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#“what should we do for the a-” “we are going to study the human world's master-servant relationship. we will be butlers. mc will be
melverie · 1 month
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Not him saying that while giving MC the bedroom eyes
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flovverworks · 27 days
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after a billion yrs i added a lil line about my gbf verse.....<3 one day i might flesh it out to something in-universe, but since gbf is so "oh ure from another world? ya that happens..." i....am gonna keep w that..........(also cuz i do think discussing the different ways of magic, moon-enemy & this n that is more fun like this
#stardust speaking !#i do wanna write but im unsure when ill do so#anyway i need to talk abut that one 1.5 moment with that weird car horn sfx after murrs fancy speech cuz i#was thinking about it again due to one of the descriptions in the alterego event#i still didnt check the website btw is it available info why snows adult and whites a kid or is that a waiting game cuz#that.....#sometimes when i think abuot paradoxroid i think about them. that one was fkd up#snow&white r so fascinating to me#snow & white & figaro & oz are even more fascinating#oz who only started learning abut the world because arthur asked things about the world.................#oz who made arthur pancakes.................................#they make me ill. figaro feels like he should be the most welladapted cuz in some ways he IS. guy who lies about his power and age and love#humans and that one offhand line in 2nd anni about how he has cared for kids!??!? dude i need to reread 2nd anni did that ever get brought#up again#but figaro & love is................guy who leaves when he thinks he isnt loved anymore#<-guy who was taught by snow&white who valued e/o the most#2nd anni makes me lose my mind. figaro and fausts convo. both who felt like it was the other who left LIKE FIGAROS SURPRISE WAS UNREEEAAALL#somethings deeply wrong with him i am so intrigued#i need to go reread his pt2 parts like what the actual hell dude#the mental gymnastics he does in one part is ? id like to study u and the twins under a microscope#this is all shallowly/casually speaking about it btw theres a lot of things left&right about all of these topics that makes them very yummy#i think what gets me the most about pt2 is that a lot of it is things that we alrdy knew regarding characters feelings etc. such as figaro#but seeing them say it themself makes me faint#OH MY GOOODDDDDD THE FLASHBACK CONVO WITH OZ AND FIGARO? ABOUT WOULD U SAVE THE PERSON U LOVE OR THE WORLD#AND HOW FIGARO ENDS UP FALTERING DEAR LOOOOORRRDDDDDDDDDDDDD#fucked up family (affectionate)#i need to think of modern aus again i thought about arthur calling snow & white granpa for one second and everything hrut#ok im sorry i dont know what possessed me. i promise ill be rereading stuff soon#one more thing. fausts part in pt2. god. but in this cursed world the sage trusted me...
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the-busy-ghost · 6 days
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Warning- this is a very petty post, but I think I'm entitled to at least one petty, pissed-off reaction every time I finish a classic novel that hit harder than I expected so take this as my quota for the year.
Also spoiler warning for a book that came out over a century ago but still, I didn't know the plot going in so don't want to ruin it for anyone else, if you haven't read it shut your eyes. (Also Local Tumblr User Going Wild Over Book Published a Hundred Years Ago That Everybody Else Already Read should probably be categorised as akey part of indigenous tumblr culture at this point).
Anyway I just finished the War of the Worlds and in between studying I've thinking about Themes and Motifs as you do, and idly looking for further analysis. I then accidentally ran into an article called 'A Quiet Place II Succeeds Where the War of the Worlds Failed' and:
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Now I haven't seen any of the Quiet Place films, this is not a rant against them and of course everyone is entitled to their own opinions. But re: the ending of The War of the Worlds, I have to ask, did this guy somehow miss, uh, the entire point of the book or am I just utterly insane?
#You're right it's not very satisfying for humanity that the invaders are foiled by a bacteria and not human action! Maybe that's the point!#Maybe it's supposed to be FRIGHTENING and make you ask questions about what humans will do under extreme stress#Not be a morally uplifting tale about Humanity Heroically Defeating the Martians in a Glorious Hollywood Ending#Maybe it's MEANT to be unsatisfying because this is not a straightforward fairytale#I mean I've only read it once and don't know much about Wells' work so I might have misunderstood the point of the book too#But at places it is a very pessimistic view of the human condition and that's partly WHY IT'S SO POWERFUL#That doesn't mean there aren't moments of individual acts of heroism (the Thunderchild for example)#But the question is not just 'how will humanity beat the Martians and prove that we're still the masters of the universe'#Rather 'a) why is humanity so confident that it's ultimately in control of its own destiny#And b) here's lots of scenes of societal collapse and of people pushed to the brink and what would YOU do in those circumstances?#Would YOU feel remorse about silencing the curate even if it did lead to his death?#What if it rather than a foolish adult it had been a small child?#And even if they were weak did they DESERVE it? Yes it might have been necessary but should it be policy going forward?#Would you also be attracted briefly by the certainties that the artilleryman's (rather fascist) plan seems to offer so humanity survives?#But what sort of humanity would that be if it DID survive and is it worth it? The narrator feels he needs to justify the curate's death#The artilleryman would have probably never have thought it was anything OTHER than justifiable or indeed laudable#Under strain and stress would you start to turn against even your loved ones and become brutal?#Is that the only hope for human survival beyond complete surrender? And was the destruction of London maybe even 'cleansing'#In the eugenics sense or in the sense of a natural horror of dirt and germs?#And the vast exodus of six million people fleeing headlong in panic - we might not have seen that exact phenomenon#But didn't the twentieth century subsequently go on to show us unprecedented scale of slaughter and refugee movements and communal strife?#At the end of the day what really separates humanity from other animals? And what separates us from the Martians?#It's not an uncontroversial book- it was written over a hundred years ago for goodness sake and there are questions worth asking#about the way imperialism and arguments about eugenics and population control and all sorts of other dodgy areas operated on Wells' mind#But dear God I really don't think the problem with the book is that 'Humanity didn't save the day!'#Unsatisfying ending? Yes. A FAILURE? No not in my opinion- looks like it was exactly what Wells set out to do#Humanity didn't win the war of the worlds they had a narrow escape and though it might not be martians next time#Why wouldn't disaster return in the future? Sure we've studied their flying machines and even preserved a martian in a jar#But for all our science what have we ACTUALLY learned that will enable us to avert future human catastrophes? Ethically or socially?#Alright rant over- as usual my opinion is not universal nor necessarily well-informed this take just really got my goat
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berryzul · 17 days
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i do think beauty is the only thing that gives meaning to life yeah i wanna study philosophy of aesthetics and art . IS IT PREDICTABLE ?!
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hohuios · 10 months
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Tag drop: 2/2
#[ visage. ] you know another man as good looking as i am? the correct answer is no; by the way.#[ mini study. ] is it decided from when we're born then? ones born without much power are fated to be stamped out by you?#[ meta. ] one who's let his soul rot can't measure up to someone with a real soul just by getting power. that's not how it works down here.#[ essence. ] it’s a cruel and random world. and yet the chaos is all so beautiful.#[ humans. ] you think humans are weak. yeah; their bodies lack the physical ability of demons; but they posses something that demons don't.#[ demons. ] he understands love; so he'll make it fine as a human. the only things i choose to exterminate are demons.#[ rebellion. ] i always wondered; why did my father give me the rebellion? if the yamato can separate man from devil…#[ sword of sparda. ] he split his power in three parts. one bore his own name; the second blade was named to embody retaliation...#[ yamato. ] ... and the final blade was named to embody a god of death.#[ sparda. ] why do you refuse to gain power? the power of our father sparda? / father? i don't have a father.#[ eva. ] she loved humanity; a demon and her children. it's far out of reach now; that warm smile from my childhood.#[ vergil. ] jackpot! -- why you gotta leave me hangin'? we used to love saying that. / i have no recollection.#[ nero. ] i should thank you. / that'd be out of character. maybe you should just throw an insult my way instead. / that sounds better.#[ patty. ] well patty; if I'm not mistaken this is one time that i might owe you a little thank you.#[ trish. ] if you get sick of it; you can always come back here. / why that's uncharacteristically kind of you.#[ lady. ] can i come along? / do what you want. but don't expect to get paid.#[ morrison. ] damn; you make me wait forever and then you go making selfish requests. / sorry.#[ v. ] for a second there I thought you were gonna shish kabob me. / i know how stubborn you can be.#[ mundus. ] again i must face a sparda. strange fate; isn't it? / strange and ironic that it will end the same way.#[ syd. ] well then strong and gentle lord dante of the 'real soul.' you'll let me live even now; won't you? just like you did before.
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esoteric-goblin · 4 months
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on worldbuilding, and what people think is going on
there is one facet of fantasy worldbuilding that is, to me, the most interesting and essential but i don't see it come up in worldbuilding guides or writing prompts or anything, and that is the question of:
what do the inhabitants of your world believe about how the world works, and how are they wrong? a lot of fantasy media will set up their cosmology, gods, magic systems, planar systems, concepts of the afterlife, &c., and proceed as though the inhabitants of the world know and understand them.
from someone whose entire academic career is focused on studying human culture in various regions and time periods, with a focus on belief systems (religion, occultism, mythology, folklore): that sort of worldbuilding is unrealistic and missing out on so much fun.
people are always seeking new understanding about how the world works, and they are mostly wrong. how many models of the solar system were proposed before we reached our current one? look at the long, turbulent history of medicine and our various bizarre models for understanding the human body and how to fix it. so many religions and occult/magical traditions arise from people disagreeing with or adapting various models of the world based on new ideas, methods, technologies. many of them are wrong, but all of them are interesting and reflect a lot about the culture, beliefs, values, and fears of the people creating/practising them.
there is so much more to the story of what people believe about the world than just what is true.
to be clear: i think it's fine and important for the author to have a coherent explanation for where magic comes from or who the gods are, so they can maintain consistency in their story. but they should also be asking what people in the world (especially different people, in different regions/nations and different times) think is happening when they do magic, or say a prayer, or practise medicine, or grieve their dead. it is a rich vein for conflict between individuals and nations alike when two models of the world disagree. it is fascinating how different magic systems might develop according to different underlying beliefs.
personally, i think it is the most fun to spawn many diverse models of the world, but give none of them the 'right' answer.
(bonus points if you also have a thriving academic system in the world with its own theory, research, and discourse between factions! as an academic, it is very fun to imagine fictional academic debate over the topics i'm worldbuilding. sometimes i will be working out details for some underlying mechanic of the world and start imagining the papers being written by scholars researching it)
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thagomizersshow · 8 months
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Apes are a kind of monkey, and that's ok
This is a pet peeve of mine in sci comm ESPECIALLY because many well respected scientific institutions are insistent about apes and monkeys being separate things, despite how it's been established for nearly a century that apes are just a specific kind of monkey.
Nearly every zoo I've visited that houses apes has a sign somewhere like the one below that explains the supposed distinction between the two groups, focusing on anatomy instead of phylogeny.
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(Every time I see a graphic like this I age ten years) Movies even do this, especially when they want to sound credible. Take this scene from Rise of the Planet of the Apes:
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This guy Franklin is presented as the authority on apes in this scene, and he treats James Franco calling a chimpanzee a monkey like it's insulting.
But when you actually look at a primate family tree, you can see that apes are on the same branch as Old World monkeys, while New World monkeys branched off much earlier.
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(I'm assuming bushbabies are included as "lorises" here?)
To put it simply, that means you and I are more closely related to a baboon than a baboon is to a capuchin.
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Either the definition of monkey includes apes OR we can keep using an anatomical definition and Barbary macaques get to be an ape because they're tailless.
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"I've got no tails on me!"
SO
Why did all this happen? Why did we start insisting apes are monkeys, especially considering the two words were pretty much interchangeable for centuries? Well I've got one word for ya...
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This the attitude that puts humans on a pedestal over other life on Earth. That there are intrinsically important features of humanity, and other living things are simply stepping stones in that direction.
At the dawn of evolutionary study, anthropocentrism was enforced by using a model called evolutionary grades. And boy howdy do I hate evolutionary grades.
Basically, a grade is a way of defining a group of animals by using anatomical "complexity". It's the idea that evolution has milestones of importance that, once reached, makes an organism into a new kind of thing. You can almost think of it like evolutionary levels. An animal "levels up" once it gains a certain trait deemed "complex".
You can probably see the issue here; that complexity is an ephemeral idea defined through subjectivity, rather than based off anything truly observable. What makes walking on 2 legs more complex than walking on four? How are tails less complex than no tails? "Complexity" in this context is unmeasurable, therefore it is unscientific. That's why evolutionary grades suck and I never want to look at one.
For primates, this meant once some of them lost their tails, grew bigger brains, and started brachiating instead of leaping, they simply "leveled up" and became apes. Despite the early recognition that apes were simply a branch of the Old World monkey family tree (1785!), the idea of grades took precedent over the phylogenetic link.
In the early years of primatology, humans were even seen as a grade "above" apes, related but separated by our upright stance and supposed far greater intelligence (this was before other apes were recognized tool users).
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It wasn't until the goddamn 1970s that it was recognized all great apes should be included in the clade Hominidae alongside humanity. This was a major shift in thinking, and required not just science, but the public, to recognize just how close we are to other living species. It seems like this change has, thankfully, happened and most institutions and science respecting folks have accepted this fact. Those who don't accept it tend to have a lot more issues with science than only accepting humans as apes.
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And now, we come to the current problem. Why is there a persistent idea that monkeys and apes are separate?
I want to make it clear I don't believe there was a conscious movement at play here. I think there's a lot of things going on, but there isn't some anti-monkey lobby that is hiding the truth. I think the problem is more complicated and deals with how human brains and human culture often struggle to do too many changes at once.
Now, I haven't seen any studies on this topic, so everything I say going forward is based on my own experience of how people react to learning apes (and therefore, humans) are monkeys.
First off, there is a lot of mental rearranging you have to do to accept humans as monkeys. First you, gotta accept humans as apes, then you have to stop thinking in grades and look at the family tree. Then you have to accept that apes are on the Old World monkey branch, separate from the New World monkeys.
That's a lot of steps, and I've seen science-minded zoo educators struggle with that much mental rearranging. And even while they accept this to an extent, they often find it even harder to communicate these ideas to the public.
I think this is a big reason why zoos and museums often push this idea the hardest. Convincing the public humans are apes is already a challenge, teaching them that all apes are monkeys at the same time might seem impossible.
I believe the other big reason people cling to the "apes-aren't-monkeys" idea is that it still allows for that extra bit of comforting anthropocentrism. Think of it this way; anthropocentrism puts humans on a pedestal. When you learn that humans are apes, you can either remove the pedestal and place humans with other animals, OR, you can place the apes up on the pedestal with humanity. For those that have an anthropocentric worldview, it can actually be easier to "uplift" the apes than ditch the pedestal.
