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teshamerkel · 2 days

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Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Seekers of Soul

[Chapter 56]

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Nia and Tobias fly across the Obsidian Sea, and reunite with a couple of familiar faces!

The next day dawns cold and clear. As Nia and Tobias make the walk to the flying outpost, Nia is quickly woken up by the delicate frost coating the leaf-littered forest floor and the foliage they have to pass through. Her fur feels soaked through within minutes and her paws are chilled, but the brisk pace of the walk helps to warm her up. Well, that and walking a bit closer to Tobias. The charmander seems equally disgruntled about the approaching winter, but he doesn’t snap at Nia for bumping into him once or twice as she leeches off his bubble of warmth.

The sun is just starting to cut through the trees in rays of orange light, melting the frost, when Nia spots the tall structure of the flying outpost ahead of them. She picks up the pace, trotting ahead until it’s fully in sight in the middle of a small clearing. Something like canvas has been tied down to block the open gaps of the structure, acting as makeshift walls to cut off powerful gusts of wind. They billow and blow in the breeze like sails, flapping loudly.

There are only a few Pokemon waiting near the bottom of the structure, but Nia’s eyes lock onto one in particular, large and maroon with a fluffy mane of white.

“Fliss!”

The braviary’s head lifts from where she’d been talking to a smaller, bright orange Pokemon. Even with the intimidating scar where her right eye should be, the way Fliss’ face lights up is nothing short of adorable. “Nia! Well, I’ll be! You looking for a ride?”

“Yes!” Nia slows to a stop in front of the braviary, bouncing on her toes. Both because she’s excited to see the large flying type again and to stay warm. “Are you flying today?”

“Sure am! A little frost ain’t gonna stop me. Where’s that partner of yours? You two still a team?”

Nia turns, just in time for Tobias to emerge from the brush with a sour look. He takes a moment to shake melted frost from his foot. “Here. Just hating winter.”

Fliss laughs and jerks her chin up at the pieces of canvas. “You ain’t the only one. Half our crew’s hiding away until the sun comes out to warm everything up.”

“They’ll have to face the winter eventually,” a new voice says, crisp and even. The bird Fliss had been speaking with before steps closer, and Nia can’t help staring at his feathers a bit longer than is probably polite. He’s a bright orange, the color ending in flame-like tapers and fading into a light gray underbelly. His wings and tail are a striking black at their tips, and streaks of bright yellow band his tail feathers and ring his eyes and beak. He looks like the embodiment of fire, just a head or so taller than Nia and Tobias.

“This ball of sunshine is Comet,” Fliss says, amused. “If you’re lookin’ for a long flight, then he’ll be joining us for the trip.”

Tobias frowns, looking between Fliss and the new Pokemon. “Why?”

Fliss and Comet exchange a loaded look. Then, Fliss sighs. “Was hoping you wouldn’t ask, little flame. We’ve just been flyin’ in pairs lately. Extra safety and all that.”

Nia blinks. “Safety?”

“The winds are more volatile than they used to be,” Comet says. “I promise you we can handle it. It’s just a precaution.”

Nia can’t help wondering what had to happen for such a precaution to be put into place. She shuffles worriedly on her feet, glancing at Tobias. He doesn’t look any more soothed than she feels. No wonder, considering they’ll have to fly over the Obsidian Sea again. An accident over the open ocean is basically a death sentence for a charmander.

“We need to head back to Ghatha,” Nia says, locking eyes with Fliss. “So we would need to go over the ocean. Are you sure it’s safe?”

Nia knows this is technically Fliss’ livelihood, but she trusts the flying type not to lie to her just to make some extra money. Not about this.

The braviary ducks her head in a bow. “I’m as confident as a victini in my flight. But if ya aren’t comfortable, you could always find some water transport.”

“Though the ocean is becoming just as unstable,” Comet mutters.

Tobias shakes his head. “No. No, we’re on a tight schedule. I’ll be fine.”

Nia wonders if he’s reassuring her or himself.

“Neither Felicity or I have had any incidents,” Comet says. “Going together is just extra assurance. New protocol.”

Nia exchanges an uncertain look with Tobias. Normally she wouldn’t want to risk it, but they don’t really have any other option. They need to talk to Will as soon as possible, and using water transport would take far too long.

“We’ll fly,” Tobias says, deciding for the both of them. “If you’ll take us.”

“Gladly!”

The cost for travel is a bit higher than it was before—to compensate two ‘mons’ time rather than just one, Fliss explains—but luckily August gave them more funds than he’d thought they’d need. Tobias splits the payment between the two flying types, dropping the coins into the little pouch tied around Fliss’ leg and the small bag tied to Comet’s back.

Finally, it’s time to fly.

“Welcome aboard!”

Fliss crouches low, belly brushing the grass, to let them crawl on. Tobias doesn’t hesitate before taking a firm grip of the bird’s feathers and pulling himself up onto her back. He offers a hand, and Nia gives him a smile of thanks before letting him help her up. She sits behind him, wrapping her arms around his middle and grateful for his sturdy warmth.

“Smoother start than last time,” Fliss teases. “Ready to fly?”

Tobias nods. “Ready.”

Nia takes a deep breath. “As ready as I can be.”

Fliss laughs. “That’s what I like to hear! Just hold on tight now. Promise we’ll get ya to Ghatha safely.”

With that, Fliss pushes off the ground with powerful legs, giant wings beating hard to get into the air. She bobs once, then slowly lifts up and up and up. They rise past the outpost and the trunks of the trees, until they’re surging past leaves and into a sky that’s a robin’s egg blue.

Immediately, the wind buffets them, cold and biting.

Nia feels her stomach drop. She ducks her head into the warmth of Tobias’ shoulder, clinging tightly to him. She feels more than hears him sigh, but he doesn’t argue, just patting her arm twice once before holding once more to Fliss’ feathers.

Fliss rises higher and higher until she catches the air current she wants, then levels out to ride the wind. While the bone-deep fear clutching at Nia’s gut doesn’t disappear entirely, it does ease a bit once their jerky flight smooths out.

Nia almost wants to peek out at the world, recalling the brief glimpses of gorgeous, breathtaking views from last time. Plus, Tobias clearly loves this whole experience. It’d be fun to share it with him.

But as soon as she squints open an eye and catches sight of the sprawling forest below, looking as small as a carpet of moss, and the sheer openness of the sky around them, terror grabs her again.

She buries her head back into Tobias’ shoulder, taking deep breaths of his soothing scent to calm herself.

Nia still can’t remember if she’d flown before as a human. She knows planes are a thing, but her memory has only returned in bits and pieces. Much of her history is still blank, like a tapestry that’s more moth-eaten holes than actual thread. Was she afraid of heights in the human world too? Or is her body’s fighting type nature really enough to put such fear into her?

It’s hard to describe the feeling, especially as it engulfs her and makes her feel lightheaded. It’s like as much as she knows they’re (probably) safe with Fliss and Comet taking care of them, her body trembles with the knowledge that if she fell from here, she’d likely die. Her chest feels tight, her heart pounding hard against Tobias’ spine, and panic simmers quietly in the back of her mind.

“You breathing back there?” Tobias asks, head turning enough for Nia to catch the words.

Nia takes a gulp of air. Then another, slower, to try and follow his unspoken suggestion. Deep breaths. Just don’t think about it. You’re fine. Tobias is here, and Fliss is here, and if something goes wrong then Comet is here too.

“C-Can you talk?” Nia asks.

“Uh. I guess? About what?”

“Anything. I-I just need a distraction. Um. What kind of Pokemon is Comet?”

“Oh. He’s a talonflame. Fire and flying type, like a charizard. I don’t know too much about them, but he’s the final evolution in a three-stage form, and I can tell he’s fast. He keeps having to pull himself back so he doesn’t leave Fliss behind.”

Nia can’t bring herself to answer, breath stolen from her chest, so she nods.

Tobias keeps talking. “Uh. I think the first form is called a fletchling? They’re little things, about Junie’s size. Don’t remember the middle form’s name, though. Um…they’re probably pretty warm, if they’re anything like other fire types. That’s likely why he’s comfortable flying so early in the day, when it’s still cold.”

Comet must catch onto what Tobias is doing and what they’re discussing, because when Tobias starts running out of tidbits to share, Nia hears the talonflame’s voice shout to them over the wind.

“Talonflame are certainly a warmer species. We even create fire with our feathers, rather than a flame sac like most fire types. We produce an oil that’s flammable, and generate heat and friction through flapping our wings to ignite.”

“Watch,” Tobias says, tapping Nia’s arm.

Nia whines, but peeks open an eye in the direction of Comet’s voice.

Comet is sailing easily along on an air current, framed by blue sky. Upon seeing that he has her attention, he flaps his wings—once, twice, three times—and small embers spark to life from his feathers, leaping behind him to be carried away by the wind.

Nia’s curiosity just barely wins out over her fear. She lifts her head to watch more clearly as Comet does it again. He flaps once, hard, and flames burst to life around his wings, hot enough that Nia feels a brief wave of warmth. Then he shoots forward, zipping past Fliss.

“Show-off!” Fliss shouts, laughter in her voice.

“She was curious,” Comet counters, voice now on their other side.

Nia turns to look at him, mouth open to ask questions about how they can choose when to ignite, and if fletchlings can do that too, and a hundred other things—

But she catches sight of the Silenfroar Mountains behind the talonflame, remembers where she is, and icy fear grips her again. She buries her face with a whimper, feeling pathetic.

Tobias sighs.

“Want me to take a turn on distraction duty?” Fliss calls.

Someone must give her the affirmative, because she starts talking. “Did ya know that there’s another variant of braviary out there? Psychic and flying type! I met one once, and he could blast enough psychic energy to knock out a wailord. I can pack a punch myself, so I was mostly just jealous that he could use his powers to write! This old gal is forever cursed with illiteracy.”

“You can read,” Comet says, dry.

“Half-illiteracy, then!”

“That’s not how it works.”

Nia giggles despite herself, grateful for her travel companions as they fall into more animated conversation. Like this, if Nia keeps her eyes closed and takes deep breaths, if she lets the breeze soothe her and imagines she’s just on a windy hillside rather than hundreds of feet in the air, it’s not too terrible. Although Nia wishes she could whip out her blanket without risk of it blowing away. It’s much colder than the last time they flew.

The three Pokemon keep the conversation flowing, shifting from one topic to another, until Fliss finally asks why they’re returning to Ghatha so soon.

“We’re actually going to Stonebrook, a bit south of Ghatha,” Tobias says. “We’re meeting someone there.”

“Oh, Stonebrook!” Fliss crows. “Nice little place. Quaint. We could drop ya off there if you’d prefer, for a bit of extra poke to compensate our time.”

Tobias makes a thoughtful sound that rumbles in his chest. “How much extra?”

“Let’s say 150.”

Tobias mulls it over, and Nia can feel him turn his head as if to get her input.

“Whatever you think is best,” Nia says into his shoulder.

Tobias hesitates for a moment longer before turning forward again. “100 poke and you’ve got a deal.”

Fliss laughs, loud and booming even as the wind snatches the sound away. “Haggler, eh? You know what? Sure. I like you two, so 100 poke it is. Comet, you can have the larger share since I took the lower deal.”

Comet doesn’t answer, so Nia assumes he agrees with those conditions.

Time passes in a blur after that. Nia knows that they have at least a few hours until they reach the land across the sea, but she tries to distract herself by listening to the snippets of conversation around her and thinking about what they have waiting ahead of them. They’re going to find Junie! And see Will again, as well as his human settlement. Excitement mixes in with the nerves in her stomach.

However, it's hard not to let her mind drift to more panic-inducing thoughts too, like their current situation in the air, or their mission from Giratina, or even how much she misses her family in the human world when she has the time to think about them.

Nia wants them here. She wants her mom to stroke her hair and soothe her fear. She wants Clay to make stupid jokes to distract her. She wants Toni to stick her obnoxiously large headphones over Nia’s ears to drown out the quiet roar of the wind.

She misses them so much. Longing aches like a bruise inside her chest.

Nia sniffs and hopes that Tobias doesn’t notice her shaky breaths. Tears prick at her eyes, hot and insistent.

Nia misses them, and she doesn’t even have the full story. She’d hoped that after getting sick and remembering some of her life as a human, the rest of her memories would follow. But after the initial deluge, they’d slowed to a stop. She knows she’s still missing a lot, still has giant gaps in her memory that feel impossible to focus on for too long. What was the last thing she even did with her family before showing up here?

Nia is pulled out of her thoughts when Tobias speaks up, tapping her arm. “We’re at the ocean.”

Nia doesn’t think he means for her to look up, just to update her, so she nods her thanks into his shoulder.

After that, Nia tries to let the loud howl of the wind and the roar of the waves drown out her thoughts and anxieties. Tries to let the sensations surround her in a fuzzy haze.

She’s snapped back to reality by the sudden tilt of the world.

Nia squeaks, clinging to Tobias as Fliss’ considerable mass is knocked sideways by a sudden gust of wind. The braviary flaps wildly to correct herself, and Nia’s stomach flips. Oh, they’re gonna die they’re gonna die they’re gonna die—

Fliss finally manages to catch a gentler air current, leveling out her erratic flight. Nia keeps her face hidden away, focusing on her death grip around Tobias’ ribs and the way he’s clutching at her arm in return.

“Are you two all right?” Comet yells, sounding more tense than Nia would like. His voice is closer too, as if hovering near enough to catch them if they fall.

Tobias squeezes Nia’s wrist, whether to reassure her or himself that she’s still hanging on. “I don’t know if I’d say all right, exactly, but we’re still here. What was that?”

“Rogue wind,” Fliss calls back. “I’ve sailed these currents for more than twenty years, and I’ve never seen anything like ‘em. They like to pop up out of nowhere and throw us off course.”

“A symptom of the increasing natural disasters, as far as we can tell,” Comet adds. “It certainly makes travel more difficult. Dangerous, particularly for the smaller flyers.”

Nia’s heart sinks. This is just one more reminder of what they’re trying to stop. Of what will come to pass if they don’t fix the world. Nia can imagine the winds growing untamed enough eventually to ground flyers completely, whipping up storms and typhoons to wreak havoc alongside earthquakes and droughts.

Nia takes another deep breath to ward off fresh panic. This is why they’re going to see Will. They’re going to fix this. All of it.

“Don’t you worry—I’m much tougher than any rowdy wind!” Fliss calls, trying to sound upbeat. “You two just hold on tight and we’ll be sure to get you to Stonebrook safely.”

Tobias nods, but doesn’t respond. Nia, still trying to calm her racing heart, simply holds onto him tighter. She already didn’t like flying, but the thought that the world could suddenly flip and toss them into the ocean at any time is ten times worse. Not that she doesn’t trust Fliss, but she distrusts the current state of nature even more.

“I’ll scout ahead to make sure that doesn’t happen again,” Comet calls, just loud enough to hear, before Nia feels another burst of warmth from his flames. He must’ve jetted forward to fly just ahead of Fliss.

Unfortunately, conversation stops after that as Fliss and Comet focus on navigating the rough air currents. Time passes in tense quiet, aside from the rush of the wind and the roar of the waves. Every time a gust of wind shakes up their flight even the slightest bit, Nia’s heart jumps into her throat.

When Tobias finally speaks again, it’s quiet and almost to himself. “Huh.”

Nia tightens her grip on her partner. “W-What? Is something wrong?”

“No. I don’t think so, at least.” Tobias leans slightly, as if peering over Fliss’ side. “Giratina’s following us.”

That’s interesting enough to make Nia look up. She debates with herself for just a moment before steeling her courage, tightening her grip, and following Tobias’ gaze down, to the choppy ocean below.

