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fox-mulder-gets-pegged · 1 year

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So fucking pleased I found my college textbook which I thought I had foolishly donated.

It's actually a super interesting read, it's called The Last Dance and it's an in depth series of research articles, studies, and stories about death. It touches on a wide variety of topics such as:

-social attitudes towards death throughout history

-how we are socialized regarding death and loss

-various historical and cultural perspectives on death around the world

-the legal systems in place and what happens after certain types of death

-health and hospice care

-end of life decisions and perceptions around life threatening illness

-last rites

-understanding the experience of loss (spousal, sibling, child-parent, suicide, traumatic loss, etc)

It's a really interesting read for anyone who has questions regarding death and loss, either for personal reasons or just to learn more about how society views death and depicts it.

#god i fucking miss being in the funeral industry so much #i really liked learning about the culture we've created around dying #like #we've turned death into pure entertainment #violent and jarring and something stunning but only if its entertaining #or a delicate last breath as one fades away tastefully and beautifully on a distant tv screen #its something inflicted on us by ourside forces instead of a natural conclusion #even the language used to describe death is either needlessly graphic or its altogether avoidant #anyways that's enough of that im just saying that the way we as a society view death and dying #is really such a can of worms

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sovereignsimmer · 7 months

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SS23 Orpheus Notebook: Personalization at its Best! [Simblreen 2023]

Greetings, fellow simmers!

Ever since the release of Discover University, I've been using "MyComputer UoG X19 Athena". While the Athena laptop has its charm with its assortment of stickers, they mainly revolved around universities and soccer—a hobby I don't personally share, neither do my sims. That's when inspiration struck, leading me to create something new and exciting: the SS23 Orpheus Notebook.

The SS23 Orpheus Notebook offers a world of customization with its three base colors (black, grey, and white) and a whopping 25 sets of unique stickers. In total, you'll have access to a stunning array of 78 swatches, allowing your sims to express their individuality through their customized computers. While crafting these swatches, I took great care to include a wide range of hobbies and interests, catering to every sim's preferences. Whether your sim is into music, cooking, plants, pets, science, or art, there's a sticker set that suits them. And for those who embrace the supernatural, fear not—I've ensured there are plenty of options for vampires, werewolves, ghosts, witches, and more.

Preview gif is under the cut!

But that's not all! The Orpheus Notebook comes with an ACTUAL SIMLISH KEYBOARD, adding an authentic touch to your sim's computing experience!

You can locate it under the Electronics / Computers category in build-buy OR simply head to the search box and use keywords like "sovereignsimmer," "laptop," or "notebook." It is very affordable; reliability is not the best but not the worst either. Despite its low-poly design, the textures are high-quality. When you adjust your graphic settings accordingly, you'll be able to appreciate all the intricate details.

UPDATE 2: Fixed tuning, it is now BGC & added live-drag functionality. Please redownload & enjoy!

Download Here

[Patreon, Always Free ♥ But your donations are greatly appreciated!]

PS: I've also made an override for Discover University notebook, upscaled its textures with AI. In case you want it, I'm dropping link here. Xx

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grafixdesigngoodies · 2 years

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How To Create STUNNING Layouts - 5 Tips 😲

#youtube #How To Create STUNNING Layouts #graphic design #education #layout design tips

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holyscolor · 2 months

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CHİCLUMİNA - DEVASA+

Explore Your Unique Aesthetic with Chic Lumina

In the world of fashion, expressing your individuality through different aesthetics has become increasingly popular. Whether you're drawn to the ethereal charm of pastel colors, the edgy vibes of streetwear, or the retro nostalgia of vintage fashion, Chic Lumina is your go-to destination for all things aesthetic.

Aesthetic types vary greatly, catering to diverse tastes and preferences. At Chic Lumina, we celebrate this diversity by curating a wide range of clothing and accessories to suit every aesthetic imaginable. Whether you're into soft and dreamy pastels, bold and vibrant colors, or dark and grungy styles, we have something for everyone.

Egirl fashion has emerged as a prominent aesthetic trend, characterized by its playful mix of cute and edgy elements. From oversized graphic tees and plaid skirts to chunky boots and statement accessories, Chic Lumina offers a stunning array of Egirl outfits to help you perfect your look. Express your inner rebel with our collection of daring yet adorable pieces that capture the essence of Egirl style.

For those seeking to express their unique aesthetic through their wardrobe, Chic Lumina's selection of aesthetic clothes is sure to inspire. Whether you're channeling the romantic vibes of cottagecore, the futuristic allure of cyberpunk, or the minimalist elegance of e-boy/e-girl style, our carefully curated collection has everything you need to bring your vision to life.

At Chic Lumina, we understand that fashion is more than just clothing – it's a form of self-expression and empowerment. That's why we're dedicated to providing you with the latest trends, highest quality products, and exceptional customer service to help you look and feel your best, no matter what your aesthetic may be.

So why wait? Explore our website today and discover a world of aesthetic clothes at Chic Lumina. Let your creativity run wild as you mix and match different aesthetics to create a style that's uniquely yours.

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sunkissedchld · 6 months

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𝐏𝐈𝐂𝐊 𝐀 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐃

𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒏𝒆𝒙𝒕 𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒄 𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒏𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒔 𝒂𝒅𝒅𝒊𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖

the piles go from left to right. therefore, pile one is the photo with the love seat, pile two is the heart shaped-potions room without an entrance, and so on and so forth.

take your time to use your intuition to choose the pile that will best resonate with you. lastly, please don’t be afraid to say if the message resonated or not. it helps me in determining if my interpretations are correct or not, and i appreciate any sort of feedback - even if it’s “bad”.

good luck to you, reader 💘

photos courtesy of @poisonnightmares

WARNING: pile iii has a little 18+ mention, but it's nothing graphic nor is it explained in detail

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈

Shufflemancy:

"Dive Into You" by NCT Dream

"Last Night" by Dani Leigh

"TMT" by Stray Kids

Cards:

The Bachelor, The Rose Ceremony, Nine of Rings (Influencer), The Cocktail Party, Knight of Roses (Frontrunner)

Reading:

Your next romantic partner may like how structured and stable you are as a person. You could be a good leader or have heavy masculine energy; you might even embody the traits of "The Emperor" as a tarot card. They may feel as if you're good at making decisions and as if they can trust you with anything. You may have a way of gaining your next romantic partner's attention very easily - you may have Venusian qualities or placements in your chart. Your own beauty may cause your next romantic partner to feel very stunned; you might even leave them speechless often or make them feel as if they need to "step up their game" when being with you.

I also get the feeling your outlook on love or how you operate when you're in love gives your next romantic partner hope in terms of romance. They may have been apprehensive when approaching relationships beforehand, but being with you makes them think that love can exist or that healthy relationships aren't too far-fetched to ask for. You may be someone who is very into love - maybe you're a daydreamer in that sense or a hopeless romantic, and instead of only dreaming of the type of love you want - you make it happen. This might be something that makes your partner addicted to you because it could feel like an everlasting honeymoon phase or because it makes them open their heart in a way they're not used to.

In short, your next romantic partner may be addicted to you because of the authenticity and passion with which you approach love; you may spark in them an appreciation for romance and healthy relationship expectations.

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐈

Shufflemancy:

"Let Me Love You" by Mario

"I'm Ready" by Nakala

"Twinkle" by Girls' Generation

Cards:

Queen of Flutes (The Caregiver) [Rx], Seven of Mirrors (For the Wrong Reasons) [Rx], Six of Flutes (Butterflies), Ace of Flutes (First Kiss) [Rx], Four of Mirrors (Reassuring Rose)

Reading:

Those who chose this pile may be a little closed off when it comes to romance and love. You might be the type of person who plays hard to get and "doesn't really want to get into relationships", or you feel very jaded because of past relationships. I'm kind of getting the energy of you being a person in distress when it comes to romance. Your next romantic partner will actually like this energy about you! They'll like "the chase" so to speak. They're the type of person that likes engaging with people who are hurt because they like nurturing and healing others. They will find your wounded energy addicting because it makes it easy for them to be the nurturing person they are.

Obviously being aware, some people do like seeking out vulnerable individuals in order to have dominance over them and to create unsafe and unhealthy situations, but that won't be the case for most of you who choose this pile. This person does not have bad intentions; fulfilling this caregiver/healer role is something they just enjoy doing. Your next romantic partner will like being able to change your point of view and show you that a more innocent, maybe even fairytale-like view of love does exist. They're not trying to show you what it's like being in a relationship for the first time, but they are trying to show you what love and relationships can be like going forward - with or without them. They are all about easing your worries.

Overall, your next romantic partner will find your reluctance to love addicting. They will like the idea of having to work hard to make you open up your heart in order to feel more relief when it comes to dating. They find needing to work for your validation and happiness addicting.

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐈𝐈

Shufflemancy:

"Burn" by Andra Day

"You Can't Win" by Michael Jackson

"Too Loud" by G-Eazy (feat. Nef the Pharaoh)

Cards:

Knight of Roses (The Frontrunner), Two of Mirrors (Two on One) [Rx], The Bachelor, The Villain, Three of Mirrors (Red Flags), Eight of Mirrors (In Your Head)

Reading:

Some of the people who chose this pile might also be attracted to pile one; I feel like it'll be very few of you though. This pile feels like the first one in a different font and context. There's a lot of Mirrors energy, so there's a focus on communication and your way of thinking. Your next romantic partner may be addicted to you because you're a very passionate, go-getter who knows when to get confrontational. You could be someone who is a little detached from their emotions, or who knows how to use them to your advantage. You know how to get whatever it is you want - including your next romantic partner.

I'm kind of getting "bad bitch" energy. Your energy and way of living may naturally draw people to you, and your next partner may be someone who falls under your spell. The addicting part of you is very heavy in this reading - more so than the other piles. Your next romantic partner might even find how mean you are to them addicting. This could be in an 18+ way in that they like degradation or having you be dominant; it could also be this person likes how you're able to be mean to others. Going back to what was said before, you may be the type of person who knows when conflict is needed, and you could have no problem arguing with or even fighting people who you deem "deserve it". They really like your assertiveness!

For the most part, your next romantic partner will like your mean and/or abrasive personality. They'll like the way you stand up for yourself, and they could really enjoy it when you show off your dominance.

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐕

Shufflemancy:

"Are you That Somebody" by Aaliyah

"Waiting" by Woodz

"Good Girls" by 5 Seconds of Summer

Cards:

King of Roses (The Executive Producer) [Rx], Eight of Rings (Camera Guy), The Moon, Five of Flutes (I Fucked Up) [Rx]

Reading:

Your next romantic partner finds your cautionary attitude addicting. I'm intuitively reminded of the song, "Wait For It" from Hamilton the Musical. You may be the type of person who comes off a little mysterious; you could be the type of person who is always waiting for "the perfect timing" or find yourself holding back because you want to be sure you're doing everything right. You may like playing it safe and following the expectations that others place on you. I'm also reminded of "Good Girls" by Five Seconds of Summer, although this reading isn't gendered in any way! They like that you are predictable and reliable in a sense.

They may also like that you're always paying attention to your surroundings and people around you. You could be an empath or someone who is just great at picking up on other people's emotions and feelings, whether they show it blatantly or not; you could be very in tune with your intuition. They also adore how you're always able to move on from things and never hold grudges against others or towards yourself. I get the sense your next romantic partner might feel like people treat you like a doormat or a pushover, and they like your willingness to (almost) never get upset about that, but it also kind of irritates them. They could like how they feel they almost need to step up for you in a way. It could be that your next partner is very assertive and quick when doing things in their life, but you're the total opposite in that you can be a little passive and slow about what you do in your life; they like this opposite dynamic!

In general, your next romantic partner will like the "opposites attract" type of dynamic you two will have. They like that you're a little more apprehensive about the choices you make, and they adore your willingness to assume the best of people.

#tarot #oracle #pick a card #PAC #tarotblr #sunkissedchld

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sunkissedchldrecon · 9 months

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𝐏𝐈𝐂𝐊 𝐀 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐃

the piles go from left to right. therefore, pile one is the photo with the love seat, pile two is the heart shaped-potions room without an entrance, and so on and so forth.

WARNING: pile iii has a little 18+ mention, but it's nothing graphic nor is it explained in detail

good luck to you, reader 💘

photos courtesy of @poisonnightmares

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈

Shufflemancy:

"Dive Into You" by NCT Dream

"Last Night" by Dani Leigh

"TMT" by Stray Kids

Cards:

The Bachelor, The Rose Ceremony, Nine of Rings (Influencer), The Cocktail Party, Knight of Roses (Frontrunner)

Reading:

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐈

Shufflemancy:

"Let Me Love You" by Mario

"I'm Ready" by Nakala

"Twinkle" by Girls' Generation

Cards:

Queen of Flutes (The Caregiver) [Rx], Seven of Mirrors (For the Wrong Reasons) [Rx], Six of Flutes (Butterflies), Ace of Flutes (First Kiss) [Rx], Four of Mirrors (Reassuring Rose)

Reading:

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐈𝐈

Shufflemancy:

"Burn" by Andra Day

"You Can't Win" by Michael Jackson

"Too Loud" by G-Eazy (feat. Nef the Pharaoh)

Cards:

Knight of Roses (The Frontrunner), Two of Mirrors (Two on One) [Rx], The Bachelor, The Villain, Three of Mirrors (Red Flags), Eight of Mirrors (In Your Head)

Reading:

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐕

Shufflemancy:

"Are you That Somebody" by Aaliyah

"Waiting" by Woodz

"Good Girls" by 5 Seconds of Summer

Cards:

King of Roses (The Executive Producer) [Rx], Eight of Rings (Camera Guy), The Moon, Five of Flutes (I Fucked Up) [Rx]

Reading:

#tarot #oracle #pick a card #PAC #Spotify #tarotblr

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the-jade-palace · 10 months

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TanTan TEO - English Translation

For this first time in Fin Fin history…. TanTan TEO is playable in English.

Created with the assistance of *Herr Riebmann* of the Fin Fin forums (@waehlscheibe on tumblr)!

Explore the vibrant world of TEO in stunning 3D Rendered Graphics as you experience the wonders of rhythm with Fin Fin.

Download from the Fin Fin on QEMU MEGA folder.

The game can be run on modern windows but a version of Fin Fin on QEMU with it included is also available in the MEGA folder.

Can you overcome these challenges and earn the title of Rhythm Master?

#fin fin #finfin #fin fin on qemu #tantan teo #my projects #fin fin on teo #teo the magic planet #finfin on teo #finfinweek

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x-heesy · 1 year

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L o v E 🎥

@chiaranonino @mathieustern “Once, The great Chinese Emperor Qianlong became fascinated by the art of photography. He was particularly enamored with the intricacies of the cameras and the beautiful images they produced. The Emperor was so taken with photography that he ordered his finest artisans to create a camera made entirely of porcelain.

The artisans worked tirelessly to create a masterpiece that would please the Emperor. They carefully crafted each piece of the camera by hand, using the finest kaolin clay and the most delicate of designs. When the camera was finished, it was a thing of beauty. The blue and white porcelain shimmered in the light, and the intricate designs and details were truly breathtaking.

The Emperor was delighted with the camera, and he immediately ordered his court photographer to use it to take portraits of him and his court. The resulting images were stunning, and the Emperor was so pleased with the camera that he ordered several more to be made for his court photographers. The porcelain cameras became a symbol of the Emperor's love for photography and his admiration for the artisans who had created them.”

Background ℹ️ ThanX @thelifeofrylee

#midjourney #aiart #fable via @ainterestingaf #mathieustern #chiaranonino for my beloved soul @wetwicksdry 🤎

#3D#3dmodel#octane#octanerender#mdcommunity#noface#3dart#surreal#maxon#cinema4d#c4d#artwork#psychedelic#poster#photoshop#illustration#smoker#graphism#graphic#art#digitalart#otoy#3dillustration#3dartist

#Nowplaying memories by waldeck

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cemeteryspider · 2 months

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Ballet on the Bayou ~ Pt. 2

Alastor x Ballerina! Reader

Summary: The rise and the fall of an up and coming ballerina

Trigger Warnings: Graphic injury, bullying, physical pain, hospital setting

Word Count: 1516

Previous | Next

Ballet on the Bayou Masterlist

Practice had left you a tad sore and achy but that went away, as you peeked from the wings into the crowd. The place was practically packed with people. The speakers rang with static and announced the beginning of the show in a moment.