Too make things worse, monkeys are such a symbol of a "primitive" animal nature that many can't accept raising them to the "level" of humanity, but removing the pedestal altogether is equally painful. So they hold tight to an outdated idea despite all the evidence. This is why there's often offense taken when an ape is called a monkey. It's tantamount to someone calling you a monkey, and that's too much of a challenge to anthropocentrism.
Personally, I think recognizing myself as a monkey is wonderful. Non-ape monkeys are as "complex" as any ape. They make tools, they have dynamic social groups, they're adapted to a wide range of environments, AND they have the best hair of all primates.
I think we should be honored to be considered one of them.
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help-itrappedmyself · 1 month
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Dead On Main part 7
Masterpost
dedicated to @cervinebotanist and @leafyeyes417 for responding so quickly and with such enthusiasm to part 6. Thank you for the encouragement and support.
Danny takes a deep breath. He can hear scrambling from somewhere else in the car, but he can’t pay attention to what’s happening as he focuses inward. He closes his eyes, and reaches inside himself.
Jason has a tiny baby core! Danny almost coos at it, but it’s so underdeveloped that he’s sad instead. Danny can feel ectoplasm in himself, in Jason’s body. But it isn’t enough. This ectoplasm has been reused, reduced, recycled one too many times. It’s got barely enough to stay alive left in it. Jason is mostly being sustained by his human half right now. It feels like play-doh that turns to dust where it should stretch, dried-out and old. It makes him even more sad. And slightly ill. But the sadness makes the rioting ectoplasm calm back down inside him.
Danny opens his eyes. He’s slightly disoriented, but calm now, eyes no longer glowing. They had stopped the car. He looks at Tim, who is leaning against his door and braced against it and Dick’s chair, giving Danny as much space as possible. His hand is almost on the door handle and his tablet on the floor. Dick and Bruce are exchanging panicked looks in the front seat, both now unbuckled for some reason and completely turned to face the backseat.
“Hey, speaking of ectoplasm, this body really needs some.” Danny informs them. “If it doesn’t get some new ectoplasm soon his core is going to cease functioning, and that would be really bad, and possibly irreversible.” 
“Uhhh.” Dick’s panicked look is turning straight to confusion, as is everyone else’s. “What?” 
“I didn’t realize that Jason was, I mean he had mentioned he died, but he- well, I guess I didn’t want to talk about it over the phone either. Does make it easier to talk about since we’re the same, but of course we couldn’t have known yet. But his core needs some help, do you not have access to ectoplasm back home?” Danny is rambling, brain spinning at the thought of how much he and Jason have in common. This big thing that no one else would truly understand by each other. And Vlad, sort of, but nobody likes Vlad. “It’s amazing that we ended up soulmates. He’s only the third person in the world I’ve even heard about with this condition. How long has he been without ectoplasm? Is he having trouble finding any, or does he not know he needs it? Either way, I’m giving him some as soon as possible.” Danny doesn’t know whether he should freak out over that fact that his soulmate is as dead as he is, that he’s currently dying from lack of ecto, or that his soulmate’s entire family is probably going to end up learning about him and ghosts, or the fact that he is currently taking another body that the GIW is going to want to study straight to them. All of these things seem like great reasons to freak out on their own, so all together he is just panicking.
Danny doesn’t seem to be able to breathe. 
“Hey, come on, that’s fine, you can totally give Jason some… ectoplasm.” Dick says.
“Danny, you have to breathe, okay.” Tim is much calmer than Dick, so Danny focuses on him as Bruce and Dick whisper in the front. “Danny, match my breathing.” Danny stares at Tim, who is making very exaggerated breathing movements, and tries to time his breathing to match. “We’ll figure everything out, but we don’t need to do it right now.” Tim is still helping Danny, talking calmly, but he says this with enough force to distract the two in the front seat enough for them to shut up for a second. Danny appreciates the bit of silence.
“You need to start driving.” Danny, tells Bruce. “Right now, his human half is sustaining the rest of him almost entirely. If Jason doesn’t get more ecto soon, his other half will die, and I’m not sure what will happen to his human side if that happens. He may die again completely.”
There’s a beat of silence in the car. Bruce stares right into Danny’s eyes.
“You are saying there is an active threat to my son’s life, ” Bruce asks, voice hard. 
Danny nods. Then everyone is buckled back in and Bruce is pulling them back onto the road. 
“You know what’s happening and how to help him?” Bruce asks, voice steady but Danny can sense all the emotion underneath. Bruce is really worried right now, he looks around the car and realizes that Dick and Tim are as well. They both have phones out, but are tense, tuned into his conversation with Bruce.
“Yeah, It’s a simple enough fix, I’m just worried because he’s really…” Danny takes a moment to think of the right word. “Ecto deficient? His core is definitely malnourished, and his body and mind definitely need it. They are being sustained with human stuff for now, but eventually that won’t be enough.” 
“How urgent is this?”
Danny feels for Jason’s core, feeling like he’s invading his privacy, but without other options to check. It’s not cracked, but it’s not fully formed either. Half starved baby core, not even strong enough to present. Its link to an obsession is strong, but frayed enough that Danny can’t tell what it is. The core is not strong enough to produce it’s own ecto, even in response to the obsession being fulfilled. Everything is stable, but strained.
“I’m not an expert, but he’s sustained himself this long. And we’re already on the way. We should be fine, but I’ll keep an eye on it just in case.”
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harunayuuka2060 · 8 months
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Diavolo: *reading MC's resignation letter*
Diavolo: ...
Diavolo: What's the reason, MC? You've been doing so well.
MC: *gives him a tired smile* I am exhausted. That's the only reason I have.
Diavolo: Then I'll give you days to rest. I won't approve this resignation.
MC: ...
MC: I would ask you to reconsider.
Diavolo: ...
Barbatos: MC, the young master has his priorities in line. Would you mind waiting for his answer?
MC: ...
MC: I'll try. Please excuse me. *then takes their leave*
Diavolo: ...
Diavolo: What happened to them, Barbatos?
Barbatos: It seems you haven't received the news yet, my lord. Regarding the recent event.
Diavolo: What is it?
MC: *is finishing up all the remaining work in the House Of Lamentation*
The brothers (except Lucifer): *who have been observing them*
Asmo: Mammon, this is your chance now to apologize. You too, Levi, Belphie.
Mammon: Wh-Why do I need to apologize?! It was their fault they got shoved off the railing!
Mammon: They could've used their magic to stop us, y'know!
Satan: Mammon, you idiot—
MC: ...
MC: *walks silently to the other room*
Mammon: ...
Levi: I think they're still mad...
Belphie: We should let them cool down first. I'll approach them when they're no longer mad at us.
Beel: I'll buy them some food. That will make them feel better.
Asmo: Mammon, your only job is to apologize and you can't do it right.
Asmo: Why do you always have to use that non-existent pride of yours? It's getting annoying.
Mammon: Huh?! Who's annoying?!
MC: *enters Lucifer's study*
Lucifer: MC—
MC: I'm done with all the chores.
Lucifer: ...
Lucifer: I see. Why don't you take a seat first?
MC: I would like to, but we would only be wasting each other's time.
MC: I'm only here to inform you that I will not be working here starting tomorrow.
Lucifer: ...
Lucifer: Diavolo didn't approve your resignation.
MC: But that can't stop me from leaving.
Lucifer: MC, you're being unreasonable right now.
MC: Maybe I am. Though I can't deny to myself that I'm really exhausted.
MC: I'm exhausted from all of this.
MC: All I want is to leave and get away.
Lucifer: ...
Lucifer: If it is the power you need, I'll give it to you.
MC: ...
MC: I've already given up on that.
MC: I choose to be an ordinary human this time.
Lucifer: ...
Solomon: ...
Solomon: You're just going to leave me?
MC: I'm sorry, Solomon. You must be disappointed with me right now.
Solomon: ...
Solomon: No. I was never disappointed and never will be.
Solomon: I understand why you're doing this.
Solomon: *hugs MC* However, if it's fine with you, I want to join you in the human world.
Solomon: This is a different timeline. And I want to keep you safe.
MC: ...
MC: *hugs him back* Wouldn't it be great if I could really take you with me?
Solomon: MC...
MC: Thank you, Solomon. I won't ever forget you.
Barbatos: Are you certain about your decision?
MC: Yes.
Barbatos: ...
Barbatos: You're aware that I would never disobey the young master.
MC: *smiles* I apologize for the trouble, Barbatos.
MC: I hope one day, I can make it up to you.
Barbatos: ...
Barbatos: *smiles back* I'll be hoping for that as well.
Solomon: ...
Solomon: MC? What happened to you?
MC: *forced a smile* I had an accident. *has an injured leg*
Solomon: You should've called me instead of forcing yourself to walk here.
MC: ...
MC: Solomon, it's completely gone now.
Solomon: *looks at them, shocked* What?
MC: I almost died today. The brothers got rowdy again and... I accidentally got pushed off the railing. *chuckles* Good thing there was a soft cushion below.
Solomon: MC...
MC: ...
MC: If only you have seen their confused faces...
Solomon: ...
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andhumanslovedstories · 5 months
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I’m genuinely surprised how much I love nursing. Every shift, I get to meet and help so many people. I’m float pool so I go to the whole hospital, but I’ve also been floating for a while so everywhere is familiar. Sometimes it’s hard for me to walk through the hospital because I know so many people I pass, and we keep stopping to chat. I float to seventeen different units. That’s crazy! I know so much about the hospital! Every night I’m somewhere else, working with a different team and a different group of patients. The constant novelty and familiarity of floating is delicious.
And I love my patients! I know this all sounds so goody two shoes, but I love that I get to help so many people in so many ways. I only get them for one night, so I try to give them my best. I love tucking people in with warm blankets, I love explaining what I’m assessing to a patient with a new diagnosis, I love having heart to hearts with patients at three am when they can’t sleep, I love making people hurt less and stop throwing up. And you can be a real scamp about it. I love stealing snacks from other floors. I love when a patient is like “god I’d love some chocolate” and I get to be like “sir I know the location of every candy drawer in the hospital, I can get you some chocolate.” Or like figuring out like a cheat code for alleviating symptoms. When someone’s like “wow this heating pack rules” and then falls asleep instantly? It feels good and it’s fun. I have a lot of fun figuring out how to cheer up my patients in minor little stupid ways.
I never have to wonder if my job contributes value to the world. When I go home at the end of my shift, I can always think of something I did that makes me feel proud. That rules! It’s so fun to be proud of yourself! It’s so fun to know that what you do matters and that you are doing it well. And if I don’t feel proud, I have a drive home to think about why and I get a chance to do better next shift. And that’s good too. There are nights where I can feel the way I let someone down, and I have to sit with that, and I have to learn from it.
(And I don’t want to sound like I’m crushing it always super-nurse style, like I’m completely immune to ableism and the other -isms, or that I’m never lazy or callous or checked out. I’m new and I’m learning and I’m human and I’m tired and I’m not always living up to the person I hope to be. But I do get a lot of opportunities to make up for it and try again. That feels good.)
And I love teaching new nurses! I love having to constantly keep studying so I can be in a position to teach anyone anything. I love watching people get better at stuff. And I love that as I’ve gotten more confident as a nurse and a person who trains new nurses that I’ve started coaching more and more on the soft skills of nurses. Those are really hard! We should get as much practice with therapeutic communication as we do with Foley catheters!
Also where I work pays good, and I’ve got great job security, dude, I can buy so many stupid little trinkets. I was so nervous when I decided to go to nursing school that I was fucking up my life and other people’s plans for a job I wouldn’t even end up liking. I’d literally never worked something remotely close to healthcare when I decided to go to nursing school. I’d been in a hospital like once. I feel like this big life change shouldn’t have worked out nearly as well as it has, but hey it’s really fuckin cool it did
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star-anise · 10 months
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The thing about "parents' rights" and "protect the children [from hearing that other ways of life than ours are possible and okay]" is that it is literally, in the purest sense of the word, patriarchy.
The word literally means "rule by the fathers". We're generally used to hearing it describe how adult women can be dominated by adult men. However, that's not where patriarchy ends; feminists have been less eager to address how within that system, women can exercise power and domination of their own through the traditional gender roles of motherhood. Their maternal rights to power and dominance may have traditionally been lesser than paternal ones, but they were never less than their minor children's. Even single-mother or female-only families can be, in this sense, patriarchal.
Patriarchal families are a complex system that grants parents complete legal and practical control over nearly every aspect of their children's lives. The patriarchal family controls where the child lives, who takes care of them, what rules they have to follow, how they are educated, who they associate with, what healthcare they receive, what religion they practice, and whether they can work or control any money they earn or that is given to or for them.
Normally discussions of patriarchy are a lot more abstract. But right now it's very concrete and real: we are fighting to limit the family's control over children on issues where we can observe that families sometimes tend to make decisions that are bad for the children's welfare or that disrespect their human rights.
Whether a minor child can get an abortion. Whether they can receive gender-affirming care. Whether it's okay to lie or coerce your child to ensure they follow your religion. Whether they deserve to be educated about factual histories or scientific theories that are necessary to understanding the world around them. Whether they deserve to learn accurate, age-appropriate information about consent, setting boundaries, how their bodies and the bodies of other people work, what a normal range of gender and sexual identities look like, what healthy or unhealthy relationships look like, and what sex is, how it works, what its positives and negatives are, and how they might navigate the world, whether or not they ever want to have it.
Hell, on some levels we're still arguing about whether it's okay to hit your kids, or whether children have the right, similar to the rights adults have, not to be assaulted or abused.
Because there are a LOT of people who say: No. Parents should have 100% control over any or all of those issues. If the parent says no, the child is not allowed to do or have any of those things, and nobody else should be allowed to interfere and provide them to the child without their parents' consent.
Pointing this out often results in parents saying, "Oh, so you want just ANYONE to be able to go up and talk sex with kids? You want kids to be able to decide to jump off cliffs with nobody stopping them???" As though parents are the single protective force in the universe, the only thing standing between their child and the ravages of absolute chaos.
On the contrary: most of the time the argument is for children to receive care and guidance from adults who are monitored to ensure they treat children in safe and appropriate ways, who have spent many years studying the best and most rigorously tested of our collective understanding of how to prepare children for happy, healthy lives.
And we are arguing against people who believe that the only important qualification needed to refuse children that kind of care is to be ranked above them in their family hierarchy.
In conclusion...
Fuck the patriarchy. Children have human rights too.
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etheries1015 · 10 months
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I'm not sure if requests are open or not but can I have more content on Twisted Wonderland x Obey Me. No preferences really, it can be anything like the demon boys reactions or even the reactions of our Twisted Wonderland acquaintances.
Maybe the reader could successfully summon one of the boys?
If requests are not open please ignore this.
