#story didn’t quite made sense lmao

[joequiinn]

The Dos & Don'ts of Fake Dating | E.M. x reader | pt. 1

[all chapters here]

summary: You propose a crazy idea to the resident freak of Hawkins, Eddie Munson. But maybe he was even crazier for agreeing to it…

notes & tropes: fem reader, faking dating, opposites attract, bratty rich bitch reader, super minor revenge plot, not-quite-enemies-to-lovers

a/n: Was I the only one who turned 18 a month into their senior year and then proceeded to spiral and become The Worst version of themself possible?? Well, this fic is semi-inspired by that shitty part of my life lmao. Reader figure skates though. I can’t figure skate, hurts my feet lol. I never expected to write a fake dating story, but Eddie Munson has had me bewitched for nearly 2 years now, so here we go.

(if you'd like to be added to a tag list, pls let me know!)

wc: 3.9k

Chapter One

The idea came to you during a student council meeting as the class president was droning on about the ‘85 homecoming preparations: you needed to do something crazy, something completely and utterly out of character.

Maybe it was because of your ex breaking up with you just weeks before school started. Maybe it was that senior year itch. Maybe it was the realization that you were turning 18 next week. Hell, maybe you just woke up that morning with a strong sense that the things in your life were no longer satisfying you.

Whatever the cause, since the start of your senior year, you’ve just felt so off.

Your ex, Duncan, breaking up with you right before school started was a low blow, and an absolutely shitty feeling - you didn’t date much, but when you did, it was never the guy that ended things. It wasn’t shitty because you were in love and oh so heartbreak, it wasn’t shitty because you saw a future with him. It was shitty because of how goddamn embarrassing it was.

To your peers, you were a couple that made sense, and in fact people had been urging you to go out for a while. And, obviously, you had grown to like him, considering that you were in a relationship for six months - you never would have put up with him for that long if you didn’t actually like him. But the fact that he broke up with you, and not the other way around, left a sour, spiteful taste in your mouth.

So, perhaps it was that break-up that made you feel different this entire month. Or maybe it was your impending 18th birthday, which made you realize just how close you were to legal adulthood. Whatever the cause, every single aspect of your life up to this point suddenly came under your deep scrutiny. You just weren’t… happy?

That made it sound bad, but what were you enjoying right now? What got you excited every day? As you sat in the student council meeting, zoning out since the very start, you came to think that maybe you had nothing going on right now that you genuinely wanted in your life.

Hell, you weren’t even on the student council because you enjoyed it, Janet just dragged you into it back in your sophomore year. You figured she loved the sense of importance it gave her. She and everyone else in the council probably got off on how important they felt, the dictators of Hawkins High School.

You always ran in this crowd, and before you never questioned it. The popular kids, the rich kids, the successful kids. You don’t remember ever choosing these friends and acquaintances - if anything, it seemed that these peers were all a constant, as if they’d always been there from the very start. You figured it was the natural state of the world - as the daughter of one of the richest men in town, you were predestined to end up here. Not here as in the student council, surrounded by other spoiled rich kids debating the difference between turquoise and cyan. But here in an even broader sense - in a finely curated life, in all the “right” circles, on the path to either greatness or becoming the trophy wife of greatness.

Up until now, you’d never questioned it. Yes, mom and dad, you were a popular kid whose free time was fully booked between college prep, figure skating, student council, dates with a cookie-cutter boyfriend, and everything else under the sun. Yes, mom and dad, you were doing everything they all told you too because it would look great on your college applications, because that’s what you’re supposed to do, because that’s how things have always been done.

It started to dawn on you maybe a week or so into the school year just how mundane you were - you never questioned your time spent skating or on extracurriculars, you never went against the order of things as dictated by only the most popular of your peers. That’s just what was done, what was always done. But after your ex dared to break up with you, you came to realize recently that maybe all of this wasn’t what you wanted - maybe it was time to start making some choices for yourself instead of worrying what your parents told you or what your peers thought or what to do to keep your boyfriend semi-happy.

So, you started to consider what exactly it was that you wanted. And that proved to be more challenging than you anticipated, which probably would have sounded extremely pathetic if you had said it to any of the people sitting next to you.

Did you like figure skating? Of course, it was your idea after all. What you didn’t like was the pressure from your mother to train and become an Olympian, a feat that was never your intention when you took up the sport at six years old. Besides, you told her, you were way past the age for trials, you’d never get in (or, at least, that’s what you told her, because how the hell would you know whether or not there was a cut off age).

Did you like your friends? You thought so - you’d known them virtually your entire life, so you never questioned your relationship with them. But proximity didn’t necessarily go hand-in-hand with likeability. Maybe some of them you actually liked, but the rest? No, they were just around because they always had been.

Did you like your relationship before Duncan broke up with you? No, probably not. Of course, your opinion of him and that entire relationship was soured now, but even at the time, you were probably just going through the motions, doing things that couples do without any real heart in it.

So… What did you want? What did you actually like?

It was jarring to realize that your entire life had been dictated and finely tuned for you from the moment you were born, that even the things you wanted had been molded into new shapes by your parents or your peers or your teachers.

Once you realized how little of your life was in your own hands, you couldn’t get it out of your head. You always saw yourself as someone who was in control, as someone who couldn’t be told shit. And yet, you came to realize that that was far from the truth. It was as if suddenly everything about your life was something you hated. You hated your classes, you hated your friends, you hated running in the same circle as your ex, you hated all your obligations. Through the first few weeks of senior year, all you felt was frustration, disinterest, and absolute boredom with everything around you. Something had to change. And during the bullshit student council meeting, you became determined to make it happen.

So, over the course of that boring as all hell meeting, you tried to figure out what you wanted, and how you were going to get it. You set a goal for yourself, silly but helpful considering the structure you were so accustomed to: you’d set your plan in motion on your birthday. New year, new you, right?

Once you gave yourself that deadline, you then had to think about what exactly you were trying to accomplish - yes, you wanted to make some major changes, you wanted to, in a way, become a new person, but how were you going to do that?

You settled on four key things to keep in mind:

You wanted to piss off your parents big time - your dad barely acknowledged your existence and your mom coddled you, so actually upsetting them would be a feat unto itself. You had to become so awful that even your mother would stop making excuses for you.

You needed to drop your friends - the more you thought about all the people you grew up alongside, the more you realized that you weren’t particularly interested  in relationships with any of them. Whether you made new friends or not wasn’t a priority, in fact you kind of liked the idea of just being left alone.

You had to figure out what you actually enjoyed - outside of skating, you had no idea what really interested you, what you would like to do with your life and your free time. You figured it was time to do some self reflection and focus on finding things that you’d actually enjoy.

And, most importantly, you had to get back at your ex. Yeah, it was stupid to be motivated by a boy, but nothing would make you happier than seeing him worked up and frustrated. Your focus wasn’t on trying to win him back or anything like that - you wanted to piss him off, to exact some kind of revenge for making you look like an idiot when he broke up with you at a party that all your friends had attended.

How you were going to accomplish these, however, was yet to be determined. But they were a damn good starting point, and they got you motivated to become an absolute nuisance to everyone around.

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

The Friday following the student council meeting, you decided to first experiment with a little something, satiate a mild curiosity. To anyone else, it was probably the most mundane thing in the world, but to a high schooler who thought graduation was life or death, doing anything out of the ordinary felt nail-biting.

You were going to sit at a new lunch table.

You had just two days left until your birthday, until you’d officially set your plan in motion, so you still had a little more time to come up with something. So far, you couldn’t think of shit. You were already someone who was blunt and commanding and mean, whose thoughts and feelings were always on your face, so people were used to you being bossy and a little miserable - you couldn’t start being meaner or blunter, you just knew that wouldn’t be enough. Maybe you could start skipping class, maybe you could start flaking on friends, but somehow none of that felt like enough, like it wouldn’t make a statement. You had to really make an impression, to really set yourself up for a total ruination of your social status, you just hadn’t figured out how.

But a new lunch table was as good a starting point as any, right?

You chose a table at the far end of the lunchroom; customarily your group of friends, acquaintances, and ex sat centrally, surrounded by the jocks on one side and the academics on the other. The new table you chose was only occupied by two other people, a dorky little couple who looked at you funny when you sat as far from them as possible. In turn, you gave them an icy cold glare, prompting them to look away quickly, like you were a Medusa who could turn them to stone.

Your stupid little lunchroom plan was a bust, though. Five minutes into your peaceful lunch, your two closest friends, Amelia and Janet found you, each looking perplexed and put-off by your seat of choice. They looked around before lowering into the seats around you, their expression full of something akin to disgust, as if sitting at a different table was that offensive.

“What are we doing over here?” Amelia asked judgmentally, eyeing the couple at the opposite end of the table. Across the lunchroom, a few people (including Duncan) from your usual lunch table looked at you funny, “It’s like we’re exiled or something.”

So dramatic, you thought while staring harshly at her.

“Change of scenery.” You answered plainly, stabbing at the food in front of you. Amelia hummed in acknowledgement, but still made it quite clear that she didn’t agree with the decision.

“What, does this have something to do with Duncan?” She jabbed, receiving another nasty look from you, “So, he’s a jerk? Get over it.”

You should’ve known this idea was too simple to work. Of course they’d just follow you like the lemmings that they were, just as unable to make their own decisions as you were. Yeah, you definitely needed to try something bigger to scare them off.

Briefly, you thought that you could maybe tell them, just say point blank, “Amelia, Janet, I hate being around you and this friendship is done.” But, again, you figured that wouldn’t be good enough, that they’d laugh at your mean sense of humor even if you reiterated yourself. In this crowd, being mean was never enough to make your point, because all of you were nasty, not only to each other but to virtually everyone you met.

And despite your well-known attitude problem, you still cared about Amelia and Janet, flaws and all. These were the girls that you’d known since you were five years old, of course you worried about their feelings at least a little bit - nearly 13 years of friendship would do that to anyone. Guess you had more of a heart than you gave yourself credit for.

You definitely needed a foolproof plan to get out of this friendship, this social circle, this popular bubble that you’d always been trapped in. The friendship had to end without you saying so. You had to push them out until they finally gave up on you. Make it seem like it was their idea, that would definitely work on them.

As you schemed, Amelia and Janet chatted around you. Various acquaintances stopped by the table, all with the same question: what the hell were you guys doing sitting all the way out here? Even Duncan was amongst those that asked, trying to ignore the way you glared daggers at him. Amelia and Janet gave various responses, all of which put blame on you as if this simple little decision meant their utter ruination.

As Duncan was preparing to walk back to your usual lunch table, a commotion rose out in the hallway, the echo of rapid footfall drifting in through the doors. Multiple heads turned to face the cafeteria doors with curiosity, some people peeked out into the hall to check what the yelling was about, scurrying back to their friends to report what they’d seen. You, Amelia, Janet, and Duncan all waited silently, sharing raised brows and curious looks.

Not even a minute later, Eddie freaking Munson came crashing into the lunchroom, a look of total glee on his face as he cackled, not even remotely fazed by all the eyes on him. As he tumbled through the cafeteria doors, you jumped a little at the burst of sound. Eddie’s disruption turned everyone’s heads now, the lunchroom silent in shock and loathing as the resident outcast ran between tables, heading for the set of doors at the opposite end of the room. Your gaze was locked on the shit disturber as he blew past your table, carelessly running into Duncan in the process, but even that collision didn’t slow him down. Duncan yelled at him, but Eddie was focused on one goal, and if this were a cartoon you definitely would have seen dust kick up behind him from how quickly he was moving.

Not too far behind was Coach Miller, a look of absolute rage marring his puffy red face as he pursued Eddie. It didn’t even seem to cross his mind that he was making a fool of himself in front of the entire student body - his only focus was stopping the offender of whatever shenanigans currently pissed him off.

Your gaze turned back to the excited Eddie, an undeniable curiosity rising in you - what the hell did he do to piss off Coach Miller this bad? Sure, the coach was always pretty damn temperamental, but you couldn’t recall ever seeing him look quite this upset before.

Eddie paused at the cafeteria doors to turn and pull a mocking face at the coach before darting from the room, as if nothing in the world could touch him and he was unstoppable.

As Coach Miller disappeared after Eddie and students returned to their usual conversations, albeit with an air of awkwardness, you stared at the cafeteria doors thoughtfully.

That’s when an idea began to form.

You needed to take a page out of Eddie Munson’s book. If anyone in this school knew how to be a thorn in everyone’s side, it was him. So, you spent the remainder of your lunch brainstorming, trying to figure out how to channel even a sliver of Eddie’s energy; you only chimed into the conversation when someone spoke to you directly.

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

In the middle of fifth period, you still weren’t quite sure what your game plan was, but you at least had a vague starting point. While your history teacher rambled on about some significant European war that you couldn’t begin to care about, you tapped your pencil as you thought about Eddie Munson (a sentence that very nearly grossed you out).

You’ve known about him since your freshman year - at the time, he was a year ahead of you, but since then he’d been held back. People always sneered when talking about him, as if Eddie was the most offensive thing they’d ever encountered, as if he was some kind of plague. He went against all social norms you’d learned up to that point, he was contradictory to everything you’d ever been taught about social conduct and likeability - he wore ratty clothes, listened to scary music, acted out in the most theatrical ways possible, and never seemed to give a shit what anyone thought.

You had never spoken to Eddie personally. Through the years you’d had a few classes together, including your math class this year, so you’ve witnessed some of his antics. But really, you knew nothing about the guy. Just the things that everyone else told you, and those things were nothing good. Whether or not Eddie was as bad as people said didn’t matter to you. His reputation was shit, and in this instance that’s exactly what you needed.

So, how were you going to ruin your senior year with the help of Eddie Munson? Well, at the very least, maybe you first had to have a conversation with him. It would be pretty stupid to walk up to him and go “hey, Munson, I know everyone here hates you, how about we chat and you make them hate me, too!”

Maybe you needed to find a way to hang out with him? Pretend to be friends long enough that the rest of the student body begins to ostracize you? With a little amused huff, an even worse thought crossed you: maybe you needed to pretend you were interested in Eddie Munson for a while, that was sure to piss just about everyone off. Especially Duncan.

But then the idea gave you pause.

You could not pretend to flirt with, or even date, Eddie fucking Munson. No chance in hell that would work. No way he would go for it, and no way you’d be able to tolerate him long enough to convince anyone that you were even remotely into him.

But… maybe?

Shit, what a stupid idea.

Or maybe it was a brilliant one.

You mulled it over a few minutes longer - if you were going to, somehow, convince Eddie Munson to pretend to date you, you needed to offer him something in exchange, that was obvious. You needed to give him a good reason to help you out, or this plan was never going to work. Its chances of success already seemed slim to none.

You had one idea, though you weren’t entirely certain if he’d go for it.

Your Uncle Tom was a cop, had been with the force your entire life - and you’d bet he’s probably had at least one run-in with Eddie. Maybe you’d tell Eddie that you could get cops to leave him alone, to stop watching him wearily whenever they were around. You couldn’t promise him too much, of course, but you knew at the very least that you could get your uncle to leave him alone. Or you could even take the fall here and there for whatever trouble Eddie inevitably lands himself in - what cop was stupid enough to arrest the niece of a cop and the daughter of a man who owned half of Hawkins?

It wasn’t foolproof, and you knew there were flaws to be found, but it just might work.

So, with your mind made up, you rip a scrap of paper from your notebook and scribble out a quick message:

Let’s make a deal. Sunday. You pick the time and place. Locker #436

You’d hoped that Eddie would be smart enough to realize that you wanted him to write you back, to drop his own stupid note in your locker so you could meet up and tell him your stupid, crazy idea. God, this better work.

You swiftly raise your hand in the air, giving a small impatient wave when your teacher didn’t acknowledge you right away, instead trying to focus on his lecture.

He rolled his eyes when he spotted your hand in the air, pointing at you and saying in an annoyed monotone, “What’s so important that you’re interrupting?”

Without any hesitation, you state bluntly, “Lady troubles.”

The teacher looks shocked by how plainly you stated it. But because it was you that said it and not someone else, your peers didn’t dare laugh, although a couple boys seemed to choke in surprise or amusement.

“Go, go…” Your teacher waved you off before continuing his lecture, wanting to forget the small interaction entirely.

You exited the room and roamed the halls confidently. Eddie’s locker wasn’t hard to miss - he was one of the students that decorated the metal with crude permanent marker sketches, and the school was too cheap to care about replacing or painting over it. As you approached Eddie’s locker, you checked around to make sure no one spotted you; it wasn’t as if you were committing a crime, but you didn’t need anyone wondering what you were up to in case this plan didn’t work.

So, you slipped the note into his locker, returned to class, and waited impatiently for the final bell of the day to ring, hoping that Eddie would actually stop by his locker and not just leave school without ever seeing your note.

When the end of the day came, it took everything in your power not to rush back to your own locker - just in case, you didn’t want him spotting you there. Why all the secrecy, you sure as hell didn’t know, but you nonetheless continued it.

So, you waited, stopping into the bathroom to check your makeup, walking with Amelia and Janet as they stopped at their own lockers. As the three of you exited the building and walked into the parking lot, you pretended to remember something, telling them that you needed to run back inside. You said your quick goodbyes and went back to wandering the halls, finally opening up your own locker.

It was stupid that your heart leapt when you saw a crudely torn piece of paper resting on top of some of your belongings.

You opened it quickly, eagerly reading the metalhead’s response:

Picnic table behind the football field, 4.

God, what were you getting yourself into.

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x you #stranger things #em #dos and donts

[mykneeshurt]

Envy

Shout out (again lmao) to @ave661 for the artwork (I’m sorry I tag you so much lmao)

Possessive Keegan x F!reader

Inspired by Bad Omens - Death of Peace of Mind

Not proofread because I’m legit so tired lmao I could have done more to this but my brain isn’t working x

Warnings - 18+, minors DNI, possessive and jealous themes, p in v, unprotected sex, goes without saying but it’s the internet ini, this is fiction. This is not a healthy relationship.

•

The buzz of the bar hummed around you, strangers going about their business, wrapped up in their own little worlds. You sipped at your drink as you watched life unfold before you. Couples sharing intimate conversations, friends sharing stories, laughter. That’s when you noticed a pair of silvery blue eyes watching you from across the bar.

Keegan.

More specifically your ex-boyfriend Keegan.

Absolutely not wanting to get into it you finished your drink and made your way out of the bar. You could feel his eyes bore into you as you took your leave. Watching. Waiting.

It was an early autumn evening. Still warm but with a noticeable chill now in the air. Pulling out your phone your text your best friend, informing them that you’d seen Keegan at the bar and that you were making your way home. Going for a drink on your own wasn’t unusual for you. You did it quite often in fact, happy in your own company, watching the world go by. It gave you time to decompress, to think.

The taxi rank was about a 15 minute walk away, the streets weren’t too crowded, it being a Sunday after all. Everyone at home too full to move after their roast dinner. Various alley ways lined the streets, the first golden crisp leaves began to fall, the breeze encapsulated you in its warm embrace.

It was perfection. Your favourite season.

You allowed your mind to drift, forgetting all about seeing your ex-boyfriend. Entranced within your own world. And that’s when he pounced.

A firm broad body slams into you, pushing you full force into one of the alleyways. Before a shriek could even fall from your mouth a large hand muffled your mouth. Effectively silencing you. Your body hit the red brick wall with a dull thud. Dazed you eventually focused on your assailant, eyes widening as you were met with Keegans face.

His ashen eyes stared into your very soul, your essence. Your brows knitted together confused as you relaxed into his form. He’d never laid a hand on you, if anything he was sickly sweet, worshipping the ground you walked on. But he had a jealous side, one that he had managed to hide well. But the mask slipped, as it always did. He became possessive, envious of every interaction you had. He didn’t control or coerce you in anyway, but he’d always let you know what he was thinking. He wanted you all to himself. That’s when you ended it.

And by the looks he wasn’t getting over you any time soon.

Slowly he removed his hand, allowing your short sharp breaths to echo in the cramped alley. ‘Keegan?’ Your eyes fluttered around his features, trying to make sense of this … situation. ‘Hi sweetheart’ he drawled, his voice thick like caramel. Still breathless you whispered ‘what are you doing?’ He watched as your chest rose and fell, your lungs fighting against the adrenaline pumping through you.

He tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear as he caressed your cheek. ‘Just missed you is all. Saw you across the bar n needed to tell you.’ Scrunching your nose you scoffed ‘then just tell me like a normal person? Instead of pinning me in an alley way. Christ Keegan.’

‘Fuck, I love it when you’re angry.’ His eyes fell to your lips, watching as the corner of your mouth twitched.

Dropping his head he nuzzled into your neck, as he slipped his knee between your thighs. Slightly pushing your dress up against your skin. ‘Keegan’ you warned, your tone sharp and commanding. But that’s when he trailed his tongue from your neck to your earlobe, nipping at it gently. ‘Fuck you smell so good sweetheart’ you felt his voice rumble through his chest and onto yours. Your breath hitched in your throat as he pulled at your hip, his 6’1 frame towering over you.

‘Keegan …’ it was less of a warning and more of a plead, your breathless voice seeped into his skin spurring him on. ‘Missed the way you say my name sweetheart’ his grip on your hip tightened. Causing you inadvertently roll your hips into him, arching your back off the brick wall.

You brushed your cheek against his, his sharp jaw cut against your skin as you melted into him. With his other hand he snaked it up your body, along your neck and into your hair. Twisting it in his grasp. A surprised moan fell from you lips as he nipped your collarbone.

Peering over his shoulder you tried to scope out the street, to see if any passers by had clocked you. The street appeared empty, the off leaf tumbling by the entry way, the sky gradually darkening with every minute.

Giving in slightly you placed your hands on his arms, squeezing them gently. Heavy breaths fell in between the two of you. Nipping at your jaw he finally placed his lips on to yours, going against your better judgement you reciprocated the kiss. Lips dancing in unison as he swiped his tongue against yours. Sighing deeper into the kiss you tangled your fingers in his jet black hair, eliciting a hiss from him.

He placed his hand at the small of your back pulling you further into him. Breaking the kiss he trailed kissed from your lips to your neck again, knowing it was your sensitive spot. Using his free hand he cupped your jaw, dragging his thumb along your lips. You nipped and sucked on it gently, muffling the guttural moans from your chest. Thrusting his knee upwards closer to your cunt it grazed your swollen clit.

You jerked your hips, desperate to relieve the mounting pressure. Feeling you grind against his thigh he cupped your pussy, feeling how wet you were through your lace panties. ‘Always knew I could still make you wet baby, you want me to fill this cunt? Just like I used to? … hmmm?’ You knew this was so wrong, you ended it for a reason, but he always knew how to work your body. How to make you come undone with a mere touch.

‘Yes … fuck, yes’ you muttered.

With that he swept your panties to the side and plunged two fingers into your weeping cunt. Not giving you any time to adjust to his fingers he began pumping them in and out of you. Clenching onto the back of his neck you buried your face into his shoulder, biting at his muscular form. The sound of the wet pussy echoed in the alleyway as you desperately tried to stifle your moans. ‘Such a pretty little cunt. All those pretty sounds just for me. Only me’ his voice was possessive and deep.

You could feel his erection pressing against your thigh, he was thick, it honestly surprised you every time. Dropping your hand you began rubbing his cock over his jeans, causing him to buck his hips slightly. With small gentle motions he began to circle your clit, adding to the pressure that was building in your core. He felt you clench against his fingers, ‘give it to me baby, wanna feel you cum … c’mon’ he cooed, his voice soft but demanding.

He kept his rhythm going, his moans melted into your ears as you rubbed his cock. He felt you clench tighter, throwing your head back your jaw fell slack as you started into to pant. Feeling yourself pass through the veil into an ocean of euphoria you clenched your eyes shut. Your hips writhed and jerked on his hand as his fingers remained inside you.

Tugging as his belt he soon got the message, removing his fingers he placed them on his tongue. Eyes rolling back into his head at your taste, a taste he missed to fervently. Yanking down his jeans and boxers his thick cock flung free. Wasting no time he hooked your thigh around his waist and pushed into you. Both gasping at the change in sensation as your walls hugged his cock. The evening air nipping at your exposed cores.

He placed his forehead against yours, biting his lip as he whimpered. Noses bumping together as he thrust into you, making up for lost time. ‘Missed the way you fuck, the way you taste’ he whispered against your lips. A grin broke out across your lips as you whined into him, reigniting a kiss. It was sloppy, messy and driven by his intense possessiveness of you. But fuck did he know how to work you, how to break you.

You muttered a string of nonsensical phrases under your breath as you savoured the feeling of him again. He stretched out your walls as the tip of his cock kissed your cervix, his fingertips clenched onto your thigh like a vice. Trying to steady himself but to pull you closer, despite there being no more room. Your arms draped around his neck, nails digging into his flesh as you let the intense pleasure consume you.

Feeling your oncoming orgasm grow deep with you, he gripped your jaw forcing you to look at him. ‘Fuck sweetheart, that’s it, cum on my cock’ he said drawling every last letter, every last syllable. You mouth fell open as heat rose against your skin, dropping a hand to your clit to push you past the edge. He quickly slapped a hand over your mouth as you came, stifling your moans, muffling his name. The vibrations of your sounds shattered through him, as he came seconds later. He bit down on his lip, hard. Quietly whimpering as he watched your blown out pupils search his face, for what he wasn’t sure.

He pulled out slowly, but not before pushing his cum back into your cunt. You jolted at the sudden intrusion before smirking to yourself. He kissed you again, but this time it was slower, tender. As he pulled away he ran his thumb across your lips ‘you’ll always be mine.’

————

Taglist - @taurus-ted @luminousbeings-crudematter

‘The way you fuck the way you taste’ I didn’t make this up, this is from the song. God bless you Noah Sebastiann

#keegan russ smut #keegan x reader #keegan cod #keegan p russ #cod keegan #keegan russ x you #keegan russ #cod ghosts

[slyandelusive]

Roommate fate.

Summary: you find happiness in the form of your mothers intern. Tigris Snow x Whatnot!reader (Fabricia Whatnot’s daughter).

Fic note: I made Fabricia Whatnot act nicer towards Tigris in this than how she does in the actual book, also according to the thg wiki the currency in Panem in “panars” so that’s what I used when talking briefly about money in this. Speaking of money reader is completely unaware of the Snow’s financial situation but it’s hinted that Fabricia knows.

A/N: Posting this then legging it lmao💀🏃‍♀️ I had so much fun writing this but in the same breath it’s been years since I tried my hand at writing fics so yeah, I’m not claiming to be Shakespeare here haha. I have proof read this but sometimes mistakes slip through and if that happens here rest assured I’ll realise at some point, be consumed by embarrassment and then fix it. Hope you like this even if it’s just a little bit, mwah! <3

Also the bottom lace divider was made by @plutism :)

It was hot and humid and you could hear her breathing.

It’s three months to the day since your mothers intern, Tigris Snow, had moved into your family home. Your mother had told you about the plan for Tigris to move in as casually as ever while at dinner, you can still remember how the hot tomato soup felt stuck in your throat as you began to cough in surprise. You had no idea why your mother would offer such a thing to a Snow, your family was far from poor but with your mother gaining her riches after the dark days you were classed as new money, why would a Snow want anything to do with that?

Your mother said it was nothing to worry about, that it was to do with some stylist guidance thing but the last thing you wanted was for her to accidentally offend a Snow.

You didn’t know what to think when it came to Tigris but she turned out to be kind, kinder than you ever expected. You hadn’t known her too personally before she moved in, only ever seeing her trailing after your mother or sat at a desk in your mothers studio completely engrossed in whatever was in front of her, you were convinced you could tap dance around her when she was in that state and she wouldn’t even turn her head. The night your mother told you about this arrangement you went to bed thinking about every time you’d heard someone describing the Snows as uptight and cold, you’d recounted every story, every rumour in your head before you made yourself snap out of it, your final thought about Tigris before she moved in was that if anything, you had to at least give the girl a chance.

The first month with Tigris was coated with a sense of giddiness, each time either of you saw the other it was like you were first years at school again, eager to make friends, eager to be comfortable and eager to know everything about the other.

You were out when Tigris first arrived but your mother was there to greet her and told her to make herself at home. Tigris got as settled as she could in a room that wasn’t originally hers, when she entered she was met with two seemingly untouched beds, she poked around enough to find that the oak chest of drawers had two left empty for her and the wardrobe also had room made for her. She stood in the middle of the room slowly turning trying to get a feel for it, her eyes fell upon two desks, one covered in books, notes and pens and the other touched only by a lollipop and a fashion magazine, Tigris smiled hard as she picked up the sweet and flicked through the magazine, she’d like it quite nicely here.

Unbeknownst to Tigris she had set up camp in the bed that was already yours. You returned home in the afternoon and as you walked into your bedroom ready to greet your new roommate you tried not to falter too much as you saw her sat on your bed painting her nails, you decided to go with it not wanting to make her uncomfortable or embarrassed in a situation that was probably harder for her.

As you walked into your room that night ready to go to bed you were ever so slightly taken aback seeing Tigris asleep in the bed that was bought for her, as you walked up to your bed you found a not laying on your pillow,

“You should’ve said this bed was yours and I would’ve switched sooner! Thank you for not being mad about it.”

