#paubaya | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

seaadc · 8 months

Text

leaving. | xiao x gn!reader

a/n: this is inspired by moira dela torre’s song “Paubaya”! make sure to listen to it, its greaattt<3 (NO HATE TO LUMINEE)

summary: you and xiao loved eachother so much, treated eachother fairly, not until traveler came into your world. part 2.

“I’m leaving it all up to her.”

Xiao loved you, for whoever you are, for whatever mistake you did. And you loved him unconditionally. Truth be told, You loved him more than he loved you.

He doesn’t express his feelings, it took quite a while for you to befriend him but he got comfortable around you. Whenever you left, he would realize how empty his world is when you were gone. He would come back to you first after arguments, And you would do the same.

You both knew who was in the wrong at petty fights, If Xiao was, He would come back to you and apologize with roses in his hand. You would of course forgive him since he was your boyfriend.

Every rose he gave you, you put them all up in a vase. To put it simply, you collected that one rose he gave you that night when you guys’s argument was really bad. Both were in the wrong but Xiao chose to say it was his fault.

You both were happy, No one was meddling in your life, You didn’t care if people gossiped on ‘how on earth did you choose a yaksha to be your boyfriend?’.

You both didn’t care, Not a single care left in the world as you both loved each-other unconditionally.

Until, Traveler came. Her name was Lumine, You could tell she was not from here because of how she dresses. She had blonde hair that reaches to her shoulders, A pretty fair lady.

Xiao had stopped hanging out with you during his freetime, He says he has to protect all of Liyue and you understood that. Probably because you just don’t want the both of you to have an argument.

You decided to visit Wangshu Inn, holding some Almond Tofu you cooked in your home before leaving. You greeted Verr and asked where Xiao is.

“Oh, Xiao? He’s upstairs at the balcony. He’s with—“ You cut Verr off with a thanks and rushed immediately to the balcony upstairs, That place was also where both of you had your first date. You still remember that shy face of Xiao that day.

But today, You were met with that same expression. Not to you, But to Lumine.

You stood there, all the excitement in your body gone as it was replaced with disappointment. The pale expression on your face explains how this scenario hurt you.

Xiao and Lumine were on the railings, Lumine laughing with her eyes closed while Xiao was blushing with a pink hue spreaded across his cheeks, He looked down at Lumine’s lips and kissed her which— in turn, Lumine reciprocated.

You put on a sad smile, putting down the plate in the table causing a sound to which Xiao flinched at and his expression turned dark when he realized you were there.

“[Name]..? You.. w-were here?” Xiao mumbled, his heart pounding due to nervousness while Lumine was shocked. Her eyes widening.

I wonder what her flying companion would think of this.. behavior she had been doing.

You smile at them and bow, looking over to Xiao. “I just dropped by some Almond Tofu, have fun.” You say, putting on the most brightest smile, yet, Xiao could tell it was fake.

You left, rushing down the stairs with tears welling up in your eyes as Verr tried to ask if you were okay but you sprinted past her desk.

You sat down on the chair in your kitchen, A blank expression on your face while you stared into oblivion.

Xiao went inside, You stood up and looked at him. He was sweating and panting.

“[Name].. Can we please.. talk..?” He murmured, gulping and approaching you in the kitchen.

You walked over him to face him, smiling sadly at him while you cupped both his cheeks. You hugged him tight, He reciprocated the hug tenderly and you both stayed like that for a few minutes..

You were the one he embraced, but he was still thinking of her.

“Xiao.. If you truly loved me.. Choose her.” You mumbled, pulling away from the warm embrace that you wished, oh wished to have lasted longer but you couldn’t. you just wouldn’t.

Xiao winced at your words and shook his head, He opened his mouth to speak but you cut him off. “Where did my love lack? I gave everything to make you smile.” You said, looking down with a faint smile.

You both stayed quiet, the silence wasn’t peaceful. It was sad, and pale.

You looked up at him while Xiao’s eyes widened at the sight, You were tearing up. Tears were dripping down from your eyes and down to the floor while you looked at him.

“I love you Xiao, truly. So that’s why..” You paused, wiping your tears while you cupped both his cheeks after and you kissed him on the forehead while his eyes were welling up with tears that threatened to fall.

“I’m letting you go.”

You said, which made his tears fall, He hugged you, tighter than that last hug. You cried at his shoulders, patting his back while he silently cried on your back.

Xiao pulled away, wiping his tears while you both headed onto the door. You pointed at the door and smiled sadly at him.

“Go.. please.. She’s waiting for you.” You chuckled in a sad tone, Xiao smiled and kissed you, one final time before he left.

You counted, wishing he would come back and hug you in his embrace while you hugged him by the shoulders.

One..

Two..

…

Three.

You had burst into tears, crying, but no shoulder to cry on. You didn’t have an arm wrapped around you tightly, You didn’t have an arm that had tattoos trying to comfort you while soft hands took off the strands of hair in your face.

You had no one else, except you.

You were the one he needed, but not the one he loved.

