#i have much more to say about NH but ill leave it at that and ive ranted abt it so much

[neomedievalist]

sorry for being a rando popping into your inbox but wrt your posts about smt5 and the acnh effect, as a lifelong fan of animal crossing i hard agree on nh and it's kind of depressing to see so many people say it's the best animal crossing when it isnt even CLOSE. id say the downfall of ac started with new leaf since thats when they started lobotomizing the villagers, but acnl actually had tons and tons of content that kept me playing for literal years. meanwhile with nh i only popped in to check out the new updates then stopped playing. i could write an entire essay on how they completely gutted the original tone that animal crossing had with its writing and overall vibes and basically sanitized a fun, unique quirky little game into being The Relaxing Game.

with smt5, i think the problem is something different though. if you read the interviews from very early in v's production, the devs mention things they wanted to be in the story--namely, they wanted v to touch on themes of extremism in modern society and how in the face of the world being on fire gen z and millennials feel utterly hopeless and like they have no future. none of that was in the final product. granted, i have very little knowledge of game development but since v was in production prior to and during the pandemic, i have a theory that there was meddling on the part of corporate that really messed with the development process with the pandemic on top of that. according to a friend of mine, someone data mined v and there were a ton of unused assets and concepts, which seems to support my idea that there was a huge shift mid development that squandered v's potential.

one thing though, is that new people getting into smt though v means that they're more likely to play the other games in the series and see what it's like when smt's potential is realized, whereas this doesnt really exist for animal crossing since animal crossing is generally the same all around where each smt game has a vastly different story and tone from the other games.

(i might be misinterpreting but one criticism i have of your addition to that one post if you describing this phenomenon as Kirby On The Switch when as a lifelong kirby fan the most recent kirby game was unironically a near perfect game and most people seem to be in agreement on that and it was clear that hal labs put a TON of love and work into making it. but sadly kirby and the forgotten land is an exception to what you were talking about on that post)

sorry for the essay lol i just have Thots

HI YES thoughts appreciated! everyone always welcome to drop essays about video games in my inbox i love writing them and i love reading them

i wouldnt call myself a lifetime ac fan but i played the FUCK out of new leaf, i think i got it in 2014 and i have about 1000 hours in it, which is why i was so dissapointed with NH...and ive heard and understand peoples criticism of NL so it must be really really rough for old ac fans to see NH just double down on all that.

that's really interesting about smtv though, i hadn't heard that about the datamining and stuff? and i guess the original interview i hadnt seen because i wasnt into smt then LOL. i actually am gnna go look at that because it really does feel like a game that went thru development hell and had to rush things, i remember before release being really worried that we hadnt gotten any story trailers or english va announcements...esp since the game was announced at the same time as mario odyssey LOL

and yes thats very true that people might get into smt thru smtv. i definitely agree with that point but at the same time, someone is equally likely to not really click with it then drop it and not touch the series again... but well. not the point.

about kirby i was honestly thinking about that when i was posting it, i havent played the forgotten land but every kirby fan i know loves it (i was actually thinking of picking it up myself as a 3d platformer fan) so yeah i can def see how thats an exception. it is true that really good games with passion behind them still can come out which is really heartening, i wish it wasnt such a surprise when it happened!

but yes i think animal crossing really embodies this point. the way its become a cultural icon and people dont know what the series USED to offer so they think that NH is good and what they're all like is so dissapointing, especially as a life sim that youre meant to put tons of time into... it frustrates me to no end when i see people joking abt AHh i have no motivation to go back to my island its so much work i havent played in so long.. like this wouldnt have HAPPENED if the game wasnt shit!! i never had "no motivation" to play new leaf because it was an actual game and not a halfway between life sim and sandbox game that is the worst of both worlds! i checked in on new leaf EVERY. DAY. after school when i was in high school and id play for an hour each day. i dont think i missed a single day in maybe three years.

in new horizons i told myself id go back to it if they ever added cooking. then they added cooking and i went back to it and it sucked so i stopped playing again

there is literally no reason to play it other than customizing your island as a sandbox game but the sandbox elements are so fucking miserable to play that you have to be, excuse me for saying this, unemployed to actually find the time to make your island look good. the game coasted on the fact that it released right before the pandemic and everyone had the free time to play it.

#data #anyway. tl;dr all true points! #i have much more to say about NH but ill leave it at that and ive ranted abt it so much

[lonelier-version-of-you]

Overall I liked this week’s episode. It wasn’t quite as strong as last week’s, but that may just be because I don’t like what they’ve been doing with Sah’s storyline. I really enjoyed everything else.

The Dylan stuff was absolutely fantastic. I love it and I love William Beck’s acting. And I am really, really glad the show is finally addressing Dylan’s mental health, because he’s been blatantly unwell for nearly 2 years at this point (going right back to when he was looking at houses for him and Faith in February 2021, a move I’m still baffled that people thought was romantic), and I was really worried it would just be swept under the rug, but no, it’s just been building up really slowly. Look, not that I want to sound happy that Dylan is ill, but I’d rather have him be ill and the show address it than have him be ill and the show not address it, so... yeah.

I also just love that the show is currently in a place where people on Twitter are whining that it’s “too political” every week. Mate, if you don’t want politics, fuck off and stop watching Casualty.

I expected after Dylan’s whole “I can’t fix the NHS but I can fix things here” speech a few weeks back that the show was going to quickly deconstruct that idea and show that Dylan actually has very little power in the grand scheme of everything, and I was right. His speech tonight calling back to that moment was WONDERFUL. I’m definitely gonna gif it. Probably won’t gif it right away, because tomorrow is Johnrik Day (AKA the “One Man And His God” anniversary) and I’ll be focusing on that (might make a little gifset of them, we’ll see), but I’ll gif it at some point.

Also, I said this already, but I find it both annoying and funny how they’re going out of their way to avoid acknowledging that Henrik left the hospital, while also not outright retconning the fact that he left the hospital. Hence, we’re getting all these mentions of the chairman and stuff thrown around, but nothing about the CEO. I’m begging you, Casualty, please just confirm that Henrik left. You don’t even have to tell us the actual name of the new CEO if you really can’t be bothered. Just give us a line that starts with “since Mr. Hanssen left...”, or have someone go “I’m gonna talk to the CEO about this and see what she thinks” to confirm it’s not Henrik anymore.

Anyway, diverting back from that tangent onto the topic of Dylan and his storyline, I loved Betty. I thought she was just lovely.

Paul was worried that what he said about Dylan could get him in trouble - let’s hope it does, because I want him to just leave already. Why is he still on the show? Having him punch Dylan, however unintentionally, just makes me hate him more.

I also hate Marcus, but he’s clearly a short-term character we’re meant to hate. Whereas Paul’s been here over a year and there’s still nothing likeable about him.

I liked all the patient storylines tonight. I especially liked the guy who had been taking his girlfriend’s contraceptive pills because he thought that would make extra sure she didn’t get pregnant. That was so cute. Silly, but cute.

The Sah stuff... the stuff with them being kidnapped was better than I expected, but I really didn’t like the stuff with their family. The kidnapping stuff reminded me of when Henrik was kidnapped just as much as I thought it would. His responses were not dissimilar. If I had a nickel for every time an autistic-coded queer Holbyverse medic got held hostage, I’d have two nickels, which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it’s happened twice.

As for the family stuff, I am glad Kevin survived the episode. I really expected him not to, so I was relieved that he did. But other than that... I am just so tired of storylines where trans people are expected to “make things up” and “reconcile” with their bigoted family members, even if in this case there were admittedly extenuating circumstances (which you can’t say for the similar storyline on Holby with Louis). Especially in this case, because Sah’s mother isn’t just bigoted, she left them alone when they were only a teenager and they needed her. Sorry, but she’s a terrible person. Sah has no obligation to forgive her.

Also, what the fuck was up with them having Jan misgender Sah? Jan has no reason to misgender Sah. She’s never ever had to call them by she/her, because she met them long after their coming out. They’ve been using they/them for as long as she’s known them. (I know some people just tend to mix words up, which could lead to unintentionally misgendering someone even if you’ve always known them by their current pronouns, but we’ve seen no sign of Jan being like that before from what I remember.) Add to that the fact that Jan is literally queer herself, and just... she should know better. Having her misgender Sah is not a good look.

Loved Sah’s new haircut, though, I’ve gotta say that.

There was very little Faith tonight, which pleased me. Honestly, I could almost forget she was in the episode. Hopefully she’s leaving and they’re phasing her out now to make sure no one will miss her - I can dream.

There was, however, not enough Stevie. I wanted more Stevie.

Anyway, there’s no episode next week, because of Strictly IIRC. So... next review whenever the next episode airs, lol.

#BBC Casualty #Dylan Keogh #Sah Brockner #Casualty spoilers

[orlamount]

Stages of grief

Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross is famous for the five stages of grief theory, which may help people to name their feelings and experiences inside of grief, but they were never meant to be a step-by-step prescription for how to move forward. The “stages” originated from Dr. Ross' observations of the experiences of terminally ill patients. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance reflect how people tend to cope with the reality of death and dying. They were never intended to offer a roadmap for grief. 

While I was researching, I found a really interesting quote which stood out to me and spoke to me a lot:

“There are really only two stages of grief, ... who you were before and who you are after.” Ted Rynearson.

I found out that many people equate grief with sadness, but grief is much, much more than sadness. We can feel any combination of emotions inside of grief, and all of them are OK. These are some examples of what can be felt during this time:

I watched a short video of Alesia Alexander (a grief, loss and inclusion consultant, talking about grief), she explains that all these different emotions we feel "Are part of your narrative and about how you get to the story of who are and how you are."

Megan Devine 'Psychotherapist and author of 'It's ok that you're not ok' stated that "Anything that anyone feels inside their own personal grief is correct"

This is a diagram of the grieving process. I think this visual expression is really clear to understand. It shows how messy it can be for some people. Similar to Radioheads music video, all these journeys through all these different emotions is almost like a representation of Thom Yorke entering through all these different door and experiences.

People talk about the five stages of grief as:

Denial

Anger

Bargaining

Depression

Acceptance

Denial

Some people feel numb after the death of a person they cared about. They may even try to carry on as though nothing has happened.

If you experience this, it could be because it's just too hard to believe that the person you know so well is not coming back. You may also still feel their presence and you may think that you have heard their voice or even seen them.

Anger

It is very natural to feel anger after someone dies. Death can seem really cruel and unfair. It can feel harder too if the person who died was too young to die, or if their death leaves you with a lot of responsibility or practical problems.

You may feel angry at the person who has died for leaving you, or be angry at yourself for things you think you didn't do right.

Bargaining

This is when some people who are grieving start making deals with themselves, or perhaps a god, if they are religious.

Maybe they promise themselves that they will now always do (or not do) something, believing that it could make the person who has died come back . Or maybe they believe it will stop anyone else dying − or other bad things happening. This is sometimes called 'magical thinking'.

People may also find that they keep going back over the past and ask lots of 'what if' questions, wishing that they could go back and change things so that they could have turned out differently.

Depression

Sadness and longing are the feelings we think of most when we think about grief. These feelings can be very intense and painful, and they may come and go over many months or years.

The NHS has information about recognising the signs of depression. But most people find that painful feelings like this become less strong over time.

Acceptance

As time passes, most people find that the pain of grief becomes less intense. They can accept that the person has died and that their life will carry on without them.

Rather than saying that grief ends, people often say that they learn to live with it. In time, their life is able to grow around their grief, and they are able to find enjoyment again while accepting that they will always miss the person who has died.

Where did the theory of stages of grief come from?

The psychiatrist Elisabeth Kúbler Ross was the first person to talk about stages of grief in her book On Death and Dying, published in 1969. In this book, she writes about the different emotions people may go through after they have been diagnosed with a terminal illness. So, she was not writing about grief after a bereavement.

In the decades since that book first came out, her stages of grief theory has been used to describe the way our emotions can change during the grieving process after a bereavement.

Does grief have stages?

How we grieve is completely individual and it's different for everyone.

There are no set stages that we all go through. And our feelings and emotions do not follow an order – they will come and go over time.

You may experience some of the things in the stages of grief model, or all of them – or you may have quite different emotions. For example, you may at first feel relief after the death of the person you loved, if they had been in pain, or if caring for them had become very difficult.

You may also experience other feelings such as guilt, or loneliness or anxiety. Read more about how you might feel when you're grieving.

Most of us find that our feelings come and go – this may feel chaotic or out of control, but usually these waves of feeling will become less intense over time.

The idea of moving from one stage to the next has not been my experience at all… They're all mixed in, but they're mixed in five a day. And then the next day you feel completely different.

Ella Does it help to think of grief as having stages?

We now know that talking about stages of grief, may not be helpful for people if they think it means they should feel a certain way at a certain time − or that their grief will follow a set order.

This could mean that you worry that you are grieving incorrectly even though there is no right or wrong way to feel when you are grieving.

People sometimes describe grief as a journey and you may be someone who finds it helpful to think of it as a journey with stages. The stages are then the emotions which dominate how you're feeling at different times. But they will come and go and will not follow in any set order.

Since people first started talking about the stages of grief theory, we have learnt about many other ways of understanding grief. Read more about understanding how grief feels.

#year3 #fmp

[digitalstowaway]

Nmj doesn't die au

But he does go through the qi deviation. Lxc goes to visit him, not shocked that it happened but shocked that nmj managed to survive. Even if he's just barely hanging on.

Jgy seems beside himself. Lxc comforts him, that he's been such a good friend. But he says let him look after nmj for a while.

Jgy is hesitant, he tries insisting that he's fine. He can continue playing for nmj. But lxc is like no, dear friend you've done so much already. I need to step up a little more. Rest.

And lxc sits with nmj and plays for him. Nmj starts doing better. He talks to lxc a bit and insists that jgy tried killing him.

Lxc doesn't take him too seriously. He thinks he's just delirious.

Until he runs into nhs when he's about to go back home. And nhs looks awful. Lxc hasn't seem the entire time he's been there, being told he was too overwhelmed and ill from grief to leave bed.

His hair isn't done. His face is pale. He grabs lxc, wailing, begging him not to leave.

And lxc has no idea what to do. He tries taking nhs back to his room. Nhs is inconsolable, though. It takes two healers to settle him down.

Looking back on it years later, lxc should have seen the whole thing as a major red flag. He should have started piecing everything together then.

#nmj lives au

[withtheghostofblue]

you.

i have twenty five minutes until i have to leave for work. im not sure what I'm meant to do, or say. I'm so proud of you for everything you've done. was shooting really not that scary? you always spoke about how you were worried it would hurt your ears. i know I stopped checking in on your for a little. things have been going well. i even stopped texting your number. i thought I would call once inna while but I've not bothered. i figure at this point little updates are good enough. i do still miss you. and I look in on you a lot. but I've focused on myself a little more. i think a lot of my problems were because K didn't show me enough love. made me second guess everything anyone did. he turned me against you, by the way. i didn't want to snap back. I'm sorry ab what I did to you. my boys are still good, and I'm working on my business again! ive been clean for 58 days. shit was really bad back in august but ive only had one hiccup since then. I'm doing a craft fair saturday- I'm so nervous. its my second craft fair and my first one with my own booth. i think I wanna visit home. is wild women's still there? i know greenlaws is gone- I cried when I found out. maybe the new shop isn't as bad as it seems!! ive not been back there since I moved. ive seen k and ash. he's gonna propose soon!! we helped him look at rings over the phone last month. gram is still loud and drunk all the time. stacy isn't as bad, shes cancer free now! uh. i dont know what else I missed. all I really have to say is I'm so proud of you for being clean for so long. you're doing amazing. i hope you have fun taking T back with you guys. try and go to pumpkin fest please, I'm gonna miss it. i don think I can make it back that soon. maybe next year, who knows. sometimes I see people who look like you and it hurts a little bit. i dont think that will go away. but I dont cry when I see you've posted, I'm glad you're back to posting happy things. I'm so proud of who you've become, and I'm sorry I couldn't be there for that. I'm happy you were able to figure out why you were falling back into old patterns and fix it before it destroyed you this time. you deserve to be happy.

k is back in NH, just a warning. i don't know if youll run into him, but please be safe if you do. there's so much I wish I spoke up about when it came to him. but anyway, this is gonna end on a good note. not something ab k, fuck that dude.

i hope dad realizes why hes not in the babies life, I'm so glad you are. n I hope C liked your bub, yall have made it almost a year n a half if I'm not mistaken. i wish you nothing but healing and love, even if I cant be a part of your journey. thank you for updating me, my love. I'm so fucking proud of you. you're gonna make it to 300 days soon, Thursday. have a good day. or night. whenever you see this. enjoy spooky month, ill check back in again inna bit <3

[grewlikefancyflowers]

Comparisons between the Nie Clan's sabre cultivation and 'demonic cultivation' ?

