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#wren is after my heart
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guys i was reading the stolen heir yesterday and you know how the kelpie's name is jack of the lake or some shit??? i was going insane bc i kept reading it as jacks of the lake on accident for some reason 😭😭😭
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BYE I CANT-
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petratherrock · 2 months
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After a few days of processing it, my feelings are now distilled to one phrase "what the fuck"
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violetren · 19 days
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Been watching The Way Home with my sister and mentally lamenting how straight it is the whole time, because why at this stage in life should I have to watch Chyler Leigh have to play a straight woman? And some fucking how when they finally gave us the level of queer content I had been craving I immediately went "for fucks sake."
And it's insane because I was kinda shipping the characters (the mc Kat and her long lost brother's fiance Susanna). Susanna is a boss as bitch and Kat... Kat has heart and is played by Chyler Leigh (I have problems with Kat that most come down to how the writers have her making the same self realisation over and over instead of letting her learn, but anyways). They are driven and they love fiercely, and they play off each other So Fucking Well in a way that is much more deeply interesting than the 2 male love interests Kat has. I mean shit I do still ship them. There is so much juicy stuff to complicate their relationship it's fun trying to think how they'd either resolve it or burn the world down.
It's just the show did it wrong.
It felt inserted.
They got less (sub)textual build up than Korrasami got back when they were dodging censors in America pre marriage equality kids TV. Then the timing was so weird but like there wasn't really a better time than just after they had rescued Kat's brother aka Susanna's fiance and were hiding out in a basement low-key giving their goodbyes because Kat can't take Susanna home with her.
It had this air around it like "oh we're not really gonna be coming back here much after this season so we'll just drop in the fact that Susanna has no interest in men and have them almost kiss because then we'll finally tick that box for main cast queer rep, and oh wouldn't ya know it we're coming up on the end of season 2, sure would be a shame if we didn't get a season 3 to explore this revelation."
Don't get me wrong Chyler Leigh and Watson Rose absolutely have the chemistry for it to have been a powerful scene. It's just the writing wasn't there to back it up.
What is so fucking annoying about it is that this can be construed lowkey as an equality win.
Finally a TV show has reached the point where putting two attractive women who had a common goal on a screen next to each other meant Romance instead of it needing to be two attractive people of opposite genders.
AND We finally have just barely enough media rep for this to read as sucky compared to other options. Yay!
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leahsgirl · 2 months
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homemade love | leah williamson x reader
why am i getting attached to a fake scenario i made up in my head i need help.
anyways happy valentine’s day & enjoy this blurb of pure fluff !
-
"do you want mamma to pour the flour or is wren doing it?" the blonde asked the nearly three year old next to her as she made sure to get the measurements right.
"wren do it!" taking the measuring cup that leah held out for her she dumped the contents in the bowl, being a little off target and some ending up on the counter instead. "good job beautiful."
leah had decided to surprise you, her fiancé, with breakfast in bed. it was valentines day after all and she loved to treat you in any way possible. she roped your daughter in of course, jumping at any opportunity to have the extra bonding time with her mini-me.
today was one of the rare instances where leah was actually awake before you considering it was often you having to pull the defender out of bed which was not an easy task could you just say.
"okay crack an egg into the mixture." she read from the cookbook open in front of her. "watch these skills kiddo." leah smirked as she took the egg and attempted to break it with one hand only for her to fail miserably and have the shell fall into the batter. wren giggled "silly mamma."
"shh don't tell anyone." she picked out the unwanted bits and booped her toddler's nose, leaving a flour mark on it.
eventually the pair finished the pancake mix after a quick flour fight and leah poured the mixture into the pan, flipping it with ease much to wrens amusement shown by her excited claps.
the skipper plated them up and let wren take control of the cream "okay! that's enough darlin." grabbing the bottle off of her after seeing what was practically a mountain of the whipped substance. finishing off the meal with a few strawberries and blueberries leah moved it all onto a tray.
"lets take this to mummy shall we?"
you stirred in your sleep as you felt a weight press onto your stomach. "mummy! mummy! wake up." the infant babbled as she continued to climb all over you.
"morning bubba." you gave her a weak smile while adjusting to the light coming through the window. "i made you bekfast!"
“oo did you now?”
"i'd say it was more a joint effort but i suppose she was the better chef." you looked up to see leah stood there with a goofy smile on her face holding a tray just above her waist.
"happy valentine's day baby." she placed the food down onto your lap, bending down and planting a sweet kiss on your lips.
"oh my, thank you guys." your heart swelled at the gesture - just picturing the behind the scenes you wished you were awake to see. "eat it?" wren who had now cuddled into your side looked up expectantly.
"hm i think wrenny should have first taste, considering she did make it after all." cutting a triangular piece out the stack you fed it to the young girl watching as her eyes lit up from the taste of sugar. "is it good?"
wren nodded vigorously and gave a thumbs up making both you and leah chuckle. you had to admit, they were good pancakes, almost too good considering leah's cooking history, she was by far not the designated chef of the family.
"wait hang on i forgot your present." leah suddenly realised as she dashed out of the room.
you look quizzically at your toddler "what's she got up her sleeve now?" only getting a shrug in return.
your fiancé now came back with her guitar she had been learning to play for a couple of months in her hand. "may i present to you ‘you are in love’ leah williamson version."
you couldn't help but laugh when you figured out what she was about to do. playing the chords to the song she began singing looking directly at you the whole time.
''cause you can hear it in the silence you can feel it on the way home you can see it with the lights out you are in love, true love you are in love'
you loved seeing leah like this; all cheesy and goofy, a complete 180 to how she was on the pitch. she may not be fully in tune but she did have a good voice that you could happily sit and listen to all day long.
wrapping the song up she took a bow as you and wren applauded her. "surprised it wasn't 'our song'." you say knowing how that was the older girl's favourite taylor song.
"thought i'd be a little spontaneous gorgeous." she winked as she now plonked herself on the bed so wren was in between the both of you.
"well i guess it's my turn now huh." rooting through your bedside table drawer. "i don't know if I'm going to beat the pancakes and serenades but here." you passed both wren and leah neatly wrapped gifts. "princess open yours first." you didn't have to tell wren twice before wrapping paper was flying everywhere revealing a baby doll wearing an arsenal shirt with the number 24 on it.
you looked at leah for any form of reaction but she clearly hadn't caught on yet simply sharing wrens excitement at the new toy "you can bring her to mummy and mamma's games."
"okay leah open yours." anticipation was bubbling inside the both of you.
the blondes mouth dropped open when she picked up the items at hand. "are ya serious?" doing a double take at the pregnancy scan photos and test she was holding in her hand. "it worked?"
nodding she rushed off the bed to your side, picking you up and twirling you around. "okay okay put me down! i don't want to start being sick before i have to."
she did as requested and held the scan right in front her face still in disbelief. "september 2024, twins.`' casually slipping it into conversation.
"fuck off." she said incredulously which earned her a glare off you, reminding her there is a child in the room.
"wren your going to be a big sister!" now shifting attention to her daughter - it being her turn to be picked up and bounced around.
"sister?" the little girl questioned. you pointed at your stomach "there's two babies in mummy's tummy." wren reached her small arms out to touch your belly "hello!"
"they can't talk yet love, they've gotta grow for a while in there, make sure they're strong and healthy just like you." the centre-back explained.
you smiled at the interaction. leah was such a good mum. you couldn't wait to make your family even bigger in a few months time. "good valentines day gift then?"
leah pulled you in to her side with her free arm. "the best. i love you." she pressed her lips onto yours, conveying every emotion possible. little laughs coming from the small body in the older girl's arms as she watched her grossly in love mothers.
"oh you find it funny when we kiss do you?" you quirked an eyebrow and watched as she nodded.
you pecked leah's mouth again..and again, hearing the giggles make a return.
"i think it's someone else's turn now." the defender smiled smugly and you quickly caught on, both bombarding your daughter with kisses on the face as she squealed happily.
god you loved your valentines.
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luveline · 4 months
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If we're still doing dad thoughts- I'm always thinking about kbd!Steve and how wonderful he is. The whole family sitting cosy in the living room and Steve just giving his family heart eyes because he loves them all so much 🥹🥹
thank you for requesting <3 kisses before dinner au, mom!reader
Steve lets out a sigh of content. He feels like a kitten falling asleep over a bowl of cream, or a little boy the night after Christmas. He feels content, in every sense of the word. He had no idea he could feel this happy doing nothing. 
You’re on your stomach. Finally home from work and with no chores left to do, you’ve stretched out the big green puzzle rug and unboxed Avery’s newest one thousand piece jigsaw. The edges are coming together slowly, the constant plink of pieces as you sort through them colour by colour lulling rather than grating. Avery lies opposite you in the same position. She might be Steve’s physical replicant, but she’s your copy now. She’s even perched her hand in her chin the same way you have, the tip of her tongue sticking out between her lips in concentration. 
Wren is awake yet perfectly happy in Steve’s lap. She’s had enough cooing for this evening, babbling as the cartoon mermaids on the TV begin to sing a big musical number. Dove sings along, nestled under Steve’s arm. Many of the words are foreign to her. She swaps them out for nonsense sounds. 
Bethie sits on one of Steve’s socked feet eating pretzels and clapping when the cartoon sea creatures clap, her hair tickling Steve’s knees whenever she moves. It’s the calmest night you’ve had for a while. What’s better is that, besides you and Avery, everybody’s had a bath, and so all that’s left to do tonight is have dinner and go to bed.
You’ll wait until the morning to shower, decked out in your pyjamas, Avery’s hair swept into a protective style to prevent any tangles or knots. 
He can’t really put his finger on why he feels so happy. Perhaps it’s because, at the end of the day, this is everything he’s ever wanted. He doesn’t need the finer things or even the moderately good things, but he has them. He has a nice, clean home (though it’s fit to bursting now with the newest arrival). He has a wife who he loves, and who loves him. He has his four daughters, their pet fish, and a best friend four streets away who he can see whenever. It’s more than he ever thought he’d get, once. 
“Dad,” Bethie whispers. 
“Yeah?” he whispers back, voice filled with a mischievousness that makes Bethie smile. 
“Why are you smiling?” 
You turn to look at him. “You are smiling. What’s funny?” 
“Nothing,” he insists. 
Dove turns under his arm. Her toddler face is pretty much identical to her baby face, the only difference being her mouth full of baby teeth that she hasn’t quite mastered talking around yet. “You are smiling,” she says, like this is a problem to be solved. 
“What’s so bad about that?” he asks. “It’s a good thing, smiling. You guys should try it sometimes.”
Predictably, every girl looking at him is immediately glaring at him. Well, for a moment, but then Bethie cracks and smiles shyly. “I smile all the time,” she argues. 
“You do. Not my cranky pants,” he says, giving Dove a gentle shake. “We don’t like smiling, do we?” 
Dove, despite herself, grins at her dad’s affection. Maybe she’s forgotten you’re home, but she wraps her arm around Steve, careful of Wren’s face, and smiles into his shirt. “No,” she says. “We don’t.”
He kisses her head, sharing a private look with you from over it. 
Avery doesn’t glance away from her puzzle. “I love smiling.” 
“You’re so good at it, that’s why,” you say. Steve hums his agreement. 
“Yeah, you’re beautiful!” Bethie says. 
Avery pulls her head up, then. “Thank you,” she says, sounding surprised and delighted at once. “You’re beautiful too, Beth!” 
“I’m pretty like mom.” 
“And I’m like dad,” Avery says, nodding. She smiles exactly like Steve would as she says it, driving her point home efficiently. Her lips curve up and her almond eyes thin, sparkling with love as she looks between Bethie and Steve. 
“We’re handsome,” Steve says. 
“Handsomely beautiful,” you say. “Ave, did you know handsome used to be a word only said about girls?” 
Avery shakes her head as you delve into an explanation. Bethie crawls to the jigsaw circle to listen. 
“You’re handsome,” Steve says into Dove’s forehead. 
“I am beautiful.” 
“Yes, you are. You’re all so pretty, ‘cos you get your good looks from me.” He laughs. “And a little bit from your mommy, too. Mostly from me.” 
Dove hears the laughter and it catches like a yawn, her giggles peeling as she falls backwards away from him and into her nest of pillows and blankets. “You’re happy,” she says with a big smile. 
“I’m so happy I could cry,” he says. He grabs one of feet to squeeze her toes. “But I’m getting sick of the mermaids, honey. Can we watch something else after this? Maybe something with real people?” 
“Maybe.” With Dove, maybe tends to mean no. 
He shrugs, adjusting the arm that secures Wren to his stomach carefully. She’s peering up at him curiously. “I can’t win them all, can I?” he asks her softly. 
She smiles and gurgles something unintelligible.
“No, you’re right. It’s just mermaids. We’ll live.”
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azsazz · 4 months
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Little Sneak
Daddy!Azriel x Mommy!Reader [Zuzu Centric]
Summary: Anon Req: What about a part 2 to Sticking Together where all the children are older and Zuzu is upset about not being able to go to the camps like her brothers and cousins. Maybe she ends up sneaking off and gets hurt or something. Some lovely angst would be appreciated. Only if you want to of course, pls and thank you.
Warnings: Angst, suggestions of a child going to be harmed (child is not actually harmed)
Word Count: 2,357
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“Why must all my children defy me?” Azriel questions, pacing the length of the room. You’re almost dizzy with it, how long his strides are and how short the path he’s making is. He’s nearly turning in circles now, wings flared with agitation, growing larger and larger the more he works himself up. When he nearly knocks a lamp burning low with a single faelight over, you slip from the bed.
You halt your mate with a soft hand to his shoulder. His wings tuck in tight, not because you’re going to touch them, because his body automatically moves to give you room. You take it, curling yourself against his chest, hands snaking around his waist and thumbing soothing patterns across the dip of his back.
You can feel his muscles contract as he shifts his wings to cocoon the both of you. Darkness shrouds you, but the light casts red through the membranous skin.
It’s a safe place for the both of you, tucked away from the rest of the world without actually removing yourselves from situations where you’re needed. You and Azriel had found yourselves in this position many times—when you first found out you were pregnant with Wren and Azriel was worried you’d have trouble delivering a babe with wings, when Baz nearly burned his hand on an unattended fire. When you had found out that Knox wasn’t going to be able to speak, and when your eldest sons wanted to be allowed to train in the Illyrian camps.
It’s funny that you find yourself here for the exact same reason. Your daughter, Zuzu, Mother bless her, yearns to join her brothers. Both Wren and Baz have completed a year, along with Nyx and Gideon. The four have formed a group just as their fathers had, not taking anyone’s shit no matter how much larger in size they may be. With the High Lord on their side, the young boys got away with much more than they should, though Rhysand does his best not to stick his nose into matters that should be left to camp leaders.
They’ve found their places as young warriors, and though they often get into trouble, you and Azriel are able to spend more time in Velaris, working on a schedule with both Cassian and Rhys, so that one of them is always staying in the family cabins when the boys are in training.
The beat of Azriel’s steady heart is strong, comforting, even though you know he feels as helpless as you do. Each and every one of your children are as stubborn as their father, even the more stoic of the six, like Jax and the twins. Malos could hold a grudge for ages, even against her own siblings. And poor Azriel refuses to admit that it’s a trait he’s bestowed upon the shadowsinger clan. 
You squeeze your mate tighter, breathing in his comforting scent. Night-chilled mist from the long fly he’d had to take when Zuzu had told him the news. He hadn’t wanted to hear any part of it; his firstborn daughter wanted to train with males in the camps that will do nothing to look after her well-being. They won’t care if she’s beaten into the snow until she’s unable to move, if she can train as hard as the males, if she can do aerial maneuvers better than them. All they’ll see is a little girl who should be put in her place by the only means they know how.
The females won’t take kindly to her either. They’ll likely be jealous of the girl who’s wings are in perfect shape, who has the ability to fly and train and doesn’t have to spend back-breaking hours washing or cooking. No one but her brothers and cousins will be nice to her.
But she’s determined and headstrong. She’d confided in you first, and while you’d tried to talk her into joining Valkyrie training, she insisted that if there were young girls here willing to fight and join such a cause, why wouldn’t they extend the opportunity to those in the mountains? Your heart aches for your little girl, who wants to see the best in people, give them the chances they’ve long since needed. If she can encourage a single girl in the camps to join them as warriors, she will be proud.
“She means well,” you sigh against Azriel’s chest, hugging him tighter. 
“Does she have to mean this well?” he asks, exasperation lining the frown on his face. He rubs your back in a soothing motion, and you know it’s helping him as much as it helps you. His chin rests on top of your head and a moment of silence stretches on as his shadows crawl from the walls, whispering in his ears, reporting back to him on how all of his children are under one roof, sleeping peacefully in their beds. “In a few years, Asteria will want to follow, and I think Rhys will actually kill me.”
“I won’t let him,” you grumble stubbornly, but it doesn’t carve a smile on Azriel’s face like it normally would. “And neither will Zuz.”
All your mate can do is sigh and hold you closer. “I hate that they’re growing up.”
“Me too,” you answer sadly, rocking in place with Az. He caresses the nape of your neck, tilting your face to meet his sad, hazel gaze. “Why didn’t anyone prepare us for the part where our children start growing up?”
Azriel shakes his head, dipping down to kiss you softly, tenderly. You are always his rock in the storms of his life. Always will be.
“I don’t know,” he pecks you on the mouth again, and there’s a glint in his eyes that has your body growing warm. “I do know that we can have another. Then we’ll have a little babe. It will make me feel like I’m not so old, that our youngest aren’t five-years-old.” He says it with a grimace. 
The time is flying by, watching your children grow. Wren is a teenager now. A teenager, Mother help you all. And Baz is only growing rowdier with age. Zuzu wants to join her brothers and cousins in the camps, and Jax is still the stoic little boy you’ve ever seen, focused on working through his powers daily. He still struggles sometimes, needs to cuddle up with his father or you for a moment's peace, and he hasn’t shown any interest in being a warrior like his elder siblings, though if Azriel allows Zuzu to join, you’re sure he won’t be far along after. The twins are as inseparable as ever, stirring up mischief with their pesky little shadows. It’s nice to have them all still so close, but you know it won’t be that way soon.
“Can you imagine another one?” You ask, amused at the thought. More chaos, and you’re not entirely sure how your six children would react. You already have so many, what would they think? 
“Yes,” Azriel answers, tone heated. He presses his hips more firmly against your own and you can feel the hardness of his cock in his pants. It makes your thighs go molten, especially when he’s looking at you like that. Like he’s going to both devour and worship you all night long. “Let’s put this conversation on hold.” 
You can’t disagree with that. 
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•
His shadows wake him up. 
Azriel has gotten used to their presence, but his body is accustomed to them, awakening at the slightest sort of unease from them. Like right now.
He bolts from the bed, awakening you in the process. He almost feels bad at the hammering of your heart he can feel echoing in his chest, if it weren’t for the fact that he’s been alerted that one of his children is currently missing from his home, and she hasn’t been located in the darkness of the camp yet.
“What’s going on?” You’re alert now. There’s something seriously wrong, by the look on Azriel’s face. The way that it’s set in stone yet his brows are furrowed with worry. Not the kind of worry where something is amiss in Velaris, but it looks like he had when Knox had been taken from you, the horror riddling his hazel gaze makes your stomach plummet.
“Zuzu isn’t in her bed,” Azriel answers, and he’s already dressed and heading out into the cold. You don’t expect him to wait for you, the both of you have a way of attacking these things as a team now, and you’re safer here with the rest of the children, anyway, and he curses himself once again for allowing his children to train at the Illyrian camps.
He doesn’t know how she’s managed to evade his shadows this time. His children are sneaky, quickly learning and testing how to keep from his radar, but Azriel is 500 years old and prides himself on his alertness.
Up until now.
He doesn’t even know where to begin. His mind is a mess with ‘what if’s’ and he can’t allow himself to begin pulling at that thread or he might very well decimate this entire camp. 
He very well might, anyway.
Azriel’s already reaching out to Rhysand, waking him from his deep slumber and alerting the Inner Circle. He knows the High Lord will be here within minutes on a plume of black that no one wants to see. Zuzu has been Rhysand’s favorite from the moment she decided to toddle behind him into the longest meeting he’s ever had the displeasure of attending. But Zuzu had made it bearable, sitting in his lap and cuddling up in his arms like he wasn’t discussing convicts in the Prison nor how his armies might be able to help Springs.
A soft yelp is carried on a wisp of darkness from his shadows, his head whipping to where they’re alerting him. It’s Zuzu, and she’s whimpering a little as sharp nails dig into her coat, despite the thick jacket she’s pulled haphazardly around her shoulders. Her boots are untied, and the powdery snow is downtrodden with her footprints.
Azriel moves as quick as the night. He’s known for being undetectable, a whisper of a chilled breeze chasing through the trees. Tonight, though, he doesn’t mask the crunch of his boots in the snow, doesn’t smother the bright blue beaming from the seven stones adorning his armor. His knives are unsheathed at his side, steel singing for the promise of blood.
There’s a soft sound, like his daughter's cry has been muffled, and it fuels his anger, letting his body fill with black ink. It spills off of Azriel in waves, a death god come to seek his vengeance.
The clearing is a circlet of trees and fresh snow. The moon drips down into the open field, where Zuzu scratches at her captor. The female trying to pin his little girl to the ground hisses as her skin breaks beneath Zuzu’s nails. Azriel’s heart swells with pride as his daughter fights back, but this moment alone has made him realize that she does need proper training, and if she wants to join the ranks with her brothers and show all of these Illyrian swill what she’s made of, she will get that.
Azriel doesn’t recognize the female as he rips her away from his daughter by a fistful of hair. The female yelps in surprise, then screams in fear as she topples backwards, the avenging shadowsinger towering over her.
As if she thought she could get away with attempting to harm one of his children.
He feels the night air shifting behind him as he makes sure that his daughter is okay. Rhysand and Cassian appear before the female can gain her footing and take off, Cassian planting a foot in the middle of her back to keep her pinned to the frozen ground while Azriel consoles his daughter. Zuzu’s sniveling, fat tears rolling down her red cheeks as they escape. She doesn’t want to cry, she doesn’t want to show her father that she’s scared, but they fall without her permission anyway.
“I’m sorry, daddy.”
Azriel’s heart cracks a little, molten lava of anger filling the cracks. This female won’t last the fucking night. And if she does, it’s because he’s going to make her death last as long as possible for even thinking of touching his daughter. For making her cry.
He hushes her, a soft noise that makes her clutch onto his shoulders tighter. Azriel’s not wearing a coat, but he’s used to the temperatures, and the adrenaline rushing through his veins helps quell the bitter chill. He sends a reassuring feeling down the bond to you and your relief flushes his body tenfold, his shoulders dropping slightly.
“Are you okay, my love?” Azriel asks her, wiping the tears from Zuzu’s eyes. He swings her up into his arms, pressing gentle kisses to her forehead as he pins the female to her spot in the snow with furious golden eyes. “Are you hurt?”
Zuzu shakes her head and his knees nearly give out with relief. He sways them back and forth, whispering reassurances into Zuzu’s ears until she’s calmed down, before passing her off to Rhys who holds her just as tightly. 
“Uncle Rhys is going to take you back to mommy, okay, Zuz? I’ll be back in a little bit.”
She agrees, blinking up at him with her big eyes. Azriel watches her try to look over her uncle's shoulder to see the female spitting vitriol at Cassian. Rhys doesn’t allow her gaze to see what’s going on over there, instead drawing her attention to him, shifting her so she can’t see, and disappearing into the night to bring Zuzu home. 
Cassian crouches down to the female, grinding her face into the snow to stop the comments spewing from her lips. He whispers something so low that makes her entire body freeze, then thrash as if she actually has a chance of escaping.
Azriel steps up to her, a murderous look in his eyes, and he lets his blades do the talking.
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datgameguy · 3 days
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God do I love how Ame and Suvi’s conflict is representative of the wider conflict between Witches and Wizards. (Long ass post incoming)
First lets look at the conflict in Chapter 2 about trusting Sly’s predictions of the conclave compared to other Citadel diviners. Witches are about community and connection. Ame trusted Sly because he had a connection to Wren, no other diviners in the Citadel had Wren’s trust that we know of just Sly. Wizards on the other hand put their faith in institutions and hierarchies. If Sly’s predictions are contradicted by those of several other diviners with more influence in the system, then his predictions should be discarded. (Also keep in mind that Sly was relegated to obscurity because his predictions were largely about things that didn’t line up with the Citadel’s priorities)
So we get tension at the end of Chapter 2 because Ame (through Wren) has a connection to and trusts more in Sly as an individual than the Citadel’s diviners as an institution. Suvi on the other hand hears Steel say that a group of diviners might have contrary evidence to what Sly predicted and instinctively puts her trust in the institution over the individual.
As a result Suvi and Steel dismiss Ame’s concerns about Sly’s predictions until Ame gets so worked up about the issue that she takes drastic action to return to Toma and prepare. Of course Suvi is right to be upset with the manor in which Ame leaves, it’s incredibly reckless and could have lead to several civilians (and Eursalon!!) getting injured or killed. However she fails to see her and Steel’s roles in pushing Ame into immediate action. Steel never took Ame seriously, and Suvi largely agreed with her.
And now we get to Episode 25 and Suvi’s scathing tirade against Ame.
A big theme of this arc seems to be how both Witches and Wizards look down on one another. Steel has her line about Witches seeing Wizards as “devious, paranoid, and buffoonish,” while Suvi blows up on Ame for “that smart ass tone about Wizards.”
And you know what they’re right. Witches do look down on Wizards.
