#now this is pissing me off because why are you trying to guilt trip people for sharing a PUBLIC POLL

[will80sbyers]

again:

IF THE POLL IS PUBLIC FOR THE WHOLE FANDOM TO SHARE AROUND, PEOPLE VOTING IN IT IS NOT RIGGING ANYTHING.

It's how voting works.

Quit the weird ass takes about trying to guilt trip bylers for wanting to vote in the poll.

Also, one can make a post saying who are we voting next but people have to actually AGREE personally with that.

I did not vote Stonathan out and I did not vote Elmax out first because I alone in the end choose who I want to vote even if I see a post of a person here telling me who to vote.

If people have voted that it's because they agreed with that.

Now I'm gonna vote jopper out, does that mean I hate jopper????? NO!

The final rounds are about the ships we like less not the ship we hate, if people voted for Ronance or Elmax or even Rockie that personally is my favorite ship of the wlws it means that they did like them less than other ships, it doesn't mean that they hate them or are anti wlws or whatever weird idea is going around

no one is rigging anything.

Bylers are part of the stranger things fandom and have the right to partecipate and have the right to talk about the polls and decide what they want to vote for and if they want to make Byler win the polls it just means that we pay more attention and care to our ship than other people in the fandom!

That's how voting works, if you care you go and vote and you also talk to others about going to vote, if other people in the stranger things fandom are not doing that or simply don't care about voting they don't get to win!

#byler #will byers #mike wheeler #stranger things #now this is pissing me off because why are you trying to guilt trip people for sharing a PUBLIC POLL

[somewhereincairparavel]

Hazel and Jason's dynamic is SO fucking disappointing now that I'm binge reading the books again. It was so frosty and distant. Jason was literally just mistrusted and "not like what she expected him to be" in 90% of her Hoo POVS it's sad really. I really wish they would bonded properly. So much potential for friendship just down the drain.

Hazel's unwillingness to forgive Jason for suspecting Nico was genuinely pissing me off I'm sorry 😭 like I never thought I'd get mad at Hazel of all people bc she is literally a sweetie, but she's infantilized way too much in the fandom, so her flaws are easily overlooked, but like she literally went all volcano on Jason and held a grudge against him till House of Hades too? Like I get that she worried about her brother and stuff I'd be mad too. But it's the fact that she selectively forgave Leo SO quickly and never even yelled at him (even though he's the one who started the suspicion in the first place even jokingly called nico creepy and stuff behind his back not that I'm trying to fault him or anything I love him)

look I'm not saying it's all Leo's fault or anything, in my opinion, both Jason and Leo were right to suspect nico because of how back and forth nico went from both camps without saying a word and also pretended to not know percy and stuff. So it's realistically shady behaviour from their pov.

But Hazel gets all sweet and soft on Leo because of Sammy and forgives him in a heartbeat, tbh tho she never really directed her anger on Leo in the first place so there was nothing to forgive. But when Jason apologizes, she gets all cold and frosty like accepting his genuine apology is the hardest thing she has ever done?? Like?? Hazelnut I love you and all, but you just accused Jason of unfairly judging nico but you ironically unfairly judged Jason and went all sweetheart on Leo?? Contradiction much?? Either forgive both of them or don't forgive either of them? Why the bias?

Then in HoH she goes on a whole lot of yapping about how she doubts his capabilities as if she didnt just idolize him like 5 minutes ago RIGHT after he encouraged her that she was doing well and included her as a part of the team?? Idk, she was so petty with him and for what?. I just found it unfair that Jason considered hazel a friend but she didn't consider him one and just fully went all judgy mode on him for the rest of the series. she holds on an even bigger grudge than nico lol. she literally did anything but forgive him or give him a chance. so ooc.

Also, In TOA, I found out Hazel told Apollo that she talked to Jason's ghost after he died, to yell at him about how much his sacrifice had hurt Piper :/ like rlly? Out of all the things you could say to a person you idolized who made a lifechanging sacrifice, you guilt trip him for the sacrifice instead of gratitude? Ig she may have been raging out of grief or something but I honestly didn't like the way their dynamic ended. So incomplete. Just another reason of why I found fanon way better.

Hazel coming in terms with the fact that jason is a boy, and not a legend would've been sm better. since the seven basically signifies friendship and comfort. him being a boy with feelings is basically the whole point of his character, but it only gets acknowledged by nico and leo. hazel of all people would've understood jason's internal struggle, she has literally come back from the dead, if anyone knows about struggle, its her.

#I honestly hope y'all don't misunderstand this post as hazel slander or something. i love that pookie #but its time we acknowledge that she is flawed and is not an innocent bean who can do no wrong simply because she is infantilized #I am just super salty at how Jason had like no closeness to anyone but leo and nico #the amount of slandering this man had to endure from ppl. like the hazel raging at him was such an unnecessary addition. #Hazel and jason could've had a great heart to heart scene #pjo #pjo fandom #percy jackson #pjo hoo #jason grace #pjo hoo toa #pjo series #annabeth chase #piper mclean #leo valdez #hazel levesque #frank zhang

[anzulvr]

OMG YOUR WORKS ARE SO AWOOGA I CANT STOP 😭 can I request karma x reader too with a s/o that cries with a straight face and cries whenever they're seething in anger, if I tried to say smth while I'm sad then the straight face just dissolves into a mess 🤠 maybe a part where Karma makes them cry im both ways and another part someone in class makes them cry, ty if you can (> <)!!

Karma x Reader who cries out of Anger. Sorry for being late (again!!), Ily your typing is so fun😭 thank you for requesting!ASSASSINATION CLASSROOM SPOILERS ꒱

Karma is too straightforward, he makes insensitive jokes, he isn’t the most emotionally mature person and he can be pushier than most. So when you’re sitting beside him, holding back tears, he doesn’t know which one of his traits drove you to this point.

The worst part is you refuse to answer when he asks, instead opting for looking the other direction or giving him a scowled expression. He racked his brain, you guys went to school, were perfectly fine, came back and now you’re angry.

“[Name] why have you been mad at me all day? And don’t say you’re not, you keep a straight face whenever you are.”

He pries and pries until you finally blow up on him.

“So you can just throw yourself off a mountain for an assassination attempt without a second thought and expect me not to care?”

“I’m fine aren’t I? That was the best idea I could come up with, I don’t know how I could top it.” He says like he’s disappointed in the fact it failed.

“You don’t see the problem? Seriously?”

“If somebody doesn’t kill him, everyone is going to die- you’re gonna die, did you expect me to not try my ideas??”

“I didn’t expect you to try to off yourself in the process.”

“It’s not about my life it’s about yours, I’m not letting you die.”

“How am I supposed to live if you’re dead?!” Your voice only gets louder.

“How am I supposed to live if you die because I was too scared to try something?!” Karma replies matching your tone.

“Tell me you won’t try anything like that again.”

He looks at the floor not wanting to face you.

You press further “If you die over this, I’ll die with you.”

The tears stream down your face, you do your best to keep your blank expression.

He can’t be the reason you get hurt, he knows you know that much. “It won’t come to that, we’ll assassinate him together.”

୨୧

If the reason for your tears is someone else the way Karma reacts is a unique depending on the person.

If Teraska makes you cry Karma going to instigate until Terasaka gets pissed off enough to fight him.

“Making [Name] cry? No wonder you’ve gotten rejected by every girl you’ve shown interest in.”

“Ya don’t know anything- stop shoving your head in other peoples business.”

“[Names] business is mine too, if you don’t like that you can fight me over it.”

“Tch..” Terasaka looks away in annoyance

“What? You scared?” Karma isn’t giving up until Terasaka throws a punch and looses.

If Maehara and Okajima are the culprits, Karmas exposing their embarrassing secrets to the class.

“I know you two aren’t the brightest… but I’d think you’d know not to bother [Name].”

Unlike Terasaka they’re not willing to take their chances against Karma, they know it’s too late making you cry is a death wish.

“Hear us out- we weren’t trying to offend anyone we just-”

Karma doesn’t let them finish their sentence before he says “You know what I think is so funny, I found this crazy video of you guys.”

“Wait huh?”

“It’s not loading right now, I’ll post it on my story later so you two know what I’m talking about!”

“Please don’t! What even is it?!”

It’s a video of the time they tried a contemporary dance class to impress some girls and ended up tripping on each other and fighting, they kept slipping with every punch, needless to say they’re prohibited from going back.

If Korosenseis work load is what’s making you upset he’s going to guilt trip him until he agrees to excuse your assignments, “You call yourself a teacher? Poor [Name] is stressed out and you don’t care.”

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to pressure anyone that’s the opposite of what I want to do!! [Name] I’ll give you an extension.”

“Just an extension after what you did? [Name] is humiliated after crying infront of everyone and that’s the solution?”

“It wasn’t that bad…” You felt better and you tried talking yourself out of it but he kept going.

“I say you excuse the assignment and let [name] rest. You’re so cruel… making your student hate school.” He knows exactly where to hit, Korosensei is sensitive enough to make that easy, he would never forgive himself if he burnt out his students.

