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nvrsaidiwasinurcloset · 24 days

Note

okay hi just a warning rq my autocorrect is off bc it autocorrected my friend’s name to fuckin malayalam on accident. i dont like autocorrect.

ANYWAY! ive been listening to my lovely olivia rodrigo lately, specifically her new song obsessed. i wanted to know if you could make a fic with Ethan x fem! reader where readers bitchy friend has this ex (Ethan) and she made him out to be a real dick. like, manipulating and everything.

reader eventually meets him and it turns out that she remembers… a lot about him considering her friend is a constant yapper and cant shut up about him. Ethan actually turns out to be a real cutie patootie and could literally never hurt anyone.

a few days later theyd meet again at some club or party maybe where they end up hitting it off… a little too well.. yeah so she ends up in his bed (smut part, very dom ethan plspls 😛😛). they could be talking about something really random and then reader brings up how her friend basically completely lied about him and said he was a piece of shit when he really wasnt. like a realllll fluffy end before a small cliffhanger thats never gonna get finished where her friend ends up finding out and texting her.

so sorry if thats too long or confusing idk but i actually love your work so much im lowkey your #1 fan. 😍😍😍

HELLO! I switched this up a little, I hope that's okay! 💕

Also, I fucking loved the 'leave it on a cliffhanger part that won't get finished' because WHY IS THAT WHAT I DO lmao

Obsessed - Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader - Part 1

This contains SMUT - Minors DNI

Part 2

Summary: Your friend told you horrible lies about her ex-boyfriend, and once you get to know him, you realize he's not the monster she made him out to be.

Contains: Mentions of a toxic relationship, Dom-ish cocky Ethan, rough-ish sex, oral - f receiving, p in v, fluff (If I missed anything, PLEASE let me know. I'm sleep deprived atm)

A/N: This was the one that pulled me out of my writers block, lmao. It's still not where I want it to be, but I'm TRYING. I'll try to post more this week, but I will be busy so bear with me haha.

You didn’t know Ethan Landry, but you knew you didn’t like him. He used to date one of your friends, and after hearing all the horrible things he’d said and done during their relationship, you thought he was really scummy.

They dated in high school and couldn’t get enough of each other, so they wanted to go to the same college. They broke up right before freshman year started, and after almost a year, she still talked about him every chance she got. She’d tell you how controlling he was. The things he’d call her when he was mad. How he cheated on her. You couldn’t believe that she stayed in the relationship for as long as she did, because she never had anything good to say, except that she loved him.

You’d seen pictures of him, and after walking into one of your classes at the start of the new semester, you saw him in person for the first time. He was so shy as he took his seat in the lecture hall, some of the girls making their little comments about the rumors they’d heard about him. He didn’t seem like the type that would do the things your friend said, but maybe he was just really good at playing innocent. All you knew was that you needed to keep your distance from him.

When you met up with your friend later that day for lunch, you didn’t know if you wanted to bring up Ethan being in the same class as you, but once she brought him up, you decided to tell her.

“Speaking of Ethan…I saw him today,” you said, before taking a bite of your food. Her face dropped as she looked at you.

“Where did you see him?” she questioned. You explained that you saw him in one of your new classes, and she rolled her eyes. “Can you believe he still tries to text me?”

“What I can’t believe is that you haven’t blocked him,” you said, “I know I’d hate to see someone that treated me like shit’s name pop up on my phone.”

She started to giggle as you curiously stared at her. “I have him saved in my phone as ‘Tall loser with a small dick’, so I laugh every time he does text me.”

“That’s not toxic at all,” you said, as you started to think about what she’d said. “Wait, he treated you as bad as he did and has a small dick? What the fuck were you thinking?”

“All he had going for him was that he was cute,” she said, “But seriously, if I were you, I’d stay away from him.”

“Oh, please. Like I’d even want to be near him.”

Your morning wasn’t going as expected. You slept through all of your alarms; you didn’t have time to stop for coffee. You didn’t think your day could get any worse, until you walked into class and noticed the only empty seat available was beside Ethan. You took a deep breath before you walked over and sat down. Once you reached into your backpack, you realized that your laptop wasn’t there. You were in such a hurry when you ran out of your dorm and didn’t even think to grab it.

“Shit,” you whispered, “I’m so stupid.”

“Here,” Ethan said, passing you a notebook and a pen. You curiously looked at him as he offered a weak smile. “I always keep an extra notebook, just in case.”

“Thanks,” you said, a half-smile playing on your lips.

Once class started, you were taking your notes, but you kept glancing over to Ethan. He was so focused on typing that he didn’t notice, but you couldn’t help but wonder if everything your friend told you was true. At that moment, he didn’t seem like a jerk. Then again, he had only spoken a handful of words to you.

Ethan was aware of all the things that were said about him. He hoped that after a few weeks it all would’ve blown over, but once you have an angry ex-girlfriend paint you as some horrible, emotionally abusive asshole, it’s hard to come back from that. He knew that it was best for him to just keep his head down until he was able to transfer to a different school, where no one knew who he was. He was miserable at Blackmore, and he really had no reason to stick around, aside from the few friends he’d made.

After class was over, you tore the pages of notes you’d taken from the notebook to give it back to Ethan.

“Thanks again,” you said, as you handed it back to him.

“You’re welcome,” he said, shoving it back in his backpack. “I thought about just emailing you my notes, but I didn’t know if you’d want that.”

“You’re telling me I didn’t have to spend the last hour trying to write that fast?” you asked, as he flashed you a sweet, genuine smile. “Why wouldn’t someone want that?”

“I don’t know, maybe it’s because most people here hate me,” he said, sliding the straps of his backpack over his shoulders. “You’ve probably heard things about me.”

“Yeah…are they true?” you asked, as he shook his head.

“You’re the first person that’s asked me that. Everyone else just assumes everything is true,” he sighed, “But no, I’m not a bad person.”

You started to feel so guilty. You’d said plenty of bad things about him, but you only heard one side of the story. With your friends’ story changing so many times, getting more dramatic each time she told it, you were starting to realize that it was all bullshit. You still didn’t know exactly what happened, but you were curious to know what the truth was.

“You okay?” Ethan asked, noticing that you were lost in thought as you stood in front of him.

“I’m friends with your ex,” you said, as his smile slowly fell. “What’s the real story?”

He sat back down in his seat as the other students piled out of the room. You sat beside him as you waited for him to speak.

“I really loved her…but she was just so controlling. Then she cheated on me when she went to the beach with her family. I didn’t find out about that until right before we started college,” he said, looking over to you. “She was pissed that I broke up with her, then all these horrible things about me started going around.”

“That’s fucked up,” you said, as he nodded.

“Yeah, she’s still been trying to text me. I finally blocked her a few days ago.”

“Wait, she said you’ve been trying to text her,” you said, his eyes growing wide at your words.

“Her number’s been deleted from my phone for months. I have no interest in talking to her,” he said, “I know this must be weird for you since you are her friend, but I think it’s cool that you wanted to hear me out.”

“Well, I feel like I need to apologize…I’ve said some things about you that weren’t true.”

“She’s a good liar. She has almost the entire school hating me so it doesn’t surprise me that her friend does, too,” he said, as he stood back up.

“I don’t hate you,” you said, smiling at him. “I don’t know if you’d want to, and I know she’d kill me, but if you ever want to hang out sometime, let me know.”

“I’d like that.”

Ethan was kicking himself for not asking you for your number, or shit, even your social media so he could DM you. He thought you were beautiful, but he knew that hoping for a chance with you would be a reach. He really just needed more people in his life that believed him to make the time he still had at the university more enjoyable.

Your friend begged you to come to a random frat party that you didn’t feel like going to in the first place. After your talk with Ethan, you weren’t even sure you wanted to be around her. You still went, and after searching for her for almost an hour, you checked your phone to see a message from her that she wasn’t coming, and that she ran into one of the guys she’d been hooking up with on the way to the party.

“Why the fuck am I even here?” you said to yourself as you locked your phone and slid it into the back pocket of your jeans.

“Hopefully to hang out with me, if your offer’s still good,” you heard from behind you, recognizing Ethan’s voice.

“Hey,” you said as you turned to face him. “I didn’t expect to see the most hated man on campus here.”

“My roommate told me that if I stayed in my dorm tonight, he’d throw my Xbox out the window,” he said, glancing over to the muscular guy that was watching Ethan talk to you.

“Ah, so you were threatened into being social,” you said, as he started to laugh.

“I guess you could say that. Do you want a drink?”

“Sure.”

Ethan wasn’t much of a drinker; you could tell by the sour look on his face every time he took a sip. It gave him a little confidence though, as the two of you talked and got to know each other a little better.

“I don’t think I can drink this anymore,” he said, sitting the cup down on a table. You sat yours down too, and as soon as you did, someone bumped into you, shoving you into Ethan.

“Shit, I’m sorry,” you said, looking up at him. Your chest was pressed closely against his, his hands on your hips from catching you.

“Don’t be sorry,” he said, “You can stay this close to me all night, if you want.”

“Are you always this smooth? Or is it the alcohol?” you questioned as he smirked at you.

“I’m only buzzed,” he said, before he leaned down, placing his lips on yours.

Chad was still watching Ethan from afar, cheering and thrusting his fist in the air once he saw Ethan kiss you. He started to laugh against your lips before he pulled away to stare daggers through his roommate for interrupting the moment.

“I can’t take him anywhere,” Ethan said, as you smiled at him.

“We could go somewhere more private,” you suggested, as he took your hand in his.

“Want to go back to my dorm? He’ll be here for a while so I know we can talk without being interrupted.”

“Sure!”

Once you made it back to Ethan’s dorm, you were starting to think that he really did just want to talk. You enjoyed listening to him, though. He was telling you about all his hobbies and interests, and you were telling him yours. You started to glance around his side of the dorm room, noticing the cliché, dorky things you’d expect to see.

“Nice Star Wars poster, nerd,” you joked, as he smirked at you.

“Oh, I’m a nerd?” he said, as he nudged you back on his bed. He was hovering over you, his mouth inches from yours. The sexual tension got so thick as his eyes looked into yours, his hand rubbing your hip.

“Mhm,” you said, the corner of your bottom lip in between your teeth. “A hot nerd.”

He felt his cheeks start to heat up, and he really didn’t want you to notice, so he leaned down to finally connect his lips to yours. It didn’t take long for the kiss to get more intense, his tongue brushing across your bottom lip. You let him deepen the kiss, his tongue moving with yours as his hands started to roam. You whimpered into the kiss once his hand squeezed your thigh, your hips started to squirm underneath him.

He pulled away but still stayed close so the two of you could catch your breath. You were reading each other’s faces, and it was obvious that you both wanted more.

“How far do you want this to go?” he asked, his breathing still heavy as his eyes looked into yours.

“As far as you want,” you said, your sweet tone making him groan.

“That’s not what I asked you,” he said, as he leaned back down to kiss your neck. His curls were tickling you, but the only reaction you had were the soft moans slipping past your lips from how well his mouth moved. His hips were rutting into yours, showing you how hard he was for you.

“I want you to fuck me,” you said, as he pulled away to look at you.

“You sure?”

“Mhm.”

Ethan was a little, well, very eager. He got you undressed in what felt like seconds, leaving you in just your panties. Once he stripped down to just his boxers, you got a little curious. You glanced down to see his hard cock straining against the fabric, and started to laugh to yourself, your gaze going to the ceiling.

“What’s funny?” he asked, as he hovered back over you to take one of your nipples in his mouth. Your laughing stopped, a gasp slipping out when he started to suck. “I asked you a question,” he teased, before moving to the other side.

“She really does lie about everything,” you said, as his tongue swirled. “She said you had a small dick.”

He started to laugh against you, before he pulled back. “That’s funny, because she couldn’t take it.”

“I can,” you said, his smile turning to a smirk as his hand trailed down your body to rub you over your panties.

“We’ll see about that,” he said, as he moved lower down the bed to position himself between your thighs.

He slid your panties down your legs, before running his fingers over your wet pussy. Your eyes stayed on him, your bottom lip in between your teeth as he teased you. Your anticipation just kept building as he moved down the bed, positioning himself in between your thighs. He leaned in, slipping his tongue inside your entrance.

He was sloppily eating you out, his head moving from side to side. His arms hooked under your thighs to pull you as close to his face as he could as your hands went to his hair.

“So good,” you whimpered, your breathing getting faster as he worked you closer to your orgasm.

He slid his tongue out of you to focus on your clit, quickly replacing it with two of his fingers. Your back was arching off the bed as he moved his arm back and forth, applying as much pressure as he could to that spongy spot inside you as he sucked on your swollen bundle of nerves.

“You’re gonna make me cum,” you babbled, as he started to chuckle with your clit in his mouth.

That was all it took for your legs to start shaking and your grip on his hair getting even tighter. Once your pussy started to clench around him, he slowed his fingers to a slow roll, not wanting to overstimulate you. His tongue gently licked your clit as he worked you through it, your whimpers getting softer as you came down from your high.

“That was the best orgasm I’ve ever had,” you admitted through your shaky breathing. Ethan started to laugh a little as you looked at him, your eyes hazy. “What?”

“Just wait until I’m inside you,” he cockily said, “You still confident that you can handle it?”

“I know I can,” you said, your legs instinctively spreading wide for him as his fingertips ran up your thigh.

“What are you going to do when no one else can make you feel as good as I do?” he questioned, as one of his fingers started to rub circles on your clit.

“I guess I’d have to keep you around then,” you said, as he shook his head.

“You’d only have me until summer starts,” he said, his finger moving faster. “I’m transferring to a different school after this year.”

“No, you’re not..fuck. I’ll convince you to stay,” you said, relaxing into the bed as he teased you.

Ethan pulled his hand away from your pussy before he slid his boxers off. He crawled back on top of you and reached over to his bedside table to grab a condom.

“I might let you convince me,” he said, as he lined up with your entrance. You tensed up a little because you knew how big he was. “Relax, baby.”

You did as he said, taking a deep breath as he inched his way inside of you. You were moaning as he stretched you out, and when you thought he was all the way in, he just kept going.

“Oh fuck,” you whimpered, feeling so full as he finally came to a stop, wanting to give you plenty of time to adjust. “Told you..Fuck, I told you I could take it,” you said, already struggling to speak.

“Don’t get cocky,” he said, your mouth falling open as he started to move. “I’m going to ruin this pussy.”

“Ruin it,” you said, challenging him as your lusty, hooded eyes connected with his.

It took everything in Ethan to not immediately start pounding into you, but he didn’t want to hurt you. He started slow, your eyebrows already furrowing together, low moans slipping past your lips. The head of his cock hit that special spot every single time, but you needed more. He sped up a little as your legs wrapped around him, your hands gripped tightly around his biceps.

“Maybe you can take it,” he said, his breathing getting heavier. “Can I go faster?”

“Yes,” you whimpered, as his hips moved quicker.

Your brain was starting to turn to mush, the babbles slipping past your lips making absolutely no sense. The only thing your mind could process in that moment was how good Ethan was making you feel. He thought you were adorable, already so cock drunk, and he wasn’t even close to being done with you yet. He kept his pace, but occasionally thrust a little harder to see if you could take it, the loud moans slipping past your lips as your nails started to dig into his arms letting him know that you could.

He angled your hips to go even deeper. His pace was a little slow as he made sure you were okay. Your eyes were pleading with him to go faster, because you knew the words weren’t going to come out of your mouth. It was getting so hard for him to hold back, so he finally let go. He started to pound into you so hard that your skin was tingling, all the nerves in your body on edge. Your toes were curling as he slammed into your g-spot, your whimpers turning to cries as you felt your orgasm starting to build. It was hard for you to keep your eyes open, and you were sure Ethan was going to have your nail marks on his arms forever with how hard you were squeezing him.

“Fuck,” was the only word you were able to get out, your legs wrapping tightly around him as your body started to involuntarily jolt. Ethan was sure that everyone in the surrounding dorm rooms knew what was happening, because you were being so loud. He wasn’t letting up though. He loved that he was making you feel that good.

It only took a few more deep thrusts before your entire body started to tremble, loud whines flooding out of your mouth as the wave of euphoria washed over you. He chased his own orgasm as he fucked you through it, your pussy clenching him so tight that he was moaning himself.

“I’m almost there, baby,” he said, a slight rasp in his voice from all the panting he’d been doing.

You went limp, your grip on his arms and your legs around his waist relaxing as his hips started to falter, a loud groan slipping past his lips as he released into the condom.

He took a minute to catch his breath before he slid out of you. His abs were burning and his arms were sore from your nails, but he quickly got up to take the condom off so he could take care of you.

He crawled in the bed next to you as you adjusted to lay your head on his chest, still so fucked out that it was hard to process your thoughts. Ethan just held you close, his hands softly rubbing over your bare back as you relaxed into his touches.

“You’re okay, right?” he asked, after a few minutes of you not saying anything. You lazily nodded as your hand moved to rub across his chest.

