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#twst mozus
ryker-writes · 1 year
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TWST characters as parents (Staff)
Crowley:
proud bird dad
literally he is so proud of anything you do and will share your achievements with the rest of the staff
he also has a box of things that you've completed/given to him
childhood artwork, cards you've made, old gifts you've given to him, your first assignment and test, and even some of your old stuffed animals from when you were a kid
he also has a thick photo album full of pictures of you growing up
the kind of parent who takes so many photos
he looks through that photo album a lot to look back on the precious memories
the box and the photo albums are protected using magic
he will cry is something happens to them
pretty sure he lives at the school so you grew up at NRC
you know the entire layout of the school, visited every dorm, and even met all the ghosts
the ghosts all love you
they watch over you when Crowley and the other staff are busy
naturally you become a student of NRC when you're old enough
and once again, Crowley is so proud of you at orientation
he's taking photos as you walk up to the magic mirror and get assigned a dorm
he's so happy no matter what dorm you end up in
and if you want to change dorms, say no more it's already done
he's a little bit protective
loves when you make friends
he already knows if they're generally good people because he has their student files
it's a bit different if you have a romantic relationship tho
he's scared and will look into your partner more
will express his worries, but not to you
the other staff members hear it
"my child is growing up too fast!"
if you get involved with any of the overblots he is terrified and hovers around you afterwards
other students have mixed feelings about you
some will want to be on your good side because you're close with the headmage
others will be cautious of you because they worry if they offend you then they'll get expelled
and some (Azul) may try to take advantage of you
he's also painfully supportive
if you play any sports at NRC he has set up a cheering squad for you and you alone
also probably going to ask you to help him with his work
"won't you help your dear loving and hardworking father?"
when breaks come up he will give you the choice to stay at NRC or go on vacation with him
even if you say no to going with him he will try to convince you
he calls it parent child bonding
while other students may say he's not a very good headmage, he thinks he's great
he doesn't mind what the other students say, but if you were to say it...
he may start to consider that he's not as good as he thinks
what would really make him realize they were right was if you somehow overblotted
if you did overblot, he's full on crying and heartbroken
of course he's going to save you from the overblot
but afterwards he's going to just hug you and cry
he can be a bit of an overbearing father at times, but it's because he loves you
Crewel:
a more strict but loving father
he absolutely loves raising you
he calls you his pup
unlike Crowley, he won't keep a million photos of you or collect your first assignments or anything
but he is proud of the things you do
if you present him with some art you made or something cool you did he will be proud
the type of dad to keep your art on the wall
he also will spoil you
like you won't even know how much he spoils you
you'll be happy just to get a new coat and it's actually one of the best brands that costs so much money
his motto is "Only the best for my little pup"
this motto perseveres throughout your life
when you attend NRC, he's super proud no matter what dorm you end up in
when you attend school is when the slightly more strict side of him shows itself
he wants you to pass all your classes and will help you study
you might not get many breaks until he's sure you understand the concept and know how to do it
of course he's not as strict with you as he is with other students
they might not even get breaks
he will push you to get good grades but he always knows when he starts to push too far and will stop himself
if he accidentally does push you to hard he will apologize and try to make it up to you
Crewel is a bit of a protective dad
he pays attention to what his students are like so when you mention your friends he already knows them
he doesn't mind as long as they're good people
if you're in a romantic relationship he's a bit more protective
remember that motto I mentioned earlier? yeah that comes into play here
he thinks you deserve the best and will not tolerate your partner giving you anything less
he can be very critical of your partner and you may have to tell him to back off
he may also give your partner more work in class than other students
Crewel likes to make sure that you're dressed well and will tidy up your appearance when he sees something out of place
Trein:
very loving father
he already has daughters so you aren't an only child
you know how he treats Lucius? you get similar treatment
he is a doting cat dad and a doting dad
he spends a lot of time with you and your siblings as you grow up
he never wants to miss any part of your life
also will hang your artwork on the wall
he'll even bring some to his classroom and hang them up there
he will go on and on about you to his students if they ask
some may do this to get out of doing classwork
they find out later that they still get the assignment but now they have no explanation of how to do it
he's very proud whenever you complete assignments or get good grades
and he's very proud when you finally get to go to NRC
he won't really mind whatever dorm you get into
but he will worry if it's Savanaclaw
students in that dorm are more prone to fights so he's worried
like Crewel, he's a bit of a protective dad
he will slightly judge your friend choice depending on who they are but won't interfere with anything
unless they get you in trouble, then he'll say something
if you're in a romantic relationship, he will silently judge them too
will also be more strict towards your partner in his class
he will not tolerate them slacking off in any way
well...he doesn't tolerate anyone slacking off in his class but even more so your partner
when you're in his class, he is much more relaxed with you
while he won't let you sleep you can still get away with spacing out or not paying attention
you also get Lucius' attention while you're in the class
most students find the cat annoying and Lucius will glare at them, but Lucius loves you!
he'll lay on your lap during class and purr very loudly
whoever sits next to you may be nervous not to disturb the cat
whenever Trein and Lucius get separated he gets really panicked
unless he knows Lucius is with you
you're the only one he trusts with Lucius
Lucius himself is protective of you
if anyone gets too close for the cat's liking, he may scratch them
while Trein is more passive aggressive with his protectiveness, Lucius is more outwardly disapproving
Vargas:
proud dad #4
he's unashamed to be your biggest fan
no matter what you're doing or where you go he's cheering you on
he probably has you playing at least one sport growing up
wants you to be super fit and active
and he'll also feed you all sorts of healthy foods
he wants to be your role model so bad
he just wants to hear you say even once "I want to be just like you Dad"
if he does hear it, he's fallen to his knees and overwhelmed with emotion
he won't cry, but he comes close
super proud when you become a student of NRC
he doesn't really mind what dorm you get in, but he secretly hopes it's Savanaclaw
Savanaclaw is the most athletic dorm
no matter what dorm you end up in, he is cheering as soon as the magic mirror says it
Crowley has to tell him to calm down
he's not a protective dad
he encourages you to make friends and doesn't mind them at all
he doesn't mind when you have a romantic partner either
in fact if you introduced them he would simply hug them and get straight to bonding
your father has now stolen your partner for bonding time
where did they go and how long will they be gone? nobody knows
when they do come back Vargas will say he's part of the family now
when you're in his class, he already expects you to participate and stay fit
so he's not as worried about you as he is for other students
if you play any sports in school, he is coming to all your games and cheering for you
he will be the cheerleader
he's over there with pom-poms and everything
Sam:
you are such a spoiled child
like really anything you want, you got it
and I do mean anything
he has connections so he can get ahold of anything
you are his special little imp
he treasures the little artwork you make as a kid
it's the one thing he won't sell
he often trains you on how to run the store
so even though you may be small, he may still have you work in the shop
he won't have you do anything too big of course
but little by little you learn more about how to work and run the shop and you get to bond with him too!
but people are more likely to come again and buy things when there's a cute child
so having you there is also a business strategy
he's such a fun dad tho
he loves to play with you a lot and will generally do anything you think is fun together
he's happy when you finally become a student at NRC and it doesn't bother him which dorm you end up in
though if he had to choose he would say Octavinelle because they got the business strategies
he's not a protective dad either
he encourages you to make all sorts of friends
he even encourages you to make friends on the other side but never specifies beyond that
he doesn't mind if you have a partner either
they shouldn't expect a discount unless they are really good to you
speaking of discounts
you don't have to pay for things while you're at the school
he gives them to you for free
but he will ask if you want to help him out at the shop sometime
some students may try to get close to you so they can get more discounts (Ruggie)
and some may try to get close to you so they can get some of those business connections (Azul)
Sam hopes that in the future, you may be able to take on ownership of the shop
it's been in the family for a long time so he hopes he can pass it on to you
you have a while before that tho
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mawwart · 9 months
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He is THE ideal man and I’ve been ensnared
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siphoklansan · 9 months
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Footage of Siphok/Yuusona talking back to Crowley (it’s a daily occurrence)
[THIS IS A JOKE please don’t take it seriously💀]
audio by khadi on instagram
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nocoffee-notea · 3 months
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Mozus: *talking to Lucius* Come ‘er cutie bean
Divus: He does look like a kidney bean.