Lumine had met up with you, outside of your house. You smiled at her and hugged her, then reached your mouth over to her ears. “Don’t make him cry like what I did… Please.. take care of him.”

Lumine widened her eyes at your words, she then squinted it then returned the hug, nodding while you pulled away and smiled sadly.

She walked away, Xiao next to her side while you were there, alone.

No one to wake you up in the morning, No one to support you to what you wanted to do.

While you didn’t notice, the rose Xiao had gave you that was in your vase, The rose you kept so long and taken care of, one of it’s petals has fell.

Xiao looked at Lumine tenderly, love and desire plastered onto his eyes while he smiled slightly.

“And it can be really seen in your eyes, why you chose her.”

280 notes · View notes

thisonegirl · 7 days

Text

A lot of the fics I had saved have been deleted hence the short list (many of my favorites were among the fallen💔) but these are the surviving ones. Please recommend some fics , I’m always on the lookout for new ones.

⚠️WARNING⚠️quite a bit of these (most, if not all actually) are not safe for work content. Some are very sexually graphic. Symbols will be used to distinguish them.

main masterlist

MINORS DNI —> ALL OF THE CONTENT INCLUDED HERE IS +18 ONLY

PS : for series, I am linking my favorite part/chapter (please let me know if it would be better to link the first part or the master list if it’s available)

❤️‍🔥 - nsfw 🖤- dark ❤️‍🩹 - angst 💕- sfw 🏆- favorite

BTS

jungkook | Acquaintances | one shot | by @2hightocare - ❤️‍🔥

jungkook | Stay | one shot | by @jungkxook - ❤️‍🔥

jungkook | Quiet Rides | one shot | by @inkedtae - ❤️‍🔥

jungkook | Halloween Treat | one shot | by @adonis-koo - ❤️‍🔥

jungkook | Naughty Pictures | one shot | by @sparklingchim - ❤️‍🔥

jungkook | Gaming and Cockwarming | one shot | by @smilesjeon - ❤️‍🔥

taehyung | Heatwave | one shot | by @curly-bangtan - ❤️‍🔥

namjoon | Booty Call | one shot | by @jeonnhera - ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🔥

yoongi | Disco Overload | one shot | by @caught-in-a-seesaw-stigma - ❤️‍🔥

yoongi | Unexpected | series | by @noona-la-la-la - ❤️‍🔥 (🏆)

SEVENTEEN

mingyu | Challenge Me | series | by @seokgyuu - ❤️‍🔥

mingyu | The Perils of Apartment Living | one shot | by @dontflailmenow - ❤️‍🔥

NCT 127

jaehyun | WET THE BED | one shot | by @jamjaemin - ❤️‍🔥

jaehyun | no title | one shot | by @freakynct - ❤️‍🔥

jaehyun | Team Captain | one shot | by @smileysuh - ❤️‍🔥

jaehyun | I’m Not The Only One | one shot | by @theje0ngs - ❤️‍🩹(🏆, it stings though)

jaehyun | Paubaya | one shot | by @theje0ngs - ❤️‍🩹

jaehyun | Heartaches | one shot | by @smileysuh - ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🔥

johnny | Not Another Song About Love | series | by @ms-indifferwnt - ❤️‍🩹

multiple | Quarantine Chronicles | series | by @domjaehyun - ❤️‍🔥 (🏆, literal icon with 28k words)

GOT 7

multiple | Open Season | two-part | by @smileysuh - ❤️‍🔥

multiple | Rosemary & Thyme | one shot | by @softforimjaebum - ❤️‍🔥

EXO

baekhyun | Paraphilia | series | by @byuntrash101 - ❤️‍🔥

baekhyun | Edging | one shot | by @biaswreckingfics - ❤️‍🔥

jongin | Daddy | one shot | by @xofanfics - 💕❤️‍🔥

BIG BANG

seunghyun | Messes We Made | series | by @noonachronicles - ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🔥

43 notes · View notes

zzoguri · 8 months

Text

UPDATED AS OF SEPTEMBER 14, 2023, 6:30PM (GMT+8)

requests status ➵ slots are closed!

how to request ➵ send an ask following the format: "tbz member + one song from the list + possible scenario you want (not required)" and you will receive! if you're looking for a certain scenario, please be as descriptive as possible! please keep in mind that the song you pick will have a determined genre linked to it.

ex. "jacob + must be love by laufey + possibly reader just doing their own thing and jacob is just admiring, only for this scene playing out to be his realization of him falling in love"

guidelines/reminders ➵ i have every right to deny a request if i believe i cannot fulfill it or if i'm uncomfortable writing it ➵ please don't expect me to be speedy with requests... there is a chance i may not fulfill it LMFAO so don't come into my asks fully expecting smth ➵ most requests will be <10k and will most likely be focused on a certain scenario or two ➵ i will not write yandere or majorly toxic themes! but i will write fluff, suggestive/smut, and angst depending on the song you choose teehee! if you're worried that i may deny your request, just send it and i'll let you know if something about it is something i'm not comfortable to write about ➵ only writing x readers! ➵ requests won't be done on a "first come; first serve" basis!