You laid there in silence as you started to think about what’d just happened. You knew your friend was going to be pissed if she ever found out, but did that even matter? She made almost the entire university hate Ethan for things he never did, and it made you sad that he felt like he needed to switch to a different school so he wouldn’t have to deal with it anymore.

“So…” you finally said, “How can I convince you to stay?”

He let out a nervous laugh, not knowing the best way to respond. “I can’t take people talking about me the way they do anymore.”

“Even if I convince everyone that it was all lies?” you questioned, your tone playful as you angled your head to look at him. “I think it’d be awful for you to leave because of her. You could miss out on someone that would treat you right.”

“Someone like you?” he questioned as he looked down at you. You nodded, before he leaned down to kiss you. “You’re good at this whole convincing thing.”

“Does that mean you’ll stay?” you asked, smiling as you sat up to look at him.

“Yeah, as long as you don’t break my heart,” he said, wrapping his arms around you to pull you back down to his chest.

“I won’t.”

You stayed in Ethan’s bed for a couple hours, making plans for all the dates he wanted to take you on. It felt like you’d known him for way longer than just a few days, the two of you having an instant connection. You hated to pull away from him, but you knew you needed to get dressed before his roommate got home.

“It’s late, can I walk you back to your dorm?” he asked, as he started to put his clothes back on.

“I can’t believe I thought you were this horrible monster. You’re so sweet,” you said, as he smiled at you. “Yeah, you can walk me home.”

Ethan walked you to the front door of your building, pulling you into a gentle kiss before he pulled away.

“I’ll text you,” he said, as he started to back away.

“Yeah, let me know when you make it back to your dorm, please,” you said, as he nodded.

When you made it upstairs and got settled into your bed, you heard your phone vibrate as it charged on your bedside table. You grabbed it and saw a goodnight message from Ethan, a huge smile on your face as you responded to him. You were so exhausted from the time you’d spend with him, and you soon felt yourself start to doze off. You heard your phone buzz again, your eyes lazily opening to see if it was Ethan. You took a deep breath once you read the message that was sent to you.

‘Why the fuck were you kissing Ethan at that party?’

#ethan landry #ethan landry x reader #scream smut #ethan landry smut #smut

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partycatty · 2 months

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So ive been obsesed with janet cage since she appeared in the end of mk1 and now shes finally being released with peacemaker and im desperate for something ANYTHING PLEASE 🙏 😭

YOURE SO ME FR I LOVE JANET SO MUCH GENUINELY i need her so bad she's my pfp and banner on discord rn HAHA thank you for sharing your thoughts bc i was so afraid i was alone HEHE

janet cage > this one's for you, baby!

janet's got a wittle crush on the reader, and will go to stupid lengths to show herself off

notes: you're in the genderbent universe :3 but because i'm stupid, the chosen ones' names are gonna remain the same because i couldn't think of a genderswapped name for them and wasn't about to do them dirty with new names LMAO

[ masterlist ]

it was only a couple months into training, and things were looking... decent? at least, you could consider yourself improving. sure, combat was something you trained in, but when it came to you versus whatever horrors outworld contained, you tugged at the collar of your shirt.

janet, however, seemed unfazed. actually, she seemed ecstatic! you'd seen a couple of her movies and knew she could kick ass if needed. her physique impressed you, as did her endless charm and effortless ability to piss the swordswoman off. her attitude was brushed off for your sake. you knew she had just gone through a messy divorce with her ex-wife, is in talks of selling her mega mansion, and new roles were coming up dry. you'd think she'd be bitter but it turned out to be quite the opposite. her typical swagger and flourished gestures tore you from your thoughts.

"there she is!" janet exclaims, swinging a toned arm around your shoulder and tugging you close to her side. "you miss me? i bet you did!" you recall the last time you interacted with her: lunch. twenty minutes ago. even still, her perky attitude flustered you quicker than you'd like to admit.

"suuure," you sarcastically reply, hoping to toy with her ego a bit. "as if i didn't see you at lunch."

"it's hard to not miss me when i'm not around," she sighs dramatically, as if she has the hard life. "no need to lie to me, babe. you love having me around." your insides twist at the name. as you eyes are downcast, janet's eyes light up more than usual with a slight blush to her cheeks.

"whatever you wanna believe, miss A-List," you swat her arm, and she removes it though her grin remains unfaltered. janet pauses for a moment, lifting her sunglasses from her eyes and settling them on top of her head. you're winded by her beauty. you had seen it on screen as mentioned before, but there was some alluring power of her eyes when they were only a couple feet from your face. janet could kick ass, but she was also a gorgeous actress.

"tell you what," she shoots a single finger gun at you, once again removing you from your daydreams full of her face... among other things. "you won't have to miss me tonight. raiden and i planned to spar after dinner. you'll watch me kick her ass, right?" there was a hint of pleading, almost nervousness in her gaze. as if she needed you to say yes. her brows knitted together for only a single twitch.

"don't sweat," you reassure her, taking her strong hands in yours with a soft smile. "i'll be your cheerleader." with your confirmation, you turn on your heel and head the other direction to tend to your own duties. what you don't notice, however, is janet whooping to herself as soon as your back is turned.

just as the sun hits golden hour, you and the girls are waiting by the sparring ring. raiden stands straight, hands behind her back as she waits for her opponent to arrive. and so she does. janet comes jogging into view, waving at the crowd of monks and earthrealmers. she waves and smiles, blowing kisses to an unamused audience. she acts like it's another one of her performances. liu kang rolls her eyes.

"i bet your chakram hat that janet gets her ass kicked," you mutter to kung lao, who stood beside you with a smirk. she nudges your shoulder.

"aren't you supposed to be on janet's side?" kung lao mumbles back with a knowing grin. when you return with a perplexed frown, she scoffs. "everyone and their mother could figure out you're into her."

your cheeks puff up out of frustration, ready to rip kung lao a new one for being so loud and direct, but you see a hand snap in your face. snapping your neck to the source, you meet your eyes with janet's, who was leaning down to catch your attention.

"hey hey, eyes on me, sweet thing," her voice feels like honey when it drops low, and you snap back to her attention with a dazed look in your eye. your heel drives into kung lao's foot when you hear her snicker. "atta girl, check this out." a part of you dies inside from embarrassment. damn her and her confidence.

the spar begins, and admittedly it's evenly matched. punches are matched with kicks, parries and dodges slightly rile the crowd up from how equal the combat is. while raiden is calculated, janet is quick, and it becomes apparent that janet actually has a good chance.

that is, until she successfully knocks raiden to the ground. she's doubled over in pain, trying to prop herself up enough to come back from the near-knockout. janet winds up a fist almost comically, winding it in circles with a grin. just before she lands the blow, she turns to you with a beaming, cocky grin.

"this one's for you, baby!" janet shouts out, pulling her sunglasses down with her other hand to wink. before you could even consider being flattered, raiden flips up and shifts her weight, readying a godlike kick.

WHAM!

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

janet sits awkwardly on the cot, fidgeting with the now broken pair of sunglasses in her hands. she can't seem to bring herself to focus on you, even as you're leaning into her to wipe her wounds.

"you should have been more careful," you gently scold her, holding her face up by her chin to wipe the dried blood on her nose. "i don't need the whole show to be impressed, janet."

she smiles lazily, eyelashes fluttering as she inspects your features. "did i at least look hot getting my nose broken?"

you want to sigh and scold her further, but you decided to indulge in her entertainment and smile back, and janet visibly tenses up at your warm stare.

"very."

her lazy smile turns into a lopsided grin as she realizes you're calling her hot. not that her ego needed it really, she knew she was hot. but you saying of it all people, dear lord she was reeling. although she was an actress, a damn good one, you could see she was visibly straining herself from losing it. so, considering you had the upper hand, you hold her face by her cheeks and squish gently with a teasing smile.

"you're blushing."

janet frowns dubiously. "am not."

"i can see it. you're blushing." your eyes flicker between hers, and then to her lips briefly. she sucks them in, focusing on your own lips with dazed eyes.

perhaps janet could use another lesson, you think. so, instead of indulging in what you both want, you let go of her face and place the bloodied rag in a discard bin, wiping your hands on your thighs. janet freezes with a pleading look, knowing exactly what you're doing. you're playing a sick game of cat and mouse.

"where are...?" janet's voice trails off sheepishly, the hardest indicator that you've caught her off guard. she wants to stand up and follow you out, but the monks told her to stay, and a pounding migraine from the blow made sudden movement difficult.

"gotta fight for what you want, janet," you coo innocently, waving with your fingers before you exit the tent. "just don't get your ass kicked. maybe then i'll reward you."

you're not around long enough to see the steam spilling from her ears and her beet-red cheeks.

#mortal kombat #mortal kombat x reader #johnny cage #mk1 #johnny cage x reader #janet cage #janet cage x reader #marley writes ☆

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wonwoonlight · 3 months

Text

finding love / kim mingyu

a/n: mingyu brain rot bc i dreamt of him last night and ive never felt so loved 😭😭😭😭 first fic of the year! not proofread bc im too lazy. Enjoy🤍 do tell me if u enjoy this??? Hello???

wc: 1.1k // just some musings about love // fluff // super very soft // i dont think theres any warning except that i want him NOW.

[ ♤♤♤ ]

You don't know love until Kim Mingyu.

It's not anything as dramatic as you not believing in it. You just really haven't found the right person, nor have you been trying to look for one. Which is why it's a wonder that you end up with someone as wonderful as Kim Mingyu.

Your meeting with him wasn't anything special either. It's nothing out of a fiction; it's not exciting and it's not magical. It's just you, being Chan's friend and introduced to the members when he invited you to their concert and you visited the backstage once it finished.

It wasn't an instant click either, you just ended up talking individually somehow and the relationship progressed as time passed by.

You don't know love until Kim Mingyu.

He holds your hand when you're afraid even if you don't say anything.

He holds your hand when you're afraid even if he's afraid.

You both hate horror movies with passion, but once in a blue moon you two would challenge yourself just to see if it has changed. Every single time Mingyu would brace it and watch through everything just so he can tell you when to close your eyes and when it's okay to open them again.

You don't know love until Kim Mingyu.

He would listen to everything you talk about. From your complain about your coworkers, to your random ramble about some stuff you see on Instagram reels.

He listens.

He always does.

Because one day you're talking about how it's been quite some time since you've eaten lasagna and the next dinner Mingyu bakes lasagna for you himself.

He listens.

Because when you mention once in passing to your friend, to which Mingyu only listens partly to because you're on the phone and doesn't realize he's already awoken from his nap, that you've always wanted to try snorkeling, Mingyu arranges for it immediately once he finds a suitable date for you both.

You don't know love until Kim Mingyu.

He finds time to contact you in midst of busy schedules, and always tells you beforehand if he's going to be too busy to reach out in any way. You've told him plenty of times that you understand and that he doesn't need to reassure you everytime, but you've also told him once long before you started dating that you're the type to welcome words of assurance more than anything.

So he continues to reassure you everytime he can.

“What do you think about this?” Mingyu asks, yet again in another set of outfits.

You don't know shit about fashion, and you think Mingyu looks good in everything because he knows how to dress himself well. This is something that he's aware of, but he also likes your validation so you always try your best to say anything other that “You look good” and “I like this better than the previous one”.

“I think… you know I like it best when you're in black so I'm not sure if your current outfit is actually better than the black one or not.” You say sheepishly, to which Mingyu laughs at.

Your heart skips a beat at the sound of his laughter, something that hasn't changed despite having dated him for almost a year now. He makes his way to you and engulf you in a hug, whispers something that sounds suspiciously like “you're so cute” though he doesn't admit it because you don't like being called cute.

“Hmm.. Maybe I should go for the black one.” He says as he looks at himself in the mirror once again.

“What? No! Wear what you think is best. You know I have zero sense of fashion.”

“You like it, though.”

“I like you. You know you can wear the ugliest shirt out there and I'll still like it.”

Mingyu freezes and you see the tips of his ears turning red. You don't always say your feelings out loud, and when you do, it always hits a soft spot within him. And for all the cheesy comments Mingyu always parades to his fans, he's actually bad at receiving them himself.

You would usually jump at this opportunity to tease him, but you're feeling especially soft today, so you walk up next to him and tiptoes to kiss his cheek.

“I appreciate your sentiment, but don't trust me this time around, okay?” You chuckle and cup his warm face before dropping a peck on his lips.

“Alright…” He presses his lips together and goes for another kiss. “You'll really like everything…?”

And as much as Mingyu reassures you, you reassure him back.

“I like you. So you can wear anything, and I'll like it as long as it's not something weird like a dragon costume or something.”

Mingyu succumbs with a shy smile and hides his face in your neck.

You don't know love until Kim Mingyu.

He's brought you happiness that you didn't know existed. He always makes your bad days good and your good days even better.

You automatically look for him when something makes you laugh, a part of you always wishes to share your happiness with him no matter where he is. You also look for him when you're not feeling your best, because one look and Mingyu knows you need him beside you, his arms enveloping you to ground yourself to him, and his deep voice reminds you that things are going to be okay.

“Does it bother you?” Seungkwan asks one day. You, him, Mingyu, and Seungcheol are chilling in Mingyu's dorm.

“What?” You return his question, getting more comfortable on the sofa. You're leaning against Seungcheol's shoulder, as Mingyu is too busy playing something on his phone and you don't want to restrict his movement by leaning into him.

“The… you know. Whispers. What people say?”

“About me and Mingyu?” You make sure. Your relationship isn't public, but you know some people in his company doesn't exactly approve of his choice of a girlfriend even though their opinions don't matter.

“Yeah…”

You hum as you look at Mingyu, sitting comfortably on the floor near Seungkwan. He comments on how random the younger guy's question is, but doesn't seem too bothered by it.

Something pleasant settles in your chest as you continue looking at him, your smile growing when the answer to Seungkwan's question pops in your mind.

“Not really, no.” You turn to him with a smile, your voice firm with security. “I know Mingyu loves me and that's enough.”

You don't know love until Kim Mingyu.

Because he loves you with everything he has to offer and beyond, never once failing to let you know his feelings haven't wavered.

Because you want to do everything for him even if you're not able to, your heart always finding a way to be with him even when he's not next to you.

#my hand hurts writing this on phone lol #the mingyu brainrot is real #mingyu fluff #mingyu scenarios #mingyu fic #seventeen fluff #seventeen scenario #seventeen au #mingyu au #seventeen scenarios #seventeen x reader #khione.fics #svt fic #svt imagines #mingyu imagines #svt fluff

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emptysekai · 1 year

Text

guide to ad-free youtube for mobile via. youtube revanced

since youtube vance is no longer maintained and youtube is cracking down on adblockers here is how to download youtube revanced which has the best options for customising youtube features; including removing youtube shorts popups, sponsorship segments in videos, hiding unused buttons, bringing back dislikes, and more! [official revanced github]

this guide is for android only. sorry apple users idk how to help you. your device doesn't have to be rooted. even if it is, you should still be able to follow this guide. if you have youtube vanced installed, revanced shouldn't clash, so you don't have to uninstall it if you don't want to.

installation guide:

1. download all 3:

i. microg (this will let you log into your youtube account) [apk mirror] (scroll past description, download the latest one)

ii. revanced manager apk [github] (select the latest release, scroll to the bottom in assets, install the .apk file)

iii. latest youtube apk [apk mirror]

2. open revanced manager

3. select in this order: "patcher" -> "select an application" -> "storage" (note: if your phone asks you to let the app have storage access, say yes)

[id. two screenshots of the revanced manager app. there are red markings drawn overtop, indicating areas to select mentioned in step 3. the three spots are circled by a red square, an arrow pointing towards it, and a circle with a marked number to indicate the order at the end of each arrow. id end.]

4. select the youtube apk you downloaded

5. select patches. you can tap "recommended" or "default" or turn on/off patches you want

6. once you have selected, select: "done" -> "patch"

7. wait as it intialises youtube revanced. when it's done select "install" (note: if your phone gives you a warning that the app is blocked, select: "more details" -> "install anyway")

8. if this worked, you should have youtube revanced installed, and you can log in like normal. if this didn't work, read the next part.

(under the read more are troubleshooting solutions + other alternative apps)

issue a) if the botom right now says "open"

1. select: 3 dots on the top right -> "export apk"

2. save it

3. open whatever file browsing app you use (most phones should have a default one that comes pre-installed called something like "files" or "my files". if you don't have one, you can go to the play store and search "files" and pick one. if you aren't sure, i use "files by google")

4. find the exported file and install it (it will be called something like "youtube-revanced-versionnumber.apk")

5. if this worked, you should have youtube revanced installed, and you can log in like normal. if this didn't work, you can read the next part.

issue b) can't build or install youtube revanced with no option to export

1. something may have gone wrong with the file installation at some point, so try a clean start. to do this, uninstall:

i. revanced manager

ii. youtube revanced

iii. microg

iv. (optional) disable/uninstall the default youtube app

2. follow guide from step 1 again, hopefully it works. if it's still not working, you can try other alternatives. i've listed some in the next part of this post

alternatives:

libretube, newpipe, songtube, vuetube, astron, puretuber

i haven't used any of these personally, but i haven't seen any problems with them. let me know if there are and i'll remove it from the list.

you can also use youtube through your web browser with adblock add-ons. i'm not sure whether youtube has affected their mobile site though. with the firefox app you can use ublock origins (for ads) + youtube high definition (for general quality fixes)

#txt #❤️‍🩹#yay ^_^ feel free to rb this i hope it helps #let me know if something doesn't make sense and i can try to reword it or add screenshots #i tried to keep it concise

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rollingsins · 10 months

Text

all hers, part xxi

summary: Richie's gone. Sam and Tara rush to the police station, and R gets a visit from someone she hoped to never see again.

warnings: (+18), Tara is Ghostface, mention of murder. Mention of sex, violence.

word count: 3.5k

a/n: it's here! GF final reveal. as mentioned previously, I'm going to try keep the blog spoiler free for the next 48 hours, so won't be posting spoilery asks, but please still feel free to send them through! I'll post them a little later :))))) hope you all enjoy, and I hope your theory was correct!