Mozus: I SAID CUTIE BEAN
••
Duece: Just a question, like hypothetical
Duece: Would you want a public proposal?
Ace: Public?
Ace: Nah, I really don’t mind…
Ace: Just that it has to be you.
Ace: …
Ace: ew that was cheese and gay
Duece: A double whammy
••
Lilia: Oh to be young and tired
Silver: Says the old and weary
Lilia: yea…
••
Trey: You’re awaky and bakie
Cater: *being high* I am baked
Trey: …and awake…
Cater: I AM?!?!
••
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Chibinimation~ Mozus Trein and his stepdaughter Cinderella
Yes.... Yes, that is all..... You can't tell me... that Lady Tremaine in her twst's version, doesn't love her stepdaugter...
Trein-sensei loves his own daughters, and his stepdaughter too!! Definitely....even iiiiffff the story would still be the same ahah (No ball, no prince, stay at home with chickens and mouses xD)!!
Does it means I'm a Trein-sensei's fan....Yes I am....
_Credit_
Asset game extract from @alchemivich and twst game
“Twisted Wonderland” and Cinderella's ballroom bg concept belongs to Yana Toboso and Disney
Trein and Cinderella animation concept done by me
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yeoroot · 1 year
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mediocremelatonin235 · 8 months
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Divus : Subs are so fun to play with. All you have to do is hint at what you might do, back them into a corner with a look, or grab their wrist in a certain way and they're a wide-eyed mess.
Sam : What the fuck kind of Subway are you going to?
Trein : Substitute teachers deal with so much shit.
Vargas : Guys.
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mayullla · 2 years
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I dont play twisted wonderland, but I wanted to make something for this fandom from reading multiple yan!twst. I kept most things vague, but if I got something wrong about a character tell me. One day when I am finally able to change my phone the first thing i would do is download this game TvT
Edit: I play Twisted Wonderland now-
Tags: fem!reader, child!reader, platonic yandere Characters: School staff
Imagine just a small child was the one who gets taken into twisted wonderland rather than Yuu. The small child doesn't even know where she was as the cat who was surprised kept bugging her with question after queation about how you got here and such.
You cant answer, you didnt even have the answers as you just remember falling asleep on your bed peacefully only to wake up in a huge box opened by a cat.
A talking cat at that.
Dear the stress you gave to the poor thing when you suddenly grabbed the cat's cheeks and just pulled them. Made the poor cat yell in pain.
Crowley found you soon after, shocked to see a small child here in twisted wonderland! As he too started to ask where your parent was and how did you get here even berating the cat for being you here. (The cat Grim just continued to vehemently deny that he was the one who brought you here!!) You could not answer the man, just cheerfully telling the man that you were sleeping in your bed only to wake up here.
After realizing that he can't get any answers from your Crowley just picked you up in his arms as he called the other teachers to his office. 
The other teachers were also surprised when they saw you in Crowley's arms. They had wondered why the headmaster suddenly called for an emergency meeting and expected a few things may have gone wrong or some sort sure...
but a kid??
Sam jokingly asked if you were Crowley's kid that he never told anyone about which Crowley pointedly denied. He soon explained what had happened.
The teachers tried to push you for answers, some almost demanding you to give them till you burst out crying for feeling so much pressure. Professor Mozus suddenly took you away from Crowley's arms comforting you in his arms trying to shush as he glared at the other teachers for being so pushy to a small kid.
Slowly they found out that you were from another realm, not from here and that they cant just easily send you off to your home.
Your family probably thought you were kidnapped at this point!
Crowley had an idea of sending you to an orphanage while he research a way to get you back to your home but reasons aroused that made it impossible to send you away like that.
That the teachers were forced to take care of you.
That would not be a problem at all…. sure…
Who will be taking care of the kid?
It was Mozus who spoke first at the silent atmosphere saying that he would be the one taking care of you tho he would probably occasionally need help if his teacher's duty kept him busy and that was fine with others.
A lot of students were shocked to see you in professor Mozus's arms most of the second years and up have to blink multiple of times or rub their eyes shocked to see a kid with the professor much less smiling at the old guy. The fact that he was also smiling at you made many students believe that this was either a dream or an illusion some choosing to forget the whole thing.
Well, as if that was possible when you follow the old guy to class listening in on the lessons... Listening to the old man or occasionally be seen drawing something while the old man would yell at the student who stared at you for too long.
Sometimes they found you to be with other teachers who looked rather awkward to the fact that they had to watch you. Sometimes they would yell only to hold their tongue when they realize a small child was there in their classroom and might cry like she did last time and they won't be able to fix the situation.
But time went by they grew more and more attached to you. They started to often fight on who you would stay with when Mozus was busy, not only that they started to ask Mozus if he ever wants rest they could help him watch over you. It was suspicious when they do that for Mozus who always deny their offer preferring to be with you than let others take care of you.
It was even annoying when Crowley started to ask Mozus if he could take care of you at that point Mozus's cat would hiss at the headmaster wearing a crow mask daring him not to go near you or even touch you.
Lucius was also the same with the students hissing at those who wanted to talk to you. The more curious students would often try to get close to while the teacher is teaching to ask who you were and if you really were the daughter of professor Mozus or any other questions that had to deal with the rumors floating around not before they were caught by a teacher and shooed away from you.
There were many rumors floating around about you and since they can't go near you and the teachers all give mixed or vague answers none of those rumors were able to be put to rest.
There were rumors where people thought that you were the daughter of Professor Mozus who gave his daughter to the other professors to take care of her every so often. That somehow Professor Mozus had either fallen in love or had a one night stand incident or just something when tho almost nobody could believe that.
Professor Mozus would often smile if asked if you were his daughter about it not denying or accepting the rumors to be true, while other teachers would quickly deny any claims of it which only made things all the more suspicious really. (Tho everybody saw the sour face professor Mozus had when asked about the mother.)
Mozus would get you to wear a more sophisticated look with dark colors and frills occasionally he would make you wear a more pastel lolita style, it makes you look as if you were really the daughter of Mozus which the professors absolutely dislike. So whenever they got you they would quickly swap your outfit that Mozus picked into something more their style. Crowley probably has a small mask and coat that is similar to his when he would make you wear as you go around campus carried in his arms as you giggled at how ticklish the feathers on the mask were.
When you are in Divus's hands you would be wearing a small white fur coat as he told you to straighten your back and chin up. The professor tries to make you a model somtimes and would nag you to keep the jacket on even when you feel stuffy. While Sam would make you wear clothes oh his color tones with an added skull as you try and help around the shop (most things he wouldn't dare you to touch would be placed on the high shelves). Same for Ashton where he would make you wear something of sports wear.
At some point, the professors started fighting for your attention trying to get you to come them that day with promises, candy, toys and even more. The students who have seen this happening cannot believe their ears so much so that they again choose to believe that all this was a dream and nothing more, choosing in the end to forget what had happened and when somebody talks about it they block their ears and started a shout as if doing that could deny them the reality of what has happened.
It was never said that Crowley stopped seaching for a way for you to go back. They didnt want you to leave having grown so attached to you, they wanted to be with you, they wanted you to stay while they became your official guardians.
So when you started to cry wanting to see your parents, they will soothe you by telling you that it was alright, that it was okay that they would be with you and that they would never abandon you. They would not disappear like your parents did and they would love you more than your parents ever did.
Really it is rather often that some of the teachers would fight over who actually becomes your father, sure all of them became your guardians but who is like your father? Sam is alright being your uncle so long as he was your favorite uncle but like it was never decided who is your father…
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naerwenia · 1 year
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I thought I already wrote all ideas I had about Mozus Trein, but no, I'm here to write more. Thinking about yandere professor Trein, but also more shibari with Trein. And if you have some ideas related to this, let me know! I’m more than open to comments!
