#i miss lindsay i miss jack i miss matt (but i mean i miss their chemistry pre-ryan)

[myattball]

if i wasnt suffering through the throes of testosterone taking away my ability to do so, id probably be bawling over AH right about now

#rhgrghrhhhgaghahgghhgghaghgh #i am not going to watch dogbark sorry #i find 'dudes in blank tshirts' sketch comedy to be cringe and awful and terrible and i cant stand it #michaels hot tho. love to see it #i miss lindsay i miss jack i miss matt (but i mean i miss their chemistry pre-ryan) #i miss what ah was #at least i made it onto ahwu before they went #achievement hunter

[darks-ink]

Matt the Cat

Based on the “Matt is a cat” AU by @somegrumpynerd and @keeningthoughts / @keen-arts. A lot of scenes and plot points are taken from their various posts, as well as some (bits of) conversation. I've really enjoyed seeing their posts cross my dash and while watching Uno: Infinite this weekend got inspired to take a shot at writing a short one-shot for the AU. Anyway I kinda missed the mark on the "short" part but it was fun, so. Enjoy!

Sometimes you just have to revisit the fandom that first got you to write fanfics, back in *checks watch* 2016. Anyway I also haven't written AH fics since then so apologies if I didn't quite get everyone right.

Fandom: Achievement Hunter (RPF) Rating: Gen Words: 8,699 Additional Tags: Fake AH Crew, Alternate universe, Humor, Friendship, Mistaken identity, Canon-typical shenanigans

Summary: Hearing the stories of new crew members Jeremy and Trevor, the Fakes quickly decided that this "Matt" must be their cat. It was the only logical assumption! They were mistaken.

Also on AO3!

---

The door clicked shut behind Trevor, and he looked at the people already in the room. The Fake AH Crew were a fearsome presence, even if he had already been accepted into their midst. Him, Jeremy, standing by his side, and Matt, safe at home.

“Finally,” the big man himself, Geoff Ramsey, sighed, waving the two of them further into the room. “Come on, grab a seat. We’ve been waiting forever.”

“Well, you could’ve sent the address a little earlier than five minutes beforehand,” Jeremy snarked back, then immediately went pale as they realized what they’d done.

But Jack Pattillo, the crew’s second, just grinned back. “I like these guys. We’re keeping them, right?”

“We hired them already, I sure fucking hope so.” Geoff shot her a tired look, beckoning them inwards. “Come on dickheads, go sit down.”

“You already gave them the address to our apartment anyway,” Michael Jones pointed out, leaning back in his chair. “Bit late to tell them to fuck off now.”

“Unless we killed them,” Jack said, fake-casually.

“Please don’t.” Trevor pulled back a chair so he could sit down, and saw Jeremy doing the same from the corner of his eye. “I like being alive, personally.”

Jack hummed thoughtfully. “And it’s just the two of you, right?”

“Us, and Matt back home,” Jeremy answered dutifully, shifting in their seat to look more casual than they likely felt. “We’re all sharing the same apartment.”

“Right,” she said, a slight crease between her brows. Trevor couldn’t place its meaning. He knew it wasn’t something about the three of them living together—the crew had a similar living situation—but he didn’t know what else. Maybe that Matt, as the hacker, was staying home instead of coming over to meet the rest of the crew? Maybe they should’ve brought him here, and then back home to his set-up?

“Anyway, Geoff, go ahead and tell us the plan before you burst.”

He heaved a gusty sigh. “Yes, Jack, thank you. If we can all please focus on the job instead of the new hires?” Geoff looked around the room, then nodded resolutely. “Good. Here’s what we’re doing—"

---

Lindsay shifted slightly, leaning against their car, fingers rattling against the side of their phone. On its screen a baking video played, which they were half paying attention to. Well. Maybe a little more than half. That was fine! They could multi-task.

It had been a few weeks since their new crew members, Trevor and Jeremy, had joined. They were glad for it—the two of them had been a lot of fun to have around, and had come out of their shells quickly. Trevor looked so serious and dry but had quickly shown himself to have quick wit and a delightful weirdness to him, and Lindsay wouldn’t say no to having another non-binary crewmember around, especially one as fun as Jeremy.

Not to mention the sheer chaos those two had introduced by mentioning someone called “Matt”, who apparently lived with them, and then never saying anything else about him. Well. They thought Matt was a him. Quite frankly, they didn’t know anything about this ‘Matt’, outside of the fact that he—they?—lived with Trevor and Jeremy.

The sound of a car door thrown shut made them look up, automatically pausing the video on their phone. Speak of the devil.

Trevor threw the other door of the car shut, turning to Jeremy. “Did you give Matt water before we left?”

“Yeah,” Jeremy confirmed, shouldering their bag. “He was sleeping on the desk again when I went in.”

“He’s gonna hurt himself one of these days doing that,” Trevor grumbled, shaking his head. “He has a perfectly fine bed!”

“But why sleep in a bed if you can sleep on a desk?” Jeremy grinned, and Trevor just clicked his tongue in response as the two of them came up to Lindsay. “Hey Lindsay. Sorry to keep you waiting.”

They stuffed their phone into their pocket, the newly gained information running through their mind. “It’s fine, that’s the downside of not having you guys in the apartment yet.”

It all made sense now! Obviously Matt wasn’t a person who Trevor and Jeremy were keeping in the dark—or had informed without telling the crew. Matt was a pet. And, by the sound of it, he might’ve been a cat, even! What other pet would sleep on desks?

“True, true.” Trevor nodded at the car they were still leaning against. “Are we driving further on from here?”

“Nah, it’s just around the corner.” They pushed themself away from the car, and mentally shoved the newly gained revelation away as well. Excitement about cats would have to wait until after the job. But! They would definitely bring it up with the rest. If they invited Trevor and Jeremy into the apartment with them, obviously the two would bring their cat, and then the crew would finally have their long-awaited pet!

And Gavin would be thrilled if they gained a crew cat!

---

“You can’t just keeping saying he’s a cat without proof, Lindsay!”

“Why not? It’s the truth!” They waved their hands around, gesturing wildly. “Besides, what proof? They said it, isn’t that enough?”

“Did they say Matt is a cat, though?” Gavin pointed out, frowning. He didn’t think Lindsay would lie about this on purpose, but, well. Sometimes things happened.

A lot of times things happened. This crew really wasn’t good at clear communication.

They rolled their eyes. “As good as. But if you don’t believe me, ask yourself.” They pointed. “See, there’s Jeremy.”

He followed their finger and, indeed, there was Jeremy. Gavin waved at them, “Oi, Jeremy! Come over for a sec, will you?”

“Uh, yeah, I got a moment.” They came over, looking between him and Lindsay. “What’s up, Gav?”

“You have a cat, right?” Lindsay asked, grinning at Jeremy. “Can we see a picture?”

Jeremy blinked, visibly confused. “Yeah…? I mean, sure.” They pulled their phone out of their pocket, swiftly unlocking it and swiping through the gallery.

“Let’s see… Oh, this is a good one.” They turned the phone around, showing the two of them the screen. On it was a photo of a longhaired tabby, lazing on a cat bed. “One of the few times I’ve been him actually using that cat bed.”

“Oh, what a cutie!” Lindsay complimented, adoration heavy in their voice. And Gavin had to agree. It was a very cute cat. He… He really kind of missed having a cat. Unfortunately neither he nor Lindsay had been able to convince Geoff to get a shared crew cat for the apartment. Or any kind of pet, really. Geoff kept countering that having the lot of them was basically the same as having pets.

“He’s great,” he chimed in. “Thanks Jeremy. If you guys ever move in, will you bring him?”

“That’s the plan.” Jeremy pocketed their phone again, looking between the two of them. “Uh. Was that all?”

He offered an awkward grin. “Yeah, sorry. We were just curious.”

“Ah, that’s fine. I wasn’t in a rush anyway.” Jeremy inclined their head. “But I’ll get going then. Have a good day, Gav, Lindsay.”

“You too! Thanks for showing us your cat!” Lindsay waved them goodbye, and they watched as Jeremy left. “See, I told you.”

Michael snorted, still lounging on a chair behind them. “Yeah Gav, they told you. That’s what you get for doubting Lindsay.”

“Like you believed them,” Gavin countered, rolling his eyes. “Come on. It’s not my bloody fault this crew is rife with miscommunication.”

“Well, not this time.” Lindsay pulled a haughty expression, looking down on him. “Next time, you’ll believe me right from the start.”

“Yeah, yeah, alright,” he agreed easily. “Next time, no matter how ridiculous, I won’t doubt you.”

---

“Ugh,” Geoff grumbled, pulling the next sheet of paper towards him. He had hired an entire team of people to deal with the boring bureaucratic part of running a criminal gang, and still he got tons of paperwork to deal with.

Stupid. Why had he ever agreed to this stupid idea. He should’ve just made Jack boss. She never had to deal with this bullshit anymore. He would’ve made a great right-hand man to her!

He looked at the paper. Ah. Crew payroll. At least this was easy. Just check over it to make sure everything made sense, then sign off on it. Easy peasy.

Oh, yeah. This was the first payroll since they hired Trevor and Jeremy, wasn’t it? He’d have to take a good look at it, then, to make sure everything was right. He trusted the B-team to do everything right, but this would be just the right moment to sneak something in.

Yep, both of their new crew members had been added. Good, good. And. Uh.

“Huh,” he muttered, frowning at the sheet of paper. A third new name had joined the list. Right between Jeremy and Trevor was Matt. As in. Their cat, Matt? He’d even been given the same kind of payout as Jeremy and Trevor, as a new full-time crew member.

“That… makes no sense.” He heaved a sigh, then pushed himself up from his desk. He’d probably been working too long. Time to get a reality check from his beloved second.

Barely remembering to grab the crew’s payroll before leaving his office, he wandered over to the living room. There he found Jack and Michael, playing a game on the tv. Instead of looking what they were doing, he just held out the sheet of paper, blocking her view. “Jack.”

“Geoffrey,” she responded, leaning to the side to look around the paper. “I’m kind of in the middle of something.”

“So am I.” He shook the paper, the sound of it lost over the noise of the tv. “Why are we paying a cat?”

“Huh?” She looked away from the tv for a moment, then swore as Michael cackled. “Why are you asking me? B-team takes care of all that stuff.”

Michael snorted over the sound of his mashing buttons on a controller. “That cat must be doing good work, Geoff.”

“Must be,” Jack agreed absent-mindedly, leaning a little further to the side. “Geoff, seriously, move.”

He looked between the two of them, then back to the sheet of paper. “Unbelievable,” he muttered, but stepped away. Apparently he was the only one in this goddamn crew who thought it was weird they were including a cat in their payroll.

Well. Whatever. He still had plenty of boring paperwork to work through. If he spent any time on figuring out this bullshit he’d just lose even more time to it. As long as that goddamn cat wasn’t earning more than the rest of the crew it wasn’t worth the hassle.

He dropped the paper back onto his desk and signed it with a flourish.

---

“—so we’re mostly casual about the stuff here,” Lindsay explained as they showed him the kitchen in the crew’s shared apartment. “Like, don’t touch anything that anybody signed, but otherwise it’s pretty much a free game.”

“Right.” Alfredo nodded. “Even though I don’t live here?”

“Well, it’s not like you’re the only one,” they pointed out, quirking an eyebrow at him. “Trevor and Jeremy have been with us for months and they’re still living in their own apartment. Besides,” they paused to give him a look, “you’ll probably lose your own stuff to the crew as well when you put it in there.”

“Fair enough.” He looked away at the rustling of a jacket to see Trevor coming up to them.

“You’re good taking care of Fredo’s introduction alone, right, Lindsay?” he asked as he pulled on his coat.

They hummed. “Yeah, I’ve got it.” Trevor nodded and turned around.

“Oh, and Trevor,” they interrupted him, waiting a moment for him to turn back around. “Please tell Matt he’s a good boy for me?”

“Yeah, of course,” Trevor agreed easily, nodding again. “I’ll head out then. See you two tomorrow.”

“See you,” Alfredo replied automatically, as he turned that conversational twist in his mind. Tell Matt he was a good boy…? Who the hell was Matt?

Lindsay, clearly picking up on his thoughts, shot him a wide grin. “Matt is Trevor and Jeremy’s cat, and he’s the main reason why they haven’t moved into the apartment yet. There’s a little more logistics involved in moving in two people and their cat, especially if all three are used to sharing a tiny apartment.”

“Right,” he agreed. That made sense. “And you just… ask them to tell their cat he’s a good boy for you?”

“Oh yeah, absolutely.” They shrugged, unrepentant. “That, or I ask them to give him a hug for me. Man, I can’t wait for them to move in. I really want to give that cat a pat myself.”

“You haven’t met him?” he asked skeptically, quirking a brow. “How do you know he’s a good cat?”

“All cats are good cats, duh.” They winked. “And I’ve seen photos, and heard the boys talking about him. Great cat.”

Well, fair enough. He couldn’t argue with that.

---

Jeremy dropped another empty box on the floor of Matt’s office. “There, do you think that’s enough?”

“Should be,” he agreed, spinning around on his chair. “If not we’ll have to grab another box or two. Do we have enough for the rest of the house?”

“Trevor is coming back with a few more boxes, that should do the trick.” They looked over the boxes littered around the office, some half-filled with stuff that could be packed away already. “You got us a storage box to put the house stuff in, right?”

Matt gasped dramatically. “Jeremy, you doubt me? I said I would take care of it and I did.”

“Just making sure,” they assured him, rolling their eyes. “You’re almost done with that hacking thing, right? So we can focus on packing afterwards?”

“Yeah, the last thing is running now. After that it’s just the finishing touches and that should be that.”

“Good, good.” The lock of their front door rattled, and Jeremy tensed for a moment before recognizing the sound of a key in the lock. “Hey Treh.”

“Hey Jer,” Trevor called back from the door, soon followed by the click of the door and then the sound of cardboard hitting the floor. “Thanks for letting me in.”

“No problem man,” they said, grinning at him as he walked in the office. “Everything went well?”

Trevor hummed. “Yeah. They’ll clear out a room for us tomorrow, and one for Fredo as well. Oh, also…”

He leaned over, patting Matt on the head. “That’s from Gavin. He asked me to tell you you’re a “good good boy”.”

“Oh.” Matt grinned wide, a pleased expression on his face. “Thanks. I should tell everyone thanks once we’re there. They’ve been so nice to us.”

“Especially to you,” Trevor said, clicking his tongue. “Maybe I want to be told I’m a good boy for once instead of always acting like the messenger.”

“You are a good boy, Trevor.” Jeremy grinned at him, even as they were connecting the dots in their head. Oh my god. The reason why everyone in the crew was acting so weird was because they thought Matt was a cat. That is why Lindsay and Gavin had asked to see their cat all that time ago.

Oh, this was just too funny! They would have to make sure that no one saw Matt during the move. It had been almost six months since they had joined the crew and no one had figured it out yet. If they kept that up while living in the same apartment…

They hastily shoved down their chuckles. Couldn’t let Trevor and Matt in on the joke. Their reactions would be so good if they found out at the same time as the crew.

“We should make sure Buddy stays in the office,” they pointed out, during the lull in conversation. “At least that first week or so, until he’s settled in.”

“Oh, yeah, good idea,” Trevor agreed, nodding. “Wouldn’t want him to get in anyone’s way.”

“Except mine, apparently,” Matt grumped half-heartedly. “But yeah. That way he won’t accidentally escape the apartment either. And having a familiar person and place will probably help.”

“Exactly.” Alright. Step one: complete. Oh, this was so exciting!

---

Lindsay reclined further in their chair, casually swiping at their phone screen to scroll. Opposite of them Trevor was sitting more neatly, but equally casual, leafing through a book. It had only been a few days since he and Jeremy had moved in, but already they wandered around the house like they had lived there for months.

Well, not entirely surprising, considering that they’d been around for months already, but still. The only sad part was that they hadn’t seen Matt yet. Apparently the cat was staying in their room for now.

They hear a door open and looked up automatically; Michael was supposed to be done soon with his job. But as they did so, they realized that’s not what they heard. The front door had a different sound to it, a click of the lock being undone and re-locked. This was the sound of one of the room doors.

Trevor looked up from his book as well, and together they watch a bedraggled long-haired man wander out of the hallway with bedrooms. The man, seeing them looking, waved as he headed towards the kitchen.

Before they can say anything, Trevor called out to him, “Make sure to grab a snack while you’re out there, Matt!”

“Yeah,” the man—Matt?!?—called back, “I was planning to.”

“Okay, just making sure.” And with that, Trevor just turned back to his book. Zero comment.

Lindsay looked back to the kitchen once more, taking in the man standing there. Long dark hair, big loose clothing, casually grabbing a snack to go with his refilled bottle of water.

Huh. Matt must be some kind of werecat, then. Sometimes a cat, sometimes a human person. But if no one had mentioned it clearly they didn’t want to talk about it, and, well. Lindsay wasn’t rude enough to ignore that.

Buuuut they can bring it up later when Gavin gets back. He would hear her out, no problem.

---

Alfredo grunted, blinking up at his ceiling. Not that he could see it in the dark, but still. Goddamn him.

No. Goddamn Lindsay and Gavin for those stupid damn stories. For days they’ve been telling everyone in the crew—bar Jeremy and Trevor—about Matt the cat not being an actual cat but a fucking werecat. Like, really?

But apparently the thought had wormed its way into his head anyway, because he can’t stop thinking about it now. He had started thinking that they’re pulling some kind of elaborate prank on him, because those two had moved in at the same time as him yet he hadn’t seen their cat in the past few days, but no, apparently not. Because today a long-haired brown cat had run out of their room, only to be grabbed by Jeremy and escorted back in, chastised for leaving. And Alfredo knew he heard Jeremy say the name Matt when they went into their room.

Ugh. Well, if he’s up he might as well grab himself a drink from the kitchen. It was—he looked at his alarm—way past midnight, so no one else should be up. That should save him from an awkward conversation.

He rolled out of bed, yawning widely and he pulled open his door. At least there was enough ambient light in the apartment itself that he didn’t need to turn on any lights. The last thing he needed now was to wake himself up even further with that bullshit.

But, really. A werecat? Their only evidence was that Lindsay had apparently seen Matt as a long-haired man, and that Trevor had greeted him by name. Gavin, despite the vehemence with which he agreed with Lindsay, apparently didn’t even have any proof himself. He just believed them without a doubt.

Unbelievable, Alfredo thought to himself, and then realized there was already someone in the kitchen just before he stepped inside.

He yelped, throwing his hand over his mouth immediately to muffle the sound.

On the other side of the open doorway the burglar(?) jerked, startled by the sound, almost dropping whatever they were holding in their hand. A… bottle? Huh.

“Oh my god,” the man gasped out, quiet as a whisper. “Alfredo, you scared the shit out of me.”

“What—?” he hissed back, automatically matching volume. What kind of intruder would say that? Or know his name?

“Just grabbing a drink,” the man held up the bottle of water. The… The long-haired man. Oh, no. No no no. “Sorry, I need to finish up some hacking stuff for tomorrow. Talk later?”

“Uh, yeah, sure man,” he replied automatically, taking in the stranger’s appearance. Fuck him. Lindsay had been right. There was the undeniable evidence: the man with long dark hair, matching the cat he’d seen exactly.

What the fuck.

