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#sometimes you have to get yourself out and never look back and that is valid and healthy
seagreenstardust · 2 months
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“When toxic behavior is portrayed as romantic, it’s problematic. When problematic behavior is portrayed as a character flaw for a character to work through, it’s good storytelling.”
Katsuki Bakugou, my friends.
His behavior was problematic but never once portrayed as romantic at the same time. Katsuki said and did awful abusive things, and he also chose to be better when he was given the chance. If you’re still hung up on chapter 1 Katsuki now then I don’t think you’ve been reading the same story I have.
I can’t speak for everyone, but I’m not shipping Izuku with an irredeemable abuser. I’m shipping him with his most important person. His narrative foil. His childhood friend who made awful mistakes and then made it right when he saw he was wrong. The person Izuku looks up to and strives to emulate, despite their past struggles.
Bakudeku is so good because of how flawed these boys are, and how hard they’ve worked to get over it, and how much they matter to each other after it all
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transphilza · 2 years
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reminder that numbers on social media don’t define you and if they’re causing you distress it’s helpful to step away or distract yourself. just for your mental health’s sake, i really do implore that you try not to constantly monitor your like/reblog ratios and maybe even turn off notifications if you find yourself anxious about how much attention your posts are/aren’t getting. take care of yourself ❤️
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inkskinned · 9 months
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you're grabbing lunch with a nice man and he gives you that strange grimace-smile that's popular right now; an almost sardonic "twist" of his mouth while he looks literally down on you. it looks like he practiced the move as he leans back, arms folded. he just finished reciting the details of NFTs to you and explaining Oppenheimer even though he only watched a youtube about it and hasn't actually seen it. you are at the bottom of your wine glass.
you ask the man across from you if he has siblings, desperately looking for a topic. literally anything else.
he says i don't like small talk. and then he smiles again, watching you.
a few years ago, you probably would have said you're above celebrity gossip, but honestly, you've been kind of enjoying the dumb shit of it these days. with the rest of the earth burning, there's something familiar and banal about dragging ariana grande through the mud. you think about jeanette mccurdy, who has often times gently warned the world she's not as nice as she appears. you liked i'm glad my mom died but it made you cry a lot.
he doesn't like small talk, figure out something to say.
you want to talk about responsibility, and how ariana grande is only like 6 days older than you are - which means she just turned 30 and still dresses and acts like a 13 year old, but like sexy. there's something in there about the whole thing - about insecurity, and never growing up, and being sexualized from a young age.
people have been saying that gay people are groomers. like, that's something that's come back into the public. you have even said yourself that it's just ... easier to date men sometimes. you would identify as whatever the opposite of "heteroflexible" is, but here you are again, across from a man. you like every woman, and 3 people on tv. and not this guy. but you're trying. your mother is worried about you. she thinks it's not okay you're single. and honestly this guy was better before you met, back when you were just texting.
wait, shit. are you doing the same thing as ariana grande? are you looking for male validation in order to appease some internalized promise of heteronormativity? do you conform to the idea that your happiness must result in heterosexuality? do you believe that you can resolve your internal loneliness by being accepted into the patriarchy? is there a reason dating men is easier? why are you so scared of fucking it up with women? why don't you reach out to more of them? you have a good sense of humor and a big ol' brain, you could have done a better job at online dating.
also. jesus christ. why can't you just get a drink with somebody without your internal feminism meter pinging. although - in your favor (and judgement aside) in the case of your ariana grande deposition: you have been in enough therapy you probably wouldn't date anyone who had just broken up with their wife of many years (and who has a young child). you'd be like - maybe take some personal time before you begin this journey. like, grande has been on broadway, you'd think she would have heard of the plot of hamlet.
he leans forward and taps two fingers to the table. "i'm not, like an andrew tate guy," he's saying, "but i do think partnership is about two people knowing their place. i like order."
you knew it was going to be hard. being non-straight in any particular way is like, always hard. these days you kind of like answering the question what's your sexuality? with a shrug and a smile - it's fine - is your most common response. like they asked you how your life is going and not to reveal your identity. you like not being straight. you like kissing girls. some days you know you're into men, and sometimes you're sitting across from a man, and you're thinking about the power of compulsory heterosexuality. are you into men, or are you just into the safety that comes from being seen with them? after all, everyone knows you're failing in life unless you have a husband. it almost feels like a gradebook - people see "straight married" as being "all A's", and anything else even vaguely noncompliant as being ... like you dropped out of the school system. you cannot just ignore years of that kind of conditioning, of course you like attention from men.
"so let's talk boundaries." he orders more wine for you, gesturing with one hand like he's rousing an orchestra. sir, this is a fucking chain restaurant. "I am not gonna date someone who still has male friends. also, i don't care about your little friends, i care about me. whatever stupid girls night things - those are lower priority. if i want you there, you're there."
he wasn't like this over text, right? you wouldn't have been even in the building if he was like this. you squint at him. in another version of yourself, you'd be running. you'd just get up and go. that's what happens on the internet - people get annoyed, and they just leave. you are locked in place, almost frozen. you need to go to the bathroom and text someone to call you so you have an excuse, like it's rude to just-leave. like he already kind of owns you. rudeness implies a power paradigm, though. see, even your social anxiety allows the patriarchy to get to you.
you take a sip of the new glass of wine. maybe this will be a funny story. maybe you can write about it on your blog. maybe you can meet ariana grande and ask her if she just maybe needs to take some time to sit and think about her happiness and how she measures her own success.
is this settling down? is this all that's left in your dating pool? just accepting that someone will eventually love you, and you have to stop being picky about who "makes" you a wife?
you look down to your hand, clutching the knife.
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capricores · 9 months
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if you have strong mutable (gemini, sagittarius, pisces, virgo) placements then you NEED to write things down if you don't already. all those thoughts that constantly swirl in your head: the frequent tasks, goals, feelings, aspirations, opinions, etc - WRITE THEM DOWN. this is not only therapeutic & stress-relieving for you but almost necessary, or you're going to burn out and overload your own mind constantly.
when you bottle, or when you let plans, goals, dreams, to-do lists, projects, etc live solely in your head - you'll notice you can't sleep as well, it's harder to rest, your memory gets more foggy than usual, you feel burnt out and unable to connect, etc. specifically:
write down your feelings. this will be your ultimate (free) therapy. start to journal, write a diary. make a private twitter/tumblr where you spill your feelings, frustrations, thoughts. you will feel an immense sense of relief by writing or typing your feelings out - even if no one is reading it but you. mutable moons especially. our feelings tend to change rapidly, but it doesn't make them less valid. don't bottle out of the fear your feelings will change/you'll just "get over it"!! write it down and let it out!!
write! to-do! lists!!!!! these don't have to be for important things. you want to learn digital art? you want to study coding? you want to learn french? you want to re-decorate? you probably have a billion things you want to do, and then you get overwhelmed by the options, and do nothing. write down all the things you want to do. make a to-do list for these things. get them out of your head and somewhere permanent/physical. looking at the options in front of you will feel much easier.
make excel project trackers (you can even make these for to-do list items/goals/etc)! mutable placements have a tendency to start a lot of projects or tasks, and never finish any of them. make a simple tracker for all the projects you start. you won't forget what you're working on, and you'll be less overwhelmed trying to remember what you have going on (example of the one i always use pictured below)
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talking out your thoughts and feelings is also very cathartic. make fake (or real, i support u!) youtube vlogs where you spill your feelings and talk about your plans, your day, what you have to do, etc. talk to someone you love and trust, vent to them about how things are; or about what you're getting up to. i find writing has an edge, because you can go back to it for reference (mutables tend to forget things easily) - but as long as you're getting the swirl of your mind somewhere outside of your head, you'll feel so, so much less stressed.
mutable dominants tend to constantly live in go-mode, we're restless and always doing something. we feel uncomfortable and sometimes guilty about staying still. our minds don't ever shut off. it's very important for mutable placements to learn how to rest, be present in the moment, and learn grounding. this can be done in many ways, but i've found personally that writing works best for me. other helpful practices can be: talk therapy, acceptance theory, yoga, meditation, hiking, camping, etc.
i also want to remind mutable signs: we change a lot. we have a lot of ideas. there's so much we want to do. we often feel like we have no path, no big goal; we can struggle with purpose as we don't often aspire for permanent things or "one big goal". this is NOT bad. there is nothing wrong with changing your feelings, your mind, your goals, your life path. you CAN do all the things you want to do! you have your entire life ahead of you! yes, you can learn all those languages. yes, you can have three different careers in your life. yes yes yes! don't listen to negativity from others. don't beat yourself up for not having one big goal like some people around you might. cherish and embrace all the things you want to achieve and complete (both big and small). learn to follow-through with and finish the things that matter to you (writing things down will really help with this, make action plans/steps - break everything down into smaller pieces). take the time to slow down and enjoy the moments as they come. you got this!
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strwberri-milk · 6 months
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The "s/o crying in her sleep because she misses him" prompt is absolutely wonderful so I'm here for a request of that prompt with Childe, Wriothesley and Lyney. Love you and your works so much. Hope you have a good day!
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Childe knows that his hours aren't exactly great when it comes to trying to maintain a healthy work/life balance. You're used to him coming and leaving at all hours of the day and are used to adjusting your schedule accordingly.
He tries his best to tell you what he'll be doing for the week so the two of you can figure out when you'll have time to spend with each other. After all, it's not like he ever stops thinking about you when he goes to work. In fact, it's exactly the opposite - you're always preoccupying his mind, no matter how focused it seems he is.
After a solid week of coming home far later than you go to bed, Childe's happy to report that he's got some time off for the coming days. He wasn't going to wake you up just to tell you, but he was going to start by cuddling you up as the two of you slept. In his euphoria he almost missed the sound of you crying as he stood in the doorway, heart breaking as he sees the way you're curled in on yourself trying to hold back your tears.
Silently, he slips into bed behind you and pulls you into his chest, letting your tears wet his shirt. He shushes you gently, letting you cry as much as he needs to as he whispers apologies into your hair.
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Wriothesley is prone to getting a little too caught up in his work. He's got a lot of things and people to keep an eye on, meaning that sometimes you end up sleeping in a cold bed. You normally don't mind but after a while of never seeing him it really starts to weigh on you.
You spend another lonely evening getting ready for bed, trying not to dwell on the fact too much. You know that Wriothesley is an important man and that he's got lots to attend to. It never means he loves you any less - it's just a testament to how incredible he is.
It ends up not doing anything for you as you cry yourself to sleep anyway, trying to bury your sobs in the pillow. You don't notice he's there until you feel him pull you into his chest, strong arms wrapping around your midsection as he buries his face into your neck.
He doesn't say anything but you know he's sorry with the way his fingers trace circles on your stomach, the weight of his body on your back, the gentle kisses he presses on your neck. All of it reminds you that he's here, and no matter where it is that he is, he'll always be yours.
You do notice that he makes a concentrated effort to carve out time in his busy day for you. He doesn't mention what happened that night too overtly, but you know it weighs on him when he's unable to come to bed with you.
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Lyney hears you almost as soon as he walks through the door, suddenly realising just how busy he's been the last couple of weeks. You can hear his footsteps heading straight towards you and try to hurriedly wipe away your tears only to be confronted by him.
He's upset to know that you've been crying, even more so when he manages to get you to confess that it's because you miss him. He sits down next to you on the bed, pulling you into his lap. You're looking up at him, willing the last of your tears to go away to no avail. He easily wipes them away, resting his palm against your forehead as he looks down at you affectionately.
You ramble a little about how you don't want him to be mad and you just couldn't exactly place it but there was just this underlying feeling of anxiety and sadness that came from being without him and it all just came to a head. He listens with an emphatic ear, stroking his thumb across your cheek as you talk to him.
Once you've got all your feelings out he apologises for accidentally ignoring you. Even if he didn't mean it, that doesn't mean that your feelings aren't valid, and he wants you to know that. He tells you that next time if you're feeling this way you should bring it up, giving you a soft kiss on the lips to reinforce his words. You agree, knowing that he said it because he means it and you know that he'll keep his promise.
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sinswithpleasure · 3 months
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To-Do List: Cream & Coffee
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Thank @friskyriskywhisky for this fic. Without him, I'd never write Minju.
Kinks: Public Sex, Magical Mischief, Blasphemy (really, this fic is that).
—------—
Sometimes, you forget Minju is an angel. 
She’s an angel, of course, but she’s also an angel, in every sense of the word. As in, “be not afraid” angel, as in miracles type, heaven-born angel. She embodies purity, compassion, kindness, and all that is holy and good with… well, almost every action she takes. 
Of course, you’d questioned it before: “Almost? Aren’t angels perfect?” It’s a valid question, and Minju corrects you every time you mention it: “Not perfect—blameless. Also, the rules have relaxed a bit! That’s why I’m always around you humans!”
If your next question is about what exactly Minju isn’t good and holy about, she’s had an answer for that too, with a wink and a smile: “Everyone says I’m mischievous, so it’ll only be a while before you’ll find out~.”
And find out you have—thoroughly, even. Minju seems to orbit around you a lot, and you’ve been roped into her schemes one too many times, much of which bring far too much risk for you. However, there’s no denying the satisfaction those schemes bring though—Minju makes sure you benefit too, whenever she decides to pull one of her tricks. Win-win scenarios are her bread and butter, she says, with a little swish of her hand and soft glow from her eyes, because “a few heavenly miracles don’t hurt anyone”. Far too many times she’s used it to get both you and her out of trouble, and you swear she’s way too mischievous and curious for anyone’s own good. It’s this mischief of hers that leads you to constantly remind yourself that she’s celestial, even if she doesn’t carry herself like one.
As you sip your coffee, Minju’s fork clatters against her plate, and she leans back with her signature smirk. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that she’s acting up again. 
“Yah, Minsik.” Minju calls for you. “I—”
“No, whatever it is, no.” You’re quick to shut her down. “I’m not about to do whatever it is you’ve thought up.”
“I didn’t even say what it was!” Minju’s pouting now, arms crossed over her letterman jacket, looking every bit like a petulant child. “You’re no fun.”
“That’s because every scheme you put me up to involves us doing something that could get us jailed.” 
“But I always get us out, don’t I?” Minju sulks, but it morphs into a grin quickly after. “And you can’t lie to me about how good I always make you feel when I make you try anything I think up.”
The memories instantly come flowing back—Minju on your bed, Minju on her knees, Minju on your lap, Minju bent over a desk, Minju against the wall. In some of these memories, Minju is naked, and in the others, she’s clothed in varying degrees. With these thoughts in your head, your body betrays your mind—your cock begins to harden in your pants, and you shift your legs to attempt to hide your bulge, even if Minju doesn’t have it in line of sight. 
“Yeah, I can’t, but what happened to ‘just having a normal afternoon drinking coffee and eating cakes’, Minju? We can’t even have that anymore?” 
“Oh, shut up, you.” Minju’s mischievous grin only grows bigger. “You can’t lie to me, you’re getting horny just remembering what we’ve done.”
“No I’m not.” You lean back in your chair, coffee in hand, taking a sip through the straw. Even if the effort is futile, you’d do it anyway just to spite Minju. 
Minju rises from her chair, and she slowly sashays around the table. You take advantage of this moment to ogle her thighs in her jeans—her body is nothing but perfect. She bends down right in front of you, her grin now stretching from ear to ear as she notes your reactions.
“Liar. You know I can tell when humans lie.” 
Minju leans in close to whisper her proposition.
“I think we should have some fun, Minsik.”
You sigh in resignation, then take the bait. “What kind of fun, Minju?”
“Well…” The angel stands back up and winks. “I’ve never had sex in a cafe before.” 
With a wave of her wrist, white light glows from her eyes, and the world around you ripples, as if it were water. You take a moment to enjoy the visual effects on the world around you. In that time, Minju closes the distance—she straddles you and plants herself on your lap, your bulge pressing right against her body. 
“Liar.” Minju repeats, smirking. “You said you weren’t horny.” She crosses her arms as she grabs the hem of her white tee, and you watch in barely restrained lust as the angel on your lap peels her shirt off her. As the cloth rises above her head, her petite, yet perfect breasts greet your eyes as she drops her shirt on the table behind her. Once again, no bra—the angel despises underwear, having “not needed any of it for the entire time I’ve been an angel”, something which you definitely have no complaints about. Minju rests her arms over your shoulder, and she grinds down on your bulge as she softly groans in pleasure. You join her in vocalizing your pleasure, all pretenses dropped, and you hold the angel steady by her hips as you grind into her too.
“It’s great to be an angel.” Minju sighs softly and bites her lip down on a particularly hard grind. “I can just cloak anytime and enjoy having sex, and no one would know.”
“You’re so corrupted, Minju.” You shift your hands up to caress the angel’s body, and she whines in pleasure when you cup one of her breasts in your palm, soft kneads and squeezes of her flesh drawing more sounds of pleasure from her. The angel only laughs, and she denies it with a wave of her wrist. “Heh, no I’m not. I just do what I enjoy doing, and no one’s going to stop me. Not the old man next to us with his newspaper, not the lady to your left working on her financial reports, not the baristas behind me, and most of all,” Minju’s pointer finger pushes against your chest as she taps you three times, “Definitely not you.” 
The angel is right—you’re not stopping her at all. Even as the old man to your right shakes his paper to get a better grip on it, even as the businesswoman to your left takes a glance in your direction, you’re not protesting at all when Minju’s hand trails down to undo your pants and zipper. You’re still fondling Minju’s bare breasts, and the angel leans in to push her lips against yours. No one can see you—the angel’s magic ensures that. She only lets the people see what she wants them to see, and right now, she wants them to see nothing at all. 
“Mm, so hard for me, that’s good.” Minju has her hand over your bulge now, having shifted down to your lap, and she only gives you a cursory few rubs before she withdraws her hand, to your disappointment. That doesn’t last long though—the angel begins to undo your pants, and she pulls your hard, twitching shaft out from underneath your zipper. She wraps her hand around it, soft slow strokes along your length drawing soft groans from your lips, groans that she silences with a hot kiss. Her tongue meets yours in the middle, and you pull her tighter against you, eager to feel her body against yours. However, Minju pulls herself back now, her weight leaving your lap as she gets off you. 
