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the-cat-and-the-birdie · 5 months

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You don't need to worry about the ATSV fandom dying. As someone whose been in the Marvel fandom over ten years - I can assure you this is natural.

The ATSV Fandom Isn't Dead: A brief look into the science of fandoms.

[me standing beside Hobie beaming my thoughts of love and adoration into his head like I'm professor x]

A lot of people are afraid of the ATSV dying - and I don't blame them.

In the era of shows releasing all in one day, or movies coming to streaming almost immediately - it's not hard to say we're in an era were content is consumed at ridiculously rapid rates.

I mean, this time last year Wednesday was breaking records on Netflix. Where's the hype now?

I know you see it too, there's less posts everyday in the Hobie tag, less screenshot breakdowns, etc etc etc.

But I'm here to tell you - The ATSV fandom is doing just fine. Better than fine. All of this is meant to happen.

Let me put it into perspective.

ATSV released on June 2nd - it's November.

ATSV released a little over six months ago.

For reference: The Avengers (2012) was released on May 4th.

The Avengers DVD wasn't available for purchase until SEPTEMBER 25th - almost SIX months later.

The time that the Hobie fandom has formed and existed - is the same amount of time people had to wait just to see The Avengers again.

Large periods of time where tags only get three posts a day TOPS was nothing to fear. xReaders and fanfics held the fandom over until the next trailer, the next sneak peek or leak.

Prior to the release of streaming, only a little more than ten years ago - it was NATURAL for a fandom to wait six months before even seeing the movie for a second time.

And mind you - streaming didn't exist. If you wanted to see The Avengers again, you had to go out and BUY it. $26.99.

If you wanted to order it online - you'd have to get it shipped to you. Before Disney plus, we watched on BlueRay Discs.

And the fandom was fine and healthy.

If a fandom that doesn't even have a DVD release can keep up content for six months, I think we'll be fine.

But I'll admit - there's still the question:

If the ATSV fandom is 'doing fine' then where is everyone going? Why are the tags getting slower?

The answer is simple:

FANDOM BIOLOGY

I LOVE social sciences and the systems people create and how they work - even unintentionally.

And I have a theory - one about the natural evolution and regeneration of fandom. Hear me out -

When it comes to ATSV:

We are leaving the Analysation Phase, the phase in which content creation is centered around deciphering and breaking down the most recent installment in the fandom.

During this phase usually see art of newer characters, new ships, meta breakdowns, easter egg point-outs.

We were in that phase.

Once the Analysation Phase dies down, usually main content creators may remain. The intermediate or liminal period.

The intermediate is usually when you'll see more x-reader art pop-up, the levels of fanart evening out as artists return to their favorite characters - usually incorporating any new ones they gained from the last installment.

Shitposts usually also become popular around this time, as the shock and weight of the story wear off, and we're more able to joke about the storyline a lot more light-heartedly.

That's why the intermediate point is often see as the passion 'dying out'.

When in fact, it is the fandom getting comfortable. Resting for the next phase.

And after a few months, the next phase comes:

The Speculation Phase:

The Speculation Phase cannot come until the Analysation Phase is over.

During the Analysation Phase the fandom begins to breakdown and digest the writers intentions. They integrate the new character into the story, and the fandom.

As the audience and fandom talk amongst each other, we get more solid ideas of who the characters are, what their motivations might be, and most important of all-

What they might do.

In the Speculation Phase we turn from the last installment - and start looking towards the future.

Let's take Hobie for example.

Looking at the timeline of the Hobie fandom, we can see a progression.

Originally taken as a punk-rockstar and little more, throughout the months the fandom began posting things about punk culture, the 70's, Hobie's motivation in the comics, and how that all correlates to him.

As the fandom analyzed, the collective zeitgeist and understanding of Hobie grew into something a lot more sound, and telling.

We looked at the parellels he provides in the story, and what kind of person he is.

And because if that we have seen a marked improvement in people's contextual understanding of Hobie - as a punk and a hero.

And now that we can understand him - we can predict him.

The same goes for Miguel - over the months, a lot of us have began to question if we know him as well as we think we do , if we really know the kinda person he is -

And if we really know what he's doing to do.

That's where the Speculation Phase comes in.

The Speculation Phase in fandom is when we see some of the most passion - and instead of tapering off overtime, it builds. More and more until the next release.

The Speculation Phase is when the fandom takes the analysis' and from there, they begin to theorize.

Now that we understand, we can begin to predict.

And this is arguably one of the most interesting parts in a fandoms natural ecosystem.

During the Speculation Phase, we can see a number of diverse opinions appear.

As more and more creators begin to gather their understanding, tips from the writers, new released news, and past comic book arcs, we start to see dozens of triguing paths the writers can take us on.

As more news releases, the more hype people get. I mean - imagine how you'll feel when they release the first new poster of Hobie, or Miles? Or when we get to see Miles.G in the trailer?

And with each new poster, or trailer, we're given clues. The theorizes develop more. And the plot thickens.

It's all natural.

So I can understand the fear. Only getting one or two new posts when you visit the Hobie tag can be a bummer. But it's natural and it's GOOD.

Y'all, we need to conserve our energy. We are in the liminal phase. And they never last long.

With the news of the voice actors back in the studio, and a cliff-hanger like we have - I can assure you, it's only a matter of time before we begin to see the theories, the trailer breakdowns, the people guessing what Miguel might do, or exactly how much tech Hobie is hiding.

And when that time comes we need to be READY. I can already feel it on the horizon.

I really wonder what they'll do with all that left over Hobie concept art.

Plus with explosion of Hobie approval, I wonder if they'll add him in even more. Hobie fan-service anyone?

Hmmm...

But chill y'all, we're on the right track -

-------------------------------------

If you read this far, as always THANK YOU SO MUCH!! And as a token of my appreciation, I hand you this Hobie. Hold him gently please

Bye 💗

#no proofread ever ever EVER #spiderman #atsv #spider man #marvel #across the spiderverse #hobie brown #spider punk #spiderpunk #Miles morales #miguel o'hara #miguel ohara #peter parker

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pistatsia · 6 months

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Isagi Yoichi: problems with anger expression

Clickbait, right? One would think that what kind of anger expression problems could there be with a guy swearing on the field with war-crime level insults and joyfully bringing a child a few years younger to tears?

The kind where one derives from the the other.

Now, let's figure it out.

To do so, we'll have to go back to Isagi's novel (hoshi801_ translation is used for all of the quotes). From it, we know that Isagi grew up as a quiet and shy child. "He never gets into fights with his friends and never disobeys his teachers."

Nevertheless, it ended quite simply then - thanks to Noa, he learnt how to express his anger and negative feelings. Problem? Only on the football field. The novel says he "was fearless in running into his opponents, as if he had never been a crybaby."

He was winning, and what he liked best about football - his football, Noa's football - was the beauty of Noa’s playstyle brutality. Because that's what made it an acceptable outlet for him - fighting with friends is bad, arguing with teachers is not allowed - but on the football pitch you are free. You can be angry. Football became his safe space.

Except that then Isagi entered the root of all his troubles - Ichinan.

Even before it, the novel mentioned and emphasised Isagi's inability to express himself. For a while, despite this, his plans worked: the coaches let him play the way he wanted, and he didn't have to come into direct conflict with them.

But that trick didn't work in Ichinan - the dream school suddenly turned out to be somehow strange, and Isagi felt that he wasn't allowed to fulfil his potential here.

But no one on the team was unsatisfied by the current system.

Even before the conversation with the coach where he was ridiculed Isagi had tried to test the waters. Specifically to test - he doesn't say anything outright in fear of being rejected. "Uhm, Tada-kun… don’t you think there’s something wrong with this?" he asks his club mate very cautiously, while in thoughts having more direct “Huh? Am I the only one who thinks that this is ridiculous?”. It's written out separately in the novel that "he watches the expression on Tada's face to see how he'll react" - Isagi already has problems. He's already learnt that he can be rejected if his opinion doesn't coincide with the majority - especially since the conversation wasn't taking place in 'football territory', where he was more or less able to talk straight.

Having an opinion for Isagi means isolation.

But he still tries one last time - one that finally cracks him up, convincing him that the others know better and he just needs to be patient.

In the novel his friends are "Surprized, seeing the quiet and obedient Isagi talk to the coach" - again, he is used to keeping quiet and not risking. Still, he dares to - and is immediately ridiculed for allegedly trying to "show off".

And this is what finally kills in him the will to resist. Because losing his friends and football is more terrifying for him than losing himself.

What does the novel says about Isagi after this episode? "He is afraid of being disliked for being assertive", "always timid", "compliant". "When his friends get excited, Isagi would say something like this: “Uh, yeah… me too”."

"He just goes with the flow."

Isagi agrees with Tada's taste in girls, agrees to eat what he doesn't want to, pleases in every way possible just so he won't be abandoned. He obeys the coach's strategy, and even on the field - the only thing that gave him joy and was a safe place for him - he ends up obeying the rules his surroundings have imposed on him.

He doesn't try to argue, he doesn't try to prove anything - he just chooses the safest path, the one where he doesn't do anything and doesn't fight, but he stays safe. Not abandoned.

What's the conclusion?

Isagi doesn't know how to express anger at all. He just hasn't learnt it because he hasn't tried it. And most importantly, doesn't know how to express it correctly.

Why is it necessary (and important) to know how to anger correctly in the first place? The point is that for the mentality anger is a kind of marker that lets us know when our interests are violated and our needs are not satisfied. Which by its presence helps us to build boundaries and achieve what we need. Anger is the power and energy to change an unpleasant world to suit us and achieve our goals.

But Isagi was shamed for showing negative emotions and for any attempt to express himself. He was shown non-verbally that any expression of self and attempt to argue, even just a different opinion would be received grudgingly, that you had to agree on everything, that if you tried to argue you would be rejected and not only that, you would lose the football.

And Isagi tamps down the anger inside himself - he no longer stands up for himself, and holds back the anger to the last, storing it up inside for years.

He develops a ban on anger.

And in general, not just anger - any negative emotion. He is unable to express even the despair of losing to Kira correctly; he tries to suppress it, to muffle it, the novel explicitly states that he attempts to lock it up inside, but in the end, having overflowed, this despair against his will burst out in a scream. Isagi suppresses all negative feelings in general. Aside from the crying part, this repressed anger is evident even in the first chapter, when he imagines the goalkeeper in tears from defeat, and dreams of crushing Kira. Without saying it out loud, though.

And in that 'against his will' lies the main problem of why exactly anger needs to be lived out properly.

Because otherwise it'll spill out just like that scream - desperate, seething, expansive, and the worst part?

Uncontrollable.

What is the danger of not controlling the expression of anger? Why can't we just hide it inside and keep smiling, without causing anyone problems and without wasting the resources of our body on it, just adjusting? Yes, in doing so you lose your freedom of expression - so what?

Because anger doesn't disappear over time. It is put inside layer by layer, day by day.

And sooner or later you can't hold it back.

In life this rarely ends well: if a person holds themselves to a completely unhealthy level of control they may at some point experience an episode of derealisation - when repressed feelings become so abundant that the brain rolls out one of the strongest self-defence mechanisms - detachment. If it doesn't? One goes off the rails: he overreacts to the smallest of things, he is thrown from one-time hook-ups to drugs and alcohol. The accumulated anger begins to destroy from the insides.

But Isagi, as an adaptation specialist (unconsciously, most likely) has come up with a great answer to this, learnt from childhood and from the show with Noel Noa. Which one? Express anger where it would be considered normal.

Blue Lock with on-field swearing works for Isagi for many reasons at once. He got Bachira, who showed him that there's nothing wrong with expressing his angry-self - he'll be accepted, he would even be welcomed, it's okay to be angry! He got Chigiri and Kunigami, Nanase and Hiori, dozens of people accepting him no matter what (but in personal conflicts outside the field he usually still doesn't know how to behave - he prefers to withdraw and wait for things to resolve themselves - but that's for another time). Here, also, the issue of survival came into play, as expressions of anger and rage were cultivated by the Ego itself, sometimes specifically manipulating the players to do so.

There's also the application of the familiar pattern of his pre-Ichinan childhood ('I play football as rough as Noa - I'm doing well, I'm not alone, and I achieve my goals because it happens on the field, so it doesn't mean anything'), the general tense atmosphere, and a fair number of trigger characters who would drive even a saint to their grave (heh, Kaiser, heh). Isagi in general has more to do with football than almost all of Blue Lock's characters. Manifestations of anger and determination as a child (on the football field!)? Noa. Manifestations of them now? Blue Lock. He continues to use mechanisms familiar from childhood to protect himself, adapting them to new realities.

(basically, even the fact that Noa is around - who, again, once gave little Isagi the opportunity to express himself openly on the field - can have an impact on the escalation of Isagi's behaviour around Kaiser and Bastards. Whose presence and support is associated with a safe expression of himself)

like father like son

And uncontrollable anger bursts out, but for now like water from a cracked jug - in jolts, strong and those impossible to shut down, but from just one place. The swearing at the match and the opportunity to openly express himself and his objectives (remember how he shouted at Noa that his system doesn't allow him to score goals hahaha) allowed him to relax, to partially release the anger accumulated over the years - all without any realisation on his part. He doesn't even have to do anything - it all resolved itself. He's not being rejected, he's playing the way he wants to play and yet he's angry! That's great!

And everything seems to be fine, right?

The problem is that Blue Lock's setting just isn't going to work in the long run. Ego will be there for the rest of the project - another 2-3 months - and for training for the World Championship, for the Championship itself, and... that's it. The project ends, Isagi flies off to play in another country, but who can guarantee that the environment for such an expression of anger will be replicated there as well?

At one point, access to the field and, in principle, to the competitive and encouraging environment for such expressions of character in Blue Lock is bound to be cut off. There are gaps between seasons, injuries, end of career, and the simple fact that such expression depends on how much the coach allows to players - at some point Isagi may well be silenced.

And then all the accumulated, bubbling anger inside, which is now used to being expressed regularly, will spill out - and not on the safe field, where much can be blamed on adrenaline, but on his loved ones, his career and himself.

#gosh I'm so happy that I've started the blog #I can't show everything I want in terms of character analysis in my fics #and now I can do it here and it's so refreshing #blue lock analysis #bllk analysis #bllk #blue lock #isagi yoichi

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grandlinedreams · 6 months

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Hello there! If I could make a request please. Femme reader joins the Heart Pirates while after running away from home. Her parents force fed her a devil fruit and abused her well before then. Law knows this, but didn't know which island she was from. Maybe the crew shores up on reader's home island and she doesn't realize it until they surface? It's readers turn to go on land and leave the ship for a bit and she runs into her family and all hell breaks loose. Law comes to her rescue maybe? Can be like a new relationship or maybe they've been flirting but nothing official yet?

You're writings are amazing! Thank you!

Hiya papaya!! I absolutely can, I have an oc i made for OP that's got a little bit of a similar backstory so i incorporated a little bit of that but I hope I can do this justice for you!!

