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#seokjin x reader
celestial-moonlight · 2 days ago
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Inspired by Tim Burton’s - Corpse Bride
Synopsis:
“His happily ever after had been erased as easily as the words he once put on paper, but now he had you to help him to write it all over again.”
𝑮𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆: Yandere, angst, Historical
𝑷𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈: Yoongi X (f) Reader, Side Pairing: Seokjin X (f) Reader
𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔: Death, Implied death, historical gender roles, forced marriage, unintentional marriage, delusional behaviour, “kidnapping,” brief smut, murder, delusional behaviour, manipulation… Yoongi just loves, love 🥺
𝑾𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝑪𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕: 6.6K
“Can a heart still break once it stops beating?”
The wedding had been set for Christmas Eve.
In just two short days, your life of solitude would end and you would be trapped within a marriage with a man you hardly knew. Kim Seokjin; the son of the most wealthy family in your secluded town, had been on the radar of every eligible bachelorette in town. And you certainly couldn’t blame them. Seokjin was perceived to be a proper gentleman, raised to be full of benevolence. If his charming persona wasn’t already hard enough to not fall for, then his devastatingly handsome face sure was.
It wasn’t that you held hatred or disgust for the man. It was just the premise as to why it had to be him that you could not accept him. Your family had run into a bit of financial trouble after a few failed investments. Your father being a long time friend of Seokjin’s own, had used you as a pawn in order to save your family from poverty.
Now that your own pride had taken a hit, you could barely be in the same room as Seokjin without the overwhelming feelings of pure shame and embarrassment. Nonetheless, you still loved your father dearly, even after his poor decision making. Perhaps he didn’t deserve your forgiveness, but family comes first and you especially couldn’t bare the image of your own mother starving and ending up on the streets begging for nourishment.
So you would do what every good daughter would: give herself up to a stranger and only hope for the best. In this day and age, there was very little that a woman could do outside of getting married.
Now as you stared down at your vows, the neat handwriting illuminated by soft candlelight, you couldn’t wash away the gnawing feeling of hopelessness. These written words were meant to be said from one soulmate to the other, and not meant to be thrown around so carelessly. They were a symbol of an unbreakble bond between two people who put each other first above the world.
But for you, it was for wealth, status, and pure desperation. You felt guilty for Seokjin as well, as a good son he does what his father wishes of him. But without even hearing the words, you knew he didn’t want this just as much as you. The usually bright spirited man became quiet around you, and very few words were often spoken if they did not pertain to the wedding arrangements. In fact, it must have been at least a good week since you had last spoken to your fiancé. But since the wedding rehearsal was tomorrow, there was nowhere to run or avoid each other any longer.
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You stared straight ahead at the mahogany doors before you. You could hear the muttering of the priest pestering the pianist to play the Wedding March in the correct time signature. This wedding had to be perfect as it was set to be the largest event the town has seen in years.
A chilly draft wafts through the chapel where you and Seokjin stood in awkward silence while waiting for your cue to enter.
You feel yourself shiver, wrapping your arms around yourself and attempting to play it off as admiring the architecture of the building. However, it hadn’t gone unnoticed by your husband-to-be.
“Here” he says simply before you felt the weight of his coat on your shoulders. You turn slightly towards him, taking notice of how well his dressshirt fit over his broad shoulders and slender torso. You quickly thank him before the atmosphere turned back to the cold and mildly uncomfortable place that it had been only moments prior.
However, this time it thankfully hadn’t lasted long before you could hear music play, and as rehearsed you felt Seokjin grab your left hand and hold it so that your hands were held parallel to your shoulder. Despite this, he still refused to look at you. It made your heart sink at the revelation that he could very well despise you. Not to mention how dull and loveless your marriage was bound to be at this rate.
Therefore, the familiar tune sounded more like a death march as it drones lowly in your ears. You stared ahead, ignoring the looks from both your and Seokjin’s family. With every step you felt that much heavier, you couldn’t think nor breathe. You weren’t even sure that your feet continued moving until the priest gestured for you to stop at the alter.
Set up behind him were three different candles, only the middle one had been lit. “After I give my speech” his hoarse voice begins. “I will have Seokjin approach the alter, grab, and light his candle while repeating his vows” he gestures to the setup behind him before Seokjin steps up.
Three steps.
You remember. Three steps. No more or less.
You watch as he picks up a tall candle, the clearly overly rehearsed vows falling mechanically out of his lips are just loud enough that the room would be able to hear. Before you know it he gently nudges you forward to do the same when you hadn’t immediately moved forward. With shaky steps you approach the table as well.
“Three child! Only three steps!” You wince as the priest scolds you. You apologize in a small voice, frowning at the disproving scoff from Seokjin’s mother in the background.
“W-with this candle” your voice wavers and you shake your head, realizing you were already wrong.
“With this hand I will lift your sorrows” your eyes trained onto the flame of the candle as you brought your own wick closer to it.
“Your cup will never be empty f-for” you sigh seeing as it fails to catch flame “for I will be your wine” every word stung your heart, it felt as if you lost control of your own mouth- you couldn’t even recognize your own voice. This was all so wrong. Was this really the life you wanted to pursue? As a woman, the worst thing you could do was dare to dream.
And yet here you were.
You had to get out of here, at least somewhere where you would be able to catch your breath and pull yourself together.
Hand shaking, the beeswax candle falls onto the table with a thump that echos through the silent church. You could hear the annoyance in the voices of all the attendees. But you didn’t care.
Swiftly turning, you dashed down the isle before anyone could stop you. Once outside you ran without thought. The further away you were, the more air returned to your lungs.
You had only realized how dark it had gotten once you collapsed onto a stump where it was obvious that a mighty tree once stemmed from. You were panting heavily, teeth chattering, and feet numb. You unconsciously pull Seokjin’s coat on in futile combat against the frosty evening air.
And for a while you merely sat and caught your breath as you gathered your thoughts together. You knew you were bound to apologize when you returned. Possibly on your knees in front of Seokjin’s family for your unprofessional behaviour. But that was the least of your worries. You had made a real fool out of yourself. What did those empty words really mean anyways? Maybe the power they truly held is what had scared you. Or maybe it was because of the look in Seokjin’s eyes as he let the words fall out of his mouth without even a hint of emotion. It was very clear that neither of you wanted this but what could you do? Run away and leave your family to starve? What kind of child would you become?
The jacket you had accidentally stolen suddenly felt constricting, but if you took it off you were bound to freeze out here. After a series of shivers run up your spine, you realize that you really should be getting back. Standing up, an overbearing urge to scream forces its way up your throat and before you knew it your high pitch is startling a murder of crows perched on the high branches of snow-frosted evergreen trees. You could hear their caws to each other and the rapid beating of their wings that syncopated with your heartbeat. For a moment you envied them, wishing you too could just fly away from your turmoils. They looked so free as they circled in the sky, at least they offered you a brief tranquil moment of hope which allowed for you to slowly raise yourself up and out of the snow.
You decided now you would take your time walking back into town. Giving yourself the extra time to think was but all you could really do. The more you thought about your little fit, the more disgusted you became with yourself. Why did it matter anymore? you had to accept that you weren’t fortunate enough to experience true love.
You smirk, amused with how pathetic you were. Those stupid words meant to confess your undying devotion to each other were mere fickle things. It was no wonder how so many marriages ended up failing and instead becoming nothing more then a burden to those within it.
Therefore, You found it appropriate to mock them instead.
“With this hand I will lift your sorrows” you exasperate every word, voice dripping in sarcasm while slipping the ring off from your finger and turning towards a ficticious lover beside you.
“Your cup will never be empty for I will be your wine” you giggled to yourself, likely looking similar to an escaped asylum patient.
“With this candle I will light your way through the darkness” you spun around, eyeing a particular root which faintly resembles the likes of a finger. You shook your head as you approached it.
“With this ring” you whisper into the cold air “I ask you to be mine” and with that you slipped it onto the root, staring blankly at it for a moment before raising your hand to retrieve it. However, a gust of wind momentarily interrupts you. It wasn’t like anything you ever heard before. It sounded as if it was an echo, and somewhere distorted in it was the sound of sobbing. Just before you could move, the ground beneath you begins to shake. You let out a cry of shock before attempting to run away.
But as you turn however, something lands and grips your ankle, before it pulls you back onto the ground. Much to your horror you realized that it was that same root which now clutched your limb with great strength. All the air was trapped in your lungs and all you could do was watch as the mysterious root grew and grew until dare you say... it morphed into something more human-like. Whatever this was continued to grow until you could make out what appeared to be a man staring down at you. You were so captivated that you didn’t even notice you were free to flee once more.
You felt your jaw drop. Whatever he was, surely didn’t seem to be alive. His skin was abnormally pale, almost as if it had a faint blue tint to it. His dull eyes were sunken, dark circles beneath them made him look as if he hadn’t slept in weeks. His body itself was thin and lanky, but he himself was not overly tall. The suit he was clad in looked dated, dusty, and slightly torn, but it fit him perfectly. You could see the remains of a wilted red rose clipped to his pocket.
It must have been a ghost… or perhaps a zombie?
Suddenly it dawns on you.
He was a corpse.
And as he holds out a hand of particularly bony fingers towards you, a shriek finally falls from your lips.
Scrambling to your feet, you slip and slide in your attempts to run from him. You weren’t sure that you were going in the right direction, but at this point you didn’t care. As long as he wasn’t following you, that was all you wanted. Unfortunately every time you turned around, he was there. His legs moved but something about his motion was so mystical. It looked as though he had been floating which only made your heart pound harder.
How was this possible? It couldn’t have been because of the ring could it? He had looked like a groom…Why? Who was he? And what did he want?
With all these questions and more filling your head, you fail to see a block of black ice.
With a painful thud you land on your back, your vision spinning and turning blurry as all the air left your lungs. From the feeling of the stone bricks below you, you recognized that you must have been on the bridge that connected the town to the forest.
Suddenly you feel a presence beside you and you inaudibly gasp once you became face to face with the corpse again. Only this time he looked much less intimidating and instead a little more concerned?
“You should be careful, my dear” his surprisingly soothing voice scolds you “you know there’s snow and ice everywhere, why did you run?”
You didn’t answer him. You couldn’t. All thoughts left your brain when you looked into those dark, lifeless eyes. He chuckles warmly at you, leaning down and picking you up with surprising ease into his thin arms. You were shaking violently, but your limbs wouldn’t listen to you. His equally pale fingers run a line down your cold cheek, his eyes focused on your lips.
“May I finally kiss my bride?”
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Min Yoongi had been a solitary man for most of his adult life. He liked it this way. Growing up, he was an only child and by the time he was twenty, both of his parents had passed due to a plague that rampaged through the town. He being their primary caregiver, and had always wondered how he himself hadn’t contracted it. And because of that, he could never conclude if he had been lucky or not.
Nevertheless, because of his pre-existing love for literature, he became a poet in order to deal with his grief and then there was of course, the factor of making some form of living. His parents leaving him behind only their little cabin and twenty-five dollars to their names. He had sold his poems in town, and luckily many of the (especially single) ladies enjoyed listening to his words and payed him for his time. And although he was by no means ever rolling in silver, he somehow made enough to live comfortably.
One day a certain woman had caught his eye during one of his weekly readings in the town square. Her eyes were what attracted him first, they shone so brightly that the sun must have been envious. The smile she always had on her porcelain face was enough to cure the hardest of days. She was always there, no matter how small or large his crowd was he could never take his eyes off her. So when he finally worked the courage up to court her, it wasn’t of any surprise that she was the daughter of a wealthy merchant. She had always left the biggest kudos in his earning basket. Not that he cared however, he was happy with anyone who was willing to just listen to the words he worked night and day on during sessions that were usually assisted by soft candlelight and an occasional shot or two of whiskey.
His earnings had just merely been a pleasant plus side.
He had fallen for her so quickly. His hands could hardly keep up with the pace of his thoughts that would beg to be put on paper. His poems turned into songs of love and admiration, and while the other women liked to imagine that it was them he was talking about, only she knew the truth.
After a short few months of dating he couldn’t take his hearts desires any longer and asked her to be his wife. He knew he couldn’t offer her much but he hoped his love would be enough.
And it was.
He was ecstatic. Despite her parents hesitancy to accept him. For these two love birds, nothing was going to stop them from giving their all to each other.
Their wedding was set for Christmas Eve, an intimate gathering in the towns square was where they decided it would take place as of course, it was where fate had initially brought them together. However, he soon found that writing his vows had been the hardest task that he had ever taken on. How could he put into words the unexplainable affections that he felt for her?
Somehow he did it, and now with just moments to go until they became one, he rehearsed them once more. A knock on his door made his heart flutter, seeing the love of his life as a vision in white was a sight he waited for so long to see.
But it never quite came.
Instead of his blushing bride, he was met with a ruthless blow to the face which knocked him over instantaneously. Multiple grasps on his arms dragged him from the cabin as someone mutters incoherent slang words that were undeniably directed towards him. There had been a quaint stream by his house which quite often had supplied the perfect background ambiance for his passion.
He was dropped suddenly just beside the flowing water but it wasn’t long before he was gripped by his collar and staring into the depths of a very angry man. “So you’re the penniless bastard that has taken my love from me?” He spits on Yoongis face, looking more like a dog than a human. Yoongi tried to pry himself away, but the mans accomplices would assault his body with kicks or punches every time he did so. This went on until he didn’t have much energy left.
The man clicks his tongue “I’m not going to waste my time with lowlife such as yourself, she. is. mine. She always has been, and with you gone I’ll make sure of it”
With that he is thrown face first into the water and held down until his lungs became full of it. Who would have thought that he’d die by what originally gave him life?
It takes but five minutes until his struggling body falls limp in their grasps, and all that was left was the body of a man whose happy ending was stolen.
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Head and heart still pounding, you feel his cold lips brush against yours. Your blurry vision made the world out to be a swirling palette of colours, as if time itself had sped up. You closed your eyes, hoping for this to be a bad dream and that when you awoke you would be snuggled in your bed at home.
When you opened your eyes again you were. Well, sort of. It seemed to be night time, a few candles were lit and left in the windowsill. The room smelled of mold and pine. And you could hear the faint sound of running water as the sound drifts through the walls. A weight is lifted from you, and you realize that he was still beside you.
“We’re home” he says simply, guiding you towards a small bed in the corner. He sits down and begins to take off his jacket just as you stare at him in fear and disbelief. “W-who are you?” You gulp, pushing yourself into the furthest corner from him.
“W-where are we? Why did you bring me here?” He shushes you softly as he sits beside you.
“I accepted” he gives you a gummy smile “I am your husband of course”
You narrow your eyes. “Accepted what? I haven’t even met you before!” A sudden burst of courage shoots through you as you finally find your voice.
“You said the vows” he shows you his hand and somehow the ring was back on his finger. You patted your pockets, and to no surprise it wasn’t there.
“Where did you get that?”
He chuckles “so full of questions, aren’t you?”
He sighs “I believe your exact words just so happened to be wedding vows...you must’ve hit your head pretty hard my dear” he pouts moving his unnaturally bony fingers back towards you.
You instinctively flinch away.
Wedding vows... the ring... “You- you were the root?”
“Corpse actually” He corrects you.
Oh...
“I believe there has been a misunderstanding... those vows w-weren’t meant for you” you could see his eyes flicker with a hint of sadness before returning back to the lifeless sunken orbs you were used to.
“Regardless” his expression falters again.
“You still placed it on my finger and as the tradition states; we will soon become bound together” it wasn’t hard to tell that you were going to be in trouble if you couldn’t get yourself out of this rather unique situation. It seemed like everything you did, was the wrong choice. At one moment you were about to marry a man who wanted nothing to do with you, and the next you were sat beside the corpse of a groom who wanted far too much.
“I truly apologize for the inconvenience, but you must understand that I’m already betrothed to another”
Somehow his expression grows more grim than before. Well that explained the ill-fitting jacket on your shoulders.
“I see” he trails off, his eyes flickering to the only source of light in the room.
“And do you-“ the word becomes stuck in his throat for a moment. “Do you love him?” He asks.
Your eyes remain low, unable to properly answer him.
If you said yes, perhaps he would leave you alone. And yet…
“I suppose I may grow to” you finally say.
“Grow to?” He reiterates quizzically.
“Do people not marry out of love anymore?”
“Not exactly” you deadpan, growing restless on the thin padding of the cot.
“I’m afraid that I’m just a chip to a game in which my father lost” you sigh, unsure as to why you were revealing such personal information to the stranger.
“Women aren’t exactly born to dream in this age, we do what is expected. Nothing more or less”
“But what if a woman were a dream to another?” The corpse asks “What if that woman became all that mattered to someone else?”
He began to reminisce on his sweet Adeline, completely ignoring the underlying message you tried to pass on.
“Are you assuming that love is enough to keep people together?” You ask bitterly. You’ve seen the way your mother acted towards your father, any speck of love that she might have held towards him at one time was no longer there. And yet she stayed, having no other choice other than being the good submissive she tried to hard to get you to be.
“Love is worthless”
“Is it?” Yoongi’s expression gradually contorts into one of anger. Here, still with a beating heart, you had the opportunity to find love, and you thought of it like the dirt beneath your feet?
“For a long time, love served as my life’s purpose- I thought about it, I wrote about it, I lived it!” He was seething, far too caught up in his untimely death to consider the way you may feel.
“And then I had it taken away!”
With every word his growly voice grew darker. Truth be told, this was the first time he ever truly frightened you. He was towering over you and you could see little black bugs escaping from from his ears and scuttling down his arms.
You felt like vomiting.
Getting up in a flash you pushed him away in order to flee. Outside had looked similar enough, in fact that same bridge was right in front of you. The strange thing was that light didn’t seem to exist anymore. The sky looked like an inky black void, candles were placed along the paths and hung from trees. But the world just felt as if it were paused, with no external movement such as wind. It wasn’t exactly cold nor warm either, perhaps the best way to explain it was slightly humid. At first the only thing you could really hear was the distant sound of church bells, their pitch sounded low and dull, and more like a warning of peril.
And yet you followed the sound, curiosity overtaking from fear. Along the way you had bypassed many people, or perhaps some of the beings could be better classified as things? Many had offered you a warm welcome with actions such as a courteous nod while they twirled a lace parasol, while another finely dressed gentlemen had tipped their hat off to you, uttering a few words of gibberish as he passed you.
Every so often the sound of mischievous laughter zooms past you before the apparitions of two young children giggle at your expression; which must have been complete and utter surprise.
Regardless, they had all held one thing in common; and that was the faint blue glow in which they emitted while gliding through the dark streets, never making any other sound beneath their feet.
You figured that this had to be some form of purgatory.
Your walk ends up bringing you towards the towns plaza... or at least that is what it appeared to be. Directly behind the gazebo in the middle of the square was the same chapel where you had humiliated yourself earlier that day. The doors were open and you could faintly make out words spoken by the figures inside. From where you stood at the doorway you could see three people who looked long passed any sign of life. Their appearances reminded you of the man who brought you to this mysterious place: deathly pale with skeleton-esc figures, and sunken eyes that stared into each other’s as if they could still convey the same feelings they had in life.
You watched wordlessly as the bride and groom slowly leaned into each other before their blue tinted lips met in a kiss to seal their matrimony.
In that moment you could feel a bony arm wrap around your side, which makes you stiffen.
“This could be us very soon... I think we should confirm it in a more formal setting”
Despite his statement and your previous suspicions, the only question that you could come up with was:
“What is this place?”
“The afterlife” he responds much too simply as if he didn’t just casually tell you that you were no longer among the living.
“I’m dead?” You blurt dumbly. Making another gummy smile apprear on his face.
“Not quite, we have to wait for the ceremony to make it official”
You stared at him in disbelief.
Him, taking notice of your confusion explains further.
“When we become wed down here, the wine toast will go a little differently” he points to two silver chalices placed upon a table.
You watch as the couple elegantly raises a toast to each other before taking mouthfuls of a rich dark liquid. Suddenly a ray of light engulfs the couple and in a blink you watch in awe as a string of butterflies suddenly appear out of thin air and gracefully land upon them. Gradually the figures of the bride and groom begin to rise and disappear, leaving behind two lilac coloured butterflies in their wake.
“Because you are not fully deceased, the wine will take your life” he whispers right into your ear. You could feel his cold lips graze the shell which makes you shiver.
“And then we can be together forever”
That made you push him away again.
“Can’t you understand that I am not meant to be yours?”
His eyes soften.
“I-“
“It doesn’t make sense, I-I don’t know even know your name!” you exasperated.
“Min Yoongi” he merely replies, much to your frustration.
“Why are you even here Yoongi?” You ask, hoping for some answers that may help you out of this place.
“You look like a groom...where is your bride?”
He swiftly turns away from you. Raising a hand to cover his eyes in attempt to stop any tears from filling them. It must have been decades by now and yet the pain never quite left.
He waits until he feels his voice will no longer quiver.
“I was murdered on my wedding day” he deadpans, with his body still turned away from you. You observe his expression turn solemn and his arms fall limp and hang by his side. In that moment you figured that you had accidentally struck a deep wound in him.
“I’m sor-“
“It doesn’t matter anymore” he cuts you off quickly as he stomps back towards you.
“I have you now”
Half expecting to be harshly grabbed, imagine your surprise when he gently takes hold of one of your hands instead. You could feel his fingers intertwine with yours.
“Let me show you something”
Merely a few steps away from the chapel he brings you into the gazebo in the middle of the quare. This time there is a comfortable looking chair sat in front of a podium. Yoongi leads you to the chair and sits you down before making his way behind the podium. You could see a couple pieces of paper stacked neatly on top of it. The overly frilly handwriting looked beautifully dated. And you could see a large stain of black ink on the bottom right hand corner of the front page.
Yoongi picks up the papers in his trembling hands. His eyes filling with emotion and admiration as he read over the words that were, at one time, meant for the love of his life. But now he knew that you putting that ring on his finger had been no accident at all, YOU were his second chance at true love. You just didn’t know it yet.
In a desperate effort, he thought that he could attempt to swoon you like he had to the other women so many years ago.
“Y/N” he begins, his voice sounding the most warm and sincere that it ever had.
“Until a man knows love, he doesn’t know life. Until he knows companionship, he only knows loneliness, and until I had you, I didn’t know me. I didn’t know what I needed until I was given you, I felt like the earth without the warmth of the sun, the moon without her stars, and a body without a beating heart-“
You weren’t sure how long you sat there listening, but when he had finished you were left in tears. Your heart and stomach fluttered like the butterflies you had witnessed a while ago. These were the kind of words that you had always wanted someone to be able to say sincerely to you. These were the words of someone so wholeheartedly in love, his voice had practically dripped with such an unbelievably fiery passion.
“So I take you today, now and forever, to not only become my wife; but my reason. The very answer to what the meaning of life is”
He had embodied the term love in those very moments, but your heart began to sink when you realized that those words were not for you.
You were not who he had in mind when he wrote such pure poetry, although in this moment you sure wished you had been.
Sadly, you had to face the facts. You could not allow yourself but especially him to live with the lie that he would truly be happy with anyone who is not his true love.
You looked up at with sad eyes but a reassuring smile. “I cannot replace her Yoongi” you whispered, trying to hide your sadness.
“You deserve to be with her” you got up and walked towards him. “Yoongi, you need to let me go so you can find her... you deserve to be with your inspiration that we both know I won’t be able to replicate” you picked your words as carefully as you could, hoping he could understand.
“Yoongi.. this is proof that I am not meant to be yours” you pointed down to the paper “you can’t tell me that it is me you pictured when you read them”
When you looked up again you saw him staring blankly right into your eyes.
“You wish to return?” He asks softly.
“I think it would be for the best” you nodded.
Yoongi was not delusional. He was not about to let go of his second chance. In such a short amount of time he has found himself a new inspiration. With you by his side he knew he could return to doing what he was best at.
But if you wanted reality then it is what you would get... well the truth anyway. He would make you see why you were meant to stay with him. The fact he let you keep the jacket that belonged to another man so long, has sparked a fire of jealousy in his non-beating heart. He decided that You deserved to see the truth. He knew what was happening on the surface and he would expose the ugly truth to you. He would love you. He would take care of you. All that he had to do now was prove it to you.
“If going back to the surface would make you happy” he sighs in faux defeat.
“I will take you back”
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He took you back up with far less fight then you thought it would take. When you reopened your eyes from the dizzying journey back to the land of the living, you were relieved to see everything just as you remembered it.
“Thank you for understanding Yoongi” you gently took his hands and gave them a reassuring squeeze. “I wish you all the best in finding your true love”
When he didn’t look back at you this time, you had to admit you felt a slight twinge of hurt. Although you did feel guilty for leaving the poor corpse, you knew this was the right choice.
As you waved goodbye, you couldn’t help but feel a little sad, nor could you resist the urge to look back every so often as his ever shrinking figure remained standing motionlessly until it was completely out of your sight.
However, unbeknownst to you he was not planning on leaving alone. Weather you knew it or not he would be there in the shadows, following you wherever you went. He was going to have you see the truth all by yourself, only to show up like a hero in the aftermath once you are bound to be too vulnerable to be left alone.
And then he would take you, and make you his completely. Until then he watched patiently as you re-entered the chapel. Ready to catch you when you inevitably fall.
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Inside the small foyer of a candlelit church you furrow your eyebrows, thinking that your ears must’ve mistaken you.
What you heard was not sounds of worship. No, this was much too erotic.
It was a repetitive sound, accompanied by others that were more or less hushed. They were sounds that could only be made by two people driven by the sin of lust.
You abruptly push open the doors only to be met with the sight of two scarcely clothed people laying in the last pew to your left.
With just a glimpse of his pushed back hair, you recognized one of the sinners to be none other than your fiancé.
“S-seokjin-ahh!” You cringe with the sudden moan of the blonde-haired whore beneath him, who is soon pacified with his lips placed against hers.
Some part of you knife however, that this was bound to become a dirty secret within the marriage that you were forced into. Perhaps you should just accept it now before getting any of your hopes up.
But then you look to the front of the chapel and your blood runs cold.
You rush up to the front where your picture sits framed beside a few lone candles. Some flowers had been placed around it as well. It seemed as though it had been set up to be a mourning ceremony rather then a wedding.
And yet Seokjin had dared to make love to someone else in your absence.
You felt sick. It was like they didn’t even notice that you had came in.
You fall to your knees. Your head clutched in your hands as you suffered a pain that could only be caused by a truly broken heart.
You wished death would just take you now.
Just then the doors are slammed open again with so much force that half of the candles had burnt out with the exposure to such frigid air.
Even the couple startle and end up stopping their actions.
“W-what was that?” The woman sits up, clutching the cheap material of her dress to her upper body.
It doesn’t take long before the couple had abandoned the chapel, much too concerned with the possibility of being caught above anything else.
And then he appears at the entrance, this time holding a chalice full of unidentifiable liquid.
“Are you alright?” Yoongi asks as he swiftly approaches you.
Well, you were perceived to be “dead,” your fiancé obviously held little to no sorrow for you, and to make matters worse; your own family was no where to be seen.
So in other words; things were far from being alright.
But you merely you shake your head.
“No”
Although Yoongi may not have been alive, he sure cared for you as though he was.
He sits down beside where you had collapsed on the steps of the alter, one of his fingers catching a tear falling from your eye.
You grip his hand. “Please Yoongi” you beg
“take me with you”
And indeed he would.
“I would love nothing more” he says and picks you up as he, himself stands.
“But first I need you to do one thing so we can remain together” he brings the cup of dark liquid to you.
“Look into my eyes and repeat after me” he says warmly, holding one of your hands in his own.
“With this hand I will lift your sorrows”
After this, your voice is no longer your own.
“Your cup will never be empty for I will be your wine” his thumb strokes up and down your hand comfortingly.
“With this candle I will light your way in the darkness.”
Something cold is then slipped onto your finger.
“With this ring” you both synchronize.
“I ask you to be mine”
He brings the cup to your lips and pours the liquid into your mouth.
Your death is not as peaceful as he would like. Nothing could prepare him to hold your convulsing form and watch as the life left your eyes. All he could do was hold you as it went down, pressing his lips back against your forehead until you finally lay limp to rest before he took you home.
Sure, he may have warped reality and he could say that it was solely to protect you from an unfulfilling life. In reality however, he was more selfish than he wanted to admit. His happily ever after had been erased like the words he once put on paper, but now he had you to help him to write it all over again.
He looks around the church once more before disappearing with his new wife. The wisp of air left behind had blown out the remainder of candles sat by your framed photo, and thus plunges the chapel into a cold, still darkness.
A/N
Happy Holidays Everyone! 🎄🎅
Maybe let me know what you think? 👉🏻👈🏻
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blank-et-noir · 2 days ago
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The Great Pretender (3)
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chapter: three ( 2k ) genre: fluff | angst | romance | hurt/comfort tags: bts x reader | ot7 x reader | abo au | poly warnings: sexual harassment, overthinking? summary: Lately, the mask you’ve worn since childhood is slowly getting more suffocating by the day. It doesn’t help that along with this, you’re also trying to find your place in your newfound pack. With their insistent attempt to get closer to you, will you still be able to prevent yourself from slipping? beta: @destructiveasparagus (thank you for the comments they are sooo detailed and everything, it really helped and all. It took me pretty long to finish this and I really tried fixing this chapter with the comments you gave me huhu thank you so much 🥰)
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The office was a little too quiet, a little too dark, and a little too empty. But it doesn’t matter since you don’t notice it anyway with how stuck you still are in the thoughts that you’ve had this morning - or dawn to be precise.
Pacing back and forth in the little space you have just beside your work cubicle, you think of ways to cover up your mistake last night. You still remember how Hoseok and Yoongi’s arms wrapped around you, tightly, from each side. Feeling lonely, you hug yourself.
Despite the sweat running down from your temples, it’s strangely cold, So you run your hands up and down your upper arms, in an attempt to simulate the warmth you felt last night, but it barely makes a difference.
Self-disgust starts creeping in when you realize just how much you crave feeling oh-so-small in the middle of them. Actually, wanting the affection you received that night and feeling so soft. Your nails start to dig deeper on the upper arm, leaving nail marks. Alphas are not supposed to feel that way. You’re not raised to feel that way.
You know that you’re overthinking it, that you were able to escape the nest without anyone noticing. You probably have nothing to worry about. But a part of your brain says that your escape is just temporary - it’s just you delaying things.
So you try to rationalize, in order to stop yourself from spiraling.
Okay. Best case scenario is they haven’t noticed at all. They haven’t noticed when your unconscious self sleepwalked to their nest and slotted herself in the middle of their intimate pack cuddle - more specifically, inserted herself in between the warm hugs of Hobi and Yoongi. They also didn’t notice you fleeing before they even woke up. So it appears as if nothing has happened and you slept all night alone in your own room, just like how you should’ve been.
Worst case scenario - which is, by the way, unlikely than the one prior but, nevertheless, is still a probability to consider - is that someone woke up last night when you sleepwalked to the nest. And they were forced to sleep uncomfortably because you just invaded an intimate space that you were clearly uninvited in. They witnessed how soft you were of an alpha and are annoyed that they have to deal with their needy and clingy ass. They’ll soon realize how you were faking it all along and you’re not the strong and independent alpha that you pretended to be. The alphas would be disappointed, the betas weirded out, and the omegas disgusted. You failed them as an alpha and they’ll want to kick you out of the pack.
Now, weighing both scenarios, one is more likely than the other because had it been the second one then it wouldn’t make sense for Yoongi and Hoseok to willingly cuddle you. If they were dead asleep, it is more natural that they’d hug you close, thinking that your body is just one of their other pack mates and not you.
That makes sense. Okay. Obviously there is no need to panic anymore.
All you have to worry about is how you’ll act when you go home and face them. If you act like everything’s normal and mask the guilt you feel then you’ll be fine. If it gets too hard you can just pretend you have another business trip and spend the night in your unit until the guilt fades away.
Okay, maybe that last option is too severe. But you’d like to believe you’re a decent actress, so you got this in the bag. The last option is just a big “what if.”
With a solution now in mind, you move forward and try to brainstorm for the prevention part of the plan.
You’re too scared to imagine just how much bigger your slip-ups could get. Sure, you’ve had them frequently these days - like how you almost cuddled Lisa openly in public last week or how you accidentally let out a whine in your phone call with Yoongi - but those were just small, minor mistakes that are easy to cover up.
Last night was too risky. This week was supposed to be your heat. Sure, the suppressants were able to stop them from actually happening but the doctor warned you that it could still be triggered by strong scenting of mates or intimate contact with partners. In short, you were in a very sensitive and vulnerable spot right now. You couldn’t afford to have anoth -
Before you can even finish your train of thought, you heard a loud crashing sound in one of the closed offices.
Startled by the loud sound, it takes you a minute before you move to check where the sound came from. And as you walk closer to where you thought you heard the sound, you slowly sink in dread when you realize that you are heading towards your boss’s office.
It should be fine right? You have to check just in case someone was hurt.
Surely, he hasn’t arrived in the office yet - it’s too early. It could just be the janitor slipping on the floor?
Deep inside you knew that you were only holding onto false hope. Your boss was particularly known to arrive even before office hours. The reason - you’re not sure. You can only suspect that that’s the time he actually gets his job done. That would explain how he’s able to spend the rest of the office hours frolicking around and terrorizing his subordinates without falling behind his workload. It’s one of the reasons the higher ups can’t just kick him out. He’s an efficient worker. Although he was never one to work well with others, no one could deny that he actually is able to get things done.
You try to approach the door as quietly as you can. The silence of the office makes the sound of your heartbeat much louder to your ears.
The door creaks a little even as you open it the slowest that you can. And as you catch a brief glimpse of your boss from the small gap you created by the door, you try your best to retreat swiftly. Except it doesn’t work because in your hurry you accidentally slam the door shut.
You were about to bolt when your boss’s voice halts your every movement.
“Whoever is out there, come back in before I call security and fire you. There are surveillance cameras just outside my office, I can easily know your identity by checking them later.”
He’s eerily calm for someone who just caught someone sneaking to his office. Isn’t he afraid it might be an actual robber. How is he so sure it’s an employee? Plus it’s like 5 am in the morning, isn’t he scared that I might be like a ghost or something?
“Quickly, before I lose my patience.” With that threat, all your other thoughts vanish and you enter the room with your head lowered.
“If it isn’t my favorite girl? Y/N, I knew you’d one day fold.”
You momentarily cringe at the endearment before confusion starts to seep in. It must have been evident in your facial expression because before the pregnant silence envelops you any longer, he expounds further.
“You’re starting to regret choosing your pack. You’re here to beg me to take you.”
At his confident statement, you flinch. For the first time, you raise your head and attempt to throw him a look of disgust and distaste only for it to morph into shock.
His eyes were bloodshot red. Hair and suit, a mess. Papers and pens are scattered everywhere. There are some pieces of ceramic and glass on the floor. His table is cleared. Now, that must be the cause of the sound. He threw all of the items on his desk to the floor, including his pristine glass nameplate.
God, did just trash his office? This early? On a Monday? That’s fucked up.
He takes a step closer to you, and oddly he takes a huge sniff.
And if you weren’t peeved enough by the mess he had in his office, that obviously perverted action definitely set you off.
“Fucking hell. Baby, you don’t even have to beg anymore. You offering me to take you on your heat is definitely enough to make up for ditching me over that stupid pack of yours.”
The fuck?!?
Then it hits you. In your rush to leave home, you forgot to take your suppressants and apply some scent mask, just like how your doctor advised you.
You take a step back, clearly heading for the door in the most subtlest of ways. And your boss, still drunk on the scent of you, doesn't seem to notice your obvious attempt to escape - that you don’t want this, that it was not your intention to ask him to help you on your heat. Instead, he creeps even closer, slowly, as if approaching prey - which was ironic at this point since you were the alpha.
He’s not any bigger than usual betas but you were smaller than a normal alpha - if it weren’t for your scent, many could mistake you as an omega because of your physique. Still, size wasn’t the issue- you can beat him in a fight any day - it’s the evident power gap.
The old man had vast connections ranging from different industries. Shitty attitude aside, many actually respect him for his output and works. He’s an asset to the company, one they wouldn’t want to lose. If a harassment case were ever to blossom from this, you know that it’d be you that the company would lay off. You were pretty sure that wasn’t legal but they have their ways. The thing is, you’re just not important to the company as this man is. And if they have to, you’re an expense they’re willing to pay just to make the man stay.
You’re extremely close to the door now. Witnessing your threatened state doesn’t seem to bother or agitate the beta. He just leans close to sniff again just near your neck. You freeze then shudder. Disgusted but unable to move, scared that your sudden movement might trigger him to bite your flesh.
Only after he leans back and shows you a demeaning smirk did you finally push him hard and rush out the door, heading to the nearest comfort room to wash away his claim on you. As you run, you hear him shout from the room.
“I’ll wait for your heat to peak, baby! I’ll take you!”
~~~~~
You felt pretty much numb after the encounter, so you just stayed in your cubicle.
It’s not sexual harassment right? Sure, you felt uncomfortable but he technically didn’t touch you. Maybe you’re just overreacting. Plus even if it is, will anyone believe you? An alpha getting harassed by a beta - is that even possible. It’s probably your fault. You’re an alpha for god’s sake, you could’ve just used your physical strength or alpha voice. Why can’t you defend yourself?
One by one, other employees start filling the office and heading to their respective work cubicles. It hits you that you probably have to leave. Because of the open area design of the office, your pheromones can easily be detected by others and they’ll know you’re on your pre-heat - which is kind of embarrassing since it’s seen as taboo and rude to continue going to office once one knows they’re in their pre-heat or pre-rut stage. It’s a customary gesture to just take a leave and stay at home in order to not disturb or distract other employees with your pheromones or even stimulate arousal from your co-workers.
You make a quick email to your ass-of-a-boss, requesting an emergency leave. It was probably more appropriate to ask him directly as he’s literally in the same floor, but you’d rather not encounter him again. With that, you pack your things and leave.
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A/N: Hey! It's been a while but I hope this chapter made up for my absence. Sorry for being inactive lately. It's just... life's been pretty busy ig :>> please don’t feel shy to send in feedback, hearing your thoughts serve as motivation....I'll try replying to your messages hehe... I don't reply much but promise I read through all of them <3 tag list: @aliceoracleollormusic @c-olbybrock @nyamnomnamujoon @bt21chim@fangirl125reader @tinyoonsblog @lexus-stanley @ratherbefangirling@shani-8617 @secretwellwisher @mariana-mmtz @b-e-t-x-s-o@sonderinwanderin @ifyouareme @momoriki @spiderlilyserendipity @yoongi-bear @lvpersona @bigcelebritiesnaturellama@aliceoracleollormusic @duhitzronalyn @purelyecstacy@basicgukk@marslena @missseoulite @sehun096rainbow @hoebii @plutoneu@ignixte@angryperfectionpersona @utterlynuts @yeboi-0418 @thequeen-kat @yessii-i @tenderfrailty @uwu-i-purple-you @childfmoonn@sonnensplitter @mayla548 @jiminie-08 @xyahrinx @ah2002 @tsukispic @xamastraea @mydailylifesstuff @aliceluckycharm @calling-dips-on-j-hope
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00bamc · 2 days ago
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taylor swift series
dust collected in my pinned up hair
right were you left me (evermore)
robin!jason todd x scarlet witch!reader
"jason todd is death. you saw his lifeless body being buried under ground, and cried over the cold stone where the love of your life is meant to rest in peace forever. but how come you are here lying between his arms with his beating heart under you? the love of your life is back and no one would take him from you again."
coming soon
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did the love affair maim you too?
all too well (10 min vers.) (red tv)
actor!kim seokjin x writer!reader
"you were young when you first saw him. . . and it totally broke you when kim seokjin told you if only you have been closer in age, maybe your relationship could have worked. but you know is not the whole truth because you remember him and his love all too well."
coming soon
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peter losing wendy
cardigan, august and betty (folklore)
kim namjoon x reader / kim namjoon x oc
"namjoon regrets ruining your relationship, you debate yourself in deciding if forgiving him is worthy, and the girl who was just a "summer thing" reminisces on what if's."
coming soon
more coming soon . . .
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watchstarscollide · a day ago
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The Comfort of Your Arms | Kim Seokjin
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» Summary | After being stood up and disrespected you turn up at your best friend’s apartment hoping to forget about your night. Jin knows you better than that and provides you the comfort you need. Along with a few things he needs to get off his chest as well.
❥ Pairing | Kim Seokjin x Reader
★ Word Count | 1.3k
» Genre | friends to lovers, fluff, comfort
» Warnings | language, severely insecure reader, self esteem issues, reader talks down about themselves, mentions of drunk sexts, humiliation, angst
↳ AN | The beginning is a text conversation.
You are Bold
Jin is Italic
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Hey, do you mind if I come over?
You can always come over, but weren’t you busy before?
lol. It’s a hilarious story really
? What is?
I didnt tell anyone but I actually had a date
oh...I didn’t even know you were talking to anyone
You remember that guy I had a presentation with in my public speaking class last semester?
It’s him? You’ve been seeing him for this long?
That's the funny part. He actually text me out of nowhere a couple weeks ago and it was just friendly at first but he kept texting me and I kept responding.
okay...
Well you know my friends birthday party was last Saturday? You were going to come with me but then something came up?
I know I’m still really sorry about that
It's fine, for real
Did something happen?
This guy was texting me the whole night. Ugh, I had a few too many to drink and had this dumb idea to start snapping him.
Did you...?
Yeah, I know. It was dumb. But wait, this is where it gets hilarious. He doesn’t text me for a couple days and then asks to meet up tonight. I get stupid excited because I’ve never actually been asked out before. I get ready, I go to the place, I wait for 2 hours and... he never showed! 😂😂😂
Are you okay?
Yeah, I honestly didn’t even like him. But I got all dressed up and now I’ve got nowhere to go so I thought maybe we could hang out. Especially since I didn’t get to see you Saturday
Come over, I’ll order food
Although he wasn’t aware, you were already around the corner from Jin’s apartment as you hit send on that last text. Giving a few loud knocks to his front door, it was only mere moments before you heard shuffling and a voice call out from the other side. Before you were even able to respond, the door swung open and Jin was met with your bright smile. His eye widened in surprise at how quickly you were on his doorstep.
You felt bad barging in on him so late in the night but he was the only person that came to your mind. And you really didn’t want to be alone.
“Sorry, I actually was texting you on the way” you explained, squeezing past him through the door. “Did you order anything yet? What are you in the mood for?”
You bombarded him with question after question as you slipped out your leather jacket and threw it on the back of his couch. That’s when his eyes traveled down and noticed your outfit. You weren’t exaggerating when you said you had gotten dressed up. There you stood in his apartment in a body hugging dress, heels, hair done, and a full face of make up. Jin couldn’t remember a time where you had clearly taken such measures in your appearance before.
He realized quickly you must have left wherever you had your date and came immediately to his place. And the amount of effort you had put in for it showed the pure excitement you must have felt for the night.
Jin spoke your name softly, stepping closer to you past the couch. You turned to him and still had that bright smile on your face.
“How about pizza? I kind of just want to eat a whole pizza, I’m starving” you suggested with a loud laugh. Jin looked down at you with a frown, noticing the smudged mascara around your eyes and the noticeable redness around your nose.
The food was the last of his concerns, you however were the first of them.
“Are you okay?”
You waved him off, “I’m fine! I’m just so hungry, waiting in a restaurant and not being able to order food is so hard! And the looks you get are so embarrassing” you laughed even harder.
Jin stepped closer to you, resting his hands on your arms,”It’s okay to be upset”
You shook your head and looked away from him, the smile you wore slowly dropping from your lips. He moved his hands up your shoulders and to your face, forcing you to look at him again. The softness his eyes held as they met with yours hit you like a ton of bricks.
You weren’t okay, you weren’t okay at all.
Your front broke without a word as tears quickly filled your eyes and blurred your vision. The overcome of emotion sent you straight into Jin as your arms flew around his waist and face pressed into his chest. He had no hesitation as he wrapped his arms around your form, hugging you tight against his body as you sobbed into his shirt.
“I feel so fucking stupid” you cried, “I’m so dumb for sending those pictures and I’m even dumber for thinking he was actually interested in me!”
Your words tore at Jin, “You’re not stupid, he is.”
“Yes I am!” You pushed out of Jin’s arms. Tears were running down your face at an explosive rate, your mascara and foundation coming off in streaks with each descending tear. “I get all dressed up for the first guy to ever fake an ounce of interest in me. I can’t believe I thought anyone would be interested in me, look at me!”
Jin quickly reached out and brought you back into his tight embrace as you cried even harder. “Please don’t say stuff like that”
“It’s the truth”
“No it isn’t” He held you closer and closer with each wretched sob that left your body.
“Look at me” he said softly, moving back slightly and putting his hand under your chin to force your attention. Though you expected that you looked a mess, you didn’t expect the redness and gloss to Jin’s own eyes.
“You’re beautiful” he said softly, caressing your cheek. Your already flushed face reddened even more under his gentle touch.
“Don’t say stuff like that” you told him, “Especially if you’re just trying to make me feel better about myself”
“You’ve always been beautiful, He pressed on, “And smart. And funny. And amazing. You’re perfect, this guy is blind to not see that but I see it.”
“Stop, Jin. You’re really not helping” you warned him. In reality it was hurting you more. It brought up feelings and emotions for Jin you had been trying to push away for so long. These were words you dreamed of hearing from him for years while you sat telling yourself you’d be content with just his friendship. Meanwhile, wishing every guy you spoke to would make you forget about your feelings for your best friend.
“And I’m stupid too. I should’ve told you this a long time ago” He moved closer to you, resting his forehead against yours.
“What are you saying?” You asked softly. You swore your heart was beating so hard that it was audible between the two of you. He stared into your eyes, a small smile threatening the edges of his lips.
“I’m trying to tell you that I love you”
For a moment you wondered if that night was a dream or a sad nightmare filled with humiliation and everything you wanted but couldn’t have. But as Jin ran his fingers through your hair and pulled you into a deep kiss, you decided it didn’t even matter.
If it was a dream, you hoped you’d never wake up.
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i-am-baechu · 2 days ago
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A CEO who loves his son with all his heart starts to feel lonely from being divorce for five years. When he’s son starts getting into ice skating, he drops him off to a class where he meets the blunt teacher, Y/N. Will the ice princess show him a new way to celebrate Christmas or will they end up lonely this Christmas like every year?
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helenazbmrskai · a day ago
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Hospital Playlist [Drabble 1]
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Pairing – Surgeon! Seokjin x Reader
Genre – Doctor AU, Fluff, Single Dad AU, Drabble
Summary – [It’s that dreaded time of the year for your annual check up but this year your encounter with a little girl lands you a date with a cute surgeon at the end of the day.]
Warnings – mention of blood draw for medical purposes, mention of surgery, you don’t like hospitals, you have an autoimmune disease, checkups
Word Count – (2k)
Menu: 
Masterlist l Be part of my permanent taglist to recieve a notification when I upload a new fic or send an ask!
Author note. It’s Jin’s birthday in a couple of days! I planned four little drabbles because he was born on the 4th of December. The idea came to me yesterday when I was drawing my mom’s blood for her health check up but she hates to wait in line in the hospital so I usually do it and then she just drops by the lab. So this is self indulgent because I have an autoimmune disease. Well you got the concept even though the unnecessary TMI I just shared hehe
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You nod your head as a silent thanks to the taxi driver. The building is huge towering over you the more you walk closer to the entrance. Hospitals are not your favourite places to be but your annual check up this year is something that you can’t avoid. Know what they say, new city new doctor – you literally don’t know anyone who says that but whatever.  
”Yes mom I’m heading towards the building right this moment as we speak.” You playfully roll your eyes as she goes on and on about how important it is to check if there’s any level of antibody in your blood and as she likes to say it – if you cheated on your diet or not. The last couple of years you didn’t have the time to visit the doctor and to be honest if you already know that you’re making sure your diet is on point you see no reason why you should go to these annual checkups. It’s the end of November it’s freezing cold out here and you could drink a cup of hot cocoa instead of getting lost at these long corridors on a Monday.
”Look, I’ll call you after I’m done here ok?” You end the call when you realise you’re utterly lost inside this huge building.
It’s stupid that you thought that you can find your way to Dr Kim’s office in this maze. A bigger hospital in a bigger city makes sense you’re not at the little town that you grew up in anymore. No one is really walking by you so you assume you’re not at the right place, as usual. You turn on your heel and head back when a little girl just runs by you.
You don’t see a guardian with her and there’s no one in sight you couldn’t live with yourself if something happens so you follow the little girl and try to catch her attention. She finally stops at the end of the corridor and she has the biggest toothy grin that you’ve ever seen.
”Where are your parents, honey?” You crouch down in front of her and help her detangle the ribbon in her pigtails. The one who did her hair seemed to not know what they were doing so you fixed it as it already come halfway undone.
”My dad works here he’s a doctor. I was in his office because the usual babysitter couldn’t come today but I got bored so I left. I got lost.”
”I’m lost too maybe we can find the way back together?” You reach out for her to hold your hand and she immediately latched onto your arm. Swinging your hands back and forth playfully. She’s a bright kid she keeps chatting your ears off all the way back to the reception taking you off your feet with her jokes that she heard from his dad.
”…Yes she has two red ribbons tied to her hair and she’s this tall and she’s only seven years old. I can’t find her anywhere.”
It seems like you’re at the right place you only caught half of this man’s frantic explaining but you can tell that this little girl by your side is who he’s talking about to the security. He’s wearing a white coat, a doctor just like Eunhee said. From this angle, you could only see how tall he is and how wide his shoulders are. He looks attractive even from the back what the hell.
”Dad!”
Her father turns around when he hears her yelling but she doesn’t let your hand go and runs off to him like you expected instead she starts to pull you by your intertwined hands in his direction. ”Dad! Look! She fixed my hair!”
You try not to giggle when you remember the state her hair was before. No wonder the pigtails looked so messy it was made by a man probably in a rush in the morning.
Eunhee lets your hand go when his dad gets on his knees to hug her he looks relieved now that she’s in his line of sight.
”I told you not to wander off. I was so worried.” You could listen to his voice all day. Even if it’s him scolding his daughter. He’s even more handsome up close you can’t wait to gush about him to your mother on the call when you eventually leave. This visit might be worth it after seeing such beauty. It should be illegal for men to look this good. You bet he works as a cardiologist he probably fixes hearts for a living. (Well he could come and fix your heart.) Now that you can see the front of his coat you could read his name. Dr Kim Seokjin.
You were about to leave now that you’re done you’re too shy in his presence to talk to him but the handsome doctor catches up to you before you could disappear. He has his daughter in his arms her little feet are dangling on either side of his hips. You find them both adorable as she holds onto his dad like a little monkey.
”Wait. I want to thank you for leading my girl back. My name’s Seokjin. Can I know yours?” You shake his outstretched hand after you utter your name. He thinks you’re pretty cute. Seokjin wonders if you’re a patient here or have here someone to visit. He hopes it’s not your boyfriend though. You try to appear confident and look into his eyes but it’s hard to maintain the eye contact. Eunhee doesn’t pick up on your awkwardness as she answers instead of you when his father asks what brought you here at the hospital.
”Right. I have an appointment with Dr Kim Taehyung the gastroenterologist but I got lost. This is my first time in this hospital I moved here last month so I’m still exploring the city and everything.” You catch yourself before you could talk about more unimportant things to the handsome doctor but he finds your nervous blabbering quite charming.
”I could show you the way.” Jin smiles in your direction and places Eunhee down on the ground now that he’s not in a hurry to catch up to you. He takes her hand but what surprises you both is that she reaches for your other hand swinging your arms back and forth like she did before. It could be a cute habit of hers seeing that his father is not that fazed about it.
”No it’s fine! I was about to ask for help from one of the nurses I bet you’re busy.” You stand there awkwardly waiting for the ground to swallow you whole but unsurprisingly it doesn’t happen and Eunhee is still holding onto your hand.
”I’m not busy. Until my next surgery, there’s still … 3 hours or so. Let’s go.” Seokjin looks at his watch for emphasis and winks. Freaking winks in your direction! You might need CPR. If it’s just a dream and you’re sleeping they better not wake you up.
You just nod and follow them you can’t do much as Eunhee holds your hand hostage. Jin thinks it might be a good sign that his daughter took a liking to you so soon. She’s normally not that bubbly with strangers but she does seem to genuinely like you.
You treat her like your own you listen to her stories and engage in conversation even though you just met her. His family is everything to him and seeing how good you are with children it’s just adding to the list of why he wants to ask you out on a date. He really hopes that you don’t have a boyfriend that he doesn’t know about.
You get a few curious looks from the nurses as you pass them but the doctor next to you doesn’t even give them a second glance.
It might be a weird sight to see his daughter and some stranger walk hand in hand. The hospital staff probably knows Dr Kim better than you considering that you just met him a few minutes ago. This is probably a rare sight they might not know who is her mother. Work stuff and personal life are separate things after all.
What if they mistook you for her mother? Oh, no and now you’re blushing just thinking about it! You assume that he’s a single dad. You can’t say it for sure and it would be weird to ask about it all of a sudden. Eunhee didn’t mention her mother to you when you asked and otherwise, she wouldn’t need a babysitter right?
”So…you’re a surgeon?” Seokjin beams when you choose the opening to ask a question about him now that his daughter is momentarily out of things to say. To be honest you just hate the silence that settled in and another part of you want to spend this short walk to Dr Kim Taehyung’s office to get to know him a bit better before you never see him again.
You’re oblivious to his stares and how he contemplates in his head how to ask you out without sounding like a creep.
”Yes I’m an oculoplastic surgeon. I specialise in eye surgery in short.” You smile when he immediately simplifies the term in case you’re not familiar with the word.
”I had a five hour long surgery in the morning this is why Eunhee got so bored alone in my office. It was supposed to be a routine one but the new intern messed up so I had to…”Your mother is a nurse so you know more than average but you don’t correct him as he keeps explaining his duties as a surgeon. You like to hear him talk more since he sounds so passionate about his work.
”Sorry I’m probably boring you with my doctor talk.” Seokjin suddenly stops mid sentence and rubs the back of his neck.
”I’m not bored. I like to listen to you.” You’re quick to correct him that makes you flush with embarrassment when you realise how eager you seem. You hope he doesn’t think that you’re weird. While in reality, Seokjin thinks that you might be the woman of his dreams.
Eunhee tugs on both of your hands to hurry up breaking the small bubble that you found yourself in. You’re a little worried that she’s leading the way but you hope that Dr Kim would tell you if you were going in the wrong direction.
”Well we’re here.”
You three stop in front of a white door. The wooden plate shows Dr Kim Taehyung in bold letters. You swear you walked by this corridor before when you were searching but you’re glad you got lost. You got to meet this handsome doctor and his cute little daughter they definitely made your stay here a pleasant one since you normally dread hospitals.
”Thank you for showing the way, Dr Kim.” You try not to sound so disappointed now that your limited time with him come to an end. Your face is like an open book to the doctor and it gives him the needed confidence boost to finally say something.
”There’s no need for formalities between us. I’m not your doctor so call me Jin please. Also, it would be weird to call me Dr Kim as I’m about to ask you out for coffee.”
”W- what?” Your eyes are twice their size as you realise the handsome doctor that you’ve been drooling over since you laid your eyes on him just asked you out on a date. Damn. Now you’re positive this is a dream. It’s too good to be true.
”What do you say Y/N would you like to go on a date with me? I’m busy but I could always make time when it involves coffee and a cute girl.” And there’s that wink again. How could you say no? So instead you say yes.
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tangerineyoongles · a day ago
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Scumbag Chapter 2
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Pairing: ??? x Scumbag!reader || wc: 2.7k || Genre: Angst, Smut, some Fluff || Fic type: cafe!AU, Fleabag!AU || Rating: 18+
Warnings: Alcoholism, character death, car crash, angst, implied smut
Summary:  Poor, tired, utterly lonely, a pathological liar, and kleptomaniac. Oh, not to mention an absolute alcoholic. Life had not dealt you a favorable hand, but instead of trying to make the best of it, you live your life with a bitter kick in your step, taking anyone and everyone you can down with you.
What a fucking scumbag.
A/N: Here’s chapter 2! A little bit more back story and over just angst.
Italics=flashbacks
Previous Chapter || Masterlist || Next Chapter
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Sunlight spills through the windows, only making you want to screw your eyes shut tighter. You just wanted to sleep, forever if you could, but morning was beckoning you awake. Slowly, you peel open your eyes and the light berates you, temporarily blinding you. When you come to, your surrounding are not your usual bedroom surroundings. Why weren’t you in your bed? Where the fuck were you?
Tall windows, blue walls, book shelves, unsteady tables, dear god this was the fucking shop. You fell asleep in the shop. How? Oh yeah, you walked into the shop at one in the morning and decided to get even more plastered than you already were.
//
“Are you seriously drunk right now?” Jin cries, gripping at your lax shoulders, trying to hold you up.
“Maybe.” You slur, only partially coherent.
“We have to fucking open shop in the morning. You’re going to be hungover.” He reaches for the bottle in your hand and you desperately try to pull away. “Give me that! That’s enough.” He eventually snags the bottle out of your hand and runs off to hide it.
“Jin! Give it back! I’m fine I just want one more little drink! Just a bit!”
He returns with a glass of water and hands it to you gently.
“There, there’s your little drink. Now drink it up, I’m going to make you drink seven more of these before you go to bed.”
“Tequila?” You ask, hope glittering in your eyes.
“Water. Drink.”
A frown falls upon your face, but you do as you’re told. Alcohol was a girl’s best friend in college, especially right after said girl’s mother had died, but for Jin, the drinking act was getting old. He just wanted you to be safe, healthy, not drown yourself to death with liquor and get liver poisoning. Was that too much to ask?
//
It was now past 7 am. You didn’t have time to go home and make yourself presentable if you wanted to open on time, so you were just going to have to open shop looking like a hungover piece of shit. Awesome.
You run to the restroom in the back and splash water on yourself, trying your best to clean up as much as you can. You opt to keep your coat on to cover up how dirty your top had become the night before, curse you for being a messy drinker. It was the best you could do, all you can hope for now is that no one notices.
And quite frankly, no one does, because almost no one comes in as usual. The day was starting off just wonderfully. At the rate things were going, you’d lose the shop by the end of the year. Money was clearly not in your fortune lately. In fact, you were practically desperate enough to rob the next person who comes in of everything they have.
“Good morning.” A gruff voice comes from the front door, timid steps from old bones make the wooden floors creak. Your step-father. Not the most ideal person to rob of all their money.
“Oh, morning!” You want to question why he’s here, but you won’t push your luck. “Can I get you anything?” At the very least, you can scam a few bucks from him.
“Ah, no, thank you.” He stands silently, awkwardly, looking around at the small shop. It seems as though he wants to say something, it’s on the tip of his tongue, you’re already ready for this encounter to be over with.
“Is there… something you need?” You ask cautiously.
“Well, uh. You see I was just in town and I-” He pauses to look at you. The eyes of a once lively man all burnt out, you have a feeling it’s partially your fault. Mostly your fault, probably. “You see, last night I got several calls from you…” He begins.
What? You never called your step-dad. You quickly pull out your phone and open up the phone app. Immediately, your eyes are met with the most horrifying thing you have ever seen in your life. Call after call after call to different people. Why the fuck would you do that? And how were you drunk enough to not remember?
“It was probably about 3 in the morning. Now I didn’t know it was you until I woke up this morning, I thought it was just prank calls or something of the sort.”
“Dad, I-”
He cuts you off before you can attempt to apologize.
“Look, I know-I know you like to drink in your down time, but I really don’t appreciate behavior like this. I was asleep. Try to be a little more responsible next time, alright? Don’t do this again.” He was stern and cold, just like he always had been.
“Alright, dad.” You muster just before he takes his silent leave.
You’re glad he left without another word, or else he may have seen the tears that begin to mist in your eyes.
After a long and desperate drunken night, you reached out in hopes of finding someone, anyone who would save you from the bitter loneliness that flooded your heart. Your dad, your sister, old college friends who you don’t talk to anymore. You even tried to reach out to the number of your dead mother, the number that you have memorized by heart. No answer from anyone. The worst part was instead of stopping by to check on you, to ask if you were okay, all your step-father did was criticize you for your behavior. He didn’t care, he never did.
//
“I’m actually adopted. Sort of.” You say casually, leaning against the sofa, keeping your gaze away from Seokjin.
“Really?” The young man inches closer, curious to know more about his new friend.
Your mother had just died, mere months before you began college. You were still utterly bitter about the fate you had been dealt.
“Yeah. My mother married my step-dad and he adopted me into his family. Now that she’s gone him and his family is really all I’ve got.”
Jin smiles but your frown only deepens.
“He seems like a good man!”
“Not even close.” You sigh. “He’s a controlling asshole. If my mother really had to die I’m glad it was right before I moved out of that godforsaken home. I don’t think I could have continued living under his roof without her.”
“Oh, I’m sorry I didn’t- I-” He pauses to take a breath and refocus himself. “I’m sorry about your mother.”
You can’t help but let a smile pull to your face, wanting nothing more than to giggle at his little flustered state. “Thanks.”
//
Fuck it. You decide to close a little early. It’s not like anyone was going to come in anyways, right? You set the shop’s sign to closed and begin cleaning up. Cleaning was a bit therapeutic in a way. You fucking hated it, but it took your mind off things when you were too focused on getting stains off the counter.
Once all the work is done, you step out and lock up, ready to take your leave. Outside, you catch sight of the cute flower shop owner, maybe he was locking up too.
“Say, how well does a shop like yours do here?” You ask in hopes of making light conversation.
He doesn’t seem shocked to hear your voice at all, almost like he wanted you to talk to him, like he was expecting it.
“I’d say it does pretty well. Though I can imagine yours does much better.” He says with a wide smile.
“I wish. If that damn Barnes and Noble wasn’t across the street, we’d probably be doing fantastic right now!” You laugh, not noticing how easily the word we slipped in.
“Anyone else run the shop with you?” Jimin noticed though, and his curiosity was apparent.
“Yes. Well, no. Sort of.” Yes, physically you ran the shop alone, but it didn’t always feel like it. Jimin raises a brow, waiting for you to elaborate. “Right well, you see, me and my fiancé opened this shop together originally, but he died. Car crash. He wasn’t in a car he was walking, someone hit him.” You say all too casually.
//
The night is dark, you can hardly see outside the shop windows. Cars seldom pass through these streets at this time of night. Jin knows it too.
Perhaps that’s why he allowed his steps to be so reckless.
Your body moves with out you thinking, almost against your will. The sight that meets your eyes the second you exit the shop feels unreal. It can’t be real.
You see the lights reflecting in the window before you hear the car horn, you think nothing of it at first. That is until you hear the car come to a screeching halt, until you hear screaming.
The scene around you fades, you can only focus on what’s directly in front of you. You can’t hear, you can’t think, you can barely speak. And the only words you seem to be able to pull from your lips is:
“Jin!”
//
Jimin’s eyes widen and he pulls back in shock.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry.” He says, looking as though he’s ready to jump into action and comfort you, an almost stranger he met for the first time only a day ago.
“Oh no don’t worry, it was ages ago.” More like a few months ago, but what’s the difference.
His face is still marred with a frown, part of you finds it cute. Wow, he really was an attractive man. He opens his mouth, ready to say something, it looks like it was going to be profound, but the sound of his phone ringing cuts him off.
“Sorry.” He says, pulling it out of his pocket. You can’t here who’s on the other line, but his response of “Oh hey babe” tells you all you need to know.
So much for starting a holiday romance with your cute flower shop neighbor. You offer him a wave of parting and decide to take your leave.
The day had been long and seemingly endless, especially after your step-father showed up. There was only one thing you could do after that god awful encounter.
Visit your mom.
Even in death, she was always there for you. Your rock, literally considering you talk to her gravestone on a regular basis.
