#HE LOOKS LIKE HIS DAD AND EVERY TIME I THINK ABT I WANT TO THROW A BRICK THROUGH A WINDOW | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jiminrings · 3 months

Text

fail-safe

pairing: yoongi x reader

wordcount: 8k

glimpse: growing up, your brother's best friend always berated you for not having a passion in life outside of loving him from afar. when yoongi leaves everything he's ever known for everything he's ever wanted, trying to move on from him becomes your biggest aspiration.

alternatively, yoongi left when you needed him the most, and comes back home at a time when you love him the least.

[ part one, intermission, part two, intermission 02, finale ]

[ a Lot of angst, eventual fluff, brother's best friend AND single dad au, So Much Yearning, unrequited love (initial), jealousy, self-deprecation, a lot of talk abt passion in an empty n hurtful way that most impassioned youngest children feel (it's a specific feeling idk!!!), eventual redemption in the next parts ]

notes: finally got to writing a new series!!! i'm beyond excited for this + this whole new concept and flow i haven't touched on before <3 i hope u love fail-safe as much as i do :-)

as always, lmk what you think <3 send in feedback n love to my askbox anytime!! | series masterlist

Yoongi buys atleast one scratch ticket a week.

The accessibility of buying one is top-notch considering that all he has to do is cross the street, shoot one look to the cashier, and he can either already go hunch in the corner of the road or in the comfort of his room. The moment his coin takes its first dig and he realizes that he’s won yet again, he’s satisfied enough not to buy another ticket.

He doesn’t want to risk losing the win he’s just gained, the odds of him throwing out money besting his chances in adding to his earnings. He thinks everyone’s a little greedy one way or another, but it’s the righteous part of him that thinks he’s different.

You do think that he is for all the right reasons, your vision only tunneling for him alone. He’s this fixed older figure in your life and you can’t figure out how to shrug him off — he’s this generous leech that sucks all of the rationality from your mind but returns it to you twofold, whether in the form of him saying something unintentionally endearing that it makes your chest hurt, or through him having to lightly smack the back of your head.

Yoongi’s your older brother’s best friend and there’s a novelty tag that comes with him, one that can’t be topped by any material possession to your name. He’s there for you, not in the exact way you want him to be, but nonetheless there. He’s special and unattainable at the same time, the finiteness of his love barely extending to you.

He’s there when you want him to burn the latest songs onto a CD you’ve spent all your allowance in, and he’s there when you get annoyed that he sneaked some of his own recommendations in there. You’re there when you later admit that his suggestions aren’t half-bad, and you also happen to be there when he grins at the praise.

He’s there when Namjoon won’t cough up the last slice of his cutlet, not because he’ll actually give you his, but because he’ll help your brother guard his plate. You’d only have to mope for a solid of three seconds before the two of them give up both of their last slices, and you’re there when Yoongi insists for you to try the sauce in the spirit of going out of your routine.

You don’t need Yoongi every single time but in the event that you do, he hangs back. He contemplates and hesitates and doesn’t give in to every single whim that you have, but he’ll be there. He lingers like the last holiday ornament you don’t want to remove until it’s February, his presence being oddly similar to your favorite festivities.

Yoongi’s the equivalent of a holiday you look forward to with each passing month and day; he comes around to and for you in instances, but never even in your most sincere wishes.

“I buy one scratch ticket a week — three if I’m really feeling lucky. When my palms itch, that’s when I know that I really need to buy them.”

He’s calm and collected even when you’re scrunching your nose up at him in combined worry and disbelief, humming mindlessly as you collect your thoughts. He randomly told you about his lottery routine and you’re still trying to wrap your head around how he blows his money off just easily. Yoongi has the mind to put scrap cardboard under you because sitting on the hot concrete with your uniform on can’t possible be a good idea, but you try to play off your fluster into stubbornness.

He’s just playing with his two ever-present coins (lucky charms as he calls them)— one that’s shiny and minted in the present year, the other being the oldest coin he’s ever had that happens to be older than he is — while you mutter about.

“I don’t know, Yoongs. That might be a gambling problem,” you squint, your side comment being heard clearly as day. “Might be the symptoms for hand, foot, and mouth disease too.”

“What— I do not have a gambling problem! My skin’s perfectly fine too, thanks,” he defends, the light shove he gives you doing nothing to tone down your teasing.

“That’s what people with gambling problems say.”

“Give me that-…” he mutters, trying to wrestle you for the sundae he bought you using the money he won from his scratch ticket just awhile ago. You don’t give in easily, even if your laughs that come straight from your chest suggest otherwise. “You don’t get it. It’s just this nice, fun little thing I can look forward to every week. I always buy the cheapest version anyway so when I lose, it’s not a big deal.”

You relent (like you always do when it comes to Yoongi) in understanding, waving him off after regaining your breath. “Nah. I get it. We all have to do things so we wouldn’t lose our shit,” you trail, racking your head to find the right words.“Yours is buying scratch tickets, and mine is-…”

“Yours is what?” Yoongi raises an eyebrow, lips quirked in eagerness to know where you’re going with this. He can’t pinpoint a single thing he can attach to you and neither can you, your actual interests merely reflecting those of the people whom you love.

You love cross-stitching because your mom loves doing it, the tolerance you have for accidentally being pricked by the needle growing over time.

You enjoy playing badminton because Namjoon’s obsessed with the sport, no matter how ratty your rackets and shuttlecocks have become, and no matter how much he pushes you to ring the doorbell to your neighbor’s when he’s sent it flying to their backyard.

You’re probably an imposter yet you don’t feel like it. You don’t feel bad that your life most probably and will only revolve around your mom and Namjoon (maybe even Yoongi); you don’t feel dissatisfied that your life’s mundane.

You go where your love goes.

“Mine is watching you buy scratch tickets,” you shrug easily as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world, making him laugh heartily. You’ve probably done something right because he hauls you up to your feet immediately.

“Get up. I’m buying you your first ticket,” he nudges you, grabbing you by the arm in excitement.

“But I’m not even legal!” you half-heartedly argue, internally excited that you’re finally getting to try your hand at the lottery because you’ve spent a few hundred minutes of your life tuned to the channel to pass the time, awaiting the results for something you haven’t even betted for.

“Right. Like I haven’t seen you trying to squeeze out a drop of beer from our empty cans whenever Namjoon and I drink.”

“Rude,” you roll your eyes playfully, gathering your things from the ground.

“It’s okay. I’ll give you your first sip of beer too if you want,” Yoongi offers sincerely; easily as if you’ve just asked him about the weather.

He’s here to buy you your first scratch ticket, and he’s still here to offer giving you your first sip of liquor in the future.

Your family friend for a cashier vehemently ignores the fact that you’re still underage to participate in the lottery, and instead only chuckles to herself in amusement. She’s an aunt that knows when to step in and not to, and she knows you won’t be harmed by a mere bet. In fact, she knows you won’t be harmed by anything with Yoongi in tow.

“I already used up all my change,” your frown in realization, holding the ticket in your hands in despair despite having scoured your wallet repeatedly.

“Rub it against the pavement. That’s what I do,” Yoongi lies fluidly, a scoff being caught in his throat when you actually attempt to do it. “I was only kidding, Y/N. Jeez,” he groans, pulling out his wallet. “Ugh. Here. You can have one of my lucky coins.”

It’s the old one, tarnished beyond relief that you can barely recognize what it’s actual value is supposed to be.

“Ew. I’m giving it back. It looks prehistoric,” you narrow your eyes, knowing that you don’t even have to put your fingers nears your nose to know that it’s already left a faint stench on them.

Yoongi rolls his eyes, a habit he can’t tell he’s formed himself or got from you. “If you use your brain for one second, you’d realize that it’s actually worth more because it’s older. Collectors would go crazy for that in the future.”

“That sounds like a hoarding problem.”

He’s just had about enough of your whining so he attempts to trade in the old coin for his lucky new one, but you stop him at the last minute with a meek smile.

“Kidding. Thank you. I’ll keep it safe, Yoongi. I promise,” you rush out before he changes his mind, scratching your ticket in silence.

He waits for you because you’re scratching so politely and neatly, a stark opposite to his experienced skill of scratching the paint off in ten strokes or less.

Your face is too close to the ticket that Yoongi can’t tell what’s happening, making him part your hair like a curtain to peek.

“Did you win?”

“Nope.”

“Let me throw that out for you.”

“No!” you squeak, keeping the ticket close to your chest. It’s a bummer that your first time is a loss, but it didn’t mean that you wanted to forget the sentiment behind it. “I-I mean no, I’ll keep it. It’s memorable now that I think about it.”

“Alright,” he shrugs carelessly, a smile breaking out in retaliation. “Hoarder.”

“Gambler,” you spit, tucking the ticket into your pencil case. “Next week again?”

Yoongi agrees, wrapping his head around the fact that he doesn’t have to be alone in his little routine every Friday.

“Sure.”

( ♡ )

You don’t mind getting hand-me-downs.

As a matter of fact, you love receiving them. The wear and tear of the things that came before you is only proof that it’s been loved enough to be passed on to you.

You adore your mother’s dainty vintage watch that she wore throughout college, the hardware and sentiment behind it being pretty enough that you don’t mind constantly getting the battery replaced. You like Namjoon’s shirts that he’s outgrown, even through the numerous phases he’s had wherein only denim and tie-dye filled his closet.

You don’t mind the history behind the numerous things you have in your home, unbothered that you’re probably the only house in the block with the oldest possible rice cooker. The chips in the staircase aren’t covered up with marker ink and neither are the loose stitches in the couch quilt snipped off. It’s home to your mother and Namjoon — if it’s good enough for them, then it’s already the best for you.

Even on top of everything, you don’t mind your family almost always getting you shirts and shoes that have an allowance in them. Your mom would go to Seoul and pick out the exact pair of sneakers you wanted that are atleast three sizes bigger than your actual feet, and you’d barely bat an eye.

You don’t mind the coziness of things that are brought to you, because even if they weren’t offered, you’d seek them yourself.

So when Yoongi mentioned that he’s decluttering his room and needed someone (read: you) to vacuum it up for him, you jump at the chance. You take a grocery bag with you, wear the nearest pair of slippers within your vicinity, and book it to his house as soon as he finished talking.

“Go crazy, kid. Almost everything in that pile is garbage so you can take anything.”

“I feel like I should be more offended than how I feel right now,” you hum, furrowing your eyebrows at the pile in front of you. It’s a mound of Yoongi, or atleast everything he’s ever wanted up until he decided to do a general cleaning of his bedroom.

Yoongi chuckles, going through his pile of clean laundry for him to fold on the side while you scavenge for his things. “It’s either I have you take them or I get ripped off at the thrift store, then I see somebody’s uncle wearing my shirt as an added insult.”

You huff, rummaging through his heap of belongings while conveniently trying to ignore that you may look like somebody’s uncle the moment you wear his clothes. Everything is him; every distressed cap, every unfinished embroidered shirt, and every item of old significance with his initials branded on it.

The thick gray hoodie you’ve been eyeing (along with its owner) for the better part of the last few years surfaces into your field of vision, your gasp audible enough to make him jolt because he thought you’d gotten hurt.

“No way, this too? But this is your favorite,” you half-complain and half-rejoice, turning the hoodie inside-out eagerly in the fear that there’s a catch to it belonging in the pile.

“Eh. I know it looked good on me but I don’t think it’s my favorite. Besides, I’ve bulked up! Wanna feel?” Yoongi grins, his segue eerily similar to your brother’s at every given chance. A neighbor from down the block recently opened a small-time gym, and the both of them have not been able to shut their mouths about it since. From their gossiping alone, Yoongi and Namjoon have generated enough advertising already.

“You and Namjoon really have to stop asking random people to feel your biceps.”

There’s random knick-knacks throughout the clump in the middle of his bed, some being too good and actually useful that you snag them. Yoongi lets you do what you want anyways (most of the time), not having to turn his head to berate you on what you’re only allowed to grab from his stuff.

You’re not greedy — you already have his hoodie and that should be enough on its own. But there’s that handkerchief with his initials embroidered on it, then that Rubik’s cube he swore his relative got for him from New York, and even the little butterfly knife he got from a souvenir shop when his family when to the beach.

There were those and there is this, looking up at you in all of its glory.

“Yoongi.”

“What now?” he sighs at your dramatic gasp, looking up from his folded laundry to see what you were going on about. It takes a second for him to fully realize why exactly were you so pumped.

“Are you serious? Your helmet?” you squeal, already hugging the shiny red mass close to you. “Does this mean you’re passing your motorcycle to me?!”

“Are you crazy? Fuck no,” Yoongi rolls his eyes, snatching his helmet back from you. He doesn’t miss the bratty frown that fills up your entire face; he’s not exactly the biggest fan whenever you were upset or angry; maybe even both. “Obviously I forgot I even put my helmet there when I made that pile.”

You whine, stomping your feet in exasperation. You would dramatically plop down on his bed if only it wasn’t full of his shit. “Come on! You told me you were teaching me as soon as you finish teaching Joon.”

“Teaching you how to ride my scooter is not the same as giving you it. Why would I just hand you what I bought with my hard-earned money?” Yoongi scrunches his nose, tone sharper than what he intended.

“But you still haven’t taught me,” you murmur to placate yourself and dissuade yourself from the delusion that Yoongi would even exert such an effort for you because of course — why would he do that for you?

You have an inkling that you’re being irrational for all the wrong reasons, perhaps even projecting your need to be looked after… by him.

Yoongi notices your mood that turned sour quickly, the silence between you becoming loaded. He didn’t mean to be that blunt. “I don’t think you’re even old enough to have your driving permit,” he adds in consolation, voice considerably softer.

You snicker lowly, still looking at your feet with your arms crossed. “But I’m old enough to backpack whenever you need me to carry shit that can’t fit in your carrier.”

He immediately groans at your comeback, his furrowed eyebrows mirroring yours. “You’re so stubborn.”

“You’re a hypocrite,” you retort, knowing for a fact he’s known how to drive even before he was eligible for permits and licenses and whatnot.

Yoongi takes one, two seconds to himself to regain his composure, clearing his head in the process. You’re still not looking at him and you’re pouting and you don’t even notice the latter, making him crack a small smile.

“I will teach you next week.”

“Oh my-…”

He cuts you off, raising his hand in emphasis. “Provided that you listen to everything I say and wear full gear at all times. You clearly don’t have a job yet-…”

“Ouch.”

“And I don’t have the extra money to buy full gear for myself, so what you’ll do is bundle up with your padded coat and the thickest jeans you have,” Yoongi enunciates every word, eyes keenly on you. They’re too wide and alert, you actually feel like listening to him.

“You go on rides wearing your pajamas.”

“Just say ‘thank you, Yoongi’.”

“You haven’t done anything yet,” you trail off, head tilting in confusion.

You’ve had a million conversations like this with Yoongi before but of different fonts; worn, familiar, and warm.

“Thank you, Yoongi,” he mouths, nodding at you to do the same. He won’t stop until you utter them back to him, and you know you won’t go home either without giving him your gratitude as you always do.

“Thank you, Yoongi,” you relent, the grin that breaks through your lips being infectious enough that he laughs lowly to himself.

He exhales all the worries he has and could possibly ever have seeing you ride the motorcycle (or for you yearning to do everything that he does), grasping at whatever sanity he has left from looking after you.

“You can have the helmet.”

( ♡ )

Yoongi knows the ins and outs of your home.

He’s been at your house too much to the point that your mom already gave him a spare key and nobody batted an eye about it. He has his own designated slippers at the entryway too, something you would only use in a hurry if you needed to sign off on a package.

Yoongi, for some reason unfathomable (not really; you can tell exactly why because your mom is an extremely warm and inviting person), also has the power of dibs on the food in your fridge. He’d put strips of masking tape with his name on food that’s neither brought in nor made for him in the first place.

It should be off-putting — the way that for too many yet too little reason, Yoongi has become a prominent figure in your life even if you didn’t ask him to. You should be peeved that you have to set up four plates more often that you set up only three; you should be annoyed at some point that when you wake up at random times through the night, you’re not totally alone to begin with.

You shouldbe angry at Yoongi to a degree because he’s in your life and you don’t get to have a say on how he stays in it. The only problem is that you’re not, and probably never will.

