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steviebears · 2 years

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First Time

SUMMARY: You and Eddie still haven't had sex, and it's starting to weigh on you. So you finally tell him you want to go all the way.

GENRE: smut (mdni!!!)

WARNINGS: f!reader, established relationship, playfulness, pussy eating, fingering, protected sex, vanilla

a/n: This is my first fic on this blog! Eddie is so hot god help me, I blushed madly while writing this. Enjoy~

Eddie had thought about this a lot. Every time you bent over his eyes were glued to your ass. Whenever you leaned over the D&D table his gaze went straight down your shirt. he tried not to be obvious about the effect you had on him, but the stars in his eyes told a different story. He would cough awkwardly and look away each time you caught him (which was more often than he'd like to admit) and a knowing smile would creep up to your face.

Even when you two were cuddling innocently, all he could think of at times was how soft and warm your skin was. He daydreamed about how soft your boobs probably were. He'd only ever touched them once, on accident, sort of. He was teasing you about your girly blouse and without thinking had just grabbed a handful of you. He played it off well actually, opting for teasing you for getting so flustered over it. You didn't miss the shade of red his cheeks were though.

Eddie knew you had bad past experiences with sex. He was very understanding of that fact and never advanced on you to do anything, but that was starting to bother you. It made you sad how he would have to leave to the bathroom after each one of your heated makeouts to take care of himself, no matter how understanding he was.

What bothered you more was the wetness in your panties from imagining him jerking off there. If you were lucky, you could hear a groan from the other side of that stupid door.

His pillowy lips were moving swiftly against yours as you try to keep up. The kiss was getting progressively more sloppy with each swipe of his tongue on yours. taking initiative, you opt to change position and shift into his lap. He smiles into the kiss when you push on the back of his head to get him closer to you.

The longer this kiss went on, the harder he got. It didn't take much to get him riled up. Especially not when you're wearing his shirt and looking as pretty as ever on top of him like this. he breaks away to take another look.

Your lips were reddening and slightly swollen from all the friction and your chest heaved up and down with each deep breath you took. He licks his lips at the sight of your nipples through his shirt.

"Well as much as I'm enjoying this, princess, I should probably excuse myself." No, no. Not again. Not when you're so hot and bothered from feeling his hard length underneath your thigh. He starts to lift you off of him with ease, but you stop him.

"Eddie." He looks up at you, his grip on your waist loosening. you gulp.

"Eddie, I don't want you to leave. Please don't." You found it difficult to get out what you really wanted to say; 'fuck me!'. He tilts his head, his smile softening. You sigh and look away for a second before returning your gaze to him. He raises an eyebrow, waiting for you to go on. He can tell you're holding something back.

"What is it, doll?" A part of you thinks he already knows based on the cadence in his voice but you can't take this anymore. so you squeeze your eyes shut and blurt it out.

"Please fuck me!" Your face turns crimson as you realize what you'd just said and your eyes shoot open to gage his reaction. He has the widest tight lipped smile you'd ever seen before he starts giggling. you slump over and hit his shoulder, whining at him for laughing at you.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." He apologizes through his grin.

"If it's any consolation, I would love to. I was just surprised." he smiles sweetly at you trying to ease your embarrassment. he still lifts you off of him but lays you down and hovers over you.

"And since you asked so nicely..." He smirks before leaning down to kiss you again, softer this time. He couldn't really keep himself from breaking the kiss every so often when he was smiling so hard. His hands stroked your sides, his touch lingering around your waist where the hem of your jeans laid. His fingers crawled their way to the button and undid it, but not without asking you for reassurance. He finally pried your jeans from you, tossing them aside his bed before laying his eyes on you innocent and cute white panties adorned with a wet patch in the center. You were too perfect.

"My, my Y/n. If I had known you were this worked up about it I would have done this a lot sooner." He snickers to himself, driving you nuts. Could he just touch you already?

You whine and stick up your hips, physically begging him to rid you of your underwear. He chuckles and his deep brown eyes meet yours. He gives you a genuine and excited smile that you return without hesitation. He really was so appreciative of you trusting him like this. He hooks his finger on your underwear and pulls them down while kissing gently down your neck.

his two fingers softly touch your cunt, slowly lapping up your wetness before he settles himself between your thighs. The sight of him there looking up at you was enough to coax a moan from your throat.

Eddie trails kisses from your inner thigh to you clit, you flinching when his lips press down on it. He licks a fat stripe up you and leans back for a second, locking eyes with you.

"You taste like a fucking candy." He says in a low voice. You were sure you didn't but you took the compliment with a blush. He leaves a few kitten licks to your clit and then dips his tongue inside you. The action drew a moan from you and he groaned at the feeling of you clenching around his tongue. The vibrations had your heart beating even faster.

He latched his lips around your clit, gently sucking as his teeth grazed you ever so softly. This goes on for a little while, and the familiar feeling of a knot tightening in your stomach began.

He leans away for a bit of air and he catches the way you are repeatedly clenching around nothing. He sticks his middle finger in his mouth, pulling off the ring and spitting it to the side. The sight was erotic.

He dives back in, sucking on your clit while licking when he slowly pushes his wet finger into your hole, the stretch feeling indescribably good to you. He experimentally curls his finger and you nearly scream when he hits that spot, hands diving to his hair. You can feel his simper and he continues his ministrations. He looks up to see the labored rise and fall of your tummy.

"Shit, shit." You pant as the knot tightens more and more, threatening to snap. Eddie adds his ring finger and that is enough to push you over the edge, your legs snapping around his head while a loud moan escapes you. Your entire body trembles, and he doesn't mind the pressure to the sides of his head. He could die happy between your thighs.

Once you'd ridden out your high and your legs relaxed, he kissed your heat one last time before pulling his fingers out. You whine, hating the empty feeling. At least you knew it wouldn't last long.

Your eyes widen at the sight of Eddie's cute face covered in your wetness, a pleased smile on his face. He reaches your face and kisses you, the faint taste of yourself present in his mouth.

"That was... the hottest thing ever." He mumbles as you gently wipe his face. In response, you grind up to his bulge, the denim providing a deliciously rough texture to your sensitive core. He groans into your ear and the sound makes your whole body feel hot.

"Are you sure, sweetheart? We can stop, no questions asked." He asks for your consent again and worries you may feel uncomfortable.

"Of course I'm sure. I love you." He lights up like a christmas tree and nods.

"I love you too. More than anything." he mumbles the last of his sentence into your neck as he begins to grind down his hips against yours. You get impatient and reach for his belt buckle, your giddy hands fumbling with it until you can get to unbutton his jeans and pull both them and his underwear off. He was bigger than you thought, and your breath turns nervous. Eddie can hear it. So, he caresses your face and you can see the strong emotion in his deep eyes.

"I'm serious. No questions asked." He repeats.

"And I'm serious. I want you." You reassure and kiss him for the thousandth time that night.

"I just didn't expect you to be so big, you rascal. You were hiding that from me for this long?" He laughs and shrugs his shoulders with a flustered look on his face.

"It's all yours now princess." you giggle and pull him in while you reach down and stroke him a few times before giving him the sign you were ready. He couldn't believe your cute hands were doing something so dirty. He reaches to the pillow next to yours and pulls a condom from underneath it, earning a sly smirk from you and a coy look from him.

He moans quietly when he pushes into you and presses a kiss to your forehead when he sees your face scrunch up. The stretch was much better than his fingers. He stills and lets you adjust for a moment before you beg him to move, to which he teased you for being so desperate.

His thrusts are slow and deep, passionate. You can feel his love pouring into you with each snap of his hips.

"Fuck, you feel so good. So tight." He says in such a seductive tone that it makes you moan out loud. He loves when you do that. When you lose control, show yourself unfiltered. He thought it was the sexiest thing you could do. And lucky for him, you'd keep doing it.

The closer you got to cumming again the more you lost your composure. You'd started meeting his thrusts, making him go even deeper and hit the spots you could never get on your own.

Your whimpers were his new favorite song, and that's saying something. Beating Black Sabbath? You were really something to him.

And then you started pulling on his hair, and he knew he wasn't going to last long. He was clenching his jaw, trying to keep his noises in, but it only worked for so long. Soon he was moaning and groaning into your ear. It only turned you on more (if that was even possible) and you wrapped your legs around him.

His eyes were darting from your bouncing tits under his hellfire shirt and you face that was contorting in pleasure.

You felt the knot start to snap again and you told eddie between your breaths. You came again, your body spasming and tightening around him. The clench of your walls was enough to bring him there too, and his abs tensed and the grip he had on the pillow behind you tightened when he released with a deep groan. He stayed still for a moment, the only sound being the remanence of your moans, now soft whimpers, and the heavy breathing of Eddie.

"Fuck. I have never cum so hard in my life." He confesses with a chuckle, pulling out of you gently and rolling to your side.

"You okay?" He turns to you and asks. You smile.

"Never better, handsome." He loved when you called him that. He kissed your shoulder.

Eventually Eddie got up and cleaned you both up before insisting you drink a glass of water. You both fell asleep fast after that. His head in your chest, hugging you, you playing with his hair.

#eddie #eddie munson #eddie munson stranger things #eddie munson x reader #stranger things season 4 #st4 #stranger things season four #stranger things #stranger things 4 #eddie munson smut #eddie munson blurb #eddie munson fanart #eddie munson edit #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson fic #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson oneshot

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nobodysdaydreams · 3 months

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I have many questions about Pryce and Cutter's backstory, but I mostly want to know more about their insecurities and failures. Also, do they have bones?

(Or my reaction to Episodes 55-58 of Wolf359).

Welcome back dear readers! Should I have reacted to more Wolf359 this weekend? No. I have work to do. But, like Doug Eiffel himself, I cannot just let a cliff hanger like that go unfinished. The events of the last two episodes have been spinning in my head for the last 24 hours and I need ANSWERS DANG IT. Will this lead me to an even bigger cliffhanger that I will surely regret later? Probably, but that's the risk we need to take. As Doug Eiffel said "a leap of faith".

Tagging the mutuals who got me invested in this, and if you want to be tagged or untagged from these posts, lmk, or you can follow my blog or simply follow the tag "#bods wolf359 reactions". Anyone who has followed me for a while knows my updates are inconsistent, so I apologize in advance for that and for any spelling/grammar mistakes in my posts.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom @lovelyladylavie

Episode 55: A Place For Everything

Okay, before we start this episode, a few thoughts that have been going through my head:

Obviously Minkowski is brainwashed sadly :( BUT:

Is Jacobi brainwashed too because Kepler ratted him out, or is Jacobi playing as a double agent?

Did Pryce and Cutter brainwash Kepler too, or is he on their team?

Hera is clearly fighting Pryce to warn Doug, but how much is she able to fight past her?

Can Pryce and Cutter even brainwash Lovelace considering she's an alien clone?

I need to figure out where everyone is. I need to know what happened. Was there a struggle or did Cutter just stroll in and snap his fingers?

Oh we're going back in time. Nice to see Minkowski, Jacobi, and Lovelace working together for as long as it lasts.

Okay so they are looking for Doug, and find Dr. Evil and her psychotic murder business man boyfriend instead.

It's nice that they're doing so much to rescue Doug though. But he really should have talked this through with them. And then they all should get the heck out of there before Cutter shows up.

Kepler. BE QUIET. Has he learned nothing? Does he have a death wish?

Kepler: "There are limits to the human body...I'm not talking about Eiffel. Give them a chance to catch their breath" Wow, such caring words from the man who risked the lives of his crew just to get a bottle of Whiskey back.

"Since when you are worried about pushing people too far." GREAT QUESTION MINKOWSKI.

Oh you "knew" Jacobi was on your side did you Kepler? "Maybe there's other things I've been wrong about." NOW? You're figuring this out now, Kepler? It took you that long? Is he awkwardly trying to grab a redemption arc too? I want to hope so, but something tells me he'll flip the second Pryce and Cutter show up.

"Just be wrong quietly" I love Minkowski

A shuttle? Shoot it. SHOOT IT.

Oh great Cutter has a message.

Wow, he even made a fake "We're not your enemy" message.

HERA CAN'T STOP THEM FROM DOCKING. NO NO NO NO NO.

And what are they doing to Lovelace.

Does Kepler know it's them? Oh yeah. He and Hera know. Everyone knows now. Oh boy...

Yeah. Really really bad is an understatement. I hope you guys have a plan. A really really good plan.

Well here come the bad guys.

"Who's gonna come through those doors? High level SI-5?" Jacobi doesn't even know...oh Kepler you really kept them in the dark didn't you?

Um. What was that. Four people? Who are they?

Another Australian guy?

Oh is that Rachel Young? Ew. Why is she there?

Ah...there he is. Yes, Cutter they did have quite a party. Shame you're here to ruin it. "You look awful" don't insult Kepler, Cutter. That's MY job.

THEY TOOK OVER THE MINDS OF THE HERMES CREW? So that's why they're following them.

"This is just a formality, don't you Daniel? Just until you can be...processed." Okay, so he's gonna brainwash him.

And Cutter has been 100% listening in on EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING. Who are you lying for? Those "reports" are probably just so he knows how much information you're willing to tell him.

And...there she is.

Oh Cutter named the AI? Interesting.

She said "no" Pryce, does she need to say it again?

HERA DON'T TELL HER THAT.

Oh dear. They got Hera too now.

I'm surprised more people aren't freaking out about Pryce and Hera sharing a voice.

"Neither of them is my type" Then...who is Jacobi, also what do you think picking the lock will do?

Yep. Brainwashed Zombies.

"I'm an SI-5 agent in good standing..." Jacobi, that doesn't matter anymore.

"There isn't someone worse that still hasn't showed up" Oh...but you haven't considered the dear listeners.

Okay so we got Cutter, Rachel, Pryce, a black ops agent, some brainwashed zombies they picked up from Hermes, and...wait what's wrong with Pryce's eyes? Is she a cyborg?

Huh. Pryce would need to be 50 at least to have written the space manual. And Cutter would too, but did so under a different name. Oh this is a development. I assumed they were like in their 50s/60s being played by 20 something years old actors...but I guess they actually do look that young...

...