I find myself wondering how Ame, Witch of the World’s Heart and the steward of humanity, could NOT look down on Wizards. The Wizards of the Citadel may be the brightest minds humanity has to offer, but they use those gifts to fuel a seemingly endless war with Ruve and Gouthmai (a war that threatens the lives and homes of Eursalon’s family). The Citadel seems to glorify violence (remember in Chapter 1 when Suvi proudly displayed that she spilled blood on behalf of the Citadel?). We also know from Kalaya that over time the Citadel went from what was essentially a huge university, to a homogeneous and militarized society.
Thats without even mentioning how Steel herself proves the Witches assessment of Wizards correct! Steel concocts a plan for Suvi that is devious in its intentions, paranoid in its secrecy, and buffoonish in how it could undermind the meeting of the Coven and cost both Ame and Suvi their lives if discovered. While Suvi is lecturing Ame on judging Wizards she has unknowingly agreed to a plan that proves all of her assumptions correct.
Suvi is probably my favorite character in this campaign. Aabria absolutely BRINGS IT every session. I’ve no doubt that many of the things listed in this post crossed her mind and were intentional. After all, the Citadel is a defining part of Suvi’s identity.
Wizards exist in a world that does not take them seriously. We’re 25 episodes in and spirits and witches alike have constantly referred to Wizards in pejorative terms. It’s not hard to see how someone like Suvi, born in the thick of the world of Wizards would cling to the Citadel as the lone institution of the world that advocates for Wizards. Because Suvi is a wizard she is preemptively judged by nearly every witch and spirit in the story. So of course she’ll judge them too.
After all, wouldn’t you?
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pirateprincessblog · 1 year
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Cry For Me 》 P. Seonghwa
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I make these to help you visualise! But you are free to imagine whatever you like :)
NEW! Read the ongoing full version on Wattpad!
𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒔:
One
Two
Three (in progress...)
𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫.: you promised your friend. you asked for forgiveness and gave a promise that you wouldn't even look her father's way. it isn't your fault that you suck at keeping promises. 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: psh x reader x khj 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 6.5k 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: best friend's father seonghwa, seonghwa's business partner hongjoong, smut, angst, bits of fluff 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: swearing, nsfw scenes, unprotected sex, voyeurism, dacryphilia 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: had to include both of my biases :D
𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫: 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐲.
༻♡༺
The pastry shop was flooded with people. It was Monday, which meant new specials were added to the menu. Your special Butcher of Blaviken piece of cake was long forgotten. You didn't even get a chance to taste the inviting red frosting. Oh, to be in the Witcher world now instead of being lectured by your friend. Henry Cavill would understand.
"You didn't think about it affecting us? You didn't fear about losing me as you did it?"
You're numb to the words. Her father fucked the thoughts out of you and you couldn't seem to feel any guilt in you. Yet, you didn't want to lose her. She was the only one who could keep up with your mood swings and random obsessions with movies and books that come and go. She was the only one that returned the energy you'd give her.
"Damn it, answer me! What the fuck were you thinking? How the fuck did you even manage to do it? He doesn't fuck anyone since mom left!"
People are staring, those sitting getting their chairs closer. Your friend is giving them a free show and they're willing to take it.
"I swear to God-"
"I wasn't thinking." You say, looking directly into her eyes.
"What?"
"I was not," you get closer, making sure not to break eye contact, "thinking."
"How the fuck did it happen? How did you convince him?"
The amount of the word fuck would even impress Geralt- well, you get it. I have an obsession with Henry Cavill. Little fourth wall break here. Okay, let's continue. No more, I promise.
Your calmness is angering her even more. She doesn't seem to understand how unaffected by all of this you are. You don't feel guilt simply because Mr Park agreed to all of it. In fact, you had already given up on your plan. He came to you and started it all over again.
"I was snooping around his library and he came, we hit it off and that's all you need to know."
"He came to you?" She laughs in disbelief.
"He came to the library, not me."
Frustrated, she groans and drops her head on the table. You glance at the cake, the chocolate Wolven sword on top of it as inviting as Mr Park in his unbuttoned shirt.
"Listen, I cannot undo what happened. Truthfully speaking, I wouldn't even if I could."
The girl raises her head, her angered look changing into the one of disappointment. You try putting yourself into her situation. You'd feel hurt, sure. But as long as it is a one-time thing, you're sure you'd get over it. It's not like Mr Park will declare his love to you and make you his new wife and her step mother. And that's what you tell her, causing her to calm down a bit.
"Didn't you make similar comments about Wren's dad? That you'd give him anything he'd ask for, if only he approached you?"
She seems offended that you remembered and mentioned that. Still, she remains calm. Her eyes are fixed behind you, concentrating on the moving line of people that are no longer interested in your conversation.
"It was just a one-time thing. It won't happen-"
"I miss mom."
And just like that, she breaks down. Your heart shatters when the first tear rolls down her cheek. After all, she is still her dad's little girl. And no matter what Mrs Park did, she was still her mother.
"Hey-"
"Just let me do what I need to do." She says, her voice trembling as words left her mouth. "I just need to let it out."
"You sure you want to do that here?" You ask, careful not to make her angry again.
She sits silent for a few moments. Her eyes are fixed on the traffic outside, a tear rolling down her cheeks every other moment. You've never seen her so helpless and vulnerable. She is always collected, calm, and usually the one to cheer people up. Now, when it's your turn, you don't know what to do.
"I could do it in a dressing room at Zara." She laughs, then sniffs. "Want to join me?"
And just how can you say no to her?
It is noon when you enter her house. Both of you are drowning in various bags full of clothes. She is an entirely different person than she was this morning. As if it didn't happen at all. You're watching her as she skillfully carries all her bags up the stairs and into her room. You almost trip and fall multiple times, yet you are determined to get there on your own, without any help. She laughs at you from the top of the stairs, then announces that she is going to take a shower.
You balance the bags in your hands, eyes glued to the marble stairs which shined brighter than diamonds under the expensive chandelier. Once you reach the top of the stairs, you put the items on the floor so you can correct your posture and crack your back. You hear a thump, then shuffling. With horror, you watch as two bags start rolling down the stairs. All of its contents are spilling on the way down, and all you can do is watch and hope they'll stop at some point.
But when they do, they stop in front of a pair of polished black shoes. Your eyes stay fixed on the Victoria's Secret pink bag, somehow hoping that if you're not looking at him, he will disappear. Pale slender fingers come into sight, the pointer finger hooked under the handle of the bag. Your eyes follow as he raises it to his head level.
"I think you might've dropped something." He speaks first.
You're not sure what to say. Or do. So you continue to stand like a deer on a highway, your feet refusing to move. Since you're already staring, you take a few more moments to admire the changes on him. His hair is darker than the last time, and not as fluffy. His lips have a red tint, and you notice a slight shadow at the corners of his eyes. He is wearing a black turtleneck, paired with perfectly ironed pants and a belt. He is effortlessly perfect.
He chuckles, then bends over to pick up the items laying on the white tiles. Your legs and brain finally make a signal, and you are running down to yank the items away from him. Your movements are rushed and clumsy, and all the clothes are landing outside the bag instead of inside it. From the corner of your eyes, you realise that he has stopped helping. Instead, he is standing again, his attention now on something else.
You wish the ground could swallow you. A piece of fabric lays on his delicate fingers, thumb caressing the lace as a smirk forms on his tinted lips. He is holding your newest holiday edition lingerie set. It is as red as your cheeks right now, and if you didn't look away, you're sure your head would've exploded from embarrassment.
"Good deal on the set?"
You're not sure if he is trying to lighten the obviously awkward situation, or if he is making fun of you. After all, he is standing there, dripping in designer clothes and looking classier than you. Yet you're standing there, dripping in clumsy and tacky.
"I would never buy something so ugly for a full price." You manage to mumble, then reach for the fabric.
"Ugly? I don't think it's ugly." He pulls his hand away, "It's very... Well, it screams Christmas. And only ten dollars for a full set?"
Unable to read his expression and tone, you stay frozen. You feel so small in front of him. The tone is tugging towards mockery more than towards harmless joking, and you're not feeling comfortable. Tears start to form in the corners of your eyes, your lip slightly trembling. You're a mess, standing in your scattered lingerie and paper bags, in front of your friend's hot father who isn't making you feel as good as last time you saw him.
"Can I please have my things back?" You manage to ask, voice cracking at the end.
His smile drops. The man takes a few moments to examine your body language, and once he realises what he has done, he puts the items in the bags. He takes his time to pick them up one by one, not once looking up at you.
Your sniffles echo through the room, and you're trying your best not to let the tears smear this little makeup you have left on your face. You still have to look a bit decent. Park Seonghwa is now holding the bags in front of you, patiently waiting for you to take them. You carefully soak in the tears with the sleeve of your top. Your eyes avoid his as you reach out to take your belongings. The slight brush of his cold fingers against yours has your stomach going on a rollercoaster. You remember how they felt against your lips as he touched you. You manage to look into his eyes, this time not looking away immediately. You wish to repeat the guilty pleasure. The way he looks down at you makes you want to drop on your knees and give him just what he deserves.
"That look is going to get us both into trouble again, kitten." He whispers.
Still focused on trying not to cry, you don't realise that you are pouting and looking at him through wet eyelashes. He gulps, then glances behind you. He then steps towards you, until you can feel his comforting warm breath on your face.
"That smeared mascara is giving me deja vu."
You immediately remember what he is referring to.
"Will you let me smear that pretty makeup of yours?"
So he gets off to smeared makeup. Ironic, since he always looks so neat and fresh. Not only him, but every area around him too. Your breath hitches as he brings his hand to your cheek, thumb ever so lightly grazing the skin where your tear had started the journey. He wipes it, then brings it over to his mouth. He closes his lips around the thumb, and you see his tongue peeking out a bit to lick the salty liquid off the tip. You are too taken aback by his action, and now you are the one to get a deja vu.
You stood like this in front of him the last time too, only this time, his fingers aren't in your mouth, but in his.
Maybe you spoke to soon, maybe he could read minds. You didn't know. You could only watch as he brings his thumb to caress your bottom lip, as if asking permission for entrance. You grant it to him, ready to give him anything he asks for.
Your core throbs at the way he sensualy massages your tongue with the finger. You allow yourself to get confident, swirling your tongue around it. He lets out a groan, tongue peeking out to wet his lips.
"Don't give me that look, kitten. We can't."
You pull away from his hand, a string of saliva connecting your body parts making both of you feel dazed.
"Then stop fingerfucking my mouth, Sir." You say as politely as you can, tone low with lust.
Before you know it, Mr Park has you slammed against the wall, hands pressed firmly on your waist. You whimper when your back collides with the cold wall, but his actions are quick to distract you. His knee parts your legs, rising a little so that it makes contact with your crotch. You let out a sigh into his mouth, ready to give yourself to him. His fingers press into your cheeks, cupping your jaw so that you can't avoid his gaze. He is looking at you so intensely that you could cum right there on his thigh and knee. The smell of sandalwood and jasmine coming from his neck and chest area is not helping at all. It is inviting, and you don't want to be rude and decline an invitation.
"As much as I'd love nothing more than to fill you up with my cock against this wall right now, until you're staining my wall with your arousal, I'm going to need you to stay away from me."
The tower of fantasies you've slowly started to build suddenly crumbled down under his words. Emotions are erupting inside of you, lust and disappointment merging into each other and creating frustration and sadness. You are sexually frustrated, and this man has done nothing but worsen the situation.
"You'll leave me like this, Mr Park?"
He looks down on your lips, eyebrows furrowed as if thinking about which wire to cut.
Red — the powerful lust growing inside of him. The desire to have you crying under his touch from immense pleasure. The urge to abuse your clit with his tongue until he has you shaking in his arms.
Blue — the fragile relationship with his daughter. He just won her back, and making a fatal mistake like this could mean losing her forever.
Green — harmless flirting and teasing. Messing around and seeing you blush is something he just might get used to.
Park Seonghwa was also very sexually frustrated. But he was also a man with a reputation and half a family. He cannot bring himself to ruin either of the two.
"I want you on your best behaviour, kitten."
You look at him through your lashes again, this time on purpose. His fingers then pull at your hair, exposing your neck to him and causing you to whimper. He looks down at you, and you see yourself in his dilated pupils, drowning in the dark pools of lust.
"I mean it." He says, lips grazing your jaw as he speaks. "Be good for me."
And with that, he steps away from you, giving you one last head to toe checkup. He then turns around and makes his way to the library, leaving you flushed and a mess against the wall. You watch his back as he walks, noticing how huge his shoulders are and how slim his waist is. The things you'd do just to bite into any of those things. If you only had the courage and confidence to seduce him. You can only watch from afar, wishing that he would drop his guard and come to you.
It feels like that evening all over again; him making you yearn for him, then leaving you and disappearing into his space. The promises you gave to your friend are pushed back, and your brain has opened the path doe the thoughts you shouldn't be having. Yet, it's not breaking a promise if he is the one to come to you, is it?
You pick up the bags, this time not letting go of them until you've reached the room. You drop on the bed, face buried into the softest blankets you've ever touched in your life. Your clit is almost pulsating and burning from being all worked up. Touching yourself won't help. It's not the same. You've gotten a taste once, you'll never be able to do it the old way. Park Seonghwa is the only one who can help.
How dare he get so close to you, get you all worked up like that, then tell you to stay away? What kind of sick teasing and torture kinks is he into? Whatever it is, you have already fallen into his trap. You crave him, your body yearns to be touched by his fingers again. Every place on your body he touched on the stairs burns with sensation. You can only let out a frustrated groan before getting up and fixing your hair.
Your eyes examine the abnormally red cheeks and smeared mascara. You looked like you were fucked senseless, not just cornered by your friend's hot father. Although you wish he did the first.
"Professor Gellert gave me this stupid project that needs to be done by tomorrow. I don't know how the fuck I'm supposed to— damn. Are you okay?"
The girl comes in while drying her hair with a towel, eyebrows scrunched with worry as she looks at your reflection in the mirror. Your back is turned towards her, and you're having a hard time looking into her eyes. How can you, when in your mind you're picturing Mr Park forcing your head onto his cock as tears run down your cheeks, just how he likes it?
"Are you sick?"
"The stairs killed me." You laugh it off, pointing at the bags.
"Oh, right." She brushes it off, then throws the wet towel into the basket near the bed. "Do you have a dress for the college celebration next week?"
"I'm not going." You say, remembering how many familiar people will show up.
"Why not?"
"I'm going to have a stomachache then."
You don't even have to look up to know that she is killing you with her stare. Both of you know that you will end up going, you just choose to throw a little tantrum before giving in.
"Your dance partner is so excited for you though."
"I forgot whose name I even pulled. Mind reminding me?"
To avoid having people without a pair, all people were supposed to pull out names. You know you weren't too thrilled about it, but you still can't remember who it was.
"Avan? No, he is with Vic. Oh, Joseph!"
"The Catholic boy?" You ask, now realising why you were so unimpressed.
"No, no, the hot Catholic boy. His hair grew since last summer and his teeth are like, super straight and white. He became the hottest thing to ever walk at that college."
A sigh leaves your lips at the realisation that more money will be reduced from your bank account. You can't go looking basic nor weird. People there aren't the nicest little dandelions, and you are very fragile when it comes to real life. You will need a proper dress, proper heels and equally good makeup. Luckily, you know just the person who will help.
Hours of goofing around, working on the project, and a warning to quiet down from Mr Park due to his business video chat, both of you are asleep. You'd lie if you were to say his stern voice didn't do things to you. He was so good at giving orders, and you are willing to take all of them. Both of you were in your matching satin sleeping dresses, laying on your stomach and watching funny moments of your favorite groups, laughing your heads off and making weird noises on purpose. It was a competition, each of you making a weirder and louder noise than the other. A few screams and laughing fits later, Mr Park Seonghwa knocked on the door. He came in calmly, eyeing up both of you.
"Girls, I have an important meeting and I'm trying to win an opportunity to keep our lives the way they are and not lose everything. Yet, here you are, sounding as if I've kidnapped you and am boiling you alive."
Your smile drops, but your friend remains the same. This tells you that him coming in to intervenire happens more often than you'd think. His usually soft and sparkly eyes are now sharp and serious, his eyebrow raised and his tinted lips going slightly downwards. He is still wearing the turtleneck, only this time he has added a grey coat resting on his shoulders.
"Sorry, dad."
His eyes shift to you, and silence swallows the room. You are taken aback by the intense gaze, and your friend nudges you with her elbow.
"S-sorry, da- Mr Park." You stutter, and your face heats up as soon as you finish the sentence. You wish to crawl out the window and disappear in the bushes. Maybe even cry yourself to sleep there.
Your mission is to seduce him, yet how can you succeed when all you do is embarrass yourself in front of him? He must've lost interest. You are convinced that he is your fantasy come to life, and you simply can't let go. You don't want to let go. Not until you get at least one more taste.
To your surprise, he only hums, then exits the room. You hear his footsteps in the distance, then a door being shut louder than usual.
"He's a real dick sometimes."
In the morning, you are awoken by your friend's raspy voice asking for period cramp pills. It takes you a few moments to adjust your eyes to the morning light.
"Where are they?" You mumble, mouth full of toothpaste.
"Your favorite place in this house." She laughs.
You peek outside the little bathroom to ask why she is laughing and what does she mean by that.
"Dad's office."
You roll your eyes, then return to brushing your teeth. Once you make sure to pick on your skin a little, then put on foundation so that your friend doesn't give you a lesson about it, you head outside.
"You'll see a few drawers below his fantasy section. There's all kinds of pills, just bring me the ones we usually use in these days of suffering."
As you approach the room of your favorite memories and dirty pleasures, you hear his voice coming from inside. It sounds lower than usual, and he sounds very professional. He is saying words even you've never heard of. In conclusion, he even talks expensive and sexy.
"Hongjoong, my marketing team is suffering because they took the most important elements from them. Half of the team quit when they heard who is trying to get involved."
You don't want to interrupt, but if you don't get those pills, you're going to be the first victim of the Hormonal Queen Park. You knock lightly, then slowly open the door.
You swear that if your toes didn't hit the wooden door frame as you tried going inside, you'd let out a moan. Mr Park is sitting in his usual chair, wearing a white shirt. It is halfway unbuttoned, sleeves rolled up to the elbows. You see a thin gold chain decorating his sun kissed skin on his neck. His lips are reddish as usual, and his hair isn't as neat as it was yesterday. His jaw rests in his hand, while his other hand is scribbling something on the papers at the corner of his desk.
He doesn't speak. Instead, he raises an eyebrow towards you. You point towards the drawer, then try showing him that you're looking for pills with your hands. He scoffs, then returns to his conversation. Still sleepy, you forget that you are still only wearing the satin lavender dress. It is when the morning cold breeze hits your legs that you realise. You're already here, there's no point in being embarrassed anymore.
Your eyes read the signs at the top of the bookcase. Adult fiction, Criminal, Erotica, Fiction, Horror... and Fantasy! Right behind his back.
Fuck.
Having no other choice, you get down on all four, and start crawling towards the drawers. Mr Park hasn't yet noticed your little mission. He is too frustrated with his ongoing problem to notice a half naked girl crawling on his office floor. You cheer inside your head as you successfully reach the drawers. You pull at the handle, but it doesn't budge.
"You've gotta be kidding me." You sigh, trying with all your strength. The drawer stays closed, and you're already ready to go home.
The only thing left to do is ask Mr Park, but you wouldn't dare to interrupt. Instead, you crawl to his side, careful not to be seen on camera. You're sitting near his leg, looking up at him while figuring out how to ask. You opt for the quietest solution, and you'll see where it gets you. With a quiet gulp and a sigh, you finally reach out towards him. Instead of quietly calling him like you intended, you gently poke his leg under the desk.
The man looks down, eyebrows scrunched with confusion. He almost chokes on his saliva when he sees you, then redirects his attention at the screen.
"Mr Park," you whisper.
"Hongjoong, I'm gonna have to pause the video for a second."
"That's fine, I'll just go through the mails one more time."
You hear a click, then silence. Mr Park grabs your jaw, forcing you to look up at him. You look like a treat, waiting to be picked up and consumed by him. The way your knees have a slight red tint have his mind racing with thoughts.
"Are you crazy?" His tone is calm and low. The grip on your jaw is firm, his fingers pressing into your cheeks and forcing your lips into a pout.
He can't get over how big your pupils have gotten, and how well he can see your cleavage from that position. The sight of your breasts squished together by the shiny satin fabric combined with your pouty stare from the bottom aren't helping his situation at all. How can he hold back when you're sitting there like a present, waiting to be unwrapped and enjoyed? He had countless comparisons, and hundreds of ways he could take care of you. If only he could.
"I just need some pills," you whisper, too mesmerised by his intense gaze to speak in normal voice.
"So you decide to crawl under my desk to ask for it?"
"I'm not—"
"Right, still nothing. I guess we really lost the proof."
The voice is coming from the screen again. A flash of disappointment crosses Park Seonghwa's face. Still, he leans back into his chair, hand still holding your jaw. His grip softens, and he proceeds to caress your cheek with his thumb. The simple action makes you almost purr. You don't remember the last time you got this kind of affection.
With your eyes closed, your body relaxes into his touch. Nothing exists anymore, except Mr Park, his scent and touch. You allow yourself a few moments of silence. The men's voices are becoming distant, and you swear that you could fall asleep just like this. You feel the slight roughness of his fingers, a sign that he aged like fine wine. You remember your father's hands being all rough and dark due to working hard jobs all these years. Seonghwa must've inherited family business. Or he knows how to take care of himself.
You look up at him, chin now resting on his knee. You aren't sure if you want to climb into his lap and take in all the affection he is willing to give you, or get down further under the desk and make him squirm in your hands. Deciding to test the waters, you drag your fingers up his leg, resting them just near his crotch. Mr Park wets his lips, glancing at you for a second. When you see no signs of complaining, you move over so that you're sitting comfortably between his legs. Your hands continue the journey to his belt, excitement rushing through your veins and into your heart as you feel the cold leather underneath your fingertips. You take your time to play with the buckle, just like you read in one of your favorite books.
Just like the man on the worn out pages of your book, Park Seonghwa gulps when you pull the zipper down, just enough to graze him with your nails. You're overflowing with confidence, and you're a little impatient too. But you want to take your time to take care of him. Make him yearn for you just like he did to you. As quietly as possible, you undo his pants, and are delighted when you find out he is wearing no underwear. You reach inside with your tongue, just enough to touch him and make him adjust in his chair.
"You good?"
"Yeah, I'm good."
Mr Park moves your hands, then pulls his cock out for you. One of his hands is holding onto your hair, gently pushing your head towards it. You don't have time to admire the size or all the little details you wanted. Your lips are pressing against his tip, the taste of precum sweet and salty at the same time.
He is impatient, and in desperate need to feel your hot mouth around him. You obey, finally taking him in and making sure to press your tongue flat against him. Unable to control it, he releases a groan.
"Hwa, you sure you're good?"
"I'm good, I just —" he pauses, looking down at you. How does he tell his business partner and best friend that his daughter's friend looks too good with her mouth stuffed like that? With her tits almost falling out and her pupils so big he just wants to slam his cock into her pussy and fuck her into oblivion?
"Just...? If you're not feeling good, we can continue later. I get this must be very hard for you, but —"
Just when you think you've won, Mr Park shakes his head. "No, no. That's fine. Remember how I told you my daughter wanted a kitten? Well, she's not letting me work in peace."
"Oh, that's adorable. Give her a few pets from me."
Park Seonghwa smirks, then looks down at you. His fingers caress your cheeks, and you melt at the touch. It is a motivation to take him in all the way, slamming the tip against the back of your throat.
"She's a very naughty kitten. I can't seem to get rid of her."
"See, no matter what they do, I'll never be a dog person. I love them so much. Just the sight of one makes me feel all fuzzy."
"Oh, just wait until you see this one."
You freeze in your spot. Seonghwa pulls your head away with a loud pop, and shoves his desk away to expose you. His thumb wipes your drool and his precum from your lips, then proceeds to pull you into his lap so that you're facing the screen. The man on the screen is as frozen as you, and as handsome and Mr Park. His gaze drops on your now exposed breasts, and you see his chest slowing down as he tries to breath normally again.
"A unique one, isn't she?" Seonghwa speaks first, holding your head in place by pulling your hair. You're forced to look at the man, and instead of feeling ashamed, you are only feeling more worked up. "I've never been a cat person, but this one is just so obedient I might actually keep her."
"Well, fuck me. That is one hell of a kitten."
"Come on, love. Why don't we show Hongjoong all the tricks I have taught you?"
You aren't sure what he means, until he lays you on his chest and spreads your legs. Your panties are so drenched, they're almost see through. The man on the screen is devouring you with his stare. Something about both of their gazes and confidence has lit a fire inside of you that cannot be put out. In the corner of the screen, you see your exposed and messy figure spread out on Mr Park's lap, and it only adds up to the atmosphere you are so enjoying.
"Actually, since Hongjoong has more experience with cats, how about he shows us how to perform a some tricks?"
You know he isn't asking, just giving you a trailer of what awaits you. A chuckle comes from the screen, and the man flashes his pearly white teeth at you through a smirk.
"First, you might want to tie her up. You don't want her running away, do you?"
Without hesitation, the man yanks his belt from his pants, and secures it around neck. You are having a hard time breathing. Not because of the belt, but because of the overwhelming feelings mixing inside of you. You've never been manhandled like this, and you are afraid that you might get too used to the feeling of Park Seonghwa doing this to you.
"You still have that wand?"
"Sure do."
