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somekindofpoet · 11 months

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Missed Connection 6

Summary: A flight delay causes a chance meeting between R and Jenna Ortega

Word Count: 4.2K

Warnings: 18+ NSFW! smut, language

A/N: I'm aware the Barbie timeline doesn't match up but tbh it was so funny I couldn't not do it. I stayed up way too late writing and editing this so there are 100% going to be mistakes here. Heed the warnings above...happy Pride month you filthy animals <3

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

A stack of papers is slapped on the desk in front of you, the force of it fluttering your hair. Jenna’s hand is on your lap, gripping your fingers tight.

Sam’s office is larger than you thought it’d be, more extravagant. Proof of her success hangs on the walls, degrees, photos of her clients, a picture of her with Obama. It smells like leather and jasmine, and it screams prosperity right in your face.

Clearly, Sam is excellent at her job. Which is probably why she’s fuming right now.

“Have you two seen this?” She asks, gesturing at the stack of papers.

You wince, glance down at the top page. You fight with all your might not to snicker. Jenna’s fans were clever and bloodthirsty. You succeed in not laughing, but as soon as Jenna sees the photograph, she snorts, quickly covering her mouth, her eyes wide and apologetic.

The pages are screenshots of memes from Twitter and Instagram. The top one is a photo mimicking the new Barbie movie posters of her and Ken’s mugshots. The problem? The faces have been replaced. With yours and Jenna’s.

Jenna’s photo is brilliant, possibly one you took from the Met Gala. She’s smiling from ear to ear, looking proud of herself. Above the photo is her name, and below it, in the photoshopped mugshot board, the text says ‘UNDERAGE DRINKING’.

Yours is your actual mugshot, and you’re half amused, half furious that someone dug it up. Your name is above the photo, and on your mugshot board it says ‘ASSAULT’. It’s amusing, but the funniest part is the tweet attached to it.

“Y/N could assault me any day, no one’s blaming you Jenna babe!”

When the screenshot was taken, there were over 300k responses to it. You’re sure that number has tripled now.

Jenna reaches over, her eyes bright with curiosity, and flips to the next page. It’s filled with replies, most of them agreeing with the original tweet. When you see the one at the bottom of the page, you lose your battle to remain collected and join Jenna in her giggling.

“Jenna better be careful. Y/N has an assault charge and she can fuck it up, I can tell. If I were her I’d be extra protective of my pus-“

You don’t get to finish reading it because Sam slaps her hand over the page, glowering at you.

“Oh come on, Sam,” Jenna says between laughs, “they’re so funny!”

Sam’s expression doesn’t change, “They’re vulgar, and it’s hurting your image.”

You glance at Jenna, your laughter quickly quelled by Sam’s irritation. She huffs and slouches back in her chair, her hand pulling away from yours to shrug.

“Change my image then.”

Sam presses her fingers over the bridge of her nose, an action you’ve deemed to be her signature move when she’s speaking to Jenna.

“The goal was to avoid the child star gone wild trope, J. You’re killing me.”

“Sam, please,” Jenna scoffs, dropping her arm to rest behind your shoulders, “it’s not like I’ve gone full Miley. Maybe it’s time the world realized I’m an adult now.”

Jenna’s arm over your shoulder and her fingers softly grazing your back through your shirt have you entirely distracted. It’s been a week since you confessed your crimes to her, and you’ve been practically inseparable since. She worked with Sam, and they chose to post a photo of the two of you to her Instagram, casually announcing your relationship.

Since then, the internet and the media have exploded. It didn’t take long for the tabloids to publish your rap sheet, but luckily Sam had a plan for that. The day your misdeeds were printed, a ‘mysterious’ leak was also posted about why you had an assault charge. The large media groups tried everything they could to scold Jenna for dating you, but her fans went absolutely feral for you.

So feral, Sam was worried it was getting out of hand. Hence the meeting in her office.

“J, your mother is going to actually murder me. And you can kiss any teen movies goodbye,” Sam says, pulling the papers back toward her as she notices you eyeing them again.

Jenna nods, “That’s fine with me. I don’t want to play sixteen-year-olds anymore. And you don’t work for my mom, you work for me. I’m sure she’ll love Y/N when she meets her.”

You blink hard, gulping at the thought of being introduced to Jenna’s family. Luckily she’s too focused on Sam to notice your nervousness.

Sam sighs, “You’re right, I work for you. So I’m telling you, we need to do something to get them off this,” she gestures at the pictures, “and on to the next thing.”

“What do you have in mind?” Jenna asks, leaning forward with interest.

Sam scratches her chin, “Not sure yet. But I’ll call as soon as we come up with something. Until then, please, for the love of god, keep it PG.”

You can tell Jenna wants to fight her on that point, so you rest your hand on her knee, coaxing her down. She glances at your hand, biting her lip. Looks over at you and nods at Sam.

“Fine, PG. Got it.”

Sam eyes you warily, “And you?”

You frown, taken aback, “What about me?”

“PG, understand? No funny business, no brawls-“

“Sam!” Jenna exclaims, but you smile and squeeze her leg gently.

“I understand. These hands will remain inside the car at all times.” You say, lifting your hands to show Sam your palms.

She narrows her eyes at you. You can’t tell if she’s fighting a smile or if she wants to strangle you. Probably a bit of both, you figure.

“Alright, go on then,” Sam flips her hands at you, shooing you both out of her office.

The minute you’re in your car, Jenna is pulling you over the center console, her lips practically fused to yours. The last week consisted of several dates, a lot of kissing, and some heavy petting, but you hadn’t had sex yet.

You both agreed to take things slow, especially after the background check mishap. But it was becoming exceedingly difficult, especially when every touch caused both of you to jump into overdrive.

You pull back, and Jenna whimpers, her arms still tight around your neck. It takes everything in you not to lean back in, not to crawl into the passenger seat and strip her down, paparazzi be damned. But you promised Sam, and you’ve already done enough to tarnish Jenna’s good girl reputation.

You chuckle, press a quick kiss to her pouting lips, “We promised to keep it PG.”

She pouts harder, allowing you to pull yourself a little further out of her grasp, “What if I had my fingers crossed?”

Her sulking makes you really laugh, shaking your body with giddiness, “I would not be able to sleep at night if I knew your mother might see pictures of us having sex in the car on the streets of Hollywood, Jenna.”

Her expression lights up, her fingers trailing down your arm igniting goosebumps on your skin, “So you were considering it, though.”

Your eyes widen, you shake your head, “No…I…uh.”

She quirks a brow at you, her smile telling you she sees right through your mumbling.

You drop your head, smiling bashfully, “It may have crossed my mind.”

A full smile breaks across her cheeks, her dimples on full display. You know your eyes must be something close to pitch black at the sight, your mind subconsciously trying to take in as much of the image as physically possible. She leans back in her chair, still smiling, pulling your hand into her lap as you drive away from the curb.

You’re anxious to get home, the promise of a movie night on your mind—the possibility of moving your relationship a little faster even more present.

There’s tension crackling between the two of you the entire drive back, unspoken but understood. When you lead her into your front door, you’re half expecting to be shoved onto the nearest horizontal surface. It may have happened, too, if not for Mr. Burton.

The second Jenna walks through the door, he comes bounding off his shelf, his black tail held high, and his ears pricked up. The cat had fallen for her, he seemed to enjoy her even more than he tolerated you. It would make you jealous if it weren’t so damn cute.

“Mr. Burton!” Jenna cries out, scooping him up and holding him on his back like a baby.

He purrs happily, pressing his head into her chest, his front paws curled under his chin. You’ve never seen him so docile. It makes you laugh softly, earning a glare from both Jenna and the cat.

“Don’t laugh at him,” she says, “he’s just a baby. Aren’t you?”

He meows on cue, and it’s enough to make you roll your eyes and leave them in the entry way. You settle into your couch and turn on the tv, flipping through apps and searching for something good to watch. It’s only noon, but you had no other plans, so a movie sounded like the perfect way to spend the afternoon close to Jenna.

She carries Mr. Burton into the living room and delicately places him on his cat tree with a kiss on the top of his little head.

“I think he loves you more than me,” you say, feigning irritation, but your soft smile gives you away.

Jenna curls into your side on the couch, smiling triumphantly, “Of course he does.”

You gaze down at her, “Can’t blame him, I guess.”

She wraps her arm around your waist and rests her head on your shoulder, “What’re we watching?”

Your cursor hovers over the Scream franchise, “Let’s watch this one.”

“I love the first one!”

“No I want to watch the ones I haven’t seen yet,” you say, squeezing her side.

She shoot’s up, reaching over to steal the remote from you. You hold it out of reach, laughing at her terror.

“We can’t watch those ones, y/n. Seriously! I’ll crawl out of my skin if I have to see myself on that screen.”

“Awh come on J, I haven’t seen them!”

She scoffs, reaches across your body for the remote again, “Absolutely not. Watch them when I’m not here.”

You laugh around your words, teasing her, “No, I like to watch Wednesday when you’re not here. Have you seen her? Good god, she’s sooo-“

“If you finish that sentence, I will walk out of this house.”

She’s fully leaning over you now, still struggling to wrestle the remote from your outstretched arm. It’s cute, watching her struggle, or it was at first. Now she’s in your space, you can smell her perfume, and you’re rapidly losing interest in watching a movie. She realizes her proximity at the same time you do, stopping her struggle to turn and look down at you.

The remote hits the floor when she climbs into your lap, her knees on either side of your legs. Your breathing picks up as your heart begins to pound. Her eyes are dark, her lips parted. She blinks once, so slowly it’s like watching her move in half time.

The tension between the two of you snaps almost audibly, and everything gets very hot, very fast. Her hands are everywhere, her mouth on yours, her body pressing into you. You slide your fingers under her shirt, her skin warm on your palms. When she sighs into your mouth, it’s like you’ve just swallowed absinthe, the way it makes your entire body burn.

Her shirt hits the floor faster than the remote had, and your lips leave hers in favor of her throat. She pulls you into her, pushing her hips forward hard into yours. You both groan at the pressure she’s creating, igniting the pace like gunpowder.

Your kisses grow sloppy, trailing down her neck and over her chest. You’ve both abandoned taking it slow at this point. All you want is fast, fast, fast. Her pants are unbuttoned, and your shirt is halfway off your head when her phone rings.

You slow your movements, glancing over to it, buzzing on the couch next to you.

“Ignore it,” she says, breathless and pulling you back to her lips.

It stops ringing, and you’ve nearly forgotten it because she now has your shirt off and her lips on your neck. And it rings again.

She stops her lips and growls into your skin. The effect the sound has on you is embarrassingly immediate. Your fingers press into her sides, trying to relieve some amount of the pressure building in your lower abdomen.

The phone rings again, and she sighs, sitting up and reaching over to grab it. She stays in your lap, and you sit there dumbstruck, watching her analyze the phone.

“It’s Sam, I’m sorry,” she says, rolling her eyes and answering the call.

When she presses the phone to her ear, the skin of her chest is far too tempting to resist. You lean forward, kissing her there as she drops her head back, not stopping you.

“Hello?” She answers, a little breathy. “Sam, it’s not-“ she gasps as your lips travel to the top of her bra, but she still doesn’t stop you. “It’s not a great time right now.”

The hand that isn’t holding the phone runs across the back of your head, her fingers tangling in your hair and keeping you in place.

“Speaker? Seriously can this wait like, a few hours?”

You pull back, your eyebrows raised. A few hours? The thought sends you into a whole other gear. When you start to lean forward again, she pulls her hand from your hair and places it on your chest, stopping you. You look up, and her face is more serious, she shakes her head.

You want to pout, push your lip out like a child at her self control. Instead, you stay where you are, waiting. Hoping the call ends soon.

It does not. She pulls the phone from her ear and taps the speaker phone button.

“Okay, you’re on speaker, she can hear you,” Jenna says, her tone clearly irritated.

“Great,” comes Sam’s voice, “we’ve come up with the plan.”

When neither of you speak, she carries on, “You’re going to Coachella.”

You frown in confusion. What did Coachella have to do with anything?

“I know, my sisters are coming with me,” Jenna says.

“And so is y/n. It’s the perfect way to get people talking about the two of you, hopefully without mentioning the mugshot. And they’ll get new pictures which should put them off on a new tangent.”

All you heard was that you would be meeting the Ortega sisters. Anxiety courses through you, nervousness at the thought of being introduced to the family. Jenna sees it cross your face and rests her hand on your shoulder, her thumb rubbing your neck. She looks down at you, awaiting your answer.

“Do I have a choice?” You ask, wide eyed and clearly anxious.

“No,” Sam says, “pack your bags. You’re going home, J.”

——

The entire two hour drive to Coachella, you’re a nervous wreck. Your hands sweat, your heart beats wildly, your mind races.

Jenna being in the passenger seat helps, some. She spends most of the ride assuring you her sisters are going to love you. The other parts of the ride, she’s asleep with her hand wrapped in yours and her head knocking into the window every time you hit a pothole.

When you pull into the hotel parking lot, you gently shake her awake.

“Hey, Jenna, we made it.”

She lifts her head, blinking sleepily. She squints out the windshield, eyeing the hotel.

“Mmkay,” she says, then proceeds to rest her head back against the seat and fall asleep again.

You chuckle, your heart growing at least three sizes at the sight of her sleepy face. You turn the car off and climb out, pulling your bags from the trunk and leaving them near the passenger side. You open her door and squat down, shaking her again.

“Hey, sleepyhead. We’re here. Let’s go get checked in.”

She grumbles, yawning and stretching, “Okay, okay. This bed better be as comfortable as your car.”