Requests are always open, because I kinda pick and choose what I like to write and what I don't...so no worries! Thank you for submitting this request! I had a lot of people ask me to write another part about twst x obey me so...
click here for: Pt 1
Twisted wonderland X Obey me crossover where MC goes to twisted wonderland from obey me but has their full range of magical powers.
Only problem is, you finally figured out how to use it to summon the brothers, but now you had a whole other issue upon your hands.
TW: None
General warnings: Gender neutral reader, probably a lot of OOC moments, but I tried!
The day you managed to get in contact with Lucifer was well deserved. You had read and practiced all sorts of magic in your free time, Endless sleepless nights studying, and practicing. And it all has to do with...that mirror. You had managed to contact Micky through the mirror who lived in another world, so why not try contacting the brothers the same way? With a few sigils and a couple other magic tools given to you over time at NRC, you chanted your summoning ritual and the mirror glowed brightly. Next thing you knew, Lucifer was standing in the mirror in front of you.
"Lucif-"
"(Y/NNNNN)!!!" A bunch of voices cried out. Your magic worked a little...too well, because the next thing you knew you were being tackled by a hug. Err...many hugs. They had actually stepped out of the mirror, Asmodeus chocking you in a hug and twirling you around with tears streaming down his face.
"Asmo- Asmo stop! You guys can't-" you tried to warn them to go back through the mirror, however it was too late. The mirror returned to its normal state, and you now stood in your dorm room with 7 demons all in tow. Stuck there.
This can't possibly be good.
But luckily, with you somehow managing to break the laws of magic in Twisted Wonderland, all of the brothers were able to use their full range of magic. Including you.
Their reactions:
Lucifer
"Let me talk to the manager." After he finally sees that you are safe and sound feeling a wave of relief, he is immediately on the mission. He wants to speak to Crowley, which you tried to explain was...difficult. But this is Lucifer we are talking about, anything is possible with him around.
The moment he sees Crowley, he internally groans. The things you had said about him were indeed true, he was avoidant of your issues and was trying his best to downplay the problem at hand.
"How were they able to summon such magical beings...According to the dark mirror, (y/n) should be absolutely powerless, an average human with no merits." Crowley had said.
Lucifer was startled at this accusation, so what you had said about them not taking you seriously due to your lack of magical aptitude in this world...was correct as well. This made his blood boil, however he didn't feel the need to defend you. He knew you would have shown your worth regardless of this hiccup, he had full faith in your abilities in personality, despite what they believed to be "useless" or not.
Easily threatens Crowley. He demands you be given a proper living space with accommodations without treating you as some sort of slave to his issues, despite being under the impression that you had no way of using magic to assist you in your endeavors. You had dealt with him and his brothers enough, why must you be burdened with NRC students issues?
Crowley almost shit his pants bro. When lucifer went into his demon form, Crowley shrunk down in his shoes. The other teachers were the same honestly, they were also present during this meeting. They couldn't bring themselves to fight against the large wingged and horned man that emmited such power before them.
"You dare allow my little sheep to live with such horrible conditions and treated them with such avoidance... I suggest figure out a way to make up for what you have done. I also highly suggest you find a way for all of us to return, it is indeed your fault or whatever "magic mirror" that called upon (Y/N) that had made this mistake. I presume you will work with us to fix this issue?"
"Of course!" Crowley exasperated with a laugh of nervousness, "I promise! However, it is no small expense to-" No. Lucifer was not playing around. He was easily able to keep any big emotions in check, however when it comes to you...
"you WILL assist us. Or you can say goodbye to this school you call 'Night Raven College'- " A ball of light of immense magic began to swirl around his hand and his eyes glowed with deadly intent.
He left the building with a smile of success, leaving behind the teachers almost shitting themselves.
after settling business with Crowley, he ran to you. He had to make up for the lost time of course! You wouldn't be able to leave his grasp for a long while afterwards.
When you tried to ask what he spoke to Crowley about, he simply smiled and told you not to worry, he had it all handled. For now, he wanted to hold you in his arms, it's been a while since he had seen you after all, he needed to recharge.
Mammon
"Mannn, is there anything to do in this run down place?" He put up his feet on the table of the ramshackle dorm lounge, you were caught in his grasp. He had been holding onto you ever since he went through the mirror.
"Please don't cause me trouble here, too." You groaned, bags underneath your eyes, "This situation is bad as is, it's probably best you-"
There was a knock on the door. You sighed and got up, opening the door before revealing Azul. Your eyes widened, you totally forgot you offered to help at the Monstro lounge today!
"Hah? Who's this?" Mammon stood behind you looking down at Azul, who was equally as shocked to see him. But he quickly got over it, shaking his head before returning his gaze towards you.
"I believe we had a deal (y/n)..." Azul said with a glint in his glasses, "You had promised to help out today. Our prefect wouldn't flake out on their duties, would they?" Azul went to grab your hand to drag you out, however Mammon quickly grasped his wrists roughly with eyes slitted in annoyance.
"Who are ya and what do ya think you're doing putting your hands on what's mine?" He growled. You rolled your eyes and slapped your face. Here he goes. You can already tell where this is going.
"yours?" Azul shook his head in shock, "Huh? And you don't look like a student here," Azul pointed out, pulling his hand back from mammon, "Anyhow. Are you saying you will take the Prefects place instead? What would you have to offer me? Prefect is rather popular here despite their lack of magical abilities, and having them would really boost our sales for the week-"
"lack of magical abilities? what are ya on about? My (y/n) is super powerful!" Azul stared blankly before looking at you with doubt in his eyes. You turned your gaze away and sighed in defeat, you knew there was no way he would believe what Mammon had said.
"Well. Magic or no magic, I need somebody to take the job (y/n) had promised. I have a business to run, after all-"
"Oh so you're a business man, huh? Well look no further! I'm the Great Mammon, I have a lot of experience in these things. I'm a total cash grab, a model-"
Mammon went on about his accomplishments and proudly declared he was willing to make a deal with Azul, something you tried to talk him out of, but it was too late. He was already signing the scroll.
"Mammon!" You growled, "You are not listening to a single thing i'm- you know what, whatever. You do what you wanna do. Good luck."
Que Mammon being dragged off to do his manual labor...he will learn the hard way like he always does. Oh well. Leave it to Mammon to run off as soon as he arrived to try and make a deal with the worst person possible!
Leviathan
Hugging you so tightly. He missed you so much! But boredom soon took over. He had no idea what to do, you have no video games, not even a T.V In the lounge! How could you have possibly lived this way?!
"Here, I can call up Idia. He's probably the best person who-"
"You found a gaming replacement?!" Levi whined, "I thought you were my player two! But now you're staying up all night playing games and watching anime with someone else..."
You lightly punched the top of his head. "I didn't, you idiot!" You laughed, "We play games, sure, but you'll always be my player 1. I just don't want you to get bored while you're here."
You called Idia and he was so so so so so reluctant to do it. But it's you, of course. How could he say no? Ortho also did some convincing, saying it's good to find another recluse like Idia. But the trade off was you had to be there too.
Dude. They played games for HOURS in the Ignyhide dorm lounge, and you probably forgot something pretty important...
Idia was a gamer unmatched. Not even Levi could beat him at a lot of these pvp games, and began to become unnerved.
"Bro lol you're such a noob, hey (y/n) I thought you said this guy was good at games, why'd you send this guy? He's practically a normie-"
No way he just said that. THAT was Levis breaking point.
He summoned Lotan
He flooded the entire lounge
You had forced him to submit, and Idia was just staring....wide eyed...what the hell just happened...?
"You can use magic this entire time?!" Idia called out in shock after witnessing you submitting Lotan and Leviathan to your call. Levi did make note of this, however was far too upset and preoccupied by cleaning up his mess before he could mention anything about it.
He was banned very quickly, but now thanks to the giant sea monster, he really piqued the Leech twins curiosity (who happened to be in the mirror chamber at the time, when Lotan escaped Ignyhide and also flooded the chamber of mirrors.) Jade asked Levi to study Lotan and Floyd started admiring Levis Demon form. He's never seen such a cool tail from any creature before!
Levi was on house arrest. You wouldn't permit him to leave ramshackle, but he surprisingly made good and quick friends with the brothers. They were all quickly learning how to sew little outfits, which jade really enjoyed. Floyd was occupied by asking Levi all sorts of questions about Lotan and begging to touch Levis tail, before falling asleep out of boredom on the couch.
They managed to stay entertained with each others company somehow, but it worked out.
Satan
You knew he would be best occupied in the Library, where there was an entire pile of books he had never seen before. He was in heaven. How you managed to get him into the building without him being an authorized student? Crowley gave them temporary access, thanks to Lucifers (threats) negotiations.
He began going through each shelf and picking a bunch of books that looked interesting. He was mainly interested in the magic of this world
He emptied an entire book shelf and huddled into a corner surrounded by a mess of books.
Riddle came in to witness this, and was NOT happy.
"What do you think you are doing?" He confronted Satan. Satan glanced up and was at first upset he was interrupted, however seeing riddle...
"Cat..." Satans mouth dropped open
"Cat? excuse me? What is that supposed to mean?" Riddle folded his arms, "No matter. You are supposed to check out these books before utilizing them, and you do not look like a student here. As house warden of Heartslabyul I demand you put these back, or it's off with your head!"
Satan TRIED to explain to him in a civilized way that he was a special guest of the prefect and was given access to as many books as he desired, but Riddle did not believe him. and demanded some form of proof. Satan did not take well to this.
"I'm not going to take demands from a small cat such as yourself. I suggest you find someone else to bother," Satan returned to his book now ignoring Riddle.
"W-wha...EXCUSE ME?!" Riddle yelled, his face turned a bright red and pulled out his wand, "OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!" Next thing Satan knew he had a heart shaped lock around his neck.
He REALLYYY did not like that. The green aura that surrounded him startled Riddle as Satan stood up towering over him, demon form and all.
"I swear I-" He bared his teeth and raised his hand, before someone yelling "SATAN, SIT!" Caused him to gasp in shock and fall to the ground with a heavy 'thud', something that surprised Riddle.
You ran over and sighed shaking your head. You apologized to Riddle and explained the situation, to which Riddle took off the collar he had given Satan.
"Don't worry, Riddle. I will make sure I check out every one of these books and return them accordingly, I will take them to ramshackle for now as to not cause another...scene and disturb the other students."
Riddle was mildly satisfied with this answer and allowed you to do so, not without mumbling about being called a small cat...but no matter.
"how were you able to do that, Prefect? You made him submit," Riddle pointed out, "Without any magical power," He began to say. Satan quickly interrupted with a tilt of his head and a "Huhh??"
"(y/n) Is one of the most powerful human sorcerers," He pointed out, "Solomon is teaching them himself. They have plenty of magical aptitude," He told Riddle, much to his dismay.
You sighed and ignored the topic and Riddles confusion, dragging the pile of books to check out and leaving the library as fast as possible.
Satan spent the rest of the time in ramshackle sitting in a dorm room he found himself, and read to his hearts content. Not without asking you many questions about this world and the contents of some of these books
Asmodeus
The first one to hug you and twirl you around, and had a very hard time letting go.
When he finally did let go, he was nitpicking about everything.
"Oh my dear just look at those bags underneath your eyes! And that uniform...you just look horrible,"
"Yeah. not the first I've heard that," You sighed. When Asmodeus asked you to elaborate, you explained to him about Vil, the super star of NRC, and the person who liked to remind you how to care for your appearance.
Asmo was upset at first, until he met Vil. Annnddd fell in love. Until Vil pointed out Asmos "strange" choice of outfit, being his school uniform from devildom.
Asmo scowled at this and gave Vil a run down of every flaw Vil had, in the end, Vil actually began to see he was similar to Rook in a way, very observant in a persons design and look. Although Asmo did not have much tact about it.
"(y/n), how did you manage to become friends with such a magical person? He's practically oozing with magical charm," Vil pointed out. Not without Asmos confusion.
"What do you mean?" Asmo asked, "We have a pact! They are rather powerful, one of the many things I absolute love about our (y/n)~" Before you could explain further to Vil what Asmo meant, Rook had walked into the room.
ROOK. FELL. IN. LOVE. WITH. ASMO. Bro was enamored, he was shocked, jaw dropping, and eyes widening. He made it almost his life's mission to discover EVERYTHING about Asmodeus.
"Monsieur! I beg of you, let me study you!" he cried out, "I've never seen someone as mangnifique as you!"
Bruh. Right in front of Vil? Vil was kind of offended to be honest, but Asmo... he was loving this. Finally, somebody here that could appreciate true beauty!
Rook started listing everything he loved about Asmo, and when he asked Asmo where he was from and Asmo mentioned he was a demon, Rook lost. His. Mind.
Asmo went into his demon form, ironically this is when Epel walked in.
"What in tarnation is THAT?!" He cried out in his thick southern accent. Asmo did not like that.
"What do you mean THAT?" He scoffed, going up to Epel.
"Who's this sparkly lookin' guy with the horns? ya don't look like a fae to me..." vil scolded him for using such words, but Epel couldn't help it! He was beyond surprised at this being standing before him in his dorms lounge!
Asmodeus was pretty close to using his charm upon Epel, probably to convince Epel that he was as amazing as Rook pointed him out to be, but you quickly got involved and forced Asmo to stop.
"It's not that big of a deal," You sighed, "We all know how amazing our Asmo is..."
Anyway a little bit of back and forth, and all of the sudden Vil Rook and Asmo were all sitting in a circle like a bunch of little girls at a sleepover talking about Musical theatre, Beauty, and everything else that involved Asmo talking about himself. you and Epel were quickly used as their own little dress up dolls, they managed to find a way to occupy the time by having competitions on which party could make you and Epel look the best with what techniques.
Beelzebub
Coming through that Mirror on an empty stomach was such a bad idea. But not to fear! You knew the perfect person to help!
Trey. you had to beg Trey to make as many desserts as he could and that Beel would be probably the best person to taste test all sorts of things he baked. Trey honestly took you up on this, and whipped up a bunch of things he had been itching to try.
"They are really good, but Lukes treats are the best," Beel said with his mouth full of tart. He began to pick apart what was good and what was bad about every dessert he tried, however that did not satiate his hunger. He was so excited to try every single new thing that this world had to offer.
You guys ended up going to Scarabia, where Kalim was more than happy to share his culture and their food. Jamil ended up cooking a meal fit for a king as asked by Kalim. Kalim and Beel got along so well it was kind of sweet to watch....but eventually the food was all out in a matter of minutes, and Jamil had to talk some sense into Kalim.
"He has a healthy appetite! It's amazing, isn't it Jamil? Haha!"
Jamil was not very amused. It was obvious he was exhausted, so you all parted and said your goodbyes.
Ace Deuce Grim and you ended up going into town and stopping at the most popular restaurants.