“Minju—”
“Shhh…” The angel giggles at the look of desperate need all over your face. “Give me just a second~.”
It happens in an instant—Minju is on your left one moment, and then in a blink of an eye, she’s on your right. The only difference between both of them is this: the Minju on your left seconds ago had her jeans still on, and the Minju on your right has them off. The angel is naked right next to you, her thighs glistening with her arousal as she straddles you again. It is at this point you notice that you’re naked too, your clothes and hers in a neatly folded pile on her chair. 
“This is cheating, Minju.”
“And who’s keeping score, Minsik?” Minju stands over you, her lips softly brushing against yours in a ghost of a kiss. “This little miracle doesn’t hurt anyone, does it? Especially if it gets us closer to having sex.” The angel lifts her legs one by one to fold them up over either of yours, almost as if to kneel right in your lap, her ankles supporting her weight with your help. Her knees are in the air next to both of your thighs. You instinctively grab Minju by the hips and ass while she balances herself, and she grins when she grabs your cock to brush it right against her labia, the moan torn from your lips exactly what she wants to hear.
“Mm, I love this part.” Minju exhales in stutters, the hot breath brushing against your lips. “The part where I drip all over the cock I’m about to fuck.”
And drip all over it she does. Minju coats your cock with a sheen of her slick, her hand helping to spread it all over with soft strokes once more. She takes a glance to see how aroused both you and her are, and the angel only giggles at your dazed expression of lust, pleasure, and anticipation when she looks back up. 
“Oh my God, Minju…”
“Hey, not in vain.” The angel jokingly chastises, as she always does. “I’ll smite you.”
“Do your worst,” is your challenge.
“That I will.” Minju lines you up with her hole, and in one stroke, she slams herself down on your cock. You moan out loud as Minju takes you to the hilt instantly. A loud whine of pleasure accompanies your moans as well, before Minju shakily breathes, “Just. Like. That.”
Just like that, she says. Just like that, you’re having sex with Minju, again, on her whim. The angel “smites” you over and over with her hips, engulfing your cock in her velvety, warm, tight cunt with every time she impales herself on your shaft. She takes to sex like a fish to water—you have no idea how, no idea why, and neither do you care or have ever cared. What you do care about right now is how she bounces herself on your cock, every stroke reaching deep into her as she fucks herself down on your length. Neither of you hide your moans as the world carries on around you—the cafe’s patrons are none the wiser about the sexual activities just inches away from them. This knowledge excites both Minju and you— as she fucks herself down on you hard, the almost-crazed joy displayed in her eyes from having such wanton public sex is mirrored in yours as well. Minju is a godsend—figuratively and literally—that has you able to do things you’ve only dreamed of in your wild fantasies, and you’re going to enjoy it for as long as you can.
“You’re hitting me right there every time, Minsik~!” Minju’s G-spot rubs against your shaft with every stroke of hers, and you thrust up in time with her as well. Your loud, vulgar exclamations of pleasure mix with Minju’s own, and the claps of her flesh against yours as well as the wet sounds of her pussy milking your cock only leave you both more and more aroused.
“Oh, fuck, Minju, fuck, you’re so tight, fuck!” The angel’s cunt massages your shaft, as if trying its best to coax your cum out of you as soon as possible. Her pussy is incredibly tight, and the pleasure you derive from it has you close to orgasm already. Minju is no better—she’s softly muttering about how close she is right next to your ear, her pussy drenching your cock and balls in her arousal, walls getting tighter and tighter as she gets close to her peak. 
“Fuck, Minsik, make me cum, make me cum together with you, make me cum all over your cock—”
From experience, you know Minju’s a talker, and her words only push you to thrust up into her harder, deeper, faster as you chase your high with her. The girl on your lap fucks herself on your cock in time with your thrusts, and both of you wrap your arms around each other however you can, pulling each other tight against the other as you hit your combined peaks simultaneously. 
“Oh, Minju, I—”
“Minsik~!”
Neither of you bother holding back your moans as you orgasm together. Minju’s hips buck against your faltering thrusts, her juices flowing down all over your lap as jets of squirt drench your lower half. Even as your hips stutter, you keep fucking into Minju as well as you can—burst after burst of thick white cum shoots deep into the angel’s tight cunt, and with every thrust, you push your load deeper and deeper into her, prolonging the pleasure both of you enjoy. The carnal pleasure seems to last forever, and both of you hold each other tightly as waves after waves of it wash over your bodies. Both of you make a mess where you sit—Minju’s juices mix with your overflowing load on the chair and the floor beneath you, and the air smells of sex. You hug the angel in your embrace as your highs subside, and she pushes herself off you urgently, though the smile on her face promises she means no offense.
“Don’t get mushy on me, fucker.”
“Shut up.” You help Minju off you, and your cock twitches when you fully exit her—thick drops of cum fall from her freshly fucked hole onto your shaft, and you can’t help but groan when you see it. 
“Already wanting a round two, Minsik? We can make it happen.” Minju giggles as she reaches a hand beneath to collect your flowing excess, then raises it to lick it all off. “You always taste so nice.”
“Oh my God, shut up, Minju…” You chuckle to yourself, the corrupted angel joining you as she grabs her clothes. With a wave of her wrist, both you and her are clothed, the mess beneath you cleaned up, and you’re both right back where you started—a normal afternoon drinking coffee and eating cakes.
“This was fun, Minsik.” Minju’s eyes flash with mischief once more. “I wonder where we can do it next…”
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shapard · 2 months
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Feather of Fate 🕊️
Lucifer x fem!seraphim!reader
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Soulmate arc
Lilith being weird
Saturn
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Chapter 6 < Chapter 7 > Chapter 8
You’ve never felt this out of place before. 
Even in heaven it wasn't this awkward.
You were sitting beside Lucifer who hasn’t talked since you’ve arrived here in the main lobby. 
Lilith was sitting in front of you all like she hasn’t been missing for 7 years.
Walking around as if she owns this place. And it angered you.
Charlie was happy to see her mom again after such a long time, but also was hella confused. 
Why is she here all of the sudden right before the extermination day? Charlie wasn't the only one who thought of this.
You too are confused at this ordinary timing.
Angel dust was concerned about you. 
You and Lucifer were now official but the appearance of Lucifers ex-wife was very overwhelming for you, and Angel could see it. 
And one guy was not even presence, and that was Alastor. 
Weird. 
Normally he’s always there when someone new arrived in here. 
“Who are you?” Nifty broke the silence, and all eyes were now on her. 
Lilith choose to Ignore Nifty, and she pouted. “So, you’re… His new girl?” Lilith asked looking you up and down. With her gaze lingering now on her you felt insecure somehow.
You hugged yourself to look smaller.
You nodded your head 'yes', even though you didn’t like the tone Lilith gave you. 
“She’s his girlfriend and she has a name big tits.” Angel said raising his eyebrows.
He didn’t trust her.
Not at all.
Lilith smirked and leaned back in her seat.
“I don't care. Really her Lu?” Lilith looked over at Lucifer and he looked shortly back.
his gaze went quickly to the ground.
It was obvious that Lilith still had Lucifer in her fingers, and it pissed you off. 
“Excuse me?” You decided to interrupt her cruel speaking.
She looked at you in surprise, and you huff in annoyance.
“You really think you can just come over here and talk here as if this place belongs to you.
Sorry for breaking the news to you, but you’re no longer the owner of this house, nor do you have the right to come here to Insult your ex.
You left him and I’m here. No refunds.” You Shaked your head, Angel dust smirked at you come back. 
He’s so proud of you.
Lucifer smiled, every day he gets more reasons to love you. 
“What are you even doing here?” Lucifer finally looked at Lilith and he felt nothing. 
No Love, no sadness. 
Lilith bit her lip hard, drawing blood. “Can’t I visit my little daughter.”
Lucifer raised his eyebrow, “You never visit nor called her in over 7 years. What changed!” No one gets after his daughter, not even her Mother.
Not even Lilith.
Lilith patient was running thin, she scratched with her nail into the wood piece from the couch breaking her nails in the process. 
She took a breath in and out. “I had a lot of important things to do.” 
Now y’all were raising a brow at this statement, besides Charlie.
She had faith for the first time that her mother wants to see her again. 
But you all had a valid point, why now? 
“It seems no one wants me here. I’ll leave, but I will come back.”
She looked now at Lucifer smiling at his angered face. ‘you’ll see’ She mouthed at him, he pointed towards the door.
And she left.
“That was way too easy.” Husk said that what all thought. She left you all dumbfounded. 
It was way too easy.
Angel shifted towards you and Lucifer. “So, you two a thing now?” You nod your head and smile brightly. 
He wanted to change the topic so you don't overthink all of this, and it worked successfully.
Charlie bounced up and down dismissing the weird visit from her mother. She's so excited for the two of you.
Charlie is a cutie pie, and you love everything about her. She is just like her father, the pros so the cons. Both just want to do their best for their beloved.
Even though they sometimes fuck up, it is always meant in a good way.
“You said It yourself seconds ago. Why are you even asking?” Lucifer asked and rested his chin on your shoulder.
He loves that he's shorter than you. Every time you two hugged he was always between your boobs. Even though he wears a hat to look taller.
Angel just shrugged and continued to drink his Malibu with his well known smile.
… Time Skip...
Lucifer paced around your room, and you watched his every move. 
You stood up and hugged his waist looking down into his eyes. Sometimes he was looking at you, but they travelled through the whole room most of the time.
“Luci, calm down. Nothing happened we are fine.” His strand fell in front of his eyes, and you put it back to its place, Lucifer clicked his tongue.
“That’s what’s worrying me. Why didn’t she do anything? I know Lilith since the start of earth, she wouldn’t just leave in those situations without a reason.” 
Lucifer leaned into you embrace letting out a distressed sigh. 
"Don't worry about it. You're one of the strongest beings, she wouldn't dare to put out a fight like Michael did." Lucifers sighs, you're probably right.
_____
“You just left?!” Michael laughed biting at his fresh manicured nail. 
His women staff around him tensed up, wanting nothing more than to leave.
Michael sent them away. They ran as fast as they could out of the room.
“And you didn’t even spy on them? Tried anything to get useful Information?! I really wonder why you divorced him and not the other way around.” He breathed in and threw a glass cup next to Lilith. 
“But you just LEFT?!” 
He shook his head, his eyes shining in pure blue. 
“They’re soulmates.” She whispered. Not looking at him with his icy cold eyes.
She hated that look in his eyes he was giving her.
He looked at her like she is a piece of garbage, something he should've got disposed of.
Something that now molds in one of his cabinets.
the only reason why she is still alive was her use for him.
And something else they both tried to hide and undo.
Michael’s mark burned in protest but it won’t stop him to punish Lilith.
“NO SHIT!” he leaned his hand in his palm trying to calm down. massaging his forehead hardy leaving a red fingerprint.
“Your plan failed Michael. It worked for a couple of Months but not longer. It seemed their bond grew stronger.” A loud bang echoed the icy cold halls in Michael’s mansion. 
The temperature was starting to get colder and colder. 
Ice started to grow around Lilith holding her tight in place. “I should’ve killed you a long time ago.”
He stood in front of Lilith cutting her cheek open with the same knife your blood was spilled. 
“I- I- have an idea!” Michael removed the knife from her cheek with ease.
Lilith feared him you thought? 
Feared was the wrong word.
She’s haunted by him. 
Every time she thinks she’s in peace, he reminds her that he has her in her personal hell.
The sharing Soulmate mark was burning on her skin bonding then for eternity.
“Tell me.” Michael licked Lilith’s blood away from her cheek and she shrieked trying to get away from him. But his ice didn’t let her move. 
“We can use her,”
Michael grabbed her chin turning Lilith head to him, “I already tried that Bitch.”
Lilith looked at Michael and shrugged her eyes at him, “But my idea is better.” 
Michael eyes twitched in annoyance, how dare she?
“On extermination day, we can take her away from him.”
______
You knocked onto Charlie’s door hesitant.
You were worried about her.
You know how it is with mommy Issues and when they try to gain something out of you. Out of your weakness and dreams. 
No one can destroy you like a mother can. No one can build you up like a loving mother. And no one can cause destruction like a mother.
You speak out of experience with your mother Sera.
Even though you’ve almost spoken no words with Lilith, she seems kind of like an asshole.
It was all Lilith's fault which caused Charlie and Lucifer being so distant to each other.
Saying always Lucifer was too busy to see his own daughter, which isn’t even true. 
And telling Lucifer that Charlie doesn't want to see her own father.
You didn’t like Lilith at all.
Charlie opened the door and was shocked to see you there. 
“Y/n?” You briefly smiled to her, “Can I get in?” She tilted her head and gave you a concerned look. “Did something happen with dad?” 
You shook your head laughing a bit, “I just want to know if everything’s alright with you? Just a quick check.” Charlie nods her head, not looking you in the eye. 
“I can see when someone’s lying my dear.” Charlie looks up to you, “pfft- No. I am completely fine! really!” She laughed you off, pushing you out of her and Vaggies room. 
“If you say so.” You said, not really believing her. Charlie puts her thumbs up and closed the door right in front of you. 
So that’s how Lucifer felt.
Not a nice feeling.
You can understand Charlie, you’re new. New to this Family, new to her. 
So, you understand when she doesn’t want to share her feelings with you. but it was worth a shot. 
You didn't spend much time with Charlie nor her friends.
You talked sometimes with Angel or with Husk. They seemed nice.
You had once a conversation with Alastor and Lucifer wasn’t really a fan of it. 
Lucifer creeped behind you and gave Alastor a rude comment.
He growled at Alastor and pushed you away from him. 
Since then, you always keep yourself distant from Alastor. 
You walked towards the bar seeing Angel and Husk drinking some cocktails and shots.
You sat beside Angel, telling husk to make you a good drink. 
“Never seen you drink alcohol before. Tough day?” Husk asked grabbing some bottles from the shelves. “Nah, just want to try something new.” 
Angel looked you up and down smiling. “You look different.” His fingers drew circles on the bar table, biting his lips in a sexual matter. 
“Did you and the short king finally get into some action?” He pushed his chest fur up and fluffed it a bit. 
And here we go.
Of course, Angel will notice.
Your cheeks redden, feeling the sudden embarrassed. 
“What? No- where did you get that idea from?!” You started playing with the glass that husk laid in front of you moments ago. 
Angel frowned, “I do sex for a living toots. But except that, everyone can see it even if you’re blind like a fish.” Angel rests his head on one of his many hands and raised his eyebrows at you. 
“You’re not a good liar kiddo.” Husk said and Angel snorted, “Ya see! Even Mr. grump cat can see it.”
Angel smirked at Husk and continued to tease him. They both stopped giving each other shots when they heard your joyful laugh. 
“What?” They both asked in sync.
“You two are like an old married couple.” You continued to laugh out loud.
Meanwhile Husk and Angel were a blushing mess blabbering “No’s” and dismissive comments about how they act. 
“Married couple? No, nah. We two? Never, haha!” Angel blabbered and husk agreed by him. And this went on and on for the rest of day.
Angel, Husk, and you got way closer. 
This was a great day so far. 
But there was an unsettling feeling building up in your guts, telling you to run. 
And you couldn’t figure out why. 
Walking back to your room you saw Alastor on your way back. 
‘Please not him’. 
“Look who we have here!” His smile was unsettling, you wanted to leave before he could try anything to you.
You were all alone and he could use this advantage. But he wouldn't right?
“Oh, hey there Alastor. Sorry we can’t chat any longer, I have stuff to do.” You waved him a goodbye and rushed away from him. 
Please let it work.
“What stuff?” 
Alastor teleported himself in front of you scaring the shit out of you.
You screamed and fell right onto your butt.
A stinging pain was growing in that area. 
“Ow! Wtf Alastor!” You looked up at his well-known wide smile and all he did was smirking even wider.
“You know little Angel; you seem to get comfortable in here. I’m glad you like this beautiful hotel! Do you-“
“Darling! Y/n?!” Lucifer called out for you. Interrupting Alastors chat with you, his ears quickly shifted to the well-known voice which was calling for you. 
Lucifer heard your little scream, and he quickly followed the red string feeling that connected the two of you. 
Alastor hummed and disappeared into his own shadows.
Lucifers eyes shifted around the hallway cursing that this place is too large to find you.
Finally he found you lying on your butt unmoving on the floor.
“Are you okay? What happened.” He helped you up to your feet searching for any damage before looking up to you. 
“Yeah, I guess. Just a weird encounter. Don’t worry about it.” Lucifer sighs but didn’t pry any further.
He trusts you that you’ll tell him when something is wrong. 
When you both were lying in your bed, and he was cuddled all up in your lap. 
All you couldn’t help but think about this unease that thrilled behind your head and in your guts.
It was making you sick, as if you got a rare disease.
You played with his angelic golden hair, hoping it will calm that feeling down, to no success.
It didn't help.
You decided to speak up about this, with Lucifer. Maybe this would help.
“Luci?” He hummed, “I have a bad feeling about this.” He sat up, scared that you mean the relationship you two formed.
Fuck I phrased that wrong. You internally screamed at yourself.
“About what?” 
please, please be something else, please. I thought everything is perfect. Lucifer begged in his head.
You looked onto your shelf where the duck he gifted you was resting. A replica from himself just in a duck form.
It glowing in all their might. You loved this duck; it just was so adorable and remind you of Lucifer so much.
“I don’t know, to be honest. Maybe it is the extermination.” You scratched the back of your head.
Lucifer sighs in relief. Thank God it's just that.
“Don’t worry your head about it Apple pie. Nothing will happen to you.”
Oh, how he will regret saying that. 
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A/n: What do you think will Lilith and Michael do with Y/n?