Art not mine, all credit to the artist, it's just so cute ❤️
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amenemisa · 1 year
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First of all, let me say that it should be read from right to left ヾ(〃^∇^)ノ
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  Mori Ougai had retreated to his room for a few days because of the messes made by a few troubled kids at his school, trying to fix the mistakes those kids had made. He was too busy at work, but there was nothing he could do. He hadn't slept or eaten for several days. Now, just as he was about to complete the final parts of his report, he heard a knock at his door. "Come in," he said in a tired voice. The person on the other side of the door was history professor Fukuzawa Yukichi. He was one of those who noticed that the Headmaster had been locked in his room for a long time, and was beginning to worry about him. So he was thinking of taking him out of his room and inviting him to fresh air.
  Even though Mori Ougai knew his door was open, he didn't bother to raise his head and wished the person who entered would say whatever he wanted to say and leave. He prayed himself to that no further problems had arisen. There was a moment of silence, Fukuzawa was staring at Mori with his head stuck in the doorway. 'He looks pale.' he thought. When was the last time he had seen him this bad? After considering it for a while, he sighed calmly and decided to speak. "Are you busy Headmaster?" Fukuzawa asked in a monotone voice. As soon as Mori heard his voice, he revived and looked up at him. "I didn't expect to see you at this time, Fukuzawa Dono." he said in amazement. Then he took off his mask so that the eye bags, which were signs of his fatigue, could be seen more easily, and he leaned back in his chair. Mori tilted his head to the right and smiled, "Glad to see you here, I needed a break." he muttered quietly.
  Fukuzawa didn't enter the room, he leaned against the door frame and folded his arms.  There was a brief silence between them, giving him time for Fukuzawa to review him.  Fukuzawa knew he could take a break after hearing his voice, and now it seemed like Mori had taken away all his motivation to work.  Realizing that this was the case, Fukuzawa considered leaving him alone and giving him space to rest. "Seems like you're tired and busy. I can come another-" Before Fukuzawa could even finish his sentence, an objection from Mori interrupted him. "No! You're not going anywhere," Mori quickly protested, raising both hands in the air. Then he put his hands on the table and got support from them to lift himself up. "So!" he began, "while i find you at this time..." and muttered quietly.
  Fukuzawa was genuinely interested in the lessons and did not visit Mori often, it was extremely difficult for Mori to find him.  But now his opportunity had come his feet. He jumped up cheerfully and, with one hand in the air, began to list the things he wanted to do with him today. "We can have our lunch together first. And then we can take a little walk outside, I miss that- and maybe..." He started speaking slowly at the beginning and sped up towards the end as he counted his requests.
  Fukuzawa couldn't help curling his lips up at this sight. 'Revived so fast.'  he thought through it. Leaning tight against the doorframe, he waited for Mori to finish talking and watched him calmly. He had understood long ago what this heart-warming thing was, they both knew it, but was there any need to verbalize it? It had been a beautiful, relaxing and peaceful day for them.
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No one ever told me there was a game called Twisted Wonderland - AND AGAIN, NO ONE TOLD ME THAT THE DRAWINGS OF THE GAME ARE BY YANA TOBOSO! AND NOBODY DID NOT SAY THAT THE TWO CHARACTERS' VOICE ACTORS ARE THE VOICE ACTORS OF MY TWO FAVORITE CHARACTERS. Oh... ok i'm allright... whoa... So i said! Why not dress Fukuzawa and Mori like them and draw them? I can do this, right??
I must thank you again @madamlilac :')
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emyluwinter · 1 year
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Small spoilers!!And your favorite angst
Shoo Shoo!!! I warned you!!!
SHOO!
So… you mean….
Rollo hates magicians because something happened to his brother and he suffered because of magic?
(For those who are not aware of the book Frollo had a younger brother who led a very ….. ''easy'' lifestyle?I'm sorry if it was rude, I can't find a better way to express it)
Hmm! This is very interesting!
And of course your favorite angst.
what if…If Rollo's brother was hurt by another magician?
The scene on the bell tower. Where Yuu, Grimm and Mozus are trying to figure out the mechanism that triggers the Blessed Bell, and they needed to figure out how to remove the limiter from three strokes.
Mozus distracts the flowers on itself so that the flowers do not damage the mechanism and do not confuse the necessary parts to complete their plan.
But Rollo intervenes, realizing that his plan could go to hell because of them.
And in a fight between two magicians, one of Rollo's spells used in full force hits Yuu, who at that moment were trying to pull a tight lever to start the Bell Tower mechanism.
Yuu noticed a strong spell flying at them only at the last moment, Train did not have time to react due to the fact that flowers began to entangle him and devour his magic. It was too late. A thud from Yuu's striking body filled the room, for a minute all sounds seemed to be silenced due to shock.
-WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?! - Grimm broke into a terrified scream and threw his fiery blue flame at Rollo, buying himself some time.And ran up to the motionless body of the Prefect, trying to see how much they had suffered because of the spell.
-Yuu?Yuu?!Hey! Answer me!!Don't scare me like that!!
Cursing softly and finally somehow getting out of the flowers, Professor Trein immediately finds himself next to Yuu and the Grimm fussing next to him.
At that moment, Rollo suddenly realized that he was even worse than the man who hit brother with magic. Much worse, because he did exactly the same thing. A stab in the back when they couldn't even defend themselves. Nothing would work against a magic strike except magic. Magic that they didn't have originally…. ***
AND NOW IMAGINE WHAT DESPAIR AND HORROR SEIZED ROLLO FLAMME WHO INTENDED TO BECOME A TRUTHFUL JUDGE WHO CLEARED TWST AND IN THE END HE TURNED OUT TO BE AN EXECUTIONER! ***
Trein had to use all his knowledge of first aid to at least mitigate the effects of applying such a powerful spell. Magicians have magical immunity, which additionally protects them from the effects of overblots. Non-magicians have much weaker immunity. But it still exists.
But Yuu doesn't have it. Which only aggravates the situation and the consequences.
Rollo Flamme was tied up and literally chained to the nearest pillar in the Bell Tower so that he would not do something even worse. He could only indifferently watch the Professor's efforts to preserve such a fragile life in their hands..
The poor Prefect wheezed at every attempt to even out their breathing and moaned softly in pain, it was too much for their unprepared body.
-Hold on, child, I'll make some ice so it doesn't hurt so much. It will pinch a little.Look at the Grimm and breathe.
Grimm stayed close to Yuu and did not leave for a second, although he wanted to scratch Rollo's entire face to the very bones and set him on fire.
-Yuu…. - carefully nuzzling the Prefect's cheek, Grimm pursed his paws listening to their breathing.
-Professor, they'll be fine….right?
-They were severely stunned…but it's not a threat to their lives.
Azul suddenly crashes into the back of Malleus who is frozen like a statue.
-Ouch…please… don't stop so abruptly, you could….warn…
Idia, who is barely crawling after them, notices how pale and frozen they are.
-h-hey….what… have…..you….with faces….?
He notices the Professor and Grimm, next to Yuu's wheezing body.
-Oh. No…
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aifoslinrose · 1 year
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✨TWSTOBER 2021✨
ᴅᴀʏ 26-31
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eynnwwyjth · 11 months
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Mozus Trein aesthetic
The man and his cat.
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pumpkincarriage3 · 1 year
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Mozus Trein Character Analysis
You know that one teacher that you can't get along with because they're so stiff? But you live them, not for their personality, but because they are such a great teacher? Yeah, that's Trein.
Trein is an elderly man that clearly holds himself and others to a high decorum. He does not tolerate laziness, and blatant disregard for authority or the rules. He's extremely passionate about his choice of study, that being history. He's strict and will not give people any wiggle room outside of the guidelines he's set.
And I mean everyone. Crowley included. (Crowley himself can be found saying that Trein has subjected him to hour long lectures whenever Crowley does something particularly incompetent.) We see him getting on the staff cases just as much as the students.
Another thing to note, is that Trien loves his job. And he loves his students. The reason he's so strict is because he loves them and wants to see them to succeed. He wants them to be all that they can be and he wants to help them on that journey. What defines Trein at his core is that he is a perfect example of what it means to be a good teacher.
This is seen the most in the Glorious Masquerade event. (It is seen some in Endless Halloween, but not nearly as much as in the former.) Trein is willing to risk his health, his own magic, so his own students can get to safety. It never crossed his mind to do anything that would put them at risk. Even before the spread of the Crimson Flowers, Trein was the perfect example of what it means to be a perfect chaperone. This isn't just because he's a perfectionist, this is because he cares about his job and he cares about his students.