“Okay [Name] you’re excused for the project. Please, forgive me!” Korosensei is the one crying now, but at least you don’t have to worry about the assignment anymore. The rest of the class starts complaining about it too in hopes to get it excused themselves.

#karma x reader #karma akabane x reader #akabane x reader #akabane karma #ansatsu kyoushitsu x reader #reader x karma #karma akabane #karma akabane x you #korosensei #eclass #assasination classroom #akabane karma x reader #assassination classroom x reader #assassination classroom

[austinsastrology8991]

> How to Turn your Mars On < Why Mars ain't working for you and why you getting Gecked around> Lost yo tail ya fkn lizard <

Mars is Fighting > and i notice some people could use adjustments in their kung fu jitsu

1 > Never surrender. If you surrender, you just told the other person you don't believe in what you are doing or saying. this then makes them believe you are someone easy to fight. If you want to be seen as someone who knows the art of fighting. You only fight when you are prepared to fight. 2 > Everything and Anything is a weapon. Do not let people guilt trip you, do not let people call you out. If you want to call someone out its easy as fuck to do because everyone has a few flaws and that are stapled on their faces. So if someone insults you. You can very easily insult them back. Its easy to make fun of others, and if someone makes fun of you. Its their turn 👹 3 > Everyone chooses their fights very carefully because they are insecure of not coming off strong with this in mind. If someone is willing to fight you, you must at least be aware that they fully believe they will win. If they didn't believe it, they wouldnt try it. Now let me point out that this philosophy. Is some bitch shit. You are all setting the difficulty of your game boys to easy, because you only show others your teeth when it suits you. Sometimes you will be forced to fight in situations where you cannot win. And since you've been practising life on 'easy' you are an easy kill. 4 > Fight someone good at fighting. I notice everyone likes to kill the easy kill, but everyone usually shuts the fuck up when someone notorious walks in the room. And this is all a miserable display of ego isn't it. 5 > You can never tell who is and who isn't good at fighting. Many people keep to themselves and some people are very loud and obnoxious, and they are thought to be intimidating, but I shit you not if you step on them a little bit, they will react very quickly. and far too often there is a reason the quiet one is quiet. They may be afraid of fighting. But question why they are afraid of fighting? If someone is afraid. You must realize there is a reason to be afraid. And if they show you what they saw (its not too hard to mimic) you will realize the quiet one. is always. the darkest. Quiet is displayed in many ways, quiet. is not revealing. Those who reveal. Are revealing because they are not afraid. Quiet is unrevealing. Quiet is afraid. And with a simple change in mindset the quiet one knows how to truly inspire fear. Which today seems to be the only way to fight. Have you seen anyone knocking each other out? Jail is a pretty effective incentive to stop each other from entering physical altercations. Oh and the worst part about this set up? Jail is full of physical displays of dominance. But we are afraid of doing so irl. LOL so we are all fucked if we go to jail I suppose ;p 6 > What is the price of winning? Winning requires you to be humble. No one cares for an arrogant winner. When you win it far too often feels bitter sweet because everyone else is caught up in giving you bullshit flattery, and the other half is so bitter they are biting their tongues. Do not regret losing, its honestly burden relieving. Winning should not be taken for granted nor congratulated because you stole someones happyness "Hey its okay buddy :D" type shit will piss anyone off lmao. 7 > Modern warfare is disgusting. We are mental abusers but not physical abusers. most of us restrain ourselves. We just unleash our rage through our minds because thats what society demands (some use emotions but that is a whole nother topic initself). And well with this in mind. The winner is usually the one who gave the other person the biggest reality check. And its sad. who won really? no one ever does. we just sharpened each others insult sword. kinda sad reality right :/ hey at least no one died. but we are killing their souls :D good job everybody now cmon lets insult each other like internet trolls :D

8 > Do you even know what you want? What do you even want to gain. Is the other person going to change their mind. are you looking for an apology? really assess what you want when you fight or pursue something. because far too often I notice people are pretty goalless and have not much reason to fight. So they just fight when someone steps on their little toes. Like someone pointing out the flaws in something personal always gets defensive. But ask yourself why you being defensive? Like they are probably right. We all have our reasons to live, but that comes with flaws that are stigmatized by each of our own little society's ways of conforming. Usually you are triggered by a wound, as you know how it feels to be cut their, the scar reopens. And your afraid of feeling fear. But if you show someone your not afraid of something that once scared you. Well you learned the art of war my fren 9 > Mars requires fearlessness. If we still fought each other today. with swords and shit. Would you withhold your strike? Or would you strike their weak points? Ofc this is a matter of life and death so you will kill them. But most of you dont realize their is an energy here. And the more you surrender to others whims. The more you gave others victory over you. And this causes a stifling energy of insecurity, and lack of strength / belief. So if you want to fight for something. You fight to the death. Unless you dont bvelieve in it. Then you should not be fighting. Everyone must fight for something. Nothing is more enthralling then fighting and finding something worth fighting for.

#astro community #astrology blog #astrology notes #astrology

[t4transsexual]

have you ever dated cis women? when did you decide to be t4t?

i have dated a couple of cis women, one for a little while and we didnt get on because she was one of those fems who doesnt want their butch/masc/transmasc partner to have feelings and needs and also didnt want me to say no to sex and we didnt last long because i was deeply unhappy with her

as for when i decided to be t4t, i guess its probably about time i open up about the specific instance(s) that lead to me deciding to be exclusively t4t, because i havent actually talked about what pushed me to make the shift into exclusively dating trans people. i was trying to run a more positive page and frankly i wasnt really ready to talk about this so publicly, especially with the terf/transphobe interaction i get almost all the time on this account, but i figure i can now and ill probably turn off replies if i can figure out how

tw for graphic description of sexual assault and transphobia under the cut

when i started medically transitioning, i decided to try dating guys again. keep in mind i had a lot of comphet before deciding i was t4t; i basically only really beat that around 2022 when i turned 20. and i matched with a cis guy on tinder, who looked like he had a lot of personality judging by his photos i was 18, almost 19 at the time

literally the first thing this man says to me, after i tell him im trans, is "oh, cool, i love femboys." red flag #1. i said, "im not a femboy, i present masculinely, dont call me that." he apologized, and we moved on

at some point, we're talking about sex. he says hes very subby and a size queen. all fine, i told him i was a stone top/dom, i didnt really like experiencing penetration and it was painful for me due to a condition i had at the time. he says thats fine, everythings good. this will be important later

later, he tells me he told his parents i was trans. i asked him why, given that he both didnt ask me first and said his parents were transphobic. he says "my mom asked, was i just supposed to lie?" i say, yes. he apologizes, i /really/ want to call the whole thing off at this point but he seemed nice enough that maybe he just didnt know trans dating as well as i did

the entire relationship, he just says transphobic shit. he told me that he "understood why people didnt want to date trans people, because its a lot of baggage." he was an active alcoholic by the way. and also dating a trans person. he would neg me for being trans and then turn around and say that i was such a hot guy. he even misgendered me one time, and got upset at me for getting pissed about it, and made me believe i was overreacting. he made me believe that he was doing me a favor by ever dating me

at some point, we're at my parents house, and he tells me he wants to fuck me with his penis. i tell him no, that i dont want to, that i dont know about it, that im scared, pretty much anything i can say to get him to reconsider, but he argued and said itd be good for me and that i can choose which hole but it became very clear to me that i had no choice. so i said he could fuck my pussy

it was excruciating. it hurt so bad, but i knew i couldnt say no. he couldnt stay hard unless he was degrading me and i didnt want him to, so he kept making me jerk him off so he could keep raping me

eventually he stopped, and i wasnt even really aware i had been raped at first. ive been sexually abused by several people in my life and generally it has taken me a while to accept when ive been sexually abused by a person. so we kept dating like normal, long distance btw, but my mental health was deteriorating. i was suicidal for the first time in a while. i was self harming again. i couldnt stop thinking about killing myself.

