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#idk why i just could not get into the novel for some reason

petitesmafia · 5 months

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one thing i found out being in the bsd fandom is that quite a bit of ppl have read and enjoy crime and punishment...one of my friends was talking to me about it and i was like i gotta be real with you i sparknotes that novel in grade 10 English and never looked back

#personal #i just recall thinking it was such a long book in hs #we used to have tests and my teacher would ask the most specific details about certain chapters just to make sure we were reading it #her ass def knew i was not reading LOL #which was funny bc i read a lot in hs #idk why i just could not get into the novel for some reason #i should try properly reading it sometime

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youngyoo-apologist · 15 days

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I think my least favorite thing ever of all time is when I’m reading a fanfic and Basen and Lily are villains like NO my children would NEVER

It’s usually the case in OG Cale fanfic, now don’t get me wrong I love the guy but also his family was not all horrible, and Basen and Lily were NEVERRRR at fault. Lily is literally like, seven years old and Basen is fifteen neither of them hate their brother either. Any child wouldn’t know how to approach their older brother who doesn’t talk to them and is distant(+ is known for having a bad personality) like that isn’t their fault 😭😭

OG Cale distanced himself from his siblings to protect them, there’s no one to fault in this situation for things turning out this way because it happened due to so many combining circumstances. Like IDK! I just don’t like it when Lily and Basen are treated like bad people cause I just find it a bit ridiculous.

Basen and Lily could’ve tried talking to OG Cale, but the real question is if he would let them talk to him ykwim, his act was perfect with literally no flaws. The reason it worked so well was because no one KNEW him and he probably knew that part too. The sadness to their situation is that they all had their reasons and cared for eachother but there wasn’t really any communication

Tbh it should have been Deruth’s job to ask Cale what was wrong, he’s not like the worst father ever okay but he also has extreme communication issues! The Henituse’s middle name is practically ‘communication issues’ like none of them are very good at it I fear. Deruth clearly cares for his son a lot, but he doesn’t know how to approach Cale possibly out of guilt/fear he’ll hurt his son even more. Which is why he just let’s Cale do what he wants

I think it’s important to note that the family did have faith in Cale, they all knew he wasn’t a bad person but they were all just so distant from eachother. I don’t think Deruth would have offered KRS!Cale to go to the capital after like a weeks worth of changed behavior unless he knew that there was more to his son than what the public thought. Again I think the big issue with the Henituse family is their communication

The characters all have complicated dynamics and personalities and it’s just something I don’t like when everything is treated very one dimensional

#rambling #tcf #lcf #Violan could have asked Cale what was wrong too but like she has more reasons not to #like she could be distancing herself cause she thinks that’s what Cale wants #and she watches over him and makes sure he’s okay in other ways #I just think it should be Deruth to talk to OG Cale abt his mom’s death #Violan defender 4ever #I don’t hate Deruth btw he’s cool I guess but he needs to communicate better #actually I wonder abt Violan and Deruth’s marriage a lot #like why did they get married so fast (according to the wiki timeline)#I had this theory that it was an arranged marriage they set up for some buisness reason and fell in love later #cause I was thinking abt it and I thought it just didn’t match up w their personalities #Deruth was literally so devestated after Jour died I do not think he can fall in love that quickly again #maybe I’m wrong idk #it’s been awhile since I read the later half of the novel maybe the reason they got married is explained later

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lizardlicks · 3 months

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You know that walrus vs fairies thing is a really good example of suspension of disbelief and how poor writing can immediately ruin it.

Further, it's a good example of how propaganda and indoctrination can be broken.

Check this out: if you are asked to believe something by a person who presents themselves as an authority about a subject in which you have little to no experience, you have no ground to question them on. Even if it seems fake, human brains are really good about going, "that doesn't sound right, but I don't know enough about [thing] to dispute that." We have to specifically train ourselves to stop and go do our own research. And if it's a big, complicated topic which you're brand new to, that's really intimidating!

This is a feature rather than a bug of being a social species. Collectively, we store far more knowledge than anyone if us could store individually. It means that even if you have never seen a walrus in your life, you can be reasonably confident that you still "know" that they're large, tusked, aquatic mammals which tend to favor colder water and they don't really go farther inland than a couple miles.

It also means that you are primed to accept new information on a subject with which you have little to no direct experience: e.g. fairies are real, you just didn't know that until now.

Propaganda and indoctrination work because they're presented as authoritative sources on subjects that the target audience doesn't have much experience with. That also means those can be combatted by research and first hand experience. Multiple times I've seen posts from people who climbed out of the weeds of Q Anon because one of those secret info drops started making claims about subjects that the person was something of an expert in: electricity, infrastructure, medicine, engineering.

It's also why you can get so into reading a great fantasy or sci-fi novel that has otherwise stellar writing and world crafting, then suddenly get kicked right out of it again when the author, say, has a character fall into a convenient, non-magical coma for a month, or they start walking on a bad fracture after a couple of days without some fancy technological assistance. You have a body, and you might not be a doctor, but you can know enough to understand that's not how bodies generally work, and if the author has not previously established that their characters aren't human and work totally differently, a pall of doubt and frustration taints everything that comes there after.

Idk where I'm going with this. I just think it's neat! Definitely something to keep in mind when trying to effectively communicate with people, regardless of if you're trying to educate or simply entertain.

#lizard is starting to ramble

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annes-andromeda · 6 months

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Wish Rewrite

I have this tendency for rewriting material I either don’t like or think had wasted potential. At the time of writing this, Wish hasn’t come out in theaters but I did pirate it as there was an early screening. I also read the junior novelization and bought the concept art book. Needless to say, I was disappointed by what I read/saw.

I feel like Wish could’ve been better. Granted, the story and characters are not terrible, but they certainly leave much to be desired. This is literally Disney’s 100th anniversary, yet it doesn’t really feel like it. Not only that, but the movie felt incredibly rushed. Yeah I know that most Disney movies try have a run time of 90-100+ minutes, but I think a few more minutes could’ve been added to this film.

So, I decided to indulge myself and outline some changes that I think could’ve made the story slightly better. These ideas are by no means perfect, and in the end, this is all in good fun.

Spoilers ahead btw

The main story of Wish is essentially that Asha wants to get a job as Magnifico’s apprentice so that her grandfather’s wish is granted. But Asha finds out about the King’s true nature, and after questioning him, doesn’t get the job, and Magnifico vows to never grant Sabino or Sakina’s wishes.

Asha makes a wish on a star, and the star comes down, Magnifico tries to hunt down the two of them, he uses an evil spell book to create a staff, Magnifico destroys some wishes, Asha gets help from her friends, they sing a song to defeat Magnifico (I ‘wish’ i was joking), Star gives Asha a magic wand, and all is well.

Oh, and Amaya is… there.

It’s nothing complex, pretty cut and dry. And I don’t have a problem with a simple story! But this feels like it’s… missing something.

Firstly, I’d change the title. Disney already has a boat called Wish, and not every movie needs to be one word like Tangled, Frozen, and Brave (amongst others), so the story could be renamed “Asha and the Wishing Star” or “Asha and the Kingdom of Wishes”. Idk, something that evokes a classic fairytale book feel (or that does confuse people with a boat).

((Side note #1: I honestly enjoy that the story started off with a book, as a nod to classic disney movies, especially Snow White. That was cute))

Secondly, and I know I sound like a broken record at this point…

AMAYA👏🏼SHOULDVE👏🏼BEEN👏🏼A👏🏼VILLAIN👏🏼ALONGSIDE👏🏼HER👏🏼HUSBAND👏🏼

The original plan, according to the concept art book, was to have Magnifico and Amaya to be a villain couple who were partners in crime and owned a black sphinx cat named Charo. However for… reasons, the creators took the ‘safe’ route and made Amaya the good one out of the two.

But the problem is, by erasing Amaya’s evilness, the creators of Wish essentially removed any purpose or personality she may have had and thus, she was left to become a literal ‘supporting’ character. First supporting both Magnifico and Asha, then leaving Magnifico to prop up solely Asha.

Deadass, you can literally remove Amaya from the story and nothing would change. Which is probably why she was exempt from much of the promotional stuff minus the dolls. Because she literally serves no purpose but to be… there.

So, in my version of Wish, Amaya would be a co-conspirator to her husband and yes, I’m adding Charo too. Her personality would be inspired by classic female villains such as the Evil Queen from Snow White, Lady Tremaine from Cinderella, and Maleficent from Sleeping Beauty.

