#i still have trouble reaching out to people because in my mind the worst thing that could happen (they dont want to talk) is devestating

[cumikering]

Neighbour Ghost x reader 6

2.7k | angst No matter how loyal, guard dogs still have their teeth (part 1)

Simon’s steps to your door were heavy, as his heart had been since that call.

Despite his blazing wrath, he was unprepared for the waves of guilt that washed over, the shame that wrestled to drown him. He was unable to protect you from his past – he brought it upon you, even after how much too sweet you’d been, how softly you’d touched him. How could he ever look you in the eye again?

The stray never deserved any of that.

When you gave him a squeeze at the door, he didn’t return it. Still, you tugged him in with the same lovely smile, even when it wasn’t as wide.

“Fancy a cuppa?”

“No.”

Your pretty hand shouldn’t be in his filthy one. Do you even know what I do with these hands?

You sat at the dining table and Simon remained on his feet to your side, eyes fixed on the cup of pu erh before you. His fists clenched and released. You didn’t like pu erh.

At the end of the day, he was still a reaper in dress uniform - one with an unrelenting demon that lurked in the far corner. He could have fucked him up that evening at the bakery. Feel his nose crumble against his knuckles, maybe even the snap of his scrawny neck in his hands.

But no, this happened because he didn't. Like his mum said, you were good for him, of course you were. But was he for you? He was nothing but trouble.

You smiled up at him. Always so sincere, so delicate, making his stomach twist more.

“My dad’s visiting this weekend. I was wondering if you wanted to meet him? And… Um, what I should introduce you-“

Not addicted, he'd tell himself too many times, as if it didn’t sound like a bloody lie to his own ears. You were the beginning of an incurable addiction, a cliff with the bewitching view he was a step away from falling off of.

His gaze left you. “I’m going back home with my mum tomorrow.”

“Oh,” you said, your disappointment evident. “Okay, maybe next time then.”

His heart pounded in his ears as he forced the words out, nails digging into his palms. “We should stop this.”

“What… What are you saying, Simon?”

“This. Meeting you, staying over. I’ll have less time when I become captain. This isn’t going to end well,” he reasoned, but it sounded more like he was convincing himself this was the right thing.

He knew it was, even when it didn’t feel like it, like a lot of things in life. He knew one day he’d be glad he did this. One day, even when right then it felt like the worst thing he could be doing. Would someone, something, rip this decision away from his hands?

“You don't get to say that yet, not right now. I know you're going through a lot.” You reached for his hand. “But we can wait until things settle and we’ll talk-“

He pulled away from your touch. “I've made up my mind. I never meant for things to get this far.”

In the still room, his stare remained on the cup you hadn’t touched since his arrival.

“You knew this all along and you still let it happen,” you said as realisation dawned.

He looked up to meet your hardened gaze. He’d seen you sad, annoyed, angry, but this was the first time your eyes were devoid of warmth. Being the receiving end of that stare was a stab to his chest.

“I should believe people when they show me who they are.” You chuckled humourlessly. “Get out, Simon.”

The world slowed. It was hard to draw his breath as he remained unmoving, like he was chained to the floor of where his sanctuary once was. Despite the arms that ached to wrap around you and never let go, he forced himself to walk away as his blood ran cold.

The door slammed behind him. He didn’t expect a positive response, of course, but it was definitely not the shatter of his own heart.

Still, it didn’t hurt as much as it would have had he waited until you inevitably left him for one reason or another. At least he’d never have to worry about being like his dad, about hurting you, betraying you, if you weren’t there to begin with. Like he’d always known, you deserved better, someone as lovely as you – unlike this stray who would never be enough.

It’s the right thing.

He could give his mum his undivided attention now. She would never leave nor kick him out the door. If he was not wanted, he had to be endlessly needed, used dry until he was nothing but a ghost.

“Who the fuck broke my bloody door!”

Simon and his mum had been waiting for his dad’s return to the house that had turned into a complete mess. Meanwhile, she’d packed as much of her belongings as she could, her luggage in the living room.

“Sign the bloody papers before I make sure you never can anymore,” Simon barked, standing tall next to his sitting mum.

His dad rounded the corner and Simon’s jaw ticked thinking of what he did to you. He let out a weak sigh at the sight of his wife and son at the dining table, a sight he hadn’t seen in over a decade. His eyes softened.

“I don’t want anything from you, James. Please sign them and we’ll be out of here.”

He pulled out the chair across the table and propped his elbows up, face in his hands as he took a deep breath.

“I need to apologise, Melanie,” he began. “I’ve made your life hell, and I know there’s nothing I can do to change that now. I was my fault.”

“She didn’t ask,” Simon said through gritted teeth. He shoved the papers closer when he ached to break the filthy table with his dad’s skull.

“I’m sorry about your last night here. It was unforgiveable, what I did.”

Simon slammed his fist onto the table. He had watched the grand performance too many times. “You’re not fooling anybody with your tricks. Sign the bloody papers. I swear this is the last time I’m asking.”

His mum patted his hand, and he reluctantly took the seat next to her.

“I want you to have the house, Mel. You’ve always kept it too beautiful for a man like me. It’s the least I can give you after everything.” He let out a steady breath, flipping open the document. “I hope one day you can find it in your heart to forgive me for how much I’ve hurt you,” he added quietly.

Was that remorse that settled in his hollow eyes?

His mum bit her lip as a tear slipped. When Simon wrapped an arm around her, she sobbed into his chest.

No words were exchanged as his dad went through the papers, and it remained so until Simon wheeled his mum’s luggage out the door behind her.

“Goodbye, James.” She didn’t spare him another look.

“Simon?” he called in a small voice. “I’m sorry I’m not the father you deserve.”

The lieutenant threw the door shut.

Simon spent the next few days with his mum, Tommy, his wife and son. Since his last visit, Tommy’s got a new job and seemed to be spoiling his son rotten with plenty of new toys, including the shiny red bike outside. Unfortunately, even after over a year, he and Beth still hadn’t had much luck trying for a second child.

Joseph was a brilliant kid with a toothy smile, just like Tommy was, and it always surprised Simon how big his nephew got between each visit. It was a shame he only got to meet his family twice or thrice each year.

“Joe, you’ve been sitting on your uncle’s shoulders all day,” Beth said with an amused smile. “Give him a break.”

“It’s the best seat ever!” His little arms wrapped tighter around Simon’s head, eyes glued onto the cartoon on the telly.

“You need to do your homework.”

“I’ll do it here.” He poked the top of Simon’s head.

He laughed. “I don’t mind.”

She shook her head. “Come on now. Dinner will be ready in an hour. You don’t want to be late.”

“Okay…” he huffed before dragging his feet to his room.

While he flicked through the channels,  Beth went back to the kitchen where his mum was. He wasn’t one to watch the telly apart from football, but his thumb hovered over the button when the Great British Bake Off came on.

He remembered the episode. He’d watched it with you, the only person he ever watched the show with. It was yours, like a secret only the both of you knew.

It’s the right thing.

Faintly, his mum chuckled at something her daughter-in-law said, and his mind couldn’t help but drift to all the times it was you and her in his flat instead. Sharing stories, laughing, while he smiled at the sight from afar.

It’s the right thing, Riley, I promise.

He turned the telly off and went for a walk instead.

At dinner, the table admired little Joe’s drawings he’d done at school – he always saved them for when his daddy came home. With his precious family beaming, it seemed like the life Simon should have had, the one he always imagined was supposed to be like. But even without the devil trailing behind like an ellipsis, this, somehow, didn’t feel right either.

Despite his smile, his chest was heavy with the rotting carcass of the heart he didn't know he still had until weeks ago.

It’s the right thing, it’s the right thing, it’s the right thing.

Later that night, Simon’s head tilted when he entered the guestroom his mum occupied.

“Have you not packed yet? We’re leaving tomorrow. I’ve still got training on Monday.”

On the bed, she lowered her book and frowned. “I’m not leaving. Manchester is my home, Si.”

“Home is where you’re safe, mum, and you’re not here.”

She sighed, the sympathetic kind, before putting her book away. “My well-being and happiness aren’t your responsibility.”

He scoffed. “‘course they are.”

“I can’t thank you enough for thinking about me, but what’s happened, happened. I’m trying to start over, and that includes not being a baggage to you.”

He blinked. “Mum, what are you on about?” he asked carefully as he sat next to her.

“You need to live your life. You push good things away, Si.”

What… “I don’t. You’re all I’ve got.”

“Always so stubborn.” She shook her head. “Don’t make the same mistake I did, Si. My first love… Your granddad didn’t want us together, and I ended up with your dad. I grew to love him, but it wasn’t what I wanted. I chose easy over real. Sometimes I wonder if I’d been less afraid, what life would be like now.

“I'm by no means regretful, because I got to have my two perfect sons, but you had to pay for my mistakes too, and for that I’m yet to forgive myself. I’m supposed to give you a good life, but I didn't. The least I can do now is not hold you back.

Her hands clasped over his. “So live for me, Si. Don't worry about me. Wherever you go, whatever you do, I will always be your mum. I can’t stop loving you even if I tried. I just need to see you happy, that’s all I need from you.”

His gaze dropped to the ground. “I’m not good enough for her,” he muttered.

“That’s not for you to decide.”

“Isn't it too late?”

“Never.”

“You make it sound so easy.”

“You make it sound harder than it is.” She cupped his cheek. “It won’t be painless, but if she’s the one, it will be worth it.”

Against his mum’s shoulder, he wished his tears would stop flowing, but with the way she rubbed his back, Simon was once more just a little blond boy with the scraped knee.

From the front porch in the chill night, it was shameless how he called you at that hour, when he didn’t even say goodbye when he left. It was shameless how even after you rejected his calls, he still called for the 5th time, or 10th – he’d lost count. But at last, the line connected.

“Luv,” he said breathlessly, palm pressing against his eyes that had barely dried.

“Please stop calling me.”

“No, wait. Please, listen. Don’t-”

“You’ve made up your mind. Begging only reduces me to nothing, so I didn’t try to change it. I owe you nothing, Simon.”

And the line clicked off.

Still sat on the steps, he blinked at the phone in his hand, deciding if he was going to worsen the situation if he called again. It was shameless that he did anyway, but it went straight to voicemail.

Simon might not have had plenty of dating experience, it was shameless really, but he knew he still had a chance if you were mad.

You’d listen when he showed up at your door, still hauling his backpack.

“Luv, please. Please, listen.”

He thought his heart was about to explode when your footsteps approached. The door opened halfway.

“Hi,” you said, not meeting his eyes.

His breath hitched, and he was near to tears. Despite his resolve, he couldn’t get the words out.

“I've thought about it. You're right. I thought I knew what I was getting into, but it was always so hard to see you leave, and I realised it’s only going to get harder.”

No, no, no...

“Thank you for being honest and saving us from further heartache. I know I didn’t have to block you, but I hope you understand my decision to not be in contact anymore.”

“Luv, no. I wanted- I want to try. I don’t care how hard it gets.“

“I care. I want stability, maybe even a family, and I see now we’re not heading in the same direction.” You looked up at him with glassy eyes and a pained smile. “I wish you all the wonderful things, Simon. Truly, I'm so thankful I got to know you.”

He barely made out the words tumbling out of your lips, wishing he was hallucinating.

“Goodnight, Simon,” you whispered as you closed the door.

Even then, you didn’t give him a foul look for his audacity to show his face after biting the hand that fed him. It was the last time you were going to see him, why did you still have to treat him with respect?

He wished you’d have said something mean, even sick. You should have called him names, tell him he was the most ungrateful man there was, that he was just like his dad, so he had something to hate, so the fire could flare up high once more and he’d be safe behind it like he always was.

But it was you. You could stab him in the chest, and he wasn’t sure it would have been enough to hate you. To overwrite how wonderful you’d been to the wounded stray.

His gaze cast down, unmoving at your door. He did this to himself. It was his fault for dropping his cold stare, for smiling, for looking when you weren’t, cracking his jokes, touching your hand and kissing you, for lying down and baring his belly. It wasn’t your fault you didn’t want him anymore after what he’d done.

If he closed his eyes, he could still see the vivid curve of your lips, your soft laugh, the caress of your fingers. The ache for you morphed into an itch that made him want to claw at his skin, to replace the sweetness with bright, searing pain.

Would you please do the humane thing and shoot him so he didn’t have to drown in the storm that brewed in him?

It was for the best, he told himself. It was what he wanted after all, to keep his problems away from you, to keep you happy, even when he wasn’t in the picture. Leaving you was his repayment for being a thankless beast.

“Just because I go, doesn’t mean my heart follows,” he whispered.

@tiredmetalenthusiast @shadofireshinobi @keegansshark @two-gh0sts @eve-lie @lyenera @luvecarson @jaguarthecat @knight4xmas @unwrittenletter @mxtokko @reaperxxxxzz @footyandformula @opalesquegirl @audisive @sparrowgalaxy @fanficreblogs @strawberrystargal @damalseer @onlineoutcast

#call of duty #cod #cod fanfic #cod x reader #call of duty x reader #call of duty angst #cod angst #call of duty x you #cod x you #female reader #simon riley #simon ghost riley #ghost cod #ghost x reader #ghost x you #simon riley x reader #simon riley x you #simon ghost riley x you #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley fluff #ghost fluff #neighbor!ghost

[thesweetnessofspring]

Do you think Katniss and Peeta have biased opinions of each other?

Yes / No? Why?

Could you give example?

How did Peeta's hijacking affect their views of each other?

Disclaimer : these questions are for textual analysis, it’s not meant to incite fandom war.

Thank you :)

@curiousnonny

Hi nonny! This has taken me some time because I wanted to think on this for a bit. Tldr; their opinion of the other hinges a lot on how they think the other views them.

When Katniss thinks that she was just a random Seam kid Peeta helped once, she can't help but feel he's too good, too pure for Panem. When Peeta only knows Katniss from afar thinking she doesn't pay attention to him, she has an "effect" on people she doesn't herself perceive. When Katniss thinks Peeta views her as his competition, she believes him duplicitous and suspicious. And so it shifts based on whether they believe the other is actually in love with them, or if they're distant, or if they're friends.

The hijacking is definitely really tragic and this rocks how they view one another more than anything else. Obviously Peeta at first views Katniss as a mutt created by the Capitol. Once he's gone through some treatment, his views are still negative and that she's in the very least manipulative, his feelings and relationship to her bring a lot of confusion (did you love me? did you like kissing me? did you like kissing Gale? what happened on the train? are you my friend, lover, my target, or a mutt?).

Here's the thing with Peeta: he will not for the life of him admit when he needs to be cared for. He is the classic "I will take care of you, but don't worry about taking care of me, I'm fine." But underneath that, he just wants love, he wants someone to show him that he is loveable because he fears he isn't. And this personality trait doesn't disappear when he's hijacked. It is his very nature. But in seeing Katniss from a different light, in both his hijacked memories or her and the real ones clouded by the tracker jacker venom, he's broken to the point where he can't find it in him to love anyone (maybe other than Delly) because the memories have reinforced to him that his worst fear is true: he is unlovable. He gave his heart and was used and betrayed in return, never valued by anyone--not Katniss, not Haymitch, not Finnick.

In that anger, though, he is still reaching out for, yearning for Katniss to answer him. To explain everything to him. And I think a large part of him expects her to confirm she'd only used him the whole time. That his perception of her being a girl who enjoyed toying with him and Gale was true. But deeper underneath that layer of resentment, that part of Peeta that always sees the good and hopes, is searching for the reassurance: no, I love you. You are loveable.

When Peeta references the fact that the memory of Darius and Lavinia's torture wasn't "shiny" as well as the nights on the train that weren't touched by the Capitol, we're given to believe that he might have started to sort through some things on his own. And after Haymitch shakes up Katniss, she nicks a tiny crack in offering him a piece of himself back: his favorite color. Then seeing himself in his hijacked state really wakes him up to how far gone he is, how his perception cannot be trusted anymore.