Nobody says anything for a good twenty seconds.

The Sheriff’s face is stony. Serious.

You feel as if your heart has just dropped down into your stomach.

Tara’s hand grips tight on your hip.

Sam blinks, mouth open like a fish out of water.

And then it’s her who breaks the silence.

“He’s gone?”

She blinks once more. Her words turn into a splutter.

“But he’s dead.”

The Sheriff swallows. You almost feel bad for her, the way she wrings her hat in her hands like she’s standing in front of a courthouse of jurors.

“He was admitted to the morgue,” She explains, voice soft, “There was a fifteen minute window where the Coroner was off shift. We think it happened then.”

“You think what happened?” You ask, heartbeat hammering loudly in your ears, “You think he got up and walked out?”

“No,” Says the Sheriff, a little impatient, “He was dead. He’s definitely dead-”

“And you lost him?” Tara asks, her voice rising, “You lost a dead guy?”

The Sheriff looks at Sam.

“Perhaps we should do this somewhere more private?”

“Absolutely not,” Sneers Tara, “You don’t exactly have a track record of asking the right questions, Sheriff.”

Except she does. And you know it. You touch Tara’s arm, try to quiet her.

Let’s not piss off the person who can haul you right back to jail, the look in your eyes says.

But Sam crosses her arms.

“Tara stays. She’s right, Sheriff. First you try to pin six murders on her, then you lose the actual culprit. The dead culprit.”

The Sheriff purses her lips.

“I’m not here to argue,” She says, directing a pointed look at your girlfriend, “But I am here to find out what happened. Whoever Richie was working with likely took his body. Why? I don’t know. But I need answers. And fast.”

Sam furrows her brow.

“I don’t know who he was working with,” She says, “I didn’t even know what he was doing in his spare time. Hell, I had no idea who he truly was.”

She sounds a little agonized. Like it’s her fault her boyfriend almost had her sister killed.

“But you knew him.” Says the Sheriff, “You knew his patterns, his friends, his routine. If we can pin down some names, we might be able to find the culprit.”

She stands a little taller.

“And I’d like you to come down to the station and help me figure it out. Please.”

Sam looks at Tara, a little torn.

“I need to be here with my sister.” She says.

“Your sister will be fine,” Says the Sheriff, “I can arrange for a squad car. Two, if you need it. She’ll be safe, Sam. They won’t let anything happen to her.”

“Fuck that,” Says Tara, “We’re coming. Down to the station. Sam, I’m not letting you talk to them alone.”

There’s fire in her voice. Fire that usually only sparks when it comes to you. You blink, a little surprised. Sam seems to be surprised by it too, going off the look on her face.

“That really isn’t necessary.” Cuts in the Sheriff, hurriedly, “Tara, it’s really better if I talk to Sam alone-”

“You’re not talking to Sam without me,” Growls Tara.

The Sheriff blinks, her shoulders drawn tight like she’s gearing for a fight. And then she slumps them.

“Alright,” She says, voice even, “What matters is finding Richie and his partner. Tara can be with you.”

Sam swallows. She nods, only slightly.

“I’ll get my jacket.”

You’re halfway into climbing into the Sheriff’s squad car when a familiar Ford Focus pulls into the driveway.

It’s your Mom’s car. You spot her behind the wheel, looking a little forlorn as she hurries to step out.

And then you see your Dad. Face pinched. Annoyed. Like this is the last place he wants to be.

“One second,” You tell the Sheriff, and before she can protest, you’re climbing out of the backseat and stepping out onto the drive.

“YN,” Says your Mom, a little out of breath as she approaches.

Your Dad hovers by the car, scowl on his face as he surveys Tara in the backseat of the squad car. Your Mom’s eyes widen.

“She’s not been arrested again?”

“No, Mom,” You huff, “The Sheriff just needs Sam’s help on something, that’s all.”

“Oh,” Says your Mom. Then her voice softens, “Darling, please. Come home with us. We all need to talk.”

“I don’t think so, Mom.” You begin, “Not when Dad’s acting- crazy, like this.”

You look over at him. He hasn’t taken his eyes off Tara. Glaring, eyes frosted over. Like he hates her more than anyone else in the world.

“Dad has agreed to listen,” Your Mom begs, “Please, sweetheart. He knows he overreacted about the- sex,” Her voice drops, like she’s just said something scandalous, “But the other things - the arrest. The manslaughter?”

“Self-defense,” You say immediately.

Your Mom swallows.

“The self-defense. We need to talk about it. You’re still our daughter. Our only daughter. And we’re worried about you.”

You shoot a look over to the squad car.

The Sheriff is watching, her eyes pinched. Sam’s watching your Dad, but Tara is looking at you.

“Babe?” She says from the car, voice soft, “What is it?”

It isn’t the worst idea in the world. They’re still your parents, after all. You don’t want this - your Dad angry at you. Angry at Tara. You don’t want to ruin your relationship with them if it can be salvaged.

Your Mom blinks, desperation in her eyes. You soften, pursing your lips.

“I’m going to go with my parents,” You tell Tara, “My Mom is right. We should talk.”

Tara sits up. She pries off her seatbelt immediately.

“I’ll come.” Tara says, climbing out of the car.

“No.” Your Dad growls from the car. You ignore him. Rub your hands over Tara’s forearms.

“Babe, it’s fine. You need to go with Sam,” You remind her. You lower your voice, “You need to be in there, make sure she’s okay. Like you said."

Tara looks at you, conflicted.

“But, babe-”

“I’ll be fine,” You assure, “I’ll be with my parents. You and Sam can come and pick me up from the house when you’re done.”

“But Ghostface-”

“Isn’t going to attack me in broad daylight,” You say, “Besides. My Dad’s arsenal is almost as big as Sam’s. Remember?”

Tara looks at your Dad, a little doubtful.

“She’ll be fine, Tara, I’ll send in a squad car.” Says The Sheriff, looking over the rim of her sunglasses at you, “But if you want to go, I don’t mind talking to Sam alone-”

Her tone of voice suggests she very much wants Tara to stay with you. Tara picks it up the same moment you do. Her eyes narrow. Sam's an easy target - Richie's girlfriend, perhaps she could even be sold as his partner in crime.

“You’re not talking to Sam without me,” She says, voice a growl. She shimmies out of the backseat and presses a kiss to your lips, “Keep your phone on,” She says, “Text me every five minutes, okay?”

You nod.

“Okay, babe.” You assure, offering her a small smile.

She kisses you once more.

“And be careful.”

The drive back to your parents house is in silence.

You sit in the back seat, twiddling your thumbs. Your Mom drives, your Dad stewing in silence.

When you arrive at the house, it isn’t much better.

“I’ll make tea,” Says your Mom, hurrying off to the kitchen as you and your Dad settle down on the sofa. His lip twitches, like he has something he wants to say, but you get in first.

“You owe Tara an apology,” You say, eyes narrowed, “She has a bruise on her arm the size of Iowa-”

“She’s lucky that’s all she got,” Says your Dad.

You stare at him for a moment. Then stand.

“I’m not talking to you if you’re going to be like this,” You say, voice hot.

Your Dad hesitates. Then puts his arm out to draw you back down.

“I’m sorry,” He says, and although it’s through gritted teeth, he does sound like he means it, “I shouldn’t have grabbed her. I’ll apologize to her.”

You blink.

“Thank you.”

Your Mom reemerges, cups of hot tea in hand.

“Darling,” She says, “Please. Sit down.”

You settle back into your seat, phone buzzing in your hand. It’s Tara.

In Sheriff’s office with Sam, waiting for her to come back, it reads.

Then. It buzzes again.

You ok baby?

Fine, you message back, Dad said he’s sorry for grabbing u.

I’ll believe it when I hear it, Tara sends back.

Your Mom clears her throat.

“YN,” She says, “Can you put the phone down please? We need to talk.”

And talk you do.

Your Dad stays quiet while your Mom outlines her concerns. The plan, the manslaughter. Tara’s arrest. Her concerns are valid.

Yes, Tara had been arrested for murder. Murders that she had committed.

Yes, you’d set up a foolhardy plan with Tara’s friends to capture Ghostface.

And yes, you’d gone into that school knowing you were about to take someone’s life. And done exactly that.

You watch as your Mother tries to understand. And know there’s nothing you can say to quell her fears.

“I think we need to get you into therapy.” Says your Mom, chewing her lip, “We should have done it earlier. I’m sorry we didn’t do it earlier.”

You blink.

“I don’t want to talk to a shrink,” You argue.

You don’t want to talk to anyone about this. Talking led to answers, answers that you very much need to keep buried. For your sake, just as much as Tara’s.

“Please, honey,” Begs your Mom, “You haven’t been coping, that much is obvious.”

“I’m fine,” You say, leaning forward, “As fine as I can be. I know you’re upset about the plan, but Mom- it was the only way. I mean, look what he was doing to us. Dad carries around a shotgun like it’s his wallet, Tara was going out of her mind, and poor Sam is one more attack away from a nervous breakdown-”

“Exactly why you should talk to someone,” Says your Dad, quietly, “This isn’t normal, YN. Normal eighteen year olds are worried about which colleges they’re going to get into. Not about if they’re going to be attacked in their homes in the middle of the night.”

He pauses.

“And it wouldn’t hurt Tara to go, either.”

Annoyance flares up in your chest.

“Can you stop going after Tara?” You say, suddenly on edge, “She’s done nothing to you, Dad. All she’s done is protect me, and you’re acting like she’s been abusing me or something-”

“There’s something not right about her,” Your Dad says. His brows furrow, like there’s something he just can’t quite work out, “YN, she treats you like you belong to her.”

“I do belong to her,” You say immediately, and then regret it almost instantly. Your Dad’s face contorts in anger. Hurriedly, you walk it back, “I mean, she belongs to me too. I’m her girlfriend. And she’s mine.”

“Honey.” Your Mom is looking at your Dad, a serious look in her eye. Like she’s trying to warn him off saying the wrong thing.

You watch his fists ball.

“Nobody belongs to anyone,” Your Dad says, “You’re not a piece of property. See, this is exactly what I mean. Any shrink worth his weight will tell you the same.”

“I’m not talking to a shrink,” You say, voice raising, “You can’t make me.”

Your Dad stands. His voice is like thunder.

“You’re my child and you’ll do what I say,” He says, familiar vein popping out of his forehead.

You sink back into your seat, crossing your arms, “I thought I didn’t belong to anyone?” You say, voice flat.

Your Dad takes a deep breath. The way he usually does before he’s about to launch into a tirade.

His hand raises, and he points a finger at you.

And then his face freezes.

It’s unmistakable. A loud shattering, like a glass has been dropped. Your Mom’s face falls. You blink, head turning to see where it had come from.

“What was that?” Your Dad says, turning from you, suddenly on guard.

It had sounded from the kitchen. Butterflies soar within your stomach, but not the good kind. The kind that feel like you’re being eaten from the inside out.

The back of your neck prickles. And then your heart almost leaps out of your chest as you feel your phone buzzing in your hands.

It’s Tara. Her pretty smile flashes across the screen. You gulp, silencing your phone with a click of your button.

“The gun,” Hisses your Mom, “Get the gun.”

Your Dad fumbles around behind the sofa. He pulls out his shotgun, posies it against his chest.

“Who’s there?” He calls out, but his voice shakes, “I’m armed. I have a weapon.”

Silence.

Your Mom grabs you by the arm, pulls you back against the wall.

“Stay here,” Your Dad says, cocking the shotgun.

“Dad, don’t-” You hiss, as you grab your phone. It’s buzzing again, Tara’s name flashing across the screen, “I’m going to call the police.”

But he doesn’t listen.

He draws closer to the kitchen, step by step. Your Mom’s eyes are wide, fearful, as she clings onto your arm for dear life.

You press your phone to your ear, answer Tara’s call.

“Babe-” She says, voice urgent, “Stay where you are, I know who Ghostface is.”

But you barely hear her. Your heartbeat is thundering in your ears, fire flooding through your veins.

“He’s in the house,” You say, breath caught in the back of your throat, “Tara, he’s here-”

The crunch of your Dad’s boots against the kitchen tile. You watch as he disappears out of sight. Tears spill wet down your cheeks. Your Mom’s grip on your hand is so hard you feel as if she might pull it clean off.

“Baby, I’m coming,” Tara says. She’s out of breath, like she’s running, “Sam- drive.”

“Call the police, Tara, please,” You whisper, voice a beg, “Call the police right now.”

“Stay on the line, babe,” Tara says. You hear the click of the car door, and Sam’s voice. Urgent. Desperate, “We’re coming right now. We figured it out - Ghostface is-”

But you don’t hear what she says.

Your Dad disappears into the kitchen for less than a second. Another loud crash sounds, then your Dad cries out.

The shotgun blasts.

Your Mom screams.

Your ears ring as you drop your phone to the floor, the screen smashing instantly.

“Dad?” You call out, hands shaking as you move your Mom behind you, “Dad, say something. Are you okay?”

But he doesn’t say a thing.

Blood pounds through your body. Your mother starts to cry. Adrenaline floods through you.

And suddenly you know exactly what you need to do.

“Run.” You tell your Mom.

Your legs feel like jelly as you sprint through the living room, your Mom close behind. You make it to the foyer, looking behind you wildly in an attempt to see if anyone’s behind you. You press your hand against the handle and attempt to draw it open.

But it stays firm, locked.

“It’s the alarm system,” Says your Mother, face thick with tears, “The house is on lockdown, Daddy set it up to go through our phones.”

“So get your phone out.” You hiss.

She fumbles around in her pockets and draws out her phone. You watch the hallway. It’s quiet. Eerie. No sign of your Dad, and no sign of anyone else. You eye the living room window, thinking.

“It won’t unlock,” Your mother says, voice frantic.

You seize the phone from her hands, fiddle around in the app. UNLOCK is near the center, a bright green button. You press it once. Then twice, but nothing happens.

As if it’s been overridden.

“Window,” You mumble, “Mom, get to the window. I’ll break it.”

It happens in a flash.

One moment you’re dropping her phone to the floor, in an effort to grab her hand and run.

And the next, you see him.

Black cloak. Mask pulled over his face.

Your Dad’s shotgun in his hands. Blood coated over his gloves, gleaming in the daylight.

“Run!” You scream out.

Your Mother sprints. Ghostface raises the weapon, lets out a single shot that rings out heavy into the air. It misses, flies off into the wall behind you.

“Don’t move.” Says Ghostface, voice contorted, “Move and you die.”

But you don’t listen. The gun isn’t reloaded - you don’t know much about weapons, but you’ve seen your Dad shoot it before. You tear off, ignoring his angry cry out as you follow your Mom into the living room.

Your Mom grabs a nearby lamp, flings it wildly at the window. It shatters, almost as loudly as the shotgun. Pieces of broken glass litter the carpet, but it's the least of your worries.

You leap over the couch, take your Mother’s hand and lead her to the window.

And then, out of the corner of your eye, you see him again.

He’s loading pellets into the shotgun, and then, with a quiet click, he raises it once more.

But he doesn’t point it at you.

“Mom!” You scream.

Another blast sounds out. You grip either side of your head, ears ringing painfully at the sound. Your mother screams, and then falls to the floor.

Blood spills thick and fast onto the carpet.

You drop down, watch in horror as you catch sight of the wound. It’s gory, bloody, half of her leg blasted clean off. She wails, eyes wide in agony, clutching at her leg as if it will fall off if she lets go.

“Mom.” You sob. You grip her shoulders, in a feeble attempt to drag her to the window.

You should run. You should leave her and run.

But you can’t.

She’s your Mother.

And it’s just the distraction Ghostface needs.

Your Mom looks up at you, mouth open in horror as sees him, looming behind you.

“YN!” She cries out.

But you don’t turn in time.

You feel the hard press as the back of the shotgun slams against your head.

And then everything turns black.

You feel like you’re floating.

Over the earth, mind dizzy, like you’ve been launched into space without an oxygen mask.

There are stars behind your eyes. The back of your head aches, unpleasantly. You can feel something wet against the back of your neck, trickling down underneath your shirt. You groan, move your hand to wipe it away.

And then you realize your hands are bound behind your back.