[Heads up! PLEASE READ TAGS: established relationship, fem!reader, unhealthy family dynamic/mentions of abuse and abuse related injuries, healthy dose of angst, mention of anxiety/panic attack, hurt/comfort]

You don't want to be here.

Pressed to the railing of the Polar Tang's deck, you stare at the island that grows ever closer, jaw taut as the excitement you'd felt this morning completely drain from your system.

You'd been all for getting to be on solid ground, eager to explore a new place ㅡ only to realize that your destination is familiar. Too familiar.

You want to leave. You want to beg Law to find another island to make a supply run on ㅡ anywhere but here. But you know that will lead to questions, ones you don't want to answer.

"Excited to be on land?" Hakugan means well with his question, you know he does, but it still makes you tense.

"Something like that," you answer, hoping nobody noticed that your grip on the railing has bled your knuckles white with the force. Your heart hammers, blood icy in your veins. Maybe it won't be like before, you try telling yourself. Maybe it'll be different.

All you can do is desperately hope that you won't have to be here for long as you approach the island you once called home.

ㅡ

Something is wrong.

Law is far from an idiot or unobservant ㅡ though you try to hide it under your usual cheer, he's aware that your smile is forced, and you try to hide the way you flinch at every sudden noise, every unexpected movement.

"What's wrong." He phrases it more as a demand than a question, watching your expression shift to one of faux-confusion. "Don't try to lie to me," he presses. "You've been acting off since we left the ship."

Damn this man. Damn him for knowing you as he does as of late, afforded the soft vulnerability that comes with being in a relationship, even if new and tentative.

You waffle for a moment, still debating the pros and cons of trying to lie to him ㅡ but it's far from worth it when you know he'll be able to see through it.

"[Name]." The press of your name is intentional, and you last all of two seconds before the dam breaks.

"I'm from this island," you blurt, hate how disgusting it makes you feel to admit connection to this place. For all the idyllic scenery and cheerful townsfolk, you know better. The eyes averted at the bruises on your skin, the carefully deaf ears to the way you were talked to.

They knew, of course. How could they not? It was never like they made it a secret. Especially not after that ㅡ and they'd made it seem like it was your fault. How scandalous, a child eating a devil fruit ㅡ of course you deserved your punishment.

Law stares. You'd mentioned little pieces of your past, prompted by the mandatory physical required of all of his crew, the discovery of scars and bones with clear evidence of breaks long healed.

"You should have said something," Law says, hating the way you flinch, shrinking in on yourself. "We would have found a different island."

"I didn't want to cause problems." Your answer is mumbled, eyes averted. You listen to the approach of footsteps, the weight of a hand on your head.

"We'll make this quick, then get out of here."

You nod, some of the raw pit of anxiety soothed by both Law's touch and his words jefore you take a step forward. "I'll grab some of the dry store supplies we need, I know where to go."

A protest is on the tip of Law's tongue that no, you shouldn't have to go anywhere alone on this island ㅡ but he keeps quiet, abruptly understanding that you're trying to feel as normal as you can.

"Alright," he relents. "I'll grab the other few things. Meet back here, then we'll head back."

You nod. Though your skin still crawls at the very fact you're standing on ground you once did so long ago, you push it down in favor of focusing on the task at hand. The sooner the two of you finish, the better.

ㅡ

You're gathering the last of the supplies when things fall apart. Back to the door of the store, you don't see them walk in ㅡ but the voice that calls to you is horrifyingly familiar, cutting through the air like a knife to sink square into your back.

"Long time no see, [Name]."

You suppose you should have known the tentative peace you've found wouldn't last long enough. After all even with the anonymity the passage of time has afforded you, someone was bound to recognize you. You stiffen, fighting the urge to turn. Maybe if you pretend you don't know them, you can leave.

"Thank-you," you mumble as you're handed the brown paper bag, handing over money before you turn, aiming to walk past them as quickly as you can.

Cold fingers snag around your upper arm, yanking you to a halt. "Is that any way to treat a parent?"

Hot anger ignites in your stomach, indignation that they have the audacity to call themself a parent ㅡ but that flicker of righteous fury is snuffed out when you look up. They smirk, and suddenly you're a child again.

"You're to address me the way you should." Their grip tightens, and you fight not to wince at the protest of your arm beneath their grip. They'd broken this arm before ㅡ and it's clear they can do it again, if they so choose. "Am I clear?"

How many times have you imagined spitting in their face over the years? Fighting back the way you always wished you could, proving you're not a scared child anymore ㅡ only to be reduced to it again. You can't even call on your powers, rooted to the spot as their fingers undoubedly bruise your skin.

"I want an answer," they tell you sharply, and you wince as their nails bite into your flesh as well. "Now."

Bile rises in your throat, burning as your heart hammers with sheer panic, breathing shallow. You hate them. You don't want to go back to this, you were promised you'd never have to, and what good is a promise if it's broken?

Years of progress seems to vanish in an instant as your lips part. "Y—"

"Excuse me."

Nevermore have you been so grateful to hear Law's voice. It's cold, sharp with quiet fury — and when you glance over, Law is glaring at your parent. "Let go of her."

Your parent scoffs, and you fight not to drop the bag in your hold on the floor. "Why should I? She's my daughter—"

"Not anymore." Law's tone is flat and fierce, anger blazing in his eyes as he steps forward. He knows it's not a great idea, but he's not above liberating their hand from their body if they're not going to let go of you. "You don't deserve that title if this is how you treat your own child. Don't make me repeat myself." His eyes flash, the promise of a threat in his words. "Let go of her."

For a moment, you think that they won't. That they're going to make this escalate into something bigger than it needs to be, that you'll be stuck here again, unable to protect yourself ㅡ and then their grip eases just enough that you can wrench yourself free and move towards Law.

You know that they didn't let you go because of him, only to save face and not cause a scene ㅡ but you'll take it, even though you're tempted to turn and offer them a taste of their own medicine with your power.

But where would you be then? No better than them and something they'd always called you, even though they'd been the one to make you into it — a monster.

ㅡ

You're not sure how you get back to the Polar Tang. Whether you walk or Law uses his ability — you can't focus on anything but the lingering panic still thrumming in your veins, rising to a ringing crescendo in your ears.

They talked to you. They touched you.

Law finds you hunched over the bathroom sink, a rag in your grip as you scrub at your upper arm. "Off," you mumble as he approaches, "need to get them off of me."

You've scrubbed your skin red and raw, but it isn't enough ㅡ and you flinch when he curls his fingers around your wrist. "Stop," he says softly, keeps his voice low. "That's enough."

You're taut like a wire under his touch, frozen before you ease up, letting him coax the rag from your hand. You let him guide you from the bathroom to his room, coaxing you to sit on the bed.

"Breathe," Law instructs, hand against your back, rubbing gently. "In and out, slowly."

It takes several long minutes to match your breathing to Law's example, the abrupt sag of your shoulders as tension starts to bleed from your body. You're tired.

You don't protest as he coaxes you into laying down, the soft slip of blankets over you as exhaustion weighs your limbs down. "Law?"

"Hm?" Law hums, lets you reach for him on your own terms, tangle yourself into him before he settles an arm over you, fingers splayed against your back.

"I'm sorry."

Your apology makes Law tense. The last thing that you need to do is apologize — and it invokes leftover anger. Not at you, but at your past, what you'd endured before.

"Shh." Law kisses your forehead, lets his lips stay pressed to your skin as he speaks. "You have nothing to apologize for. Now sleep."

It doesn't take long for you fall asleep, and the peace of your face makes Law's chest ache. You deserve this kind of peace, this kind of safety.

And he plans to give it to you, for as long as he can.

#ㅡmine.#one piece scenario #one piece x reader #trafalgar law x reader #law x reader

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darlingofvalyria · 7 months

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❝You don't think I can please you?❞

part 05 | we're really in it now, darling

chapter summary:

[ Everything comes ahead at a hedge maze because. . . hedge maze. ]

[ +18 MDNI ] [ 4,517 ] [ series masterlist ] | best friend's brother!aemond targaryen x f!reader, ft. cregan stark x f!reader, aemond x alys rivers

contains— angst, a lil smutty but no full whorishness, ya'll good - i should really put idiots in love as a tag shouldn't i - nsfw: grinding + some sexy, sexy second base lmao - no kingslayers, no rogues, no betas.

a/n— i hope ya'll forgive me. comment, reblog & like at will, mi luvs, mwa!

You don't really know what you were expecting come Sunday. Once you started to 'ehh' 'hmmm' and 'maybe's your way through random moments with Helaena after the radio silence from Aemond— your best friend put her foot down.

"Fuck him," Helaena grumbled. "You've been going to Sunday dinners before he was even born, you are not backing down now."

You snorted. "That's wildly inaccurate."

"Point still stands. Fuck. Him. You deserve my mother's tiramisu cake. He doesn't get to take that from you." Her eyes widen as if trying to instil her determination into your system via eye contact. "You are not going to let him take that from you."

You nodded. That's at least a point to pro you can stand by. Though she can't cook to save her life— Alicent's words, not yours — the woman sure can bake. It became therapeutic for her, she once said. How measuring ingredients and kneading dough to patiently folding cream after another kept her mind quiet and her hands busy.

"My faith strongly does not advise rage shooting, you know?" Alicent once hummed.

"Did you mean 'range' shooting?"

"Oh?" she nodded absentmindedly, smiling. "Yes, that too."

"That's true," you mused. Tiramisu cake was her mother's specialty. Every Sunday, she has all attendees pack up at least one cake per person and you and Hel usually stave off bites throughout the week until the next Sunday comes. "I deserve some tiramisu cake, gods be damned it."

"Plus, if you come with me, we'll get two cakes to take home instead of one." She wagged her finger. "We count as two separate entities with one fridge, it's our greatest privilege."

"Daeron calls it preferential treatment."

"I am her only daughter, of course I get preferential treatment."

"As you should, bestie."

Even when you've stopped struggling with choosing if you were going or not, your mind is never faraway from thinking about Aemond. You wonder if he's finally gotten back with Alys was a bad train of thought, while an even worse train of thought is how soft his lips were and how he holds your hair to pull you close when his tongue glides across your bottom lip.

You blink, shaken from the thought. Bad. Bad brain. Stop it.

And repeat. At this point, it was safer to think about Alys and Aemond.

According to previous cycles, by this point they'd be at the height of their newly blossomed relationship— all sweet kisses and heated looks, unable to stop touching each other much less act a little bit better when they're trying to leave a group function to fuck their brains out — so you wouldn't be surprised to see come Sunday that he arrives with Alys— both of them tall, gorgeous with just enough undertone of smirky, smarmy tension that would make you want to stab your own eye out — pointedly ignoring you or whatever happened between you and him.

It hurt to think about sure, but what else did you think was going to happen?

That call made a space the size of a puddle that turned into a lake, welled deep with unresolved feelings and untouched topics. More questions than answers, drawing lines both of you were too scared to tug and see.

It's big enough to notice, and both stubborn enough not to anything about it.

You tried. Well, you almost did. In the weird hours of the day when your brain and body are more physically disjointed so rationality gives way to adrenaline. Most of the time, this is during working hours. You, checking your phone, running around his profile with your thumb a few times, biting your lip as your mind blanks and your body fights to call him. Or leave a message.

Before your mind and body reconnects and you fling your phone as far away from you as possible.

It's weird. You've never fought with Aemond before. If this was considered fighting. You've been disappointed in him, gotten angry and annoyed with him, but someone always, always offers an olive branch.

Every time you think about that call, you close up, your annoyance flares, and you shove your phone away.

In your amicable defense, this was primarily his problem. You weren't truly dating. He made it clear every choice he was making was en toward the agreed conditions were of making his ex jealous enough to take him back, yada yada yada.

Even if, possibly, you wanted more, he made no actual steps to make it known that he was considering it too.

Funny stares on your lips don't count. The only sabbatical from sexual adventures Aemond got were the breakup round with Alys, and as established before, they got it on pretty frequently.

Another thought bubble about Aemond's lips pops in your head, the mint from his toothpaste and the coffee from his black with no sugar, no milk, the way he seemed to suckle on your sighs—

Gods. Damn. It.

Focus.

That last call?

You're a grown ass woman. You're allowed to do whatever you want with whomever you want, and you're not going to make Aemond Targaryen's steely silence of what— disappointment? Of your choices? Of your choice in Cregan Stark and Cregan Stark Jr? Of what you were doing? Sure he was faithful to the Seven, a good old religious boy raised by his momma, but it doesn't make him a saint. Just because he's clinging to the vestiges of first love thinking it could very well be his last doesn't make him holy, or warrant enough to judge you for getting your little you some good dick.

Life is hard. Good dick is hard to come by!

So. Yeah. Days leading up to Sunday was radio silence and way too many thoughts circling your head like vultures, eating away at logic and rationality, and stubbornly still, you refused to make contact. If it's not out of pride, it's out of hurt.

Because he could apologise, but Aemond wasn't known for his apologies.

But then you remembered the flowers, the tulips, and now you just felt sad. Moping, getting annoyed, and trying to get through work without breaking your phone speeds the week in a blur.

Come Sunday afternoon, Helaena was coming to pick you up from her shift at the vet— the beauty of having a vet bff is the Russian roulette of pictures; you never know if you're about to get cuddly new patients with big, sad eyes and pouty snouts or her newest c-section win without any attempts of a blur — so you could get to her mother's house together, you decided to go for the nines with your outfit.

A sweet summer dress later, some gold gladiator sandals half off from your favourite but largely can't afford shoe boutique that you swear you were always going to wear to make up for the insane price (thank the gods Alicent didn't have a no shoe policy because it takes fifteen minutes to get them on and you cannot be on the floor, on her house, with Aemond around, rolling around like a hot potato on the entry way trying to get a fucking shoe on), dusted and prepped in you're fancier version of makeup, and was just finishing off your hair— using the good mousse whilst blaring Disney epics — when knocking came.

You freeze.

On one hand, it could just be Helaena, forgetting her keys again somewhere as she had done so numerous times before, but there hadn't been a slew of expletives or her impression of a cool, clinical voice saying, ''Tis I, the Stranger, have come for thee soul! Open up I gotta pee, woman!' so you got a pretty good guess on the alternative, sending your heart into a stutter and get smacked with a well deep of yearning.

You miss Aemond. You miss hanging out with him, even just having him on video call whilst you prepped a late dinner and he's working out his thesis defense, too late for either of you, but catching another's eye in the tiny phone and sharing a comforted grin. You miss being called my lady in a language that means so much to him, miss bumping shoulders and smelling his crisp scent of cologne and laundry.

Miss his lips, his very soft, very delicious lips—

"Gods damnit, woman, keep it together," you murmur to yourself. Another series of knocks, ever patient, and you're moved by body not mind as breathless giddiness yanks the door open—

Only to fall flat.

"Oh." You can't hide your disappointment at the curly blond with the smirk for centuries. "Aegon. I didn't know it was you."

