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#sorry i never draw/post over here idek
bumofthewild · 1 year
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drew my fwend nana @motekill
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verdart · 1 year
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hi i just wanna clear up that i never copied your art idk how i can prove it but i swear i just used the reference pic from pinterest i reblogged with,, i assume its the same one you used hence the same poses and the placement of james and sirius is just coincidence!! im really new to the marauders fandom and havent seen much art or had chance to follow artists in the fandom or anything yet i just wanted to have a go at drawing them and ik how annoying it is to have ppl copy your art and i wouldnt wish it upon anyone i swear i didnt copy your art
Honestly i made it like in 2021 may so idek what ref i used lol. No worries bro your art is so cool btw like your style and all. Im sorry it got a bit rude I've just been seeing my art coppied and traced and posted with no credit (especially that dtiy cuz it has no watermark ;-;) all over the place so i got on the edge real fast. Sorry for all that ;-;
Edit: also welcome to the fandom been here since 2017 (first as a consumer then creator om ig mostly) and its always fun to see new artists and writers bringing in their stuff.
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scvrllet · 4 years
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the inevitable / r.b
Pairing: Regulus Black x Fem!Reader
Summary: Defying the Dark Lord never ends well, you and Regulus learned this from experience
Warning(s): death, brief mention of torture, angst but with a fluffy ending (you’re welcome, we all know I usually would’ve left it angsty)
Words: 3k+
Prompt: “Run away with me, it’ll be worth it.” will be in bold
This is for @obsessedwithrandomthings‘ writing challenge (congrats again on 500 followers!) 
A/N: I cannot write fluff I’m so sorry if you cringe. Also I’m posting this at nearly 11pm so idek if anyones gonna see this
General HP Taglist: @summer-writes @lunaralpha270 @tinylumpiaa @slytherin-chaser @bloodblossom73 @peachesandpinks @mischiefsemimanaged @accio-rogers @iamak20 @klaus-m-trash
Permanent Taglist: @sleep-i-ness @emmaloo21 @62442-am @flowersgrewbackasth0rns @imintoodeeptostop
Regulus stood hunched over the basin. The green glow of the remaining potion acting as a cruel reminder of what remaining torture he has to go through. Kreacher stood in front of him with a goblet in his hands. Regulus nodded and gulped down the potion, feeling the burning sensation as it went down.
He’s only had a few sips and so far, have only felt like his insides were on fire. As uncomfortable and painful it was, he forced himself to take more until his surroundings seemed to change.
(Y/N)?” He rasped as his vision started to focus on the figure sprawled out in front of him. When his vision finally focused, that was when he started screaming and scrambled to get up. Kreacher quickly dropped the goblet back into the basin and went to hold back his master who was mumbling stuff under his breath.
“Master Black, you must drink the potion.”
“(Y/N)! She’s there! Kreacher let go of me, she’s going to die!”
“Master Black, (Y/N) isn’t there. You must drink the potion.”
By this point Kreacher had to force the boy to take the potion and he hated every single second of it. Hearing his Master’s cries and protests to save someone who wasn’t there. Kreacher only hoped that they’d be out of here soon.
Taking more of the potion only made the visions worse. He kept seeing you, then Sirius, then the both of you laying in front of him. The two of you, dead before him just before the vision changed again. This time, Regulus recognized it as a memory. It was the first time he had gotten into a fight with you. 
“I just don’t see why you’re so worked up on this (Y/N). I’ll be fine, just because my family supports him doesn’t mean I’ll become a Death Eater.” Regulus said, his tone laced with annoyance as he lied straight to your face. 
“Than run away with me, it’ll be worth it. I promise. You won’t have to worry about Voldemort or your family. It’ll only be us. Just say the word, take my hand and we’ll go.” You pleaded desperately 
It hurt him to see you so stressed over him and it hurt even more that he was lying to you. He was already branded with the Dark Mark but he just didn’t know how to tell you. He didn’t even know if he wanted to tell you. 
“No, (Y/N), I can’t. He’ll find us, find me somehow. That will only put us into more danger.” Again, lies spilled out from his mouth. 
Regulus now wondered if he had taken your hand, would have things turned out differently.
When the potion was finally gone, Kreacher quickly grabbed the locket and switched it for the one Regulus had brought that contained the letter.
“Water. I need water.” Regulus mumbled, looking around the cave before crawling towards the dark lake surrounding the island they were standing on.
“Master Black no!” Kreacher protested but it was too late.
Immediately after Regulus and cupped his hands into the water to bring some to his lips, white ghastly hands had started to crawl out from the water. Several of them from all sides of the island. It was as if they were waiting for him.
By the time Kreacher made it to Regulus’ side, the inferi were already dragging him towards the water and they both knew that there was nothing that could be done. Before he was pulled under the water, he gave Kreacher one last order, fighting to stay above the water for even just a few more seconds.
“Go! Don’t tell my family anything, and give the letter to (Y/N). Protect her at all cost and destroy the locket”
The House elf nodded and with a guilty expression, appeared out of the cave and back to 12 Grimmauld Place. The sounds of his Master’s screams and cries echoing in his head as he appeared into the home that felt colder than usual. He quickly called for his master’s owl and gave it the letter. “To Hogwarts, to Miss (Y/N) (Y/L/N).” 
---
Mail at Hogwarts was usually delivered during breakfast unless it was considered urgent, then it’d be delivered straight to the recipient’s dorm.
You were sitting on the edge of your one of your dorm-mates bed when a pecking noise was heard from outside the window. It was one of your other dorm-mates who decided to open the window after you waved it off as a tree branch on the window. 
“It’s not a branch (Y/N),why would there be a branch here? Anyways, it’s a letter for you.” They said as they handed you the letter. 
The second you grabbed it from her hand your brows raised as you recognized the Black family crest stamped in the middle of it, sealing the envelope shut. “Regulus?” you mumbled as you got up to go sit on your own bed. 
For the past month you noticed that he was acting differently and just a week ago he apparently left school. You just assumed that his parents needed him home for some urgent business and that was why he didn’t tell you anything. He was a busy boy after all. 
Breaking the seal on the envelope you took out the piece of parchment which was written in black ink. Your heart swells as you read what was written in it.
My little dove, 
If you’re reading this then it means that I have been killed. I’m sorry I’ve kept you in the dark about this but I found out something about Voldemort. He’s created this thing called a Horcrux. He’s not human, not anymore. For the past month I’ve been trying to figure out where to find it and possibly destroy it. I know that you’d probably scold me for doing a suicide mission but that’s now why I haven’t told you anything. It’s because I know you’d join me and do anything and everything so that I could live but I can’t let that happen. I’m ashamed to be a part of this family and shamed to have waited so long before finally realizing how horrible it actually is. 
There isn’t much time. I’m writing this the night before I go to the cave with Kreacher. Hopefully he is able to destroy the Horcrux and he’ll be mortal once again. 
Also, another thing. Please don’t tell my family anything or anyone in general, especially Sirius. If they ask about me just say you don’t know. Sirius would go out of his way to try and kill him and as much as I miss him, he’s safer with the Potters. Or at least I hope. 
I love you (Y/N), I always have and always will. Not even death can stop me, I promise. 
Yours forever,  Regulus Arcturus Black.
P.S.
Please don’t rush to see me again. We will meet again when your time comes but for now, your time is far from near. Don’t rush it darling, it’s not a race to the end. I love you forever. 
You didn’t notice the tears that fell from your eyes until one landed on the letter you were now gripping tightly. Your dorm-mates had paused their conversation and were now at the edge of your bed looking at you with worried expressions. 
“What’s wrong?” One of them asked.
“N-nothing.” You lied. 
They either believed it or knew better than to pressure you into saying anything. They simply just nodded and quickly left the dorm to give you your space which you silently thanked them for. When the door closed behind them you fell back onto the bed, your head buried into your pillow as your sobs filled the room. The letter clutched tightly in your arms until you had fallen asleep. 
When you woke up the next morning you immediately sat up to make sure that no one had taken the letter and read it. You sighed in relief when it was still in your hands and hid it before getting ready for the day. Getting ready as if you hadn’t just found out that the love of your life was killed the day before. No one could find out. 
You were thankful that there was only a week left before the Christmas holidays. Though you had plans to meet with Regulus over the break, you would now be spending them grieving a boy that no one but you and Kreacher knew had passed.  You only hoped that the week would end quickly. 
---
Kreacher greeted you at the door. 12 Grimmauld Place felt colder and lonelier than ever as you stepped inside. 
The House Elf led you to the Drawing Room where a yellow locket rested on a table. You looked back at Kreacher who nodded, already knowing what you were going to ask. 
“So this was the Dark Lord’s Horcrux, Salazar Slytherin’s locket.” You thought to yourself as you picked it up to examine it. 
“Kreacher has not been able to destroy it.” The old House Elf croaked. 
“And why would Kreacher do such a thing?” A voice said suddenly from behind the two of you. You instinctively grabbed your wand, ready to defend yourself and Kreacher but as you turned around two spells were shot towards you. The locket along with your wand dropped to the ground and a third spell was aimed at your chest, causing you to stumble and fall onto your back. 
Kreacher tried to intervene but with a wave of their wand, the attacker who you have yet to get a clear look at, sent the House Elf flying into the closest wall. By the time he was on his feet, the attacker was standing by your side and harshly grabbed your shoulder before apparating out of the house. Kreacher stood there for a moment, taking in the fact that he had failed his Master not just once but twice. 
“My Lord, this is the girl.” Your attacker said, they bowed at the tall dark figure who stood before them and that was when you finally recognized who it was. Bellatrix Lestrange, Regulus’s cousin who was an extremely loyal Death Eater to the Dark Lord. It was said that she was even obsessed with him and you wondered how twisted someone must be to be obsessed with a man like him.
“And where is the locket?” The figure, who you assumed was the Dark Lord, asked. His voice was calm which surprised you. You expected him to sound colder, cruel even. 
“I-I didn’t see it.” Was Bellatrix’s reply which caused the Dark Lord to finally turn around. 
“Well then, why don’t we ask our guest then.” He suggested as he slowly stepped closer towards you. Crouching down in front of you, he placed two fingers under your chin and lifted your head up so that you were looking him in the eye. 
You were once told that the Dark Lord was actually an attractive young man while studying at Hogwarts. Many girls fawned over him but he paid them no mind. He seemed to have his own gang of ‘friends’ who ended up to be his very first Death Eaters. No one would have thought that the he would have rose to power at such an early age. Over the years, as he started to become a dark wizard was when his features started to look less human but they were subtle. From a glance you would have assumed that he was just another wizard but upon closer inspection you noticed the subtle snake-like features. 
“Now, have you seen a yellow locket? More specifically, one that shouldn’t have been touched from the start.”He asked you calmly, a wicked smirk on his lips as he watched you try to appear calm. 
“No.” You lied through gritted teeth. 
His smirk seemed to grow as he let go from your chin. “Liar!” He seethed as he stood up straight. 
He turned to Bellatrix who stood behind you and you felt your heart drop to your stomach when you heard him say, “Bella, do as you please.”
The sounds of his footsteps retreating echoed through the dimly lit room and when the door behind him closed shut you prayed, prayed for some sort of God or deity to spare you from what you knew was going to come. 
“Looks like we are going to have some fun.” She said in a sickly sweet tone before grabbing her wand and pulling you up by your shoulder. 
It felt like hours had gone by as you laid on the cold ground, not you minded. You liked the cold ground. It was better than Bellatrix’s wand burning into your skin or the cruciatus curse that felt like white-hot knives piercing your skin. 
Just when you had thought it was over, the pain filled your body again. Your bones felt like they were on fire and you tried to bite back a scream. Bellatrix only giggled, seeming to love the pain she was inflicting as she rasped her wand and pointed it at you again. 
“Please.” You had managed to say. Due to the hours of torture you had just gone through you were surprised you had enough strength to even speak. 
Bellatrix lowered her wand, her eyes no longer bearing that maniac look that often filled her eyes as her expression looked more sympathetic. At this point you were far too weak to even try and figure out if this was all an act or not. A part of you told you to not get your hopes up but on the verge of death, your hopes were already far too high. 
She crouched down and leaned towards your ear, her signature smirk returning to her face as she whispered, “You should’ve told him where it was.” before one last spell shot out form her wand.
“Avada Kedavra.” 
Your body fell limp and during the last second before death greeted you, a small smile appeared on your lips as your last thoughts were of finally reuniting with Regulus. Then quicker than ever, darkness flooded your vision and you welcomed it.  
--- 
When you opened your eyes again it was no longer darkness that flooded your vision but bright white light. Once your vision adjusted you noticed you were at Kings Cross Station except it was entirely white. Even the clothes you wore were all white. Was this the afterlife? 
“He’s waiting for you.” A familiar voice said and you turned around to see your grandmother. You didn’t hesitate for a second as you ran towards her to hug her, a chuckle escaping her lips as she hugged you back. You had lost her the summer before you started Hogwarts and it pained you to not be able to tell her what you experienced there. You knew she would’ve loved to hear what you had to say but maybe now, 6 years later, you could finally tell her. 
“As much as I’d love to hear about your years at Hogwarts, I have to wait for someone else.” Your grandmother said as if she had read your mind.
“Mom...” 
“Yes my child, though worry not, it is not her time yet.” 
Silence draped itself onto the two of you as you realized that your parents had no idea that you had died. You simply told them that you were going to a friend’s house and that you’d be back for dinner but now that wouldn’t be happening. 
“They’ll be fine, don’t worry about them. What you should be worrying about is keeping him waiting.” Your grandmother said and you looked at her with a confused expression. 
“He?” You asked, not sure who she could have been referring to. She simply smiled and then it clicked in your head. Regulus.
“Take the train down three stops, get off and wait until the train is gone before getting off the platform. He’ll be there waiting for you.” With one last hug, you left your grandmother and hopped onto the train that arrived a few minutes after. You followed her instructions, getting off at the third stop and waiting until the train was fully gone before getting off of the platform. 
Getting off of the platform, you were relieved to see that everything wasn’t all white but instead, was the countryside with farm animals and a small cottage. There was a feeling inside you that wanted for you to go towards the cottage. 
“I’m already dead so what’s the worst that could happen?” You thought to yourself before heading towards the cottage. 
The closer you got the more nostalgic you felt though you couldn’t figure out how. By the time you were standing on the front door step, you could’ve sworn that you’ve seen the cottage somewhere before. 
Before you could even knock, the door swung open and a head of black curly hair immediately pulled you into their embrace. You stood there unsure of what was happening until the familiar scent of the boy you loved filled your senses. 
“Regulus...” You said softly, as if trying to confirm whether it was really him or not that was hugging you so tightly. 
He pulled away, hands no longer holding you close to him but now cupping your face. Tears filled both your eyes though neither of you knew who started crying first. 
“You’re such an idiot.” He tried joking as he buried your face in his chest. He held you close, pressing kisses into your hair as tears streamed down both your faces. 
“I love you.” You said, lifting you head up from his chest to look into his eyes that you were starting to miss. You were happy to see that they didn’t look so dull anymore.
“I love you more. But that doesn’t mean you’re not an idiot. I told you to take your time which meant not to go and try to destroy the Horcrux. I even told Kreacher to protect you but clearly-” Pulling his face closer to yours so that you could kiss him caused his lecture to abruptly stop as he melted into the kiss. 
The moment lasted for a while but ended far too quickly in your opinion as Regulus pulled away and started to lecture you again causing you to roll your eyes. 