The note was written in pink ink and she’d drawn a smiley face and a little butterfly at the end of it. You’d find out the next morning your mother had mentioned in passing how you loved staring out of that window watching whatever the world was offering, she said she couldn’t believe you’d given it up and that was when Tigris realised it probably wasn’t intentional.

Her note had left your mind till a few days later when you found that it had fallen down by the side of your bed, you picked it up and slipped it in a small trinket box not realising Tigris was watching you and not seeing the grin that graced her lips when she saw that your were keeping it.

After creating a foundation of stability the pair of you spent the second month exchanging every silly secret you’d ever kept. If you were getting paid every time one of you whispered “hey, you still awake?” across the bedroom you’d be accused of stealing from the Cranes, Tigris and you would stay up till stupid hours in the morning, till you had to relight the candles, talking about anything and everything, you both had the matching eye bags to prove it.

You liked talking to Tigris, she spoke like how you’d imagine a swan would if they could talk, her voice was soft and elegant, she spoke so gently yet still with so much conviction it made your head feel fuzzy. She’d give you her full attention when you were talking too, sometimes she’d look at you so intensely it’d make you forget what you were talking about completely.

All of that lead you to now, the third month came and plagued your mind with thoughts of why is it so hard to figure out if a girl likes girls and why does straight up asking a girl if she does paint your intentions out so obviously. It’s currently June making nighttime the sticky type of hot where you feel like you have to peel the sheets off of you if you even dare to use them, you’d spent around an hour tossing and turning before admitting you weren’t getting sleep any time soon, you decided on going to get something to eat, you know just incase tiredness could come in form of snacks.

You tiptoed out of your bedroom, careful not to wake the lucky Tigris who appeared to be sleeping and began to make your way down to the kitchen, now stood at the counter pooling jam onto your plate and trying to figure out which cheese you wanted before allowing yourself to think deeper. Far too much was at stake here, if Tigris didn’t feel the same and was uncomfortable about it not only would you lose a friend but she might want to stay away from you completely meaning your mother would lose her intern. You sighed and once more let your thoughts be consumed by sweeter things as you started slicing a peach.

Your eyes were focused solely on your plate as you made your back up the stairs and into your room, opening the door slowly trying to minimise both the creaking noises and the chance of you dropping your plate. Once inside you made a beeline to your bed not caring to look anywhere else, you sat with your head resting against the wall as you stared out your window, looking to see which neighbours still had their lights on, at the skipping ropes left on the curb by kids and the slightly drunk man that had tripped over them.

You were mindlessly reaching for a peach slice, eyes still on the window making your movements look somewhat robotic when a voice startled you.

“You not gonna share?” Spoken out of nowhere your head banged off the wall slightly before you snapped it to the other side.

“Jesus Christ Tigris!” You exclaimed in a rushed whisper, a scream kept stuck in your throat.

“What? Surely your mother told you sharing is caring and how to properly treat a guest.” Tigris stated casually with a small grin adorning her face.

“You’re not funny Tig.” Shaking your head as you spoke but holding no true offence in your voice.

Tigris let out a stifled laugh and threw her head back. “Actually I’m very funny, I’m a very funny person that wants in on your picnic.” Grinning again as she manoeuvred her way down the bed closer to you.

You rolled your eyes but shuffled down your bed too, holding the plate out and letting her take her pick. Tigris pulled away with the apple you’d already bitten, a slice of buttered bread and a sugared shortbread biscuit, you swatted at her hand as she stuck two fingers in the pile of jam you made and laughed.

You fell back into your regular routine of talking, well whispering, about whatever came to mind. Had you heard about the new drama with the Plinth prize? That a bakery had started charging nine panars for just one pastry? Or what about that man that’d dyed his hair for different colours had you seen him!? You told her about the drunk man you saw earlier and your night carried on with mindless questions.

“Hey I heard Festus Creed asked you on a date and you turned him down what’s all that about?” The line of questioning took you off guard even though it was spoken like every one of Tigris’ previous questions.

You stuttered slightly before fidgeting with the ends of your blanket in front of you and answering. “Oh uhm nothing really he’s just not my type.”

“What too young?” Tigris’ tone was still casual but slightly teasing, looking you directly in the eye.

“Yeah that and I’m not all that into guys.” You pushed the sentence out of your mouth fast enough before your mind convinced you not to, that decision was made on a mix of lack of sleep and not wanting to lie to her.

“Oh.” Her voice was somehow softer and she gulped slightly before replying. Tigris’ face was painted with confusion like she was expecting you to say anything but that.

“Oh?” Your voice held a sense of urgency, you licked your bottom lip to stop yourself from biting at it.

“No no no that’s like really uhm cool.” Tigris sat up as fast as she was speaking, head nodding in tow.

You let out a small snicker before speaking “It’s cool?” Your eyebrows were scrunched and your mouth had turned up into a grin.

“Super cool.” Tigris spoke like she was a high biology professor stating a proven fact.

Your hushed laughter filled the room you nodded in a agreement “Super cool.”

“Exactly.” Tigris voiced, you’d never seen her smile like this before.

Silence fell over the pair of you once again, Tigris lay back down and your attention returned to you plate, you both took turns trying to sneak glances at each other and then try to hold back your laughter when one of you would catch the other.

You were almost done with smothering the last bit of jam onto your last piece of bread when Tigris spoke up again.

“So, is there a girl you have your eye on?” Tigris spoke slowly, testing the waters.

The question caught you off guard, not wanting to look like a fool but also not wanting to misinterpret what Tigris was talking about.

“Uh well I’ve heard Vipsania Sickle’s older sister is recently single.” You gulped slightly before speaking and returned your attention back to your jam after stopping.

“You’d go out with a Sickle girl!” Tigris somewhat exclaimed, voice still held to a whisper but her shock was evident. The lengths the pair of you would go to to not wake up your mother!

“Yeah why not, I heard her family has their own box at the theatre and I’ve always loved the ballet.” You nodded your head to left, motioning toward your desk that held a stack of old tickets.

Tigris was left to think and the silence resumed, you finished your last bit of bread and situated yourself back laying down in your bed, ready to give sleep another go. Around twenty minutes passed before the last interruption of the night came.

“Hey y/n.” Tigris spoke softly

“Yeah Tig.” You whispered back

“If things don’t take off with that Sickle girl, I’d love to take you out some time.” Tigris spoke again before you could reply. “You know cause we’re both super cool girls that like super cool girls.”

You laughed in response at first, a laugh that felt like summer, more like a happy giggle.

“Yeah I’d like that a lot Tig.” You thanked your lucky stars that there was enough street light gleaming into your room so you could see the way Tigris smiled and laughed too.

“You just run your plans past Sickle and I’ll be here waiting.” Tigris proclaimed with the teasing tone back in her voice, nodding her head and pointing her finger at you, you both knew you’d never speak to Vipsania’s sister for anything romantic again.

#thank you for reading <333 #and they were roommates #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #tigris snow #tigris snow x reader #tigris snow imagine #tbosas fic #tbosas fanfiction #tbosas x reader

[prince-kallisto]

“An amusement park full of free games, rides, and food? I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to take a day off from my strenuous duties to goof off- I mean to supervise you all!”

This is my silly design for Crowley’s “Playful Land” event costume haha \(//∇//)\ Since the full story isn’t out yet, I may have jumped the gun a bit…but since all the students look like puppets, I thought it would be fun for Crowley to have a ringmaster theme. However, the outer accessories were meant to disguise him as a clown with a lot of inspiration drawn from carnival/fair attractions like carousels, shooting games, etc. But underneath it all, he’s still wearing a ringmaster’s outfit, if that makes sense

I talk more about my concept sketches and thought process below!

These two photos above are meant to be the final concept art showcasing my mental image of how his outfit works haha.

This design came to me surprisingly quick since I had a strong mental image of what I wanted him to look like. However, I DO wish I kept exploring with his design. I usually spend a lot of time in the exploration phase, especially when it’s for a nicer drawing. This above concept art was pretty much the “final” design I made before I started drawing him. And as you can tell from the finished art, there were quite a few changes…the amount of changed details alone make it an entirely different outfit haha. It caused me a lot of pain while sketching AND inking…I think I got overexcited with this event and I jumped right into inking. In fact, I had a start from scratch after inking my first art- the proportions and design was all wrong haha. A lesson learned.

From the start, I knew I wanted a ringmaster-disguised-as-a-clown theme, but I think the detachable clown pants really put it all together haha. I like outfits that can “shed” themselves to reveal a hidden theme underneath.

In his initial final design, he had a red feathered coat, meant to resemble the feathers in the students hats. This was one of the many things that changed last minute because I didn’t like how the big cost looks in Crowley’s pose haha. But I like this change better actually- it stands out to his usual headmasters coat, and it resembles Malleus’s masquerade cape. His coat lapels are decorated to look like a piano- I think there was a piano scene in Pinocchio? I actually didn’t check at all…

The carousel hat was the first thing I came up with haha, I thought it was funny. I wonder if it’s functional…that would be a funny animation haha. His bird mask is too iconic to drastically change, so it’s just a different color and shape with some beading to look like clown makeup/tears. I love how the novel describes Crowley as flamboyant yet melancholic…

I’ve only gone to a fair once in my life many years ago, so I had to search up common carnival games. I’ve seen festival games in Japanese media, where a rifle with a wooden cork is used to shoot down plushies/other prizes- and I think it would be a really fun and eccentric cane design haha. Perhaps if someone is really misbehaving, he can aim a cork at them? 🤭

The shape of his tie and thigh harness was another sudden design choice made during official drawing, but I like it! It incorporated the ribbons everyone else has without having Crowley being the one “controlled.” The gold points on his shoes are actually removable- it’s part of his “clown” theme. The white spats were made to match him with Fellow Honest- like a hint that he’s not one of the performers since he matches with the owner of Playful Land. Ahhh I’m still learning how to use gouache, and the background was a mess…but it’s inspired off of this Pinocchio concept art! It’s so gorgeous! I’m sorry Ortho…

And finally, the masks on his waist. They’re wrapped around his waist with rope, and are made to resemble the faces of certain characters. Average Kallisto moment of being the most unsubtle person ever with my theories LMAO. Anyway, I thought it would be the perfect event to include various masks on his costume in a similar placement where the mirrors are in his regular outfit. Since he has a lot of carnival game themes in his outfit, perhaps he can pretend he’s a mask vendor haha.

@marrondrawsalot Haha I’m not sure if you remember, but a long while back I made a Glorious Masquerade Crowley design, and we decided that I could tag you if I made a future event design. It’s been a while! ｡ﾟ(ﾟ´ω`ﾟ)ﾟ｡

#twisted wonderland #twst #my art #twst playful land #dire Crowley #twst Crowley #twst dire Crowley #kallistopost #twst fanart #twst art #sndbxhsj sorry that the photo looks blurry #I had to use some editing to hide to streaky gouache in the background andddd and messed up the resolution #I mean I prefer that over the terrible background but #NSBXHSJS one of the moments I’d prefer to do digital art #because I think half of my issues would’ve been solved LOL #or maybe I should just Get Good at painting… #yeah 👉👈

[bloodynereid]

maybe like one with karen and reader where its like the one you did for warren but like how karen and readers relationship was while living with the six. ohhh or like you could do the beach scene with karen and maybe its just karen and reader or like they also tag along with graham and the blondie. lmao im dying for more karen fics

Echoes of Pain & Love

pairings: karen sirko x fem! reader & karen sirko x graham dunne (for plot purposes)

a/n: hiii anon! hopefully this is up to standards cause i really enjoyed writing this fic - even if it is really sad (i'm sorry about that btw). i didn't add the second part of the request cause i didn't feel like it fit in naturally with the story if that makes sense. i love writing for karen (we are in desperate need of more karen fics) so i hope you enjoy this. used a different perspective with billy on this one cause i thought it would be interesting to look into that avenue of family ties. also i promise my next karen fic will be fluffy instead of the whirlwind that this is.

tw: drug addiction, mentions of cigarettes, swearing, religious trauma (slightly mentioned), abortion, pregnancy, period typical homophobia mentions, mafia mentions (? honestly it's like a comedy point so not really a tw), angst angst angst, kissing, drinking, rehab mentions, mental health problems kind of mentioned, overdose

description: the rise of the biggest band in the world and the cloud of pain and love that surrounds a particular member and the love of her life.

Y/N Dunne: Hi? Is this on? Okay yeah great. We ready to start?

You were born in a small town called Hazelwood, Pittsburgh. Around 2 minutes before your twin, Billy. From that moment on you two were inseparable so when he wanted to learn guitar, you also learned guitar. When you took up your strange art hobby, he also started bringing a sketchbook everywhere along with him. So when your little brother Graham convinced him to join his little band, Billy also dragged you along with him.

You took the band almost as seriously as Billy, even if you still had some aspirations for going to university (which you never told Billy). Over the years until little Graham graduated high school you guys didn’t practice as much as you practiced the year after graduation. After each session your fingers were stinging and calluses upon calluses started to form.

You guys were playing gigs upon gigs and it was going incredibly well. Until you had to play a wedding, a wedding where your father was in attendance.

“Billy, Y/N what the hell? Are you guys okay?” You had rushed after Billy when you noticed that the creep dancing with the girl ages younger than him was your father. Currently you were holding your twin in your arms as unbridled rage filled your very being. You could feel that same rage radiating off Billy.

“You noticed the creep with the combover?”

“Yeah…”

“He’s our dad.” You responded, that made Billy unwarp himself from your arms and go thundering back into the wedding. You quickly followed him in and stood by his side as he confronted your father before smashing his guitar and storming off.

“Do you remember me?” You asked your absentee father after Graham punched him and walked off.

“Of course, girl. You have grown into quite a beaut huh?” A grossed out look overtook your face before you kneed that stupid little man right in the balls. As he kneeled over in pain you took the opportunity to spit on him and walk off in the direction of your brothers.

Warren: Y/N was and still is a badass. Never and I mean never underestimate that woman.

After that incident, life calmed down a bit. Practice continued and Camila appeared in your life after somehow Billy miraculously whisked her off her feet at a laundromat. You were happy to have another girl around and you would constantly tease Billy about how in love he was with her.

“You are such a softie!”

“I am not!” Billy had just gotten back from the dinner with Camila’s parents and he had found you watching tv and painting your nails in the living room with Graham napping on the other side of the couch.

“You know when you find someone I’ll be reminding you of these moments.”

“Shut up!” You threw the pillow that Graham had his head on towards Billy’s face which caused Graham to violently wake up to find his grown up siblings having a pillow fight in the middle of the living room.

Y/N: The night we opened for the Winters… right. Fuck that was night we all met Karen. *strained laughter* Graham was so in love with her. Oh! And Chuck right yeah that’s how I became the bassist. Billy nearly gave it to Eddie.

Chuck had basically rushed back inside his house, probably intimidated by all the very judgemental looks you all were giving him. Who would leave the band just like that? And to go into fucking dentistry?

“Okay how the hell are we going to play next week?” You asked as you stamped out your cigarette harshly.

“Eddie, you're going to have to be on bass.” Billy said with his usual commanding tone.

“Like hell I will.” Eddie responded with a scoff.

“Look we need-”

“I can do it.” You piped up, Eddie and Billy’s fights never ended well; it was as if a cloud of tension just permanently lived between them.

“What?” Your twin turned to you with a confused look on his face.

“Well I worked on the bass lines with Chuck cause he’s a mediocre player anyways so I pretty much know them front to back. Plus we don’t really need another rhythm guitarist anyways.”

“You sure?”

“Positive. You guys want to come over to practice at our house? I’m pretty sure mom went out with some of her friends.”

“Yup.”

“Sounds good.”

Y/N: I was lying about those bass lines by the way but someone needed to diffuse that situation.

Eddie: Fucking hell Y/N was a saving grace that day. She always was when the band was still together. I think it’s cause she knew Billy the best. They had this way of communicating that was downright creepy. Twin telepathy and all that crap.

The day you opened for the Winters started with cramping fingers and a slight tickle in your throat. You had barely been sleeping. Billy always called you a perfectionist and it was probably the worst trait to have when you were trying to prepare for the biggest night of your life. Then you saw… her.

The venue for one was stunning and huge. But what really lit up the place was the blonde on the keyboard. She was like an angel. So deeply entranced in the music and so fucking confident.

Men never really interested you. Sure they were attractive in the objective sense but whenever you thought of who you wanted to walk down the aisle for it was always a woman you envisioned. It had been like that since childhood. What made it worse was the church. Your mother wasn’t particularly religious but you always went to church on Sundays and the priest always spoke about homosexuals being part of the devil’s work.

You thought you needed to be fixed. Which is why you had tried throughout high school to date men or rather boys. But it never worked out. Whenever they got too close to kissing you you ended it with them or got Billy to help.

After that you just stopped trying to pursue that idea and just decided to live for the rest of your life alone. Or… with a woman if you ever found her. But living in Hazelwood, Pittsburgh had its challenges in that department. You would become the town pariah if you told the wrong person. And… you had no idea how to even start to mention it to your brothers.

But she was like an angel. Radiant under the stage lighting.

“Ooo somebody’s in love.” Oh fuck. You quickly spun around trying to see if Warren’s voice was directed at you but thankfully it wasn’t. Instead it was to your little brother who was staring at… her. Your heart clenched and your grip on your bass case tightened. The sharp pain sent through your aching fingers brought you back down to Earth. Of course she would never go for a girl, hell she’s probably straight. You briskly walked away from the pair and through the backstage door.

If you had turned around you would have noticed the girl’s eyes staring at you as you disappeared behind the swinging doors.

Y/N: I think I played okay that night. I mean the atmosphere was electric and I guess you could say that it was the night that marked the beginning of everything.

Billy: Y/N was incredible that night. She always downgrades her playing skills but it was as if she was born to play guitar. And no I’m not just saying that because she’s my twin.

Karen: I was stunned by Y/N when I first saw her play. When she told me, years later, that she had learnt all those riffs in less than a week I was blown away.

Y/N: Anyways after that night we headed off to the city of angels. Fucking Rod Reyes somehow convinced us. And well Billy also miraculously got Cami to follow us. Still don’t know how my imbecilic twin did it.

You were all gathered at one of the numerous LA diners as Graham made the phone call. The phone to that stunning woman that your brother (and you) had a big crush on. Her name was Karen. Karen Sirko.

You passed the cigarette you were sharing with Warren back to him as you watched your youngest brother flounder on the phone as he tried to talk to the supposed woman of his your his dreams.

“Look, just pass me the phone.” You said as you got up and took the phone from his slightly sweaty hands. Ignoring his protests you spoke into the receiver.

“Hi Karen. This Y/N Dunne.”

“Hi… Y/N Dunne. The bass player right?” Her silky British voice filled the phone and a slight shiver ran down your back.

“That would be me. Anyways what my idiotic little brother was trying to say-”

“Hey!” You heard Graham protest in the background.

“How would you like to join the band?”

“Oh bloody hell it’s burning. Guys it’s burning.”

“Uhh…”

“Sorry about that. Minor kitchen emergency.”

“You’re all good. So… what do you say?”

“To what?”

“Joining the band.”

“In Pittsburgh?”

“We’re actually in LA now. Gigs are lined up and we have a house in Laurel Canyon.”

“Hmm what do you think?”

“What do I think about what?” You asked as you leaned against the phone booth as everyone stared at you with anticipation, Graham most of all.

“Do you think it’s worth it?”

“You’re asking the wrong person. My mother always called my brother and I dreamers.”

“Hmm… you know what, yes. Send me the address and I’ll see you then.” Karen hung up the phone and you replaced it in the phone booth before turning around.

“Well?”

“We have a new member of the band!”

Y/N: I remember during those months that I had the strangest assortment of jobs. I worked at a movie theater, a bakery, an ice cream parlor, in a record store and I even think that I might have accidentally been working at a front for a mafia business. That was the secretarial job and it was the one I kept the longest. Employers let just say didn’t particularly like me. At least the mafia did so you know. That definitely says something about me. I had the secretarial job when Karen finally arrived.

You had had a very long and grueling day at the office dealing with a strangely large amount of angry Italian men. But you got through it and you finally came home… bearing the gifts that Warren and your twin always loved. Two slices of apple tart from your boss's mother who always appreciated giving them to you since he had a specific dislike of apples but a fear of his mother.

“Honeys I’m home!” You walked into the living room to find Graham, Warren and Eddie battling each other with the random things, a daily occurrence.

“Ooo did you get the apple thing?”

“Of course.”

“You are truly an angel sent from heaven.” Warren gave you a forehead kiss before he whisked away the white box in your hands.

“Yeah yeah.” You moved to go to your room which was quite literally the size of a broom closet but at least you had a bed. Even if it was crammed on top of a bunk with a desk under it. After you had changed out of your formal wear and into a button down and shorts. You slid into the living room with your pair of fluffy socks and snatched the blunt out of Eddie’s hands.

“Hey!”

“Oh shush I had to deal with a mob of angry Italians, this is the least you can do.” You slumped down on one of the couches and took a long hit that instantly relaxed your tired muscles.

“I don’t know how you’ve even held this job down for so long.” Eddie said as you passed the blunt back to him.

“No idea. It’s a fucking miracle.” You grabbed a random magazine from the pile and started to flick through the photos of really attractive supermodels.

“How many jobs did you have before this, remind me?”

“Probably like 20.” Graham said as he took a seat next to you.

“Fuck off.” You answered back as you blindly tried to kick him. “At least I tried to go get a job while the rest of you just idle around here like lazy dogs.”

“She does have a point there.” That was a new voice, you perked up and took a peak over your magazine as Karen took a seat on the couch in front of you and held out a glass of wine.

“Thanks. So are we ordering in or…”

“Nope, Billy and Warren said they were going to cook something.” That made you spin around and look at her with a horrified look on your face.

“Please tell me you’re joking.”

“No? Cami went to process some of her film a bit ago and they just volunte-”

“Oh fuck.” You quickly handed her the wine and threw the magazine on the couch before basically flying into the kitchen. Trying to salvage whatever disaster the boys had decided to cook up. Some kind of alien monster most likely.

Y/N: *laughing* Those were some good months. I actually miss those days a lot. I guess everything changed after Billy met Teddy Price at a supermarket. Weird coincidence but I swear on my life that it happened. Well I’m actually trusting Billy’s word on this so who knows?

Graham: Y/N was really happy in those months. I mean she was always happy. Like a ball of fire and positivity.

Karen: I got to know everyone a lot more due to how close we were living together. Y/N and I bonded as well but she mostly avoided me. Probably because of work. She was really busy, even with gigs. Cami and Y/N were basically the ones getting the extra money we needed to pull through each month.

Y/N: Karen said I was avoiding her? I mean… maybe I was. It was a weird time for me. It was also the time I met Daisy. Oh she didn’t tell you? Yeah I met Daisy ages before she joined the band.

Daisy: Y/N told you we met earlier than expected? Well she’s only telling the truth. Y/N was a truly kind hearted soul, she actually was there the night I first played for a live audience.

The girl on stage, Daisy Jones, was absolutely dazzling. You almost felt like a kindred flame was lit up in your heart. So of course you decided to come up to her with a glass of whiskey and a smile.

“Hi sorry to bother you but I just have to say you have an incredible voice.”

“Aww thank you darling. I’m Daisy by the way.”

“Y/N.” The rest of the night was spent around a bottle of whiskey and you also got to meet Simone. The three of you created a comfortable atmosphere around you and so over the painful months of trying to get Teddy to produce the band you kept in touch with the duo. Going out for drinks when none of you were playing gigs or recording.

Y/N: Like I said those were some good months. But I guess every good thing has to come to an end. *A sad smile appears on your face and you turn your face from the camera to quickly wipe your eyes.*

Graham was obviously enamored with Karen. Everyone saw it, everyone knew except for her. Your heart stung every single time he sent her that puppy eyed look. How could you be jealous of your brother?! It’s not like someone as beautiful as her would ever go for someone like you.

You bitterly took another sip of your drink when you felt a presence next to you. Carefully turning your head you were surprised to see Billy. It was his night after all. The night of his wedding. Really you couldn’t believe it.

“Hey? You okay?”

“Yeah.” He most definitely wasn’t and you had an inkling as to why, so you just leaned your head on his shoulder and gave him a one armed hug.

“Just know I will always love you okay. Through thick and thin. I’m your twin so you sure as hell are never getting rid of me.” He let out a wet chuckle before burrowing his face in your hair and giving you a squeeze back.

“I can’t believe I’m going to be a father.”

“You’re going to be a good one, Billy. I’ll make sure of that and Cami will make sure of that.”

“I don’t deserve either of you.”

“Nope don’t you go on saying that Mr. Dunne.” He laughed before pulling away from you and taking a swig of his beer.

“Do you want to be the kid’s godmother?”

“What?!” You looked up at him with widened eyes and a surprised expression on your face.

“Well I kind of talked it over with Cami and well we want you to be the godmother.”

“I’m already going to be the aunt though.”

“So should I tell her you said no…”

“Oh shut up Billy of course I’m saying yes.” You both laughed and he hugged you again. Harder this time.

“It’s all going to be fine.” You said into his shirt, trying to reassure your anxious twin.

“I believe you.”

Y/N: *silence as you anxiously pick your nails* Umm the tour right. I think that was more of the tour from hell. I was basically watching my brother destroy himself and his family. And I was powerless to stop it. So when you feel powerless what do you think we did back then? I took up pills. A secret little habit no one ever knew about.

You carefully tucked Billy into his bed after throwing the groupies out of his room and throwing out all the empty beer bottles. The remnants of cocaine were also swept onto the floor, and just as you were about to close the door you heard a voice.

“Y/N?”

“Yeah Billy?”

“Uh… thanks.”

“Anytime.” You said with a sad smile as a tear ran down your face before closing the hotel door.

“Fuckkkk.” You slumped down against the door and buried your face in your hands. It was this exact same routine. Over and over and over again. What were you going to tell Cami? Would you ever tell her?

“Hey you okay?” You heard that British accent that never failed to make you feel butterflies in your stomach, even if you sat devastated in a random hotel.

“Fine. You?” Quickly wiping away the remnants of tears and standing up so you were at eye level with Karen.

“You sure?”

“Yeah, Karen. No need to worry about me. Have you settled in okay?”

“Right yeah everything is great. I was just about to go for a smoke on the roof care to join me?”

“Sure sounds good.” You dusted off your hands and followed Karen up onto the roof before lighting up one of your cigs.

“Okay now tell me the truth. How are you really feeling?” She asked after an awkward beat of silence.

“Conflicted I guess.”

“About the whole Billy thing?”

“Yeah he’s my brother but… I hate seeing him like this. I don’t know. Shit… this is such a messed up situation isn’t it?”

“It really is. Now just stop thinking about it and watch the stars. That always does the trick with me.”

“Thanks Karen.”

“Anytime.” She sent you a comforting smile and you laid your head in her lap. That constant weight on your shoulders already dissipating by just being around her.

Y/N: A few more shows in Cami came to visit. It was a surprise and honestly I’m pretty sure she knew something was up. I met up with her when I went to do my nightly check up on Billy since I had been at the record store all day.

Camila: I would never blame Y/N for what was going on with Billy. I think she was the one who at least didn’t let him slip off the deep end but I wish she had told me about it.

You didn’t know about Cami’s trip so when you went to check up on Billy suddenly the door swung open and a very pregnant Camila stormed out.

“Cami?” You asked in a strained voice.

“Y/N hey.”

“Look I’m so fucking sorry. I tried to get him to tell you or I would have called-”

“No no I get it. You’re his twin, you will always try to protect him. I gave him an ultimatum.”

“I’m assuming you’re letting him fuck around until the kid is born right?”

“Yeah.”

“I’ll try to make sure he gets better okay?”

“That isn’t-”

“No it is. Now come here. Let me hug my favorite sister in law.” You enveloped Cami in a hug and smoothed your hands across her back as she started sobbing into your shoulder.

“It’s going to be okay. Shhh, it’s all going to be fine. When is your flight?”

“Tomorrow morning.”

“How about you come stay with me until then? That way you don’t have to see Billy or pay for another room.”

“Yeah that sounds good.”

Y/N: Those shows were a disaster. Billy was getting worse and I had no way to stop it. I didn’t try to take away his drugs or the fucking groupies. The one time I tried… no okay he doesn’t even know about that. So the day Julia was born, that wonderful little bundle of joy, Teddy got Billy into rehab. And I became Jules’ godmother. I thought everything was going to get better after that and it did for a while. For everyone else.

Billy: I came out of rehab and I quit the band. I think Graham and Y/N were the only ones who understood why. Y/N got the brunt of my addiction though. She was like a shining beacon but I never realized how much it had affected her…

Y/N: I wasn’t fine.

That stupid green monster called jealousy invaded your veins each time you saw him with her. You should be happy for your brother but it was the complete opposite. Warren was even questioning you as to why he never saw you with anyone, you only brushed off those questions by telling him to fuck off.

Pill numbers were multiplying by the day and as you sat in the recording studio waiting for whatever miracle Teddy thought would save your band you could almost feel the chemicals moving through your blood. You took another swing from the coffee cup in your hand to try and distract yourself from how big Karen’s smile was as she looked at Graham.

Falling for a straight girl. What an fucking cliche.

“Can I get a glass of milk and a whiskey? Or just a whiskey if you don’t have milk. Or just milk if you don’t have whiskey?” Now that was a familiar voice. You perked up from your little alcove in the recording room to see that chaotic ball of pure energy which belonged to one of your best friends. Daisy Jones was in the house.