Panic surges through you as you remember your last moments of consciousness.

Your Dad, walking into the kitchen with a shotgun. The bang of the bullet.

Your Mom, screaming, writhing in pain on the living room floor, shotgun pellet in her leg.

Ghostface.

You open your eyes, chest heaving.

Everything’s fuzzy, blurred. It hurts to look. The room is dark, save for a single ceiling lamp, flickering as if it’s down to its last few minutes of light. You squint, trying to make out your surroundings.

You’re in a basement, maybe. It’s dirty, dusty. Unused. Somewhere completely unfamiliar.

A wave of nausea floods through you.

Your head pounds. The wetness seeping down onto the back of your neck is blood, you realize all at once.

Your phone is broken, gone.

And Ghostface stands in front of you, shimmering dagger in his hands.

You tug at your restraints, hysteria surging through you.

Ghostface has taken you somewhere. To his house, maybe. To somewhere the police, and Tara won’t be able to find you. There’s no sign of your mother, or your father.

It’s quiet.

The only sounds are the desperate fidgeting of your hands and the heavy noise of his breathing.

But it’s hopeless.

Your hands are bound too tight. You have no weapon, and you feel light. Dizzy. Like even if you managed to stand you’d pass out instantly.

It’s the end, you realize all at once.

He has you. And this is how you’re going to die.

You swallow, squint a little harder, ignoring the waves of sickness that flood through you.

And suddenly you only want to know one thing.

“Who are you?” You mumble, “Please. Tell me what you want.”

“Who am I?” Ghostface says. He tilts his head, and you can hear the sneer in his voice. He drops his dagger, then curls his fingers around the edge of the mask.

It pulls off in one clean swipe.

Gone is the mystery. The unfamiliarity.

Your heart drops.

You’ve seen this face before. Not once or twice.

You’ve seen this face so many times in the last twenty-four hours. You remember never wanting to see it again.

But she’s here.

She has you here.

Blood streaming down your neck, hands bound so tight your fingertips are starting to lose feeling.

She stands a little taller, drops her robes and tosses the mask to the floor.

Blonde hair, wide blue eyes.

The spitting image of him.

Sheriff’s badge pressed to her chest.

And suddenly it all falls into place.

She leans in, until she’s so close you can see the untamed lunacy in her eyes. She looks wild, deranged as she tilts the blade against your cheek.

There’s nothing in her eyes but pure, unadulterated hatred.

And then her lips curls as she spits out: “I’m the mother of the boy you murdered.”

#all hers #scream #scream vi #tara carpenter #jenna ortega #tara carpenter x yn #tara carpenter x you #tara carpenter x reader #jenna ortega x yn #jenna ortega x you #jenna ortega x reader #fanfic #mine

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blue-labcoat · 5 months

Text

You're not broken

summary: reader and spencer experience a miscarriage due to ectopic pregnancy

genre: angst, 2.3k

warnings: mentions of pregnancy, ectopic pregnancy, miscarriage, ambulances/hospitals, surgery, mentions of infertility

series masterlist here

a/n: me, updating this series after how long?? anyways, this was written with the information i could find on the internet about ectopic pregnancy and recovery, so it may not be totally accurate! read at your own discretion

A sharp pain in my abdomen woke me up. I could immediately tell that something was off - I was lightheaded and the pain in my lower stomach was getting worse.

“Spencer,” I whispered, reaching over to shake him awake.

“Hm,” he muttered, rolling over. I shook him harder.

“Something’s wrong, Spence. I don’t feel good, I think you should take me to the hospital.”

His eyes snapped open. “Are you serious? What's wrong?”

“I don't know. I can just tell that something's wrong, and I - ah!” I gasped out as another bolt of pain passed through my abdomen. “I'm in pain. And I- I don't know. I'm lightheaded. Something's just wrong.”

“Okay, it's going to be alright,” he said, getting up and walking over to my side of the bed to help me out. He pulled the covers off of me to help me get up, and gasped.

"Oh my god," he said softly, worry clouding his eyes. I followed his line of sight down to the sheets. There was a large bloodstain under my hips.

“Is that your period?” He asked. I shook my head, panic filling my chest. “Okay, let's get you to the hospital. C'mon, I'll help you to the car.”

I could hear in Spencer's voice that he was trying to stay calm for my sake, but I could see my own panic mirrored on his face. I stood up, and suddenly the room was blurry and spinning around me. I could feel my back getting clammy, and my heart was pounding in my ears. I fell against Spencer's chest, and felt him catch me and lay me back down on the bed.

I was drifting in and out of consciousness - I heard Spencer talking to someone, then I was somewhere with a bright fluorescent light shining over my head. The last thing I remembered was Spencer leaning over me, tears streaming down his cheeks.

---

Beep. Beep. Beep.

I opened my eyes slowly. “That noise is really annoying,” I muttered, closing my eyes again. It was too bright.

“She's waking up,” I heard someone saying. I didn't recognize the voice. I blinked my eyes open again, squinting so that I could take in my surroundings. I was in a hospital bed, with an IV sticking out of my arm.

“Spencer,” I called when I noticed him standing near the door.

“Hey, baby,” he greeted, coming over to stand next to me. “How are you feeling?”

“I - tired. What happened?”

Spencer's eyebrows drew together with concern, and he pressed his lips together. “The nurse is sending your doctor down to talk to you. She should be here in a minute.” He took my hand in his and squeezed it tightly, leaning in to press a kiss to my forehead.

Not long after, the woman who I assumed was my doctor came in.

“Good morning, Dr y/l/n,” she greeted me. “I'm Dr Keller. How are you feeling?”

“Tired, and confused. And please, call me y/n,” I replied, smiling politely.

“Alright, y/n. Unfortunately, I have some bad news for you. When you came in last night, you were suffering from some very heavy bleeding, and we eventually determined that you were miscarrying an ectopic pregnancy.”

“Miscarry- no, that can't be right,” I told her, shaking my head. “I'm not pregnant.”

“It's possible that you didn't know about the pregnancy - your partner didn't either, obviously, when he came with you in the ambulance. But, the ruptured fallopian tube was what was causing your pain and blood loss. Your fallopian tube was ultimately too damaged to salvage, so we had to remove it along with the ectopic tissue.”

My lip quivered. “I was pregnant?”

She nodded. “I'm so sorry, y/n. We can discuss in more detail what this means for you once you’ve gotten some rest. I’m going to give you two a minute, and I’ll be back shortly in case you have any more questions, ok?” She left, and I burst into tears.

“I know, baby, I know,” Spencer soothed, crawling into the hospital bed beside me. I tucked my head under his chin and wrapped my arm around his torso as best I could.

“I - this is silly of me. I didn't even know I was pregnant, I shouldn't be so upset about losing something that I didn't even know I had,” I blubbered.

“It's okay to cry, y/n,” Spencer reminded me. “It's a loss like any other, and it's important that you grieve however you need to. We need to grieve.”

I cried even harder at his words. We had talked about how we both wanted kids at some point, but we hadn't discussed when. I knew how much Spencer wanted to be a dad. And yet, here I was, missing a fallopian tube.

“I'm sorry, Spence. I-” I paused, not even knowing what to say.

“It's okay,” he said softly, knowing what I was trying to say. “It's not your fault. It's not anyone's fault. We don't need to talk about it right now if you don't want, okay?”

I nodded, squeezing him tighter against me.

---

Two days later, I was discharged from the hospital and Spencer took me home. I was supposed to stay home for at least another week, but I wasn't ready to talk about it with Millie yet so I just sent her my doctor's note and told her that I wouldn't be in until I was feeling better.

“Did you want me to stay home with you tomorrow?” Spencer asked while we were eating supper. I shrugged.

“You don't have to,” I replied, looking down at my food and pushing it around on my plate.

“That's not what I asked,” he said gently, reaching over to lift my chin. “Y/n, this is happening to both of us, you know that, right? I just want to be here for you.”

“I know, Spence, I’m sorry,” I replied, finally looking up at him. “I just don’t know how I’m supposed to deal with something like this. And, I know this is hard for you, too, and I want to be here for you like you are for me, but I just feel so… heartbroken. I mean, we might never be able to have a baby now, Spencer. I’m broken, and nothing can fix it.” I set down my fork and willed the tears that were beginning to form away.

“Hey, hey,” Spencer cooed, pulling me into a hug against his chest. “You are not broken, do you understand me? You could never be broken. I know you’re scared, and I know you’re upset, but I need you to understand that this is in no way your fault. I love you no matter what, right?”

I nodded against his chest, wiping my tears away on his sweater.

“Besides, we haven’t even really talked yet about having children yet. I’m not saying that a baby wouldn’t have been a good thing, but it sure would have been a surprise! The other thing to remember too, honey, is that there are lots of different ways to have children. And when we do eventually have a kid together, we are going to love them so fucking much that it won’t even matter how they became a part of our lives.

“Just promise me you won’t push me away because of this, okay? I want you to take the time you need to recover from this, physically and emotionally, but I want to be a part of that recovery. We’re going to get through this together.”

I could hear him starting to get choked up. I lifted my head up to look at him, giving him a weak smile. “I’m sorry I snapped at you,” I told him. “I love you so much, Spence.”

“I love you too. Now. Try eating a little bit more, and then maybe we can crawl into bed early and cuddle for a bit before we go to sleep. Sound good?”

I hummed in agreement and turned back to my plate. “You can go to work tomorrow. I’ll be fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure. I’ll get caught up on my knitting, finish that book… it’ll be good.”

Spencer responded by leaning over and giving me a quick peck on the cheek.

---

The next morning, Spencer left on time, giving me a kiss and gentle hug goodbye and whispering ‘I love you’ while I was still in bed.

When I got up a few hours later, the incision from my surgery was sore. I hobbled to the kitchen to make a cup of tea, and was planning on returning to bed when I heard a knock at the door. Before opening it, I checked through the peephole only to find JJ on the other side.

“Hey, JJ,” I greeted her, opening the door and stepping back gingerly.

“Hi, y/n, is… Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, what do you mean?”

“Nothing, you just… never mind. Um, is Spencer here?”

My instinctual reaction was panic. Spencer had gone to work. He was supposed to be at work.

“No, he left for work at his normal time this morning. Didn’t he show up?”

“He did, but he left because he said that you needed him to come home. He didn’t say why, but he wasn’t at work very long.” She paused for a moment, looking at me closely. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I…” I wasn’t sure if I wanted anyone to know that I had miscarried. I had asked Spencer the night before not to tell anyone, and I wasn’t very close with JJ, but she was a mother. I suppose if anyone was going to understand, it would be her. “Can I tell you something, but can you not tell anyone?”

“Of course,” she replied, brows furrowing. “Did you want me to come in? I don’t have to, but-”

“Yeah, of course,” I interrupted, opening the door wider and stepping aside so that she could come in.

We sat down on the couch a few feet apart. I knew that JJ had been Spencer’s best friend before we met, but I’d never really gotten close with her.

“I had a miscarriage three days ago,” I told her after a short silence, looking down at my hands clasped in my lap, blurry from the tears that were starting to press on the back of my eyes. “I didn’t even know I was pregnant, we- we weren’t even trying or anything. It just hit me kind of hard, and they told me that I might not be able to get pregnant again, and I just… I didn’t even realize it was something that I wanted until I couldn’t have it, y’know?”

“Oh my god, y/n, I’m so sorry,” JJ said, reaching out to hold my hand. “Is there anything I can do for you?”

“I don’t think so,” I sniffled. “I didn’t mean to ambush you with this, I don’t even know why I wanted to tell you. I think I just needed to tell someone, just to get it out there?”

“I know what you mean.” JJ gave me a sympathetic smile. “We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want, but I had a miscarriage too. When I was overseas.”

“You did?”

She nodded.

“If you, um, don’t mind me asking, how did you get over it?”

“To be completely honest, it’s not really something you get over. I guess grief is different for everyone, but I find myself thinking every now and then about who that little baby might have grown up to been, or how my life would be different.”

---

JJ stayed for a few hours, talking at first with me about the miscarriage, but then just chatting. When she left, my mind went back to the hospital, the doctor’s words replaying over and over again in my mind. JJ being here had helped, though. I just had to get my mind of things for a little while until the wound wasn’t so fresh, and I could think through it. I turned on Gilmore Girls and decided to bake some cupcakes.

There was third batch of cupcakes in the oven and I was frosting the first when I heard Spencer’s key turning in the lock. I paused the tv and called out to greet him.

“Hey, honey,” he said, setting his bag down and walking into the kitchen. “It smells really good in here, but are you sure you’re getting enough rest like the doctor said?”

I gave him a peck on the cheek. “I had enough rest this morning. JJ came over and we chatted for a bit, but when she left I wanted to get my mind off it, so I’m making cupcakes. I’m almost done so I can rest after while I’m eating them.”

“I see,” replied Spencer, scooping some frosting out of the bowl and licking it off his finger. “Are you sure you’re okay, y/n? I mean, this was a big deal, and I don’t expect you to just move – ”

“I’m okay, Spence. I mean, not completely, but I’m managing okay and I know that it will hurt less with time. I just need to get there, so,” I gestured vaguely at the kitchen, “Cupcakes.”

“Okay, I’m glad. Promise you’ll let me know if you need anything?”

“I promise, Spence. Now, stop eating the icing and go sit in the living room. I’ll bring you a cupcake when they’re done.”

He dipped his finger back into the bowl one last time, giving me an impish grin before walking over to the couch. “I love you, y/n.”

#criminal minds #criminal minds smut #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds angst #criminal minds fluff #spencer reid #spencer reid x fem!reader #spencer reid x reader #spencer x reader #dr spencer reid #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid smut #spencer reid series #spencer reid fanfiction #friends to lovers

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doyouknowbtsswag · 9 months

Text

Do You Remember? |Chishiya|

Part 2

I wanted to cry holding my side that was currently bleeding. I tore part of my shirt and wrapped it around trying to stop the bleeding. I looked around for Chishiya wanting to be with him as the world fell apart. I spotted him propped against a car. He was looking up at the sky unbothered by anything around him.

"Chishiya?" I called out which made him lazily look over.

"( Y/n)?" I heard him say his eyes widened.

"I'm so glad your okay" I teared up slowly making my way to sit next to him. I winced trying to sit down. He slowly guided me down to help me sit to prevent more pain as I held my side. "I thought you died"

"You should know I don't give up that easily." He smiled lazily before stopping looking at my side.

"Nasty isn't it" I chuckled in pain.

"Your gonna bleed out," He said panicking wincing himself as he moved.

"Hey hey" I stopped him from trying to push on my wound to stop the bleeding.

"Stop," He said as he fought back my hand.

"You're hurting yourself," I said finally getting his hands fully off of me holding them tightly. "You're injured too"

"I don't care your more important to me" He placed his forehead on mine. "I can't lose you and let you die"

"I'm always going to be by your side " I rubbed his hand.

"I wish we met before all this so we'd have more time together"

I felt tears streaming down my cheeks making Chishiya pull our faces away.

"Don't cry sweetheart" He said cupping my cheek with one hand and keeping one on my hand but I could see him holding back tears himself.

"I can't help it"

"We'll get out of this" He wiped my tears from my face. "And see each other again"

"Thank you" I whispered.

He smiled lightly and put his lips on mine. I kissed him back and I could tell this wasn't going to stop anytime soon. Our emotions were displayed all at once. It captured love, passion, and a hint of sadness knowing this could be the last. I laid my head on his shoulder and intertwined my fingers with his. The sky blue contrasted to the depressing ground. Chishiya ran his hand through my hair as we sat in silence. The silence was cut short as fireworks spewed out of the dark sky.

"All surviving players will be presented with two choices Players must now all decide whether to accept permanent residency in this country or decline it."

I smiled and squeezed his hand.

"I decline"

"You better not forget me" I joked.

"How could I ever forget you?"

"I love you" I kissed his cheek.

"I love you too."Not too long after I said that my sight was blurry until the world turned dark.

I woke up confused with a major headache. I looked around and saw curtains and white walls. I heard a beeping sound and looked next to me. I was hooked up to a monitor that showed a steady flow. I was indeed in the hospital. The last thing I remembered was walking to the mall holding a Starbucks cup I couldn't even think of how I ended up here, I wasn't near the road so I couldn't have been ran over. I pressed the red button next to me to alert the nurse I was up. A few minutes later a nurse came in and asked how I was feeling and explained what happened. She told me I could walk freely as long as I took my IV with me. If I felt dizzy or tired sit down immediately.

"Thank you" I smiled.

"Just make sure your back in your bed by 8 okay?" She said.

"I will"

"Oh! Your friends dropped off clothes for you"

"Really?" I asked happy I wouldn't be in a hospital gown.

"Would you like to change into them?"

"Yes please" I nodded.

"Your friends mentioned your parents aren't in town so they dropped them off"

"I'll have to thank them later"

"Do you think you'll need help?" She asked.

"I should be fine"

"I'll be behind the curtain so if you need help let me know"

Thank you" I smiled taking the IV out as she closed the curtain behind her.