There's something interesting in the exchange NHS and WWX have in chapter 26.

'Wei Wuxian arched an eyebrow. “This is similar to unorthodox cultivation [4].”

'Nie Huaisang hurriedly replied, “It’s different! Unorthodox cultivation is deemed as unorthodox because it seeks to take lives."

[4] 邪魔歪道 (xié mó wāi dào) – This idiom describes using unorthodox methods, though the terms 邪 (evil) and 魔 (demonic) suggest the methods being evil or demonic.'

(quote incl. footnote from tmwx)

When WWX remarks that sabre cultivation is similar to unorthodox cultivation, he specifically says 邪魔歪道, not 鬼道/ghost cultivation/guidao, which as tmwx explained here is what WWX's cultivation actually is and how WWX himself refers to it (he even outright rejects the 邪魔歪道 terminology in ch.70). Meaning that while WWX was suggesting sabre cultivation was unorthodox, he was not directly comparing it to his own cultivation method.

While WWX refers to his cultivation as the ghost path/guidao/鬼道, almost everyone else (JC, JL, JZX, background characters, etc) refer to it as 邪魔歪道/demonic cultivation. Looking at the exchange between WWX and NHS, it seems as though WWX is speaking of unorthodox cultivation generally, NHS's reply seems to be speaking of WWX's cultivation method specifically.

'“They’re not the same!” Nie Huaisang said hastily. “Demonic cultivation is demonic cultivation because it demands human lives. But our sabres don’t want people—they want vengeful, malicious spirits, monsters, demons, and so on.' (fyy)

Of course, when NHS says demonic cultivation 'demands human lives', it is in the context of comparison to sabres, which he explains use only non-humans, whereas WWX's cultivation makes use of the resentful corpses of humans.

But, it you read his defence in another way, and focus in on the fact that he considers it demonic because human lives are taken, it becomes very ironic. Because when WWX was using his cultivation to take lives during the SSC, he was praised and admired, whereas when he used it to protect the lives of the Wen remnants, he was condemned and outcast from society.

It's also a somewhat fallacious claim that WWX's 'demonic cultivation' demands/uses/takes/consumes (diff. translations) human lives, because as WWX himself explained in ch.14, he only redirects resentful energy that is already there.

So, despite NHS's protests, I'm still thinking the same thing as WWX, can sabre cultivation not be considered unorthodox cultivation? If we're talking about risks to human lives, isn't sabre cultivation more dangerous? Not only do the sabre spirits corrupt their wielders, resulting in a violent temperament and eventual death by qi deviation, it also leaves behind a violent sabre that needs to be supressed. Funnily enough, the Nie Clan's solution to the sabre problem is to use human corpses.

So in the end, sabre cultivation does use human corpses (as guidao does), it also poses a risk to the lives of its users, and risks to bystanders in the form of unstable temperaments and sabres left behind. Knowing that, how could NHS insist that it is not 'demonic', while guidao is?

So far, I've worked off the assumption that NHS does class WWX's cultivation as demonic/邪魔歪道. But maybe he doesn't—NHS's own definition of it doesn't exactly include what WWX does. If it were any other character, I wouldn't think much of this, because the hypocrisy regarding WWX's cultivation is pretty much the main theme of the novel. However, we know that NHS is 1. not an idiot, 2. doesn't seem to have any particular ill will towards WWX and 3. most importantly, NHS was present during the lecture where WWX first came up with the concept of guidao and, rather than horrified, he seemed rather interested in it. He also will have heard WWX's explanation of how it works, in that it does not use human lives but actually makes use of corpses that are already resentful.

So another way to read this scene is that NHS considers neither sabre cultivation nor WWX's guidao to be demonic.

#mdzs #mdzs meta #guidao #the third way to read this scene is that nhs doesn't really give a fuck either way #and just has a very half-arsed 'nooo sabre cultivation isn't demonic because xyz!!' spiel prepared in case anyone questions it #nie huaisang

[plan-d-to-i]

Hi!! about this

"Going into history, Lan Yi was a female clan leader in the Gusu Lan Clan, but also was a ruthless person who used the chord assassination technique to kill political dissidents. BSSR left society entirely to run her sect." Do you know if it's true? I don't remember much about Lan Yi, which chapter says it?

Thanks for being a reliable source! Much appreciated!

(link)

Hm, We hear about Lan Yi in the the Xuanwu cave:

“Lan WangJi retrieved the chord. The bowstring broke with a sharp cry through the air.

Wei WuXian, “Chord Assassination?”

Chord Assassination was one of the techniques unique to the GusuLan Sect. It was created by and passed down from the granddaughter of the sect’s founder, Lan An—the third sect leader, Lan Yi. Lan Yi was also the only female sect leader of the Lan Sect, cultivating with the guqin. Her guqin had seven strings that could be joined and dismantled within moments. The seven strings were arranged from the most slender to the thickest. One moment she’d be playing noble melodies over them with her soft, fair fingers, and one moment later they’d be able to cut through flesh and bone as though cutting through mud, transformed into lethal weapons within her hands. Lan Yi created Chord Assassination originally to assassinate dissidents, which was why she was often criticized. The GusuLan Sect was also quite ambivalent on its comments of such a sect leader. Undeniably, though, Chord Assassination was one of the most powerful, most versatile fighting techniques of the GusuLan Sect.” (Chapter 55)

And then WWX mentions her again when he’s trying to give jiang cheng the ill fated Two Prides pep talk: 

Wei WuXian, “So what if there’s the motto?! Do you have to follow it just because it’s a motto? Look at the rules of the GusuLan Sect—there are over three thousand. If people followed every single one of them, would they even be alive at this point?”

He hopped off the fence, “And, who said that being a sect leader means that you have to go along with the style of the sect? There have been so many sect leaders in the YunmengJiang Sect, I don’t believe at all that everyone was the same. Even the GusuLan Sect had an outlier like Lan Yi, but who would deny her position and her abilities? When talking about the famous cultivators of the Lan Sect, who could skip over her? Who could skip over her Chord Assassination technique?”

but idk quite where op was going w this-

Bc it's understood from that previous passage about Lan Yi that whilst the Lan Clan appreciated how her technique was powerful, they weren't particularly thrilled w the way she implemented it bc it wasn't exactly in line w their teachings... (not bc she was a woMan). Meaning being ruthless actually worked against her rep it wasn't some savvy diplomatic choice... Also It's bad to expect YanLi to be anything more than ~soup & I want to get married girl~, but it's apparently also bad she wasn't expected to be more than ~soup and I want to get married girl~? She should've been forced to learn to fight like NHS? Madam Yu isn't an asshole because she has to be an asshole to be taken seriously, she's an asshole bc she's an asshole... And she's spoken of "pretty badly" because she's known to be an asshole. And BSSR withdrew bc it sounds like she didn't vibe w shift from sect to clan /merit to blood ties and didn't want to deal w the disputes of the world

"All remotely famous cultivators began to establish their own clans, except the distinguished Baoshan Sanren, who chose to return to her native mountains and enter seclusion. "/"She told her disciples, ‘If you are going to leave the mountain, then there’s no need for you to come back. Don’t bring the disputes of the outside world into the mountain.’

LXC is a Clan Leader and nice guy because he's a nice guy lol. jiang cheng is a Clan Leader and an asshole. WRH was a cruel megalomaniac. JGY has to ruthlessly backstab his way to power. Not every single life choice the female characters make is because the evil patriarchy. There are other powerful forces at play like social status, wealth, cultivation ability and character. So that thread is just all over the place again trying to establish number 1 victim status for someone... bc apparently that's the goal always.

#mdzs #answers

[mostlikelytofangirl]

Is Nie Mingjue a heavily misunderstood character or not ? Sorry my question is a little bit vague .

Don't worry, I think I know what you mean ^^

Now, I wouldn't say that he is heavily misunderstood bc, for starters, he's not that popular a character (which personally hurts my soul bc I love him So Much), and secondly, we aren't given a lot about him in canon. At face value, at least.

That's not to say that he isn't misundertood, but I'd argue that it is more of a... simplification of his character. It's very easy to see him and fall for just the gruff, angry man whose entire personality is shouting and Saber and Killing Wens. Mxtx herself presented him as such in a way, when telling us how JGY couldn't find anything to use against him, bc well... those things previously mentioned were all there was, apparently.

But I think that, just with the man himself, there's a lot more we can get by looking at his actions than with what the story tells us directly.

He loves his brother, thats's one thing. Confirmed by the author even. And I have to state this bc I have seen ppl call him abusive bc of how he treats NHS, but we have to see things from his perspective. This is a man who knows he is going to die young, who had to step up and be a sect leader and guardian to his brother when he was still a teen. Who had to be diplomatic with the man who killed his father and all the other leaders who did nothing about it (if they even believed him). Is it really so surprising that he wouldn't waste time in anything other than becoming the strongest the can be and preparing his brother to succeed him? A little brother that, to him, is not even trying to get involved or help with what could very easily be his entire responsibility one day.

(Also the fact that you don't go on a decade long revenge plot for a brother you don't love. So yeah, Niebros loved each other, you can't change my mind).

He didn't try to get married and have his own descendants after the war bc I think it would have been obvious to him by then that he cultivated too much, he accelerated the inevitable and leaving a widow and a small child would have only been extra responsibility to NHS.

And yet he tried to get better. He let the man he didn't trust anymore treat his terminal illness bc he didn't lose hope that he could at least buy himself some more time to prepare NHS and protect the Unclean Realm bc the world post-SSC was still very much fucked up and in JGS' hands and (again) no one else seemed to care.

NMJ had one of the strongest moral codes of the entire cast, so much so that it would be easy to call it black and white, but damn if that at least made him one of the very few characters you would always know where you stood with. He was as reliable as they come.

Of course, he was far from perfect. He had his biases and even his privilege blinding him to some extent. Like his determination to wipe out all the Wen, regardless of their involvement or lack thereof in the war. Just bc he would have rather die fighting than staying in his line and survive and help as he could, doesn't mean everybody else would or even should have. As rightful and honorable as he is, he is also convinced that there is only one way to do things right and I think we can all agree that that is objectively incorrect, if at least more commendable than not doing anything at all.

In the end, I definitely think that there is more to NMJ than meets the eye. He was a paladin of justice and tried his best to uphold it according to the standards of society. He was brave to the point of it costing it his life bc he refused to give in to JGS' unilaterally decided reign, and was actively the only significant political opposition the Jin had post-war. He dedicated all he had to his sect and his brother even if his interpersonal skills didn't allow for better communication there. He was willing to give the benefit of the doubt to someone who made all the alarms go off in his head bc of what he meant to him in the past and what he meant to LXC in the present. He was there to defend anyone with a righteous claim like the Chang clan when literally no one else cared. And all this while dealing with a degenerative and debilitating mental illness he couldn't let anyone outside of his circle know of.

He was one of the strongest, most honest characters. Not without his flaws, but a better person than many others, and I fully support how avenging him is literally the backbone of the entire story and the reason we have mdzs in the first place.

#replies #mdzs #nie mingjue #I have so many emotions about this man!! #I love him so much T-T #and he deserved better too #deserved the world for caring as much as he did #bc this is a very caring man!! #his love language is just raw and action driven #he's a warrior first and foremost #who made mistakes too ofc he did #the way he handled his issues with jgy were an absolute mess #as much as jgy harbor a more than fair share of the blame here #and killing him the way he did was way out of line #my point is thart there is indeed a lot to nmj if we just take a moment to analyze him

[dayseternal-blog]

Hi days! I know you're the best person to go to for some NH fic recommendations. Can you share with us really angsty NH fics? I've read White Lillies, that amount of angst is revitalizing I LOVE IT!!! big thanks!!!

HELLO

For how fluffy NaruHina is, there SURE ARE A LOT of shippers who LOVE NARUHINA ANGST.  I’ve been asked for angst recs far more than any other type????

I will now compile every angst fic rec I’ve ever made into one long list.  (folks can see if there’s anything I’ve missed 🤓)

NARUHINA ANGST

“A Place In The Sun” by ihaveastorminme - Rated M for smut and depictions of violence, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Incomplete.  Naruto realizes that he’s not enough to love her.  He’s not enough to save her, either.

“A Fate Worse than Death” by Caelestia - Rated M for smut, ABO Canon-Divergent, One-shot.  Naruto, improperly socialized and traumatized as a child, rejects his inner Alpha, which has devastating consequences on his family and marriage.  “A Risky Bet” is its fluffier follow-up.

“Girl No 10″ by meeiwen - Rated M, Modern AU, Multi-chapter, Complete. Naruto makes a mistake with a dancer one drunk night.  Years later when he meets her again, he begins realizing his perfect life is a lie, but he’s too late to fix it. Angst if you want to know what dying feels like warning.

“if this is love (why does it hurt?)” by ClairvoyantDreamer1011 - Rated M, Friends with benefits Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. Hinata knew many things about Naruto Uzumaki. She knew that his heated glances meant ‘I want you’; that lingering touches whispered 'please’, and that the sight of his back to her screamed 'leave’. But she couldn’t tell you what they were to each other for the life of her.

“If You Said You Loved Me” by destiny’s sweet melody - Rated T, Canon-Divergent, One-shot.  Naruto begins to realize he took her feelings for granted and now he’s too late.

“The Ring that Binds” by softwind - Rated M, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Incomplete.  Naruto and Hinata are married.  So why is Naruto calling “Sakura” in his sleep?

“Why would innocent little Hinata be out dressed like that?” (One-shot) and its follow-up “On Any Given Day” (Long One-Shot) by @utsus - Rated T, Canon-Divergent. Hinata tries to move on from Naruto, right when he realizes he wants to keep her.

“For the Future” by @utsus - Rated T, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Complete. Hinata understands this better than anyone else. Naruto is easy to love.  (I actually just hate the ending a lot.  That’s what puts this on the list).

“Gilded Butterflies” by Kid Crisis - Rated M for depictions of violence, Modern AU, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. Tenshi, beautiful prostitute of the Villa, realized from a very young age that people seem to do nothing but empty her, and not even Naruto seems capable of convincing her otherwise.

“Serenity Prayer” by @katarinahime - Rated M for smut, substance abuse, PTSD, and depictions of domestic violence and non-con, Modern AU, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. When their fairytale endings smash to ugly pieces, Hinata and Naruto help put each other back together.

“Common Side Effects” (Naruto’s POV) by @katarinahime & “Medicated” (Hinata’s POV) by @szajnie - Rated E for smut, substance abuse, mental illness, and depictions of violence, self-harm, and attempted suicide, Crime/Modern AU, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. Naruto and Hinata, in a struggling relationship, must confront the pain inside before they can love each other.