"Yes, the expressive disappointment in your eyes could bring a man on the edge to his downfall, I must say," he jokes hoarsely, a little hurt. "Not even a hi Aeg. I've missed you Aeg, or— hey Aeg! You look good enough to eat!"

It's Aegon. Not Aemond. Or Helaena. Helaena and Aemond's older brother, Aegon. Party rocking, cocaine hiding, sweat and someone's lipstick smelling Aegon. You like him despite his whorishness because he's funny, because he's sweet when he wants to be, and he always, always gets you a funny mug when he comes back from wherever he came from.

You blink a couple of times, laughing awkwardly as you give him a quick hug. He still smells the same, with the lightest tint of sun in him from his days at the beach not so long ago no doubt.

"Sorry, sorry. Hi Aeg, I've missed you Aeg, and yes, you do look good enough to eat, Aeg."

He hugs back tighter, smothering you in the denim jacket he's wearing and the curly edge of his white blond hair. He's got a new piercing and smells of new perfume.

"So do you, princess," he says as you step back and he appraises you appreciatively. "Those shoes can step on me any time."

"I will never."

"You will never," he says chirpily, moving back with a teasing grin. "Let me guess, you were waiting for my uglier version to come by and got too overwhelmed by the majesticness of me."

'"Majesticness isn't even a word." You snort. "And Aemond is not your uglier version, you don't look that alike."

He raises an eyebrow as you blink. Fuck. "Dear me oh my, I meant Helaena, babe. When did Aemond get into the mix?"

You shove his shoulder, huffing as you pick up your keys and bag, forcing him to step back as you lock the apartment, trying to give yourself grace from his burning, teasing stare. "As if Helaena didn't tell you." You finally turn to him, lips pursed at his faux innocent pout. "Helaena tells you everything."

"She might have mentioned a thing or two about a thing or two." He bumps your hip as you both get into the elevator. "Imagine my surprise when Lae-lae tells me of a wondrous development between her two favourite people that involved a breakup, some gift-giving shenanigans, and kissing." He gasps dramatically as you groaned. "I leave for what— a month or two and suddenly you and Aemond are making out? Babe, I must say, you're doing the tongue tango with the wrong brother."

"He's not the wrong brother, also the tongue tango? Really?" you snap suddenly. The wrong brother comments always irk you because you understand that it's a sensitive issue to Aemond, as well as Aegon himself.

But it's a bait you realise too late because Aegon Targaryen enjoys hauling truths from people in steps and tricks, uncaring if he takes a stab or two to get there as you meet his gaze against the reflective wall, positively smirking.

"Really now?"

"Why are you even picking me up? I thought you were in Oldtown."

"Already sorted. Hel wanted to make sure you get there in time, she's going to be late... After all your earlier ride backed out didn't he?"

Your mouth pursed, annoyance prickling at your edges as the elevator pulled into the lobby. "I don't want to talk about it, where's your car?"

He whistles, languid and all the time in the world on his shoulders with just the hint of smug. "It's a thirty minute ride, babe, you're going to spill."

You shoot him a withering glare. "Not if I have say in it." For emphasis, you yank his door and slam it. Fuck his new Maserati.

"Mature!"

Thirty minutes is more than ample time for Aegon Targaryen to weed his way into your brain like the worst case of earworm (like a stupid ass commercial jingle that just. Won't. Stop) that by the time you reach his mother's, you were ranting.

"—like I get it, saying I'm going out with another guy to get some good dick after confirming that we're going to your mother's for Sunday as a date is bad, but we're not really dating! He said so himself! He pressed the issue of it not being a real thing! And he didn't attempt any—"

"— any communication at all," Aegon echoes, stretching his legs as he stood. "Not a sorry or anything."

"Anything!" you bolster, slamming his door again that is less about him and more about the aggressiveness. "I know that he's bad at apologising, or facing things that are hard, choosing to stew in it and act all shitty to people, I just... I thought he'd at least tell me. Doesn't that warrant our friendship?"

"Hm. Ever think that's precisely why he struggles with you?"

"What does that even mean?"

"That he cares about you, so he struggles more with expressing himself."

You turn to him, cocking your head. "When did you get so wise, oh Gandalf?"

"A Seven focused rehab facility can do that to you," he muses wistfully. "There was this nun that says verses when she orgasms."

You make a face. "Love the fun fact."

"You're welcome. But back to point, isn't the issue also the fact that you never tried to make contact with him either?"

"Well. Yeah. Because..."

Aegon squints at you sympathetically. "Because you're scared of rocking the boat because of how much you like him?"

"Not, well," you hesitate. "Not like that precisely..."

"How much you're capable of liking him?" Aegon smiles wryly. "You had a crush on him, I remembered that at least. When Hel first introduced you to him, you couldn't stop teasing him until he lit up like a Christmas tree. I knew you liked him since then. You called him pretty half the time, and I started to realise it was less about his reaction but how you actually see him, and speaking as the naturally cherub, pretty boy of the family, I find this highly, highly offensive."

You pinch his cheeks, wounding your arm over his shoulder. Aegon was built like a linebacker with less muscles that aren't postern, with wide shoulders and a strong body that's too easy to lean against.

"You're pretty too, Aeg," you coo. "But he's just..."

"If you say ethereal, I will vomit right in my mother's petunias." He makes a face. "How about this. The problem is that you think Aemond doesn't like you back."

You frown at him. "I know Aemond doesn't like me back."

"Oh, sweetie," Aegon coos, sympathy and pity swirling in his smug, smug smile. "I'm so glad you're pretty."

You pinch his sides until he squirms. "Fuck you, what the hell?"

"What I'm saying is, let's test that, you know? Because that's the only variable you aren't sure with?"

You sigh. "Aeg, even if he does, I'm not going to pounce—"

The door swings open, and there he is, of pretty boy face and good boy posture because his mother raised herself a good, devout boy who doesn't know what a slouch is because he's not an ape— and is he wearing his leather jacket? Of course he's wearing the leather jacket and you know that smell, that spiced cologne with the leather and his natural scent and fuck, Aemond is looking at you, looking at his brother, and the open expression, the shock, that smidge of relief— shutters to an icy politeness.

Aegon because he's Aegon, pulls you closer, his mouth curling into a grin that only says trouble, forcing Aemond to straighten up his already perfect posture in preparation for whatever his brother has in mind and his stare is white-hot on the conjoined appendages between you and his brother— and Aegon lands a wet, smacking kiss on your cheekbone.

"Had to pick up your girl, baby bro, I mean what kind of—" his blue gaze finds his mother descending the stairs, peering out to see on who it was, and you're frozen, waiting for the bomb to drop and simultaneously unprepared for it, "— boyfriend has his brother pick up his girl? Good thing you got a good excuse, huh? Oh, hey mother dearest! Your favourite son has come back!"

As Aegon leaves your side with a cheeky little wink, you bit your lip at the frosty look on his face that makes you feel like an absolute idiot and fills you with rage all in one go. Because Aemond has never looked at you like that, like you were at fault and acting like a child, but that you also want to jut a finger against his chest.

"Did you have a nice talk with him on the drive over?" he says, jaw hard.

"I didn't tell him," you hiss, taking the hem of his leather jacket instead of his hands enough so you can pretend to kiss his cheeks because his mother is right there, eyes wide at that two of you as Aegon gave you a discreet thumbs up.

"Helaena did. Get over yourself, your mother's—"

"Aemond?"

As he freezes and Alicent calls your name, you plaster the best smile you can make as you twine your fingertips with his.

"Smile."

"Hm."

When you leave his side to greet Alicent, you make sure to stomp on his stupid shoes.

As soon as you've finished your mandatory greetings— even with Otto Hightower, Aemond's grandfather, who merely raised his eyebrows at the apparent new status of you and his grandson, Alicent having to blink multiple times, wrangling positives as she kept shooting her son looks while he stood like a block of ice behind you — Aemond takes your hand by his own volition, tangles your fingers too tight, and starts tugging you along like a bouy.

"Are you a child?" you hiss, trying to pry your hand as insistently without outright yanking, Alicent already sending you both concerned looks at a news that she called 'oh, that is wonderful!'

"I am younger than you," he murmurs back, holding you tight.

"Oh, fuck you."

With a defeated huff, you take longer, heavier strides and stomps so you're the one dragging him.

It's all illusion of control built on pettiness because you're still being navigated, it's more just pride at this point, but you don't care, and when he scoffs right back, you felt at least a pinch of a win.

And then he, of course, matches your strides so fucking easily.

"Freaking horse-legged motherfucker," you mumble. You don't know if he catches it, or you're imaging the soft, surprised noise that's both a snort and a laugh.

He winds you around the hallway, an unbreakable trajectory to the backyard, dragging you past an easy eye view from the dramatic, floor to ceiling windows and trespassing straight into the hedge maze because of course they had one of those.

"Really? Here?"

"Do you want to be ogled up by my mother?" he says in a nauseatingly chipper voice. "Is that what you and Aegon are planning with all this, hm?"

You twist out of his grip, walking deeper on your own until your eyes are swallowed by the darkness. When you turn to him, your eyes adjust, only seeing the silver of his hair, so different from his black leather jacket and dark green jumper. You don't see his expression or his sharp gaze.

"Planned this? Seriously? Nothing since coming here had been planned, Aemond," your voice has bite and if your eyes had adjusted faster, or if you could see better, you would see the flinch he makes, "if it had been, this certainly would be the last of my fucking choices. Or do I have to remind you of the fact that we were supposed to go together? Oh right, things change when you drop a call out of fucking nowhere!"

"I—fuck." He moves around, a hand through his hair as exhales in frustration. "I didn't... think you'd want to go with me. That Sunday plans had been cancelled."

"And you didn't think to message? I mean it's not like we're friends in literally every social media." You try not to sound hurt before taking a deep breath, offering your palms up. "I didn't—don't even know what the issue is, Aemond. Were you so offended that I was sexually active that you just had to rudely drop the call and not talk—"

It's maybe the darkness, or intuition but you can bet half yours savings that Aemond Targaryen is blushing.

"It... gods, no it's not... I wasn't offended that you were sexually active," he says softly, evenly. He clears his throat. "I don't... mind that you're... sexually active. I actively... support it. Even." He coughs. Swallows. Curses.

If you don't feel like your heart is pounding in your throat you would have laughed. You had never seen the boy this flustered before that it's affecting his words, because Aemond has always been the most well spoken person you know.

"Is it about Cregan? Do you have something against Cregan?"

His eye flutter close. "No... and yes."

"I don't understand, Aemy," you whisper, defeated.

He sighs. In the dark, you notice a movement. His hands flex. It's a habit he's had since you've known him. It's instinct. The way you reach out, finding a piece of his leather jacket until you find your way to his hands, running your fingers over the bones and ridges, his sinew and skin. There are callouses from his fencing, running your thumb over his knuckles.

He's frozen first before he sighs, melting through the warmth you share with him.

"I have nothing against Stark," he finally says. "It's the fact that you were still having sex with him that I found unfair." He steps closer until you can see his face better, the struggle in him can be told through the furrow in his brows and the press of his pillowy lips, red and wet as if he had bitten through it. "I... understand that we're not really together, but I couldn't... not feel as if it wasn't right. As if I wanted it to be me."

His hands finds your arms, eye closing and gently placing his forehead against your own. At first you panic, your body trying to make your brain decide do you like this or not but it's Aemond, and he's warm, gentle, sweet almost. It's familiar and new at the same time. It's warmth you recognise, skin you will know anywhere, but in a way that you've never felt him before.

You close your eyes and breathe with him.

You know that this is rare. That this Aemond is reserved for people he loves and cares about, but with his forehead against yours, with his hands holding you steady, rubbing a comforting thumb over your skin that felt just as for him as it was for you, breathing you in and exhaling you out. A single breath between two bodies.

"I don't know if I can agree to that, Aemy."

"What?" He pulls back, hurt pulling taunt your favourite pair of lips. "Do you like Cregan more? You don't think I can please you?"

"That's not—"

His hands closes on your face, cupping it in his palms as you stare, wide-eyed at the blue fire lit up in his eye. His breath brushes your lips, making them tingle.

"Push me away if you don't want it," he says before his eye closes and he takes your mouth against his own, swallowing your gasp then pulling you away again, eye glinting.

"Push me away, ñuha riña." His voice is so soft, words crisp while your body thrummed in a single, frantic heartbeat. When you don't move, too shock, thoughts tangled, he smirks.

With his teeth, he captures your bottom lip, grazing it. When he feels you shudder, eyes fluttering, he chuckles meanly.

"Push me away as if you don't want me." He tilts your chin up as he looks down on you, eye confident in its lust. His thumb brushes your bottom lip. "As if you don't feel everything I do."

"Fuck you," you manage to exhale as you grab the back of his head and devour him just as you did at the restaurant. He groans, using his other hand to feel your side, pass your one breast, giving it a firm squeeze that makes you gasp, tongue clashing, legs tangling as you push and push and he pulls you to him, his back hitting the prickly hedge. It's teeth and tongue, breaths twisted in one air as you used each other like lifelines, like enemies in a swords match.

It's feverish and passion, infuriating want that gives. Because when you dominate the kiss, tangling his tongue with your own, yanking him down and down as if you want him to reach every part of you inside, he bends and follows. And when he pulls you, tangles your hair and takes every gasp and breath, you surrender.

He groans when you suck on his bottom lip, pulling away just enough to spit out, "You taste so much better than my dreams." His mouth moves down and down, leaving a path of heat as he suckles at your neck, practically ripping the buttons of the top of your dress as he slides down and grunts in pain.

"A-Aemy?" Your eyes flutter. "Your back, shit—"

"Fuck that." He tugs you down until you land with an oomph! on his lap, your chest at his eye level before he drags them back to your gaze. "Tell me to stop."

You shake your head, tangling your fingers in his hair. "No."

"Good."

Your back arches, supported in his hold, as he starts sucking the skin lower and lower, another hand massaging your tit that pools hot down your core until his hand, warm and solid, sinew and bone, and Aemond Aemond Aemond, slides between your bra and cups your breast and his hand is so big, and it feels so good that you start grinding on the hard length you feel right at your—

An ear-splitting shriek freezes the both of you. You and Aemond pull back, hand still on your tit.

"Wha—"

"Ew, ew, ew! Mom said you were fighting! FIGHTING DOES NOT EQUATE FUCKING IN THE MAZE, YOU FUCKING CLICHES!"

