pacing as you opened up your messages and scrolled until you found a particular contact, hesitating for a moment and then opening the chat thread. Dalton stood in front of you this time and read his own name from upside down. Why were you pausing when it came to texting him? Did this happen often? We’re you inviting him over?

He watched you type out a greeting and began pacing in your room. When the message delivered, Dalton panicked before remembering that his phone was next to his actual body. You wouldn’t catch him over his phone notifications sounding off in your otherwise silent room.

You turned off your phone and sat on your bed, your back straight and your eyes staring out into nothingness. Your leg bounced erratically and you started checking your phone every thirty seconds in case you missed his message. You were waiting for a response from him, Dalton realized. And he couldn’t do that while he was standing here with you.

Now was definitely the time to go and you gave him the perfect opportunity when you started collecting your things to take a shower, muttering to yourself about how desperate you were. It was clear that you were agitated from waiting on his message, and he supposed it was because he hardly ever took more than 20 seconds to start typing back. He only took long if he was busy, and he would always tell you beforehand if he was.

As much as he wanted to watch you undress yourself and shower, becoming aroused slightly once more at the idea, he wouldn’t cross that boundary when you were so vulnerable and unaware. It was completely different from the times he watched you change your shirt or remove your bra from outside your window. He was in your home and you were going to be completely naked. Dalton wanted go reserve that honor for when you would strip in front of him eagerly, at least for the first time he ever saw you naked.

*~*~*

Gasping, Dalton sat up in his own bed, his erection pressing against his sweats and his body feeling sweaty. He immediately opened his messages and read your message asking him what he was doing. Getting his own clothing, he walked to the common bathroom in his dorm house and stripped, sending you a picture of his shower stall with the reflection of his bare torso halfway in the frame.

He’d never been so forward with you before. You’d seen him shirtless on occasion, he wasn’t shy about his body, but never on purpose and he hardly ever sent you pictures instead of just telling you what he was doing. But now that he knew you felt the same way he did, he felt confident enough to give actual signals to tell you that.

He turned on the shower and waited for the ancient water settings to actually heat up the water. As he was about to step in, you messaged him back with a photo of your own.

You were wearing nothing but a robe, tied at the waist, but doing a very poor job at concealing your cleavage, and your hair was soaked. The mirror that you had taken the picture in was fogged and he could see streams of steam swirling in the air around your head. So you liked really hot showers, fuck, that was attractive to him. You smiled shyly into the camera with one of your hands clutching a towel in your hands.

You: “I just got out of the shower, how funny is that?”

God, you were adorable without even trying. He wondered if the placement of your robe was intentional or if you were just that sexy without trying to be. It could go either way, you were as effortlessly cunning as you were absurdly oblivious to your affect on others.

He quickly went through his shower routine quickly, not taking his time to enjoy the water and relax like he usually did. He didn’t want to keep you waiting again. He decided to toe the line of flirtation and idle conversation once more by sending you another photo. This time following your lead with a mirror pic. He was still shirtless and brushing his teeth with an overly wide and sud-filled smile. His shorts hung low on his hips and his entire frame was centered in the photo this time.

D: “What’s up?”

It was a lame line, but he wanted to keep the conversation going and see if you were going to invite him over. He spit out his toothpaste and gargled mouthwash, accidentally swallowing some as you replied back. Coughing at the strong taste burning his throat, his eyes widened as he memorized every pixel of the photo you sent, catching on to his little provocation.

The mirror in your bathroom was still slightly fogged but he could clearly see that all you were wearing was a t-shirt. It was big enough to cover your thighs, so Dalton didn’t know what you were wearing under it and he could see your nipples poking through the material ever so slightly. He dragged his lip into his mouth and bit down hard, hand clenching on the edge of the counter. He gathered his shower stuff and walked back to his room, keeping his towel gathered in a ball in front of his crotch in case he ran into anyone this late.

It didn’t occur to him to read the message you sent until he was about to send one himself. He was so distracted by your selfie that he completely forgot that he was in the middle of a conversation with you. He wondered if it was weird to be more turned on by you in your pajamas than you soaking wet and in a towel.

You: “Nothing much? What are you doing right now?”