“In Another Life” by theGeneralissimo - Rated T, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Complete. In which Naruto listens to his mother’s advice and marries a girl like her. And lives to regret it.

“Mistake” by Cherry1315 - Rated T, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. Naruto falls apart, and, unfortunately, Hinata has to pick up the pieces.

“Until the Day I Love” by BluBlooThalassophile - Rated M, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. Everyone is recovering from the war.

“Hidden From Sunlight” by @bunny-hoodlum - Rated T, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. How different could Naruto’s life be when the girl that seemed 'barely around’ is truly hardly around at all?

“Powerless” by @bunny-hoodlum - Rated M for depictions of violence and character death, Mystery/Crime High School/Modern AU, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. His family’s past can’t be taken at face-value, and it comes clawing back to hurt him in ways that are out of his control. DELETED FIC.

“21 Days” by @bunny-hoodlum - Rated E includes dub-con, Modern AU, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. Anonymous internet friends decide to meet up IRL and give each other their first times.

“April - Too Late/Missed Opportunities” from “Still Falling for You” by @chloelapomme - Rated T, College/Modern AU, One-shot. After her 3 years away for college, Naruto decides to confess.

“June - Honor/Sacrifice” from “Still Falling for You” by @chloelapomme - Rated T, Modern AU, Multi-chapter, Complete. Naruto marries Hinata, the girl of his dreams.  If only she loved him back.

“you totally almost killed me that one time (it’s okay I still love you)” by @itachiboutit - Rated G, High School AU, Multi-chapter, Complete.  Naruto, a promising baseball player, returns to Konoha Prep, and, without so much as even a “long time no see,” hits a ball into Hinata’s face. (This isn’t really angsty…but I get really upset in Ch. 4 and cry a lot every time.)

“Because I Love You” aka “Arranged Marriage AU Take 2″ (Same fic) by @magmawrites - Rated T, Canon-Divergent, One-shot. A canon divergent fic in which The Last never happened and Hinata Hyuga was promised to another.

“Asylum AU” from “Tales of Two Ninjas” by @magmawrites - Rated M, Modern AU, One-shot. What’s to say what’s real and what isn’t? The only thing that’s valid and true in all universes is their love for one another.

“Dreaming of AU” from “Tales of Two Ninjas” by @magmawrites - Rated M for implied suicide, Modern AU, One-shot. Naruto dreams of her. He grows to love her. Dreams are nice. Too bad reality is a nightmare. (Most likely a continuation of the Asylum AU.)

“Memory Loss AU” from “Tales of Two Ninjas” by @magmawrites - Rated M, Amnesia Canon-Divergent AU, One-shot. I LOVE YOU. Will I ever hear those words from your lips again?

“The Path We Walk” by @tenney-shoes - Rated T, Amnesia Canon-Divergent AU, Multi-chapter, Complete. With his memory of the past five years missing, Naruto never expected to be married to Hinata, and now he must navigate through the maze that is their life together with no memory of how he got there.

“Easier For Me” by @tenney-shoes - Rated T, Amnesia Canon-Divergent AU, Two-shot, Complete. How will Hinata handle waking up with no memory of how she got there?

“My Escape” by @marimare-writes - Rated T, Amnesia Canon-Divergent AU, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. Naruto wakes up from a coma with no recollection of life after graduating the Academy. Hinata, anxious and with a secret that will change both of their lives, struggles with what to do.

“Consolation Prize: Through Her Distorted Mirror” by mysterious intentions - Rated T, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Incomplete.  Her love is taken lightly, as if her heart could change so easily.

“Good Luck” By LovelyLori - Rated T, Flowers/Ballet AU, Two-Shot, Complete. A Japanese ballet company arrives in Naruto’s town.  Can love transcend language barriers? (I spent HOURS looking for this one, it totally breaks my heart.)

“On the outside looking in” by @char-lotteral - Rated E for smut, Modern AU, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. Naruto’s in love with his best friend’s girlfriend fiancee.  And he’s not moving on.

“Sincerely, Uzumaki Naruto” by @bkgsbby​ - Rated T, Modern AU, Multi-chapter, Ongoing. After his wife leaves him a week after giving birth to their son, Naruto moves back to Konoha. He adjusts to life as a single father, with the help of his friends and surprisingly, his old crush.

“Road to Redemption” by averagejane497 - Rated T, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Complete. Naruto’s made a lot of mistakes in his life, especially concerning the women he loves. Maybe this time he can get it right.

“You’re the One” by AnimeloverNUMBA100 - Rated T, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Complete. After 4 desperate years, Hinata finally asked Naruto out. He decides to give her a chance, but his feelings for Sakura has never faded. Hinata is slowly losing hope as time goes on…and she soon chooses to leave him.

Untitled by @randomprose - Rated G, Canon-Divergent, One-shot. Prompt: Hinata finds out that Naruto told Minato that Sakura is his girlfriend.

“Jitters” by ncfan - Rated T, Canon-Compliant, One-shot. He has her heart but he doesn’t even know it.

“The Red Umbrella” by ncfan - Rated G, Canon-Divergent, One-shot. As the rain hits her, Hinata thinks about what she doesn’t have, and what she’ll never have now.

“Duplicity” by GoldKing - Rated T, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. Uzumaki Sakura wants to know why Hinata’s children are blond.

“My Favorite Night” by @peppercornpresses - Rated M, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. Hinata harbors deeper feelings for Naruto after three years of being his roommate. When he starts dating Sakura, Hinata decides it’s in her heart’s best interest to turn the other way, and leaves Naruto for good with a heart-breaking secret in tow.

“The Loving Type” by @peppercornpresses - Rated M, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Ongoing. A few years have passed since the Fourth Shinobi War, in which…Rookie Nine steadily advances in rank. Naruto gets engaged. Hinata leaves Konoha. And Kakashi schemes for days.

“Blurred Lines” by @vegebulsoup - Rated E, Police / Cops and Robbers Modern AU, Multi-chapter, Complete. Detective Naruto Uzumaki is having a hard time staying focused at work due to an elusive, dark-haired beauty.  (Starts off fun and smutty, grows angsty).

“I want you to cry” and its sequel “Road of Tears” by Devahhole - Rated E for graphic murder, dub-con/non-con, and smut, High School AU, Multi-chapter, Ongoing. A sociopath blinded by revenge runs into his greatest opponent.

“Absolute” by @ssa25 - Rated M, Modern AU, Multi-chapter, Ongoing. She was his kind, shy and innocent friend. Until she wasn’t. He was her pure, beautiful and unrequited love. Until he wasn’t.

I’m very glad that you enjoyed my “White Lilies” fic!!  Here’s everything I could think of for you to cry or stress out over.

SAD READING 😢

#anon #naruhina fanfic recs #naruhina angst

[ibijau]

A second part for that fic where lxc died in seclusion and nhs, through mourning him, realised how much he felt for his Er-ge  / Also on AO3

Warning for themes of suicide, depression, and self-hatred (but this is angst with a happy, or at least hopeful ending)

Lan Xichen had been staring at the ribbon in his hands for only a short while when his uncle entered the room and gently took it from him.

That was when he realised that many hours had passed, and night had fallen. Time, once again, had moved around him without touching him. His uncle felt his distress and said nothing, instead pushing a glass of cool tea in his hand and presenting some light food to him.

Eating was difficult some days, but Lan Xichen always made an effort for his uncle who would look so sad otherwise. After everything else, it would have been unbearable to cause Lan Qiren yet more pain. Of course if Lan Xichen hadn’t lost his nerve that morning, if he’d done what he intended to do instead of hesitating… If he'd succeeded it would have hurt his uncle, his brother as well, but only in the same way that removing a splinter always hurt, and then they would have been free and relieved of their burden.

“It cannot go on like this,” Lan Qiren said when Lan Xichen found himself unable to swallow anything more.

Lan Xichen dejectedly stared at the rice he could not finish. Do not waste food. But then, wasn’t it wasted too if someone as useless as him ate it?

“Seclusion is meant to be a cultivation tool,” his uncle continued, “or a way to reflect on one’s conduct. You cannot continue using it as a way to hurt yourself.”

An argument that would have held more weight, had their family not had a long history of doing exactly that.

“Xichen, you cannot stay in this house.”

Lan Xichen’s eyes snapped up from his bowl of rice to gaze at his uncle in terror. He thought he would find judgement, or anger, or worst of all disappointment on his uncle’s face, but instead saw only a pity so great it made him feel ashamed.

“Shufu, I cannot leave,” he said.

Not ‘do not want”, not ‘will not’, but ‘cannot’.

He knew his affliction, though he had never found a suitable name for it. He usually merely called it melancholy, so it wouldn’t worry those who did not already know the truth… which was to say, anyone besides his uncle and brother. He’d never dared to fully explain this to Nie Mingjue, whose own illness was so much more serious than his little bouts of misery, but he had thought sometimes with Jin Guangyao he might… yet he hadn’t wanted to seem weak in front of a man who had fought so hard for everything he had, and changed his mind about that confidence. One secret, against all those his sworn brother had kept from him.

Lan Xichen knew what he suffered from, and how he suffered from it. It had been a constant companion all his life, even before his mother’s death, though that had certainly been the first time it had become noticeable to others. He’d become quite good at functioning through minor attacks, at disguising major ones.

This one was something different. This one, he knew, he would not recover from.

“This house is not good for you,” Lan Qiren said. “The Cloud Recesses are not good for you. Not anymore. Perhaps they never were, but we all trained you too well, and we did not see what it had done to you. You need to rejoin the world”

“I cannot,” Lan Xichen whispered, lowering his eyes.

The mere thought was intolerable. To stand again in front of others, pretending that things were fine, that he could be strong, that he could lead, that there was any wisdom to be found in him…

A warm hand came to rest on his own, while Lan Qiren tried his best to smile at him, even when they both knew it did not come to him easily.

“I am not asking you to resume your position as sect leader,” Lan Qiren said, and his weak smile dropped. “It would kill you even quicker than staying here alone could. This should never have been your responsibility to bear in the first place, but with the Wens preparing for war…”

Guilt and shame flooded over Lan Xichen. He knew this already. They had discussed it, right after Qingheng-Jun had died. Lan Qiren had been of the opinion that his nephew was too young to bear the responsibility of an entire sect, while himself had age and experience on his side. Had times not been so desperate, Lan Xichen would gladly have let his uncle rise to the honour of sect leader. But there had been a war on the horizon, and while Lan Qiren would have been more competent, neither of them could have denied that Lan Xichen was the more charismatic of the two, and they’d needed a leader who would garner good will among potential allies.

It ought to have been a temporary situation. Lan Xichen was meant the abdicate in favour of his uncle once the crisis had passed… but the Sunshot Campaign’s aftermath had created a tense political situation that allowed no apparent weakness, then there had been the need to avoiding bringing attention to Lan Wangji’s seclusion after the death of Wei Wuxian, and later that new political mess between the Nie and the Jin, and… and the time had just never been right, with always something to make them fear their sect would suffer from a change in leadership. So Lan Qiren had waited and done his best to help, while his nephew endured and tried to ignore his ever declining health, until one last crisis broke him for good.

“I don’t think it will be enough,” Lan Xichen whispered. “Even if I’m no longer a sect leader, people will still want to ask about…”

He drew in a shaky breath, drowning in guilt so thick it nearly made him sick. The things he had done he could almost live with. But what he had allowed others to do, the crimes he had left unchecked, the accusations a dying Jin Guangyao had thrown at him, the cold hatred Nie Huaisang had spewed at his brother’s second funeral… This haunted him, and he could not bear to imagine how much worse it would get for him if he faced the world.

Lan Qiren said nothing for a long while, silently holding his hands while watching his face as if searching for something in it. What he hoped to find, Lan Xichen could not imagine. He had only grown more and more empty these past two years alone in his house, until nothing but a shell remained that he hoped to make disappear as well.

“Lying is forbidden,” Lan Qiren said at last, speaking in the slow manner he used to teach younger children. “And yet in certain circumstances, it will be excused. I hope you will forgive me for the lie I am about to suggest.”

“Shufu?”

“You cannot live hidden in this house,” Lan Qiren stated, his grip on Lan Xichen’s hands tightening. “You cannot live as a sect leader, either. And I agree that it would harm you just as much to merely retire and remain among cultivators.”

“So I must die,” Lan Xichen said, terrified and hopeful at once. He only lived because others had not allowed him to take his own life. If his uncle and brother promised they would no longer attempt to rescue him…

“You cannot live on like this, and I cannot allow you to die,” Lan Qiren replied, his grasp now painful. “But I am willing to let the world believe that you have, and to never see you again, if that might help you.”

Lan Xichen blinked, surprised by the emotion on his uncle’s usually stern face, the unspilled tears that made his eyes shine. More pain that he had caused, more guilt to weigh down his soul.

“I’m not sure I understand, shufu.”

“We are going to lie,” Lan Qiren explained. “And doing so, we are going to save you.”

-

Back when he was young and had time for idle purposes, Lan Xichen had sometimes paused for portraits. Lan Wangji had needed a model patient enough, and Nie Huaisang had never taken no for an answer when he had a caprice in mind.

This, however, was quite different from pausing for a painting.

“No, no, don’t look!” Wei Wuxian scolded. “Keep your eyes closed! And don’t breathe so deeply. You’re dead, remember?”

“Nobody will look that closely,” Lan Xichen mildly complained, even though he’d been informed a little earlier that he wasn’t allowed to speak either. He’d almost laughed. If there was one person who didn’t get to demand that the dead be silent, it was Wei Wuxian. 

“The entire Lan sect is going to see what they need to think is your corpse,” Wei Wuxian said. “We need to fool them.”

“They haven’t seen me in two years, it will be fine.”

“Probably. But Nie Huaisang has sent word that he’s coming to your funeral, and we’ll need to fool him too.”

“Oh,” Lan Xichen just said, and fell silent. 

He hadn’t thought Nie Huaisang would come at all, but of course he was too clever not to pay his respects, if only to maintain whatever alliance remained between Qinghe Nie and Gusu lan.

He wondered if Nie Huaisang would be fooled by this fake corpse Wei Wuxian was crafting. Wei Wuxian was a man of rare talent, but Nie Huaisang had proven to be quite good at seeing through lies. If he realised the truth, would he denounce the subterfuge? Or would he be too satisfied to find that the last of his brother’s murderer had died to even bother looking at his corpse?

He wondered if Nie Huaisang would cry for him. They had almost been friends, once. And if Nie Mingjue hadn’t died when he had, maybe they would have…

But Nie Mingjue had died, and the manner of his death could not be forgotten.

Lan Xichen knew that Nie Huaisang would not shed a single tear for him.

He hadn’t earned the right to be mourned by him.

-

Lan Xichen did not linger to see his own funeral, but heard later that it had been a very sober affair, and that people said many good things about him.

It would have comforted him about his own value, if he hadn’t remembered that people did the same at Jin Guangshan’s funeral.

-

It had not been Lan Xichen’s own choice to have Wen Ning as a travelling companion. His family, or at least the part of it that knew he wasn’t dead, had just decided that his current health wasn’t good enough to let him wander on his own. As Wei Wuxian so pragmatically put it, they hadn’t faked his suicide just so he could go kill himself ten li away, so he needed someone to keep an eye on him.

It couldn’t be Lan Qiren, who was under so much attention as a new sect leader. It also couldn’t be Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian, who were a little too noticeable everywhere they went. They’d thought about Lan Sizhui, but in the end the young man hadn’t even been told at all that his uncle still lived, because Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian felt it would be cruel to force him to keep that secret from his friends.