“You can lecture me all you want but could you at least tell me why we’re here?” You stopped him mid-lecture, pointing to the area surrounding you. For some reason it felt like home.  
“This was the life you wanted when you asked me to run away with you,” He replied with a smile that quickly dropped, “I’m sorry for not taking your hand that night. Life would’ve been different, maybe even better if I had but I was scared. I’m so sorry.”
You flashed him a soft smile, pulling his face closer to yours so that you could press a kiss to his check. A blush bloomed on his cheeks and though he tried to hide it, he knew it was no use and just gave up.
The two of you stood there for a while. Not a word being scad but instead, a comforting silence as you both took in each-others appearance. It’s been a while since either of you have been able to feel this peaceful.
“So this is the other side?” You asked breaking the silence. 
“I think so yeah. Why? You don’t like it?” The smile on his face turned into a worried expression as he looked at you. His reaction caused you to laugh. Ignoring his questioning look, you placed your hand into his and leaned your head against his shoulder. 
“No no, I like it though I don’t really care where we are.” 
“And why is that?” 
“Because I have you with me.” You replied, looking up at him with a smile which he mirrored. 
“You’re such a sap.” He teased. 
“But you still love me.”
“And I always will.”
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iamanartichoke · 3 years
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I completely agree with your post about Tom. People’s entitlement over their favourite celebrities goes to far. And tbh I really hate when fans act like they know for sure how he feels and what he’s thinking based on very ambiguous “evidence”. This is usually done so people can align Tom’s views with their own which requires most of the time someone else to be villanised. What I mean is that fans have no actual proof that the writers, producers and director of Loki are bad people and that Tom is unhappy with the directions the show took. There is usually nothing to be inferred about who these people are beyond their merits as professionals. But fans present their assumptions as facts anyway and that has evolved into actual harassment of the production team. All the while piggybacking on this idea that Tom thinks exactly what like them. And I am saying this as someone who hated TR and thinks Loki was deliberately made weaker/less important so Thor could shine more. And someone who hates pretty much all of Mike Waldron’s previous work on Rick and Morty. But is still feels very presumptuous to act like these people deliberate compromised the their own work because they hate Loki and his fans. And that they are filled with every prejudice know to man. And it’s also very demeaning to victimise Tom in the process. Of course some of the people involved suck but most of the time these assumptions have no basis whatsoever. And there is also an over-identification going on between some fans and Tom which isn’t healthy for anybody.
Sorry it took me several days to get to this, anon. It took me a minute to get my thoughts in order. But in a nutshell, yeah, I agree with a lot of the things you pointed out here - especially with fans acting like they know for a fact what he's thinking or feeling.
Under the cut for length and a bit of wank and disagreement w/ the "Marvel hates Loki" discourse so please skip if you don't want to see it.
A lot of the Loki series wank is rooted in whether or not Tom actually likes the series and significantly contributed to it, or if he's just saying what he has to say for publicity and his ideas and contributions were largely ignored. None of us will ever know for sure, bc none of us are Tom and none of us were directly involved in the series, so it's moot speculation, really. But it seems to basically come down to people trying to reconcile their feelings about the show with their feelings about Tom.
I don't necessarily think there's anything wrong with believing that Tom's hands were tied to an extent and/or he just says things that he has to for promotion, but I also don't think that it should be treated as fact and then used as, like, ammunition against other people working on the show. I personally have not seen anyone I know or am friendly with taking their complaints to the level of harassment of actual people irl (that seems to be more of a twitter thing, as far as I can tell, and imo comes from an entirely different place than just hating the show [I think there's an inherent meanness in people whose instincts are to harass and bully bc they want to actively make others feel like shit]) but I do see it posted as fact, time and time again, that the showrunners had a personal vendetta against Loki and were intent on making the series as bad as possible, and that Tom was helpless to do anything about it.
Which I get, in a way, bc I personally believe that the Russos had, if not a vendetta, an active dislike of Loki and a vested interest in getting him "out of the way" in a manner that would make him look pathetic in IW - but, I certainly can't say that's the case for sure, and I also think it's a little different bc Tom's contractual obligations for his film appearances were likely very different than what he (and/or his people) negotiated for the show.
That's neither here nor there but my point is, I can understand where the theories come from but I just don't think that's the case here, and seeing it so often makes me feel kinda uncomfortable (for a lot of reasons but also) bc, imo, it undermines Tom's autonomy for fans to act as if he's little more than a puppet on a string, just saying whatever he has to say to please the powers that be. Like, yes, there are legally binding contracts that probably limit how candid he can be, and we all know that he sugarcoats things and never says anything bad about anyone, which can make him seem like a bit of an "unreliable narrator" when he gushes about the show -
- but, he's also a big name celeb (I mean, the studio has always banked on his name being attached to the project bc he's the one who would draw in the most viewers). He's got clout (is that the right word?) to back him up - they wanted him, specifically, to play Loki in this series. Without Tom, there's no show. So why would they want to alienate him, silence him, or dismiss him when he comes to the table and says "here are my ideas"?
My point is, it's unfair and, yes, demeaning to act as if Tom is this voiceless, powerless victim who has no choice but to act in a series he hated that was purposefully trying to destroy his character, and then to turn around and mindlessly sing its praises while promoting it.
I think that the truth is somewhere in the middle - Tom's creative control was likely limited bc he wasn't the director and wasn't the showrunner or head writer, and no one person is ever completely in control when it comes to the end result that we, the audience, end up seeing on the screen anyway. He may not have been entirely happy with every writing or directing choice that was made. But it's also very unlikely that he had no say at all or that any input he had was dismissed (or 95% of it, as it were); again, the series is banking on his name being the draw and he has the advantage of being an authority on Loki while also being intelligent and eloquent enough to convey his perspective on the character. I think that the real issue is that Tom's current perspective and/or interpretation of Loki no longer aligns with his interpretation of OG Loki from 2011-13. Which is, admittedly, a very hard pill to swallow.
Anyway, this may have veered off in another direction and idek if you wanted this answered or to have a conversation or maybe you were just venting - but, here we are.
To make it less about Loki specifically and more about Tom in general, though, yeah, ultimately I just wish his fans wouldn't feel so entitled toward him and his opinions, or his career choices, or his love life, or his clothes. I was browsing one of the Tom ask blogs (or maybe it was a Zawe one, I don't remember now) the other day and I find it really creepy, for lack of a better word, at how invested people are in Tom's, like, day-to-day whereabouts. Someone saw him at a restaurant in NYC - I wonder if he's still there today? Where's he staying? Is he there as a tourist or for work reasons? Who could he be meeting with in New York? A producer? Another play? Will he host SNL? Is Zawe still with him or did she go back to London? etc etc like, it really goes back to my original point in my original post which is, basically, who caaaaaaaares, why are you investing so much of your day trying to figure out what Tom is doing with his?
Now I'm just venting, but yeah ... shit's weird.
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alukaforyou · 4 years
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and ALSO sry to post bs on main im mostly just talking to myself in my personal tag half the time so yolo, no need to respond to this or reassure me or whatever but these days i licherally question how much of my - sry to sound like a broken record - bs is dépression or just my shité mentality, like i rly was not designed to last, huh? physically or mentally? lol. like who gets motion sickness on swings lmao anyways. i think i give up too easily. theres a bunch of reasons y but i dont feel like saying. its a different thing to kind of kno something, and to admit / speak it (confront it). i could psychoanalyze myself all day and tell u exactly why some things are the way they are but its too unpleasant to neatly state stuff like that u kno?? like... *i kno* but im not gonna say i kno. anywho, i digress. so i give up easily and kind of have a defeatist mentality too, its so exhausting lool. actually its weird cuz duality of man, i'll be rly determined / stubborn abt doing some stuff and not care abt fear of failure with certain things but when it comes to My Life / My Future i just think i cant rly do anything? i mean that literally like i got no skillz *laugh crying emoji* not particularly good at anything, and art - the only thing im maybe arguably ok at - i dont wanna do as a career, that is art therapy for me i dont feel like commercializing it. not interested in working in my major, maybe things wouldve been different if i went to culinary or cosmetology school?? that sounds fun. or if i majored in bio cuz i was so good at that, or even if i majored in japanese language or literature or idk. but no regrets tho cuz i learned a lot abt drawing in art school which i can use for myself. and hmm i like staying home and not rly going out of my way to meet new ppl so connections what? i h8 hearing how most opportunities come through the ppl u kno cuz its true and ik like 10 ppl tops so hm very sexi of me :^) i just feel like im p much f*cked and it rly doesnt help that i have no functional dreams, goals, or aspirations nor the confidence and drive to work towards anything so ah ok cool. u kno suga's songs "the last" and "so far away" ? that p much sums up my feels minus the part abt having to deal w fame obviously LOL. its so easy being a student (for me at least) but being a good student isnt really worth a whole lot in the """""real world""""" and the current education system doesnt even rly prepare u for reality or w.e like Deep Sigh also the political climate rly lookin like shité out there like hmmmmm do i even wanna try so hard to be here anymore tho??? also going back to the self confidence thing, ya idk her LOOOOL like it doesnt very much bother me tho? i really, honest to god have no idea what my redeeming qualities even are. being nice? and my mindset re - tolerance and compassion for others, etc, ya im rly proud of that actually but besides that i mean like what can i Do tho like hm im not particularly good at anything also im hideous like uglee but thats ok too like none of this Bothers me, thats just literally how i Am so ok fine, but i feel like it makes it hard for me to exist in the world i happen to be in??? and i realize im speaking with a huge bias here cuz my brain is totally out of whack im p sure if some1 saw me / read this they would lit be like um u literally do not have it hard girl, which is fair ur kinda right actually from an objective pov, probably? its amazing how um. hard? of a time my brain is having given my relatively ok circumstances but thats just how it is ig. and if i may quote shakespeare - o full of scorpions is my mind. and its weird cuz duality of man - i actually have a lot of good times w friends and whatever i have a lot of fun, im not even very Sad or in Agony its all very a mild? sensation? but that might be because my plan b is to simply *** so nothing rly fazes me anymore lool.
its usually a v confusing emotion, im either feeling happy, or if not that, very ???? im literally that duwang quote get a feeling so complicated its just "ajdjsjsja" idk its not overly repulsive and upsetting im like :s LOL u kno wat at this point idek what im even saying anymore but its good that im writing whatever cuz im gonna need to look back on this later and organize my thoughts for presentation cuz remember i have a s.o now???? i wanna let them kno so we r on the same page, and i dont feel like im tricking them, i thought it over more and there are like 4? major cards i wanna lay out on the table early on and they are 1. im not that close w my family emotionally so do not seek their approval or expect to deal with them much. 2. personal ideology / political views like im bi lmao and pro lgbt if that wasnt obvious also i dont rly wanna be around racists / terfs etc and if ur right wing or not on that respect women juice uhhh bye.. 3. my weak ass mentality how i might Maybe *** in the future like no promise but errrr theres one more but its a little more negotiable and also too early to discuss so i wont mention it but i already got the first two outta the way so ya. theres the most troublesome of all, #3. the last thing i wanna do is traumatize someone that loves me (and i love back) with that kinda thing, its too late for my dear friends whom i love, sorry i didnt kno i was gonna be like this LOL yall already got attached but its a little different with my s.o cuz i feel like its not too late to uh.... stop getting as attached LMAO like dam i've known my girls for almost 10 years whereas i've only known my s.o for like a month.
and this is totally not gonna come across right but if my s.o very understandably desides to dump me id be SO RELIEVED LIKE WOOOO ok cool cuz like essentially what i'd be saying is you are getting attached to someone who's future is not as stable as other people, including u. *huge exhale* from the bottom of my heart, my bad lol. and then i probs wont ever get involved w. a s.o again, sorry to reference snk in 2020 but remember how e*win smith is single cuz he doesnt kno when he will ***? big mood. i have never acted out on my interests before but i was like ok for once lets go off the shits and do smth ooc, i uh... didnt expect for it to actually go anywhere tho so now im like ???? i shouldve thought it through more tho, like i felt low key irresponsible af and selfish and dumb for getting involved w. someone even tho i Know how I Am like...... Also i just lov being single and staying home and chilling alone lmao like i seriously...... never get loney....
ok so what was i talking abt? how the passage of time makes me nervous cuz idk how i can manage to keep up w it??? how i feel like i cant do jack shit???? that life is hard???? and maybe a bih just wants to rest? permanently?????? i think the most irritating part of all for me, like what i am most mad about at myself is that i have no dream. yikes. naruto, do u think thats sad? well yoongi said its okay, and what counts is just being happy, so i will console myself and forgive her and idk just try my best for the time being??