eventually, he breaks up with me for being suicidal. he says im guilt tripping him or something, i dont remember. and that was december of 2021

we go no contact. i still dont realize he raped me. but i knew that there was something deeply wrong in the way our relationship was

right after him, i dated a trans woman who we went to the same high school. just the difference in how i was treated by her than by him, with her she treated me like i was an actual equal in the relationship. with him, he felt he was superior to me; like he "owned" me, or something

we broke up, we werent really compatible, but when i got with her, she taught me what being t4t was, and the implicit understanding and the comfort and safety i felt. after we broke up was when i decided i didnt like men, and still remained t4t after

i realized what he did to me was rape nearly a year later. he correctively raped me for being a stone top, more specifically, and i dont think he wouldve been "empowered" to rape me if i was a cis man, or even a cis woman. i understand that the "off" feeling i felt throughout that relationship was because he, as a cis person, felt superior over me as a trans person, and felt that if he wanted to fuck me, i shouldnt get a say. he talked about doing other actions to me that i didnt want done at the time, certainly not by him, and if we werent long distance, he probably wouldve raped me several more times

being with my current girlfriend, we click in a way that i havent felt with any cis person, the women included. she definitely isnt going to rape me for being trans. ive undergone physical therapy so that if i ever got raped again, it wouldnt hurt as bad, and it worked and ive actually enjoyed bottoming (consensually) with my girlfriend. she makes me feel very safe, and we understand each other and each others needs as trans people very well, and being with her has helped me process the time i was raped, and the several other times ive been sexually abused by other people

now that ive had time to process these things, i would say that i dont feel the same way around trans people (including me) dating cis people anymore. when i first started this account, i wouldve never admitted this then btw, i fully did not think trans people should date cis people, because i had fostered such a deep distrust of cis people as a result of that whole relationship and assault. i believed cis people would always be bad partners to trans people, but i dont believe that anymore. in the very unlikely circumstance i find myself single again, i may even consider dating a cis woman again. but probably not, because ive grown to really like the implicit understanding that we as trans people get with other trans people

thats why im t4t, and when i became t4t was around the beginning of 2022

#shoutout to my girlfriend for putting up with whats left of me #even though she says its not something she 'puts up with' because she loves me #trans #t4t #transhet #transmasc #t4t mlw #st4t #trans man #transgender #also had someone who said i was 'missing the point' of being t4t one time #like earlier this year #took all i had to not be like #'nope. i got it'

[memories-beneath-the-skin]

Dad was cheap

Like not funny ha ha cheap.. Like he was, but also wtf infuriating cheap

He would tithe to the church all he felt he should, I mean litterally every few months, they would post in a special bulletin who gave and how much total. Dick measuring to guilt others if I ever saw it. That's the only time I'd hope he had been cheap but no...

He was an LPN, almost RN but he decided not, back in the 70s was a different outlook of those peeps and roles in industry.

I saw his pay stubs after he died when cleaning out his shed.... Naturally that's where they go. I couldn't believe how little he made, so I get frugal, I get I got second hand clothes a huge percentage of time and those handed down to my brother, but he always provided.

Mom didn't work until we were out of the house. Raising two boys and I can tell stories... She SHOULD have been paid... She mentally survived though, I guess you do.

His cheapness didn't affect basic to intermediate auto repairs, my dad had everything done at a shop, I grew up craving to do it, oil/coolant /brake /transmission fluid changing, doing my own brakes, shocks, suspension, most top engine parts, diagnosing electrical and physical gremlins. I still do, not out of necessity but because I enjoy it.

Hurt when I told dad I would do his brakes, he never had me, I would just charge parts, I know where to buy them, just like oil, I can buy great quality brake parts for both axles and come in well under what a shop does mediocre for one axle in price, and they don't treat your car like it's theirs, the tactics in which one needs to remove parts at times with violence I am well versed, as well as taking the time to do it right and careful gets cut sometimes, but I respect it was his choice.

The most cheap thing he did and it pissed me off one time and I finally got him to understand was tipping. Ten dollar meal, 80 cents, 50 dollar meal a few dollars. Now I will say it's up to everyone to tip how they want, and I do agree tipping for things now in some respects are out of control, but I started out as a puppy in the service industry, and while I didn't need to earn tips, I ran the kitchen and interacted directly with those that did and my performance could fuck them from tips and so I made sure I cooked and plated like every meal made was mine.

We were up in Canada, stopped at some strip mall diner, ordered burgers, my dad thought his was not done quite enough, but otherwise everything was fine, we were trying to get to upstate NY to bury my grandmother, his mom and I get maybe he was under duress, but I was too, I was doing all the driving because I love to drive but still it's very long and need to focus too much, people are assholes when you take a nap for a bit driving for some reason, like jeez I get it🤣

I watched my dad get the bill, easiest was to pay with card, and not screw with the did different currencies.

I noticed be put a dash on the tip, just wrote the total on the bottom. Now if it's a place you get your food and no service after I get maybe adjusting.

We got multiple how are things? I had 3 Coca-Colas, he had mutiple cups of coffee, a napkin run.... So.... Was not like the server that ran his card and looked defeated as she watched him sign it deserved it.

We get out side, he's opening door, I stand at curb.

Me : dad wtf was that?

Dad :was what?

Me: why the fuck did you stiff the server

Dad: the burger wasn't that good

Me: so?

Dad: was expensive too

Me: no dad it wasn't, it's in their currency, it's same we pay

Dad: ok, well next time...

Me: next time what? Next time we go here? Have her as a server? Or eat again??

Dad: next time we eat

Me: well we are here now

Dad : we have a schedule

Me: the hell we do, so skip a rest stop if we have to, you know we are arriving over three days before she's buried, don't give me this schedule crap, we stop when we want, and don't push our trips

Dad: what do you want me to do

Me : go in there, tip her, tell her you're an ass or that you forgot, I don't care

Dad: next time

Me :did she do anything wrong with service

Dad :the burger was...

Me: no, not her sorry, go bitch to a manager or call the prime minister or something, that was the cook...

Dad : well my coffee mug had something on it

Me: ok.. Hey excuse me miss, can you flog the dishwasher or please get me another mug, somehow this one isn't clean...

Dad: ok! (opens up wallet) all I have is a 10 and hundreds, I will get change next stop....

Me: and drive back and tip her?

Dad : that's absurd

Me: (opening up my wallet) well I only have 20s, that's fine, but if you make me be the one to walk in and do it I am walking away

Dad : son you won't walk off

Me: yes, we both paid our own meals, I tipped her very well for mine, I am good walking to grandma's, not like if I don't make it she would know

Dad : you don't have the money...

Me : don't care I'll sell my body to science or give handjobs, but riding with you that can't understand the principle of the structure and your issues are mechanisms to justify not spending more than the tab, I have watched you for years, you get up from table and mom ends up digging money out of purse and laying tip at the table.

Dad : she doesn't...

Me :the fuck she don't, call her. She just laughs and says... That's your father... I'm not laughing

Dad : (walks into restaurant hands woman the 10 and she smiles)

*walking back to car*

Me: dad I know I was a dick, and I love you, but you irk me

Dad : I know, your mother got mad last week over same thing

Me: good

Dad: besides I need you to ride with me, no one wants your calloused hands giving hand jobs

*laughter *

He got better as he aged, helped I think to have kids move out of house, mom started working a bit after we moved out and food bill fell 🤣, he would ask me and mom what would be a good tip for the meal and service, for years he tried to wrap his mind around how I tipped, service not based on tab. Eat at a diner, server runs their ass off for you, 25 dollar tab, verses same effort from high end restaurant and they should get more? No... So I tip high compared to low tabs and normal for high, dad never understood how for a 12 dollar meal, I'd give 10 tip, not about the price to me.

As he aged he started to throw his money around more, but still had moments.

I remember the car accident, one I wrote about a while back, just out of Sudbury, Canada

Flipped the car, destroyed the vehicle, the car top carrier, the only time we brought our bikes to grandmas the were hanging off the back and trashed, mom had a concussion, Justin had a broken collar bone, so much lost and broken and he said... I just filled up the tank 20 miles back... Dang it should have waited.

#writers on tumblr #spilled thoughts #spilled ink #dad things #personal

[bellysoupset]

just popping in to share a little scenario i’ve been thinking about! leo is jonah’s plus-one at some sort of medical community event he didn’t really want to go to, but that he agreed to anyway because he didn’t want to disappoint jonah. they’ve been arguing since they got in the car though, and jonah is fed up because he wishes leo would just be direct and tell him what he thinks instead of tip-toeing around his feelings. so jonah has left leo to sulk in a corner by himself while he goes off and at least tries to enjoy his evening.

eventually, leo finds a little balcony so he can get away from the crowd and the noise and just as he’s taking some deep breaths and starting to relax, wendy stumbles through the door. she doesn’t seem to notice him at first, she stands by the railing, staring out at some indeterminate point in space. she’s just escaped a conversation with an old acquaintance of her parents who, perhaps out of obviousness, perhaps not, just deadnamed her in front of a classmate.

but if leo was irritated before, now he’s fuming. he doesn’t care to notice the pallor of her face or the shakiness of her hands. he tells her to piss off and only realizes something is wrong when her gaze snaps to him and he can see tears in her eyes. she gulps and nods and practically flees back the way she came, at which point, leo, who is more shocked by the lack of a barbed response than by the tears, swallows his pride and goes after her to make sure she’s okay.

This ask is so amazing, I had to answer it immediately. I hope the fic made any justice!

---------------------------

"You don't have to come, I can just take Wendy as my date," Jonah said through his teeth as if he didn't know this was exactly the last thing Leo wanted to hear. As if Leo didn't know he was trying to get under his skin. As if it wasn't working.

"I don't get why you need a fucking date", Leo scoffed, getting up from the bed and marching to their closet. Most of his suits were cheap and just for work, so he dug through the blazer jackets until he found the singular only fancy one he owned and threw it on top of the bed, crouching for a tie, "can't you just go alone? Like a regular person?"

Jonah didn't answer him at all, unbothered by the tantrum and continued to button up his shirt in front of the body length mirror he had on his side of the closet.

"We have to leave in thirty minutes," Jonah said, at last, walking out of the closet. Leo stared at his back, wishing he could burn holes there. It was so unfair.