And this doesn't just stay in line with his students. This passion doesn't just stay with his choice of study. Ironically, Trein has been shown to be exceptionally doting. With both Lucius and anytime he mentions his wife. (I think he also mentioned his daughters in the same way a doting parent would, but I'm not one-hundred percent sure.)
He just isn't the type to lose his mind with adoration even though he more than likely feels it just as strongly. This being because he's a mature individual.
He is a calm, strict, passionate, mature person. And overall a perfect teacher. Something that the rest of the Twst Cast definitely need with the shenanigans they get up to.
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bloodredfeathers · 1 year
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For your drawing challenge 2-B on Mozus Trein please
Thanks for the request! I nearly started crying after doing his hair cuz I was so proud of it ╥﹏╥
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"These children are driving me insane..."
His cheekbones do be nice tho
Idk which request to do next, I'm gonna take a short break lol
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yomogi-mogi-mochi · 1 year
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Spolia (V)
Parings: Malleus/(Light Fae) MC // Slight Rook/Vil // Trein/MC (Parental)
Summary: You wondered why you ever got accepted into NRC but never bothered to look back when the infamous black carriage whisked you away from a place you could never call home. Having been handed an opportunity of freedom, of solitude, of hope- how come you're paralyzed with fear rather than excitement? Your sunny plein air sessions and nightly walks contemplating this has attracted a certain dragon fae with an affinity for your nimble gargoyle sketches and magnificent paintings.
Notes: Haha have you ever loved someone so much you wanted to crawl into their skin to feel their warmth and life and decay surround your entirety? Totally yeah me neither! Also working more on the Pygmalion inspired Rook fic still. I'm cookin up something real tasty lmk your thoughts and character analysis on Rook. @twst-hanaya ‘s analysis “Apathy Wrapped in Kindness” particularly struck me, and was one of the inspirations to this coming work.
CW: Graphic descriptions of vomit (I swear it’s plot/symbolically relevant), panic attack
AO3 Link Here.
Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 4 // Part 5 (Here) // Part 6 // Part 7
Masterlist
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You woke up with the sun beaming on your back, wrapping your exposed shoulders with its golden warmth. You didn't even remember falling sleep last night, especially on the floor of all places. Maybe you just passed out after all that painting.
Basking in the honeyed glow of the sun, soaking its radiance into ivory hair and nestling it deeply into your lungs, you were reminded of Lilia’s words. Like he suggested, it felt good to be exposed to what you came from. Here, you were weighed down by the effects of the potion, and at home, you were tossed into that dark room. All the naps you often took under the sun made more sense now, it felt like you were making up for all of the natural sustinece you were lacking. After rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you face your painting from last night.
Though generally, you fussed at the minute details of each piece, painstakingly perfecting each particle of every piece‒ that obsessive hunger that ate away at your heart last night was nearly gone, especially when you remember the contents of that letter. And unlike all of your pieces before, you imprinted your name into the piece.
Find me, find me, find me
You felt determination pool into your stomach, and you let out a careful breath so as to not shatter it. Looking around the mess in your room, you decided to begin gathering supplies for a busy weekend. Since winter break was approaching, the art club usually hosted a winter market on campus grounds with the science club, which provided much of the funds for club activities until the spring events rolled around. This year seemed to warrant special attention and efforts, due to a certain headmage claiming he didn’t have much funds to spare for most of the clubs this year. Something about unforeseen damages caused by overblots this year, you weren’t sure what that was about, not really keeping up to date with student drama and news circulating around busy lunch periods and Magicam group chats. Nonetheless, both the art and science club were especially fired up to earn some funds for creative and scientific pursuits. You decided you were going to sell some homemade paints, as well as set up some personal exhibitions for select members. In addition to all of the other booths featuring jewelry, pottery, glassware, and other artist booths‒ you already knew you were going to be stretched thin managing everything at once, so preparation was key.
You gathered some vials of paint and a few pieces from your hoard of paintings before changing into your uniform, and slipping your itchy wig onto your head. When you finished straightening our your appearance, our body automatically moved towards the chest on top of your dresser, containing the vial you choked down everyday. You numbed your body, running a still coldness in your veins to prepare for the burn to come. Throwing the bottle back as usual, you cringed when the viscous fire touched your tongue, sliding down each fleshy ridge in your throat. Again, you flushed the feeling down with water, feeling the fire push down into your stomach, and up again into your searing heart. You set the bottle back in its chest, turning to the supplies that were gathered near your door, wobbling towards the drapery you usually used to transport your paintings without any unwanted attention. Spreading the fabric, you wrapped the smaller ones in one, before turning to the biggest panting to encase individually. You felt your head spin at the sight of your work from last night, with your name delicately blended into the scene in gray paint. The air in your lungs rose to your heart, and tightened your heavy chest.
Please let me find you.
You hauled your body with all your mortal might, flinging your door open and bolted to the shared bathroom down the hall. The scorching bile that lurched at the back of your throat was just barely held in as you purged the bitter acid from your stomach. You heard a clink of glass as you realized you had probably brought the vial into the bathroom, but the moment of clarity soon ceased as liquid poured and poured from your throat. Though you told your body to stop, it didn’t. The bitterness just kept gushing and gushing out of you. Through your bleary eyes, you could identify the chunks resembling the cookies you ate with Malleus and Lilia last night, the water you drank just now with the medicine, and an unidentifiable toxin from deep within you that continued to spurt out. Against the waves that rippled your back into another fit, you felt a cool hand massage your back. You wanted to swat it away, but your hands clung to the sides of the porcelain. After what felt like an eternity, your body stopped expelling the waste from your mouth, allowing your vision to adjust to the bottle that rolled at the base of the toilet. When your shaking hand reached out to it, a slender hand plucked it from the marble tiles.
“What is this?”
Your head thundered in pain as you recognized the voice.
“Are you alright…?” Vil asked, looking down at your form with a twinge of disgust and worry. When you forced your weighted eyelids open, your dorm leader was sniffing the contents of the bottle, before swirling it around in the light above to catch its color in his eyes. “You shouldn’t be messing around with potions like this. You know what this is, right?”
If you could feel shame as a Pomefiore student who was supposed to excel in potions, you would. However, the breaths that you gulped in and squeezed out of your lungs was the best you could do. You were never informed of the contents of the bottle, nor did you seek to find out what it was. To you, it was just the medicine your mother sent to you every month, which you were responsible for emptying into your body without a single drop before sending the empty bottle back to her. You just sent a pitiful look to your dorm leader.
Vil furrowed his eyebrows, holding out the potion to your face. “ This , is a transformation potion, which you may know from your alchemy courses to be both illegal , and very dangerous if consumed in large quantities like this. The bottle is nearly empty, so, enlighten me , what exactly were you thinking ?”
You winced at each word Vil emphasized. From his stern expression, it was clearly coming from a place of concern, but deep shame bloomed inside of you as you were reminded of your blind faith towards your mother, despite ‒ even in your delirium‒ knowing her words were never to be trusted. You knew, but you couldn’t help but to curl into yourself, to tuck into your body tightly to shield yourself from the pain that was behind that truth. Why did you have to do this? Why did the gods condemn you? Why did your fae parents abandon you in exchange for a human child? Why? Why? Why ?
You slowly rose to your feet, ignoring the nausea that rushed throughout your body. Despite his dissatisfaction from a lack of answer, Vil supported your body against his, leading you back to the bed in your room.
“I’m obviously going to have to confiscate this…It seems you have your own situation so I’ll let the headmage decide what he’s going to do about this…” He gestured towards your messy figure. “But, in the meantime, rest . Otherwise I will be putting you on house arrest.”
Despite the threat of his words, you felt grateful for his understanding, however you still groaned and reached out towards Vil as a pathetic attempt to steal back the potion. Exhaustion etched in your bones as you just dragged your hand up, before gravity pushed it back down onto your covers. As much as you didn’t want to admit it, Lilia was definitely right, your physical body needed rest from the potion‒ the poison. You gazed with heavy eyes as Vil exited your room, vial in hand.