He sat down on his art stool, and angled the camera at the mirror that sat in the corner between his spare bed and the wall. He hadn’t gotten the motivation to actually put it up so it laid on its side and only showed from his waist down at this angle. The picture showed his bare stomach, shorts and legs, with one of his feet braced up on the leg of his seat.

D: “Chilling in my room now, you?”

You responded a minute later in much the same fashion. This photo didn’t show your face either, but he could see your hair and the junction between your neck and shoulder at the top of the photo. You were stretched out on your bed, your legs propped up in front of you and you holding the weight of your upper body on your other arm as you snapped a photo of yourself. From the way your shirt rode up on your thighs, you weren’t wearing any shorts, but he couldn’t see your underwear.

You: “Same. My roommate left to her parents’ house so I have the place to myself.”

Was this your way of implying that you wanted him to come over? How does he respond to that information without sounding weird or letting on that he’d already known? Should he tell you that he already knew? He decided that now was the perfect time to reorganize his desk and actually put up the mirror in his room. It took fifteen minutes for him to respond and the guilt ate at him now that he knew how you reacted when he didn’t message back quickly.

D: “Oh, really? Yeah, I kinda always have my place to myself, haha :)Look what I finally did.”

The added “haha” looked so stupid that he wanted to jump out his window. He hoped the selfie he sent to you would make up for it. He was standing in front of his mirror, acting as if he was only trying to show you the mirror you’d been bugging him about putting up. He was still shirtless and a light sheen of sweat made his body glow slightly from the exertion of his impromptu redecorating. He angled his phone to show a grin, but the rest of his face was covered.

You took a few minutes to respond yourself and Dalton thought he understood your anxiety about having to wait for messages. He felt the anxiety was all the more potent now that you were sending each other photos of yourselves. But he couldn’t deny that he liked the tension, the anticipation ate him up and he was beyond keyed up.

You: “I got bored being here by myself so I’m doing my makeup :p”

You: “Oml, finally!”

You were kneeling in front of the camera with your legs slightly spread. The lighting in your room made it hard for him to see what your underwear looked like and he felt like a pervert for being disappointed. Probably not as bad as he would’ve felt before he knew that you reciprocated his feelings. Your hair was put up into an updo so it was out of your face and it reminded him of that Pamela Anderson hairdo that you complained about not being able to do. You looked beautiful, your makeup was darker than you normally had it, more like dark seduction than pretty fairy. Dalton wondered if that was on purpose.

He sent you a closeup selfie of half of his face, his eyes mostly angled down at the phone screen instead of the actual camera and a slight smirk on his lips. His neck, collarbones and one of his shoulders were on display for you as well

D: “Guess I got bored too. Your hair looks like Pamela Anderson’s, btw”

D: “I like your makeup, it looks good!”

You responded quickly and without a photo.

You: “Are you joking me?! The one time I’m not bending over backwards trying to do it right…”

Dalton had to take a minute to recover from the mental image of you bending over backwards, particularly the image of how your breasts would look at that angle when your next message came in with another photo.

You: “Come over?”

This time, your phone was placed close to the floor and angled up for Dalton to see your knees pulled up to your chest and you dramatically and exaggeratedly pouted at the camera, your dark red lips shining in the camera flash. The flash also, probably unintentionally, highlighted the junction between your legs and he could actually see your panties this time. White lace. Son of a bitch!

Instead of responding, he jumped around his room and tried to gather all of his shit to take to your place and was pulling up his jacket when he noticed some papers on his bed. His homework that he had told Chris about earlier and completely forgot about. It was due at midnight and his teacher was a hardass about homework.

“Fuck!” His curse echoed loudly in his empty and otherwise silent room and he slammed his things down on the bed in anger.

As desperate as he was to go to your room and potentially spend the night inside you, he was stuck inside his dorm unless he wanted his grade to tank. With a heavy heart and tense motions, he sat in his chair, a different one from his stool, and faced his mirror. He spread his legs so that he was man-spreading and propped a leg up on the edge of his bed. He held up his homework in one hand above his head and made a faux-angry face at the camera, his expression not even making at dent when it came to showing just how angry he actually was. He gave himself a minute of fantasizing about your lips kissing marks all over his body before snapping the picture and sending it to you.

D: “I was on my way when I remembered I had homework. Fucking sucks! Raincheck? I’ll bring you breakfast in the morning?”