Vain, glamorous, cunning, and unabashedly evil, Amaya would be the Morticia to Magnifico’s Gomez, the brains to his brawn. She’s the girlboss, he’s the wife instigator. Magnifico spoils Amaya rotten with countless gifts and praises, whilst Amaya is the more calm and collected evil compared to her husband’s ever-growing temper.

While she starts the story with no magic, Magnifico just can’t leave his wife hanging and shares the power of the evil spell-book with Amaya. And yes, even Charo gets in on the fun, turning from a small house cat, to a massive shape-shifting beast who breaths blue fire similarly to a dragon (shut up i think it’d be cool)

Magnifico and Amaya essentially keep the wishes of Rosas locked in the castle as a form of obedience. By giving the citizens false hope, it makes them more dependent on the royal couple, and the two have more power over everyone.

Anyways, let’s get to the main characters: Asha and Star.

I don’t have much of an issue with Asha’s character, more so her design. I already made a post showing my redesign of her, so that’s out of the way. Tbh tho, I also have an issue with the rest of the costume design of Wish, being a big costume nerd myself. The movie’s supposed to take inspiration from the Mediterranean, primarily places such as Spain and Morocco (and the Amazigh people for Asha), but the fashion feels like generic European medieval fashion.

I feel like the whole storyline of Asha’s interview with Magnifico was pretty pointless, so I would have it that she just starts off as the kings apprentice, whilst also working as Amaya’s scullery maid.

The couple took Asha in when the girl lost her father at the age of 12 (according to the film), and she’s been working for them for five years. Asha works not only to support herself, her family, and her community, but also as a way to distract from the grief of losing her father. Which is no issue, as Amaya always bombards the girl with chores, and Magnifico only teaches Asha the most basic of magic for fear of her growing more powerful than him.

I made Asha work as a scullery maid not only as a reference to princesses such as Snow White and Cinderella starting off their respective stories as maids, but also because scullery maids acted as assistants to the kitchen maids. Dahlia works in the kitchen, Asha and Dahlia are best friends, I figured it made sense.

But anyways, on the day of Sabino’s 100th birthday, Sakina tells Asha to take a break and return home, as she hardly visits anymore due to work. Asha says she’ll try asking the king and queen to get off early, but that she can’t make any promises.

Asha meets with Magnifico and asks for the day off, but the king refuses. However, wanting to keep her loyalty, Magnifico finally shows Asha the wish chamber, and even allows her to witness the wish ceremony that night. But once Asha starts questioning the king on his methods, any goodwill between them begins to fade.

Another thing I’m disappointed in, is that originally Star was going to be a shapeshifting humanoid inspired by the Genie and Peter Pan, and may have even had a romance with Asha. But, the idea was scrapped for the more cutesy, ‘marketable’, version of Star.

In my retelling, I’d choose to do this human shapeshifter version of Star, but I’d name him something else. The star Earendel was mentioned in the concept art book, which is the farthest known star from Earth and not only means ‘morning star’ in Old English, but is also named after the Tolkien character, Eärendil.

I would call this shapeshifter Star Earen, and because Disney loves their animal/cute sidekicks, Earen can have the ‘Kirby’ Star as a companion, just like how Asha has Valentino and Magnifico and Amaya have Charo.

((Side #2: Anybody else notice that Star lowkey looks and sounds like Kirby😶))

Earen and Star journey down to Rosas once they hear Asha’s pleas for guidance. Once Asha tells of Magnifico and Amaya’s lies, Earen reveals that he actually met Magnifico decades ago. The amount of years shocks Asha, as she realizes that the King and Queen might be far older than what they are.

((Side note #3: I didn’t realize this till someone mentioned it, but if Sabino is 100 and he gave Magnifico his wish at 18, then he’s been waiting 82 years for his wish to be granted. Which means it’s likely that Magnifico might be immortal. That, or Disney didn’t think this shit through (most likely)))

Anyways, Earen actually attempted to stop Magnifico and Amaya’s ploy to keep the wishes of Rosas locked away, but he was sealed within the heavens until he and Star heard Asha make her wish.

We can have it that the king and queen spun the story so that Earen was made out to be an evil that once threatened Rosas, but Magnifico banished him and saved everyone, essentially making himself out to be the good guy and manipulating the narrative.

Asha and Earen must now work together to expose the lies of the royal couple, and along the way, the two begin to fall in love. Earen disguises himself as a peasant boy so as to remain inconspicuous, while Asha tries to go about her job as if nothing happened, evading the King and Queen’s suspicions.

Star gives Asha a stick infused with stardust once finding out she is, quite literally, the sorcerers apprentice. It is also so that she may defend herself, as Earen has his powers and a sword (similarly to Peter Pan).

Unlike Magnifico, Earen and Star teach Asha the wonders of magic and the potential she wields, showing that there is no need for her to hold back when her gift can help so many, including those she loves.

The three manage to sneak into the kings study, but only have time to retrieve Sabino’s wish and return it to him. However, Magnifico and Amaya, now strengthened by the powers of dark magic, find Asha and Earen and threaten to destroy all the wishes should Earen not surrender to them.

And as a way to ensure that Asha doesn’t foil their plans, Magnifico destroys both Asha and Sakina’s wishes, despite Asha not being eighteen yet. However, the evil magic allows him to do so. This act weakens the two women, and infuriates Earen.

Earen then willingly complies despite Asha’s opposition, and Sabino takes Asha and Sabina to the seven (well six) teens for aid, who are in hiding after Simon ratted them out and who now serves as a puppet to the king and queen.

Despite loosing her wish, Asha finds the strength to carry on through the memory of her late father, enlisting the help of her friends and Star, who managed to evade the royal couple’s grasp. The team must work together to save Earen, whose power will be drained by Magnifico and Amaya. And if such a feat were to happen, then Earen would die and Rosas would be lost.

The five teens go into the woods to distract one of the royals, with the aid of the forest fauna and Star. Amaya chases the group alongside Charo while Magnifico tortures Earen and begins stealing his power. With the help of Dahlia, Asha sneaks into the castle to confront her former mentor and save Earen before it’s too late.

At first, it seems that the heroes have the upper hand with Magnifico neutralized, but then, Amaya swoops in riding Charo, who now takes the form of a giant dragon. Earen transforms into a dragon himself and battles Charo and Amaya, while Asha continues battling Magnifico. Star even comes to help after the original plan fails.

However, the unholy trio have the upper hand, and Amaya strikes down Earen, giving Magnifico enough time to not only drain Earen’s power, but to trap Star within his staff. With their combined powers, Magnifico and Amaya gather all of the peoples wishes, even stealing the wishes of those not yet of age, which includes the teens.

With all the wishes gathered, the couple and their pet destroy all the wishes, taking their energy for themselves.

Asha falls into despair as she watched her friends, love ones, and community succumb to the grief of loosing their wishes. The king and queen force Asha to apologize to the people, mocking her and making her feel even more guilty.

However, Earen comforts Asha despite his weak state, telling her it’s alright and that she shouldn’t be ashamed of wishing on Star, as he brought the two of them together. The two kiss, the strength of their newfound love and hope shining through the darkness and inspiring the people of Rosas to rise up.

As the sky and stars become alive, Magnifico’s staff is destroyed, releasing Star in the process. All the evil magic he, Amaya, and Charo used is sucked out of them and vanquished, and Earen is restored to full vitality.

Think of this as the transformation scene from Princess and the Frog. Asha and Earen get new outfits, with Asha even gaining a crown and a new wand from Star.

((Side Note #4: The “transformation” in the finale of the film is so stupid. Asha could’ve literally gotten a new dress once she becomes a fairy godmother, but instead, Star just made her sparkly. How magical🙄))

Rosas rejoices, as they realize they don’t need the king to make their wishes come true, and they can pursue them themselves. With Magnífico and Amaya banished from Rosas, Asha and Earen become the new rulers, being names Prince and Princess respectively.

And that’s basically how I would’ve done Wish. It’s not perfect, but it’s just an idea. I’m just disappointed that Disney do something better for their 100th anniversary.

#disney #my writing #disney wish #wish 2023 #king magnifico #queen amaya #magnifico x amaya #princess asha #asha wish #star wish

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applejuicebegood · 1 month

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Hi gorgeous!! I haven’t gotten a chance to respond to your message about jason x booknerd!reader, but I wanted to quickly message and tell you that I’ve read it and I’m absolutely in love! You literally always come up with such good ideas, idk how you do it!! You’re awesome and ily!!