“Hey mom.” You say, plopping on the bench that’s across from her grave. A sea of names and dates lays itself before you, but you only care about the one engraved into the mossy stone at your feet. “Today was kind of shit, to be honest. Oh sorry, I should ask about your day first, shouldn’t I? How have you been?”
You probably looked fucking insane, talking to your mother’s grave like this, but you didn’t care. Honestly had it been the other way around, you feel as though she would have done the same thing. You and your mother were a lot alike. She was kind of a hot mess, always blowing away her money, smoked too many cigarettes, you’re not sure how or why your step-father, AKA: Mr. Prim and Proper ever decided to marry her. Even with her flaws, she was a wonderful mother. She was kind and caring and protected you for as long as she lived.
“Mom, you know I’m really fucking lonely right now, right? Kind of your fault. Also Jin. Say hi to him for me.” You smile and shake your head, trying to hold back a laugh. “Oh who am I kidding, we both know you’re probably in hell and he’s up in heaven.” The smile slowly fades from your face as the desperation bubbles up in your throat.
“Mom, how do I stop feeling lonely?”
What would she do if she was here, you could only guess.
Tears you had no idea were there begin to drip down your cheeks. You hated crying, really fucking hated it. It was a sign of weakness to you and that’s the one thing you didn’t want others to know about you, that you were weak. You may be an absolute train wreck, but at least to others you were a train made of steel. If anyone saw you like this, they’d see right through your little act.
After a couple hours of silently loathing your life and venting to your mother, you feel like it’s in your best interest to not go home feeling alone tonight, so you call none other that Mr. Sexy, Jung Hoseok himself. He picks up after the first couple rings.
“Hey, you busy tonight?” You ask as you gather your things from the bench and begin making your way out of the cemetery.
He takes a minute to silently think, then he responds. “Nope. Want me to come over?”
“Yes please. And bring something to drink, I’ve finished off the last of my whiskey.”
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Hoseok’s presence is exactly what you needed. A strong drink and good dick. He didn’t offer you a shoulder to cry on, he didn’t offer advice, just ways to forget your worries. That’s all you needed.
“Fuck yeah baby, you’re so tight. I’m gonna- ah!”
Except you’re having trouble getting into it. Honestly, you kind of just wanted it to be over already. The moment he finishes, you push him off, but regret it immediately. You kind of miss the warmth of a body against you.
Usually when he finishes, he’s either up your ass about round two or begging you to call your sister, but not tonight. Instead he sits pensively at the edge of your bed, clearly contemplating something. As rude as it sounds, you never really thought he had a lot going on up there. He was always so happy go lucky and care free, people who don’t think are usually the happiest. Whatever’s on his mind has got you curious.
“Hey, what’s up?” You ask, reaching your hand out to lay upon his shoulder. He jumps a bit at the contact, then settles back in. Something seems off.
A Sigh escapes his lips and you raise a brow in worry, waiting with baited breath for a response.
“I don’t really know how to say this.” He looks at you with big round eyes, shining in the dim light of your bedroom. Oh god, you think you know exactly what he’s going to say. Those are the eyes of a man in love.
Sure, Hoseok was incredibly attractive, well endowed in his lower region, overall a fun guy to be around, but you weren’t ready for all that. You had to let him down gently.
“It’s okay, just say it.” You offer him a pitiful smile.
“I-I think I’m in love.”
You knew it. With a sigh, you gather yourself to give him a direct answer. “Oh, Hoseok-”
“We’ve only been seeing each other for a few months, it hasn’t been serious.” A few months? You only started this a month ago. “But, lately things have felt different with her.” Her? “The truth is, the only reason I came tonight was to make sure I wasn’t going to miss this.” He gestures vaguely to the bed he just devoured you on. “I needed to make sure I wasn’t going to regret losing my hookups.” He takes a moment to look you deep in the eye with a small smile. “And I can safely say that this isn’t worth the true love I have for her.”
How sweet. If you could roll your eyes right now, you would.
“Thank you. I really mean it, thanks for your time. It’s been great. Would have been better if your sister-”
“Alright, alright, you’ve said enough. Go on, get out of here.” You shoo him off the bed and he happily gathers up his clothes.
“It was nice! Don’t worry, I won’t miss you!” He calls from the door.
“Yeah well I won’t miss you either.” You whisper to yourself.
The room grows silent once he’s gone. Hoseok, a man of loose morals, a womanizer, the biggest fuck boy you’ve ever met, on his way to being in a committed relationship. With someone other than you. Not that you wanted to be in a relationship with him, but damn, that still fucking hurt. Even your most reliable hookup didn’t want you in the end.
You sigh as you fall back onto the bed, the never ending loneliness draping over you once again. Maybe it was time to do something about it.
Maybe it was time to get back into the dating game.
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angelsthetics · 2 days ago
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masterlist
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welcome to the angelsthetics masterlist! 
now, considering that this was only made in november 2021, I hope you’d forgive me for the rather empty masterlist. nevertheless, it would mean a lot it if you checked out what I’ve written so far!
go to | home / m. list / faq
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protecting you from another man
popular!bts x reader scenarios
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comfort | taehyung x reader — new !
contrary to common belief, you and taehyung were both happy despite being in an arranged marriage. but when a few shameless rookies are added to the mix, can you be there to help your husband keep his anger at bay?
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brothers | bts x reader (platonic) — ongoing !
you’re the daughter of the famous Chris Martin from the band Coldplay, and also supposedly an only child. but why is it as though you suddenly have 7 new older brothers after your dad collaborates with the world-renowned boyband, bts?
character profile | prologue | the first meet | recording day
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brothers: care series | bts x reader (platonic) — coming soon !
a series of oneshots/scenarios portraying how each bts member individually shows they care for you as an older brother.
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bluewhale52 · a day ago
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Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer
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Summary: Seokjin has an unhealthy desire to win every best costume contest out there. The problem is, you are not willing to be buried in shapeless brown felt with a red nose and a rein around your neck, while Jin is dressed as the handsomest Santa in the whole wide world.
Pairing: Seokjin x gender neutral reader
Genre: established relationship, idol!au
Rating: R+, nothing explicit here but mature language towards the end
WC: <1k
A/N: Day 1 of 12days of BTS project 🎄 Prompts: “I’m not dressing up as Rudolph for whatever kinky shit you’ve got going on!”, “Well, I dressed up as a candy cane last year!”
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“Hey, babe, what do you think of this one?”
You look at Seokjin’s phone and roll your eyes. “Seriously? Jin?”
He returns your look. “Well, we have to win best costume! Or don’t tell me you want Yoongi to win? AGAIN? He doesn’t even put any effort!”
You continue typing on your laptop, ignoring your boyfriend’s rant. He has an unhealthy desire to win every best costume contest out there. Not having a notch in his belt this year has not been easy for him. Best Valentine’s Costume went to Jimin and Taehyung. Best Summer Costume was all Hoseok’s. And, perhaps, the biggest strike of them all, Scariest Costume which Yoongi won while dressing as himself. Seokjin is determined that Christmas is his time to shine. With your assistance.
The problem is, he is looking at costumes that are rather… unflattering. Now, you are not one to go into the company’s Christmas party as a slutty elf, but you are not willing either to be buried in shapeless brown felt with red nose and a rein around your neck, while Jin is dressed as the handsomest Santa in the whole wide world.
“Babe,” Jin tries again, “the reindeer costume looks super comfy. And see, it says here, fleece lining! So you don’t even have to wear anything underneath. You’ll be warm!”
You stare at him.
“What?” He asks innocently.
“I’m not dressing up as Rudolph for whatever kinky shit you’ve got going on!” You slam your laptop close. He jumps a little at your outburst.
“Well, I dressed up as a candy cane last year! And if I remember correctly, you made me!”
You sputtered. “Only because your legs look great in the red leggings! You said so yourself!”
He narrows his eyes at you. “Yes, yes, my legs did look pretty good, didn’t they?”
You huff, sensing victory in this Christmas costume debate.
“But still, we need to go to that party guns a blazing.” Jin is back to his scheming, and you can only sigh in defeat. “Okay, I agree, this costume does no justice to your body. So how about this, we can get you a matching brown top and pants, and we can decorate it ourselves. And, we can paint your nose with a glittery red, and we can bedazzle the collar and rein as well. Oh my Goid, you know what, I’ll DIY my Santa costume too, surely they’ll give us extra points for making our costumes ourselves, right? This is perfect, babe. We’ll have a DIY costume, our theme is amazing, there’s no way we won’t win!”
You stare at your boyfriend, speechless.
“Theme? What the hell is the theme for going as Santa and Rudolph? It just screams sexual fantasy gone wrong!”
“Who says about sexual fantasy?” he shrieks. “You need to get your head out of the gutter. Focus. We need to win best costume!”
You groan out loud then jump onto his lap, knocking his phone out of his hands. He gasps and looks up at you innocently.
“Why don’t we do this, hmm?” You grind your hips down and smirk when he swallows audibly. “Why don’t I dress as Santa, and you can be Rudolph.”
You peck the tip of his nose.
“And don’t you think we need to showcase these legs again, since they’re so strong and muscular.” 
You rub his thighs. Hard.
“Then, if you’re a good little reindeer, you may even get a private show from Santa, hmm?”
You kiss him deeply then straighten up in his lap before he gets a chance to return your kiss. He stares at you, his scheming and calculating moves all forgotten. However, his eyes still gleam with mischief, as they always do, but it’s a different kind of mischief now.
“Now, that’s kinky,” he finally responds with a straight face.
You burst out laughing, falling into his arms as you do. Then you feel his arms tighten around you as he stands up. You automatically wrap your limbs around him.
“All right, Santa! Let’s take you back to the North Pole!” He starts galloping around the living room, with you squealing in his arms.
“Jin! Put me down!” You scream in laughter.
Jin takes another lap around the living room then finally sets you down on the sofa. The laughter in you is suddenly replaced by something more primal when you see him standing right before you, with the tell-tale bulge in his pants.
You glance up at him. “Still want my mind out of the gutter?”
“Oh no, sweetheart,” he licks his lips. “As it turns out, I like my Santa dirty and filthy. Put me on your naughty list, hmm?”
“Gladly,” you bat your eyelashes at him. “You know, why don’t we do this- if you can make me cum in five minutes, I’ll put on that ugly reindeer costume for the party.”
Jin’s eyes widen immediately and he lifts you up within seconds to carry you to the bedroom. He does all that qualifies to be on the naughtiest of lists, but the feelings he gives you are definitely the nicest.
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Reblog if you like this fic! And Thank You for reading! Published 02122021
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minniepetals · 27 days ago
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cry me a river | the promise
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— summary: if you told them about the darkness inside of you, would they still look at you like you're the sun?
— pairing: bts x reader
— genre: angst, slight fluff, mafia!au, arranged marriage!au
— word count: 12.4k
— warnings: violence, hurt and comfort
— a/n: as stated in part 2, there's no taglist
— part one / part two / part 3
— masterpost
The bodyguard utters a curse and, despite his injured arm, he picks you up and begins to run.
Run and run as fast as he can, while you shake tremendously as the world haunts your every thought.
It’s scary, so scary you can’t control anything around you.
Not even yourself.
Especially not yourself.
You don’t know how much time has passed, you don’t even remember when you were set on the floor or where you are but all your body does is scream danger. Everything is danger. You reach out for the bodyguard who is about to leave you, in fear, wanting him to stay but not being able to utter a single thing and it’s frightening. So frightening. You feel like the last thing that can save you is slowly slipping away.
Someone snatches your hand from reaching out and you scream in silence.
Afraid.
So afraid.
Your bodyguard is just a few feet away but someone’s holding you back and—
“Y/N!”
You shake violently until the images of Seokjin come into view.
Ah.
He’s the one who grabbed you.
You’re safe. It’s Seokjin.
Seokjin.
You want to call his name, tell him what happened, that you’re afraid, but no words come out and you’re just frantically opening your mouth with nothing but the shortness of breath the only thing you can hear. The tears begin to blur your vision and you panic because you can’t see him but you feel his strong hands cupping your face and bringing his forehead to rest right against yours.
“I’m here. I’m here,” he repeats in a soft, soft whisper. Enough for you to hear. “It’s alright, Y/N, you’re safe now. No one’s going to harm you, I’m right here. Breathe, just focus on breathing, don’t focus on anything else right now.”
“I...I-I—”
“You’re alright, just follow my lead. Breathe in through your nose, okay? Can you do that for me? Come on, in,” he breathes in and you follow. Slowly, slowly. “Hold.” You hold. “And slowly exhale through your mouth.” He exhales and you follow. “That’s it. That’s one breath, you’re doing so well. Let’s do it again, alright?”
And so the cycle repeats until you can no longer feel the tensions in your shoulders, until the shaking begins to calm, until you know how to properly breathe again.
And Seokjin stays with you during the whole process, speaking to you, listens to you, and responds in such a gentle voice you lay there in his arms as he holds onto you securely, a sort of comfort you always wanted but never received under the care of your father, or the lack thereof.
But he stays with you the whole time without ridiculing you for anything and sometimes, sometimes you want to think that you don’t deserve his kindness but he doesn’t give you any room for such thoughts. Only the positive ones walk in as you focus in on his calm, soothing voice.
Until the moment your eyes droop and they can no longer remain open. Until he hears your soft, slow breathing and realizes you’ve fallen asleep.
He looks up at the rest who were in the room the whole time, unnoticed by you, who had watched the whole scene unravel before them.
Seokjin’s brows arch with concern while Namjoon stands there for a moment, his jaws clenched, and walks away with a storm following his steps in the hopes of catching the ones who had dared do this to his wife.
.
.
.
“Y/N?”
You jump at the sudden voice which spooks you in the darkness of the corridor, fear creeping in until he comes into the light under the moon peeking in from the curtains and you realize it’s alright, you don’t have to be afraid. You’re fine. You don’t have to be weak.
“Sorry,” you say in a whisper, so soft and barely audible but when it’s just the two of you in the empty hall, he hears it all.
“What are you sorry for? You went through something traumatic this morning,” Hoseok points out and you know, you know, but you’ve always done so well to hide your feelings and have been able to take of things by yourself so why is it that tonight it’s not as easy to control everything?
You’re scared, it’s a feeling you’re all too familiar with but it’s something you can never get used to. And right now being in a place that doesn’t ignore you for everything you do, you think this fears you even more.
Because they’re paying attention.
And now you definitely have to get better at hiding your weaknesses.
Yet the images of Mister Butler and the two dead bodyguards still haunts you and you can’t get rid of them at all.
“You look tired,” Hoseok notes and when he reaches out to hold your face, you flinch back, which causes him to pause midair. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you.”
“No, I…” What are you doing? “I-I’m sorry.”
“...Would you like to return to your room?” He asks as he returns his hand to his side. “Your body must be really drained.”
“No, I can’t,” you quickly shake your head. “I can’t sleep. I-I don’t want to sleep.” The nightmares will only plague your thoughts and you will only wake feeling even more drained. You can’t have that.
Hoseok almost wants to hit himself for asking such a dumb question. Of course you wouldn’t want to sleep and dream of scary things.
“Hoseok, um…” He looks your way when you call his name. “Can I...can I be left alone?”
He pauses for a second and asks, “Do you think it’ll be better for you if I left you alone?” You give him a hesitant nod. “Then no.”
“Huh?” Finally, you look up to meet his eyes for the first time that night.
“With all due respect, Y/N, I’d like to stay here by your side. You’re scared and afraid and confused and right now you don’t know how to deal with it. So wouldn’t it be better to rely on someone else when you’re in this state?”
“But wouldn’t I be a bother?”
He shakes his head sincerely without shaming you for thinking such thoughts. “I’m here because I care, not because I forced myself to.”
You want to say something in regards to that, but suddenly the brightness of the moon begins to dim and when you look up to find clouds slowly moving in the hide the glow of the moon, you find yourself taking a step forward to where Hoseok stands.
“Hoseok…” You don’t like the darkness. It frightens you.
“Yes?”
“Can I make a selfish request?” You ask him.
“Of course,” he says without hesitation although he hasn’t heard what the question is. It makes you wonder just how good of a person Hoseok is. He understands when his lovers aren’t in the mood, when they need comforting and all sorts of things. He observes and understands.
So you try to pick up your courage. “I...I was with Taehyung once and I, may have cried in his arms. And Seokjin helped me calm down from my panic earlier. Do you think...Is it strange that I felt so comfortable and safe around them?”
Hoseok shakes his head. “They do have calming effects.”
“I...I don’t want to, hurt anyone, or make anyone get the wrong idea and upset anyone.”
“You won’t do that.”
“Then...when I’m scared, can I go to you? Can I...Can you hold me?”
He chuckles. “Of course. You can come to me anytime.”
“Then can I come to you now?”
Your cheeks flush slightly but he can still see the fears in your eyes so his face softens into a soft, soft smile, and Hoseok opens his arms for you. “You can come to me,” he says gently.
And so you take a step forward, then another, until you’re close enough to let him wrap his arms around you in a warm, warm embrace.
You stay up with Hoseok that night, talking while in each other’s embrace and without getting a wink of sleep because the nightmares still frightens you.
.
.
.
“From now on your freedom will be restricted and you will not be able to roam the outside world the way you wish to.”
That much was inevitable but hearing it aloud causes a piercing straight through your heart. Just as you were given the free will to spread your wings, the cage closes around you once again and you aren’t sure if there’s any way for you to ever leave again.
Trapped once more with no one to let you out.
The silence whispers into the room as Namjoon observes you from where he sits, watching the way you seem to shrink back with hands that are on your lap tightly gripping the skirt of your dress. You look so small, so fragile, as if at any moment you would shatter right before his eyes and he knows he’s only making things worse.
But this has to be done. He can’t let you roam free anymore, not when there are people out there trying to hurt you.
He still has to find out how they were able to get information on a woman like you, who’s been hidden from the world your whole life. Perhaps involving your father in this matter would be the best decision but then again, if your father finds out his precious daughter was attacked under his care, Namjoon’s sure the reaction wouldn’t be so great. What if he loses you and the marriage—
Wait.
Why does he care if you’re brought back to where you belong?
He was never in true agreement about the marriage. After all, he has his own lovers, so what does a wife matter to him in this life? You’re nothing but a pawn.
Ah.
He doesn’t like that word anymore.
You’re not a pawn. You’re a precious woman who deserves all good things in this life. So wouldn’t it be better if you were brought back to your family? That way you’d be safer.
Yet he’s starting to feel a bit attached to the kind wife who was brave enough to challenge him. And he knows that the others have as well.
He sighs inwardly so that you cannot hear from the silent monologue he just had with himself and returned to your present self who sits before him.
“Hoseok told me you didn’t sleep last night.” You look up slightly, thinking, then give him a small nod. “You look like you can pass out at any moment.”
“I...I-I don’t want to sleep.” Your voice is small, weak, and his brows furrow.
“Because of the nightmares?” You give him a nod and he lets out a small, quiet sigh. “Would it be better if I were to send you back to your father?”
Father.
Your father.
You tremble at the word so simple and small yet so significant you think you can hear the beat of your heart pounding loudly and fast against your heart. “No, I..—” You shut yourself up, forcing the lump in the throat away with a deep swallow as you realize your voice is going to shake. “W..why? I don’t...I-I thought..”
Ah, you can’t do this.
You stand up abruptly from the chair, shaking, with the only thing on your mind being the fact that you have to hide, to leave this room. If Namjoon sees you anymore in this state, he may most definitely want to send you back and you can’t. You can’t do that.
Not now, not after everything.
“Y/N?”
You were so happy. You had your freedom. It lasted for only a split second but that second is so much longer than what you’ll ever receive if you were to return to the house of your Father. The Reaper is dangerous, spiteful, and filled with so much poison you know more than anyone you’d hurt if you were to ever return.
You can’t return.
“Y/N, hey.” You’re about to trip on your own feet upon wanting to escape but feel strong arms holding you up. “What are you doing?”
Ah, you’re scared. You’re scared.
“I...I-I..—” You can’t even form a sentence as the fear crawls up your entire body and you know, you know that if he doesn’t let you be, you’ll break and fall apart and all that image of a perfect, pure and innocent girl will shatter into pieces and you can’t have that. You can’t.
“Y/N.” Yet Namjoon’s persistent.
You want to shake him off, your hands coming up to block your ears from the calling of your name.
You’re scared.
You’re scared.
And Namjoon rounds to the front of your body, placing both his hands over your own, and brings you to sit on the carpeted floor of the room. “Y/N, look at me. Look at me!”
You gasp, breathing shaky, and he holds himself so close to you your foreheads touch. Almost in the way Seokjin had done for you but Namjoon’s a bit more strong, harder. He takes your hands, brings them to your lap, and encloses his large ones over them.
“N-Nam...—”
“Keep your eyes on me, alright?” The tears fall and your hands can’t stop shaking but he keeps calm as your foreheads rest against one another. “What do you see?”
Your brows furrow. “What?”
“What do you see?” He repeats again and your voice, still trembling, begins to answer him.
“I..I-I see...I see you.”
“Right,” he nods. “Go on.”
“I see,” you blink a few times, letting the tears flow, “I see your hair. It’s really..really black.” He hums in reply. “Your..eyebrows, and your lashes. Your lips, your chin, um...And your eyes, they’re...they’re a lot more brown than I imagined.”
“Yeah?”
“Mmn,” you say. “You’re always in the dark so they’ve always been so black to me but, looking at you in this distance, they’re really...they’re not as intimidating as they usually are.”
“Do I intimidate you?”
“At times,” you admit. “Most times.”
He hums. “Now what do you feel?”
“What do I feel?” You squeeze your hand and there he is, right there. “Your hands. They...they’re pretty rough. I-I can feel your calluses. And,” you think for a second, “your fingers are thick. And long.”
He accepts your answer and only prompts you some more. “Do you feel anything else?”
“I…” You can feel more tears welling up long your waterline and bite your lower lip. “I’m sorry,” your voice breaks again.
“You’re alright.” Yet Namjoon remains composed. “What else do you feel?”
“I feel my heartbeat,” you tell him. “It’s pounding really hard and it...it hurts.”
“Your heart?” You nod. “Why does it hurt?”
“Because I’m scared.”
“What are you afraid of?”
“I…” A tear falls and another follows along. “I don’t want to leave,” you say. “I want to stay but I..—I don’t want to be a nuisance.”
“Who told you you were a nuisance?”
“I just thought...I-I thought that when you asked me if, if I wanted to go back, that you mean..meant that you...you didn’t want me anymore.”
“No.” He sighs. “I only suggested sending you back to your father with the idea that you’d feel safer that way.”
You shake your head as you squeeze his hand. Being weak and afraid is inevitable but still, you still remember the fact that you can’t truly show everything before him. You still have to keep the walls up. “I..I-I do miss my father but when I married you...I’m in your hands now, Namjoon. You’re the one responsible for my safety now.”
“Right.”
“If you send me back, father will be angry, and I...I want to stay. Here. With you and Bangtan.”
“...Alright.”
“Will you let me?”
“Mmn.” He nods. “Now tell me what you smell.”
It seems he’s still keeping this game up, though you’re unsure why. Yet you follow his words and sniff the air. “You.”
“You smell me?”
You nod. “Your cologne, it’s...I don’t know how to describe it.”
“That’s alright.”
“But it’s like…” You sniff the air again, this time leaning towards him. “It’s faint but it’s there. You smell like...the smell after it rains. It’s fresh and, and nice.”
He hums. “Anything else?” When you shake your head, he continues. “Now tell me what you hear.”
“My heartbeat.” You take a moment to listen to it, looking down at your chest, before meeting his eyes again. “It’s slowing down.”
“That’s good.” Ah, was that why? He was asking you questions to distract you so that you could focus on your surrounding rather than the thoughts that wished to stray away. Yet at the same time, Namjoon doesn’t leave you to abandon them completely. Those thoughts are just...faintly visible.
“I also hear...the wind.” The both of you turn to look at the window that had been left slightly open. “It’s a little cold.” Namjoon instantly takes his blazer off to put it around your shoulder and your eyes widen. “B-but you might get cold.”
“I’m fine,” he says flatly, “I prefer the cold.”
“Ah.” You nod. “Speaking of, your hands are also a little cold.”
“Are they?”
“Mmn. But it’s nice. It keeps me awake.” He watches you silently as you bring the palm of his hand to rest against your cheek, nuzzling against it to feel more of the cold. He doesn’t know why he’s alright with this but also understands that you wouldn’t have been brave enough to do this if your head was clear.
At this moment your head is still in a vulnerable state and he knows not to act too rashly.
“Do you taste anything?” He asks, continuing on with the last of your five senses. You take a moment to reply before shaking your head. “Did you not eat at all today?” You shake your head again and his brows furrow. “And why not?”
“Because...I don’t know,” you say and he sighs.
“You do understand that there are a lot of people here who care for your well-being, right?” When you don’t answer, he speaks again. “Alright then, would you like me to personally ask each and every one of them?”
“What?” You quickly shake your head. “No, no. That would be a waste of everyone’s time.”
“And you’re wasting your time believing in the things that aren’t true.” You fall silent again. “Why do you fear me, Y/N?”
“You...Isn’t that obvious?” You ask him. “You’re the boss of one of the most powerful mafia.”
“Right. But before that, I am also human, just as I am your husband.”
“But...you’re only my husband for the sake of power.”
“Right, but that doesn’t mean I do not respect you,” Namjoon says. “Engagement and respect, those are two very different things. Do you really believe I would get married just for the sake of power? I’m not that heartless as to run off and marry while I have my own lovers to think of.”
“There was another objective?” He doesn’t say a thing, leaving you to your own thoughts before you realized it. “I’m your pawn, right. You’re allowed to use me in any way.”
“It has its benefit, though at this point I’ve come to realize that I do not want to use you as a pawn anymore.”
You tilt your head to the side. “Why is that?”
“Well first of all, you are no use to me as a pawn. After all, what use is there for someone who is meant to be hidden from the world?” His words are harsh but fairly honest. It’s the brutal truth and you cannot deny that, though for some reason it hurts. “However if I really didn’t care for you, you wouldn’t be here in this very room, now would you?”
“That’s...right.”
“I’ve come to realize that my wife is someone who is much more fragile than she appears to be.” He holds the collar of his blazer to squeeze it closer around your body. “And for that, you are no longer my pawn but someone I wish to protect.” He picks you up effortlessly and begins walking towards the door. “I already failed the first time, I will not fail another time,” he vows with a hard expression resting on his face.
And you?
You’re unsure of what to do.
“W-where are we going?”
“To the dining hall. You need to eat.”
“Wait.” You begin to panic as the door begins to open. “Wait people are going to see us! Namjoon put me down!”
Yet the embarrassment you feel that day does not faze the man one bit.
.
.
.
“We found him.”
Namjoon looks up to find Seokjin walking in with the rest of them following right behind. He drops the pen he was holding and stands without a word.
“Stay,” he orders at the youngest of the three before strolling past them with heavy steps.
There is no hesitation as he walks on, ready to greet the man who had dared to harm his wife.
.
.
.
“I’ll head on to Taehyung’s lab and help out there. You should check up on Y/N.”
With a small nod at Jimin’s order, Jungkook begins to make his way around the building in hopes of seeking you out. It doesn’t take him long, you’re easy to find. He finds you standing before a window with eyes that yearns for the outside world and for a moment his heart aches at the sight.
It’s almost as if he’s the exact reason why you have on such a sad expression. They can’t let you out, not after what had happened, but the way you stand there with a palm resting on the window, eyes searching and yearning so pitifully, Jungkook’s brows arch with guilt. You’re like a trapped bird whose wings have been clipped away and forcefully locked up in a cage.
Their cage.
Would you be happier if you left?
“Y/N.”
You don’t look away from the window when he calls your name but he knows you hear him because you respond, albeit softly. “I had it for a split second,” you say, “just a split second, but that split second was one of the most precious and happiest seconds I’ve ever had.” You pause for a moment, breathing in. “And now it’s gone.”
.
.
.
“Shin.” A simple word uttered, calm and collected, yet anyone can tell just how much venom is filled in that simple name. Namjoon remains as emotionless as ever, but when he takes his foot to step on the hand of the man, the scream which rages in response is enough to showcase the anger he has yet to release. “What a coward you are, going after a woman. You’ve gotten really low considering I was kind enough to let you off for months. Or was that it? Did little Shin get lonely because I kept ignoring him?”
The moment his fingers slip from Namjoon’s foot, Shin automatically retreats back as he holds his hand in pain, but he doesn’t get too far when his back hits the foot of Hoseok who stands right behind him, an intimidating glare leveled right at him.
For a moment he falters back, scared out of his mind, before deciding to taunt the Bangtan boss right back. “So, I hit the nail right in the head, huh? You..s-she meant something to you, huh?”
“And if she does?”
He laughs aloud for a second but the moment he finds Namjoon’s eyes, it shuts him up immediately.
.
.
.
“Do you pity me?”
When you finally look on over at him, Jungkook almost gasps at the sight of tears running down your face and in a split second, he’s right at your side.
“You’re crying,” he whispers as his hand automatically reaches up to hold your face and brush away the tears. But it isn’t enough to keep them away.
“I’m scared,” you say with a voice so soft, so frail, and weak. “What do I do, Jungkook?”
.
.
.
“You already have six lovers, Kim Namjoon. You can never be satisfied, huh? I pity the mistress.”
Mistress.
“I do not recall giving you permission to utter my name.”
“Though she can’t be just a mistress to you, can she? I mean why would you be personally coming to kill me yourself if she didn’t matter that much to you? I know you, Mr. Kim.”
“You do not know me.”
“But you do know that I’m right.”
He narrows his gaze slightly, a small glance made Seokjin’s way before quickly reverting his attention back on the man. With the way he regards you, a stranger that just caught his eyes, Namjoon’s sure this man doesn’t know your true identity. “How did you find out about her?”
Shin scoffs. “My men caught sight of her with your two dogs one night.”
That night Jimin and Jungkook took you out.
“So it was just speculation...hurting her.”
“Who hurt her? The only deaths that occurred that day were her two bodyguards.”
With brows furrowing, Namjoon crouches to the floor to grab the man by the collar. His face falls so close to the man it’s enough to leave him to pee his pants. “Those dead men that you killed,” his hand tremble at the tight grip he has on the man as his voice lowers an octave, “are enough to leave her traumatized for the rest of her life.”
“W…” Eyes shaking with fear, Shin tries his best to remain brave. “W-what about it?”
“What about it?” Namjoon raises a brow before scoffing. “You’ve dealt a deep wound to my wife’s heart and now she cannot even rest her eyes without fear of the nightmares that may plague her; that is a transgression I cannot forgive.”
“Your...your wife?” The moment Shin looks up at Namjoon, his vision is blocked by those very hands which come down to claim his head, slamming it down hard at the cold, cement floor below him.
.
.
.
“I’m so tired.” Your head falls against Jungkook’s chest, body feeling so light and limp you aren’t sure how you can still hold yourself up. “I want to sleep.”
He picks you up effortlessly and being too weak to protest or push him away, your head only lays against his chest, where the steady beat of his heart drums against your ear. “I wanna sleep..” Your words fall less formal, more childish, as you whine and whimper in his arms like a child who’s having trouble sleeping but is too afraid. “But the nightmares are so scary, Jungkook. It’s been days and I just wanna sleep. I wanna sleep in peace. I don’t wanna dream.”
He listens to your every word without interrupting you one bit. He listens to your concerns, your whines, and everything that you give him.
.
.
.
Namjoon lets out an exasperated sigh. “I hate getting my hands dirty, you know that?”
He’s down on the floor barely able to move but a shaky touch to his head and he can see the blood all around him. “So just kill me, Kim Namjoon...Kill me already..!”
Yet Namjoon only lets out a laugh. “You’re funny to think I will let you off with a quick death. Not after what you did to my wife.”
“If..i-if I knew she was your wife—”
“You would have done way worse, I know.”
“T-That’s not what I—”
“You’re losing quite a lot of blood, you know. But just as I don’t want to give you a quick death, I will also not give you the privilege to die peacefully.” Crossing his arms against his chest, Namjoon takes a step back. “Hoseok. Yoongi.”
.
.
.
“Y/N?”
You hear Taehyung’s voice at a faraway distance but the hand that reaches over to tuck your hair behind your ear tells you otherwise. Your head lays against the thighs of Jungkook’s. He had settled you down onto the sofa, leaving you to remain still and silent as he runs soothing fingers against your skin.
It’s nice, calming, but no matter how calming this is, you still don’t wish to give in to the exhaustion.
“You’re alright,” you hear Taehyung say and feel Jimin’s hand holding yours and running a small pattern against the back of it. “Just give in.”
“I don’t want to.” You shake your head lightly.
“Don’t force it,” he whispers.
“But..”
“It’s alright. We’ll be here to wake you,” he takes your other hand and squeezes it tight, almost as if that’s to replace a pinkie swear. “We’ll wake you before it gets too much.”
“I’m scared.”
.
.
.
Blood splattered across his suit and face, Namjoon uses the collar of his white dress shirt to wipe the splatter from his face. “Clean this up,” he commands and the lower subordinates are quick to oblige to his demands.
“Namjoon.” He doesn’t turn Yoongi’s way when the man calls for him but he listens as he turns from the room and begins walking away. “About what he said.”
“What about it?”
“You’ve come to care for her, haven’t you?”
Silence falls in, saved by the footsteps that echo as they walk. “Have I?”
“I’d like to think you have.”
“Do you?”
“I wouldn’t mind.”
A small glance towards Seokjin and Hoseok who do not protest and Namjoon lets out a small sigh. “Well,” is all he says. Nothing more, nothing less. As short as he always has been.
“And about the night that caused the enemy to find out about Y/N, will you let either of them know?” Seokjin asks.
He doesn’t hesitate to answer the question. “There is no point in letting any of them waste their time blaming themselves. What’s done is done, we just need to be extra careful from now on. Be silent about what you heard from the man.”
“Yes, Namjoon.”
.
.
.
“I see their eyes, Tae...it was the last thing I saw.”
Mister Butler, those two bodyguards.
“I’m scared.”
He squeezes your hand again and holds your face in a gentle manner, caressing it. “We’re right here,” he repeats again. Over and over again.
Until it is the last thing you hear when your consciousness slips away.
.
.
.
“Namjoon?” The door opens with hesitation, slowly, and then a head peeks into the room before the whole body walks in. You find Namjoon not where he usually is; sat on his office chair, but rather in the middle of the room, on a sofa, with booze and an ashtray on the coffee table. He seems to be lost in thoughts so you call his name again. “Namjoon?” Another gentle call. “Joon?”
“Say that again.”
You blink. “Huh?”
“That name.”
“...Joon?”
“Mmn.” He leans back against the sofa, head hung with his dark hair a little messy. This isn’t like the Namjoon you know. The Namjoon you know was always clean, perfect in every way no matter what time of day it is. Yet now seeing him right here, he looks more...human.
“Are you alright?” You ask as you walk further into the room and take a seat beside him, watching him carefully.
For some reason, you aren’t so scared. Seeing something new usually scares you, booze and cigarettes, because most times new is a bad thing, like the first time you saw your drunk father high on drugs.
Yet despite the fact that Namjoon looks a little more disheveled than usual, perhaps it’s the fact that his tone is still the same as it always has been. No, it’s gotten softer. You aren’t sure exactly when that happened, perhaps it was that night of your first mission, perhaps later, all you’re sure of is the fact that Namjoon is a little different from the man you had first met in that room many months ago.
“I’m fine,” he says but something tells you he may be lying. “And you?” He asks as he turns your way. “Did the nightmares scare you? Is that why you’re here?”
“You know I wouldn’t bother you with insignificant things.”
“No?” You shake your head. “Why not?”
“Well...you have important things to do.”
“I can always hold them off.”
You’re surprised by the way he’s speaking to you, so casually, so kind, kinder than he usually is. “Um,” you shake your head again as you look off to the side, not able to hold that intense gaze of his. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. And besides, Hoseok’s already promised to take care of me when I get scared.”
“Right.” He sounds a little disappointed. “Alright, but for the record, those nightmares of yours are not insignificant in the slightest. How can anything that scares my wife be insignificant?”
He’s using the word ‘my wife’ more often these days.
“Do I scare you?”
You wonder why he’s asking that. “Not at the moment.”
A small noise leaves his lips. “Sometimes your honesty is…”
“Are you...laughing?” Your eyes widen and although you expected the man to shake that thought off, he only looks at you without hiding a thing.
“Do I look more human now?”
Messy hair, dark eyes that can stare straight into your soul, and a small smile that is so rare you never knew you’d ever witness such a sight. But here you are, sitting right beside the man who leaves everyone to shrink in fear at a simple look at him, and here he is smiling right at you.
“Surprised?”
“I am,” you admit.
“You don’t have a filter, do you?” He reaches out and ruffles your hair with his large palm. “Stay that way.”
A filter.
Little does he know.
“Um...are you drunk?”
Namjoon shakes his head. “Perhaps a little tipsy.”
“Did something happen?”
Thoughts of you running through his head. Everywhere, at any time, any day. He had hoped the booze and smoke would leave him to think about other things for a moment but nope. And here you are, not helping the situation in the slightest.
The others may be fine but he’s still conflicted and it’s something that doesn’t usually happen to Namjoon.
You shake his ground, make him second guess, make him doubt himself, and sometimes even cause him to regret the decisions he makes. Is it a good thing? Is it a bad thing? He doesn’t even know the answer to that.
“Is it wrong…” he begins slowly as you lean in a little more, wishing to hear his thoughts, “for a husband to love his wife?”
“Well…” You look a little confused at his question. “Isn’t that the purpose of a marriage?” You ask him. “Though, of course, in some circumstances like with arranged marriages, love isn’t something that can be achieved but I believe that if two people can accept each other despite circumstances, I think it’s quite lovely.”
“Lovely,” he repeats the word. “Then, you’d be alright if I loved you?” The way he stares into your eyes, for a second you aren’t sure how to breathe. But you can hear the beat of your heart skipping a beat and suddenly you don’t know what to do. “Hypothetically,” he says and you blink.
“Right, hypothetically.” You cough. “Um,” clearing your throat, you try to think of the right words to say. “Well in our circumstance, we’d have to consider your other six lovers, right?” You say. “You love them dearly just as they love you. So wouldn’t I just be a thorn in the flesh?”
“Not if they love you too. And if you love all of us.”
“If that happens...I guess that wouldn’t be a problem. But, why are you asking?”
“Why indeed.”
“Hm?”
You wait for him as he gathers his thoughts. It’s a first, watching Namjoon so indecisive and unsure of himself. He is human after all, no matter how coldhearted and aloof he may be at times. He’s still human. “I...I don’t love you,” he tells you, “not yet at least.”
You blink slowly. “Not...yet?”
He lays his head against the sofa, all the while watching your every reaction. “Do you understand what I mean?” Your silence is what gives him the answer and he nods, understanding. “You don’t have to give me an answer now, or us for that matter.”
“Us?”
“You don’t really think I’d spontaneously say such things without confiding in them, do you?”
“...You don’t seem to be the type.”
He laughs again. “How long has it been since we first met?”
You think about it, retracing your memories to those times. “A little over a year.”
“That long, huh?” He takes a glass in hand and downs the remaining liquid. “Well, we have the rest of our lives to hear that answer of yours.”
.
.
.
Is this true?
How? When? Where? Why?
There’s no way this is true at all. I mean, how absurd does it sound hearing that you have seven admirers? But then again, why would Namjoon ever lie to you? Everything that’s come out of his mouth has always been the truth, he has no reason to lie.
But he was tipsy.
But that wouldn’t cause him to outright say irrational things to you.
You never saw it coming, but then again you never really expected anything from them in the first place.
If what Namjoon says is truly real, then how do you feel?
You don’t know how to answer that question. You’ve never been in love before and love is something that causes one to give themselves to the other parties. It means vulnerability, secrets let out, the walls broken down and you aren’t sure if you’re ready for all of that just yet.
It’s what keeps your heart from yearning.
You’ve loved before, loved a mother who passed away hating you for all of your life, loved a father who still hates you to this day, and loved a butler who was the most kindest man, too young to die all because you loved him.
But this sort of love is different. Not in the way a daughter loves her parents, or in the way a little girl will look up and respect someone older than her. This love is different and you’re scared. Because so far love left you scars, love left you hopeless, aching, and it is something your father never wants you to do.
But love always left you wanting more and it is the exact reason why you’re so weak.
You want love and you want to be loved.
Yet just as quickly as that love can hold you, it can leave you cold and broken at the same time.
They don’t know anything, not the truth of your past, nothing. So if you were to turn the lights off and allow them to see the battle scars, the broken pieces, the aching, the torn and ripped up heart you have, will they still accept and love you for what you are?
You’re scared.
You’re scared it can’t be true.
.
.
.
“Hoseok?”
A blind path.
The corridors are dark, empty, and it makes you fear for everything that lies in its path. Yet even then you’re too afraid to go to the windows and rip open the curtains, afraid something will snatch you up, afraid to see the eyes.
But the fear alone can never stop you from wanting to seek out a light, a warmth that has always been able to steady you and calm your nerves.
“Hoseok.” You call his name again, hoping he can hear you, hoping you can find him.
“Y/N?” But another voice comes and when you find his figure rushing to your side, you aren’t entirely disappointed. “What’s wrong?” Yoongi asks and when you look up at him, the genuine concern plastered on his face makes you cry even more.
“I’m sorry,” you say as you wipe your tears, “All I ever do is cry.”
“You’re frightened and that’s not something that should be taken lightly.”
“But two months have already passed since that incident, Yoongi.”
“Trauma isn’t something that leaves you so easily, Y/N.” He’s right, you know he’s right, because no matter how hard you try to forget the last picture you saw of Mister Butler and only wish to remember the good memories, the image of his death can never leave your mind. Not even years later. You haven’t healed from that and you aren’t sure if you ever will.
“I hate it, Yoongi. Please make it stop,” you plead at him as you hit yourself on the head. “Please make it stop, I don’t want to see them anymore. Please—”
“Don’t hurt yourself.” He takes both your wrists in his strong grasp, forcing you to stop. “Please, Y/N.”
“But I…” A few tears escape your eyes and you sniffle. “I’m so scared. What do I do, Yoongi?” Begging and pleading at him is the only thing you can do, and so Yoongi releases your wrists, only to intertwine his fingers in yours.
“Come with me,” he says, softly, and still crying helplessly, you follow the man who walks slowly in order to keep pace with you.
You arrive at a room you’ve never been to before and a single piano lies right in the middle. Without a word, Yoongi leads you to sit right on the bench. He watches you carefully, giving you a small smile when you look at him with the eyes of a lost puppy, and takes a seat right beside you.
He places his fingers right on the keyboard, playing a few cords for a brief moment before the sound of a beautiful melody echoes into the room, ringing so softly and beautifully your eyes widen slightly at the sounds coming out from the simple crossings of Yoongi’s fingers.
And so you close your eyes, letting yourself in the moment, letting your heartbeat calm as it listens to the steady beat of the beautiful melody played just for you.
“Want to dance?”
When you open your eyes to find another man offering his hand for you, you blink at the unexpected guest. “Tae?”
“Looks like you’ve had another nightmare, huh?”
You purse your lips and give him a small nod. “I was doing fine last night.”
He reaches out for you, gently wiping your tears away with his thumb. “Dance with me,” he asks you.
“But I don’t know how to dance,” you frown and he chuckles lightly.
“Just follow my lead.”
With one look Yoongi’s way, who gives you a small nod, you accept the hand Taehyung offers you, and in the room filled with nothing but a single grand piano, you follow the steps of Taehyung, slow dancing in your white, flurry nightgown, listening to the soft melody of Yoongi’s playing.
The moon up above shines right into the room, past the windows, past the curtains, and you twirl about under the guidance of Taehyung, giggling slightly when he catches you during times you almost lose your steps.
Normally you wouldn’t do such a thing, normally you’d fall embarrassed were you to make a mistake, but right here in this room where two men watch you with gentle gazes so soft and tender, you find yourself feeling so much lighter and freer than ever before.
Soft laughter, light steps dancing around the room, with a piece of beautiful music played, you think this is the first time you’ve ever felt happy since the tragic incident that left you hurting for days on end.
This is happiness.
This is freedom.
And perhaps this is what receiving love feels like.
.
.
.
“You stayed up again.”
The way the boss stares down at you from his tall height, you know you can’t go up against those disappointed eyes so you find yourself instinctively hiding behind Yoongi. Not only that but this is the first time you’re seeing him since his tipsy confession and you aren’t sure how to face him just yet.
Yoongi, a little taken back by you using him as a shield, sends Namjoon an awkward look before clearing his throat. “If there is anyone to blame, please lecture me instead.”
“W-wait!” You quickly peek your head out, shaking it hard. “Yoongi was only trying to help, you can’t blame him for my lack of care.” A single glance made your way by Namjoon and you’re quick to hide once more.
The boss lets out a sigh, understanding your shy state and knowing not to provoke you any further. “Get some breakfast,” is all he says before he walks off in his usual charismatic ways while you find yourself looking after his back, wondering why he’s letting you off so easily today.
“Come on,” Yoongi places a hand on your shoulder, “you need to eat.”
.
.
.
“Hoseok?”
He jumps slightly at your voice and when he turns to find you, Hoseok stands up tall again with a bright grin as if he wasn’t just making a painful expression just seconds before.
“Ah, Y/N. Something wrong?” He asks, standing in an awkward position and you frown at the sight.
“No um...what about you?”
“Me?” He chuckles as he walks on over to ruffle you on the head. “I’m fine, babygirl.”
“Baby..-” Your cheeks instantly flush at the endearing nickname, causing Hoseok to laugh aloud at how cute you are.
“Sorry, that just came out. I won’t call you that again if it makes you uncom—”
“No, um...it’s fine.” He raises a brow when you refuse to meet his eyes, head facing the floor with a hand covering your mouth and Hoseok smiles at the sight. “But, um, that wasn’t what I was—” You clear your throat and look up at him, expression a little more serious this time. “You can come to me too, you know.”
“Huh?” He’s not entirely sure what you mean.
“When you get scared,” you say, “it doesn’t have to be just me going to you. You can come to me too. For anything.”
A precious little thing scared of most things, offering to become someone else’s shield. But he guesses that’s your charm. No matter what goes on around you, you’re willing to lend a helping hand and show kindness towards the people around you.
“I can hold you too. I can give warm hugs, I promise.” Two arms opening wide, eyes looking up at him expectantly and Hoseok lets out a short, small laugh.
Cute.
How cute.
And he’s only falling more and more.
“You...you’re not helping me out one bit,” he mutters under his breath, a hand coming to cover half his face to hide the blush that had formed on his cheek.
“Huh?”
“No, I…” Hoseok clears his throat and looking at you, he doesn’t know whether to cry or smile. But why choose any of those options when he can just hide in your arms? “May I?” He asks and you give him a quick nod, eyes smiling and watching him with kindness.
So who is he to refuse your offer?
And you were right. Your arms are indeed warm, so warm, and even though he doesn’t say anything else in that moment, you accept him for who he is, the silent man behind that mask. Because everyone has their moments, everyone needs a little break, Hoseok included. He feels your sincerity right there, so gentle and sweet.
Ah, he wishes you could be theirs.
.
.
.
A small finger places itself right upon the furrows between his brows.
“What are you doing?” Namjoon asks and the crease only deepens.
“You’re frowning,” you say as if you aren’t touching the face of one of the most feared mob bosses. “Frowns don’t look good on you, Namjoon. You’d look much better if you smiled a little more.”
“You’re saying my resting face doesn’t look good?”
“What? Who said that?” You say as you cross your arms at the accusation. “Your resting face is handsome but this face screams stress.”
“Does it?” He stops writing.
“Mm. Being stressed doesn’t look good on you. Though I guess that means I’m saying you don’t look good most days since you’re always stressed, huh?” His frown deepens when he glares up at you and you burst out laughing at the sight. “I’m kidding! I’m kidding! Please don’t kill me! I promise you’re handsome!”
“What bold words coming from someone who was just making fun of my face.”
“I was kidding!” A bit fearful you may indeed face Namjoon’s wrath, you’re quick to hop on your feet and run to the door. “Anyways, catch you later! I’d rather see my grave than catch Kim Namjoon’s wrath, you’re scary when you’re mad.”
Namjoon crosses his arms as he stands from his seat, slightly confused as he narrows his gaze at you. “You’ve never faced my wrath.”
“And I’d like to keep it that way!” And with that, you’re out the door before he can say anything else.
A small smile curls along the corner of Namjoon’s lip.
.
.
.
“What’s wrong?”
You blink at Seokjin’s question and hide yourself a little more behind your door. Had he already figured it out? But how? All you did was open the door slightly upon his knocks.
“Uh,” you clear your throat, trying your best to hide your raspy throat, “what do you mean?”
“You haven’t been out of your room at all today,” he notes.
“Oh,” you say. “I see.”
Brows furrowed, he narrows his gaze with suspicion. “It wouldn’t be so out of the ordinary when you first arrived here but a year has already passed and if anything, your restriction of freedom will only allow you to leave your room the moment you wake up. So something must be wrong.”
Gosh, why were they always so observant about everything? But then again, mobsters are smart like that so you shouldn’t be too surprised.
Still, you refuse to give in to your stubbornness. “Nothing’s wrong, I promise.”
“That’s one broken promise.”
“Huh?”
“Tell me what’s wrong or I’ll go to Namjoon,” he threatens and you quickly protest to that, door opening a little more.
“Don’t you dare!” Raising your voice only makes things worse but it’s far too late to regret anything at this point when your coughs get too much to keep it in. Seokjin’s brow raises and you’re quick to try to slam your door closed but he’s too fast for you and in just a split second, he’s already gotten into your room with the door closed behind him. “Deng it.”
“Right.” He sighs and goes on to place a hand on your forehead, only you refuse to be anywhere near him and quickly back away.
“You’ll catch my cold,” you tell him as you cover your mouth and a few coughs leave you.
“Let me help you.”
“No way.”
“Come on, sweetheart, don’t be stubborn.”
“But I don’t want you to get sick,” you pout. It’s adorable but it isn’t enough for Seokjin to forget about your sickness.
“Alright then,” he crosses his arms against his chest, “would you rather I stay here and help you or leave and report this to Namjoon?”
You think about the choices for a moment because quickly falling into despair because it’s honestly not much of a choice. “You’re so cruel, Jin.”
He chuckles in amusement. “Then go on, be a good girl and lie in your bed.”
You almost feel like a little kid when he sends you off and, with heavy steps, you walk on over to your bed, where he helps you tuck in.
It isn’t as bad as you thought when you lie there, letting Seokjin take care of you. You’ve never had someone take care of you when you were sick. You’ve always been a healthy girl, thankfully, but during those rough days, you always suffered the most while having no one to rely on. Rather, even on sick days you were still forced to do things your father ordered you to do.
How cruel it was for him, forcing a sick kid out of bed without a care in the world.
A cruel man.
Hence you always tried your best to not let yourself get sick.
And for a second you were scared today, afraid you’d have to spend another lonely day. But here’s Seokjin, sitting right beside you with a white mask on to prevent himself from catching your cold.
“At least you haven’t caught a fever.” His voice is gentle, his hands are warm when he feels your skin, and you’re beginning to get really sleepy. But on days like this, nightmares are scary. When you get sick, your mother always comes to visit you in your dreams and you hate it.
“What’s wrong? Too stubborn to sleep now?” You think about what to respond to that but eventually just nod your head. “If you’re scared of dreaming, you can say that,” he tells you, “You don’t have to be ashamed of it.”
“...How is it that, you just know?”
Seokjin chuckles and reaches out to ruffle your hair. “You’re easy to read when you wear your heart on your sleeves, sweetheart.”
“..Hm.”
“Have you eaten?” When you shake your head, he frowns. “Come on, little one, you know better than that.”
“W-well, I…” When he speaks to you like that, it’s kind of hard to respond and you already know the flushed cheeks aren’t just from your cold. “Please don’t tell Namjoon. He gets really worked up.”
“And for good reason,” Seokjin says. “He’s just a little protective.”
“Why?”
“Well—”
What a dumb question. “Nevermind, you don’t have to say it,” you quickly cut the man off and hide yourself under the covers. Touching on the subject still leaves you flustered and unsure of how to deal with things. But still, running away from your problems isn’t exactly the right thing to do. And what if you hurt people’s feelings because of it? “You...um....are you mad?”
“Why would I be mad?”
“..Well…”
You don’t finish your sentence but he knows exactly what you mean and Seokjin chuckles lightly. “There’s no rush, Y/N. We don’t even expect you to reciprocate the feeling.”
“...You don’t?”
He shakes his head before remembering you’re still hidden under the covers and can’t see him. “Not at all.”
“Why not?” You ask, confused.
“That’s what love is, Y/N. You give your heart to someone without expecting anything back. There’s hope, sure, but if you really care for someone, nothing in the world would matter as long as they’re happy.”
Love.
As long as they’re happy.
You think you can understand it to some extent. You loved your mother and father, gave your heart to them without expecting anything back. Even though they trampled on it so many times, you were fine as long as you could do anything to make them happy.
You shake your head to rid of the thoughts.
No, that’s not a good example.
You think of Mister Butler, how kind he was, always giving you head pats and watching over you with care. You loved him and couldn’t care any less about how he felt in return. Though you were lucky he loved you back. The first person to ever do so.
Ah, but then again, this sort of love is different from the ones you have for Mister Butler and your parents. You can’t truly understand Seokjin, not yet, and it scares you knowing you may potentially be hurting them.
You don’t deserve this love.
Not at all.
.
.
.
“Jimin..?”
You hope it isn’t him hunched over beside the entrance, barely able to stand on his trembling feet, with his whole suit red with blood. But how can it not be him when that figure, his hand, the way he presents himself, and the sounds leaving his lips belong to him?
You’re quick to run over and reach for him and the instant you give him your support, his weight leans against you as a curse leaves his mouth.
“Jimin, I…” Blood. You can feel the blood on your hands and when you look over to find that it indeed belongs to him, fear is quick to take over. “Jimin, what happened?”
“Sorry,” he winces at the pain below his abdomen, “I’m going to need you for a moment,” he says as he lays his head on your shoulder and although you’re afraid, afraid of so many things, you allow him to lean on you while trying your best to hold it all together.
Jimin’s the one in danger, you can’t lose yourself just yet.
He’s fine.
He’s fine.
“Jimin!” You hear Jungkook’s voice who quickly runs over to help you support the man. “What happened?” He asks before quickly correcting himself. “Wait no, don’t speak. Let’s get you to the emergency room.”
“Jimin?”
A few more feet runs over, confusing and concern clear on their faces and before you realize it, Jimin no longer needs your support. You feel his weight transferred over to someone else and you stand there, completely frozen as the world moves in chaos.
It’s alright, the boys are here now.
They’ll take care of him.
He’ll be fine.
You have nothing to worry about.
“Y/N?” Amidst the panic, a gentle voice reaches your ear, and the room falls silent as Jimin looks over at you. “Hey, you.” You feel his cold hand against your cheek and a soft smile curls along his lips. But his eyes, his eyes are filled with worry over you despite the fact that he’s the one in pain. “Look at me, I’m blinking aren’t I? I’m breathing.”
Right.
He’s still blinking. He’s still breathing.
“I’ll be alright, Y/N, but I won’t get help until I know you understand that.” How cruel of him to put you over his bleeding body. When you squeeze your eyes shut and feel the tears rolling down your cheeks, you nod against his hand, words unable to form as you can feel a lump against your throat to prevent you from speaking. Jimin smiles. “Good girl.”
He pats you gently on the head before allowing the others to help him to the emergency room.
“Y/N.” You hear a commanding voice and look up to find Namjoon who had stayed behind with you. “Go wash up,” he orders, noting at the bloodstains on you.
Still in a daze and unable to process all of this at once, you give him a nod and begin to walk away as if in a trance.
“Hey.” You look back at him upon his call. “You’re shaking.”
“...Ah.”
“He’ll be fine.”
“I-I know, I just…” You wrap your trembling hands around you, hugging yourself. “I-I’ll be okay. You should catch up with the rest. You’re the boss, after all, Namjoon. You should...should uh, figure out what..what happened.”
“...Right.”
You leave him there standing alone.
.
.
.
The world is so cruel to you, you know, but you never expected to receive love, not after the only person who cared for you in your life had died as a result of their love. You never wanted to receive love after that incident. It took some time for you to realize that, not wanting the people around you to get hurt because of your mistakes.
Father says love is a weakness one should never carry. Because you can fix yourself when it comes to mistakes and weakness but love, love is a powerful thing that can leave you broken and hesitant before the enemy.
So it surprised you to find a powerful mafia boss, more powerful than your father, to lean onto love.
Namjoon doesn’t look like a man who will ever hesitate nor does he look like he cares about anyone in his life. Father said love makes you vulnerable and weak but Namjoon is a powerful man. So powerful the whole world might as well be afraid of him.
And you know because before you ever met him, his name alone frightened you and everyone else that’s heard of it.
Namjoon’s powerful despite love. Or rather, is it love that fuels him?
You’re scared, unsure of what to do, but Jimin’s incident leaves you wondering and hoping and suddenly you’re scared of another thing. Because what if you leave things be without ever giving in to the love and regret everything? What if you lose them before you can even confess the things that on are your mind?
But what if you do give yourself in and it leaves you hurting even more than you are now? What if you’re happy one moment and the next, you feel so broken it ruins everything that you’ve built?
Nothing lasts forever and you’re afraid.
They don’t know much about you but one day you know you’ll have to tell them the truth about everything. And if that day comes, will you be alright?
If you told them about the darkness inside of you, would they still look at you like you’re the sun?
You are anything but the sun yet the way they’ve always looked at you, the things they do, the things they say, this sort of love is something you want to hold onto. But is that selfish of you? To want love when you aren’t sure about your own feelings?
“I want it,” you say and each word you speak they listen well without degrading you one bit and sometimes you think this makes it worse. Their unforgiving kindness, their unwavering eyes, and the fact that they expect nothing in return. You never thought this would hurt more than being ignored and hated but it does. “I want it but I...I’m so afraid.”
In the infirmary room where Jimin has yet to heal, you say the things that are on your mind, hoping they can understand every word you say.
“What if one day you come to hate me and just...leave without an explanation? Or what if you get hurt because of me and what if you come to resent me one day? What happens then?”
“That’s what love is,” Seokjin says. “You go into it blindly, trusting the person you give your heart to.”
“But that’s so dangerous.”
Yoongi chuckles lightly. “It is but look where we are. We’re fine, aren’t we?”
You look around at where they surround you before meekly avoiding their gaze once more. “You’re...Mmn. You guys are doing fine but I...that’s because you’re kind and sweet and caring.”
“And you aren’t?” Taehyugn asks.
“I’m selfish.”
“How so?”
“I want this but I don’t even...I haven’t even...”
“That’s okay. We’ll wait for you.” You don’t even have to finish your sentence for them to understand you. And hearing how kind and gentle they are towards you, you only feel more guilty about the situation and quickly shake your head at Hoseok.
“But it isn’t okay. It’s wrong of me to make you wait. I...I’m scared.”
“What are you scared of?”
“Of falling, Namjoon,” you say as you look at him, eyes arching with pain because you want them to understand. “I’m scared of falling.”
“Then we’ll catch you.”
“...What?”
“We’ll catch you,” he says again and opens his arms for you. He smiles, gently, and your heart skips a beat at seeing this for the second time. Namjoon’s smile is pretty, just as it was the very first time you saw it, yet this one feels a little more special, a little more sweet, and filled with a little more love. Does he love you now? You aren’t sure, but for some reason, you aren’t afraid of the answer.
“Collapse into me. Just once, and I promise you’ll never have to fall again.”
Promise, he says, as if the word itself is that easy to keep.
But giving a promise to someone is dangerous. A promise means forever, a contract for one who swears to never break, and when that promise breaks, the person receiving that promise is on the losing end.
You’re on the losing end.
A tear rolls down your cheek but Namjoon’s right there to catch it for you. You blink, allowing more tears to flow, but the way he caresses your face with such gentle hands, it’s almost impossible for those tears to escape him.
They fall and fall but he catches them all and you’re afraid, you’re still afraid. But you want to trust in the promise he’s given unto you and in just mere moments, you allow yourself to collapse, to fall right into the arms that catches you so, just as he promised.
He catches you and holds you right there and you thank the heavens for allowing your stars to cross paths.
.
.
.
“Stop trying to pretend that you can magically make things all better just because you’ve lived a better life than I have.”
You know he doesn’t mean it. He doesn’t. He’s just a little bit angry and a little bit stressed. You’re fine, you’re fine, you don’t need to trust in these words that are leaving his lips.
“You’re useless when you try to help.”
Useless.
Utterly useless.
It may not mean much to him but to you, you can feel a knife stabbing you straight through the heart. It hurts, hurts so much, but when he doesn’t feel any remorse after saying such a thing, you can already feel the lump in your throat trying to keep you from speaking.
No, you tell yourself. You’re better than this and Namjoon...Namjoon just needs to cool his head down.
“Namjoon…”
He leaves the bed, irritated, and your heart sinks a little more at the cold shoulders he’s giving you. It hurts, it does, but you know you can’t let him be when he’s like this. You have to talk to him.
“Did you not hear what I just said? If you want to be useful, do that by getting out of my way. What use is a daughter of a mafia to me if she can’t even follow simple instructions?”
He was never this angry when you first met, never this cruel. Maybe in his heart he was but he always did his best to keep his cool and not let his emotions take over. So what’s wrong this time? Why is he speaking to you as if you are just some simple pawn for him? You’re not a pawn.
“Isn’t that what you are?”
As if your feelings doesn’t matter, as if you’re just some insignificant woman who walked into his life one day.
“Be a good little housewife and stop pestering me if you don’t want to piss me off even further.”
You feel the harsh wind against you when the door slams shut right in your face.
That was probably the last night you ever spoke to Namjoon. Before you decided to end it all.
.
.
.
“I know I told you I’d always come to you when I get scared but...promises are meant to be broken, aren’t they?” Hoseok lays on the bed sleeping peacefully and normally you wouldn’t have gotten such courage to speak your thoughts out loud but he’s taken some medicine so you know he won’t wake up any time soon.
It’s better this way.
“I’m sorry, Hoseok,” you say, a broken smile resting on your face before the feelings get too much and your tears take over. “I’m sorry I can’t come to you. I want to but I...who do I go to when you’re the one I’m also afraid of? What happens then?”
You hear how broken you are when your voice gets too high, when it breaks and falls quiet, and when your body does everything to keep you from holding on. It’s hard to hold on, to keep yourself steady when all you want to do is succumb to the darkness.
Promises are meant to be broken. Promises imply a forever but forever doesn’t exist.
Why did you ever think you were capable of living a happy life? You’ve been taught so much about the world, how broken it is, how cruel and selfish it is, yet you thought you could leave it all behind and hide behind your shields.
But when the shields break, you have nowhere left to go.
You’re left alone.
Lost and afraid.
Even though one last light shines its way towards you, it’s dim. So dim you’re afraid holding onto it will only break you even more.
Because holding onto a dimming light will only give you false hope and you can’t hope anymore. Not when he can shine brighter with his own lights. If he stays with you, you’ll only break the two of you and you know that if that ever happens, you will never forgive yourself.
So you decide to let Hoseok go.
“I’m sorry.”
The words repeat over and over again until you can no longer find your voice. You pray, you wish, that your words can reach his heart someday when he thinks of you, of the good times, of when you were enough and had made them happy.
You hope you made them happy.
If even a little.
.
.
.
May 20XX; Age Twenty-Three
Present.
“Fool.”
You flinch at the venom which spits from your father’s lip. You can’t meet his eyes, too afraid of them, but you know he’s staring down at you with such disappointment and disgust for the one daughter who couldn’t do anything right, not even when he gave you away to the mafia boss Kim Namjoon.