Meanwhile, Wen Ning had no official duties to conduct, and he was good at staying hidden. He had agreed to keeping an eye on Lan Xichen, even though they’d hardly exchanged two words in their lives. Not only that, but Lan Xichen had been there when Wen Qing’s ashes were scattered, he had been among those who swore to destroy the Wens who survived in the Burial Mounds of Yiling. Lan Xichen had thought then that the place had turned into a den of demonic cultivators, filled with an army of fierce corpses all as dangerous as Wen Ning, who had slaughtered so many already.

It was not the travel companion Lan Xichen would have preferred, not that he’d given the question much thought.

Yet when he thought of protesting, Wen Ning had looked at him and given him that odd grimace which passed as a smile for him.

“Two dead men, I think it’s fitting,” he’d said.

That had settled the issue. Lan Xichen just did not have the strength to object any further. In fact, he quickly decided that it might be for the best that Wen Ning, of all people, would be travelling with him. After the lies Lan Xichen had allowed himself to be fed about the Wens of the Burial Mounds, it was doubtful that Wen Ning would do too much to protect him from himself, next time that melancholy seized him.

-

The first few months of travel weren't unpleasant. Lan Xichen found himself thinking that his uncle had been right, that he had only needed a little change to allow for recovery. Most of the time he appeared to be alone, as Wen Ning was reluctant to show himself to common people. Well, nearly alone: he had been given a horse by his uncle, an even-tempered animal that matched his own personality, and proved to be quite enough company for him. During the day he travelled without clear goal except for the enjoyment of the journey itself, sometimes stopping to admire a beautiful landscape, once or twice even painting something quick that he might show to…

But there was no one left to admire his work, supposing there ever was. Perhaps Jin Guangyao had only ever been polite whenever he professed that he thought the world of Lan Xichen’s latest work. As for Nie Huaisang, whose taste had always been excellent, whose praise had been so hard to obtain… certainly he must have lied, whenever he said something pleasant about Lan Xichen’s paintings. Surely it must have cost him to praise the man who had failed to prevent his brother’s murder.

Surely he must have hated Lan Xichen as much as Lan Xichen hated himself.

His thoughts started spiralling on that subject one night. He’d done a quick sketch of some mountains that afternoon, only to be struck first by the thought that Nie Huaisang would have loved to see such a place, then by the remembrance that he actually did not know Nie Huaisang at all, that the only certainty he could have was the other man hated him, having said as much when they re-buried Nie Mingjue.

Normally, Lan Xichen never stayed alone for long at night. Whether he had to sleep in the wild or could find an inn, Wen Ning would join him and check on him. But for whatever reason Wen Ning was late that night. He never really had the chance to explain, either, because when Wen Ning finally made his way to the room Lan Xichen had paid for, it was to find him preparing a knot with his ribbon.

Wen Ning did not say anything. Lan Xichen just smoothed out that knot, and politely asked about the Ghost General’s day, as he always did. It was easy to fall into their normal routine and pretend nothing had happened. Lan Xichen had always been particularly good at that sort of deception. He had his dinner, did some meditation, and went to bed as if nothing were amiss.

All that time Wen Ning stared at him as only a dead man could stare, patient and unrelenting.

Even with his back turned to him, and in the darkness of that room, Lan Xichen could still feel the strength of that stare as sleep eluded him.

“You must despise me,” he said at last, his own eyes closed as if he still thought he would sleep that night.

There was silence for a while.

“Is that an order, or a conclusion you’ve reached?” Wen Ning asked.

More silence, as Lan Xichen considered that question.

“A conclusion. I have no rights to give you orders. I have allowed so much to happen… Your family in the Burial Mounds, and…”

“A-Yuan is a happy young man,” Wen Ning interrupted. “He is well adjusted, he has friends, he’s been taught well. He told me you often took care of him when he was very young.”

Lan Xichen hesitated.

“Do not think me kinder than I am. I just couldn’t let anyone… He’d been very sick and didn’t seem to remember his life before coming to us, but if his memories returned and he said something wrong…” Lan Xichen paused, and sighed deeply. “At the time, I thought he might have been the love child of your sister and Wei Wuxian. It seemed to make sense? Wei Wuxian had abandoned everything to protect your family.”

Wen Ning was silent.

And silent.

And silent so long that Lan Xichen feared he had offended him, especially when the fierce corpse started making an odd, wheezing sound. 

Laughter, he then realised.

“Jiejie would be so insulted that anyone could think she had that relationship with Wei Wuxian,” Wen Ning said with surprising good humour, as if the idea delighted him. “I think uncle four suggested it once, and she scared him so bad he avoided her for a week. She said nobody should have such bad taste. No offence to your brother,” Wen Ning added after reflection.

"It's fine. I’ve also expressed doubts regarding his choices,” Lan Xichen said with a weak smile.

It had been such a long while since he’d smiled.

He was more grateful to Wen Ning for making him smile again than for saving his life.

-

When he’d left the Cloud Recesses, Lan Xichen hadn’t had any particular destination in mind. If he were honest, he hadn’t particularly expected his uncle’s plan to work, and had thought he’d just wander for a little while until his self-hatred became too strong and he took his own life. Since Wen Ning had now made it clear he would not allow this to happen, Lan Xichen was forced to start planning.

He tried, first of all, to ask Wen Ning if he had preferences. To this the fierce corpse replied that there was nowhere he wished to revisit that wouldn’t remind him of darker times, so while he had a list of places he’d rather avoid, he otherwise didn’t care where they went. Lan Xichen was thus left alone to decide where to go, when he still did not trust himself to make decisions of any sorts.

After a long, painful week of consideration, Lan Xichen settled for Baidi as a destination. It was a city that exiles had visited and immortalised in poetry, which he thought was fitting for his own situation, unlikely as he was to ever see his home again. On a more practical note, there was no longer a cultivation sect around Baidi, the old one having allied itself with Qishan Wen and been slaughtered during the course of the Sunshot Campaign. That meant it was less likely for anyone but rogue cultivators to be in that area, and only in case of crisis, so Lan Xichen would be in less danger to be recognised.

But there was also…

It was a very silly thing, all things considered. But Lan Xichen remembered talking about Baidi with Nie Huaisang once or twice, and how nice it would be to go there together. Back then, things had been easy. They’d been friends, and he’d thought he knew Nie Huaisang. He’d even thought sometimes that they shared a special bond, Nie Huaisang with his many fears, Lan Xichen with his deadly melancholy. Nie Huaisang had been the only person in whom he’d felt he could confide that particular weakness, the only person who seemed like he might have understood what it was like to be constantly betrayed by one’s own mind. He’d seemed very sympathetic to Lan Xichen’s plight at the time, and started writing to him out of the blue if they didn’t see for a while, just to get some news. Lan Xichen had taken to doing the same in return, and he’d thought, he’d truly thought…

But in the end, he hadn’t known Nie Huaisang as well as he’d thought, and there had probably never been any unspoken understanding of a shared plight, no secret affection that couldn’t be acted upon. Lan Xichen had been wrong about this, just as he was always wrong about everything.

He’d been wrong, and he was enough of a fool to still hold dear memories of a lie.

Wen Ning offered no objection to the prospect of going to Baidi. But when after a few days of travelling in that direction Lan Xichen wondered if he should warn his uncle of his decision, Wen Ning guiltily confessed that he’d already sent word about that, just as he’d made sure to keep Lan Qiren updated about most things they did.

“Even…” Lan Xichen started asking, before shame overcame him.

“I did not mention that you briefly relapsed,” Wen Ning replied, and Lan Xichen instantly relaxed. “It was only one time, and you haven’t tried again since. I saw no reason to worry him when you’re doing better.”

It felt odd to Lan Xichen that anyone might think his health improved. He wasn’t sure he felt any particular difference, save for the fact that he was now hiding among crowds instead of inside his house. Perhaps Wen Ning was just trying to be kind, then.

“I suppose it’s better if you’re the one writing to him,” Lan Xichen said. “After all, I’m supposed to be dead.”

“So am I,” Wen Ning reminded him. “It’d probably please him to have news directly from you.”

Lan Xichen doubted that anything he’d done since becoming sect leader had ever much pleased his uncle, even if he sometimes said otherwise. 

But no, that was just the melancholy speaking. His uncle had always scolded him when he needed to be scolded, praised him when he deserved to be praised. It would be unfair to Lan Qiren to accuse him of insincerity, and so he had to mean those occasional compliments he’d given.

That night, when he stopped at an inn, Lan Xichen wrote a brief letter to his uncle, which Wen Ning promised would reach Lan Qiren in a discreet manner.

Some days later, Lan Qiren sent a letter. Even though his prose was as stern as ever, there was something joyful in that short missive, in his remarks that Baidi seemed like a wise hiding place. Perhaps he really was happy to have received news from his nephew. And perhaps Lan Xichen being able to acknowledge that he could give joy to those he loved was a sign that he really was improving.

-

A slow correspondence started between Lan Xichen and his uncle, which became a steadier one once he had reached Baidi. At first Lan Xichen had very little to talk about, save to say how much distance they’d travelled since the previous letter. But as time passed, he found more and more to say. He would describe the villages they’d passed through, the sights they’d seen. He shared some of the sketches he’d made, and a haunting he’d had to help with, once people of a certain manor near Baidi realised he was a cultivator, after which the master of the house had invited him to stay at another home he owned in Baidi as an honoured guest.

It had felt good to be useful, to be helpful, to deal with a situation where right and wrong were easy to distinguish.

It made it easier when Lan Qiren, in his own letters, started mentioning that Nie Huaisang had announced he would be stepping down as sect leader.

At first nothing more than that was known, and Lan Xichen could only wonder at how little he knew Nie Huaisang. He’d imagined that Nie Huaisang would now show his true colour, perhaps even that he would try to seize power and become Chief Cultivator.  Why not? He was smart enough for it. Lan Xichen had long thought that Nie Huaisang’s problem arose from a lack of ambition and motivation rather than from being stupid as some would have said. Having proven he could be motivated after all, who knew if he hadn’t also hidden that he was power hungry? Even his stepping down could have been a mere part of a complicated plan.

When Lan Xichen expressed those thoughts in a letter, Lan Qiren replied that he did not think Nie Huaisang held such dark designs. On the contrary, it had been widely observed that he’d been growing depressed and indifferent in the past year, delegating more and more of his duties to his first disciple, now his future replacement, while he personally tried to amuse himself with other pursuits. If this was merely part of a scheme, then it had to be a very complex one indeed because one of the few topics on which Nie Huaisang could be bothered to take position was that a Chief Cultivator was not something anyone needed anymore.

That did sound more like the Nie Huaisang who Lan Xichen had thought he knew. It sounded like the man he’d been friends with for well over a decade, and gave him hope that not everything had been a lie, that he’d only been fooled at a few key moments rather than a majority of time. There was a comfort to be found in the thought that perhaps both Nie Huaisang and Jin Guangyao had truly liked him, that the affection and friendship had been genuine, regardless of the betrayal and the lies.

When more news filtered out, when Lan Qiren learned from Nie Huaisang himself that his intention was merely to withdraw from public life and wander to admire the beauty of the world, Lan Xichen only felt more peaceful. Being idle and aimless was exactly what Nie Huaisang had always dreamed of doing, before his brother’s untimely death had forced a different fate upon his shoulders.

In his next letter, Lan Xichen felt nostalgic enough to wonder if there was any chance that Nie Huaisang and him might meet again. He did not think that Nie Huaisang would ever forgive him his role in Nie Mingjue’s death, nor would he likely approve of Lan Xichen’s escape from his duties out of mere sadness, but for his part Lan Xichen couldn’t help but wish he could get a chance to find out what sort of a man Nie Huaisang truly was. He’d had so few friends in his life, and Nie Huaisang was the last one still alive. 

It would have been pleasant if they could have had another chance to be friends, this time without any secrets left between them, his letter concluded.

After this Lan Qiren’s letters never mentioned Nie Huaisang again, except to mention that he’d stepped down as planned. Lan Xichen felt silly for having burdened his uncle with his regrets, and dropped the subject as well.

In truth, while Nie Huaisang, Jin Guangyao, and even Nie Mingjue were often in his thoughts, Lan Xichen also had much else to keep him busy.

Without quite meaning to, Lan Xichen had gathered around him some disciples, children of Baidi who were eager to learn cultivation and had shown some promise. First it had been only the daughter and the son of the man whose house he lived in, and that hadn’t been so bad. But of course the two children had told some of their friends, while their parents had boasted of their luck to a few relatives. Soon enough Lan Xichen had been forced to explain that he could only teach children who had the right disposition, and that he wouldn’t be able to go beyond a few basic principles since it was not his intention to establish himself there. Even like that, Lan Xichen found himself with a dozen students, mostly boys but a few girls as well, listening to his every words as if he were a well of wisdom.

It was terrifying at first. A few times, Lan Xichen thought of dying to escape this new responsibility he’d never asked for, but Wen Ning’s constant presence made that impossible. He still wanted to escape then, and one night even told Wen Ning about wishing to leave Baidi behind.

“It’s just teaching,” Wen Ning pointed out. “You like teaching, no?”

The question startled Lan Xichen out of his rising panic.

“I do. I did. But that was when I still thought I had a right to it. I’m not sure I’m fit to be a teacher anymore, considering…”

“Well, you probably shouldn’t be teaching children how to spot evil people in their lives,” Wen Ning agreed with a wry smile. “But what happened doesn’t change the fact you’re a good cultivator, and you know how to show others what they need to start cultivating, according to Sizhui. You like that part, right?”

“I do. I’m just not sure I’m the right person to do this.”

Wen Ning shrugged. “Maybe yes, maybe no. Sometimes, there’s no right person. There’s just the person who’s there when it’s needed.”

Lan Xichen fell silent for a moment. He wondered if that was what Nie Mingjue had thought when his father had died, Nie Huaisang when he’d lost his brother. If nobody else was left, someone had to do the job.

“Fine, I’m staying in Baidi,” Lan Xichen agreed. “But I think you should help me teach these children.”

Wen Ning grimaced, always a frightful sight on his stiff face. “That’s a terrible idea, for so many reasons I can’t list them all.”

"You were trained in the methods of Qishan Wen, and you are probably the last person to remember that training." 

"That's one of the reasons why it'd be a terrible idea, yes." 

Lan Xichen smiled weakly. "I meant that as a reason why you should do it," he corrected. "Qishan Wen was not always what it had become. Its knowledge should not be lost." 

"I was a very poor cultivator when I was alive," Wen Ning countered. "I wouldn't be the right person to… ah. I can guess your next argument."

"Good. I don't want to do this alone. I think I don't like being on my own."

Two years with only himself for company had proven that. And the fact that he still missed Nie Huaisang and Jin Guangyao proved well enough that he craved friendship and closeness. Lan Xichen wasn't sure Wen Ning was his friend, but after nearly a year together, he wouldn't mind if the other man owned him as one. 

In the end, Wen Ning agreed to help him teach. 

The children were scared of him at first, not realising that he was equally terrified. But over time everyone relaxed, and Wen Ning appeared to find real joy in this new task. He seemed to really like children, perhaps because he'd not quite been an adult when he died, and he was clearly proud to share the knowledge he'd gotten from his sect with people who didn't instantly treat any Wen teachings with disgust. 

How odd, to find pride in anything. 

But as weeks passed, Lan Xichen realised that he too was proud of his work in Baidi, of his student's progress, of his own healing even. These days he rarely thought of dying more than once or twice a week, when it used to be a constant noise in the back of his mind. And unless he was having a truly awful day, it was getting easier to tell himself that death wouldn't really solve his problems. 