-(@midnightorchids)

Jason with a Bookworm!S/O

A/N: I know school has started back up for you again babe, so I don't blame you :((( I was originally planning to expand this for you, hopefully you can read this during a study break or some down time (i might repeat some stuff - just look away). It's IB exam season where I am so I share in your pain. Hang in there dude!! Summer is almost here!!

Masterlist

He's a vintage paperback and leather-bound kinda guy. Crime, Sci-Fi, historical-fiction/romance, magical-realism, and non-fiction are his go-to genres. Favourite authors include; Margret Atwood, Kurt Vonnegut, Haruki Murakami, Frank Herbert, and probably M.T Anderson. He's only a little pretentious about it.

He can spend hours in used book stores digging through the big plastic bins and stuffed cardboard boxes. You help him find specific authors or titles, your basket heavy with your combined finds. He'll carry the bags back to your apartment, his other hand tucked into yours as you gush about excited you are to sort and organise your new additions to your shared library.

He still has some books that Bruce and Alfred gave hm before his murder. Leather bond additions of the Liliad and rare printings of Dracula and Frankenstein. They have these little notes left in the front pages from Bruce that he couldn't bring himself to tear out or throw away entirely. And if you thought his home library was huge- wait until you see the book shelves in his old room.

Since he doesn't spend that much money on himself, he now has every chance to spoil you with your own special additions of your favourite stand-alone's, expensive book-marks, and lavish coffee dates where both of you enjoy your books over the smoothest of richest of espresso.

In the early months of your relationship, most of your dates were spent at bookstores, thrift-shops, and libraries. Your love quite literally grew from the yellowed, torn pages your would both get lost in.

Once his home library combined with yours, most of your bedroom and living room wall space became covered with his floor to ceiling bookshelves. Your bedside tables would each have a small stack of books that you were currently reading.

He absolutely loves how you look with your reading glasses. He thinks it's too cute when you push them up with the back of your hand, entirely focused on an intense passage. Your eyes going wide or your breath stopping at a beautiful line. Your adorable focused stare and sweet round cheeks are accentuated fully. He should be reading the book in his own lap but he's entirely distracted by you. You shut the book with a thump and immediately turn to him to gush about the chapter you just finished only to have his hands catch your jaw and bring your smiling lips against his. And suddenly, you forgot what you were going to say to him.

Jason finds lines and prose in his books that remind him of you and highlight them. He would keep them in a note stack on his phone, just to read them back to remind himself of your beauty. It's something that he could never put into words himself, hence one of the reasons why he adores reading so much. He can find the right order of words that properly express his infinite adoration and care for you.

I've explored this before but you guys have a set date once a month where you'll sit in each-others arms and just read all day. You'll curl up in one of his sweaters with one of your thick Sanderson novels and he'll tuck a blanket around his lap with his special addition of 'Little Women' open in his lap. He'll refill your tea mug because it's always hard to pull you out of your book during your reading days.

You'll order in some warm comfort food for supper and talk about your books respectively. He'll gush about how Jo March is such a revolutionary character and how Amy is actually a metaphor for the loss of innocence girls experience when attempting to emulate patriarchal standards of womanhood.

All while you gaze lovingly back into his eyes, your chin resting on your palm - wondering if a marriage proposal would be too sudden for your evening conversation.

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redbleedingrose · 9 months

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Girl Dad!Rhysand x Reader Headcanons

This male could pound me to town and I would say thank you.

A/N: Anyway, this Highkey sucks so I am so sorry. I feel like I have to ease back into writing, it has been so long since I have sat down and actually written something. It is all over the place and just not the best writing so I apologize for that. I just… my surgery rotation literally killed me. You can ask @augustinerose I was not in a good headspace. I feel like I am still recovering from that and idk… it just… I feel like it stole some part of me. I dunno, its hard to explain but it took out all the motivation I had towards writing. So easing back into things is gonna have to be the way to go. Again, I am so sorry, this is literally awful. I am gonna try to do some NSFW headcanons for girl dad!Rhys tomorrow if y’all would like. As always, a comment or reblog is much much appreciated. It always gives me the motivation and hope to continue writing.

Girl dad Rhysand is too good y’all I cannot.

Rhysand is one of the best girl dads out there.

He makes sure his baby girl and wife are taken care of to the fullest extent.

I am talking he wakes up in the middle of the night to take care of the babe, swaying her and humming Illyrian rhymes to her to calm her. He takes her out for flying, making sure to wrap her sensitive tiny wings in wool so that they can remain warm against the night court breeze whenever she is inconsolable, usually returning with her fast asleep, sucking on her tiny thumb with little grunts every so often.

The first month of the babe being home, he would sneak out of your bed just to lay down next to the crib so he could make sure that your darling babe was settled and comfortable.

He is a mother hen, glaring at Cassian for making too much noise when the babe is resting in his arms.

He likes to show her the constellations in the sky, pointing out each of the different stars and even using his powers to create mini galaxies above the crib. For her 5th birthday, he gifts her an actual star out of the sky, following the nickname, “my shining star.”

He adores her so much, there is nothing he wouldn’t do for her. She has him wrapped around her tiny fingers since the moment she grabbed onto his finger with her tiny fist. He loves reading stories to her, making sure that the nursery is filled with old children tales that are centuries old, first edition novels really, along with all of the new writings from the authors around each court. One sure fire way of calming down your babe whenever she is fussy is Rhys pulling out a book and resting back in the rocking chair with her in his arms, and reading to her the stories. He does all the different voices for different characters and even makes funny faces for your little girl to keep her entertained, and is the reason why your babe grows up to be an avid reader.

Rhysand always has the best clothes made for her. She is the best dressed babe in all of the courts, and grows up to be a fashion icon. Most of the clothes she wears are from Rhys’ mother who sewed them centuries before, just like she had for you.

He is the one to teach her how to fly, spending hours and hours, weeks and weeks away from his duties to spend some time with his favorite girl (besides you ofc) to teach her different skills. He teaches her self defense and different battle strategies, preparing her to become High Lady one day. He is patient and calm throughout the entire process, even when she throws tantrums or feels like giving up. He always knows exactly what to say, he knows exactly how to handle the situation by either giving her space or pushing her to keep going.

Your daughter loves to draw, and will often end up drawing on Rhysand’s arms and legs with a pink marker. He thinks it is the best artwork he has ever seen, and has gone as far as getting a drawing of a family of stars that she drew tattooed into left wrist.

At parties, he always makes sure to dance with her first. At first, he has her in his arms, twirling them both around while her little giggles and squeals resound against the music. Eventually, he has her standing on his shoes so he can guide the both of them, letting her grow with independence. Eventually, she learns the dance moves herself, and still to this day, they will be each others first dance.

Don’t even get me started on how girl dad Rhys takes care of you!!!!!

Literally the best husband and mate I am WEAK

This male screams self care. He wants to make sure that you are rested 24/7. No mate of his is going to be feeling exhausted. He has days where he schedules full body massages, facials, hair care treatments, manicures and pedicures. He has Morr meet you after so you can go browsing for new dresses, shoes, purses, jewelry. Whatever you wish for, it is already yours. You only need to stare for a second, and Morr is going inside to buy it, “Rhys told me to honey, you can talk to him, but honestly you deserve it” anytime you complain that she is spending too much on you.

When you come home, he has Az and Cass watching the babe for the night so he can take you out to dinner, or even just for an evening in. You cuddle up with the babe for a little while before he whisks you away into whatever extravagant things he has planned for you.

He loves having you in his lap during these free nights, one arm wrapped around your waist or hips while the other feeds you or plays with your hair, muttering to himself about how stunning you are, how lucky he is to have you, how much he adores you really.

I like to think you face each other in bed while he intertwines your legs and pulls you close into his chest, and you just get to talk about anything and everything. Any of his worries about the relations between other courts, any of his concerns regarding the night court, his desires to wanting to better the world for your daughter, he always feels like he can spill whatever he has on his mind to you in a way that he has never been able to before.

After your daughter is born, he often spends time telling her all of the things he thinks about while she lays on her belly and allows for her wings to flutter to build muscle strength.

Remember how I talked about your daughter being Rhys’ first dance? Well, you are his partner for every other dance, and always the last dance. Your poor babe is passed out in one of the chairs with Amren watching over her like a hawk, her hand patting the babes back (she has a soft spot for her, what can I say?) and you both dance and dance. Sometimes, he flys you up into the sky and dances with you among the stars, “they lie in witness to our love darling”

Again, this was terrible so thank you for sticking around if you actually read through this!

