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silverskye13 · 9 months

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There’s a saying: Character is what you are in the dark. Its meaning is simple. Anyone can be a hero when the world is watching. When the world isn’t, when you could get away with murder or mercy and it wouldn’t matter, when there is no one to point and judge… that matters. That is the measure of your humanity.

Helsknight is sharpening his sword. He has been sharpening his sword, alone in his home, for over an hour. It was already sharp when he started. The edge hasn’t seen enough wear to be anything but. It’s been days since his last bout in the Colosseum. He made a ruthlessness of himself there, in front of hundreds -- thousands of people. He shouldn’t have done that. He remembered the showrunner criticizing him as he fled down the steps into the cells below.

“You could have at least tried to put on a show, Hels!”

He hated when people called him that. Hels. It felt… wrong. The place, hels, was the pit of everything left behind and unwanted. Stuck in some facsimile of the nether, inhabited by the dark unvirtues of a thousand different worlds. The place, hels, wasn’t even important enough to warrant a capital letter. It was a proper noun wasn’t it? A place. Calling it hels made it feel like something lesser, made it feel like a nonplace. Not the World, land. Not a God, deity. Not a living Hels.

He was knighted for a reason.

Knighthood puts a lot of stake by character. Doesn’t matter what kind, really, as long as it follows rules, and Helsknight is good at following rules. Putting order to the universe feels… nice. Like scratching an itch. That’s another good saying: scratching an itch. An itch on the skin is so easy to underestimate. It’s just an itch, until you can’t scratch it. Then it’s agony. Then it’s skin crawling off skin crawling off sinew and bone. An itch can be anything. It can be an allergy, an insect, a mortality. Once his only warning before a respawn in the Colosseum was the itch that told him a hit to the back of his head had gone through his skull instead of skipping off his helm. The itch had been blood running down his neck, before realization and void. Finding order felt like that; the itch from a trickle of blood, felt like scratching the itch and mending the wound.

It’s an interesting exercise in restraint, not scratching an itch. It’s also an exercise in madness, futility, and pain. The itch gets uncomfortable until it hurts. Sometimes it spreads. Your body twitches. You start to convince yourself you’ve never known what it's like to live itchless. You start to feel empathy for people that you’ve never met -- those mystical people with skin diseases or allergic reactions or plant rashes. You start to wonder if pain is really, actually the worst thing you can inflict on someone.

Sometimes, Helsknight itches underneath his skin. That is real madness. An itch so deep even peeling your skin can’t scratch it.

Helsknight takes his sword off the whetstone, holds it up to a lantern to inspect it. The blade is sharp. The netherite is pristine. The enchantments glitter. He tosses it none-too-gently to the floor, listening to the ringing clatter as it tumbles across the floor. One of the tiles chips and goes plinking off like a dropped penny. The netherite stays sharp. It’s a good sword, the kind that feels indestructible. He was told once by a smith that a good netherite sword with the right enchantments can cut through iron like a knife through butter.

Helsknight always has a sharp sword. It’s expected of him. It isn’t a knight’s expectation, not really. Knights do more law keeping in hels than the lawmen, and less dangerously. There’s something to be said about a person in plate armor. No, people just expected Helsknight to have teeth. He couldn’t blame them, when he reacted the way he did on the Colosseum floor. Temperamental people have teeth, get dangerous, and bite. Even people who like him treat him like he’s rabid, only docile and slow right before the lunge. He doubted any of them had ever really seen what a rabid animal is like. Uncanny. Or maybe they had, and that was why they tiptoed like that. Maybe he is uncanny.

Helsknight stands and runs his hands through his hair. He doesn’t like sleeping in this house. It’s too quiet. That’s why he’s awake, sharpening his sword, but it doesn’t feel right staying in the Colosseum cells. Unwelcome. People talk about him, or they don’t. It’s hard to tell. People just kind of… fall silent. Paranoia dictates they’re talking about him. A rabid animal itching in its skin longs to bite and spread the disease. They watch him like he’s about to bite.

He doesn’t know how to smile, put them at ease. It feels weird on his face. Besides, it’s not expected. Helsknight doesn’t smile. When he does, surely it's a bad thing. Helsknight doesn't talk. When he does, he must be angry. Helsknight carries a sharpened sword. If he doesn't, something is wrong. Helsknight is. Hels isn’t.