“Can’t sleep?” you mutter as you look up from your strikingly clear paper, seeing Yoongi strut across the floor with a casualness that only real occupants of the house should supposedly possess. He has his brows furrowed at you as if he didn’t expect to see you in your living room, scratching his head in wonder.

“Why are you up?”

“Stressed,” you sigh, giving up altogether in attempting to make yourself look busy. Yoongi drives by your fridge to get himself a can of beer, finally seating himself beside you on the floor.

“Stressed about what? I’m sure it’s not about studying,” he snorts, unsurprised at your paper and the clear lack of motivation behind it. You only roll your eyes at him and he has half a mind to not remind you to not do it so much, the frown in your face reminding him that you really were frustrated.

It is you to throw the occasional tantrum, but he remembers that it was only when you were young; when Namjoon would whisper gibberish to his ear and purposely not whisper to yours just so he could tease you, or when nobody would believe that you taught yourself how to ride a bike with no training wheels. You didn’t know how to do the latter at all, but what had made you throw a tantrum was that nobody believed you.

You notice Yoongi’s digs, of course. You notice each one of his more than unsubtle nods to your intelligence and whatnot, the shots at your intellect not flying over your head like he expected them to. You admit that you’ve never been that scholastic; you weren’t born a genius and you don’t try exactly hard either.

Yoongi’s only joking but you can’t help but to think that he’s pertaining to something deeper, his constant digs at your lack of a passion making you sluggish.

“We have to write this essay,” you answer simply, your tone straightforward and unwilling for banter but Yoongi bites anyway.

“But essays are the easiest,” he trails, looking at you the whole time as he takes a sip of his beer.

You exhale heavily because no matter what, he just can’t seem to get it. Yoongi knows where you’re coming from but he doesn’t know where you’re headed. As a matter of fact, you don’t know where you’re headed either. “We have to write an essay about where we see ourselves ten years from now.”

“But that’s still easy.”

“If it’s so easy, then go write it for me,” you snicker, leaning back with a huff. He constantly undermines you and although you own up to your striking mundaneness from time to time, it didn’t mean that you liked being looked down on. Yoongi’s too used to you being yourself, he gets taken aback when you grow sick of your own.

He gathers all his willpower, far from being sleepy unlike you who would’ve been lulled to sleep if only you weren’t dead-set on arguing with him. “You know what? I actually will,” he claps, handing you his beer. “Go hold this for me.”

Yoongi grips your pen for dear life like you hold his beer, his hand warm as he works from sheer determination alone (he’s not competing with anyone except for whatever expectation you have for him and your paper), while yours was cold just holding his drink.

You’ve been so quiet that he actually gets curious, turning his head to check to see if you’ve dozed off when actually, it’s just you eyeing the can.

“No one’s watching,” Yoongi breaks you out of your thoughts, carelessly shrugging. He cares and he’s far too concerned for you, but he figures that nothing would hurt you so long as he can grasp you. “It’s okay. You can have your first sip.”

You blink owlishly at him and when he jokes about taking it back, you take your first swig of beer in a panic. Yoongi only shakes his head in amusement, pausing his writing just to see the look on your face.

“One more?” he asks right after he sees you wince, the unbearable sweetness yet bitter, stinging aftertaste of the beer making you shudder.

You have the urge to wash off the taste with ice cold water (you’ll even drink from the tap because you’re so desperate), but you resist it just so you wouldn’t look like a weakling in front of him. You wave him off with a bitterness, upset that beer doesn’t taste like what you’ve always imagined it to be. “Just write my essay for me,” you mull over the taste in your tongue, in deep thought while you stare at Yoongi’s back ahead of you. “Do all beers taste that way?”

“Eh. Most of them do. You develop a taste for it later on,” he answers, taking the can back from you before drinking it himself. He looks too dedicated in writing your essay, only goading the curiosity in you to peek over his shoulder.

He knows you, both in heart and memory, because he shields your own paper from you when he sees your shadow hovering above him.

“Yoongi?”

“Hm.”

“I told you why I’m up. Why are you up?”

He’s silent entirely, the only indication that he heard your question being his hand pausing abruptly. Yoongi doesn’t answer, and you don’t ask again. “Don’t worry about it.”

You take his answer to heart, dozing off on the couch before you know it. You don’t remember a blanket being placed on you, nor can you remember preparing your backpack for school the next day.

Your paper’s neatly tucked into your portfolio bearing handwriting that’s clearly not yours, but with a sentiment that’s similar nonetheless. You read through everything quickly before even stepping towards your teacher, the tips of your fingers just as cold as Yoongi’s beer last night.

You’ve committed the paper into your memory, even until the last part with an excerpt you can’t forget despite having passed the paper already. You don’t know what to feel because it’s Yoongi who’s speaking for you, detailing that ten years from now, you will still be your mother’s daughter and your brother’s sister.

He wrote your essay either for you or in behalf of you, and you can’t tell which one is better.

Yoongi, who knows the ins and outs of your home and the peaks and troughs of your heart, writes in clear handwriting — Ten years from now, I will still be Yoongi’s rock.

( ♡ )

Surprisingly, Yoongi hasn’t been around that much lately.

Even Namjoon (who you consider as his Siamese twin) is clueless to why his friend hasn’t been hanging out with him lately to do either everything or nothing, confused because they’re enrolled to the same classes all the way to the same part-time jobs, yet Yoongi’s been mostly unavailable.

When Yoongi is, however, he doesn’t speak at all about his previous absences. He comes as if he’s never disappeared a few times before that, his evasion to talk about his presence being apparent even if you’ve asked him directly.

You’re getting used to his new routine of hanging out with you only when the both of you are free, no longer moving mountains for both of your schedules to line up. He’s more present this month than he was at the last, the criteria for it being how many times you bump into him in your own home.

Despite all odds and evens though, Yoongi can’t get used to your silence. He knows you hold grudges longer than your brother, and the last time that he checked, he knows you’ve already let go of your annoyance for him suddenly being unavailable without any explanation.

It’s late, only the two of you are awake in the living room, there’s ten scratch tickets on the table for you to share, and he’s even gotten you your own glass to which he’ll put a controlled amount (a grand total of two long sips) of his own beer in. You’re not stressing about an essay this time, but the unconscious pout on your face is still the same.

“You’re awfully quiet.”

The frown on your face only goes deeper at being found out, the scratch of your lucky coin being the only clear thing that Yoongi hears.

“My best friends want to have this slumber party,” you sigh, more upset about what you’ve just uttered than you are happy about the cash prize you’ve just won.

Yoongi takes what you say at face-value, groaning at his third straight loss for the night. “That’s great. Wear cute pajamas, snap a couple of polaroids, don’t be the first to fall asleep and last to wake up, and just keep a pocket knife with you when you’re going out by yourself.”

The awe (and slight concern) over what he said should roll in any time now.

You should be comforted at Yoongi’s words because they’re supposed to ease the swirl of your stomach, even if what he just said is a repackaged version of what your family said before. You should let go of your worries because Yoongi, of all people, says that it’s supposed to be great.

Instead, you feel neither of what you think Yoongi wants you to.

“Was it something I said?” he mumbles after some time, turning his nose up at you as he tries to retrace his words. “I have an extra pocket knife you can borrow if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“We’re gonna be talking about boys, Yoongi,” you screw your eyes shut, sighing into the palms of your hands with a heaviness. “We’re gonna talk about crushes and experiences and all that.”

He shudders at that, his reaction mirroring Namjoon’s when you tried opening up to him. You get your brother’s reaction to a degree, of course, because you feel as if you’d be disgusted too if the roles were reversed. You want to talk about it with your mom too, but at the end of the day, she’s your parent and you just can’t talk about anything and everything with her.

Yoongi’s your next plausible option.

“Do you want some ice cream right now? You know what, I’ll buy you-…” Yoongi tries to evade the topic altogether, his attempt of escaping feeble as you drag him down by his hoodie.

“I haven’t had my first kiss yet.”

“Heh.”

Yoongi shrugs at that, regaining his words when you deadpan at him. “So? What about it?”

You starfish on the floor at that out of frustration, the whine you’ve been bottling up coming out in the open because as usual, Yoongi doesn’t get it. “I-I’m probably the only one in my grade who hasn’t kissed someone yet! I can’t just lie carelessly because obviously, they’ll ask around.”

“So?” Yoongi chuckles, his breeze towards your state shocking you. “What’s it to them if you haven’t had your first kiss?”

“You don’t get it,” you grit through your teeth, crossing your arms so hard that it feels hard to inhale.

“I’m pretty sure I do,” he sing-songs, drinking the last of his beer. When you’re not looking though, he plans to either drink or chuck the remainder of your share because he doesn’t want you to develop a taste for it.

The anger you have for Yoongi bubbles up once again, the itch in your throat unbearable. You’re presented with the age gap between you once more, along with the raging emptiness in you that Yoongi’s reached so far and you’ve reached so little.

“You don’t get it because you’ve had all of these experiences when you were younger than my age right now,” you snap, although you don’t look at him when you do. If you do look at him though, you’ll only be reminded of how a face like his could have everything in this world — even a first kiss you’ve never had.

“Yeah, and so?” he knits his brows, growing defensive. You weren’t lying at all, but he still feels a little offended at the dig. He’s not not proud of it, but with the way you say it, it’s like you want him to burn in shame,

“Stop saying so,” you angrily mumble in frustration, a little breathless because you still don’t ease up on crossing your arms.

Yoongi straightens his posture, staring you down with his jaw set. He’s stern as he is, nostrils flaring in irritation. “No, Y/N. I’m genuinely asking — so what? What’s it to you if I had my first kiss at a younger age? What about it if everyone else in your grade has kissed someone and you haven’t? It’s not the end of the world.”

“I-I don’t know! It’s just unfair!” you let up, yielding to both the facts that Yoongi’s right with it not being the end of the world, and that you’re still entitled to feeling upset.

“Instead of spending time obsessing over your first kiss, maybe I don’t know, try being productive? You’re heading to college soon and you haven’t even thought of a career,” Yoongi goes off on you, making you roll your eyes automatically. There he goes again with the great big push of trying to push you into your supposed passions in life. “Someone else’s luck doesn’t mean it’s already your misfortune.”

“But it is.”

You say it so definitively, you almost convince him. You have your principles and so does Yoongi, but not everyone else. You have your principles yet you don’t have the luck. You’re not getting anywhere in life just like Yoongi or anyone else who was remotely born into wealth, no matter how quiet or obvious.

You can’t pursue something that interests you in the slightest without thinking what would come out of it. You can’t think of a degree and a course you’ll stick with, enough to do for the rest of your life because the only other option is to fail completely if you don’t. You have no plan and no passion and you don’t know if you’ll ever amount to anything to anyone at all.

By all means, you don’t agree with Yoongi this time. Someone else’s luck is your misfortune, in the same way that his first kiss doesn’t mean that it’s yours.

The sidetrack to your argument is a closed case already, judging by your downcast gaze. “I just have to put myself out there, that’s all. My first kiss doesn’t even have to mean anything. I just want to have it,” you admit, shoulders relaxing.

“Don’t,” Yoongi groans, the opposite of you as his whole body tenses.

He thinks that you don’t get him at all.

“What do you meandon’t?”

Your argument’s long-over (atleast you thought it was) but Yoongi’s getting more agitated by the minute, the disbelief on his face throwing you off. “Don’t do things just because you feel like you have to! Are you even hearing yourself right now?”

“I don’t want to be left behind, Yoongi! That’s all I’m trying to get at,” you raise your hands in surrender, shrugging thoughtlessly — it makes him want yell into a paper bag in exasperation. “I don’t want to be picked last. I don’t want to not be wanted.”

Yoongi exhales, screwing his eyes shut. It stays silent like that for a little while; him calming himself down, and you scratching your tickets. The calm doesn’t stay for long because you open your mouth carelessly, again.

“Can you be my first kiss?”

“Are you insane?”

“Ugh.”

You go back to your fourth scratch ticket, pouting in disappointment. You’re unfazed about the win that’s probably the largest sum you’ve had ever since you started doing the lottery.

You’re upset and you’re sick in the stomach but you stay silent like you never asked Yoongi to be your first kiss; it’s like you haven’t indirectly admitted to him that you love him enough, more than so, to want him to be your first.

You’re about to scratch the final ticket when Yoongi juts his hand out, fingers barely brushing yours to stop you.

“On second thought, don’t scratch that. Just keep it.”

“Because you want to turn me into a hoarder too?” you snicker, heeding his suggestion regardless.

“Because I’m not going to be right about everything,” Yoongi mumbles, looking at you with a solemnness you can’t decipher.

You try until the solemnness turns into pity.

“Still don’t want to be my first kiss?”

Yoongi softly laughs to your face, smiling as he lets you down — whether easily or harshly, you can’t tell.

“You already know what I’m going to say.”

( ♡ )

You’d like to think that you’re not kept in the dark about most things.

You already know that although your mom hasn’t had any relationships since your dad left, she still has plenty of suitors. Some of them are the reason why you have random food deliveries in the middle of the dinner that she’s already cooked, some have sucked up to her by getting you and Namjoon gifts.

You know about Namjoon’s growing love for football, even with the lessons he takes in secret because he didn’t want to trouble your mom for the money. It’s why he does his part-time job and why you’re looking for one anyways. You don’t want nor need much, so you almost always give him the remainder of your allowance by the end of each week.

Yoongi, on the other hand, you don’t know much about. You know that he’s an only child with a doting mom who works overseas and a rich but emotionally unavailable dad at home, and that’s about it. His home life is synonymous with yours, considering that your four walls have become an extension of his.

Maybe you’ve become too lenient on him — either that, or he’s become too disrespectful. It’s at times like these where your house is not his home, sickeningly so that you don’t want it to be yours either.

Yoongi is a sight to behold as he makes out with a half-naked girl on your bed, in your room. Your room has never been the neatest but with everything going on, it feels that it’s become the dirtiest that it’s ever been. Your house slippers are on the floor even if you always leave them by the entryway, and your sheets are a mess despite being one of the only things you try to keep folded in the room.

You’re angry, too much to the point that the words get caught in your throat. They catch onto bile and venom and everything at once, the strain in your voice heard when you yell.

“What the fuck?!”

Yoongi and the girl, whom you figure out to be Hyewon that he’s shared his first kiss with, jolt in unison. Hyewon’s scared shitless while Yoongi’s annoyed to death, the grunt he lets out pricking your ears further. “Sorry, sorry. She’s my best friend’s sister. She’s so annoying,” he drags you out of your room before he even gives you the entitlement to storm out of there in a fit of rage, seeing red the longer that he seems upset at you.

“What the fuck was that, Yoongi?” you grit through your teeth, the moment of you seeing red turn into white because you’re so frustrated that you could actually cry. Your chest’s heavy, not only out of rage, but out of everything that’s built up in the course of years.

“Can you keep it down?” Yoongi seethes, pursing his lips. “What, would you rather see us do it in the living room?”

“In the — what? Who do you think you are? This isn’t even your house, why are you bringing these girls here?” you point an accusing finger at him yet he doesn’t back away, his annoyance for you only growing tenfold.

He’s in the wrong no matter which way you look at it yet he doesn’t realize it, the epiphany that Yoongi genuinely thinks he’s in the right for doing this to you making your skin burn in fire.

“This is literally the first time I’ve ever done this! I can’t bring her back to my place, my dad has guests over!”

“So your smartest idea is to fuck someone in my bed?”

“Oh, you’re welcome. It’s the most action your four walls have ever seen,” he spits sarcastically, eyes narrowing at you. It takes little effort for him to dig up what you came to him for in worry and it terrifies you. The facet of Yoongi who had sternly told you that it was okay to be left behind if it means getting what you deserve, resembling nothing like him at the moment.

“I can’t believe you!” you whisper as you tremble, the tears pricking at the corner of your eyes. “I told you that in confidence.”

“In confidence? It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that you’re not exactly a catch, Y/N.”

You clench your jaw so hard that it hurts, you ball your fists so tightly that it stings.

You leave your home without saying another word.

Namjoon’s panicked.

He came home a little later than usual because he had maximized the life out of his soccer lessons, only getting the signal to leave when the lights were turned off. He was only slightly worried at the first place because he was supposed to cook dinner for the both of you, but he placated himself by realizing that you’re not the baby that he still thinks you are — you could cook dinner for yourself if you were hungry already.