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chmpn-remix · 4 years
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Big bts medieval AU
god okay FINE I'm posting it here because I'm so tired of sending screenshots 😭😭
[[MORE]]
namjoon: son of one of the king's subjects, young genius military general
tae: crown prince, protected and educated
jin: son of the kingsguard or st, tae's tutor
hobi: son of someone important in the court, eventually hand of the king
jungkook: (some gendry baratheon esque origin story?), just a stable boy/blacksmith who becomes friends with them and maybe eventually becomes Important
jimin: prince from another kingdom, v hot
yoongi: thief/rebel/hitman, v close friends with jk
• tae has three childhood friends: namjoon, hobi, and jin
• they play together a lot and when they get old enough for riding lessons they get to know and play with jungkook too, the stable boy's tiny son
• everything is very cute, childhood friends in the palace, they get into mischief, they gotta save baby jk out of trouble sometimes or st
• when they hit early teens they start training for different things. tae is a prince and he hates the weapon practice (he's a little better with a bow and arrow but his dad insists on him learning the sword), he also learns about history and diplomacy from jin (who becomes his tutor), and strategy from jin and also namjoon, who's getting more weapons and strategy training from jin's dad the head of the kingsguard (sometimes he just hangs around during the history lessons too bc he's fascinated)
• hmmm during this time joon may or may not have a crush on seokjin :0 he's older and smart and sociable okay
• hobi and jin have a thing for helping out/hanging around the kitchens sometimes, more than the others
• hobi drops by the lessons sometimes too, hes the best archer out of all of them, he's super charismatic and friendly and he ends up getting trained as the future hand of the king (he can also usually talk his way out of any trouble pfft)
~~
• so their early/mid-teens happen and it gets even harder to hang out/get playtime
• yes yes jin starts looking a bit more mature and is cute, namjoon and hobi have stupid crushes on him and tae notices but rolls his eyes and doesnt say anything
• and then, One summer, namjoon starts training in swordfighting more intensively and puberty hits him like a brick wall
• everyone, even tae, was kinda lowkey thirstin
• they once watched namjoon train (jin was rarely out in the training field bc he's gonna be a scholar not a fighter, so he's like gulps waow he looks good, hobi is staring at joon's muscles, tae was like okay maybe I do like boys too cool that's convenient bc in this universe alliances can also be made with same sex marriage, even jk is like wow namjoon hyung ur so strong!! with big googly eyes)
• hobi whistles and namjoon fumbles with his practice sword and drops it LMAO and they're like yep there's the namjoon we know moment's over
• and then they just all go Thru it ykno puberty is a thing. hobi gets more beautiful, tae is still gangly/short and his face is somehow too long and small at the same time and he thinks he still looks basically the same as when he was 10 (he complains about it to himself)
• tae doesnt mind the lessons with jin, hates the weapons practice, but honestly what he loves the most is drawing. he has drawings of his friends, drawings of them just chilling, drawings of hobi and joon training (hobi looks so graceful 🥺), but his favorite is just sitting on a mound of hay at the stables and drawing jungkook while jungkook goes around doing stable boy work
• tae doesnt know when it happens, but jk also hits puberty and he realizes that when he's shading in jk's shoulder muscles and biceps and he internally goes "wow, he's attractive" "wow, I like jungkook"
• "oh no, I like the stable boy"
• tae avoided the stables for a like a week while he tried to process his feelings but things go back to normal eventually. jk was sad but he's sure prince taehyung has a lot of stuff on his hands
• the first time tae comes back jk addresses him formally and tae was taken aback like why are u calling me your grace?? we're really good friends? jk shrugs and goes "I can go back to calling you taehyung" "please" and everything mostly goes back to normal after that. tae hides his feelings to be processed another day, or to just go away. he's destined to be betrothed to another prince anyways
~~
• they start turning 18 and they start doing actual jobs in the castle. joon proved himself to be super smart and he's been promoted to a junior advisor to the military general/kingsguard commander person
• jin becomes a full time scholar and hangs out at the library. sometimes namjoon comes in and borrows books and he's still flustered around jin even though they've known each other their whole life
• hobi is THE best event planner and also micromanages everything else as the hand of the king, also works closely with tae about events and balls and council meetings, which tae attends more and more as his 18th birthday draws near and he'll be expected to start making actual decisions and be an official member
• tae is a little intimidated by how good hobi is getting at micromanaging the kingdom and sometimes thinks hobi would make a better ruler instead :(
• the summer before tae turns 18 jungkook goes away for the summer to idk take care of his sick grandma at the countryside or st, tae is grumpy and he could easily arrange for kook's grandma to be brought to the castle and taken care of by handmaids and stuff but that's cheating (a big theme for this fic is maybe even though tae is maybe the next in line for most powerful person he still feels trapped and limited by his position)
• anyways while jungkook was away that's when he meets yoongi, may have dabbled in a bit of Anarchism™️ with him idek
• in the fall JK comes back and is HOTTER than ever and tae is STILL so damn gay for him and something's changed like...there's more tension between the two of them when they see each other but they barely do throughout the fall because tae is so busy with castle responsibilities now with his 18th birthday happening so soon
• tae turns 18 and hobi arranges for him to meet his betrothed, the prince from another kingdom who tae has to marry for alliance purposes
• he's managed to squash his feelings for jungkook but he still draws, he has like a sketchbook full of drawings of him akdjdk at one point jungkook asks "are all your drawings of me, hyung?" in a light but lowkey flirty tone and tae just deadpans "sometimes I draw the horses, or the hay"
• anyways, prince jimin will be staying at tae's family castle for the year as the two get to know each other better
• jimin looks HELLA ethereal and light and tae is INTIMIDATED he makes a fool out of himself trying to be too formal or official or whatever and jimin just laughs (lightly, like flower petals) and tells tae to chill, it's okay
• they talk about the little things like the climate and the food and hobbies etc
• jimin is v friendly and charismatic and half of it is for show but not in a bad way. he knows how to play the crowd and play the flirty charismatic prince, but deep inside he's sad that he's trapped in this life and sometimes thinks about flying away to another life
• there's not really any romantic chemistry between vmin but one day they were just chatting in tae's room when jimin suddenly? kisses him?? Tae is SHOCKED his hands are over his mouth touching his lips like oh god...that was my first kiss....and his stomach turns because it wasn't with jungkook
• jimin is profusely apologizing and freaking out a bit like "I'm sorry, I've never been betrothed before, idk what I'm doing I thought it would be good to try? to see if we work? like that?? I just want to make this work" and they figure out that jimin kissed tae bc he felt like he had to :( they figure out that they dont really have any romantic feelings for each other but that's okay they respect and appreciate each other a lot! (jimin may or may not know about tae's crush, maybe just that there's someone out there he likes, and jimin is in love with freedom but can never have it) ("what about you?" "Me?" Jimin gave a knowing while, his answer ready. "I'm in love with open doors and fields stretched out for miles. I'm in love with the stars and the infinite mysteries they hold." "Are you always this grossly poetic?" Jimin just laughs and shoves tae lightly.)
• anyways vmin bffs!! they chill and they remain platonic, because tae is still so so gay for jungkook
• especially now that his baby fat is starting to go away and his features are getting sharper, his muscles even MORE defined how is that possible
• tae is doing a p good job of looking more mature too he's starting to fill out his gangly body more, his face less childish and more "regal," as jungkook describes one day
• jk totally has an Oh moment too like "I never noticed your face" "what about my face" "it's so...it's a prince's face" "...what's that supposed to mean"
• they ride together sometimes and one day when the castle responsibilities are too much tae grabs a basket of food and drink from the kitchens, rides out somewhere to the meadows with jungkook and has a picnic with him
• they've snuck food out and hung out before but this time it felt a little different on the way back like they're both like it's time to go and jungkook grabs the harness/leash for the horses and leads tae's horse to him and they just share a look, both of their hands touching the leather strap of the harness
• nothing happens they get to the castle and that night tae DOESNT think about how he shouldve kissed jk right there and DOESNT think about jungkook's big defined muscles holding him down
• YOONGI IS SUPPOSED TO KIDNAP TAE FOR RANSOM TO FEED HIS TOWN/FAMILY BUT ACCIDENTALLY TAKES JIMIN INSTEAD
• jk: the prince is very beautiful
yg: [sees jimin and thinks it's tae] yes, very beautiful
• yoonmin have heated/enlightening discussions about Government. hot.
• yoongi is angry at the noble class for hoarding all the resources. jimin reasons that they give fairly. yoongi complains about his family/town starving in the streets etc more medieval government discourse
• jimin is the trapped bird in a cage and sees yoongi as the Freedom and adventure that he wants. yoongi was supposed to complete a mission but he falls for jimin instead
• (jk has to be promoted somehow so he can look nice and be in the castle akdjd) (and be promoted so tae can acceptably smooch him) - JK SAVES TAE from somethinG like he brought tae home on horseback and then gets appointed as tae's personal escort/bodyguard
• BEFORE I FORGET taekook kiss eventually and of course it happens in the stables and right after the first kiss jk leads him to like behind this post or st so passersby cant see them immediately and they kiss more and in between jk just chuckles/laughs and tae is like :(?? what and jk is like nothing its just that I've seen you trip over [the hay? the fences?] so many times in here and tae is like >:(( are u gonna reminisce about our childhood or keep making out with me
There was an ending here but I think it's in my other doc skdjsk ah well you'll just have to deal with this :)
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Text
BTS as boyfriends :)
So basically... One of the posts Id read this morning inspired me to do one of these myself... Just a write up of what I think each of them would be like as a boyfriend... I hope you like it!
Okay scratch that.. This is super long... Idek anymore.. This man is the death of me.
Suga:
1. Quiet... But not shy
He's the type to voice his opinions when he deems necessary and not a moment before, but that doesn't mean he's not confident enough to talk out loud. He won't hesitate from whispering his thoughts on how stellar you look in those soft cotton sleep shorts just as you're drifting to sleep. Nor will he refrain from holding your shoulders firmly and telling you to calm down when you look like you're about to burst into tears from a bad grade or a bad day at work. He talks when required and not a moment after. Ready with reasoning, graphs and statistics against every insecurity, every worry and every aspect of life you're unsure of. But at the same time he'll listen as your paint your toenails while you're sitting on the couch, ingulfed into this frame as you talk about your childhood or about the girls at work and what you thought about that dress at the local shopping mall. He knows when you're talking just for the sake of talking and when you need him to give input and advice.
2. Dates
I picture him to be the kind of person who loves stay-at-home dates. Like the two of you just sit on the window sill and talk... But there are also moments of silence and he's rubbing circles into your wrists while pressing kisses into the back of your head. He knows he's far away from you for far too long and hes trying his best to just feel you with him. Almost stock up on your presence and the particular way you smell in his embrace. I see you pressed onto his front as you talk about the things you see and if things are particularly boring on a rainy day; I see you folding your knees to your chest and placing the laptop on them while wraps his arms around you. You're either watching movies or funny videos on YouTube and he laughs at the way you laugh, mentally notes down the way your head tilts back onto his shoulder and giggles when you let out a few snorts in between.
I also see him as the type to love midnight walks... I think the darkness allows him to be more free and natural and that's why the two of you decide to take strolls late into the night. Its these short, spontaneous dates that has him opening up for a change, just endlessly talking about what he wants from life, where he sees himself, his music and his inspiration, about the little glitch on stage that day and how the members are doing. Its times like these he spills his heart out and you don't say a word... Because he doesn't need advice, he needs support and attention in the most mundane of ways. I see him just holding your hand on these occasions, swinging it between you and smiling as he does... Holding your hand is a way he reminds himself that he's with you. Afterwards, I see him going home and dropping one text that says '' I love you'' and sleeping with phone on his lap because he's so emotionally relaxed now.
But at the same time... I see Yoongi as a crazy lil bean... He's the type to stay up till 4 am and compile a list of all the restaurants that cater to the cuisine you said you liked almost 5 months ago. I see him as the type to remember the tiny tiny things you mentioned in one of your long monologues and take them up when you've forgotten all about them. Yoongi does a lot of reading up on things you like... Be it books or art or history because he feels that way he can relate to the things you talk about.. But you'll never realise he's working that hard cause he's so damn subtle about it? Randomly giving Shakespeare references in the middle of your conversation because you might have mentioned your deep love for hamlet.
3. Fights
Tbh...they will happen. Can't be ignored. Everyone fights once in a while. He doesn't strike me as the type to grovel on his knees if he thinks he's at fault, he's the type to crawl into bed and whisper apologies into your ear assuming you're asleep. Worst comes to worst he's casually slipping in a small bouquet of flowers into your hands when you answer the door... Probably not even looking at you when he does. Not because he has an ego issue and thinks he's apologising for no reason, but because he thinks he caused all of this mess and wonders why you're still stuck with him. However those insecurities aren't spoken about because he isn't brave when it comes to his feelings.
I don't see angry make up sex, I see long drawn out sessions of love because he thinks '' why would I make her mad and make her cry... I need to make this up to her...''
On the other hand... When you make him mad... I see him just wanting space initially and then maybe you can go up to him with a peace offering of food and slip in a few sorrys. He's a lil fluff ball, will 13/10 melt at your attempt.
4. Intimacy
Ridiculously long and drawn out. He takes his time with everything and you're in for a hell of a ride. Will 300% have you almost passing out before he thinks about actually having sex with you. What is a quickie? Pretty vanilla on locations I think... Loves how homely the bedroom feels? But you've definitely shared intimacy in his studio. Its his special place and you being there with him makes it even more special.
You're so tired after everything that you sleep immediately but this situation is the one time he avoids falling asleep... Because he loves watching you. He loves looking at you and how you're so natural and beautiful and perfect just for him... Pride that he has you, that you chose him to be the one who gets to see you at your most vulnerable. He'll take his time studying you and then pull you up onto him and drift off to sleep. But because he spent so much time analysing last night... You wake up first and end up looking at him for a good hour... So happy that he's yours. Its a beautiful cycle of staring really... And you love it because it leads to spending the whole day bed... Making love and staring at each other with big mushy heart eyes.
I think he is a dom when the situation demands it... Like when you're being unnecessarily cranky or paranoid, the control and power help you to come out of your little cave... But he's also pretty vanilla and ready to let you think you have the lead once in a while.
5. Gorgeous human being- 10000/1
Absolutely beautiful... Supports you through everything and doesn't say a word with regards to your life decisions because he knows you're smart enough and brave enough to have the world at your disposal if need be.
I think the two of you spend a lot of time in his studio and you draw a lot of energy and inspiration from each other. You'll be the only one he gives his studio passcode too and thats his way of showing how much you mean to him. I see him putting up a little coffee table on there so you can bring in your work. He'll give you sound cancelling earphones and you can be bent over the desk writing as he finishes up with his work. Sometimes you just sleep on the sofa that he's got there and he'll either tuck you into his arms and sleep with you or pick you up and take up into the bedroom. He loves how adorable you look with giant headphones on and sneakily takes a few photos- you'll probably never even know they exist.
I see you bringing him coffee into the studio... One giant mug and he pulls you onto his lap and you sit there- reading your book while he works..the two of you sipping the drink occasionally. You fall asleep on his lap and he keeps you snuggled into him because your heartbeat warms him up.
Loves it when you try to rap and when you sing as you're cleaning the kitchen or cooking or painting... Sees you as a fluff ball and fights to protect. He teaches you a lot unknowingly.
Such a gorgeous human being. 
To read Jungkook’s Version, click here :)
To read Jimin’s Version, click here :)
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ais-n · 6 years
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Hi Ais! Sorry to bother you. I just need someone to talk to about this. I have been writing since i was like 15. My dream have always been to write a book. And i have started a lot of them but never finished anything. It’s like i get stuck at one point and feel my story is trash so i stop. Sometimes i find my plot boring and stupid and other times it’s my own inability to properly put it into words. I admire you and i wish i could write like you. I hope you never stop writing wonderful stories❤️
You’re so sweet, thank you!
I’m not sure if it would help to get a long ass rambling answer to this to encourage you to keep going based on my personal experience… but just in case it would, here goes:
It’s really hard to actually finish projects… starting them is so much easier. I get to a point where I’m like, “This is trash!” and/or I grow bored, and then I kind of peter out. I also have this unfortunate aspect of my personality where I figure I’m pretty unimportant and invisible, therefore what I have to say or write isn’t that particularly necessary for others to see, therefore it’s not that big of a deal if I just never post anything I did because I’d just be cluttering up the space where actual good writers or actual interesting people would be speaking instead. 
Sometimes I just want to write a story to see where it goes, and then once I get to a point I can figure out how it will probably end, and if no one else is reading it or interested in it, I’m kind of like, well I know how it ends so I guess there’s no real point in writing the rest of it out or posting it because that’s just extra work for no reason. It was a combination of that thought process, and the feeling of “this is trash! Start over!” that had me writing and rewriting and dropping and restarting and editing and dropping and rewriting Incarnations since I was 12-14… I keep forgetting if I started at 12, 13, or 14 on that book. I think 14? But then maybe it was actually 13? idek.
Point being, that was a book that I started, stopped, started, stopped, dropped entirely, on and off for years. The idea would be really strong in my head but then sometimes I’d forget about it for years, then remember it for a while, then avoid it because I felt like a failure. What I know is when I first wrote it, I got 150 pages before I thought it was trash and totally stopped it. In the ensuing 15ish years, I would think of that world and want to do something in it but I just did not want to pick up where I had left off. So what I did was I kept starting new scenes, creating new characters, adding new aspects to the world, and each time I’d get a little ways into it and then go UGH THIS IS BORING or THIS IS TRASH and stop/drop it again, until the next time when I started something new again. 
Around 2012, for Nanowrimo I tried starting it up again. I looked at the bits and pieces I’d written over the years, grabbed one of the scenes that seemed more interesting, started with that and ran with it. I met the requirements for nano, I liked the characters, I liked the new concept, but I still wasn’t sold on the book. I was kind of bored at the end of it because I didn’t fully know where I wanted to go with it… I was a little overwhelmed. It still didn’t really click with me to keep working on it again. I left it on the backburner for more years. 