"this guy is real beefed up, how did you manage to get so much muscle with an appetite like that?" Ace pointed out. Deuce agreed enthusiastically.
They spent probably two hours asking about all sorts of sports in Devildom and exercises, until Jack walked in and walked over.
"Jack!" You smiled. He walked over and greeted everyone with a gentle "hello," Before introducing him to Beel.
"I wonder who would win in an athletic battle between you guys," Grim pointed out. Their bets were on Jack, but of course you knew better than that. You knew Beel would win by a landslide.
they headed to Savanawclaw, and even Leona ended up getting involved after seeing Beel standing next to you.
"Whos this guy?" He pointed at Beel. You guys introduced each other, and Jack explained that they were about to have an athletic competition. They were going to do runs, hurdles, push ups, pull ups...honestly everything.
"What about a Spell drive competition?" Jack suggested. Leona pointed out that it would not be evenly matched, as you were magicless and Beel wasn't even from here.
"Huh? (Y/N) isn't magicless," Beel defended you, "They are actually really powerful. I mean, enough to have pacts with all of my brothers, even Lucifer" He smiled at you and patted your head. Leona began to laugh at you two, not truly understanding what Beel meant by that. Beels friendly demeanor faltered and he frowned.
He was confident in your abilities, so Leona finally agreed to a spell drive contest. They explained the rules, and began. Leona started out so confident, but was quickly humbled the second Beel turned into his demon form and went all out.
You two walked out victorious, leaving an absolutely shell shocked Leona and Jack behind. You and Beel had perfect teamwork, and won by a landslide. You were even able to showcase some of your magical abilities, something else that was unprecedented by the two NRC students.
"Thank you for sticking up for me," You smiled at Beel, "It's been a while since somebody did that to me.. Even though I had to make you sit because you were using too much of your power. You were gonna destroy the disk!." Beel gave you a warm wide smile before picking you up and holding you into a up into a tight hug.
"I missed you, (y/n). And Nobody should talk bad about you like that!
Belphie
Joined you, Ace, Deuce, Grim, and Beel on your outing to eat. Although when you guys ended up splitting ways at the point when you guys left with Jack. Belphie quickly departed to find a good place to sleep at ramshackle. He found a perfect tree for this!
He ran into Malleus. Tall guy, big horns...
'Who're you?" Belphie asked, looking down at the tall Fae from the tree he found to sleep in. Malleus looked up in shock, his green eyes staring at Belphie.
"Are you a new student here?" Malleus inquired, "I wasn't aware that child of man was taking in new students at Ramshackle," He pointed out, folding his arms. Belphie had an unnerved feeling about this guy.
"What do you mean 'child of man'?" Belphie yawned, "Are you talking about (y/n)?"
"Yes, I am," Malleus said, "And you might be?"
"Belphegor, Avatar of Sloth. Why'd you call (y/n) that?" he frowned.
"Well (y/n) is a human," Malleus pointed out, "I suppose I grew up in a more traditional Fae household, so many of the humans we tend to call "child of man"..." Belphie had no clue what this guy was going on about, but decided it wasn't worth his time. He started to doze off again until Malleus pestered him with another question.
"I came here looking for (y/n), He called up to Belphie, "Might you know where they are?" Belphie began to become slightly irritated at this point. He jumped down from the tree and looked at Malleus in annoyance.
"Why do you wanna know where they are? they'll be back soon," he pointed out.
A little bit of back and forth and passive aggressiveness not gonna lie...it escalated to the point where Belphie became so agitated at this guy and his "fancy" way of talking and the fact malleus kept calling you "child of man" or whatever, he turned into his demon form.
"Oh? A duel?" Malleus chuckled, levitating slightly with his arm lifting up and magic swirling around his hand, "Shall I take it you-"
"Belphie, sit!" Belphie gasped and was suddenly dropped down to the ground, you and Beel walking up to them.
"Oh, hey Malleus. I'm sorry if he was bothering you...what was-"
"ugh. This is so annoying," Belphie growled, "this guy here was calling you weird nicknames, and said you were a magicless human," He pointed out. Malleus looked at you with slight surprise at witnessing you drop Belphie to his knees.
"you...can use magic?" He asked, "How come I was not aware of this?"
"Of course they can use magic, idiot!" Belphie hissed, standing back up and protectively moving to hug you from behind. His head lay upon the crook of your neck, glancing up at Malleus with a light smirk upon his features. He was trying to test him.
With his lips forming into a thin line of frustration, Malleus took a step forward, not without Belphie using his tail protectively in front of you as if warning him to stay back.
"I don't like this guy," He pouted to you. Your tired eyes rolled to the back of your head, giving another apology to Malleus.
~
The commotion soon got the attention of the other demons, who then gathered in the courtyard and demanding to know why everyone around them was trying to say you were magicless. After a little explaining, each of the brothers were less than forgiving. This entire time you were powerless, and the students had treated you differently for it? Malleus was kind enough to recount a lot of the things the headmaster had put on your shoulders, while you were trying your best to downplay it. A bunch of the other students had ended up gathering around ramshackle as well, witnessing Each and every one of the brothers now in their demon forms, the immense amount of magic traces had caused quite a stir among the students. Even the housewardens had shown up, hearing down the grapevine of the events that were unfolding. If you hadn't done something and done something fast, things could easily go south. So, you did what you thought was all you could do.
"SIT!" You yelled as loud as possible, each of the brothers dropping to the ground with a yelp. The magic power that was gathering around was now coming from...you. Murmurs were heard between the students, eyes of shock filling their eyes and unbelievable amount of students actually had pulled out their wands, obviously feeling threatened by your sudden showcase of strange magic they had never seen before.
"I'm afraid, my dear students, this has gone too far!" A voice cried out in the middle of the chaos. Crowley had walked between his students until he made it to you, staring down upon your figure with a look of annoyance and sigh.
Crowley declared there was a way for you to return home, and summoned the mirror in which you used to get them back in the first place. Lucifer couldn't help but scoff and sneer at the headmaster.
"Now, please explain, why have you suddenly found a way for us to return when you haven't been able to sort a way out in the year our (y/n) has been in this dreadful place?" He roared in anger. Crowley shrunk down and tried to laugh it off, playing it to be nothing short of a coincidence.
"Enough..." you sighed, annoyed, "Let's just get this over with and go back home."
"Indeed! what our prefect said! Although, you will be strongly missed, (y/n). You were incredibly helpful in dealing with- I mean- supporting our students! With you gone, I'm not sure what we will do! Oh Woe is me!"
Ignoring his obvious attempts to keep you there to handle his students, you said your final goodbyes to everyone you had made friendships with. However attached you may have gotten with these students, it was inevitable that you had to return to the Devildom, where you truly belong.
Thus ends your journey with Twisted Wonderland!
----
I'm sorry that ending was a little bit rushed, I was having a hard time figuring out how exactly to go about it! But, despite this, I hope you all enjoyed this despite it's length. If you have any more suggestions or ideas for a crossover, please let me know! I'd love to hear your thoughts and opinions.
i'm also so bad at writing belphie lol he's my least favorite brother ngl so i'm not that good at embodying his personality. L.
Check out my masterlist for more of my works!
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drdemonprince · 4 months
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By now, a majority of Autism researchers and clinicians are aware that the existing assessments for Autism are profoundly flawed. 
They know the standard evaluation of Autism is sexist, with assessors excluding women for reasons like wearing makeup, having a boyfriend, being superficially polite, or not being fixated on suitably ‘masculine’ topics like ancient Roman history or barometric pressure. 
They know Autism evaluations are racist, deeming Black Autistics “oppositionally defiant” or even “borderline” rather than acknowledging any social alienation or sensory pain they’re experiencing, and believing they must be overstating the difficulty they face in moving through the world.
And they certainly know that conventional Autism measures weren’t designed with adult Autistics in mind. Many of us are still asked to make up stories based on paintings of frogs in a toddler’s picture book, when we sit down for assessments at age 20, or 30, or 45 — because all the evaluation methods were written for young kids. 
The data has already proven the far-reaching consequences of using such shoddy measures of Autism. People of color, gender minorities, older adults, and women are diagnosed at later ages, and also go undiagnosed at massive rates. 
A growing population of scientists are admittedly interested in fostering a new literature of what they call “patient-driven” Autism research, but they never stop thinking of us as mere patients, the passive receivers of care rather than the leaders of communities and political movements who are the ought to be the primary authors of the studies about us, and the sole determinants of what our desired outcomes should be. Even when they observe that their work could benefit from a greater Autistic perspective, researchers do so from closed rooms, filled with other professionals who are largely not Autistic, wondering amongst themselves what it is that we want instead of learning to quiet their voices and follow our lead. 
Though many basically well-intentioned Autism researchers believe that Autism assessments need reform, what neurodiversity really needs is to abandon the diagnostic process altogether. If Autism is a benign, neutral, naturally occurring form of human difference that requires acceptance rather than a cure, then there’s no need to diagnose it as if it were a sickness. And if hundreds of thousands of Autistic women, people of color, queer people, and older people have been able to give a voice to ourselves and find one another without having ever been given a label by a professional, then improved professional labeling is not what we need. 
Autistic self-realization is the future of Autism assessment. We hold the collective wisdom, organizing ability, insight, and political power to define who we are. No authority figure should have to sign off on our identities. 
Because psychiatrists fail to diagnose such a large percentage of the Autistic population, many Autism researchers now accept self-identified Autistic adults within their subject pool. Within the peer-reviewed journal Autism in Adulthood, self-realized Autistics often make up the bulk of the participant sample, and they have repeatedly been found to be indistinguishable from their formally diagnosed peers. 
A growing body of research now also considers the presence of Autism-spectrum traits as qualifying for inclusion in many Autism studies. The data makes it quite obvious that Autistic people exist within all human groups, spread all throughout the world, and that a great many people have experiences in common with us who have not been formally diagnosed. This itself reveals that a formal diagnosis is hardly necessary, and that a psychiatric paradigm of accepting self-identification is inevitable. The researchers are increasingly already doing it.
You can read the full essay for free (or have it narrated to you!) at this link.
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munariplans · 5 months
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Hey! Could i request a fic about a spider reader who has the symbiote in his body and is acting in a more arrogant way and Natasha realizes this and tries to help her girlfriend. Thank you and I love your writing!!
a favour to fury | natasha romanoff
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synopsis: based on the request above! i added a little bit of my own twist and had fun with it, hopefully that's ok.
natasha romanoff x venomised! spidey! reader
word count: 4.5k words
warnings: brief graphic descriptions of violence
read part 2 here
masterlist
natasha was five months pregnant when fury approached you regarding a supersecret project norman osborn had been studying for the past year and a half. they had called it a symbiote, you remembered, designed to mutualistically bond with a human host at the subcellular level. 
you had asked what it was for, half-heartedly already packing your things to go home to your pregnant wife. work was done for the day, and fury was holding you back. he said he had wanted to make you stronger, almost invincible. you shot him a look that said seriously? and declined. 
“do i not hit your KPIs or something, nick? do you not trust me enough with my current abilities?” you slung your bag over your shoulder, still very offended that he would suggest such a thing, to you of all people. 
you felt you had been in the team longest, alongside tony. it was so unfair to hint that he wanted something more out of you just because you had been off of your game for the past few months dealing with more personal issues in your life, like your almost-failed marriage. “mind you, i trained that kid, that peter parker, from being nothing but a friendly, neighbourhood spider-man slinging around knocking the teeth out of pickpockets, to being able to deal with world-ending threats we face as avengers. all. by. myself.” 
“i know–”
“–and who was the one who pulled SHIELD out of financial ruin when we almost went under? my weapons, my designs. i wasn’t proud that we sold it off to warring countries, but it helped us stay afloat!”
“and you have helped us out, dearly.”
“and lest you forget, i was the one, the only one, willing to let you and dr. ames experiment on me, injecting that spider serum on me when you knew i had a fifty-fifty chance of screwing up my nervous system beyond repair. when you knew i would most likely end up paralysed if it didn’t work. and i was your best agent!” at this point, you knew you were overcompensating, but it had been a long day, and an even longer week. you had just wanted to go home. but you couldn’t back down. “the one who’s stuck by your side from day one!”
“i know!” nick suddenly barked, slamming the door, your only exit out, shut. “you think i don’t know that?! you think i don’t know just how much i owe you?”
he took one step forward, you took one step back. the look on his face was dangerous, a warning for you not to overstep boundaries. he was still your boss, after all. “but oscorp’s our biggest funding, you know this too. and they need…”
fury’s lips quivered. “...they need someone to test out just the limits of the abilities of this symbiote before we are allowed to use it for our own lines of defence. and norman had initially suggested parker, the boy, because…”
you understood. norman osborn was a disgusting man. “...because he’s currently the weakest one out of all of us. they want to test his limits through it.”
“yes.” fury wasn’t proud of what he was implying either, “but he’s too young, too inexperienced. and i was sure, as his mentor, you were never going to let it happen to him. you don’t admit it, but you love him. you and tony. he disagreed too.”
you couldn’t let it happen to peter. it was too dangerous, too risky. but fuck nick for also thinking that you had nothing to lose. you had a baby on the way, and a relationship just-repaired, for heaven’s sake. 
but if not you, who else?
you knew natasha would have never approved. what you should have done was tell fury you would think about it. that natasha was pregnant, and she needed you relatively sane, and stable, for her and the baby. 
you should have told natasha explicitly of what the experiment entailed, and why you wanted to do it. that you were merely protecting peter, and you didn’t wish for anyone else to suffer through the treatment like you were going to. 
these were things you did when the person you love will inevitably have to go through the ups and many, many downs, of what the next few weeks would entail between the both of you. you had learned from past experience.
in hindsight, you also knew that even though natasha recognised your selflessness, and your sacrifice, she still would not have approved of you destroying your life to save peter’s. but in hindsight, neither of you, nor fury, would have known of just what the venom symbiote would do to you. 
the bonding had been relatively painless, taking into account the fact that the team had to sedate you completely before allowing the symbiote to even come close to the host. fury had promised you it was the last favour he would ever draw from you before you shut your eyes, and it was only natasha’s face waiting for you at home that allowed you to drift off under the anaesthesia so willingly. 
when you came to, the aches and bruises from previous fights had suddenly disappeared, and the wear and tear your bones have suffered through the years had dissipated to the point that you felt like you were at the prime of your youth again, just right after they had first injected the spider serum.
when you came home, you kissed natasha’s forehead first, then her cheek, then her lips, and finally, down to her swollen belly, where one of these days you hoped you had the privilege of hearing your child kick. 