He thinks nothing of it. In fact, he just makes a quick stop at the convenience store so the both of you could indulge in a liter of ice cream without your mom urging to leave some for another night. You could think of a recipe from scratch (and it almost always works out at the end), so Namjoon walked in fully thinking he’ll get to sniff whatever concoction you have.

Except, he walks into a completely dark house, and that’s when he panics.

He can’t find your slippers by the entryway and you’re not in your room either. You’re not at the other convenience store hunched over taking your chances on scratch tickets, and you’re not out on the street either going people-watching.

The panic rises in him the more that Namjoon grasps this is the first time that this has ever happened and he doesn’t know why. He’s always made an effort to be absorbed into both your personal and academic affairs, and as far as he knows, you’re neither in a sleepover nor on a field trip somewhere.

Namjoon thinks it’s his fault someway somehow, and the guilt can’t fully dissipate from him until he sees you.

“Hey, Yoongi,” he breathlessly gasps the moment his friend answers, the latter being surprised because he thought it was you who was calling him after what happened awhile ago.

It’s his fault and he’s realized that hours too late, and the selfish part of him thinks that it’s you calling at ten in the evening begging for forgiveness.

“What’s up, man? It’s late,” he wonders out loud, thinking for a second if they were too much of the Siamese twins that you tease them to be because he can’t think of a rational reason why Namjoon would call him at this time of night.

Namjoon raggedly exhales, running a hand through his hair. “Yeah, sorry about that. I’m just wondering if you’ve seen Y/N by any chance?”

Yoongi’s heart drops so loudly that Namjoon thought for second that his friend had hung up on him, his urgency being shared the moment that he asked.

“What? Y/N isn’t home?” Yoongi asks in disbelief, immediately being filled with anxiety and disbelief. Just awhile ago, the two of you were arguing outside of your room. He did hear you leave, but he had fully expected for you to be back hours ago. He’s wracked with guilt all over, the drop in his chest amplified by the pit in his stomach.

“She’s not. Practice ran late and I-I know she’s responsible so I didn’t hurry home,” Namjoon recalls, being more and more frazzled by the second. “She left her phone here, and mom isn’t here either because she’s visiting my grandparents, a-and I don’t want to call her because I know she’ll be worried, a-and-…”

Yoongi interrupts him, the tremble in his fingers only enabling him to dig his nails into his palm deeper. “I’m coming over. Let’s look for her together.”

It barely takes a minute for the both of them to come together, not even exchanging any pleasantries with each other before Yoongi steps on the gas.

Namjoon’s filled with guilt, the type that only a sibling could carry as a burden. He thinks he was too selfish — too accustomed to pulling your own weight that it must have given you the impression that you had no other choice but to. Whatever it was that made you leave out of the blue, Namjoon thinks he could’ve done more. He should’ve came home and made you dinner as promised, for starters. He’s guilty over the fact that he’s the only close familial male figure in your life and he let this happen, as he makes Yoongi put his headlights on high-beam, scanning for anyone that looks remotely like you.

Yoongi, on the other hand, is filled with a guilt he can’t even begin to explain. It corrodes him from the inside-out in realization that he’s to blame for your sudden disappearance, the fact that Namjoon comes to him first to help find you not helping at all. If only your brother knew what he had done to you, he’s positive that he’ll be on the receiving end of a punch — what gets him more is that Yoongi wouldn’t blame him at all.

They see you in the bus stop two cities away, dressed in the same clothes you ran out with.

Namjoon’s relieved beyond compare while Yoongi’s fuming, his hands tucked inside his jacket to prevent himself from squeezing you into an embrace; neither of you deserve it.

There’s an underlying anger within Namjoon, one that lies behind the back of his throat as he checks you over for any injuries. The two of you walk ahead to Yoongi’s car while he himself trails behind, his heart significantly calmer than it was the past hour, yet nowhere near normal.

“Wanna tell me what you did?” your brother hums, trying to exhale the worry that’s embedded into him with each squeeze he gives around your shoulders.

“Went to the convenience store, bumped into my friends, then we took this impromptu roadtrip to go to the night market, then we all had our first actual shot of liquor and not just beer, my friend who owns the car turned out to be a lightweight, and now everyone just has to commute home,” you narrate in recollection, squeezing Namjoon back to try and ground him.

“Okay,” he answers simply, nodding. “Wanna tell me what happened before you did all those things?”

The breathless chuckle that leaves you is empty, void of any amusement at all. You smile nonetheless, unable to placate both yourself and Namjoon. “Nope.”

You arrive in silence to Yoongi’s car, the words unsaid between the three of you generating more tension than your brief disappearance itself.

Yoongi opens the front door for you, but you settle for sitting in the backseat.

#HOW R WE FEELING TARGET AUDIENCE!!! :O #yoongi imagine #yoongi oneshot #yoongi oneshots #yoongi series #yoongi angst #yoongi angst imagine #yoongi fluff #yoongi x reader #yoongi x y/n #yoongi au #min yoongi imagine #min yoongi scenario #yoongi fanfic #yoongi x you #bts yoongi imagine #bts yoongi x reader

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billsjum6ie · 6 months

Note

Tom with a daughter who’s literally his twin in the 2000s. Like this is present day and everyone talks abt how she is his reincarnation of him in the 2000s. he prob had her young if he passed on his old style to her but regardless the similarities are uncanny 😜 Thank uu

(Oh my god, that actually sounds so cute. I hope you like it! )

" She really is a younger you ! "

Dad!Tom

He is really proud, if I'm honest

He's always flexing how much of an inspiration he is for his daughter, especially if he had her in a young age

Probably mentions this with every chance he gets, actually

Jokes aside tho, he'd be so pleased and happy with himself

The band had plenty of free time after their last show, so they decided to go over to Tom's house, drink some beers ( a dirty martini for Bill, please ) and watch some football. Before the match started, they were chatting about all kinds of things and , since Halloween was nearby , the talk switched to costumes pretty fast.

" I really liked your last year's costume, Bill. "

Georg said, taking a sip of his beer. Bill laughed, sitting back on the couch, throwing his one arm over the back.

"The Ariel one? I think so too! It was one of my best. "

He answered, taking a sip of his drink as well. He shrugged his shoulders.

" I don't think I've ever had a bad costume, to be honest. "

He added, making Tom roll his eyes.

" Of course you'd say that. "

Bill turned to look at him, a small smirk on his lips.

" it's not bad to speak the truth once in a while, you know. "

He answered, before turning to the TV again.

" my favorite costume is the one my daughter had when she was 10. "

Tom continued and everyone's attention was on him. It was Bill's turn to roll his eyes.

" of course, what else would it be? "

He commented, laughing a bit.

" I mean, why not? It was the time when she started experimenting with her style and all!"

Tom said before standing up. Gustav groaned.

" Here comes the photo album. "

He said, changing the channel.

" Hey! I was watching that! "

Bill said, annoyed, but Gustav chose to ignore him. Not many minutes had passed when Tom was back, a huge photo album in his hands.

" look! "

He said while sitting on the couch and opening it on his legs. The other three wanted to seem annoyed, since they've seen these pictures a million times before, but couldn't resist looking. Their smiles gave them away. They were actually so happy with Tom and his family. When he found the right picture, he pointed at it.

" I think it's obvious who was her inspiration for this look. "

He said, making everyone slightly laugh. It was a picture of his daughter, 3 years ago. She had on an oversized t-shirt and some jeans that were huge on her. They were basically touching the ground, while she was wearing some white sneakers. A beanie could be seen under her hat, that was almost covering her eyes entirely. In her hand she was holding a pumpkin bucket that said " Trick or treat! ". She had a small white guitar strapped on her body and from some videos they've seen ( a million times, again ) , they remembered the way she was walking like a penguin. But Tom couldn't help himself but remind them that.

" I remember that night as if it was yesterday. We were talking about her costume and what she wants to be and she just went " I want to look like you ". I didn't really think this through until she showed me a picture that she found in one of my photo albums of me from the early 00s."

He had a sweet smile on his face as he turned to look at the other three.

" of course we immediately went shopping and I got her exactly what she needed ! I remembered pretty well the whole preparation and on Halloween she was just a little me from the 00s walking around, like a penguin! "

He pointed at them.

" you guys liked that too, just admit it! "

He said, laughing, making everyone nodd.

" we actually did. It was so sweet! "

Bill said before they continued looking at the rest of the pictures.

From that one costume till today, his daughter started experimenting regarding her style

Slowly she became a mini 00s Tom overall, from her baggy clothes, to her taste in music and the obsession and love for playing the guitar, that slowly started to appear when she watched videos of her father on stage

Tom was always so supportive and happy with this change, even though it was something he never expected to happen, since times had changed and he thought his daughter would want to be part of every new fashion trend

But he always reminded her to not act the way he did when he was younger

Sometimes these conversations happened when they were joking around

Other times though, they were taken pretty seriously

" you know I love the way you found yourself in this style right? "

He once said while they were sitting on the couch, watching a movie. His daughter turned to him, nodding.

" of course. I remember how happiness was written all over your face when I first mentioned that I wanted to try this! "

She said,making them both laugh.

" yeah, that's one of my favorite moments of my life. It's really important to me, that you're so inspired by me. But you should be careful. "

His daughter immediately grew serious as she stopped the movie and turned to look at Tom.

" what do you mean, dad? "

She asked, and Tom sighed, leaving the bowl of popcorn on the table in front of them.

" I love the way you dress like me, and decided to learn to play the guitar, but never, ever act the way I did. "

He turned to her, his eyes looking right at hers.

" I wanted to live the life of a Rockstar. Smoking and drinking from a young age, having sex like there's no tomorrow, with different girls every time. I'm sure you've heard all of those stories already. "

The girl nodded, sitting back on the couch.

" Always take care of yourself and others. I know this may sound fun to a young person but it doesn't always have good outcomes. So please, be careful. And if anyone ever tries to give you a hard time, always come to me so we can fix things together. Okay? "

He said, but before she could answer.

" and if you ever try any of the things I mentioned, don't be scared to tell me. I won't be mad. Alright? "

His daughter gave him a smile and a nodd.

" I promise you dad, I'll be careful. "

Tom smiled back, hugging his daughter and giving her a slight kiss on the cheek.

" that's my girl. "

Let's just say he's always there for her (just wanted to add this here)

Other than that, the guys always point out how she is his " reincarnation " from the early 00s, just to see him beam with happiness

They always compliment the way he's teaching her stuff and how she grows up the right way with Tom as her father

And of course Tom always tries to act casual but in the end he fails

The boys were once again over at Tom's house. They were talking about the new album and what has to follow on the tour for its promotion, when their talk is interrupted by Tom's daughter who comes out of her room, ready to go for a walk.

" Dad, I'm leaving! "

Tom turned to look at her. As always, she was wearing an oversized white t-shirt and a grey sweatshirt jacket that went down to her knees. Her blue jeans were sagging and covering her white sneakers, while her head was covered by a beanie and a hat. Just like that Halloween costume.

" be careful ! Text me when you arrive at your friend's house okay? "

She turned to him and smiled, putting one earphone on.

" I will. Hope you have fun with the preparations! "

And with that, she was out the door.

" wow. She really is a younger you! "

Bill said, smiling at the door. Tom smiled too, looking back at the guys. His smile giving away how hard he was trying to hold back his bragging. Bill rolled his eyes.

" don't be so cocky! "

Tom just laughed at this, before giving his answer.

" yeah, she is. She even mentioned that she wants to get her hair done as a birthday present. "

Tom said, scribbling down at the piece of paper in front of him.

" which hairstyle did she choose? "

Georg asked, even though they all knew the answer. And Tom's smile gave it away before his lips did.

" dreadlocks. "

#tokio hotel #kaulitz twins #tokio hotel fanfic #tokio hotel imagine #tokio hotel x reader #tom kaulitz #tom kaulitz imagines #tom kaulitz tokio hotel #tom kaulitz fanfic #tom kaulitz fluff

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barcalover86 · 9 months

Note

Heyyyyy

I was wondering if u can make a story abt reader has daddy issues like her dad is abusive and really mean with her? Also how her mom does care at all and that she only wants reader to be perfect and she thinks that she’s a disappointment but when Gavi (your boyfriend) came to dinner at readers parents house he was disgusted by how they treat u?

It will mean so much if u write this bc I have dealt w something simular

Daddy issues

I'm so sorry that you are going through this! Stay strong! Much love to you.

If you don't like this type of stuff or if you are sensible! Do NOT read it!

I'm sorry for everyone that has to deal with this. NO ONE deserves it!

"Are you sure you want to meet them?"

"Yes, cariño. I really wanna know your parents." Gavi told you.

"Then today at 6 it will be alright."

Pablo was begging you to introduce him to your parents for some weeks. You knew since the beginning that this is not a good idea, but Gavi sometimes doesn't stop until he gets what he wants.

Now you've got home and you went directly to your parents to ask if Pablo can join you to your dinner tonight.

They found out months after that you were in a relationship with a football player and they didn't like this much. He was too good for you, and you won't be anything in this life by his side.

"Are you that stupid, y/n!?" said your father.

You sighed, knowing that this was going to be a long talk.

"Please, papa. I already told him that he can come."

"Don't 'papa' me! You don't deserve to call me your father, understood?"

"Yes."

"I can't believe how you invited someone over without asking me first!"

"You would have said no! He really wants to meet you. Do you think that it is also my pleasure? I don't want to eat with you!"

"Don't you dare talk with me like that! I'm your father, you have to respect me!"

"Oh, so now I'm your father then?"

Right now, he got super angry and started to throw things on the floor. You flinched a little, which made him chuckle sarcastically.

"10 minutes. That's all I'm asking for." you finally said.

He looked at you for some seconds before agreeing.

"Only because I really wanna see how much money does this kid has."

You rolled your eyes before going to your room texting Pablo that you talked with your father and he agreed. You didn't say much details.

Gavi knew you had a complicated relationship with your parents, but you never told him how hard and bad it is. You never told him the nights that you would cry because he would come drunk home and start to shout at you for no reason. How your mother was afraid to stop him. She never took your side. She was barely there for you.

After some time she started to say bad things to you. How you disappointed her in this life and how you will be homeless after she will die.

It was really hard, but you were strong. Every time you dealt with it. Tonight is not going to be different.

Gavi was asking you what to wear and after some good minutes spent together, you chose a nice and perfect outfit for a family dinner.

You got dressed into a pretty black dress.

When Pablo knocked at your door, you smiled and opened it for him.

"Hola, amor!" he said before giving you a sweet kiss on your lips. "You are so beautiful, cariño."

You smiled at his compliment before guiding him to your parents.

You mouthed a "be nice" to them when your boyfriend introduced himself, and you hoped that this will be a calm night.

Your father was really nice to Pablo and your mother as well. Of course, they were acting. They only wanted his money.

"I'm sorry if my daughter is sometimes.." he looked at you "a disappointment."

Pablo look at you then at your father before raising his eyebrows.

"What!? No, she is not a disappointment. She is the perfect girl for me. There is no need to be concerned about this stuff. She treats me so well."

Pablo tried to make you say something, but you didn't. Why were you silent?

"I really like you boy and trust me when I say this. You really deserve better."

Gavi was shocked. He held your hand before talking again.

"Why do you say that?"

"She just can't do nothing. Stays all the time in her room, isn't productive. Doesn't have any talents and she is completely useless."

"How can you say such things to your daughter, señor!?"

"I just want to help you get rid of her."

"What? I don't want to get rid of her at all! And just so you know, she is-"

"Stop it, Pablo." you said before he could continue.

"No, I won't stop he can't talk-"

"It's alright, ok? Just eat." you said and he was shocked, confused..and hurt.

How could your father talk to his daughter like that. He couldn't stand it anymore, so he stood up, held your hand and said that you two are going to his home.

"What, Pablo, no-"

"Oh, yes. You can't stay here."

"You are not taking my daughter anywhere! She will stay here with her parents!" your mother spoke for the first time tonight.

"Oh, you are not her parents! You can't talk about her like that in front of me!"

When you stood up to leave with your boyfriend, you accidentally hit a glass of wine and it spilled all over the white table. Your parents got angry.

"See!? She is no good! She can't do anything right! If you leave then you won't be my daughter! I'll forget you, you piece of shit!"

"She was never your daughter, señor. Never!"

And with that, Pablo took you to his house.

You didn't want to cry. You wanted to be strong..