This is it. This is the end.
Your mind briefly flashed to the previous episodes of fury from your mother, a phantom tug felt at your hair when you remembered the times she dragged you by the root of its scalp to shut you in that dark room. Surely you were going to suffer for this, that was fact. You merely accepted it, and swallowed it through your acid burnt throat. When your eyes flickered to your painting again, your hands were already rustling the parchment in your pocket. Taking the letter out, smoothing out the wrinkles, you traced a featherlight touch onto the raised ink. As your back crashed into your covers, the smell of turpentine and withered paper enveloped you as you drifted off to sleep.
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Malleus walked his usual route to the library per his daily schedule since the cultural festival. He imagined exactly the location of the book, Spolia , tucked between one red, one blue book by each side. Even with the number of times he scurried into the library to check if the slip was gone from the book‒ he could never seem to remember or even register the other books in the library that were with it. He dragged his finger across the spines, stopping his finger precisely at Spolia . With a baited breath, he opened the book.
At page 1001, where the letter should have been, bore a crease in the binding of the book as if to imprint the absence of the parchment onto the pages. Malleus felt the pounding of his heart at his fingertips, at the soles of his feet, into the core of his ears.
I wish to find you.
He wondered what they looked like when they found the letter? Did surprise embellish your face? Confusion? Happiness? Sadness? What did they feel in that moment, feet planted right where his were? Malleus breathed deeply, pushing the oxygen from his lungs, through his stomach, and far into his hands and feet as if to feel the remnants of their warmth from the carpet and musky library air. He at least hoped they heard the same drumming of blood in their head as he was right now.
Flipping through the pages, he looked for any trace of them within each grain of the paper. When he found nothing, he sighed, slipping the book back into its place. Maybe he’d ask you if any exhibitions or showings were coming up to scour the walls for another breathtaking piece. He felt an itch forming that scrambled his insides, intensifying the ache that palpated the nerves from the tip of his horns, to the soles of his feet. Swallowing the saccharine warmth that spread on his tongue, he tamped down that feeling as he walked towards the Pomefiore dorm for the first time, without you.
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You felt so much better after that nap. Throwing up really sapped the energy out of you, and you were slightly thankful that it had, otherwise you probably would have carried on as usual and inconvenienced more people. You felt lighter, hopping out of bed with your new found energy and dusting the wrinkles out of your uniform. Though your stomach twisted a bit at the sight of your painting, you were able to wrap in its cloth without expelling all of the contents of your stomach once more. Gulping that feeling down with an entire glass of water, you began gathering your things, and headed down the stairs to begin another attempt in preparing for the winter market.
"Where is he, human ? We saw young master come this way, don't bother lying."
"I said I have no idea who you're talkin' about! Get the hell away from my face you brute!!"
You winced at the familiar volume of the first voice. Brute, as Epel put it, couldn't be more correct, as you remembered his forceful hands snatching the book from your grasp.
"Sebek there's a better way to handle this…" a third exasperated voice you didn't recognize added.
In trained movements, you slowly crept towards the entrance of the dorm, hoping with all your might that you could avoid whatever situation was going on. Truly, you did not know and you did not care.
"Cease your lies human! There's no living being that hasn't been graced with the name of the Great Malleus Draconia!!"
Your nimble hands creaking the door open stopped at that name. Malleus? Young master? So he was the one he stole my book for.
A thought flashed through your head.
Then could he have been the one who put that note in that book ?
The second that thought was finished, you felt a tightness in your throat. You pushed it down with the incomprehension of that being true. In this moment, where you were swiftly reminded of his status, not only being the heir to the throne, but as someone who was etched in the memories of thousands, even millions of people. Someone who is and will forever be remembered, and exist outside of his life and death. You were just a dismembered pile of hands, feet, hair, and innards mangled and stitched together to be stuffed into an artificial skin vaguely resembling something living. You would stop existing if someone did not look at you. Despite Malleus' kind eyes which filled your body with a bubbly warmth, you knew your "body" would just turn cold again when you looked in the mirror and didn't recognize the face casted over your flesh. It was impossible to love something without a face.
The searing warmth you felt at your fingertips that thawed your frigid veins disappeared, as you shrouded your body head to toe with a chill numbness you were used to pouring over your head like ice water.
"YOU."
Your shoulders jumped slightly at Sebek's pointed glare. However, the sharp ice that numbed your nerves suspended your expression into a dull look. "Yes?"
"You again, human. Perhaps you would like to enlighten us with the whereabouts of the young master since you're always trailing behind him like a stray dog?"
You almost let out a huff of amusement at that name, what a stupid coincidence, you thought, feeling a sense of painful familiarity. Yes, if anything the skin you wore was handcrafted by your mother to be a dog, rather than some crude image of a human. You mused the other faces your mother lovingly sewed into your flesh. A doll? A robot perhaps? Really, the futility that was imbued into your flesh the moment you were conceived was truly laughable . You pictured in your mind with bitterness, Spolia, once more.
" Enough , Sebek."
You recognized the deep rumble of the voice that came behind you. Malleus stood with a stony expression pointed at Sebek.
"Y-young master!"
"Young master."
The two Diasmonia students crowding Epel quickly swiveled around, sharpening their posture with a snap of their feet. Malleus held his hand to dismiss their formality in front of you and Epel, before turning towards you two with a sorry expression.
"I apologize for Sebek's attitude. I came to the Pomefiore dorm to look for you, but it seems I alarmed these two in the process. Really, they mean no harm."
Hot crimson spread across Sebek's face that made you a little concerned if he was going to stop breathing or start crying. The man with silver hair right next to him merely stood with a steady look, unaffected by the scolding of his partner. You shook your head, grabbing your supplies to escape his situation with or without Malleus, because numbness was beginning to prick at your chest, despite your best efforts in shoving that feeling far far down in your tingling stomach.
"It's okay. They seem like good guardsmen, you being heir to the throne and all. I'm sure they were just doing their jobs." You successfully balanced everything into your hands. "Is there anything you needed?"
Malleus lips sung a sweet laugh at the sight of your balance act. You pouted a bit when he began taking the canvases out of his hands.
"Young master I'll‒" Sebek jumped to take everything from his hands, but was promptly stopped the silver haired man. "Let's go Sebek. Excuse us for the intrusion, young master. We’ll be off now." He dragged the other man, who was huffing and puffing in objection.
“I wanted to ask you about that winter festival. I was wondering if you were going to be setting up another gallery.”
"Oh. Well, we are, but are you sure I'm not pulling you away from more important matters?" You asked, looking questionably toward the frustrated sputtering being yanked out the door.
"I was the one to seek you out, child of man. And further," He paused, flashing you a golden warmth through his viridian eyes. “You are an important matter to me.”
You felt like you were being swallowed by the light of his eyes. Eyes which did not pick apart your body nor instill a primal desire for you to extinguish your blazing heart with chilled detachment. Eyes that devoured you as a whole. If you could, you would crawl into those viridian hues of his and let him ravage your heart and sinew. But the blood that pumped throughout your body felt like poison. So, you lulled your gaze at the ground.
“I…you are that to me too. Important.” The dizziness from pulling your gaze away from Malleus’ own scrambled your words. “I was going to drop some of this stuff off in the classroom for easy transportation. Maybe I can give you a sneak peak of the pieces, ha ha.”
You two chatted about simple manners, like the pranks Lilia was up to nowadays, the phenomenal nap you just had, or your latest findings in research. During the walk towards the main college building your chest felt lighter, thawing the icy numbness still faintly at the tips of your fingers beside his warmth.
Find me, find me, find me.
Malleus peered at your expression. The sunset that swirled in your eyes, painted within it a portrait of ghostly longing and suffocating distance that he had sometimes traced back to you through a thin thread. It drew him closer in an understanding more deep that he could put into words. His hand twitched, resisting the urge to cradle your face in his hands, drinking in the colors rippling through your gaze and the warmth from the blood that bellowed under tender flesh.
I wish to find you.