Helsknight was knighted for a reason. He’s good at following rules.

Helsknight crosses to his lantern and turns out the light. In the dark, he stands alone in an empty room, listening to the world outside, and suddenly very aware of the sword he’s sharped and cast away so carelessly on the floor. He could stand here forever and it wouldn’t matter.

Outside, a group of people laugh uproariously as they walk down the street. It’s night in hels, or a late hour at least. They sound happy. They talk so easily to each other, conversations rolling around hiccups and stutters of joy, rivers running. There truly is still water in hels, nether or not. There’s an itch under Helsknight’s skin.

In the dark, Helsknight wonders if he even exists.

#the barking writer #helsknight #character study #loneliness #kind of #i dunno #vent #kind of?#its been a complicated weekend emotion-wise #sometimes you just feel trapped and lonely you know #i spent too much time as a kid being happy for solitude #now people expect me to enjoy it -- and i'm too awkward to prove them wrong #anyway this is somewhat inspired by sleep token #ya'll cant just drop a phrase like 'im a waking hell and the gods grow tired'#and expect me not to get emo about it every time i have 3 seconds to myself

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chubs-deuce · 11 days

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I want you to know that Dawn has become canon in my mind and I would die for her. I love every single illustration you post!! Your art style is so fun and expressive and really stands out from the crowd in the best way possible.

JHSFKSJH SDLKJHDSLKHF oh my god??

I'm ngl that is one of the most flattering things anyone's ever said about my art Q_Q

Thank you so much!!! I'm ngl while I genuinely like my own art, I do sometimes have moments of insecurity where I feel like maybe the way I stylize these characters is getting a bit out of hand or looks odd, so this was a really nice reminder that in reality, others don't even see it that way qwq

thank you so much for this ask, it genuinely made my day!! <3<3<3

#chubs answers #hhhhh I'm legit so fucking happy people like Dawn as much as they do #and this is actually not even the first time either that someone expressed that she's become lowkey canon to them - I'm fucking mindblown!!#I am genuinely SO appreciative of how much people are enjoying what I put out abt her and engaging so freely with me on that topic too #I didn't expect her to become this whole thing but I've been having so so so much fun messing around with this AU <3 #charlastor fankid #charlastor fanchild #in case someone blocked those tags even tho the fanchild in question is technically only mentioned in passing

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fixfoxnox · 1 year

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With every "Roach is ghosts dead fiance 🥺" or "Roach sent soap for ghost 🥺" I grow stronger. And one day, I will have enough strength to write a purely vindictive fic where SOAP is ghosts dead ex fiance and ghost falls in love with ROACH.

I'm gonna pull a switcheroo on them

Anyways GhostRoachSoap for the win

#listen i'm totally chill with SoapGhost #I myself do enjoy SoapGhost #however i will never enjoy it at the expense of Roach #like genuinely it breaks my fuckin' heart #which coincidentally is why I had to write SiTO #so I could fix things and let Roach get his happy ending #gary roach sanderson #ghost x roach #ghost x soap #also this is definitely a joke I would just appreciate it if people who write those fics would tag them with Past ghost/roach #or #not even tag ghost/roach at all

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cerise-on-top · 4 months

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Could I possibly request Fem!Reader x Laswel where Reader takes Laswel home for the holidays, leaving Laswel a bit of an anxious mess at meeting readers family, but also being endeared by the domesticity of the small holiday party, ending with the pair sitting outside on the porch as the first snow begins to fall?

It's a little cliché but I think it'd be a cute idea ♡

It's very cliché, but not to worry, I made the idea even more cliché and sweet and fluffy by adding some headcanons of my own! It makes me happy to hear there are some Laswell enjoyers out there! I hope you like this, it's also more of a fic than anything else, but it's kind of rushed because I have work again tomorrow ^^; Sorry about that! But thank you for the lovely idea, I was very happy to write that! :D

Laswell Spending the Holidays with Reader and Her Family

It wasn’t an issue, she told herself. Kate had been on missions that relied on her expertise, else the world was going to shatter like glass. There was no anxiety there, she had nothing to fear. If the world was going to end, she knew the right people to call to save it after all. Nothing was bigger than her, nothing could best her, she has been through hell and back several times. And yet, standing in front of the door to your parent’s house, she went through every sort of anxiety there was. Would your parents like her? Was she dressed too casually for the occasion or was she overdressed? Would they accept a lesbian into their home? It was the last question that would prove to be the biggest problem. Normally something like this wouldn’t matter to her, but you were close with your family, Kate had to make sure this would work.