It was hard to leave your parents. They were still the people who gave you food and learned how to walk. They weren't good people, but leaving the house where you grew.. it hit you hard.

"They don't deserve you, cariño. I'm so, so sorry. You had to tell me-"

"It's alright, I swear. I'm used to it."

"Please, tell me what did they do to you. All this years where I couldn't be by your side. What did they do to my sweet girl?"

You told everything. All your problems with him. He was by your side, telling you how he loves you and how you are not a disappointment at all. How all they said to you all this years, wasn't true. Not even a bit.

You cried in his arms, speaking your heart to him.

Since then, Pablo promised himself to be there with you. He took you to his family and showed you how true parents are.

They treated you just like their second daughter, and after some time, when you managed to heal, leaving your parents and finding your family was the best decision you've ever done.

"I love you.."

"I love you too, my sweet girl!"

No one is a disappointment!!!!!!

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liannelara-dracula · 11 months

Text

Shu Sakamaki in Real Life HCS

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

Prompt

Requests are open

Rules

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

🎻I probably won’t have much to say because I find his character to be ugh sometimes but I can’t imagine not creating hcs abt this mf.

🎻But it is difficult to come up with things about him, ngl.

🎻Anyhow, if you guys have seen these irl hcs before you’ll know I’m mostly sharing with you my general thoughts, and formulated opinions on this character so here we go!

🎻Okay, so I’m sure we all know he’s the heir and a prince of the vampire kingdom (I know its weird.) And I just have to say this because I don’t say it enough, I really feel like he acts differently in the demon world because he knows his dad will be mad.

🎻So you can expect Shu to be much more expressive as he is the heir, he represents his father and so he needs to be “lively”.

🎻 That being said, he attends gatherings, banquets, and many other events that his father may want him to.

🎻I will say that when he is in the demon world it is much different as he doesn’t act like himself.

🎻Apart from him is still the same in the sense that he is still a pervert.

🎻I mean we know he’ll be with low-ranking vampires or whatever just to get some.

🎻 After all, he has somewhat of an ego even if he doesn’t show it.

🎻So you know he most definitely does believe that because he is the heir he can move from one girl to the next with no strings attached.

🎻All for his advantage of course.

🎻Also speaking of his royalty life I really want to mention the fact that he is very annoyed by all the attention the girls give him.

🎻He literally can’t wait till he goes back to the human world where it's much quieter.

🎻However as a royal he does enjoy the theatre because he can hear classical music.

🎻In fact, he loves it most when he can watch the ballet performances.

🎻If there’s one thing he loves most it’s watching girls do ballet.

🎻He loves watching them practice especially because you know he’s a thigh guy. Apart from being an ass man.

🎻This is honestly where he might take an interest in a girl who's probably a dancer.

🎻I’ve literally made an aesthetic about this here.

🎻And you can read a lot about how he is at school in the demon world here.

🎻Oh btw he sleeps in only his underwear, that’s just how I see it. (and it's actually canon, I was laughing when I found out I was right.)

🎻I will say that he doesn’t laugh very often, he’ll just have a chuckle that makes anyone uncomfortable but when he full-on laughs it's so fucking rare.

🎻And it freaks out almost anyone, it even got Yui.

🎻He is such an ass I feel like he trolls anyone in, anyway, he can.

🎻His hair is so tangled and I bet he doesn’t wash it that often because he’s lazy

🎻He smells like cotton/linen and a bit of dust.

🎻The best actor to play him would be Toby Regbo.

🎻However the model I found on Pinterest is also a great representation of what he’d look like.

🎻In terms of attitude he really reminds me of Robert Pattinson because he trolls so much.

🎻The best way to bribe him is with steak, I swear it works every time.

🎻And I bet my entire ass that Reiji uses it for when he needs big favors.

🎻He loves to be comfortable so I feel like American Eagle, Hollister, Old Navy, and H&M are his go to.

🎻I know he loves cardigans so much so he’s probably extremely picky about the kind he buys.

🎻That’s why he only has three, this is actually canon, I believe it was in one of the game translations in Reiji’s route where he was looking for his jacket and asked Reiji. And Reiji told him it can’t be that hard to find since he has only three, lol.

🎻And idk why but I just feel like he miss places them all around the house.

🎻I also think he keeps so much junk under his bed.

🎻“Huh, I don’t remember that being there.”

🎻If he gets really hot, he just throws his cardigan under the bed.

🎻He once owned a cat, it's not that he went out of his way and bought one. It sorta followed him and so he started to take care of it a little. It lived outside mostly because Reiji wouldn’t tolerate it, but occasionally Shu kept the cat in his room.

🎻He has no idea where the cat went and whether or not it's alive since he hardly kept watch of it.

🎻Although he sometimes wonders where it went, and I think he liked the cat since she sometimes got into Reiji’s things. It was amusing to say the least.

🎻Forgets he puts his music sheets on his bed and ends up sitting on them.

🎻That’s why they’re always somewhat crumbled and folded.

🎻Never makes his bed, he just throws the blanket on and thanks to the butler the room is kept clean.

🎻Otherwise it’d end up like Ayato’s room, to which the butler can never keep up with.

🎻Because he loves music he has vinyl records, and countless CDs in some boxes he keeps under his bed.

🎻He keeps a couple of his favorite books which are in Latin.

🎻Something also tells me if he had a journal, he’d write only Latin because none of his brothers can.

🎻Because he used to be a cashier, he still has his name tag from then and his worker vest.

🎻He keeps in hidden in a corner of his closet.

🎻Speaking of which his closet is so empty and he literally has repeats of the same pants and shirts.

🎻It’s mostly because they were on a good sale.

🎻He will wear the same clothes for like three days or more and not even change out of them.

🎻Doesn’t brush his hair, just goes to school with bed head.

🎻Keeps his door locked so triplets don’t think about pranking him with some clown-related things since he has a fear of them. It's mostly because he’s learned that the hard way.

🎻It's also because he fears they may bring in a caterpillar.

🎻I could totally see Yui trying to feed a caterpillar and he’d flip out in panic and leave immediately.

🎻He never will admit to his fears and covers them up quite well because he wants no one to know that, especially a girl. lol.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

˗ˏˋ 𝑎𝑙𝑙 𝑚𝑦 𝑤𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑖𝑠 𝑜𝑟𝑖𝑔𝑖𝑛𝑎𝑙 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝐼 𝑑𝑜 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑜𝑤𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑎𝑐𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑠 ˎˊ˗ ©𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟔~Present

#diabolik lovers #anime #diabolik lovers headcanons #anime headcanons #dialovers #diahell #anime requests #shu sakamaki #sakamaki shuu #shuu sakamaki #diabolik lovers shuu #shu sakamaki moodboard #shu sakamaki aesthetic #diabolik lovers shu #sakamaki shu #dia lovers

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xsaiya · 6 months

Text

"everything's alright."

-tags: comforting! obanai x vitiligo! insecure! reader, angst fluff (mostly angst), hugs, re-assurance, suicidal thoughts (reader), mentions of sh, traumatizing flashback, reader has permanent scars on their face, platonic sanemi catches you trying to harm yourself, reader is known as the emotion hashira, daydreaming. (warning for triggers!)

-future work: uppermoon hc's + muzan (I PROMISE <3)

-plot: iguru had found you saying some bad shit abt yourself so he went to go talk with and comfort you. <3

-a/n: pls do not think bad abt yourself, or harm yourself. your perfect the way you are, there's no need to feel like shit abt yourself. <3 (pls do not steal my work as it is based on my own life)

-recommended song: cigarettes out the window - tv girl

life was hard, hard as fuck. you felt like everybody around your atmosphere hated you and wishes you'd just, well, die. thoughts ran through your head as you were balled up in a corner, grabbing fistful sizes of hair on the sides of your head, crying and sobbing, muttering bad shit abt yourself, like 'does he hate me? does he want me to die? should i even be alive right now?'. those thoughts ran through your head every single day and second, just no body noticed.

note being a hashira, that shit just adds another difficulty to your already fucked up life. your mind also had racing thoughts of your past, and what those bastards did.

(FLASHBACK STARTS NOW!)

huddled up in a corner while gripping the sides of your head, crying & trembling in fear as the tall, abusive figure stood right in front of you while kicking and hitting your already abused body. the man, also known as your dad, kept yelling things in your ears like 'your not my daughter! my daughter isn't a useless, annoying, ugly ass bitch!' as he continued to abuse you over and over again. and all you could do was tremble and cry in fear.

(FLASHBACK ENDS NOW!)

you just dug your head into your legs as you cried and cried, you had nobody, nobody at all, except for one person, the love of your life, obanai. he genuinely cared about you, checked to see if you were eating enough, drinking enough water, sleeping enough. all he did was worry & care abt you, which made you feel guilty, why did he care so much about you? aren't you supposed to be a worthless toy to throw around? not in his eyes.

but, from the corner of your eyes, you saw a blade, you just stared at it for continuous minutes and seconds before thoughts ran through your head. your heart told you 'don't do it, you'll regret it!' while your brain just said 'do it, fuck up your wrists, your worthless anyways.'

you reached out for the blade, grabbed it with a harsh grip, and pointed its sharp tip to your wrist while smiling and crying, still looking down. but before you could even think about doing such an act towards yourself, someone harshly grabbed your wrist, and threw the blade away from your intense grip.

"don't fucking do that shit." said sanemi, he was genuinely worried that you'd do such an act towards yourself if he didn't arrive in time.

"i-" you just stared at him, as if a staring contest occurred, but no, he was giving you that intense look of 'tell someone, talk to someone, get help.'

"you gotta get some help, yk what? i'm telling iguru, you need to get some help." those words replayed in your mind as if it were a track tape, you just sat on a couch near you, waiting for them to return, and they eventually did.

sanemi returned with a worried as fuck obanai. obanai rushed towards you, grabbed your wrist and inspected it thoroughly, asking questions, his anxiety boosted right through heaven's gates as he looked at you with a look of so much love & worry. this just made you cry, cried in appreciation & sadness, you actually for once felt like you could let it all loose around someone.

"hey, hey. it's alright, let it all out love," he hugged you so so tight

you sobbed and sobbed for hours and all he did was mutter sweet re-assurances in your ear as you berried your crying face into his welcoming shoulder.

"..everything's alright."

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rosemaryandarsenic · 2 years

Text

The Graduate

Gareth x fem!reader [abt 3k] A one shot, I might add more later? Best friends to lovers, summer, childhood, pining, crushes, a kiss. Reader and Gareth are both 18 in this, and Hawkins is “normal”, at least for them at this point. It’s graduation day, and there's a party to be had.

Warnings: Slight spicy content, mentions of smut, implied smut. Substance abuse. Minors DNI, 18+. Tried to keep reader looks general, but she’s plus sized :)

Inspired by Every Breath You Take by The Police (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OMOGaugKpzs)

Gareth sat at one of the picnic tables outside of Hawkins High, still clothed in his graduation cap and gown, cigarette in hand. The ceremony had ended hours ago, but he wanted to sit outside one last time. Its not like he would miss the place, but it felt like not saying goodbye was wrong somehow. So he sat, openly smoking a cigarette and chuckling to himself as he reminisced.

“Hey you.” Y/N said, wandering up to him with a smile.

She stole his cigarette from his hands, taking a drag.

“Hey yourself.” He chuckled, swiping the cigarette back playfully.

“Whatchya doin’?” She asked, hopping up on the table next to him.

He shrugged.

They sat together smoking for a bit, silently.

“You going to the party later?” Y/N broke the silence.

There was a graduation blast at Mark Cooks house that night, the whole school had been invited, including the “freaks”.

“Free booze, who can say no to that.” Gareth said, “Eddie’s picking me up at like, 7?”

Y/N nodded.

“You wanna come over first?” He elbowed her gently.

“Yeah,” she elbowed him back, “I’m just gonna wear that I have on. I don’t feel like going back home and dealing with my dad today.”

He shook his head, mockingly making a serious face. “You gotta change, no one will talk to you if you’re looking like that.”

Feigning indignation, Y/N threw her hand over her chest. “What? You’re telling me this now?”

“I was going to tell you this morning but I didn’t think you brought anything to change into, y’know?” He gestured to her outfit, a pretty blue sundress. “Gonna give Munson a nosebleed.”

She laughed loudly, turning pink. “Anyone could wear literal garbage bags and Munson would still be foaming at the mouth.”

“Anyone?” Gareth raised his eyebrows.

“Shut up.” She groaned, throwing him the bird.

He grinned, and flipped her off in return.

“Now I wanna change,” she mumbled, fiddling with the hem of her skirt.

He groaned internally, regretting saying anything. As much as he was right about Eddie’s horniness, he also secretly didn’t want her to change. The way her skirt was flipping in the wind was…distracting. If it wasn’t y/n, Gareth would be staring too.

“Nah, its fine. Promise.” He poked her knee, trying to lighten the mood.

She groaned and shifted, standing. “Fiiinee.”

Gareth hopped up, standing next to her before offering her his arm. “Lets get out of this shit hole before they decide we gotta stay another year.”

She laughed, taking his arm and skipping towards his car. “Please.”

…

They sat outside, waiting as Eddie’s van rumbled towards Gareth’s house. You could hear it a mile away, screeching, with Iron Maiden blaring from the open windows. He rolled up, pushing the passenger door open from the passenger side.

“Your chariot, Gareth the Great.” He yelled, glancing at Gareth before catching sight of Y/N. “M’lady.” He nodded, a little flush covering his cheeks.

Gareth hopped in, shoving aside the little pit of jealousy in his stomach. It’s just Eddie, he does this with everyone.

“Hey Eds!” Y/N said, pulling open the back door and climbing in, carefully situating herself in the back among the pillows and beer cans.

“Jesus, did you rob a liquor store on the way here?” She asked, waving at the bottles and packs of beer piled in the back.

“I’m 21 now, so I thought I’d pull a few favors.” Eddie laughed.

“A few.” Y/n rolled her eyes.

The drive to Mark’s house was short, thankfully, with Eddie’s driving. Y/N was used to it, but she clung to the door none the less, sliding around as he whipped around corners.

“Watch the goods,” Gareth mumbled, getting a raised eyebrow from Eddie before he glanced in the rearview mirror and saw Y/N tumbling around.

“Sorry y/n.” He said, sheepishly, slowing down a little.

They pulled into the gated community, and parked behind the crowd of cars parked in the long ass driveway leading the Cooks house. It was practically a mansion, with people sprawled in the lawn and on the porch, drinks in hand and music blaring.

Y/N spotted some of the girls from band, and waved happily as Robin’s gangly arms reached above the crowd, waving back.

“I’ll be back!” She said as she ran, jumping into robins hug and squealing as the group erupted in choruses of “CONGRATULATIONS!!”.

Eddie stood next to Gareth, watching Y/N run, and looking away hurriedly as her skirt rode up, exposing the dimples on the back of her thighs. Gareth didn’t turn away, eyes lingering a second longer at the exposed flesh and the way her legs rubbed together. The dress situation may be worse than I thought, he wandered to himself, as he tried not to stare at the pudge of her stomach and the way it curved into the slope of her hips.

“Stare any longer and I’m getting a bucket of cold water.” Eddie chuckled, ripping him out of his trance.

“Fuck.” Gareth muttered under his breath, giving Eddie the side eye.

“S’fine,” he said, “She didn’t notice.”

Gareth grunted, turning back towards the van. “You need help carrying any of this shit?”

Eddie’s attention easily shifted to unloading the van, and he handed Gareth several cases of beer to carry inside. Gareth made his way to the kitchen, where the party was starting to pick up as dusk fell. Mark was hovering there, red cup in hand, yelling as he jumped from group to group, already drunk.

‘HEY MAN” he hollered, grabbing Gareth’s shoulders as he set down the beer. “Grab a drink! Welcome! Is Y/N here with you?” He prodded.

Gareth tensed up, avoiding the question. “Thanks, she’s somewhere around.” He said, as he spotted her across the room, now hovering by Robin on the sofa. She was talking to Steve Harrington, animatedly waving her hands, eyes wide. Gareth grabbed a cup and quickly poured some red punch in, it smelled like acetone but he chugged it anyway. Watching her interact with other guys shouldnt bother him. We’re just friends, he chided himself. They have been since elementary school. He still remembered the day they met, the way she’d been hunched in the corner of the cafeteria with a book. Encyclopedia Brown, he’d mocked, as she looked up at him with a scowl. “If you’re too stupid to read books that are actually interesting, just say so.” She’d stated. He’d read the whole series that summer and they’d been friends ever since.