Edit: part 2

#rose rambles #acotar #acotar headcanons #Rhysand acotar #Rhysand x reader #girl dad #girl dad!Rhysand #Rhysand headcanons #Girl dad!Rhys x reader #Girl dad!Rhys

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its-in-the-woods · 15 days

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Down the Rabbit Hole Chapter 4

Chapter one here, two here, three here

Pairing: Walton Goggins x You

Rating/Warning: As always minor get out. Little angst, lots of fluff, handholding, vague suggestions of sex

Slow build like novel damn length okay, Very Fluffy, Pinch of Angst, Relationship Development, Hurt/Comfort, Older man/ Younger(30s) women, Alternative universe, fictional work (IDK WHY BUT I AM PUTTING IT) Probably more as I go.

Synopsis: Working in film as a make-up artist is hard enough, but then Walton Goggins requests you, well it's way too easy to fall down the rabbit hole.

Note: they are both single, all for fun.

WARNING I do not have this all written out, I do have it plotted out, but it may be a little slower for chapters to come out. Please bear with me. Each chapter is roughly 2-3k long.

*releasing this early as I have a few days of being free. Thank you for all the love <3*

Trevor apologized about seven times in text before phoning you and apologizing again. You tell him ten times that it is fine and you were more than okay. Which then leads to about five hundred questions about what happened between you and Walton. The man will not take ‘nothing happened’ for an answer.

“Trevor-Trev- oh-my-god could you shut up for one second,” You squeak into the phone, the man has not stopped talking since you picked up.

“You woke up in his house! In his bed-”

“It was a guest room!”

“Are you sure? Did you see another room?”

“You are impossible right now. It was a spare room.”

“But he made you breakfast!”

You groan into the phone. “Trevor-”

“Like does that count as a date? Did you go on a date?”

“We did not go on a date. We did not sleep together. The only reason he didn’t take me home is because you wouldn’t answer your phone and I was beating anyone who asked where I lived.” You rush out, trying unsuccessfully to persuade him from asking again.

“I give you mad props for beating on Leonard that man is a beast.”

You chuckle at that, Leonard looked like a cross between ex-military and Santa Clause. Thinking of yourself beating on him for touching you was hilariously ridiculous. The man was probably more inconvenienced than hurt.

“So when is your next date?”

“TREVOR! We are not dating.”

“Yet. You’re not dating yet. Very important.”

You groan and bang your phone against your forehead in frustration.

“And don’t tell me it’s because he is older than you. I know you like to date older men.”

“I should have never told you that. Biggest mistake I have ever made.”

“Dirty old man fucker.” Trevor is cackling away in the background like some James Bond villain.

“Oh my god Trevor. STAAP it.” You are also laughing, your damn friend was right.

“You love it, and I know all about it,” Trevor sings songs into the phone.

“What about you and Decon?” You ask, changing the subject as smoothly as you can. At this rate, your face was going to be permanently red.

“Oh. It was a wild night! I am looking forward to another one.” Trevor made some lewd noises.

“So gross, both of you. But I am very happy you’re happy.”

“I am over the moon,” Trevor is quiet for the first time, “He just treats me so well. I woke up and he was still there. Made sure I was comfy and took care of me”

“You’re so screwed.” You giggle, you had to give as good as you got.

“Mmm, actually yes I am. And you should try it sometime.”

You groan again, “Yeah maybe in the next lifetime.”

“Oh, pffts. I give you another two weeks and I will be catching you sneaking off to his trailer.”

“I am rolling my eyes. Can you imagine if Liz got a whiff of anything?”

“What would she do? Fire you? You can’t fire a lead request.”

“I am sure she’d find a way. Or make me regret ever being on the show.”

“Pfftts. She can eat a bag of dicks. Actually, she may need to.”

You both break out into laughter at that comment. The two of you talk back and forth for a good hour. Before Travis is off to Decon’s again, you make gross gagging noises at him. Telling him to enjoy the rest of his weekend and you’d see him on Monday.

You lay back on your bed staring up at your speckled ceiling, you had stuck up a handful of glowing stars to cover the water damage. Mind running over the weekend, running over the last month. You tell yourself that you’re delusional to think that Walton would ever be interested, but the thought is nice. The thought of going on dates, and well more, is delightful. Then again though, at the end of the day, you’re you. A thirty-something living in a studio apartment trying to break into a career that was over-saturated with a lot of talent. You rub your face, yep the picture of a prize.

***

You wake up early, determined not to let the sour mood you found yourself in over the weekend ruin this week. It’s a new day, anything is possible. Or something like that. You are already on the second cup of coffee, as your toast pops. Your phone jingles and you grab it to see who has decided to bother you this morning.

“Hey, it’s Walton. Trevor gave me your number. We are running behind. See you soon.” Of course, Trevor would give him your number. You grumble at that, also at yourself for failing to realize you’d never given Walton yours.

Your heart skips a little, you scold yourself for being ridiculous. “No problem, see you soon.”

“Do you want a coffee?”

“Yes, I’d love a coffee,”

“Same as usual?”

Now your face is pink as you stare at your phone screen. “Are you flipping fourteen again?” You say out loud to the room. “Stop this right now. You know better.” You curse and try to calm your damn heart.

“Yes please.” You text back.

You shake your head and finish eating your toast and grinning like a damn moron. Brushing your teeth, braiding your hair, and getting mostly looking human. It was a quarter to six in the damn morning anyway. If you were meant to look presentable this early you would have gone to bed earlier. Your phone buzzes reminding you that you need to get out of there.

Grabbing your phone and purse you head out the door. Do your best to suppress the butterflies as you all but skip down the hallway. No matter how much you try to tell yourself that nothing will come of this, your heart is overruling your brain. Down the three flights of stairs and yep your heart is pounding in your chest enough to feel like a panic attack. You stop just before the front door, you can see the blackout line of an SUV through the glazed window.

“Just go out there. It doesn’t matter what happens.” You take a deep breath. “And now you’re talking to yourself outside a door like a lunatic.”

Pushing through the door into the grey rainy early morning, you see Leonard standing beside the car with a small smile. The man reminds you of a Grandpa, big and gruff, but at the same time soft and kind. His arms folded across his chest, shoulder-length white beard blowing in the wind.

“Good morning Leonard, I heard I made quite the scene on Friday.” You smile as he opens the door for you.

“Just making sure you got home safe,” The man smiles, eyes hidden behind sunglasses.

“I would like to apologize, I definitely won’t make a habit of it.” You say, giving his arm a quick squeeze, as you get into the SUV. It was the least you could do, you’d have to ask Walton what the man liked to drink. A small token of thanks only seemed fair.

“Well, if you stay in my company it may become one,” Walton says with that damn smile gracing his face. He was wearing loose-fitting blank pants, a grey zipped-up jacket, and glasses as he read over the script in front of him.

“Promise, I’ve seen worse dear,” Leonard says before closing the door and getting into the driver’s seat.

You look at Walton and can’t help but smile back at him, “Who says I am going to hang out with you more.”

Walton chuckles, taking his glasses off to look at you, “We will have to see about that.”

You’re both sitting on opposite sides of a bench seat, but his hand finds yours and you don’t pull away. He talks about walking along the seawalls and a lazy Sunday spent indoors reading novels. You really wished you had been a bit more willing to spend the weekend with him. Somehow you end up telling him about your sketches and artwork. Your thoughts about one day doing prop creation, or maybe special effects. He asks about the sketches and you promise to bring one of your art books in.

The ride is way too quick, and before you know it you’re being dropped off at your trailer. You thank both men again for the ride and hop into the trailer.

Liz is sitting in your usual workspace, her face is a tight line that makes you feel sick. Why she was there was another question, the whole crew was supposed to three cities over setting up.

“Hey, Liz,” You say, trying not to sound like you just walked into a swamp full of alligators.

“Of all the people, I would have expected you to be the most professional.” Your heart thuds in your chest at the words, wondering what the hell she is talking about.

Sitting your bag down by your cupboard you turn to look at the women. “I am sorry?”

“You think people didn’t see you leaving with the leading actor on Friday?” The woman sneers at you, her voice low but full of venom.

You put two and two together suddenly realizing what Liz was talking about. For a moment you’re stunned by the fact that the rumor mill had run so fast and far. “He was just making sure I got home safe.”

“Oh give me a break.” The woman hisses, your heart pounding in your ears now. Chest tight making it hard to breathe. “No one is that stupid girl. I saw you get out of the his SUV”

Your face goes red and something inside of you snaps. “First. Do not speak to me like I am a child.” You're angry now, and you’re so over the bullshit. “Second, what happens in my personal life is none of your business.”