“how’s the pain today?” you folded your sleeves to your forearms, heading to the sink to wash your hands as natasha began plating dinner. “is he giving you heartburn again?”
natasha moaned in relief as you came to rub circles on the small of her back, untangling the knots that had accumulated in her aching body. “better. he’s learned to not give mama so much pain entering the second trimester. we all grow.”
your soft smile made the woman swoon, even after all these years. “that’s great. atta boy.”
“what about you? how was…” she had wanted to say the inhumane procedure, the cruel dilemma, they put you through, but all she said was, “...the experiment?”
“it was alright,” you reassured her. she knew you hadn’t wanted her to worry, “happy to be back home with you, that’s all.”
it was your signal to her not to push the matter further. it was you telling her that what she didn’t know, couldn’t hurt her.
– 
in the next few days, however, the heightened powers and new abilities that had latched on to you from the symbiote had also brought about a new impatience, a little bit of arrogance within you. 
panting as you watched the pixelated bodies of enemies taken down all around you, your heart pounded in exhilaration at the sight of them “dead”. you had never felt power like this before, and as much as the scowl on fury’s face was deepening day by day, the excitement, and hope, in your own face, began to grow. you really were stronger than ever.
and the sleek, indestructible new suit that the symbiote had formed around you when you were in battle was just a cherry on top. 
it had all started when steve asked for a sparring session with you one day. you were usually equally matched with him in toe to toe combats, with the occasional instances where he won by distracting you with natasha’s mention. 
but you had never taken him down as quickly, and easily, as this before. he had fallen with one swift lunge to his stomach, and began choking out his dinner from earlier as you stepped back.
“stop playing with me, captain, get up.” you said, when you got irritated that he told you he needed a breather. 
“y-you’re the one who kicked me so hard in the guts, it really hurts, you know,” he wheezed, catching his breath. 
you scoffed. since when had he become so weak?
you pulled him up against his will, and beat the shit out of him two more times before he raised the white flag desperately.
for lunch one afternoon, natasha had come by with her newfound skills in cooking, bearing lunch for the team. she was welcomed with open arms, except for maria, who was nursing a blackeye you had given her earlier. 
as the both of you settled for a break after lunch, however, natasha finally brought up the topic that had been plaguing her mind for the past few weeks. 
she had asked you about your thoughts on her returning to work, on a deskbound duty. “...and the occasional logistical support for missions, if you know what i mean.”
you paused the paperwork you had been doing in front of her, giving it a beat or two, before shaking your head. “no.”
“no…?” she hadn’t expected the firmness of the answer. while she was expecting resistance, she had thought you would be kind enough to humour her with a certainly not in the field, or just desk duty, not a flat-out no. 
“no.”
“why?” she held your hand then, stopping you from returning your pen to paper, and you raised an eyebrow. natasha thought you looked slightly too annoyed for a relatively inoffensive question. “i thought you would be supportive. we agreed, when i was three months along back then, that i could return when i was ready.”
you shook her hand off, sending natasha’s heart down to a plunge. you had been more on edge, even at home recently, to the point where she was feeling she had to almost tiptoe around you on your bad days. “i don’t think i need to explain just how dangerous it would be for you, and the baby. no.”
she called your name in disbelief. “how about just paperwork? i could help you do your paperwork. then we can see each other around more often, just like we used to. i miss you at home, and it’s so terribly boring, all day, being alone.”
“natasha, i said no. you should respect my wishes on this.”
“what is so dangerous about paperwork?!” she stood then, frustrated that you were so unyielding. you never were so unreasonable like this. perhaps, natasha thought, she had gotten too used to receiving the princess treatment from you throughout the duration of your relationship. but she wondered if that was even such a bad thing. “and why are you dictating my decisions and what i want to do?!”
why in hell was she being so annoying today? you found it hard to shake the unsavoury thoughts out of your head. 
just then, natasha’s phone began to ring, a new, annoyingly high-pitched frequency ringtone that immediately sent stings like sharp jabs into the nodes of your brain. you flinched, instantly forgetting what you had wanted to say to her, and dropped the pen you were holding unconsciously. 
“baby…” she grabbed the phone, silenced it, and turned to you, who was panting and massaging your temples from the pain. 
but you only shook your head, preventing her from coming closer. “we’ll talk about this later at home, okay? i’m not feeling so good right now.”
“do you want me to fix you anything? do you want to lie down?” she came to you, holding her hands over yours, noticing they were shaking. you visibly calmed as she ran her hands up and down your back, bringing you back to earth with her. 
natasha led you to sit by the sofa again, climbing on top of you to hold you as you calmed down. it was in her embrace that the ringing finally stopped, and you could refocus. 
it was also in her embrace that your mind suddenly cleared, and the remnants of the conversation just before came back to you. you had been so dismissive. 
your eyes watering as you faced her, you said, “i don’t know what came over me…i was so…out of it, earlier. i don’t know why i…why i thought you didn’t deserve to come back. i’m so sorry, nat.”
she furrowed her eyebrows in worry. she wondered if it was something she needed to bring up with fury, on the effects of the experiment on you. but she piped it all down, insteading threading her fingers through your hair and pressing a comforting kiss on your lips. 
“it’s okay, we’ll discuss this more at home.”
“no, i…” you needed to rectify your mistake, needed to make it up to her. you couldn't stand knowing you had hurt her feelings by underestimating her, “...i’m going to talk to fury. see what roles we have for you that’s convenient for you and our son. i’ll…”
you got up shakily then, placing natasha back down on the sofa. there were cold sweats beginning to form on your forehead. natasha pleaded for you to sit down and rest for a bit, but you were already out the door in the next second, leaving her more concerned, and confused, than ever. 
– 
in the tests that followed in the next few days, natasha watched, in worry and obvious agony, the way you were losing yourself more quickly than ever. 
fury stood next to her behind the safety of bulletproof glass, where you were on the other side, in a climate and condition controlled environment. it was essentially SHIELD’s containment room for the most dangerous of specimens. 
but she thought you looked so small, so vulnerable, in the middle of the vastness of the room, crouched with your head hung low between your legs. 
“fury, we should stop. she’s clearly at the limit.” she held her hand over his on the console, but the man standing right next to fury was adamant. 
she hated norman osborn for what he was about to say. “we’re so close. just a few more tests.” 
he swatted hers and fury’s hand away, and pressed the button the both of them had been hovering above. the enemies came charging again, and despite your pleas for a breather, the symbiote had automatically enveloped you in the suit and began defending the both of you again. 
you were exhausted. every fibre in your body hurt, and the symbiote was seeping all of your strength and willpower to do the fighting for you. you were nothing more than a bird in a cage for fury and osborn, then, you knew. and you regretted so much allowing natasha into the viewing panel for your test, in the name of her helping to fill out your paperwork for the symbiote. 
“no more, please…” you begged the team above then, wanting to just collapse, and crawl into natasha’s arms perhaps, and forget about the extremely harrowing and traumatic day you just had. 
but osborn wasn’t so kind. and he had pressed the button to test the symbiote’s limits once again. “please, mr. osborn!”
“stop,” you breathed as more enemies charged right in, “stop,” you had begged when the suit once again took all the spirit that you had left, “stop,” you tried a final time, when osborn tried something new this time; a high-frequency call that the lab had identified to be a potential weakness. 
“i said STOP!” it wasn’t you who screamed it the last time. a much deeper, gravelly voice had taken over, along with the explosion of black tendrils emanating from your suit. the enemies were flung into pixelated darkness, but the tendrils had pierced right through them, aiming for the source of the pain; the frequency pitch. 
it destroyed the sound system in the containment cell, but it was not enough. because even as fury slammed the controls to stop all the tests at once, the tendrils were still against the glass of the viewing panel, and as the symbiote spread and spread, the bulletproof glass, for the very first time since natasha had used it for the past decade or so, cracked. 
osborn watched in horror as the crack began to spread, before he was quickly knocked out by natasha pushing him aside to reach the microphone. 
“baby, it’s me. it’s natasha!”
the tendrils stopped the rampage on the glass momentarily. it had worked. fury instructed her to go further. “please, can you…can you get the symbiote off of the glass? we–i–want to see you, please.”
it was silent for a minute, then two, and with her heart in her mouth, natasha watched as the tendrils slowly retreated, shrinking the surface area they covered until your body was visible and it had gone back into the suit. 
and natasha’s heart broke at the sight of you unconscious, at the mercy of the symbiote, and crouched into a foetal position to try to protect yourself before the explosion from earlier. 
hell hath no fury like a pregnant woman, norman osborn learned that day, as he went home with more bruises and broken bones from one natasha romanoff than he had ever had to endure his whole life. 
– 
you no longer liked the strength, the agility, the injury-free protection, the symbiote gave. not after that test. not after it had caused you to wake up in the medical wing, with a sobbing natasha by your side begging you to stop the experiments, and let the symbiote go.
“what is happening to you?” she begged later on, as she had climbed into the bed herself and enveloped herself in your embrace. you shushed her cries and reassured her that you would fix everything. that you were alright, and you were going to be alright for her.
“i don’t know, i’m sorry.” lately, all you could say was you were sorry. it was terribly unfair to natasha.
and to make things even worse, the moment that those meaningless, obsolete words left your mouth, a hint of movement came from natasha’s belly, triggering your spider senses immediately. the baby had just kicked. 
when you forced natasha to go home to rest with laura later on, for the first time in your life, you cried yourself to sleep at the failure of a partner you had once again become for your wife.
natasha was understandably reluctant at your request to be separated. but she was also pragmatic, and understanding that you had to do it not only for her own safety, but your peace of mind. she was too good to you, you always knew.
“it’s just for a week,” you reminded her, lips still chasing hers as the both of you fought on who would say goodbye first. 
she latched on to your tongue. “i know.”
“just a week.”
“i know.” 
but the both of you groaned then. “but why does it seem like forever?”
– 
“fuck osborn.”
“heard.”
“we’re removing that symbiote from you,” fury looked a little unkempt, which, if you knew fury, meant he was at the edge of losing it. it was clear how much the symbiote had been affecting him as well, “i can’t lose you.”
leaning against his desk, you nodded. “please, fury.”
several attempts were made, with many different methods the team of SHIELD’s best scientists had tried, to remove the symbiote from your host. but obviously, without the principal team who had done the research on the symbiote itself, it was difficult to do so without oscorp’s help. 
all attempts had been unsuccessful. and the symbiote inside you was growing angrier and angrier. 
it broke your heart to see, that after each lashing out, each beratement and burst of anger you had at the team, they oddly seemed…afraid of you. and yet you couldn’t tell them that you yourself were drowning, that you had no control over your own emotions and actions in those bursts of anger, that it wasn’t you. fury had sworn you to secrecy. 
perhaps it was for the best that you had sent natasha away. you were deathly afraid of what you would do to her if the symbiote lashed out in her presence. 
you called her every morning, and she called you every night. it was a routine the both of you agreed to set up, mostly to keep yourself sane and for natasha to not worry about you too much. it broke your heart to know that one morning, she hadn’t answered your call because she was at the obstetrician, all alone. natasha hated going for her medical appointments all alone. 
afterwards, you apologised profusely for missing out on your baby’s development, and had sent her a bouquet of flowers. but you still felt it was barely adequate for making it up to her. you hated yourself for hurting natasha because of your own damn actions, once again. 
she was only kind enough to tell you that she was alright, and that you needed to focus on getting the symbiote out before returning to her. 
but as the days passed with little to no success of the extraction, you were growing more frustrated, and the symbiote was growing more powerful. 
natasha was approaching six months, and you hadn’t answered any of her calls for a few days now. you were afraid of what little progress you would have to tell her, and worried over what her reaction would be. 
you’re a failure. you are always going to be a failure. she will hate you, and she will regret even getting to know someone like you, marrying you, being the mother of your child. you cannot be the one she deserves. you don’t deserve anyone. except us. us.
the voices weren’t your own. you should have known. 
“fury, please, please,” you begged, barging into the meeting room he was in, barking orders at the scientists to try harder, to think of solutions faster. they were clearly at their wits’ end too. 
“please, call oscorp,” you got on your knees for him, in front of everyone, grabbing his hands in desperation, “call osborn here. i’ll do anything, i’ll beg him too, to get this thing off of me.”
“you know norman’s not going to stop once he has you. he’ll turn you into something even worse if we let him have you.”
“please!” you were crying then, feeling like a child begging their parents for an unachievable, stupid, stupid dream. only this time, you were begging for your life back. 
“i’m scared, nick. of what this will do to me, of what i will become.”
nick had brought you aside later that evening. it was in his eyes that heartbreak was evident; he knew all too well what he had done to you. and he had fucked up, truly, this time. 
“i’m so sorry.”
“please, try again, can you try again?” you were in the room where they had conducted the tests; the containment cell. you knew fury was slightly afraid of being in the same room with you all alone, and there was a reason he had brought you there. you could get into the cell if you lost control. 
he shook his head. “i just–we just–don’t have anything…”
“i cannot become the symbiote, nick. i have natasha, and the child, at home. i can’t go like this, please.”
you were hunched over the console, grabbing at it desperately to stop the symbiote from coming out, from enveloping you in your shared rage at fury’s insistence, and killing the man right before you. beads of cold perspiration drenched your entire being, and the look in your eyes was one the man had never seen in all the years he had worked with you. 
he could only shake his head, and leave the room. outside the compound, fury screamed into the vast nothingness of the night, exasperated in his futility and your predicament. 
– 
but natasha had had enough of your pulling back, of you pushing her away. she was not about to lose you again. she had almost lost you to wanda then, she was not going to lose you to a symbiote now. 
and as she arrived at the compound and discovered that it was eerily dark, and empty, the first person that she hounded was fury. 
he apologised to her as well, over the phone, and told her that he had instructed everyone to go home early for the day. the avengers were told to find accommodation elsewhere. something about a routine deep-cleaning going on for the night. 
it was suspicious the moment he told her you were still inside, however. still, she braved the recurring doubts in the back of her mind, stole her old equipment back when she was still on active mission duty, and braved through the compound. 
“just me and you baby, don’t give mama such a hard time, okay?” she even winced, when the baby kicked right as she rounded a corner. 
and you admired your wife, adored her, even, for still braving through six months of pregnancy and trying to find you in an almost-abandoned compound. the compound was never empty. the lights were never flickering, and you were never alone just with her in that entire building. 
but when she carefully opened the door to where you were, still hunched over the same console she had smashed norman osborn’s face against just a few weeks ago, you wholeheartedly wished she was the last person to find you in that way. 
the shock in her breath was evident, with the number of dead bodies around you then, and the distinct stench of blood in the air. you were shaking, breathing haphazard, as you tried centering yourself not to hurt anyone else. three breaths in, two breaths out, you always taught natasha in her panic attacks. now, you struggled to even manage it yourself. 