At one point, I created a Scrivener project for it, and then as the years passed and I’d get a brief idea for something, I’d go open it up and throw that info into a note, or add a new document exploring the idea, or whatever. Sometimes I’d write another short scene, other times I’d just do that and go.
Sometimes I tried to do other stuff related to it which was not writing the actual book… like I created some Sims to look like the characters, to see if I wanted to change anything in the description when I got an idea of it visually. Far more recently, I started making some of the key buildings in Sims so I could get inspired for more details on those. Are they accurate? Absolutely not. But they gave me ideas. Same as I tried to store the inspiration I’d get when watching tv shows or movies or whatever, and it would make me think of the characters or world or some other aspect. If I was inspired to write, I’d go write a note or scene right then, but if it was just a vague inspiration I would just try to focus on it when it was there, and really acknowledge the importance of feeling that inspiration, but then not actually do anything about it. But that would keep it in my mind.
Another thing I did when I really wanted to write was I would go to sleep thinking about an aspect of the story, to try to make myself dream something related, so I would wake up with inspiration.
I also tried to inspire myself by buying some physical organization materials – I got a bunch of whiteboards so I could figure things out by writing it out, and I got a huge roll of white butcher paper so I could hand draw massive timelines for the characters to lay out their events and see whose overlapped with whose; I got a corkboard and pinned index cards and sticky notes to it and then took different colored strings and connected them across the board according to various criteria. I got notebooks and wrote out ideas and notes on the magic system and all sorts of things. I had gotten to a point where I was glad to have all the digital information but sometimes I needed something physical to work on, something tangible, so I felt like I actually had accomplished something and it wasn’t just in my head. I also made a book cover for the book (digitally) to remind myself to keep working on it, and made a digital map of the world with the help of a friend who’s good with geology so I had a reference I could hang about my computer.
Every time I had a thought or idea, or I had this vague restlessness of wanting to work on something but not feeling like actually writing, I tried to do something else related to it in some form. Usually world building or character creation of some sort, but sometimes just thinking about things.
I tried a lot of things, but in all honesty I figured I would never, ever finish that story. But then one day, and I don’t even remember what the catalyst was to be honest, it just… clicked. I had an idea for something, and when I went to write down that idea or do whatever with it, I remembered other notes I’d left over the years, other scenes, and I started looking at the massive amount of information I had compiled - and I realized, holy shit, I know how to connect this all. I found a way to pull together a lot of stories I’d made which I thought were all totally disconnected, and bring them into one theme. And when I did that, all these questions I had for this or that aspect of this or that, suddenly had really interesting answers or ideas I could roll with. 
I found a way to stop being bored. And now, when I find that I just really really don’t want to do the next thing, I try a few times to make myself do it if I’m just feeling like I’m being lazy, but if repeated attempts are unsuccessful then I throw myself a curveball in the story or plot or characters, and it becomes fun again to write and plot it out as I try to figure out how to integrate that. I do that until I run out of steam, and try the same things again.
Because of that, a couple of years ago, I finished the book, and I was really happy with it. I’m still proud of myself for finishing writing it, but now I’m on a two year slump of editing the damn thing. 
When I think back to the original story I wrote when I was younger, versus the book it became now and the series it’s starting, they are VERY different despite the fact that have the same initial basis. In fact, the original heroine of the book is now technically sort of a villain. Her story is the same; I just flipped the perspective. The original book was very base; I mean, at the time, I felt it would be interesting to write because it was a young woman as the main character with all the power, at a time when almost all the main characters I found to read were young men. 
But the thing is, it was otherwise a super basic concept. Young woman suddenly finds out she’s the chosen one, lots of cool magic, she goes through her whole storyline with how things affect the world around her, the end. The story might have worked and been interesting solely because I was like 14 when I wrote it; if it had been published then, people might have given me a bit of slack for some of the laziness just because I was young. But the story I have now, informed by decades of life and experience since then, is SO fucking much better than that book was originally. It’s way more complex, far more interesting, the worldbuilding is far beyond what I had before, the characters are more nuanced, the cast is more diverse, the prejudices are more tailored. I’m GLAD I put that book aside a million times. I’m GLAD I didn’t finish it any of the times I had it in my head I had to finish it by the time I was xyz age. I feel like the series it is now is going to be far beyond what it would have been if I’d run with the original idea.
You know what helped me A LOT in actually finishing it in the end? Aside from everything I said? 
I asked some friends to beta read it for me. And the people who read it really liked it, and gave me ideas on how to improve it. Their interest renewed my own interest and gave me enthusiasm I sometimes lacked on my own. I care a hell of a lot more about actually finishing something if someone else cares if I finish it.
Someone once asked Neil Gaiman how to be a good writer and get published, and one of his biggest recommendations was to just finish writing a book. He also said not to conform; to write the story that you want to write, that is right for you. I feel the same way, which is nice because Neil Gaiman is super dope so I feel better that my feeling is reflected in an actual successful and great writer. I feel a little safer in having my weird ass view on things, which is that I don’t believe in genres, really, or rather I don’t really believe in writing a story specifically for the boxes checked off for a specific genre. 
For me, anyway. It’s totally fine for others, if that’s their jam - there can be some great stories that way! 
But for me, I literally just do not want to write a story at all if I have to make it fit someone else’s label. I lose all interest in it and give up completely. I think that’s probably because when I started writing, it was because I was a nerdy ass  youngster who couldn’t find books that felt like they represented me exactly or what exactly I wanted to read, so I was kind of just like, “I guess I’ll write it, then.” There are tons of books out there that do fit the criteria of the genres, and they can be SUCH fun and good books to read… the people who write those books excel at that type of writing, and so if they tried doing anything else they would not be true to themselves. 
We need those writers and we need those books. But we also need the writers and the books that just say fuck it to everything and do what they want. You may not be as popular, or you may find it difficult to go the traditional route; maybe you can’t become a full-time writer, if everything is stacked against you, I don’t know. But you can write what feels right for you, and there will always be readers out there who needed that book to feel right for them.
My hope for you is you don’t silence yourself and your stories like I tend to do. I hope you finish your books/stories, and I hope you share them. There is probably someone out there wishing your book existed, and until you write it, they won’t have that exact perspective and that exact story to read. Don’t get discouraged if it takes you a long time; and don’t downplay the value of walking away and not thinking about it for a while at a time. But I do think there’s definite value in always coming back.
So what I hope you do for yourself is find some easy way to compile all the different information you’ve formed for your book(s) over the years so that you make it really easy on yourself to add extra bits and pieces as you go. I hope that you do other things that aren’t specifically writing but still get your creativity going for the stories - whether that’s making Sims, drawing art, writing things out on paper or whiteboards, doing everything digitally, doing everything physically, whatever it may be. I hope you find ideally a few someones to read what you have so far, get their take on it, and I hope they are enthusiastic enough to help you keep it in the forefront of your mind.
I TOTALLY understand having wanted to be a writer since you were young… I have always wanted to be a writer, as far back as I can remember. (Of course, if you go back far enough, I also wanted to be a veterinarian or other things too). 
My goal is still to someday be an actual author. I feel like I’m not, still, but maybe someday I will be. 
I used to put a ton of pressure on myself to finish things by certain ages, and when I missed my goal I got depressed and thought I was the worst and why bother, no one wants to read it anyway, and etc etc etc. Also, for like 10 of those years I was working on ICoS and that really took my mental energy and creative interest as a focus so I didn’t really even want to work on my LGBTQIA+ fantasy books for a while. But as time passed, and objectively looking at the story I have now compared to the story it was before, I think it was far better that I didn’t force the story before I was ready to write it, but also that I didn’t let myself just put it off forever and never make myself work on it again. 
There is no age limit to being a writer… first of all, you’re a writer if you write, so if you already wrote a bunch of books or parts of any stories - you are already a writer. You’ve already accomplished something awesome! But if your goal is to be a paid author/writer, then whether you are one now or one in 20 years or even 70, you still can be a writer. You still can fulfill that dream. Never give up on it, for yourself and for the diversity and complexity of the stories out there in the world, and for the readers who would want to see what you have to say.
Nanowrimo is next month… maybe you could start thinking about the stories you’ve worked on so far, see if any strike your fancy for exploring a bit further, or just take the general concept of one of the worlds and create a totally new set of characters and plotline on that world. Whether or not you end up liking that new plot, the new characters, it will still give you a more nuanced view of the world itself. It might spark an idea now or 20 years from now. It might, someday, be the key to finishing the story.
Don’t devalue the importance of those little bits and pieces, or the importance of taking your time but never giving up, or of even just talking the story out to others and seeing what they have to say. I constantly think what I write is boring and stupid, I constantly get suddenly bored with something and just cannot for the life of me write the next chapter no matter what because it sucks ass. 
So I switch it up. I push aside for a moment what I thought I had to do next, and then I ask myself, “What can I add that would make me actually want to write this?” I’ve found that by doing that, you can get some super interesting new ideas that coordinate together out of nowhere later if you just keep going. 
So maybe for nano, you can ask yourself, “What would I want to write in this world or this character’s life, etc, that would make me actually want to write it?” Completely forget about it fitting perfectly with what you have. Screw that. Just make it fun for you. I feel like it’s a very natural writer thing to do where even if you start with something that seems extremely disparate, as long as they’re following the same general world rules, eventually you’ll have an epiphany that ties it all together. 
Also ask yourself, are you trying to make the characters conform to the plot, or letting the plot conform to the characters? If your world or characters want to veer totally off from what was planned, as long as it’s in character - follow them, not your plans. You wrote those plans when you had a limited understanding of the characters and world… the time you spent with them since then is valuable and shouldn’t be ignored. If they want to send you on a wild goose chase into the middle of nowhere when they’re supposed to be doing something else entirely, do it. Follow that goose. See where it leads you, and then see how fun it is trying to make your way back.
Maybe you can try that this nano (or just do a totally new story altogether if that’s your jam instead), and see where it takes you. Maybe you can find some people to read it, and maybe you can track all the info you put together, no matter how small and stupid it may seem. And maybe, someday, you’ll be able to look back years later like me, and thank your past self for never giving up and for keeping that information accessible so that one day, far down the line, you’d have everything you needed at your fingertips when a sudden idea inspires you to look at your story, characters, or world, from an angle you’d never considered before.
Also, fwiw, I like to always throw one thing in that’s a bit unexpected, if possible, into characters or plots. In all honesty, I do that in part because I get bored affffff very easily so I want to keep myself entertained. But it also makes for a lot more interest, I think, in the characters. Like, whatever the plot is, or the character is, think about what would be the easy next thing… think about what the stereotype of that would be. And then deliberately choose something either completely different or a little bit off in order to introduce intrigue.
ICoS, for example - Boyd was judged a lot for many things, and he wasn’t really good around people naturally. It would have been easy to say that because he was kind of socially distant/awkward he would suck at undercover, but to me that wasn’t interesting. Instead, he could go undercover and be very good at it when needed because, despite his natural reticence to trust others, he had spent his life watching other people trying to learn their behavior/mimic them to understand why people didn’t like him. So even though on his own he would hate going into a party or have no fucking clue what to say, if he was playing a character, he was very good at it because he had gathered that information for years. Instead of saying that because he was bullied he didn’t know how to deal with people, I said he knew how to deal with people because he was bullied.
Incarnations, for example - Vikenti is a magical cop who’s really grouchy, kind of rude, kind of a dick. He spends most of his time seemingly insulting everyone around him. It would have been easy to just make him be a dick cop who grumps on everyone and does nothing beyond the job. And yet, he’s taken under his wing a young woman who others see as a monster. A young woman who everyone who knows the story of their background would think he would have every reason to hate. And you also see him helping this random girl get a memento even though he easily could have ignored it because, ultimately, she had nothing to do with him. There’s also an Empath who’s a pretty good dude who has the biggest crush on him even though their sexual orientations don’t line up. Everyone wonders how this Empath can even like him when he’s such an asshole, but then you have to ask yourself, wouldn’t an Empath of all people know best who to trust and who not? There are scenes with Vikenti, who seems like a super straight and straight-laced dude who doesn’t know how to explore emotions beyond insulting people, where he is the one there who catches someone when they fall, or says just the right thing when it’s needed. Because he’s an asshole, but not an asshole. He cares but just doesn’t care.
So, if you’re bored with parts of your stories or characters, I also really encourage throwing dichotomy and contradictions in there. Take something solid on the story, and then think of something that seems to be at odds with that, and make that be a solid part of it too. Now you have something interesting to explore… how someone or something can be these two seemingly contradictory things in the same form. I find that can help me stay interested, too.
Anyway, I’ve rambled enough and am probably not very helpful, I’m sorry :( I just wanted you to know I totally know what you mean, and precisely because of that, I know without a doubt you can do this. You will finish the story or stories you need to finish. I 100% believe in you, and I hope you can get to a point where you 100% believe in yourself too.
Happy writing, my friend! You are going to finish your stories and they’re going to be fantastic! And if they aren’t fantastic the first draft, that’s the way it is for pretty much everyone - all you have to do is keep working on them until they are. You will absolutely get there, because it’s a journey you already started long ago. You’ve come this far and there’s a lot more waiting for you as you go forward. My writing voice is no better or worse than anyone else’s, it’s just what feels right for me. Your writing voice is yours and therefore inherently lovely. Which means, if you wish you could write like me, you absolutely can: by writing like yourself. I bet you already are, you just can’t see it because of how stressful it can be in the middle of the millionth project feeling like you got nowhere previously. But if you keep going, keep pushing, I know you won’t regret it later, and I know the story you end up finishing will be exactly the story you needed to write at that time, and somewhere out there in this world, someone will be incredibly grateful to you for having written and shared it.
(Oh btw the thing I was talking about is Incarnations - and the first 4 chapters are out free here if you want context on the stuff I mentioned, in case somehow it helps? I really need to edit it… I keep putting it off, but your message is making me want to start it up again, so thank you!
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mini-pretzel · 5 years
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alright dude yea EVERY NUMBER FOR SWEETHEART ASKS
… what have i signed up for?
//cracks knuckles
grab a juice box, grab a snack.
we’ll be here for a while. what have i gotten myself into
1. Talk about your first love. 
oh jesus. i actually recently found my old journal lol
from way back when. 2009 i think? i was 13 or some shit. jesus. ok. so my first love was actually over the internet.
yeah, i know. nowadays we’re spoiled with tinder n shit, but back in 2009, all we had was myspace and msn and i met this fucker on skype.
i was so ahead of my time.
anyway, it was october 25, 2009.
here’s a snippet from my journal entry:
well i met a guy on skype. he’s a month younger cause my b-day is on oct 14 and his is on nov 18. but i don’t mind it.
yoooo i was into younger guys even at 13, jfc hahhaa //kill me jk hmu
and then on the next page hahahhaa omg
december 2, 2009
well me and ___ are no longer together. well we never began. he broke my heart two times already. going in depression. please don’t bother. first love, ha!
omfg damn, two months. yeah, that lasted long. also old me: ur so dramatic lol
also i was a feisty lil fella, jeez.
2. What’s the most beautiful songs you’ve ever heard in your opinion? 
this one
3. How’s your heart feeling right now?
a lil stressed. im like, hoping i can get through all of these questions without my computer crashing. pray 4 me.
4. What kind of self care is your favorite to do? 
ok, first thing to note, i fucking love self care. like, too much if im honest.
baths with bubbles and nice smelling scents, lotions, a face mask, taking my time with washing my face and hair and putting on the cutest clothes after. also snacks, always snacks.
when im feeling like spending money: massage. full body. best thing ever. i treat myself to it at least once a year for my b-day.