This is I think where it really starts to turn back for Peeta. If he can't trust his mind, then his opinion of Katniss is wrong. So he has to learn about her all over again. And what does he learn? That she won't let him die. Not when he asks for it, over and over. Not when he first proposes it, not after more discussion, not when he's in the middle of his hijacking episode and she kisses him, puts herself in harms way again, to keep him with her.

The trouble is, Katniss has done this before during both Games, refusing to let Peeta be the one to die. So Peeta doesn't know if he is loveable, or if Katniss is simply that good and brave and strong to not let him go. That opinion he offered her about going to kill Snow, reminding her of the effect she can have...he sees now why she became the Mockingjay, why people followed her. And when he believes that she loves Gale, how can he see her sacrifices for him as anything but noble? If he is broken and worthless but she fights for him anyway, then she must be the hope Panem needs in that dark moment.

As for Katniss, well, we have access to her thoughts and some feelings. And she meets Peeta where he's at in challenging her. When he attacks her, calls her a mutt, something she never thought possible, she sees getting him back as impossible. She mourns him as if he were dead, because their relationship has changed so much she can't see it recovering, as she can't see him recovering.

She does get bits of hope, like Finnick and Annie's wedding cake, but when he comes at her with hostility, she sees that right back at him. It takes Haymitch reminding her who Peeta was, what he would have done for her, that brings her back to him. No longer is she meeting Peeta where he is in his hijacked state. Instead, she is remembering who he was, how he loved her, and tries to see him as he would have seen her in the same state. Through everyone helping out with his recovery, she finally gets glimpses into the true Peeta, the one she loves. Remembering her favorite color is green. That she loved the lamb stew. Giving others encouraging compliments. That he promised to always stay with her.

And after he had been conditioned to kill her, the fact that he saved her life as he always used to--that gave Katniss the belief and the hope that her Peeta, her dandelion in the spring, had truly come back to her, if she would only wait for his return. And then, he did.

#curiousnonny #the hunger games #everlark #katniss everdeen #peeta mellark #mockingjay #hijacked!peeta

[sserpente]

Let’s talk about Loki | S2 Episode 2! 😍

*takes a deep breath* HEAVY SPOILERS FOR EPISODE 2 OF LOKI!

Is it just me or is it hot in here? Not just me? Oh, good. I mean, honestly… that shadow scene was fan service. And trust me when I say that this will continue to make appearances in my future Imagines. Good gods… that suit and those green glowing eyes? Um, yes, please?! 🥵

Well… and on that note—you don’t mess with Loki. I told you X5 or Braaad (you got to say his name like you’re drunk) was gonna be trouble. Still hate him. He’s the type of douchebag who has no purpose when being bad. Blergh. He deserved Loki’s mischief. Also, can we please talk about how Loki was towering over him? That dark, purry and slow voice?! It would have worked on me… or I would have pounced on him and kissed him senseless… one of the two. Probably both at the same time.

Now I can also, finally, say what I’ve been meaning to say since last week but I couldn’t because of spoilers—I am so FREAKING MAD at Sylvie! Look… I know that in her mind, it was Loki who messed up. She thought he was gonna help her kill He Who Remains and he didn’t. Okay, fair enough. But it baffles me how she seems to think that Loki screwed things up when she was the literal cause of all this chaos and the one who kissed him and then dumped him through a time door. Literally and figuratively.

The fact that she thinks she’s happy… working at a McDonald’s on a branched timeline in the 80s… please. She finally has freedom and she’s doing this out of spite but this isn’t the life she truly wants, we all know that. I think she’s overwhelmed and she doesn’t know what to do with her feelings now that she’s killed He Who Remains. It didn’t give her the type of satisfaction that she wanted and if you think about it, she made it her life mission to bring down the TVA. Now that that’s done, more or less (she did realise after all that all those branches mean the TVA won’t go away properly) she’s a bit clueless and it shows. She’s gonna have to come around of course eventually… I mean, plot and story progression, after all, buuuut still—she’s gonna have to make up big time if she wants me to forgive her. She hurt him. That’s practically unforgivable. And on that note, I know there are Sylki shippers here reading this but every time I see these two together, they give me sibling energy. Soooorry, I can’t help it! 😂

So now the branched timelines are gone—for now, leaving only the Sacred Timeline, more or less—for now. There’s gonna be new branches again, of course. Something came to my mind the second time I watched it today though… didn’t they say in Season 1 that once a timeline reaches the red line, it can no longer be controlled by the TVA? Did I miss something here, was that a lie made up by He Who Remains so they’d take care of branched timelines as soon as possible? Because if it was true then how did they prune those timelines? Almost all of them were way past the red line! Or maybe this will have different types of consequences later on? Who knows!

That key lime pie tastes as good as it looks, by the way. So let’s talk about Loki’s and Mobius’ conversation while they were having a slice. I already read a few comments today and saw that a lot of people were missing the fact that Loki failed to mention that he was mind-controlled by Thanos when he attacked New York. I agree—it could have been thematised more but then again… I still think it was. Hear me out:

We know that the sceptre was influencing Loki—but not in the way he was using it to influence others. The sceptre/mind stone brought out the worst of Loki’s emotions and intensified them—in this case, his anger at his father and his brother (which he mentioned) and which is what Thanos used to manipulate him, promising him the “throne of Midgard” etc. It was a slippery bargain of course, because The Other was watching Loki and making sure he upheld his end of this bargain, or else Thanos would kill him. After all, why did he strike a bargain with that purple grape in the first place? He was hurled through space when he fell from the Bifrost. Remember? “I remember you tossing me into an abyss, I who was and should be king!”

So… yes, Loki was manipulated and mind-controlled by Thanos, we already knew that, of course, and personally, I think it’s still so traumatising for him to think, let alone talk about it that he would rather focus on his anger that caused all of this. If Loki was the honourable hero character (who we don’t need him to be anyways) he probably would have let Thanos kill him no matter what he offered. Maybe he wouldn’t have talked his way out of it with a bargain that meant the cost of many innocent lives. Instead, he let his anger drive him and Thanos used that to his advantage. That’s my ten pence on it!

From now on, I’m as in the dark as you guys. No clue what’s gonna happen in Episode 3 but I reckon we’re gonna meet Renslayer again. Let’s give her a good slap in the face when we do, shall we?

#loki #tom hiddleston #loki season 2 #loki series 2 #loki spoilers #loki season 2 spoilers

[redisforhappy]

shigaraki x kidnapped reader

tw// unhealthy relationships, possessive tomura, mentions of abuse

He doesn't like when you cry, but he doesn't like it when you get too confident either. If you're confident, you're stupid. Stupidity will wind you up in a "bad situation," most likely with your body tied up on the floor and him standing over you, scolding you for trying to run or attack him.

Of course, after a month of you here with him he's gotten a lot more lenient and patient with you through your efforts of pushing you away. He still wouldn't be too opposed to killing you if you did something unforgiveable, but he feels like it was be such a waste of what you two of brewed here together already. He's never felt so close to somebody, and the thrill of having your life in his hands thrills him. Keeps him occupied while the new members of the League of Villains drive him absolutely crazy.

"Stop," Tomura seethes as you reach for the doorknob. Admittedly, sometimes your outbursts of defiance are completely his fault. When he gets too bored or annoyed with the others, he says and/or does mean things to you for his own enjoyment, to remind himself he's still got complete control over somebody. That isn't fair to you so he understands your hate for him at times like this. "If you walk out that door you'll be in trouble. Just come sit down."

Your hand shakes around the knob, internally debating whether you should listen to him and retreat or do what your mind is always screaming for you to do; run. Just run. Squeeze past the others and through the bar door, into the open streets, and run through traffic to escape this crazy boy. Worst case, you get hit by a car and die. What would be the damage? Every day you live in this house with him brings you a day closer to death anyway, seeing as he can get pretty dodgy when he's angry.

And maybe there are times when you enjoy his company and feel grateful that this kidnapping experience hasn't left you fully traumatized or injured. When you're mixing drinks for him behind the bar and he's talking to you about his favourite video game, and you're silent. But you're listening.

None of it is worth it if this is how you have to live out your relationship. If he were captured, maybe things would be different. Or if you were both heroes, fighting crime together. Returning home to your suburban house afterward and drinking together. Laughing and whatnot. But that's not Tomura. Tomura is a villain who doesn't know how to love, nothing more. You're his pitiful victim with Stockholm syndrome.

In the time you spent thinking, Tomura had walked over to you and placed his palms on your shoulders coaxingly. You want to punch him.

"Don't touch me Tomura. I want to go home."

"This is your home. We made this deal," he slurred, narrowing his eyes and glaring at the side of your head. To see your face head on would be to sabotage himself. If he can see your tears he is that much more likely to give you what you want. If he releases you, you'll never return here. He'll never see you again.

The problem of your escape has never been what you might tell people about him. In the case that you do run and find your way back to your people, tell them all about how horrible he was to you, he will only make a bigger name for himself. If it did anything at all, it would only benefit him. He probably should let you go just for that, seeing as the League hasn't been getting too much attention since the debut and downfall of the Hero Killer.

But that would mean he wouldn't have you anymore. Nobody else will do.

"I want to call the deal off," you reply sharply, "I can't. I can't stand you. You're not what I.. You're not who I want. I'm a hero, not a villain."

"You told me you liked me."

"Before you kidnapped me! Every night I sleep on the floor next to your bed with my wrists bound by a belt! You are constantly teasing me, I'm not allowed to talk to Dabi anymore because you're so fucking insecure. Frankly, I don't want Dabi! I don't want any of you! I want my house and my cat, and my best friends. Being stuck here with you is the worst thing that's ever happened to me."

Your words have him still, but his fingers grip into your shoulders like claw clamps. The nails of his index fingers bare into the flesh of your neck just slightly. You've never been so rude to him before. He's utterly taken aback, and he's not happy about that. You called him insecure, jabbing into his skull stronger than a blade could. How dare you call him insecure!

Before he can make any more movements to throw you to the ground, you swiftly open the door and rip from his grasp to make a bee line for the door. Tomura calls for Kurogiri to stop you, but he's too slow to grab so he vanishes to locate you as fog instead. Dabi sits on the couch watching it all happen with a smug look on his face.

"About time she did something."

"I'm going to tear you apart if you say anything right now Dabi."

But he knows Kurogiri will get you and bring you back. He will. Right?

#tomura x you #tomura shigaraki #shigaraki x reader #angst #unhealthy relationships #bnha #league of villains #dabi #possessive shigaraki #feeling moody #Spotify

[shadow-says-hello]

Is The Hawkeye Ticklish?

Summary: Kate wonders if her friend and favorite Avenger Clint is ticklish, but tickling him also lands her in some trouble!!!

This is my first time writing for Marvel so please be nice!!! 💕🐉 My writing hasn’t been the best lately but that’s alright

Switch!Clint & Switch!Kate

Kate and Clint have come pretty close, especially after Kate met his family and they bonded over archery. The two loved each others’ company and they loved doing things together. Kate was over at Clint’s house while his family was out for a bit. Lucky was there too.

Kate and Clint were playing with and petting Lucky. The retriever rolled over, inviting Kate to give him a belly rub.

“You like that, don’t you?” Clint said, smiling at the cute dog, also reaching down to pet his tummy.

“Ooh, he loves it! Look at that happy little puppy smile!!!” Kate chuckled.

Lucky yipped and rolled as the two archers pet him, making it look like he was laughing. Kate had forgotten tickling existed because she hadn’t been tickled for years, but the topic suddenly rushed back into her head.

“I think the puppy is ticklish!” Kate beamed, shaping her hands into a claw and tickling the dog instead of rubbing it. “Which makes me want to ask, are you ticklish, Clint?”

Clint laughed a little. “I don’t know, and I don’t want you to find out.”

But Clint did know, he just didn’t want to tell Kate because she would be annoying if he openly told her he was ticklish. Clint knew where he was ticklish too, his family and Natasha tickled him a lot.

“But it will be fun! I want to know if the official Hawkeye is ticklish!!! Besides, you don’t laugh much, so this will definitely get you giggling!!!” Kate kept a bright smile on her face at the thought that she would tickle Clint to pieces.

“Let’s not.”

“But I just wanna knowww!!!”

“No.”

“Yes!”

“No.”

“Stop saying that, Clint!!! You’re obviously too shy to be tickled which makes me think that you’re really ticklish!”

“…but I’m not ticklish…” Clint kept his cool, not letting his face go red.

Kate walked her fingers up his side, squeezing his upper ribs. Clint let out a small yelp and jerked away.

“Oh-ho, I knew the Hawkeye was ticklish”

“Kate, no…”

“Kate, yes!!!” The black haired girl swung her other hand over and rapidly squeezed Clint’s other side, making him squirm and laugh.

“Kahahate! Fihihine! Ihi guehess I’m tihicklish! Buhut you’ll nehever fihind my weheak spohots”

“Is that an invitation for me to find your tickle spots!? Please, this is going to be a piece of cake! I can do whatever I set my mind to”

Kate began to poke around Clint’s belly, making his laugh raise a few octaves, but he still wasn’t quite dying of laughter.

Kate finally moved up to his armpits, a common tickle spot on most people, and Clint lost it. He slammed his arms down and laughed uncontrollably.

“KAHATE STOHOHOP!!!!!” Clint screeched, eyes watering a bit.

“Alright, but I’ll have to remember this!” Kate removed her hands from Clint’s ticklish armpits.

“You are a monster” He said.

“A tickle monster” Kate teased. Clint rolled his eyes and ruffled her hair. A cute and funny moment until…

“You have 3 seconds to run” Kate’s face dropped from a smile to a look of terror.

“3”

“Wait Clint, nonono”

“2”

“CLINT!”

“I’d start running if I were you”

“Yeah but I’m not ticklish”

“Bullshit, your time is up, uh oh”

“Oh god Clint no no wahahait-“

Clint dragged Kate down so she was laying flat on her back, Clint was straddling her waist.

“Oi! You’re so heavy” Kate grunted.

“I don’t care” Clint said, shoving his hands into Kate’s armpits, just like she did to him. Kate screamed.

“CLIHIHIHINT NOHOHO!”

“You started this!!!” Clint scribbled along her belly, then started squeezing her sides, then squeezing her ribs, then her hips, thighs…

Her hips might’ve been her worst spot. The rapid squeezes made her loose it, and to make things worse, Clint pinned her arms above her head so she couldn’t stop anything, and then he squeezed her armpits rapidly which sent her into hysterics.

“CLIHIHIHINT IHI CAHANT BREHEHEATHE!!!” She squealed.

“You’re being a bit dramatic, don’t you think?” Clint asked teasingly.

“WHYHY YOU SOHO GOOD AT THIHIS!!!?”

“I have kids! I do this all the time to them! You know something else I do a lot, something I especially do to Nathaniel, that he loves?” Clint asked.

“WHAHAT!!!???” Kate screeched.

“I do this a lot” Clint pulled Kate’s top up slightly and rested it at the top of her midriff, blowing huge raspberries on her tummy and nuzzling his face in with every one.

Kate let out a deadly scream, it all tickled so badly, and the noise added to it. Kate kicked her legs and squirmed as much as she could, but it wasn’t stopping. Clint even grabbed her hips to center her in place so she wouldn’t move around anymore.

After about several more raspberries, Kate’s laugh fizzled into silent and snorty laughter, signaling Clint to stop.

“You snort too?” Clint giggled a bit, pulling Kate’s shirt down and gently patting her tummy.

“Sh-shuhut u-uhup” Kate breathed heavily.

Tickle fights happened a lot more after that day.