...I guess they have a great skin care routine? Diet? Biotech? Are they both cyborgs? Do they replace parts of themselves whenever they break down? And if so...just how old are they?

Oh Doug is back! Poor Hera. You can save him, Hera. I know you can.

"Hi Doug :)" Don't like that.

"The Sol" of course Cutter would name it after the sun. He sees himself at the center of the universe.

"Renee is fine. Healthy as a horse" shut it Cutter!

"Hera? Is that you?" I love that Doug is the one that picked up on that and Pryce, being mistaken for Hera is the biggest compliment you could ever hope to get.

Counterpart?

"Why do you have Hera's voice?" Because Miranda is evil and likes to play god. Oh my gosh, they literally do think of themselves as gods. Not them quoting scripture too, I swear with each and every episode Cutter and Pryce make me want to vomit. You're not gods. You're just every other selfish terrible lazy parent who has a kid and thinks that they have a right to control the course of their life. Just because you make or create someone doesn't give you the right to do whatever you want with them!

"What?" MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY DOUG.

"1,001 pains in my ass Pryce?" TELL HER DOUG! It's the least of her crimes, but we have to start somewhere.

The...the next you? What um...what happened to the real Carter?

Don't call Doug "good boy" ONLY HERA GETS TO DO THAT.

"You have not been doing a good job as communications officer." HE JUST CONTACTED THE ALIENS. He's the best communications officer you could ever hope to have. Sure, up until now he's done a terrible job, and openly neglected his duties, but this is what happens when you send random ex-convicts with known substance abuse issues and obviously ADHD up into space instead of, oh I don't know, rehabilitating them???

"4 months ago, you took a while to get up here." Exactly what I've been saying.

So they got to Hermes two months ago, but...oh the aliens kept them away! And now Bob let them in, oh no. See Doug, this is why you should have talked to the crew first.

"Go screw yourself" Tell them Doug. They deserve to hear it.

Oh Miranda's torture chair. Of course they have one of those.

"Too bad" it's so unsettling how much Miranda sounds like Hera.

Hopefully, Bob managed to give Doug's mind a little resistance.

It seems that Rachel and Kepler don't get along so well. Bit of a rivalry there?

"Deliver or you're off the team" I don't like that motto.

Oh hi Australian guy. I'm sure my mutuals will be more than happy to tell me more about who he is. But since he's evil and not that interesting, I don't really care.

"He makes you disappear, Warren" Rachel seemed way too happy about that. I always thought she and Warren were on the same level, but I think someone just got promoted and someone else might be getting demoted.

"It will take some time to uncouple it from all the Star Wars trivia" good work Doug, keep the hyper fixation noise in your brain.

"Do you ever get a little tired of hearing yourself speak?" Doug is asking the best questions!

"Defiant until the end. You gotta respect that." "No, you don't." It's interesting how much Pryce and Cutter seem to differ in that Pryce stays very guarded and cold while Cutter embraces a very fake pleasant exterior.

"I am never following your orders ever again." Doug...I love you calling them out, but please do not tempt fate. The more you push, they more they push back. They clearly have a thing for breaking people (and machines).

"That wasn't an offer. There's not an element of choice here." Yeah...saw that coming. Sorry Doug. :(

Hopefully Hera can save him and Minkowski.

Oh Jacobi's been dragged off. So did they get him too?

Ew Rachel's here too. Oh and they have a way to hurt Lovelace. But can they kill her if she's an alien?

"Critical system failure" you go Lovelace!

"I owe you a coke." So apparently Pryce and Cutter don't stay young by avoiding sugar.

New friends? Oh no, he's going to show Lovelace what he did to her friends.

UPGRADE TO THE FULL VERSION? Like Hermes? Deleting certain thoughts? Oh my gosh. Like it's irreversible? Do they want to make the whole world like that?

And also if they had that the entire time, why have they not used that on everyone at Goddard from the beginning? They wouldn't have so many problems if they did that from the beginning. But I suppose that if they can't do the full version right away, the tech is probably pretty complex and expensive.

Okay so Raymond is the name of Australian guy. (Got it from the credits).

Well. At least they didn't get Lovelace's mind. We have that to be thankful for.

Episode 56: Idle Hands

Once again, another episode with no opening credits they just take you right in don't they?

So...is Jacobi not brainwashed? He seems agreeable, but not as robotic as Minkowski.

"Don't push them too hard." "Well it's not like they feel it" "I only turned off their pain receptors. They still have bones, primitive things." Miranda, DO YOU NOT HAVE BONES? WHAT ARE YOU?

Great, now I have the bananas have no bones song stuck in my head.

"It's not like any of them are gonna be alive much longer" And perhaps neither will any of you.

AND STOP WITH THE UNIT 214 STUFF.

"No need to speak. Just give me the sum." Interesting. Miranda really hates the sound of Hera's voice.

"What are you trying to accomplish with these attempts at resistance?" You designed her Miranda. You built and created her. She has your voice. You gave her a personality, presumably similar to yourself. You declared yourself her god. So here's an idea. Why don't you figure it out for yourself?

"My name is HERA...screw you" I'm glad Hera told her off, but the way that Pryce and Cutter scold Eiffel and Hera like they're disappointing children...you really do feel the age gap now.

MINKOWSKI CALLS HER UNIT 214 NOW???

"Things are going to be okay." Did they get Jacobi too? Oh they did.

"Just because they can't talk back doesn't mean they-" good point Hera. We understood what you meant.

Also: "I'll find a way to discipline her later." ... Well, well, well. Looks like someone slipped up there for a moment, didn't you Miranda? What happened to "not her. It?" All of a sudden Hera is a her now? And you talk about her like a disappointing child. But since you clearly just view her as an object, I have to wonder, is it hard losing an argument to someone who sounds like you? Someone who expresses a part of yourself that you perhaps, are a little insecure about? See, Miranda, that's the problem with the whole "playing god" thing. You can act all proud of yourself for making something in your own image, but if you don't like yourself, you might not like the image that looks back at you. Happens to real parents with children all the time. Happens to every human who spends too much time together and starts picking up each other's habits. I am going to enjoy writing some fic about you, Miranda /ominous.

"I'll get creative" I'm sure you will, Miranda. And so will I.

"She was always very persistent" "Watch yourself Warren. You don't want to sound like you admire it" well, it looks like RACHEL knows to refer to Hera as an it, and Kepler doesn't, so it seems Miranda really did slip up there. It's not a writer's mistake if they're being so intentional a few minutes later. Oh, this is going to be so fun for me.

"Pryce gets everyone sooner or later" And Hera was made in her image, Rachel. You might want to think about that.

"Pryce doesn't delete AI, she just corrects them" Oh, the AI that sound exactly like her? The ones that sound just like her? She finds their flaws and corrects them, does she? Not at all reflecting her own self-esteem issues I'm sure.

Replaced cranial architecture? Just because Miranda was bored? Wow, she and Cutter really are the worst.

Rachel is also the worst. Oh and Warren calls her "Miss. Young" while she calls him Warren...I guess they're not on the same level at Goddard or if they were...that's for sure over now and Kepler knows it too.

"I'm not worried about her." It's okay to worry about things other than Whiskey, Kepler. A little character complexity before you die won't be a horrible thing.

"Something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy." And it sounds like Rachel would wish a lot on her enemies. So...what is happening with Lovelace?

Cutter's playing Funzo with her? I assume it's Funzo, but they seem to be playing something. Oh Backgammon. 😂

So this is what Rachel was referring to. Oh the parallels between Cutter and Pryce and Doug and Hera just write themselves at this point.

Lovelace: "I don't eat with creeps" Cutter: 🥺 ...me?

Yes you, you evil creepy murder man.

"I mind every second that you exist." Same Lovelace.

Cutter is smoking? "We all have our vices" That is the LEAST of your vices Cutter. Also between the sodas and cigarettes, clearly Pryce and Cutter haven't been staying alive and looking young due to healthy habits.

"You seem tense" very observant Cutter.

What is it with this man and chai lattes? I've seen a few untagged posts about it, I thought people were exaggerating.

"Miranda and I don't agree on everything" "Tell me you're not about to make me do marriage counseling for you and your work wife" CALL HIM OUT ON IT LOVELACE. 😂 "Even for you that's too evil."

"Miranda is...wonderful. But she can be a little cold." Ah. I see. So you and work wifey disagree on how best to torture people. Luring them into a false sense of security vs. being unfeeling and dark from the start. I suppose that's why they work together, to strike that unhealthy balance.

"I don't wanna do that. It's messy. And that's not how I want to do that. We can be better." So they're doing the good cop, bad cop routine?

And something tells me Lovelace doesn't want a pony. I think she wants you dead.

"Compromise is the cornerstone of a good work marriage" so he doesn't deny it then.

Cutter really is an old man. The smoking, the board games, it's only a matter of time before he starts playing bingo, watching wheel of fortune, and talking about how it was "back when he was young whippersnapper".

I swear, if Cutter and Pryce try to drop their tragic backstories...

Who is asking for Unit 214? Oh Doug. This is so sad. "Thank you 214 :)" "Yeah whatever" "Is everything okay?" EVEN BRAINWASHED HE STILL CARES ABOUT HER. "Pryce is nice" No, she's not Doug!

What happened? HE CALLED HER HERA! DOUG IS BACK! DOUG IS BACK! Doug, you have to pretend, but this is good. He's back. Our boy is back. 💕 Did talking to Hera bring him back?

YES HE IS BACK BABY. TAKE THAT CUTTER, YOU NASTY OLD FART!

"I was alone" Oh...oh. Hera's I am alone monologue. :( 💔

Doug talk like a robot! You need it to be believable. Oh Doug, don't become an actor. Thankfully Australian guy (Raymond, whatever) doesn't seem to be the most perceptive.

"It could have been worse. It could have been Dr. Pryce" Yep. Way worse.

What is Pryce doing that has RACHEL of all people so rattled? I don't like those sounds.

Oh her eye? And I guess that looks pretty gross. And still needs routine adjustment too. Well, well, I think we found some more insecurity. My "ripping apart the villains" sniffer is sniffing out some good stuff here.

Oh yippie. Jacobi's here to help.

Performance review? Review of who? Kepler? Style is Marcus's department, that is very true. HOW BADLY DO YOU NEED JACOBI? oh Kepler is gonna be tested isn't he? Are they gonna make him torture and shoot a compliant Jacobi?

"Boring again..." you're one to talk Cutter. It's always the same with you people.

DOUG, HE CAN TOTALLY TELL. Oh good Cutter is preoccupied and leaving them alone. Just say "yes sir" in a monotoned voice Doug!

Phew. I guess Cutter isn't used to doubting his work wife.

"Wanna know a secret?" 😂😂😂

What's funny is that Cutter could totally make Doug do that to trick her. Oh it looks like Lovelace thought of that.

Doug be incompetent and make references. Not even Pryce and Cutter can fake that. See? She believed that!

Headache? What does that mean? Lovelace's blood? Oh.

So what I'm hearing is that we need to do a few blood transfusions.

"Dr. Pryce can see and hear everything" then you might need to leave Hera.

"I'm here to help! 🥰" Jacobi seems cheery.

Examination table? What are Pryce and Cutter doing to him?

"How old was Dr. Maxwell?" 28. That's...that's young, oh no. That's so sad. Cutter knows it's Kepler's fault too. He's never gonna be done getting tortured with this.

Oh right. His arm is gone, I keep forgetting. They're giving him a prosthetic arm? Well they could have been far less ominous about that. "Prove you belong here." Um...how? He's giving him reading homework? Well that was less ominous than I thought. Wayyyy less ominous.

Hearing Jacobi like this is so funny, I'm sorry. Hopefully, Doug got him the blood and hopefully Jacobi keeps his mouth shut.

Oh. Jacobi didn't make it. Doug you can't risk losing the ground you have. You don't have 10 minutes!

Oh no. It's not Jacobi is it?

Ah. Kepler /derogatory.

I don't know about that Kepler, but I think you might be drowning in Whiskey.

Episode 57: The Devil's Plaything

Nice of them to take us directly back to Kepler's "well, well, well".

"I'm done here" That's the most you've sounded like a robot all day Doug!

See?

Oh and Jacobi is back!

I see Jacobi doesn't know about Kepler's new prosthetic upgrades.

"Putting an end to this. Blowing up the Hephaestus." I hate to say it, but that might be the only solution now.

Doug. Look. I know. I would never pick this solution. But think about your daughter.

Oh, Jacobi has plans to get them off. But um... WHAT ABOUT HERA? She IS the Hephaestus. Can you um...make her the sol? Oh, the sol can hold her consciousness? Well that's good, but Maxwell would be really useful right now. If only Kepler had been the one to go.

That is a good question Doug. Why didn't you get Minkowski first?

Oh gross. Doug. Doug. Do not talk to her. Don't talk to Rachel Young. Don't talk to Dr. Pryce.

"Are you there?" It might not be safe to speak. But Hera is always there, she said so herself.

Visual and thermal sensors? Good plan, but won't Pryce notice?

"As long as it's not Jacobi" *flashes to Jacobi*

"How are things?" Not the best time for small talk Jacobi.

Jacobi knew one of them? This is so sad. He's...yeah they're gone. No one comes back from what Pryce did. 💔 "What they did to them is what you wanted Maxwell to do to me" That was rough, but fair. Jacobi needed to hear that. I like his redemption arc. I'm glad to see it's finally going somewhere.

Rachel really hates Doug 😂

Doug please don't talk to yourself. And remember, you technically can't feel pain. Pretend it's an inconvenience. Why does Rachel sound like a schoolteacher yelling at a first grader while Doug moans and whimpers? 😂

"Oh hello Eiffel. You're bleeding." Indeed, Minkowski.

"Everything is going to be fine." Why do I feel like that might be a phrase Cutter and Pryce use to hypnotize them or something, they say it constantly.

"You just stuck a needle in my neck. That wasn't very nice of you" 😂 Please this is too funny.

"Everything is going to be okay." SEE? SHE LET HIM GO!

Oh no. He called her Hera. Pryce won't allow that.

"Why are you calling her that?" I knew it! Just come up with something... um...Cutter asked me to call her that for his amusement?

oh and even "it's all okay" won't save him now.