5. What’s your skincare routine? 
ok so i just got a new skincare line. it’s from nature republic. i have a cleanser, a toner and a moisturizer. it’s fairly simple (unlike 9 steps in korean ahhahha, but like i’ll probably get there in time) also i have a peel mask that smells like bananas that i put on twice a week to get rid of dead skin cells. oh and sometimes i do korean face masks, too.
6. How did you get to be so beautiful?
answered that q here
7. Do you have any stuffed animals?
NO! //hides them all away
8. Best trip you’ve ever been on?
thailand. my parents took me w/ them on their honeymoon.
lol idek why either. trust me.
i was just there for the swimming, riding elephants, getting food poisoning and downing two banana splits in one afternoon. good times.
9. Favorite thing about your room? 
i live in a jungle. but also in an art gallery cause my mom buys paintings online and resells them, but it’s become such a habit for her they are literally EVERYWHEREE I CANNOT.
also sorry mom i keep forgetting to water the GAZILLION plants THAT YOU HAVE MOVED INTO MY ROOM FOR SOME REASON. they’ll be dead by the time ur home. srry ilyyyyy.
also tae hmu if u want some paintings. i got way too many.
10. Opinion on love? 
dude. idk. i mean. it’s definitely not something one can describe easily or fully grasp.
im still waiting for my big love to come along, so like, we can talk about that when we get there.
otherwise, i’ll say this quote that i heard in a song:
give your heart, but keep your head.
11. Are you affectionate? 
with certain people. im weird.
with some people im like no, don’t touch me pls. i bite and scratch.
and with others you cannot get them out of my death love grip.
12. Who do you look up to? 
i look up to bts a lot. they’re doing a lot of good and they’re very respectable artists.
but i also look up to a lot of writers on here because i want to create worlds and writings like them. i won’t tag them cause rip them trying to find why i tagged them in this long ass post haha.
13. Favorite poet? 
@psycho-slytherin
lol sorry bae
ur gonna have to scroll to find out why i tagged u. and then go red and yell at me. hahah.
i also like silentium! by Fyodor Tyutchev
also everything by pushkin (esp ‘i loved you’ fuck that one gets me every time). seriously. that man isn’t called the golden poet in our country for nothing.
i actually don’t read a lot of poetry nowadays unless its my own or my friends’
but im open to recommendations
14. Song that makes you happy? How about one that calms you down when you’re in a bad place?
answered here!
15. Do you play an instrument?
lol no. i was almost taught the piano (lol rip me, i wanna kill my younger lazy ass self) and i dabbled into learning the violin. but that’s like a whole story and a half hahahaha.
16. Do you do art? Using what (pencil, watercolor, etc)?
i used to pencil draw, nothing special tho. a lot of naked ppl lol. butts n boobs were my fave. also pecks whoo.
17. Do you dance? What style of dance? 
i don’t! but i want to. i’ve been looking into dancing schools. i might do hip hop n stuff. see if i have the rhythm, i can’t tell from just jumping around my room lol
18. What’s your zodiac sign? Do you believe in astrology? 
im a libra yo. diplomatic and indecisive af.
i kinda do? there’s some sense there, but it’s too vague. i think ppl need to look into their charts to really grasp their character.
and for some it may not be true at all, so like. idk. we’re all just doing our best here.
19. Favorite old film? 
a russian film that i always watch over the new year. my mom would always joke that the new year doesn’t start till we watch it lol
the irony of fate
20. What’s your hairstyle? 
idk
u
tell
me
21. What weather is the most beautiful, in your opinion?
cloudy but warm. so there’s not too much sun but u can enjoy a nice walk outside without getting rained on.
22. What upsets you most about the world? 
i only have two hands but there are so many cats and dogs. i cannot pet all of them.
23. Are you in love right now?
answered ;)
24. Do you have a crush? If so, talk about them!
here u go
25. Do you have pets? Talk about something sweet about them! 
i don’t! but i wish i did i would shower them with my love.
but @the-trth-untold dogs are the cutest and @psycho-slytherin cats make my day. pls spam meeeee. also i love @paristae cat too.
26. Do you have a lucky number? 
yup. 22.
27. Have you ever wished on a star? What about on a fallen eyelash? 
i’ve never seen a fallen star, so no.
but i’ve wished on a fallen eyelash, always.
28. Do you believe emoji spells to work? 
emoji spells??
bruh i’ve never even heard of it till this ask wtf is that shit
bruh i mean if it works for ppl all power to them??? idk i never tried it
29. Do you believe in magic in general? 
i believe in magic tricks. but magic died for me when santa stopped existing.
30. What’s the most beautiful thing in life, In your opinion?
here
31. Opinion on the color pink? What about baby blue? 
gorgeous colors. i quite like mauve pink and deep dark blue tho.
but baby blue looks amazing on some folks. oof.
32. What instrumental sound is your favorite? 
piano. always.
33. Do you like the sound of wind? What about the sound of rain? 
answered :)
34. Who makes you happy? 
bts and all of my mutuals
35. What makes you happy? 
sleep, food, music, writing, cuddles. and forehead kisses.
also more listed here
36. Imagine your ideal life, the life you wish to make, what will that look like? 
i live in a nice apartment. doesn’t have to be expensive, just nice and clean with wooden floors and spacious windows.
i have all the necessities that i need and im never lonely.
i have also touched countless hearts by my books and am able to live comfortably just from my works.
haha. you said ideal, right?
also have someone to spend it with. someone i’d write poetry about daily. a bestfriend first and foremost before a lover.
37. Do you wear makeup? If so what’s your favorite type of makeup or specific makeup product? Favorite store to buy makeup?
answered this fella here
38. Do you wear dresses? If so what’s your favorite dress you own? 
i used to have dresses. but not anymore.
i liked the long sleeve sweater black one i had with a low cut. it was gorgeous. i dont have much of boobage but i always felt like i was sexy in it.
39. Ever been heartbroken? How do you deal with it? 
yep. you just kind of take it one day at a time. some days will be better than the last. some days you’ll cry a little harder and some days you move on a little further. it takes time. make sure you have good people around you so you don’t fall into depression.
40. Who’s your closest friend? What do you love about them? 
ah, to be honest i don’t have a closest friend. i’ve always been the kind of person that always had friends around her but never anyone too deep. and i kinda wish i did. i just don’t know who would come to fill that spot. people always leave, so i kind of gave up assigning that spot. i think the people that want to be in that spot will show themselves and tell me. otherwise i will not assume or assign.
41. Introvert or extrovert? 
introvert. but i have my moments. i can be charming and friendly when i want to.
42. Do you like MBTI? What’s your MBTI? 
i had to look it up cause i forgot what it was lol
i took the test a while back: im infp.
there’s not a lot of us, apparently. which is cool. shout out to all infps out there!
43. Would you be a fairy, a mermaid, a vampire, a siren, or an angel? 
hmmm. what kind of fairy tho? lol
maybe vampire? idk i’d be a sexy immortal lady that’d bite innocent boys and girls that just want to have a good time lol
44. What’s the best song a friend has ever introduced to you? 
this oneee
45. Parlez-vous français? 
no~
46. Most beautiful place you’ve been to? 
butchart gardens
47. Where/when do you truly feel at home? 
here
48. Does smiling put you in a better mood? Try it right now, you’re smile is gorgeous! 
kdjfalkfjdlkdsaf //hides
this ask is flirting with me…
well that’s as much action as im going to get this new years eve lol
49. Favorite shoe you own?
my sweet rose gold kicks, yo.
50. Can you walk in stilettos? Do you like them? 
lol no. i cannot. and i do not. im not made for heels. im tall enough as it is.
51. Do you feel loved? 
every time i talk to my mutuals yes //cry
52. How do you express love to those you care about? 
by saying cute words and by clinging to them like a koala.
53. Favorite term(s) of endearment? 
sweetheart, dear, idk im just like anything honestly. love, baby. go crazy.
i also love mean terms like idiot and stuff. or nicknames that hold inside jokes, something between the two of you only.
54. Most romantic thing someone’s ever done for you? 
hasn’t happened yet. so yeah. any takers? lol
55. When is the happiest you’ve ever been? 
reading a good book for the first time. or just experiencing something new that i end up loving for the first time. nothing can replace that first feeling.
56. Are you happy right now? 
happy im almost done hahhahahahaa. ha.
no but srsly i am
57. What makes you smile? 
stupid jokes. puns. someone laughing and showing themselves fully.
58. Do you laugh a lot? 
i mean. i think so? i try. i make jokes a lot and laugh at myself if that counts?
59. What’s your favorite kind of aesthetic? 
ughhhh comfy bf aestheticcc
60. Do you want to marry for love or for some other reason (like money)? 
i have a sour view on marriage. so only if i love someone hard enough. but even then i don’t know if i’ll do it. it hurts too much to think about marriage and wedding rings for me.
61. What would your dream wedding look like? Do you want to get married? 
see above.
62. Favorite flower?
orchid.
63. Favorite artist?
claude monet.
64. Favorite music artist?
bts lol
no surprises there.
65. How kind do you think you are? Is kindness important to you? 
its not something for me to decide. i try to be kind to everyone, but how it is interpreted is different for everyone. i’d like to think i’m kind.
and yes, very important. especially being kind to yourself.
66. Ever made a playlist for someone? 
yes i have. i love making playlists for people. i don’t get asked that enough.
67. Do you have anything you do to physically comfort you when your sad? Such as a favorite blanket? Or a relaxing bath? 
music. music always helps. and tea.
ideally i’d love for someone to massage my scalp, but hahah no one’s been able to do it the right way. when it’s done right i melt and forget about everything.
68. Early bird or night owl? 
night owl.
moonchild, lol
69. Morning routine? 
wake up, look in the mirror, look away from the mirror, go back to bed.
70. Night routine? 
SHOWER N NICE SMELLING LOTIONS. AND SKINCAREEEEEE OOOOF.
also fresh sheets.
71. What is the most lovely quality a person could have in your opinion? 
answered here
72. Do you cry often? Does crying help you get the emotions out? Do you feel better after? 
i only cry when i watch or read something. and it does help. i always feel better after. but i tend to keep my emotions hidden away, the negative ones at least.
73. Do you like hugs? 
i love hugs. come hug me, bro.
u must smell nice tho.
74. When was the last time you kissed someone?
august.
75. Are you small or tall? 
tall. 175cm.
76. Do you like wholesome memes? 
answered
77. Favorite thing about the past? 
cd players. chia pet commercials. flip phones. mom jeans.
78. Do you ever wonder about the future? 
all the time. esp mine. i have no idea what the fuck im doing.
79. Have you ever lived in a different country than you currently live in? 
yep. i’ve lived in america and canada before. and traveled a lot.
80. Do you like plane flights? Airports? 
i don’t mind flying. and depends on the airport. some are better than others.
81. Sunrises or sunsets? 
sunrises. every day is a new day~
82. The beach or a forest? 
bitch- i mean beach. :)
83. What time of day do you tend to be in the best mood? 
any time i am eating. or sleeping. or reading.
im so close to being done omg. this is fun tho.
84. Do you push yourself to act together and in a good mood even when you aren’t? 
always. ain’t nobody gonna deal with that baggage lol
85. Favorite kind of tree? 
japanese maple tree
86. Do you care about the health of the Earth? 
i mean i don’t even care about my health that much tbh, i need to work on that.
87. What did you like most about your childhood, if anything? 
that i got to travel and learned english very young.
88. Do you read a lot? What’s your favorite book? 
answered here
89. What are you most nostalgic for at the moment? 
old school disney
90. What’s your favorite personality trait you have? 
answered this bad boi here
91. List at least ONE thing you love about your appearance. 
eyes. have to work on my ass tho. squats baby.
92. When was the last time you truly felt calm, without much of anything to worry about? 
after a massage.
93. Do you worry a lot? 
eh, i worry enough, i suppose. there’s just some stuff you can’t control.
94. The dazzling lights of the city or the relaxing countryside?
dazzling lights of the city. especially in the evening. and in the winter. ahhhhh. someone hold my hand and walk with meeeeee.
95. Ever changed the shoelaces on one of your shoes? For what reason? 
no i haven’t had that pleasure, lol
maybe next year
96. Favorite pastry? 
BUTTER. CROISSANT.
97. Do you like doing little acts of kindness? 
yes. uwu
98. How’s your day/night going? 
well im finally done with this ask holy shit, and i need to resume writing my namjoon fic so… fantastic. i also have noodles. whoooo.
thank you for reading this whole damn mess of an ask.
ily
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viperbranium · 6 years
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HIIII I am currently following my hero academia but I like pain so was considering starting one piece. Is it good? I'm scared that it's already so long and not sure if the ani is as good as manga or vice versa, although I won't be able to follow manga. Should I? XDDD
Hey nonnie! Sorry for the wait, I couldn’t catch a damn break til now. Okay, so, for the record, I haven’t watched/read my hero academia, so I can’t really draw any comparisons between One Piece and that, and if by “I like pain” you meant you want all the angst, then OP might not really be the greatest option (like, there’s some VERY angsty moments, but overall the show is pretty fun?). If, on the other hand, you meant that as in I KNOW THIS SHOW IS SUPER FUCKING LONG BUT I DON’T CARE BRING IT ON, then, yes, perfect choice! :D
Now, buckle up, cause your questions don’t have an easy answer (except the “is it good?” one, because yes. YES. Yes, it is PRETTY FUCKING GOOD. It is everything), and this is my favorite thing to talk about, so this is going to be rambly and long but also hopefully useful for anyone wondering whether to watch this show or not.
WHY YOU SHOULD WATCH/READ ONE PIECE:
I know, I know. A rubber pirate. A talking reindeer. Merpeople. Ridiculousness. Overall, it wouldn’t seem like this show is really anything but funny and silly, but oH BOY IS IT.
Look, yes. It’s fun. It’s LOTS OF FUN. The show never quite stops having a certain lightheartedness to it, but don’t let that fool you. There’s angst. There’s drama. There’s adventure. There’s friendship.
And there’s also a pretty important message of inclusivity and tolerance throughout the show.
This, initially, seems like just a running theme, but as it turned out, it’s actually the main fucking plot point of the entire show. One Piece is an ode to friendship and freedom and adventure, but it’s also a huge critique against racism and bigotry.
It starts, seemingly, as a kids’ show, and then suddenly it’s all about the one-percenters abusing those beneath them, about a corrupt World Government, about segregation and colonialism and slavery, about blatant erasure of actual history by those in power.
And every single episode it takes to get you there is worth it.
The issue with its length:
First of all, yes. Yes, it’s LONG. It’s pretty fucking long. No two ways about it. But it is absolutely worth it, and I don’t mean this as in “by episode 700 they’ll be tugging at your heartstrings and you’ll be thankful you stuck with it for this long” (although that’s also true), but more like: once you get past the introduction, you’ll be HOOKED, and then you’ll pretty much not give a single fuck that you barely just started it and have fucktons of episodes left to watch.
Getting past the intro is the key thing. It’s not that you have to “get past it” because it’s bad or anything, more like, just like with any other show, you have to give them a chance to set the basis for the plot and introduce you to the cast and all. If you started watching and decided to give it, idk, 5 episodes, you’d probably just quit it thinking it’s too childish and “funny” and not very interesting.