You finally drag her to the counter, shocked at the lack of a crowd around the hotel. No one knows she’s here yet, or you would have been swarmed on your way in.

You wait close behind her, waiting your run to check in. Once the receptionist pushes over the key cards, Jenna hands them off to you, still bleary eyed. She starts to head for the elevators, but you call after her.

“Are you going to wait for me to get my room?” You ask her.

She frowns, jerking her head back, “You have the key right there.”

You look down at the key, look back at her. The puzzle finally falls into place.

“Oh…oh. We’re sharing a room.”

“Do you not want to?” She asks, running her eye with her knuckles.

“I…I…I mean…if you want to then…I’m okay with it.”

She smiles, rolling her eyes playfully, “Then let’s go.”

You follow her like a puppy on a leash through the hotel lobby and into the elevator. She sways, still heavy with sleep. It’s only 9 PM, but she looks ready to collapse. You pull her into your side, letting her lean into you, and she wraps her arms around your waist, resting her head on your chest.

She beelines straight for the bed before the door even closes in the room. You settle the luggage in the armchair and at the door of the bed and wander to admire the suite.

“This place is so nice,” you say, mostly to yourself.

“Yeah, you can appreciate it tomorrow. Come lay with me, I’m so tired.” Jenna whines from the bed.

You turn and see she’s made herself comfortable over the blankets, resting high on the pillows. She stretches her arms out, reaching for you. Who are you to say no to her?

You kick your shoes off and climb onto the bed, letting her pull you over to lay on her chest. She runs her fingers through your hair, humming quietly.

“Thanks for driving. I don’t think I would have made it.”

You snort, “You were asleep before we even got halfway.”

She hums in agreement again, “Car rides are my weakness, I can’t ever stay awake.”

You don’t respond, just smile. Her shirt is soft on your cheek, her nails scratching lightly at your scalp.

“Are you still nervous about tomorrow?” She asks you.

You close your eyes, nodding against her silently. It’s hard to feel anxious when she’s scratching your head, her heartbeat steady in your ear, and her breathing lulling you into a peaceful relaxation.

“Don’t be anxious, baby, they’ll be nice. I promise.”

Your eyes shoot open, your heartbeat ticking a notch faster. You push yourself up on your elbow, picking your head up to look at her. She smiles curiously at you, trying to figure out what caused you to move.

“What did you just call me?”

Her face turns the most gorgeous shade of pink as she realizes what she’d said. She bites her lip, looking a little unsure.

“Do you not like it? I’m sorry I can-“

You don’t let her finish her apology. You’re on top of her in less than a blink of an eye, your lips on hers in a frenzy. She’s quick to respond, her hands sliding up your shirt and her nails scratching at your back. You sit up and pull the shirt over your head. You don’t plan to slow down, but the look on her face gives you a moment for pause.

She looks perfect. Absolutely, perfectly divine. The freckles across her nose and cheeks, the stray hairs hanging in her face, her soft brown eyes, and her lips. Oh, the things you would do for those lips.

Your admiration is cut short when she pulls you back into her, almost rough in her haste. You’re not sure when her clothes come off, somewhere in between your tongue slipping into her mouth and her lips pressing into your neck. It’s all a lust fogged haze, cloudy in your mind until you’re naked and your stomach is pressed between her legs.

You want to go slow, savor the moment of your first time together. You want to go fast, rush into the ecstasy that is sure to come. Your indecision is dissolved when she rolls you onto your back, taking the control out of your hands.

You think you might be dreaming, when she trails kisses down your ribs, her hands gripping your thighs. Normally, you’d feel uncomfortable being so out of control, but the look in her eyes is enough to keep you planted.

She kisses the inside of your leg, looks back up to lock eyes with you, “Is this okay?” She asks, her voice low.

You gulp, nodding. You can’t trust your voice not to crack, so you keep your mouth shut. But it doesn’t stay that way for long.

You gasp when she presses her lips to your clit, and you nearly black out when she licks an exploratory stripe through you. She wraps her hands around your legs, her hands squeezing the tops of your thighs as she licks you, sucks you. She moans between your legs, and you see stars, your fingers reaching down to intertwine with hers.

It would be embarrassing, how quickly you’re writhing underneath her, if you had the wherewithal to care. But you don’t, and your back is arching off the bed, and your fingers are squeezing hers, and your throat is raw from how heavy your breathing has grown.

You’ve wanted this for longer than you care to admit, and it’s even better than you’d imagined. With a breathy sigh, you’re cumming under the pressure of her mouth, turned to absolute putty in her hands. She kisses her way back up your body and you’re flipping her over before the shivers of your orgasm have even left your bones.

Any inclination to savor the moment is burned away by the flames raging in your stomach. You have to have her. Now.

The kisses you trail down her body are hasty, sloppy, hurried. You’ll enjoy the expanses of her skin later, right now, you only have one thing on your mind.

The sound she makes when your mouth meets her is like the origin of the universe. It’s unexplainable, it’s perfect, and it’s all for you. You want to split apart, give her every piece if she just keeps making those sounds.

Her hands are in your hair, tugging at your scalp. You reach up, your palm running up her arm, asking her to be patient while you enjoy her. Your lips wrap around her clit, and you suck. She lifts her hips into you, seeking more from you. She’s unraveled and greedy, and it’s everything you hoped for and more.

She whimpers when you lift your head to kiss her thigh, hips lifting again, wanting. Your finger dips into her entrance, and you look up at her. Before your eyes even find hers, she’s already nodding, pulling at you. You push a finger in and ascend, your lips crashing into hers as you feel her tight around you. You give her a second before adding another, swallowing her moans when they leave her mouth.

She feels so good around your fingers, you wonder if it’s even possible that she’s enjoying this more than you. But the way she squirms under you, and her nails raking down your back tell the gospel truth of her pleasure.

She jerks her head away, gasping for air. You lick at her pulse, kiss the sweet and lightly salty skin of her neck. Her chest presses up into yours, her nails digging into your skin, her groaning in your ear. Her orgasm is intense and long, and it has her sighing your name between inhales and exhales. It’s the most moving hymn you’ve ever borne witness to. It’s poetry.

She slumps into the bed, and you’re close behind, falling over on her side. You’re both silent for a while, gathering yourselves and slowing your breathing.

After a few minutes, she rolls over, half her body resting on yours. She presses a kiss to your sternum before placing her hand there and eating her chin on it. You smile down at her, still high on your bliss.

“I’m calling you baby every single day from here on out,” she says, her voice practically a sigh.

You lean down, kiss the top of her head, “Clearly, I hate it.”

She giggles, kisses your neck, and sighs again. She settles in on your side, you can feel her eyelashes flutter closed on your skin. Her breathing evens out so fast you’re in awe at how quickly she falls asleep.

You ruminate on the events of the night, hanging on to every detail as long as you can before you’re falling asleep too.

#jenna ortega x reader #jenna ortega x fem!reader #jenna ortega x y/n #jenna ortega #missed connection

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landoslvr · 1 month

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MRS CHRIS | c. dixon

summary: a scroll through your internet presence as 'mrs chris'. [social media AU.]

pairing: fem!reader x chris dixon (chrismd)

faceclaim: eva meloche

notes: first piece for mrs chris out of the wag universe. eva is gonna be the main fc I use for mrs chris, hopefully you like it!

liked by taliamar, faithlouisak and 4,398 others

yourinstagram charity match this week, plus some other fun tidbits

view all 129 comments

user that outfit 🤩

user I knew she was a rhode girly 💅

taliamar soooo pretty 🤍🤍🤍

stephan_tries the only person who is safe from my slander in the commentary box

yourinstagram it's because without me you would've been cancelled a loooooong time ago

stephan_tries best pr manager in the biz

user my idol tbh

user you radiate good energy

chrismd10 another day, another slay 😚

yourinstagram please never speak again

liked by yourinstagram, wroetoshaw and 180,837 others

chrismd10 there's norway this is my job

view all 398 comments

faithlouisak my daughter's gonna see that picture one day

user get y/n on it now!!!

user creating more work for y/n by posting ethan's ass pics

user couple goals 😩💅

user when he makes her job harder 🤩🤩🤩

user chris hitting the glow-up hard 🤤

user y/n knew what his potential was 🤍

user they started dating and he just got hotter??

user that harry shot was lethal 🫣

user sick video 👍🏽

yourinstagram why must you do this to me? do you hate me?

behzinga I'm sorry

yourinstagram I'm letting you go

chrismd10 sorry mate

yourinstagram you're next md

liked by miniminter, chrismd10 and 4,982 others

yourinstagram norway for the week <3 at shoots and scrubbing ass pics from the internet 🫶🏼

view all 187 comments

user she's just so pretty 🫠

chrismd10 good luck with that 🫣

yourinstagram you can explain to olive why her dad's bum is all over the internet one day christopher

faithlouisak aunty y/n would NEVER do that to her beloved neice

yourinstagram my literal baby girl 😭

user y/n drinking wine to ignore her boyfriend and other clients being stupid

user literally every person in the new video, apart from danny, is a part of y/n's client base

user how does she do this shit

user girl has managed to stop HARRY LEWIS from getting cancelled, I'm convinced she can do anything

liked by georgeclarkeey, freyanightingale and 5,019 others

yourinstagram mixing work with pleasure apparently..

view all 213 comments

user EAT HIM UP Y/N

user in the words arthur television: she gagged him

calfreezy send kart 21 down the river

user chris on a ladder is so funny to me 😭

maxbalegde sexy pr lady, come over right NOW, you look too good to not be at my place of residence

yourinstagram be right there xx

user casual london fashion week pic on the 2nd slide x

yourinstagram humble bragging 😩

user I want her life 😭😭

user ikr literally hanging out with all your friends because you manage their image? sign me up

yourinstagram rlly easy guys, just date a famous youtuber and have a media and communications degree xxxx just so easy!!

chrismd10 never forget where you came from.. me

yourinstagram okay mr arsenal bedsheets x

liked by chrismd10, willne and 5,193 others

yourinstagram I got my Greece trip- I mean video... and got to pick which extras to bring along......

view all 287 comments

user quick everyone act shocked that chris is there

user oh my gosh.. no way, chris? I am so surprised

yourinstagram I appreciate the effort guys 🥲

user she just is that bitch 😭

user you know she's got every single one of those men wrapped around her finger

arthurtv i wasn't one of the chosen ones 💔

yourinstagram because im tired of you and chris sharing a bed and me sleeping on the hotel couch

chrismd10 foiled again arthur

calfreezy send me this pic you traitor

user pr manager/photographer

yourinstagram I need a pay rise

chrismd10 thanks for stowing me away in your suitcase xx

user she's mothering I love it

user so hot

user major fitty ❤️‍🔥🤩

taliamar so true

liked by yourinstagram, freyanightingale and 178,399 others

chrismd10 constantly reminding me who she is in that first photo. happiest of birthdays to my pr manager and nothing else!

view all 412 comments

user happy birthday y/n the pr manager!!

user a y/n photo dump is my favourite kind!!

user spoil us chris!!

wroetoshaw happy birthday y/n!

faithlouisak my wife's birthday 🤩

ksi happy birthday to the goat

user chris and y/n be sappy challenge

callux the queen! happy birthday!!

vikkstagram happy birthday mrs chris!! thanks for everything

yourinstagram thank your lucky stars you posted all nice pictures or I would've deleted your youtube channel xxxx

user Y/N PLEASE 😭

#chrismd x reader #chrismd #chris michael dixon #chrismd imagine #chrismd oneshot #cel's social media aus #chris dixon x reader

216 notes · View notes

romiyaro · 1 year

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ᴘʀᴀɴᴋ #3 "ꜱᴇɴᴅɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ɴᴜᴅᴇꜱ" !!!

CW: nudes¡ suggestive language¡ mentions of sex¡

Pairing: (all post timeskip) suna, atsumu, osamu, ginjima x gn!reader

Network: @tokyometronetwork

ꜱᴜɴᴀ ʀɪɴᴛᴀʀᴏ

Guaranteed returns. All favors are returned x1000.

Send him a partial nude and you will get a dick pic within 3 milliseconds. Send him a thirst trap and an audio capture of him moaning your name is sent back.

Suna prides himself on his ability to collect quality material, so it's no surprise he's so very enthusiastic about this nudes exchange business.

Has pretty lights set up around his room just for the sake of clicking aesthetic dick pics.

There's even a special folder on his desktop dedicated to you. All these frisky pics and videos are stored there. He even names it his 'personal pornhub'

Comes home with hundreds of nasty fantasies filled in his head. Trust me he's created a very nice simulation of all the things he'd love to do to you.

ᴍɪʏᴀ ᴀᴛꜱᴜᴍᴜ

You just know this motherfucker is choking on his spit every time you send a pic that's even closely revealing.

This one time you send him a suggestive (only to dirty minded people) picture of your newly done nails holding your glass just for fun and next day videos of Miya Atsumu, star athlete clumsily fumbling with his phone are trending on the internet.

I'm really really sorry for this one but he totally responds in Adam Levine style😭😭😭 he's embarrassing you know it but you love him and that shitty replying style is something you and him have to work on.

He comes home all needy and whiny after that. Needs all the love and affection— much much more than usual.

He might not admit it but every time his phone pings and it's a message from you he pulls in a deep breath to stabilize his heart and be ready.

Atsumu is too much of an innocent boy for that cocky front he puts up.

ᴍɪʏᴀ ᴏꜱᴀᴍᴜ

Now this guy is a totally different story. Unlike his brother, although equally cocky, he has the guts to back it up.