He had plans for tonight that did not involve sipping champagne and standing awkwardly in the corner like a lost puppy all night. Leo had just downloaded Chicago and he had actually been looking forward to Jonah being gone for the night, since he hated musicals, but nooo.....

By the time he walked out of their shared suite, clad in the fancy tux and clean shaven, Leo's mood was positively spoiled. He couldn't muster up a single smile, not that Jonah minded all that much, because he didn't look happy either.

"It's going to be just three hours, Leo," Jon rolled his eyes as they walked through the parking lot, "and it's for a good cause."

"Don't even try to guilt trip me with the fact it's a charity ball," Leo scoffed, "I wasn't invited to no charity ball nor will I be making any donations. Besides, I don't see why do you need a date to this event."

"Because I do have a boyfriend," Jonah answered sharply, entering the driver's seat, "despite what everyone thinks since my boyfriend is an antisocial prick, I do have one. It won't kill you."

"Watching Chicago wouldn't kill you either," Leo glared at the side of his head and Jonah rolled his eyes.

"Renee Zellweger cannot sing and you know it," Jon snapped back without looking at him, "just try to have some fun and talk with people."

"I talk with people all day, every day," Leo rolled his eyes, only for Jonah to stop briskly on the first red light that was just around the corner of their building.

"Fine!" Jonah exclaimed, putting the car in reverse, despite the fact that wasn't allowed in that street, "Fine! Stay home then! When people continue to gossip about me being single, then you don't get to complain to me about-"

"FINE!" Leo shouted back just as loud, crossing his arms, "I'll go to your stupid charity ball to act as a show pony you can parade around, just drive already!"

Jon huffed, mumbling something under his breath that sounded a lot like more like a mule, but Leo chose to ignore it, before their fight went from "annoyed" to "break up" territory.

Leo couldn't force up a smile, it didn't matter how much he tried and he was trying. It wasn't a bad party, it was better than most of the formal events Jonah had dragged him to, but it was still... Boring. Just boring.

It was out of their medium sized town and in the nearest metropolis, so it took an hour and twenty to get to the jockey club where it was being held. An hour and twenty minutes that Leo spent looking out of his window and fighting the queasiness that was starting to creep up on him from the carsickness.

His head was aching by the time they entered the club, but the nausea got shoved aside by the champagne.

"Not so bad, see?" Jonah said and his voice, despite sounding pretty friendly, still had that petty edge that Leo hated. When he knew he wanted to pick a fight.

"It's fine," he said through his teeth, then scowled even more as he saw a familiar silhouette ahead.

Wendy was arm in arm with Vince, smiling broadly as she talked with an elderly couple. She saw them before Leo could turn around and move along, waving for them to come closer.

"Hi!" She smiled, taking Jon's arm and tiptoeing to kiss him on the cheek, "you look great. Hi Leo."

"Hi," he measured her up and down, unable to stop the jealousy from burning his stomach as Jon's upset frown immediately shifted into a large genuine smile. This cheap Swan Lake Barbie cosplayer always got in between them.

"Hello?" Said Vince, poking him, a charming smile on, "good evening to you too."

"Hi man," Leo forced a yellow smile, still watching as Wendy introduced Jon to the elder couple between them. Both doctors, from Pennsylvania.

"How do did you meet Wendy?" Jonah asked, all flashy smiles and the wrinkly little woman before him started to talk about meeting Wendy during her undergrad program in UPenn.

Leo barely restrained an eyeroll. He had no wish to sit around and hear as some stranger sung praises on little miss legacy admission. Instead he zeroed a waiter across the room and hastily excused himself.

The party was overwhelming. Clearly they had underestimated the turn out of people, because the place was packed full and Leo was starting to feel more than a little overwhelmed. Not only he was annoyed to be there, but with all those people, the loud music, the dimmed lights... He needed some fresh air.

It took him a moment to locate a balcony and Leo rushed out of the ballroom, leaning over it and tugging at his tie, taking deep measured breaths. He was unsure if he was trying to control his panic or his anger, either way it was working. Or maybe that was the second flute of champagne that was quickly getting to his head.

He undid his tie completely, rolling it and stuffing it in his pocket, undoing the first button of his shirt and then reached for his still full third champagne glass.

It was like a balm to his temper and Leo sighed in relief, sipping the cold liquid and looking out to the racing tracks of the jockey club. They had turned most of the lights out, so it was just a very long field of darkness, with a few pops of garden lights appearing.

Vaguely Leo thought this would be a very pretty place to visit during the day. Jonah probably liked horse racing, he was competitive and snobby, the sport fitted right in. He snorted at the thought, turning around to face the ball room.

He couldn't spot Jon among the crow or even Vince. This was a badly organized party, Leo thought, swishing the champagne in his glass and then letting out a loud groan as Wendy walked through the french doors.

She ignored his loud, exaggerated groan, bracing against the stone rail of the balcony, hands tugging at the roots of her wavy hair and Leo rolled his eyes at her.

"Bet one of your extracurriculars was drama club," he said, studying her from the corner of his eye, "really, there are a thousand fucking balconies here, leave me the hell alone. I'm not in the mood for you tonight."

Only then did he actually get a good look of her face, since a person who was blocking the main lamp leading to the balcony moved and yellow light spilled through the glass doors. She was really pale, hazel eyes brimming with tears.

"Are you c-"

"Ye-yeah, sorry," she choked up, turning back around and entering the party once more, practically fleeing from him. Leo's eyebrows shot up and he felt a wave of queasiness wash over him. He might hate Wendy, but he was not a dick. He had no wish to make her cry in the middle of a party or to kick her while she was down. He doubted his two snappy lines had been the culprit of such a reaction, but that didn't make him feel any better.

"Wendy, wait!" Leo shouted, leaving his champagne on the railing and rushing back inside, in hopes of catching up with her to apologize. For a woman in heels she actually ran quite fast. He didn't manage to catch up, always five feet behind the trail of her pink dress and despite the fact Leo was calling her name, she either didn't hear or refused to answer him.

"Wendy, please, stop running," Leo exclaimed, almost managing to catch up, but only because she froze in her heels and turned around.

He caught a glimpse of her face before Wendy was elbowing her way through people: she was openly crying now. Actual tears, her heart shaped face all red, mascara smearing. In the middle of a charity ball.

"Shit," Leo sighed, pushing his way through in order to grab her wrist, "Wendy, WENDY-"

"Hey!" Jonah's voice was naturally louder than his, more happy too. It was not directed at Leo, he was standing in front of Wendy and Leo immediately felt his heart plummet down to his stomach since he knew exactly how the scene looked like: Wendy crying copiously in the middle of a party while Leo chased after her, with a frown on. This looked great.

"Jon, this is not-"

Wendy's shoulders hitched with a sob, once, twice and then she said in a small, broken voice, "ex-excuse me-" pushing Jonah's chest out of the way as she stalked to the ladies room right ahead.

Jon was so shocked that he was easy to push, only snapping back into his senses as Wendy was already entering the bathroom. Jonah's hazel eyes were large, confused, and then his brows dipped into a furious frown as he took in Leo standing right there.

"You did not just make her sob in the middle of a party," he said coldly.

Leo shook his head, nervous, "I didn't! I didn't, I- I didn't do anything, I just-"

"What did you say to her!?"

For the first time since probably ever Leo saw what other people saw when they said Jon was scary. He took a step back, fighting the urge to shrink into himself.

"I didn't say anything!"

"Then why the fuck is she sobbing?!" Jonah leaned in, hissing the question since people were starting to stare at them. People such as Vince, who stepped closer with an uneasy, confused smile on.

"Guys...? Everything alright? You're causing a little bit of a sce-"

"Tell him," Jonah scoffed, crossing his arms, "go on. Tell him."

Leo gulped down, his own eyes burning, throat closing up, "I didn't mean- I didn't-"

Vince's confused smile slipped down and he glanced from Leo to Jon, then back to Leo, "what happened?" although his voice was much calmer than Jonah's, Leo felt even more panicked if that was possible. Jonah was pissed, but Vin? Vince would be heartbroken.

"I swear I didn't mean to make her cry," he said, words thick with the tears he was holding back, "I didn't even say anything, I just told her to get away-"

"Where is she?" Vince's voice was measured, his jaw tense, shoulders squared. Jonah pointed the bathroom, but didn't look at it or Vin, still glaring daggers at Leo.

"I'm going home," he said and the "I'm" instead of "we're" was enough to make Leo feel nauseous. Was he getting broken up with in the middle of a charity ball with everyone looking?

Jonah pushed past him, while Vince entered the women's bathroom, little squeals be damned, and Leo was left in the middle of the crowd, unsure of what to do.

He turned on his heels and followed Jon out, not to argue, only because he needed to get out of that place and he needed to reason with him.

Jon didn't look over his shoulder once, power walking through the parking lot towards his car. Leo's hands wouldn't stop sweating and he rushed to catch up.

"Jon," he grabbed his boyfriend's sleeve, "babe, c'mon, let me explain-" his stomach hurt when Jonah jerked away from him. He stopped next to the car, finally turning to look at him.