Sure enough, Nia spots Giratina’s giant, serpentine shape in the broken reflections on the ocean’s surface. He’s following alongside Fliss’ quick pace, winding like a snake through black water.

Fliss notices the legendary’s presence, but she must think it’s another Pokemon because she just gripes about nosy water types before flapping higher to catch a different current. Nia stiffens at the reminder of how high up they are and burrows back into her safe space.

“Surely he has better things to do than follow us around,” Tobias says.

“Maybe we should give him an update?” Nia suggests. “To be fair, he doesn’t know what we’re doing. We could try talking to him through a reflection later?”

“Maybe.”

And with that, they fall silent again.

____________________________________________________________

It’s late morning when they finally make it back to land, and almost noon by time Fliss calls out that they’ll be landing in Stonebrook in a few minutes.

The rest of their flight had been uneventful after that first incident. Comet had successfully steered them around any other severe turbulence, and the cold weather had warmed with the sun beating down on their backs. Still, Nia is beyond relieved to have the end of their flight so near, and she manages to lift her head and take a peek at where they’re going.

The forest below looks different from the one in Bethoc’s Haven. The trees back home are a range of species, mostly deciduous, with spreading boughs and wide leaves that change colors and wither away with the seasons. These trees, even from a distance, stand tall and pointed, a rich palette of greens despite the approaching winter. Evergreens?

Fliss and Comet aim for a notable gap in the trees. As they start to descend, Nia realizes they aren’t just settling in a small grove or clearing, but instead at the edge of a tiny village nestled amongst the trees. There are small buildings scattered throughout the space, built from boulders and slabs of stone propped against one another. Other than a few purposeful openings that are clearly windows, any gaps are filled in with smaller, carefully stacked stones. A stream winds through the town, stepping stones bridging its two halves, and even this late in autumn the whole place feels green and lush, each building topped by a grassy roof. They must be farther south than Nia had realized.

Pokemon are scattered around the village, going about their day. Children are chasing each other down dirt paths, shrieking with laughter, while a couple of adults talk and watch the kids from outside stone homes. Others appear to be doing chores or running errands. One building is seemingly the home of a merchant, and a few Pokemon are crowded around the little window where he’s exchanging goods. Smoke rises from another building, and Nia catches the savory scent of something cooking. Some Pokemon are even riding a cart out of town on the main path, heading who knows where.

Fliss finally touches down, and Nia wastes no time in sliding off her back. The cool, pine needle-strewn dirt below her feet is blessedly solid.

“Oh, thank God,” Nia breathes, sinking to the ground. Her legs are somehow both stiff and flimsy as jelly.

Fliss laughs, lowering herself so Tobias can slide down much more gracefully.

“You good?” He asks.

Nia groans, leaning forward to press her forehead against the dirt. Tobias gives her a patronizing pat on the back.

“Apologies again for the rough flight over,” Comet says, stepping closer.

“But we did get you here in one piece!” Fliss says, giving an exaggerated wink with her one good eye.

Tobias helps Nia to her feet. “That you did. Thanks.”

“We’re planning to head to Ghatha right away for our next job, so you may need to make the journey north on foot if you need a return flight,” Comet says.

“That’s fine!” Nia says, giving Comet a weak smile as she starts stretching out her stiff legs. “We probably won’t need a flight ‘mon for a while, anyways. We need to find someone here in town, and then we’re heading south.”

“Fair enough,” Fliss says. “Well, it was good seeing you two again, despite the rocky weather. Be careful on your travels and be sure to find us again if you need a flight! It’s always a pleasure having you as riders.”

“Thanks, Fliss,” Nia says, smiling warmly at the braviary. “I can’t say it’s been, um…fun, exactly, but I appreciate you doing your best to make it easier for me. Both of you.”

Comet dips his head. “Of course. It was nice meeting you both.”

With that, Fliss and Comet step back and take flight again, flapping up and into the sky. Nia waves them off until they’re out of sight.

Then it’s just Nia and Tobias standing at the edge of the village. Stonebrook is absolutely tiny, maybe ten or twelve small buildings in all, and Nia can see clear to the other side of town from where they’re standing. While the inhabitants of the village aren’t approaching them, there are one or two Pokemon watching them curiously, clearly wondering who they are and why they flew to Stonebrook of all places.

“Well, we’re here. Now what?” Tobias asks.

“Well…” Nia trails off, looking around. “I guess we just ask around until someone can point out where Junie lives? It can’t be too hard to find her in a town this small.”

Tobias shrugs, clearly not thrilled about socializing with a bunch of strangers, but follows as Nia wanders into the village proper, towards the merchant shop she’d spotted earlier.

“This place is nice,” Nia says, smiling as one of the children she’d seen before runs past her. The kid, a brown chipmunk Pokemon with a leafy green bonnet, does a double-take at the two strangers in his village, and skids to a stop. The Pokemon that had been chasing the little guy slams into him, and the two fall into a squirming, squabbling heap.

“It’s definitely not where I expected Junie of all Pokemon to settle down,” Tobias says, stepping around the kids. “It’s too…”

“Peaceful?”

“I was going to say boring, but yeah.”

Nia elbows him to be polite, still looking around as they approach the merchant’s shop. The village is open to the sun, but it’s surrounded by a thick wall of pine trees. Nia can’t decide if the forest feels reassuring or confining. Then again, she lives inside a giant tree, so she doesn’t really have room to talk.

“Nia?”

Nia stops in place, ears perking at the familiar voice. She spins to find it, beaming when she sees Junie stopped mid-step mere feet away. The rookidee is clearly shocked, beak open and wide ruby eyes flicking between Nia and Tobias in disbelief.

“Junie!” Nia says.

Junie blinks once. Twice. Then she finally seems to register that this is really happening. She tweets an excited, shrill noise before rocketing into Nia’s open arms. Nia falls to the dirt and moss, laughing.

“What’re you doing here?!” Junie says, nuzzling into Nia’s fur. “Where did you even come from?”

“We flew!” Nia laughs, hugging her. “Did you not see us? Half the village has been staring at us since we landed.”

“I just got into town!” Junie leans back just enough to meet Nia’s eyes, feathers fluffed with excitement. “What’re you doing here?!”

Nia feels her smile falter a bit. She sits up, and Junie resettles in her lap. “We have business south of here, so we thought we would stop by and visit you on the way.”

“I’m so glad you did! I missed your adorable face.” Junie’s gaze flicks behind Nia to where Tobias is standing, and she perks up all over again. “And Toby’s here too!”

“I told you not to call me that,” Tobias growls.

“Good to see you haven’t lost your charming personality!”

Nia giggles, while Tobias just rolls his eyes.

“Ahem.”

Nia and Junie look up to see a pink cow Pokemon standing over them, a basket full of linens held against her hip.

Oh. They decided to have their reunion right in the middle of town, didn’t they? And right in the middle of one of the walking paths, too.

Junie laughs and flaps her way out of Nia’s lap. “Sorry, Marie!”

Nia scrambles to follow. “Sorry, ma’am!”

Marie shakes her head, but she’s smiling as she passes. “Good to see you so happy, Junie. Just keep the paths clear, all right?”

Junie salutes the Pokemon’s back, sending Nia a wry smile.

Huh. Nia had gotten the impression back in Ghatha that Junie didn’t talk to her neighbors much, but that was a pretty casual exchange with Marie. Maybe she’s grown more comfortable with them since then?

Once the cow Pokemon is out of earshot, stopping outside of her home to hang the linens on a makeshift clothesline, Junie turns to Nia. “Come on, we can go back to my place.”

“Oh, sure!”

Nia and Tobias follow as Junie hops down one of the village’s dirt paths, then leaves the trail entirely to head into the woods.

Nia hesitates at the tree line, watching Junie’s dark feathers get nearly swallowed up by the forest’s heavy shade. The three of them are dwarfed by the tall evergreens here.

“You don’t live in town?” Nia asks.

“Nope! I live with Bo now! He should actually be stopping by the house soon with some lunch.”

Nia’s brows rise at the bird’s easy answer, but she dutifully follows before she can lose sight of the rookidee.

Junie had seemed so stubbornly independent back in Ghatha. When did that change? Nia did tell her she should try connecting more with her neighbors, but this feels like a big step.

“Bo?” Tobias asks when they catch up.

“Yeah! He’s a dork, but he’s the best. A real metal guy.”

Nia tilts her head, hearing the joke in Junie’s voice but unsure of what to make of it. A pun, no doubt.

“Is he your, um…”

Junie must pick up on what Nia is asking, because she scrunches up her face and sticks out her tongue. “Ew, no, gross. He’s like. A dad. Or an older brother, maybe. Oh! No, wait, he’s definitely an uncle!”

“How do you just decide that someone’s an uncle?” Tobias asks.

“When they have uncle energy, duh. Keep up, Toby.”

Tobias sends Nia a look that makes it clear he’s already done with Junie for this visit. Nia bites back a laugh.

The rookidee leads them farther into the forest than Nia expects, until Stonebrook is out of sight behind them and they’re surrounded by the quiet of the trees. It’s heavily shaded here with the canopy of evergreens so thick, and the air cools notably. At first, Nia almost finds it unnerving, used to the dappled sunshine of the forest in Bethoc’s Haven, but the peaceful quiet and gentle, dark colors grow on her quickly. The ground underfoot is a soft mix of dirt, moss, and soft pine needles, and the air is fragrant with the scent. The trunks of the pines tower above them. There’s less foliage to wade through, which is nice. It’s not bad, necessarily. Just…different.

Finally, Nia sees something up ahead, an out of place gray amongst the cool browns and greens of the forest.

“This is where we live!” Junie chirps, hopping ahead to present it with a wide flourish of her wings.

It’s a small abode made of stone, much like the homes back in Stonebrook proper. One of its walls seems to be made up of the large tree it’s propped against, and its roof is a grassy slant of soil atop a slab of stone. The other walls are made of smaller, carefully stacked rocks, with only two rectangular gaps left on either side of the wooden door—windows, most likely, seeing as they’re currently covered by leafy blinds. There are a few flowers and paint doodles decorating the outside, almost certainly Junie’s doing, that brighten the gray exterior. The little house is cushioned by moss and framed by more giant pine trees, but there are a few slices of sunshine in this part of the forest, making the whole place look homey rather than unwelcoming.

“It’s lovely!” Nia says, charmed.

“You sleep on the ground?” Tobias asks, sounding more confused than anything.

“Hey, what’s wrong with that?” Junie asks, giving him a glare. “You sleep on the ground!”

“We literally live in a tree.”

Junie stops mid-retort, blinking. “Huh. Guess you do. Still! Lots of Pokemon sleep on ground level!”

“Not flying types.”

“We’ve had some rough storms around here, okay?” Junie huffs. “Besides, I used to sleep in trees before moving in with Bo, and it’s not all it’s cracked up to be. I kept falling out, and it got so drafty! This is much cozier.”

“Or maybe you’re just a weirdo.”

“Maybe it’s just your human side talking,” Nia suggests, biting back a laugh at the cross look Junie sends her partner. “Humans do like being cozy.”

“Because it’s the best!” Junie says with a decisive nod. She opens her mouth to say something else, then pauses, glancing up through the trees as they rustle with the wind. “Oh! I think Bo’s home!”

Nia peers up through the pine branches and the slivers of sunlight, but she can’t see much of anything through the thick boughs.

“I’d step back if I were you,” Junie says, hopping back against the house. “I’ve been knocked over by his tailwind more times than I can count.”

Finally, Nia sees him: a silver bird diving through a gap in the evergreens. He flashes bright when he cuts through a ray of sunlight, like the sun reflecting off a car, and the undersides of his wings are a scarlet red. As he descends, Nia realizes just how big he really is, and scrambles back to make room, Tobias right on her heels.

The bird slows down with a few powerful flaps right before he meets the forest floor. The gust created from his wings makes Nia brace herself against the house and squint her eyes shut as he settles heavily onto the mossy ground.

Nia blinks grit from her eyes and trails her gaze up from huge talons and a bulky silver body until she finds the bird’s face. He’s gotta be over two times their height, and he’s seemingly covered in…metal? The wings he tucks against his sides almost seem to be tipped in blades, sharp as they are, but they don’t cut through the satchel strapped around his body. His head is an equally sharp thing, with a wicked beak of sharp teeth and a spike of metal atop his head, almost like a helmet. He meets Nia’s gaze with keen yellow eyes.

“You didn’t tell me we were having visitors, Junebug,” the bird says, voice more playful than Nia expects. “I would’ve cleaned the place up a bit. Now I just look like a bad host.”

Junie laughs, hopping forward to gesture with her wings. “I’m just as surprised as you are! These are the friends I told you about, from Ghatha! Nia and Toby.”

“Tobias, actually,” Tobias corrects. It’s halfhearted, though, as he sizes up the Pokemon in front of them.

Nia gives the large bird a smile and a shy wave.

The bird squawks a laugh. “You two are just like Junie described! Nice to meet you. I’m Bolat. Local mail ‘mon and self-appointed wrangler for this little impidimp.”

Bolat reaches out a taloned foot to nudge Junie, surprisingly gentle. The rookidee trills an annoyed sound as she’s still nearly knocked over, but she’s smiling.

“I keep your life exciting and you know it!”

“Can’t argue with that.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” Nia says, bowing lightly. Tobias doesn’t say anything, but Nia sees him give the bird a respectful nod.

“You too.” Bolat tilts his head, looking at them consideringly. “Do you two plan to bunk with us tonight?”

“Oh! I-I mean, we can find somewhere else to sleep if it’s any trouble, but—”

Bolat laughs and shakes his head. “No no, you’re fine. We have room. We’ll just need to get you some bedding for a proper nest. Guessing you haven’t done that yet?”

“They just got here!” Junie says. “Gimme like an hour. There’s some decent stuff in that glen west of here, right?”

Bolat hums, eyeing the two of them again before turning back to Junie. “How about I just grab some bedding for the night while I’m out on my second run? I’m sure you want to catch up anyways.”

Nia almost protests out of pure politeness, but glances at Junie instead. This is her home, after all. Even if Nia is surprised that the little bird isn’t immediately insisting she can do it herself.

After a moment of thought, though, Junie just nods. “If you don’t mind, that’d be awesome! Thanks, Bo.”

“Eh, no big. It’s a slow day anyways. Ah, here.” Bolat lifts a wing to dip his beak into the satchel looped over his body, rummaging around through…letters? He finally re-emerges with a small sack, which he drops in front of Junie. “Grabbed some lunch. Make sure you eat a few of the chestnuts and greens—you need more bulk if you want to carry more than a letter at a time.”

Junie groans and butts her head against Bolat’s leg with a thonk. “I know, I know! I’ll eat my stupid veggies. Thanks.”

Bolat laughs again and looks at Nia and Tobias. “There should be enough in there for all three of you, if you haven’t had lunch yet. I’ll pick something else up for myself.”

“Are you sure?” Nia asks, ears lowering. She can’t help feeling like they’re imposing, showing up so suddenly and making Bolat do so much for them.

“Of course!” Bolat waves them off with a giant wing. “Any friend of June’s is a friend of mine. Make yourselves at home.”

“Well…thank you, then.”

“’Course.” Bolat squints up through the trees at the midday sunshine. “I’d better get going if I don’t want to be late, though. Can you hold down the fort until I get back, Junebug?”

“Aye aye, cap’n!” Junie says, saluting with her little wing.

“In that case, I’ll see you all this evening with bedding in tow. See you!”