Confusion takes over your features, and you can't help but wonder why Hongjoong knew that. Do they do this often? If so, are you just another toy Mr Park is going to play with and leave?
"Relax, kitten." Mr Park seems to notice your sudden discomfort. "Spread your legs for me."
And just like that night, your legs are over the armrests, the wand dangerously close to your clit.
"Having a good view, Kim?"
"A gorgeous one, Park."
Mr Kim leans back on his chair, hands working on his belt but not yet doing anything. It seems he enjoys watching more than doing anything. A sweet vibrating sensation spreads all over your folds, and you cannot help but buck your hips into the toy.
"Make your screen bigger, Seonghwa. So that she can see just how pretty she looks."
The man doesn't pull the gadget away as he changes the screen size, making Hongjoong's the one in the corner and yours taking over the screen. Now you can clearly see yourself; spread on Mr Park's lap, his chin resting on your shoulder, dark eyes looking at you through the camera. His ringed fingers are skillfully moving the toy up and down your clit, while his other hand holds onto the belt, lightly choking you.
"Doesn't moan easily, huh? Try circles."
Mr Park listens, circling the swollen bud with consistent vibrations. You feel like you're going to cum any second, and you don't want to do that so soon.
"Feel good?"
"Yes," you breathe out, holding onto the fabric of his pants as you try your best not to go over the edge.
"Then let us hear it, doll."
No matter how good it felt, it wasn't enough to draw moans from you. "You have to try better than that, then."
A scoff leaves his tinted lips. He brings them close to your neck, just enough to lick a stripe up to your jaw.
"Use your other hand, too."
Mr Kim is so skilled with giving orders. And Mr Park is so good at listening to him. His fingers, which are the prettiest ones you've ever seen in your life, move your panties aside just to slowly thrust between your walls. He explores, wiggling his two fingers inside until he curls them up. With the elbow of the hand which holds the toy, he presses into your lower stomach, making the feeling more intense than ever. He starts pumping into you slow, matching the rhythm of the vibrations.
"I've never seen such an obedient kitten. Look how good she is doing."
"Indeed, she is doing so well. Now, if she could orgasm on my fingers, she would be the best."
"Ngh—" you groan, chasing the orgasm just like he asked you to. You know you can't handle two, but you're willing to try for him. Well, them.
"Come on, pretty girl."
"S-sir—" you cry out, ready to spill over, "I can't—"
"Can't what?" He slows down, moving the wand away for a moment. You take a few seconds to catch your breath. You feel all wet and sticky, but look hotter than ever. You're still unused by him, yet you looked like he has ravished you twice today.
"If I cum now, it'll be too much." You admit, pupils big as you look at him. "I want to cum when you fuck me."
"Spoke too soon about obedience, huh?"
The wicked smirk on the screen lets you know that they won't let you off so easily. Mr Park then slams his lips onto yours, sucking and licking at the plump flesh of your bottom lip as he brings the wand back to your clit. You shake in his lap, feeling a tad bit overstimulated. His other hand holds your thighs separated, but you still try to close them. The warm muscle of his tongue massages yours, and for a moment, you forget about Mr Kim. You forget about your best friend. You wish to wake up like this every day, admired, praised and consumed by him. Your hands reach into his hair, grabbing at the fluffy strands and anything else they can reach.
"That's so fucking hot. I didn't know how sexy you make out, Hwa."
Park Seonghwa smiles into the kiss, and in that moment, you wished to experience it every day. You wished this wasn't just messing around with your friend's dad. Your feelings for him are growing, and you know them well it's forbidden. But how to tell a heart no?
"You're welcome to come over and try these days," he winks at the screen, then shifts his attention back to you. "And just what do we do with you now? Do I make you cum and stop the fun?"
His thumb caresses your flushed cheek. You have a hard time forming a sentence, and all you can do is breathe into his mouth and look at him. His tongue peeks to wet his lips, doing the same to yours in the process.
"You'd rather shamelessly drip all over my pants like this? You just want my daughter to find out?"
Come to think of it, it's weird that she didn't notice your absence. Maybe she gave up. Maybe she went back to sleep. Whatever it is, you've made it clear to her that this is nothing more than just messing around. No romance involved. Even though your heart feels tight at the last sentence, you pretend like it's nothing. All those things you've thought about while touching yourself late at night are coming to life, and you won't try to stop that in any way.
"Mr Park?"
He hums, fingers fixing your hair and eyes scanning your face with adoration. "Yes, pretty girl?"
"Please fuck me."
"When you ask so nicely, how can I say no?" He says with a chuckle, then glances at the screen.
Mr Kim is sat still, looking at everything unfolding in front of him as if he's watching a movie. Or a porn video. His attention is fixed on your breasts, and you allow yourself another moment of confidence. You cup them, rubbing your nipples and squeezing the soft flesh while throwing your head back.
Mr Kim clicks his tongue, then gets closer to the screen. He rests his elbows on the desk, and his head on his hands. "Hwa, give her a little treat from me."
The older man doesn't waste a single second before licking a stripe over your breast. He wraps his lips around your bud of nerves, then proceeds to work his tongue around it. You're squirming in his lap, accidentally stroking him while doing so. He hums into you, the vibrations making you let out the first moan.
"There it is."
You feel so close, but you're too far. Your body is limp, and he hasn't even had you the way he promised yet. As if he could hear your thoughts, Mr Park hooks his fingers under your panties. He grazes over your clit, then pulls the panties down your legs.
"Let's pull a real trick now, kitten."
The man adjusts your body on his lap with ease, and you're too mesmerised by his strength to notice that his cock is at your entrance. It is when he lightly slaps your clit and pulls the belt on your neck that you give him attention.
"Eyes on Hongjoong."
You try to protest, but he grabs your jaw and inserts a finger into your mouth. Your head is now stuck in one position, and you can't avoid Mr Kim's gaze. He has a wicked grin on his face again, and just when you're about to make a stupid remark, Park Seonghwa slowly lifts his hips to enter you. He deliciously fills you up, leaving no space at all. His hot skin is grazing your walls just right, but not yet hitting the spot you need the most.
"Fuck—" he hisses, keeping the slow motions going.
You glance at the corner of the screen, seeing Mr Kim now palming himself through his pants. "You've gotta tell me where you buy these kittens, man."
The man behind you laughs between the moans, but doesn't say anything. He enjoys it as much as you, and isn't bothered to keep any conversations or teasing going. At least you hope so.
He lifts your body up, then moves his hips upwards so that he can move faster. Watching yourself get fucked on the screen by a man your dad's age, while another one watches wasn't quite in your fantasy list. But fuck, you're so happy that it's happening. Your eyes follow Mr Park's cock as it smoothly disappears inside of you, causing you to whine and moan in his arms.
"Think you've teased her enough?"
"Just a bit more." The man whispers, head falling back on the chair and his moves getting sloppy. "Fuck, love, you're gonna make me cum so quick."
You feel like you're dripping all over the place. His cock is soaking up your juices, making wet noises in the process. That, along with his skin hitting yours as he reaches the deepest ends of you, is what will keep you fueled for months. You glance at him through the screen, and you almost cream right there on his cock. Something about fucking in clothes is a huge turn on for you, and seeing Park Seonghwa sprawled out on his chair, with his unbuttoned white shirt and pretty gold jewellery, with his head resting back and eyes rolling from pleasure, with his fingers digging into your skin and hair sticking to his forehead, makes your head spin. You wish to take a picture, and look at it every night just to admire him. His sun kissed chest is exposed more than when you entered the room, and you wish to mark him up so bad. Hopefully, next time.
His hips are going at a slow pace, but deeper than last time. He reaches to all the places inside of you, stroking them all just right. He lifts your body, just to slam it down on his cock and hit your most sensitive spot. A loud moan is halfway out your lips, but he is quick to pull the belt to keep you quiet. He repeats the movements, this time faster and harder.
"Oh, baby," he almost growls under his breath, "making daddy feel so good."
Then, as if something has snapped inside of him, he pushes the chair back and lets it fall back with a thud. His hands push your body down onto the desk, and he grabs your waist like his life depends on it. He adjusts the camera so that Mr Kim can get a clear view of your drooling and flushed face, along with Mr Park's lower body continuously slamming into you. You feel so sensitive, and you haven't orgasmed once yet. Tears form at the corners of your eyes, and you let them fall. You're not sure if you're crying from pleasure or pain, but you didn't want either to stop.
And Park Seonghwa fucking adored it. He adored your face decorated with tears as he took you from behind, forcing you to watch yourself on camera while another stranger is watching you.
"Wish you could see how well you're taking me." He groans. "So fucking good for me."
"Is she taking it like a good girl, Hwa?"
"Oh, she's doing such a good job. Aren't you, love?" He says with a smirk, knowing that you're incapable of speaking.
Your eyes roll back, and you feel like you're going to evaporate. His consistent thrusts are helping you build up the orgasm, and you just know that you're going to cum harder than ever.
"You're fucking her dumb."
"I know. Look at her." Mr Park pulls the belt so that you can lift your head from the desk. Your lips are dry, and you can barely see anymore. Everything is blurry, and you feel nothing but endless pleasure. "Loves being thrown around and used until she cries. Don't you?"
You manage to nod, but quickly go back to moaning and almost drooling all over his desk and keyboard. His hand sneaks towards your clit, toying with it in circles until he has you screaming and almost growling. He is abusing all the sensitive buds on your body he can reach, from you G spot and your clit, to both of your nipples.
"Talk to her, Hwa. Make her speak even though she obviously can't. Make her cry and beg for you."
"Hear that, pretty one? Talk to me. Tell me, who does this pussy belong to?"
You want to kill Mr Kim for giving him the idea of making you talk. All you want to do is cum already. All this teasing is doing you no good. It's becoming addictive, and you just know this won't be the last time.
"Y-you, Sir." You choke out, body still rocking into his.
"Will you take all of my seed like a good girl you are?"
"Fuck, yes, yes, yes—"
"Will you fuck yourself on my cock until you've creamed all over it?"
"Yes, oh fuck, yes—" you groan, moving your hips back so you can fuck yourself on his cock just like he asked you to.
You look at his figure through the screen. His gaze is fixed on the way your tight walls are swallowing him up, and he seems completely mesmerised by it. You use him as you'd use one of those dildos you have saved on a Web shop, milking him just right. His moans are low and the hottest thing you've ever heard in your life. With each minute that passes, his voice becomes lower and much more of a whisper.
His eyes search for yours, and once you lock your gaze with his, you don't let go. You let him fuck you into the desk, with a whole stranger watching. Tears roll down your face, pleasure too intense to take. You groan, moan and whine at each thrust, trying your best to chase your orgasm.
Seeing that you're struggling, he picks you up, only to throw you against the bookshelf. He lifts your leg up, almost resting it on his shoulder. The new angle has you reaching new notes, and he has to stick his fingers into your mouth to keep your noises muffled.
"How cute. Fucking her against the Erotica section."
The shelves shake as Park Seonghwa slams into you, each thrust abusing your G spot so good that you're drooling around his fingers.
"Come on, kitten. Cum on daddy's cock. Milk me dry."
You moan around his fingers, and he takes that as a signal that you're close. He replaces the fingers with his lips, tongue searching for yours only to caress it in the most sensual way ever.
"You close, baby?"
"Yes, yes, yes—"
"Come on, just a bit more. Almost there—"
"Fuck, oh fuck, yes—" Your head falls on his shoulder, hands holding onto them for dear life.
"I'm cumming, love, I'm gonna—" his breathing is heavy, and his moans are now getting high pitched," fuck, oh God, baby—"
You squeeze around him, riding out your orgasm as he paints your walls with his seed. You're weak in his arms as he uses you until the end, making you milk him dry just like he asked. He thrusts into you a few more times, slower and more gentle than ever.
His fingers cup your jaw, lifting your head up so that he can look at you. He wipes your tears with his thumb, then inserts it into his mouth. You can't help but laugh at his wicked kink. He isn't moving away from you. Instead, his lips mold into yours softly. He caresses your cheek as he gently sucks on your lip, occasionally grazing it with his tongue.
"Ah, the aftercare. The best part, honestly."
Park Seonghwa smiles into the kiss for the second time that day, making your heart flutter. "Liar," he mumbles.
He pulls away for a moment, eyes searching your face for any sings of discomfort. When he sees none, he rewards you with another kiss, a kiss so light and comforting that for a second, you really thought he could want something more than just fooling around. Your arms wrap around his neck, pulling him closer towards you and deepening the kiss. You're mesmerised by the way he kisses. His scent is all over your body, and his tongue is taking care of yours in ways nobody ever knew.
This time you're the one to pull away, trying to catch some air. He rests his forehead on yours, his heavy breathing comforting on your face.
"I think I'm addicted to you."
You're taken aback by his statement. You're unable to move, or say anything. All you can do is watch as his face turns from calm and content to one of worry and fear.
"I'm sorry, I—"
"Only sexually?"
Now he is the one who is taken aback. He didn't quite think about it. Sure, he can't wait to see you. He always checks if you're coming in the house with his daughter. He loves seeing you in your bubble when you eat or speak about your newest fandom.
Ah, shit.
"Let's start differently."
You raise an eyebrow in amusement. The man licks his lips, then sighs. "How does dinner this Saturday sound?"
A laugh escapes your lips, and he follows right after. It takes you a moment to collect yourself, then finally speak.
"That's quite formal for someone who is still balls deep inside of me."
A moan of surprise leaves your body as he thrusts into you, more teasingly than sexually. He then proceeds to pull out, making his seed drip down your legs and onto the carpet.
"Want me to try again now?"
"Not necessary," you finally put your leg down from his shoulder, muscles sore from the new position, "I accept the invitation, Mr Park."
He hums, not bothering to correct your addressing. You were hoping you'd get to call him by his first name. Maybe it's too early. Still, it doesn't stop you from constantly thinking about it.
Seonghwa.
How pretty.
𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬:
@scardorosht @kitty4hwa @seokjins-condoms  @variety-is-the-joy-of-life  @rkivesofmymemories @ateezzseonghwaa @bangmechann  @dandelion-aj  @rialovesyunho  @ryleleee  @anoooon13
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faraway-archive · 4 months
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I Finally Saw You Again
Yan!Childhood friend x GN reader
Tw: typical yandere stuff, possession (kinda hinted at)
AN; I should really post their intro post before writing their ficts n' stuff & this has a lot of fluff and not really a lot of yandere-ish. Oopsie. Also put your age on your blog or I will block you <3
˚₊‧꒰ა❤︎໒꒱ ‧₊
It's been a long time since you've last seen your best friend. He has been with you through thick and thin but suddenly had to move away to his parents to find a better job. You hope he's been doing well and that one day you will find him again. You cherish the fond memories as a kid up till high school were his parents decided to go somewhere else. You always wish he had written back since you've seen so many letters but none ever got returned.
And here you are entering college with no traces of him anywhere on social media. You hope nothing has happened to him or his family since they also have gone radio silent on your parents as well. But at least the show must go on and you continue your academic studies.
While you were entering one of your classes, you didn't notice that your childhood best friend was also in your class. You were so absorbed in trying to find the best spot to sit you didn't see his way in the back of the class. Staring at you and fidgeting with his pencil wondering if he should go and talk to you. Biting his lip he decided not to talk to you. Yet. He just watches you from afar. And thus, class started and ended in a blur. He watches you scramble to get to your next class as he casually walks out.
You were here and he couldn't believe it. All this time you've stayed in your home town while he has been away.
After your last class ends, you quickly rush to the dining hall. Dreading the long wait line as everyone else seemed also ended class as well. While waiting you felt a tap on your shoulder and turned around. It was your childhood best friend, Wren. Jumping with joy you hug him and he wraps his arms around you. Once you both let go of your hugs, you realize it is time to enter the dining hall so you quickly grab a seat and wait for Wren to enter in. Soon after you had a lot of time catching up.
"So how have you been Wren? How's your siblings?"
"Things have been well, it was hard adjusting to a new school but I managed. Dove and Robin have been doing well. How have you been doing? Hope you've been doing well. It's nice to see you again," He gives a wink after that last remark.
Blushing from the sudden gesture you replied, "Well I've been doing good as well. I have to ask though, why didn't you respond to my letters?"
Wren taking a bite of his food, "Well, I thought they were being sent to you since I gave them to my parents. But I guess they didn't send it or something came up and it never got to you. Which sucks I will say. Since I thought they were being sent and you just never replied to me. Thought you were ignoring my letters." He softly chuckles at that idea. Either way, he thought, you were going to be his no matter what because he would find you. He would have traveled all over the world to find you because you were the only one who made his heart flutter. You are the reason that he gets out of bed every day because he knows that you are alive.
Taking a sip of your drink you replied, "Well that's strange, I wonder why your parents did that because I was for sure expecting you to ignore me and forget me since, you know, I didn't get any letters back no matter how hard I got them mailed to you. I thought I was going insane."
He hums in response as he continues to eat his food, you on the other hand kept looking at him. You never notice how cute he was or how muscular he has gotten. It's driving you insane with how much he has changed over the years. While staring he can't help but smirk at you looking at him.
"You like what you see darling?"
Taken aback by his words you covered your mouth and quickly stuttered out, "No, I was just admiring the painting behind you. Yeah!"
Softly chuckling at your attempt to hide your reaction, "Ah I see. If you say so."
Quickly finishing your meal you thank him for meeting up with him and rush to go back into your dorm. Embarrassed that he caught you in the act of looking at him. And while doing so he can't help but fall in love again. Smiling at the fact that you are now in his reach. Now that he can truly keep you with him forever he will never let you escape once again.
Ever since Wren saw you in his class, he couldn't stop thinking about you and wanting you. He stalks and follows your every movement. His love for you has re-sparked (not that it was gone in the first place) and he is determined to make sure you are his partner forever.
He couldn't help but stare at you, how beautiful and amazing you looked to him as a kid. You treated him so kindly as if he was a normal person. You were everything to him. He wants you oh so badly you have no idea how much he is wrapped around your pretty finger. Now that he doesn't have his parents on his ass controlling him, he can finally do whatever he wants. What a shame that his parents never gave him your letters but no matter, as long as you were within his sight he could never lose you.
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elliotsblunt · 7 months
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Awaken Me | Tobias Eaton
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pairings — four/reader | divergent au! |
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summary : four seems to pick on you especially—and you figure out why. it’s because you both share the same secret.
warnings : none i think?
authors note : i forgot about this and decided to upload it even tho it’s unfinished…
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© elliotsblunt 2022. do not repost, modify, or translate.
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Your eyes burned slightly as you blinked away tears, confused as to why you couldn't find that certain...
Anger.
Wren, a curly haired blonde that belonged in Amity—somehow landed in Dauntless. But during combat, her frail arms would summon the strength of twice the muscle capacity she contains. If you hadn't seen her flip a man twice her size over her figure—
You wouldn't have believed it.
Anyways, Wren had told you that she had reached that certain level of fighting simply by thinking of what angered her most. The the thing was, nothing horrible had happened to you.
You were born and raised in Amity, where the crime rate remained a negative 0–if that were possible, it would be rated just that.
Your ma and pa sheltered you, as you were their only child. You were also extremely close with them, but after getting your screen test back—it was time to begin a new chapter in your life. One that would drag and smash you to the ground like a bug.
Which is what happened now—basically.
Gritting your teeth, you rolled over to dodge one of your opponents lashes. Fortunately, the girl wasn't a merciless bitch, and let you stand up whilst getting back into position. With shaky fists, you gulped, muttering a quick curse before her own swung towards your chin.
But—
The beating never came. The throbbing rush of warm blood thrashing in your veins never crashed. Your jaw was in tact, and you weren't flopped on the ground like a beaten animal.
Your eyes snapped open, flashing over to the strong hand wrapped around Turner's wrist. Turner, the girl you were fighting, gulped as she stood back from Four. His chest radiated of a warm essence that burnt your cheeks—especially with the smirk dripping off his face.
"Turner," he released her grip, not glancing at you, "It appears the Mary Poppins hasn't improved. Isn't fair to you, is it?"
Your throat went dry, remembering how much of a total prick he was. At first, you thought he was hot, so you deemed him to maybe be a good person. But after you figured one of his life goals was to torment and embarrass you—you checked your values and common sense.
His eyes were dark, but still weren't ever fluttered onto your figure—almost as if he didn't even want to look at you. It damaged your confidence more, knowing you were probably going to be factionless if you didn't shape up soon.
Turner only shrugged, dropping her arm back to her side before placing both hands on her hips. She raised a brow at you as you let out a sharp breath, wiping the imaginary dust off your palms before looking down at the ground and stepping off the fighting podium.
Your ears ring as her blows caused you some damage. Chewing on your bottom lip, you held back your defeated thoughts as Wren threw an arm around your shoulder,
"It's okay. I got a few beat downs my first year here. It gets better," she attempted to cheer you up. You merely hummed as she continued, "Anger, _ _. That's what powers you. You need—“
“I know,” you snapped, stopping your feet before rolling your eyes at her, “I know. But I’m not an angry person, and I’m shit at fighting.”
Her eyes narrowed, “Pity isn’t what makes you a Dauntless, _ _,” she stepped towards you, poking a nimble finger into your heart, “So instead of whining, kid, maybe you should just stop thinking and fight.”
Slowly nodding, you stood there as she headed over to the cafeteria for lunch. You noticed that the boxing bag area was empty—and it clicked in your head what Wren said.
Fight.
Bringing your fists up, you got into a fighting stance and threw your first punch. With gritted teeth, you felt the material bruise up your knuckles—but you wanted to feel it. Feel the pain. If you couldn’t feel the pain, then pity would just Pool around in your chest instead.
And you hated pity.
Hissing as you retracted your first, you did it again. Then repeated on the other fist. Every time the cool leather collided with your knuckles, it sent a sharp pain up your hand. But you stood through it, until the next time you swung, you didn’t realize the bag had made its own hit towards you—swinging and hitting your body with a harsh force.
Letting out a grunt, your body slammed into the cold cement of the training sector. Your ribs ached as you didn’t twitch to get up, instead accepting that you were going to be factionless if you didn’t get back up.
Get back up, _ _. You have to.
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Sweat dribbled down your forehead as you landed another punch to the bag. You made it a mission to skip lunch so you could train, because you'd rather starve than be factionless. Breathing harshly through your teeth, you felt the muscles slightly tense in your arms.
"Mary poppins hasn't improved, has she?"
You felt your lip curl as you delivered another brutal hit, finally taking victory in the bag. You released a grunt as your fists kept colliding with it.
You were going to show that stuck up son of a—
"You're supposed to eat in order to gain muscle. Didn't teach you that back in Amity, huh?" You heard a voice quip, a deep and gravelly voice.
Jumping from surprise, your head snapped over to see Four leaning against one of the bags. His eyes were focused on you, smoky and stormy. You looked away from him instantly, but kept your focus on him, "Skipping lunch won't make you a Dauntles—"
"If someone tells me one more time what does or doesn't make me a Dauntless, I might just fucking shoot myself," you raised your voice, feeling the patience that usually you held snapped like a tree branch. Four's eyes stayed narrowed as he now crossed his arms, the muscles protruding from that caramel, ink covered skin of his.
You gulped, "I meant—"
He stood up straight, a smirk creeping into his plump, pink lips as he stepped towards you, "You're nothing but a farmer. You cannot train remotely enough to become one of us," he hissed, venom laced in his words. Something swirled in his eyes, making your jaw lock,
"You don't have anger. You have self pity, and Dauntless don't pity themselves. They fight, and are willing to give up their life for people. How can you fight others when you're fighting yourself already?"
You blinked, feeling anger begin to rise within you. It was a foreign feeling—but you didn't hate it. If anything, your veins welcomed the poisonous rage, but you bit your tongue.
Four laughed darkly, "You can't even speak up for yourself. Surely, you should go back to those farmers," he continued, making your fists balled up at your sides. As he continued to degrade you and your home, well— people who used to be your home, it rose.
The anger rose. It felt as the ground begun to shake, sudden flashes of all the combat you had witnessed before your eyes playing like a rapid slideshow in your mind. The cracks of the bones whenever someone would slip their foot beneath someone—breaking their balance.
Your eyes flickered up to his. He paused right before you, the scent of cologne filling your nose as your chest heaved deeply. Every sense of angst within you was on fire as he tilted his head.
"You don't belong here. But I doubt you'll be able to go home, since your parents disow—"
Your foot slipped under him, trapping him to the ground with a grunt from him. Your teeth clenched as you aimed to punch him, but he immediately snapped his eyes into yours. With furrowed brows, he grabbed your wrist and striked your leg with a harsh kick.
Your knee buckled, a bullet of pain shooting through your muscles. The cold concrete pavement of the training sector burned the flesh on your cheek, ears ringing as a dull ache formed in your back from the landing.
“C’mon, _ _,” Four chuckled, more so in a tiresome way than a tormenting tone. His chest heaved as I blinked, “Get up. Don’t give up now.”
It clicked. Was he…training you?
A boost if adrenaline shot through you. He believed in you. That was the push you needed to balance your wobbling arms off the ground, barely being able to push your body—but you did. Your fists balked at your sides as you gulped, accidentally melting into his cold eyes.
They weren’t as cold, though. As if the ice had slightly melted—but there was still another thick layer.
“Fighting is a dance,” he murmured firmly, grabbing your arm and spinning you around. You let out a harsh breathe as he held your back against his chest, before roughly pushing you away. You hit one of the punching backs, grunting as he smirked, “Until it’s not.”
“Can’t imagine dancing with you,” your eyes narrowed—only making his smirk grow.
But you didn’t hear a response, instead your eyes noticed he was about to take a step forward. Then, you watched his arm twitch—ducking before delivering a jab to his side. He flinched, which broke the barrier, and you didn’t wait to kick him down to the ground.