a/n ➵ happy to announce that i am officially opening requests! yup, i thought that to beat my silly writer's block, i can start doing some requests for the time being. it's also my way of celebrating 200 followers!! i'll be opening limited slots for the time being. however, if i decide that i want to keep doing more requests, i may accept more later on.

song list ➵ and july by heize & dean ➵ apple cider by beabadoobee ➵ apple pie by lizzy mcalpine ➵ arms unfolding by dodie ➵ as long as it takes you by keshi ➵ backburner by niki ➵ bad by wave to earth ➵ bawat piyesa by munimuni ➵ calla by wave to earth ➵ cheese & wine by dpr live ➵ cherry wine by grentperez ➵ chocolate by day6 ➵ clementine by grentperez ➵ cologne by beabadoobee ➵ disconnected by 5sos ➵ everything has changed by taylor swift ft. ed sheeran ➵ hall&oates by yerin baek ➵ i like you by day6 ➵ in what world by lizzy mcalpine ➵ intertwined by dodie ➵ laputa by dpr live ft. crush ➵ let you break my heart again by laufey ➵ loner by yerin baek ➵ lowkey by niki ➵ maps by raffaella & hippo campus ➵ ocean floor by wave to earth ➵ old with you by grentperez ➵ on the drive home by niki ➵ one last time, please by dodie ➵ only by day6 ➵ opposite by sabrina carpenter ➵ pancakes for dinner by lizzy mcalpine ➵ pasilyo by sunkissed lola ➵ paubaya by moira dela torre ➵ pour up by dean ft. zico ➵ put my hands on you by dean & anderson .paak ➵ pwede ba by lola amour ➵ right here by keshi ➵ san francisco by 5sos ➵ second best by laufey ➵ simple season by hippo campus ➵ somebody by keshi ➵ soren by beabadoobee ➵ take off all your cool by sabrina carpenter ➵ text me by dpr live ➵ the 1 by taylor swift ➵ tornado warnings by sabrina carpenter ➵ treacherous by taylor swift ➵ tuesday by hippo campus ➵ valentine by laufey ➵ waste the night by 5sos

34 notes · View notes

mschachaa · 6 months

Text

Destiny :: Boo Seungkwan

Paring :: Boo Seungkwan x Reader

Genre :: Angst

Inspired :: Movie "She's dating the gangster"

Synopsis :: Although you still loved Seungkwan, you made the difficult decision to break up with him. His ex, who was fighting cancer, needed him more than you did. When you told him that you wanted to break up, he was shocked and didn't believe it at first.

Warning :: Heavy ass Angst, Mention of Death, first time writer, some words are in tagalog

Word Count :: 1.2k

"Y/n, please... It's you I love. is it because 'di mo'na ako mahal?" he sobbed, his arms wrapped tightly around you from behind, refusing to release you from his embrace.

as your tears flow uncontrollably you answered him "mahal na mahal, Seungkwan. kung alam mo lang, ayoko mag paubaya sa taong sinaktan ka pero mas kailangan ka niya" You pried his hands apart, freeing yourself from his grasp, and attempted to walk away.

He refused to let go as he pulled you back, bringing you closer to him. He lifted your chin to look at him and kissed you on the lips. There was a hint of desperation and desperation was mixed with his love as he tried to convince you to stay.

"Y/n, please. I love you, not her. I will never love someone like I love you. I will fight for you and make sure that you are mine. You won't regret staying..." He said as his eyes continued to water up.

Your gaze fell to the ground, watching as tears fell uncontrollably from your eyes. "Kwan, please... please," I pleaded. "It's so hard to let you go, but we can't continue like this."

He held your shoulders tightly and looked passionately at you.

"Y/n, please... I need you. I need you to stay. Please, don't go. You are the best thing that has ever happened in my life! I can't just let go of you like that. I need you." He said as tears continued to flow from his eyes and he sniffled. He continued to look at you with love and adoration.

"But...she needs you more than I do. Ayoko maging selfish, boo."

"Perhaps... if Tadhana is kind enough to bring us together again, we'll find each other. And when that time comes, I won't let you go, I promise," You declared, your teary eyes locked with his.

Seungkwan's heart broke when he saw tears pouring out of your eyes. He tried to dry your tears and gave you a tight embrace.

"Please... please don't go. I can't let you walk away like that. I don't want to live without you. You are the love of my life. Please, don't go. I'm begging you..." He said as he continued hugging you, not letting you leave.

"I can't just lose you like this, I'm begging you. Athena will eventually be fine without me. But I can't live my life without you. Please, stay here with me. I know you love me. You can't deny that. I can't be without you... I just can't," he whispered, his head resting on your shoulder as he kissed it, tears continuing to fall from his eyes.

"No, I'm sorry. I don't want to let you go either, but I must," You sobbed, tears streaming down my face as you turned and tried walked away.