“You think it looks professional to be running around after some actor?” She spits back, and your mind races to the rumor Trevor had told you about.

“Well, it can’t be any less professional than you sleeping with half the production team.” The words come out of your mouth before you register them. It was only a rumor, but Trevor rarely dabbled in things that weren’t at least partially true.

“You little witch.” Liz’s face is now red and she looks hurt. Yep, Trevor had hit the nail on the head with that one. “I should fire you right now.”

You glare at her, all your inhibitions set aside, you know you have the upper hand here. “Go ahead, Liz. Fire me. See how well that goes over for you.”

Liz’s face clenches and you can tell you have her cornered. Yes, she could fire you and could make a big stink, but chances are the production won’t sanction it. Not to mention the union would have a fit. You would make sure of that. It wasn’t something you wanted to do, but damn, two could play at this game.

“You-” Liz hisses standing and moving toward you, but you refuse to move, letting the woman get up in your face. “I will be grabbing some of my product and leaving you for the rest of the week. I hope it goes well.”

She is gone with a blue tote a moment later. You are left standing in the middle of the trailer taken off guard. The fact that she’d come here, heard from a third party what had happened, and then decided to confront you. Part of you wants to cry and the other part wants to laugh. The most you’ve done with the man is hold his hand and everyone thinks you both were screwing over the weekend. You slide into your chair still a little baffled by the incident, not to mention that Liz would even suggest firing you. Your stomach rolls and you feel a little sick, tears now welling at the corner of your eyes.

The door opens and you expect Trevor but it's Walton. The smile on his face falls immediately as he sees you.

“What happened?” He asked, quickly shutting the door, placing a breakfast burrito and two coffees on your station.

You shake your head and tears fall from your eyes. Hands covering your mouth as a small sob comes out. The rollercoaster of a morning is finally getting to you. Walton is in front of you gathering you up in his arms. He is warm and gentle, you try not to let the emotions overflow but it's too late. Leaning against him you cry. He smelled like coffee and vanilla, his jacket was soft against your cheek. Strong arms holding you against him as all your feelings spill out. You let yourself cry for a moment before you steel yourself enough to pull back. He's handing you tissues and you plunk yourself back into the chair feeling worn out and dazed. Walton crouched in front of you eyebrows furrowed as you blew your nose. His hand landing gently on your knees as he comforts you.

“What's going on Hon?” He asks as he rubs a soothing hand over your knee.

“It's -” You falter, unsure of how to explain the absolute bullshit that just happened. “Liz was upset about me going out on Friday”

Walton looks even more confused. “Why would that matter?”

You rub your face trying to figure out how to say this. The amount of bullshit that happened was just ridiculous and you really didn’t want to drag him into it. Ultimately, you just say it cause there isn't a way around it.

“Someone saw the two of us leave together.” You swallow your mouth going dry. “Liz made assumptions and told me I was being unprofessional. She threatened to fire me.”

Walton stands grabs his coffee and takes a sip. “I am not sure how that is any of her business. You've been very professional, and being fired would be detrimental to the whole process. You are a key part of this team, and her sticking her nose in your business is more unprofessional ”

You just shrug, if you could go curl up in a ball for an hour you would. Just hide away, you can barely look at him. Shame hitting you at the fact you’d lost your cool over something so trivial.

“It was just unexpected. And very hurtful.” You wipe your eyes, cursing that you need to reapply to your eyeliner.

“Of course it was.” He comes back over and grabs your hand in his. They are always so warm. “You don't deserve to be spoken to like that. I am tempted to mention this to the PM.”

You shake your head looking at him finally. “It’s not the worst thing that's been said to me. Liz means well.”

Whether that was true or not was up in the air. Liz was a lot of things but she usually wasn’t unnecessarily cruel, which is why it had come off so shocking. The woman didn’t exactly have a way with words, but she had to have meant well.

“She means well?” He looks at you with eyebrows raised, his lips pressed into a firm line. Judging by his expression Walton didn’t believe that any more than you did.

You swallow, “I- I need to have thick skin to do this job. It's not easy and people are always going to look for ways to judge me or demean my work.”

Walton squeezed your hand, “That may be true. But it doesn't mean I have to like it.”

The door to the trailer opens as Trevor walks in. His eyes look between both of you and then down to where Walton is holding your hand.

“Uhh, I will go wait outside..” Trevor flushes trying unsuccessfully to back himself down the steps.

“No, it's okay.” You both say.

Trevor pauses. Then proceeds to come in. Walton rubs his thumb over your hand before letting go. You wish he would stay, but there really wasn’t time for any more sappiness.

“I am going to head over to costumes. They needed to do some alteration on a piece.” Walton says briskly grabbing his coffee and sliding the burrito across to you. He's out the door before you can say thank you.

Trevor is sitting there with a shit-eating grin, his feet dangling as he watches Walton go.

“So you aren't dating?” He chuckles, turning to lay out his tools.

You groan, looking in the mirror to fix your eyeliner and clean off some fallen mascara, “He was being kind. Liz was here this morning. Guess someone told her about me leaving with Walt on Friday.”

Trevor's smile fades as he looks at you, “Those milling bastards.”

“Yep. Liz was unimpressed and threatened to fire me.”

“She wouldn't.” He all but stomped his foot.

“Well, I am sure I will find out in the next few days.” You pray to whoever is up there that Liz would just leave it be.

“Liz is many things. But she isn't stupid. Firing you would be more of a problem than it's worth.” You knew Trevor was right, but it did sting a little.

“You're more than likely right. But it still hurts. Walton came in right after the argument and I will-” You look down at your feet remembering how upset he looked.

“Had a small breakdown?” Trevor added in, trying to look at you.

“Yeah. Snot and all” You sigh as you double-check that everything you need is out and clean.

“You should go out with him just to spit Liz.” He chuckles as he texts someone on his phone.

“If. And it's a big if. Trevor, I am going out with him. It's because we both want to. Not because of Liz.” You say firmly, that woman would not dictate your life.

Trevor looks up from his phone.”Two weeks, three weeks, top before you are making his trailer shake”

You make a face, “You're disgusting.”

“You like it!” Trevor smiles, and you do. It was part of his never-ending charm.

***

Chapter five

*So so much love to every one of you <3*

*If you want to be tagged in the next chapters please let me know*

#walton goggins #fallout #fanfic #creative writing #fan fiction #fanfiction #fantasy #au #alternate universe #domestic fluff #fluff #angst

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hxney-lemcn · 5 months

Text

Tea Errors — General! Jonathan Crane x gn! reader

summery: Harley tries to help reader to get with Jon. But when the reader mysteriously doesn't appear at work one day, Jon can't help but worry. What happens when he finds out they're in a hospital?

tw: Descriptions of injury and violence.

a/n: Idk why, but the rogues have been making me write damn novels compared to my other fics. My average has been like...3.7k words for them when normally its only 1k 😭 This fic is loosely inspired by these headcanons by @roguish-gallery

wc: 5.6k

Master List

(Read it on ao3 here)

“Wait…WHAT?!” Harley shouted, not caring how the other patrons glanced in our direction. Although once they realized it was Harley Quinn, they quickly went back to minding their own business.

I dropped my head to the table, feeling my body heat up with embarrassment. I knew that telling Harley a secret was like telling a middle aged housewife the neighborhood gossip. Which meant it won’t be a secret for long, but I’ve been keeping this secret for a long time. It was getting draining to hold these feelings in to myself and Harley was surprisingly one of the closest people in my life at the moment.

How? Well I was Jonathan Crane’s assistant. I helped him with anything he needed to take care of that he didn’t have time to oversee himself. It took me a long time to get into the position I have now, and over that time I found myself falling for him. Somehow. He was reclusive, quiet, and distant. Yet somehow that charmed me. His passion, albeit unique, spoke to me. Not many people were as passionate as he was about his research, and the fact that he never let any setbacks get to him was admirable. It’s one of the reasons why I wanted to help him so much.

Even more surprising was how Harley Quinn, the clown queen of crime, seemed to have a strange attachment to Dr. Crane. It was like a frenemy situation. Dr. Crane would always seem to have an air of distaste towards Harley when she was around, yet he would never kick her out or yell at her. Not that he was the shouting type. His threats towards her were surface level at worst, and he never scolded me for her somehow getting into his office.

Which led to us becoming friends. Whenever she deemed Dr. Crane to be worthy of her attention, she’d end up getting sidetracked when I actually would hold a conversation with her. I think Dr. Crane appreciated it as well, since he could actually focus on his toxins instead of making sure Harley didn’t accidentally gas herself…not like it would affect her.