You once sent him a nude while on a double dinner date just to see his reaction and this mf looked at the picture and smirked, licking his lip. Never tell him how flustering you found it you'd just be digging your own grave.

He's an observant guy, he knows all your preferences– from the food to the positions, so it's not a huge surprise to you when he sends you detailed, nasty, toe-curling replies.

Lowkey think he could run his own pornblog and we would still follow him like dick hungry bitches.

Sometimes, he would send you unprompted random messages while you are at work. Like sirrrr, you get it. He knows you very well but it's none of his business to ensure you're melting in your chair at work thinking about him.

But that's not all. The real nastiness starts when you return home, or his hotel. This man is filthy. And he's gonna pull you down with him whether you like it or not.

ʜɪᴛᴏꜱʜɪ ɢɪɴᴊɪᴍᴀ

You were sorely mistaken if you thought he was an innocent baby boy who had to be introduced to the art of sending nudes gently💀💀💀

He is the devil. This man laughs at you and calls you weak when you send him a partial nude.

The insult digs deeper when he sends you a beautiful, Pinterest worthy image of his pants pulled down just enough to show his perfect v-line. The sunlight kissing his pretty skin doesn't help either.

This ensues a nudes war. Who can click the better nude.

You both give each other occasional runs for your money. But it's usually him powning you most of the time. This guy has some serious aesthetics.

But the funny thing is, although you both forget the original intention of sending nudes, you both develop a cute and adorable sort of bonding activity out of it.

Lost the taglist so i won't tag anybody and this isn't gonna be a regular writing phase anyways so🙏🙏🙏 also drop some holy water in the comments and reblogs plej i need it I've been thinking very nasty thoughts abt a certain white haired sensei from naruto

#miya atsumu x gn!reader #miya osamu x gn!reader #suna rintaro x gn!reader #hitoshi ginjima x gn!reader #atsumu x reader #atsumu x gn!reader #osamu x reader #osamu x gn!reader #suna x reader #suna x gn!reader #ginjima x reader #ginjima x gn!reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu smut #haikyuu suggestive scenarios #haikyuu x gn!reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu fluff

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mysillyside · 2 months

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(The first arc of the Death Note anime takes place in 2006-2007, around the time LOLcats became a thing. So I had a vision.)

Task Force Groupchat

L: gentlemen

L: this cat. is literally me

Matsuda: HAHAHAHAHA that's so funny Ryuzaki!!! :-) That cat is so cute!!!

Soichiro: I DON'T UNDERSTAND. MATSUDA-SAN CAN YOU PLEASE EXPLAIN WHAT THIS MEANS.

Matsuda: It's a LOLcat! They are these funny images of cats people post on the internet. :-)

Aizawa: Ryuzaki can you not use the Task Force groupchat to send pictures of these "LOLcats". It's not professional.

Soichiro: I HAVE TO AGREE WITH AIZAWA-SAN. WE SHOULD FOCUS ON THE INVESTIGATION. DOES ANYONE KNOW HOW TO MAKE THE LETTERS LOWERCASE.

Mogi: *is typing*

L: i look like this now good job

Light: You're a grown man.

L: maybe light-kun should try having fun for once in his life. he currently lacks a sense of humor i'm afraid

Light: I have fun when it's appopriate. I fail to see how me finding your cat pictures juvenile during a police investigation where I'm being falsely accussed of mass murderer is me "lacking a sense of humor".

L: light-kun reminds me of this cat

*Light has left the chat*

#death note #l lawliet #light yagami #touta matsuda #soichiro yagami #shuichi aizawa #kanzo mogi #lolcats #🤪 sillygoofy #💬 katposts #✒️ katwrites

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co-reborn · 1 year

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WYR-0525: Good Little Student Wang Yiren Is Secret Porno Slut! Couldn't Resist Fuck During Office Hours With Teacher, Multiple Orgasms Spanking Doggy Style Sex Party!

Yiren x Male Reader

view in AFF

4,246 Words

A/N: Powered through writing this for @praeluxius and special thanks to him and @sinswithpleasure for helping beta-read this fic.

A/N2: Potential TW in terms of dubious consent for a certain part of the fic. I do not condone doing it IRL.

Funny how Wang Yiren has such a strong passion for the camera. The shot of her face when you take her attendance always reminds you of the many times you’ve seen her on the internet long before she became your student. You didn’t want to believe it at first but everything about her felt so familiar. You try to ignore her online persona as much as you can. She distracts you enough outside of class and you can’t have her be a distraction in class too.

Your eyes linger a little too long after you mark her as present. An hour and a half ago, she was dressed all prim and proper. Now at the end of class, Yiren looks like a complete mess. Her top is haphazardly buttoned and her face is flushed with stray hairs sticking to her forehead. You know that look. You can tell what she has been doing during your online class.

Block out any stray thoughts and focus on what’s on hand right now. You finish class with final reminders about other assignments and soon after, your students begin to leave the call. Only one remains. Yiren doesn’t say anything, just navigating her screen before she makes eye contact with you through the screen.

Immediately, your phone receives a notification. The website icon gives you a hint on what it’s about and you tense up for a second. When you look back at your monitor, you’re alone in the online classroom. You heave a sigh and close the app. Your next lesson is a while away so you busy yourself with some emails and marking of assignments. However, the universe has another plan for you. The notification of your phone stares at you. Ignore it.

You can’t.

You pick your phone up to read it proper—WYR uploaded a new video.

Your monitor cursor automatically finds its way to the bookmark bar and clicks the oh-so familiar webpage. Right at the top of the page it shows the latest video—“Class Time Sex Video For Teacher To Watch!”. You check the video length. Thirty minutes. Lunch break ends in an hour. You can finish lunch in fifteen minutes, you have time to spare. Your cursor hovers over the thumbnail. Just click away.

You almost give in to that voice in your head. The video preview starts playing. It shows Wang Yiren’s near-naked body. She has posted several intimate videos on this blog from months prior to being in your class and you hate to admit that you watched every single one of them. Your fingers tremble and ultimately, you go against your morals and get ready to watch the latest release.

The video starts off simple as always—an up-close image of her cute face smiling at her viewers. You’re thinking to yourself, ‘Fuck, she’s so goddamn pretty’. Yiren is easily the cutest student you have come across and if you were her classmate, you’d die to date her.

However, when she takes a step back and you see the manner she’s dressed in, your thoughts change to ‘Fuck, she’s so goddamn hot’. Her uniform top, the same one she was wearing earlier in your class, is halfway undone and she’s giving you a peek down to her cleavage. That sight remains on your screen for the next few minutes, you aren’t exactly sure how long. She stayed in the position for some time, undoing the rest of the buttons and pulling the top open repeatedly in a teasing fashion, plus you couldn’t resist rewinding those few seconds several times.

Then, Yiren takes another step back and turns around. When she leans forward, her skirt lifts just enough for you to see her cheeks peek from below it. Her hands reach for the side of the skirt and an audible zip later, it drops to reveal her skimpy pink panties. You pause the video to take the moment to properly admire her half-clothed ass, even spotting the outline of her pussy. Letting the video continue playing, you watch Yiren pull her panties down her legs. She’s already wet and definitely needy for some action. She follows up by teasing the camera with shakes of her ass mixed with her hands running all over the pristine white skin.

Meanwhile, you’re obsessed with the thought of what it would be like if you were next to her. Digging your fingers into her fine little ass would send you into a frenzy. You wouldn’t stop there. There’s more to enjoy than groping her. You want to spank that ass and ruin the perfect white with red hand marks. That will truly drive you insane.

As if she can predict your thoughts, what comes next is a series of soft slaps accompanied by her soft yelps. Yiren is slapping her own ass, although you would be rougher than that if you had the chance, and the first few moans of the video already have you twitching and leaking. This continues for the next minute or so, her slaps gradually increasing in strength, causing her ass to grow redder.

Yiren then turns back to the camera and smiles as she takes a seat. Slowly, she spreads her legs and your eyes are glued to the screen. You want to get a proper look at her crotch but her hands are covering the view, as if she knows exactly what you want. Keeping up the painfully slow movement, her fingers run across her soaking pussy lips before she fully exposes herself to the camera.

Yiren picks up a dildo off her desk and she winks when she presses the dildo against her entrance. Anticipation is at its peak. You’re staring intently at the screen and waiting for your student to begin fucking herself. Unfortunately, she draws out the moment further by circling the toy around her clit.

You do not have the time nor the patience to watch Yiren tease herself so you spam the arrow key to skip ahead. One click too many and you barely catch the sight of her inserting the last inch of the toy into her pussy. She then pulls it out and her juices staining the toy causes it to glisten. A split second later, the dildo is buried deep inside her one more. In and out the toy goes, a seemingly endless cycle that you’re so accustomed to watching such that you can “watch” with your eyes closed.

You stroke yourself at the same pace as Yiren fucking herself. You wish to be the one fucking her and your mental image slowly shifts.

She’s lying on her back and already spreading her legs. She’s wearing that same “fuck me” look she loves to put on in her videos and beckoning you to get closer to her. You’re pounding her fast and hard and the next thing you know, Yiren has her arms and legs wrapped around your neck and waist. She pulls you into her and you hear her every gasp and moan.

“Faster. Harder.”

You’re fully unaware of how long the video has been going for and eventually, the moaning comes to a temporary pause. You slow your strokes down as well, not wanting to blow your load too early. An abrupt cut later, you’re presented with a new angle.

The dildo is now placed on her chair and Yiren has repositioned herself to face the backrest of the chair. While you’re denied vision to her front, you have the privilege to watch her ass. Her hand steadies herself against the backrest while the other pulls her cheeks apart just enough for the camera to catch the erotic scene. Yiren looks over her shoulder and bites her lips as she sinks downwards onto the toy.

As soon as the dildo is fully in her body, she begins to ride it fervently, not hesitating to vocalise her pleasure. You wish you could watch her face contort in pleasure but you’ll settle for the sight of her ass rippling as she bounces on the chair over and over. If only you get to watch that in the flesh or even experience it for yourself.

You always suppress the thought of fucking her when in class or on campus but in the privacy of your home, your inhibitions no longer hold you back. It would be heaven for Yiren to be on top of your lying figure and riding you. You want to grip her hips and bounce her hard against your cock. You want to fucking use your hot student’s body in any way possible. While your imagination continues to go wild, the pressure in your loins grows as you inch closer to your orgasm.

“Fuck!”

You snap your attention back to the screen when Yiren’s moans grow in volume and frequency. Your eyes are glued to the screen just in time to watch her cum. Her back arches and her head tosses back. Even after she has came, she never stops riding the toy despite the struggle.

By now, you’re more than 20 minutes into the video. You have been edging closer and closer to your peak. Rewind the last few seconds over and over. Watching the sight of Yiren cumming repeatedly is just what sets you off. You cum all over yourself and make a mess of your hands and your crotch. Your eyes shut while the pleasure of your orgasm courses through you and all you can hear is Yiren’s skin slapping on the now-wet chair.

Gently maintain your strokes even when you have stopped leaking while you grab nearby tissue to wipe yourself up. By now, Yiren is facing the camera and is holding her stained dildo. Her tongue circles the girth of the toy as she begins to suck it. If not for the time constraint, you would consider going for a second round.

After you finish cleaning yourself, you look at the video again. The glint in her eyes as she sucks her juices clean off the toy tells you something—she’s not done yet.

Before the video ends, she leans closer to the camera and whispers, “Aren’t I a good little student?”