He held you gently to prevent you from leaving. He didn't want you to go. Your presence was everything to him. He didn't know what to do without you.

"Y/n, don't go... please, just stay here with me. I still love you. I still need you... please." He said as he wiped away your tears and looked at you with sadness and desperation. He was desperate not to lose you.

"I'm sorry," You murmured, Your voice barely a whisper, heart and soul utterly drained.

He looked at you with tears flowing from his eyes. He refused to believe that you were going to leave him. He held you tightly and lifted your face to look at him.

"You still love me, don't you Y/n?" He whispered to you, hoping that you would tell him that you still loved him.

"I do, Seungkwan, I really do! I love you so much that I can't even imagine giving you up for her! My love for you is so deep that I'd risk everything, anything for you. But I can't let her die..." You whispered, your voice fading to a pained whisper as you uttered those last words.

A feeling of dizziness hit you like a ton of bricks. The emotional roller coaster you were on, along with the secret sickness you were hiding, was just too much. Your vision got all blurry, and your legs felt like they were turning into jelly.

"Y/n, you okay?" Seungkwan's voice sounded like it was coming from far away, his worried face in front of you.

You tried to say something, to tell him you were fine, but no words came out. The world started spinning like a crazy, and you felt yourself falling.

Seungkwan's arms caught you just as you were about to crash onto the ground. He held you tight, his heart racing, as he realized you had passed out.

"Y/n! Y/n!" he shouted, shaking you gently, trying to wake you up. But you stayed silent, your face white as a ghost and your breath barely there.

He didn't waste a moment. He scooped you up and rushed you to the hospital, his heart beating like a drum.

The hospital staff sprang into action as soon as they saw you unconscious. They quickly moved you into an emergency room, where doctors and nurses worked tirelessly to save you.

Seungkwan was left standing outside the room, his heart in his throat, his mind filled with fear and worry. He paced back and forth, his hands clenched, waiting for any news about you.

After what seemed like forever, a doctor came out of the room, his face grim. He walked up to Seungkwan, his voice heavy with regret.

"I'm sorry," he said, "We did everything we could, but we couldn't save her. We discovered that she had been battling cancer, and it had progressed to an advanced stage."

His world fell apart. His knees buckled, and he would have fallen if the doctor hadn't caught him. Tears streamed down his face, his heart breaking into a million pieces.

"No, no, no," he sobbed, his voice choked with grief. "This can't be happening. She can't be gone. Why didn't she tell me about her illness?"

But it was true. You were gone, taken away from him by a cruel twist of fate. The love of his life, the woman who had brought light into his world, was no more.

Seungkwan walked into your hospital room, his heart heavy with grief. He approached your bedside, his eyes fixed on your still form. You looked so peaceful, as if you were merely sleeping, but he knew the truth.

He gently took your hand in his, feeling its coldness against his warm skin. Tears welled up in his eyes as he remembered your last conversation, your selfless decision. your hidden battle with cancer.

"Why didn't you tell me, Y/n?" he whispered, his voice breaking. "Why did you carry this burden alone?"

He leaned down and kissed your forehead, his tears falling onto your pale skin.

"I love you, Y/n," he murmured, his voice filled with sorrow. "I always will."

Hope you enjoy :)

#svt angst #heavy angst #seungkwan x reader #seventeen #seventeen x reader #svt x y/n

15 notes · View notes

take-me-to-the-moon · 3 months

Text

Grabe pa din ang iyak ko kapag napapakinggan ko yung song na " paubaya " ni Moira. It's been 3 months already pero masakit pa din. Ang sakit sakit pa din.

7 notes · View notes

rosiehrs · 2 months

Note

10 QUESTIONS FOR U - valentines edition

favorite color of roses?

favorite flowers?

you can send a love letter to anyone. fictional/idols/celebs. who?

which idols have the best rizz?

most rizzful mutual?

favorite petnames/nicknames? giving or recieving?

fictional characters you're in love with?

have you ever had an online crush?

songs that you want to play at your wedding?

fav breakup songs?

fav love-themed kpop song?

mutual with beautiful themes?

pink vs red ? coquette vs old money / preppy?

favorite sweets?

DRINK WATER + YOU ARE LOVED <3

red/white roses!

tulips ^^

rosie posie park chaeyoung roseanne park

minatozaki sana...............................

all my moots are losers (i love u guys), none of the above!

uh..... no comment ^-^ i like bib tho

WANDA MAXIMOFF.

hahahahahaha next question!

labyrinth - ts!

hahahahahahhahahahahahhahahaha - the apartment we won't share, niki - last kiss, ts - waiting room, phoebe bridgers - paubaya, moira dela torre

underwater, rv

kyuusberry !!

red! old money....

i dont rly like sweets >.<

#─ ❝ bi replies!#now which one of u sent me two of these..#we need to talk.....

5 notes · View notes

simpforotter · 11 months

Text

Here's Becky singing a french song 🎤

She also have a YouTube account but uploaded only one song cover and haven't updated since then because of her hectic schedule ..but if you want to follow her just click the link that I provided ty.