With a loud thud, you watched as his braid figure slammed against the ground. Picking up your feet, you darted towards him. Every single insult he’d ever thrown at you replayed in your head. He was trying to anger you.
Did he perhaps…care?
Sliding your knee across the ground, you grabbed both of his hands and held him down. Your hair fell over your face, panting deeply, as you used the rest of your strength to fight off his. His hues twitched to yours, something flashing in his eyes as they met yours.
Your throat became dry. Butterflies erupted in your tummy, a warm feeling hugging your heart.
Feeling the cheeks in your face burn—you felt the world slowly silence around you as your eyes melted onto his. You didn’t know if it was your imagination, or the adrenaline pumping in your veins—but you swore you felt his long fingers slowly graze your thigh.
Wait—
How did they get fre—
And in an instant, you were flipped into the ground. His strong hands held you down, gripping your wrist, as his muscular chest held down yours. Bodies pressed against one another, his grunts filling your ears…it was truly a sight.
A musky scent flooded your senses as you felt like you were high, wanting to reach out and touch that sculpted jaw of his. The stubble poking from his skin is probably scratchy against your palm, but his flesh still looked smooth and supple.
Despite his appearance coming off ragged and rough.
“That’s how you fight like a Dauntless,” He taunted darkly, making your brows raise in shock, “You’ll do just fine in ranks if you uh—“
His eyes fluttered to your lips, before he gulped and squeezed his eyes shut. He pushed himself off the floor, away from you, before dusting off his pants, “You should do just fine, _ _.”
Before you could say anything, he cleared his throat and made his exit.
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corruptedcaps · 5 months
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Head Fucked
This is an unofficial sequel to Head-Fuck one of @misseviehyde‘s hottest stories
Monica's heart pounded as she stood in front of the door, clutching the address she had found after a lengthy search. She hesitated for a moment, her mind racing with doubt and uncertainty. What if Violet remembered her as the same person she had tormented all those years ago? What if she slammed the door in her face?
Summoning her courage, Monica raised her hand and knocked on the door. The seconds ticked by like hours as she waited, her anxiety growing with each passing moment. She didn’t have a lot of time before Wren got home from school and paraded around like the bitchy brat she was now. Finally, the door creaked open, revealing a girl her daughter’s age. She wore glasses and had a friendly face.
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“Hi can I help you?” She asked with a pleasant smile.
Taken aback for a moment and concerned she didn’t have the right address, Monica timidly asked, “I’m looking for Violet?”
“Thats me! Well I go by Lettie. Oh but I guess you actually want my mom right? Let me go get her.” The young girl said and disappeared back into the house. Monica took a moment to come to grips with Violet having a daughter. It seemed appropriate that someone as vain and conceited as Violet would name her daughter after herself but this girl seemed so friendly and nice.
Her mind didn’t have long to dwell on it because a moment later she found herself face to face with a middle-aged, but still outrageously beautiful woman with a look of surprise on her face appeared at the door.
"Can I help you?" Violet asked, her voice cautious.
Monica met Violet's gaze, her heart pounding louder. "Violet," she began, her voice slightly shaky. "It's been a long time."
Recognition flickered in Violet's eyes, and her expression shifted from surprise to a mix of curiosity and something else—remorse, perhaps? "Monica?" she said softly, disbelief lacing her words.
Monica nodded, feeling a lump in her throat. "Yes, it's me. I know this might sound crazy, but I need your help."
Violet's gaze held Monica's for a moment before she stepped aside. "Come in," she said, her voice tinged with a mixture of curiosity and apprehension.
An hour later and Violet sat open mouthed at the take she had just heard. The idea that some magical clay could have made a copy of her was unbelievable and even more outlandish that it would transform an innocent girl like Wren into a mega bitch but Violet couldn’t deny the sincerity in Monica’s voice.
"I'm so sorry, Monica. This is all my fault. If I hadn't been such a bully in school, your daughter would still be the sweet and kind girl I'm sure she is."
Monica's eyes softened as she watched Violet, seeing a mixture of regret and concern on her face. "I'm not here to make you feel guilty," Monica said gently. "I'm here to ask for your help."
Violet looked up, her gaze meeting Monica's with a mix of curiosity and apprehension. "What can I do?"
Monica's eyes brightened with a spark of hope. "There's a way to reverse the transformation, but I need your insight," she said, leaning in closer. "Wren needs to touch a sculpted bust I've carefully glued back together over the course of a few months. It will break the clay's hold on her, but the challenge is that she's constantly surrounded by her loyal betas."
Violet's brows furrowed in thought. "Severing her from her clique won't be easy, they were extremely loyal to me back in high school and I loved having them around to applaud my bad behaviour. But I know a few things that might delay them for awhile," she mused.
Tears welled up in Monica's eyes as relief flooded over her. She couldn't believe that the person who had once caused her so much pain was now offering a helping hand. She hugged Violet tightly. "Thank you, Violet. You have no idea what this means to me."
Violet patted her back gently. "We're in this together now. But we must act quickly. "
Monica rushed home and prepared for her daughter’s arrival and hoped Violet’s plan would work. As the sun dipped below the horizon, Wren stormed into the house in a huff right on queue. Her expression was a mix of anger and annoyance. Monica, acting concerned, approached her. "What's wrong, sweetheart?"
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Wren's frustration spilled out. "Not that it’s any of your fucking business loser but it’s my friends! They just blew me off. I texted them to hang out, and they all had excuses. How dare they do this to me! I might just have to fuck all their boyfriends to remind them who is in charge."
“Wren I have something to show-” Monica began before Wren shot her a look that blazed with a thousand fires.
“What the hell did you call me?” Her daughter said through gritted teeth as she stepped closer to Monica. Monica shuddered with fear but pushed through, knowing that hopefully their nightmare would soon be over.
“I called you Wren because that’s who you are. You’re not Violet, you’re my daughter and you’re going to be my little girl again.” Monica said as she produced the cobbled together bust of Wren’s face much to Wren’s horror.
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Before Wren or Monica could make a move, the sound of laughter and chatter reached their ears. Wren's friends had arrived. Monica's heart raced as she exchanged a quick glance with Wren, both knowing that the crucial moment had arrived.
Wren smirked superiorly at Monica, her eyes gleaming with defiance. "Nice try, Monica, but I'm not going anywhere near that bust," she taunted as she sauntered over to the door to open it.
However amongst her friends at the door was a woman who was incredibly familiar, she had a face that Wren looked at every day. Older Violet stood there, a determined expression on her face. "Oh yes, you will," she declared, her voice commanding.
Wren's smug expression faltered as she stared at Violet in disbelief. "Violet? What are you doing here?"
Older Violet's gaze locked onto Wren's friends, who stood awaiting her orders. "Hold her," she commanded, her voice carrying an undeniable authority.
In an instant, Wren's friends moved forward, their expressions filled with evil glee as they grabbed Wren's arms and held her in place, defying her struggles.
Monica watched, her heart pounding, as Violet took a step closer to Wren, her eyes unwavering. "Wren, it's time you learned your place," Violet said firmly as she took the bust from Monica’s hands.
Wren struggled against her friends' grip as Violet advanced, the sculpted bust in her hands. Fear and anger battled within her as she cried out, "You can't do this! I'm Violet! I'm a goddess!"
Violet's gaze remained unyielding, her determination unshaken by Wren's protests. With steady purpose, held the bust close enough for Wren’s friends to pull her hands onto the bust. Once they touched the clay started to seep off of Wren back onto the bust.
The transformation started slowly at first, a subtle change that moved like ripples through Wren's body. Violet's gaze darkened as she watched, her voice unwavering even as Wren's identity was in flux. "No dear, you’re just a copy," she stated coldly, the words carrying a weight of disgust.
Wren's struggles intensified as the clay's hold on her began to weaken. The confidence that had once empowered her as Violet now wavered, replaced by uncertainty and fear. And in that moment of vulnerability, Monica saw a glimmer of her daughter returning, a chance for her to break free from the grip of the past.
As Violet continued to press Wren's hands onto the sculpted bust, the clay worked its magic with an eerie precision. Wren's struggles intensified, her cries reaching a crescendo as the dark energy that had taken hold of her began to unravel.
In a sudden burst, the clay released its grip on Wren's body and flowed fast back onto the bust. Wren crumpled to the floor, dropped by her bitchy former friends. Violet, with a calculated calmness, took the sculpted bust, a victorious glint in her eyes as she carefully secured it away from Wren's reach.
Monica rushed to her daughter's side, embracing her tightly as Wren gasped for breath. "Thank you so much, Violet. How did you convince her friends to betray her?" Monica said, her voice filled with gratitude.
“Your pathetic daughter was just a poser, her friends recognized the true genuine article when they saw it and when I told them my evil plan to take the power from her, they were more than happy to help, isn’t that right girls.” Violet said with new malice dripping from her words. Monica’s eyes grew wide as she realized that Violet hadn’t changed after all, she was still the conniving butch she always had been and Monica now gave her a change to be young again.
"Please, Violet, it probably wont even work on you. We have to make sure this never hurts anyone again. Please I beg you!"
Violet, unfazed by Monica's pleas, simply shook her head. "Oh please I don’t need this thing. Look at me, I’m still a fucking goddess. No this bust is for someone else.”
Confusion clouded Monica's face as she struggled to understand Violet's motives. Before she could inquire further, Violet snapped her fingers, and in an instant, the bitchy army obediently exited the room.
As Wren's ex friends reentered the room, they dragged in another figure, bound and gagged. It took a moment for Monica to recognize her as Violet's daughter, Lettie. The room fell into a tense silence as the girls dropped Lettie to the ground, removing the gag that silenced her struggles.
Lettie looked up at her mother with a mixture of confusion and fear. Her eyes widened as she took in the sight of the sculpted bust Violet held in her hands. "Mom? What's going on? What are you holding?"
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Violet's expression remained stoic, a mask that revealed nothing of her inner thoughts. The bitchy clique exchanged smirking glances, clearly excited about the unfolding situation. Monica finally put two and two together and said with a sense of urgency in her voice, "Violet, please, let Lettie go. She doesn't need to be a part of this."
Violet, however, seemed unyielding. "Oh shut up you fucking loser. It took every ounce of my strength not to bully you back at my house. You’re just as pathetic as you were back in school. Just as weak as your daughter. Just as soft as my daughter," she replied coldly, her gaze shifting between the sculpted bust and her daughter, who awaited an explanation with a mixture of curiosity and trepidation.
"I had hoped Lettie would grow into a cruel-hearted and powerful bitch like me, but she cares for people," Violet declared coldly. "She stands up to bullies and uses our fantastic wealth to help others. It's made me sick these past 18 years, but that all changes today, thanks to you, Monica, and this wonderful bust you made."
A chill ran down Monica's spine as Violet advanced on Lettie, who was too slow to react. With a swift and determined move, Violet seized Lettie’s hands and forced them onto the sculpted bust. Lettie’s eyes widened in shock and fear as the transformative magic of the clay began to take effect.
The clay flowed deviously from the sculpted bust onto Lettie’s hands, creating an eerie and malevolent connection between the two. Lettie, initially frozen in shock, threw her head back in sudden electric pleasure, a sinister gleam in her eyes hinting at the transformation's evil nature.
As the dark magic took hold, her body underwent a wicked metamorphosis. From an unathletic and nerdy frame emerged a figure with larger, more impressive tits, pouty lips that exuded a touch of cruelty, and sleek hair that tied up into a bitchy ponytail, framing a face now marked by an evil beauty. Perfect skin replaced any imperfection, and her nails elongated with a delicious curve, reflecting a newfound vanity.
Flabby skin gave way to became toned perfection, and her waist tightened to create a silhouette that echoed a cruel kind of confidence.
Amidst the gasps and shock, Lettie’s expression evolved into a devious smirk, embodying the dark persona of her new body. Her eyes, once timid, now sparkled with an evil glint. The room, shrouded in an atmosphere of foreboding, witnessed a metamorphosis that transcended the physical, leaving an unsettling aura in its wake.
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Lettie moaned in delight as she gazed upon her new form. Her bitchy long nails running over her tight new body. She resisted the urge to shove her hand in her panties and touch her tingling pussy.
“Oh mommy, what a wonderful gift. Now I’m your perfect bitchy daughter. I can finally live up to my name. I’m a true Violet now.” The new younger Violet giggled.
Monica and Wren looked on, both transfixed by the transformation that had taken place. Monica was horrified by the evil that she had unwittingly unleashed but Wren was now jealous of the power she had lost. Crawling over to the older Violet, she began to beg.
“Please give it back! I want to be Violet again. I’ll be your perfect daughter, aren’t you impressed with how I made my mom into my little bitch?” Wren said clawing at Violet’s leg. Both Violets looked at her with disdain.
“If you really had her under your thumb like I had all those years ago then she wouldn’t have sought out my help in the first place. My daughter is the true heir and once I put in the papers for her transfer to your school she’ll show you what a true bully looks like.” Older Violet said with a knowingly smirk.
“Really mommy? That’s so wicked and evil I love it! I can’t wait to make you my grovelling little simp,” Younger Violet said looking down at Wren in disgust. “You can start by gathering up all the sexy clothes you’ve bought as me so I can get a head start on putting together my slutty wardrobe. If you’re fast maybe I’ll even let you lick my pussy so you can get a taste of what it was like to be perfect.”
Wren quickly got to her feet and headed for her bedroom but Monica caught her arm and pleaded with her to stop.
“Fuck off mom, you ruined everything! I’ll do anything Violet asks me now, she’s a goddess. I should know!” Wren said with pure venom in her voice as she shook off her mother’s grip and headed upstairs.
“Darling why don’t you and your new friends go up to Wren’s bedroom and ‘help’ her out? Me and Monica here are going to reminisce about old times.” Old Violet said with an evil smirk that was exchanged by her daughter as she and her loyal betas ran upstairs giggling.
“W-what are you going to do to me?” Monica said trembling as Violet closed in on her.
“Oh just something my daughter said really put me in the mood. So loser, get licking, I don’t have all day.” Violet grinned as she hiked up her skirt and showed off her bare glistening pussy.
WEEKS LATER
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“And if I do this, you’ll finally let me in the clique?” Wren asked a waiting Violet. Wren was dressed as slutty and as hot as her dorky body could manage, trying to mimic her idol. However no one was close to Violet and her beauty.
“Yes idiot, you’ve been so loyal these past few weeks that this is your final test. Go into the principals office and convince him to give us all straight A’s for the rest of the year, by any means necessary.” Violet said with a devious grin. Wren nodded enthusiastically and marched into the principal’s office.
“Are you really going to let that loser into our gang babes?” Laura, Violet’s unwaveringly loyal number two, asked. Violet shot her a cheeky smile.
“Well if she doesn’t get herself expelled I’ll consider promoting her to our official cum cleaner. After all her mother is a natural so she should be no different.” Violet said as they waited for Wren.
Meanwhile miles away back at Violet’s house, her mother was receiving a rejuvenating mud facical courtesy of the melted down remains of Lettie’s bust. The mud melted pleasurably into her skin erasing the minor wrinkles she had and tightening the skin all across her body.
Violet moaned in pleasure as she felt twenty years younger. She would take Lettie’s place in the private school she had transferred her out of, losing as her sister and she would cause havoc for a new generation all over again. Her plan made her positively gush and she knew just who to service her.
Snapping her fingers, Monica appeared quickly at the door wearing the slutty maid outfit Violet forced her to wear.
“Mistress you are looking divine.” Monica said like a sycophant. Weeks of constant service had beaten her down into a submissive slave for Violet and her daughter.
“Silence worm. I want that tongue to be focused on doing one thing only now. Now come to mommy.” Violet said with a cold purr as Monica crawled over to her waiting pussy.
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ya9amicide · 1 year
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Redamancy [BTS]
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chapter two
♡ info ♡ k-pop masterlist ♡ previous chapter ♡ next chapter ♡
summary: Hybrids were accepted in society to a certain degree. To some, they are for entertainment. Used as sex and money tools. To lock up and abuse whenever and however they please. Something to have control over. To others, they are companions. Just like regular animals are used for therapy or simply companionship, hybrids are too.
To the rest, they are just like everyone else. Someone with their own life who deserves the same freedoms as your everyday John or Jane Doe. Wren is one of these people. She hates the idea of owning a hybrid. She has nothing against those who own them for medical or companionship reasons. Just the rest.
But, when a ragtag pack of seven mismatched hybrids somehow ends up in the woods behind her home, she takes them in and does the one thing she never thought she would do. Own them. But, she also does something she didn't even think was possible. She fell in love with each and every one of them.
pairing(s): ot7 x ot7, ot7 x oc
warnings: none
taglist: @frieschan​ || @writingwithmai || @osakis-gf || @hiefisch
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Although I knew there were seven of them, it was no less shocking or intimidating now that they were standing in front of me. It was clear that they were all a different species which is shocking as most of the time, packs with both predator and prey hybrids don’t mesh well.
Some were hiding behind others. The ones in front did not look happy with the situation…understandably.
“Hello,” I say, observing how some of their ears twitched at the sound of my voice. “I was going to feed…I’m sorry I never got your name.” I turn my attention to the German Shepherd I welcomed in earlier.
“Hoseok,” he says.
I smile and he shifts on his feet. “I was going to feed Hoseok and offer a place to sleep while the storm is raging outside. He told me there were more of you so I thought I’d offer the same to you as well.”
One of the hybrids in the front watches me. He has shaggy gray ears and a tail to match. “Why?” He asks, tone flat and voice low.
“Do I…need a reason?” I ask and he narrows his eyes and I sigh. “Because you shouldn’t have to sleep outside in a storm like this. You shouldn't have to sleep outside at all to begin with.” They still just stand there. “I’m going to get some more towels so you can dry off. If you’re here when I get back, I’ll assume you accept my offer, and if not…” I take my leave then.
When I get back, I make a move closer to them with a stack of towels, and they shuffle backwards, some letting out low growls. I freeze, body tensing. Without taking my eyes off of them, I slowly place the towels on a side table by the couch. “Feel free to sit in the living room or the kitchen. Once we get some food in you I can show you to the showers and the bedrooms. You can take some of my brother’s clothes in the meantime.”
Moving into the kitchen to make more food, I don’t hear anything from the other room for a few minutes. Then there’s shuffling and I know they’re drying off. From what I can tell, they are all staying in there.
However, when I turn around to start bringing food to the kitchen table, I see the tall hybrid with the shaggy gray fur and I jump. “Motherfu–,” I slam my hand over my mouth before I finish the word. I’m sure he can hear the erratic beating of my heart.
His mouth twitches slightly. “Sorry.”
I wave him off after my heart calms down a little. “You’re fine. I just didn’t hear you coming in so I wasn’t expecting to see someone when I turned around. Would you mind bringing everyone to the table, please?” He nods and walks off.
I set all of the food out and notice that they are all standing off to the side, watching me. “...You can sit down.”
“Anywhere?” The small cat hybrid in the back says, moving to stand behind the others when my gaze turns to him.
I tilt my head slightly in confusion. “Of course, anywhere! I don’t have a preference so pick whichever spot you want.”
The predator hybrids seem to surround the prey around the table. The only spot left is by the shaggy gray one from before. It seems they want to protect the others from me should I try something.
They all wait for me to start filling my plate before they do the same. “So, I know Hoseok’s name. Can I know the rest? Also, I’m not really the best at identifying hybrids so if you’re comfortable I’d like to know what kind of hybrid you are.”
Hoseok is the first to speak up, still nervous, but clearly more comfortable with me than the rest because of our previous interaction. “German Shepherd,” he says, which makes sense as soon as he says it. His ears and tail are full of deep brown fur, both a bit wild from the conditions outside.
“Yoongi,” another one of them says, his tone and stare both cold, “Russian Blue cat.” It’s short and dirty, but it’s clear to see that his fur is a silvery gray color.
The small cat from before sits next to him, gripping his sleeve tightly. “Jimin…I’m a Calico.” His voice is timid and he avoids looking at me. His fur is a beautiful patchwork of black, orange and white.
One of the tallest ones speaks next, his tiny white ears barely visible through his hair. “I’m Seokjin,” his voice is quiet and kind. “I’m a ferret.”
“I’m Jungkook! I’m a rabbit,” one of the younger boys says. It’s then that I can hear the sound of thumping on the ground. His foot is tapping in excitement and he gives me a bright, but still nervous smile. I smile kindly at him and his eyes twinkle.
The big hybrid from before leans back in his seat next to me. “I’m a wolf,” he says and then pauses, as if waiting to see if I would run away in fear at this. I simply raise a questioning eyebrow in response and he smirks again. “My name is Namjoon.”
I finally turn my attention to the last hybrid and almost jolt when his striking feline eyes meet mine. They’re half lidded and observant. “Hello,” his voice is deep and echoes throughout the room. “My name is Taehyung, I’m a tiger.” He grins wickedly.
“I thought packs with predator and prey hybrids don’t usually work?” I ask.
“Most of us have been together since we were young,” Namjoon says. “Under the right circumstances bonds like ours can work.” His tone is suggestive when he talks about how they came together. It’s dark and angry. Clearly, the circumstances weren’t good ones.
The bunny is still bouncing his foot in anticipation under the table. “What’s your name?” He asks.
“I’m Wren,” I say, taking another bite of food.
“What do you do, Wren?” Yoongi asks in a purr. He leans forward, tone sly.
My gaze turns fond. “I’m a writer when I want to be but a professor everyday in between.” I love what I do. Most days I get to teach people about Greek mythology, something I’ve held a big interest in since I was little. And in between all of that, I get to write books about things from the deep recesses of my mind that others get to eventually enjoy.
“How did you guys end up out in the storm?” I ask. They all shift uncomfortably, those who were previously comfortable now retreated back into themselves. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
Namjoon waves his hand dismissively. “It’s okay. It’s a reasonable question. We’ve been out on the streets for a while now. All of us have rotated to and from different owners and shelters since we were young. That’s how we met each other. We all eventually ended up on the streets and just stuck together after that.”
It was safe to say that after that, the lighthearted mood was gone.
When everyone finished eating, I guided them upstairs to the different bedrooms and bathrooms. “Here are some clothes. They should fit relatively well,” I hand them each a pile of clothes to choose from. “They’re my brothers. He used to live with me but when he moved out he left some stuff behind. There are towels and toiletries in the cabinets. You all can choose between any of the bedrooms except mine of course. So, any room besides the last one on the right is free reign. If you get hungry feel free to raid the kitchen, I just ask that you clean up any messes you make.”
I watch them all shuffle where they stand. I blow out a breath of air and awkwardly rock on my heels. “Well, if you need anything don’t be afraid to come ask. I have nothing going on tomorrow so don’t be afraid to wake me. All I ask is that you knock before you come into my room.” Knowing they won’t give me any further answers, I walk down the hall to my room. Giving them one last look over my shoulder, I quietly close the door behind me.
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fortheloveofwonderland · 11 months
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Somewhere to Belong | 2/3 | S.R
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Part 2 of my Family Challenge Fic.
Part 1 | Part 3
Summery - Spencer moves into his new home and his friends express their concerns. His adoption process hits wall after wall and each time you’re the one he turns to.
Pairing - Spencer Reid x BAU Fem! Reader
Warnings - talk of break ups, arguing, tears, swearing, mentions of Spencer’s childhood, drinking, drunk Spencer, talk of potential relapse, crying child, NA meetings.
WC - 7.9k
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Part 2
It took until the end of April, around the time flowers started to rebloom and the grass turned a lush shade of green, when he finally got the keys to his new home. 
It felt fitting, the way the world was regrowing, starting a new beginning just as he was. 
He’d taken the first offer that came on his apartment, not caring that it was less than he would have liked for it. He had enough money saved from over the years that he could cover the difference needed. Time was of the essence, he couldn’t wait around. 
The team, now all apprised of his adoption intentions, helped him move on a rare weekend they had off from the BAU. Well all of them except for you anyway. 
Luke and Matt did most of the heavy lifting, much to Spencer’s elation as honestly he had no idea how he’d planned on doing it himself. 
Rossi, Emily and Tara helped fix together furniture while he and JJ started on painting the room that would hopefully one day belong to Wren. 
It broke her heart a little as she aided him in filling the little bookshelf with all the girls favourite titles and putting stuffed animals on another shelf all of which he’d brought for her. 
Because what happened if Wren didn’t come home to him? What on Earth would be left of her best friend if he wasn’t able to adopt her? 
He’d spent nearly all his savings on this house and furnishing it, even stencilling Wren’s name above the bed. She knew there would be no coming back for him if this didn’t work out. She would help in any way she could but she wished he was erring on the side of caution more. 
After hours spent getting Spencer’s new home in order, Rossi cooked them all carbonara alla Rossi which they all sat down to eat as a family. 
Minus you. 
And your absence was brought up about halfway through dinner. 
“I have to ask,” it was Tara who finally dared broach the subject that was on the tip of everyone’s tongues. “Y/N was really cagey when we told her about today. She said she had plans but wouldn’t say what they were.” 
“Did something happen between the two of you?” JJ added over her glass of wine. 
Honestly Spencer didn’t really see the point in lying about it. Whatever happened between the two of you was over now so he supposed it didn’t matter if the team knew. 
He put his cutlery down, leaning it on the edges of his plate and taking a sip of water. He leant on the table and cleared his throat. 
“Uh well…we were dating.” He shrugged. “For a few months. But it’s over now.” 
The members of his former team all exchanged looks, silently questioning each other to see if anyone had any idea. It seemed none of them did. 
“Wow, I’m kinda impressed you managed to keep that from us.” Emily chuckled dryly. 