Which led to the current situation. I confessed my hidden feelings for my boss to Harley Quinn. It was wrong on so many levels. It was unprofessional the way I felt about him, and not to mention that he was a criminal mastermind.

…well that second point never really mattered. I got over it the second I saw my first paycheck.

“I know,” I groaned into my arms. “It’s weird.”

“This is amazing!” She squealed, kicking her feet. “Y’know he’s always been a loner. I’ve just been waitin’ for someone to come along and sweep him off of his feet.”

Lifting my head, I stared blankly at her, “I don’t think I’ve swept anything but the floors.”

“Awe I don’t think that’s true,” She smirked, taking a sip of her obnoxiously bright drink. “Y’know he’s never had an assistant last as long as you have toots. Not to mention he seems ta really like ya. I mean he hasn’t made ya one of his test subjects yet.”

“Yet,” I pointed out, taking a sip of my drink.

Harley’s cherry red lips were held in a pout, “Don’t be such a party pooper. Besides! If he tries anything he’ll have to get through me!”

I couldn’t stop the small smile that formed on my lips at that statement. There were some perks to having villain friends. Harley may be crazy, but she was loyal. I’m lucky that I’m in her good graces.

“He’s got a soft spot for ya,” She said with a shrug, stirring her drink with her straw. “He’s just got his own way of showin’ it.”

Harley’s words continued to ring through my head the next day. I brewed some coffee while also checking the email for Dr. Crane. I hadn’t seen him come in yet, so he was either running late (unlikely), or he was already cooped up in his lab (very likely). In fact, it was likely that he hadn't even left it all night.

Seeing as none of the other rogues contacted Dr. Crane, I decided to check out the lab and make sure everything was in order. I’ve only been into the lab a couple of times. Dr. Crane didn’t like anyone entering, and the times I had been in there were to escort Harley out into his office instead. The lab is where he kept his most vile of fear toxin samples. Building off of his old works to create more potent toxins to warp Batman's mind.

I knocked on the door first, wanting to make sure I wasn’t intruding. When I didn’t hear anything, I cracked the door open, peering into the room. Tables are littered with burners, tubes, vials, flasks, pipettes, beakers and basically anything you could possibly need for creating toxins that drive people insane and possibly kill them. My eyes finally fell onto the brown haired scientist, slumped over the table with beakers surrounding him. Orange liquids filled some, others were a dark brown.

Taking a tentative step back, I shut the door as quietly as I could. I made quick work of grabbing the jacket I wore today and quietly slipped into the lab. I scooched the beakers back (keeping them in the same order) to give Crane some more space. I then gently placed my jacket over his shoulders, which made him stir, causing me to tense, only for him to continue his slumber. Carefully, I slid his glasses off his face so he could sleep a bit more comfortably. Folding the legs of his glasses, I placed them near his head.

I should wake him up. It was my job to make sure everything was in working order. Keep an eye on the goons, make sure transactions were upheld, and report any problems to Dr. Crane. Yet seeing how he tended to overwork himself, neglecting his needs, I could only hope that he won’t be too irritated at my decision. Double checking that the space was as safe as it could be, I left the lab. I was just glad he didn’t leave any burners on overnight.

A few hours later, Crane had entered what could only be described as the lobby. It wasn’t really a lobby, as no one came in and out of the hideout except for goons, but it held my desk. I was absorbed in my work, making sure that the next shipment of chemicals came in discreetly and without a hitch.

“I believe this is yours,” His low voice shocked me out of my trance. Looking away from the screen of my computer, I was met with his blue eyes staring back. With his lips barely uplifting into a smirk, Crane teased, “Didn’t mean to scare ya.”

“I’m sure you didn’t,” I teased back, taking my jacket back. “I hope you don’t mind that I let you sleep in.”

It was silent for a few seconds. A few agonizing seconds. His blue eyes felt like they were piercing through me, and I could only hope Harley was right about how Crane felt about me.

“I suppose I wouldn’t be able to properly make batches of my toxins if I were drowsy,” He muttered, pushing his round glasses up his nose. “Speaking of, are those chemicals going to be here today?”

“Yes, sir,” I nodded proudly. I always felt proud when I had good news to give him, even if he didn’t give me a reason to. “They’ll be in within the hour.”

With a nod, he excused himself and made his way into the makeshift breakroom.

…

“I wish I could help,” Harley pouted, holding her head up in her hand.

“You have no business getting into other people’s personal lives,” Ivy scolded, green eyes half lidded in a disapproving stare. “Besides, I doubt Crane has any interest in them outside of scaring them.”

My smile fell at that. Ivy was the clear headed one of the two. She kept Harley grounded while Harley helped Ivy let loose every once in a while. Ivy wasn’t really fond of me, though I didn’t blame her. She was weary of all strangers, and we’ve only talked a few times. The only reason being that I was a friend of Harley’s.

“You shoulda seen ‘im red!” Harley exclaimed, flapping her arms around wildly. “He was totes makin’ goo goo eyes' last time I visited.”

“I don’t even understand why you visit the old crow,” She grumbled, taking a sip of water.

“You wouldn’t get it,” Harley waved off. “And don’t listen to red toots. She’s just jealous that I’ve been payin’ more attention to your little love story than her.”

“You wish,” Ivy mumbled into her glass.

“Anyways,” Harley emphasized. “You gotta show him you're interested! But not over the top. He’s mentioned how he had students flirt with him to get better grades so that type ‘a flirtin’ don’t work for him.”

“What do you mean?” I asked, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“You gotta do somethin’ else,” She explained, twirling her hair. “Y’know, I think he’d really enjoy acts of service. Take care of him a little. Ooo, maybe some quality time.” She winked.

“And how the hell am I supposed to do that?” I asked, slumping over slightly. “Ask him on a date?” Ivy looked as disinterested as ever as Harley tapped her chin in thought.

“Uhhhhmmm,” Harley hummed. “Maybe start with something smaller. Take a break together, get to know each other better.”

I hummed, thinking it over. Harley was actually giving good advice. It wasn’t over the top or brash like it usually is. She must be closer to Crane than I thought.

“I’ll try,” I nodded. It seemed easy enough.

…

Boy was I wrong. It felt nearly impossible to pull Crane away from his work, and I honestly didn’t want to. He seemed close to a breakthrough and I didn’t want to distract him…I’m not sure if it would end well for me if I did. So I decided to focus on what I do best. Acts of service. I dropped by the lab, the room feeling less daunting every time I entered without Crane shooing me out. When his coffee was low, I’d refill his cup, when he hadn't eaten anything since the morning, I’d ask if he wanted any food or snacks.

It would be stupid to think that Crane hasn’t noticed my change in behavior. How I was providing him more aid than usual. How I started to focus on his needs more. I was just glad he didn’t bring it up, though he wasn’t the type to do that. It was a slow day today. No deals, no shipments, no rogues needing anything. So I was left to help Crane, whether it be cleaning his equipment or getting him another refill.

“Did you need anything else Dr. Crane?” I asked, watching him drop some chemicals into a flask, the chemicals bubbling as a reaction. “Perhaps you could use a small break.”

He paused for a second, rubbing his eyes. It was hard to ignore the purple under his eyes as it continued to grow darker by the day. I could only imagine the soreness he felt as he hunched over his equipment for hours. I felt a glimmer of hope that I managed to get to him.

“I reckon a break wouldn’t hurt,” He mumbled, pushing himself to stand up. A bright grin splashed across my face, feeling giddy that he actually listened. Shrugging off his lab coat, Crane exited the lab and I trailed behind him.

“Harley mentioned you tend to overwork yourself,” I spoke up. “But she didn’t need to tell me that since I witness it first hand almost everyday.”

“Yes,” Crane hummed, taking a seat in his office seat. It looked much more comfortable than the stool he used in the lab. “A bad habit. You’ve been talking to Harley?”

“Mhm,” I nodded, standing in front of his desk. I wasn’t fully sure if he wanted me there for his break, but the advice Harley gave rang through my head. “She’s been really nice to me. Inviting me to hang with her during her more laid-back outings…which never seem to stay that way. But I got to meet Ivy! But she doesn’t really like me, so I feel bad when I third wheel her and Harley.”

Crane quirked an eyebrow, but his reaction was as nonchalant as ever, “I wouldn’t feel too guilty, Ivy doesn’t really like anyone outside of Harley.”