She did a cover of Tagalog song " Paubaya by Moira"

#becky armstrong #beckysangels #gap the series #beckyarmstrong

9 notes · View notes

dxmoness · 1 year

Text

𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐱 𝐒𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐚

Right person, wrong time..

If only the timing was right... Maybe they could've ended with a smile.

tagging, @al-haithamm , @roseadleyn

#Spotify

13 notes · View notes

shina913 · 3 months

Note

Just finished reading gradation!!! So so good!! Would be so cool if you write a little something about them as a family of 3 (or more 🤭🤭)

Also need to catch up your entire masterlist now that i found you hehe

As a Filipina too who is deeeeeply in love with angst and obv drama, & if you ever have a lack of idea, please write something about Moira Dela Torre song’s, Paubaya. Crying the shit out of me everytime I watch that freaking mv😔😔😔😔

Should I call you Shina? Ate? Tita? Hahaha love your works!!

Ahaha omg hello, kababayan!!! I’m always super excited when I find fellow Filipinos on here 😅 welcome and I’m glad you’ve been reading through my masterlist. I haven’t revisited my Gradation couple in a while but we’ll see if I ever find a good DILF prompt somewhere 😜 I could be inspired!

I am verrry much into the angst and drama!! Teleseryes are in my DNA, so that’s also apparent in my writing style. I haven’t listened to Paubaya but I do love listening to OPM when I’m in an angsty mood. I’ll add this to my rotation!

And “tita?” Aray 😖 ahahahahha Nah, Ate or Shina is completely fine. We don’t need to be super formal!

Thanks for messaging me and for reading my stories 💜

#shina asks #jkaxl #lovely moots

1 note · View note

mrbigosapagibig · 2 years

Text

Pahinga, Pakilig, Paubaya. Then repeat. 😞

#pinoy #patama #banat #tagalog #quote #rants #pagibig #puso #one liner #sakit #sawi #hugot

20 notes · View notes

neonacity · 2 years

Note

i didnt realized you were the person who wrote paubaya omg😭 i love your works so much!!!❤

Aah yes! Paubaya felt so long ago but it is me lol.😂 Thank you so much for the support sweetheart. 🥰

#neona!answers #neona heavy angst era when again???#fic: paubaya #anon!asks

1 note · View note

mirahuyooo · 2 years

Text

Paubaya | bts

[BTS as the song PAUBAYA by Moira Dela Torre]

— Which part of my love wasn’t enough?

In which, you have to let go of the man you love when he’s in love with someone else

Word Count: 3,331 Content/s: be warned y’all; ANGST, falling out of love, falling in love with someone else, cheating, unrequited love, one-sided pining, fluff if you squint really really good and have blurred vision, saD, SAD HOURS

[masterlist] | more [reactions & headcannons]

A/N: Here comes the first song fic / headcannon thinggg!~ This song is back in my faves so I thought to write this little blurb bc i love angst 🤪💅

Paubaya in Filipino means “to entrust” or “to leave it to someone” which, in the concept of love, means that a person giving up the person they love to someone else

I recommend y’all to listen to the song!! IT’S SO ANGSTY AAAAAA and the music video is juST as heartbreaking (and there are eng translations provided too! Don't worry)

Also, I also tweaked some things I deem to be a more accurate translation. The Filipino language has gender neutral pronouns which is why I tweaked with the english translation from the mv itself instead of the he/him pronouns used \(￣︶￣*\))

ANYWAYS, I hope y’all enjoyed this /(ㄒoㄒ)/~~

KIM SEOKJIN

At kung masaya ka sa piling niya So if you’re already happy with them,

Hindi ko na 'pipilit pa I won’t force it anymore

“I want you to be happy, (Y/N).”

Such words were soft and well-meaning—as wholesome as the very man that said them—and yet they stab you in the heart all the same. How could it not?

An hour ago, your childhood best friend had invited you for lunch in one of the restaurants the two of you frequented in college. You had been excited at the thought of spending time with him, but this was definitely not the turn of events you had expected to happen.

“I think it’s time for you to really move on,” he smiles at you encouragingly.

Kim Seokjin’s rejecting you for the last time.

He made this clear when he showed you the ring he intended to propose with to his partner of three years. It was simple yet pretty, just what you imagine he’d get, and yet to know it wasn’t meant for you, it hurts like bitch.

While you were the reason they met in the first place, the selfish part of you has always held on to the possibility that fate might finally turn things in your favor. Those chances became slim when they got together, and while you had respected their relationship, that little devil in you still hoped they wouldn’t last.

Alas, your struggle with the unrequited pining never really ended.

You often wondered what your friend did differently, that, out of the two of you, it was your signals and confessions that got turned down. It was you who got their hair ruffled, feelings not taken seriously, and teased for having a "fleeting crush" that has been gnawing at you for a decade. It was you who had to swear multiple times that you're going to move on, except you don't because god damn it you love Kim Seokjin with your entire being and heart.