He definitely should’ve stayed in fucking bed, fuck him.

---

Jeremy leaned back in their chair, watching the tv with the rest of the crew. The game they had been playing had turned extremely competitive, with plenty of yelling and screaming, and Jeremy had bailed so they could oversee the chaos.

Specifically, so they could see the incoming chaos Matt was about to bring, since the yelling was sure to draw him out.

They had been feeding the flames all week, and still no one had properly connected the dots. They had moved in while the rest of the crew was away on a sudden mission, and Matt had mostly been busy in his new office—their shared room—ever since.

There had been a close call a day or two ago, when Buddy had escaped from their room, but luckily Jeremy had been able to grab him and bring him back before Matt could. If those two had been seen together the game would’ve surely been over.

Honestly, luck had been on their side anyway. Lindsay had apparently seen him but assumed he was a werecat, of all things, and Gavin had just? gone with their assumption. For some reason. And then, a few days later, Alfredo had also seen Matt and, instead of refuting Lindsay’s assumption, and given in and gone along with them.

It was better than Jeremy could’ve planned themself. Absolutely brilliant.

Either way, things were surely coming to an end… because there came Matt. No one else had seen him yet, too focused on playing or watching the ongoing game.

He stood behind the couch, looming over Gavin, Michael, Geoff, and Jack. And then, completely unknowing of what he was about to unleash, very casually asked, “Hey guys, who’s winning?”

They were glad that they had braced themself, because the ensuing screaming was deafening. Even Trevor yelled, probably startled by everyone else. Matt himself jerked back several steps. Hell, Geoff startled so badly he threw himself off of the couch entirely, and Gavin had crawled half on top of Michael.

This was so good. They were so glad they had hung back to watch this happen.

“Hey Matt,” they casually greeted, ignoring the cacophony and barely holding in their laughter.

“See!” Lindsay yelled, suddenly, victoriously, pointing a finger at Matt. “See! I told you guys he was a werecat!”

“A what?” Matt blinked at them, even as Michael shoved Gavin off of his lap and onto Geoff, ignoring the resulting squawking. “Huh?”

Trevor twitched, blinking in confusion. “Yeah, what the hell are you talking about?”

No longer could they hold it in. Jeremy burst out in cackling laughter, and soon enough Matt begun chuckling along, cautiously.

“Get off me, idiot,” Geoff grumbled, pushing Gavin off of himself so he could get up. “Someone help me up.”

“You’re not that old, Geoffrey,” Jack complained, but offered him a hand anyway. “Can someone please explain to me what the fuck is happening?”

“I honestly couldn’t tell you.” Matt shook his head, looking over at Trevor, and then at Jeremy themself, still laughing. “But I think I know who’s responsible for it.”

“Am not!” they immediately denied. “I just found out a week ago, before we moved in. And I haven’t even done anything! The stories fed themselves.”

Geoff found his balance standing up, then stared at Matt for a long moment. “Well,” he finally said, “I guess that this makes more sense than having a cat on the payroll.”

“You thought I was a cat?” Matt asked incredulously. Then, looking at the expressions of everyone around the room, he repeated, louder, “You all thought I was a cat?”

“Well! We all saw the bloody cat, didn’t we!” Gavin gestured wildly, still lying on the floor where Geoff had dumped him. “It just made sense!”

Matt blinked down at him. “The cat? You mean Buddy? You all thought I was Buddy?”

Lindsay gasped. “His name is Buddy? That’s adorable!”

“How did no one here realize?” Trevor blinked at everyone, wide-eyed. “For six months, none of you realized that Matt was a human, or that he was our hacker. Who did you guys think was doing all that work?”

“Uh.” Everyone looked over at Geoff, who shrugged. “I guess I didn’t really think about it. B-team probably hired someone, or something.”

Behind him on the couch, Jack groaned, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Geoff. Really?”

“What? I was right, wasn’t I?” He gestured over at Matt. “Someone got hired to take care of it. All good!”

“I still can’t believe everyone in this crew thought I was a cat.” Matt shook his head. “I mean—Gavin, we’ve been texting for weeks.”

Gavin, in the middle of getting up from the floor, squawked defensively. “Well! I thought it was just Jeremy having a laugh, pretending to text as the cat! We just texted “meow” back and forth!”

“Wait, wait, wait.” Michael waved Gavin down. “So then why haven’t we seen the cat around?”

“Because he’s been in our room?” Matt shrugged, casually. “We didn’t want him to—Wait a second. Jeremy, you were the one to suggest keeping him in the room so no one would realize!”

“But you all agreed with my reasoning!” they countered, grinning widely. “It made sense!”

“Well, I think we should get to see the cat now. As compensation.” Lindsay opened their arms, as if expecting them to just place Buddy in their arms. “Come on.”

“Yeah, one sec.” Matt shook his head even as he turned around to go back to their room. Moments later he returned, Buddy lounging in his arms. “See? Not the same thing.”

Trevor leaned closer from his chair, exaggeratedly looking Matt over. “I don’t know Matt. You do look a lot alike.”

“Oh, fuck you, Trevor.”

---

Matt’s fingers stilled over the keyboard as he activated his new program’s test run. There, now he could just sit back and wait for a moment.

He still couldn’t believe that he worked as the Fakes’ hacker for six months without them knowing he was a human person. Six months! And the only people who had known he wasn’t cat were Jeremy, Trevor, and the B-team, apparently. Fucking unbelievable.

Well. Maybe a little believable, he supposed.

A knock on his door broke him out of his thoughts, and he spun around on his chair. “Come in, it’s open.”

“Heya Matt,” Lindsay greeted him as they came in, hands held strangely behind themself. “You got a minute?”

“Sure?” he answered cautiously, glancing back at his computer for a moment. “What’s up?”

“Here, I got you a little something!” They shoved the thing into his hands the moment he lifted them. Something soft and furry, and—

It was a cat plushy. A very cute, very fluffy plush cat.

He looked at the plush in his hands—so soft!—and then back at Lindsay, who cracked up into giggles.

“Thank you?” he said when they settled down some.

“It’s because we all thought you were a cat all this time.” They gestured at the plushy. “So it’s a little something to make up for it, since I’m the one who started it, I think.”

“Oh, well, it’s fine.” He tucked the plush closer to himself. It really was very nice to hold. “I mean. It’s kinda silly, but it’s hardly the worst thing that could’ve happened.”

“Yeah, well.” They shrugged. “It is pretty funny in hindsight. But I saw that plushy and I thought, hey, why not. Matt would probably like it.”

He smiled back at them. “I do, thank you.” He reached over, settling the plush on his desk next to his monitors. “And Lindsay? Thank you for the compliments and the hugs.”

They laughed, opening their arms. “Yeah, no problem man. You want a direct hug?”

“Well,” he said, drawing out the word as he got up out of his chair. “I’m not saying no to that.”

---

Jeremy leaned against a wall, quickly checking the clip in their pistol. They hoped they wouldn’t need to use it, but better to be prepared than to be caught off-guard.

“Oh, shit,” Matt muttered over the coms. “Uh. I said that wrong. My bad. You should’ve taken the right turn instead of the left.”

“Matt, you motherfucker,” Geoff snarled in the comm, clearly struggling to keep his voice down so they wouldn’t attract the attention of the police. “What the fuck do you mean you sent us the wrong way!”

“I was looking at the wrong thing, sorry!” He sounded genuinely apologetic, but it was clearly too late from the way Geoff was seething. “It’s fine. Just a little further. Follow the alley and then take a right at the end.”

They quickly continued walking, but Gavin was already reaching up to unmute his own mic. “Matt, how did you send us down the wrong way, Matt! It’s just left and right!”

“I was looking at the wrong thing! I said sorry, didn’t I!”

And, well. That was definitely the wrong thing to say. Jeremy threw a quick look over at Geoff, and found him visibly boiling over. They lowered their hand back to their pistol, but hopefully they were far enough away from the police that Geoff’s shouting wouldn’t alert them.

Jeremy tuned out of the screaming earful from Geoff—fed by Gavin and Jack—but kept half an ear on the comm. Just enough that he could hear Matt’s heavy sigh, followed by the quiet mutter of, “I miss being a cat.”

Despite themself they cracked up, laughter cutting off the shouting from the rest of the crew. Oops. Apparently they hadn’t muted their own mic. Everyone fell silent, watching them lose it over a comment none of them heard.

“What did we say that was so bloody funny?” Gavin asked, frowning at them.

“Sorry,” they apologized as they caught their breath again, shaking their head to get their focus back. “Just something Matt said. I’m good. Let’s go.”

They should’ve realized that that would just encourage Matt.

---

BK winced as Geoff’s voice echoed around her, bouncing off of the alley walls just off from his actual voice in her comm. She wished she could turn the comm off, but it wouldn’t do to miss critical instructions. Her admittance into the crew was too new to risk over something like this.

Besides, he wasn’t even yelling at her. And, despite the volume he was reaching, he didn’t even sound that mad. It was more theatrical than anything.

Probably.

She leant around the corner, spotting Trevor opposite of her, hidden behind a stack of boxes. Seeing her in turn, he gave her a thumb’s up and a reassuring smile, and she gladly returned the favor. See? All good.

A weary sigh rattled over the comm, and she winced again, this time in sympathy. It seemed that Matt, for all that he stayed back home as the hacker, caught a lot of Geoff’s ire. Maybe being away from the action made it worse, instead of better.

“Man,” the man in question huffed. “You were so much nicer when I was a cat.”

When—Huh? When he what?

Sudden gunshots interrupted her thoughts. Fuck. Alright, that thought was getting shelved until after the mission. Focus now.

The moment they returned back to the base, however, the topic immediately sprung back into her mind. As she put away her weapons and body armor, the thought kept circling around in her head. What did it mean?

Stepping back out into penthouse proper—the shared Crew home, for all she didn’t yet live there—she set out to get answers. But who could she ask?

Oh! There was Ky! She had been around a little longer than BK herself, so maybe she would know. At the very least, she wasn’t one of the old guard who would surely use this as a pranking opportunity.

“Hey Ky,” BK greeted the moment she was close enough. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure?” Ky turned to face her. “Did something happen during the mission?”

“Kinda.” She made a dubious face. “I heard Matt say something weird. Like… Not normal for this crew weird.”

Ky’s face dropped into a frown, and BK immediately followed it up with, “He said something about the rest of the crew being nicer when he was a cat?”

“He—Huh?” Ky’s expression cleared up immediately—and straight into confusion. “He said that?”

“Right?” BK threw up her hands, feeling exasperation flood through her. “I mean, what does that even mean?”

“When he was a cat…” Ky repeated, under her breath, brow creased. “When he was a cat…”

“Where did you hear that?” a hushed voice interrupted them, and BK jerked away—and saw Ky do the same opposite of her.

Standing next to them was Jeremy, wide-eyed and grim-faced. “Seriously! Be quiet about that, where did you hear that?”

“Matt muttered it over the comms earlier today.” BK felt her heart drop. What was going on in this crew? “Why? What did he mean?”

Jeremy looked around, shiftily, and BK found herself doing the same automatically. But the hallway was clear. Just the three of them.

“Look, Matt doesn’t like to talk about it, okay? Top secret. No one gets to know about it.” They met her eyes first, then Ky’s, deadly serious. “No one.”

“We wouldn’t tell!” Ky immediately exclaimed, then grimaced and lowered her voice. “Jeremy, we wouldn’t, you know that.”

They stared them down for a moment longer, then nodded, slowly. “Alright, fine. But I’m serious—Matt doesn’t want to talk about it. Keep it quiet, okay?”

“Promise,” BK said, and she heard Ky’s voice echoing with her own.

Jeremy nodded once more, then gestured for them to lean in closer. “Okay, so you two know that Trevor, Matt, and I were hired at the same time, yeah? We all lived in the same apartment at the time. And it took a while for us to be moved in because of it, so it took six months until we could move in, at the same time as Alfredo.”

“Right,” Ky said, slowly.

“And it was before we used long-distance comms, so no one but me and Trevor knew about Matt. For six months, none of them saw him, none of them heard his voice, nothing. Just the two of us, whenever we came home from our missions.”

BK couldn’t help but feel sorry for him, even more so than earlier that day. Six months with barely any human contact, and now he got yelled at by Geoff? Harsh.

“And just when we were about to move in, something big interrupted, and everyone had to focus on crew work. So the three of us, we just moved in on our own, without anyone seeing. And then Matt had to get back to work immediately again, having to stay in his new office—our shared room—the entire time.”

Add a little more sorry to that previous count. Yikes.

“So… A few days after we got there, we might’ve had a little unwanted break-out.” Jeremy shrugged their shoulders, a forced smile on their face. “And a cat came running out of his office. Which of course the others saw, and, well. You can imagine what went down.”

“But, wait.” Ky frowned, and BK felt her own mind trip over the vagueness with which Jeremy had told the story. “You mean that long-haired tabby that wanders around the base?”

“That’s the one,” Jeremy confirmed, smiling softly. “So, yeah. It’s a whole thing, and Matt doesn’t like to talk about it, so. Keep it quiet, yeah?”

“Of course,” BK assured them, even if she wasn’t quite sure what to keep quiet, exactly. “Thanks for telling us, Jeremy.”

They nodded. “Yeah, no problem. Better than letting the confusion cause problems. If there’s any pressing concerns, come ask me, okay?”

“We will,” Ky promised, and they watched Jeremy wander off before she leaned closer to BK. “So… Did you get what exactly was up with Matt?”

“No, not really,” she admitted, grimacing. “I guess he… was a cat? For a while? Somehow?”

“What, like a werecat?” Ky shook her head. “How does that even make sense?”

“Well, I don’t know!” BK snapped back, throwing her hands up. “Maybe he was cursed to be cat until the crew fixed him, or something!”

“Shh,” Ky hissed immediately, and they looked around quickly, but no one was nearby. Phew. “Well, then he might as well have been a cat originally, until he got turned into a human.”

BK hummed. “I don’t think that that works in the story. Wait. Or does it?”

“How would I know?” Ky fell silent, face twisting. “Oh my god. I’ve definitely petted him before.”

“You have?”

“Yes! Lindsay was holding him and making kissy faces and then told me I should give him a pat! How was I supposed to know otherwise!”

“Oh my god,” BK groaned, pinching the bridge of her nose. “This is too much.”

They stood there in silence for a moment, processing.

“We should tell Joe.” Ky met BK’s gaze when she snapped it over to her. “Okay, I know Jeremy said to keep it quiet, but! He’s going to find out eventually, and I’m not going to be able to keep quiet if I see him petting Matt.”

“Okay, true.” BK clicked her tongue. “Well. It should be okay right, to make sure he doesn’t ask Matt about it?”

“Yeah! Yeah, see, that makes sense,” Ky agreed nodding. “Alright. Let’s just. Go do that. Then.”

“Yes. Let’s, uh. Do that.”

---

Jeremy’s fingers tapped out a silent rhythm on the side of their phone. The moment they had stepped away from Ky and BK they had texted Lindsay to let them in on the shenanigans that had just been unleashed, and now they regularly texted with ideas on how to stoke the flames further.

Luckily Lindsay had agreed to keep it quiet from everyone else. Hopefully Ky and BK would do the same, because Jeremy really wanted to see everyone’s reactions when they found out the whole thing had happened again.

Although, admittedly, they were kind of curious to hear what those two had thought up. They had intentionally left their story very open, but still. The options were pretty limited, weren’t they?

Their phone buzzed in their hand, and they looked down. Ooh, a great new idea from Lindsay. Baking cookies shaped like cat treats to give to Matt? Brilliant!

Rapidly texted Lindsay back, they hadn’t even noticed Joe creeping up on them until he awkwardly cleared his throat.

Quickly dimming their screen, they looked up at him. “Hey Joe, what’s up?”

“You, uh.” He looked around the otherwise-empty room, the very picture of shifty, then continued at a lower tone. “You said we could ask you about Matt’s… thing.”

“His thing,” they repeated drily.

“Yeah, you know, the. Uh.” Joe stuck up a finger on each side of his head, wiggling them slightly. Like cat ears, Jeremy supposed. “You know?”

Pressing a fist to their mouth to stifle their laughter, they nodded slightly. “The cat thing? Yes. Who told you?”

“BK and—Uh. I mean. No one.” Joe cleared his throat again, awkwardly looking away. “I definitely found out on my own.”

“Sure.” They shook their head. Definitely something to keep in mind, the poor acting skills of some of the newer crew members. You never know when those kind of things come in handy! “You had a question about it?”

He nodded, shuffling a little on his feet. “Yeah, so he’s like, a werecat, right? Sometimes a human and sometimes a cat?”

Interesting. Was that the consensus that they had reached, or was that just what Joe had decided was the truth? Either way, they gestured for him to keep talking.

“So what I was wondering, um. Is he always fully human, or fully cat, or…?”

“What, like does he keep cat-like traits when he’s human, or something?” They quirked a brow at him, using the pause to quickly search through their brain. Stoke the flames, stoke the flames… “Hm. Well, you know how it is with weres: never fully one or the other.”

“So he’s like…” Joe gestured vaguely, like he was trying to grab at concepts he couldn’t reach. “A little cat?” he settled on, weakly.

“Oh yeah, for sure” they said, casually reclining on their chair. “Haven’t you noticed how he’s always prowling the base at night? That’s the were-zoomies.”

They watched Joe mouth the word ‘were-zoomies’, stifling the grin that threatened to break out on their face. Yes. Yes. Go on, fall for it.

“Right,” Joe said, slowly, like he was testing the word. “That makes sense. Uh. Sorry for bothering you with this.”

“It’s fine,” they assured him, flapping their hand. “Just make sure to keep it quiet from the rest, yeah? Especially Matt, he doesn’t like talking about it much.”

“Uh huh.” Joe nodded. “And I guess you’d know best anyway, since you’ve known him longest.”

“Exactly,” they agreed easily. “Was that all?”

“Yeah. Uh, yeah.” He shifted on his feet again. “Thanks, Jeremy. Again.”

“No problem,” they repeated, even as Joe turned around to walk away. They waited another moment or two, until they were sure that he was leaving—and that he’d really fallen for it—and then turned on their phone again to resume texting Lindsay.

They would love the new twist that had just been added to the story.

---

Idly watching a program run on the monitor in front of him, Matt hummed. “Hey, Trevor.”

“Hey Matt,” Trevor echoed dutifully, sitting on the bed behind him, Buddy in his lap.

“Do you think the new crew members have been acting weird around me?”

Because he was pretty sure they were acting weird. At first he had just assumed it was nerves over joining the crew, but then he realized it was only around him. Like they became instantly transfixed on him whenever he entered a room any of them were in.

“I don’t know.” Trevor sounded doubtful, and Matt spun around to find him frowning. “I haven’t noticed anything, but I haven’t really been paying attention to it, I guess.”

Matt hummed. “I guess I’m just worried I’m spending too much time in the office again, you know?”

“Honestly, you haven’t been that bad.” Trevor leant further back, and they both watched in silence as Buddy stretched out further in the newly gained space. “Maybe that’s why? You’re just around more to notice it, now that we’re not the new guys.”

“Maybe,” he said, doubtfully. “I don’t know. It just seems kind of weird. The last time people were acting all strange around me was, you know, when we moved in.”

“And we wouldn’t want a repeat from that.” Trevor laughed, then fell silent as he saw the look on Matt’s face. “Matt. You’re not seriously thinking about it.”