“Me too.” Spencer replied. 
“What happened?” Matt asked the million dollar question. 
Again, Spencer didn’t see the point in lying. It wasn’t as though there were two sides to this story, it was cut and dry; about as straightforward as it could be. 
“I wanted a family. She wasn’t ready. I guess that’s on me for choosing to date someone so much younger than me.” He shrugged again, trying to act as if he didn’t care. 
“So you broke up because of Wren?” JJ asked him softly. 
“Yes and no. I’d already mentioned having a family before Wren came into the picture and she freaked out. And then Wren came along and I realised it was perfect timing. But uh, I guess my decision to adopt her didn’t exactly help matters.” He picked his knife and fork back up, hoping if he resumed eating they would understand he didn’t want to talk about this. 
“You’re sure about this right, Reid?” Luke dared to ask. 
Spencer huffed and dropped his cutlery again, letting them angrily clang against the China plate. 
“Am I sure about what, Alvez?” He shot Luke a look across the table none of the team had ever seen on Spencer before. “About my break up or about adopting Wren?” 
Luke shrunk in on himself a little, Spencer’s gaze heavily upon him. He’d hoped maybe someone else would jump to his rescue but no one did. 
Cowards.
“Any of it.” Luke’s voice cracked as he spoke. “We’re your friends and we want you to be happy, but I think I speak for everyone when I say this is all happening so fast.” 
Spencer’s nostrils flared. His jaw tightened. One by one he looked at the former members of his team under a steely gaze. 
“Does he speak for all of you?” Spencer spat. “Someone please speak up. If you all think I’m making such a huge mistake, please-”
“No one said it was a mistake, boy wonder, chill.” Garcia piped up, cutting Spencer off. “But Newbie is right, it’s so fast. Have you really stopped and taken a breath to think about it?”
“You’ve decorated her room, Spence and you don’t even know that you’ll get granted parental rights. What happens if you don’t? It’s going to crush you.” JJ added, her tone sombre. 
“And if you do manage to get through the adoption process, you’ll have a five year old girl to take care of. A five year old girl who lost her parents in the most horrific way possible.” Tara chimed in, tone equally as morose and JJ’s. 
“And you’ll be doing it alone. On top of a full time job at the university.” It was Rossi’s turn to speak. 
“We’ll support you whatever you do, Reid. We’re just worried that this is some kind of…a, uh…” Emily trailed off, looking at the others for help with finishing her sentence. 
But Spencer knew exactly what she wanted to say. 
He slammed his hands on the table and pushed his seat back, the wooden chair legs scraping against the tiled floor aggressively. 
“Just say it,” he growled, with a shake of his head. “You’re worried I’m having a mid life crisis, right?” 
He got to his feet and glared down at his so-called friends in disdain. 
“No one said it was a mid life crisis, kid.” Rossi sighed as though Spencer was some kind of nuisance child. 
“You didn’t need to say it. You’re all thinking it.” He grunted. 
“Spence,” Emily looked sadly at him. “We’re just worried about you.”
“I don’t need you to be worried about me, I am perfectly fine. Why is it such a big deal that I’m doing this? You know I’ve always wanted kids.” 
“Not like this though.” JJ rolled her lip between her teeth. “I have absolutely no doubt you will be a good father, someday. This…it doesn’t seem right.” 
“Thank you all for coming,” Spencer forced his anger down before he said something he would regret. “But I’d like you all to leave now.” 
He turned his back on them, the way they had all metaphorically turned their backs on him, and stormed to the kitchen. 
The rest of them silently decided among themselves who would be the one to go after him. Usually the job would fall to JJ but she knew Spencer was too angry with her right now. 
Eventually Penelope exhaled and pushed her chair gently back before getting to her feet. She didn’t look at the others as she left, tottering on her too high heels as she followed in Spencer’s wake. 
He heard the door swing open, heard her heels on the floor so he knew it was her. He gripped the counter top, his back to her. 
“Please don’t try to make it better, Garcia.” He spoke without turning. 
He heard her come closer and then there was a warm hand on his shoulder, turning him around. When she saw his face, the tears that were now rolling down his cheeks, her own face fell. 
“Oh boy wonder,” she pouted, immediately throwing her arms around him. 
Spencer sniffed, burying his head against Garcia’s shoulder and wrapping his arms around her waist. 
“I understand what you’re all saying, trust me I get how crazy this sounds.” He whimpered a little. “But I love that little girl. And I want to be her father more than anything else in the world.”
“I know you do, Reid.” She cooed, running her hand up and down his back. “We just worry about you is all. No one is saying you shouldn’t do this, we just want to make sure you’re certain of what you’re doing.” 
“Penelope,” he raised his head so he could look her in the eyes. “I have never been more sure about a single thing in my life.” 
Garcia smiled at him softly, wiping away the tear stains on his cheeks. 
“That’s good enough for me.” She placed a gentle kiss on his forehead. “Anything you need, Spencer, just say the word. If you need any red tape cutting through, I am a master of that.”
“Thanks Garcia.” He half-smiled. “I’ll bear that in mind.” 
Garcia kindly corralled the others out of Spencer’s door and stayed to help him clean up. By the time she left he was utterly exhausted. 
He climbed the stairs, running his fingers along the bannister, feeling his way in his new home. He bypassed his own bedroom and found himself in the room he’d slaved away to make perfect for Wren. 
He collapsed on her small bed, the one with the My Little Pony bedspread, clutching one of many stuffed toys he’d brought for her. 
He closed his eyes and he nuzzled against the pillow. If he concentrated hard enough he could feel her here in this room she’d never actually stepped foot in. 
He could hear her heart warming giggle, smell her on the pillow. He could imagine her crawling under the pink pony bedspread, lying beneath a string of pumpkin fairy lights while he read to her. 
He could hear her inquisitive line of questioning every time he reached the end of a page. 
He could picture her hugging Rover tightly to her chest while her bright green eyes slowly closed. 
His tears fell from behind his closed lids. His friends were right and he hated that. 
He’d gone through all this trouble, all the time, money and effort but what if it proved fruitless? What if he never got to bring Wren home? 
What if he was doomed to live in this large house all alone for the rest of his days, pinning for the life he could have had?
***
Two days later a social worker came round to do her initial assessment of his new home. He didn’t miss the small smile that crept to her face when she saw the room he hoped to be Wren’s.
He made tea and sat down in his new living room with Jenny, Wren’s permanent social worker and tried to mentally prepare himself for another grilling. 
The application process itself had been particularly probing but he knew this would be worse. Garcia had emailed him over a list of potential questions which he’d tried to cultivate answers for ahead of time but right now everything went out of his head.
Jenny sipped her tea and retrieved a notebook and pen from her bag. 
“So, shall we?” She smiled at him but it didn’t help alleviate his nerves. 
“Sure.” He nodded, shakily smiling back. He drummed his fingers against his thighs. 
“I’d like to know what your childhood was like, if you could, Doctor Reid.” 
Fuck, what a place to start.
“Well,” he swallowed thickly. “It wasn’t exactly conventional. I’m sure you know about my mother from my application.” 
“I do.” She nodded, pen poised above the page. 
“Uh, I was pretty much responsible for myself from ten years old when my dad left. And I was also responsible for my mom. I’ve never really had anyone to depend on and on top of that I’ve had to look after a parent. I guess the parental roles got slightly tangled in my head somewhere, but I think it’s why I’m so determined to do right by Wren. She’s lost her parents and I just want her to have a family again. I want to be her family. I want to be the father I never had.” He took a big sip of tea as a way of indicating that he was finished. 
Jenny jotted down some notes before looking back at him.
“So what’s your relationship with them like now? Your parents?” 
“I’ve only ever seen my dad once since he walked out on us.” When I was accusing him of being a child molestor and a murderer. “I’m really close with my mom though. She’s in a facility in DC and I visit her once a week. She’d love Wren, I think Wren would love her too.” 
“I think you’ve already kind of covered the effect your upbringing had on you, so I’d be interested to know what a day in the life of Spencer Reid looks like.” She paused her note taking again to look at him. 
“I’m still getting used to that myself if truth be told. I left the BAU after fifteen years so I could have a job with more reliable hours for Wren. I lecture four days a week at Marlborough, I’m a criminology professor. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday. Thursdays are usually paperwork and grading papers but I can do that from home. 
It’s normal hours, I can be here in the morning to take Wren to school and be here to pick her up and cook her dinner. Read her bedtime stories. She likes it when we read together. She has this incredible mind, she reminds me of me when I was a kid. She’s so curious and smart. She loves to learn and I love to teach and I…I’m rambling. Sorry.” 
“It’s ok.” Jenny smiled softly. “Doctor Reid, no one is doubting the fact that you care deeply for this little girl. No one would be going through the lengths you’re going through for a flight of fancy. I’m just simply trying to ascertain the best fit for a frightened and traumatised little girl who lost everything.” 
“And I might not be the best fit.” He sniffed, eyebrows knitting together. “Because it’s just me. Because she lost not only her dad but her mom too and you think she needs two parents.” 
He was a profiler for so many years, he couldn’t just turn it off. He understood the things she wasn’t saying. 
Jenny put her pen down and leant forward in the chair. 
“I have no doubts that you love Wren, Doctor Reid.” She prefaced. “But unfortunately in these kinds of delicate situations we have to consider where the child has been. And where Wren has been was in a home with two loving parents.” 
The tears flooded to Spencer’s eyes in a flash and he fought to keep them at bay. He rolled his lip violently between his teeth to try and stop them falling. 
He tried to speak a few times but the words wouldn’t come out. He closed his eyes. Took a deep breath. 
“What are, uh, what are my chances here?” He croaked. 
“I don’t know, Doctor Reid.” Jenny sighed. “I have no doubts you would be a great fit for some child out there but maybe…maybe don’t set your sights on Wren.” 
He opened his eyes again, the tears broke free. 
“I don’t want another child. It’s not just about having some child.” He suddenly stood up. “The moment I met her I felt an intrinsic need to protect her. She is special and she is wonderful and I…I feel like her dad, don’t you understand? I love her as if she were my flesh and blood. I don’t want a child, I want Wren.” 
Jenny inhaled sharply and pushed herself to her feet, slotting her notebook back in her bag. 
“I’m not saying it won’t happen, Doctor Reid. But you need to be prepared for the fact it might not.” She shook her head sadly. “We can pick this up later in the week ok? I’ll call you.” 
Spencer couldn’t get any words out to reply. He just stood there dumbly and watched the social worker leave. 
He watched her leave him alone in this house, this fucking suburban nightmare of a house that he’d only brought for the sake of Wren.
Wren who he’d promised he would look out for, who he promised he would bring home with him. And now that could all go up in smoke. 
His tears wouldn’t cease, like a never ending waterfall flowing down his face. 
The walls of this goddamn house suddenly felt so small. This house was the last place he wanted to be right now. 
Without much thought to where he was going, he grabbed his car keys before throwing open the front door and disappearing into the balmy spring afternoon. 
***
It was late when the jet touched down and so Emily sent you all home from the air strip telling you all paperwork could wait until the morning. 
You could barely keep your eyes open as you drove home, tired down to your bones. 
When you found a body slumped on the floor using your front door to prop them up right, you could have burst out laughing because this was just perfect. 
His shirt was wrinkled and his hair hung messily in his face. As you approached, he didn’t move, not even an inch. 
You frowned as you fished your keys out of your purse, clearing your throat but he didn’t look up. His head was flopped forward to his chest, hair obscuring most of his face.
“Spencer?” You spoke his name but received no response. “Spencer?” Still nothing. 
Goddamnit. 
“Spencer!” You kicked him firmly in the hip and he wobbled a little and then you heard a sharp intake of air.
His head shot back, his eyes suddenly wide open and staring at you like you’d woken him from a deep sleep. You most likely had. 
“Y/N?” He croaked, running his hand through his hair, eyebrows knitted in confusion. “W-where am I?” 
It was then you realised his bloodshot eyes, red raw and you knew it wasn’t just from crying. 
“Spencer, are you ok?” You swallowed, feeling your hands start to shake. 
“How did I get here?” He squinted at you. 
“I have no idea.” You reached out and grabbed him by the wrist, pulling him to his feet. 
He didn’t make it easy, he was like a led weight in your arms. He stumbled once he was up, falling against your door.
Your heart thrummed against your chest.
“Spencer,” you swallowed again. “Are you…are you high?” 
He averted his gaze to the floor, a symbol of guilt you knew all too well. But then he looked back at you and sighed.
“No.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “I appreciate that’s what it must look like. I’m…drunk. Really fucking drunk. Not high. I swear.” 
Oh thank god, you allowed yourself to breathe a sigh of relief. Half a sigh anyway.  
“That’s probably not much better though right? You don’t drink.” 
“True.” He nodded. “But if I didn’t drink I might have gotten high. I don’t even know how I ended up here. Or how long I’ve been here.” 
This seemed way over your head, a job for JJ or Emily, not you. You didn’t know how to handle this, you weren’t equipped for it. 
You knew about Spencer’s history with dilaudid, he’d told you he didn’t drink on your first date when you’d asked him what wine he wanted with dinner. He proceeded to tell you he didn’t drink because of his past addiction, he didn’t want to find himself dependent on something else again. 
But here he was, drunk. Drunk and telling you he’d thought about getting high. And you had no idea what to do. 
“Come inside.” You got your door open and helped him inside as he couldn’t walk in a straight line. You guided him with an arm around his waist to the couch where he fell down like a rag doll. “Should I call JJ? Emily?”
“No, p-please don’t.” He whined, his words slurring together. 
“Spencer, I don’t know that I’m the best person to handle this. Do you need a meeting or something?” 
“I haven’t been to a m-meeting in over ten years.” He slurred again. 
You had to strain yourself to understand him, all his sentences sounding like one long word. You sat down on the coffee table in front of him and sighed. 
“Why did you drink? Why did you want to get high?” Maybe you could help if you understood why. Probably not, but it was worth a shot. 
He ran his fingers through his tangled hair, sweeping it back off of his face. It struck you then how old he suddenly looked, like he’d somehow aged thirty years since you’d last seen him. 
“I…my social worker…she thinks…” his sentence was punctuated with heaving breaths, as though trying to stop himself breaking down into tears. “I might not be able to a-adopt Wren.” 
Ah, so that’s what this was about. 
The last time you’d seen him you’d argued over this exact thing. So why of all people were you the one he’d come to? 
“I see.” You didn’t know what to say if truth be told. Thankfully he continued. 
“She grew up in a t-two person household. J-Jenny thinks it's more likely they will place her in a home with two p-parents.” It was the most coherent he’d been, which was good. But he sounded so unbelievably sad. “I get it. I do. I w-want what’s best for her…but w-what if that’s not what’s best for m-me?” 
You felt your heart ripping in two. It was painfully obvious how much this girl meant to him and you hated seeing him this way. Again you didn’t need to speak as he carried on. 
“It’s ironic, you know? The only reason I even w-want to adopt is because I can’t h-hold down a relationship, c-can’t seem to find someone to have my own family with. And now it m-might be the reason I can’t adopt.” His breathing grew really frantic and you could see the tears welling in his eyes. 
You really did hate that he was going through this. You leant forward and placed a gentle hand on his knee.
“I really wish I knew what to say.” You whispered. “I really am so sorry Spencer. I know I was less than thrilled with the idea but I can see how much she means to you.” 
“Just wanted to take my mind o-off of it.” He mumbled. “Just needed to forget. Wanted to get high, for the f-first time in years. Didn’t though. I didn’t.” 
“I know. I’m proud of you.” You gave his knee a squeeze. “But getting drunk isn’t going to help anything, you know that right?” 
“Yes.” He sniffed. “Just wanted to forget.” 
Suddenly he jerked forward, his large hands gripping the sides of your face and tugging you closer until his lips slammed against yours. 
He tasted like whisky. Whisky and tears. 
You were so gobsmacked for a moment you let him kiss you. But once your brain caught up to what was happening, you quickly pushed him away.
“What are you doing?” You frowned at him. 
His eyes widened as the realisation of his stupidity washed over him and he stumbled up to his feet. 
“Oh my god.” He shook his head frantically. “What am I doing? I’m so sorry, I should…should go…” 
His shaky legs tried to carry him to the door but you managed to jump up and grab his wrist before he could get too far. 
When he looked back at you his cheeks were bright red with his embarrassment and he struggled to look you in the eye. 
“Don’t go.” You spoke softly. “I can’t let you roam the streets in this state. Stay, you can sleep on the couch. We’ll forget that ever happened.” 
He pulled a face like he might argue with you and maybe if he hadn’t had so much to drink he may have. 
But god knows where else he could end up with the alcohol clouding his brain, he was sure he hadn’t meant to come here in the first place. 
He exhaled and nodded slowly, moving away from the door and further into your apartment. 
“I really am sorry about Wren. But it’s not over, Spencer. You have to try and stay positive. For her.” You whispered before you turned away to gather blankets for your ex’s drunken stay on your couch. 
***
In the morning you found your couch empty, blankets and pillows piled neatly at one end and a small scrap of note paper on top. 
In Spencer’s chicken scratch handwriting you read: 
Thank you for last night. I thought it best I leave before you wake up. I am absolutely mortified about my actions. I should have known better even in the state I was in. 
I’m sorry for putting you in that position and for making you feel as though you had to let me stay. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable. 
I’m sorry for everything. 
Spencer. 
Everything; he was sorry for everything. 
Sorry for blurting out that he wanted a family? Sorry for reacting the way he did when you told him you weren’t ready? Sorry for calling whatever the two of you had a waste of time? Sorry for diving head first into adopting a little girl without telling you? 
You folded up the note and hid it away in your nightstand. You considered calling him but you were fairly certain he wouldn’t pick up. 
You made coffee and ate breakfast, all the while Spencer’s heartbreak over potentially losing that little girl was weighing on you. 
There had to be something you could do to help him. Anything. You would do anything for him. 
You took your coffee over to the desk and booted up your laptop. Even as your fingers were hovering over the keys, you weren’t sure why exactly you were doing this. 
Other than the fact you hated to see Spencer so sad. 
***
It was deep into the month of June when Spencer was allowed to take Wren out of the halfway home for the first time. 
Jenny accompanied them but assured him she was just here to supervise and she wouldn’t get involved. 
He’d tried to remain positive, the fact they were allowing him to still see her, to take her out of the home surely meant all was not lost? Maybe he still had a chance to be her father. 
The first place Wren wanted to go was for ice cream. He told her they could go anywhere she wanted and she wanted ice cream. 
So he took her for ice cream. 
She couldn’t decide what she wanted so he brought her seven different little cups of seven different flavours. She ate each one with a smile on her face and apparently each one was better than the last. 
Hopped up on sugar, he took her to the park. She held his hand as they walked and hers was so tiny in his. It made his heart soar, spiralling up into the atmosphere and blanketing him in a warmth he’d never felt before. 
He pushed her on the swing set while she giggled and screamed to go higher. He caught her in his arms at the bottom of the slide which she went down twenty two times. 
And each of the twenty two times he caught her, wrapping her small body in his arms, picking her up and spinning her around causing more laughter to erupt from her. And each time when he placed her back on her feet she screamed, again! 
He held her little waist while she attempted the jungle gym, not having the upper body strength to hold herself up. 
Once he settled her back on the ground and asked her what she wanted to do next. Her expressive eyes wandered the park, the little cogs in her brain turning while she tried to make a decision. 
But then something horrible happened. 
When her eyes finally landed back on Spencer, he saw the tears behind them a split second before they started falling. Her bottom lip pouted and her small frame started to shake violently. 
“Wren?” Spencer immediately knelt in front of her in the grass and placed his hands on her shoulders. 
She was vibrating, sniffing dramatically and shaking her head, curls bouncing as she did so. 
“Wren, what’s wrong?” He felt his heart shattering as he looked at her. 
“I want to go home!” She screamed, so loudly Spencer was sure he felt an ear drum burst.
Before he could reply she had pulled herself out of his grip, turned away and started running as fast as her legs would carry her. 
“I want to go home!” She screeched as she went. 
Spencer pushed himself up and suddenly Jenny was at his side. He barely registered her until she spoke. 
“What happened?” She asked almost accusingly. 
“I have no idea.” He shook his head, not taking his eyes off of Wren who was running towards the tree line at the edge of the park. “Let me go, I’ll find out what’s wrong.”
He didn’t wait for Jenny to reply before he took off running after her. Spencer had never relished running or any kind of physical exertion. In his time with the BAU he’d avoided it at all costs. 
But right now he didn’t care. He would run to the ends of the Earth if he had to just to find Wren. Thankfully he didn’t have to. 
He found the small raven haired girl collapsed at the trunk of a large tree, legs drawn up to her chest and she sobbed into the fabric of her cream coloured leggings. 
Her cries were so loud, so gut wrenching that he could have burst into tears just from the sound. She looked utterly helpless and Spencer wanted to wrap her in his arms and shield her from all the bad in the world. 
But he wasn’t so sure that’s what she wanted. 
He approached her with caution, not wanting to startle her. When he reached her, he dropped to the grass in front of her on his knees. Slowly he reached out and brushed her tangled curls behind her ear. 
“Pumpkin, what’s wrong?” He whispered soothingly, hooking his finger under her chin and raising her head so he could look at her. 
Those electrifying green eyes were made almost blindingly bright by her tears. 
“The lady,” she sniffed, lips still pouted. “The lady by the swing set. She looked like my mommy.” 
Fuck. 
He felt a lump form in his throat. Sometimes she was so happy and upbeat it was easy for him to forget what had happened to her parents. She was so brave, so strong, but he couldn’t imagine the kind of inner turmoil she battled with everyday. 
“Oh, Wren. I’m so sorry.” He started to brush away her tears but she surprised him when she huffed and shoved his hand off of her face. 
“Stop it.” She frowned at him. “I want to go home!” 
“Wren,” he tried to ignore the pain of having her push him away. “We’ve talked about this. You said you understood that you couldn’t go home.” 
“I don’t care!” She yelled, slamming her little fists in the dirt. “I want to go home! I want my mommy and daddy!”
Spencer felt a presence somewhere behind them, he knew it was Jenny. He hoped she’d let him handle this. 
“Wren, I know this must be hard for you…” he trailed off when the little girl pushed herself to her feet. Spencer stayed on his knees. 
“I want my mommy and daddy!” She screamed at the top of her small lungs.  
“I know you do, pumpkin but-”
“Stop calling me pumpkin.” She huffed again, stamping her foot. 
“I thought…I thought you liked me calling you pumpkin?” His chest tightened, his heart breaking. 
“Well I don’t.” She folded her arms dramatically over her chest, stomped her foot again.
“Ok, that’s ok. I won’t call you it anymore if you don’t like it.” He spoke softly, he hoped calmly. 
“I don’t like you.” She suddenly spat, eyes sad and eyebrows knitted together. 
The pain that shot to his heart hearing those words was like nothing Spencer had ever experienced before. It was as though she had taken her tiny fist and punched him straight in the chest with a force much stronger than herself. 
The air left his lungs, the wind leaving his sails. The hurt caused by those four words was far worse than getting shot, worse than being beaten by Hankel, or the beatings he’d received in prison. Even worse than the mental and emotional anguish of watching Maeve die. 
Her words were like a knife, cutting and ripping at his flesh, slicing him open and leaving him completely raw. 
“W-Wren…” he choked out, his pain evident in his voice. “I know you’re sad but please don’t say that. It’s not a very nice thing to say.”
“I don’t care!” She screamed again. “I hate you! You’re not my daddy. I want my daddy!” 
She grew hysteric after that, sobbing so frantically nothing she said made sense anymore. He tried to comfort her, to hold her, but she pushed him away each time. 
Eventually he glanced over his shoulder where Jenny was in fact standing and looked forlornly at her from the ground. 
She stepped closer tentatively and crouched next to the screeching child. 
“It’s ok Wren, let’s get you back to the home.” She was able to put her arm around Wren without being pushed away and the little girl buried against her. “I’m sorry Doctor Reid but I need to take her back. I’ll call you tomorrow, ok?” 
Both adults raised to their feet at the same time, Spencer’s tears filled eyes meeting those of the social worker. 
“I…I…” he looked back at Wren who was clinging to Jenny like he was some kind of terrifying monster. He wanted to argue but he could risk further upsetting her. “O-ok.” 
He stood dumbly and watched as Jenny led Wren back across the park. His tears started to fall despite himself and he curled his arms around his body, hugging himself tightly. 
All he wanted in the world was for Wren to be happy. But if she wasn’t happy with him, how did he even begin to be happy without her? 
***
“Thank you for coming with me. I’m sorry I keep dragging you into this.” Spencer averted his gaze to the sidewalk as he ambled along. 
You strolled next to him, curiously watching the side of his face as you sipped your coffee. 
When he’d called you this evening you’d been at the BAU finishing up some paperwork. You hadn’t seen or heard from him since the night he showed up drunk at your apartment and you were surprised to see his name flashing on your phone screen. 
His tone had been frantic down the phone, you only managed to catch every few words. 
Wren hates me. Fucked up. Want to use. 
You managed to get him to calm for long enough to tell you where he was. When you’d hurried to Emily’s office your fear must have been written on your face as all you’d needed to say was, I have to go, Spencer… and she was motioning you out of the door. 
You found him where he’d said he’d be, on a park bench with a bottle of whiskey concealed in a paper bag. 
It was unopened. Small miracles. 
He didn’t tell you what was wrong, instead he asked you to follow him. And you did without question. 
He led you to an old community centre and once inside you understood why. 