<3 The end! 💕🐉

#tickle community #tickling #tickle #ehe #marvel #mcu #kate bishop #clint barton #marvel tickle #switch!kate #switch!clint #and i want to be in that situation #raspberry tickles

[jinx-on-mars-19xx]

The Lost Prince

⚔️ All Previous Parts Here ⚔️

Dom x Colson (Yungblud x Machine Gun Kelly)

Warnings: ABO (knots, slick, mpreg), Viking Col, fae Dom, shifting, wolf form, plot chapter, mentions of piss kink, mentions of sex, light voyeurism (but not really), PTSD, mentions of being held captive, secrets revealed, mentions of past war, nervous boys ☠️ rating: mature ☠️ shared ideas by @iamnotanearthlingmotherfucker 🖤

Kol'son didn't know how long they laid on the forest floor. They were filthy and tired and eventually he slipped himself free to curl around three-fourths of his pack and let the boy nap comfortably against his fur. He kept one ear pressed against Dom's belly, the other listening to the world around them. Just in case. They were safe where they were though, it had been over two years since they combined three clans and mostly everyone seemed content. The forest fae normally stayed hidden in their home in the trees, and Harald's old clan stayed in their village but they were run by him, Dom, Mod, and technically Tom by mating. Though the boys still barely admitted it. Kol couldn't wait for the day they stopped saying 'we're just good friends.' Good friends who live together and make love? Yeah. Alright. He supposed they both grew up thinking they weren't worthy of a relationship but they would learn. 

Harald's people had been surprisingly alright with being taken over, but maybe that was because they slaughtered the men who would have fought back. There were only a few left that might hate them- the daughters of the old chieftain, but even his wife had been thankful to be free and most of the younger girls had been pleased as well. Besides the forest folk being a little standoffish and Megna hating she was no longer special, they hadn't had a lot of trouble in the last two years. There were moments he almost thought of their home as a utopia of sorts. He wasn't the only leader which was incredibly calming but at the same time they all tended to treat him and Dom as the top of the food chain. He assumed it was the god thing but it worked for them. 

The wolf sighed deep, confused as to why he was letting his mind run wild instead of relaxing with his lover but that always seemed to happen. It was like his mind couldn't accept they were safe. His father and Bjørn had raised him to always expect the worst and be ready for war but now that wasn't needed. He didn't think. "Mmm, can 'ear yas. Stop it." The fae against him grumbled, tugging his fur. He huffed against Dom's swollen belly, his tongue flicking over it before he remembered he was just tasting his own piss. It wasn't the strangest thing he'd ever done but it wasn't the tastiest either. Dom might be safely scent marked but it changed his flavor. Win some, lose some. 

'Sorry ástin min.' He would say Dom couldn't hear him thinking but that wasn't exactly true. Their mating bond was strong and they were both magic creatures, they could at times reach into each other's minds and when not that deep inside- they could feel the other. 

"Bet tha' tastes yummy." The queen giggled, his eyes still closed against the sun coming through the trees. His voice was sleepy and his face gorgeous. There were streaks of dirt and drool and dried tears but even so he was the most perfect thing Kol had ever seen. He still found himself rolling his eyes and poking his tongue out at his wife. They were always playful. In a way even though they were parents, they were still so young. 

'I'd drink your piss. But my own? Eh.' He half joked, lolling his tongue out as if he were slightly disgusted. His mate giggled and finally started to sit up and the god felt his tail wagging as the boy scratched him absentmindedly. 'Come on, climb on me.' He commanded softly, ducking his head under his lover's arm. He didn't want Dom having to walk after all that, not if he could help. Of course the boy gave him a playful look, one brow arched and his lips curled in a smirk. 

"For once I don't fink I can daidí. Give me a bit, yeah?" The siren asked with a laugh that warmed Kol's heart and made his belly flip flop. 

'Fucker. I meant-' 

"Oh I know wha' ya meant. Can't get enough of me pussy yeah?" He mock preened, his hands under his chin to frame the cute innocent face he made. Kol'son knew he fell more in love with him every day but there were moments the siren took his breath away. As he dropped the act and took a deep breath he made a face. "May need a quick dip. Not tha' I don't love it but Ciarán might want fed and… 'Ey stop growling bout ya own son. Don't make me rub ya nose in it." 

'In what?' The Viking teased, finally just standing and shaking himself before pushing his snout under his wife and tossing the boy on his back. The squeal was precious but the hold around his neck was what really got him. 

☠️⚔️☠️

After taking a quick dip to wash the mess off- not completely but enough that no one would notice besides the smell- the pair were headed home to their hut when they felt as if someone was watching. They of course had plenty of people that might need something but would worry about interrupting so they tried not to get nervous but it was strange not being able to tell where the gaze was coming from. Kol finally decided to shift back, it was easier to speak to their people in the visage they were used to so he set his love down and called that power back into himself. 

Dom always loved watching the shift. It was strange because it seemed as if he just melted into a man. He tried so hard to focus and see how it worked but it appeared as if the wolf went blurry and the fur just… vanished. He'd vowed since the first day he witnessed it he'd learn the actual process but it never seemed to work. When his Viking was in the place where his wolf had just been he grinned and helped him stand up straight. He'd stay close while the human form worked to feel steady again. 

"Whoever is here you may greet us." Kol called out, trying to keep his boy somewhat hidden since they'd forgotten clothes. Their people were used to it but he wasn't sure which clan this person might be from.

A shimmer in the trees seemed to take shape slowly until it formed a man- no… a fae. He must have been. There were dark markings all over him, even on his shaven head. Before Kol might have thought they were tattoos but he learned better. There was a feeling to fairy kind and this one was strong as fuck. He was older seeming which the god knew meant he was probably hundreds if not thousands of years old, they didn't age like people did, they didn't even truly look like adults for so long. He couldn't help wondering what Modig would look like if he didn't have a human mother, would he seem as young as Dom did? The stranger's blue eyes stayed downcast, as if he were trying to be careful of seeing too much of his queen and Kol'son appreciated the gesture but he'd obviously been watching for a while. The man was familiar, something about him felt safe but he wasn't sure what or why. 

"I apologize for surprising you both. I was trying to find my way home but… I'm having trouble locating the door." He explained and his voice was softer than his warrior appearance would seem. "I am Tavis. I was just trying to find…" He trailed off as if confused and both leaders felt a pain from him they couldn't understand. 

"'Ave you been gone long?" Dom asked, his voice soft and sweet. "We 'ave people who know where it is. But talk to us?" He was being careful even though he could feel deep down he could trust the newcomer. There was just something about him. "Where did you come from?" He added, curling himself tighter around his mate. There was an aura around Tavis that made his soul ache. He didn't understand it but he didn't know if they were allowed to show someone the portal. Everyone was welcome in the forest land but… the fae were still careful. He'd been there around three years and he'd only been inside a few times. 

"I… I don't know. I feel like I've been gone…" Tavis paused and swallowed hard, his blue eyes lost and full of fear. "I was kept by the last chieftain, across the way. I think it was a long time but I'm not sure." 

"Harald has been dead for two years now, how are you just returning? This was your home, yes?" Kol asked, trying to help as much as he could but normally Dom was the people person.

Those ice eyes went wide and it looked as if the fae was about to panic. Dom huffed and stepped closer, ignoring his own nakedness to soothe someone he felt a kinship to. "You're safe now. I swear it. Kols killed the old chieftain and we own tha' land now. We 'ave an arrangement wiv the forest clan. The last leader stepped down not long ago. We can get you-" 

"Tavin! Is he still- does my brother live?" Marked hands reached out to grab Dom's wrists desperately and the man fell to his knees. The siren's eyes went wide and he flicked his gaze back to his mate. Did Kol catch that? Oh gods. 

"He does. He gave the crown to his nephew. I swear wha'ever 'appened you're safe now Tavis. Can you tell me?" Dom sniffled, he was more overwhelmed than he probably should be but he was wracked with hormones and he knew no matter what this would change so many lives. 

"I was trapped by Harald. Used for my magic. He thought I would break and let him into my home. He wanted as much power as he could get. Wait- did you say Kol? Kolvidur? Is that you? Tell me it's not been a decade already? Please?" Those blue eyes were filled with tears and so much heartbreak. 

"You knew my father?" Kol'son asked, stepping up behind his wife. He carefully wrapped his arms around Dom enough to cover the parts of him that were too close to Tavis's view for his liking but the man was obviously broken and didn't care. Fae were used to nudity but the Viking wasn't used to people seeing his lover nude. At least not face to dick.

Tavis gasped, looking them up and down. He was obviously trying to do math that was breaking his heart and mind. Dom was trying to do the same math but for a different reason. He knew Modig was slightly older than Kol but… "Yes um… He was a gangly boy last I saw. How is he? How is Inga?" That was obviously what he wanted to ask the most but fae royalty were nothing but proper, even in moments like that. Dom could tell his husband was still making sense of things and the newcomer was holding his breath. 

"Inga is alive and well. She fhought you was dead. Kolvidur and Bjørn are both gone 'ough." He soothed and the shuddering breath that escaped him made Dom cry as well. He was still holding the royal's hands, trying to help ground him. He should have known automatically who the stranger was by the feeling that came off him. It was the same he got years before the first night the seer broke into his and Kol's hut to introduce himself. Did Tavis even know? Gods this felt like a story.  "I'm sorry but it's been longer 'an tha'. Over two decades. 'Ow did you get free? You should 'ave been free years ago." He was so confused over that and worried that they still had evil in their midst. 

"His daughter came to me. She said if I did her bidding she'd let me free but she didn't do any of the correct ritual to bind me. I lied because I needed to come home. I needed to see my brother and my-" His mouth closed, his jaw clenching. Dom could understand being scared to call a human a mate but it sounded as if it were true for him and Inga. She was from a special family too. 

"She's at 'ome. Come on. Come wiv us. She'll be 'appy to see yas." Dom vowed nervously. Did the poor fae even know he had a son? "'Ow did you end up wiv 'Arald?" 

Tavis stood but kept his hand in Dom's. They started walking slowly home but he worried his precious pup of a husband was still mentally catching up. He didn't seem to realize he was looking at his uncle. Fuck what a day it was turning out to be. He couldn't even walk straight and yet he had to be strong for his family. Modig was like a brother to them both and Inga was the mother he never truly had. 

"My love was sent to him. I don't know if they found out we were to be mated or what but… her father stole her away and sent her to his best friend's home. At least that's what Kolvi told me. I went to find her and I was trapped. They didn't like the thought of her wedding a fae I suppose but it seems they've grown more comfortable with it?" He asked of Dom and the boy snorted. 

"No. Well… like I said, Kolvidur and Bjørn and their father are gone. No wonder Inga accepted me so easily." He hummed softly and he felt Kol'son stop dead in his tracks. 

"Oh fuck." And there it was. The god had finally caught up. He could feel a thousand questions burning in his mate's mind but first they needed to get home. He could only focus on one thing at a time and first he wanted clothes, then he wanted to find his aunt alone. "Yeah um… shit. Yeah. We can find a place for you and then we'll take you to them. Her! Her. We'll take you to her." 

Dom fought not to roll his eyes and elbow his love but at least they were on the same wavelength. Tavis smiled, something he obviously wasn't used to anymore but he tried before hugging the boy close. "Thank you! You have no idea how much this means to me." He sniffled, obviously trying to stay strong. 

"Yeah maybe don't thank us yet." Kol mumbled and Dom let himself elbow him then. Chieftain or not the god had never been taught the same manners the fae had. He loved him that way though, every brute and crass inch. 

Author's Note/Tags: @manicpixiedreamb0y @hollywoodxwhore @jaxbreaker @cole-way-iero28 @iamnotanearthlingmotherfucker 🖤

Ahhhh new plot! Old secrets! Someone wasn't actually dead?! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, I wonder if I kept it mysterious enough or if you figured it out automatically. At least it's happy surprise plot? Hopefully 🫣🖤☠️

#yungblud #dominic harrison #dom harrison #machine gun kelly #mgk #colson baker #dom and colson #dom and colson fic #dom x colson #dom x colson fic #yungblud and machine gun kelly #yungblud and machine gun kelly fic #yungblud x machine gun kelly #yungblud x machine gun kelly fic #com #com fics #domson #domson fics #my fics #jinx fics #abo #alpha beta omega #vikings #fae #gods #fantasy #viking/selkie abo au #wolf #shifters

[ameliawarnerr]

Evanescent Sequel

Chapter 4 (Part 1)

Previous Chapter: here

Jake

It has been twenty minutes since I started to drive home. Even though I don’t like talking nonsense I cannot deny the fact that I enjoyed the last twenty minutes of nonsense we talked about. And somewhere between that nonsense she fell asleep. The little glances I am stealing from her face are making me drive slower than ever. She might get a good nap till we reach home. 

Things have changed between us— we have changed individually. We are no longer young idiots who let their emotions get the best of them or careless enough to fall in love with strangers. People learn from mistakes is something I have spent my whole life hearing but it makes sense to me only now. To think about it now, our timing had been wrong. The desperation to be with each other was overwhelming in an extremely early stage of our relationship due to which we both ended up getting hurt. It sounded romantic then. Now it smells like the past. She understands it as much as I do. 

What she said about us being the endgame still gives me an unexplainable feeling in my stomach. 

And that's when I decide to stop. 

I try to feed myself the truth— she came to me for help not because she shared the same issue as me. The issue of not being able to get over her. She was pretending to be with Alex for her father's sake. Perhaps due to that lie she didn't get the chance to meet men better than me. She’ll be free from that lie soon and I do not have the confidence to claim that she’ll still choose me. 

That's when I focus on driving rather than her face. 

When we reach the parking lot of my apartment, I sigh. I am met with two choices— the number one being me waking her up and ruining her sleep and the second one is hardly any better- carry her myself. 

I cannot believe I am getting this troubled over it but I truly do not wish to ruin her sleep. I know it feels to get up when you are sleeping so peacefully. And my overthinking is unstoppable. What if she hasn't slept well in days because she was worried about her sister? What if she can't sleep once I wake her up? 

I decide to text Garrett. Not Lucas, of course. He’ll give me the worst advice, I am sure, like sleeping in the car myself and when she wakes up again, explaining to her the trouble I was having so she'll think I am a gentleman. 

I furrow my brows as I realise that Lucas' mindset is slowly sliding into my mind.

Jake: What do you do when you have a girl sleeping in your passenger's seat? 

Jake: a) wake her up and ruin her sleep

Jake: b) carry her yourself 

Garrett: Well, it depends on the status of your relationship. Is she just a friend? A. Is she more than a friend? B, def. 

I send a quick text back. 

Jake: How do you decide the status? 

Garrett: Are you kidding me…

Garrett: Do b and her reaction will tell you the status. 

I sigh, keeping my phone back. That was an informative conversation. 

I get out of the car and open the door to the passenger's seat. That's when I realise another problem- she's wearing a dress. I open the back door of the car and grab a blanket. As I cover her leg to avoid any sort of malfunctioning, she moves in her sleep turning her head towards mine. If she opens her eyes now, she'll freak out because of the closeness. The softness of her skin reminds me of every time I’ve touched her. 

Minutes pass by and I am unable to move. My eyes are glued to her face and memories are flowing. Our time in Duskwood was both mesmerising and terrifying. I haven't allowed myself to visit those moments but I can't help it now. Can’t deny how— 

My phone buzzes in my pocket and I hesitantly pull away from her. I check the phone. 

Garrett: We need you. The kidnapper sent a new video to the client. 

The fact that I’ve been desperately waiting for this update and now it appears to be a burden is concerning. But I am not ready to lose my disciplined self yet. I’ve done it once. I want to be careful this time. 

I lift her up with one hand under the back of thighs and the other supporting her neck. She sleeps like dead that I am certain of. So there's no worry of her waking up. I only need to keep my movements limited and stiff. 