He ordinarily didn’t curse over text, or in general. He wasn’t a prude about swearing, but he just didn’t feel the need to do it. However, he also needed you to understand that he wasn’t blowing you off, and then he genuinely was upset about not being able to spend the night with you. He felt it was probably too risky sending you a picture where he was very obviously at half-mast and worried that he was being too forward and would make you uncomfortable.

Two minutes of complete agony imagining all of the ways that you would dismiss him and tell him to forget about it, or get angry and misinterpret what he was telling you. Now that the conversation couldn’t go anywhere, the anticipation wasn’t alluring and fun, it felt like acid burning his skin.

You: “Oh, please do your homework! Grades are important. Breakfast sounds good! Goodnight x”

A kiss, you messaged him a kiss. And you were completely fine with it. For the first time in his life, Dalton felt the urge to do a chest bump with a bro. He was on top of the world right now. He was tempted to rush his homework and run over to you as soon as possible, but as soon as he sat down to do it, he knew that the assignment required all of his time and attention. Fortunately, the assignment itself was relatively simple, but it was incredibly time consuming, which is why he’d been putting it off.

Two hours later, he took some pictures of his completed homework and sent them to his professor’s email. It was fifteen minutes til midnight and he wondered if he should risk going over to you now. You weren’t expecting him, though, and for all he knew, you were asleep or something. He debated texting you that he was done and seeing if you’d extend the invitation to come over again, but you hadn’t even brought up his last picture and that made him a bit insecure. What if you were trying to just ignore it as a way to say you weren’t interested? Even back in your room, when your roommate was encouraging you to take advantage of having your dorm to yourself, you had only denied all of her sexual innuendos. He knew you liked him back, but maybe sending you a picture of like the one he sent was too much too fast?

Oh yeah, astral projector. He could always just pop in and check without actually having to check. It was fine the first time, right? No big deal anymore. He wasn’t hurting anyone.

He relaxed on his bed and before long, he was picking up that lantern once more and leaving his body behind, making sure that all of his lights were on to protect his body before he left the room.

You had been in your room with your door mostly closed when he came in again. You really should make sure your front door was locked, he thought. He heard little whimpers coming from your room and was immediately concerned, automatically assuming that you were crying. Your bedroom door was swaying on account of the industrial fan that you insisted was the only thing strong enough to keep you cool at night. He had no problem opening your door and putting it back in place, making it look completely natural in case you noticed.

From what he could see, you were looking at your phone and were mostly covered by your blanket. Only one of your hands was holding your phone, which Dalton found odd because you normally preferred using both hands. Finally seeing your face, Dalton noticed that you had no tears on your cheeks or in your eyes. You weren’t crying. What the hell were you looking at on your phone?

Him. You were looking at a picture of Dalton that he’d sent to you. More accurately, you were looking at the second photo he had sent you, the one where he was brushing his teeth. It took Dalton several moments to begin thinking again to put the dots together.

Oh. Oh.

Just as Dalton registered what you were actually doing, you threw your blanket aside in frustration and essentially showed him that he was correct. He watched in rapt fascination as you rubbed your clothed center over your panties with two fingers. You kept focused on your phone, swiping over to the photo of him after he hung up his mirror, as your index fingers slipped beneath your lacy white underwear and into your slick heat. Your breathing was loud and shallow, the occasional moan slipping through as you touched yourself.

Dalton should not be here. He knew that. He knew what was and what wasn’t appropriate, his mom made sure he knew how to respect women, so he knew what he was doing was the furthest thing from okay. He also knew that he would have to be dragged by his teeth to get him out of your room. His cock swelled and twitched from under his shorts as he stood over, watching you masturbate to a picture of him. In the low lighting of your mostly dark room, he could see the shine of your wetness on your fingers and over your folds. He wanted to drag his tongue over your labia and savor every drop you gave him. It was all for him, after all, he was entitled to it.

You groaned in annoyance through your teeth and yanked your panties down your legs. Dalton’s severely dilated gaze zeroed in on them and he made a mental note to grab them before he left when your shirt joined it in the floor. You were completely nude and sitting up on your bed, in a very similar position to the photo where you had shown him your makeup. He’d never look at it again without thinking of this. He wished he had a picture of this.