And it is, at first, but it’s like when you go back and read Harry Potter. Compared to the rest of the books, book 1, and possibly book 2 as well, have a much lighter tone and simpler plot. This is partially because those books are working on the foundations for what will later on be the actual PLOT, and after those are over, the rest of the books are less auto-conclusive and a lot more intricate and with more plotlines connecting all the books together and creating a bigger and richer whole story (the other part is the story growing a bit alongside its fanbase, which is honestly a wonderful thing).
So essentially, the beginning of One Piece is like books 1 and 2 in the Harry Potter saga. And because it’s such a long show (as I type this, we’re on episode 839), that means a few tenths of episodes. If you’ve watched some of those as a younger kid on TV, then chances are you’ll get past them a lot more easily, because they are fun and nostalgia plays an important part, but if you haven’t, I do get why it can be a bit discouraging (but again, IT’S SO WORTH IT. PINKY PROMISE).
A quick non-spoilery rundown of that first intro part would be:
Episodes 1 to 62: the first crew members meeting each other. These are a few short arcs, all following the same pattern: Captain Luffy gets to an island, finds someone he wants in his crew, they defeat some minor bad guy, person ends up joining Luffy, and they move onto the next island. Even then, they are quite funny, and you inadvertently start hearing stuff mentioned that’s actually SUPER RELEVANT in the context of the grand scheme of things. Also, a bunch of those are filler episodes that you can outright skip, so it’s not THAT MANY EPISODES, and I’d argue that around episode ~30 or so, the whole thing gets a bit more intense too. [MORE ON FILLER EPISODES IN A MINUTE]
On episode 62 they officially get started on their trip for good, and the whole show starts being a bit less childish (not to say the tone changes entirely, it pretty much remains a funny yet exciting story throughout the whole thing, mostly due to the main character’s personality, but still, you can SEE that there’s STUFF GOING ON IN THIS WORLD). From here to episode 92 we’re setting the basis for a pretty big arc:
—> Turning the intensity up a few notches!
Episode 92 to 130: The Alabasta Arc – politics! Intrigue! A big fucking and fascinating villain! This arc is AMAZING.(then we have a bunch of filler episodes, again, totally skippable, and then…)
Episode 144 to 195: The Skypiea Arc – another great one, even touching on some pretty fucking important themes like colonialism and land-theft.
—> Turning the intensity up some more notches!!!
And from post-Skypiea onwards, the show is pretty much AAAAAAAAAASLGHSFLKHHLFGKJLK! nonstop.
(btw, if you ARE interested in watching, just let me know and I’ll compile a quick list like this one for you, letting you know which episodes you can skip and what the best way to watch it would be ^^)
Reading the manga vs Watching the anime:
The One Piece anime pretty much 100% follows the manga, so you can go with whatever option works best for you.
Fights and all are generally a lot more fun to watch than to read, plus one episode covers more than one manga chapter, so my advice usually is: watch the anime til you’re all caught up, and then switch to the manga so you can read everything that hasn’t happened in the anime yet and you won’t get spoiled, and then you can read the manga weekly when it comes out (and continue watching the anime as well, or not).
Because the anime follows the manga to a T, there needs to be filler arcs, since there’s some weeks when the manga takes a break, and also like I said, one episode covers a bit more than one chapter. Without filler arcs, the anime would catch up to the manga pretty quick and then they’d have to start making up stuff, or dividing the show into seasons, and either of those options would be sucky.
So, while it’s a necessity, it’s NOWHERE near as bad as the amount of filler there was in shows like Bleach or Naruto, and some of those arcs are even quite good? (The post-Skypiea filler arc f.e., G-8, is hilarious and super entertaining!). Personally I’d watch everything at least once, for the jokes and the interactions between crew members if nothing else, but you won’t be missing a single thing if you outright skip all of those.
(there’s also an odd episode every now and then that’s not exactly part of any filler arc, but quite literally an AU where the characters all live in a village instead of being pirates. You get one episode like this every once in a while – I think there’s been like, 5 in total? Maybe? –, as well as a few other weird things like a crossover with Dragon Ball or idek. Those I’d just skip entirely – they’re not remotely as fun as “one piece au” makes it sound lmao –, but luckily they aren’t a lot. Just one here and there).
Sooooo I hope all this answers your questions, nonnie, and that it helps you decide whether to give the show a shot or not. 
TL;DR: yes, it’s long, but it’s fucking worth it, and you can either read it or watch it because the anime follows the manga 100% accurately.
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Hey, so, I guess this is considered late to add here already and is probably a pretty risky choice, but I’m the owner of the art shop who doesn’t draw LGBT+ shippings. I don’t have a Tumblr but I guess I can post anyways? Not quite sure how this works I’ve never actually been here before. But anyways, idk how best to start this. I’ve edited a message in my art shop which I guess I’ll just copy+paste here n edit out irrelevant stuff (as in would only really be relevant if I haven’t already mentioned the situation): “I wish to clarify that I do not hold anything against the LGBT+ community nor do I wish them any harm, and I do not see any kind of LGBT+ romance as sexual when it wouldn’t be if it were a straight couple as I’ve heard people implied. I don’t care if you’re gay or trans, heck, I don’t even care if you’re gay and married, I simply don’t agree with it as it goes against my personal beliefs, much in the same way as I do not agree with atheism. I do not refuse orders from those from LGBT+ and I’m not scared to talk to, be friends with (I already am in fact and I legit don’t care), or order service from them, in other words I don’t treat them or think of them any differently except in the direct aspect of those beliefs. I sincerely apologize for any misunderstanding or offense/harm from this refusal to affiliate. I never intended any harm in refusal to draw LGBT+ content (and again, I will still draw characters who are (and in addition although I don’t think I explicitly stated this I WILL draw LGBT+ characters doing things like holding hands or hugging as long as it is not clearly romantic in manner). I don’t see those of LGBT+ as any less human than anyone else and I really hope you don’t think I do. I also don’t hold anything against whoever shared my art shop in this way or whoever contributed to their argument, although I do wish they had found a respectful way to take their problems with my shop up with me privately. I don’t want to harm anyone, if I do I really want to know what I could fix or do better, I know I’m human like everyone else and I’m willing to hear if someone thinks I’ve made a mistake as long as they present it in a respectful manner. I’ve also edited my statement that I won’t draw LGBT+ in hopes to make it clearer I hold no ill will towards them. Again, I apologize for any misunderstandings or harm that’s come from it. I realize now that I should’ve been clearer as this can be a sensitive topic.
I noticed one issue I’d really like to address, the story about me commissioning someone and “deleting all traces of their art from my account as well as flipping out” upon learning they were gay/trans is NOT true in ANY way. They’ve provided not a shred of proof and I’m honestly pretty shocked that people would believe them. The closest I’ve come to deleting any trace of art is when I completely cleared my dragons’ bios in preparation for a change of plans with them (which I never got around to), but my posts asking/thanking people for the art are all still there and I’ve saved all of the art I received.”
So on actually being here there are a few more things I’d like to address that I didn’t want to make the focus of my art shop (I don’t even want to leave that message there forever but idek when I can). There were a lot of assumptions that both op and others made that I’d like to clarify on…
When they said I “don’t believe in gay marriage”, they were using arguments of others who don’t agree with gay marriage. I don’t share these beliefs nor have I ever said so.
About the whole gore vs nsfw vs LGBT+ n light romance stuff thing. Gore has never really bothered me. It’s just always been that way. Idk why or whatever but it’s just normal to me that I wouldn’t be bothered by it, I honestly don’t quite get why people are making such a fuss about just gore in general when it has nothing to do with LGBT+. That they said I’d be willing to draw gore that breaks the rules of FR is also an assumption. I took it that people would get that I respect the rules of FR in putting my basic “anything against its rules” thing, and thus get where the boundaries are. If those rules weren’t in place sure I would draw those things on there but I respect the staff and their decisions. I don’t like things that are too sexual in manner. That’s kind of another “just always been that way” thing. Some people hate gore and are completely fine with sexual content, some people are vice versa, and some either hate or are fine with both. And it’s not strange that they would, those are two entirely different things. LGBT+ and nsfw are also two entirely different things to me, hence my putting them in two different rules. I didn’t mean for them to correlate in any way and I’m sorry for the misunderstandings in that area. With the general romance, this is because of my personal beliefs. I’m fine with people holding hands or hugging or other things like that, but as I don’t agree with LGBT+ I would prefer not to draw ship art of that content. And I place stress on the word content because I think this is where most of the misunderstandings come from. I don’t hold a single thing against LGBT+, I see them as equals like I see atheists as equals (as I’ve made the comparison, I know they are different things but I’m just trying to make it clearer how I see this subject since it can be very sensitive and it’s where assumptions and all that eventually come natural after seeing so much of it).
Since I’ve also seen some saying things about their rights and all, I’d like to add that I actually don’t think gay marriage should be illegal, since that’s usually where those kinds of words are based on. I don’t think laws should be based simply on things of that sort that I disagree on.
And I’d like to brush over this again since I was genuinely shocked to see this. I have never, ever said anything derogatory to anyone I’ve ever commissioned, especially not on the grounds that they were a part of LGBT+. I don’t even have any idea if anyone I’ve commissioned even was a part of the LGBT+ community and I don’t care. I’d like to remind everyone that they have no evidence whatsoever for their claim. I’m willing to work with anyone if they think of how I can show proof of otherwise, but really if there wasn’t anything that happened I don’t know where to start myself since it wouldn’t leave anything. And lastly, you might be better off pming me if you want a reply, like I said I don’t have a Tumblr and I don’t really know how this site works so idk if I can reply to anything else. My username’s already been dropped, I’ve already received a few (thankfully polite and even supportive) messages. The op shared a considerable chunk of what I’ve said (it may have not seemed like much but all you need is a few sentences, sometimes even just one), given away the site and even the topic of my post, and initials for my username. I never really had much of a chance to stay anonymous with all of that so I wouldn’t be surprised with getting more. Again, I don’t hold anything against anyone here. I’m honestly just scared. I’m not trying to guilt trip anyone but I really am scared because I don’t want to be remembered like this and I don’t want to lose people I might’ve even been friends with if it weren’t for difference of beliefs, I don’t want people to hate me or be mad at me. That’s not something I want to cause and I’m really sorry I did.
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How Do We Fall in Love?
Pairing: SherlockxReader/MoriartyxReader (Idek, man.)
Warnings: Mentions of sex, gun threats, mentions of criminal past (it is the Sherlock fandom, this should be no surprise). Maybe light cursing, I don't remember.
A/N: I AM SO SORRY MY LOVELIES. I've been SUPER busy, and just haven't had time to post anything. I am so so so sorry.
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Sherlock's heart sped so fast, he could hear the fear coursing through his veins. A screeching so loud, he swore everyone within a four kilometer radius could hear. The words repeated over and over, what appeared to be a simple little comment on his blog became an omen of everything that could've possibly gone wrong.
Lovely girl you've got, But can she stand her own flames? Fires can be very dangerous... ~JMx
He'd replied eight times over, attempting to get more clues. His head was spinning, trying to solve the clue at the bottom of the recent picture of you and him. Something John had posted on Sherlock's blog in his place, and it may've given you you away to Moriarty. The name sent chills down his spine. What used to be a fun challenge had turned into his own personal hell.
And now the devil had the woman who mattered most to him, and all the clues in the world couldn't help him, because his mind refused to process. John, Mycroft, Lestrade- everyone was trying to help, but to no true avail. Moriarty still had you...
Then a call came in- no, less of a call, more of a clue, one so simple, even George could figure it out. But before anyone else could evaluate it, Sherlock had sneaked off, hurrying to the same place he'd faced the Black Lotus General- only to be met with another clue, this time leading to an abandoned flat on the outskirts of London. He huffed as he climbed the stairs, feeling like his lungs may burst at any moment from the over use, but he could still see the image of your glittering eyes burned into his mind.
----
Jim tilted your head towards him as you both waited, away from the window that you could see your "knight in shining armor" come to "rescue you". His thumb grazed along your jaw, lifting until his eyes burned into yours.
"Problem, my little desert rose?" He purred, eyes dead save for a twinkle of insanity, and a smirk so dangerous it could kill you without a touch.
"None, sir." You answered appropriately, but the way he grabbed your wrist immediately told you that your little lie hadn't gone unnoticed. Your eyes snapped shut at the immediate, but bearable pain. Despite his cold exterior, you both knew Jim would never actually hurt you, but his threats were never to be taken lightly.
Just because he wouldn't hurt you, didn't mean he would have any problem leaving you for the dogs...
"I just- is it necessary that I be here, sir?" You kept it polite as possible, allowing your eyes to open again, being met with a quizzical stare. That's right, you thought, he doesn't understand complex emotions... You stared back, trying to hide what you could behind a blank mask. From this short distance, you could feel his breath fanning over your lips, like it'd done many times before. Though, usually, it came with a sleepless night, and marks left for the next day, claiming what was his.
"Remind me, pet," Great, now he was upset, "Why're we here?" He took a step forward despite there being no room, forcing you to move back, and repeatedly did so, until your back hit the wall of your old flat.
"To bring down Sherlock Holmes." You muttered shakily, feeling very contrasting emotions from his close proximity, the combination making you dizzy and nauseous. Your hand hit the wall with a gathered force of his anger and something underlying that wasn't quite as clear.
"Now, wouldn't we want him to see his little sweet, sweet love betraying him, pet?" He hissed out each word, face inches from yours as his plan ricocheted in your head.
"I put you onto the playing field to make Sherlock Holmes fall for the girl of his dreams- not the other way around." Your breath hitched in your throat, head shaking as much as possible. You didn't know what you felt for Sherlock, or perhaps it was simply nothing, and you just felt the need to protect the one person who'd ever cared for you- but you definitely would overlook it for your life.
"It's not like that- Jim, you know me, and it's not like that. I know the plan, and-" He already seemed to be calming some, though his eyes still showed rage inside, "I would never betray you like that." Sadly, it was true. Jim had protected you when you made the biggest mistake of your life- from both the government and any criminal organizations out to kill you. Six years, and he'd given you everything you could ever need, at the simple cost of working for him. He never had you do much, and never pushed you into anything you were uncomfortable with, and hey- the door was always open, if you'd ever do choose death over him.
But that's the thing about Jim Moriarty. He is death, in his own sense, just in much prettier packaging. He twists your mind, until nothing exists but him, and he always gets what he wants, and always makes it seem like that's what you wanted, all along. And you'd caught on to the game early on- never cared to stop it, but then again, if you did, then you'd be boring like everyone else.
He smirked the slightest bit, fingers brushing against your cheek like rose petals in the wind, "Oh, my little desert blossom..." he leaned closer like he would kiss you, "I'll believe it when I see it. Choose Holmes, and you've only got yourself to blame for your untimely demise." He said it the same way he would words of endearment, the sickly feeling seeping into you, but his tone drawing you closer.
"You're a double edged sword, you know that?" You muttered, somewhat wishing you could betray James- even the slightest bit. You couldn't care less about your protection. It's just that your sense of loyalty rested with the consulting criminal, and you could never give that up. His lips brushed against yours just as the door opened downstairs, and you fought down the temptation to tell Sherlock to just stay put.
But as Jim's lips fully encased yours, not a sound left your mouth. Footsteps echoed up the stairs, and still, you were engulfed by the madman. Infatuated.
The door to the old flat building was kicked open, the ancient lock flying off the door. You heard the gun before you saw it..
Click, "Let. Her. Go." He demanded, as if you hadn't just been kissing the criminal a second ago. Your eyes went wide as Jim pulled away, smirking with a demented glint in his eyes. The same one that sliced down into your very core, ripping anyone in its path to shreds.