“DAISY JONES? Do my eyes deceive me?” You rushed up and enveloped her in your arms. “Why didn’t you tell me that you were coming?”

“Well I didn’t know until last night.”

“You look incredible, I love this shirt.” She smiled and did a little twirl to show off the buttondown.

“Stop, now you look absolutely stunning. Where did you manage to find a coat like this?”

Karen: I remember feeling a strange kind of anger the day we met Daisy Jones. It wasn’t directed at her, it’s just… I don’t think it really clicked that Y/N had a life outside the one I saw her in.

Graham: It wasn’t really a surprise, Y/N was friends with everyone. Did she tell you about that mafia thing?

“You guys done with this little reunion cause we need to get on with it.”

“Stop being such an asshole Billy. But yeah we should probably get this show on the road.” You made your way into the soundbooth with the rest of the band after giving Daisy one more squeeze and a comforting smile.

“So how do you know Daisy?” Karen whispered in your ear, making you jump. She was way closer than you had anticipated.

“Oh I went to one of her shows. We got to know each other after, that’s how I met Simone as well. Where do you think I disappear off to all these nights?” That response elicited a slightly guilty look on Karen’s face.

“I always thought you were in your room. I guess I’ve just never seen you sneak out.” Wow, you hadn’t realized how good you had gotten at hiding your little bad habits.

“Hmm.” You hummed back and then turned to look at your brother and Daisy, nervously picking at your nails. Oh god why did you tell Karen that. She now thinks you’re some kind of crazy party girl.

The rest of the recording session was kind of a mess. You suddenly realized why you had been so entranced by Daisy when you first met her. She reminded you so much of your twin. You had felt that instant connection because you had the same connection with Billy. Their personalities bashed against each other because they fit so well together.

Y/N: I think we all noticed the Daisy and Billy thing. But I was just scared. I was scared for Billy and for Daisy. I care for them so so much but I don’t think I could have predicted what all came next. I had an inkling though. And that is what scared me.

You had joined Karen when she basically dragged you to go to the record store with her. Ever since your admission about your nights out it seemed as if she wanted to spend more and more time with you. Not that you minded.

You stood next to her as you sifted through the rows of different music selections. You weren’t particularly looking for anything but were looking out for some new stuff. It was always interesting to hear new sounds when suddenly you heard the girl at the till.

“Is this the one with ‘Look At Us Now’?” You exchanged glances with Karen with giddy smiles starting to paint your faces. No fucking way.

“Oh shoot I don’t think I have enough.” Karen was about to pull out some money but you stilled her hand by grabbing her wrist. Winking at her you grabbed a 5 dollar bill from your jacket pocket and put it on top of the record. Your record.

“Here.”

“Oh thanks.”

“No problem.” You linked arms with Karen before heading out of the store letting out giggles.

You took a seat next to Julia as you fed her little pieces of food whilst cooing at her. Billy was once again complaining about the song and Cami was trying to calm him down.

“Has anyone looked through the mail recently?”

“Oh fuck sorry I meant to sift through those last night. Mia culpa and all that.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Karen sent you a soft smile before her face turned to shock as she stared at the envelopes. “Does anyone know what these are?”

“No way.” You quickly snatched the letter that was addressed to you from her hands and started dancing around the kitchen. “Look Jules, aunty has got some money now.”

Y/N: The first thing I bought… Karen tried to get me to buy stock. But no… I umm I bought a motorcycle.

Graham: Okay so one thing you need to know about my sister is that she has like zero self preservation.

Y/N: Graham said that?! Oh that little shit. That isn’t true. I got a helmet too. That bike basically became my baby.

You were sitting out on the balcony after Billy and Cami moved out. Which meant you could finally do drugs freely, well not that freely but that’s beside the point. You were lying on the floor staring at the stars as Warren went on and on about how he and the canyon were connected. It was strangely funny in your drugged out state that you burst out laughing. Pills and psychedelics might not have been the best combination.

In your defense you thought you were about to go to bed so you took a combination of sleeping and pain pills but then Karen dragged you upstairs to try out whatever this thing was. And all in all you were having a great time until it happened.

You peaked through your fingers to see Karen’s hand on Graham’s chest. It was just against his heart. Like she was metaphorically holding his heart in her hand but in that moment it felt like it was your heart that she had just crushed into a pulp.

So you just closed your eyes and let the drugs overtake your senses. Letting them all wash away that pain of heartbreak.

Y/N: Hawaii was incredible. Billy was an asshole. And Daisy shined. I think that’s about all I can remember from that time. *a tight smile appears on your face* People never notice things until they come to the surface. I hid things very well for a long time.

Cami had invited you to the housewarming party and when you were having a catch up with Daisy in her hotel’s pool you realized she was too. You hadn’t told her about the whole being a lesbian thing, not that you didn’t trust her but you didn’t want her to treat you differently. You were just scared of what she would see in you even if she had fully accepted Simone.

Simone had gone to New York because of a woman. Simone who was the only person who knew you liked women. Simone the glue that held Daisy together. You both missed her deeply and that is why you were hanging out with Daisy at the pool.

So on the night of the housewarming, Daisy’s arms were wrapped around your waist with a pineapple balancing in your lap as you sped through the streets of LA until you arrived at the house.

Daisy was the first to hop off before taking off her helmet and handing it to you. You did the same and took the keys out of the ignition before following Daisy inside. You weaved through the crowds with her arm around your shoulders when Cami spotted the two of you.

“Daisy you came! And with Y/N. Now this is a strange development.”

“You didn’t mention me before? I am offended.”

“Well it’s not my fault it’s so hard to describe someone so radiant. I’m going to go check up on Billy. It’s good to see you, Cami.”

“We need to see each other more often Y/N. Jules has been missing you.”

“Oh I bet.” You gave her a smile before bounding over and enveloping Billy in a bear hug. “How is my favorite twin doing?”

“Hi Y/N, it’s good to see you too. What’s got you so energetic today?”

“Wow I can’t just be excited to see my brother?” In reality, you had sneaked some of Daisy’s cocaine stash while she was in the bathroom. It was your first time on the drug and you suddenly realized how Billy got addicted to this stuff. You hadn’t felt this good in ages.

“No no that’s not at all what I’ve been saying. How have you been?”

“Good. I’ve missed having you and Cami around.”

“No you haven’t.” He said with a conspiratorial smile on his face.

“We haven’t been separated before Billy before I miss having my twin around.” That second the mask slipped, the mask that said I’m fine.

“Y/N?” 

“I umm I’m going to get myself a drink. See you later Billy.” You slipped out of his grasp and grabbed a glass of whiskey and made your way to the living room where you saw Graham flirting with some blonde. Okay now that is a strange development. You took a seat next to a confused looking Karen on one of the couches.

“You okay?”

“Oh hey you came.”

“That I did. So what’s going on?”

“Did you know that Graham was in love with me?” That made you spit out the remaining whiskey in your mouth.

“What?” You said after coughing for a solid minute.

“Graham told me he wanted to be with me.”

“And you said?”

“No obviously.”

“Oh okay.” That stupid sentence shouldn’t have made you fill up with hope but it did.

“So you don’t have any comments?”

“I mean what do you want me to say?”

“I don’t know.”

“Right I umm I’m going to leave you alone then.”

You spent the night at Cami and Billy’s house, they had already set out the spare room for you since Billy didn’t want you driving on that vehicle of death as he liked to call it in the middle of the night.

Y/N: The first day that we were officially Daisy Jones & The Six couldn’t have started anymore disastrously. I was finally starting to cut back on pills because after the cocaine inci-

Interviewer: Sorry to interrupt but uh what was the cocaine incident?

Y/N: *a pained look overcame your face* I don’t think you want to hear about this.

Interviewer: I want to know it all.

Y/N: Right so I guess you will be the second person to ever know the story about the cocaine incident. The first was the doctor who found me overdosing in a park. It had become a habit to swipe Daisy’s coke stash. So on that night I had been adventurous and took a little more than usual. That ended up with me on a park bench with foam coming out of my mouth. Mark found me after a shift, he basically revived me by throwing me in a lake and getting me to his house. There he was able to flush the drugs from my system. I made him promise the next morning to never tell anyone and that was that. I don’t remember much of the encounter but I stopped the majority of the drugs after that.

Interviewer: I’m sorr-

Y/N: *with tears rolling down your face* Don’t be sorry. I’m alive and yeah it was probably not a good idea to not have told anyone but I was one of those people who didn’t believe in weaknesses. Anyways, I was kind of going through a big withdrawal period during that first session. Teddy was a fucking saviour as always and got Daisy and Billy to go write a song. I spent my day cruising around the streets of LA on my bike trying to fight off a killer migraine.

You arrived home before Warren and Eddie did and what greeted you was the sounds of moaning. So you quickly slipped into the back and took a peek into the living room. The sight on the couch made your heart split in two. Karen and your brother…

You soundlessly turned and closed the backdoor before quickly wiping the tears that started to form at the sight of Warren and Eddie.

“Where have you two been all day?”

“We could ask you the same question.”

“Well I was at the garage for a bit and then I went to the hills and cruised around. And by the popcorn I’m guessing you went to see Rollerball again.”

“Damn right sister.” You laughed and followed them inside when you heard the phone ringing.

“Is anyone going to get that?” You asked as you walked into the living room, looking at Karen and Graham who looked very disheveled. 

“Uh yeah.”

Y/N: That was the first time we heard Let Me Down Easy. And it was incredible… but Daisy and Billy. They realized that connection. And that hug at the end of the session. Well it said it all.

Interviewer: So did you notice anything different about Y/N around the time you recorded Aurora?

Billy: Uh not really? I was kind of immersed in the writing process of it all. Why? Did she say something?

Graham: She was more reserved I guess. I barely saw her other than in recording sessions and at home. I was kind of busy too with uh I guess you could call it love.

Karen: Yeah she was avoiding me. I wanted to be around her a bunch but Graham was giving me something I always wanted. And she was more tired. Like almost lethargic.

Warren: Not really? She spent a lot more time with me though. We discussed movies a lot together.

Eddie: She looked exhausted a lot of the time. Wait, why are you asking this?

Y/N: I was mentally drained during that time. I was avoiding Karen and Graham because of obvious reasons. I tried to date a few guys. That was a bad time. Me and men don’t go well together but uh I was grieving a lot and on top of that I was heartbroken. I wasn’t in the greatest place and it kind of fucked with me.

Daisy: I wasn’t spending as much time with Y/N as I probably should have been.

Y/N: After the album was finished and everyone went their separate ways, I went to a rehab center in Switzerland. The only person who knew was Teddy. I was an insanely secretive person but I needed to have someone know where I was. Teddy was like a father to me and he helped with everything.

Billy: I kind of freaked when I realized that no one knew where either Daisy or my sister were. Teddy had no idea where Daisy was but he told me Y/N went on a trip. That she would be back in a month and she was. But she was different. I think that was when I realized how fucking miserable she must have been while I was trying to deal with all my shit.

Y/N: Rehab was the best thing I could have ever done. I went back home and I moved out to this little apartment which was next to this secret beach. I finally felt so much better. I remember that day when I came to collect all my shit from my old room. I had bought a mustang when I left the airport. My beloved car.

You took a deep breath before cutting the ignition of your car and stepping into the house that held so many memories. So much heartbreak.

“Y/N holy shit you’re back.” Warren grabbed you and pulled you into a bear hug which everyone quickly joined once they realized who had stepped through their front door.

“Where the hell have you been?” Karen asked as she looked at you with a deep worry in her eyes.

“I uh went to rehab.” Their shocked faces made you burst out laughing. “Oh god I needed that, it has been a somber few days.”

“Why did you even go to rehab?”

“I needed to go away and get shit straightened out. Now how have all of you been?” You spent the rest of the afternoon catching up and drinking ginger beer while everyone drank regular alcohol. When you broke the news that you were going to move out it didn’t really faze anyone since Warren had basically permanently moved into his houseboat. That crush you had for Karen was still there but you were happy for your little brother. Wow, you could finally say that truthfully in your head.

“I’m sorry I didn’t notice.” Karen said as she helped you pack up some of your valuables.

“Notice what?”

“How much you were struggling.”

“Karen, it’s okay. Plus I know you were busy having a boyfriend.” You forced out a smile before placing another one of your numerous trinkets into your suitcase.

“How did you know?” Karen had an almost guilty look on her face that made you look at her with a confused expression.

“I’ve known for ages. I’m not as clueless as the other idiots.”

“And how do you feel about it?”

“Well I’m happy for you of course. Graham really likes you.”

“Is that it?”

“What else do you want me to say?”

“I… thanks.”

“No problem. Thanks for helping with packing.” After all that was finished you put everything in the trunk with the help of Warren.

“When the hell did you get a Mustang?”

“Well I needed an extra car since my bike wouldn’t hold all my stuff. I got her this morning.”

“I always did appreciate your taste in cars.” You both laughed and exchanged a hug.

“Take care of yourself Warren. I’ll see you at the meeting on Monday.”

“You too. You heading home?”

“Nah I’m going to check in with Billy first.”

“Okay. Bye Y/N.”

“Bye Warren.” You waved at the group who had collected at the front porch before speeding off in the direction of your twin’s house.

You stood in front of the door before finally having the courage to knock. The door was immediately swung open by Camila.

“Oh my god you’re here. Billy get down here!” Cami yelled into the house before grabbing you and squeezing you into a hug.

“Are you okay? Teddy said you were on a trip but we were worried.” All of a sudden Billy appeared at the door carrying Julia and having the most relieved smile on his face.

“Oh Y/N. Come here.”

“Yes, come in. I’ll get you some tea.” Billy put down Jules before he enveloped you in that familiar embrace. God you had missed him. Julia came over and hugged your leg, making you laugh as you picked her up.

“Hey there Jules. You’ve gotten so big.”

“Where were you?” Billy asked as you took a seat on the couch as Julia nestled into your chest.

“Switzerland. I wanted to tell you but I really didn’t want to disappoint you, Billy.”

“What do you mean?”

“I had to go to rehab. I know I should have talked to you-”

“No no, I get it. I’m so fucking sorry I wasn’t there for you. You deserve someone better than me as a brother. Cause I sure as hell don’t deserve you.”

“Shut up, Billy. You’re my twin and I’ll love you to the ends of the earth.”

The rest of the night was spent in tears and laughs. You finally spent some much needed time with your other half. Being a twin meant you had a companion for life but it hadn’t felt like that for a while.

Y/N: I spent most of the tour around Billy. We shared the separate bus with Graham but he usually ended up staying over at Daisy’s bus. And Nicky well Nicky was a horrible fucking person and I noticed how much of a hold he had over Daisy. I felt powerless all over again. I tried to talk to her about it but she wouldn’t listen to anyone. I understood that feeling. I was that person only a few months ago.

Daisy: Y/N and Billy tried. Y/N tried to help so much that now that I think back on it she might have been the only thing keeping me from really surrendering myself to Nicky.

Y/N: Billy found her overdosed in the bathroom one night. That kind of changed everything for Daisy. Oh and Karen and Graham became official.

You were snuggled up next to Billy as you watched a random movie. Ginger beer was sitting in front of you and popcorn littered the bus's couch. You had spent the past few nights crying yourself to sleep. As if that would change the fact that Karen was in love with your little brother.

Then the bus’s door unlocked and in walked Daisy Jones. You felt Billy instantly perk up and shut off the tv. Billy Dunne was in love with Daisy Jones and you were powerless to do anything. Billy couldn’t admit it to himself but you knew the truth. You had known the man since the second he was born. 

“Would it be okay if I slept here tonight?”

“Of course Daisy. I’ll leave you guys to it.” You gave your brother a quick nudge before disappearing into the bunk section. Snuggled under the covers you drifted off into dreamland with the sound of their intermingling voices in the background.

Y/N: When Teddy nearly died, it felt like the world stopped. I even went to a chapel. I couldn’t have him leave us just yet.

You were kneeling in one of the pews of the hospital chapel. Praying and just begging God to let him live. You would do anything if you could just have him back.

When you got the news that he was going to be fine, you went into the room before Billy did. He understood the importance of that to you.

“Hey old man. I’m glad you’re not dead yet.”

“You ain’t getting rid of me that easily.” That was when Teddy noticed your tear tracks. “ Oh sweetheart.”

“Can’t have you dying on me okay?”

“I won’t. I promise you.”

Y/N: Pittsburgh never felt like a home to me. LA had become that. At least I didn’t feel judged in every corner of the town. But I missed my mother.

The night before you were meant to leave for Pittsburgh you heard a soft knock on your hotel room door. Rising from your position on the bed, you threw your journal and pen back into the covers and padded over to the door. And there stood Karen. As beautiful as ever but with tears running down her face.

“Kare? What’s going on?” She looked into your eyes and suddenly you knew. Oh she was pregnant.

“I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.” She visibly brightened a little before she delved into your arms and you held her through the night. Selfishly feeling happy that she was spending the night in your arms instead of your brother’s.

You awkwardly sat at the edge of your mother’s backyard. Taking sips of a glass of lemonade as you leaned your head on Karen’s shoulder.

“What’s going on?” You saw Cami walk up to the both of you with a concerned look on her face. You twisted your head to look up at Karen as she gave Cami a sad smile. Cami’s face morphed into something concerned before she gave you both a hug.

“I’m sorry.”

“Hey I’ll leave you two to discuss for a bit, okay?”

“Yeah I’ll see you later honey.” Karen’s little nickname for you made your heart flutter as you gave them both a smile before making your way to where Billy was talking to Chuck. The fucking dentist. You put your hands over your twin’s eyes and leaned next to his head.

“Guess who?” You asked, trying to deepen your voice as much as possible.

“Hmm I don’t know. Who could it be? I’m thinking it’s Y/N.”

“Spoilsport. Hey Chuck.” You made your way to stand next to Billy as he let out a chuckle at your childish antics.

“Hey Y/N. You look good.”

“Why thank you. I’m wearing Dior.” You gave him a slightly cutting smile before taking another sip of lemonade.

Warren: Y/N could be incredibly cutthroat when she wanted to. One of the best things about her.

Y/N: The Pittsburgh show went well. It was weird being home again. But the crowd was insane and Daisy and Billy well… they were Daisy and Billy.

The next morning after the show you went to the clinic with Cami and Karen. You held her hand during the procedure and gave her a comforting smile throughout it. She didn’t want pity or sadness and you knew that. You were always going to be there for her. Even if it was only as a friend.

Y/N: In all honesty, I thought everything was going great. Obviously I could see the tension between Daisy and Billy, I was literally living with them. I felt like a third wheel a lot of the time.

You could feel the palpable tension in the air as you played through the set. Billy looked heartbroken but also fucking elated, Daisy looked like she was having the time of her life, Eddie had a black eye, Graham couldn’t even look at Karen, Karen looked devastated but she kept sneaking glances your way, Warren looked like well Warren looked normal and you just did what you normally did, you observed. You mostly observed Karen because she looked really fucking hot in that outfit.

Then the set ended. Billy ran off to chase Camila and Daisy kept on singing. You knew it was the end. So before you went backstage you looked out onto the crowd one last time and sent them a kiss with a sad smile.

You were packing up your guitar when you felt a warm hand on your shoulder. You turned around to see Karen. In all her glory with a bright smile on her face.

“You don’t know how long I’ve wanted to do this. I’m sorry it took so long for me to realize it.” Then she pulled you into a kiss. A kiss that reminded you of all of the things you had gone through since the start of the band. A kiss that felt like that pulsating crowd. A kiss that felt like pure unadulterated love.

“Wow Karen Sirko I didn’t know you had that in you.”

“Well Y/N Dunne I can’t wait to live out life with you.” You laughed before grabbing her and pulling her into a deeper kiss than before.

Daisy watched on as one of her favorite people in the world finally got her happy ending. And she felt calm for the first time in a while.

Karen: I wasn’t being completely honest with Graham for our entire relationship. I was literally in love with his sister throughout most of it but I didn’t know that I was. Until that night she just held me while I cried about being pregnant.

Y/N: *entwining your hand with Karen’s as the camera pans to allow you into frame* Karen is the only person I could ever imagine a life with. We live out in the mountains and I became a writer. And this incredible woman right here makes some of the best music out there.

Karen: Now you’re exaggerating.

Y/N: Shh I’m having a moment. So yeah Jules that’s how this whole thing has come to pass. I wouldn’t have changed one bit, it all led me to being with this beautiful woman whom I love with my entire being.

Julia: You know I think you’re like one of the coolest people ever right?

Y/N: Aww I love you so much kid. You’re definitely one of my favorite nieces, don’t tell Graham’s kids. *the camera cuts as you and Karen let out loud laughs*

THE END.

taglist: @yesshewrites1

#daisy jones and the six #billy dunne #graham dunne #karen sirko #daisy jones #camila dunne #warren rojas #warren rhodes #eddie roundtree #taylor jenkins reid #amazon prime #daisy jones and the six imagine #djats fanfic #djats #daisy jones and the six x reader #karen sirko x reader #karen karen #karen sirko one shot #suki waterhouse #karen sirko imagine #karen karen x reader

[saccharineomens]

A small Chainsaw Man Analysis

They're referencing this post:

(Sorry i can't respond to your ask directly, tumblr kept crashing)

LMAO ok Anon you win but I can’t promise this will be very articulate or coherent

Ok so when I first heard about Chainsaw Man I heard it was The Manga Of All Time and the anime has been Majorly Hyped and Everyone Loves It so I was curious. Then I went and watched the anime and I was like ‘huh ok I mean. It’s good but it’s not like mindblowing.’

Then I read the manga all the way to the end of part 1 and I understood.

So the world of Chainsaw Man is set in a Fucking Bleak reality. Like, overwhelmingly so. The fact that devils exist and can murder humans on a whim and it’s basically treated as an unavoidable inconvenience because how the hell can you stop them, really, when they’re functionally immortal? The best you can do is kill them, send them to Hell, and hope they don’t die there and revive back on Earth. The protagonist is a 16 year old orphan who sold parts of his body to pay off a “noodle incident” debt inherited from his father, and then the kid was murdered by the yakuza he owed money to because they decided they liked devils, actually, and didn’t want him around killing them. In CHAPTER ONE. Why would anyone enjoy reading about a story set in a world like this?

Because of Aki, and Power, and the family Denji created with them. It takes a while for the ball to get rolling in the story, because they’re strangers at the beginning, but any manga reader is gonna know what I mean when I talk about how they love each other. Denji comes across as a sex-obsessed, horny teen, but that’s just because he craves emotional intimacy and sex is the only way he thinks he could get it. The truth is that his shower/bath with Power was the exact kind of vulnerability and intimacy he was craving, and it WASN’T sexy. The narrative didn’t treat it as sexy. Denji even notes that it wasn’t sexy, to his surprise, but it was nice to be able to be vulnerable with another person. Then there’s Aki, who imprinted on Denji and Power so hard he straight-up was considering quitting being a devil hunter so he could just live a normal life with his new family. He was willing to abandon his obsession with the gun devil, something that he’d been driving his will to live for years, for them. It was Himeno’s death and the letter he read that made him realize that the life of a country mouse might not be so bad, if it’s with the people he loves. (I know that’s a loaded sentence out of context but manga readers know what I mean when I bring up the country mouse, right)

I bring all of this up to show how even in a grim, dark, depressing world like Chainsaw Man, there is hope; and that hope comes in the form of love. Love in a general, not romantic, sense. Love of having toast and jam for breakfast, love of a movie, love of a family.

Now, to Makima.

Makima is Really Fucking Goddamn Powerful. She is literally reality breaking, almost as much as Chainsawman. (For the purposes of this essay, I’m referring to Pochita/Chainsawman and Denji as separate entities.) Makima is able to control anyone so long as she feels she has power over them, and she has a contract with the fucking Prime Minister. That’s a terrifying power. She’s literally the manifestation of the fear of being controlled.

And that’s a lonely existence.

Pochita/Chainsawman says it himself. When you’re so powerful, you struggle to make connections with people. Either they worship you and put you on a pedestal, or they fear you. You can’t get close to anyone, no matter how hard you try. The only way Pochita was able to do so was because Denji had no idea who Chainsawman was.

Makima doesn’t show this emotional weakness of hers, because it directly opposes her powers. If people saw her as needing connections with other people, they wouldn’t respect/fear her, and she would literally become weaker as a result. (The same way that as Chainsawman becomes more beloved by the general populace as a Hero, he becomes weaker.) But there’s a point where we, the audience, get to see this side of her. In her date with Denji.

Quick recap (of one of the best chapters in the whole manga, thematically): Denji and Makima go on a date at a movie theater. They sit and watch like six movies in a row over the course of the day. The first five are packed with people and are funny/entertaining, but not very deep. Neither Denji nor Makima are very impressed with these. Then…I’ll just post the comic here.

The final movie they see is more of an indie arthouse film. Most importantly, it shares an intimate, vulnerable moment between two people who hug. Denji cries because he sees this thing he craves, as I’ve elaborated on. Then he looks over and sees that Makima is also crying. We already know why, as Pochita said: she is unable to get close to anyone, due to the nature of her powers and the nature of her being a devil. Because of this, Makima craves connections with other people.

Makima straight up tells the audience why she’s doing the things she’s doing. If she has control over Chainsawman, she can have him eat other devils and create a world where those fears never existed. She truly, honestly believes this would make a happier life for humans. But the problem with that mentality is that in a world without bad things, in a world without fear…there’s no good things, either. How do you tell how “good” a good thing is, if you have nothing to compare it against? How can you tell that one in five movies is “good”, if you don’t experience the other four?

Why would anyone enjoy reading about a story set in a world like this? Because despite all of the horrible things that happens, love exists. It shows up over and over and over again. Love exists. It was there. It mattered. It was worth fighting for.

That brings me to the conversation between Makima and Denji I love so much, and why the end of Part 1 works so well.

Makima thinks that a world without bad movies fear would be better. She thinks that in this world, she could be loved. She thinks that in this world, humans could be happy forever because they never suffer hardship.

And Denji knows for a fact that that's wrong, because without bad movies, the good movies don't stand out. You can't say that jam and toast is a great breakfast if all you've ever eaten is jam and toast for breakfast.

And that's why Makima is tragic (because she's never experienced the love that Denji has, and never experienced the hardships he has), and that's why Makima is wrong.

And all of this, the whole conflict of the story, is summed up in three lines between Denji and Makima in a graveyard. It's perfect.

#it's also why i love makima. she's such a great character #chainsaw man #chainsaw man spoilers #chainsaw man analysis #csm #csm spoilers #makima #denji #denji hayakawa #op #axbox #anon

[goldrushenthusiast]

Analysis on Snow and Lucy Gray’s relationship, as requested by @mym00nagedaydr3am :).

They definitely loved each other, though their reasons for it may have been out of their control, and it wasn’t true love. That’s the best way I can put it.

Coriolanus Snow- he talked about how he had thought about his future wife before, and how nobody but Persephone the cannibal was really that appealing to him. In drops Lucy Gray. She immediately captured his -and everyone else’s- attention, and in the first thirty minutes of knowing him she saved his life and his reputation. That definitely leaves a mark.

Coriolanus is drawn to things that are unlike the ordinary. We know this because of how he reacts to Katniss and Peeta’s fire costume, and how he reacts to a bunch of their stunts in general. I’m not as huge a hunger game fan as bosas though, so I can’t speak much on that. But, I do know Coriolanus thought (rightfully) about how people from district 12 were “stunted, joint swollen, and always died within the first 5 minutes.” (the beginning of chapter 2). He was surprised by Lucy Gray because she was clean, she had makeup on, and she made an excellent first impression (saving his life & reputation).

This was only amplified further by the fact that Lucy Gray sat down with him, and stood up for herself by demanding he believe she could win it. Coriolanus didn’t see that coming. He fully believed that his tribute would be terrible, and the shock of her not being so gave Coriolanus a bit of a boost in falling in love. He expected the worst, got the best, and the room in the middle had to be filled with love.  

I’d mention how Coriolanus also sees Lucy Gray as his property, and how he’s been raised with that mindset, but tbh that whole “she’s mine, she belonged to me, blah blah blah” part of their relationship is just so weird and off-putting, though it does make sense for his character. Lucy Gray would not be having that though, lmao. 

Now, Lucy Gray- she had just gotten out of a bad relationship, and her ex having sentenced her nearly to death is a great way to move on quickly! 

Lucy Gray likes courage, and bravery. I can’t find any exact quotes at the moment, but Lucy Gray did thank Coriolanus for protecting her & the covey from Mayfair when he killed her at the hob even though it was hard for him. The act of even showing up to the station, how it was a test to see how willing he was, also proves this. 

Lucy Gray also values family, above all else. She tries to make goats milk for Maude Ivory to “bring a bit of happy into her life.” She says the only thing she would miss would be them when she left district 12. Coriolanus accepts her family, and her “crazy” stories about them not being really district fairly quickly. She definitely appreciated that.

Not going to lie, at the beginning, Lucy Gray probably was only flirting to intrigue Coriolanus. In chapter 25, she says “Sure, I flirt with anybody. It’s part of my job.” I believe she still has this mindset when she arrives at the capitol. She is used to living by her charms (and voice), and so that’s exactly what she does. Coriolanus actually treats her with respect, and as a person, opposed to the other inmates & their mentors, so he also leaves quite the good impression on her. 