Leo could feel his tux jacket sticking to his back, "please let me explain... Please, Jon."

Jonah didn't say anything, only raised one single judgmental eyebrow and waited.

"I didn't say anything, I swear. I- She came outside and-" his stomach churned and Leo gulped against the nausea and panic, "and I told her to go away, but that- That-" he couldn't breathe. Leo attempted to suck in a breath, but the air felt like he went in through the wrong pipe, because immediately he was coughing, bracing against his knees as the champagne jumped up to his mouth and splashed between his shoes. Leo whimpered, head hanging, feeling thoroughly and utterly humiliated, "Jon..."

"You're a mess," Jonah scoffed, opening the passenger side of the car and holding the door open, "sit down."

He still sounded beyond furious, but at least he cared enough to do that. Leo groaned, staggering to the car and sitting down, still with his legs out of the car. He rested his elbows on his knees and his head on his hands and let out a sigh, before the tears sprung forth.

"I'msorry," Leo slurred, sniffling grossly and shaking his head, "I swear I didn't mean to make her cry and- And I was try-trying to apologize, I- Don't break up-"

"I'm not breaking up with you," Jonah cut him off sharply, glaring at him still, "and you are apologizing to Wendy."

Leo nodded, angrily trying to wipe the tears and failing when a new batch came forward as he thought of Vince's disappointed face, "I didn't want to hurt her."

Jon snorted, without a hint of humor, "yeah, right."

"I didn't!" Leo exclaimed, glaring at him, "she was already crying when I told her to go away!"

Jonah squinted at him, studying him for a long minute then his shoulders dropped, "she was?"

"YES!" Leo yelled back, his emotions getting best of him. He wiped his nose on his sleeve, "I don't know what happened!"

Jonah seemed to be working over this, mulling the words for a second... Then his jaw locked and he pointed at Leo, "wait here," he turned on his heel, walking back inside the party.

Leo let out a sigh, hanging his head and spitting in the gravel, trying to rid himself of the awful taste of bad alcohol. His head was throbbing, but the knot in his chest was easing up slightly. Jonah had no intention to break up with him and he believed him, even if he was still furious.

Leo rubbed at his eye, breathing in and letting it out in a measured manner, forcing his heart to stop trying to void via his mouth. There was a water bottle resting in the cup holder and Leo grabbed it, swishing the lukewarm water around in his mouth and spitting it out.

He needed to get himself together. Probably go after Jon and find Wendy and Vin, apologize properly...

Leo's head snapped up as he heard a commotion inside. There was a sudden influx of people out of the double doors and Leo stood up, shutting the car door and peering around the parking lot, towards the double doors that led to the jockey's ballroom.

This was... not good.

He completely forgot the fact his face was splotchy with tears and his mouth tasted like vomit, rushing back inside and trying to elbow his way through the people, that seemed more tightly knit together than before... Louder too.

"Stop it! I said STOP!" Wendy's voice cut through the noise and Leo finally managed to shove his head between two people, in time to see Jonah receive a punch straight to his jaw by some random stranger and Vince knock the guy out in one simple punch.

The man spun on his heel with Vince's punch and then stumbled, grabbing on a lady's shawl before falling down, joining a second guy on the ground.

"JoNAH!?" Leo exclaimed, managing to push past the people. Jon looked up, his nose was bleeding and he had burst his lip, but the murderous look from before had vanished.

"That's it, everyone here is going to the station!" a much older man yelled and the security guards approached them. Leo was beyond lost as he watched Vince and Jon sit down obediently, joining the two unconscious dudes, while the party emptied out.

It took almost an hour for him to get the full scope of the situation. Wendy's tears hadn't been because of him at all, but because the two unconscious dickheads were old acquaintances of hers from UPenn and had openly harassed her, using her deadname. Leo had only been salt to the wound.

She was in shambles, but still her voice was firm enough as she pulled the director of the Trans Youth Charity to the side and threatened to make very public what two of his donors had called her, if he insisted on pressing charges for public disruption and assault.

It was almost 1 AM by the time all four of them stumbled to the empty parking lot. Jonah nursing an ice block wrapped in a napkin to his mouth, Wendy's shoulders still shaking with silent, dry sobs.

"Get in," Leo sighed, holding the passenger door open, the irony not lost on him, "you're a mess."

It wasn't lost on Jon either, because he let out a little chuckle, before wincing when it pulled on his split lip, "Leo-"

"I don't wanna hear it," he slammed the passenger door closed, shutting Jon in and then turned around, to face Vince and Wendy, "you guys are going to be okay?"

Vince smiled, Wendy firmly wrapped in his arms and pressed to him as if he could and would fight anyone who dared step closer to her, "we're alright, kid... I'm sorry for earlier."

"You didn't do anything I wouldn't have done," Leo shrugged, then looked at Wendy, "I'm sorry."

She nodded, opening a tight smile, but didn't reply at all and Leo figured it was the best he was getting after being the final straw that caused the whole mess.

He circled the car and got in the driver's side, shutting the door and leaning in, resting his forehead to the steering wheel.

"Leo-"

"I already know," Leo sighed, pressing his forehead in with more force, "you're sorry, you jumped the gun."

"Yeah, I did. Badly..." Jonah sounded embarrassed, "I shouldn't-"

"I know," Leo interrupted him again, "did you at least knock out the first one?"

There was a surprised chuckle and then a timid, "yeah...?"

"Good," he sat up straight, pushing his hair back, "we're gonna call it even tonight. I made your best friend cry, you yelled at me and almost got us both arrested."

"Sounds pretty fucking uneven," Jonah said and Leo rolled his eyes, glaring at him.

"Do you want me to be pissed at you?" he said calmly, "because I'm too tired to do that. My head is killing me from all the crying."

Jon looked guilty, shaking his head, "I don't - You know I love her, right? Like, I truly do, she's the closest thing I have to a sister."

"You have a sister," Leo pointed out, but it was empty and bitter. He knew Jon's relationship with his ten year old sister whom he saw once a year didn't compare to what lied between him and Wendy, "I know, Jon," the blonde sighed, "... And I'm not saying I understand, okay? Or that I'm not jealous-"

"You don't have to be jealous, Leo. It's differ-"

"But I get why you acted the way you did tonight," Leo continued, ignoring Jon's reassurances, "now can we please go home? I want my bed and my cat."

"And your boyfriend...?" Jonah said timidly and Leo rolled his eyes.

"No," he shook his head, starting the car, "you can take the couch. In fact, you can take the couch the rest of the week."

(Read part 2 here)

#mywriting #sickfic #leo wagner #wendy marshall #crying #angst

[goldenspecter]

Hey everyone, this is serious talk time. 

I don’t write call-out posts, I’ve helped and added on to my fair share of them, but never have I expected to write one of my own. But here we are, in this day and age and I’m writing a callout post. Let me make clear and upfront as to why I’m writing this callout post:

My partner @dakotafinely has been bullied, harassed, and stalked by one single person, @b-tchidowhatiwant and his other previous accounts, for over a year. It has finally reached its breaking point. 

Allow me to lay out the evidence, lay the groundwork, and pave the way so you all can understand why this guy is dangerous and should not be in this fandom. Please reblog so people can know how dangerous he is.

This started in March 2021 with this ask. This ask is dated March 28, 2021. This response my partner has given him has established several things: 

This is repeated behavior. 

There is a pattern that this guy did: follower appreciation->hate ask->deletion(ignoring of ask initially)

This has been an ongoing behavior. 

Then there was this ask, a day later on March 29th:

This ask, dated March 29th, 2021, also establishes a repeated behavior we’ll be seeing crop up time and time again: Misogyny. 

Despite submitted asks there are many that were deleted or that were not posted. The following consists of a few amount of these unposted asks made by the same person. The dates of these unposted messages are November 24th, 2021, and March 3rd, 2022.

This user has also continued their harassment outside of anon hate and messages through posts on their various Tumblr accounts that have proven to be connected to the same individual. All of these had been reported and blocked repeatedly by both me and @fluidfox123. Below is a list of links where this user has been called out on for their meanspirited behavior by both myself and other people who happened across it(do note that I won't be able to put all of the links, only 10 of them thanks to Tumblr's limit, but I've selected the utmost important ones to be hyperlinked and screenshots from some of these links have been used later on down in this post):

*These qoutes that are hyperlinked are all things that he has ACTUALLY said about Dakota

"You know nobodies gonna give a shit about your story if you never write it right?"

"you're cheating on your apparent "boyfriend" now?"

"I am not obessed with Dakota. I do read other stories. Which is why she pisses me off."

"getting her riled up is fun."

"I JUST said it’s fun, plus she deserves it."

"She’s a toxic, manipulative, delusional writer. Who doesn’t deserve an audience."

"Just admit you don't love her she's impossible to love."

They confirmed that these three separate accounts (un-important-fool, chaosab0veitall, and b-tchidowhatiwant) were and are created by the same individual:

While using the Tumblr platform directly against Dakota, he has also used those close to Dakota to try and turn them against them by being "polite" and "supportive" towards them. This has mainly been aimed at Fluidfox. Ask Dates are November 25th, 2021. 