Just as you had gotten used to their relationship, the thought of them getting engaged now opens up a wound in your heart, bigger and deeper than the last. “Can you really not love me, Jinnie?” you ask, quiet as you stare at the ring. “Is there really no chance?”

Seokjin smiles apologetically. “I do love you, (N/N),” he tells you in that brotherly tone he’s always used. “Just not the way you want me to.”

Here he is, wishing you happiness after he finally realized that your feelings he brushed off as a crush ran deeper than he thought, and a part of you resents him for that. Still, the better part of you—the one that’s so helplessly in love with him—wants his happiness, too.

You find yourself nodding slowly, chuckling breathlessly in defeat. “I want you to be happy, too,” you tell him, tears flowing down your cheeks as he lets you pull him into a hug. ”I wish you the best—all the best in the world.”

Maybe this time, you will finally move on.

MIN YOONGI

Ang tanging hiling ko lang sa kanya My only wish to them is that

Huwag kang paluhain at alagaan ka niya They never make you cry and they take care of you

Deep down, you knew.

You knew your time with Yoongi was up.

The gummy smiles, lingering touches, and warmth beside you in bed were once the things that made you feel fuzzy with love, but now they twist and turn your insides. The eyes that once look at you with adoration were fading, and while you knew well he did nothing behind your back, you could tell him staying with you was becoming nothing but a repetitive seesaw game. It's only a matter of time before he asks you both to get off of it.

But before that…

“Do you love him?”

HYBE’s recent rising producer avoids your eyes, practically squirming in guilt. They’ve been working on the new album together, and all it took was one visit to know that his love wasn’t meant for you anymore.

For a couple of months, you tried reigniting the spark you and Yoongi lost, huddling over that could-have-beens and waiting for that warmth to return to you, but it never did. You love him, but you’ve grown tired. You think he has, too.

It’s time to put an end to this.

“Be honest with me, please,” you softly beg, “I need to know.”

Finally, you receive a nod in response, tears brimming around eyes that can’t really stare at you for too long. “I’m so sorry,” they tell you, and a gut feeling tells you they truly do love him. You’ve been in those shoes before, falling helplessly for a man like Min Yoongi.

“Don’t be,” you say, “He loves you, too, you know. I can tell.”

In the distance, you see a familiar figure standing at the entrance of the coffee shop. Your heart clenches as you meet his heavy gaze filled to the brim with concern and sorrow. “Please take care of him,” you turn your attention back to the person before you. “He always forgets to eat and sleep on busy days, and he always manages to fall asleep in the most uncomfortable of places.”

Wide eyes follow you walking towards the man that held both of your hearts in his hands. A glassy-eyed Yoongi waits for you to stop before him, unsure of what to say or do.

It was you who made things easier for him, hands shaking as you take off the ring on your finger. With one last smile, you place it in his hand and give it a squeeze of assurance.

“Life happily, Min Yoongi.”

JUNG HOSEOK

Ba't 'di ko naisip na mayro'ng hanggan? Why didn’t I think that our story would have an end?

Ako 'yong nauna, pero siya ang wakas I was your first, but they will be your last

For your first love, you were given a real gentleman in the form of Jung Hoseok.

The memories you built together in the secret in-betweens of his life as Jung Hoseok and J-Hope of BTS were a core part of you as a person. There was a struggle, of course—with him and his budding career as an idol, and you finishing your studies—but in the moments you were together, the world just felt right. He just felt right. It all felt like it would never end.

Except when it did.

When the distance and everything else became too much, he had asked to break things off. A part of you loved him still—you don't think it's possible to ever stop loving someone like him—but you, too, knew the both of you couldn't hold out any longer with how things were.

You thought, then and there, that it would be impossible for you to stop loving Jung Hoseok even if it would be the last you'd hear from him, but if this is what that was, then you wouldn't mind loving him from afar.

Until, years later, that unspoken promise of yours manifests itself in a more painful form.

You bump into him at a family reunion and meet him as the man your third cousin has been spoken for. The fancy, shiny rock on their finger had all the aunties and grannies squealing.

"It's been a while," Hoseok softly greets, hesitantly holding out a hand for you to shake, and for the sake of civility, you obliged.

Butterflies spring across your belly, and it's a familiar yet dreadful feeling—like the undead coming to take you. "I know, right?" you attempt to muse, retreating your hand. "Life's been good I hope?"

"Good as can be," he politely nods, sending a smile your cousin’s way in a way that makes your heart clench.

The tension must’ve been clear enough on your face, since your cousin picks up on it so easily. "You know each other?" they ask, head tilting in confusion.

You couldn't blame them, or anyone outside the boys and the management, for not knowing. The world didn't know a (Y/N) (L/N) existed—that once upon a time she loved a man named Jung Hoseok and he loved her.

Still, you know it isn’t right or fair for you to chase him when they’re happy and content in their own little bubble. You'll always love Jung Hoseok, even if from afar.