How did Minkowski get the walkie-talkie? Oh dear. She's been under the longest too. And she's a trained solider. Doug you should have shot the comms system faster!

"Commander?" "Not quite." "I'm putting the lieutenant on manual." PRYCE CAN JUST SPEAK THROUGH THEM?

DOUG DON'T TELL HER! DON'T TELL HER!

"Don't delude yourself boy" It's little things like calling Doug "boy" that make me realize how old Pryce and Cutter really are. At first I thought they were boomers, but are they from the early 1900s because they seem even older than boomers sometimes just by the way they talk.

Oh dear what's happening now.

"Eiffel is sacrificing himself, what a hero" 😂 Jacobi, never change. Well, do change, but not your sense of humor. That can stay.

The airlock? She's making Minkowski leave out the airlock?

Oh Pryce is onto Jacobi too! "Go to hell" "not before the lieutenant does" Just because you're doing there doesn't mean everyone is Pryce.

Hopefully the alien blood protects them?

Gross. Rachel and Hermes zombies. The worst.

Minkowski! Come back! You can do it!

The Hermes crew went down! They did it! And yes! Punch Young in the face!

No. Not Minkowski. No. She needs to see her husband again!

SHE'S BACK! NOW RUN! RUN FAR AND FAST!

"Have they hit you with a wrench before?" well, no, but they did try it. That's what happens when you lose Jacobi, Rachel. You get hit with wrenches.

Oh poor Hera. It's not your fault.

Alive or dead? Alive, if you can manage. Well at least that's good...I think...

"Only a set back" well let's hope not Cutter. Not interested in your idea of fun.

Episode 58: Quiet, Please

Is this episode about Kepler or Cutter? Because I need them both to be quiet.

Oh right, the plant monster. Good thing Minkowski set up all those weapon stations! Now let's go hunt the real monsters.

The new plan can't be the old plan. Hera told them everything. They know. It's not her fault Jacobi!

Hera, you have to realize that you can't hear this. You have to trust that they will get you off the ship. "Show that WOMAN some respect" YES MINKOWSKI. Very true. But also, you need to make sure they have no way to hear about your plans.

Cutter is also probably waiting on the sol for them in a big evil chair. He's likely practicing his evil speech right now.

This would be a great time for the plant monster to come back and kill Cutter. I wish they keep him around. 💔🪴

"As long as I don't have to be out there" *cuts to Doug out there*

"The only time you're getting visuals from one place" "It's weird I don't like it" Interesting. It probably does feel weird to Hera.

And there goes Doug. I just imagine Kepler telling Pryce "don't worry. I've been tracking them and I'm positive they're in storage, right behind this door" only for Doug to go screaming and flying past the window as Pryce stares at Kepler with a deadpan look.

Talking uses air. Good point. Perhaps they should all talk less. The good news is we haven't heard from Whiskey boy the entire episode. Perhaps he's giving Pryce and Rachel the Whiskey monologue as they go through the ship.

"You're other left" once again Doug is me.

As we listen to Doug go on this journey, I once again return to Kepler's prosthetic arm. I wonder if they can hack it.

Wait what's happening now? Oh the security system is active? Oh dear.

I'm just waiting for things to go wrong. There's no way Cutter Pryce and the gang aren't onto them.

Biometric or retinal... do they need Pryce's eyes? Oh she has spare eyes. I wonder what happens if they break. And how she lost her original eyes. 👁️

"Everyone in favor of going to the lab say "eye"" Lol, "the eyes have it" I love it.

I just know they're gonna show up. I know it. I'm just waiting for it.

There's no way Miranda would leave her lab this unsecured.

Oh...she has a lot of eyes does she? THEY MOVE? Ew. Well... I guess Pryce needs a lot of backups. If I were them I'd just grab one. What's so gross and unsettling about it? I mean, I get that they're eyes that move, but...they make it sound so horrifying. I guess this really must be Miranda's insecurity.

Did he drop the eye? Oh no. This just keeps getting worse. And why wouldn't you grab a backup and smash the rest? If Miranda needs backups, it must be for a reason! Make sure she can't see. It's like smashing someone's glasses or destroying their contact lenses. Get whatever upper hand you can!

Oh. Hi Raymond. Didn't expect you to be here. Um...what now?

An inspiring speech from Doug. Yes, give Hera a moment. I believe in her. 💕

Oh never mind it's Kepler. Gross.

Oh right, Pryce can see in the dark because of her eyes.

"I don't kill people. It's wasteful. I value all my workers highly" I hate Pryce. She's clearly mad about how they broke out of her restraints.

Recycle it! Good work Doug. Recycling and reusing is good the planet. Of course, we're in space, but...oh fire code. ♻️

Oh so Eiffel, Minkowski, Pryce, and Kepler are ejected in space?

Well. Um... that's an awkward group. Perhaps they can play a little Funzo?

Okay, now I REALLY can't listen to anymore. I've wasted way too much time procrastinating. But we're coming to the end now, which is exciting. See you (hopefully) soon everyone!

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anxiousbread · 1 month

Text

Tips & Tricks: Splat Charger and E-liter 4K

(Apologies in advance if it's formatted bad, this was written and posted on mobile)

Hi! I'm the person who got 3-star freshness on every weapon in Splatoon 3. Through my experience, I've picked up little bits and pieces on how to play the game better. So, why not share some of that knowledge?

Today, I'll be talking about Chargers. More specifically, the Splat Charger and E-liter, and their Scoped variants. Why talk about them both? I feel they're similar enough that the advice I'd give for one can more or less be applied to the other. That said, I will still talk about each kit individually.

The advice I'd like to give is to learn and remember three key points: Aim, Awareness, and Aggressiveness. Or – as an easy to remember acronym – AAA.

Aim is the most important, and the first thing you should try and learn. Aim is good for every weapon (but especially chargers) as you are limited in how fast you can take another shot if you miss. As a charger, you have a really powerful weapon that is outranged by very little. However, if you can't hit anything with it, it's not very useful. The laser sight can help you Aim, but remember that everyone can see it. Something you could do to help improve your Aim is going into the lobby (or the training room, by pressing Y when selecting a weapon) and practicing hitting the moving targets. Or, if you have a friend, you could set up a private battle, and just have them run around while you try to shoot them.

Awareness is also incredibly important, but it can take a bit longer to pick up on. Awareness includes things like tracking where your enemies are, and being able to figure out if you should keep fighting, or backup and regroup. Again, it's good to have Awareness with other weapons, but as a Charger, most times you'll be the backline. You'll be a high priority target for specials, and usually the last one alive on your team. I don't have as much advice for Awareness, because it's a harder thing to practice. Things to look out for are splashes in the ink that show where someone is swimming, or the UI at the top of the screen that'll show who's alive, and who has a special charged up, waiting to be activated. It'll also show if someone's an Inkling or an Octoling, but that isn't as important. Also, if you're using a Scope, you'll need to be a lot more aware. This is because when you're aiming, you'll zoom into a first person view.

And lastly, Aggressiveness. I wouldn't try learning this one until you've at least got a grasp on the other two first. Aggressiveness is how much you should move around, because if you stay in one spot the whole game, you won't do a whole lot. As a Charger, you have a lot of range, so finding unexpected angles where you can hit people from can end up drawing your opponent's attention – and sometimes, their resources – away from the objective. This can allow your team to swoop in and overwhelm them. An important thing for being aggressive is to always have an escape plan. Either make sure you have an easy path out, or you have a lot of Quick Super Jump on your gear. If you don't have an escape and you get surrounded, you'll leave your team at a disadvantage, unless they help you. The best way to practice this is to just go into a game and mess around. Things that have helped me be more aggressive are when there's another backline on my team, which forces me to play in different spots; or when there's a good Charger on the other team, which means I need to be able to find places where I can hit them easier than they can hit me. Remember to be aware if you're playing in a more risky position, so that you aren't just throwing yourself at a brick wall and ending up going 2-16.

Now, on to how the kits can influence your playstyle.

Splat Charger and Splatterscope come with Splat Bomb and Ink Vac. Splat Bomb is always nice to have, and it can help if you need to get someone out from behind a wall, as Charger shots always go straight. It will take 70% of your ink tank to use, though, so I would recommend using a little bit of Ink Saver(Sub) if you plan on using it. Ink Vac is good for helping protect your team-mates, but you need to be close enough for it to actually have an effect. If you're too far back, you won't be protecting anything, but if you're too far forward, you can get punished when your Ink Vac ends. And, you can't forget, you'll get a strong explosive shot when either the special ends naturally or when the Ink Vac is filled up. It'll scale with how much Ink you sucked up, so try and at least get a little bit of Ink in there before it ends.

The alternate kits are Z+F Splat Charger and Z+F Splatterscope. They come with Splash Wall and Triple Inkstrike. Splash Wall is great for being aggressive, as you get to block some shots to give you enough time to shoot back. Try and learn the spacing for how far out you throw the Splash Wall, so that you can maximise your effective range while being safe. Remember that Splash Wall has a lot of Ink Recovery Lag, so try not to throw one out unless you need to. Triple Inkstrike is a great Special for a backline weapon, as you won't be in nearly as much danger when you activate it, and you'll be able to have a good spot to throw the Inkstrikes without having to back up or throw them up higher. Use the Inkstrikes to block out a space, forcing people into your line of sight where you can Splat them, or forcing them back into an unfavourable spot, where they won't be able to affect the match much from.

On the E-liter side, we have the E-liter 4K and E-liter 4K Scope, equipped with Ink Mines and Wave Breaker. Out of the 4 Kits I'm talking about, I see this with the least aggressive potential. That doesn't mean it's bad, though. I think Ink Mines are a good sub for E-liter, as you can set them up on a flank and be alerted when an enemy tries to go through there, really helping with your awareness. You can only have two active at a time, and if you place any more they'll explode so that there are only two, starting with the oldest. Wave Breaker can help you keep or gain control of an area, by locating anyone nearby when it's first placed or when they're hit by a wave. The waves will also deal 45 damage, so you don't always need to use a full charge if someone is hit by a wave. If you can figure out how people act when they're tracked, you can predict what they'll do when the tracker goes away, and catch them when they think you don't know where they are anymore.

The alternate kits for E-liter are Custom E-liter 4K and Custom E-liter 4K Scope. If you pick one of those up, you'll find yourself with Squid Beakons and a Kraken Royale. Squid Beakons are nice for not only you, but your whole team! Try placing them in spots where you'll want to go, or places that are out of the way. Without any Ink Savers, you'll be left with one shot after placing one, so remember to recover your ink when you do place one. You can have three active at once, and, like Ink Mines, they'll destroy themselves if too many are placed, starting with the oldest. I recommend using Sub Power Up, as it decreases the Super Jump time when Jumping to a Beakon for everyone. Kraken Royale is a fun special. On E-liter, it's good for if you are getting rushed down. Activate it before they get to you, and you'll be able to easily fight back. But remember, it has a long start up and long end lag to make up for the fact that you become invincible when using it. It doesn't last for too long, however, so make sure you have an escape planned. Your Beakons may be able to help with that. If you want your Kraken to last longer, use Special Power Up.

That's all I have to say about those two Chargers for now. Hopefully you can learn something based on what I said, and let me know if you'd want to see more of these! If you want, suggest a weapon and I'll try and give my advice in either another post similar to this, or I'll just answer directly.

Also, if any people who actually main these weapons want to give advice, you should probably listen to them instead. They would understand the weapon a lot more than I do.

Until next time!

#splatoon #splatoon 3 #text post #long post #tips & tricks: splatoon edition #splat charger #E-liter 4K

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hunting-season · 2 years

Note

hello, hope you're having a good day/night <3

could i request older sibling! mc coming to nrc to visit their little brother w/ the heartslabyul gang? i just want to see them get doted on, it'd be so softttt

sorry if this req was confusing! ty in advance

hope you're having a good day/night too anon!! it's a little confusing, but i think i got what you mean? if this isn't it, just shoot an ask!! if it is, well, still feel free to shoot an ask just to chat www :] using the dorm leader/experimental style...maybe it's just a fic-like style lol

Older Sibling!MC visiting MC's little brother + Heartslabyul

It's been a while since you've seen your little brother. Separated by miles of land and sea with your brother at what is basically boarding school, you've been feeling an itch to baby someone again. And your brother never comes home on the weekends, citing it's too much work. Brat! Oh well, you'll finally be seeing him soon thanks to NRC having a "family day" festival, so now's your chance to baby him and meet his friends (and baby them, too).

Deuce Spade is so polite, you jokingly apologize to him for any pranks your brother has pulled on him. Which seems to have been many times! Shame on your brother for bullying such a cute boy!

(Not too much shame though. You're weak to your brother after all.)

Riddle Rosehearts and Trey Clover are also polite--they both offer you tarts! You've heard your brother rave about the sweets at Heartslabyul, so you're wondering if you should try them...

You also think Riddle is super cute! He gets really red when you say that, and it almost makes you want to coo and feed him sweets. It makes you think Riddle is the reason Heartslabyul has so many good sweets (and you're partially right!).

Cater Diamond reminds me of so many people around you. It's not a totally bad thing either! You think he's really cool!

Ace Trappola, you can see from miles away, is pure concentrated trouble. He responds to your teases well and has the most mischievous smirk. He's so cute and noogie-able!

Your brother says the last two already have older siblings, so you can knock off your older sibling schtick, but nothing is going to stop you.

You tell Cater and Ace to consider their selves under your care now, and they both respond appropriately by groaning. It's not your fault they're so cute though!

You really are here to spend some time with your brother though, and leave the Heartslabyul boys to their own devices and families. However, you and your brother do bump into the others as the day passes!

You two are joined by Ace and his older brother for a bit. Ace is describing you to his brother as "the person who wants to steal your cute little brother"

You and Ace's brother laugh in sync, two older siblings too used to having a spoiled younger sibling (and being the one to spoil them. sometimes)

As Ace and his brother depart after a four-way chat between siblings, you noogie Ace hard. He shrieks something about suffering under two "nasty old people's knuckles diggin' into his skull." Serves him right!

Deuce finds you two first! He's mainly here to introduce your brother to his mother, but you get your own short intro too!