He has also turned his ‘support’ toward me. Let it be known here and know that I do not ever support this kind of behavior or display of support of my content when it actively involves bringing down another person simply because you don’t like their content. 

However, despite this blatant guilt tripping mainly towards Fox, he does so to others who call him out on his actions with the same tactics or anger and unpleasant comments. 

*Please note that there are more, but because of Tumblr's 30 image per post limit, I can not put up more than what I have now and I will gladly share these images if people ask for them. There will also be in here that will be added as well so everyone can see where they came from.

Nevertheless, despite his actions toward Fox and those who call him out, most of his aggression and negative behavior is aimed directly at me for defending Dakota and dating them. Screenshot dates are November 24th, 2021, and December 1st, 2021 as well as a few screenshots from a link below.

However, recently he's changed tactics completely by escalating to blackmailing and threats. He’s made threats to ‘out’ my partner as a current tcester, even though she is not if she would ‘comply’ with his demands to ‘never post TMNT content’ and to back out of the fandom, as seen in these screenshots: 

Even after she agreed to do that, he still decided to make the post anyway. I’m not directly linking it at all as to not give him attention, here it is. Let’s talk about it. 

There are many things that are wrong with this post, let’s count them out. 

This is not fucking true. Not at all. I know my partner better than he does, and I know that she's not a tcester, the absolute audacity to dig up shit from someone's past, something that they no longer are identify with and have made it clear they have indeed grown as a person is fucking appalling and despicable. He is intent on isolating her within this fandom by trying to use stuff from her childhood against her.

These shots are clearly edited to hell and back. None of these things match each other, the fonts aren't the right size, and god knows what else. I have the originals that she shared with me and can prove that he is lying about it. Here are the screenshots: 

3. This bastard has the audacity to act as if he doing the right thing, that he’s being self-righteous as if he’s doing the right thing by this fandom by wrongly slandering another person’s reputation and then having the audacity to ping my main account(@polyrhyme is my main Tumblr blog, this blog, @goldenspecterr is where I’m most active) and act so smug about it. These are the signs of someone who is clearly obsessed, a stalker with no good damn intentions, especially with tags such as these:

This dangerous behavior has been expanded upon by Fluidfox in this post. The most important highlights in the post are calling out this user's need to warn the TMNT fandom without support from other TMNT users, their stalker behavior, and harassment towards others.

In summary, @b-itchidowhatiwant is a dangerous individual who has spread nothing but hate in an act of a misguided attempt at 'helping save' the fandom from @dakotafinely.This user stalks manipulates and harasses those who get involved with their twisted need to tear down Dakota. It's advised to block this user, report their blog, and take their hate posts as ill will with improper sources. 

This user accused me of making the ‘threat’ to out them out as a stalker, and I decided to follow through with it. So I’ll say to y'all what I said to him: 

Fandom’s a privilege, as well as being a part of fandom spaces, those are privileges. If you do shit like this, you do not ever deserve to have those privileges at all. You act like this, stalk, harass, and bully people in fandom, you lose the privilege to be in fandom spaces, and that's final. 

I’ve been through hell and back in this damn fandom. I’ve fought bullies, tyrants, groomers, and god knows who else and fucking came out on the other side a goddamn winner, and I’ll do the same here. I will make sure that you never know peace for the rest of your time that you are on this damn platform if you @b-tchidowhatiwant continue to harass and stalk my partner, and knowing my history of who I’ve gone toe to fucking toe with, that’s not a goddamn threat, it’s a fucking promise. One I’m filling with glee. 

Batter up motherfucker, I’m fucking swinging, and I’m making a homeFUCKINGrun. 

#rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt #tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt 2003 #tmnt 2k12 #tmnt 2012 #tmnt 2k18 #rottmnt raphael

[princess-of-the-corner]

Oh yeah I agree with the nuance, I just think having Chat + halfish of her allies turning on Maribug bc of her actions hurting them that badly would push her into 'i am a horrible person who did everything wrong' thinking .

Like, everything she did was for the Greater Good, but if so many people she cares about were this hurt and she didn't even see it, she must be Bad.

Which is why I think she'd have a Civil War ending breakdown.

Hell, I could even see her wanting and mb even trying to renounce the Ladybug Miraculous and Guardianship (and her memories).

I truly think that, if confronted by all the hurt she caused her loved ones 'for the Greater Good' Mari would break, not double down. And it wouldn't be a 'oh I'm so sorry I saw the error of my ways in twenty minutes and now we're all good now' breakdown, it would be a 'season finale, hero hit rock bottom, how are they gonna bounce back from this' breakdown.

Oh yeah it'll get there eventually.

But it's also like.

There's the initial doubling down which she has already done in Canon whenever this topic came up. If she doesn't do it, things will be worse so she has to. They understand that, don't they? She knows she's not a bad person, she's a good person! Sure she makes mistakes, but she's not a bad person!

And it gets into a cycle of 'I know you're hurt but-' which accidentally invalidates everything they feel. And I think Adrien in specific would be pissed about that because yeah this all started because one fucker decided to say 'I know it will hurt people but -'.

The problem is that she doesn't know how to fix it without confronting that you can do awful shitty things that hurt others on a monumental level and still be a good person.

And on one hand yeah she might have a snap where she goes 'I'm an awful person I should quit you'd be better off without me etc.'. But that has to be handled well for two reasons.

1.) Mari would know that quitting like that would make things worse. Throughout the fighting they've emphasized that they do still care, they're just very hurt by what happened. They also know that she does feel bad. That's not the issue. The issue is the justification of it.

and

2.) if not done right, then her having her breakdown and everyone going 'okay I see you feel bad you're forgiven' is very guilt trip. No one would be over their hurt. They'd just stop bringing it up because doing so sends her into the 'I'm such an awful person I should leave' mode. Not to say that this can't happen, though ofc it would be accidentally and wouldn't last. They need to genuinely work this out.

#ml leaks #ml civil war

[alharringtonfan]

i hate martin walls

Just slightly pissed off

Oh my Lord I've never felt this much hatred over some random stranger that doesn't even know I exist in my life before. Jfc Martin Walls is a piece of shit person and creator. A disingenuous, clout-chasing, performative, woke garbage, progre, grifting brainless fuck. Oh my God. Genuinely. I'm sorry but I'm 100% non-partial. Alex is INNOCENT. These """"""victims"""" have laid out their cards on the table and all Alex has to do is make a response on it. They can't combat because all of the "evidence" has already been shown. He can say whatever the fuck he wants and what can they do? Do more guilt-tripping? Peer-pressure?

Waaaaaa but no one believes real sexual abuse victims so I must belive them without a second thought!!! Waaaaa but they are victims they did nothing wrong!!!!! Waaaaa but martin is just trying to be a good guy he just wants to help the victims!!!!!!

Idgaf about STAB or whatever other principle plebbit has come up with. FUCK ALL OF THEM. SUE SUE SUE SUE SUE SUE SUE SUE SUE SUE SUE SUE

So I should respect some motherfucker that ruined a guy's reputation and career because some sociopathic shitheads exposed all of his private information? Why so? These people DESERVE the treatment they're giving others. They absolutely deserve getting harrassed because that's what they're doing to an innocent man that's being thrown under the bus by people he once considered his friends. I may be a Christian and try to follow Christ's teaching at all times but even God was a vengeful god. Jesus got pissed off over people betraying their own values, so why shouldn't I?

I don't care at this point. These people aren't victims. They are a DISGRACE to true sexual abuse victims and a DISHONOR to the life their parents have given them. Imagine you carry a baby for 9 whole months only for it to grow into fucking Martin Walls. Total chilean death NOW.

Ok fuck it. FOR REAL NOW I will drop this until Alex makes a statement back. I'm going to bed and I will be sleeping like a BABY knowing I'm not an illiterate zoomer that is so influential they'd easily fall for Adolf Hitler's propaganda machine and be the biggest nazi facist motherfucker alive if that was what was socially acceptable nowadays. (or if it was what Martin Walls said was cool)

And yes, that AK boot is tasting FANTASTIC today. The mud really accentuated the flavor of utter bullshit coming straight from Twitter itself.

May YHWH forgive me. Peace out ✌️

#ranting and raving #alex exposed epic commentary #unrelated

[just-jsabin-in-the-milky-way]

Excuse my language, I'm pissed

Following up on my announcement earlier this morning. Beware, I'm super upset so I might sound like a totally different person. /srs

As much as I'd love to leave the Jayden Drama behind and move on, it seems like I just can't.

Yeah, he's fucking back.

Context of the post I got pinged/mentioned:

First things first, who the fuck decided to ask JAYDEN the guy who groomed and guilt-tripped and manipulated people and who I don't want anything with, to draw my oc. I am so fucking mad right now and tired because I hate this. I've been trying to forget all the shit he's done but no, I get a fucking reminders, from anons asks to now this.