Their relationship in district 12 takes a different turn, though. At the beginning, it’s fine. She is overjoyed to see him, and finds it very romantic. “You found me.” “You knew I would.” things like that get said to each other often in the beginning. But soon things change. They have the fight about their dads being killed by the other, which I believe is fundamental to their relationship. Lucy Gray thinks that capitol people are all terrible, and by the way Coriolanus jumps straight to defense tells her a lot about him. 

Of course, they make up (and out), and Lucy Gray is very appreciative of how Coriolanus treats Maude Ivory and his “clear” devotion to his friend. I’m quite sure Coriolanus’ relationship with Sejanus was actually quite a bonus point in their own, so when she realized that Coriolanus betrayed him, she realized he could betray her too. 

That’s another thing about Lucy Gray. Trust. She never had it with Billy Taupe, and she thought she had it with Coriolanus, but she actually didn’t. It’s very important to her, so when she realized he had lied to her, she couldn’t just move on from that. 

That’s another one of the most interesting aspects of both of them. How quickly they fell out of love, and towards hate and murder. When Lucy Gray realized that Coriolanus killed Sejanus, and that he’d have no qualms about staying in district 12 now that he got rid of the guns, she knew she had been betrayed. When Coriolanus realized Lucy Gray knew, he easily started shooting at her, albeit not before trying to at least talk. This goes to show how they were both raised. Coriolanus to fend for himself, Lucy Gray to think about what her relationships with everyone around her mean and represent. 

Coriolanus also says that he was “beginning to sympathize with Billy Taupe.” This clearly shows that the second that his relationship with her was over, that he could no longer benefit from it, he turned on her. He said “hell no!” and got out of there with a mind that only amplified what he now thought of her. Vicious, cutthroat, and manipulative, all things he also was. Coriolanus’ victim mindset is also very interesting tbh. 

In the end, I’m very sure Lucy Gray lived. She’s smarter than a lot of people give her credit for, especially Coriolanus (until the last few pages). They wouldn’t have worked out long term, due to their differences in what family meant, what the capitol meant, and just in general how different they were, but just them being together probably changed both their lives. Coriolanus’ for the better, Lucy Gray’s for the worst, which actually represents a lot of what happens in their other relationships (Snow lands on top, Lucy Gray is forgotten.) 

That just made me remember! Lucy Gray’s ballad! A stroke of GENIUS writing. How Lucy gray mysteriously vanishes in the blizzard, how her parents don’t realize how far she is gone until it is too late, how she leaves no trace except in the middle of a BRIDGE, because that’s what they were to each other. A bridge to the other’s life. I might have to make a separate post about this stupid ballad, but yeah. 

If you read this all THANK YOU!! It means a lot :). If not, I don’t blame you, this is probably my longest tumblr post so far lol. I just find this whole book so fascinating. 

#ballad of songbirds and snakes #bosas #suzanne collins #hunger games #hunger games prequel #me posting abt hunger games??? #told yall i love this book a lot #Coriolanus/ Lucy Gray #coriolanus snow #sejnaus plinth #lucy gray baird

[nickfowlerrr]

taking care

pairing: soft!dark nick fowler x curvy!reader

warnings: innocent/naïve reader. violence. mentions of blood. mean!nick. mentions of injury. minor character death. smut. choking. gun violence. pet names. hair pulling. spanking. i think i’m missing stuff so please let me know if you think anything else should be tagged!

words: 7.4k

notes: this fic has been sitting in my drafts for a couple weeks and i haven’t reread it in a while so apologies for any errors. genuinely idk where this story went and i know i didn’t bother trying to make it make much sense - it was really just an excuse to write nick fowler smut and then this all just kinda came along with it lmao. also - can i just say that i am big anti baths but honestly, i’d get in a tub with this man any day of the week 😙

i feel like, by now, we should all know not to expect well written endings from me and this fic is no exception. idk man lol

as always feedback and comments are always welcome. thank you for reading and reblogging 💜

“I really wanted to trust you, sweetheart,” he said, sounding disappointed as he stared down at you. “I was so sure I could trust you.”

“What?” you said, taken aback by his words as you stared up at him from where you were made to kneel in between his legs. “You..you can. You know you can,” you continued, trying to hide your hurt though you were sure it was written clear as day on your face.

His hand was caressing your cheek softly as his eyes continued to gaze stoically into yours - giving nothing away.

When you had gotten home, after putting away the groceries in the kitchen, you found him in the den. He was just sitting in his chair near the fireplace- the glow of the flames illuminating him and accentuating the sharpness of his facial structure. He sat there, almost unmoving - looking like a work of art.

You were going to call to him, but were instead momentarily stunned by the sight of him before his clear, blazing blue eyes suddenly shot to yours as he heard you enter. His gaze froze you to your spot with the chill it sent through you. He stared at you a moment before speaking.

“Come here, princess,” he called to you.

You blinked at him before making your way over. You had heard that pet name many times before, but something about the way he said it was different now. It sounded wrong, cold. So unlike the wickedly sweet way it normally sounded coming from his lips.

When you were stood right before him, he grabbed your hands in his and pulled you down, urging you to lower yourself onto your knees before him.

To say you were confused at his words would be an understatement. You had been with Nick for the past two years and had started living together just around the first. He had moved you into his home with him a few months shy of your one year anniversary, promising you it would be perfect. And the place itself was perfect. It was in a newer, quite expensive, neighborhood with few neighbors living in the houses near his.

And his house was amazing. High tech and as luxury as you had ever seen in person. You had no qualms about the place you’d be moving to, you were just a little trepidatious, worried things were moving too fast. But of course, Nick convinced you it wasn’t too soon, that when you loved like you loved one another, these things could never be rushed. Not when it was always meant to be. You’d get to spend more time together, you’d save money on rent, and he’d be able to keep an eye on you - to keep you even safer.

You knew Nick’s line of work was dangerous, but you never felt worried about something bad happening to you. You knew he’d never let that happen. You were always his top priority, and had been since the day he first laid eyes on you. Rather, your concerns were in regards to his safety. When he would come home after long weeks away, you finally felt like you’d be able to breathe again. He’d always call or message when he could, but of course you’d still worry. Especially on occasions when he’d get home bloody and bruised. Sometimes you thought it hurt you more than him. But you were always there waiting for him. Always there to patch him up and take care of him when he needed you. And you always would be. You’d promised him as much.

You were closer to Nick than you had ever been with anyone and you’d never felt such an intense connection the way you did with him. You never knew how deep love could be before you met him. You would trust him with your life. You did trust him with your life. And after all this time, you thought he felt the same.

But apparently not.

You weren’t sure what had come over him or what exactly brought this on, but his current behavior was unsettling to say the least. You felt like he was keenly watching every little movement you made and taking note of each reaction you had as he stared at you. Looking for some sort of tell, something that would betray your innocence. But what did he think you were guilty of?

Whatever it was, he wouldn’t find anything. You hadn’t done anything to cause him to question his trust in you, you were sure of it.

“You don’t have to lie, sweetheart. There’s no point now, anyway,” he said as his fingers ghosted along your cheek.

“Nick, I swear,” you said, shaking your head in confusion. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.

What are you trying to accuse me of?”, your hurt even more evident now, “I haven’t done anything wrong,” you insisted earnestly.

It was only when he brushed his knuckles along your cheek that you dared to move. You gingerly grabbed his hand in yours and as you pulled it down to hold it, you then saw the blood and bruising. You looked up at him, eyes wide as you finally took his appearance in more closely. You noticed what appeared to be dried blood stains on his crisp white shirt, but as you scanned his face to see if he was hurt, you found no sign of injury. So the blood wasn’t his.. The only give away he was injured at all was his hand. No, hands, you realized as you pulled away only slightly to run your eyes over him again, needing to be sure he wasn’t hurt, before you noticed the bloody knuckles on his left hand, matching his right.

You weren’t new to seeing Nick like this, but you were normally more prepared. If he was due home from a mission, you knew what to expect. You had time to prepare and steel yourself against the sight of him possibly walking through the door wounded and bloody. He wasn’t normally a hands on kind of guy. He preferred to avoid hand to hand combat when he could, “less messy,” he’d say. But from the looks of him, it seemed he had been in some kind of altercation. You just couldn’t think of how that would have happened in the few hours you had been out. It’s not like he had been gone on an assignment, he hadn’t had any work since he came back last week. So when did this happen? Why did this happen? Why was he sitting here looking the way he was? Treating you like you were in on some conspiracy against him.

“Princess,” he tutted as his eyes burned into yours and his expression grew harsher. Your hand in his, being squeezed tighter. “You’re gonna need to stop lying to me, before I get even more upset.”

“I’m not lying,” you stressed again. “Please - please, just tell me what’s wrong. What happened?”

“You really thought I wouldn’t notice the little hushed conversations you’d have with him every time you’d go out?” He dropped your hand from his and you moved further back from him as he leaned closer to your face, scrutinizing every emotion that passed your eyes. His question served only to confuse you further because you really, truly had no idea what he was talking about or to whom he was referring.

“Don’t play stupid, baby. It’s not gonna work this time,”

This time? What was that supposed to mean? You wanted to ask, but knew better than to let it slip from your lips. He was obviously upset and lashing out, and you knew you needed to figure out what he was going on about before he was too angry to deal with. Nick would never hurt you, you knew that, but he had a way of taking his anger and frustrations out on you that would leave you feeling him for days. Normally you didn’t mind, but seeing as his ire was now directed, in part, at you, you felt a little more… nervous. He had never spoken to you like this before and you certainly were not a fan of it. He was making you feel uneasy.

“Nick, I honestly have no clue what you’re talking about or even who you’re talking about,”

“I saw you on your way out earlier, princess. What did you tell him, hm? What did he say to you to get you to smile so pretty for him?”

You sat there, mouth agape and brows furrowed as he spoke so condescending towards you. You thought back to when you were leaving today, who had you seen on your way out? Who had you talked to? The only person you could think of was Johnathan.

Yeah, it was Johnathan. He stopped you on your way to your car, asking about when would be a good time for a double date night with you and Nick and him and his wife. He’d been trying to set something up for a while, since they had moved in a few months back. Nick was evasive the couple of times Johnathan had caught him outside - always asking when you two were free. It was odd, certainly, but you had never thought anything of it. Only that he seemed to be a friendly neighbor, maybe overly so, but nothing more.

And certainly Nick knew better than to assume anything more than friendly, courteous conversation was happening between the two of you anytime you may have spoken. You were just being polite.

“This is about Jonathan?” you asked, almost disbelieving. “Seriously, Nick? He said hello and asked about you, like he always does before I told him I had to get going. That was it. That can’t be why you’re so upset. Will you please, just tell me what happened?” you tried asking again as you reached for one of his hands to examine more closely.

“Let me get you cleaned up and-,” you soothed before you found yourself being shoved down onto your back. The movement was sudden and unexpected. As you found yourself pinned down onto the hardwood floor, Nick on top of you, his hand wrapped firmly around your neck as his ice blue eyes raged with betrayal, you didn’t have time to scream and only managed to squeak out in protest before he spoke. He was mere inches from your face as your hands instinctively grabbed onto his forearm while he held you tighter.

“I told you to stop lying,” he spit out as you stared up at him in complete shock. You tried to speak but the hold he had on you, the way he was choking you made it nearly impossible. He stared into your frightened eyes for a moment before he loosened his hand from your throat and you coughed out, desperately trying to regain your breath as your head lolled to the side. He immediately grabbed your face and brought you back to looking directly up at him while you heaved.

“I’m not lying, Nick! What the hell is wrong with you?” you cried beneath him, trying to push him off but getting nowhere. He ignored your words, clearly not satisfied with your answer and seemingly unphased by your fighting against him as he continued staring into your eyes. When you stopped thrashing, he let out a heavy breath, letting his head fall slightly, his forehead against yours.

“I’ve already forgiven you, princess. I promise. I just need you to tell me the truth now so we can move past this,” he bargained as his thumb brushed away the tears that had fallen down your cheeks.

You stared perplexed yet again as your brows returned to their furrowed position.

“The truth? The truth is I haven’t done anything. I still have no idea what you’re talking about or what happened while I was gone- I-”

You were interrupted by Nick scoffing and huffing as he hauled you roughly up from the floor. He had a tight grip on your arm as he pulled you to him. You crashed into him with the force of his pull before he spun you so you were in front of him, your back now to his chest, as he urged you to walk in front of him while he led from behind.

“I really didn’t want to do this the hard way, sweetheart, but you’re leaving me with no choice.” he said as he moved you both to the garage. “You’re gonna tell me the truth, in your own words, one way or another.” he promised.

As he shoved the door open from behind you and urged you in, you were stunned by the sight you were met with. You gasped in shock as you stared at your unconscious, bloodied and beaten neighbor tied to a chair. The walls of the normally empty garage and the floor beneath him were covered in plastic. You were genuinely lost and felt like you were on a delay as you just continued to stare, begging your mind to catch up.

What had Nick done in the few hours you had been gone and why?

“Let’s start off easy,” he began as he spoke into your ear. “How long?”

“How long, what?” you stuttered out in a whisper.

“How long have you been planning this? How long have you been working with him?”

“Working wi- what? Working with him? What are you talking about, Nick? What the hell is happening?”

“He said you’ve been in on it since before we met.. But I know that’s not true. Can’t be. Because I’m the one who found you, not the other way around. I don’t believe you’re that conniving and I know you’re not that smart. So, tell me. When did he get into contact with you and when did you decide to work with him, huh?”

“He said what?” you asked shrilly. “I swear to God, Nick, I met him when you did. I’d never seen him before in my life. And I wasn’t working with him on anything? What does- what does that even mean? Look, I don’t know what happened, I don’t know what he told you, but he’s lying. Whatever he told you, he was lying! And how could you believe him,” you finished, your voice on the verge of breaking.

He stayed quiet for a minute, then his grip left your arms. You stayed still in your spot while he was still close behind you, close enough that you felt it when he was reaching for something. You weren’t sure what he was doing until he moved his arms to wrap around your waist lightly as his hands crossed in front of you. As you slowly looked down at his hands, you saw his pistol being held in his right hand. He leaned down to rest his head on your shoulder as you continued to stay as still as you could.

“Nick,” you nearly whimpered. He sighed, nodded his head and placed a gentle kiss on your neck before he spoke.

“I believe you,” he said, standing up straight.

It happened so fast. You had instinctively turned around into Nick the second you saw him raise his gun. With his left hand, he pushed you out of the way as he stepped in front of you and aimed his pistol at Jonathan - firing a single shot into him without a second of hesitation. You jumped at the sound of the shot as you were looking away from the scene while your eyes watered and your hands covered your mouth as you silently gasped in shock.

Nick put his gun down on the workstation next to him and turned to you, walking to where you were standing. He didn’t say anything as he pulled you into his chest as he wrapped his arms around you before moving a hand to hold your head against him as he tried to comfort you.

“Sorry, angel. You’re so gullible, so easily persuaded into things, I just had to be sure,” he began as he moved to walk you back into the house. His calm was a stark contrast to your terror filled debilitation.

“He got inside after you left and tried to sneak up on me. Honestly, he’s probably the worst trained agent I’ve ever come across. I heard him coming from a mile away.”

You were back in the house, he guided you to the den and sat you down on the chair he had been previously occupying in front of the fire. You were clearly in shock as he continued speaking.

“Got him tied up in the garage, I told him to talk but he didn’t want to. Took a little work, but eventually he broke and told me all about his secret assignment. And then,” he paused, taking a deep breath before letting out a light scoff, “he brought up you,” he said as he caressed your face gently.

“And each time your name left his mouth, I couldn’t stop myself from punching the living fuck out of him. He passed out and I came inside and waited for you to get back. You know, he was shitty at every other part of his job, but he sure knew how to get under my skin.. The rational part of my brain kept telling me he was full of shit, I knew he was, I just- I hated even having to think about the possibility it was true.

“But sweetheart,” he said as he grabbed your face, making sure you were looking him in the eye before he continued. “I want you to know that even if you had been working for him, with him, whatever, that I would have forgiven you.

“I know you weren’t, I know you didn’t, but if you had, we would’ve moved past it. Because no matter what, we belong together. You’re mine. And I know how much you love me. I know you’d do anything for me. And I’m sorry I had any doubt.”

He was squatting down in front of you as you were finally starting to process everything. Your breathing became quicker and quicker and your mind was racing.

“His wife, Nick. What about his wife? She’s gonna- she’s gonna be looking for him. What are we gonna do? What do we do? He’s- he’s, he’s dead, Nick. He’s dead. In our garage. What do we do?” you rambled as you began to cry again, leaning forward into him desperately.

He pulled you to stand up and held you once again.

“There’s nothing to worry about, sweetheart. I already sent some people over to his house. There was no one living there but him. He’d been staking us out since he moved in. Working for some rebel agency after he was dismissed in the academy. Never even made it into the bureau. But don’t worry, it’s all taken care of, I promise. No one’s missing him except whoever sent him, and we already have plans on how we’re gonna deal with that,” he assured you.

You stayed in his embrace, the only source of comfort you had. You were still upset and you wanted him to know it, but you didn’t want to lose his touch or push him anymore than he had been pushed today by getting angry and blowing up at him after everything.

“I wasn’t working with or for him. I have never told him anything about you,” you said quietly into his chest as your lip wobbled. “How could you accuse me of doing something like that?” you asked as you pulled back to look at him, his eyes much softer now and full of sorries. “You’re my everything, you know that. I love you, I would never go behind your back. I would never want to get you hurt in any way.

“I would never do that to you. I could never do that to you.”

He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss to your lips, pressing his forehead to yours as he nodded.

“I know, princess. I know. I’m sorry,” he said solemnly. You just hugged him tighter as he held you.

“Your hands,” you suddenly remembered. “Let’s go upstairs,” you said.

“Hey, angel,” he stopped you from pulling him further, “I think you’re still in shock. I just shot a man in front of you, you don’t need to be taking care of me right now. I’m taking care of you.” You stared at him a moment in silence, gently biting your lip trying to keep yourself together.

“You killed him,” you said bleakly.

“I killed him, yeah. I shouldn’t have done that in front of you, I’m sorry.”

“He was trying to kill you first, though,”

“Yeah, he was.”

“And he was trying to make you believe I was in on it,” you added.

“Yes.”

You just nodded against his chest as you leaned into him again.

“He had it coming, but that has nothing to do with me doing it right in front of you. Don’t try to rationalize the trauma,” he lightly chuckled. He was pretty accustomed to death. He had seen his fair share of it and his hands obviously weren’t clean of anyone’s blood, either. Though that certainly wasn’t something he ever wanted for you.

“It’s normally pretty difficult for people the first time they see someone die,” he said softly.

“The first time?” you said, sounding stressed. “The only time. First and last,” you said seriously.

“First and last,” he promised.

You later found yourself wrapped in your bath towel, sitting on the edge of your bed while Nick dried himself off with his own. You had cleaned his hands yourself before he ran a bath for the both of you. Sitting in the bubbles, you just laid with him in the warm water while his hands trailed up and down your body. You didn’t talk, just enjoyed his presence. That was until the realization that you could have actually lost him today hit you.

You looked up at him and tugged him closer to you as your eyes threatened to spill over with tears. Nick hushed you softly as he kissed your head.

“I can’t lose you,” you whispered.

“You aren’t going to, princess,” he assured you. You soaked a little while longer before you moved to the shower together. You were now clean and a lot more relaxed after being comforted by him all night long.

Nick moved over to you, standing before you as you sat on the bed. You looked up to him with a small pout and puppy eyes and just raised your arms up to him. He laughed a little before he bent down to your level, allowing you to wrap your arms around the back of his neck, hands finding his hair as you pulled him into a soft kiss. He gently pulled away from you and tugged your towel off of your body before he pulled his own off of his waist and tossed both of them to the wayside as he immediately went back to your soft, waiting lips, his hands framing your face while he deepened the kiss.

You broke away for a breath, staying nose to nose with him. Quiet and softly, you spoke with your eyes closed as your foreheads touched, “You’re my first and last.” The sweet reminder of the fact that Nick indeed was your ‘first’, in a lot more than just sex, and that he would absolutely be your ‘last’ as well, seemed to only frenzy him as he returned his lips to yours hotly.

“Your one and only,” he snarled as you nodded against him.

“My one and only,” you repeated obediently.

Before you knew it, he had you on your back and moved you up the mattress, allowing him more room to kneel above you, only breaking the kiss to breathe. His hands were on your face and yours were in his hair as you continued to sensually make out. Soon, his hands began wandering your naked body and as he lowered himself and closed the space between you, you could feel his heavy cock, hard and hot against you. You spread your legs around him as he moved his lips down to your chest. You moaned at the feeling of him playing with your breasts. He was toying with your nipple in one hand as he took the other into his hot mouth. Suckling and nibbling, getting you more and more wet for him as he moved to deliver the same attention to your other breast. Leaving kisses and love bites all over your ample chest before moving back up and attacking your neck with the same need.

You knew he was trying to be gentle, working very hard to not go feral over you. You could feel it in his tense muscles, he was too stiff and you knew he was holding back for you. Trying to, at least. But when you felt him bite your shoulder a little too harshly as he grabbed your ass roughly, you knew what he really wanted, needed. Today was a bad day to say the least and you knew he needed to let it out. Normally he had no qualms about taking his frustrations out on you in bed but today was different. You were involved in this and he had already hurt you earlier, you were still fragile. He didn’t want to push you so he was trying to keep his aggressions at bay. But you didn’t want that. You wanted to feel him. Completely, with no inhibitions. You needed it.

Pulling his hair back just enough to get him to look up to you, you urged him closer as you kissed him hard before speaking.

“Nick, baby, I want you. Use me. Please. Don’t want you to hold back,”

“Princess,” he tried to caution, voice hard.

“Please,” you begged. “It’s okay, I’m okay. I want you to feel better. I want you, I just want you, please.”

He didn’t need much more persuasion as he crashed his lips into yours again. Your hands were on his back, holding him close to you, chest to chest, before he pulled away from your lips and pulled back. Your hands fell from his back and moved to his built chest, then up along his muscular shoulders as he stared down at you with dark, hungry eyes.

He pulled you up with him suddenly as he got off the bed completely. You stared at him confused for just a second before you realized what he wanted. Without him saying a word, you got up and bent over the side of the mattress, your ass sticking out as you stood there in anticipation of what was to come..

“Color?” he asked huskily.

“Green.” was your prompt response.

The first strike of his hand across your bottom stung in the most pleasant, familiar way. You moaned at the second one as he admired the jiggle of your ass, squeezing your flesh before he landed the next strike. He spanked you repeatedly as your skin grew hot, your eyes grew teary, and your pussy grew needier with each hit. You were a mess for him already.

As he grabbed at your ass and soothed your hot flesh, he couldn’t help but taunt you as he admired your slick pussy drooling for his attention.

“All this for me, princess?” he asked as his thick fingers swiped through your wet folds while you whimpered. He rubbed your wetness around as he continued playing with you before plunging one finger inside of you, curling against your tight walls.

“Yes, yes, Nick, all for you,” you moaned.

You could practically hear him smirking as he moved closer behind you. He pulled his finger out after pumping in and out of you teasingly. He pushed you further up the bed as he grabbed your ass again and spread your cheeks so much so that you opened up even more for him, you could feel your pussy spreading for him as he squeezed you and continued his playing. He slapped your ass once more and without warning thrust two of his fingers inside your wet and wanting cunt. You mewled in delight as he scissoed them inside you, preparing you for his cock. He loved playing with you, teasing you with pleasure and watching you writhe with desire for him to push you off of the edge. And he would, eventually, but he liked seeing just how far he could push and taunt you before you were crying for him. So he continued fingering and stimulating you just enough to keep you on the edge, but not enough to get you there. Not yet.

“Please,” you whimpered out with a breathy moan. He slid his fingers out of you at your pathetic plea and then leaned over your back, shoving his fingers past your lips into your mouth as he spoke in your ear.

“Suck,” he commanded, voice low and heady. You did as he said, sucking his fingers clean as he panted over you, and you could feel him grinding his cock against your ass. He pulled his fingers past your lips before he placed a sloppy kiss on your shoulder as he stood back up.

“Good girl,” he praised.

He grabbed his thick cock in his hand and decided to tease you a little more as he ran his tip up and down your slit. You were mewling at the sensation and wanted more.

“Your needy little pussy’s just crying for my cock, isn’t she?” he taunted, voice thick with desire.

“Mhm yes, Nick, please. Please fuck me. I need it, need you, need your cock inside me, please,” you whined desperately.

“Careful what you ask for, princess,” he said darkly before he positioned his cock up to your dripping hole. He thrust into you and began moving hard and fast as he fucked you without restraint. You were groaning and moaning as he hit deep inside of you, your legs dangling over the edge of the bed now with how far he pushed you up with his thrusts. His hand went to your hair and he pulled your head back harshly, loving the way your body reacted to him while he grunted in pleasure as you continued whimpering and babbling pure nonsense.

Letting go of your hair, his hands then gripped your soft, fleshy hips as he pulled you back onto his cock repeatedly, slamming in and out of you. The clap of his pelvis meeting the flesh of your ass while he continued pounding into you was salacious and lewd and served only to turn you on more.

“Fuck, you look so fucking pretty when you’re being spread open on my cock, angel. Feels so fucking good, fuck,” he grunted huskily, moaning at the feeling of you.

Your fingers were buried in the sheets as he fucked you further into the mattress and you were on the very brink of your orgasm. Nick was hitting so deep inside of you and you had never felt so full. Each slide of his cock against your walls brought you closer as he stimulated your g-spot with every thrust.

His right hand left your hip and slithered under you to where his index finger found your clit. He began rubbing the swollen nub in small circles, causing you to clench hard around him as he swiftly brought you to your orgasm with the added stimulation. You were moaning and crying breathlessly as you came, eyes squeezed shut as he rode you through your high and talked you through your orgasm.

“Ah, fuck, princess,” he moaned out. “You’re squeezing me so goddamn tight. Coming on my cock like a good girl, huh. You like that, yeah. Love when I split you open like this, don’t you. Love when I fuck your pretty little pussy, stuff you full of my cock while I play with your clit,” he spoke into your ear as he leaned over you again.

“Mmhm, I love it, ‘so good, it’s so good. Fuck,” you cried as you mewled into the sheet beneath you while he continued pounding in and out of your overworked cunt.

He took your hands in his, intertwining your fingers as he pulled your arms down and around your back, his hips snapping more erratically into you as he chased his high. He was leaning all of his weight onto you as he leaned over your body, pushing you further into the bed as he groaned. You knew he was close as he lost any of the restraint he may have had left, your name leaving his lips along with a string of curses.

“No one else could ever make you come undone like this. No one else will ever get to fuck you, feel your tight cunt wrapped around them. Fuck, this is goddamn heaven. And it’s all mine,” he said, moaning and grunting.

“You’re mine,” he growled into your ear. “And you’re gonna come again for me. Need to feel you come again, princess. Need to feel you grip my cock like that again.”

As if the never ending stimulation from his thick cock rocking into you from behind along with the thrilling sounds and praises you were pulling out of him weren’t enough to make you come again, those words absolutely were. Your toes were curling and the feeling of him on top of you - his pants and moans right in your ear as he leaned into you even more, all of it, every word, sound, and sensation were cascading at once into you and sent you headfirst into another orgasm, your hands squeezing his as he pushed into you further, your walls tightening around him again while he bit into your shoulder and you whimpered pathetically.

“I’m gonna come inside you, angel. Fill you up full of me, and you’re gonna take every last bit of my come, you hear me,” he panted through grit teeth in your ear. “You’re gonna be feeling me for days after tonight, princess. But that’s exactly what you wanted, isn’t it. Just can’t fucking get enough,” he growled before he pulled out of you. He flipped you onto your back so quickly you barely even registered it happened until he slammed right back into you, his hands keeping your thick thighs spread for him as he pulled you as close to him as he could, your ass on the very edge of the bed as he kept your legs open around his hips. He thrust a couple times more, long and hard, before he seated himself as far inside of you as he possibly could with the most beautiful moan you’d ever heard, his shuddering breaths falling on you as he started to let himself go inside of you, your pussy gripping him like a vice all the while. His hands were back on your hips as his body fell forward, his head nuzzling to the crook of your neck as he sucked air in through his teeth before letting out a deep, guttural groan, nearly shivering as he came harder inside of you. His thick ropes of come filling you. You held him close to you, petting his head as he leisurely pumped his cock inside of you a few more times, riding out his orgasm as you panted and mewled beneath him every time he stimulated your ever sensitive clit. When he was finished, you were sure you had never been so full. You could practically feel him leaking out of you.

You were both panting, regaining your breath, as he smiled against your skin, coming down from his high and nuzzling more into your neck as he readjusted the both of you to be more comfortable on the bed.

“You’re perfect, you know that? Every last thing about you,” he said as his arms went around the dip of your back, hands settling on your hips once again as he kissed your neck, up to your cheek, peppering kisses along your skin.

You smiled at his words and the feeling of his soft lips trailing along your tender flesh as tingles ran through you, wrapping your arms around him. Briefly you heard his earlier words float through your head. You’d never known him to be so…mean. To you, at least. Though you wanted to forget it, it continued nagging at you while he laid in your arms.