Annnd one final Question:
💫
@ayanazoldyck @marydragneell @lunaryasha @cherry-cola-100 @lxkeee @latersgaters-steven @fandom-crashlanding @cupidsgift @steadyconnoisseurnacho @crimsonflameproxy @stormz369 @wooleypeaches @fukingsad @starlitvenus @avadakadabra93 @itzabbeym @asmodeussimpnumber1 @sirenetheblogger @k1y0yo @i-have-no-life-charlie @angelicwillows
A/n (again):Thank you for all the lovely comments, likes and repost<3 And FOR THE 300 FOLLOWERS DAYUM. We got new pookies❤️
btw I'm sick so if this chapter (or the next) comes later than normal I apologize.
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434 notes · View notes
springtyme · 10 months
Note
I come to humbly ask if we can please have some Miguel smut? I just really need to be fucked silly by a big strong man 🥺
𝐓𝐨 𝐊𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐈𝐬 𝐓𝐨 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮 ♡
Thank you for the request! Sometimes you just need to be fucked silly by an almost seven foot tall guy, and that’s valid
Miguel O'hara x afab!reader
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word count: 4.1k
warnings: Smut (18+, mdni!) Language. Lingerie. Biting. Thigh riding, vaginal fingering, cunnilingus, unprotected p in v, cream pie. Miguel picks up the reader, possibly a bit of a size kink (reader's height and body shape isn't mentioned, but Miguel is 6'9 and very big and buff) No spoilers for the movie.
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Despite you and Miguel being deeply in love and living together, it’s not much you get to see him.  
You had wanted to surprise Miguel by waiting up for him. And you had tried, you really had, but at last, you had lost the fight against sleep as the hours went by and your eyelids grew heavier and heavier. You had started to snooze off on the couch in your and Miguel’s shared living room a little while ago. 
You know why he does what he does, how he feels like he has a duty, and no matter how much you miss him and how much you worry about him when he’s out there, you’d never ask him to stop. You love him, and you love him even more for everything he does and all the sacrifices he makes to fulfill that sense of duty he has. You really, really love him, but you also miss him. 
You know how much he secretly despises himself for all the nights you have to fall asleep without him, and all the times you wake up to an empty bed too. 
That is why you wanted to surprise him tonight. You wanted to give him a good time, to show you how much you love him. 
To, hopefully, help make him feel a little less guilty about not spending as much time together as you both wish you could and to give him some, much-needed, stress relief. 
You had spent your evening cleaning the apartment. After that you had awarded yourself with an extra long soak in the tub, letting your mind wander as you had scrubbed and lotioned your body. You have actually had this night planned for a few days, and you had even gone out and gotten yourself some new lingerie for the occasion. A beautiful lacey set with matching garters, which you had slipped on after your bath.
It had been a while since you had felt as sexy and confident as you had after looking yourself over in the full-length mirror of your bedroom before you had wrapped your favorite satin robe around yourself and gone to the living room to wait for Miguel to come home. 
And you had waited and waited and waited. 
You are now curled up on the couch, your consciousness floating in a hazy state between wakefulness and sleep. Just as you are about to fully doze off, some kind of sound pierce your mind and you slowly gain a little of your perception back. ‘The door’ you think, it was the click of the front door you heard. The sleepy fog is slowly lifting from your thoughts. And just as you remember what you had planned and what had happened you open your tired eyes to be met with a tall figure towering over you.      
“Mig..?” You croak out, before letting out a little surprised shriek as you’re suddenly being lifted from the couch as Miguel scoops you up in his big, strong arms.  
“Sorry, querida, didn’t mean to wake you.” The familiar baritone of Miguel’s voice is hitting your ears.  You want to protest, he might not have meant to wake you but you hadn’t meant to fall asleep in the first place.
This is not how you had planned for him to find you when he came home. You had meant for him to step into the living room where you had lit candles, and in your dream scenario you would have scattered a few rose petals on the floor leading to the bedroom, but you had settled with the candles. You would have greeted him with a crooked smile while slowly untying the belt that holds your rope in place. But you had fallen asleep and he has now instead walked in on you sprawled out on the couch, and not in a particularly sexy way. Your plan gone completely down the drain. 
“Why don’t we get you to bed, sweetheart?” He says, already on his way toward the bedroom with you in his arms.     
“No, no, I’m not even tired,” you protest. It might sound like a lie after he just found you knocked out on the couch, but you actually mean it. You suddenly feel wide awake despite how late it is. But you guess that Miguel’s probably exhausted by now and that you shouldn’t even try to put the naughty plan you had made for tonight into action.
 You come to this conclusion, even though it saddens you a little, as you reach your bedroom and Miguel finally sits you down in front of your bedroom door. 
“Get in bed, sweetheart, I’ll join you in a bit, just have to put those candles out in the living room,” he says quickly, planting a soft kiss on your forehead before turning around to go back into the living room. 
You sigh as you push open the door to your bedroom, you’re suddenly feeling like an idiot for having thought that this would have been a good idea, to begin with. It is already hours past midnight, he is clearly exhausted and just wants to go to bed.
You untie your robe and walk over to your dresser to pull out a set of soft, unsexy pajamas to change into, but you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, making you stop as you’re just about to change out of your lacey attire
You can’t help but walk over to the mirror to take one last glance at yourself. You had felt so good when you had stood in front of the mirror earlier. You let the now-open robe slide down your shoulders and fall to the floor.
You have to admit, you really made the right choice at the boutique when you picked out this set. It looks amazing, hugging you in all the right places, and somehow manages to look both sexy and classy at the same time. You turn a little in front of the mirror, as you get lost in your own thoughts for a bit, making you not hear when Miguel walks towards the bedroom again. You jump slightly as he opens the door, catching you off guard. 
“What were all those candles even-“ he cuts himself off mid-sentence and stops dead in his tracks as your eyes lock with his in the mirror. 
You see how his eyes scan your near-exposed body, looking you up and down before his eyes again find yours in the mirror. 
“I, uhm, I wanted to surprise you tonight, but I fell asleep…” You shrug a little defeated, but a little glimmer of hope starts to bubble in your chest at the expression on Miguel’s face, hungry and intrigued. 
“You wanted to surprise me..?” He sounds amused, a smile tucking at the corner of his lips. 
“Yeah, it's just that we haven’t seen each other much these last week and I’ve just been missing you and I thought this would be nice, but…” 
“But..?” He arches a brow, a sly smile now plastered on his lips. “I think it’s very nice.”
“Yeah?” You smile back at him, maybe this night hasn’t gone completely out the window after all. 
“Yeah.” He says as he steps over to you. “And I’m sorry that we haven’t seen much of each other. I wish that it could be different, I really do, but-“
“Don’t you dare apologize,” You cut him off. “I know why you have to be out there and I love you for it, Miguel. I just missed you, that’s all.” 
“I miss you too, sweetheart,” he says before putting his arms around you. He just holds you for a little while, letting your bodies do the talking. “Love you so much,” he sighs as he squeezes you a little extra tight before finally letting go of you, only to duck down to crash his lips onto yours.
It starts out sweet, but it doesn’t take long for the kiss to turn heated.
You only break the kiss after your lungs have started to burn and you literally need to stop so that you can catch your breath, but Miguel just takes this as an opportunity to start licking and kissing his way up your neck. Your eyes roll back as he reaches an especially sensitive spot just under your ear, and you tilt your head a little to the side to give him better access. 
Your action is not lost on him and you let out a little whine as he starts to suck down at the soft skin with a bit more force until he detached his lips from your skin with a wet pop, only to gently place your earlobe between his teeth. 
“I’ve missed you so much, sweetheart,” he says softly into your ear before nuzzling his nose against the side of your neck and taking in a deep breath, almost like he is trying to inhale you, to breathe in your essence to always have a part of you with him.
You can’t help but let out a little whine at his words and you squirm a little in your seat on his lap as the warm tingling in your cunt intensifies and turns into a needy throbbing instead, which makes you start to grind your clothed pussy slowly against Miguel’s muscular thigh. 
Miguel’s hands find your hips, gently squeezing into your soft skin as he starts to slowly move you against his strong thigh whose muscle you can feel flexing under you as he starts to slowly bounce it up and down to match the movements of your hips.
“I have missed doing this with you too,” he says into your skin before he starts kissing your neck again. You let out a low moan and bring your hands up to his hair and you bury your fingers into his dark locks, making him let out a low growl sound from deep within his chest which only makes you all the more turned on. 
“Ah, fuck, Miguel, I-I...” You babble as you feel how the lace of your panties are growing damper and damper against him.
“Just tell me what you need, sweetheart,” he encourages you as he gives your hips a reassuring squeeze, leaning his head back to look at you, his beautiful brown eyes locking with your own.  
“Need you, Miguel,” you pant out, “need you to touch me.”
He is quick to act on your request, lifting you from his lap to flip you over and laying you down on your shared bed, your back against the soft mattresses as he is hovering over you, caging you between his arms. He comes crashing down on you, his lips finding yours in a hungry, passionate kiss, removing one hand from the mattress to sneak it between your bodies.
“Mmm,” you happily hum into his lips as you feel his fingers against your warm skin. 
“God, baby,” He groans as he slips his hand down your panties. “You’re fucking soaked, sweetheart. You really meant it when you said you have missed me, huh?” 
“Yeah I–oh, fuck–Miguel,” you softly cry, as he starts to circle your clit teasingly slow with his thumb while his middle and index fingers start to slide between wet your folds, coating them in the wetness of your arousal as he starts to tease around your entrance.
You exclaim a series of pathetic whimpering sounds as he starts to slide into you, first pumping into you with one finger but soon adding another, stretching your pussy out on his thick digits. You grab the sheets, clenching the soft fabric in your fist as Miguel starts to pump his fingers faster and faster into you.
“You are so beautiful,” Miguels tell you, he sounds almost drunk at the sight of you getting fucked by his fingers. “My sweet, beautiful girl,” he continues.  
He is curling his fingers, hitting your g-spot, oh so perfectly, and you feel yourself being pushed closer and closer to the edge. 
“I-I’m so close, Miguel.” 
“I know, baby, I know,” he says, dipping his head down to leave a kiss on your collarbone before bringing his head back up to look at you again. “Come on, baby, I know you can, cum for me sweet thing.”
Your eyes roll back and your mouth falls agape as your walls begin to flutter and squeeze down around Miguel’s girthy fingers as your climax reaches you and washes over you in hot, blissful waves. He keeps pumping into you, letting you ride it out to the fullest. When he finally removes his fingers from you, he slips them between his lips and happily hums as he sucks them clean of your juices. 
“Mmm, you’re so delicious, baby,” he hums, “you think I can have a better taste, sweetheart?” He says as he sits himself down between your legs, hands gently massaging your thighs. 
“I think we can arrange that,” you chuckle, still a little out of breath from your climax. 
“Well, lucky me,” Miguel chuckles as his fingers slip under one of your garters and slowly start to slide it down your thigh and then your calf until you can slip your foot out. You expect him to remove the other garter in a similar way, but he doesn’t, instead, he dips his head down to your thigh, leaving a wet kiss on your warm skin before taking the lace between his teeth and start to slowly slide the garter down your thigh with his mouth. He hooks his fingers into the waistband of your panties and lets them follow the garter’s journey down your legs until he has to let go of the delicate fabric between his teeth so you can be freed from the lingerie, leaving you completely bare under him. 
“God, baby,” he gasps out, looking you up and down with a lovestruck look on his face as you lay spread out for him, your legs wide open for him. “You’re so gorgeous,” he continues, hands coming up to gently squeeze your thighs as he spreads your legs even wider. He leans down over you, leaving a sweet kiss on your lips before getting back into position between your legs.   
“So beautiful,” he sighs, locking eyes with you for a second before lowering his head, licking and kissing his way up your groin before burying his face between your thighs. He slides his tongue through your folds. 
He starts out slowly but is soon turning up the tempo as he gets more and more lost in the taste of you. Miguel has always loved eating you out, you sometimes wonder if he is enjoying it more than you and that says a lot cause you really, really enjoy it.  
He adds a little more pressure, making you wail out with pleasure as he nuzzles his nose against your clit while lapping into you with a tempo and precision that has your legs shaking. You tangle your fingers into his hair, tucking at the roots which makes him moan into you. The vibrations of his moan are sending a chill up your spine and you can’t help but buckle your hips, gently grinding against his face as you feel yourself getting closer and closer to your second orgasm.   
“Fu-uck, Miguel!” You whine out as your body and mind reaches a state of absolute ecstasy. “I-I’m coming–fuuuck–Miguel I’m coming,” you whimper out in between heavy breaths. Your hips are jerking as Miguel’s tongue keeps fucking you through your climax until you’re feeling too sensitive and gently pushes his face away from your cunt.   
Miguel takes in a heavy breath as he finally detaches his mouth from your pussy.  
“You always taste so good, been way too long since I’ve last tasted you, baby,” he smiles at you as you slowly come back down to the earth after having been sent to cloud nine by his skillful mouth. His chin and lips are glistening in the gentle light of the bedside lamp. 
He climbs up over your body, caging you in between his arms once again as he dives down, kissing your lips so sweet and loving that it has your heart clench with love and contentment.
 You take his face between your hands, cupping his cheeks as you kiss him back as you taste yourself on his lips. The before-so-sweet kiss turns heated as you start licking into his mouth so that you can deepen the kiss, tasting yourself on his tongue. It’s now that you realize how very naked you are and how very clothed he still is. You break the kiss to look into the deep hickory brown sea of his eyes.  
“I think you should get out of these clothes, you know?” you whisper as you rub your hands up over the fabric covering his broad chest.
“Yeah?” He grins down at you.
“Yeah,” you confirm, a sly smile on your lips as you look up at the man you love. 
He is quick to follow your orders, lifting himself from the bed to get rid of his clothes, but not before planting another sweet kiss on your lips. He first gets rid of his shirt, peeling the fabric off to reveal his broad shoulders and chest. The sight of him undressing for you has your cunt throbbing once again, you don’t even think you have been fully aware of just how horny and how much you have missed being intimate with Miguel these past weeks. You are so pent up and your hands and your vibrator just haven’t been able to satisfy you like how Miguel can. 
His pants are soon following his shirt on the floor and he is left in only a pair of tight boxer briefs that hugs his thick thighs oh so deliciously and looks like they’re about to be bursting at the seams by the immense and rock-hard bulge that he is sporting, a little wet spot of precum darkening the fabric.     
You can’t help but gawk as he starts to slide the garment down his hips and thighs, his cock springing free, thick and throbbing, slapping heavily up against his stomach. Despite how familiar you are with him and his body, and how many times you have seen him like this before, it seems like the sheer size of him never ceases to amaze you and it makes your need for him reach a whole new level.  
“Fuck, baby, I need you inside of me so bad,” you sigh as you reach out for him, sitting up on your knees as he comes back down on the bed to you.  
“Need to be inside of you too,” he grunts as you wrap your hands around the base of his cock, giving him a little squeezing. He really must have enjoyed himself as he ate you out cause his tip is almost purple at this point and already dripping with precum.
It really is a beautiful sight and you can’t help but feel a little proud that you are the reason for his arousal. He has the most beatiful cock you have ever seen, and if you weren't as desperate to have him in you right now as you are you would have got on all fours and choked on it right this instant. But you lay back down on your back instead, sprawling yourself out for him. 
Most often when you’re having sex you’ll be in a position that has you on top, he is so big that you often have to be the one that controls the pace to avoid you becoming all too sore, and so you can at least somewhat walk the next day. But tonight you want him to be in control, to let him have his way with you. 
“Then come here,” you say, smiling up at him as he does as you ask.   
His dark eyes sparkle as they look down at you with awe. He kisses your lips as he positions himself, the tip of his cock teasing at your entrance. Despite how needy the both of you are, he really takes his time, slowly letting your walls adjust, giving you time to adapt to the size of him as he slowly gives you inch after inch. He is kissing you through the whole thing until he finally bottoms out. You feel so full, the size of him is both slightly painful and absolutely amazing at the same time. 
“God dammit, querida, you feel so good,” he whispers against your lips, “so warm and so fucking tight,” he groans as he gently nibbles at your bottom lip. It has a hot rush of desire run through you and the pain is quickly forgotten, only leaving a feeling of flaming hot love and desire for Miguel in its place. 
“Move,” you sigh into his ear, your voice low and raspy. “Please, Miguel, I-” but you are caught off as he begins to slide out of you only to ram back into you, making you let out a breathy moan. He lifts up your legs, making you cross them around his hips as he pulls out of you again only for him to drill his cock back into you. 
“This is what you wanted, huh?” He asks as he locks eyes with you to see your reaction as he continues his movements. 
“Yes, yes… Just what I wanted,” you nod your head eagerly, already feeling tears of pleasure starting to form in the corner of your eyes. “Been missing this. Fuuuck, been… been missing you.”    
“I’ve missed you too, baby. I hate that I have to leave you so often.” 
He picks up the pace, going at an almost brutal speed now as if to make up for lost time.
“You are doing so good, baby,” he encourages, “taking me so damn well.” 
You are clinging to him for dear life as each of his thrusts pushes you further up the mattress, only for his broad hands, which are firmly planted at your waist, to pull you back down to meet each savage snap of his hips. He kisses along your neck and collarbone, while he murmurs about how beautiful you are, how wonderful and smart you are, and how much he loves you. 
He hits something so perfect inside you and you can feel how the knot in your abdomen tightens and tightens, so close to exploding.
“I’m so… fu-uck, so close.” 
“I know, baby, I know,” he says, digging his fingers a little deeper into your skin, “just let go, sweetheart.”
Your nails dig into the flesh of his back as you feel how your entire body fills with bliss. Your walls are clamping down around him, sucking him into your warmth as your climax overwhelms you and rushes of hot, electric euphoria starts to run through your veins, your vision turning blurry and your bones turning to jelly. He kisses you through it and you feel how his dick twitches inside you, signaling that he is about to cum too.
“Inside, Miguel. Inside, please, need to feel you,” you ramble only to hum with delight as a second later as you feel the hot ropes of cum coating your walls as your desperate cunt squeezes down around him to milk every drop of his release. All the while he keeps thrusting into you, fucking his cum deep into you until you are so full of him that it starts leaking out around his shaft. 