Bolat barely waits for Nia and Tobias to say their own goodbyes before he’s flapping hard at the ground again and lifting up into the air. Nia watches, kind of awestruck that a bird seemingly made of metal can appear so light and graceful as he flies up between the trees and out of sight.

Then Nia squints, looking down at Junie. “’A real metal guy?’”

Junie chirps a laugh. “I wasn’t lying, was I?”

Tobias snorts. “A skarmory’s about as metal as a flying type can get.”

“Exactly! Now, come on in. I can’t make you guys proper nests until Bo brings back some fluff, but we can still catch up and eat!”

Junie grabs the lip of the sack of food and drags it along behind her, flapping furiously against its weight. Nia holds open the front door so Junie can get inside, watching as the little bird pulls open the blinds on the two small windows to let in some fresh air and sunlight. Then Nia follows her, surprised by how the inside of the little home feels both cozy and more spacious than she expects.

It’s clearly a space built for just one or two Pokemon, but it’s organized. There’s a small basin off to one side of the room, with bowls, cloths, and other supplies resting near it on a small, flat boulder. On the other side, there’s a larger slab of stone, where two nests sit. One is clearly Junie’s, a tiny bowl of moss and pine needles perfectly sized to cup her body. The second nest is much, much larger, and Nia has to stare at it for a moment to try to understand what she’s looking at.

Are those…thorns?

Junie notices Nia’s expression and twitters a laugh. “Yeah, Bo sleeps in a nest of brambles. Apparently lots of skarmory do it to protect their chicks and toughen up their feathers or something? Or he’s just a freak, I dunno.”

“That’s, um…really intense,” Nia settles on.

“Right?! I’ll stick with my soft, squishy nest, thank you very much. I’m a delicate lady, after all.”

Over near the table, Tobias snorts.

“Oh, what?” Junie says, playfully challenging. “Something you want to say, Toby?”

“Lots of things. But then Nia would scold me for being rude.”

“Like that ever stopped you before.”

Nia smiles as the two go back and forth. She trails closer to the nests, which are sitting right next to one another, almost touching.

“You two seem close,” Nia says, glancing back at Junie.

“I mean…I guess? I haven’t really been here that long.”

“Yeah, but you seemed really against letting anyone help you back in Ghatha. So I guess I’m just glad you found someone here you trust.”

“Yeah…” Junie starts preening her wing, visibly embarrassed. “I was being kind of dumb about that, in hindsight. Like. Bo can be ridiculous, but he’s super nice, y’know? I really like living here. He’s been teaching me a lot, too! Like getting me to fly higher without freaking out.”

Nia turns to look at Junie. “Really?”

“Yup! I can even fly above the trees now! Not by much before I panic again, but I’m definitely better than before. Bo thinks he can get me over my fear of heights in under a year!”

“See if he can teach Nia, too,” Tobias jokes, picking up a bowl to inspect it.

“This…seems like a big deal to you,” Nia says slowly, a little confused. “I-I mean, don’t get me wrong! It’s great! But your fear of heights didn’t seem to bother you that much before?”

“Well…” Junie hops over to fiddle with the tie on the sack of food, clearly looking for something to keep herself busy. “I couldn’t help you in the fire at Ghatha because I was too scared of flying, and I only ended up living with Bo because I was too weak to navigate a storm. So I guess I just want to get better at being a flying type so I can actually do things and not be scared all the time. Plus, I’ll need to be able to fly for real if I want to have a more exciting job than just running errands around Stonebrook.”

“A job?” Tobias asks, frowning. “Like as a Seeker?”

Junie bursts into laughter. “Absolutely not! Fighting’s the worst. Don’t know how you do it, Nia. And dealing with clients and guildmasters? Ugh. No thanks.”

“What’re you hoping to do instead?” Nia asks.

“I’m thinking a mail ‘mon like Bo!” Junie says. She abandons the sack and hops up onto the windowsill to better meet Nia’s gaze. She looks excited, chest puffed and eyes bright. “It’ll take me a few years to learn the landscape well enough to find my way around, and I have to build up enough strength to actually carry a few letters long distance—especially since I have to stay a pipsqueak forever—but I think I’d really like it! Bo’s let me tag along on a few of his runs and it’s the best. He gets to go everywhere and he meets so many funny people!”

Nia blinks at Junie’s enthusiasm, surprised. That’s…quite the long-term goal. Without thinking, she says, “Years? But what about getting back home?”

Junie seems confused for a moment, but then she pouts. “Oh. Right. You still want to be human again, don’t you?”

Nia jerks back. She remembers Junie mentioning something like this in Ghatha, but— “You don’t? You want to stay here? Like this? Forever?”

Junie’s pout deepens into something more genuinely troubled. Her eyes flick to Tobias before resettling on Nia. “Yeah? Just because you want to go back to the boring old human world doesn’t mean everyone does.”

“But…” Nia trails off, at a loss for words. She looks at Tobias, wondering if he’s as surprised as she is. He’s pointedly fiddling with the bowl in his hands, not meeting Nia’s eyes. Oh. Right. Leaving would mean…leaving him behind. And everyone else, too.

But even with that in mind, Nia still can’t help her shock. When she thinks of the human world, she doesn’t think of how boring it can be. She thinks of her family, of going home and reuniting with them. She thinks of her brother pulling her into a crushing hug and lifting her off the ground. She thinks of her mom crying and cooking a big meal for the family to eat together. She thinks of Toni refusing to leave her side for a week straight and catching her up on everything she missed.

Does Junie not have people like that to go home to?

“Do you not remember anything yet?” Nia asks. “About your old life?”

Junie hops down to the soft dirt of the floor and back over to the sack of food. “No, I remember. Not a lot, but enough. It just isn’t good enough to convince me to go back.”

“Wait, doesn’t Will have some theory about humans having to get close to death to regain their memories?” Tobias asks, narrowing his eyes at Junie. “Did you get your memories back after the fire in Ghatha?”

“Nope! Not there. I got pretty hurt right after I got back to Stonebrook, so it must’ve been then. I didn’t know about the whole near-death thing, but it did happen while I was recovering, so.”

“You got hurt?!” Nia asks, alarmed despite knowing that Junie has been totally fine the entire time they’ve been talking. She still can’t resist stepping closer and crouching to scan the delicate little bird’s body. “It had to be serious if you remembered something.”

Junie chirps a laugh. “Sure was! A nasty storm hit the woods and a branch fell on me. Almost flattened me like a pancake! Funny how that’s almost happened twice now, huh? Anyways, that’s how I met Bo! He helped me get back on my feet. Oh! And look at this!”

Junie ignores the distress surely painting Nia’s face to hop back a step. Then, with a furrow in her little brow and a few moments of quiet, a bubble of bright orange energy flickers to life around her.

Aura. Junie’s aura. Nia can sense it immediately, even if she hadn’t been able to see it herself. Her jaw drops.

The bubble around the rookidee only lasts for a second or two, weak and faint, before vanishing again. Junie pants, clearly exhausted from the little display, but beams at Nia and Tobias’ gobsmacked expressions.

“I used protect when the branch landed on me! Though apparently not very well, since I still fractured some bones. Definitely not as strong as the one you used in Ghatha, Nia. But still! Isn’t that cool?!”

“You can use aura now?” Tobias asks, looking horrified. He’s probably thinking about Junie possessing all of the intimate soul-reading powers that Nia has.

Junie shakes her head. “Nah. Just this one move. But I still thought it was neat!”

“It is neat,” Nia offers a beat too late, feeling off-kilter. That one book in the archives did mention that all humans could use protect, but it’s still strange seeing it in action.

Junie puffs out her little chest, proud, before realizing something. She glares at Nia. “Wait, you also got some of your memories back? That means you almost died again, too! I thought I told you guys not to get into any more trouble!”

Nia winces, holding out her hands in a placating gesture. “T-To be fair, I just got really sick?”

“That’s an understatement,” Tobias grumbles, walking over to flick Nia with his tail.

“Oh.” Junie’s irritation deflates. “That sucks.”

“A little,” Nia laughs. “Although…Junie, do me a favor and promise to go to a doctor right away if you get sick, okay? It can get pretty serious for humans.”

Junie opens her mouth to make a lighthearted quip, but something about the expressions on their faces stops her. She tilts her head, clearly curious, but eventually chirps, “Yeah, okay. I promise.”

After that, they settle on the ground outside to eat, where the dirt and moss has been warmed a bit by the sun. Tobias opens the sack Bolat brought back, where a small feast of berries, veggies, and some spiky chestnuts await them for lunch.

Junie gets to work carefully cracking open the chestnuts with her beak while Nia and Tobias divvy up the rest of the food for their impromptu picnic. It’s still chilly out, especially in the shade of the forest, but it’s not as cold as it was while flying over. The wind smells like fresh pine as it rattles through the trees, and dappled sunlight plays across the ground.

“I still feel bad eating the food Bolat got specifically for you two,” Nia says as Junie passes them some of the unshelled chestnuts to add to their meal.

“Don’t be. Bo’s really generous, and he finds lots of food while he’s out on the job. He took me in when I got hurt and took care of me without a second thought.”

Nia smiles as she takes a bite of a carrot-like vegetable, crunching away at it. Bolat does seem awfully nice, and Nia’s beyond grateful that Junie found someone like him to take care of her when she was so injured. She doesn’t want to imagine what would’ve happened otherwise.

“So, catch me up,” Junie says around a mouthful of food. “Any leads on the whole ‘returning to the human world’ front?”

Nia feels Tobias’ eyes on her, and tries not to look too eager at the prospect. “Um…a few? I have some ideas, but nothing solid yet.”

Junie hums, clearly sympathetic but not at all upset on her own behalf. “That sucks. Sorry, Nia. Let me know if I can help, okay? Although I don’t know what I could add that you and Will don’t already have covered.”

Nia slowly puts her own food back down. “Junie, you…you really don’t want to go back home, do you?”

Junie shrugs, looking uncomfortable. “I mean. I miss some stuff, I guess, but most of my memories are just…blah, you know? And I’m happy here! Even though I’m gonna be a little shrimp forever, I’m much happier here than I ever was as a human.”

Nia sits back, torn. On one hand, it’s not like she can argue with Junie’s feelings. And just because Nia wants to see her family and friends so desperately doesn’t mean everyone does. But to just abandon her old life entirely? Just like that?

“You aren’t worried that somebody will miss you?” Nia can’t help asking.

“Not really. They aren’t my problem anymore.”

What in the world does that mean?

Nia tries not to visibly slump, and starts picking at her food again. She’d been so excited to share her recovered memories with the rookidee, but now she isn’t so sure she wants to. Would Junie even want her to, or would it just be awkward?

“So is that the mission you’re doing south of here? Figuring out human stuff?”

“Um, no. Not really. We are going to see Will, but not about that.”

“What for, then?”

Nia glances at Tobias. He’s munching on a chestnut, and gives Nia a wave of his hand that clearly says it’s Nia’s prerogative how much she wants to share.

“Okay, your little telepathic communication thing is adorable, but what’s with the serious face?” Junie asks. She looks between Nia and Tobias. “You’re not telling me something.”

For a moment, Nia considers brushing off Junie’s concerns. She hadn’t told Xander’s team or Andyn’s team about the whole “world ending” thing, but…well, quite frankly, she doesn’t think Junie will let it go now that she’s picked up on it.

Plus, she’s human like Nia, as much as she apparently doesn’t want to be anymore. She didn’t have a life here before all of this started happening. It feels right, to let her in on the secret too.

Nia puts her food down again. “You’re right. Sorry. We, um…we found something out recently. Something big.”

Junie frowns. “Bad big?”

“Certainly not good big,” Tobias huffs.

“We met Giratina,” Nia says. “He—"

“Wait, back up. Giratina? The scary nightmare creature that Will explicitly told us not to talk to?”

Nia winces. “Yes? He’s, um…actually pretty civil. If a bit of a grouch.”

“So like Tobias, then,” Junie says. She doesn’t even bask in his reaction, adding, “Okay, hold up, start from the beginning. I need the whole story.”

Nia hesitates, but crumbles quickly under Junie’s insistent gaze.

So Nia tells the story yet again, from the moment when Tobias noticed Giratina following them, all the way up to their talk with August when they returned to the guild. She’s getting better at summarizing after telling the story twice before, but Tobias still jumps in occasionally to add any important details that she forgets. Junie is surprisingly quiet for most of it, aside from when she chastises them for being idiots, jumping down into dangerous mines with criminals and meeting up with crazy bugs who want to send them to the distortion world.

Finally, voice raspy and meal still only half-finished, Nia says, “And that’s the gist. This world—the Pokemon world—is basically in danger of falling apart entirely if we don’t do something to stop it. And the human world will go down with it.”

“Nia thinks Will might have some human connections who can help us find Xerneas, so that she can strengthen the barrier,” Tobias adds. “Or fix it afterwards, if it’s predetermined to break. Either way, we don’t have much go to go on, so we’re checking with him just in case.”

Junie’s expression is somber when they finish. She stares long and hard at the dirt, clearly deep in thought. Finally, she sighs and looks up. “Well. That’s a fine pickle. And just when I was getting comfy here, too. I guess we’ll just have to see what Will has to say, right?”

Nia blinks, then echoes the little bird. “We?”

“Well, yeah! I’m coming with you two to Will’s place, of course.” Junie says. “I just got you back. You aren’t ditching me again while you go off to save the world!”

Nia straightens up, heart lifting. “Really?”

Tobias groans. “Really?”

“Yup! You’re stuck with me, lizard-breath.”

“Greeeaaat,” Tobias drawls, using his flames to char a pecha berry cupped in his palms.

“But what about Bolat?” Nia asks.

Junie waves Nia off. “He’ll be fine! He was on his own forever before I showed up. As long as I come back eventually to show him I’m not dead I’m sure he’ll be cool about it. And I can keep training while we head south so I’m not slacking!”

Nia smiles, something in her relaxing. “That’d be great, Junie. We’d be happy to have you.”

“Happy is a strong word,” Tobias says.

Nia glances at him, afraid for a moment that she’d just made a decision for the both of them that he’s genuinely upset about, but he doesn’t actually look bothered by this development. He bites into his berry with a casual movement, his tail flame its usual calm flicker and his expression even. Just their usual banter, then.

“Aw, c’mon! I’m excited to be traveling with you guys again! I guess we should leave right away tomorrow morning since this is kind of time-sensitive, huh? We’ve got mysteries to solve, worlds to save, eldritch horrors to meet—oh! Nia!”

Nia jumps, nearly dropping the peeled chestnut in her hand. “Y-Yeah?”

“I wanted to ask earlier, but I didn’t want to interrupt. If you can communicate with Giratina through reflections and he’s on our side now, could we like. Call him?”

Nia stares at Junie, chestnut forgotten. “You want to talk to him? He’s…kinda scary.”

“That’s even better!” Junie says, hopping up excitedly. “It’ll be like we’re trying to summon demons at a sleepover. Wait here!”

Junie darts inside her and Bolat’s home, and Nia looks at Tobias, bewildered.

The charmander shrugs, apparently more or less unphased. “You did suggest we get in touch with him so he knows what we’re up to.”

“I…guess?”

Junie flaps out the front door in an unsteady bob, a small stone bowl barely gripped in her tiny claws. She drops it on the ground in front of Nia, then lands clumsily on the other side.

“There! Will that work? You can use your canteen water, right?”

Okay, guess they’re doing this right now. Nia sighs, once again putting the last of her food aside to grab her canteen and pour an inch of water into the bowl. Sunlight bounces across the water’s surface as it settles. The whole thing is about the size of Nia’s hand, just large enough to see faint reflections of the trees above them.