“baby…?” the woman didn’t want to believe what she was seeing. 
you shook your head painfully. why, of all people, why did it have to be her? the gun was aimed right at you, you knew, and you struggled to bring yourself up to even face her. your efforts ended with you falling right onto the console again. 
“...tell me what’s going on. tell me what’s wrong, we can still get through this together.” you absolutely despised the fear in her voice. 
instead, all you could choke out was, “natasha…”
you finally turned to face her. natasha dropped the gun at the symbiote already engulfing half of your face, milky white eyes replacing the eye patches in your mask, sharp, elongated teeth forming around your mouth area. the symbiote had clearly gained full control. 
in the one eye that was still yours, you were tearful, as you begged her, “...please, get out of here.”
a/n: does this call for a part 2?
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theblueflower05 · 1 year
Text
The Sweetest Sylaung
A/N: So I def didn’t mean to write a novel long Neteyam smut story but here we are. Debating on making this a mini series. Also the anon that requested a “curvy” reader insert- here ya go!(she’s also an Augustine- buttttt you can only see that if you squint lol)
Word Count: 6k+
Warnings: This is smut. Pure smut. Please don’t read if it is not your jam. You are in charge of cultivating your own online experience, you’ve been warned!
Pairing: Aged Up! Neteyam x Human!Curvy!Reader
Summary: After an “accidental” romp in the forest, you do your best to avoid Neteyam. It’s for everyone’s good, or so you’ve convinced yourself.
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“I’m begging for you to take my hand, wreck my plans. That’s my man”- Willow, Taylor Swift
The kaleidoscope of colors explode under your eyes in endless patterns and shapes as you look over the sample of Pandora flora under the heavy duty microscope. This particular piece of the Moons terra had never been discovered before, only blooming at what you estimated to be every ten or so years, under the right monsoon like conditions
At least that’s what you had discovered so far.
The flower, which sprouted into a berry, and then dissipated into a moss like cluster of microorganisms all within its short life cycle had turned into your passion project. You we’re doing your thesis on it, the last step in getting your Masters.
You’d gone through schooling on a computer screen, guided by the greatest minds on Earth that had relocated to Pandora. Scientists of all fields who you’d grown up around. None of them had been surprised when you’d picked up botany. Xenobotany to be exact.
It was in your blood.
The desk your at shakes violently- disturbing your precision like focus. Breaking you straight out of your zone.
“Ugh” you groan, frustrated, raising your head, eyes narrowing at the culprits.
Spider, Lo’ak and Kiri freeze like deers in the headlights of your fury. Spiders arm raised, a wad of paper balled up in his hand, aimed to shoot. He lowers it slowly as the weight of your your heavy gaze zero’s in.
“Sorry, cu-”
“I told you guys, if you cant behave to get the fuck out” You seethe. Your nerves are paper thin anyway. Too much screen time frying your brain something fierce as you focused in on your studies. “Is that not what I said, verbatim?”
“You need to chill. You’ve been so high strung lately. Come hang out with us” Lo’ak suggests smooth and unhelpful. As usual. “When was the last time you left the lab?”
You roll your eyes and bite your tongue, trying not to say anything to scalding to the surprisingly sensitive Sully brother. “No thanks. I’ve gotta focus”
“Maybe Lo’aks right” Kiri starts, her face screwing up as she speaks “Eywa that sounds wrong. Nevermind, My brother is never right- but you should come hang out with us. Let’s go swimming- the watering hole is over flowing from the storms”
The deep sigh through your nose isn't calming, even though you pretend it is. You know they mean well, in the most annoying way. That you’d been buried in books and paperwork in the lab for the past couple months.
Hiding from the outside world within the thick walls of Hell’s Gate.
“Can’t. This is important, Kir- but why don’t you guys head down there? Its closer to Home Tree and its almost curfew anyway” two birds, one stone. Its a smart suggestion- but Kiri’s face falls, shoulders sagging and ears lowing. That look had always gotten you-
“I cant today, but maybe tomorrow? The samples are too fresh and I don't want to put them on ice…But I think Max made those Yovo cookie things” That’s only half of the truth, but luckily Kiri’s always been understanding.
She grabs your elbow in her long fingers and tugs you along.
The mess hall had seen better days, but the large open space still tends to be the meeting ground for the humans that were allowed to stay and inhabit the moon. With twelve foot tall ceilings and airtight exits and windows that lead out to the Avatar Program training yards. Its a common room of sorts, a place where everyone gathers. For meals, for mismatched Holidays. But mostly for gossip.
I mean, what else is there to do?
Like currently, you’re deeply engrossed in the story that Doctor Martinez’s, Xeno-Zoologist is recounting. All dramatics and dirty intimate details “It’s true, they’re gonna bring it before Mo’at and everything”
He’s talking about Trevino and Eital’i.
Everyone had heard the whispers, seen the not so subtle signs. The main Radio Tower operator had turned during the resistance, had fought beside Jake and had been allowed to stay on Pandora- better stuck on a foreign planet then thrown in a familiar jail cell. Trevino’s a cool guy, really.
A cool guy who had been sleeping with a Na’vi woman, apparently. The two had kept it under wraps, really private. No one could pin down how or when it happened,,,but to go to the clan’s Tsahik seeking a mating blessing? That’s major.
“You’re lying” you accuse in a gasp as the table breaks into whispers, all wide eyes and shaking heads. “They’re going to mate?...How?”
“It’s not like it hasn't happened before” Another scientist chimes in casually. Like it’s a known thing.
Which it kind of is.
Taboo, yes. But not unheard of, more like untalked about.
Humans and the Na’vi of the forest had lived in close quarters since the overthrow of the RDA. Jake, the standing Olo’eyktan, just had a little too much homosapien in him. Yeah, he’d survived the soul transfer and fully inhabited his blue body- but he never quite grew out of his human roots.
It had been hard, lots of politicking and good grace shown on both parts, but somehow, like all biomes in the vast perma green forest, all had learned to live in harmony. Most Omitikaya kept their distance. Very hesitant about the human presence. They had every right to be scared, hostile. Scarred by man and its weapons and its destruction.
Others had been raised in close proximity to Grace’s school. Had become accustomed to the nearly two decade long human presence on Pandora. Curious and accepting.
You’d heard about interspecies hookups.
Locker room talks that left your ears burning and your heart racing. It usually came from members of the Avatar Program- It tends to set a precedent, when the quote on quote “royal family” of the Omiticaya is a Jarhead and a native woman.
Na’vi are gorgeous, tall and lean but humanoid enough to be familiar…you’re not exactly sure what they see in humans but you know damn well what you guys see in them.
“How do you think that works? The…physicality of it all I mean. Trevino doesn't have an Avatar. How do they fuck-”
You’re not the only one zoning out from the conversation and it’s lewd turn.
You watch Kiri watch Spider and your heart aches for her. What they have is secret, delicate and forbidden. As a woman with high standing in the clan, you knew that her feelings for the boy wouldn't go anywhere. Couldn't.
When they we’re kids, it was cute. Now that they 're both technically adults, it was just plain stupid.
You tell her of the fact, often.
Kiri tells you to stop projecting.
———
The Sully Kid’s are always late. It’s like no matter how hard they try, they cant make curfew. You throw on an Exopack, hurrying them to the fence.
“Yeah, yeah okay mom. Take it easy” Lo’ak shrugs huffily as you yank hard on his arm. “I’m going, Y/N!”
“Not fast enough you strumbeast’s ass! You’re gonna get me into trouble, who do you think your dad’s gonna blame when you guys end up back at Home Tree super late again? Norm chewed me out for that shit last time!” You man handle the much taller than you alien.
Kiri and Spider a few leagues in front of you, already at the mouth of the giant fence. They’re awkward, not in their usual synched steps. You wonder how much of that conversation earlier had gone to their heads?
You’re bickering with Lo’ak, an extremely normal occurrence. He can be a real douche. and had been kind of insufferable lately. You think its nerves about his impending Iknamaya.
So engrossed with getting them on their way home that you don't even notice him until it’s too late.
Neteyam is a skilled hunter, through and through. The youngest in the clan to ever make a kill. Swift and quiet. Beloved.
But around you he feels out of his element. Clunky and awkward, no matter how hard he tries to play it off its like you can see right through him. Its scary and thrilling, sets his stomach alive with butterflies everytime. This is no different.
Showing up to Hell’s Gate to retrieve his siblings was something he had done since he was a child.
He’d used to bleed hours away playing with them at the scientists fortress, but as he had gotten older and his responsibilities had grown heavier- he had little time for it. Still, when ever his parents would send him out on a one man search party to bring them home, he’d jump at the chance.
At the hope of seeing you.
You’re arguing with his little brother, trying not to laugh at something he said and Neteyam knows. He knows he shouldn't feel jealous but he just cant help it. Cant help the acidic twist of his insides.
Especially when he chirps out his family's familiar call, letting his presence be known.
And watches that pretty smile fall right off of your face.
“You’re late, as usual” His voice has a stern edge. It’s annoying, the role he has to play. Kiri is a woman grown, Lo’ak just weeks away from being the same. He doesnt blame them for the way their feathers bristle, almost viscerally.
“Ah, big brother you didn't have to come all this way to get us” Kiri reassures, patting Neteyam on the chest good naturedly. “We we’re just about to be on our way”
Neteyam notices the way you try to look anywhere else but him. It stings because he cant stop looking at you, cant pry his eyes away from your form.
“You all should start heading back before dad notices” Neteyam starts. His father had been busy as of late, harvest season abundant and fruitful this year because of the heavy rain season “I’ll catch up, I need to speak with Norm”
“What? Dad cant use the coms now, he has to send his messenger” Lo’ak’s nose scrunches a little, always questioning. On a normal day it wouldn't affect Neteyam so much, just a normal jab from his snot nosed little brother.
Not today. Not when he’s stretched so thin. Not when you refuse to look at him but are staring at the side of Lo’ak fat head. It feels wrong, makes his skin heat up to the point that it feels itchy and tight.
“That's none of your concern. Head back to Home Tree. Now” He doesn't normally throw his weight around. But he feels the need to puff up big in front of you “Those are orders. Get out of here”
Lo’ak’s less offended and more surprised. One of his oh so human eyebrows cocks, a sly remark in his throat before he scoffs. “Aye, Aye Captain Kiss Ass. C’mon Kiri let's go. See you later Spider, Y/N”
He deuces up Spider, gives Y/N a pat on her small shoulder and glares harshly at his brother before he disappears into the thick brush of the jungle.
Kiri wraps her arms around you in a strong hug, muttering about ‘swimming’ and ‘promises’. The small impish smile she shoots Spider gives YOU butterflies so you don't blame the way he swoons, before she’s off behind her younger brother.
“I can go find Norm for you, bro. I think he’s still out in his Avv, but Max can radio him back in” Spider is none the wiser. Doesn't notice the heavy tension that simmers on a low bubble. Oblivious, as usual.
“Yeah, sure” Neteyam replies, barely sparing the human boy a glance. He’d feel bad for it later, when he could form coherent thought. When his brain wasn't on Y/N issued override.
Spider chatters, good natured. He never got to see the Olo’eyktan in training anymore. He missed his homie.
“Well, I should be heading back. You guys have a good rest of your night-” You’re already turning on your heels when you make the announcement, eager to get back inside. Back behind the safe walls of the lab- far away from Neteyam.
“No”
Neteyam who stares at you with all too knowing eyes. He looks straight through you like he can see through your clothes, through your thinly veiled escapism attempts. He reaches out, wraps his long fingers around the top of your arm and tugs you back to him. Gentle, but very firm.
He doesn't have to say it- it’s written all over his face. Not this time. He’s not going to let you run away from him.
“Netey-” You start in a whine, tugging on his hold. He doesnt relent, if anything his fingers tighten as his eyes narrow. Dangerous, desperate.
“Just talk to me” it’s a barely concealed plea, his tail twitches anxiously behind him “I'm just asking for five minutes. Please Y/N”
Spiders oblivious, yes. Stupid? No. He doesnt know exactly what's going on between the two of you but has clued into the fact that it’s heavy and he wants no part of it.
The excuse he makes is shit- he’ll just go find Norm. Yeah… he’s so out of there.
“What is wrong with you?” You hiss as you watch Spiders awkward, quick retreating form. Eyes flickering over the empty for now training yards “So much for keeping it lowkey, huh? Could you be anymore obvious?”
“What’s wrong with me?” Neteyam is almost shaking with disbelief “What the fuck is wrong with you? You havent talked to me in over a month. Everytime I make any kind of attempt you bolt. I dont-” He sighs, pinching the wide bridge of his nose with the hand that isnt holding onto you.
He looks tortured. Tired. Run a little ragged.
Beautiful.
“I don't know what I did? If this is about that day in the forest-”
You sigh at his words, once again pulling on his hold. Shaking your head desperately because you can't.
You can't talk about it. Fuck, you’ve been trying not to even think about it.
And failing as you replay the event over and over again the darkness of your bunk. Hyper fixating on the way that his lips had felt against yours. Oh the way that his big hands had worked your body over
“Don’t” you whisper “Please don’t”
You’d never been one to beg for pity, for mercy but that’s what you do now. Beg him to let you out of his tight clutches. Metaphorically and physically.
“You’re all I can think about” It's a gutted admittance, but Neteyam makes it all the same “That night- I can’t sleep. I can barely eat- I’m falling behind on my duties because I keep coming back here. Standing outside this fence and waiting for you. I know you could hear me over the coms, right?”
And you could, a few weeks or so ago.
When he’d begged you to come out. To come speak to him. His voice so appealing that you’d almost caved. You’d had to turn off your receiver. Had sat with your head in your hands for hours as you fought the urge to crawl to him, knees raw and your bloody heart on a platter only he could divulge in.
He shuffles closer, all lean strong muscle. Firm, unmovable. “You heard me”
“Of course I did”
“And you still left me out here” He scoffs, head shaking slightly as his adams apple bobs, his ears are pinned to the sides of his head in obvious distress “I could never do that shit to you.”
“One of us needs to be the adult in this situation” Your voice is as strong as you can make it. Trying to speak reason on to both of you “We can pretend it never happened and go back to the way that things were before. You’re my friend, Tey”
You reach up, stroking at his wrist. Trying to soften him enough for him to let this go. Let you go.
He’s trying to control his breathing, all that training for all of those years for what? One fragile human girl to make him completely unspool? To lose any and all composure he’d worked so hard to gain.
He was always the adult, in all situations. Had been born with a neck cramping crown on his head. Shrouded in pressurized glory.
“If this is me being childish, so be it. Where has pretending gotten you, huh? Look at you, yawntutsyìp. you look so tired. When was the last time you slept? Kiri says you spend days in the lab without resting”
His hands, both of them, come up to cup your face. Huge and calloused. Yet he holds you like you're something precious. A small animal, a rare gem. His whole entire world since he was just a boy.