Mama Spade is so nice. She offers to show you and your brother baby pictures of Deuce, who vehemently disagrees with that until you bring up possibly seeing your brother's ugly baby photos as compensation.

Deuce and your brother squabble until you and Mama Spade (lovingly) scold and separate them. You send Deuce off with a strong hair ruffle.

Your brother shushes you loudly from calling out to Riddle, but the dorm leader spots you anyway. He seems nervous to separate from his mother...?

When Riddle gets to you, he still seems nervous, but much happier now that he chats with your brother and you.

You two don't keep him for very long, but you leave him with a head pat! He blushes bright red at your action as he excuses himself.

Trey and Cater are together with Trey's family. Cater's couldn't make it, it seems.

You leave your brother to talk with his friends as you entertain the younger Clovers and their parents. Aren't young kids such handfuls? (Not like you could say too much though!)

You invite yourselves into the boys' conversation till Trey and Cater are eventually called out to by Mr. Clover.

You trap those two in hugs! Trey laughs good-naturedly and Cater makes a noise like a whine and oof-sound combined. They both squeeze/pat you back as you let go.

Your brother whines a bit after on how you "totally embarrassed him" by being "gross" with his friends. You claim he's jealous and tell him he'll always be your favorite little brother anyway.

Somewhere in the future, 6 boys are fighting for your older sibling-ly affections.

#this is pretty long #im sorry for being a heartslabyul liker #dormouse escapes #twst #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland & reader #twisted wonderland x reader #riddle rosehearts #ace trappola #deuce spade #trey clover #cater diamond

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xpeachesncream · 3 years

Text

lowkey | teaser

⦿ boo’d up in the daytime

⦿ mackin’ & hangin’ in the nighttime

↳ SERIES RELEASE DATE: ~end of may / beg of june

summary: in order to pass organic chemistry and pay off your car damages from an accident, all you have to do is help the nerd, jeon jungkook, with a few things: pretend to be his girlfriend and teach him the ways of dating.

pairing: popular!reader x nerd!jjk

genre: college au, fake dating au, friends (with benefits?) to lovers au | fluff, angst, smut

words: 1.2k

warnings: the tracks/mixes included in the party playlist can get really explicit so please do not listen if it makes you uncomfortable - i apologize in advance; otherwise, not much with this teaser besides alcohol consumption, intoxication and some grinding? oc and sunmi are getting kook and his boys frat party ready!!

tags: @taegularities @jimidol @miinoongi @bluesharksandfish @ggukkieland @unicornbabylover @thebeebi @preciouschimine @ladyartemesia @moonchild1 @jikookiekosmos @marcoazz2 @kootaes @wearenot7withu @codeinebelle

"Wait, fuck. Are you sure we're gonna be okay?" Hoseok watches you and Sunmi pour the shots with a slight scrunch, Taehyung covering his nose at the smell of the vodka.

"Yes." You laughed. "You'll be okay. You just have to pace yourselves."

"Fuck that, go all out." Sunmi giggles, making you shoot her a look.

"Sunmi, no! They haven't drank like that before!" You pass them their red cups. You watch as Jungkook and Jimin make faces when they look inside the cup, Taehyung damn near gags at the smell up close and Hoseok gives his cup a little shake.

"Soooo, we can't take this in two sips or something?"

"Absolutely illegal to babysit." Sunmi smiles, obviously having the time of her life right now.

"Babysit?" Jimin repeats.

"Yeah, like taking your sweet time to finish a drink or shot."

"Ah, babysitting." Jimin says, even though he has never heard of the term before besides actually babysitting [like a child or something].

"Ready?" They all nod, making you smile. "Cheers, guys!" You and Sunmi take the shot with ease, while the four are struggling in their own ways.

Jungkook making the most sour face you have ever seen someone do.

Jimin tilting his head back against their couch, eyes closed and definitely in pain.

Taehyung gagging even more that his nose is turning red?

Hoseok is yelling at the burning sensation crawling down his chest.

"You guys okay?" Sunmi cracks up. "Another?"

"Girl, did I not just say the point of this was to pace yourself?!"

"We're in their living room, Y/N. What could possibly go wrong?"

"Pour another." Jungkook says, making Sunmi nod excitedly, in approval.

"See, your boyfriend is down. Let's do it. Besides, when it comes to Delta Chi's shit, they can get a little crazy."

"Fine, but none of you are moving. You're staying right here in this apartment." You say, pouring another shot into their cups. After this, you were gonna call it quits with the drinking, absolutely 100%. Solely because you were worried for the boys and how it was their first time drinking so intensely. And so after that shot, you place your cup on the table, ready to put your foot down—

By pouring another shot, and another, until their faces were almost painted red and they're starting to stumble all over the place.

"Oh shiiiit, the world no longer feels flat." Taehyung says drunkily, burping in the process.

"Okay!" Jimin says, sloppily standing and pointing a finger. "Dance time!"

"Look, the thing with dancing is that you need to keep it chill. Don't make it look like you're trying too hard to vibe to whatever song is playing." You agree with Sunmi silently as you sit on the couch, in between Jungkook and Jimin’s spot. Sunmi watches as Hoseok gets a little aggressive with whatever the hell he's doing with his arms right now and she stands, shaking her head. "No, no." She puts his arms down. "Less tense, just go with the flow." She begins to dance to the music, Hoseok, Jimin and Taehyung following along. "Yeah, like that!" You get up to join them with Jungkook, but they start doing their own thing, breaking off into robot-pop-like dance moves, making the both of you laugh. You all continue to dance along until a more seductive song comes on. The only person to take notice really is Jungkook and he steps back a bit, unsure of how to handle this. Do this. He was hoping none of the guys would bring it up—

"Wait, how do we dance with girls?" Taehyung says, doing some hip movements with his hands in front of him as if imagining a pretty lady dancing in front of him. "Cause I really wanna try and dance with someone at least once."

"Not.. like that. Please." Sunmi lowers his hands. "You definitely won't get that one time if that's how you come off." You're still bouncing a little on your feet, making Sunmi nod at you. "Jungkook, go grab your girl." He swallows the lump in his throat, doe eyes wider than wide. "Come on, don't be shy. I'm sure you two are planning to do much worse, if you haven’t already." Right, he thinks. He always has to remind himself that Sunmi has no idea you two are faking this. He's surprised, honestly, that his friends haven't slipped, especially being this tipsy.

"Oh, uh—okay." He scratches his head and looks at you, as if he was calling for your help through his eyes.

"Just come up behind me and put your hands on my hips. Bring me close to you." And Jungkook does what he's told, coming up behind you and gently placing his hands on your hips. He digs his fingers into them, bring you close as you work your hips against his.

"See, that was pretty good. Just keep it natural, always look at the girl and read her body language, her look, if she's willing. Don't be a fucking creep about it."

"Oh, Jungkookie! You look like a natural!" Hoseok calls out, making him step away from you to sit back down on the couch. Session over, at least for Jungkook. But fuck, he could feel himself getting hard beneath his jeans and he didn't know what the fuck to do. He wants to keep you close, dance on you, have fun with you. But he definitely didn't want his hard-on getting in the way and fucking scaring you off.

God.

Though, the unexpected happens after everyone starts dancing around again and having fun to the music. You look at him behind you, sitting silently on the couch while he watches everyone and welcome yourself onto his lap.

"Oh fuck?" He says, questioningly. Now what!? His hands are up in the air because he isn't sure if this is a mistake or if you're really willing to sit on his lap right now.

"Kook." You say, pretty tipsy yourself. "Hold onto me." You say lowly.

"Right." He says, kicking himself into boyfriend mode. You keep your eyes on him until he rests his hands on your thighs. "That okay?" You nod, but there's a look on your face that he can't necessarily read and you're fucking thriving off of it. He was cute as your fake boyfriend, and you weren't gonna lie, you loved seeing him squirm under you like this. You start to grind your hips onto him, rolling them against his crotch nicely, slowly.

"Oh my god, Jungkookie's living a dream. He's getting a lapdance from his girlfriend." Taehyung watches, making Jimin drunkily cheer him on.

Surprisingly, Jungkook grips you tighter, pressing himself tightly against you to feel all the friction. He follows your movements, the pace and fuck, is he loving every minute of it. It could be because of the alcohol, but whatever it was, he was with it. You, ontop of him, in these shorts— nice, fat ass just working him like they do in the music videos.

You were a fucking dream.

The song stops and goes back to a more upbeat song, making you stop and laugh at the vibe change. Jungkook feels the heat rising in his cheeks, biting onto his bottom lip to prevent himself from smiling too big at you.

"You pick up quick, Kook. Are you sure you don't dance and sing?" He chuckles.

"Positive." As you're about to make your way off of his lap, he holds onto your hips and presses you back down. You turn to look, seeing him shaking his head at you before leaning his head forward near your arm. "Where are you going? Can't you just sit with me for a bit?" You bite your lip and nod your head, getting yourself comfortable on his lap.

"For practice?" You tease.

"Thought you didn't need me to say that anymore." He fires back, causing heat to rise in your own cheeks due to this sudden sexual tension you’re feeling. You blame it on the alcohol. However, it doesn’t change the fact that he learns quick. For damn sure.

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skycollides · 3 years

Note

i live for billy russo jealousy, very very angst 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

Sorry to you anon I didn’t see the jealousy I somehow only read the angst part.

I’ll write you a new one

Also, today I had an idea, I don’t know if you could do a billy one where the reader is killed by Rawlins, I think that would be really interesting to see 😭 (probably I’ll end crying but yeah) 😭🤍 I combined these two requests I hope you enjoy it!

Not Your Fault

Billy Russo x Reader Authors note: I apologize in advance for grammar mistakes English isn’t my native language. Let me know if you want to be tagged. Requests are open. Feel free to send them in. Warning: mentions of death, guns, shooting, kidnapping, violence, heartbreak, swearing, no happy end - Get some tissues you're gonna need them!!

Words: 2.300

Billy decided to come home earlier today since it was your day off and he wanted to spend the day with you.

He takes out his phone to let you know that he will be home earlier than usual, when he sees a text from you.

Hey Babe,

I’m gonna meet up with y/bf/n for

a coffee to catch up.

Do you want me to bring you

a coffee or something else?

Let me know!

I love you

He reads the text and smiles. Since he met you he finally understood what Frank meant back then when he said quality over quantity. He never felt more loved or taken care of since you’ve been together.

He tries to call you but it goes to voicemail after a while.

’’Hey darling I’m leaving Anvil now. I see you at home. I love you Y/n.’’ with that said the hangs up drives home to your shared apartment.

About 30 minutes later he arrives at home. As soon as he enters the living room he can’t believe his eyes. Everything is trashed. The furniture is knocked over, the drawers of your cupboard are laying emptied on the floor.

’’Fuck!’’ is the only thing that escapes Billys mouth. He continues to look around and reaches your bedroom and it doesn’t look any better. He heads to your walk-in wardrobe. All of your clothes are spread over the floor.

Billy decides to give you another call to let you know what has happened while the two of you were gone. But again you don’t answer it goes to voicemail again.

’’Hey Y/n it’s me again. Listen … don’t panic but I’m home now and it looks like - well it doesn’t just look like it someone has broken into our home and trashed the whole place. I don’t know yet what has been taken but it would be nice if you’d come home now. Love you.’’

Billy walks through your wardrobe and all of the sudden he sees your engagement ring on the floor which is unusual since you never take it off. He bends down to pick it up and sees not just you ring on the floor but also a little blood. He moves away the clothes that are laying there and under there he finds the gun he gave you for protection.

’’Fuck what the hell has happened here?’’ he asks himself.

He decides to call your befriend to see if she knows when you’ll be coming home.

’’Hey Y/bf/n it’s Billy’’

’’Hey’’

’’Listen is Y/n still with you?’’

’’No I was waiting for her at the coffeeshop but she didn’t show up and didn’t answer any of my texts or calls. Did something happen?’’ he asked anxiously.

’’No I just couldn’t get a hold of her maybe she is asleep. She hasn’t been sleeping well these past few nights maybe her body is catching up now.’’ he says not trying to worry her.

’’Well let me know when you hear from her.’’

’’I will.’’

’’Thanks Billy.’’

’’No Problem. Bye.’’

’’Bye.’’ with that the call ends and Billy is freaking out.

He decides to call Frank.

’’I though I told you the next time I see you I will kill you.’’

’’Did you hurt her?’’

’’What the fuck are you talking about Russo? Hurt who?’’

’’Y/n! Are you the one that hurt her?’’ he asks again.

’’Why the hell would I hurt Y/n. She is the reason you’re still breathing. Billy what is going on?.’’ Frank asks concerned.

’’I can’t get a hold of her. She didn’t meet up with her friend. Someone hurt her. Someone has taken her Frank. She is gone. Our whole place is trashed and there is blood on the floor along with her engagement ring.’’

’’Shit.’’

’’I’m loosing my mind here.’’

’’Not just you.’’

’’Wait let me call you back someones calling.’’ he says and hangs up. More specific its a video call from an unknown caller. Billy accepts and is created with the devil himself. Rawlins.

’’Where is she?’’ Billy asks him angered and he just smiles and says.

’’With me Billy. I thought the lovely Y/n and I should have a chat. Well and I knew I’d get your attention. Since you miserably failed to do as I told you, I thought having Y/n in my power would help you see things more clear.’’

’’I wanna see her.’’ Billy demands.

’’You are in no position to make any demands Russo. I told you to kill Frank Castle. He is still walking around the city. You kill Castle and Y/n can leave its simple as that.’’

’’I wont to shit until I know that she is still alive.’’ Billy replies.

’’Well in that case take a look’’ Rawlins says and turns the camera. There she is. His Y/n, his angel - beaten up and tied to a chair. His eyes are brimming with tears. Billy did everything in his power to protect Y/n. Ever since he met her he tried to keep her away for the danger and the bad things he did. But now he sees that he miserably failed. He failed her. The only person in the world who loved him unconditionally.

’’Your lover is on the phone you wanna say something?’’

’’Billy’’ you say and it only comes out as a whisper, no strength left to talk any louder.