“What? It happened once, it could’ve happened again.” He shook his head. “Besides, Jeremy is absolutely the type to feed the new guys a made-up story of me being a werecat. They definitely didn’t get their fill of chaos last time around.”

“It’s not like they would’ve needed to do that.” Trevor clicked his tongue, chastising. “You still regularly grumble about missing your old cat life. It’s not like that couldn’t have caused some strange thoughts.”

Matt spluttered, “Now hold on—”

“Besides,” Trevor cut him off, mercilessly. “You also responded to Lindsay going “pspspsps” over the comms just a few days. By muting everyone else and focusing exclusively on them.”

He stared down Matt, as if daring him to defend himself again. When he didn’t, Trevor sniffed. “See? Perfectly normal reasons why people might think you’re a werecat, again, without Jeremy having done anything.”

“Right,” he agreed. Trevor kind of had a point. He did do all of those things. “But consider this: these are exactly the kind of shenanigans that Jeremy is all about.”

Trevor visibly thought about it. Then nodded. “True, true. Guess we’ll see how it all turns out, then.”

---

Paper rustled loudly as Gavin dug through the pile of wrapped presents still left in the middle of their circle. From the sidelines most of the crew was shouting at him to hurry up, either because they wanted to receive their own presents, or because they wanted to see the reactions to what they had given.

Jack just shuffled in deeper into the couch she had claimed. Some of the newer crew members might’ve been feeling uncertain about their picks—it was their first Secret Santa since Jeremy, Trevor, and Matt had joined, after all—but she knew she had made an excellent choice.

Gavin exclaimed victoriously over having found the present he’d been looking for, holding it up proudly. And then groaned when he read the label: addressed to Matt.

Smiling satisfied, she watched him accept the present. Good.

“What is it, Matt?” Joe called loudly the moment Matt begun opening the present, clearly stoked on by Alfredo sitting next to him.

“Give me a moment!” Matt called back, carefully taking apart the paper. And clearly going slow on purpose, based on the way he was grinning at the exasperated—and dramatic—groans around him.

And then he gasped, having seen the contents of his present.

Michael, sitting next to him, leaned to take a look. And then made a face. “What the hell is that?”

“It’s great is what it is!” Matt lifted up his gift to show it to the rest. And Jack knew she’d made the right choice the moment she saw it, but seeing Matt’s wide grin now filled her with pride nonetheless.

In Matt’s hands, he held a knitted sweater. An unbelievably obnoxious, very ugly, and very grandma-style knitted sweater. With a cat theme.

“I love it!” he exclaimed, even as Jeremy, on his other side, made a loud gagging noise. “Wait—”

And then he pulled it on over the hoodie he’d been wearing, wiggling slightly to get it to sit right. And just as she had guessed, it was just slightly oversized for him.

“Oh, it’s so nice.” Matt rubbed one arm of the sweater, plucking at it slightly. “It’s so warm and soft! I love it. Thank you, Secret Santa!”

“It’s atrocious,” Jeremy spat out like they couldn’t hold it in any longer. “Matt, look at it!”

“I am looking at it.” Matt grinned at Jeremy like a cat who’d gotten the cream. “Here, just feel it, Jeremy. Gimme a pat.”

Jeremy rolled their eyes but obliged, patting Matt’s arm briefly. Then they sighed. “Yeah, alright, I’ll give you that. It’s very soft.”

“Told you.” Matt shook his arms slightly, letting the too-long sleeves fall over his hands. “Oh, right, my turn to pick a present. Hm, let’s see…”

---

Matt absentmindedly twirled the glass in his hand, watching the liquid in it swish around. Ever since he and Trevor had realized that BK, Ky, and Joe thought he was a—a werecat or something, he had become aware of just how much they stared at him. It was like, equal parts fascinated and terrified. So probably werecat then? Were they thinking about him just suddenly turning into a cat in front of them, or something?

He didn’t know, and quite frankly, he had no idea how to ask.

Up went the glass as he took a drink from it. Nope, still no idea.

And the three of them were still staring, on the other side of the table.

Really, when Trevor had suggested that Matt just go out with them for a night to find a way to bring it up, he’d thought that Trevor would’ve come along. But nooo, that would’ve been too easy, huh? Had to go and do this all alone.

How the fuck were you supposed to start a conversation about this, anyway?

“So,” BK blurted out suddenly, leaning forward on her elbows, “When you turn into a cat, does that hurt? Like, is that why you never do it?”

“When I what?” he answered automatically, somehow feeling caught off-guard despite wanting to get into this exact conversation.

Also, apparently that is how you start a conversation about this kind of stuff. He’d consider it good to know, but he was really kind of hoping not to get into this situation a third time.

Groaning, he pinched his nose. “I’m not a werecat, or whatever Jeremy told you three.”

“But the—the were-zoomies.” Joe gestured around the last word as if to emphasize it.

“The what?” He shook his head, setting the thought aside. “Look. I don’t know what Jeremy convinced you three of, but I can guarantee you it’s not real. Although I guess that that does explain why Buddy has been begging for more attention from the rest of us…”

“Buddy?” Ky repeated cautiously.

“Yeah. Buddy the cat.” He pulled up a photo on his phone, even though he was sure they all knew exactly who he was talking about. “See? That’s our cat. Mine, Jeremy’s, and Trevor’s, before we moved in with the rest of the crew. I’m sure you’ve seen him around.”

“But—But—” BK spluttered, and then fell silent when he swiped over to a photo of him holding Buddy. “Oh.”

“Yeah, exactly.” He rolled his eyes, tucking his phone away again. “Honestly, it’s kind of unbelievable this happened again. Although I guess it doesn’t really count if Jeremy orchestrated this on purpose…”

“But I heard you complain about missing being a cat!” BK gestured at him. “What does that even mean!”

He nodded slowly. “I assume Jeremy told you about how, when I first joined the crew, no one saw or heard me? They only knew me by name? So, somehow, they wrongly start to think—"

---

“JEREMY!”

They looked up from the game they had been playing. Was that BK? Hadn’t she gone out with Ky, Joe, and Matt?

The door slammed open, and they spun around on their chair. Standing in the opening were all three of the new crew members. The crew members they had tricked into thinking Matt was a werecat.

“So uh.” They looked between the three fuming crew members. “You figured it out, huh?”

“I’m going to kill you!” BK snarled, making grabbing hands at them from where she still stood. “You asshole! Months!”

“Oh yeah, you really fell for it.” They giggled, ignoring the way the three of them crept further into the room. “But hey, now you get to join the club with the rest of crew! You’re fitting in just right!”

“You’ll fit in just right in the hole you’re about to make in the ground,” Ky growled, stepping up to them. “Because we’re about to drop you off of the roof.”

They looked over to Joe. Who shook his head. “Oh no, I’m with them.”

“Shame.” They shrugged, putting down their controller. “Ah well. Worth it.”

Buddy meowed from the corner of the desk where he’d been sitting.

So worth it.

#ah fanfic #ah fanfiction #fake ah crew #fahc #dark writes #anyway you might think this is a case of a fandom writer suddenly going RPF but it's actually the reverse #AH was the very first fandom I ever wrote for #the good ol' roots

[sorcererinthestars]

I like to think that fahc Geoff takes a break from the stress of the job and does his own things for a while, and he worries about visiting in with the crew again in case they’ve moved on and he’s not in with the jokes they make now or they don’t like hanging out with him anymore. He decides to give it one try, if they’ve moved on and don’t need him anymore that’s okay, but he gets the exact reaction of a dad getting home from work. He walks into the penthouse and gets out all of a “hey-“ before half the crew vaults over the couch to go greet him, all yelling and smiling and he doesn’t know if Gavin’s trying to hug him or climb him but Geoff’s heart is warm and it doesn’t take much convincing for him to visit again

I really love this. I kind of figure Geoff has pretty much permanently retired and like you said (if this is a universe w/out OT5), he sort of does his own thing. He is one of the richest men on the planet after all their heists, so he hires Trevor to be in charge of the day-to-day and starts to travel the world. See all the places he’s always wanted to go, visit with friends and family he has across the globe, just being the man he’s always wanted to be now that money isn’t a factor. And yeah, I imagine after one longer trip that spans a few months he does worry if the others are going to resent him or be upset when he comes home. So he procrastinates a while, right? But eventually he misses them so fucking much that he has to go see them. If they’re upset, he’ll take that as the signal he needs to finally, permanently, get a new place somewhere and give them the space to be the next generation of the Fake AH Crew without the infamous Ramsey. Except, as you say, he is greeted by a screaming pile of estatic children with Jack trying to wade through their midst to give him a kiss on the cheek and welcome him home. Home. No one thought anything of Geoff going wandering, but they all scream ‘welcome home’ enough that he knows he’ll always have a space there. Matt immediately offers him a controller to play Mario Kart and Michael can’t stay away from him for more than two seconds at a time and Gavin eagerly rambles off the things he learned and Jeremy and Trevor and Alfredo want to see all the cool photos and gifts from his travels and Fiona and Lindsay keep bothering him to watch the scary movies they put aside to only watch with him and ... Well, one thing’s for sure. The Fake AH Crew can survive just fine without Geoffrey Ramsey at the helm. But it doesn’t mean they don’t *want* him there. Quite the opposite. And woe betide Los Santos when Geoff Ramsey comes back for one more game.... 

#fahc #fake ah crew #geoff ramsey #ragehappy #if you want it to be

[writerofshit]

I will always be a sucker for Fakes who are a lot more caring than people assume so imagine Matt still a little new to the penthouse assuming that slacking on work will be big trouble, so he works on a hack until he passes out at his desk. He wakes up a few hours later to find his hat stolen, his hair braided and a blanket tucked around his shoulders. When he emerges from his cave to apologise, Jack pulls him aside to chastise him (“If you’re tired go to bed asshole, don’t sleep at a desk that’s how you fuck up your neck”)

!!!

We love an aggressively caring family!

Matt's always been such a workaholic, even before joining the crew. Only gets worse when he's got access to resources to actually do something with that tendency. It seems to him like the rest of the crew never stops, someone always on a mission of some sort or plotting another when they're not.

So yeah, he figures he'd better do his best to keep up. Geoff had asked him to help Gavin with hacking into some government somebody's accounts, a nice little thing to keep in their back pockets if they needed. It proves to be more difficult than it should be, days of trying different techniques to no avail.

On the third day, even Gavin is ready to give up. It would be good information to have but you can only try something so many times. Matt's convinced he can do it, that he's almost there. Waves Gavin off when told he should get some rest. He will, he swears, just as soon as he gives one more thing a shot.

One more turns to two, turns to five, turns to him passed out in front of his computer.

Lindsay's the first one to find him, along with Michael. Michael snatches his hat ("mine keep going fuckin missing, what do you want from me?") and Lindsay tells him to go get Jeremy.

"Y'all two are the strongest, you've got the best chance of moving him to the couch without waking him up." In the meantime, she braids his hair. When the boys return and question her about it she just shrugs. "Like he'd ever stop fucking working long enough for me to do it this properly. I saw my chance and I took it."

The boys move him to the couch, tuck a blanket over him and head back upstairs.

When Matt wakes up, he's immediately disoriented, unsure where he is. He doesn't remember laying on the couch, or braiding his hair or- yeah, he definitely didn't leave that donut just sitting there. Oh fuck, someone must have come in. Which means they know he fell asleep on the job. Fantastic.

After he eats the donut (hes gotta have his sustenance in order to deal with the lecture he's sure to get) he goes to apologize.

"Jack, I am so sorry-"

"Yeah. You should be." Jack's got her arms crossed and she's giving him this look that definitely reads 'I'm not mad, just disappointed'

"I know, I was up late and I was tired and-"

"Then go to bed."

"It won't- what?"

Jack's face softens. "If you're tired, go to bed. Take a break. Don't sleep in your chair like an asshole, that's how you fuck up your neck."

"I was just trying to figure those accounts. Do my job, you know." He'd been expecting a lecture, sure, but not like this.

"While I appreciate that, accounts can wait. Take care of yourself first." She looks behind him briefly, and then back. Matt glances over his shoulder just in time to see Gavin disappear behind the corner. "He told me about last night." Jack says, nodding in his direction.

"Told you we still haven't gotten anywhere?"

"Told me you're always staying later than he is. That you don't ever clock the fuck out and relax." Jack says matter of factly.

"Not really a 'clock the fuck out' kinda job, is it?" Matt asks with a dry laugh.

"Sure it is. You watch Gavin do it every night. He reaches a point he knows hes not gonna make any progress, and he lets it go for the night. Has a drink, something to eat, relaxes." Jack shakes her head. "I don't say this often, but you could stand to learn a thing or two from Gav."

"Wow, you must've really fucked up if she's telling you to follow Gavin's lead on something." Michael announces from the door way.

"Gavin's smarter than you guys give him credit for." Jack says with a smile.

Michael rolls his eyes. "Yeah, I know. God, can we be done with Family Therapy Hour now? Jeremy's got 500 on Matt winning Mario Kart, and I cant wait to take his money."

Matt's about to protest, remind them that hes got work to do, but the look in Jack's eyes keeps him from trying. "Uh, well, prepare to be disappointed."

"And to be a thousand bucks poorer." Jack tacks on, following them to the living room. "I'll put 500 on Matt, too." She says, pushing him on the shoulder gently.

"No pressure at all, thanks guys." Matt mutters, only half meaning it.

As he sits there on a Wednesday afternoon playing Mario Kart, there's a part of him that feels like he should be down in his office, trying to get access to those accounts. When he wins the first two races, that part shrinks. It's still there, distantly reminding him that he should be working on something important.

Over the next couple of hours, while Jeremy lifts him in up in celebration, and Michael hollers about "fucking bullshit" and Lindsay giggles and Gavin begs for yet another shot and Jack just laughs at them all, he thinks maybe he's working on the most important thing of all.

#i really just... went on an on didnt i? #ANYWAY that end got really sappy but it be like that sometimes #we love a found family ok?? #and we love a family who cares aggressively and makes each other take care of themselves #even when that care is kicking ass in mario kart #genuinely i do love this thought and i couldnt help but expand it #fahc #ks talks #somegrumpynerd

[ursifors]

ah fallout au no one asked for... i am sick  so idk if i missed anyone but yeah

jeremy - vault dweller, there are many vaults tho and i definitely wouldn’t put him in 111 because im not about to fridge kat, so i think he’d be like some normal vault like 81, free to come and go as he pleases. i would make him a supermutant because i think it’d be funny but also he’s so short and i refuse to sacrifice that even for comedy. he’s also from boston so i think having him be from a location in fallout 4 simply makes sense.

lindsay - ghoul, but i think also like a very moira character? but more genuine and in-touch. bc everyone fucking hates moira but i think lindsay being a ghoul but having that like ALRIGHTY!! :D attitude suits them. they probably were turned into a ghoul post-war, i’d say very new, only like 50 years or so old, born and raised in the wasteland.

michael - wastelander, he doesn’t have time for bullshit and isn’t wet behind the ears like a vault dweller would be. leads a simple life and keeps to himself mostly, probably runs a shop with lindsay? but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a suit of power armor and will crush a raider with his bare hands if he has to.

gavin - also a vault dweller, because i can’t explain any other reason for his accent other than a vault with british people in it FOR SOME REASON??? vault 76 seems good bc of the lore, i can see him being from parents who were very smart bc he is extremely smart, and i think it would be funny to see him try to boast about this and michael just hit him with something and tell him he talks funny.

jack / geoff / fiona - farmers, DUH. i see jack having a spot like abernathy farm, where i can also see geoff and fiona living, where they all just grow tatos and raise brahmin in their peaceful little corner of the wasteland. though fiona is always getting into trouble and exploring on her own.

matt / trevor - they’d be like some wastelanders who have holed up in a bunker and built elaborate traps and have protectrons patrolling and turrets, the whole 9 yards. everything is security locked via terminals. jeremy befriends them by seeing their traps and instead of falling into them or disabling them, using them to trap and kill nearby ferals to conserve ammo, impressing them in the process.

alfredo - fredo seems like such a weird sidequest character like that guy who gives you reba ii who lives alone in a house in an abandoned town infested with mirelurks. like alfredo is just amusing himself sniping bugs and ferals and any passing enemy from the roof of a house.

ify - ify is sensible and would live in a settlement, i can see him being a smart trader and very capable. maybe owning an arms store? which is where he would meet michael (and most of the others) when they come to buy guns from him. but he’s like the kind of person who like, would have you do a quest and then you can have him as a follower. 

#p #fo au #logan speaks

[staranon95]

a return to basics

a red hood au drabble

Michael has always thought of Geoff as like a dad. He did have those tendencies to pick up plucky youths off the street and pseudo adopt him. Hell, Geoff picked up Gavin when he was fifteen. He had a habit of picking up those who needed a little help. And also those with skills he thought he could make use of for his then fledgling crime empire. Geoff isn’t the most altruistic of people. There are things that he wants. But since his retirement, Geoff has been taking it easy. He’s been enjoying the limelight of being a socialite in the eyes of Los Santos’s high society. He likes making surprise donations to charities and people in need.

Michael likes the guy. He really does. He took this angry twenty-year old, street smart, smartass and taught him patience. Taught him how to put his skills to good use and make something out of himself. Michael has a lot of respect for Geoff, so it feels like a bit of a kick in the teeth when they need to call Geoff (and by association Jack) down from his retirement house up in the Vinewood hills to address the current situation about Alfredo. Red. Whatever.

They meet up at the Jones’ house as it’s one of the more secure locations and the new safehouse is still being fixed up with all the trimmings. Geoff sweeps in with all the fanfare of a man in his late forties who’s fully comfortable in how much money he has and enjoying early retirement.

“Ey-oh,” is how Geoff introduces himself, hands firmly in his pants pockets, wearing a blazer jacket that doesn’t fit with his jeans and sneakers, but he’s rich. He can do whatever the fuck he wants.

“Geoff,” Lindsay says. “You’re early.”

“You would not believe the traffic from Vinewood,” he says. “It’s an absolute mess.”

“Like you were the one driving,” Jack says, coming in from behind him and immediately moving for the one large recliner in the living room. “So where are the others?”

“They’ll be here soon,” Michael says. “Trevor’s just going to pick up Gavin.”

“Oh, right, Gavin,” Geoff says, perching on one of the armrests of the recliner. “How is bird boy doing?”

“Not fucking great, Geoff. Not fucking great.”

Geoff only hums and Michael can’t blame him for his apparent apathy. Alfredo’s death is what started pushing Geoff into considering retirement and washing his hands of the whole crime empire thing. When it hits you that close to home, anyone would consider leaving the life, and Geoff did for the most part.

The others arrive within the hour and only Fiona is unaccounted for. Michael pulls out his phone to fire off a text in her direction, but he trusts her. She’s probably caught up in one of her personal jobs, and the crew gets it. Most people have a side gig going on, and seeing as she was brought onto the crew in a post-Alfredo time, this doesn’t actually concern her all that much.

But still. It’s odd that she’s not here. Especially considering how close she is with Jack.

“So,” Geoff says. “Someone want to give me the rundown of skeletons coming out from the closets?”

“Oh my god,” Lindsay mutters, and Michael puts a hand on their shoulder. Geoff has never been known for his tact.