“You’ve always been useless from the second you were born,” he says, voice filled with loath. “For a moment I thought things were going well, finally made useful to me. But here you are, crawling right back and begging for forgiveness at the foot of your father. I told you to make yourself useful.”
“...” A disappointment. From the second you were born, no one wanted you. An unwanted child whose own parents hated her. Your mother hated you with all that she had and spent the rest of her dying days placing curses upon you for causing her suffering.
She never recovered from childbirth and you were to blame.
Your father never cared for your mother and certainly couldn’t care any less about you. But you were his heir, his only daughter, and so when you finally became of age, you were made a pawn in his game of chess pieces, exchanging you into the hands of Kim Namjoon so that he could gain power.
It was going well for some time.
But you messed it all up.
You swallow thickly, praying your voice will not come off weak because you know your father hates that more than anything. “Mr. Kim and I made a contract, father,” you tell him slowly, not wanting to piss him off even further. “You will be allowed to keep your power as long as the gangs do not cross paths. And as long as I keep my silence for anything that has to do with their gang. No war shall be ignited.”
You hand the contract to his assistant, who hands it over to him.
It’s silent for a while as you keep quiet while he reads the content of the contract. You remember the moment well, left alone with Namjoon for the last time as the two of you made the agreement for your father to keep his power and for you to keep your silence.
A contract that sealed your fate upon never crossing paths with him ever again.
You can still feel the pain so well, hurting, aching, but you know better than anyone that allowing yourself to show weakness before your father is a death sentence.
“Leave,” your father utters when he throws the paper back at you. This means he accepts the contract and although he’s disappointed in you, at least you had done one thing right in letting him keep his power.
He doesn’t care that his daughter was hurt by the very man he gave her away to. He doesn’t care one bit.
Just for power.
You lower your head his way with respect still, take the paper from the floor, and walk out the door.
Namjoon never knew your life behind these closed doors, he always thought you were raised preciously.
Some life filled with rainbows and sunshine.
You want to scoff.
They were all just illusions you made him believe.
Maybe if you had told him, he would have loved you a little more. But can you really use your sad past just for a crumb of love? You’ve become that desperate, haven’t you?
But it’s too late now because you’ve already decided to sever ties with them all, Hoseok included even though he showed you that he still had love for you. But you’ve become too afraid to stay, afraid that one day his love for you will wither as well.
So it’s better to leave before you have to witness that right before your eyes as well.
You’re a worthless being not meant for anyone to love.
When you return to the room you haven’t seen in such a long, long while, everything feels empty and for a moment you think you’re becoming numb to the pain.
Until you feel a tear fall from your eye. When that falls, the rest of them, which had been holding on, begin to follow along until you can no longer see what is before you.
The room is dark, empty and cold, and when your knees weaken below you, you find yourself falling down and hugging yourself. The warmth isn’t enough, it will never be enough. But it’s far too late to seek for their warmth.
Not that they would have given it to you in the first place.
Perhaps Hoseok would have but you’re afraid.
You’re so, so afraid.
Because you know that as time will inevitably pass, his love will break as well.
And so you’re left alone to just yourself, just as it was from the very beginning. Nothing has changed and your heart shatters into tiny pieces, impossible to ever return to its original shape.
They healed you, and they’ve broken you.
1K notes · View notes
ggukkieland · 3 months ago
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📚BTS Fic Reads - 2021 Aug Pt. 2
I enjoyed last month’s reading list 🥰. Variety of themes from genies to superheroes to hybrids to doctors to slice of life. I also think I said and commented a lot on each fic because I couldn’t help express how I feel 💖
Kudos to these authors for making my exhausting Aug a bearable one 🥰
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🌷 Aug 2021 Fic Reads Part 1:  Ongoing Series
all members
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🥕 [Completed Fics/Series]
Tip: If link doesn’t work, click on author and go to their masterlist S - smut | F - fluff | A - angst
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After Rain @rmverse - one shot | 12.8k | kind of supernatural, patient!namjoon x patient!reader, hurt/comfort, strangers to lovers, lucid dreams at one point | f, s, slight a
Are You Allowed to Tell God to Suck It + Blossom  @min-youngis​ - two shot | 3.7k | Angel AU, Angel!Reader, Human!Namjoon, CEO Namjoon, sort of established relationship, some philosophical talks | f
Competitive @jjksblackgf​ - drabble | 1k | enemies to lovers, college au (grad school?), rivalry turned sexy thanks to one hot namjoon | f
Hit the Back @ironicarmy (deactivated) - one shot | 6.6k | fratboy au, stem major!reader, college au, car wash au, summer au, friends to lovers | s, slight f (no updates yet if author will re-post but will put this here in case it gets posted again)
Hourglass @joonbird​ - drabble | 750 wc | strangers to lovers, strangers on a train | s
Inner Universe @donewithjeon​ - one shot | 6.9k | College AU, disability themes | a, f
Rental Series @moononthejoon (deactivated but on AO3) - one shot + drabble series | 30.9k | Fake Dating? (more of Rent a Boyfriend), Psychologist!Namjoon, Rental Drabble: Established Relationship, Boyfriend AU, Husband AU, Parenting AU | s, f, a (linked the AO3 in my reblog)
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29 + 1 @taeescript​ - series [3/3] | 21.9k | CEO!Seokjin, Seokin is the devil from The Devil Wears Prada (he was really mean T_T), slice of life, enemies to lovers, intern!oc, date/companion oc to gala (not really fake dating but seokjin needs her to help his image) | a, s, f
Code Blue @saladejin​ - one shot | 4.5k | doctor!seokjin x nurse!reader, hospital au, humor, lots of teasing | f
Exes and Superher-O’s @kpopfanfictrash - two shot | 59k | Superhero AU, Enemies to Lovers AU, Action, Exes AU, eventually Boyfriend AU (Part 2) | a, f, s
Gold Embers Touch the Blue Veil @magicalsalamander​ - one shot | 19.5k | Avatar AU, Fire Bender!Seokjin, Water Bender!OC, Enemies to Lovers, Military AU, Warrior!OC | a, s
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.Docx @yngpraisebot​ - one shot | 4.4k | CEO!Yoongi, dom themes, harassment themes (proceed with caution) | s
“Are You Flirting With Me” @rmverse - drabble | 1k? | barista!reader, prompt: “Are you flirting with me?” / “You finally noticed?” | f
2am @sunshinejoon​ - series [4/4] | 5.7k | established relationship, semi-break up au, she thinks he’s fooling around (?) | a
A Scam Marriage @xotoosweet​ - one shot | 4k | arranged marriage (marriage of convenience), grad school au, architecture major!yoongi, psychology!oc, college au, friends to lovers, some unrequited pining | f  
Breakfast in Bed @joonbird - one shot | 12k | IKEA Employee!Yoongi, bed display crasher OC, strangers to lovers, crack/humor, retail AU | s, f (really hot and yet tooth rotting fluff)
Helping Out @itsallabouthedetails​ - one shot | 2.5k | OC is Jin’s roommate, but Yoongi helping her with cramps | s
Mortalised @minyfic​ - one shot | 5.5k | dilf!yoongi, single dad au, bestfriend au, they live apart but Yoongi visited OC, a proposition… | s, f
Not Around @minyfic - one shot | 19.8k | best friend’s boyfriend, basketball player!yoongi x cheerleader!oc, college au | a, f, s
Off the Deep End @boymeetsweevil​ - one shot | 17.5k | kind of sci-fi?, mermaid!yoongi, fwb au, slice of life-ish | s, a, slight f
Petrichor @donewithjeon - one shot | 10k | barista!reader, coffee shop au, yoongi is not the type who stays | a, s
Post-it Note @couture-kookie​ - one shot | 6k | Neighbor AU, Enemies to Lovers, that turned sort of BDSM | s
Snake Kisses @peekaboongi​ - one shot | 8.5k | Hybrid AU, Snake Hybrid Yoongi, fluffy ending | s, f  
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Absolution @junghelioseok​ - one shot | 21.9k | action, secret agent au, secret identity themes, part of the crosshairs/budapest universe | s 🌷
Angsty Divorced Parents drabble @ughcore - drabble | 700 wc | exes au, infidelity themes, parents au | a 🌷
Golden Hour @snackhobi - drabble  | 2.6k | sfw, magic au | f
I Don’t Know What to Call This @httphopewrld​ - one shot | 16.4k | idol!hoseok, friends to lovers, sort of fwb au | s, a, f
Remember Me Not @taeescript - one shot | 14.5k | genie!hoseok, fantasy au, sort of star crossed lovers, bestfriend au, memory-alter themes, sort of reincarnation too? | a, f 🌷
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Blazing Arrows @kingminie​ - series [7/7] | 35.3k | Unrequited Love (for Jungkook). Love Triangle themes, Cupid!Jimin, kind of Roommate!Jimin too | f, a (wasn’t expecting this to be angsty T_T)
Spring Leaves @alilbihh​ - one shot | 11.5k | witch!jimin, witch!reader, arranged marriage au, kind of slice of life but world is more on fantasy, slow burn | f (tooth-rotting fluff 🥰)  
The Call to You @1lyhobi​ - one shot | 2k | werewolf au, alpha!reader, mating themes | s
You Have (1) New Voicemail @coepiteamare​ - one shot | 4.9k | epistolary (all through voicemail), mystery (because we don’t know where Jimin is), sort of falling out? | a (perfect angst) 🌷
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A Crow Without Wings @kissmetae​ - one shot | 5.8k | demon!taehyung (the sweetest demon), but dark scenario (must be in soul form for them to be together) | s, a
Apartment 512 + About the Boy @moononthejoon (deactivated, but on AO3) - one shot + drabble series | 41.3k | neighbor au, fwb au, sort of enemies to lovers, college au (originally), tattooed!taehyung, eventually boyfriend AU, husband AU, post-grad AU | f, s, a
Can’t Flaunt What’s Not Yours @turtletaemin​ - one shot | 6k | FWB AU, OC nonchalant about their fuckbuddy situation but got jealous (and bitchy) | s, a, f  
Corruption @95boysbe - one shot | 2.5k | established relationship, boyfriend!taehyung loves corrupting OC | s, slight f
Fantasies @anoddkpopfan​ - one shot | 2.7k | dom!taehyung, college au, gaming buddy!Taehyung | s
Friends @hobistagram​ - drabble | 1.7k | best friend au, idol au, oc suddenly revealed she had a crush on him before | f
Good Luck Charm @gukyi​ - one shot | 11k | Bestfriend AU, Unrequited AU (for OC), Roommate AU, Actor!Taehyung | f, a
Letters @bangtanocean​ - series [3/3] | 10.3k | historical au, soulmate au, feat Prince!Yoongi, chef!oc, soldier!taehyung (commander), war themes?, heavy angst | s, f, a
North Star @kainks - drabble | 1.8k | god AU, Fantasy AU, Christmas AU, Soulmate AU, Reincarnation AU | f
Once Upon a Boy @eternally-writing​ - drabble | 2.8k | rich!taehyung, strangers to lovers, Cinderella AU | f, a
One Last Time @softjaehyvn​ - one shot | 3.6k | actor!taehyung x actress!reader, break up au, co-worker au | a, f
Pluto Protector @kitsutaes - drabble | 2.6k | childhood friends, bestfriend AU, artist!taehyung, astrophysicist!reader | f
Poetry of the Stars @jjiimin​ - one shot | 25.4k | hurt/comfort, enemies to lovers, best friend’s brother, heavy themes (please check tags) | f, a
SPH @venusjeon​ - drabble | 2.2k | FWB AU, humor, SPH stands for ‘small penis humiliation’ 😂, bad parent themes but taehyung is such a sweetheart to make your world better | s, a, f  
When a Ladybug Meets a Spider @gxtsmxt-blog​ - one shot | 14.1k | College AU, Tarantula Owner!Taehyung, Dorm mate!OC, humor (really cute and quirky) | a, f, s  🌷
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↬ One-shots | Drabbles
12:49 PM @likeastarstar​ - drabble | 424 wc | bad boy!jungkook (or so it seems because people are judgers), a little plot twist on characters (who goes soft for wildflowers? who rides the bike?) | f 🌷
Apodyopsis @jeonsjiddies​ - one shot | 12k | Nude Model!Jungkook, Artist!OC, strangers to lovers, Kookie has a sad backstory but he’ll give you whiplash with his triplicity (boy with a story that makes me sad, cocky/flirty, feral!jk - take your pick) | s 🌷
Autumn: My Old Story @thedefinitionofbts​ - one shot | 9.5k | Werewolf AU, supernatural au, sort of childhood friends  | a (beautifully written angst) 🌷
Bunny @btssmutgalore​ - one shot | 17.5k | friends to lovers, shy!jungkook, camboy au, secret identity | s 🌷
Cheer @btssaysstudy​ - one shot | 9.9k | cheerleader!oc, athlete!jungkook, rugby, college au | f
Combative @smasmashin​ - one shot (with ongoing drabbles) | 6.2k | Fuck or Die AU, Assassin AU, kinda alien too? (feat Alien!Seokjin), Enemies to Lovers, Crack/Humor | S (pwp) 🌷
Fighter @eureka-its-zico​ - one shot | 4.8k | strangers to lovers, tsundere!jungkook, bartender!oc, bar AU, ex-fighter!jungkook, protective!jungkook *yes yes* | s, a 🌷
Green Room @honeymoonjin​ - drabble | 1.8k | idol au, jealous!jungkook, exhibitionist (because he’s so jealous of Hoseok 😁) | s 🌷
Hot Ones @yoon-kooks​ - one shot | 5.1k | FWB AU, Co-worker AU, idol!jungkook, sort of Bet AU (over array of deadly hot sauce samples) | f 🌷
Illusions of Choice @hobibliophile​ - one shot | 7.3k | heir au, arranged marriage au, supposedly arranged with the older brother but got arranged with jungkook instead after brother’s death | a, f, s
I Think I’m in Love With You and I’m Terrified @cupofteaguk - drabble | 1.9k | fake dating au, unrequited love for Kookie because he couldn’t say how he feels | f 🌷
I Want You @moonlightchildz​ - one shot | 13k | slow burn, strangers to lovers, eventual friends, virgin!reader (and only wants Jungkook) | s, f  🌷
Just For Tonight @jungkxook​ - one shot | 17.7k | strangers to lovers, dare au (inspired by the film Nerve), party au | s, f 🌷
Kinky Hours Drabble: Single Dad!JK and Babysitter!OC @lavishedinjimin - drabble | 1k | Nanny!OC, DILF!Jungkook, single dad au who is also sexually frustrated, age gap (consenting adults) | s 🔥 🌷
Koopid @gwoongi​ - one shot | 4.7k | feat. Namjoon (viewer), porn stars Jungkook and OC, established relationship, all the acts are seen through Namjoon’s viewing experience | s, kind of f 🌷
Losing Game @kookaine​ - drabble | 988 wc | villain!jungkook, dystopian, apocalypse | a (heavy)
Morning After @jmnjmnjmn​ - drabble | 1k | one night stand AU, friends to lovers, really cute | f 🌷
Mr. & Mrs. Jeon @taetaesbaebaepsae​ - one shot | 7.1k | assassin au, husband au, secret identities, Mr. and Mrs. Smith adaptation | a, f, s
Nothing Compares 2U + Since U Been Gone @burberryplaid - drabble | 790 wc | idol au, breakup au, themes of cheating (someone is rumored with jk) | a
One on One @thatmultifandomhoe​ - one shot | 3.1k | College AU, Sports AU, Boxer AU | f (really cute) 🌷
Pearls and Pastries @masterninjacow​ - one shot | 3.6k | baker!reader, pirate!jungkook, fantasy, pining, medieval au | f, a
Philtatos @sweetbunnykook​ - drabble | 2.1k | god AU, hades’ son!Jungkook, soulmate AU, established relationship 🌷
Quarter Life Crisis @heungtanbts - one shot | 25k | slow burn, bestfriend AU, idiots to lovers, OC experiencing quarter life crisis and they think the solution is for her to get a boyfriend, some angst from one silent bunny | a, f, implied s 🌷
Revenge is Brutally Sweet @yumeyooa​ - one shot | 14.6k | guitarist!jungkook, vocalist!reader, band au, high school au, post break up au, exes au | a, slight f
Sacrifices @jiminiethot - one shot | 4.4k | Gamer!Jungkook, Parenting AU, Husband AU, Unplanned pregnancy, really sweet and was part of my established rel fic rec list for jungkook | f, s 🌷
Sleeposal @joyfulhopelox​ - drabble | 2.8k | boyfriend AU, sleep talker!jungkook proposing in his sleep, really cute!, proposal AU | f 🌷
Snaps @cryxtal-moon​ - one shot | 10.3k | photographer!jungkook, assistant!oc, neighbor au, producer!oc | f (really cute)
Somebody That I Used to Know @imyourhobiii​ - one shot | 9.7k | childhood best friends, roommate au, fwb au, waterpark au, falling out type of fic, really angsty | a, s
Still With You @kooktrash​ - one shot | 4k? | Strangers to Lovers, summer romance type, sort of Exes (but not really because they weren’t officially together) | a, s, f 🌷
The Art of Cheating @justcallmenikki7 - one shot | 1.3k | soulmate au, soulmate marks (they see what is written on their skin except name, phone number, address) | f
The Big Cats @breakiebunny​ - one shot | 10.5k | Mafia AU, Hybrid AU, Amur Leopard!Jungkook,  enemies to lovers, last amur leopard hybrids alive (they need to mate) | a, s
The Cheetah Lounge @kookiecrumb​ - one shot | 2.3k | Kookie just got fired, OC is the girl he sees on the subway on his way to work every day, party/club setting | s, slight f
The Lighthouse @rubycoast​ - one shot | 12k | strangers to lovers, pining, tsundere!jungkook in the beginning, friends to lovers, kind of supernatural, plot twist | a, f  🌷
The Lines Between Us @chateautae​ - one shot | 10k | detective!jungkook, enemies to lovers, slight fantasy, FWB AU, coworker au,  | s, a 🌷
The Pool Boy @idolimagines - one shot | 8.1k | pool boy!jungkook, executive!OC, recently divorced OC, hired employee!jungkook, noona cougar vibes | s, f 🌷
This Time Around @alternateafterthought​ - one shot | 22k | strangers to lovers, hybrid au, both of them are rare snow leopard hybrids, forced to breed (rare hybrid type), kind of action (? when they were trying to escape), OT7 | a, s, f 🌷
Trick @blkjmn​ - one shot | 4.4k | Piercer!Jungkook, tattoo artist AU, OC getting a clit piercing | s 🌷
True Damage @krreader - drabble | 1.3k | idol!reader, rivals on the outside but friends but JK messed up | a
War of Hormones @babiekaykes​ - one shot | 5.6k | Werewolf!Jungkook, supernatural, Established Relationship, Boyfriend AU, Alpha!Jungkook who is scared of touching OC (afraid of hurting her and this is the point of the story because OC is ready to take their relationship to the next level) | s, f 🌷
You @breakiebunny - one shot | 10.7k | childhood bestfriend, former fling, idol!jungkook, OC in a relationship (but abusive one), protective!koo | a, f, s
Your Every Wish is my Command @jeonggukingdom​ - one shot | 13.6k | genie!jungkook, fantasy (a bit), sort of star-crossed? (not sure how a genie and human can end up together and that made me sad a bit) | s, f, a 🌷
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↬ Two-shots | Series
50% Cotton + 50% Polyester @perpetually-jungshook - two shot | 11.8k | Shy!Jungkook, virgin!jungkook, College AU, friends to lovers | f, s 🌷
All The Times You Knocked @taehyung-the-baehyung​ - drabble series [5/?] | 5k+ | neighbor au, slice of life, strangers to lovers | f, a (I don’t think it’ll be completed but it’s a good read ^_^) 🌷
Glitter and Disquiet @joheunsaram​ - two shot | 36k | heir au, ceo au, youtuber!oc, virgin!jungkook, gaming company, post grad au, enemies to lovers | a, f, s
Hiraeth @darlingwoes - series [15/15] | 54k | Royalty AU, Time Travel AU, Fantasy, Slow Burn, sort of starcrossed | f, s, a 🌷
Hot Summer @httphopewrld - two shot | 15.4k | Jungkook is the boy across the street, tattoo artist!jungkook, voyeurism (? OC could see JK and his ex-gf across), eventual established relationship, angst due to OC not admitting about seeing him through his window | s, a, f
Irrevocably Yours, Part 2 @eureka-its-zico - series [2/3] | 29.2k+ | Enemies to Lovers, slow burn, Rich!Jungkook but now adjusting to his situation, disability themes (jk had an accident which now affected his leg), hurt/comfort,, First Love type of fic, really cute | f, a 🌷
(also I realized this is not completed yet but it’s doesn’t have that cliffhanger-ish type of plot so you can still read and feel satisfied with how things ended so far)
Payback @thatsabae​ - series [12/12] | 21.8k | strangers to lovers, their partners are cheating on them, revenge au, comedy, friends to lovers | a, f
Somewhere Only We Know (Final) @qersona​ - series [4/4] | 21k | Hybrid AU, FWB AU, childhood friends au, enemies to lovers, college AU, unrequited (for OC), sports (JK) | s, a, f (this was part of my Aug 2020 reading list so we’ve come a full circle here 🥰) 🌷
Sweet Like Sugar @defsoulstation​ - series [3/3] | 4.5k | Werewolf AU, Noona!OC, a/b/o dynamics but OC is human, Jungkook is like one big puppy who likes Noona who gives him food 🥺(but went feral during his heat) | a, f 🌷
They Were Liars @kooktrash - series [8/8] | 23k | College AU, Neighbor AU, Fake Dating AU, sort of FWB AU, OC recently broke up with hoseok (caught him cheating) and concocted a “fake dating” plan with the neighbor | s, a, f
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The Switch @kookingtae​ - one shot | 9k | Established Relationship (Hoseok), Christmas AU, Poly AU, fantasy I guess? (members can switch during sex so she gets to try them all in different stages of smut *wink wink*) | s, f 🌷
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posted: 2021 Sep 04
link to other reading lists
other fic rec lists (by theme)
I love to read so feel free to message me about fics! 🌷
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1K notes · View notes
angelicyoongie · 3 months ago
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Abundance (XVII)
— summary: You never expected that you would end up adopting a hybrid, and if someone had told you that you would end up with seven? Well, you would have thought they were crazy. But here you are, with three different packs of hybrids that don't get along – but all want to stay with you. Yeah, it turns out crazy is an understatement.
— pairing: hybrid bts x human f!reader
— genre: fluff, angst, smut
— warnings/content: explicit sexual content! unprotected sex, oral (m/f receiving), breast play, fingering (f), knotting, seokjin has a big dick™️, slight dom!seokjin vibes (but not really any sub!reader/sub!jk), edging, breeding kink, there’s probably some spelling mistakes but just pretend u do not see them, i’m tired sjdks
— word count: 6.5k
— tag list: here (the tag list is closed/full!)
Part: I / II / III / IV / V / VI / VII / VIII / IX / X / XI / Find more chapters here!
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You let out a content noise as you feel soft lips moving across your face; gentle kisses being pressed slowly into your skin. Your eyes flutter open to find Seokjin hovering over you, the hamster hybrid giving your mouth a chaste peck as he murmurs out a low, “Good morning.”
“Morning,” You whisper, wincing as you push yourself up. God, you don’t think you’ve ever been this sore before, your muscles burning even with just a slight strain. Jeongguk grumbles under his breath at the movement, ears twitching as he rolls over to Seokjin’s side of the bed. The bunny hybrid nuzzles his face into his alpha’s pillow, the soothing scent quickly lulling him back to sleep.
“How do you feel?” Seokjin cups your cheek, his dark eyes trailing shamelessly along the blooming marks on your exposed skin.
“Sore,” You grimace as you roll your shoulders to shake out some of the tension, the motion pulling at the tender skin.
Seokjin’s touch slides from your cheek down to your neck, the light pressure of his fingertips making you shiver as he brushes against the bruises on your throat. The hamster hybrid swallows thickly, a slight flush in his cheeks as he says, ”If it’s too much you can always tap out, Y/n.”
You shake your head, pressing a soft kiss to Seokjin’s palm, ”It’s not that bad, I’m okay. I’ll let you know if it gets too intense.” Maybe the soreness is a little bad, but not enough for you to miss out on Seokjin’s rut, and definitely not enough for him to worry over.
Seokjin hums, pleased, as he runs his fingers along your neck. Your throat runs dry as the duvet shifts, the hamster hybrid’s hard cock being revealed as he reaches past you to grab something from the bedside table. It bobs against his stomach as he moves, the head a deep pink and already dripping, smearing precum against his skin whenever it touches his body. He’s so big and thick, and the prominent vein on the underside of his cock is practically calling out for your tongue.
Your thighs clench at the sight, the familiar tug of heat reigniting in the pit of your stomach. Clutching the duvet close to your chest, you reach out with one hand, more than ready to help Seokjin release some tension. The hamster hybrid looks too awake to have just rolled out of bed, and you hate the idea of him waiting and being in pain just because he didn’t want to disturb you or Jeongguk.
“Huh?” You blink as a plate of food is placed in your outstretched hand, your fingers just an inch away from grazing Seokjin’s length. You look up in confusion as he pushes the plate into your lap, handing you a fork to make the prepared eggs and toast easier to eat.
“You don’t want help?” You ask, eyes wide with puzzlement as your fingers hesitate over the plate.
“Not yet, petal, finish your food first,” Seokjin nudges your arm, a poorly contained smirk tugging at his lips at your eagerness to touch him. You duck your head as you register the pet name, quickly shoving a large piece of toast into your mouth to keep yourself from grinning like an idiot. You chew quickly, nearly choking on your food as the hamster hybrid suddenly leans back, his toned body on display as he wraps a loose fist around his cock. You pause, gaze drawn to the way he lazily jerks himself off, fingers barely providing any pressure as they glide up and down his shaft. Seokjin looks unaffected despite the clear tension in his body, his muscles straining against the slow pace.
“Keep going, Y/n.” Seokjin’s eyebrow quirks as he notices your wavering attention, making your parted lips snap shut. You swallow harshly at the sight, your throat too dry to make the toast go down smoothly. You reach blindly for the bottle of water you left on the bedside table last night, gulping down a few mouthfuls as the hamster hybrid’s eyes flutter. You race through eating the food on your plate, barely tasting it. The dessert right in front of you looking a little too inviting to hold off for much longer.
Jeongguk makes a tiny noise as you shift to put the empty plate away, the bunny hybrid burrowing deeper into the sheets. Seokjin startles you by grabbing it out of your hands as you turn to look at Jeongguk, muttering out a quiet, “I’m just going to leave it by the door. Less chance of something getting broken.”
You nod, heat flooding your stomach at the implication. You smooth your fingers over the mess of hair that’s sticking out from the duvet, Jeongguk’s long ears twitching at the touch. You smile fondly, knowing it’s not enough to wake him up. You’ve come to realize over the last weeks of near daily midnight visits that he’s a very heavy sleeper, and you normally have to shake him to get him to semi-consciousness.
Your attention drifts back to Seokjin as he moves across the room, your eyes unabashedly drinking him in. You spot a few marks littering the back of his shoulders and neck, Jeongguk no doubt the culprit behind them. Your gaze slowly moves down his body, the broad shoulders and smaller waist looking honeyed in the warm morning light. You bite down harshly on your lips, stifling a whine, as you finally get to enjoy the un-obscured sight of Seokjin’s firm ass as he walks over to the door. Even his thighs are perfectly toned and–
You pause.
Why does it feel like there’s something you’re missing?
You quickly scan his body; working from his heels all the way back up to his head. You catch the small movement in his hair as he picks up a sound outside of the door, Seokjin's ears twitching as he tries to locate it. You stare at the soft brown fur, mind running at full speed, before your gaze hastily flickers down to his lower back. There should be something there, a tail, a nub, anything – but there’s nothing. Seokjin’s body is smooth, no other hybrid features in sight except for his ears.
“Seokjin?” You mumble, the growing arousal in your stomach fizzling out as it’s overtaken by concern, ”You don’t have a tail?”
Seokjin stiffens, the muscles in his back tensing as he freezes by the door. There’s a slight tremble in his hands as he leaves the plate on the nearby dresser, his voice tight as he says, ”I don’t.”
“It’s ... a genetic mutation – a disorder. That’s why I’m so tall for my species, and why Jeongguk is so much bigger than normal bunny hybrids. We’re both affected by a mutation in our hybrid genes that hasn’t been studied much. We’re often hidden away and forgotten about, not worth the money of figuring out why we’re so different when there’s hundreds of other hybrids out there that are perfect.”
You suck in a breath, chest aching at how hollow the hamster hybrid sounds. Seokjin stares at the wall, fingers balled into loose fists as he continues, ”I got the short end of the genetic pool, I guess. Gguk is a just a little too big, but I don’t even have half of what I should have. I’m not a real human, and I’m not a real hybrid.”  
Seokjin releases a short breath, broad shoulders slumping as he slightly turns his head. The hamster hybrid's profile is unreadable as he asks, ”Why? Does it bother you?”
“No,” You say, voice firm as you rid yourself of the duvet, moving down the bed. You rest on your knees at the edge, hand hovering just above your thigh, unsure if you should reach out to touch him.
”It doesn’t bother me or affect the way I see you at all. You’re you, and that’s all that matters, Seokjin. You’re stunning, and a lack of a tail doesn’t take anything away from your value as a person. I just wanted to make sure that you’re okay, that it’s not something we should’ve been checking up on or that it affects your body negatively.”  
The hamster hybrid shakes his head, ”It’s more cosmetic than anything else, it’s nothing you need to worry about. Thank you though, for .. everything.”
He turns around, a slow smile spreading across his lips as he sees how concerned you look. Seokjin looks relieved as he steps closer to the bed, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of your head. You rest your hand on his hip, running your fingers comfortingly across his skin as he releases a short puff of air. You make a questioning noise as you look up at him, Seokjin ears a faint red as he snorts and says, ”I just can’t believe we’re having this conversation while I’m hard.”  
Your eyes inadvertently flicker down, heat creeping back into your skin at how your fingers itch to move from his hips to his dripping cock.
”Y/n?” You force your attention back to Seokjin’s face, the hamster hybrid cupping your cheek as he says, ”You’re still sure you want to keep going?”
“Yes. Please,” You can’t keep the soft whine out of your voice.
Seokjin’s eyes darken, his fingers slipping from your cheek down to your jaw. He rests his thumb against your lower lip, gaze burning as he says, ”Open up then, petal.”
You let your lips part easily, allowing Seokjin to slide his thumb into your mouth. You meet him halfway, hollowing your cheeks around his finger as he presses down on your tongue. You keep your eyes locked with his as you swirl your tongue around the digit, sucking on the warm skin. Seokjin’s breathes out a low groan as you pull back on his thumb, leaving only the tip of his finger inside of your mouth before you bob down on it again. The sight makes Seokjin’s cock twitch, precum leaking down his shaft as he watches you intently.
He lets you wrap your tongue around his thumb one last time before he drags it away, voice raspy as he says, ”Good girl. You think you can take something bigger?”
Your cheeks are burning as you nod in agreement; the words making a steady ache build between your thighs. Seokjin steps closer, cock at the perfect height as you shuffle back to get on your hands and knees. You take him in your hand first, marvelling at the size and girth as you wrap your fingers around him. You slowly drag your fist up his length, the slide slick from the hamster hybrid’s precum. Seokjin moans as you tighten your grip, cock pulsing in your hands as you give him a few pumps. You’re too curious, too desperate to finally have him in your mouth to drag it out for much longer, and so you slide your hand down to the base of his cock, holding him still as you lower your head. You lick your lips at how Seokjin twitches in your hand as your breath washes over the head of his cock, sucking in a deep breath before you take him into your mouth.
“That’s it, petal,” Seokjin rasps as you part your lips around him, letting the head sink into your hot mouth. You suckle on it, swirling your tongue around the crown as you place a hand on Seokjin’s thigh to keep your balance. The hamster hybrid’s stomach tenses as you begin to lower your head down his length, bobbing up and down on the slick shaft. You can taste Seokjin’s precum as you drag your tongue along the prominent vein on his cock, the slightly salty taste making your core throb with want. Your mind is growing a little fuzzy from the lack of air and Seokjin's breathy moans, the hamster hybrid keeping his hips perfectly still as he lets you work his cock at your own pace.
“You’re doing so well, Y/n,” Seokjin murmurs, brushing away a few locks of hair that have fallen into your face. He keeps his hand on the side of your head, soft pants filling the air as he keep his eyes locked onto your face. The praise and gentle touches makes the heat pooling in your stomach grow more intense, your own whine muffled by his cock as you dig your fingers into the hard muscle beneath your hand. Your eyes flicker up to meet Seokjin’s, sucking in a deep breath through your nose as you let your throat relax, watching him intently as you swallow down his length.
“Fuck,” He curses, letting out a shuddering moan as his cockhead hits the back of your throat, ”you look so good.”
You ignore the spit running down your chin as you pull back, hollowing your cheeks as you try to make the sensation feel a tight as possible. You can feel Seokjin’s cock throb on your tongue, the head leaking as you swallow him down once again. You let his length slide down your throat, not stopping until you gag, throat constricting around the hard cock in your mouth.
“Gentle, petal” Seokjin’s instructs through his moan, voice strained as you bob your head up and down.
You’re ready to take him in all the way again as you realize he’s getting close, his breath quickening and cock twitching. But before you can, Seokjin carefully pulls you back, easing his length out of your mouth. He lets the tip rest against your swollen lips, releasing a deep groan as you stare up at him, waiting patiently.
“Don’t you want to come?” Seokjin’s eyes flutter as your mouth moves against his cock, your soft lips driving him insane as they brush across the sensitive skin.
“Not yet,” He breathes, shaking his head as he takes a step back. Your breath hitches as you meet Seokjin’s heated gaze, the hamster hybrid running a finger along your jaw before he leans in and murmurs, ”Move up on the bed, petal. Let me make you feel good first.”
You shiver, easily complying as you scoot back to make room for him. You end up near your pillow, back pressed to the sheets as the hamster hybrid crawls on top of you. You barely have time to blink before Seokjin dives down to capture your lips, hungry and eager. You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him closer as you card your fingers through his hair. You release a soft moan as he bites down on your bottom lip, parting your mouth just enough to grant him access to deepen the kiss, his tongue venturing past your lips to lick inside. You don’t think you would be able to tell up from down if someone asked, Seokjin’s passionate kisses turning your brain to mush as he lightly sucks on your tongue.
It’s only when your lungs are aching for air that you gently tug Seokjin back, the hamster hybrid making a displeased sound as he’s forced to move his lips elsewhere. You release a shaky breath as he latches on to the side of your throat, teeth nipping at your skin as he makes his own marks, decorating the space next to Jeongguk’s. Your legs fall apart as Seokjin begins moving down your body, the press of his lips turning softer and slower as he works his way down your torso. You release his hair in favour of grabbing a hold of the sheets as Seokjin teasingly scrapes his teeth just above your belly button, grounding yourself in the fabric as your cunt throbs with want.
You let out a soft gasp as Seokjin kisses the juncture of your hip, easing both of your thighs up to rest on his shoulders, his face right in front of your core.
”Look at you,” Seokjin hums, moving his pink lips to suck a faint mark to the sensitive inside of your thigh. His hands tighten around your legs as you startle from the feeling, his heated gaze staring straight at you as he says, ”You’re soaked, petal. Is this all for me?”
You flush, heat creeping into your cheeks as keep yourself balanced on your elbows, looking back at him. The words waiting on the tip of your tongue die out in favour of a loud moan as Seokjin suddenly leans down and envelops your clit in his mouth, sucking hard. The hamster hybrid doesn’t waste any time now that he’s finally at the place where your scent is the strongest, his ears twitching as he commits all the pretty sounds you make to memory. You grip the sheets as Seokjin licks between your folds, his skilled tongue dipping into your entrance before he moves back up to circle your clit. You’re dripping wet and needy, but the hamster hybrid seems content with teasing you, his tongue never staying in one place for too long as he laps up your arousal.
“S-seokjin,” You whine desperately, ”Please touch me – please.”
He groans against your cunt as you stutter out his name, his chin glistening as he pulls back to say, ”You want something more, Y/n?”
“Please,” You beg, lifting your hips the small inch that Seokjin’s hold on you allows, eager for any kind of friction you can get.
“Of course, petal, anything you want,” Seokjin growls, releasing his grip on your thigh to bring his hand to your aching core. He easily slips two fingers inside, watching your expression carefully despite your wet cunt practically sucking him in.
”You’re so beautiful, you take it so well,” Seokjin praises as he shifts his gaze down to your folds, catching a glimpse of your inviting heat as he spreads his fingers to prepare you for more.
You bite down on your lip to muffle your cries as Seokjin pumps in and out, the stretch and the fast pace making your thighs tremble. You’re so turned on you feel like you’re burning up, ready to explode as the hamster hybrid crooks his fingers deep inside of you, brushing over your g-spot. You barely notice the rustle in the sheets next to you, too caught up in the mounting pleasure in your core. You don’t even question it as someone tilts you head to the side, a pair of lips attaching themselves to the bruised skin on your throat, fingers ghosting over your flushed chest. God, you’re so close, almost there –
You whine loudly as Seokjin suddenly stops. The misty look in your eyes nearly makes his self-control snap as he slowly pulls his fingers out of you, groaning under his breath as you squeeze around him, trying to keep him inside.
“Noona,” Jeongguk moans, nuzzling his face into your neck, ”were you going to have all the fun without me?”
“Jeongguk?” You try to blink away the haze in your eyes, shivering as the soft fur on his ears brush along your skin. He peppers a trail of kisses down to your collarbone, breathing in the intoxicating smell of your and Seokjin’s mixed scents.
“Hyung, can I–?” Jeongguk trails off, his expression hidden from you as he looks down at Seokjin. The hamster hybrid nods, lips quirking as he uses his hold on your thighs to pull you down the bed, making room for Jeongguk to slip in behind you. You make a confused noise as you’re practically manhandled around on the bed, the bunny hybrid’s strong arms pulling you into his embrace as he leans your back against his chest.
“Is this okay, Y/n?” Jeongguk murmurs, breath tickling your ear as he rests his head on your shoulder. The bunny hybrid slowly rubs his chin back and fourth over your exposed skin, making sure to intertwine his scent properly.
“Yeah,” You let out a stuttering breath as Seokjin resumes his position between your legs, Jeongguk grabbing one of your thighs to help keep you spread open.
“Why don’t you give Jeongguk a kiss, petal? He’s been a patient bun while I was having all the fun,” Seokjin says, making you shiver as his breath blows against your heated core. Jeongguk squirms behind your back as he gets his alpha's permission to kiss you, cottontail twitching rapidly as you make an eager noise in agreement.
The three of you groan at the sound your cunt makes as Seokjin sinks three fingers back in, your moan swallowed by Jeongguk's lips as you turn your head, slotting his mouth against yours. You don’t know where to place your hands, one grabbing the back of Jeongguk’s head as the other drifts down to curl into Seokjin’s locks, overwhelmed at the sensation all around you. You pant into the bunny hybrid’s mouth as Seokjin adds another finger, Jeongguk’s eager and passionate kisses distracting you from the slight burn as you’re stretched.
You break away from Jeongguk’s lips with a whimper as Seokjin sucks harshly on your clit, making another wave of wetness coat his fingers as he drives them into you with purpose.
”You’re so perfect, Y/n,” Seokjin sighs against your mound, seemingly not fazed at all by how hard your fingers are digging into his hair.
”You too, baby,” The hamster hybrid hums, eyes glancing up to meet Jeongguk’s. The bunny hybrid mewls at the compliment, lips glued to your jaw as he adds another mark to your skin.
The next curl of Seokjin’s fingers hits your g-spot dead on, and you can’t help the way you harshly tug his head back, legs trembling at the intense feeling. You finally get a good look of Seokjin’s face, the hamster hybrid gaze so dark it almost looks a little unfocused, a light sheen of sweat covering his flushed face.
“Are, fuck, are you sure you're okay?” You ask, remembering that Seokjin hasn’t even come once yet.  
“Positive, petal,” Seokjin grunts, pink tongue swiping across his lips to collect your arousal.
“Hyung likes to drag it out when he’s in rut,” Jeongguk murmurs into your neck, bringing your leg closer to your chest. Seokjin uses the opportunity to lean back down, adding another finger as he circles you clit, giving it light sucks to add some pleasure to the slight pain of the stretch.
”He’s had them for a long time, so he knows how to control himself. He likes fighting his own instincts – likes to tease,” Jeongguk huffs.  
“Careful bun,” Seokjin groans against your slick folds, the vibration making your stomach clench, ”You know I like it when you beg, don’t make it worse for yourself by being bratty.”
You throw your head back with moan, the idea turning you on more than you expected. The sound spurs Seokjin on, the hamster hybrid quickening his fingers as he eats you out. You squeeze your eyes shut as your body begins to tremble all over, the hot pleasure in your stomach spreading through your body like wildfire. It only takes Seokjin crooking his fingers a little more to make you come undone, your legs trembling as your climax hits you like a train. You moan loudly, Seokjin’s name falling from your lips like a mantra as your grip tightens in their hair. The hamster hybrid licks hungrily between your folds, lapping at your slit as your release spills out. Jeongguk groans into your neck, fingers digging into your thigh and stomach as he strains to keep himself still.
“Seok–Seokjin, too much,” You whimper as the intense pleasure begins to ebb away, the oversensitivity taking over as he continues to slowly pump his fingers, making sure you’re properly prepared.
“Sorry, petal, you just taste too sweet,” Seokjin hums, satisfied, as he finally leans back. You moan softly, heart fluttering at the compliment.
“Hyung,” Jeongguk whines, gently lowering your leg back down as Seokjin crawls up your body. You watch with wide eyes as the hamster hybrid grabs Jeongguk’s chin, his voice raspy with want as he says, ”You’ve done well bun, want hyung to give you your reward?”
Jeongguk nods, crashing his lips against Seokjin’s while he tugs you closer to his chest. Jeongguk mewls loudly as Seokjin licks into his mouth, and you feel your face flush as you realize Jeongguk can taste you on Seokjin’s lips, the hamster hybrid’s mouth still slick with your wetness.
“Baby,” Seokjin murmurs against his lips, hand moving to cup Jeongguk's cheek, “can you be a good bun and hold Y/n for me?”
“‘course, hyung,” Jeongguk slurs, nuzzling into Seokjin’s hand. The hamster hybrid gives him another fond peck before turning his attention back to you, the obvious desire in his eyes making you a little dizzy.
“Do you want more, petal, or do you need a break?” Seokjin asks, reaching up to brush your hair away from your face.
“I’m okay,” You reassure him.
He sends Jeongguk a look, the bunny hybrid shifting back against the pillow to bring you both into a more comfortable position before Seokjin once again finds his place between your legs, groaning lowly at the sight of your slick folds. Jeongguk’s heart is hammering against your back as he watches Seokjin move closer, the bunny hybrid biting down harshly on his lips at the wet sound your cunt makes as Seokjin teasingly drags his cock through your arousal, using it to coat his length.
“God, you’re still so wet for me, Y/n,” Seokjin murmurs, bringing your legs up to wrap around his waist. You wind your hands around his neck as he leans down, grounding yourself in the silky locks between your fingers as the head of Seokjin’s cock nudges your entrance, the hamster hybrid slowly easing himself inside of you.
You let out a choked moan at how full you feel as he pushes in, the sheer girth of his cock alone driving you insane as more and more of it inches into your warm walls. Your face is burning under the intensity of Seokjin's gaze as he watches you expression carefully, the small growls leaving his mouth whenever you clench around him the only indication that he’s struggling to take it slow.  
“F-fuck, you’re so big,” You pant as Seokjin’s hips fall flush with yours, the hard cock inside of you throbbing at the praise as you try to breathe through the slight discomfort. The hamster hybrid captures your lips to distract you, keeping the pace slow and languid as he kisses you through the initial stretch.
You give him a nod once you feel okay to continue, throwing your head back against Jeongguk’s shoulder as Seokjin pulls back, excitement steadily building in your stomach at how thoroughly he’s filling you up. You know you’re dripping wet, you can hear the slick sounds of your arousal as Seokjin suddenly snaps his hips forward, sinking back into your heat. Jeongguk whines at your moan, his hands drifting to your chest as he keeps you glued to his body. You gasp as he rolls the nubs between his fingers, the sensation making you clamp down around Seokjin’s thick cock as he slams back inside.  
“You’re so fucking tight,” Seokjin growls under his breath, nudging your head to the side to attach his lips to your neck, littering the skin with tiny bruises as he steady works his way up to your ear. It’s the nip on your earlobe that makes you keen, your back arching at the intense sensations all around you. The sound makes Seokjin groan, his hips working faster as he begins to pound into you, your walls fluttering around him as Jeongguk fondles your breasts.
You dig your fingers into Seokjin’s shoulders; desperate for something to cling on to as the hamster hybrid’s unforgiving pace moves you around in Jeongguk’s arms. You can’t hold back your moans, the sounds being fucked out of you with every thrust of Seokjin’s hips. A loud whine is ripped from your throat as Seokjin changes his angle, his cock hitting your sweet spot straight on every time he buries himself inside of you. The heat in your stomach keeps building with every thrust and pinch of Jeongguk’s fingers, your legs trembling as you pull Seokjin in closer.
“Seokjin,” You whimper as you feel his knot beginning to expand, the slight stretch whenever he snaps his hips forward making you see stars, ”I’m, fuck– close.”  
“Me too, petal,” Seokjin grunts into your skin, fingers bruising from where he’s holding on to your hip. Your eyes flutter as the pleasure in your stomach brings you to the edge, your orgasm so close you can feel your body tensing up in preparation. The hamster hybrid’s pace slows down in favour of Seokjin rolling his hips into your even harder, a harsh smack sounding out in the room whenever his hips meets yours. You just need a few more thrusts, just a little more–
Your eyes snap open as Seokjin suddenly stops, his cock half-buried within your warm cunt. The hamster hybrid’s jaw is clenched tight, his eyebrows furrowed as he stares down at your neck. You can hear his fingers digging into the sheets by your head, the threads ripping as he forces himself to hold still.
You try to rock your hips to give yourself some friction, but Seokjin's tense grip on your hip doesn’t let you, a low rumble of warning sounding from his throat as he holds you still. You can feel Seokjin’s cock throb as you core clenches around him, a pained groan falling from his lips at the feel of your walls fluttering around him.
“W-why?” You slur, growing more confused and desperate for your release the longer Seokjin doesn’t let you move.
“I told you noona, hyung likes to drag it out,” Jeongguk huffs, nuzzling his face soothingly against your cheek. He plants a soft kiss on your skin, hands still fondling your breasts as your chest rises and falls rapidly, the short break giving you enough time to catch your breath. You blink away the haze in your eyes, focusing on Seokjin as he stays frozen above you. You bring one hand to his face, letting out a soft gasp at how hot his skin is, sweat beading at his forehead. The hamster hybrid looks ill, and you can feel the small shivers running through his body.
“Seokjin, are you okay?” You murmur, worried.
“I’m fine, petal,” Seokjin tries, but his hips buck forward without his permission. He curses under his breath; instincts going crazy from staying still inside of your dripping cunt, your aroused scent heavy in the air.
“Hyung,” Jeongguk touches Seokjin’s cheek, just enough to get his attention, ”You’re in rut, you can’t keep holding off your knot. Especially not the first one, it’s just going make you sick.”
Your breath hitches at the dark look Seokjin gives him, the need and hunger burning hot in his gaze as Jeongguk says, ”Noona has been so good for you, aren’t you going to breed her, hyung? Fill her up until it takes?”
You tighten your legs around Seokjin’s waist, the searing want in your body making you feel light-headed. You know it’s not possible, your birth control is making sure of that, but fuck, it’s still hot to hear. You realize a little too late that Jeongguk is trying to rile Seokjin up, his resolve finally snapping as Jeongguk purrs, "Mark her as ours, hyung, make her part of our pack.”  
You let out a choked cry as Seokjin almost withdraws his cock entirely before slamming back inside, the hamster hybrid throwing his head back as he drives his hips into you. The power behind his thrusts makes his cock reach even deeper than before, your walls clenching helplessly around him as he keeps up the merciless pace. You scramble to grab on to his shoulders as you feel his knot teasing your entrance, both of you already so wound up that it doesn’t take much to get you to the finish line.
“Fuck, Y/n,” Seokjin rasps, letting out a deep moan as you push up against him, meeting his thrusts and making his cock hit even deeper, “You’re doing so well for me, you’re such a good girl.”
You moan loudly at the praise, clamping down around his cock so hard he’s forced to slow down, a slight tilt to his hips brushing against your sweet spot so deliciously that the electricity in your stomach finally erupts, pleasure lighting up your veins as your orgasm courses through you. It hits you so hard you can barely hear Seokjin’s groans over the blood rushing in your ears, your vision growing white as he keeps up his thrusts. The pleasurable pain of Seokjin’s knot expanding just drags out your release even longer, thighs shaking as you cling on his waist.
“Oh god, fuck,” You breathe, nails raking down Seokjin’s back as he snaps his hips flush against yours one last time with a deep moan.
“Y/n,” Seokjin growls, leaning down to find your lips. He licks possessively into your mouth as his knot swells, stretching your walls until he’s locked inside. Your moans intermix between your lips as Seokjin stiffens and finally comes; spilling inside your fluttering walls as he finally gets the release he’s been needing all morning. You feel like you’re going to burst, the hot cum never-ending as it floods your insides, filling you to the brim. You mewl as his hips move in little circles, finally stuttering to a stop just as your body begins to twitch with oversensitivity.
Seokjin bites down on your lip before releasing it, soothing the flesh with his tongue before leaning back. He looks even more beautiful than normal, the light sheen covering his body making him glow in the rising sunlight. His hair looks tousled and wild, matching the heated look in his gaze as his eyes slowly trails over your face and chest.
You startle at the sudden grunt behind your back, Jeongguk whining over your shoulder as he lets go of your torso, ”’s heavy.”
“Sorry, bun,” Seokjin lets out an amused huff, collecting you in his arms before he carefully rolls over on his back, taking care not to jostle you too much. You quickly find a comfortable position on Seokjin’s chest, your face tucked into his neck as his hands slowly roam over your body, lightly massaging your tired muscles.
“You’re amazing, petal. Thank you,” He murmurs, pressing a loving kiss against your hair.
“You’re not so bad yourself,” You hum, biting back a whine as your comment makes Seokjin let out a tired laugh, his still hard cock moving against your sensitive walls.
“You should rest, Y/n, you did so well for me,” You release a deep breath, melting into Seokjin’s embrace as you feel your eyes begin to droop. Your orgasm really ripped all of your energy along with it, and you’re in a desperate need for a nap. You close your eyes, enjoying in the warm body underneath you and the soothing touches lulling you closer and closer to sleep.
You hear the soft sounds of Jeongguk moving around on the bed, the sheets shifting underneath his body and the bed dipping as he settles down next to you and Seokjin. A muffled whimper keeps you teetering on the edge of consciousness, your mind not letting you rest until you’ve figured out where it comes from. You turn your head towards the sound, opening your bleary eyes just enough to catch a glimpse of the bunny hybrid biting harshly down on his lip, his hand wrapped tight around his cock. He lets out another whimper as he runs his thumb across his slit, hips jerking into his own hand.
“Do you need help?” You mumble, smiling at the wide-eyed and enthusiastic nod you get in return. The hamster hybrid chuckles into your hair at his packmate’s response, arms winding around your waist as he breathes in your sweet scent. You hold out your hand in offer, your reach a little limited while you’re stuck to Seokjin.
Jeongguk shuffles forward eagerly, placing himself on the bed so that you have a good angle to wrap your hand around him. The bunny hybrid lets out a loud moan at your touch, rolling his hips to help you get him off faster.  
You hide your grin against Seokjin’s shoulder, your sleep long forgotten at Jeongguk’s groans and desperate little sounds.
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You creep down the stairs as quietly as possible, wincing at the soreness that flares up your legs with every step. It was after midnight when Seokjin’s rut ended, the hamster hybrid urging you to rest and clean up after spending two days with them. You don’t think a shower has ever felt that heavenly before, the hot water making your burning muscles feel a little more bearable. Though, you don’t doubt you’re going to feel it for a few more days to come.
You carefully place your foot down on the wooden floors in the hallway, slowly making your way over to the kitchen with light steps, using the flashlight on your phone to guide your way. You have a feeling the other boys probably haven’t been sleeping all that well while you stayed with Seokjin and Jeongguk, and so you don’t want to disturb them – even if you miss them. The only reason you’re even downstairs is just because you can’t go to bed with your stomach rumbling, the activities you’ve been up to over the last two days making you feel ravenous despite the food the other packs prepared for you.
You keep your eyes down on the floor as you walk, making sure you’re avoiding the bad floorboards outside of the canines’ room that you know will creak if you step on them. You breathe out a sigh of relief as you make it to safe ground, turning into the kitchen just as you hold up your phone for more light.
You stifle a scream, the sound getting caught in your throat as you’re met with a pair of shining eyes looking straight at you as you enter the room. You freeze, hand clutching your phone so hard your fingers hurt as you stare at the large shadow in terror.
You squeak, stumbling backwards as the dark figure suddenly advances. Something solid crashes against your body, strong arms wrapping around your middle to hold you flush against the shadow.
“Y/n,” Your breath hitches as something soft brushes against your arm, the fright draining out of you as you recognize the deep voice.
“I missed you so much,” Taehyung whines, tucking his face into your neck as he scents your exposed throat and shoulder furiously, “Just wasn’t the same without you.”
“I-I know,” You stutter, holding back your whimpers as the fox hybrid drags his nose across the marks on your neck, ”I missed you too.”
“It sounded like you had a good time,” Taehyung pouts. You flinch away from him as he touches a particularly sore bruise, a small growl vibrating against your skin as he says, ”Did they mark up your pretty throat all over?”
Yes. You had been shocked when you finally got to see yourself in the mirror; your upper body littered with love bites the two preys had left behind. Taehyung takes your silence as confirmation, letting out a displeased huff against your neck.
“That won’t do,” Taehyung rasps, pressing his soft lips beneath your ear, ”You belong to us too, don’t you?”
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a/n: hi .. so it’s been three months since the last update, huh? i have no idea how this keeps happening, but please forgive me :( truth is that i always struggle with writing smut, and since the previous chapter basically got half the interactions/comments of what i normally get despite so many people being excited for it, i felt like i hadn’t done a good job. it was hard to find motivation to write this chapter since it picks up where ch 16 left off, and so i kinda just ended up pushing it away in favour of working on other things. i’ll try my best not to let that happen again though. i’m not super pleased with this update, there’s quite a few scenes i ended up moving later chapters, but at this point i just needed to get through it to move on. the next chapters are more fluff heavy and less smutty, so i think they’ll be easier to write. thank you for sticking around during the long wait! 
see you all soon, stay safe! <3 if you’d like to support me, you can buy me a ko-fi! 💖
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moonchild1 · 5 months ago
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♡my favourite fics 5.0 ♡
hi everyone here's this weeks list with some more of my absolute favourites, from now on I'll be doing individual lists for each member so I'm still deciding whether to post monthly lists of what I have been reading or just continue with the favourites lists... Yoongi and Taehyung's lists are almost complete so I will post them in the week along with Jungkook and Jins. Majority of the fics contain smut so no minors allowed. Please go and show these authors love and support they are truly amazing and deserve it ♡ feel free to recommend me some fics as well I would love to hear from you so share some of your favourites too especially if it's angst I'm a sucker for angst :)
s- smut a- angst f- fluff
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Undo by @moonnightyoongi f s a (cheating au)
clandestine by @junghelioseok f s (best friends brother au)
lucid dream by @growlingyu a (break up au infidelity)
the turing test by @fortunexkookie f s a (android au)
they don’t love you like i love you by @yeojaa f a (exes)
The dating plan by @jjkthclub f s a (enemies to lovers au)
prove a point by @mercurygguk f (Dad jk established relationship au)
play date by @mercurygguk (dad jk)
purple hair dye by @mercurygguk s (established relationship au) ↬jk with purple on the set of buttter need I say more people!!)
black dye by @mercurygguk s (established relationship au)
Meet me by the crashing waves by @sftcloudkook f a (summer love au)
heartbreak veterans by @hueseok f a (strangers to lovers au)
lost stars by @hueseok f a (roommate au enemies to lovers au)
I'm yours by @hueseok (arranged marriage au)
crush on you by @high-on-food f s a (best-friends to lovers au)
kiss it better by @jincherie s (college/uni au cheerleader!jk pining)
after midnight by @gyukult f s a (fuck boy jk friends with benefits au)
unlike me by @777guks f s (friends to lovers au)
way down in bed stuy by @minstrivia s a (infidelity jk's the oc's sisters boyfriend)
dont go by @jkstompers f a (roommate au)
lovefool by @citrustan f s a
even a forest fire dies out by @9uk s a (ex-boyfriend jk)
instant gratification by @dovechim s (fuck boy jk)
proposals by @pjxmin f s a (friends to lovers)
after hours by @ggukcangetit s
apartment 224 by @sugasbabiie f s (neighbour au)
all I've got by @btsjeonjazz f s a (bad boy jk)
roses, poetry and jeon by @seraphimguks f a (enemies to lovers au)
love talk by @blue-sidez f s (boyfriend jk)
rented hearts by @army-author f (rent-a-girlfriend au)
beg by @jinfizz f s a (friends to lovers au)
Lock and key by @farfromsugafanfic f a (best friends to lovers)
(not) just friends by @taecalikook f s (friends to lovers au fuck boy jk)
forget him by @yoonpobs a (unrequited love au)
little black book: your kindred spirit by @bluewhale52 s
just one kiss by @bangtsblossom f s
lose somebody by @kooala s a (exes to lovers au)
raindrops by @jiminiethot f s a (exes au) ft. Seokjin
stolen dances by @taeyohonic f s a (ceojk best friend jk my best friend’s wedding meets 27 dresses)
to all the men i've fucked before by @hisunshiine f s a
heavy metal by @hisunshiine s (fuck buddies)
(he)art thief by @latetaektalk f a
Umbrella by @skitsoulmaty f a (strangers to lovers au)
all that glitters by @minyfic f s a (unrequited love au college au)
Knuckles by @minyfic
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carnival rides by @geniuslab f s (summer carnival au)
endgame by @jjkthclub s (best friends to lovers au)
last christmas by @xjoonchildx s (exes to lovers au)
perfect by @btssmutgalore f s a (roommate au friends to lovers au)
mine for today by @httpjeon s (fake dating au)
want sum f*ck? by @borathae s (fuck boy jin college au)
Aperitivo by @bangtanbetchfics f s (chef jin chef jk) ft. Jungkook 🤭
A lovely little mess by @justimajin f s a (friends to lovers au) ft. Jungkook
home run @jinned f a ft. Jungkook
needy by @blue-sidez s (boyfriend au)
the courtship chronicles by @gukyi f a (friends to lovers au fake dating au)
start a new by @gukyi f a (exes au)
fire and desire by @joonbird s with some drama (fuck boy jin)
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whatifyoulivelikethat · 3 months ago
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journey, m | ot7
full title: journey to the dick
pairing(s): ot7 x reader
summary: A Cinderella story but it's a dick pic. Yup, that's right. You find a dick pic on your phone and make it your mission to find the owner of said dick. Time to fuck the seven hottest guys you know! Onwards!
warnings: rated M (18+) for language, mentions of alcohol consumption / partying; horny crack, everyone radiates chaotic energy and wants to fuck; reader is comparing their dicks to above-mentioned dick pic so there's a lot of talk about dick, did I mention there's a lot of dick? dick; smut (fem reader, slight D/s dynamics in some scenes, m-receiving oral, cowgirl, penetrative sex, doggy, spanking, handjob, thigh fucking, dance studio sex, overstimulation, fingering, dry humping, 69, face-sitting, photography during sex, m-masturbation, being cummed on (neck / chest [a cum necklace LMAO] + hand), film studio sex, wall-fucking, being overheard / walked in on during sex (and not giving a shit, oops), implied car sex, implied threesome); non-idol!AU - ot7 x sex friend!reader; each member has their own scene
appearances based on the 'Butter' jacket photoshoots yes, the opening line is #50 of my prompt list LMAO title comes from Journey to the West, except it's dick because that's way more important. also, yeah, this is basically a harem hentai, but it's you and BTS, woohoo! :D
--
"Whose dick pic is this and why it is so inspirational?"
Park Jimin craned his head over to look at your phone, black hair brushing against your forehead. "Damn! That is an incredible dick."
"What are you guys talking about?" Kim Taehyung muttered, yanking your phone out of your hand and peering at the screen. His eyes widened, eyebrows shooting up into his dark brown hair. "Oh, ho! What a high-quality specimen of a dick."
"Why is it on my phone though?" you frowned, taking your phone back from Taehyung. You were sitting next to Jimin on their sofa, contemplating the great mysteries of the world. The black phone case had a cute mouse holding a large sewing needle and sitting next to a spool of sky-blue thread. "I didn't take this one, sadly."
"Maybe you were real drunk," Jimin offered.
"I haven't been real drunk since I projectile vomited in your guys' parking lot."
"That was last week," Taehyung reminded you, smiling amusedly.
You narrowed your eyes. "Look, it was a bad breakup."
"You went on, like, two dates," Jimin laughed, smacking you in the arm.
"It had potential!"
"Yeah, a potential dumpster fire," Taehyung added, rolling his eyes as he sat down on the other side of you. "I know you go for the quiet, nerdy ones, but you're just–"
"Brash? Forward? Ready to sit on dick at any second?"
Jimin was being very helpful.
Taehyung shoved Jimin's grinning face away. "It's a conflict of personality and yours is quite intense, so maybe you should try and be more open-minded about other options."
You frowned, not enjoying this pep talk that you probably needed. In fact, you avoided said pep talk at all costs. You reached back and yanked on Taehyung's ponytail. He prodded you in the left breast in response, glaring. You smacked his hand. He smacked your hand back.
Hey, when you don't have a good reply, resort to violence, right?
You looked back down at your phone. Swollen, red-purple, a good thickness. Nice length too, so hard it was sticking up without the assistance of a hand. You could spy the white pre-cum beading at the engorged tip. It was a strangely clear and well-composed photo. Black boxer briefs. Blue jeans, white shirt.
Fuck.
Could literally be any guy in the history of existence.
You turned the photo to Jimin. "Someone must have taken it last night when I couldn't find my phone for those two hours."
Jimin nodded. "Yeah, seems like it."
"You remember anyone in this outfit?"
Jimin snorted, wrinkling his cute nose. "Everyone was in jeans and a white t-shirt. 'Cause there was that wet t-shirt contest later that night, remember?"
You scratched your head. Ah, yes. Taehyung won. Man looked fucking amazing thanks to working out his arms and chest the past month. Was it solely for the purpose of a silly party gimmick? Maybe. You weren’t complaining though. You did what any good friend would do.
"Oh, right. Who won?"
Taehyung grabbed your shoulders and violently shook you. "I did! Obviously – ah, fuck you!" His tone quickly changed when he realized you were laughing like a maniac, doubling over in a pile of giggles with Jimin. "You're the worst," Taehyung pouted, holding his arms protectively.
"I'm just kidding, don't be mad," you chuckled, reaching over to hug him. He accepted it, but not without continuing to pout. You nuzzled his neck, placing soft kisses on his skin. "I bought you your favorite breakfast when you were hung over this morning, come on now."
His dark brown eyes shifted back and forth before letting out a long, deep sigh and hugging you back. Damn. He had a nice hug now thanks to these arms and his broad chest. He smelled like warm chamomile.
"I worked hard for these," he mumbled.
You patted him on the back before releasing him and holding up your phone. Back to the first order of business.
"Is this your dick?"