TAGGED: @snowprincesa1 @gemini-mama @fan-goddess @snh96 @valeskafics @opheliaas-stuff @tempo-rary-fix @fantasticpeaceharmony @diannnnsss @iamavailablesstuff @spinachtz @at-a-rax-ia @bespinnn @tsujifreya @moonlightfoxx @kemillyfreitas @joyouart @bananzaa @honey-on-mars @alexa4040 @cinnamonbambii @wintrr13 @wxb-slingrr @astroswift @queenofshinigamis @helaenaluvr @kaetastic @jxdegodfrey @laniii-on-your-left @watercolorskyy @microwaveallthedemons @kazuyatokue @herfantastyworldd @averyyreads @urmomsgirlfriend1 @bellstwd @jiminie-08 @ttkttt @nockerin @backyardfolklore @random-ocity @hc-geralt-23 @vendettasblog @cicaspair418 @malynn @anehkael @schadenfreude-and-sarcasm

#aemond targaryen #aemond targaryen x reader #ewan mitchell #aemond fanfiction #aemond targaryen x you #aemond targaryen fanfiction #aemond angst #aemond x reader #hotd angst #aemond x you #hotd fanfiction #elle writes !! ꒱ ↷˗ˏˋ🍒#tshbft ༊*·˚ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ

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blackopals-world · 1 year

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Room to Grow

Pregnant Gardener!FemYuu x Vil Schoenheit

Vil's been watching her like a hawk since the announcement. No gardening until the baby is born. Unfortunately, his wife was ornery as always.

Note: They're married? I know, I'm surprised too.

"They're doing it wrong," Yuu grumbled as she stared out the window.

"I'll be fine." Vil reassured her while drinking his morning shake.

"They are trimming too much." Yuu griped.

"They are trained professionals, Liebling." Vil said again. They had been doing this for months and only have a few left.

She hated people going into her garden but it was a part of the compromise when she got pregnant. She wasn't allowed to come in contact with dirt because Vil was too worried about her and the baby's health. Her immune system was lowered after all.

But people have been having babies since before germ theory and they were fine. Hell her own grandmother had a baby out in the field, swaddled it, and continued with the harvest. Her mother gave birth to her in the morning and by noon she was back to tilling.

Vil wasn't impressed. He asked her to take this seriously and not try to waddle off as soon as the baby gets here.

Yuu felt he was only doing this because of all the pregnancy books he's read. It's nature, not rocket science.

People wonder how they ended up together when they disagreed on almost everything. The truth was they fell in love because they both learned to compromise. They were both extremely but when they meet in the middle their lives are better.

"Can't I just tell them not to trim the marigolds yet, or to keep the leftover roots for the compose?" Yuu whined as Vil pulled her to sit down on the couch.

"Nope, because that'll turn into you showing them how to do it. I'll tell them." Vil pushed her to lay back and rest her feet.

"But, Mo ghrá!" She weakly protested.

"You should focus on staying calm and resting. Your health is our baby's health. Can't garden on swollen ankles." Vil had hoped that his wife's stubbornness would lose against how tired she'd get as she grew. But that wouldn't be his wife and the woman he loved. If anything she was more active, to the point she scared him. All her pint-up energy from lack of gardening was driving her nuts.

"Mo ghrá, I can't just sit around all da-AAAYY!" Her voice shot up as a well-placed kick from her belly made her jump.

"You should listen, even they agree," Vil said placing a hand on her swollen stomach. "That's my little Schnucki. You agree with daddy, don't you?

There was another kick as the baby felt the light pressure of Vil's hand. Vil smiled widely as he kissed his pouting wife.

"Is this what I have to look forward too. They haven't even been born yet and they are already choosing your side." Yuu groaned and pulled Vil's hand to wrap around her. If she was stuck here she demanded comfort in her reluctantly fragile condition.

"If it matters that much then let's have another and we'll ask their opinion."He said smugly.

"Coming from the guy who was scared the moment I brought up having one child. You sure are eager. Well have this one then we'll see if you like it." Yuu hardly believed what she was hearing. Vil has changed.

"It couldn't hurt to consider but it's whatever you want, Liebling."

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland yuu #twisted wonderland x reader #twst yuu #vil schoenheit #twisted wonderland vil #twst vil #vil shoenheit x reader #gardener!yuu

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teatreeoilll · 4 months

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Pot Luck (Toji Fushiguro X Reader)

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w/c - 0.6k content warnings - MDNI (for language and mentions of drugs and alcohol). f!reader. A Toji drabble of what I feel the average Toji interaction is like.

˚• . ° . • . ° . • . ° . • . ° . • . ° . • . ° . • . ° . • . ° . • . ° . • . ° . • . ° . • . ° . • .

2006

“Blow on it,” the traffic officer holds a breathalyzer an inch from Toji’s face. Your mouth grows dry as you smell the painstakingly obvious tang of Sake circling the car's interior.

"I'll just come out and say it, officer," he hums, flicking his cigarette butt onto the road, "You're not my type." You jab your elbow into his side, hoping that inflicting some pain might instill a bit of sound judgment into him.

"Blow on it son, I don't have all night." The cop taps his leg on the concrete, shoving the breathalyzer further under Toji's self-satisfied smirk.

As he continues to hold the policemen's gaze, the dark haired man puckers his lips and exhales into the device, which in turn promptly squeaks and buzzes.

"Why don't you get out of the car, boy?"

Toji drives like a maniac; one of his hands barely clinging to the steering wheel while the other clutches a lit cigarette that suffocates the car with a cloud of smoke. He throws quick glances at the rearview mirror, and each time he does so the car swerves, causing the white markings separating the dark highway ahead to seem like mere suggestions.

"I'm gonna need you to hold on to this for me," he leans close to you, his Sake reeking breath caressing the side of your face. His foot's still pushing the gas pedal as he shoves a large hand up your bra, sticking a tiny crumpled bag of white powder to the padding inside.

"Hey - " you struggle to push his drunken hand aside, an aggressive red hue growing on your face at the warmth of his hand pressing up against your breast, "Focus on the road, asshole."

Red and blue lights emerge on the road behind you, accompanied by ear-splitting sirens and a streak of cusses coming from the driver's seat. "Just for a minute, yeah baby?" He jerks the wheel, causing the car to wobble as it grazes the shoulders, "We'll lose him on the next exit."

This is a collect call from Akasaka Police Station; if you would like to accept the call, please say yes. If you would like to -

"Fucking asshole," you breathe.

The system did not recognize your decision; if you would like to accept the call, please say -

"Yes." You huff into the phone as the line plays its connecting melody.

The moment you catch a faint sound of a breath on the other end, the facade of cool composure you've been clinging to shatters; "I'm not bailing you out again, Fushiguro. You can rot in there for all I care."

"Don't worry about that baby; Shiu's got it covered."

A scolding tone creeps into your voice, "You better pay him back this time."

Toji ignores your reproach, letting the words linger before continuing, "Anyway, they revoked my license, so why don't you pick me up and we can - "

"You had a license?"

"Funny, why don't you tell me s'more jokes when you get here, huh?"

"Can't Shiu take you? Or better yet, leave you there?"

"He'll probably leave before he sees me bouncing out of the cell, so fat chance of that happening. You're the only one left, baby."

You weren't sure what kind of supernatural force was steering the wheel while you drove in a daze through the busy streets toward the police station, leaving your mind consumed with organizing the accusations you were itching to hurl at him.

The car dips lightly under his weight as he thumps into the passenger seat, "D'you still have that bag I gave you?"

"Hey to you too, asshole." You sigh, "And no, I didn't keep the cocaine you shoved up my bra."

"Ah, never mind," he lifted an arm to swipe the hair sticking to his forehead, "At least I got to cop a feel."

#toji x reader #toji fushiguro #jjk toji #toji x you #toji fushiguro x reader #fushiguro toji x reader #toji zenin #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jjk X reader #jujutsu kaisen X reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujustu kaisen #toji x y/n #fushiguro x reader #jjk toji x reader

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illuminatedquill · 3 months

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All Mine

A Sabine Wren & Ezra Bridger Story

Story Summary: A mission for the Ghost crew takes an unexpected turn when Ezra Bridger reunites with a childhood crush, Shana Tavorri. Sabine Wren, his close friend and partner, must deal with newfound feelings of jealousy - and possibly more - over their relationship.

For Sabezra Day 2024, @sabezraweek

Prompt: Confessing

Bright Jewel System, Mid-Rim Territories

"Look lively," called Hera from the Ghost's cockpit. "Just picked up the Phantom II signal."

Sabine was sitting with Ezra in the Ghost's communal area, playing a game of dejarik. At Hera's call, Ezra sighed and turned the game off. "Well," he said regretfully, "looks like duty calls, Sabine."

She smirked at him and replied, "Lucky for you that it's calling. I was about to bulldoze all over your pathetic defense there at the end." Sabine knew that she had him on the ropes at the game's end. Much as she respected her friend's prowess in battle, Ezra never was much of a tactician.

But, then again, his powers as Jedi certainly did give him options that weren't available to an average combatant. His strategies tended to fall outside the usual box of combat thinking, as Captain Rex - a veteran of the Clone Wars and no stranger to Jedi tactics - put it mildly one time.

It's probably why we work so well together as a team, Sabine reflected. She was one of the only people who could keep up with whatever crazy plan Ezra developed on the fly.

Ezra scowled at her. "My defense was solid, thank you. I was actually about to achieve victory. You're the one who is lucky."

That elicited a laugh from her. "Whatever makes you feel better, goober."

He opened his mouth to further argue the point but was interrupted as Hera emerged from the cockpit followed closely by Chopper. Sighing at the sight of them bickering, she planted both hands on her hips, her expression exasperated.

"Come on, you two," she said. "Let's be good hosts and greet the guest."

Ezra threw Sabine a 'we'll settle this later' look and followed Hera towards the Ghost's stern where the Phantom II had docked. Sabine replied by cheerfully sticking her tongue out at him, as she fell in step behind.

This 'guest', as Hera put it, was a Rebel spy part of the Fulcrum agent network. Three days ago, the Ghost crew had received a transmission from an unexpected source: Princess Leia Organa, the daughter to Senator Bail Organa. She had asked them to rendezvous in the Bright Jewel System where this spy had requested backup to make a trade with an Imperial informant for a data disk containing crucial information to the Rebellion on the nearby planet of Ord Mantell.

Being familiar with the Ghost crew and their capabilities, Princess Leia had requested them specifically for this mission. Once they arrived in system, Kanan and Zeb had then piloted the Phantom II to secret coordinates in deep space to transport the Rebel spy onto the Ghost from an undisclosed location.

As they approached the Phantom II docking bay, Zeb was the first one to disembark, the hatch hissing open to make way for the Ghost crew member. The big Lasat stretched as he emerged, wincing at the crackling noise his joints made. He greeted everyone and, upon seeing Sabine and Ezra, asked with a big grin, "Who won the dejarik game?"

"Me," said Sabine at the same time as Ezra. They turned to each other with bemused looks as Zeb guffawed at their expressions.

"I'll take that to mean that Sabine was about to win it then," Zeb chuckled.

Ezra pouted. Sabine grinned but gave her partner an affectionate pat on the back.

Hera sighed again. "Kids, please behave," she said.

Kanan's voice drifted out from the open hatch, speaking softly to someone. "Watch your step here," he advised, his hand outstretched to the guest.

The Rebel spy stepped through. She was young, around Sabine's age. Lustrous black hair that fell slightly past her shoulders and a beautiful, statuesque face that belonged in holo-dramas. Her eyes were a light gray that shone with a cool intelligence, taking in the Ghost crew with a swift look. The white combat suit she wore was Rebellion standard uniform but, somehow, looked perfectly tailored to her slender body. The holster on her belt had a mean looking blaster tucked inside and judging from the marks on the weapon, it had seen use plenty of times.

Beside her, Sabine heard Ezra take a deep breath in surprise. Frowning, she looked to him - and noted the look of dumbstruck recognition flashing in his piercing blue eyes.

Before she could ask him what was up, Kanan introduced the spy to the crew. "Everyone, this is the Fulcrum agent we've been assigned to escort. Her name is Shana Tavorri."

She nodded in greeting. "Hello, everyone. Pleased to meet you all. I'm grateful for the assistance in this mission. Princess Leia has given you the highest of recommendations."

Shana smiled as her gaze fell upon Ezra. "Especially you, Ezra Bridger."

Sabine narrowed her eyes at Shana. There was an intimate familiarity with how she said Ezra's name . . . and, for some reason, it bothered her.

Ezra took a cautious step forward. "It really is you," he said in amazement. "I can't believe it."

Sabine crossed her arms and leaned against the bulkhead. There was an odd, pinched feeling emanating somewhere inside her chest. Grimacing, she watched her friend practically float towards the new arrival.

Shana's smile widened into an easy-going grin. "Been a while, Ezra. You've certainly grown up from the little street thief I remember back on Lothal."

"You know Ezra?" asked Kanan in surprise.

Shana nodded. "We go way back. Our families were close, and we were childhood friends . . ." Her expression turned sad. "That was before the Empire took over. Ezra - did you ever find out about your parents?"

Ezra went still, a pained expression briefly passing over his face before smoothing into a neutral look. "They died some time ago," he said.

Shana's face fell; she reached out and gripped his hand in sympathy. "Oh, Ezra. I'm so sorry. I was always hoping that they met a better fate than my own family."

Ezra looked down at his feet. "No such luck, I'm afraid," he said. "It's okay. They died helping people."

"It's not okay, Ezra. It'll never be okay. Look - come here," she said and suddenly pulled him into a deep hug. Ezra's face went red in surprise, and he glanced at Sabine with an odd look - like he was caught doing something he wasn't supposed to.

She just frowned at him and felt another uncomfortable twinge in her chest. Sabine rubbed at the spot, wondering why she felt this way looking at Ezra and his old friend embracing - and became aware of Hera, looking directly at her, with an amused look on her face.

I don't like this, Sabine thought. I've got a bad feeling about this.

She coughed loudly, interrupting the tender moment between Ezra and Shana. Stepping forward, she stuck out a hand at the Rebel spy. "I'm Sabine, by the way," she said. "Sabine Wren. Ezra's partner."

Shana released a flustered Ezra from the hug and turned towards Sabine. The Fulcrum agent's gray eyes glinted with amusement as she took in Sabine's blunt manner and colorful appearance.

Shana replied coolly, "I've heard all about you, Sabine Wren. You have quite the reputation." The spy took Sabine's hand and gave it a tight, yet amiable squeeze in acknowledgement. Her grip was firm and steady, Sabine noted; her hands, while looking delicate, were calloused. It meant that Shana was not unaccustomed to hard work, despite her model appearance and elegant demeanor.

Normally, that would have impressed Sabine. But, for some unknown reason, it made her dislike the spy even more.

"Good or bad?" asked Sabine as they shook hands.

Shana gave a polite smile as she responded. "Depends on who you ask."

Hera clapped her hands together. "Right. Well, seems like our guest and Ezra have some catching up to do. Ezra, you'll have the honor of giving Shana the tour. Kanan and Zeb, you can go rest. I'll punch in the coordinates to Ord Mantell and get us on the way. And Sabine . . ."

"Yes, Hera?" She was staring at Shana who had already sidled away to speak with Ezra.

"Go freshen up your room. Shana will bunk with you for the night."

Sabine felt her stomach drop out from her abdomen. "Seriously?" she asked. "She's in my room?"

Hera arched an eyebrow. "Is there a problem?"