You lean forward to plant a kiss on the bridge of his nose as he finally begins to slow his movements, his eyes, which he had shut tight under the intensity of his overwhelming orgasm, slowly opening to look at you.
He kisses you, still not pulling out as you feel his cock slowly starting to soften inside you.
“How do you feel?” He asks when he finally breaks the kiss. 
“Amazing, but I might not be able to walk tomorrow,” you giggle breathlessly, “but that’s future me’s problem,” you smile at him, pressing a sweet kiss to the corner of his mouth. 
“Good thing I’ll be there to take care of you,” he says before pulling you into his arms and gently pressing you up against his broad chest.
“You will?” 
“Yes, baby, I promise,” he says, squeezing you a little tighter, “I’m sorry that we don’t get to spend as much time together as we should, but I promise you tomorrow I’m yours.”  
“I love you, Miguel, so so much,” you whisper, placing your hand over his and giving it a reassuring squeeze.
“I love you too, baby,” he says as he brings your hand to his mouth and gives it a gentle kiss.
2K notes · View notes
here2bbtstrash · 1 year
Text
sunday (explicit)
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genre: straight-up smut baybey, i did it y'all i wrote a pwp again
pairing: seokjin x reader
summary: you got your boyfriend exactly what he wanted for his birthday.
word count: 5k
contains: explicit sexual content~*~ say it with me: BRAT 👏 TAMER 👏 SEOKJIN 👏 established relationship, reader is uhhh 😬 Extremely bratty lmao, jin takes care of that, BDSM dynamics (mention of safewords and hand signals but neither are used!), reader gets spanked with a belt oop 🤭, fingering/a lil bit of eating it from the back, orgasm denial, big dick jin 😏, praise kink, mouth/throat fucking, a bit of breathplay, begging and apologizing, oh yeah she cries... like.... kind of a lot 🥲 there's a dacryphilia moment in there too (~*~add a little spice~*~), unprotected sex but they're in love it's fine, lots of subspace at the end, use of a vibrator, overstimulation, she comes.... idek how many times, and a smidge of aftercare 🫠 also i promise there's no food play, you'll get why the cake's there at the end ok lmao
A/N: a day late and a dollar short but hey that's my mental health rn 🫡 this was fun!!! always nice to dust off the ol' pwp muscles and frankly i've been itching to write proper BDSM for a bit now. sometimes you just wanna get the shit beat out of you lovingly and that's valid and sexy ya know. anyway feel free to silently skip this one if it's not for you!! and i know i'm gonna get a comment on it so 🙄 i used his korean age on purpose lmao 🙄 yes i can count and yes i know their system is changing~ ANYWAY i sincerely hope you enjoy babes and that you all had a lovely seokjin day 🥺 i loooove y'all !!! 💜
thank you to @haliiimede for beta reading and being my soulmate 🥺
read on AO3!
~*~
The slam of the front door tells you that your plan for today has worked perfectly.
Standing in front of the full length mirror in your bedroom, you adjust a final strap on your bralette, then quickly scramble to pull your clothes back on. You attempt to keep your expression innocent as you slip down the hallway to greet your boyfriend.
Before you can even make it, you hear the unmistakable pop of a wine bottle being uncorked, and you enter the kitchen just in time to see Seokjin leaning up against the counter with a glass of white in hand. He doesn’t look particularly pleased to see you.
“Hi baby,” you say, sweet as can be. “Can I have a glass?”
A muscle works in his jaw as he looks you over, and the expression on his face already has a flame licking in the pit of your stomach.
“That's all you have to say?” he finally answers.
You blink up at him, feigning ignorance. Your heartbeat has started to race behind your ribs, sensing imminent danger— the good kind.
“I haven't heard from you all day today,” he tries again.
You shrug. “I was still sleeping when you left this morning, and then, I don't know. I was doing things. Does it matter?” If Seokjin wasn’t already pissed, you know your last question will get him. You turn away to busy yourself with retrieving a wine glass so he can’t see the smile you’re trying to bite back.
The tone of his voice makes you freeze, glass in hand. “I don't recall saying you could have any.”
Your lower lip juts out automatically, and you do your best to steady your breathing without making it apparent. Even your voice comes out a little shaky. “But we always share.”
The silence in the kitchen feels deafening, punctuated by the soft tap of Seokjin setting his glass on the counter. You mirror him, swallowing hard as he steps in to close the distance between you. It never gets any less exciting to have him tower over you, big and broad-shouldered, tall enough that you have to look up through your lashes to meet his gaze. A dull ache starts to pulse between your legs.
“Do you know what today is?”
You lick your lips and try to speak. “Sunday?”
It’s like you barely get the word out before he’s gripping your jaw with one large hand, and you can feel your heartbeat in your throat. Anticipation buzzes through your body, all the way down to your toes, as he forces your chin up.
“Anything else?” His voice sounds like a warning.
Your mouth pulls into a grin beneath his grasp, one you can’t quite manage to keep innocent. “Oh, Seokjin, is it your birthday? I knew I was forgetting something. Oops.”
“Fucking brat.”
All at once Seokjin locks an arm around your hips, and you let out a shrill squeak as your feet leave the floor entirely when he outright slings you over his shoulder. This is, of course, exactly what you’d hoped for, but you struggle a little in his grip nonetheless. All part of the fun.
You’d left the bedroom door cracked on your way out to greet him, and he takes the opportunity to kick it back open. A shiver runs up your spine at the sight, and then you hit the bed hard enough to knock the breath out of your lungs.
You push up onto your hands as you sit up, slightly dizzy.
“That hurt, Seokjin,” you whine, but you both know you don’t mean it. You have agreed-upon methods of telling him when he’s really hurting you in a way that doesn’t feel good: safewords, even hand signals for when you’re rendered non-verbal. Anything said that isn’t one of those is just you running your mouth on purpose, winding him up. Like now. “You’re being so dramatic.”
“And you’ve got a fucking attitude today,” he snaps. “Is this really how you want to do this? On my fucking birthday?”
You blink up at him with the same sweet smile. “What if I told you I got you a present?”
This seems to surprise him a little, and he pauses, like he doesn’t quite buy it. “A present, huh?”
“Mm-hmm.” You nod as you get to your feet. “Let me unwrap it for you.”
Taking your time with it, you peel off your sweatshirt and leggings to reveal the lingerie you pulled on as he was coming home. It’s a soft pink set with a floral design, thin straps, and romantic lace, and you happen to think it does wonders for your curves.
“What do you think?”
You can see the hungry gleam in Seokjin's eyes even as he scoffs, feigning disinterest. “Oh, this is my present? A disrespectful brat that I have to teach a lesson? I should rip this shit off.”
“Hey, this was expensive!” you snap, and he arches an eyebrow as if to give you a final chance to behave. It just makes you want to push him that much further.
You step closer, allowing a perfect line of sight to your tits that threaten to spill out of their confinements, and you soften your voice when you speak again. “What, you don’t forgive me, Seokjin?”
The corner of his mouth just barely ticks up. “You know the rules. Forgiveness is earned.”
He reaches a hand down to undo the buckle of his belt, and your nipples are suddenly painfully hard against the lace fabric. You can’t remember the last time he used his belt. Fuck, he’s really mad.
“Bend over.”
You huff a sigh as you drape yourself over the edge of the bed, and his hands are already on your ass. He makes a low noise of appreciation as his fingertips dig into your supple skin, pressing firm enough to make you wince. He's not being gentle, and you don’t want him to be.
Your eyes flutter closed in enjoyment of being manhandled like this, and you get so lost in it that it takes you a second to realize Seokjin has asked you a question. By then it’s already too late.
He gives a warning slap to your ass as he repeats himself. “I said, how old am I?”
You peek over your shoulder, wiggling your ass against the flat of his palm, only for him to smack you hard over your left cheek. You bite back a whimper, not wanting to give him the satisfaction.
“I don't know,” you lie, blinking up at him. “You’re so old now, it’s hard to remember.”
In one swift move, he yanks his belt out from around his waist, and you swallow hard as you watch him fold it over in his hands.
“Then why don’t you fucking count for me.”
The belt cracks down over your ass, and you flinch at the first real rush of pain. It takes you a second to regain focus, your brain still buzzing from the hit, and then his words come back to you.
“One.”
“So you are capable of listening, huh?”
Another hit, equally as hard on the other side, and you grit your teeth.
“Two.”
“Aw, where’d that smart mouth go? Not so chatty now?” Seokjin cracks the belt again, and you can barely get the word three out before four is being delivered just as harshly. You squeeze your eyes shut and try to breathe. He's really hitting hard tonight.
“Four,” you gasp, and you hear Seokjin exhale a dark laugh above you.
“Better toughen up, sweetheart. We’ve got a long way to go.” Another hit in the same spot, this one enough to really sting.
“Five.”
“You know, since I'm so old.”
The next blow he delivers is so hard, the word comes out as a cry of pain. “Six!”
You flatten your pelvis down against the sheets, as if in an attempt to hide from the beating, but there’s nowhere to go. The extra pressure makes you feel how hard your clit has started to throb from your punishment. You bury your face in the crook of your elbow, your hips jerking reflexively as you moan through seven, eight, nine.
Every muscle in your body seizes taut as you prepare for ten, trying to encourage yourself to breathe through it, though all you can get out right now are shallow gasps for air. I can take this, you tell yourself, I can take this.
But it doesn’t come. You’re pulled so tight you think you might snap, and you manage to lift your head up from your arms to look back at Seokjin.
“There she is,” he says, and the soft tone of his voice in no way influences how hard he brings the belt down over your ass.
“Ten!” you groan, and the sharp bite of pain over your already raw skin nearly brings tears to your eyes. And he’s not even halfway done.
It’s all you can do now to remember what number you’re on, especially as Seokjin continues to allow torturously long pauses between his hits. He'll wait just long enough that your heartbeat starts to slow, teasing the thin length of the belt up the backs of your thighs, sometimes even with a laugh.
But it’s not relief: the waiting keeps every inch of you on edge, all wound up with anticipation of the next dose of pain, so tense you’re not sure you’re breathing.
You’ve hardly choked out fourteen when you flinch at a brush of contact, the warm touch of skin where you were expecting the crack of leather. Letting your forehead drop against the bed, you pant like you’ve just run a marathon as Seokjin's hand moves over your abused flesh, groping and massaging as he did before. You can’t tell if it’s been minutes or hours since then, but his touch is grounding, calming, even when his fingers sink into your fresh bruises with enough force to make you whimper.
You can feel the way the seam of your panties sticks to your center now, and you can only imagine that they must be entirely soaked through, your slickness already starting to paint the crux of your thighs. With a soft whine of need, you spread your legs a little wider in search of anything but more pain.
“What do you think?” Seokjin's voice is dark when he speaks, thick with lust. The thought of him straining hard against his pants has you practically drooling on the mattress. You want nothing more than that cock stretching you open right now. “Starting to learn your lesson?”
As much as the rational part of you appreciates the check-in, you can’t ignore the new rush of rebellion that surges up at the question. What, does he think you need him to go easy? Does he think you’re not tough enough, that you can’t take everything he’s willing to give you?
You push up to look over your shoulder at him again, your jaw set firm. “No.”
Anger flashes over his face, but he can’t quite hide his smile. “Then I guess I can stop holding back.”
Shit, he was—? You don’t get the opportunity to finish that thought before the loop of his belt is whizzing through the air, and the impact it makes against your ass hits so hard, you momentarily see stars. “Fuck!”
“That's not a fucking number.”
“Fifteen,” you gasp, dropping limp against the bed like a ragdoll, breathless with relief that you didn’t lose track. “Fifteen.”
“The brat can count,” Seokjin remarks, and then he delivers sixteen just as hard and your whole body spasms from the pain as you choke out the number. “If only you knew how old I was, you might have some idea of how much longer I have to beat your ass.”
Your eyes are really starting to well up now, but you force yourself to keep breathing, to focus on his words. It might be coded to fit the scene, but it’s a clear reminder nonetheless: you’re more than halfway. You can do this.
By twenty, the tears have started to spill down your face, but Seokjin knows you well enough to know the scene doesn’t stop unless you call a safeword. He trusts you to know your own limits, and you do. But fuck, he can really test them sometimes. You’re dying for him to touch you, fuck you, do anything but keep fucking beating you. It’s taking everything in you to keep going, your feet kicking helplessly each time he brings the belt down over your tender backside. He hasn’t lightened the weight of his hits up even in the slightest. If anything, they’re only getting worse.
“Twenty-one,” you breathe. You only have ten hits left, and you’ve already gotten through ten hits twice now. You can do this.
“Twenty-two.” You tell yourself not to fight it.
“Twenty-three.” Just give into the pain.
“Twenty-four.” Submit.
Your shoulders heave with sobs as the twenty-fifth strike finally, finally breaks your last resolve. You press your face into the mattress; you’re crying so hard you can scarcely breathe. Even though your body keeps flinching with the reflexive animal reaction to try and get away from the pain, your mind has fully accepted your punishment, all the fight gone out of you.
It’s like someone else is counting for you now, so much so that you don’t even realize what number Seokjin is on until the words leave your mouth.
“Thirty-one.”
You hear the jingle and thud of the belt hitting the floor, and then his gentle hands are encouraging your legs to spread apart. The brush of his fingers over your aching core is sweet, overwhelming relief from the pain still coursing through your system. You’d think it’d be enough to make you cry, if you weren’t already.
“Good girl,” he says softly, and that small praise alone has you floating straight up to the ceiling.
His hands move quickly to pull your panties down and off, and you work to get your breathing back under control, letting your sobs dissolve into sniffling gulps. You whimper when his palms slip under your hips, encouraging you up onto your knees. Your body shivers all over as you try to hold yourself up, to be good, and then you feel Seokjin slip two fingers into your drenched center.
“Oh my god,” you groan as he starts to rub diligently at the ridges of your front wall, his free hand gripping your ass to spread you open. His touch in both places at once, pressing down on fresh swollen bruises and curling up into the sweetest part of you, it’s so good. It reminds you why you willingly give yourself over to this man, the one you love so much, the only one who can make you feel like this. You’re so turned on from the mix of pleasure and pain, you might be close to blacking out.
The bed creaks as he shifts a little, and then he replaces his fingers with his mouth, and you keen. You bury your sounds in the crook of your elbow as his tongue plunges into you, and he snakes a hand between your legs to rub slow circles over your clit. Your mind is reeling; you can barely manage to speak.
“S-Seokjin,” you gasp. “You’re g-gonna, ngh, gonna make me—”
He pulls off just enough to mutter, “You better fucking ask first.”
You swear he ups the intensity on purpose when his mouth returns to your pussy, as if to drag you that much closer to the edge. His thumb is working so perfectly at your clit, you can feel your thighs starting to shake as you writhe back against him. “Can I— can I please come, Seokjin? Pleaseplease, please?”
“No.”
His voice is firm, unbothered, and paired with the painful loss of his touch all at once. A strangled sob of frustration escapes you as you collapse against the bed, exhausted from holding yourself up and from your denied release.
“Not yet,” Seokjin continues. “Not until you’ve learned to be a little more obedient.”
His strong hand closes over your bicep, and he easily flips you over onto your back, causing you to hiss at the graze of your sore flesh against the sheets. Your lower lip trembles, your eyes threatening tears as you stare up at him, but you stay quiet.
“Be a good girl,” Seokjin says, dragging one finger up the column of your throat. You willingly tip your head back for him as a shiver rolls through you. “Let me fuck this smart mouth, then I’ll make you come as many times as you can handle. Okay?”
When you nod softly, he hauls you up to your feet. “Get on your knees.”
You do as he says, sitting back on your heels and watching as he works his pants and boxers down to free his cock. He’s thick and long, flushed dark and dripping hard. Big enough that you go slightly cross-eyed trying to take him in. Your cunt clenches desperately at his size, at how badly you need all of him inside you, bottoming out into you again and again.
But even moreso, you want to be good.
“Mouth open,” Seokjin instructs, and you comply, letting your tongue loll out for him as he tangles a hand in your hair.
He guides himself between your lips, and your eyes roll back at the weight of him on your tongue, the feeling of your jaw stretching open to fit him. He’s so fucking big, it’s uncomfortable, but you do your best to breathe around him and give into it.
Trying to hold still, hands placed sweetly on your thighs because you know he likes it that way, you blink up at Seokjin as he starts to thrust into your mouth. You can taste the salt of his precum as his length drags along your tongue, and you fight back the urge to gag when the tip of his cock nudges into the back wall of your throat. He groans softly as he rubs himself there, his grip on your hair tightening until the pain stings your scalp. Your eyes start to water as you try to keep yourself from choking.
“Fuck,” he hisses when he pulls out, saliva stringing in thick strands from your mouth to the head of his cock. He squeezes at the base of it, eyes glazed dark with lust, and you take in as much air as you can, the cool rush painful where your throat is sore from the stretch of him.
You sit up taller as if to ask for more.
Seokjin’s gaze meets yours as the hand on his cock guides it back toward you, but he doesn’t slip back into your mouth. His eyes are fixated hungrily on your face as he drags the head of his dick down over your bottom lip, teasing it around your mouth and along your cheeks, clearly enjoying that he can do whatever he wants with you.
Your pulse drums loudly in your ears as you sit there, mouth open, and take it. The whole lower half of your face must be slick with spit and precum now, given how easily he glides across your skin, and then you’re hit with the heavy thud of him smacking his cock once, twice, three times against your flat, willing tongue.
“Are you done being a brat now?” he prompts, and you can feel drool spilling down your chin as you nod, his cock still weighing heavy on your outstretched tongue. He slips it in a little further, just past the ring of your lips.
“Gonna be a good girl for me?”
A soft whine escapes around his girth filling your mouth. You nod again, desperate, and then he hits the back of your throat with enough force to make you gag noisily. Your body shudders beneath him, and you try to keep it together.
“Learned your fucking lesson?”
Tears start to sting at the corners of your eyes as he keeps sliding himself into your mouth, the head of his cock dipping down into the tight clutch of your throat, as far as he can go until your nose is flush with his abdomen. You can’t make another sound, your mouth crammed too full, but you do your best to nod even as you lose the ability to keep breathing.