“You ready, Kate?” You looked so adorable in your ear muffs, puffy white smoking forming whenever you exhaled. The scarf you wore suited you well, adorning your lovely jacket. The snow hadn’t fallen just yet, but it was cold regardless. Kate couldn’t help but stare for a second, your big, bright eyes looking back at her with such glee, reassuring her that everything was going to be alright. A small squeeze to her hand was all it took before Kate gave you a warm smile herself. Maybe meeting your family wasn’t such a bad thing after all, you were there too.

“Of course I am. Ready when you are.” And thus you rang the doorbell. A normal sound one would hear just about anywhere. It was then that Kate, for the first time that evening, noticed the quiet Christmas carols playing in the background. The door, too, was covered in decoration. Green and red, a Christmas wreath with an angel on it. A lovely sight. Kate may not have been religious, but it was a nice thought, knowing someone was looking down at you, making sure you were alright. A task she, too, was used to. But it didn’t matter too much, soon enough, the door was opened, revealing a man. He seemed friendly enough, joyful upon seeing you, immediately taking you into his arms.

You didn’t seem too displeased upon seeing him either. Given your difference in age, it must have been your father. A tight hug, sentimental greetings and a kiss to the forehead, everything seemed jolly in that moment.

“Who is it?”

A feminine voice called out. Her question was left unanswered for the most part, her husband giving her no response. He was preoccupied, busy with looking at his daughter he hadn’t seen in a long time. Yet, soon enough, Kate’s anxiety returned as he looked at her. It was dark already, the only reliable source of light coming from the inside. Despite it being somewhat hard to make out his expression, he didn’t seem displeased upon seeing her. “You must be Kate, then? Our girl has told us so much about you. Please, come in! It’s so nice to make your acquaintance!” He let the two of you in. Maybe meeting your family wasn’t such a bad experience after all. They seemed nice. “Honey, it’s y/n and Kate!”

The music inside was something one would, most likely, only hear within a proper and cliched Christmas movie. Even the decoration was a bit much. Tiny trees, underneath them small gifts, an advent wreath with all four candles lit and, of course, a fully decorated Christmas tree, full sized. It had some white decoration on it as well, likely resembling snow to give it even more holiday spirit. From small chocolate umbrellas to windrings, it was all there. Another small angel on the tree, a pretty little golden star on its top. It was the way anyone would expect a Christmas tree to look like. And yet, it felt cozy. Nothing wrong with having the spirit, Kate just wasn’t used to it in the slightest. It had been a while since she was able to celebrate any holiday like that.

Among the pretty lights was another figure that came into view. This one was shorter than your father, likely having been your mother. She stopped for a moment before going in for you as well, giving you a tight hug. Loving words came from her, too. How much she missed you, hoping you were doing well. how you should come visit them more often. How nice, your parents really loved you, no matter what. It warmed her heart even more so than the nicely heated room. Looking around as you and your mother exchanged your greetings, she spotted a big pretzel on the table, filled with all sorts of goodies. Cheese, ham, sausage mayonnaise, tuna, it all seemed to be there.

“Looking forward to the pretzel already, are we?” Your mother joked as she looked at her. The food did look delectable, even if that wasn’t exactly what Kate was looking forward to the most.

Even if she wanted to, Kate couldn’t fight the smile on her face. It was just so domestic, it was a home with a loving family, a lovely daughter and it seemed as though, despite two women being in love, nothing seemed out of the ordinary. You and Kate being together, as long as you were bound by love and joy throughout it all, wasn’t the issue. Perhaps the only issue would have been how much Kate could eat of the pretzel before being too full for another bite. “It looks very delicious ma’am. Did you make it yourself? Or did you order it from the bakery nearby?”

“No need for such formalities. As long as you make y/n happy and take care of her, you’re part of our family. You really don’t have to be that formal with either of us.” Such a thing had been a long time from then and there as well, with most informalities having been left behind in the past. You were just about one of the only more recent exceptions, even if you had known each other for several years. Always, Kate had to be formal, if just to delay another conflict for a few days to make sure help would arrive at the right time. She was family to your mother already, even if she had never met either of your parents. “I’m just glad my daughter has finally found someone she was willing to settle with. She had had a partner before, but that did not go as planned.”