The lights in the crowd dimmed and you ran towards the backstage and allowed a deep breath to escape your lips, and you awaited your queue.

~~~

Earlier that same day...

"Ladies and Gentleman, Alastor signing off for the night but before I go, we have a truly special performance at Louisiana's favorite opera hall tonight, the Orpheum Theater, for a timeless classic. The Magnificent Swan Lake, starring up-and-coming ballerina Y/n L/n"

~~~

Alastor and his mother sat in the very middle of the audience. He hoped to never miss a moment of you. He had already called up a couple of friends and had a special gift sent to your dressing room after the performance.

They sat down before the lights dimmed, and his mother watched in awe as the curtains parted revealing a sparkling moonlit forest scene. Some dancers of the trope glided across the stage with the same grace as the swans they were dressed as.

Alastor looked carefully at every dancer, suddenly angry that he forgot to ask the beauty her part in the show. Then in a moment, the star of the show appeared onstage, and it was you.

You transform the scene and the other dancers gather round to create a captivating ensemble. The ensemble dances with such grace and unity it could be mistaken for a kaleidoscope of shapes.

You begin a graceful solo, dancing to the melancholic orchestra below. With a swift crescendo, the villain of the story jumps in, and Alastor could only assume, with his limited knowledge of the ballet, that turned you into a swan.

~~~

After the first act, you quickly rush into your dressing room to change into your Odile costume. This was the most stunning costume you had ever put on. You hoped that Alastor was in the audience to see it.

"Ah, while it isn't the perfect person to play to a two-faced bitch"

Louise said, barging into your private dressing room. Followed closely by her two friends whose names were never offered to you. You only knew Louise because her Daddy paid a fortune to have her be in the running for the two leads of the ballet. However, when the casting directors saw your performance they immediately put you on for both roles, as was tradition.

Trying to be civil you said, "Louise, it is a pleasure to see you as well".

"Yes well, I just wanted to stop by and tell you to break a leg this weekend" She giggled a little and stalked out of the room. Leaving your brows knitted together in confusion. The show must go on, however, and you finished getting ready for the rest of the show.

It didn't even come to your mind that Louise's jealousy could bubble so close to the surface.

~~~

Once again sitting in his seat after helping his mother to get a drink of water and stretch her legs, he quietly anticipated your return to the stage.

Again the lights dimmed and the curtains parted to reveal you dressed in black immersed in the blue lighting that surrounded you. With an air of mystery, you began your dance. Your legs were a symphony of strength and elegance, that wove a wonderful tapestry across the stage. The fluidity and grace you possessed were mesmerizing as you danced across the stage.

When you looked into the audience he could only hope you saw his awe in the darkness. Your eyes held so much passion yet an air of deceit from the character you portrayed. Every pirouette beckons the audience to come closer and experience the darkness and desire you emanated.

Then you made eye contact with the prince onstage, and your movements somehow became more intoxicating. The tempo quickened and when the music was at its loudest you started a series of dazzling turns that left not a single jaw dropped.

Your final pose was one of power and passion, and you held it as the last notes of the music lingered. The crowd left only a moment between the end of the number and a thunderous applause. Alastor happily joined in.

~~~

After bows, you ran into your dressing room quickly to touch up your makeup before going out and looking for Alastor. On the little vanity in the room was a dozen red roses with a little notecard, From Alastor. Your smile widened infinitely as you rushed out of the dressing room to go find him, forgetting completely about the makeup.

In the foyer, your eyes looked frantically around as other dancers looked to the more wealthy patrons of the opera house for a drink or two. You almost went to join them when you felt a tap on your shoulder.

You were greeted with a wide smile and a hand held out for yours.

"You were just magnificent, mon cherie, just brilliant"

You let out a small embarrassed chuckle, as you turned to face him fully.

Once your hand was held in his, he kissed your knuckles just as he had the night before. A small blush crept up your cheeks and you began asking him all about the show, and his favorite parts of it.

~~~

Alastor did not miss a performance the whole week you were there, his mother sadly did not feel up to going to any more of your lovely performances.

Time after time, there would be a new dozen of red roses in your dressing room after your bows, but never at intermission. You would have to ask him how he was doing that. Each night you became more infatuated with the man coming to your shows.

With every bouquet Alastor sent you, something pulled on his heart strings. He knew you would not be in town forever, and he would need to discuss your plans for the future. He hoped he would be included in them.

However, during the last performance you had in New Orleans, something unexpected happened. One of the swans in the opening scene had stuck her leg out in front of one of your beautiful turns. She had a sly grin on her face as she watched you fall, her friends faces mirrors of her own.

Alastor heard the sickening crack as your ankle bent a way it should never bend. Alastor's eyes widened, and his breath caught in his throat as he witnessed Y/n's fall. The gasp of the crowd drowned in the turmoil of his emotions. A sickening feeling settled in the pit of his stomach, and he couldn't tear his gaze away.

Never in his many years did he think an injury would make him squirm, especially considering his hobby, but this made his insides thrash in his stomach.

