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abirddogmoment · 13 hours

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A lot about Mav's decline and a little about how it makes me look at Rory.

I didn't talk about it very much here, but Mav was really subtle in his signs of pain when he was declining from his spine injury. Some of the things that tipped me off were changes to his gait, lower tailset, slower movement, reluctance/slowness getting on or off furniture, and needing extra cuddling. These things could easily be brushed off as him being tired or him being disinterested, and it really made me doubt what I was seeing.

I was sure Mav had something really wrong with him, but it was so hard to convince the vet of that. She said things like "are you sure you didn't just train him not to jump on the furniture?" and "sometimes dogs slow down as they age", meaning well but ultimately making things a lot harder for me. This, coupled with Mav's happiness at the vet and overall stoic personality, gaslit me into thinking I was imagining things. I googled things like "munchausen by proxy symptoms" because I needed to know if I was the real problem.

When Mav went for his OFA hips and elbow rads, I had them take spine rads as well, hoping it would answer my question and help find out what was wrong with him. When his rads came back normal, I cried. It was partly in relief that it wasn't something structural, but also partly desperation that I couldn't prove something was wrong.

I pushed my vet to refer Mav for a neuro consult. It took four months to get her to agree and then for the neuro clinic to schedule Mav in. In that time, I started tracking his decline with a special quality of life chart I made specifically for him. It showed a degeneration of his QOL, but I still thought maybe I was dramatizing things and imagining it.

When Mav went for his neuro consult, they took him back for tests for ten minutes, then came back and solemnly told me they were certain his problem was neurological. They then asked me if they could take him back and let their vet students do the (non-invasive) tests on him for practice because he was such a happy dog. Of course I said yes.

They told me he wasn't a good candidate for surgery. I could do an MRI, but it would be expensive and wouldn't add much besides a formal diagnosis. They recommended palliative care.

I sobbed while driving home. Part of it was relief that I finally knew I wasn't imagining things. Most of it was heartbreak.

I scrutinized Mav's final decline because I couldn't let him suffer. I had hard lines ("when he can't run" and "when the painkillers stop working") and he reached those, but he was still so happy. He still had so much joy in his life. I made the call anyway.

The day came. He trotted into the vet's office like he was meeting his best friend at a restaurant. The vet carried him back to get a port and he wagged his tail the whole time. He scarfed down an entire fistful of cookies.

It was still, without a single doubt, the right choice for Maverick. I have thought about it from every angle, torn apart every single decision, and there's nothing I would do differently if I could go back and do it all again.

Now Rory came to me with a weird gait. She came to me with occasional dorsal shivers (the skin thing horses do) and extremely occasionally bunny hops while running. Not enough for me to think there's something seriously wrong with her, but enough for me to send videos to her breeder. I tried to believe it was just a symptom of puppy uglies or that she just needed more time to grow gracefully.

I debated it for two months, but I finally took Rory for an assessment at a sports physio vet here in town. When I filled out the intake form, I made it clear that I could be concerned over nothing, that this could be a waste of $85 and an hour of our time.

She scheduled us in, did her hands on assessment, and found a knot in Rory's thigh. She gave us some stretches and we have a few more rechecks, but Rory should be totally fine and her gait should improved within the week. All the symptoms point towards a longterm overcompensation to reduce weight on her one leg.

I felt so stupid going into the sports vet today. I almost cancelled my appointment twice because I was sure I was imagining things. Even when she was examining Rory, I was preparing my apology for wasting her time.

Rory is going to feel better. She's going to get to grow up without the effects caused from an overcompensation from shifting her weight in a weird way. She probably would've been fine even without the appointment, but she's going to be even better now.

It's a whole lot of text to say something cliché like trust your instincts or don't overthink it, but it is what it is.

#dogblr #about mav #about aurora #tw sick dog #(mav not rory)#tw euthanasia #mav memories #if im missing a tw tag just let me know #anyway this post is mostly so i can go back later #the next time im doubting myself #and remember that my brain is mean to me and i can just....... trust...... my eyeballs......

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hashtag-xolo · 5 months

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Tzapo had to go in for an ultrasound due to some scary gastrointestinal issues that were not explicable by multiple disease panels or nutritional panels. A mass was found in his colon and has been sampled for biopsy. Fingers are extremely crossed that this is just a benign polyp and not cancer.

#tw sick pet #tw sick dog #tw cancer #i am very much not okay right now

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dracharenae · 1 year

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✹ — I’m taking my dog to the vet tomorrow to test for pneumonia. If it’s not pneumonia, I have no idea what she has. I’ve already had her tested for cancers, heart disease, everything, and she’s clean as a whistle.