“Yes, Yiren. Yes you are.”

~~~~~~

An unexpected knock on the door causes you to snap out of your trance and pause the video you were engrossed in.

“Come in.” You shut your laptop and look up.

Oh. It’s her.

Yiren steps into your office. Seeing that she’s wearing the same outfit as that video from days ago, your mind replays clips of her stripping herself, spanking herself, fucking herself. You shake your head and clear the images away.

Standing across the desk from you, she exclaims, “Do you like me?”

You raise your eyebrow, unsure of what she means. She shifts your laptop to the side of your table and lays her bag carefully on it. You frown, confused by her actions. Moving towards your side of the table, Yiren crosses her arms and leans on the edge of your desk, “I mean, sir, do you like watching my videos?”

There’s nothing you can do but sit in confused silence.

“Oh please, I recognise that website icon on your bookmark bar any day of the week.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. In fact, I’m flattered that you watch my videos.” Yiren then places her hands on your shoulders and leans closer to you. “Sir, did you know I started filming myself in the middle of your online classes before?”

You gulp. Of course you remember the times when notifications go off minutes after your class ends and when you watch the videos, she is wearing the very same clothes as during the attendance check. “Y-Yes Yiren.”

“I did that not because I was bored, but because I get so wet whenever I hear your voice. I touch myself thinking about you. I fuck myself imagining it’s your cock I’m riding.”

Your eyes widen at the revelation. Your student lusting after you? This can’t be right.

“I want you, Sir, and I know you want me too. This will be our little secret.”

She finally plants her lips on yours and you immediately reciprocate.

You shut your eyes as you melt into the kiss. Her lips taste so sweet and addictive that it makes you yearn for much more. This isn’t right.

It feels like a match made in heaven. Yiren straddles you and pushes into you to deepen the kiss. Her tongue probes against your lips and you accept it. Immediately, it swirls around yours and explores your mouth. This is wrong.

Your hands roam her body, starting from her thighs up to her waist. So, so wrong.

They continue moving up to her shoulders. You want to wrap your arms around her and pull her tight. Stop now!

Your eyes widen and you push her away instead, trembling while the dilemma of what’s right or wrong sets in. Your last bit of conscience begs you to draw the line and walk away before you make any mistake. Yet where was it all those times when you jerked off to your student’s porn videos and streams and fantasised about fucking her in any conceivable way?

Deep in thought, you don’t even notice that your top is removed. Your body doesn’t register the sudden cold when heat is built up between your legs. The devil is now on her knees. Yiren does everything in her power to tempt you. Her lust-filled eyes are fixated on you and hold yours in place. You feel her hands unbuckling your belt and pulling down your pants but you’re completely powerless to react. Maybe you don’t want to.

Her first touch on your exposed shaft sends shivers up your spine. When she spits on your cock and begins to stroke it, you’re pulled back closer to sin and your rational thoughts are pushed further away. Yiren doesn’t stop there, especially when there’s so much more she can do. She dips her head lower and begins to pepper your balls with light kisses. It becomes so much easier to give in to your primal desires when she lightly sucks them. You manage to hold back a moan but your resistance is crumbling fast.

Your eyes dart up and look at the door. It isn’t locked. In a final attempt to stop, you mumble, “Someone might come in and catch us.”

As if being caught is the only problem with this.

Yiren licks your cock from the base to the tip before she looks into your eyes. “So let them watch.” You twitch in her hands and elicit a smirk from her. “Let them watch how good you fuck your good little student.”

You take a step across the line once again. When she wraps her lips around your girth, you hold her hair and push her lower onto your dick. Taking her time, Yiren takes you into her mouth inch by inch until your full length is in. She keeps you there and loudly gags on your cock, making a mess on your crotch with her saliva. Then, as slowly as she took you in, she peels off you, her lips still maintaining their tight seal around your girth.

Your hands clutch onto your chair, trying to ground yourself into reality. You’re a teacher. Yiren’s your student. She’s sucking you off. She’s giving you the best blowjob you’ve ever had.

“Fuck, your cock tastes so good, Sir.” Yiren continues to lick your slit and leaking precum. “You like my mouth on your cock?”

A groan will suffice. You don’t need any other answer. You only need her skilful mouth pleasuring you.

“Shut up and fucking suck my dick.”

She takes you in her mouth once again, this time letting the tip hit the back of her throat. Her hand rubs your balls and she alternates between deepthroating you and stroking you quickly.

The room is filled with the sounds of Yiren’s sloppy blowjob and your deep breaths. If anyone were to walk by your office, surely you’ll be in deep trouble. However, the fear of getting caught has long slipped your mind, replaced by the ever-growing lust for your student.

You yank her off your cock by the hair and pull her onto her feet. Hastily undo all her shirt buttons and rid her of the top, followed by her bra. You barely get any time to admire her bare chest before she turns around, so your hands roam her body instead, feeling up her waist and her tummy, fondling her breasts and pinching her nipples. This perfect body that thousands watch and dream about touching that only you get the honour of doing so.

Yiren leans against your chest and unzips her skirt. It drops to the floor and leaves her in her panties. You wish to reach into it and finger her but she pushes off you and supports herself on the desk. She repeatedly shakes her ass and pushes it back to you, her clothed ass occasionally brushes against your swollen tip.

Her teasing got to you and you’re too impatient for that at this point. You bend down and peel her panties off her, ridding Yiren of her last article of clothing. You finally get to see her naked in the flesh and even get a close up view. Your forefinger rubs her lower lips to find that she’s utterly wet. Curiosity got to you and you get a quick taste of her essence. Fuck, she’s so delectable.

You wish to bury yourself between her thighs and drown in her juices but you have a better prize instead—your hottest student is aching and desperate for you to fuck her. Having perfectly positioned yourself behind Yiren, you press your tip against her pussy. She looks over her shoulder and bites her lips.

Your heart pounds. You’re about to do it. You’re about to fuck your student. You’re about to fuck the Wang Yiren. Fully entering her body in one go, you're quickly overwhelmed. You want nothing other than to fuck this girl over and over.

“God, you have no clue how long I’ve wanted this.”

“If you had asked, I would let you fucked me earlier.”

“Then we have a lot of lost time to make up.” You kiss her cheek. “I’ll need to schedule more meetings with you.”

Yiren giggles in response and you feel her clench around you even further. As you continue to indulge in her body, more sinful thoughts fill your head, particularly all the things you want to do to Yiren.

Raise your hand and land a slap on her butt. Immediately, there is a reaction—her body tenses up and her pussy clenches around you. Yiren drags out a moan before she turns to you. The glint in her eyes tells you that she wants more. You time your next few slaps with your thrusts. Partially withdraw your cock from her, then land a spank on her. When her body jolts forward, hold her hips and pull her back to yours, thrusting your dick in at the same time. Upon establishing this rhythm, your strength gradually increases and you spank and fuck Yiren harder.

This is addictive. You’ve been “using” her to relieve yourself for months now, watching her put on provocative performances on the internet, but now, you’re truly using her as an outlet for your pleasure without a care about hers, although there is no doubt she’s enjoying herself too. You can’t go back from here. There’s no return to just jerking off to her videos. You need her.

Soon after, you press onto her back to slam her onto your desk and pin her waist against the edge, keeping her writhing body still while you continue to have your way with her. Caught off guard, Yiren yelps in pain. Her walls tighten around you as she gets closer to her peak. She’s so snug, so wet, and you take it as a signal to give her the final push. Digging your heels into the floor, you put more energy into your hips, forgoing strength for speed, all the while not letting up on your spanks. Tug her hair and lean straight into her ear, “Cum.”

Yiren instantly melts into her orgasm and loudly moans as pleasure washes over her. You remain buried deep in her throughout it, her pussy pulsating around your cock and bringing you a step closer to cumming.

Moments later, you pull out of her and fall back onto your chair, your slick-coated shaft still erect and aching for your own orgasm. Yiren remains bent over the table while recovering and you note the shade of red on her ass. It’s even redder than any of the other times she spanked herself on her videos.

Still, you can’t resist giving one last slap to her ass and watching her flesh ripple. She turns around and giggles before leaning over you. Her left hand holds your cheek and pulls you in for a kiss while her right wraps itself around your cock and briefly strokes you.

“Yiren, I want to watch you fuck yourself on my cock.”

“Anything for you, Sir.”

Yiren straddles you and inserts you back into her wet pussy. She holds onto your shoulder and rides you with the sole purpose of milking your cum. She tosses her head back and moans at the sheer pleasure of fucking you.

Your senses are in overdrive. Days ago, the video only showed her riding the toy from the back and you were satisfied already. Now, you get to watch her pretty face contort in pleasure and nothing can beat this view anymore. The feel of her tight pussy is out of the world as her snug walls pulsating around you brings you more pleasure than all her videos combined. Her moans are mixed with your deep groans as well as the repeated sounds of skin slapping, surely anyone who passes by will know what’s going on. The musky scent that fills the enclosed room is one that you wish to keep permanently in your office. Her taste still lingers on your tongue that makes you seek for more.

When she leans further into you, you kiss her neck and down to her chest. Her breasts are a perfect size, all the times she teases her nipples makes you want to nibble on them and now you have the perfect opportunity to do so.

Yiren digs into your skin with each passing second and she picks up the rhythm. You try your best to hold back as you want to prolong this session but her body is just too hot. You don’t know how long it has been since she first entered your office and you don’t know how you have lasted this long.

“Are you going to cum in me Sir?”

“Of course.”

“Good. Fill me up. Fulfil your dreams of cumming in your good little student’s pussy.”

Your willpower has been chipped away and your body starts to crumble and give in. Holding her butt and slamming her petite body harder onto your lap, you thrust your hips up as much as you can.

“Fuck!”

You hold her tight as you do just that. Spurts of cum are shot into Yiren as you experience an orgasmic high like never before. She gently grinds on you throughout, ensuring every drop of cum leaves your body and is buried inside hers.

You sigh after you recover and bits of your conscience come flowing back. You shouldn’t have done that. It felt amazing, but you shouldn’t have fucked Yiren. When she lifts herself off your cock, you struggle to keep a moan in out of the fear that she pulls you in for another session.

She hastily puts on her clothes, leaving her bra and panties in your possession. You follow right after, haphazardly dressing yourself as fear of getting caught begins to seep in. While you’re doing so, Yiren leans against your desk and dips her fingers under her skirt. She scoops some of your cum out of her pussy and licks it clean. “You taste good.”

She then grabs her bag and heads out of your office but not before stopping at the door and turning back to you.

“See you soon, Sir.”

~~~~~~

The rest of the day goes by with your mind wandering about this afternoon’s events. You’re back home and by your desk. Why are you here again?

Your laptop is open. The website is loading. You’re preparing to undress yourself and to watch Yiren’s videos once again. Now knowing how Yiren’s petite body feels under your touch surely makes watching her videos much more enjoyable. The voice in your head quickly gives up and is suppressed. The sinful thoughts prevail once again.

At the top of the blog is her latest release—“Couldn't Resist Fuck During Office Hours With Teacher, Multiple Orgasms Spanking Doggy Style Sex Party!”. Your hand shivers as you click onto it. Eyes widen as you realise she has somehow recorded the session from earlier, capturing the action from multiple angles. Distraught, betrayal and anger fills you. You’d never expect to be set up like that.

But while your blood continues to boil, another feeling resurfaces. An extremely familiar one.

You pull down your shorts and boxers. The video plays and you stroke yourself with each frame triggering memories of her touch.

Maybe Yiren isn’t a good little student after all.

******

A/N3: Thanks for reading :) Please don’t record your sexual acts without your partner’s consent IRL

#kpop fanfic #kpop smut #everglow #everglow smut #wang yiren #yiren smut

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copperbadge · 9 months

Text

Well, Still Salty.

I was cranky yesterday and I thought a good night's sleep would provide some adjustment in perspective, but unfortunately "spending yesterday not on tumblr" also offered perspective and got there first.

Up front: feel free to comment or reblog on this post (replies may be heavily delayed) but if you feel the urge to Like, I'm going to ask you to take one more step and go to https://www.tumblr.com/support, select "feedback" as the category, and enter a line or two about the new dash. It can be as simple as "Your new dash design is difficult to use and is driving people off the site". I'm not asking everyone to do it, but if you're going to Like this post, that would be a helpful action in addition. You can delete any response they send; no reason to expose yourself to the unique combination of incompetence and condescension with which they handle feedback generally.

Also up front: yeah, if I find somewhere else to go and go there, I will certainly let you guys know beforehand, I'm not going to just evaporate. I'll be broadcasting about Tumblr's replacement on Tumblr very heavily. But I can't deny that it is now an active goal of mine to find a viable replacement for this site. (More on this in a moment.) You will always be able to find me on AO3 as copperbadge, or via [email protected]. (More on this in a moment also.)

This kind of thing is why I refuse to fuck with staff now or ever; I don't trust them and I never will. Watching @wip respond to almost every complaint or suggestion with "but that would be really hard" is telling. Whoever is pushing blocks around at Tumblr wants a lucrative site that's easy to code, but lucrative is hostile to community and code is difficult by nature, and when the architecture of the meeting hall is hostile and cheap, people don't stick around.

I've been watching the site as every change made it incrementally worse, from a buggy post window that doesn't allow ease of editing to the new dash (which is the reason I'm writing this in a text window off Tumblr). I genuinely do not think I can use desktop Tumblr like this unless I can install something that will put it back the way it was, and roughly 40% of the content you guys get HAS to come through desktop. It's impossible to do on a phone or so time-consuming it's not worth it. I cannot code Radio Free Monday on a phone; it's a struggle to code it on a single-monitor laptop (I usually write it on my work computer, where I have two monitors). Even writing image IDs on the phone is difficult and something I rarely do. Tumblr is becoming an actively difficult place for me to make content, introducing friction left and right.

But where does one go? I've tried other platforms and they're either worse to use or they don't have the constituency. The problem with a lot of discourse around internet addiction is that it often points out how glued people are to their phones without asking what it is they're doing on those phones. I'm not addicted to social media; I don't doomscroll, I don't care what celebrities have to say, I don't find 140 characters useful or interesting, I don’t find most “funny” videos very interesting. I create a lot of original content for public consumption, significantly more than many social media users, and if that becomes difficult, then the site suffers more than I do. But it's undeniable that social media, and this social media in specific, is where my people are, and yeah, I like seeing you all every day. It makes it difficult to leave even when Tumblr is the best of a bad set of options.

It seems like a lot of the internet, lately, is the best of a bad set of options.

All that said, Tumblr forced a sudden, unwanted, and unchangeable reskin on me a day after I listened to a two-hour podcast about addiction while working on building a newsletter system for my author site. I spent the evening before this happened in contemplation of my relationship to social media and to my readership and how I might alter it to my benefit regardless of whether that's also to Tumblr's detriment. Their poor timing, I suppose. A lot of the theories advanced on the podcast were, to put it kindly, bunk, but one of the suggestions for people questioning their relationship to an activity was a dopamine fast -- removing something in your life that gives you quick but unsustained dopamine hits, so that you can take some time to level out and examine your behaviors. On the one hand, that's not at all how dopamine works; from the jump it's a bad theory. But on the other, pulling back from something you think may be causing you difficulty is generally speaking a good tactic.

Removing myself from Tumblr yesterday was an active process: because I have ADHD and often will forget something exists if I don't systematize my engagement with it, Tumblr is normally pinned to my browser, with the app on my phone's top screen. Removing the app and closing the window meant that while I occasionally reached for Tumblr, it was less frequently than I expected, and the lack of access reminded me why I wasn't there. I missed you guys, but I didn't miss getting distracted from work by my dash, or the pressure to respond to the volume of communication I receive through the site daily. I don't think my use of tumblr as my sole social media has been unhealthy, per se, but certainly yesterday felt both quieter and calmer after I walked away.