You looked like a goddess or some kind of celestial siren as you arched your back and groped at one of your breasts and toyed with your clit. The chill of your room and the sudden banishment of your blanket had your flesh covered in goosebumps and your nipples hard. Dalton wanted nothing more than to cover your body with his and discover new forms of pleasure using his tongue, hands and cock. You were everything, you surrounded him and took up so much everything. And yet, he wasn’t actually with you, no matter how much he wished he could be. He didn’t know why he couldn’t try, you were his now. You admitted to it. Maybe not to him directly, and maybe you didn’t know he was there, but it didn’t make it any less true.

Dalton approached your bed and was about to rest his weight on it when you grabbed a decorative throw pillow from the mountain of pillows you had on your bed. You shoved it between your legs and adjusted it so that the woven seams pressed between your folds. You rested your weight on it and rolled your hips experimentally to find a rhythm and angle that felt best. Soon, you were panting and gasping, and Dalton could barely hear you over the stupid fan.

As you rode the pillow, Dalton lost his restraint. He either had to take care of himself now and fully condemn himself as an actual peeping tom and a pervert, or take care of you and risk you freaking out and losing you before he could actually have you. He’d rather hate himself for a little while than you hate him forever. He reached into his shorts, cupping his erection and squeezing lightly. He bit his lips and tried to keep quiet. He didn’t think he would last long, and he didn’t really care to either. He’d worry about that once he was actually inside you.

Dalton started off with slow and trading strokes before working up to the rhythm you set for yourself. You were grinding down on the pillow with slow and long thrusts, lowering your body slightly so that the seam of the pillow rubbed your clit. Dalton imagined his face replacing the pillow and started speeding up the movements of his hand, spitting on himself to help his hand move more fluidly along his shaft. Coincidentally, you started to quicken as well, humping the pillow desperately instead of steadily rolling your hips.

“Dalton! Oh…fuck! Daltonnn…” you cried out softly into the seemingly empty room. As the waves of your orgasm crashed over you, you lost strength in your arms and fell to the mattress, your hips still moving rhythmically as you came. Your limbs felt electrocuted and twitchy, and you could do nothing but gasp and whimper as you came down from your high. Rolling over, you reached down and caressed your soaked folds, moaning softly as your fingers became coated in the stringy remnants of your wetness.

Dalton nearly fell to his knees in his desire to suck your fingers into his mouth and devour your cunt. Luckily, he managed to stay upright and went rigid as he came in his hands, making sure the pearly white spurts of semen didn’t make a mess anywhere in your room, if they could. He wasn’t actually entirely sure how it all worked when he was in this state, but he wasn’t going to risk it.

He waited until you fell asleep to grab your panties and leave your dorm, falling back into his own body and finding it a mess. His shorts were soaked at the crotch with his cum because his actual hands couldn’t stop his real orgasm from staining his clothes. He tore off his shorts and decided to sleep naked, hiding your panties in his pillow case.

*~*~*

You woke up refreshed and well-rested the next morning, still not used to the stillness and quiet in the absence of your roommate, Carla. Usually, she was up by now blaring metal music while she got ready for the day and you would make the two of you breakfast. You went to do just that when you heard a knock at your door and remembered that Dalton was supposed to come over with breakfast.

You told him to wait through a text message and grabbed a pair of athletic shorts, yanking them on as you made your way to let him in. Much to your surprise, the door was unlocked, though you don’t remember leaving it that way. In all fairness, you also don’t remember the last time you had locked it, so it was fair game.

Dalton greeted you with a large smile, showing off his extended canines, and a bag from your favorite pastry shop. It was hard not to blush after what you did when you saw the pictures he sent you, but the food was also distracting. You excitedly took the bag from him and started rifling through it as he guided the both of you to your room. Had he ever been inside your dorm before? How did he know which room was yours?

Before you could ask him, he plopped himself onto your bed and settled onto his stomach. He then used a pillow to prop up his chin. The same pillow you had used last night.

There was something about the way he was smiling at you. The way he was watching you.

“So, did you sleep well last night?”

********

Lemme know if you want a part two or maybe a “What if Dalton hadn’t had any homework?” situation.