So they start from the beginning. The man-formerly-known-as-Alfredo entering their lives and causing general mischief. Ruining jobs, exposing the raid on the penthouse, and being a nuisance.

“Okay, so that’s that, I suppose,” Geoff says, then he turns expectantly towards Gavin.

Michael hasn’t had time to talk to Gavin since he came back from his excursion throughout the city. A quiet Gavin is never a good Gavin.

“Gavin,” Jack says.

Gavin brings his eyes up from the floor. “I found him,” he says. “He . . . Red was having a talk with someone else. A woman who’s called Violet. They were saying something about Prism. The head of their group Spectrum, I guess? Violet was trying to blame Red for tipping us off about the raid on the penthouse.”

“So that means he’s trying to watch out for us,” Trevor says, and Michael shakes his head. Poor, dumb, optimistic Trevor.

“We can’t read into that,” Michael says. “Like, I get it. We all want Alfredo back. But this guy . . . we can’t see him as Alfredo. Because he isn’t. And based on what Gavin is saying, he doesn’t want to be Alfredo either. We don’t know what his motives are.”

Geoff nods along. “We never encountered anyone involved with Spectrum or Prism before. For now, I suggest we all start looking into it. Keeping low profiles. No more big jobs until we can put some pieces together. Spread out the investments in case they try to freeze our assets. If Red is working with them, we need to clean out all our hold safehouses and pick out new ones. We are starting from scratch, okay?”

Ah. Michael’s missed this. Geoff’s no-jokes attitude to set everyone right.

With the meeting concluded (mostly), Michael stands to approach Gavin. “Hey, boy,” he says softly.

Gavin drags his eyes up to him and Michael can see how exhausted he is.

Off to the side, he can hear Jack’s phone ringing.

“You ever feel like we’re living some comic book life?” Gavin says. “I mean. You and I fought a guy in a duck mask for Christ’s sake.”

“It does feel pretty stupid.”

“And now we have this whole rainbow thing?”

“Fiona, hey, what’s up?”

“I get it,” Michael says. “But if you’re going off chasing it for the pot of gold, just hit me up. You know I’m always down for a good time.”

“Right, okay. I’ll be right there.”

Michael turns to see Jack getting to her feet. “Where you headed?”

“Fiona called,” she says. “She didn’t have a lot to say, but I need to head out.”

“Don’t worry about me,” Geoff says as she retreats. He slides into the empty recliner. “I’ll get myself home somehow.”

“You usually do,” Jack says before she steps out of the house.

“So,” Michael says, turning back to Gavin. “You got anything to share with the class about your epic nighttime journey?”

Gavin whines and stretches out on the couch, uncaring as he splays himself over Trevor and Matt. “Why can’t life be simple?”

“Because you decided to follow Geoff into crime,” Michael says.

“You made your bed. Now you gotta lie in it,” Lindsay says.

“Spill the details, boy. What did Red say exactly?”

#star speaks #star writes #fake ah crew #red hood au #fahc #guess who's back finally lmao

[treh-co]

FAHC Headcanons

So I feel like a good amount of my hcs are a lot different than other people’s??? And I’ve done a LOT of thinking abt them so! Here’s kind of like a masterlist of my general hcs! I’m just gonna go through this person-by-person.

(This got Kinda Long, so it’s under a read more. Sorry mobile users,)

Geoff

Obviously, he’s the one who started The Fakes. Basically, he went into the military after high school, came back and was like “Damn. Hated that” and then some old friends are like “Hey wanna do crime” and he was like “Fuck it”. That ended up being the beginning of The Roosters, which would grow to become the most powerful crime syndicate in Los Santos.

However, when they started shifting more towards managing the organizations they controlled, Geoff felt like he was missing the hands-on action. With the others’ blessing, he branched out to create his own gang under the syndicate, which would be the Fakes.

Geoff was the acting boss, supervisor, and manager of the Fakes for many years, while still juggling responsibilities with the Roosters. After a while, he felt the stress of it all begin to weigh on him, so he decided to pass some of it off. He made Trevor the acting supervisor of the crew’s regular business, while he handed management of behind-the-scenes matters to Lindsay. He’s still technically the boss, though, and any Big decisions go through him.

Jack

Jack actually met Geoff when they were in the military together. While he was a journalist, she was a pilot, and while she’d always been a sort of straight-laced, innocent kid growing up, she discovered that she actually loved flying. More than that, she loved the excitement of a chase or a gunfight. When she got back, she found herself bored.

That was around when Geoff called her up with an offer- one that not only allowed her to get back in the cockpit, but promised twice the action way more money than she ever got in the military. Of course, she said yes.

Jack’s main role in the crew is transport and evac. She can fly or drive anything, from a city bus to speedboat to a cargobob. Unofficially, she’s a sort of second-in-command for Geoff. He usually discusses any business stuff with her before making decisions. She’s also probably the most capable medic in the main crew, though she’s not an expert, and will pass off the responsibility if they have access to someone more formally trained.

Gavin

I imagine Gavin comes from a criminal family. Nothing exciting; standard white-collar stuff, embezzlement and fraud. They were substantially wealthy from their exploits and sent him to private school and all that, but Gavin found it all horribly boring. By the time he reached high school, he was experimenting with every type of low-level crime he could think of; theft and vandalism, all that shit.

Eventually, his habit of making enemies got him in over his head, and eventually he found himself in serious hot water. Out of options, he forged some papers and got a flight out of Britain. He’d far from learnt his lesson, though. He didn’t plan on cleaning up his act, and he decided to hide in plain sight, in the most crime-infested city America had to offer- Los Santos.

That was where he met Geoff. He was working odd jobs around the city, still new to America (and, though he’d never admit it, pretty lost and scared- he’s only sixteen). He gets hired by some asshole to take out Geoff, and he isn’t familiar enough with the scene to know better, so he goes for it. When Geoff has the knife out of his hands and a gun pointed at his head in less than two seconds, he’s pretty sure he’s fucked- but Geoff doesn’t shoot. Because fuck, how the hell is he supposed to take out this scrawny, terrified kid? So he talks to him instead, and when he finds out that Gavin has no loyalties to the guy that hired him and has a much broader skill set than Geoff would have expected, he decides to take him in.

As for my take on The Golden Boy- I personally don’t see Gavin as a hacker, and tbh I personally Cannot picture him suave enough to be some smooth-talking informant. In my mind, he’s sort of the crew’s everyman. He does a little bit of everything- stealth, dealing, hacking, fighting- he isn’t really an expert at any of it, but if you need something done, he probably knows enough to help. 

Michael

Michael was raised in New Jersey with his brothers. His life was fairly normal, to be honest. He got a gig as an electrician, and it sucked, but he was doing okay. And then his mom got sick, and things started falling apart. Long story short, he ended up turning to more unsavory ways to get the money she needed for her treatment. He found out that he was pretty good at making bombs, and even better at cracking skulls. 

Michael only ever dipped into those practices to help his mom, but once you go in, it’s pretty hard to get out. He was running with a gang in New Jersey for a long time, until one day, their leader sold them out to the cops. He and some friends ran away to Los Santos, but still got caught, and suddenly he was locked up in a LS prison.

It was in prison that he met this guy named Gavin. After bonding through some good old fashioned prison fighting and saving each other’s asses, Gavin told him that he’s part of a powerful gang that was planning on breaking him out. He said that he needed help with the prep work they  needed done on from the inside, and if Michael helped him, they’d break him out with Gavin. Against every instinct, Michael agreed, and they broke out together. After they got out, Geoff decided to offer Michael a job- partly because he was impressed with him, and partly because Gavin wouldn’t stop whining until he did.

Michael is great for a steady gun or a good fight on missions, but his expertise is in demolitions. He’s self-taught, but he’s one of the best in the business, and he has fun with what he does.

Lindsay

Lindsay has always thrived on chaos. This presented itself more innocently in her childhood, but once she reached her teen years, it quickly spiraled into something more dangerous. She was always looking for something more risky, more exciting. Speeding, then shoplifting, then vandalism; it was never enough.

That being said, it shouldn’t have been that big of a surprise when some friends easily talked her into her first burglary. From then on, it was an easy slide into the more serious world of crime. She was a gun for hire by twenty, had long left her well-meaning parents behind, travelling with no real goal and making both allies and enemies everywhere she went.

When she cropped up in Los Santos, trailing gunfire and spray-paint cat tags where she went, Geoff knew she was meant to be one of them. He hired her for some odd jobs at first, just to make sure; but just a few looks at her style proved his theory. He offered her permanent position and she took it on a whim.

True to her role, Lindsay is the crew’s wildcard. Sort of like Gavin, except her skills are more specifically in the “fuck shit up” range.

Jeremy

Born and raised in Boston, Jeremy had a not-so-great home life and started hanging with the wrong crowds from a young age. He grew up through fistfights and car wrecks, and by the time he was grown, he didn’t really know anything else. He was actually pretty close with his gang back home. They were the ones who taught him the importance of loyalty; how important it is to have people you can trust. Nothing good lasts forever, though. When another gang- much bigger, much stronger- started picking them off, their leader made the tough choice to disband. Despite communal reluctance, she got them all set up to go underground in different parts of the country. Jeremy was sent to Los Santos.

While there, Jeremy saved a boy he saw being jumped in an alley. The boy turned out to be a hacker and information dealer named Matt. Jeremy was homeless at the time, and Matt offered to let him stay at his place as thanks. Somehow, this quickly turned into them being roommates and friends, and then partners, when they decided it would be a good idea for Jeremy to tag along on Matt’s deals for protection.

While helping Matt, Jeremy made a name for himself in underground fighting rings, known by his half-joke moniker “Rimmy Tim”. One night, a non-regular sat in to watch the fight, and afterwards approached him with an offer. The stranger was one Geoff Ramsey, and the offer was for a job with the Fakes. Jeremy happened to know who the Fakes were- and be a big fan of their work. He was nervous, but he accepted the offer, and it only took a few weeks for them to essentially pull him in.

Jeremy is, in simple terms, the crew’s muscle. He drives, he shoots, and most importantly, he can fight. If anything needs doing that involves those three things, he’s good for it.

Matt

Matt grew up in a small, boring town with a small, boring family. He filled his boredom with the digital world. Eventually, he started diving deeper; learning how to code, and then how to program, and then how to hack. By the time he was seventeen, Matt was going by the alias of “Axial” on dark-web forums, dealing information and breaking into everything from private systems to locked-down, international servers.

After turning eighteen, Matt decided he was sick of his home town and used the money he’d gained from his illegal business to disappear and move somewhere more exciting- Los Santos. After a few months of living there, he met a boy named Jeremy, who saved him from a deal gone wrong. He liked Jeremy, and it seemed like Jeremy liked him; despite the suspicions they both probably should have had in their lines of work, they became fast friends and roommates, deciding to work together.

When Jeremy got hired by the Fakes, Matt was disappointed, but resigned to the fact that he would be back on his own. Until he was pulled away from his work one night to a knock at the door, and found the Vagabond there, ready to take him to the penthouse. Apparently, the crew had been in need of a hacker for a while; and a certain new member had put in quite the good word for him.

Matt is, obviously, the crew’s hacker. He doesn’t really go on the field too much; he’ll tag along if there’s a proximity requirement on his part, or if a bunch of people are unavailable and they really need a backup driver or something, but for the most part he operates from the penthouse. He’s usually on comms during the heists to give directions or help with security or recon in real-time.

Trevor [TW: Sex work mention]

Trevor grew up in a trailer park in Blaine County, raised by a single mom. She loved him, but was involved with all the wrong people. When an altercation with an ex-boyfriend ended up deadly, fourteen-year-old Trevor up and ran as fast as he could, and ended up in the streets of Los Santos. He got by with begging and soup kitchens at first, but he started picking up tricks, on his own or from others he watched. Pickpocketing, manipulation, shoplifting; whatever he could use to get a bit of an advantage, he took.

It was just a while after he turned eighteen that a man he met outside a bar proposed he enter a different “path” of business. Trevor was reluctant, but he was also desperate, and the man made a lot of promises. He ended up spending two years as a prostitute, until one night he’d had enough. He killed the man who’d been selling him and ran once again. 

Once again faced with life on the streets, he returned to what he knew he was good at- lying and stealing. He came up with the alias of Reached, and became a thief and informant by commission, fairly well-known. He became close associates- maybe even friends, if such a thing existed in Los Santos- with another duo, Rimmy Tim and Axial. One day, they gave him a call- saying their new employers needed someone with his skills on a job. To make a long story short, when the Fakes met Trevor, he was pretty much already a part of the team.

Trevor is a thief by trade. Stealth, deception, and stealing is what he does best. He’s a master lock picker and an expert at slight of hand, and is far too good at putting on an innocent face. 

Alfredo

Alfredo was raised by a big, loving family; but people are a product of their environment. A combination of wrong place, wrong time, and peer pressure had him messing around with local gangs far before he should have even seen a gun. But Alfredo always had a knack for precision, and he had the aim of a trained vet, and he was probably a little too busy being cocky to understand the risks he was taking.

Eventually, those risks caught up with him. He was in a lot of hot water and he knew his family was in danger. He couldn’t let them get hurt on his account, so he ran to protect them. He considered turning a new leaf when he got to Los Santos, but quickly realized that if that was the plan, he’d picked the wrong place to do it. It wasn’t long before he was dragged back into work as a gun for hire.

He was good- really good, and when some hot shot rolls into the city with a sniper and skills like that, it shakes things up, and word gets around. Word even gets to some of the most powerful men in the city- including Geoff Ramsey, who decides that if this kid is really as good as he’s heard, there’s no way he’s letting him get snatched up by anybody else first. His invite to Alfredo is more short-notice than it was with the others, but he and the crew click in about two seconds flat, so it really doesn’t take a lot of convincing.

Obviously, Alfredo is their sniper. He’s a hell of a shot with any gun, and can do fine with up-close combat when he needs to, but he’s at his best when he’s giving cover from a rooftop.

Fiona

Fiona comes from one of France’s most infamous criminal organizations. Her parents run the group, and she was raised, essentially, as the heir to the business. She’s been trained since she was a child to be the best at any skill she might need. An array of languages, hand to hand combat in five forms, dozens of weapons, from blades to melee to guns- most of all, she studied deception.

There was a small problem, though. Fiona appreciated everything her family did for her- but there was also no way in hell she was just going to drag on the family business. She wanted to make a name for herself, and she wanted more than the stuffy, starch-white world they were giving her. So she ran away to America. She spent a few years travelling, testing out different paths. At one point, she ended up in long-term employment with a gang. Except she ended up hating said gang, and she wanted out.

Luck happened to be on her side. One day, she was told that they’d kidnapped two people who happened to be members of a powerful crew called the Fakes. Fiona knew the second she laid eyes on the two- a strangely similar looking pair named Trevor and Alfredo- that they were her ticket out. She made a deal with them, that she’d let them escape if they took her with them and kept her safe, and the three of them had a wild adventure that lasted about a week, and ended in the three of them strolling into the penthouse, ragged and exhausted but looking like they’d just had the time of their lives, with Trevor and Alfredo proudly declaring that Fiona was now their newest member.

Fiona is a master of disguise. She’s good at a lot of things, but putting on an act is what really sets her apart. Give her a wig and a makeup kit and she can turn herself into a new person in five minutes flat- complete with an accent and everything. She’s the go-to when the crew need undercover jobs done.

#fahc #fake ah crew #fake achievement hunter crew #fahc geoff #fahc jack #fahc ryan #fahc gavin #fahc michael #fahc lindsay #fahc jeremy #fahc matt #fahc trevor #fahc alfredo #fahc fiona #headcanons #ghost archives

[redfire-blackash-whitegold]

Headcanon that Ryan sometimes goes out on heists with the crew as just a human person with a backwards cap and a teeshirt instead of the Vagabond gear.

For the purposes of this headcanon, Ryan wears the mask for mostly aesthetic reasons. And maybe some psychological, but mostly in the ‘I was nervous so I wore a mask’ kind of way.

Also in this headcanon the people of Los Santos don’t actually recognize Ryan as the Vagabond. Since the Fakes have so many members, they have a tendency to switch up faces every once in a while, so it’s not exactly strange to see the Vagabond missing from one heist or another. It’s assumed that he’s busy on a less showy job, or recuperating from an injury, or else a liability on this particular mission for one reason or another. They usually have one of their hard hitters with them, but almost never all of them, so it’s not strange for Michael or Jeremy or Lindsay or the Vagabond or any combination thereof to be gone from the public view for a little while. And then which members do join the heist, that varies even more. USUALLY Jack will be there as a getaway, but sometimes it’s Jeremy in the car, or Matt. Whether Gavin’s there or not is a complete toss up, Fiona and Alfredo are almost never on the same job as one another, and every once in a while the boss might poke their head out of hiding and be on the scene. So it’s not weird that the Vagabond is missing. And it’s not even weird to see a rare face in the public eye.

But no one has ANY idea who the HELL Ryan is. 

There are a hundred theories floating around, as to what exactly his role in the crew is, or else where he came from: a mechanic, a freelancer, a civilian who said fuck it and jumped the line from hostage to hostage taker, afterwords just kind of sticking around. Curious civilians and reporters spend hours pouring over the meagre footage, trying to determine any kind of specialty. There were two things that made that task difficult. One: everyone in the FAHC had all the same basic skills, fight, shoot, steal. They all had their own style, their own way of doing that, and their own specialties outside of that, usually. Ryan meanwhile was dressed as a normal guy and had no distinct aesthetic style, but then didn’t try to blend in with the crowds or attempt any deception. Nor did he have a particularly showy way of doing “fight shoot steal.” Ryan looked and acted in a way that made him the closest thing the FAHC got to “default.” Two: only what was caught on tape could be analysed. There was no telling what went on within the doors of the bank, let alone at their hideout. If he had a specialty, no one knew what it was. This was pretty common, no one knew Gavin’s real job for the first year he joined, most people thought Michael was a soldier rather than a demolitions expert for at first. Hell, no one knew who Matt was until the cyber crimes division started bitching about him to reporters, and no one knew what Fiona did until she broke someone’s kneecap and everyone collectively decided it didn’t matter. 

Ryan looks like he could be strong, maybe, seemed decently good with guns but not in any notable way. There was some fridge logic to be had with regards to his “everyday” attire, that kind of thought you have late at night when you’ve gotten out of bed to get a glass of water and you realize that he’s the only one not wearing a bulletproof vest. That he’s actually a lot more badass than he seems on the surface. Still, he never seems to do the same job, was on crowd control once, vault duty another time, held the line on a third occasion, and that made him very hard to pin down. 

In actuality, showing up as “Ryan” one day was an impulsive choice he made, when he had been sleeping in and didn’t want to change into the uncomfortable leather and stifling mask in his still-drowsy state. He threw on some jeans, kept the shirt he had been sleeping in, and threw his hair into the messiest ponytail and covered it up with a hat. Later, it came up a couple more times, the store he was shopping at got robbed and he was in no mood to play civilian, Jeremy had stolen his jacket and Michael had painted his mask pink and it just wasn’t worth it to fix those things before the heist started in twenty minutes; at least three times he went out with his glasses instead of his usual contacts, because there was a problem with them, because his eyes had been dry lately, because he left his replacements at the penthouse while they were holed up in a safehouse for a couple days. 