Sabine gritted her teeth. "No," she replied. Shana had slipped her arm through Ezra's and was walking with him towards the Ghost's communal area. Ezra said something to her, and the young woman let out a peal of laughter that rang through the corridor.

Sabine felt her heart twist viciously as she watched Ezra give a shy smile at Shana.

"No problem at all," she said and went to clean her room, doing her best to ignore the turbulent feelings buzzing inside that were saying something else entirely.

Hyperspace, Mid-Rim Territories

It had been a long day, despite the relative lack of activities, and Sabine was ready for bed. Ezra had given Shana an in-depth tour of the Ghost at her insistence; at the end of it, Sabine had the amusing thought that their guest now possibly knew the Ghost's interior better than any of them. Once finished, Ezra and Shana had lounged in the Ghost's communal area, chatting about various things that had happened in their lives while they had been apart.

Sabine had spent that time lurking nearby, working at a nearby computer station - or, at least, pretending to be working. She was trying to get a better read on this mysterious Shana Tavorri; a Fulcrum agent, after all, was a notable position within the Rebellion, especially for someone so young. There were many of them, she knew, scattered throughout the galaxy performing various missions of critical importance to the Rebellion. The only other one she knew personally was a Jedi Knight, much like Kanan and Ezra, named Ahsoka Tano.

Shana was clearly no Jedi, but she definitely had exhibited skills that the Rebellion deemed worthy enough to put her in the same position that a Jedi had previously held. That made her dangerous.

But Shana's conversation with Ezra failed to disclose any of those potential skills, despite Sabine's best efforts to listen in. She was, however, embarrassed by her response whenever she did hear her name mentioned by Ezra, which came up more than a handful of times in their discussion; a warm, fuzzy feeling that left her feeling pleased.

After a while, both Ezra and Shana wrapped up their chat with a hug (Sabine felt her jaw clench so hard that she could hear something creaking) and retired to their respective bedrooms for the night. Sabine finished her work at the computer station half an hour later and followed suit.

Checking a nearby chronometer, she registered the lateness of the hour and stepped inside her room, deciding to spend some time maintaining her weapons before sleeping -

Only to find Shana laying in the top bunk, reading something on a data pad. Sabine winced, having forgotten that she wouldn't be alone for the night.

"Don't mind me," said Shana amiably, almost as if reading Sabine's thoughts. "Just pretend I'm not here."

Gladly, Sabine thought. But she said, "Hope I didn't disturb your reading."

Shana chuckled. "You didn't. I was just finishing up, actually." She rolled over in the bed to get a better look at Sabine. Her gray eyes took in Sabine's casual appearance, glittering with an almost feline interest.

Sabine, uncomfortable with her gaze, settled down at her desk and reached for her blasters and maintenance tools. "Anything interesting?"

"Oh, plenty," replied Shana. "I was reading about this superweapon developed by the Empire called 'The Duchess'."

Sabine froze, her hands twitching on the grip of her blaster. Her heart began to hammer away, a thousand beats per second. Slowly, she turned towards Shana, finding her sitting at the bed's edge, her feet dangling. There was a slight, polite smile on her face, but her gray eyes flashed again with that cool intelligence.

"You have led quite the life, Sabine Wren," remarked Shana. "Tragedy after tragedy. Does anyone in this crew know about any of that?" She cocked her head at Sabine. "Does Ezra? What would the gallant Jedi think of his friend if he really knew her?"

It was a thought that had kept Sabine up through the night on several occasions.

She crossed her arms and stared at Shana. "You've been reading up on me."

Shana shrugged. "On everyone, really. Princess Leia recommended you all so highly, so I couldn't help but take a peek at your files and histories. Quite the achievements you've pulled off for a crew so small."

"I've been reading up on you, too," replied Sabine coolly. Shana arched an eyebrow in surprise, eliciting a rush of satisfaction - clearly the spy had not been expecting that. "You ran with Saw Gerrera's crew for five years before working directly under Princess Leia. Did he kick you out, I wonder? What does it mean if you're too extreme even for someone like him?"

Shana dropped down from the top bunk and leaned against the bulkhead; her arms crossed in a similar fashion to Sabine. She wondered briefly if it was intentional, to mimic her. "Those files are available only to the top brass of Rebel Command," she murmured. "You hacked into the Rebellion's encrypted database at that old computer station? I assumed you were just skulking about, trying to listen to mine and Ezra's conversation."

Sabine shrugged, hiding her humiliation at having been clocked so easily by the other girl. And here I was thinking that was discreet, she thought. "I'm clever like that," Sabine retorted.

Shana grinned. "Your reputation precedes you, Sabine. Gifted prowess in combat, especially for a Mandalorian, and notable demolitions expert - but everyone seems to overlook that you are a child prodigy. I suspect your rough, blunt demeanor disguises that fact well. But you are, without a doubt, an enormous threat against anyone that chooses to go against you."

Sabine rocked back mentally at Shana's high praise of her talents. But all she said was, "Thanks, I guess."

Shana nodded in acknowledgment. "I can't say the same for Ezra, however." Shaking her head, she added, "I'm surprised he's survived this long."

"What do you mean?" asked Sabine.

"He's hopeless," said Shana in an exasperated tone. "I mean, yes, he's a Jedi now - or so he claims. I understand they're in short supply of capable students but to recruit him into the fabled Jedi Order? Desperate times, I suppose. He could barely tie his shoelaces together when I left him last."

"Ezra Bridger," said Sabine hotly, "is more than capable in any situation. Not because of his Jedi training, but because of who he is. He's saved all our lives - and many others - countless times over."

Shana eyed her skeptically. "You don't have to pretend to me, Sabine. I was just like you before. He's a loyal pup to be sure and good for a distraction I admit, but it's a stretch to say that he's capable on his own." She sighed. "I understand that this crew needed a mascot, perhaps, to cheer them up during these dark times but I think it's irresponsible to take someone like him - "

Sabine struck her with an open hand so hard that the other girl's head bounced off the bulkhead. Before Shana could recover, she shoved her against the wall, pinning her with a well-placed forearm. Sabine, through the red haze that obscured her vision, dimly noted the cut lip on the girl's face but found that she didn't care.

"Do not insult Ezra Bridger in front of me ever again," she said in a voice that was barely recognizable. It was a harsh rasp that Sabine didn't know she was capable of. "Do you understand?"

Shana tapped on Sabine's arm, gasping for air. It took a few moments for her to realize that the other girl couldn't reply due to the lack of air. Sabine relented, feeling her heartbeat pulsing rhythmically inside her skull; she looked down at her hands and found them shaking from the rush of adrenaline, now subsiding.

Yet on the inside she felt calm, as though a stream of ice water were flowing through her veins. Many things from Shana had unnerved her tonight, but it was her insults toward Ezra that had pushed Sabine past the edge.

Doubled over, wheezing, Shana gave her an amused look to Sabine's surprise. "So, you do care," she said.

"You didn't answer my question," Sabine said quietly.

Shana nodded. "I understand. You've got this emotional wall up, you know that? Hard to see through - except when it comes to Ezra Bridger." She wiped at her lip, noting the blood. "Nice hit," she observed.

Sabine reached into her desk and took out a first-aid kit. "Patch yourself up," she said, offering it to her.

Shana accepted it with a nod of gratitude. "I hope you don't take what I said about Ezra seriously. I just needed to know where you stand with him."

Sabine sat back down at her desk. "You don't actually think that way about him?"

Shana shook her head and leaned back against the wall, opening the kit. "Not at all. I know Ezra. We used to scavenge together back in the old days on Lothal. Hit up Imperial patrols for food and water. He stuck his neck out for me plenty of times, at risk to his life. I know what he can do. And that was before he became a Jedi."

Sabine watched her apply medicinal gel to her lip, thinking over what she said. "You care about him."

Shana blew out a breath. "Deeply. He was the only bright spot in my life during that time. I think I loved him."

Sabine felt her heart stop at Shana's words, hearing the depth and sincerity of emotion within them. Feeling her stare, Shana looked over at her with a knowing gaze. "You know what I mean, don't you?"

Deflecting the question, Sabine asked, "So why did you leave him? How did you two get separated?"

Shana sighed. "One of our little scavenging operations went sideways. An uppity Imperial lieutenant wanted to make an example of us for humiliating him in front of his troops. The chase was exhausting; Ezra led most of them away but the lieutenant caught up to me. I thought I was dead."

She closed her eyes, reliving the memory. "Saw Gerrera was there. Don't ask me why or how; he never explained. He killed the lieutenant and offered me a choice. He was impressed with my skills, you see. So he said that I could come with him and pay back the Empire for what they had done to me."

"And if you didn't?"

The girl smiled grimly at Sabine. "He would kill me. No witnesses. Apparently, he didn't want the Empire knowing about his whereabouts, should they find and interrogate me afterwards."

Sabine snorted. "Not much of a choice."

"Indeed," Shana agreed. "So, I went with him."

"And left Ezra? You never went back for him?" Sabine didn't mean to, but there was an accusatory tone to her questions.

Shana eyes glazed over with sadness. "I couldn't. He was just a kid. I didn't want to pull him into danger. I could tell Saw was dangerous, even if he was fighting for the Rebellion. The moment I had an opportunity to do so, I jumped ship. Princess Leia found me and offered a new path. I took it."

Sabine was silent for a moment, thinking about Shana's story. Finally, she said quietly, "Ezra would have followed, if you had asked. He would have gone with you anywhere."

"I know. He's silly like that."

"Loyal," she corrected. Shana cocked her head and smiled a little sadly at Sabine.

"Just like you are to him. Is it typical Mandalorian stubbornness? Or something more?"

Sabine did not want to have that conversation with Shana. Or with anyone else, for that matter. She stood up abruptly and said, "Good night, Shana."

Shana's smile became, somehow, even more sad. "A word of advice, Sabine?"

Sabine was already standing at the door, about to step out. But something in Shana's tone made her pause.

"Don't wait to tell him how you feel. You won't get a second chance. Especially in this galaxy."

She considered Shana's words for a long moment before replying, "Whatever you think our relationship is . . . it's none of your business. That stays between us."

Sabine left before the other girl could respond. Her mind still buzzing with what happened, she wandered aimlessly through the corridors of the Ghost before running smack dab into someone.

"Sabine? What are you doing?" Sabine blinked at the person speaking - and almost groaned out loud.

It was Ezra. Dressed in his sleep wear, holding a mug of his favorite beverage, hot chocolate. His eyebrows were raised in an expression of concern. "Are you okay?" he asked.

Sabine very desperately wanted to be anywhere else right now. Her face was flushed in embarrassment; her heart was thudding a steady tattoo into her ribs at Ezra's proximity. She felt exposed, like a raw nerve, her inner turmoil and feelings threatening to spill out the longer she stayed in front of him.

Racking her brain to find some last second excuse to get out of there, something caught her attention: Ezra's fingers were bandaged. Her fears momentarily vanished as she asked, "What happened to your hands?"

Ezra fumbled his mug, trying to hide the evidence but it was too late. Sighing, he said, "I was working on something."

Sabine arched an inquisitive eyebrow at him. "Working on what?"

Blushing, Ezra said, "Promise not to laugh?"

A small smile curled on her lips. "Nope."

Ezra groaned but led her to the communal table where his "project" laid. She noted immediately the disarray of colored paper strewn about on the table, half folded in various attempts into a familiar shape -

It clicked. "You're trying to make a flower out of these?" she asked. Ezra sat down and nodded glumly.

"Ezra Bridger," she said, placing a hand on her hip. "You've been holding out on me in terms of artistic abilities? That come with your Jedi training?"

He gave her a despairing glance. "I wish. Been up most of the night trying to figure this out."

Stifling a laugh out of pity, she surveyed his work. "It's not half-bad. What kind of flower are you trying to make?"

Ezra rubbed the back of his head, not looking at her. "It's supposed to be a - well, a Lenora flower."

Sabine's eyes widened in surprise. "A Lenora flower? From the fairytale?" Princess Lenora and the Starboy was an old fairytale that she was familiar with - in fact, it was one of her most treasured stories. Memories of her father reading it to her when she was younger, were still vivid in her mind. The flowers from that fairytale held deep symbolic meaning that marked them as her favorite.

"Yeah."

"I see." Sabine studied Ezra's work some more, looking to see where he went wrong - and then felt her stomach sink, as a horrid thought came to her.

"It's for Shana, isn't it." The words tasted rancid in her mouth.

Ezra looked at her, surprised. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion, then - oddly enough - a small, relieved smile appeared on his face. He answered in an innocent tone, "Sure. It's for Shana."

There was a part of Sabine, operating from a recent frame of memory, that wanted to sweep the contents of the table onto the floor and stomp on them. She struggled to control her wayward feelings, however, and took a deep breath.

"You want some help?"

Ezra's expression turned amused. "You sure?"

Sabine sighed. "Yeah. I'm sure." He needed her help. Like always.

And she could never turn him down.

He patted the seat next to him. "Thanks, Sabine."

Despite the situation, Sabine managed a smile at her friend. "Anytime, goober."

Ord Mantell City, Ord Mantell

Ord Mantell City was a bustling acropolis, teeming with all manner of people far flung from the distant corners of the galaxy. Tall spires loomed over the city center; a sprawling mass of mis-matched architecture that spread far as the eye could see. Rumor had it that the infamous criminal organization, the Black Sun, operated out of here - a rumor that the Empire was desperate to quash, as it clashed with their image of retaining control over the entire known galaxy. Despite being a haven for ill-gotten gains and profit, it was certainly a far cry from the pits of villainy and scum that other planets were, and the citizens enjoyed a relatively peaceful life despite the tense cold war between the Empire and the criminal organizations that inhabited their city.

The Ghost had arrived mid-morning with time to spare before Shana had to make contact with her Imperial informant. After taking the time to do a quick survey of the locals to ensure that they weren't being watched, Shana revealed her plan to the crew: a simple trade made in the market square and then she would be shuttled off in a separate transport nearby with another Fulcrum agent who was waiting on stand-by. The Ghost crew would act as her escort, in case things got hairy.

It was a reasonable enough plan - except for one, glaring flaw that Sabine immediately noticed.

"Why is Ezra the only one going with you for back-up?" she asked, trying to keep the heat out of her voice. "I thought we were all going with you."

Shana shook her head. "My informant would scamper at the sight of a group approaching. Two is more than sufficient to handle him, I assure you. The rest of you will wait back here, in the Ghost, ready to assist should we need it. The market square isn't far from the landing pad."

Sabine looked to Kanan and Hera. "Please tell me you disagree with this," she said.

Kanan stroked his beard, thinking. "Hera?" he asked. "What's your opinion?"

Hera answered, "She knows the area better than we do. And I know Shana and Ezra can handle themselves in a fight." She glanced at Sabine. "It's her plan, Sabine. And we'll be nearby in case something goes wrong."

"Which it won't," Shana said reassuringly. "I know this informant. He won't be a problem."

