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teecupangel · 4 months

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Haven’t seen someone suggest this yet. Velociraptor!Desmond. Ancient or modern, either works. Or he’s immortal. But I can just imagine the chaos that a velociraptor in the AC universe would bring. And make it Desmond, even more so.

Then there’s also the idea of whichever Assassins were around in 1924 (when velociraptors were officially categorized) being super confused about why ancient art in Masyaf and works by Leonardo DaVinci seem to depict this dinosaur that was just discovered. Insert 1920’s version of Shaun setting up a conspiracy board.

I had to make this meme…

The funny thing is… raptors are the size of a turkey so I’m just imagining Ratonhnhaké:ton returning to the homestead one day to find the Assassin turkey has made a friend.

Because of his actual size, he can be quite stealthy, making him a good Assassin companion. He also has a big appetite for meat and Leonardo found it fascinating to read an entire page dedicated to the ‘care’ of the creature Altaïr called ‘Desmond’.

Calling it ‘care’ is misleading because it was filled with observations and some complaints of Desmond’s habits, including how he liked to sleep on newly dried laundry.

Leonardo believes Ezio’s Desmond is a ‘descendant’ of Altaïr’s Desmond and paints him. He also wonders how they reproduce considering they are no records of Altaïr’s Desmond having any mate.

And that’s how Leonardo theorizes that Desmonds reproduces all by itself.

That’s right.

‘Desmond’ isn’t Desmond’s name.

‘Desmond’ is the name of the type of creature Desmond is.

Desmond turning into a raptor meant that velociraptors in AC world are now called…

“Desmonds”

No one is more embarrassed by this than Desmond.

But it’s not like he can tell anyone about it.

He was immortal but any time he tried to write by drawing on the ground, it’s just pure gibberish.

But hey…

He is now the ‘model’ of Leonardo’s greatest work titled “Desmond”.

The fact that the art world are actually still debating if Mona Lisa or Desmond is the far superior Da Vinci work only serves to make him all the more embarrassed.

Shaun isn’t helping at all because he keeps researching about Desmonds, all in the hopes of finding another Desmond for… Desmond.

Desmond’s head hurts from all the other Desmonds he had to hear every day.

Immortality truly has its downside.

#desmond is turned into a creature subgenre #is this crack?#this feels like crack #sorry not sorry XD #assassin's creed #desmond miles #ask and answer #fic idea: assassin's creed #teecup writes/has a plot

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introvertedfox · 8 months

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Introducing Derek Roark, for @loveryss' Embracing Erin

[He / Him] Traits: Socially Awkward, Animal Enthusiast, Loyal Aspiration: Friend of the Animals Likes: Orange, Guitar, Ranch Music, Stories, Pet Enthusiasts Dislikes: Pipe Organ, Deception, Egotistical Sims

Derek comes from a long line of very successful Detectives. Both his grandmother and father made it to Chief, so his future was pretty much set up for him the moment he was born. Despite this, he was told all his life that he was too soft, kind-hearted, and weak to make it in Law Enforcement. So he vowed to prove everyone wrong, especially his father. As soon as he finished High School he joined the Police and became a Cadet.

One year later he was one of the best Officers in the Station, had a steady relationship with a coworker, and his relationship with his father was the best it has ever been.

But was he happy?

One day, a work incident due to his burnout, had him rethink all his life. He quit the job, packed his bags, and moved away, leaving his partner and his father behind, never looking back.

Now, one year later he's finally living a life that makes him happy. He surrounds himself with animals all day helping ranches in Chestnut Ridge and plays guitar whenever he can. And he is finally ready to settle in and find someone who shares the same passion for animals as he does. Will that someone be Erin?

#embracingerinbc #I had way too much fun coming up with this guy's backstory #maybe I made it too big #sorry not sorry xD #I've never done this before but #thought I might give it a try #hope you like him!#also I was totally going to make a girl but changed my mind last minute xD #ts4 bachelorette challenge #ts4 gameplay #ts4 #sims 4 #simblr #sims 4 challenge #ts4 challenge

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greenelight · 1 month

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because mason isn't into roses , when his friends found out , they decided to get him something else for when he began doing more stage / broadway roles. as a way to support him & maybe troll him a little , they instead began gifting him different sized squishmallows of the frog character , wendy. mason likes frogs , so they began gifting him this every time , which always looked funny compared to the bouquet of flowers the other actors got. mason isn't a plushy collector by any means , but he does have a shelf dedicated to these little guys & whenever someone visits they assume he's into squishmallows & he just has to sigh & rolls his eyes.