You dumped your things on the table before taking your canvases from Malleus’ hands. “You can look through some of those pieces in that organizer if you want.” You gesture towards a tall shelf with various mediums filling the narrow compartments.”Just don’t tell any of my members” you said with a shrug, opening a cabinet and carefully filling your drawer with the vials of paint.
Your vision was stained a deep magenta, signaling that the sun was almost down. A cool, nighttime walk was just what you needed today after the day you’ve had. Soon, the magnificent moon began to peek her face in early through the vibrant sky.
“Are any of your paintings here, child of man?” Malleus looked intently each work, examining it with a careful gaze.
“Ah, no. Apart from the ones I brought today, I sold most of the ones I kept here during the cultural festival. The rest are in my room. It’s a mess right now.” You let out an airy laugh, closing the drawer full of glass containers as delicately as possible.
Malleus hummed in response. “I was hoping to see your paintings someday soon. It’s a shame most of you art club members don’t sign their work.”
“Ah, some of us do. But it's up to personal preference, really. But for some artists, you can recognize their styles with just one glance." You explained. "We artists etch our souls, thoughts, and prayers into each of our creations‒ they’re all laced together with a similar love. Maybe that’s why it’s easy to identify some artists, because we’re essentially just identifying a face.”
Malleus continued his attentive inspection of the canvases. “You artists are such romantic creatures. But that’s certainly a beautiful thing.” He chuckled. “But, prayers? What do you mean by that?”
Warmth spread through your cheeks, bristling the tiny hairs on your face. You attempted to hide it, leaning against a table and letting your hair cascade down your eyes. “Yeah. A prayer. Like the same way we pray to a god, artists pray to the world to be understood, to be heard, to be seen.” You brushed the parchment in your pocket. “To be found.”
The moon shined through the large classroom windows, illuminating the classroom in a dazzling cobalt blue.
“To be found.” Malleus repeated, voice so far it scraped against his throat, creating a dry rumble that echoed through your spine.
I wish to find you.
“Yeah. To be found.” You echoed back.
Find me, find me, find me.
“Malleus?” You tested his name on your tongue, enjoying the mulled warmth that spread with it.
He slipped his body next to yours. “Yes, (name)?”
“Do you ever look at the moon, and feel suffocated? Like, it’s just too bright and too beautiful and you feel a sense of…greed?” You really weren’t sure why you were rambling. You thought to stop, but you couldn’t. “…Or maybe longing is the right word. Like there’s this deep desire inside of you and no matter how beautiful the moon is, nothing can satisfy it.”
He paused, drinking in the feeling of your body expanding and contracting at each breath, feeding the blood that pumped warmth throughout your body. He was careful to keep his steady breaths as your arms touched leaning against one another, holding his fluttering heart in the muscles lining his stomach.
“Yes. Yes, I…it’s like a prayer, like you said. But one which spans eternity.” There were no words in any language enough to tell you that he understood that feeling more than anything in the world. During his lonely walks before, he would often gaze into the moon, yearning for warmth the share that feeling of hunger with.
You let out an airy laugh. “Sorry. I brought the mood down. But, the moon really is beautiful.”
“It truly is.”
The both of you exchanged warmth, feeling eachother’s breath through the gentle waves your shoulders made, side by side. Binding your own hands into one, you prayed in your heart.
Find me, find me, find me.
And for the first time, the slight ache that formed knots in your stomach when you pleaded the same phrase over and over again all those nights before, didn’t come. You simply melted into Malleus’ heat, reflecting the beauty of the moon into your eyes with little hurt.
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The morning of the winter market was something you simultaneously dreaded and anticipated. Though on one hand, you were both nervous and excited to finally give a response to the letter always tucked in your pocket, the winter market also meant winter break‒ which is when you were dragged back home by your mother to your family's liar. However, you focused on the positives for the time being. The exhibition was coming along nicely especially as you decided to entrust a majority of the planning to the underclassmen, you felt more energized after you stopped taking your mother's medicine, and the winter market overall had been going according to plan. You were even able to do something a little new this year, setting up a stall selling clothes, trinkets, and furniture donated by students and staff. Crewel praised your work, saying something about a perfect opportunity to get rid of outdated pieces in his collection. You hummed as you organized the clothes by color.
"Mx.D’aramitz. How is it coming along?”
You jumped slightly at that voice, swiveling your head to see Professor Trein, a pile of books in hand.
“Oh! Professor Trein. It’s coming along well, actually! Are those for donation?”
Trein nodded. “Yes, but I wanted to see if you'd take any of these books before I gave them away. They’re from my undergraduate days, and they’ve just been collecting dust over the years. There should be some art history books actually, I remember taking that as an elective with my wife…”
You felt a smile curl onto your lips. “Thank you professor! These books are normally so expensive…”As Trein set down the books onto the counter, you crooked your neck to peer at the spines. Pulling out a couple of books that caught your interest, you looked up at Trein, quietly asking for approval.
“Take as many as you would like Mx.D’aramitz, please. They’ll just collect dust in my office back home.” He quipped with a smile. You thanked him several times more, inspecting each cover with curious eyes.
“Are you going back home for winter break, Mx.D’aramitz?” Your gut clenched at that question.
“Ah…yes. I am.” There was nothing else to decorate your words with. You were being dragged back to that house without a doubt, and there was nothing in that statement but quick, sterile fact. The quiet concern swimming in Trein’s eyes elicited a further response. “Back to the shaftlands, back at my family’s company. The work never stops…” you let out a nervous laugh.
“Your family’s company? Not your home?.” Home? That was a foreign word to you. What was home supposed to feel like?
“Well, my parents mostly keep me at the company to manage things…" They don’t allow me much in that house unless to lure in unsuspecting businessmen.
"Do your parents keep you there that often?"
"No, it's not that…I…" your breath quickened as you fixed your vision to the ground, squeezing your hands and feet in hopes of ridding the tension. "I'm sorry. I-I don't know. I just‒ don't have the words right now." You gasped out.
A hand was felt on your trembling shoulder. "It's alright. As your teacher, I just worry about your safety. Especially after…” Trein trailed off, sparing you from having to hear how utterly pitiful you must have looked next to your brooding mother. Deep shame was renewed in your chest once more, helping the carnivorous pit of emptiness carve out the hole inside you. You let the heavy waves of oxygen ripple throughout your body to placate the aching wound. Looking back at Trein with practiced lightness in your eyes, you embellished your face with a polished smile that delivered into your insides a sincere repulsion.
“I’m fine, professor. I appreciate your concern. But I’m fine. There’s nothing going on that you need to worry about.” Your professor’s face stared you down in concern, looking for any morsel of deception in your expression that he could heave out. But, the rehearsed face you adored was impenetrable, fossilized under years of pressure. Even you could not break it.
“…Alright. I suppose if you say so, I must believe you. If there is anything I can help with, do not hesitate to let me know. It is my duty as your teacher to keep you safe and in good health. I will see you sometime soon, Mx.D’aramitz, I look forward to your exhibition.” The unknown tension you were holding in your shoulders melted away at his words as he walked away with a thin smile. You waved with a calculated calmness, before letting out a deep breath out your nose. There was no use dwelling on that, you had much work to do before the market opened in an hour or so.
You checked up on the stalls, making sure everything and everyone was in their place before searching for Crewel to confirm things on his end. When you spot him at the corner of your eye, you noticed you were intruding on a scolding of your Vice Housewarden, covered head to toe in various splotches of colors, laughing. You paced your steps to arrive near Crewel’s side at the end of his lecture, standing awkwardly for a bit for your chance.
“Professor Crewel…”
“ What ??” He swiveled around with a vexed look. Your feet backed up automatically, putting your hands in front of you to show no harm. “Oh! (Name)! Sorry, just scolding some bad puppies to prevent any happenings later on.” He shot a pointed look towards Rook. “Are we starting already?”
You nodded. “Yes, in about five minutes actually. I just wanted to check on your end before I’m headed for my stall during the first few hours.”
“Ah, I wish some of these puppies had the same foresight to plan like you sweet (Name). Were you able to check on the exhibition?”