“Slow down there!” He came back to reality, as he heard a voice behind him. Eddie was behind him, looking slightly concerned as he’d watched Gareth angrily chug three cups full of punch.

“It’s not even nine yet, man.” Eddie laughed, bumping Gareth over as he reached over the punch bowl to hand someone a beer. Gareth nodded, feeling the effects hit him already.

The night rolled on, as everyone celebrated, games of beer pong lifting the mood as Madonna blared over the speakers. Y/n had gravitated to Eddie’s side by the pool, smoking a blunt as she watched the groups around her. Eddie was simultaneously dealing and smoking, his eyes sparkling as he weighed out a variety of drugs and pocketed cash.

She laid on his shoulder, head feeling hazy.

“You good?” He stopped, tapping her head as she sat there. She nodded.

“Too high for people.” She mumbled, and he laughed, letting her sit there.

“You want me to take a break? We can go dance.” He said.

She perked up. “Yes!” She jumped up to quick and stumbled.

“Whoa there,” Steve said a few feet away, reaching out for her arm.

“I got it, s’fine.” She giggled, and Steve rolled his eyes.

Grabbing her hand, Eddie led her inside where the music was loudest. Gareth sat on the carpet, back against the wall, nursing his own cup and watching as the room swirled.

“Gare bear!” Y/N hollered, seeing him and running over on wobbly legs. “Dance with us!” She twirled, reaching for Gareth and pulling Eddie with her other hand.

Gareth groaned, standing, and made his way toward the two as Y/N twirled more, her high making the music feel like it was coursing through her veins.

Eventually, Eddie grew bored, and nudged Gareth. “Watch this one,” he whispered in his ear, “I’m gonna go get some waters.” Gareth nodded, leaning back agains the wall as he watched y/n. Her hair had fallen loose along her back, free from the braid it had been in all day. There was a soft flush along her cheeks, eyes glassy and lips pink and parted softly as she smiled. Her body swayed to the music, skirt brushing around her thick thighs, neckline shifted down, exposing her chest just a little. Metal started to blare, and she yelled excitedly, dancing harder. Gareth felt his heart pound as she leaned back, singing along, carefree and passionate. He felt his cheeks grow hot at the sight of her tracing her hands down her body, eyes shut, blissful. Maybe he’s the one who’d get the nose bleed this time. The song ended, and she finally seemed to tire, slowing as she turned to him and sidled over.

“Hi.” She said breathlessly, leaning on him and panting a little from the movement.

“Hi.” He said, resisting the urge to wrap his arms around her waist and nuzzle his face into her neck. He could smell her perfume, and the traces of cigarettes and weed. She was so close to him, it would be so easy.

She sighed and he straightened his back, “maybe its time we take a break.” He laughed.

Y/N nodded, smiling. “ITS SO LOUD IN HERE.” She said, grabbing onto his arm.

He nodded, gesturing his hand towards the pool outside. She shook her head.

“I know a better place.” She whisper shouted into his ear, sending a shiver down his spine. Maybe it was the weed and the booze, but he could’ve sworn he heard a change in her tone.

“Lead the way.” He said back, grabbing her hand.

She pulled them both through the crowd, leading him further into the house and towards the stairs that led to the top floor of the house. A small sign lay crumpled on the stairs - NO GOING UPSTAIRS, it said. Clearly it was ineffective he thought as they clambered up.

“Y/N, what are you-“ Gareth started to say as she cut him off with a finger to his lips.

“Shhhhh.” She mumbled, dragging him down the hall towards one of the back rooms.

He felt his palms get sweaty. Everyone knew what the upstairs is for at this sort of event. Its not exactly a secret that couples would sneak upstairs for some….alone time. His stomach fluttered, and he shoved it down. This was his best friend, she couldn’t possibly be… could she?

“Give me a hand.” She whispered, as she pulled him into what he recognized as the bathroom and shut the door. “Open the window.”

He obeyed, trying to cover the way his fingers were trembling a little. She looked so pretty and flushed, and his mind wanted to go to some places it should not go. Not while she was so close, in that dress. He winced as the window creaked, sliding open.

Y/N perched herself on the window sill and slung one leg over, looking back at him.

“Right behind you.” He whispered, trying not to heave as she swung her other leg over, revealing a pair of white lace panties underneath. She disappeared through the window and he followed her, surprised to see how flat the roof was on this section of the house. She walked a few feet over, and plopped down, pulling her hair from her face and patting the roofing next to her. Gareth sat beside her, inhaling the clear night air as he looked around him at the view. It was actually breathtaking, the lights from the party sparkling below and the lake in the distance.

“How the hell do you know about this?” He asked, turning to her.

She blushed a little, smiling. “Eddie and I used to hide up here from the cops.” She chuckled.

Of course, it was Eddie. Gareth sighed a little, thinking enviously of them up here alone. He never went to parties, didn’t like them, but the rest of the gang had their fair share of long nights. For Eddie it was the dealing, for Y/N it was band. She even hung out with the cheer squad sometimes. Highschool was not as isolating for her, and he was both mad about it and happy for her at the same time.

“What?” She poked him, pulling a pack of cigarettes out of her sock.

He shrugged, trying to find words as he watched her reach into her bra for a lighter. God damnnit.

“Uh.” he mumbled, accepting a cigarette from her as she waited for him to reply.

“I don’t know,” he managed, “I think maybe I drank too much punch.”

She looked concerned, then grabbed his free hand. “I’m sorry.” She whispered as she played with his fingers.

Finding it hard to focus, Gareths reply came slow. “S’not your fault sweetheart.”

She grinned at the pet name. He’d seen how she reacted to it once and had mockingly used it ever since.

She brushed her finger over his knuckles. “Can I tell you a secret?’ She said, and he nodded.

“Mark puts like four bottles of everclear in that punch.” She laughed, and he groaned.

“Thanks for the warning.” He laughed.

“I said I was sorry.” She giggled.

She was staring at their entwined hands, quiet, when they both heard a thump from the open bathroom window.

“Shit.” She whispered, scooting back so no one would see them.

They waited for someone to come out the window, but no one came. Suddenly a moan echoed loudly from the window, and Gareth looked over at Y/N, eyes wide.

She was trying to stifle a laugh as they heard another moan and a grunt.

“Steve!” The voice said, giggling, and Y/N let out a quiet snort, unable to contain the giggles.

“Oh shit,” they heard Steves voice, “the windows open.” Steve looked out, confused as he looked side to side, unable to see them at the angle they sat.

“Must’ve been the wind.” He muttered, and they heard the window shut.

Y/N let out another giggle, less quiet this time and they both dissolved in laughter.

“Fucking Steve.” Y/N whispered, “he’s such a man whore.”

“I don’t blame him.” Gareth whispered back, chuckling.

“Jealous?” Y/N quipped back, taking a drag from her cigarette.

“You’re telling me if you could you would just put out all the time?” Gareth asked, leaning back.

“If I could.” Y/N giggled again. “Ill have you know I have no trouble in that department, thank you very much.”

“I didn’t mean-“ Gareth stuttered, turning pink.

“I know what you meant.” She smiled. “Its just…uh. Different for men?” She paused.

“When I do it, people say things.”

“Things?” Gareth sat up, suddenly angry.

“Calm your tits.” She laughed, “People are just mean. Can’t have sex without being a slut, cant be a virgin without being a prude. You know how it goes.” She sighed.

“You’re not a slut.” Gareth whispered.

She looked over at him, their arms touching again. “I know, but thank you.” She whispered.

“I’m also not exactly a prude,” she continued, leaning into him. “It is what it is.”

He wanted to desperately in that moment to make her feel better. There was an ache in him, reaching out. He’d had a girlfriend freshman year, talked to one or two people, but he’d never been this close with another girl before and it felt sacred. There was also something else there, something he ignored, a closeness with her that he knew was different. Sometimes it felt like lust, but mostly it felt like passion. He felt the same thing when he played his drums, all warm and buzzing, like every cell in his body was radiating with electricity.

“Earth to Gareth.” Y/N said, reaching over to poke his nose.

“Im here,” he laughed, “sorry.”

“Whatchya thinking?” She asked.

He hesitated. “Just that..youre a very special person.” He blushed.

“Special?” She whispered.

“Very.” He said. The booze was wearing off but he still felt the boldness. “To me.” He added.

He could hear Y/N’s breath catch at the words, and felt his cheeks burn immediately.

“I..shit, im-“ he started, regretting the awkward tension between them now, wishing he could take it back.

She put a finger to his lips, shushing him. “Shut up for a second.” She said, looking at him intently.

“Are you drunk?” She asked carefully.

“No, tipsy?” He said, wondering if he should be blaming this on the alcohol.

She nodded. “Im going to say something and I’d like you to know that Im high but like, just a little bit not a lot.” She rambled.

He nodded, his heart pounding again.

“I…I think…I KNOW,” she paused, “that you are a very important person to me too.”

Gareth felt like the weight of the world was lifting off his shoulders, like he might float off the roof.

“Very special?” He whispered, leaning in.

“Very.” She replied, still staring at him. He saw her gaze shift from his eyes to his lips for a split second and cracked. In one swift gesture he bridged the gap between them, smashing his lips onto hers and pulling her towards him. She leaned into it, kissing him with so much fervor he fell onto his back, pulling her on top of him. A soft moan came out of Y/N, her lips leaving his and making their way across his face, down his jaw and towards his neck.

“Gareth…” she whined, leaving wet kisses down his neck before locking onto his lips again.

He was gone, practically drunk on the taste of her and the feeling of her pressed against him. He never thought shed like him back, not Y/N, the perfect girl next door with the softest body and kindest eyes. Neither of them was taking care to be quiet as Y/N shrugged the flannel off his shoulders, pawing at his shirt, and moaning in his mouth like she was dying to be as close to him as possible. She was swallowing his own sounds of pleasure as he pulled away, gasping for air. They lay there for a minute, catching their breath as Gareth traced his hand up the back of her thigh. His fingers didn’t stop at the hem of her skirt, instead pushing it up slightly to feel the roundness of her butt, the hem of those lace panties making him groan softly.

“You don’t have to stop.” She whispered, brushing her nose against him, adjusting herself into a straddle position over his lap.

He kissed her softly this time, hand tracing the outline of her underwear up her thigh. She shuddered at the touch, cheeks blooming with red under the moonlight.

Stopping for a moment, he reached up and cupped her face.

“Be my girlfriend, Y/N?” He begged, quietly.

She hummed, nodding, her reply a clear yes and she leaned in to kiss him again.

“Finally.” She whispered.

#gareth x reader #gareth the great #stranger things

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wisteriainslumber · 5 months

Text

leoidevil friendship headcanons

two posts so soon?? no wayyy everyone seems to love their dynamic in penned in ink (deserved, i love them) so i decided to give you some fun, general hcs about the mean girls of all

warnings: swearing? i think thats it. wow, go me

they share a steady HBIC rotation

they respect each other so much but it will never look like it (bc seven forbid they show love and compassion and care in clown school, right?)

insults in this group = love. the more unhinged, the more it means they care for each other

aka if you try to break them up bc they look like they're going to throw hands they'll flip the narrative as if you are the crazy one for thinking they're genuinely fighting

do you see why these three are always split up in events now?

leovil are constantly using honey, dear, and sweetie in their arguments (derogatory)

once, when particularly annoyed, idia called them mom and dad bc 1. they remind him of his parents and 2. he hoped it would be weird enough to change the topic but no, leovil are running with it

there's made up lore about how idia was adopted. the story changes every time. so far, idias been a double orphan, picked up at a dumpster, cloned, picked up from the lost and found, and at some point he was biologically related to that fire lizard from frozen 2

leona regularly gifts idia super expensive jewelry. he receives a bunch of them and believes idia would have something better to do with them than he can (idia uses them for cosplay and hands some off to ortho because he likes the way it shines)

and the gifts progressively get very specific to idias interests but the chances of the court giving the second prince a custom headset (conveniently aligned with idias interests) seems relatively low

vil vehemently refuses the charity but will not say no to exclusive afterglow savanna garments (she wants to feel special and leona isn't thaaat opposed to it)

whenever someone offhandedly mentions that they got their eyes on something, its a race to see who can get it first

and bc vil is a sentimental one, his room is FILLED with trinkets and photos of his outings

leovil is always caught up on idias current obsessions, with leona knowing the key plot points and vil only knowing the names and faces

idia would not stfu abt this con and leovil didn't have time to pretend like it was annoying bc they do NOT KNOW who to go as (presumably idia just wanted to talk or maybe get one of them to go to the con for him but the girls were not having that)

like these two binged Idia's 'show of the month' and were having so much trouble figuring out who his favourite characters were, but ultimately settled for the main character and her friends

idia LOVEDD the surprise even though he has like, no clue who tf they were cosplaying (turns out leovil remembered the title completely wrong)

leovil were hella committed to keeping up their character while idia was too busy running around like an excited puppy

vil always carried around a bunch of tampons for his classmates but has a seperate pouch for leona & idia (bc they have nice patterned packaging. that's it)

leona's homescreen is a photo of them wearing mouse-ear shades. they all look so cool (leona has not revealed the lockscreen to anyone)

vil always lends his products to his friends because besties share everything (he even has specific formulas he's custom made for them! vil's never ever EVER gonna give them away tho bc then he wont have an excuse for an impromptu skincare session LMAOO)

leona's the designated everything holder bc idias backpack is always filled with random junk and his posture is terrible and he's the only one who can apparently 'treat vil's purse with respect' (he complains about it though)

even if they weren't important, i feel like if they got group kidnapped, they'd bully the kidnapper so hard that they'd be let go unharmed and the kidnapper would be in tears

leona has ALLLL the tea and it takes a swipe from idia to verify the facts. with rumours, vil can pinpoint exactly who is being talked about, down the the dorm, year, and class number

idia sits in between the custody battle for epel and jack DAILY. but the silly thing is whenever idia chimes in with a perfectly reasonable idea (like say, flip a coin), leovil suddenly get along again just to say it's a dumb idea (its not)

idia and leona have sibling solidarity and bc vil is an only child they exercise their sibling rights just to tell vil complete lies (aka, anything vil does, like sneezing, will receive a comment like 'if you sneeze more than 4 times a day, it means you're awakening a ghost')

and they're committed to the bit. idia will absolutely forge research articles and leona will claim his fifth-cousin-twice-removed had mysteriously gone missing because of it

when vil's feeling down they do not gas the queen up (she already knows it, hun). they let vil raid their closets to pick out their outfits for a photoshoot

when vil's not in the mood for THAT then its a code red. leoide will dress themselves up so good that vil feels underdressed so now he HASSS to go on their impromptu outing. peer pressure wins again

the gossip sessions over shaved ice or any kind of dessert go CRAZY in this trio, like they're so loud bc the tea is outrageous and you want to be mad but at the same time, go on, i gotta hear more

idias ideal hangout is a self-care day. they'll all wear facemasks and idia will do everyone's nails and they all gossip

sometimes idia will come up with a theory, like that sam is from another world, and vil will say it's bogus but ends up feeding more evidence for the theory

once vil beat idia in a video game (that idia was a pro at, mind you) on the first try and idia declared their friendship over

vil and idia are video game buddies but not past the AMs bc vil has a bed time (leona's still salty about the cats & videogames comparison so he only watches)

vil and idia fight over custody of ortho all the time but leona just uses the distraction to get ortho to leak all the juicy secrets

other than that vil and ortho are doing evil potion making aka finding creative ways go sneak veggies in leoides food

the trio never have any real drama so they always end up 'fighting' each other over the stupidest shit. like the way they tie their shoes, the typo they just made, or how loud they breathe

whenever one of them is seriously down, it's always a bad-cop/good-cop situation bc getting too serious makes these emotionally stunted losers feel icky

they do talk about their feelings though, but it never turns into a pity party

idia LOOOVES being dramatic tho and will set the stage for his sob story only for it to be that the cashier didn't wish him a good day

vil will use idia's lingo for the shock factor and pretends it never happened after and leona will pretend like he didn't like that his time got wasted but will reassure him. and by reassure i mean he stands w idia in line and says 'have a good day' to the cashiers so they'll say 'you too'

and no idc what u say, idia will chat shit about everyones crushes but will do one of two things: A. be besties w them if his friends end up dating and B. have a crush on the BAREEE MINIMUM

okay i joke a lot but leoidevil all keep each other in check and strive to uplift & become the best version of themselves

its three different flavours of self-hatred all communicating with each other

and they will still preach self-love (leona bc he thinks they deserve better, idia bc he gave up but that doesnt mean his loved ones have to, and vil bc he believes you will never be at a satisfactory point in ur life if you dont make amends with yourself)

btw they have a very elaborate plan to go to therapy together and a back up plan if they happen to end up at the ward instead

friendship bracelets but its the admission wrist bands

all in all, the whole school is afraid of this power trio but they're just super weird together

12/10 leovil still have pictures of idia's phantom bride wedding day

if there's other groupings or ships you want me to do hcs for, send me an ask! i love exploring character dynamics smmm this will definitely be a new series of mine

#idk what a block limit is but i hit it and I CANT ADD MORE NOOOO #didn't even get to talk abt leona as much as i want but know that idia & vil look up to him sm #it doesnt look it but idevil absolutely follow leona like little duckies (they're unaware of this but leona finds it cute)#literally feel free to add ur own i LOVE hearing everyones hcs they're all canon to me #they all have potential for part 2's isnt that great #every time i try to think of a name for this series i think 'clown school club'#me and the boys pulling up to the night raven clown association #its so horrible i might keep it but im open to suggestions #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland headcanons #vil shoenheit #idia shroud #leona kingscholar

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hotwings0203 · 2 years

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Guys I'm so so sorry abt this idek what this is aha<3

TW: unrequited feelings, angst, romance fluff and pain

Some days Tomura doesn't want you.