’’It’s gonna be okay Y/n everything is gonna be okay.’’ Billy says and tries to give you some hope but you know as much as he does that the situation you’re in is absolutely hopeless.

’’Enough with that sappy shit. You bring me Frank Castle by the end of the day or she dies. Oh and Billy? Don't take it personal.’’ Rawlins says and hangs up. Billy sinks down to his knees and starts crying. His head shoots up when he hears someone approaching him. He looks up and sees Frank.

’’And?’’ Frank asks.

’’Rawlins’’ is all that Billy says.

’’Why am I not at least a bit surprised?! What does he want?’’

’’You dead by the end of the day or she dies. You should have seen her Frank. Tied to that chair, beaten up and covered in her own blood. I failed her. This is my fault all because I refused to do as he told me.’’ Billy explains.

’’What do you mean?’’ Franks asks.

’’Rawlins called me couple of weeks ago telling me to kill you and I refused. Here we are now. He took her to make sure you end up dead. End of the story’’

’’Why didn’t you?’’

’’Because you’re not the only one who had made a promise to Y/n. She made you promise not to kill me and I had to promise her not to kill you. I’d never go against Y/n and her wishes.’’

’’Looks like we need a plan to get her out of there.’’ Frank says and Billy looks shocked.

’’What don’t look at me like that. You’re not the only one who wants her safe. She means a lot to me and she doesn’t deserve to be involved in the things that followed us home.’’

3 hours later

Billy and Frank came up with a plan to rescue you and with the help of Liebermann they found the shithole where Rawlins keeps you hostage.

With Frank in a Bodybag Billy enters the warehouse.

’’Russo I’ve been waiting for you.’’ Rawlins greets him.

’’I see you brought me a little present.’’ he says with an evil grin.

’’Frank is in here I wanna see Y/n now.’’ Billy says and Rawlins sends one of his men to get you.

He has to carry you in since you don’t have any strength to move. All you feel is this on going pain. He set you on your feet but your legs give in immediately and in less than two seconds you’re laying on the floor. Looking at Billy your Billy. He came for you. You didn’t think he’d make it in time. You seriously thought you’d die before he had the chance to come for you but you were wrong. He is here.

’’Billy!’’ you say and smile softly.

’’I’m here now. Don’t worry Y/n’’ he replies.

’’So now that you’ve seen with your own eyes that I’ve kept my part of the deal. Now it’s your turn show me Castle.’’ he says and walks towards Billy with a gun in his hand.

Billy opens the top of the bag and shows him Franks face including a bullet hole ( which isn’t real but Rawlins doesn’t notice).

’’Well done Russo. We could’ve avoided all of that. next time you listen to me.’’ he says and pats his shoulder. Billy is exploding on the inside but doesn’t show. Billy turns away and walks towards Y/n. He kneels next to her and takes her into his arms. He kisses her head softly.

’’I’m here now my love. It’s gonna be okay. Everything will be fine. I love you!’’ he repeats it pretty much like a mantra.

’’I love you Billy Russo more than you’ll ever know.’’ you whisper. All eyes are on you and Billy so no one notices Frank stepping out of the bodybag hiding behind a post.

’’Go and get Castle we’re gonna burn him here’’ Rawlins says and Billy looks at you with wide eyes.

’’You didn’t?’’ you silently mouth and he sakes his head.

’’Babe you I know you barley have any strength left but you need to get up now and get the hell out of here now. Take that door over there it’s the fastest way to get out of here and hide. Frank and I will take care of the rest.’’ he says fast and you nod. He kisses you one last time before helping you get up.

’’Boss the bag is empty.’’ Rawlins turns around and sees how his guys hold up the empty bag.

’’What is this?’’ Rawlins screams. Frank steps out from behind the post and starts shooting and so does Billy while trying to shield you as much as he could.

Soon after Rawlins and his men were dead. Billy caught a bullet in his arm and Frank was shot in the leg other than that the two of them were fine.

’’Billy.’’ Frank says with a worried expression, his face white a sheet. Billy turns around and sees you laying on the floor not moving. He drops his gun and runs towards you.

’’Y/n, Baby can you hear me?’’ he asks panicking. You open your eyes and look at him.

’’Billy my back hurts.’’ you whine. Billy looks over your shoulder and notices the huge red spot. You were shot.

’’I’m so cold Billy and tired so so tired.’’

’’Don't close your eyes daring. Please I beg you stay with me.’’ he pleads crying.

’’I love you William Russo. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me. Never forget that do you hear me.’’

’’Don’t talk like that my love.’’

’’You and I both know that I’m not gonna make it out of here and that’s okay. I’m not mad at you and I don’t blame you for it Billy. Rawlins is the only one to blame for this you hear me? My biggest fear was to die alone in this shit hole not being able to see you. I could be worse at least now I’m in the arms of the love of my life. Listen to me now Billy. You’re allowed to suffer and to mourn me but life goes on and I don’t want you to be miserable for the rest of your life. Don't you ever dare to feel guilty for being happy again after I’m gone. I’ll be watching over you and I’ll always be with you in here.’’ you say crying and place your hand on his chest right over his heart.

’’Frank!’’ you all for him. Once he reaches you, you grab his hand and start talking.

’’Thank you for being here. Thank you for putting everything aside for me. I means everything to me. I couldn’t ask for a better friend. Please watch out for Billy. He will need you and Curtis.’’ you say and he nods.

’’Anything for you.’’ he says and lets go of your hand to give you and Billy some privacy.

Billy holds you for a few more minutes and kisses you from time to time. He also tells you how much he loves you.

’’It’s time Billy.’’ you say as it becomes harder to breath.

’’I’m not ready Y/n. I ’’ he says and his voice breaks.

’’Neither am I but we have no choice.’’

’’Don’t forget me.’’

’’How could I forget the love of my life? You’re my everything. There’s a reason why I put that ring on your finger. I love you Y/n Y/l/n.’’

’’I love you too William Russo’’

Those where the last words that left your mouth before you left Billy and the world on a rainy Thursday night.

All Billy’s been doing since you’ve left ist staring at your pictures and watching videos of the two of you while drinking until he passes out.

Now two weeks later there is a small funeral held for you. Only Billy and your closest friends are there including Frank Karen and Curtis who did everything in their power to keep Billy and line.

Once the funeral is over everyone is gone except for Billy, Frank and Curtis. They spent the rest of the day passing around a bottle of whiskey remembering the happy times and tell each other funny things they’ve experienced with you over the years.

Taglist:

@justatiredfool

@ainhoabarnes

@artemisausten

#billy russo #billy russo x reader #ben barnes #ben barnes character #marvel the punisher

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mocacheezy · 3 years

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Things that made watching Transformers (2007) easier and even enjoyable:

[note: B'verse gets the treatment that it gets by fandom for good reasons. There are tons of posts that dissect the bullshit of these movies far better than my second-language-english-non-american self could ever tackle, so I am not doing that, or plan on doing that. But if I decide that I'll get through every continuity of the franchise I will find a way to make it fun for myself. And so, this is my search for golden nuggets in these movies, because they did bring in new fans to the franchise and that's why we have other continuities that we might not have otherwise. Credit where it's due, and some positivity for those that did find B'verse at least amusing if nothing else. ]

🍴��🔪🍴🥄🔪🍴🥄🔪🍴🥄🔪🥄🔪🍴🥄🔪

Frenzy

Anytime Frenzy was on screen made me smile because his movements and personality were hilarious, he is just so expressive despite looking like someone super glued a bunch of knifes together. I wouldn't know it was Frenzy if I didn't go to the Wiki, but no matter that, he was funny and that's what matters.

The original Cybertronian robot modes

We don't see them for long, but the glimpses were glorious. Just look at Optimus

Gorgeous. What I wouldn't give to see the details up close. Maybe I'll go looking eventually, but this is just so nice.

We also get a "sexily rises from the pool" scene with Ironhide (probably unintentional and I am biased due to being a robofucker. In any case, very very nice and Cybertronians look so good as aliens)

"Excuse me, are you the Tooth Fairy?"

You see this kid?

This little girl was the only human I cared about in the movie until I saw just how badass Mikaela is, and how cool the military dude is. I don't like kids, but I would lay down my life for this girl.

This one scene just makes me think of what would happen if her parents showed up way earlier. Ironhide would be her guardian and it would be both adorable and hilarious because "Honey, you have to drive in a sentient alien that looks just like our car because the goverment men said so or there will be consequences and potential alien threats."

There are so many joke potentials there; the cultural barrier, the "I am the ine that is supposed to keep her safe" glaring contests, there is just so much shenanigans that could happen.

Also, tea party with the kid. Tea party with the kid.

Sam Witwicky actually reacts like an average human would when faced with the situations he finds himself in

Do I like Sam Witwicky? No, he is the kind of character that I would want to punch irl because of his personality and actions. He is disgusting. But watching him scamper and scream and stutter when faced with giant metal robot aliens that can squish him like a bug? Good, that was a beliavable reaction and I enjoyed it a great deal.

Megatron. Just, ✨Megatron✨

(the best screenshot of the few I could take while watching, no, I am not going back for a better one, he looks perfect like this)

I also laughted at how they kept him frozen like a popsicle. And not even well, like, they COULD'VE made an actual freezer and pop him in instead of using those couple of tubes just so he was displayed for all personell to gawk at. HE CRASHED IN THE ANTARCTIC!

The design looks so good, because it looks ALIEN and POINTY and AGH!!! The colors? There are no colors that would make him stand out, he looks like someone opened a cutlery drawer, mixed up what's inside, threw in some extra knifes for a good measure and then shook the whole thing until this guy materialized from the pile. It is both incredibly annoying and satisfying.

🔪

Mr. Welker did an amazing job with his voice, I don't know what the directions were, but oh man it sure sent shivers down my spine. That is the kind of voice that spells "You are going to die" and I already have my coffin picked out.

EDIT: SO APPARENTLY! IT WAS NOT WELKER THAT VOICED MEGATRON.

It was Hugo Weaving, and yes the man did am amazing job, but I apologize a million times, I was CERTAIN that THE OG VA OF MEGATRON WOULD ALSO HAVE VOICED MEGATRON. LIKE, OKAY BAY, OKAY!

🔪

LOOK AT THE AMOUNT OF ICE! With how quick he came back fully online once Frenzy turned off the freeze liquid tubes, I bet he was half awake through the whole thing. Systems just below idling or something, in any case, AGENTS YOU ARE SO DUMB! WHO WAS GIVING SUBPAR FUNDING TO THEM, THEY BETTER BE FIRED!

I also was glad that Sam refused to call him by the name the sector asigned to him, despite Megatron being in stasis. And that he insisted they use the correct name. Good job Sam, acknowledge the threat by the actual name and show respect to a fellow sentient lifeform. Even though said lifeform is hellbent on destruction of the universe and your world.

ALSO, AND I CANNOT STRESS THE LAUGHTER AND AMUSEMENT HERE; the sheer DISRESPECT! They don't disassemble Megatron's corpse. No, these idiots, these absolute morons decide to dump him into the ocean, letting him sink to the lowest possible point (not sure if they did say it was the M' Trench or not), where there are proper freezing temperatures - good! You're learning, good job!! - just... In full. Full corpse. What's left of him. Just blup! Down with the fishies he goes!

I understand that they probably didn't know how to approach Optimus about it, but... At least behead the guy. He came back ONCE, who is to say he won't come back again?! Safety precautions my dears.

They also completely disregard what a giant extraterrestrial metal alien rusting away on the bottom of the ocean could do to the ecosystem at large. Like, I find this incredibly amusing, because this ISN'T something most folks think about when watching a movie but we have giant squids down there. We have so much weird things down there, the ocean isn't even fully explored AND YOU WANT TO CHUCK AN ALIEN CORPSE DOWN THERE?!

Now the real question: is he a looker? *looks at the pictures* hmmmm, depends on if you like knifes. Like, really like knifes. Like really, really REALLY want to get it on with a fine assembly of kitchen knifes that were exposed to the elements but somehow haven't rusted away completely.

I think he's neat.

Needs a good long powerwash though. Preferrably with something to help the whole "I was frozen for more than 50 years and sprang back to action as soon as I woke up" thing that happened.

My man needs to take a moment and get his bearings, like dude. Please. You can conquer the world after some energon and slow system boot-up period. The strain on the systems my dude, you ain't young.

Also love that this "death" was probably reused in TFP because lord golly, do we love our faves ending up under the sea. (Though Megan took a much bigger fall, Bayverse WAS PLOPPED INTO THE WATER LIKE A NEWLY ACQUIRED FISH I CAN'T YOU GUYS I CAN'T!)

In short: I love the comedy of american military giving such disrespect to an Alien Warlord. These guys are really sealing their fate.

I loved the way they got the Witwicky family to be important to the plot

The whole "selling my great great grandpa's glasses on e-bay" thing gives us a very good self insert/OC/rewrite/movie AU potential. Don't like Sam and his disgustingness? Find a way to write a cousin or some far off relative or hell, even just someone who buys the glasses off e-bay and go wild with it!

Archibald was also clearly an inspiration for Isaac Sumdac as far as I can tell, what with both of them using Megatron as a means of helping technology advance.

Only difference being one of them lived and actually talked to Megatron after he came back online and the other got driven to madness and death due to the amount of information beamed into his brain. Isaac also acquired a space baby daughter, so the guy is absolutely luckier of the two.

Mikaela being fucking competent and badass throughout the movie, and not being just fanservice eyecandy

I could do without the fanservice, but her personality? I loved it. I loved that she wasn't crawling to Sam and wasn't being "hard to get". Which is also why I was very displeased at the very sudden "oh yeah, romance! She returns his feelings after he took her for a ride and let her vent her frustrations!". The movie is 2 hours long and they could throw in some moments where these two connect?

Welp, it is an action movie, boy gets girl no matter what, can't complain about the staple in the genre.

However, Mikaela x Optimus? Now THAT is something I considered as soon as the two locked eyes and interacted. Like, even taking my shipping goggles off, these two could have a very interesting dynamic and Mikaela could be a very good protagonist. I wonder what the movie would be like with her as the lead and Sam being the fucking moron she has to drag along with her.