Neteyam thumbs at the cool glass of your mask, tenderly. The bags under your eyes are sunken and bruised. “Don’t shut me out”
Your body, in its entirety, clenches at his words. Velvet and sincere. He’s a fucking dream. Your head leans into his hands, neck sagging of its own accord as any and all words of protest leave your weak mind.
He makes you so easy.
“Let me in…I dont want there to be this distance between us anymore” He hisses around the word distance. Hating even having to say it “I want to be inside of you again”
Your plump lower lip gets skewered between your teeth, eyes screwed shut as you remember the last time. Your first ever time being full…you’d dreamt of it every night since it had happened.
If it wasn't for the blasted mask and your need for Earth’s oxygen he’d kiss you. Right here right now. He didn't really give a shit who saw or what they had to say.
Instead pulls you into his chest, lets you wind your arms around his lean middle and bury your chest in his diaphragm. Its as close as he can get you, for now. Makes you cling to him the way that he’d clung to every thought of you for the last weeks.
You wish it was lungfuls of his skin that you were taking as you try to bring yourself down from this abrupt shaky high. You dont get it, how your relationship couldve flipped this hard in such a short time.
He had always just been Neteyam. A shameless flirt yes- but that’s all it was.
“Would you like that?” He questions, hands working through your hair. Fingers light and soothing on your scalp. Massaging the thoughts right out of your head.
“Hmm?”
“If I was inside you again?” He presses on. You can feel the tickle of his long, thin, tail as it wraps around the back of your calf and you groan, digging your nails into his back.
“You’re such an asshole. Stoppppp it” You’re embarrassed and turned on and already feel stupid enough, he doesn't need to rub it in. His chest shakes as he chuckles.
“I’m serious. Tell me you want it-”
“Neteyam! Hey!”
The two of you break apart in an instant. You jump away from him as though struck by lightning. Instantly putting enough distance between you and the Na’vi that maybe, just maybe an onlooker might think that the embrace was friendly.
It’s Norm, having heard that the eldest Sully was looking for him he’d come eagerly.
The smile you plaster on is forced and honestly, Neteyam doesnt fair any better. He’s obviously flustered, just glad that his erection isn't tenting his tweng.
“Spider told me you and your dad are looking for me. I’m not intruding on uh anything, am I?” Norm looks between the two of you.
Your arms are folded tightly over your chest and Neteyam is rubbing at the back of his neck, strong jaw flexing as his teeth grind.
Oh yeah, Norm had definitely interrupted something.
Knows for sure as you scurry away. As Neteyam, always so level headed, has to string together words. Stumbling a little bit as he tries to remember the message that Jake had relayed.
It’s not any of his business, he thinks at the time. He sure didnt want to be the one to shine the light on whatever the hell was going on here. Turning a blind eye to the mysteries of Pandora is the only way to survive the harshest terrain known to man.
———
You dont know that though-
No, you’re spiraling more a little bit as you prepare yourself for bed. Brushing through your thick hair and staring out into space as your mind assaults you with all of the gnarly ‘What If’s’
Norm had seen and he had to know right? Oh god, what if he told Jake?
You balk. Lowering the brush as your eyes bulge out of your head.
What if he told Neytiri?
That's actually a super horrific thought. Like nightmarish. You have a lot of respect for the future Tsahik...
…And a very healthy does of fear. She didnt like humans and made it known. She tolerated them only for her husband's benefit. What if she found out that her eldest son, her golden boy, had fucked one?
You’re freak out is interrupted by static, by the beeping of your com receiver on your night stand.
“Y/N?” its Neteyams muffled voice through the device. You’d ignored it once. You should ignore it again…
“Yeah?” you wonder if he picks up on how shaky you sound through the receiver.
“Tomorrow night meet me at the East Gate. Like when we we’re kids” he’s not really asking. Not demanding either. You could ignore him again, but he has to try.
The line goes silent, quiet for minutes on end.
“Y/N?”
You’re so stupid. “What time?”
You can hear the grin he’s sporting as he replies “0100”
“Got it, over. Good night, Neteyam. Go to sleep”
———
The East Bay is on the other side of the large fortress-like building. It's not that it's forbidden, or anything. but it is deserted. It’s where the military personnel had inhabited, and since most if not all of them had gotten the hard boot off Pandora it was empty as a ghost town in these maze like halls.
When you we’re younger; you’d caught Spider sneaking Kiri and Lo’ak in through the rarely used entrance. You’d demanded the know how, if he didnt want you to rat on him for it. It was a rare occurrence, but the Sully children had all been snuck into Hell’s Gate this way over the years.
You type in the codes, disabling the alarm system in order to usher Neteyam into the pressurized, air lock. You’d toted one of the Avatar Exopacks along for him, they’re heavier then hell but he’d need it.
“Hi” you smile, suddenly shy as the tall Na’vi man stands before you.
That's what he was now. A man, not only in the eyes of his people but as a whole. Broad and muscular, strong. Verile. The next leader of his people. You know that he’s highly desired in his clan. Women fawn over him. Vie for his attention.
It doesnt feel real that he wants to give it to you.
You’re nothing special. Not tall and stunning like the Omaticaya women. Even by Earth’s standards you're short, curvy. Not particularly pretty. Insecurity gnaws at you, as it so often does.
“C’mere” Neteyam urges, boldly yanking you by your waist. Pulling you flush against his body. Grabby and insistent, he wants to feel your bare skin. All plush and soft, hes been dying to taste it since the last time.
Kicking himself over and over for not savoring every bit of your body that you gave to him. He won't make the same mistake again.
He’s not gonna lie, the concrete and metal of the walls inside of Hell’s Gate have always made him a little claustrophobic. But he can't do this outside-
His lips capture yours, demanding and needy from the jump. Big, over powering, he swallows your little chirp of surprise. Devours any and all breath from your lungs. Its messy and so good. You hadn't gotten to kiss him last time.
His mouth tastes amazing, his tongue rough in texture just like you remembered. It grates your lips as you suck on it-
“Hey, slow down a little bit” You giggle as Neteyam paws at your ass, lifting you off the ground until you squirm hard, making him release you “Not here, we can't do this here there’s cameras everywhere”
“I don't care” Neteyam pecks all over your face, trying to recapture your mouth as you avoid him “Let them watch, most of those pervs would like it”
And they would know that you’re his. The thought is beyond heady.
You gasp as his sharp canines ghost over the delicate skin of your neck, nibbling on your pulse point “Please- Neteyam”
You firmly push him away, hand on his chest and maybe if you hadn't cut him off cold turkey he would've given you space. Could've pulled away for a moment to let you say your piece. Instead the idea of letting you pull away even an inch is unbearable to him.
No. instead he tosses you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. He hauls loads heavier then you every day, your protests mean little to him. With his free hand he scoops up the Avv Exo Tank,
“Where to, yawntutsyìp?”
Where too is an old conference room. Its as good as any, and Neteyam yanks a couple cushions off the old couch to act as a brace for your head as he lowers you to the floor, flat on your back.
You’re so pretty like this, he tells you of the fact.
With your hair a mess behind you, your face free of that damned mask. Grinning up at him as you rub your thighs together. He wishes he had that camera that his dad liked to take pictures on. He wants this moment of you framed, immortalized.
“I hate sky people clothes” He mutters as he tugs on the hem of your t-shirt. It hides you, hides all that skin he craves.
“You want me to take it off?” You offer eagerly, raising up enough to start peeling the piece of clothing off. You’re bare underneath, completely. Your breasts jiggle as they’re freed, nipples peaked in the cool air-conditioned air.
“Don’t ever put it on again” He demands, taking it from your hands and tossing it across the room. He’s dead serious, but by the way you're giggling you obviously think its a joke.
He can’t help it, he dives in face first. Rubbing against your soft breasts, obsessed with the way they feel. Heavy, pillowy. He drags his tongue across all of your bare skin. From your clavicle to your nipple. You always smell so pretty, but its got nothing on the way you taste. It explodes bright and savory on his tastebuds.
You let him explore, until your spit soaked and shaking. Your panties sticky as your hips search for any kind of friction. “I need you”
“You have me, my love. All of me” your eyes water at his words. At the sincerity. At how much you want them to be true.
You grab one of his hands and drag it down your chest. Past your soft, rounded belly and into your shorts. He grunts as you guide him to where you’re wet and pulsing. Rythmetically clenching around nothing.
He circles your clit, feather light. More of a tease then anything and you want to sob. You’d thought of nothing but this, touched yourself imagining him. “Tey-”
He smiles around a mouthful of nipple,tugging on with his teeth. “I missed you so much”
“Then be nice to me” you plead, trying to shove yourself down on his fingers.
“We’re being nice now? Were you nice to me when you ignored me?” he can't help it, hurt bleeds into his voice. It had been so fucking painful, knowing that you hadnt wanted to see him. To be with him.
“I’m sorry” you whine, grabbing his face, pulling it from your bosom. “I’m so sorry. I was so scared- I’m still scared but I need you”
He lets you cup his cheeks, lets you plant kisses all over him. The bridge of his nose, his eyelids, his cheekbones. You dote on him, gentle and caring and he gorges himself on your love.
“You cant ever do that again, okay?” He shivers as you kiss his ear, running your tongue along the hyper sensitive flesh “If you’re scared you come to me, not run from me. Do you understand?”
You nod, eager. “I promise, Neteyam”
It’s all he needs to hear, that you’re his. That you won't deprive him of your presence ever again. He doesn't know what he’ll do. He’s a little scared of the man he becomes when it comes to you, you’re not the only one frightened by the gravity of your feelings.
“You asked if I wanted you inside me again? Yes. So much. I never knew I could be that full” it’s like you know just what to say. You light him up from the inside. His fingers begin circling your sopping clit again, this time with intent.
It’s blurry, the fact that your lightheaded making it hard to think. To track what he’s doing to you because somehow Neteyam seems to be everywhere at once. His big body all encompassing as he takes you.
“No-no marks, baby” You try to remind him and his blazing eyes zero in on you in a glare “you know we cant…not where they can see”
You’re right, and he hates it. He’ll just have to mark you where only you can see. Where you can look at your self and be reminded that you belong to someone. That you belong to him.
He doesn't have the patience, cant stop his hands from shaking- the tear of your shorts and panties echos around the room as he removes any barriers between him and the heat at the apex of your thighs.
You cant help the thrill it sends down your spine. He’d…ripped your panties off. You thought shit like this only existed in bad Earth made Porn that you’d found on one of the labs computers.
“Sorry, sorry” his apology is far from sincere though and you can't help but giggle, patting his braids fondly.
The fingerfucking is rough, your wines and moans spilling from you as he hits spots inside of you that make you want to curl up. It’s too good. Too much-
You screech, back bowing as he bends to kiss you, loud and sloppy, right on your wet clit. His big head burrows between your thigs as he delves on your cunt, his long rough textured tongue lapping at the fat puffy lips. The texture difference has both of you groaning.
It’s heartbreakingly good, the kind of good that you’ll never be able to forget. That you’ll crave and need for the rest of your life. Addictive, as he dedicates himself to making you feel pleasure.
Neteyam eats pussy the same way he does everything else in his life, exceeding any expectations. His instincts sharp as he hones in on how to make you lose your mind.
He keeps telling you how good you taste, breaking away for heaving breaths before he reburries himself. The only sounds in the room are the beyond wet sloshing of his tongue lashing and the pathetic noises your making.
He’s eating you alive, you don’t know how you’re supposed to survive this.
His fingers, two and then three fuck in and out of you. Corkscrewing as he loosens your tightness up for him.
“O-ooh” you whine high and reedy as you feel your tummy tightening, the pressure building in a way that makes you feel like you cant breathe. You cant your hips, shoving them down at that perfect angle “Oh, sh-shhhhit. I’m gonna, I’m-”
He doubles down and you’re a goner.
The orgasm is devastating. Sofuckinggood you think you might see stars for a minute there. You can't even scream, you keep letting out these little cries that are more like wheezes. A desprate attempt to get some kind of air back in your lungs-
Which reminds you.
Even though you’re in a daze you wiggle away from him, he hisses at you about it but you swat the top of his head as you reach for the Exo Pack.
You shove the mask in his face, between your legs.
”Breathe, Neteyam” you demand him to gulp down the Pandoran air. Yeah, he could go longer in your environment than you in his but still. Death by giving head isn’t the way you’d like him to go out.
He takes long breaths and you try not to be embarrassed by how soaked his chin is.
When he pulls away his eyes are a little more focused “Thank you, sweet girl. Always thinking about me, huh?”
You nod, dropping the mask. Closer this time for easier access. His eyes quickly zero back in on your swollen pussy, on how wet he got you. On how pretty it looks. His mouth is watering all over again-
When you try to close your thighs, the burning of your cheeks getting to be too much he hisses again. It’s not a sound he often makes and it’s a revelation, he’s so sexy. Almost feral.
“Who said I’m done?”
You’re never going to be able to get over this man “I already came?...”
“Yes? So?” he rolls his eyes, lowering his head, nuzzling at the damp juncture of your inner thigh “You’re still so tight, here feel”
His fingers slip back in you and you mewl, baring down as he scissors the long digits.
“We have to get you loose enough to take me, I don’t want to hurt you” He explains it like you need convincing. Like he has to convince you to let him eat you out. You just re-spread your thighs, relaxing back onto the cool floor as you let him do as he pleases.
It takes two more orgasms that you scream and shake through until he deems that you’re ready. By the time that he begins to slide his cock into you you’re a blubbering, oversensitive mess. You’re crying rivers of tears as you cling to him.
“Hold my hand? Please ” You request and he smiles, kissing your tear streaked cheek as he interlaces his longer fingers with yours.
Humans and Na’vi can fuck, but we’rnt designed to. His dick is overwhelimgly big and will really injure you if the two of you aren't careful about this.
You both gasp sharply as his tip breaches you.
It hurts, it’s agonizing. It’s the kind of pleasure pain that you didnt even know could exist. Everytime you think you can adjust, he pushes in another inch. But oh, how you missed it. Being so full it feels like you’re going to burst. You’re pussy flutters as it fights to take him and you focus in on his face.
It’s all scrunched up in heavy concentration. His lips speared between his sharp teeth in a way that has them almost bleeding.
You can't have that. You tug him into a kiss, soothing the abused flesh with your tongue.
“I-I dont want to hurt you” He whimpers as his forehead rests against yours.
“It’s okay, you’re okay” You hum to him, grasping at his hand even tighter “I love what you do to me. I love how you feel”
When he bottoms out you think he must be in your ribs. Hes still, letting your body get used to him. Trying to be kind. You want to tell him that there’s no getting used to his size. That he could fuck you every day for the rest of your lives and he would still feel just as massive.