This was super fun and sorry if it’s too long

#Spotify #romance #dalton lambert #insidious films #insidious: the red door #dalton lambert x reader #dalton lambert imagine #dalton lambert fic #dalton lambert smut #smut #stalking #pervert!dalton

[spliffymae]

WRITTEN OFF.

synopsis: you know, there’s a reason the famous saying is “absence makes the heart grow fonder”

⚠️ swearing, mentions of cheating, smut, car sex, the words “cock”, “panties” and “pussy” are used here lmao. minors dni 18+ !

kio’s notes - THIS IS THE FINAL PART. this was also my 100th post 🥹

pts. 1 , 2 , 3 , 4

now playing

⊱ ──────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.}──────── ⊰

you were quiet on the drive to your house, toji even worrying about you. the makeup you spent hours on had run from your tears. you didn’t bother wiping it, you just sat with your head against the window and accepted it.

instead of turning to your street, toji continued to drive past. you noticed and sat up. “you missed the turn.” you said softly, looking at the side of your ex’s face. but he didn’t seem to care.

“toji….my house—”

“going to mine.” he mumbled. he knew megumi and rin had long left, and he wanted to reconcile tonight without the pressure of the kids, and the possibility megumi could hear you two.

you took a deep breath, “toji, i agreed for you to drive me home. your house is not my home.”

“(y/n), megumi is sixteen right now. do you know how old he was when you first watched him?…nine. we started dating when he was ten. i proposed to you when he was thirteen, and—.”

“cheated when he was 16.” you added a bitter chuckle, “s’that where you were going with that bit?”

toji couldn’t take it anymore!

as if an instinct, a reflex, he jerked the car off the road and pulled over on the shoulder, startling you. “what the fuck!”

he didn’t say anything. he cut the engine and turned his attention to you, leaning over the cars console to be closer. “i am sick of this! sick of your attitude, of this separation, of this disconnect. you are my wife, (y/n). and we are going to work this out because i cannot lose you, okay? i won’t lose you. i know you want to, i see it when you look at me. yeah, you hate me and want me away, but i see the part of you that craves me, our family back together. so let’s work on it. let me prove i can be who you need me to be, who you want me to be.”

it was quiet. you were processing. toji rarely spoke like this, at most you saw this side of him after sex. this softer side. “(y/n)…” toji put his hand on your thigh, getting your leg to tense up from his touch. you bit back the sob that tried to crawl it’s way out your mouth. you had new tears running down your cheeks, trying your best to blink them away. how his touch was able to bring you to tears, you don’t know. but it was a mix of emotions: happy to feel his warmth back on your body; sad to know you weren’t as over him as you thought; pissed to know he probably touched the other woman like this.

his other hand stretched over to cup your cheek and turn your head to him. you didn’t look at him, you stared at his hand on your thigh. “mama, i’m so sorry.” his voice was shaky, and that made you finally look up to see he had the glossiest of eyes.

he was sober enough to drive—he had driven home in worse conditions then two and a half mugs of beer, but his emotions were all over the place. you always had a way of bringing out his vulnerability. and while usually he would wait ‘til after you two climaxed to relish in his feelings with you, his tears burned his eyes now. you hadn’t seen him cry since rin’s birth, but seeing you this way and knowing he was the cause was cracking his guilt ridden heart.

he pulled your head to him and as your foreheads touched, he realized you were allowing him to touch you. to be closer to you. “i meant when i said i hate you. i want you to feel every burning pain i felt in my heart.” you were angry, your voice was shaky, and you glared at him as if he were the last person you’d want to be with. and quite frankly, he was. “i want to break you the way you broke me.”

toji let out a nervous sigh. he didn’t remove himself from you, though. “and the most annoying thing is i can’t.” you shrugged in defeat, a watery smile on your face. “i can’t bring myself to hurt you that way because no one deserves that. and i know now that i didn’t deserve that.” you sniffled, “i was everything you needed me to be. i gave you everything, fushiguro.”

his thumb swipes at the tear stains on your cheek, gently wiping them away. he gave you a peck on your lips. it was one that turned to two, and then three. he prompted you to kiss him back, but you held your ground.

until he began to lead his kisses from your lips to your jaw. you instinctively tilted your head so he had more space to kiss you. his eyes shone with hope at your action. “you were and you didn’t deserve it, baby. m’so sorry. just…break me back, (y/n). i don’t care, do whatever you gotta do to me so that i can have you back. i need my family back.”

things changed quick. toji grabbed your thigh possessively, earning a whimper from you. a sound he hadn’t heard in months, and one that had his dick twitch in his boxers. his lips left wet kisses along your neck as his hands explored your body. he unbuckled your seatbelt and gripped at your waist, “c’mere, mama. needa feel you again.”