BUT ALSO! Can we talk about the horrible, excruciating fact that her and Bumblebee drove around with Bee's damaged legs dragging over asphalt all the time he was shooting at 'Cons? There were sparks flying! SHE WAS DRIVING BACKWARDS! She took command of the situation and did what she could because Bee still wanted TO FIGHT!

Also, they way she beat up Frenzy? Gorgeous, I want to slap Sam's non-existent balls off for not atleast saying "thanks". The dude would be sliced thinner than cabbage if she wasn't there.

The millitary man we are supposed to care about because his wife gave birth while he was on duty and we see his baby three times in the whole movie, actually being a pretty awesome and well-written character

Look, personally, I was a little confused at the reason why we were seeing his wife and baby interacting/the scene where she thinks her husband is dead. Mostly because I don't like kids, so scenes like that, when I don't even know who the character is, have no impact at all. Him having a baby isn't going to make me like the guy more, unless I know his character. Him being absent because he's on duty doesn't mean he'll be a good dad (though he looks like the kind of man that will try his best, and I like that in a man). So seeing his wife and kid at the start of the movie seemed pointless to me.

BUT! FOCUSING ON THE POSITIVES HERE!

Lennox is a good character and whenever he was on screen I was invested in what is going to happen to him. He's the kind of action movie lead that would have me invested, despite my meh interest in mainly gun fight oriented action movies.

Essentially, loved the guy, would love to see more of him while also being able to tell what's happening on screen. Also the comedy scenes he was in were usually funny.

Okay so these are the things I like about the first movie! It was very long, had to watch it on 2,5x speed because it simultainously dragged while ALSO giving me too much information, but the moments like these and the way my imagination latched onto characters I liked made it watchable. It isn't a movie I'd use to introduce someone to the TF franchise, but it provided me with lots of material for my imagination to run wild.

#moca watches #transformers #transformers bayverse #moca screeches #Yes the cutlery divider is due to the Decepticons looking like they do. It amuses me greatly.

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criminalminds4days · 3 years

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Family Matters | Chapter 7: Happy Birthday

Hello people!!

I know I just came back, but school and work are really kicking my butt. I have virtual events, classes, projects and papers... On top of that I have to go to work and I barely have enough time to sleep. I am hoping I'll be able to keep writing, and I already have some chapter written in advance but who knows how my life will be by the time we reach the end of those chapters...

Anyway, I hope you guys are having a good week and a good year so far. Enjoy the chapter and let me know what you think!

P.S. keep in mind I did not have time to proof read this, so it might be wonky.

Warnings: Swearing, sexual references, violence and murder references, public embarrassment, and very bad jokes!

Word Count: 5.2k

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Tag list: @mcntsee @lets-be-gay-for-the-angel @evelyncade @haylaansmi @paulaern @myfandomlife-blog

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(This gif is not mine)

Chapter 7: Happy Birthday

It was now time to get everything set up for Reid's surprise birthday party. She was still not talking to him, but something within her didn't allow her to abandon the idea of celebrating his day of birth. She wanted so bad to stop wanting to be his friend and talk to him, be around him and hear him laugh, but she just couldn't bring herself to do it.

"You're gonna let us know your decision soon?" She almost fell down the chair she was on.

"Can you not scare me to death, please?"

"Well stop keeping us in suspense."

"Emily," she stepped down from the chair and used it to sit. "I didn't accept the position, in fact, I told Luke that same day. To help him with his bosses being on his ass I said I would think about it, but I'm going to email them soon to say I won't be transferring. I don't know how Garcia found out but she didn't let me explain that I wasn't even leaving. Then all of you barged in and I just thought it would be funny to let you guys believe I was gonna leave."

"And you've had us in suspense for two days?! Do you know how devastated Reid is? He probably thinks that's why you won't speak to him!"

"That's not the reason I don't talk to him, I ignore him because he's a cheater!" Her mouth closed fast after saying those words.

"What do you mean? Did he cheat at poker or something?"

"No, just forget about it."

"Tell me!"

"No necesitas saber," She said in Spanish. Telling Emily she didn't need to know.

"¿Se te olvida a caso que también hablo español?"

"Yes, I totally forgot you spoke Spanish." She placed for a little bit, deciding whether to tell her or not. "I saw Reid and JJ a couple of weeks ago and they were in a very friendly situation, to say the least."

"Were they making out or something?" She shook her head, and Emily smiled. "Listen, I honestly don't think that they have something going on."

"You didn't see what I did."

"That's true, but I am also not emotionally involved."

"I'm not emotionally involved."

"Sure you aren't." She winked, "does Hotch know you're staying?"

"He was there when I turned down the offer originally."

"That little prick, he's mentioned nothing to me!"

"To you? Interesting." Before Emily could correct herself she had already made her way to the sitting area, setting all the dishes and cups. She looked it over one more time before deciding it was good. "I have to change, I will be back in a half-hour. Everybody should be arriving by then, do you mind just checking that everything is good while I'm gone?"

"Yeah, though it seems rather interesting that you're having a birthday party for a 'cheater' don't you think?"

"It's also weird that you expected Hotch to tell you specifically, rather than the team, things like my possible transfer."

"That's not what I meant."

"Oh, but it is."

"No, it's not!"

"Yes, it is, now bye!" With those last words, she exited the building.

She paced her room. She had about thirty minutes before Spencer arrived and she was about ten minutes away, so she still had some time to figure out what she was going to say or do once the party began. She knew someone would tell him it was she who organized the party, and that would only raise more questions about her current behavior towards him.

"I had already planned it, and I couldn't get a reimbursement for the salon." She said to the mirror. "No, that might be too mean. How about, Whatever else is going on, I am glad you're alive. No, that's too nice." She rubbed her eyes, frustrated with her responses, and then, the best idea she would come up with came to her and she couldn't pass up the opportunity.

Would it backfire? Most likely, but that didn't mean she wasn't gonna try her best for it to not. With one final look at the mirror, she grabbed her keys and made her way to the venue. When she arrived all the cars from her co-workers were parked, except for JJ's, who out of the goodness of her heart had offered to drive the birthday boy. She wouldn't be surprised if Will didn't attend the event, because that would give them some alone time. Absorbed by this thought she almost didn't notice that almost immediately after she exited her car, JJ, Spencer and Will pulled up in their car. When she noticed them she squealed and ducked, but it had been a little too loud, as all three of them turned to her and saw as she very awkwardly tried to hide by ducking next to her car. She sighed and stood up, waving at the trio.

"Dropped a contact." She weakly explained.

"You don't use contracts, nor glasses for that matter." Spencer reminded her.

"No, but my friend does, and she left them in my car, and when I got out, I ended up dropping one."

"Well, it might be time to go in," JJ said, trying to salvage the surprise.

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming?" Spencer asked her.

"I... I didn't know I was, it was sort of a last-minute thing."

"Oh, okay." He looked at her expectantly, as if hoping she would acknowledge the date and congratulate him. That was one of the few things that contrasted his serious demeanor, those small moments in which he would just act like a child and have that twinkle in his eyes.

"Anyway, why don't I go ahead and go inside and you guys catch up later."

"No, you can stay with us. I mean, you can be my date. Today doesn't feel like the day to be the third wheel." He gave her another expectant look, hoping she would ask what made today special, or simply acknowledge she knew what day it was. "Besides, we haven't really seen much of each other lately."

"Yeah, life's crazy. Let me take a rain check on that though. I'll see you all later!" She tried to walk inside but he took her arm, preventing her from leaving.

"Are you mad at me?"

"No, she's just trying to prevent you from finding out about your surprise birthday party before we get a chance to say surprise." Spoke the one and only Derek Morgan. They turned to find all of their friends at the entrance with amused smiles on their faces.

"Surprise!" They exclaimed and his eyes lit up even more, if that was possible, at the sight.

"Can you let me go now, please?" He nodded and mumbled an apology as he let go of her arm, she moved next to Emily and avoided all eye contact with everybody.

"Way to go champ, you almost ruined it." The woman jokingly whispered in her ear.

"Happy birthday Spencer!" Everybody said.

"Thank you guys, this means so much to me. I can't believe you all took the time to plan this."

"Actually, it was all-"

"Emily! This was all Emily's idea." She exclaimed before JJ could finish the sentence.

"Well, thank you so much, Emily." He said to her. She couldn't help but notice a small hint of disappointment in his tone, but she decided to not read too much into it.

"Yeah, you're welcome." This one said, shooting a glance at her friend. "How about we go inside and get some food?" Everybody cheered and they all made their way to the table that she had set up earlier.

"So my idea, huh?" She mumbled.

"Shut up Emily, you don't need to read into everything."

"I'm not reading into stuff, it's all just out in the open."

"Whatever."

The dinner had gone great, everyone seemed to be having a great time, especially the birthday boy, though something kept bugging him and she wasn't sure what it was.

"So, have you made a decision about your transfer?" He directly asked her once the conversation had died down.

"Are you asking me?"

"Is anyone else considering a transfer?"

"Touche." She instinctively looked at Emily and Hotch, who casually were sitting next to each other, 'out in the open' she immediately thought. Emily gave her a pointed look while her boss simply nodded slightly. "I'm still thinking. Luke made some really interesting points about the position."

"For example, his deep voice." Emily teased.

"A raise in salary." She countered.

"How do you even know Agent Alvez? I heard of him, but I didn't even know what he looked like before this week." Garcia questioned.

"He was a mentor, per se, when I was finishing up my courses at the academy. I ended up going on my first mission as a graduate with him and his team, I was actually going to start with them when Hotch requested me for the BAU."

Everybody seemed a little impressed by this knowledge. It was true she never really shared her stories, and it was mostly because they were filled with embarrassment, but this was work-related, so it seemed okay.

There seemed to be more questions emerging but before they could be asked, footsteps were heard at the entrance, and soon enough, Anna, Tyler, her aunt Becky (Anna's mother), and her mom walked in.

"Who in the-"

"Happy birthday to my favorite son-in-law!" Her mother cheered and before he even had a chance to stand up he was already engulfed into a hug.

"Son-in-law? Reid, is there something we need to know?" Questioned Derek.

"What are you guys doing here?" She spoke, feeling her throat dry out.

"Well, your mom told us it was Spencer's birthday and that you organized a birthday dinner for him, so we thought we would stop by and congratulate him," Anna said.

"Wait, that's your mom?!" Garcia asked.

"Is there something you two need to share with the rest of us?" This time the question came from Hotch.

She turned to the uninvited guests and gave them the fakest smile to ever exist. "Family, can I have a word with you all, outside? Now."

"Aren't you gonna introduce us to your team?" Her cousin asked, a smile playing on her lips.

"Yes, of course." She turned to Emily, begging with her eyes for help.

"Aaron, do you mind coming with me to my car. I seemed to have left something there."

"Right now?"

"Yes right now. It's important." She basically dragged him out of the venue, and she took a deep breath.

"Well, Mother, Anna, Tyler, and Aunt Becky," she signaled to the uninvited attendees. "This is my team, Penelope Garcia, SSA Morgan, SSA Jareau, and her husband detective Will, SSA Rossi, and you already know Dr. Reid. Team, this is my family."

"Pardon me if I sound rude by pointing this out, but you seem familiar," Derek mentioned.

"Well duh, we're one of the wealthiest families out there. The Blackwood family is very well known, and we've had our fair share of magazine covers." Anna said with glee.

"Blackwood? Wait, that's your last name, but you go by-"

"ANYWAY!" She interrupted JJ, "let us congratulate the birthday boy and celebrate, let's worry about titles later!" She grabbed her mother away from Spencer and placed her and the rest of her family in additional chairs that were part of the venue.

"So, how old are you turning Spencer?" Tyler asked, with a hint of annoyance.

"Thirty." The mentioned responded. Both of them stared at each other and she couldn't decide if what was happening between them was pure hatred or sexual tension.

"I thought you didn't like older men that much."

"It is of wise people to change their mind." She responded.

"I honestly feel like I am missing so much information right now," Derek said out loud.

"Same." JJ and Penelope added.

"I think I have a somewhat good idea of what's happening," Rossi said.

"Well, as a gift from me and my daughter, here are the keys to the Noire museum downtown. I personally think it would be fantastic for your children to grow up going there every weekend or something."

"Mother!" She exclaimed.

"Thank you, but I can't accept that, it is too much." Spencer intervened.

"Nonsense. You are the only son-in-law I will ever have; let my daughter and I spoil you."

"Yes Reid, let your future mother and future wife spoil you," Rossi spoke, a hint of glee in his eyes.

"Have you proposed already?!"

"No!" They both exclaimed. She had no idea how much more of this she could take.

"Okay, let me get this straight, Reid and you have been dating, and you didn't tell any of us?! How long has this been going on?"

"Well-"

"One year, and about four months, right cousin?" Anna was asking to get murdered.

"Actually, it's one year five months, and six days since we met, but we've only been together for one year three months and 4 days. Unless I confused my numbers again." He gave her a look and she fought the urge to not smile. Sure, she had to pretend they were a couple, but she was still mad at him.

"Reid getting his numbers wrong?" Will whispered.

"Yeah, because of his dyslexia," Tyler said as if it was obvious.

"Of course, his dyslexia! How could we forget Will?" JJ added. She looked completely surprised and kept glancing back between Spencer and her, but her tone was controlled, making sure the non-profilers in the room would not see through her. She couldn't help but wonder if the blonde was at all upset by the situation, after all, if she was right JJ was Spencer's girlfriend. The reminder made her frown, but she soon erased it from her face: one problem at a time.

"Well, this was grand, getting to know each other but I am sure you guys have a long drive and-"

"Don't worry cousin, we made time for the party. After all, Spencer is practically family, and you two are just so perfect for each other."

After her words, the steps of Emily and Hotch made the room go silent. He gave her a knowing look and took his previous seat as well as her friend who gave her a wink. This was going to be a disaster.

"So cousin, you guys hadn't told anybody about your relationship? Why keep it a secret?"

"The FBI has very strict policies, and both agents needed to demonstrate that their work in the field would not be affected by their relationship, and it hasn't," Aaron said, giving her a faint nod.

"Wait, but what does that mean for your transfer?" Garcia asked. Her eyes opened in shock because nothing could ever go right.