As he slowly pulled out of you and got off the bed, you pondered talking to him about it. You didn’t want to upset him, but this was gonna bug you if you didn’t voice it.

He was back in front of you with a damp rag and the most loving look in his eyes. Gently, he cleaned his spend from between your legs and after discarding the rag, crawled on top of you, engulfing you in his arms, pulling you into his side as you were cuddling with him.

“Nick,” you muttered softly. He hummed in response, waiting for you to continue.

“I just wanted to ask, to know..Earlier, you… do you, you really think that? That I’m stupid?” you asked quietly, your embarrassment and hurt evident as you tried to hide your face against him.

“Oh, sweetheart,” he gently pulled you back to look at him, his eyes full of sympathy, a stark contrast to the cold fire that raged there previously. “No, I don’t think you’re stupid.”

“Really?” you pressed.

“Really,” he nodded. “You’re not stupid, you’re naive,” he stated matter of factly.

You looked down, wincing slightly as you pulled away from him. Tried to, at least. Nick was quick to pull you back to him, tilting your chin up as he forced you to make eye contact.

“Hey,” he breathed, “that’s not necessarily a bad thing. You may be naive but no one's gonna take advantage of that or use it against you, I’ll always be right here looking out for you. Protecting you.” He placed a soft kiss on your lips as you allowed yourself to settle next to him again.

“And I love that about you,” he smiled. “It’s just natural for you to be sweet.. and trusting.. and kind,” he punctuated each word with a gentle kiss to your temple, cheek, and finally your soft lips once again after nuzzling your nose. “I’m so lucky I found you before the world could change any of that.” Those words, sickly sweet and full of love and admiration of you, that was your Nick. The way he behaved earlier was intense and unlike anything you’d received from him before. You were just glad he was back now, and eager to forget the hurt he caused you. Certain he wouldn’t do anything like it again to you.

You half smiled before sucking your lip, your mind returning to the current conversation you were having with him, “Certainly tried to.”

You thought back to just a couple years ago, before you met Nick, before everything changed. You were making minimum wage, working two jobs in the city, living in a shitty apartment with a roommate you barely knew. Life had never been easy on you. But the moment Nick came into yours, it was like he just made everything better. He took care of you like no one ever had. Showed you love like you’d never known. You felt like you owed him everything. You really would do anything for him, he was your whole world now. That’s why it hurt so badly when he insisted you were lying to him earlier. You thought you had made it clear that that was something you would never do to him. You loved him so much. You figurned you just needed to show it more. To do anything and everything you could to reinforce the simple fact that you were his and his alone. Forever. It was the least you could do, right? He gave you everything, and made sure you were aware of the fact that he’d do anything for you, he’d protect you and love you with all he had. You needed to ensure he knew, without a single doubt in his mind, that you’d do the same. Because you really would, you did. He never made you question for even a second his devotion to you. He always said how lucky he was to have found you, but you felt even luckier for it. Truly, where would you be without him? You didn’t want to even think about it. It was all too much to put into words at the moment. For now though, exhausted and worn from the tumultuous events of the day, laying next to him, his protective hold on you as you were cuddling into his warmth and feeling surrounded by the love you shared, it was enough.

“I’m so grateful for you,” you sighed.

He caressed your cheek as he smiled at you, admiring your delicacy. He knew you were perfect for him the moment he had first laid eyes on you. He knew you were meant to be his, and so he made sure that you were and you always would be.

“I love you,” he kissed you once more as your eyes threatened to shut, lashes fluttering.

“I love you, more,” you whispered as you nuzzled further into him.

“You look exhausted,” he chuckled softly. “Go to sleep, angel.”

He was right, you were completely drained, but still, you wanted to fight your sleep a little longer. You worried your dreams would be flooded with nightmares of dangerous men breaking into your home, trying to hurt you, trying to hurt Nick, and god, the sound of the pistol firing ringing in the back of your mind. You shook your head, hoping to shake the sound as well. A man died today. And that could have been Nick. That thought wrecked you. You didn’t want to be without him for even a moment, not even in your sleep.

“I will,” you mumbled, holding onto him.

“I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere,” he said as if he could read your mind, rubbing your arm soothingly. You needed to come back to yourself. You were only working yourself up to dwell on things you couldn’t change or control. And with Nick around, you didn’t need to worry about anything, he’d take care of it all. He’d keep you both safe..he’d always keep you safe. Finally allowing yourself to really settle while Nick held you, you were soon sleeping, and though you woke up every now and again with a start, Nick was always still right beside you. His touch calming as he’d lull you back to sleep. He was here and you were safe, he’d remind you, mumbling words of comfort against your temple until you fell asleep again. He stayed up all night just making sure you were okay. He said he’d take care of you and he meant it. He’d be damned if you ever had to go through anything like tonight again, but right now he just needed to be sure you were okay and slept through the night. He already had his guys tracking down their headquarters and first thing tomorrow, he'd be sure the people who were responsible for tonight would be deeply regretting getting anywhere near you and ensuring they’d never have the chance again. And after that, he’d finally tell you the big news. You two were going off the grid, somewhere remote where it could be just the two of you, like it should be. Somewhere safe, where no one could find you. He’d had the plans set for a while now, and it was the perfect time to do it. You were more dependent on him, he was sure you’d say yes without him having to convince or force you to. The ring was perfect and he couldn’t wait to slip it on your finger. He wasn’t sure you’d be ready for another big move, but the honeymoon would be the perfect cover to get you there without you worrying. You’d say ‘I do’ and it would all work out. He’d be your first, your last, your only, just like he was meant to be. Always and forever. Just you and him.

#nick fowler x reader #nick fowler #dark!nick fowler #soft!dark nick fowler #nick fowler x y/n #soft!dark nick fowler x reader #soft dark nick fowler #naive!reader

[yourmidnightlover]

this one time

pairing: steve x mayfield!fem!reader

summary: reader gets mixed up in the upside down drama with her sister (s2 era) and happens to get a good dose of steve harrington, and she vows it’ll only be this one time.

warnings: ohhhh boy, billy being verbally and physically abusive, fighting, season 2 (aka demodogs and whatnot), illuding to an abusive household (duh), reader being independent as hell (like to a fault lmao bc me too sometimes), kinda sad ending (oops?)

a/n: in this fic, steve and nancy never got together in season 2 :) i think that’s the only variation in the fic. i’m ngl i might’ve cried while writing this but that also could’ve just been me being hormonal lol. also my second stranger things fic!! i’m kinda excited and can’t wait to see how this goes!

you didn’t quite know why he would always stare at you. to be frank, it was getting weird.

at lunch, when you would be waiting for max, basically every time you were in his line of sight his eyes were on you.

you even had a few classes with steve. luckily you were able to sit closer to the back. the downside to that is that the seats were all right by steve. whether in front, behind, or beside. it was worth it to not be in the front row, but still. it sucked.

you just kept your head down and let the day pass as fast as it possibly could, hoping that steve would mind his own business. sometimes he did. other times he would try to start a conversation.

“you do the homework?” steve leaned over to ask, too sweet of a tone adorning his voice to tell his true intentions.

“yes, harrington,” you rolled your eyes. “i did the homework. could your brain cells not keep up enough to finish it?”

“sadly, no,” he sighed, whipping out a softer, pitiful voice. “i was hoping maybe yours were able to make up for the disappearance of mine?”

“this is the last time,” you widened your eyes, trying to remain serious to the annoying little boy. “why do you never do it?”

“well, it always gives me an excuse to talk to you,” he had a sly grin on that stupid face.

you knew him and nancy were once a thing, but after will byers was found things changed. steve found that nancy was different after everything and they had both changed too much for them to make sense anymore.

but that didn’t mean that you and him made any sense at all.

“yea, shut it, harrington,” you scoffed as you let him glance at your paper to copy onto his own.

maybe he was drawn to you because you were a bit stand-offish. you knew you were. it’s because of billy. you had to be the protective older sister max needed. you were her biological sister, but you weren’t always so mean, only when billy and his dad came around.

you would be the one to defend max to billy. on occasion, you would have to defend max against billy’s dad. this might’ve earned you a bit of, punishment, as they would call it. others would say it’s abuse.

regardless, it wasn’t always like this. used to, you would play with max all the time. you were the one to teach her to skate. you had taught her the importance of self confidence. you were her older sister. she loved you dearly, and you did her. you still did, as did she.

it was just the dynamic that had changed. now, instead of being the sweet older sister everyone knew you were the rude, protective one. perhaps you just didn’t know how to shut off the mask you put up so often, in the house you would never call a home.

it was only a matter of time before you and max got dragged into the wild world of the upside down. you had brought her to the arcade that day lucas tried to explain everything to her. as per usual, she told you everything.

“maybe he just wants to impress you?” you scoffed, the story sounding unbelievable to yourself as well.

“why like this?” she rested her head against her fist by the window. “it’s just so stupid.”

“as are boys this age, max. they’re idiots that would say anything to impress a girl,” you gave her a pressed smile. “boys are stupid. why do you think i haven’t had one?”

“yea, maybe i should follow in your footsteps,” max added.

you laughed lightly before gently nudging her shoulder, turning up the radio to the latest kate bush song that had come out.

so when lucas told max that he had real proof, you were practically forced to follow along. well, not forced. max had asked you to come, in case anything funky was going on, and you happily said yes.

little did you know you would be met with dustin henderson and your very own king steve harrington. steve had directed you all, telling you what to do. the experience was rather ominous up to this point, so you reluctantly listened, but only to protect your sister in the case that they weren’t lying.

and once everything was boarded up, you went inside of the bus and waited. and waited. and waited.

max finally got tired of the silence when she asked, “so you really fought one of these things before?”

steve’s gaze from you was finally broken as he simply nodded his head, continuing to play with his lighter in attempt to pass the time a bit quicker than it was going.

“and you’re like, totally, 100% sure it wasn’t a bear?” she offered, being the sassy mini you she always was, you bit back a laugh.

that’s when little dustin decided to speak up a bit, “shit,” he huffed. “don’t be an idiot. okay. it wasn’t a bear,” but he wasn’t done there. “why’re you even here if you don’t believe us? just go home.”

“geesh,” max got up, headed towards the ladder. “someone’s cranky. past your bedtime?” she asked as she began ascending the ladder.

you busied yourself by fiddling with some old peeling fabric from one of the seats to hide the laugh in your throat.

“that’s good,” steve spoke, seemingly proud of the toddler who had tried to insult your little sister. “just show her you don’t care.”

“i don’t,” the toddler deadpanned, staring him straight in the eyes. “why’re you winking steve? stop.”

“really?” you chuckled, speaking up about the stupid situation at hand. “show her you don’t care? that’s the advice you gave him?”

“well, yea,” steve nodded, still playing with his little lighter.

“and does that always work with the girls you like?” you leant down, getting closer to steve on the floor.

you could hear how his breath hitched in his throat as he stumbled to find the right words.

“uhh yea, mo-most of the time,” he stopped toying with the lighter, focusing on dustin who was simply pacing back and forth, mumbling some incoherent nonsense that you figured you probably wouldn’t be able to understand even if you could hear him.

“most of the time?” you scoffed. “so you told him to be a dick to my sister on account of ‘most of the time’?”

“i didn’t say to be a dick!” he threw his hands up in defense.

“well he was being one.”

“i never told him to be one!”

“next time make sure he knows that, asshole.”

a loud growl interrupted your argument. your body became stiff as you instinctively curled into the arm that he protectively threw over your shoulders as you made your way to see what the ruckus was outside.

“lucas!” dustin shouted. “what’s goin’ on!” he demanded to know.

“hold on!” lucas replied.

silence fell over the group as you shrugged steve’s arm off of you, forgetting he had held it there. if you had paid attention to it, it felt a scarier without his arm there.

“i’ve got eyes!” lucas finally informed you. “ten o’clock! ten-ten o’clock!”

“there,” steve pointed at the creature outside of the bus, crawling low and slow.

“what’s he doing?” dustin wondered.

“i don’t know.” steve answered once more. “he’s not taking the bait. why’s he not taking the bait?” he asked worriedly.

“maybe he’s not hungry?” dustin tried to guess before a lightbulb went off in steve’s mind.

“maybe he’s sick of cow?” he replied smartly.

“wait-you mean?” you spoke up for once before steve backed away, making eye contact with you before turning.

“steve?” dustin asked. “steve, what’re you doing? steve?” he worried.

steve turned back to dustin and tossed him the lighter, “just get ready.”

“you’re not going out there alone,” you huffed at the brown eyed boy.

“like hell i’m not,” he replied, turning to face you once more. “you need to stay safe.”

“no, the kids need to stay safe,” you argued. “i’m going with you,” you told him as you grabbed a metal pipe and turned toward the door.

steve huffed as he rolled his eyes at you.

“are you gonna open the door or do you need me to go first?” you offered, teasing the boy before he reluctantly opened the door and headed out first.

“back to back, yea?” he whispered, feeling your back against his own.

you slowly walked towards the creature making the noise, feeling the whoosh of wind coming from steve swinging his bat in circles, probably from the nerves. he started whistling, trying to draw the creature out from wherever it was hiding.

“come on, buddy,” he teased with another whistle. “come on, buddy. dinner time. human tastes better than cat, i promise.”

“cat?” you whisper-yelled at him.

“i’ll fill you in later,” he replied.

when you heard the growl once more, somehow clearer, you turned to face it. you had to know what it was. the dog cleared, giving you sight of the monster you’d been told about.

“oh, god,” you raised your elbow, ready to swing in case of any sudden movement made by the thing.

“steve!” lucas shouted. “watch out!”

“little busy here!” steve roared before you turned around, noticing the second monster.

“oh, god,” your breathing picked up.

“three o’clock,” you nudged his shoulder to inform him of the new situation.

when he turned to where you were faced, his own face became filled with worry rather than mild fear. backed the two of you up a bit before the bus door flung open.

“abort! abort!” dustin shouted. “steve! y/n!”

“run!” the kids were screaming.

but every which way you looked, there was a new monster blocking your path. steve ran for the car, sliding across it before whacking one of the creatures, hearing it whimper and thud against the ground. you heard one behind your own back.

“y/n!” max shouted at you, alerting you that there was one behind you.

you swung and turned your body in one motion, the momentum enough to knock its body to the ground with a whine. another one was approaching your left, so you did the same thing with success.

after turning to where you last saw steve, he was running to you, shouting at you to move. you were too slow. a creature had tackled you to the ground, luckily steve had swung his bat before anything had happened, knocking the creature off of your body and to the side before he scooped you up bridal style and carried you into the bus himself, dustin slamming the door shut on the monsters.

they were easily able to break through the metal covering the door, leaving steve to knock the things with his nailed bat as the kids ran to the other side of the bus. you had luckily kept a hold of your metal pipe after being knocked down, your leg had been hurt but it wasn’t the time to worry about that.

dustin began to radio on his headset for anyone who could hear, seemingly with no hope. max had nudged your shoulder, motioning to the sunroof of the bus, the open sunroof of the bus. you pushed her behind you and made your way to where the roof was, not getting too close.

you could hear the stomps of the monsters above your heads before one approached the ladder. all you heard was max’s scream. the monster began to lunge towards you before steve put himself between you and the creature.

“come on you little piece of shit!” he bellowed. “you want some? come on!”

all at once the creatures began to turn away, no longer banging on the bus trying to get inside. steve had looked at you once more, a look of both relief and worry in his face.

you hadn’t even realized that you had latched onto steve’s arm. you didn’t care. you kept it there for a moment longer, hoping he wouldn’t notice or mind. you were scared, you could make an excuse.

this one time.

after a few moments of silence, steve had began to make his way outside, you following right behind with the rest of the kids.

“what happened?” lucas asked, all out of breath as if he had been the one fighting out there.

“i-i don’t know,” max hesitated.

“they scared ‘em off?” dustin mentioned, trying to find some sort of positive.

“no,” steve told them. “no way. there goin’ somewhere.”

when you all decided to take off in the direction of the ominous sound, which happened to thankfully break lucas and dustin’s little argument, steve had noticed after a while that you had been taking a bit longer than the others to keep up. you weren’t too slow, just a bit out of breath. he hung back for a second so he could ask you.

“hey,” steve began quietly as dustin and lucas went ahead. “did you get hurt? when you got tackled?”

“i-i don’t know,” you replied, more truthful than saying no. you just didn’t want to be a burden to the group, but you couldn’t stay behind. “i’ll be fine.”

“y/n,” he sighed. “which leg?” he pointed at them both before you lifted your pant leg, revealing a bruise all the way up your shin, a bit of blood from a cut running halfway down your leg. “that? y/n…” he trailed off.

he automatically put your arm around his shoulder, his arm going to your waist, acting as a crutch so you two could limp along together. you appreciated it, which was odd. you were always in depended. max noticed this too. and you noticed max holding lucas’s hand earlier. she had been talking to him on the roof of the bus prior to the, ‘demodog,’ as you came to find out, experience.

what was it with hawkins boys knocking down your walls? you didn’t like it. but, your leg really fucking hurt, so you could make an excuse.

this one time.

the rest of the night went by fast.

the noise led you to this… hospital? you had to pick up hopper, the police chief, will, mike, and joyce, wills mom. you had also ran into nancy and her boyfriend? jonathan. you weren’t sure if they were official.

when you ran into nancy and jonathan you only felt steve’s hold on you get a little tighter. you would only let yourself embrace it tonight. only tonight. you made your way back to joyce’s house, who you already felt this motherly hold over you. you enjoyed it. it was different.

you weren’t quite sure what you were doing. waiting, you suppose. they had filled you in on everything. the upside down, this girl named el, will’s whole experience and now what he’s going through.

then mike starting saying how bob, the man who had passed while saving the rest of them, had started the av club. how he couldn’t die in vain.

next thing you know they’re talking about the shadow monster and the tunnels that’re connected with the hive mind. how everything, the demodogs, tunnels, mind flayer, and even will are connected.

then the kids are telling you about this mind flayer character from d&d to relate this new creature to something a little more understandable. how this creature wants to conquer us, and become the master race. and the only way to know how to destroy this monster, is through will.

you all worked to make his shed unrecognizable. you covered it in sheets and foil and tons of bright lights. then your part was over. it was yet another waiting game.

while the kids were figuring out the morse code will was signaling, steve ushered you to the bathroom.

“what’re you doing?” you sighed, already exhausted from the night you’ve had.

“cleaning you up,” he informed you as he tapped the countertop, wanting you to hop up. “it doesn’t need to get infected and with those demodogs that did this to you we don’t know what bacteria they carry. so,” he tapped the counter twice more to prove his point, his voice like satin.

you lifted your hurt leg to hop on the other, grasping steve’s shoulder a bit so you could get on the counter easier. his hand went to your waist to help.

“alright, you wanna squeeze my hand when i pour this?” he asked as he lifted a bottle of alcohol to pour on your leg.

you nodded. only for tonight.

“one,” he began counting, only he began pouring on two.

“fuck!” you grasped his shoulder with your free hand, squeezing his hand that was in your grasp. “shit, shit, shit,” you whispered, trying not to distract the decoding process. “ohhh i hate you steve.”

the smell of him was a bit distracting from the pain. it was sweaty, but with undertones of his cedar wood cologne able to peak through. but that little distraction, the little peak of him you were able to focus on, was worth it.

“aww you don’t mean that,” he put on a small smile at your anger. “okay… that’s it. now i’m just gonna put some of this on,” he held up some neosporin from the first aid kit, “and then i’ll bandage you up, yea?”

“yea,” you nodded. “that shit hurt more than it did when i got it,” you motioned to the peroxide.

“sorry,” steve didn’t know what else to say as he finished his handiwork, releasing your hand before tenderly wrapping your leg in an ace bandage. “it had to be done.”

“i know, it’s just…” you took a deep breath. “damn,” you both laughed at that.

“okay,” steve breathed out, “all done now,” he bent down and placed a soft kiss to your knee as if he kissed it all better.

“thanks,” you smiled before he placed his hands back on your waist, carefully guiding you down. you didn’t have much time before hopper came barging into the house, telling the kids to get away from the windows.

you and steve marched out of the bathroom, you still rolling your pant leg down before they brought an unconscious will back into the house. you swiftly picked up your metal pipe as steve did his nailed bat, nancy held a rifle, hopped held his own gun, and you waited. waited for something, anything.

you turned where each noise came from, hoping to catch it before it caught you.

“where are they?”

“what’re they doing?”

then the noises stopped. you all panned the area, trying to get a feel for where they went. then a demodog came flying through the window.

“holy shit.” you said in unison with dustin.

“is it dead?” max wondered.

when hopper shoved its head with his foot, we were assured it had died. but then the lock on the door came undone. it seemed as though you could never catch a break in this town. a girl began walking through the door, converse clad with a nosebleed.

mike stepped forward, clearly having a close relationship with the girl. it was like watching the sweetest of reunions.

you turned to max, “is that-“

“el?” she finished for you

“y-yea,” lucas answered. “it is.”

“i never gave up,” mike said. “i called you every night-every night for-“

“353 days,” el nodded. “i heard,” she stepped closer to him, still not believing he was finally in front of her after almost a year

“why didn’t you let me know you were there?” he seemed hurt.

“because i wouldn’t let her,” hopper spoke up, stepping forward in the group.

part of you felt as though you shouldn’t be seeing this. you were so new to the group, you felt wrong witnessing such a seemingly tender moment.

“the hell is this,” hopper began to question el. “where’ve you been?”

“where have you been?!” she retorted, a bit snappy. you liked her.

they responded with a hug, tears began to prick your eyes a little before mike ruined the moment.

“you’ve been hiding her,” he concluded. “you’ve been hiding her this whole time!” he punctuated with a shove to hoppers back.

“hey,” hopper grasped his wrists. “let’s talk. alone.”

he led mike into a room, away from the group to discuss things with a bit more privacy. in the meantime, lucas and dustin began to say their hellos to the girl.

“we talked about you basically every day,” dustin mentioned, leaving el to stare at him before tapping his teeth.

“teeth.”

“huh?” lucas and dustin wondered.

“you have teeth,” el rephrased, a bit confused as to why he had teeth.

“oh,” dustin remembered. “you like these pearls?” he began to purr? you think that’s what that was. it clearly surprised el.

max began to walk towards the girl, “eleven?” the girl just stared at max. “hey, um, i’m max,” she stuck out her hand, “i’ve heard a lot about you.”

el just walked past her, rejecting not only a handshake but what seemed like a friendship. but, el wandered into joyce’s welcoming arms.

“what was that?” you questioned.

“i-i don’t know?” max wondered herself, not knowing where she had gone wrong with the incredibly short interaction.

and with the return of eleven, it was as though the master key to a house was returned. everything fell into place as she stated that she could close the gate. she could fix everything.

in order to get the mind flayer’s grasp off of will before eleven shut the gate, joyce, jonathan and nancy went to burn the mind flayer out of him.

meanwhile you were still at joyce’s with steve and the kids. you had been helping max and lucas clean up the living room while dustin and steve were, for some reason, putting the creature in the fridge. mike was just pacing. worrying.

“mike, would you just stop already?” lucas spoke up, somehow annoyed by his movement.

“you weren’t in there, okay, lucas,” mike shouted back. “that lab is swarming with hundreds of those dogs.

“demodogs!” dustin spoke from the kitchen.

“the chief will take care of her!” lucas tried to reason.

“like she needs protection,” you added.

“listen, dude, a coach calls a play in a game, bottom line, you execute it,” steve tried to reason. “all right?”

“okay first of all this isn’t some stupid sports game,” mike rebutted. “and second we’re not even in the game. we’re on the bench.”

“right-right,” steve tried to think of a come back. “so my point is…”

“there’s nothing for us to do,” you finished for him.

“that’s not entirely true,” dustin mentioned, clearly up to something. “i mean the demodogs have a hive mind. when they ran away from the bus, they were called away.”

“so if we get their attention,” lucas interjected.

“we draw them away from the lab,” max added.

“away from eleven,” you finished.

“yeah and then we all die,” steve tried to reason.

“well, that’s one point of view,” dustin retorted.

“no, that’s not a pint of view man,” steve said with an attitude. “it’s a fact.”

“i’ve got it!” mike went into another room, pointing to the drawings of the vines. “this is where hop dug the hole. this is where we get to the vines,” he began to move again. “here, right here. this is like a hub. so you’ve got all the tunnels feeding in here. i think if we set this on fire-“

“oh, yea, that’s a no,” steve interjected, a hand on his hips as he pointed to the child. you nudged steve with your arm, pulling him to the side.

“look, i know i don’t know much about this situation and everything,” you started. “but i don’t think they’ll be able to close the gate at all with all of those dogs for eleven to kill. it seemed like killing only one of them drained her a bit. mike said that place had hundreds, steve. it’s not just our lives on the line. it’s everyone’s.”

he wanted to listen to you. he wanted to help. and he wanted you to know that he cared about what you thought. but he promised them that he would keep the kids safe. he couldn’t break his promise.

while you were trying to reason with him, the kids were still plotting on how to distract the dogs. steve ran his hands through his hair before clapping, getting everyone’s attention.

“hey! hey! hey!!” he shouted. “this is not happening.”

“but-“

“no buts!” he scoffed “i promised to keep you shitheads safe and that’s exactly what i plan on doing. we’re staying here. on the bench. and we’re waiting for the starting team to do their job. does everybody understand that?”

“this isn’t even a stupid sports game!” mike reminded him.

“i said does everybody understand that?” steve repeated. “i need a yes.”

you opened your mouth to begin speaking when you heard a familiar engine revving outside of the house. you and max ran to the couch to peer outside and see who was out there.

“shit,” you turned to max. “billy.”

“he’ll kill us if he knows we’re here,” max told lucas.

“just-just stay inside,” steve motioned to you and max. “both of you, please,” the look in his eyes told you he was serious.

you placed max behind your back and nodded to him, knowing that if he saw you would would know max was with you.

you didn’t know or hear anything that was going on outside. you were just pacing around the living room, trying to remain calm. steve could handle this.

then you saw all the kids duck down from the couch.

“what the fuck guys?” you scoffed at them. “max did he see you?!” the door slammed open, billy walking inside.

“well, well, well,” billy scowled. “lucas sinclair. what a surprise. i thought i told you to stay away from him max,” he said as he got closer to your sister, you were both able to feel his breath on your skin.

“and i thought i told you to brush your teeth this morning,” you got between him and the children.

“she knows what happens when she disobeys me,” he chuckled. “i break things.”

he immediately turned towards lucas before you could move him out of the way. billy had your shirt collar in his hands, shoving you towards the wall before he laid a punch on your cheek.

the kids were screaming, begging for him to stop. he wouldn’t listen after throwing two punches, feeling blood trickling down your nose, he held you tightly once more.

“what is it with that fucking mouth of yours huh?” he chuckled. “always such a bitch. i would imagine that your new boyfriend, harrington would like you much more if you would just keep it shut like a good little bitch, huh?”

“you’re the bitch,” you heard steve announce before he laid a fat one on billy’s cheek, shocking his grip off of you.

you nearly fell to the ground, your balance being less than stellar with your leg already hurting. max was there to help you balance, wrapping her arm around your waist.

“looks like you finally got some fire in you after all, huh?” billy began laughing maniacally. “i’ve been waiting to meet this king steve everybody’s been telling me so much about!” he walked closer to steve.

“get out,” steve ordered.

billy swung, steve ducked to miss the shot before landing another one of his own, sending billy across the room. he landed a couple more blows before billy grabbed a plate, smashing it over steve’s head. steve stumbled out of the room, trying to catch his breath while billy followed.

“nobody,” he picked steve up by his collar. “nobody tells me what to do,” he threw him to the ground.

you could sense that he was about to pound on top of steve, so you shoved billy out of the way, reminding him of your presence to shift his focus. maybe steve would be alright if you were able to distract him for long enough.

“look,” billy chuckled. “little princess with the hurt leg wants to save her boyfriend,” he kicked the hurt leg, sending you falling to the ground, but not before grasping one of billy’s legs, taking him with you.

with billy now on the ground, you rolled on top of him, sending a punch to his cheek. you winded your hand back, ready to send another one before he caught your hand, squeezing it so tight you swear your heard some bones pop.

“he’s-“ you tried to speak through the pain, tears running down your face. “he’s not,” you yanked his hair back with your free hand, shocking him enough to retrieve your hand. “he’s not my boyfriend.”

“right,” he smiled with his head back before spinning you two back over, him now on top of you before landing another punch on your cheek. “he never would be, huh?” another punch. “you’re not good enough for anyone in this goddamn town, as terrible as it is. not good enough for anybody anywhere. you’re just a little girl with daddy issues,” he put his face in your own. “trying to feel love even though you know you’ll never deserve it,” he began chuckling, brushing your hair behind your ear. “you’ll always be that pathetic little whore deep down, huh?”

tears were now flowing down your face, embarrassment long forgotten from the pure pain and torture you felt beneath the boy you should’ve trusted. the boy you were supposed to be able to call a brother. as he spat in your face, you realized he had a hold on one of your hands.

he used the free one to land one more blow to your face before steve tackled him off of you. max had immediately come to your aid, but it wasn’t long before billy was back on top of steve. you pointed to steve, then to the shelf that had the sedative.