there was a war going on in your body. a war between your mind, heart, and pussy. your mind was against this ordeal, hated how his hands felt on you. but your heart loved it. it melted at his touch and kisses. and your pussy? ol’ girl was dripping for toji, wanting to feel him back inside you again. it has been so long since you last took care of your sexual needs. you weren’t looking for casual flings, and it was difficult to have when you were devoting all your time to being a single mother. alas, it was two to one, and you let the majority win as you kicked off your heels and moved to sit in his lap. your mind would get you back tomorrow, but for now you didn’t care.

“my beautiful wife. missed ya s’much baby.” the fat of your ass was squished in his big palms, his grip earning a hiss from you. he stopped his feverish kisses to nuzzle into the crook of your neck and smell the familiar cinnamon vanilla scent of your body wash and matching lotion. a scent he longed to have back on his clothes.

his hands fiddled with the hem of your dress, fingers dipping in to graze your inner thighs. “toji please.” you pleaded.

“what do you want, ma? you can have anything you want, so tell me.” his finger poked at your clit through your panties and a shiver rolled up your spine.

“you, toji. just gimme you.” you cupped his face, tilting his head up to connect your lips in a kiss. you hadn’t kissed him months, his taste having left your brain.

but nothing about you left toji’s. not the way you would kiss him like it hurt, like you wanted to transfer all your feelings onto him. or the way you bit his bottom lip as you pulled back from him, or the way you would whimper and paw at his aching cock through his pants. he could never forget how desperate you became when turned on; how your hand reached down to the control that would push his seat all the way back and give you better room to straddle him. you had fucked in this car many times, many nights and even days. so all this was like muscle memory for you two.

toji’s hand went under your dress to your panties, to feel the silk material against his fingertips and snarl. “ya wore this f’him, hm? my favorite dress and your good panties…for that pink-haired lil’ fuck?”

he pushed your panties to the side, fingers immediately dipping into your warm pussy to fondle it. it had been so long since he last touched you like this—since he touched anyone. after the separation he took interest in no one other than you, something he kicked himself for not doing that dreadful night.

“i-is this,” you swallowed the lump in your throat as he worked your clit between his index and middle finger. “is this what you did…with her?” you choke out, just as his two fingers pushed into your pussy.

“ah—.” you hissed, grabbing at his shoulder. you couldn’t help to ask, and you knew it’d make him angry…but how could you not? yeah, the woman means nothing to toji, meant nothing to toji in comparison to you.

but what toji failed to realize up until this point was she meant everything to you. she was the one he seeked pleasure in, a comfort he no longer found with you. she was the one that—even if just for a moment, made him forget all about you and his family. so yeah, while toji couldn’t even remember her name, you were haunted, with her in your memory for what felt like eternity.

he stopped his movements and leaned back away from you. his answer to this question would make or break this reunion you two had going on. he could see how your eyes held desperation. practically pleading for him to tell you to your face.

“i told you, she only sucked my dick, baby. i wore a condom too and just fucked her face to get out my frustrations wit’chu s’all. wouldn’t think about fucking someone else. not when i have you. only one i want to be with like that, ‘kay? only one for me.“

and you nodded. you felt slight relief he didn’t have full blown sex. in some twisted way it seemed to ease the pain a bit. but toji knew that it was wrong to downplay what he did that night, but he knew admitting to his infidelity would destroy you. and he refused to do that after he just got you back. so as far as you needed to know, all he did was get head.

you let out a nervous sigh before your hands fiddled with his belt buckle. “don’t wanna wait. just need you to fuck me.” you mumbled as your hand slid into his boxers and gripped his cock. you had forgotten how thick he was, your hand just barely wrapping around him. toji hissed at your touch.