You sat and listened as he spoke to the room at Beltway Clean Cops of everything that had happened, right up until this afternoon when Wren had screamed that she hated him and didn’t want him as her dad. 
He told them how he had never wanted to use so badly in over ten years and how he’d gotten drunk a little while ago to stop him getting high. 
Afterwards he left and you followed him again. 
He brought you coffee at a nearby cafe and the two of you walked in the DC night side by side. That was the first time he’d spoken since he addressed the room at Beltway. 
“I’m glad you called actually. I’ve been worried about you.” You kept your eyes on his face but he wouldn’t look at you. “She’s been traumatised, Spence. It sounds like she’s been brave up until now but you and I both know that kind of trauma has to be dealt with eventually. I may not know her but I’m certain she didn’t mean what she said.” 
“What if she did?” His hand tightened around his coffee cup. “What the hell am I supposed to do?”
“You need to give her time, that's all you can do. She needs to feel what happened to her so she can start to move past it.” You wished you had a better answer. 
“So I’m just supposed to wait? I can’t do that, I have to do something.” 
You reached for him, touching the back of his free hand. He slowed to a stop and you did the same. Finally his eyes flit up to you. 
“You know the Serenity Prayer, right? They use it in drug rehabilitation.” You kept your hand on his, he didn’t seem to mind. 
“Of course I do.” He frowned a little. 
“I know you’re not religious, but I need you to say it with me. I need you to hear it.” You turned his hand over so you could hold it. 
He looked like he might argue, huffing out a breath before he rolled his eyes. 
“Fine.” He agreed although clearly not happily. 
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” You spoke in time with one another, keeping eye contact as you did so. 
“You have to grant your own serenity, Spencer. You have to accept that you can’t change some things no matter how much you want to. I know it’s hard, but some things are out of your control.” You went to remove your hand from his but he surprised you by keeping a firm hold on you. 
“I don’t know what I’d do without you.” He spoke quietly, his eyebrows still knitted together. “You’re the wind beneath my wings, keeping me airborne when I feel like I might start free falling. You’re…you’re my favourite person in the whole goddamn world.”
“And you’re mine.” You smiled at him, squeezing his hand. “I want this to work out for you but if it doesn’t, you have to be able to bounce back. You just have to.” 
“I know.” He agreed with a nod. “Thank you Y/N.”
He let go of your hand but was quickly wrapping his arm around you, pulling you close to his chest. In turn you wrapped your free arm around him too and you held each other tightly. 
“You’ll be ok Spencer. I’m sure of it.” You whispered against his shirt. 
“I hope so.” He nodded, inhaling the scent of your hair. “Can I…can I call you tomorrow after I’ve spoken to Jenny? Good or bad?” 
You lifted your head so you could look at him, a gentle smile on your lips. 
“You can call me any time, Spencer. I mean it.”
You noticed the way his eyes grazed over your lips and you thought he might kiss you. And this time you might have let him.
He wanted to kiss you, he almost kissed you, but he knew it wasn’t fair on either of you. You were one of those things he needed the serenity to accept he couldn’t change. 
He swallowed thickly and stepped back from your hold, awkwardly scratching at the back of his neck. 
“Can I walk you to your car?” He asked, eyes once again on the sidewalk.
“Sure.” You nodded and soon the two of you fell in step again and neither of you spoke until you said your goodbyes at your vehicle. 
You drove away knowing you had to do more. You’d already started making provisions, taking steps in order to help your most favourite person. But you needed to do more. 
And you needed to do it fast. 
***
The following day Jenny called him and asked him to come to the halfway home. He was nervous, having no idea what to expect when he got there. 
It wasn’t Jenny that met him in the day room though, it was Wren. 
She had her curly hair in pigtails and she wore a cute pair of denim overalls with a polka dot shirt underneath. She had a shy smile on her lips, one hand clutching Rover by the ear and the other held a sheet of paper. 
“Hi Wren,” Spencer cautiously stepped closer to her, wanting to give her space. 
She proffered the paper towards him without a word, which he took and scrutinised. 
On one half of the page was another of her crayon drawings, this one depicting a small dark-haired child cuddling an extremely tall man, taller than the trees he was standing next to. 
On the other in orange crayon was a note, every word spelled correctly, he wasn’t sure if she was just that smart or if she had help. It didn’t matter much either way, what mattered were the words themself. 
To: Spencer
From: Wren
I’m sorry for being mean to you. I don’t hate you and I still want to live with you in the pretty house. I miss my mommy and daddy but I still want us to be a family.
He felt the tears filling his eyes before he reached the end and once he’d read it through a handful of times he looked back up at Wren who waited patiently for him to finish. 
“You’re sure?” His voice cracked, betraying him. 
“Yes.” She nodded, pigtails bouncing, 
“Come here,” he sniffed, holding his arms open for her to make the first move.
She was quick to come closer, falling into Spencer and wrapping her small arms around his waist while he enveloped her in a tight embrace. 
“God I love you kiddo.” He blurted out, as she snuggled against him. He’d never told her that before, always too scared of what a five year olds reaction would be to that.
She squeezed him as tight as she was able, nuzzling her head into his stomach.
“I love you, Spencer.” She replied and Spencer felt the pieces of his shattered heart fall back into place. “And I do like it when you call me pumpkin.”
Spencer held her tighter still, feeling as though his chest could explode with love. He bowed his head and kissed her curls. 
“Ok, pumpkin,” he whispered into her wild hair. “You want me to read to you while I’m here?” 
“Yes please.” She nodded, pulling back from his arms. 
She soon started running away, over towards the couch they usually occupied how he read to her. He glanced down at the piece of paper in his hands and smiled. 
If it was the last thing he did, he was bringing this little girl home. 
***
July came and went in a blur of home visits, parental training, family profile meetings and days out with Wren and Jenny. 
August came and Spencer felt positive. With each passing day he was getting closer and closer to being able to finally bring Wren home. 
But just as quickly as he’d gotten his hopes up, they were dashed again, leaving Spencer spiralling towards a dark abyss with no way to break his fall.
“I’m sorry, could you repeat that?” Spencer stared at Jenny across his coffee table, his mug of tea wobbling in his shaky hands. 
Jenny inhaled, sitting back in the armchair and crossing one leg over the other. 
“I said there’s a young couple who have taken a liking to Wren. They’ve expressed interest in pursuing adoption. They’re already approved, done their home studies and training. They’d just been waiting for the right child.” Jenny braced herself, waited for the doctor's reaction. 
“They’ve met her?” He swallowed.
“Yes, they adore her.” Jenny told him somewhat morosely.
“And Wren?” 
“She seemed to like them.” Jenny smiled sadly at him.
“So, uh, it’s over? Just like that?” The tears misted his eyes but he managed to keep them at bay. 
He recited the serenity prayer in his head like a mantra. 
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
“It’s not over, Doctor Reid. And if you wish to still pursue your adoption you are well within your right to. But you’re entitled to know what’s going on and I’ve said before-”
“The state will be more likely inclined to place her in an environment similar to where she came from. Two parents instead of one.” His voice was monotone, not an ounce of emotion to it. 
“I’m afraid so.” 
Spencer wanted to cry. He wanted to laugh. He wanted to scream and break something. He wanted to drink or take dilaudid. 
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change. 
“O-ok.” He croaked. 
“Ok?” Jenny frowned at him, clearly expecting him to put up more of a fight. 
“I want what’s best for Wren above all else. Maybe two parents can give her more than I can.” He choked back a sob. “I’ll keep fighting for her, to the bitter end. But if it doesn’t work in my favour there’s nothing I can do, right? I have to accept the things I can’t change.” 
“For what it’s worth,” Jenny pushed herself to her feet. “I’m rooting for you. But there’s only so much I can do.” 
“Thank you.” He stood as well. 
He saw her out and padded back to the couch, running his fingers through his tangled hair. 
It was only then he realised how exhausted he was. These last few months had taken everything out of him, physically and mentally. He’d continue to go through the motions in the hopes this might end in his favour but honestly, he couldn’t keep fighting the way he had been. 
He loved Wren, with every beat of his heart. But perhaps it wasn’t meant to be. Maybe he was never supposed to have a family.
He grabbed his phone and typed out a quick text, hit send and closed his eyes. 
Before he could succumb to sleep, there was a knock at his green front door. 
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@ultragirrl @wittlewowa @bxtchopolis @coldheartedmar
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thatbanditqueen · 1 month
Text
Come Hell or Come Sundown
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A Charro! One-Shot
Summary: It is the summer of 1968 and Elvis finds himself in a New Hollywood, no more production code, just a ratings system with the promise of more sex and violence. This is good, because Elvis is in transition too! He is hot off the set of his TV special and ready to make a gritty western he can be proud of. Things are going well, he's making friends on location in Arizona, but then first they cut some of the violence, and now he's not so sure there is going to be any sex scenes in this movie. What's next, are they going to make him sing to his horse?
Inspired by the cut nude bath scene and the notes in Donna Lewis' diary that there were originally sex scenes scripted in Charro!
A response to the writing prompt: "Cowboy Elvis"
Warnings: References to past sexual harassment, minor drug use implied and kissing.
WC: 13.4K
Thanks to my lovely writing support group @vintageshanny @ellie-24 @be-my-ally @lookingforrainbows @from-memphis-with-love @missmaywemeetagain @shakerattlescroll @peskybedtime and to @whositmcwhatsit for alpha-ing most of this. It is been a crazy two months, I won't go into it, but if you are still reading my stuff let me know it.
July 29, 1968
Apacheland Arizona
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Ina leaned against the back side of the sound stage listening to the cactus wren sing their sunrise melody for the desert. Off in the brush she saw a lizard scurry away. It was early, but the air was already beginning to heat up and hung there thick with promise. She took a sip of her coffee, savoring the light, sweet taste, her heart full of hopeful anticipation for the sweet day ahead. 
She ran her fingers down over her blouse, enjoying the smooth empty feeling underneath where round flesh had been a month ago. 
This picture had been the answer to her prayers, a sign that she could still land a part as the love interest role. It was a role she knew well, one she had been playing for ten years in vehicles designed to showcase male stars: John Wayne, Paul Newman, Jerry Lewis, and now Elvis. Ina rarely got a leading role in a picture focused on a couple or a strong female character, but she accepted it was still a good salary and it kept her busy on and off between modeling gigs.
Lately, however, the on and off had been more off, and her agent, Mickey, had started talking about auditioning for roles as older sisters, aunts, and even, gasp, mothers.
But then she got this and bam! She had knocked over her phone with excitement as Mickey  described this project as a “modern, gritty western.”  She’d even agreed to the nudity, accepting her agent’s advice that this was going to open up even more doors now that the production code was gone and the film industry had a new rating system that allowed for mature content.
The first American western with a sex scene. That’s how Chuck, this director, had pitched his script in their first meeting, while also assuring her it would be tasteful and artistic and mainly shot using her facial expressions. She hadn’t cared, signing anywhere they wanted if it meant staving off cinematic spinsterhood for as long as possible.
And then, after carefully examining every dimple in her bottom that night, Ina had launched into a month-long disciplined regimen of ballet classes, black beauties and one meal a day. Ina took a deep breath and inhaled the earthy, floral aroma of the Arizona desert, letting it fill her with confidence. Her tummy was svelte, her skin glowed with a healthy bronze tan, and she was ready to conquer the shoot ahead. She had a feeling about this picture. A good one. 
Hollywood was buzzing about the TV special Elvis had just finished shooting. Apparently it was raw and gritty and unvarnished, just like the script for this film. And Chuck, her director, was the king of the westerns, who had been promoting Charro! in the trade press as Peckinpah meets Leone with more sex appeal and heart. 
Ina looked out at the orange glow of the desert sky at sunrise one last time as she stomped out her cigarette butt and murmured to herself with hushed excitement.
“What a glorious start to a glorious day.”
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She headed back inside and made her way around the back of the set where she bumped into Elvis’ stunt double and friend, Jerry. Ina grinned, she couldn’t help it, Jerry’s serious eyes and rugged shoulders made her heart skip a beat. 
“That was some party last night, huh?” 
Jerry looked down, his low chuckle heavy with the weight of words unspoken as they both reflected on the prior evening. Ina was sure she saw an echo of her own desire in the warmth dancing behind Jerry’s blue eyes.
“You should talk, Sandy Koufax. Charlie’s grateful he can still see.”
Ina gulped, covering her mouth.. “ Oh no! Is he really hurt? I felt so bad, I was aiming for his stomach.” Ina said, twirling her hair. “Although I didn’t feel nearly as bad after watching Elvis go after Alan with the whole bucket, intentionally, over and over. He really took it to the next level.”
“Oh, that’s just how the bossman lets off steam.”
“That’s one way to put it. Say, where is the old steam engine, anyway?”
“He just went out front to get some dirt on his clothes.”
Ina raised her eyebrow. 
“He wants to make sure he has that real cowboy look.”
“Huh, Elvis Strasberg. Who knew?” 
Ina thought of Elvis out rolling around in the dirt and tried not to giggle. This got harder and harder as she looked into Jerry’s eyes, which were also twinkling with amusement.
In a moment of vulnerability Ina decided to let down her guard and step closer, trailing her fingers over Jerry’s upper arm. His muscle flinched slightly under her hand and it made her feel a little flight of butterflies in her tummy. 
“Too bad,” she murmured in what she hoped was a sexy, flirtatious voice.  “I was beginning to hope maybe you’d have to step in for him today.”
Jerry’s eyes widened for a split second, as he ran his hand through his hair. “Uh, well, as far as I know his scenes today aren’t dangerous at all.”
“That’s what you think.” Ina smiled, walking backwards for a few steps to enjoy the slight blush coloring Jerry’s scruffy cheeks.
She couldn’t be sure, but she felt there was a spark between them, and it made her feel young and giddy. Fifteen years of having her body and self worth surveyed and scrutinized and picked apart had left Ina unsure of her seduction abilities. First it had been photographers and advertising executives, then producers and directors had joined the throng out to shatter her confidence. For some women, the brutality of the business helped them create a calloused, impenetrable outer shell and distorted sense of self worth. For Ina, it had done the opposite, and she frowned as she felt the familiar knot of insecurity tighten in her stomach and vowed not let her self doubt stop her from having fun this time. No, before the end of this shoot she’d get Jerry alone and find out if he was as quiet and soft spoken in bed as he was on set.
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Twenty minutes later, Ina was still smiling to herself when she slunk into a chair in make-up and pulled her thick, terry cotton robe tighter around her body. 
“Look at you,” Bertie gushed as she toyed with Ina’s long, brown hair. “Excited for the scenes today?”
Ina paused and looked at herself in the mirror, letting out a nervous sigh. 
“As ready as I’ll ever be.” 
She awkwardly smiled up at Bertie, and told herself to relax even as her shoulders inadvertently rolled upward and she tugged at the hem of her robe.
“You know five, even three years ago, you would kiss, passionately, then the camera would pan to the bedside table and come back into focus with you smoking. But now, Blow Up, Bonnie & Clyde, the new rating system. It’s a whole new ball game out there. I’m not sure - “
“Oh, you’re gonna be fine.”
Ina looked down and studied the top of her cleavage, she felt strangely ambivalent about the nudity and the sex scenes they were shooting. She was proud that they wanted her to do them, it bolstered her self esteem and made her feel longed for and desired, special. But she couldn’t shake that nagging feeling deep down that she would get on set, bare it all and then have the director and DP exchange hushed whispers before pulling her off and recasting her role. She met her own gaze again in the mirror and tried to squelch her self doubt.
“I know, I know, and it’s all very tasteful. I trust Chuck. Still, I’m the one wearing a see-through robe. All Elvis has to do is take off his cowboy hat before he carries me to the bed. He might be shirtless in the second scene, but for the most part all we’ll see is a little bit of his ear.”
Bertie nodded into big rounds of hair she was smoothing over with oil and pinning into place with bobby pins lodged at the side of her mouth.
“Yeah, well, with most guys I’d be fine just seeing the ear, cuz women’s bodies are just more beautiful. But with Elvis, I kinda wished they’d have him nude too, you know?” She clicked her tongue and winked at Ina in the mirror,
“You should get Betty Friedan on that, it would really be a movement for sex equality. Though I bet he’d give you a private show if you asked him, Bertie. He’s making his way through the crew, two at a time I hear.”
Bertie wiggled her eyebrows into the mirror.
“Yeah, I heard about that, two of the pretty Mexican extras, right? They can have him, I just want to look at him. I don’t think I’d survive if he touched me.” She flipped her long red hair over her shoulder and bit her lip. “I don’t know how you are going to make love to him all day.”
“Oh, well, when it’s work, you sort of detach yourself. I mean, yes, Elvis is very handsome, but he doesn’t really send me, you know? You should have seen him last night with his guys. Like a pack of wild animals.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, I think Jerry is the only one who has ever opened a book, or doesn’t eat with his hands.”
Ina tried not to move as she watched Bertha pin another round hair piece in place. 
“The stunt double? He sure has that silent type thing going for him.” Bertie squinted her eyes at Ina as she stuck a few more pins in. “Ahhhh, let me guess, that’s the type you go for. Over Elvis. Are you telling me that you wouldn’t, you know, play patty cake with Elvis if he made the move? I thought he always dated his leading lady, maybe those extras are just the appetizer before the main dish..”
Ina sat up, admiring the tower of rolled hair Bertie had constructed on top of her head. Satisfied, she leveled Bertie with a friendly but stern look.
“Things can get sticky when you bed your co-star. And giving in just encourages them. You shoulda seen Jerry Lewis trailing me around off set like a creep. like I owed it to him.” 
Ina grimaced, remembering Lewis’ sweaty brow as he had pushed her against the wall of her dressing room and promised that she’d like it, that she didn’t know what she was missing. She shuddered, thinking of him and all the others: the photographers who’d grinded into her as they straddled over her during a photo shoot. The producers who had invited her to an audition and then cornered her alone. She felt sick to her stomach and reached out for the random half drunk bottle of Coke on the vanity in front of her to wash away the bad taste in her mouth.
“You ok, Miss Balin?”
“Please Bertie, call me Ina. After that party last night I think we’re all on a first name basis.”
“Ha, yeah, I guess.” She turned Ina around to finish her make up. “You know, I think you might be the only woman here who doesn’t want to sleep with Elvis.”
“Thank god Elvis seems to be somewhat of a gentleman, because I’m not looking to be another notch on his belt, I’ve worked too hard to stay in this business without a casting couch reputation, and I plan to keep it that way. Plus, with all the bed hopping that happens on location, and then having to run scenes together if things get, you know, weird. Better to keep things professional between us.”
“On the other hand, a lonely stunt man...”
Ina winked, she could feel the giddy excitement bubble up just thinking of Jerry. She tried to stifle it and stay aloof as she spoke.
“A month is a long time, even a lonely stuntman deserves some company.”
A cough interrupted their giggles and the women turned to see Elvis leaning against the doorway, one hand on his belt. He squinted his eyes, looking at them with exaggerated suspicion as he wiped his hand over his forehead leaving a dark streak of dirt above his brow.
“Uh huh, and just what’d I stumble into here, huh? You two look like you are up ta no good, boy, I tell ya what.”
Perfectly lined smoky eyes sat below Elvis’ dirty forehead and more dirt billowed off his trousers as he strode toward the two women, his hands hanging off the top of his corduroy trousers. Bertie shot Ina a cautious glance in the mirror that warned her not to laugh, even as  the sides of her lips seemed to hold back a chuckle.
“I’ve seen that look before Iny Niny.” Elvis said. “Right about the moment ya took aim and fired at poor Charlie Hodge, square the eyes.”
“I really didn’t mean to hurt him! Really.” Something about Elvis’ easy charm made it impossible not to smile broadly. “I - we - we’re not up to anything, you. Just chit chat. I was saying how I almost didn’t recognize you when I got here yesterday. On account of that beard you got, Presley.”
“I almost don’t recognize myself, honey.” He paused and looked in the mirror, taking a step closer as he rubbed the dirt into his forehead more. “That’s probably a good thing, maybe this picture actually has a chance to be something.”
Ina sat up as Bertie dusted her with a last round of hair spray and swiveled her chair around to face him. 
“Oh, now don’t say that, there’s a reason you’re the star here. I love your movies.”
Ina may not have actually seen them all, but she knew of Elvis’ desire to be in more serious dramas. It was a common topic of conversation in Hollywood when his name came up. Ok, well, one of the common topics. Maybe not as common as his reputation for fucking his costars, she mused to herself, but still, as someone who had even less clout to be picky about projects, she sympathized with that ever present double bind of needing the money, not wanting to be seen as difficult, and yet, also yearning for more creative fulfillment.
Their eyes met and he nodded to himself, pursing his lips, as if he were reading her mind,
“Huh, so you're the one.” He grinned and took his cowboy hat off, running his hand through his hair as he tried to fill the awkward silence. “Well, sorry but I can’t issue you a refund, Iner Niner. All I can promise is that this ‘un will be better than some of the stinkers, I reckon.”
Ina smiled big, thinking of the desert sunrise this morning, all the good omens. “I don’t know if I would ever describe an Elvis film as a stinker. But I do have a good feeling about this film.” 
Elvis scratched his beard, a naughty blush lighting up his cheeks as he took in the very sheer negligee peeking out from under her white terry cloth robe. 
“Huh, feeling better and better the more I look- I mean listen to you, INy”
Ina felt a chill up her spine as she looked into Elvis’ dancing eyes, lingering on his face with newfound appreciation. There was something about the way the stubbly beard he had grown out for this role accentuated his jawline and made him seem more rugged, more handsome than he had looked when he played the polished romantic lead in his previous films. She felt a flutter of something unfamiliar stir in her belly; she had never been gaga over Elvis before. 
And you are not now, she told herself, it’s just the characters and the scenes you know you are shooting today. Besides, he flirts with everyone, why he’d been flirting with you and every woman in the bar last night even when he had one or two extras on his lap. 
Elvis arched his eyebrow, and Ina pulled her robe closer with a nervous laugh.
“Yeah, I think you’re gonna be seeing a lot more of me today.” She chuckled. “I was just telling Bertie I remembered when all I had to do to film a sex scene was lead a cowboy into my wigwam, and let the camera cut to smoke coming out of the top. We left the rest to the audience’s imagination.”
“Yeah, I think I remember that one.” Elvis whistled as he plopped into the make-up chair next to her.  “Well, don’t worry, we’re only gotta pretend to make love with an audience of a hundred or so crew members watching, so no pressure.”
They laughed nervously, and then one of the production assistants peered around the door and called to Ina that the DP was ready to work out the lighting for her fully nude bath scene. She stood and gave Elvis a friendly pat, smiling inwardly as she looked over her shoulder to see Bertie trying to wipe the dirt off his forehead. 
“See you out there in the ring, Presley.”
“Ok,” he smiled.
Ina studied him for another beat, wondering if the way his beard framed his lips made them look even bigger and more luscious, but she couldn’t be sure.
Striding from the building with wardrobe and dressings back to the soundstage, Ina considered how Elvis had managed to meet and completely defy her expectations. She had never seen him at awards shows, premieres or parties, nor ran into him around town or at the studio canteens. Indeed,he had a reputation for keeping to himself in Hollywood. All she knew was the second hand information she got from people who had worked with him and the Hollywood rumor mill. There were so many contradictory descriptions of him that no, she had not known what to expect when she arrived in Arizona and discovered an Elvis she barely recognized under the scruffy beard he’d grown.
When Chuck, the director, had brought her over to introduce them, he had been shy and sweet, sheepishly sticking out his hand with an affected deep “Hullo, I’m Elvis Presley.” But then by the end of the rehearsals yesterday they had become more comfortable with each other. Something about kissing Elvis inbetween jokes she knew he was making to make her feel at ease had broken the ice between them. And he had started in with the nicknames almost immediately, helping to bring her into the camaraderie that had been established with the crew before her arrival. 
The run through yesterday had gone well, all jokes aside, and he had shown himself to be respectful and kind, never pushing or trying anything when they were in each other's arms. It’s probably good that he’s sleeping with some of the extras, Ina thought to herself. That way there would be no pent up sexual expectations and she could just focus on being a professional and perhaps even friends with Elvis. 
Yes, she could be friends with him. Ina had only been in Apacheland for a little over 24 hours, but she could tell from Elvis’ warmth that they had established a solid rapport and chemistry for their roles. She felt as safe as she could with him as she readied herself for her first nude role on film.
“Today is going to be a good day,” Ina repeated to herself as she opened the door and entered the sound stage.
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Ina was walking along the corridor behind the set when she heard Jerry’s voice on the other side of the plywood and hurried to catch him and flirt a little more. But then he said her name and she stopped, listening, as she realized he was speaking with one of Elvis’ other friends. It sounded like Charlie.
“I saw y’all. Why, she had her hands all over you, ya big stud. You really ain’t gonna try to bury the hatchet in that briar patch?”
“Oh, you know how Crazy can be. All I did was apologize to Alma and Flor for blocking the doorway last night and he ‘bout split in two. I ain’t about to try no funny business with his leading lady.”
“But you heard him call her Groucho, said he could barely stand to kiss her with that mustache above her lip. Said she was so manly, you could almost mistake her for one a the cowboy extras in drag. Like a goddamn drag queen who forgot to shave, is what he said.”
Ina felt the blood drain from her face and she began to tremble, tracing her fingers above her smooth upper lip, the one she diligently waxed every two weeks. They might as well have punched her in the gut with a steel two by four. She could almost taste something metallic at the back of her throat, where a lump formed.Tears threatened to spill from her eyes, and it took all her willpower to push them back as she stood there paralyzed while Jerry and Charlie chatted away.