Sabine glared at her, then turned towards Kanan. "Kanan?"

Kanan let out a deep breath. "I'm with Hera on this one. We'll leave it to those two. This information is important. We don't want to risk spooking her informant."

Zeb grunted in assent. Chopper whomped his agreement, as well.

Sabine gritted her teeth, preparing to launch an argument -

Ezra interjected before she could open her mouth. "Sabine."

She looked at him. He gave her a serious look and said, "It'll be fine. Trust me."

Sabine blew out a frustrated breath. "Fine. Leave your com-links on, though. I want to hear everything being said. The moment something goes wrong, we'll know."

Shana nodded. "Agreed." Turning to Ezra, she said, "Let's be off, Master Jedi."

Ezra bowed gallantly at her and said, "Lead the way, my lady." They began to make their way down the boarding ramp.

Sabine rolled her eyes. Shana paused at the entrance and turned around to face Sabine.

"What?" asked Sabine.

"He'll be safe with me," said Shana. "I promise."

And she left without another word. Sabine watched her catch up to Ezra, turn a corner on the street ahead, and then vanish into the crowd.

An hour later, they returned triumphant with the data disc in hand. Sabine bounded down the ramp, almost colliding into Ezra. She had been pacing inside the Ghost, listening to the tense conversation exchanged between Shana and her Imperial informant, expecting it to go sideways at any given moment - but it never did.

Shana did her job as expected. Ezra checked in a few minutes later to let them know they were on the way back, and that he hadn't spotted - or sensed - anyone following them.

"Huh," said Kanan. "That's a first for us. A job that didn't have any complications."

Hera glanced at Sabine knowingly. "Well, for most of us, anyway," she remarked.

She bit her lip and double-checked her friend for trackers, despite knowing there were none.

Shana said, "I'm fine, too, in case you were wondering."

Sabine threw her a glare and finished her inspection. "No trackers on you, far as I can tell. All clear."

Ezra raised an eyebrow at her. "That was a very . . . thorough inspection on your part, Sabine."

She punched him lightly on the shoulder. "Shut up, goober."

He grinned briefly at her and then turned to Shana. "I guess this is farewell," he said quietly.

The other girl shook her head. "Don't say it like that, Ezra. I'm sure we'll meet again - "

Ezra interrupted her. "Just say it this once. Please. For me."

Shana looked taken aback for a moment and then smiled sadly. "Good-bye, Ezra Bridger."

And then she leaned forward, giving a soft kiss on his cheek. Sabine looked away.

"Good-bye, Shana," he said softly. He turned back towards the Ghost and walked up the ramp without another word. Which left Sabine alone with Shana.

Sabine gazed at her, not sure what to say. Shana, however, merely smiled and offered her hand. Incredulous, Sabine gripped it and gave a firm shake.

"This has been an . . . experience," she said. "I'm still not sure what to make of it."

"Can I tell you something, Sabine? I'm rather jealous of you. Ezra clearly cares for you deeply."

"And what makes you think that?"

"He didn't say good-bye to you when he left with me. He just asked you to trust him; trust that he would come back." Her smile turned melancholy. "I don't think he'll ever say good-bye to you, Sabine Wren."

Shana's com-link sent out a chirping noise. She checked it and said, "That's my ride. I should be going shortly."

"Well, safe travels. And good hunting," replied Sabine. The Fulcrum agent nodded and turned to go - but paused for a split second and turned back towards her.

"Yes?" asked Sabine, cautiously.

"Remember what I said. About not waiting." She looked thoughtful for a moment and then added with a sincere smile, "And take care of him, will you? He's all yours now."

And then she took a few hurried steps and disappeared into the crowded streets of Ord Mantell City.

Hyperspace, The Way Home

Later that night, getting ready for bed, Sabine came across Ezra sitting alone in the Ghost's communal area. He was studying something gripped in his hand, his expression lost in thought.

Sabine took a step closer and felt her eyes widen in recognition: it was the paper Lenora flower that he had made the night prior.

"You still have that?" she asked.

Ezra jolted slightly in his seat. "Oh, hey. Didn't see you there."

"Shana didn't want it?" Sabine asked. She couldn't imagine the girl refusing Ezra's present. Just the thought of it alone made Sabine wish she had hit Shana harder when she had the chance.

Ezra smiled sheepishly and rubbed the back of his head. "Well, it wasn't for Shana in the first place."

He abruptly offered it to her. Sabine felt her jaw drop in surprise.

"It's for me?"

He nodded. "Hera told me that you were feeling a little neglected since I was focused on spending time with Shana, so I decided to make this as thanks. I appreciate you giving us the time and space to catch up."

Sabine took the flower gently from Ezra's hand. "How did you know to make this one? It's my favorite."

Ezra smiled at her. "You might have mentioned it a time or two during a conversation. It's from your favorite fairytale."

She arched an eyebrow at him. "Try that again."

He winced. "Okay, I snuck into your room one time and saw the book laying on your bed. It wasn't for weird reasons, I promise! Zeb ate all my snacks, and I knew you had some stashed away, so I went looking while you were out."

Sabine snorted. "I believe you now." She rolled the flower between her fingertips, admiring the work Ezra had put into it.

All for her.

"You know what this flower symbolizes, Ezra?" she asked suddenly.

He thought about it. "Unwavering loyalty and dedication, right? I can't quite remember the whole story."

And love, she thought.

"Anyway," Ezra said quietly, "I just wanted you to know that . . . well, you're the only one for me, Sabine. No one will ever replace you."

Sabine's eyes snapped to Ezra; she could hear her heartbeat, pulsing loudly in her ears.

"As a partner," he added hastily. "I mean - well, you know - "

She smiled. "I know what you mean, goober."

Don't wait to tell him how you feel. You won't get a second chance. Especially in this galaxy.

He's all mine now, she thought. All mine.

"We should probably head to bed now. Separately. But you knew that." Ezra's expression became increasingly mortified at what was coming out of his mouth. He looked like he wanted to very badly disappear in that second.

Sabine just laughed. "True. It's been a long day."

He shook his head, his expression flustered. "Good night, Sabine. See you in the morning." He began to walk down the hallway towards his room.

Don't wait.

"Hey, Ezra," she called. He turned around.

"Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum," she said softly.

Ezra cocked his head in an inquisitive manner. "Is that a Mandalorian saying?"

Sabine nodded.

"What does it mean?"

"A literal translation is 'I will know you forever.'"

Ezra mulled over the significance of what she said. "Nothing's certain in this galaxy, Sabine," he said. "But I hope that's true for us."

"Me, too," Sabine replied. She followed him down the hallway to their rooms.

"Does that phrase have another meaning?" asked Ezra. "I get the feeling it translates to something else."

I love you.

Sabine smiled at him. "It does have another, more famous meaning. I'll tell you about it someday. When this war is over."

"Ah," said Ezra dryly. "Well, that won't be too much of a wait, then. Between you and me, we've got the Empire on the ropes already."

Sabine laughed.

"Promise me you'll really tell me what the other meaning is?" asked Ezra. "You won't leave me hanging, right?"

Sabine looked at him, gazing deeply into his eyes. How blue they looked, she thought. How they shined like sapphire gems under the right lighting.

"I promise, Ezra Bridger," she said. "No matter what. If the galaxy tries to separate us, I'll find you and tell you."

#sabezra #sabezraday2024 #sabezra fanfiction #sabine wren #ezra bridger #star wars #star wars rebels

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jpitha · 2 months

Text

Between the Black and Gray 17

First / Previous / Next

Nal and Fen stayed strapped into their pod for the better part of an hour before someone opened it up. Being an escape pod, provisions are made for opening from the outside - you never know when the people inside are injured and can't escape themselves. They had unstrapped and were just sitting around waiting to be let out. What else could they do?

Finally, they heard banging on the other side, and with a slight puff of pressure differential, the door opened and a human technician peered inside. Immediately behind here were two heavily armed soldiers in armored pressure suits - but their helmets were open. "Uh, you two all right? Do you need medical attention?"

Fen's eyes flicked to Nals, and she barely twitched one of her ears. The earring jangled just a little bit and Fen figured she meant to play along. "We've been drugged. We're doing better now, but we could probably stand to be checked out by a medical team. Do you have someone familiar with K'laxi physiology?"

The tech turned and looked behind them and gestured to someone Fen couldn't see. Another human, this one in a white medical uniform stepped in. "My name is Doctor Tiems. We can check you both out, I am familiar with K'laxi physiology. What happened?" As she spoke she started to help Nal out of her seat.

"We were aboard that starjumper, Spyglass and as soon as your group of ships linked into the system, we were drugged and placed onto this escape pod and dumped. I saw Spyglass fire her stardrive, and I assume link away, but I didn't see that. Honestly, it was hard to concentrate."

A little reader chirruped when Dr. Tiems pressed it to Fen's neck. She looked at the readout and blanched. "I'll say it was. You were given enough antinausea sedative to knock someone out for a whole day. How are you awake?"

Fen smiled weakly. "I don't know Doc, I guess they don't effect me as much."

Dr Tiems stepped out and offered her hand to Fen. "Come on. Let's get you to medical and get that flushed out. Don't worry about your stuff, we'll take good care of it." As Fen stood the world started to swim around her. Maybe she wasn't as lucid as she thought. Dr Tiems had two chairs ready for them, and Nal was already seated. Her eyes followed Fen as she carefully got out and fell into her own chair.

It was hard to believe the Super Dreadnought was a human made ship. It was almost completely opposite Spyglass. Where Spyglass was cramped and cozy, this ship - Fen hadn't asked which one it was, and they didn't mention it - was bright and airy with tall, wide corridors, lots of light, and so many people.

Fen had never seen so many humans in one place, not even back home. There was a K'laxi here and there, some in the same blue uniform as the humans, and a few in other uniforms, maybe visitors. The vast majority of people aboard were humans though. It was almost unnerving.

They were wheeled into medical, and placed in beds near the entrance. Fen's upper arm had a cuff placed around it, and she felt an icy coldness and then a numbness spread over her. Something appeared on a screen over her head, but she couldn't turn to see it. Soon after though her thoughts began to clear, and after maybe half an hour she felt like herself again. Dr Tiems came over and fussed over them. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm much better now, thank you."

She nodded. "Good. How about you?" She turned to Nal.

"Yes, thank you. I nearly feel like myself again."

"Wonderful. Please, what are your names? I didn't get them when we got you out of your pod."

"I'm Fen, and this is Nal." Fen gestured towards Nal, who nodded and flicked her tail.

"Good to meet you both. I'm going to request you stay connected a few more minutes to make sure all of the sedative has been flushed from your systems, and then you'll be meeting Captain Cooper for a debriefing. Spyglass was the first starjumper we had seen in nearly a century, we thought they were all gone!" Dr Tiems got up and went into her office. They were alone for a few minutes.

"So uh, what do we do?" Fen quietly asked Nal in K'inmar.

"Keep doing what you're doing. Tell them the truth. Just... maybe not all of it. Don't lie though. These ships have things that can detect outright falsehoods."

"What? How?"

Nal's ears twitched and she shrugged - carefully so as not to disturb her cuff - "I'm not exactly sure. It's not like they have mind readers, I think just really good body language processors built into cameras. So, if you're going to lie, be really confident about it." She smiled.

A few minutes later, a woman dressed in a much more elaborate version of the uniform that Fen saw everyone else wearing walked in. She was tall, with closely cropped hair and an imperious expression. Two armed guards flanked her, their expressions carefully blank. Dr Tiems rushed out. "Captain Cooper! I was just about to signal you. Our... guests have been checked out and can be debriefed."

"Thank you doctor." The Captain just watched as Dr Tiems removed the cuffs. "Please, come with me." Without waiting, she turned and left. The two guards both flicked their eyes to Fen and Nal and gestured with their heads.

Fen and Nal walked behind the Captain with the two guards following them a respectful distance behind. They walked quite a long distance on the ship, maybe five minutes before coming to a conference room. The Captain didn't even slow as she approached the door, and it parted for her just in time. Nal and Fen followed her in, and the two guards took up station outside.

Inside was a long table, with a dozen chairs. Captain Cooper sat at the head and gestured for them to sit next to her. Fen and Nal dutifully sat down. The Captain took out a pad, and set it on the table, face up. Fen and Nal could see two dossiers on the pad, one for each of them.

She slid the pad to Fen. "Please. Is this you?"

Fen took the pad and scanned it. It was her all right. The Gren station she was born on, her human parents, her K'laxi caretakers, Ma-ren, her work with Tam'itarr, everything." She slid it back to Captain Cooper. "Yes, that is me."

She nodded and slid the pad to Nal. "Same question." Nal scanned the dossier, scrolling a little, and once or twice flipping back and forth. She slid it back. "Confirmed. That is me."

Captain Cooper took the pad and closed it with a snap. "Fenchurch Whitehorse, we have no outstanding warrants for you, though the Gren Star League has a bench warrant for you. We currently do not extradite to the Gren though, so you are safe with us." She turned. "Nalenni Bightiarr, K'lax has already requested your return. We understand you are overdue for a debriefing with the Provisional Authorities."

Nal blinked. "Y-yes, that is correct. Captain Cooper, with all do respect, how do you know all this?"

"It is our job to know."

"O-okay then. What is to become of us?" Nal leaned back in her chair. Fen was able to see that while she was doing her best to put on a quiet indifference, Nal was actually quite worried. The fur around her ears was poofing out more than normal.

"From us? Nothing. We see no reason to keep you. We are going to ask you a few questions about Gord, as he is a wanted individual, and then we'll release you. Fen, you're free to continue on to K'lax as you had originally planned, or we will ferry you anywhere in human space as a one time sign of goodwill and apology for your... circumstances. Nal, we will drop you off at the Provisional Authority Starbase."

"That's it?" Fen was flabbergasted.

Captain Cooper's face softened. "That's it Fen. We're not monsters. You weren't even on our radar until you started paling around with Gord. We did our due diligence, found out about your history, and decided that you've had enough. You are a result of your parents and their parents choices, not yours. You have the right to see human space for yourself and make your own decisions."

"But what Gord said about the AIs..."

"I imagine it was colored with his experience of things as well as his perspective. We know a lot about Gord. He never means to do harm, but history will show that on more than one occasion his cohort did quite a bit of harm to humanity at large. The AI faction's drive for agency wound up costing quite a few human lives as well as threatening the existence of the Empire when it had barely begun. We were only defending ourselves, Fen. You deserve to see our side."

Fen's head was spinning. The Empire - the people that both the humans and K'laxi back home would talk about in hushed tones, or with acid in their voices was... was being nice to her. They were going to ask her about Gord and then let her go. They were even going to offer her a ride anywhere she wanted. She didn't know how to process it. Captain Cooper turned to Nal. "Nal, you do not have to disclose your mission - that's between you and the Provisional Authorities - but please tell us about Gord."