“Now what?” Junie asks, practically vibrating. “Do we have to chant or something?”

“I don’t actually know,” Nia says, frowning. “We haven’t tried to call him like this before.”

“He can’t be far,” Tobias says, leaning closer to the bowl. “He was following us on the trip over.”

Just as Nia’s about to try calling for Giratina, Junie shouts, “Hey, lord of nightmares! Get your butt over here!”

“Junie!” Nia hisses, wide-eyed.

“What?! You said he’s on your side now!”

“He is, but he’s also a god with a temper!”

“Uh, hey,” Tobias says, pointing. “He’s here.”

Nia looks down, surprised. Sure enough, she can see the faint reflection of Giratina’s silhouette in the surface of the bowl. Just his head, really, the rest of his body likely unable to fit into view.

“Whoa,” Junie breathes, feathers ruffled but expression delighted.

Giratina’s eyes narrow slightly, as if to ask what they want. Nia can practically hear his rapidly thinning patience.

“W-We saw you following us earlier, over the ocean,” Nia explains. “So I thought you were maybe wondering what we were doing? I figured we could give you an update. I-If you’d like.”

“We also wanted to see if we could contact you,” Tobias adds. “Which I guess is a yes.”

Giratina nods, looking back at Nia. Waiting.

She jerks. “O-Oh! Okay. Um. So we’re looking for a friend of mine, a human, who has been gathering other humans. We think he might have an idea of where to find Xerneas, since I know he’s been researching a lot of stuff and talking to a lot of people. So that’s why we’re, uh. Here. And traveling.”

Giratina seems to mull that over for a moment, before nodding his approval.

“Can he not talk?” Junie whispers, loudly.

“He talked to me in his dimension,” Nia says, feeling weirdly rude speaking about Giratina in the third-person when he’s right there. “But I don’t think he can speak to us through reflections?”

“But what if he has something important to tell you?”

Giratina shifts, catching their attention before Nia or Tobias can answer. He brings up a tendril-like wing, the giant talon at its tip settling close to the surface of the reflection and blocking out Giratina himself.

“Does he want you to…touch him? E.T. style?” Junie asks. “Can you even do that?”

Nia frowns, staring at the talon seemingly right on the other side of the water’s surface. “I…don’t know. He did pull me through a reflection in Shivergleam, but I kind of assumed that was like…a special ritual that Edme set up?”

“He did it at the river near the guild too,” Tobias grumbles.

Huh. He’s right. Which means…

Curious, and knowing that the legendary would have been able to kill her easily last time they met but decided not to, Nia lifts her hand and holds it over the water.

“You sure?” Junie asks.

Tobias reaches out and grabs Nia’s free arm, as if to make sure he isn’t left behind this time if she’s yanked through again.

With a deep breath, Nia dips her finger gently into the chilled water, trying not to disturb the reflections on the surface. Sure enough, after an inch or two, she hits not the smooth stone of the bowl’s bottom, but the dulled point of something else, ice-cold.

Giratina.

Nia’s brows raise. Curious, she dips the rest of her hand into the bowl. While she can’t wrap her hand around the sheer size of the claw, it’s undeniable that she has surpassed the depth of the bowl itself. Like a magic trick.

“Whoa,” Junie murmurs again.

Satisfied for now, Nia pulls her hand free, amazed to realize her fur isn’t even wet. She blinks down at the water as it settles. Giratina has pulled away so they can see his face again.

“So when you’re around, you can make any reflection into a portal to the distortion world?” Tobias asks.

The legendary nods.

“Does that only work for Nia? Or for anyone?” Junie asks.

Nia doesn’t know how Giratina does it, but she can practically feel his exasperation through the reflection.

“Oh, r-right. Yes or no questions, Junie.”

“Fine, fine! How about this—can anyone go through a portal you open?”

Giratina nods again.

The three of them sit back as one.

“Huh,” Nia says. “I’m not sure that really changes anything? But I guess it’s good to know that we can check in with you any time if we need to.”

“Could be a helpful escape route in an emergency,” Tobias muses, hand at his chin. “As long as we find a reflection large enough.”

Giratina suddenly jerks, looking off to the side. His eyes narrow. He looks back at them, as if asking if they’re done here. There must be another one of those rumblings in the rift that Nia had experienced while there. A sign of the coming disaster. He probably wants to check it out to make sure it’s nothing more serious.

“I think that’s all we know right now. Um. Thank you for answering?” Nia says, feeling awkward about how exactly she’s supposed to sign off with a legendary.

Giratina nods, then slips out of sight. The reflection of the trees overhead and Nia’s curious face, leant over the bowl, flicker back into sight.

The three of them are quiet for a moment, digesting that experience.

“Okay, so. World-ending terror aside, that was pretty awesome,” Junie says. She hops up, looking all too excited. “We should try to summon more horror monsters before we have to get on the road tomorrow! Bo told me about this Pokémon called Darkrai who gives you nightmares. I don’t think he does it to mess with people, but let’s pretend he does because that’s much scarier.”

Nia can’t help laughing. The tension that had settled over them breaks instantly.

“Darkrai’s a legendary, feather-brain,” Tobias says. “He’s probably already dormant.”

“But he’s the god of nightmares or something! So maybe he’s immune to sleep stuff!”

Nia relaxes and finishes the last few bites of her meal as the two of them start up another silly argument. The exhaustion of the flight and the day’s antics are finally starting to weigh on her, but for at least tonight they can rest here with Junie and Bolat.

Suddenly, with just one more friend at their side, everything ahead doesn’t seem quite as scary.

#pmd #pokemon mystery dungeon #skarmory #talonflame #rookidee #braviary #pokemon #tesha writes #tesha draws #pmd seekers of soul

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yuusishi · 17 hours

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Could I request Silver, Ace and Deuce (separately) reacting to their s/o calling out Crowley for being useless and neglectful and how, if it weren't for ADeuce, they would've loved to watch NRC burn?

. . . ONLY EXCEPTION

pairings : Silver , Ace Trappola x gn!reader

genre : hurt/comfort-ish? has hints of fluff

cws/tws : yelling & cursing

a/n : sorry I was only able to do Ace and Silver !! I couldn't think of much to write about for Deuce 😭😭😭also I was doing this in the middle of a bunch of class breaks for a month so it may be messy lol

“You’re finally here, [Name]!” Crowley said enthusiastically, “As you know, there’s an upcoming festival in Sage’s Island that Night Raven College is—” “Let me guess, you want me to work on it” you said, a deadpan expression on your face, “Yeah, work on some stupid festival in an island in a world I don’t even belong in and was brought to for no fucking reason” the Headmage stared at the growing annoyance on your face, not knowing what to say. “Now, [Name], it won’t be that bad, so let’s settle this calmly” you clicked your tongue, “That’s what you said before! I’ve had to deal with a bunch of overblotting students and research how to get home on my own, all that then what were you doing? Nothing!”

A couple students started to gather outside the Headmage’s office upon hearing the commotion, and one of them was … . “If it weren’t for him and the others I would love to watch this stupid school burn to the ground.”

SILVER !!

Silver was one of the students that walked closer to the Headmage’s office to inspect the yelling. As he walked closer, he started hearing a familiar voice, his eyes widened in shock seeing that it was you giving Crowley a piece of your mind.

He’s not fond of hearing yelling (minus Sebek’s, but even then he tells him off if he’s going too far), it disturbs everyone and causes a scene. So imagine his confusion seeing you leaned down towards the Headmage’s table pointing a finger at him while Crowley just sank down his chair even further.

As much as he would've loved to go right in and calm you down himself, he could tell this was an issue that you wanted to deal with yourself. So, he waited until you ceased your barrage of insults and rants towards the Headmage and marched off outside the office, by this time the other students just began to ignore the scene and walk to their respective clubs and groups.

Seeing you walk out, Silver didn't waste a second grabbing your hand and asking in a worried tone if you were alright. He wasn't planning on forcing any explanation out of you, he already knew how you were treated by the Headmage, he just wanted to know what caused all this.

In the end, whether or not you explained yourself, he still pulled you into his arms in an attempt to comfort you. Silver didn't know what words to use, all of them felt wrong to say at the moment, so he just settled for just wordlessly holding you until you let go of him.

After this he'll make sure that you're no longer being overworked by the Headmage (reluctantly, he needed to ask help from Malleus due to his power as a Housewarden) and that, as much as he would love for you to stay, he would help you with everything within his power to get you home.

ACE TRAPPOLA !!

Ace walked you to the Headmage's office before you headed in, chatting with you on the way but he could read like an open book that faint look of irritation that you tried to mask.

He isn't one to always go against authority, only ones he knows is doing wrong. Hell, he talked shit about the Headmage with you back then when the situation wasn't that bad just yet.

So as he stood leaning against the dark walls outside the office, he and other students flinched hard hearing yelling coming in from the inside. Without hesitation, he busted in the office and saw you berating Crowley.

He felt conflicted for a moment, he wasn't sure if he should pry you off the desk or let you let it all out, he didn't know the full extent of the stress that you were put through but he sure as hell knew most of it.

For the sake of not risking expulsion, he pried you off of the surprised Headmage and dragged you out the office, much to his surprise you didn't fight back.

"What the hell was that!?" he yelled, he sounded angry but you wished he wasn't. And he really wasn't, he was worried instead.

Worried about the repercussions you would face for doing that to the Headmage. What if you get suspended, or worse expelled.

Ace wasn't the best at comforting people, so his solution was taking you out to an isolated bench in the campus with some snacks he bought.

You don't need to speak, hell, you could space out the entire time and he wouldn't be bothered at all. He knows you're not feeling the best, so he just sits there until you're ready to start talking.

#twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #silver x reader #silver x you #silver twisted wonderland #twst silver #ace trappola x reader #ace x reader #ace trappola #ace trappola x you

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space-matt · 2 days

Text

Jokes in life - death

chris.sturniolo x fem.reader

summary: One joke too many could cost the life of someone…maybe.

request: yes -> anon

cw: use of y/n, fake chocking, fake death, swear

author's note: after a long time I'm back with a small part that I managed to write between commitments. I hope you can enjoy it all the same. Tell me your opinions! ♡

*ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚༺

English is not my first language, if you see grammar and typing mistakes, I apologize in advance! I just ask you not to be rude to me ♡

*ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚༺

''Oh for your information it's not true,'' you say, pointing your finger at Chris's chest as you walk the streets of your neighborhood with your favorite ice cream.

Almost every night you ended up heading to your hiding place, the roof of a building abounding along the end of two streets further on. But this one, in particular, you just wanted to walk and look around.

''So it's not true that you went out with Mike the other day?'' Chris asks stopping in place to see how your expression changed from calm to surprise ''Yeah we went out but only because we're lab partners, that's all Chris'' you reply continuing to eat the ice cream from the cone that was melting in the meantime.

''The fact is it's not that I don't trust you but-'' in the middle of the sentence you start coughing but Chris continues to blink not caring about the noise coming from his beside.

‘'C-Chris'' you pronounce with difficulty and only at that moment the boy realize that you are choking ''OH JESUS'' he exclaims starting to pat you on the back but it seems to have no effect

< Stay calm Chris > you hear pronounced from his panicked mouth, and only then do you decide to end your charade.

'' Gotchaaaa'' you exclaim laughing as you see his bewildered face '' Are you fucking kidding me y/n?! It's not fucking funny, at all'' he says waving his arms and shaking his head.

From this episode, you have inaugurated the session of jokes for years, from the obvious to the serious ones.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Chris had been meticulously planning the ultimate prank for weeks, determined to pull off the prank of the year.

He wanted to recreate a home invasion robbery, a prank that was both extreme and daring but would undoubtedly earn him the top spot on the leaderboard.

As it stood, he was currently in first place, followed by Matt, Chris, and finally Nick.

Chris spent hours preparing for the prank, carefully plotting every detail to ensure its success. He knocked over chairs and moved furniture, creating a mess that would make it look like a real break-in had occurred.

With everything in place, all he had to do was pretend to be hurt to make the prank look authentic.

As he made his way upstairs to Nick's room, he remembered the fake blood that Nick had used for his Halloween costume and decided to use it to add to the realism of the prank.

You, on the other hand, were at the supermarket with Matt and Nick, picking up the necessary items for their next video titled < Let's Try the Odd Pairings > As you walked through the aisles, you noticed a Reese's bunny on the shelf and thought it would be a nice treat for Chris.

You picked it up and added it to the cart, continuing to gather the other ingredients needed for the video.

As you pulled your car into the driveway, you noticed something strange. The front door of your house was slightly ajar.

You quickly parked the car and grabbed your grocery bags, approaching the door with a sense of unease. As you got closer, you could see that the door was open just enough to let someone slip inside.

With confusion etched on your face, you cautiously pushed the door open and stepped inside. That's when you saw it - the house was in a state of utter chaos. Furniture was overturned, drawers were pulled out, and things were scattered everywhere.

Your mind immediately went to Chris. You called out his name ‘’Chriss..?’’ your voice trembling with fear. As you searched each room, your panic grew.

There was no sign of Chris anywhere. Your heart racing, you finally entered his bedroom, where you found him lying on the floor, his eyes closed and a red spot on his chest.

‘’CHRIS’’ You rushed to his side, shaking him and calling out his name, but he didn't respond. You started to panic ‘’GUYSS CALL AN AMBULANCE NOW!!!' you shouted to get the attention of the other two, who were rightly part of the prank and knew full well what was going on.

Chris was doing nothing but holding back his laughter, and being as calm as possible to get completely into the part

''Oh my god what have they done to you? Oh god I can't lose you, what am I going to do without you? I didn't even have the guts to tell you how much I've liked you since we were kids, how safe you make me feel and how much I love your dimple when you smile'' you say all in desperation as salty tears roll down your face

''WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GUYS? WE NEED HELP!'' You scream starting a real hysterical cry, only at that moment do Nick and Matt enter, who seeing you in this state decide to put an end to the joke, realizing that this has gone a bit too far

''C'mon Chris get up'' exclaims Matt coming towards you and placing a hand on your shoulder noticing your trembling.

You find yourself in a state of confusion as your vision remains hazy, and it takes a moment for you to realize that Chris has opened his eyes and is staring at you. You rub your eyes with the sleeve of your sweatshirt and whisper, ''...what?''

Chris, sensing your disorientation, informs you that it was all a prank. He pulls you in for a hug, but you push him away, still reeling from the shock of the experience ’’It's a fucking joke, what's wrong with you idiot’’ you express your anger and frustration 'I thought something bad happened to you and the stain-'' you say feeling more tears streaming down your face pointing on his chest ''-you went too far’’ You explain that his prank had triggered your anxiety.

As you sit on the edge of your bed, you feel a wave of emotions wash over you. You feel overwhelmed and suffocated, and the only thing you can think of doing is hiding in the bathroom.

You slowly make your way to the bathroom and shut the door behind you, hoping to find some solace within its walls.

Once inside, you lean against the sink and let out a deep sigh. You can feel the tears welling up in your eyes, and you know you won't be able to hold them back for long.

You rest your hands on the sink and let the tears flow freely, trying to release all the pent-up emotions that have been building inside you.

As you cry, memories of the past come flooding back to you, making you feel even more vulnerable and exposed. You can't help but think about the people you have lost in your life, and the thought of losing someone else fills you with dread.

You find yourself caught in a vicious cycle of bad thoughts, unable to break free.

Suddenly, you hear a knock on the door, ''Y/n can I come in?'' Chris asks from behind the door. You hesitate for a moment, not wanting to let anyone in, but the sound of his voice is enough to break through your walls. ''I don't want to see you'' you say try to compose yourself, wiping away the tears from your face.