“i need to prep you, baby, you know this. you’ll get hurt.” he tried to stop you as you pulled out his dick but you slapped his hand away. he had lifted his hips and pulled his pants and boxers down a bit so he could be properly free.

you said nothing as a response. no, words weren’t enough to show him how much you didn’t care. you instead looked at the way his dick was against his covered abs. how the thick vein that ran along his shaft was on full display. you took it in in your hands and lowered your head.

toji’s mouth fell open at the globs of saliva you spat directly on the head of his cock. his toes curled at the way you twisted your hand around him, spreading your spit and properly lubing him up. “m’already hurt.” you mumbled more-so to yourself as you fidgeted around and positioned him at your entrance. he knew what you meant, and fuck, did it kill him to hear.

toji stared at you with low eyes, licking the scar on his lip when he felt you glide the mushroom head between your folds. he could hear the noise it made as it slid to your clit, and he bucked up to nudge it, earning a quiet whimper from you.

“c’mon pretty,” he sat up to bury his face in your neck. the smell was intoxicating, and he was slowly kissing and sucking your neck as a means to almost taste it. to taste you. “let me be in my sweet girl again, my beautiful wife.”

there would be moments between you and toji, where the roles seemed to flip for a minute. he normally called the shots in the bedroom but you would get control from time to time. it wouldn’t be for long, but he loved when the moment came. you were so demanding it made him almost consider becoming a switch. almost.

you kept your eyes on him and hand around his neck as you slid down slowly. there was a slight burn felt as you adjusted to his size. your pussy had forgotten just how big he was. it wasn’t a discomfort though. you were grinning through the pain, your tongue gliding across your teeth.

“shit, mama. forgot how much this little cunt loves to squeeze me.” he spoke through gritted teeth. he bit his lip to hold back the moan he wanted to let out as you squeezed the side of his neck.

when he bottomed out, toji’s fist hit his side of the car, “fuck.” he hissed. he bunches up the bottom of your dress, pushing it up to be around your stomach so he could watch your pussy take him in. he let you have your control for about five minutes, but when he sensed you slowing down he reached out to wrap a large hand around your neck.

he pulled you to his lips, the most sloppiest of kisses being shared between the two of you. he began to thrust up into you, his pace fast and creating sounds that filled the car.

“toji—.” you cried, tears pricking the end corners of your eyes as you sucked on your bottom lip. toji had a devilish smirk on his face. “oh my goddd, you feel so good, baby.” you were a breathless mess. his hands had a firm grip on your hips and moved you to match his thrusts.

“take your tits out, mama. need ‘em now.” he panted against your ear, biting your earlobe after. you did as told, pulling down the straps of your dress and pulling it off your breasts, holding one of your titties to his mouth.

“look at em. so fucking fat.” he breathed out with a smile. he knew breastfeeding would make your breasts bigger—hell they were big prior to him knocking you up, but it had been so long since he last saw you like this. the pillowy mounds before him were getting his mouth to water. his tongue dampened his lips before he wrapped them around your nipple with a grunt of satisfaction.

“o-oh my god, tojiii!” you threw your head back, cradling his head in your hold as his tongue flicked your hardened bud. he was like a man starved, forced to go without what he longed for the most. he couldn’t get enough of you. not your taste, definitely not the way you had an almost vice grip on his dick and his heart.

“oh fuck, (y/n). just like that baby.” his voice was muffled against your chest, but from the way he started to get off-beat with his thrusts, you could feel he was close.

“can i come in you, hm? let me remind her how much she missed having me dripping outta her, down your legs? pleaseee, mama. let me fill you back up.” he was begging like a bitch, something you rarely witnessed, but something that never failed to bring you to an earth shattering orgasm.

“ oh shit!—toji m’cummin.” your tits bounced in his face as he randomly placed kissed along your chest and shoulders. he had wrapped his arms around you and leaned back in the seat, taking over fully and delivering the hardest thrusts to your sopping cunt.

you screamed, nails digging into his jaw and mouth opened against his own. you couldn’t kiss him, you couldn’t remember how to. not when he was fucking his permanent place into your pussy.

“feel ya clamping down, love. holding me so good i can’t hold it any longer.” he wasn’t thinking of making you cum first like he usually would, not when he was on the verge of probably the best climax of his life. emotions were high, tension was too. the scene couldn’t be anymore intimate, any more explicit and obscene.

the car windows were fogged up, with only your handprints against it. toji was groaning, mindlessly spitting out profanities as he watched your juices slightly squirt out every time he buried himself in you. “fuck, m’cummin, gonna be so much.” he said with a whine.