Taehyung scrunched up his face. "No? But I don't look at my dick at that angle either."
You puffed your cheeks and turned to Jimin.
"Is this your dick?"
Jimin plucked your phone from your hand. He tilted his head to one side. Then the other.
"Lemme check."
Then he stood up and started walking to the direction of the bathroom. Still holding your device.
"Uh..."
You trailed off.
Taehyung blinked.
The bathroom door closed.
Pants unzipped.
"PARK JIMIN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
-
"You have to be kidding me, Jimin."
"Be reasonable. I can't get hard from this dick pic. Don't you want to know the owner of said dick?"
You pursed your lips and squinted at your phone, standing in Park Jimin's and Kim Taehyung's shared bathroom, because they were roommates and your friends. The mysterious discovery of said dick pic from last night's party sparked this Journey to the Dick, because it was a very impressive, intriguing, and, most importantly, inspirational specimen of the male genitalia. Clearly you had to investigate.
For science.
Which was why you were standing in the bathroom with Jimin's sweatpants off and begrudgingly getting to your knees. Begrudgingly, because...
"I thought we were supposed to be ordering pizza and watching Running Man."
"We are," Jimin answered cheerfully. "After you suck my dick."
You glanced at the photo once more.
It remained, indeed, very rousing of certain interests.
You gripped the waistband of Jimin's black boxer briefs.
Hmm...
Hold on.
You stood up suddenly and took your phone from him, sudden determination overtaking you.
"I have to do this correctly."
Jimin blinked rapidly, jumping with a yelp as you flung open the bathroom door to reveal Taehyung throwing himself into the wall, coughing awkwardly and hiding his face with his hands as you marched out purposefully. Jimin was still pants-less.
"In the proper order!"
Jimin and Taehyung shared a confused look.
"The hell does she mean, proper order?'
-
kim namjoon.
“Namjoon, may I look at your dick?”
Kim Namjoon looked up from his book and blinked at you over his round glasses.
“Pardon?” he replied in English.
“Your dick,” you responded in kind, in English and with succinct pronunciation. “Your penis. Your willy. Your ding-dong. Your–”
Namjoon removed a hand from his book and held it up. “My what?” he interrupted you, laughing.
Oh good, back to Korean so you didn’t have to flex all the different ways you knew how to say cock in English. “Take off your pants.”
He blinked rapidly, innocently sitting there in his flowy white button-up and brown pants. He even had suspenders. Fancy man. He had dyed his hair recently, a steel midnight blue. That’s how Namjoon was, attractive and book-smart. Absolutely won the lottery when it came to genes and brains. You couldn’t see the title of the book he was reading, but it was probably a self-help or philosophy book. He was into those nowadays, exploring the human mind, while you were more into exploring the physical aspects of humanity.
Fucking.
Luckily, fucking didn’t usually require reading.
(Usually, heh.)
“I have no objections to your proposition. I’m just confused on why so suddenly.”
You dropped your canvas tote bag on the ground. Your red, short summer dress covered in yellow lemons flared out as you shifted your weight to one hip. Your phone was in one of your hands and you waved it around like a baton as you talked.
“Aren’t I usually sudden when I want to fuck?”
Namjoon chuckled, rich and deep, shutting his book and putting it aside. Probably memorized his page number. Big sexy brain and all that jazz. A fantastic characteristic of his.
He also had a big sexy dick you were asking to see right now.
“You are, but sometimes you offer to buy me a meal or a snack first.”
“I mean, sure, if you want–”
He lifted a hand and cocked a finger towards himself, smiling. When he smiled, his dimples appeared. That was your favorite feature on Namjoon. You bounced over excitedly and sat on the couch, skirt flipping up and exposing your thighs, still holding your phone.
“I’m on a mission.”
He quirked an eyebrow, adjusting his glasses detective-style. “What kind of mission?”
You pointed to your phone. “Do you remember that party we went to, the one with the wet t-shirt contest?” You lifted your arm and flexed your rather defined bicep that made Namjoon raise his eyebrows and mouth a wow under his breath. Consistent handys really did the trick when it came to bicep muscle definition. “You remember, right? You showed off your guns.”
He burst out laughing, waving a hand. “They are not guns.”
“Sure, they are. I could do a lot of social justice with your biceps, Namjoon.”
He shook his head, grinning, dimples on full display. “And what’s with the dress? You don’t usually wear such a cute style.”
You ticked your phone to the apartment front door. “I’m meeting Seokjin later, but he said he’s going to play another round of bowling because Jungkook kicked his ass again. But anyway, back to what I was saying…”
“Ah, yes. I think I remember Jimin mentioning something to me now.”
You brightened, unlocking your phone and holding up the screen. “Right! I’m looking for the owner of this dick.”
His eyes widened and Namjoon leaned forward, readjusting his glasses again. “Wow. That’s quite a clear picture.” Then he coughed and averted his eyes.
You nodded quickly. “Well? Did you take this picture?”
He frowned and sat back against the sofa, sucking in a breath and ticking his head. “Mmm, maybe? I was pretty drunk. I don’t remember what I did…”
“Hah… Does this look like your dick, then?”
“How would I know?” he chuckled. “I don’t see my dick from that angle and I don’t have sober photoshoots with my dick.”
You pursed your lips. “Well, I suppose we’ll just have to fuck then. Drop the pants.”
The thing about Namjoon was that he was a very reasonable man. You had a problem and proposed a solution and he, an avid learner who liked searching for answers to the great mysteries of this world, had the means to help you out on your quest, so he did. In addition, he thought you were hot, you thought he was hot, and you’d already fucked a couple times before Journey to the Dick, so the mutual agreement was already there.
Splendid!
The other thing about Namjoon was that he really liked to make you work for it.
Slightly less splendid.
“Are you choking?”
You squinted at him and flipped him the bird. He was well-versed with popular Western hand gestures.
Namjoon nodded sagely. “That’s good.”
And he put his hand back onto the back of your head and shoved your mouth down onto his cock once more.
You had half a second to breathe again before air was forcefully taken from you, Namjoon now holding you there, nose-first into his crotch, sighing contentedly as he expanded in your mouth. You planted your hands onto his strong thighs and pushed, but his hand didn’t budge. The safe signal was three taps and you weren’t tapping out yet. You glared and Namjoon closed his eyes, smirking slowly.
He left his round glasses on.
‘Course he did.
Damn you, Namjoon!
You reached up and pawed at the buttons of his white shirt, making Namjoon open his eyes to see what you were doing as you unbuttoned them rather deftly for someone who had his dick filling up their throat. He looked down at you, cocking an eyebrow. You cheekily cocked one back, poking his pecs with your pinky.
He grinned. “Hm? What’s that?”
You clenched your throat around the head of his cock and he gasped, losing grip for a split second.
In that split second, you threw his shirt open, glorious his tan skin and large muscular pecs now in view, and slapped your hands down onto his thighs, instantly starting a fast, rough pace, curving your neck with every swallow, sandwiching his cock between tongue and top of your mouth, pulsing your wet muscles all over his length, staring at that well-built chest, watching the muscles ripple with his sudden, abrupt inhale.
“Oh, fuck!”
Sometimes you let Namjoon have the reigns, but this time you were on a mission, although it was a little distracting now because presently you had an unobstructed view of Kim Namjoon with his shirt open, head thrown back, midnight blue hair fanning over the sofa, his full lips open and panting, tendons in his neck tensing, broad shoulders flexed, leading down his defined chest and abs, core tight from your intense pace, thighs hard under your hands, cock swollen and thick, pulsating in your mouth. His large hands planted on top of yours, squeezing them with his.
The three taps applied to him too.
Instead, Namjoon moaned your name and gripped your hands.
“T-The picture… f-fuuuuuuuck…”
Shit, that’s right.
You reluctantly slowed, tongue swiping all over the underside of his dick, tracing the veins, moaning hotly around his cock. He lowered his chin, panting hard, dark brown eyes half-open and framed by his lovely silver glasses. It was him who reached for your phone and unlocked it. He remembered your pattern lock and you had only told him once. All your consistent fucks knew how to unlock your phone.
That’s how you had so many pictures of, ahem, good times.
He placed the phone on his hip and his head fell back against the sofa, inhaling deeply as you continued lapping at the base of the head, slowly sucking on it at the same time to keep him hard.
“Mmm, fuck, that’s nice…”
You mashed the tip of your tongue against the slit and coated it with pre-cum.
“Ah, come on, look already and compare,” Namjoon chuckled in his deep voice, raising a hand to pet your head. “Then you can finish me.”
You popped your mouth off reluctantly. “Hmm.” You placed a few fingers on his cock and looked at it, positioning it to the correct angle that matched the photo. “Huh, it’s pretty close. But you have this noticeable vein here, and I think the head of your cock is slightly different…” You squinted and brought your face rather close to his stiff length. “The skin tone seems right, but it’s not exact, and I think you’re bigger…”
Namjoon wrapped his hand around his dick and smacked your cheek with the head.
“Oi!”
You puffed your cheeks, strings of saliva and pre-cum covering your face.
He grinned, dimples on full display. “Oops.”
You jabbed your finger at your phone. “I’m doing an investigation here!”
He shrugged cheekily. “You said it wasn’t exact. Get up.”
You put your phone on top of his book on the side table and glared at him. “Well, yeah, but no need to bop me,” you grumbled, wiping your cheek with the back of your hand, standing up, and removing your panties as Namjoon reached over to his pants and pulled out a condom from the pocket.
You did say you were coming. Namjoon liked to be prepared for you.
“You said you liked it,” he mused as you straddled his lap.
“I do when I’m notin the middle of an important mission,” you huffed, picking up the hem of your dress and revealing your wet pussy, chin cocked in defiance.
“You don’t have to sit on my dick then,” he said, pausing with the condom right over his cock.
You frowned. “Hurry up.”
He cocked an eyebrow, dark brown eyes trapping you in his allure. “Doesn’t seem like you want it.”
You narrowed your eyes.
Growled.
Then you smacked his hands away and rolled down the condom yourself before sliding onto him with one swift motion, clenching your jaw at the sensation of being quickly and solidly filled up, not giving him or you time to adjust. Namjoon tensed his neck, grinning, large hands coming up to firmly grip your hips. Your own came up to grab his biceps and squeeze them, mustering up your most indignant scowl. He chuckled, smirking as you pulsed your walls around him.
“Hold your dress so I can fuck you.”
“Maybe I want to do the moving.”
He clicked his tongue and rammed his hips up into you, making you hiss at the feeling of his cock being driven into your tightness. Your nails dug into his arms, breaths shallowing into rapid gasps as he continued, firmly and roughly fucking you from below, hard thighs flexing and smacking into your inner thighs and ass.
“Hold your dress,” he repeated, voice low and commanding.
“You’re so bossy,” you muttered, reaching down with one hand to yank up your dress, pulling it up high so both you and Namjoon could watch as he very deliberately and very forcefully thrust upwards into your tight hole, smirking wider as he witnessed your expression and the strain of keeping the pleasure off your face.
“Don’t have to give orders if…” He jerked up particularly hard, hitting your sweet spot, causing you to gasp breathlessly. “You…” Smack! You bit you lip, moan trapped in your chest. “Just…” Smack!
“F-Fuck…”
“Listen.”
And then Namjoon seized your hips and fucked you hard and fast with you barely holding on his shoulder with one hand and the other clutching your dress, moaning his name shamelessly to his own face. Namjoon wasn’t a gloater. His face was serious and concentrated, brows furrowed and intent on giving maximum pleasure, maintaining clear control as you rapidly lost it, allowing and trusting him to lead you into carnal desires.
You leaned forward, hot exhale on his neck, changing the angle and letting him hit you deeper, tightening around him. You heard his breath hitch, hissing out your name. Your whispered against his jaw, close to his ear.
“You like it better when I don’t listen, Namjoon.”
So close, so close, so close.
He snickered, dark, devious, sensual.
“I dolove punishing you with my cock.”
You slid your hand into his midnight blue hair and shuddered, pleasure blooming from your core in heated throbs, savoring the intensity of the orgasm he gave you as Namjoon groaned in your ear, slamming you down onto his hard, twitching cock and moaning, spilling his own into the condom, thoroughly enjoying the vicious massage of your spasming pussy. You pressed your lips to his temple, flinching with the shivers that came after, riding out the peak by rocking your hips lightly, enjoying the fullness he gave you.
“Doesn’t seem like a punishment. I’m having a lot of fun,” you taunted, panting and mirthful.
He gave your ass a playful smack and you squeezed his length from top to bottom.
“We have time for round two,” he murmured, nibbling on your ear.
Kim Namjoon was a very reasonable man.
-
kim seokjin.
"Gah, fuck!"
"As a matter of fact, yes, let's."
Kim Seokjin nearly tripped and fell against the doorframe, gawking at you. His expressive brown eyes went wide, mouth open enough for a nice ice lolly to be placed between those plump lips.
"Why are you in my bed? Where are your clothes? Why are you holding Pink Bean like that?!"
You sighed exaggeratedly. Here we go. "I had a nice dress but Namjoon took it and said I can't have it back until after." You squeezed Seokjin's large Pink Bean plush that he usually kept on his bed, a fluffy representation of a boss from his favorite PC game, MapleStory. It had a bubblegum pink head, light purple horns, and a cute :3 face. You squashed it with your breasts and looked up at him, on your knees with your feet tucked under your ass, missing all your articles of clothing thanks to Kim Namjoon.
Such cute clothes only for him? I don’t think so.
Seokjin turned bright red, sputtering.
"D-D-Don't do that to Pink Bean!"
"Why not? You've fucked me from behind and I used Pink Bean as my chest support."
He strode across the room with two steps, his long legs making it easy, looking handsome and summery in his pastel yellow shirt and shorts two-piece set, flapping his hands helplessly.
"That was a special case!"
You started bouncing on Pink Bean, you and your tits. Seokjin's brown eyes nearly bulged out of his head and he actually tripped at the end of his bed, falling face-first with a high-pitched yelp.
"Seokjin, I need to see your dick."
He yanked his head up, chestnut brown hair flying everywhere, shooting you a confused glare.
"Yah! You can't just show up naked and start demanding dick while abusing Pink Bean!"
You reached up and scooped your breasts forward, squashing them between the purple horns, nipples poking out above Pink Bean's head. Seokjin looked like he was about to pass out. Probably from loss of blood to his head.
You balanced your phone in your cleavage, inspirational dick pic between your tits.
"Is this your dick, Seokjinnie?" you asked sweetly.
He started, squinting at the screen between your tits. "The heck? What is that?"
"A dick. Is it yours?"
Seokjin made a disgusted face.
"Are they really that ugly? Mine sure as hell isn't."
"Oh, so it's not? You know for sure?"
Seokjin scoffed. "Come on, there's no way that could be mine, look–"
And he sat up and yanked his shorts and underwear off, slapping them down on the floor and spreading his legs, presenting his very hard and quite pretty dick and balls. He huffed triumphantly, planting his hands in his hips.
"How could that thing compare to–gah!"
You crawled over Pink Bean, shoving the plush against your stomach and placing yourself between Seokjin's long legs, oblivious to his shriek of surprise, holding up his shirt as you compared his cock to the one on your phone.
"What the–where did you g-get that picture?!"
Your hot breath wafted over his twitching length as you held it delicately with your fingertips, ass up in the air, tilting his dick to adjust the angle so he mirrored the photo. "Remember that party with the wet t-shirt contest?” you explained nonchalantly. “The one where I said you'd totally win because of your broad shoulders, but Taehyung got more votes because he had been working out and looking all buff recently?"
Seokjin was gasping as you held up your phone. Hmm, not the same thickness. Plus, he seemed harder, sticking out straighter than this photo dick. But there was a small mole in his dick that seemed to match the picture. The length is pretty spot-on too. You scooted closer, cradling his cock with your palm and coaxing it with your fingertips, ass bouncing on Pink Bean's head.
"Oh, fuck..."
"Anyway, someone snapped this photo and I've been trying to figure out who, but everyone was drunk and, if I recall correctly, you were on a table dancing with a pool noodle and belting Kim Yonja's 'Amor Fati', so I don't think you remember much from that night."
Seokjin's voice was pitched, strained from holding back.
"I remember those... oh, fuck... those shorts you were wearing... ah, with your ass hanging out on the bottom... fuck, wanted to bend you over... but yeah, after that..."
Then you yelped when you felt his hands on your head dragging you forward and pressing your open lips to his cock.
"Ah, yeees..."
"Seokjin, wait–mphf!"
He shoved the head of his cock into your lips and looked down. You narrowed your eyes as he began to gently hump your face, filling your mouth with the hardness. You sucked in your cheeks a little, molding your mouth to him, still giving him your best annoyed face.
"Is it my dick?" he gasped, pushing deeper.
You made a confused noise and Seokjin frowned at you.
"Yes or no?"
Seriously? You held up your hand and hovered it in the air, wiggling your fingers up and down, the universal sign of–
"What do you mean, maybe?! Oh, it's because a phone camera isn't good enough to catch the majesty of my cock, is that it?"
You could had been annoyed, but then you thought about it. He brought up a good point. You hadn't considered that. Still, the shape wasn't exact though. A phone camera couldn't alter dick angle, right?
No time to think about it because Seokjin rammed his entire length into your mouth and down your throat in your moment of contemplation.
"Mmmphf!"
"Just, ah, don't move, let me fuck your face real quick–"
You didn't really expect anything less, so you pushed him down, sliding his shirt up his torso, changing the angle so you weren't straining your neck. Seokjin fell onto his elbows, hands letting go but hips still moving, groaning as you enclosed your mouth around him and rubbed your tongue all over.
"Ah, your ass is so sexy, damn, bounce it for me..."
He seemed to forget that in order to do that, you had to hump Pink Bean like a dog in heat but, hey, when the man who called himself World Wide Handsome (drunk and sober, that was the kind of man Kim Seokjin was) asks you to twerk for him, you do as you are told and give Pink Bean the best hump that plush is ever going to have.
"Fuuuuuuuck, yes, your ass is so perky and juicy, fuck, like a sweet peach..."
You tried not to choke with laughter in his dick, but the action made your throat muscles squeeze and spasm around the head, immediately making it jerk and swell at the added simulation, causing Seokjin to gasp your name and fiercely clutch his sheets.
"Fuck, yes...!"
You looked up, cocking an eyebrow, seeing his brown hair messy and fallen over his forehead, eyelids fluttering, panting as you took over the pace, firmly enveloping him all the way to the base, sandwiching him between your tongue and roof of your mouth, dragging the head over the slick wetness, pulsing expertly around his hardness. His dainty pink tongue flitted over his lips and made them glisten, full, plump, sexy as hell.
"I'm so glad Namjoon took your clothes," he wheezed.
This guy really said whatever thought that popped into his handsome head.
You smirked around his cock and wiggled your eyebrows.
Then you grabbed his hips and really gave it to him, fast and tight, angling your head so he slid into your throat deeply and easily, sending Seokjin into a sputter of curses, prayers, and blessings to who-knew-what, gripping fistfuls of his sheets and throwing his head back, beautiful neck on display and broad shoulders flexed, moaning loudly.
You almost stopped, awed by his perfectly sensual posture.
Then Seokjin thrust his crotch into your lips and gasped your name, shooting down your throat in swift, tense jolts, forcing you to stop staring at him and hurriedly gulp it all down, squeezing your eyes shut so you could concentrate, sucking in a short breath, and making him yelp, flinching to cram more of the head into your constricting throat.
You prodded his stomach sharply and drew an ‘X’, telling him to stop so you could swallow.
“B-But…”
You gave him a bunch of other hand gestures and none of them were nice. It contrasted the way you were lapping at his cock, coaxing him back to full hardness with soft tongue and delicate pushes against the roof of your mouth. He lifted one of his hands and started messing with yours, the one on his stomach making obscene hand signals. You felt him try and grab your fingers, poke at your palm, and, finally, grab your hand and tug it up, shoving your fingers into his mouth.
You popped your mouth off his cock in surprise. “Hey!”
Seokjin looked at you with giant brown eyes like a dog caught with a treat in his mouth. “Mmphf?”
You made a confused face at him.
His tongue started sliding between them, licking your joints and pads of your fingers, wiggling all around, covering you with his saliva and sending shivers over your skin at the strange sensation. You could feel the power in that squirming muscle, his brown eyes watching your reaction, your own eyes fixated on the way it looked, three of your fingers surrounded and crammed into those lush, soft, pillow-like lips, squirming, sensual tongue slipping between them, dripping saliva down your palm and back of your hand.
“H-Hey…”
It was bizarre, feeling an odd juxtaposition of the submissive nature of the act, and yet he was deliberate and forceful about it, staring pointedly as the tip of his tongue snaked out from the side of his lips, licking the side of your pinky.
“S… Seokjin…?”
He reached up and pulled your hand out of his mouth, the pads of your fingers dragging on his lower lip, wet streaks of saliva painted down his chin.
The ghost of a smirk on his open mouth, eyebrow ticking arrogantly.
You blinked at him, unaware that you were clutching Pink Bean with your other hand so hard that your knuckles were white.
Then Seokjin grinned and wrapped your wet hand around his dick and started jacking himself off with it.
“Hey! I want that in me!”
“What? Gah!”
Somehow, you convinced him to fuck you – read: threw Seokjin down on his own bed, put a condom on him, rolled him back on top of you and guided his cock to your pussy before grabbing his ass and yanking down, making you both gasp as he entered you with one smooth stroke, your back on top of Pink Bean.
Pink Bean was really seeing a lot of your naked body today, just like Kim Seokjin.
“F-Fuck– yah!”
That was his noise of protest as you yanked his yellow shirt over his head, throwing it as far as you could, out his still open bedroom door.
“Sorry, needed to get rid of useless things.”
“I like that shirt!”
You grabbed onto his wide shoulders and rolled your hips up into his crotch, wrapping your thighs around his waist and squeezing. He sputtered at the intense feeling of your pussy wrapping around him, arms shaking to hold himself up, brown hair messy and wild over his forehead, brown eyes wide in indignation.
“Sorry, my bad, I’ll pick it up after I get another out of this magnificent dick,” you quipped.
Seokjin turned red, unaccustomed to someone other than himself complimenting him.
“Why are you hanging onto me like a monkey – oh my God…!”
You used his mattress and Pink Bean to bounce up and down on his dick from below, fingers tangled in his hair, wetly smacking your hips into his crotch, panting his name into his ear, your cock feels so fucking good, love the way you fill me, fuck me up, Seokjin, giving him the praise that he wanted and that breathless moan he liked, the one where you added a bit of underlying mischievous depth, pulling back one of your hands and tracing his plush lips, his mouth opening and pink tongue lolling out, puling you into that wetness, locking his gaze with yours.
Soft and tight around two of your fingers as you slapped your hips into his, losing a bit of your power now that a hand was occupied, intense sparks shooting from your fingertips to your core, his tongue sliding sensually between them, your juices leaking out, getting wetter and wetter, head emptying and replaced with sinful pleasure as you stared into those dark brown orbs with blown-out pupils, sparkling eyes smiling at you.
Seokjin took over and started fucking you into his mattress (and Pink Bean).
Both of you completely forgot about the dick pic.
-
min yoongi.
"Ah, fuck, I forgot, I need to see your dick, f-fuck!"
"It's," Smack! "A," Smack! "Little," Smack! "Busy at the moment."
"Yoongi!"
The bed shifted and hit the wall.
"Oh no," came the most unbothered oh no behind you.
"Your damn neighbors are going to complain again," you hissed, planting your hands on the mattress and lifting your upper body up a little to scowl at him. "They're so annoying."
"Yeah, that's why I like fucking you," Min Yoongi snickered, looking back with his curly black mullet in complete disarray, smirking lips dark and swollen from making out. He raised an eyebrow at your displeased expression, dark brown eyes flashing. "Something wrong? Not rough enough for you?"
You narrowed your eyes. "I need to see your dick when it's fully hard."
He raised his eyebrows. "Sure. After this one."
"Yoongi–"
He cut you off. "Hand," he ordered.
You extended your left hand out back to him and he grabbed your forearm, long fingers gripping tightly, before proceeding his railing of your pussy from behind, your ass smacking into his crotch repeatedly.
"Yoongi – ah, oof!"
You slipped and fell face first into his pillows, gasping at the altered depth of each thrust, hard and deliberate, filling you up as you clenched around him, following his rhythm by pushing back with your hips and moaning as Yoongi slowly built up the pace, bottoming out each time.
"Why do you need to see my dick?" he asked nonchalantly as if he wasn't pounding you with it right this very second.
"Because, oh fuck, someone left a, fuck, Yoongi, yes, dick pic on my phone, aaah, right there, fuck, you're so fucking good, that night of the party, the one with the wet t-shirt c-contest, fuck, Yoongi, I love your dick so much, fuck!"
"Why would I do that?" he grunted, spanking your ass with his free hand and making you claw at his sheets, pain seeping into the pleasure and amplifying it, skin prickling hot, causing the excessive dripping between your joined legs. The headboard was now repeatedly smacking the wall.
"I dunno, you were drunk too, do you remember, mmm, yes, harder, yeah, like that, telling Taehyung you loved him and that he was your favorite little alien child?"
Behind you, you heard Yoongi choke slightly in embarrassment.
"No, I do not..."
"See, maybe you jacked off and snapped a memoir on my phone."
Yoongi let go of your arm and firmly gripped your ass with two hands.
"Memoirs are written."
"Maybe if they wrote their name, I wouldn't be on this journey – ah, Yoongi!"
You grabbed fistful of sheets and snapped yourself back up, your hair messy and cascading down your shoulders, meeting every vicious slap of Yoongi's hips to yours, his balls hitting your soaked clit and sending stings of satisfaction from your core to your limbs, so good, moaning his name, his growl of yours punctuated by his nails digging into your ass, give it to me, come on, and you fucked him back, pressing your palms into his sheets and feeling the shuddering ecstasy again and again, deep pulses tightening around his hardness, making him groan with want.
"One more, one more, I'm so fucking close, fuck..."
"You've been close, you're holding back, you're a dick, ow!"
Yoongi smacked your ass particularly hard and you clenched your core so tight that he gasped and probably delayed his orgasm even further.
"You're the one asking to see it," he panted, adjusting the angle to shove you further into his bed even though it wasn't possible, and continued his relentless assault in your pussy.
"If anyone has a nice dick, it's you, you bas... fuuuuuuuck, Yoongi, yes, I'm gonna c-cum, fuck!"
The pleasure shot through you like lightning, waves of tortuous triumph as you clutched his pillow and screamed his name into it, your juices leaking out from around his pumping cock and splattering onto his crotch and inner thighs, drenching his balls, saturating his skin with your sweet scent, Yoongi moaning your name and squeezing your ass as he fully sheathed himself in your shaking walls and exploded into the condom, his whole length twitching and shivering inside your spasming pussy, your ass prickling on pain, both of you gasping for air.
Someone on the other side of the wall was banging it and told you two to shut the fuck up, or at least you assumed that's what that muffled yelling was.
You and Yoongi ignored it.
"Are you... hah... okay?" Yoongi panted, rubbing your ass and kneading it.
"Of course, I am, what do you take me for, an amateur?" you chuckled, lifting your head, your breathing erratic and uneven. "Now let me see your dick, Yoongi."
The other side of the wall kept swearing. Very colorful, very loud, very upsetti in the spaghetti.
Poor thing must not be getting laid regularly.
"Fuck, fine, you know I like staying in there at least for a little while..." he grumbled, holding the condom down as you untangled yourself from his body, sighing exaggeratedly as you turned around and yanked it off. You tossed it into the trashcan that was already beside the bed.
Yoongi had the foresight to be prepared for a night with you.
"I don't have to leave soon. We have plenty of time."
The shouting through the wall seemed to have given up, kicking it once and swearing very heatedly before stomping off.
"You better not. I'm not finished with you."
You picked up your phone and unlocked it, opening your photo gallery, pushing Yoongi down so you could wrap your fingers around his slick, semi-hard cock. It throbbed contentedly in your hand as you began to move it up and down in smooth, tight strokes, flexing your fingers to add variation in the stimulation.
"Mmm, fuck, yeah, faster..."
You pulled the photo up and put your phone on the bed beside his hip and calmly continued your movements, looking down at him, him and fair-skinned cheeks with a slight fluffiness to them, him and his lightly upturned upper lip that gave him a cat-like appearance, him and his lowered lashes over black-brown orbs that held quiet, sensual intelligence. His hair was messy from fucking you so hard, but he was effortlessly sexy regardless, leaning back on his elbows, torso lifted to watch your hand. Yoongi noticed you staring and raised an eyebrow, wispy black strands grazing his dark brow.
“What?”
You smiled.
“Just thinking you’re really hot, Yoongi.”
He cringed slightly, ears turning pink and shifted his eyes away, closing them. Your own roamed down, down his defined shoulders and toned arms and chest, sucking in a breath at the sight, that slim waist and pretty hips, his cock filling up your hand, getting harder and harder, the head getting darker from sensitivity, the slickness of the lube and his own cum making it easier for you and better for him. Your other hand traced his side, running your nails over it and you heard his low moan, raising your head and your eyes found his. He was observing you again, glancing from the photo to you, the corner of his lips tugging upwards, ticking his head to the screen.
“That it?”
You ran your nails over his skin, just the way he liked it, light, pressing in a little when it came to the upper side of his hip, seeing his pupils expand and his breathing shallow, pink tongue licking his lips slowly.
“Yeah,” you replied breathlessly.
You increased the pace, pumping him from base to head, entranced by Yoongi’s expression, desire and cockiness despite becoming unraveled in your hands, his lower body trembling under you, your thighs pressed to his tense ones, tempting you to sit on and rub yourself all over them.
“Pretty dick.”
Slap, slap, slap. Hand on wet cock, sending shivers through you and through him.
“That’s why it could be yours.”
You saw his cheeks flush light pink, but he didn’t look away. Instead, he made piercing eye contact.
“Stop.”
You gasped sharply and ceased all movement, feeling his rigid stiffness pulse against your palm.
“Look,” Yoongi commanded in that low, raspy voice of his.
You bit your lip and removed your hand, strings of fluids snapping between your fingers and his hot, taut skin. His cock was so hard that it was sticking straight up, dark and imposing, twitching slightly. Long pale fingers picked up your phone and held it next to his erection.
“Well?” he chuckled.
You chewed on your lip, squinting at the screen. Reached over and ran your wet fingers over his twitching length, hearing Yoongi hiss and gasp at your touch as you angled his dick to match up with the photo. Surprisingly, it wasn’t that difficult – the position seemed to match up perfectly. He was a little taller and thicker though. The shape of the head was similar, but also a bit off. The skin tone wasn’t quite correct either, the red-purple with subtly differing undertones. Still, lighting might affect that kind of detail. It wasn’t like you knew where this picture was taken.
“Hm… It’s really close, but not an exact match.”
“Well, damn.”
Yoongi tossed your phone aside carelessly, hand reaching out and you bent down, already knowing what he wanted, lips to lips, sliding against his body. You loved the way he kissed. Intense but soft, hand on your jaw and thumb caressing your cheek, nail grazing your earlobe, whispering into your lips, put me between your thighs, and you shifting up, closing your thighs around his wet cock, his lustful sigh and smirk on your lips, slowly thrusting in between your legs.
“Tighter.”
You hooked your ankles, one over the another and squeezed.
“Mmm, fuck yes, you’re so good…”
His words reminded you of the first time, crammed into the backseat of a small car, snuck out of a party to have Min Yoongi pull you into his grasp, tongue and lips all over you, your arms over his shoulders, wondering what you were doing because this kind of guy wasn’t your type, quiet, yes, a music nerd, yes, however he knew what he was doing, light bites on you skin making you gasp and slide down his jean-covered thigh, delicious friction to your soaked panties, tipping your head back to give that decadent mouth more access to your throat.
Your phone vibrated in your back pocket. A certain someone was probably wondering where you were.
“Yoongi, how… fuck, yes, how are you so good… you’re so good…”
His deep voice over your vocal cords, vibrating them with his seductive tone.
“DND your phone,” he purred, drawing a line down your throat with his tongue, coating you with his saliva, his musky, woody cologne transferring to your shivering skin.
“What…?” you panted, unable to think straight.
He plucked it out of your back pocket, tapping it against your arm.
“Put it on do not disturb and I’ll make you cum so hard that you’ll be coming back to me all the time.”
You fumbled with your phone, strong hands scooping out your breasts from your top, those lips sinking into your cleavage and tongue ghosting over your nipples, moaning as you dropped it, ignoring Park Jimin’s text, lost in those skillful hands and that expert mouth that eventually kissed down to your pussy and drove you crazy, but not before setting your skin on fire and making you beg for it.
“Yoongi…”
His lips on yours, his eyes and your eyes both half-open, marveling at the way his lashes adorned those black brown orbs and the way he looked at you, drunk on lust and your body.
“You want me?”
Hands on your hips, grinding you down on his thigh, teasing you. He wasn’t your type, he wasn’t your type, he wasn’t your type… so why, why did that sly, knowing gaze do things to you? Why did it make your heartbeat stutter and your juices seep into the denim of his jeans, so turned on that you didn’t want anything else right now but Min Yoongi?
It just didn’t make any sense.
“Y… Yeah…”
That smirk.
“I know you do.”
You did end up coming back all the time.
He was very good and it wasn’t just his mouth.
Yoongi backed up and smirked, open-mouthed, mischievous, so fucking hot that you felt your pussy throb at the mere sight, his warm, pulsing length still jammed between your soft, closed thighs.
“You wanna ride my dick?”
You grinned. “Thought you’d never ask.”
You completely forgot about the photo and spent the rest of the night on Yoongi’s cock and ignoring the yelling from his neighbors.
-
jung hoseok.
“Hoseokie…”
Teeth on your ear, a dexterous, teasing tongue flicking your earrings, your name coming out of that heart-shaped smile in a low, sultry whisper that contrasted it.
“You can’t come here looking like this and not expect me to want to ruin you,” Jung Hoseok purred into your ear, sending shivers down your spine.
Your lips curved into a smile.
You were on your knees, spread out a little, short black minidress hiked up your thighs, facing the mirrors of the dance studio. Hoseok knelt behind you, hands travelling all over your body. Deft fingers, neatly manicured nails, his sharp jaw grazing your shoulder, pulling down the thin straps. Your large hoodie was tossed to the side, scattered onto the hardwood floor in haste. The frosted door of Smile Hoya’s rented dance studio space was locked, hip-hop music blaring loudly, and in the center was you and Hoseok.
You knew he could hear your shuddering exhale well, already attuned to the sounds of your pleasure.
He smirked and kissed the top of your ear, yanking down the top of your dress.
It wasn’t like this the first time.
“Ah, well, I was hoping… wondering, ah… I don’t know how to say…?”
You were in his bedroom at the time, confused. “Yoongi said you wanted to talk to me about something? What is it, Hoseok?”
He had been very nervous, somewhat shaky, staring into your eyes. You reached over and squeezed his hand, tilting your head. He took a moment to speak, hiding his brown eyes under his blond hair.
“Uh, well, I was talking to hyung and I mentioned I… I feel like I have to put up a front sometimes. Because I’m so happy and stuff. Women expect me to be like that… in bed… And he suggested that maybe you could help me… chill out, but, uh, that’s really rude to say, ah, I shouldn’t have–”
He tried to yank his hand out of yours in panic but you held on, tugged forward by his movement. Hoseok squeaked, ears turning red, freezing in place.
“Hey.”
You held his hand and patted it with your free one, smiling gently.
“I absolutely can help you chill out when it comes to sex. What do you want to know? What do you want to do? I’ll teach you.”
You noticed his expression change from panic to worry, chewing on his lip.
“N… No, you misunderstand… It’s not having sex, I…”
He trailed off, suddenly silent. You frowned slightly, nudging him. Hoseok cleared his throat and looked you dead in the eye.
“I’m not nice.”
Now he squeezed your hand tightly, breathing in your scent.
“Or rather, I don’t want to be nice when I fuck. Sometimes I want to let go and just…” He frowned, not seeming to know the word.
You leaned in, whispering in his ear.
“Fuck?”
“Yeah, I just… don’t want to think about an image I have to uphold.”
You grinned. “Yoongi did direct you to the right woman.”
His blond hair was even lighter now, the tips dyed with navy, a soft, sexy contrast to his rich tan skin. This was now many, many fucks later, hooking up at parties, at random times at his apartment, and now at the space he rented to practice dance on his own. Hoseok liked to freestyle and feel the music. When he fucked, he liked to feel the moment.
His hands gripped your breasts and squeezed, sandwiching your nipples between his index and middle finger, tugging hard.
You gasped in his hands, just what he wanted, open-mouthed smirk and all.
“Hoseok… I have to… ah, ask you something…”
He shoved his hips into your back and you gasped at the thinness of his shorts, rubbing his hardening cock against the top of your ass. A brown orb watched you through the mirror and he was smiling that brilliant, heart-shaped smile, contrasting his forceful touch.
“What do you want to ask?” he chirped cheerfully, pinching your nipples and twisting them.
You moaned, savoring the swift, firm pain followed by the pads of his fingers rubbing the tips of your nipples, grinding your ass onto his stiff length. Your phone was in your right hand. You bit your lip, seeing him watch you carefully in the mirror. You raised the phone and unlocked it.
“Is this your dick?”
You noticed Hoseok pause and squint. You turned your phone and held at up so he could get a good look. His hands were still on your tits, although he had paused the moment to view the image, blinking rapidly at it.
“When was this taken?” He tilted his head, looking confused.
“The party with the wet t-shirt contest? The–”
“One where Yoongi grabbed Taehyung and told him he was his favorite alien child?”
“Oh? You do remember?”
Hoseok winced, as if the events of the night haunted him. “I remember… not much after that…”
“Oh…” You faltered. “So you wouldn’t remember if you took this picture on my phone, huh?”
“No, sorry.”
“Then… can I see it?”
He grinned. “You have to earn it.”
Earning it could mean anything.
Today, earning it meant cumming at least three times with Hoseok’s fingers before he even let you take off his shorts.
“H-Hoseok…!”
He always smelled so good, so fucking good, orange and musk complemented with the barely-there vanilla sweetness, a scent that always seemed to linger on your skin afterward. His lips were on your neck, leaving small bites, chuckling darkly. One hand on your nipple, the other between your legs, your dress bunched at the waist and your panties at your knees, not letting you take any of it off, forcing you to watch yourself as he wrecked you, teasing your oversensitive clit with his fingertips, slick and slippery, thighs shaking from the second orgasm and coaxing you to the third, sharp throbs of lust causing your eyes to roll back, head falling against his shoulder.
“Hoseok, p-please…”
He had no trouble holding onto you, flexible and strong, and you were grinding your hips down, lost in the feeling, leaking everywhere because he hadn’t actually put his fingers inside you yet, teasing you and teasing you and teasing you, driving you crazy, please put your fingers inside me, please Hoseok, your name murmured gently in your ear, no, not until the third time, and then I’m going to put my cock in you once you’ve shown me how good of a girl you are, and you were going to lose your mind, shivering in continued ecstasy, squirming in his hands, your own reaching back and fisting his hair and white shirt, moans masked by the loud music, so close, so close, your perfume mixing with his, sex and cologne, shivers and heat, teeth on your ear and circles rubbed onto your aching nerves.
Shallow gasps.
Peaking pleasure.
Seeing nothing but black, eyelids fluttering, wanton moans torn from your throat.
The song ended.
Hoseok removed his hand from your nipple and covered your mouth, muffling your scream as you came, taking your air and your sanity, pleasure rocketing up your core, crying out with need for something, anything, inside you, pushing your hips back into his crotch, feeling his cock swell at your bouncing ass, desperate for him.
The music began again.
Now you were on your hands and knees, suddenly released, gasping for breath, legs shaking from the aftershocks.
“Look.”
Turning around, your shaking hands pulling down his shorts hurriedly, still wearing your black dress and panties around your knees, hardly registering the inconvenience, not caring, completely focused on the semi-hard length in front of your face. No time. Hoseok gave you no time, grabbing your face and dragging your open mouth to him, sliding into your lips, his oversized shirt touching your nose, you whimpering at the hotness and tautness of his velvet skin. The fullness invaded your throat, taking your breath away. He buried himself all the way in before yanking his shirt up and over his head, tossing it aside with his vest that was shed earlier, far too hot now, looking down at you through his lashes.
“Don’t choke.”
Hand in your hair, pushing you down, not letting you move as he rolled his hips into your face, the head rubbing against the rood of your mouth and your tongue pushing it up to make it tighter for him, taking him deeper, hazy and intoxicated on orange, musk and vanilla. His other hand held your phone up, unlocking it with ease.
Smirk on those lips, heart-shaped and teasing. “So? Is it mine?”
You whined, not wanting him out of your mouth.
“Your choice,” Hoseok chuckled, tone light and unassuming, the edge of danger only visible in those sparkling brown eyes. “Find out or I’ll cum in your mouth and not in that pretty pussy of yours I’m looking at right now.”
Right, because you were bent over, ass facing the mirror, wetness dripping down your inner thighs.
Fuck.
You backed up, growling, glaring at the picture you knew all too well now.
“Well?”
Fine, fine, fine, you were on this fucking Journey to the Dick, and it was starting to feel more like an annoying side mission than the actual main storyline, but, whatever, you reached up and angled Hoseok’s cock slightly, sucking in a breath with him as you looked from phone screen to the delicious real-life specimen. Hm, okay. Similar in length and color. Not in angle though. Shit. And not in width either, barely a hair slimmer and the vein placement was more prominent on Hoseok’s length than this dick.
“Fuck, it’s really fucking close but I don’t think it’s yours.”
“Shit,” Hoseok sighed, turning your phone off and tossing it onto his discarded shirt. “Oh well.”
You narrowed your eyes, pouting. “What kind of react–gah!”
Hoseok pushed you down onto the ground, pushing his shorts down to his knees and pulling out a condom from the pocket, cocking a brow. You sputtered, trying to untangle yourself from the labyrinth of your own clothes, but only managed to kick off your panties before he got the condom rolled down and pushed your legs up, lifting your ass completely off the floor.
“Can’t have this pretty ass on this dirty floor,” he snickered, lifting himself higher, bending you in half, almost on your upper back, nearly uncomfortable, but Hoseok was stronger than he looked, and when he gave you what you needed, you instantly forgot about the discomfort.
“Oooh, fuck, Hoseok!”
He plunged into you, into hot wet tightness, stretching you out easily from the previous wetness, clit throbbing as he smacked his hips down, his balls slapping against your ass, drawing out another moan as his fingers brushed your clit, making you spasm and clench around his cock as he teased the overstimulated bundle of nerves.
“Fuck, yes, so tight, so wet, so desperate for a cock to fill this hole, aren’t you?” he purred, still so sweet but with such dirty words, so handsome with his blond hair and navy tips, heart-shaped smirk and glittering eyes, and the way he said your name, dainty and serene, slowly thrusting into you, but so hard, he was so hard from being inside you, completely consumed by the physicality of the act and no longer the same man who had been worrying about how you would perceive him.
That seemed ages ago now.
Your hands reached up between your legs, running your fingers through his hair, completely forgetting about the photo of the mysterious dick and focused on the one thrusting between your legs, smiling up at him, those brown eyes and lovely jaw.
“You’re so good, Hoseok, so fucking good to me, fuck, harder, yes, ah…”
Both of you forgot about the music, fucking through the pause between them, hoping that everyone else was too busy with their own choreography to think about the hot gasps and moans exchanged between you and him in the middle of the room, the act reflected in the wall of mirrors, the slap of skin-on-skin echoing off the walls, your name and his name in breathless whispers, tight and full and hot and wet and soaring on sky-high pleasure, climbing altitude and running out of oxygen.
“Fuck, gonna cum, fuck–”
“Ah, Hoseok, yes…”
Tip, free-fall, you clamping a hand over Hoseok’s mouth and his hand over yours, screaming into each other’s palms at the intensity and the force of orgasm, smacking your hips together and holding them there, feeling his cock twitch inside you and your shivering walls clamp around him in rough, intense pulses.
It took a moment to disembark from the euphoric high.
“Hah… we should… probably not fuck here…” he gasped, falling a little, cradling your ass so it didn’t directly touch the floor.
“I’d fuck you anywhere, so that’s your fault. You need to be the voice of reason.”
He laughed, rich and infectious, and you grinned, holding his head against your breasts and hugging him tightly.
-
park jimin.
“I hate you.”
“Come on, Jimin.”
"I was supposed to be first!"
"Oh my God, are we going on about this again?!"
"You were supposed to suck MY dick first!"
"Stop being a fucking brat, Park Jimin!"
"No!"
You tackled him and you both fell to the floor, rolling into a mess of giant t-shirts, fierce kisses and your hands in his now red hair, fiery and hot-headed like he was being right now.
"You little–"
"Don't you dare call me little!"
"I was gonna call you a little shithead but if you wanna be a big shithead, that's fine with me!"
He pinned you down and you grabbed his waist with your legs and rammed your crotch into his black shorts, making him gasp in horny pain and crumple into his laundry that you were supposed to help him fold, but instead you were wrestling and he was complaining about not getting his dick sucked.
It was your turn to pin him down with your arms and your thighs, Jimin seeing stars as he struggled to breathe from your lower belly smacking his erection the wrong way.
"Why, ack, why did you run off saying there's a proper order?" he choked out, choking harder as your panty-covered mound sat down on his length and started rubbing up and down, smirking down at him, his red hair flaring out on his cream rug.
"'Cause there is," you replied, calm and cool.
"Order of what? Order of how you fucked us?"
"Nah, I fucked Yoongi first, remember? At that party, ages ago..." you hummed, extending the expanse of your movement, sliding up and down his thighs, his plush lips open and moaning softly, his grip on your large t-shirt tightening. It was actually his, because neither you nor Jimin knew the meaning of keeping your clothes on.
"Yeah, in my car!"
"Eh, you were drunk and playing pool with Taehyung, which, by the way, he mad cheated and you didn't even notice."
"Fuck!"
You weren't sure if that exclamation was related to your teasing or Taehyung cheating, but Jimin removed one of his hands from your shirt and flipped off the wall, in the direction of Taehyung's room.
Ah, so not you.
"Is it age order? But Namjoon isn't the oldest..." Jimin refuted himself, frowning.
"He’s first because he's kind of like the leader of you guys, isn't he? You all end up listening to his reasoning anyway."
Jimin squinted, pouting. "That's just because his tall and smart and has a fatty IQ."
You grinned. "148."
Jimin looked very annoyed that you remembered the exact number.
“I never thought about it, but other than that, it is age order, huh?” you mused, bouncing on his dick.
He shuddered with satisfaction, rolling his hips into you. “Then why would you…?”
You shrugged. “Your names sound good together like that. Kim Namjoon, Kim Seokjin, Min Yoongi, Jung Hoseok, Park Jimin, Kim Taehyung, Jeon Jungkook…”
Jimin added your name last with an amused smirk. You bit your lower lip, cocking an eyebrow and sporting a devious smile, leaning down. Lips to lips, a soft sigh, remembering that night, stumbling out of Jimin’s car and tangled in Yoongi’s touch, still kissing Yoongi with your ass on the hood of the car. Jimin had been annoyed at you then too, how could you fuck him first and not me, Yoongi laughing in that raspy, sexy way of his, because I asked, dumbass, Jimin grabbing your face and kissing you right in front of Yoongi, the older man clicking his tongue and squeezing your ass tighter, unimpressed.
In some ways, that night started off the chain reaction of hey, why not me?
Okay, maybe you did have some frustrations about your dating life and ended up tumbling into their beds for, ahem, emotional support, but in your defense, they were all great when it came to emotional support.
“Sit on my face.”
“That’s not the angle of the dick pic though.”
“Then just take the pic from that position. That’s how it was taken, right?”
Sometimes, Park Jimin was a damn genius.
He was great at eating pussy too.
“Ah, fuuuck, Jimin…”
A little messy at first, humming approvingly at your taste, thrusting his tongue into you and moaning as your muscles closed in on it, your slick nectar painting those beautiful, soft lips, him pressing them to your heat, lewd kisses, tongue swiping up and down.
“Gotta clean you up so you can dirty me up,” he breathed, tracing sensual patterns in between your thighs with his tongue, small nips to make you whine, his hands on your ass, moaning into your pussy as your kiss came into contact with his rigid cock, dripping saliva and licking it back up, gyrating your tongue at the tip and licking off the pre-cum, savoring the taste, strong and almost sweet.
Everything about Jimin was sweet, even when he was frustrated with you.
“Fuck, give it to me.”
His hands on your ass, pushing you down, setting your pussy flush onto his lips, blocking off his airway and moaning hotly, desperate, needy, wanting your noises as you swallowed him, his length swelling in your mouth at the wet encasement, swirling your tongue all around.
You’re so mean. I can’t believe you wouldn’t ask me first, get on your knees, come on, aren’t you sorry?
You weren’t, not even in the slightest bit sorry for fucking Yoongi in his car, but you had enjoyed his little pout and twinge of jealousy, kisses up his muscular thighs, the same thighs you were clutching right now, one hand tucking your hair behind your ear, remembering his hand on the back of your head, pushing you down on his cock, the same cock you buried all the way into the back of your throat, blocking your own ability to breathe, suffocating on it as Jimin groaned, coming back up for air, rushing exhale washing over your skin before returning to his work on your clit, rapid, intense licks that shimmered pleasure through your veins.
Jimin made you choke on his dick after the Yoongi incident, but you were the one in control of it now, rutting the head against your throat muscles, feeling it get harder and harder. He always felt so good in your mouth, recalling him saying once, I just really like getting my dick sucked, shut up and stop shaming me, tongue and lips and saliva, remembering how much he liked it when you held the base and focused on the tip, his muffled whines getting more intense and vibrating your core, making sure to pop your lips over the bottom of the head every time you came up and then pressing them tightly as you went back down, doing it all at that fast, suffocating pace that made him stop licking you to throw his head back and moan, loud lust radiating off the walls, not caring about disturbing anyone, too absorbed into your pace to be considerate.
“F-Fuck, yeah, just like that, fuck, you’re so good…”
Jimin was part of the reason you were good.
He really liked getting his dick sucked. Your mouth was one of his favorites and usually readily available.
Win-win.
“Faster, fuck, oh, shit, I’m gonna cum, mmmphf!”
He grabbed your ass and smothering himself with your pussy, body trembling under you as his cock jerked and shot into your throat, your lips closing in, sucking hard to drink his cum, his moans filling your wet hole and tongue all over your clit, furiously licking as you rubbed the twitching head into the roof of your mouth, his hips squirming at the overstimulation, but his violent grip and nails digging into your ass was telling you to do it, telling you he loved it, telling you he needed it, begging you to do what you did best, gulping around the head and then jamming it into your throat, cutting off your air.
He sucked on your clit, hard, whining so loud that you could feel it in his chest and racing heartbeat pressed against your lower belly, almost lifting your lower half with his upper body alone, showing off his strength from dancing. You angled your head, taking as much as you could, nose in his balls, whimpering around his cock and the snap of orgasm making your entire body flinch, leaking all over his face and into his mouth, his nose buried into your pussy, tongue soothing your throbbing clit, wave after intense wave, barely breathing, lightheaded with pleasure, clutching his thighs tightly, naked bodies suddenly dirty, surrounded by clean laundry.
Jimin yanked his head out from between your legs, panting in satisfaction, diving back in to shove his tongue on your quivering hole and scoop out your orgasm, sucking it out to drink it, murmuring your name into your slick juices.
“You taste so fucking good, fuck…”
You came up for air, gasping, tongue lolling out, holding his cock and rubbing the slit against your wet muscle. His stiff length twitched, still hard because of your mouth.
“Take the picture, mmm, yes, did you forget?” Jimin gasped into your pussy.
You fumbled with your phone beside his leg, still reeling from orgasm and Jimin’s continued ministrations, putting it in selfie mode and seeing the lower half of your face, chin shiny with saliva, his cum dripping off your lower lip, his cock in front of your face and naked chest, your breasts pressed into his abs.
You thought about licking off the visible cum, but then you decided against it, snapping the photo with your tongue hovering close to his rock-hard erection.
You knew the composition of the inspirational dick pic now, so you brought it up in a photo editing app, putting the two side by side while wrapping your lips around the head of Jimin’s cock, sucking it leisurely like a lollipop. He didn’t ask you to get off.
Instead, he planted your pussy into his face and suffocated himself with it again.
You studied the two photos. Hm. Firstly, yours was much sexier. No offense to white t-shirt, blue jeans, and black boxer briefs guy, but your glistening cum-covered lips and squashed tits in the background of the cock made the photo eons better than his. Jimin would definitely be asking for yours later. Anyway, back to the picture. Hmm. Jimin’s dick was slightly shorter and straighter, with a warmer skin tone to his purple-red tip, although the head shape was spot on. Was that possible to have a different length but almost identical head shapes? Did dicks work that way? Did Jimin have an equally sexy twin brother or doppelganger somewhere?
Hm, a threesome with basically two Jimins would be hot as hell.
He patted your leg and you climbed off him, sighing as you rolled over and pursed your lips, concluding that his wasn’t the mystery dick. Once again, close, but no dick. Wait. That wasn’t the saying. Eh, whatever.
“Fuck, send me that photo later, I’m gonna jack off to it.”
You laughed, feeling him crawl beside you and roll you onto your stomach, pinning you down with his naked body. “You wanna jack it to your own dick?”
He was rubbing said dick into the crevice of your ass cheeks now, using your saliva was lube. “Fuck yeah I wanna jack it to my own dick with your lips covered with my cum and your titties on my stomach, sounds fuckin’ hot.”
“You’re such a pervert, Jimin.”
“And you aren’t?”
The front door slammed shut. There was a loud yell of your name in deep baritone.
“Aw, hell no, I’m getting it in this pussy first, I got time before he comes to collect,” Jimin growled, reaching into his discarded shorts and ripping open a condom, scrambling off you and rolling it down his still-hard length, grabbing one of your legs.
You shifted to your side, glaring at him. “What am I, taxes?”
The deep voice called your name again, asking where you were.
He didn’t have to wait long for an answer though, because Jimin thrust into you and you ended up moaning Kim Taeyang’s name to inform him of your whereabouts, causing Jimin to bend over and fuck you hard and rough.
“I can’t believe you would moan his name like that with my dick inside you,” Jimin growled, looking far too cute to actually be pissed at you. “Gonna fuck you so hard that you’ll be sore for him.”
Everything about Jimin was sweet, even when he was firmly fucking you into his floor and making you yelp as Taehyung burst the door open, sighing at the scene.
“Who would have fucking guessed what you two are doing…”
-
kim taehyung.
"You're so fucking stubborn."
"Wow, that's really rude, I don't make comments about your–"
"Shut up, I'm deleting his number."
You narrowed your eyes and frowned, sitting with one leg bent on Kim Taehyung's bed. He was currently in possession of your phone, clicking his tongue and pressing buttons on the screen.
"When someone tells you to leave them alone, you leave them alone," he scolded.
You cowered slightly, eyes shifting. "I was only asking if he was doing anything this weekend... I didn't have any ulterior motives..."
Taehyung squinted. You deliberately avoided his gaze. He sighed, crossing his arms. You were still wearing Jimin's shirt with nothing underneath so, uh, maybe he had good reason to be suspicious.
"You have a virgin kink."
You choked on nothing. "What, no, I don't–"
Taehyung reached over to his desk and put on the thin, gold-framed glasses he kept there. He tilted his head and raised an eyebrow. You abruptly stopped talking and gawked at him, breathless at the way his dark brown orbs were bordered by gold and his long, black-brown hair, the rest tied back in a small ponytail.
"And a glasses kink."
He took them off and you sucked in a tight breath, grimacing.
"That's why you keep going after these kinds of guys," Taehyung tutted, neatly folding the specs and placing them back on his desk. "And why you bonked Namjoon-hyung so fast, only to realize that he is not, in fact, a virgin."
"W-Well, he's still good..."
"Same reason why you got so excited when–"
"Look," you cut in, chopping the air with your hand, not letting Taehyung finish. His eyebrow seemed permanently raised. "I'm off my bullshit for now, no? I've got a mission–" You pointed to your phone and he held it out of your reach. You scowled and bounced back down into the bed. His eyes weren't following your face, but you ignored it. "–and I'll stop okay?"
Taehyung cocked his other eyebrow.
"Serious. You just deleted all the numbers except you and your friends, right?"
He turned the screen, thumb hovering over a certain number. Him and his friends were listed from one to seven, in order.
His thumb was over number seven.
"Don't," you whined. "Please, Tae."
His brows lowered, serious expression on his handsome face.
Then he smirked, dumping your phone on the bed.
"Silly girl," he drawled, crawling onto the bed, advancing towards you, sultry gaze and enchanting eyes making you forget about your device. "Why would I do that? He likes you so much."
You growled slightly, letting him push you down but not relenting. "That's really fucked up."
"That I wanna hear you say please?"
His hand lifted and cupped your chin, mischievous smile, unable to contain his pride for his little trick, sliding his leg between your thighs, tilting his head.
"Not just any please," he murmured, deep voice silky smooth, dark curled stands brushing against your cheeks he leaned in, hot exhale on your lips. "Your needy please when I threaten to take your precious Jungkookie from you."
You tried to close your legs but he stopped you with his knee, tilting his head, highly amused at your narrowed eyes.
"You don't like it?" He was leaning down, feathery kisses on your lips and cheeks. "I know you like it when I tease you." His honey voice was dripping into the fire, turning into fuel that fed the sparks of arousal, your hands coming up to clutch his black shirt, pulling down the center zipper, his deep chuckle in your skin, hand from your chin sliding up to your hair, the other tapping down your front, grazing the thin t-shirt material.
"Don't..." you gasped, his deft touch toying with the hem. “Don't use the others against me. That's not fair...”
“Mmm, yeah?”
Drawing circles on your inner thigh with his nail, nicking the skin.
"You only want to think about me?"
Your phone hummed with a notification. Taehyung chuckled, fingers creeping closer and closer.
"Aw, I wonder who that is? But that's too bad, because you're all mine right now."
You gasped, clutching his open shirt as his fingers slid in, two because you were already wet, shallow breathing and lidded eyes telling him enough, taking your lips with his, pace slow and steady and maddening, spreading your legs with his knees, forcing you to tip your hips up to him in an embarrassing position.
Then again, embarrassment during sex wasn't part of your vocabulary.
You pushed his black shirt down one shoulder and reached in, your fingers snaking to the hem of the white undershirt and stroking his skin, his satisfied exhale hot against your neck, you remembering the way the water drenched the fabric and stuck it to his golden tan skin, playfully flexing his defined chest and biceps, adorable and arousing because Kim Taehyung was both. He separated his digits inside your pussy to create a loud, sharp, wet squelch. You heard him grin, smug at the dirty sound, then begin plunging his fingers in and out, in and out of the tightness, trying to be as noisy as possible. You clenched your core to make him work for it, force him to be rougher with you, his fingers curling in your hair, yanking firmly, lips on your ear.
"See, how can those boys you pick keep up with you, hm? They won't know what to do with your pretty, sexy self," he purred, faster, harder, pushing you to the edge with your heated moan and your hands all over his chest, lifting your hips to meet his touch. "You need us to take care of you, don't you?"
Fuck, the way Taehyung said your name.
Like it was a decadent sweet he was craving, a taste compared to no other.
Your head fell back into the pillows, breathing in his warm scent in shallow puffs, his name pouring out of your lips, yearning and desire.
"Mmmm, Taehyung...."
Melting you into it, sweet bliss and sharp jerks of your hips into his hand, gasping at the flood of euphoria, trying to squeeze your thighs around his hand and stopped by his open legs. Your throbbing pussy gripped his fingers and made him hiss, his devious smirk growing as you lowered your chin again to look into those dark eyes, shivering under his intense gaze.
“Let’s play a little game.”
His tongue slid out, lickings your lips lightly.
“It’s called, how many fingers can I stuff in you before you’re begging for my dick?”
“What kind of – oh, f-fuck!”
One more.
Aching tightness, clenching your jaw, trembling at the ease of it, Taehyung cocking an eyebrow.
“Ah, yeah, three’s too easy, huh? You already warmed up.”
One more.
“Fuck, Tae, fuck!”
His dark eyes glittering, pleased at your reaction.
“That’s better. That’s what I wanna hear.”
Whines in your throat as he picked up the pace, fast and hard, clutching his shirt and his side, your nails digging in, stretched out and stuffed with four, your eyes rolling back and one leg sliding up to hook around his waist, meeting each thrust, so deep, so full, so wet, loud and obvious and uncaring of who was listening – probably Jimin with a huge smirk on his face – panting Taehyung’s name over and over, feeling the strength in his hold and his grip in your hair, pulling lightly, shooting pricks of pain down your head to meet the oppressive pleasure brimming in your core, closer, closer.
“What do you want?” Taehyung growled, that deep voice dangerously low.
“Y-Your c-cock, p-please…” you managed to gasp out, chasing it, chasing the fullness and the depth.
“Can you take it? Can you take it like the good girl you are?”
“A-Ah, yes, please Tae, want it,” you moaned, your fingernails digging into his back, scratching down as your orgasm shattered through you, making your whole body shake and shiver from the intensity, him pulling out. Your moan turned into a hoarse whimper, squirming as he rubbed your clit with his slick fingers, spanking it and teasing it, rocketing you into peaks and valleys of cut-off ecstasy that drove you insane, clawing at his clothes, desperate for his body on yours.
“What’s your magic word?”
“Please.”
He grinned at you despaired tone.
“That’s it.”
It took no time at all, your shirt flung aside, Taehyung losing his clothes that were already half-off, hot body to hot body, heated kisses and rummaging in his nightstand drawer, groaning into his mouth as his cock slapped your thigh, hard and thick and ready, dripping pre-cum on you before he yanked you up on top of him, ripping open the condom.
“Work for it.”
Lacing your fingers in his, sliding down onto that impressive girth and gasping as it twitched inside you, rolling your hips down onto it, better than his fingers, bouncing on it with your tits following your rhythm, squeezing his hands. Taehyung liked this kind of intimacy, the kind where he was grinning like the devil under you but still holding your hands as you railed yourself with his dick, rough and hard with your own smug smile, a little erratic but somehow good that way.
He made you work for it and you were good at working for it.
You found a good rhythm and – ba dum tss – rode it, leaning forward to deepen the angle and make it last longer, pulsing around his length with your tight walls, control and power and endorphins, each smack adding to the lewd melody that mixed with heavy moans and shuddering gasps, bringing Taehyung on your rollercoaster, his hips rising, your name rumbling in his chest, blood thudding in your ears at the baritone depth.
“Yes, such a good girl, gonna make me cum, don’t you want me to cum for you?” he panted, fishing for the magic word, bouncing one of his dark brows, his long hair flared out on his pillows, high cheekbones and strong features no longer hidden by wayward strands.
Your tongue between your teeth, grinning wide.
“Yes, please.”
The right inflection of winded want, maybe a little mischievous, but Taehyung liked that, for there was no fun in someone who was too easy.
“Fuck, you’re so fucking sexy.”
He squeezed your hands and thrust his hips up fiercely, shock bolting from your core to your spine to your head, your head snapping back, gasp torn from your throat, flooding his crotch with your juices, overstimulated clit rubbing on the base of his cock and Taehyung was gone too, husky groan falling from his lips, slamming his hips up and locking his legs, shooting jerks of cum into the condom, aftershocks causing you to lose hold on your knees, moan pitching higher as you slipped down on his throbbing length, trapped on it because Taehyung wasn’t going to lower you until he was done, the head pulsing inside you, squeezed out by your shivering walls.
“T… Tae… the picture…”
“Ah… yeah… hold on… lay down for me…”
He wasn’t going to let you leave without his mark anyway.
“Serious?”
“Deadly.”