“Please” you wail instead “please”
The first gentle snap of his pelvis has you both reeling. Your thighs lock around his thin hips, urging him. You can take it. It only takes a little urging for him to lose himself. The harsh stretch of it has you shaking as your over sensitive pussy tightens. You’re coming again, less intense the the previous orgasms, thankfully.
Neteyam had been so focused on making you feel good that he’d neglected his hard, weeping cock. His balls are so full that he knows he’s not going to be able to draw this out.
You know you have to look stupid, mouth hanging open as you raggedly gasp for breath, letting out punched out sounds as Neteyam pounds into you. You cant look away from his face though.
It’s mesmerizing, all of it. The sounds he lets out. The way that his braids sway with the rhythm of his pleasure seeking body. His broad shoulders, bulging biceps and forearms- you are so fucked.
You’re so in love.
“Please Y/N” He wheezes as you squeeze around him, letting go of your hand so he can wrap both of his arms around your lower back “I can’t hold it. W-where should I?”
Oh. Oh, he’s the sweetest man. He always has been.
You peck his lips, not minding that he’s too lost in his own pleasure to really kiss you back
“Come inside me. Come inside me. Come inside me” it’s a heated chant, broken and breathy by the erratic rhythm of his hips and he buries his head in your neck, wailing in the skin there.
Just for a moment, lost in the haze of sex, you can tell he forgets his own strength. Thrusts into you so hard that you scream out in pain, the mushroom tip of his long cock batters your cervix relentlessly. Its a sharp, startling sensation that you’ve never known but you ride it out for him. Desperately trying to keep your whimpers of discomfort at bay.
When he comes, his whole body goes still and ram rod straight. He hugs you tightly to him. You wish you could see his face. Next time, hopefully.
He’s Neteyam, the mighty warrior. The dutiful son. The next clan leader but as he shakes and twitches and basks in the afterglow you can't help but want to baby him. But stroke his back softly, rubbing the residual tension out of his tired muscles.
He’s your big ol’ pussy cat, you’d always teased. He purrs like one every time you’re affectionate with him.
You can’t help but run your hands along his sensitive spine. Let the length of his tail run through the loop of your fingers. He grins and flicks it from side to side. He’d always thought your fascination with it was amusing.
“Are you okay?” he mutters, still hidden in your hair as he starts to come back to himself and you hum, moving up to pat his braids.
“Mmhmm” you’re maybe not as capable of making words as you though you were. He chuckles and hugs you. Holds you in his big arms in a way that makes you feel untouchable.
The two of you lie in that room for as long as you can, until he has to start heading back to Home Tree, it’s almost morning and his parents are early risers. They’ll look for him if hes not in his tent…
It's hard. Letting him go. Even though you know he’ll be back. You keep pulling him back in for kisses, holding onto his muscular arms until he laughs and peels you off of him.
“I’ll be back my love. I’ll always return for you”
You frown but agree, pushing him away to get re-dressed- “How am I supposed to go back like this! Neteyam I don't have any pants!”
He’d shredded your shorts and panties. Literal tatters of cloth are all that’s left.
Neteyam cracks up, almost keeling over. Thinking he’s oh so funny. It lightens the situation and makes letting him go- watching him disappear back in the forest a little easier.
You end up having to pull your fortunately oversized t-shirt down as far as it can go as you make a mad dash across the facility, back to your dorm. You fall asleep grinning, thinking about how the panties had been a necessary sacrifice.
———
Norms on late night watch, keeping a bored, admittedly not sharp enough eye on the security camera’s feeds. With the rainy season, came an influx of Slinths’. It made sense to have a lookout, and somehow he’d gotten saddled with an overnight shift.
He’d definitely fallen asleep for a few hours. Not that he’d tell anyone of that fact.
There is nothing that could prepare him for what he see’s on the screen, over in the desolate East Bay. First, he thinks that he’s hallucinating, his sleep bogged eyes playing tricks on him.
He rubs them hard with his knuckles, not believing the image that is large and clear on the security footage.
It’s Neteyam. Inside the facility which almost never happened. And he’s bending down, his lips locked with Y/N’s . Kissing her hard and long before she punch’s in the code, and opens the air locked door to let him back out into the shadowy eclipse.
Norm’s learned a lot living on this strange moon- Pandora was mysterious. Full of things his brilliant mind would never understand. So he does what he does’ most of the time.
Minds his own business.
So I’ve had this idea cooking for months, but didn’t have the bandwidth to get it written down. The ideas wouldn’t translate to page and I still kind of feel like they didn’t butttttt whatever. This is pure self indulgence. I am so much more in love with Neteyam now. He is SUCH a good guy. Ugh.
Also, please remember that my requests are OPEN! Send in all that good shit. Come blue alien brain rot with me!
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thisismeracing · 5 months
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Charlieverse | CL16
― Pairing: Charles Leclerc x fem!reader ― Word count: 2.1k ― Warnings: mentions of alcohol and Halloween costumes (clowns, werewolves, and others).  ― Summary: When Yn decided to go to a Halloween party with her best friend, Charles Leclerc, she did not consider that some of the fantasies would be so close to reality that they would terrify her. But one thing Yn had no idea about too, was Charles’ feelings for her. All Hallow’s Eve is not the most romantic scenario to confess your feelings, but it might be just the perfect one for them.
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There are many sayings about how sharing is caring, and how life feels bigger and better when you do so.
Charles knew this all too well.
He was used to sharing everything with you since he was a kid.
It all started after you forgot your snack at home. He was only five years old then, but he had two brothers so he knew exactly what to do. Little Charles offered to share his bag of colored goldfish and grapes with you. The next day you shared your coloring pencils with him. It started with simple things, and it grew as you both grew older. All through the school years, Charles and you were inseparable, even with his crazy racing schedule. You would take notes for him, he would bring you stories, and you would study together until late hours. You shared your fears, deepest feelings, and even the shame of being underdressed when invited to a party such as now.
“I had no idea people would go this hard,” you state, watching as the Taxi driver came to a halt in front of the big doors. Gathered in front of the mansion were people dressed as all kinds of gore Halloween beings, some of the makeup seeming too real to your liking.
“We can go back home and change if you want,” there’s Charles' tranquil voice. He is always the one to keep his patience even if the world is ending, and you love that about him.
You shake your head, “We would never find something else in time, plus, we’re together, so… here’s to another good story,” you point to your matching costumes, and Charles smiles.
You’re both wearing Spiderman costumes. Though it felt like the best choice, the easiest one, you should have guessed it was too easy and, therefore, not ideal.
Charles gives you one last wink before putting on his mask. You do the same just as he opens the door for you, and hand in hand you walk through the crowd into the house. You cling to your best friend’s arm trying to stay as far away as possible from some of the costumes.
“You sure you’re ok over there?” Charles asks when you’re halfway to the kitchen, and you tighten your grip on his hand.
You nod, “Yeah, just.. That werewolf costume seems too realistic.” And there’s no need for you to explain to him. He knows you like he knows the back of his hand, his favorite track, his most played song. Charles knows that someone planted a seed of fear about some creatures when you were little, and some of the stories have stayed with you even after you grew. It is a bit curious how despite your fears, you still love Halloween, at least the kind of parties you go to where people will dress in a way that clearly shows that they are human beings and meant no harm.
Were you supposed to guess that a certain crazy clown costume was a mere costume after seeing people being killed by those?
You wouldn’t stay to answer that question.
When you finally reach the kitchen, both of you take off the mask to your friends, hugging and making your rounds. Charles grabs you two a drink and you choose to stay there instead of mingling and risking bumping into scary figures.
“Can you get me another of these?” You mouth to Charles pointing at your empty cup. From across the kitchen, he nods, and a few seconds later he’s in front of you with a full cup.
“They were out of ice, is it ok if we share this one?” he asks over the music and you nod. You’re sitting on the counter, and when Charles turns to your friends he stands right between your legs. One of your hands goes to his shoulders, and you keep talking about your costume as if your heart weren’t hammering inside your ribcage, almost coming out from your throat the second his hand finds your knee, holding it so your anxious bounce can cease.
You gulp trying to keep your attention on whatever your friend is talking about because all your mind can focus on is your best friend’s hand on you, his body radiating warmth into yours. And not that it is unusual for Charles to touch it, quite the opposite, he loves to hug and kiss those he cares about, but it’s just lately your heart seemed to wish for a different kind of sharing.
It wants to share the secret touches. It wants to claim hungry kisses, tears of happiness, loud silences, and whispered mysteries. It is as if your heart created a reality where you had all of this with Charles.
Your own Charlie-verse.
The party keeps going in full swing, and Charles never leaves your side for over thirty minutes. He comes and goes always checking if you’re ok and if you want to go with him, but you choose the safety of the counter and your crowd of friends. The conversation is good, and so is the booze, from the kitchen you can see a bit of the living room and the pool area through the glass doors.
And it’s only when part of the girls decide to go dancing that you hop off the counter, and grab Charles’ hands following him in the direction of another crowd of friends. You’re tipsy enough to lace your fingers with his and to tighten your grip when you pass people dressed as clowns, werewolves, and with fake open wounds.
You end up in the pool area in front of Charles, he holds your body protectively against his, while his other hand has a cup you’re still sharing. The conversation is between the group, but every once in a while something will catch his attention and he’ll whisper about it in your ear, to which you’ll slightly turn your head, chuckle, and then answer him.
Though you felt a bit out of place at first with how everyone’s costumes seemed so extra compared to yours, you and Charles have had a lot of fun. So much so that you have given up going back home and decided to share a cab to his apartment.
Half of the ride a tipsy Charles is lecturing you with his “I told you so” about how he suggested you slept at his place and you denied it before the party. You just rest your head on his shoulder and pretend you are listening to his non-stop rant.
As it happens, the driver seems a bit uninterested in Charles’ rant because he turns the music on, and the last song that starts playing when he makes the curve into Charles’ street is Michael Jackson. You shriek and start jumping on the car seat.
“Chérie, it’s late,” your best friend tries to reason, but you just giggle.
“You have soundproof walls.”
“But not windows,” he tries again, and you playfully roll your eyes before getting out of the car wishing the driver a good night.
“Annie, are you okay?” you start to sing as you reach the elevators, and Charles just fakes a sigh, holding you close by the waist.
“So, Annie, are you okay? Are you okay, Annie?” you sing loudly until you reach the penthouse.
“Love, that’s not Smooth Criminal’s dance, that’s Thriller…” Charles holds back his laughter when you start a made-up choreography in his living room. “Oh mon dieu, you’re so precious.”
You giggle, smacking a loud kiss on his warm cheeks. While you make your track to the bathroom Charles goes to the kitchen.
“I’m using the guest bathroom! Go shower on the main one, you stinky!” you scream from the corridors and you hear his scoff, almost able to picture his eye roll.
You go through your shower on autopilot, brushing your teeth, and reaching for one of Charles’ shirts that are on the guest bedroom bed. Your visits have been so frequent you have everything you need there, but tonight you didn’t want one of your pajamas, you want to indulge in the daydream that your mind is harnessing.
When you reach your favorite Monegasque bedroom you can hear the shower still running, so you settle in the middle of his bed, staring at the ceiling. Somewhere in your head, there’s still music playing and your body seems to have kept a bit of the buzzing from the party. The distant noises coming from the open windows, along with the wind hitting the curtains lull you into a soft slumber, that only goes away when a door closes, you guess it's his closet, you smell his body wash and shampoo before he steps close to you.
There’s too much happening inside your head, so you choose to stay in silence while your best friend watches you attentively, eyes finding yours in a beat.
Charles, on the other hand, doesn’t have much in his head. He only has you. Your smell, your laugh, your voice, your body on his bed wearing his shirt.
“You’re the prettiest person I’ve ever seen,” his mouth works faster than his brain does, and just like that you’re staring at him in confusion.
It’s like his brain is shortcircuited.
Charles gets up from the bed.
He walks to the door, then turns around and comes back to your side. There’s a crease between his brows and you have known him long enough to identify it as worry.
“Sharls, what’s going on?”
“I’m not drunk ok? Before you say anything, I’m not drunk, I’m just tipsy like you,” he starts and you nod from your spot on the bed. “I am so sorry, but I have to tell you this, and I’ll completely understand if you don’t feel the same, but I have to take this out of my chest, Yn.”
Sensing how serious the situation is you sit up, legs crossed one over the other, hands tucked under them.
“I- uhm… See- It’s like this, I-”
“Charles,” you call.
“I’m in love with you,” he spills in a single sentence, but then he keeps going. “I love you so fucking much it’s starting to hurt the fact that I’ve been keeping it from you. And I don’t even know when it started, but I’m so used to sharing everything with you, I just.. I wanted us to share more. I wanted to share my bed with you, and my clothes, and-” he points with his fingers before you could say something, “And I know we already share those things, but I want to do it differently. I want to share romantically. I want to share my heart with you, Chérie, all of it. But I’ll understand if you’re confused or overwhelmed by my outburst, in fact… shit… I should have waited in case you wanted to go home right? Please, tell me that if you don’t feel the same you’ll at least get the farthest guest bedroom, I promise I won’t bother you, we’ll pretend it didn’t happen in the morning and I-”
“No,” you interrupt.
“Pardon?”
“I said no, I won’t sleep in the farthest guest bedroom.”
“Oh- then let me drive you, just…– fuck I can’t I drank… uhm I’ll–”
“No, Charles, stop,” you get on your knees on the mattress and reach for his arm, bringing his body close to yours.
“No, I’m not sleeping in the guest bedroom because we’re sharing a bed tonight. No, I’m not mad about your admission, I’m sharing my heart with you too. Romantically,” you confess.
His shoulders drop in relief, and you giggle, threading your fingers on his soft strands. Charles mutters something you can’t understand because you’re too focused on how his face seems different from this angle, after all the confessed words. He’s still your Charles, but he’s also a new Charles, and this knowledge brings a new feeling to your heart and stomach.
When his lips find yours, soft and warm, a contrast with his cold hands on your jaw and waist, he presses your bodies closer and hums in pleasure. You smile, unable to contain your happiness. He kisses you like you’ve never been kissed before, and when the air has made itself scarce, you part the kiss, foreheads still touching.
“So, Charlie, are you okay? Are you okay, Charlie?”
Charles throws his head back and laughs.
He knows how insufferable you could get once a song gets stuck in your head.
“I was struck down. You’re such a smooth criminal, Chérie. Stealing hearts around so easily.”
It is your turn to laugh.
“That was cheesy, but I loved it,” you mumble before pressing a kiss to his jaw. “I love you.”
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────── ⋆🪩 VOICEMAIL: Hi, lovelies! I hope you liked the piece, I wanted to add a huge shout-out to Delia (@struggling-with-delia on Tumblr) for proof and beta-reading this <3.  Let me know your thoughts on this piece *mwah*.  
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