You did not make a peep, you just allowed yourself to be gracefully carried off stage by the man who played the prince.

~~~

Once the backstage door closed behind you, you let out the bloodcurdling scream anyone in the hallway had ever heard.

Your foot dangled from your shattered ankle bone and you saw everything you worked so hard for disappear in front of your eyes. Tears rolled freely down your face and Charles set you down in a chair. He gave you a sad look as he ran back to the stage to see if the show would go on.

You knew that it was Louise's foot that caused your fall, and you knew it would be Louise who would go on in your stead. A wave of dizziness washed over you as Alastor came into your line of sight.

Alastor's voice, usually calm and composed, betrayed a hint of urgency as he spoke."Cher, they've already called an ambulance. It's on its way. Darling, I am so sorry" He knelt next to you and put a cold soft drink bottle against your ankle. You flinched slightly, but Alastor put his hand on your leg to keep you still.

"I shouldn't have shown her up, Alastor, otherwise I would still be on that stage, on any stage"

"What do you mean?"

"Louise, she did this, she wanted my part"

Louise was the bitch who tripped you and caused your "accident". He kept that name in mind for later, but now you were his only priority. He saw the wagon-looking car pull up outside. Gently he set the bottle down and hoisted you into his arms.

As you made your way to the ambulance with the help of Alastor you couldn't help but think of what you were leaving behind. The pain in your ankle mirrored the pain in your heart as you were carried outside. How could everything you've worked so hard for be gone before it could even really begin?

You tucked your teary face into his chest, and for some reason, he did not seem to mind it at all.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin charlie #hazbin angel dust #radio demon #alastor hazbin hotel #alastor x reader #littledolly2345 #hazbin #hazbin hotel 2024 #hazbinhotel

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therhythmafterthesummer · 1 year

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Finding Comfort in Autumn (M) ~Changbin

Pairing: Werewolf!Changbin x Werewolf!F.Reader Themes: Supernatural/Fantasy AU | Fluff | Smut | Angst | Slow Burn | Rivals? to Lovers | Roomies to Lovers Warnings: unconventional a/b/o dynamics · mentions of abuse (unrelated to Changbin) · self-loathing · graphic depictions of intercourse (warnings under the cut) · pet names (puppy/pup) Word Count: ~16k | AO3 Summary: Changbin was an alpha. He had always been an alpha, but he had a secret. A secret he had only ever shared with the alpha of his pack, a secret he had kept buried as deep within him as he could, a secret he had decided to ignore, until the presence of that annoying omega coworker of his wouldn’t let him ignore it anymore.

Author’s Note: again, where did all these words come from? anyway, i wanted to explore a different type of a/b/o dynamic, and this is what came out of it, if you’re reading this, hope you enjoy it, and if you did, don’t hesitate to leave your thoughts~ [This story takes place within the It’s Cold Out universe, meaning it’s part of my WereRoomies series].

Due to all the abovementioned warnings, this story is intended for an adult audience only. Minors please do not interact.

Changbin’s WereRoomies Instalments: Finding Comfort in Autumn · Heat · The Love I Always Dreamt Of.

Smut Warnings: oral (F.Rec) · mutual masturbation · protected penetration (piv) [it’s all pretty vanilla, oops]

Disclaimer: the story represented in this work does not represent Stray Kids in any way; anything described in this story and all actions performed by the characters are purely fictional, this was created just for good fun.

Changbin had always known he was an alpha, just as did his parents. He displayed alpha traits since he was very young; he was opinionated, liked to assert dominance among his peers, and got incredibly upset when people touched his toys, so when puberty hit him, and his true scent started to ooze off of him, it was no surprise to anyone that his scent was that of an alpha. His parents were ecstatic as soon as their suspicions were confirmed, immediately gushing on and on about the possibility of their son ever leading a pack.

The moment his alpha status started to be recognised in his teenage years, something had changed in Changbin, and not for the better. He became more aggressive, he’d snap at people over the smallest things, and he’d get himself in physical altercations just out of the pure anger he felt coursing through his veins.

There weren’t that many werewolves in his school, humans obviously didn’t know about their existence, but every werewolf knew of the other, and even though each one tried to keep to themselves or to their own small groups from the same pack, Changbin seeked them. He seeked conflict often, almost as if he was trying to prove something.

If there was another alpha he’d try to fight them, if there were any betas or omegas he’d intimidate them into submission, using his alpha voice or his predator stare. Hell, he would even try to intimidate humans, too. He loved seeing them cower from him, seeing them avert their gaze when he used his predator stare–or at least, he used to think he loved it.

There was always that one person, though. That one person at school that never cowered, that, if anything, stared back at him, defied him. You, a werewolf from a different pack. Changbin could still remember the very first time you stood up to him, he had pushed one of your friends out of the way, rather violently, making them stumble to the ground as he snickered.

You, completely furious, stood right in front of him, pushing on his chest with force. “Stop being a fucking jerk!”

Changbin was stunned for a few seconds, only enough to get a whiff of your scent, a mix of nutmeg and ginger, and, to his absolute shock, the scent of an omega. His stunned expression quickly changed, staring you down as his alpha voice came out even before he could register it. “What the fuck did you just say to me?”

He saw the moment his tone reached your ears, the moment your stare faltered just slightly, but you didn’t avert your eyes, nor did you back out. “I said, stop being a fucking jerk. Are your ears not working? Fuck right off, leave us alone”.

Oh, Changbin was seething, how could an omega dare talk back to him? And stare him right in the eyes as they did at that? He couldn’t help but let out an incredulous, sarcastic laugh. “And what’s the puppy gonna do about it, huh?!”

“This puppy’s gonna tear your balls off your body and make you eat them if you continue to torment us like this”.

Before Changbin could retaliate, before he could even attempt to make you submit, a call of your name finally made you look away from him, turning instead to the man calling for you. Your gaze shifted then, finally recoiling and turning your eyes to the floor as the man came to stand next to you, eyeing Changbin up and down. “Is there a problem here?”

Hyunwoo, another alpha werewolf at school, a handful of years older than Changbin, his confident demeanour coupled with his strong scent startled Changbin, but he answered him regardless, gritting his teeth slightly. “Not at all”.

The man looked around them for a second, and then stepped into Changbin’s space, flooding Changbin’s senses with his alpha scent and staring him down. “Thought so”, taking a hold of Changbin’s upper arm, gripping him tightly, he tugged him closer, enough for Hyunwoo to whisper in his ear. “Don’t you fucking dare come close to my omega, understood?”

Changbin gulped the saliva that had collected in his mouth, eyeing you for a second until he nodded, so Hyunwoo finally let go of his arm without saying another word. He turned to you instead, taking your wrist and tugging you away, and Changbin could’ve sworn he heard him muster a ‘you and I are gonna talk once we’re back at the den…’ as you two left.

Back then, that encounter had left Changbin so shaken, so utterly out of his element he kept to himself the rest of the day. Confused by the entire thing, by the omega that stared back at him, and the alpha that managed to shut him up. But his behaviour didn’t particularly change after that, he decided to move on and pretend it never happened at all.

It wasn’t until a few weeks later, that Changbin finally had his wake up call.

“C’mon, this needs to stop. You can’t keep hurting yourself like this, what the fuck’s gotten into you?” Chris had told him one day as they sat at the nurse’s office in their school. Changbin had gotten himself in a fight with a guy from another class, over what exactly Changbin couldn’t even remember. He could only remember his fist hitting the guy’s jaw and the other hitting back, leaving him with a split lip and a bruised eye.

“What’s gotten into me?” Changbin had lounged at Chris back then, too, grabbing him by the collar of his uniform and pulling him close to him. “I’m an alpha, am I not? This is who I fucking am! This is who I’m supposed to be!”

“This is not who you’re supposed to be!” Chris tugged on Changbin’s wrists, effectively getting his hands off of him so he could push on his chest, removing Changbin from his space. “I’m an alpha, too, remember? This has nothing to do with your fucking designation”.

Chris was a couple of years older than Changbin, and even if they were not in the same year at school, they belonged to the same pack, so they had been friends for a long time. Much like it happened with Changbin, no one was surprised when Chris’ alpha designation presented itself once puberty hit him. However, he had reacted completely differently than Changbin had when he found out.

Chris seemed to always be so sure of himself,so sure of his place in the pack. As if he knew exactly who he was and what he wanted to do, which always puzzled Changbin. How could Chris feel that way, when he was struggling so much?

“Then what the fuck am I supposed to do?!” Changbin had snapped that day, but not in the way he had been snapping at people for the past few months. This time, his words came out as a desperate sob, tears quickly welling in his eyes as he brought his fists to press on his eye sockets, shamefully hiding from his friend. “What the hell am I supposed to do, then?”

Changbin could still remember that day vividly. How Chris had tentatively wrapped his arms around him, holding him as he cried. It was the first time he had shown vulnerability, and he wasn’t sure if it was because of how much his face hurt from where he had been hit, or if it was Chris’ general comforting aura that caused it, but he broke down right there in the nurse’s office.

“I don’t know what to do… I don’t know who I am, this all feels so wrong”, Changbin had admitted back then as he sobbed against Chris’ chest.

“We can… We can figure it out together, but stop hurting yourself like this, and stop hurting others too, please…” Chris had pleaded back then, and it wouldn’t be until much later that Changbin would realise how much those words of Chris’ had impacted him.

Changbin and Chris were both of the same designation, the same status, but somehow Changbin always felt as if he wasn’t even close to Chris’ level. This was something he felt whenever he was close to every other alpha he had ever met, he felt as if he wasn’t ‘alpha enough’, a conclusion he had reached after a long time spent doing a lot of introspection, helping him realise that his anger issues in his teenagehood rooted from just that, that struggle he felt within himself, something he was able to work on as he grew up.

By the time Changbin was close to finishing his last year in High School, he had already realised his wrong-doings, how fucked up everything he had done had been, so he spent his last year going to those he had hurt during his lowest time to deeply apologise for his behaviour, all with the support of Chris and Jisung–an omega werewolf they had met after he transferred schools a couple of years prior.

Some people had accepted Changbin’s apology, some even told him they barely even remembered any encounter they had had with him. But then, there was you. You, the omega from a different pack that somehow always managed to press his buttons in all the wrong ways. You, the omega with the nutmeg and ginger scent, masked almost completely by the earthy scent of that one alpha Hyunwoo. You, the only one in his class that continued to defy him time and time again, to get better scores, better ideas for assignments, the only one that tried to be better than him and say it to his face.

Changbin had to apologise to you, too. That was what Chris and Jisung had told him at least. After all, he did try to intimidate you with his predator stare the first time you properly interacted with one another. However, you had gotten on his nerves so many times throughout your school years in different ways completely unrelated to your… Supernatural condition he almost didn’t reach out to you.

‘Don’t do things in halves, dude. You’ve apologised to everyone else, you must apologise to her, too’, was all Chris told him when Changbin voiced how much he just didn’t want to do it. Eventually, though, he figured Chris was right, so he did approach you one day, just as you were shoving books from your locker into your bag.

“What do you want, Seo Changbin?” You slammed your locker closed and then started to walk away from him, making him sigh in annoyance and follow you.

“I want to–God, would you stop walking and look at me?”

You stopped, and looked him right in the eyes. “Why? So you can use your predator stare on me?”

Changbin held your gaze for a few seconds, but then he dropped to look at your nose instead. “I wanted to… To apologise for… For trying to intimidate you all those years ago”.

You were clearly taken aback by the sudden apology, holding your bag a bit tighter. “Okay…?”

“Yeah, so… It was wrong of me to use my status like that, I shouldn’t have and I’m deeply sorry. I’ve learnt my lesson”, Changbin bent at the waist, regarding you with a short bow before he straightened himself again, turning his eyes back up to look at your face.

You were quiet for a moment, just looking at him, your mouth opening and closing a few times until you finally shook your head a bit, clearing your throat. “Apology accepted”.

Oddly enough, Changbin did feel relieved, almost as if the weight of his actions had finally lifted off of his shoulders.

“What I won’t forgive you for is copying my final project’s topic, though”, you added as you continued to walk, which made him scowl.

“I didn’t fucking copy your topic. If anything, you copied me!”

To which you simply scoffed and turned around the corner, finally leaving his sight.

You had accepted his apology back then, but your bickering didn’t stop. If anything, it kept up until the very last day of school, until you both graduated and moved on with your lives. Regardless, Changbin couldn’t undo what he had done, but he had finally owned up to it, and at the very least he did learn his lesson, something his friends commended him for.

As Changbin continued to mature and to work on himself, he finally came to another realisation. Everyone had been able to notice Changbin’s alpha traits when he was growing up, they were painfully obvious, so his other traits, those that he only displayed on occasion, or that he would unconsciously hide from other people, went unnoticed for years. Changbin was incredibly sensitive, he was, essentially, a softie. Something that didn’t usually comply with the image expected of an alpha. He had no real desire to lead a pack, or to lead in general.

Which is why, when Chris decided to start a pack of his own, Changbin was more than happy to follow him as his right hand. Changbin’s parents were not exactly thrilled by that decision, since they always had this inexplicable dream of him leading a pack–a thought so incredibly ludicrous to Changbin he couldn’t even laugh about it–but they supported him anyway, giving them a place to start their den for it to be soon filled with their friends.

However, Changbin had a secret. Even though Chris was his best friend since childhood, and they knew more of each other than probably any other person ever would, Changbin had never revealed his secret to Chris. It wasn’t until they moved to their den, until Chris had become Changbin’s pack alpha, that he finally shared his secret with Chris.

When Changbin was on his own, when he didn’t have to put up a façade, he yearned of being pampered, of being taken care of, something so not alpha-like he had kept it hidden so deep within him he almost couldn’t believe when the words came out of his mouth as he confessed it to Chris. Changbin had half expected Chris to laugh at him, to judge him–even though logically he knew Chris would never do something like that to him, not when he was being this serious about the topic discussed–but Chris had simply stared back at him, offering a ‘huh, interesting. Never thought an alpha could have omega urges, but I guess it doesn’t sound crazy either’.

Omega urges, as soon as those words left Chris’ mouth Changbin had recoiled, mostly out of reflex. But seeing no judgement in Chris’ eyes as he said it, Changbin started to realise that was exactly what it was. Changbin was an alpha. His scent was that of an alpha, and he behaved much like an alpha most of the time, but deep down, there was a bit of an omega in him, and the moment he understood that, he was finally able to accept himself–or at least, to cope with the fact, acceptance was probably something that would come in due time.

Even after he accepted that fact, though, he still kept it hidden, as his little secret that only he and the alpha of his pack knew. Changbin never really told his packmates either, nor did he ever tell any partner he had ever had–not that he had had that many, to be honest. Whenever he was in a relationship he behaved as an alpha, something that he thought he didn’t mind much, but as his relationships kept on failing and failing because something was never right, he realised it did matter. Yet, he never had the guts to fully show himself to anyone he was intimate with, turning instead to hookups and one night stands to fulfil his physical needs when necessary.

Eventually, though, that stopped, too, after the first scare he had. It was hard for a werewolf to get drunk, their metabolism was much faster than that of humans for alcohol in moderate amounts to do anything to them. Unless, of course, they consumed an ungodly amount of spirits crafted specifically for his kind in a very short period of time. Changbin couldn’t even remember how much he drank that day, but he did remember the fact that his judgement was completely clouded, enough to hook up with someone without protection of any kind, without knowing if the other person was clean or not, and the moment he woke up the next day he was scared shitless.

Thankfully–after a mild scolding–Chris and his roommate went with him to one of those pop-up clinics to get checked, both even testing themselves, too, giving him much needed emotional support, even when he finally came up clean after.

So Changbin decided then to stop seeking any physical relief altogether, turning instead to the gym to relieve stress and focusing on his job and any pack matters that they had to deal with, which were already enough of a task on their own. Chris’ pack grew quickly–maybe quicker than they had anticipated. At first, it was only the three of them, Chris, Changbin, and Jisung, but throughout their entire university studies more of their friends joined, finally forming a tight pack of eight.

At the very early stages of their pack, maintaining order was tough, with only Chris as their leader and Changbin as his right hand to organise the rest of them, until Minho joined them and quickly became Chris’ left hand. And eventually, Chris’ roommate came into the picture. A human. A human they had invited to live in their den by sheer chance, a human that, after finding out about their condition, after understanding the bond between pack members, had naturally fallen into the position of pack mum, even when she wasn’t even romantically involved with Chris in any way–although eventually she did get involved romantically with Chris, something that shocked absolutely no one in the pack, considering how painfully obvious Chris’ feelings were, how painfully obvious her feelings were…

Regardless, with the four of them as the foundation of their pack, it became easy to deal with pack matters. They could rely on one another without hesitation, so as the weight of their responsibilities distributed among the four of them, Changbin didn’t have to excessively worry about pack matters anymore. Which meant that most of his stress came from his job.

When Changbin had decided on a whim ages ago to study computer science he didn’t expect it to be difficult, and, to be honest, his journey through university wasn’t any more difficult than anyone else’s, so he was able to graduate within the expected time, with an added extra year to specialise in network engineering. The difficult aspect of his profession came when he actually started to work in the field. People who work in IT weren’t exactly liked within their companies. End users liked to complain about things they didn’t know about, and even when he politely explained in the simplest way he could why something wasn't as easy as they claimed it to be, they always said he simply didn’t want to help and called him names.