Everything you say, everything you do, the way you look at him...it's too much.

The way you look at him is too sweet. It gives him a sickly, saccharine taste in his mouth and he withholds himself from getting nauseous. All the love you have in your eyes as you tell him about your shopping haul is too much for him to reciprocate, and he wonders how you can't tell. Is he that good at faking it?

Or do you purposely look down a second early to ignore it, your eyes flitting away to the side as you babble on about whatever new makeup line that just came out, your smile strained and yet persisting to stay up as proof you're not as dumb as you want him to think you are.

Your hands feel too fragile, too dependent and clingy as you tightly loop your fingers through his scratchy ones. He never thought you were too heavy physically, but your presence lingers above his horizons more like a plague, and less like a cloud. He starts to get a headache when you pull him across the mall and show him the shoes he's been subtly checking out for about two weeks now. You know what he wants, and you excitedly point at the display in the window, your large eyes imploring his dull ones to look at the sale the shoes are on for.

You end up hurrying up after him as he wordlessly turns on his heels to head to nowhere in specific.

He's wanted kids for as long as he can remember, and you don't.

He used to tell you how he wishes he could become the dad he never had-a strong, supportive, and protective father who dotes on every kid, regardless of their gender. At first, you nodded eagerly and said you fully understood his point of view. You talked about how great it was that he was trying to overcome childhood trauma and generational cycles of abuse.

He started tuning out when you began to tell him that you were scared of the pain of having kids and how you didn't want to always usurp the "bad guy" role as a mother who's trying to raise her kids right, blah blah blah.

Sex started to feel like a chore after a while, a means to assure you that he still wanted you.

Now he doesn't know who he's trying to convince more, you or himself.

You used to dress up in babydolls and beg him to use handcuffs on you, playful ways to try and seduce him. At one point it would make him laugh and toss you on the bed before climbing over you and making love to you.

These days he coldly interjects and tells you to turn the lights off before avoiding the show of you undressing. Your body, your youth, it all reminds him of what he wants but can't have.

You're both just too different.

Tomura never tells his friends about you, says something along the lines of "I like keeping my private affairs and friends separate" while you giddily defend this notion to your friends and tell them all the good things he does. You buy him a unisex chain with a message written on the inside of the locket, and when you both hang out two weeks before his graduation, he tells you he doesn't wear chains. You jokingly hint that he might still be getting one anyways, because there isn't a refund option, and he flat-out says he'll throw the gift away if you give it to him. When you wince slightly and try to chuckle it off with a "I'll kill you if you try", he smiles thinly and says he likes that you don't take anything he says seriously.

He goes a few weeks without talking to you, sending you snaps and leaving you on read when you try to engage in a conversation over messages or just plain and simple ignoring any messages you send his way. You laugh about revenge and tell yourself when he comes back you'll leave him on read this time, but when he sends one sentence of words back to you it never happens.

Sometimes he reiterates that he wants to take things slow, that marriage is in the future for him, but he just wants to chill right now. Other times you talk about compromise, things you can do better for him or change for a happier future between the two of you.

There isn't much you put your foot down on.

How can you give him so much? Shigaraki thinks to himself. Don't you have any shame, any self-respect? How can you call all these compromises love?

How can you give so much, when he has so little to return?

It's like a burden on him, instead of a reprieve.

Your love is suffocating him.

By doing everything for him, you are doing nothing for yourself.

But for the meantime, he'll let you have your fun and drag him around the mall a bit some more.

He'll let you pull him the opposite direction of where the kids play, away from the stores you buy him unused gifts from, away from all the food you love and he hates.

Maybe there's no place you can actually go with him.

After all, you'll have to realize it at some point as well.

There's only so far you can run from yourself, and him too

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aimwigs · 2 months

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your dadwig fics INVOKED something in me. qt and lud would def become better copayments later on and i could see her/slime being the godparents for anthony jr incase anything happening to lud and aiden. the way you write the dynamics in the group is amazing and i can’t wait to see more!! also the brief snippet of nick and im assuming z2’s son? the way you write him as a dad based on what he talks about in his own childhood makes so much since. also, would nicks/z2’s kid basically be lucy and ryan’s cousin/raised as such? because if i can just IMAGINE the terror that kid would create with lucy

sorry this took me sooooo long to write but here is the last dadwig fic for a while and well it's actually more of an aiden fic. loved all that you said abt nick's kid and lucy so decided to make a little fic out of it! this is actually set the same night as the campout fic!

and also yeah lud and qt are goated coparents + they all stay very close!!! something about it taking a village lmao

Aiden has always seen himself as generally pretty good with kids. He grew up with much younger brothers, for starters, so in some ways, it occasionally felt like he played a hand in raising them, between acting as a role model when they were in their teens and babysitting them when they were younger. He’s also always gotten along well with his friends’ kids and dated a girl who worked with children for several years, often tagging along with her while she was with them. He’s always wanted to be a dad and these things have always assured him that he’ll be a good one someday, whenever that day might be.

That’s why he thinks it’ll be no problem when Ludwig asks him to watch Lucy while he’s on a campout with Ryan’s Girl Scout troop since QT is out of town visiting her sister. It should be easy enough— she’s a little rambunctious but she’s always liked him and besides, if he can’t watch his boyfriend’s kid for a night, he has no business dating a guy with kids.

He comes up with this big grand plan for their time together: he’s going to take her mini golfing, grab dinner with her, and then throw on the new Pixar movie while she winds down for bedtime. It’ll be the perfect fun little night for her to enjoy while her dad and sister are off roughing it in the woods.

And then Nick’s wife goes into labor.

“I just need you to watch him while we’re at the hospital,” he says frantically, pushing Mason through his front door.

Mason looks super bewildered, his mop of dark hair sticking out in every direction as he stands there with his Thomas the Tank Engine backpack. He probably has no idea what to make of the fact that he has a baby brother on the way. Or maybe he’s just three.

“It’s no problem,” he tells him because it’s not. He already told the two of him that he was down to watch Mason whenever the baby came and even if he does have Lucy tonight, it’ll probably be more fun for them to have a sleepover anyway. They’re practically cousins.

“Thank you.” Nick hugs him tightly and bolts back towards the car, quickly pulling out of the driveway and speeding off toward the hospital.

Mason peers up at him with his dad’s icy blue eyes. “I need to pee.”

Right. Okay. He’s got this. He leads Mason to the bathroom even though he’s been to his place about a hundred times by now and takes his backpack into the living room so he knows where it is when it’s time to go to bed. Two kids tonight. No problem.

It’s still early, so he makes Mason some lunch and parks him in front of the TV while he evaluates his plans for the night. Nick was in too much of a rush to give him a car seat, so he probably shouldn’t drive him around the city for mini golf and dinner. Except, maybe he can sit in Lucy’s car seat and she can just sit in the car since she’s older and a little tall for her age. That still seems like pushing it, though, so maybe they just stay in tonight. He’ll have to decide later.

Ludwig shows up right after lunch to hand off Lucy, her car seat, and her overnight bag.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to take her to Slime’s so you only have one kid on your plate tonight?” he asks, nodding towards where Mason and Lucy are already jumping up and down on his couch, the latter still wearing her shoes.

He waves him off. “I’ve got this. It’s two kids and they’re already friends. What’s the worst that can happen?”

Ludwig snorts. “With those two? Arson, probably. Maybe highway robbery.”

Aiden rolls his eyes. “Seriously, Lud, it’s fine. We’re going to have a fun night.”

He gives him an amused smile. “Well, if you’re sure, I guess I’ll leave her here with you. I’m sure Slime would come to get her if you need help, though.”

“I won’t.”

“Sure, babe,” Ludwig kisses him on the cheek when none of the kids are looking.

Their relationship isn’t a secret, per se, they’ve just been putting off telling Ludwig’s daughters about it officially. Since neither Ludwig nor QT have dated since the breakup, it’s definitely something new that they’re going to have to have a conversation about. Though, six months of dating feels a little like they’re pushing it off.

Ludwig pulls Ryan out the door and leaves shortly after. As soon as the door clicks shut, Aiden makes his way over to where Mason and Lucy are still jumping on his couch. If they have this much energy, maybe mini golf should stay on the table.

He claps his hands together. “Okay! We’re gonna have an awesome day together. Who wants to go mini golfing?!”

Instead of the overwhelming response he expects from two young children who very much enjoyed mini golf when they all went together like two months prior, Mason just shrugs and Lucy crosses her arms over her chest.

“Uncle Slime says mini golf is for normies,” she informs him.

He cocks an eyebrow. Fucking Slime, dude. “Do you even know what that means?”

She holds her chin high. “It means that cool people don’t mini golf.”

Mason, who he’s pretty sure idolizes Lucy about as much as she idolizes Slime, nods frantically. “I wanna be cool.”

He cycles through other possible ideas for fun things they can do together. Bowling is out because the last time they went Lucy had a total meltdown and he doesn’t care for a repeat of that. They could do a hike if it weren’t for the fact that losing service is probably a terrible idea when Mason’s new brother could arrive literally whenever at this point. An arcade could be a decent option, he supposes, but Mason might still be too little to understand how the games work.

“Let's walk to the park,” he decides because there’s a pretty decent playground in his neighborhood that both of them have been to a few times.

This, at least, they both agree on. He grabs a few water bottles from the kitchen while Mason puts on his shoes and they walk over together. Or really, run, because Lucy and Mason break into a dead sprint in the direction of the park as soon as they step outside.

He speedwalks after them— one perk of being tall as fuck is that it’s easier to keep up. He’s glad that they’re so excited, at least, and at the park, they can largely entertain themselves. If they did go mini golfing, he would have had to facilitate the entire time.

Of course, he keeps an eye on them as they dart around and become best friends with kids that they’ll probably never see again after today. To be fair, that’s something that he also does well into his 30s.

Maybe he does get slightly distracted responding to messages— it’s not like he’s worried about them when they’re clearly plenty entertained by the park itself and he knows them well enough to know they won’t run off without checking in with him. He figures it’ll be fine.

And then he hears an all-too-familiar scream.

He sprints over to find Mason on the ground below the slide crying and clutching his ankle, half his leg scraped up on the woodchips. He must have gone off the side somehow, probably by standing.

Lucy is as pale as a ghost as she stares at him. “Is he gonna die?”

“What? No,” he tells her as he crouches down to look at his ankle. It looks fine but he knows that ankles are fucking weird sometimes. “Are you okay, buddy?”

Mason lets out another quivering sob. “N-no.”

“Can you walk?” he tries.

Without trying, he shakes his head.

Okay. He can handle this. It’s fine. He just hopes he doesn’t have to take him to the hospital— he can’t imagine running into Nick there and having to explain that within hours of Mason getting dropped off, there’s already been a medical emergency.

“Come here.” Aiden reaches out and lets Mason climb into his arms. Fuck, for such a tiny kid, he’s damn heavy.

He carries him home with Lucy walking at his side, blue eyes comically wide. He gets the full story: she dared him to run down the slide but didn’t know what would happen. Aiden is pretty sure that she’s learned her lesson plenty.

When he gets home, he lays him down on the couch and immediately props his leg up on a pillow. He goes to pull his shoe off and hesitates. Fuck, he hasn’t taken a first-aid class in twenty years. Are you supposed to leave it on because of the swelling or some shit?

Out of the corner of his eye, he notices Lucy hovering, clearly still freaked out. It probably doesn’t help that he’s clearly fucking panicking. He takes a deep breath and turns to her. “Lucy, can you go to the bathroom upstairs and grab the first-aid kit that’s under the sink?”

She nods and runs upstairs. He honestly doesn’t know what he needs from it. He just wanted to give her a task.

He inspects Mason’s ankle a bit more closely. It still looks fine. Grabbing the base of his foot, he gently tilts it up and down. There’s no seizing up or sudden yelp of pain.

“Does that hurt?”

Mason sniffles. “Yeah.” He seems almost unsure about it.

Aiden isn’t a medical professional but he’s pretty sure he probably just twisted it and that it’ll probably be fine. The shoes can come off, then, for the sake of his throw pillows.

After Lucy returns with the first-aid kit, he picks out the remaining woodchips and cleans up the scrapes on his leg before bandaging him up. He’s not going to get out of explaining this one to Nick but considering that he used to skate, he’s probably seen much worse.

He makes a makeshift ice pack and wraps it in a kitchen towel before placing it on Mason’s ankle. He’s not even really crying anymore.

“You’re gonna be okay, let’s just keep the ice on it for a little,” he tells him. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Lucy’s shoulders visibly relax. “How about we watch a movie and order pizza?”

“C-can we get pepperoni?”

Smiling softly, Aiden ruffles his hair. “Of course, we can get pepperoni.”

He sets them up with the Pixar movie that he planned to put on anyway and orders the pizza before settling back into his seat on the other end of the couch. Both of them seem too enthralled by the movie to remember that they were super freaked out like twenty minutes ago.

His phone buzzes with a text from Slime.

you good over there bro? lud said you’ve got the dastardly fucking duo tonight

He smiles as he replies with a picture of the two of them, wide-eyed as they stare at the TV.

all good :)

Crisis aside, Aiden is pretty sure he’s a damn good babysitter.

#dadwig #aiden #my fic #answered #anonymous

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lil-tokyo-42 · 10 months

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Loki laufeyson x Y/N Time of love

alr New fanfic series! kinda nervous bc idk what to do- BUT ILL TRY MY BEST LITTLE ONES!!! listening to my hype playlist aint helping im abt to dance

WARNINGS: mentions of abuse, cursing, strict parents, knife/dagger. if you dont enjoy or feel comfortable with these topics you're free to leave!

-You were a simple 29yo woman with abusive parents. You had no other place to stay, and your best friend had strict parents. They don't allow anyone else but family members in their house. You were in a miserable life, but your friend supported you all the way. Today those sorry excuses of parents let you go to the busy street where it looked so beautiful. Can't believe they let you out the house with booty shorts and a oversized hoodie and headphones

(this but it was night time)

-Just now getting out of a place you see everyone freaking out suddenly. "What the hell could be going on?" whispering to yourself. You saw this gut in gold, green and black holding some staff with a bright blue light at the end of it. To be honest, he was kinda cute. He starts to introduce himself. You thought this guy was just doing the most, until he shouts. "KNEEL". Every person starts to kneel before the man, he did look dangerous and like he can do some serious damage to this part of the town. You jumped and stood there against the shop wall.