And no one puts it together because when the Vagabond is finally revealed it’s going to be dramatic right? We’re going to have a great moment like Rorschach’s “give me back my face!” or be treated to some monologue about how he wears it when he kills, or learn that it’s the only thing stopping him from going truly insane with all the things he’s done, or else learn that he’s been leading a normal life underneath it all. Surely it means something right? Surely there’s something sacred to the mask? Surely it’s not something that he can simply drop idly whenever he feels like it. Right?

#fahc #fake ah crew #fahc ryan

[tiikeria]

Patron of the Poor, Protector of Outcasts

Title: Patron of the Poor, Protector of Outcasts Ship(s): None Rating: T Warning(s): Language Words: 1,874 words Summary: “I am Midas, God of Gold. Patron of the Poor and Protector of Outcasts. Wherever poverty and the downtrodden go, I’m needed. And Los Santos was full of it.” Notes: Huh. Two fics in two weeks? Am I feeling okay? I also have a third planned, and my lovely co-creator Pchew has one going as well. We like this AU bit too much. Anyway, enjoy!

Gavin didn’t like showing off what he could do. The more you played close to yourself, the more people underestimated you. That’s how he got such a reputation as a bumbling idiot. No one suspected the dumb one to swindle you out of everything, now did they?

But something was endearing about the childlike wonder Michael and Jeremy watched him with when he used his powers. Even the smallest thing seemed to capture their attention. His fellow Lads were so curious about what he could do, and, honestly, it was refreshing. Normally people regarded the gold from his hands with distrust and fear.

“So, what can you make?” Jeremy asked one afternoon, a lazy Sunday playing games and just enjoying each other’s company, “I mean, with the gold. Like, can you shape it, or is it just a flood, like before?”

Michael snorted, putting down his controller, “Jeremy just wants to know if you can make him a golden Spyro.”

“I do not!”

Gavin laughed, but produced the aforementioned dragon in his palm, shining brilliantly in the afternoon sun, “Shame, that, because I happen to have one, yeah?”

Jeremy’s pure joy and awe almost made him blush, “Okay, I do really want a golden Spyro, holy shit that is so fucking cool.”

“You think everything Spyro is cool, though.”

“I’m a simple man,” Jeremy stated, still staring longingly at the golden figure in Gavin’s hand, “I see Spyro, I’m happy. Same thing with whiskey.”

Giggles erupt from Gavin’s lips as he tosses the dragon to Jeremy, “Sorry, I can’t make golden whiskey. That’ll have to do.”

Michael huffs as Jeremy cradles his new toy like a father cradles a newborn, “What about me? What do I get? How dare you gift this schmuck something before you gift your Boi something! Does Boiship mean nothing to you, anymore!?”

“Michael, no, Michael!” More laughter bubbled from Gavin’s chest, “You’re my Boi, Michael! Jeremy’s my Lil J, but you’re my Boi! I have something for you, yeah? How about this?”

Gavin makes a show of it since he had their undivided attention, and because he could without the worry of scaring them. With a flourish, he presents Michael with a small, blocky, golden sword. Michael pretends to not be impressed, but Gavin can see the awe and joy in Michael’s eyes.

“Gold swords are for chumps, Boi!”

Gavin pretends to be offended, all part of the games they all play with each other, “I don’t bloody shit diamonds, Michael! But if you get me some, I might be persuaded to give you an upgrade.”

“You can do that?!” Jeremy perks up from where he had been admiring his little Spyro, “You can make diamond swords?”

“Well,” Gavin hums, “I can make swords. I’m sure making one out of diamonds isn’t impossible, yeah? Just have to figure it out. We could make a day of it, lads! I could teach you how to be smithies, just like I used to in the 1800s!”

“I always forget how fucking old you are,” Michael shakes his head, “I mean, you talk about the 1800s like it was last fucking year.”

“I’m only 3000 years old or summat. That’s nothing compared to other Gods!”

“‘Only 3000,’” Michael mocked in a high, squeaky, British accent, ignoring Gavin’s whines to stop being a “smegpot.” Jeremy laughed in turn at Gavin’s pout, but not unkindly, “You old ass Greek fuck.”

“If you’re Greek,” Jeremy giggled, “Why the fuck are you British?”

“What? What do you mean, ‘why am I British?’”

Jeremy throws his hands up in the air, “You were born in Ancient Greece. You lived in Ancient Greece for a long fucking time. You’ve lived in the US for a few decades. So why the fuck did you decide to be British?”

“Because I lived in the British Isles for over a century, Jeremy! I came over with the Romans and never bloody well left! I’m probably more British than Greek anymore, yeah?”

“I don’t think that’s how that works.”

“That’s not how you work,” Gavin grumbles petulantly, earning him a snort from the two other Lads.

“So you’re fake British. What the fuck made you come to Los Santos of all places? I mean, you went from European shithole to American super shithole.”

Gavin stretches out on the white sectional that took up most of the Fakes’ living room, sun streaming in the floor to ceiling windows making his skin look more golden than it really was. Jeremy and Michael settle down similarly, the quiet music from their abandoned game the only other sound in the room as Gavin collected his thoughts.

“Now that’s a question, innit?” He finally says, leveling them with a lopsided smile, “You know I’m God of Gold, yeah?”

“Of course,” Jeremy instantly answers, to which Gavin hums.

“That’s not all I’m God of. Most gods have other domains as well, like Artemis being Goddess of the Hunt, but also of Childbirth. Or Apollo being God of Medicine as well as Music and Prophesy. I also have other domains.

“Akakios contacted me a few decades ago, about 40 years, really, and said he found a city that needed me. He had been living in the States for quite a while at that point, from the Northeast to the South to the Midwest. Everywhere, yeah? But he had never said that about any of the cities he visited. So, I knew he had to be serious to even consider that a city needed my help.”

Both Michael and Jeremy watch Gavin closely as Gavin turns to look out over the city through the windows. Eventually, when Gavin didn’t start up again, Michael piped up, “So what else are you God of that made it so you could help Los Santos?”

Gavin smiled softly, “I am Midas, God of Gold. Patron of the Poor and Protector of Outcasts. Wherever poverty and the downtrodden go, I’m needed. And Los Santos was full of it. Corruption was even worse than it is now. At least 80% of the population was below the poverty level. Almost 30% were homeless. Kios saw these people and knew I could help them somehow. So, I boarded the next flight from London and got to work.”

“Jesus,” Jeremy breathed, “You fixed Los Santos?”

“I still am, yeah? Until these people no longer pray to me, I’m needed.”

The three were quiet for a moment, as Gavin watched the sun dip lower in the sky out the windows, buildings glinting in the late afternoon sun like steel and glass gemstones. He still had so much work to do to get Los Santos to where he’d be happy leaving it. So many were still born into poverty. Too many homeless and alone. He did what he could, but he was one God against a society that didn’t care.

Gavin started when Michael finally spoke, the tone in his voice leaving no room for argument. Gavin knew that tone very well. Michael had made up his mind about something and wasn’t about to be swayed.

“So, what can we do to help clean up the shit?”

“I…what?”

“You heard me. How can the crew help? We have more money than sense anymore. And most of us grew up in lower-class dumps like Los Santos. Hell, Fiona was raised here. I’ve been on the streets, and it sucks major doo doo. So, how can we help you make this place a level above a turd?”

Gavin felt a swell of emotion for his Boi, that extended to Jeremy when he saw him nod in agreement. Both of them were watching him in rapt attention as if soldiers waiting on their orders. And Gavin…well, Gavin knew exactly what they could do. A grin curled on his lips as he pulled out his phone to call a crew meeting.

“Boys…I think we need a heist.”

A few weeks later, the news would tell a peculiar tale. Someone had broken into dozens of homes of wealthy Los Santos citizens, all in one night. Nothing was taken but the clothes in their closets, and the food in their cupboards.

Meanwhile, every legitimate shelter in Los Santos, homeless camps, and charities received an anonymous donation of clothes and food. The only note was emblazoned with a green duck and written in gold ink.

Enjoy your donations. Make sure they’re used. We’ll be watching over you.

Of course, this didn’t make the news. Stories of the lower class never did. But that was just fine for the culprits; they didn’t do it for the fame or the fortune. No, they did it for the people. The people of their city.

It took a while before the police caught on to what the crew was doing. Sure, they still hit banks, but the majority of the stolen notes would end up funding an after-school program for at-risk youth. Expensive items would go missing, only to end up at a charity auction for a women’s center. And those few good officers saw what the crew was trying to accomplish. For the first time, the Fakes had allies in the LSPD; not many, but it was a start.

And the crew themselves seemed to have a new spark. Excitement in the air when they all sat down to plan the next heist, with the next recipient of their Robin Hooding. Jack heisted for a Children’s Hospital and they ended up with a small green duck on the new mural for the playground at the hospital’s campus. Geoff bolstered local AA and addiction groups, giving them the resources they needed to reach more people. Jeremy and Michael worked together to create boxing and wrestling programs for low-income kids. Matt and Trevor created STEM programs. Fiona worked on LBGT programs. Lindsay was adamant about helping the animals of Los Santos.

They all had their niche. And, together, they did their best to make good in the city.

Gavin was overjoyed, to say the least. To see the people he cared about the most helping him make the city a better place was everything he had ever hoped for. He still got prayers daily, almost hourly, but they were coming less as people had more places to turn for help. Of course, he would always answer the call, if needed, but he could finally relax after 40 years of doing everything he could to raise the city from its rough beginnings.

And he started to see a shift in the people as well. They were helping each other, raising each other from where they had fallen. Injustice was being spoken out against. Marches were organized for victims of senseless violence. People were donating more of their time and money to helping those around them. Gang wars turned into alliances against corruption. Ballas and Vagos worked side-by-side on cleaning up the rec center that bordered their territories. The Families extended protection to those too weak to fight for themselves, with no payment needed. Even Madrazo’s Cartel could be seen handing out food and blankets to the homeless.

Something had changed. Something had shifted.

Maybe there was still hope for Los Santos after all.

#fake ah crew #my fic #fake ah jeremy #fake ah gavin #fake ah michael #midas gavin #fahc #ragehappy

[genius11rare]

AH ChitChat Notes 3 22 21

Chitchat 32221 with Jeremy , michael and matt ft disembodied voices of lindsay and maybe kaden , gus in chat and joins

Jeremy: Kaden spoke up because of donuts earlier… Michael: Jacks time is over now… but he will be on stream later. Jeremy: oh yeah schedule. Slight last minute changes doing Fall Guys first cuz S4 came out… me michael  lindsay and matt did a letsplay in it earlier today … gus will be doing fall guys this stream (eyyy)... oh yeah and i wanna impersonate what jack does. Matt: do it. Jeremy: and if you're watching on the site we can see your chat like FatHippoHippo wrote BET in all capitals … yeah i just wanted to get into the spirit and be like “what would jack do, what would he think is funny” and that was it. Lindsay: alsoone of those WWJD bracelets from the 90s What Would Jack Do… (matt: ive repurposed them) Jeremy: so how are you doing? Lindsay: good weekend i guess , just telling Matt we watched Big Hero 6 yesterday (Jeremy: aw hell yell) still an awesome movie , kids loved it. Jeremy: where they scared of - idk if he has a name the kabuki villain… *looking it up* apparently its Yokai… guess they never really say it cuz that's generic. Lindsay: that's VERY generic. Michael: IVE GOT TO TAKE THIS CALL *facecam becomes void* Jeremy: ok spoiler alert for Big Hero 6 but just looking at the wiki… it makes an audacious claim. It says “professor robert calahan OR ALSO BETTER KNOW as his villain name Yokai”... is it? Lindsay: well its based on a comic right so i guess canonically he has a name…. But to answer your question No they werent scared … anyway something we noticed upon rewatching is that 2 characters before a MAJOR event happens to the fistbump… but DON'T do the explosion… like oooohhh foreshadowing. Michael: not really foreshadowing if they keep doing it throughout the movie , if anything its foreshadowing that like… hell… whats the robots name - baymax learning it… not really foreshadowing the building explodes (gen notes MAJOR EVENT) … what blew my mind was that movie has a post credits scene. Jeremy: oh yeah was it like with the dudes father. Michael: Fred yeah! Remember remarking upon them entering the house theres a portrait of the dad and i just went “his dads just Stan Lee… just a portrait of him” Post credits scene and guys talking to painting and - wasn't paying attention but he like hits his head on it and the wall opens up to show a superhero room with paraphernalia everywhere and Stan Lee walks in like “son we got a lot to talk about” Jeremy: Chat asking about if i watched the wrestling PayPerView… remember how i updated you last that the guy died in the ring after being set on fire (Michael: lemme guess hes a zombie now) - yep exactly last night a hand reached up and grabbed someones leg , he came out of the smoke with a melted messed up mask so yeah…. Hes a furry (i think?) zombie clown Michael: hey wait a minute let me read the chat , someone named Gus said “whoa no idea there was a post credit scene”  “what is a fastfood restaurant combo wish would open” Lindsay: Miss my KenTaco Hutt… Michael: idk im usually just in the mood for SOMETHING , not looking to combine , only time is when i want a certain food and they don't have the same sides i want other places have . like Sonic is amazing for sides , apps and drinks… don't care for entrees , but if i could get Sonic sides at McDonalds or Taco bell or something.. Jeremy: guess in the same vein id combine Dairy Queen with a lot of places (Matt: i was about to say) to get a BLIZZARD with whatever. Matt: that's how it usually goes anyway , you get the food , you drive by the Dairy Queen and get a desert - you don't get the food at Dairy Queen cuz why - just why Lindsay: i mean theres icecream but there isnt really fastfood places for other deserts… like theres not really a Cake or Cupcake place (Matt: not yet *tilts head at camera like “you know what i want”* ) there IS the cupcake ATM Matt: alright checking the google… Michael: Matts checking the driving distance. Jeremy: another questions whil matts looking up cakes (Matt: oh i already have it) nevermind then. Conware asks “what is your fave controller for console and whats fave controller you own” Jeremy: Idk really… i know for a while everyones was the Elite 2 Michael: yeah just most comfortable. Matt: well that's like a specialty type… if its a stock one then the switch pro controller is pretty good. Michael: i mean i also have this 8Bit do SNES bluetooth controller thing , love it Lindsay: i love the nintendo switch controller grip… makes it feel like it curves comfy around your palms Jeremy: the XBOX sea of thieves one is great (Matt: i was about to say…) got a glow in the dark skull in the middle , RT is like a gold tooth , is partly see through Matt: and it comes with some exclusive stuff for Sea of Thieves Lindsay: yeah like Motion Sickness. Matt: i got one that's just a donut. Lindsay: gave me an idea… you know how theres Pez Dispensers (matt: heard of them) yeah and how you don't really even use them right you just eat the candy and play with the thing  ( *matt nods approvingly* yeah about right) what if we invent a controller where every once in a while it opens up to give a snack. (Matt: yeah like everytime you get an achievement, Jeremy: yeah i did good! Just go up to the controller and eat it) “You Are Good Boy” Matt: be funnier if it just throws at you “everyone have a fave seasons and followup do you like seasons where you grew up or where you are now?” Jeremy: i mean springs probably my fave its easy to be outside , not boiling hot nor snow everywhere… great time to camp and fish , falls cool with changing colors… texas is like “do you want REALLY hot or hot?”  Michael: i do really like Fall on the East Coast but its like - yeah i miss it and its nice to be there when it happens where its light jacket weather. I used to wear sweatshirts all the time - i don't bother with long sleeves in texas cuz i know im taking it off within 30 min…  never knew about the Water Cup thing until i lived in texas where restaurants just HAVE water cups… blew my mind its free  - because people will drop dead . noticed they just have this seperate stack of clear cups which is i guess like “i BETTER not see any soda in that cup THAT'S  A WATER CUP!”. I don't like it when its 105 degrees but i do like being able to just wear Tshirts most of the year and not dealing with snow Lindsay: i like Fall the most cuz like its blend of i guess i embrace the basic bitch stereo types of fall , want my pumpkin spice latee but ALSO i know halloween is coming and ive said before how THAT'S like my religious holiday so like… i come alive. Matt: probably fall , maybe winter. I don't go out much but fall is like the right amount of cool but not TOO cool. Jeremy: over the weekend me and kat went to a town called rockfort (i think?) which is like right on the ocean , the weather was a little cold for it , like 50 maybe and the sea breeze made it chillier… im not really a beach person just more water. You say beach and you think  like Boogie Boarding Bros (Michael: whoooaah boogie. Lindsay: beach volleyball) yeah .. id reather be on a rocky shore than a sandy beach. Michael: youd rather be like a mermaid sitting on the rocks *jeremy laughs loud* is that what you're saying Jeremy: yeah Matt: attracting sailors to their DOOM Lindsay: i gotta send you a link but theres this one TikTokker i guess that i watch that talks about that an eastern european beach she went to and was like “i cant wait to go on my beach outting yeah!” and she gets there its rocky , really windy , noones there and goes “ooh its really cold” Matt: depends the kind of beach to me… for me East Coast beaches SUCK *jeremy nods yep* its water you cant see anything in its terrible Lindsay: that's also texas beaches , all brown. Matt: its just one of those things where you get in the water and your like “ok… at anymoment i could be attacked by everything around me”  Michael: well that can happen on land too matt (Gen Notes WELCOHME TA JOISEY!!!) (paraphrasing jeremy here) Jeremy: theres this guy who flys a drone out over beaches into the ocean , and he released the footage… apparently due to there being a lot less people now theres just Great White Sharks that go relatively close to beaches now… there are times where hes filming people playing and like 10 ft away is a fucking shark ya know just swimming. And cuz they're really far away hed be like “id see it , film it , then go to a lifeguard and show it like “oh btw…” “ Michael: so you know 2 hours ago someone may have been eaten. MattL he should put a speaker on the drone to like announce the sharks like HEY! DEATH OUT THERE!. Lindsay: “whats that Dronie? Theres a shark in the water?!?” Jeremy: and it was funny seeing that behavior where everyonce and a while a shark would be swimming then someone would do something near it not seeing the shark and the shark just goes “fuck dat” and swims away MattL god dude…. So close to death *gus joins* Lindsay: oh you're the guy who was like Texas beaches have Tar Gus: oh yeah i grew up in texas and i thought all beaches were like that just “oh you don't sit on the tar”

#text #gen notes #ah #achievement hunter #chit chat #chitchat #march 2021 #michael jones #jeremy dooley #stream #live stream #notes #idk what else to tag #qna #for later

[newagesispage]

                                                                        MAY                 2021

The Rib Page

*****

George Takei is sweatin’ with the oldies. He stars in a fitness app for gay seniors, Bar Belles. It was his April Fool’s day joke.

*****

Fox will bring us Crime Scene Kitchen on May 26 with host Joel McHale.

*****

Joel Hodgson has launched a new kick starter to create a new independent season of MTS3K, The goal is $2mil.

*****

Bob Odenkirk will release: Comedy, comedy, comedy, drama: A Memoir on Jan. 18 2022

*****

Leslie Jones will host the 2021 MTV Awards.

*****

$3 mil was raised for Next for Autism with help from Conan, Kimmel, Charlize, Chris Rock, Jack Black and Sarah Silverman.

*****

Have ya noticed that Gayle King looks great in yellow.

*****

Some people are not too happy that Elon Musk will host SNL on May 8. Miley Cyrus is the musical guest.** Musk tweeted: Let’s find out just how live SNL really is. Cast member Bowen Yang tweeted back, : What the Fuck does this even mean?