I want to clarify that I never sent that ask because why the fuck would I want to get fanart from the likes of him? Thank god he for once respected and decided not to do the request. I despise that he sugarcoated the entire situation that got him off the platform in the first place like it was a minor thing when spoiler alert IT IS NOT.

I will say it again, I don't forgive the shit you did so don't act all friendly. To think I actually thought you were a good person, you tried to guilt trip me with an alt account to make fanart of your OCs. I didn't enjoy the time we had, not after the shit you did to me and my friends.

To the anon that sent that ask, FUCK YOU. Next time ask the creator before you ask requests of other ppl's OCs.

My last note is to block Jayden's new account, especially if you were the people impacted by him. I hope to not have to deal with any more shit after making this post but knowing the current trend that seems unlikely.

Stay safe y'all, I'm so done with this shit.

I'm super sorry if this comes out as overly aggressive, I think it's from bottling this all up for so long.

Links to evidence of his shit:

#tw swearing #announcement #jsab #just shapes and beats #rant #psa

[heinzpilsner]

It's basically me analysing things with Yon Rha again, but withot being too offensively unempathic and biased, lol

Hey, I'm trying, you can give me that at least!

(Perhaps if I didn't ignore all my notifications, I'd get it faster, but hey, I quite enjoy my little intellectual puzzle here so far. Don't wanna spoil it for myself with interactivity, lol)

Okay, thinking of Katara's encounter with Yon Rha not through the prizm of my zutara brainrot now (not gonna pretend it is not affecting my judgment, it most definitely still is, lol), maybe I'm not giving enough credit to the cognitive/informational component of this event.

(Your honour, there are so many components in here, and whose components have components on their components! You can't expect me to juggle all of them at the same time and not ending up like Zuko during his date with Jin, lol)

Previously I said it was a fruitless trip, but I didn't really take into account the specifics of the case - the ones connected to learning Yon Rha's side of the story and seeing him as a person, - as well as more subtle psychological consequences of the encounter. But as I said early, I'm not a psychologist (also, not the most emphatically gifted person around, as you already can tell I guess, yikes), and my understanding of intricacies of such inner workings is quite limited.

Also, there is a thing to consider - I don't know much about the writer, and how psychologically competent she was. Of course, I could go full "author is dead" approach here and try and read really hard into this case as if it was a real life event (I wouldn't be surprised if someone much more competent than I already did it though), but... I'm trying working through "what author really implied by this" logic when analysing tSR because I respect the writer's ability to build a coherent psychological narrative within her work - given how ambitious she was with the complexion of chosen topics, you'd expect no less from her. Just throwing a bunch of random events on your audience end expect them to built their customised narrative out of it may be a fun postmodern game, but... Just but, I guess.

What I'm saying here is that there's two things about the encounter that can be easily noticed even by most casual watchers but not by me apparently geez.

First of them is that Katara learns there was a reason behind her mother's death - namely, Katara's waterbending. Oh boy. What can I say? I guess the girl could live without the guilt and painful associations connected to her bending produced by the knowledge. Another point to my "maybe facing Yon Rha wasn't such a great idea after all" argument, I guess.

Still, it was important for Katara to learn about her mother's last moments and sacrifice. It was pretty insensitive of me to overlook this fact in my previous analysis (... and I can only imagine how many people I potentially pissed off by this, oops. In my defence though - the whole "revenge" context was pretty distracting). I guess you can't call the trip completely fruitless then - althouht the fruits, may I say, were bittersweet at best and sour at worst.

(Thinking about it now, it's kinda curious that the only truly valuable thing Zuko got from his "closure" with Ozai well, except for the valuable opportunity to practice his lightening redirection was information about his mum as well, even though it wasn't his initial intention. Was it a deliberate parallel, I wonder?

... Wait a minute, why it wasn't Zuko's intention though? It would make much more sense, if you ask me. Oh well, I guess writers had too many things to juggle on their hands as well.)

Another thing is that at the start of the episode Yon Rha was a "monster" for Katara, and then he became just an empty sad man to her. I take it as a deliberate point the writer made. But what exactly does it mean within the narrative? Just a fact of life? A thing for Katara (and audience) to reflect on with no real consequences within the plot?

Or was Yon Rha's personality somehow connected to why Katara forgave Zuko, after all? But how, exactly?

I can only think of juxtaposition. "Look at this guy, Zuko is not so empty and cares about his mum, hence he's worth of forgiveness" kind of logic. But... I mean, Zuko has many problems obviously but emptiness was never one of them, lol. It still counted, perhaps - amongst other small weights on the scales (the weight of it depends entirely on Katara's previous assessment of Zuko's personality though, and I have reasons to believe it wasn't so unflattering at this point).

Does this whole 'cognitive' perspective rearrange my understanding of the reasons behind Katara's forgiveness of Zuko? Yep.

Looking at the trip as meaningful for Katara now (Zuko helped her to learn about her mother's sacriface), it makes much more sense to me. Many of my previous arguments still stand, but the weight shifted more towards platonic reasons (I mean, on one hand, this reason is linked to their connection in Ba Sing Se and reinforces it, but on the other, it's a rational reason for forgiveness, as opposed to irrational ones).

Which feels more appropriate by being less shippy, even though it was fun to compose bizzare conspiracy theories about secretly coded zutara puzzle left by the writer for us to decipher, lol (Your honour, the writer was zutara, it wouldn't be that unlikely!)

It's all about interpretations though. As I said, there are so many components in here you can easily transform the context by shifting the weights as you like.

(Ugh, my posts manage to become obsolete so fast. But hey, it's my live thinking process you're looking at, what do you expect, lol?

I'm not trying to create perfect things for people to repost or something. It's just me playing with my mind to relax. It's nice.)

#atla #katara #zuko

[mysticaltora8276]

"I don't understand these people. (Neither do I welcome to the club )They want me gone because of something I can't control, (my my mind doesn’t that sound bigoted? And by the way, the narrative is wanting us to believe that they are the heroes. Not in an unreliable, narrator, way, or showing how gray they are but legitimately, we are supposed to be rooting for them in their bigotry )and yet Jilka has to stay, even though she wants nothing more than to leave. (because that’s not creepy and terribly misogynistic. Also, Bethany is an awful friend because she was willing to let someone else take the fall until she realized it was her ex friend. So she guilt trip people into basically kidnapping her friend into a compound that she didn’t even want to be in. Not to mention that their emotional awareness was so bad, including the non-clone scar that she had to explain why it was a bad thing that her friend was in prison due to her actions….. yes really she had to explain to them why this was important. Now this would be an interesting discussion on their lack of emotional awareness, but these guys are supposedly the ideal so they’re so emotionally aware that basically, if someone friend of a relative that they know is in prison, they have to be explained on why this is bad. Yikes) I was taught that every individual should be free to make their own choices, (careful. Now you’re becoming self-aware. Watch the author ignore this entirely ) and that the duty of a Jedi is to protect that freedom. ( freedom from what? She doesn’t really specify what freedom she’s protecting. Then again what do I expect from the notorious Jedi hater .) It's not fair, and that's why I don't ever want to be a Mandalorian." 
-Tallisibeth "Scout" Enwandung-Esterhazy, Jedi Padawan.

The one thing I hate about this quote from the books is the fact that she took Scout and incredibly interesting and very thoughtful character and try to push her into Etain’s role and warped her character to where she was this innocent little lamb, etc. etc. Who in the narrative suddenly wanted to become a Mandalorian because reasons…. not to mention the fact that she’s a Padawan you know the very people that Skirata was perfectly OK with shooting because they dared to want to escape their genocide and now suddenly this one girl because she reminds him of the person that emotionally and psychologically, abused matters now. You know would’ve been great in that book. If she had found out that he had helped the genocide of her people and she blasted her ever loving anger on him. Also, she doesn’t act like she wants to be a Jedi and here’s the thing she loves being a Jedi that is her goal and then suddenly she wants to be a part of “family” ignoring the fact that the Jedi that are family are right now getting massacred Piss off author.


#anti kal skirata #anti karen traviss #star wars

[mlobsters]

supernatural s13e1 lost and found (w. andrew dabb)

metallica's nothing else matters for the road so far recap? mmmk. i loved the black album.* it's in my big playlist right now! and nothing else matters was very teen angst sad boy shit appropriate for me (album came out when i was 11 and i remember it featuring at middle school dances) but this song is way too downtempo for the clips/editing as it progresses before we get to the loud parts. weird choice. and maybe shows do this all the time and it's not with songs i know well enough to notice, but splitting the song up midway through is very jarring. i get cutting down the long instrumental intro, but segueing into lyrics differently? buh. stranger things did it with atmosphere by joy division and it wasn't terrible, but noticeable. but the scene/song combo was so impactful to me i didn't care because i was a mess

the overriding theme here with this song and clip selection is like 🚨FAMILY 🚨okay bro, i get it. calm down. is this why i see people harping on how the show is about family, not just sam and dean? is this gonna be A Thing? or am i projecting? both?? i have literally nothing else i might want do if i don't watch this. but i also don't really want to watch this. sigh.

and now i'm all distracted by them using some new fancy filming technique while they're driving where they're being paced and we're seeing the conversation from the outside and it was cool at first but it keeps going and now i'm just too busy trying to figure out where the camera is and where it's going and getting vaguely dizzy.

i get what and why they're doing this thing with jack being at the station with the sheriff but also. im tired

all right. this also reminds me of hmm. combo leo in titanic and ...josh hartnett in pearl harbor?? o.0

glad sam is totally freaked out and afraid of jack, as he should be

JACK (still fondling the wall) Lucifer? No, that's not his name. My father is Castiel.