Seokjin’s thumb brushes over the bulge in your throat, and you know what he wants. Tears slip down your cheeks as you squeeze your eyes shut and swallow around him, and he rewards you with an unabashed moan that lights up everything inside you.
“That’s it. You look so good when you cry on my cock,” he rasps, his hand closing over your throat as you swallow again.
You can feel yourself starting to get light headed from lack of oxygen as more tears stream down your face, but the praise spurs you on. You want it too much, it makes you eager to please at any cost, despite the dizzying surge of adrenaline, despite the way your throat is spasming painfully now. You’ll pass out with his cock down your throat, if that’s what it takes.
He pulls out all at once, and the rush of air you heave in is like broken glass against your raw throat. You fall forward, your palms just barely catching you from landing directly onto your face, and you can’t do anything for a moment but breathe in ragged, shaky gasps. Tears are still welling up in your eyes, dripping down onto the carpet beneath you.
Your world tilts as Seokjin easily scoops you up in his arms just to drop you onto the bed, flat on your back. There’s still the dull ache of the bruises he beat into your ass, but it’s like someone’s turned the volume down on it. All your physical sensations seem distant, like they’re happening to someone else, even the dull ache thudding between your legs, a desperate desire to come that was only made worse by being used as your boyfriend’s fucktoy.
Your eyes flutter closed as his hands slip up your body to undo your lacy bralette and peel it off of you, and you don’t fight it.
“Hey, hey. Look at me.” Seokjin's voice pulls you back from the edge, and you fight to open your eyes again. He's hovering over you, fully stripped now, his brow creased slightly with concern. “Stay with me a little bit longer, okay?” His tone is still serious, and you sniff softly as you nod.
He slips a palm encouragingly under your thigh and you do the rest, so out of body that it’s like you weigh nothing at all as you pull your knees up to effectively bend yourself in half for him. He practically growls at the sight of you spread for him so willingly, presenting a cunt swollen with need, painted glossy with arousal.
You watch through heavy-lidded eyes as he kneels up on the bed, and then his thick cock is grinding over you, dragged right up your center. The feeling of finally being touched where you need it most has you exhaling a moan of relief.
“Is this what you want?” Seokjin's breath is hot on your neck and chased by the scrape of his teeth, earning another noise of pleasure from you. Your clit throbs as he rolls the head of his dick over it, up and down, slow teasing.
“Yes,” you manage to gasp. Your voice comes out a little broken from your scraped-up throat. “Yes, please. Please fuck me, please, want it so bad.”
“Which do you want more?”
You’re so gone, choking on whimpers and whines, that his hand closes over your throat to make you focus on the rest of his question. The look on his face is so dark, it sends a shiver down your spine.
“My dick, or my forgiveness?”
Tears spring to your eyes immediately as an overwhelming wave of emotions floods through you. There isn’t a doubt in your mind what your answer is, you don’t even have to pause to consider it. As badly as you want, need him to fuck you, the thought of Seokjin discarding you when he’s finished, still upset, not kissing every inch of your skin, not praising you for being so good… you can’t bear it.
“Your forgiveness,” you sob, doing your best to keep breathing despite his hand around your throat. “Please, please, please forgive me. I'm so sorry. I just wanna be good, wanna be good for you, I don't need anything else.”
You can see his face soften even through the tears that blur your vision. “There she is,” he murmurs, and then he tips his head down to brush his lips over yours. The warm touch of his mouth is all the reward you could ever ask for, and he sucks sweetly on your bottom lip before pulling back.
“Good answer, babygirl.”
Before you can even process what’s happening, he’s fucking the whole of his thick cock into you, and you can only keen as he stretches you wide enough to fit all of him. Your walls are immediately trembling tight to him from how edged close you’ve been all night.
“Thank you,” you moan, your head dropping back against the pillow. A gasp rips through you as he bottoms out, your spine arching when the crown of his cock presses firmly on your cervix. “Thank you, oh fuck.”
“Yeah,” Seokjin purrs, his mouth against your collarbone. You think he might be sucking a mark into your skin, but it’s already getting hard to tell what’s happening. “You always take it so well after I beat the brat out of you. Let go now, baby. You’ve earned it.”
You’re grateful for the permission, because you’re not sure you could stay tethered any longer if you tried. Not when he’s splitting you open, thrusting hard and deep because he knows you can take it, with a cock fat enough to light up every sweet spot in you at once. Your eyes roll back as you start to float, so out of it that you barely even notice a faint buzzing sound until you realize Seokjin is pressing your vibrator down against your swollen, aching clit.
Fuck, when did he even grab it off the nightstand?
You’re vaguely aware of someone moaning, but it doesn’t even feel like you. You’ve given up entirely to it now, a sweet surrender to this all-encompassing pleasure. It’s so good, too good, it slips you out of your mind and body alike, like he’s fucking your brain right out of your skull.
“That’s it, come on my cock,” Seokjin groans, and fuck, you are, you’re coming hard enough to drench his cock with every pulse of your needy cunt. “Such a good girl.”
He doesn't even pull the toy off to give you a moment of recovery, just keeps it nestled between your folds as he pounds into you. Your hips shudder violently as you coast out of your first climax and straight into another one.
It all starts to blur together now, wave after wave of orgasm washing over you until you’re drowning in it. You come and come and come until it feels like you’re melting into the bed, pinned through by this massive cock and the endless mind-numbing buzz on your clit. You can distantly tell that you’ve soaked a wet spot into the sheets beneath you, that your thighs and even the muscles of your ass are shaking from overstimulation.
“S-S-Seokjin.” It takes you three tries to get his name out, and you’re still not really sure if you said it until the toy switches off. The humming sensation is still reverberating through your body even in the absence of it, enough to make you tremble all over as he picks up the pace.
“Gonna fucking— fill you up,” Seokjin grunts, voice thick with effort, and then his cock twitches at the very back of you, buried deep as it can go, pulsing heavy as he paints you with rope after rope of his release. 
You’re still not here, not really, not when he pulls out with a heavy sigh, when the cum starts to drool down your legs, when he drops onto the mattress beside you and pulls you into him. It comes back to you in pieces: you’re shivering all over, breathing hard, your face is wet— fuck, when were you crying?
It takes you several moments to realize Seokjin is murmuring in your ear, that his fingers are carding through your hair, his breath ghosting over your skin. “Just breathe, baby. Did so well, it’s over now. You’re safe.”
As the post-scene comedown settles into your bones, you bury your face into his shoulder, trying to breathe through the myriad of emotions and chemicals flooding your system. He pulls the blanket up over your chest, and the warmth of it and his body help to gently bring you down from the high.
You don’t know how long you lay like that until you finally manage to squeak out a question. “Y-you’re not really mad, right?”
Seokjin laughs gently as he presses a kiss to your hairline. “No, baby. I know you didn’t really forget. The birthday cake in the fridge kinda gave it away.”
The words take a second to hit you, and then a dazed giggle bubbles up in your chest. It’s like you’re floating as you start to laugh, your face still pressed into Seokjin’s skin, and you can feel the rumble of him laughing too. It didn’t even occur to you that he would’ve seen the fucking cake when he grabbed himself a bottle of wine.
“Oh,” is all you can think to say, and you keep giggling as his lips move over the line of your jaw, trailing kisses.
“You’re cute when you’re trying to get punished,” he says softly. “It's part of why I love you. You’re my perfect little brat. And this was the perfect gift, seriously.”
A warm glow blooms in your chest at the praise, and you sigh happily as you curl up against his side. “Can we eat cake in bed?”
Seokjin leans down to brush his mouth over yours, sweetly adoring. “Anything you want.”
3K notes · View notes
roosterforme · 5 months
Text
How You Play the Game Part 8 | Rooster x Reader
Summary: Bradley was miserable without you, and the pain just wasn't lessening even though you left him weeks ago. He needed to find a way to move on, because you didn't want him, and you weren't coming back. But he should have known there was no substitute for the best thing he'd ever had.
Warnings: Swears, broken heart, angst, consensual sex, sex with a condom while intoxicated (18+)
Length: 5000 words
Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x female reader
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Weeks later...
As you flew to Vancouver from Detroit, you thought about that six hour flight to Boston where you hadn't stopped crying for a single minute. You thought about leaving San Diego and how it broke your heart to move on to the next city and the next assignment. At least this time you had a window seat instead of the middle seat in the last row. And this time you weren't continually wiping your tears on Bradley's Padres jersey. 
You had his jersey on again today, but this time you felt calm as you reached into your bag to take out your computer and read over the research you'd outlined about the Vancouver Canucks. Your eyes caught on the blue golf ball, and after a second of hesitation, you reached for that instead. 
You'd taken it everywhere with you. It joined you in every hotel room, on every flight and in every rental car. You had it with you in your tote bag when you were in Boston about a month ago working on the exclusive with the Bruins' coaching staff. You were carrying it when you bumped into Abigail Archer for the first time in person. 
With your article completely forgotten now, you dug your phone out of your pocket. It was in airplane mode, but you took a deep breath and unlocked it. You had to scroll a bit to get to the text thread with Bradley, and then you tapped his name and you almost let the tears rise to the surface. You held them back as you read the series of sporadic messages he'd sent you since early November.
I miss you. 
Did you make it to Boston safely?
Ace, please call me back. I miss you so much. 
I have this whole weekend off, and I can't help but think it would be easy for me to fly to wherever you are. If you would want that. 
I still miss you.
I hope you're doing well.
You hadn't responded to a single one of them. And you never called him back either. But sometimes, when you were in a hotel room in a city that you couldn't even identify without looking at your calendar app, you'd get lonely enough to listen to his voicemail message. See ya, Ace.
It took until you met Bradley Bradshaw for you to really understand just how lonely you were. Going back to your apartment in New York City didn't feel like going home. There was nothing there that made you smile. There were no baseball cards or too small Angels tee shirts. There was no Bradley making sure you were taking a break when you needed one. 
And he was part of the reason why you let yourself start to be convinced that you could have more out of your career. Maybe he was right. Somebody else might have something better to offer than Greg or the New York Times. When you talked to Abigail and started to test the waters, it wasn't as terrifying as you thought it would be. Making some calls to see what else was out there ended up validating one fact for you: Bradley was right, your writing was in high demand.
But you had to complete your contract with Greg before you could do much else. And that included Detroit and Vancouver. But you hoped after this, your work-life balance might improve. If you decided to take this information back to Bradley, you hoped he would listen to you. Maybe he would even see what you wrote about your career change in your Detroit Red Wings article. If he was even still reading your articles. There was a chance he might still miss you now, and maybe he'd understand that you needed to see the bigger picture for yourself first. 
Before you left him alone in his bed, he told you that you knew where to find him. He made you feel like it was still okay to go there.
--------------------------
Bradley walked past his coffee table dressed in his flight suit with his travel mug of coffee in his hand. He paused at the front door and looked back at the mess he still couldn't bring himself to clean up. You left him weeks ago, damn near a month ago, but he just couldn't bring himself to clean up all of the fucking baseball cards. 
He closed his eyes and took a calming breath. He was being ridiculous. He was never ridiculous before he met you, so you must have made him this way. Every time he tried to clean them up and put them back out in his garage, his hands faltered and he left the cards out on the table. It was like some sort of sick reminder that you'd really been here with him. It was a way to convince himself he didn't imagine up the perfect woman in his mind and then have to live through the aftermath of watching her leave. 
He tightened his fingers around his mug and rubbed the heel of his other hand against his eyes. Then he took his phone out. He knew he shouldn't do it since you never answered his other messages before, but he texted you anyway. 
I hope you're doing well.
When he re-read what he'd sent, he started to panic. It sort of sounded like he meant it with an air of finality. The last thing he wanted was for you to think that he didn't want to hear from you, because it was quite the opposite. There were times when he felt so lonely, he'd have done anything for you to write to him or call him back. 
He swore he could still smell you in his house, and right now it felt a little too much like you were there. He wrenched his front door open and slammed it closed behind him, breathing in the crisp December morning air. He had to start making some changes, and he needed to do it this week. You weren't going to respond to him. After four weeks he should accept that as a fact and stop bugging you. 
He'd been skipping Hard Deck nights and leaving the locker room after work without really talking to anyone. Nat knew why he was miserable, but even she seemed surprised it had gone on for this long. 
A few days ago, she said, "You've never behaved like this over a woman before. This has all just been very surprising, and I don't know how to help you."
Bradley had shrugged and laughed sarcastically. "Well, I fell in love with her. First time for everything, right? I'll know better for next time."
And that was the truly fucked up part. He had fallen in love with you over the course of ten days. As he drove to work, he thought about your face and your voice. He knew exactly how many miles he put on his Bronco driving back and forth to see you at the games in Anaheim. He knew exactly how much money he spent on all the tickets. He knew how badly it hurt right now to be without you. And he knew he'd repeat everything all over again if he could see you for five minutes. 
Just like every other day, he had to collect himself before he could head inside to the locker room. There was no getting his time with you back. There was no second chance. There was no communication. He needed to stop. He took off his aviators that you'd liked so much and set them in his cup holder. When he checked the time on his phone, he had a notification that a new article from you had been posted eight minutes ago. It was like this every day. He'd wait to see each morning if you'd written anything, and then after it was posted, he'd read it at least three times. 
Your final World Series article was the worst one. It was released two days after you left. He must have read it a hundred times. He'd even take a screenshot of the short passage he was certain was about him.
This World Series was exciting and dynamic for so many reasons. We witnessed some of the best major league pitching in the last decade, and there were more stolen bases than the past three finals combined. Professionally, I may never witness anything like this again. And I can even tell you that on a personal level, I was profoundly changed for the better by everything I allowed myself to experience and enjoy between San Diego and Anaheim over the course of the series.
Bradley looked at his phone screen now. It had to stop. He desperately wanted to read your article on the Detroit Red Wings, but he needed to make this feeling stop. It was like he was constantly in pain every time he thought about you or even simply read your name on his phone. Your written words were never going to help him move on, so he needed to do something about it right now while he felt like he could. 
He deleted the New York Times app. He thought about deleting your number as well, but he needed to save some of his strength to get through his workday. So he just tucked his phone in his pocket and climbed out of the Bronco.
---------------------------
When Bradley walked into the Hard Deck on Friday night after work, he felt defeated and exhausted. He managed to delete the app you wrote for, but he still couldn't bring himself to delete your phone number. Moving on was a necessity right now. He didn't even know why he bothered to come to the bar, but staying home and looking at baseball cards on his coffee table didn't seem to be helping him. 
"You're here!" Nat called out as soon as he walked inside. The bar was decorated for Christmas. Was it that close to the holidays? He'd completely lost track of the weeks, but at the same time, he knew exactly how many days it had been since he'd seen you. His mind was too aware of that number, and it tacked a new one on each day. 
"Hey," Bradley managed to grunt when his friend came over to him and wrapped him up in a hug. The Christmas tree and the strings of lights blurred, and he had to close his eyes. He was missing the feel of your arms around him and the way you smelled. None of this was Nat's fault or anyone's fault really. Bradley didn't even blame you. He couldn't. You and he were nothing. 
"Let me get you a drink," Nat whispered, and she took him by the hand. He recognized the upbeat Christmas song, and he saw the guys waving from the pool table. But when he turned to face the bar, Shannon was right there with her usual smile and a pint glass in her hand. He didn't know why he wasn't expecting her. The last time he saw her was when he brought you here, and he'd give anything to go back to that night. 
Bradley just shook his head. "Something stronger. Please." Shannon raised one eyebrow at him and set the pint glass down in favor of a whiskey tumbler and a bottle of Johnnie Walker. "Yeah."
"Haven't seen you around in a few weeks," she said, watching the amber liquid slosh neatly up the side of the glass as she poured. "Kinda missed you." She met his eyes as she pushed the glass across the bar. "You look so sad."
He held eye contact with her, trying his best to push the intrusive thoughts away. "Maybe I'll be around more now," he muttered, downing the whole drink in one go and setting the glass down again. 
Shannon was familiar to him. Comfortable. He'd been messing around with women for damn near two decades without any deep feelings. You were really his first foray into something... more. But you were gone. You didn't want to talk to him. You weren't coming back.
She refilled his glass and said, "Take this one a little slower, Bradley." He nodded before downing it just like the first one, and she kind of smirked and shook her head. "You'll pay for this in the morning."
He laughed sardonically. "That's the idea." He left the empty glass on the bar with a little nod indicating that he would be back. He desperately needed to clear his head, but he'd been trying everything for weeks. Taking a walk outside, having a cold shower, going for a drive. Nothing fucking helped. 
He needed to forget the feel of your body and the sound of your voice. So he drank an extravagant amount of Johnnie Walker on Nat's tab, and he started to feel looser. He laughed at her when she asked how many he had so far. 
"Don't worry. I'll pay you back," he rasped with a smile that he knew could charm every woman except for his best friend. 
She just rubbed her hand up and down his arm and said, "I hope you know what you're doing. Let me know when you want me to get you home."
He kissed her cheek. "I'm fine, Nat. Just fine." He finished his tumbler and tried to remember if that was his fifth or his sixth, but it didn't matter. He was warm now, and his lips were a little numb. This was exactly what he needed tonight. After he shot a round of pool and lost, he flipped through the jukebox, but it was all bullshit Christmas music. He wasn't in the mood. He thought about playing the piano, but there was an empty stool at the bar now, so he headed in that direction.
"One more?" Bradley asked Shannon as he sat, and she reached out to touch his cheek.
"You sure you really need one?"
"Yep," he said, swallowing against the lump in his throat as she swam out of focus for a split second. "Just one more. It'll make it easier." 
She turned away from him to get one more clean glass. Then she filled it for him. "Thanks, Shannon," he muttered when she set it down in front of him. He was leaning on his propped up hand, and he knew she was kind of pretty. But he knew you were prettier and funnier and smarter. 
"You can't have what you want," he mumbled to himself after Shannon walked away. He pulled his phone out of his pocket, unlocked it and just looked at the screen. Delete it. He had to. He opened his contacts, and there you were right at the fucking top. 