But that's a temporary relief, because you are my community, and not only do I not want to leave my community, it's a resource for me. One of the reasons I do things like Radio Free Monday and the weekly Hug on Saturdays is that I try to make sure that resource is reciprocal. Leadership involves service. Leaving would be easy in the short term, but in the long term, leaving my community without having another place to meet it, or another community to go to, would be harmful to both of us. I'm already someone who isolates, and while I have a strong brickspace circle of friends, they fulfill sometimes different needs.

Though I do appreciate the wild vote of confidence from the comments to my last post telling me people would come with me where I went. That means a lot to me. I will attempt to make it either unnecessary or as painless as possible. Just know, I see your faith and friendship and I appreciate it.

Sometimes at my old job I'd be in very tumultuous meetings where a lot was discussed and not much agreed on, and the most useful thing to me was always to say, "What are our next steps? What would you like me to do because of this meeting?" So what are next steps, all this being the case?

First, I'm going to be off Tumblr, mostly, for another couple of days, because clearly I need the break and a few days won't matter too much. Again, I will be back either to continue on the site or to let you guys know, at length and volume, where I'm headed. The former is much more likely.

Second, I'm going to be actively looking for both a widget I can install to reset the dash (recommendations welcome, I currently don't even use xkit) and a wholly new platform that's a realistically viable alternative. Even if the dash gets reset, the shitty post editor is here for good. Attempts to source alternative platforms in the past have taught me that it needs to have a mobile-friendly site or an app, a similar structure to tumblr, and a reasonable chance of actually attracting users. That's a heavy venn diagram unlikely to be fulfilled anytime soon, but I'm now invested in finding it, instead of just passively waiting for it to happen to me (as Tumblr did when it pulled me off LJ).

Third, I do have an email newsletter in the works! I'm just wrestling currently with setting up how people sign up for it. This wasn't meant to be "my main broadcast platform"; it's meant to be a once-monthly email to share book news, targeted at people who aren't on socials or who just really love content from me, I guess. :D The plan was for me to assure Tumblr users that it was not extra content, just select content repackaged into a digest. But it will be one way to ensure that if I'm moving around outside of Tumblr, you'll know about it. I hope to have a link to a signup page soon. (I'm....dealing with some code issues.)

Fourth, I'm going to be combing through the last ten years I've spent here and pulling anything I think is of value into an archive. For now everything will remain here as well, and I'll let you guys know if I think that's going to change, but it's clear that this space is moving only one direction, towards a place I can't exist, and when/if it crumbles I want to have already evacuated what's important.

So there you go. I'll possibly be posting sporadically (the Saturday Hugs are queued six months in advance so that'll happen) but if nothing else and if not sooner, I'll be back full-time next week starting with Radio Free Monday. I appreciate your patience and your kindness in the meantime!

#tumblr #social media

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nika-vincent · 8 months

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Long post warning.

I'm trying to put together some thoughts (also based on recent discussions with many great folks) about the romance path with Halsin in the form that it is presented in the game at the moment with the hope that Larian will notice our comments on this. And part 2 about Halsin's personality in the game. Please, fear not, it will be without aggression. So take some tea, my friends, and let's get started!☕

From the very beginning of EA, we had an image of Halsin that stood out not only by his appearance (it was difficult to not notice the thirsty comments of fans about this), but also by the excellent qualities of his character. He is one of those characters who sincerely wants to help us with our parasite and not try to use us in a bad way or even kill us.

He has the impression, you know, of a big adult man who at first glance looks serious and rather harsh, but when you learn more about him, you realize that this is a man with a kind heart, caring, protecting, not leaving you in trouble. He reminds me of Hagrid from the Harry Potter universe. And this image of him was so loved by many people (including me) that we wanted to see more of it when the game was released. There was no limit to my delight when, after the release of the game, we were able to ask about his hobbies. Gods, how all these cute things fit him that he loves honey and carves wood in his spare time.🥰 I want more of this!❤

We began to fantasize about what a romance with Halsin could be, and expected that these beautiful traits of his character would manifest themselves here. That he will be protective for Tav, gentle, romantic and caring. I was incredibly happy that we were finally given the opportunity to have a romance with him and the words during the PFH that Halsin and Astarion had become the most popular characters of EA gave great expectations.

Of course, after the release of the game, many things have remained behind the scenes for now, due to lack of time to implement the rest of things I believe, and I assume that there is a chance of adding this with patches. But let's move on to the things we have at the moment.

What surprised me not in a good way was that I noticed some strange emphasis on Halsin's sexuality and various jokes towards his body in the game itself. I assume that perhaps the developers wanted to make some kind of reference to the thirsty comments of fans about Halsin, which can often be seen on the Internet. But I think it would be better to leave it between fans, and not literally implement it in the game. I do not deny his sexuality myself and say that his arms are made for hugs! But there should be a limit to everything, I think. I can make an exception about the fact that we can ask about why he is so big for an elf. It looks quite harmless and even his reaction amuses.😁

The reference to 'Daddy Halsin' in his ending was great and really funny! It looks unobtrusive and does not create the feeling of awkwardness and discomfort that we got from some of his stories from the past...

The story of Halsin's sexual past and how the romance with him is presented in the game has been most criticized by players, and there are several reasons for this. We found out that he had many lovers throughout his life (So it is lovers, not special loved ones). And then we also learn that when he was a young druid, he traveled through the underdark and found himself a guest in a noble Drow house, in which the matron and the patron showed interest in him and chained him for three years in their bedchamber, where he played the role of 'guest, prisoner and consort'. Honestly, the last thing I expected was that Halsin would get such a backstory, given that we had kept in mind for so long the image of him which I described at the beginning of this article. It literally took me by surprise. And especially the fact that he talks about it so calmly and even with a note of gaiety, as if this is a common thing that could happen to anyone.

I don't understand the need to add such things to him. Perhaps the developers wanted to show in this way that a man with such an attractive appearance is obliged to have a hot sexual experience and give him an image of something like a Faerun Casanova? If so, it turned out to be quite inappropriate and even creepy, and the players perceived it more as a sexual abuse towards him than as an experience.

It can be noticed that even Halsin himself is not very enthusiastic with the fact that remarks about his physique are the first thing people talk about. Clipping from @lylakoi 's screenshot:

And all this strongly contradicts how we initially fell in love with Halsin and how we wanted to see him and his romance in the release. The romantic relationship between Tav and Halsin at the moment looks more built on physical attraction, rather than on love, care and mutual respect. Most likely, this is due to the noticeable lack of romance content at the moment and more soft things and scenes will be added to the patches that would dilute it well so that it does not catch the eye. I just wanted the romance to be less fixated on lust, and more on feelings and romantic things between Tav and Halsin.

The most terrible thing that literally brought tears to my eyes is the fact that he can talk about his feelings and love only when we ourselves can behave like an abuser with him, when we decide to break up with him and change our minds. We see how much it hurts him that we are playing with his heart. Because at the moment there are no other romantic scenes in the game in which we can discuss with him our feelings and that we love each other, as it happens with other companions.

Polyamory also does not work quite correctly in the game, because it seems that he wants Tav to be poly in the relationship, not him. It looks something like: 'You're all I want, but don't get stuck on me and find someone else' uhh, what? I only want to romance you, why should I find someone else? This dialogue is appropriate if I was already in a relationship with another companion and would like to be with Halsin too. But if I want to have a romance with him alone, then I believe that the dialogue should be different and not insist on 'sharing' if I have not a relationship with anyone.

Given the whole story that he only had lovers and sexual slavery, I assume that Halsin has never experienced true love with anyone, and only knows how to be used by everyone. If this was the original idea of the writers, which has not yet been brought to its logical end, then the role of Tav in the romance with Halsin here should be quite important in order to see the development of their relationship. The main goal in the romance should be that Tav will allow Halsin to feel what it's like to be truly important and loved. Remember when in the act 2 he was touched by the fact that Tav shared a campfire and their company with him. Screenshot by @lylakoi :

It is clearly evident that such things that someone does for him are unusual to him and touch his very heart. Most likely, he is used to giving, not receiving.

The bed scene with him is absolutely beautiful, I can even give a standing ovation.❤ I would only add after that a scene where Tav and Halsin are lying side by side, looking at the stars and having a romantic conversation. That would end the night perfectly.🙏

It is necessary to add more soft interactions for Halsin, so that there is more emphasis on the development of his personal qualities. We are well aware of his attractiveness and there is no need to emphasize this once again with strange jokes and stories with sexual abuse.

The Interaction in the camp with owlbear and Scratch will be great for him! Maybe even add some scenes with companions in act 2, where Halsin would try to calm the guys arguing with each other. That would add +1 to his personality traits. Also, more of his reactions to any events or during the dialogues with someone will not hurt.

For a romance, I would suggest definitely adding a scene with a date. Even a scene where Halsin would give an ornament for Tav that he carved out of wood. Maybe some episode in the city that would shock him (For example, he witnessed the rough treatment of animals or orphans) and make him turn into a bear from rage and we would try to calm him down by choosing the option 'reach out and stroke him' (Yes, yes, I mentally create fanfics during 3 am, don't blame me😅) Also a scene where we could hug him and confess that we love him. And now the romance no longer looks focused on lust.

The opportunity to go with Halsin in the ending also deserves to exist. Halsin mentioned that he would like to have a family, so he and Tav could perfectly help orphans together in Thaniel's world.🙏

That's all for today. My opinion about Larian has not changed for the worse, for me they are still great guys who delight me with their positive attitude to the community. Unpleasant situations can happen, it is inevitable. But there is always a chance to fix something. I really want to hope that they will cope with everything and listen to our feedbacks and everything will gradually get better with the patches.❤

Thank you for reading this review to the end.🙏❤ I also suggest joining the discussion to Larian's discord in the 'bg3-feedback' section.

#baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate #baldur's gate 3 spoilers #bg3 spoilers #bg #bg3 halsin #halsin #halsin romance #druid halsin #halsin x tav #larian studios #ps5 #pc game

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sykestarot · 5 months

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how does your crush feel about you?

1-2-3 (left to right)

I do not own any of these images

Hi everyone! Sorry about last week and not being able to post my internet was out ! :( I hope y'all enjoy this weeks reading there are some tough messages in here so please proceed with caution and remember that these are all made with your highest good in mind! Also don't forget to check the patreon :)! Thanks for stopping by!

Pile 1

"you don't intend to do anything you say at all"

(7 of wands; The Lovers (rx); 2 of swords; King of Cups; The Hierophant (rx); 4 of pentacles (rx)) So pile one your energy is that of someone who is very out of balance. Whether that be because of your ability to disassociate and make up a fantasy or because life has just been hard recently, I see that this out of balance energy affects your perception of the situation with your crush. I feel like you guys have known each other for a while and for you you truly believe that you guys are soulmates and meant to have the kids, the house, the white picket fence, but I see that they don’t see it that way. I feel like this person sees you and goes, ”well maybe it could work, we’ve known each other for a long time.” Which is shitty because I feel like they are aware of how you feel about them. I feel like they string you along on these awful ups and downs of will they, won't theys. I see that the love you carry for this person is so pure that they love bathing in it, you make this person feel so worthy of everything and they make you feel so much less than worthy to have them. I feel like in regards to you just want them to have even an ounce of the love that you hold for them and I think maybe when you were younger they really earnestly tried, but now it's purely taking advantage of you. I think perhaps they keep you as a friend but walk the line of flirting and when you bring things up about being serious they freak out and gaslight you into thinking you just read too much into it. I feel this situation has made you very anxious and it’s taking a toll on your mental health. I also feel like you are acutely aware of the situation and are choosing not to make changes because you’re afraid this person will leave your life. I’m so sorry pile 1, I know this probably isn’t what you wanted to hear, you deserve so much better, and I promise you there is someone out there who will love you for you and appreciate all that you have to offer. I hope you are able to see just how valuable you are. Signs: mornings; fog; dew; green plants; sunsets; nights at the beach; drives at night; cologne; lonely nights; full moons; Lexus?