This was something Changbin had to deal with on the regular, which wasn’t usually a problem, but it wasn’t exactly pleasant to deal with. Funnily enough, though, there was no worse enemy to someone working in the IT department of a company than another person who was also working in the IT department. This was something Changbin came to understand during his many different jobs in many different companies, but it was especially true in the company he was working for right now.

Having your IT services in-house these days wasn’t a common occurrence, but this particular office wanted to keep things simple, to keep everything ‘within the family’, so around a year ago, Changbin was hired as their network engineer. He was excited for the job position, it’d pay well and the company wasn’t so bad. That excitement almost died on his first day on the job, when he was introduced to one of the IT coordinators of the building.

He had been called to a room for his first IT department meeting, and the second he stepped through the door of the meeting room he was hit with the scent of nutmeg and ginger, a scent he had not smelt in years, since high school, the scent that to this day he’d dream about sometimes–although he’d never say that outloud. And sure enough, the moment Changbin had followed the trail of the scent he was greeted with your surprised eyes looking back at him.

So when the meeting ended, Changbin had reached out to you. You had politely greeted him, introducing yourself as the IT coordinator and offered a ‘hopefully things go smoothly moving forward’. A long time had passed since you two had last seen each other, so surely things had changed, surely you could be amicable with one another.

How wrong he had been.

You were still the same, only more mature–and more beautiful, but Changbin wouldn’t let himself admit that. You were still the same opinionated, bossy omega he had come to know in school, and as months went by, he realised you were one of those IT coordinators that liked to be on top of everything, sometimes too much, getting your nose in other people’s business, in his business.

The very next day you had come to Changbin with an absurd proposition, a way to better monitor the network in the building, Changbin couldn’t help but notice how your scent was again almost hidden under Hyunwoo’s earthy scent, a complete contrast to how it had been the day prior, but he decided to ignore it, focusing on the impossible idea you had suggested to him based on some end user complaints you had received.

And maybe it was the fact that Changbin was almost wired to bicker with you at this point, but at the time he couldn’t help but scoff, offering an admittedly condescending ‘that’s not gonna work’ that had you scoffing as well, effectively reigniting the rivalry that had started since the very first day you met.

It went like this for a while, you offering ideas that Changbin would shut down, Changbin proposing changes that you would be against. However, sometimes, when you two did agree on some points, you were actually able to work on a project together pretty well, with minimal eventualities.

You wouldn’t interact with Changbin outside of work, though. And not because Changbin didn’t make any attempts. He had invited you for drinks a few times, to celebrate the success of a finished project–usually inviting other people as well–but you always declined, alleging you had things to do as soon as work was over. There were no other werewolves in the office, so no one really questioned it, but Changbin knew your ‘things to do’ were probably related to your pack.

One day the department decided to go together for drinks after work, and surprisingly, you accepted. Changbin and you had naturally drifted to each other to talk that night, after all, you did share your condition. And admittedly, when you were not being stubborn and overly questioning of his job, you were okay to talk with, nice, even. So Changbin thought that night would mark the end of your pseudo-feud.

You didn’t go to work the next couple of days after that, and Changbin thought nothing of it, until you came back the following week. There was something off about you that week, you’d talk and interact in meetings, dealing with agreements and disagreements with one another, but outside of those, it was almost as if you were avoiding him, and every week after that it was almost as if he could barely catch your scent at all, only getting whiffs of Hyunwoo whenever you passed by.

But Changbin never really thought too much about it, he figured you were just mad at him for the last few meetings you had had where there had been disagreements between the engineers and the project managers and IT coordinators, so he simply let it be, just as he always did.

Until one day, he couldn’t just let it be anymore.

Changbin was fond of rainy days like these, especially after a long day at work. He already had a plan in his mind for the evening, brew himself some tea, play a lighthearted movie on the huge-ass TV he just got for his living room, and ultimately become one with his sofa. It was the perfect plan, and he had been looking forward to this since the second he stepped out of the office that day.

The kettle whistled, letting him know his water was ready, so he went through the familiar motions of serving himself some tea. Whole milk, two sugars, exactly how Changbin loved it, he had even used his favourite cup with its matching plate–a basic white ensemble, but the shape and depth of it was just exquisite. With lazy steps, he took his perfect cup of tea to the coffee table, setting it on the coaster he always kept there for this purpose, and it was just as he was about to let his bum hit the heavenly cushions of his sofa that a loud, hurried knocking resonated throughout his flat.

Changbin’s right eye twitched, feeling annoyance build and build rapidly within him the more the person on the other side knocked. Who dared have the audacity of disturbing his peace? He had been so close to getting his perfect evening, all of that now just ruined, flushed down the toilet with those relentless knocks. So he made his way to the front door, completely fuming. Who would be on the other side of the door? Jeongin? Jisung? Felix? He could hardly register the scent when he was this mad.

“What the fu–” Changbin’s words died on his tongue, his annoyed frown quickly disappearing as his eyebrows shot up in surprise. Out of all the people he could’ve imagined would be standing behind that door, you were not the one he would’ve ever expected to see. Especially not in the state you were in.

Chewing your lip nervously you just looked at Changbin, your hand holding the strap of the rucksack you carried on your back so tightly your knuckles were turning white. Changbin blinked slightly, still shocked. “What are you… What are you doing here?”

“I…” You shifted your weight from one foot to the other. The longer Changbin looked at you, the longer you stood there, he started to get whiffs of your scent, that scent he hadn’t smelt for weeks now, since it was usually hidden under your alpha’s scent. He was used to your scent, but right now, as you stood there, something didn’t feel quite right… It felt… Different, somehow. More distressed. “I didn’t know where else to go, to be honest…”

Changbin just stared at you. Were you… Were you shaking? You were soaking wet for sure, the rain certainly had done a number on you. The more he got that distressed scent, the more he looked at you shivering there at his doorstep, he just couldn’t help his alpha instincts from kicking in. Regardless of how much Changbin didn’t like you–because he didn’t like you, not even a little bit–he just couldn’t leave you right there when you looked so defeated. So he stepped to the side, signalling you to come in.

As soon as you stepped through the threshold he closed the door, leaving you taking your shoes off by the entrance as he made his way towards the bathroom to find a clean towel. When he returned to the living room you were just standing there, looking around, still shaking like a leaf and holding onto your rucksack for dear life.

“You can just leave that anywhere”, Changbin pointed to your rucksack, and you just dropped it on the floor right there where you were standing. “Here”, handing you the towel, he took the rucksack and put it next to a dining chair so neither of you would trip on it.

Changbin had seen you in so many different moods throughout the years. Playful, teasing, fuming, annoyed… But this… Whatever it was, was something that completely caught him off guard, so much so he couldn’t stop looking at you as you tried your best to squeeze water out of your hair.

“What are you doing here?” He asked again, crossing his arms over his chest as he looked at you.

You took a deep breath, wrapping the towel over your shoulders and keeping it close to your body. “Do you mind if I… If I sit?” you pointed towards one of the stools by the kitchen island, to what Changbin simply nodded, his eyes following your every move.

“Changbin, could you… Not look at me? You’re close to using the predator stare and it’s not making it any easier for me to talk”, was he using the predator stare? Changbin hadn’t even realised, it was probably because he was angry when he opened the door, which he immediately explained to you and apologised for, to which you simply nodded. He cleared his throat, looking away from you then, and going into the kitchen, switching the kettle on again.

After a few moments of silence you spoke again. “I… I ran away from my pack”.

Changbin almost dropped the cup in his hand, his eyes going wide in surprise, almost bulging out of his skull. “You did what?!”

Swallowing thickly, and contradicting your earlier request, you seeked his gaze. “I ran away from my pack–”

“I heard you, okay… Shit, why would you do that and why are you here?”

“I told you! I didn’t know where else to go!” You were still trembling slightly, still holding onto the corners of the towel wrapped around your shoulders, but even then you still spoke to him in that tone of yours that sometimes made his eye twitch. “I don’t know any other werewolf outside the pack and I know it’s nuts that I’m here, okay? I’m aware…” Bringing your hands to your face, you inhaled deeply only to exhale right after. Once, twice, thrice… Were you… Were you trying to calm yourself down?

“Listen, I…” Once you removed your hands from your face you looked at him, right in the eyes. “I left because I was being mistreated, okay? It’s… I’ve been abused for years and I… I couldn’t stand it anymore”.

Changbin recoiled slightly, this was a turn of events he would’ve never expected, and he immediately felt concern flooding him. “I’m… I’m sorry, I had no idea–”

“Of course you had no idea!” You spat, and Changbin’s eyes went wide, stunned as he saw tears well in your eyes. “No one knows… No one knows how Hyunwoo runs his pack, no one dares speak about it so of course… Of course you don’t know”.

Curse his alpha instincts, Changbin just couldn’t bear seeing the tears run down your eyes, he couldn’t bear smelling the distress in your scent, so he moved around the kitchen island, reaching for you. “Listen–” To his horror, you flinched as soon as his hands were on you, so he removed them immediately.

“Please, don’t touch me right now…” There was a sob, there was a sob and it broke him. Suddenly whichever pseudo-feud Changbin had with you didn’t matter, this was serious shit.

“I’m sorry”, was all he could say, whether it was for approaching you so suddenly or because of your situation, Changbin wasn’t too sure.

You simply shook your head, bringing your hands to your face once again and you continued to sob. “I don’t know what to do…” Your voice was barely a whisper, but Changbin could hear you, and the feelings your distress evoked in him were not pleasant at all.

“You… Listen, first, you need to warm up…” Changbin moved, reaching for the already boiled water and serving you a cup of tea. “You can… You can cry all you want. If it helps you, cry”.

And you did. You cried a lot. For a while, actually. And Changbin didn’t know what to do. He just sat there next to you on the kitchen island, moving either to bring you a dry towel or to leave a glass of water next to you. His mind was racing as he waited for you to calm down, he really didn’t know much about Hyunwoo’s pack, just that he became the alpha right before you finished school and that you were a member of the pack, but just by the way you flinched when Changbin tried to touch you, it was clear something messed up was happening in there.

Once you managed to stop crying, you reached for that glass of water, dawned it in one go and took a hold of the corner of the towel to ungracefully blow your nose. “This is so messy, I’m sorry”.

“It’s… It’s fine”, and as Changbin said it, he realised it was. You guys didn’t get along, at least not frequently, but this was a much bigger issue than that. “Do you even have a place to stay?”

You shook your head. “I just… Left. I put anything of value in that rucksack and left. I don’t want to get too into detail right now, to be honest, but I had to leave today or it would’ve been over for me”.

Changbin nodded, understanding. He had to make a decision now. You had nowhere else to go, and he couldn’t just leave you on the streets on your own to deal with the distress of leaving your pack and dealing with your abuse at the same time. So he took a deep breath, dragging his hands over his face briefly only to look at you after. “Listen, I gotta talk to Chris–You remember Chris, right?” You nodded, so he continued. “For now you can just… Take a warm shower, change into some dry clothes and we can talk when I’m back. Do you even have clothes in that rucksack?”

“Yeah, just a few shirts and trousers… I couldn’t… Most of my clothes were scented so I decided not to take them”, ah, so Hyunwoo was purposefully scenting your clothes, no wonder Changbin could smell him on you all the time.

“Alright. The bathroom is that way, first door on the left. I’ll be back in a bit”, and then, as an attempt to lift the mood, he added, “don’t steal anything from me while I’m gone”.

To which you simply huffed a chuckle, wiping the tears on your face.

The further away Changbin walked from his flat the more he felt his mind spiralling out of control. What the fuck was he going to do with you? It was all nuts, so by the time he reached Chris’ flat he was almost in full panic mode.

Changbin started to knock on Chris’ door, very fervently and incessantly. A few moments of this passed, until the door opened slightly, enough for Chris to peek his face and look at him, annoyance very clear in his face. “We’re fucking, what do you want?”

Of course they were fucking, when were Chris and his girlfriend not fucking. “Sorry, man, but I really need to talk”.

“Can’t it wait like… Two hours?”

“Two hours?!” Changbin shrieked. “No it cannot wait two fucking hours! It’s really urgent!”

Chris sighed, turning his gaze away from Changbin and into his flat, to look at his girlfriend, Changbin supposed. After a few seconds, he turned back to Changbin. “Fine, give me a few minutes”, was the last thing Chris told him before closing the door, leaving Changbin waiting there in the corridor as he chewed his lip nervously.

When Chris opened the door again, he was wearing nothing but his shorts–admittedly not an uncommon sight, so Changbin was completely unfazed by this. “What’s going on?” Chris asked as he made his way into the kitchen and started to put away some items that were scattered on the counter.

Changbin tried his best to ignore the scent of sex and the lingering pheromones in the air, but it was too strong and distracting to ignore. “Dude, were you guys fucking right here?”

“On the sofa”, Chris shrugged, like it was nothing.

“We sit on that sofa for movie nights, Christopher…”

“And?” Chris snorted. “Didn’t take you for a prude, Changbinnie. Plus, there’s nowhere on this flat we haven’t fucked on”, he slammed his hand on the kitchen counter for emphasis. “Nowhere”, Changbin looked at the counter and immediately removed his hands, making an act to gag, to which Chris simply chuckled. “But anyway, what do you need to talk about?”

“I, uh… Need your advice…” Chris shot Changbin a look, his eyes scanning his face for a moment only to go back to his task and gesture for him to continue. “You remember that girl from work? The one I talk about sometimes?” Changbin moved to sit on one of the stools.

“The omega that drives you absolutely insane? That went to school with us? Yeah, I remember”.

“She came to my door twenty minutes ago… She ran away from her pack”.

Chris froze on the spot, a bag of mini brownies crunching slightly in his hold as his fist tightened, his eyes snapping up to meet Changbin’s, wide in surprise. “Why’d she… Why did she come to you?” He placed the bag back on the counter, moving around to pull out one of the stools and sitting in front of Changbin, giving him his undivided attention.

Changbin simply shrugged. “She said I’m the only other werewolf she knows outside of her pack, but I… I’m not sure what to do. She has nowhere else to go…”

Chris’ fingers drummed on the counter as he pondered. “You want her to stay here?”

Changbin shrugged. “I guess, I don’t know… Is there any other option?”

Chris eyed him for a bit. “Is she a good person? I haven’t seen her since school”.

Were you? Were you a good person? Changbin was used to bickering and getting into petty arguments with you, you got on his nerves more than he would like to admit. However… When you weren’t addressing him, Changbin had seen the other side of you, the friendly, and supportive side of you. And, admittedly, when you two were able to work without arguments, he had experienced that directly, too.

“I think… She might be. We argue all the time, but to other people she’s… Fine, I guess…”

“Who’s fine?” Chris’ girlfriend appeared from the hall, using a towel to squeeze water out of her hair.

“Changbin’s brought in a guest”, Chris’ eyes followed her, just like they always did and Changbin couldn’t help but roll his eyes and smile fondly at the sight.

“Oh? A guest guest? You want someone to stay?” She regarded Changbin with a smile, busying herself with the rest of the items left on the counter, putting them away into their designated place in the kitchen.

“She’s a fri–” A what? A friend? You and Changbin were certainly not friends, so he corrected himself immediately. “A coworker…”

Changbin filled Chris’ girlfriend in with the details, by the time he was done she was standing in front of where Chris sat, slotted between his legs, as his arms wrapped around her waist and pulled her to him, resting his chin on her shoulder.

“Basically what I’m trying to say is, do you think it’s a good idea for her to stay?” Changbin asked, fidgeting with a random twist tie he found on the kitchen counter.

Chris eyed him for a moment, until he finally spoke again. “You do know this is your building, right?” A smirk crept onto his lips as he looked at Changbin, and it made him let out an exasperated sigh.

“Correction, it’s my parents’ building, and you’re our alpha for crying out loud, you should have the last word on who stays in the den or not”.

“Are you hoping I’ll say no?” The question was pointed, and it almost made Changbin wince.

Changbin stayed silent for a moment, only to finally move his eyes from Chris to his girlfriend. “What do you think?”

She simply shrugged, her hands absentmindedly caressing Chris’ arms around her waist. “No werewolf leaves their pack just like that, right? From what I’ve read and what you’ve told me it’s a hard thing to do, even physically painful… If she’s done that, something serious must’ve happened… I don’t see why she shouldn’t stay, at least for tonight. We could meet her tomorrow once she’s rested and you two can reach an agreement then”, with her last sentence, she pointed to Chris and Changbin.

“I agree. Unless you don’t want me to even consider it at all. Then I’ll just say no”, Chris gave Changbin a look. He always wanted what was best for his packmates, and that sometimes meant making them make their own decisions and supporting said decisions. Which sucked for Changbin, because now he truly had to make a decision.

After his talk with Chris and his girlfriend, Changbin went back to his flat to find you already showered and in dry clothes sitting on his sofa, hugging your legs to your chest. Your face snapped in his direction as soon as he was in your field of vision, and Changbin literally saw the exact second your body tensed up when he started to walk in your direction, hugging your legs tighter against your chest.

Dropping himself on the other end of the sofa, Changbin simply switched on the TV, he figured some background noise would help the awkward aura that had settled in the living room. So, he took a deep breath–trying his best to ignore the way your scent almost shocked his senses–and looked at you. “You can stay here tonight, but tomorrow you’ll have to talk with Chris directly. He wants to meet you in person before he decides if you can stay or not”.