I looked at the clothes and started changing but stopped looking at my patched-up side. I sighed and continued changing wincing a few times. I opened the curtain and let the nurse in. She walked over to grab another IV for me to take around. She rolled up one of the sleeves.

"1 2 3," She said and injected the IV in my arm.

"Remember what I said before. I'll see you at 8"

"I hope the food is decent it seems like I'll be here for a while" I sighed as the nurse left.

I got up and started walking observing how many people were around me. I slowly opened the door wincing slightly. I walked down the hallway and saw vending machines. I didn't have any money because my purse was apparently burned to death. I frowned but walked to the front desk shamefully asking for a dollar. I explained why and they gave me one as I kept thanking them till they smiled. I walked to the machines and got my favorite drink. I opened the can and made my way to their garden. As I did so I walked past a blonde who also had an IV. I felt like I'd seen him before, I looked back and saw that he was gone.

"It doesn't feel as stuffy anymore" I sighed in relief sitting on a bench that was in the garden. "I feel like I've met him but It's not possible maybe he was one of my friends' ex's?."

I took another sip from my drink and watched little kids run around freely making me smile softly. "Nothing makes sense anymore." There were so many people I walked by that seemed familiar but the blonde stood out the most. I put my head in my hands annoyed.

"Can I sit here?" I heard a voice say a familiar one.

I looked up and saw the blonde who was also carrying a IV around.

"Uh sure," I said maybe this could help jog my memory.

He just sat looking ahead as I gazed at him from the side trying to put pieces together. I looked at him up and down before noticing the outline of gauze wrapped around his side. He looked over and saw me staring which made me quickly look away. He gave a sly smirk I've definitely seen before.

"So what are you in here for?" He asked.

"The meteor accident and you?"

"Same thing, did your heart happen to stop beating?"

"Yeah I assume yours too"

"Yeah someone else next to me had the same problem"

"You really unbothered by this situation" I chuckled. "Especially since you could've died."

"You should know I don't give up that easily." He said which made my head pound.

I closed my eyes holding my head seeing debris and an abandoned-looking road. I opened my eyes my headache started to go away he looked confused but held out my drink for me.

"Are you okay?" He asked as I took the drunk from his hand which gave me butterflies.

"Yeah sorry the nurse did say I would get headaches" I reassured him but I was confused about what I saw.

"Just making sure"

"Thanks" I smiled. "This is going to sound really weird but have we met before?"

"I don't remember," He said looking ahead unbothered.

"You just seemed familiar that's all" I cringed on the inside.

"Well I'm going to go get something to eat," He said standing up and stretching. "Maybe I'll see you around"

"Bye," I waved smiling. I watched him walk away into the building.

I decided to go back to my room and lay down my head still hurting from whatever just happened. I got up and grabbed the can of soda to throw out. I walked to my room the hallways almost empty because of the time of day. Once I made it to my room I laid down looking at the ceiling. Maybe if I close my eyes and focus I could figure it out. Now thinking about it I forgot to ask him for his name. I put my blankets over myself and got comfortable. My eyes got heavy and I fell asleep into a dream land.

I walked along the cracked road kicking rocks every once in and while. I heard a chuckle next to me. I looked over and saw the blonde next to me. He wrapped his arm around my waist as we walked closer to a game. Once we made it he let go and grabbed a collar handing me one. I nervously put it on scared of what the game would be.

"No matter what stay by my side" He whispered looking at the other players.

"What if it's a Heart game?"

"Then I guess you'll win" He shrugged unbothered. "I don't think it is though"

"Why do you say that?" I asked.

"The atmosphere, the cells" He pointed out. "I highly doubt it is"

"I'll take your word for it"

—

"Well what are we gonna do"

"I have a plan," He said putting his hand on my shoulder. "Don't worry sweetheart"

"Chishiya everything is set to go"

I jumped awake my head pounding out of control making me feel sick. I aggressively hit the red button for the nurse to come in. I waited and waited and waited. I pressed the button again and finally, a nurse came in.

"Is everything okay?" She asked.

"Can I have Ibuprofen or something like that? My head is pounding"

"Of course! Let me go get you some"

I was dazed and confused knowing that it felt too real to be a dream. The places I was at and the interactions felt weird. All the people I saw with bathing suits on including me and him. The nurse popped back in and handed me water and pills. I took the medicine and set the cup next to me.

"Would you like something to eat? You haven't eaten dinner you fell asleep early"

"I'm not really hungry Thanks for the offer" I smiled

"Alright well get a good night's sleep," She said and walked away.

I tossed and turned all night till the sun woke up. Every time I closed my eyes new faces popped up more memories of me and Chishiya. I enjoyed some of them but others freaked me out. The sun hit my face and I was awoken by the nurse who changed out my IV.

"Your taking a little bit to heal fully but this should be the last day," She said and we both went on our separate ways.

I didn't feel as weak which was a good thing. It was a lot easier to walk around and I barely felt any pain. I walked to the cafeteria starving from not eating. On my way there I saw the people in my short clips of when I closed my eyes for a few minutes and closed them. Once I got my food I sat in a random booth. How would I tell Chishiya what actually happened? How did I suddenly know his name? How do you even explain you played in games so you didn't die? How we literally dated? What would he say? I placed my head on the table defeated.

"You don't have many friends do you?" I looked up nervously.

"I have no- no you have no idea what you're talking about," I said stumbling over my words.

"So why were you sitting alone?" He teased.

"Because I wanted to," I said avoiding eye contact.

"You're acting weird. I'm a doctor but even if I wasn't anyone could tell.

I closed my eyes and put my head on the table again to avoid him from seeing my face.

"Shuntaro Chishiya" I whispered.

"What?"

"Your name is Shuntaro Chishiya," I said looking up trying to keep a straight face.

"How did you-"

"So I am the only one who remembered" I chuckled lightly thinking back to when he said he wouldn't forget me. "You lied to me

"What do you mean by that?" He asked confused.

"It's nothing," I said faking a smile. "So do you even have any recollection of what happened?"

"What happened in borderland?"

#chishiya shuntaro #chishiya x reader #aib chishiya #alice in borderland #aib arisu #usagi alice in borderland #aib x reader #aib x y/n #alice in boderland x reader #chishiya x y/n #chishiya alice in borderland #chishiya imagine #chishiya x you #chishiya fanfic #chishiya x fem!reader

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solarswonderland · 8 months

Text

dear hanbin

pairing: gn!reader x s.hanbin

wc: 0.5k

genre: fluff, highschool au

warnings: nothing really, just hopeless kids in love

summary: writing a love letter to him

a/n: ive never written anything like this before, I'm actually pretty proud of it. please lmk if it was alright 😓😓

*y.i: your initials

you were always a pen-and-paper person.

you didn't like typing down reminders or to-do lists, you preferred writing them down. there was just something so special about writing to you. probably the way you'd have to shake your pen occasionally because you ran out of ink. or the satisfaction you gain when you scratch out a completed task.

which is probably why you're standing in front of sung hanbin's locker, holding a carefully sealed envelope, decorated with hearts and small stickers you found stuffed deep in your desk drawers.

sung hanbin was truly not real, you thought. there was no way that man was real. he was just too good to be true. the adorable smile, the way he helps everyone around him, how he never got mad, how generous, smart, and nice he is. not to mention, he is incredibly handsome as well. it's no joke, everyone was in love with him. which is one reason you were always too scared to ever confess.

but if there was one thing you were confident in, it was your writing. you figured, since you can't form proper sentences in front of him, why not pen down your thoughts in the form of a letter instead? and that's exactly what you did.

you made sure no one was watching you and slipped the envelope into his locker. you breathed a sigh of relief and made you way to your next class.

after you were gone, hanbin made his way to his locker after basketball practice. he opened it and was startled to see a blue-colored envelope fall out. he grabbed it off the floor and opened it. he thought it might have been mistakenly placed in his locker, but instead was surprised when he read the first two words.

dear hanbin,

it was addressed to him after all. although he was tired and sweaty from practice, he was curious. he continued reading the letter.

dear hanbin,

my heart is racing with a mixture of excitement and nervousness, there are so many words i've been wanting to say to you for years, and i finally have the chance.

from the moment i met you in middle school, when you lent me your pencil because i forgot mine, i've liked you. who knows, maybe its love?

your smile lights up my darkest days, and you have never once failed to make me laugh. every interaction, no matter how small or big, is etched into my memory, replaying over and over again like a broken record. i've admired your kindness, your intelligence, and the way you effortlessly make everyone around you feel at ease.

i want you to know that my feelings for you have not faded with time, if anything, they've grown stronger.

i understand that this letter might come as a surprise, and let's be honest, life's unpredictable. but i couldn't hold back my feelings any longer than i already have. whether fate leads us down a path of togetherness or friendship, i just needed you to know the truth that has been in my heart for so long.

no matter what your response may be, i'll respect it. no matter where life takes us, know that you'll always hold a special place in my heart.

with love,

y.i ♡

he smiled to himself as he read it. just as he was closing the letter after re-reading it over and over again, he saw some text in the back which made him laugh.

do you like me?

□ yes □ no

no pressure, you don't have to tick anything right now :)

sorry that's kinda creepy isn't it

i should probably stop writing...

he grabbed a pen and ticked the 'yes' option, quietly giggling to himself.

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bonefall · 4 months

Note

Since she was mentioned briefly in the previous post- can Fernstripe and Sunbeam have at least a single conversation together? Something like “hey, what were your trials like and what should I expect?” It doesn’t have to give anything away by having her go “my trials were done under Bramblestar, not Squirrelstar, I can’t promise our trials will be remotely similar”. Though I just want Sunbeam to have friends outside of her in-laws and it’d be cool to see Fernstripe do something outside of “oh yeah she exists” without her actually appearing.

Fernstripe and Shellfur got blorboified. They're one of my favorite background character ships entirely because of BB additions, lmao

They bonded over Shellfur asking her for "niceness lessons," because Spotfur wasn't going to have her husband's bully of a brother know his nespring if he didn't figure his shit out.

I used them for framing what a Gathering and Aftergathering look like at the Lake

Fernstripe can't cook for shit

I am once again, much like a firm guardian telling the kiddies to not get too attached to all of the foster kittens we're sponsoring, saying that I can't say how exactly I'll be using Fernstripe in ASC quite yet. But I CAN promise you for sure that she is going to have waaaaay more of a role.

Both as a fresh migrant to ThunderClan just like Sunny-B, and also as a member of the Graykin family through her mateship to Shellfur. The Graykin family gets a lot more focus in BB because I can't be normal about them.

Assorted thoughts;

I want Sunny to have a bit of a concern, through Fernstripe. See, SHE belongs because she's mates with Shellfur. But what would that mean for Sunny if Nightheart never comes back?

Fernstripe should be someone that Sunbeam gets to know very well, if I do end up going to her having more agency over "constructing" teams of cats for her trials.

And she explicitly should realize, "Fernstripe is my friend which makes me want to pick her; but she's intelligent, not powerful. I can't put her on any tasks that involve that."

"............or anything food-related. of course. good lord"

Someone will mention that Fernstripe was grandfather-claused under any revision that bumped up the 1 task to 3. Most of ThunderClan is pretty openly rolling their eyes about even the 1 task, so they're definitely not going to make Fern do 2 more.

It's funny that there are now 3 cats with Fern prefixes in ThunderClan lmao.

And there's been even more ferns, historically

Brackenfur was named after a type of fern. His daughter, Honeyfern, was named after him before earning that Honor Title

Ferncloud just died, Spotfur named a kit after her (not graystripe), there's also Fernsong, and now Fernstripe. In Clanmew these are all different types of fern, but they're still ferns.

It should be a running joke in other Clans that they use "fern" as the prefix for random hypothetical warriors.

Kinda like how if you're talking about Americans you'll be like, "John Hamburger visits 200 diners a minute and consumes half of the world's oil," or if you're talking about Brits you're like "Kingsley Bigglesworth is repelled by spice like a vampire to the sun, must have an IV drip of blended beans-on-toast to survive."

"Fernface hears a cat sneeze across the lake, arrives with 15 clerics and a bowl of fruit juice they call "soup", cries when you don't say thank you more than twice."

Fernstripe must have been mortified when she realized that her parents named her Fern and then she ended up joining ThunderClan, lmao

#BB!Fernstripe #Better Bones AU #BB!ASC

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lanas-delight · 5 months

Text

from across the room.

♫ rec: about you by the 1975

✰ an enhypen scenario || gen!reader x jake

✰ description — a disastrous break up, raging arguments, fading love, and what could’ve been.

✰ warnings — language, arguments, mention and accusations of cheating, and a LOT of angst.

✰ note — u guys dont know me yet but i have been told im a mastermind when it comes to writing angst 😍 (ive js made my friends cry with what ive written before lolz) anyways enjoy! 🤭😅

Relationships never lasted with you. It was never your fault exactly, it was either them not being ready for it or just plainly doing you dirty, but you always moved on. It never phased you much, any of it, though that was because all of those people before weren’t him.

His name was Jake. You met him exactly two years and 23 days ago. Your two year anniversary was 18 days ago. You loved him, and he loved you. Everything was good. You were already living together, which happened about seven months ago, but there hasn’t been any issues. Everything was good—until it wasn’t.

“You’re kidding.��

“I wish I was,” Jake huffs, falling back onto the shared bed of yours. “Trust me, I hate it just as much as you do, maybe more,” he was referring to the business trip he was being forced to go on for a few days. He leaves tomorrow, and he hated that he would have to leave you again. This wasn’t the first business trip he’s ever been on, especially lately. He had gone on seven the last two months alone. You kept count.

"When will you be back?"

"Saturday?" He sounded unsure. "I'll call you once we get there, though," and he sat on the bed, putting on his shoes and tying the laces before continuing to pack his suitcase. You didn't say a word, only sat beside his suitcase and in hopes to reassure you, he leaned over and pressed a kiss to your cheek. You, however, just sighed and looked over at his direction, your eyes avoiding his, earning a puppy-like look from him. "What?"

"You sure have gone on a lot of trips lately," you remark, though quietly. He stares at you as you continue, "I'm worried, Jake."

"About?"

A sudden twist in your stomach, you felt sick. "Nevermind, I'll sound stupid," but he sits with you, worried and concerned terribly.

"No, what is it?"

You sighed again.

"Talk to me, Y/N."

"Are you having an affair?"

Jake laughed. He laughed. "What?" He scoffed, "Why would I ever cheat on you? Are you insane?" Such a kind thing to say to your partner, but he took it back instantly. "I'm sorry. That wasn't nice. It's really just a business trip, Y/N," he tells you, "I only love you."

"But how can I trust you?" You stood up, apart from him as he watched you with furrowed brows. "You've gone on so many, so often, you—You barely call when you're gone. How am I supposed to be sure you're not in bed with someone else?"

"Y/N," he shook his head, "If you don't have trust, we—"

"We have nothing, right?" And you turned, "Nothing new," You then walked off but he followed you into the kitchen, his packing coming to a sudden halt as he tried to make things right with you before he would leave. You grabbed some of the dishes and started to hand-wash them, while he stood near you and tried to reason with you.

"You're being ridiculous," he tells you, a bit rudely, "Why won't you listen to me?" But you ignore him. "Y/N, please. I don't want to leave with us like this. I love you—"

"Then prove it," You turned to him suddenly, "Prove that you love me, because you don't. You sleep in our bed for a couple nights then you're off on another trip. You kiss me but there's no love. There's nothing. There's . . ." You sighed, "There's nothing between us anymore. Because of you."

Jake took a step back. "Y/N, what are you saying?"

You pulled your phone out of your pocket and looked through your photos, showing him a screenshot you had taken off of Jake's phone. Messages with a girl who you didn't recognize, but when you messaged the girl, she swore they were just friends, that she had a boyfriend. But even that won't stop a girl sometimes. You didn't know how to feel, you weren't even sure if the messages had the intent of an affair. It was innocent chatting, you thought, but the fact he couldn't bring himself to look you in the eyes then made you realize the truth. It wasn't innocent. It wasn't a surprise either.

"I don't know why you talk to her, tell her everything while you tell me nothing, but if she's what you want, then she can have you." You threw a pot down in the sink, creating a loud noise to echo through the kitchen and the rest of the apartment as you stormed out, grabbed your coat and slid on your uggs. "I'm going to F/N's," you say, seeing him appear in the hallway behind you. "Goodnight, Jake." The door slammed behind you and you left, leaving the love you had once for him behind.

He called twice, left a voicemail, and sent over 30 messages, explaining everything. He didn't have feelings for that other girl, though he didn't give you any reason to think otherwise so you left that night. You didn't want anything to do with him. Genuinely, you didn't. You didn't know if he had actually cheated, though he claimed he didn't and that he would never do that to you, but he opened up to that girl about things you never even knew an ounce about.

She did have a boyfriend, but it wasn't until a week later that she texted you, telling you that she did like your boyfriend, which caused her own boyfriend to dump her. It wasn't surprising to you at all.