Pile 2

"but i can see us lost in the memory"

(Ace of Swords (rx); 6 of wands; Page of Swords (rx); 2 of swords (rx); The High Priestess (rx); The Tower) Hi Pile 2! So for you guys I feel like this might’ve been a summer fling, or someone you met while being home from college in the summer. I see that this person thinks about you all the time. I feel like you rocked their world (spicy!). I also feel like they are upset by how far away you guys are from each other. So this is definitely a long distance, maybe even internet crush? I feel like you guys don’t communicate though, like you guys resumed your lives after one of you left but you both still sit there and think about each other. I see that there’s even a loss of interest in others where they are because of you. They might feel like they don’t want to bother you and communicate that they have feelings for you because they feel like you’re a catch and probably don’t want them the way that they want you. I also feel like they don’t want the burden of a long distance connection, not because they aren’t loyal but because they want to be near you if they’re committed to you. I see them day dreaming about a future with you and wondering how often you think of them. I think they’re under the impression that you weren’t that into them, which is funny because they’re your crush too! I see that this person would rather leave it up to fate to see if you guys end up together rather than going out of their way to confess to you, but I also feel like if you confessed they’d be over the moon. I feel like they’re the romantic type and want to bring you flowers and cook you dinner. I also feel LOTS of sexual energy surrounding this. Like you stay living in their head if ykwim. This piles all giggles and passion I love that for you! I’m under the assumption that them leaving it up to fate means at some point you guys will be in the same general area again, or it is highly likely that you will be in the future. This person is probably in love with you honestly. I feel like this also has a heavy right person wrong time energy as well. Signs: 777; 333; 444; music; beaches; lipstick kisses; brown hair; tanned skin; pool days; stolen glances; teasing; holding hands under the table; dimples; smirks

Pile 3

"i can wish all i want, but it won't bring us together"

(4 of cups; The Chariot (rx); 7 of cups (rx); 8 of wands; 2 of pentacles; The Hermit) Pile 3! I feel like your crush is interested in you but also has interest in others. Not necessarily in a bad way but more like a “we’re young and I want to explore my options” kind of way. I see though that they are having a hard time taking any type of control in their life and need lots of time alone to make decisions. I do feel like there is genuine feelings between you two and likely not between them and another person, however I feel like this might have something to do with societal pressure to be a playboy or maybe friends influencing decisions that this person makes. I see them wanting to communicate feelings for you but then stepping back and questioning if they should or not. I feel like they don’t want to hurt you and telling you that they want to keep things open would fill them with some sense of guilt tbh. They are so out of balance in terms of just energy to get through the day. I feel like they keep pushing through their days by just counting down till they can go to sleep. I see them not wanting to deal with anything other than what they’re going through. Which is absolutely selfish but it almost seems necessary at this point in time. This person might be creative and lacking in energy to create and that’s having an effect on their day to day life as well. I feel like this person would do well with having a diary and maybe seeing their thoughts on paper would make them realize how they feel. I also feel like this pile might be the in a relationship pile. Like you guys have been going out for a while and there are deep feelings that surround this connection. All in all I feel like this could be an identity crisis and you should only stick around for as long as your willing and what makes it worth it to you. Remember your worth Pile 3! Signs: 9; white sports car; ocean; nice house; travel; hikes; gold course; swans; crossroads; indefinite; spilled coffee; resting head on shoulder; white shirts

#spotify #pick a card reading #reading tarot #channeled message #channeled song #channeling #divination #law of attraction #pac #pap #spiritual #spirituality #spiritual awakening #spiritualgrowth #tarot reading #tarot cards #tarot #channeled art

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thottybrucewayne · 4 months

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A LIST OF PEOPLE WHO ARE GOING TO HELL: 2024 EDITION

Every zionist, duh, but esp yall who screenshot perfectly reasonable posts and go "Um, the look at this idiot who thinks genocide is wrong" yall make my ass itch and nobody takes you seriously, MOVE. 2. The entire U.S. government but esp Joe Biden that old ass man gettin spit roasted in hell (AND NOT THE FUN KIND!) 3. DIDDY AND EVERY SINGLE PERSON THAT PROTECTED AND DEFENDED HIM. 4. Tory Lanez whole family, his mama, his daddy, his dog? All them. 5. The nonblack people who run those Rap House Tv type blogs that are clearly trying to be shade room clones. 6. People who get all their news from the Shade Room and Whatsapp, sorry auntie, I'm sick of you tellin' me COVID can be cured by sticking cloves of garlic up my nose :/ 7. Every single one of you dirtbag leftist ass people, yall do nothing for nobody except you thousands of adoring "former nazi" fans that need to be told it's okay that they still say the n word in private. 8. N.O.R.E and every single hiphop "journalist" 9. Charlemagne Tha God and Dj Envy, they know why. 10. Everyone who made Ike and Tina jokes after Tina past away. Grow up. 11. You fanfic girlies. So many of y'all are seeing the lake of fire, But esp if you donate to ao3 or own ao3 merch. Like, that is just embarrassing. 12. It's 2024, If I see you coming up here saying shit like "Miku wroke harry potter!" or " Hello Kitty wrote Ofmed, actually" I'm sending you to hell myself. 13. Booktokers? This is yall the second year on this list, tighten the fuck up and stop being weird about strange men on the internet, now. 14. People who do LITERALLY NOTHING yet try to tell other people how to be activists. You contribute nothing to any conversation you're a part of, suck my dick from the back. 15. People who stopped masking because other people were making them feel bad. Fuck your mama not being able to see your smile, PEOPLE ARE DYING???? 16. Lana Del Ray and Taylor Swift. They know exactly what they did. 17. Every white girl on twt who tried to jump me cause I said the Barbie movie is white feminism at its finest. 18. Elon, you raggedy bitch. 19. Every single man who hit on me this year who isn't one of my friends. 20. People who don't know what transmisogyny means and make that everyone else's problem. I need yall to start reading so bad it's not even funny. 21. You "goth is a feeling" people. You gonna be "feeling" that hell fire nippin' at your ass, NEXT 22. You 35 defending fanservice of high schoolers in anime/manga all day every day...yeah, just get on down there, big fella. They waiting on you. 23. Cishet Black men on tiktok and twt who make it their life's mission to make an ass of themselves for minor ducats. You are a one-man modern-day minstrel show and you will be dealt with. 24. White Tyler The Creator fans. Y'all know what you do.

Dishonorable mentions: Shojo fans who never talk about the fucked up shit in the manga they recc you because "At least its not as misogynistic as shounen!" (yes, yes it is) Fashion tiktokkers I hate so many of you its not even funny Every person who put the image of T.D. Jakes getting his doonies beat down at a Diddy party in my mind. Like I literally never needed to think about that. My dad <3 and all my friends' dads. Patricide NOW!!!!! People who are still whining about having to boycott shut upppppp god damn. People who stare at me in public. You got a fuckin problem?????

That's a wrap! Here are the lists from last year and the year before feel free to add more in the tags <3

#thotty speaks #thotty's going to hell list 2024 #thotty rants #tw abuse mention #ask to tag

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centrally-unplanned · 2 years

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Today is the 20th Anniversary of the release of Haibane Renmei, which is a great time to post art. Good art, you ask? Oh the best - early 2000′s wallpapers from the dregs of the internet, of course!

Nothing says “graphic design is my passion” like throwing black font on a black background because, like, its the Black Parade? It has to be black???

Another genre of Wallpaper at the time was the ‘anime + poetry’ blend, which Haibane was a poster child for:

Posted by “Knight Of Lain” in 2005 as their first wallpaper, King tier shit. This genre really died out by ~2010, but I think early internet had a lot of quasi-spiritual, “Christian-ish but I don’t like, read the bible ya know?” teens for whom Haibane’s ennui & iconography really hit home. Those people are either practicing capital-W Witches or Gwyneth Paltrow now.

Something I did discover when browsing DeviantArt was the people who uploaded “wallpapers” that were just screenshots? Of their desktops? So like their UI was still there, so you couldn’t really download it as a wallpaper:

At the time that would be frustrating, now its perfect Y2K-core vibes. “Posted in 2006″ yeah I gathered that, show me the Warcraft 3 mods don’t tease me like this!!

To diversify a bit, I did find this Winamp skin in the Museum, fully ‘flipped image’ and everything like how it was done at the time:

I find this particularly amusing because I know why it exists - Serial Experiments Lain was hugely popular with the techno scene for obvious reasons, so there are tons of winamp skins for that show, and Haibane is related to Lain, so even though Haibane shares like none of Lain’s aesthetic in that regard...why not right?

On the more professional side, Megatokyo Author Fred Gallagher absolutely did a Haibane-inspired sidestory in his webcomic in 2007! He loved the anime and I think its ‘genre’ was something he was trying hard to emulate in the late 2000′s:

Link if you want to read it, though the Haibane elements are more aesthetics than plot.

To end this a little meta, Haibane wallpapers, like everything back then, were built out of “constituent parts”, official art from scanned artbooks and promotional material, cut & recoloured in photoshop. One of the big source ones at the time came from this image, if I recall correctly:

Which is funny, because it kindof isn't from Haibane Renmei? That isn’t Rakka. Its from Yoshitoshi Abe, in a doujin he published in 1998 *called* Haibane Renmei, but it was extremely different from the show. Its just a collection of standalone art jumping between cute and gothic-creepy, and these angels live in modern Japan:

The latter creepy stuff is actually kindof funny, as you can tell this guy is definitely designing for Serial Experiments Lain at the time - which shares that sensibility deeply - but its an aesthetic that would barely survive in the actual product by the time the *true* predecessor doujin of the anime, Haibane of Old Home, would be released in 2001. But since so many Haibane fans *were* alt-edgy goth loving freaks due to how Haibane was situated & transmitted in western anime cultural spaces at the time (and its inherent themes, not taking that away), pulling from the extant creepy art out there was a natural instinct. So that og image just...became Rakka.

You can check out the 1998 doujin here in full if you want - if you are a fan of NieA under 7, the other anime based on one of ABe’s doujin, you will definitely notice some proto-characters for that story in this.

(Also since it has happened before, every art featured here is unironically great, their creators are great for making them. Cringe is dead, I love all of this)

#haibane renmei #2000s internet #western weebdom history

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ghostflowerhotpotch · 9 months

Note

Do you think that gwen stacy is trans?

Yes, yes I do.

Now, the last time I talked about this I also mentioned I didn't see a point in making a post about it, because nothing I was going to say was going to be different than what you had probably already seen everywhere else.

That being said-

I had seen SO MANY idiots on the internet, to which I haven't replied (because I am also trans I used to know when or not to bother with people like that,) which had made me want to discuss the matter in my own words, even if I can't truly add anything new to the table.

So, I will probably do the same reasoning everyone else had already said, if anyone is still interested in reading it feel free, if not you can scroll. I will also address some common criticism of the theory.

Before we start the actual arguments, a few things.

No, I don't think if you believe Gwen is cis you are transphobic or something, as long as you are respectful.

I can't say how people see her or not, and while for me the evidence feels obvious, I know unless we have Gwen saying it (or someone close to her at least,) it cannot be sure one way or another. Remember that, ONE WAY OR ANOTHER.

I am fine if someone doesn't think she is trans, but I do think believing is IMPOSSIBLE for her to be is when you are entering transphobic territory. The reason why I think this is dumb, aside of the evidence; is the fact that if a character doesn't need to say I'm cis at any point to believe so, Gwen shouldn't need to say I'm trans for people to HC her as such or similar.

With that out of the way, let's start.

Going back to this image, we see that Gwen has a flag that says "Protect trans kids." Which to me feels like says a lot.

I had seen people suggest that "Of course she is an ally, she is a hero!" And while I could get Gwen being interested in helping people who face discrimination, since she deals with crime and such; the idea has me cackling more than anything else.

Is not impossible, but seriously, WHEN had you seen an ally with a flag in their room? It feels like an excuse someone who is in the closet would say; allies could have trans stuff or displayed in certain situations, but those situations tend to be in public, you know? Since being an ally means being vocal when you need to; there is really no reason for an Ally to have a trans flag in their room as decoration.

To top it all off, is on top of her door, not a window or anything, is obviously this is more for her than anything else.

George Stacy has a trans flag on his uniform.

This...This a really big deal honestly.

In a vacuum is a small gesture, perhaps if you aren't part of the community you don't get why I think this is amazing. So let me say a couple of things.

He is supporting his trans daughter; maybe is because of my family, or because all of my current trans and non-gender conforming friends have parents who range from shitting to not very supportive in general. So having Gwen be trans, still be a teen, and her dad supporting her? FUCK that means the world to me, even if I think he isn't that good of a dad.

This is in his uniform, this isn't just supporting Gwen in front of her, but also when she isn't around. You would be surprised how many parents say to be supportive but be quiet while hearing about discrimination. This also can lead me to believe he will be supportive when other trans individuals are around.

He is a cop. In real life, I don't feel safe around cops for a multitude of reasons I will not get to because I don't want to get too political here. Regardless, the fact that he is the Police Captain of his department while having this shows that he can be supportive of trans people, is huge.

Now, I know the next piece of evidence has been debated A LOT, especially for people who honestly, have clearly no idea how cinema, animation, or art work at all.

You know? Coding can be so funny at times.

There have been multiple times, when things had been coded on purpose, to the point I thought it was as subtle as a brick hitting your face; and yet I still find people who don't get it and just baffled me to not end.

Examples: Norma in Dead End Paranormal is coded as autistic, but it is never explicitly said on the show, (I think is mentioned in the comics? I know the creator is autistic.) However I never felt it needed to, because Normal has so many signs and hints that I clock her in the first episode, and the representation is so point it feels as if she needed to state she is a woman of color.

Nimona is another example related to the trans experience; seriously almost word for word what Nimona says can be applied to trans people, with the creator also being trans; and yet I was baffled to see some people saw the movie and didn't clock that.

Now, is what Gwen is saying in this scene talking about her experience being Spider-woman? Yes. However, just like Nimona didn't explicitly say she was trans, their entire story revolves around a trans allegory (As well as being likely genderfluid,) feels like is trying to say something.

Not to mention that this is a story, an animated one at that; everything you see on screen was put there by someone and animation tends to have fewer coincidences because you are going to be staring at this screen for a LONG time most probably. It was also noted by the crunch situation (which is again, horrifying and I think Chris Miller needs to find another way to work rather than wasting time and resources like he did,) that the writers had a tendency to tweak to make sure everything was on point; this couldn't have been thrown carelessly.

With all of this preface, Gwen's speech in this section? This could be played WORD BY WORD on a come-out speech.

"And they can only know half of who I am!" -> Having your real gender identity in the closet a lot of times feels like you need to hide half of who you are, from likings to aesthetics to even how you behave socially, it can be a big toll.

"So I'm completely on my own!" -> This is a common sentiment for people who are in the closet without support, because you are carrying all these feelings alone and have no one to understand.