You looked at him, blinking slightly, looking almost shocked. “What?”

“What do you mean ‘what’?”

“You’re… You’re offering me shelter?” You sounded truly incredulous, which in turn made him feel confused.

“Why are you here if not for shelter?”

You just continued to look at him, your eyes jumping around his face for a bit, until finally, you swallowed. “I… I didn’t… Changbin, I truly have no idea what I’m doing here. I just… Started walking, and next thing I knew I was here. I feel so numb right now, I don’t even know what’s going on”.

Changbin figured you could be in shock, so he decided to make the decision for you. “Okay… Let’s do this, you can stay here tonight, rest, get your bearings, and we can talk more about it tomorrow, okay?”

You just stared at him for a bit, until Changbin saw tears well in your eyes, but only for a second, as you brought your hands to your face right after. “Okay…” Your voice was barely a whisper, but Changbin heard you. There was a shift in your scent, it wasn’t exactly distress as before, but it wasn’t entirely pleasant either, more like a tint of defeat and hurt.

Shifting a bit in his seat, Changbin couldn’t help the words that came out of his mouth after. “Do you… Do you want a hug?”

You were silent for a bit, just crying as you shielded your face with your hands. Changbin thought for a moment you might’ve not heard him, until you finally nodded, with the tiniest ‘yes…’ falling from your lips. So Changbin moved as slowly and carefully as he could to not startle you, moving to sit next to you and pull you into his arms, tucking your head in the crook of his neck.

You were slightly trembling, but you let him pull you to him, and to Changbin’s surprise, one of your hands moved away from your face to clutch his shirt as you continued to cry.

The third re-run of The Mummy that week playing on the TV and the pitter-patter of rain against the windows were the only background noises in the flat, mingling with the occasional hiccup or sob leaving your lips. And Changbin couldn’t help but try to make it better somehow. “Shh… It’s okay. You’ll be okay, pup”.

Changbin hugged you for as long as you needed, the occasional word of encouragement leaving his lips, and eventually, you simply fell asleep right then and there in his arms.

“Hey! Nice to meet you!” Hyunjin had a bright smile on his face as he opened the door of Chris’ flat once Changbin knocked on it.

The night before, after you fell asleep and Changbin tucked you into bed in his spare room, he had quickly texted Chris about your kind of shocked state and for him to expect some odd behaviours from you when he met you, to which Chris suggested that maybe having another omega in the house at the time along with his girlfriend could help. So here Hyunjin was, with a showercap on his head and his apple and pear scent mingling with the unpleasant smell of hair bleach radiating from the showercap.

“Come on in, we’re having a selfcare day”, Hyunjin signalled you and Changbin to come in just as he stepped further into the flat, leaving you two by the open door.

You shot Changbin a look, lightly worrying your lip with your teeth, to which he simply gave you a brief pat on the shoulder and a nod. Selfcare days weren’t an uncommon practice, they usually happened in Hyunjin and Felix’s flat, but Changbin figured Chris thought it would be a good idea to settle a more relaxed aura around him, in hopes of easing your nerves a bit.

“Pretty, stop moving so much”, Chris’ giggling voice could be heard as soon as Changbin and you stepped through the door, and once Changbin stole a glance your way he could see your eyes go wide in surprise as you saw the alpha of his pack right there, sitting on his sofa with his girlfriend’s hand in one hand and a brush on the other as he tried to paint her nails.

“You’re taking too long, baby!” Chris’ girlfriend was holding the bottle of nail varnish for Chris to keep dipping the brush into, smiling fondly at the man in front of her as he did his absolute best to not make a mess of her hands.

“Selfcare day and you didn’t explicitly invite me? I’m hurt”, Changbin couldn’t help but joke, clutching his chest dramatically as he walked further into the living room. Chris simply huffed a ‘you were coming anyway’ before he greeted you with a big smile on his face, one of his genuine smiles that made his eyes disappear. Chris was already an overall welcoming person, but when he smiled like this, that feeling heightened tenfold, and Changbin immediately felt you relax a bit where you were standing next to him.

Changbin introduced you to Chris’ girlfriend as well, and in no time all of you were sitting around their coffee table as Hyunjin brought tea from the kitchen.

“You’ve grown so much”, Changbin was surprised when those words left your mouth as you addressed Chris, the comment making him laugh immediately, offering a ‘so have you!’ in response.

It was all smooth sailing from there. You seemed to quickly realise that the dynamic of Changbin’s pack was completely different from whatever dynamic your former pack had, so you loosened up a bit, and Changbin could practically smell how much less stressed you were, which was reassuring in a way–although why he had to feel reassured about that in the first place was beyond him.

Chris asked you for a few details, you simply answered the same way you had to Changbin the day before, that you were being mistreated but didn’t want to get too much into detail because, in your words, ‘I honestly just don’t want to start weeping as soon as the words leave my mouth… Need to… Digest it all first’, which Chris seemed to wholeheartedly understand.

Chris shot Changbin a look, almost as if he wanted to ask him ‘are you sure you don’t want me to say no?’ to which Changbin gave him a minute nod of his head. Something about having grown up together and lived together for so long made it easy for them to communicate wordlessly, and it became even easier after Changbin became Chris’ right hand in the pack, so, after taking a deep breath, Chris simply said, “you can stay here if you want”.

Your eyes went wide in surprise, but before you could say anything, Chris continued. “Although I must warn you, bills really are expensive as shit here. If you can afford it yourself, great. If you can’t, I suggest rooming with someone. I tried on my own, didn’t work. Now I’ve got a lovely roommate and girlfriend, though, so I guess I won anyway”, he reached to pinch one of his girlfriend’s cheeks as he said it, which made her laugh.

A smile formed on your face at the sight, it was small, but it was there and it might’ve been the reason why Changbin spoke his next words. “You can stay with me if you want. We can split the bills”.

You seemed to ponder for a bit, just as Hyunjin left the room to go wash his head with Chris’ girlfriend’s help. Finally, you just nodded. “I think that’s a good idea”.

“I think so, too”, Chris said confidently.

“Is there… Anything in particular I should be aware of regarding omegas in the pack?”

Chris looked at you for a moment, blinking slightly. “I mean… No? We don’t… Honestly, our designation hardly ever influences anything here. If anything, the only rule is to treat everyone with respect, and help out when someone needs it… And we all chime in to pay the communal bills of the building, that’s pretty much it”.

You seemed slightly taken aback by that, a tiny ‘oh…’ leaving your lips as you readjusted yourself in your seat. There was one thing Chris forgot, though, so Changbin added it for him. “Also make sure you inform the group chat when you think you might be going into heat or when you do go into heat… There’s a couple of flats on this floor we use to, uh… Lock ourselves in for those days if we need to”.

“Oh, that, too”, Chris nodded. “Also, if it makes you feel more comfortable, you don’t necessarily need to think of us as your ‘new pack’. These things take time, yeah? So let’s see it as just childhood friends helping each other out, we’ll see how it goes in the future”.

“Sounds… Reasonable… Thank you. Truly”, and Changbin could really hear the thankfulness in your voice.

Just like that, you became Changbin’s roommate. A roommate he wasn’t even looking for, and that he didn’t even need, but as you both made it back to his flat, he realised he didn’t mind all that much.

Changbin had been living on his own for so long he had forgotten how it was like to share his space with someone else. He was wary at first, because he wasn’t sure how you would be outside of your work or school persona, maybe you’d try to move things around to your liking, or maybe you’d be messy and loud and annoying. But the truth was, for the first few days of you being there, Changbin barely even saw you, which was kind of odd considering you decided to take a couple of weeks off of work to deal with your situation, so you definitely were in the house.

You mostly kept to your room, coming out only for food or to go to the bathroom, and whenever you did that when Changbin was there, he could always see the bags under your eyes and the redness from all the crying he supposed you had been doing. He could smell your scent, too, your usual nutmeg and ginger mingling with pure defeat, which, again, wasn’t pleasant at all. He truly hated that you were feeling defeated in the first place, and he truly wished he could make it better somehow.

Eventually, you started to come out more. Changbin would come home from work and find you on the sofa, curled up in a ball, wrapped in blankets with your eyes glued to the TV. There was always food on the stove, which you offered as soon as Changbin came through the door without removing your eyes from the big screen.

Those times, Changbin would simply sit down with you on the sofa, telling you stories about the office, whichever IT mess had been going on that day, essentially having an amicable conversation with you, something that, after a while, made Changbin wonder why you would get prickly with him in the first place before all this happened, so he asked exactly that one day.

“I…” You gulped, then took a sip of the tea in your hand. “I was doing it on purpose”.

Changbin looked at you, confused. “On purpose?”

“Mm”, you moved your eyes from his face back to the TV, tapping your fingers lightly on the mug in your hands. “You’re too friendly sometimes, and I couldn’t let you get too close to me or Hyunwoo would… I mean, he didn’t like it when I got close to other men, much less alpha males”.

You said that statement like it was normal, like you had accepted that to be your fate at the time, and it made Changbin’s blood boil right there where he sat. Suddenly, he remembered… “The night we went out for drinks… You didn’t come to work for a few days after, was it because… I had been talking to you?”

Looking down at the mug in your hands, you nodded with a grimace on your face. “He… Accused me of a lot of things that night. Things that were not true, obviously, and he made it a point to scent me as much as he could in… In ways I don’t even want to describe, honestly. Can we talk about something else?”

Changbin did drop the topic completely that day, but it plagued his mind for a long time. Sure, there was a level of possessiveness to their alpha nature, but it was never supposed to be like this. It was never supposed to overpower their protective nature, above all else, an alpha should take care of their partner both physically and emotionally, they should protect them, it was one of the few alpha traits Changbin was actually proud of having, and this man Hyunwoo had it all twisted and the fact that he had hurt you because of it angered him beyond belief.

Changbin did offer once–although mostly as a half-joke–to go beat him up, to which you simply said ‘If anything, I’ll try to get strong enough so I can beat him up. That’d be more satisfactory. But honestly, I’d much rather pretend he didn’t exist’, so Changbin tried to never speak about Hyunwoo again after that.

You eventually went back to work, got back into your routine, only now you wouldn’t avoid him at all, if anything, you remained somewhat close and friendly. Sure, you still defied his proposals when you had to, and Changbin defied yours when he had to, but it was mostly amicable, nowhere near as hostile as before.

You confessed to Changbin one day that you had even started to go to therapy to try and cope with everything, and he couldn’t help but commend you on taking such an important step in your healing process.

Soon enough, you got acquainted with his friends, you started to join them for movie nights, for selfcare days, and eventually, before Changbin even realised it, you had flooded his life, with your presence, with your scent… Your scent… That mix of nutmeg and ginger, that mix that had become so familiar, so… Alluring, in a way. He’d be caught dead before admitting that to you, though, but that was certainly the best way he could put it. Alluring. Like freshly baked cookies, and he quickly realised he didn’t mind it one bit.

Changbin was truly fond of rainy days like these, especially now that he had a companion to spend them with. At first, you both would only sit down on your corner of the sofa and watch some mindless film, sometimes you would play the occasional board game–although Changbin quickly discovered you got a bit too… Enthusiastic, to not say aggressive, so the board games were quickly removed from the routine.

Gradually, though, you started to gravitate towards each other. Changbin wasn’t even sure how it happened, really. Sitting on your corner of the sofa became sitting closer to the centre, until eventually your shoulders started to touch, your thighs grazing against each other, providing some warmth during the colder days. One day, you had your arm tossed over the back of the sofa, almost, almost on Changbin’s shoulders… You were really engrossed in the series you were watching, Changbin wasn’t really paying much attention to it, he was just slouched on the plush cushions, scrolling on his phone and then suddenly, he felt it.

Your eyes were trained on the TV, and you were chewing your lip as a particularly stressful situation was happening in the show you were watching, so when your fingers found their way to Changbin’s hair, mindlessly playing with it, Changbin was more than startled by the sudden contact, but, at the same time, he realised he liked it, so he didn’t say anything, instead he just let himself enjoy your touch, your soft caresses against his scalp, and it wasn’t until the episode had finished that you realised what you were doing, quickly removing your hand from his head and mumbling apologies.

“Shit, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to–”

“I don’t mind”, Changbin interrupted you, the words left his mouth probably way too fast, heat quickly making its way to the back of his neck as he cleared his throat. “It’s fine, you can… You can do that. I really don’t mind”.

Changbin saw your slightly stunned expression, your eyes moving away from his face just the tiniest bit as the next episode of your show started to play. When you looked at him again, you gulped, blinking slightly. “Do you want to… I mean it’d be easier if you… You know, lay your head on my lap or… Yeah, otherwise my arm will get tired, you know?”

Changbin looked at you for a few bated breaths, until he tentatively complied, relishing the warmth of your thighs and your tender touch on his hair as you continued to watch the show.

From then on, the space between Changbin and you on that sofa after work became nonexistent. Him laying his head on your lap quickly turned to him laying on your stomach, to him even laying on top of you sometimes, resting his head on your chest as you mindlessly massaged his scalp, his shoulders, his back, his arms. You never really spoke about it, it just sort of… Happened, and you both let it happen.

Changbin simply had convinced himself this was an entirely platonic exchange, just two acquaintances enjoying some warmth as you quietly wound down from your stressful day. Although he did know it was kind of weird, he was well aware. Cuddling with your coworker turned roommate this closely surely wasn’t normal, yet neither you nor him would stop it. Changbin wasn’t sure why you didn’t, as for himself, he just absolutely loved to cuddle… To cuddle with you.

He loved hearing your heart beating against his ear, he loved the feel of your hands on him, he loved the nutmeg and ginger of your scent flooding his senses, and it wasn’t until a few weeks after the entire thing started that he realised this could potentially hurt him deeply. It happened in an instant, just as you both laid on the sofa, him on top of you, your hand mindlessly caressing his nape, his face buried in the crook of your neck, and suddenly, he got an urge. Changbin wanted to place a kiss on your neck, he’d gotten so used to being this close to you without any restraint that he had almost done it, but he managed to stop himself.

Cuddling was one thing, kissing… Kissing felt like it could become too much, too quickly, so he buried that urge deep within him, pulling himself away from you entirely with the excuse of wanting to make dinner. You didn’t question him, of course. You never questioned any of Changbin’s actions when you were in this type of mood, so he thought he was in the clear. It had probably just been a fluke, something instinctual that would naturally happen when he was so close to your neck.

Oh, but he had been so wrong. That urge he tried to bury deep within his heart quickly grew legs, dancing all around the place as if it owned it, mocking him. Changbin wanted to have his lips on your skin, the thought quickly mingled into him wanting to have his hands on your skin, into him wanting to have your lips on his skin, and before he knew it, he was down bad and it was too late.

It wasn’t appropriate, was it? You were his coworker, his roommate, his friend, and it wasn’t appropriate to think about a friend that way, he was sure, especially considering the things you had been through–although you did tell him you were making progress with your therapy, good progress, which Changbin was really happy about, but that didn’t mean it made it okay. So Changbin tried his best to ignore it all, to pretend those urges and feelings weren’t there, indulging only in your cuddling, and only when you wanted it–because there was no way he could give that up now, not when you seemed to also enjoy it as much as he did.

Until one day, you didn’t let him ignore the elephant in the room anymore.

“Do you think it’s weird?” You suddenly asked, startling him slightly, your hand in his hair not stopping its movements.

Changbin tensed slightly, but he decided to play aloof. Afterall, he wasn’t really sure what you were truly referring to. “That what’s weird?”

“This”, you tugged on his hair gently, and Changbin had to use every single ounce of willpower to not make any obscene sounds. “The way we cuddle”.

‘The way we cuddle’, that was your answer. It wasn’t ‘that we cuddle’, but specifically the way you both cuddled. And Changbin couldn’t help but prop himself on his elbows to look at your face, making you move your hand away from his head. “In which way are we cuddling, pup?”

“Well, you know…” You gulped, and Changbin could’ve sworn you were looking at his mouth. “It’s mostly… Me kinda… Kinda doting on you. Not the other way around”.

Changbin blinked slightly, and he couldn’t help the feeling of dread that was starting to build within him. “Uh… Yeah. It’s you doting on me, yes”, Changbin gulped the saliva that collected in his mouth, nervousness suddenly flooding his brain.

“You’re an alpha”, there was no ill-intent in your voice, none at all, yet the words struck Changbin’s heart, and suddenly he couldn’t bear looking at your face anymore, feeling as heat quickly made its way to his face as he scrambled to remove himself from you entirely. He saw the alarm on your face, but honestly he could barely register it as he swiftly got to his feet and tried to get as far away from that sofa as possible.

“Bin? Why are you–”

He couldn’t have this conversation. He’d only truly ever had it with Chris, and he wasn’t sure he could have it with you right now. Changbin had indulged, and for a few months he had experienced something he had always craved, but just as he had expected, it couldn’t be as simple as that. You’re an alpha, you’re an alpha, you’re an alpha, the words repeated in his mind incessantly, making it hard for him to hear anything else other than them.

“Changbin, wait!”

Changbin slammed his bedroom door shut, pressing his back to it and bringing his hands to his head as he felt tears well in his eyes. Changbin was an alpha. It was wrong of him to crave these things. It was weird and wrong and unnatural, he was weird and wrong and unnatural.

There was a knock on his door, tentative, shy, almost. “I’m… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you…” Oh, God. You sounded genuinely hurt, and he hated it. Why were you hurt? Why were you apologising? He was the fucked up one, and the second he got a whiff of your scent, even with the door that separated you two, he could just feel how distressed you were, and he realised then that you could probably also smell how distressed he was, which made everything just so much worse.