“Mom, for the love of everything that is good and holy, please don’t bring up the past. That was an eternity ago and it’s so shameful!” You sounded indignant upon hearing your mother make such a comment. Sweet and kind you, hiding things from the past, getting embarrassed upon hearing your lovely mother bring them up. “Kate, don’t listen to her, she’s lying to you! Straight up! Through her teeth! Nothing ever happened, everything was always good and always will be!” You crossed your arms, glaring at your mother as you protested. As long as everything was good and alright in the present, that’s all that mattered. Kate was going to make sure it would stay that way too.

Your mother simply chuckled, giving Kate a short but sweet hug, exchanging the pleasantries of giving each other their first names. “Kate, if y/n is ever any trouble tell me and I’ll make sure she’ll learn her lesson.”

“Mom! Stop it!”

“It’s lovely to have you with us, thank you so much for coming. Thank you for taking care of y/n, you know how it is with parents, but you seem like such a nice lady. Please continue to take good care of her, we just want what’s best for her.”

Even as you covered your face with one hand, even as you silently muttered curses under your breath, even as you still smiled as though you had received an expensive gift you had been wanting for years, Kate couldn’t help but laugh a bit. You were flustered beyond compare, no matter how much she wanted to say something about it, maybe tease you about your adorable mannerisms, your quirks, your traits, she decided against it, simply giving you a bright smile instead.

“Mom, if I’m going to be bullied here then Kate and I are going to take our leave and celebrate Christmas elsewhere!” An empty threat, everyone involved knew that much. Even in the heat of your embarrassment, your family did not stop teasing you, your father quipping in here and there as well. Kate hadn’t experienced something like this in a long time, getting to sit back and watch some playful banter. With your father distracting you this time, with your mother coming up to Kate, asking her if she wanted to hear some stories of gone-by times with you being so young, small and ready to take on the world, Kate forgot she was ever even anxious to meet your parents to begin with.

It was your father who would finally begin the tradition, aside from the pretzel, calling your mother and Kate over to the Christmas tree. A few of the presents had already been placed there. Even so, before forgetting, Kate excused herself, rushing to the car in order to get the last one. It was that evening or never.

She had always been a calm person, never letting anything get to her head. When her childhood crush told her how disgusting she was, when her parents belittled her and told her she could change still, when her ex wife left her for reasons she didn’t want to believe, it hurt. But not for long. Every time someone let her down, every time someone hurt her, she knew she was one of the only people she could rely on. God helps those who help themselves. There was no God to her, she had achieved everything on her own. But this time she will have to rely on someone else entirely. Whatever you did, it would shape her future. And thus, she grabbed the box meant for you and headed back inside.

You seemed so cheerful, looking at the jacket your parents bought for you. And, in turn, you parents also looked happy with their presents. Naturally, getting along with them as well as you did, you knew what to get them, even in their later years. It was, all round, just a happy evening, for everyone involved it seemed. Steadying her breath for a second, just as your father turned off the lights, leaving nothing but the Christmas lights on, she stood still, gripping the box tightly. Kate hoped you would like the present she got for you. Yes, you had been with each other for years, but this time was different.

After having taken off the jacket, putting it over one of the chairs nearby, you turned to Kate, eyeing the box she was holding. “Hey, what’s that? Can I see?”

“I’ll let you see it in just a second, dear, alright? Could you please come closer to the tree?”

Your spirit guided you to the location Kate wanted you to be in: Standing next to the tree, illuminated by the red and green lights. Everything else was dark. From a purely aesthetic standpoint, this was perfect. And thus, having taken another deep breath, despite her age, Kate got down on one knee, opening the box so your curious soul could see its contents. “Y/N, will you marry me?”

With you clasping your hands over your mouth, your mother and father gasping as they held onto each other, with Kate watching you closely as the tears started brimming in your eyes. The lights were reflected so beautifully in your eyes, dancing across, giving them the most vibrant colors in the universe. But you were stunned into silence, removing your hands only to mouth some words that could never reach Kate in the state you were in. The Christmas charm seemed to have worked, you were out of your mind with joy, but unable to say anything about it.