“toji!” you cried, “don’t cum in me, please baby.” you were breathless, but the order was heard. toji honestly didn’t know how to feel. you were begging, and the tone was what he wanted, but what you were saying wasn’t.

he was going to say something to you, he was, but then he felt that clench you did around him, and the way your fingernails digged into the nape of his neck. you were whimpering, lips to his as you rode through your orgasm. he quickly pulled out of you, the rough and fast action getting you to flinch, but you had no time to think about it before he was fisting himself to cum on your puffy clit, a carnal groan coming from him as he watched his cum cover you.

nothing but your choked sobs covered with his moans and heavy pants were heard in the car. he grabbed a fistful of your hair and brought you into a surprisingly rough kiss.

“oh fuck.” you had fallen on him once your orgasm passed, lying on him and mindlessly placing small kisses to his neck. he was mumbling incoherently, eyes shut and mind focused on the way you pulsed over his thigh.

“she—she has your prominent features.” he said out of nowhere, the comment getting you to stare at him quizzically.

“hm?”

“rinny. she looks like you because she has your nose and lips, y’r prominent features. her eyes are ‘gumi’s. filled with wonder, curiosity.” he was still trying to catch his breath throughout his words. “been wanting to say that to you for a while now, how much she looks like you two.”

he sighed, “i get…scared that she’ll forget me. forget she has a dad.” his finger was tracing shapes along your thighs, his mouth speaking his bottled up fears to you. you had forgotten just how vulnerable he got after sex. almost as if he was too tired to keep his guard up.

“she knows her daddy, toji. she loves you.” you reassured him, giving his shoulder a reassuring rub.

“do you still love me?” he was so scared for your answer. because what was stopping you from just using him as some fuck toy then dipping out his life for good? after all you did tell him to pull out. he had so much work to do to show you his change, to show you just how bad he wants to change.

“to the point that it hurts.” you said as your finger traced over the scratch marks you left on his shoulder and neck. you were being truthful. loving toji had to be one of the most rewarding pains you’ve ever experienced, right after motherhood. you would give and he would take, but never return. it was like a test; how much more can you endure from this…would you call it a voluntary sacrifice? yeah because that’s what love is, a sacrifice.

you sacrificed your future for toji and megumi, and now for rin. you gave your time, your heart, your body, and your strength. all of you was in the man you lied on. while you listened to the steady beats of his heart, you knew yours matched his pattern—it was your heart he had after all. this was a test on your resilience for loving toji. how much more could you endure because of how you felt about him?

it seemed he would never be the toji you dreamed of. the one that would be vulnerable outside of the bedroom, the one who would open up to you when things get tough instead of running off. the toji you had thought he was, the one who would never hurt you the way he did.

“do you love me?” you looked up at him, watching the way his eyes dropped to meet yours.

“more than life itself.” he kissed your nose, the sentiment making you softly smile. you two stayed connected for a little bit more, the sound of passing cars along the road and the nights wind being the only sound you two needed.

you focused on him, and how he felt under you. how your bodies seemed to mold together, your hearts beat the same. you couldn’t help your mind drifting to earlier though, and thinking about your date, and if you would’ve let it get this far with sukuna if toji didn’t show up.

the person you went on the date with was bad, yeah, but you enjoyed going out. you enjoyed getting to know someone new and start over. it was refreshing. hell, if sukuna played his cards right you might’ve just kissed him tonight. but you’ll never know now that you’ve gone and left with toji.

as if he could read your mind, toji tensed up a bit from under you, “i will be the husband and father you and our kids need me to be, (y/n). i promise.” he spoke into your hair, his hold on you tightening in the slightest. almost like his stamp of confirmation that you had his word.

but you didn’t respond. you had no response.

he knew this one night of passion wasn’t going to make up for what he did. you weren’t just going to forget his wrongdoings like it was nothing. he needed to prove to you he has learned from his mistake. he needs to show you, show megumi and keep his promise to geto; that he is a different man. he was going to work his ass off to get his family back.

and he would spend every second, and exhaust every resource he had until he was back under the same roof as you, as his children, and back to being a prominent figure in your life. he was going to work his ass off to write himself back in your heart, and continue the love story you two started.

if only he knew what you were thinking.

toji still ain’t shit sorry if you were expecting character development 😭

but thank you all again for vibing w this story, i appreciate it.

tags • @mollyville @miyaluv127 @lemmetreatya @tojisfav @aizawa19 @cloudsinthecosmos

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