"What transfer?" Her aunt Becky questioned.

"I got offered a position with the team I did my first case with. But that's really not gonna change my relationship with Spencer. It's not like I'm leaving the country if I accept it. If anything I would spend more time in D.C."

"Interesting."

"Listen, family, I really appreciated having you here and taking the time to come and congratulate Spencer, I'm sure he's so happy that you guys could be here, but it's getting late and since all of us have to be back in the office tomorrow morning we're probably gonna call it a night soon."

"Of course darling." Her mother winked at her and Spencer as if suggesting that was not the reason the two wanted people gone.

"Before we leave though, we would love to get a picture of the two of you. It's not every day you get to celebrate your partner's birthday number thirty." The annoying blonde she had for a cousin suggested.

"Maybe another time."

"No, I think that's a great idea." Morgan chipped.

"Sure, why not?" Spencer said casually.

Was this man crazy? Did he not understand that their boss was right there and this could cost them their careers?!

She sighed and approached the brunette she placed her arms around his torso as he enveloped her in a hug, they smiled for the camera and waited a few seconds for pictures to be taken.

"Now Kiss!" Anna said and followed by that Garcia and Morgan joined her in a chorus of "kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss." The rest of the team, except for Hotch joined in, and she made sure to remember to kill Emily at her next best opportunity.

She cursed internally and turned her face, meeting his eyes for the first time in days. Sure, they had made accidental eye contact from time to time in the last few days, but she had tried her hardest to make it rare, and now she felt somewhat vulnerable. He gave her a small nod and leaned in, his lips touching hers ever so softly. It had been over two months since they had last kissed, but she could remember the taste as if it was yesterday.

A couple of minutes and cheers later they broke apart, his hand immediately reaching for hers. She tried not to wince or remove it, but it seemed like an impossible challenge.

"So cute!" The woman said, disgust in her voice. "Anyway, happy birthday Spence, here are some books that we thought you might like." She placed them on the table and attempted to walk towards him and hug him, but both she and Spencer made it clear that was not an option. There was something about her spanking him during the retreat that didn't really sit well with either of them. "You two are just made for each other, aren't you?" She commented before walking back towards her husband.

"Happy birthday Spencer, I hope the next time we see each other it's to ask me about an engagement ring." Her mother squeezed his cheeks and planted a kiss on each one to later repeat the process on her daughter. Aunt Becky simply waved and Tyler gave the couple a head nod before the four left the building.

There was a silence, she let go of his hand rather abruptly and separated herself from him a couple of inches as the rest of the team observed them. "Should I go set up the karaoke machine?" She asked as she tried to navigate the room.

"You should tell us why none of us knew the two of you were a thing," Morgan said.

"Agreed." The rest of the team said.

"Really, Emily you too?"

"That kiss made me doubt."

"Let me just make sure they're gone." She walked towards the entrance, as her mother's vehicle drove away she sighed with relief and made her way back to the table. "All right, let us get this over with."

"Why didn't you tell us you two were dating?" Penelope asked.

"Because we're not." She responded.

"Really? Then what was all that?" Morgan arched an eyebrow, clearly not impressed by her response.

"I asked Dr. Reid to pretend to be my boyfriend for a family event because my cousin kept telling me she was better than me and I was gonna end up alone because I was horrible and-" everybody observed her, the message clear. "Okay, she didn't say that exactly but the intention was clear! Anyway, because he went with me now my family thinks we're a couple and we have to pretend we are."

"That can't be it, please tell me you're lying and you two are actually in love," Penelope begged.

"Sorry, but Dr. Reid and I are simply co-workers who got caught in a big lie because of my big mouth." She shrugged, "Hotch, I promise, you have nothing to worry about."

"I know." He said, but something in his tone suggested otherwise.

"But that kiss though. It seemed more real than it should." JJ pointed out.

She looked at her, wanting to say something to hint that she knew about her and Spencer and that she knew that comment was coming from a place of jealousy, but she decided against it. She simply rolled her eyes, as if disregarding said kiss and made her way to the karaoke machine.

After everyone had moved on from the conversation and had begun cheering at those who participated by singing one or two songs, she decided to take a little break and get some air.

“If I didn’t know any better I would say you hate me or something.”

“I don’t hate you.”

“Then what is it, because ignoring me and barely answering me isn’t cutting it anymore. I thought we were friends.”

“JJ, there are just some things that I can’t condone.”

“Like what?”

“Cheating.”

“I didn’t cheat, I was the first one to the office, so I grabbed the first doughnut. I am sorry if you liked chocolate glazed ones.”

“I am not talking about that! Though I am a little upset about that too!”

“Then what did I do?”

“Are you sleeping with Spencer?”

After those words came out of her mouth and JJ processed them, the blonde couldn’t help but laugh her ass off. She observed as the woman continued to laugh without a sign of stopping soon. “Me, and Spencer?” she asked between laughs, “Have you seen this?” She pointed at the ring in her hand and began to draw images with her hands as if hoping to represent that she was married, and she and Spencer were nothing but friends, she even confessed to her second pregnancy, something only Spencer knew about. But the other woman didn’t really understand, she thought everything was signaling at her avoiding to answer. “You are a funny one! Now, let’s go back inside, I will buy you a whole box of glazed doughnuts on Monday.” She managed to say as she continued to laugh, “me and Spencer? Hilarious!”

After watching her enter the venue, she waited before following suit. The whole scene seemed bizarre at best. Her confrontation had backfired and now she was back to square one on that front. On the bright side, she would be getting her chocolate glazed doughnuts so not everything was lost.

After two more hours, the venue was completely empty. Though they didn't have to go into the office the next day as she had told her mother, they all were more than happy to sleep early when given the opportunity. She had stayed behind to clean up some of the areas, hoping to make it easier for the cleaning crew the next morning.

"Do you need help with that?"

She jumped at the voice. "Jesus! What is it with you people and trying to give me a heart attack?" She said to the brunette.

"Sorry, I just wanted to help."

"Shouldn't you be heading home?"

"That's the thing, JJ and Will got a call from the nanny and they had to go. I was in the restroom, so I didn't know and they, well they left me behind." He looked really embarrassed by the situation.

Don't do it, she told herself. Don't say the words that you're thinking, she urged. "I can give you a ride home." She said despite her best efforts.

"Thank you."

"Yeah, no problem."

She turned back to her duty and the silence that engulfed them was so awkward she almost backed out from giving him a ride home.

"What did I do?"

"Excuse me?"

"I'm a profiler, you know? And I'd like to think I'm good at my job. I know you're mad at me, I just wish I knew why."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Please, I can't keep going on like this. I miss you, I miss spending time together, joking around, and just being us. I really miss it and I will do anything so we can go back to being friends."

"Dr. Reid, six months ago we weren't even friends." She pointed out.

"But four days ago we were."

"Are you sleeping with JJ?" She blurted out before she processed the words.

His face went from confusion to amusement and soon he was laughing his ass off. Great, now both of them had laughed at her.

"Me and JJ? You do know she's married, right?" He said between laughs.

"Not everyone that gets married is faithful."

"You're mad at me because you thought JJ was cheating on Will with me? Why would you even think that?"

"I saw you two at the office the other day."

"JJ asked me to be the godfather of her second child. She's pregnant. And no, it's not mine." His smile grew wider as the laughter stopped as if knowing she thought he was cheating was the best news he could receive.

"Oh." She mumbled, everything making sense. JJ’s reaction, the whole signing, and laughing. The idea seemed so foreign to both of them she couldn’t help but feel like an idiot for thinking it to be a possibility. She wanted to hide under a rock and never come out again. How could she possibly think that the two of them would do such a thing? Now that she had all the pieces the idea seemed so far-fetched she couldn't even understand what led her down that path. "I-I'm sorry, I interpreted everything wrong."

"I'm glad you did though." He said, placing his hand on her shoulder. "It gave me a really important insight."

"About what?"

"I need to tell you something." He said, and his other hand moved a strand of hair behind her ear. She couldn't help but think this was all too similar to a movie and how horrible that was, and yet how much she wished she was part of a movie in that precise moment. A part of her already knew where this was going and she felt all bubbly inside at the notion. "I like you."

"I like you too Spencer. You're my best friend." She spoke, completely shattering her internalized movie.

"No, I like you romantically. If it was up to me that kiss would have not been as short nor as innocent as it was."

"Why are you being a dumbass?" She said as she pushed his hands off her shoulders. "Quit playing, let's get you home."

He shook his head, slightly annoyed by how dense she was. "Will you please stop for a minute? I am trying to tell you about my feelings for you because I have been hiding them for days and every time I see you I want to kiss you and hold your hand. When I saw Luke and you, first I thought he was kind of hot, but then I saw him as a threat, and I was dying to punch him in the face. Because I want to be more than your best friend. I've probably wanted to be more than your friend for a really long time, but it took Emily barging into my hotel room and scaring Derek into the cafeteria for me to realize it and now I know that you must feel something for me, otherwise why on earth would you get so upset about the idea of JJ and I having an affair? So, can you please put the pieces together and come here so we can make out in the middle of a salon on my birthday like I dreamt last night?"

"You're joking, right?" She said, her heartbeat speeding up, half of her body wanting to run and the other half wanting to do exactly what Spencer had suggested. Well, it was more of an eighty percent for staying and twenty percent for running.

"Do I look like I'm joking?"

"You actually like me?"

"Yes! And I'm pretty sure you like me."

"I mean, sure, you're funny and a great friend. Not to mention cute, well I guess we have to be honest here, you're hot, like really hot, but just because I see that doesn't mean I like you, does it?"

"Do you want to kiss me right now?"

"Yes! Wait, no! I mean yes! I-"

"Let me help you out a little with that." Before she could ask how Spencer had already shortened the distance between them, placing his lips on her. This was the first time they had kissed without an audience, or as a part of their fake relationship. To prove how real this was, Spencer didn't hold back. First, his hands were on her cheeks, but they slowly moved to her hair, hips, and pretty much anywhere he could find. Hers never left his hair, appreciating how soft it actually was and the fact that despite his immense love of his hair and that he despised people touching it, not once had he complained.

She thought back on her conversations with Emily, on how Reid always made her feel safe. Sitting on a couch with her head resting on his shoulder had felt so right, and the idea of losing him to JJ had made her spiral. She knew that Will's feelings were not going to be the only ones hurt if it had been true. She wanted him.

She liked him.

It was so ridiculously obvious that she had to laugh. One would think metaphorically, but since she can't ever have a good moment without ruining it, her body decided to actually laugh, interrupting what had become a heated make-out session. As she tried to stop her laughter, he looked at her, confused.

"That bad?"

"What?" She said between laughter, "no! It's not that, it's just that I am so dumb. How did I not see that I like you so fucking much?" She continued, her laugh subsiding. "Spencer Reid, will you be my real boyfriend?"

"This has to be the best birthday present ever." He smiled, “but I don’t know if I am convinced by this offer."

"How about I second it by offering a make-out session in my car, and instead of driving you to your apartment, you can stay with me tonight?"

"Yes, please!"

“Is that a deal then?”

“How could I ever say no to you.”

After what seemed like a lifetime, but also a blink of an eye, they had made their way to her apartment. His shirt was wrinkled, and both their lips were read as can be. The small hickeys that he had graciously given her were now on full display as her neck was left exposed. She opened the door and he stepped inside after her, making sure to close and lock the entrance.

“Before we go any further, I need to ask.”

“No, Spencer, I am not a virgin.” She responded with a smile.

“That’s not what I was going to ask.” She observed him, encouraging him to continue. “Are you seriously thinking of leaving the BAU to go work with that jerk?”

“First off, he’s not a jerk. You don’t need to be jealous; Luke and I are just friends. And secondly, I turned down the offer as soon as he presented it to me. I was just giving you all a hard time.”

He frowned, clearly not as amused by that knowledge as she was. “There is something you should know.”

“What is it?” Her smile faded as his expression turned to a serious and concerned one.

“I sleep on the right side of the bed.”

“But you said-“

“I know what I said, I simply didn’t want you to feel bad, so I took the left side.”

“Spencer…” They almost fell as she crashed her lips to his. For others, this simple gesture might seem like nothing but knowing he would do something just to accommodate her was somehow so amazing and heartwarming. This knowledge summed by her newfound feelings were giving her the urge to pull him to her bedroom right then and there, but sadly for her, there were still certain things that needed to be addressed. “Before I undress you, and trust me I am dying to do that, I need to request something from you.”

“Anything.”

“Stop wearing tight pants to work.”

“Excuse me?”

“You have a very nice ass, I have noticed. And recently you have decided to use dress pants that don’t let me forget about this knowledge. We need to keep our relationship secret, at least for the time being, and watching you in those pants is not gonna help me, at all.”

“On one condition.”

“Yes?”

“You need to stop wearing blue.”

“But it’s my favorite color!”

“I know, and you look really good in it, like really good. It’s not good for me.” He planted a soft kiss on her neck, and that alone would have made her agreed to pretty much anything he asked.

“Okay, yes.”

“Good, now can we please get to business.”

“Never call us having sex business again.”

“Noted, as long as this isn’t the only time we have sex.”

“As if.”

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer x y/n #spencer reid x reader #Criminal Minds #CM #fanfic

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alwaysahiccupandastrid · 4 years

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May I ask why you're so against rachel bilson? It's just that I know absolutely nothing about her and from and outsider persepctive she seems like a regularly nice person

Hi, yes! I apologize in advance, this is super long I’m afraid!

So first of all, I want to make it VERY clear that I don’t endorse sending hate to people, even if you despise them, and I am not intending to spam any social media she may have with hate because that’s simply inexcusable.

So here’s the thing: the whole thing just personally leaves a bad taste in my mouth because they had a sex scene years ago in a film that was directed by Bill’s ex-wife, Maggie Carey. It just really weirds me out because that was several years ago, and obviously I don’t know Maggie beyond the fact she’s a director and was married to Bill, but if I were her I’d be more than a little pissed off because I’d be wondering if my husband had been seeing this woman the entire time. I don’t think Bill is the type but I frankly don’t know him personally and who knows? It just seems a little tasteless in a way, but hey whatever.