You had been staying at your friend's house for the last week, so when you finally called him back, you only asked him if he had any feelings for that girl. He didn't say anything. He hesitated, but he said no. However, that wasn't enough for you. You hung up on him and texted him that you were through. You asked him to have his stuff out of your apartment by next Friday, which he agreed to.

But on that Friday, when he was taking the last of his stuff, he stopped and looked at you coldly, unsure what to say but spoke anyways. His voice deep and hurt, just like his heart, just like yours.

"You didn't fight for us," he told you, "You didn't even care to listen to what I had to say. You leave every time it gets hard, you blame me for everything I do, but what am I supposed to do when you won't even hear me out, Y/N?"

"I don't know," You stared back at him with crossed arms, "Maybe don't cheat on me?" You scoffed, but he couldn't believe you.

"Why do you have to brush me aside like that?" Jake questioned, "You never listened to me. Have you even considered the possibility that I didn't open up to you because you didn't give me the chance to?"

You unfolded your arms, but you took his words the wrong way. "Are you implying I made you cheat on me?"

But that enraged him. "I didn't cheat on you, Y/N!" He raises his voice, throwing his hands in the air defensively, "I talked to who I thought was my friend, about personal stuff because I couldn't bring myself to talk to you about it, so instead of just trusting me to tell you on my own, you go through my phone and accuse me of cheating on you."

"You hesitated," you threw it back in his face, "When I asked you if you liked her, you hesitated before saying no. You had to think about whether or not you liked another girl while you were with me. Do you not realize how pathetic that made me feel?"

"Do you not realize how pathetic you've made me feel?" Jake remarks, tears in his eyes, mirroring yours, "I'm the bad guy in every part of this story, Y/N, because you won't even give me the chance to explain myself. You keep dismissing me and ignoring me, but why won't you listen to me? I love you with all I have, Y/N."

But you wiped your tears, sniffling. "I never want to see you again."

His eyes grew wide, but he didn't fight against it. He grabbed the last of his stuff and left without another word spoken between you both.

There was a party. You didn't know anyone but your best friend, but as she had gone off with her boyfriend, you were now alone, sitting on the couch, drinking liquor out of some plastic cup. You wore a red dress, made of satin, with heels that weren't too high that your ankles wanted to break but not too flat that made you appear too different from everyone else. You didn't want to be different, easy to single out. You wanted to fit in, just like everyone else. But you weren't like everyone else. That was clear the moment he saw you.

The room was crowded. You could barely see over dozens of people piled into one room. Music blaring, dim lights as one of your favorite songs started to play. People were dancing, people were drinking, having a good time like there was no tomorrow. And there he was, standing by the wall. You could see him through the small spaces between people. His eyes were glued to his phone screen for a fleeting moment, one that felt a little too long until he suddenly met eyes with you and in response, you smiled at him from across the room, while your heart jumped out of your chest and you had never felt more noticed in your life.

He approached you soon enough, breaking the awkwardness with a little joke before he sat beside you and started an easy-going conversation with you about what you did for work, what he did for work, etc. The night ended with a lightly-sober kiss between you both, where he said something so beautiful to you that you swore it was engraved into you. He said, "You are so pretty when you smile, but when it was just at me, like I was the only person in that crowded room, I knew it was you that I'm going to fall for." Five days later, after a couple of sober dates, he was your boyfriend. And for two years, you promised yourself that he was the one. Until he wasn't.

You had a dream once, that you married Jake and had a family with him. You had a couple of dogs, ones he and the kids all named like Scout, Georgie, and Layla the 2nd. You had your dream job, as did he, and you were just so happy with him and the kids. He had built you your dream house, with a concrete pool and a beautiful backyard that the kids would run all over in with the dogs. He had always promised you that he would anything for you—build you a house, give you the family you wanted, be the husband you needed. You loved him with your entire being, and he felt the same way about you.

But it had been five years since the break up. You haven't heard from him in at least four years, and the last thing you were told, he was engaged to some new girl and was moving back to Australia after the wedding.

You had met someone else, too. You had only been dating for a few months now, nothing too serious just yet, but you were just getting used to being in a relationship again. You were taking it slow, not wanting to rush anything.

You didn't have feelings for Jake anymore. You haven't loved him in years. But there's a part of that wishes that fate would lead you back into each other's lives, single and open for a second chance. But that was never going to happen. You were never going to be the one he stares at from across the room, where you smile at him and start the love that should have lasted forever, but it never stood a chance. You had moved on, and so has he. The memories of what love gave you both lingers in your eyes, your mind, and for the rest of your life, you'll know that it just wasn't meant to be. From across the room, you'll stay, and regret ever smiling at him for he became the love of your life, just as quickly as you left him. It was over. But you were okay.

You had to be.

———————————————————————————————

A/N - sorry guys i felt like hurting feelings today mb

#jake sim #jake x reader #enhypen #enhypen x reader #sunghoon #niki #jay #jungwon #sunoo #heeseung #enhypen angst #angst #jake #jay park #park jongseong #park sunghoon #kim sunoo #lee heeseung #niki nishimura

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teyamsatan · 1 year

Text

The Archer | Chapter IX: Safe and Sound (All is Found)

Chapter I Chapter II Chapter III Chapter IV Chapter V Chapter VI Chapter VII Chapter VIII Chapter IX Chapter X

Summary: You and Kiri wander into the unknown in your search for the eldest Sully, whilst he's forced to come to terms with his own mortality and make a choice between a comfortable past and an uncertain future.

Pairings: Neteyam x Avatar!Reader

Word Count: 10,5k words

Warnings/notes: angst (lots and lots of angst), mentions of death, blood, violence, cursing, some fluff.

A/N: Surprise! This is not the last chapter of The Archer!!! I tried to finish it, I really did, but there was no way to do it justice in just one chapter, so I hope you will be happy to know I am working on the actual last chapter right now and that should hopefully come out on Monday. We're almost at the end and I am incredibly emotional thinking of this series finishing, and I hope you guys have enjoyed coming on this 200k word journey with me. I love you all so so much and thank you for reblogging, for replying, for commenting and following, you mean the world. Enjoy x

↳ *Spotify playlist* ༉‧₊˚✧

Just close your eyes, the sun is going down

You'll be alright, no one can hurt you now

Come morning light, you and I'll be safe and sound

You had a miscarriage. You had a miscarriage. You had a miscarriage.

Even unconscious, the four words swam in your mind, unable to drown them out, their weight drowning you instead.

You had a miscarriage. You had a miscarriage. You had a miscarriage.

Neteyam knew then, clearer than ever, that something was wrong. This was all wrong. How was he in the forest? How were you here? How were you breathing this air? How were you so tall? When did they come back to the forest? Why was he always in between states of consciousness? What the hell was going on??

He pushed you off him and watched as you confusedly got up and try to shake off the nap with a wobble of your head.

“What the hell, Neteyam?”

His gaze hardened taking you in, taking whoever or whatever you were in, and he spoke angrily.

“Who the hell are you?”

“What do you mean who the hell am I? I’m me.”

“You can’t be you, because you’re human. You can’t be you because you’re as tall as a Na’vi girl and you’re breathing in our air. You haven’t been human in a long time. So who are you?”

He watched as you look at him intently, and your expression finally settled on a look of acknowledgement.

“Ah… you’re finally remembering.”

Neteyam battled a splitting headache as he tried to make sense of something that didn’t make any sort of sense in his mind.

“So, the memory of us in the marui, the morning of us waking up together, swimming, that is real?”

Your brows furrowed at his words, and you looked like you were thinking hard about your next words.

“I don’t know, Neteyam. It might have been real, it most likely was.”

“How can you be you and not remember? Stop fucking playing with me. I’m tired of this, I just want to know the truth.”

Your temper rose quickly, clear as day on your face, just like it always was - you’ve never been able to keep it at bay.

“I’m not playing with you, Neteyam! I can’t help you. I’m here for you, do you understand? You have to figure this out for yourself. I can’t say anything until you figure it out yourself.”

Neteyam sighed deeply, closing his eyes tightly and bringing his fingers to the bridge of his nose, trying to alleviate the headache that felt like would break him in two if it kept going. Think, Neteyam.

“Ok, then what can you tell me?”

“I’m here for you. It’s me. I’m just not… fuck. Not the me you know anymore.”

You looked scared as you pushed the last words out, and looked around you for something to happen, darting your eyes to the sky and to the forest enveloping you both. Almost as on command, he felt the world disintegrate around him and his vision dulled, and he knew he was going to sleep again. Your voice screamed at him as you were being pulled from his grasp once more. Don’t leave, don’t leave me again.

“Think of everything that’s happened since you arrived, play it all back. Think of your dreams. Just think, Neteyam. I’m here for you.”

You didn’t know how much time passed when you woke up, but you saw that it was light, so it was at least a few hours. The morphine drip was empty, as you were, and so the pain was back full force, reminding you what you had and what you lost. You had a miscarriage.

You had been pregnant. Your mind fluttered to the pills you kept by your and Neteyam’s mat, the pills you completely forgot about since the return to the tulkun, since the night Neteyam came in you, since you begged him to. The death of Roa and her calf took your attention away the next morning, and then all hell broke loose. You didn’t even know how long it had been since then. A week? A bit more? A week…

There are full years in people’s lives, decades in which life is dull, boring and uneventful. Unwavering truths and comfortable routines, you knew very little of. Your life was always a storm, always chaotic, always moving. Your life was adapt or die always and still, still, there were moments, unfrequent moments where even that chaos was subdued and middling - that was your peace. But then when chaos came, it was a tornado. It was a hurricane ready to tear everything in its path apart. There were no half measures in your life. No little disasters. Only death, only mass destruction, only loss so grave it burned everything good to ashes on the ground.

“Just fucking admit you don’t want to have my kids. You don’t want a family.”

“You know what? You are right. I don’t want a baby with you.”

You did this. You did it once more. You managed to ruin yet another thing in your life, like you couldn’t seem to be able to help yourself. Neteyam was in a coma because of you. Your dad was dead because of you. The baby you spitefully told Neteyam you didn’t want is gone, and you knew then even if Neteyam did come back, he would never forgive you for this. Because you put it out there, in the universe, in the wind, and Eywa heard you. And Eywa listened.

You forcefully removed all the needles in your body and made your way slowly, painfully towards your mate’s still body, and felt blood pouring from within you. Every step hurt so badly it was splitting you in half, and you remembered the pain of the virus slowly taking over your body, slowly eating you from the inside out and it felt like greeting an old, familiar friend. You said a silent thank you to whomever dressed you in thick loincloths that absorbed all the liquid spilling out, and sat down slowly next to Neteyam. You could hear voices from the outside of the marui, your family, whispering away, low voices almost like a hum, almost like a song.

“Neteyam…?” Crying came so easily to you recently it felt like second nature after all this time, so perpetual and constant, it felt like you spent more time doing it than not.

“I’m not trying to rush you or anything… but now would be a really good time for you to wake up. Just… just please wake up.”

“I’m sorry. I am so so sorry. I miss you so much, and I know you probably hate me, and I know you’ll probably hate me even more when you come back, and I am willing to accept it, I am willing to live my whole life earning your forgiveness, but I need you to be in it. I need you. Please, come back to me so I don’t feel so alone anymore.”

What was that?

A voice. Faint and echoed, barely there, but he heard it. Your voice. Your voice swimming in his subconscious, floating in his dormant mind, waking him up.

“I’m sorry. I am so so sorry…”

“…I know you probably hate me…”

“…I need you…”

Another dream enveloped him masterfully, tugging at him until he woke up, in the ship again - that damned ship. A dream he’s had before, a nightmare, horrid and anguished. He braced himself for the pain he already knew was coming, for the terror he’s had to live through so many times now he knew its every beat by heart. The humans. The Avatars. The guns - theirs and his. The noise as the bullets left, the way his mind stopped for a split second every time he heard someone go down because of him, because of his shots. The guilt eating at him, mixed with the anger and rage he felt for his planet, for these monsters, the fear for his siblings, for you, the sick hope that this could all be over soon. He felt it all, he lived it all - over and over and over. The sharp sting as a bullet pierced his body, in one way, out the other. The uneven stream of consciousness. Your body, his family’s bodies, sprawled all over him as he gave his last breath. He saw it all. He lived it all.

He lived it all. Not a dream. A memory.

A memory. His death was a memory.

You finally decided it was time to step into the light of the day outside your marui and face your family, although the thought of having to think about it, speak about it, watch them be sad about it close to made you pass out again. Regardless, you had to brave through it. You had to, because there was still a long road ahead. And you had a job to do now. You had to bury your dad, and then you had to go to the Spirit Tree. Everyone’s eyes shot up to your slow-moving figure as you approached them, a cocktail of emotions on their faces - from shock, to sadness, to curiosity and confusion, to grief, it was all the emotions you were feeling and didn’t want to anymore.

Lo’ak hurried to your side and took an arm and plopped it on his shoulders as one of his hands found yours, and the other your midriff, holding you in place.

“I got you, Angel.”

You smiled and looked at the side of his face and at the two beaded braids swinging with every step. “Thank you, brother.”

Multiple hands reached out to help you sit down, and you convulsed in pain as your body made contact with the floor.

“What are you doing out of bed?” Norm’s hand didn’t let you go, stretching your arm to look at it and tsk-ing at you annoyedly when he saw small purple marks where you yanked your IV needles out of your arms. The back of his hand then moved to your forehead, trying to gauge your temperature.

“Your fever’s down. How are you feeling?”

You were slightly shy at the small crowd of people staring at you, clinging to your every word. You wanted to lie, to say you were fine, but you didn’t have it in you to deceive these people anymore.

“I don’t know.” The tears that had stained your cheeks were long gone, but new ones weren’t far behind, as the weight of the past few days was slowly bearing down on you.

“In a few days, I lost a dad, a mate and a baby I didn’t even know I had. I don’t know how I am.”

You felt Neytiri’s arm on your back, slowly patting it up and down in an effort to console you. If anyone got what you went through, you imagined it’s her. Still, you felt so alone. More alone than you’ve ever felt in this life or the last. Even at your lowest, even that horrible whole 17th year, even that couldn’t compare. Nothing could compare to the catastrophic wave that crushed you like a tsunami and kept you there, unable to get up, unable to come up for air. You had so many people around you, so much family, and yet you’ve never felt more isolated.

Suddenly, you saw most of them get up and leave quietly, with only a slight tug of your shoulder or a kiss of your cheek or on the top of your head - all of them, except for Jake. He scooted over to where you were until his legs were parallel to yours and almost touching you. He looked at the water as he spoke.

“I thought you might want some peace and quiet.”

You nodded softly. “Thank you.”

“I’m so sorry, baby girl. I know there are no words, no words that could ever make this better, but I want you to know I am sorry.”

“Yeah… me too.”

His gaze shifted to the marui, and you followed his gaze to Neteyam’s body, resting on his mat.

“I miss him so much, kid.”

“I think he’s going to hate me, if he ever comes back.” You couldn’t help the way your voice broke halfway through the sentence.

Jake’s head snapped to you again, a confounded look on his face.

“What are you saying, kid? Why would you say that? My son could never hate you.”

“He’ll hate me. I know he will.”

Jake said nothing as he waited for you to continue. You cried softly as you tried to calm your mind by focusing on the fish swimming peacefully by your feet.

“Before the ship, before Payakan, we got into a fight. A big fight, probably the biggest we’ve ever had. The message, the one on the tulkun… I knew what it meant. I lied to you, to all of you. It was a message from my dad to me. He told me to meet him and I did, I went by myself at night.”

You didn’t look at Jake as you spoke but you felt his whole body stiffen next to yours, and there was no more warmth radiating off of him. Your heart was racing in your chest as you registered the changes and how mad he probably was.

“That’s when I forgave him… kind of. There was still so much unresolved, so much him and I still had to talk about. But when I came back, Neteyam was waiting for me. He was really mad, just like you are now. He… accused me of conspiring with the enemies, of putting him and your family in danger. He poured out all of his frustrations with me, including the one that hurt him most: that he felt I didn’t want a family with him. That I didn’t want his babies. I was so mad, so angry at how quickly he jumped the gun, how he always held so much in until it always exploded in my face, so I just told him that he was right. And that I don’t. And now I lost his baby. I lost his baby because of what I said, and he’s going to think it too and he’s never going to forgive me for it.”

Silence fell in between you, heavy silence, so heavy you felt its weight bearing down on you and the cries turned to sobs, the only sounds that could be heard.

“You know, kid, me and my family didn’t have the best relationship. A lot like your dad, I took to the military to get away from them all. Unlike your dad, though, I was the asshole. I was reckless and impulsive, and felt the constant need to prove myself. My brother, Tommy, he was the smart one. So smart, top of the class his whole life, valedictorian, model student. Got his PhD at 20, got the opportunity of a lifetime to come study on Pandora. A good kid, too. The perfect son, the perfect brother. I couldn’t stand it. The better he did, the worse I did. The more I wanted to prove how unlike him I was, how I was going to make my own path in life.” He scoffed at himself, at the memories of the past.