In the elevator, she snuggles into my chest and her vanilla smells messes with my self-control. 

I try to focus on the case in my hands but my thoughts always come to one dead end- her in my arms. 

I still cannot believe we met yesterday after one year and I have her in my arms right now. 

The elevator stops.

In between the sixth and seventh floor. 

I rush towards the buttons and manage to press a few with my hand which is under her neck. Nothing works. 

I can't even use my phone with her in my arms and letting her lie on the floor in an uncomfortable position is a big no. 

That's it.

We’re stuck. 

___________________

Yes there will be a part 2 of chapter 4!

And idk about you guys but I absolutely love that Jake can rely on his friends and trusts them without thinking twice. Yes it's the same man who had EXTREME trust issues.

Your replies are like fuel so.....do comment!

Thanks for reading!

Love ya

;)

#duskwood #writing #duskwood fandom #duskwood fanfic #duskwood fanfiction #jake_duskwood #jake x mc #duskwood jake x mc #dan duskwood #jessy_duskwood #jake duskwood #duskwood jake #mc x jake #fanfic writers #fanfic community #fanfiction #fanfic

[nomoreusername]

Trouble(Part 1)

Pairing: Harriet x female reader

Summary:What should be another lecture from Harriet ends in something more.

Harriet, Harriet, Harriet. The things I could say about her. I could say that she was a control freak. I could say that she didn't know how to have fun. I could say that she was such a stick in the snow all the time.

I don't though. I know better than to insult the first-in-command. I just roll my eyes when she can't see and get on with my day.

Apparently, luck decided to run out about that as I ended up alone with her in her tent, being lectured by her on safety or something. I tuned her out a while ago. By this point that was basically second nature.

"Are you listening to a word I'm saying?"She snapped, waving her hands in my face.

"You want the truth or the answer that won't piss you off?"

"Are you-are you kidding?"She stuttered.

"Whenever do I joke, Harriet? I am as serious as they come,"I gasped, expecting her annoyed reaction. I also more than got it as she tapped her foot with her arms crossed. She seemed five seconds away from storming out of here. Honestly, I kind of wish that she would.

Since she was taking too long with that though, I knew that I would have to do it for her. With a sigh, I stood up to go back outside and do my job. Surely, that would make her happy.

As I was ready for the crunch of snow under my boots, and the cold wind on my face, she pulled me back by my hood. I almost tripped over my own feet as she sat me back down in my original spot on her cot.

"What the hell was that for?"I demanded to know.

"You need to listen,"She tried to reason.

"No, I don't,"I said through gritted teeth. Staring at each other, we silently dared the other to back down. With her arms still crossed, and my eyes narrowed at her, the tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife.

"I am first-in-command,"She suddenly tried to reason.

"Oh, my sincere apologies. Allow me to bow down, your majesty,"I scoffed.

"Excuse me?"

"Yeah. What'd you even do to get that title? It was the bad luck of the draw, and yours was the worst. That's not my problem,"I pointed out.

Sitting there, I expected her to say something back to me. After all, that's how things always go. That's how they're meant to.

It didn't though as her eyes glistened with tears. I just froze as I wondered if this was actually real. Was Harriet actually about to cry, in front of me, because of me? Did I-did I make Harriet cry?

"You have no idea what it was like being all alone. Not a single one,"She scowled. I felt the heat rise to my cheeks as shame bubbled in the pit of my stomach. "For an entire month I thought that I was going to lose my mind. I thought that maybe I had done something wrong. I thought I was just going to be isolated forever,"She spilled.

"Harriet-"

"I did it alone. It wasn't just some bad luck. It was terrifying. You know I came up with dead people already here?"

"Harriet-"

"I worked my ass off to make this place what it is. I picked myself up and started working just in case someone did join me one day. If not, at least I'd have some place to go crazy in."

"Harriet-"

"I have earned that title. Absolutely earned it. I am a damn good leader so-"

"I know you are,"I interrupted. She stopped talking as she looked me in my eyes, hers still having little tears in them.

Standing up, I stood before her. She didn't move away as I hesitantly reached my hand out and placed it on her cheek. Using my thumb, I wiped some of them from her face.

At some point we had moved closer without even realizing. Barely an inch away from each other, I took in her features. With her sweet caramel eyes, long eyelashes, and soft seeming lips, she was beautiful, stunning, absolutely gorgeous.

Still cupping her face, I brushed my lips against hers. She wasn't the slightest bit caught off guard as she put her hands behind my neck. Pulling her as close as possible to me, my heart felt something it never had before as we fit together like we were made for each other. Only when we needed air did we pull away, keeping our foreheads together as if we were immediately going to start again.

Gazing at her, seeing her leftover tears, reminded me that I was the one who had made her cry. It reminded me just how well that would end.

"I'm sorry,"I breathed out when the reality of what we were doing set in. Without another word I pulled myself out of her arms and rushed out of the tent, leaving her standing there by herself.

#harriet x reader #harriet tmr #tmr harriet #the maze runner #one shot #tmr #enemies to lovers #part 1/4 #light angst #light fluff #fluff and angst

[felicitysmoaksx]

Happy Monday everyone! Hope this update finds you well! After this, we only have one more chapter and that isn't coming out till Friday or Saturday! As always thanks for the kudos and comments and I hope you enjoy this chapter!

My song recs for this chapter are Call It What You Want by Taylor Swift and At Least by Jessica Biao

Rating: Explicit (Minors DNI 18+)

Summary:  Blue eyes flicked down to his lover asleep once more. Her chest rose and fell in a steady rhythm. There was not a doubt in his mind that he knew Sarah. At least where it counted. He knew what kind of person she was. He knew her heart. But he didn’t know the stories of what made her heart the way that he knew it.  

Word Count: 5.6k

Warnings: Sexual Content, Depictions of parental abandonment, depictions of violence, inaccurate medical procedures, and implied/references a canonical character death.

Read On AO3 | Fic Playlist | Want to be tagged when I post a Rheese story?

Hold On, I Still Want You Ch. 4

Sarah was transferred to the ICU after her surgery. Voight’s son was already up there because they couldn’t find any bullet in him. Connor breathed a sigh of relief when she was wheeled into the small room. Even if it was intensive care. 

He was texting Lindsay about her transfer when Ava walked into the room. “I’ve been in contact with Detective Lindsay.” 

At Connor’s look of confusion, the blonde woman continued, “She’s Sarah's emergency contact. She also has medical power of attorney. She has told me, I can share information with you about Sarah’s case.” 

“So how bad was it?” He asked, seeing her face and bracing for the worst. But to his relief, his partner in the field of sorts, held up her hands with the beginnings of a smile on her face.

“She did really well, all things considered. We had to give her three more units of blood and one plasma. She got lucky, with the way the bullets went in, she might’ve been paralyzed or it could’ve hit her esophagus. We pulled out two bullets, but they never perforated her spine or went through her esophagus. It’s almost as if she had a shield in front of her.”

Connor sighed heavily in relief and turned back to look at his lover. Though she was still pale, a little color had returned to her so her skin no longer looked translucent. She wore a neck brace, but that was just so she didn’t move her neck in her sleep if she became restless. Then his trauma surgeon's brain caught something. Last time he saw Sarah she was bagged and being attached to a ventilator. But now…He turned back to Ava, “You extubated her. She’s breathing on her own.”

“I took a chance in recovery. She passed the breathing tests with flying colors, was protecting her airway, and her oxygen levels and CO2 stats were good so I took her breathing tube out.” The blonde explained with a shrug. 

“Thank you,” Connor exhaled audibly and said in a sincere tone, “I know you really don’t care for trauma. But you helped her when I couldn’t.”

The blonde smirked at him, “We both know that you would’ve. If I hadn’t been there. Or at least tried.” 

Connor looked sheepish as he rubbed the back of his neck. He would’ve, but they both know it would’ve been dangerous for him and Sarah both.  

Ava graced him with one of her rare genuine smiles. Her gaze flicked to her friend and patient that lay asleep in the bed. “Besides, I did it as much for her as I did for you. When I first came to Med, you know Reese was the first person to reach out to me?”

“No,”

Her gaze flicked back to Connor as she chuckled, “She told me she knew how it felt to be the new girl. Said it’d just take time for people to warm up. Asked me how I was settling in and when I said I was struggling a little with putting a few furniture pieces together, she texted me the next day asking if I was still having trouble with my furniture and if I wanted help with them before asking for my address. She showed up with Dr. Halstead’s brother, Atwater, and Ruzek in tow. My remaining furniture pieces got put together that day. She was also the one who told me you weren’t that bad and that I should give you a chance.” 

“She did?” The double-certified surgeon glanced behind him, half expecting his lover to confirm or deny what the other woman was saying. But to his slight dismay, even though he knew it wasn’t going to happen, his lover remained still, with her eyes closed.

“Yeah, she said you were a good guy. Said you were a little rough around the edges, but you really cared about your patients and tried to do your best to help them. Just that you also had a lot going on at the time because of Robin.”

“She never mentioned that…” Sarah never mentioned a lot, he was learning as the day went on. 

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Throughout the day, his lover had a revolving door of visitors, though she never knew it. Everyone from the ED, even Doris. (who Sarah thought didn’t particularly like her) Goodwin came in not long after Ava had left him alone. She stayed for a few minutes before Dr. Choi sent her an urgent page. 

And to Connor’s shock, Dr. Latham made an appearance. 

“Dr. Latham,” Connor started as he stood up to address his attending doctor, “I know I have that teachable bypass today-”

But his mentor held up a hand, “It has been taken care of. Dr. Bekker informed me of what happened and volunteered to lead the surgery. I'm sorry about Dr. Reese. She has always been kind to me when others have not.”

Latham struggled with emotions and his bedside manner was a little lacking conventionally.  The dark-haired surgeon knew that, but he had also worked with his mentor long enough to know that his coldness didn’t mean he didn’t care-that he wasn’t sincere. 

“Thank you, Dr. Latham.” He said to his mentor as he sat back down. He grabbed Sarah’s hand once more. 

“I hope Dr. Reese has a fast recovery and you take as much time as you need to be with her. Dr. Bekker and I have your patients,”

Connor’s mentor left a few minutes later and when they were alone again, Connor leaned up and pressed a kiss to Sarah’s forehead. He lingered a little, needing to feel her skin against his for a moment. Then he whispered, “Did you hear that, Sarah? I don’t have to leave you for a long while. You’re stuck with me. You just have to open those brown eyes that I’m such a damn sucker for.” 

Dr. Charles and his family (his wife, Robin, and her husband, Marcus) came by a little after Dr. Latham left. By way of greeting the older man said, “Sharon told us what happened.”

“Dr. Bekker said she’s responding well. The surgery went as well as expected, but she will be looking at a pretty good recovery time, but she should pull through.” Connor answered the unasked question Dr. Charles was asking. 

Sarah’s boss nodded. The double-certified surgeon half expected him to say something in that shrink voice of his. 

(“Don’t call it a shrink voice Connor! Shrink has bad connotations to it.” Sarah’s voice echoed in his head.)  

But a little to his surprise it was his ex-girlfriend that spoke up. Not that should’ve surprised him, he knew Robin held Sarah in very high regard after Sarah treated her. She always said Sarah didn’t make her feel like she was going crazy. Even when her tumor was making it so, “Good. She’s too much of an excellent doctor to lose.”

Caroline Charles broke away from her husband’s side and shuffled closer to the hospital bed. 

“Poor girl,” she said quietly as she reached down and squeezed Sarah’s hand, noticing the bruises and marks on both of her wrists.

“What happened here? Sharon didn’t mention this. Daniel, come and look at her wrists.”

Connor ran a hand through his hair. His blue eyes had pointedly chosen not to look at her wrists if he didn’t have to because every time he did, the already agitated monster in his chest, at Sarah being shot, would roar at the sight of her wrists. And he’d have to resist the urge to storm out and find the guy, and strangle him with his bare hands himself. 

“Her wrists and the other victim’s wrists were bound together with barbed wire when they were brought in,” his lover’s hand spasmed in his. Connor knew it was just a reflex, but it was almost as if Sarah knew they were talking about her. 

Marcus hissed, “My buddy is a corrections officer. He says that’s what prisoners do when they want the message across that something is personal.”

The hand that wasn’t holding Sarah’s, curled into a tight fist. The monster raged and roared in his chest. 

“Voight’s son right? That’s who the other victim is?” Dr. Charles questioned. Connor nodded. The older man sighed heavily as he took off his glasses to clean them. 

“I don’t envy the conversation Sharon is on her way to have with Hank right now. Last I heard, Sam Abrams is in the process of legally declaring his son brain dead. Dr. Choi called him for a consult because they found damaged brain tissue.” 

“Is he brain dead? They can’t repair the damage done to the brain tissue?” Caroline asked, and her husband shook his head. He explained, “In a way. The bullet that he was hit with went right through his brain tissue and that doesn’t regenerate like skin tissue will. Brain tissue doesn’t come back at all and there is no procedure we have that can repair tissue like that yet. He won’t wake up again. Ever.”

“And it went right through him because Ava pulled two bullets out of Sarah. But scans showed no bullets in him and we know Dr. Choi was thorough.” Connor said, “The running theory is that he saved her life because Ava said with where the bullets were, her injuries should’ve been a lot worse. Torn esophagus, and possibly being paralyzed from the waist but miraculously, they’re not. Almost as if she had a shield in front of her.”

“Or someone acting as one in front of her,” Dr. Charles said grimly. 

The Charles family left soon after. Caroline had a check-up for the clinical trial, after her heart valve surgery. Before Robin and her new husband left, she reached out and squeezed Connor’s shoulder. “I know this probably feels like déjà vu to you. But she’ll wake up, Connor. She’ll be okay. You and Dad keep me updated on her okay? And when she’s up for it, I’ll expect to catch up with you and her, alright?” 

“When she’s feeling better,” Marcus spoke quietly, “When she’s up for it we can go on a do-over double date. I’d like to thank her for what she’s done for my wife.”

“I hope everything works out for Cece and the clinical trial.” The surgeon glanced up at his ex-girlfriend and her husband before he nodded at them. Then his gaze returned to Sarah. He was alone with his lover once more. 

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He had been in the middle of telling Sarah a story from his childhood when there was a soft tapping at the door. Looking up, he raised a hand to acknowledge Justin’s wife, who stood there looking more lost than even he felt. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt. I just…didn’t know where else to go. Hank’s here and I wanted to give him some alone time with Justin. We’ve decided to…pull him off of life sup-port...” She mumbled as soon as she opened the door, her voice breaking at the end. She rubbed at her eyes which looked red and puffy like she had been crying. She probably had been. 

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Connor told her sympathetically and she nodded mutely. Then she moved to Sarah’s other side.

“Hank asked her to talk to him. That’s why she was there with him.” Olive broke the silence as she moved to fuss over the curly-haired brunette’s blanket. “Justin has-had a pretty rough past with getting into trouble. Hank worried he was falling into old habits, but he wouldn’t talk about it with his dad. So Hank asked Sarah to talk to him.”

“Was he? Falling back into old habits?” He asked and two fat tears rolled down Olive’s cheeks. It made Connor feel bad having to ask. But he needed to know that Sarah wasn’t shot over a stupid mistake. “No, just the opposite. He was trying to help a friend’s widow get out of that life after her ex-boyfriend roped her back into it. But he didn’t want Hank to get involved because he didn’t want to get her in trouble.”

“What happened to her? The lady he was trying to help?” Connor questioned. 

“Dead. They found her late last night. The same way they found Justin and Sarah. In the trunk of her car. But I didn’t know that until Hank told me ten minutes ago. I don’t think Justin knew either. He always said Hank never liked to bring work home.”