I just want answers why my dog is sick. That’s all.

#nσt α drαgσn ; вut cєrtαínlч α sαlαmαndєr ( ooc )#mobile post.#tw negativity #tw sick dog #|| I feel sick ngl #this dog is my whole world #I just need answers #I need solutions #I also just wanna go hooome #two more hours at work #well 3 counting the drive #but still

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yoohyeontual · 1 year

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Puppy is okay 🥰

#well he’s not getting worse for now at least 😭#they took some blood to test if he need more potassium or if he pee so much cause of diabetes #and I hope really bad that it’s not diabetes isn’t he suffering enough 😭#but physically he is okay everything is fine other than it’s heart #he’s sleeping now going too many emotions going to the vet kcbdjdjd #he couldn’t stop moving the vet is so kind but you could see under all the comfort they try to show him they were annoy fkdbjdbd #and me and my dad tried to calm but nothing work without touching him but we couldn’t get in the way neither poor baby fkdbjdjd #that makes me feel better being alone with him for so long like yes I’m always worried about his heart #but at least no worry add to all of this :’)#except if they tell us he has diabetes but still not bad enough for me to freak out #alex.txt #tw sick dog #tw sick pet #tw sick animal

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atlas-panthera · 9 months

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We have so much trauma tied to sick dogs and it's. It's really setting off dissociation really badly. I feel like a melted mess of everything and I am losing time worse than usual as a result. I hate this. The vet visit isn't until tomorrow morning and I struggled to even get it set up because sick dog = trauma flashbacks and more time loss and we hate this

#sick pet #tw sick pet #sick dog #tw sick dog #negative #vent

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pleucas · 8 months

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indelible

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sickficideas · 5 months

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sigma has a very sensitive tummy...sometimes the stress is all too much!

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dapperenby13 · 5 months

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Sometimes I remember mori’s impact on dazai and Yosano. They are two very different characters, but they both reflect him in such sickening ways. It’s like looking into a warped funhouse mirror and seeing the person who did this to you.

Dazai is a liar and a schemer. Skills he learned under Mori

Yosano is a violent sadistic doctor. Something directly learned, whether it’s her way of taking it back or not I’m not sure. But it’s so heartbreaking to think about.

They also both have his eyes at times.

Okay gonna go sit in a cave about this.

#just #ughhh #dazai and Yosano are so different #but they are directly impacted by the same sick man #and they can act so much like him #v says things #bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #bsd analysis #kinda #dazai osamu #yosano akiko #mori ougai #tw Mori #Yosano’s backstory #dazai 15

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the-last-f2p · 10 months

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teenager Reader who feels insecure about their scars for (yandere) oda ( yandere) ango and (yandere) dazai ( together platonic ofc and I would like for reader to be fem or gender neutral)

TW: Gender neutral reader, swearing, yandere behaivour, implied kidnapping, I feel like Dazai was close to manipulating reader but bbg Ango saved the day.

Oda has been increasingly getting worried about you. Maybe it was just a teenage thing? But Dazai never acted like you were doing so queue worried father figure.

Ango on the other hand could care less are you dying? No? Then it doesn't really matter. He does care though he's too sleep deprived to give any fucks .

Dazai knows exactly whats going on. He knows everything about you and it's absolutely not creepy! He just really likes you to the point of not obsessing over you.

So when they all gather around to figure out what the hell is wrong with you well Oda and Ango try and figure it out Dazai is trying to brainstorm ideas on how to off himself. But he'll occasoinally put in some input.

And after 1 painstaking hour Dazai finally speaks up

"Oh is that what you're trying to figure out? Oh they're self concious cause of their scars." Dazai just smiles like he wasn't messing with them and that he deffintly only figured it out at that moment.

Shock.

Absoulte shock and then aggressive calling of you they were practically screaming for you to come to the Lupin.

You rushed there obviously thinking that something horrible happened but oh? But the trio where all there looking perfectly fine well as fine as they usally are.

"Why didn't you tell us? Do you not trust us?" Ango started giving you a worried mom look what is he talking about.

"I-" You were slightly confused but Ango continued "Is it because of Dazai?" You mean depending on what it was it could be but you decided to just say.

"Why would it be because o-"

"If it's cause of me I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you self concious about your scars Y/Nnnnn..!" Dazai says in an over dramatic tone.

"Be quiet." Finally someones on your side "They're obviously not gonna tell us." You were about to thank Oda but you got bandages chucked at your head. Wait..