Even bad days were a little easier to handle. Lan Xichen could not control his moods nor the speed at which small things made him take a turn for the worse, but he was starting to recognise it when those shifts happened, and so did Wen Ning. The fierce corpse would cancel lessons for the day, and let Lan Xichen rest, keeping him company in silence. Or if the dark mood lasted too long, he would convince Lan Xichen to leave the house and wander on the banks of the Yangtze River, to watch passing boats and diving birds, or just to meditate somewhere different. It usually worked in getting Lan Xichen out of his own head.

-

That particular day was a bad one almost from the start. Lan Xichen’s host had proudly announced over breakfast that another cultivator had just arrived in town, and instantly Lan Xichen’s mood had turned sour. Even when his host told him that the newcomer claimed no affiliation to any sect, and didn't appear to be anyone famous, dread settled deep inside Lan Xichen’s bones. Wen Ning noticed, as he always did, and immediately said that they had some business out of town that day which they could not delay. They might be gone a day or two, he said, before shoving a large bamboo hat on Lan Xichen's head and dragging him outside. They left the city behind, walking silently for a long while until they were perfectly alone on the road.

"It might not even be a real cultivator," Wen Ning quietly remarked. "There are plenty of people out there who lie to get gifts from those who don't know better. And if it's an impostor, he'll avoid us." 

"But a real cultivator will seek our company," Lan Xichen replied. He looked around, admiring the river, and sighed. "I don't want to leave. I like this place. I like our students." 

Wen Ning nodded. "I can scare away that person," he offered. "I am the terrifying Ghost General."

That remark got a weak smile out of Lan Xichen, and almost a chuckle as well. It surprised him sometimes that they’d all ever thought Wen Ning was a terrifying thing to be destroyed. It certainly was hard to remember that he’d done terrible things in the past to justify his reputation, when he was so gentle with the children they were teaching.

“Let’s not advertise your presence here more than necessary,” Lan Xichen said. “We’re lucky enough the people here could be convinced that you’re merely the victim of a curse. If cultivators hear that the Ghost General is here, it’ll draw them to Baidi rather than away from it.”

“Then what do we do? Just wait?”

“I’m not sure there’s anything else we can do,” Lan Xichen sighed, though the idea made him uncomfortable.

Waiting to see, waiting for proof, waiting in case things got better, that was how he’d gotten in this situation in the first place. He’d done so much waiting all his life. He’d done nothing but wait and hope that others would take action first, willing to react but never to act. Waiting hadn’t worked out so well for him this far, and yet he couldn’t push himself to do anything differently even after he should have learned better.

As every time he encountered a problem these days, death offered itself as a solution. It felt like a more tempting option than it had in a long while when faced with the threat of discovery. Everyone who'd been forced to pity him over his early death would be furious. His brother and his uncle would see their reputation tarnished for having been complicit in that lie. And Lan Xichen himself would have to face the consequences of his actions, or rather of his inaction. He would be made to explain why he never doubted Jin Guangyao's true intentions, why he never saw past Nie Huaisang's comedy, why he never suspected that the world could be so cruel, or that most of its cruelty came from the people he loved the most. 

Death would be easier. 

But Lan Xichen did not want to die. 

That thought was so shocking that Lan Xichen felt guilty. After all the wrong he'd done, after causing so much trouble for his loved ones, what right did he have to live? 

Still, he did not want to die, not even when life felt so terrifying. 

After such an intense realisation, it was a relief when Wen Ning agreed that they should just wait and see what would come of that supposed cultivator's arrival. He also did not protest when Lan Xichen expressed the wish to go meditate in a quiet place he liked, by the river. It was what Lan Xichen often did when bad days struck, and he desperately needed that chance to calm his mind. 

Lan Xichen's favourite place was a particularly picturesque one. There was a large tree by the river, which in that season was covered in pale flowers, while in its branches birds sang to their mates. Petals fell on Lan Xichen's hat like colourful snow. On the other side of the water, there was a clear view of high mountains, a peaceful and steady sight which never failed to make Lan Xichen feel a little more grounded. He sat there under the tree until the shadows grew long around him, until his heart could make peace with the fantastically novel idea that he might enjoy being alive, now that he was removed from the title of sect leader which had so weighed him down. 

As darkness started to tint the horizon, Lan Xichen felt a presence near him and opened his eyes, expecting to see that Wen Ning had come back from wherever he went while Lan Xichen meditated. Instead, glancing from under his bamboo hat, he saw shoes and robes that belonged to a stranger.

“Please don’t be alarmed,” the stranger said in a voice less foreign than it should have been. “I hope you will forgive me for being so rude, but earlier as I was wandering alongside the river I saw you sitting here and was overcome with the need to paint you. It might seem odd, but something about you reminded me of a friend who passed away some months ago.”

For a brief moment, Lan Xichen felt breathless. Even if the hem of his hat hid the man’s face from him, and his own face from the man’s sight, that voice was so familiar that it made his heart ache. It had to be a coincidence, though, because while that sounded like Nie Huaisang, he would never have called Lan Xichen a friend, not after everything that had passed between them.

“As an apology for behaving this way, I actually made a second painting to give to you,” the stranger insisted, bending over to hand him a piece of paper. Lan Xichen lowered his head to keep his face hidden, but took the painting offered to him.

It was one thing to doubt a voice, but there was no doubting the skill in those brushstrokes. Every line was clear and precise, a few expert touches of colour bringing the scene to life. Lan Xichen had seen enough of Nie Huaisang’s art that he could have recognised his pieces anywhere.

“Thank you,” Lan Xichen said, which startled Nie Huaisang so badly that he took a step behind. “I am honoured that you would mistake me for a friend.”

In the silence that followed, Lan Xichen heard the doubt that had to cross Nie Huaisang’s mind, the disbelief that would be stronger than his own, having believed Lan Xichen to be dead.

“It was a very dear friend of mine,” Nie Huaisang said carefully, as if he feared to be mistaken. “Dearer than I realised when he was alive. I will always regret that I wasn’t able to tell him what he was to me before it was too late.”

“I’m sure he would have many things to tell you as well, if he could.”

Nie Huaisang took a step forward, then stepped back again.

“Please remove your hat,” he said in a tone that was both an order and a desperate plea.

Lan Xichen obeyed, lifting the hem of his hat and letting it fall behind him. Looking up, he saw emotions openly displayed on Nie Huaisang’s face. Shock first, then fear. Disbelief quickly followed, before he settled for a shining smile and happy tears and he fell to his knees, reaching out for Lan Xichen’s hands and holding them tight.

“Er-ge, I have so much to tell you,” Nie Huaisang sobbed, his smile growing wider.

Lan Xichen could only smile back, too choked up by emotion to say anything, clutching Nie Huaisang’s hands tightly.

Staying alive really wasn’t a bad thing, if he could get second chances like this.

#lan xichen #wen ning #nie huaisang #lan qiren #xisang #mo dao zu shi #mdzs #jau writes #this fic is the precise reason why I decided to challenge myself to write some fluff this december #bc I realise I'd written a lot of intensely sad lxc and maybe it'd be good to balance it out with something lighter

[featherfur]

Meng Yao should have been around when Jiang Cheng was running around with his head cut off trying to make disciples out of rogues and convince everyone to get started on the war. I just think he’d see this, probably manic, idiot who needs help and is 100% willing to be bossed around and who really doesn’t care about Meng Yao station in life because he’s just fucking desperate and wants to die but can’t because Yanli and just go “actually I’m interested”. Because Jiang Cheng would riot if he knew Meng Yao wanted to go back to his dad, and well Jiang Cheng is very pathetic when he thinks he’s being left behind (“You’re leaving me for the Jin just like Shijie? Tears and loud words for you! Tears and loud words dor a thousand years!”)

And Meng Yao would have a spot in Lotus Pier where he is VERY clearly wanted, he probably doesn’t become sworn brothers with anyone (or LXC and NMJ realize that no one needs to give the Jin any more influence and become sworn brothers with Jiang Cheng) unless it’s Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian (unfortunately WWX will still probably be killed or hunted at the very least but atleast Qin Su is alive? Maybe having MY around will help calm JC into the fact that LWJ wants to bang his brother and help him so JC can convince WWX to let LWJ atleast play for him, then maybe WWX can accidentally let slip about him already destroying one half and LWJ can help destroy the other half… Dunno if the Wen Remnants survive either sorry, honestly I don’t know if anyone can stop JGS in the long run)

So there’s two ways this goes: (under read more I have Thoughts)

Meng Yao DOES go to the Jin Sect still because JC gets wanting your Dad’s Approval even when he’s a dick AND he protects Yanli who immediately adopted him when JC showed up to the war with him. Without being stuck between a Rock and a Hard place (sorry NMJ not everyone is a annoyingly stubborn with their morals as you and MY is being hurt :( leave him alone :(( ) MY is able to continue being pressured without breaking and even though JGS keeps trying to get him to manipulate JC, MY won’t and won’t manipulate NMJ either and every time he goes to Lotus Pier to ‘look into’ the Jiang Sect he actually just spends the week being plied with children and listening to Jiang Cheng explain the fashion industry Again and talk about silks vs cashmeres vs wool so he just gets a vacay and is more prepared to stand up against his dad.

Also JC and Yanli catch on pretty quick to Madam Jin abusing MY because they were there after Madam Yu would hurt WWX and they know the signs of trying to hide the pain and Yanli suddenly starts Show Up whenever Madam Jin tries anything because that is her Didi now and she will protect him and if anyone ELSE tries to mess with him she will rip them apart like when Jin Zixun tries to bother WWX.

JGS does eventually manage to frame something on WWX but MY intervenes immediately by telling JC the truth and without the ‘did my kinda insane PTSD ridden brother so this?” Panic thoughts JC gets his people and is waiting for the force of Jin and smaller sects, with his two sworn brothers on either side. Because yeah NMJ absolutely hates the Wen but can he really ignore LXC and JC? Plus NHS on the side? He’s only there to protect WWX, anyone else can get fucked and even then he’s only protecting WWX because JC asked him too because NMJ thinks WWX sucks for choosing the wens because he’s very much of the one track ‘the wens suck’ mind. MY pretends he has no idea what’s going on but he does summon Jin Zixuan on ‘accident’ who shows up, annoyed he had to leave his kid, and is like “are we really going to accuse Nie Mingjue, known Wen hater, of protecting Wei Wuxian and lying about his innocence? Because his sword is the same size as my body and I’d rather Not”

(okay he’s more polite and subtle but that’s the gist) somehow Jin Guangshan dies, I’m voting Yanli poisoned him because I think Meng Yao is 100% willing at this point to simply take the abuse because Jiang Cheng and Lan Xichen aren’t essentially telling him to murder his father and that he’s stupid for not holding harder to his morals (sorry NMJ,,, you just,, I love you but MY is hurting and he’s not as stabby as you) NMJ is still very much crankily telling him his dad sucks whenever they meet but Jiang Cheng gets all sparkly whenever MY is around because MY will say he’s Doing Good, so there’s only so much room before JC start just biting anyone who even looks at MY wrong. (NMJ says he’s proud of JC once and JC just starts crying and NMJ UnderstandsTM why MY won’t leave him alone)

But Yanli has to be the one to kill him because MY wouldn’t because he’s a filial son and probably hasn’t lost his hope he will be Loved, Jin Zixuan wouldn’t because he’s like the only one in the entire show not down with murder, Madam Jin is not about to give up the power and money that comes from being the wife of Jin Guangshan even if JZX would take care of her because Yanli clearly is willing to rip everyone apart who fucks with her family and unlike Jiang Cheng is willing to change the status quo, and if JGS dies on a hunt they’ll blame WWX so Yanli just poisons him slowly and he dies from ‘illness’. JZX takes power, Meng Yao is told he’s amazing twelve times a day because JZX can do busy work and argue against anyone but he cannot have a small talk conversation to save his life. Life continues peacefully, Jiang Cheng keeps kidnapping JZX’s advisor because he misses him. Meng Yao knows how to control literally every single great sect but he’s busy chasing down his nephews and helping Jiang Cheng avoid marriage offers to do anything.

Once Jin Guangshan died, LXC and MY both swooped in to have the Wen Remnants moved somewhere else to ‘civilize’ them (using LXC’s own words here) and WWX is very much caught between Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji arguing over who he’s going home with and he’s honestly never felt more Loved TM. WWX spends six months to break the rest of the tiger rally under the grumpy/watchful eye of NMJ who still isn’t happy anyone from the Wen’s is still alive but he’s weak to puppy eyes and also when he’s being strong armed by his sworn brothers, MY, and NHS (though he still keeps an eye on the actual cultivators, he’s pretty much forgotten the rest of the Wen Remnants exist he just cares about the ones who know how to use a sword). Wangxian happens, idk how I’m voting for a wild Jingyi another orphan decides that he wants to meet the Purple Angry Man and body slams into WWX’s legs trying to get to the Purple man and LWJ catches him and it’s a full on romantic moment of staring into each other’s eyes while Jiang Cheng makes disgusted noises and Meng Yao pats his hand and just tells him to accept it.

Or Meng Yao stays in Lotus Pier because Jiang Cheng has problems and Meng Yao loves a messy loudmouth aggressive bitch with a secret heart of gold. Also Jiang Cheng is the exact kind of Demi-aroace dummy to not realize Meng Yao has a crush on LXC and keeps sending him over to Cloud Recesses to help with trade or something and MY gets to hang out with his crush constantly.

MY is Jiang Cheng’s personal advisor since WWX is currently refusing to process his trauma and staying in a very traumatic place. MY does try to help but WWX doesn’t trust him and probably only half trusts him around JC, BUT MY is very good with kids and helps work with JC on how to slip WWX supplies while negotiating directly with Nie and Lan without Jin glaring over him this time, and Jin Zixuan is more than happy to help when he can because again he’s just like the only one with modern morals and wants Lotus Pier to be strong since if all the sects fall then well the fucking demons/ghosts they hunt will eat them. So WWX is slowly atleast not ready to kill him, Meng Yao finds out WWX already destroyed half the Tiger Tally and tries to get him to let NMJ and LXC help him destroy it further (because that ties the three sects closer and so WWX won’t just stab someone if someone isn’t happy about the Wen’s existing)

Yanli poisons Jin Guangshan again because I think that’s the best way for him to go, Meng Yao does grieve but also that lasts for three minutes before Jiang Cheng shows up with some children he found in Yunmeng and Meng Yao needs to explain to him again that just because the kid latches on doesn’t mean you can take them home. But with JGS out of the way it’s a lot easier to strong arm NMJ into letting the Lan take the remnants (JC and NMJ still aren’t happy about it but NMJ can’t fight the three other sects and JC is getting his brother back and he’ll take the Wen living if that means WWX is too) and WWX returns to Lotus Pier. The truth of the golden core comes out probably via WWX having a flashback or panic attack or something (or that one theory of Yanli knowing,,,) words happen, WWX storms off to find LWJ.

Meng Yao wonders why he likes messy cry babies but still helps out Jiang Cheng because they’re technically brother in laws and also because he really does care about him. Wangxian happens and now Jiang Cheng is really pissed but WWX also said he wasn’t going to just up and leave so they’re on a rotating system but honestly everyone’s just waiting for them to move permanently to Lotus Pier because Lan Wangji has this giant hole in his heart for kids who love Wei Wuxian and Lotus Pier is filled with kids who are Jiang and therefore are insane ans love WWX.

Personally I think this one is the least likely but it sounds very nice right?

#the untamed #mdzs #Jiang Cheng #Meng Yao #Jin Guangyao #fix it #sorta #Lan Xichen #Nie Mingjue #Jiang Yanl #Wei Wuxian #read more #don’t take any of this seriously lmao pls I’m just fucking around

[bored-storyteller]

uh I love your storys about Uta ^^. You write him so good and in character . Could you maybe write a story about him were him and the reader ( human) meeting at an auction like reader was captured and meets Uta there . But maybe they escape the auction house and meet Uta sometime after this again. I`m sorry I love Uta angst and fluff .