-He starts to look if everyone followed his order but his eyes are locked to yours. You wanted to run out of there and get to your house but you didn't budge. He makes everyone make a path to get to you. Your bag of food dropped out of your grasp, your eyes went wide, and you started shaking. He's in front of you. Staring at you. You expected worse like he would make you kneel but, he took off his helmet and put the staff against the wall

-"Hello there mortal." He says blandly looking up and down at your figure. You start noticing and wanting to cover your plush thighs but you feel like you can't move. He starts to speak but notices your red face looking somewhere else from his gaze. "I'm Loki, God of mischief and I am burdened with a glorious purpose" Did he really just say that? "O-Oh I'm Y/N" Stuttering because of his tall figure with his hands next to his mid section to show that he wont hurt you.

-Out of nowhere he makes a dagger appear and hands it to you. He smiles while you hesitantly take it from his cold hands. "Thank you.." "Don't think of me as a villain, I'm like you. Neglected." He sure did look like it. You thought this was a myth but you snapped out of your trance when some guy in the american flag colors appears behind ya'll. "Excuse me for a moment" Loki says giving a warm smile and wink.

-You were positively sure this was not the first meeting you guys would have. You grabbed your bag and ran back to your house. Opening the front door, your dad comes to the door to yell at you but then notices you're shocked and almost traumatized. "The fuck your scared for? We didn't beat you up THAT bad!" You don't give an answer, but the fact that you met a GOD. A LITERAL GOD. "Why aren't you ANSWERING MY QUESTION!?" Your dad yells before throwing a beer bottle at you. You then again snapped out of your trance and use the dagger that Loki gave you

-You crashed the glass bottle to the floor and your mother then came to the scene to find a shocked father and a scared but still shocked daughter. "What the actual FUCK is happening?!" You were gonna say something but your father just had to cut you off. "YOUR STUPID LITTLE GIRL JUST CRASHED AND SPILLED A FRESH BEER BOTTLE TO THE FLOOR" You looked at him with disbelief. "You threw it at me! What was i supposed to do?!" "LET IT HIT YOU BITCH! WHY DO YOU HAVE A DAGGER TOO?!" Your mom just stood there but then heard you had a dagger, she never raised you like that but then again she abused you from 4 years old.

-"What is wrong with you Y/N?!" That. Was. The. LAST. Straw. "Y'know what? I'm DONE! IM 29 YEARS OLD, A FUCKING ADULT. YOU WONT LET ME LIVE MY LIFE, YOU WONT LET ME HANG WITH THE ONLY FRIEND THAT ACTUALLY FEELS LIKE FAMILY, AND THE FACT YOU GET MAD OVER THE SMALLEST THINGS!! I MET A GOD WHO'S FIGHTING A SUPERHERO, AND THE AMOUNT OF TIMES YOU BEAT ME UP!" The parents look flabbergasted at the sudden outburst of their daughter "Do you know who your talking to little girl!?" your mother who had the audacity to blurt. "YEAH THE BITCH WHO CANT TAKE PROPER CARE OF THEIR DAUGHTER!" You said before leaving once more to your room to pack up and leave this retched household. -I wonder if i'll meet him again...- (- - mean thoughts)

GAWD DAUYM AM I TIRED. sometimes on july i just cant sleep and it happened last july so thats why this took so long but I TRIED MY BEST LITTLE ONES (why does little one remind me of thanos???)

#loki x you #loki fanfic #loki x reader #loki laufeyson #loki x yn #loki fluff (?)#WHY IS THERE A HASHTAG OF LOKI X GRANDMASTER #tf wrong wit yall bro #nvm now i know why it reminds me of thanos.

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blindmagdalena · 2 years

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I’ve got a theory abt homelander—and this is partially canon bc like we see it played out through the show, but its interesting how he sort of shapes himself to be what the ppl he loves want him to be. Or rather what he thinks they want 😅 with stillwell, he was the most “homelander”, if that makes sense. An all american pretty face, saying his lines perfectly, pulling strings behind the scenes to try to achieve her ends. With stormfront, the violence becomes more blatant and extreme, and we even see it to a degree with ryan (because despite how badly he may have wanted a family, he sort of pulled the involved dad thing out of nowhere). It really speaks to his lack of identity, and its also sort of why i disagree with the extreme abusive yandere characterization a lot of ppl have w homie 😭 bc while he is unbelievably toxic and scary, i think he’s extremely cognizant of the ppl around him. If he truly loved someone, i dont think he’d go out of his way to hurt them (problem is, his concept what “hurting someone” actually means is… skewed, to put it nicely). But, more than anything, no matter what he says, he wants be loved. So he’ll do whatever it takes, be whoever he needs to be, to make sure that the people he loves love him, too. He’s mirrorball coded 😭😭 sorry for the essay, i just have many awful homelander thoughts and ur my fav homiewriter so u get the word vomit 🙃 hope ur having a good night!!

don't apologize, I loved waking up to this!!! I think you're 100% correct. homelander is a chameleon. he has spent his entire life adapting to what people expect or want from him. he was abused by vogelbaum, groomed by stillwell, and stormfront was also using him for her agenda. homelander has pretty exclusively experienced love as a transaction. he was drip fed affection in exchange for performing to the expectations of whoever's love he was seeking. I reeeaaaally wish they hadn't dumbed down his relationship with maeve. between all the deleted scenes and the bits of context we got, I feel like theirs was the most complicated relationship he had. I desperately would have liked a more nuanced take than the hamfisted comparison between them and soldier boy/countess. strongly agree that he wouldn't be overly physically abusive to anyone he was smitten with. stormfront had to bully him into throwing her around and even then he still paused or stopped every time he thought he actually hurt her. homelander doesn't need to use his strength to make a point. he's way more cunning than he gets credit for. this is a safe space for meta rambling, my sweet. I also firmly believe in homelander being deeply multifaceted. I tend to write him as initially standoffish, even hostile, and the kind of person to make pretty snap judgements about people. If he decides he likes someone, first comes fixation. it's not love, it's not kind, it's fascination. the next stage is infatuation. I think a key aspect of what you mentioned is 'if he truly loved someone.' I don't know if HE even knows what that looks like yet. he turned on madelyn because she lied to him, but he still mourned and deeply missed her. did he love her? maybe, but in his mind she committed too many cardinal sins. she lied to him, she was afraid of him, and she didn't love him back, which is the only thing he ever really wanted from her.

#anyways homelander is not a good person but he's not a mustache twirling villain either and that's why we love a pathetic man #homelander meta #homelander #darling anon #homelander headcanons #this is so incoherent but just know that i appreciate you and your take #thank you so much for the kind words!!!#ask and you shall receive

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formosusiniquis · 6 months

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i am so predictable but i always want to hear more abt fake dating 💕

So the most important thing to know is that once upon a time there was this post going around on tumblr.com about how the scene in a fake dating au where the couple spends an extremely intimate time role playing how they got together and every date they've ever had is completely unnecessary because most people will hear someone say hey this is my partner and ask max 2 more questions and it diverged into jokes about breaking up couples that don't know anything about the other.

The second most important thing to know is that Steve's parents are lavender married and while he doesn't know it know it but he's pretty sure. So he's gonna pretend to date Eddie about it, because in his ultimate wisdom he figures if his parents see someone being queer and happy in the 80's they'll get a divorce and stop being so miserable all the time.

The third most important thing to know is I personally think Steve's dad looks like if you bulked out David Duchovny and his mom is a soft butch who goes by Lu when she isn't being Mrs. Lucinda Harrington.

And here is some Steve and Robin vs Eddie dialogue that I don't think I've shared before?

“Wait,” she throws her hands up in front of her, turning to Eddie with her eyes open wide, “did you wear your bandana! Is that why she liked you so fast?” Steve reacts first, better at following the strings backward in Robin’s train of thought. “He wasn't flagging when he met my parents! Christ, Robin, give him some credit.” “I wore a button down for Christ's sake,” “He looked like Johnny Cash,” Steve says that like a secret meant just for Robin, but he can’t whisper worth a damn. When he leans over, much too far into Robin’s space Eddie knows the next bit is for them both, “And I would have taken it anyway, that would have really made it look fake. Bringing home a boy is one thing, a metal head is pushing it, but flagging as a sado top looking like that?”

#wip tag game #untitled fake dating au #cauldronoflove #ty jj <3 #you know those fics that start out as mostly vibes and you don't realize til too late that they probably need a plot too? that's this rn #i should get back into it now that my bang fic is done tho

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icharchivist · 10 months

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gosh, mentioning your friend who got bowled over by act 2 autumn must’ve been foreshadowing, because I, who foolishly was like, oh I don’t think I’ll relate to azami that much he’s very different from me but it’ll be fun to see autumn, cried twice while going thru the back half of this story. jeez. I’ll may have to be a bit less chronological than usual for the sake of keeping all of that stuff later.

zombie run night was rly great! more like zombie fun night amirite. I’m sorry I make bad jokes. banri getting azami to be a zombie as well was so nice like. again he’s being a good leader.

tenma being scared of zombies makes sense obviously. I’m with him. not zombies but when I was staying with a relative a while back I found a lizard the length of my hand in the bathroom and then refused to use that bathroom for the rest of my stay.

I really liked the eyeball necklace detail—it made the event feel real and also considerate? the moment yuki just went … at tenma I Knew he had planted the necklace on him tho. he’s so funny for that. seeing that and being like yeah tenma you’re so right. you don’t need to participate. cant believe mankai didn’t recognize banri when he caught them. azami must have some stellar makeup skills

azami going after sakyo and haunting him abt his budget lifestyle was sooo funny. like I was bracing for something slightly charged to happen but it was just funny. and he had a good time!! I’m glad. I liked that banri was like. still encouraging to azami even tho his acting motives aren’t the purest lol. I mean to be fair he has no room to talk there but it’s also just nice to like. meet him where he’s at. like we see azami doesn’t really get The Feeling until closing night but. things take time.

azami and omis whole thing was. so good. like the way he won’t even like accept a bandaid is so. azami… I loved the way they resolved it? first seeing omi juza and tsuzuru talking in uni was cool. but then kumon approaching azami was like. so nice. again the way that they like talk and kumon’s like I miss summer! and u can Hear the smile in azamis voice when he’s like come on summer literally just ended!

but him being awkward around omi bc he’s not sure what a mother should be like… gosh. like the way he describes the whole thing as like. strange and confusing I’m going to vote the wall like. like yeah actually that’s exactly how it feels when someone is kind to you in a way you haven’t yet experienced it makes you want to throw it off immediately bc it’s like whoa whoa hold on. I’m not allowed this kind of thing. anyways just. no wonder he likes kumon so much that guy is like, effusive in his praise and azami probably likes having ppl around who are Nice like that. loved omis portrait. it was so good. and it like. absolutely sucks that he had to grow up that quick. very nice to see nachi again, though. but when kid-omi was like: one day in the future. I’ll take a break for myself :) omi. omi I’m shaking you. have you ever really done that. well ig now that he’s living in mankai he’s letting his family take care of housework and stuff? but like, still.

minor note but when they’re doing a street act it was rly cool to see juza just like seamlessly and confidently advertise the play. he’s come so far…

*cracks knuckles* alright all of that was warmup now it’s time for the BIG STUFF. azami almost got hit by a car!!!! the cg there was like. So Good. like the way sakyo is absolutely Frazzled… yeah. like god I keep thinking abt that cg. its sooo. wow!! i dont think ive seen sakyo look so distressed!!! hes not wearing glasses bc he was so shocked that he ended up breaking his glasses in the rush to get there!! its like. azami look... u have a dad that wishes for your every happiness... and azami is just Sitting There mostly unharmed and looking a little confused like huh… why’s sakyo looking so out of sorts… it’s wonderful. and the way sakyo is like even if it was just a scrape I need to find who did this and hurt them. like godddd and the way he’s like “so I don’t even have the right to worry about you anymore?” I am. Going to cry.

what rly got me tho was like the whole jin-gi-oh cards though bc like first off sakyo remembered ALL of them but also!! also just the way u can hear azami kind of mumble stutter like we-well I bet he doesn’t even remember the card stuff (why would he really care about me…) and then sakyo clearly Does. and it’s just like.

it’s so clear that while sakyo is convinced that he barely has the right to talk to azami bc he betrayed him by chasing after his dream… a lot of what azami is worried about is that sakyo doesn’t care about him anymore. like imagine you’re fourteen and you’ve just learned that the guy you secretly think of as your dad, who’s like the only one that’s supported your dreams, is leaving you to pursue his own. without you. and you get into a huge fight with him about it and storm off. and then a week passes and you don’t hear from him. months pass and you don’t hear from him. whenever he’s around doing ginsenkai stuff you just… don’t really talk to him. and you’re fourteen maybe fifteen so you’re too embarrassed to reach out first. besides if he left that easily maybe this whole thing was just a job to him, huh? maybe he never liked you as much as you liked him. whatever. whatever. it’s fine. like the “I bet he’s having so much fun now” line azami says… it’s so clear he believes like. oh sakyo was slumming it with me and left for greener pastures.

and of course sakyo is sitting there like oh I’ve committed the biggest betrayal ever by not supporting his dreams well enough. he probably hates me and doesn’t want to ever see my face again. and like that’s not helping.

and then you run away from your bio dad because you can’t let go of your own dreams and when you don’t have anywhere to go it turns out that you can actually run to the place sakyo went to. and strangest of all sakyo is letting you stay. like the way he just. the pause he has when sakyo says he’s basically his guardian. the feeling of. sakyo is… admitting that? does he… does he WANT to be my dad (I thought he didn’t want to—)

and now you’re here in a hospital and just saw sakyo was super worried about you and also like. maybe treasures you in the way that you thought he did. sakyo says his story of running away is about a pathetic kid but it’s also like. for azami he just learned that the card thing he did with sakyo and liked so much that he still keeps them carefully is actually a parent-child thing sakyo did with his own mom!!! it’s like. oh my god.

azami talking abt his own experience with buying cards and then his dad trashing them, though… I. hm. I am going to leave the section abt azami’s bio dad alone bc I’m tempted to get mean about it and I kind of want to leave that for later.

so, skipping forward to the actual play… it was so cool to see summer come in for support! and I always love seeing how the chapters extend what we see in the actual play. also the voice acting that’s good too. the one thing I noticed was like. “you remember the boy with brown hair you killed three years ago?” who’s going to tell them that taichis hair is as red as ever. so roy’s hair was never brown. it got kinda brown when he became undead? but before I don’t think it was.

cannot believe those asshole delinquents were the ones who almost hit azami. the title “buff high schooler” is just rly funny to me tho. sakoda chasing after azami and then calling everyone was so good of him. smart choice my guy. love how everyone in autumn (minus taichi who seems a little nervous) is like. it’s fighting time. very cool to see all of natsugumi volunteer to be opening act. was confused by the “I always repay my debts” line but I think it’s for banri acting as stand in for kumon? which is nice bc it’s like. tenma is the one saying this so it rly just gives the idea that like. natsugumi is a team yknow. and later when they do the acting it meshes so well with the actual play? bc like they had a specific point where they were like oh let’s adlib and do some comedy that’s undead related to make sure the play isn’t a bummer. and then here’s natsugumi just doing like those sorts of jokes.

anyways back to azamis kidnapping.

muku: won’t it be bad if they see ur faces?

me: …ah. I have. the faintest idea of where this is going [judo bear nozaki flashes to my head]

THE CG WAS. THE BEST POSSIBLE USE OF A CG EVER ITS SO GOOD. I LOST MY SHIT. THE HOLLOW EYES R KINDA TERRIFYING IN A REALLY FUNNY WAY. TAICHI THIS WAS AN AMAZING IDEA. the guitar / bass guitar (? idk instruments) that rolls in during this scene is amazingggg. it’s just the like instrumental break part of respawn which is. I went and listened to that after finishing boyhood collage and the song is like, sooooo good. much love to it. the rly fast vocal parts made me think of the fast parts of worlds end dancehall. which is like also apocalyptic setting so that was cool. also I love worlds end dancehall.

they were so funny during this tho. sakyo going “roooar. give us back our friend, you punkass kids.” and juza forgetting what bears sound like so he just literally goes “beaaarrrr” what are you a Pokémon?

and sakoda running towards azami!!! <3 I grew soooo much affection for sakoda in this story tbh like he takes care of azami so well!

thought it was very interesting that like. when they return, everyone in natsugumi is audibly exhausted minus tenma (he’s probably got great acting stamina) and misumi (I don’t think he says any lines here? but he’s probably just got excellent physical stamina. and he and tenma did start out with the like best acting chops of the troupe) which is a cool detail.