Ace
You'd always be at the top, wouldn't you? 
Instead of deleting your number, he sent you a text before he could reconsider. 
Ace, I fell in love with you.
Fuck. Fuck! You didn't want him. And there was no way to take that message back now. He closed his eyes and shook his head, because he couldn't tell if he was about to cry or laugh. He was fucking miserable. Truly, he'd never experienced this before, and it hurt like hell. His thumb hovered over your name once again, but he couldn't delete it. He drank the whiskey and tried again. But still nothing. 
He watched Shannon move around behind the bar. She wasn't you. She wasn't what he wanted, but when she announced that it was last call, she made her way over to him. 
"But no more for you," she teased, reaching to take his glass away. But he had her wrist in his hand before he registered what he was doing. She looked a little surprised. The tears were in his eyes again, but maybe it wasn't so obvious to her. He couldn't say the words. He needed her to be the one. When he licked his lips, she leaned a little closer. "I'm done in fifteen. Are you interested? Or are you too drunk?"
He took a deep breath as his eyes closed. He needed to try to move on. The pain needed to stop, or else he didn't know what he would do. Right now he was numb enough. It was now or never. "I'm interested."
Bradley was very aware of what he was doing, it just vaguely seemed like someone else was doing it. He gave his keys to Shannon once they were outside. "Remember where I live?" he asked, walking toward the Bronco. 
"Of course I do," she whispered. 
He found himself with his back against the passenger side door with Shannon's lips on his. It felt fine. Would probably feel better the more he got used to it again. He could do this. He kissed her back and told her to drive, because he knew he shouldn't. 
She drove and parked and took him by the hand, leading him inside his house. As soon as he saw the baseball cards, he wanted to upend his coffee table. He wanted to do this and get it over with and go to sleep for a week. And if he didn't feel better after that, then he didn't know what he was going to do. 
When Shannon tried to turn on his bedroom light, he took her hand in his and guided it away from the switch. "Too bright," he mumbled, and she started to get undressed. He stumbled across the hallway to the bathroom and closed the door. When he looked in the mirror, he'd never seen anything quite so pitiful. He splashed a little water on his face, but it just made his flushed cheeks stand out more. He dug around under the sink for some condoms he thought he still had. When his hand closed around the box, he sat back against the wall and cried. 
He had no idea how long he was in the bathroom. He took his shirt off and used it to wipe his face. You didn't want him. He went back to his bedroom where Shannon was naked on his bed, her skin glowing in the light filtering in from the bathroom where he forgot to flip the switch off.
"Fuck," he grunted, running his fingers through his hair. But she must have taken that as a sign that he was ready to go. He wasn't, but he told himself he was. She touched him, and he let her. She kissed him some more, and he let her do that, too. He reciprocated. He knew to do that much. But it didn't feel like anything. He fucked her, but it just wasn't right. And then he fell asleep with a throbbing head and an aching heart and the wrong woman next to him. 
-----------------------
It had been years since Bradley had a hangover. When he opened his eyes, his left arm was hanging off of his bed, and his face was halfway smashed in his pillow. His mouth was completely dry, and he tried to press his lips together and swallow. He had no idea how he got home or what time it was. 
"Oh, shit," he groaned. He texted you last night. When he was sitting at the bar. He was pretty sure he told you he fell in love with you. He knew you wouldn't write back. You must have blocked his number by now. He was probably texting nobody by this point, but it still hurt like hell that you didn't want him the way he wanted you.
Then he remembered what he did after he texted you, and the bile rose in his throat so quickly. Shannon was right there next to him when he turned his head. He let her sleep over. He never let her sleep over before this. She was in your spot. He needed her gone immediately. 
"Hey," he grunted, his throat like sandpaper. "Shannon. You need to leave." 
She rolled over and glared at him. "Still tired," she whispered, completely naked in his bed. 
"Please," he begged. He was so fucking stupid, it was incredible. Now he was miserable and hungover and angry with himself. "I need you to."
She sighed and stretched, and Bradley made a beeline for the bathroom, stepping on a condom wrapper on the way. At least there was that. Then he emptied the contents of his stomach into the toilet. He sat back against the wall for a few minutes, afraid there might be more he had to throw up. He knew his head was throbbing due more to the fact that he regretted everything he did last night with Shannon than him drinking most of a bottle of whiskey. 
There was tapping on the door. "If you want me to leave, I need to use the bathroom."
"Give me a minute," he groaned, standing up and looking at himself in the mirror. There were dark circles under his eyes and he looked pale. When he brushed his teeth, he felt the tears burning behind his eyes once again. Was this ever going to stop? It had been more than a month. 
Bradley rinsed his mouth and opened the door, barely looking at Shannon as she walked past him, still naked. He went back into his bedroom for a pair of clean underwear and some gym shorts and fought the urge to put all of his bedding in the washing machine. He couldn't even be in here right now, so he left for the kitchen. And he passed the fucking baseball cards again. He would have to throw them away or ask someone to come get them, because he needed them gone as much as he needed Shannon to leave. 
As he turned on his coffee maker, he heard someone knocking on his front door. He already wanted this fucking day to end. He tried not to look at the baseball cards as he passed the table and wrenched his front door open, and then his jaw dropped in surprise.
"Bradley. Hi."
He braced his hand against the door frame as he looked at you standing there on his tiny porch. You were wearing his Padres jersey. He had to be hallucinating. This had to be a dream. You were here.
"Ace."
He watched your face light up at the nickname, and you laughed softly as you examined him like you'd been dying to see him. He gripped the doorframe a little harder as he reached his other hand out to cup your chin and feel your silky skin.
"Holy shit, Baby. What are you doing here?" His heart was pounding, but he felt somehow normal again. Just like he had five weeks ago before you left him in a state of panic. 
"I came to see you." He stroked his thumb along your lip, but you didn't back away. In fact you took a tiny step closer as you added, "I have to be up in Anaheim tomorrow afternoon for some Ducks interviews, but I wanted to see you first. I thought we could talk."
Your eyes were open and earnest, and Bradley felt weak as he looked at his jersey on you. He let his hand drop away from your face, because he had no idea what to say to you right now. He had convinced himself he'd never see you again. "Did you get my texts? Or did you block my number?"
You pressed your lips together and then whispered, "I got your texts. And I've listened to your voicemail a lot. I've missed you." Bradley watched you smile tentatively and give him a little shrug. 
"You missed me," he said in disbelief. "And you got my messages. And you missed me. And you're wearing my jersey."
You looked down at yourself and laughed. "I've been wearing pretty frequently, actually. Turns out I don't have a dress code at my new office, which ironically is in Houston now, but I hardly ever have to be there in person."
When you met his eyes again, he asked. "New office?" He was so confused as he reached out and stroked your cheek with his fingers again just to try to make sure you were still real. 
"Yeah," you said softly, taking another step closer to him. "I have you to thank for that. I have you to thank for a lot of things." You bit your lip before you said, "I left the New York Times. I just finished my last assignment for Greg yesterday. I'm working on a brand new piece now. I actually begged my new employer to let me come back to California for the Anaheim Ducks article even though it's a bit of a fluff piece, because it meant I could come here and tell you that I'm happier now."
"You are?" he asked, unsure what you meant by that. He was having a hard time listening to your voice and looking at your face at the same time, and he wondered how he'd managed ten days in your presence for the World Series. You were just so overwhelmingly perfect. 
"Yes, Bradley. You made me think about my career, and I kind of took the time to change some of my priorities. Because if there's a man as incredible as you who is willing to take a chance on me, then I can take the same kind of chance on myself."
"Ace."
You smiled up at what he was sure was a look of longing on his face. "I'm working for Velocity Report now, and I'm going to have a lot more time off between assignments. Which is important, because you reminded me that I need to take breaks and eat and take care of myself. Even when you're not around."
"I loved doing that for you," he gasped, suddenly dying to kiss you. 
"Yeah, well, you were really good at it," you said as your smile faded a little bit. "But that's why I'm here. To tell you all of this in person. You deserve to hear it in person instead of over the phone, especially since I never responded to you. I wanted to, but I just wasn't ready until now. And I don't know if you read what I said about you in my Detroit Red Wings article... but, I still miss you. And I love you."
His heart was pounding so hard, he thought he was going to pass out. "You love me?" he asked, absolutely needing you to say it again for him as your eyes drifted to where the box of baseball cards was still out on the coffee table. 
Your smile grew as you reached out for his hand and tugged him closer like you were going to kiss him. "Yes, I do. I love-"
Bradley heard a noise behind him, and his heart sank as his eyes went wide. You were looking off to the side, and he heard Shannon's voice. "Oh, sorry." He turned to see her with a puzzled look on her face. He had completely forgotten she was even here. After a few minutes in your presence, you were the only thing that mattered.
"Oh my god," you gasped, wrenching yourself away from Bradley. "Oh, fuck." You looked at him with your hands on your forehead and tears in your eyes. "You know what? Forget I was even here. I'm sorry," you gasped, turning on your heel and walking full speed across his yard to the black car that was parked at his curb. 
It took him a second, but then he was right behind you. "Ace! No, Baby, you don't understand." But it didn't look like you were listening as you dug the keys to your rental car out of your pocket. "Ace! Please!" He ran barefoot out onto the street to try to beat you to the car door, but you were too fast. When he reached for your hand and spun you around to face him, you had tears streaming down your cheeks. 
He was frozen, clinging to your hand as you whispered, "She's the bartender. I should have never come here."
"No," he begged, stepping into your personal space, but you kept dodging him. "It's nothing. I want you here. I need you here."
But you pulled your hand free and reached for the door handle as you sobbed, and it broke Bradley's heart. "I need to go."
He was ready to drop to his knees. "She doesn't mean anything, Ace! Please! I missed you too, Baby! I've been miserable without you, okay? You have no idea." 
You wouldn't even look at him now as you pushed him out of the way so you could climb in the car. He felt all of his dreams slipping through his fingers twice now as you slammed the door closed, started the engine and drove.
"Ace!" he shouted running alongside your door until you hit the accelerator and left him standing in the middle of his street without shoes on. "Ace. I love you," he whispered as you turned left at the end of his block, and then you were out of sight. 
Bradley sank down until he was squatting with his face buried in his palms. "Fuck!" he screamed, the sound only slightly muffled as he jumped up to his feet and made his way back to his house where Shannon was standing on his porch. She looked disgusted as another car pulled up in front of his house. 
"Why are we sleeping together if you're clearly in love with her?" she asked, barely looking at him as she headed toward her Uber. "You should go take care of that."
As Bradley watched her away, he tried to pinpoint exactly how he'd fucked all of this up. He wondered if there was any way to fix it. Once again, he couldn't breathe correctly as that crushing feeling returned to his lungs. This feeling has vanished for those few minutes he was with you again.
"Maybe you don't even deserve her," he told himself as he walked back inside alone, thinking about how for a minute there, you'd loved him back.
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Oh, Bradley. Oh, you sweet thing. Should I add one more part? Thanks to @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls
PART 9
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nyaskitten · 3 months
Text
EDIT: THIS POST IS INACCURATE !!!
I made the assumption Olive was editing the wiki articles, and while that's a very logical conclusion to reach, it was actually someone who shares the same viewpoints as them!!! Anything including the wiki articles and Olive's involvement is wrong and that's my bad!!!
Alright fellas, I guess we did it. We have reached the tipping point. I'm going to dedicate this post to calling out one specific person, @olivescales3, and their very toxic behavior. This post will be a bit messy, and I do apologize in advance, I'm writing this from the perspective of a Ninjago fan who also thinks beyond just the petty fandom stuff, what they're doing is just not cool.
I will clarify, I do not make this post for petty fandom drama, I make this to better spread awareness on some of the bullshit they're doing, so you can look out for and understand that they're bullshitting. Without further ado, I think we should just get into it.
So, what have they done?
Now, I should say while there is no 100000% concrete link between hyenabro and olivescales, I think based on their talking points (as well and the information I've recieved from friends in the Chima fandom, who have a bunch of prior experience with them,) it's safe to make this assumption!
So, what has olivescales DONE in this case? Simple, they've vandalized the Chima wiki on NUMEROUS occasions, even after several different people have revised their revisions, so as to discredit any conenctions between Dragons Rising and Chima.
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(Green is their edits, red is the ones prior to theirs, I found this while going through their contributions section on their Fandom account, HyenaBro119)
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As seen here, they have (under the username HyenaBro119) edited the pages for Chima AND the Forever Rock (I have two similar screenshots of essentially the same thing, one was from the Forever Rock article, the other was from Chima) and claimed Ninjago's lore to be some alternate universe. To further validate it, they write "Ras' visit to," but Ras NEVER claimed to have VISITED these locations, just that he knows them. They also claim the Forever Rock was destroyed, a blatant lie. Only a small section of rock on the Forever Rock was actually destroyed, not the whole thing.
Now, you're gonna ask "but Raine, how can you 100000% say it's them?" and I will cite common sense. While I cannot directly tie Olive to hyena, I CAN say their wording is SO very similar.
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Both Hyena and Olive call DR "a parallel/alternate universe," and again, claim Forever Rock was destroyed, WHICH IS A FULL ON LIE. They're so adamant to protect "the sanctity of Chima's pre-established, set-in-stone lore" that they can't stop to think maybe, JUST MAYBE, sometimes a story can get new lore which can ALSO be canon!
I'd also love to share this HILARIOUS screenshot of one of their many posts, which not only backs up what I'm saying, but it's like damn they really set themself up huh!
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Gee I wonder why you feel alone! Maybe it's because you are! Maybe it's because you're lying and making shit up to prove yourself right! No one is as big of a hater as you!
The also LOVE saying Ninjago cannot do anything with Chima unless they get express permission from the creator of Chima, some guy named John Derevlany, but oh man what's this I see before me?
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CO-CREATOR? Oh but Olive, I thought he was the CREATOR of Chima, not CO-creator... ALSO Lego owns the rights to Chima, and Ninjago, and every other theme, as said by Doc himself! If anything he wasn't really dodging the question, just giving a vague answer, because he doesn't know much about the old contracts!
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From what he said, it's clear that if they wanted to use anything from the other themes, they'd have to consult folks over at LEGO, not John Derevlany or Tommy A.!
Now here's the THING, I GET where they're coming from, it CAN be annoying to have people only care about a thing you like in relation to something else, but when you're going out of your way to argue that none of it can be canon and it's all an alternate universe it's like... god it's so sad and pathetic really.
Their lies and BS don't even end there with the wiki shit, because I have THIS glorious gem.
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A) They bring up that the Ninjago folk do not know who the Phoenixes are which is like, okay??? Why the fuck are they gonna know about how another universe was created??? That's like if someone told me I don't exist in the same universe as my glasses because I have no clue who made them, that is to say, that's stupid as FUCK to say!
B) OH they say something REAAALLL funny ohohohho I am actually dying. Olive says the Phoenix icon "appeared in a Ninjago episode" and "Ninjago tends to reuse assets." Yep, NINJAGO is the one who reused the phoenix symbol, mhm. The symbol that was made in 2011 for NINJAGO, which cameoed in CHIMA in 2014, was actually just an asset reuse by Ninjago. I feel like this actually goes to show how desparate they are to feel right and validated, because this? This a lie! Ninjago made the symbol, and because Tommy A. is co-creator to both, he wanted to slip in a neat Ninjago reference, so he slipped in the Phoenix symbol Nya uses for the Phoenix tribe, not the other way around!
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Another REALLY funny thing they did, aside from the wiki and Phoenix symbol shit, was this hilarious attempt at being right!
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Yes, the compared the WOLF Masks to BATman's cowl, and did a horribly rough comparison illustration that very much does not make sense. If you actually compared them side by side, the only similarities would be they're both angry animal themed mask with pointy ears, which does NOT go very far in the long run. The foreheads they drew aren't even the same fucking shape lol.
OH ANS WE CANNOT FORGET THIS ONE! Their using a post about the Palestinian genocide and boycotting Lego in order to complain about Ninjago.
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They claim Ninjago is produced by Lego, unlike other Lego shows, which is an EXTREMELY bullshit fucking claim. Just like Chima and Nexo Knights, Ninjago is produced by Lego, it's not JUST Ninjago produced by Lego, they are all Canadian-Danish CGI action shows, and they're all known to have Tommy Andreasen involved in the creation of them.
They're using a post about boycotting for the sake of innocent people DYING to complain about a lego ninja show for... killing evil people? It doesn't glorify war, the worst it does in regards to war is like not address how fucked up it can be in regards to the Serpentine War, but that's like it. I think it's so funny they want to single out Ninjago as if it's the only TV series where villains die for trying to conquer/destroy the world.
So, what do I want the takeaway from this post to be? What do I want you to get from it? I don't really know anymore, I just don't want Olive's horrendously toxic behaviors, and straight up lies to stop. If anything I think it's beautiful that Ninjago is making others interested in revisiting Chima again, stop being such a fucking hater dude. They act like Chima is some holy grail of Lego, the greatest thing since bread, but it, just like Ninjago, Dreamzzz, Hidden Side, and Nexo Knights, have Tommy in creative roles.
To act like Chima is somehow greater than is to place it on an unrealistic pedestal as if it's a godsend, when in reality it was co-created by Tommy Fucking Andreasen.
If you read through all of this, I do THOROUGHLY appreciate it, I didn't mean for this post to descend into an angry ramble but ehhh yk how it is. And Olive, if you see this, please, just stop with the bullshit.
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che444 · 7 months
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In order to change them, you must change YOU.
(Long post)
I have manifested many people back into my life: SPs , old friends, family member, people I wanted to be friends with but didn’t have the courage to ask to be friends. Literally anyone. But before I could invite them into my life, I had to go within.
When you’re manifesting someone, you must not only drop your old story but theirs as well. This was hard for me to understand at first because I had very strong negative emotions towards some people for what they did, and I chained them to those cinder blocks of mistakes and viewed them in that light forever.
I am one to hold a grudge, and sometimes they do some bs that makes them deserve it! You’re valid!