"Yeah," you smile, bittersweet, "but it was a long time ago. Don't worry."

Whoever said first love never dies must've clearly meant something else.

KIM NAMJOON

Ba't 'di ko nakita na ayaw mo na? How could I have missed that you no longer wanted this?

Ako ang kasama, pero hanap mo siya You’re with me, but you were looking for someone else

Kim Namjoon is the best boyfriend you can ever ask for.

When he holds you in his arms, it's one of the best places in the world—so soft like clouds, and so warm like a hearth, that you'll almost always be seen dozing off.

When he gets to decide on the date, he takes you to these places that really heal your soul, and when you pick, he simply goes with the flow.

When he speaks, it's always the most thoughtful, sincerest pieces of his thoughts—one that always brings you comfort, makes you feel seen and heard, and your heart swells with delight.

Which is why you had to say it before you regret not doing so.

"I love you, you know."

The silence of the night sits between you both, the chatter of the party inside nothing but a faded noise. Namjoon stands next to you, gentle giant that he is, making you look up at him with a soft smile on your face.

A blink or two, and he breaks his pause with a stammer. "I…" he hesitates, wetting his lips as he rubs his nape. "I'm sorry…"

Oh. So it's like that after all.

You stand there in silence, heart open for the taking and he's sweating in guilt. "I know we've been together for quite some time now," he seeks to explain himself, "and in the beginning, I really thought this could lead to something real, but there's been a recent epiphany that has changed things for me."

He takes a deep breath. "I'm—"

"in love with someone else?"

The smile on your lips return, and this time, he recognizes the bittersweet hints of it. "I know, Joon," you tell him, "I'm not that blind."

The very person in his heart was inside, having fun with the rest of the members—the same one you've caught receiving the end of his lingering gaze in the past month, the same one that he is so ready to help or hangout with, and the same one he unconsciously looks for every time you're together.

Had he held you, gone to your dates, and spoken to you thinking about them instead?

You don't want to know.

In truth, this was what you've been preparing for to happen—the pain to come from ripping the bandaid you've covered your delusions with. "I…" you breathlessly chuckle, not expecting your heart to be hurting this much. "I really did hope for the probability that you would choose me, but I can see very clearly that this isn't what you want."

Still, if his wisdom had ever taught you anything, it was to cherish what you've had. "I'm glad I tried though," you smile amidst blurring tears. "That I got to know what it's like to have someone as sweet as you be my boyfriend."

"(Y/N)..."

Those warmth he would give, the embodiment of comfort and safety you never quite found anywhere else, and the little things that made you fall in love with him—such things showed you what a good kind of love can feel like.

Deep down, you had wanted to play into your fantasy just a little more before you both had to put an end to it.

You take one hand and squeeze it, indulging in the feel of his hand in yours. "I really do love you though," you tell him, other hand reaching to cup his cheek as you did, "and I want you to be happy. I hope you know that."

A breathy exhale left him as his glassy eyes took you in. "I'm really sorry, (Y/N)..."

"There's no use pretending otherwise," you hush. "The heart wants what it wants."

And it doesn't want me.

Mustering your strength, you tiptoe and give his cheek a kiss. "Thank you for everything."

Kim Namjoon is still the best boyfriend you could've ever asked for, even if he didn't love you in the end.

PARK JIMIN

Ba't 'di mo sinabi no'ng una pa lang? Why didn’t you tell me from the start?

Ako ang kailangan, pero 'di ang mahal That I was who you needed, but not who you loved

“What?”

The rain pours harshly against the windows as the words you hear from your boyfriend rips your heart out from within. You feel the world come to a stop, and you pray—pray—for it all to have been some sick nightmare your brain conjured up from movies and stories.

Park Jimin sits before you, head hung low and fingers fiddling with each other. “I…” he sighs with a shaky breath that takes yours as you wait for him to repeat his confession. “I don’t love you anymore…”

The past year flashed before your eyes—back to when he went from being your best friend to someone who made the butterflies in your belly go wild with excitement. If this had been in the early stages, maybe then you wouldn’t be so hurt—maybe then, you could accept this as a mere fling that’d pass.

Why did he have to make you fall in love with him?

“Is this about who I think it is?”

Jimin flinches and in that instant, you know how much you’ve been a fool all along.

Back when you were young—just teens still joking around and figuring out life—he had fallen for someone he shouldn’t have fallen for, someone who didn’t really love him back the way he had hoped. You’ve seen him cry over her, go through countless stages of grief, and move on to become the man he is today. You’ve held him through that rough patch in his life, and needless to say, you feel utterly betrayed right now.

Last month, their paths crossed again and you thought nothing of it, until now that you’re looking at the disaster that’s come to tear you to shreds. “Was I…” you breath hitched as you try to hold back a sob, “was I just a placeholder all along?”

Jimin’s eyes go wide as he profusely shakes his heart. “(Y/N), no. I just…” he scrambles to sort his words. “I didn’t expect for my feelings for her to come back like this, a-and—”

“What?” you scoff, “they love you now?”