*****

Oh Seth Meyers: Every time I see the sea captain on your show, I miss him so much!!

*****

There is a spotlight on Foxconn which made a big splash for Trump at the start of his presidency. The company has done a lot of nothing but still gets tax cuts. Homes were demolished, roads were widened to nowhere and money was spent. Wisconsinites are upset that this big business is just folly and a big glass orb.

*****

Mike Lindell is a kook but he did try to appear to be a good sport on Kimmel.

*****

When will weed be legal on a federal level? When will drug testing for employment be illegal? We hear so much about personal rights with the gun laws and vaccines and masks. What about the right to do what we want with our bodies when we are not at work. Think of the administrative costs that could be saved if we just removed drug testing. Our experience and work ethic should mean more that what we do with our free time. This is not a problem at all companies. There are places in this country where it is near impossible anywhere in your area to get hired without a drug screening. One joint on a random Saturday night could keep someone from a great opportunity. A person in pain who reaches for an edible might miss out on the job that saves their lives.

*****

NASA sent the first flight to another planet. The Mars flight made history with the 30 sec feat.

*****

What? The Menendez brothers are popular again? From the Ramsey case to the Manson murders or Bundy, it all comes back around again.

*****

The Lizzie Borden house just sold for $2mil to Lance Zaal of U. S. Ghost Adventures.

*****

Quarantine and so much television et al proves one thing, the pharmaceutical and insurance companies have way too much $.

*****

Trump told everyone to boycott Coke and is later seen drinking diet Coke.** Trump sent out a statement about how bad the Oscars are. They threw it right back in his face. ** Federal agents have searched Giuliani’s Manhattan apartment. It stems from the 2 year investigation into activities in Ukraine.

*****

X-VP Pence is said to have pressured the Navy to reinstate former Mo. Gov. Eric Greitens. Greitens was accused of tying up, blindfolding, taking explicit photos of and blackmailing a woman.

*****

There is a crisis in schools with the lack of civics and history being taught.

*****

Hulk Hogan was hit with a chorus of Boo’s at his latest event.

*****

The latest sexual harassment news: Matt Gaetz  is being looked into for sex with a minor and sex trafficking.  Bill Barr opened the investigation.** Tom Reed has been accused of sexual misconduct by former lobbyist, Nicolette Davis.** Marilyn Manson has been sued by Game of Thrones, Esme Bianco for sexual abuse.

*****

What is going on with Bank of America? I am hearing from multiple people that often they do not get their statement in the mail. Is this a bad Postal service? Is this bad business practice? How many late fees had to be paid because of this? Not everybody wants to pay their bills online.

*****

Jack Hanna has revealed that he has dementia.

*****

Tiny Tim : King for a day is a new doc I must see. The film contains footage shot from Warhol’s Factory. There are excerpts from Tim’s diary read by Weird Al Yankovic and the story of how Tiny’s friend, Bob Dylan wanted to make a film with him.

*****

Lindsay Lohan’s Father, Michael has been charged with 5 counts patient brokering and 1 count of attempted patient brokering. This is an apparent scam of steering addicts into rehab for cash.

*****

Aaron Sorkin and Paulina Porizkova are dating. Pete Davidson and Phoebe Dynevor are dating.

*****

JB Smoove has a new podcast brought to you by TeamCoco.

*****

Hey.. People working on the new Law and Order: Organized Crime….. TOO MUCH MELONI!!

*****

*****

Zach Avery, actor, was arrested for his participation in a $690 mil Ponzi scheme.

*****

President Biden has restored aid to the Palestinians.

*****

MLB put up a wall in Georgia but the Masters stayed.

*****

Hank Azaria has brought Brockmire to a new podcast.

*****

Tommy Chong isn’t allowed on FB because of his weed posts but they allow an imposter to use his name to sell weed.

Pennsylvania is trying to push thru 14 voter suppression bills.

*****

Joe Manchin. Ugh!!** Marjorie Taylor- Greene has let go of her America First caucus.** Ted Cruz has allegedly used $154, 000 of his campaign funds to buy up copies of his book to boost sales. This is an old trick but still illegal.

*****

For the first time, The Carter Center became involved in a U.S. election. They published videos and live webcasts as well as deploying observers across Georgia.

*****

Most health programs in Uganda, Nigeria and Ethiopia have resumed after Covid.** Tom Vilsack from the Dept. of Agriculture has announced the USDA will provide assistance to 30 million kids.** It is sad to me that we have to entice people to vaccinate. Football games, Church’s and shot for shot in bars?? Really? Saving the lives of others should be enough. WTF?

*****

Alec Baldwin, Alec Mapa and Kelsey Grammer are shopping around a new comedy that ABC decided to pass on.

*****

Chauvin was found guilty.

*****

Days alert: C’mon Ben, calm the fuck down! Don’t prove how out of control you are like everybody thinks. ** Xander is so funny right now.** How many people will Kristen be and how many times can one person melt down?? **Bring Carrie back!! **Jackee’ seemed a bit nervous in the beginning but she is fitting right in. More!

*****

The SAG awards came and went. With the Trial of the Chicago 7 winning best ensemble, Michael Keaton is the first person to be in 3 best casts for SAG’s.** Other winners include Viola Davis, Chadwick Boseman, Daniel Kaluuta, Youn Yuh-Jung, Mark Ruffalo, Anya Taylor- Joy, Jason Bateman, Catherine O’Hara, Schitt’s Creek and The Crown.

*****

The Oscars were held on April 25. It was a bit of a yawner and why would a show set themselves up for an awkward end?? There was a commercial from P&G right before the broadcast that stated, “ Widen the screen so we can widen our view.” Nice sentiment.  Mank had so many noms and only 2 wins. People looking their best to me were Leslie Odom Jr., Glenn Close, Riz Ahmed, LaKeith Stanfield, Colman Domingo, John Batiste, Mia Neal, Questlove (gold crocs and a mask!), Desmond Roe, Travon Free, Trish Summerville, Marlee Matlin, The Lucas Brothers, Andra Day, Carey Mulligan, Amanda Seyfried, Nicolette Robinson, Regina King and Margot Robbie. Laura Dern looked like Big Bird, there were just too many feathers. Tiara Thomas had feathers but they looked great.  Angela Bassett had some power sleeves and Tyer Perry looked like a little boy.  Hooray for Emerald Fennell for her win for original screenplay but not sure about the dress. And Viola Davis?? Dana Murray?? Ashley Fox?? Hmm?? Winners seemed to have trouble getting to the stage. They often refused the steps or the walkway and sort of climbed up the side. I did love the intimate setting and it did remind me of the old clips of years before. Sound of metal and Ma Rainey both won. Tyler Perry and for the first time, an organization, the motion picture and television fund, took home the humanitarian award. I was thrilled to see My Octopus Teacher win for Doc. I loved Crip Camp too, that was a hard category.  The acting winners went in all directions.  Many critics complained that the films were real downers . Nomadland won best picture. Michael Moore put it best I think. Of the films this year, he said, “They force you to look backward with 2021 eyes.”

*****

Why the Fuck do we need a militarized police force?

*****

R.I.P. victims of the multiple mass shootings, victims of police shootings, the crush in Israel, Cosette Brown, Midwin Charles, DMX, Paul Ritter, Ethel Gabriel, G. Gordon Liddy, Buddy Peppenschmidt,  Prince Philip, Anne Beatts, Diane Adler, Vartan Gregorian, Monte Hellman, Jim Steinman, Michael Collins, Michael wolf Snyder, Johnny Crawford, Eli Broad and Walter Mondale.

[achieveandhunt]

live typing extra life 2019

warning: this a fucking LONG post. if you plan on reading it all, godspeed.

i typed all of this as it was happening on stream so this gets progressively less coherent as i grow more sleep deprived. prepare yourselves. i may or may not go off topic at some points

larry vehemently vomiting pure malic acid. we’re off to a great start

what the fuck the soggy ass popcorn in that ranch jesus christ

lindsay in the song from AH the musical. i love her so much

jeremy going YAAAAAAY after someone eats a cursed oreo

matt getting AGGRESSIVELY kissed by larry

“this kiss this kiss” before geoff and jack kiss

geoff “i’m from alabama” ramsey

THIS FUCKING RANCH SEGMENT HAS ME GAGGING

jeremy “the alcohol demon the whiskey goblin” dooley

alfredo “you wont believe what the white people did today” diaz

DUSK BOYS DUSK BOYS DUSK BOYS GET THAT DICK ESSENCE

wait why does it sound like wonderwall

they look like characters from the matrix

the speaking parts. make my teeth hurt

in conclusion: they weren’t kidding abt the tight pants 

okay everyone get ready for eric soundboard spamming YEAH BABEY

“hi i’m from broadcast and i don’t want to be here” they represent themselves well

also, let’s take a second to appreciate broadcast here!! they have a really tough job and don’t get a ton of credit. lots of love to all of broadcast!!! you guys are awesome

i am: foreseeing problems with this eric sound board

which one is eric?? will the real eric please stand up?? was the real eric the one we found along the way??

“i’m... just really worried that i won’t ever find love-” “i really don’t care”

WHY DO THEY HAVE THAT ON THE SOUNDBOARD (what does that apply to? whatever it is you’re thinking of, but mostly “daddy wants some”)

ooh someone’s about to get a fReE tongue piercing from a pineapple

god dammit i went to the bathroom for thirty seconds and now they’re eating chad’s chest hair

owie the shock collar and belly slap look painful, but drinking natty light from a shoe? that’s a true punishment

“and this roast was brought to you by meundies”

ah yes what better way is there to end a segment than people throwing up

“man action” oh no

THROBERT MULVEINY

K A R B is blind in T W O of her eyes

“my last name is cottagecheese”

I HAVE A PIECE OF METAL SHOVED UP MY A S S 

chris has somehow managed to lose 23 years of age and roughly 412 pounds

“just open throat like baby bird” who the fuck is writing this and why is it jeremy

jon. jon you’re breathing in adam’s ass fumes

a summary of this segment: ass and cottage cheese

BARB IS HERE I REPEAT BARB IS HERE

“to fitness” -starts choking-

final fitness coach: tad, here to workout your issues so they can beat you into submission

“will you buy my wet” well i don’t see that on the raffle items

we’re back folks & i’m loving this walk around segment

moonball wall and gavin&michael will soon be reunited can we get an F in the chat

jeremy getting a borderlands tattoo is very on brand

what’s extra life without a little satan

“starvation army, putting lead back into paint, increasing childhood obesity” people in chat: TAKE MY MONEY

chris “i’m doing a different hole” demarais

ah yes. the game we all play in hell: twister

nobody edit chris getting mustard shot down his throat. i’m scarred enough from the original clip

oh fuck. oh god. the mayo. oh god what the fuck is up with the misuse of condiments this year

this just in: a human soul costs roughly $12,700

D̷̯͑̆̈́͝Õ̸̲͎̥̬͈̬̙͕̲G̸̢̧̠͉͚̙̲̙̓̔̀̇S̷̥̀́͆̈́̇̀ ̶̣̞̗͚̬̭̖̦͇̈́̎̈́̿̓̈́͆̒̋D̷̙̟̩̫͉̺̐̊̚Ö̶̥́̋́̓ͅĜ̵̞̌͋̏̉̌̕͝͝S̵̤̹̣̫̮̻͛̍̑̕͝͝ ̷̧̨̞̙̥̟̜͍̉̍̑̏̇̀̾D̴̻̮̩̯͓͉̖͎̘͐̒͋̓̉͝ͅỎ̶̰͓̳̥͑̅͛͊̒͐͊͘̚G̵̩̻̦̥̠̃̔Ş̶̹͚̩̱͖̀͆͘ ̸̢̢͇̻͔̗̺̼͖̱̏̾̔̚D̴̨̨̫̙̃̾̋̾̆̓̓Ớ̷̡͓͎͊G̶̱̣̣̰̝̖̰̗̓͐̐̊͋̀͊̀̕͝Ş̷̩̺̬̖͙̺̟͗̈́͒͗̀̑́́̕͠ ̷̡͈̼̲͈̳̫̺̝̈́̋͌͗̒ͅD̸̨̬̞̪̗̘̄̑͆̿̈́͘͠͝O̸̡̡͇͕̻͎͍͉̅̌͗̄͌̑̉̔͂̎Ḡ̸͙̟̪̞̬̬͕͐̈̏S̶̝̪̼̮̠̜̭̳͖̘̑

urine: to help with aerodynamics

jon: maya, speak! maya: *the smallest arwoo*

today’s mvp: any dog. pick one. no matter which you pick, you’re right

how the fuck did blaine change back from satan so quickly

barb as a cat is... my new sleep paralysis demon

blaine: barbara speak! barbara: climate change is real

#dogsforkids

this just in: extra life killed my wifi

we’re back & kdin is in the business of killing people with spice. she is the spice queen

queue six thousand well-timed 1337 donations

HOLY SHIT THAT’S COLIN FROM WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY

hmm “questionable liquids” is very... questionable

trevor: oh there’s four of them! we all get to join in the Fuckkkk

“what’s your favorite kind of candy” “any meat”

i like pickles and i would rather rip my eyebrows off than drink the juice so i feel for trevor

the only thing worse than drinking apple cider vinegar is shooting it out of your nose

“can you feel the love tonight” “i used to and that’s the problem”

“flubs every word man” damn, really missed the chance to say captain hair

jeremy not being able to intentionally flub his words is so fucking funny

OK BOOMER 

wow i can feel my blood pressure spike just watching these shots

Xavier Woods is here and he wants to know if it’s Christmas

miles doesn’t know what a question is

WHERE’S YOUR HAIR

oh no. oh no helping hands is next. everyone clear a splash zone

CHEF MIKE CHEF MIKE CHEF MIKE

miles bossing around chef mike is priceless

“you leave that fucking dough on the floor”

“you wanna slam your hands down on the table” *pizza sauce goes flying everywhere*

HOEDOWN HOEDOWN HOEDOWN jesus why do i keep doing that

“If Colin Mochrie is listening, I’ll see you here next year” OH FUCK YEAH

--- this is when i take a break so my soul can return to my body (aka i have work to turn in. college will never not be a pain in my ass) ---

oh god dammit i missed all of Always Open. fuck college who needs a medical degree

so... we have some very interesting things happening in family feud and i’m not sure if i like any of them

hmm. is now the time to get drunk

oily twist feels very... ominous

what do you mean you don’t remember gandalf having a taser in lord of the rings?

someone in the chat said “big stupid sleeping thing is what my parents called me in high school”

i think i’m blacking out what’s going on i don’t remember the past two hours

ah yes. voldemort and snape having a talk show together sounds exactly like something J.K. Rowling would make a spinoff book or show or porno of

can we just talk about how much shit chris has been doing this year? what a guy. what a dude

“coldy with voldy” actually means getting knocked the fuck out cold because you only got three hours of sleep last night and you don’t want to miss chef mike and lindsay cooking

this snape poem is summarized by one phrase: “that was terrible sit the fuck down” (sorry chris)

“let’s destroy a weasley” enter chad

fucking called it

“you smell poor” i need a caffeine drip

heh the wheel spins are at 69 heh nice

i’m a grown ass woman

welcome to a section called: we torture chad for your entertainment

“who wants us to kill weasley?” *massive cheers from the audience*

“wait weasley step away from the wideshot so i can masturbate to this later”

“i’m not gonna rub my eye mom”

oh they’re really gonna kill chad on stream huh

i felt that chest slap in my soul

i think i felt my own ribs crack

oh fucking

tumblr deleted my thoughts on the fanfic section

alright. fine. brief summary: my teeth are burning

my mom lindsay is on next and i’m so excited but i’m nearing the point of loopiness so things will go downhill dramatically from here

this is my fucking fourth extra life, you would think i’d be smart enough to sleep the night before

LINDSAY LINDSAY LINDSAY THAT’S MY MOM

JEREMY JEREMY JERE- wait a second... did jeremy get taller

oH CHEF MIKE CHEF MIKE CHEF MIKE

i hope Xavier comes back next year because he’s funny as fuck

m y a t t

oh god the mcdonald’s shade i’m rolling

lindsay “who’s the chef here” jones

chef mike mentioned mayo and i involuntarily gagged

chef mike clowning the big mac. i’m crying

he made the right choice with ryan bc i’ve seen his cooking stream(s) and it’s nothing if not great content

i heARD A MICHAEL JONES

“lindsay you haven’t done anything but warm up cookies so far” “yeah and?? you’re welcome”

you know that classic snack. slightly warm oreos

JEREMY THE LIQUOR GOBLIN DOOLEY IS BACK

oh god him screeching across set is making me cry laughing

why does it remind me of trevor’s voice cracks in the one minecraft ep where they’re singing the lion king

the biggest spoon for the smallest shot glass

i just realized we’re not even halfway through yet and i’m scared for the length of this list i’m gonna end up falling asleep involuntarily at some point

lindsay no your teeth are going to errode from that shot in your mouth

well timed leet donation #1829495

this gorden ramsey bit is so fucking good

jack: what do you think of the arugala? matt: i don’t even know what you said

iT’s NoT jUsT tWo CoOkIeS miCHeAL

jeremy and michael just chillin amidst the choas is exactly my demeanor at any party i’ve ever been to

lindsay scores: ryan = 7 because diet coke, matt = still eating lindsay’s meal so it’s a 10, xavier = also still eating it so it’s an 8. total: 25

“deep fry everything but a remote control”

chef mike scores: ryan = 9 for no death, matt = greens are present, words were said, score is 8. xavier = Gourmet Mcdonald’s, food is edible, score is 8. total: 25

oh fuck it’s a tie

now they fight to the death. death = doing as many shots as possible

i think we’re all going to need liver transplants after tonight

no jesus please don’t vomit oh goD oh fUc k please- oh thank god

okay i’m making a part two this is too much

#extra life 2019 #i’m going for full 24 hours this year #rooster teeth #achievement hunter #jeremy dooley #michael jones #lindsay jones #jack pattillo #geoff ramsey #gavin free #ryan haywood #matt bragg #alfredo diaz #trevor collins #fiona nova #i regret everything in my life that has led to this moment

[gamelpar]

It’s All About Fakes (100 sentence prompts fanfic)

Because I suck a writing even short stories or drabbles, I write 100 sentences prompts for the Fake AH Crew instead.

Some of them are inspired by moments in Let’s Play videos, headcanons, social media posts, or just comes straight out of the blue.

Feel free to take inspiration from the prompts or use them.

Prompts are written from a non-shippy perspective, but each prompt can be intercepted in whatever way pleases.

Also my first work, so let’s see how this goes.