“I did well, too. In the army. I was good. I gained independence and everything I ever wanted. But I pushed them all away. My mother, and father, and Tommy. I didn’t see them for years. When I lost my legs and had to be shipped back, I was all alone. My fault, my own doing. I knew it, all along, how wrong I was, that all these people ever did was love me - and Tommy’s biggest fault was being a kind and compassionate person, a good brother. When he died, I felt empty. The guilt came later, it came at night, on Pandora, as I felt like I got another chance at life, a life I literally took from him. It came when I got accepted into the Clan, when I fell in love with Neytiri. It comes now, when I see the rivalry between Lo’ak and Neteyam and I know I created it. I see it when I see that Lo’ak is just a carbon copy of myself and my mistakes, and the more I try to steer him away the more I turn him into me. And I see Tommy in Neteyam, every day.”

“You can’t blame yourself for what happened, baby girl. There is so much you’ve had to endure, and no person in the world, much less Neteyam, would be surprised all the pain and stress took its toll on your body. You lost so much, and you gave so much to make sure Neteyam lived, how could he ever blame you? How could he ever hate you?”

“Throughout his whole life, both your lives, you have been Neteyam’s solace. His light, isn’t that what he calls you? I had to watch him lie to us and sneak out for years to come to you, no matter how much he inherited his distaste of humans from Neytiri, we still could never keep him away from that lab.” he chuckled to himself. “I had to watch him suffer for a year when he left, knowing there’s nothing I can do to help him - or you. I love my wife, I love her with my whole heart, more than I could love anything else, but the love you and Neteyam have, I’ve never seen anything like it as long as I have been alive. So I wouldn’t worry too much about it.”

“Wait… you knew about Neteyam sneaking out at night?”

Jake rose his eyebrow at you. “D’you think we’re stupid, kid? I mean it didn’t click from the get go, he had good excuses for a while, but after a few months, we realised he didn’t just have to… what did he used to say…?” He thought about it for a second. His eyes widened and finger wagged in the air as he remember. “Ah, yes! Release himself… for a few hours every night, ha! We were worried and we punished him the first few times we caught him, but it didn’t matter. So when we asked Norm and he told us he was there, safe in your room, we let it go. Did he never tell you?”

“No… he never told me.” He wanted to protect you, he didn’t want you to know he was being punished for sneaking out to see you.

“Wait… Norm knew too?” You groaned at the thought, your little bubble of privacy bursting suddenly.

“I know you like to think you’re the smartest person in the room, and you know what, kid? You are, but we’re not old, oblivious farts just yet.”

“Aw, pops. Never thought you were. Just thought we were being sneaky and getting away with it. Sorry.”

“Don’t apologise. The thing is, kid, neither you or Neteyam have ever really been children. And a lot of this is our fault… my fault. You were both forced to grow up much faster than you should have. You’ve both always known your own minds and hearts very well, and we knew quite soon you were inseparable. Keeping you two apart would have been as easy as parting mountains, so eventually we just let you be.”

You smiled a little at Jake’s confession, and sighed deeply as soon as you thought about Neteyam again. About the horrible circumstances that led to this conversation.

“What if I won’t be able to have children again? What if this was my only chance? Our only chance?”

He laughed a little and took you in his arms, and your head was now in his chest, crying quietly.

“I wouldn’t stress about that, kid. I think between the two of us, me and Neteyam will be able to coach our own football team soon.”

“Ew, gross.”

He laughed some more, a real dad laugh, and you did too, surprised that he somehow managed to elevate your mood.

Later, in the tent, the two middle siblings rejoined you as you were being checked by Norm and Max. You felt uncomfortable talking about this around so many people, your siblings, but you also wanted to be open, wanted to share in your pain and burdens, as you knew they wanted you to. You’ve kept to yourself your whole life, and this grief, the grief of losing Neteyam, of losing a baby that would have been their little niece or nephew, that you knew they would have adored and cared for every day of its life, you all had to suffer through together. So you allowed them to stay.

“How is the bleeding?”

“It’s manageable. Almost like a heavy period, I think?”

“That’s good. Let us know if it becomes worse, alright?” He eyed you intently. “Do you hear me, Ace? You can’t do what you always do, this is serious. You have to tell us.”

“I will tell you. I promise.”

“Good. Now, you have options. You can wait for it to pass naturally, or we can give you pills for it, but that will mean taking the helo back to the forest, we don’t have the pills with us.”

“I’ll wait.”

“…Alright. You will be bleeding for up to three weeks. Physical recovery from a miscarriage can take up to 2 months. That means no swimming, Ace.”

You shook your head.

“Ace…”

“Angel, you have to listen to them. You can’t put your health at risk anymore.”

“Zip it, Lo’ak. You of all people cannot give me a lecture on putting my health at risk.”

Kiri scoffed in Lo’ak direction, but turned to you, a stern look on her face.

“My stupid brother has a point. You have to stay here.”

“No, I have to bury my dad. And there’s one more thing I need to do. And then I’ll rest, I promise. No exercise for as long as you want, promise.”

“What else do you need to do?”

Your eyes flickered in between Lo’ak and Kiri, as well as the two scientists who all eyed you keenly. You wanted to tell them, wanted to so badly - deadly afraid of more secrets, more things to keep hidden deep in your soul until they burst out of you inevitably, leaving damage in their wake. But the thought of giving them false hope, the thought of seeing their spirit reborn as they hear Neteyam might be alright, might be within reach in Eywa, only to have it be taken away once more, killed you. It tortured you, it haunted you. You’ve spent your whole life having parts of your soul stripped away a piece at a time, so many years of being emptied out with every blow until you were a hollow shell of your former self - you were built for this. They weren’t. They had a life to live, a future to experience - endless adventures and happiness that you would make sure to protect and honour as much as you could. Because that’s what Neteyam did. Because that’s what siblings do.

At the same time, another thought, a worse thought gnawed at you - what if Neteyam was alright, what if you could bring him back, and you allowed his family to think of the worst, to assume their son, their sibling, their hero might never return to them? To make them stew in the pain that took so much from you, that gutted you and took your breath away, the pain that alleviated a little as soon as you chatted with Norm, it was cruel. It was winless fight, a lose-lose situation. But you knew if it was you, you’d want to know.

They deserve to know. They deserve the respect of being thought of as strong enough to handle themselves and the situations presented to them. They weren’t kids anymore. And they were never just any kids anyway. They were the kids of the Toruk Makto, of Palulukan Makto, of one of the greatest scientists that ever lived. They were Omatikaya kids, forced in fire. They had withstood wars and trials most people can’t even imagine. They were strong, and capable. You watched them grow up, you were there to watch them and love them, and now it was time to trust them.

“OK… Norm, can you stop that for a second? I need to talk to all of you.” Everyone was so focused on you, it was making you nervous. Thinking of Tsireya’s swimming lessons, you took a deep breath in and breathed out slowly, carefully, trying to imagine flickering a flame. You felt your heartbeat slow down in you chest and when it was normal again, you spoke.

“Before we were about to leave for my dad’s funeral, before… everything happened, Norm showed me something strange happening in Neteyam’s brain. A seizure.” Your eyes settled on Kiri. “A seizure like the one you went through at the Spirit Tree.” Kiri gasped slowly and took your arm, squeezing gently.

“That means…”

She’s always been quick, you thought proudly. “Yes. I think that Neteyam’s in Eywa. I think the seizures are visions… like the ones I got when I died. Now, I don’t want to raise your hopes up. I don’t know if it’s true. I don’t know anything. All I know is, it’s worth a try. So I will go and plug into the Spirit Tree after the funeral and try to find him and bring him back.”

“I want to come. I can help.”

You have to admit that you thought about it. You wanted Kiri to come with, her deep and unexplainable connection wit Eywa a possible advantage in your endeavour, but your mind flickered to her seizure, Max’s words ringing painfully in your ears. “If she seizes underwater again, it could kill her.”

Norm beat you to it. “Kiri, I don’t think you should plug into the Spirit Tree underwater anymore.”

“Look, I can do this.” She sighed, and looked at her fidgety fingers. “During the ship attack… I killed people.”

The same expression was mirrored in the faces all around you, deep concern and shock clearly visible in your eyes. “What?”

“I connected to some plants underwater and I… I used them to kill humans. I controlled them with my mind. Then I did it again when I was able to control glowing fish to find mum and Tuk in the ship. Something’s changed, guys. I can feel her, her power coursing through my veins. I can help. I can get us to Neteyam.”

Although taken aback, Kiri’s powers came with little surprise to you. You’ve guessed all along she had a bigger role to play than anyone could have ever foreseen, but to see her come into her own and discover them slowly, to watch it unfold, it was magical.

“A bleeding mess and a seizing mess, going together to revive our protective, loving, neurotic mess. How can this possibly go wrong?” You rolled your eyes, but were secretly happy you didn’t have to do this by yourself, that you had your sister to rely on.

Neteyam was gasping so loudly, panting violently as the memory faded. His eyes were unfocused and his lungs were on fire, and his hand shot to his chest at the pain that shot through him, feeling for a wound that wasn’t there, for blood that refused to spill. He patted himself and looked at his hand, and there was nothing. Nothing.

“You’re here for me.”

Neteyam’s whole body froze, eyes fixed on your own wide ones, just waiting to see the words that will come out of his mouth.

“I’m dead… I’m dead, aren’t I?”

Your eyes softened and then closed, taking a deep breath in and exhaling it slowly through your mouth. You nodded meekly. The tears that formed in your eyes only angered Neteyam, who felt his blood heating up in his veins until they bubbled, threatening to spill outside his body.

“I am dead and you have been toying with me, playing mind games and singing songs for Eywa knows how long?! What the fuck is wrong with you? Who even are you?”

You winced at his harsh words, the movement allowing for your tears to fall freely down you face.

“I couldn’t tell you, Neteyam. I’m not allowed to tell you. The last time I saw you, when you came to the Spirit Tree, I said too much and was immediately pushed out of your vision. Every time I said anything ever since you came back, you fell back into a liminal state of being and I was taken away.”

Neteyam’s head was spinning, world moving chaotically around him and he felt the need to sit, to ground himself to what he knew. He lowered his body next to the river bank, and allowed the water to rush over his calves, the murmuring sounds and rushing stream calming his nerves and heart. He didn’t look at you.

“Now that I remembered, can you just tell me?”

He heard your footsteps approaching behind him and you found a place on the floor next to him, one leg in the river while the other was bent at the knee, propped against his thigh. He saw your eyes tracing his side profile in his periphery and turned to face you, your beauty so overwhelming it made him ache. Seeing you with his memory intact, seeing you human for the first time in a year, your eyes and hair, your soft skin and beauty marks, your nose, your lips, it brought back feelings in him that he didn’t realise he even had. So much sadness for this you he’d lost, that he thought he’d lost forever, so much yearning to feel you, feel your much colder body, your more defined curves, your scent. So many memories of the girl he grew up with, so tiny and vulnerable, so fiery and wild, so sad and wise beyond her years, memories of the forest, his own upbringing, his own life. You were like a walking, talking reminder of the past, a past he loved, a past of joy, and love and adventures, of hope and childhood. A past long gone.

“Who are you? How is it possible that you are here? You are alive.”

You looked towards the river and sighed, thinking before you spoke.

“I’m me. I just don’t think I’m the same me as the one currently alive. I think when I did the consciousness transfer, a part of me, the human part of me, stayed behind. I’ve been here, in this forest, for a long time. I was so confused, for so long. I was just here, in this clearing, all alone.

And then one day, I got this dream. This horrible nightmare. I saw you, on a ship. I saw you fighting with Spider and Lo’ak, fighting humans and… blue men, like Avatars? I saw you getting shot. I saw you getting pulled to a rock. I saw you die, I saw myself losing everything in an instant.

Over time, I’d see glimpses. Of you, and your life. Of me. I saw the love, and the fights. I saw the late night ikran rides, and the passion so wild it could light the whole forest on fire. I saw your frustrations, and my own, grow in size. I saw us leaving, I saw us dreaming - for a future, a better one. One where we’d get to be free.

And then one day… you came. And I was so happy to see you again. And so scared. But I knew then that that’s why I’m here. That’s my purpose. My purpose here is you. I am here to be your light. To guide you. I just don’t know if I’m supposed to be guiding you back home or in the afterlife.”

Neteyam’s skin was littered with goosebumps at your words, at their implication, at knowing even in his afterlife, it was just you and him. You were his light, since the moment you were born and for the rest of eternity. He turned to fully face you, his pose mirroring your own now, and he took your face gently in both his hands, and wiped the tears from your warm cheeks with his thumbs. His face lowered to yours and your foreheads touched, the proximity almost unbearable in the feelings it invoked in him. He breathed you in and noted how unlike your Avatar body, you still smelled like the snapshots of the lab and of human concoctions you called perfume, sweet and mellow, and so, so familiar. You stood like that, motionless in this moment he didn’t want to ever end. If this was death, he was happy to oblige it, happy to indulge in it for the rest of time.

“I can’t believe it’s you. I can’t believe you’re here, that just like we talked about when we were 8, this is our heaven. That we can be in here together.”

“Neteyam… you can still go back. You can still choose to live.”

Neteyam removed his forehead from yours and looked at your eyes, sad and willing him to listen, to hear you out. Your hand wrapped around his wrist and you started caressing up and down his forearm in a consoling motion.

“What?”

“I had a choice. And so do you. I was so scared when I first saw you, but so relieved at the same time. I have been alone for so long, and you are the only one, the only one I ever wanted to see again. But I knew that if I were to ever see you again, that would mean my dream came true. And that scared me. That terrified me more than anything else. And if not seeing you again, being alone for all eternity was what it took for you to live, then I was happy with that. So I warned you, the best I could, but I was pulled out of the vision, and so were you. I realised then there are rules to this.

You have a choice to make, Neteyam, just like I did. No one can change that, no one can alter it. It has to come from you. You had to be able to remember you died, to remember what brought you here if you were to make that choice, and I couldn’t help you get there. Eywa doesn’t take sides.”

Neteyam was brought to a standstill. It was overwhelming, everything happening to him, everything he was going through and his mind finally remembered you, the real you, and his family that he left behind when he died. He felt so sick, so selfish having it just dawned on him that this didn’t just concern him. And although he had you, even in this life, you - the real you didn’t have him anymore. His parents, his siblings - they didn’t have him anymore.

“Can you see…? You said you get glimpses… of my life, of your life. Please tell me you’re ok. Please tell me my family is ok.”

You looked sad, so sad. Your lips pursed in a tight line and you shook your head slowly.

“Were you ok when I died?”

The immediate pain that he always felt as soon as he remembers the moment you gave your last breath in that lab, the power it still held over him even so long after, even whilst holding you taut against his body and feeling your strong heartbeat and looking into your eyes, that shimmered like the night sky, almost knocked him straight to the ground in agony.

“I had a choice. And so do you.” A choice. A choice between life and death. Between the future and the past. Between the ocean and the forest. Between his kids that he’s always dreamt of having, and the possibility of you never wanting your own. The choice between a happy afterlife or a scary, death-filled future.

“Did you know? When it happened to you?”

“Yes… I did.”

“You said you saw auntie Jo when you died. You said you saw Earth, and her old house. Why am I here?”

You smiled warmly up at him, tears making a temporary home in the two dimples on the side of your mouth.

“I think we go where we most want to go. I think we see what we longed for the most in life. The closer I got to dying, the more I needed my mum. I wanted to see her again, I wanted to see what her life was like, before me, before all of this. There was so much trauma I had because of her death, and it was the thing that my soul yearned for the most, I think. Just one last chance to hear her voice. For you… it’s this forest. What you wanted the most was to go home. And you wanted a family. You got to see the family we would have had that you envisioned when I was still human. Back before the Sky People returned, back before everything became complicated and messy. Back in the past, where our biggest concern was that we loved each other too much - too much for a human and a Na’vi.”

Neteyam thought long and hard about the situation he faced - that he found himself in. This choice, it was tugging at his heart painfully, it was tearing him apart. He thought it would be simple. It should be simple. Life or death, right? It’s as simple as it gets. Except death had everything he’s ever wanted and none of the things he didn’t want, none of the insecurities, and the pain and the fear, none of the uncertainty or the fights, none of the terror of thinking he might lose his family, he might lose you. None of the responsibilities, none of forsaken dreams, none of the forgotten plans. Death had you, the you he fell in love with, the you that he grew up with, the you that was ever-present in most of his most precious memories. Death had the kids, his kids, his perfect kids and the forest. It had this clearing, and happiness, and joy. It had peace.

He didn’t realise he was hyperventilating, tears blurring his vision until he felt your hand on his chest, over his heart, your touch bringing him much needed solace.

“Why is this so hard? Why does my heart hurt so badly?”

“I think it’s hard because you know deep in your heart what you want. You know what you want to do, and thinking about the consequences hurts you. But you have to say it, Neteyam. You have to acknowledge it.”

He didn’t think he could say it, could bring himself to admit it out loud. But he had to. He owed himself that, and the people waiting for him to come back.

“I don’t know if I want to go back.”

Right before eclipse, Jake and Neytiri returned to your tent, and with a deep sigh, you adjusted your clothes you have been wearing since before you passed out, and felt ready to finally do this.