A sob escaped you as you slung your arms around Kate, tightly holding onto her. You weren’t going to lose her, not that easily anymore, you were both here to stay. “Yes! Fuck, Kate! Of course I’m going to marry you! I love you! I love you so much, you have no idea!!” Your tears stained the blouse she chose for the evening, but it didn’t matter. All Kate wanted was to hold you, love you, cherish you, through thick and thin, through the good and the bad. All she wanted was to spend the rest of her days with you and no one else. Kate got her present, the biggest one she could have ever wished for: Your “yes”.

Your parents were also quiet for a moment, allowing you to cry into Kate’s shoulder. But from what she could see, they were shocked, but happy for their girl. She was going to get married after so many years. And that to the woman of her dreams she never really could shut up about whenever they were talking. It was a lovely sight. Soon enough, you were both officially going to be a part of each other’s family, bearing each other’s names so no one would ever mistake you as anything else but each other’s wife.

You bit back a sob, your voice still cracking as you asked Kate a small favor: “Can we please go outside for a bit? I think I need a moment here.”

“Of course, anything for you.” Kate handed you your new jacket before she grabbed her own. Naturally, as she wanted it to be, you led the way to the backyard, holding Kate’s hand. Despite it being dark, despite the only light coming from other Christmas decorations and you not having been here in a while, you found a bench in the middle of the small piece of land immediately. The two of you sat down, Kate having slung an arm over you as you kept sobbing for another moment. Nothing could have prepared her for you being so over the moon to hear the big question, but she wasn’t complaining.

It took you another minute or two to finally compose yourself, but you got there eventually. “You know, I always thought I was never going to find someone, preferring girls over guys and all. Age wise, you and I aren’t that far apart either, so you know how long I’ve been carrying that thought, that belief, with me now. But then I found you and…” You went quiet again for another second. Kate rubbed your back, hoping it would soothe you a bit. “...and now this. Kate, you don’t know how happy I am right now. To think that someone would think me, of all people, to be worth loving. To be worth marrying. You’re something else.” You grabbed her hands so tenderly, giving them a gentle squeeze as you looked into her eyes. “Thank you so much, for everything. I am so happy, so glad I get to spend the rest of my life with you.”

“Y/N, as you know, I’ve been through a lot. I’ve seen the best and worst of humanity, but nothing could ever best you. I would go through this entire hell again and again, if just to spend another moment with you. Getting to spend the rest of eternity with you is more than I could have ever asked for. Thank you for allowing me to be by your side.”

Just as you leaned in, sealing this beautiful evening with a kiss, something small landed on Kate’s nose. You giggled a bit, looking to the sky for a moment, then back at your soon-to-be wife. “Even the sky is weeping with joy right now. Isn’t that sweet?”

“Of course it is. Anyone would be happy for us right now, dear.”

Interrupted by the small snowflake, you gave it no mind, placing a small, tender kiss on Kate’s lips as you were. The snow looked beautiful in her hair. Winter didn’t seem so dreadful and cold anymore, it was a hopeful time you could remember for more than just seeing a part of your family. Another part was right there with you, forever and always, after all.

#cod #cod x reader #kate laswell #kate laswell x reader #fem!reader #petition to make Laswell real so us Laswell lovers can give her a kiss on the cheek #I never would have thought I'd be into older women but I am swooning again #it's sort of become a habit of mine to write something like a fic for the girls #I need to change that but every time I look at one of them I am overcome with love and adoration and the desire to write as much as I can #I need to go back to writing HCs but that's likely only going to happen when writing for the guys and/or if there's several characters #anyway the girls are so underappreciated in this fandom I am so happy to have found the people willing to enjoy my silly writing about them #also English is not my first language so I'm really sorry for any mistakes #I have a hard time remembering the difference between looking down on and looking down at sb

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uhbasicallyjustmilex · 10 months

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ARCTIC MONKEYS 25/06/23

okay now that i've had some time to (slightly) emotionally and physically recover from yesterday, i need to flail about the highlights:

1) meeting one of my absolute favourite humans who i would never have got to know if it hadn't been for this little corner of tumblr - and then getting to share the excitement/nerves/elation/exhaustion rollercoaster of seeing am with them was just - there aren't even words for it. so special 💖