Meaning that today never should’ve happened because everything Justin Voight had done was for nothing and Sarah had just been caught in the crossfire of it all. The monster in his chest roared at the thought. To subdue the creature, Connor cradled her open palm in his and pressed her hand to his cheek. To serve as a reminder to him that she was still here; she wasn't going anywhere. They were just waiting for her to wake up.

He pressed a kiss to her palm just as another knock rattled against the window pane softly. Hank Voight stood on the other side of the door.

“Olive, they’re fixing to…” the older man trailed off when he slid the door open, “I thought you might want to be there when-when it happens.” 

Olive looked like she might cry again and Connor felt a swell of sympathy run through him. Still, the woman put on a brave face and nodded. She had started to make her out of the room, pausing only when she noticed Hank wasn’t following her. 

“Hank?”

“You go on ahead. I’ll be there in a minute.” The police sergeant promised her. When she was gone, back across the ICU, the older man moved more into the room. 

“Hey Kid,” Voight’s voice was low and gentle as he addressed Sarah, approaching her bedside. He laid a gentle hand on her forehead, “You know how I’ve always said I’m with you till the world blows up? Well, right now my world is pretty much blown to bits. So do me a favor, if you can, and keep fighting. I can’t imagine losing one kid right now. Let alone two.” 

Voight was Sarah’s dad? But before the question could take root in his mind, the man himself addressed Connor. 

“Thank you for staying with her.” 

“No place I’d rather be,” he told the police sergeant, “Just do me a favor and get this guy.”

“You can count on it,” Voight told him. His tone was lethal sounding. Connor eyed the other man. He didn’t know Hank Voight well, but he knew of the man’s reputation. Working in Chicago Med for the last three and half years had seen to that. Despite this being one of the very few conversations he had ever had with him, he believed Hank Voight when he said something. 

“Then I’ll be here till she asks me to leave,” Connor nodded to the woman sleeping in the bed. The older man nodded at him then with one last glance at Sarah and a squeeze to her free hand, he walked out of the room as quietly as he came in. 

Erin arrived not too long after that, holding a very worn-looking teddy bear under her arm. She stopped when she saw him sitting there. Her question came with an air of being stunned. “You really have been here the whole time, haven’t you?”  

“I told you I would be and I didn’t l want her to wake up alone. She doesn't deserve that,” he said while Sarah mumbled something in her sleep. 

“No one does,” the woman agreed, setting the bear down at the foot of the bed and watching as Connor shushed and soothed her pseudo-sister. 

He wasn’t who Erin pictured for Sarah. He was too brash and seemed a little too overconfident for her liking. Sarah needed someone who was patient with her. Someone a little soft. But then again, the other woman’s type mostly consisted of jerks that disguised themselves as nice guys first. Like Joey. Ugh. The manipulative, passive-aggressive asshole, who tried to make Sarah bad when she didn’t choose pathology. Besides the way the dark-haired man in front of Erin looked at Sarah…it was like he was in love with her. 

But that also prompted a question in Erin’s head.

“How long exactly have you and Sarah been together?” She asked, giving the question in her head a voice.

“Give or take about six months,” he answered, then he spied the worn stuffed animal, “You know the gift shop has a pretty good selection of bears to choose from.”

Six months and Erin hadn’t realized something was up till just two months ago? How? She thought to herself as she told him, “The bear has seen better days, I know. But I’ve known Sarah a long time and she’s had it for as long as I can remember. She’s sentimental about it. I stopped by her apartment to get it before coming here. I thought it might help if she had it. Some kind of luck, I guess.”

“No one has said they’re worried about her not making it through this. In fact, her doctor is very optimistic about her recovery. They even took out her breathing tube after they took the bullets out.” Connor interrupted the detective, even though she hadn’t asked. But the way she had said her last sentence had triggered something in him. 

Though Goodwin, Ava, and Abrams had stopped by to perform an unusual brain activity test in Connor’s opinion, because she was protecting her airway, and breathing on her own, and Ava hadn’t voiced any concerns about Sarah’s brain activity before the test. 

But it might’ve had to do with the tragedy of Justin Voight and that it was one of their own doctors that had the head of the hospital airing on the side of extra caution.  Erin Lindsay nodded at the information before asking, “What have you been doing here for hours?”

The surgeon shrugged, “Talking to her mostly. I’ve made all these kinds of promises to her when she wakes up.”

Erin’s lips twitched upward a little. Maybe there was a soft side to the brooding Connor Rhodes after all.

He gave another shrug, “They say comatose patients can hear everything you say. And even though she’s not in a coma and just heavily sedated, I thought the same principles might apply here.”

 He paused, the ghost of a smile appearing on his face as he gestured to Sarah, still fast asleep in the hospital bed. “I'm a sucker for brown eyes. But especially hers. All she has to do is bat them at me and I’m wrapped around her little finger and she knows it.”

“I bet she uses it to her advantage too.” The detective nodded with a snorted watery chuckle. Then she moved to face the girl in the bed; her tone was gentle, almost teasing as she said, “Hey, Sarah. Do you know Teddy is coming down from New York? I told him you were going to be fine. But he said he was still coming to see for himself and you know how much he hates coming to Chicago. Do you feel special yet?”

Then she grabbed Sarah’s hand and squeezed it softly as she explained to Connor, “My little brother. Teddy. I called him and told him what happened. He’s close to Sarah too. He’s coming from New York. But won’t be here till tomorrow.”

There was a lull and then…

“Have you found who did this yet?” Connor asked quietly as Erin looked down at Sarah. The detective looked back up and shook her head sadly, “We have a name and we can link him back to two other crimes and a good chance of linking him back to this one, but now it’s a matter of finding him. I just wanted to check on her before we start running down our leads.” 

“Thank you for staying with her.” She said after another beat of silence. He nodded but told her, “You don’t have to thank me, Detective Lindsay. I’m just sitting with her.”

“Dr. Rhodes, you are giving me peace of mind that the woman I’ve considered a sister for…I don’t even know how long, is not alone throughout all this. And with that peace of mind, I can catch this bastard that did this to them because I know that if she wakes up confused and scared, she’s not by herself.”

“Connor,” he said. 

“Huh?” 

“Call me Connor. Dr. Rhodes feels too formal for the situation. Especially when we have a person in common now.”

 “Then call me Erin.” 

[LINE BREAK]  [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK]

Ava came by to check on her one more time before she left for the night. “Rhodes, I’ll have my phone and pager on me all night. If something changes or happens, you call me. I don’t care about the hour of the night.” 

When she was leaving, April and Maggie showed up a second time before they also went home for the night. They exchanged a few words and tight smiles between the three women. But when the charge nurse saw him, she sighed and folded her arms. “Okay. You’ve been here all day. According to Sandra,”

She gestured to the ICU charge nurse, “The only time she or any of the other nurses have seen you leave is to use the restroom. You are going to go get you something to eat and shower. April and I will stay with her while you’re gone.” 

“Maggie, I’m-”

“When was the last time you ate Connor? Got something to drink? Or got some fresh air? It’ll take an hour at best. You’ll be back before you know it and like I said, April and I will be here with her in case she wakes up.”

It didn’t help that his stomach chose that moment to grumble, announcing that it was running on empty. He sighed and glanced at his lover. Leaning down to kiss her forehead, he whispered: “I’ll be right back baby. I promise.”

With a heavy sigh, Connor stood and looked at the two nurses. He conceded, “An hour.”

The two nurses nodded back with smiles that were equally encouraging as they were sympathetic. 

“We’ll be here,” April reassured him smoothly as she sidestepped him to take the seat he had been occupying.

“Hey Sarah, how are you holding up?” He heard her ask his lover. When the charge nurse saw him trying to linger, she shooed him once more. 

“Go, Connor. We got her.” He sighed and turned, forcing his legs to carry him away from Sarah’s room and to the cafeteria first. 

[LINE BREAK]  [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK]

Thirty minutes later, Connor was back with his hair damp, in a change of clothes, and his messenger bag slung over his shoulder. Maggie raised an eyebrow when she looked up and saw him. 

“I ate. You can ask Mary in the cafeteria, she served me. And I took a shower, those were your two main requirements. You never actually said how long it had to take…Speaking of, how long has he been here and trying to stare a hole through her?” 

Neither nurse asked who the double-certified was referring to. But April hesitated with her answer before she shrugged, “A few minutes after you left. Word around the hospital is that he’s pissed.” 

“Pissed? What the hell does he have to be pissed about?” 

“Nothing from everyone else’s perspective. But from his…how much has Sarah told you about her relationship with Joey?” 

“Not much.” Nothing at all in fact. All Connor knew was that he hit Sarah up a few times a month looking for a booty call that she never answered because she was with Connor. But the lab tech was persistent. Until she finally blocked him after a particular lewd message. And that he looked at her as if she was a piece of meat.

“Joey tends to have a type. Med students in rotation at this hospital. The rules dictate that residents and above doctors in departments can’t date med students in rotation. However, the basement never gets any med students for rotation so he found a loophole in that rule because of that. He just moves from one med student to the next. I didn’t know about it till Reese started dating him. Everyone thought maybe she was the one to break his running streak because they continued dating after her rotation.” April explained and Connor folded his arms. 

Because what April was describing…Sure Connor himself had dated a few of his co-workers, and was dating one now technically. He wasn’t faulting anyone for that. But his three serious-ish relationships compared to the ratio of the revolving door to who knows how many medical students? It was disgusting on Joey’s part. But Connor wasn’t seeing how this came back to Sarah. 

“And he’s pissed because?” 

“Because he thought she was still upset over their breakup and liked that because he thought she was still going to be there when he broke up with whatever med student he was seeing.” Which explained him hitting her up a few times a month. Connor thought with a clenched jaw but didn’t say it aloud because April was still talking. 

 “When in reality she had moved on…and from an objective point of view, she didn’t move on, she upgraded guys. A double-certified surgeon who looks like you and is more than likely someone who treats a woman right is a huge step up from a manipulative, passive-aggressive lab technician, who had a tantrum when his ex-girlfriend didn’t go into the field he thought she should. That’s what Sarah told me broke the camel’s back in their relationship. The tantrum.”

Connor felt himself stiffen. Now he was starting to understand about Sarah’s hesitancy to trust him, if this was what her last relationship was like.

“Will you do me a favor when you leave?” Connor asked in a mask of calm, but in reality, he was anything but.

“Sure,” 

“Tell him to leave me and Sarah alone, because if he doesn’t, I’ve been itching to hit something all day, and I wouldn’t mind breaking his jaw or nose right about now. Also, loophole be damned, if he so much as looks at another med student inappropriately, I’ll go file the complaint with Goodwin myself.” 

The two nurses looked at each other before they looked back at him and nodded. “We’ll take care of it.”

Then Maggie looked back at Sarah, “We’ve got to get going, Sarah. Early shift tomorrow, You know how it is, but we’ll be back to check on you sometime tomorrow okay?” 

April made a noise in agreement and squeezed Sarah’s hand before she stood up. They both patted Connor’s shoulder as they passed by him to get out of the room. He turned and watched them leave and saw both nurses stop by where Joey was sitting. 

The lab tech looked at the two women before he turned back and glared at him as April and Maggie walked away. But the surgeon folded his arms and remained steady. Daring him to try something even though he had promised Sarah, after Joey’s last text, that he wouldn’t get involved and let her handle him.  Sarah also wasn’t awake right now to stop him and the surgeon also wasn’t one to make idle or empty threats. If he said something, Connor usually meant it. 

Thankfully, Joey just sneered at him one last time before he got up from where he was sitting and walked off. He wouldn’t have to break a promise to Sarah. Sighing, Connor returned to the seat he had been occupying before. 

“Hi baby, I’m back.” He said reaching to grab her hand again. A yawn fell from his lips as he pressed his lips to her skin. He had only worked half his shift and it wasn’t even that late, but it had felt as if he had worked three shifts back to back. 

He didn’t remember falling asleep but one moment he had been talking to Sarah and he could see the moon through the window; the next someone was shaking him awake with the sun shining in his eyes. Jerking up, Connor looked around and saw Maggie was back with a blonde-haired man in tow behind her. He wore make-up and had manicured hands with a pair of jeans and a hoodie; he was also white as a sheet and his eyes were wide as he gazed at Sarah. 

“Sorry, Connor. I didn’t want to wake you up.” The nurse apologized, making her way back to the doorway where the other man stood. “But this is Teddy Courtney. He says he’s here to visit Sarah.” 

At her introduction, the dark-haired man stood up. Still fighting off sleep, he offered Teddy his hand. 

“Erin’s brother right? She told me you were coming. I’m Connor Rhodes, Sarah’s…Sarah’s boyfriend.” His hesitance at the label had nothing to do with the relationship itself, but this was the first time he had introduced himself as such and it felt so wrong to do so without her.

Teddy glanced down to look at Connor’s hand, then took it with his fishnet-gloved one. But like his sister yesterday when she left the hospital for the first time, Connor didn’t think the other man was actually seeing him because his eyes hadn’t left Sarah’s sleeping form and the more he looked, the more he seemed lost. 

“Thanks for bringing him up Maggie,” he said quietly as Teddy walked deeper into the room, “I’ll take it from here.” 

But the charge nurse looked reluctant to leave. It’s moments like this that Connor was reminded how starkly they felt the same need to help people and make them feel better. That’s why Maggie took the arrest when he refused to do that blood draw on that kid. They just handled the need in different ways. Connor focused on the physical body while Maggie handled everything else.

“You sure? I know you’ve been up here all night.” 

“Sandra tell you that?” He quipped at her before he glanced at the other man. Then the dark-haired man nodded, “I’m sure. Just page Ava and let her know that we might need her to explain a few things when she has a chance.”

“Copy,” 

[LINE BREAK]  [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK]

“What happened?” Teddy asked, but it felt as if he wasn’t talking to Connor because he continued before the other man could answer. He watched the other man pick up the worn teddy bear and hold it tight to his chest. “Everyone said that Justin had gone straight. He even said he had gone straight since he joined the Marines. But even before that, Sarah, you told me that when you were growing up, Justin kept you and that kind of life very separated. So what the hell happened yesterday?”

Then as if he was remembering Connor was there, he turned and sighed, dropping his head. The other man was just finishing off a text to Lindsay to let her know that Teddy was there. 

“Sorry,” he muttered 

“No, I’ve been asking myself…her that very same question since yesterday.” 

“She’s going to be okay right? Like they aren’t worried about her?” 

Connor shook his head, “Her doctor is confident she’ll make a full recovery. So confident that they removed her breathing tube right after surgery because she is breathing on her own. They wouldn’t have done that if they were worried about her.” 

Teddy nodded, squeezing the bear even tighter to his chest. He swiped at his watering eyes and shook his head, “I don’t even know why I’m crying. You just said she’s going to be okay.”

“Relief?” Connor mused, trying to make the other man feel better. He took his seat by Sarah’s side once more while he explained, “I’ve seen a lot of my patients' loved ones cry when they find out the patient is going to be okay. It’s more normal than you think. And if it’ll help, I had the nurse that brought you up, page Sarah’s doctor and put her on standby in case you want a more thorough explanation on how she’s going to be okay. But in the meantime, I can answer any questions you have.”

Teddy bobbed his head. Then he took the seat on the other side of Sarah’s head, setting the bear down on her stomach so it could be close to her. “You know, I’m here now.”

 Connor raised an eyebrow at his words, so the blond cleared his throat and explained, “Erin told me about you too. She said you had been staying up here so if Sarah woke up, she wasn’t by herself. And I’m not trying to kick you out, but I heard the nurse too. She said you’d been here all night. So if you want to take a break for a while, go get some sleep or something? And you’re a doctor here too right? If you need to get back to work…I’m not going anywhere. She won’t be by herself when she wakes up..”

“I’m okay. I’d still like to stay, if that's okay with you. I’m just… not ready to leave her right now.” The surgeon told him. Sarah was okay now and he knew she was going to be fine. She was going to wake up. She was just sedated because of her pain medication. But still the thought of leaving her? Even with Lindsay’s little brother here, the thought left him feeling a little anxious. Like if he left something bad would happen.