''Please'' Chris pleads, his voice full of sadness and regret. You know he's crossed a line, but you also know that he cares about you deeply. With a heavy heart, you snap the lock so he can enter, preparing yourself for whatever comes next.

As he wraps his arms around you, you can feel his warm embrace, but you remain stiff at first. However, when his hands start caressing your back, you can't help but give in to the moment and relax. You let out a deep sigh as you feel his fingers trace gentle circles on your skin.

"I'm sorry," he whispers into your hair, his voice filled with remorse. "I shouldn't have pushed myself any further"

He pulls back slightly, looking deep into your eyes. You can see the concern etched on his face as he takes in your tear-stained cheeks.

After a few moments of silence, you finally speak up. "Don't ever do that again, please...I seriously thought the worst" Your voice is soft and shaky as you try to hold back more tears.

He takes a deep breath and continues "I swear, in fact, let's get rid of the prank contest...we're old enough for these things now. Are you in?" He takes your hand in his, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"I'm in" you reply with a little smile. "They're not for me anymore" he can't help but smile back, and you’re feeling grateful for his understanding and support.

After feeling overwhelmed and needing to calm down, you took some time to freshen up in the bathroom. Once you were ready to rejoin the group, you found Chris waiting for you outside the bathroom, ready to change his soiled T-shirt.

You both made your way up the stairs and into the living room where you were pleasantly surprised to find that Matt and Nick had taken it upon themselves to clean up the mess that had been created earlier.

As you settled into the comfortable surroundings of the living room, Chris reached out and took your hand, leading you out to the balcony where the sun was setting. You both sat down on the footstools and with your legs resting on the coffee table, you looked out at the beautiful view.

After a few moments of silence, Chris spoke up, saying, "What a day" you couldn't help but chuckle at his remark and responded with "For me we can also eliminate"

Chris then turned to you and asked "So... what you told me before is true?" you played coy and asked "Which of the many things?" knowing exactly what he was referring to, he replied with a pointed, "You know what”.

It seems that Chris is highly perceptive when it comes to your body language, even when you try to hide things.

You may have believed that he never pays attention to you, but the reality is quite different. The two of you have had feelings for each other since you were young, yet you both seem to be oblivious to this fact.

Despite your attempts to conceal your emotions, it appears that Chris can sense what you’re feeling, and perhaps he feels the same way.

As you bask in the warmth of the sun, lost in your thoughts, you hear a familiar voice calling out to you. You turn to see him standing there, his hand waving in front of your face. "Y/n, are you there?" he asks, his eyes meeting yours.

You feel a jolt of surprise at the sudden interruption, but quickly compose yourself and respond with a smile. "Yeah, sorry about that" you say, taking in his appearance, which seems even more striking than usual.

‘’It's true... but you don't have to feel sorry for me, even if you don't have the same feelings as me there's no problem at all, on the contrary, there are better girls than me and-‘’ as you begin to speak, he cuts you off with a gentle kiss on the lips.

At first, his lips feel firm against yours, but then they soften, and you can feel the warmth of his breath mingling with yours. In that moment, all your doubts and fears melt away, and you find yourself lost in the pleasure of the kiss.

You feel a warm sense of contentment and happiness wash over you as the kiss comes to an end. Your heart races as you hear him whisper on your lips

"I've always liked you Y/n and couldn't wait to kiss you" your mind is filled with a flurry of emotions as he kisses you again, and you can't help but feel grateful for this moment with him.

The softness of his lips against yours, the gentle touch of his hand on your cheek, and the warmth of his embrace all make you feel alive and loved.

You cherish this moment and hope that it's just the beginning of another journey together.

--------------------------------------------------------

Taglist: @sturniolosreads @mayhem-72 @dracoflaco @lyzsaphrodite @ifilwtmfc @xoxo4chrisss @soimightlikeoldmen69 @inlovewithmattstur @sturniolobendystrawsposts @tillies33ssss @junnniiieee07 @blackhorses-posts

#chris sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo #sturniolo #sturniolo x reader #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo fanfic #matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #nick sturniolo x reader #nick sturniolo #space matt #romance #one shot

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likscrazy · 2 days

Text

RED CAPE | P. Sunghoon

Lol i was doing communication homework, we are reading Little Red Riding Hood so I said why not

pairing: Sunghoon hybrid x female! reader

warnings: virgin reader, fuck boy sunghoon is actually a gentleman, kissing, insecurity, Sunghoon hybrid to be exact werewolf, slight corruption kink. english is not my first language so there may be grammal or spelling errors

genre: smut

The forest was dark and lush, and in its heart hid a wild and possessive being. He, a man with human appearance but capable of transforming into a wolf, watched the young y/n with hungry eyes.

Among the trees of the forest, the Sunghoon hybrid stalked the young y/n, watching her with a mixture of desire and possessiveness. Her amber eyes shone brightly as he followed her in silence, feeling the rapid pulse and the intoxicating scent she left in her wake.

She didn't stop to think about the consequences when he trapped her in her arms, her hungry lips seeking his desperately, until he spoke, "What are you doing here, little one?" she whispered, her voice husky and full of promises of pleasure.

y/n he swallowed, feeling a mix of fear and excitement course through her body. "Just...she was walking through the forest," she stammered, without looking away from those feline eyes that eagerly devoured her.

The hybrid approached slowly, her warm breath brushing against y/n's skin, making her shiver. "You know it's dangerous to be alone here, right?" she murmured before capturing his lips in a wild, passionate kiss.

Between moans and sighs, they melted into a fiery embrace, exploring every centimeter of her body with unbridled eagerness. Sunghoon's hands ran over y/n's soft skin, awakening sensations that the young she had never experienced before.

Where every caress, every kiss, was a promise of possession and mutual delivery. In the darkness of the forest, they merged into a single being, filling the air with moans and whispers of pleasure.

When desire consumed them completely, they looked into each other's eyes with overwhelming intensity. “I can’t resist you, y/n,” Sunghoon whispered, his voice shaking with emotion. "You are my weakness, my reason for being."

In the end, when the ecstasy left them, Sunghoon tenderly caressed y/n's face, his eyes shining with a warm, protective light. In that moment, in the midst of darkness and unbridled passion, the hybrid revealed his true self: a noble and tender soul, who was willing to do anything to protect the only person who had managed to touch her heart.

In the middle of the dark forest, in the heat of their passionate encounter, they discovered a bond deeper than lust. They promised each other love and complicity, clinging to each other in a fluffy embrace full of tenderness and promises of a future together, facing the world with courage and love.

I'm supposed to do homework but I start doing this, in reality I have more homework than I want to live 😭, I hope you like it although it doesn't make sense haha

#sunghoon x reader #sunghoon enhypen #hybrid x reader #werewolf sunghoon #sunghoon #sunghoon enha #enha x reader #enha imagines #enhypen #enhypen x you #sunghoon x y/n #kpop x y/n #kpop smut #kpop imagines #written by likscrazy #enhypen x y/n #y/n

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novlr · 20 hours

Note

I once saw a piece of writing advice that spoke to the idea that you should start and end a chapter differently. I suppose the idea was that it helps keep the story moving along. I thought it was good advice but didn't like the post and therefore cannot find the full explanation of this point. Do you have any advice like this? For starting and ending a chapter?

As a creative writer, you’re always looking for ways to improve your craft and keep your readers engaged. One piece of advice that can help you achieve this is by starting and ending chapters differently.

This technique can help keep your story moving forward and maintain your reader’s interest, but it is not the only technique you should employ. Like any other part of your writing, it’s all about variation, and knowing what serves your story best is the most fundamental part of improving your writing’s craft.

Starting a chapter

When it comes to starting a chapter, there are several techniques you can employ to grab your reader’s attention and propel your story forward. One effective method is to begin with action, throwing your character into the middle of a scene and immediately drawing the reader in. Alternatively, you can introduce a new character to shake up the story’s dynamics or change the setting to signal a shift in the narrative.

Opening with dialogue is another great way to quickly establish the scene and provide context for the reader. You might also consider posing a question that piques their curiosity or describing a vivid sensory experience to immerse them in the moment. Ultimately, the key is to experiment with different approaches and find what works best for the chapter you’re writing.

Ending a chapter

When it comes to ending a chapter, there are several effective techniques you can use to keep your readers engaged and eager to turn the page. One popular method is to end with a cliffhanger. You can then open the next chapter with something mundane. An example of this would be the shocking entrance of someone unexpected at the end of one chapter, then opening the next chapter with the revelation that is just the goofy uncle the character hasn’t seen in a while. Alternatively, you can resolve a minor conflict, giving the reader a sense of satisfaction while still leaving larger issues unresolved to continue into the next chapter.

Another option is to introduce a new complication, presenting an obstacle or twist that raises the stakes and propels the story forward. You might also consider ending with a revelation, where a character discovers something important or experiences a significant realisation that shifts their perspective.

Creating a sense of anticipation by hinting at what’s to come in the next chapter is another effective way to keep readers engaged, or you can end with a strong image or emotion that leaves a lasting impression on the reader. Experiment using these endings with the opening examples above, and you’ll soon find that there’s a rhythm you develop that suits your writing style.

Variation is key

The key to effectively starting and ending chapters is to mix things up and keep your readers on their toes. Don’t rely on the same techniques every time; instead, experiment with different approaches to find what works best for your story. By varying your chapter beginnings and endings, you’ll create a more engaging and dynamic reading experience that will resonate with readers.

For some chapters, a clear break will work really well, like the example of a cliffhanger that opens the next chapter with something far more ordinary than the reader was expecting. But other chapters will be well served by a simple continuation of the scene. Pacing isn’t dictated on a chapter-by-chapter basis alone; it’s all about the overall arc of the story and how everything fits together. There are no hard and fast rules for how to begin and end a chapter, so in the end, it all comes down to trial and error and seeing what feels right in service of the story you want to tell.

Additional tips

In addition to the techniques mentioned above, there are a few more tips to keep in mind when starting and ending chapters. Varying your chapter lengths can help keep the pacing dynamic and prevent the story from feeling predictable (although some stories are served by consistent length, so do follow your intuition here). Using transitions, like transitional phrases or imagery, can smoothly connect the end of one chapter to the beginning of the next.

Experimenting with different techniques and reading widely to study how other authors begin and end their chapters can provide valuable inspiration and insight. And don’t be afraid to rewrite your chapter openings and endings in as many versions as you like to see what works for you.

Ultimately, trust your instincts; if a particular starting or ending technique feels right for your chapter and serves your story well, then that’s the one you should go with.

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writingonleaves · 2 days

Text

were you sent by someone who wanted me dead? (did you sleep with a gun underneath our bed?) - jeremy swayman

pairing: jeremy swayman x original female character

warnings: swearing, pretty angsty. hopeful ish ending because i can't do sad endings, very personal but i think many can relate in their own way, cliche ish, barely proofread

inspired by + title: "the smallest man who ever lived" by taylor swift

word count: 5.6k

author's note: i'd argue almost every piece any author writes is personal, because it has their life interspersed through the words. but this one really is, because a majority of this is the exact same words i wrote years ago after a break-up. heard the bridge to this song and immediately knew i had to write something inspired by it. also trying a new format of sorts (maybe a bit meta??), so i hope you enjoy and lmk what you think!!

~*~*~

When Noelle Betsko walked away from Jeremy Swayman, holding back tears until the call dropped, she knew it was going to be a tough time for the foreseeable future.

It didn’t matter that the pandemic had forced them apart. She knew she would still feel him for months to come.

She did the only thing she knows how to do when trying to deal with things. The one thing she always resorts to as an aspiring novelist. Sometimes on her laptop when the words were spilling out too quickly for her brain to catch up, tears littering the keyboard. Usually in her old beat-up journal, scribbling in the cursive that Jeremy claimed he always loved (“It makes your handwriting unique”) with the pens he had gifted her just a few months prior.

At the age of 21, Noelle got her heart broken for the first time. At the age of 26, she’s about to publish her first poetry collection of sorts, all of the poems modeled after journal entries written throughout her life. So not really poetry, though her mother would say otherwise.

She swallows as she thumbs through the middle part of the first known and binded copy of “miscellaneous.” There are only eight entries in the whole collection that are taken verbatim from her past writing. These are the eight.

May 13, 2020 (three days post-breakup, crying in my childhood bedroom)

I don’t even recognize who I was and who you were in those writings before these pages filled with love and hope and happiness. I can’t even summon up those feelings anymore that I knew existed at one point. Those feelings of complete bliss and love for someone so deep you can’t explain it.

I’m mad at myself for not being able to conjure those feelings, because at one point, I did love you. How could something that was part of my daily life for over two years just disappear so quickly?

But now, I’m not mad at myself. I’m mad, but I don’t know where to direct that anger to. I feel a bit empty sometimes, but then frustrated the next. Sometimes I get sad, but not so much compared to the other feelings. I spent enough time being sad during our relationship.

When we broke up, on an annoyingly beautiful Tuesday in May — over the damn phone, mind you, which whatever, it’s COVID. Fine — You told me you felt like you had been putting more effort into us.

At the time, I didn’t react, but I’ve been thinking about how angry that statement made me. Makes me, actually. I was always very open with how much I gave to that relationship. How much it meant to me. How much it affected me. But I understand that with some people, sharing everything too much equates to things not meaning anything anymore. But you out of all people should’ve known that I mean everything I say.

I felt like I gave so much. I know I gave so much. When I told you I loved you, I always meant it. Every single time. When I told you I missed you, I always meant it. I wished you were right next to me at that moment. I mentally gave so much, because to me, I wanted to. You were always on my mind, always high up on my list of priorities. I never took us for granted.

I’ve been questioning if that was the same for you. Did you start becoming complacent?

The second thing you said that day that hasn’t left my head is that you knew me pretty well. And initially, I remember not thinking much of it. So I don’t doubt that; you always knew right when I was about to cry, even over the phone. You often knew when I was mad or upset, but when I look back now, you never pushed. Which is a good thing, to an extent. But it was a bad thing sometimes too. I knew you often wanted to give me space, but sometimes I didn’t want space. I wanted you to push. To try to understand. Maybe that’s unfair of me; it probably is. I should just say I want to talk about it more, right?

But if you genuinely knew me, you would’ve known.

After two years, seven months and 12 days, I still feel like I didn’t know you. Did I ever know you at all?

When people talked shit about you, I always defended you. And I still would defend you now. But lately, I've questioned what I’m even defending. All those good qualities that I thought you had, were they even real? Of course, I know some of them were, to a certain extent. But as I look back on us, there’s a lot of doubt about whether I even knew the person I called my boyfriend for so long. I know there was a point where you cared about me, but I can’t remember when.

I often felt like I was letting you know so much about my life, but you didn’t do the same. I get that sometimes a person just wants to forget about the bad and focus on the good with a person you like for awhile. I get that. But once that was happening every damn time? That should’ve been a red flag.

June 7, 2020 (twenty eight days post break-up, outside my childhood room on the deck)

I don’t understand how you can give so much to something or someone and have it not be recognized or appreciated or enough. If I wasn’t enough for you, how will I be enough for anyone?

I hope one day you’ll truly understand how much this hurt. Not just the breakup, but feeling like I was always being pulled in a direction I didn’t always want to be pulled in. Feeling I was stuck between a rock and a hard place and never ever being able to win. I hate that I settled so much in the last year. Because I should’ve demanded more, even though deep down I knew you were never going to be able to give it to me.

I think back to our past daily texts, and I just don’t get it. At one point, we both meant the things we said to each other.

Yet we still hurt each other.

This fucking hurts.