LOL transcriber! fondling?? how about touching. anyway. papa castiel it is

MIRIAM I don't know what he's told you. I mean, I can guess. Some line about how he and his brother… (deepens voice) save the world. Grr. So macho. (she sighs and speaks in her normal voice) But really, he's not a hero. He's Becky. DEAN Becky? The roommate Becky? MIRIAM You take things and break things and piss people off, and just do whatever you want, no matter who it hurts. Also, you're a giant super bitch. DEAN Well, it takes one to know one. MIRIAM So, yeah, you're Becky, and Becky needs to die.

really odd choice to go with becky for this whole story business, unless they're invoking the actual becky from the show it's just confusing. i really hope it's not show-becky.

i think these are the angels that were in the script in 12x23? got 'em in now, i guess. so i thought carver was around for s12 but apparently it switched to dabb/singer as showrunners that season

....why did the angel just stab the sheriff's kid...? i know they're generally not big on humans but stabbing one for no real reason other than some distraction seems a bit excessive.

MIRIAM: Oh, sweetie. Almost anything. Castiel, he's dead. All the way dead, because of you.

rolling my eyes. that's a reach to try to induce a guilt trip

conveniently got confirmation that jack can't be killed easily, as expected being how they talk him up like he's more powerful than anything basically for whatever reason

DEAN Okay, Chuck… or God, or whatever. I need your help. See, you– you left us. You left us. You went off. You said… You said the earth would be fine because it had me… and it had Sam, but it’s not, and we’re not. We’ve lost everything. And now you’re gonna bring him back. Okay? You’re gonna bring back Cas, you’re gonna bring back Mom, you’re gonna bring ‘em all back. All of ‘em. Even Crowley. ’Cause after everything that you’ve done, you owe us, you son of a bitch. So you get your ass down here and you make this right, right here and right now.

being a cynical asshole but ok scenic backdrop for this praying to chuck that he could have done in the car. and he's giving my kids when they want something. need some foot stomping. punch something and risk breaking your hand instead, good choice

i think there's a handful of reasons** but i have never emotionally connected with cas and this... angsting and preparing to burn him and all, knowing that it's all going to be walked back at some point, it's just frustrating and exhausting. and now we're mourning cas, kelly, mom, crowley....

i didn't want to be sitting and stewing over pondering the logistics of how cas comes backs so i went and looked it up. and um, okay. i'm sure i'll have some thoughts about when it rolls around.

well, suffice it to say, i didn't particularly enjoy this episode. and had surprisingly little (for me) to say about it.

**his characterization that seems to change week to week is part of it and how the show talked up his relationship with the boys but didn't match up to what they were showing us for seasons on end. and unfortunately, how some sectors of fandom are about him also i think has an effect. which is a bummer all the way around

*oh james. i do enjoy your voice. i saw them live once or twice i think, but i don't really remember it. it was in the days of the album with the blood and jizz on the cover, which people didn't like. the songs or the jizz, i think

according to wikipedia, james also didn't like the blood and jizz artwork, and says homophobic shit in his explanation. great!

#supernatural #spnwatch #spn 13x01 #spnwhinge #andrew dabb

[lamarckianenterprises]

My Memories (CW: Past Suicidal Ideation, Urination mention, Desecration)

Earlier this morning my mother asked me if I could, as someone who was traumatized by their parent’s divorce to the point of considering suicide, recount my experiences and methods for recovering from my trauma as a helpful primer for recently divorced parents and their children. It sounds all well and good but there’s just one problem: I can’t actually remember how I did it. 

Not because my mind blocked it off as a sort of trauma response or anything mind you, even without properly trying I can get a pretty good blow by blow of my reactions, but that’s the thing really, that’s all I can remember by now. Think of it this way, it’s sorta like….

Surabaya is built atop the ruins of dozens and dozens of cities, they may not all be of the same size and scale, and while some of them are named Surabaya or some variation of Surabaya not all of them are. But these cities were very real, people really did live and work in them, and learning about them can be very worthwhile, digging in deep to gleam anything at all about how the people lived, what their houses looked like, what they did for a living, what they ate and drank and worshiped and get a sense of the scale of it all. But I can’t for the life of me figure out how all this is supposed to relate to modern day Surabaya, I mean sure today’s world didn’t just spring out of nothing one day, but I think it gets harder and harder the further down you go, after all how is the history of Jung-La-Yu at all relevant for studying or understanding what modern day Surabaya and its people are like?

And that’s the thing, when I think back to then I’m not picking at an old scab, going through yesterday’s leftovers, or walking down the street, I’m digging into the dirt, I’m going through a museum. I can clearly say that certain things happened, and I can certainly tell you in somewhat certain terms when it happened, where it happened, and how it went down, but I haven’t the foggiest why it happened at all.

I can tell you that at some point around 9 years old I walked past the bookcase in the living room of the last home my parents shared and realized that I forgot what the Indonesian word for crab was, I can tell you that before that I tried to impress some friends by showing them a Ben 10 Upgrade toy my father got me and realized that none of them knew what the hell it was, that even further before that I was young and dumb enough to get away with pissing in a mosque’s washroom, and that at some point when I was 13 I looked out at my apartment’s balcony when I was alone and wondered if I should just jump right off. 

What I can’t tell you is what was going through my mind in and around that time, or why any of it seemed like something I would be doing in the first place. I can sure as hell guess, but so can anyone else really.

And hell, maybe the narrow band of what we consider ‘core memories’ that serve as the foundation of our personality and behavior have always lied closer in our past than we think, as the simple act of living and remembering changes what we hold dear gradually enough that we can’t quite remember when it was ever different, maybe all of our memories no matter how grand and seemingly life changing are doomed to slowly rot away any traces of additional meaning and remembered thought over the years until it becomes just another thing that happened, or maybe I just got sick of my mind constantly trying to guilt trip me with my past mistakes that I just learned to let go of it all and start over.

My mind is fire, not stone. All I know is that just as I looked back in my past today and realized that I couldn’t quite figure out why he didn’t jump out of that balcony or leapt into that river when given the chance, I know that one day, in 10-20 years I’ll think back to the time I wrote this article, and can’t for the life of me figure out why she would sit down and write all this for. 

#writing #journalling #memories #childhood trauma #trauma

[weabooweedwitch]

Gosh the way you worded that was so manipulative! You were defending yourself and giving reasons why people deserve to be abused by you while simulateously self-flagellating, threatening suicide and callimg yourself a 'monster' which you clearly don't actually believe otherwise you wouldn't have also listed all of those excuses and defences like 'my manager leaves sticky cans around' and 'my therapist said my mom doesn't respect boundaries when I was a child'. Not once have you expressed any empathy for your mom or anyone else, you're just talking about yourself. You're clearly trying to guilt people into condoning your actions and comforting you, which many of your followers will now do because they feel sorry for you because of your classic manipulative covert narcissist tactic of 'cry and self flagellate when I get called out so people feel bad enough to ignore/excuse my abusive behavior and comfort me'. It pisses me off that so many people are going to fall for this, that's how it always goes with people like you. Shit, 99% of my clients only present to the clinic because their abuse escalated to the point of criminal violence and mandatory treatment orders, their lives are just full of enablers who buy this guilt-tripping strategy that narcs always employ to avoid accountability and get validation. They think their insecurity is an excuse to abuse people, and they use their perceived criticisms of others as a pass to not feel guilty for treating people like shit while expecting princess treatment from others. If you really feel that guilty, TAKE ACCOUNTABILITY. Anything else is a cop-out

I'm not even trying to be like this. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I feel like I've already tried everything I can.

I'm just saying how I feel? I'm giving examples of why I'm frustrated? I've spent my whole life trying to be better and recover and try medicines and just be normal and I'm constantly being told I'm getting worse and worse and now I have more responsibilities than ever

I guess I just. I guess I'm a quitter. My entire life whenever I get so overwhelmed I literally just have to step back because I physically can't handle it anymore and I guess this is no different.

I never wanted special treatment. I just want basic respect. I just want apologies when I'm wronged. I want people to acknowledge when things aren't my fault. I want the things I do and say to matter

If me just trying to say how I feel is manipulative without even trying, when I'm literally just trying to say exactly how I feel, and my inherent nature as a person itself is manipulative, then. I'm accidentally the kind of person I hate the most.

Honestly what you're saying is only reinforcing what I'm feeling. I've been trying so hard to keep myself calm because everything with my mother is escalating to the point where I'm afraid I might hurt her. If you genuinely think I'm just like all these violent people who ligerallt had to be locked away. Then I have to take care of myself before I hurt anyone