From the look the other man gave him, he understood what Connor was feeling. Teddy exhaled softly, “Okay.” 

“Okay,” 

Then it was back to the waiting game as they watched her sleeping form, hoping she’d wake up soon. 

(It’d be another three hours before then under the sedation of her medication.)

#One Chicago #Chicago Med #Chicago PD #Sarah Reese #Connor Rhodes #Erin Lindsay #Hank Voight #Teddy Courtney #Voight Family Values #My writing

[oliverreedmasterass]

Words: 4k

Summary: the guys get up to some hijinks and hair trouble on the set of their Heat Above music video 

Warnings: language, Sam’s hair in jeopardy

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Sam would have been more eager to get in front of the camera for their new music video if it wasn’t obvious that the entire set was some kind of elaborate prank caused by the mastermind that was unfortunately his older brother.

Sam didn’t have any solid evidence to prove his theory that what he had originally thought would be a music video for their upcoming single was actually an opportunity for Josh to get blackmail of him, but he trusted his gut. It only made sense that Josh would be motivated to make a huge fool out of him after Sam had called him a hobbit earlier in the week in front of their entire production team. The technicians all thought it was hilarious, and so had Sam, but after taking one look at Josh’s scour, he knew he was going to pay for it later.

And apparently now was later.

Sam stared at his reflection in the mirror with an uncharacteristic grimace. He was dressed in a suit that made him look like the tin man, but that wasn’t the worst part. On top of his head was what looked like an aluminum foil helmet engulfing his entire face. Only Josh could think of putting him in something so god-awful.

“I can’t go out there looking like this,” Sam grumbled to his reflection, messing with the headpiece to try and make it look even mildly better. It was no use. If anything, the headpiece proved that Sam’s best feature was his hair, because it was completely hidden beneath the shining silver, and he looked awful.

To Sam’s horror, Danny invited himself into his trailer without knocking and immediately let out a confused laugh.

“What the hell is on your head?” he asked. Sam winced.

“Am I wearing this right?”

Danny immediately picked up on Sam’s discomfort and hurried to his side, poking at the fabric with confusion.

“I honestly can’t tell,” he admitted after a minute of silent contemplation. “I don’t think there’s any way to wear that and look good.”

“Fuck,” Sam said.

“I’m sure the costume people wouldn’t mind if you chucked it,” Danny suggested.

“Oh no, they’d be heartbroken if you did,” Josh appeared in the doorway, looking at Sam with a smug grin that immediately made him guilty. “They worked so hard on that, it would be a tragedy to toss it in the bin.”

“Why don’t you wear it then?” Sam said, reaching up to tear it off and throw it at Josh’s face. Before he could, Jake joined Josh’s side and, much to Sam’s disdain, started to laugh louder and harder than he had ever heard before. Even more than the time Josh accidentally set his ass on fire when he was trying to light one of his farts.

“I thought I got the short end of the stick when they gave me white tights,” he gasped out after catching his breath. “I was so wrong.”

“I still think you got the short end of the stick with those tights,” Sam told Jake with a frown. “Please don’t take that sash off, you’ll ruin my day if you do.”

“I think your day’s already ruined if you’re gonna have to wear that thing,” Danny told Sam. Sam hated that he was right. Even though he knew Josh would throw a fit, Sam reached up to take the horrid thing off his head.

“Oh no,” Sam’s face caved in with fear.

“What?” his bandmates asked.

“It won’t come off,” Sam whispered.

This caused both Jake and Josh to erupt into such loud and boisterous laughter that Danny had to push them outside and lock the door so he could focus on helping Sam. Sam appreciated the gesture, but he could still hear their cackles outside which made his skin crawl.

“How is it stuck?” Danny asked lightly, coming back to poke at the headpiece.

“I think it got caught in my hair,” Sam winced after giving it another tug. Danny tried to slip his fingers inside the fabric around the crown of Sam’s head and patted around.

“Oh yikes,” he murmured.

“What?”

“You’re right, it’s super tangled.”

“Shit.”

“I have no clue how you managed to do that, dude.”

“Josh must have known this was going to happen.”

“I think you’re giving him way too much credit.”

Sam threw himself back onto the trailer’s leather couch and leaned forward so his head was in between his knees. Danny watched in wonder as Sam attempted to peel the headpiece off, starting around his neck and moving up to the scalp. He made a couple grunts in pain as he got closer to getting it fully off but, by the time he reached the crown of his head, Danny saw what the problem was.

For an unknown reason to him, there was a complex pattern of sequins sewn on the inside of the fabric, which had conveniently intertwined with Sam’s hair in such a chaotic way, Danny wondered if Sam had given himself a noogie, because there was no other explanation for how it could be that bad. It looked bad, like something only scissors could fix. That was news Danny was in no rush to tell Sam.

Sam gave up trying to tug the headpiece off and held his head in his hands with a frown.

“It’s bad, isn’t it?” he asked Danny.

“It’s not good,” Danny said.

“Shit,” Sam grumbled.

Outside the door where Jake and Josh’s laughs had finally died down, one of the set PAs knocked on the door.

“We need you out there in 5!” she called in.

“Is it something we can fix in 5?” Sam asked Danny. Danny studied Sam’s face that was pale with fear. His eyes tracked back to the mess of fabric and hair on his head.

“You need 25 minutes at least.”

Someone knocked on the door again and Sam and Danny both shouted that they were coming soon, and to just give them a second. But, to their surprise, instead of the set PA, Jake let himself back into the trailer. Sam was disturbed to find that he had taken off his sash so his white tights left little room to the imagination.

“Josh told me I should ruin your day further,” Jake said with a cheeky smile that quickly fell when he saw the situation on top of Sam’s head.

“How the hell did you do that?” he asked with genuine curiosity, pointing a finger at Sam’s scalp.

“Ask Josh, I’m sure he was behind this,” Sam grumbled.

“He definitely bribed the costume department to have you put that on, but you’re the one who got it all tangled up on your head. Were you breakdancing with it on or something?”

“Are you gonna help me or not?” Sam deadpanned back at his brother. If he wasn’t going to extend a hand, Sam was more than prepared to kick him and his tight pants out of his trailer.

Jake came closer to Sam, which Sam slightly recoiled at, and closely studied his head.

“Mind if I take a stab at it?” he asked. Before Sam could respond that he could as long as he was gentle, Jake planted his bare feet firmly into the tiled floor and grabbed onto the fabric as if it was a ledge he was hanging on for dear life. Sam let out a small gasp and winced, bracing himself for the pain that was inevitably going to happen. While Jake probably had telekinetic powers with Josh through their magic twin powers, he most definitely lacked that psychic connection with Sam as he gave a large yank on the fabric.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Danny tried to step in as Jake wound up to give another pull. Sam could feel heavy tears forming in his eyes, which were squeezed shut because he didn’t want to see what Jake was doing, or frankly those pants up close. His scalp was burning from the strength behind Jake’s tug and he was certain that Jake had successfully ripped a solid clump of hair from his head so he probably looked like he had male pattern baldness. Just his luck.

“It just needs a little coaxing out, that’s all,” Jake replied with determination.

“Usually you don’t coax something out with that much force,” Danny retorted.

Sam felt Jake winding up for a second pull and quickly slapped his hands away from his head to make sure he didn’t lose any more hair than he could help. With a sigh, he opened back his eyes and wiped away some loose tears.

“I’ll keep the stupid thing on for the shoot.”

“What? I almost got it off,” Jake protested.

“No you didn’t,” Danny said. “I think you were enjoying that a little bit too much.”

Sam stood from the couch and flattened the fabric back over his head and down his neck so he looked like a glittery airpod again. Without saying another word, he flung open the door to the trailer, hopped down its steps, and headed for set. Jake and Danny shared an uncertain glance and then followed behind him.

“Can you please put the sash back on?” Danny asked.

“I’ll put it on when I want to,” Jake replied.

As Sam walked closer to the studio, he tried his best to hold a level of confidence that made him look less like a fool. He figured that runway models constantly had to wear dumb shit that made them look like clowns, but somehow they always made it work. It was all about confidence, and Sam was going to make sure that no strange looks or laughs behind his back would tear him down. He was going to own the hell out of his stupid headpiece and make sure that Josh hated every second of it.

“Ah, the man of the hour!” Josh greeted him the second he stepped foot inside. “You kept the headpiece! I must say, you look absolutely stunning, Sammy, like a beautiful metal rod.”

“Not as great as you, Glinda,” Sammy tried his best to poke fun at Josh’s massive sleeves. He despised that Josh didn’t look as ridiculous as he should have in such an odd costume. Sure, it didn’t compare to what Sam was wearing, but he wanted to feel some level of comfort that he wouldn’t stand out on screen as the easiest target to become a meme. Josh gave him a smirk and shook his head with a laugh.

“Glinda? Nice one. I guess I do kinda look like her, huh?”

Danny and Jake made their way onto the set, Jake with his sash back on, and approached Sam and Josh. Danny was wearing a complex chain link headpiece that looked straight out of a Knight fashion catalog and Jake had added another metallic looking scarf around his head.

“It’s out of solidarity,” he explained to Sam with a small smile on his lips. “It’s not really fair if you can’t take yours off, at least right now.”

Josh at first looked frustrated with his band members but his frown changed to a laugh as he studied Danny and Jake longer.

“Those were my canned test runs for Sammy’s wardrobe,” he explained.

“That’s what we figured,” Jake said. “We found them in the dumpster on our way over.”

Sam gave a sniff around Danny and let out a gag.

“I think we look good,” Danny said over Sam’s dry heaving. “I’m getting some serious Medieval vibes.”

“I look like I should be reading people's fortunes,” Jake commented. Then, he turned to Josh. “You look like you could be the leader of a cult.”

“Good,” Josh nodded his head. “That’s what I was going for.”

Jake rolled his eyes with a chuckle and headed off to grab his acoustic guitar. Josh mumbled something about gluing back on one of the rhinestones that had fallen from beneath his eyes and wandered back towards the trailers. Sam, while breathing out of his mouth so he couldn’t smell the dumpster headpiece, leaned into Danny’s side and gave his back a pat.

“Thanks for the solidarity.”

“It’s the least I can do after letting Jake tug at your head like that.”

“That’s right, I was gonna ask a PA for some ibuprofen.”

“But hey, seriously, you don’t look that bad. I’ve seen a lot worse in music videos.”

“Oh yeah?” Sam grinned at Danny. “Like what?”

As Danny fumbled for an answer since he frankly wasn’t prepared to be asked that on the spot, Sam let out his first laugh of the day, gave Danny one more hearty pat, and then went to get some painkillers for his raging headache Jake had caused.

After that mission had been accomplished, Sam retreated back to his organ and tugged on a black suit jacket that was left strewn on his seat. His gut told him it was a truce from Josh, signaling that he no longer had to look like the tin man on camera. As touched as he was by his older brother’s gesture, he was even happier when the director announced that their first shot would be brief before a costume change. So sure, there would be some photographic evidence of his headpiece, but it would be minimal. He could live with that.

“I bartered with Matt to take a solid break after he gets a few shots in so you can actually get that thing off your head,” Jake told Sam as he stepped onto the sound stage. “It looks unbelievably uncomfortable.”

“You’re not wrong there,” Sam nodded back at Jake. “I can’t wait to get this off.”

“I’ll bet. Matt mostly agreed because he told me I need to take a shower,” Jake said.

“I might need some help taking this thing off too,” Danny said as he approached his drums. “I’m a little bit worried that it hasn’t slipped off my head yet.”

“Maybe we’ll be rocking some monk haircuts soon,” Sam chirped.

“Ooh, that could be our new look,” Danny sounded excited. “We’ll really embrace the middle-aged rocker aesthetic. That way people will stop criticizing us for trying too hard to be like the older guys. With bald spots, they’ll just assume we are the old guys.”

“It’s absolutely fool-proof,” Sam agreed.

“If that’s the direction we’re going in, I’m starting my solo career early,” Jake said.

“We should do butt rock,” Danny said over Jake.

“Yes, absolutely yes,” Sam clapped. “Nothing but Staind and Nickelback covers.”

“Do you think Josh can do the butt rock voice?”

“I think he has it in him.”

“You two are unbelievable,” Jake shook his head. Sam and Danny finally snapped out of their daydreaming and laughed at Jake’s disbelief.

“Go off on your solo career and watch as Greta Van Fleet’s butt rock era absolutely obliterates you in the charts,” Sam chirped.

“What’s that about a solo career?” Josh joined the group. “Who’s dipping?”

“No one, just theoretically Jake would leave the group if we started doing butt rock.”

“What the hell is butt rock?”

“Cameras are ready to roll!” Matt, their director, announced from behind the wall of equipment facing the sound stage.

“You will explain butt rock to me later,” Josh pointed between Jake, Sam, and Danny before turning on his heel to find his spot in the front of the stage. Sam adjusted his headpiece one more time before realizing it was a wasted effort, and turned back to face his keys.

“Just a few takes,” he whispered to himself.

It really wasn’t that bad. A large camera pushed on a dolly circled them a few times as they played along to their pre-recorded track. Sam tried to avoid looking into the lense and instead focused on engulfing himself in the music and trying not to laugh at Josh’s attempts to embody Freddie Mercury. They ran through the song three times and then the blinding lights dimmed and Matt called for their much-anticipated break. Sam tapped on a set PA’s shoulder and mumbled his problem to her, which she quickly met with a promise that she would find someone to give him a hand.

So, soon Sam found someone from the hair and makeup department knocking on his trailer door, armed with a brush and pair of scissors.

“The scissors are a last resort,” she was quick to explain after seeing Sam’s concerned stare. “We shouldn’t need them.”

Danny, Jake, and Josh were all inside the trailer with Sam, mostly for emotional support, but also because it was the most interesting thing happening on set. They cleared some space for the hair lady, Deborah, to work her magic, and watched in fascination as she went to work on Sam’s head.

“Oh wow,” she ticked as she reached the crown of his head. “This is a mean knot.”

She fumbled around with the sequins inside the fabric for a bit, freeing a few strands of Sam’s chocolate hair so it fell in front of his eyes. He brushed them away and continued to stare down at his bare feet as Deborah continued on. She was eventually able to release more hair after a solid period of hacking at it with a comb, so the fabric was hanging by one last clump. Sam breathed out a sigh of relief that his bandmates echoed. Watching Deborah work on his hair made them all realize how much of an asset his locks were to the band; they needed to get it insured or they’d be screwed.

Deborah started to sift through the last chunk of hair stuck in the fabric and was evidently struggling as her motions with the comb got more aggressive and panicked. Sam’s eyes were closed again as he took the force but finally he held up a hand to stop Deborah.

“What’s going on up there?”

“I’ve almost got it all out, you’ve just got one clump that’s like a bird’s nest.”

“Cut it,” Sam replied.

“What?” the entire trailer asked.

“Cut it,” Sam repeated himself with a shrug. “If it’s nearly off I don’t want to deal with it anymore. Hair grows back, it shouldn’t be that noticeable.”

“Are you sure?” Deborah asked, wearily eyeing the scissors she had brought on a whim. “Your hair’s gonna be a little bit choppy on top.”

“I don’t care,” Sam lied.

“Can I cut it?” Jake asked from the couch.

“No,” Sam and Deborah both told him.

“Bummer,” Jake mumbled.

“Go for it before I change my mind,” Sam told Deborah, handing her the scissors.

“I can’t watch,” Danny groaned out, whipping his head away from Sam so fast a part of his chain link headpiece slapped Josh in the face, which he rubbed in pain.