You laid back against the pillows, spent, holding your phone, Taehyung straddling your chest and stroking his slick cock, plops of cum and lube falling onto your chest, messy dark hair curling around his handsome face. You could see the purple-red head peek out from between his fingers, hear the steady slapping as he pumped it back to full hardness.
“Alright, let’s see.”
Your chest was rattling but you raised your phone, bringing up the picture as Taehyung gripped the base of his cock, lifting it up slightly to put it in position. You squinted at the screen, looking from the photo dick to the real one. Of course. He was definitely bigger, a little thicker, but strangely, the color was almost the same. Was that lightning or similar skin tone? Or perhaps men with really nice dicks just happened to have Taehyung’s tan complexion?
You wouldn’t question it if it was true.
“You’re bigger,” you sighed, tossing your phone aside.
Taehyung smirked proudly. “What a surprise.”
“We all knew that, even before I saw it.”
He chuckled, going back to fisting his cock. “That’s because Jimin has a big mouth and likes to spread rumors.”
“You like that he spends rumors.”
Taehyung shrugged, but his sly expression wouldn’t be hidden even as he shook his head to cover part of his face with his long brown hair, curtaining half of it with darkness, teasing and effortlessly sexy.
“Ready?”
“Mhm, do it.”
You raised yourself onto your elbows, smiling wide, watching his breathing shallow and his eyes close, losing himself in it, faster and tighter, the wetness audible, strong thighs shuddering at your sides. Then he sucked in a breath, hissing your name and tipping forward, painting viscous white strings onto your collarbones and tits, pushing his shuddering cock up and down to spread it out, your clavicle now sticky and covered in his strong scent.
Taehyung ticked his head, lips in a devil’s smile, chest heaving with exertion.
“Your cum necklace is extra pretty today. Take a selfie for me so I can jack off to your cute face later.”
-
jeon jungkook.
“Jungkook?”
Jeon Jungkook shrieked your name like you were Michael Myers and he was Jamie Lee Curtis, flinging himself onto his computer monitor and mashing the power button to turn it off, his long purple hair flying everywhere, brown orbs like saucers, entire body shaking so bad that even his eyebrow piercing was vibrating.
He froze like that.
You blinked at him from the doorframe of his rented studio room, one hand on the knob and the other holding up your phone like a kitchen knife.
His leather bomber jacket was hung over the back of his rolling chair. The chair was currently slowly sliding across the floor, away from him and his panic. Jungkook was wearing a sleeveless black shirt and loose black jeans.
For a guy scared shitless, his pants were pitching a very impressive tent.
Had he been watching porn?
“Er… I knocked…?” you said slowly, pointing to the door. “Do you not hear me?”
“Um, uh, n-no,” Jungkook sputtered, looking you up and down. “No, I d-didn’t.”
“I said I was coming by today. Via text?”
“Was that today?” he echoed hollowly like a ghost in a shell, the end of his question pitching to a higher octave. He coughed and cleared his throat. “Ah. Sorry. I think I f… forgot…” He was not looking at your face, instead staring at your thighs and your shorts, tight and tiny, shredded black denim paired with a loose, long-sleeved black top that read in bold, white, graphic, letters...
REALITY SUCKS.
You pointed to the turned-off monitor.
"Were you watching porn?" you asked cheerfully.
Jungkook's ears turned red.
"Yes," he blurted.
Silence.
A bird cawed outside.
You nodded, closing the door. You tilted your head and locked it, just in case, before waltzing into Jungkook's film studio space, bouncing on the heels of your large black sneakers. "If you're gonna watch porn, you should lock the door. What were you watching? Is it lesbian porn again? Can I–?"
You reached over to turn the screen back on and Jungkook's tattooed hand shot out and grabbed your wrist, yanking you away from it and to him. You blinked rapidly, confused at his tight grip.
"N-No, you can't see. You can't," he sputtered, pinning you against his hard body.
You frowned, annoyed. "Why not? I like porn." You squirmed against him, but he sandwiched you between his forearms, forcing you to look up and face him, thinning your mouth into a line. He gulped, eyes shifting, holding your body against his. His lower lip trembled, mole underneath bouncing with his uncertainty.
"I... It wasn't porn..."
You stopped struggling, confused. "Huh?"
Those dark chocolate eyes found yours, looking guilty.
"I was looking at your pictures."
You blinked rapidly. "What?"
"You know... the ones I take of you sometimes... You said it was okay..."
Ah, yes. Jungkook liked to take pictures of you. He had mumbled that it was because he needed practice and, later in bed, he admitted it was because he considered you his muse, an inspiration of sorts, so would it be okay if, maybe, you just turned a little and laid in his covers just like... like that, yeah, could he take maybe one photo?
"Sure, knock yourself out, dude."
A bit later, far too late, you had realized that had been maybe too chill of a response, but Jungkook seemed to prefer that and he acted less awkward about it every other time he asked to take a picture. They weren't usually dirty pictures. Although you were naked in some of them, they weren't quite inappropriate, every single one framed with delicate, well-thought-out composition. You always sighed and told him he made you look better than you actually were.
Jungkook always insisted you were consistently beautiful.
You pointed between your bodies.
"Were you gonna get off to them or something?" you cheerily inquired, bumping against his pitched denim tent.
"N-No!"
His ears turned scarlet and he jerked sideways, but you held onto him, hands firmly on his hips, not letting him twist away. He quickly covered his ears and pouted at you.
"I was... I just missed you."
You smiled, squeezing his ass. "I missed you too, Jungkook."
Your tone was soft, gentle. He stilled and lowered his hands, lips parting at your words, slightly surprised, incredibly adorable.
His dick twitched in his pants and jabbed your crotch.
A pause.
Jungkook's eyes shifted to the side, mumbling under his breath. "And, yeah, okay, I got horny, but that's only because it's you..."
"That's great, since I definitely wanted to look at your dick as soon as possible!"
His eyes went wide.
You smiled widely.
Then he said something unexpected.
"Ow."
You looked down and backed up as Jungkook frowned and reached down to shift his rock-hard length in his pants, sighing in relief.
"Zipper was killing me..." he grumbled, running a hand through his purple hair.
"We should just take it off then."
"Pardon, we should wha–ah!"
You grabbed fistfuls of his black top and yanked it up and over his head, causing Jungkook to sputter in confusion, throwing his hands up as you unsheathed his muscular torso, leaning in, breathing on his skin, leaving him to untangle himself as your lips closed onto his dark nipple, tongue teasing the small nub.
"Ah, fuck!"
You lifted your lips, tongue still extended, looking up to see him flinging the shirt aside, his long purple hair messy and wild, tattooed arm and un-inked arm lifting, pushing his hair away from his face, his chest rising to your wet muscle, gasping. You had a clear view of that cute little mole under his lower lip, trembling with pleasure before Jungkook looked down at you, hazy chocolate orbs fanned by black lashes, breathing hard.
You ticked an eyebrow, licking slow circles, lips closing in again, sucking daintily.
He bit his lip and let it slowly tease out while you simultaneously teased him, your name leaving his lips in a low moan. You danced your fingertips up his thigh, nail tracing the seams of his jeans, kissing across his chest, his eyes following you, hips rocking into your touch, following your pace, letting you command it. His head tipped back as you kissed down his abs, whimpering with want, curling his fingers into fists.
Jungkook always made you feel like you were touching him for the first time.
"You're not a virgin?"
"No?" Jungkook had repeated after the first time you had fucked him, sounding confused. "I'm just like this? Is that bad?"
"W... well... no, and now that I think about it, you were suspiciously good..."
"You didn't like it?"
You had turned to look at him and, fuck, the way he looked at you, so cute and innocent, uh oh, and then the slightest hint of an open-mouthed smirk dancing on those shapely pink lips, reminding you of someone else.
"Namjoon-hyung said that's what you were into. Is he wrong?"
Voice so deep and so smooth, gliding over you like butter.
You almost hastily defended yourself but one look into those roguish, yet genuine, chocolate eyes and you couldn't lie.
"But... you should enjoy yourself too..."
Jungkook had grinned, endearing and heart-thuddingly handsome. "I do. I told you, this is how I am. You're just my type."
"And what's that?'"
He had pinned you back onto the bed, leaning in.
"Hot and horny."
Turns out.
Seemed to be a running theme with all eight of you.
Right now, his pants were falling and you were sliding up as your hand was sliding down, shushing him quietly, your other hand dancing up his neck and pulling his head down.
"Someone's gonna hear you," you whispered to his open lips, tone and touch implying you didn't give a shit who was listening, wrapping your fingers around his stiff cock the second he pushed his black boxer briefs down, his shivering moan tickling your cheek. His right hand came up to cradle your head and lean it against his, begging whines for you to move, pairing it with an irresistible, husky hiss of your name.
"Please..."
He liked it tight and he liked it rough, liked the way you could lock your fingers and keep that nearly suffocating pace, closing his eyes with a flutter and moaning into your skin, curtaining you with purple, his grip in your hair tightening as you built that speed, filling the rented studio with his silvery, erotic cries.
"Someone out there is going to think you're watching porn," you teased, nudging him with your nose, looping a finger back to smear the pre-cum over the swollen head. He bucked his hips into your hold, lips pressed to your cheek, intoxicated groan warming your skin.
"Kiss me and breathe into my mouth..."
You couldn't say no, not with his voice so soft and pleading like that, not with that edge of nervousness. Fuck, the way Jungkook succumbed to your kiss, uncontrollable tremors taking over his shoulders, hot taut skin twitching in your palm indicating he was close, and you almost broke away to say that he shouldn't cum like this, it'll be messy and get on the floor, but he grabbed your face and didn't let you go, whimpering in his throat, wordlessly telling you to do it, exhale into his throat and he groaned in his chest, long, drawn-out, consumed by lust, and maybe it was bad, but you loved it, loved the way he wanted it so bad, wanted you to push the air out of his lungs and suffocate his pulsating cock with your grip, pre-cum leaking between your fingers, finally pulling back and gasping, his lashes fluttering helplessly.
"G-Gonna cum, f-fuck!"
You had to think fast, looking down for a moment and feeling his cock jerk in your hand, swiftly switching to cupping the dark red head, thick white cum suddenly spurting your palm, Jungkook burying his face into your hair to muffle his wail, your scalp hot with his released exhale and your hand covered in his heated release.
You breathed in, smirking at the scent of dirty gratification.
"Jungkook..."
He whined softly, hips quivering as you covered his jerking length with your cum-covered hand, spreading it all over and getting him hard again.
"There's this picture..."
"Mmm, yeah, the h-hyungs told me... don't stop..."
You swung your hips from side to side, free hand running down his chest, your eyes roaming his toned body, his tattooed arm still hovering over your head, long fingers tangled in your hair still, squatting down and opening your mouth, tongue dancing out and licking your hand and the side of his purple-red length, wet sloppy kisses, slurping up his cum and moaning on the throbbing head, making sure that he could feel the sinful heat.
"Give me... oooh, fuck, give me your phone..."
Your hand left his abs reluctantly, tugging your phone out of your ass pocket and holding it up for him as your mouth closed around his cock, swallowing it all, eyes closing, cramming all of him until the head hit your inner throat and your lips pressed against his crotch, knees on the tile floor, thighs spread, hands poised in the air, unable to breathe.
Click.
You cracked open one eye to see Jungkook holding your phone above your head, teasing smirk on his shapely lips, mole winking at you.
“For me?” he asked, not quite innocent.
It was the first time Jungkook had taken an actual dirty picture.
You shrugged as if to say, sure, pulling back as he turned the phone around, the dick in question on the screen. You eased off his length, licking it clean, bringing up your wet hand covered in his cum, popping your lips off the engorged tip and sliding your fingers in your wet lips, tongue wriggling between your fingers, inspecting the two dicks. Jungkook was still hard – so hard that his cock was sticking straight out, almost mimicking the photo. You had to crouch a little more, tilting your head and placing your fingertips on his balls, raising his dick a little on the back of your hand, smearing saliva and pre-cum on your skin.
Yon continued to lick, grazing the underside of his length with your tongue and then pulling back, eyes going from the photo to the real thing.
Jungkook moaned above you, clutching your phone tightly, knuckles white under black tattoos.
Hm.
You tilted your head.
One way.
Then the other.
Hmmm?
Hmmmmmmm.
“W… What?” Jungkook stuttered above you.
You pursed your lips at the tip of his cock, swiping your tongue over it and sucking off the pre-cum. He gasped, hips shaking, threatening to shove it into your lips.
“It doesn’t look like your dick at all.”
“What?” He sounded startled.
You pointed with your dry hand. “The shape is a little off, you’re longer and slightly bigger, and the color is different.” You sighed, whooshing hot air over his soaked, taut skin, Jungkook whimpering. You squinted slightly.
“Still…”
You tapped your lips with his cock, thinking.
“I think he wears the same underwear brand as you.”
“He does?” Jungkook squeaked, spinning the phone around and blinking at it.
You shrugged. “And for some reason, the position of his hips reminds me of you. I don’t know why…”
He chewed his lower lip, staring at the phone.
“Oh well.”
You stood up abruptly at your words and plucked the phone out of his hand, putting it on his desk.
“If it’s not you, it’s not you. Let’s fuck.”
Jungkook yelped as you grabbed the bottom of your shirt and began stripping off your clothes.
That was his reaction that one time you lost strip poker to Kim Seokjin and him at that one party, not that your cared because you didn’t bother learning the rules. You had other priorities and they involved getting mostly naked and then pinning Seokjin down to make out with him as Jungkook gawked at the other side of the table, half-clothed, clutching his cards.
“I can… go…?” he had sputtered.
You surfaced from Seokjin’s plush lips, his hands around your bare waist, the taller man gasping for air, reeling from your kiss.
“I still have one more piece of clothing to go, Jungkook.”
Side of your lower lip between your teeth, cocking an eyebrow, swaying your panty-covered ass at those huge brown eyes.
“You can help, you know.”
Fun night.
His eyes were huge now too, your back against the wall and him rolling the condom down, lifting your leg and sliding into you, gasping at your tightness, leaning down to kiss you again, greedy and ravenous, his hips jerking upwards, forcing you on tiptoe. Your hands were on his shoulders, nails digging into that soft skin and strong muscle.
“F-Fuck me, Jungkook, mmm, fuck, yes…”
You didn’t really get to talk during that strip poker night because your mouth was full of Seokjin’s dick as Jungkook’s pounded you from behind, but it would be a crime to complain about such things.
You met your hips to his to deepen his thrust, enjoying his strength, powerful and steady, fucking you against the wall, wet slaps and soft moans filling the room between harsh kisses, lips swelling from the fervor, your ass even rhythmically smacking into the wall, but neither of you cared, your leg around his slim waist and his right arm wrapped around it, his fingers digging into your thigh, black tattoos and tan skin gleaming from sweat, his other hand clutching a fistful of your ass and ramming your drenched pussy down on his stiff cock, grinning at your soft cry of his name, staring into his eyes and not looking away, spellbound by chocolate orbs framed by wispy strands of purple.
“You always feel so fucking good…”
You pulsed around him, feeding the fire, wanton exhales mixing, dick pic forgotten.
-
“Hah…”
You rolled over, sighing loudly.
“Haaaaaaah…”
“You still fixated on that dick?” a deep, unimpressed voice said next to you.
You frowned and planted your phone with the inspirational dick on your face, praying for it to come to life and choke you.
“I never found out who it was…” you mumbled.
“Well, it is Saturday night. We can go crash a party and maybe you can find that dick!” exclaimed a joyful voice, poking your side. Your phone slid off your face and clattered to the floor. A cheerful hand covered in colorful clay rings waved at you and your gaze shifted to Jung Hoseok and his blond and pink hair. He was too cute and you were unable to help yourself as you looked at him, matching his heart-shaped smile.
“Nah,” you tutted. “If it’s not one of you guys… the dick isn’t worth it.”
You closed your eyes and sighed again, long and with longing.
“If it makes you feel better, we don’t know who it is either.”
You laughed hearing Kim Namjoon’s deep, serious voice. “How would you guys find out?”
“I know a lot of things,” Park Jimin’s angelic, light voice chirped.
“Too many things,” Kim Taehyung’s baritone voice remarked coolly.
“Are you gonna eat that slice of pizza, Jungkook?”
“Yeah, hyung, I am, no, stop–”
“Give Seokjinnie-hyung a bite!”
“Over my dead body!”
“Then you’re dead to me, boy! Respect your elders!”
You heard some slapping and flailing about, but didn’t open your eyes.
“He’s probably not a virgin anyway. Virgins don’t snap pics like that on strangers’ phones.”
You cracked an eye open and narrowed it at the form laying on the ground beside you. Min Yoongi was messing with his phone. His head was on a huge pillow that he wasn’t sharing. He seemed to notice your glare and turned his head to raise a lazy eyebrow at you, cat-like eyes shrouded by black hair.
“Isn’t that what you’re into?” he taunted.
Your eye twitched.
You growled, sitting up. “I’m not into virgins, damnnit! I just like listening to people who are knowledgeable about their interests, like how Namjoon goes on about human philosophy, and how Seokjin never shuts up about MapleStory, and like how you talk about music theory. Just because I don’t understand right away doesn’t mean I don’t try,” you snapped, prodding Yoongi’s firm pecs through his t-shirt. He didn’t move, completely unbothered as you continued your tirade. “I don’t know anything about TikTok, but I like listening to Hoseok talk about the latest dance and fashion trends. Jimin’s the only reason I don’t make an ass of myself at parties because he knows everything about everyone so I don’t accidentally sit in a taken person’s lap and cause trouble. Taehyung’s always following that animal rescue Instagram and giving me cool facts about all these different creatures. Jungkook can go on for hours about cameras. I still don’t think I even know how to work the aperture function on DSLRs, but as long as he will continue to explain, I’ll listen.”
You sucked in a deep breath and seethed.
“So what’s the difference?”
“What?” you scowled.
Yoongi shrugged casually.
“Why do you keep chasing dorks with glasses struggling to get stupid graduate degrees when the people you spend the most time with are here with you right now, ready to fuck you at any time?”
“That’s–”
Your words died in your throat, Yoongi’s words finally sinking in.
Silence.
“Hyung, I’m struggling to get a grad degree…” Namjoon cut in, but the black-haired man on the floor lifted a finger and sliced the air, quieting him instantly. Yoongi was watching you carefully, head tilting at your frozen state. Your brain seemed to have ceased function. His lips curved into a slow, open-mouthed smirk.
Yoongi dropped the bomb on you.
“Didn’t you think it was a bit suspicious that the dick had elements from all of ours, but never quite matched up?”
W… What?
Your head whipped to your fallen phone and you scrambled with it, bringing up the dick pic again. The photo showed up at the party with the wet t-shirt contest. Your phone has disappeared for two hours during said party. Everyone was drunk. No. Everyone had gotten drunk after your phone had mysteriously been found and returned to you. You spent the night in various laps doing various naughty things, not bothering to check your phone after retrieving it, leaving it as a later you problem. You filed through your memories, recalling their faces as you showed each and every one of them the photo.
Hold on.
“Didn’t you think it was a bit weird, almost as if…”
They weren’t as weirded out as one might be, seeing some random dick on your phone.
As if…
“As if one of us is good at photo manipulation, perhaps,” Yoongi purred.
As if they had expected to see such a photo.
Click.
You whipped your head to the left and a whirlwind of dark purple hair went flying under the coffee table, hiding behind broad shoulders, chestnut brown hair, and full lips forming an ‘o’. At the same time, the realization hit you like a falling piano from the sky.
“Did you all…” you choked, mechanically jerking from face to face, Namjoon, Seokjin, Yoongi, Hoseok, Jimin, Taehyung, and lastly, back at Seokjin because Jungkook was cowering behind him, large brown doe eyes behind a massive shoulder. “D-Did you all…?”
No way.
“Did you all take a dick pic and Photoshop them together into one superdick photo and PLANT IT ON MY PHONE?!”
One look at those seven faces and…
YUP.
Taehyung laughed, loud and rich, nudging Namjoon with his elbow. “Told you she wouldn’t check the details of the photo and realize it was from an outside source.”
You started and swiped around. The file name was close enough to your camera photos’ file names, but upon closer inspection…
“Oh my God…”
“She’s very easily distracted by dick,” Hoseok chuckled, infectious grin on his face.
“I am not!”
“Wanna bet?”
“Jimin, do not whip out your dick.”
You heard your name being called softly and looked up, clutching your phone, still stunned and flabbergasted that you had been lusting after a fake dick that was a fuckin’ Megazord of the seven dicks currently surrounding you and those seven were the very dicks that tricked you!
On purpose!
For what?
FOR FUN!
(GG, no re)
They got you good.
Your irritation immediately dissipated when your eyes found those anxious chocolate ones, long purple strands curling around his cheek, curious open mouth with the small mole underneath barely visible.
“Are you mad?” Jungkook asked quietly, pink lips curving into an irresistible pout.
Oh.
Shit.
Before you could quickly say, no, of course not, Jungkook, it was funny, I’m not mad at all, you felt a dark presence by your shoulder, raspy chuckle by your ear, sending shivers down your spine, whispering your name, devious and smokey.
“Whose idea do you think it was?” Yoongi murmured.
You stared into chocolate eyes.
Innocent.
Or…?
Jungkook’s pout disappeared.
His dark eyebrow cocked, mischievous smirk gracing those irresistible lips. No, not just him. Lowered lids and midnight blue hair, smug expression with a dimple. Kim Namjoon. Lifted chin, looking down at you with a sheepish yet wicked smile on full lips. Kim Seokjin. The black head of hair leaning his chin on your shoulder, laugh like a seductive purr. Min Yoongi. Tilted head balanced on long fingers decorated with colorful rings and bracelets, sly heart-shaped smile. Jung Hoseok. Shit-eating grin fanned by red hair, bouncing a perfectly manicured eyebrow. Park Jimin. Long dark brown hair pulled back into a ponytail, spare strands framing a moody, handsome face with a glint of playful cunning. Kim Taehyung.
And then, Jeon Jungkook.
“The hyungs thought it was a great idea,” he drawled, silvery and sweet, looking extremely pleased with himself, running his tattooed hand through his purple hair, unquestionably guilty, but despairingly angelic in appearance.
These fucking…. Seven Kings of Duality!
You were positively fuming.
Silence.
An owl hooted outside the window.
“YOU PUNKS!”
You threw yourself over the coffee table and horny chaos ensued.
-
2021.09.01 - JK birthday drabble 2021.10.02 - Namjoon birthday drabble
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yoonpobs · 4 months ago
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with you | ksj | m
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marrying your childhood best friend was not the love story that most painted it to be. you knew that better than anyone else.
PAIRING. kim seokjin x reader
GENRE. marriage!au, divorce!au, childhood friends2lovers!au, angst, fluff, smut
WARNINGS. dilf jin, mentions of divorce (it's literally the plot😭), marriage problems, jin is kind of an asshole (who redeems himself!!!-ish), slight jealousy, soft sex, crying during sex, oral (f receiving), bigdick!jin, oc is a crybaby who tries not to cry 99.9% of this fic
WORDS. 22.1k
NOTE. it's here!!!!! I've been working on this fic for a while and im somewhat pleased with how it turned out!!!! i apologise for any errors/edit mistakes bc I run through it on my own so I may overlook some grammar issues etc ...
anywho, I hope you enjoy this fic!!!! as always - my asks are open to let me know how you felt about this fic <3
────────────── ⋆✩⋆ ──────────────
“What is this?” he blinks.
“Divorce papers,” you say softly, smoothing out the surface while you avoid his eyes.
“You want,” he says slowly, eyebrows furrowing as he attempts to process your words. “You want a … divorce?”
You hate that he sounds so nonchalant like you weren’t mulling over this decision for the past three months as you found yourself losing hope in your marriage with each passing day. But for as long as you’ve known Jin, he’s always been like this. A little hard to understand, straightforward but never intentionally malicious. He just somehow ended up hurting people without him realising it.
“Yes,” you say.
“What about Jiho?”
The reminder of your son makes your heart drop to the pit of your stomach, but you were prepared for this question. In fact, your son was the only thing that made you hesitate your decision for another month because divorces were messy and even if Jiho was just four years old and probably too young to understand—he was perceptive and you didn’t want to put him through the taxing emotions of having his parents go through a divorce.
But you were exhausted of fighting alone and returning to a home that feels more isolating than welcoming.
“We’ll share custody,” you narrate the exact words you’ve been mulling over for the past few months, even if it breaks your heart to say them.
“What prompted this?” It hurts even more when Jin flips through the papers as he would with any other of his business contracts, and it’s a harsh reminder that your marriage was reaching an invincible expiry date that you wanted to ignore.
“We …” you hesitate, fingers clutching the fabric of your dress as you purse your lips. Was there a reason to justify your decision anymore, when you’ve fought tooth and nail for the past four months to be heard? To be seen as someone who wasn’t just his wife on paper but a person to be nurtured? You force yourself to look ahead, even when Jin raises an eyebrow at your silence. You settle for a soft response instead. “I think it’s for the best.”
Jin opens his mouth to say something but decides against it before he slides the papers towards him, and you half-expect him to sign it and tell you to leave. The thought only makes your heart shatter even more—because four years of marriage, a child—gone, just like that.
But he doesn’t. Instead, he offers you a curt nod with a look you can’t quite decipher.
“I’ll get back to you,” he says.
You blink, especially when he pushes himself off his desk and extends a hand towards you as if he’d expected you to grab it. The gesture doesn’t fit in with the context of the conversation, much less the emotions that thrash wildly in your heart.
“What are you doing?” you whisper.
“Lunch,” he says, “I haven’t had it with you in a while.”
────────────── ⋆✩⋆ ──────────────
“That took a while,” Taehyung points out when you clamber back into your office.
“I had lunch,” you respond curtly as you hang your jacket on the coat hanger while you attempt to ease the pressing headache between your temples.
“Alone?” He raises a brow.
“With Jin.”
Taehyung’s eyes widen as you plop onto the empty seat next to him. Your son’s fidgeting in his lap as your assistant types away at his laptop, and you’re absolutely exhausted so you extend your arms towards Jiho, who immediately turns to you with a toothy grin and leaps off Taehyung’s lap.
“Hi baby,” you press a kiss to his cheek, immediately seeking warmth in your son’s chubby body.
“Hi mama,” he returns, pressing a plush cheek into your chest when you squeeze him.
You try to keep your tears at bay, even if it’s just having your son in your arms. He doesn’t know the day you had or the meal you shared with his father. The man you married and decided to have a child with. Jiho doesn’t know that it’s over—and it hurts. It hurts because he deserved a family filled with love.
“How did it go?” Taehyung asks tentatively, swirling in his chair until he’s facing you.
You know he’s concerned. He was probably the person that received the news with the most shock, granted he was currently the only person that knew besides Jin. Taehyung has been your assistant before you relocated to this larger office and before your business set its course, and even when you and Jin were just dating. So, he knows—he knows how hard you’ve tried and when you decided that it was over.
“He didn’t even try,” you croak, eyes fluttering shut as you attempt to level your breathing to not alarm your son, “Just took the papers and said he’d get back to me.”
“He didn’t sign it?” Taehyung asks in slight surprise.
“No,” you murmur, peering down to see your son fiddling with a ribbon that sticks out your dress, “I didn’t want to ask why.”
Taehyung purses his lips before he reaches out to squeeze your available hand. The gesture is enough to remind you of what you just did—the conversation you just had with Jin, and it’s enough for your entire facade to go crumbling again.
But you don’t cry because your son is unaware of the conflict that exists between you and his father, you don’t cry because one of you needed to be strong and it had to be you.
“I’m sorry.” His apology is sincere but frankly, useless. But you don’t tell him that even if that’s all that plagues your mind. You know Taehyung knows this too, but you suppose it’s the best either of you can offer right now.
“Don’t be,” you laugh humourlessly, “You’re not the one that failed in this marriage.”
“You didn’t fail, ____,” he says sternly, “It just—some things don’t work out.”
Your lips wobble again, looking up so your son doesn’t spot your tears.
“I thought we would,” you croak, “I tried. I tried—so hard. But it still wasn’t enough.”
Taehyung stays silent, and your son is mumbling something under his breath. When you peer down, his smile remains innocent and oblivious to the world that’s falling apart right in front of his eyes.
“Mama, look,” he squeals as he lifts up an arm that he’s somehow managed to scribble on, “Mama, daddy, me!”
Taehyung has to take Jiho when you excuse yourself to the bathroom.
────────────── ⋆✩⋆ ──────────────
“What do you mean he hasn’t signed it?” You hiss, holding the phone between your ear and your shoulder as you attempt to shove old documents into the shredder.
“He … hasn’t,” Jimin, Jin’s assistant, says lamely over the line as you feel your headache return.
“Jimin, you’re his assistant,” you remind him sternly, “It’s literally your job to make sure he gets shit done.”
“I know!” He exclaims before he’s sighing, “He’s just—he keeps putting it off. I really can’t do much, ____.”
You chuck the last bit of papers aside before you’re grabbing your phone from in-between your ear and shoulders before you’re leaning against a desk, pinching the bridge of your nose in irritation.
It’s been a week since you visited Jin at his office propositioning him with a divorce, yet, the papers remain vacant from his signature that solidified the termination of your legal union. You were more so irritated than hurt right now, purely because you wanted actual documents to present to your lawyer and your parents before you told them that you and Jin were getting a divorce.
It’s also been a week since Jin’s came home, and you’re partly thankful that he did that on his own because that was another painful conversation you weren’t quite ready to have. Not that he came home at an acceptable hour anyway. But it’s almost daunting at how the bed remains cool where he used to lay, even if he’d disappear hours before your awakening.
“Just,” you exhale, “Please get him to sign it, Jimin. I’m tired.”
You can hear some shuffling on the other end and you assume it’s him moving to another place with the way the office chatter gets distinctively quieter the longer time passes.
“Do you,” he starts, “do you really have to do this?”
You sigh, already bracing for his comment.
If Taehyung knew you and Jin before you got married, Jimin was the person that got the two of you together. The instigator that insisted that the feelings and mutual, and that the chance should be taken. You believed him ten years ago when you were younger and in high school, oblivious to what the future held. You wanted to resent him for how things out but you knew it was irrational. You would’ve fallen in love with Jin with or without Jimin’s intervention.
He was that easy to love.
The bitter reminder that the divorce seemed easy for him to accept, even without the signature, plagues your mind as you hear Jimin call your name once more.
“Do you think this was my first option?” you snap, and immediately the silence is tense. “I was backed into a corner, Jimin. There’s no point in Jin and I remaining married if—if nothing about our relationship feels like a marriage anymore.”
“What about Jiho?” he throws back the same question Jin posed at you when you first came to him with the divorce.
You grit your teeth, your heart inevitably clenching at the guilt that’s yet to subside. It only hurt more because you knew Jimin didn’t mean it to hurt you, but it did—it did because it wasn’t easy.
“I’m not taking him away from Jin,” you whisper, “I can’t—I would never do that.”
“You know that’s not what I meant,” Jimin says softly.
“I know,” you reply, equally as soft as your eyes dart to the ground, “I hate this, Jimin. I do. But I rather Jiho grow up with two parents who aren’t together than two parents who live together but not even talk.”
Jimin stays silent, and you know that he’s heavily contemplating his next set of words.
You beat him to it with a sigh.
“I’m sorry,” you mumble, “I didn’t mean to unload.”
“Please don’t apologise,” he says, “I just … have you tried speaking to Jin?”
You scoff bitterly at the suggestion, and you know that you shouldn’t be taking it out on Jimin, who’s both Jin’s assistant and your close friend—but the nudge to recall the times you’ve tried, tried so hard to patch things up by planning mini-dates that he rain checked more than enough times for you to want to try again—only leaves you feeling sour.
“He clearly doesn’t mind if he says he’ll get back to me,” you say bitterly.
“Have you considered that maybe he only said that because—”
At that moment, your intercom goes off and you briefly hear Taehyung’s static voice filter through the speaker.
“Hold on, Jimin,” you rush as you put your hand to the speaker to lean forward to press the intercom. “Tae?”
“You have an appointment,” he says slowly, and your eyebrows furrow at his odd tone.
“I do?” You say with a puzzled expression, “I don’t remember scheduling an appointment—”
“Well, this isn’t really an appointment,” he laughs tightly.
“Tae,” you frown, “What are you saying?”
“She’s already—”
And at impeccable timing, a rapt knock is delivered to your door as you further scrunch your eyebrows in confusion.
“Jimin, I need to go. I have a visitor,” you bring the phone back up to your ear as you begin heading towards the door.
“No worries,” he clips, “Take care, okay?” He says softly.
You mumble a word of gratitude before you’re hanging up, hand already reaching out to turn to the knob to greet your guest.
You’re still confused before you come face-to-face with them, but the moment the door opens as you plaster a smile to greet your guest—your grin immediately freezes as you spot the one person that you surely didn’t expect to visit your workplace on a weekend, let alone at all.
“E-Eomeonim,” you stutter, eyes briefing landing on Taehyung’s apologetic expression behind your guest's elegant posture.
“Myeoneuri,” she immediately beams, leaning forward to embrace you into a hug that you’re still too stunned to properly returned, and it’s not until she pulls back with furrowed brows that you return the gesture, still frozen in shock as you lean your head against her shoulder.
“What brings you here?” You ask, forcing a smile at the sudden grant of her presence as you shut the door behind you, immediately guiding her towards the empty couch as you head towards your cupboards to bring out the glasses for drinks.
“Ah,” she laughs, gently and polished as ever as you keep your head-trained over your shoulder to engage in eye contact as you pour her some water, “Can’t I visit my daughter-in-law?”
The term doesn’t fall on deaf ears and you force yourself to laugh, even if you know that the term wouldn’t be applicable for much longer. You feel like a fraud, inviting her into your office and offering her water as if you weren’t over at her son’s office a week ago with papers that would immediately terminate any relationship you had with him—or her. Legally, at least.
She was still your son's grandmother and overall, a lovely person.
You grew up with her right next to your house, being the second mother in your life especially when she used to house you on nights where your parents were out of town as you integrated with her two sons and their antics. She cooked for you and treated you like you were her own daughter. Those things didn’t go away just because you were divorcing Jin.
“Of course,” you smile softly as you pass her a glass with two hands, “It’s nice to see you.”
She chuckles politely before taking a sip and setting the glass onto the table, eyes travelling around your office as she takes in your interior.
She’s been here on a few occasions, but they’ve been sprawled out over the years so there have definitely been some changes from when she last came. She doesn’t visit often—to your office, at least—she never had a reason to. So it’s all the more startling and nerve-wracking when she appeared today, conveniently after you proposed a divorce she’s yet to know about.
“I was thinking about you,” she says softly, peering up through her lashes as you gulp, fingers shaking ever so slightly when you take a sip of your drink yourself.
“You’re always free to visit, eomeonim,” you return politely, bowing your head.
She scoffs playfully, waving you off as she leans backwards into your plush couch.
“Don’t be so stiff with me, ____,” she teases, “I’ve changed your diapers.”
You flush at the reminder, and it’s both in fondness and in relative hurt because your family and hers were tight-knit from the very beginning. Your mother and she were best friends even before the two of you were born, and it’s only natural that their children ended up becoming friends. It was always a running joke that they’d hope you and Jin would fall in love and marry—and when it happened, the both of them were ecstatic.
It wasn’t as if they planned it, but fate worked out funnily sometimes. Even when you dated other people in the midst of unsure feelings in high school, you always found yourself returning to Jin. Whether it be in the form of comfort, or a laugh, or just a shoulder to lean on—you always found yourself on the front of his porch, eagerly waiting for another moment with him.
“I know,” you sigh with a small smile, “It’s crazy how long it’s been.”
“Thirty-two years,” she reminds.
You exhale, remember that you were in fact thirty-two this year. The thought that settles is one that is intrusive and annoying, purely because you couldn’t go a moment without remembering the divorce. Your age is another bitter reminder that you’ve really hit the mark with it, essentially starting over when you and Jin promised each other forever.
You take another sip to keep your tears behind.
“Anyway,” she continues as she rests her eyes on you. Her gaze is concerned and you’re stuttering, wondering if you were that obvious—if your face held all your emotions or if she was just that observant. When she speaks, you brace yourself for the worst. “I’ve been trying to contact that son of mine but he keeps sending me to his darned assistant.”
You relax ever so slightly as your lips twitch in a smile.
“Jiminie?” You ask amusedly.
“When he’s getting in the way of talking to my son, he’s a darned assistant,” she huffs, crossing her arms across her chest as you laugh.
“Even now, they’re inseparable,” you comment mindlessly, remembering all the times they used to get into trouble together in high school.
“For the wrong reasons,” she sighs, “That’s why I’m here, actually.”
You raise a brow, “Oh?”
“Seokjung’s planning on proposing,” she informs with an excited grin as your eyes widen.
“Oh my God,” you breath, equally as pleased to hear the news, “Finally? I’m so happy for him and Ah-reum.”
Your mother-in-law sighs wistfully as she smiles tenderly at you, reaching a hand out to squeeze yours as her eyes turn solemn.
“I am too,” she says softly, “My two son’s—Gosh.”
Your hand stiffens under her touch, but you don’t make an effort to correct her. She looks far too happy and emotional at the thought itself that you don’t have the heart to ruin that dream for her. You swallow the lump in your throat and the visual of the divorce papers that plague your mind as you offer a weak smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes.
“Yeah,” you say breathlessly, “I’m really happy for Seokjung.”
She nods, smiling at you before squeezing your hand again.
“I wanted to let you know myself,” she says, “I was meant to tell Jin but clearly, he’s caught up in whatever work he has,” she rolls her eyes before shooting you a pointed stare. “Make sure you make time for each other, even if he’s busy. That boy always drowns himself in work.”
Your face falls for a split second, but you immediately correct it when you realise the look of concern that marks her face.
You know her comment was made in good faith, she had no idea of your impending divorce … did she? But despite her voice mulling slightly under a whisper, you find that your heart betrays your blank face when it clenches. You should’ve made time for each other. Even if he was busy. You tried—and you failed.
“O-Of course,” you say, squeezing her hand in return.
“Make sure that the three of you spend time together,” she says softly, and you’re terrified that she knows when she mentions your son. “A relationship requires constant effort and dedication.”
“Of course,” you swallow, “I will.”
You hate yourself for lying to her, but you hope that she knows that you tried. That you really tried to pick up whatever that was lost—but some things would inevitably remain shattered.
“Tell Jin to take it easy,” she murmurs, “I worry for him sometimes.”
You nod your head mutely, agreeing silently.
“I’m”—she chokes, suddenly teary as your eyes widen in alarm—“I’m really glad that you have each other.”
It’s another blow that you receive, but force yourself to smile through.
“Eomeonim …” you say quietly, the guilt nabbing away at your heart.
She waves you off, laughing softly before she’s swabbing gently under her eyes to rid of the tears. And as always, she remains stunning as ever—the stark features of Jin apparent on her face, and the resemblance only makes your heart clench even further.
“Your mother and I would always joke about having our kids get married,” she reminisces as you smile tightly at her. “We never thought it would actually happen—but you and Jin …” she trails off with a fond smile, “It made sense. Like it was always meant to happen.”
You can’t take it anymore, but you weren’t allowed to pick your battles this time. You swallow the lump in your throat and hold her hand a little tighter as if an apology was worthy enough to be traced into the wrinkles of her palm. For now, this was all you could offer.
“Thank you, eomeonim,” you whisper, and it’s more than just the words she’s said, but how she’s treated you up until now. An apology also rests on your tongue, but that’s for a later date. When you and Jin no longer share the title of married.
“Don’t thank me,” she scoffs, “Thank you for making Jin’s life brighter. For bringing Jiho into this world.”
You swallow.
“Of course,” you smile, “He’s made mine too.”
────────────── ⋆✩⋆ ──────────────
“You’re here,” Jimin blinks, opening the door to let you in as you give him a tight smile.
“I wish I wasn’t,” you mutter under your breath as the two of you walk side-by-side down a familiar hall.
“Listen—” he begins but you cut him off, already too tired to engage with him attempting to convince you otherwise on the divorce.
“I really can’t do this right now, Jimin,” you say quietly and he looks at you with an apologetic look that you ignore to save your heart from more tears. “I’m only here because Jin isn’t answering his mother’s damn calls.”
“He’s in the middle of an important business deal,” Jimin says weakly.
“When is he not?” You roll your eyes as you huff, feet clacking against the marble as you turn into a familiar corridor where your eyes rest on the plague with the name of your husband, a name that you’ve welcomed into your life and in your son's name—a name that you’ve grown up with. You push aside the ache in your heart as you reach towards the door to knock. “Listen, I know you’re his best friend and his assistant but … tell him to remember that his job isn’t the only important thing in his life, yeah?”
Jimin doesn’t say anything but waits with you, and you briefly hear the shuffling of feet from the other end. You can tell Jimin wants to say something with the way that he’s impatiently tapping his feet against the ground, and you don’t placate him like you usually do because you know that you weren’t ready to hear whatever he had to say.
“Jin’s—”
The door swings open, and it isn’t Jin that you see. It’s—
“Isa,” you smile tightly.
“____,” she exclaims, immediately trotting over in her heels as she towers over you, arms wrapping you into a hug that you don’t expect. When she pulls away, you see her bright teeth in between her red lips. “You’re glowing! Are you pregnant?”
You shoot her a blank look, and you feel Jimin’s eyes widen.
“I’m not,” you say dryly.
“Oh,” she blinks, “Could’ve sworn you were,” she says off-handedly before she moves out the way, only for Jin to appear behind her with a vacant expression on his face, eyes immediately falling onto your unimpressed figure.
“____?” He furrows his eyebrows, “What are you doing here?”
You push past Isa, who you briefly see from the corner of your eye, press two rather friendly kisses onto your husband—well, soon to be ex-husbands—cheeks. She’s always done that, claiming that it was from her French roots even if you knew deep down that she had the hots for her husband. You don’t want to know why she’s here, appropriately right when you and Jin were in the middle of a divorce. Unless she’s representing him as his lawyer, you didn’t want to humour the thought.
“Your mother says you aren’t answering her,” you don’t spare him another glance, or Jimin, who is all but offering you a timid smile right before he shuts the door to the office, leaving you and Jin alone.
“I’ve been busy,” he replies.
“You couldn’t even just send a damn text to your own mother?” you ask irritatedly as you plop into a seat in front of his desk.
“I had Jimin do it,” he says with a frown.
You roll your eyes, bitter that you had to be here—bitter about the divorce—bitter about gorgeous Isa who just left his office. You were bitter about everything, and now you were here, with your soon-to-be ex-husband.
“Really, Jin,” you deadpan, “You couldn’t even spare two seconds to let your mom know that you were—I don’t know—alive?”
He sighs as if you were pointing out irrational facts and not attempting to get him to do things himself for once. To maintain relationships with people without a damn middleman. You were a victim once, and you sure as hell wouldn’t let his mom suffer the same painful fate as you did.
“It’s been hectic at the office,” he says curtly, “I did eventually get back to her.”
“Yeah,” you scoff, “After she visited me at my office.”
“She visited you?” he furrows his brows.
You roll your eyes, “It doesn’t matter. She told me that your brother is planning on proposing and she’s expecting us to be there at the engagement party.”
“I know,” he sighs, “I don’t think I can make it.”
You still.
“What?”
“The investors planned for a meeting that same week and I—”
“He’s your brother,” you splutter in disbelief, rage slowly assimilating in your blood when Jin shoots you with another blank look that you’ve grown to resent, especially recently.
“I can’t do anything about the investors, ____,” he frowns.
“You’re the CEO!” you balk, “You call the shots. You literally make the rules. He’s getting engaged and you can’t even try to make it?”
His brows turn downwards at your harsh tone, but you were unbothered. The disbelief that marks your face is reflective of how your heart slowly burns in anger, the way that your fists clench by your side. Even now, as you attempt to knock some sense of rationality into Jin—you find yourself exhausted. It’s because—this—is familiar. It’s the same routine you found yourself fighting against, now only applied to his direct family. If you weren’t considered that.
“They’re flying in from the States,” he says pointedly.
“And that matters more than your brother because?” You scoff, narrowing your eyes at him, “Don’t be fucking selfish, Seokjin.”
You don’t think you’ve referred to him as his full name in years. Even before the two of you dated. You always called him Jin because it was more intimate that way. Only business associates that he was professional with called him Seokjin. It was an unspoken rule that Seokjin was the persona he adapted with people that he needed on his side, not people he wanted by his side.
You’re too busy seething to see the way his face drops ever so slightly, but he’s quick to correct himself when he purses his lips at you.
“I’m at crossroads, ____,” he snaps, “On one hand, it’s my brother who I’m going to disappoint, or—it’s the ten investors that are eager on investing in this company. I can’t win—and right now, I need them on my side.”
“I can’t believe that you actually need to choose who’s more important right now,” you laugh humourlessly, eyes meeting his for a split second as you frown. “It’s your family, Seokjin. It’ll always be your family. You choose your family—you—you choose the people you love.”
Your words are venomous and purposeful when you spit at him, immediately pushing yourself off the seat. Your words refer to more than his brother, or his mother. It’s personal—and it hurts. You didn’t want him to see you cry, you don’t think he’d care anyway.
“Wait,” he sighs, following you until he’s at your door, hand blocking you from leaving, “I …”
You turn around, eyes fluttering shut as you even out your breathing. When you open them, it’s intuitive for you to believe that you were able to read him, especially after a decade of being together—but you can’t. Your eyes are blurred with more than just your fatigue, but it’s disappointment too.
“What?” you sigh, “I don’t—I don’t care what you do Seokjin. But just know that when you’re closing whatever damned business deal you have for profits—your family is missing you.”
You turn to leave, not expecting him to do anything further than where you’ve left it at—but his hand reaches for your shoulder to stop you, your body tensing at his touch that you haven’t felt in a long time.
“I’ll,” he begins, nibbling on his lip when you raise a brow at him. It’s the most you’ve gotten out from him in a long time, but it’s not enough for you to read what the hell is going on in his mind. “I’ll be there.”
You roll your eyes, “Whatever. I’ll believe it when I see it happen.”
You go to push his hand off but his grip remains firm on your shoulder as he furrows his brows at you.
“We’ll go together,” he says.
You blink.
“I can go there myself,” you clip back curtly.
“They don’t know,” he blinks, “Right?”
He’s talking about the divorce.
Your body stills under his grip as you scowl.
“Of course they don’t,” you snap, “I won’t do that to your mom,” you say softly, “Not now.”
He doesn’t ask you to elaborate, even when your eyes turn sad as they dart to the floor.
“Then we’ll go together,” he says simply, “It’s easier that way.”
You don’t argue anymore because your mind just recalls the conversation you shared with his mother, the woman who’s simultaneously raised you along with your own mother. The woman you’ve shared fond memories with, and the woman whose heart you were inevitably going to break with the news of the divorce.
“Fine,” you sigh, finally shrugging off his hand as you turn towards the door to finally leave.
The door opens, and you’re already halfway out when his voice interrupts you.
“Your dress,” he says softly.
You stop, turning your head slowly as you raise a brow.
“… my dress?” You look down at your attire and you note that it’s a simple knee-length dress that you’ve had for years. It was strapless, but casual enough for you to wear on a daily basis—and definitely nothing noteworthy about it.
“You wore it during our honeymoon,” he states as your body locks at the mention of the memory.
You don’t even remember if you did—so you can’t confirm whether or not he was pulling your leg. But the look that Jin sends you is … you can’t quite put a word to it but it looks soft. Gentle, almost fond. But it goes as quick as it comes before he’s offering you a small smile.
“I don’t remember,” you say bluntly.
His face remains blank, even if there’s a slight drop at his lips.
“Well,” he clears his throat before he steps out of the way to make space for your departure, “You look beautiful.”
The compliment steals your breath away, not because he’s never said it before but because it’s unexpected. It’s unexpected because you were divorcing him, and you haven’t heard those words leave his lips in a long time—directed to you, at least. You’re breathless because your heart is ramming against your chest, and there’s a painful feeling lingering.
You also remember the woman that’s left his office. You know it’s irrational for you to feel this way when you were the one that suggested the divorce. But it’s only proof at his options, especially when he was … he was him.
It’s hope—but you’re not an idiot to allow yourself to burn twice.
“I,” you croak, shaking your head as you manage a tight nod, “Thank you.”
When you leave, you have to force your tears back—without sparing another glance at Jin. When Jimin passes by you, he knows well enough not to ask.
────────────── ⋆✩⋆ ──────────────
“Have you got everything?” Taehyung asks, helping you with the bag filled with Jiho’s things as you snort at his overeagerness of getting you out of the office.
“Yes, Tae, I have,” you say with an amused grin. “If I didn’t know better I’d think you actually cared about my well-being.”
He gasps with a faux sense of offence as he places a hand on his chest, shooting you a look that you roll your eyes at.
“Of course I do!” He pouts, “My boss is getting the break she deserves,” he says before peering down to Jiho, who’s tiredly dozing off in your arms since it was in the wee hours of the morning, “But I’ll definitely miss this one.”
He pokes Jiho softly on the cheek but your son doesn’t even so budge. He’s exhausted, and you were too—but you were more used to staying up late packing last-minute than your son was so you brush his hair gently before placing a soft peck to the crown of his head.
You know Taehyung will miss Jiho, purely because you’ve been at the office more than your home through the past week. You couldn’t bear to return to a space that was void and only had the title of a home when it didn’t feel like it anymore. It was the most difficult explaining to Jiho, who sought his dad’s attention and you couldn’t give it to him. A business trip was the best you got.
“Thank you, by the way,” you smile gratefully at your assistant as the three of you are taken down to the lobby of your office via the lift.
“Don’t,” he says sternly as you giggle softly at his tone, “Thank you for leaving.”
“I knew it,” you narrow your eyes as you stick your tongue out at him. “You’re just happy that I’m gone.”
“It’s four days,” he reminds, “You need a longer break. You’ve been working non-stop.”
You know his jibe is stern despite his light tone, purely because he’s aware of your tendency to ignore your problems by overworking yourself. He’s seen you devote all your energy to reports and analysing data than acknowledge the impending shatter in your heart.
“That’s long enough,” you sigh, “Make sure you—”
“Yes,” he groans as the two of you finally reach the lobby, offering a polite smile toward the receptionist as he returns the gesture. “Did you forget that I’m your assistant? God forbid I’m incompetent.”
You sniff even if you don’t disagree. You didn’t hire him just because he was your friend, but because he’s proven himself over and over again on his capabilities, you needed someone that was lax enough to balance out your perfectionist tendencies but also precise with his work. Taehyung was the perfect mixture of that—so it made sense that he’s stuck with you since you first hired him.
“Call me if you need anything,” you remind as the two of you spot Jin’s car, a sleek range rover fit for the rather long travel. You let out an exhale at the prospect of being in a car with your own husband for the next four hours as you travel out to his family vacation home, but your son needed you—and he needed his dad, so you brace yourself.
“Yes,” he sighs, and you see Jin step out of the car, a t-shirt and sweats combo that you adored him in. You look away.
“Taehyung,” you hear Jin greet your assistant as the two males engage in a rather amicable bro-hug.
“Hey, hyung,” he smiles softly, “How are you?”
You busy yourself with making sure that Jiho’s head doesn’t slip off your shoulders, but you note that your son’s awake this time—sensing the presence of his father as he groggily flutters his eyes open to search for him.
“Could’ve been better,” Jin returns, though not unkindly as his eyes dart towards his son, eyes softening immediately when Jiho calls for him through a mumble.
“Daddy?” He mumbles, immediately shaking out of your grasp as he extends his arms to be held by Jin. You swallow, but you allow Jin to take him from you. He hasn’t seen your son in over a week, and you would never be the person that deprived him from his own blood.
“Jiho,” he whispers, “Tired, bud?”
Your son nods his head, immediately snuggling into the comfort of his father’s chest as you force yourself to look away, distracting your mind as you help Taehyung load your belongings into the boot of Jin’s car.
“Where were you?” Your son asks innocently, “Mama said trip.”
“Yeah,” Jin says breathlessly, eyes meeting yours for a split second as you look away. “Missed you so much.”
“We miss you too,” Jiho pouts, and you don’t correct him when he alludes to you either.
“You okay?” Taehyung whispers, hand clasping your shoulder as you blink away the heat behind your eyelids. It was too early to cry, and you’ve spent the past week crying at random intervals so you were tired of shedding tears.
“I’ll survive,” you smile tightly as Taehyung finally loads the last bag, closing the boot with a button before shuffling back to the curb where Jin continues to cradle your son in his arms.
You’ve known him before you could properly speak, and you intimately recognise the expression on his face. He looks … sad. And it’s the most emotion you’ve seen on his face ever since you approached him with the divorce. You know that the worst part of it all is that Jiho is caught in the crossfire, and what hurts the most is that you didn’t want him to be.
“Thank you,” Jin looks over to Taehyung before he reaches out to give him a semi-awkward hug due to the little boy in his arms. “For taking care of the both of them.”
You almost don’t catch it, but you do despite the hushed tone he takes. Your eyes dart to the ground before you head towards the door to the passenger seat, already too overwhelmed at the break of dawn.
You enter the car, taking a deep breath to even out your breathing and force your tears back. You hated yourself for crying so easily but you knew that it wasn’t just your crybaby tendencies, but it was the pent up emotions that you’ve suppressed for months resurfacing after months of repression. You catch the two men through the side-mirror in a rather intense conversation, though you don’t hear anything of what they’re saying. You know they’re not raising their voices because Jiho finds it peaceful enough to drift off into slumber.
When Taehyung catches your eyes through the side-mirror, he offers you a smile, one that you can’t quite read before he’s patting Jin on the back and giving him one last solemn look.
He’s quick to set Jiho at the backseat, fastening him in the booster seat and placing a soft pillow to support his neck. Your heart both grows fond and tighter when he places a soft kiss on your son’s forehead before carefully shutting the door, quickly entering the driver’s seat as he fastens himself in.
“There’s pineapple juice and gummies, by the way,” Jin breaks the silence as your eyes snap to his figure.
“Oh.”
“I know you don’t like travelling without them,” he mentions while he simultaneously setting up the GPS.
“I—thank you,” you reply softly, eyes dropping to the middle console, and in fact, spotting your favourite brand of pineapple juice and gummies sitting comfortably, waiting for your consumption.
You swallow, deciding against digging in immediately.
“My phone’s already connected to the Bluetooth so you can play any song,” he tells you, “The password’s the same.”
Your breath hitches. His password, the one he’s kept since college even if you’ve berated him for it on multiple occasions because of how predictable it was. Your anniversary date, the day when he first asked you to be his girlfriend. Even after you got married, he never changed it to your wedding anniversary date because he didn’t need to. He was that sentimental, proposing to you on the same day as when he first asked you out.
God, what was he doing to your heart?
You don’t say anything when you reach for his phone, and it’s like the universe is dead-set on reminding you of all the memories you shared with him when you spot the picture at the back of his clear phone case.
A polaroid of the both of you on your wedding night, face smushed with cake as the two of you double over in laughter.
Don’t cry, you tell yourself.
You type in the password when Jin finally ignites the engine, pulling out of the lobby as you finally start your four-hour journey. When you scroll through his phone to find the music app, you’re also surprised to see a familiar playlist.
“You still listen to it?” you find yourself asking, despite your heart clenching again.
Jin looks over his shoulder to catch a glance at his phone that was in your hands to see what you were talking about before he nods.
“Yeah,” he shrugs, “I don’t really listen to anything else.”
It’s the playlist the two of you made when you were rather drunk one night during your marriage. A random playlist filled with songs that didn’t really go well together, from upbeat tracks to mellow ballads that have your heart weeping and to R&B songs that set the mood.
It’s the millionth time that you swallow your tears, and you know it’s not going to be the last. It’s because it’s been less than twenty minutes back in close vicinity with Jin when you’re reminded that your lives are both so intertwined with one another that every aspect of his and your lives have remainders of your essences. Whether it be the scarf you precariously spotted at the back of the seat you remember leaving, or whether it was the keychain that dangles from his rearview mirror—or the damn playlist.
It was everything, and it hurt that you had to let it go.
You play a song that’s in the middle. Safe. A quiet tune that filters through the speakers as you turn the volume lower so that it wouldn’t startle your son awake.
“If you get tired halfway just let me know and I can take over,” you inform him.
You’re surprised to hear Jin scoff with a shake of his head, though when you turn to look at him, there’s a small smile on his face.
“You’re a terrible driver, so no,” he laughs.
You gasp, squinting your eyes at him.
You’ve gotten … better. Though your better was still debatably worse than the average person, it was progress nevertheless!
“I won’t get us killed,” you hiss at him, pouting as you cross your arms across your chest, “Besides, I don’t trust myself to drive if you’re not around, anyway.”
You don’t realise what you said, or the implications behind it. But you think Jin does when he flicks his eyes over to you, staring softly as you blatantly miss it to continue pouting while you stare forward, grumbling about being a better driver as he can’t take his eyes off of you.
“Don’t worry,” he says so quietly that you almost miss it, “Get some rest. I’ll drive us.”
You open your mouth to argue but the look he gives you makes you clamp your mouth shut in defeat. In all the times you’ve travelled by car with Jin, you don’t think you’ve ever driven the both of you, or even when Jiho became an addition to the family, because Jin was always so insistent on doing the heavy loaded things.
It was something that both annoyed you, but you were grateful for. You knew when Jin offered to do stereotypically husband things such as carrying the groceries, building furniture or driving you everywhere—it never came from a place where he believed you couldn’t do it. He knew you could because whenever he wasn’t around you did those things yourself, and dare you say, even better than him (with the exception of the driving). It was because he wanted to do these things for you, to have you worry about nothing but just yourself, him and Jiho.
The thoughts plague your mind, and suddenly everything is bitter again. You almost deluded yourself into thinking that things were normal and this was a normal family trip. But it wasn’t. Because you were inevitably going to get divorced, once he signed those papers.
“Hey, Jin?” you call.
He hums noncommittally as you fiddle with your fingers.
“When are you going to sign the papers?”
The question stills in the tense air, and you don’t catch the way his shoulders lock into position at your question.
“Soon,” he says curtly.
You nod your head slowly, eyes drifting out the window as you keep your sigh to yourself.
Yeah, it’d be over soon.
────────────── ⋆✩⋆ ──────────────
“You’re going the wrong way.”
“I’m literally following the GPS,” he says dryly.
“Then the GPS is wrong,” you snap, “The service is horrible here—god—make a left.”
“I’m not going to be listening to a person who gets mixed up with East and West,” he deadpans.
“That was like—ages ago! I’ve changed!”
“Not taking the chance,” he snorts, going against your very orders of turning left as he makes a right, shooting you a smug look over his shoulder as you glare at him.
“Pull over, I’m driving because I clearly don’t remember taking this road the last time.”
“Roads change, ____,” he groans, “Infrastructure and public goods! It’s government-funded so our tax money damn well better be used for good.”
“Still,” you say petulantly, “You’ve been driving the entire time—it’s time to switch.”
“I never agreed to that,” he says pointedly as you hear your son humming along to the song, giggling every once in a while when you’d get particularly frustrated with Jin.
“You’re going to cramp,” you say.
“I won’t,” he sighs before looking over to you, then into your lap where the gummies lay. “How about you feed me instead?”
You still at the suggestion, the rather intimate one in fact. Though you’ve done this a million times before, bickering during road trips and feeding him—it feels different now. But you know your son is watching, even if he doesn’t understand the severity of the situation, and you didn’t want to throw him off.
“Keep your eyes on the road,” you grumble before pouring out some gummies into your hand and shoving it towards him.
His eyes briefly cast downwards before ignoring your hand, eyes returning to the road as you gawk at his blatant dismissal.
“Um, hello?” you say in disbelief, “Gummies?”
You wiggle your hand in front of his face but he’s still ignoring you, a somewhat smug expression on his face as you scowl even further.
“Do you want gummies or not?” You snap.
“I do,” he shrugs, “I asked you to feed me, didn’t I?”
You give him a bland look.
“They’re literally right there.”
“You know what feeding means, right?” he sighs dramatically, “You do that with Jiho. You know—feeding someone. Putting food in their mouth.”
“I’ll put something in your mouth all right,” you grit as he grins, “My fist.”
“Please,” he whines as you roll your eyes, “My hands are on the steering wheel. You’re always telling me to keep two hands on the wheel yet you’re making me feed myself?” He pouts and you can’t believe this is a thirty-five-year-old man that’s speaking. “That hardly seems—”
You’ve had enough of his complaints as you begrudgingly smack your hand towards his mouth, effectively feeding him a gummy as he nearly chokes while his eyes bulge out of his sockets.
“Ow!—what the f—?” you glare at him at his near slip up as he clears his throat, “That hurt.”
“Oh, really,” you hum blandly, “Would you like another?” You smile plastically at him as he pouts.
“Yes please, but spare my lips,” he mutters.
You roll your eyes but listen to him anyway. You didn’t want to startle him into swerving off the road so you feed him the next gummy gentler. But you’ve underestimated Jin’s ability to be exasperating as he ends up biting your finger in retaliation for your previous stunt.
“Ow!” you hiss, glaring at him as you go to flick his forehead.
All he does is snicker, even if he does manage to dodge your finger.
“Revenge,” he says childishly, sticking a tongue out at you.
“You’re so annoying,” you seethe.
“You love it,” he smiles over his shoulder—and you freeze.
He realises what he’s said only when he spots your frozen expression. He’s about to rectify the mistake and dissipate the tension that arose, but your son is intercepting before Jin can make the shot.
“Love!” he giggles, innocent and childlike, “Love mama and daddy.”
Your eyes filter to the back as you see your son giggling, cheeks bulged as he smiles widely at you. For a split second, you’re reminded of Jin when he was a toddler, with puffy cheeks and a cheeky grin as your eyes soften at him. He really did look like Jin, much to your initial disappointment when he looked more like Jin’s child than your own. Even if your parents and in-laws said that Jiho had your eyes.
“Love you, bubs,” you coo, reaching out to squeeze his chubby fingers as he smiles wider.
“Love you,” Jin replies as well, eyes soft when he catches his son’s expression through the rearview mirror.
“Say it!” he babbles, huffing as you raise a brow.
“Love you, Jiho—”
“No no no,” he harrumphs, cutely folding his arms across his chest as you attempt to figure out what his toddler mind was getting at. “Each other—mama and daddy.”
You get it soon enough, and your expression drops completely as you feel the anxiety rise in your throat.
You were getting a divorce. Your son had no idea. He asked you to declare your love to Jin. Why did you feel oddly targeted right now, by a four-year-old, no less!
“Jiho—” you laugh, attempting to distract him but your son is persistent.
“Mama,” he scolds with a frown and you curse yourself for giving him the one trait of your own that you couldn’t bear to deal with yourself, “Say.”
You glance over to Jin who’s already giving you a passing look, a rather earnest expression marring his face as you clear your throat. Suddenly, everything’s more intense, and all you can see is his face. There was a time where the two of you abused your I love you’s that it was the first thing you heard in the morning and the last thing you heard at night. So why was it so difficult now? Why was it difficult to tell a little white lie in front of your son?
Perhaps it’s because the love never disappeared, from your end at least. And maybe that’s why all of this is all the more painful.
Before your son can throw a tantrum at your silence, Jin is reaching over the console to grasp your hand in his in a familiar manner as he brings your knuckle up to his lips and presses a gentle kiss to it.
When your head turns to him with your eyes wide in shock, he doesn’t break eye contact even as you’re about to yell at him for not looking at the road.
“Love you,” he whispers, and you don’t know if Jiho had even heard it with how soft he’s said it, but you think he does because he stops whining.
All you can do is stare at him, especially at how earnestly the confession leaves his lips. But you remember that it’s fruitless to keep hope, to have your heart flutter at his low voice—because the divorce papers existed, and it’s the first time in a while that you’ve heard it, and it was only because your son demanded so.
You pull your hand away, albeit roughly as your eyes dart out the window to distract yourself, to suck up the tears again.