You stayed behind his door for a while, for a long while. All as Changbin let himself cry in silence out of the pure frustration he felt, until he eventually calmed down. By that point, though, you had already left, retreating to your room.

Changbin avoided you like the plague after that encounter, at home, at work, opting out of movie nights with the pack, he’d try his absolute best to not cross paths with you. Mostly out of shame, out of the sheer embarrassment he knew he would feel the moment you found out about his hidden flaw.

Server rooms were always too loud. And if it was loud to a human, it was even worse for a werewolf. Changbin always felt as if he was trapped in a tin can with the most obnoxious cricket whenever he came down here to check the switches, but he couldn’t neglect his job just because of his supernatural capabilities, so here he was, tinkering with the damn thing to try and figure out why the network in the third floor was down.

He would like to blame that loudness in the room shocking his senses for the fact that he hadn’t noticed a person coming into the room. Changbin didn’t notice them, until suddenly he got a whiff of nutmeg and ginger and turned around with wide eyes to find you already staring at him, your brows furrowing in concern.

“You can’t keep avoiding me”, your tone was firm, stern, even. “We live together, we work together… We can’t continue playing cat and mouse, Changbin. I need you to tell me what I did wrong”.

Changbin looked you in the eyes, and you stared right back, just like you often did, just like you always did. Stuffing his hands in his pockets he heaved a sigh, averting his gaze to look instead at the flashing lights of the server behind you. “You didn’t do anything wrong, pup…”

“Then? Why are you avoiding me?” You took a step closer, trying to get his gaze back on your face, but Changbin didn’t move one bit.

“Because you are right. I’m weird”.

You were quiet for a moment. “I didn’t say you were weird?”

Changbin looked at you then, at the puzzled expression on your face. “Yes, you did”.

“No, I didn’t”, there was a frown on your face, and there was nothing more that Changbin wanted right now than to flatten it out. “I said… I asked if the way we were cuddling was weird. I asked if you thought it was weird. I never said you were weird”

“I mean…” Changbin gulped. “Do you think it’s weird?”

“I… Kinda do think the way we cuddle is weird, but not… Not in a bad way. I, uh… I like the way we cuddle, Bin”, you sounded so confident, so absolutely sure of it Changbin was slightly taken aback.

“But I’m an alpha”, he didn’t mean to sound that incredulous, but it certainly came out that way, and you seemed to pick up on it.

“Yes, and I’m an omega”, you were stating the obvious, but you were also clearly trying to make a point. “An omega that… That has… Has always felt uncomfortable in her own skin”.

Changbin blinked slightly, confused. “You… What?”

Taking a deep breath, you dragged your hands over your face, returning your eyes to his right after. “You know why… You know what was my trigger to finally run away from Hyunwoo and his pack?”

You never told him, and he didn’t ask, so of course Changbin didn’t know, so he simply shook his head, and you took this as a sign to continue. “He… He wanted to mate, like, forever mate. He wanted me to submit fully to him by mating with him. He had coaxed me into submission for so many years, with his stupid predator stare and his stupid alpha pheromones and scent… I always hated it, because it wasn’t me, so before it was too late, I finally ran away… Ran away to… To the only alpha I’ve ever known that’s never truly looked down on me”, your eyes went wide in surprise, almost as if you had just realised your last statement.

“But all those years ago in school I–”

“I accepted your apology for that, remember? It was a one off encounter, we’re all assholes at some point in our teenage years. Besides, you never used your status with me again, even when we were bickering. Hell, Changbin, I defied you back then, you know why?”

“Why?”

“Because… Because you smell like freshly made fairy floss… And… And peppercorns”, you gulped, your eyes darting all around his face. “I couldn’t… I mean, I’m sorry to say, Bin, but I really didn’t feel threatened by you at all. I never have”.

“Huh…” Changbin wasn’t sure how to reply to that, how to feel about that, mad because he wasn’t able to succeed at intimidating people as an alpha?–after all, he had been wired to think of that as the norm–or feel happy because he was able to make you feel comfortable around him, even that one and only time he tried to intimate you? It was a lot to unpack, so he decided to ignore it, focusing instead on something else. “Fairy floss and peppercorns?”

“Mm. Fairy floss and peppercorns”, you stated simply, your gaze jumping from one of his eyes to the other.

Gulping the saliva that had collected in his mouth, and encouraged by the lack of judgement in your eyes, Changbin decided to come clean, too. “I’ve been… Trying to get away from you because I was embarrassed. Because I’m an alpha that also doesn’t feel comfortable in his own skin. I think it’s weird, out of the norm, but I like the way we cuddle, too. I’m sorry if I made you think you did anything wrong, you didn’t”.

You quite literally exhaled a sigh of relief, a soft smile making its way onto your face. “Good. Then let’s stop the awkwardness, yeah?”

Changbin nodded, a smile of his own painting on his lips. With one final bright smile, you finally turned away from him, opening the door to leave the server room and return to your work.

“And just so you know”, you said right before you stepped out the door, turning back to look at him. “I… I like fairy floss… And… And peppercorns”, Changbin’s eyes went wide in surprise. “So, you don’t need to feel embarrassed around me for being you”.

Before Changbin could say anything, you were already out of his sight, the door quietly clicking shut behind you. Changbin couldn’t quite understand what had just happened, but he felt heat spread on his face. Only that this time, it wasn’t out of embarrassment.

Changbin was truly, truly fond of rainy days like these, even more so now that he could spend them cuddling with you again. As soon as you talked to him in the server room, as soon as Changbin let himself be vulnerable with you, your cuddling sessions were back in order–if anything, they were even more frequent now.

Sometimes, when it was late at night and you felt particularly cold, you’d shyly knock on Changbin’s door, patiently waiting for him to signal you to come in, only to tuck yourself under the covers and push your body against his right after, and Changbin loved it. He’d often wake up in your arms, either with his head laying on your chest or with you spooning him from behind and dear heavens if he loved being a little spoon, your little spoon.

Changbin was used to cuddling his younger packmates, skinship wasn’t uncommon in their pack–on the contrary, everyone was stupidly touchy with each other–but when Changbin got to cuddle with you, it all felt so starkly different, warmer, safer, so he’d go into your arms as often as he could, just as he was doing now.

This was by far his favourite position to cuddle with you as of now, with one of your hands softly caressing his back and shoulders, with your fingers in his hair massaging his scalp, with his head on your chest, feeling your beating heart under his ear, feeling the rise and fall of your chest with each intake of breath, enjoying the cushion of your breasts. It was soothing, and Changbin would often find himself drifting off to sleep when you cuddled like this.

Today something was different, though. Among the pitter-patter of rain on the windows of your home, among the sounds of the third episode of Merlin you were watching today, he could also hear your heart, beating a bit faster than usual. So he couldn’t help himself when he asked, “you okay?”

“Mm”, was all you mumbled in response, your eyes still glued to the TV, your soft caresses not stopping.

Changbin simply hummed in response as well, closing his eyes again and burying his face further in the crook of your neck, almost brushing your skin with his nose. “You smell like autumn”, he couldn’t help but mumble.

“Like autumn?” You asked with a chuckle, burying your fingers further in his hair.

“Mm. Nutmeg and ginger. Like autumn and freshly baked cookies”.

You hummed, angling your head the tiniest bit to the side, almost as if you were giving Changbin more space to get even closer to your neck.

“I like freshly baked cookies…” He really couldn’t help himself when he inhaled deeply, taking in your comforting scent. It was almost overwhelming, how it coursed through his body, reaching areas deep within him, transporting him to that everlasting autumn. And maybe it was that feeling of comfort, or maybe it was the fact that he just couldn’t keep his urges hidden anymore, but before he knew it, he had pressed a soft kiss to your neck, right on your pulse point.

Changbin would’ve panicked once he realised what he’d done, but your reaction was enough for him not to. A satisfied hum that vibrated against his lips, your heartbeat picking up just the tiniest bit, and the fingers you had threaded in his hair almost, almost pushing him further into your neck. So, instead of shying away, he did it again, and again, and again, and again… Slowly, leisurely pressing kisses on the expanse of your neck to his heart’s content, revelling in the warmth of your skin on his lips.

However, Changbin quickly realised it wasn’t enough, that he had opened a dam in his heart that couldn’t be closed off anymore. So, emboldened by the lack of distress in your scent, by the quickening of your heartbeat, and by the almost inaudible rumble that started in your chest, his lips ventured further up, finding your cheek, and pressing soft kisses there, too. Many kisses. Pecks of his lips on your cheek where he could feel your skin heat up under his touch. And before he knew it, he found your lips, where he placed a kiss that lasted longer than the rest, a rumble of his own starting deep within his chest as he felt your lips react to him, pressing pecks of your own on his lips for as long as he did.

When Changbin pulled away from your lips and finally opened his eyes, he could’ve melted right then and there. There was a deep blush spreading all over your cheeks, but you looked so relaxed as you looked back at him, so content, he started to feel his cheeks heat up as well. Changbin was going to say something, to address what he had just done, but before he could, your hand was on his nape, pulling him down to you, sealing your mouths again.

This kiss wasn’t the same, though. It was loaded, heated, your tongue softly swiping over his bottom lip to get him to open his mouth, which he couldn’t help but do as soon as he registered the movement of your wet muscle on his skin. Your fingers threaded in his hair, holding the strands firmly between your fingers to angle his head to your liking as your tongues got acquaintanced with one another. Your previously barely audible rumble was now reverberating against Changbin’s chest full force, and the combination of his and yours had the whole sofa vibrating as you continued to kiss.

Soon, the sound of the raindrops hitting your windows, the sound of Merlin and Arthur speaking in the background, and the sound of your combined, synced rumble mingled with the wet sounds of your kiss, that, added to the overall feeling of it, to the feeling of your tongue and your lips against his, to the warmth of your body below him, had Changbin’s head spinning. And it all only intensified the moment he started to smell the change in your scent, from its usually relaxed tint to what Changbin knew to be lust, and he was sure you were noticing it in his, too. There was no way you wouldn’t, not when each graze of your tongue against his had all the blood rushing from his head to his crotch, and eventually you would notice that, too.

Pulling on his hair you got Changbin to detach his lips from yours, got him to look at you. “Changbin…” Your eyes darted all around his face, from his eyes to his nose to his lips and back up, and when you finally looked him in the eyes again, Changbin couldn’t help but swallow the saliva that had collected in his mouth.

“I like you”, you said simply, the words rolling off of your tongue easily as you stared confidently into his eyes, just as he stared right back.

“I like you, too, pup. So mu–” Before he could finish talking your lips were on his again, making him moan.

“How much?” You mumbled against his lips, just as he felt your legs shuffle below him, shuffle so you could press one of them further against his crotch, feeling him up.

“So, so much”, Changbin mumbled back between pecks of his lips, rolling his hips the tiniest bit so you could feel him even more. “Can’t you feel it?”

“Mm, I can”, your free hand set a trail down his spine, and Changbin couldn’t help but shiver with the motion. “But I want you to show me”.

Changbin’s mouth detached from yours then, so he could look you in the eyes. Your pupils were blown, your scent was everywhere, almost clouding his senses completely, but he had to ask. “You… You sure?”

“Positive”, the hand you had on his lower back moved further down, for you to grab a handful of his bum. “Are you?”

His lips were back on yours in an instant, a shared moan of relief escaping you both upon contact, getting lost in the other’s mouth. Changbin trailed kisses from your mouth, to your cheek, finally finding himself back on your neck, inhaling your scent and kissing your pulsepoint to mumble a ‘so fucking sure’ against your skin just as his hand sneaked below your shirt, dragging all the way from your belly to finally settle on your ribs. He wanted to be careful, he wanted to enjoy it, he wanted you to enjoy it, and before his brain could send the signal to his hand, your hand was already on his, pushing his further up to cup your breast.

Changbin couldn’t help but groan as he squeezed and kneaded the tender flesh, relishing the way your breath hitched in your throat from the motions of his hand. “Is there anything I shouldn’t do?” He mumbled against your neck, just as his thumb grazed your nipple.

“Don’t call me degrading names”, he could feel the movement of your throat against his lips as you swallowed, and he acknowledged your request with a hum. “Let’s… Let’s keep it simple for now, is that okay with you?”

Changbin moved away from your neck to look you in the eyes, the movement of his thumb on your nipple stopping, but he kept his hand there. “Yes. Tell me anything you want and I’ll do it. Anything”.

“Anything?”

Changbin nodded, so you continued. “I’ve been thinking… Fantasising…”

“Oh, have you? Of?” Changbin couldn’t help but smirk, making you scoff a laugh.

“Yes. Don’t look so smug, makes me want to wipe the look off of your face”, you pressed your leg further against him, making him inhale deeply. “Give me head”.

Changbin’s mouth watered immediately. And it was just as he was about to move his hand off of your breast that you added, “always wanted to know how it felt like”.

Changbin paused his movements immediately, seeking your gaze. “You… Never?”

You shook your head. “Never”.

Changbin couldn’t help but scoff, incredulous, mumbling a ‘what a shitty alpha’ that made you chuckle before he started his descent down your body. You wanted him to give you head? Oh, he would give you head. He’d give you the best head he’d ever given. Hooking his fingers on the waistband of your shorts, he gave you a final look, seeking your confirmation, which you gave him almost immediately, so he pulled the shorts off of your legs. You weren��t wearing any underwear, and he would’ve commented on it had he not been too focused on the sight.

Admittedly, he had thought about this, too. Too many times, maybe too frequently, and now that Changbin had your consent, now that he knew you wanted it, too, he was more than eager to comply with your wishes, bringing a hand to your core and spreading your folds with his fingers. He couldn’t help but swear under his breath, feeling himself grow impossibly hard as he stared, until finally, he dived, landing tentative licks on your clit that your thighs twitching and an incredulous ‘oh…’ falling from your lips.

He went slow first, letting you adjust to the feeling. Or at least, he tried to go slow first, it wasn’t long until your hand made its way to the back of his head, pushing his face further into you and making him groan. “More…”

So he gave you more, eagerly licking you, kissing you, tasting you, and in no time Changbin started to feel your grip on his hair tighten, your soft moans becoming louder and more frequent. That, coupled with the sight of your flushed cheeks looking back at him had him twitching and leaking in his underwear.

“You–You’d give me…. Anything? Anything I want?” You were breathless, pausing between words as you swallowed thickly.

Changbin simply hummed against your skin, nodding slightly, the movement of his tongue and his lips on you not stopping for one second.

“Finger me, too”, Changbin couldn’t help but groan against your heat as the words left your mouth, bringing a finger to your entrance to collect your essence, getting it wet before he finally pushed it in, earning him a satisfied groan from your lips. The warmth he felt around his digit had his mind reeling, and he wanted nothing more than to stuff you full and have you come undone under his tongue.

“More… Shit, Binnie, I’m not gonna break, give me more”.

Who was he to deny such a request? Changbin quickly added another finger, letting you adjust as he pumped in and out of you, as he rubbed all those sensitive spots within your warm walls, until eventually, he added another, and then another… Stuffing you full of four of his fingers to stretch you open as much as he could without causing any discomfort, with his lips around your clit and his tongue flicking it in his mouth.

Your other hand eventually joined the other one that had been tugging on his hair, holding Changbin’s head in place as you rolled your hips to rub yourself against his tongue, to push yourself against his fingers, the most delicious noises leaving your lips, moans and groans and grunts and swears, and it was all so much, so much and so good, and he truly, truly wanted to make you come.

“Shit… Fuck, I’m–” Your words died on your tongue, replaced by a restrained moan as you bit your lower lip to contain the sound within your mouth.

And then finally, after a few more thrusts of his fingers, after a few more flicks of his tongue, Changbin felt your walls clench around his digits, the repeating flutter ripping a growl out of his chest as he continued his movements to help you ride your high. It wasn’t until then that he realised he had been rutting against the sofa, the action would’ve made him feel embarrassed had he not been too enthralled by the blissed expression on your face to care.

Your hands finally moved away from Changbin’s head as you lightly gasped for air, propping yourself on your elbows to look at him, just as he removed his mouth and his fingers from your core to pepper kisses on your thighs and to spread the remnants of your release on the soft skin.

“Well, fuck…” You were panting slightly, a soft chuckle falling from your lips.

“Did that show you how much I like you?” A smirk made its way onto Changbin’s face as he took in the sight of your flushed cheeks.

You simply nodded, eagerly. “Now… Sit down and let me show you”.

Changbin did as asked, sitting on the sofa just as you straddled his lap, bringing your mouth to his for a heated kiss. Tugging on his shirt, you mumbled an ‘off’, moving away from his mouth just so you could remove the garment from his frame. “Fuck, look at these”, your hands found his pecks, squishing the relaxed muscles of his chest, feeling him up as your eyes fixed on the movement of your hands.

“My eyes are up here, pup”, Changbin couldn’t help but chuckle, his hands finding purchase on your waist.

“Uhum, and your tits are down here, shit”, you squeezed him a few times, making him laugh, a truly hearty laugh and he couldn’t help his cheeks from heating up. You finally turned your eyes back up to his, smirking. “Getting me all distracted with these, damn”.

Before Changbin could even reply to your comment, you had already tugged your shirt swiftly off of you as well, and he couldn’t help but zero in on your breasts as they jiggled slightly with the motion, making him swallow thickly. Taking a hold of his jaw you pulled his head up to make him look at you with a smirk plastered on your face. “My eyes are up here, Bin”, with that you connected your mouth to his, sealing your words with a heated kiss.

Changbin couldn’t stop his hands from moving lower, settling on your bum to fondle the flesh, a desperate groan falling from his lips and disappearing into your mouth once you leaned forward, pressing your bare chest against his and laying your hand palm flat on his abs, letting him enjoy the warmth of your bare skin against his. Trailing your hand further down, you settled on his crotch, finding his bulge with ease and feeling him up, making him buck his hips forward.