You’ve hurt me so much, but most of it wasn’t intentional, which I think is somewhat even worse. Because I’m not totally mad at you for causing the pain. You never did anything outright to cause me pain, but I still feel like you did.

Unintentional pain almost stings more than intentional.

When I asked you out that night after we were both on an emotional high, I took a chance. For once in my life, I took the leap, knowing that I could get humiliated or hurt or just straight up shot down.

Where did it all go wrong? Or, more realistically, how did we think that we could go through the wrong when it was there at the start?

I’m trying not to blame myself too much. Trying not to tell myself that I should’ve known better.

All those times, especially at the start, when I would ask you if you genuinely liked me, you always thought I was just trying to be annoying. But you never understood that I genuinely thought that way. My self confidence from the start was lacking, and you didn’t try to understand that, because I come across to everyone as confident and self-assured.

It hurt, when you would brush things off like that. I felt like you didn’t care.

And then, it got to the point where I stopped asking that question. Part of that is because I did become more confident and you did show that you cared, and part of that was because I knew it would piss you off.

The amount of things I was scared to talk about with you because I knew it would piss you off? I don’t wish that feeling on anybody.

I shouldn’t have been scared. I shouldn’t have been uncomfortable. But I was. And if you did notice like sometimes you claimed to, why didn’t you make it more comfortable for me? Was that too much to ask for?

So larger than life that at the end, you faded into just the smallest man who ever lived. Fuck you.

Was it too much to ask for when I just wanted to know why you were upset? You didn’t have to ever tell me the full story (lord knows there were times I didn’t), but was it too much to ask for something? You told me once that I’m the person you’ve told the most to. How? You barely told me anything. And when I wanted to talk to you, whether it was about growing up in Alaska or why you were in a bad mood last night, you always brushed it off. Always.

So I don’t feel so bad about feeling like I gave more effort. I gave so much of myself to you. If you really cared about me like you claimed you did, why couldn’t you show even just 1% of that care back? Or just meet me in the middle?

I could’ve tried harder to meet you in the middle, I’ll admit that. But you didn’t even give me a map or a clue how to.

I felt so fucking left in the dark. I felt left in the dark about my own fucking relationship, something that I should be completely sure about. If you really love someone and care about them, how can you leave them in the dark? How could you not even see that I was struggling to find a flashlight?

You did care about me. I know that. To some extent and at some point in time, you did care about me. But caring about someone and their well-being isn’t always enough.

Why couldn’t you have worked with me? When I was extending my hand out, why didn’t you reach for it? How can someone just be so blind? I mean, I’m practically always spelling it out for you.

Maybe I am being selfish. But fuck, I just wanted to be happy. At some point, you made me happy. When did I start making you feel like I wasn’t enough? Why wasn’t I enough for you?

It’s useless, in a way, to keep going about this. Because I know I deserve better. And we’ll both find people who are better for us. We just couldn’t be that person to each other.

I fucking loved you.

I wish it ended differently.

July 8, 2020 (fifty nine days post-breakup, in front of the lake)

I really really fucking miss you.

I do.

I miss being able to text you that i love you and not necessarily expecting a response until the next morning. I miss knowing that as soon as you wake up, you’ll text me back and assure me that yeah, you love me too.

I’m left feeling bittersweet as I look back on memories that are just splashes and not definite strokes on the canvas that used to be us.

I miss having you as a friend.

I’ve been having more urges lately to want to text you. And it isn’t even anything important. Just moments I experience throughout the day.

Do you get the urge to do the same?

July 19, 2020 (seventy days post-breakup, still in the same damn house)

It’s hard. It really is. And it kinda just hits you at random parts of the day. Sometimes I wake up from a dream that you were in and have to remind myself that it didn’t happen.

Sometimes it physically aches when I realize that you won’t ever help me put on my jacket again, or complain that my hair is in your face when we’re lying on the couch watching Brooklyn Nine Nine, or groan when I drag you up to dance with me (which you never improved on, no matter how many times I tried to teach you basic rhythm). I can’t view our song the same way anymore, and I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to.

The other day, I read some simple thing on Twitter. I don’t even remember what it was, but I do remember that for a split second, I could see your smile in my mind. But it wasn’t just any smile. It was the smile you gave me when you took me ice skating that first time. I remember asking you what you were smiling at, and you said that you just were taking in this moment. I don’t know if you took a mental picture that day, but I know I did. That day seems so long ago now.

In almost anything I do, you somehow pop into my mind or into the conversation. And it’s not even in a harmful way either. It’s because you were part of my life for so long. I see a dog on the street, and it reminds me of how you always stopped to pet every single one we’s see I write something in my messy handwriting, and I remember how you always used to complain that you couldn’t read the notes I’d occasionally leave around your place when you went away. I went to the doctor’s the other day, and they said I was 5 feet and 3 inches, which is just definitely not true, and I almost reached for my phone to text you, because you would’ve cackled and insisted that no, I’m 5 feet 2 inches and it wouldn’t even matter because I’ll always be shorter than you. It’s simple and minute things that make me miss you that much more.

I still can’t listen to some songs the same way anymore, but I can at least listen to them now, which is a feat in itself. I was unpacking from college and found the teddy bear you sent me the first extended time we had to be apart and had to immediately put that out of my sight. From those boxes also came photos that I had decorated my dorm room with, and to be honest, I’m glad now that I let you keep our best one. I deal with all my emotions, besides writing, by making Spotify playlists, and I made a new one earlier this week. I think it’s helping. It’s a slow process, this whole moving on thing, but it’s one that I’m trying to be grateful for, because like most things in life, you just don’t truly know until you go through it.

Sometimes, I find myself wondering how you are and how you’re healing. But, even though we’ve both changed since the day we met, if there’s one thing I know, it’s that you’re incredibly strong and stubborn. I hope that you’re finding some growth in this process too.

October 17, 2020 (one hundred fifty seven days post-break up, apartment in orono)

It’s been almost 5 months, and you still cross my mind everyday.

Why wasn’t I enough for you? Why didn’t you fucking tell me what you were thinking? Why was I the one who had to approach you just because I was just so done with the silent treatment?

But I’m not mad at you. Not anymore. The mad phase passed ages ago.

Closure is a fake word. Even a breakup as mutual and smooth as ours was still left me with so many questions that will probably never be answered.

Any breakup fucks you up to some extent. I knew it was going to mess me up even back when we were together. But not like this. Never like this.

But like anything in life, I guess you can never really prepare for what you think you might feel, because most of the time, you discover a whole new side of you that you never thought existed.

I don’t miss you. I don’t. I don’t feel that love in any way anymore.

But I did once.

You did too, right?

November 15, 2020 (one hundred eighty six days post break-up, fogler library)

I hate Halloween.

Though, it did bring me to you three years ago. I’m pretty sure I fell in love with you right then and there.

Three years later, you texted me on Halloween, five months after our breakup. The universe really, really wanted to fuck with me.

It was a tough night for you. I knew that. Because I know how you are after losing a game you should’ve won. But that didn’t mean that I owed you anything and had to respond.

We agreed on no contact if we ever wanted to stay friends. Clearly, friends is out of the picture now, but come on. A vulnerable text after a bad night because you know I would feel bad for you?

Fuck, you know how much I would hate that. You had to have known.

Just because we’re not dating anymore doesn’t mean that everything about you just disappears. I still know your tendencies. I still know exactly how my head burrows into your chest during a hug. I still know the actions I used to do that would be followed by you attacking me with a hug. I still could point you out in a crowd.

I looked for you in every crowd for years.

That stuff doesn’t just go away, no matter how much I want it to. But fuck. Fuck. Why did you text me?

I don’t regret how I handled it. I probably would’ve responded months ago. But just like you, I’ve grown these last couple of months.

It was comforting, for a split second, to know that maybe, just maybe, these past couple of months have been hard for you too. It makes me feel human. It makes me feel like I’m not crazy.

I’m glad you texted me. You gave me another level of closure I hadn’t known that I needed until then.

But fuck, dude. You know me better than that. You should know me better than that.

I hate Halloween.

November 26, 2020 (one hundred ninety seven days, at the coffee shop i brought you to when you came home with me two years ago)

I don’t regret loving you, but I hate you for what you did to me.

Or maybe not.

I hate knowing that even though we haven’t been in a relationship in a bit, it feels like sometimes, you’re on my mind the exact same amount when we were dating. I hate knowing that I gave so much of myself and my love to you, and it always felt unrecognized.

Fuck, will it ever stop hurting? Will I ever be able to have to stop myself from thinking about you? Will it ever stop?

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Happy birthday. I hope you enjoy it.

June 12, 2021 (three hundred ninety five days post-break up, in boston, visiting a friend)

Tonight, when a friend asked me about you and how I felt about how we ended, I was able to articulate my thoughts clearly. I’m really proud of myself for getting to a point where I can take the lessons I learned the few months after we broke up and acknowledge them in a succinct way without breaking down into tears. Just watery eyes and the occasional voice crack

I’m also proud that I can say that when we were dating, I lost a bit of myself. For months, it was really hard to admit out loud.

I’m proud of how far I’ve come. Sometimes, I wish I could call or text you about it, because I think you’d be proud too. And I know I’d be proud of you. I am, to be honest. I do break resolve once in awhile and check on you through various avenues.

I still haven’t seen you in person since the last time COVID made us say goodbye. Maybe I never will again. But day by day, I’m starting to accept that and be okay with it. I’m accepting that memories that used to be so painted in my mind are blurry or almost completely erased now. But that’s okay. Honestly, it’s probably for the best.

I wonder, when you think about it, if you think about different moments that I do. That’s the thing when something ends. You have to be okay with letting go of those moments and realizing that just because you forget them, doesn’t mean they weren’t important.

I don’t think I miss you. I hesitate in saying that. Because I’ve moved on and handled the aftermath of it better than I think both of us ever thought I could. When you hung up the phone for the last time, I proved to myself again that I’m stronger than I give myself credit for. I think we all are. But we don’t realize it until we’re thrown into a situation that we think we’ll never be able to overcome.

But we do. Whether it’s because we’re forced to because there’s no other option, it doesn’t matter. Because we get through. We move on.

I hope you're moving on.

And then it goes into other topics, graduating during a pandemic specifically and losing what’s supposed to be your last year of no responsibilities before adulthood. There are other poems in here that reference a past relationship, but not as much as these eight.

If there’s one thing that Noelle did change, it was taking out the details. Jeremy may have hurt her, but he doesn’t deserve someone possibly making a connection between these poems and their shared background. She’s not a famous author by any means, but she wanted to be careful.

Not that she makes that part of her life publicly known. People don’t need to know that her brother was Jeremy’s captain for two years at Maine and that’s how they met.

Noelle grew up going to rinks. She hasn’t gone to one since they broke up.

But also, what the fuck? It’s been five years since she’s dated the guy. She really is over it by now, even if his rise to stardom in the Bruins flittering on her social media feeds still sometimes has her swallowing a bit before she can continue with her day.

Brooklyn is far enough from Boston. But sometimes it feels like it’s right outside her door.

She’s proud of her first published work. She really is. People believed in her and after numerous notes swapped back and forth with her editor, she did it. She always knew she wanted to work in publishing. She never knew she herself would publish anything.

And here she is now, two weeks after the book release, in Boston, about to do a q&a and a signing. Apparently, “miscellaneous” has been on top of numerous lists and it’s flying off the shelves. Noelle can’t really believe it and tries not to think about it too much, trusting her agent with all of that.

She’s happy to talk about her work and process though. That she can handle. And she’s grateful for all the love.

After a signing at a local bookstore, she decides to walk the 20 minutes home in the Boston fall. It’s a bit brisk, but she doesn’t mind and she just wanders, belly filled with delicious sushi she inhaled for dinner with an old friend.

Of course it happens the one time during her walk when she doesn’t avoid eye contact with someone. The song playing in her earbuds fade out of her focus and she almost stumbles.

Jeremy’s eyes were always Noelle’s favorite thing about him. She thought she would’ve forgotten what they looked like by now. But clearly she hasn’t.

Her eyes quickly cast to the person next to him. It’s definitely a girl. They’re a bit too far away for Noelle to pick out details. But it’s enough. He’s walking on the side closest to the street. It’s a Friday Night in a bustling part of the city.

It hurts. She wishes it didn’t.

Even from far away, she sees his eyes blink in recognition. Noelle puts her head back down and walks faster.

(She cries in the shower when she gets back to the hotel. She had debated feeling super sorry for herself and going to the hotel bar but refrained)

She has a few free days in Boston before flying back to New York. When she wakes up the next morning, she debates on going home early. But no, she won’t let a three second glance at someone ruin her time here. She used to occasionally come here during her college days. She loves this city.

The city may be Jeremy’s, but she can make space for herself here too.

She takes her time at a cafe, people watching and eating some breakfast. As she takes her coffee to-go, she looks out the window at the bookstore she was in the night before for the signing. She almost drops her coffee.

Jeremy walks into the book store.

Now, Noelle is debating her options. What she should do is continue with her day and walk in the opposite direction. But she’s always been too nosy for her own good. And maybe a bit self destructive. She decides to leave the cafe and cross the street immediately, so impatient to where she’s almost tapping her foot as the pedestrian signal stays red.

As a writer, she’s no stranger to movie moments. The scenes written in books or movies where the timing is too accurate to be real. The situation too good to be true. But after a car speeds through an orange and she can finally walk, she stops in her tracks instead, feet glued down to the sidewalk.

Because Jeremy is right in front of her on the other side of the street. Her book in his hand. And he’s looking right at her.

The first feeling she can recognize in herself is anger. Anger at the way their relationship panned out. Anger at the way they ended. Anger at the radio silence the years following. Anger at him for everything. Angry at herself for everything.

The second feeling is, weirdly, shame, which she’s embarrassed by. There’s nothing to be ashamed of. But she feels it anyways.

The third, and perhaps the most prominent, is emptiness. Five fucking years later, and she’s brought back to the emptiness she felt immediately after they broke up. The emptiness that the person you loved isn’t yours anymore — who maybe wasn’t ever yours to begin with.

Before she can run, he’s already crossed the street to her. He looks naturally different as someone who you haven’t seen in five years would. But he also heartbreakingly looks the same.

“We should get out of people’s way,” Noelle manages to chokes out.

Jeremy laughs a bit. Her heart lurches. “Yeah.” He starts walking and she follows him wordlessly. This is his city after all.

He leads them to a bench under a tree with beautiful fall foliage. She puts at least a foot between them as they both sit down, staring out at the people passing. She can’t take the silence.

“I see you bought my book.”

“I did,” he replies evenly. “Congratulations. I always knew you would do it.”

She squeezes her eyes shut. Maybe if she squeezes hard enough she’ll forget when she originally pitched Jeremy the bare bones idea of the exact same book that’s currently in his hand. “Thank you. Congratulations to you too. On everything.”

“You’ve been watching?”

She shakes her head. “No. But, you know Seth and…yeah. It comes up during family calls sometimes.”

“Why didn’t you say hi last night?”

She looks pointedly at a couple walking their dog. “You seemed busy.”

“She wasn’t-that-it doesn’t mean anything.”

“Oh. Because that makes me feel so much better,” she spits out, before taking a deep breath. “Whatever. It doesn’t matter. We broke up ages ago.”

“I’m sorry,” she gives him a look and is slightly proud of how he seems to shrink into himself a bit. “I-I know it’s five years too late. I know I didn’t handle it as well as I should’ve. But for what it’s worth, I’m sorry.”

The thing is, Noelle always thought that maybe hearing an apology someday would make her feel better. But now that’s heard it, she’s not sure she does.