Firstly, in literally every photo I’ve seen of them together - grocery shopping, golden globes etc, - they both look like they’d rather be anywhere else. Especially tonight, you can see in videos when they turn away from the cameras, their smiles vanish and they look (for lack of a better description) kind of constipated. I know Bill has bad anxiety so that could be part of the reason, I don’t know. But it looks like they’re not even trying - he smiled much more genuinely when with his ex. You can tell when someone is half assing their smile and when it’s genuine, especially in their eyes or the way they’re smiling.

I’ve been having a twitter conversation with someone, they messaged me wanting to talk about the whole thing, and I’ve been discussing it with them for a few days now. Disclaimer here that I already knew this person because I spoke to them about a month or so ago because their friend met PJ at a comic con and she (the twitter girl) was talking about it, so we already knew of each other before this whole ordeal. Recently, however, they’ve been telling me stuff and showing me tweets/photos/stuff about R*chel and, hey, maybe I’m only seeing what they want me to see? Who knows? I’m not saying my impression that I have of her is the correct one, just my own personal impression thus far.

The first thing we noticed was the sheer amount of paparazzi photos and news stories. I have never seen someone be photographed so damn often while out shopping - so far in the last week alone, RB has been papped near enough every day. No one gets papped that often by accident. The person I spoke with on twitter informed me that it’s always the same people (backgrid) and that she’s probably calling them herself. Not even the kids from Stranger Things/Harry Potter get photographed this much, and they are WAY more famous and in demand than her*. This week alone it’s been grocery shopping (w/ Bill), then going out to lunch with her friends, then shopping for furnishings, and THEN lunch with her mother. All in the same week. This isn’t just a her thing, it’s in general, but no one cares if actors are shopping for shit or going out to lunch with their mothers, it’s really not exciting or interesting. So yeah, there seems to be some question as to whether or not she’s phoning the paparazzi herself.

*I had literally never heard of her before being a fan of Bill so... 🤷🏼‍♀️ She’s definitely not as famous as the ST kids are right now

Also, it’s interesting that in the eleven years he was married to Maggie, and in even the last few years where he’s really started to pick up career wise, he has hardly been photographed by paparazzi in public. The only time I can think of is when he was filming IT Chapter 2 and that was because it’s a major film and they were shooting outside in costume. There could be more but I doubt there’s loads going around. So yeah, I find it kinda questionable that only now is he getting papped this regularly.

Not only do I think calling the paparazzi on yourself is vain and straight up thirsty for attention, but if that IS the case (and I’m not saying it is), it’s incredibly disgusting to do that whilst out with someone who has REALLY bad panic attacks and social anxiety. You can see it in his face that he’s pissed off and annoyed about it.

This person I spoke with also made some remarks regarding both of their kids with other people. Apparently the only time RB ever goes out with her kid is to get them photographed with her or something, and that she’s literally never with her daughter. This could be bullshit for all I know. I haven’t really researched her daughter because, frankly, that would be creepy and I also don’t really care about her enough to give a shit.

We know that Bill has 3 daughters, and it just strikes me as odd that he made a big fuss about how he only saw them 5 days in summer of 2018 (due to Barry and IT filming) and how he was crying over it, and “I’m going to spend more time with my kids 😭” but then...you get a girlfriend instead? And you spend time with them instead? And even when I first read the interview where he said about missing his kids, like...dude, come on. That’s your own fault, no one is making you stay away from the kids, you and your wife have joint custody. In comparison also to RB, who’s kid is seemingly papped quite a bit with her, I’ve literally seen maybe two or three occasions where one of Bill’s kids have been papped, like that’s it. And that’s how it should be frankly.

Back to the person I spoke with, they have a friend in Tulsa who was there around the time the two were spotted at Starbucks together, and here’s apparently the tea: Bill apparently got coffee alone quite a few times, she arrived in Tulsa, they got coffee, and then she left Tulsa after like a day. This person’s friend said that they weren’t holding hands, and they barely even looked at each other the whole time. This is a kind of “her friend’s brother’s wife’s cousin” thing and could be false, however. And I honestly think that if you’ve got 3 kids and you make a HUGE fuss over not getting to see them because of YOUR work schedule, then you should be spending Christmas with them and NOT with your new side chick. The same goes for RB - if she was in Tulsa over Christmas, why was she not with her own kid?

There’s a whole kettle of accusations that could or could not be true about both of them frankly; she’s using him to restart her career, he’s insecure and he’s being taken advantage of, she’ll probably get his kids papped, blah blah blah. This honestly could be total bullshit so who the fuck knows at this point. The whole getting together before awards season as well is so obvious, like so many couples do that for good publicity during this time of year and it’s frankly laughable. It’s the same kind of situation as the Alison Sudol/David Harbour situation two years ago - they stepped out together at the Golden Globes etc. And look how that turned out!

And, to be honest, I get feelings about people. You know how sometimes you just get a feeling about someone and you try to push it aside but it gnaws at you? Yeah. It’s not concrete evidence but I’ll be honest, 97% of the time I’ve found that if I have a feeling about a person, I’m at least somewhat right. I had a gut feeling when the whole nonsense about Johnny Depp and Amber Heard started, and even when I was abused and harassed over it, I knew my gut was telling me that it was BS because it just didn’t feel right. And it turns out I was right in that case because it’s now come out that Heard was abusing him and that she’s almost certainly been lying the entire time about being abused. But I digress, I’m not here to talk about that. I don’t know why but I get a bad feeling/vibe about RB and, hey, I could be totally wrong, nothing is ever 100%! But right now that’s the vibe I get and i tend to go with what that gut feeling is telling me.

And before the accusations of “you’re just a bitter jealous fan” come flooding in (as they inevitably will), I can promise you that is not the case. I make jokes about being thirsty and shit, but that’s all they are - jokes. Come on, I’m 22 next week, do you really think I want to hook up with a 41 year old with 3 kids?? 😂 And besides that, there have been MANY actors I either crush on or admire who are either in relationships or married, and because I’m an adult I can respect that. Hell, most of the time, I start stanning their partner too! There’s literally only ever been one occasion where I had a crush on an actor and didn’t like the person they’re (now) married to, and that’s because I didn’t like her as a person. I can respect that they’re married and I wish them all the luck, but given that it’s been nearly 9 years now and I still don’t particularly like her (and I don’t crush on said actor now), it’s definitely not a “fangirl crush” thing. It’s just that sometimes you don’t like certain people - maybe you disagree with their views, their behavior, or maybe you just don’t like the vibe they give off. You can’t like everyone, and you can’t be liked by everyone, that’s just how it is.

So, to conclude, I want to just make it clear that while I’m not a fan, honestly all the power to them, like Bill is a grown ass man, he can do whatever he wants with his life for all I care, he doesn’t need fangirls online rushing to defend him or baby him. As Mrs Brown from Mrs Brown’s Boys said... “it’s your life, love, you’re entitled to fuck it up however you please”. (I’m not saying he IS fucking up his life, on the contrary he’s doing very well for himself, it’s just a saying)

#its nearly 5am and i drank too much im going to bed #asks

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aresaphrodites · 7 years

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Hello! If You're still taking requests can you write a fic where Bughead consummate their relationship but then they get a call that Fred has been shot. Betty wears Jughead's sweater and jeans and they rush to the hospital. Archie, in his despair, says some horrible things to Betty and he and and Jughead get into an altercation. You can end it anyway you like. Thank you in advance, darling! 😘

Of course! :) I’m always taking prompts, my dear.

I’ve never written a smutty scene before so I hope this wasn’t *too* terrible. Fair warning, there’s a bit of slut shaming in here. Tsssssk.

I hope you enjooooooy.

It’s not like the movies. They didn’t talk about it beforehand and make a plan. There aren’t any candles lit or rose petals on the bed. It’s nothing incredibly spectacular, but it’s still perfect because it’s them. It’s them just how they’re supposed to be. Simple. She doesn’t need candles and roses, she just needs Jughead.

“Put your hands above your head.”

Betty listens to him. How could she not? With them like this, he’s in charge. He’s in charge and he knows it. Jughead grabs onto her wrists, tight but not enough to hurt, as he continues to roll his hips into her. He feels good, he feels amazing, and Betty can’t stop the load moan that escapes her.

“You feel so good, Betts, fuck.” He’s panting into her ear and the action plus his words make her shiver. He’s going slow, and despite that this is their first time together and it’s supposed to be all slow and cute, Betty doesn’t want that. It’s not them. They’re not soft and cute, they’re fast, passionate, and intense. That’s what she wants. It’s what she needs.

“Harder, Juggie. Please.”

“You want me to fuck you harder?” He teases as he nips her earlobe with his teeth.

“Yes,” she gasps out, bucking her hips into his.

“Beg.”

The words shock her and under any other circumstances she might have been embarrassed, but not here, not now, especially not with him.

“Please, please, fuck me harder. Please Juggie,” she’s rambling and she knows it, but she’s seconds away from not being able to form coherent sentences.

“As you wish.”

She doesn’t even have time to think before he’s thrusting into her with a force so hard that her eyes nearly roll back. She lets out a long, loud moan and she’s thankful that they’re all alone in the trailer. Jughead doesn’t ease up once, he just keeps thrusting into her roughly and it isn’t long before they’re both coming, moaning each other’s names out as they press their lips together for a kiss that’s both dirty and sensual.

They stay there like that for a while before Jughead finally pulls out of her and takes off the condom to dispose of it in the trashcan. Once he’s done he lays back down besides Betty and gathers her up into his arms.

“I love you,” he whispers into the dark as he runs his fingers through her hair.

“I’m glad my first time was with you,” is what Betty replies with. “It was perfect.”

A loud shrill ringing erupts around them before Jughead can say anything else and they both jump up at the sudden noise. It takes a few seconds for them to realize that it’s just Jughead’s phone. He picks it up from the bedside table and answers it.

“Hello?”

There’s someone taking rapidly on the other line and Betty watches as Jughead’s eyes widen.

“We’re on our way.”

He hangs up and immediately gets up from the bed while Betty looks at him in confusion.

“Jughead, what’s wrong?”

“That was Archie. Fred’s been shot. We need to get to the hospital now.”

Betty’s entire body goes numb and she doesn’t even think before she stands up and throws on the first items of clothing she sees. A cold fear goes through her at the idea of losing Fred Andrews’. He’s been in her life just as long as her own father has and losing him would be like losing her dad. She knows Jughead feels the same way.

“Oh, my god,” she sobs. Jughead just takes ahold of her hand silently as he leads her out of the trailer and over to his motorcycle that he’d just gotten.

The hospital is quiet and slow unlike usual. This means that it’s not hard to find Archie in the waiting room and as soon as they do, they run over to him.

“Oh, Archie!” Betty cries as she throws her arms around him. “Is he okay? Have you heard anything?”

“I don’t know, they just took him into surgery.” He squeezes her back and places his face into her neck.

Betty pulls away and is about to ask him if there’s anything he needs, when Archie looks her up and down, his somber face morphing into one of disgust.

“Are you seriously wearing his clothes right now?”

Betty looks at him in confusion but then she glances down at her clothes and sees that she is in fact wearing Jughead’s gray sweater with a pair of his jeans that, now that she thinks about it, are a little too big on her.

“I—,” she starts off, but Archie cuts her off with a glare.

“Oh, that’s nice. While my father was out getting shot at, you were out having sex with my best friend.”

“Archie,” Betty pleads, trying to get him to calm down.

“So what? You’re sleeping with him now? You just hop from guy to guy, don’t you? And you wonder why I didn’t want you. If you’re going to be a slut, you might want to be a little more discreet about it.”

Betty flinches back as if Archie slapped her. The words cut through her as tears fall from her eyes.

“Archie, what the hell!” Jughead snaps as he pushes Archie away from Betty. “Don’t talk to her like that! What the hell is wrong with you?”

“My dad was just shot!” Archie yells back. “You two were out having the time of your lives while I was here all alone and while my dad was being wheeled out for surgery!”

“That’s not her fault, Archie! She’s here for you, man. We’re here for you, why are you attacking her?”

“She shows up to the hospital wearing your clothes like she just has to parade around that she had sex with you!” Archie focuses his attention back to Betty. “What if someone sees you? You don’t care that the whole town is going to know that you’re a whore now?”

Jughead lunges forward and shoves Archie with all his force. Archie goes flying back into the wall behind him and Jughead kneels down next to him, grabbing Archie’s shirt in his fist.

“I swear to God, Archie, do not make me do something that we’re both going to regret. Either shut the fuck up and apologize or we’ll leave.”

Archie just glares at Jughead. Although once he turns to Betty and sees the state she’s in, his eyes soften and he looks at the ground in shame. Jughead removes his hand from Archie’s shirt and lets him stand up.

“I’m sorry,” Archie says to both of them. Betty bites her lip, trying to hold back her tears. “I didn’t mean it, it’s just… I don’t know how to react to all of this.”

“This?” Jughead questions.

“You two being together. It’s different. It’s something I never saw coming and it’s going to take some getting used to. I guess just having you guys run here in and exploit it right in my face like that just took me off guard and then with the shooting and everything… it kind of piled up and I handled it really terribly.”

“You did,” Betty agrees with a sniffle. “You’re an asshole.”

“I know,” Archie sighs. He moves forward to reach for her, but Jughead cuts him off, not trusting him to get near his girlfriend. “I won’t hurt her.”

“I know, but you also don’t get to touch her after that.”

“Jughead and I are together, Arch,” Betty cuts in. “You have to learn how to accept that. I love him. I want you to be happy for me.”

“I am. I’m happy for you, I swear, I just…” Archie walks over to a chair in the room and sits down. “I just don’t like change.”

“None of us do,” Betty says as her and Jughead sit down next to him. “But this is a good change so please, just be here for me like I want to be here for you right now.” She gives Archie a tiny smile and he gives her one back.

“Will you guys wait with me?”

“You know we will,” Jughead says.

It doesn’t fix much, hell it doesn’t fix anything at all, but Betty thinks she might understand why Archie flipped out the way he did. A simple apology doesn’t take back his words, but they’re best friends and she knows that they’ll get over this together.

#bughead #bughead fanfiction #bughead request

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