2) learning how to navigate rain ponchos

3) impulse buying too much merch (but also not regretting it. the glasgow tour poster is going to be the first thing going on my wall in my new flat)

4) the mirrorball starting to twirl just before they all came onstage and sending the colours of the afternoon sun everywhere

5) the sheer rush of the moment they all walked onstage together (also that was pretty much the only time i got to glimpse nick and matt at all 💔 from where i was standing i could mostly only see alex and jamie)

6) seeing alex a few metres away in real life after months of looking at his beautiful, dorky little expressions in photos/videos was surreal in the best possible way- there's just something so different about the way you get a sense of someone's energy when you're in the same space with them?? and as someone who's endlessly interested in people, i'm fascinated by how alex simultaneously gives off really reserved, self-contained vibes at the same time as being such a dynamic and captivating performer - like he’s so good at tapping into emotions without letting them be a door into how he’s actually feeling (if that makes any sense, my post-gig brain is not very articulate) i guess that all very much makes sense with all the stuff he's said about personas/performing, but it was still so interesting to get to really feel that sense of his presence in live time. he's definitely very much in control but in a very understated kind of way

7) a bunch of birds circling overhead on one side of the crowd, alex seeing them and dramatically declaring 'release the rest of the birds'

8) me and the lovely human i went with turning to each other with expressions of sheer joy when the opening bars of crying lightning were played (and don't sit down. and four stars. and arabella. and - you get the picture. getting to share the sheer delight of your favourite songs being played is just the loveliest feeling 💗)

9) alex doing a quirky little 'ha ha' laugh in the middle of body paint

10) mirrorball coinciding with the most beautiful pink dusk and half moon just above the stage, and getting to witness alex’s piano playing at the start of it

11) body paint. just. body paint. i think my soul left my body.

12) how much energy and enthusiasm alex seemed to have throughout the set - especially after the last week or so it was just the loveliest thing to see him messing about and having fun. and his voice sounded SO good. how anyone manages to sing like that (let alone sound like that less than a week after cancelling shows due to laryngitis) is an absolute mystery to me

13) alex's theatrical hand gestures for crying lightning (the one for gobstopper was a particular favourite)

14) hearing 505 when dusk has just fallen and you can see the smudged moon behind the deep indigo clouds is the only way anyone should ever hear 505

15) alex and matt having a giggle about something mid set

16) obviously i was aware of how stupidly talented they all are - but there's something about seeing it unfold in front of you in real time that makes it really hit you. the sound wasn't great where i was for some of the time so i don't feel like i got the best audio sense of everything, but i was just so struck in particular by matt on the drums and also alex with his guitar playing. i feel like when i'm just listening to their records i'm so busy listening to alex's voice that i forget how incredible a guitar player he is and - wow. just. yeah. it honestly took my breath away.

17) getting the distinct impression that it provides alex with a sense of amusement to deliberately do that thing where he sings the lyrics at slightly different speeds to trip the crowd up

18) even though i ended up being in significant pain for the second half of the set and had to go find somewhere a little further back where i could lean against the railings (chronic pain conditions and standing for 6+ hours apparently isn't the best mix), nothing could dull how magical it was hearing all the tracks from the car that they played closer to the end. standing there in the dusk and feeling so much about everything is something i'll never forget. it truly brought home to me so poignantly everything about why am's music means so much to me and how much love i have for them 💜

19) being in the exact line of direction alex blew kisses to at the end

20) the hazy post-gig walking in the dark under lit up green trees with the lovely human i went with and our conversations about am and creativity and the courage of sharing music 💖

#i'm honestly still processing the fact that it really happened #it was amazing #though i'm trying not to be frustrated with myself for my chronic pain kicking in when they were on #i had a couple of songs where i was like 'why can't i just enjoy this like a normal person'#but then the music took over and brought me back to myself #so yes #i wish i'd been feeling amazing for all of it #but it was still amazing even if i wasn't feeling amazing for every second of it #and i'm so so happy i went and got to share it with such an amazing human #💜#i’ve been swinging between riding a high and post gig blues all day so forgive me if any of this is incoherent #also #i know these photos are blurry as hell but i’d still appreciate it if people don’t repost them without my permission #arctic monkeys #alex turner #matt helders #jamie cook #nick o'malley #am glasgow 2023 #lulu posts

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svnflowermoon · 6 months

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i am so unexplainably sick of things being called basic as if that's a bad thing. so what if someone listens to mainstream music and makes aesthetic instagram posts and watches popular tv shows because if that makes them happy then it's no one else's business. focus on yourself rather than putting other people down for doing what makes them happy.