“Wanna touch you, Bin”, you mumbled against his lips, emphasising your words with a squeeze on the outline of his length.

“Touch me”, Changbin was surprised at how desperate his own voice came out, but he was honestly too horny, too distracted by your touch, by your warmth, by your scent, to care at all. “Touch me however you want…”

Sneaking your hand under his shorts and his underwear, your palm made contact with his bare skin, and he couldn’t help but inhale deeply, an action he did to try to ground himself, but that only made him take in more of your delicious scent, further clouding his senses. Resting your weight on your knees you hovered over his lap a bit to pull the garments down enough to free his length, lowering yourself on his thighs and wrapping your hand around him immediately after.

“Fuck… Wanna… Wanna touch you, too”, Changbin couldn’t help but moan as you tightened your grip around his cock, pumping him almost teasingly.

“Touch me”, you mumbled against his lips, and it was all he needed to move one of his hands from where it was gripping your rear to your core, easing two of his fingers into you, scissoring you open, relishing the way you moaned as soon as he did.

“You’re so hard, Binnie. Is this all for me?” You were breathing heavily, talking between kisses as you rolled your hips ever so slightly to enhance the feel of Changbin’s fingers within your walls. Separating your lips from his for a bit, you removed your hand from him, bringing it instead close to your mouth so you could spit on it, wrapping it around his cock immediately after and starting a fast pace around him.

“All for you, shit…” The feel of your hand around him, pumping him, your walls around his fingers, clenching with every single one of his movements, had him twitching and leaking in your hand, had his mind racing and his mouth watering with every single movement. “Want you…”

“Mmm… Want you, too”, your hand around his length slowed down, just as you kissed him briefly. “Condom?” You mumbled against his lips, moving away to press kisses on his neck.

Changbin gulped, trying not to get too distracted by the feel of your tongue on his pulse point. “In my bedroom”.

You hummed, grazing your teeth against his skin, making Changbin inhale a shaky breath. “Your bedroom it is”.

Removing his fingers from your core, Changbin brought both hands to your rear, making sure his hold was secure before he stood up from the sofa, carrying you safely in his arms as you continued to press kisses on his neck, admittedly making his steps less steady than they should’ve been, especially when you started to mumble in his ear just as you tugged on his hair. “Want you in me, Binnie. So bad…”

“You’ll have me, pup. However you want”, Changbin dropped you on his bed, pulling the drawer of his bedside table with more force than necessary, making everything in it ungraciously rattle with the motion. He found the box of condoms with ease, dropping it on his bed right next to where you had propped yourself on his pillows before he got rid of his shorts and his underwear, and crawled on top of you, claiming your lips once again.

The feel of your bare chest against his again had Changbin groaning upon contact, you were warm and soft and he wanted nothing more than to continue feeling your body against his, nothing more than to bury himself in your cunt and give you anything you asked him for. Changbin felt your hand reaching for the box of condoms as you kissed, and by the time he had propped himself up away from your mouth you had already torn the foil open and taken the condom out.

Licking your lips, you took his length in your hand, pumping him a few times, making Changbin swear under his breath. “Scoot back a bit”, you instructed him, and he did, moving away from you just as you pushed on his chest until he was sitting on the bed. Slowly, carefully, you slid the condom down his cock, Changbin’s hand wrapping around himself right after to make sure it was secure in place with a couple of pumps just as you leaned in to kiss him.

“Sit more comfortably, Bin”, you mumbled against his lips. “Wanna ride you”.

Changbin did as asked, holding his breath as you straddled his hips and took a hold of his cock, lining it with your entrance, until you finally sank down on him, taking him in in one easy motion. There was a shared groan of relief, and a loud ‘fuck’ falling from your lips as soon as he was buried to the hilt within your walls. Your warmth, the way he fit within your walls, had his senses on edge, and Changbin’s self-inflicted months of celibacy were certainly catching up to him right now.

“Shit, puppy… Don’t think I’ll last, you’re so fucking tig–” Changbin choked on his words as you started to move, bouncing up and down his length with fervour, barely giving him any time to catch his breath.

“And you’re so fucking big”, taking a hold of his hair, you tugged his head back, making him grunt and his cock twitch. “So fucking big like the alpha you are, huh? Stretching me open so good with your fucking monster cock, fuck…” Your lips were on his in an instant, and Changbin felt himself flush. The movement of your hips, the hold you had on his hair, and the words you were saying to him had him moaning against your mouth, he would’ve felt embarrassed, had he not been completely engulfed in your scent, almost overwhelmed by how horny you were, by how horny he was.

With his hands on your rear, Changbin bounced you up and down his length, aiding your own movement and gripping your flesh tightly, making you squeal. And when you removed your mouth from his to attach it to his neck and suck harshly on his skin he decided he didn’t want to hold back in any way, if there was anyone he knew that wouldn’t judge him it was you. So he moved his head, baring his neck further for you, just as he felt his cock leak fluids into the latex. “More… Puppy, more… Please…”

He was barely making any sense, but it seemed like you understood him, since you continued to pepper love bites on his neck, and Changbin had to make the conscious effort not to drool. Alphas shouldn’t let others close to their neck like this, it was an act of vulnerability, of submission, and it was much worse to let others mark them. A love bite was, essentially, a wound, and a wound on the neck of an alpha was usually something to be ashamed of. But alas, Changbin was no ordinary alpha, just like you were no ordinary omega.

When you pulled your lips away from his neck and looked him in the eyes, Changbin couldn’t help but tighten his grip on your rear and bounce you faster on his cock, making you throw your head back and bite your lip to muffle a groan. “Fuck… Warm… Tight…” Changbin could barely talk, he was feeling lightheaded, the feel, the sight, the scent… It was too much.

“You look so pretty, Binnie. So fucking pretty”, you were also breathless, your sentences breaking between moans and groans of your own, and Changbin’s brain was close to shutting off completely, his body moving almost on instinct as he brought a hand to your clit, diligently rubbing circles on the bundle of nerves that had your cunt clenching harder around his cock and whines falling from your mouth.

Your walls had a vice grip on his cock and Changbin felt his abdomen tensing further the more you bounced on top of him, reaching dangerously close. So his hand sped up, determined to get you to your peak, too. “Close…”

“Close, Binnie? Me too. So, so close… Almost there…” Changbin could only frantically nod to your question. “Wanna… Wanna come around my alpha’s cock, fuck…” Changbin couldn’t help but groan, my alpha, my alpha, my alpha, those two words wouldn’t stop resonating in his head, and his reason was slipping between his fingers the more you moved, the more you talked, words of his own starting to play in his mind, my omega, my omega, my omega.

“Wanna make my omega come… Wanna… Wanna come for my omega, too. Please, puppy…” With a few more flicks of his fingers on your clit, Changbin felt you tense up, a quick warning flying past your lips, the movement of your hips stopping as you finally came undone, trembling on top of him.

Returning his hand to your rear, Changbin bounced you on his cock as fast and hard as he could, chasing his own release, feeling his abdomen tighten further and further until finally, he came, a groan of relief flying past his lips as his seed filled the condom and he pushed your hips flush to his to keep you around him for as long as possible just as he dropped his body to the bed, completely spent. “Fuck…”

You leaned into him, pressing kisses on his face, his neck, softly caressing the skin of his chest, making him flush further. “Fuck indeed”, was all you said, which made him chuckle, incredulous.

Wrapping his arms around your waist, Changbin hugged you tightly for a moment, only to release you almost right after. “Gotta get rid of the condom, pup”.

You straightened yourself, pouting, making him chuckle just as he held the condom at the base of his cock for you to remove yourself from him. As soon as he was sitting again he carefully removed the latex from his length, tying a knot and ungracefully dropping it on the floor to pick up later. Clean up could wait, there was something more important he wanted to do right now. So Changbin laid back down next to where you were, pulling you close to feel your bare skin against his and kiss you deeply, a satisfied hum resonating within you as he did.

When you pulled back from his kiss, you regarded him with a smile that could’ve easily outshine the sun, and you brought a hand to his neck, caressing his skin softly. “Can’t believe you… You trust me enough to let me do this”.

“I’d trust you with anything”, and as Changbin said it, he knew it was true. “I’ve been… Hiding myself, my real self for so long. I don’t want to anymore”.

“I don’t want to, either. Hide my real self… I trust you, too. You make me feel safe, Bin. I do want you to… To be my alpha for real”.

Changbin felt himself flush, but he also felt like teasing you a bit, so he did. “That’d be a problem, then, Chris is the alpha of our pack!”

“Oh, God”, you groaned and weakly slapped his chest. “You know what I mean!”

“Yeah, I know what you mean”, Changbin felt as if his face was going to split open from how wide he was smiling, and, pulling you to him, he placed another kiss on your lips. “I want you as my omega for real, too”.

With a soft chuckle, you pressed a peck on his lips. “Let’s do that, then”.

“Yeah, let’s do that”, cupping your cheek, Changbin simply leaned in and kissed you, relishing the rumble that started to resonate again in your chest, just as his own rumble did, too.

Author’s Notex2: if you want to read more of this couple you can checkout my sort of part 2 to this: Heat.

Constructive feedback is always welcome :)

Changbin’s WereRoomies Instalments: Finding Comfort in Autumn · Heat · The Love I Always Dreamt Of.

#stray kids supernatural au #stray kids fantasy au #stray kids werewolf au #changbin smut #stray kids smut #stray kids fanfiction #changbin fanfiction #changbin fic #changbin x reader #skz fanfic #skz fanfiction #stray kids fanfic #werewolf changbin #✨🌙✏

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ladyloveandjustice · 3 months

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My Favorite New Manga and Graphic Novels I Read in 2023

It's time to take a look at the comics and manga I read this year! I read a whopping 78 manga and graphic novels in all. Here's a link to my Goodreads year in books (the manga is at the beginning, the novels start with Siren Queen) and my storygraph wrap up.

I also read 36 novels! If you want to see my favorites, check out my reviews here!

And finally, I've got the continuing manga series I've enjoyed this year here, so check that post out too!

The Magic Fish by Trung Le Nguyen

This is a tale about a first-generation Vietnamese-American boy struggling with coming out to his mother. He connects with his mother through fairytales-- she uses them to express her journey as an immigrant, and he uses them to explore his queerness and identity as a Vietnamese kid growing up in America. It's an absolutely gorgeous book full of Trung Le Nguyen's signature stunning art. The fantastical, ethereal fairy tales are weaved beautifully into the lives of the characters. The book explores how fairy tales can form connection, can express culture, can tap deeply into something real and true, and can offer tragedy and catharsis. The protagonist uses fairy tales to write his own story, and the ending is lovely and moving.

Exit Stage Left: The Snagglepuss Chronicles by Mark Russell and Mike Feehan

You may know Mark Russell from his darker, socially aware re-imagining of the Flintstones, which made quite a splash on Tumblr with this post. Well, I had pleasure of meeting him at a local convention, and I finally got his comic re-imagining of Snagglepuss, also of Hanna-Barbera. He re-imagines the titular pink puma as a closeted gay playwright in the 50's dealing with McCarthyism. It's as wild as it sounds,but also really digs into the politics of the time, the struggle of standing against oppression and how art fights through suppression and censorship. It's tragic, hopeful, poignant and full of historical references. I enjoyed it ! Definitely be cautious if you're deeply disturbed by homophobia and suicide.

The Summer Hikaru Died by Mokumokuren

A story about a teenage boy, Yoshiki, who realizes that his best friend and crush Hikaru has died and been replaced by a strange eldritch being who is imitating him. But, missing his loved one and desperate to cling to any piece of him, Yoshiki decides to keep on having a relationship with this mysterious entity. This book's horror is visceral and sublime, especially the bizarre, creepy, beautiful body horror involving the being who replaced Hikaru. It's an exploration of anxieties involving grief, relationships, and sexuality that hits just right, and the atmosphere layered with dread is top notch. I love me some messed up relationships and unknowable queer monsters, and this book delivers.

Chainsaw Man, Look Back and Goodbye Eri by Tatsuki Fujimoto

Chainsaw Man needs no introduction, but I did end up really enjoying the story of the doggy-devil boy hunting other devils. It got so tragic and intense at the end, with lots of great surreal horror imagery and darkly funny moments. I'm impressed it went so hard, though the random powers that kept piling up made what was happening hard to follow at times, especially in fights. I'm also enjoying the current weird arc starring a class-A disaster girl and the demon sharing her body.

Look Back

I really do enjoy how Fuijimoto writes messy pre-teen/teenage girls. They ring so true. The manga follows the fraught friendship between two girls as they create manga, exploring the struggle of art mixing with real relationships, and how someone keeps creating after tragedy. It's a little hard to follow at times (especially since I have to differentiate the leads based on hairstyle), but it's a good read.

Goodbye Eri

Probably my least favorite of the three, but it's a fun read- a weird ride that examines the thin line between fiction and reality in art and makes good use of Fujimoto's cinephile background and signature gaslight gatekeep girlboss characters.

Is Love the Answer? by Uta Isaki

The story follows a teenage girl, Chika, who has always struggled with not being attracted to anyone. When Chika enters college, she meets queer people all across the spectrum of asexuality, and starts exploring her own identity. As an ace, this is the best story about asexuality that I've read. It was a nuanced look at asexuality and queerness and all the variations. Chika's journey and how she found her community was moving and poignant. It's a honest, moving look at relationships and identity, and how complicated and hard to define both of those things can be. I loved the moments of Chika imagining herself as an alien to explore and cope, and how she bonded with people through magical girl shows and other geekery. My favorite new manga of the year, it really connected with me!

The Girl that Can’t Get a Girlfriend by Mieri Hiranishi

Oh girl, I've been there. This is a fun autobiographical comic about a butch4butch lesbian's struggles finding a partner in a word that favors butch/femme, and it's just an honest look at the messiness of loneliness and relationships. I also appreciate that crushing on Haruka in Sailor Moon and becoming a HaruMichi stan was the beginning the author's queer awakening because uh...same! She has taste, and is truly relatable.

Qualia the Purple: The Complete Manga Collection by Hisamitsu Ueo and Shirou Tsunashima

See my review of the light novel here for my general thoughts on the story, since it's adapted pretty faithfully. I do think the manga is overall the best experience though, because the illustrations break up the detailed explanations of quantum mechanics a bit, and it includes a bit of extra content that fleshes things out, especially withthe ending.

The Single Life: 60 year old lesbian who is single and living alone by Akiko Morishima

Just like it says on the tin, this focuses on a 60-year-old single lesbian. And definitely the shortest thing on here, since only one 30 page chapter is out. It's a grounded story about a woman looking back on her journey to finding her identity, touching on sexism in the workplace and other challenges. It paints a portrait of a proudly gay elder who's still perfectly content being single and feels fulfilled by the life she had rather than regretting past relationships. I definitely want to see more.

Daemons of the Shadow Realm by Hiromu Arakawa

Arakawa's latest, the story is about a boy who lives in a small village with his little sister is imprisoned and has to carry out a mysterious duty...but then the village is attacked, supernatural daemons awaken, and everything he knows might be wrong. I'm enjoying this fun romp so far! It delivers an really nice plot twist right out the gate (and an excellent subversion of the usual shonen "must-protect-my-saintly-sister" narratives). It boasts Arakawa's usual fun cast and interesting world (and cool ladies). There's some slight tone and pacing issues in the first part- there's so much time spent explaining mechanics the lead doesn't really get to react to his life turning upside down. But it starts smoothing out by the second volume. I'm excited to see what's next!

Superman: Space Age by Mark Russell and Michael Allred

This is a retelling of Superman set throughout the late fifties to early eighties that has Superman interact with the political and social upheaval of the time and question his own role in things. It explored the Superman mythos through a lot of cool new angles, and has a good Lois (why yes she would break Watergate) which is how I always measure a Superman adaptation. My one complaint is, while I liked some of the things it did with Batman, the ending with the Joker was pretty weak. The ending of the overall comic will also be bizarre for anyone not uses to how weird comics can get, but I think I dug it.

#DRCL by Shin'ichi Sakamoto

A manga retelling of Dracula that focuses on Mina as the protagonist and imagines the characters at an English prep school. It adds a lot of diversity to the characters and has exquisite, evocative art. I'm curious where it will go and what it intends to do with all it's changes (especially Lucy), because right now it's mostly vibes and creepiness and the direction isn't clear.

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f1crecs · 1 month

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Fic Rec List - Daniel/Max

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We've had a couple of Maxiel related asks recently so thought this was the perfect time to get a general list together! :)

nsfw: give, give, take by hungerpunch and thermocline | E | 3.7k

PWP in which transmasc Max tops Daniel for the first time. This PWP is so hot your circuit board may be in danger, fair warning. The characterisations and dialogue are great, Daniel with terrible "sexy" lines and Max a little surprised but very willing to give it to Daniel when he asks for it. I really like how Max's (probably pretty understandable) expectations of Daniel are subverted by the request.

Daniel props himself up on a forearm, cradling his chin in his hand. “Maybe, but—” he affects what he probably thinks is a sultry moue. “—when are you gonna get me on your strap, though?” Max can’t help the way his eyes widen. They’ve been fucking long enough that he supposes it’s not weird of Daniel to ask, but normally the type of men he attracts aren't as… self-possessed about busting it open. He goes from vaguely tired and mellow to wide awake and horny in less than a second; his body suddenly more electricity than muscle. "Uhh," he thinks aloud, his mouth buffering a beat slower than his brain, "... now?"

wish you away in my dreams by @vicsy | M | 7.5k

This is a stunning story, that, through the medium of Max and Daniel's relationship, examines the concept of fear, loss, and misplaced emotions. Everything this writer shares is stunning, but I particularly loved the use of imagery in this one. Beautiful!