You’re looking away quick enough that you don’t catch the crestfallen expression on Jin’s face.
────────────── ⋆✩⋆ ──────────────
“Jiho-yah,” Jin’s mother immediately runs up to your son rather than greet you or Jin as your son excitedly receives the hug, squeezing into his grandmother’s arms as he lifts him up.
“Halmeoni,” he giggles, “Miss you!”
Your face softens as you see the way Jin’s mother presses wet smooches on both of your son’s cheeks, accompanied slowly by your father-in-law, who’s far more mellowed down than his wife, as he greets you with a wide grin.
“Is this a way to greet your father-in-law?” He jokes when you simply smile at him as you roll your eyes at his light jibe.
“Come here,” you sigh playfully, opening your arms to embrace him as you feel the comfort of a familiar father figure.
“Yes, let’s ignore your actual son, right?” Jin snorts, huffing as he lugs your belongings onto the porch.
His mother’s ears perk up as she shoots him a stern glare that still doesn’t fail to have him cowering. Mother’s really are terrifying when they wanted to be.
“At least she responds to messages,” his mother narrows her eyes at him as Jin smiles meekly in response, probably regretting his words, “I know you’re grown but I’m still your mother—I’ll take you out of that damned company and put you under house arrest."
“Mom,” he exasperates, ears flushed as you snicker at him.
“House arrest?” Jiho repeats, confused.
You pick him up before pressing a kiss in between his brows to soothe the furrow.
“Daddy’s being dumb,” you explain.
“Gang up on me, all right,” Jin snorts, already heading towards the door to bring your stuff in.
His father pats him on the back before shooting him a pointed look.
“A word of advice son,” he murmurs with a low voice, “you’re never right. Your wife is.”
Jin sighs, and you can’t help the amused grin that makes its way onto your face. Even if he had referred to you as his wife—and you knew that it wouldn’t be the case for long, it feels nice to be with them again, even if your utopia would eventually get destroyed.
“The guest room on the second floor is for the kids,” his mother informs, “Jin’s cousins are bringing their children along as well so Jiho won’t be alone.”
You smile gratefully towards her as you guide Jiho towards the home, while the rest of them follow slowly behind.
When you enter, you’re immediately greeted by Jin’s older brother, another familiar figure that you’re grinning widely at as he enthusiastically extends his arms that you immediately jump into.
Jiho’s following close by, tiny figure wrapping around his uncle’s legs as Seokjung picks the little one up with ease.
“Ah, my favourite sister,” he coos playfully, pinching your cheek as you roll your eyes.
“Your only sister,” you correct pointedly.
He’s always referred to you as his sister, even before you married Jin—purely because he was there for you like an older brother was. Since he was two years older than Jin, meaning he was five years older than you, he always looked out for you and took care of you when you were children—and you were immensely grateful for that.
“Semantics,” he waves you off before pressing a kiss to Jiho’s cheek, “Missed you, buddy.”
“You too samchon,” Jiho quips back cheerfully, “Noona?”
He’s referring to Ah-reum, and Seokjung only grins wider.
“She’s coming in two days,” he informs in a hushed whisper, “I’m going to propose to her.”
Jiho tilts his head to the side cutely in confusion.
“Pro-propose?” He mumbles as you laugh softly, patting his head in fondness.
“I want to marry noona,” he whispers with a wink.
“Like—mama? Daddy?” he gasps.
“Like mama and daddy,” Seokjung nods as you swallow.
You look away, feeling like a fraud, especially when at that very moment, Jin brushes up against you with a gentle hand to the small of your back that you flinch at. The look he sends you is concerned, but you know it’s because of what his brother had said. Of course, it was, it couldn’t be anything else.
“Come Jiho,” you say softly, “Let’s get you into your room, yeah?”
He nods eagerly before you’re shooting Seokjung an apologetic smile.
“Hey,” he calls right as you turn, Jin close by your side. “Are you … are you okay?”
The question makes you freeze for a moment as you attempt to school your face and power through the grimace that almost appears.
“Of course,” you clip, “Don’t worry about me. You’ve got a girlfriend to propose to,” you say through a tight smile before squeezing his shoulder before you’re turning on your heel, face immediately dropping.
Jin almost chases after you, but he decides against it when you distract yourself by fiddling with the hem of your son’s pants. It was a habit of yours, finding solace in your son because he’d never do you or anyone wrong, though you could’ve been biased because you played a part in creating him and pushing him out of your vagina.
He wouldn’t do you wrong, you think as he mumbles about marriage under his breath. You really wished he wasn’t so curious.
────────────── ⋆✩⋆ ──────────────
“I forgot how big your family was,” you say a little breathlessly as you escape the fifth aunt of the hour asking about your life and work. That was fine, small talk was okay. Not asking when baby number two was coming along when you were divorcing their precious nephew.
“Sorry,” Jin winces, moving over so that you could plop onto the rattan chair, “it gets bigger every year because of the kids.”
You know that’s true because, for some reason, Jin’s family was as fertile as a fertility clinic. You were sure that they could single-handedly repopulate the human species if Thanos really did snap half the universe away. It’s also probably the reason why Jin managed to get you pregnant three months into your marriage, four years ago.
“Jiho’s trying to break up an argument between the twins,” you sigh when you tilt your head ever so slightly to catch a glimpse of your son helplessly standing in the middle of two older kids as they banter back and forth. Your son was too sweet for his own good, but it was also way too amusing to see his eyebrows furrow as he attempts to get their attention.
“Maybe we should tell our son to not waste his time doing impossible things,” he snorts.
“It’s good character development,” you reason, “It’ll teach him to acknowledge his potential.”
Jin shoots you a dry look before turning his head to the scene where the twins were now tugging at each other’s locks like they were in the tug of war as your son can only watch the scene unfold. You really should tell him that that wasn’t how you resolved conflict, even if their parents humourlessly stand by and allow it to happen.
“I’m not giving our son ammunition for his villain origin story,” he scoffs, “I’m going there—”
“Relax,” you stop him from moving any further with a gentle hand to his bicep out of habit, even if your brain stutters for a split second as you clear your throat, “Your mom’s got him.”
As you’d also like to call her, the heroine of the day, Jin’s mother picks up her grandson before cooing something that you can’t hear from how far you are. You’re thankful when she makes eye contact with you, offering a wink before she’s showing him off to her family members.
The sight makes your heart fond because everyone seemed to love Jiho, you really don’t blame them. You fell in love with Jiho before he was born and you would love him until you didn’t know love anymore. You never knew that being a mother would be this monumental for you, in fact, you never knew if you wanted children anyway.
But when things were … brighter. Jin was the only reason you needed. Then, you wouldn’t have wanted to do this parenting thing with anyone else. The bitter thought of co-parenting plagues your mind and the anxiety of attempting to explain the situation to your son doesn’t ease your nerves at all. Even thinking about telling Jin’s family has you feeling nauseous—you were the real villain. The heartbreaker of it all.
“It’s been a while,” he says, snapping you out of your thoughts as you blink up at him.
“Sorry?”
“It’s been a while since we,” he looks down to his cup before throwing back the last bit of orange juice in it, “Since we had a vacation.”
You snort, “I’d hardly call this a vacation. There are screaming kids and your brother is having ten mental breakdowns a day before the actual proposal.”
“I mean, I guess,” he shrugs, “We just haven’t had the time—to take one. This is nice.”
You don’t know what he’s implying but you know it makes your heart clench at the insinuation. You almost wanted to bitterly add that you tried to make time despite your own busy schedule. It was him that put it off. It was him that didn’t have the time.
“Yeah,” you say quietly, too tired to fight, “It is.”
“Why”—he hesitates for a second as his eyebrows furrow while you raise a brow at the sudden jerk of his tone—“why did you suggest—?”
“Jin?”
Your head turns, and you recognise the voice before you see the approaching figure and you already feel sick to your stomach. Not because you knew what Jin was going to say before he was cut off, but because of the person that comes into your vision. You should’ve seen it coming, really, because this was Seokjung’s engagement party and it wouldn’t make sense if—
“Chahee?” Jin greets in confusion before he’s being pulled into a tight embrace.
“Don’t be a stranger,” she whines, “Weren’t you going to come to say hi?”
Your jaw ticks as you look away from the scene before you.
When there was you and Jin, there was also Chahee and Jin. They’ve never dated, though you knew that if the opportunity presented itself, she’d be the first person up in line anyway. But with every relationship, also came with relationship troubles and unfortunately for you, Chahee was the instigator for most of your relationship insecurities with Jin.
It’s because you weren’t the only person that was a constant in Jin’s life—she was too.
Of course, she’d be here, and of course, she’d still look at Jin with a determination to make him hers. Even if you’re here, face blank as you wait and see if she’d actually acknowledge you this time.
“I,” he swallows, eyes darting to you, fully aware of what her presence implies. But your head is trained to the side, pointedly ignoring it for the sake of your sanity. “I didn’t know you were coming.”
She scoffs as if he’s said something absurd, which in retrospect, he did—because clearly, she’d be here. Where he goes, she’ll try her best to be there.
“Of course, I am!” She chirps, “It’s Seokjung’s big day—and besides, I missed you.”
You nearly roll your eyes to the back of your head and the audacity of this fucking chick. Sure, you were divorcing him, but to everyone else—you were his wife. And you were very much still together, even if it felt like it’s ended months ago.
“It’s good to see you,” he smiles politely, not making much effort to pull away when she rubs at the back of his neck. You’d clock her if you weren’t civilised, but instead, you take a sip of your drink and hope it doesn’t end up in her face.
“You too,” she smiles flirtatiously before she decides to finally acknowledge you. You think it’s a new record. “____, you’re here.”
She sounds much less enthusiastic than before, and you don’t blame her—nor do you plaster a smile on your face. Instead, you tilt the drink up to her and nod your head, giving her a less than a satisfactory greeting. You couldn’t even bother clarifying the obvious because you were Seokjung’s sister-in-law, Jin’s wife; and the mother to the adorable boy who’s currently stealing the show. Silence was a pettier option.
Her fake smile drops when she realises that you weren’t bothered, and you’re glad she doesn’t attempt to be plastic with you anymore when you’re fully aware that she’d sleep with Jin if given the chance.
“What’s up with her?” You hear her mutter to him as you roll your eyes, pushing yourself up to leave the two of them alone.
Alarmed, Jin hastily grabs your arm before you can leave, “She’s—uh, not feeling well.”
“I’m feeling—”
“Acting up at a family event?” Chahee scoffs. You would seriously slap her.
“Listen—” you sigh.
“Pregnancy,” Jin blurts as you nearly stumble from how flabbergasted you are, “You know hormones—not easy.”
You would seriously slap him too.
“You’re … pregnant?” she says slowly, jaw slackening as you see her eyes darken.
“Don’t listen—”
“We need to get you indoors,” Jin smiles tightly, “The sun—yeah. Not good for the baby.”
Before you can even get another word in, Jin’s dragging you into the house as you yelp, spotting the last glare that Chahee sends you before she’s downing the alcoholic beverage in one-go and stomping off somewhere.
When you’re settled into a private corner in the kitchen, only then do you yank away your arm from Jin with a menacing glare.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” you snap.
“Look, I’m sorry,” he sighs, “She was—she’s crazy.”
“And you had to be crazy too?” you ask incredulously, “How the fuck would telling her that I’m pregnant solve anything?”
“It’s to get her to back off!” he hisses.
“If a baby would get her to back off then she would’ve done that when I was pregnant with Jiho,” you say dryly.
“I panicked, okay,” he exasperates.
You scowl.
“Well fix it,” you snap, “We’re getting divorced, Jin. Chahee’s going to run her mouth and if it gets to any of your family members then there’s no way we can break our split to them.”
You sound much more bitter than you’d anticipated, but who would sound neutral or happy when speaking about a divorce? With someone you still cared deeply about, no less. But you’re slightly surprised when you see Jin’s face harden at the reminder.
“Is that what you care about?” he blinks.
You give him a weird look before sighing, turning your back to him as you find yourself a glass to pour some water.
“Jin, it’s due time,” you sigh, “I don’t want to make this harder for your family—”
“For them,” he laughs humourlessly, “You’re thinking about how the divorce is going to be hard for them.”
You blink at his sharp tone.
“… yes?” you say slowly, “We grew up together, Jin. Obviously the divorce would crush them.”
“You”—he blinks—“you’re thinking about them but you didn’t for one second to wonder how I felt?”
You freeze.
“Excuse me?”
“Yeah,” he exhales with a tight chuckle, “You really decided that it was over by yourself, didn’t you?”
You don’t appreciate his tone, nor do you appreciate the accusation. Not when you’ve spent literal months and sleepless nights agonising over your decision while you mulled every possible solution, crying over the demise and when you finally decided to take that step forward. You don’t appreciate it—especially when you did your best.
“You didn’t say anything!” you seethe. “You never say anything! You took the damn papers and flipped through to them like it was one of your business contracts.” “How did you expect me to react?” he exclaims, throwing his hands into the air as his voice raises. “I was caught off-guard!"
You scoff, “Really? That’s your excuse?” You narrow your eyes at him as you jab a finger into his chest. “Don’t give me shit for not considering how you felt when you’ve given me no indication that you gave a shit about this marriage at all.”
“Of course I give a shit about this marriage!” He says in disbelief.
“Do you, Seokjin?” you say bitterly, and the name returns along with the drop in his expression. “You don’t. I don’t know what you feel about anything anymore. It’s stopped being a marriage a long time ago. The divorce would’ve come either way.” You finish in a whisper.
“And you decided that for us?” ye snaps.
“Yes, Seokjin, I did,” you sneer, “I decided for us because we don’t even talk anymore. Every time I try to reach out to you—I took ten steps backwards from where I started and I can’t do this anymore. I can’t continue feeling like a placeholder in this marriage instead of your wife.”
“You’re not—” his eyes soften as he reaches out to you while you flinch, eyes darting to the ground.
“Don’t,” you whisper harshly, “Don’t you dare comfort me now, Kim Seokjin. Not when it took the actual divorce for you to be apologetic.”
The kitchen is silent, and it’s deafening, especially when the outside chatter filters in through the slips of the divider. You know they can’t see you through the tinted windows, but it’s a stark contrast with how people are outside laughing while your marriage falls apart under the same roof.
“So that’s it?” he says softly, “Ten years of dating and four years of marriage?”
“Don’t you dare,” you repeat again, weaker, “I wanted this to work out more than anyone else.”
“Then why aren’t you fighting,” he hisses, stepping closer as he attempts to get you to look at him.
You can’t.
“I’ve been fighting,” you return vehemently, though your resolve is weak at best. “I’ve been fighting on my own for the past four months to save this marriage and you—you just …” your eyes flutter shut as you feel the first tear fall. You don’t want to look at him. “You didn’t fight, Seokjin. You were the one that did this to us.”
“____,” he calls your name.
You step away, furiously swiping under your eyes as you attempt to keep the last few bits of your tears back.
“No more burdens, Seokjin,” you smile sadly, “Stop making this harder than it has to be and sign the papers.”
“I—”
“You should go look for Chahee,” you say softly, and you know your words are purposeful with its double-meaning.
You’re already excusing yourself to your room, the godforsaken room you were forced to share with Jin before you catch the way his face drops completely.
────────────── ⋆✩⋆ ──────────────
It’s been radio silent between you and Jin ever since your conversation from yesterday, and you’re both thankful and frustrated. It’s proven difficult to maintain an amicable distance from him when you were meant to be in love and married, along with your son who’s none the wiser.
Seokjung’s nervously pacing back and forth in the living room, but it’s not because of how large his family is—or that he has an audience to please with his grand show. It’s the prospect of proposing to Ah-reum, even if he was madly in love with her.
Right now, he’s not listening to anyone, even his own mother, the same person that would play the level-headed role in situations like these. It’s almost concerning when he mutters incoherencies under his breath, a slip-of the tongue that revealed his fear and desire to leave.
Your eyes widen as you walk towards the anxious man, leaving Jiho with your father-in-law who only smiles at you gratefully.
“Hey,” you say softly, reaching out to clasp his shoulder as he nearly stumbles from being startled. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“It’s fine,” he exhales, rubbing a hand across his face before his eyes are nervously darting towards the door where Ah-reum could enter at any moment, according to his cousin, “God—I’m going to puke."
“You’re okay,” you reassure him gently, eyes searching for his as he nearly doubles over in anxiety, “You’re good.”
“Am I?” he chokes, “God, I haven’t felt this nervous ever since I had to submit my Master’s thesis.”
You snort, even if you pat his back affectionately.
“It’s normal to feel nervous,” you promise.
“Is it?” he says softly, “I love her—I do. But … but why does this feel so scary?”
You give him a small smile while he peers up at you with panicked eyes. Despite him being relatively older than you were, he looked very much like his younger self right now. Nerves and wide-eyes as he contemplates a decision that would very much change the course of his life.
“It’s because you love her you’re scared,” you explain, “Change will always feel scary, and proposing to Ah-reum is a huge change in your life. Nothing will make this easier, but it doesn’t mean it isn’t worth it. Once you overcome that initial barrier, you’re going to thank yourself for taking that leap of faith.”
He groans, cradling his face into his hands as your eyes widen alarm, afraid if you said the wrong thing.
“You know,” he says suddenly, eyes darting up, “It’s a little reassuring to know that Jin went through this before I did.”
At the mention of his brother, your hand tenses on his shoulder—but you don’t think he notices. Or at least you hope he doesn’t.
“Way to throw your brother under the bus,” you chuckle.
“No, really,” he snorts, shaking his head fondly as if he was recalling those days. “You know, at first I thought it was too early for him to be proposing.”
Your eyes widen at the new set of information.
“Really?”
“Yeah,” he says breathlessly, “Don’t tell him I told you that, though. He’d kill me,” he says in a low whisper as you laugh, a little sadly purely because he didn’t have to worry about that. You weren’t even talking to Jin. “I knew the two of you were endgame—but getting married? That’s next-level commitment.”
“I mean,” you say bashfully, eyes darting to the ground.
“But now, looking back …” he trails off wistfully, “It made sense.”
He’s the second person who’s told you that within the span of the past week and you’re left more conflicted than ever. His words came during a time where you were contemplating on splitting up with Jin, so you have no idea what to feel, especially when you’ve convinced yourself that the divorce was the decision that made sense.
“Everyone keeps saying that,” you mumble.
Seokjung snorts, “Because it’s true. You ground each other, you know?” He murmurs with a smile, “I mean more so you to him,” he finishes as you giggle at his hushed whisper.
“I’m clearly the more level-headed one,” you say jokingly with a small smile.
“Yeah,” he agrees easily as the two of you share a laugh. “Early or late, the two of you are meant for each other.”
You ignore the way your heart pangs, the reminder that you once thought that was the case too until reality hit you hard.
“Maybe we did get married too early,” you mention quietly.
Seokjung raises a brow at your statement, and you realise the little slip-up too late as you purse your lips in a moment of panic.
“Are the two of you okay?” he asks with a concerned gaze, taking your hand into his.
You let out a shaky breath before smiling at him, the gesture not quite reaching your eyes.
“Don’t worry about us,” you tell him, “It’s your day.”
He frowns.
“Yeah, but you’re my sister and he’s my—”
“I’m fine,” you say curtly, realising your tone as his face drops before you sigh. “I—I am, really. Please don’t worry about us, okay? You’ve got a girlfriend to propose to.”
You nudge him on the shoulder to cock your head towards the door where you see his aunt frantically waving her arms, indicating that Ah-reum was near, and all retort that was about to leave his lips dies on his tongue as his eyes widen while he vigorously pats down his pants to search for the ring.
“God—fuck, shit godamnit,” he curses, fumbling ever so slightly as you giggle, squeezing his shoulder one last time before you’re shooting him a thumbs up along with a cheeky grin.
Good luck, you mouth—but he doesn’t see it.
The door opens and Ah-reum enters; Seokjung cries before he can get the words out but she knows. She knows because they’re in love.
You suppose love makes you know things. You look away because you’re starting to cry too, and when you do—you search for Jin on instinct, but he’s already looking at you.
────────────── ⋆✩⋆ ──────────────
“Did daddy cry when proposing to mama?” Jiho asks Jin innocently when you’re close enough to catch it.
“No,” Jin says honestly, brushing a stray hair away from his face as Jiho snuggles into his chest. His sigh is clear as day. “Was too happy to cry."
────────────── ⋆✩⋆ ──────────────
“Hey,” you whisper, nudging Jin with your knuckles as he stirs in his sleep, groggily fluttering his eyes open as you shoot him an apologetic smile.
“____?”
“Your back,” you say quietly, “Sleep on the bed.”
“But—”
“I’m not sleeping yet,” you say before your eyes are darting to anywhere but the face you yearn to hold. “Just … please. It’d make me feel a lot better if you were sleeping on your own bed than on this couch.”
He doesn’t argue with you, likely too exhausted from the events of the day to find it in him to challenge you like usual. You’re thankful for the sense of normalcy, even if you’re still tiptoeing around him. Even if the remnants of your conversation is the reason why you’ve encountered yet another sleepless night.
You don’t tell him this because it’s been months since you’ve confided him. Telling him what was bothering you didn’t fit in the context of your situation right now, and besides—he was too tired. He needed to drive.
Jin stumbles off the couch and you’re grateful that the room you were sharing had a couch inside, to begin with. You had no idea how to explain the fact that you and your husband weren’t sharing a bed to your in-laws, and you didn’t want to. It saved the hassle.
(Even if he’d take a part of you to sleep every night when he rests his head against the throw pillow than on the bed.)
He shuffles into the room, quietly shutting the door behind him to not wake anyone else up. The kids' room was a good distance away, but some of them had really acute hearing and he likely didn’t want to risk that. You didn’t need to spend another half an hour trying to get Jiho to sleep.
You sigh deeply, brushing a hand through your hair as your feet takes you towards the second-floor kitchen (and yes, Jin’s family was that wealthy to have a kitchen attached to each floor) as you prepare yourself a cup of hot milk. It’s a drink you’ve made over and over throughout the years, the same brand of carton milk always remains in the fridge—and you knew it was about the Kim’s had relatively picky eating habits.
It’s different this time because you’re making one instead of two, a lone cup that’s usually accompanied by another makes you sadder. It makes your heart hurt all over again and you’re exhausted. You’re drained but you can’t sleep because your body remains active due to the way that your mind runs miles.
You focus on the milk because maybe it’ll hurt less when you don’t think. But it doesn’t—because the stupid fucking milk only reminds you of him. The man in his room, snoozing away while you lose sleep all over again.
You’re momentarily absorbed in the way that the residue from the milk swirls in the cup to notice or hear the shuffling of feet beside you, but it’s too late because when you turn you nearly scream.
“Sorry.”
You’re surprised to see Jin’s mother standing there as you place a hand to your chest to ease your racing heart.
“I nearly screamed,” you confess, shaking your head as she smiles apologetically at you.
“I tend to do that,” she says, “My husband’s always telling me I move like I’m avoiding a footprint.”
You laugh at that, not disagreeing as you mindlessly stir your drink.
“It’s late, eomeonim,” you say with a concerned look, “Is everything okay?”
She gives you a kind smile before she looks over her shoulder.
“Heard something in the kitchen and woke up,” she tells you as your face grimaces in embarrassment, “Shall we head to the office to talk?”
You nod your head mutely, unsure on why she’s decided to stay away even if it nearly approaches two am, but you don’t argue with her. Instead, she guides you towards the study, a comfortable room where you can speak freely without worrying too much about waking others. Your thoughts run a lot more liberally in here, despite the ache in your chest.
You take a seat on the couch, noting that it’s changed. You haven’t been here in a while, yet it remained homey with a much-needed replacement.
“Are you okay?” you ask softly, “I’m sorry I woke you up.”
She waves you off.
“I couldn’t sleep anyway,” she says.
Your eyebrows furrow in concern. “Is there something wrong?”
She sighs, staring wistfully to the side as you see her throat move as she swallows. The longer the silence ensues, the antsier you grew. Was she okay? Did something happen to her? Is she—?
“You and Jin are getting a divorce.”
You nearly drop your glass as you spill some of the contents on your t-shirt, hissing at the stain. But you can’t even be bothered to reach for a tissue to clean at it when you’re looking up with a horrified expression to meet your mother-in-law's face.
“I—eomeonim—how?” you splutter, cheeks flushed in mortification.
“I overheard the two of you,” she says simply, “And Jin left his laptop open and I saw an email from Jimin regarding the papers.”
You don’t know what to say because you’re absolutely mortified. More importantly, you feel ashamed. Ashamed because she found out due to you and Jin’s shouting in the kitchen and his carelessness. Not from you yourself.
“I’m sorry,” you croak, emotions slowly overwhelming you as she looks at you with an unreadable expression.
“Why are you apologising, my sweet girl?” she says softly, immediately reaching out to you to wrap her arms around you as a mother would. And right now, she wasn’t your mother-in-law—but a woman who’s seen you grow alongside her own two children. You weren’t disappointing your mother-in-law but your second mother.
“I-I’m s-sorry,” you choke, tears immediately falling the tighter she holds you, “I-I’m s-so sorry. I-I tried—I didn’t—want to but—I-I’m sorry.”
Your words are slurred the harder you cry, pathetically shoving your face into her shoulder as she holds you. The dam breaks, unleashing the emotions you’ve held in for so long in the arms of a mother. She doesn’t say anything but brushes your hair, holding you a little tighter when your tears stain her nightgown.
You don’t know why you’re crying so hard. Maybe it’s because it seems all too real now, with Jin’s mother knowing. Her words only solidify the fact that your marriage was nearly over and you couldn’t do anything. The ghost of Jin’s words from a day earlier still remain clear to you, and maybe—it was really your fault.
You decided it was over.
“____,” she calls you softly as you continue to sniffle in her arms, frustrated at the fact that your tears weren’t stopping. “Look at me, dear.”
You force yourself to obey even if you can’t bear to, the humiliation of her finding out this way still tormenting you.
“I’m sorry, eom—”
“Please don’t say sorry,” she holds your face in her hands, forcing your puffy eyes to look at her.
“But it’s,” you choke, unable to look at her without wanting to cry. “It’s—my fault.”
“It’s not your fault,” she replies vehemently, swiping at your tears for you, “It’s not your fault.” She repeats in a softer tune.
“I wanted the divorce, eomeonim,” your lips wobble when you speak, words shakily escaping past your lips, “It’s all my fault.”
“I’m sorry,” she says instead as you nearly knock your forehead with hers at how fast you try to pull away, appalled that she was the one apologising.
“Why are you—?” your brows furrow in confusion when she holds onto you a little tighter.
“I’m not just Jin’s mother or your mother-in-law,” she says softly, “I’m a person and I see that you’re hurting. I’m apologising because you don’t deserve this.”
You swallow the lump in your throat as your eyes look up to the ceiling to stop your tears.
“I know mothers-in-law will side with their son,” she says, “But I won’t. Because Jin made a mistake and now you’re suffering because of him.”
“It’s not his fault,” you reply quietly.
You know that you blamed him earlier, but deep down—you could never blame Jin. You were the one that brought forward the divorce, and if you decided to keep fighting then maybe … maybe it wouldn’t hurt this much.
“I don’t know,” she sighs, “I don’t want to invalidate your feelings, that’s the last thing I want to do but …” she trails off as you stare at her expectantly, “I don’t know who he is without you, ____.”
You bite your lips to prevent yourself from crying again.
“Please don’t think of this as me trying to convince you to stay with him,” she begs, “If you’re unhappy, I rather you leave him than punish yourself.” You nod your head, eyes darting to your lap as she continues. “But I spoke to Jin.”
Your eyes immediately dart up in surprise as your eyes widen.
“You—?”
“Right after,” she continues softly, “I caught him before he went to bed and …” her eyes begin to water and you think you’re about to break again. “I haven’t seen him cry since your wedding day.”
Her confession knocks the wind out of you as you find yourself gasping, tears immediately leaving your eyes. The realisation that Jin cried, to his mother makes your heart clench. You knew that Jin wasn’t much of a crier himself—he didn’t even cry when Jiho was born. Nor was he the type to cry in front of his mother. He held his ego at a high level even if that irked you at times, so the news only makes you more devastated.
“I don’t know what he said to you per se,” she whispers, “But he loves you. He loves you so much—and that goddamn idiot doesn’t know how to do anything but work and I’m sorry for that. I shouldn’t be apologising on my son’s behalf but I want to. I want to because I love you as my daughter and I want to see you happy.”
“Eomeonim …” you croak, reaching your hand up to cover hers that lay on your face.
“Please, if you call me that I think I’m going to bawl,” she laughs quietly as you find yourself giggling along, despite the way it gets stuck in your throat. “My son is stupid. So stupid. Please—please talk to him. If it …” she swallows, “If it doesn’t work out—I’ll support you, either way. Just please, don’t leave whatever questions you have unanswered.”
You nod your head, chest feeling slightly lighter but burdened nevertheless.
“I will,” you say softly, “I promise.”
You walk her back to her room after, hugging her tightly at her door as she pushes past it, sniffling ever so slightly before retreating into the dark room.
You make your way quietly back to your room, mind weighed with different thoughts plaguing every crevice of your brain. You didn’t know what to make of her confession or statement. You wanted to believe her that Jin still loved you—but you didn’t know. You couldn’t know because you don’t remember the last time he held you, or maybe you did and it was months ago.
Your feet stop right in front of the door as you hesitate to reach for the knob. He was asleep, anyway. You decide to push, slowly turning as you slip into the dark room.
It wasn’t dark.
And Jin was awake.
He’s awake and sat in his bed, something resting on his lap as he uses the nightlight beside him to flip through it. He hears the intrusion as you stand, frozen, and his eyes lift to meet yours.
You think this is the first time in a while that you’ve seen him like this, in bed and comfortable with a slight puffiness to his eyes while his shirt remains wrinkled—the proof of his comfort. Your heart clenches because you missed this—missed returning to him in bed, soft and warm as you press against him.
And the dam breaks for the second time that night.
You don’t know what compels you to run to him, or allow him to hold you while you sob into his arms—but you do. You practically leap onto him, body curling pathetically into his side as he holds you like he’s afraid you’d slip away. He lets you cry your eyes out, he lets you cry until snot is unattractively running down your nose and staining his t-shirt. He lets you, because he hasn’t let you feel him for a long time.
You instantly melt into his hold, missing his warmth. And when your eyes briefly fall into his lap to get a glimpse of what he was staring at, you cry even harder.
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It was a banner you made for his twenty-ninth birthday, right after the two of you got married. Your then favourite pictures of Jin stained every surface of the banner, some edges wearing off due to age—and you remember each moment so vividly.
From taking a picture of him when he was taking a picture of you, to when he was making you breakfast in the morning, to his birthday as you smashed cake into his face, the flowers he got you when he broke your favourite cup, your fishing trip—everything. You remember it.
You sob harder, clutching onto his t-shirt as he tucks your face into the crook of his neck, pressing a soft kiss into your hair. You were so tired of crying but it was all you could do.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers after your sobs turn into tireless chokes, “I’m so sorry.”
“I hate you,” you cry, hitting his chest while he lets you, “Why are you so stupid.”
“I know,” he sighs, “I’m stupid. Hate me. Do anything you want to me.”
“I-I”—you croak, still slamming your fists into his chest weakly as you helplessly flutter your eyes shut—“I don’t hate you.” You finish quietly, your truth surfacing as you note that his eyes soften at your defeated tone.
Your emotions are everywhere and frankly, you can’t really think with how you’re pressed against his body like you never wanted him to let go. Right now, you didn’t. You wanted to be held, vulnerable and teary while he soothes you with his gentle touches.
You can’t stop the tears, way too overwhelmed to even process the fact that Jin doesn’t shift away one bit, hand clutching the back of your head as he rubs circles against your scalp. Who were you to pull away?
You sniffle pathetically before you pull away ever so slightly, flushed and embarrassed at the sudden loss of control over your emotions.
“Are you done?” he asks softly, referring to your tears as you pull away to swipe under your eyes.
“I don’t know,” you whisper, “I still feel like crying.”
“Then cry,” he replies gently, “I’ll be here to hold you.”
You want to hit him because his words only spur the tears on.
“I just wanted you,” you whisper, “I only wanted you …” your lips wobble when you look up at him.
“I’m sorry,” he repeats, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead, “I know sorry won’t erase the pain I’ve caused you but that’s all I can offer for now.”
“Why did you—why did you just”—you sniff pathetically—“why didn’t you fight me. Why didn’t you stop me.”
“I thought it would make you happy,” he pulls away, and you both know how absurd his excuse sounds but you’re too tired to fight. “I only wanted you to be happy.”
“You idiot,” you hiss through a clogged nose, “You would’ve made me happy.” You say softly. “I wanted to be happy with you.”
“You make me happy too,” he says softly into your hair.
You’re still angry, and you’re tired. But even if there were things you were unsure about, you missed being close to Jin more than anything.
“Your mom said you were stupid,” you murmur.
He laughs quietly, pulling you closer to his chest.
“I am,” he agrees.
The silence returns but it’s no longer as suffocating as the past few days have been. It’s more reflective than not and you’re thankful, even if your eyes are uncomfortably swollen—you allow yourself to be held. The weaker part of you is unable to say no to him.
“Why …” you begin softly, eyes looking up to already see him staring at you. “Why didn’t you sign the papers?”
He blinks at you for a while before he sighs, resting his chin atop your head.
“I didn’t want it to be real,” he says so softly you almost missed it. “I thought—I thought if I dragged it out then …”
“… it wouldn’t have happened?” You finish quietly.
He groans, frustrated as your eyebrows furrow at his sudden change in demeanour.
“I know it sounds pathetic,” he admits, “I was a coward, ____. I was stressed and overwhelmed and—suddenly … you wanted a divorce, I just”—he takes a deep breath to collect himself and you’re mildly alarmed to spot his glassy eyes—“I didn’t know what to do …”
“Why didn’t you talk to me?” you ask timidly, fingers gripping his shirt tightly. There was really no need for you to cling onto him, but you couldn’t do anything else right now. Especially when he returns the gesture.
“Would you believe me if I said it’s because I didn’t want to burden you?” he brushes your hair out of your face as his hand cradles your cheek, “I wanted to be the one you could rely on and … I didn’t know what to do.”
Your face crumbles when you note the sincerity behind his voice. Rationally, you knew that a relationship required communication but you knew Jin, and you knew that he always tried to plaster this mask to the world that depicted him as a reliable and unshakable fortress. All this time … he was struggling and so were you.
The realisation only makes you sadder, and you feel all the more horrible when you remember that you brought up the divorce in the midst of all of this.
“I’m sorry!” you wail, face burying into his chest as his eyes widen.
“_____—” he murmurs.
“No—I just,” you say frantically, rushing to get your words out, afraid if you’d forget as if he’d disappear. “I didn’t know—and I thought—I thought you didn’t … I thought we were—fuck. I’m so sorry, I just wanted you—I—”
You have no idea what you’re saying but Jin doesn’t look confused. He understands, and you know that because he shoots you a gentle smile before rubbing his thumb across your cheek.
“Please don’t apologise,” he whispers, forehead resting against yours as you blink away your tears. “I don’t blame you. I could never blame you.”
“But I …” you protest.
He shushes you with a kiss to your forehead and you instantly melt into his hold.
“You did what you thought would make you happy,” he tells you honestly, “There’s nothing wrong with that.”
“I asked for a divorce, Jin,” you exasperate.
“Are we?”
You blink, startled as you pull away, heart nearly shattering until he grabs you by the wrist.
“Hey, no,” he whispers, “That’s not what I meant,” he cups your face in his hands as your lips wobble all over again. God—you fucking despised being a crybaby. “Look at me.”
You do, and you see how tired he looks. How have you not noticed before? His cheeks look duller, and his dark circles are more apparent than ever. You just want to reach out to touch him.
And you do. Your hand shakily reaches out to caress his face in a way that you weren’t able to for the past few months. It’s almost like a new feeling, but your fingers find their way home relatively easy, tracing each pore and wrinkle, memorising his face to memory all over again.
“Are we getting a divorce, ____?” he repeats firmly, never breaking eye contact with you.
Your lip tremble.
“I don’t—” you warble, as he leans his forehead against yours again.
“Because I don’t want a divorce,” he says, and it’s the first time he’s explicitly admitted it.
“I don’t either,” you say weakly.
“I meant it when I said I want to be with you in sickness and in health,” he whispers earnestly, breath tickling your cheek, “And till death do us apart.”
“I’m sorry, Jin,” you say timidly, eyes darting to your lap.
“Don’t apologise to me,” he says sternly, not unkindly as your eyes flutter up. “Not when I’m the one that has an entire lifetime worth of apologies to give you.”
“I just …” you trail off softly, “I just want us to be okay.”
He’s still staring at you, and there’s a pained expression behind his eyes.
“Can I kiss you?”
His question stuns you, purely because you weren’t expecting it and because you’ve nearly forgotten what it felt like to have his lips pressed against yours, or even the nervous waver of his voice when he looks at you so earnestly that you can’t find the words to respond with. So, you settle for actions instead.
You nod your head mutely, heart ramming against your chest when he begins to lean in.
You don’t remember the last time he’s kissed you, or held you, or looked at you like this. There’s a dull ache in your chest when you recall the nights you’ve spent agonising over the downfall of your marriage, but Jin distracts you from your thoughts when his lips tickle over yours.
There’s no rush this time, even as your eyes are swollen while you flutter them shut. There’s no desperation to kiss you, and you aren’t desperate to be kissed either. It’s as if the both of you wanted to savour this moment—to remember what it feels like to have almost lost. It hurt—but it was necessary. A necessary reminder to you and to Jin that fighting was tiring but it was worth it.
When he finally presses his lips to yours, you nearly cry. You immediately melt into his hold, especially when he cradles your cheek with his palm and pulls you closer to his chest.
You kiss him with a mission to tell him how much you’ve yearned for this—for him. But you’re distracted when you feel something hot against your cheek.
It’s not your tears—it’s his.
You pull away, alarmed when you realise that Jin’s body is shaking.
“Jin?” zYou clutch his shoulders, eyes searching for his as he covers his face with his shoulder, effectively shielding his tears away from you.
“I-I’m sorry,” he chokes, furiously wiping his eyes with his shirt as your face falls.
“J-Jin, please don’t—” you say shakily, going to embrace him, but to your displeasure, he refuses, breathing deeply to collect himself.
You don’t think you’ve seen Jin this uncollected ever. Not even when he was crying during your wedding. His body shakes with the ferocity of his tears, the intensity of his breaths only causes his shoulders to heave up and down and all you can do is stare at him with sad eyes.
“I know an apology won’t fix anything,” he says vehemently, managing to get some of his words out as he peers up at you with red-rimmed eyes, “But I’m sorry. I’m sorry for making you question this marriage—for—for not loving you the way you deserve.”
“Jin …” you say softly, reaching out to hold his hand as his own tears continue to fall from his eyes.
This time, it’s you who allows him to nuzzle his head into the crook of your shoulder as he sobs. It’s quieter than you, but no less painful.
“I was so scared,” he confesses, “I was terrified when you showed me the papers. I really thought—this is it. It’s over.”
You stay silent, biting your lip to stop your own tears from escaping when you recall the memory.
“I was so scared what would happen,” he croaks, “I thought I was going to lose you, forever. I thought—I thought I was going to lose Jiho.”
“I’d never do that to you,” you say shakily.
“I know,” he returns, “But I was the most afraid of who I was going to be without you.”
You look down at him when his eyes dart up, pained and sunken when he clutches your hands in his larger ones, squeezing your fingers in a way that you assume he hopes to translate his desperation. You feel it, and you squeeze back.
“You’re Kim Seokjin,” you murmur, rubbing your thumb across his chin.
“That’s just my name,” he scoffs, shaking his head, “I’m nothing without you.”
“That’s not—”
“You and Jiho were the only one’s that got me through each day, you know?” He murmurs as your heart clenches. “Every day, when another deal failed to follow through and ended up bringing losses—or when the stockholders went against me—I could only think of you and Jiho.”
You couldn’t stop the tears that return this time around, choking on your own sobs.
“I wanted so much to give you both the world that I,” he swallows, “That I got greedy—and I ended up … I ended up losing the both of you instead.”
“I’m here, Jin,” you say softly.
“I know I don’t deserve it yet,” he says quietly, “But please don’t leave me.”
You realise belatedly that even with the divorce, you could never have left him the way you thought you could.
You don’t answer him, instead—you provide your answer through your actions by kissing him. Harder than before but just as earnest. Both of your tears clash against your skins, but you can’t be bothered to care when he returns your kiss with an equal amount of desperation and affection.
“I love you,” he breathes into your mouth as you gasp. “I love you more than love itself.”
You want to hit him in the way he’s making you cry harder.
“I love”—you choke on your words when he presses a kiss to your jaw, his confession raw and honest—“God, I love you.”
“I’m going to spend the rest of my life loving you,” he says vehemently, kissing every inch of your face, your jaw and your neck as you cling onto his shirt desperately right before his dark eyes look up to catch your flushed expression. “Will you let me?”
“Yes—God—please,” you beg, pulling him closer to your body as he peppers open-mouth kisses down your sternum and across your chest.
“Can I love you tonight, ____?”
You nod your head desperately, heart fuller than it’s been in a long time. You know the consequences, and you couldn’t give a damn right now. You still needed to heal, and so did he—but when he holds you a little tighter, you know that neither of you was going anywhere.
“Love me,” you gasp, “Please, Jin.”
“I’ll love you,” he hisses, trailing down your neck, his words juxtaposing with the tenderness of his touch as his hands slip under your shirt. His touch is molten, especially when you’ve missed the feeling of having him like this—close, desperate and yours for the moment.
“I miss you,” you confess while he drags his fingers across your abdomen and rests right under your breasts. He looks up at you with soft eyes as you return them, eyes swollen. “I really miss you, Jin.”
He leans up to kiss you, hands multitasking as they cup your tits while you gasp into his mouth.
“I miss you,” he returns with a heartfelt tone, “I’ll never let this happen. Ever again.”
Now, all you can do is trust him, trust him and his words and that he’d take care of you. His hands tickle under your shirt but you can’t be bothered when he finally cups your breast with his large hands, gentle yet steadfast when he tweaks your peaked buds.
“O-Oh,” you gasp, head lulling back when his lips trail down to your neck, hands already helping you out of your shirt.
“Will you let me see you, beautiful?” he murmurs.
“Please,” you say breathlessly, lifting your arms up to ease the process.
You should’ve felt vulnerable, being more than just physically naked in front of him. But throughout the hurt and the pain, he’s never made you doubt yourself for once. It was as if you were held captive by him, even when your heart was slowly shattering. It’s also why when he gives you a once over with hunger behind his eyes, you don’t shy away. Instead, your back arches, giving him more than enough to see—to feel.
“I missed you,” he repeats, pressing a kiss to your nipple as you whimper, hands curling around his hair as his head dips lower, “Missed you—missed how gorgeous you looked like this.”
He tells you more by painting the truth on your breast, lavishing each bud with pert attention as you find yourself growing wetter in arousal. His tongue is hot against the cool air of the room, the juxtaposition of the temperatures only sending your head into short-circuiting.
“J-Jin please,” you breathe, staring down at him when his dark eyes lift up to meet yours. His stare is enough to have your thighs clenching together. “M-More.”
“Of course,” he croons, “I’ll give you everything you want.”
You mewl as his hands trace fluttering touches against your stomach before they’re reaching your mound. He doesn’t drag this out as he’d normally, the distant memories of your nights spent tangled together as he edged you till you were crying. No, this time—he’s gentle, he’s soft and careful with the way he handles you, spreading your legs as you pliantly obey, eyes fluttering with every move that he makes.
“So beautiful,” he whispers, pressing a kiss to the top of your mound as you whimper at the contact, needy in want. “I’m gonna eat this pretty pussy, hm?”
You nod your head in desperation, lifting your hips to aid him in the process of slipping off your pants along with your panties, baring your slicked pussy to his face. You catch a brief glimpse of his expression, especially when he unabashedly ogles your wetness with desire behind his eyes. You’re a little flustered since it’s been a while, so your legs naturally threaten to snap shut but Jin doesn’t let you get too far.
“Don’t hide from me,” he says quietly, eyes peering up at you as you can’t find it in you to respond with how your throat clamps shut. “Want to see you. Always do.”
Your heart tugs in your chest, but you aren’t able to dwell on the feeling for too long when Jin dives into your heat, tongue immediately flattening against your pussy as he tracks your wetness up your slit to where your engorged bud lies. Your back immediately arches while your hand finds purchase in his hair, grounding yourself at the way your stomach immediately heaves inwards at his ministrations.
Jin doesn’t relent, nor does he tease. He’s quick and precise with every flick of his appendage over your clit, rapidly swirling the bud in the way you like as he alternates between harsh sucks and tugging at the pearl, causing sobs of pleasure to leave your lips. It’s a product of how long you’ve been together and how he’s learned every pulse and shiver as a sign of your pleasure.
“Pleasepleaseplease,” you mewl, “D-Don’t stop.”
“You taste so good, love,” he moans into your pussy, the vibrations immediately causing your toes to curl as your head tilts backwards. “A pussy like yours should be eaten every day, yeah? As your husband—I should do that.”
When he calls himself your husband, you feel yourself whine in pleasure, the term causing fondness to bloom in your chest. You don’t know if he’s said it on purpose, but he doesn’t stop with his actions, instead, one of the hands that presses your stomach down to keep you in place reaches up to where your hand clutches his hair and brings it away.
“J-Jin,” you whine, hips bucking when he swirls his tongue over your clit, slowly while his eyes peer up to lock with yours.
The act is all too intimate, and your poor heart can barely take it with how sensitive you are all over, emotionally and physically. But Jin takes your flushed face as a good sign, and he ruins you all over when he intertwines your fingers together.
“Can feel you clenching,” he hums teasingly, “you going to come for me?”
You nod your head vigorously, fingers pressing tightly against his larger palm as he laughs into your pussy at your eagerness. Once he gets the confirmation for you, it’s like he was holding out the entire time despite him causing your legs to shiver by the side of his face.
This time, Jin presses his face tightly against your pussy as you squeal, louder than you expected as he flicks his tongue over your bud so rapidly that your mind is blank in pleasure, legs shaking uncontrollably as your body quivers in pleasure.
“Oh oh oh! J-Jin—fuck, I-I’m gonna—please let me cum, please please please,” you cry desperately, hips grinding against his face as he slurps your clit like he was parched.
“Come for me, beautiful. Wanna feel you drench my tongue,” he encourages you softly, yet his words send a wave of pleasure all across your body as you finally feel the last bit of your coil snap.
“J-Jin!” you sob, back arching as his large palm splays over your stomach to keep you rooted in position, forcing you to take all the pleasure he was giving you. Your legs shake by his face as he keeps his mouth open with his tongue out as you ride the aftershocks of your orgasm away.
“Fuck,” he hisses, pulling away with a parting kiss to your clit that as you jumping. “I missed this. Missed your pussy.”
“Miss you,” you mumble dazedly, your fingers carding through his hair as he peers up at you.
“Come here,” he whispers, inching up as he gently holds your cheek in his palm while you immediately lean into his touch.
While you lay on his bed, relatively boneless, Jin stares at you with devout affection, his eyes softening when he holds your gaze. His lips glisten with your wetness, mouth slightly parting while he rubs a thumb against your cheek.
“I love you,” he says quietly, “I really—I’m so in love with you.”
“Jin,” you say shyly, eyes darting away when he doesn’t look away.
“You’re the love of my life,” he divulges gently, leaning his forehead against yours as you take in every freckle that marks his skin, and the dulcet curve of his lips when he presses it against yours.
You can’t find a response that would indulge in what you truly felt, so you settle for reciprocating his kiss, wrapping your arms around his neck as you learn all about the way he feels all over again. You miss this, and you’d admit it over and over again—until he reminds you just how much of a home his touch was.
“I want you,” you whimper, pulling away to peer up to his dark eyes.
“Gotta be quiet, okay?” he murmurs as you nod obediently. “Need me to prep you? It’s been a while.”
Ever the gentleman and the considerate person he was, although you reckoned it was the most sensible option—you missed the feeling of having him feel you whole.
“No need,” you say, “Just—fuck me, please.”
He chuckles, leaning down to press hot kisses against your jaw and the nape of your neck as he uses his palms to spread your legs, feeling the way his hardened cock presses against your thigh. You take the time to card your fingers through his hair, gently pressing against his temple, then his cheek, and finally his bottom lip while you attempt to let your actions display what you feel.
As if Jin senses this, he leans up to press a soft kiss to your lips. One that’s both desperate and longing, a greeting from the past that blooms in the present.
“Ready?” he murmurs, fist clutching his cock while it prods against your quivering hole.
He swiftly removes his shirt, chucking it aside as he presses the tip against your quivering hole. You nod eagerly, wrapping your arms around his shoulder as he finally pushes through the first barrier. Your breath hitches, mostly because Jin wasn’t average-sized by any means. He grunts from above you, face contorted as he slowly inches his way in, careful to not hurt you.
Frankly, you were wet enough from your previous orgasm and how much your body craved him—but as you mentioned, he was big. But the pleasant burn of his girth stretching you out have you gasping, eyes peering up at him in desperation.
“M-More,” you whimper, hips chasing his as you encourage him to sheathe himself further into you.
“Are you sure?” he asks, lips pressed against your jaw as you nod.
“I’m good,” you assure him, pulling away just to shoot him a small smile that he returns.
Finally, he bottoms out, the last bit of his length in you as you whimper at the feeling of being so full, so whole. Jin remains still, to allow you a few seconds to adjust to having him in you. While you were desperate for more, you appreciated the gesture.
There’s something oddly intimate about having him in you but not moving at all. There’s no rush to thrust into you with hot pleasure and love, but just the comfort of having him here—with you. Your heart squeezes in fondness, mostly because you missed him. Missed having him so close to you and in your reach.
“Y-You can move,” you pant, hips already moving at their own accord as he groans from above you.
“God,” he sighs, “I missed you. Missed you so much.”
“I-I missed you too,” you say in between pants as he begins to thrust into you, pulling his cock out until the hilt before slamming back home.
It sends your body up the bed as you indulge in how good it feels. Both emotionally and physically. One of your hands clutches at his hair while he builds up his pace by occupying all the space in between your hot walls.
“Fuck,” he grunts, “You feel so—good.”
You nearly forgot how strong Jin was, and how effortlessly he was able to send white-hot pleasure coursing through your bloodstream with the way that his hips move. He’s relentless with his pounding, the squelches of your wetness echoing in the room with every single purposeful thrust, your gasps of pleasure tangled with the way the slap of his hips meet yours—it’s all too stimulating and it feels so good.
“Oh my God, J-Jin, fuck, oh,” you sob, clawing at his back when he speeds up his thrusts, the tip of his cockhead scraping against the spot within you that has your eyes rolling to the back of your head.
You feel so full, and your pussy is attempting to accommodate his thick and long length. Your clit is throbbing in want as your hand reaches down to deliver some reprieve, but before you can do anything meaningful—Jin’s slapping your hand away to replace it with his own, and a determined expression on his face.
“Fuck, this pussy’s so wet,” he hisses, rubbing vigorous figure eights on your swollen bud as your mouth falls open into a silent moan, “Would die for this pussy. Always.”
His words send your stomach clenching, paired with the way he doesn’t falter at all with the rhythm of his brutal thrusts.
“Oh oh—ngh, p-please—don’t stop oh my God you’re so fucking—good,” you scream, right before Jin captures your mouth with his lips, swallowing your moans.
“As much as I want to hear you, we’re not home,” he reminds you softly, eyes swirling with amusement as you flush a deeper shade of red, a chortled squeal caught in your throat when he emphasises his point with a particular thrust that has your chest jostling.
Yet, it’s not his cock that has you burning.
Home.
Your home. The home that hasn’t felt much like one.
“Ohhhh,” you wail, muffled by his lips, “Don’t stop oh my god, I’m gonna fucking cum again—shit.”
“Yeah, gonna cum for me again?” he eggs you on with a grunt, leaning his chest against yours as your sticky body meets while his hips continue working its way into your pussy. “God fuck, I’m so lucky—you’re so beautiful.
“J-Jin,” you mewl, your glassy eyes peering up at him as he returns. Somehow, he knows—he knows even if all you’ve uttered was his name.
“I got you, my love,” he says so ardently that you feel a tear fall, both in pleasure and in overwhelming love. “Look at me.”
You do, and Jin decides to intertwine the free hand that isn’t abusing your poor clit into blazing pleasure with your own, squeezing your hand. It just so happens to be his left hand, and you feel the familiar squeeze of his wedding ring against your empty finger.
The realisation that he never took it off only makes you cry harder.
“J-Jin, I-I’m—” you blubber through a moan, feeling the coil in your stomach grow tenfold when he rams into you at a speed and a sense of determination you’ve never felt before. “I—oh fuck—I’m going to—!”
“I love you,” he confesses, squeezing your hand as it lays by the side of your head. The heat grows, and you feel yourself grow light-headed when Jin leans in to press a hot kiss to your lips, his own grunts caught in between your teeth.
“I love—fuck, oh,” you struggle to form coherent words, not when your pussy clenches erratically around his length, your wetness dripping down his balls while he attempts to focus on battering your g-spot with a snipers precision.
“Cum for me,” he grunts, “Cum for me and look me in the eye. Wanna see how fucking gorgeous you look for me.”
You whimper, squeezing your eyes shut momentarily as more tears fall, and when you open them—you see a manic look in Jin’s gaze, paired with his own stray tear falling.
“I love you—I love you I love you I love you,” you chant frantically, cunt pulsing as your legs shake, “I-I’m cum—cumming—”
“Me too, love,” he murmurs, hips stuttering when you clench around him. “I love you so much. You’re the—best thing. I’m so fucking—lucky.”
His own words are slurred, and you feel the coil snap, your eyes trained only on his expression as you feel your orgasm overtake you with an acute force that has you nearly blanking out. You gush around his length, and that stimulates Jin’s own release, his cum painting your walls white with its heat as you shudder at the feeling of being so wholly full.
“Oh oh oh,” you mewl, clutching his hand tighter as you choke on your sobs of pleasure and tears. “Kiss me. Kiss me please.”
Your pleas are granted with a desperate kiss to your lips, your arms immediately wrapping around his shoulders while he shoves his cock further into you, plugging his cum as you whine into his open mouth. He releases loads of his cum into you that it threatens to slip past your swollen folds.
Jin kisses you, and you kiss him back. You don’t dare to let go and neither does he. The desperation between the two of you is an accumulation of nights spent apart, spent agonising the death of your relationship, the potential of a future without each other—the hypotheticals of what-ifs. You feel his ring against your jaw when he curls his hand around it to push himself deeper into your mouth.
“I love you,” he says again, and yet your heart flutters like it’s the first.
You pull away to catch your breath, forehead resting against his as you sniff the remaining of your tears away. A croaked laugh leaves your lips as Jin smiles softly at you, thumb rubbing against your cheek with immense tenderness and affection that you can’t do anything but lean into his touch.
He’s still in you, and yet—there’s no rush to move despite the cum that leaks out of your hole.
“I love you,” you echo.
“I’m sorry,” he tells you, regret staining his words as his eyes flutter shut. “I—I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness just yet—”
You stop him by pressing a kiss to his lips, soft. Pleading.
“We’ve got all the time to learn,” you say quietly, “Now, I just want you.”
He pauses for a second just to observe your face, to take in your earnest eyes as he sighs, both remorseful and thankful. Thankful that he’s met you, and thankful that you’re still here despite his shortcomings.
“I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you,” he says with a determined gaze as you smile softly at him.
“I’ll take your word on that,” you say with a giggle.
He pulls out of you as you wince, immediately feeling his cum drip out of you. You’re about to whine a complaint, but he interrupts any ripostes from your lips with another kiss.
You’re not complaining.
“And I’ll spend the rest of my life loving you,” he says as you flush at his words. “Being next to you. Learning with you. Growing with you. I want to do it all—only with you.”
You want to slap him. You do. It’s the only thing you can think of when you feel your tears burn behind your eyelids.
“God,” you sniff as he grins at you.
“You’re such a crybaby,” he teases, leaning over your body to pick up his t-shirt before he’s wiping at your folds.
You scowl, ready to nag his ear off for using his own shirt, but before you can do any damage, he’s chucking it aside once he deems you clean enough before he’s suffocating you with a death grip around your body.
“My baby,” he murmurs into your neck as you flush.
“Jiiiiiiin,” you whine, “I need to—I need to pee.”
“Let me carry you,” he immediately says, swooping your naked body up with his arms as you yelp.
“I’m not—I can walk!” you squeak.
“Don’t think so,” he smirks as you roll your eyes at him, your eyes still puffy from your tears. “Your legs are shaking.”
And shaking, they were. You knew that you had no way of walking to the bathroom without collapsing with how good Jin had fucked you previously. But you were prideful as you stick your nose up snootily, looking away when he leans in to kiss you.
“Does the queen not want to kiss her king?” he pouts childishly as you roll her eyes.
“More like a peasant,” you mutter.
You squeal when he threatens to tickle you, blowing a raspberry into your neck while your boisterous laughter echoes against the wall.
It’s late, and people were sleeping, but the way that Jin holds you so gently as you’ve remembered—makes you forget about reality, about everything else. You can only focus on him, the way he’s making you feel and the way you see your best friend, love of your life—and your husband—return to you.
“Hey,” he murmurs once you’re done peeing and draped over one of his large t-shirts as the two of you cuddle in bed.
“Hm?”
“I love you,” he whispers, your eyes nearly drooping shut in fatigue.
“I love you too,” you say softly, snuggling into his chest as he holds you tighter.
“Once we go back …” he murmurs, “I want—I want us to go for couple therapy.”
You pause.
You look up at him, noticing his nervous expression as you smile. You wrap your fingers around him before brushing your thumb over his knuckles comfortingly.
“Okay,” you agree, “We will.”
“And … I want to take you out,” he says before clearing his throat. “On a date.”
“We’re married,” you giggle.
And it feels to good to believe it.
He rolls his eyes and you spot the slight flush on his cheeks.
“I know,” he says, “I missed going out with you.”
Your face softens before you sigh to yourself, happy.
“Me too,” you say.
“I love you,” he repeats again. You won’t ever get tired of hearing it.
You return it with a kiss, and finally, allow yourself a comfortable sleep after months.
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It’s both simultaneously all too hot and too cold when you arise from your slumber.
Your body aches in satisfaction from the events from last night, and you vividly remember the hot touches and long-awaited, teary-eyed confessions that were shared between you and your husband (and yes, your heart does bloom when you refer to Jin as his rightful position in your life rather than … that).
But the indent of where his body lays remains cool, as your body attempts to search for warmth that wasn’t the duvet absolutely suffocating you but in a touch of the love of your life. Still drowsy from sleep, you pat down on the mattress to find not what you were looking for, but a sick feeling of anxiety that stirs in your stomach.
The worst permeates your mind, and for a moment you’ve wondered if you dreamt it all—the reconciliation that promised retribution and a better future just a figment of your imagination and deepest desires. The mound between your thighs aches when you push yourself into an upright position, blinking as you attempt to search the room for his whereabouts.
Before your mind can continue to think the worst of the situation, the door creaks open—and Jin enters, face still slightly puffy from sleep but no less handsome than he’s always been. Your shoulders droop in relief, and just as you’re about to call to him—you note the third guest that joins you.
“Stole Jiho from the kids' room,” he whispers in consideration of your still snoozing son as he wraps himself around his father’s broad body.
“Thought you left,” you confess softly, making space when his knee pressed against the mattress, only for him to lay Jiho softly on the plush surface as he joins his son by his side.
“Never,” Jin says, reaching a hand to brush a stray hair away from your face before he reaches to hold your hand to press a gentle kiss on your knuckles.
At that moment, your son’s eyes slowly peer open, probably due to the fact that you and Jin were staring at him with full adoration. When he realises it’s just his parents, he grins, wide and with his bread cheeks before he lets out a giggle that has your heart soaring.
“Mama,” he smiles, chubby arms reaching out for a hug as you indulge in his affection. You lay back, pressing a kiss to his forehead as he snuggles into your warmth.
“Just wanted to hold the both of you,” Jin says as you rub gentle circles on Jiho’s back.
Your heart softens exponentially, free hand reaching out to Jin’s so that he’d wrap an arm around you and your son.
“Warm,” Jiho mumbles, pressed between the bodies of you and Jin’s love while the two of you stare, hopelessly and utterly in love with the person you’ve created—and each other.
“I love you, Jiho,” Jin whispers, hugging him impossibly tighter as your son smiles innocently.
“Love you!” he chirps back, eyes fluttering shut the more comfortable it gets for him.
As you run your fingers fondly through the strands of your son’s hair, Jin’s voice interrupts your love-dazed gaze with a soft confession, a record of the years you’ve known each other and the many more years you had to learn about each other.
“I love you,” he murmurs, leaning over to capture your lips in a kiss.
You smile even with the crust in your eyes, happy and content. You don’t respond because Jin’s already beginning to doze off, cheeks puffed and pressed against the pillow.
For a moment, you allow yourself to be selfish, to wallow in the love of your small family and the warmth that they gave you today, and every other day that was to come. You and Jin still had a long way to go before you could properly say things were okay, but the fact that either of you had given up, was more than enough to give you hope—to give you a vision of another thirty years, and more.
You’d do it all, with Jin.
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1K notes · View notes
wozwaid · a month ago
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the BTS fanfic writers on this platform are INSANE
YALL ARE SO TALENTED AND FOR  W H A T
LIKE YOU MANAGE TO TAKE A VAUGE PROMT FROM AN ASK AND TURN IT INTO A WHOLE ASS BOOK??? HOW?!
IM READING THIS ONE FIC RN AND IM JUST A M A Z E D  AT HOW BEAUTIFULLY THIS PERSON (amongst many others that ive read) WRITES? THE DETAIL? HELLO???? GET OFF TUMBLR RN AND GET YOUR ASS PUBLISHED  P L E A S E  YOU GUYS DESERVE IT. YALL HAVE MADE ME CRY ON THE TOILET MORE TIMES THAN I CAN COUNT
yes i read fanfiction on the toilet. sue me.
YOU HAVE ALL MY LOVE
- WOZ
965 notes · View notes
wishesunderthestars · 23 days ago
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Eunoia // Ch. 20
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eunoia (noun): beautiful thinking, the possession of a well-balanced mind, which exhibits goodwill and kindness
Pairings: Hybrid! BTS x reader
Summary: You are a world famous director and you have dedicated your life to your job.You have everything you could ever dream of; wealth, recognision, talent, your friends and family. But loneliness ins’t cured by success. So what happens when you somehow rescue seven hybrids? Can they fill the void?
Genre: Angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, eventual smut
Word Count: 10.7k+
Warnings: past abuse, past sexual abuse, cursing, past violence, mentions of blood
Masterlist
Chapter 1, Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 chapter 18 Chapter 19
Many thanks to my incredible beta reader @thewishofafallenangel​ <3
The taglist is now closed
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Los Angeles wore its hot and dry summers with pride. You were sweating the moment you stepped out of the private jet, your shirt sticking to your back and your jeans stifling your legs. Above, there was no cloud in sight but an endless expanse of blue and the white-yellow of the sun. An orange hue tinted everything around you, strange and dizzying.
Inside the airport, the AC froze the sweat on your back bringing sweet relief to your burnt skin. The midday sun needed only a couple of minutes. Picking up your suitcases, you headed to the parking lot and got into the SUV. John got into the driver’s seat because when it came to John, he was always the one driving. He only allowed someone else to do the job when it was for official events like red carpets. Overseas, he would turn on the GPS and navigate the streets with ease.
You climbed into the backseat with Taehyung, reluctant to leave him alone. He had barely spoken a word to you the whole trip. He would answer every question with a nod and you were starting to doubt he could understand anything you were saying.