However, if you want a person back in your life under better circumstance you must remember several important things:
everything happens through you:
I am not blaming you for their behavior but what you must realize is that they have no choice but to continue to be the way that you ultimately view them. If you think your SP doesn’t want you, they will continue to not want you, because you are consumed in that thought and they only reflect you, you are god and they are your creation.
Process how they made you feel:
You’re never just going to let something go, sometimes people will hurt you, but in order to change the story surrounding them and how you view them you must process your feelings towards them. Write it down, talk to a close friend, whatever works for you.
You may come out of this not wanting them in your life and that is perfectly okay, you may decide you no longer want them and you want someone better and that’s okay! Manifest it baby!
Allow them to evolve and/or Allow yourself to have the version of them you want
If you want to access this new and improved version of them you must allow it to come in or it simply will not.
What I like to do is take myself out of the position of being the person who experienced them, and look at the raw emotions of it all, as God. I am not a religious person, however looking back on when I grew up Christian it definitely offered some interesting points that I believe helped in my journey.
If you are god and all your creation is made in your image, take a second to consider it you have ever done anything that may have caused hurt. Have you ever done anything that hurt someone? Have you ever related to feelings of jealousy or got really angry at someone? Most likely. Have you been forgiven and in turn changed to be better? There are many people who may still view you as the villain in their story but you have forgiven yourself and became anew, they could never put that on you now because of who you have evolved to become, right? Well, give this person a chance to evolve. You are the one writing the story, are you going to continue to make them the big bad wolf or are you going to let them be the knight in shining armor.
Now if this is about you not believing you deserve it, you need to start there. Why do you believe you are not worthy of your creation? Why do you believe you cannot have them or that they don’t want to be in your life? It may be that you don’t believe in love, or that you don’t believe you are worthy. Work on self concept and understand that you are everything and therefore everything is yours. From the trees to the moon, you are everything.
You can get a completely different version of them, you can completely revise an argument away, you could literally make them disappear. You can do anything! It’s your world.
Most importantly: LEAVE THE 3D ALONE
Sweetheart, if you are still maintaining the state that they hate you after saying affirmations for a day then immediately trying to text them, STOP. Start within, and the 3D has no choice but to follow. If you want to make up with them, go within, set the scene of making up with them in your head, say your affirmations, or whatever will give you the feeling that you seek. Once you reach that fulfillment within yourself, they have no choice but to reflect. Let them be who you want them to be, stop holding the old story over both of you, release it, and write a new story. Have faith in your story and have faith in you, and you will receive exactly what you want. Don’t worry about time, worry about you, time isn’t god, you are love.
P.S - don’t let anyone tell you that you shouldn’t manifest a better version of your ex or a person. You are god, why would you let anyone tell YOU what to do? Be fr.
Luv, che 🌺
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inkskinned · 5 months
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they keep the silverware in the same place. you forget about it a little bit when you move out, but during the holidays, it comes back. the way you smooth over your life for them, a gentle reckoning.
for a while, you tried to find yourself by being wild. throwing your body at the emergency exit. finding comfort in the sharpness of a held breath. you used to write wake up on the inside of your wrist. you couldn't calculate the weight of your own sorrow, only that nobody was looking at the anchor of it. you tried maladaptive coping mechanisms like catnip. got caught half-in half-out of them. felt, weirdly, like you should be embarrassed of all of it.
but it does get better. mostly it's just that you become a priority to yourself. it turns out that lending yourself the ragged edge is just cutting open more marrow. for a while, it felt good to see a physical representation of inward agony. but who was that punishing? you learned, slowly (so slowly it was almost invisible sometimes) that you could put love into the wound instead. that the floor was comfortable because it was certain - but it was cold, and unwanting. instead there is a warm bed. you learn to treat yourself like a kid again. gentle-parent yourself into the shower and over breakfast and into laughing without effort. you do wake up.
but then you come home again, and it is like everything is a strange kaleidoscope of childhood moments. here is how you inherited your mother's anxiety. there is the same music playing, and you can't sit down without worrying you forgot to do something. your mother's clipped words and hovering hands - are you sure? are you sure? birdlike, you find yourself seeing unwell and still end up repeating.
here is your father's anger. you are 16 again. there was a moment where you remember thinking - holy shit. i am so much more emotionally mature than you. how you have to talk him down from minor inconveniences, how you parent him like an errant and spoiled toddler who can't be told no, and i mean it. you feel the warp of you. why you can't be in the same room as people having a completely normal conflict. why your skin crawls if there's ever a hint of a fight. why you live with your hands up, placating. and god forbid you get angry. you feel that little spoiled kid rage against the iron will of you. not you, not your hands. you would rather cut your own tongue out of your head, no matter how valid her argument is.
and you're so fucking far from where you were as a kid. you've done so much healing. and there's this little sad part of you that can see the shadow of your past, and your hands wrapped into each other so tightly you made your knuckles white. and how much your parents are just people, and haven't changed much, and still keep the spoons in the drawer to the right.
there is a long dark tunnel here, and it has a name, but you haven't learned how to process that kind of speech yet. close the cabinet. make a note to go get more oat milk. close your eyes.
this place was never home, was it.
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dduane · 4 months
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From the Writing Advice dep't: A complicated ask, a serial answer (part 1)
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Every now and then I get an ask in the box that's complex enough that it has to be taken apart and answered in pieces. Also, sometimes I get queries in that are painful enough (in varying ways) that I elect not to attribute them when answering. This one is both.
I read the ask (and reread it, and rereread it, four or five or six times after it came in, and a bunch more times while I was on my back this week being sick), and gradually came to realize that for it to be properly handled I had no choice but to break it into pieces for best management.
There are three main strands to the issues this ask brings up: motivation, growth as a writer, and coping with or succeeding despite the current state of the publishing industry.
So let's dig in. Here's the first part of the ask:
I know there's no One True Path, but I'm struggling with this, and I'm sure others are too, so I'll just ask it. I want to make a career out of writing, but with shrinking attention spans and so much content to mindlessly consume, how do you keep the motivation to write? My friends get mad at me for getting discouraged when not even they read my writing. They get mad and say, "write for yourself, not for the validation!"
Welp. (sigh)
First of all, I think your friends are absolutely right. But we'll come back to that.
You have to understand that as far as the Search for Motivation goes, I'm probably Spiders DD, the outlier who seriously should not have been counted. I have been motivated to write stuff pretty much nonstop since I was eight, and did my first novel in crayon in a school notebook. (It was one of the thick notebooks. The ones with the black and white marbled covers. Most of you who come of US schools know the kind.)
So I'm really the wrong person to be asking about this, especially since it's now nearly the Year of our (Wood!) Dragon 4722, which would make me nearly, uh, six Years of the Dragon old. And being of such age, and a career midlist genre writer, I have the same source of motivation as the vast majority of my similarly-aged colleagues: the need to write or starve. (There's an Irish saying perfectly descriptive of my situation: "Too old to dig ditches and too scared to rob banks." That's my situation exactly. There's nothing left for me to do but to write.) :)
...Anyway, it's kind of amazing how that kind of motivation'll focus your intention, and help you keep it in place, once you're been working with it for a while.
At the beginning of a career, though, things can look a lot different as you start getting a handle on exactly what it is you like to write and why you like writing it. And having another job to keep you afloat while you find your way is seriously a very good idea if you can manage it.
It sounds very much to me as if you're still in the early "finding your way" stages. This is a place that a lot of writers pass through, so don't be concerned. It's rare for sudden perfect motivation-to-write to crystallize out of nothing. And never forget, the word itself is based on old Latin roots for movement, and provokes the question, "Yeah, okay, but which way?" Movement without intended direction tends to turn into a lot of unfocused flailing, which looks good on Kermit, but not so much on the rest of us.
(inserting a cut here, because honestly, this is gonna go on a bit)
So you need to sit down and start asking questions—and answering them—so you can draw some kind of map. "I want to make a career out of writing"? Fine. What kind of writing? Fiction? Nonfiction? If fiction, what kind? What do you like to read? Why? Is that something you'd like to write? Why? Why not? If there's something else you'd rather be writing—what else? And why?
The more you ask the questions and answer them—"Keep asking the next question," Ted Sturgeon never used to stop saying—and the further along your investigations get, the more likely you are (as you get close to the answers that matter) to start getting the itch to write something, something in particular. This process may take a while, and the itch may take a good while to manifest. Don't be alarmed by that. The old saying is that the fire from Heaven won't descend until you've built the altar for it. And it may take a while piling the rocks up into the right shape. Don't hurry. If this is something you intend to spend a lifetime on, make sure the foundations are sound. The time taken will be worth it.
And BTW, do you intend that kind of length of commitment? If you're not sure, that's fine. But there's no one else to ask at this point who can give you meaningful answers. This is the time to get into it. Work out what "having a career in writing" looks like for you. Then start investigating to see whether your conception has any foundation in reality as a kind of lifestyle you actually have decent odds on achieving. (Again, I'm an outlier here. I'd been writing for pleasure for a long time before I had the good fortune to befriend an actual career writer, examine his habits [and those of other writers in the LA area] at close range, and realize that this line-of-work choice was actually something that could be successfully pulled off by mere mortals.) After investigation, this is a call that only you can make.
But anyway. Once you've started experiencing the kind of motivation that comes of increased certainty about what you want to do and why, you'll find you're way less concerned about sourcing or supporting it externally. It tends to fuel itself. (As once it does descend, the fire from Heaven is tenacious stuff: more Greek than otherwise.)
But also: trying to designate outsourced exterior stimulants for motivation is a bad idea. The reason's simple: one day you'll need them and they won't be there. Conditions will have changed, or the outside-of-you sources into the hands of which you've resigned your motivational agency may not be available for one reason or another, temporarily or permanently... and then where are you? The concept's a nonstarter. If your motivation's acting up, you need to be looking inward, not outward, for ways to kickstart it. This is one of the most personal parts of the writing process. You need to own it.
(And yeah, even career writers' motivation slips sometimes: annoying career things happen, cyclic lows cut in at a bad time, you name it. Most of us work out ways to jar the motivation back into correct operation when it acts up. But for such corrections to work you must first know what it's like to generate or mine yours yourself... and you're still working on that. The methods you find to generate motivation toward doing the Work will also assist you in diagnosing it when it goes south, and putting it right again.)
Also: (sighing) Please let your friends off the hook as regards reading your material, and feedback. Your motivation to write should not be dependent on their feedback, and it's not a good idea to try to make friends feel responsible for keeping you on the creative track. Chief among reasons for this: they may not feel themselves up to the task of giving you the writing support you're apparently asking them for—possibly because they simply don't feel competent to. (This is where we could get into how I had to stop @petermorwood from rewriting his third novel for the third time due to conflicting notes from friends... but let's leave that for later.) At best you're possibly making your friends deeply uncomfortable. At worst, the pressure may damage the friendships.
Tl:dr; our friends may love us dearly, but that doesn't make them competent editors. If you're online, so are many writers' groups who'll welcome a new member who needs advice. Wait till you've got more data and clarity on your motivational issues, and then start shopping around for assistance that seems friendly and trustworthy.
And finally (for the moment), about other people's attention spans:
It'd be good if you can start training yourself away from the habit of worrying about those. For one thing, there's absolutely nothing you can do about them. You might as well worry about the 11-year sunspot cycle. The attention-span issue is just one more distraction from things you should usefully be thinking about. But also: A lot of what we hear about that situation strikes me as fearmongering (as, IIRC, it was supposed to cause the downfall of western civilization around the time I started writing for Scooby-Doo).
If you look around, you'll see that loads of people are willing to spend HUGE amounts of their attention on stuff they love. (I mean, have you been on AO3 lately? And we're just talking about free stuff, there. Lots of other people will do the same for traditionally published work, given the chance and the money.) Your job is to get on with writing, start putting what you're doing out there where people will have a chance to fall in love with it, and then deal with the consequences.
More of this next time. (And please bear with me, as I'm still not up to best operating speed after the last week's illness. I'll get to everything else you sent me, I promise.)
HTH!
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taylormarieee · 1 month
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Co-Stars turned Lovers A Callum Turner love story
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Chapter 1: "Welcome to the Beginning"
Pairing: Callum Turner x Fem!Bestfriend!Actress!Reader
Word Count: 2.k
Warnings: Kissing for like 2 secs, none really
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You and Callum were the best of friends. Every Interview didn't feel the same without the other. You and him first starred together on Fantastic Beasts: Crimes Of Grindelwald and you bonded ever since.
You loved him so much and he loves you just the same. You were always spotted around LA together, always around in photos in Paris or New York to the point rumors went around that you guys were dating.
That wasn't the case at all. You were filming a new show and it took place in Paris and sometimes New York, so you constantly had to fly back and forth and you felt alone at times.
So you always invited Callum to which he happily obliged when he was free. You booked a hotel for however long you stayed in that place and always ordered a room with two beds.
One for you, and one for Callum. He was your favourite person in the whole world as you were his. He enjoyed your company and you felt as though you couldn't live without his company.
You had separation anxiety so you always felt sad when he wasn't around and would drive or fly as many hours as it took just to be with him. He was your Earth and you were his Moon. Without you he felt as though his world wouldn't spin anymore.
Without him you felt as though you had no purpose in life. Your sole purpose was to orbit around him, be around him as much as possible. You couldn't breathe without Callum.
But there were times where you had to just thug it out and do things on your own without him. He had a life too and you didn't want to seem like that annoying friend that seemed as though she didn't have a life and was just constantly around him.
There were times you will distance yourself from him if it meant you didn't seem or look annoying. But Callum of course, the sweet soul that he is never minded you clung to him 24/7. He enjoyed it actually, it made him feel appreciated and loved.
You gave him attention like crazy and he was a mama's boy. He loved feeling your validation and feeling as if he was wanted. He was drawn to you and you were drawn to him and this was the beginning of a love story you both never anticipated. The beginning of a story you both would soon realize was fate and destiny, the universe bringing you two together.
~ Welcome to the Beginning~
"Welcome to the late late show, I'm your host James Corden and I would like to welcome out our lovely guests."
Everyone in the crowd cheers and your giggling with Callum and Austin. You were so excited to be on the Late Late Show with THE James Corden. You loved James Corden.
"Gosh why am I so nervous!" You nervously giggle and look at Callum and Austin. "Maybe it's because you love James?" Austin says with a smirk on his face. It was more of a statement then a question.
"Y/n Y/l/n, Callum Turner, and Austin Butler!" He screams out and that's your cue for all three of you to walk out. You smile and wave at all the lovely people that have come out to see you guys.
Because your the first one out because the boys decided ladies first, Your the first to give James a hug. You laughed as he gave you a big loving hug. You sat down and waited for the boys to sit.
Austin sat closest to James and Callum sat on the opposite side next to you. So in shorter words, you sat in between the two.
"Welcome Welcome!" James says happily. "It's lovely to have you guys on the show." He says.
"Well were happy to be here!" You say with a dashing smile on your face.
"Alrighty let's get started shall we? Y/N! You are a beautiful amazing woman and an even more amazing actress! What was it like to first get into acting? Who were your role models and people you would have liked to tell that they inspired you to act?" He asks.
"oo that is a wonderful question. I found it quite easy and hard at the same time. I was a very dramatic kid, as my mother would say" You say with a chuckle, the audience chuckles as well.
"And it just made things easier. But at times I was very forgetful so it was hard to remember some of my lines, but being a kid actor who's just starting you realize that the adults working with you aren't going to be harsh because your a kid, you know? So that really helped because Adults have a big impact on kids cause your taller, seem more intimidating. But no yea, it was very easy. And my role model growing up I would have to say was either Leonardo Di Caprio or Will Smith. I really liked The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air."
Everyone claps at your answer and the queit down the moment James talks, "That's a wonderful answer. I love that! Now Callum and Austin, I heard you guys went to boot camp training for Masters of the Air. What was that like? Training to just be really hot and outlook people like me?" When James maks that comment you burst out laughing and the whole crowd laughs too.
James really had a way of making jokes and making people laugh. Austin and Callum laugh as well.
"That's what I've been saying James! There both incredibly attractive and I feel like that boot camp didn't give them any training except how to make other men feel bad!" You say through laughs.
James grabs your hand and laughs with you. "Right! At least I have someone to back me up and not call me insecure, Thank you!" He says.
You nod and smile at him before letting Austin and Callum answer. "Ugh well no it was a very fun time of training to outlook other men! No I'm kidding. It was very fun and felt so real, and when you really see the work we did on the big screen it's like, woah I didn't think it would come out that good. Cuz you know behind the scenes were goofing around and having little to know clue what's gonna happen next so yea it was a huge roller coaster." Austin explains.
You nod and give out a hum of approval and look at Callum, "Do you have anything to add on to that?" James asks.
"Nope, I mean I would have said it just like that. It was very fun and having y/n on set? Oh it was never a dull moment when it came to her. We all had a lot of fun." He says. You smile and look back at James.
"Alrighty, let's get to the juicy stuff!" James says smiling. You face fall and you mutter out an "Oh no." And the crowd starts laughing because you forgot that the mic's pick up everything.
"Why oh no y/n." Your face lights up with surprise and you cover your face in embarrassment.
"Because I know exactly what the juicy stuff is! So, to answer your question, no me and Callum are not dating Mr. Corden!" You say with a laugh at the end.
"Wow! Do a lot of Interviewers ask you that question?" He asks.
"yes, everyday!" You and Callum say at the same time. "I promise you were just really good friends who hang out alot because one of us has separation anxiety from their comfort person." Callum says motioning towards you.
You laugh and then hit his arm playfully. "I'm filming between Paris and New York so you'll spot me with Callum alot because sometimes I get lonely so of course I'm gonna bring my best friend!"
"Yea there was a few times she brought me but I guess paparazzi don't see us or they do and just don't ship me and her together." Austin defends.
"Ok ok, so well then that question is moved over, completely erased."
After that the interview, you, Callum and Austin decide to go out to eat. You chose the restaurant, you always did. You never wanted to because you were always indecisive but you eventually chose a place and you guys went to dine.
Sadly, Austin couldn't stay with you guys as his girlfriend called and needed him home for something urgent. Something about her cutting her hand. You both said your goodbyes and wished she was ok before sitting and ordering.