Hey, why don’t you read it on AO3 instead?https://archiveofourown.org/works/24787825

1. How the Fake AH Crew got this far is a hell of story, and you can bet it’s one damn worth telling. (Fake it Til’ You Make it)

2. Ray was a sniper; he could spot bullshit a mile away, so how come he ended up in the Fake AH Crew? (On the Spot)

3. Sitting by the wheel of the red minivan Geoff sighed for the 67th time that day, still disbelieving the fact that they were not on their way to carry through a well-planned heist but rather enroute to the beach for some “splashing and slacking”, as Jack had called it. (Sunday Driving - To the Beach)

4. “The Vagabond says: it’s all gonna be murder.” (What the Vagabond Says)

5. Whether it was the Golden Boy or Gavin; Mogar or Michael; they wouldn’t leave each other behind. (Bois Forever)

6. Lindsay---being an absolute goddess as always---supports Jack in her telling for Fiona, and Jack couldn’t have been more grateful. (Women’s League)

7. Matt screws something up; Trevor is there to help him fix it; then Gavin and Alfredo is there to screw it up even more. (Nice Job Breaking It)

8. It’s Bake a Cake Day (according to Gavin) and it’s Gents vs. Lads (insisted by Gavin) and it will also be known as the day when Geoff’s kitchen met its undeniable demise (because of Gavin). (Bake a Cake Day)

9. Long story short: Michael breaks into an animal adoption center for a cat because Lindsay, and Gavin and Ray tags along because why the fuck not. (No Animal Came To Any Harm Except For Gavin)

10. A heavily tattooed man walks into a bar; later, a mad man and a lady in a Hawaii-shirt joins him. (It’s Not a Joke but the Punchline is Fluff)

11. Lindsay and Jeremy have dealt with shit going sideways longer than most people so they know how to make the best of it. (Failure is an Old Friend of Mine)

12. “I hereby announce that the official Prank Wars Week is in session!” (Oh No)

13. The Vagabond might be ready to die, but Ryan knows he’s not. (Ready as I’ll Ever Be)

14. The Lads---and Geoff---gets drunk as hell one night and starts a sock company. (Socks, There’s Socks Everywhere)

15. A boring Fake AH Crew means a dangerous Fake AH Crew and the residents of Los Santos better prepare for chaos. (Boredom Can be a Health Hazard)

16. Ryan gets hiccups and Ray thinks it’s funny until he gets hiccups, too, and soon everyone is stuck with hiccups and everyone blames Ray for some reason. (The Hiccup Disease)

17. When dawn arrives the Fake AH Crew will never be the same again. (Dawn After Battle)

18. Shopping weekends was nothing Lindsay used to do regularly, until Ryan one time decided to come along; then it became a thing. (Stuff We Do Together)

19. Even after leaving the crew, Ray would still have a home to return to. (Home is Wherever You Make it Be)

20. “No---we’re not twins, we’re not brothers, we’re not related in any way, so please for god’s sake, stop asking that.” (Stop the Questions Goddamnit)

21. Jeremy tried to apply more pressure to the wound but as the time on the bomb was running out, so did the blood. (A Mistake You Won’t Live to Learn From)

22. Someone knocks---no, pounds on the door to Ryan’s apartment at 3AM in the morning and Ryan’s still not that happy to being woken up in the middle of the night even if it is Meg waiting behind the door. (Late Night Visitor   or   Expect the Unexpected)

23. “Hey, guys, Fiona here---you’ll never believe this---but I’m stuck in jail and I need one of you to come and bail me out.” (Let’s Bail)

24. Matt is found alone sitting on top of the roof, watching the sunset, but what Geoff finds is someone who needs to talk and so he decides to be that other someone who listens. (Everyone Needs Someone Sometimes)

25. Gavin gets into trouble, which drags Michael and Jeremy into more trouble, and Geoff just wants to have a fucking drink. (Prepare for Trouble)

26. Gavin makes a statement, and Ryan feat. Alfredo makes it a hundred times worse. (Disturbance of Your Own Making)

27. Being welcomed by the sight of a bloodied and battered Gavin through the open door eliminates any tiredness and annoyance Geoff had worked up to having been woken up by a loud pounding on the door at 2AM. (Bloody Brit)

28. That was the way of the Battle Buddies; if one went down, the other had to keep on going, no matter what. (Broken Promise)

29. Nothing lasts forever, and Ray knows that better than anyone. (Never Say Forever)

30. The remaining Gents as well the rest of the Fakes would always be missing a part of themselves from now on. (Parts & Pieces   or   Next Step is to Move On)

31. The alphabet wasn’t enough to cover every brilliant plan the Fake AH Crew had in store, but they never settled for a single letter anyways. (Seven Ridiculous Plans and One That Actually Made Sense)

32. To the Lads, brighter days ahead is just an illusion they can only dream of in the aftermath of a heist gone wrong which claimed the lives of the Gents. (Miserable Lads)

33. It’s a story from being refused of coffee, to wanting to commit suicide briefly, to Trevor having made room for tea-parties with Jeremy, Gavin and Lindsay in his schedule every now and then. (Shut Up and Have Some Tea)

34. Really, it all started when Ray wouldn’t leave Geoff’s house one night. (A Place for Everyone)

35. Usually things doesn’t escalate this far by playing a simple Xbox-game but having ended up in jail, Michael and Matt doesn’t have much of a say about it and Geoff’s pissed. (Hate the Players)

36. Waking up in a dark room tied to a chair with no slightest idea of what the hell’s going on tends to lead to some anxiety-ridden experiences, especially when it is Gavin who finds himself in that situation. (Blackout)

37. No one wants to be the only sober one left to take care of a drunk crew, but with Ray gone Ryan just has to accept that this is his life now. (Trust   or   Sober One)

38. To think it all started that day when Jack saved a drunk man from being robbed in a dark alley. (Mind Your Manners)

39. Neither Lindsay or Michael would force Gavin to put on a brave face after a nightmare; everyone had fears and it was okay to be scared sometimes. (Sharing is Caring)

40. Matt’s life was just another pile of broken pieces until he met Jeremy, and suddenly he had some glue to put the pieces back together. (Glue   or   Glue My Life Back Together)

41. In the temporary apartment Ray was living in at the moment there was a vase by the kitchen window, always holding five red roses. (A Vase Full of Roses)

42. Geoff’s mood could easily be improved a 100 times better with some nice and warm socks. (Can Never Have Enough of Socks)

43. The crew quickly learned that pairing up Ryan and Trevor together would leave a traumatic amount of battered bodies and large pools of blood behind. (Madness In Me)

44. Michael’s life was like a puzzle; bits and pieces all over the place, some fitting, some not, some missing or broken, some didn’t even belong---and Jack standing there in the middle of it all being the only one who seemed to sense some kind of pattern. (Puzzles)

45. The Fake AH Crew weren’t good guys---they never would be---but that didn’t mean they were incapable of doing good, and they were by far the most decent team of criminals that had ever set foot in Los Santos. (Bad Guys Do Good)

46. Tears kept falling, slowly soaking the photo Jack held in her hand of her and the crew---not wanting to forget, yet not wanting to remember. (Remember to Forget)

47. The pink sniper rifle that hung on the wall would always serve as a reminder for the members of the Fake AH Crew that they were not immortal after all. (We Could Be Immortals)

48. Ryan’s an evil mastermind and that frightens Gavin a little, but the Golden Boy reckon it’s time to beat the Vagabond at his own game. (The Reckoning)

49. Kerry Shawcross crosses paths with the infamous Fake AH Crew completely by accident, and all hell breaks loose. (Welcome to Fake Hell)

50. The blood on his hands belonged to someone he knew---someone he cared about---and Ryan had never been more afraid of himself. (There’s Someone There But it’s Not Me)

51. It’s Pride Month and Jeremy really takes it up a notch when coloring his hair this time. (Rainbows)

52. Watching them Lindsay realized that while each of them all had lost so much, they had found even more. (Less is More)

53. Trevor would be better than Geoff ever’d been at scheduling heists and leading the crew, but he still gets to handle all the complaining from the crew so he isn’t as satisfied as he would like to be. (Point of No Return)

54. When the realization strikes him that he’s the only one left remaining, Jeremy falls to his knees in defeat and can’t stop screaming. (What Remains)

55. Fiona can never seem to stop messing with Gavin in any way possible. (A Step Too Far)

56. “Yeah, they’re all idiots---but they’re my idiots, so don’t you fucking dare lay your hand on them.” (A Bunch of Savage Animal Idiots)

57. Times have never been darker for the Gents as each of them struggles to cope with the deaths of the Lads in the aftermath of an coordinated attack. (Falling Inside the Black)

58. The day he met the Wildcard, Michael’s whole world finally started to make some sense. (Wild World)

59. Geoff’s constant drinking worried Gavin sometimes. (Drunk Concern)

60. Matt didn’t believe anyone would care enough for him to consider him family, nor did he believe he would end up in becoming a part of one. (Lost and Found)

61. Alfredo always wondered who Trevor really was underneath his iron suit of armor. (Armor)

62. Even when stuck in a seemingly never-ending coma, Geoff was never alone. (Not Alone)

63. Alfredo joins the Fake AH Crew with more blood on his hands than most people---including himself---would’ve expected. (Red Sea)

64. There’s a perfectly valid reason why Lindsay, despite not being his roommate anymore, is the only one who has a key to Ryan’s apartment. (Key to the Door)

65. Four times Jeremy and Trevor talked their way out of jail and one time they didn’t. (Another Approach to the Problem)

66. Lindsay tried, and that’s why she was still alive, even though everyone else that mattered to her weren’t anymore. (The Fake Among the True)

67. Fiona was her own knight in shining armor and no tower could ever hold her captive for long. (Green Knight)

68. There were days when Jeremy saw a way out, yet the light would always fade at the end of the tunnel, leaving him in the dark. (No Way In, No Way Out)

69. The others would never come back, and Gavin, walking in the wake of that horrifying truth, felt like an empty shell with nothing left to give. (Empty)

70. Trevor would give his life for the crew just like Geoff and Lindsay had. (Third Time Counts)

71. One time for when each of the Fake AH Crew members showed strength and one time when they didn’t. (No Shame)

72. Jack and Geoff shared a special responsibility for every member of the crew, and Michael was no exception. (Nightmare Terrors)

73. ‘Who’s the creepiest motherfucker?’ is a question rather avoided and unanswered. (Creep Contest)

74. All Michael felt now was a burning anger that refused to flicker and fade, and thirst for revenge than could never be quenched. (Road Rage)

75. The last time they all saw each other the city was burning, wounds were bleeding---figuratively and literally---and they never expected to see each other again. (One Last Time)

76. Jack liked to be up in the early, quiet mornings while everyone was still asleep, but she was seriously going to tackle Ryan into bed if she found out he was still awake at 5AM again. (Go the Fuck to Sleep)

77. He’d said he was going to visit, but Ray always pushed the promise further to its limits every time. (Liar Liar)

78. Five times a heist went to hell and one time when it actually didn’t. (Heisting Hell)

79. Not every backstory of the Fake AH Crew’s members is full of shattered dreams and points of no return. (Wanted)

80. Gavin missed home sometimes, but the Golden Boy didn’t. (Two Sides of a Coin)

81. Jeremy’s admiration of monster trucks stretches way back to when he was only a child, walking past a toy store. (Monster Car)

82. “You can leave if you want”, Geoff said, “No one’s going to stop you.” (Freedom)

83. The Vagabond was almost always in control after the Fall of the Fakes, mostly because Ryan let him. (Dead by Daylight)

84. Perhaps the next mishap won’t be so embarrassing for Alfredo, but life didn’t seem to like him much at all. (It’s Life, What Can You Do About It)

85. Four times Geoff said no to either Gavin, Ryan or Lindsay bringing an animal home, and one time he actually said yes. (Animal Addition)

86. So the members of the Fake AH Crew decides to steal their boss’ yacht again and Geoff’s as usual late to the party. (Yacht Party)

87. The crew goes to get some tattoos, and Lindsay is very sure of which one she wants to get. (Tattoos)

88. When Jack falls sick and can’t make her awesome lunch for the whole crew, the crew makes one for her instead (and Jack appreciates it even if it’s a little burned). (Faking the Chef)

89. The day Fiona joined the Fake AH Crew is a day Gavin will very well remember. (Bully)

90. The B-Team is usually there to clean up the messes, except for this time. (Don’t Leave Your Messes Here)

91. The whiskey burned his throat when he guzzled it, and Geoff wished that the liquor could burn away the pain and memories the same. (Burning Bridges)

92. The Fake AH Crew may look like they’re having the time of their lives, but the outside is designed to hide the struggles and issues that lingers underneath. (Inside Out)

93. With the Gents missing, the Lads stuck in a burning building, and the B-team cornered in a firefight, things does not look good. (Already Over)

94. The Fake AH Crew never failed to be impressed by Michael’s colorful vocabulary of swear words. (Words of Color)

95. Jeremy tries to cover up some traces of his past life from the rest of the crew; it does not go the way he wants. (Known to the World)

96. The Ring had been like home, but he wasn’t earning any money being beaten up every round in familiar surroundings, so Michael left---and ended up in Los Santos. (Ring of Fire)

97. The different paths that every member of the crew took for themselves led each of them to end up somewhere they never intended to be, but somewhere they were meant to be. (Pathfinders)

98. It was safe to say that every member of the Fake AH Crew had at least one weird obsession; some had way too many, and some obsessions were just what the fuck. (Obsessions)

99. The Fake AH Crew heists in style, or they do not heist at all. (Do it with Style)

100. The Fake AH Crew is made up of a selected (un)worthy and unique individuals---each one with their own story of whens, ifs, whats, whos, and hows. (Now That We’ve Come So Far)

#rtah fanfic #fahc #fanfic #more like weirdopath #my writing

[sorcererinthestars]

Okay but @shadeofazmeinya​ just posed a dnd au and I know a lot of other folks have too, but I’ve been now playing dnd for over a year consistently and I finally feel confident enough to truly throw my hat into the ring. I wanna hear your thoughts!! (Note: this is using the traditional 5e classes - I’m not getting deep into Xandars or any others, too much to focus on.) Note: None of you are going to believe me, but I didn’t set out on this quest to make everyone a different class. I was going to be totally fine with repeats. However, going through the list, it somewhat organically landed with people being different classes. Even at the end, what I was left with fit the characters surprisingly well. I’d really like to see what you have to say and if you think some of the boys&girls should share classes instead of it overlapping. Ryan: At first I was always going to say Ryan was a Warlock. He’s magical - in his character arc I feel he first would have started as a Wizard who has had the traditional training in the schools and then... something went wrong. He started meddling in what he shouldn’t have, started pushing the boundaries of right and wrong and summoning creatures he couldn’t. When he bites off something he can’t chew... well... he gets his magic from a deal struck with an extraplanar being. Too bad he can’t always control it. HOWEVER.... the new DnD 5e class, Artificer, is too perfect for Haywood to pass up. A mad scientist who “melds magic with technology, imbuing their inventions with a powerful arcane essence”? Truly the most Ryan of all DnD characters. TDLR: Artificer.

Gavin: I was influenced by Ranger for Gavin, but I can’t help but feel Bard is more fitting for him. Gavin - FAHC or not - is a man that gets people to do things through the sheer power of his Charisma. Just watch him manipulate the boys in any Between the Games! He’s a true master of the word. I picture him with a lute thrown over his shoulder, a brilliant smile on his face, ready to wrap you up with his pretty words and spit you out. Vicious Mockery? He’ll rip you apart with that tongue of his and you won’t know what hit you. TDLR: Bard.

Geoff: I see Geoff as a cleric, one that roams and tries to spread The Good Word while being able to get in there and break some skulls if needed. However, he’s not often liked - despite not being a Rogue himself, Geoff is a Cleric of the Trickery Domain.  Noted as a cleric who follows the god of “thieves, scoundrels, gamblers, rebels, and liberators”, he latches onto his fellow scoundrels and lets the Good Word lead him into some shit. Holding up a mace and a wild grin, Ramsey may be a Man of God, just don’t expect him to behave. TDLR: Cleric of the Trickery Domain. Jack: Jack’s really a no-brainer. I considered putting him as a Tempest Cleric, which is one of the subdomains, but he truly fits easily as a Druid. Almost a cleric of his own and a trickster in his own heart - which explains why he gets along so well with Geoff despite not quite sharing his faith - Jack is a true shapeshifter who can change into any animal he’d like (I see him favoring a tiger or other big cat). He’s also one with nature - a true craftsman and survivalist. Plants spring into life in his care, animals do whatever he asks, and woe betide those who make him mad. TDLR: Druid.

Michael: While Michael played a Paladin in Heroes and Halfwits, I don’t think that fits him. Paladins are more code-following than any of our lovely adventurers could ever hope to be, let’s not kid ourselves about that. In the end, I think Michael is a true-and-true Fighter, likely focusing on Protection. He’s a demon with the blade, aggressive and antagonistic, but will do whatever it takes to keep those he loves safe. But dear god to anyone who decides to get between him and something he decides is His to protect! He doesn’t need magic, nor want any - Michael is a man of simplicity, but that doesn’t mean he’s dull... his fury and finesse with a blade is entirely unmatched. TDLR: Fighter. Jeremy: Blood mage Jeremy was really something that caught my eye. I considered the idea of making Jeremy a rogue, but he’s too much of a Loud Boi to really be that sneaky. I see him instead as the Warlock Ryan was going to be. A man who dabbled too much with his magical knowledge, read too many forbidden books, that lead to an unholy union with some entity. Now he may aim somewhat necromantic, but Jeremy is a laughing soul who weighs lives like weights in his hands and who isn’t afraid to grin while blood is dripping down his hands. TDLR: Warlock.  And now for B-Team... Alfredo: Ranger. Alfredo’s always been a sneaky man, one who hovers on the background. It’s only natural that he’d be the shadow-walker, the man who hovers on the outskirts, ready to snipe an enemy with an arrow from a vast distance. He’s the man who can always find the path, a true survivalist who is an overwhelmingly amazing shot. TDLR: Ranger.  Lindsay: The mistress of Chaos herself, I see Lindsay as the Barbarian. Summoning up her battle rage, nothing will stop her from defending those who matter to her. Her fighting prowess is sheer strength and power and her rages have turned the tide of a battle more than once. Pushing up her shirt sleeves and entering into battle, they know no one has a chance. Truly, I don’t see many other races as quite embodying the sheer CHAOS of the Mistress Jones (except, perhaps, the Madness Cleric). TDLR: Barbarian.  Fiona: Full of mischief, I see our lovely Fiona as the Rogue of the party. Except, I see her more as the Swashbuckler subclass instead of a stereotypical rogue. Instead of lurking too much in the shadows, her tongue is her truest defense. She relies, as the book says, on “speed, elegance, and charm in equal parts”. Sauntering around with a rapier in her hand and a grin on her face, Fiona will steal both your heart and your wallet in one interaction. TDLR: Swashbuckler. Trevor: Trevor’s our traditionalist Wizard. He’s a smart, smart boy, leading AH the way he does, and it’s not a far leap for me to think that he would have studied magic almost feverishly to figure out how to become the most powerful. This boy was an engineer, for crying out loud, and in the DnD world he likely would have put the same furver into learning spells. An extremely powerful magician, Trevor can beguile you and harm you in the same breath. TDLR: Wizard.  Matt: While I think Matt fits the new Artificer class similar to Ryan, I can see Matt as a Monk. Matt is a man who is peaceful unless engaged. He’s more or less willing to do his own thing unless the others torment him. But when they do, watch out - he’s an intimidating man in his own right with the charisma and brains to dismantle an enemy. Matt would walk the Way of Shadow, which is a Monk class that allows him to cast spells such as darkness, pass without trace, etc. He’s a man that doesn’t necessarily want to engage, but if you press his buttons, he’ll come back at you ten-fold with a fury. TDLR: Monk. I’d love to hear what you have to say. I don’t think I’ve missed anyone from the main crew, but if you have anyone you’d like to add to this, please do. As I said before, I didn’t mean to make them all different, it just sort of happened that way! 