Deborah was nervous to butcher the young bassist’s hair because she knew how big of a deal it was from all of the reference photos she had been given of the band prior to shooting. She knew he had told her to do it, but she was still terrified that she would get sacked if anyone found out what she did. As she pondered this, she stood frozen in place, her scissors dangling from her fingertips. Sam looked back to see that the hairdresser was apparently buffering over his request and let out a sigh, snatching the scissors from her. Before anyone could do anything to stop him, Sam positioned himself in front of the trailer’s mirror, located the last knot and, in two hurried snips, fully freed his head.

A couple of bang-length hairs fell in front of his eyes, which he blew out of the way in triumph, chucking the headpiece straight out the window with a call of glee.

“Finally,” he sighed. Deborah looked terrified as he returned to her and handed back the scissors.

“You cut that a lot shorter than I was going to,” she said.

“You weren’t gonna cut it, I could see how freaked out you were,” Sam corrected her.

“At least let me clean it up a bit in my trailer,” she asked.

Sam was more than willing to agree. Before Deborah led him away, Danny stood from his place on the couch and happily gave Sam’s fully exposed, bald-patch-free head a ruffle. Jake and Josh stood to join them and studied Sam closely, trying to gauge if he was mad or not. In all fairness, Sam wasn’t thrilled about his current hair, but it was infinitely better than the fabric situation, so he was going to run with the positive emotions.

“I got bangs,” was the best thing he could think to say to his stunned bandmates.

“You’re gonna have to learn how to style them,” Jake commented. He spoke from experience, after the mistake he had drunkenly made back in 2018 to give himself choppy side bangs that only ever got in the way.

“That’s what I’m here for,” Deborah said, leading Sam out from the trailer.

Deborah was good at her job, and she made the right call when she opted to slick Sam’s shortened hair back with a generous amount of gel. With it back, you couldn’t even tell how uneven things looked. Sam was more than happy with her work, and was beyond thrilled when he returned to his trailer and saw that his costume change consisted of a comfier looking white suit and stunning face mask made of diamonds. He knew for a fact that he was going to pull off his next outfit so well, he would be giving people gender envy for decades to come.

“Do you like it?” Josh asked from the doorway, watching Sam smile at the clothes.

“Are you kidding?” Sam turned to his brother. “It’s great.”

“Good,” Josh looked relieved. “I didn’t realize that stupid headpiece had sequins on the inside. I did want to take the piss out of you, but that went too far.”

“I gotta agree with you there,” Sam said.

“I thought this combination would make you look like you belong in Vogue.”

“Vogue will definitely want me after they see me in this.”

This made Josh flash his signature pearly whites and slap the doorframe of the trailer.

“Great, that’s great. Well, I’ll see you back out on set soon.”

“See ya,” Sam waved before returning to his new clothes.

“Oh, one more thing,” Josh said, turning back around. Sam raised an eyebrow at him.

“Apparently Danny’s chain link headpiece got caught in his hair too. Deborah’s helping him out now.”

Sam craned his neck and could swear he heard Danny calling out in pain in the trailer over. As he listened closer, he thought he heard Deborah telling him she was almost done, and that she would never work on a set again that involved pointless headpieces. As eager as Sam was to change, he made his way to Danny’s trailer and, sure enough, Deborah was hunched over the top of his head, thrusting the same comb into Danny’s curly locks. Danny had his teeth clenched and was white knuckling his chair but, when he saw Sam, he forced out a smile.

“I guess I couldn’t let you be the only one to experience this today,” he said before letting out another shout as Deborah freed some more hair in a triumphant swipe of the comb.

“How bad is it?” Sam asked, stepping closer to Danny.

“Bad,” Deborah grumbled.

“It’s not that bad,” Danny tried to protest before screaming out in pain as Deborah combed out another clump of hair from the chains.

“Nearly there,” she said under her breath.

“Can I just shake my head?” Danny asked. “It should fall off, right?”

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” Deborah gave Danny a testing glance. Danny didn’t seem to hear her because he started to violently head bang, as if he was listening to a Staind song. Deborah at first called out in shock at Danny’s sudden actions, and Sam winced, but within a matter of seconds, the headpiece had flung off Danny’s head, straight out the window of his trailer. Outside a set PA screeched in pain.

“Not one hair cut,” Danny grinned. “Sorry, Sam.”

“It’s all good,” Sam shook his head with a smile.

“Oh god,” Deborah groaned behind them. They turned to face her and saw that she was holding another jeweled headpiece that, while it looked less complicated than the chain link one, still seemed like trouble. “You’re supposed to wear this next.”

“Aw man,” Danny frowned. “Why did they think that would be a good idea?”

“I’m putting so much hair spray in your hair, it’s gonna feel like uncooked spaghetti,” Deborah decided after weighing her options.

“Go for it,” Danny agreed, following her out to the hair and makeup trailer.

Sam watched him go, relieved that Danny hadn’t gone through the full extent of the pains he had endured over the course of the day. He hurried back to his trailer and threw on his suit, which was something he would absolutely wear during one of their shows. Carefully he set the mask on top of his head, making sure none of his gelled down hair got in the way, and centered himself in front of the mirror.

“Much, much better,” he smiled at his reflection.

“Lookin good!” Jake said through the window. Sam peered outside and saw that Jake was still in his tights and sash, but he was now wearing a large white hat.

“You’re not changing?” Sam asked out the window.

“I can’t get the tights off,” Jake called back.

“Seriously?”

“Nah, I’m kidding. They’re so comfy, I bartered with the costume department to let me keep them on. They said that it made their job a lot easier.”

“This is gonna be one weird music video.”

“I think our Age of Machine one was weirder, honestly.”

“Oh yeah, I’m still haunted by those shots of Josh riding the motorcycle.”

“Hey, no matter how stupid you look in this music video, nothing will beat Josh on the motorcycle.”

#greta van fleet #gvf #gvf fanfiction #sam kiszka #jake kiszka #josh kiszka #danny wagner #heat above #fanfic

[legendssaga]

The Sacrifices we made

I wrote this for @jainadurron, and we both want the people who keep saying that "Han wasn't as sad about Anakin as he was about Chewie" to take a hint and understand this very basic concept of his character that Denning established in Star by Star. Now sit down and read what might be, admittedly, my very last fic on the "Solos grieving Anakin" trope.

27 ABY  - Before

Bad. Mentally, Han Solo prepared for the worst. It surely hadn’t been the first time Anakin got injured on an adventure - he could still vividly recall the horror he had experienced when Luke mentioned the boy had come face to face with a Krayt Dragon, and yet, this time it was different. This time he came face to face with enemies even trained Jedi Master Luke has had trouble defeating. Enemies he, the twins, and a bunch of other Jedi trainees tried defeating in their home arena, with help and support outside the small strike team virtually nonexistent - and he had seen in the solemn expressions of the other Jedi that the strike team had already faced several losses within the first day of their mission.

He wondered how the twins were faring at this very moment. The three of them together, supporting and protecting one another, was what kept Han remotely sane: as long as they had each other, they would make it out somehow, because they always had. 

Nonetheless, he was undoubtedly on edge, readying his ship for - he didn’t know what for, but he was preparing for any sort of potential crazy maneuver, even though he rationally knew the kids had to fight their way back - it had been in a one way trip, and any rescue from an outside-point would only get the wanna-be supporters killed.

He heard a tiny voice in his mind whisper “then why did you let them go?” and gritted his teeth. "Because I know they’ll come back." 

Or did he? He’d thought the same about Chewbacca, yet here he was - with Leia as his copilot, and a hole in his heart that could never be filled.

He refused to think about how much deeper a loss of his children would cut, as even just the existing possibility rendered him paralyzed from terror, and he didn’t like the thought.

Parents don’t outlive their children, especially not their Jedi children.

Han Solo might not trust the Force, but he decided to trust his gut on this.

27 ABY - After

Han found himself appreciating and regretting his previous naivety all at once. He looked down, finding Leia curled up at his side, where persistent tear streaks had wettened the fabric of the blanket he’d wrapped her in. Their evening had been horrendous, to say the least, and the only thing that had eased Leia’s anguish and made her calm enough to take the first proper breath in hours, was the medication the medical droid had eventually slipped her. Meanwhile, Lando had offered to take care of little Ben for the time being, and Han appreciated the sentiment, although it did have the nasty side effect of leaving him alone with his thoughts and feelings - or the lack thereof, with an ache so incomprehensibly deep and scarring that it didn’t quite fully reach his consciousness. Instead, ever since he’d settled Leia to sleep, the most solid evidence of his heartache was the void growing inside him, and the tears that streamed down his face no matter how much he had tried blinking them away. Eventually, he just let them be, realizing the act was in vain.

He pulled himself up, stumbling from their sleeping quarters down into the main area to look for something to drink, overcome by a sudden urge to simply down a bottle of Lando’s finest brandy until he could just forget - spent another precious minutes with the hopeful thought of reunification with Anakin, and the cocky security that as long as the kids had each other, everything would be fine.

But then, the sight of the bottle left him nauseated and mortified. Each and everything had started with his wish to drown the truth. Maybe, if he hadn’t done it, if he’d acted like the adult he was supposed to be - maybe Anakin wouldn’t have been so eager to settle things himself, make amends for his failures- failures which had never existed, which had only ever been imprinted on him by Han’s utter inability to handle his pain.

And Anakin had paid the price.

Noticing his vision blurr, Han barely managed to reach for the sink, spending the next few minutes trying to catch his own breath between sobs. It was apparent that the universe had made a mistake, and he had no idea how to fix it. He couldn’t go back, not to Sernpidal, not even a few days back, pending the votes in favor of a reckless mission. A reckless mission that could cost not just Anakin’s, but the twins’ life, too, because he knew no matter how much they might fight, and how preoccupied they’d been in recent days with other things, the twins had always loved and feverishly protected their little brother. He didn’t dare imagining the kind of scenario that could’ve ever led to this gruesome twist of destiny. 

Catching a break when his thoughts started swirling so violently that he failed to make sense of them any longer, Han found himself mindlessly filling a cup of water, drinking it, and then drowning in a mixture of a sob and a laugh when he reflected that the empty cup was a perfect representation of how he felt inside.

He filled it once more, then managed to settle on the couch, fingers tracing the rim of the glass. It reminded him dearly of the time when the kids were young, hidden away on Anoth on one of Luke’s very many hunches that turned out to be a well-considered but needless measure of protection, robbing him and Leia of precious hours with them. Would Luke have made the suggestion if he had known how little time they actually had? How many good-night stories had been delivered by Winter or Threepio, rather than him and Leia? How many chances of snuggling on the couch and watching a silly holo-drama? It was nothing he ever dreamed of wanting, and now his mind itched to have relaxed family nights in an ordinary home among ordinary people over an adventure on any day. They had pulled the kids into this, hadn’t they? By the way they had been brought up, he should’ve expected them to be roaming around digging their head into one mess at a time. Just that he, Leia and Luke, however bruised, injured or frozen they’d ended up, always clawed their way back to life. He never saw the glass flying, but he surely heard the impact when it shattered on the durasteel wall, breaking into a dozen little pieces. Some of them he knew he could repair. Some of them were large enough to be picked up and perhaps, with enough time and effort, be pieced back together. Others, however, smaller pieces, those that had shattered into crystalline fragments, invisible to the naked eye, would forever remain imprinted in the material, virtually lost to the world, a reminder of a present that had ceased existing.

Somehow, Han found it within himself to get up and look for Leia, scolding himself for how his grief-driven rage could’ve woken her up - she deserved the bliss of night for a little longer, even if the heartache would return as early as the new morning, when a happy dream would be ripped apart by reality. He leaned against the doorframe, wiping his eyes, marveling at the strength with which she had carried herself through her whole life, and how she’d managed to carry him through shared pain after they had lost Chewie, as if the weight had lasted any less on her own shoulders.

This was his burden to carry now, and he knew of the price he was paying. He knew of the holo-journalists and passerbys, old friends and acquaintances, maybe people closer to him, those who should know better, who hopefully would know better… better than to assume he swallowed his grief because he ached any less than his wife. He swallowed it, for it threatened to consume him otherwise, and Leia couldn’t handle yet another loss. Their relationship and marriage had started on the wrong foot, and he aimed to get the record straight, even if that meant suffering his loss in silence for as long as it would need to pick up all the lost pieces, and rebuilt something that resembled an ironic, misfortunate new “normalcy”, while he’d always yearn for what was lost in the process. There was one soothing thing about it, at least: from the bottom of his heart right to the top, Han knew it’s what Anakin would have wanted him to do. And that was motivation enough to keep going. But not tonight.

Tonight, he’d sit on the old couch in utter darkness and silence, contemplating all everything that was meant to be and never took place. Questioning whether the twins were alright, whether they’d return home to them. Questioning whether Anakin had to suffer in his final moments, or if at least, with a cynical gruesomeness, the Force had granted him some mercy. There was no way of knowing. There was only hope.

#han solo #leia organa solo #anakin solo #star wars expanded universe #star wars legends #randomlegendsthoughts

[ordinaryschmuck]

Quick Thoughts on Ant-Man and the  Wasp: Quantumania

...Really?

This one?

THIS was the worst Marvel movie yet?

The one that was so insultingly bad that it caused people to throw fits on Twitter and scream off the top of their lungs about how Marvel is dead?

...Well, maybe I just have bad tastes, because I had fun.

Now, that does NOT mean I think this movie is the best Marvel has or that I don’t understand why people might not get into it.

The pacing is NOT that great. We spend, like, fifteen minutes on Earth before it’s RIGHT into the Quantum Realm. This is the problem that most MCU movies and shows have nowadays where there’s never enough time to really DIVE DEEP into the lives of the characters and what they’ve been up to before getting right into the action. Now, I don’t usually mind it sometimes, like with Spider-Man: No Way Home, Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings, or Moon Knight, but I WOULD love some time to slow down. Especially in this case because once the adventure starts, we have to fly by so much because there’s, oddly enough, not enough time to get through it all. Things like Janet’s life, Scott and Cassie’s relationship, and even Kang’s history has to be sped along to reach that two hour mark. It’s weird, a common complaint fans have is that the MCU shows have too much fluff amongst the interesting stuff where it feels like their movies don’t have enough.

As for the characters...they could have been handled better. Specifically Cassie who has very little character to her. They tried, building up how she’s this super smart person who wants to help a lot of people, but her performance and direction is NOT that great. It really hurts a lot of what COULD have been a good character if she just...did a better job? Or the director did a better job? I don’t know who’s at fault her, but it’s definitely SOMEONE.

And then there’s the Pyms, who get sidelined HARD in this. Janet at least has a few stuff to do and Hank at least comes back with a pretty cool “turn your brain off” moment, but despite this movie having Ant-Man AND THE WASP in the title, Wasp does so little in this. Granted, it means there’s less Evangeline Lily, but it’s still weird how little of a part she plays in this one. You can...kind of write her out and little would change, which is...crazy to me.

Then there’s the usual stuff people are getting sick of. The jokes...aren’t the best. I laughed at a few of them, but this is a movie that’s trying to be an epic superhero movie with Ant-Man’s level of humor and absurdity. It causes this sort of battle between two tones, fighting for dominance of what kind of movie this should be, and it hurts the film considerably.

As for the CGI...it’s a mixed bag. On the one hand, you have these pretty interesting looking characters and a world that leaves your mouth agape as you’re seeing it all...and then you have MODOK...Who looks so bad that whenever we see his face, I had to restrain myself from laughing in theaters. But honest to goodness, it’s just MODOK and a handful of scenes that don’t look that great. There’s honestly a few pretty amazing usage of special effects that really looked cool to see more times than not for me.

And since we’re getting into the good stuff, let’s talk about what actually works in this movie.

Because the Quantum Realm look amazing. Not perfect ALL the time, but there’s still some pretty cool stuff.