She swallows. “I appreciate that.”

“I’ve already read it, you know.”

“Read what?”

Jeremy runs a hand through his hair. “Your book. One of my teammate’s girlfriend recommended it and I asked to borrow it. It’s fantastic,” He looks down at the book in his hand. It’s like the cover is taunting her. “I wanted my own copy.”

“Oh.”

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For letting me off the hook with the poems I know were about me,” he scoffs, shaking his head at himself. “You could’ve written way worse.”

She can’t help but let out a chuckle. “I thought I was pretty mean.”

“Your definition of ‘pretty mean’ is tame compared to a lot of people,” he says, mindlessly flipping through the pages of the book. “You were always the kindest person, even when you shouldn’t have been..”

He puts his hand out in her direction, the hand with the book in it. She furrows her eyebrows. “What-”

“Could I get a signed copy?”

“Jeremy. What do you want from me?”

He sighs, taking his hand back. “A chance to apologize?”

“You’ve already done that.”

“Not in the way I want to and what you deserve.”

She lets out a sigh, turning to face him fully. “I don’t know if that would be worth my time or yours. I know the book just came out, but that was five years ago. I’m over it. Forgive and forget, right?”

“But do you?” Jeremy counters back. “Clearly, you don’t forget, which I deserve. But forgive?”

“We’re just going in circles now.”

“No we’re not,” he says firmly. “You’re just shutting me down because you don’t want to talk about it. I’ve had five years to prepare what I would say to you if I saw you again. You’re telling me you haven’t?”

“Of course I have,” Noelle tips her head back. “But also, what’s the point?”

“The point, is that I still love you.”

“Fuck you,” she says in a strained voice. “You can’t just-you can’t just throw that shit out there. Fuck you.”

He bites his lip, and to her annoyance, he laughs. But she listens more carefully, and it sounds very self deprecating. “I deserved that.”

“Yeah,” Noelle looks down at her feet. “So…what? You still love me?”

“I do.”

“And what are you going to do about that?”

“What are you going to let me do?”

“I live in Brooklyn.”

“I know,” she whips her head up. Jeremy looks sheepish, which she didn’t even think was something he knew how to do. “Seth mentioned it when we caught up a bit ago. I also still follow you on Instagram.”

She tries again. “It’s been five years.”

“And I’m here sitting with you and still feel the exact same way I did back then. Even more, to be honest.” He eyes her pointedly. “Any more excuses?”

Her voice softens. “You really hurt me.”

“I know. And I’m so sorry, Noelle.”

“I hurt you too.”

He shrugs. “We were young and stupid.”

“And we’re still not?” Noelle says with a snort before swallowing. “I’m not the same person you fell in love with.”

“I’m sure I’m not either. But I don’t know if there’s a world where I don’t love every version of you.”

“Even after reading the book?”

“Especially after reading the book,” he sighs. “Noelle, I know this is unfair of me. All of this. And I’m sorry it’s taken me this long to reach out. But I always intended to. And then you’re here? And I see you twice in two days? I’d be an idiot to not try. More of an idiot than I am, anyways.”

“Try for what?”

“A second chance? To be friends? Whatever you want.” He suddenly deflates. “Even if you don’t want anything to do with me. At least I’ll know.”

“Why did you never text me?”

“I thought about it a lot,” he admits. “I tried once, actually, after the high of a really good win. But it didn’t go through. I got the message.”

“The message?”

“You blocked me, right?”

Oh. “Yeah,” she lies. “I did.” She reaches into her bag for a pen and gestures for the book, which he gives to her, a curious gleam in his eyes. “I’m in Boston for two more days, including today.”

He takes the hint immediately. Eagerly. “I have a game tonight, but I’m free tomorrow.”

“Who are you guys playing?”

“Toronto. And I’m starting. Should be a good one.”

She hums non-committedly, scribbling on the inside of the front cover. She hands it back to him with a small, close-lipped smile. She nods at him to read the message.

to my first fan,

i still love you too.

xxx-xxx-xxxx

yours,

noelle

He looks up, eyes shining but a bit confused.

“I never blocked you. I just changed my number.”

“Oh.”

“And even if I still love you, I’m still mad at you.”

“I know. I’d be more surprised if you weren’t.”

She stands up, adjusting the bag on her shoulder and putting her sunglasses on. “Text me?”

His mouth splits wide into a grin. “Yeah. Yeah, of course.”

She backs away with one last attempt at a smile before turning down the street.

#k writes #hockey fanfiction #nhl #nhl fanfiction #nhl fanfic #nhl writing #hockey blurb #hockey writing #boston bruins #jeremy swayman #jeremy swayman blurb #jeremy swayman writing #jeremy swayman fic #jeremy swayman fanfiction #jeremy swayman x ofc #jeremy swayman x oc #jeremy swayman x reader

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momentsbeforemass · 20 hours

Text

Socks on the floor

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give it to you.”

That’s how today’s Gospel starts. Jesus is telling us that there’s the world’s version of peace. And then there’s God’s version.

The world’s version of peace is the kind you and I get when there’s a break in the action. Two things about that kind of peace.

One – it doesn’t last. You and I know this. Sometimes we even call it “a moment’s peace.”

Two – whether we worked hard for it, or it just happened, it’s fragile. It will be wiped away by the next thing that happens.

Because the world’s version of peace is the peace of the finished task. The peace of the sleeping child. The peace of the cancelled meeting.

It’s not a question of whether that peace will end. It’s just a matter of how and when.

It’s a peace that cannot last. Because it’s just a break in the action.

And because it is just a break in the action, it’s never there when you and I need it most – when we’re right in the middle of things.

Especially things like death, divorce, addiction, illness, job loss. The hard things.

So, what’s God’s version of peace?

God’s version of peace – is peace in right in the middle of things. Even the hard things.

The difference between God’s peace and the world’s is the source.

God’s peace doesn’t come from a break in the action. God’s peace comes from making a place for God in our lives.

God freely pours out His peace for all of us. But you and I have to be smart enough to take it.

To do that, we have to build habits of peace.

That is, we have to intentionally build places within our lives, within our routine, and within ourselves to be with God.

We can have set times for Bible reading and prayer.

We can have landmarks (places, images, things we do, etc.) that we us to call us to God.

We can have moments and feelings (good, bad, or indifferent) that we turn into calls to prayer.

It can be as formal or informal as we like.

Whatever we do, we have to actually do it. And it has to lead us to a spiritual place.

But we can’t treat that place like grandma’s house. A place we only go to for Christmas or when someone dies.

We can’t treat that place like a storm shelter. A place we only run to when we hear the tornado sirens.

That place has to be our home. The place we live in, every day.

And you and I have to really live in that place of God’s peace.

Until there are dishes in the sink and socks on the floor.

Until you and I are talking with God – taking things to God in prayer, telling God all about all of it, seeking God’s will for the big things and the small stuff – talking with God like our dearest friend.

Not just while we’re reading the Bible or saying our prayers, but in the middle of everything.

Even while we’re dropping our socks on the floor.

Today’s Readings

#Peace #God's peace #Peace in the middle of things #Habits #Socks #God #Jesus #Catholic #Christian #Church #Catholicism #Moments Before Mass

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crying-fantasies · 3 days

Text

Killing me softly with his song (1)

Masterlist

Part 1: Bleed it out | part 2 | part 3 | part 4

Since his time on Dead End almost everything was crude, harsh and hateful, there were moments of happiness along the way, some of betrayal and undying loyalty which he professed with pride, showing the badge on his chassis and the revolution of it's own meaning to save his home, his planet as a whole with all it's inhabitants.

Those times are long gone, he remembers with a heavy thought on his shoulder armor, not even capable of returning to his planet due to the unnumbered atrocious acts of the past and hateful glances attracted to his very name, he understands, he really does.

His acceptance of it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt.

Earth isn't any better, humans look at him in the same way if not worse, but Soundwave is needed here, at least.

It's almost laughable how humans return to their self-destructive behavior quicker than anybot expected, Soundwave was thinking of a secretly return to Cybertron with his cassettes, saying goodbye to the very few things he liked of the black water planet with total intentions of never coming back, that was his plan, before noticing a little elephant calf, almost in the verge of starvation, collapsed next to the rotting corpse of what he supposed was it's carrier, it's mother, wounds of bullets on the head, ivory nowhere to be seen.

Sadness, sickness, rage and vengeance is what blooms in his spark at the very second, it's mostly his first reaction and feeling what makes him take the calf and secure it in his arms before starting his way to the nearest animal clinic that his friend once mentioned, one that helped the young calf, he finds it and hope the humans that come running to the calf get to save it, as their drive to heal is bigger than the obvious fear on their organic optics after seeing him and the badge on his deck.

Soundwave returns to where the body is, scanning the whole area with his sensors, and notes that there are other bodies around.

That's enough to stay in Earth for a little longer, for how long? He doesn't know.

Humans don't say much, letting him do what he does best while finding hunters, decimating their campsite and letting them be found by human authority, it's their luck if that happens in a few days or a whole month when he let's them trapped in a tiny cage with no food around and it the middle of the wilderness, for once to be at the mercy of others.

Ironic life is, now they need him, Soundwave has always been good cleaning his trace and many organizations are interested in his work so far and want him and his cassettes not only in Africa but almost worldwide, moving around, it's a tentative offer when they bring energon to the table, reminding him of the low energon levels that Laserbeak and Buzzsaw had to endure to be with him in this mess for his softness, again, if Ravage was here he would've called him soft before helping him anyway and say that it was fine, makes him remind of Rumble and Frenzy, worried for them, but knowing better than contact them, both weren't pleased after he was an autobot ally.

There's no real place to go, but wandering around isn't bad either.

So off he goes, and among all of it, he finds you, as a scared passerby, a drop in an ocean of hundreds, thousands, that evade him at contact like a rock in the middle of the river before reuniting with the wildness of massive water bodies, but you change from a drop to a leech, attaching near, not leaving his side even when he did call you leech in the face.

You stay, and it's hard to accept it, to make it part of his life, maybe it's the feeling of the many losses along the way, something missing, Ravage isn't at his side, the twins are thriving on their own in this planet, and he needs something to fill at least a space, you make a great replacement to some point before you are your own person for him, "it's okay", you tell him, little hand holding his servo when, once again, he let's everything be too much, "it's fine", for a moment he wants to call you a liar before you point to your head, Soundwave has never told you, but alas, you are observant, an organic mind is strange, but in that strange place where he has to try hard to discern something, electric pulses wild and way too fast, pumping life around, answers that almost escape his grasp.

In the end, he does find something among all of it, and makes him take distance from you, the "I like you" is supposed to be in an amicable way, but he is sure it's long been something more, and your strange attachment to him isn't strange anymore, but it doesn't mean it is welcomed, at first.

Ditching you when he returns to his own matters is simpler, because what you want from him is impossible, makes his armor tremor with disgust, after coming back he is weak when you are still there, letting you get near, again.

It's only when you aren't there anymore that he keeps moving, thinking about you from time to time, and finds you once again without even trying, Soundwave Is good on his own job to trail after what he wants, even if he doesn't want to do it, even if he does it without noticing, feigning ignorance and disinterested when you approach, once again, to call out his designation with hardly covered adoration, it's only a matter of time before it isn't you who takes his servo on your hand, but the other way around, and it doesn't take much for him to let go of the tremors on his frame when your skin makes contact with him.

That's how it started, and that's how he came all this way to his own present, with one of the most delicate and little living being he has ever had in his servo every night, lulling the new spark to recharge with the combination of human music and the soft and warm extension of his EM field, mimicking the beat of your heartbeat until he gets creative enough to make a song that uses your BPM as guide, his progeny answers, making little pulses now and then, moving as he can, for a while it makes him settle down in a single place, waiting for the moment he is ready to go on again.

For a moment the name Mainframe crossed his processor, thinking otherwise due to respect for his old friend's family that would be less than thrilled to know his name was put on a cybertronian sparkling, even if it was only a code name, then he is open for options when you make a funny face when he wants to call them Emporium, even Buzzsaw looked near to burst out in laugh, the twins have no reservations once they come back and are ready to laugh at him.

It's when the little one starts crying that the name Mayhem was ideal, Soundwave can still feel the pain in his audial receptors from the time his sparkling was a few jorns old, so high that you couldn't hear what was happening while every cybertronian collapsed on the floor, spark almost giving up by the sheer power of the sonic attack, and while you were worried for them he was so, so proud before an almost inexplicable terror was casted over him as he put Mayhem inside his cassette dock.

Everyone needed a moment to be seen as nonthreatening before getting near Mayhem, but Soundwave just couldn't let you by yourself with the sparkling so he returned quickly even when he was the most busy, maybe he was being overprotective as you said, it was most likely you were correct but he didn't really care when he stayed more time near, Soundwave would never care if he had what he thought would be impossible right in the palm of his servo and got to keep it, protecting you both to the point of others not really knowing the whole situation.

He is still worried if he made the right choice, in the cybertronian record you don't exist or don't have enough importance above your kind, by the same standard Mayhem doesn't exist, and since Orion Pax doesn't remember him there is no way to stop an enforcer from coming to your door and seizing him down, as if he will ever let that happen in the first place, it'll be a pain to create an identification for the time his sparkling shows the desire to go back to Cybertron in the future, it's natural and Soundwave would never stop Mayhem from the desire to know his roots, but it'll take time if his information is reliable enough, Soundwave is still worried about you.

The council is better, to some degree, of that he is sure, Windblade and Bumblebee are part of it just like many other mech that has an already formed idea of the badge on his armor.

Soundwave will never stop being a decepticon, since the cause is a part of his function and always will be, but it'll never be yours or Mayhem's, the burden is great as it is, and he can carry on with that alone while you two stay away from his past and away from what he did while fighting a war without winners.

Above all, he wishes you two never put a single feet or ped on the planet, way too worried of what would happen, what they could do to both of you, the image of the calf next to the decaying body of it's mother is twisted and he sees his sparkling clinging to your lifeless body, and it's an image that keeps him online even in the most silent night, making sure your heart is still pumping primordial fluid and Mayhem's spark pulses in similar time.

If, by some very mistake of his, someone were to put even a single digit on you, if they even dared to use you to get back at him or to make him pay for the many errors of his past, he soon realizes, he couldn't take it, he wouldn't be able to resist if your life was extinguished, and the idea of solitude after living surrounded by your love is insufferable, the idea of not even been able to meet you in the all spark is even worse, because not even death could bring him back to you in any way.

Every second is important, he doesn't have to remember it because he has it very present every day, and every one of the things you do or say are registered on his data banks for the moment you really are no longer.

He dreads the mere idea of it, but denying it on his processor will not stop it, so he can only live in the moment and appreciate every second to the fullest.

"Wave wave wave" you come running, as fast as you can with your little struts, catching his attention instantly, searching if there is any danger to make you act like this, but no, he has been sending electric pulses just to be sure and nothing has changed in the last 3 days, but you come anyway, a smile on your little face, Mayhem is with you and that peculiar sharp dentae of his in his full display as he imitates you in your gibberish, exclaiming a "Da da da da da" that catches his attention.

He has noticed that sound from a while ago, he didn't know it was from Mayhem, Soundwave recalls the word, how little humans say it while going to their sires' sides in barely stable legs, seeing it so often while his co-workers are around him and showing with that little details how they have come to trust him, the very same trust he puts on them and in you as he let's you put Mayhem on his servo to get a better look as his sparkling taps with his little and stubby servo above his decepticon insignia.

Soundwave noticed, once again, that your time together would never be enough.