“use it,” you nodded towards max.

she marched towards the shelf, grabbing the medicine before shoving it in the back of billy’s neck. he quickly got off of steve, turning to face max. you couldn’t hear what was going on, the ringing in your ears a bit too loud. you saw billy hit the floor, smiling with what seemed like laughter before you hobbled up, grabbing steve’s nailed bat before raising it over your shoulder.

“from here on out you will leave max and her friends alone, got it?” you asked.

he just laughed.

you swung the bat right between his legs, underneath his dick before screaming, “say you understand! say it!”

“i understand,” he finally mustered up the courage to speak.

“sorry, what was that,” you wanted him to be louder.

“i understand!”

“good,” you dropped the bat to your side before grabbing the keys from his belt loop. “joy ride, anyone?” you put on as good of a smile as you could while holding the keys up.

you had told max to drive, your leg still absolutely killing you. you sat in the back, steve’s head on your lap as you doctored up his wounds. it was the hydrogen peroxide that made him wake up.

“shh,” you whispered. “i know, i know,” you ran your hands through his hair.

“y/n?” you nodded at his question.

“let me just clean you up a bit, alright?” you finished pouring the peroxide, letting him squeeze your hand to return the favor from earlier before placing a dab of neosporin and a bandage over each cut while the kids were navigating.

you were paying attention to his wounds but he was paying attention to you. how careful you were. how soft your hands felt on his face, how nice they felt in his hair. was his head on your thighs? they were comfy. soft. he could stay like this forever. until he realized…

“oh my god!” he shouted, moving him from his daydream and back into reality.

“relax, she’s driven before,” dustin tried to convince steve it was fine.

“in a parking lot!” mike added.

steve kept chanting, ‘oh my god,’ as max drove, each of the kids trying to calm him down. it was all stressful and probably too loud for his head. there was definitely a concussion, you just weren’t sure how bad it was.

“everyone shut up!” you ordered. “steve, i couldn’t drive. the douchebag hurt my leg even more, i told her she could, she’s really not too bad. now you have got to breath before you put yourself in worse condition than you already are, got it?” you told him, hands placed softly on both sides of his face to ground his attention.

he nodded, taking a deep breath as you animated with him.

“your face,” he reached up to cup your face, you leaned into his touch.

this one time.

“i’m sorry i didn’t stop him sooner…”

“it’s not your fault, steve,” you gave him a small smile. “billy’s just a douche,” you shrugged. “besides, now i can say that i’ve been in a fight.”

you swore he was leaning into you until max nearly missed her left turn, hitting a mailbox and nearly crashing the car. steve’s arms were flailing everywhere until he wrapped one around your shoulder and the other around your waist.

“jesus, max!” you huffed out. “make a liar out of me, why don’t ya?”

a sigh of relief fell upon the entire group as she put the car in park. “i told ya. zoomer,” she added.

“zoomer?” steve asked you, you laughed and placed your hand over his mouth to shut him up for a moment.

you and the kids got everything out of the car, the masks and goggles to protect yourselves. steve was stumbling out of the car, mumbling about how he told you not to go in there, saying that it wasn’t gonna happen.

“look, steve,” you took your metal pipe out of the trunk. “either you stay here and watch the car or something while i make sure they stay safe or you come with us and help me. your decision,” you shoved his backpack in his direction, along with his nailed bat, before hobbling after the kids.

“y/n,” steve called you back. “you’re hurt. your leg. is this really the best decision?”

“it’s the only decision, steve,” you shook your head. “regardless of whether or not you’re going down there, my sister is not going without me. got it, steve?” he nodded. “good.”

steve jumped in the hole before you, able to catch you so you wouldn’t hurt your leg even more with the impact of landing. you quickly took your hands from his shoulders to turn and observe the tunnels.

“yea i’m pretty sure it’s this way,” mike said, his voice slightly muffled by the bandana around his nose and mouth.

“you’re pretty sure or are you certain?” dustin demanded to know.

“im 100 percent sure!” mike rephrased. “just follow me and you’ll know!” mike began to lead the group.

“woah! woah! woah! hey, hey, hey!” steve shouted. “i don’t think so,” he said as he caught up with mike, leaving max to be your crutch beside you.

“what?” mike questioned.

“any of you little dipshits die down here and i get the blame,” steve said. “got it, dipshit?” you rolled your eyes. “here on out, i’m leading the way. come on, let’s go.”

“my god, what is this place?” you looked around. it seemed like a cave that had little extensions.

“alright let’s keep moving!” steve ordered, moving ahead quickly.

“ahh shit!” you heard dustin’s scream “it’s in my mouth! holy shit it’s in my mouth! ahhh!”

you all ran to where he was, you got on the ground next to him, he grasped your arm as he kept trying to spit it out on the ground, coughing before sitting back up.

“i’m okay,” he breathed out.

“seriously?” you shoved him back before steve held out his hand to help you up, letting his hand linger around your waist.

“really funny man,” steve sassed. “nice, very nice.”

this time he let his hand on your waist guide you through the tunnels beside him, albeit a bit worried about something happening to you. you didn’t mind, you felt max’s presence right behind you.

“alright wheeler,” steve announced. “i think we’ve found your hub.”

it was huge. like a big cave with little extensions in every direction. the little particles dancing around made it hard to see, even still with your adjusted eyes.

“drench it,” mike said.

you all began pouring the flammable liquid you had gathered everywhere, making sure to cover as much surface as possible. this thing would burn. and you wanted to make sure of it.

“you guys ready?” you asked, they all nodded. you turned to steve, his nod ensuring that they were ready before you flicked the flame alive, tossing it onto the ground.

immediately the vines began to come to life, screeching from pain and writhing, trying to escape it.

“let’s go,” steve yelled. “let’s go! let’s go! lets go!” he ushered the kids away, you not too far behind him.

when mike tripped, screaming for help, you were able to whack the vine with your metal pipe, sending it screeching back away from his leg, you ordered the others to keep running before a dog came before you.

“dart?”dustin had asked. “is that you buddy?”

“dustin-“

“trust me!” dustin ordered. “hey, it’s me, it’s me. it’s just your friend. it’s dustin,” he took his goggles off to prove it to the creature. “just dustin, all right? you remember me,” he crouched down to the dog’s level. “will you let us pass?”

the dog snarled at him, seemingly telling the child no.

“okay, okay. i’m sorry,” dustin tried to reason. “i’m sorry about the storm cellar. i know it was a pretty douchey thing to do. you hungry?” he reached into his backpack. “yea? i’ve got our favorite. see? nougat,” dustin began to unwrap the candy for the dog to eat, placing on the ground. “look at that. yummy. here, all right,” he backed away from the dog, waving for everyone to pass the creature while he was occupied. “there’s plenty, i’ve got more,” he offered.

you began to ignore his reunion, instead ensuring that max got across safely, your hand on the square of her back as steve led the group at the front. dustin quickly earned his footing ahead of you before you saw the rope.

steve began lifting the kids up the rope as he heard the roaring of the dogs. first max, then lucas, mike, dustin, then the dogs were too close.

“steve?” you looked at him, tears pricking the corners of your eyes.

he grasped your hand, “i’ve got you,” but you opted for wrapping your arms around his torso, his going around your shoulders. you tucked your head into his chest before realizing that they hadn’t attacked you. they were going around.

“eleven,” mike realized.

steve was able to hoist you up, letting the rest of the kids help pull you up before he grasped your hand, you and the kids doing the same for him. once you were all on safe, solid, normal ground, you noticed the headlights of the car getting increasingly bright. eleven was doing her thing. you had helped.

-

one broken tibia and a month later, hawkins was seemingly ‘normal’ again. you were adorned in a pretty little cast while waiting for max outside of the snow ball dance. you think her and lucas will kiss, she might’ve mentioned wanting to during one of your sleepovers.

you were parked outside of the school, reading the shining for what felt like the 50th time, when a car parked next to your own. you looked across and saw none other than steve harrington in the drivers seat, a dorky grin on his face as he waited for you to wave your hand and motion for him to join you in your car.

“hey,” he opened the door and plopped in. “so, uhhh…”

“yes?” you asked, wanting to know why he had that dopey grin on his face. while it was an obnoxiously cute grin, you still wanted to know what put it there.

“how’s the leg?” he motioned to the one that was bent in your seat, still a bit of grief hit him when he remembers how hurt you had gotten that night.

“y’know,” you shrugged. “it’ll be fine. hurts like hell, though.”

“i’m sorry,” he dropped eye contact with you, opting to look at his hands that were currently cupping his knees.

“for what?” you chuckled. “you didn’t do this.”

“yea but,” he breathed out. “i could’ve. i saw billy when he-he shoved your leg in. you have no idea how-how angry that made me. and how he spoke to you? i just… you are deserving of-“

“hold it, steve,” you put your hand up. “i don’t need you to give me this whole ‘pity speech’ about how i deserve love and how im not broken, okay?” you rolled your eyes. “i know i am and im fine with that. what i don’t need is some guy who thinks he knows me try to tell me that im good enough for him or for anyone else. because frankly, i don’t-i don’t even feel that way, okay? so, please,” you felt tears prick your eyes. “don’t bring that back up. because bill-billy somehow knows my deepest thoughts and fears and i-i don’t want anyone else to even think about them. i just can’t handle it right now.”

“y/n,” he grasped your hand with his own. “it’s okay. it’s okay to not be able to handle something-especially after what you’ve been through,” he brought your hand to his lips. “i care about you. i want you to be able to talk through it, even if it isn’t with me.”

“i can’t,” you shook your head. “i can’t talk to max about this. i don’t want her to see me like this.”

“then she doesn’t have to, okay?” he reached across the console and wrapped his arms around you, letting you cry on his shoulder. “i’m here, it’s okay.”

“it’s just…” you dragged on. “home isn’t good. it’s not even a home. i just try to make sure max is never in the mix when things go down but then i-then,” you choked on a sob before he continued to stroke your back.

he pulled back after a second, “if you and max ever need to just… escape, you know my door is always open,” his eyes searched yours for some sort of confirmation but found a bit of weariness. “my parents are like never home, so you won’t really have to worry about them not wanting you guys around.”

“i wouldn’t want to do that to you,” you shook your head, insistent on the idea that you would be too close to a burden on him.

“do what?” he scoffed with a smile. “rid me of my… i’ll admit, loneliness?”

“steve harrington? the king of hawkins high, lonely?” you rolled your eyes. “yea, i’ll believe it when i see it.”

“then you will come over?” he acknowledged with a shit-eating grin. “see the loneliness, first-hand?”

“maybe, steve,” you sighed. “maybe.”

and maybe you should’ve let yourself hold onto him a little longer. you should’ve let your walls down for him. but you couldn’t. you barely knew him. well, you knew him now. but not outside of trying to save the world. you didn’t know how he was when he was sick. you didn’t know his favorite color.

so for tonight, you let yourself feel. you let yourself weep and break and crumble apart in steve harrington’s arms. chances are he would forget what even happened the next day anyway.

this one time.

tomorrow came. and no sign of steve. then the next, then the next. for some reason you felt disappointed. after everything… no.

you don’t need him. you don’t want him. you are perfect without him. your walls are still intact. you have yourself. that’s all you need.

but max, well, max needed you. sometimes she wouldn’t admit it, but she really did need you. so, you were there.

you drove her to the arcade the fifth day, deciding to stick around and watch her do her thing from inside, cheering her on and handing her more quarters once she ran out.

when you heard the other heathens arrive, you knew who was dropping them off. you opted to not even look out of the glass door. he doesn’t need to know you’ve even thought of his name. maybe you have a bit too much.

“y/n,” steve’s voice rang through your ears. you turned to face him with an obviously forced grin. “sorry i never called, my-“

“oh, doesn’t matter, harrington,” you shrugged. “all is well.”

“i just thought that you maybe wanted to talk since…” he dragged on, not wanting to spill too much with this many ears around.

“look, harrington,” you turned to actually look him in his eyes. “i get that we got a bit close and all because of some life or death situations but you don’t need to pretend to care or be my friend anymore. i just-i need to make sure max is taken care of, and that takes a lot more work than you would think,” you chuckled, trying to break the bridge before your walls became irreplaceable to the brown haired boy before you.

“i was never pretending, y/n,” his eyebrows furrowed at your word-vomit taking a step closer to you while reaching for your hand. “you realize i just want to help, i want to be there for you.”

“i don’t need anyone,” you shook your head, pulling your hand away from his. “i’m fine, harrington. i’ve been fine without someone this far, and i’ll continue to be fine.”

“you deserve to be better than fine, y/n,” he argued, letting your hand fall from his own, as much as he missed its warmth. “and what-what’s happened to ‘steve’? what’s with this ‘harrington’ bullshit again?”

“it’s your name,” you shrugged, avoiding eye contact with the man in front of you. you could feel how close you were to caving in. but you couldn’t. you just… you couldn’t risk it. “i’ll use it how i please.”

“when you decide you want to be more than fine,” he sighed, knowing how stubborn you were. “i’ll always be here. waiting for you.”

you turned around before saying with tears in your eyes, “don’t hold your breath, harrington.”

you felt his hand linger over your shoulder, hesitating to leave his touch before you felt the warmth of his presence retreat. the only sign that told you he was surely gone was the ring of the bell on that glass door and the revving engine of his car.

you wouldn’t have noticed if the glass door had shattered as distracted as you were with the feeling of your own heart doing the same. this wasn’t supposed to hurt. you weren’t supposed to feel anything. but now you felt everything. from the one night, that was supposed to only be one time. so why did you want him all the time?

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve #steve harrington x fem!reader #steve harrington x mayfield!reader #max’s older sister #stranger things fic #stranger things #steve harrington fic #steve harrington angst #steve harrington x reader angst

[breakfastteatime]

hope you don't mind the rant but argh i finally realised why i feel so disconnected to survivor in comparison to how close jfo is to me

spoilers for those who haven't played survivor

but i really dislike major decisions made and i'm gonna babble on a little (i've had like eight panadol and two sleeping meds as of the last hour n a half so if this doesn't make sense that's why)

one that's been swirling around my head ever since i played us that it really felt like they brought cordova back JUST to kill him off. this also ties into my next point that i find bode's betrayal hard to believe as well. every role he had in the story could easily be replaced by someone such as cere, and i felt like the only reason he was there was to have someone for bode to kill to show how really evil he was but respawn didn't want to kill any of the main cast off. he's such a useless character in the plot that killing him off didnt effect anything LMAO

my next major dislike is, understandably, about bode :,) yes i know this can come off as making excuses for a character i was attached to since the trailers dropped but the more i think about it the more i really cannot understand both the timeline and the motive that was behind bode's betrayal. i kind of get the idea he was lax about betraying them UNTIL cal mentioned using tanalorr for the hidden path but according to the echoes you get after the game bodenis plotting and scheming the whole time... plus, you think that his whole motive relies on creating a safe place for kata on tanalorr where no one can find them but also like. you have two (technically three) jedi, a nightsister, and a whole clan of anchorites that kick the empire's ass every day. "will you be able to protect her when the empire comes?" fuckass have you SEEN cal use a lightsaber?? kata is safer with cal then she is bode

dagan was hella underwhelming too which disappointed me tbh i was excited for this high republic jedi to show us all this cool stuff only for him to die in like three seconds 😔

ANYWAY i hope this ain't too long but i'd love to hear your thoughts/criticisms on js bc i love the game and all the little bits are amazing but some of the decisions made have me a bit hrghh

Okay, friend, you asked for it ;)

The decision to bring back Cordova was an unexpected one, but the sight of him makes me cry happy tears every damn time, so it doesn't bother me at all. I take your point re: Cere being able to do everything he does, but part of Bode’s betrayal also hinges on him betraying Cere to Vader, who clearly wants vengeance after Nur (which is SO IN CHARACTER for Vader I can only lol. Petty bitch.), so Bode killing her wouldn't have had quite the same impact.

Because I was so convinced he was dead that him *actually* being dead didn’t strike me as ‘brought back only to die’. I would argue that killing him off did put them at risk of not being able to reach Tanalorr and defintely drove Cal to Nova Garon, but yes… Cordova's character probably lacks development and definitive purpose compared to the others… Although even as I say that, I find myself thinking of the logs he left behind in the various ruins on Jedha and the words of advice and I just can’t get mad. Plus there's that teeny hint that he's been unwell when Merrin asks how he's feeling. I see your points, yes, but I'm not too fussed by any of it.

Moving onto Bode...

So, here’s my interpretation of Bode, based on the post-game echoes and the little nuances that take on a totally new light on a replay. Bode is playing Cal from the very beginning. They are never friends from Bode’s perspective, and he is a master manipulator. He’s a textbook abuser – he lovebombs Cal with compliments and praise to cement their relationship, and does the same with everyone in his family. Plus, he used his knowledge of Cere’s location to further his cause with the Empire.

There’s also a power dynamic at play here because Bode was a Jedi Knight during the war while Cal was still a Padawan. Bode is older and more experienced with the world than Cal. He knows Cal longs for friendship, and he wields that against him more effectively than any weapon. Every action, every word, every choice Bode makes is solely to dig in deeper with Cal so he can and Kata can escape the Empire. Had Cal agreed that Tanalorr would just be for them, *maybe* Bode wouldn’t have betrayed him the way he did, but Bode is well on his way to the dark side because of his attachment to Kata. And Cal very nearly follows him because of his attachments to his family.

To me, this is what the Jedi Order meant by 'no attachments'. Jedi are allowed to love, but when that love becomes all consuming, when it becomes an obsession, that’s when the attachment becomes dangerous. Bode’s story is very similar to Anakin’s, he’s just not as powerful. Hasn’t got those Skywalker genes 😉  

Bode’s motive to me is clear – he *thinks* everything is about Kata, but actually it’s all about him. It’s about his grief and rage and fear because of his wife's death the terrible choices he made. Denvik promises that if Bode gives him what he wants (Cal and Cere), he will reveal which Inquistor murdered his wife. Bode is already in it for revenge, not his daughter's wellbeing. His choices are very pre-meditated. He is a parent, yes, and I can understand that overriding love of a child, but he is also a grieving husband who is so broken by his loss that his love for Kata has become too possessive. He is terrified of losing his daughter, and it eclipses his love for her. Kata is aware of this, and her love is also turning to fear. Bode is neglectful (he's always leaving Kata behind) and bordering on abusive at the end. He trusts no one but himself, and he even asks Cal at the very end if he can protect Kata. Cal says nothing because he knows he can’t – he’s tried protecting so many people, and he’s lost nearly all of them. He won’t make a promise he can’t keep, and that’s what completely breaks Bode. Bode doesn’t believe anyone *but him* can protect Kata because he has become completely consumed with fear and anger. Cal gave him a chance to make a better choice when he disarmed him. In fact, Bode had *so many chances* to make a better choice, and he didn’t. So, when Bode responded by choosing to try and kill Cal, Merrin *and* very nearly his own daughter, Cal had no choice but to put him down – hard. That second shot took my breath away both times I played the game because Cal knows he cannot save Bode and protect the people who matter, and by showing Bode mercy, more people will die. It's also about control - Bode tries to control everyone. Cal knows he can't, so he takes the only option left - killing Bode. Honestly, the more I think about that finale, the more intense it becomes. It's an astonishing moment.

I do wonder if the reason people struggle with Bode is because he is so nice, and he fits in so well, but it’s all fake and it’s all an act. Whether you saw it coming or not, that hurts. Cal – and the player – want so badly for Bode to be better than he is, and that’s the tragedy. Bode’s not capable of that. He has suffered losses just like Cal, but he couldn’t overcome them. It’s a lot to deal with emotionally!

And as for Dagan, I quite like him! Mostly because that final battle with him incorporates my favourite Star Wars thing – WEIRD FORCE SHIT. He’s also a mirror held up to Cal – this is what you could become if your obsession takes over you. I also think his relationship with Santari Khri is meant to show Cal the potential pitfalls of his relationship with Merrin if his attachment overcomes him… but we’ll have to see what happens next…

Gosh this got long. It's always fun to see other people's perspectives and share my own! Hope you've got some rest and feel better soon :)

#jedi survivor spoilers #star wars jedi: survivor #jedi survivor meta #answered asks #bode akuna #cal kestis #dagan gera #eno cordova #long post #breakfast tea has THOUGHTS and FEELINGS #times like this I wish i had a youtube channel el oh el

[acourtofwhatthefuck]

Fireleaf (Part Four)

Lucien Vanserra x Reader

Part One - Part Two - Part Three -

As always, I am incredibly grateful for @greeneyedivy and her help AND patience with me lmao

Warnings: None for this part!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I decided I wanted to train after a young girl in our territory was attacked by a group of males.”

Three days later, Dion gently held your hand as the two of you strolled through the orchard at the back of the Vanserra Estate, Barric always remaining mere feet away. The sounds and smells of the festival reached out to you from across the sprawling green; a constant reminder that you were only halfway through the second week, and days of posturing still lay ahead.

“Did you know her?” Dion asked, his thumb brushing the back of your hand. “The girl?”

You shook your head. “Not really. Only that she was the younger sister of a female I took my schooling with. But I think it hitting so close to home was what made the decision for me. I knew that if I ever, the Mother forbid, found myself in that situation…I didn’t want to be unable to defend myself. And a good friend to our family is a master swordsman, so I knew I need only ask and he would help. I found that him teaching me gave me purpose.”

And now your only purpose was to be a submissive bride – something that turned your stomach. It was undoubtedly risky, having this conversation with Barric so near…information that he could report back to the High Lord…but you found it gave you a little slither of satisfaction to push those barriers. And Dion seemed utterly invested in your stories, anyway.

“The swordsman,” He said, “that was the male I saw you training with that day on your estate?”

A smile lifted your lips as you thought of Linden. His brown skin and dark, kind eyes. The way his long hair was always so perfectly, intricately braided, and he would twist those braids into a knot atop of his head whenever you got down to the fun bits of your training. His quiet, assessing nature – forever contrasted by the wicked sense of humour, the ability to wrangle a laugh from you on even your worst days. You missed him. So much, it hurt.

“That was him.” You nodded. “He’s a good friend.”

Dion’s eyes seem to study your face, his hand idly swinging yours. You wondered what he was thinking, what he might say — until Barric stepped closer.

“We should head back to the festival.” He said. “You don’t want to raise any eyebrows by sneaking off so much.”

Dion’s head fell into a playful tilt, a wicked grin playing on his lips. “Did we sneak, Y/N?”

You snorted, mirroring him. “I don’t recall sneaking.”

Barric rolled his eyes. He seemed to be growing tired of the habit you and Dion had developed of tormenting him. Only yesterday, the two of you had launched into a run whilst Barric hadn’t been looking, and hid inside one of the estate’s disused barns. It had taken the advisor forty minutes to find you — and he wasn’t best pleased when he did.

“Let’s just go before people begin speculating about what the two of you are up to.” Barric said, striding ahead.

Dion was still laughing as he laced your fingers together and pulled you along. It was only when you’d emerged from the orchard, halfway across the lawn, the festival once more in sight, that he pulled you to a stop again. Barric was accosted by a passing courtier, and Dion took the opportunity to speak without guarding himself.

“You know,” His voice was deep, quiet, his brown eyes staring into yours, “I’m very much looking forward to when I actually get your company…alone.”

You gazed up at him, your cheeks reddening just slightly. It was probably the most forward he’d been with you, and you weren’t quite sure what to say in response. But then he was turning, tugging on your hand once more.

“Come on.” He grinned. “There’s a dagger-throwing game over there. Show me what you can do before anyone swarms us.”

You followed, your cheeks still heated.

⤲

One more. You had only one more target to hit, and it’d be a full house.

These games were notoriously hard. Enchanted so that the targets moved lightning-fast, it would take a skilled marksman to strike true on one, let alone all of them.

And that was where all those gruelling training sessions with Linden came in handy. Dion was grinning like a Cheshire Cat beside you.

You planted your feet – levelled your stance and focused your gaze. The target whizzed by before you once, twice, but you were waiting for the moment it felt right to strike, trusting your gut. A few spectators had stopped to gawk at you – a fact you knew you’d probably regret later, if it got back to your parents, or Beron, but – currently, none of the three were in sight. And you were having fun.

“Hit this last target,” Dion said quietly at your shoulder, “and I’ll marry you on the spot.”

You snorted, your cheeks tinging with pink. “Don’t distract me.”

“Sorry, Lady.” The grin in his voice didn’t make him sound very sorry at all.

You pursed your lips. Narrowed your eyes. The other five targets continued to move, daggers protruding from their centres. You were unblinking from the very last one that remained unhit.

It whizzed past in a flash – and you struck. A wide grin tugged at your lips as the dagger cartwheeled towards it, its point lodging right in the centre. The male tending the stall blinked at you, his eyes flickering from your hands, to the targets, back to your hands – looking for any indication that you’d used magic and cheated.

He would find none. The only magic that had aided you was Linden’s flawless training.

“Holy Gods,” Dion came to stand in front of you, his eyes glinting, his grin lupine. “Remind me not to get on your bad side.”

You couldn’t help matching the wide smile that lit up his face so beautifully. The last few days, it had consistently been like this – in his company, anyway. Fun. Distracting. You almost forgot that you hadn’t chosen this for yourself.

“Incredible.” He murmured, his hand brushing yours.

“Pick a prize.” The male behind the stall said, gesturing vaguely to the bizarre mishmash of prizes behind him. The slight pinch in his expression made you wonder how often he actually parted with them. “Any prize.”

Your eyes roved over the items crowding the shelves behind him; cheap jewellery and good-luck charms that probably had no luck to them whatsoever, painted masks and garlands intertwined with potent herbs, a row of bottles housing various different drinks…and food. Little paper bags holding sweets and chocolates and tarts and nuts.

“A bag of the honey-roasted plums.” You said, shooting a grin at Dion. “For your sweet tooth.”

The way his eyes flashed…it was like you’d offered him the entire world up on a platter. Like nobody had ever truly gifted him something before – even a bag of honey-roasted plums, magicked to stay fresh. Grabbing your hand boldly, he dug into his pocket and produced a coin, chucking it to the vendor.

“Throw in a couple of bottles of that cider,” His smile was so charming, the vendor accepted the coin right away, turning straight to the shelves behind him. “Thank you.”

As you waited, you couldn’t help studying him – the male you were engaged to wed. Had it really only been a week and a half since you’d arrived? It was strange, but…you just felt so comfortable. Like you were merely holidaying here, spending your days with an old friend who made you laugh, who you could talk to for hours. He made it…easy.

But you were no fool. The festivities would be over with a final bonfire night in two days, the estate emptying of the many people who had crowded it every day for the last two weeks. The stalls would be gone, and the distractions gone with them – and the atmosphere would change, no doubt. Your wedding planning would begin.

“Where did you go?” Dion’s fingers gently flicked your forehead. His eyes stared warmly down at you. “I lost you for a second there.”

You shook out of your thoughts. Shook your head. “Zoned out. I’m–”

“Damn. All six targets?”

The two of you turned to find Lucien behind you, staring at the stall, the daggers that had hit every mark.

You hadn’t seen him since the other night, when he’d saved you from walking straight into the waiting jaws of that Autumn Court creature. And you were glad, too, considering there was nothing at all pleasant about speaking to the youngest Vanserra.

Well – aside of his scent, that immediately hit you right then, just as potent as it had been three nights before; earthy and stark and fucking delicious. And his golden skin, such a different shade to that of his brothers’. His hair that he preferred to leave unbound, whereas the others habitually tied theirs back. The brown of his eyes that was slightly darker, deeper, than theirs. The way one cheek dimpled when he spoke—

“I see you’ve improved your aim, brother,” Lucien spoke solely to Dion, not even glancing at you. “It only took you…what? Over a century?”

“Me?” Dion snorted. “I didn’t throw those, Loosh. As much as I’d love to take the credit, I can’t. It was all Y/N.”

There was no missing the way Lucien blinked, his gaze darting to you, his lips slightly parting. But you barely let your eyes flit over him as you turned back to the vendor, accepting the items he handed you, and angling yourself towards Dion.

“Come on,” You said, handing him one of the bottles. “Let’s find somewhere to drink these.”

With a warm smile, Dion clapped his brother on the shoulder as the two of you passed. You didn’t bother to shoot Lucien your own smile – didn’t see the point.

Within the seconds, the mass of people roaming the lawn was swallowing you and Dion up. He grabbed your hand, lacing your fingers together as you headed for the quieter sprawl of green, nearer to the trees.

And you couldn’t be sure, but…you could have sworn you felt an intense pair of russet eyes burning holes into your back the entire way.

⤲

The sun was pleasantly warm, even with the autumn chill in the air. You and Dion sat with your backs against the tree, talking around mouthfuls of honey-roasted plums and the apple-and-toffee cider he’d bought.

“I believed you when you said you’d trained,” Dion said, digging into the small paper bag that had held the plums. He split the last one in half, handing one half to you. “But I didn’t expect you to be that good.”

You playfully rolled your eyes – but still blushed at the compliment. “It was just a festival game. I’m hardly on my way to being a skilled swordwielder.”

“You hit the third target without looking.” His eyes glittered. “I’d love to see what you can do with a sword. We’ll have to spar sometime.”

You laughed softly, eyes darting to the half-empty bottle in your hands. “I don’t think our parents would approve.”

“Surely your parents knew you were training with that male – Linden? Did they not approve then?”