"Oh, Sherlock... tsk... tsk... tsk..." The gun stayed trained on Jim, and every second ticked down, ringing in your ears. You looked between the two, staying next to the wall, unsure if you were even allowed to say anything, or if it'd mess up Jim's plan. Jim circled around Sherlock, the gun lowering slightly the moment he was away from you. Soon he was in front of you, again, eyes lit up with knowing that Sherlock was absolutely clueless. Jim held his hand out to you, more of an offering than a demand. Cocky bastard. He knew you'd choose him.
"Let's let our fair blossom decide, hm?" You wished you could say you even considered choosing Sherlock for a split second, but then again, that'd be pointless. The moment you left Jim's side, you'd be dead... Your hand reached out for Jim's, not a hesitation in the motion.
"Y/n, I know who you are." Sherlock said flatly, your head snapping to him, hand drawing back. Jim's eyes went black at the reaction, oh so tempted to just snatch your hand.
"I can help you- protect you. You don't need him!" Sherlock insisted, stepping closer, and offering out his hand. His eyes sparkled with desperation, genuinely wanting you to come with him. He didn't want to beat Moriarty, or use you for his own agendas. He just wanted to protect you... and that was enough. Your hand shook, uncertainty spreading through you. You had never left Jim's side- never questioned him. You'd let him use you until you ran dry, because... that's all you'd ever known. But here was Sherlock... and he genuinely cared for you..
Could he protect you? Could he, really?
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thegangismyfamily · 7 years
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Love Me Senseless | One-Shot for Alli
Haiii 1. I was wondering if you got my Ship? I didn’t see it =P  Andddd 2. I was wondering if you can make a imagine with me x Ponyboy or Johnny about a fight and makeup please. ♥️♥️ I love your work  I have long brown hair with Hazel eyes that change from blue to green and when I’m sad or mad a light or dark grey, I’m 5'2" I wear glasses (sometimes) and I can be bubbly but once you get on my nerves I can be sarcastic or cold, And I don’t intentionally mean too 🌸
{Requested by the sweet cinnamon bun @iam-allikat }
A/N: Awww thank you, you’re honestly such an adorable sweetheart I die. and I apologize for how long it took me too write this, it’s actually shameful. I hope you like this and I apologize in advance if this isn’t what you had in mind. <3 also I know I shipped you with Johnny when you sent your ship request, but I hope you don’t mind me switching to Ponyboy. I’m curious to see how you two would turn out, and also I just don’t see Johnny arguing with you. but I’ll be posting a fight and make up preference soon. also this story really brought me out of my funk so yeah thanks :)) and I’m sorry this is so long, idek what happened.
Warning(s): A little angsty, reallllly long, like longer than I even meant for it to be, floaty fluff at the end, and that’s about it tbh :)
You bound up the stairs to your boyfriend’s house before knocking on the door. You know you didn’t have to, after all the Curtis household never locks their door, but you just never felt comfortable roaming around their house without being let in first.
Pony hated when you knocked. “You’re family. You’re my girlfriend so you’re family, you don’t have to knock. Just come in, eat our food, sleep on the couch, we don’t care.” That’s what he had said when you expressed your nervousness about invading their home. Back then he’d actually cared enough to bother having a conversation with you.
You grin as Soda opens the screen door and rolls his eyes playfully at you. Soda was sweet. From the moment you had met him, he was sweet. You had been around during the nasty break up with Sandy, and it honestly brought you two closer. You had dealt with your close girl friends going through rough break ups and you gave Soda the same treatment. You and Soda had spent countless nights together, just staying up and letting him vent while eating the last of the ice cream on top of the kitchen counters. You let him cry and helped him pick up the pieces of himself to get him back on his feet. It was a dark time for him, but if it had not been for it, you two wouldn’t be basically the best of friends as you are now. 
“Alli,” Two-Bit shouts from across the room. You wave at him before noticing the childish Mickey Mouse ears on top of his head. You greet the other boys who were sprawled throughout the living room.
“Hey kiddo,” Darry greets you as he rushes past you and into the kitchen. He usually came home during his lunch breaks when he could manage, but it seemed like today he was running particularly late today. You frown as you look around the living room and fail to find your boyfriend’s pale skin and mocha eyes.
“Move, creep,” Dallas jokes as he brushes past your shoulder as he exits the kitchen. He plops himself on the couch next to Johnny and cracks open his coke. You roll your eyes and smile at him and he nods his acknowledgement at you. You hold his eye until he points in the direction of Ponyboy’s bedroom. You loved your unspoken conversations with Dallas, Pony thought it was weird. But when you’ve known someone as long as you’ve known Dallas, a lot of things stop being weird to you two.
You turn and make your way down the hall. When you reached his door, you took a deep breath before turning the door knob. It didn’t budge. You twisted it a couple more times, thinking the door was jammed, but it was clear that the door was just locked. You sighed out of your nose heavily before knocking on the door. It wasn’t like he didn’t know you were coming, hell he told you yesterday to come over! You waited a few moments for Pony to unlock the door, when you found yourself still standing at the locked door you knocked again, harder. The hear shuffling behind the door before the sound of the door unlocking sounds through the narrow hallway.
Pony swings open the door to find you standing there impatiently with your arms crossed. He rolled his eyes at your expectant glare before turning around and launching himself back onto his bed. You walk into his uncharacteristically dirty room and close the door behind you. He rolls onto his back and throws an arms cross his face. You clear your throat to get his attention. He doesn’t look at you.
“Um Pony,” you say tentatively breaking the silence. He lets his arm drop down to his chest and he rolls his head in your direction to look at you. He has dark bags under his eyes that were never there before. He looks at you with the same warm brown eyes that captivated you the first time you met him. You lose your train of thought for a second. His hair is messy though, and he looks tired, like he’s aged 10 years since the last time you saw him.
“If you’re just here to stare at me-,” he starts. He trails off and doesn’t finish his sentence by the embarrassment of being called out for your prolonged staring caused your cheeks to flare pink. You shake your head and pull yourself together.
“Oh, no, um I’m here for our date,” you say sheepishly. Pony stares at you confused and your heart drops. Typical. “And you don’t remember, okay, great. Well jerk, you told me we were going out to the park yesterday,” you cross your arms and stare blankly at him. Realization strikes his face, and you are not amused.
“Right, right, right. No, um yeah can we reschedule,” he asks, throwing his arm over his eyes again.
“No,” you state simply. He throws his arm down beside him and stares at the ceiling, clearly annoyed.
“What do you mean, ‘no’,” he asks incredulously.
“That’s a stupid question. No means no. No means get your ass up, because we’re going out. I thought that was fairly clear,” you say sarcastically.
“I don’t want to go out with you,” he says, “right now.” His cheeks redden and you both feel the air tighten with tension as he tries to save himself.  
“Do you mean in general, or you just right now, right now,” you ask. The air is cold and thick and you hate it. It never used to be like that with him.
“It’s not me who acts like they want to break up,” he mutters. You stare at him. Is he serious? Is he being genuinely serious right now?
“I’m the one acting like I want us to break up,” you ask. You’re shocked, like authentically shocked. He scoffs at you, and you’ve just about had it.
“Oh my gosh, you’re delusional. You’ve lost it. Clearly you have, because it wasn’t me, whose been ignoring you for the past 2 weeks, Pony,” you spat. You were mad, you were absolutely livid.
“Yes because why would I talk to the girl who doesn’t even care for me,” he counters. You’re eyes widden in disbelief
“You stopped caring about me Ponyboy! I talk to you? Nothing. I try to give you a kiss? Nothing. I plan a whole god damn date night, and you don’t even show up!” You were yelling now, but this was a yelling matter. He sits up in his bed and swings his legs over the side.
“I meant to call,” he mumbles. You throw your hands up in the air.
“That’s not the point! I sat there for hours, waiting for you. Through all of this I’ve just been waiting for you to come out of this funk, to help me out in the two person relationship. But you just don’t care,” you argue. At this point, tears have started pricking your eyes and your cheeks burn with anger.
“I wasn’t the one who gave up! You did! You used to have so much fire in you, you’d snap at me for little things and I loved it. I loved that you had so much fierceness in you. Now you don’t even make the effort to scold me. I wouldn’t be surprised if you casually walked out of here if you found me with another girl.” You glare at him.
“Do you want to be with another girl?”
“I never said tha-. You’re missing the point.” He’s standing now, and his face is angry, but his eyes are sad.
“Then why even go through the trouble of bringing a ‘hypothetical’ girl into thi-”
“Look, all I’m just saying, if you don’t want to be with me, if that fire and passion is gone, then end it now. I love you, god I love you, but I don’t want you to feel forced to love me or be with me.” His face and eyes both match now, they both hold desperation, but you draw it out a little more, after all this is the most he’s spoken to you in weeks.
“Then why not talk to me? Why would you just cut me out like that? If there’s a problem, you tell me, and we work it out. Not you ignore me weeks and assume I know what you’re mad about,” you say.
“What about you? You let this go on for weeks. You obviously knew something was wrong, why not confront me earlier,” he attempts to counter. It’s a weak argument, and he knows it.
“Oh, okay,” you sarcastically mock him. You roll your eyes and you can see the anger flare up in Pony’s eyes. You lazily pick at your nails and ignore him as he rants at you.
“Alli,” he exclaims. You look up at him bored and you have to bite back a laugh as he grinds his teeth. Yes! This is what you were looking for! Passion, emotion, anything besides his god damn silence.
You pull out the rolling chair from his desk, and sit in it. His face is red as he rants and you feel the tension release from your shoulders. The problem isn’t resolved, but to know that this isn’t the end of you two, that he still loves you, is relieving. You sigh contently and lean your head back, letting your eyes slip shut. He stops mid sentence, seeing your position and stares at you curiously. You let out a laugh at the sudden silence and a breeze flows through the air and the papers scattered around Pony’s room rustle and floats the papers around. Ponyboy shudders at the sound of you laugh, god he missed the sound of it, he missed you. He sits on his bed and stares at you.
“I missed you,” he says. You smile and tears prick your eyes. You raise your head and look at him.
“I missed you too.”
“I never stopped loving you, I want you to know that,” he mumbles. His eyes are still on you. You look like a dream, like if he blinks you’ll float away. 
“I didn’t stop arguing because I didn’t care. I stopped arguing because we’ve been together so long, that nagging can become tiring. Me not arguing with you doesn’t mean I don’t love you, it means I love you enough to overlook the annoying, stupid things you do that drive me up the walls and not mention every chance I get,” you explain. He stands up from the bed and walks towards you before plopping himself on the floor. He takes your hands in his and rubs his thumb across your knuckles. You shiver at his touch. God how you’ve missed him.
“I love you,” he mutters as he pulls your laced hands to his lips and kisses them.
“I like you too,” you retaliate. He laughs, and you smile, and your heart feels light again.
“I like you too,” he repeats.
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eternaldipshit · 4 years
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okay so
i have no idea who will want to read my unbeta’d spite-fueled cathartic garbage heap of a post-sburb fic focusing heavily on the striders but it is past fucking 40k and if i don’t share it with someone soon i’m going to explode bc i crave validation like a pregnant woman craves pickles and peanut butter 
i’m also not sure about my formatting yet. i wish i could art even the slightest bit to make it more mspa-like but alas, i am confined to the written word, which is only slightly above the skill level of my drawing prowess. 
idek if i’ll ever even finish this fucking eldritch monstrosity clusterfuck. i just started writing it bc i was so wholly unsatisfied with the ending of homestuck and then so fucking pissed at the epilogues and god dammit i just want everyone to be happy fuck you fuck this fuck me
so then this shit happened and i don’t even have anyone to share it with despite the fact that i have davevoice down to a motherfucking science and i just want someone to appreciate that and all my self-indulgent striderbonding bullshit okay god dammit
you will pry dirk and dave grocery shopping together from my cold dead gnarled grasp do you fucking hear me 
basically this entire fic is just a self-indulgent trash heap of truly unprecedented proportions and i have absolutely no regrets (aside from my inability to make anything brief ever and it is so long already and nothing has happened but god dammit that’s pretty much homestuck anyway and like i said this shit is entirely self-indulgent and if i want to write pointless pesterchum logs that don’t even further the plot then no one is damn well going to STOP ME) 
this was also inspired by so it goes by TGP bc god bless that fucking fic
i’m not going to spoil anything and ffs i don’t even really have a title yet but i guess i can say a kinda synopsis? it’s like a post-sburb strider-focused fluffy yet also angsty af alt ending that is totally hedonistic on my part
idk i just want everyone to be happy gdi so if you like post-sburb au fluffy bullshit that’s more of a strider character study than anything else then you’ll probably like this fic? maybe???
i don’t REALLY have pairings planned yet besides one, and that one isn’t going to come to fruition unless i plan on REALLY getting into this. we’ll fucking see. 
and i have some trigger warnings: ptsd, panic attacks, anxiety, depression, internalized homophobia(ish), and i will update this as necessary but i think that’s all for now? if there are more just message me and i’ll add them and apologize profusely and I KNOW i said this was going to be happy but it’s also meant to be a cathartic release for my own copious gross homestuck feels and a lot of them entail making sure the striders are happy and healthy and lbr those boys are fucked up psychologically but this fic is them like... working through those issues rather than them being sort of glossed over in canon (either them going unaddressed or being addressed off-screen) and don’t even TALK to me about epilogue dirk or i will explode into a spontaneous ball of ragefire and consume everything in my wrathful bitter hateflames 
i’m only going to be tagging the first post i do with ‘homestuck’ bc i don’t want to flood the tags with my bullshit so i doubt anyone will even pick up on this nonsense no matter how much i post AND this will be the one and only author’s note that is going to be attached to this story unless i ever finish it which will probably never happen bc i am a flighty shitlord who sucks at writing. i might post random interjections between one post and the next bc as you may have already gleaned i have a physical incapability of closing my goddamn mouth and if you’ve read all this i’m both proud and scared unless you’re my beautiful wife in which case i’m sorry 
and now i guess... i’m done????? ranting??????? uh idk how to wrap this up so here you go i guess enjoy??? fuck
Tick.
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succinct-assbutt · 7 years
Text
Enlighten Me
Pairing: Quicksilver x Reader
Wordcount: 1300
Warnings: possible swearing idek
A/N: It’s been a while since I posted some Peter so here y’all go lol
                                                   ~*~*~
January 11th, Lisbon, Portugal; Hot, arid summer and the smell of ginger and cloves; swimming in the sea and Latin letters drawn in the sand…the prickle of sun on bronzed skin and wind licking up your heels as you run…bright lights and languid nights spent trawling the streets of the city for an adventure you’d never find back home. Lisbon Portugal, and Y/N had never been this happy.
Not in a while, no...Everything seemed to come so much easier that month. Happiness, peace of mind, love (their bank accounts were filling up nicely, too). January, she remembered. Thirty one days of hedonistic pursuit, of travelling the world in search of a part of her that had seemingly been lost in all the late nights spent at the office and a hefty breakup that left her in pieces for two weeks. January. Hers. Forever.
Sitting on a pile of sand a few feet away from the ocean, Y/N watched the water crash onto land, push and pull and call for her to dive in. Hungry to swallow her. Greedy. She had already spent the entire day feeding the waters, but now she was tired, worn out, and all she wanted to do was watch. Her eyes followed the tide coming in. It breached into the sand, foamy edges that would retract but a few seconds later. The ocean was beautiful, that much she knew. Everything was beautiful, she’d found, if you looked hard enough. All it took was a keen eye; a keen eye most people didn’t have.