Half an hour into the flight, your eyes were drooping and John’s head was dropping back on his chair. You had been tired from promotions to begin with when you had first arrived in Seoul. The late hour of the auction, the anxiety, and the early visit to the police department had only made it worse. You woke up to the captain announcing you would be landing in ten minutes and to kindly put on your seatbelts.
You were finally back in Los Angeles, its beaches and palm trees. There had been a few dark moments in the blood-red ballroom that you had doubted you would see Los Angeles again. Maybe that’s why it looked more beautiful than ever because you had nearly lost it. One slip and your last memory of it would be watching it grow smaller through a jet’s window.
But you were here now. And you weren’t alone.
You glanced next to you at Taehyung, the same apathy set on his face. It was chilling, the way it seemed like he didn’t care about what was happening around him. What was happening to him. Like a porcelain doll gazing at the world with empty eyes. But sometimes, sometimes you could see rays of something slipping through the cracks. A tremor of his hands, a shiver, wide eyes, and parted lips. Like now. In the heat of the summer, he was trembling.
It was hard to notice and you would have missed it if you had looked away a second sooner. But it was there. And you had nothing to offer him.
Your phone beeped with a new text.
“Namjoon?” John guessed. “Jimin?”
“Taylor,” you said.
She was asking if you had arrived and how the flight had been. She didn’t know anything about what had happened in the past 48 hours and she probably wouldn’t learn of it for a long time. You were tempted to tell her but it was better if she wasn’t involved, kept far away from the case.
“What will you tell her?” John asked.
Taylor would have questions. She would ask why you had adopted another hybrid. Only seven months ago you had been venting to her about not being prepared to take care of hybrids and that you’d never planned to adopt any.
“I’m not- I don’t know,” you said. “She can see right through me if I lie to her. And if she asks to meet him…”
Taehyung looked as beautiful as the silks he wore at the auction and he could be torn apart just as easily. One look at him and you could tell he wasn’t adopted from a hybrid center.
“We have recently discovered you are a much better actress than what you were given credit for.”
“But it’s Taylor,” you said.
John turned the steering wheel to the left and accelerated, the road ahead empty. “Are you going to tell her the truth then?”
Should you? Should you tell her the truth? She wouldn’t judge you, she would be on your side. But knowing could put her in danger. It wasn’t worth it.
“I’ll think about it.”
The first trees of the forest made their appearance at the sides of the road as it curved. In ten minutes you would see the lake and the Castle.
You wanted to tell Taehyung that there were six more hybrids at your house and that he didn’t have to be afraid. But he wouldn’t understand. He didn’t have any reason to believe you even if he did. You were at a loss as to what to do. You were good at treating injuries—Hoseok and Jungkook could attest to that—but Taehyung’s wounds weren’t physical.
The Castle appeared and it was every bit as magnificent as it had been when it had enchanted you into buying it. Glass walls and white columns reminiscent of the Greek Golden Age, of prosperity and growth. ‘A house made for gods’, the real estate agent had told you. You disagreed, it was a house made for humans who wanted to feel like gods.
John parked the car and got out. The six hybrids were standing on the other side of the fountain and your heart swelled at seeing them in person. They didn’t run to you, Jimin stepped forward but held himself back.
You opened the door, your legs feeling weak. You held the door open for Taehyung who followed you with his head bowed. John was unloading your suitcases from the trunk whistling to himself.
“This is your new home,” you said to Taehyung. “You can stay here as long as you want.”
John carried the suitcases inside, stopping to say something to Namjoon who nodded once.
“Hoseok, can you come here?” you asked. When you didn’t know how to proceed, it was best to go with the option that made the most sense. “I need your help.”
Hoseok came closer, greeting Taehyung quietly in Korean. The tilt of his native tongue made Taehyung’s head jerk back, he looked at Hoseok like he wasn’t there,  like he was nothing but a fragment of his imagination. Something he had created to comfort himself.
Hoseok asked him something and Taehyung turned to look at you as if he was asking permission. He probably was, his whole life was centered around obeying his owner.
“Tell him,” you encouraged him.
“Taehyung,” he said, his voice deep as the ocean and rough like waves.
Hoseok told him his name among many other korean words you couldn’t understand. He pointed to the hybrids one by one, you could only make out their names in the sentences. Then he turned to you and continued speaking. He said your name twice.
“Could you take him to see the rooms and tell him he can choose whichever one he wants?” you asked.
Hoseok frowned. “Are you not coming with us?”
“I think it would be better if I don’t.”
Hoseok’s frown didn’t ease but he gave in, speaking to Taehyung and motioning to the house. You nodded your head when Taehyung turned to you, silently asking you what to do. The weight of Taehyung’s life was too heavy in your hands. When he and Hoseok went inside, you allowed yourself a moment to breathe.
You lowered your head but you didn’t have much time to berate yourself about how incompetent you were. Jimin ran up to you, wrapping his arms around you and burying his face in your neck. You wished you could smell his scent, the vanilla and muffins you had heard so much about. Of course Jimin smelled of something sweet, smelled like comfort. If only it would have the same effect on you that the scent of pack seemed to have on the hybrids. But maybe it didn’t need to because with Jimin’s hands around you, your muscles loosened and the thunder quietened.
“Jiminie,” you whispered in his hair, holding him as tightly as he was holding you.
His tail curled around your thigh as he said, “I was so scared. I thought- Please don’t leave us.”
“I won’t,” you promised. “I’m not leaving you. I missed you so much.”
Jimin sniffled and you pulled him closer. Closer than was possible. Another body collided with your back curling around both you and Jimin. You could tell it was Jungkook without looking.
“My bunny,” you said. He nuzzled against the back of your neck, one hand tangled in Jimin’s hair. “I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere. I’m sorry I scared you. I’m so sorry.”
“Just don’t do it again,” Jungkook said, his voice close to a whine.
You stayed there for a while before you stepped out of their embrace. There were two more people you needed to greet. Namjoon caressed your face before pulling you into a hug, whispering in your ear how worried he was but he could understand. He could understand why you did it because that was a part of you he wouldn’t change for anything. The part that would help anyone who was in need and ask nothing in return.
It wasn’t how you would describe it. There was an ulterior motive for what you did. Yes, you couldn’t stand seeing people hurting but it wasn’t only about helping. It should be. But you had other reasons too and the major one was being able to fall asleep. You couldn’t fall asleep knowing someone was suffering when you could have done something to prevent that. You lost enough hours of sleep as it was.
Behind Namjoon, Jin was looking at you with a soft smile. You extended your hand and when he put his in yours, you pulled him into the hug. You ruffled his hair, connecting your foreheads, and watched his expression melt like chocolate. The younger hybrids jumped in, squeezing into the hug giggling and squealing in delight.
It was only after John had walked out of the house that you noticed Yoongi was nowhere to be seen.
♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩
 Jimin and Jungkook clung to you like honey, sticking to your clothes and your skin. They curled around you on the couch, scenting you while you petted them. You should shower, the airplane smell—a mix of disinfectant, jet fuel, and the cloying perfume they had sprayed the private jet with—was smeared all over you. You were eager to get rid of it but not eager enough to get out of the little cage Jimin and Jungkook had made with their bodies.
Jin had baked cinnamon rolls for your return and the brown sugar and cinnamon sat soothingly on your tongue. They were fluffy and each bite was soaked in cream cheese glaze. They tasted like coming home. Like sweet and delicate love. Cooking and baking were a way of showing love. You cooked for those you cared about, your friends, your family. Food was connected to every memory, good and bad. The smell of freshly baked bread, the sourness of citrus picked straight from the trees.
They didn’t ask you about the auction or Taehyung, they stayed close to you, the TV playing in the background.
Yoongi climbed up the stairs alone. His feline eyes landed on you before looking away. When he wasn’t angry and throwing accusations, he avoided eye contact. He would look at the floor, out the window, or at the empty space next to your head.
“Taehyung chose the room on our floor,” he said.
You didn’t know what to make of his decision. He could have chosen one of the two rooms on the ground floor, the rooms farthest away from you, and on the one floor that wasn’t occupied. He could have chosen to be away from the rest of you.
“He asked which one you want him to take,” he added almost as an afterthought. He sat down at the armchair away from the couch the rest of you were sitting.
“Whichever one he likes the most,” you said.
“That’s what I told him,” he said simply. “Hoseok is still with him, he’s explaining to him why he gave him the key to his room.”
You remembered the first night Jin spent in the Castle, how surprised he had looked when you’d shown him the key and told him he could lock the door if it made him feel safer. And Jin hadn’t been trained the way Taehyung had. The concept of privacy would seem alien to him.
Yoongi’s legs were bent under him as he lounged on the plush chair. His mouth could be a weapon but his lips were thin and pink like rose petals. And there weren’t any bullets in sight.
“I’m sorry for springing this on you,” you said. You had to get it off your chest before it ate your insides. “I should have asked you before deciding but it was sudden and I only had a few minutes. Two people escaped from the auction and the police hasn’t found them yet. And there were all those people who were attending the auction and saw me there, saw how much money I… I paid for Taehyung. There might be more accomplices too who could be watching my moves since I was one of the few who got out before the police went in. If I left without Taehyung, a few hours after I gave fifteen million for him, they would begin to suspect that I hadn’t been there to get a hybrid. But I’m still sorry.”
Yoongi turned his face to the glass wall. “What are you apologizing for? Protecting yourself? Rescuing Taehyung from those fucking awful adoption centers?”
Jungkook shifted next to you, laying his head on your shoulder. His hand finding yours and holding it.
“I’m sorry because this is your house too and you should get to decide who you share it with,” you said.
“And this is your life and you should do what you can to protect it,” Yoongi said, crossing his arms. “You are too careless with it.”
“I’m not careless,” you defended yourself. “I do what I have to do.”
Yoongi didn’t seem to believe you but he didn’t argue.
“What matters is that you’re here now and you’re safe,” Namjoon said. “But you should be more careful. Especially now.”
“I will,” you promised. “I got enough anxiety to last me a lifetime. I learned that I much prefer to be the one directing the spy movies, not living them.”
Jimin giggled and snuggled under your arm.
Jin shook his head. “Next time, we’re coming with you. We can’t trust you going on trips alone.”
You thought of Virginia and the fairytale house and the week you spent there with Jungkook, sharing a bed and talking late into the night. Yeah, you would like that very much.
Thankfully, you would have some time to rest until then. There weren’t any trips in your immediate future. Filming for the Raven Cycle would resume in two weeks and last for about two months. The only planned trips at the moment were for the premiere of Six of Crows in early November but from your experience, something new could pop up any moment. You really hoped nothing would. Not now.
“We should be careful,” you said. “With Taehyung, I mean. Me, most of all. He’s so quiet and… obedient. I’m sorry I don’t know how else to describe it. I’m surprised he chose to come with me instead of going to an adoption center. Given what he thinks I’m like.”
“He chose to come here?” Yoongi asked.
“He did. I asked him at the police station. I asked an officer to translate so I was sure he understood what I was asking.”
The officer could have lied but there was something that felt right about Taehyung saying he would be coming with you. It could be a false sense of duty to his owner they had instilled in him.
“Did he tell you why?” Jin asked. “Maybe he didn’t want to go to an adoption center.”
“And you were working with the police,” Jimin added. “You were the reason the police found out about the auction.”
You chewed on your bottom lip. “I don’t know how much the police told him about me and my role in the case. And I don’t think it’s that simple. He looks… broken. I don’t think he was in a place where he could decide freely for himself. I gave him the chance to but… I’m afraid he told me what I wanted to hear. Not what he, himself, wanted.”
“He’s brainwashed,” Yoongi said, his face tight. “Long enough in there and anyone would believe what they wanted them to believe. It’s not that different from hybrid centers.” The contempt was clear in his voice. “They want us to believe that obedience is everything, that we only live to serve our owners and make them happy. Imagine that but a hundred times worse.”
“How can we help him?” Jimin asked quietly.
No one replied because no one could know for sure. Taehyung was delicate, a butterfly who had never opened its wings. Or whose wings had been torn apart. And now there was nothing more than a frail body and the remnants of the beautiful colors.
“We can be patient with him,” Namjoon said. “Gentle. Be there if he needs anything, show him that he doesn’t have to be afraid. That’s all we can do.”
 ♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩
 Hoseok let Taehyung get used to his new room. It was clear that he needed some time to himself, away from all the strangers. It tugged at his heartstrings, the way Taehyung talked. The bitterness in his scent overpowered anything else. Hoseok couldn’t begin to imagine how much he had to suffer at the hands of those monsters. How many times they punished him when he made a mistake and how much pain they had put him through to make him this docile. This lost.
Hoseok rubbed the side of his neck, feeling the bump there. The tiny scar couldn’t be seen unless someone looked for it. It was what remained of the nights before he was shoved in the ring, blown eyes seeing red.
He swallowed with difficulty. Taehyung reminded him too much of him, of who he could have been if Yoongi hadn’t found him. If they hadn’t found each other. He wouldn’t have the will to fight too long, he had run out of reasons to stay sane. Injection after injection, with blood on his hands every few nights and no one to fight for—he had given up on fighting for himself—he would have turned into nothing more than a puppet. Feeling nothing until the day his own blood would be on someone’s hands, on the concrete, in his mouth.
But Yoongi had been his reason, his sanity. They had held on to each other when the nights were long and shrill screams echoed through the cells. When they weren’t themselves but creatures thirsty for madness. When the blood on their hands was warmer than their skin. Hoseok had stayed strong for Yoongi, for that gummy smile he had seen once behind the bars dividing their cages.
Yoongi was sitting in an armchair in the living room facing their pack. He was too stubborn to admit it yet but Hoseok knew.
“How is he?” you asked.
“He called you mistress,” Hoseok said.
When he heard that Taehyung called you mistress, he couldn’t associate that title with you. It was too cold, too scary in a way. It wasn’t you.
You sighed, softly petting Jimin’s hair who was snuggled under your arm. “I told him to call me by my name. He must have not understood.”
Hoseok wasn’t sure about that. It was basic English and close to a command Taehyung should know.
“He couldn’t understand why I was giving him the key. He asked why he would ever use it. I told him he could lock his door if he wanted. He couldn’t understand that either.” He took a deep breath. “He also asked about his collar and if you were going to collar him yourself.”
Your face changed, it was subtle but Hoseok could see how what he’d said pained you. Jimin weaseled out from under your arm and nuzzled against your neck.
“Jimin,” you complained, a small smile appearing. He stopped, tucking his face into the crook of your neck. “I need to talk to him. He needs to understand that he’s free here.”
“I’m not sure he knows what free means,” Hoseok said.
“He can learn,” you said. “He can learn here. I’m going to explain everything to him. About the auction and about living here. I have to go to my office to prepare some- No, better not at my office. In the kitchen, it’s a common area and more open. Maybe he’ll feel safer there.”
Your mind was running a mile a minute, it seemed to do that often. You were so considerate, more than he had thought any human could be. He had missed you, he had missed you a lot. It was hard being apart from you after seeing you every day for months.
“I have to go change and take a shower. Stop whining, I’ll be back in a few minutes.” Both Jimin and Jungkook were pouting as you pulled away from them. You walked closer to Hoseok and he took his chance to pull you into a hug. “You missed me too?”
“You know I did.” He could feel his tail wagging behind him.
You pulled back and looked at him. “I will need you there to help me when I talk to Taehyung.”
“Of course, I’ll be there.”
“Thank you. Just tell him he doesn’t have to come if he doesn’t want to. I don’t want to force him into anything, even if it’s just talking.”
 ♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩
 After showering and changing into a comfortable pair of sweatpants and a tank top, you sat down on the stool in front of your vanity. You had taken your makeup off before going in the shower and you could see every blemish on your skin and the dark crescent moons under your eyes. You didn’t look any better than you felt. Actually, you might look worse because at least you were happy being back. Your reflection just looked tired.
Sometimes, you would wear makeup in your house to feel like you were ready for work. It was one of the ways you had discovered to trick yourself into being productive. That was back when there weren’t any people living with you. The months when the Castle wasn’t just yours but Jacob’s as well, you would wear makeup every single day. Jacob had seen you without it but you would wake up early and put on foundation, concealer, mascara, and lipstick every morning without fail.
You patted your cheek, the skin was soft clear from any products. Each drawer of the vanity contained different categories of makeup products. You pulled open the one with your foundations, concealers, and powders. You toyed with a light coverage foundation before putting it down and picking up a concealer. It wasn’t going to cover your dark circles completely but it would make them look less like bruises. You applied a generous amount underneath your eyes and blended it in with a beauty blender. Next, you put on some mascara so your eyelashes were visible again.
You looked at yourself in the mirror, the image wasn’t that bad. Still tired but visibly better.
Your suitcases were discarded on the floor, Namjoon and Jungkook had carried them in your room. Later, you’d have to drag them to your wardrobe. That green dress was inside one of them and it was going to be kicked straight out of your house.
You asked Hoseok to go speak to Taehyung while you made your way to the kitchen. Wary of overwhelming Taehyung, the rest of the hybrids would go to the garden so it would be only you, Taehyung, and Hoseok. You set out to make a strawberry smoothie for yourself and looked through the cupboards for snacks. It was too early for lunch but you had breakfast eleven hours ago and had slept through the flight and missed the meal.
In one of the cupboards, you discovered three boxes of your absolutely favorite cookies. You didn’t remember having any left before your trip, after coming back from Virginia you hadn’t been too focused on groceries. Smiling wide, you took one of the boxes and opened it. You had been obsessed with these cookies for years. You were a responsible adult so you had tried to limit your intake and only buy them twice every month but you couldn’t stop yourself when they were right in front of you.
Jin had promised to create his own recipe and bake these cookies for you but make them better. You weren’t sure they could become any better but you trusted that he would find a way to surprise you.
You were finishing up your smoothie when Hoseok and Taehyung walked in. Taehyung was still wearing the clothes you had given him in your hotel room before going to the police station. Right after this talk, you would order some clothes for him and have them delivered before nightfall. Luxury boutiques could be persuaded easily when you were spending thousands of dollars on them.
“Take a seat,” you said, motioning to the stools around the kitchen island where you would eat breakfast every morning. Hoseok sat down first and Taehyung took the seat next to him. “Do you want anything? I just made myself a smoothie.”
Hoseok translated what you said and then shook his head. “I’m good.”
“Taehyung? Would you like a smoothie or maybe some orange juice? I saw some oranges in the fridge.”
Taehyung’s voice was close to a whisper when he answered, “I’m good.”
“Are you sure?” He nodded and you didn’t want to push so you picked up the box of cookies and put it in front of him on the table. “Here, have some. You haven’t eaten anything since before the flight.”
Taehyung looked at the cookies then at Hoseok, who took one and bit into it. He said something to him in Korean and Taehyung picked up a cookie and brought it to his mouth.
You sat down on a stool across from them and sipped your smoothie while they were munching on the biscuits. It was light and not too sweet, exactly the way you liked it.
“So,” you began. “I don’t know how much they told you about me at the police station and how much I was involved in the… case. Because you are here and you are going to live with us, I wanted to tell you my side of the story and explain a few things to you.” You paused every few sentences for Hoseok to translate. “I got an invitation at a party and when I realized what I was invited to, I went to the police. But they didn’t have enough time to make a proper plan so I had to go myself and give them the information they needed to get in and arrest everyone. I want you to understand that I’m not going to ask anything of you, I’m not… I’m not like them. All I want is for you to feel safe here.”
Taehyung’s hands were trembling again. It was still hot in the kitchen despite the AC being on.
“I’m not going to order you to do anything. You are free to do anything you want here. You aren’t going to be punished. I’ll never punish you. And if you ever regret coming with me, we can find a way for you to go back to Seoul,” you added.
Taehyung stiffened, his muscles tightening like a string on a violin. His hands stilled on his thighs. He said something in Korean, his voice shaky. There was sadness in Hoseok’s eyes as he replied. Taehyung’s lips trembled as he spoke again. Hoseok said something.
“He asks if you are displeased with him,” he told you.
“No, of course not,” you quickly denied. “Why would he think that?”
Taehyung didn’t reply.
“I’m not sending you away,” you said. “It’s your choice. If you want to go back to Seoul at any point, you can. If you want to stay here, you can.”
Taehyung spoke quietly, his voice was always quiet. Quiet and deep.
“He asks if he can go to his room, I told him that he can but he wants to hear it from you,” Hoseok said.
“You can. You don’t have to ask.”
Taehyung got up and bowed his head to you before leaving. A strange glimmer on his cheek was caught on the light spilling through the glass wall.
“I feel like that didn’t go very well,” you said.
Hoseok picked up another cookie, stared at it. “He asked me if I was translating correctly.”
“He…” You paused. “He hasn’t known anything else than what they prepared him for. It will be difficult for him to adjust.” You considered telling him about the night in your hotel room and the vulnerability in his eyes when you’d told him to lay down and sleep, how his body hadn’t relaxed until you’d left the room. Maybe not even then. In the end, you decided against it. “He’s expecting something that will never come and I suspect he believes I’m testing him.”
“Testing him?” Hoseok asks in disbelief.
“Yes, like I’m trying to make him slip or see how well-behaved he really is. God, I hate that word.”
Hoseok turned to the door, Taehyung was long gone. “How long was he with them?”
“I don’t know,” you said. You regretted not asking the police, maybe they had known when he disappeared. “A long time.”
Hoseok clenched his eyes shut, he let go of the cookie and closed his hand into a fist. “I shouldn’t be surprised. I have seen the worst of humanity. But… How young was he? How many times has he been auctioned off for whoever has the most money?” He deflated. “He’s afraid. He has been hurt, a lot.”
“Not anymore,” you said.
You sat across from him and sipped on your smoothie sharing a box of your favorite cookies.
Your little family joined you, Jungkook stealing the last couple of cookies—sharing one with Jimin after a lot of pouting. Jin headed to the chef’s kitchen to cook lunch. He instantly turned you down when you offered to help him and yes, your body felt a little like jelly but you could chop some vegetables.
You listened to him and didn’t take part in cooking but when the food was ready, you sneaked into the kitchen and wrapped your arms around his waist. The steak slipped from his spatula and fell on the plate with a plop.
He pouted and you had to hold yourself back from getting a taste of his plump lips. “Don’t do that, you scared me.”
You giggled and leaned over his shoulder to take in the delicious aroma of his cooking. “That smells incredible and I’m crazy hungry.”
He adjusted the steak on the plate with the spatula. “Didn’t you eat a box of cookies? Right before lunch?”
“I didn’t eat them alone, I shared them with Hobi,” you said. “And there aren’t that many in the box.” You placed tiny kisses along his neck. You were alone in the chef’s kitchen but you could hear the others in the next room. “I missed you.”
“You want to hear how much I missed you again? I-Is that it?” Jin stuttered, his human ears growing red.
You swayed, moving him with you. “What if I do?”
Jin set the plate aside, giving up on decorating it with your arms around him. “I told you, next time we’re coming with you. You aren’t going alone anywhere anymore.”
Satisfied with flustering him and having him close, you helped him serve the steaks on the plates. With help from everyone, you carried all the plates, bowls, and cutlery to the garden. You laughed as Jimin danced around Yoongi while the latter was carrying the salad downstairs, the panther hybrid complaining that he would trip on him and they would both fall. Namjoon had spread the tablecloth and was sitting there reading a book.
You set down the large platter filled with the fries and kissed his cheek, watching a smile bloom on his face. Jungkook juggled two trays, Jin shouting at him to put them down before everything landed on the floor and half of you went hungry. Jungkook was successful and Jimin and Hoseok cheered for him like teenage cheerleaders.
Hoseok went to call for Taehyung as you took your seats around the table. You were careful with how you acted but you also wanted to show him how a normal lunch was at the Castle. Overlooking the fact that you weren’t there for most of the normal lunches.
Taehyung remained silent in his seat next to Hoseok, cutting his steak into small pieces and eating the fries and salad you had served him when he hadn’t moved to take any for himself.
“And the interviewer wouldn’t stop asking about the two actors and if they were in a relationship and I was so fed up with him but I couldn’t say anything. He must have asked one question about the show and every other question was about them,” you recounted about one of the interviews in London. “I was doing interviews with the two of them for that spree and the showrunner I could see how uncomfortable they were and-” You chuckled remembering what had happened. “The showrunner could see that too. So she just said ‘If you’re so interested in our relationships, I must tell you about my wife’ and until the end of the interview she didn’t stop talking about her wife. The interviewer was horrified. Asshole.”
One of the actors had laughed so hard after the interviewer had left that she’d fallen off her chair. You already liked the showrunner, much more than any of the producers, but after that, you decided that you simply adored her.
You were going on about the party you had attended in Paris when Taehyung pushed himself away from the table. He staggered to his feet but his knees bent underneath him and he fell to the floor. His body spasmed before he bent over and emptied the contents of his stomach on the grass. You shot up, your own stomach twisting. Hoseok rushed to him but stopped before touching him. Taehyung retched and retched.
When there was nothing left for him to throw up, he stayed there shaking. Tentatively, you walked closer, and in-between the small sounds you could now identify as sobs, you heard him say the first words you could understand. I’m sorry. Over and over again.
I’m sorry.
“It’s okay,” you said although you knew it wasn’t. Nothing about this was okay. Taehyung was gripping his hair, pulling. “It’s okay. You’re okay.”
Hoseok knelt on the floor next to him and whispered soothingly in Korean. Carefully, he enveloped Taehyung’s hands with his and pried them away from his black locks. He helped him up as Taehyung switched between Korean and English. In English, it was the same words, the same broken words. Hoseok’s eyes locked with Yoongi’s who nodded. You and Hoseok exchanged a look before he all but carried Taehyung into the house.
“He ate too much,” Yoongi said, face tight. “He must be malnourished and his stomach couldn’t handle too much food too quickly. How did I not notice?” The question was but a whisper flying away and fading.
“He must have been hungry,” Jungkook said, avoiding looking at the foul-smelling patch of grass.
Taehyung had been eating steadily throughout the meal. He had cleaned most of his plate. You remembered filling his plate and telling him to eat up. And it clicked.
“I told him to eat up,” you said. “I told him to eat up and he did. He did exactly what I told him to do. How did I forget?”
“It isn’t your fault,” Namjoon said, not didn’t leave any room for disagreements.
“He thought it was an order,” you said.
“But it wasn’t. You couldn’t have known he would take it as an order because that wasn’t your intention. We will be more careful next time. We will pay more attention to him.”
You sat down on the bench. The food didn’t look as appetizing. Your half-finished steak would go untouched. One mistake. All it needed was one mistake to ruin your first lunch back home.
“Hobi will take care of him,” Yoongi said. He hadn’t picked up his fork and knife again either. “He’s good at comforting.”
Jin got up to clean, spraying the grass with cold water from the hose. Lunch was over.
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 Hoseok dried Taehyung’s tears with a towel he found in the small en suite bathroom—small by the standards of the Castle. Taehyung sat still and let him pat his face dry. Hoseok could see the strain of keeping himself from shaking like a leaf.
Taehyung didn’t say a word and Hoseok wasn’t good at filling long silences like you. He wished he had stories to tell, of long trips and stupid little adventures, but all of his stories were bitter on his tongue. He had traveled with his past owner, he had been on tour with him but most of the time he had been locked in a hotel room until they had to leave. Any good memories—learning to dance in empty rooms full of mirrors and attending concerts to see his owner on stage—were overshadowed by the miserable last few months until he was nothing more than poker chips his owner lost.
Maybe if his past was brighter, he could have offered Taehyung some comfort.
“Do you want to sleep? It will help you feel better,” Hoseok said. “A nap can do miracles if I say so myself.”
Taehyung didn’t move, didn’t look at him when he talked. He looked like a beautiful illusion. Not solid. Not really there. Slipping through your fingers like smoke from a blown-out flame.
Hoseok lowered the blankets on the bed, making space for Taehyung to get under. The remote controlling the lights and the blinds was on the bedside table and Hoseok grabbed it and pressed the button for the blinds. With a beep, they began their descent blocking out the blazing sunlight.
“N-no, stop! S-stop them,” Taehyung begged, startling him. Frightened eyes were staring at the blinds, which had covered half of the wall. His body was poised to run to them as if he is going to attempt to stop them.
Hurriedly, the remote almost tumbling out of his hands, Hoseok pressed another button and the blinds stopped. Taehyung shrunk in on himself, his arms hugging his torso.
“Thank you,” he whispered and Hoseok had the urge to wrap him up in blankets and protect him. Protect him from what? What he should have been protected from had come and passed.
“You don’t like the dark?” Hoseok asked.
Taehyung shook his head.
The cells had been dark. Some nights there was no light, no windows for moonlight to slip through, other nights there was a faint glow from somewhere, one of the guards must have been lighting up a lamp. When they were drowning in an ocean of darkness, Hoseok would squeeze his fingers through the bars separating his cell from Yoongi’s and touch the panther’s hand.
“I don’t like the dark much either,” he confessed. He handed the remote to Taehyung. “Here. These three buttons are for the blinds. When you push this they are lowered, with this they are raised and this one is to stop them. And these are for the lights. The lights have three settings for brightness, you can choose which one you prefer. The light switch on the wall turns them on at their brightest setting.”
Taehyung stared at the remote in barely concealed wonder. “Can I…?”
“Go ahead,” Hoseok encouraged him.
He pressed one of the buttons and the blinds receded. The view was the same as his room with Yoongi, only that from Taehyung’s room a part of the side garden could also be seen.
“When is she going to call for me?” Taehyung asked.
“Call for you?”
“I was bad.”
It broke Hoseok’s heart.
“You weren’t bad.” He sat down on the bed next to the younger hybrid. He was still so young, younger than all of them and he had been so deeply hurt. “The food just didn’t agree with you, that’s all. Next time, Jinnie will cook something lighter for you. How does that sound?”
“But-” He’s bottom lip trembled. “I ruined the lunch and the lawn. I was bad. I deserve to be punished. I-”
“Don’t,” Hoseok interrupted him before he could go on. “Don’t say that. You don’t deserve to be punished. You did nothing wrong. I know it’s hard to believe, I know that’s not the way you’ve been taught, but it’s different here. You won’t be punished for things you can’t control. You won’t be punished at all. You aren’t a pet, Taehyung. You are a person and you will be treated as such.”
Silent tears rolled down his face, glittering like diamonds. Hoseok picked up the towel and wiped them away.
♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩
 On the computer in your office, you scrolled through rows and rows of photos of models wearing high-end clothes while you spoke to Amelia. Your phone was balanced between your ear and your shoulder. Your wireless earbuds were in your handbag somewhere in your bedroom and you had been too lazy to go get them. Jimin had already laid his head in your lap and you weren’t about to ask him to move. He was draped over the armrests of the chairs which didn’t look comfortable at all. It could be something in his cat DNA. He and Jungkook had followed you into your office and promised to be quiet. The latter was sitting on the couch sketching in his sketchbook, it was a new one you hadn’t seen before. Your bunny went through sketchbooks faster than you filmed episodes.
Earlier, you had sent Amelia the documents they had given you at the auction. She had to look over them before obtaining the legal documents without raising any alarms in the system. Taehyung’s adoption was a phantom, a gray blurry area somewhere in a server, and Amelia was the only one you trusted to fix it. You had been on the phone with her for half an hour telling her any details she asked about the auction.
“So how long do you believe that will take you?” you asked her. You clicked on a pair of beige sweatpants that looked extremely comfortable, selected one of the smallest sizes, and added them to the cart.
“A week at least,” she replied. “That’s difficult work. They have managed to somehow trick the system but to do that it’s like they have almost put it to sleep when it comes to the hybrids they had at the auction. If I wake it up, the alarms will go off and we don’t want that.”
You clicked on another pair of pants. “We certainly don’t want that. A week doesn’t sound too long. I won’t have any problems until then, right?”
“Not any that I can think of. I told you, they have covered their tracks very well. And if anyone figures something is wrong, the Korean police can vouch for you. They are the ones who put you up to this, they might as well take responsibility.”
You chuckled, adding a few more pieces of clothing to your cart. “I would rather no one figures out anything. I have been in the middle of too many things recently and coincidences can only go so far.”
“You mean to tell me they weren’t all coincidences?”
“Of course they were coincidences,” you said. “Mostly. But some random policeman, or worse reporter, doesn’t know that and would prefer not to believe that. Please, I don’t need any scandals.”
“You tell me about it.”
Jimin looked up at you, his blond hair tousled and framing his face. As many times as you saw him like that you were always surprised at how angelic he looked. You abandoned the mouse in favor of running your hands through his silky hair and were rewarded with low purrs.
“Should I do anything until everything has been settled?” you asked.
“Just be discreet. I want to believe you know how to do that and that your recent adventures have been but a strike of bad luck. A long one.”
“Hey,” you objected. “Bad luck but I was still discreet.”
You couldn’t see her but you could picture the expression on her face, the one that said ‘You are insufferable but I am very fond of you for no good reason.
“Did you see any articles about me adopting stray hybrids? Or getting involved with the police? I don’t think you did.”
Jungkook hid a giggle behind his notebook.
“If that happens, it will be my last straw,” Amelia said. You didn’t believe her. Would she put her whole team in a frenzy to face it? Yes. But she wouldn’t give up, it wasn’t in her nature. “You know the precautions. Don’t parade around with him, don’t post anything about him on social media, don’t tell anyone about him until I give you the okay.”
“Why would I post about him on social media?” You mostly used your social media to talk about your projects and post-behind-the-scenes content. You rarely, if ever, posted anything about your private life.
“Accidents happen and with your luck…”
“Okay, okay, I get it. I will be careful. I promise.”
“That’s all I can ask for.” As an afterthought, she added, “And for you to stop getting into messes that I have to solve. Can you please stop acquiring hybrids in every way but normal adoption?”
“Ehhhh…”
You said your goodbyes and you went back to ordering clothes and shoes for Taehyung. A small bubble over the cart declared that you had added forty-three items. That would be more than enough for the first few days of his stay. Most of the clothes were practical, nothing too tight that might not fit him or make him uncomfortable. You would figure out his size through trial and error. This was the first trial.
When the order was placed, you called the store and asked them to deliver them to your house today. You had bought plenty of clothes from them before and with a promise to tip them well for the favor they agreed easily.
That was another item in your to-do list crossed off. You considered checking the emails about season 6 of Paper Hearts or going over the scripts of the next few episodes of the Raven Cycle. None of these appealed to you so you turned off your computer and smiled down at Jimin who was rolling a lock of your hair around his finger like a little kid. You deserved one day to yourself.
You spent some more time with them before you went to the kitchen to make a cup of tea for yourself. The text arrived a minute after you let the tea leaves steep in the hot water.
My dear daughter. Your father and I are immensely proud of the success your show has achieved and wish to congratulate you on the premiere of its fifth season which will undoubtedly win the hearts of worldwide audiences. Next week, we will be visiting Mr. and Mrs. Davidson in Los Angeles and it would mean a lot to us if you could find some time in your busy schedule and have lunch with your parents. Mr. and Mrs. Davidson have a wonderful son who is a big fan of your work and has expressed his interest in you. I would love for you to meet him because I believe you would make a great pair. We miss you dearly.
You stared at the text willing it to disappear. This couldn’t be happening. Your mother had shown little interest in your shows and movies unless she was bragging about them to others. The last time she had acknowledged your work without any prompt or anyone to impress was three years ago when she had sent you a bouquet of pink roses at the premiere of one of your movies.
You dug around your memory for any Mr. and Mrs. Davidson. Usually, when your mother was introducing you to people, you subconsciously tuned out during any long prologues. In the span of a few hours, she could introduce you to more than seventy people, it would be more surprising for you to remember them than to forget them.
The search results on your phone brought up a college in North Carolina and a man with curly white hair in his late fifties. According to his Wikipedia profile, he was the CEO of one of the largest car manufacturing companies in the world. Of course, your mother wanted to set you up with his son. You never imagined your mother would resort to acting like a matchmaker, her friends must have been asking questions about you and why you weren’t dating.
“What’s got you looking so gloomy?” A smooth voice had you turning off your phone and hiding it in your back pocket. Yoongi opened the fridge and pulled out a bottle of orange juice.
“It’s just work,” you said.
Yoongi went on his tiptoes to reach for the cupboard next to you and pulled out a clear glass. “Don’t you have a break for two weeks?”
“Yeah, I do. Doesn’t mean they’ll stop messaging me. There’s always work to be done.” You had fooled the organizer of a hybrid auction and hopefully everyone attending it, you could lie to Yoongi.
Yoongi poured the orange juice into the glass and took a sip. “So you don’t have a break.”
“I do have a break,” you said. “I just have to get some simple things ready for when filming starts. And there is Paper Hearts as well.”
“That doesn’t sound like much of a break.” He leaned back against the counter. “Isn’t it the definition of a break that you’re going to be taking a break from whatever work you’re doing?”
“Think of it more like a school break,” you said. Your school days weren’t as vivid in your head as they had once been but you could remember this. “It’s a break and I’m supposed to rest but I’m also supposed to be doing homework and have it ready by the end of the break.”
Yoongi looked at you over his glass. “And who decides that?”
“The teachers?”
He rolled his eyes. “Not for students. For you.”
“It’s more like something unspoken. When they need something they will email me. But most of the work I know by myself that I have to do it, I don’t need anyone telling me.” Suddenly you remembered your tea. “Damn.” You pulled out the ball strainer from your cup. You should have pulled it out three minutes ago. The tea would be too bitter, you would have to add some honey and hope it saved it.
“Tea time?” Yoongi asked.
“Yeah,” you said, sipping on the black tea. Far too bitter. “That definitely needs honey. Where is it?” You searched through the cupboards for it. With seven people living in the house items were often misplaced.
Yoongi placed a jar of honey in front of you. “Here. Jin reorganized these two cupboards while you were gone. He put everything that’s in a jar in this one.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” Before you could take it, Yoongi opened it for you. “Thanks.” You dipped a teaspoon in and swirled it around in your cup. He watched you while you prepared your tea and snatched one of the last two cinnamon rolls. It was proof of how many cinnamon rolls Jin had made that there were still a few left. You tried sipping on the tea again. “That’s much better.”
A smile played at the edges of his lips. “Good.”
Not knowing what else to say, you picked up your cinnamon roll and your cup of tea. “I’m going to the garden to read a little. You’re welcome to join me.”
“Okay,” he said and followed you down the stairs.
You stopped at the library and picked the first book that piqued your attention, a fantasy novel you had heard a lot about. In the garden, you went to your usual spot under the large tree. Yoongi stretched out on the bench, crossed his arms, and crossed his eyes.
Reading the first few pages, you were struggling to focus. You were going over and over the text your mother had sent you. Her daughter dating a billionaire’s son was exactly what she would love to brag about to her friends. Not that it was ever going to happen. Even thinking about it made your skin crawl.
You would have to turn her down but you didn’t have any excuse. You weren’t dating, you hadn’t dated anyone since you broke up with Jacob. Except… There was Namjoon. And now Jin. But you weren’t dating, you were… You didn’t know what you were doing. You had tried to discuss it with Namjoon and he had talked about pack and bonds and you got distracted. What were you doing? What were you? Pack was a word you still couldn’t understand completely and you were human, you needed something more concrete.
Your mother’s words from the gala came back to you, ‘Don’t put all of your energy into hybrids. It just isn’t the same. Whatever some people like to say, hybrids are hybrids. They are different from us, they are on a different level. You can’t have the same connection with someone you own’. She was wrong on most accounts but there was one part that was bothering you. In the papers, you owned them. You never felt like that was the truth though but regardless, the power dynamics weren’t balanced.
And what was it that they said about proximity? Namjoon and Jin might be attracted to you because of proximity. They were isolated, the Castle was in the middle of nowhere and they rarely went out. They didn’t meet any new people other than the ones they met through you which admittedly weren’t many and were mostly your coworkers.
“Stop thinking so loud,” Yoongi drawled, his eyes still closed. “Read your book.”
You looked back at the pristine white page and started reading. It jumped straight into the action, the story coming alive in front of your eyes.
♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩
 Yoongi dimmed the lights. Hoseok had turned on the TV in their room to a random channel. A movie from the 80s was on. Hoseok wasn’t watching, busying himself with putting their washed and ironed clothes in the wardrobe. Yoongi had offered to help but Hoseok had shaken his head saying they weren’t many and he could do it by himself.
“How is Taehyung?” he asked eventually.
Hoseok smoothed his hands down one of Yoongi’s shirts. “He’s… better.”
Taehyung hadn’t shown up for dinner. Hoseok hadn’t either. He had stayed with him in his room and they had eaten dinner there. It had been Hoseok’s idea. In his room, Taehyung would feel safer and he would be less overwhelmed. The tiger hybrid had been wary at first, they had to call you to get your permission before he agreed.
“I showed him how to use the TV and… he looked like a little kid. I know he tried to not show it but his whole face lit up. It was…” Hoseok looked at their TV. On the screen, a girl with puffy blond hair was smoking a cigarette. “He looked at it like it was a small miracle.”
He put the last few shirts in the closet and stared at his hands resting on his thighs.
“He’s so young,” he said like he was grieving. “He must have been a kid when they got him.”
Yoongi sat up in his bed, the sheets pooling around his waist. “It’s easier to condition someone younger.”
“Why are people so cruel, Yoongi?” he asked, his voice wavering.
Yoongi didn’t have an answer for him. “The world is a dark place.” Hoseok’s fluffy tail curled around his waist almost protectively. “But there is also light. Sometimes you have to go through the darkness to find the light. You have to fight for it.”
Yoongi’s light was right in front of him. He had found him at his lowest and clung to him with teeth and claws. Even at the darkest of times, his light was there, dim but present. In the safety of the Castle, it was bright every day.
Hoseok got up. “I’m going to cuddle you to sleep now.”
Yoongi groaned. He heard Hoseok chuckle before getting under the covers of his bed. Yoongi rolled to face the wall and Hoseok’s arms wrapped around his waist pulling him against his chest. His breath was warm on Yoongi’s neck and his scent of cinnamon and sandalwood filled his nostrils, mixing with his own. It was like a thick blanket thrown around him. Hoseok nosed along the back of his neck, rubbing more of his scent there. Yoongi was surrounded by Hoseok, his body, and his scent. He knew he needed this, he needed the closeness and the reassurance after everything that happened.
It was going to be hard but Yoongi was glad you had taken Taehyung with you. They would do nothing for him at the hybrid center, they wouldn’t know what to do with a hybrid who was so close to what they wanted but somehow wrong at the same time. He had heard the hesitance in your voice when you had told them you would hand him over to the police, Yoongi had hoped you wouldn’t.
“He’s going to get better,” Yoongi said. “He has you.”
“I don’t know how much I’m helping. I’m afraid I can’t do much.”
Yoongi placed his hands over Hoseok’s. “You can do enough. More than enough. Don’t doubt yourself.”
“It’s difficult not to.”
“Not impossible,” Yoongi said closing his eyes.
♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩ ♩♪♩♬♬♩♪♩
 You weren’t avoiding them. You lived in the same house and you had lunch and dinner with them and then you’d watched a movie in the cinema room. Tomorrow you would be with them anyway. And you all knew Jimin and Jungkook were the clingiest and you had to stay close to them to keep them satisfied. So no, you weren’t avoiding Namjoon and Jin. But maybe you were.
You had promised yourself that you wouldn’t let your mother throw you into a hurricane again but the text had affected you more than you would admit. She never gave much thought to you, why couldn’t you do the same?
Jimin would probably sleep in your room tonight. After you came back from trips he would spend at least the first three nights you were back in your bed. When he was there, when you weren’t alone, you could sleep better.
There was a knock on the door.
“Come in,” you called.
But it wasn’t Jimin. It was Namjoon in black shorts and a maroon tank top.
“Hey there,” you said, sliding the part of the glass wall that served as the balcony door closed. You had been outside earlier, watching the flames from the fire pits rise into the night and disappear.
“Hey. Are you getting ready for sleep?” he asked.
You were wearing your pajamas and it was too late to be doing anything else.
“I’m ready, I’m waiting for Jimin.”
“He and Jungkook are caught up in the middle of a competition. Don’t ask me what competition, I have no idea. So he might be a little late.”
You went to sit on your bed, it hadn’t been disrupted all day. Bouts of sleepiness had come and gone but you had refused to take a nap and fall victim to the worst kind of jet lag.
“That’s okay, I’m not sleepy yet. I can wait. Unless he isn’t coming. If he isn’t planning on sleeping here, I would very much like to know”
“I’m sure he isn’t going to miss the chance to sleep in your bed,” Namjoon said, sitting next to you. “He always says that your bed is the most comfortable in the house and he would sleep in it every night if he could.”
“All the mattresses are the same, I was the one who ordered them.” Taylor had recommended a shop and you had gone in together to find the most comfortable ones.
“He knows that, doesn’t care,” Namjoon said.
Your bed wasn’t more comfortable than any other beds, Jimin could have found a better excuse.
“How are you?” Namjoon asked gently. “It was a difficult day today. A few difficult days for you.”
You tucked your legs underneath you, contemplating how to answer. “It feels a little like a dream, like something that couldn’t have happened in real life. But at the same time, it’s too real. I can still feel the fear of being discovered and see the red of the room.” You shuddered. “I hope to forget it as soon as I can. It isn’t something that can be forgotten easily but I can try to forget the details.”
Like the strong musky cologne Hyungjoon was wearing. The multicolored fan one woman was carrying. The blue folder the woman behind the desk had pulled out the documents from.
“I feel like I’ve been sleepwalking all day. Which is weird because a lot of things happened today. And I did many things. But yeah… Sleepwalking. I have also lost track of what day today is. For me today started when the clock hit midnight at the auction. That’s my today.”
Namjoon placed his hand on your thigh. “I’m here if you want to talk. It will help if you share your thoughts with someone. I can see that your mind isn’t completely here.”
“I’m worried,” you admitted. “About Taehyung. I can’t even communicate with him and I can’t expect him to learn a new language when he’s already so overwhelmed. I’m afraid I made a wrong decision but I have no idea what the right one was.”
Namjoon cradled your cheek, turning your head to face him. “Listen to me. You didn’t make the wrong choice. The circumstances didn’t leave you with many options and you did the best you could. You made the decision that ensured that both you and Taehyung were safe and that’s the best decision you could make.
“Taehyung will get better,” he continued. “He will get adjusted and we will help him every step of the way. And if he decides he doesn’t want to be here anymore, we’ll find a solution then. Isn’t that what we’ve been doing all this time?”
How many times have you been in similar situations these past few months? There was Jin and then Yoongi and Hoseok and before everyone else Namjoon, Jimin and Jungkook. Everyone had started from there and no one had left. But Taehyung was different, he was fragile in a way none of them had been.
“We are together,” Namjoon assured you.
“We are,” you repeated.
He leaned in and pecked your lips. It was a simple touch of lips, short and sweet, but your whole nervous system lit up like a Christmas tree. Underneath the lightshow, your mind was buzzing with a million questions.
You pulled away, already missing his touch. “Namjoon, what are we doing? What are we?”
Please comment and reblog it motivates me to keep writing
777 notes · View notes
jeonygi · a month ago
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mother knows best | index
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pairing ; ot7 x female reader (platonic), ot7 moms & female reader
summary ; being the only woman in a friend group with seven men automatically makes you the love interest in seven mothers’ wistful romantic stories. though your relationship with the guys remains completely platonic, the marriage fantasy their moms frequently project onto you and their sons has them coming up with all sorts of shenanigans to make you their daughter-in-law. mother knows best, you suppose.
warnings ; overbearing moms, attempts at humor, platonic
note ; oh to be the bangtan moms’ favorite <33
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drabble 1 ; sunday lunch
drabble 2 ; of quail eggs and perms
drabble 3 ; of hair styles and scissors
drabble 4 ; of tangerines and dumplings
drabble 5 ; mafia game
drabble 6 ; code red
drabble 7 ; father knows best
drabble 8 ; a solemn day
drabble 9
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543 notes · View notes
angelsthetics · 10 days ago
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bts scenarios | protecting you from another man
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pairing | individual bts members x reader
genre | angst, fluff
warning/s | some very disgusting men, sexist remarks, stalking, swearing, minor unwanted physical contact
word count | 5.54k words (I definitely got carried away WHOOPS)
lee’s notes | we may not always have a bts member to protect us but please please always be mindful of your surroundings and those around you! ask for help if you need it <3
go to | home / m. list / faq
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— k. seokjin 
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“Hyung, another drink?” Jungkook asks, standing up from his seat.
They were currently celebrating winning Artist of the Year at a fancy steakhouse somewhere in the middle of Seoul. The restaurant was classy, and it had a separate bar where everyone could go for drinks. Being a bar; however, people naturally remained in the area to mingle with one another.
BTS, wanting to enjoy the night without any kinds of disruptions, decided to rent out a part of the restaurant to themselves with a nice minibar just for them. 
“Huh?” Seokjin says, looking at Jungkook.
“I’m going to the minibar for another beer. Want me to get you some?” Jungkook asks, grabbing his glass.
“Yes please, thanks JK.” Seokjin says, giving Jungkook a thankful smile before continuing to look around the restaurant.
His seat was the closest to the open bar, so he got the clearest view of what was mostly going on in the area. It was the usual high-class mingling, with people just talking to one another to try and make more social connections.
You; however, stood out to Seokjin. You looked clearly uncomfortable while trying to seemingly leave a conversation with a much older man. Seokjin’s eyebrows furrowed as he slowly sits up from his seat, the sound of the chair causing you to look his way.
Your eyes immediately widen once you catch Seokjin’s eyes, and he could almost see the desperation in your eyes once you make eye contact. Thinking that this was your way out, you politely smile to the man you were talking to politely and begin to walk in Seokjin’s direction.
“Sunbae, thank god. I thought you weren’t coming!” You exclaim, a small smile on your face as you pretend to know him as you walk up to him. Unfortunately for you, the man you were talking to still follows you, clearly not getting the message.
Seokjin sees this and stands up, walking towards you with a small smile. Once you notice this, you’re quickly relieved as you think he’s going to help you. However, before you could actually exchange words, a security guard comes between you guys.
“Ma’am, I’m sorry but this area is restricted.” He tells you, straight-faced, making you frown. But before you reply, Seokjin clears his throat and puts his hand on the guard’s shoulder.
“Hi, no worries. She’s with me.” Seokjin says, causing the security guard’s eyes to widen as he steps aside. 
“Sorry, miss. Feel free to come through.” The guard says, and you look up at him, clearly surprised, as he leads you into their booth.
“Hey! I’m with her.” The guy following you says, making Seokjin’s eyebrows furrow. 
He gently grabs the your hand and guides you behind him before proceeding to glare at the guy.
“I said, she’s with me. You can leave now.” Seokjin says, the tone of his voice alarming the security guard. He looks at you three and gets a grip of what’s going on, quickly turning on his radio.
“I have a man here who’s making the VIPs uncomfortable. I need him out of the premises immediately.” He says, making you and Seokjin sigh in relief.
The guard nods at you and Seokjin and guides the older man outside. Once they’re out of sight, you quickly turn to Seokjin with an almost concerned expression.
“Thank you so much. God—I’m so sorry, I didn’t think you were a VIP or anything, I promise. I swear I’ll leave once—”
“Hey, it’s ok. You can stay here if you’d like.” Seokjin says with a reassuring expression, making you sigh in relief and give him a grateful smile.
After a few seconds of silence, Seokjin clears his throat, causing you to look at him.
“Say, have you had dinner yet?” Seokjin asks, nodding to the dinner table behind them. 
You let out a small laugh and smile at Seokjin, shaking your head.
“Are you asking me to eat with you?” You ask, Seokjin shrugging with a smile.
“Maybe, but unlike the other man, I’d be happy to get you a separate table if you refuse.” Seokjin says.
You let out a small grin, a breathy chuckle leaving your mouth as you shyly nod your head.
“Well, I’d love to have dinner with you, Mr. VIP.”
— m. yoongi
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“Alright, who’s next?” Sejin asks, Yoongi raising his hand up as he gets up from his seat.
“This way, sir.” The nurse says with a smile, Yoongi giving a polite smile in return before following her lead.
BTS were all currently at a hospital getting checked up. They had a concert in a few days and HYBE wanted to make sure they were all free from any illnesses and injuries before making them perform.
As Yoongi follows the nurse’s lead, he suddenly hears a commotion from a station near them.
“Sir, you don’t understand. The drugs you gave your son weren’t in the correct dosage. That’s why his body went into shock.” You reason, your expression, from Yoongi’s view, looking almost—fearful?
“No, I refuse to believe this happened because of me! So don’t you dare come here with your fucking medical degree telling me otherwise!” The father screams, causing other people to look at them.
Yoongi’s eyebrows furrow as he watches the scene unfold, the nurse leading him to the check up room now long gone as she called for help.
“I’m sure you’re a great father, sir. But you need to understand that we’re just telling you this so it doesn’t happen again.” You explain, placing your clipboard onto the table.
The man groans loudly and glares at you before slamming his fist onto the table, causing some of the patients to gasp. You slowly begin to back away from him, fear evident in your eyes
“You’re the one who needs to understand that I would never do something like this to my son! You’re probably just trying to cover up your own ass, aren’t you, huh? You did something wrong while helping my son and now your scared your gonna get fired so you blame it on me!” The father exclaims, jabbing a finger into your shoulder, causing you to tumble backwards towards the table behind you.
At this point, Yoongi is alarmed at what he’s watching. As much as he hates bringing attention to himself, he decided to walk towards the scene to help you. 
“Sir, please. If you could just calm down for one moment—” You say before the man lunges forward and cuts you off.
“Don’t tell me to calm down, you bitch!” He exclaims, raising his hand to hit you.
You close your eyes, knowing there’s nothing else to do but take the impact of the hit. But, it never comes. Your eyes slowly open and widen at the sight in front of you.
Yoongi, now standing between you and the father, grasps the man’s wrist tight as he stares at him with a glare.
“She’s helping your kid and that’s how you repay her?” Yoongi asks almost sarcastically, his other hand lightly pushing your waist as if to push you behind him.
Before he could talk more sense into the man; however, the nurse returns with 2 security guards behind her. They quickly take the man into custody and assure the patients that the commotion is over while you and Yoongi walk off scene, both sighing with relief.
“Thank you so much. I don’t know how I could ever repay you.” You say, making Yoongi let out a small smile and shake his head.
“It’s nothing, no worries. Just, promise me you’ll stay away from men like that, please.” Yoongi says, making you bite your lip and chuckle.
“Will do, uh—“ You say. before pausing as you realized you never caught his name.
But before you could ask, the nurse in-charge interrupts your conversation.
“Dr. (L/N)? The other attending just arrived. He heard about what happened and says he’s more than willing to take over the rest of the check-ups if you want to head home early.” The nurse says, Yoongi making the connection.
“Oh, you’re the doctor checking me up?“ Yoongi asks, you blinking as you also begin realize.
“Oh! Well, Ms. Kim, please tell the other attending he can start checking up the remaining patients. I’ll consult with 1 more before calling it a day.” You say, causing Yoongi to let out a small smile.
The nurse, now catching on at what was happening, looks at you with a knowing look on her face.
“Right away, Dr.”
— j. hoseok
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You walked into one of the many hallways of HYBE, looking for the nearest front desk. You were recently called to meet with Bang PD about an open choreography position for the company. 
Unfortunately for you, they neglected to give you directions or names for who to talk to once you got to the building, which was why you were currently wandering around the building, clearly lost.
After what seemed like forever, you finally spot a man sitting in his open office. He was typing on his laptop while simultaneously writing on a piece of paper. Not sure if you could interrupt, you decide to just walk to the door and knock, causing the man to look up.
He looks at you for a few seconds, as if trying to study you, until he swiftly stands up with a smile. 
“Hi, may I help you?” The man asks, you giving him a small polite smile.
“Uhm—I’m trying to look for Bang PD’s office?” You reply, causing the man to chuckle and nod.
“Oh, no worries. I get lost all the time too.” He says with a laugh as he leaves his table and walks towards you.
“I can walk you there if you’d like, wouldn’t want a pretty girl like you to get even more lost.” The man adds with a wink, making you let out a forced laugh.
If there was one thing your friends knew about you, it was that you never a fan of randomly socializing with strangers—let along flirt with them. But if this was your only way to get directions to Bang PD’s office, then well, you didn’t really have a choice.
“Oh, it’s alright. You can just tell me which floor I need to go to and I can just ask someone there. I’d hate to bother you, especially since you looked pretty busy when I knocked.” You reply, clearly trying to avoid making him go with you. Unfortunately for you, the man could not take a hint.
“No worries, pretty. My work can wait. You meanwhile, well, it’s not every day nice girls like you come strolling into my office.” He says, giving you another wink. You almost pale at his remark before scanning the area around you, trying to look for someone else you could approach.
“You know what? I think I actually remember Bang sending me directions in his email. I’m gonna go to a place with better signal to check.” You reply, giving the man a forced smile as discomfort started to creep into your system.
As you look sideways to grab your phone, you makes eye contact with a man wearing a mask and a hat and your eyes immediately widen, pleading him to help you.
Hoseok, the man in the mask, sees this and begins to get a grip of what’s going on. He quickly walks towards you and hears what the man has to reply.
“There’s no need for that, pretty. Just come with me and I promise to show you the way.” He says, making your eyes widen as you begins to shake your head.
“Hey, she said no. Back off, will you?” Hoseok says, walking between you and the man. 
The man looks at Hoseok with furrowed eyebrows and stands his ground.
“Young man, I don’t remember talking to you. This is between me and the nice lady behind you.” He says, making Hoseok scoff.
He takes his hat off as well as his mask, and the man’s eyes widen.
“I think it’ll be my business when I tell Bang there’s a man as disgusting as you roaming the halls of my building.” Hoseok says, almost glaring at the man in front of him.
“And doing it to (Y/N) at that? Do you have any idea how long me and Bang have been trying to get her to join HYBE? And what? You were just gonna sabotage all that to stroke your ego?” Hoseok adds, cornering the man into a wall.
You’re shocked at Hoseok’s remark, surprised he even knew who you were. Meanwhile, the man was practically shaking, his 2 hands immediately clasping together.
“H-Hoseok-ssi, I am so sorry. I promise I had no idea—” The man says, making Hoseok let out a sarcastic laugh.
“Wrong answer, man. The fact that you would even willingly treat a woman like that is enough for me to talk to Bang about this.” Hoseok says, shaking his head.
Before letting the man speak more, Hoseok gently grabs your hand and brings you to the elevator lobby, making sure to glare at the man one last time.
“I suggest you start figuring out how you want to explain this to Bang, that’s if, he even gives you a chance to explain of course.” Hoseok says sarcastically before the elevator doors open.
He walks in and motions you to follow him, you nervously looking at Hoseok and the man way behind you guys before joining him inside.
As the doors close, Hoseok lets out a sigh and scratches the back of his head,  turning to you with an apologetic smile.
“Sorry about him, I promise that the rest of our staff are much more respectful.” Hoseok says, making you let out a relieved laugh as you smile back at him.
“I don’t doubt it. Thank you so much for what you did back there. And uhm—about what you said..” You reply, your voice trailing off at the end. 
“All of it was true. Me and Bang have been trying to contact you for months. So you can just imagine the horror I felt when I saw that was happening downstairs.” Hoseok explains, causing you to blush.
“I’m a huge fan of yours, thank you so much for saying that.” You mumble, Hoseok laughing in reply.
“No, thank you for accepting the offer to meet with us. Fair warning though, I don’t think me and Bang can take no for an answer for the choreography position.” Hoseok warns playfully, you now letting out a laugh as well.
“Well, as long as there aren’t any other people like the one we saw downstairs, I think you’ll be seeing me much more often.” (Y/N) replies with a small smile, Hoseok returning it with a much wider one.
“That’s great news! Oh, and no worries, I don't think you'll have to worry about any other rude people coming at you.” Hoseok says with a smirk, making (Y/N) let out another laugh.
“Why’s that?” (Y/N) replies playfully as the elevator doors open.
“Well, you’ll be working with ENHYPEN, TXT, and, BTS. I don’t think anyone will have the guts to treat you that way once they find out who you’re working with.” Hoseok teases, letting her get off the elevator first before adding,
“And, well, they’ll have to get through me first.”
— k. namjoon
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“Hyung! There’s someone at the door!” Jimin shouts from the bathroom, causing Namjoon to stand up with a groan.
“I got it.” Namjoon replies loudly, rubbing his face before walking to the door.
They were currently in LA for the American Music Awards, but since it wasn’t for another 2 days, they were given the day-off today to do whatever they wanted to.
Before Namjoon opened the door, he decided to look through the peephole just to be sure he wasn’t just opening the door to anyone. However, he was very puzzled when the lady at the door was definitely not room service. 
It was (Y/N) (L/N), the actress that everyone was currently obsessed with, him included. What were you doing at their door? Namjoon wondered before peeking again.
This time, he noticed that you weren’t alone. Behind you was another man, about your age, holding a bouquet of flowers as he continued to try and converse with you.
Namjoon just scratches his head in confusion, trying to recall if they were expecting anyone. But before he could ask the other guys, the doorbell rings again.
Ah, screw it. Namjoon thinks, deciding to just open the door as he realizes that the security would probably not have let you guys through if you were threat to their safety.
Once he opens the door, he sees the sudden relief in your eyes when they met his. As he opens his mouth to say something, you cut him off by mouthing the words help me as your eyes move to the man beside you.
“Uh—Hi, (Y/N).” Namjoon says, the confusion slightly evident in the tone of his voice.
“Namjoon, so good to see you! I was just in the area and was hoping I could come by and say hi to you and the other members.” You reply with a smile, clearly acting like this wasn’t the first time you met.
Namjoon slowly begins to get the message and he opens the door a bit wider, returning your smile.
“Well, come in! I'm sure they’ll be happy to see you.” Namjoon says, playing along.
The man beside you frowns as this, and suddenly grasps your upper arm, making you gasp. 
“Hey, what about me?” He asks, his eyebrows furrowed as you attempt to get out of his grip.
“I told you to stay away from me. What part of that can’t you understand?” You plead loudly to the man, but he only frowns and tightens his grip.
“Hey, she said to stay away.” Namjoon says, grabbing the man’s hand and pulling it off your arm.
Once he lets go of you, you immediately rush beside Namjoon who gladly brings you behind him as he glares at the man. The guy tries to lunge forward to get you but before he could, a security guard shows up and grabs onto the man.
“Sir, I heard the commotion. Is he bothering you?” The guard says, Namjoon looking at you.
“P-Please lead him out of the building.” You reply, the guard nodding and bowing to both of you before leading the man to the elevator.
Namjoon brings you into their room and closes the door behind them before letting you take a seat on the couch.
“You okay?” He asks, taking a seat in front of you.
“Yeah, sorry about that. That guy’s been following me since I finished at the gym. I just couldn’t call my manager because I accidentally left all my stuff in my room. I stay in the room connected to this though, so as soon as I can call for another keycard I can get out of your hair.” You explain, Namjoon nodding with a smile.
“No problem, feel free to take your time. Besides—I’m a huge fan so I’d love to pick your brain about some of the movies you’ve been in so far while you wait, if that’s alright.” Namjoon says with a chuckle, making you smile.
Little did you both know, the conversation lasted for more than an hour, with the 2 of you too distracted with each other to realize how much time had passed.
— p. jimin
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“Hey man, fun night?” Jimin’s friend, Jaehyuk teases, making him groan as he gets out of bed, his head throbbing.
“What time is it?” Jimin mumbles, making Jaehyuk laugh.
“It’s almost 1PM, dude.” He replies, making Jimin’s eyes widen as he groans again.
“I’m never drinking with you ever again.” Jimin mumbles, grabbing his phone from the nightstand.
Jaehyuk invited him over for a drink at his house when he came back from the U.S., and they ended up drinking so much that they both knocked out by the end of the night.
“There’s some painkillers in the kitchen. Water’s there too.” Jaehyuk says, patting Jimin’s head as he opens the door to the bathroom.