This was the night you realized your true feelings for Callum Turner...
This was the night you would never forget... The night it all happened and was brushed off as a mistake.
"Callum... today was so exhausting. I hate when people ship us, I mean I don't hate James, I'm just tired of getting asked that same question over and over again! Aren't you?" You ramble on about today's earlier events.
"I mean, if i'm being honest... I don't care. Me and you both know were best friends so why bother entertaining it." he says as he leans closer to you from across the table.
"Unless of course...You wanna deny the fact that you would ever date me? Do you not love me or something?" He teases with a smirk on his face.
That. That right there is what started it... What started your feelings and the electricity that shot down your spine.
"N-No that's... that's not what I'm saying or i-implying Callum!" You say nervously. You were never nervous around Callum.
"Mhmm yeah...sure." He says still leaning forward even closer to you know. 'Maybe he's intoxicated' you thought. He was never this straightforward with you or even this flirtatious with you.
You guys were drinking in the car but not heavily. His hand reaches your cheek and you giggle nervously. "C-Callum what are you doing?" You ask nervously.
"I'm feeling your face duh! What else would I possibly be doing..." He says. You notice he's not making eye contact with you but more so your lips. You lick them nervously and you see his eyebrow raise for a second.
He leans in just a little closer whispering a "God your so beautiful" before he kisses you. Your eyes are wide and you melt into it. He quickly breaks away and apologizes before you could even kiss him back.
"Oh my lord, I'm sorry... i don't know what came over me. I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable that-that was a mistake." He says before rubbing his face with his hands.
"I-It's ok Callum. I'm not uncomfortable. Let's just eat ok?" You say with a sweet smile to hide the sadness in your face from him. He sweetly smiles back at you and you both indulge.
That night was a night you've never forgotten but what you were completely oblivious too was that that night was unforgettable to Callum too.
He thought about that night everyday he looked at you... everytime he touched you... everytime he sees lip gloss coat your full lips.
It plagued his mind like a virus corrupting a humans mind. He wanted you badly but he knew he couldn't have you. He couldn't ruin this relationship he had with you, this beautiful friendship, but goddamn were you addicting.
you and Callum were polar opposites yet destined to be together...If only you two could open your eyes and see what is right in front of you.
You and him were made for each other, you just needed to find each other. Like two lost souls searching for a purpose. Like the Earth and the Moon, they look platonic but one can't live without the other. Destined to fall in love either way.
Love, fate, and desire... Something you two need to give into in order to find yourselves.
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Taglist: @dustbunniess @willyoubemycherryy and anyone else that wants to join!
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f1goat · 10 months
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the race winner x lando norris + part 2
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in which you see your ex best friend again after he cut of contact between you two.
not proof read - PART ONE
sunday evening
“It’s insane how much I’ve missed you,” Lando tells you for the millionth time. Since he has ben cleared from the medical center, he has been by your side. He skipped all the media duties, just to be with you. You told him multiple times that you could wait, but he didn’t let you wait. It took him only a few minutes to get you inside of his rental car to get to his hotel together. 
“I’ve missed you too,” you tell Lando again. 
Lando smiles at you. You know he still needs to explain everything, but you are just glad that he’s back at your side. Together you’re sitting in his hotel room. Lando pulls you a bit closer to himself, draping his arm around your shoulders. You enjoy his movement but you know that you still need to talk to him before you can fully close this weird chapter. 
After Lando told you he needed space from you, you were heartbroken. The first days you didn’t come out of bed. You were a complete mess. You tried contacting him for an explanation, but you were quick to find out that Lando blocked you on everything. Max helped you a lot, he kept telling you that there was probably a logical reason behind it. But you didn’t knew. You doubted yourself. It didn’t help that you are also in love with Lando. You have been forever. You even thought that he maybe found out and that that was the reason. But Max made sure you dropped that thought. 
Now while finally sitting next to Lando again, you can’t help yourself and feel a few tears roll over your cheeks. It’s insane. You thought things would always be unsolved. Now you know where it came from. It wasn’t your fault. 
“Come here,” Lando tells you softly. He pulls you even closer to himself. You let your body fall against Lando. You lean on his chest while he swipes away a couple of your tears. It’s no use, new ones are forming quickly. 
“I’m so sorry,” Lando says, “so so so sorry.” You hear his voice crack a bit. When you look up at him, you notice that Lando is crying as well. The sight of him this sad, makes you cry even harder. You can’t stop yourself from sobbing loudly. Tears are streaming down your cheeks. Lando pulls you even closer towards him. He hugs you tightly. You barely hear him, but you swear that he’s still apologizing. “So sorry,” you hear him muttering. 
“Why me?” You doubt if Lando hears you correctly. When you want to repeat your question, Lando is already looking up at you. You conclude that he did hear you, but he needs some time for his answer. You know you’ve asked Lando the same question before, but this time you won’t walk away without an answer. 
Lando sobs a bit as well. He tries to make something clear, but the words are coming out as nothings. You wait for him to relax. Slowly you caress his back. 
“It was Zak,” Lando then tells you. “But I shouldn’t have listened to him. I never listened, but that day.. It was so fucking bad.” 
You wait for Lando to continue. 
“Zak always tells me I’m not focused enough,” Lando explains. He talks a bit slower to help himself with the control over his own voice. “He thought it was you,” Lando continues. “He always talked about you being a distraction, but I didn’t do anything about it.” 
You don’t understand Zak. Why would you be more of a distraction then his other friends? 
“I always told him you were not,” Lando tells you, “but he didn’t really believe me. I guess he has his reasons, since he had some valid points sometimes. But still. He told me to cut ties with you for a while, so I could regain my focus on racing.” 
“Valid points?” You ask surprised.
“Every weekend you weren’t around..” Lando starts doubtingly, he wants to explain himself as good as he can but he isn’t sure if he wants to confess his feelings to you. Yet. He just got you back, what if he will lose you again when he tells you? “Uh, I was in a really bad mood,” he continues, “and I was always busy with planning time with you. Texting you, thinking about when I saw you again or FaceTiming.” 
“Oh.. I didn’t realize that,” you respond, “I never noticed..” 
“It’s not your fault. I did all that,” Lando quickly speaks up. 
“Maybe we can work on it?” You suggest. 
“Yeah, we will see,” Lando shrugs, “I want as much contact with you as possible.” 
“But why did you cut all contact?” You ask further, “What happened that day?”
Lando stays quiet for a bit. He thinks about all the possible answers. Can he tell you everything? He thinks about his own feelings that day. He was busy with the disappointing result, but he was also thinking about you all the time. Zak told him before the race and after the race that he should regain his focus or he would never win a race. The only way to regain his focus according to Zak was cutting of the contact with you. 
“It was bad,” Lando sighs. “Zak visited me before the race. He told me I could never be a race winner if I didn’t regain my focus. According to him it was all you. It wasn’t new that he said things like that, but he kept repeating himself.” Lando takes a deep breath. “Then you came to my drivers room. Zak his words were still in my head and that race was so awful. I just lost my ability to think straight. I could only think about winning a race someday.” 
He takes another short break again. 
“If I think back at it, I don’t even know what I told you anymore and how I said it. I know this isn’t a solid reason, I shouldn’t have taken Zak his words this serious, but I was so hurt after the race. I didn’t think straight.”
“Relax Lan,” you tell him, “I forgive you.” 
You don’t know when you made the decision to forgive Lando this fast, but you don’t feel any regret when you tell him those words. Lando is quick to look up at you, focusing his gaze on you. You feel the well known fluttering in your stomach when he looks at you like that. Fuck. Maybe you should talk to him about that as well? 
“Are you serious?” Lando asks you. 
You nod. You open up your arms again to hug him. 
“As if I can life without you any longer,” you tell him. It’s a bit jokingly, but you’re also honest. Last months were a mess, you can’t function properly without Lando. 
“Let’s go to bed,” Lando tells you after a while.
“To bed?” You ask him surprised, “My bed is in a different hotel.”
“Aren’t you staying?” Lando asks, “We always sleep together at race weekends.” 
You smile, “Let’s go to bed then.”
thursday - silverstone 
“So you weren’t kidding,” Zak remarks, “She’s back.” 
“And she stays,” Lando comments harshly.
“I can take her paddock pass away,” Zak goes on. 
“I can stop racing for McLaren,” Lando responds without even thinking about it.
“You can’t, you have a contract till 2025,” Zak throws back. 
“Say one more bad thing about her and you’ll find out how quick I can leave.”
“As if you would. That could mean the end of your career.”
“Zak, I swear to god don’t push me. She’s here. She will be here every race that she wants to be here and you won’t do shit about that.”
After saying those words Lando walks away from his team boss. He is quick to find you in the paddock. Before he shows you that he’s here, he takes a bit of time to look at you. It’s unfair how beautiful you look. He can’t help himself. Every time he sees you, he’s reminded of the fact he still needs to tell you about his feelings. Maybe he dares this weekend. 
“Hey baby,” he greets you while sliding an arm around your shoulders. Together you walk in the paddock. Lando is on his way to the media pannel, after missing it last week, and he will take you with him gladly. 
Everything between Lando and you is back at how it was. Sometimes when you think about it, it already feels like you’re in a relationship with each other. You share beds. He’s always giving you cute pet names, like baby or babygirl. The two of you spend all your free time together. it’s not your end goal, but you’re glad with everything you already have. 
Together the two of you walk towards the media pannel. You always enjoy watching the interviews. 
+++
“So Lando, after your crash from last week we didn’t saw you in the media pannel? Did you have to stay the night after crashing?” 
You already expected a lot of questions for Lando since he missed them last week. You’re curious about his reasons. What will he tell them? 
“No, I was cleared pretty quick,” Lando tells the interviewer, “but I had some things to do after which were more important.” 
“What things?” 
You can’t say you’re surprised by the question. 
“I just crashed, I had some realizations after. Those things I needed to do, I won’t tell you more about it.” 
“What caused your crash?” 
“I wasn’t focused,” Lando tells honestly, “So I made a mistake.” 
“We saw Y/N in the paddock this morning again after missing her for some months, what happened between you two?” 
You gasp. Since when are reporters asking questions like this? This is way too personal. You notice that Lando doesn’t even flinch because of the rude question. 
“That’s the more important thing I needed to do. I think you can ask Zak more questions about that later. Maybe we should get back to talking about the upcoming race?” Lando responds. 
“One more question for you Lando,” the same reporter speaks up, “Are you dating with Y/N? Do we have a new wag?” 
“I don’t think that’s a question about racing,” Lando jokes, “but we’re still really close, just like before.” 
You notice the way Lando doesn’t answer the question. Just like he did before. He never says that he is single or taken. He always says that he’s close with you, nothing more or less. 
saturday - silverstone
“Oh my god Lan!” You can’t help yourself and scream those words out. “That was amazing!” 
Lando pulls you close to himself. He hugs you tightly. He has never gotten quicker out of his car to run towards you. He’s more then happy with himself. Tomorrow he can start from the front row. He almost got the pole position as well. That would have been amazing as well, but still p2 is already amazing. 
Lando almost kisses you. When he looks in your eyes and sees the proud look you’re carrying he can barely stop himself from kissing you. Fuck. This is getting out of hand. He needs to tell you soon. He hides his face in your neck. 
“You did so well,” you continue, “fucking second place. That’s amazing.” 
Lando smiles at your words. He missed this. He missed you. The best part of getting out of the car is always having you there for him. If the race went bad, you always try to comfort him and if it went well you’re here to celebrate with him. 
“I’m so proud of you.”
+++
“Congratulations Lando!” The presentator greets him enthusiastic, “That’s an amazing result. How did you experience it?” 
“The car was flying,” Lando exclaims happily, “Everything went well. I hope we can keep this up tomorrow and finish somewhere on the podium.” 
“So you found back your focus after last week?”
“Yeah,” Lando confesses with a small smile, “I’m fully focused on getting the best results.” 
“What changed with last week? Are it the upgrades on the car?”
“Of course we did some major upgrades which really pays off,” Lando says, “but it’s also my own mentality.”
“And what upgrades did that get?” 
“My good luck charm got back.” 
sunday - silverstone
“So when are you telling her?” 
“Telling her what?”
“Don’t act stupid Lando,” Max says, “We both know I’m asking you when you’re going to confess your feelings.” 
Lando sighs. “I don’t know,” he says, “I don’t want to cause other drama between us. I just got her back.”
“I don’t think it will end that badly,” Max reacts, “Just tell her mate, I think you’ll be relieved by the end of it.” 
+++
The race is getting close to ending. Your heart is beating faster then ever before in your chest. Lando is trying to hold back Lewis Hamilton. Lando his tires are worser. You can only hope for the best. Every move they make you’re gasping. You’re watching from the McLaren garage, you keep on hoping that you will move to the podium in a few laps. You can’t wait to see Lando on the podium again. 
“I think we need to talk.”
You almost jump up when you hear those words. You don’t have to look up to know who’s talking to you, but you still do. Of course it’s Zak himself. 
“I think so too.”
You decide to keep yourself together. You don’t have to scream at Zak for everything he ruined. You just need to stay calm. 
“You’re a distraction for him,” Zak tells you. 
You watch how Lewis almost passes Lando. It’s a close one. Lando barely stays in front of him. 
“I don’t want you holding him back. I can’t imagine that you’ll want that yourself? Lando is world champion material, but he can’t have distractions around him. He needs to focus on racing,” Zak continues. 
You don’t look away from the screen. Lewis is making himself ready to try again. Fuck. You’re praying for Lando to stay in front of him. 
“So, what do we need to do to make sure you won’t distract him anymore?” Zak asks you.
“Are you asking me how much money you need to give me for leaving Lando alone?” You ask back. You don’t know if you understood, but according to you it seemed like that was what the man asked you. 
“Yes. Or do you want anything else?” 
“I want you to fuck off.” 
“Oh come on, everyone can be bought.”
You let out an annoyed sigh. Who does this man think he is? 
“Listen Zak, I’m not leaving. This trick isn’t working. I’m here for Lando and when he will chose a team that will build him an actual car from day one, I’ll be there for him. If he choses to keep driving for you for the rest of his life, I’ll be here too. I love him.”
“You distract him.”
“Please stop whining in my ear,” Lando’s radio message is coming in quite loudly. “Can’t you get y/n in here?”
“You want y/n?” His engineer asks. 
“Yeah. I need to focus. Let her talk to me.” 
You laugh right in front of Zak his face while walking towards to board radio. “Such a distraction,” you tell Zak, “but who does he need to focus? Oh me, the distraction.” 
“Y/n,” Lando his voice is even harder now you’re wearing the headphones. 
“Hi Lan,” you react, “What do you want me to say?” 
“I don’t care. Please just talk to me.” 
“I think you can hold him off,” you tell Lando. 
“You think I can hold off a seven time world champion with these tires? Did you notice he’s on softs?” Lando asks you sarcastic. 
“Yeah, that’s what I said. Didn’t I?”
You hear Lando laugh in your ear. 
“Come on Lan, just keep fighting. You’re doing great! He can’t push all the way to the finish like this. Just focus.” 
“You think I can do this?”
“I know you can.”
You fall silent for a bit while watching Lando block Lewis again. You don’t want to distract him, but you don’t know what to do. What does he want? Do you need to keep talking? 
“Keep talking,” Lando begs you. 
“Okay,” you say softly. “I can gossip for a bit. You know this girl from my work, yeah? She and that terrible boyfriend finally broke up!” 
You keep on talking about silly things that happened to you and your surroundings for a bit. Lando keeps fighting Lewis and he is still driving in front of him. 
“I think he’s given up Lan, he doesn’t have DRS anymore.”
“Let’s go out for dinner after the race,” Lando says after a while. He’s almost done. Two more laps to go. 
“I think you’ll be busy with celebrating your podium,” you react grinning. 
“We’re going out for dinner.”
“Okay,” you reply this time.
“It’s a date.”
A date? What did just happen?
+++
Lando can’t describe everything he’s feeling at the moment. He notices Max standing close to him while he’s still sitting in the McLaren. He can’t believe it actually happened. He finally got a podium this season. It feels insane. First he got you back and now a podium. Finally everything feels right again. He gets out of his car. His only thoughts are going to you. The way you helped him with talking about nonsense over his radio. He never felt this focused before. He fought off Hamilton. That’s amazing. And it’s even more amazing because of the tire disadvantage he had. He walks - or better say runs - towards his team, but he searches for you. Are you also here? Different team members pat his back, his helmet and everything else. 
Then he spots you. 
Lando walks away from his team members after telling him multiple thanks again. He smiles. Quickly he pulls off his helmet. In the mean time he walks closer to you. 
You. The one who’s wearing a piece of his newest merchandise, even though you find the color hideous. He feels proud. He can’t stop thinking about the way you helped him and the way you’re looking at him right now. It feels amazing. 
Before Lando knows it, he’s standing in front of you. 
“I’m so proud of you!” 
The words mean everything to him. He wants to say thanks, but somehow his words get twisted up inside his brain and on his tongue. 
“I love you.”
Fuck. Did he really just say that? 
Before he can progress what he just did and how he ruined everything again, you’re talking to him. 
“Then kiss me.”
Lando has never put his lips faster on someone then now. He pulls you as close as himself as he can manage. Stupid fences in between. Your soft lips are bringing him in some sort of trance. How can everything feel so right with you? He has kissed people before, but it was never like this. This is something else. Something completely new. This is how it must feel when you kiss someone you actually love. 
When you pull back Lando his trance ends slowly. He’s still processing everything that just happened. Did you actually tell him to kiss you? What if he heard wrong. He’s almost about to apologize, but you’re speaking again. 
“I love you too by the way,” you tell him with a small smile plastered on your face.
Lando lets out a relieved sigh. 
This is the best day ever.
“But I think you need to get your trophy now,” you tell him with the same cute smile. 
Lando doesn’t know what to say. He turns around to go on with everything that comes with a podium. He turns back one more time and looks at you. 
“I love you,” he says again. 
You show him another smile and blow him a kiss. 
Best day ever, he thinks again.
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