"Here. Maybe you can use these? Out of sight out of mind.. Oh that was stupid sorry.." Oda smiled at you awkwardly it was nice of him you guess?

"But thoughtful~" You add on to what he said. "GASP Y/N has bandages are you gonna match with me are you are you are you?" Dazai picked the bandages out of your lap and started to unravel them "Can I put 'em on? I'm an expert y'know?" Dazai grins.

"Well I haven't decided yet..." "C'mon pleeeaasssee.?" "LEAVE THEM ALONE DAZAI" "Pleeeaaassseee Ango?" You tuned out the rest of the conversation but you felt a little more comfortable now with yourself , your friends, your everything. That's great anything to make you feel comfortable in one of their houses unable to leave. For your saftey of course.

#i am like so god damn sick so I decided to write this #yandere #tw yandere #yande.re #male yandere #bsd #bungou stray dogs #yandere bungo stray dogs x reader #yandere bungou stray dogs #yandere dazai #yandere osamu dazai #yandere oda #yandere odasaku sakonosuke #yandere odasaku #yandere ango #yandere sakaguchi ango #yandere ango sakaguchi

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parasiticallyyours · 4 months

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yeah youre cool i can beat your face in with a rusty pipe and fuck your gouged out eyes

#bpd #actually borderline #im gonna pop into a ball of confetti #g0rewh0re #i might be batshit fucking crazy bitch idk #n3crophilia #tw necrophillia #put me down like a sick dog #:3 #gorewhore #g0r3c0r3 #g0recore

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boiledegghole · 1 year

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erm. what the scallop. was that the barclay street flood

(this is fanart of my wonderful scaredgirls malley and. dead malley. from “exercises in gratitude (The Barclay Street Flood)” by @redeyedsheepskull. the letters on the bag are spelled in the canonical splatoon inkling language. it says rice)

alternate colors under the cut, photosensitivty and eyestrain warning

the original black and white edition! i really enjoyed doing that eel. i will include prototypes of him later in the post

the scaredgirl edition! it’s for malley, my wonderful scaredest girl ever. i cant explain why the scared color is green but it fits somehow

the deadmalley edition! i actually came up with this color scheme first, but i wanted to include a paired one for malley. besties!

the Uh Oh edition!

the RED edition. teehee

the BLOODPACT edition (i tried this color scheme with kosh’s scene and i thought it slayed. evilcore)

the blue edition! i felt sad not including a blue one, so i added this one in last minute

now for the prototypes!

the prototype..... thank you scaredgirl. she looks like a gnome or some sort of tiny elf

im so sorry dm. i wasnt sure if i wanted you further in frame but the back of your head reads less like a head and more like a loaf of sourdough bread

i loved drawing this eel. god i love eels theyre so silly

i was really proud of that boat. this is the epic boat edition from before i put all the drug guys on there. i even cropped everything out for boatviewing convenience

#boiledegg art #barclay street flood #splatoon #i can tag this one splatoon this time because theres. an inkling and octoling there. kosh im so sorry but just your hands dont count #ditherpunk #i was sick as a dog finishing this but its ok. i wanted to #peace and love on planet earth #vaccinations beating my immunocompromised ass UP #tw eyestrain #cw eyestrain

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hashtag-xolo · 4 months

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He was seemingly doing really well yesterday but today he is too weak to walk steadily which is why it needs to be today. He's not hurting but he's weak. Once he realized I had some scrambled egg and ice cream for him though he was excited to move. This boy is so happy to have his favorite foods still.

#tw sick pet #sick pet #tw sick dog #sick dog #tw pet death #pet death tw #tw dog death #dog death

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dracharenae · 1 year

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✹ — UPDATE. so my dog does not have pneumonia, like i originally expected. no, she has laryngeal paralysis. she is going to a specialist next week to determine whether or not surgery is our next course of action, or if it can be handled with medication. more than likely, though, it will be surgery. her case is pretty bad. my boss did give me today off, so i've been utilizing that for sleeping. due to the stress of my dog's health, i've been having heart and chest issues this week, too, so that's been fun. i'm okay, it's just stress. i will try to do some writing this weekend, but no promises. my queue is pretty full-ish so it should bide me over a few days.

#nσt α drαgσn ; вut cєrtαínlч α sαlαmαndєr ( ooc )#tw negativity #tw sick dog #|| i will try to do some writing and to be active #i'm just very very tired and low atm #im okay tho #i just need some rest time

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yoohyeontual · 2 years

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I feel so much emotions and none at the same time right now