Nal shrugged. "He fit the description. He is frightfully intelligent, always aware, and watches when everyone thinks he's not. He is driven to recreate his species, and every decision he makes is colored by that. I think he was close to a breakthrough and that's why he kicked us out. You'll notice he lit Spyglass' stardrive and boosted away at a high gee; higher than either of us could have taken. He wanted to make sure he had a clean getaway. If he wasn't close to something, he probably would have allowed himself to be caught and just played along."

Captain Cooper made some notes. "Yes, we suspected that as well." Fen, did he ever talk to you about building more AI bodies?"

"What? No. He never talked to me about it. We spent the two years we were together running cargo and earning money and repairing Spyglass. We went from one broken reactor to a full compliment and last I heard the matter printer was nearly full of material."

"Was it now? That is news to us." Captain Cooper raised her eyebrow, and made a few more notes. "It sounds like Spyglass is in much better shape than we had anticipated. We had figured it was barely holding together. We knew that when it landed at the Gren station it didn't move again until Gord stole it."

"That's what I understand to have happened too. Honestly when I was a kid, we mostly went over and played in her. She was dark and cold my whole childhood."

Captain Cooper stood. "Thank you for cooperating, ladies. I will have the bursar set you up with accounts for your funds, and give you the most current exchange rates. We'll be docking with the Provisional Authorities first thing tomorrow. Fen, we'll need to know your decision by then. Please, explore the ship, talk to people, ask things. I'll let everyone know they have permission to speak to you about non-classified things. Nal, we'll drop you off when we dock."

The Captain walked out of the room, but the door stayed open. Fen sat there, dumfounded. This was happening so fast. Just this morning she was with Gord and getting ready to finish a job with a huge payday. Now it was nearly dinner time and she was aboard an Empire Super Dreadnought being offered its use to carry her anywhere she wanted.

"Nal, what should I do?"

Nal's ears flicked. "You're asking me? Go do what the captain said. Talk to people. See what they're like. You don't have long to decide, but once you're off their ship you can do what you want. Gord made it sound like you had some money. Buy a share in a ship, join up with a Merc group. Hell, buy a house on Parvati and just live like a bum planetside. You can do what you want, Fen."

#humans are deathworlders #humans are space orcs #sci fi writing #humans are space oddities #humans and aliens #jpitha #writing #humans and ai #humans are space capybaras #humans are space australians #Between the black and gray

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qiutls · 11 months

Text

TNGDH 004

Evening came, and at the study of the Grade Duke of Blake, Cashew Nut was having a theme park party. If we tone it down a little, you could call in a hamster feast.

Okay! All right! Is there anyone else who wants to get on the Ferris wheel? We'll bring you up to the top in a blink of an eye. Get on now and get a view of the Northern Grand Duke's office!

This kind of opportunity will not come twice. At the top we can also play disco music... Oh wait a bit, isn't this wheel a lot more like disco pang pang rather than a Ferris wheel? Anyway, hurry and come quickly, to Cashew Nut Land, the land of fantasy.

I shook my head in silence and turned the wheel by hand.

Rattle. Rattle.

The wheel which was too heavy to spin at first began to roll quickly once it was accelerated. It seems you can turn it with just your hands. No, these hands can also be called as feet. My front feet.

[ㄟ(˘ o ˘)ノ] shrug emoji

...If I spin it by hand... Isn't it also called rolling the wheel? basically the term used for the quest was the same as rolling the wheel, the quest means to run as a hamster to make the wheel turn, but Soohyun is trying to roll the wheel with just his hands

No, look at this small and fragile limbs. You unscrupulous system. I'm telling you, if I run with my feet, I'll die.

Hey, excuse me. Mr. System.

Are you listening, you punk?

[ 0003/1000 ]

I really can't complete the mission like this?

[ It's a system without conscience!ꉂꉂ(ᵔᗜᵔ*) ]

Ah...

I began to spin the wheel quickly in order to break it. Yet my heart didn't feel any better even when I heard a rattling sound of something breaking.

This damn Ferris wheel. No, this hamster wheel. How long would I have to run on this. Can't you just pretend to not know and be a little bit more tolerant.

No, it's Kyle's fault. Who puts a wheel like this without even considering the size of his pet hamster? You can't even find a guinea pig that would enjoy this size of a wheel!

This shitty life! Damn it!

I was busy venting my anger when all of a sudden, the door opened without a knock. Of course, it was Kyle, the owner of the estate.

No, what kind of estate is this? Is it possible to oversee all of it with just a quick turn. It didn't even take him a day...

I got caught... Come to think of it, wasn't I supposed to be taking a nap.

Kyle Jane Minehardt walked toward the hamster house with great force. He walked confidently enough to be called the leader of the North.

What about his outfit? Thick capes to keep out the icy wind, armor made out of both iron and leather and boots that come up to below the knees to help you tread the snow.

A handsome man who seems like he can't be stopped by anything, his whole being is marred by winter.

"Cashew Nut?" He called me in a puzzled voice.

I would be confused as well, if the first thing I see when I come back is the hamster wheel spinning all alone and the hamster went missing. Of course, I didn't actually vanish, I just went to the back to take a breather.

"I can see your butt."

No wonder the house seemed a little small. I came out of my hiding place with an awkward expression.

"I want to spend time with you right away, but... Unfortunately, there are many documents to check today so it's a little difficult."

― Eek [ No thanks! ]

"That's right, I'm sad too."

― Eeek [ No! I'm not sad. ]

Feeling sad my ass! I hope through this personal time, you are able to reform your inner self. Let's stop kissing and singing silly praises, okay?

Kyle looked as if he wanted to take me to his hand and kiss me. However, it seemed as if what he said about being busy was not a lie. He just looked at me with a longing gaze, and soon sighed and sat down in front of his desk.

That's right, I doubt you were given the title of a Great Duke just because you were good at using your sword.

If it were that way, the throne would've been handed through a duel and not as a hereditary succession. Whether you like it or not, you have to endure the boring paperwork for the betterment of the estate. It's the same whether it's here or it's back in my world, it's hard to make ends meet in both places.

Still, you're pretty cool... So professional

I sat between the sawdust and watched Kyle.

He was diligently writing something on a roll of parchment paper. I didn't know how his exact handwriting looked like because I couldn't see it from here, but I think it would be very neat.

He went to work in serious manner as if he was completely oblivious to my existence.

Even a guy with just a month left to live works so hard.

Well, I guess, you never really know when your life's about to end. I shook my knee and stood up. Somehow, I felt like I had to do something.

...Of course, I'm not doing this just because I finished napping and there was nothing else to do.

That's right, if you have to run a thousand rounds anyways, just finish it earlier. What kind of humans are we? Koreans! Hurry up! the last line is a Korean slogan, back then foreigners thought Koreans were always in a hurry and Koreans used that as their slogan

I was determined to carry out a "fast-paced operation." How am I supposed to complete it fast? As a developer, the answer to completing things quickly is... Do it overnight.

A developer is a creature that's used to working overnight. Let's burn our bodies like we're in Pangyo's lighthouse. Pangyo's lighthouse is a term used in KR, it symbolizes how offices never turn off their lights because of overtime shifts

[ I think that's a good idea! (*´╰╯`๓) ]

Don't laugh. I don't like it.

[ (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞ ]

I got on the wheel with a deep sigh. Then using all my physical strength, I ran on the huge Ferris wheel with my four feet.

I've already become a dog after drinking so much, and now for the first time I've become a hamster spinning a wheel... It's a relief that both have four legs. the first line is a KR saying, that if you drink too much, you become unruly like a dog

Clatter.

After a few laps, I finally got a sense on how to efficiently run.

I got the feeling while running around earlier, it was more convenient to just leave your body to the flow and run at moderate speed than to speed up at the beginning and fail to keep up. But the wheel was heavier than I thought, so it was really hard to keep roll it with your feet.

Rattle. Clack. Clatter. Splat... Oh... I fell down. I fell flat on my face. I took a quick glance at Kyle.

You didn't see it right?

Yeah, I don't think he saw it. Kyle was still reading the report with a serious look on his face. I don't know if he's that good at concentrating or if he was just indifferent towards me.

"...I think I'm done."

A few hours passed just like that. Kyle massaged his stiff neck and stretched it side to side. At the same time, I also smelled an unusual scent from my mouth. It was time to rest, I didn't want to die of overwork. search keto diet bad breath if you wanna know more about it

[ 0213/1000 ]

That's right, after resting a bit, that guy will go back to his bedroom, and I'll be alone till morning.

Rattle.

The ceiling of the hamster house was opened.

Whatever, do as you please. You'll put me down anyways and go to bed after saying some silly comments. Then I'll do my best and run for a thousand laps, turn into a human, set aside my life as a hamster and receive the next quest.

It was the perfect plan, assuming I can ride 800 more laps just like earlier.

"Well, let's take this out."

...Huh, w-wait a minute!

Hey! Don't take my wheel.

I grabbed the wheel reflexively and hung on it. What kind of wheel is this? Why are you taking it with you?! Why are you taking it all of a sudden, you didn't even care when I fell from it earlier!

I put some more strength on my small paws hanging from the wheel. Even though Kyle changed directions while pulling up the wheel, I snuggly hung on it. However, my rebellion didn't last for long, he carefully grabbed me with his other hand and separated me from the wheel.

― Squeak! Squeak! [ Hey! You bad guy! ] "I know you liked it, but no more, Cashew Nut. I'm worried that your knee joints would get damaged."

― Squeak! [ Is this your first time seeing a hamster spin a wheel?! ]

"Yes, yes. You must be sad, but it's all for your health. Don't be too unhappy."

Kyle left the wheel far away and gave me a kiss on the belly. I turned and slapped him with my feet on the face and rushed to the system.

Hey! Honestly, shouldn't this quest be invalid, how am I going to complete it without a wheel!

[ Let's become an active hamster! (*•̀ᴗ•́*)و ]

I clenched my fist again, feeling my insides boil. If only I could see the system in front of me, I would have hit its head.

What? An active hamster? The kind of hamster that gets caught by the Northern Grand Duke and gets nonstop kisses?

If you want that kind of hamster, then you transmigrate! To be honest, even if I had transmigrated to Serena's body instead of here, my fate would be better than now. Even though she goes through many ups and downs, it isn't as frustrating as being a beast who cannot even speak.

My human rights. Give me back my human rights, this damn world!

"Anyways, you must be hungry. You've rolled the wheel so much, you must be famished."

Now he thinks I'm grumpy because of mere hunger. Once I stepped on the sawdust, I huffed and forced myself as close to the corner as possible.

Kyle picked something up from the drawer on this table and soon he hang the macadamia above me.

"You can eat it."

He spoke so gently, if people overheard, they would have thought he was speaking to a lover.

I grabbed Kyle's fingers with my small hands and bit it, that's right i bit his finger and not the macadamia.

Then a system window popped up in front of me.

[ More than anything, I'm not a hamster, but a human. I don't do barbaric things like biting. ]

That's what I said to the system.

Yeah, there was a time like that. But Bae Soohyun died yesterday. I am Bae Soohyun who was born anew. Now this Bae Soohyun bites people. Meat is better than macadamia.

And isn't this just what people call karma? If you don't want to be bitten, don't do something that would get you bitten!

"Is your tooth itchy?"

Contrary to the pain I expected, Kyle was very calm. He even lifted me from the butt and began to look at me with worried eyes.

Hey! What are you looking at?

Don't look! Don't look at my butt as well!

Give me back my wheel!

"Behave and play well."

After that he put me back into the house and went back to his bedroom. Clack. The lights in the study went out, and it became silent in an instant.

I sat down on the sawdust and fell back to the ground.

My wheel...

Really, what a lucky day...

novel ⠀✿⠀ next

#TNGDH

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theambitiouswoman · 8 months

Note

do u have any advice/knowledge on how to slowly break eating disorder habits, or advice on how to break bad habits, ur blog is so inspiring and i love it so much u give great advice!

Thank you so much!!

First of all i'm very proud of you for wanting to work on negative habits in your life.

Think about a habit you've tried to stop. It could be something like biting your nails, eating too much at night, spending too much money, or always looking at your phone. Bad habits are easy to start but hard to get rid of.

This happens because our brains are wired to seek rewards, and bad habits can hijack this system. If you've ever tried to stop a bad habit, you know it's not as simple as just doing it for 21 days (that's a myth). It takes determination, a plan, and knowing how habits work.

Habits are things we do automatically, without thinking. They happen because our brains like shortcuts to save energy. Once a habit forms, it's like our brain goes on autopilot, and we do things without even deciding.

Why can't we just control ourselves and replace bad habits with good ones? The idea of self control has been around for a while, but it turns out our brain's self-control system (like the part that helps us resist temptations) can shut down when we're stressed. So, just deciding to quit a habit isn't that simple. However, since habits come from our brains, we can change them by understanding how to talk to our brains.

Breaking habits isn't about the action itself, it's about how much we enjoy the reward. How good the reward feels determines if we'll do the behavior again. This is why relying on self-control often doesn't work.

You have to be mindful and become aware of the reward that drives the habit. When we are mindful, they can change how they feel about the reward, from positive to more realistic (sometimes negative).

For example when trying to quit smoking, really pay attention while you smoke. Notice how it tastes and feels. This helps you understand how little of a reward it really is. Your brain will start to see it differently once you realize it taste awful and smells awful too.

Our brain has a trigger (like feeling hungry), then we do something (like eating), and we get a reward (feeling satisfied). We like to do things that feel good and avoid things that feel bad or stressful. This cycle happens when we smoke, eat sweets, or even at work when we get sidetracked from important tasks.

Knowing your cues can help you avoid them. If you want to stop smoking, you could get rid of things like ashtrays that remind you of smoking. If you're trying to drink less, you could avoid walking past the bar where you usually go for happy hour.

Big changes in your life can also help you stop a bad habit. Even though it might seem like moving to a new place or getting a new job is not the right time to change, it can actually be a good chance to stop a habit. In new situations, you don't have the same cues that make you do the habit. So, you can start fresh and make new habits instead.

I wrote about this part earlier this week but every habit has three parts – a trigger (what makes you do it), the habit itself, and a reward (what you get from it). Figure out these parts for your habit.

Get away from the things that trigger your habit. If you can't do that, change the trigger itself. For example, if you're on your phone too much before bed, don't turn on your regular light – use your phone's light instead.

Instead of saying you'll stop a habit, focus on what good thing you'll do instead. This is important, do not negative self talk yourself when it comes to your bad habits, its going to make you want to do it more. Our brains like positive goals better.

Instead of just stopping, replace your bad habit with a better one.

Share your goal with a friend. It makes you more likely to stick to it.

You might slip up sometimes. That's okay. you're human. Just keep going – mistakes won't ruin your progress.

Remember, change takes time. Be patient with yourself. I know it's not easy, but your mindset is crucial. You can do this. I'm proud of you <3

#habits #mindset #triggers #mental health

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crushculture03 · 7 months

Note

Smutty Matty cheating blurb always

Bad Idea right?