#luc posts #there is a reason “basic” things are popular: they make people happy #like those girls who say they're a girls girl and then say shit like “omg i cant believe they listen to taylor swift thats so basic of them #like do you actually think these people give a fuck??? if listening to taylor swift makes them happy then so what??? why is that a problem?#its almost as if humans hate seeing other humans successfull and happy #I'm not saying you have to like mainstream things #but just be happy for people who do #bc at the end of the day if you make fun of someone for doing what makes them happy then you're a horrible person #let people live #let people enjoy things #let people have fun #let people be happy #someone liking stranger things or another mainstream tv show is genuinely not deep enough to bully them for you're wasting ur time #like really underground niche interests are cool ofc but that DOES NOT make you better than anyone else #happiness #came out of my studying tumblr “break” to post this lmao

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mister13eyond · 2 months

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talking to a friend about getting back into art and i think the #1 most important piece of art advice i could ever get or give is just "figure out what is FUN to you"

like i think there is sooooo much emphasis on how to build SKILL in art but a lot of it really treats art like a job or like video game grinding, like it's this thankless job that you have to work at in order to reach a Threshold and i know it's not EASY to make yourself have fun but like

imo a solid 70% of the reason i create art is because the Act of Drawing is fun to me. it's fun problem-solving and planning and putting down lines and playing with colors and tools. it's fun to depict little scenes in my head or to create outfits or to find ways to fill the canvas. never forget that creating can be fun. sometimes it's hard and sometimes you have to battle through your own blockades to get there but the ultimate goal should always be to ENJOY it, to find what you enjoy doing and then do it forever. improvement will follow enjoyment.

i think especially with all the debate about ML image generation it's more important than ever to embrace FUN. if you're only focused on the end result it's so easy to get in your own head- to think about what doesn't look good or what skills you don't have yet or to compare yourself to other artists. but photography didn't kill the art of drawing and AI won't either because, simply put, there will always be people who want to do the physical act of making art because it's fun to do! using paints and markers, splashing colors around, doing shitty pen doodles, using the symmetry tool in your art program to do abstract mandalas that are just squiggles formed into patterns. do art like you're 5 and you've been handed markers to pass the time. do art like you're bored in class and you're keeping your brain entertained by drawing stick figure comics in the margins. do art like an absent thing, do art because it satisfies your brain. the goal is not to make something beautiful and perfect, the goal is to make something because your hands need to make and your body needs to make.

#i know and love so many people who have intense anxiety about their ability to create art and who are so hard on themselves about the result #and i think that's a REALLY easy thing to feel because creating is also vulnerable & physically difficult and there is SOOOO much to master #but i think for me the people who churn out 300 colored pencil front facing hands behind their backs oc doodles on lined notebook paper-#are the ones with the right idea. they're the ones i aspire to be like #i'm not saying i never struggle either bc tbh #as someone with depression and adhd there are times where the Act of Having Fun is simply not possible #sometimes i CAN'T enjoy things because my ability to feel joy is locked behind a barrier of my mental illness #so i don't think it's an Easy thing to do by far and I don't think you can just Magically Make Yourself Happy And Having Fun #but i DO think that experimenting in a low-stakes low-pressure manner until you find something that clicks in your brain helps #doing things for the sake of doing them is the only way to figure out which ones WILL be fun to you #not all of them will. some things will feel like a slog #but i think you have to look for the passion before you're able to face the slog #if you jump right into the parts that are Hard and Challenge Your Limits it's easy to spin your wheels and get stuck #but if you focus on the super small stakes and the things that are thoughtless and focused more on Sensation-#the sensory experience of mixing paint or the scratch of pencil on paper or the smooth way a specific pen makes lines-#then you can lose yourself in the physical aspect of it FIRST #and then once you've started really ENJOYING those sensations you can start learning new ways to use them #because now you have the drive to want to do more #now you have the desire to find new ways to apply this thing you like doing #long post #even longer tags #art #drawing #artists #art advice

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