“Aw, well he was off his rocker, she isn’t nearly as bad as that dog from continuity he had in his room at NBC, you know, with the big knockers?”
“Nah, I think In-ahhs pretty cute myself. If she’d been pawing my chest I’d be on that like white on rice, man.”
“Heard you like drag queens, Hodges.”
“Aw naw man, see, now that ain’t fair. Sides, that’s Lamar.”
The busy sound of the crew talking and moving around the sound stage echoed up into the lights with Charlie and Jerry’s laughter, but Ina could hardly hear anything except the pounding of her heart through her whole body. Air. She needed air. Ina hurried out a side door, her mind was racing and there was no way she could stomach the idea of filming a sex scene with Elvis now. Jerry and Charlie’s words had fractured the fragile veneer of confidence she had spent the last month building up. Dieting, ballet classes, early nights, slathering her face in cold cream and plunging it in ice first thing in the morning, staying away from alcohol and ice cream. She had worked so hard to get to a place where she had been able to look in the mirror and tell herself she could do this. Now all her self doubt had returned tenfold. 
Facing the desert, she lit a cigarette and muttered under her breath, her voice cracking as tears rolled down her cheeks.
“Oh god oh god, why did I take this role? Why do I embarrass myself again and again?”
Ina pressed her hand to her throat as she sucked in deeply, willing the nicotine to steady her shaking body. She longed to run off, get in her car, and maybe drive to that bar down the road Bertie had told her about, the one where all the baseball players went. 
The very idea of male attention was like a salve, and it helped her slow her breath as she slumped against the warm, concrete wall of the sound stage and looked out at the desert, focusing on the hills in the distance.
It was like looking out at a completely different view than she had faced that morning. The land was now  desolate and unforgiving in the July heat, and the jagged peaks of Superstition mountain loomed like a giant, dark fiery sentinel in the sky. Her chest rose and fell with each inhale and exhale of smoke, her fingers trembled as she tried to quell the turmoil churning inside her. 
Just when she was sure she couldn’t walk back inside, she smelled a hint of sage in the dust, it filled her nostrils with renewed energy. The wind whispered in her ear that she was stronger than she knew, she had trudged harder paths than this.  She could put one foot in front of the other.
The door next to her exploded open and there was the fresh face of the young, blonde PA who had called to her in wardrobe.
“Oh, there you are Miss Balin, we’re ready for you.”
Ina sucked in another drag of her cigarette and took a deep breath. She could do this. Elvis and his entourage were a bunch of childish idiots. Fuck them. 
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True to his promise, the director, Chuck, kept the set closed for the nude bath scene Ina was shooting first. It was just him, the cinematographer, his assistant, the boom operator, and three female PAs. One to hold the clap board and two to help Ina in and out of the tub. The scene was blocked so the camera only captured her naked from behind with the side of her breast visible as she donned a sheer blue robe lined with black lace. They would run it from the top, then Chuck would run over and tell her how stunning she was and ask for another take as she shivered. It took eleven takes in all before he and the DP were content they had the footage they needed.  
Ina reclined in her chair, trying to warm up during the short break before the next scene. She was rehearsing the dialogue as people trickled in to shoot her first love scene with Elvis, and she suddenly became paranoid that other crew members had heard Jerry and Charlie’s story about Elvis’ calling her a drag queen. She sat up and looked around. Suddenly every hushed whisper was about her, every glance her way was filled with pity. She gripped the side of her chair and told herself to get it to-fucking-gether. 
The next scene was meant to occur directly after the bath, when her character, Tracy, discovers Elvis’ character, Jess, rummaging around in her bedroom looking for his gun. They would argue, then kiss, then argue more before he carried her to the bed. After that, he would remove her robe and begin to kiss her neck, stop and then put his hat on the bedpost, before the camera moved in for an extreme close up of her face as they made love.
Then they would break the set and set up for the second sex scene that was meant to take place at the end of the film when Jess has been victorious against the band of outlaws and takes her to Mexico with him to start a new life across the border. 
Ina squeezed her hand, using her thumb as a metronome as she said her lines. “I must look new to you - toooo you  - I MUST look NEW to YOU now.” She had these little games she had learned in acting class to vary the rhythm and emphasis over and over until she was comfortable in the dialogue, in the character, and it rolled off her tongue naturally, without having to think about it.
Elvis' voice rang out high above the buzz of the crew and all the words she had ever known fell out of her head. She felt her sphincter clench up tightly instinctively as if on cue at the sound of his chuckle, and a frown formed on her lips. The air was suddenly ripe with the smell of sweaty bodies and stale coffee and cigarette smoke.
Looking over her shoulder, just the sight of him surrounded by his flunkies made Ina’s stomach sour. A spark of defiance bloomed in her belly at his smug face and she longed now to walk up to Elvis and slap him sharply across the face before telling him off for being such a rotten two-faced charming bastard. But instead she popped another black beauty to fight off the hunger she had sensed growing in her belly and steeled herself to give the performance of a lifetime.
Elvis passed by her chair as she stood, a crooked grin pushing the apples of his cheeks up above his beard. 
“Well, might as well get it over with.”
His despondency made Ina bristle. She was completely incapable of stopping the prickly voice that sprang out from her throat.
“We don’t have to shoot these love scenes.”
Elvis paused in his stride toward the set and looked back at Ina, his brow furrowed for a moment before he grinned again, bigger and wider.
“Huh? Course I want to shoot ‘em, love scenes are my specialty.”
Ina narrowed her eyes at his stupid, smirking expression as he glanced around at his friends as they whistled and chimed in with a chorus of stupid affirmations. 
“Uh huh.”
“That’s right.“
“On and off the set” 
“Well, you seem anxious to, what was it, get this over with?” She said cooly, leveling him with a glare. “So then it must be me. Maybe we could just cut them from the film altogether. CHUUCK?”
Elvis’ face began to scrunch up in a frown as Ina’s voice rang out like a knife, cutting through the chaos of a live shoot. The sound stage had been buzzing with activity as the crew readied the set, but now everyone had stopped what they were doing and turned to stare at the two leads.
Elvis’ eyes zoned in on Ina and his face clouded with concern as his hands tightened against his body in clenched fists.
“Now see here - “ then he paused and took a deep breath, smiling big. 
That broad, smooth, movie star beam. 
“Aw, now I think we got are wires crossed someplace.That’s jus my ole stage fright talkin’, honey. Gets me ev’ry time like a sonabitch. Didn’t mean nothin’ by it, Iny Tiny, come get over here. I feel very honored to work with you. I been sayin’ all week, haven’t I, Chuck? That I couldn’t wait for Ina to get here, class up this joint’?”
Ina looked at where Chuck stood, hands at his hips as he nodded, a terrified grin plastered on his face.
“That’s right, that’s right. Why, that's what we’ve all been saying, Ina, we couldn’t wait for our Tracy to get here.”
Chuck dug a handkerchief out of his pocket and wiped it over his big, balding head as he spoke slowly, as if talking to a spooked horse. Ina
“I think I know what’s going on, my dear.”
Chuck looked over at Elvis and then put his arm around Ina, guiding her toward her mark. 
“You’re nervous. We’ve just spent two hours during the bath scene. And this sort of  - um - delicate, shall we say, yes, delicate feminine performance is new to you, isn't it?”
“Well, yes, I suppose, but I - “ 
Chuck put his finger to Ina’s mouth
“Say no more, my dear. It’s natural to feel vulnerable in this situation. But let me assure you, everything is being shot in the most artistic technique possible. And you, well, just look at you, huh?” He spun her around in the center of the set. 
“Ina, you are a dream. My living, breathing Renoir painting. And I want you to know, that was my inspiration for your room here. The colors, the outfits, a Parisian chorus line meets the Old West. The colors, the costumes, they are meant to evoke the Belle Epoch, you know? You are wearing the same outfits Degas’ dancers wore, did you know that?”
“Uh huh, you mean if they wore anything?” Ina added in a clipped tone.
“See, and that’s exactly it! The original work of art is, of course, the beauty of the female form.”
“Cain’t argue with that.” Elvis smirked, but Ina shot him a withering look which threw him off again and once more he was frowning and searching her face.
Chuck noticed none of this and kept talking. 
“And you are an exemplary example of the female form, a perfect specimen of a woman.”
“Well, I assure you I am no drag queen.”
Elvis coughed nervously, his hands clenched in fists at his side. The quick, sharp look he shot Joe did not escape Ina’s notice and she knew then that he had said the things Jerry and Charlie had been laughing about. She narrowed her glare at him, telegraphing her contempt as he stuttered and tried to regain control of the conversation.
“No - ah-uh -er -  siree, honey, you’re the real deal, got more class than the rest of this outfit combined. Why, I reckon I’m more nervous ‘bout this scene than you are.”
Chuck nodded vigorously.
“Yes, we are all nervous shooting something that is, as I said, delicate like this. And your character is unsure in this scene, she loves Jess, but is torn, because she’s worried he is still the bandit she sent away.  Channel your feelings into the scene and let’s make beautiful artwork here today.”
Ina rolled her eyes. “Ok, ok, I’m ok. Like he said, let’s just get it over with already.” 
Elvis grinned as he walked around the set door to his mark. 
“That’s the spirit, Iny Beany.”
Chuck yelled action, directing them through the scene as the cameras rolled.
“You see him rooting through your stuff, and you think of how long it's been, how he left you without a word. You hate him because you love him, but you wish you didn’t and you are trying to keep it all bottled up. Beautiful. Indifferent. That’s it Ina, that cool, icy glare, it’s perfect.”
It was not hard for Ina to muster a cool, icy glare for Elvis as he looked down at her. Every time they started, one of the PAs would come over and spray her body and chest with water for continuity with the bath scene that was just supposed to have occurred in the storyline.
In the third run through, she couldn’t help herself when Elvis’ foot knocked into hers. She thought of that guilty grimace she saw move across his face at the words “drag queen” and she stepped on his foot. Hard. 
“Perfect! Perfect Ina, you’re nailing it!” Chuck called out from where he was watching the monitor.
“Nailing me is more like it,” Elvis said, jumping back, a hurt pout on his face. Then he reached out and stroked the side of her shoulder. 
“Say, you sure you ok? You’re not sore at me for something, are you? It’d be better if we just clear the air. If I said something this morning, or did something in passing, honey, I’m sorry. But you gotta tell me.”
Ina looked in his big blue eyes, searching hers, seeking a connection. She glanced off behind him, at the brocade pink wall paper. The air smelled of bath water, sweat and cheap aftershave. Chuck was right, she thought, this could be a cheap Parisian brothel.
“I assure you, I am fine.” Ina forced her mouth into a tight smile. “Just watch where you’re going and we’ll be fine.”
He squinted his eyes at her, but seemed to decide against whatever it was he originally wanted to say, and stepped back with his arms up in surrender. “Okay. Alright. Whatever you say, Iny,  my mistake. Let’s try again, I bet we’ll get it right somehow.”
They went through the whole scene three times, up until the part where Jess lifts Tracy up and carries her to the bed. Elvis’ eyes narrowed as he stepped toward her, uttering his lines in a stern, serious voice. But when he picked her up and hoisted her in the air, she heard Charlie’s obnoxious laughter in the background and their words from earlier began to play through her head again on a loop.
The shrill sound of his laugh sent a sharp bolt of pain down the center of her head and suddenly she felt as if ginger ale was bubbling up on to the top of her brain. She wasn’t sure if she could hold it together anymore. 
There was the taste of bile again at the back of her throat. She swallowed, running through all of the tools she had learned in the Actor’s Studio such as telling herself she was Tracy and trying to channel her anger into the tension between Tracy and Jess. She was, after all, supposed to be fighting Jess’ advances at first and pushing him off before giving in. But she could barely look at Elvis and instinctively jerked back when he placed her on the bed and began to move his fingers over her sternum. 
Her head throbbed and she could feel more tears welling up. She had to get out of there and take a little break, so she cried out, “CUT!”
Elvis jumped back, a panicked look on his face.
“Did I hurt you, Iny Beany? Wanna do it again, just to practice, from the mark by the bed?”
“No.,” she hissed under her breath, pushing him away. Maybe she didn’t need a break, maybe they could just skip this scene altogether.
“No, no no. I’m sorry, I just can’t do it. Chuck, do we really need a full love scene? We’re not making Belle du Jour here.”
Elvis had his hands on his hips, a stricken look on his face while Ina stood, straightening what was left of her dignity and snapping her fingers for the PAs to bring her thicker robe. 
“Ina, darling, we just went through this.” Chuck’s  transatlantic accent was getting thicker and higher-pitched the more he spoke. “And I hate to bring this up, you know I do, my dear, but it's in your contract.”
“Contract or not, I can’t do it. I just can’t.”
“My dear, what can I do to make you comfortable?” Chuck pleaded.
“Nothing. I would rather make love to a rattlesnake than to that man.”
Elvis stood taller, his fingers balled up into fists as his leveled, polished voice began to transform into a Southern snarl. 
“Yeah, uh huh, well I had about enough of this bull shit. Rattlesnake, huh? That can be arranged, honey, why, I’ll get it myself.”
“Well, I bet it will be small and limp, just like you.”
He staggered back when she hurled those words at him, flustered and mumbling as he looked around the set to see who had been in earshot and heard her yell out the words ‘small and limp’ at him. The answer, of course, was everybody. Because everybody in the crew was watching.
They had, of course, originally gathered around because Charro! was making film history with today’s shoot. 
All the popular European films being released had sex scenes, James Bond was having sex. Several recent westerns had initially included nude scenes, but studios had cut them at the last minute. 
But 1968 marked the dawning of a new era. The MPAA had a new rating system. Bonnie & Clyde had proven last year that audiences not only had a stomach for violence, but wanted sex. And like Bonnie, they wanted it much more than they got it. And so this picture, and about a dozen others in production, were all racing to give it to them.
Even if the plan was to pan to a hat and then just Ina’s face, Charro! was going to make history. 
Or rather, it would have made history. Instead, the entire crew watched in horror as Ina threw up her hands and stomped off in protest while Elvis coughed loudly, took a deep breath, and then announced to the crowd
“Don’t worry, folks, we’re gonna get Arthur Rankin in here and he’s gonna recreate these scenes with claymation. Make a little Elvis the Rednosed Cowboy.” His voice rang out with forced cheerfulness, followed by a ripple of nervous laughter that spread through the soundstage. 
“Boy, I tell ya what, now that would be a historical milestone, huh Chuck? Bet audiences would pay double ta see a stop motion love scene.”
The director nodded as Elvis patted him on the shoulder with a forced, playful candor and then strode out of the studio followed by his entourage.
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Elvis’ motel room was dark, save for the television, an ever present companion, and the table lamp that cast shadows against the wall outlining Alma’s silhouette. The light captured every curve of her body as it lay sideways across the bed next to him. His fingers tapped absentmindedly over her bronze thigh, but his mind was otherwise occupied and failed to register the coquettish look she was giving him as she pouted and ran her hand over his arm.
He was thinking of his first film and the time had asked his co-star, Richard Egan, the secret to good acting.
“You. You already got it kid, in spades. Why do you think they renamed this picture after your song? Just be you, unaffected, unadulterated. You’re a natural.”
But what good had natural ability been without opportunity? He’d had such high hopes back then, hopes to be in real movies about real people, stories with an edge that packed a punch. And for a time, it seemed like he was. Dramas in which the singing was a plausible part of the premise.
But somewhere along the way the edge had been sanded off and his plans had all gone wrong. He’d gotten himself typecast as the type of character he hated, a romantic lead who broke into song during an appointment with the IRS. Those roles were fine for Rock Hudson, but not for him. He knew he could do better. Better than dumb musicals, better than all this. 
He had those same high hopes for this picture when he first read the script.
“Guess I should be happy this western’s actually being filmed in the goddamn desert and not in some California shrub valley,” he mumbled, balling his hands into fists as he spoke.
“What was that, baby?”
Elvis looked up at the woman lying next to him, he had forgotten she was even there. Her warm body next to him had become just another amenity of the room, like the mini fridge or the Gideons Bible. The puzzled look on her young, naive face reminded him how truly alone he was. 
Oblivious to Elvis' existential crisis, Alma decided maybe he needed some prompting after their kisses had dissolved into still silence. She moved her hand to Elvis’ thigh, stopping when he flinched and jumped up almost as if he were trying to escape her touch. She frowned, then flipped her hair as she adjusted and lay prone over the polyester orange bedspread, fashioning a come hither look on her face. She could tell he was rattled by the onset fight and was trying everything in her bag of tricks to laugh it off and redirect him to something better. Her. 
“Ha, small and limp. That bitch has no idea what she’s missing. It took all my self control not to cry out in front of everyone that you have an anaconda in your pants, Elvis.”
A grimace passed over his face, and Elvis started to button up his shirt and mumble to the floor.
“Don’t, baby - just-” He softened his voice at the rejection he saw in her eyes. “Honey, I can’t stand it when women do that.”
“What, what am I doing wrong?” Alma sat, her face falling as she scooted back against the pillows.
Elvis pulled on the red bandana around his neck and paced the other way, looking back at her as he tucked his shirt back into his clean, brown corduroy pants. His shoulders stiffened.
“Insincerity. I can’t, I jus hate it when women go overboard trying to puff up my ego. I’ve had my share of lovers, no one ever complained. That’s not the point.”
“It isn’t?”
“Nah, honey. What that bitch is really saying is she don’t take me serious, I’m not man enough for this fucking role, for her New York high society standards. Fat lot of good any a that did her, thinks I don’t know she’s been in what, five pictures? Jerry Lewis? Try twenty five, sister. Give me a goddamn break. She’s wound so tight, she could start a fight in an empty house, I tell ya what, boy, and that’s the god honest truth.”
He began to pace the room, wringing his hands over as he walked.
“This un’ is gonna be different, Chuck said, more raw, Chuck said, more real.” His voice trilled between a high falsetto and a deep growl. “Then first they cut the violence, and now this bullshit. What’s next? Bet they gonna try and have me sing to my fuckin horse!” 
He punched the wall. “Fucking cowboys don’t fucking sing!” He screamed to the ceiling, then began to pace again, his hands now balled up in fists.
He turned and looked at Alma. “You ever see John Wayne sing? Gary Cooper? ‘Fore they walked over to the OK corral to shoot the bad guy?”
He punched the wall again and then turned and tried to compose himself when he saw Alma flinch.
“Ok ok ok ok.” He took a deep breath. “I  - uh - this picture’s got me all keyed up.”
“Want some grass? Flor has some killer grass, make you forget today even happened.”
“Nah, honey -  now, good lil girls like you should know better than to mess with that stuff.”
Alma pulled her hand through her hair and struck what she thought was a glamorous, come hither pose.
“Want me to give you a blow job? Help you relax?”
Elvis frowned. “Man, like a goddamn cat in heat and twice as willing. Don’t you think of nothing else?” 
Alma sat up and started to put her clothes on, her voice as low as her hopes for the evening.
“You’re the one who invited me up here and had me undress while you watched. I’m just trying to do what I thought you wanted.”
“Well stop tryin’ to think, you’ll wear yourself out.” 
Alma grabbed her shoes and opened the door, finding Joe on the other side with one hand about to knock and another holding up a tray of food in his hands.
“Oh, hey -”
“Hey yourself.” Alma said with a huff and a very aggressive hair flip, her long brown tresses smacking Joe’s cheek.
Elvis shrugged as Joe looked after Alma, whistling to himself. 
“Man o man, EP, you got the prettiest girl here. What’s up her butt?”
“I don’t know - Something up with the chicks on this picture, man, stuck up and crazier than a sack full a possums.”
Elvis looked at himself in the mirror hanging on the wall across from the bed as Joe mumbled about how many crazy women they had met on their journeys, half-listening as he stroked his beard and reassured himself that he looked just as fit as Clint Eastwood. And more handsome. He winked at himself and straightened his belt buckle, then looked over at Joe.
“Now hold on a second, son, jus’ what in high heaven is that?”
Elvis lifted his hands from his left hip and pointed at the cheeseburgers and fries Joe had laid out on the table, fixing him with a dark glare.
“You said dinner, EP, brought you dinner.”
“Tryin’ to get me back in the 200 club like you? Don’t think I haven’t noticed you been auditioning for the part of lardass of the group.”
“But last night - I thought you - 
“I thought, I  thought - you ain’t thought shit, and that’s the problem. I’m supposed to be shirtless on film tomorrow and you fixin’ to get me fat as a boarding house cat.”
Joe frowned, furrowing his brow for the split second it took him to plaster a smile back on and nod. Now he understood what was up Alma’s ass, and what was about to be up his too if he didn’t turn this around.
“Right, boss, my mistake, tell me what you want and I’ll go get it.”
“What I want, what I want. Ain’t nobody cares what I want, and that’s the goddamn problem. Save a whole lotta time and money if you just thought to ask first.” 
Elvis put his hands on his waist and cried out an inaudible growl to the ceiling. 
“Jus… just bring me a caesar salad. A big one.”
Joe hurried out and Elvis went over to cover up the burgers, but the smell was too tempting, so instead he sat down and began to devour them one after another, mumbling to himself in between bites.
“Goddamit, if I look fat tomorrow it’ll be Joe’s goddamn fuckin’ fault.”
There was a knock at the door, and he yelled for whoever it was to come in as he went to wash up.
“Joe told me to come get rid of the - uh - food tray.”
Charlie’s voice trailed off as Elvis emerged from the bathroom and followed Charlie’s eyes to the table and the plates that were empty, save for a handful of cold fries.
“Well, have at it - wait.”
Elvis stepped back and looked around, grabbing one of the guns from the night stand and put it in his belt. He had all this nervous energy running up and down his body, he needed to just get out of this room, out of this motel, get as far as possible to just breathe some fresh air and think. He snapped his fingers at Charlie.
“Grab Gee Gee, we’re going for a drive.”
Charlie’s face softened into a big goofy, excited grin. “Okee dokee artichokee, where we heading?”
“Anywhere that ain’t this goddamn motel, numb nuts.” Elvis started to head down the exterior stairs, running his hand over the warm, wrought iron bannister. He looked back over his shoulder and clapped.
“Bring the cigars, too, then meet me at the car. Chop chop.” 
A renewed sense of purpose guided his steps as Elvis walked down the corridor of motel rooms that lined the pool,and he ran his hands up and down the front of his shirt. He mulled over what he wanted to do that didn’t involve eating more hamburgers. Or eating anything. 
When he looked up, he realized he had stopped outside Ina’s room. There, through the curtain, he could see the back of her through the curtain where she sat on her bed, talking to someone on the phone. 
“No no no, Mickey, of course I understand. Yes, well, I don’t know, I think you have to have been on top to get back on top, but your meaning is not lost on me. I get it. Yes. Opportunity of a lifetime. I know. Elvis Elvis.  Don’t worry. I’m gonna go make it right, right now.”
She looked up at the ceiling and wiped the sides of her eyes, summoning a mask of quiet cheer Elvis recognized well as she clutched the phone tight. 
“Yes, no  - I’ll be a good girl, Mickey. I promise. I know, I know, no bread.”
He was transfixed, enjoying the power he felt watching her unaware, and pressed closer to the glass, careful not to draw attention to himself. A small front section of her long, flowing hair fell out from behind her ears and she absentmindedly began to twist it nervously. She looked like a fragile little girl, like a beautiful flower someone had stepped on. The sight of her anxiously talking away pulled on his heart strings.
He shook his head. What the fuck had happened? Why was she so angry at him?  He'd played the part of the funny, affable host from the minute they met, introducing her to the crew and having Gee Gee get her screwdrivers as they all yukked it up in the bar. He'd about busted his gut when she lobbed a handful of ice at Charlie and knocked him over the back of the couch. 
He stood there watching as her big brown eyes lit up while she told her agent how nice the desert was. He almost believed her. Goddamit, why couldn’t she just be a good girl and get along? She’d been sweet and flirty in make-up and then what, an hour or two later, her claws were out and she’d aimed them at him. 
He whistled and thought about the fickleness of women as he turned to walk the long way around the pool. 
Thirty seconds later he heard the thud of a door opening followed by Ina’s voice calling out for him.
Elvis stopped, his hands moved out as if to balance himself as he swiveled around, slowly, to face her. A sense of dread settling in his stomach. Up above him, he saw Charlie and Gee Gee making their way down the staircase, while to his left a group of crew members were heading for the pool. The smell of chlorine wafted through the open air hallway.
He cautiously trudged back toward the doorway to where Ina stood, each footfall a slow thump of his cowboy boot against the hard concrete sidewalk. 
“Oh good, I’m glad I caught you, Elvis.” She swallowed, there it was again, that cheerful mask settling over her face as she exhaled a nervous laugh. “Could I talk to you for a minute?”
Elvis straightened up, looking around again before pulling on the red bandana at his throat. He definitely didn’t want to be alone with Ina. She was unpredictable and he couldn’t stand the awkward energy that flickered between them. However, he also didn’t want another public scene and he could already hear their names being whispered by some of the crew at the pool.
So he did what he always did with an audience, he mustered a wide, beaming smile and spoke in a nonchalant, cool voice:
“Hey honey, you ain’t gotta worry bout me, I’m all good. You get your beauty sleep and I’ll see you tamarra onset an - “
Ina’s lip trembled, she looked like she might fall apart at any moment.
Shit he thought, unable to stop himself from walking over to her and stroking her shoulder.
“There there, been a rough day. This desert heat, I tell ya what, baby, does things to ya head. Now go ahead and listen to ol’ Elvis -”
Ina put her hand over his where it squeezed her shoulder.