Kang, The Conqueror makes this worth watching. Jonathon Majors does a FANTASTIC performance, even if this wasn’t the best villain out there. He’s still threatening a lot of the time and there are great scenes that got my heart pumping due to how intense he makes them. Even if it does hurt a bit that he was having trouble fighting ANT-MAN of all people, the movie also makes it clear that he’s a bit of a reject, so I guess it makes a little sense. And, not to give away spoilers, but it’s clear that Jonathon Majors is going to have a lot of work cut out for him in the future.

As for Ant-Man...I still love him. He’s one of my favorite characters in the MCU because of how much of a normal guy he is, and that’s more or less the same here. The funniest jokes involve him in some way, and I’m giving credit to Paul Rudd for that. The dude can be pretty funny.

With that said, this is the movie that tries its best to make Ant-Man serious and...they certainly try. Now, in some cases it works, but there’s scenes, specifically in the climax, where all he does is say corny and cliche dialogue all in the attempt to make himself sound badass. I want to get into it, but Ant-Man really does work best when he’s just...a dude. Still, I’m grateful for the effort.

Finally, there’s MODOK...Who--And I’m not pulling any legs here--is my favorite character in the movie. He looks dumb as SHIT, but I adore how deranged and detached from reality he acts, especially near the end. He cracks me up so much that it reminds me that it reminds me that, “Yeah, this movie’s fun.”

Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania is not that great of a film. I can easily see people not getting into it, but for me, it’s a fun watch. And it’s nowhere NEAR the worst Marvel movie. Have you seen Morbius, Fant4stic, or Howard the Duck? I haven’t. They looks so awful that I REFUSE to see it.

Hell, this isn’t even the worst thing in the MCU. Have you seen Inhumans? Because I have. It’s so awful that I don’t EVER want to see it again. But with Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania...I just might.

Consider this one a guilty pleasure for me because while it’s not that great, it’s nowhere near as bad either.

Watch more movies if you disagree.

#ant man and the wasp: quantumania #ant-man #scott lang #kang the conqueror #modok #mcu modok #paul rudd #jonathon majors #quick thoughts #what i thought about

[suvarnarekha]

I have always kind of wondered as to why is it that when Good people die early, in rather painful ways aswell, why is it that God doesn’t interfere? Yesterday, I read about the infamous Junko Furata case after having avoided it for the longest time because I fall weak to these things (same reason I didn’t watch the Kashmir files), and let me tell you something, it was a big mistake, like, a HUGE one. I lost it completely. At first, I thought that even if her wrongdoers didn’t get their due, they will get it in the the world that comes after this one. But then, I thought, why does it have to come to justice? Why doesn’t god save innocent people to begin with? A person’s mind is there biggest enemy at times. I spiralled bad. I overthought for so long I got headache. I know god exists: my own experiences account for that, so why does he let people suffer? I looked for answers everywhere, bothered my parents quite a bit, and they were beyond annoyed because I spiral thinking of things that no human being (who isn’t already on a higher spiritual ground, anyway) can answer, it only leads to headaches and anxiety. At first they told me its Karma, but ofcourse my mind was not ready to accept that there’s any karma out there bad enough to warrant that. They were worried for me, because my overthinking had actually landed me in hospital once, so I don’t blame them for when they got angry at me this time. My father gave me the example of Abhimanyu: how he was not only innocent, but Krishna’s own nephew aswell. He could’ve saved him, but Abhimanyu died a painful death still, in front of his father’s eyes. That this was Vidhi ka Vidhan, and that it was meant for him. I had been thinking about this issue since yesterday (albiet I hid that I was still thinking about it today) and felt demotivated all day, until the Abhimanyu example came to me again. This time, I thought about it hard, like really considered it, and suddenly, a lot of things opened up to me: Did Krishna not save Draupadi when she called for him? Not save Lakshman by stopping the sun from rising? Not save Prahlad from Holika? Did Mahadeva not save the rishi who composed Mahamrityunjaya mantra? Was this not Vidhi ka Vidhan? Why did Vidhata save them? I was troubled and needed answers, so I searched Abhimanyu up. And I found something unexpected. Abhimanyu is actually the son of Soma, who needed to go to Earth, but since Soma couldn’t allow him to be away from himself for so long, he had the gods promise that Abhimanyu will be returned after 16 years. Suddenly, I felt a lot less troubled. I remembered that all of Bhishma’s brothers before him, and Krishna’s except for Balram died aswell, for the same reason, and that made me think, what if all the people we lose along the way, all those whose tragedy becomes inspiration for us to stop future events, what if they are just heavenly souls sent on earth to guide us and facilitate justice? Abhimanyu, despite the fact that he was meant to die, was still avenged and got justice, so the fact that god gives us justice nevertheless is a given, isn’t it? All of this, it made me realise something: when tragedy strikes, we take the name of our believed god, and everything gets better eventually. We thank him and feel assured that he’s always their for us, even through our worst. He has always saved us, and he forever will. This lord has defied vidhi ka vidhan for all those who called, and he will always do that. But when someone falls to the monsters in our everyday world, we shouldn’t feel like God did this, because it was the doing of these animals on earth that walk among us.

Why it happened to those people? Its something we don’t understand, was it Karma of past lives? Were they just wayward souls who were sent here for the purpose of bringing such people to justice? I don’t know, and I won’t ever know. This is one of those questions that people can’t answer, unless they are someone like a guru who has reached beyond human intelligence. Dwelling on this will just make you lose your sanity one day, so better not do that to yourself. We don’t know why these things happen, but we do know that one day, in some world, justice will happen, and the victim will see it happen in front of their own eyes. I’m just leaving this out here for people to read because I don’t want anyone going through the same kind of mental hell that I did in the past couple of days. I hope that those who suffer from the same mental prison read this and can reassure themselves. That being said, I also hope that the angel that was Junko Furata gets to see her criminals face Karma one day, because I know that the court that comes after this life shows no mercy🙏🏼

It was a tiring day today, and I was happy as well as bashing some people for making most of my week feel like hell. When I read one of your first sentences on Junko Furata, I took a deep breath and remembered everyone who experienced a similar fate as her. Everyone whom we fight for 2-3 days on social media, and raise our voices against the disgusting oppression they faced.

And your dilemma is not something unusual. It's infact quite widespread. But many of us won't dig further into knowing the answers because we're too scared. Too scared to face the reality.

But inspite of being under such circumstances, you fought for clues, for hints. You dug deeper. And that's a metaphor of every fighter who ever, for even a split second, tried to find an answer in this enigmatic world.

People like you, them, and bygones inspire us. To know how some answers do exist, they're just out of our reach.

People say oppression is not a competition. It's true. But thinking about all these bygones, just makes me fill so guilty, so remorseful. I think I don't owe them anything, but maybe I do.

When tragedy strikes, we take the name of our believed god, and everything gets better eventually. We thank him and feel assured that he's always their for us, even through our worst. He has always saved us, and he forever will. This lord has defied vidhi ka vidhan for all those who called, and he will always do that. But when someone falls to the monsters in our everyday world, we shouldn't feel like God did this, because it was the doing of these animals on earth that walk among us.

This brought tears to my eyes. Not the good or bad ones, but the ones that sprung me to reality,

With the belief that nature will restore the balance, and the justice will be served.

[sweetestofchaos]

Dang it, I hate the heat. Also don't mind me talking in asks is just very fun lmao.

I wish my life outside of Tumblr was happening too but everything feels like it's at a standstill so I totally feel you hating the silence. I almost had to fight my impulsive urge to leave Tumblr the other day because of how awfully silent it felt, even though it wasn't like that. I do have a few wonderful people here that I interact with, you included. It's just the writing slump that was making me sooo grumpy.

Also shite the heat absolutely sucks. We've been the same issue in our area when on the worst heatwave days, there are constant electricity outages to the point they absolutely drive you mad. I randomly started crying a few weeks back when electricity went out in the middle of the night for like 10th time in a row and I had a pretty big uni entrance test to take. Also I'm so sorry you are going through that and I am so incredibly proud of you for keeping that gorgeous smile on even through all this trouble.

Also, just so you know, I am somehow always lurking around silently lol so you can hit me up anytime, anyday. ILYSM STAY STRONG ALRIGHT? Also, shut uuuup, if I'm flying to hang out with you, the heat don't matter no nada

I completely get where every thing feels like it’s at a stand still! I’m in the same boat and when I try to get things moving it’s like ‘nope, nice try.’

Having the lils keeps me on 100 at all times, so even when I’m feeling bad I can’t really let it show too much. I’m trying to have this power issue fixed by the end of the day. But having to wait around on other people is pushing it into tomorrow it looks like.

I am extremely grateful for the handful of people that do interact with me. They are just really sweet souls that never fail to put a smile on my face. I’m working my way through my reading list since I’m taking a break from writing for the month of July. I have a lot to catch up on, so I’m excited to share the reviews.

I think so far this summer the most I’ve done is take the lils to Hershey Park and a fair which they enjoyed a lot. I hope I’ll get a job soon enough. I miss being more independent and being able to do more for my kids. But like I said, life is playing around.

I am trying my best to stay strong 💪🏽 I’m sure shit will work out once I make a few more moves 🤞🏽

I will be sure to hit you up more often! I am so bad at reaching out but ya know what they say. Communication goes both ways. And ily! You would really deal with this hellish heat for me 🥹 five gold stars for you!! There is a really cute water park type thing by my place, so we can stay cool! And I’ll make brownies or cake…or honestly whatever you want ☺️

Chill (chaos)

#soc asks #soc answers #kiara my 💚

[corniebooks]

Babel by R. F. Kuang

Time to share my thoughts on this book. 2/5

Okay, I knew this was a dark academia book and thus I knew it would have at least one secret society, a terrible betrayal, and a not so happy ending. It hits all these beats, but it failed to reach its full potential by dragging on, not fully thinking through the worldbuilding implications of certain events, and failing at characterization.

First off, I love the magic system. I loved learning tidbits about linguistics. I think it was a creative way to demystify the economics of the time it takes place that incorporates why they needed silver and why they were exploiting different cultures. It does its explaining well, but it also falls apart with a little more thinking (like why did they still use silver as money? They would clearly have stopped using silver as money as soon as they found its magical properties in order to better hoard the magic and prevent other places from potentially using it).

Now to dive further into the critiques, starting with it took too long to go places. There were many important pieces before getting to Oxford, but then there were lots of other non-important pieces. This can work if the atmosphere makes it engaging, but when the atmosphere is boring, it’s boring. Then we get to Oxford and it is explained as this mystical and wonderful place when it really isn’t that much different from how he was raised. We spend way too long getting to know the other people in the house compared to their importance in the narrative. And the worst offense is that we don’t get to use the magic?

Literally, they are going to school for magic and officially they aren’t allowed to touch a silver bar until the year before they graduate??? This also falls apart in the worldbuilding because the silver bars have to be recharged and with the number of faculty and people able and allowed to do the magic, the faculty would be run ragged. Especially the new and exciting Chinese-English pairs where only one professor and one adjunct knew Chinese. Like how was that working? Why didn’t they have undergrads running around charging bars for their keep? With how the main conflict at the end worked, there should have been more people working in Babel or be some other system of maintaining the silver bars.

I loved the friend group of the four Babel students in Robin’s year. The way their dynamic as friends worked was amazing, but as soon as you throw in the secret society it doesn’t make any sense.

Robin is portrayed as afraid to stir things up. He’s never done anything to cause trouble. When he first runs into the Hermes society, he helps them due to this social anxiety and curiosity about his brother. Then we are supposed to believe that one argument with his patron/father is going to have him decide to commit to tasks he doesn’t even know? (Also passed the deadline set, just a minor pet peeve about continuity). This is completely out of his personality and throws you out of the story. It was upsetting as a reader and I was not able to let go of it, instead my mind was trying to pick when he would’ve been ready to join.

What’s frustrating is that his brother seems knowledgeable enough about people to be able to coax Robin into doing small tasks that seem inconsequential before revealing he is in too deep so he might as well officially join. Ramy and Victoire should’ve joined a lot earlier and been in on the trying to convince Robin to join. They should’ve been the deciding factor. Chickening out was the most in-character thing he did related to the secret society and that still could’ve happened after he takes forever to join.

Very spoilery from here on out.

The next bad characterization was the chapters by the other characters (Victoire is the only one that feels like it works because she is the last one surviving and so it continues the narrative). The Ramy chapter was unnecessary. The Letty chapter destroyed the suspension of disbelief around the betrayal. Before Letty’s chapter, I was fully invested. I was feeling “how could she?! But also yeah she would.” Then her chapter prattles on about things that make me question everything about the betrayal. Like her personality is not one to tattle tail (which is a big deal), like she would much rather disappear and pretend it never happened. Then it was talking about no one taking her serious for being a woman, which then had me thinking “how did she get the police to come so quickly?” So that by the end of her chapter the betrayal felt contrived for narrative purposes instead of natural. A book is part magic and when you explain the trick before I’m able to fully experience my wonder, it doesn’t feel magical.

My last pet peeve is the “moral of the story”. It’s dark academia, it’s supposed to be a tragedy. But it really emphasizes the colonizing beliefs of nobody will help you fight oppression except people more oppressed than you, collective action is futile, striking is terrorism, you can only trust yourself. It’s one thing when the character believes this lie, it’s another thing entirely when it seems like the narrative is built on the idea that this is true. And maybe the intent was that this was all Robin’s fault for believing the lies, but the narrative didn’t show that his ending was because of those beliefs. It strongly felt like he was doomed by the narrative from the beginning (without quite landing either).

Yeah, I’m 100% the person who would’ve preferred a story where Robin learns to trust others and collective action works (and they do a real strike instead of committing a terrorist act by threatening people with death if they don’t let you take over the building). I love happy endings, but the lack of a happy ending was not what made me dislike this book.

What are other people’s thoughts on Babel?

#Babel #booklr #r f kuang #book review #bookblr

[wardogxicarus]

Any outwardly, unprofessional reactions Shale made would go by without a comment. Pierce made careful note of them, as he did with all things, but he allowed his fellow commander the grace of peace and quiet in regards to her trauma. The mad man had hurt her especially and in some of the worst ways imaginable during their war; There was no way Pierce, or anyone, could bring up Achim around her without stirring up some kind of reaction. So it was on them, on Pierce, to let things go by quietly and keep the focus on the conversation at hand, and not the horrors of yesterday.

"I agree with you on shutting things down now, while we still can, because I know Silas warned Achim to keep away from Dennis but he clearly isn't listening anymore. And we can't afford to go at war about this either." Not because Dennis wasn't worth it, not in his mind at least, but because there simply wasn't enough supply or manpower to orchestrate that sort of thing. "But..." Pierce shrugs, trying to buy some time and think of a tactful way of laying out his idea. "All he wants right now is Oron, and Oron's made more than enough trouble with us by attacking innocent people for no reason other than he got a little angry about something."

He looked directly at Shale, meeting her eyes and giving her a fair chance to connect the dots for herself. "I understand he's your friend and that he's reached out to make amends with you. But I personally don't trust him anymore to not do something else that'll hurt us, hurt our families, or just hurt somebody because they looked at him wrong while he was having a bad day. So, I think we should kill two birds with one stone, and lead Achim to Oron."

As soon as Pierce brought up the incident(s) that precipitated their falling out with Oron, she knew what was coming. Part of her felt immense guilt at the idea of throwing him to the wolves so soon after granting him a chance at redemption. It also felt wrong to 'sacrifice' anyone to that monster. What if he did something far worse to Oron than his alternate had done to her?

Still.... it might the be appeasement MECH needs...

"My trust hasn't been returned to Oron yet... but is it right to essentially make a blood sacrifice?" Shale paused for a fleeting moment. "MECH is above that. Even... if that route would make the most sense in terms of immediate results..." Where there any other options? Part of her was thinking there wasn't.

#anotherhumanpet #| guest muse | shale