“Thanks.” Jimin replies, getting out of bed and stretching.
“Oh—and before I forget, my roommate came back from his parent’s house today. So just beware and stuff, he’s kind of an ass.” His friend says, making Jimin chuckle.
“I’m aware. Met him myself a few months ago, remember?” Jimin replies, Jaehyuk scoffing.
“Right. Well, I ordered some soup from our neighbor’s grandmother. She should be coming over soon to deliver it. Keep a close eye on her, okay? Roomie tends to get a bit—douchey when she’s around.” Jaehyuk explains, Jimin nodding.
“Got it.” He replies, giving his friend a reassuring smile before walking out to the kitchen to get some painkillers.
Once he got to the kitchen; however, the doorbell rang. Jimin quickly gulps down the painkillers with a glass of water and rushes to the door, only to stand in defeat when he sees that his friend’s roommate beat him to it.
“Good morning!” You greet, looking up to the door with a smile.
“Aw, hi doll, wanted to come see me before you left for work?” The roommate teases you, making your smile drop to a frown immediately.
“Oh, sorry, I didn’t know it was you.” You reply with a sigh before grabbing the container from your bag.
“Here, could you give this to Jaehyuk? Tell him he can just leave the containers outside halmeoni’s doorstep.” You say, handing him the soup container.
“Sure, doll. Do you have anything for me?” Roommate teases, making Jimin scoff from afar while he watches.
You just sigh and shake your head, about to turn around and leave when roommate suddenly grabs your hand.
“Hey!” You exclaim, not liking the sudden contact. 
“If I ask you a question, you’re supposed to answer it, doll.” He replies teasingly as you try and take your hand out of his grip.
“Stop calling me doll. And I don’t have to answer you!” You reply, trying to pull your hand from his grip. Roommate laughs and shakes his head, pulling you closer to him.
“Dude, you’re making her uncomfortable.” Jimin finally says once he realizes how far the guy’s going.
Roommate scoffs once he sees Jimin and rolls his eyes, while you look at Jimin confused, wondering who he was and why you’ve never seen him before.
“What, Jaehyuk asked you to keep an eye on me?” Roommate teases, Jimin now the one rolling his eyes as he forcefully grabs roommate’s arm, causing the latter to let go of you.
“Hey!” Roommate says before Jimin pushes him into the wall beside them.
“If you put your hands on her, on on any other girl, again for that matter, I’m reporting you to the police.” Jimin threatens, making roommate scoff.
“What—think they’re going to believe you just because you’re some worldwide artist?” Roommate teases, causing Jimin to smirk.
“You don’t know what I’m capable of doing.” Jimin says, the roommate glaring at him before pushing him away.
“Get away from me.” He mumbles before walking back into the house, Jimin scoffing and rolling his eyes.
He turns towards you, his eyes softening as he gets the soup container from you.
“Sorry about him.” He says, watching as you give him a comforting smile.
“It’s alright, not like it’s the first time anyways.” You say with a sad laugh, making Jimin frown as he sees you rub your wrist.
“Did he hurt you?” Jimin asks softly, opening his other hand as if to ask for your wrist. You hesitantly give it to him, showing him the small bruises that were on your wrist.
“That bastard.” Jimin mumbles, clenching his jaw as he puts down the soup container on a nearby table.
“This won’t do. Here, uh—why don’t we go to the convenience store? I’ll go and get you a cold compress.” Jimin says, making you shake your head.
“Oh no, that’s alright. I would hate to hassle you more than I already have.” You reply, giving Jimin a small smile.
“No, I don’t mind, no worries.” Jimin replies with a reassuring smile before stepping outside.
— k. taehyung
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“Hello? May I help you, sir?” You ask politely as you answer the telephone.
“Hi (Y/N), I just wanted to inform you that I’ll be in a video conference for the next hour or so. So, please inform any incoming visitors that I’ll only be able to entertain them by the end of the day if they’re willing to wait.” Bang PD says through the phone.
“Alright, sir. I’ll take note of that.” (Y/N) says, writing it down on a post-it note and sticking it onto her monitor.
“Thanks, (Y/N).” Bang PD says before hanging up.
You’ve been working as Bang PD’s secretary for almost a year now. Today was no different than any other day, with you just sitting on the desk in front of his office as you usually helped him organize documents.
Suddenly, someone walks through the elevator and goes straight to your table, looking like he was in a big hurry.
“Hi sir, may I help you?” You ask, and the man looks at you and sighs.
“I need to see Mr. Bang regarding an urgent manner.” He replies, causing you to frown as you recall what Bang PD told you moments ago.
“Sorry, sir. But Mr. Bang has given me strict instructions that he is not to be bothered until his video conference is finished. If you’re willing to wait, he should be done in a few hours.” You reply, making the man scoff.
“Didn’t you understand what I just said? I said it was an urgent matter.” He says, making you sigh.
“Yes sir, I understand. But once again, I would just like to inform you that Mr. Bang has informed me that no one is to come into his office until—”
“What do you not understand about the word urgent? I need to see him now.” The man repeats, and you purse your lips into a line as you attempt to address the situation calmly.
“Sir, if you could just calm down and take a seat. I promise you that as soon as Mr. Bang can see you, you’ll be able to enter his office.” You reply, the man rolling his eyes in response.
“Did you just ask me to sit down? Miss, do you even know who you’re speaking to?” The man exclaims loudly, surprising you.
“You’re new, aren’t you? Well, I see Bang all the time, okay? And each time, he just lets me come in. Why am I suddenly not allowed to today?” The man says, his voice now much louder than how it was when he first arrived.
You just sigh in response and bring out your phone, about to call security to help you with the situation when someone suddenly clears their throat. You and the man both look to the source of the sound and your eyes widen when you see Taehyung standing there, glaring at the man.
“Sir, I’m sorry but you’re causing a scene and at the rate you’re going, the whole building is going to know about your predicament.” Taehyung says, making the man scoff.
“Young man, I don’t know who you are or why you’re here, but I think you’ve misunderstood. I just want to speak to Bang, but this lady over here won’t let me!” The man remarks, making Taehyung eye him as he walks towards them.
"Sir, I’m giving you 2 options. Either you calm down and take a seat or I call security.” Taehyung says.
The man glares at Taehyung for a few seconds before turning around and rushing to Bang PD’s office. Once you realized what he was doing, you rushed toward him and blocked him from entering the door.
“Sir, please—” You say before getting cut-off as he moves towards you, about to push you out of the way when Taehyung grabs the man’s arm and pulls him away from you.
He nods towards the 2 security guards behind him and they both grab the man before escorting him out.
“Bang will hear about this and you’ll both get fired!” The man shouts before the elevator closes, making Taehyung scoff and shake his head.
“You okay? That was a close one there.” Taehyung says, looking at you as his expression begins to soften.
“Yes, I’m alright. Thank you so much, Taehyung-ssi.” You reply, giving him a small smile.
“No problem, I was just making sure you were safe.” Taehyung says, giving you a smile as the tips of his ears begin to turn red.
“Well, you did a very good job at doing just that.” You say with a giggle.
He grins at this before walking and taking a seat in front of your table, puzzling you.
“Taehyung-ssi?” You ask, confused by his action.
“I think I’ll stay here for a bit. You know, in case you need me to make sure you’re safe again.”
— j. jeongguk
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“Thank you so much for all your support.” Jungkook says with a big smile as he lets go of the hand of the fan in front of him.
“I love you so much, oppa! Hang in there!” The fan replies, making Jungkook grin before she moves onto the next member.
BTS was currently having their first fan meeting for Map of the Soul: Persona and Jungkook could not be more excited to be meet with all the ARMYs. After saying goodbye to the previous fan, he quickly grabs the album of the next fan and signs it, forgetting to make eye contact with the fan in front of him first.
You just stare at Jungkook, struck at how ethereal he looks in person, unable to remember what you practiced in the car before coming to the fan meeting. Jungkook realizes how quiet you are and looks up at you after signing your album, his eyes slightly widening once he makes eye contact with you.
You both blush and look elsewhere for a few seconds until Jungkook clears his throat and looks at you.
“What’s your name?” He asks with a small smile, the tips of his ears a clear shade of pink.
“I’m (Y/N).” You reply as he smiles wider.
“You have a very pretty name, (Y/N).” He says, making you blush more as he gains the courage to intertwine your hands.
“T-Thank you.” You mumble, pausing for a few moments before letting out a sigh as you can’t recall what you were supposed to say.
“Is something wrong?” Jungkook asks, frowning slightly.
“Ah, I just can’t seem to recall what I was supposed to tell you. I had it all practiced before coming here.” You say sheepishly, making him laugh out loud.
“Aigoo, you’re so cute, (Y/N).” He says, ruffling your hair. 
“You don’t need to say anything, honestly. Just your presence is enough.” Jungkook continues, hands caressing yours as he laughs at how flustered you are.
“I don't know what to say.” You mumble, making Jungkook laugh.
“Excuse me, you need to move the to the next member, miss.” The staff member behind Jungkook says, causing both of you to frown.
Ignore him. Jungkook mouths to you with a wink, making you smile and nod. He continues caressing your hands and conversing with you, not noticing the staff member behind him nod to the security guard behind you.
The guard nods back and clears his throat, slowly grasping both of your shoulders to gently to push you to the next member. 
“I’m actually from—hey!” You exclaim, Jungkook’s eyebrows furrowing as he sees what the guard’s doing.
“Hey, let go of her!” Jungkook says, standing up to pull the guard’s hands away from you.
At this point, most of the members were also looking at them, trying to figure out what was going on. Taehyung, the member nearest to them, catches on and stands up, placing his hand on Jungkook’s shoulder.
“It’s alright, Kook.” Taehyung says, Jungkook still glaring at the security guard.
“You don’t touch people without their permission.” Jungkook mumbles, shaking his head at the security guard and the staff member before sitting down again.
He writes something on your album before passing it to Taehyung, looking at you apologetically.
“I’m sorry about that.” Jungkook says and you give him a reassuring smile.
“It’s okay, thank you for looking out for me.” You reply, and Jungkook smiles at you.
You move onto Taehyung and take a seat, confused at the smirk on his face.
“Hi?” You say, and he grins and shakes his head.
“He likes you.” Taehyung teases, and you scoff and shake your head.
“Jungkook? Liking me? What?” You whisper, making Taehyung laugh.
“Check his page when you get to your car.” He says, winking at you.
...
You get into your car and sigh in relief before bringing out your album. After turning a few pages, you can only laugh, in shock at what was written in front of you.
Thanks for coming today. Call me, please !!! XXXX-XXX-XXXX
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hollyhomburg · a month ago
Text
Before I Leave You (Pt.17)
(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)
Summary: Things are often clearer the day after but if anything Taehyung only feels more confused about where she stands with you.
Pairing: Beta! Yoongi, Omega! Reader, Omega! Jungkook, Omega! Seokjin, Alpha! Namjoon, Alpha! Hoseok, Alpha! Taehyung, Alpha! Jimin,
Tags: fluff, hurt/comfort, nesting, scent marking, omegaspace, heavily implied little space, a tiny bit of sexual content but not much, mentions of heat/rut cycles, seizure mention, medical conditions, possessive characters, trans! taehyung.
W/c: 10.0k
A/n: Things in my life have been kind of hard recently, I’m sorry the gaps are getting so large between chapters, Next chapter will be the sexual content. I know I keep saying that but it’s a promise this time! this chapter kinda feels not ready to post but I didn’t want to wait for another week!
Previous Part - Masterlist
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Jungkook has another seizure the day after you and Tae stay up. Whether it happened in the middle of the night while he was sleeping or maybe when he woke up sometime through the morning no one’s quite sure. 
They’re particularly tricky to catch when they happen that way- when the fever blur of Jungkook's subconscious gives way to a different kind of sensation, dream to seizure and seizure to dream and back again- all without waking.
Taehyung is a little thankful honestly and maybe that makes her a selfish asshole that she has this to contend with when she blinks awake, rather than thinking about what happened last night or the secret that lingers known by the two of you now.
An oppressive heavyweight that somehow- doesn't suffocate, like a blanket or a hug and not like a cage. A secret known by two people isn’t much of a secret at all. 
Jungkook doesn't stir from his carefully crafted half-circle, holding his bones like he's feeling their brittleness. He has the kind of half there lucidity and laconicism that they’ve all come to anticipate from his days post-seizure. The rest of the pack a buzz around the nest, Tae the last one to wake up.
Their coffees grow cold on the bedside table and Jimin’s arms are vice like around Jungkook’s middle. Cuddled into him from behind like the strength corded in his arms will be enough to make his omega safe.
“Did anyone wake up? did anyone notice anything at all” Namjoon asks, nearly forgetting to be quiet or else risk aggravating Jungkook’s panging headache.
The tense lilt to his voice betrays his hidden urgency as Jungkook keeps his eyes screwed as tight as possible. He’s tried to explain it to them countless times- the dizzy not quiet there feeling that fills his body after the seizures. Kind of similar to how it feels when you put on glasses with a prescription that’s not quite your own, only over your whole body.
Jungkook having seizures while asleep isn’t exactly normal- and it’s worrying, none of them know how long the seizure lasted and if it’s cause for concern. If his neurons are bursting apart at the seams, torn apart by something as simple as electronegativity.
Namjoon has dragged them to the hospital after a seizure like this on more than a few occasions but they never have been enough to warrant an overnight stay.  The pungent coffee liquor scent of the pack alpha’s displeasure stinks up the nest room until Jin pushes him out and in the direction of the shower. His scent will only aggravate Jungkook's nose and He’s barely started getting ready for work even though he has to be at the hospital in less than an hour.
A look at the clock says shit- Tae’s gonna be late if she doesn’t move soon either. but she transfixed by Jungkook’s head buried in the pillows. The way his soft curls fall over his face, too boyish to really be grown yet. Something in Tae’s heart gives a painful twinge.
The only people who can reliably mediate their scents into something not grating are Jin and Taehyung. Hobi’s already been kicked out of the nest it the thick smell of burning sugar is anything to go by. Jimin's treading on thin ice, the vanilla getting a smoky and pungent scent. louder and cacophonous alpha- angry alpha and distressed alpha meant to shock omegas system tell them to run and hide- tell them that some danger is near that-
“I’m fine Taetae” Jungkook’s voice is so weak, so exhausted from where he lies, Tae pulls himself closer too, trying to enswathe their omega to hopefully soothe him. Tae might be so tired and still half asleep that he can’t form his mouth into words but comforting kookie he could do in his sleep.
Taehyung occupies a more even position in the pack, dead set in the middle. neither takes his role as pup or Hyung seriously enough- except in times like this. He and Jin exchange a pregnant look and Tae senses the tremor in him, the barely controlled emotion hovering just below the surface.
Tae leans down, pressing a soft kiss against Jungkook’s curled fingers, “Sorry bunny lovely.” If anything happened to Jungkook Taehyung doesn’t know what she and the rest would do.
“Are you rearranging Koo’s schedule?” Jin nods cradling Jungkook’s phone in his hand and typing furiously. While Jimin rubs soothing circles down Jungkook’s back that any other morning would make Jungkook purr. Their youngest just covers his face from the little amount of light in the room to try and alleviate the pounding no doubt assaulting his cranium.
To Tae’s credit, when you walk in (with Yoongi carefully in toe) she does try not to look. Like staring would give something away about what transpired last night. She barely manages to act like nothing’s wrong- like nothing’s different.
Someone must have gotten up and told you what happened because both of you talk in a quiet hush, murmuring to each other softly until Jungkook gives a frustrated huff, kicking off the two hot blankets at his feet, “I'm post-seizure not post-death you can just talk to me you know.”
Jungkook tries not to sound annoyed as he flops back onto his back, opening himself up and turning his quite lethal puppy eyes on their beta. His body gives a treacherous shiver at the movement. Yoongi has never followed a call quicker, flopping down on the nest and pulling himself up and into Jungkook’s arms.
He kisses him softly on the forehead, crooning a quiet, “Sorry pup- just worried about you.” Yoongi’s concern bleeds into it, unable to tease him like usual when he’s so vulnerable. Jimin's so endeared he doesn't even look bothered that Yoongi strong-armed him out of the way. But maybe that's just because they both know that Yoongi's scent is the only thing that can help Jungkook after a seizure like that.
“Here- take my side Hyung,” Jimin and Yoongi rearrange themselves around Jungkook, who nuzzles into Yoongi like his scent is what he’s been waiting for, the trembling in his shoulders eases instantaneously, the magic of pheromones that only Yoongi can provide. Whatever effects it has on Jungkook’s symptoms, it must feel pretty good because he goes from tense to utterly pliant- like a puppet with its strings cut in just about two seconds.
They will no doubt be on Koo duty today, but it’s not like the rest of them wouldn’t love to stay home and look after their youngest. “I have to get ready for work” Tae unfortunately confesses. Hobi, Namjoon, and Jin are already tumbling through the room in various stages of undress. 
Hobi kicks his clothes across the floor, the frustration in his bones something Tae is intimately familiar with. All of the alphas know the distress that comes with it- leaving one of their pack mates vulnerable and alone when they’re so clearly needing comfort and protecting. 
Usually, Tae doesn’t feel his instincts as much, but today is different for some reason and Tae can’t shake it. It sucks, but they do have to go to work, and they’d take days off for this if they thought Jungkook needed them too.
He Doesn’t like feeling smothered, Jimin and Yoongi and you will be enough. 
But there are other things to fixate on; You don’t look upset that your mate is cuddling someone else, a small smile playing on your face as you lean against the doorframe watching Yoongi comfort their youngest. 
Tae almost wants to apologize for Jungkook’s boldness; Scenting another Person’s mate without their permission is considered a high offense. Tae considers himself good at reading people and it would be normal for you to get angry if you were like any other possessive mate but you’re not; there's not a hint of displeasure hidden in your face.
Taehyung lingers leaning opposite you in the doorway cautiously scenting the air for any sign of your discomfort from you but there isn’t any. Not your scent nor any hidden tenseness in your frame that betrays any sort of discomfort. If anything, you look like you might head back to bed, comfortable and sleepy enough that you lean up against the doorframe a little too heavily.
Jin drops a kiss on your forehead then Taehyung’s when he stumbles past, “I swear if anyone breaks their routine today, I’m going to absolutely have a fit, just a warning.”  
His button-down is completely undone displaying the generous line of his chest. not quite abs but not much more than a thin layer of fat over his body that has always made Jin simply delicious to the alphas, the omegas, and anyone who might dare to look at him. The first prickling’s of want stir in Tae’s gut, but she shakes it off
Really- what’s gotten into her this morning, everything feels disjointed and off- like someone turned the exposure up. 
“Go back to bed honey, we’ve got kookie.” You make a noise and offer Jin a sip of your coffee, which he takes making a face at the amount of sugar in it. 
“You sure? There isn’t anything I can make for him that will make him better?” your voice is so quiet, kind of strangled, you’re not non-verbal but you easily could be. 
Jin and Tae shake their heads sadly. Even Jungkook himself lets out a sad huff from the bed, “no- I’m just grumpy. It’s okay.”
Your thumb is hooked through a coffee cup (this pun mug reads: “I’m bear-ly awake,” with the image of a bear at an office desk). Tae lingers, pausing in the doorway to stare down at you, a hairs breath closer than she might have stood yesterday. Your smile conjures up images of flower petals and makeup brushes when You take a sip of your coffee, looking up at her with a smile that’s probably as sweet as your coffee, raising a single eyebrow.  
“Good morning?” you say, more of a question than a real greeting. Tae’s mouth is dry, words tangling and none of them the ones she wants to say, thank you for last night or hey do you want to do that again? can we curl up in each other and make a home out of these delicate bones?
But instead she blurts “you didn’t let me pick a mug for you today.” 
“You looked tired, they let you sleep,” let is maybe a little too gracious on your part, the others were probably so worried about Jungkook and distracted to wake him. As the clock sits now, Tae has barely enough time to get ready for work.
But she lingers in the doorway with you, doesn’t more to go get coffee of her own, just stands and watches the pack. how fluffy Hoseok’s hair gets when he runs a brush through it. You watch Jin hang the rest of his work outfit on the back of the door and decent, upon their shared skincare routine pile with a muted vigor. While Jimin and Yoongi encircle Jungkook at the centre of the nest. The pup carefully cradled between them and soothed with soft words- a special kind of music just out of earshot. 
But Taehyung watches you more than he watches the others. The way you sway softly, the curl of your lips over your coffee mug- everything. maybe that’s how he notices when you freeze, eyes fixating on something. 
You have not been granted the ability to control your scent like the others- just like Hoseok and Namjoon it bursts from you like a wave. Maybe it’s the damage to your mating mark but either way, it sours but then flickers back to life, a thick blanket of cake, not quite vanilla but a warmth that nearly makes a growl build in her throat. 
Good- you smell so good- better than usual or maybe it’s just the dial of Tae’s senses that have been turned up because of Jungkook. 
Tae looks behind you, craning his neck and trying to figure out what exactly you’re looking at it, what piqued your interest in the way that has you smelling as sweet as an omega in heat. but it’s just Jin- sitting in their little half closet at the little desk vanity dotting his face with sunscreen, the only things in that little half closet are shoes and-  
The three boxes of sex toys stacked in the back, unmistakable. A little askew it’s hard to tell the last time they might have been used as they certainly weren’t used by tae. Jin is silhouetted in front of them, dabbing a moisturizer while a fluffy headband complete with puppy ears holds back his already blow-dried bangs.
If you had a sensitive nose, you might even be able to scent the undercurrent of arousal that coats the outside like Tae can. They’re airtight boxes so no lingering smell of arousal on the toys themselves can escape, But the others still touch the boxes when they’re aroused and thats enough to leave traces. 
The heat rising to your cheeks is unmistakable as is your sweetening scent, complimenting the scents in the room. The kind of smell that literally takes alphas by the balls when it comes from an omega because their every instinct is primed to be aware of it- to notice it.  
Before you can dart away as Tae’s sure you want to, Namjoon tries to fit between the two of you. He smells a lot better now that he’s had the chance to shower off the smell of his misery. His hair is sticking up everywhere in damp spikes. 
“Sorry” you back up against Tae to make room for him to slip past. Tae tries to press himself up as close to the wall to avoid you having to touch him but you lean, your warm body and your scent pressing up against his front. Tae almost wants to whine- a sound that definitely would read more ‘hormonal pup’ than 'in control alpha.’
But before any incidental rubbing can take place Tae watches your pack alpha pause and sniff the air. Pack alphas naturally have more sensitive senses, can smell things at a deeper level. Namjoon senses are primed to be aware of his pack-mates weather they’re in distress, anger, or happiness- even the kind you would rather he not notice. 
A month ago- Namjoon might not have been able to scent you this way but now- his pupils dilate honing in. “You both smell different are you- “ 
Luckily Namjoon is as thick as a stack of medical textbooks when it comes to things like this. Tae slings his arms around your waist, steering you away from Joon who thankfully has an injured pup to attend to. “Come to the kitchen with me! if I can’t choose your cup then you’ve got to choose mine!” Tae interjects, quickly steering you away, hand flexing as your hip moves underneath it, all but picking you up and carrying you away.
As you leave Tae swears, he can feel the tangible silence in the room and a quiet “you idiot” spoken from Jungkook.
You and Tae stand apart in the hallway, her hands leaving your waist like she’s suddenly realized she’s touching you without any real need too, and suddenly bothered by the idea that she might need to have a reason. “Sorry,” he says, though part of him isn’t sure what he’s apologizing for- manhandling you maybe (or while women handling)
Your pj’s are just as endearing now as they were last night, maybe more now that Tae notices the way they hang off of you- miss buttoned. The legs are so long that they have the possibility of tripping you. Something in her that is learned from Namjoon or Jin itches to correct it. Tae dismisses the urge and while she fucks around with the refrigerator you pick her out a mug. Small and pink with little silver flowers doodled along the sides and on the rim. 
Tae is going to be late for work and Jin doesn’t have the time to mess around with her hair today. Maybe last night gave Tae a little bit of a buffer because it feels like her clothes aren't on her somehow, some bit of that dysphoria that she's able to ignore due to the sheer weight of everything else today. Sometimes- there is simply too much going on for Tae to feel dysphoric.
It’s tough to say why but somehow Tae ends up leaving the house before she can talk to you; before he can say anything at all about the makeup last night or anything that might be better than “hey you look cute in your pj’s” and more along the lines of “hey- want to do anything tonight?”
But every time Tae closes her eyes, he sees a different face staring back at her- her own, the way she looked from last night for a split second.
The day is flush with stacking books and cute little hellos from the different patrons of Tae’s library. The little kids’ intent on raiding the picture book section are her favorite. Sometimes they forget their manners but Tae doesn’t mind when the loud squeals punctuate the usual quiet. A few older people who want to use the public library’s shitty WIFI file in as usual and a few college kids as well, tugging along double coffees and thick textbooks. Tae doesn't envy them.
Most of his day is quiet, filled with the hum and whisper of stories and his own bleeding concern for their youngest that colors the edge of every new task a little darker, a little more urgent. Because the sooner the workday ends the sooner she can get back home to Jungkook.
Jimin and Yoongi keep the group chats updated with the youngest’s condition and cute photos of kookie (all photos of kookie are cute photos). one photo in particular of Jungkook snuggled down and sipping at some decaffeinated tea in between you and Jimin makes Tae kick her feet underneath the front desk and swallow back her happy squeal. Tae makes it her lock screen after a moment of deliberation. Each update is greeted by its usual flurry of messages from the others, sweet encouragements, and lengthy texts from Jin and Hobi.
Halfway through the day, a new number gets added- and he knows it’s yours by the string of heart emojis that you send through, not your name or anything else.
Tae can’t help but check her phone every few minutes for updates about Jungkook (more texts from you too- though she pretends she’s not looking for those). He’s sure the other two alphas and Jin must be going likewise crazy. 
It’s always hard to leave when it's so clear that one of their packmates needs their help. Let alone Jungkook who would love to pretend like he’s invincible and powerful and capable all of the time- and let the reality of the situation slip away in favor of the fantasy that he’s as healthy as any of them.
They wouldn’t dare burst his bubble; his spirit is more important at times. Mental health cannot be sacrificed for the sake of the physical.
There are countless other things to occupy Tae's mind besides the dysphoria today so maybe she should be thankful.  During her lunch break, she eyes the medical texts in the backroom (the ones that the medical students usually grab around exam season are kept out of reach by virtue of them being expensive). 
At lunchtime, she lingers over the edition on mating marks before she thinks better of it and goes back to re-reading her favorite series. But she finds it hard to concentrate. The passages that usually have her swooning drifting by like advertisements; nothing to linger over and certainly not worth remembering.
She has so many questions- ones that you might not want to answer. How many more secrets will Tae have to proffer up before she understands the truth of you and Yoongi? How can you be so cavalier and normal about the whole mating thing?
Though maybe Tae's preconceived notions about what it means to be mated are getting in the way here. it’s product of how mating is displayed in the media; how many countless love stories has she read where the happy ending went one on one with a bite? How many times had she fantasized and fingered the spot on her neck late at night thinking about Jimin’s mouth? How his crooked front teeth might look immortalized forever on her skin?
They’ve talked about it briefly on and off over the years, after having loved each other for nearly a decade it was bound to come up more than a few times. But it’s Something that Tae hasn't legitimately thought about since before Yoongi left.
It’s not that alphas can’t wear each other’s marks, it's just that after Jimin and Taehyung became Jimin and Taehyung and Jungkook the idea of any pairing off and excluding whoever might remain became unconscionable.
And soon after that, they'd found each other a part of a pack and it became less about the two of them and more about how their love could be carefully nurtured within the careful confines of Namjoon and Jin's arms. But if you and Yoongi are paired off that means that there are an even number of mouths to go around and perhaps an even number of bites- that leave Jin and Namjoon, Hoseok and Jungkook, and Tae and Jimin.
After a while Tae lies her head down on the books In front of her, closing her eyes and willing away the possibilities dancing in her mind. Because it’s no use wondering at maybes and what if’s for right now.
This is usually how the seizure day’s go; Jungkook always spends the first few hours getting quiet and tiny before a burst of energy seems to settle under his skin, demanding to be released. Too much energy in his little body to work off and no work to do. So eventually, the news comes through that Jungkook has progressed past the half nauseous feeling and is now feeling itchy.
Canceling his classes doesn't mean he can't work it off, especially supervised. Tae breathes a sigh of relief when the group chats updates with a photo of Jimin and Jungkook in their gym clothes walking into Jungkook's gym right before he leaves at 3:30. With the playful caption of “don’t worry! I’m pup sitting,” from his soulmate, which is greeted with a few tired-looking faced emojis from Jungkook and a few gushes from the rest.
Hobi sunshine baby (3:34): come home so we can actually sit on you.
Jin baby (3:35): gross
Unknown number (3:35): gross
Tae stifles a giggle behind her hand, then saves your contact in her phone as “flower baby”. 
By the time she leaves and gets home the high sun makes her suit stuffy and uncomfortable. Itchy in a way that the dysphoria sometimes does too although Tae is 90% sure it's just the fact that she decided to wear her wool suit coat and not her cotton one today. Tae’s skin feels like a live wire, she finds her pace quickening when the roofline comes into view.
She hasn’t had much time to think about last night, maybe she’s pushed it away in her head a little out of necessity. Maybe the wound of dysphoria doesn't bleed unless you pick at it and Tae hadn’t had much of a reason to today.
Tae can hear the purrs from outside the door, before he even sets foot in your home.
Yoongi’s blond head bobs at the sound of the door opening and closing. “Hey” he says, so quiet he might as well be whispering. Though it sounds less like the word and more like I love you, it always sounds that way when it comes from Yoongi’s mouth. Your purring redoubles, louder when you smell Tae, though you don't look up to say hi.
the scent of baked goods lingers in the house, not just from your scent gland either. A tray of perfect looking tarts gleam with red insides on the centre island- strawberry or raspberry filling gleaming at the centre. And ah- you must have stress baked today. 
Tae puts his bag down, finds a place for his keys, and shucks off his uncomfortable jacket. Only then does she approach the couch, slowly, careful not to startle you.
You and Yoongi are the only one’s home. Pillowed on the couch in a pool of honey-yellow light. You’re pressed all along his side as close as two people can be without literally being one. A blanket that was probably covering you at one point piled around the two of you in the barest suggestion of a nest.
Tae has been learning, he spots the way your nose is rolling into your mate's tummy, rumbly omega purrs that erupt from you un contained and unrestrained in the presence of just Yoongi, just your mate.
Ah- your eyes are dilated, he should have known just from the strength of your purrs and not just the fact that you hadn't said anything when he walked in, you're in omegaspace. Though it's not unheard of for an omega to fall into it outside of their nest- It’s a little strange that you didn't snap out of it when he walked in the door. You must trust Tae an offal lot if you're willing to let down your walls like this right now.
Her eyes linger on you and how you're playing with the hem of Yoongi's shirt, hands needing it in the way that a cat would knead a pillow. Until Yoongi clears his throat “we’re home alone, now, if you want to ask.”
A high-pitched wine builds in your throat which is quickly remedied by a little attention to your scent gland from Yoongi’s hands. Your brain is a rush with ‘good good good,’ and ‘mate mate mate’ their words sound like you’re hearing them from underwater.
All you can smell in the air in Yoongi- marshmallow chocolaty goodness, and a thick intoxicating perfume that has you licking and lapping at your mates skin. He tastes like them a little, but only a tiny bit- like he laid in the place that that scent did last night. 
You whine hoping it will draw the alpha closer so you can smell it directly from the source. you are spiraling down, your brain reduced to one syllable words and the shear sensitivity of your body. You feel everything- every bit of Yoongi’s skin pressed to yours.
You feel when the couch depresses under the alpha’s knees, does she always smell this good? Or is it just today?
Tae can’t help but notice the way your hand curls over Yoongi’s hip. Now that She knows the mark is there, she can’t ignore it. the blanket is a careful barrier between you and Yoongi and Tae. The tv is a pleasant afterthought, but Yoongi turns it down.
You smile up at Tae, your Purrs increasing in volume but then you press your face back into Yoongi’s hip, hiding from the light. Something about Tae's face that makes the cotton bounds of your mind go all gooey pink- like melting cotton candy.
And ah- Tae hasn't seen you this deep in omega space before, you quite literally hide yourself under Yoongi’s shirt when Tae peers over to get a better look at you. Tae gets the feeling that while you’re physically present, you might be a little too far down to really partake in the conversation. So deep down that everything feels fluffy and soft and silken. But neither of them wouldn’t dare try to draw you out of it.
She can’t help it, it’s biology that makes her heart squeeze like this- the cute aggression that says to bite and nip and claim. Her muscles twitching from resisting the urge to heave you up and get you seated in Tae’s lap instead of your mates. Tae takes several steadying breaths through her mouth so that your scent won’t make her do exactly that.
Tae tugs on a lock of your hair in hello, Just a little bit. You lean your head back to smile up at her. Pulling yourself more firmly into Yoongi's lap to get just a little closer to Tae. Yoongi's hand slides under your shirt and your hip drumming his fingers against your taught stomach. You twitch, hips splaying, like a puppy would when getting their tummy rubbed. 
She’s seen the touches of omega space around your consciousness but never a haze this thick.
it’s that that makes Tae realize that whatever the story here- it won't really hurt. if you’re this comfortable at the prospect of sharing it- then there isn’t any reason to be afraid of your bond, to be afraid of being rude or overstepping boundaries. 
You and Yoongi- it’s an undeniable fact now. You will be together until the day he dies and It doesn’t scare him like it might have before. There's no use arguing over facts after all. It’s not like Tae could change the course of history even if she wanted to.
An omega in omega space is a delicate thing, even more, delicate with your mate crouched a little protectively over you. So Tae keeps her voice low when she speaks. “Tell me why- tell me why you’ve got her mark.”
Yoongi tips his head back against the couch, lets it rest there, and hums. Tae knows he’s wondering where he should start. He lets Yoongi muse at it for a while and when his eyes are open there is a darkness there. An uneasiness that says he’s picking and choosing how much to reveal right now.
Tae wishes he wouldn’t, wishes that Yoongi would just spit out whatever’s bothering him. would let it go so that it didn’t weigh on him anymore. let me take the weight, tae wants to beg, let me hold onto whatever weights you so you can be lighter than air my love. 
Yoongi has always been good at speaking Tae's language, since the beginning when their courtship was all about bargained for stories and shared enthusiasms. They might not be as blatantly affectionate or romantic as the others are but Tae and Yoongi have always loved each other in their own special way.
“You know how in some of your stories there are bad guys that are unequivocally bad, no sort of redemption possible?” 
Of course, she knows stories like that although she never liked them, Tae was always more a fan of the villains that never ended up being villains at all. The morally grey ones that you slowly grew to love as the story grew longer. (Yoongi isn't asking but if he did Tae would have said that villains like that help nurture self-sympathy in the reader, because there is nothing more compelling than a villian that resembles you.)
“The mark is redemption that I never deserved; I’m still trying to deserve it- even now.” Tae almost chokes. And while usually, the overly flowery words would work on him- now this doesn't.
“That’s not- tell me specifics Yoongi. please- I want to understand” Yoongi sighs, looking down at you. You're purring and slowly rubbing your face into his belly again. Lost to the world and ignoring their conversation.
Yoongi reaches down and turns your head, you blink owlishly a strangled whine breaking but Yoongi’s fingers at your lips soothes you. The mark looks violent the more Tae looks at it. Being bitten like that- by two people- Tae can't imagine what that feels like.
“He never completed the bond with her, even though he bit her, she never bit him back. It was only- minutes after that I bit her to save her, to make sure the other mark didn’t eat away at her.”
Tae watches the way that Yoongi’s hands shake. His voice breaks like he still can't forget the betrayal. Sometimes Tae wonders if Yoongi Mourns that in the quiet of his own head. From the sound of it, Yoongi’s brother was a monster; but Tae hopes Yoongi knows that he's not an orphan just because he's dead- he has them, forever and always. no matter what happens and no matter this.
“She would have gone crazy, and I couldn’t let it happen, I couldn’t. not after she sacrificed herself to let me come home. I couldn’t just leave her there.” Yoongi isn’t crying, but he is curled around you.
There is more to this story here, but Tae remembers what Yoongi had said the other night, the story he told the others then. Your ex-husband, half-mates death is a little too suspiciously timed for Tae’s liking but neither of you look like killers. So Tae lets the though slide away, because no- none of the people that She loves are killers, that she’s sure of. Somehow she feels like she’d know if they where. 
He can’t imagine why Yoongi didn’t tell them the whole truth then as It would have been so much easier if he had. But there is only one reason why he might not have, a reason that Tae is slowly becoming painfully aware of with every moment that Yoongi’s scent fades from chocolate gooeyness to rainstorm fluff.
The reason why he suddenly holds onto you so hard yet gently. Like the memory of almost losing you is too much for his body to handle. The fear and anguish taking hold in his little body like it’s that day again, He is ridged one moment, crouched over you like his body can shield you from the truth.  
Yoongi feels guilty about what happened and from the looks of it- it’s eating him up inside, consuming his better judgment with a frightening vigor. You grow frantic in your scenting, like there isn’t enough of your scent to go around. A high-pitched whine building as you nuzzle into his wrist, curling your knees around him. Your eyes closed but Tae has a feeling you'd be able to find Yoongi blind.
Tae doesn’t know what makes him reach forward and thread his fingers into your hair but you relax again at the harsh contact, his own gentle cinnamon spiking as if to greet your own. “It’s okay honey, Yoongi’s not upset at you.”
Yoongi sits back and watches the two of you interact. Tae has never taken any sort of a dominant role in their pack, content to fluctuate. She’s dead in the middle of the pack hierarchy because there has always been someone more submissive or more dominant than her. Mot quite at the bottom but modal- like Yoongi himself but-
Fuck, her gums ache with the urge to nip and bite the right side of your neck an unmarked call. The urge to ease you back into that soft headspace, not the blinking awake distress, pretty kissable lips moving around words that finally take root once you’ve figured out how to speak again.
“Should be” Your words are still all slurred soft, like they spent too much time bouncing around the inside of your head until they fluttered out. you fail to blink away the haze settling for ducking your head low at Tae's eye contact. Something about her eyes makes you shy and flustered in a way you aren't around your mate. ‘alpha’ your instincts sing, ‘my alpha’
If you were Jungkook, he would lean forward to nip at your scent glad, anything to settle you. But as of right now- Tae can only look and want. Hushing you with a low hum, pressing your head closer to Yoongi’s wrist. Your whole body goes a little limp when he finally manages to mediate his scent back to its usual soft chocolate. Tae makes an approving noise in her throat. “There you go pup.”
Tae sighs- she’s never been a fan of arguing, but something ticks in her jaw. “You need to talk to Namjoon- you need to tell him- he could help- there has to be something that modern medicine could do.” her voice has the same level of desperation she feels whenever Jungkook talks about how it feels to have his seizures. 
The horrifying reality that for all this love that they share the rest of them are fairly powerless to help Jungkook even on a good day. They can’t just make Jungkook better with kisses and cuddles.
You and Yoongi can’t just fix your fucked up mating marks with good old love and rest, no matter how hard you might try. 
Yoongi shrugs and Tae can already tell that he’s not going for it, trying to dismiss Tae’s concerns as easy as that. He and Joon can be like that sometimes, as standoffish and plucky with each other as they are in love. Each one unwilling to admit how much they need the other.  (If you weighed the words that lay unsaid between them and the weight of their shared hearts, which side would come out on top?)
“We do fine on our own, the first few months were the worst but now-” Yoongi’s voice goes all quiet, “now I don’t have to just keep her alive.” Tae's whole body goes rigid. Yoongi hasn't told them much of what it was like in those months between your hell and when Jimin found Yoongi in h-mart. She doesn't know if she should be shocked or have expected that but either way, her alpha instincts are going haywire.
huh- Trans or not- woman or man- it appears that the instincts are still insatiable. In fact- they seem to be elevated today. Making Tae tug herself closer to you, get a hand on your shoulder  at Yoongi’s confession because- no- Tae’s alpha instincts won’t let you be so far apart for another minute, especially with your mate talking like that.  
You purr shallowly as Yoongi strokes down your mating mark, cupping the back of your neck it reverberates in Tae's fingers. You’re so far down in omega space that Tae’s sure you won’t be able to muse on their conversation until later. “I was so worried of you hating her for my mistake, I think that’s why I’m so scared of telling you all the truth”
you nuzzle into tae’s hands, nose following her thumb until you reach the scent gland at the inside of her wrist, sending an electric zing up her arm. 
"I'm not even going to dignify that with a response because it's that idiotic," Yoongi laughs, at that seems to jog you from your stupor, you pull yourself up a little more to be fully in his lap though you struggle. tugging at the front of Yoongi's shirt to get him closer. 
he shushes you again, manipulating your body to sit up against his, legs framing his hips. in any other setting it might be too private or too sexual but it's oddly- almost nurturing. the way that Yoongi cradles you against his front. You fumble with the front of his shirt like your hands are too fluffy or fuzzy to properly grasp it.
Alphas don't really enter into alpha space like omegas do- but Tae hopes it feels good. You deserve to feel good and safe and protected for a while. You seem to have scented something from Tae- a little bit of displeasure or something because you turn your face to look at her, pupils still dilated, cheek resting against Yoongi's shoulder. 
“Not mad? Not mad at us?” Tae’s sour scent is pungent in the closet space, but she shakes her head,
“I’m not angry at you sweetheart.”  Tae just aches thinking of the two of you, all alone in this house with your souls torn apart and trying to knit It back together with love. Two people who might never have been bound so close if it weren’t for the circumstances.
She clings to the two of you like a second skin. Your purrs deepen, no hint of the whines just thick and cuddly omega pheromones filling the room with unbelievable warmth. God, she can taste you on the back of her tongue when she breathes in deep. She hopes the deep lungfuls of air she breathes don't sound too greedy. It’s all she can do to keep her breathing even and steady and not gasping.
You send a dopey smile in Tae’s direction, Snuggling back into Yoongi’s neck. Yoongi doesn't look affected beyond his fond smile- Tae wishes she felt the same but it’s taking every ounce of herself control to hold herself back from scooping you out of your mates arms and placing you in her own lap. 
You tuck your knees up and Tae’s hand falls onto your skin, stroking gently down the back of your neck. You are soft to the touch- the faint baby hairs on the back of your neck like velvet-
You make everything else around you feel squishy and new too- even if it’s broken. tae’s lungs have never felt better, she honestly couldn’t feel dysphoric right now if she even tried. something about you is just a balm to it. you make it so much better- tae’s half convinced it could be magic. The jagged pieces of Yoongi's guilt and Tae's netted and barely-held together trust are all left irrelevant as you cuddle between them. 
You’re all a little broken sometimes and though Tae knows this and would never dismiss the pain but she can't help but think that This might be getting better- you might be getting better little bit by little bit. 
she's not foolish enough to think everything good will always stick- but for right now things don't feel so bad for once. The weight of emotional instability and everything that might be wrong is not threatening for tonight. Not here in your puddle of sunlight full of the scent of cake, chocolate, and cinnamon. Gooey and warm like fried hotteok. 
In a rare moment of bravery, Tae leans in close to peck a kiss along your forehead and she hopes you know it's a thank you for last night. if you can give Tae that softness, then she can give you that now. Especially since Yoongi's babying seems to be working on you so well.  
You squeak in surprise and indignation, cute pink lips parting. And Tae kisses your skin again just to hear that noise and make you more flustered. Yoongi smirks, and says nothing about the blush doubtlessly coating tae's cheeks. if she had longer hair she'd be able to hide behind it.
You make a whining noise and they get your meaning- used to registering sounds that are not words and attributing meaning to them. They press closer, firmer, Yoongi’s hands going hard over your shoulders to squeeze comfortingly. And it’s a beautiful thing when you lift your head- the fringe of his hair caught on your forehead just to look back at tae. 
“you really like Tae Tae huh sweetheart?” Yoongi teases. And honestly Tae isn’t expecting you to speak again but-
“Tae Tae the pretties and the cutest and she’s-“ your words are slurred, eyelashes fluttering but Yoongi hushes you, barely not catching the freezing of Tae’s hands. The cold fear curdling the enjoyment in her stomach. Luckily Yoongi only seems to have eye for his mate and not Tae.
“She’s so delirious, I promise, she literally just says everything on her mind when she’s like this.” Tae hums, but keeps rubbing at your shoulders after a moment to avoid suspicion. If you’re like this now- Tae wonders if you ever fall into omega space on one of your bad days- and what it looks like if you talk during then.
Eventually Tae and Yoongi lapse into a quiet silence, at peace with their thoughts, nothing much but the sound of a distant lawn mower and the hum of the train on the tracks a few blocks down and your purring, sweet and lulling. Tae’s cheeks feel warm.
Yoongi doesn’t look suspicious about the accidental pronoun slip up, but tae is too curious for her own good. “Don’t you want to know, don’t you wanna know why she made you tell me?” 
Yoongi shakes his head, “I don’t think I need to; I trust her.” Mates trust each other in a different way than non-mates do. Tae wonders what it's like- wonders how that feels to be wound so close to someone you forget where they end and you begin.
Tae sighs, “When are you going to tell the others?”
Yoongi shakes his head, “eventually? soon? when they find out on their own? take your pick.” You lean back at their words, even sat in Yoongi’s lap- you still look so tiny, at eye level with him, but only barely.
“Kiss?” you ask, hands fisted childlike in the front of Yoongi’s shirt, eyes on your lap like you honestly think your mate would deny you.
“Sure pup,” it’s sweet to see the way that the kiss rounds away Yoongi’s rough edges- casting away memories of that time and banishing the last of the saltiness from Yoongi’s scent.
Tae can’t stop the happy rush of pheromones as she smooths over your back either, grab Yoongi’s hand where it rests to lace them together- a careful lock to keep you safe and in their protective bundle.
Tae's instincts continue to go haywire, the other alphas should be here, need help to guard you, where are they? Tae’s chest puffs out a little- it’s okay, she can do a good enough job until they return, she’s got you. A part of her that is more alpha than the rest settles in satisfaction as tae blinks lazily up at Yoongi, whose looking at Tae like she just slapped him across his face. "What?" 
"Nothing" the beta swallows, "you just look really kissable right now," Yoongi shrugs, trying to minimize the way that his whole face is bright red, always needing to cut his sweetness with a little bit of assholery now and then.  "now you know the way to my heart is through her so- be an alpha about it."
Tae grins at the teasing "I wasn't doing it for you, if you Wanna kiss me you're gonna have to do it yourself beta," the word could never be derogatory but Yoongi has always been able to bring out all hidden sides of Tae- including the cocky ones.
You shift in Yoongi's lap, and if the friction is doing something to the beta or to you neither of you show it. Your pupils are blown when you put up at Tae and oh- she's a goner, isn't she? looking suddenly more awake at the process of kisses,
“Kiss?” it's not surprising that that's the word you've chosen to fixate on. but your words are softer and more unsure, like you’re ready for Tae to decline your offer. Tae's feral growl as she lunges forward makes you giggle, shrieking as she peppers kiss after kiss along the highest part of your cheek. 
Hand fluttering on her wrist as Tae's big hands cup your face. Maybe this is why she was made so big; so that she can properly hold you, your face fits perfectly between her large hands. Tae's body feels alive with a new purpose as you giggle and melt, a true puppy pile on top of both of them.
Until she tilts her face and gets her hand on the back of your neck, steadying you so you can't squirm away and blows hard against the skin of your shoulders. A loud ripple raspberry like the kind Tae used to give his little cousins before he left home. You bark out a giggle that is like nothing Tae’s ever heard- unrestrained and bubbling like little kids should be. You thrash under the ticklish feeling. Deliciously sweet prey unable to escape their hold.
You squirm happily, giggles and more giggles blooming across the room to fill the house with sounds of happiness for once. Yoongi smiles and laughs at your over-the-top reaction too- his fingers digging into your sensitive sides. 
They are merciless, and by the time they finally relent, you're sprawled across Tae's lap. Chest heaving, hair over your face messy and ruffled, but absolutely a happy puppy lump. “Meanies!” 
Tae is breathless with this feeling, fondness, but also something more. A kind of watchfulness that is as hungry as a beast would be in winter. In that moment- Tae is both a gentle protector and a monster. The kind that waits to protect and hunt the delicate form in front of her.  
God, is this how Jimin feels all the time? so at mercy to his instincts that they seem to shadow his thoughts and coat the back of his tongue like an aftertaste? It’s just you and Jungkook today that have Tae feeling this way, and being alone with just you and Yoongi- she’s sure of it.
The rest of the afternoon goes something like this the three of you heaped on the couch, your little scenting ritual that eventually grows to include Tae, nuzzling into her delicately peachy tummy. The kind of plushness that encourages a bite or a hickey.
Not that you're brave enough even in omega space to mark Tae like that. She doesn't seem to mind your prodding and possessive whines. She just smells so good, cinnamon and spice, strong and earthy in a way that just- shuts off part of your brain.  
Tae and Yoongi talk softly while you play with their hands, kissing each one with little exaggerated “mwah!” noises that make their hearts swell with love. Yoongi and Tae watch the light in the main room change, sitting side by side with you in the middle like a piano to be played by their fingertips. The joy of touching just to be touched, to redefine your body in the terms of their fingertips.
And by the time the three of you are out of the nearest square of yellow afternoon light, you’re blinking a little clearer, not quite completely there but more lucid than before. 
Before long the sound of the others pulling into the driveway from work disturbs your peace, and you lift your head from Tae's lap leaving her feeling strangely bereft- she hadn't even gotten you to sit in her arms properly- all this time and she hadn't been brave enough to pull you up and closer- and it feels like the possibility of that is drifting firmly away. Something in Tae's chest gives a painful squeeze. 
Namjoon and Jin are their usual bundle of carefully controlled affection and the impervious wall of their combined scents, talking with a familiar hush that instantly makes Tae relax. The crinkle of the shopping bags between them makes their words near unintelligible.  
“Hey guys, how was work?” while it might seem too usual or too routine for Yoongi to ask such basic questions- maybe the fact of the matter is that they all wish they could be around each other at every moment. That they never had to be parted. Yoongi always wants to know what they got up to when they were out of sight. Maybe it reminds him of other times- the whole moths of their lives that he wasn't privy to.
Your hair is a little cow-licked when you lift your head interrupting Namjoon’s next words, and Jin- Jin knows that dopy smile, that haze- is intimately aware of how good it feels-
“Jinnie!” you chirp, eyes still half-closed and oh, he’s never kicked off his shoes quicker. Your purring redoubles when he cups your cheeks, bringing them in to nuzzle close. Sniffing near your scent gland your chin. You smell so happy, like Yoongi and Tae too- there are few things more comforting or enthralling than the smell of a happy pup.
He turns to Tae wide-eyed “what did you do?” equal parts worried and happy. “she was just- like this when I came home so Yoongi and I snuggled her.” You are a lump, a happy lump and slowly trying to pull yourself over to Jin and over the edge of the couch, not that your limbs seem to be cooperating.
“no-no no” Namjoon has the good sense to lunge forward and stop you from do doubt falling over the edge. Tae’s hand fists on your hips, pulling you back and making sure you stay put. No climbing over things for you when you’re so dizzy happy.
“Pup” Jin cautions, moving around the couch to pulling you up with a gentle but firm pressure. Something in Tae settles, sending a look at Namjoon as he watches you move against jin, his own pheromones filling the room. Allowing Tae to relax but also starting a subtle itch down his back. like tae needs to keep Namjoon in his peripherals. 
"Thank god- I needed to pee," Yoongi says, darting away after a quick peck to your temple. "Yoonie" you pout, watching his retreating form with a sad expression, Tae has no doubt you're clingy enough to literally fallow your mate anywhere right now.
An omega whine is a call for all alphas near and far to descend upon them. A low pitch that lights a fire under their asses like none other. A whine and chirp that builds slowly, heart-wrenching and lonely, akin to a lone wolf's call. “shit- joon-” 
To your credit- your scent even sours a little, Namjoon and Tae literally couldn't keep themselves in place if they tried, not even Hoseok who’s just arrived home  red conversed feet suddenly thudding with a wooden clang against the deck, wrenching open the door as hard as he can. "what's wrong! What's happened?"
But nothing has- except you relaxing back against tae’s chest. shoved in between Namjoon and Tae. even jin has his hand on you, shoulders curving inward, pulse hammering. hoseok deflates, digging his palm into his eyes, “Jesus-” 
Only then, nose pressed to Namjoon's chest does a clarity seem to snap into place in your eyes. "Hello pup" he grins down at you, and you're out of his arms as quickly as you jumped into them. Turning and burying your face into Jin's chest as Tae and Namjoon try not to smother you. 
“Someone sedate me” you groan, Much to their amusement.
Spending time with them has gotten easier and easier, and it gets even better when everyone gets home. Everyone tries their best not to smother Jungkook whose looking good as new smelling like sweat and honey goodness. 
“God- it smells so good in here” he groans when he kicks off his shoes, Jimin close behind with empty water bottles and a foam roller. And Jungkook and Jimin join the Frey and panic of putting together dinner and doing the other tasks.
Namjoon does a near-perfect job of reigning in his more controlling instincts. It's a near-perfect job, but before dinner part of his jaw ticks when he sees Hoseok playfully gripping Jungkook around the waist, Jimin too- Those two have long worked out their antsieness and their lingering worry over Jk's condition, but Namjoon hasn't. Still feels the urge to protect and care for him probably aggravated by your state. 
you're still offaly starry-eyed, following Jin around the kitchen, bouncing from packmate to packmate hugging and touching and making puppy eyes at anyone who might listen. it will be a little while before you fully come back to yourself, but the alphas watch you with a quiet reverence. 
“Did you really have to go out today?” his words are more akin to a whine. Namjoon might be the only one Jungkook allows to show concern after days like this.
“I swear I'm fine guys, could I do this if I wasn’t?” you let out a little cry as Jungkook suddenly reaches down, gripping you under your thighs and effortlessly placing you on the countertops. Looking back at them with a silly little smirk, like lifting you will show them. it does have the added benefit of making you flustered “that doesn't count- y/n’s so tiny.”
Jungkook handles that reply by heaving Jimin up there too, turning to face Joon with a shit eating grin. 
And suddenly you’re knocking knees with him, They’re all feeling a little playful this morning, the stress of yesterday burned off. Jimin is feeling playful today, puppies and a boyish grace that they all seem to have at certain times overtaking him, Jimin wiggles his eyebrows, aiming for seductive and barely falling short.  
He looks better this morning. Not quite as unsteady or dizzy. None of the pack mates check on him with worried glances. They know that Jungkook doesn't like to feel smothered or too delicate during the days after his seizures.
“Your ass is on my countertop.”
“Our countertop” you correct, you’re squirming a little against the feeling of Jin’s hands. Holding onto your waist, though he can’t really tell if you’re squirming closer or farther.  
Seokjin leans against the countertop heavy-lidded eyes dancing with the challenge. You’re not going to get him to call you good pup by acting that way, but then again- maybe you don’t want to be called good today.  
Yoongi sets the heaviest pot on the range and Seokjin’s hands finds its way to his waist “did she eat anything today?”
“m’right here.”
Seokjin’s eyes are teasing, yet serious. “I didn’t ask you pup,” and oh- you’re melting under his stern gaze, can barely process it as Yoongi says no- no you haven’t. you don’t know why but you kind of like it when they talk about you like that- not like you’re not there but like- like you’re something to be taken care of. you shiver, and you can tell by the brief look Yoongi gives you over jin’s shoulder that he’s going to make you unpack that later, that a lot of whats being done right now won’t go untalked about. Your mate is a watchful- ever present protector. 
And then Jin is ordering someone to bring you those jam tarts you made and strawberry sweetness is bursting along your tongue, prodded forward by Jin’s fingers. Being fed by him makes you spiral down; you’re sinking and sinking quick. lapping at his fingertips when the tart is all eaten up. 
His words a compliment to the general clamor, Hoseok’s and Jungkook horsing around, Namjoon cutting himself one in half and feeding the other slice to Tae talking about desert before dinner. “There you go pup; I know omega space takes a lot out of a person- trust me.” Jin knows from experience. He sucks air through his teeth, “Especially with someone new.”
Tae is curled close to Namjoon, not quite touching him but still. They talk- probably about some story that a patient told today or other tales of woe. But you shake your head, because no- it wasn’t like that- Tae was probably your favorite part of today.
But you pout, hard and in a way that makes Jin want to smother you with kisses.
“What’s wrong pup” you whine, looking at him and hoping that for once you don’t have to say what you want- that Jin will just know You didn’t get enough kisses today- it feels stupid to admit it, but Yoongi had kissed you maybe half a dozen times and Jinnie only twice and Taetae’s face kisses felt nice too but- you feel a little pouty.
Jin sighs and strong arms his way between your thighs. “It’s okay pup- I’ve got you.” Of course, Jin knows, Jin always knows what his pups want. Kissing jin has become one of your favorite pastimes, but next to you on the counter top, Jimin makes a noise, half needy and half in approval. 
Jin makes a snickering noise before Jimin growls, pulling the older omega down onto him. Jimin might be the alpha of the two of them but he’s still smaller and seated next to you. Two of Jin’s pup’s where he can see them and touch them and kiss them to his hearts content (now if only he could wrangle the other 5). 
Jimin hums, his hand on your thigh, just your lower just above your knee. And when you pull back his eyes are heavy lidded, he smells good, the warmth from his burning muscles making his scent warmer, reading more vanilla latte than just plain vanilla. maybe it was Jimin and Jungkook this morning that set you up for Omegaspace in the first place. it feels full circle now. 
it’s intimate, but its also not- the whole back is here and Jimin is looking at you like that- like he’s half thankful you where here today and half Focused in. “you smell like tae and Yoongi” he purrs. 
But he lingers, his hand sliding up to fiddle with yours. you have almost the same size hands though Jimin’s are a little rougher than yours. Rougher- but just as warm. “Can I-” Jimin’s chest heaves uneasy his very breath shaky. 
He’s not shy often, but with you he knows he has to be careful- Jin kisses you all the time for christ sake, and after him just kissing Jin and Jin kissing you, its like you’ve kissed indirectly already- so why does it feel like he’s asking for something big. 
“Can I do that too?” you squirm, but Jin is right there, and so is the rest of the pack, they’ll keep you safe- and it’s Minnie, Minnie who always treats you with so much gentleness, always acts like your safety is his chief concern. Maybe you struggle to feel safe, but it always feels better with Jimin there. 
And maybe you aren’t totally unafraid of this- but you knew what can of worms you opened when you and Jin started being open with your affection. Maybe you can blame this on your lingering omegaspace.  
for some reason, you look behind jimin at tae, she’s deep in conversation with namjoon, the pack alpha cradling his arm. jimin draws your attention back to him with a hand on your chin, “you’ve got a little- here”
There is a little bit of jam on your lip, and instead of telling you about it, Jimin leans in and licks it off, light and with a little flick of wet. your eyes fluttered closed and you become keenly aware of how he’s leaning over you, hand on one side of your hip, your head up against the cabinet. Plush lips pressing into yours a mouth that licks in and teeth that nip, scraping the sweetness from your skin. It’s good- it feels natural and normal.
somehow your hand ends up on Jimin’s heart, not pushing him away just feeling it as it flutters, happily like a bird, pulling away but not quite. he has freckles, you can’t remember if you never noticed before. “good?” he asks, a smirk playing on the edge of his lips, you don’t know what you look like, or what you smell like- if you’re wanting this too much- if its a turn off or if it’s anything. your brain is a happy soup of omegan impulses and skattered thoughts. 
You’ve never kissed someone thats made you feel so hazy. you couldn’t string a full Sentance together right now if you tried. 
 Your whine is high pitched and surprised, a breathless “alpha,” spoken more against Jimin’s lips than not, as he slots his lips against yours again and-
Taehyung's growl is not the quiet kind, it’s so loud it might as well be a snarl, more animal than human. 
it’s not the kind that speaks of a hidden threat or a coy playfulness like the earlier playful grumbles. this growl has an edge that could cut glass- the kind of sound you should never make directed at a pack mate, reserved only for enimies. 
This is not only primal- this is possessive. Possessive in a way that only your mate should be with you. But all Tae’s knows is that it seemed too loud- too loud to be coming from anywhere but her chest. She’s shocked to press her hand there and find her whole body shaking.
Namjoon's hand falls on the back of Taehyung's neck, not quite a scruff but not-not one, the growl gets cut off abruptly. The room spins, a feeling like she's half dizzy and half high. and the red angry haze of the moment snaps back and everyone freezes, Yoongi with the pot, jin standing with the knife, Jungkook and hobi rough housing, and you and minnie, pulling back, looking devastated. 
Tae- tae growled at Minnie of all people. 
You, Seokjin, and Jungkook are a mess of omega pheromones, sweetening with every second. Sour to sweet to sour again in a dizzying cycle. Afraid eyes directed at Tae. Does no one realize how sweet it is? How maddening? It feels like Tae is losing her mind, she can't smell anything beyond your sweetness at the back of his throat- the part of his brain that usually processes the olfactory information cut off from the rest of himself.
He's gasping, trying to smell the others- smell Jimin too- but all he can smell is the omegas. black spots dance in his vision and Namjoon quite literally has to hold him up- embarrassment wars with fear and a feeling of Thankfulness because thank God for pack alphas, Teahyung would be sprawled out on her ass or lunging at Jimin. If it weren't for Namjoon's arms around him- holding him up as much as he's holding him back.  
The worst part is Jimin looking at him, a little heartbroken. Because-
Because the sound was directed at him- not directed at you. Alpha- you’d called for your alpha and Tae had answered it. Taehyung has never growled at Jimin like that- not when they were pups or at the beginning of their relationship when they were still trying to figure out who the dominant one was between them.
Tae feels like he’s going to start crying at how upset Jimin looks to hear a sound of such outright aggression and hatred from one of his pack mates. And Tae scrambles to recorrect it, bearing his neck in Jimin’s direction- a clear apology. 
"Sorry I don't know what came over me- what happened- I-" Tae is lost for words, Namjoon’s hands feel like fire as one circles Tae’s neck and the other stays locked around her middle. “I’m sorry” she actually is crying, big fat tears that drip down her chin.
Namjoon's hand slides down Taehyung's neck to her steadily enflamed scent gland, a little tender to the touch. Even though Namjoon is another alpha- the contact makes her keen. Which isn't normal at all. Makes you and Seokjin and the rest of the pack look at Tae with increasing concern.
Jimin darts over at that- distressed at hearing that kind of noise from Tae- Tae who never vocalizes like the rest of the first the growl and now this.  Tae feels like she's been punched in the gut when Jimin presses his nose to his soulmate's scent gland taking a deep breath, staggering back because thank god- thank god he’s not mad. 
she honestly doesn’t know what that was- one second Jimin was a threat- and the next he was the only person in the room Tae wanted close. He feels all up and down, his emotions cut up in little bit sized pieces that are too small to tell where they came from.  
Something is wrong- something is really wrong. Tae can tell that Jimin is rolling the scent around in his head, his lungs, his tongue after he leans in to take a sniff at his inflamed scent gland. It could be you in Omega space, it could have been Jungkook this morning- hell it could be just the change in season but it’s not. Jimin’s eyes are unreadable, swimming with- is that humor? When he pulls back.
"What's wrong Minnie? What's going on?"
"Tae" Jimin's voice is a full-on croon, a little chiding as he leans in again to lick up Tae's scent gland, drinking him down fully. Tae’s scent glad is so sensitive that he lets out a pitched up ‘ah’ at the contact. Bearing his neck for Jimin again.
That solidifies it- Tae smells so good, tastes thick and heady. Cinnamon apple pie and pumpkin spice, comfort, and heat on the back of your tongue, like a choked off moan.
"Oh Tae- you're in pre-rut sweetheart."
~-~
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