Before him, Daniel’s form is incandescent in a golden glimmer, his unruly curls illuminated like a halo around his head. It pulls a punched-out breath out of Max’s lungs. He’ll rip the reconciliation from out of his soul if he has to, he’ll race it to the end, do what he does best, not a drop of fear tipping the scales against him this time.

nsfw: Through the Ages by Bells33 and Whippasnappa | E | 9k

A beautiful examination of Daniel and Max over the years, from 2017 to 2023. Brilliant writing and incredible graphics are interspersed with facts and figures, and it makes for a truly special read.

And here’s the thing; when Daniel laughs, it makes Max laugh too. So they’re laughing, and Daniel is helping Max extricate himself from the table where it’s folded in a bit and grabbed him like a snappy crocodile. And then there’s just this fucking moment where Max is finally upright, they’re stood way too close, inches apart, and he’s still holding on to Max’s arms for some reason. They're the same height, now. Daniel can’t remember when that happened. One moment, he’d been taller than Max. And now, Max meets him directly eye to eye.

nsfw: tender is my heart by @missyourflight | E | 10.6k

This is a Never Let Me Go AU. Daniel works in a cafe by sea. One day, a man walks in and orders a meal. Daniel can tell there is something strange about him, but isn't sure quite what. Eventually, he learns that Max is a clone, created to be an organ donor. This fic is atmospheric, sad, and explores the horrific ethics of the situation Max has been born into. He has been conditioned since birth to accept and embrace his fate - that one day, his organs will be harvested and he will die so that others may live. Daniel is horrified but is fighting against a lifetime of indoctrination to make Max see why.

“Because I thought you were a fucking – closeted Mormon, not –” “I told you I was a donor, you could have asked me to explain, you could have asked me –” “Explain it now, then!” Daniel explodes. “Fucking go on and tell me, Max, I’m all ears.” When Mr Gianpiero had explained it to them, before he was sent away from Hailsham, he’d said, not unkindly and quite clearly, so they understood, “You’re not people, not legally. Your bodies are not your own.” And he’d told them the truth, about the donations. About how long they’d get. “It’s what I’m for,” Max says, the only explanation he has. “It’s not,” Daniel says, grabbing Max’s hands in his. “This –” They’re moving together, as close as they can get, their foreheads pressed against each other, salt on both their faces, and Max feels it, the way he feels it every time Daniel touches him, the rightness of it: this is what his body is for. “This is so fucked,” Daniel says, and it hits Max like ice water. “I shouldn’t have told you,” he says, and when he steps back Daniel doesn’t reach for him again.

nsfw: caught you coming alive by anonymous | E | 17.9k

This is a dystopian future AU in which people are matched by computer before marrying. They meet their matches while blindfolded and are expected to have sex to determine if they're physically attracted and compatible. Daniel is disillusioned and cynical about the process after years of failed matches. It's Max's first time. The ache of loneliness around Daniel is palpable, and Max's guilelessness is completely in character. Max is carrying the baggage of family expectations. Their connection is natural and immediate. The worldbuilding of the story is deft and elegant and never detracts from the character work. Also, it takes a very talented author to write double-blindfolded smut.

His hand is still resting against the inside of Daniel’s bicep, and he inhales like he’s preparing for something. It is so quiet for so long that Max almost asks if Daniel wants to stop. But then they are in motion again and his fingers travel across the crook of his elbow again to the top of his forearm. “I have a little cupid here,” and the Max’s hand is only there for a moment before it’s on the move again, down, “and a bit of love underneath him. In case he needs a boost.” There is a crack, minute, and so quiet Max wonders if he only heard it because he can’t see. Maybe he wouldn’t have noticed the hitch in Daniel’s voice if he was too caught up staring at his face or tracing tattoos he can only shape in his head. But it’s there. Breaking around the word love and not quite putting itself back together by the time he’s finished speaking. Max wishes he could see him, if only to lean in to kiss him without risking a black eye for them both. “And to round off the top half of the tour, we have my beautiful rose.” Daniel’s light, teasing tone is back, and he has laced their hands together, Max’s right in Daniel’s left. “If you just do this,” and he rubs his thumb across the top of Max’s hand, “you might feel it. No thorns to worry about.”

nsfw: glory, from a high rise by @yekoc | E | 24.3k

Another AU, this one featuring Daniel as a bartender and Max as a troubled finance worker who tries to drink (and fuck) his sorrows away. This is one of the first maxiel fics I ever read. It's kind of a greatest hit in Maxiel fandom to the point where I wondered if I should even rec it. But the chance of someone new coming along to the pairing and missing out on this masterpiece is one I can't bear to take. Max's sadness and self-punishment in this story is crushing, and his emotional unavailability makes this relationship's early stages very difficult. Daniel is emotionally mature enough to protect himself and be realistic and clear about what he wants and needs in a partner. It's a long journey for them (and us), but absolutely worth it.

He couldn’t look at Daniel. Daniel didn’t need to apologize; Max knew what he wanted was fucked up, something desperate and out of his control. With Daniel sometimes it had felt better, like it was something okay; like he was good. But Max got it. Daniel wanted a—a boyfriend, someone he took home and went out to dinner with and introduced to his family at Christmas. He was thirty. His friends had families. Daniel deserved that too. He would be good at it.

nsfw: one step closer and i'm real by whichisgolden | E | 24.7k

Max time travels through different universes and falls in love with every version of Daniel. I loved the ending so much (and I won't spoil it but it's absolutely adorable). I also loved the characterization of both Max and Daniel, it felt so real!

“Daniel kissed the side of his face, his eyebrow. “If I did choose,” he said, haltingly. “If I wanted to come back, and what you’re saying is right and you got zapped away into another dimension— I don’t think there’s any universe where I wouldn’t want to do this with you. All Daniel Ricciardos want to kiss you.” Max opened one eye. “What if I have the defective one?” Daniel burst into laughter. “I think we’re all defective, actually. That’s why we like you.” “Okay, shut up.” Max wrestled him down on the couch to kiss him, and then they had to go celebrate.

Anonymous by @boxboxbrioche | M | 26.4k

This fic is partially told through emails & social media messages, and takes place in a parallel-canon 2022 season, where F1 has taken some PR hits because the drivers are constantly getting into fights. The FIA hires an expert public relations manager, who has some... creative solutions, including an anonymous messaging feature between drivers. Every part of this makes me smile: the warm, dry humour, the perfect characterisation & Maxiel dynamic, the PR shenanigans... and, of course, the "anonymous" messages. It feels like a love letter to online friendships, not just anonymous ones - celebrating how you can be your honest self and share what you might not share with people irl (and, if you're Max and Daniel, fall in love all over again in the process!)

P.S. - A big congratulations to Roscoe Hamilton for signing on for a new modelling contract, showing off a range of very fashionable luxury dog jackets. Although the adage goes - ‘never work with children or animals’ - I do sometimes wonder if it would be easier on both counts.

nsfw: there was always warmth between us by @freeuselandonorris | E | 32.1k

Max brings a sex toy to a race and Daniel inevitably finds it. What ensues is rising sexual tension and tiptoeing around each other. I really liked this fic for how it made this single event, Daniel finding Max’s toy, into a deeper story with rising tension and a lot of humanness. I think that was my favourite part about it, how human both this Max and Daniel are, even within the context of sex. The character development was a lot of fun to read and made the pay off even more worth it!

Dan smiles at him in an unfocused sort of way, his hand brushing against Max’s knuckles. Max twitches. Is he doing it on purpose? He glances at Dan’s face but finds it inscrutable.

nsfw: come on, star boy by @yekoc | E | 42k

A high school football AU of Max and Daniel! Featuring past Brocedes and a little bit of angst with Jos being a sucky dad. They live in Alabama and it explores their story in high school love! I loved the writing style so much! I feel like high school AUs are also not super common in the F1 fandom, so it was so nice reading it!

“Do you miss it?” Daniel asks. “Not school, I mean. Soccer. Football.” “Yes,” Max says. He draws his feet up onto the seat and wraps his arms around his legs, chin on his knees. The strap of the seat belt pulls against his broad shoulders. It can’t be very comfortable. Daniel can’t get his head around it, that Max and his dad moved all the way to what, to fucking nowhere Alabama, so that he could play football instead of soccer; so that he could grab hold of some faint trail towards stardom.

nsfw: right where you left me by TheNorthRemembers | E | 54k

It's 2018, and Daniel and Max are driving for Red Bull. It's the Azerbaijan GP, and the inevitable crash happens. Max goes to sleep, but once he wakes up–he finds that he's in a time loop. This is my favorite time loop fic ever! "It's race day" quotes haunt me in my sleep in the best way possible, and the fic delves so much into Daniel leaving Red Bull and how Max deals with it.

All Max can do is stare, his heart beating so hard, he can feel it in his voice as he speaks. “You are leaving.” How are they supposed to be together if Daniel is leaving? If he hates racing with Max so much that he wants to give up his seat with Red Bull, his chance at winning, at winning it all. How can they- He never says ‘I love you’ but he just called Max a child, he just said he’d leave. And what the fuck does that say about them? About Daniel’s feelings for Max? “I’m doing what is best for my career,” Daniel says, like that means anything at all.

this list was compiled by @lydia-petze, @boxboxbrioche, @maaxverstappen, @blueballsracing, @singsweetmelodies

#driver:max #driver:daniel #pairing:daniel/max

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mcgnagallsarmy · 2 months

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Spuffy style Reading Challenge - #26: Ready & Go Reading Challenge

A fic set in the woods:

Promise of Frost by Eurydice [NC-17]

When a snowstorm strands Buffy and Spike, they are forced to turn to each other for strength, especially when a missing Giles, mysterious visitors, and way too much magic threatens to turn it into a not so very merry Christmas. Set mid-S4.

A fic involving a creative outlet:

Chiaroscuro by OffYourBird [R]

At first, Buffy wasn’t even sure it was him. He was all the way across the gallery, far enough that he was reduced to chiaroscuro in motion—a shock of white hair swathed in rich black leather, his eyes dark and glittering and his skin nearly ivory in the bright gallery lights.

A fic featuring food you have not tried:

Hunger by Sunalso [NC-17]

AU. Spike killed his third Slayer, but Dru was already dust. He's been lost, but when his supper turns out to be more than he bargained for, it leaves him hungry for something else instead. And Buffy? She's just hungry.

A fic involving a train ride:

Vernalagnia by violettathepiratequeen [G]

Vernalagnia: A romantic mood brought on by spring. One that even Angel doesn't dare try to get in the middle of.

A graphic novel:

D-straction Day: All Night Long by HappyWhenItRains [Adult Only]

COMIC: Buffy stops by the crypt to see if Spike wants to go patrolling. He does not.

A fic involving ghosts:

Wine-Colored by OffYourBird [NC-17]

There are so many shades of red, but Buffy sticks to the one she knows best.

A fic set on a bus:

A Place to Call Home by all_choseny [NC-17]

Buffy and Spike have beaten The First, and the Hellmouth is closed for good. Now, at the precipice of a new beginning, the pair must decide to finally give love a chance or walk away from each other for good.

A fic where a main character seeks self-improvement:

Reprise by Holly [NC-17]

Spike came back to life and didn’t bother to tell her. Then he died again before she could chew him out. Buffy makes a wish in front of the right kind of demon to set things right and finds herself propelled back to the darkest period of her life.

A fic featuring a (motor)bike ride:

Open Road by HappyWhenItRains [NC-17]

Life Serial takes Buffy and Spike some places neither of them ever expected to go. We, of course, expected it. They did not.

A fic set in or involving something industrial (factory, etc.):

Death Wish by Sigyn [NC-17]

“World is what it is. We fight and we die. Wishing doesn't change that. You can believe in a better world. I have to live in this one.” Anyanka’s wish was broken, but the world it created continues. Now Buffy must join forces with rebel vampires to create a world they can all stand to live in. But can Spike, Drusilla and Angel actually work with a hardened slayer, who would just as soon see them all dust?

A fic involving a plane ride:

Nevertime by anaross [R]

They lost. But they lived. Spike, Blue, and Angel head north to the Arctic to escape the demons set loose in Not Fade Away. (Don't worry... Buffy finds them.)

A fic set in a snow land:

West of the Moon, East of the Sun by KnifeEdge [NC-17]

I keep having the strangest dream. Every night it's the same thing: a dark room, a big bed, and a silent vampire that I can feel, but not see. I'd be wigged, except it's just a dream, right? It'll be a cold day in hell before I ever willingly sleep with a vampire again...

A fic set in a country other than your own:

Favor by EllieRose101 [NC-17]

Spike asks an impossible thing of Buffy––and is stunned when she says yes. Could he really have gone up in her estimation?

A fic featuring a garden:

Unspoken by anaross [R]

"I've always envisioned him giving Buffy a garden that he could never go to in the daytime, to give her something alive for a change." James Marsters.

A fic set in a museum:

Just to Reach You by Sunalso [R]

Post-Series. Spike and Buffy have been a couple for almost two years. The honeymoon is over and together they're discovering they still have a lot to learn about themselves, each other, and how this whole "normal" relationship thing works.

A fic set in a hotel:

A Totally Random Occurrence by Herself [NC-17]

The stake slipped from her fingers, and she had to take a deep breath to stave off the dizziness descending on her like a hood over her head. "You—I thought you were dead." A reunion in New York City. Set post-NFA, spoilers for all of BtVS and AtS.

A fic involving an escape:

The Writing on the Wall by Holly [NC-17]

There was no body to bury. There was no funeral. There was nothing but the three rules and the knowledge that a thousand years of torment was nothing compared to a world without her in it. Spike embarks on a journey through the Gates of Hell to rescue the one he loves, but in order to save her, he must risk losing himself.

A fic set underground or underwater:

Ten Minutes by FlightsofFancy [R]

Buffy, alone, looking for Oz in the Initiative. She only has ten minutes. She finds someone else. Life of a hero, impossible odds.

A fic involving a road trip:

Ties to the World by honeygirl51885 [NC-17]

Spike is gone, but before he went out in a blaze of glory, he slipped a letter into Buffy’s pocket. That letter takes her on a road trip across America, visiting his ties to the world.

#buffy the vampire slayer #btvs #spuffy #ficrec #reading challenges #sunalsolove #violettathepiratequeen #isevery0nehereverystoned #elysianholly

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spookysalem13 · 1 month

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Gothic Purple Makeup

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What a drop dead 💀 gorgeous 😍 gothic purple 💜 makeup look! This graphic eyeliner is stunning ✨️ such an inspirational makeup artist who I love watching create magnificent looks!

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delfiore · 2 years

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don’t fear the reaper [part i]

pairing: wanda maximoff x reader

SPOILERS FOR MULTIVERSE OF MADNESS

synopsis: she took the gamble. what more could she lose?

word count: 0.6k

a/n: this is the product of 2am mom brainrot . . . what the actual fuck is this

>> part ii, part iii, part iv

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

She looked and saw the fear in her children’s eyes, cowering behind the rails as they yelled at her, “Witch! Witch!”

Her fingertips, black and rotten, shakily hovered in front of them, asking them to stop.

It wasn’t supposed to be this way. I did all of this for you. Please don’t be scared.

A force knocked her off her feet, and she landed with a thud on the ground. When she looked up it was you, standing with a protective arm extended in front of the version of her from this universe, the version of her that deserved to be happy.

Why does she get to be happy but I don’t? It’s not fair.

“Stay back.” You said firmly. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Please, Y/N.” She pleaded, her knees buckling underneath her. “P-Please, I did all of this for us.”

“There is no us here, witch.” You seethed. “You hurt my wife, and frightened my kids. I want you to leave.”

She remembered once when she said those exact same words to someone else, someone that threatened her family’s happiness. She had blasted them away from the bubble of reality she created, and now she was on the other side of it, threatening someone else’s happiness. Everyone else’s happiness, but never her own.

When will it ever be her turn?

What is the purpose of this existence but a constant cycle of pain and suffering?

Her chest tightened and ached. She let the sobs take over, and crumpled upon herself on the floor. A hand touched her chin and lifted it. She saw her own sorrow reflected in the eyes of the other her, despite the cuts and bruises.

She was the monster parents warn their kids of at night, an unrelenting killer that won’t stop at anyone’s cost.

The Darkhold had corrupted her mind, already fragile as it was. She let herself be selfish for once, but it came to nothing. It wasn’t her life, it would never be hers to live. A million universes and none in which she could be happy, not unless she was Wanda Maximoff.

The Tower shook like a thousand earthquakes, and rocks began to break off the mountain and rain down on her. America Chavez had disappeared behind her portal, just as a boulder hurried down to block the entrance.

Wanda looked up and saw another boulder rushing down towards her.

“No.”

She closed her eyes.

“This is not how your story ends, Wanda Maximoff.”

The booming, low voice was all she could remember, then the faint image of a bald man with glowing white eyes.

Bright light blinded her when she opened her eyes again. It was quiet. She was in a room many floors above a big city, New York City.

She looked down. Her fingertips were healthy and light-colored, no more the black monstrosity she had had to live with. Her nails were even painted a pure white.

“Oh, there you are.”

She looked over her shoulder, and there you are, with a bright smile.

You approached her heartily and pecked her on the lips. “You ready, babe?”

“F-For what?”

“For the premiere.” You let out a short laugh. “Hello? Earth to Lizzie?”

Lizzie?

There was concern in your eyes, but she couldn’t help but let her eyes wander down towards the stunning attire you wore. Black really was your color. And on your left hand, the one holding hers tenderly, a beautiful diamond ring on your ring finger.

“Y-Yeah, of course.” She forced a smile, as you led her out of the hotel room.

“In this universe, Wanda Maximoff,” the voice returned, “you are not Wanda Maximoff.”

She furrowed her eyebrows as you led her into the back of a fancy car.

“Wanda Maximoff is merely fictitious, hence, as is your pain.”

And then she saw it. As the car stopped in front of a sea of people, seemingly waiting for her, in a big backdrop with bold graphics was a picture of her face, and Strange’s, and Wong’s and America’s. The title read ‘Doctor Strange In The Multiverse of Madness’.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

>> part ii

#wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff imagine #wanda maximoff imagines #wanda maximoff angst #wanda maximoff x you

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