"And now, I don't- I don't even know what the right thing is, anymore!" -> People may be a bit confused about this one, but believe it or not, it happens more often than you think. Should you transition? Should you wait a few years? Should you try to have this conversation with your parents, cousins, etc?

"But I know...I can't lose, one more friend." -> I don't think, I need to talk about how often people aren't supportive of trans individuals. I could talk more about this, but frankly, I don't need to. It happens, even to this day and age, especially in the current political climate.

To top all of this off, the reason why I singling this part (Aside from this speech being as subtle as the Ruby Gillman movie having the antagonist be a parody of Ariel.) Is the background.

The colors are just like a trans flag.

Now, I had seen people suggest that pointing at this is dumb because "that's just an homage to the covers!"

To which I said, no, this is the homage.

And what the background is doing with Gwen in the speech scene is definitely not the same thing.

I find this argument really funny from an artistic point of view, but in case people are wondering why I don't think it counts, let me number a few things.

The covers do this lighting situation OUTSIDE, they normally depict Gwen being around the city on a landscape when things happen, not indoors. This is both the covers and the sky in Gwen's universe. But we don't see indoor places doing this really.

The colors blend, while you can see buildings and windows have their own colours, you can also see them going from orange, to pink and red on the exact same wall.

If you want even more proof of my support, let me show you what the artbook says about this (which includes the covers.)

My point is, even if we try to argue that the covers had something to do; do you think in a movie where they already have Gwen had a trans flag, her dad had a trans patch; would have a moment when the speech mimics exactly the trans experience (or a big chunk for many people,) with the colors in the background being EXACTLY like a trans a flag, with creators and creative that they have STATED, the importance of color in Gwen's world and in Gwen specifically, somehow just choose colors at random at a pivotal moment of the movie?

And I am somehow the crazy one?

Biases

I like to believe I am a fair person, for the most part. Every time I do these analyses I try to be as impartial as possible, and when I know there is a chance my biases and personal opinion will come into hand, I said that much.

As I said before, I am trans, anyone who has seen at least my master post can probably guess I like Gwen. Having a character I dearly love be trans (Even if our situations are wildly different) obviously means the world to me, and perhaps I would have had a similar headcanon even without any hints or evidence.

Regardless, I don't think what I am saying is purely biased; things are put in movies for a reason, especially animated movies, and let me tell you something, has this been another character, especially if it was a new character? I don't think people would be debating this.

If we have a new character having a trans flag in their room, their dad having a trans patch, this narrative; I doubt anyone would be saying this is coding. (Honestly, we would probably have more dudebros saying this is woke garbage than the ones I had seen lol.)

Alternative theories

Now, since I have addressed the theory and some of its criticism, I can't just ignore the number of people had rather than thinking Gwen is trans, believe someone else is.

Theory 1: Peter is Trans

This isn't odd. Honestly if you had been part of the Spiderman community while being queer, or aware of queer readings, you would have probably come around to the fact that a lot of people headcanon Peter Parker as trans, in multiple different variants in different mediums.

Partially because the spidey-hero situation really mimics the trans experience (there is a reason why you can put Gwen's speech on a come-out scene while simultaneously being about her hero identity without either way sounding forced,) and depending on what source materials, other clues can apply. This post isn't about that and it is already extremely long, so I will not dwell on this.

With this theory in mind, Gwen and her dad would be having trans flag and patch in memory of Peter, since with this theory it was likely that was the reason he was bullied, and probably another reason why to experiment to become the lizard; since being bullied could make him feel like he needs to find a way to be more masculine.

And look, do I have a problem with people thinking Peter is trans? Not really, I encourage it, I personally like the idea that both Gwen and Peter were trans and they bonded over it.

However, I wouldn't want this to be in canon, why?... It feels like it would fall into some harmful stereotypes.

Think about it this way; if we go with this route, a trans teen was bullied, after showing he looks like he is kind of isolated (Gwen seems to have the band at least, Peter looks like he was a loner, and then Gwen started to put distance between them because Spider-woman issues.) Get's so desperate that in an attempt to be "special" (maybe even "better" and "stronger," if he felt he wasn't enough as he was,) tries to experiment with things he shouldn't dying in the process; to which Gwen and her dad then would try to fight for trans rights in his memory, as this theory also heavily implies Peter was bullied because he was trans.

And look, angst narratives had their place, and a lot of people like this narrative, heck I remember a book that does something similar (More than Gold is the name, tho the character doesn't die,) and that was written by a trans person.

Nonetheless, the idea to suggest the only trans person in this narrative, dies after ostracization and bullying, and their purpose on the story as a whole would be to fuel Gwen's pain, with the "protect trans kids" idea only happening partially because of her guilt; feels a lot like "bury your gays (or trans in this case,)" something akin to frigging (while Peter would obviously still consider a boy in this theory, having a character from a minority die to hurt/inspire a protagonist, feels deeply concerning.) Is just a combination of too many things that I dislike.

Again, if someone likes this idea I will not say they are a bad person or anything; but I would have fewer issues if it wasn't because a SIGNIFICANT number of those who said this theory, had also shown to be deeply transphobic; insisting Gwen is obviously not trans with non-arguments. Doesn't need to be everyone, but it still annoys me.

2. Captain Stacy IS the trans one!

This one is...interesting, to say the least.

This one is less frequent than Peter's, but I had seen it pop around enough that I decided to address it.

Unlike Peter's, this one doesn't carry horrible connotations. Well it would have the "only" (if we go with this theory and with no other "canon" trans parent in the story,) trans parent be also the one that tries to point a gun at his daughter, to also be so extremely stubborn even when she finally comes back he acts kind of petulant- okay all of these things are bad, however, they wouldn't need to be related to each other; since none of these are really stereotypes of trans men. That's something?

Anyways, the big idea behind this theory is that aside from being more plausible for an adult to use a trans patch because they are trans rather than because their kid is trans, it could be a possible explanation as to why there is no mom or mention of a mom, since this child could be in vitro.

Which, okay, not that bad; I don't think a lot of trans men would like the idea of being pregnant, however, it has happened before so why not.

I don't think this is a bad theory overall, I just don't roll with it because it feels kind of, lazy? Again, do as you may; but it feels that the people who did it were more interested in again, having an explanation for Gwen not being trans, while also not actively being transphobic. Maybe some people just want more trans dad content I don't know.

There are technically instances of both the Peter theory and the Dad theory that could dethrone both of these, but the one related to Peter makes me feel a bit gross to think too hard about, and the other George one could imply something things that one way or other I don't like when the reality is that is a few frames on a scene where the patch isn't the focus. Another reason is that hey, if I don't have solid evidence on my own, I am not going to nitpick at other fan theories.

Speaking of which.

Is this Representation?

Short answer: No, no it's not.

I don't even want to discuss if is good representation, because it doesn't feel like it is to begin with. Yes, I do believe Gwen is trans, but all the things I have are background references, that are okay, however not having a confirmation does sting. It doesn't have to be the focus of her character, yet is not even off comments really, just some clues around.

Do I think it doesn't have Merit? No.

I remember during the first days this movie was out, I read a comment from someone who was in Florida, who said when they saw the "Protect Trans Kids" flag in Gwen's room, started crying.

I think of myself, almost a decade ago, in a country that wasn't really welcome to gay people, much less trans people; of the discrimination I faced because of it. I think when I was a teen, grappling with all these feelings; and how I would had feel seen the badass and cool, Gwen Stacy as Spider-woman, having that trans flag in their room. I know I would have cried too.

We cannot act like things are perfect currently; the United States, England, and other countries are becoming increasingly transphobic; having these things in a PG movie, from a big company, that is released to a worldwide level and is making bank. Not to mention that as small as these details are, the movie did end up getting banned for it, not even censored.

I think we can get better representation, but it doesn't mean this is less huge or less special; even if it didn't touch me like it would have in the past, it had touched many people, and that's something I appreciate one way or another.

This is in itself, another reason why to love this idea.

Gwen being trans fits the themes of the story better

Stan Lee is obviously, talking about Spider-MAN, but it gets the message across doesn't it?

Part of the reason Spiderman became so iconic, was the idea that ANYONE could be Spiderman, this ended up involved in these movies too.

In Across the Spider-verse, we see multiple types of spiders, people from the future, and past, children, women, men, animals, and a popsicle at one point (literally.) The movie also has Miguel, who is the antagonist, convinced what makes them Spiderman/Spiderwoman/you get the idea- is decided by a cosmic force, with Miles claiming that Spiderman is an idea, a responsibility, but something much more diverse than "you need these events to happen in order to be considered truly spiderman."

In Into the Spider-verse, this idea is also shown, by having spideys that are not just Peter Parker, and how Peter while important, isn't truly the protagonist of this tale, he doesn't need to be.

This franchise hinders the idea that being Spiderman is more than a name, a gender, or your background; is about someone that when given the possibility of using their powers for their own gain or ignoring the call, decides to risk it all, to handle a difficult life, to try to do their best despite the circumstances; because the essence of Spiderman, is being a hero, and anyone can be Spiderman. Anyone can be a hero.

Gwen being trans, elevates this idea.

While I think having more Spider-woman content is empowering on its own, cis woman or trans, the idea of having a trans hero obviously exemplifies this idea more than having her absence.

If Gwen is a trans girl, it would mean having a trans girl who is a tridimensional character, a trans teen that messes up, that doesn't know what to do, but is also a hero, and wants to do her best like everyone else. It means showing a trans girl as someone beautiful, badass, and having a guy who adores her with all his might.

If the idea of having her Peter be trans could be problematic, having her be trans means having a great role model, means a story about trans joy where we are free to be more than our identities, because the idea of Gwen casually being a hero and also trans is amazing in its own.

Is not perfect, but I ultimately love this idea, because it brings me hope. It means comfort for some trans and trans teens suffering out there, it means perhaps someone out there will try to offer more stories on the big screen with trans teens.

I want to believe this because Gwen being trans means more for us and the narrative than it would be otherwise. Let us have our dreams.

#ask #atsv files #gwen stacy #peter parker earth 65 #captain stacy #george stacy #across the spideverse #atsv

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romandaandromeda · 3 months

Text

How Azumanga Daioh tells the difference between the "Old Web" and "Modern Internet"

a content warning for mentions of rape, pedophilia, and ableism (well, better safe than sorry!)

i had an entire thing written before this, but i decided to scrap it for when spacehey comes back online

so, the old web. we know what it is, we know how we see it, geocities, crunchy gifs, flashes and whatever. but have you ever seen the difference between its societies scattered across websites whether it be an imageboard, geocity, or forum against our discorded societies on major social media platforms?

a while back, i had begun watching azumanga daioh as a result of a sudden reinterest in the anime in this decade. this reminded me of how prevalent anime was on the internet as a whole 2 decades ago (and more or less, azumanga's iron grip on anons and lurkers alike), which led me to searching for how different this era was with memes.

memes, or a fad, wasn't very accessible as they are today, while some could be laughed at as an outsider (think awesome face, shoop da whoop, nyan cat, impact font memes), memes outside of the public conscious were mostly inside jokes spawned from forums like something awful or imageboards like 2chan or 4chan.

out of those many, azumanga was one of the more popular ones. think about it, funny teenagers do funny things and combine that with a major love from anime communities, you get things like these:

now what i've noticed about these memes from pre-2010 is their inside joke nature. ask the modern user what a sticky is or why they think osaka is pretending to be a nazi, they wouldn't know or be a bit offput. plus using kaorin's little lesbian crushing on sakaki to project their straight love for sakaki would probably be looked down upon now but that was just normal. if you couldn't handle it then it was either hit the road or deal with it.

you can probably guess that kimura was probably the most relatable character ever in those days, don't even get me started on the normalization of pedophile/rape jokes back then.

now that's fun and all, but how about nowadays? we no longer have a scattered culture, everyone is using one single site for entertainment and posting, and all of the forums and imageboards have been designated a hazard zone as their users have mutated into despicable folks that have been shunned away to the point where they seem more depraved than their past. AKA, they no longer care for relating over a character or talking about a show, they'd rather argue about their nitpicks of a specific character or show and just skulk on what used to be a thriving community. well, nowadays it seems you don't need to be part of a specific community anymore, just see a meme and laugh without any context. with azumanga's revival in interest, this has sort of spawned what i like to call "azumanga autism memes" (TO CLARIFY: I AM AUTISTIC, FEEL FREE TO MAKE UP YOUR OWN NAME IF MINE DOESN'T SOUND RIGHT!). as they've mostly just become the most nonsensical and silly images ever, you practically don't need to watch the show to understand because its so disconnected from the source material it's like a cup of coffee, just pick it up and have a taste.

some examples:

notice anything? suddenly, osaka takes the center stage! with exception to the one chiyo image, osaka has become the face of azumanga as the modern internet knows it. compare that to how every character had about the same love through different edits in the old web, and it seems that most people would think that osaka is the main character of azumanga instead of the multiple characters' stories spread through the series. this has seemed to piss off many a gatekeeper, who are mad that this series is only gaining interest because of one character and her vague memes. to which i believe gatekeeping such a building block of the internet like azumanga is like trying to defend an unstable shack, it's useless.

so, what can we tell from the differences between ye olde and the new? to cut to the chase, the old web's fad culture was built from inside jokes outside of the "webcore/y2k-integrated" memes used for aesthetics. and nowadays people have publicized memes to a point where context is thrown from the picture and anyone can enjoy a meme instead of enjoying its source.

which is better? i can't tell you, you don't see much enjoyability and genuine appreciation in editing in today's memes than you did with old fads (you have to make people laugh, lest you be banished to the "reddit" label hell) but the normalization of taboo topics like racism, rape, and ableism should definitely be left behind in the old. it's just personal preference, really.

that's the end of this post, please enjoy kasuga.swf:

#romanda says stuff #rant #azumanga daioh #i think i sound smart #meme culture #ramblings #rambles

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pansear-doodles · 10 months

Note

as the person who linked the "me when i purposefully spread misinformation on the internet" thing on ur reddit, im sorry for doing it i just though it was a comedy, incredibly sorry for spreading misinformation about misinformation

nah its ok

actually ill reveal it to the tumblr folks now since i care abt you guys over here (i have so many mutuals in tumblr and the community is more tight-knit here): its a harmless prank

just thought to end my artihunter pride month thingy in a bang and also being reminiscent to that one specific artihunter drawing on google image surfaces that keep floating about- where at the time of posting that one i also joked about it being real.

here are the files:

i am sorry to disappoint a lot of people and i do not mean to betray anyone of their trust. i just thought it would be funny (and some of you thought it was fake which is good actually sdfasdfsad). most of my followers are aware i can mimic the art style of the game and thought they would be convinced its fake sooner, though im starting to see a sizeable amount of people who genuinely believe in it.

if you wish to spread this joke around, feel free to, but otherwise- i do not mean this whole event maliciously. (and if some of you have been faking your reactions to me- like a gotcha but gotcha thingy- then thats hilarious) should you choose to reveal this info to reddit and twitter folks, that's your choice.

i suppose this goes to show how easy it is to tamper with the files. it always helps to be always skeptical in the internet.

comparison sake:

also i have a me version of that meme so here

#rain world #rainworld #rainworld downpour #rain world downpour #artihunter #shipping #artificer #hunter #ask

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30fishmen · 9 months

Text

Unknown / Nth analysis

My post got some notes so now you must all read my Hozier lecture. You have no choice.