A curse almost left your lips, but you covered it with an exasperated groan. You knew you were forgetting something amidst all of the excitement today. “I…completely forgot. My junior members are managing it with the help of some underclassmen though. I trust them, it should be fine…”
Crewel chuckled a bit at your reaction. “Alright. It seemed to coming together when I passed by it about half an hour ago. We should both get going soon. The market’s about to open in a few.”
“Thank you Professor!” You were already dashing to the direction of your stall. “I’ll see you around later!” Crewel waved at you, before turning back to your Vice Dormleader with suspicious eyes.
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Malleus wasn’t very used to this many students crowding the school grounds during this hour. It made him a bit dizzy, having avoided crowds and people in general due to the students’ perceptions of him, but he tamped that feeling down with his bubbling excitement. A small smile adorned his lips when he remembered his last experience at your art exhibitions, his expectations for a response for his letter rising steadily at the thought of that magnificent painting currently decorating his dorm wall. Lillia, who walked beside him and Silver, noticed his shift in attitude, grinning a bit in response.
“You seem excited for the winter market, Malleus. Any particular reason why?”
“Yes, I agree with Master Lilia, Young Master! Though you are truly radiant everyday, you are absolutely glowing on this fine day!” Sebek beamed.
Silver nodded. “Hm. I agree with Sebek.”
“I’m merely happy that I am once again able to see the art exhibitions (Name) has organized.”
“Eh?! That human??”
“Oh I didn’t know (Name) was in the art club! That’s certainly exciting, I haven’t been to an art gallery in some years…” Lilia quipped.
“(Name) is actually the president.” Malleus delighted. “I acquired that gargoyle piece at an exhibition organized by them during the cultural festival.”
Silver shot an exasperated look at Sebek, who was trailing a little behind them, mumbling to himself. “Your tastes are admirable, young master. That painting was surely exquisite.”
Lilia tapped his chin. “I agree! I wonder if I can find something similar…”
The market was filled with all sorts of colors, smells, and sounds, brought together in harmony with the sound of laughter and happy chatting among the students. Sebek parted the crowd with a towering glare while Silver trailed behind equipped with a stony look, allowing Malleus and Lilia to scour the market stalls for anything that caught their eyes. Trinkets, jewelry, handcrafted accessories, homemade pastries, and aromatic drinks were quickly exchanged for the seemingly endless madol in Malleus’ pockets. He was glad to be supporting your club activities through his monetary support, but he wanted to find you soon to support you in person. He carefully warmed the cup of spiced cider in his hands, scouring for your presence in the endless line of stalls.
“Ah Malleus! You came!” Once your voice sung from the stall across, and he barely paced his lengthy steps to let the rest of his dorm members to keep up.
“Of course, child of man. You invited me.”
“Ah. I guess that’s true. Wow.” You looked at Silver and Sebek, both adorned with bags upon bags of items. “Lots of shopping I see. Find anything in particular you liked?”
Malleus nodded. “Yes. This spiced cider is just divine. Here” he offered the steaming cup in your hands.”, you must try some. It reminds me of the drink my grandmother used to make during my youth.”
You graciously sipped at the warm drink, feeling the spiced aroma hit your nose. “That’s…really good. Thanks. I bet your grandmother makes a mean spiced cider.” Despite the chaos of today and the loud bustling of the market, when you were Malleus, you felt suspended in time and space by his words and his warmth.
He chuckled. “Indeed she does. Hopefully in the future you’ll be able to try some.” The future? You weren’t very certain what that was, and when you tried to imagine it, you couldn’t conjure any recognizable image despite how hard you tried. Just, darkness. You blew into your cup, staring at the swirling specks of spice in the sweet concoction to ease your mind from that.
“Malleus has been talking about you all morning, you know. He’s excited to see your exhibition.” Lilia tittered “We all are.”
You let out a nervous laughter. “Well, go easy on me. As much as I trust my fellow members and their planning, I haven’t had a chance to see it yet. Rushing around this morning and all. Wow.” You emptied the rest of the cup into your stomach. “This is really good. Thanks again Malleus.”
“Of course, child of man. Your kind is susceptible to all sorts of things, after all. Also.” He rummaged through one of the bags on Silver’s shoulders. “This is for you. Perhaps you can attach it to the device I got you, as I have done with my own.” He handed you small paper bag before showing you his tamagotchi, hanging on it a small waxing crescent moon.
You opened the bag to reveal a small metal keychain of a waning gibbous moon, shining in the sunlight. “Oh Malleus, I couldn’t possibly…” Despite your mind’s immediate objections to the previous gift you fiddled in your hands, you couldn’t help but to warm the metal with the temperature you received from the drink Malleus gave you, brushing your hands on the detailed groves of the charm.
“I insist. It’s akin to what your kind calls “friendship bracelets”, is it not?” You dangled the trinket in the light, adoring how it caught the light in the delicate details of the piece.
You let out a laugh through your stomach. “I guess. Either way, thank you. I’ll cherish it.” The keychain looked a bit strange on the plastic device, but you relished in the feeling of having something matching with Malleus. Friend . You clutched that word deep in your heart, securing it away from the poison that no doubt pumped throughout your body.
“What are you selling here anyways?” Lilia interrupted, raising a vial of Lapid Lazuli into the sky.
“Oh! They’re homemade paints I make sometimes. I have a horde of them back in my room, I figured it was time to let go of some of them.”
“They’re exquisite. I’ve never seen such color before. Your talents know no bounds, (name).” Lilia continued to look through all of the colors, carefully inspecting them in the light, Malleus following his actions in awe.
“Ah no, no. I just have a lot of free time to experiment. Some of them are made with rare materials, so I like to make the most of them as I can, give them the treatment they deserve and all. After all, I’m a Pomefiore student. We specialize in potions, this is just an aspect of it.”
“It’s true, (name). Perhaps you’d be able to make a living off of them one day. “
Ah, this feeling again.
“…Haha. That probably won’t be happening. My parents have a future for me in their company. After I graduate I’ll likely be stopping all of this nonsense and getting into real work. “ you parroted the words your mother spat at you when she found out you were trying your hands in creative pursuits. “So I may as well enjoy the time I have here with it.”
Malleus’ eyes twitched ever so slightly. “Your family…will you be going back during break?” He asked with a tentative expression.
“Yeah. How about you?” You deflected the conversation to him.
“We will be returning to Briar Valley, my home. Duty calls, even being a student here does not give me a break from my responsibilities.”
“That’s unfortunate. I hope at least you’ll be able to get some rest before you return.” You got up to stretch the tension in your back. “Well, I shouldn’t keep you guys from seeing the rest of the market. Have fun!”
Malleus gazed into your eyes with a honeyed look. “I hope you see you at the exhibition later?”
“Of course.” You answered with a smile as warm as his eyes.
A few hours passed quickly after that‒ busying yourself with your own stall, as well as going around to supervise the others just in case. It was truly a holiday miracle that nothing had gone dramatically awry. However, you did seem to notice a shift in the air, with the unusual amount of stares trailing a chilling anxiety down from your spine. What was going on? Oh well, you didn’t really have time to think about that, you had more important matters to take care of.
You walked from your stall, entrusting it to one of your club members, who was so kind as to bring you a small pastry from one of the science club booths. Licking the cinnamon apple filling sticking to your fingers, you headed towards the exhibition, which to your surprise, was very lively. With the strange stares you’ve had all day, you self consciously pulled your hood down, looking upwards for Malleus’ tall head. You rustled the letter in your pocket, brushing your hand against the tamagotchi adored in the present Malleus gifted you earlier. The cold metal that was melting at the heat of your palms gave you a little more bravery to walk closer into the crowd waiting to enter.
“Child of man. Here you are.”
“(Name)! You made it.”
The four Diasmonia students stood in their usual positions, completely parting the crowd with their imposing presence.
“Hey! I was just about to enter, did you guys enjoy the rest of the market?” You were glad to find that in their presence, people swerved out of your way too by default.
“Yes, but it was not as nearly as exciting as this. I look forward to seeing the gallery.” Despite his tranquil demeanor, Malleus could barely contain the energy bouncing in his chest that was threatening to explode if he didn’t find the mystery artist once more.