A part of you—a tiny fraction of it—feels some semblance of relief to hear he did love you in some way, but that could only mean you were never enough to compete with that person. You knew it—from the way he was so lovestruck before and from the way he’s shaking with guilt now.

“I’m so sorry,” he cries, as you gather your bearings.

You don’t know how things will end up for them, but you know better than to keep a heart that’ll never be yours. If happiness for him is with them, then you’ll give him that and you won’t be in his life any longer.

“Don’t get your heart broken again, Park Jimin,” you say, soft with your sincerest worry for the man you loved, yet cold from the betrayal you’ve been slapped with. “I’d hate for you to feel like this.”

KIM TAEHYUNG

Ba't 'di mo inamin na mayro'ng iba? Why didn’t you tell me that there was someone else?

Ako ang kayakap, pero isip mo siya I was in your arms, but someone else was on your mind

"It's just not the same anymore…"

In hindsight, you suppose you should've seen this coming.

The moment your clingy boyfriend became distant, his bright, boxy smile becoming strained, you should've seen this coming.

The moment he started making excuses and not coming home to you, you should've seen this coming.

The moment the once comfortable silence became stifling, your mind panicking to fill the void in, you should've seen this coming.

Except you didn't.

Here you are at the dead of night, clutching the covers tightly and pretending to be asleep while Taehyung's sitting at the edge of the bed on a call. You listen to the love of your life confess to his best friend how he's falling out of love with you, and how he's terrified that he's finding that spark in someone else instead.

You don't hear Jimin's end, but something he says makes Taehyung sigh shakily. "I don't know what to do," he says, voice heavy with guilt and heartache. "I can't look at her anymore without feeling shitty. I tried but…"

He's crying.

By some miracle—perhaps that of the gaping hole in your heart—you find yourself too hurt, too shocked, and too much to be in tears. Kim Taehyung, who had always talked of your future together, was now torn between his heart and the promises he's made with you.

"I don't know what to do…"

Stuck between the urge to hug and hit him, you end up doing nothing—until the call ended, until he collected himself enough to cool off in the shower, and until he finally laid down beside you.

For the first time in months, Kim Taehyung holds you close in his arms, and while it sears your heart even more, you let him—snuggle closer to savor what you know may be the last of your moments with him. Later, while he sleeps, you find yourself brushing away the faint crease between his brows, a sad smile on your lips.

You don't know who had started to occupy his heart, but, while you're boiling in a mix of emotions having to face the end of this, you hope deep down that they'll do well to love him back.

"I love you, you idiot," you want to tell the sleeping boy, "but I wouldn't want you stuck with me like this."

You should've seen this coming.

Taehyung had always been the romantic that'd be stubborn about something like this until he's all bottled up, drained, and ready to explode. Just because the two of you had started like a fairytale did not mean you would end up like one.

JEON JUNGKOOK

At kita naman sa 'yong mga mata And I see it in your eyes

Kung bakit pinili mo siya Why you chose them

"Look at this, (Y/N)!"

As he shows you something on his phone, Jeon Jungkook stands beside you with a brilliant smile so full of love and adoration it hurts. Perhaps, it was because you knew very well that it would never be for you.

The screen of his phone played him and the love of his life sky-diving in their recent trip, the two of them making competitive turns to see who gets the most flips while descending the drop. Their laughter echoes and rings through your ears.

It's not fair.

Somewhere, something inside you cries out—the ugly beast called envy you've been coexisting with for the past three years making itself known. Indeed, it wasn't fair.

They don't know him as well as you do.

Unlike you, who grew up with Jungkook and spent weekends playing together at each other's house.

Unlike you, who encouraged his antics and got into trouble with him because of his shenanigans.

Unlike you, who knew a lot of his deepest secrets and seen him in nearly every breakdown.

Yet, unlike you, they’re the one who managed to win his heart.

Every now and then, you find yourself picking her apart, mind swirling in the many ways that made you different from one another, and wondering what part of your love for him wasn't enough to make him yours. It hurts to say it, but you can only acknowledge your defeat. They’re beautiful inside and out, does no harm but takes no shit, and easily commands the attention of everyone in the room. Someone perfect for Jeon Jungkook himself.

With presence alone, his eyes twinkle like the night sky in an absence of light pollution. He giggles—giggles—at any notion of hers he finds utterly adorable, and you hear that giggle more often than you could ever want to hear.

You'd probably fall in love with them too if you weren't so in love with their boyfriend.

Yet, to love someone is to make them happy, and happiness with them was never the same with you. What kind of lover are you if you don't want this shining version of Jeon Jungkook in this world?

You find it in you to smile—for him and the happiness radiating in his life—and feign awe at the adventures they had together. “That looks awesome! How’d you guys manage that?” you say, prompting him to tell you more of the fun he had and watch him light up for the umpteenth time.

𝓽𝓪𝓰𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽 : @mwitsmejk @dreamamubarak

38 notes · View notes