“Could we just talk - just for a moment?” Her eyes pleaded with him. “Alone. I -  I won’t take much time, I just - I’d like to apologize and clear the air if you’ll let me. Otherwise, otherwise I won’t be able to sleep and then you’ll be making love to a haggard old zombie first thing in the morning.”
Elvis' eyes softened and he looked around once more before nodding. “Ok.” 
As soon as the door closed he was an obedient puppy letting her lead him by the hand to sit on the bed, where he took off his cowboy hat and toyed with it in his lap. 
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Ina stepped away, backing toward the dresser where she lifted herself to sit next to the TV, but then changed her mind. She felt like a ship adrift, unmoored and out of her comfort zone. Sitting and swinging her legs about was too casual, she decided, so she stood back up and swept the hair that had fallen out of her high ponytail behind her ears.
Just make it short, sweet, earnest, she reminded herself, you’re no stranger to eating humble pie. Indeed, Ina reflected on the number of times she had apologized unnecessarily just to smooth things over with her mother or sister, a producer, an ad executive. This was one of the first times she felt she actually had behaved badly and now she was lost for words.  If only there was a script for life. 
“I - um - thanks for seeing me - I - I - I.”
All the words left her head when she found Elvis’ dark blue eyes studying her beneath his long lashes. He was rotating his cowboy hat in his lap. The smell of the heavy floral cleaning products the maids had used lingered in the air, stronger now that the air conditioner cycled on with a heaving, mechanic whomp. She swallowed again, and counted to ten, trying to ignore the way the back of her neck seemed to prickle as a chill went down her spine. She steadied herself, forcing her eyes to connect with his. 
“Elvis, I am so very sorry. I mean it. I -  I - I - ’ve never lost it before onset, it is so unprofessional I can barely stand to look at myself.” 
She felt a release of tension as she watched his hands relax. He took a deep breath and stroked his beard.
“You don’t have to worry about me, Ina,  I been making two to three pictures a year since 1933. I can roll with the punches, ain’t nothing I can’t handle. ThoughI gotta admit you threw me off back there.” 
The register of his voice changed from rougher to softer as he looked down at the floor and then back up at Ina’s face. 
“Be honest, did I do anything to offend you or make you mad at me?”
His softer side was almost harder to withstand and his eyes seemed to penetrate her very being, seeking out the secrets she kept hidden in her heart. She shook it off with another nervous chuckle,
“No, no, this was 100% me. I’ve been so nervous about these love making shoots. Chuck’s is telling everyone back in Hollywood this is the first the first film with a sex scene - “
“Isn’t it?”
“Well, I mean, since the production code, maybe, but they’ve shot plenty of them. It’s just that the studio always pulls out at that last minute -”
Ina covered her mouth and gasped when she watched Elvis’ lip curl up at her words but said nothing. He didn’t need to. The glint in his eye said it all and when he waggled his eyebrows up and down Ina laughed out. She was grateful for the levity, it seemed to crack through Elvis’ cool bravada and made this conversation easier.
“Stop, you know what I mean.” 
She blushed, and looked out her window, watching as the silhouettes of two people walked by. It was getting dark, she needed to wrap it up. 
“But yes, today I was nervous, I haven’t been eating or sleeping much, but I promise you - “ 
Her voice wavered as she turned back to find his steady gaze. 
“ - um - no more fights, no more difficult behavior. I am so grateful for this opportunity to work with you and I just hope you can forgive me for my lapse of judgment.”
Elvis stood up, his fingers were once more busy fiddling with his cowboy hat and he spoke in a low whisper.
“Ok. I forgive you. So long as you really ain’t mad at me.”
The breath hitched in Ina’s throat when Elvis looked up at her, biting his lip in a way that made the top jut out a bit as he searched her face once more, as if she were a puzzle he needed to solve.
She gulped. “I - uh - I - no, I just need some sleep - I “
“Honey I can’t help feeling like you’re holding something back here, and if we’re gonna get along, I need you to be completely honest with me.”
Ina looked away. Damn him, he was like one of those fortune tellers back on Coney Island who she had believed as a kid. As a teenager she had learned the truth: they had no supernatural talents, they were just extremely gifted at reading their marks. Like Elvis was reading her right now.
“Oh, I may have been upset about something but it doesn’t matter, it was silly and stupid, like me. I - I was wrong, and I apologize. I’ll happily apologize to you in front of the whole crew tomorrow if you want. Really. If that is what it will take to make amends with you Mr. Presley.”
Elvis clenched his fists. 
“I don’t give a damn about a public apology or the crew or any of that. But I can’t bear it when a woman is sore at me and won’t say why. Ticks me off to no end.”
Tension hung in the air, and Ina sighed. Recounting the whole ordeal made it seem so juvenile now, though it still stung.
“I - I am, I heard some of your friends talking. They -”
“Which friends?”
“Jerry, Jerry and Charlie. I told you, it’s like high school and I can’t believe I let them upset me.”
“Well now you started, better lay it all out for me. Go on.”
“I - I well, I heard them laughing about how you had said I looked like - like drag queen that needed a shave. And they were calling me Groucho and saying I had big feet.”
Ina let her shoulders drop and forced a smile, but she couldn’t stop her hand from pulling on the necklace at her chest.
“Ha, actually now that I say it is kind of funny, you see I - um - I usually have a great sense of humor. Any of my friends would tell you. Some of them are drag queens, actually. They’d probably feel more slighted being compared to me. Your boys just, they  - they just caught me right before I was filming my first nude scene and well - “ 
Ina’s voice trailed off as she watched Elvis get up and pace towards the bathroom growling. 
“Those fucking nitwits, pulling a stunt like that and gummin up tha works -” he turned and his face fell at the pained look on Ina’s face. “You know I never said nothin’ like that.” 
Ina quickly shook her head, summoning the calm veneer that usually came so easy to her. She immediately regretted telling Elvis, now she felt as raw as she did after she had a full waxing appointment at the salon.
In her heart she knew he was lying, she knew from the way he had grimaced, albeit it briefly, on set when she’d said she wasn’t a drag queen. 
Yet there was something earnest and pleading in his eyes that made her question her own grip on reality. This got worse when he bit his lip and looked up at the ceiling, all vulnerable and apologetic, as if searching for the right thing to say. It made her stomach flip up into her throat. Then looked at her, his eyes wide with a newfound warmth as he sought a connection from across the room, as if he were seeing her for the first time. Ina knew right then that she needed to get him out before anything changed.
“Oh, yeah, sure, I know. And, well  it doesn’t matter anyway, right? I mean it’s none of my business what you think of me - like I said, I knew some knockout drag queens, so it’s a compliment really. Ha so - “
Elvis stode over as she spoke and grabbed her hands, his thumb delicately soothing the top of her knuckles. The spicy smell of his aftershave entered her nostrils as he spoke in a low, soft voice.
“Here’s the thing now, Iny Beany, I just need you to know though that I didn’t say none a that. Ya right, them boys still in high school, and they been playing pranks like we’re still in high school. I guar-an-TEE you they knew the assistant had just called for you, and they set that whole thing up to ruin my first sex scene shoot. Have half a mind to fire 'em. They need to learn some goddamn respect."
Ina found herself transfixed, unable to step away or pull her hands from his. She looked him over. He somehow looked like a cowboy who had let a bunch of drag queens dress him. 
He wore a fresh pair of dark green slacks, a thick leather belt and a long sleeve white linen shirt. Over his hands sat several jewel-encrusted rings matched by the two necklaces that lay underneath his red bandana, tied much like a silk ascot through a cravat. His foundation make-up was impeccable, and his hair was styled in a high quiff perfectly slicked back above his forehead. It made him look cavalier and polished at the same time. 
Then there was the way his smokey eye makeup was now smudged around his waterline made him look even more ruggedly attractive. Sweat glistened underneath his beard, almost like glitter.  There, in the dim light of her motel room he looked like the prettiest cowboy she had ever seen.
“Know what I mean?”
Ina shook her head, realizing she’d gotten caught up staring at his scruffy chin and lost track of what he was saying.
“Um, I’m sorry, what did you say?”
A sly grin tweaked up the corners of his lips.
“I said, you cain’t listen to a word outta those boys' moufs, ‘specially Charlie. His elevator don’t go all the way up, if you take my meaning.” 
Elvis stepped in closer to her, cautiously, waiting to see if she stepped away or flinched.  But it was all Ina could do to just keep breathing, each stroke of Elvis' thumb over her hand now sent a bolt of electricity down her chest.
“How I could I say something like that about you, Iny? Ya so beautiful, I could barely look at you too long before turning into mush.”
Ina rolled her eyes, but she could feel her own resolve waver as his hand moved to her hips and a blush crept over her face.
“Stop, you don’t have to lie to me.”
He shook his head, his nose tickling over hers.
“How can you say that Iny Meany? You have no idea, no idea what you do to me.”
Ina’s heart skipped a beat when she felt his thumb at the indent of her girdle. The air between their bodies seemed to crackle now with heat, and he pulled her closer, nuzzling his nose over hers. A tear rolled down her face and he lifted his finger to catch it.
“Ssshhhh, s’ok baby, s’ok. I got you. And I promise ain’t no one gonna talk like that about you again.”
He pressed his cheek against hers and she pushed back,willfully embracing the harsh scruff of his beard. She could feel herself teetering on the precipice of something dangerous. If she crossed this line with Elvis it would change the dynamic of their work together, it would change her reputation. She had vowed to herself she wouldn’t be susceptible to his charms, him, of all people. He was so obvious, so cliche. And yet here she was, nuzzling her nose back along his.
Emboldened, Elvis gently pressed his lips to her skin, peppering her jaw with light kisses. Ina eagerly moved to give him access to her neck and he instantly took the hint and suckled at her nape, pausing to grin as she moaned out a high, breathy unladylike moan.
Her chest heaved as their lips met and the faint aroma of mustard filled Ina’s nostrils.
“Oh my god, you taste like hamburger.”
Elvis chuckled, unsure of himself for a moment. Ina enjoyed watching him become self conscious.
"I’m sorry baby, you want me to go brush my teeth?”
She shook her head, pulling him closer and speaking between kisses.
 “No - mmmm - it’s amazing — mmm - haven’t had a mmamburger in months.”
Elvis let out a nervous laugh. 
“Ok, ya kook, I’ll be sure and eat hamburger every day.” 
"Ha! I'm gonna hold you to that, Presley."
His fingers brushed over her thighs as he lifted her onto the dresser and Ina trembled.
“You ok? Just say the word, and I’ll stop.”
She shook her head, stopping was the last thing on her mind. Though she suddenly thought of crew members at the pool who’d seen her call Elvis into her room to apologize.
“I wonder what everyone outside thinks we’re doing in here.”
“Hmmm, whatever they’re thinking, I guarantee it's not nearly as good as what I’m thinking.”
“Elvis - I - I don’t want to have sex.”
He arched his eyebrow.
“Whoo now, who said anything about sex?”
“I mean, of course I want to have sex with you.”
He stoked her thighs, a faint smile on his face.
"Relax Iny, we’re just having some fun. Don’t overthink it. We ain’t gonna do nothin’ you don’t wanna do.”
Ina released a nervous giggle. “OK, you see, I um, well, actually the thing is that I sometimes break out when I - I do it.”
“Really? You know that Max Factor stuff will cover anything.”
“Ha! I know - I just think tonight, no matter what I say later, we should just keep it simple.”
“I gotcha Iny girl. Sweet. Simple.”
Ina’s pulse quickened at the way he leaned into her chest, his hands worked up from her thighs. She felt like a giddy teenager as she smiled gleefully into his face, her right hand fiddling with his ear.
“You have a great earlobe, you know that? I can see why you’re a movie star.”
“Huh. That right? Cuz of my earlobe?”
He leaned in and kissed the top of her nose.
“Oh yeah, it's very photogenic. I see why this is the only part of you in frame during the sex scene. I mean the rest could as ugly as Boris Karloff -” Ina waved her other hand in front of Elvis face. “But this lobe, right here, it’s a million dollar lobe.” 
Elvis chuckled. “That right?”
“Uh huh. I hope you have it insured - oh god.” 
Elvis' right hand moved over her breast, flicking her nipple. 
“Hmm, well, maybe I should stop whateva this is and go call the colonel, get him right on that, uh huh.”
He moved as if to leave, smirking at how quickly Ina pulled him back into her arms.
“Don’t go.” 
She squeaked out, voice cracking.
“You sure? You don want me to fetch a rattlesnake to kiss instead? See if you like making love to his earlobe?”
“Stop.” 
Ina swatted him, straightening the line of his bandana. 
“Please don’t repeat what I said earlier, I was tired and nervous and upset and I hate myself for that whole scene. I really am sorry, Presley.”
“I know, baby, I know. I'm just teasing.”
He pressed his lip son hers once more and Ina rocked forward into him, following the slow, tender rhythm of Elvis’ body. She felt like a buoy, still unmoored and adrift in the ocean, but now she didn’t want to come into shore. She wanted to stay like this, swaying back and forth to the ebb of Elvis’ tide,  delighting in the wet smack of Elvis’ lips every time they smashed into hers. Again and again.
Her whole body buzzed when his fingers trailed down to her hem and absentmindedly began to work their way under her dress. He had notched himself between her legs, fitting snugly against her knee caps. She made a small squeak of surrender as she opened her hips to bring him in closer. The taste of onions and pepsi and meat filled her mouth as he took her with the tip of his tongue, slowly owning and consuming her completely. 
Elvis moaned into her and deepened their kiss.
Ina lost herself in the sweet supple cushion of his lips. His hands moved over her bosom,  fanning the spark in her belly into a flame. Then his fingers moved under her skirt and feathered over the warmth of her panties. Ina felt the bulge begin to swell at her thigh and then Elvis jerked back.
Every cell in her body cried out to pull him back into her embrace and then until he was inside her and they were melting into each other. Vows and boundaries be damned. Thank god he had some sense of self control.
“Whooa, whoa whoa.” He muttered slowly, almost painfully.
Ina nodded, licking her lips as she met his eyes.
“You ok?’
“Yeah, you?”
Elvis took a deep breath. “Course, honey, I - I - I just think we better put the breaks on for tonight.”
“Yeah, sure, no. Totally. This was exactly what I wanted.”
He wiped his mouth, shooting her an impish smile, like he knew exactly what she wanted.
“Guess I should clear out, huh?”
“You don’t have to leave, I mean, I enjoy your company. Is what I mean. But if you are looking to get lucky, then yes, I suppose you should find one of those extras you've been playing patty cake with.”
“Huh, okay, well I'll be on my way then. Catch ya later.” 
But he didn't move, just stayed there hovering above her. His forehead leaning into her as he pushed in even closer, pressing the air out of her lungs.
“You do have a reputation to keep up. I understand.”
"Mhmmmm."
Elvis shook his head and went to sit on her bed, up against the head board.
“Look, I'm willing to put my reputation aside, jus for one night. I promise, no funny business. Clothes stay on.” 
He smirked.
“Unless you’d feel more comfortable without your dress on.”
Ina hesitantly moved to perch next to him. She could still taste the mix of Elvis’ salty sweat on her tongue as she wiped her raw lips.
“That’s awfully accommodating of you, Presley.”
“What can I say, Iny Beany, I’m an open minded guy. Always say, if a girl wants to take her own dress off, who am I to say she can’t?’
“Well, if it’s all the same to you I think I’ll keep mine on. For now. There’s still time for you to make an exit.”
“Aw, now shut up with that exit junk already and get in here.”
Elvis pulled Ina down into the curve of his arm, and she sighed, embracing the cozy warmth of his body and rubbing her hand over the trim stretch of his stomach as he spoke to her in a soft, friendly voice.
"Alright now, I want you to tell me everything there is to know about you. How did  the hell you end up in a god forsaken Elvis Presley picture, huh?”
“Hmmm, poor life choices? But Elvis, I thought you liked this film? I thought you were the one who made it happen.”
“Aw, well, sure, the first script was pret-tee fantastic. It was gritty and had guts, ya know, but then these damn producers been wittlin' it away to nothing, man. Chuck cornered me this afternoon once you'd left and started in on nagging me to sing the title song.”
“You don’t want to sing? Just the title? it would be so good.”
“So you like the way I sing, Iny?” 
Elvis’ eyes danced but then he remembered what they were talking about and was solemn once more. 
“Yeah, naw man, that would set it up as another Presley musical, the next they’ll be trying to get me to sing to my horse. No self respecting cowboy sings, you ever heard of a singing cowboy? Never seen John Wayne sing.”
“OK, sure, but what about Roy Rogers, Gene Autry, Hank Williams was the Driftless Cowboy, right?” Elvis leveled her with his blue eyes and pinched her side. 
“Hmmm - guess you got me there. But it’s 1968, I’d like to see Gene Autry sell a movie in today’s economy. My boy my boy. Today it ain't no joke. Can you see him in The Good, The Bad and The Ugly?”
Ina tilted her head in agreement back onto Elvis' shoulder, she felt the same way she did sinking into a pair of comfy, worn-in slippers, and founding his chest as relaxed and welcoming,
“Trust me, I get it, I’m just grateful I don’t have to do a rape scene in this film.”
He squeezed Ina tighter, kissing her cheek.
“Yeah, me too, honey, real grateful. Boy. Don’t know why anyone want ta see that.”
 “The old west ain’t what it used to be.”
“You can say that again.”
Elvis' arms closed around Ina tighter as they murmured the hours away, comparing diet pills, LA taco huts and favorite movies while their limbs easily intertwined into one another. The closest he got to undressing her was the moment around midnight when he stealthily undid her pony tail and played with her hair while she pretended to be miffed. Then he kissed her forehead and told her he had done her a favor, because it looked better this way, and she should just be a good girl and do as he said. Which got him a light slap and a big “HA!”
They spent the next hour enjoying a playful, cozy respite together in the dim orange glow of Ina’s hotel room. It was well past one in the morning when he gave her a parting kiss that turned into a series of parting kisses before he snuck back up to his suite. 
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Shooting began the next day at 7 a.m., and you could have knocked the director, Chuck, over with a long, pink gaudy boa feather as he found Elvis and Ina in good spirits ready to work. They exchanged playful barbs and their onscreen chemistry sizzled when they went through each sequence, pausing between takes for Ina’s chest to be spritzed while another batch of assistants dabbed Elvis’ forehead with dry unused coffee filters. The industry’s secret weapon against perspiration.
Elvis found Ina in her dressing room during a break and their lips met with stifled giggles as they kissed now with away from the ever present surveillance of the crew, laughing and talked into each other’s mouths.
“Oh my god, now you taste like bacon. I swear Elvis, you’re gonna have me off my diet and then I’ll swell up like a balloon and then Charro! will be a very different film about a cowboy and his pregnant saloon madam.”
“Baby, you gotta let yourself have one hamburger now and then, trust me now, I been doing this longer than you. It will help the cravings.”
Ina kept her mouth shut as she calculated that she had been in this business just as long as he had, since she began modelling at 15 in 1955.
“Ok. I give in. I have no willpower around you. I will have one hamburger this week.”
“Tonight, honey. Imma have you for dinner.” He winked. “Over for dinner, I mean.  I’ll have one a my guys come get you and bring you up to my room later. ”
“Ok. Dinner. Tonight. Your room.” She grinned as she chased the taste of bacon on his tongue and the salty scent of his body as it enveloped her until a knock on the door brought them back into their roles on set as Jess and Tracy.
That night Elvis went through his usual routine after a shoot, which began with a shower to wash off the desert and the dust and the sweat of the set off his body. He took extra care in how he dressed, selecting a light blue dress shirt and a white suit, capping off his outfit with a small black porkpie hat. He doused himself in aftershave and the smell of Old Spice smacked Joe in the face when he came in to set up Elvis’ calls to Memphis and LA.
Once Elvis hung up his phone he leaned over and banged on the wall for Joe to come back in.
“You want me to get that sweet little Mexican gal boss? Alma?”
“Did I tell you to do that? That gal ain’t nothing but a big phony, naw man. Wait for me to tell you what to do, son."
Elvis stood up and went to slather more after shave on, exchanging one ring for another at his toiletry bag.
"Go down stairs and invite Ina up to join me for dinner.”
Joe let out a loud cackle. “What, Groucho?”
Elvis paused, taking in the look of disbelief on Joe’s face. His heart sank and he rubbed his hands over one another as he remembered how they all were howling at his jokes about her a few nights ago. 
He hadn’t even really meant it. He’d just said those things after watching Alma and Flor look at Ina with envy during rehearsals. All he had wanted was to put them at ease, make them understand he was attracted to them. Saying what he thought they wanted to hear. But then the boys had chimed in and now they all thought she was a dog. 
Elvis forced a low chuckle and ran his hand through his hair.
“Nah, man, not Ina - I meant Flor. Goddamn it,  this picture messin’ with my head.”  
He swallowed hard, thinking of the way Ina's beautiful big brown eyes looking up at him. They their legs had seemed to fit together, the way conversation had seemed to flow effortlessly. He smiled to himself thinking of the way she had blushed when he snuck into her dressing room. How her breasts had felt beneath as they ran their love scenes. He pushed away the pang of guilt for now and tamped down his desire to hold her once more. Maybe he'd sneak down to her room later if he could get away. But for now he had an image uphold. These guys looked up to him, and his control over them as their boss rested on the how cool they thought he was.
He snapped his finger at Joe. 
“But I don’t wanna hear y’all calling her that no more. Tell the others. Like I said this morning, y’all shitwads talking like that is what got me in trouble in the first place.”
And with that, Elvis spent another night surrounded by people and utterly alone.
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I don't really think I did Ina justice here, look at how great they looked together. We were robbed of their sex scenes.....
taglist:
@i-r-i-n-a-a @ab4eva @eliseinmemphis @richardslady121 @artlover8992 @ashtag6887 @karolshungary @j-v-9-2 @waiting4brucewayne2adoptme @notstefaniepresley @dollette02 @dkayfixates @everythingelvispresley @velvetelvis @moonchild-daniella @lialocklear @obsessionisthecure @louisejoy86 @arrolyn1114 @literally-just-elvis-fics
i don't really have a taglist for one-shots and I apologize if you don't want to be tagged, just let me know and I'll take you off.
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also can we talk about how the core of The Wizard, the Witch and the Wild One is deep platonic friendships that are rich and complex and life-giving and joyful and important and tethered even through conflict. it warms my arospec heart to see childhood friendships graduate into adulthood and be the central connections in each other's lives.
for Eursulon, Ame and Suvi are his only secure connections in this world, his siblings after having been separated from his biological family, and travelling with them restores his joy.
for Ame, Suvi and Eursulon are the only people - other than Grandma Wren - who see her as a whole person, beyond the designation of witch, and she needs them to remind her who she is.
for Suvi, Eursulon and Ame belong to a golden time in her life before she lost her parents, and she trusts them - but not her new partner - with her true name when she is name cloaked.
they are such different and complex characters and they butt heads and disagree and muck around and eat food and fight together, and they just are each other's people, a little chosen family who loves each other through it and will choose each other even when things are hard.
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rebouks · 6 months
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Previous // Next
Oscar stood by the edge of the sidewalk with his hands in his pockets, watching Darien’s taillights disappear around the corner. He had enough to worry about without adding Wyatt’s concerns to the pile, though he couldn’t help wondering where Brynn had ended up. They hadn’t found her, of course; but the city was a big place, it was naïve to think they’d bump into her so easily. Hopefully she was fine-.. making it alone or whatever it was that she was up to.
Sighing heavily, he realised he’d forgotten his keys. It’d probably be better to sit outside all night, to be honest; Courtney would be livid by now. As if summoning her by thought and before he could make his mind up, she came thundering down the staircase, yanking the door open furiously. He should’ve known she’d be waiting for him.
Courtney: Where the hell have you been?! [Courtney hesitated before continuing, but the words fell out of her mouth before she could stop them] Courtney: Are you high-.. drunk? Oscar: Seriously, Cookie? It’s only been five fucking years. [Oscar scowled, hurt by her accusation; though he supposed he couldn’t totally blame her] Oscar: Sorry, I know it’s late… Courtney: I’m well aware of the time, Oscar-.. but someone won’t sleep when you’re not here. Oscar: I’ll put her to bed and we’ll talk, okay? I’ll tell you everything. Courtney: You better-.. working my ass. … Oscar tried to wrangle his haphazard thoughts as he settled Wren, glad for a quiet moment to collect himself. He tentatively joined Courtney downstairs afterward, meeting her expectant gaze with a guilty smile; he should’ve left them to it, his family needed him more than they did. Still, she seemed to have calmed down, and the more he told her, the less angry she became-.. although, he’d tactfully avoided mentioning the state Wyatt had left Gael in. He hadn’t strangled him, after all; and as far as Oscar was concerned, that was a success in of itself. Perhaps a first, even…
Courtney: You shouldn’t have helped them; you could get in trouble! Oscar: [scoffs] I won’t-.. besides, you didn’t hear the desperation in his voice. [Courtney squinted suspiciously] Oscar: I’m serious, he genuinely seemed.. genuine. Courtney: And she feels the same? Oscar: By the sounds of it, yeah. [Courtney fell silent, remaining so for a long time…] Oscar: What’re you thinking? Courtney: I don’t know.. maybe we should help look for her? Oscar: Where? Who knows where she is by now-.. I’m sure she’s fine, I think we’ve got enough on our plate. Courtney: I know, but-.. I’m not sure I would’ve made it without her, y’know? [Oscar winced, his heart twisting painfully as he remembered their shared, buried memories] Oscar: We’ll keep a casual eye out-.. maybe I can do some work in the city now n’ then, ask around. [Courtney nodded in agreement, stifling a yawn] Oscar: You two should get some rest-.. I’ll be up soon.
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