“Sure, I can actually take you guys through a shortcut. Though it does seem strange that the line is so long…” You stood on the tip of your toes, peering at the lengthy line formed at the entrance of the exhibition.
“Lead the way, president.”
You lead the group, snaking through a side entrance of the small building and into a part of the exhibition space. Malleus instantly gravitated towards one of the paintings, equipping a contemplative look as he inspected each piece. You moved through the gallery this way in silence, appreciating the works of your fellow club members before entering a central space in the building. “Weaving Love and Life into Art”, thin cursive announced on the wall.
“Is this a special exhibition?” Malleus asked.
You tipped your head to the side. “I’m not sure. I encouraged the other third years to take lead in the exhibition this year but I certainly don’t remember planning or hearing about this.” You looked at the mass of people gathering near a painting. “But it seems to be a success so I’m not really complaining.”
“President!”
You whipped your head towards the panicked voice. One of your younger members was furiously signaling you over to come, so you excused yourself from the Diasmonia group. You briefly saw them walking towards a huge crowd near the center of the room, and you quickly pushed the seemingly obscure anxiety down in favor of calming down your club member, who was nearly in tears.
“Are you okay? Deep breaths.” You guided them through a practiced ritual until their erratic breathing was slowed enough to speak coherently.
“I-I didn’t mean to…I really didn’t. I’m so sorry President, I didn’t mean to.”
“Hey” you rubbed your hand on their shoulder, ignoring the growing noise from the crowd. “, it’s okay. Have you ever seen me mad? I couldn’t hurt a fly. It’s alright, now, tell me what happened.”
“I…I was in charge of putting up all the signs for the exhibition. And I-I forgot to put the no photos sign so no one knew people weren’t supposed to take photos and…and…” They clutched their phone to their chest.
“It’s okay. It’s no big deal. A few photos is okay. I should have told the club so everyone was on the same page. It’s okay. We can deal with any repercussions later, though I doubt there will be any.”
“No you don’t understand. I violated your privacy…you specifically have asked for your work to be anonymous and…I’m sorry it was supposed to be a surprise, b-but I ruined it all!”
You quirked your eyebrow at that. What could have possibly given your anonymity away? Sure, your name was on the painting but it wasn’t your full name, and it’s not like people knew your face enough. Or you hoped. Swallowing, you asked “Slow down. What surprise?”
“We wanted to do something special before you left for your fourth year, in honor of all you’ve done for us. So we put up a special section in your name…but we swear! It was intended to be a private thing! But now I’ve ruined it all oh great seven…”
“I mean I appreciate the surprise, but what do you…” your eyes slowly drifted onto the phone they were gripping for dear life, then to the growing crowd around the center of the exhibition. At the center of the mob of flashing lights and phones held high to take a photo of the painting, your painting , you saw Malleus’ tall figure parting the center of the crowd, before stopping and staring at the painting.
Fuck.
You wished for the floor to swallow you whole at this moment, instead, you pulled your hood into yourself, hoping the shadow casted onto your eyes would just consume your body whole like the void in that room. When your ears forcefully adjusted to the chattering going on in the mass, your blood froze.
“Hey they kind of look like that ambassador model representing the D’aramitz products, don’t you think?”
“Yeah! Look at this, someone is already making conspiracies about it!”
Fuck.
Malleus felt like his body was being devoured by the painting, sinking into eternal depths of the boundless, cosmic black, and the golden glow of the hands held together in prayer at the center of the painting. Several more hands of a similar magnificence emerged from the prayer hands, either delicately lacing their hands together in a silent mantra, or surging outwards with a paintbrush in hand. His feet dragged as his chest was pulled towards the painting with an aching pinch at his heart, swallowing in the world of colors hidden in the golden warmth of the hands. Behind them, in a whispered movement, were hands that gently held out their palms towards the ones that flattened the flesh of their palms against each other. Like a delicious melody, the appendages melted against one another, simultaneously becoming each other and making eachother whole‒ and Malleus drank in that honeyed warmth with every nerve on his skin, absorbing it deep in his flesh and bones to etch into his hungry body. When his chest was merely centimeters away from the rough canvas, he gulped down the desire to press his body against the infinite black to be dissolved into the open hands, and instead noticing pretty cursive that made his chest almost collapse from the air he gulped into his lungs.
Find me. ‒ (Name)
This was infinitely worse than you could have imagined your confession for the stranger who left the letter for you to go. Out of all of the anxiety induced scenarios that had mulled in your brain every night, this was utterly out of your mind's comprehension. The blood on your body began to drop to your trembling legs, despite your nearly exploding heart pumping blood into your body with a vigor you’ve never felt before, numbing your body with an icy burn. The surrounding sound began to muffle and tightly constrict around your temples, disorienting you in its off putting bellowing echo that rang through your skull. Your eyes sluggishly drawled its gaze from the ground, rising to Malleus’ gaze that pierced through your body, pulling at your gaze with such intensity that it momentarily created absolute silence in your roaring senses. You felt your feet stutter backwards, the rest of your body moving automatically with it. Run , it told you.
Never had your body moved so quickly. The blood that had previously prickled your fingers surged throughout your arms and legs like boiling heat‒ commanding each muscle in your leg to run run run. You squeezed your eyes shut, in a pathetic attempt to hide from the reality that your body was running like it had never before away from kind eyes and that warmth that would cradle you with such gentleness it burned into your body a loving suffocation so fresh to your body and mind.
Find me, find me, find me.
That mantra that previously swayed you back to normalcy now seared the back of your throat. If you could somehow put your feelings into words, it would be no more than an infant's wail‒ kicking and screaming to go back go back go back, hold me touch me, love me, gods, love me please , no no no give it back to me please. You wanted to feel rage like the sun burning a hole in the sky, rage that split the tendons and flesh in your heart with your bare hands. You wanted to carve out a gaping hole in your body‒ opening it like the gates of blazing hell and reaching inside blood and sinew to drag out something deeper, deeper, and deeper‒ and ensure it's extinction tonight. But no matter the hunger hammering at every nerve of your body‒ you could not swallow that fire and ash at the tip of your tongue, enough for it to let it burn your insides so delectably and cauterize the festering wound within. So, you crawled on the floor like an infant child, cramming your grown body into a small, dark womb, praying that when you were born again, you could have the courage to swallow fire. The darkness cradled you fondly in its arms, opening its mouth to devour.
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Notes:
Anyway reader feels so bad about lying they throw up lmaoo I’m a nervous vomiter I understand but I love lying :) teehee
Also lol kind of accidentally painted Vil/dorm leaders as a RA?? Kinda funny though I imagine this is actually part of their duties at least to an extent
And shared bathrooms??? I think only the dorm leader/vice dorm leader would have their own private bathrooms tbh. Otherwise I think they have a bathroom between every two dorms. There's my Pomefiore bathroom analysis lol
There’s a phrase in my native tongue by Natsume Souseki that translates to “The moon is beautiful tonight”. My culture uses language to measure distance with each other, so outright saying “I love you” isn’t really a thing here. So it was invented to share love as much as our language allows, and I think it shows that you’re not necessarily trying to get rid of the distance that will forever be a part of “knowing” people, but reaching a hand out far enough to express your love. The moon truly is a beautiful motif. I love that bitch so much.
The whole thing about being unable to “break faces” is a reference to autistic masking‒ personally I find it hard under years and years of using masking as a survival mechanism, to unmask. Not even sure I would recognize my face if I could. Also sort of inspired by Confession of a Mask by Mishima Yukio but mostly my experiences
Like I mentioned in the end notes of the last chapter, the motif of hands/Praying Hands would be included in this chapter. The painting I described is based off of Mori's Buddhist hand painting from Blue Period (so good please read/watch). Except I added in the detail about the open palms based on when Malleus offers you a hand and asks if you trust him, because I thought that illustrating that the prayers were being answered via the open palms was an important bit to express. Also didn’t want to outright copy Blue Period lol
“Opening it like the gates of blazing hell” = reference to Mitski’s “Stay Soft” (“Open up your heart like the gates of hell”)
Kinda stole the last part from The Bell Jar, with the whole womb imagery and all. I hope death is as warm and enveloping as a womb
More angst to come >:) prepare to be obliterated
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