“Yeah,” I shrugged, finally deciding to take a seat. “It’s nice to have friends. With my current career path and all, I didn't think I’d have any.”

A silence settled over us before Crane spoke up, “...I understand how the life of crime may be lonely.”

Even though I worked for a criminal, and I was surrounded by criminals, I always forget that I was now technically classified as a criminal. I had worked as a receptionist once when I was a teenager. A minimum wage job to give me some extra spending money. So working for Crane felt nostalgic almost. Even though I was in charge of stock, transactions, and the schedule for Crane…I never saw the aftermath. I could’ve been working for anyone with the tasks I kept, so it was easy for me to forget just how deep I was in if either Crane or I were caught.

“Well,” I trailed off, trying to gain the courage for what I wanted to say. “I hope my presence makes it just a little less lonely around here.”

Crane was cold, distant, reclusive. That didn’t mean he wasn’t human (even if he didn’t want to admit that). Loneliness was like a disease, once the feeling’s there, it’s hard to make it dissipate. It would slowly creep through you until it would fully consume you. Some people had a higher tolerance to it, others didn’t.

Crane seemed to be one of the few that was immune to the feeling. He, after all, never showed anything to prove contrary. Yet the hidden warmth that laid just behind his eyes screamed otherwise. Perhaps, his alias as Scarecrow was only one side of him. The side he wanted everyone to see, that he wanted everyone to cower to. But behind that mask, revealed an old man who was both tired and lonely. Perhaps a part of him craved that loneliness, I understood the need to be alone all too well, but it was clear he also craved a connection. For someone to see all of him, and to accept him for all his flaws and perfections.

“You’ve definitely livened the space up,” He replied, his eyes trailing to the plants I’ve added to his office. “...I do appreciate what you do…thank you.”

I stared at him in awe. The master of fear, a man renowned for bringing your worst fears to life, had given me praise. He had caused my heart rate to accelerate, but it wasn’t from fear.

…

“YES!” Harley cheered, pumping her fist in the air. “I better be the maid of honor.”

I let out a snort, “If it took this long for him to compliment me I think marriage is far, far in the future.”

“You don’t get it,” Harley grinned, bouncing in her seat. “He neva compliments anyone! He’s basically just confessed his undyin’ love for ya!”

Rolling my eyes, I couldn’t hide the amused grin that took over my lips. The idea of Doctor Jonathan Crane, the brooding workaholic scientist/terrorist professing his undying love was entertaining. A man who was a force to be reckoned with, being soft. The more I thought about it, the more I craved to witness such an event. To be someone he deems special.

The rest of the night went by smoothly. Or as smooth as it can get with Harley. She only busted one guy's ass after he tried to catcall her. So overall, a calm night. We parted ways eventually, and I seemed to have grown too comfortable in Gotham. I was surrounded by rogues! What did I have to fear when I worked with the most fearsome?

There’s nothing more fearsome than desperation. The terror that filled me at this moment was worse than my first day of working under Scarecrow! The man held a knife up to me, hands trembling as he ordered me to hand over my wallet and all other valuable items I may be carrying. I knew better than to fight. My wallet wasn’t worth more than my life. Though I was scared of what the man’s reaction will be when he realizes I don’t have anything of value. I may have been stupid enough to walk down the streets of Gotham without a buddy, but I was smart enough to keep valuables off of me.

I slowly took out my wallet, to make sure he knew I wasn’t a threat. But the man didn’t seem to be stable, whether he was coming down from a high, or was paranoid, I wasn’t sure, but he jerked the knife forward. I gasped, eyes wide as I watched the knife pierce my abdomen, my wallet dropping to the asphalt forgotten. The man also seemed surprised, as he took a step back.

“W-wait,” I pleaded breathly, but it was too late. The man yanked the knife out and took off running. “Shit,” I whispered, pressing the wound. Moving to sit on the trash littered pavement, I tried to keep pressure on my wound as I dialed 911.

“911 what’s your emergency?” The dispatcher asked calmly.

“I-I just got stabbed,” I replied, taking a shuddering breath in. The pain started to spread along with the blood that seeped between my fingers. “I need an ambulance.”

I kept trying to take deep breaths as I gave them my location. My vision started to get blurry as stars filled my peripheral vision. I hoped to whatever was listening that I was close enough to a hospital. That today wouldn’t be my last day. That all I lived up to was being an assistant. Not being able to say goodbye to Harley, to Jon. I tried to stay awake, yet my eyelids were growing heavier by the second. The drone of the dispatcher felt like a lullaby as they tried to question me, keep me awake, keep me alive.

The sound of sirens rang through my head foggily. The pressure I kept on my side had loosened as my hands started to feel colder. The searing pain started to numb as everything soon turned dark.

…

When Jonathan had walked into the hideout that following morning, the space was unusually quiet. As he passed your desk, he noted that it hadn’t changed since you left the night before. It was strange when the smell of coffee brewing no longer filled the air. That your cheery voice hadn’t greeted him. He felt his mood sour by the second.

Though it was odd that you were late. He couldn’t remember a day that you weren’t there to greet him. You were only human, and people made mistakes. He’ll let you off with a warning this time, but don’t make it a habit.

After making himself a pot of coffee, he went into his lab to drown himself in his work. Like usual. Yet that stupid nagging wouldn’t leave the back of his head. Where were you? If you needed to miss work you would’ve called in. Yes, typically he didn’t really allow sick days. His goons were paid to get the job done, not to lay around and be sick.

But you weren’t just any goon. You were his charming assistant who made his day, even if he didn’t show it. He paused his movements, eyes fogging over as he started to theorize where you could possibly be. Were you sick? Were you hurt? Maybe you forgot to call? With that thought, Jon took out his phone and called you. Each ring made his heart thump faster. When he heard your voice, a sense of comfort washed over him, only for it to be your voicemail. His comfort vanished. Remembering the fact that you had mentioned going to see Harley, he decided to call her. (Texting wasn’t really his thing).

“Hiya Jon!” Harley greeted over the phone. “You finally called!” Not wanting to waste time, Jon got right to the point, asking if she knew where you were. “Whaddya mean they’re not at work?” Harley asked, voice giving away her concern.

Jon hung up, a scowl starting to form on his face. Where the hell were you? A feeling he hadn’t felt in a long, long time started to form. His gut twisted, heart pumping faster, he felt scared. A feeling he’d normally welcome. A state he was so used to it felt like home. Yet, with the context of you possibly missing, his fear wasn’t welcome.

It wasn’t until an hour later when relief flooded through his system. Your caller I.D. flashed on his phone screen and he didn’t hesitate to answer.

…

The first thing I heard was the sound of beeping. I scrunched my face as pain seared through my abdomen. Blearily opening my eyes, the bright light overhead seared my brain. I let out a groan as everything started to hurt. My head pounded at the same time heels clicked against the ground. Looking over, a nurse rushed over to me.

“You’re awake!” She spoke loudly, her voice irritatingly cheery for my current condition. “The doctor’s on his way.”

“What happened?” I asked, throat raspy with misuse.

“I’ll let the doctor go over your condition,” The nurse replied patronizingly.

“What time is it?” I asked instead, wanting to get some information.

Pulling out her phone, she glanced at it before replying, “It’s currently 10:47 am.” A knock on the door sounded through the room before the doctor entered.

“Good morning,” The doctor greeted. “How are you feeling?”

“Bad,” I grumbled, trying to shift up on the hospital bed. The nurse quickly rushed over and helped me.

“Well, it would be concerning if you didn’t feel anything,” The doctor jokes. “I’m Dr. Bell. You’re currently in Gotham General Hospital. You were stabbed, luckily, all major organs and arteries were missed. You’ll be discharged in a few days if your wound shows no signs of infection. Do you have any questions?”

“Uhm,” I muttered, trying to take in all this information at once. “Where…are my things?”

“Would you bring their personal belongings Lynn?” Dr. Bell turned to the nurse who nodded and hurriedly, the sound of her heels following her out of the room. “Not so good news, there’s no one named under your emergency contact list, so you may have to stay longer in the hospital if you have no one to take care of you. And since you were stabbed, the police are here to do a brief interview.” I let out a sigh, leaning my head back. Dr. Bell nodded to two police officers standing just outside of my room before taking her leave.

“Hello,” One police officer greeted me. The other slightly tipping his hat. “I’m Detective Yates, that’s my partner Tanner. I’m sure you already know why we’re here.” I nodded, pulling the thin hospital blanket further up.

“We know this may be hard to talk about,” Tanner spoke up. “It’s still fresh, but that’s why we try ta get as much info as we can right away.”