#reader insert #x reader #transformers #tf mtmte #transformers x reader #transformers idw #angst #transformers x human reader #transformers soundwave #soundwave x human reader #soundwave x reader #idw soundwave #tf soundwave #soundwave

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destinygoldenstar · 1 day

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Ninjago Dragons Rising Season 2 - Is It Good Or Nah?

So, I'm late to the party, aren't I?

Well I've had so much work that I think I'm having an existential crisis. So I had to wait till I had a free day to watch this season because I wanted to watch it with my GF.

We got to Episode 6, and then what did my boss do?

Slap me in the face with long work hours several days of the week.

I feel like I'm in a spiral of work after work after work with no purpose to life besides failure cause I can't trust myself to be capable at anything-

ANYWAY. We finished it now.

You know what the insane part about the season is? That it got the show trending on Tumblr.

That's an INSANE level of hype right there.

So I seriously had to ask myself "What the actual f**k happened in the show that caused THIS much hype?!"

So... here are my thoughts on the season.

SPOILER WARNING

Okay, so this may be a factor of my judgement, but due to my schedule, I was forced to watch only 6 Episodes one day, and then the last 4 Episodes today. Keep that in mind.

When it came to the first half of the season, was it good?

Yes. Obviously.

Was it living up to the insane level of hype?

Uh... not really for me??

Now, don't take that as a negative. This season is still REALLY good.

After the first season took awhile to get started as it needed to set up its characters and this new world, it makes sense for this season to throw the punches immediately.

The season gets started with its main plot right away with Ras immediately putting his plan into action, and by Episode 2, it's very clear the threat level he opposes and it's believable that we should be intimidated by what he wants.

Even though in Episode 2's fight, while AMAZINGLY choreographed, I was just screaming at the screen "HIT THE PERSON HOLDING THE GONG."

Like seriously, more than one of the characters in this fight can use projectiles with their powers AND they have a blaster in the Bounty, and the show never says that Ras has some sort of armor defense preventing him from getting blasted. He's literally standing out in the open. And the gong is clearly what's giving Cinder power. So HIT THE PERSON WITH THE GONG.

GOSH.

Anyway, that's not important. What's important is that this season's fight choreo is genuinely AMAZING. I am obsessed with the way the camera moves with the characters in these fights you have no idea. I was genuinely blown away by the last episode's fight in particular. But more on the ending later.

What also shocked me was how BRUTAL some of the stuff that happens here is, which caught me off guard.

I mean, Episode 2 has Euphrasia getting ambushed and crashed off the Cloud Kingdom with clear injuries, and Wyldfyre getting her leg SHATTERED. Like, WHAT?! HOW OFTEN DOES THAT HAPPEN?!! (Even though the latter's healing was unrealistic. Like, it would realistically take months for an injury like that to heal. Not a critique, just saying.)

Ras body slams Jordanna at one point. He puts Arin in a CHOKEHOLD. And also beats him up so brutally... like OMG this guy does not mess around.

The Fear Cave Trial also REALLY got me tripping. Not only was it such a visually appealing moment, but it also, as the same suggests, showed several character psyches that were insane.

Except Kai for some reason. That's gonna drive me NUTS until I get an answer. WHAT DID HE SEE-?!

Then we get to the dragon mentors, and...

Yeah the season kinda loses me in the middle.

Don't get me wrong, I love the character bits here as much as anyone. But with how dyer they made the threat of Ras before, Ras and his forces take a backseat in the middle portion of the season and we're mostly just sitting at these training grounds talking. And for four episodes of it? It's a little grating, even if it is important.

The middle is mostly where most of my issues with the season stand. And here's where I get all my negatives out of the way:

Like I said, because this season is so long, there's an awkward pause in the conflict on the dragons plotline to learn this Rising Dragon Technique. Which I wouldn't mind if it wasn't FOUR EPISODES of it.

With the exception of the attack at the Land of Lost Things ONCE, Ras's army doesn't go after the ninja at all. I can kinda get the dragons group since they didn't have Bonzle, but he has to know that they ARE a threat, right? They're obviously trying to figure out how to stop you.

And even with the group that has Bonzle, what they NEED, the forces that go after that group is the Administration and the one off magician man villain, the former really didn't need to be in this season even if it was for a compelling Jay cameo, and the latter has overstayed his welcome at this point and I just rolled my eyes when he showed up on screen.

I'm all for Cole being a badass as much as the next guy, but WHY this magician man, who at this point, is so disconnected with the main antagonistic forces that he serves no purpose?

Why not, I don't know, use this screen time instead to explain what in the world happened with Cole when he left?

Seriously, the first season had this huge cliffhanger with Cole's character and him going after Wu's ghost. I wonder what's gonna happen to him and what he's gonna find out-

Oh. He's just back.

That to me is a huge disappointment. What was the point of him leaving the Lost Family in the first place if this journey was basically nothing? He doesn't even talk about it! COME ON NOW.

Also I think Zane should get slay pass on the Administration guy that called him equipment. What do y'all think?

I don't like Egot. Or whatever his name was. He's very condescending and cryptic and talks down to his only hope of the world being saved. But I think I'm supposed to dislike him for it, and there's gonna be more of his characterization revealed later, so don't take this one as a critique. The female one is great though.

The sorceress lady was... a choice in the narrative. My one critique for the ending was the potion shenanigans. Not because they were bad, but because they just felt so out of place among everything else. Like, "Oh, this finale is too dark and intense! We need to occasionally cut to wacky shenanigans with this sorceress's magic to prevent kids from feeling too much dread!"

I don't know, for me, I would've placed this stuff with the Administration instead, and instead have the group fight Jordanna, lose, and have her get away and flow that to Arin getting to her. Especially since the Administration posed such little threat to them and they even say such.

(I also have a theory that this sorceress is Wyldfyre's birth mom. I have no evidence to back this up besides "They both have red hair and similar facial structure")

With Cloud Kingdom getting taken over and Euphrasia captured, I thought she would have more of a role to play in this since this is, you know, her HOME and she's their guardian.

But nope. She does next to nothing up until the very end and plays prisoner and waits for the ninja to save her.

For gosh sake girl, you're the master of wind. FLY.

And finally, my last critique, Cinder.

Yeah I'm sorry, I'm not buying this character so far. Not that I don't think he'll have anything to do in the second part, but for how threatening he was in Episode 2, that threat level kinda vanishes in the middle and only comes back at the end. He does next to nothing and we learn nothing about him other than "He likes power". Jordanna is probably more unlikeable, but at least she has conflict going on with Ras and her magic, and she still serves more of a role in the plan besides being a foot soldier.

And... yep. That's all my critiques for this season. Which all seem pretty minor.

You know what this season is real good at? Characters.

As though that wasn't obvious already.

I did NOT expect Bonzle to play any major role at all, I thought she was just gonna be the dry and cynical side character. But no. She has a history. She has a life. She has emotions. All of which REALLY shine through at the end when you hear her voice have more range in it. The VA killed it. I ended up feeling so bad for her.

Especially considering what happens to her.

They're also not even hiding it anymore with Geo x Cole. They're just NOT. I love them and I hope we see more of their relationship in the future.

I genuinely don't understand the critique of "Geo is so selfish referring to him as Cole's family when it's obvious Cole has other people in his life."

Well no shit, you ever heard of a character flaw?

But it's also a completely understandable flaw. You guys aren't forgetting the part where Geo was abandoned for being a mixed race, right? Of course he's gonna cling to someone as compassionate and encouraging as Cole.

The Jay cameo was nice. I expect him to play no role in this season, but it's really compelling what they showed and I was satisfied with it.

Lloyd's conflict was handled very well in my opinion.

What's it called when it's PTSD, but it's about future events rather than past events? Foresight Traumatic Stress Disorder? FTSD? Yeah let's go with that.

For a kids show that glosses over trauma, (That's not a Ninjago problem, that's a kids show problem), it was really refreshing for them to not do that for once. It's actually explored and talked about and Lloyd is given advice on how to cope with it, and he freezes up in panic attacks when these visions happen and-THANK YOU. THANK YOU FOR NOT IGNORING HOW HARD SOMETHING LIKE THIS IS.

Seriously, as someone who is going through stuff like this, minus the magic element, it spoke to me a lot. It really shows that this show grew up with me, and I both love and hate that.

I do think this sort of arc is going to hit hard for adults much more than kids.

Are kids constantly terrified of the future and getting paralyzed with these fears and finding it difficult to cope with the traumas that is time and human life?

No?

Kai is also a standout in this, especially towards the end. This is by far the best Kai has been in a long time in terms of quality. I love how one of his most significant flaws gets addressed here, that being his overreliance on himself and his own abilities over the others, who he feels responsible to protect.

And the way he grasps with that and learns to let loose like he did as a child back in the old days through what he loves the most, that being his family. And the flashbacks with him and his sister. And the whole sequence of him learning Rising Dragon - AUGH ITS SO GOOD.

How poetic is it that the character most devoted to family since childhood is only cocky and angry because of his own desire to be the one with power to keep them safe, gets power by letting that go, being a kid again, and joining the same roots as his own family?

AND THEN HE GIVES UP HIS LIFE FOR THEM-

And finally, Arin.

Oh you poor sweet, sweet child.

First of all, yes, I am completely subscribed to the theory that the show is building up Arin turning on the ninja and becoming a villain. It's all there. It all fits. The amount of times they say how sweet he is as though that's gonna get lost. The dragons, the creators of the world, the gods basically, telling him he's not good enough. Ras confronting him. Sora's stunt even after she's been the most encouraging of him, like the BETRAYAL there. It's all there. And I will be posting my theory scenario on this don't you worry.

BUT, I don't think that's the route they're gonna go. Kids show and all of that. They wouldn't do that to one of their main characters. Unless you're Star Wars. At most I think Arin will be tempted by Ras's master's power in an episode and even do it, but then with the power of love and friendship, it'll get fixed.

So instead I'd rather say that Arin, by far, has the BEST power crisis arc of the entire show so far.

I LOVE that he doesn't get powers. That's something the original show would've done. I LOVE that he doesn't figure anything out in the end and his inner doubts get proven correct. That's something the original show would not have the guts to do.

I liked Arin in the first season, but he didn't interest me too much. Mostly because Sora had the lion share of focus in the first season. Here though? He might just take the crown for THE most relatable character. And I both love and hate it so much.

Like, seeing everyone else succeed in mastery while you can't even figure out your own thing. You get told you have a natural talent and a lot of potential and that you're good at a lot of things, only for that to be put to the test in the real world and you end up letting everyone down. Even when your loved ones encourage you that you are good enough and you're special in your own way, you can't get those voices out of your head and you mess up again and again and again to try and meet the world's expectations. Then those in charge tell you you're not good enough and wasted potential. Then you try everything out in the real world anyway and you FAIL, and those that doubt you and your own insecurities get proven correct as you're left a broken mess of a young child who doesn't know what the hell they're doing-

I'M IN THIS SHOW AND I DON'T LIKE IT.

I probably love Sora more as a character, but I will admit I grasp towards Arin more right now. Sora's a great trans allegory in a world that hates trans people. But I'm not trans so I relate to it a bit less. Arin's a great autistic allegory in a world that doesn't know how to help autistic people. And I am autistic so I relate to it more. That's just a me situation.

I am so invested in where Arin's story goes from here. Evil or not.

So yeah, the season was good, but didn't completely live up to the insane hype, which, to be fair, is a high bar.

UNTIL THE LAST FOUR EPISODES.

And then all of a sudden, I AM SHOCKED AND SHAKEN TO MY CORE.

These last four episodes are an absolute emotional roller coaster that left me shaking and screaming the whole time.

I actually SCREAMED at multiple occasions.

I actually screamed so many times watching this that I am now HOARSE.

THAT'S how hard it hit me.

The story goes from 0 to 100 the moment the Blood Moon shows up. Which was what the whole season was building up to. And it did NOT disappoint.

The race to try and protect Bonzle. The intense visions and paralysis Lloyd suffers from. Ras and the army coming back to the plot to be absolute powerhouses. The last episode of DREAD the entire time to desperately try to stop this ritual.

HUMAN SACRIFICES?! AM I WATCHING A KIDS SHOW RIGHT NOW?!?!

I was begging for Arin to succeed at getting Bonzle to safety, even though I knew he stood no chance against Ras. "Come on Arin! You got this!! YOU GOT THIS, SWEETIE!!"

And then Ras just goes to TOWN on the poor boy and taunts his utter failure, which HURTS SO BAD MAN.

The entire fight with the army, Cinder, and Ras. The destruction of the mechs which knocks them unconscious for a bit. Kai figuring out Rising Dragon again when his family gets put in danger. The way Nya avenges her brother afterwards.

When Bonzle was getting morphed back into spell form, BEGGING, I was begging too.

But they still do it!

And KAI?!?!

I couldn't even process what happened other than me screaming. From the moment Ras alluded to sacrificing Kai against his consent, I was screaming "NO. DON'T DO IT."

AND THEN THEY SACRIFICE HIM.

LIKE HOLY GOSH THIS FINALE DID NOT MESS AROUND.

I predicted a while back, in the first season actually, that Kai was gonna get sacrificed at some point. Who's laughing now? I DID NOT WANT TO BE RIGHT.

Like, usually in Ninjago the character would be willing to sacrifice themselves for the others. But here? This is without Kai's consent at all. Ras might as well have killed him right here.

It definitely felt that way with the way the others react and BEG for his safety. The way Nya avenges him.

And Kai giving up his shot at escape for the sake of his family? BRO. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

It hurts even more when you realize that when the Merge happened, Lloyd was ALONE thinking only he survived. He only gained hope again because of his reunion with Kai. His beloved surrogate brother!

AND NOW HE'S GONE.

NYA AND LLOYD LOST THEIR BROTHER.

WYLDFYRE LOST HER SURROGATE FATHER.

THEY THINK HE'S BASICALLY DEAD.

BRO. THAT'S SOUL CRUSHING.

And then Sora?! Why you gotta betray Arin like that?!

The most encouraging friend towards Arin, the person who held onto hope and praises for him the most, betrays that hope and doesn't trust him enough to get the winning blow himself. Then LIES about it.

GIRL. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!

That's going to be SO compelling once that gets outed. Like, morally, that was messed up and she was definitely in the wrong, BUT it led to the best possible outcome for them at the moment. They WON because she did NOT believe in Arin's abilities. Which only proves that the doubts about Arin's said abilities are correct.

And I have a gut feeling she's gonna learn Spinjitsu on top of that. And once that happens... double ouch.

Again, Evil Arin Theory.

I really hate to say it, but this reminds way too much of Arcane. If you know what I'm talking about.

I am totally imagining a situation similar to that in my head, that being a rescue mission for Kai, they decide to leave Arin out of it because of the lack of faith in him, he tags along anyway and he ruins their plan and Kai stays trapped there, Lloyd and Sora lash out on him for it, and before they can apologize they get thrusted back by something and Ras and Ras's master find Arin and take him in-

Again, I'll make a post about that.

The finale was by far the best part of this season. It has been a long time since Ninjago has made me HOARSE from being too invested.

That has not happened to me since Sons of Garmadon.

Because, yeah, I actually have NO IDEA where any of this is headed. How are they gonna save Kai and Bonzle? Why did some of Lloyd's visions not come true? What in the world is going on with Ras? Will the Administration help with that? Will the source dragons help with that?

What I probably do know is that Part 2 of this season is going to turn this into the best Ninjago Product since Tournament of Elements. Maybe even top it depending on my rewatches if my problems are still problems.

So... yeah. Good or Nah? Good. Obviously.

The hype is a little overblown to me, but it still deserves the hype.

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