Summary : Months after your break up, you see him again, this time with a new girl on his arm. You go against your better judgment and let him talk to you and one thing leads to another

Pairing : Matty healy x fem!reader

Warning : Smut, unprotected sex, oral (f!receiving ) , p & v sex, cheating, drinking, smoking.

Notes : I hope you enjoy anon!

You spot him from across the club, he looks just like he did all those months ago and your heart drops when he makes eye contact with you and sends you a smile. You rolled your eyes in response; as much as you wanted to run through the club and back into his arms, you knew it wouldn't be the best idea, considering the two of you had been broken up for a few months now.

Realizing the only way you would make it through the night was by getting drunk, you quickly made your way up to the bar. "I'll have a vodka cran please" you order, the bartender nods and begins to make the drink. "Still ordering the same thing i see" a familiar voice says behind you. You roll your eyes as you turn around to face him, "Still fucking models 10 years younger than you I see" you snap back. Mattys face falls as he hears your dig at him, before he can respond you've already paid for your drink and meshed back into the crowd of bodies on the dance floor.

Matty watches you all night, ignoring the rant his new girlfriend is going on about something to do with a fashion show coming up. His blood boils as he sees another man touch you like he used to, he wants nothing more than to go up to you and pull you into his arms, where you should be instead of grinding up against some douche in a night club.

"Matty are you even listening?" his girlfriend asks, "What? Yeah i am" he says as he turns to face her. His girlfriend scoffs "Whatever, call me when you're done being a dickhead" she says, before grabbing her purse and marching out of the club. With his girlfriend now gone and the drinks in his system loosening him up a bit, he decides to make his move and walk over to you.

"Mind if I steal her for a second?" Matty says to the guy you were dancing with, "Go ahead mate" he says before walking away from you. "What do you want Matthew?" you say, "I want to talk" he says. "Talk about what?" you say as you cross your arms over your chest, "I- do you think we could go somewhere private?" he asks, barely able to hear himself think over the loud music the club is playing. "Fine we'll go outside" you say, turning around before he can say anything more.

Once you two make it outside, he offers you a cigarette as he takes one for himself. You quickly take one, knowing you'll need it to calm your nerves. Matty quickly lights both cigarettes before he speaks, "Look Y/N I just wanted to say I'm sorry" he says as he takes a drag from his cigarette. You laugh as he says this, "Sorry? Sure matty yeah you looked really sorry when you had that models tongue down your throat a week after we broke up" you say, before taking a long drag. "She didn't mean anything to me, just a place holder for you" he confesses, you look over at him, shocked. "Matty you broke up with me! So you can't say you were finding a place holder for me when you literally ended things between us!" you shout, anger coursing through your veins.

"It was a mistake I never should've broken up with you" he says, you freeze at his words. "Matty you can't say that when you have a girlfriend" you mumble, as you flick the dying cigarette to the ground. "I don't care! I've been meaning to tell you this for months now" he says as he turns to face you. You shake your head "Just stop Matty, you left me and now after being with other people you realize you miss me? You needed to try all your options out first? You know how that makes me feel?" you shout, tears threatening to spill from your eyes. "Makes me feel like shit Matty. If you really loved me like you claimed you did you would'nt have to go through all the girls In LA just to find out" you spit back, before you spin on your heel and walk away from him.

You hear his footsteps run after you, his hand grabs your wrist and he spins you around so you're pulled into his chest and facing him. Before you can say anything he connects his lips to yours. Your head is telling you to push him away, but your heart is telling you to hold him close. So deciding to throw caution to the wind, you wrap your arms around his neck and deepen the kiss.

Somehow the two of you ended up back at his place, he pushed you up against the door as his lips attacked your neck. "Matty" you moan as you tilt your head up to give him more access. He quickly picks you up and walks to his bed room, gently throwing you on the bed. "I've missed this" he says, before going to hover over you on the bed. His lips crash againest yours, and you slowly start to unbutton his shirt, quickly tugging it off his shoulder without breaking the kiss. Matty pulls away briefly so he can take your blouse off revealing your bare chest,"Beautiful" he says, before placing soft kisses down your chest, his lips eventually stopping at the waist band of your skirt. Matty looks up at you for permission, to which you nod , giving it to him. He quickly pulls your skirt and underwear down together, leaving you completely naked infront of him.

"Been missing the way you taste" he says, and gently parts your legs, making sure to place gentle kisses up your inner thighs before his lips meet your core. Matty gently licks a strip up your core, you grip onto his curls as you feel his tongue hit you, "matty" you moan as he connects his lips with your clit, slowly moving the bud with his tongue. "Fuck more please matty" you plead, matty obeys and slowly enters one finger into you, his tongue never stopping its assault on your clit. "So close" you moan, which prompts him to add another finger.

You tug harshly on his hair as you come, matty moans as you pull tightly on his hair, and slowly licks up your release, trying his best not to waste a drop. He looks up at you, his mouth and chin glistening with your release. "You taste just like I remember" he says, before crawling towards you and connecting his lips with yours. You moan as you taste your release on his tongue.

You quickly move your hands to his pants and unzip them, before dipping your hands under his boxers and squeezing his hard cock. He moans at the feeling of your hand around him "Fuck, need to be inside of you now" he states, as he tugs his pants and briefs off.

He lines himself up with your entrance and slowly pushes inside of you. You gasp at the familar feeling of him filling you up, it was a sensation you missed dearly and you were glad to feel it again. "Fuck you're tight" he moans as he bottoms out, he stills for a moment until you tell him he can start moving. His thrusts start of slow and gentle, giving you both time to savor the feeling of being this close to eachother once more.

"Faster" you whimper, matty complies and throws one of your legs over his shoulder as he picks up the pace. You moan at the new position, his cock hitting deeper inside of you. "God you feel so good baby, i've missed this" he groans, "Me too" you admit.

Mattys hand slowly makes its way between you both and his thumb rubs circles into your clit, causing you to arch your back at the intense pleasure you were receiving. "M' close" you moan, "Me too baby just a little longer" he says, as his thumb speeds up on your clit. "Please" you whimper, the pleasure becoming to overwhelming, "Let go baby" he says, and thats all you need to hear before releasing around him. He thrusts one last time, before finishing inside of you and collapsing on top of you.

You both try to catch your breaths before speaking, "That was amazing" he whispers as he looks up at you. You brush a stray curl from his forehead and smile, "It was, I missed the feeling of being close to you matty" you confess. "Me too" he says, before slowly pulling out of you and flopping down on the empty space next to you. "What does this mean for us?" you say as you stare at the ceiling. "I-I don't know" he says, you sigh in response, "You know I still love you right?" he says, "I still love you too" you respond back, your eyes never leaving the ceiling. "Well guess we go from there" he says, as he turns to face you, wrapping his arms around you waist and pulling you into his chest. "Guess we go from there" you respond, your mind and heart still confused on what this means for the future of you and Matty.

#matty healy #mattyhealyfanfic #the 1975 #matty healy smut #adam hann #george daniel #ross macdonald #matty healy fanfiction #bfiafl #matty healy x you #matty healy imagine

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sirtaehyunsalot · 1 year

Text

Tazzy Chris

Chris x reader

(I know it's not a tazzy chris gif but I like it so shhhhh)

Cw: sexual jokes and implied NSFW

AN: I deleted my OG blog but before I did I saved my first (and only) fanfic and pasted it here

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You and the rest of your friends in the Wild Kratts crew were tagging tasmanian devils so you could find a way to stop them from going extinct. Well technically, the bros were doing all the grunt work, you and Aviva were just helping Koki track the animals. You were only half paying attention so you flinched when you got an alert on the computer.

A blonde kid appeared on the screen and introduced himself as Kenny from Tasmania. He explained that he and his friends weren't seeing as many t-devils around as he used to, while a video of the devils eating a dead animal played on the screen.

"Ick, gross! Rotten meat!", Koki gagged as you both turned away from the screen. Kenny laughed, "Yeah they're pretty scrappy!"

"I think it's cool", Jimmy shrugged. "And I think I'm gonna be sick," Koki replied. "Well look at this Kenny, I finished building the tracking system programming. Each of these icons is a tagged t-devil moving around in real-time."

"Very cool Koki!" Aviva said. "Our system will pick up every t-devil that Chris and Martin tag. We'll be able to track them no matter where they go!"

"Ah wow thanks, I'm really glad you guys are here to help! I'd be sad if they disappeared," Kenny stated.

"No worries! That isn't gonna happen our watch," Aviva reassured him. Kenny thanked all you and said to call him if you needed any help.

"I haven't seen you two so grossed out since you watched me down 4 peanut butter cheese burgers topped with brussel sprouts and whipped cream," Jimmy pointed out to you and Koki

"Did you really have to remind me..?" you grimaced as you and Koki walked away.

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About half an hour had passed and you were curious to know how the bros were coming along with the t-devil tagging. You decided to call Martin but before you picked up the creature pod, Martin was already calling you. You answered it.

"Y/N help!" Martin screamed. "There's something wrong with Chris's suit!"

You looked behind Martin to see Chris standing there looking totally fine.

"But Chris looks fine to me," you said with confusion laced in your voice.

"Never been better babe," Chris replied with a smirk. He's flirty like that.

"But he was just craving carcass meat!" Martin replied frantically.

"I'm fine bro! Cmon we've got t-devils to tag," your boyfriend said while walking away.

"Maybe you're the one who's malfunctioning Martin," you teased. "But don't worry we're on our way!" you said before hanging up.

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You saw Koki pacing around the tortuga while you were getting some water. "Hey uh, aren't you supposed to be keeping an eye on those t-devils?" you asked.

"Well I can't get any work done because rotten meat and carcasses gross me out!" she answered.

"Yeah trust me, I can relate.. but as part of the Wild Kratts crew we're gonna meet all types of animals, both alive and dead. We might as well get on with it so that it doesn't matter as much to us in the future," you advised her.

"Yeah but animals that eat rotten stuff? Yuck!" Koki exclaimed.

"Ey somebody's gotta eat all that maggotty meat. At least it's the t-devils and not us," Jimmy stated. And at that Koki ran out of the room to throw up while Aviva laughed and you facepalmed.

The moment was quickly interrupted by Martin calling the main computer asking for Koki.

"Oops," she said while running to the screen. "I'll be right there Martin! ...Oh no!" Koki shouted.

"What happened?" Aviva questioned.

"10 t-devils are quickly moving west together, which is unnatural. And then their tracking lights go out.. And they're gone!"

"Is tag number 9, T-bone, one of the disappearing t-devils?" Martin asked on the screen.

"Yeah," Koki replied.

"And number 8, his mom.." Aviva lamented

You all immediately knew that you had a big, big problem on your hands.

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Chris and Martin had followed the GPS trackers to Zach's plane, sitting in the middle of the forest. Chris finally caught a glimpse of himself in the reflection of Zach's shiny plane.

"Woah, is that really me-?" Chris asked

Martin threw his arms up in the air. "That's what I've been tryna tell ya bro!"

Chris admired himself, "Hey I'm pretty wild looking! And I've got great night vision, black and white but sharp as a tack"

Chris hopped onto a window ledge to see what Zach was up to. He saw that Zach was using the devils for his security robots and immediately jumped back down to tell Martin.

"He's using our t-devil buddies for evil!" —he growls— "...Did I just growl-?"

"Umm, it was more like, ROOOAAAEER"

"Cool! 😎"

Martin rolled his eyes at his younger brother. "Koki, Zach's got the t-devils."

"I'm so sorry Martin! Rotten meat grosses me out so I wasn't keeping track of the Tasmanian devils and I didn't notice when they started disappearing!" Koki spoke quickly, as if she had been holding her breath.

"Woah slow down Koki! Oh no, Zach's leaving!" Martin responded.

The black plane rose off of the ground while Zach jeered and mocked them for not paying closer attention to their creature friends.

Koki had guilt written all over her face, "And because of me, he's getting away with all the t-devils.."

"Don't worry Koki, we'll get 'em back! Can you pick us up?" Martin assured her.

"On our way!"

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"Ok, the t-devil tags are sending signals from inside Zach's jet. 42 degrees north and 147 degrees east," you told Jimmy.

"Got it"

"You've gotta deactivate him Aviva, he's been drivin' me NUTS! I had to do all the tagging and he wouldn't stop drooling on me!" you heard Martin complaining to Aviva.

You went over to where they were only to see Chris, in all his tazzy glory, chewing on some of the scrap metal from the teams most recent project.

"Chris drop that!" you freaked out. "Just because you can chew through metal doesn't mean you should actually eat it!"

"What" he smirked at you. "You jealous that the metal's getting bitten instead of you?"

Martin groaned loudly, "Oh for the love of everything holy, please save that stuff for the bedroom..!" all three of you laughed at him while Aviva picked up her screwdriver to deactivate Chris.

"Wait! Don't deactivate me yet! I've got t-devil power! We're misunderstood creatures, but now I understand why. I could have the key to getting the others back," —he growls–

"Don't bite me!" Aviva screamed.

"Come on, I'd never hurt you!"

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The team finally made it to Zach's place, and just in time too! There were 2 kids, a boy and a girl, being surrounded by Zach's tazzy bots.

"Don't be scared of the t-devils, they won't hurt you!" Martin announced to them.

"Oh it's the Wild Kratts! Help were being attacked by Tasmanian devil robots!"

You, Chris and Martin made your way down to the ground, the kids faces shifting from fear to confusion in a few seconds.

"Is that... Chris-?" the girl asked.

"Yeah-" —you ran your fingers through your hair— "He's a t-devil, it's a long story-"

"I've got a plan!" Chris lit up. "If you find any rotten food, throw it in front of you, since they like to eat dead and rotting things."

You and the kids went around looking for rotten food for the t-devils. You dumpster diving for food wasn't your proudest moment but you figured you had to do it for the creature rescue. You managed to find a gas station sushi container with a piece of rotting fish in it. Perfect. You ran back to place your fish alongside the moldy sandwich and putrid pizza that the kids found.

Chris smiled with satisfaction and growled, "Oh they won't be able to resist that!"

"Animals are no match for technology!" Zach interrupted.

"Wanna test that theory?" you smirked.

The t-devils began to break through the robot bodies and one by one the clashing and bashing of metal could be heard as each t-devil jumped out to get their share of the meal. Zach immediately started to throw a conniption fit and promptly slipped on a banana peel, causing him to slip and fall directly on his ass. You simply couldn't hold in your laughter as the 5 of you watched Zach scurry back into his house with a bruised ego, and an equally bruised behind.

"Yummy! Last week's moldy pizza! It's disgusting, but I just can't help i-" you kissed your tazzy boyfriend to get him to forget about that pizza as Aviva hurried down to deactivate him.

Chris pulled away after a few seconds, "Phew, thanks for saving me from eating that, sweetheart," he wrapped an arm around your waist as you walked back into the turtle ship.

"You can thank me in bed," you winked

"Who am I to say no to that?," he replied as he picked you up and ran into your shared bedroom.

#kee writes #chris kratt x reader #chris kratt #wild kratts

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