Gods, how were you supposed to explain that your parents were simply…entirely different people back then? That once upon a time, they hadn’t cared whether you wanted to be a simpering bride or an unmarried female who dedicated her life to protecting people – all they’d wanted was for you to be healthy, to be happy. It seemed so long ago, now. You missed the days when you’d flounce home, dripping with sweat, heaving heavy breaths, your muscles sore and bruised, and your mother would merely roll her eyes affectionately and tell you to get in the bath.

You weren’t sure you wanted to talk about it. Weren’t sure you were ready to. But before you could admit that, the two of you were interrupted by the sudden invasion of raised, aggravated voices.

“I told you!” Willow’s voice reached you as she stormed through a copse of trees, her husband hot on her trail. “I specifically told you that I wouldn’t tolerate that. Did you think I was joking?”

Both you and Dion watched as they emerged. Your shoulders stiffened at the dark look of ire on Isaac’s face. You carefully placed your drink aside, readying to jump in. Neither of them seemed to have noticed the two of you were there.

“You’re overreacting,” Isaac spat. “As always. If I wanted to be coddled like this, I would have stayed at home with my mother and not married you.”

Willow pivoted abruptly to face him. “If I’m so bad, Isaac, go ahead and marry that fucking mistress. Believe me, I’m past caring what you and that pathetic excuse for a cock get up to.”

Isaac grabbed her so fast, so hard, you barely had a chance to register the movement before he was shoving her to the ground. “You foul-mouthed bitch–”

“Hey!” Within seconds, Dion was off the ground.

Within seconds, he was launching himself at your brother-in-law, grabbing him by the front of his shirt.

“Keep your gods-damn hands to yourself.” He spat – and Isaac had the good sense to look scared. “You think it’s acceptable to put your hands on her? Why don’t you go ahead and try it with me? Go ahead, Isaac – hit me.”

“Back off,” Isaac attempted to push him away – but faltered when Dion didn’t budge an inch. Even he wasn’t stupid enough to go head-to-head with a Vanserra.

You pushed your shock away long enough to scramble to your feet and hurry over to Willow, who was shifting onto her knees and rubbing dirt and pine needles from her hands. You knelt beside her, trying to ignore the growing, roaring rage inside your head as you pulled her close.

“He’s drunk.” Willow said to Dion, shooting a look of pure disgust at her husband. “I wouldn’t bother.”

“He’s a piece of shit, is what he is.” Finally, Dion released his firm grip from the front of Isaac’s shirt, sending him falling backwards. “Let me make something very clear to you, asshole. I’m going to arrange transport, and you’re going to get the fuck away from my family’s estate. You’re not welcome here again – and don’t even look at Willow. She isn’t coming with you. Do you understand?”

Isaac’s jaw clenched – but he knew what power Dion had. Knew that he was absolutely no match for the second-eldest son of the High Lord. He nodded resolutely, daring a glance at Willow.

“Get the fuck out of here, Isaac.” You snapped. “If you ever lay a finger on my sister again, I’ll make sure you regret it.”

The pathetic male rose to his feet, swaying on the spot. “You’re really not coming, Willow?”

Willow didn’t so much as glance at him. “I will travel home with my family at the end of the festival. And I’ll speak to you when I’m ready. Leave.”

He hesitated, looked like he wanted to argue, but – not with Dion there. You had no doubt that it’d be an entirely different matter if it were just you and Willow alone.

Muttering beneath his breath, he stormed off. Dion’s chest was heaving as he watched him, his eyes coloured with a darkness that hadn’t been there moments before. Whatever it was…you had a feeling it was personal. Something he needed to deal with on his own.

“Are you hurt?” You turned back to Willow, removing a few pine needles from the strands of her hair.

“No,” She shook her head. “He didn’t push me that hard.”

“He shouldn’t push you at all.” Dion’s voice was lethally quiet, utterly cutting, as he turned to both of you. In the week and a half that you’d spent with him, you’d only ever heard the tuneful lilt he always spoke with.

Willow chewed her lip, staring wide-eyed up at him. “Thank you – for stepping in. I really appreciate it.”

He swallowed, his eyes shuttering. Dipped his chin. And then tautly ground out, “I’ll go arrange the transport to get him the fuck out of here.”

Without another glance at you, he strode off, his body rigid, his face shadowed by…something. He wasn’t the relaxed, laughing male he’d been moments before. You and Willow both stared after him.

“Is he alright?” She asked softly.

Honestly, you didn’t know – but it wasn’t for her to worry about. You brushed the remaining dirt from her hands, helping her to her feet. “I’m sure he will be. Come on – let’s get some tea.”

But she was still staring after him – not Isaac, but Dion. Her wide, blue eyes lingering on where his figure had retreated. Her lips were slightly parted, her brows pinched.

“He’s…kind.” She said softly, as though such a thing – a kind male – were an alien concept.

“He is.” You nodded, linking your arm through hers. “This way.”

She followed, not saying another word. And perhaps it was just the shock…something that needed to subside...but the way she kept looking over her shoulder didn’t seem to be in fear. It took you a while to work it out, as you led her through the manor and arranged some sweet, hot tea to settle her nerves.

She was looking around in utter awe.

Looking around for Dion.

⤲

Your good mood was borne entirely of relief. And perhaps with a little helping of wine.

Finally, you’d reached the last day of the festival. Multiple bonfires had been built, ready for lighting. Huge wooden kegs of ale and cider and wine had been lined up, and cheery music echoed through the night from the small circle of musicians playing nearby.

The atmosphere, you had to admit, was brilliant. But for you – bittersweet.

You were looking forward to some quiet. To not having to slap a smile on and float around, talking to strangers all day. But it had also been the one obstacle between you and your wedding planning.

After tonight, that obstacle would be gone. You would have nothing else to cling to, nowhere else you could hide from it.

But you were trying to enjoy yourself as you accepted the drinks Dion brought you, and the two of you floated amongst the dancers and revellers, the people circling the pyres, the familiar faces of people you’d seen many times over the past couple of weeks.

The shadow that had passed over Dion after the run-in with Isaac had lingered for the rest of that day, but he’d risen the following morning with the light returned to his eyes — and even apologised to you that you’d had to see him like that. You hadn’t hesitated to tell him that he had nothing to apologise for; that you were grateful beyond words, that he’d stepped in and defended your sister without a second thought.

And Willow, you knew, was just as grateful. Perhaps more so. Isaac had left the estate that same day, and it was like a weight had been lifted from Willow’s shoulders. Over the next two days, she was the happiest, the lightest you’d seen her, since she’d arrived. It was just a crying shame that she was only beginning to enjoy herself at the end of the festival.

But tonight, there was no room for bad feelings. You nursed your wine and watched the musicians transition from one song to the next, each one seeming to become more frenzied and upbeat, coaxing people to dance. The bonfires burned as brilliantly as the flashes of Vanserra hair around you, and the crisp, smoky smell of them shoved its way up your nose, reminding you of—

Your eyes flicked around the crowded area. You weren’t sure why you searched for Lucien’s presence — why you were even bothered about whether or not he was here.

A soft smile pulled at your lips as you glimpsed Willow throwing her head back, an unguarded laugh leaving her lips at something Dion had said to her. It pleased you beyond words — seeing your sister enjoy herself like that.

Because when your family all left tomorrow morning and travelled back to your — their — territory…when they left you behind, here, in your new home — you didn’t know when you might next see them. When you might next hear Willow laugh.

Perhaps at your wedding. The thought was enough to have you draining your wine chalice and turning back to the keg.

And standing there, face pinched in concentration as she filled her own challice up, was a familiar girl. Blonde and pretty. It took a moment for you to place her, to remember where you’d seen her before.

Being shoved against a tree. Lucien Vanserra’s hungry hands roaming her, his lips bruising hers.

You didn’t know her. You hadn’t even spoken to her over the course of the festival. And what she was to Lucien — what the two of them got up to — was absolutely none of your business.

So it didn’t exactly make sense to you, why your curiosity piqued. Why you found yourself strolling over to her.

She looked up immediately, a polite, reserved smile on her lips, and stepped away from the keg. Made room for you.

“Hi.” You said — and immediately felt foolish. “I’m Y/N.”

“I know.” The girl smiled. She was truly radiant, her hair like a golden halo around her head, a complexion that reminded you of strawberries and cream. “I mean—you’re Dion’s fiancée. I’ve seen you around. I’m Tansy.”

“Nice to meet you, Tansy.” You pulled your now-full chalice away from the keg, taking a great gulp. “Are you here with someone?”

A husband, maybe? Or someone you had a quick fumble in the forest with? How old even are you?

Gods. You needed to get a grip of yourself. Your curiosity was…bizarre. Entirely misplaced and inappropriate. You didn’t know Lucien Vanserra. What he got up to was of no concern to you.

You were just…looking for leverage. To use against him, should you need it.

Yes. That was totally it.

Tansy smiled, taking a far more delicate sip of her wine. “My family are around here somewhere.”

“Do you know the Vanserras well?” You asked. Am I going to be seeing more of you around here?

“Quite well. My father has worked for the High Lord for many years, overseeing and appointing the members of his official guard. It’s mostly Lucien I know, though — because we’re of similar age.”

Right. An important position in Beron’s court that required someone he trusted, had faith in. And probably meant that the two families were relatively close, also. You wondered if that night you’d seen Tansy and Lucien together had been a first, or a recurring situation—

“Will I get to see you around much?” You found yourself blurting; could have kicked yourself for it. “Perhaps we can be—friends.”

Tansy blinked — clearly hadn’t been expecting you to say that, of all things. “I’m not here too often. Our estate is around an hour away. But we visit sometimes, for holidays and such…”

“Well.” You smiled. “Perhaps when you do visit, we can get to know each other better.” If you’re not too busy with Lucien.

Tansy smiled back at you. “I’d like that.”

As you wished her an enjoyable night and strode away, you couldn’t help feeling a lick of…shame. That the entire conversation had been somewhat disingenuous…that you’d really been angling for information you didn’t have any right to. You weren’t a mean, petty person who wielded saccharine smiles to get whatever you wanted. Tansy hadn’t done anything to deserve a minor interrogation from you.

What did it matter, after all, how well she knew Lucien Vanserra? Or whether they’d fucked once or one hundred times?

Why did it prick at you uncomfortably that Tansy knew the elusive Lucien Vanserra, when you’d got nothing from him but sharp words wrapped up in mocking tones and cutting smiles?

Because he was a mystery — that was why. Because you knew nothing of him, found him puzzling. No doubt, if you were to get to know him somehow, to glean some of his personality behind the unpleasantries he’d thrown your way so far, your curiosity would fizzle out.

Probably.

“Care for a dance?”

A warm hand enclosed around your own, and you were tugged round to find Eris Vanserra towering over you. His hair — shorter than that of his brothers — seemed to burn brighter in the glow of the firelight. Those wicked, amber eyes of his were always alert, always gleaming. Always looking like he was forever one step ahead, privy to information that others weren’t.

You glanced over at Dion unsurely, finding him still leaning down and engrossed in conversation with Willow. You supposed it wouldn’t hurt to get to know your future brother-in-law a bit more. And with Dion making an effort with your sister…

“I‘ll dance with you.” You agreed, taking Eris’s arm. “Lead the way.”

He did — escorting you over to the sea of moving bodies, a plethora of people who had been taught the art of dancing from the moment they could stand on their own two feet. You all moved as expertly as one another — all would have received the same training, the intense priming for these very events. You dipped into the knowledge you had tucked away, reminding yourself of the gruelling dance lessons you’d endured alongside your sisters. Allowed Eris to pull you around with just as much precision and grace.

It was halfway through the second dance, neither of you showing any signs of stopping, that he grinned wickedly down at you and said, “She expects to be his bride one day.”

You frowned — twirled in his arms — directed that frown up at him. “Pardon me?”

“Tansy.” He tilted his head. “I saw you speaking with her. She expects to one day be Lucien’s bride.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

He spun you around again. Smirked. “Why do you think I’m telling you this?”

“…because you’re a busybody gossip?”

He snorted. “Fair. But what else am I to do, whilst waiting to become High Lord, besides observe and gossip?” He leaned down, his breath brushing the shell of your ear. His scent was much like his brothers’ — earthy and gritty. Pleasantly raw. “It’s surprising what you see when you truly peel your eyes and observe. Quite an enthralling habit — I’d really recommend it.”

“I’m sure.” Your voice was dry, something — some tiny thing — twisting inside of you. “But I still don’t understand why you’re telling me about Tansy. Why should I care what Lucien does or doesn’t do?”

The lively rush of the current song came to a close, making way for a chorus of cheers and applause from the audience that stood nearby. The other dancers around you slowed — as did you and Eris. He twirled you around once more, setting you on your feet. His eyes stared down into yours.

“Why, indeed.” He murmured with a calculated smirk, and lifted your hand to press a kiss to the backs of your fingers. “Thank you for the dances, love.”

Just like that, he was striding away from you, his mere, dominating presence commanding eyes to lock on him in whichever direction he went.

You, too, stared. Scowled.

You needed more wine.

⤲

“I’m going to stay with Mama and Papa for a while.”

The next morning, Willow clutched your hands in her own. You’d already said your terse goodbyes to the rest of your family and watched them climb into their carriages — your parents shooting you warning glances while they disappeared into theirs.

“I think that’s for the best.” Beside you, Dion inclined his chin. He reached out, gently clasping Willow’s arm. “You’re always welcome here.”

“Thank you—for your kindness.” She dipped her head. “Both of you.”

But it was Dion’s kindness, you knew, that had put the light there, that now shone in her eyes. Whatever he’d said to her over the last couple of days…whatever it was about his warm company…it had been a tonic for Willow. One that gave her the bravery she needed to climb into the carriage.

“Write to me as soon as you get home.” You said, not letting go of her hand. “And come visit again soon. Please.”

“I will. I promise.” Willow smiled softly. She squeezed your hand, kissed it quickly, then pulled away. Her eyes slid to Dion’s. Lingered there. “Goodbye, then.”

Dion smiled at her gently, placing a hand at the small of your back. “We’ll see you soon.”

Such promise laced in those words…you knew he meant them. And that was another reason for you to be grateful. He would travel to your family’s territory and collect Willow, himself, if it helped you to feel better about being here.

It was a comfort. A small one.

The carriages lurched into motion — and so did your heart, painfully squeezing inside of your chest as you watched them, one after the other, being pulled along by your family’s horses.

It felt…strange — to not be going with them. To be left behind. And as they began to descend the long, winding path out of the estate, and Willow leaned out of the window to wave at you once more, you were surprised to find a tear rolling down your cheek.

It was like…watching that one, final piece of your old life wither away. Watching any remaining scraps of freedom dying with it.

Clearly misreading your emotion, Dion squeezed your hand. “She’ll be alright. I’m sure of it.”

You weren’t in the mood to explain that your emotions were made up of more selfish reasons — that panic was bleating inside of you that there was no longer any escapism, no avoiding the inevitable. No game stalls or bonfires or bottles of cider and honey-roasted plums.

You had a duty laying on your shoulders. And today was the first day of honouring it.

“It’s cold.” Dion murmured softly. “Shall we go inside?”

You nodded. There was no point lingering on the front steps of the manor — not now your family’s carriages had disappeared into the trees, and only the distant echoes of the horses’ hooves against the path remained.

So you followed Dion on up the steps, feeling as though you were forcing your feet to move forward as the two of you made your way inside, the warmth of the manor enveloping you.

“I’ll make you some tea.” He pulled on your hand so, so gently. “I think there are some little cakes, too, freshly baked this morning.”

“That would be lovely. Thank you.” You knew your answering smile was watery, unconvincing, but you tried, all the same — tried to make as much of an effort as Dion himself was.

The two of you were just heading to the tea room, strolling along in a heavy silence, when Barric appeared seemingly out of nowhere. He nodded a polite greeting to you, before focusing his attention solely on Dion.

“The High Lord wishes to speak with you.” He said.

Dion hesitated, not letting go of your hand. “Can’t it wait?”

“I’m afraid not.” Barric shook his head, shooting you another glance as he merely explained, “Official business.”

“It’s fine.” You let go of Dion’s hand. Took a step back. It was probably best for you to be alone, right now, anyway. “You go.”

Releasing a soft sigh, Dion nodded. He leaned down, pressing a quick kiss to your temple. “I’ll come and find you when I’m finished. Make sure you eat something.”

You didn’t feel like eating anything, but you didn’t imagine voicing that would do you any favours. He’d already fussed that you’d declined all food offered to you so far that day.

So you nodded, wrapping your arms around yourself and watching as Dion followed Barric through a doorway, the door shutting firmly behind them.

And then it was just you. And your feelings.

⤲

You were churned up beyond words. Restless. Every passing second seemed to rub it right in your face — the dawning realisation that the life you once knew was over.

That this — all of this; the manor, the gowns, the posturing — this was all you had now. All you were now.

You tried to wait for Dion like you were expected to. Tried to sit quietly and read. But none of the words were going in, and you found yourself rereading the same sentences over and over. Found the tea you were drinking tasted sour and unpleasant in your mouth. You couldn’t stop fidgeting, needing to move—

You needed an outlet. Something to help you work through your emotions, your frustration. In your old life, you would have sought out Linden by now and sparred until you were sweating and aching, but clearer in your mind.

You wouldn’t ordinarily allow yourself to get to this level of restlessness, where you felt like screaming and throwing something across the room.

You launched yourself out of your seat, heading through the glass doors to the garden. It wasn’t a pleasant day to be outside — cold and overcast, no hint of sunlight to warm you, and the very light dress you were wearing certainly didn’t help. You wrapped your arms around yourself as you began a brisk walk around the green, happy to put distance between yourself and the gods-damn manor.

You didn’t want to go into the woods. Didn’t want to risk stumbling across Lucien Vanserra lounging against a tree with his hair flowing beautifully about him. In a mood like this one, you didn’t trust yourself not to truly let rip and say something you’d later regret.

So you headed to the far gathering of outbuildings that Dion had vaguely gestured to when he’d shown you around the estate — ones he’d said would be of keen interest to you — if Beron ever allowed you to explore them.

And curious at heart, it was only a matter of time before you were bound to find yourself out here. You’d already spied — once, through a brief glimpse — what was inside that middle building. The Vanserra armoury.

It was the most brilliant armoury you’d ever seen. Covered wall-to-wall in centuries’ worth of collected weapons. Every sword and knife and dagger you could possibly think of was hung up in there, polished and ready for use. Some weapons you didn’t even know the names of. A whole arsenal of beautiful, expertly-crafted work. You hadn’t found an appropriate moment to yourself to venture in there unseen. Until now.

You inched the door open, slipping inside. The sight was as breathtaking as the first time you’d seen it. You knew Linden would love it.

The roaring in your head became a quiet, dull monotone as you slowly traipsed the room, studying each and every piece on show. You reached out to some, brushing your fingers over the hilts, wondering what kind of combat their blades had engaged in, how many times they’d struck true. Your eyes snagged on a wooden training sword laid out on a table, and a smile tugged at your lips, memories of your early days of training pelting you—

“You shouldn’t be in here.”

You jumped, swivelling to find Lucien leaning against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his chest, the broad muscles poking through his white shirt. He appraised you, raising an eyebrow.

You levelled a blank gaze on him, the ire inside you twinging. “Why not.”

“Because,” He stepped inside, “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but there are a lot of sharp, pointy things in here, and you might hurt yourself.”

You snorted. “Oh really?”

“Really. This is an armoury, not a festival game. One slice with one of these swords, and your insides will be outside.”

You stared at him, your nails biting into your palms. It would be so, so easy to rip into him — to unleash two weeks worth of frustration, and suffocation, on him. You were certainly in the mood to, and he would certainly deserve it, with his general behaviour towards you.

But the satisfaction of a verbal lashing would be short-lived. Not to mention, you didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing that he’d got on your nerves.

So you turned away from him. And what possessed you to pick up the sword from the table, to weigh it in your hand and feel the pleasant bite of its heaviness, you didn’t know.

But that same spark of something had you turning on Lucien. Had you setting your jaw and saying, “Show me.”

Immediately, he snorted. “What?”

“Come on.” You shrugged. “If I’m such a silly, clueless little girl, grab one of those training swords and spar with me. Show me everything I don’t know.”

Those stunning, russet eyes flicked over you, calculating and yet unsure. As though he couldn’t quite decide whether or not you were serious. You gestured with the sword to push your point — the feel of it familiar, like an old friend.

“…I’m not sparring with you.” He stepped away, his eyebrows raised. “Put that down.”

You tilted your head, flicking your wrist and twirling the wooden sword easily in your hand — a fun, showy trick Linden had shown you. “Why not? I know you don’t like me, but I trust you not to actually hurt me.”

His eyes narrowed on that little trick. “Y/N—”

“Come on.” You brushed past him. Didn’t give him room to argue. “Grab one of those swords. Humour me. I even promise to stay out of your way afterwards.”

There was the tiniest pause — and then Lucien was cursing under his breath. You smirked to yourself, knowing damn well you’d worn him down, even as you kept your back to him and stepped out into the chill air.

Seconds later, Lucien was emerging, also clutching the hilt of a wooden sword. You willed your eyes not to snag on the brilliant flash of his hair. The intense, beautiful expression on his face.

He looked like a piece of art.

He approached you, studying the readying stance that you were already perfecting. His brows pinched. “You’re going to get in trouble for this if anyone sees.”

You shrugged. Didn’t care. Maybe it would work in your favour, and Beron would see…call off the engagement and send you straight home. Maybe you were already past the point of caring about what that meant.

“Do I look like I care?” You planted your feet. Linden would have cursed you for not stretching first, but — no time. “Come on. Show me what a clueless female I am.”

“I never said—”

You struck. Lucien was only just fast enough to block the move. He blinked at you.

You smirked. Watched as he quickly righted his stance. The two of you eyed each other.

And thus began the swift dance that Linden had walked you through time and time again until you’d had it perfected. The sword was heavy, and you were a little rusty — just a bit — but it was muscle memory that led you through the strikes and manoeuvres, the feinting and parrying.

It wasn’t long before the two of you were sweaty and huffing breaths, but still you didn’t falter, even as your arm ached from the strain. You blocked a strike from Lucien, dancing around him on nimble feet. He spun around to face you.

“Got some frustrations you need to work through, Lady?” He breathed, following your every move with his own.

“Perhaps I do.” You parried. “What of it?”

“Maybe I’m surprised. You’re not a bad sword wielder.”

“A compliment?” You huffed a laugh as you moved. “I’m touched. You’re not so bad yourself. I must admit, I had you pegged as a poet and a dancer, not a warrior. Very fluid.”

“One could consider,” He panted, sweat glistening on his brow, “That sword fighting is a dance in itself, no? If your movements are not fluid, you’ll be neither a good dancer, nor a good fighter.”

“Talking from personal experience?”

“I’ve been known to take a dance lesson or two.”

And Mother above, you didn’t doubt it. If Linden was brute force and as slick as the weapons he wielded, Lucien was…art. Pure, unflinching art. The grace with which he moved would have distracted you once, had you not honed your concentration with such precision. But strands of red hair stuck to his sweat-slick face, his cheeks bitten pink and his muscles rippling.

Part of you didn’t want it to end — just so you could watch his masterful dance go on and on and on. His autumn scent surrounded you, wanted to overpower you — but you blocked it out. Forced yourself to move.

“So tell me,” He watched you closely, breaths huffing, “What, exactly, is it that’s got you so worked up? Tired of my brother pampering you already?”

“Maybe.” You snorted. “Or maybe I’m just wound a bit tight after two weeks of posturing. Not exactly easy to find release with so many people constantly around, you know?”

Lucien stumbled — just slightly. You suppressed the impulse to smirk as he righted himself, parrying another strike.

“I’m not sure I know what you mean.” He ground out as you circled each other.

“Oh, I think you do.” You grinned wickedly. “All those guests, not a moment to myself. No one likes to be caught with their hand between their legs.”

And that was all it took.

Lucien faltered, his feet unsteady as his lips parted. His shock was distracting enough that you were able to land your final blow. You kicked a leg out, using that very distraction to sweep Lucien’s feet out from under him. The great, muscled male, so much taller than you, tumbled straight to the ground.

With a soft whoosh of air, he rolled onto his back. You stood over him, planting a foot either side of him, and the two of you stared at each other.

And then it was just…silent. You and him and your huffing breaths. Lucien seemed slightly stunned; was still blinking at you, his eyes slowly, slowly, trailing down. He didn’t even try to mask the direction of his gaze.

“Do you yield?” You asked, prodding his chest with the tip of the wooden sword.

His eyes snapped back to yours quickly. They were still wide…still stunned. “Yeah. Sure. Whatever.”

You snorted, stepping back. Offered him your hand. It took a few seconds before he actually accepted it, and you helped him to his feet. You picked up his sword, handing it back to him.

“Thank you for that.” You clapped him on his shoulder, brushing past him. “It was just what I needed.”

He could only stand and stare as you returned the sword to the armoury. He hovered in the doorway, studying you. Like he wanted to say something.

What…you weren’t sure. But you didn’t give him the chance.

You passed him once more, a smirk toying on your lips. You knew for a fact that his eyes trailed your back as you strolled away, brushing your sweat-drenched hair from your face.

“I’m off to take a bath,” You called over your shoulder. “Enjoy the rest of your day.”

You knew precisely what image you’d left him with. And as it eased the ache that had been ravaging you, you couldn’t bring yourself to care — not one bit. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

all acotar tags: @moonfawnx @writingsbychlo @moonlitcelestial @orangecreamsicle54 @saturnspoet0711 @andahugaroundtheneck @nightscourtt @mysticalcheesecakemiracle @luckypersonmentality @nobody00sthings @kristalhi @tencrushesperday @janzquu @we-were-beautiful @thewarriormoon @cirwin2013 @mrs-azriel @the-kwami-of-fandom-frustration @libraryofathousandstars @daily-dose-of-sass @pixiestix13 @basicbittywitty @simplefan-638 @highlady-ofillyria @false-desire-182 @fictionalcharacterlereasigim @theofficialmadman @kemillfreitas @sledgehammer21-1 @shannonsaid @jtargs @morelovemorepeacemoretattoo-blog @new-adventures-everyday @positivewitch @crushedcloudsx @cartoonnerdgirl @a-frog-with-a-laptop @ssmay123 @linduzmunna @ruler-of-hades @kennedy-brooke @peachyandmoon @ariaaira @topaz125 @blitz-fall @azrielsbbg @gracedarr @goldentournesol @localhopedealerr @swagfreakathletemonger @sfhsgrad-blog @lo0oserlex @ruleroftides @mayabennet03 @vera0124 @mich0731 @balam-sen @luciensbxtch @holywolfsstuff @chloesgoneposts @margssstuff

#acotar #lucien x reader #lucien vanserra x reader #lucien vanserra #lucien acotar #lucien fanfic #acotar fandom #acotar writing #a court of thorns and roses #acotar fanfic #acotar headcanon #acotar fluff #acotar series #acotar smut #acotar x reader #fluff #mating bond #lucien #lucien smut #lucien fluff #lucien fic #angst #smut #sarah j maas #vanserra x reader #eris vanserra #autumn court #acotar universe #reader insert #acotar books

[iamafanofcartoons]

Rabbit Debunks Hbomberguy’s “RWBY is Disappointing Video” and explains why the Critics are wrong about RWBY.  Part 1 of 2

Making a thread reacting to the hbomberguy RWBY is Disappointing video.

Mostly as a refresher and also because there’s been a lot of dissension regarding it so why not.

Intro Calls it R (Rue) By lmaoo.

You’re not supposed to pronounce the W So the gist of it, is that he feels like it has great concept that could be interesting, but fails to execute it in any meaningful way???

Like overall it’s bad but there’s few good glimpses-

Of what could be a great show.

I guess for now I guess I can give it the benefit of the doubt and assume good intentions so far.

No words on the History of Monty Oum and RT history.

I mean it pretty much all checks out

Though immediately admitting your bias against the show takes the validity of some of your criticisms away ngl.

So he loves the Red Trailer but brings up the views it gained and then brings up the views of the episodes (Vol 1 ep 1 and 2) as a sort of gotcha like “oh see the trailer is more popular than the episode like look at the 15M to (episode 2) 6.8M ratio!!!”

Like those are two-  Wildly different things my guy

But what’s up with that “Red Like Roses Part 1 is the best composed music Jess has ever done” take?????

That’s wild asF fr.

Like no way you listened to the soundtracks of V1-3 and still have that opinion.

Like it’s amazing but????

“Does she get the scar from the fight or from something else, oooo mysterious”.

Is this a bit????

She so obviously gets the scar from the fight so I hope it’s just a bit lmao.

Also the complaint about Adam is so weird?

“He’s so obviously a bad guy that it doesn’t make sense”

“Since there’s already wolves set up as the baddies in the series”

Like, it’s not word for word what he said but that’s the gist of it?

It’s a bad and very nitpicky complaint since there are many series with more than 1 antagonist and antagonistic force.

I don’t know.

Saying “it’s coming from a well meaning place” but then saying it’s extremely bad, followed up by an intro song saying that RWBY is lame and it sucks all while dedicating it to Monty is…. So disgusting??? And very disingenuous???

Using the ending of Vol 2 as a point in your “they don’t know their story” when Ruby is laying down all the things that they have yet to solve (leading into the new volume and this laying down the groundwork for it)

It’s obviously in your face my dude.