Dear anon. I'll tell you, your request inspired me a lot (that's why I did it right away), but I must confess that I'm not really satisfied with the result and I'm sorry (I rewrote it three times). I have to thank my poor summary skills for this defeat, I don't think I managed to really give you what you asked me. Feel free to send me clarifications or a further request for me to remedy!

43- Tokyo Ghoul, Uta x human!reader

“The bird of ill omen and the broken toy”

You are in front of his eyes, huddled in a corner of the cold and dark container. On your knees, tied up, you are the condemned to death ready to face the gallows, or rather you are a delicious dish wrapped in its most beautiful dress to entice the spectators.

"Oh, look here ... what a delightful creature."

You are not the main article, you are not the rare object, yet your smell has brought him there. Uta is not a glutton, but he couldn't resist the temptation to peek at whoever was carrying such an inviting fragrance.

"This is really a shame ..." his voice is sweet, calm, yet ironic and cruel. Yes, it's a shame that he has to give you to some miserly ghoul.

Uta doesn’t usually prefer a certain type of food, he is not delicate or picky, nor does he have problems eating even his similar ones. But he has to admit that while those bright eyes of yours, shining with tears and desperation, look at him, he really would like to be able to eat them. Yes, it is rare for someone to stimulate his appetite in this way, customers really have to thank him for his self-control.

You are so small in his shadow, and even if you tremble, even if you smell of fear, he sees no hope in your eyes.

You know you have no escape. As little as you may be when it comes to ghouls, you know you can't save yourself. You heard them talk.

You would rather die now than continue that torture.

He feels it, and oh, how tempted he is to grant your wish.

He leans over you, he wants to see you well, he wants to hear you. The demonic beak of his mask brushes against you, rubs against your temple like the muzzle of a mother cuddling his cub, or the muzzle of a lion that is playing with his prey.

Maybe, if he had met you in another situation ... maybe ...

No. He doesn't necessarily have to devour you. Nothing is ever said with Uta, even he knows it, he knows himself. Who knows what would have happened if you had met somewhere else. Who knows who you were, elsewhere.

In conclusion, you were both unlucky: you cannot survive, and he cannot be the one to eat you. You have something in common.

"Uta!"

Roma's voice makes its way, muffled by the metal container in which you are locked up - like a ready meal -

"I'm coming!" It's time for him to go on stage, for you it's time for the final bow.

He doesn't tell you anything anymore, he doesn't need to. He will say goodbye to you that same evening, but he feels a little happy that you are among the last items to be exhibited.

He still gives you a look, you, little shaking puppet, sweet broken toy. Who can fix you anymore?

After that, he leaves you behind, abandoned in the cold darkness of your last hours in solitude, as he plunges into the cold light of demons, ready to entertain his fellow men with his affable ways. What a crazy world you are both in.

. . .

Locked in your cold prison, if you could you would cover your ears in a desperate attempt to get away from the announcements and screams, but it's impossible for you. So you wait, trembling in your shell of panic, not knowing what to do. If only you had at least a vain hope, a false chance. If only you could save yourself, for some reason, any reason then yeah, oh, how dear life would be to you thereafter. But you can't even think now.

And you don't even realize that the noises change. The cries of the victims become the cries of the executioners, and the applause becomes breathless footsteps in search of a safe place. But you don't know it, or at least not until they get closer, more distressed. They are probably running away. But who can save you? Who knows you are there? Who can remember you?

And in fact, no one stops, no one frees you, and the footsteps and the screams brush against you and pass you, without bothering to kill or save you. At least you think so.

But as soon as the silence comes, the creaking of the doors opening makes you lift your face, towards the light.

He is there again, and you wonder if that Bird of ill Omen is not your hallucination. With that bizarre suit, that hateful mask, and those ancient letters around his neck that seem ready to strangle him.

He doesn't talk to you. He is simply looking at you, you feel him looking at you, behind that deadly beak. In the silence that surrounds you, whether it is a real silence or created by mutual presence, he suddenly occupies your every thought in those few seconds of eternity. Maybe it's the touch of death that wanders your mind, but suddenly unusual questions arise in you. Who knows who he is, what he does. What does he like and what not ... does he live in the alleys of the city, or maybe, instead, without that mask he pretends to be someone?

He came to take you and devour you. But it almost seems like a strange barrier is keeping him away from you.

And while you are suspended in this limbo of cold resignation, as he came he disappears, and with his disappearance he takes away from you that sad calm that had enveloped you.

The panic returns as someone approaches.

Don't scream. Don't scream. Don't scream.

"Hey, are you okay?"

Clean eyes, a clean face, no mask is looking at you agitated. You don't know how to answer, you don't even know if what you are seeing is true.

“I'm a human, I'm a CCG investigator. Don't worry, it's okay, we'll get you out of here. "

Without your being fully aware of it, you find yourself in warm, safe arms that take you away from hell behind you. You didn't even realize you were crying.

. . .

He recognized your smell right away.

Even if it's been some time since his meeting with you, it's hard to forget something that has affected him so much, especially if it is something that has particularly touched his sensitivity over that of others.

And it's not that Uta is then easily surprised, he is ready to expect anything from that crazy world, yet you manage to upset him without even knowing that he is there.

You are smiling. And that's not the fact, but at the same time it is. You are smiling sweetly, sincerely. Your eyes are clear and bright, and you are listening to someone talking to you about their petty problems without batting an eye.

That night, that night he met you, he came back to eat you. He was not a ghoul who got lost in gluttony, but given the situation he had a particular interest in the statement "carpe diem".

He hadn't, in the end. In the end he just looked at you. It would have been easy to swallow you, but he had left you there. He had told himself that he hadn't made it in time, but who knows what was really going through his head at that moment.

It doesn't matter anymore, however. What's a broken toy like you doing so quietly exposed? How can you smile at people like that, when surely the world around you has crumbled into millions of little bits?

You make him angry, you know? Humans like you, whom the world keeps getting back on their feet despite everything, provoke anger in him.

And you are there, a few steps away from him, and you do not realize that the one who had the task of trampling your life is watching you.

And no matter how much anger he may feel inside of him, he can't help but look at you, as you speak comfortable words to someone, while you give your attention as if you have no problem.

"Uta?" Renji's voice, intent on looking at him from behind the coffee shop counter, makes him look away from you.

"Nh? Ah… ”His gaze falls on his now coffee-stained lap. The stain is almost invisible on the black sweater, but it is damp and warm.

"Don't laugh ... can you give me a towel please?"

"I'm not laughing." Yet Uta could swear that in the serious voice of his trusted friend a note of amusement is audible even to those who do not know him.

Carefully he puts the cup back on the saucer, making sure not to do any further damage.

This then. When was he ever so distracted for a human?

But when he instinctively looks for you, after all that nice little theater, you're not there anymore. The table you occupied is empty.

Only one object remained abandoned on the shiny surface. A book lies alone, the bookmark sticking out in the middle.

It is placed on the side where you sat. Did you leave in such a hurry that you left it there?

It is not that he has a real reason to do it, yet, while he is about to leave :Re, with all the tranquility that characterizes him, he picks up that literary volume in his hands, hiding it inside his jacket. Even that printed paper is imbued with your smell by now.

. . .

You talk to books, apparently. The edges of the pages are filled with thoughts written in pencil. They are all yours, it almost seems like you use the books as your diary, but there is nothing so personal about you. They are just… points of view. The world told by you, depending on the inspiration that the phrases in the book give you.

"It must be difficult to live in a world where you can talk to your food about your favorite book."

When Uta's eyes had settled on that particular phrase, he had closed. For someone else it might have been a stupid phrase, probably, but for him it was like a punch in the stomach.

He doesn't know if you wrote it before or after the accident, but in any case that simple sentence arouses a mixture of emotions that he doesn't really know where to place. Even if you wanted to, you couldn't understand what it meant to be a ghoul in that world, but on the other hand, the utopia in which Renji seems so hoping could be made up of people like you. If only he believed it, Uta could like that world, as long as there was a place in that world for someone like him.

“Excuse me, did you happen to find a book yesterday? I'm afraid I left it here by mistake. " Your cordial voice betrays a note of alarmism as you speak to the young girl. Your hands grip the counter as if it were a rock of salvation, but your feet are ready to run elsewhere, to look somewhere else in case it isn't there.

"Oh ... no, I'm sorry, I haven't seen any books." Touka's voice is sorry, an apologetic tone hovers between her words.

"Oh, damn ... sorry, thanks anyway!" Your words are so hasty, so quick that he doesn't have time to interrupt them.

The bell rings and the door closes with a click.

"You have it, don't you?" Renji never misses anything - or almost -.

"Yeah, it’s better that I give it back to them before they run all over Tokyo on foot."

"How long have you been so thoughtful?"

Uta allows himself to take a last look at the silver-haired ghoul from over his sunglasses, as he prepares to leave the cafe: "I'm always thoughtful."

. . .

The snow has just started to fall. It is light and silent, the parks of the metropolis have not yet begun to turn white.

You would gladly stay and watch the show from the heat of your home, if it weren't for that damn book you forgot somewhere. Oh, you love your books, but they're so good at hiding. You were convinced you left it in the coffee shop!

"Excuse me…"

A cordial voice caresses your eardrums. It's so warm and peaceful, yet a chill shiver stops the blood in your veins.

Turning around, you meet a man dressed in black. He is strange, but it doesn't surprise you, there are a lot of strange people in such a big city, even people who wear sunglasses on a snowy day.

You had already seen him in the cafe, but you didn't dwell on him. Not because he doesn't get your attention, just… it was an instinct.

“I think you were looking for this. I found it yesterday by chance. "

Clear and tapered fingers hand you your much-desired book. On fair skin, intertwining dark patterns form inexplicable designs, at least for you, but you're sure they have a lot to say, don't they?

Slowly you reach out your hand, and hesitantly touch the cover, to resume what you were looking for.

The night of the accident did not disappear. You are scared. You are afraid of death, but even more of pain, of imprisonment. You are afraid of fear itself. However, you are also afraid of not living, of wasting, of losing.

You are in a limbo that does not let you escape, and you can not help but continue your life, savoring every second, waiting for the Bird of ill Omen to come and get you.

So you push back the mistrust again, and a grateful and kind smile goes to the one who helped you, without asking for explanations.

"Thank you very much." Your voice reaches his pierced ears with such unexpected sweetness.

"It was a pleasure." His smile, decorated with the piercing, is barely hinted at, but delicate - reassuring? -

And for endless moments you look at each other, in silence, without speaking and without thinking. And then, as if nothing had happened, the dances between prey and predator begin.

"Can I buy you a coffee?"

. . .

Your eyes look at him shiny, frightened. You are still in a cage, imprisoned by a body that will soon be ready to consume you.

Uta wonders if you really never anticipated this. All the times you've crossed paths, have you really ever been in doubt? Every time you looked at him, every time you smiled at him or laughed at his words, did you never guess the truth? No, maybe you've always known it from the start, broken toys never work too well.

The mask of that evening, like a macabre mockery - both for him and for you - is leaning on the work table, not far from you, looking at you placidly. It’s a coincidence that he pulled it out just in the morning.

Suddenly the images of that day come back between you two, like a dream. The incomprehensible to you tattoo on his neck has a creepy look overwhelmed by the shadows that the soft lights create on the ghoul.

Fear invades you, like a script. Yet, while the Bird of ill Omen looms over you, trapping you in the corner of the room with his arms, your terror is different from what he had already seen in you. Today it is almost more visible, less controlled, as you tremble beneath him.

Maybe it's the surprise of being caught in a trap by someone who – perhaps- you had slowly begun to love – despite everything-, or maybe, simply, inside you a little hope still survives.

Uta's head bends, and the tip of his nose brushes your neck, smelling the coveted perfume that had so attracted him.

If you're so scared, how did you smile all that time? How did you keep going? How did you keep loving that world?

Beside his mask, as a warning of future torment, your dear book lies silent, ready to say goodbye. You lent it to him last time, he asked you for it.

Your smell is as strong, sweet, delicious as ever - so why is his stomach closing up? -

His jaws open, and as delicate as cruel they enclose your fragile neck. In them, the accelerated beats of your heart, still alive, make him tremble.

One bite and you will be nothing but dead flesh, and he hesitates.

He had to kill you before it was too late, right? Uta should know himself well enough, he had to understand right away what was happening inside him.

A sigh, and then his lips pull away, his saliva stops wetting you. He is not hungry, he has already eaten.

He is still upon you, but now he is only looking at you, with his eyes of blood and darkness. You, like a frightened puppy, remain shaking in a corner for a few moments, lost in his pupils. And then, like a crazy lightning bolt, you run away, as you have always run away. You slip under his arms, and as fast as you can you reach the door of the shop.

Uta watches you go, swallows bitter air, and then bows his head, surrendered.

What will happen now? Will you shut up in fear? Will you tell anyone? Only time will tell.

He slowly gets up, his hands caressing each other's tattooed arms, in a distracted gesture of protection, as he approaches the table. His fingers touch it, and then squeeze it, while he looks at the book that is left alone again, without your eyes on it.

And then, suddenly, as if he had woken up from a dream, he notices something: your smell has not vanished.

Turning his view, he sees you. You are still there, or maybe you are back there.

Now it is you who are on the side of the light, and he is in the corner of the cage. The Bird of ill Omen has become the broken toy, left alone among his masks.

"What's up?" No matter the crack inside, Uta always looks so mature, peaceful, even after he has threatened to kill you.

You take a step towards him, but your outstretched arm continues to secure yourself to the door jamb. If you left he wouldn't follow you, you know that right?

"I ... I think I'm crazy, Uta ..." You too realize how much your behavior is against logic, how foolish it is to remain - to search - in your nightmare. But on the other hand, humans ... no, people, when they are desperate, lose the light of reason, and do wrong things. Things the world says are wrong. That world, which claims to be the only one, when it is nothing more than a facade, a corner of something much larger.

"Yes, I think so too." He really thinks so. You have to be crazy to still be there, at least as crazy as he is. "Why are you still here?"

You shrug your shoulders, hugging yourself more out of shyness than out of fear - yeah, you're no longer afraid, it's as if you've run out of batteries.

"I ... as long as I'm alive I can choose, right?" It came out of your lips so naturally that you didn't even realize it was you who uttered that sentence, yet it's a truth so deep, so intense that it has guided you from that damn night to this day.

"And what are you choosing?"

Your eyes cast a fleeting glance outside, at the glimmer of the city, and without hesitation you gently accompany the door to close, imprisoning you. Imprisoning both of you.

Maybe it's a prison, but this time it's really your choice. You are with that Bird of ill Omen, but you are not tied up, you are not thrown to the ground in a cold corner. You are with him, surrounded by works of art that stare at you impassively, but it was you who decided it.

"I choose not to ignore anymore ..." Your fingers intertwine with each other, you play with them as if you need to keep them busy as you approach him. He is waiting for you. "I want to understand."

"How can you understand?" He would like to tell you, but he doesn't say a word, because not even he can understand you. What kind of mask would suit you? Who knows, yet he has learned enough about you that he should be able to think of at least one. But no, you are always there, hoping for something, believing that after all, living is worthwhile.

So he stays there, even when you lean against him. Not a contact, but a fusion. Stomach against stomach, lungs against lungs, heart against heart. Your hands cling to his arms only to hold him closer, and as he looks at your closed eyes he knows you're listening to him. You're trying to feel his every breath, every twitch of him. You want to get inside him, and he lets you do it - isn't that what he wanted too?