“It’s time, baby girl.”

You nodded softly and felt grateful for your family, which was surrounding you on all sides, holding your hands and shoulders, making sure you knew and felt their presence and their support - both of which you needed desperately, especially now. You all got on ilu and started making your way in silence towards the Cove of the Ancestors. It would be your first time seeing it; you tried to suppress the wince that was threatening to escape you at the memory of the fight that ensued after you chose spending time with Lo’ak over coming to this place the first time, with your mate. What you wouldn’t give for those fights now, for any opportunity to see him and hear his voice ring in your ears.

As you entered underneath a few columns, you were speechless at the beauty, the indescribable beauty displayed for your eyes to see. Floating islands, and zenith arches stood tall and mighty as the underwater nature illuminated the cove brightly in kaleidoscopic hues. It was breathtaking, it was beyond your wildest dreams. Neteyam was right to be upset. You would have given anything to see this with him, and hated yourself a little at denying you both this once-in-a-lifetime chance.

The whole of the Metkayina clan was waiting for you, solemn and dignified, dressed in mournful garbs and intricate jewellery adorning their beautiful cyan bodies. Your dad was placed in a floating enclosure, filled with sea water and flowers, and emotion bubbled in your chest at his sight. Ronal, Tonowari and their two children looked at you and your family, and you greeted them in the Na’vi way, trying to pour every ounce of gratitude seeded in your soul to them, for the way they took your dad in, for the way they were offering him eternity in Eywa. I see you.

You took him and moved him slowly away from the crowd from the back of your ilu, and you made your way to the place you knew you would have to give him to the sea forever. His new forever home, where he could finally be free - free of burden, free of guilt, free of the world that took so much from him. Once you reached, you dismounted and saw with slight surprise as Jake did the same. You put your hands on your dad and he put his hands on yours, squeezing them gently.

“I got you, kid.”

You let out a soft sob at the gesture, feeling an outpouring of love for this man who was the only father figure you’ve ever known, the only father you had left, who stepped in at a time you were close to falling apart and helped you heal, and helped you where no one else could. With a small nod and a deep breath in, you submerged and slowly took your dad with you, to the seabed covered in yellow anemone. With one last goodbye and tears that got lost in the water all around you, you let him go, and watched as he was slowly engulfed in them, where he will rest for now, where he will rest for life.

Goodbye, dad. We’ll meet each other again, one day, and then, we’ll be able to finally be a family.

Gideon woke up in a bed, a bed he didn’t recognise initially. It had been so long since he’s been in this room, in this place. The realisation came from all around him, from the sound of songs he’s heard a million times before playing softly in the background, from the smell of a specific type of laundry detergent his nose was incredibly familiar with, from the cracks in the ceiling that Gideon memorised by heart in time.

“Up and at ‘em, sleepy head.”

The pressure of a small body tucked against him finally registered in his mind, and the voice brought clarity to everything, to his whole life and his whole existence. His eyes dropped to the ones already looking at him, playful and curious, and oh, oh so beautiful. The shock shot through his whole body, electrifying every inch of him, every part of his brain, waking him up like from a death sleep and into a weightless consciousness, fully alert to her, and only her.

“Marj?”

“I can’t believe you’re here. I never thought I’d see you again.”

“I don’t understand, Jo. Is this heaven?”

“It is now. Welcome home, my love.”

Once the funeral was over, the Metkayina slowly started making their way back to their village, as did your family.

“Will you be ok, kid?”

“Yes. I just want to see something at the Tree of Souls, if that’s ok.”

You looked fixedly at Lo’ak and Kiri, who nodded slowly, and you knew the plan was in motion.

“Ok, we will go back. We will see you back home. Don’t stay out late, you shouldn’t be swimming anyhow.”

“Will do. I’ll have Kiri and Lo’ak to keep me safe, just in case.”

Jake looked pointedly at Lo’ak. “Keep her safe. Safe. Do you understand?”

“Lima Charlie.”

The Metkayina Spirit Tree was a sight to behold, and even despite the pain and hurt, you were in awe of its majestic beauty. It was unlike anything you have ever seen before, and you were saddened at the thought your dad never got to see it. Your mum never got to see it. You think they would have loved it, revelled in it as much as you were, as much as you knew Neteyam did. You swam down until you reached one of the many leaves glowing brightly around you, and with a last look at Lo’ak, who was waiting for you on the surface, you held Kiri’s hand as you brought your queue forward.

“Remember. Think of him, as hard as you can. Think of where he could be.” Kiri signed to you before always reaching for her queue and, when you nodded, you both connected to the same leaf, almost overlapping each other. Air flooded your lungs, giving you breath as if from an oxygen pack, and as your eyes closed, you felt your soul transported through planes of existence, to the one you’ve been before, to the one Neteyam was. You knew where he’d be, there was no doubt in your mind that you’d find him in your clearing, in the forest, where you both said you’d spend the rest of eternity when eternity came and knocked on your door.

Sure enough, the sounds and smells and sights of the Omatikaya forest came sharply into focus, and your heart boomed in your chest taking it all in, taking home in. You knew where you were, not quite in the clearing yet, but close. Kiri’s hand tightened in yours as she joined you, and you saw her looking around, adjusting to the new environment.

“We’re… back home.”

You smiled and nodded. “This is where Neteyam and I decided our heaven would be when we were 8 years old. This is where we knew we’d always be, arrested in time, just him and I, together forever. We knew, even back then.” You pointed in the direction you needed to go. “It’s just beyond these trees.”

You let go of her hand and went in front of her, leading the way. As you stepped into the meadow, you were blinded by the rays of sun which blessed it and by your own tears at this place that meant so much, that you never thought you’d see again before your death.

You let out a loud gasp when your vision cleared and in it stood Neteyam, eyes closed as he was sprawled on the ground, a look of peaceful meditation on his face. You ran panting until you reached him, kneeling by his body and grabbing his face in both your hands, having to fight the urge to shake him wildly, shake him awake, shake him alive again. You tried to calm your breath and your heartbeat to no avail, no Metkayina trick in the book able to help you this time, not when you were right, not when he was here, not when you were one step closer to getting him back. You faintly heard Kiri crying softly, sounds muffled by your own mind blocking anything out that wasn’t him.

“Neteyam…?” You caressed his face gently, allowing your fingers to wonder all over it, feeling the sharp angle of his jaw, the soft swell of his lips, his eyelashes, the defined curve of his cheekbones. You touched his braids, those wild braids that mesmerised you, their liveliness and swing always putting you in a hypnotic trance, focusing your world on him and only him. You touched his ears, that twitched slightly under your touch and your eyebrows shot up in wonder and the movement, the only movement you’ve seen in him for days.

“Neteyam… please wake up. I’m here, we’re here. We’re here to take you home. Please.”

His eyes fluttered open and with it so did your chest and it felt like your ribcage was split apart in two and the animal that was trapped in it, thrashing and screaming, kicking at the bars, desperate for release, flew away, leaving you a sobbing mess on his chest, gripping onto him like it was the first time you have ever seen him, like he was your heart’s most sought after desire and any hesitation on your part would mean losing him forever. He was, he always has been - your most sought after desire, your reason for existing.

Your voice brought him out of another dream, memories of the past fluttering past his mind’s eye and settling on nights in the forest, swimming in the pond, running his fingers through your hair, kissing you until he ran out of breath, claiming your body until you were both so spent you didn’t know how you’d make it back home in the morning. He heard you sharing your deepest fantasies and secrets while you patiently redid his braids, spilling promises of love forever, of adoration and gratitude, for each moment you got to be in each other’s embrace, for every night you got to make up for the ones you lost; anecdotes about your time apart and how much you missed each other after all. Recalling times and feelings and musing at how despite how everything’s changed around you - you two haven’t, not to each other, not in any way that matters. You were still each other’s homes, just like you have been since the moment you were born.

His mind quieted when his eyes took you in, not the you he expected to see at all, but a blue you, beautifully striped, and kneeling next to him, face buried in his chest. He shifted his gaze somewhere behind you, and another shock rocked his system at the sight of his baby sister, crying silently, hand covering her mouth to stop the sounds threatening to spill out. His arms wrapped tightly around you and his hands caressed your hair gently and he couldn’t believe the relief that washed over him as you scent overwhelmed him, as your presence drowned everything else in this world but you. You found him. He realised then you were there to guide him home. No matter what path he would choose, stay here or go back, one of you would be there to lead the way, to show him the light - to be the light.

“Hi.”

Your eyes shot up to his face, wide and puffy, red and saturated in tears and his thumb settled over your quivering lips, stuck in this moment with you, trapped in the unmatched beauty of your gaze, by all the love and pain clearly on the surface, by everything else hidden in its depths.

“Hi! Hi, hi, hi! Oh my God, hi! I found you. I really found you.”

Your hands made their way around his neck and your face found its place on a part of his body that felt like it was carved for that purpose alone. This way, he was able to focus on the form staring at you two, sitting on the far side of the clearing, away from view. Neteyam heard his sister’s breath get knocked out of her lungs and when she found her voice, a small squeal came out.

“Um, ok…this is the weirdest thing I’ve ever seen, that’s for sure.”

“Ouch, Kiri. None taken.”

Neteyam felt you stiffen in his arms, as the voice speaking registered in your ears. You removed your body from him and looked at him with deep fear displayed clearly on your features. Your raised eyebrows dropped a little as he gave you a small smile, tightening his grip on your forearm.

“I think there’s someone you should meet.”

With shallow breaths and widened eyes, you turned around and wrapped your hand around your mate and squeezed as you assimilated the image unfolding in front of your eyes. It was… you. Your mind flashed to the day you first saw your Avatar body, and how weird it felt, seeing yourself like that, almost like an out-of-body experience. The memory shifted to seeing yourself as a weak, meek human after the consciousness transfer, the first time in your life seeing your human body from outside itself, thinking about how few humans, how few beings are able to ever experience this feeling, this insane, supernatural occurrence. Your mind finally settled on the present, at the girl you knew too well, the body you hated for so long, the body you missed as you had to let it go and were disappointed you couldn’t meet her warm smile with anything other than a grimace.

“How…?”

You got up and made your way carefully to her… to you… until you were face to face. She looked so different to what you always thought you looked like when you inhabited this body. She was… more beautiful than you ever thought. What made her… you… beautiful was the spark in your eye as they fixated on something you found interesting - in this particular case, your new blue body -, the way your nose crinkled a little while you smiled, the way two dimples formed in your cheeks that were rosy and full and…alive. Your curiosity got the better of you and almost involuntarily, you raised a hand and poked the human version of yourself staring at you with a finger.

“How are you here?”

She chuckled a little. “Let’s just say I’m your ghost of Christmas Past.”

The human you smiled at your confused guise. She playfully slapped your hand away and bend her head a little to look past you, at Neteyam.

“I can be a bit annoying sometimes, can’t I?”

“Hey!”

There was laughter all around you as both Neteyam and Kiri found human you a tad funnier at the moment than you would have liked.

“And I can be a pain in the ass sometimes, can’t I?”

Neteyam’s body immediately resolved any annoyance building up in you as he got close to you, and the way his proximity made you feel, the way you got to feel it - feel him - again, was almost too much to bear. You couldn’t believe he was here. Couldn’t believe he was awake, and alive, and touching you like he did, in the way he did that drove you crazy, that sent shivers down every inch of your being. You couldn’t believe you got to feel this way again, couldn’t believe you’d have a lifetime to make up for all the mistakes you made, to make up for the time you were forced apart yet again.

“You’re my pain in the ass.” You turned around to face him, eyebrow raised and he groaned lowly.

“I had a choice. And so do you.” A choice. A choice between seeing his siblings grow up and being there to love them and guide them or only glimpses of the future. A choice between growing old with you, getting to love you and evolve together, as you have all your life or clinging to the past. A choice between seeing his parents be grandparents, pass on their knowledge and experience or never seeing them again. A choice between claiming back his home, fighting for his people or cowering in a fantasy for the rest of time. A choice between seeing what his real kids, your real kids would look like, who they would grow up to be, and being there to witness every single day or glimpses of his past desires manifested like a storybook. A choice between life or death. Between the future or the past. As he looked into your amber eyes, soft and glimmering like the night sky, he knew there was only one answer.

He kissed you, with all his might, and felt light pour out of every corner of his being at the contact. You. The real you. The only you. He couldn’t believe how blind he’d been, blinded by his fears and insecurities, blinded by the incertitude of a unknown future, desperate to cling to a version of his world that was comfortable and familiar, a version of a life he’d dreamt when he was just a boy. He loved you so much, every part of you, every side of you, every body you inhabited because it didn’t matter if you were human or Na’vi, as long as he got to brave the world with you next to him.

“Let’s go home, Atan.”

Your cries filled the forest, happy tears sliding over his fingers as he held your face tightly in his hands. You couldn’t help the sobs that escaped you, couldn’t help the way you clung onto him like you would never ever let him go again. You didn’t think you would. You knew your fingers must hurt his arms with how hard you were digging into them, but you couldn’t care, not when the thought of letting go ripped apart your insides like an angry rabid animal.

“Neteyam… Neteyam…”

“Come on. I want to hold you in my arms for real, I want to see your face back home. Let’s go, Atan.”

He continued to caress your cheeks to remove the tears that wouldn’t stop, and when he realised you didn’t want to budge, he eventually pulled you into a hug that you both needed, that you needed more than life itself. You stood like that until your legs hurt, and when you fell slowly to the ground, he followed, not breaking the embrace - not for anything in this world or the next, not for any world. You sat on the ground, legs intertwined, flush against his chest until the forest started to slowly fade away from view.

“It’s time to go.” You heard Kiri’s calm, deep voice suppressed by the sound of your cries and shallow breaths.

You removed your head form his chest and pulled his face down to look at it.

“I’ll see you at home? In the marui? I’ll just come and you’ll be there?”

“I’ll be there. I promise. You will never get rid of me again. Deal?”

A half-sob, half-laugh made its way of your mouth, but you exhaled a sigh of relief as you spoke. “Deal, yawne.”

Neteyam felt anguished as he turned around to face your human astral projection, but as his fingers wrapped tightly around your own striped ones, he knew that the past is nothing compared to all he has to look forward to with you by his side. More and more of the world was slowly fading from view, and Neteyam knew it was time to say goodbye - forever, this time.

“What will happen to you now?”

“I’m not sure. Now I have guided you, I don’t know what my purpose is.”

“I will miss you so much.”

“I will miss you, too. So much, you will never be able to know. But I still have you, I can still see you, in glimpses of the world you live in. And you still have me.” You nodded in the direction of your Avatar body. “A little bluer, a little taller, but definitely an improved version of myself.”

“And one day, hopefully a really, really long time from now, you will see me again. Neteyam, I have always been your light, but you have always been my rock. You have always been what has grounded me, kept me going. And I know real life is not as beautiful, or whimsical, or perfect as this world right here. But it’s real. And in it, I will continue to be your light, and you will continue to be her…my rock. And whatever else comes, we’ll always brave it together. Just like we have all of our lives.”

Neteyam watched as you turned your attention to the other you, the real you.

“I know you are scared. You are so scared it hurts, it keeps you up at night. But don’t be so scared of the world you forget to live in it, you forget to revel in it. That you forget what really matters. There’s always going to be reasons to say no, always going to be reasons to push back, to postpone, and the truth is no moment will ever be perfect, but this world… it takes so much, it takes so fast, and when it does, what would you want to remember of it? What would you want to flash before your eyes before you go? I know what it is, because I am you. So just do it. Let yourself be vulnerable, once in your life. And see what comes of it.”

You both looked at each other, looked at yourselves, so different but yet the same, a mirror to the past and the present, of what you’ve been through and what you managed to accomplish, who you managed to become. You closed the gap and wrapped each other in a hug. A bear hug, a hug you both needed.

“Thank you. For keeping the past in here, for taking it so I can keep going. Thank you for everything, for guiding him home. For bringing him back to me.”

“I’m proud of you. Mum would be proud of you.”

You let go, tears swimming in your eyes, and with a small smile, Neteyam watched you turn around and make your way towards the light, your own light.

Your hand found Neteyam’s and your amber eyes found each other, and you couldn’t believe it still - that he was here, that he was still here, still yours. You had so much to say, so much to talk to him about, so much to apologise for, but you couldn’t, as your thoughts and words were interrupted by a scene unfolding in front of you. You followed two figures, ethereal and beautiful, emanating glow and light all around them, appear in front of human you, of past you. You inhaled loudly when the realisation hit, the stunned realisation that those were your parents. Your mum and dad, holding hands and smiling widely towards you.

“We’re here for you, my child. We can go home. We can finally be a family. I missed you so much, bunny.”

Tears were falling freely down your face, seeing a vision you have dreamt about your whole life, you have wished for in your deepest fantasies, in all your best, most out-of-reach dreams, and you felt at peace, for the first time in a long time, maybe the first time in your life, knowing that Heaven was real, and in it, so was your family.

Come, my darling, homeward bound

When all is lost, then all is found

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