Ah damn, a little out of order, but is there instances where Miles or Kerry  acknowledges good faith criticism? Panels? Deleted tweets? Anything?

Mainly just curious if it’s true that they haven’t and he just didn’t do the research by saying he “has a hard time finding any”

Another thing. Forgot to mention.

Really wish he prefaced his complaints about the voice acting and writing that he understood that the studio itself was amateurish and small with not a lot of budget to work with. (Unless that’s true) not that there isn’t criticism but that- There are TANGIBLE reasons why it’s the way that it is.

Where Do We Even Start?

Uhhh they never dropped the Dust Theft plot line????

Volume 2 was literally the culmination of the dust theft and the reason is because of Cinder’s plans.

Another thing that’s in your face but just, weirdly you gloss over???

“The intro doesn’t set up the story properly… leaves out the fragile peace between the nations…. Leaves out faunus… leaves out semblances…”

Quite literally, the intro talks about things that weren’t even revealed until Vol 4 to 9. The intro is good and sets up what it NEEDS-

Like sure you can say “oh but it’s only added till later when they got the story that they wanted to tell straight”

Mate, a pro tip for a lot of writers renowned/acclaimed have admitted that some of their works or some of their best writing decisions were made by the seat- Of their pants.

You think Naruto, one of the most iconic and popular anime of all time would have spun into how it is just off the intro of the first episode?

What about Bleach?

ATLA?

One Piece???

There are so many instances where the intro just isn’t all encompassing bc- That just isn’t how story writing goes.

You can have the best most rigid outline in the whole world, but at times you’re gonna go off script because there’s something you want to expand upon more or explore.

Ends off this segment by saying that RWBY’s story is interesting and it has neat ideas (backahandedly by adding “to write a wiki about”) but the storytelling only gets worse.

Which, I sort of disagree with???

It’s not stellar by any means, but I chalk that up with them- Not having the sort of resources available.

However from what they managed TO put together it was coherent enough to convey what they were meaning to portray.

Though I do have my gripes with certain aspects of the first two volumes.

But from V3 on? It’s only gotten- Stronger.

Yes I harp on V5 a LOT and it’s still one of the weaker volumes, but the conversations and character dynamics where stronger than they’ve been.

It was mainly the animation in the last few episodes of the giant fight that I just, wasn’t vibing with at all.

Worldbuilding and Conveyance

So next he talks about how aura was explained.

Bringing up both Harry Potter and ATLA and how they tell it as an example.

Following it up by making a rwby edit to make it seem as if it was mundane and boring.

Which isnt the case at all.

If you- Actually take the time to watch the scene.

It's about 1:20 long and while the explanation of what Aura does is being told to the viewer, it shows Ren taking down the King Taijitu with his aura.

It's another valid form of story telling because it's not just two characters talking on screen.

it's also giving us an insight of how it would be put into action.

"No one just happens to have full on speeches prepared in case anyone is to ask"

Uhhh, have you met Weiss?

Even the examples you gave literally is Hermione and Katara.

"Why does Jaune not know about this?

When he came from a long line of hero's and monster Hunters."

Idk, how does Naruto not know about Chakra despite 8 years as a academy student.

He probably just skipped out on it or didn't take it seriously enough.

He never went to- A prep school like Signal either.

His transcripts were faked, so you could easily say he went to Beacon with nothing more than a Dime, A old Rickety sword and a dream lol.

Also Pyrrha is super smart and also a really great battle tactician.

Of course she would be able to- recite what Aura does word for word.

It's not mischaracterization.

You just want to twist that narrative against her.

And not just that, I feel a strong mischaracterization of Jaune.

If Jaune is played off as an idiot for jokes, that's cool. But if he's shown to just not- Understand or doesn't know about the world at large, then that could hint at the fact that Jaune is more than just an idiot.

He's probably born in the sticks/boonies.

A country bumpkin if you will where Hunters aren't all that well known nor pop culture.

It doesn't dumb down the other characters.

Because Weiss is frustrated herself that someone so famous isn't recognizable by anyone and everyone in the world.

Same thing with her and the SDC

For Christ sakes, he only knew Pyrrha from a cereal box be fr

Well he brings up the Jaundice thing and yeah that's fair, a lot of people have gripes with that (i'm not one of them) and brings up how Pyrrha is only really a character for Jaune's development as a fighter and romance option but not much else on her own.

Which... Yeah I kinda- get that too.

Like, I liked Pyrrha too, but I do wish she had more to do in V1 and 2.

But in V3 is where she shines.

Hell there were so many people who did cry and got shocked by the end of Vol 3 even with the amount of screentime she gets.

"Praise RWBY for being feminist and progessive cause most of the mcs are women... But Jaune has 4 episodes dedicated to him, and has the coolest girl in school flirting and helping him become a stronger warrior."

Jaune isn't the main character.

How I've always viewed RWBY and JNPR has always been: RWBY as the protagonist and JNPR as the deuteragonist.

They hold about the same amount of importance because of how close their teams are.

So of course you're going to want to give the deuteragonist development and screentime to.

And yes Jaune had Jaundice.

RWBY still has an ABSURD amount of episodes dedicated to them as well so the balance/ration will always be in RWBY's favor regardless of how you feel about Jaune as a character and Jaune's importance to the story.

Same goes for the rest of NPR

"The writer's dont know what Yang's semblance is.

It goes from her being angry, to it being her taking hits and she transfers that energy back to them by hitting them again, and then temper tantrums, and then re-xeplain it as a redirection of energy stored from hits."-

Uhh, no.

Her semblance has always been about redirection of stored energy from attacks and aiming them back at the opponent.

Every single time we see her use it, it's always after she's taken several hits.

It's probably still possible to use it without taking hits, but its more than- likely less powerful.

He goes on to talk about how semblances are abstract and only gets mentioned 14 episodes later.

Which sure ok, but the gist of them and how they work are still easily within the story.

Could they have expanded upon it more earlier on? Yeah they could.

But to sit there and say, "When Pyrrha used her abilities and Ruby and Weiss look at her like she was weird and surprised and confused she has powers too"

no no no no no, that is grossly misreading the scene.

Pyrrha has kept her semblance a secret from anyone and everyone.

No one knows what it is or if she even had one.

They were just confused by what she did, why her hand glowed black, and why her hand was out.

It had nothing to do with them being confused about why someone else had a semblance, but more so they never knew what Pyrrha's was.

and also, the reading of Semblance = magic is both meh and eh.

Like if you looked at any and every single semblance that exists in RWBY, every single one of them have to do with concepts that has nothing to do with earth, wind, fire, and water.

Whereas Magic in the series- has Maidens throwing storms, lightning bolts, fire, ice, etc. at any enemy they choose.

That's the major difference between magic and semblance.

Magic is divine, naturalistic. Semblances are more man made if that makes sense.

Man he really does not like how semblances are portrayed/exposited.

Like it's been just as long as he harped on for Pyrrha expositing the aura scene.

like the exaggeration that he's going to, to explain this is kinda crazy

It's not a semi complicated concept at all, like he said it was.

It's very easy to follow and very easy to understand. he brings up Emerald and Cinder knowing about it, but doesn't bring up the fact that Pyrrha had to have put it in her application for Beacon or her personal- record that only Beacon has track of.

A record that they broke into with the helps of Watts, but not just that.

But Mercury also figured it out because he's an intelligent fighter just like Pyrrha is.

You can just say that Pyrrha's opponents were all just dumb for not figuring it out.

But no, it's just bad writing I guess.

Brings up WoR as an example of not being able to tell the story completely and labels it as homework.

It's not necessarily out of the norm though.

There are lots of character guides, extra material that expands on characters, worlds-

nd ideas that you can't really put the time in the show to do.

Like let's look at the first 3 volumes and how most episodes where 12-15 minutes long.

And even then they were still trying to get the hang of writing for something so massive as RWBY.

Having extra material so readers can get a better understanding of the world around them isn't bad. because even then, most everyone knows who Faunus are.

How Aura works, what a semblance is. all of these on a surface level.

If you want to dig deep, thats what WoR is for.

Unless you just wanna insult the show and embrace ignorance?

Some Positive Examples

Such a nothing complaint really. 

Just Miles and Kerry's writing vs Monty's character acting (in terms of how he conveys the four in a team fight (example being Team RWBY vs Mecha Roman)). 

I mean, I dont know what to really say here.

"The writers are so busy writing drama and wacky skits to explain why they're friends while Monty is putting in the REAL work with the fight scenes and showing how close they are and how far ruby has come at becoming a leader."  

Yeah... Cause that's what writers and animators do

Briefly touches on Ships and how Monty, Kerry, and Miles referenced them in the fight. (also decided to call it creepy since Ruby is 15 and the other girls are 17...

Which isn't that bad??

Like Sophomore and Senior in High School really).

Wasn't Ichigo Kurosaki 15 and Naruto not even 13?

Also says they didn't make a name- for Ruby and Yang because of the certain fans that ship those two together so they avoided that one altogether

.... Which yeah??? Did you want them too lol??

I can't seem to see his point of bringing this up because on one hand it feels like he's admonishing them for it, but  on the other hand he seems... like he's a little upset that they dont have a team attack name?

Maybe just at the inconsistency of it. Which i can understand.

I would have maybe came up with one that isn't fandom made so they can have a cool SISTERS team attack, like Rose Dragon!

Ends off this segment talking about more Miles and Kerry vs Monty (with Shawn being added in).

Another example of writing vs character expositing through animation by using the Pyrrha vs Mercury fight as well as the exposition between Emerald, Cinder, and Mercury.

Lots of talk about animation being weird and how he's seen worse animation but the stories were good enough to overlook it.

I'd be a broken record by stating this again and again.

But just look at what they had to work with. Look at how divided the writing and the animation- really were with Monty coming up with new characters that the team had to shove in last minute.

Look at Poser even and how the engine was something really only Monty and Shane (oops I made a mistake in that other post) could work to the level that they did.

Look at RT and even CRWBY at the time.

And now look where they are now.

You can't tell me that they've gone downhill when most of your gripes that you've complained about are/have been fixed in the later seasons.

Gonna end it here and make it a 2 parter. This thread is-

Long enough and I'm tired extremely lol.

I'll do a QRT tomorrow and start it back up. 

If anyone has more to add or correct me on, feel free to QRT anything you feel i didnt do a good job of explaining or just missed in general.

Any help is appreciated.

https://twitter.com/PhonyMangaka/status/1653898140678856704

#rwby #rwby analysis #rwby is enjoyable #rwby is a good show #rwby is good #just give rwby a chance #all we're saying is give rwby a chance #give rwby a chance #phonymangaka

[obstinaterixatrix]

also went on a paddle boat with sister, it was fun I haven’t done it in like 7 years. we stopped by a book store, and

1) there’s a physical copy of A Hero in the Demon King’s Castle which was surprising to me because syohei(/inutoki)’s got really off-beat style so I’ve figured they’d be too niche to be licensed, plus it had a dust jacket WITH author/artist bio AND the extra comics on the actual cover… I didn’t get it because I’m not quite ride or die for it, but I am reconsidering because syohei’s art is just really fun. plus it’s just a well-printed book, how often do you see manga printed in eng with dust jackets? I’ll probably reread it and see if I Really Do Want It. if anyone wants a bit of a wacky read with interesting art, give it a look. I actually… really like inutoki & syohei’s other anthology more because I really like the love interest of the main oneshot but it also has one oneshot that’s pretty vicious to the point I’m not sure I’d actually get a physical copy lol

2) speaking of pretty vicious, a physical copy of one of asada nemui’s works was there which I think is pretty cool, her art is sooo interesting to look at. it’s not as crazy as syohei’s, but it just feels… direct? impactful? just an appealing style. I wouldn’t buy a physical copy of that one, but I’d get one of sleeping dead… I’d consider getting the anthology but she really paired two of my favorite oneshots while having the main story have My Hardline Exclusion Criteria 😞 I’d get the other anthology tho, no hard no’s in that one. where was I going with this? well, if you like strange morose rancid toxic romances, definitely look up asada nemui and also a list of content warnings

3) on that note, it made sense to list manga alphabetically by title back when it’d take up a single shelf max, but I think book stores really need to rethink manga shelving, especially since more bl with smut/het with smut/yuri with smut is getting licensed and distributed

3a) by the way there were quite a few yuri titles, which is a cool change! I already had the one I liked

3b) buy ‘5 seconds before a witch falls in love’ it’s so good. I LOVE the main story. I am lukewarm on the other oneshot. the main story is SOOOO fun, zeniko sumiya has kind of a more shounen-esque art style and she usually draws bl so you need to treasure her fun & dumb witch/witch hunter shenanigans

3c) I mistyped shenanigans as shenanigals lmao that kinda fits still

3a) and the other ~15 I’ve read and dropped because I wasn’t interested in them (I showed sister the cover of SHWD—like, I also want muscular women but I cannot get over some of the anatomy, those are beach balls attached to her chest? like it’s not the aesthetic of Anime Titty Jiggle Physics but I really cannot get over it) but I’m glad there’s more yuri. mostly. I hate that the gamer one is there, the art and writing is so weirdly uncomfortably… H for something that is a SFW slice of life, and I didn’t like a few of the other series that sister pointed out because they were really. too long with not enough sense of direction/momentum to have satisfying character/relationship progression. BUT IT’S GOOD THAT MORE YURI IS BEING LICENSED.

3) anyway I was thinking that there should probably be more a delineation between either genres or age of audience, but at the same time, that’s tricky—having an 18+ section could make it uncomfortable for folks who enjoy being able to browse without a glaring neon sign that indicates they’re looking at smut, dividing by genre can make it tough for folks who want to take a look at gay romances/lgbtq autobio more surreptitiously,

3d) well, I would imagine it’s less of a huge deal now than it was ~15 years ago, but homophobia still is a thing

3) so in the end I have no defined conclusion to my thoughts on manga shelving in english-speaking countries

4) I saw several copies of nagisa furuya’s works! I might go back for number call, that was the first one of hers I’ve read and it’s really cute. I was telling sister, this might sound bad but I like how… standard her art & writing is, it’s very clean and pleasant, her low(ish)-stakes slice of life fluff is really good. also nice to have sfw options for introducing folks to bl

5) this is completely unrelated to this bookstore trip but a couple of weeks ago I saw an m/f romance and was like. do I know this artist from bl??? but I looked up the artist and didn’t see anything I would recognize, it’s just… the way older men is drawn is so…

5) like I know I’m stupid biased because I read an inadvisable amount of bl but he looks like a guy straight out of my miserable office worker bls. I feel like I should know him from bl. I guess I just forget that m/f fans also like older men because all the josei romances I’m involuntarily exposed to are very (…) Like That

5a) mangaplanet REALLY needs to reorganize its genre divisions. hardcore josei smut shouldn’t be lumped with shoujo. hentai should not be lumped with shounen. guys what is going on there

5) but I’ve been thinking of reading it because even by style alone it looks like it’ll at least be unique m/f (though, if I’m gonna read m/f, my preference would be for a miserable older office lady and kinda punk-ish younger guy, but oh well…) it’s just, the cognitive dissonance of squinting at this guy and being like. you belong in a bl.

6) I need to get back out of the habit of reading bls to pass out at 2am 😔 for a while I finally dragged myself back to sleeping at 1am with my baby leash (screen lock) but I’m back in my bad habits. I could at least look at the unhinged horror m/f racher’s been begging me to read just to diversify what I’m pouring into my brain. oh, also sister gave me night is short walk on girl to read and the writer really did deserve all his awards, his character voice is extremely arresting

#my ramblings

[stergeon]

🦈❤️ (for that writer ask post)

🦈 Which character is the toughest to write?

i’m lucky in that most characters flow pretty easily for me, but i’ve struggled the most with writing ferdinand and bernadetta.

ferdinand’s voice is more challenging to execute than i ever anticipate it will be. i barely featured him in chapter 1 of muscle memory, but it was enough to stress me out. he has this particular tone i can’t seem to nail—he’s overly confident and sunny in a way that can come off as oafish, but that oafishness is usually hiding a clever and thoughtful truth.

in general, i like bernie, but she’s not my favorite lmao. pre-timeskip, i find her to be so tough to write as she spirals for nothing and can easily take control of a scene. it’s hard to keep her on task, and i worry about her coming off cringey. i’ve only made an attempt at writing her in echoes of zanado and i’m not sure i’ll do it again, though i’ll definitely give post-timeskip bernie a chance to shine at some point. gotta reward her for all that growth.

i’ve also taken a few stabs at writing locked tomb fics, but i simply cannot get harrowhark’s voice quite right, so those have yet to see the light of day. alas. maybe i’ll finish one eventually!

❤️ What is your favorite line that you’ve written in a fic?

hmmmmm. i don’t feel like i’m particularly skilled at crafting one-liners that stand out or are all that witty. i tend to either be partial to parts of sentences or entire passages that flow well. for whatever reason, i was pleased with the line in muscle memory chapter 2 about kissing the “soft plateau below her navel” even though it’s just describing a tummy lol. the words feel nice together.

i’m gonna cheat and throw a few out here. edelgard’s rant about the cats’ names in her majesty’s favored felines was so fun to write and still cracks me up. she’s so high-drama smdh. love her. there’s also a really stupid sex joke early in that story that’s not even a joke, per se, but also makes me laugh.

i think like you mean it contains some of my most primo navel-gazing angst, and i’m especially fond of the very last paragraph:

She held her like she was the other end of the tether, like she was the only thing keeping her here, like holding her could save her, could give her purpose, could make her worthy, like the heat-on-heat of their intertwined bodies could make meaning of all the things that didn’t make sense in this world. She closed her eyes, and held her, and begged the favor of an absent god, praying that she—that this—could be enough.

i also like this line from chapter eight of at the edge of the void:

And even without her love, he would still choose to make himself a planet and remain in her orbit, knowing full well he would be eventually swallowed by the gravity of a dying sun.

unfortunately, my neuroticism doesn’t let me like it that much because i’ve not put enough thought into whether anyone in fódlan, especially edelgard, has a concept of what gravity is or that suns (plural) can die. i won’t let me have any fun.

#fe3h #fire emblem #sterge.eml #wakingupclean #thank you for the ask!!! #i really posted that ask game and then proceeded to get stoned and sleep for like thirteen hours. OOPS #someone’s insomnia’s been acting up (mine) #i have some lines i’m Very Pleased With coming up in vesties chapter 5 and in a yet-untitled edeleth smut i’m chipping away at #that smut fic is gonna be a lot of fun. #i’m trying to only work on it after i get through some of the vickyvesties though #stergeon can have little an edeleth as a treat #but only after talking shit about silver snow

[crybabyddl]

Looking Sharp

Part 2

Keith Kogane x Fem!Reader

Warning: smut, knife play, degradation, praise, dirty talk, swearing. Please do not interact with this content if you are not 18+

Author’s Note: happy keithtober, happy kinktober let’s fucking gooooo

^^^LMAO it’s been WAYYYY too long. Like, over a year. I’m so sorry to everyone who has been waiting for this bc I’ve racked up quite a taglist for this story alone haha. But seriously, thank you for all the support on part 1 and I hope you enjoy part 2!!!🥰

—

“You, Y/N, are a tease,” Keith’s look turns cold in replacement of the heat from his lustful gaze. “And I’m tired of it. Let’s see just how clean cut you are…”

His voice trails off, as well as his stare. His pupils are redirected to the thin, beautifully crafted knife, and I have no choice but to let my eyes follow.

He drags the weapon agonizingly slowly up my leg. The pressure is feather light. The ghost of Keith’s disconnected touch has my body temperature doing cartwheels.

“When I have you begging me to let you cum as I press this cold, sharp blade on the inside of those precious thighs of yours, shall we?”

Just when I thought my jaw was locked shut in disbelief and awe, his sensual musings easily loosened that tension.

“Y-yes. Oh my god, yes.” I breathe, reaching out for the paladin’s chest to bring him closer.

Keith evades my grasp and moves to spin me around, holding me flush against him. I can feel the dagger’s chill on my neck while his erection meets my backside.

“Not like you had much of a choice.”

—

It was almost too good to be true—somehow Keith knew my body as well as I did. The way he tightened his hold on me whenever I’d try to squirm out of his grasp; the icy stares he’d give me whenever a gasp escaped my lips.

Part of me felt guilty for enjoying this so much. It made no sense, but that didn’t stop me from worrying. My anxiety must’ve been evident on my face, because Keith seemed to notice something was amiss.

“What’s wrong?” He asks, his voice was softer, trading in his raspy, demanding tone for considerate and gentle inflections. The swordsman even lowered his knife, genuinely concerned for my wellbeing.

“Sorry,” I sighed, separating myself from him completely. “It’s just a lot all at once, you know? Plus, I never really thought this would happen. I mean, you’re… you, and I’m just me. It doesn’t make much sense.”

“What are you talking about? That’s ridiculous, Y/N.” Keith’s eyebrows arch as he searches my eyes for an indication of some sort.

“I– well, I just got overwhelmed is all.” I shrugged as my mouth formed a grimace.

“No, not that part. I totally understand that, and I feel it too! I’m talking about the whole ‘you’re you and I’m just me’ thing. Why would you think that?” Keith actually looks pained when he repeats my own words back to me.

“Think about it, Keith. You and I are so different and if something like this never happened, we probably never would’ve known how we felt about each other. And if you take into account our personalities in general, anything between us is bound to end in disaster. Like I said, we don’t make much sense.” I look down at the floor, unable to meet his—without a doubt—awkward sympathetic gaze.

“We don’t have to make sense! We just have to like being around each other! I’ve never felt this way with anyone before; do you know how hard it is for me to admit something like that? There’s no way to know what happens or what’ll become of any of this, but it’s not important right now. I never thought I’d be the one to say that, but it’s the truth.”

“I guess I just thought that you were too good for me. I mean, you’re a paladin of Voltron for fuck’s sake!”

Keith stays silent for a moment, smiling softly to himself as he looks down at the ground.

“Keith?” I try to recapture his attention, waving a hand in front of his face. He laughs again.

“Are you kidding? You’re practically perfect! Smart, kind, funny, a badass fighter, and god, you are so pretty.”

“I’m far from perfect, silly. Besides, that’s how I feel about you!” I feel my cheeks burning, but try my best to ignore it.

Keith closes the distance between us and gently grabs my face with both hands. Before I can think better of it, my hands find their way on top of his, keeping his touch there.

“Will you ever learn to take people for their word?” He chuckles.

I lean into his touch, and I could’ve sworn my heart was beating out of my chest in that moment.

“Probably not.” I shrugged, looking up at the paladin and giving him a sly smirk.

He rips his hands out of my grasp, my cheeks becoming cold from the sudden loss of his touch.

“Well then,” Keith is quick to sweep his leg under me, sure to catch me before I trip, laying me down gently on the floor. My breathing becomes ragged as he positions himself over me. I feel trapped, but I don’t mind it now. “I guess I’ll have to take care of that, won’t I?”

“Good luck with that.” I say nonchalantly, or at least as nonchalantly as possible. I was doting on his every breath, impatiently anticipating what his next words, movements, or touches would be.

“Thanks. Not that I needed the encouragement, but I will say it does help.”

The silence that would’ve formed between us is swiftly overthrown by my sudden gasp as Keith brings his knife back into the equation. He has it against my cheekbone, the blade is horizontal as its steely edge rests upon my skin.

“Does it turn you on that your life is in my hands?”

“I trust you.” I tell him. He would never hurt me, at least not without my consent. Despite his confidence on the battlefield, he was typically quite awkward in conversation.

“Oh, that’s sweet, you think this is about trust. I could do whatever I wanted to with you right now. You’re just my plaything and you won’t be forgetting that by the time I’m done with you.” His smirk is subtle, but it brandishes its image in my brain with hot iron.

He’s still on top of me, but he’s apprehensive, meaning I can still take control of the situation. I use the opportunity to grab him by his collar, yanking him down so his face is mere inches from mine. His dark blue, almost indigo eyes are locked into mine. He seems more vulnerable, but Keith always shields himself from others to some degree.

“Well tough shit, paladin. I don’t answer to anyone but myself.”

“Is that so?” he looks skeptical. “Well if that’s the case, then I guess I’ll be on my way out–”

“Wait!” I place my hand around the back of his neck, releasing my other hand from its grip on the collar of his shirt.

Keith eyes me, offering a quizzical hum.

“Please stay. I was just trying to be sexy and defiant! I don’t actually want you to go.”

While his expression gave no insight as to what he might be feeling, I could tell Keith was affected by my confession. I just wasn’t sure how. He was sitting up straight now, a distance created between us.

The moment was only a few seconds away from being awkward when I heard him scoff. Not only that, but that same smirk from before had returned.

“You were trying to be ‘sexy and defiant’?”

“Uh,” I swallowed hard, but not audibly. “Yeah. Those were the words I chose to say out loud.”

“I’m sure you’re wishing you’d chosen something better to say, aren’t you?” He laughed into the last word he spoke.

I nodded.

“That’s the thing about honesty,” he pauses, leaning back over me, looking directly into my eyes. “It leads to weakness.”

His words sent fire down my sternum. Feeling the cool metal of his blade return to my neck shot that heat downward, pooling in my stomach and searing against my clit.

—

Looking Sharp Taglist: @tompetersebbuckyhazleo @iris-iiridescent @deadgirlvamp666 @thevalkyriee @growingupnrealizing @fookinslut4harry @fictional-addiction

#keith kogane #keith kogane x reader smut #keith kogane x reader #keith kogane one shot #keith kogane imagine #keith kogane smut #keith x reader #smut #voltron x reader smut #voltron x reader #vld x reader #voltron fic #voltron fanfiction #vld fanfiction #voltron smut #vld smut #vld x reader smut #vld keith x reader #vld keith #voltron #vld #voltron legendary defender x reader #voltron legendary defender #keith kogane fanfiction #crybabyddl writing #voltron fanfic #vld fic #keithtober 2021 #kinktober 2021

[hamartia-grander]

Alrighty here’s mah lil ranty rant (But long, many apologies I dunno how I could shorten it)

Let’s start with Ada bc mommy- I mean mommy- I mean- (/j)

Ada Wong:

-So I see a lot of people trash Ada for the fact her personality seems to be more cold. She has distant she’s cruel (although she still seems to have lines she won’t cross, like with Wesker and the Las Plagas sample). I see people complain about that but I would like to make a hot take, here: it’s actually better. She’s a mercenary. She’s a gun for hire- her job has to be cold because she could be betraying her friends at any given second. In the older games, she was sort of just… I don’t know… A bit too human for the job, and the role in the story that she is meant to fill. I see people describing her as a Bella, and honestly, I strongly disagree. In fact, I would argue that the original was more of a Bella then the remakes. This is because all she was really there is for the generic “Ooh look pretty woman, bad ass eye candy” trope. I’m not saying that she didn’t have any depth as a character- I’m just saying that the remake gave her much more credit as a character, and made her much more interesting.

all right, moving onto the old man. (#1 Wesker hater over here I’m sorry I’m not sorry lol)

Albert Wesker:

-I know that I hate this guy, but even I have to appreciate that out of quite a few of the Weskers that have been made, this version is just better written. I see people complain that he is too angry and honestly, I disagree. The fact that he has a hidden anger, makes sense from a character perspective. And he’s getting increasingly more cheesed off at Spencer for obvious reasons. No wonder he’s pissed. Personally, I think the fact that they’re showing that he has emotions- he’s just learned to control them- is honestly much more compelling. I still hate the guy, but I can see where he’s coming from- in a twisted and a messed up way.

yeah. That’s it l. that’s all I got for him. I don’t really like him that much so he doesn’t deserve a whole essay like Ada imo. (Still like his character, though he’s very interesting.)

that’s my rant. Thanks for hearing me out -> I know this was ridiculously long. That’s why I asked permission first. I basically just wrote an entire essay in your asks and I am so sorry lmao

hjadsg no need to apologise. I may have to contest you for #1 wesker hater tho,,, 👀 I hate his guts too

BUT you're absolutely right the DLC added so much depth to their characters. and personally made wesker MORE hate-able to me personally because we just further see how messed up he is, to the point where even Ada - who has had to numb herself to the details of the job to survive - had visible negative reactions to his genocidal nonsense. I loved Lily's performance in the base game but she especially got to shine in the DLC, she absolutely nailed the cold look with emotion hidden underneath. Ada's cold exterior is her armour against her own emotions, she can't take a second to feel as that could be the second she dies, she doesn't have the luxury of emotional vulnerability; even though she does feel, she does care, she cannot afford to let herself. And little things like eye movements, lip twitches, subtle body language, and her inflections were all techniques Lily used to portray that tumultuous relationship between Ada and her feelings, and Lily did fucking amazing at it. Best Ada performance ever. Ada's never been allowed that depth before because she's always had to be palatable to the male audience :) so I'm glad she's finally getting it. And Wesker finally feels like a real villain, rather than just another power hungry white guy (which, he very much is, but now there's depth to it lol). Wesker's dialogue in the DLC is scary, and it makes the audience more aware of what exactly he believes and what his motives are. This DLC added so much to the base game that really drives it as my favourite RE game.

#and ofc Ada is mommy #Ada Wong #albert wesker #resident evil 4 remake #Separate Ways #resident evil 4 #resident evil analysis #asks