The predator and the prey united in a single entity for an eternal instant.

It's all so against the moral and social rules, but what do you care now? You already know he could kill you. And in that world that goes round and round without stopping, a black writing in an ancient language that also goes around a greedy neck could be your starting point for putting the pieces back together. Maybe it's a disease, maybe it's madness, but deep down, why not? Why not go a little further? Better to die than to be afraid to live, right?

"How much confidence ..."

His voice further softened by his whisper makes your previously closed eyelids lift. His nocturnal eyes look at you slightly narrowed, a slight upward crease caresses his lips without even knowing it. It is difficult for Uta to do something without being aware of it.

He is very beautiful. Beautiful and awful.

"Can't I?"

The world out there, the crazy little world is gone.

"Well, why not ... you are my food, after all."

#tokyo ghoul #uta tokyo ghoul #uta x human reader #uta x reader #tokyo ghoul uta #tokyo ghoul oneshot #tokyo ghoul fanfiction #tokyo ghoul x reader #reqest

[iameriwa]

Keeping a low profile

Greetings to you all,

Excuse my absence, I've been resting.

Overcoming the unpredictable nature of life during this pandemic.

Acknowledging that as a relatively healthy young Black women, some health challenges are inevitable.

The past 18 months, I have been experiencing heavier than usual periods (and bleeding in between my cycle), pelvic pain, an excessive need to urinate, bloating and exhaustion.

These symptoms were causing serious concern, so I booked my cervical screening, something I had been putting off due to past traumatic experiences.

Although my test results didn't show any serious abnormalities, I was referred for a colposcopy and a radiologist for a transvaginal ultrasound scan to see if there were any signs of fibroids or other issues that may impact my reproductive health.

The whole process was mentally and physically overwhelming. However, I needed to understand what was causing my symptoms, and more importantly, I wanted to rule out cervical cancer.

To my great relief, I was diagnosed with fibroids, apparently, the size of this "potentially benign" growth was so large that my gynecologist recommended surgery.

Instantly, my relief morphed into fear. In all my 35 years I'd never been admitted into hospital. Therefore, the thought of going under general anesthesia for a procedure, scared the sh** out of me.

I became anxious, so much so, that I was happy that my operation got postponed - to avoid putting myself (and others) at risk of catching Covid-19. As well as, ensuring that hospital resources, beds, and equipment were available to treat patients who are critically ill with the virus.

It was a four month wait, and during this time my symptoms didn't subside. In fact, they got worse, leaving me feeling helpless.

I leaned on my amazing Mother, Sisters and Partner for support and encouragement. I drew even closer to God. Putting my life and healing in His capable hands.

Don't get me wrong, I was nervous but I had faith.

Fast forward to this present day, I'm recovering from the surgery, and learned that I didn't have a fibroid but an endometrial polyp, that was successfully removed.

I'm extremely grateful to all the NHS practitioners who examined and treated me throughout this process.

I'm super relieved the polyp was extracted from my uterus; as polyps can be cancerous or can eventually turn into cancer (precancerous polyps) if untreated or surgically removed.

To say it has been a whirlwind of a journey would be an understatement. Still I survived, so I will use my platform to raise awareness on female reproductive health issues, particularly conditions that dispositionally affect Black women.

PS - I was nervous about sharing such intimate details about my health. However, I want to normalise women's reproductive health challenges.

Together, we need to eliminate the stigma many women face. 1 in 3 women have reproductive health issues and because of the Taboo they often suffer in silence, this needs to stop!

No one should be judged or alienated for conditions they have zero control over.

Hopefully, my post will reach women and girls who feel alone dealing with #pcos #fibroids #endometriosis #cervicalcancer and other reproductive health concerns. ❤️

Remain blessed and take care of yourselves

Author - @iameriwa

#self care #health is life #mental heath awareness #reproductive health #fibroids #pcos #endometriosis #cervical cancer #gynaecologist #yonipower #blackgirlmagic #black women health #black women matter #melanin #blackart #black beauty #black queen #melanin power #story time #sharing is caring #live life to the fullest #god is faithful #be inspired #be informed #be empowered #women's health #nhs #apperciation #gratitude #dark skin

[lhaewiel]

So.

Previously on my "The Untamed/MDZS Ice Skating AU".

Unfortunately for y'all I have not finished talking about it. as always, a big thank you to @galaxy-darkmoon for giving me rope, and also @the-nonchalance-blogs for giving me the idea in the first place.

We left things at the double divorce JFM/YZY and JGS/Madam Jin.

At this point in time the other players step in. I will start with the WangXian and continue on with the SangCheng part.

I will do the XiYao drama in the next post cos this is already way too long and I need to think.

Anyway, enjoy. Under the cut

THE WANGXIAN DRAMA

Now, WWX is still competing and training under freshly divorced JFM as a solo - and possibly the star of the Jiang rink. A lot of people and journalists have a lot of things to say about the Choices™(C) made by JFM, but WWX's skills and prowess and several silver and gold medals on his rack, plus several trophies won jot all of that down.

Enter the Lans. The Lans are an extremely traditionalist family of ice skaters, who only skate with classical/traditional music and that has become through the years their trademark.

LQR, the coach and also LXC and LWJ's uncle, after the untimely disappearance of the parents, and the two brothers have trained a lot - LXC is already in the seniors category, whilst LWJ is still in the juniors category.

It's time for regional championship and WWX is also competing.

And it's clichè, but it is love at first ina bauer and toe loop for both WWX and LWJ. They both score first and whilst JFM and LQR are already down to throw hands for the gold medal, WWX blurts out a "why don't we share? we are both really good, so why don't we share the podium." This all whilst being the usual feral gremlin. LWJ is like, "no, it's not in the rules", but LXC is like "uncle, that's a really good suggestion" and LQR is at an inch from losing it, JFM deals the final blow like "you heard WWX, come on! let's praise them both!" and LQR concedes.

JC has seen the thing and he is at the "this might as well happen" point and just leaves the rink where he was watching WWX without a word. I will come back on this in just a moment.

LQR anyway invites WWX at the Gusu rink to train, stuff that happens once every blue moon, and JFM is like "yes, that is my son" "Uncle Jiang I am not your son" "Details, just go." "Ok, let me say goodbye to people."

And by "people" he means JC and Yanli, who were there to watch him compete.

Yanli congratulates him and says that JC is outside.

WWX goes to JC, who has had A Day™ and is just like "congrats, if it had been me at your place my father would have preferred to give up the position rather than have me share the podium" "Aw you know he doesn't mean that. I know you are as good as me and one day he will see that." "well, good luck then, I have stopped competing, say that to Father™"

More drama.

More misunderstanding.

JC goes back home, packs up and rents a flat near the Nie rink. He takes the position as ice skating teacher for kids over there and tries finding some sort of peace, whilst still aching over the above mentioned drama.

WWX goes to Gusu with the ache of having lost a brother completely and yes, being close to LWJ does make him feel better, but he still misses greatly his family.

Anyway the national championships approach and eventually WWX and LWJ change into a pair, become an item and end up skating into the sunset over wangxian.mp3, break several rules, get disqualified and then LQR and JFM, pressed by LXC, make an appeal and get the commission to accept them.

WWX and LWJ skating off into the sunset inspired by this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpp5XKiQqBE

THE SANGCHENG DRAMA

I said that JC stops competing, goes away from YZY's rink, rents a flat and goes teaching ice skating to kids at the Nie rink.

Now, the Nie have a team of hockey players. NMJ is the coach, NZH is the captain and NHS should technically be on the team as well, but he'd rather pull out paper and pencil and sketch out the things that interest him the most, birds most notably. NHS has an extensive collection of fans as well.

NMJ is fuming bc NHS has the capability and the potential to be the perfect ice hockey player, but he'd rather just NOT participate in that. NMJ has unfortunately a chronical illness and knows he can't be forever there, he would LOVE for his brother to inherit the team, but he has not said anything about his chronical illness to NHS thinking that if he did maybe NHS would feel too much pressured. He does not know that NHS knows about the chronical illness and is the one making sure that NMJ takes his medications.

In any case, when JC starts teaching, NHS is fascinated. He watches JC gracefully glide on the ice and be generally the Ice Price Of His Dreams, If Not For The Aggressiveness, but considering that also NMJ Tends To Be That Way Too, NHS assumes that there is some turmoil going on and makes it his mission to uncover All Of That™.

THat and also NHS really enjoys drawing JC gliding gracefully on the ice - too bad JC discovers this and also NMJ is VERY perceptive, but NOT subtle at all, so when NMJ says "HUAISANG COME AND PLAY!" "One sec bro, I have to finish something" "STOP LOOKING AT THE TEACHER'S ASS AND COME HERE NOW OR I WILL BURN YOUR FANS." "... Thank you bro for destroying any chance I had."

Awkwardness ensues.

JC is unfortunately very direct and does not beat around the bush. NHS confesses. JC is in a mystic crisis bc "OMG someone likes ME, the CRANKIEST and ANGRIEST man on earth." NHS takes a step back and notes, in his 35 steps plan on how to court and conquer JC that he needs to make him understand that "the greatest thing you'll ever learn is to love and be loved in return".

It takes NHS to step in to win a game, whilst NMJ is in the hospital bc the chronic illness is too much to bear, JC taking NHS to the hospital to see NMJ alive and slightly better, NMJ's blessing to NHS and JC and NHS throwing himself onto JC after NMJ is asleep bc THE PRESSURE, THE WORRY, THE CONCERN, and JC says that he will be there and NHS wanted to be the conquering one, but he ends up conquered by the heart of gold of JC.

JC reveals all about his family and NHS convinces him to reconcile, if not with his parents, with WWX and Yanli. Things work out bc HS is great at mediating and JC is genuinely touched by him.

WWX and Yanli tell JC to go for it, bc it is clear that there is some sort of sentiment, thus forcing JC to sort himself out.

JC sorts his feelings out and declares his love to NHS by performing a choreography on "Nature Boy" by David Bowie.

See you next time with the XiYao and Xuanli part.

#the untamed #the untamed ice skating au #mine #but do feel free to use any of this #as long as you credit me #wangxian #sangcheng

[tracer85s]

MDZS fics i treasure (2)

parts 1, 2, 3

The Simplest Way Forward by harriet_vane

[explicit, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 71k, complete]

one of the classics. this is also the fic that got me into the whole mdzs fandom. i literally just searched up kid fic on ao3 and this one seemed promising... so i read it without knowing who tf lan wangji or wei wuxian are... fast forward a few months later and all i can think about is “wangxian are married and have a son.” THEY’RE MARRIED AND HAVE A SON. now take that knowledge and add in modern wangxian as university music students who get married to take care of a-yuan and you’ve got yourselves this brilliant fic. also, i did not know you can endlessly pine for your own husband but with wangxian, anything’s possible

Neatly Arranged by thunderwear

[teen and up, lan wangji/wei wuxian, jiang yanli/jin zixuan, 45k, complete]

yes. i love arranged marriage wangxian fics okay ! they’re my guilty pleasure. this one’s unique because lwj’s actually bethrothed to jiang yanli and jin zixuan’s bethrothed to wwx which is actually kind of funny especially when jzx asks lwj if he wants to switch. it does get angsty but there’s a happy ending !

Night of Sixth Magnitude Stars by Leffy

[mature, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 22k, complete]

modern au with student lwj and teacher wwx although it’s only for the first chapter. THIS FIC. OH MY GOD. i literally got tricked, i thought it would be lighthearted and fluffy but the angst (specifically for wwx’s character) broke my heart. THE PLOT IS AMAZING, PLEASE READ IT

one good thing by Yuu_chi

[teen and up, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 26k, complete]

this one’s a classic, one of the first few mdzs fics i read and i absolutely love it. modern au with ghost wwx and house owner lwj *squeals* IT’S SO FLUFFY... and then gets quite a bit angsty at the end, i swear your heart stops at that scene. anyway it’s such a good read sigh,,, might re-read

Pigtail Pulling by protos_metazu_ison

[general, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 3k, complete]

whenever i’m feeling down, this fic always manages to cheer me up. it’s very lighthearted, just fluffy wangxian in cloud recesses: wwx teasing lwj and lwj teases back and absolutely flusters wwx. it’s just SO CUTE

Rush Hour by Ulan

[teen and up, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 3k, completed]

basically modern wangxian in public transport, pressed up against each other, with a dash of protective lwj and damsel in distress wwx. warning, there is minor sexual assault but the rest is just fluffy wangxian <3

seldom all they seem by Fahye

[explicit, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 24k, complete]

yes... another arranged marriage fic... i have nothing to say for myself. but this one’s just the usual fic with lwj finding wwx annoying at first and then pining so hard afterwards once he realizes wwx is his entire world. the author also changed the wwx escaping with the wens scene and OH MY GOD THEIR VERSION *chef’s kiss*. READ IT !

silhouettes to steal this night by moonsteps

[teen and up, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 51k, complete]

MODERN WANGXIAN AS ASSASSINS/HITMEN AND ROOMMATES. WHAT MORE DO I NEED TO SAY. guys, they just flirt every time they’re assigned to the same hit i am literally crying. top tier fic as expected from moonsteps (read the rest of their works you won’t regret it at all).

so you’ve been robbed by a museum by yukla

[mature, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 5k, complete]

immortal cultivators wangxian in the modern world !! to summarize, wangxian somehow does *not* get their shit together in the ancient times and pine all the way into the 21st century until lwj sees an entire section of paintings of himself hanging in the museum... you can guess whose yearning-induced artistic creations those are ;)

soft-hearted by @sarah-yyy

[general, lan wanji/wei wuxian, 6k, complete]

are you wondering what happens if child lwj found child wwx in the streets and brought him back to gusu with him? this. this is what happens: SOFTNESS, FLUFF, AND WWX CALLING GEGE. i literally didn’t know how much i need childhood friends to lovers wangxian until i read this and every time wwx called lwj gege? hello? i was pretty sure i was going to burst into flames if i kept screaming. also, read the author’s wangxian rebuttable presumption verse on their page bc it’s absolutely genius oh my god i’m never going to shut up about the rp verse

take yourself home by ribena

[mature, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 26k, complete]

okay, this one is HEAVY. like you would seriously just want to wrap wwx in a blanket and feed him soup kind of heavy. to summarize, radio host lwj keeping plant dad wwx company with his voice and then himself once he moves into the same apartment as wwx. honestly, this one hits home for me, it will definitely make you sob but the ending is so hopeful and i need a sequel of just plant dads wangxian being domestic 

tame by rikke

[mature, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 11k, complete]

IMAGINE IF LWJ DID NOT LEAVE WWX AFTER THE XUANWU CAVE. just imagine oh my god, maybe they would’ve gotten their feelings resolved faster... or hatched a baby xuanwu, and wait what? yes, you read right. this fic is about xuanwu dads wangxian in yunmeng, it’s fluffy and funny and just a perfect lighthearted read if you’re having a bad day

The Fire Lapping Up the Creek by notevenyou

[explicit, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 66k, complete]

in which wwx travels to lanling alone for jin ling’s one month celebration and gets heavily injured, cue in very heavy hurt/comfort. warning, there’s major illness and surgery in this fic. so basically, lwj stays in the burial mounds to guard wwx and the wens while wwx recovers from his injury. LISTEN, burial mounds husbands wangxian and heavy hurt/comfort, what more do you need. go read it

The Lotus Defense Society by mondengel

[teen and up, lan wangji/wei wuxian, jiang yanli/jin zixuan, 3k, complete, only available for registered users of ao3]

i have lost count of how many times i’ve read this one, i love it so much. lwj and jzx bond over their mutual pining for wwx and jyl and accidentally starts a cult with nhs to prevent unsuitable people from courting them. where do i even begin with this fic, it’s literally so amazing !! very crack-y, my favourite line is “Young Master Jin!  It’s Lan Wangji! He’s enacting Phoenix Mountain Part 2!” and then what happens after is my favourite scene

the secret ingredient by queen_gee

[teen and up, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 8k, complete]

WWX BAKING FOR LWJ WHO HAS A SWEET TOOTH OH MY GOD I AM SOBBING. modern college/university wangxian with lots of pining and baking, i am literally banging my head against a table this is the sweetest fic, but they’re also idiots in love so there’s some light angst but you’ll literally melt at the ending !!