SOME DISCLAIMERS: I am currently in the process of reading Dante’s The Inferno so most of the information about it is pulled from the internet/prior knowledge that might be completely wrong. Feel free to correct me/add to the post with more information that I left out because I am sure I will leave out something. Also, most of this is my own personal feelings on the matter, art is subjective!! And if you disagree, I would love to hear it, discussion is what makes art and music and fandom fun. With that, onto the lecture.

BACKGROUND: As Hozier himself says in this interview, the song is about Treachery, the ninth circle of hell as Dante describes it in his Inferno. It depicts feelings of betrayal, loneliness, and longing as told from the perspective of God freshly betrayed by the one he most trusted, Lucifer. This is where most of the imagery in the song comes from. (I think that is super cool). I’m also gonna talk about my own interpretation of the song from when I first listened to it, since even without the background knowledge it’s such a powerful song. For convenience, the person singing the song is gonna be called “the speaker” and the person they’re singing to is gonna be called “the betrayer.”

You know the distance never made a difference to me – right off the bat Hozier is crushing our souls. This first line establishes so much love and longing its almost painful- feelings that have persevered despite past obstacles and will continue to persevere for the foreseeable future. The speaker has been separated from the betrayer before (past tense MADE implies this is not a new struggle to them), and the betrayer knows that.

I swam a lake of fire, I’d have walked across the floor of any sea – again, the speaker is proving their devotion by professing the things they have done, and what they are willing to do in the future (I SWAM a lake of fire, I’D HAVE WALKED across the floor of any sea; past tense to future). What I realized after Hozier talked about the inspiration for the song is: this line is referencing how Lucifer got into hell. The “lake of fire” refers to the punishment/imprisonment he received for his betrayal and what he has already endured by being separated from God, the literal and metaphorical hell that he had to go through in order to be in the position he is in. The “floor of any sea” refers to the frozen ocean he is trapped in, the one he is constantly trying to escape. God created this prison, and yet he would have been willing to traverse it.

Ignore the vastness between all that can be seen/and all that we believe/so I thought you were like an angel to me – This line is talking about the reality of the situation versus the image the speaker has in their mind of the betrayer. If they ignore what is actually happening (all that can be seen), they can still remember the betrayer as an angel (all that we believe). Incorporating the divine a little bit, this line could also be talking about the distance between heaven, the mortal realm/earth, and hell.

Funny how true colors shine in darkness and in secrecy – Pretty straightforward as far as the verses in this song go; a slightly ironic tone that acknowledges a betrayer’s tendency to never fully reveal themselves until it’s too late.

If there were scarlet flags, they washed out in the mind of me – Though again ironic and slightly self-deprecating, the message is heart-wrenchingly simple. The speaker loved the betrayer so much they couldn’t see the warning signs of their deceit/ chose to ignore it in favor of looking at all of their goodness. This line begins a phenomenon that I like to call “the Humanization of God.” God is supposed to be all knowing/all-powerful/whatever else you attribute him with. Yet he didn’t see the warning signs of betrayal from his closest friend, something painfully human.

Where a blinding light shone on you every night/and either side of my sleep/where you were held frozen like an angel to me – The “blinding light” this is referring to could mean three things (or all of those things at the same time): 1)it represents a pedestal/spotlight that the betrayer was put upon by the speaker, which is why red flags were so easily ignored. The speaker looked up to the betrayer so much they couldn’t fathom them possibly being anything other than perfect. OR 2) In the third installment of the Divine Comedy, Dante is enveloped by a “blinding light” that raises him up to heaven and allows him to see God. Therefore, the blinding light could reference the divinity Lucifer held before his betrayal, something that God thought would mean he was stuck as (FROZEN, even) an angel, and therefore unable to betray him. OR 3) this verse is talking about Lucifer after he’s already been trapped in hell, with the “blinding light” being the surface he’s trying to escape to. This interpretation would be especially sad because of the line “you were held frozen like an angel to me”, implying that even after his betrayal, God still sees Lucifer as an angel, not as a sinner or a demon. Even without the biblical context, the speaker still holds good memories of the betrayer after all is said and done, choosing to remember them as an “angel” rather than reflect on their horrible acts.

CHORUS TIME- there’s a quote that I always think about when I listen to this chorus: “To be loved but not known is comforting but superficial. To be known and not loved is our greatest fear. But to be fully known and truly loved is, well, a lot like being loved by God.”

It ain’t the being alone/It ain’t the empty home baby/You know I’m good on my own - the speaker has very clearly been alone before, which is sad because it implies that the betrayer is the one who alleviated this loneliness, providing company where there previously was none. Now that they’re gone, they’re back to being alone. Also the implication that the speaker confided in the betrayer about this past loneliness (YOU know I’m good on my own) makes their abandonment so much more heartbreaking.

Sha-la-la, baby, you know, it’s more the being unknown – Something new to the speaker, though, is the feeling of being unknown. God has always been placed on a pedestal, with no one to keep him company except his angels. Lucifer was the first angel, known as the angel of Light, and was someone God trusted and confided in. God thought he knew Lucifer, just as Lucifer knew him, and now with his closest friend gone, he must return to that lonely position of power, unknown to any other angel or worshipper as anyone other than God- distant, all powerful, unapproachable God. And maybe this betrayal is what forced God up into heaven in the first place, doomed to never again be known as he was by Lucifer. In a way, that’s almost exactly like the punishment he’s given to his betrayer.

So much of the living, love, is the being unknown – This line reads surprisingly hopeful to me. It’s an acknowledgement of the situation, sort of saying “oh well, that’s life” to the most famous betrayal of all time. The most important part about this line is the tone; there’s no bitterness, no resentment of the circumstances or the people that have led them to this situation.

You called me angel for the first time, my heart leapt from me – This line is talking about the first time the betrayer and the speaker met, and how that interaction affected the speaker. It also speaks to how much one person can be changed by another’s affection. As soon as the speaker was called angel, their heart was no longer their own, trusted entirely to the betrayer to use as they will. It also seems the decision was at least a little bit unwilling on the speaker’s part (the phrase “leapt FROM ME” implies unwillingness; the speaker didn’t GIVE their heart away, it jumped from their grasp). Point is, the speaker was definitely in denial about how close they were to the betrayer. Another instance of humanizing God in the context of the story, for though he is often depicted as loving, you never really think of him as having a heart to be broken or to be given away to his most trusted.

You smile now, I can see its pieces still stuck in your teeth – the imagery in this line is insane; the speaker’s heart was literally chewed up and spit out by the betrayer by their act. The fact that literal scraps are seen in a SMILE shows the betrayer still deceiving, trying to placate/make friends with the speaker even as their heart is in literal pieces because of their mouth. This is also another reference to the Inferno- Lucifer is described as a three-headed demon, with each of his mouths chewing on the bible’s/history’s greatest betrayers: Brutus, Longinus, and Judas. Brutus and Longinus are being punished for their role in Julius Caesar’s assassination by being stuck feet-first in Lucifer’s mouth. Judas receives the worst punishment of the three; his head is being chewed on while his back gets scraped up by Lucifer’s claws.

And what’s left of it, I listen to it tick/every tedious beat/going unknown as any angel to me – This. Line. Oh my god. Even in the teeth of their betrayer, torn to shreds, the speaker’s heart is still beating and alive, just as their love for the betrayer is. And after thinking it over (“listening to their heart”), they realize that maybe they don’t know their own heart as well as they thought. Because what heart would love a betrayer? (A HUMAN ONE, PROBABLY. HUMANIZATION OF GOD.) Also, the use of angel, not as a term of endearment as it was previously, but in reference to a group (unknown as ANY angel, rather than MY angel or THE angel) indicates both God’s realization that he didn’t know Lucifer as well as he thought and a resolution to never trust or hold another angel as close ever again.

AND NOW FOR MY FAVORITE PART!!!!!!!! BY FAR THE BEST PART OF THE WHOLE SONG IN MY OPINION. Setting aside the lyrics and the meaning of the song, just the pure power of Hozier’s voice in this section gets me every time. So much of a change from the easygoing guitar that’s made up the rest of the song- there’s like a heavenly chorus behind him, he’s singing at the top of his lungs louder and higher than any other part, it’s just so…. I don’t even know how to explain it. It’s so good.

Do you know I could break beneath the weight?/Of the goodness, love, I still carry for you – Personally, I think the “goodness” that is being described here is the speaker’s hope that the betrayer is still a good person, deep down inside. It’s a hope that is futile and slowly “breaking” the speaker, because the deed has already been done, yet the speaker still carries it. In addition to that, I like to think that the responsibility of heaven was shared between God and Lucifer before his betrayal, and now without him, God is forced to carry the weight and pressure of being the divine creator of the universe all alone.

That I’d walk so far just to take/The injury of finally knowing you – Referencing the line earlier in song (I’d have walked across the floor of any sea) and again stressing the lengths the speaker is willing to go for the betrayer. The best part about this line is, again, the acknowledgement of pain by the speaker. They specifically say “the INJURY of finally knowing you”, meaning that fully, truly knowing the betrayer as they want to would cause lasting harm. Also, the realization that, as things currently stand, the speaker DOESN’T know the betrayer (hence the use of the word finally, implying future), and to know them completely would mean to know the reasons WHY they betrayed the speaker, which would certainly cause “injury.” Yet the speaker DOESN’T CARE. They don’t CARE how hurt they are by the betrayer, how much it WILL HURT in the future, they just want to be with them and if that isn’t the saddest thing-

The closing chorus is mostly the same as it was before (it ain’t the being alone/it ain’t the empty home baby/you know I’m good on my own/sha-la-la, baby, you know, it’s more the being unknown) except for the final line.

And there are some people, love, who are better unknown – my initial reaction to this line was that it sounded surprisingly hopeful considering the rest of the song, much like the line in the first appearance of the chorus. I took it to mean that the speaker accepted the fact that the betrayer was bad for them, and maybe it’s better off that they don’t know them. But looking back at all the analysis about how far the speaker would go, all the injury they are willing to put themselves through, that just doesn’t make much sense (Plus the fact that the speaker still says “love”). No, that wouldn’t be the Hozier way. Instead, I think this line is the speaker blaming themselves. Saying that THEY are the ones who are better unknown, because they’ve tried the whole love and trust thing and look how that turned out. Consider the character of the speaker that’s been built throughout the entire song: someone who gone through hell and is still willing to go farther for someone who clearly won’t do the same, someone who ignored red flags in favor of focusing on the good, someone who trusted their heart to a person who chewed it up without a second thought. This is definitely a person to take betrayal personally, to turn on and blame themselves rather than get angry at the betrayer, the actual person at fault. The rest of the chorus and previous analysis supports this too (speaker is ok with being alone/on their own, but they are NOT ok with being unknown. So, to inflict that on themselves is a fitting punishment). Also, the speaker being the self-blaming person they are, this line could be read as sort of an apology; if they hadn’t let themselves be known, let themselves open up to the betrayer, maybe neither of them would be hurting this much in the first place. It might’ve been better if the speaker had STAYED unknown and alone as they were before knowing the betrayer.

This whole analysis is a cumulation of all the thoughts that have been fermenting in my brain for the past month, so if it’s a bit nonsensical I do apologize. Also, huge shoutout to my friend for listening to my insane ramblings and also helping me edit this, she doesn’t have a tumblr but I appreciate her immensely.

That’s all I got for now, if this gets some traction maybe I’ll post my thoughts about some other Hozier songs (because holy shit are his songs amazing). If you got this far down thank you so much for reading! It feels really good to put all the words down and actually organize them, and knowing that there are people who actually want to read it is so cool.

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#unknown / nth #hozier #andrew hozier byrne #unreal unearth #francesca #dante #the inferno #music #lyrics #lyric analysis #music analysis #song #song analysis

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