#˗ˏˋ ᵃᶜᵗ ᶤᶤ· ﹙ headcanon ﹚ ﹕ the show must go on.#is this headcanon dumb? maybe #do i care? NAH #i am not a s.quishmallow collector either but i know wendy #she's the cutest frog squish of the whole bunch #i love her #& therefore mason has an army of her against his will #sorry not sorry xD

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moonah-rose · 2 years

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#sorry not sorry XD #ten x donna #source: hacks #incorrect doctor who quotes #dw

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niaxbailey · 6 months

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TASK TWO - FRIENDSHIP MOODBOARD

( @valentinaflorcs ) Just because we can't be together, doesn't mean I won't love you.

#briar ridge task #edits.#ft. valentina flores.#sorry not sorry xD

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rocktheholygrail · 1 year

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#this is old news sorry but omg xD #hannibal #hannibal lecter #will graham #hannigram #murder husbands #nbc hannibal #hannibal nbc

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roz-ani · 3 months

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Dadslight

Dadkeep

Dadboss

#I'm sorry it's awful XD #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel spoilers #alastor #lucifer hazbin hotel #charlie hazbin hotel #mine

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bonniecupcake · 5 months

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I 100% blame @bamsara for making me ship those two from the get-go xD

but seriously, the fact that you started writing fanfiction for it was the final thing that pushed me to buy and play this game, so thank you 💞

#art #narilamb #cult of the lamb #cotl narinder #cotl lamb #colt fanart #sorry for no IZ art this week but I really had to get those 2 out of my system xD #bonbondraws

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nocek · 7 months

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Peter annoying Miguel is the funniest thing but throwing Deadpool at him is like throwing annoyance equivalent if a nuke and I live for it XD

I'm totally accepting the fanon that there may be multiverse out there but there is only one Deadpool as a gospel <3

#spiderverse #peter b parker #miguel o'hara #jessica drew #wade wilson #spiderman #spiderman 2099 #spiderwoman #deadpool #long post #I've spent waaaay too much time on this comic #just to make a dumb joke that isn't even that funny #but I had to XD #I'll go back to animations with Mayday shortly #but for now sorry about amount of dialogue which caused text to be small >.<

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fluffyartbl0g · 10 months

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SUCK IT ZORO AND NAMI BOSS JINBEI FOR THE WIN 👏👏👏

#holy shit nami and zoro are dead #sorry to do this on ur bday nami....#one piece #op fanart #roronoa zoro #usopp #jinbei #jinbe #jimbei #cat burglar nami #op spoilers #one piece spoilers #<<< spoilers just incase people didnt wanna see the sbs questions before they were released XD

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lonicera-edulis · 6 months

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Yes, it's Bilbo's found family.

#the hobbit #sorry Bifur was too good with dot eyes xD

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milkweedman · 1 year

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fiber arts really is such an insane category of Things in how it can draw you in. like, 6 or 7 years ago i learnt to crochet and made a few terrible hats and scarves. then i learnt to knit because i wanted to knit a scarf for my friend (now fiance :D). then i realized it should be a woven scarf so i picked up weaving instead, but i still really liked knitting so now i was doing 3 crafts. somewhere along the way i started dyeing yarn as part of my kitchen experiments, and then i was like fuck it i wanna make my own yarn ! and that is where the problems happened. in the span of like 5 years ive acquired like $2000 of various tools (spinning wheel, combs, cards, blending board, several looms, etc), bought dozens of fleeces, and now my bedroom is basically a craft room with a bed, i have wool covering every flat surface in there as well as a huge dresser full of wool and several large drawers full of wool, i meticulously scrape every last bit of avocado out of the peel so i can use it to dye fleece, and i don’t go anywhere (including in my own house) without at least 2 knitting projects and a spindle.

im not complaining or anything, but the rapid shift from ‘guy who does stuff, idk’ to ‘guy who is worryingly obsessed with wool and will infodump at length about medieval sheep husbandry and the history of nettle as a textile if you give him half a chance’ is like. extremely funny to me.

#this is what happens if you mix adhd autism and wool i think #its got the Textures. its got the stimmy movements. its got the Things To Do Idly With My Hands So I Don't Start Dislocating My Thumbs #like. its crazy #sorry the edible hit like halfway thru writing this #idk where i was going with it xD #spinning #and yes ives youre to blame for 90% of this i think #<3

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zu-is-here · 2 months

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