“It’s all really blurry,” I lied. “I might not be much help.” It wasn’t blurry. I remember every second vividly. The distress in the man's dark brown eyes. How his dark brown hair was tousled and greasy like he hasn’t had a shower in days. How his hands trembled with the silver of the knife glittering under the street lights. The look of utter horror, panic, and regret that flashed in his eyes as the knife plunged through my skin.

He was a person who needed help, not enforcement.

“Any detail will be of help,” Yates gruffed. “Do you remember how they looked?”

“He…he was tall. Maybe 5’9?” I offered. If I said nothing they’d get suspicious of my intentions. “He was wearing a hood, so I couldn’t see much besides that.”

“What clothes was he wearin’?” Tanner asked next.

“Uhm, black hoodie,” I replied. “And blue jeans.”

“How’d he act?”

“Scared,” I replied honestly. “I don’t think he meant to hurt me. He ran off right after. Don’t remember much after that.”

Another lie. I remember the fear that rushed through me when I believed I was a goner. The pain that felt like liquid fire burning through me. The glow of the street light that shined down on me as I bleed out. Though I doubt that’s what the police needed to know.

“Thank you for your time,” Detective Yates replied, standing up with his partner. “We’ll contact you if we find anything else.”

“Thanks,” I replied awkwardly, waving at them as they left. When I finally thought I’d be left to my own devices, Nurse Lynn entered carrying my belongings.

“You didn’t have much on you,” She said mindlessly, setting my things down on the bed beside me. “Wallet, phone, and keys. If you need anything, just press this button.” She aimlessly pointed near the side of my bed. With that, she was gone. Finally, peace and quiet…not counting the loud beeping of the heart monitor. Checking my phone, my eyes widened. Over 100 notifications. Most of them being none other than Harley Quinn.

Scrolling through the spam of texts Harley sent, my heart warmed at how much she really cared for me.

‘Jonny called me’

‘u ok toots?’

‘helloooooooooooooo’

‘ur scaring me here’

‘Jonny never called me before y’know’

‘ANSWER ME’

‘pls’

You get the jist. I quickly typed out a short ‘I’m ok, there was a small accident but it’s all good now’. Then I finally got to the first missed call. Dr. Crane. There was something common between Harley and I. Jon never called me before either, and my nerves started getting to me. I’d never missed a day of work before. Well…only if I were sick. I’d never missed a day of work without telling Jon before. Was he angry? Would he fire me? …would I become his next test subject?

I never thought about him like that before. I always felt a strange security around him. It was funny, I found comfort in a man who took away people's comfort. Yet that security was stripped. At the end of the day, he was still my boss. A man who didn’t take insubordination lightly. Yes I was literally stabbed, but there was that fear that still lingered. I suppose that was Jon’s entire motif.

Taking a deep breath, I pressed the call button quickly, like ripping off a bandaid. The heart monitor beeped more rapidly each time the phone rang. It rang three times before he finally answered, my name whispered out under his breath.

“Hey,” I replied, trying to sound nonchalant. “Sorry about everything. I, uh, had an accident last night. Doctor said I have to stay in the hospital for a few days, maybe longer since I don’t have anyone to take care of me if I were to go home.”

It was quiet for a few beats.

“Where are you being held?” He asked, his voice low. A shiver ran up my spine at his tone.

“Gotham General Hospital,” I replied back.

“I’ll be right there,” He muttered before hanging up. I blinked, unsure how to feel. But I couldn’t dwell on it long because I was being spam called by Harley.

“Hi Harley,” I answered.

“What do you mean you had an accident?” She shouted, making me pull the phone away from my ear.

“Okay, I’ll tell you everything but you gotta promise not to freak out,” I sighed. “Jon’s already on his way to visit me.”

“OMG YOU JUST CALLED HIM JON,” Harley shrieked. “Wait, you’re distracting me, what’s going on?”

“...I got stabbed.”

“YOU WHAT?”

I bit my lip, “It sounds worse than it is…?”

“You’re not makin’ much sense toots,” Harley replied, and I could hear the frown on her face. “How can a stabbing sound worse than it is? Are you at the hospital? Please tell me you’re gettin’ cared for.”

“I’m at Gotham Central Hospital,” I stated. “It’s all stitched up. Doc said nothing vital was hit and I just need time to heal. Like I said, it sounds worse than it is.”

Clearly pouting, Harley huffed, “I wish I could visit ya, but I think that’d cause a bit of a hassle.”

I laughed lightly before flinching at the pain it caused, “Yeah, I’d rather you not get arrested.”

“Tell me when you get out, okay?” Harley asked.

“Okay,” I agreed, a warm grin painting my lips.

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

“Do ya know who did it?” Harley finally asked. “I’d just like ta pay ‘em a little visit.”

Looking down at my lap, my smile turned more somber, “You don’t gotta do that Harls’. He didn’t seem to be in the right state of mind.”

“...” Harley stayed silent before responding. “That don’t matta. You got hurt, end of story. End of theirs too.”

I sighed, “No.”

“You got a big heart toots,” Harley sighed. “A little too big if ya ask me.”

I chuckled once more, “Yeah yeah.”

“You get betta for me, alright suga’?” She asked somberly.

“Of course,” I agreed.

“And you better call me!”

“I will.”

“...you callin’ him Jon now?” She asked, and I could just imagine the cheeky grin she held.

My heart stuttered at the implication, “I…it’s not that big of a deal.”

“Mhmmm,” She hummed. “No, of course not. You’ve just been callin’ him Crane for what? Two years now?”

“...”

Harley chuckled at my silence, “Alright, I’ll stop teasin’ ya. You get some rest, okay? I need my best friend back in tip top shape!”

“Aye, aye captain,” I saluted, even if she couldn’t see.

“Bye bye toots.”

“Bye Harley.”

I felt myself relax, looking over to the small tv that rested in the corner of the room. I picked up the remote that laid on the side table and scrolled through the channels. I frowned as nothing good seemed to be on, and it was hard to see the screen anyways. Why did they put it in the farthest corner of the room?

The sound of knocking resounded through the room, and a nurse entered the room shortly, “You have a visitor.” None other than Jonathan Crane towered behind the nurse. He was as put together as always, the only sign of something being wrong was the intensity of his gaze as it fell onto my figure. The nurse exited just as quickly, closing the door behind her.

The tension felt high as silence consumed the room. I picked at the linens, anxiety suddenly running through me. Talking to Harley helped me calm down about the situation, but Jon brought me back to reality.

“Just an accident?” Jon asked, his face never leaving its calm expression.

I offered a sheepish grin, “Does someone get stabbed on purpose?”

His face remained stoic, not a hint of amusement as I tried to diffuse the tension. Jon took a seat in the cheap plastic chair that sat next to the bed.

“How are you feeling?” He asked, the rage in his eyes dying down into a warm caring look.

I shrugged, “It hurts. I’m tired, a bit hungry.”

“Have you eaten anything yet?”

“No,” I shook my head. The previous tension had dissipated into a warmth. Maybe I should get stabbed more often if Jon would take care of me. Nah, the pain wasn’t all that fun.

…

With Jon taking care of me, my feelings towards him only grew stronger. He’d try to help me through the trauma I gained from the interaction. Trauma I didn’t even realize I really had. I would wake up in a cold sweat some nights, the feeling of the knife penetrating my skin feeling as real as it did the night of the attack. I also couldn’t get over the hopelessness I felt that night. The need to see the people I cared about most just one last time. How I took our interactions for granted.

I watched with gratitude as Jon pressed the back of his hand on my forehead, making sure I didn’t have a fever. Making sure I wasn’t catching an infection, even though my wound had nearly fully healed. The sudden urge to confess my feelings consumed me. This wasn’t how a boss normally treated their employee. This was how someone treated a loved one.

I wished to see his soft side, and now I saw it, and I never wanted to let go.

“Jon,” I whispered, my breath fanning over his face. His blue eyes met mine, urging me to continue with his expression alone.

Fear drives people. That’s what Jon theorized. And with recent events, I’ve come to realize that he’s right. I was afraid of rejection, and so I kept how I felt to myself. Now, I was afraid he’ll never know how I feel. How much I care for him, how much I admire and appreciate him.

“Thank you, for everything,” I thanked, taking in just how handsome he was. “Would you be okay with getting a coffee together?”

The faintest look of surprise crossed his features before that barely there grin pulled his lips up, “Sounds like a treat.”

“Then it's a date,” I grinned, closing the distance and pressing a kiss to his cheek.