The Trials and Tribulations of a Modern Father by Bgtea

[teen and up, lan xichen/jiang wanyin, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 24k, complete]

written in jiang fengmian’s pov where jfm realizes jiang cheng attracts a lot of attention from... old men. cue in lan xichen and his charming smile and this spells trouble to jfm so he enlists wwx’s help in operation protect jiang cheng. endgame xicheng with side pairing wangxian, this is absolutely cute and very humorous

with you, I am home by tellthemstories

[mature, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 47k, complete]

MODERN CULTIVATORS WANGXIAN DECIDE TO FAKE DATE *SCREAMS*. slow burn (but not if you read it fast enough), the way they are so domestic in this one oh my god, a LOT of oblivious wwx, and lwj meeting the family. i’m a sucker for fake dating fics and this one is just SO right. i’m urging everyone to read it for self-care

#wangxian #mo dao zu shi #mdzs fic rec #fic rec #lan wangji #wei wuxian #lan wangji/wei wuxian #jiang cheng #lan xichen #xicheng

[unforth]

Rules of the Gusu Lan Clan

Since I wrote my fic about junior Wei Wuxian trying to follow every rule, I’ve been wanting to compile a list of all known rules across multiple sources, and apparently today is the day for that.

General notes:

According to the MDZS novel, there are 3,000 rules at the time of the lectures, and 4,000 rules 13 years later after Wei Wuxian is resurrected. According to CQL, there are 3,500 rules at the time of the lectures.

These rules are presumably numbered, as when Lan Wangji is being beaten, Lan Qiren asks him “what is the 52nd doctrine of the Lan clan?” However, they are given in a different order in different sources so establishing how they are numbered is impossible. Since we can’t know the order they “belong” in, I’ve organized them by grouping them thematically. For the few I know numbers for, those numbers are included in parenthesis.

I don’t know how these rules are referred to in Chinese; in English they are translated as rules, principals, doctrines, or laws. Based on contextual clues, it’s possible that the rules are sorted into different categories (ie, principals vs. doctrines vs. rules)

I did my best to consolidate the rules listed duplicatively over multiple sources, but as I don’t speak Chinese and therefore cannot say which are identical in the original, there is likely some redundancy. This is exacerbated by a lot of rules apparently being given in both “do not” and “be” forms - ie, “do not disrespect elders” and “be filial” and “be respectful to teachers” are all rules. The reason I opted to leave these areas of redundancy is that this compiled list is around 175 rules. There are 3,000 plus of these things. If just ~175 have this much duplication the amount of redundancy in the actual list must be insane, so I think these overlapping rules are intentional and consolidating them would be inappropriate.

Crossposted to AO3

Sources I used to compile this list:

The “Book of Righteousness” notebook, as translated by BigBadRedPanda. They did two translations, posted on Tumblr and on Twitter, which don’t always match on translation choices.

The inscribed wall is shown in the donghua, as translated by my-otp-list, based on a list transcribed by an unknown Weibo user.

The MDZS wiki, which draws on multiple sources.

The Netflix translation of CQL: I watched through the episodes of the lecture and transcribed these myself. I do not have time to rewatch the whole series for those that might have been listed elsewhere. I specifically rewatched: the fight between WWX and LWJ and WWX arrives at Cloud Recesses in episode 3; the “NHS has a bird” scene in episode 3; the “putting a turtle on LQR’s back” scene in episode 4; and the scene where LWJ is punished in episode 43.

For anyone with a lot of patience and a working knowledge of Chinese and English, in CQL episode 3, timestamp 23 minutes on Netflix, there’s a carved stone with the rules on it. Also, in episode 4, timestamp 2 minutes on Netflix, Wei Wuxian is shown sleeping amidst the copies he’s made, there are more rules visible then. Same episode, timestamp 3:30 or so, a disciple opens a pamphlet of the rules and some are shown. (I expect there’s much overlap between these three sources). Information there might be able to expand this list? Or it might be entirely redundant. I don’t know. I’m sorry.

Interpreting the list:

“Source” indicates which source(s) include this rule. (this isn’t exhaustive and there is a fair amount of overlap between CQL and MDZS)

notebook - “The Book of Righteousness” translation by BigBadRedPanda

donghua - the translation of the list in the second episode done by my-otp-list

CQL - the Netflix translation of CQL

MDZS - the Exiled Rebels translations of the novel.

“Also translated as” is a different translation from the same source (ie, two different translations of the Book of Righteousness)

“Alternate” is a similar rule from an alternate source that overlapped so closely that I lumped them together (ie, overlap between Book of Righteousness and donghua)

THE RULES:

Rules pertaining to appropriate behavior and comportment:

Lan clan disciples must follow the principles of the Lan (source: CQL)

Do not work after 9 pm (source: notebook)

Do not rise after 5 am (alternate: wake up at 8 am (??)) (source: notebook, donghua)

Do not go out at night (also translated as: venturing out at night is prohibited) (source: donghua)

Those who come at night should not be allowed in until 7 AM (source: CQL)

Do not be late (source: CQL)

Do not enter Cloud Recesses without permission (source: CQL)

No one is permitted to attend the lectures without an invitation (source: CQL)

Do not enter the back hills without permission (source: CQL)

Do not fight without permission (alternate: fighting without permission is prohibited) (source: notebook, donghua)

Do not create damages (source: donghua)

Do not take life within Cloud Recesses (alternate: do not kill within the premises)  (source: notebook, donghua)

Do not stand incorrectly (also translated as: do not stoop while standing) (alternate: have a proper posture) (source: notebook, donghua)

Do not sit improperly (also translated as: do not slouch while sitting) (alternate: do not sit with a disgraceful pose, sitting improperly is prohibited) (source: notebook, donghua, CQL)

Do not make noise (alternate: do not make an uproar, causing noise is prohibited) (source: notebook, donghua, CQL)

Do not hurry rashly (also translated as: do not rush while walking, do not walk too fast) (alternate: do not act impulsively; running is prohibited) (source: notebook, donghua, CQL)

Do not move arbitrarily (source: CQL)

Do not smile for no reason (also translated as: do not smile foolishly, do not laugh for no reason) (source: notebook, donghua)

Sneering for no reason is prohibited (source: donghua)

Do not drink alcohol (alternate: alcohol is prohibited) (source: notebook, donghua, MDZS, CQL)

Do not consume meat (source: MDZS)

Killing livestock within the area is prohibited (source: MDZS)

Do not be difficult with food (alternate: do not be picky about food) (source: notebook, donghua)

Do not eat more than three bowls (alternate: eating more than three bowls is prohibited) (source: notebook, donghua)

Do not talk during meal times (source: MDZS)

Pets are not permitted (source: MDZS)

Change clothes after a shower (source: CQL)

Wear a headband to discipline yourself (source: CQL)

Do not touch others’ headbands without permission (source: CQL)

A headband is not to be used for any other purpose (source: CQL)

Only a spouse or child may touch the headband (source: MDZS)

Do not bribe a law enforcer (source: CQL)

Do not use a concealed weapon (source: CQL)

Do not hide an edged tool (source: CQL)

Do not wear any jangling objects like beads (source: CQL)

Do not wear more than three accessories around your waist (source: CQL)

Do not alter clothes secretly (source: CQL)

Never hurt insects or plants (source: CQL)

Do not borrow money (source: CQL)

Rules related to personal virtues (virtues in the English sense, not the classical Chinese sense):

Love and respect yourself (source: donghua)

Behave yourself (source: CQL)

Be respectful (alternate: be courteous) (source: donghua, CQL)

Be modest  (source: CQL)

Arrogance is prohibited (source: donghua)

Hide your wisdom (source: CQL)

Do not show off your skills (source: CQL)

Be humble (source: donghua, CQL)

Do not be supercilious (source: CQL)

Be amicable and united (alternate: be cordial) (source: donghua, CQL)

Be strict with yourself (source: donghua)

Have a strong will and anything can be achieved (source: donghua)

Diligence is the root (source: donghua)

Morality is the priority (source: donghua)

Harmony is the value (source: donghua)

Be ethical (source: donghua)

Uphold the value of justice (source: donghua)

Be just (source: donghua)

Shoulder the weight of morality (source: donghua)

Perform acts of chivalry (source: donghua)

Have courage and knowledge (source: donghua)

Have courtesy and integrity (source: donghua)

Do not be ill-mannered (source: CQL)

Have affection and gratefulness (source: donghua)

Be compassionate (source: CQL)

Be generous (source: donghua)

Frugality is a moral (source: CQL)

Give more, take less (source: CQL)

Do not expect rewards after giving (source: CQL)

Do not be miserly (source: notebook)

Do not regret after offering (source: CQL)

Accumulate virtue and merits (6th rule) (source: CQL)

Make sure to act virtuously (source: donghua)

Be grateful (source: donghua)

Be grateful when praised (source: CQL)

Stop bad habits (source: donghua)

Destroy the five poisons (the five poisons are desire, anger, ignorance, pride, and jealousy; references: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Five_Poisons; http://www.chinabuddhismencyclopedia.com/en/index.php/Five_poisons) 

Do not indulge in pleasure (source: CQL)

Do not be promiscuous (alternate: do not commit acts of promiscuity; promiscuity is prohibited) (source: notebook, donghua)

Do not indulge in debauchery (source: notebook)

Do not wallow in luxury and pleasure (alternate: do not live extravagantly, do not be luxurious) (source: notebook, donghua, CQL)

Be peaceful when insulted (source: CQL)

Do not succumb to rage (also translated as: do not get angry) (alternate: do not be over-the-top; do not be aggressive) (source: notebook, donghua, CQL)

Speak meagerly, for too many words only bring harm (source: donghua)

Do not be haughty and complacent (source: notebook)

Do not be of two minds (alternate: be of one mind) (source: notebook, donghua)

Do not exult in excess (also translated as: do not be overly happy) (source: notebook, donghua)

Do not grieve in excess (also translated as: do not be overly sad) (source: notebook, donghua)

Do not covet the property of others (source: CQL)

Do not steal (source: notebook)

Do not be greedy (source: notebook)

Be careful with your words (source: donghua)

Do not use coarse language (source: CQL)

Do not tell lies (source: notebook)

Do not take your own words lightly (source: donghua)

Do not sow discord (source: CQL)

Do not use flowery writing (also translated as: do not write about love and sex; do not use frivolous language) (alternate: do not spread empty line (sic) ) (source: notebook, donghua)

Do not say one thing and mean another (alternate: do not break promises; do not go back on your word) (source: notebook, donghua, CQL)

Do not boast about your own strengths (source: CQL)

Believe sincerely (source: donghua)

Do not be suspicious (source: CQL)

Do not be wasteful (source: donghua)

Do not break faith and abandon right (source: notebook, donghua)

Do not be unreasonable (source: CQL)

Rules for training, studying and learning:

Learning comes first (source: donghua)

Train your body and your mind (source: donghua)

Maintain your own discipline (source: donghua)

Organize work properly (source: donghua)

Do not neglect your studies (source: CQL)

Do not give up on learning (source: donghua)

Do not lose your life goal (source: CQL)

Nurture aspirations (source: donghua)

Rules for interacting with others:

Love all beings (source: donghua)

Embrace the entirety of the world (source: donghua)

Honor good people (source: donghua)

Appreciate the good people (source: donghua)

Good people will be esteemed, blessed by natured, and accompanied by good fortune (source: CQL)

Respect the filial ones (source: donghua)

Be fair, and they will follow you (source: donghua)

Be trustworthy, and they will believe you (source: donghua)

Be mighty, and they will die for you (source: donghua)

Be loyal (source: donghua)

Earn trust (source: donghua)

Win friendships with kindness (source: donghua)

See friends as neighbors (source: donghua)

Steer away from bad men (source: donghua)

Correct others by correcting yourself (source: CQL)

Do not fear the strong (source: notebook)

Do not ignore others and be undisciplined  (source: CQL)

Help the lonely (source: CQL)

Take pity on the desolate (source: CQL)

Do not despise poverty (source: CQL)

Do not bully the weak (alternate: do not bully others; bullying is prohibited) (source: notebook, CQL)

Do not mix public and private interests (source: notebook)

Help the underprivileged (source: donghua)

Care for the weak (source: CQL)

Lend a hand to those in need (source: CQL)

Rescue those in danger (source: CQL)

Do not take advantage of your position or connections to oppress others (source: notebook)

Do not build wealth by using others, for this wealth won’t last (source: donghua)

Do not curry favour (also translated as: do not flatter) (source: notebook)

Do not go tuft-hunting (source: CQL)

Do not be a social climber (source: CQL)

Do not form a clique and exclude others (alternate: do not form cliques) (source: notebook, donghua)

Do not insult people (alternate: do not slander others) (source: notebook, CQL)

Do not use bad words to hurt others (source: donghua)

Do not tease others (source: CQL)

Do not praise yourself and slander others (source: notebook)

Do not jump to an unfounded conclusion (also translated as: do not make assumptions about others) (alternate: do not judge others quickly) (source: notebook, CQL)

Do not judge people behind their back (alternate: do not speak ill of others; talking behind other people’s back is prohibited) (source: notebook, donghua)

Speak not about other people’s weaknesses (source: CQL)

Be easy on others (source: donghua)

Be sad for other people’s sufferings (source: CQL)

Rejoice in other people’s blessings (source: CQL)

Regard other people’s gains and losses as your own (source: CQL)

Do not hold grudges (source: donghua)

Have wins and losses (source: donghua)

If others win over you, do not envy (source: donghua)

If others lose to you, do not look down (source: donghua)

Do not take apprentices excessively, nor pass ordinary people (source: CQL)

Interacting with Wei Wuxian is forbidden. (added by Lan Qiren at some point post lectures...yes, really...heck of a lot of good it did anyone...)

Rules for respecting those in authority:

Respect the elderly (source: CQL)

Do not disrespect the elder (source: notebook)

Do not disregard the younger (source: notebook)

Do not forget the grace of the forefathers (source: donghua)

Be loyal, filial, friendly and dutiful (source: donghua, CQL; donghua only lists the first two)

Be a filial child (source: donghua)

Do not argue with your family, for it doesn’t matter who wins (source: donghua)

Honor the teachers and respect the elders (source: CQL)

If your senior is standing, you may not sit until they have done so (source: CQL)

Teachers have extensive knowledge and are examples of moral integrity (source: CQL)

Disturbing female cultivators is prohibited (7th rule) (source: MDZS)

Rules on cultivation, good and evil:

Concentrate on cultivating (source: CQL)

To suppress and eliminate ghosts and monsters, liberate them (source: CQL)

Stay on the righteous path (source: CQL)

Take the straight path (alternate: follow the righteous way) (source: donghua, CQL)

Reject the crooked road (alternate: do not take the crooked ways) (source: donghua, CQL)

Eliminate evil and establish a just law (source: CQL)

Do not associate with evil (source: CQL)

Do not befriend the evil (52nd doctrine) (source: CQL)

Do not fall to evil (source: CQL)

Resist evil (source: CQL)

Promote good (source: CQL)

#mdzs #meta #lan clan #lan clan rules #this took a shockingly long time #hope it's useful to anyone #untamed