#achievement hunter #ah #dnd #dnd 5e #classes for the boys #let me know what you think #dnd au

[ghosthuntershane]

I have a lot of thoughts about the AH musical and I just need to write them down somewhere so if you haven’t seen it and don’t want spoilers, don’t read this.

First off, the fact that it’s disguised as a Jack Bag makes me really happy because I’ve been rewatching all the Jack Bags and Geoff Bags lately and I want so much more of these. I just really miss Cunning Stunts and Transform Races and I need more of these. 

Trevor calling Geoff “boy” just kills me. Like, not even a minute in the video and I’m already dead! 

Lindsay’s “Have you seen my new steam name?” is really funny to me ‘cause they’re all naming games and she’s just here like “yeah I don’t care I’m just being me.” 

Ryan: “What’s the last game Lindsay won?” And I didn’t realize that the first time but Lindsay just goes “hey” after that. 

I absolutely love Geoff’s “Everybody, SHUT THE FUCK UP.” 

Ryan just singing All By Myself all alone in first place. Even while filming the musical they can’t help but sing random songs. 

Ryan: “Who’s in first? Oh me.” Fucking smug piece of shit.

Ryan: “I’m somewhat in the air.” 

Also, can we just talk about how Ryan’s song just highlights how fucking deep and smooth his voice is. 

I so wasn’t expecting Lindsay and Fiona to show up behind Ryan in the office but it’s amazing! 

“He’s back there exerting all over my back end” sounds so fucking bad. 

It took me too long to figure out who was behind Michael in his song! Also, did they glue that wig on Jeremy’s head because there’s no way he can headbang like that and not have the wig fly off his head. 

Gavin just left Michael hanging for so long after after his “Team” and the way Michael just laughs and says “I hate you so much!” is just so cute to me! 

Were Alfredo and Trevor always called Team Same Face because I never heard that and that’s really funny to me? I always just called them the twins. 

Jack really just went and wrote a fucking love song for Geoff and him! 

“Who would have thought that after all these years our love could finally be shown in public, in a song, on the internet.” That is so fucking gay! 

The hug at the end of Geoff and Jack’s song and then they just walk away hand in hand! When I say Jackeoff revival, that’s what I mean! 

Long before the song even starts the dusk boys go in full dusk mode and it’s everything. 

Also, did Alfredo call Gavin a “cute idiot”?! Alfredo please!

The dusk boys song is such a boy band song and the video is even more! The fucking outfits, who do I have to thank for those!? Also, Trevor is such a good singer! Like, I’ve heard him sing before but never like that!

“According to wikipedia” alright, that killed me. 

The support room even got a song and it’s the best thing ever! 

Who the fuck would have expected Matt to sing like that!? He’s got a surprisingly good voice!

Jack asks Lindsay what she’s in and she just goes “I’m in baby!” 

Lindsay’s song is just as badass as she is. The whole damn thing is just a power move. 

There’s so many good lines in that song but my favorites have to be “Michael, shut the fuck up and make me a sandwich!” and “Light it up motherfuck, now your mother is me!” 

And she just fucking end it with a cute “Ah, thanks guys. Bye!” How?!

THE FUCKING FAHC SONG! LIKE I JUST SAW JEREMY SHOW UP IN FULL RIMMY TIM GET UP AND I ALMOST SCREAMED! I JUST STOPPED THE VIDEO AND STARED AT MY SCREEN WITH BOTH HANDS ON MY HEAD!

Like, it’s FAHC so I can’t not like it but it sounds so good too! It literally sounds like a song I’d just find randomly and like just because of how it sounds! I really hope there’s a way to download those songs at some point because I need this one!

The fucking little Garboman in Lindsay’s arms in the shot in with the police car and Gavin getting mugged at the end! 

It’s just so clear that Jeremy knows what we want and he just went and gave it to us right there. He said that he went on Tumblr and inspired himself of what we write and draw about the FAHC for this song and it’s just so fucking clear! I just love him so much for that. 

#achievement hunter #AH the musical #sorry for the incoherence of this I'm like all over the place and I just had to watch it again to write this #I just didn't want to forget anything and it made me realize that there's so much more that I love about it than I thought

[basicshadowhuntersstuff]

This week in Shadowhunters news, updates, sneak peeks, and behind the scenes. All the stuff you need to stay up to date.

Official Promotion

Maia saying what we're all thinking. #Shadowhunters 

FreeformTV tweeted: Just leaving this here. via @ShadowhuntersTV.

Awkward prom posing during #Shadowhunters Season 2 Episode 10.  #FBF 

When #Parabatai meet. #Shadowhunters 

Clary's face at the end. 😏 #Shadowhunters

What's your favorite Maia moment? #Shadowhunters

Luke has always been selfless. #Shadowhunters 

Hey handsome. Behind the scenes of #Shadowhunters Season 3B. [4]

Shadowhunters In The News

Clevver (article): Dom Sherwood Blown Away by Fan Support, Despite End of Shadowhunters

TeenVogue (article):  "Shadowhunters" Star Dominic Sherwood Has "Hope" for the Series Thanks to Fan Support   

Seventeen (interview):  'Shadowhunters' Star Katherine McNamara Shares Her Most Embarrassing Stories [2]

ComicBook.com (article):  'Shadowhunters' Star Reflects on Fan Support After Cancellation

ShumDario News (interview): Our Crazy Rich Asians Review with Harry Shum Jr. on Representation and Small Victories

Observatório Cinema (article):  Shadowhunters | Ator sentiu “esperança” por conta do apoio dos fãs após cancelamento da série 

Courier Mail (interview):  Shadowhunters star Dominic Sherwood goes bar-hopping in Brisbane

SpoilerTV (poll):  The SpoilerTV Favourite TV Series Competition 2018 - Winner and Final Words

SyFy Wire (article): 66 Bisexual+ Characters in Genre TV

The Series Regulars (article): ‘Shadowhunters’: Magnus Bane’s Positive & Powerful Bisexual Representation

TVFanatic (article):  31 Couples Who Accidentally Fell In Love

Just Jared Jr. (article): This Is The One Thing That Dominic Sherwood Wanted To Change About Jace in 'Shadowhunters'

GLAAD (article):  why we, the stans, love shadowhunters

PRIDE (article): 9 TV Shows with Bisexual Guy Characters

Twitter & Social Media Stuff

Sydney Meyer (Helen Blackthorn) shared a photo of herself as Helen:  Half and half 😉  [3]

Jack Wall (composer) tweeted:  Just finished the 42nd spotting session for our show Shadowhunters on Freeform that Trevor Morris and myself have been scoring for the last 2 years. An emotional series Finale and an emotional goodbye. Thanks so much...

Darren Swimmer (showrunner) tweeted:  If the previous 40 episodes are any indication, the score for the finale 2-parter is sure to be amazing.

Todd Slavkin (showrunner) shared a photo:  Last music spot with ⁦@DSwim⁩ ⁦@lonewolflindsay⁩ ⁦@jackwallmusic⁩ where we went over score, songs & sound fx for finale #sonicheroes #superears #thankyoulindsayandjack #shadowhunters

Lindsay Wolfington (music supervisor) tweeted:  Bittersweet final music spot with these guys. Can’t wait for you to hear! And yes, I teared up. #Shadowhunters #Shadowhuntersmusic

Jade Hassoune (Meliorn) shared a photo of himself as Meliorn on Instagram.

Kat (Clary) shared her Seventeen interview:  Thank you @seventeen for putting me through the 🔥 of the emoji challenge! Really made me 🤔 and 🤣. All my ❤ ! Check out the 🔗 for the full 📽! https://youtu.be/zUBD0xNDzLI

Isaiah (Luke) shared a photo on Instagram:  Who wore it better? #losersclub

Javier Munoz (Lorenzo Rey) shared a quick make-up trailer video:  Missing you peeps... #BTS Hair & Make-Up post shooting.... @ShadowhuntersTV @NicolaNCD @HarryShumJr @EmeraudeToubia @PrinceRoyce @Kat_McNamara @BriBriGuy23

Wevents Production announced David Castro (Raphael Santiago) and Nicola Correia-Damude (Maryse Lightwood) as guests for The Hunters of Shadow 3 in Paris.

Matt (Alec) tweeted his costars accomplishments:  If you don't know already, @Kat_McNamara is heading over to @CW_Arrow, @isaiahmustafa is crushing #IT2, @HarryShumJr is in @CrazyRichMovie and more, @WainwrightAE is in #raisingdion. More updates from the rest of the cast coming soon! Send them your support and love!

Sydney Meyer (Helen Blackthorn) tweeted:  Proud baby sister. Arrow is lucky to have you. Give em hell 👊🏹😉👏🙌❤

Wevents Production announced Will Tudor (Sebastian Verlac/Jonathan Morgenstern) as a guest for The Hunters of Shadow 3 in Paris.

Nuno DeSalles (cast trainer) shared a photo of Matt (Alec) on Instagram:  #motivationmonday !!! The #infamous #midworkout expression!! @matthewdaddario psyching himself up for the rest of the #workout Thank you again to @ac3_photos For another great shot!

Harry (Magnus) tweeted an animal request:  @MatthewDaddario yo, hit us with another Koala pic and maybe a kangaroo too.

Harry (Magnus) shared a video of a tour of his “backyard” via a new app.

Taylor Mallory (writer) tweeted:  When your Discover Weekly playlist tries to make you cry...  @jamiegorenberg @EmeraudeToubia #Shadowhunters #3x08   

Brian Hui (makeup artist) tweeted:  Super excited to be the new makeup HOD on S4 of The Expanse! Don’t worry SH fans, you’ll still get BTS of 3B but I hope some of you will join me in outer space! #TheExpanseSeason4

People’s Choice Awards

Shadowhunters is a finalist in three People’s Choice Awards categories, #TheSciFiFantasyShow, #TheBingeworthyShow, and #TheShow. Kat McNamara (Clary) is a finalist for #TheFemaleTVStar and Harry Shum Jr. is a finalist for #TheMaleTVStar.

Voting on the People’s Choice Awards website can be done here.

ShadowhuntersTV posted on Twitter and Instagram:  

We’ve. Been. Nominated. Retweet to vote #Shadowhunters as #TheScifiFantasyShow in the #PCAs.

We sure can. Retweet to cast your vote for #Shadowhunters as #TheScifiFantasyShow in the #PCAs.

You and your #parabatai can help us win as #TheScifiFantasyShow. Retweet to vote for #Shadowhunters in the #PCAs.

@Kat.McNamara is a finalist for @PeoplesChoice Awards #TheFemaleTVStar of 2018! Vote now, link in bio. You can vote up to 25x per day. #PCAs

There’s no shortage of magic in #Shadowhunters. RT to vote for us as #TheSciFiFantasyShow in the #PCAs.

We’re a finalist in the @peopleschoice awards. RT to vote #Shadowhunters as #TheShow in the #PCAs.

He’s wonderful both on and off screen. RT to vote for @HarryShumJr as #TheMaleTVStar in the #PCAs. #HarryShumJr

Somebody hug us. We’re a finalist in the @peopleschoice awards. RT to vote #Shadowhunters as #TheBingeworthyShow in the #PCAs.

And so are all of you. RT to vote for #Shadowhunters as #TheBingeworthyShow in the #PCAs.

We made it to the finals. RT to vote for #Shadowhunters as #TheSciFiFantasyShow in the #PCAs.

Vote for #HarryShumJr as the @peopleschoice’s #TheMaleTVStar? Challenge accepted. RT to vote for him in the #PCAs.

People’s Choice Awards tweeted:

Vote for Shadowhunters by retweeting this post: #Shadowhunters #TheShow #PCAs

Vote for Shadowhunters by retweeting this post: #Shadowhunters #TheBingeworthyShow #PCAs

Vote for Shadowhunters by retweeting this post: #ShadowHunters #TheScifiFantasyShow #PCAs

Vote for Katherine McNamara from Shadowhunters by retweeting this post: #KatherineMcNamara #TheFemaleTVStar #PCAs

Vote for Harry Shum Jr. from Shadowhunters by retweeting this post: #HarryShumJr #TheMaleTVStar #PCAs

 Harry Shum Jr. ✔ Champagne ✔ #Shadowhunters Nominations ✔✔✔ #PCAs

In The News

TVLine (article): People's Choice Awards 2018: Grey's, Shadowhunters Lead TV Nominations

Just Jared Jr. (article): 'Shadowhunters' Earns Five People's Choice Award Nominations - See The Full List Here!

Matt Carter (article):  Shadowhunters gains ground at People’s Choice Awards; what it means

Hidden Remote (article): Shadowhunters nominated for 5 People’s Choice Awards (and 4 of them were write-ins)!

Nerds and Beyond (article):  Sci-Fi/Fantasy Finalists for People’s Choice Awards

Billboard (article): 2018 E! People's Choice Awards Finalists Announced: See the Full List

E!News (article): 2018 People's Choice Awards: Complete List of Finalists

TVFanatic (article):  People's Choice Awards 2018: Grey's Anatomy, Shadowhunters Lead the Way

PureFandom (article): People’s Choice Awards: ‘Shadowhunters’ fans won’t back down

Kathie Lee and Hoda (video):  Exciting news! We just announced additional @peopleschoice award nominations! Get in on this second phase of voting! Voting is open now through Friday.

E!News (interview):  He wasn't an original #PCAs nominee, but #Shadowhunters fans are no joke!

E!News (article):  Harry Shum Jr. Pops Champagne Over Shadowhunters' Unprecedented PCAs Write-In Votes

Cast and Crew Reactions:

Kat (Clary) tweeted her thanks and voting instructions for each category!

Kat (Clary) posted about her nomination on Instagram.

Harry (Magnus) tweeted his thanks and voting instructions for the PCAs.

Harry (Magnus) shared a video thanking fans for the nominations encouraging voting on Instagram.

Todd Slavkin (showrunner) tweeted: The people have spoken! Congrats ⁦@Kat_McNamara⁩ on your much deserved PCA nomination. Your talent & dedication & positivity are an inspiration to us all #ClaryFairchild #girlppwer #shadowhunterslegacy #shadowhunters

Todd Slavkin (showrunner) tweeted: Of the people and for the people! Congrats ⁦@HarryShumJr⁩ on your PCA nomination. Your talent knows no bounds. There is nothing you can't do #magnusbane #rolemodel #Shadowhunterslegacy #Shadowhunters

Darren Swimmer (showrunner) tweeted:  It's an honor to have been able to work with #PCA finalists, @Kat_McNamara and @HarryShumJr, and I am incredibly glad their amazing talent is being recognized by those who matter most - the audience.

Matt (Alec) tweeted his support:  Hey! @Kat_McNamara and @HarryShumJr are nominated for #PeoplesChoiceAwards! Go to their pages and vote for them. Its the smartest choice you'll ever make.

Harry (Magnus) tweeted:  My reaction this morning looking at my phone.😲😆  

Kat (Clary) tweeted: Amazing work, angels! If you want vote, make sure you use all three hashtags! There are many posts for Shadowhunters, Harry and me that only have 2#s - you need to hashtag the name too for it to count - like this -  #KatherineMcNamara #TheFemaleTVStar #PCAs    1 RT = 1 vote

Oz Comic Con

Matthew Daddario (Alec) and Dom Sherwood (Jace) spent a weekend in Brisbane, Australia at Oz Comic Con.

The entire panel can be seen on the Oz Comic Con Facebook Page.

Clare Kramer shared a number of photos from the weekend’s panels:

Here’s @MatthewDaddario on the @OzComicCon main stage! #Shadowhunters #OzComicCon18

Here’s @DomSherwood1 smoldering at a fan @OzComicCon.  #OzComicCon18 #Shadowhunters

.@MatthewDaddario and @DomSherwood1 are cracking up the #Shadowhunters panel audience with their stories of mean magpies, eyepatches, and swimming kangaroos. #OzComicCon18

Deep thoughts with #Shadowhunters @MatthewDaddario: Why do they call them action figures? @DomSherwood1: Because you can make them do actions. #OzComicCon18 @OzComicCon

.@DomSherwood1 “You broke the sword.” @MatthewDaddario “I did not break the sword! The ground and the manufacturer conspired to break the sword!” #Shadowhunters #OzComicCon18

“This is what happens. I ramble, then he rambles, and people lose interest.” @DomSherwood1 on his #Shadowhunters panel with @MatthewDaddario #OzComicCon18 [1]

It’s time for the #Shadowhunters panel with @DomSherwood1 and @MatthewDaddario @OzComicCon, and it’s a packed house! #OzComicCon18

Here’s @DomSherwood1 telling the crowd @OzComicCon that @MatthewDaddario doesn’t like pandas. #Shadowhunters #OzComicCon18

SPOILER ALERT @MatthewDaddario @DomSherwood1 #Shadowhunters #OzComicCon18

It’s time for the #Shadowhunters panel with @DomSherwood1 and @MatthewDaddario @OzComicCon, and it’s a packed house! #OzComicCon18

“Matt had a lot of sugar before coming out.” @DomSherwood1 on @MatthewDaddario @OzComicCon #OzComicCon18 #Shadowhunters

Here’s @MatthewDaddario’s profile @OzComicCon, all chiseled and whatnot. #shadowhunters #OzComicCon18

#SaveShadowhunters (continued)

On June 4th, it was announced that Freeform wouldn’t be continuing on with a fourth season of Shadowhunters. Here are a few major highlights. (Our full roundup for #SaveShadowhunters can be found here.)

Amazon Adviser (article): Is it time for Amazon to save Shadowhunters?

Other News

Kat (Clary) will be joining the cast of Arrow in a recurring role for Season 7:

TVLine (article):  Arrow Season 7: Shadowhunters' Katherine McNamara Joins Cast

Kat tweeted:  THRILLED to finally be able to share this news. So excited to be joining @CW_Arrow!  Thanks @tvline

Hidden Remote (article):  Arrow Season 7: Shadowhunter’s Katherine McNamara joins the cast

The Series Regulars (article): Katherine McNamara Nabs Recurring Role On ‘Arrow’

TV Guide (article): Stop Everything! Kat McNamara Just Booked Her First Post-Shadowhunters Role

Just Jared Jr. (article):  Katherine McNamara Joins 'Arrow' Season 7!

Entertainment Weekly (article):  Arrow casts Shadowhunters star Katherine McNamara in recurring role

ComicBook.com (article):  'Shadowhunters' Star Katherine McNamara Cast in Major 'Arrow' Role

Screen Rant (article):  Arrow Season 7 Casts Shadowhunters Alum In 'Pivotal' Role

Digital Spy (article):  Shadowhunters star Katherine McNamara lands a crucial role in Arrow season 7

Matt Carter (article):  Shadowhunters star Katherine McNamara reacts to Arrow season 7 casting

Kat shared a thank you video:  Thank you, Angels! My heart is so full from all the love for #Arrow and #ShadowhuntersLegacy. SO many exciting things in store on all fronts.  @ShadowhuntersTV @CW_Arrow

Glitter Magazine tweets their congratulations:  Congrats to #Shadowhunters' @Kat_McNamara as She Joins Cast of Arrow

Elle (video and article): Activists, Designers and Actors Share Their First Time Voting featuring Kat (Clary)

#shadowhunters #bss news roundup #saveshadowhunters #peoples choice awards #oz comic con