Up until a few months ago, she’d been blind like most people, too. Ignorant of what the wind whispered when it blew harshly through the streets, of what the birds’ songs meant, of what was written in the stars on a late, lonely night. Up until a few months ago, Y/N recalled, she’d been just as sightless as the rest of the world. Fresh out of college and working as an intern at a design company, driven by desire to someday be the head of the franchise. Hah—dreams of a little girl who refused to grow up. Looking back now, it was obvious. She should have seen it, her downfall, only she hadn’t.
Cut to now, with her newborn gift of sight, she’d be able to tell events before they happened, be able to prevent the heartache she’d experience back then.
At that moment a keen wind picked up as the waters gurgled, when a voice suddenly cut through her reverie.
“You alright?”
Y/N’s head whipped in the direction of the sound.
Peter.
Smiling at her unsurely, still shirtless and dusted with sand as he slowly approached her. Y/N smiled softly when she saw him jogging over.
“You look…sad.” He said as he sat down next to her. He was panting heavily, still a bit wet, a bit too-himself from the way his eyes glinted violently. His deep brown gaze darted over her face, searching. Silver hair hung around his face like a curtain, little strands poking out from behind his ears, tickling the tip of his nose.
Grey hair, a sign of wisdom. A testament to the world of his astuteness, hidden beneath a comical demeanor and stubbornness (God help them, he was stubborn) that she could see through. Peter Maximoff, a mutant, a friend to most. Recollection of how they’d met was a tangled mess of memories her life between college and working at the company; days spent in the school of the gifted—all fleeting memories, all barely decipherable.
Gaze trained on his, Y/N shook her head. “I’m fine.”
“You don’t look it.” Peter leaned back in the sand with his hands propped under his head. “You look like you’re thinking, and what did I tell you about that? Brings a whole lotta bad.”
Y/N laughed then shook her head. “What are you, Aristotle? No, I’m just…I’m thinking about good stuff this time.”
This time.
“Like…?”
A silence. He was watching her, jovial eyes turned somber and waiting for a response.
She took in a deep breath, then…
“I look around me and I see….everything I never thought I would. I see the ocean, the sand—I feel it. I’ve been to more countries than I ever thought I’d go to and I’ve lived. Really lived…”
She turned to look at Peter, fondness swimming in her eyes.
“….all with you…because of you.”
“You give me too much credit.”
“You just don’t give yourself enough.”
“Maybe. Does it matter? I like to think that that’s something insignificant.”
Smiling, Y/N shook her head slowly, gaze never faltering. A swell of warmth flourished in her chest. Through her coursed cocktail of emotions she tried to grasp—happiness? Contentment? Love?—Maybe all of them. She couldn’t decipher it. She didn’t want to.
All she wanted was Peter, her Peter, who had opened her eyes all those months ago.
She shifted closer to him, straddling his lap and leaning down with their faces inches apart. Her hair fell like a curtain around them, shutting out the world, the greedy ocean lapping at the shore…Him. Peter….if it hadn’t been for him then January would have never been as memorable.
With a smile, the grey-haired boy chuckled and his hands found her waist. Y/N licked her lips. Leaned in closer. His fingers drew little symbols on her skin as he spoke.
“Peter…” She said, her hand gently cupping his face. “…Sweet, sweet Peter. Mine.”
“Yours.”
“Always?” She asked.
He nodded wordlessly.
Waves rushed onto the shore and drew back. The sky melted into a stretch of navy blue as the sun set, laced with purple and streams of faded clouds. In her chest Y/N felt it happen, the awakening, the final step to enlightenment—him. Here. With her. On a beach far, far away from both their past lives, tangled up with each other in a moment she wished she could freeze for future days.
Trailing nimble fingers along his cheek, her eyes bore into Peter’s. Y/N spoke softly.
“How long has it been since we left? It feels like ages.”
“Longer, probably. Who cares? Part of the fun of this journey is the moving ahead and never looking back. Don’t look back now.”
“I’m only asking.”
“Don’t.” He took her hands and laced them with his, holding them up on either side of her head. She smiled. Wide. God, she looked like an Angel hovering above him, cherubic features peering down at him. Beneath her. He was beneath her in every sense of the word; he wasn’t as perfect, he’d never be. Maybe that’s what made them so fit for each other.
“You know,” Peter started, drawing her hands closer in and then out. “I’m the fastest man alive…I can run around this entire country in less than three minutes. I can run to Egypt and back within the same hour and yet, whenever I’m around you,…I manage to feel like the whole world has slowed down just for us. Stuck in time. Huh, maybe we are.”
“Maybe you’re just moving so fast it feels so? Sound barrier and all that.”
“Now look who sounds like Aristotle...”
She laughed and nuzzled her nose into his neck. Felt the rumble of his chuckle. Relished it.
Snaking his arms around her waist, he pulled her in closer, trapped against him. Caged in his arms. His. He peered down at her from the slope of his nose. And maybe she didn’t mind being here, being so far away from home. And maybe Peter had become her new home, one she moved with from the East to Asia to the ends of the earth. With him everything felt harmonized and poised. In place. Always. Every moment with him was January, thirty one days of delectation fitted into a second and oh, wasn’t it sweet...
And as they lay on that beach, mouths lazily moving against each other, Y/N knew: she would never be blind again.
                                                  ~*~*~
I’m sorry if this is trash it was just sitting in my computer and I decided to upload it, but if you did like it, go ahead and like/reblog or follow to keep updated when I post more oneshots.
Thank you for reading!
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jngukie · 7 years
Text
WIP Tag
i was tagged by @floofyeol! idk if this is a blessing or a curse let’s find out.
some of these fics have been in drafts for ages? so tbh i don’t even know if i will post them but hey we’ll see. (so assume for now that none of these will be posted—except when stated otherwise with an *)
the first couple will be ships. the later ones are reader-inserts. all are still protected by the Creative Commons license.
slide it up in here: chapter 10* pairing(s): jikook, namjin, yoonseok genre: humour, crack, drama, angst tags/warnings: texting, college au, slightly filthy, innuendoes, Awkward Jeon Jungkook™, slowburn, self-esteem issues, self-hatred, implied/referenced homophobia, everyone is a mess™
SUMMARY
gguki: [image attached] gguki: what should i do with it chimothy: um chimothy: dude idk if i’m entitled to give you suggestions but chimothy: i mean you could always just stick it in the ass???????
or jungkook accidentally sends a stranger a picture of his roommate’s brand new dildo
PREVIEW
the (9)7 wonders of the world
tol: ok here’s the plan dabs 24/7: yugyeom no offence but your plans kinda suck muscle pig: ^^ what bambam said muscle pig: i don’t trust you anymore tol: wow that hurt tol: but i promise you this one will be better dabs 24/7: don’t do it kook tol: it won’t backfire in any way
untilted vhope pairing(s): vhope, namjin genre: humour, fluff tags/warnings: college au, skype dates, profanity, neurobiology/pyschology major!namjoon, ra!jin, music major!yoongi (i think), some major!hoseok, and high schooler!tae, tbh idrk bc i haven’t finished writing it lmao
SUMMARY
When Jung Hoseok signed up for college, he didn’t think he’d end up on academic probation so soon. Hell, he’d never guess he’d have friends who would use him as a fucking lab rat for their atrocious experiments. He definitely did not expect to fall in love with his resident advisor’s little brother—and then proceed to sneak into said resident advisor’s room and hack his computer just to have one more Skype date with the little brother. Without getting caught by said resident advisor. Yeah—he’s a little stressed, to say the least.
→ a continuation of It’s Burning Up in Here.
PREVIEW
He didn’t sign up for this. He thought college would be a great idea—who would pass up the opportunity for ultimate freedom and youthful stupidity? No, he was ecstatic for college—but he definitely hadn’t signed up to be the fucking victim for his resident advisor’s boyfriend’s experiments.
“Hoseok-ssi, please stay still or otherwise this will hurt. A lot,” Namjoon begged as his friend Yoongi tried to hold him down on the fragile coffee table.
“That’s not what your needle’s saying! You said it was a harmless experiment! You said I’d be fine!”
“You will be! I just need practice drawing blood once—”
“You’ve never even done this before?” Hoseok shrieked, writhing some more. Yoongi growled in frustration and flung his entire weight onto Hoseok’s body—and thus effectively snapping the legs of the coffee table and sending them down towards the floor.
His advisor ran into the room then, eyes wide in alarm while holding a skillet filled with half-cooked meat, his creased white apron reading World’s Best Dad! in pretty cursive pink. “What the hell is going on here?”
untitled taekook* pairing(s): taekook, yoonjin genre: fluff, angst, humour, crack tags/warnings: restaurant au, running away, mentions of nudity, exhibitionism, does getting caught dancing naked in your room count as exhibitionism idek, mention of mpreg, but there’s no actual mpreg, i mean it’s the sims it’s not real, many many references to the male organ, but sorry folks no smut (A/N: this is literally what i have in my docs wow i’m such a nerd for preparing ao3 tags LMAO)
SUMMARY
The last thing Jungkook expected after running away to Seoul is to score a private live viewing of Naked_Neighbour_Dancing_In_His_Bedroom.mov—and then proceed to bump into him when he’s not-so-naked. And then also manage to greet him with a slap. It also probably doesn’t help that Nude Neighbour is his new boss. All in all, Jungkook just maybe kinda wants to die. (But of course Seokjin isn’t gonna allow him, so he’s just going to suffer—for now.)
PREVIEW
He sighs, turning his head to gaze out of the window, only to freeze when he realises his view isn’t exactly the most… decent.
Because across from his small studio apartment window is a perfect view of a larger apartment in the building across, and currently, the tenant (he hopes the boy’s the tenant) is enthusiastically dancing through his room completely naked, dinglehopper fully on display. He’s mouthing the words to some song, throwing a finger up in the air as he shuts his eyes and nods his head as though the music (Jungkook thinks there’s music) blasting in his room is speaking to him on a spiritual level.
Jungkook’s face is bright red when he finally breaks out of his trance, and he wishes he wasn’t so bad at reacting appropriately to inappropriate situations so he could at least have saved himself from adding a thirty-second clip of Nude Neighbour to his collection of non-digital memories. He rushes to the window and pulls the curtains close, fingers stiff as he tries to rid his brain of such scandalous images.
At least he was hot.
His face is redder now—if that’s even possible. “Fuck me,” he whispers, and then flushes even more. “Wait, no. Don’t fuck me. That’s not what—why am I even talking to myself. Agh.”
take these words out of my lungs (and set them free) pairing(s): vmin genre: angst, fluff tags/warnings: major character death, suicide attempt, depression, body image issues, depressed!jimin, emotional abuse, verbal abuse, ambiguous original character that appears for like five seconds, high school au
SUMMARY/PREVIEW
three pounds. that’s how much he’s gained since he last stepped on the scale, the dictator that rules over his life. he stares at the numbers again, frowning at the digits glaring up at him. perhaps there was a mistake; maybe the scale is rigged or jammed or simply broken. he couldn’t have possibly gained three pounds in a span of two days. hasn’t he been walking around his neighbourhood enough?
he sighs, stepping off the scale and turning around to flush the toilet before washing his hands. even the cold water burns his skin, and he wishes he could melt through the cracks on the floor. would he slim down then? would he finally be skinny enough?
“jimin!” he hears his mother call, and he forces his way from the sink, sneaking out his parent’s bathroom and into the living room outside. their apartment is small but cozy. jimin hates it.
untitled kim seokjin* pairing(s): platonic OT7 genre: fluff, angst tags/warnings: anxiety, depression, eating disorder, negative body image perception, lapslock (lower case)
SUMMARY
honestly, he can’t remember what it’s like to live anymore.
PREVIEW
breathe in. breathe out.
three lucky charms. four cereal pieces. seven bits down the drain.
he smiles, staring at the milk-stained sink as the spoon clatters against metal, bowl turned upside down. it’s ugly—white ink staining burnt grey like liquid cobwebs feeding on rust. it looks exactly as how he feels: dirty, wasted, trash. one-seventy-nine centimetres down the drain.
untitled kim taehyung pairing(s): Kim Taehyung/Reader genre: fluff, humour, probably angst bc knowing me tags/warnings: (sor far) nudity, profanity
SUMMARY/PREVIEW
Kim Taehyung has no regrets. Sure, he probably should’ve thought twice before he spent all of his money on BIGBANG merch just to show Jungkook that yes, he’s the bigger fanboy, and sure, he definitely should’ve listened to Jimin when he warned Taehyung that no, he shouldn’t eat three whole pizza pies by himself, but that doesn’t mean he regrets any of his decisions. Even though blowing all his earnings on people he’ll never meet did cause him to starve for a good or so month.
(Thank god for ramyeon.)
So, no, Jimin, he doesn’t regret running out of the shower butt naked when he heard her singing on her way to the second floor of their co-ed dorm, doesn’t regret shouting, “I love your voice!” before she screamed, “Oh my god, you’re naked!” And he definitely doesn’t regret yelling, “Oh, shit!” into Oblivion before sprinting back into the bathroom to resume the hot shower he abandoned.
“For fuck’s sake, Taehyung,” Jimin says to him once Taehyung’s finished recounting the story, the two of them lying side by side on Jimin’s bed. “You’re going to get us kicked out.”
“I should probably say hi,” Taehyung muses, blinking at the ceiling. “Do you think she remembers me?”
Jimin glances down, and snickers. “With how small your dick is, she probably does.”
untitled park jimin pairing(s): Park Jimin/Reader genre: fluff tags/warnings: (so far) blind!reader
SUMMARY
He is an angel; and she doesn’t need to see to believe. She fathoms his widespread wings as he gently picks her up, worriedly and urgently asking for her health, voice so soft it touches her skin like silk on smooth glass. His eyes must be crinkled in the corners, a smile stuttering through apologies, heart too warm for the human hand to touch. She imagines what he looks like, faintly deciding through his rapid Korean that he must be chesnut if not vanilla, not in skin but in connotation because he sounds and smells and feels like home.
Her pause is a millennia long, and she hears him repeat himself again, the sound of melting marshmallow oozing out of beautiful lips: “Are you alright?”
She produces a smile, feathery and light, eyes glassy and the world continues to remain black. “I’m fine,” she replies, and her voice is cracked from its lack of use; she hasn’t met anyone worth talking to in what feels like a century. Another smile reappears, much strained than what she’s used to, and she picks herself up from where the concrete lay, the dust falling from her voile skirt. “No damage done.”
untitled kim taehyung #2* pairing(s): Kim Taehyung/Reader, platonic OT7 genre: fluff, angst tags/warnings: i think it’s schizophrenia?, mental illnesses, depression
SUMMARY/PREVIEW
There is a moment when time stands still. It’s fleeting, escaping the moment your fingers curl around it and pull. But it is during this moment happiness enraptures you with its warm hug as your heart thunders against your chest—the steady thump, thump, thump of a snare drum awakening. It is during this moment pain ceases to exist.
But after, everything will come rushing back.
i have more but these are the ones that are decent, at the very least.
to pass the torch on, i’ll tag @minmelly @kinky-koreans @pasteljeonggukk @haneulismykoreanname @rnjmnster and anyone else who wants to do it! (if you don’t, no pressure. good luck to you and your writing!)
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