and then azami just carefully opening up that he was terrified. not of being hit but of disappointing them and the play. and then when he says to sakyo… “I’m only saying this once, but when I was a kid, I always thought of you as my dad. And… I still do.” IM GOING TO CRY. idk. like the way that azami just Says That and let’s it hang there and then they do the play.

izumi: wow the fight scenes r intense today! (please don’t tell me it’s bc they were just actually fighting…)

damn izumi what do u want me to tell you then. huh. they stomped in their with their animal heads and azami pirouetted back to mankai? no violence involved?

and sakoda crying at the play!! again I can hear the smile in azamis voice when sakodas like bawling in front of him. when azami was like. shift couldn’t make it…? I paused and was like. azami implied shift had an interest in theater at the end of act 2 summer… could it be… and then when azami was like “the god troupe, huh…” I was like ahhhh fuck. we shall see what goes on there later ig.

also they bring up vkei again when talking abt what they want to do next and izumi shut it down… what do u have against it! honestly eyes emoji at masumi saying he likes it, tho... mazumi expressing an opinion that doesnt align with izumi's personal tastes??? maybe I’m missing something.

but the ENDING!!!!!

citron: "I have reached my limit..." AND THEN GUYS THERE HES LITERALLY THERE!!!!! I’m assuming the <> for their dialogue means they’re speaking in their native tongue anyways im going to obsess over <Citronia.> <I've come to get you.> / <I've been wondering when you'd get here.> I knew guy was coming to get citron so I’m glad to see that’s confirmed… already gave my theories on the specifics so I’m interested to see if I’m anywhere close to the mark there.

okay and Now I can talk abt azamis bio dad. i. uh. I hate him. actually he really grinds my gears in a way I didn’t think was going to happen. so I’m worried that I’m being like somewhat unfair to him bc I’m projecting my own biases onto him. so I’m sorry if u have like good opinions of him. it’s rly so funny tho I knew azami did like makeup and stuff and I was like “oh I have. No Interest in makeup or skincare so I probably won’t relate to it too hard” and then This happened and it’s like I got hit with a bowling ball.

like goddd. the way azami is like yeah I bought some cards with my allowance, and then my dad who’s not sakyo found out and threw them out. “I learned then to never let my dad get his hands on anything I’d bought with my own money” gah… not to overshare but like, I feel azami so much there. growing up I would like. never want to tell my parents I liked Anything bc I knew they’d be like oh you’re so silly and dumb and stupid for wanting any kind of merch or collectibles! it’s such a hassle!! why do u like this stupid thing!! so. ahah. I went to a concert for the first time this year and I remember my parents thinking it was weird but then one day my dad called me and he was like oh I was talking to a colleague abt the concert you’re going too and he says that band you like is like, super cool and popular. so it’s like ah. ig now that an Adult has approved it I��m a cool kid now. the same way my writing was worth shit and was totally useless until a family friend kept gushing about the way I’d helped their daughter. anyways what I’m saying it is azami I get it.

and his dad then trashed his makeup, too… like the way sakyos defense for the handmade cards were that they were like “yakuza” cards so he couldn’t complain like it’s a flimsy defense but the fact that he even had to like, make a Justification about these cards when it’s like. these handmade cards aren’t going to help azami fit in or make friends at all so like they’re not accomplishing what the store bought ones were for. but like you still need to defend against it.

but yeah the way it’s like. wow at a pretty young age azami was like oh okay. so if I like ANYTHING I can’t tell my dad about it or he might ruin it. do I feel that this is perhaps part of why he seems so cautionary abt romance yeah sure.

the first time I actually teared up during this whole thing was actually sakyo in the hospital telling azami not to give up. that he can do it even in defiance of his parents. and it’s so meaningful bc sakyos like his DAD. and he’s telling him he’ll support him… like idk. something so heartwarming abt a parental figure being like, hey, you need to prize yourself to the point that if needs must, you can even rebel against me.

the conversation sakyo and izumi have after that, too… “after seeing my boss, I get the feeling there’s no dad out there who doesn’t care about his kids.” this line makes me feel. So Complicated. like I won’t deny the fact that I think azamis dad cares for him on…. Some level…. but it’s like homares grandmother. im glad she loved him but it doesn’t erase the ways that she hurt him, yknow?

also sakyo. you live with misumi tenma and masumi. masumi you can maybe argue his dad caring abt him and same with tenma (but. I mean I’m not HAPPY abt arguing that bc they r rly under baseline care.) but anyways are u gonna do that with misumi’s dad. then again probably only summer troupe knows about the situation there… honestly sakyo probably knows nothing abt the tenma situation too. so he’d only know about masumi and masumis dad seemed like fairly reasonable and nice at the end.

sakoda was so cool here tho. first off having the nerve to even try to still lie about the tickets to protect azami. and then when azami got dragged to his bio dad the fact that sakoda just. started yelling at him? amazing. this made me cry again. like yeah sakodas been watching him… what azamis doing isn’t child’s play! he’s right! and sakoda knows all of this bc he’s been caring abt that kid for forever!! to the point that he’ll yell at the yakuza head like this bc he cares that much!!!

and azami is like. god. I rly love the way he was like. so openly resentful. “Since when have you ever been a father to me?! Dont pull that shit on me now!” ouch. so true though.

and the. the way that uh. “Wh-what are you bowing for? This asshole doesn’t deserve—“ you can HEAR the trembling in his voice. he’s holding back tears. sakyo bowing FOR azami is so good. like I think this scene hit me so hard bc like both sakoda and sakyo who have the lives they do now mostly in thanks to the ginsenkai, are like… sticking up for azami. who is fifteen and thus hasn’t really Given them anything but like his presence. and they care enough about him to stick up for him anyways.

anyways I hadn’t thought abt this until now but it’s like huh… yeah no wonder azami made something up. he wouldn’t want to talk abt sakyo in front of sakyo bc that would be like admitting he still cared abt him. and he didn’t want to talk abt his parents in front of sakyo bc uh. it would be complicated ofc. like in his boyhood collage he was like oh I don’t even remember why I ran away, but shift was probably frustrated and stuff. but like clearly azamis mom had just recently died at that point. he probably just didn’t want to talk about that.

the reveal that the magic brush he uses on kumon was his mothers makeup brush, though… like the way it was her cheek blush to make herself look less sick. and he does the same thing for kumon years later. it just makes it… so much more affectionate. ”I wanted to use its magic to make someone happy like that again. I wanted to do for someone else what I could no longer do for my mom.” and YOU DID!!!

and then his bio dad’s response to all of this. “well, aren’t you all just making me out to be some evil villain. you think there’s a parent out there who doesn’t want to support his child’s dreams?” yes. yes absolutely.

and the way his reasoning is just like. he just thought azami was making up excuses to run away from the family. that uh. that’s not. true… ugh this part is what made me so frustrated. like azami, after his portrait, so very specifically asserts that’s he’s his son and because of that he’ll do anything for him and ginsenkai family. and it’s like. Yeah. I know what it’s like to be so aware of your position as someone’s child and know that even as you hate them you will also do anything for them even if they won’t recognize that. like… he never even asked. azami was so pissed about getting his makeup trashed that he literally ran away and didn’t come back. and you’re still assuming oh it was a little side hobby, if he REALLY cared about it he would’ve, what, psychic mind beamed the force of his feelings to you? if you had paid attention like sakyo or sakoda you would’ve clearly seen how long and how deeply he’s loved it for. even if it had been for a short time how would you know it wouldn’t grow into something else, anyways. like acting.

also his “study your ass off and aim for the top.” line about makeup and then when he gifts him the makeup set later… good on him for personally buying that stuff. but that line left such a sour taste for me bc it’s like. ugh… honestly it just hit a sore spot bc I remember my parents being like. hi child. you can do like, anything you want supposedly but if you want to do like Anything in the humanities field or arts field you’ll have to be the top 1% of it otherwise you’ll die alone. so like if you’re not good enough to do that just quit (I am implying you’re not good enough). and it’s just like. idk. the sort of implications that if azamis not like the best at makeup ever and also that if he hadn’t chosen to do it bc of his mother and it was just something he Liked, then that reason wouldn’t be enough…? that’s just the vibe I get.

also azamis bio dad being like sigh I’ll tell sayuri you’ve become a strong independent man instead of the family head. it just rly irks me like. even now it felt like hey old man. are you looking more at your dead wife than you’re looking at your actual child. because that’s what it feels like.

anyways idk. I hope azami has more space later in life to be a bit more resentful bc I think he deserves it, yknow? I think the way the whole thing went down like, Made Sense bc why would that guy like admit he had hurt his son… that’s like. unrealistic. so I don’t think the story was written badly or anything. it just made me like. really sad. azami didn’t end up loudly crying (im not counting the wailing he has to do in the play for his dead dad.) and like that makes sense to me. actually I think it was very Cool Of Him to never lose his composure That Badly. uh and he’s going to do great considering he as a middle schooler is like rolling normally with college students. but I just want him to be like. feel safe even when he’s not excelling, yknow?

I fear I lost the plot or rambled a bit too hard there at the end, so sorry if it’s incoherent!! I rly like azami!! this was a very good story. im also ridiculously excited for winter.

HUH OH. SORRY ABOUT THAT LMAO. a3 relatability strikes again?

let's go into it!

dFKJDFKLFDJ zombie fun night is perfect. Banri is really being a good leader and figuring out how to have Azami engage with what they're going to do it's just. god Banri is good.

HELPP. Tenma scaredycat, but also for the lizard thing, so valid, i would do the same. AND HELP for the necklace. This is so funny. and yeah Azami's makeup skills truly are shining there! DLKFJDKLFJD being so used to a3 dropping emotional bombs that this just ended up being funny makes it even softer. But yeah agreed on the way Banri coaches him and still encourages him even though it's obvious Azami doesn't feel the same way about theater yet. For Banri who went from uninterested to "this is my whole life actually", it must be jarring to look at this past mirror, but even more reasons to take it easy.

God the Omi and Azami scene was so good. (friend was staring into oblivion during this whole scene and then cursed me. I would love to be all awww but i couldn't stop laughing.)

But yeah it was so nice that like, so many of them worked together in trying to help out? like it really shows that they're really all a family and a community now, and they'll try to help with their newest members as well. AND AWW. yeah Summer is happiness itself. always missing them. even Azami cannot resist them.

BUT YEAH Azami's awkwardness aroound Omi is just. man. Exactly as you say, it's just, difficult to approach right. but yeah it does serve to justify why it goes smoothly with Kumon on the other hand. Omimi's portrait… just, absolutely heartbreaking again as always. I wonder if Omi did take a break when he was being a delinquant and therefore is doubling down on being of service because he still feels guilty for this time. or if him joining the theater troupe is his vision of taking a break since it means his family has to handle things on their own. Or maybe like Juza and Taichi he's just being too hard on himself.

JUZA SO GOOD. ALWAYS.

and here's the meat of it! yes that CGI was so good man. You really feel just how important Azami is to Sakyo in that image. Also if i recall correctly, Kumon panicked over the phone so they really all expected it to be bad while it was just, Kumon panicking, which somewhat makes it even funnier to me. Anyway. Sakyo good dad. that's all i'd say. god this scene is so emo. AND YESS SOBS THE CARDS STUFF. IT'S GENUINELY SO EMO. Azami not able to believe Sakyo would care this much while of course Sakyo does, come on and it's just. god this arc. God the whole way you describe Azami's thoughtprocess is bringing me to tears. I feel like this is exactly how he felt it yeah. Sakyo is worrying about how he "betrayed" Azami by leaving while Azami would have been just fine with it if it didn't feel like Sakyo was abandonning him and only thinking of him as a duty, and it's just. godd. and goddd the way you describe the rest i'm just. soso emo. They really have a neat relationship, a hurt neither of them were able to explain to the other and therefore they hurt one another like that, but they genuinely care so much and want to be part of each other's lives and and y'know what Azami maybe Sakyo is the only dad you need.

SUMMER SO COOL YEAH!! And yeah the play is pretty nice, though yeah. I guess with Azami at makeup they tried new hair things but Taichi's hair stayed too red for it all smh! but i guess in a huge theater it might not matter so much.

SAKODA IS SOOOO GOOD, UNSUNG MVP OF THIS EPISODE. yeah for Tenma's "i always repay my debts" it's about how Autumn helped Kumon out, so Summer is going to help Autumn and Azami out as well basically. And yeah Tenma definitely see them as a team, he's Natsugumi's leader and therefore he speaks for and takes debts for all of Natsugumi. What a lad. But Natsugumi did such a good job and i love how hard they helped on this one. truly MVPs.

Also yes i love how all of Autumn was ready to fight except Taichi who was nervous, but i love even more that it's Taichi who comes up with the plan on how to infiltrate the base. Really reminding us that he was with the "Bad Boys" because of spy related crimes by how he can come up with plans to infiltrate stuff, but also i love this so much. It's kinda where i started to have my headcanon of "Taichi is scaryingly smart when it comes to illegal stuff". Like the idea of Taichi messing up say, simple math, but coming up with an infiltration plan that would even have Chikage pause is one of my favorit headcanons ever, and it all started because of this.

BUT YES THE CG WAS SO GODDAMN PERFECT. IT'S ONE OF MY FAV CG EVER IT'S SO FUNNY. And with the song in the back, it was GLORIOUS. i'm glad you liked Respawn!!!! it's such a neat song! Also i need to share this stage video: https://www.tumblr.com/icharchivist/708632707674079232?source=share

BUT YEAH it was so funny and i lOVE that they were dedicated in like, actually playing their animals like. dguys you didn't HAVE to. you're just so funny. AND JUZA'S "BEAAAR", it's so good. I love them so much.

Sakoda MPV <33333 he really does take care of Azami so well it's really soft.

And yeah Summer's exhaustion is a nice detail. god it makes me wonder for how long they went on, a wonder the public didn't get weirded out by it.

AND SOBS YEAH AZAMI'S SPEECH. YEAH. And also the "maybe it's because i have two assholes dad that i turned into such an asshole" with a bright smile on his face. god he's so good.

And eheheh for Shift, but, yeah. yeah…. AND SAKODA REALLY GOOD. and please just let them having some vkei related play it's all good!! it's worth it!! maybe this time none of you would oppose Juza wearing a dress if the whole thing is about being scared he wouldn't look feminine enough smh!! AND LDKJFKLDFJD MASUMI'S RARE INDIVIDUALISTIC MOMENT.

AND THAT ENDING!!! yeah < > are for foreign languages in general, and in their case it's their native one. But finally. Guy teasing just to build up to it now!!!

Ok so, now, Azami's dad.

"my dad who's not Sakyo" i love that we're carrying it on on "Real Dad Sakyo" and "Not Sakyo Dad", it says everything.

And i'm all good with the oversharing as long as you're comfortable with it, and man. Yeah i feel you on that, my family is pretty much the same. I've also had my family like, throw out or destroy my stuff, important stuff, either without my knowledge or in front of me, so to say i felt Azami really hard would be an understatement. It's a whole level of violation that is just, really hard to swallow and forgive. Impossible even.

Honestly the whole writings over the problematic dads of Mankai, in the whole story, is so conflicting to me in general. I feel like. The issue is that most of the bad parents we meet don't have anything else going for them, the only thing we know about them per se is their function in society, and that they're bad with their kids. They're tools for their kids's backstory more than actual people. And i feel like Azami's dad actually sounds like a real person. A conflicting, messed up person with his own issues, and that ends up hurting Azami as a result. There's a difficulty to reconcile how the dad took good care of Sakyo as a kid for instance, to how he behaved with Azami, and it's really unnerving in general. And as such it puts Sakyo in a position of wanting to defend the man because he owes him so much, and it's difficult to blame him for that, but as a result Azami loses one of his major support.

Honestly my feelings about Azami's dad are complicated. I believe he's the one father of Mankai who can actually realistically work on his issues and improves his relationship with Azami. I believe he cares for Azami on some level more than just material (in opposition to how i'd consider Tenma's, who cared for his carreer more, and Masumi's, who only cared when he needed to fill his divorce's loneliness, and well, Misumi's don't care.). So i end up believing there is a possibility still for this relationship to improve in a realistic way that doesn't feel just like a deus ex machina like the others dads have been. but god, this particular brand of neglect and mistreatment truly also struck a core with me and therefore i can't totally go unbiased about it and ends up just, uncomfortable and unsure. It's so complicated.

Mostly i'd say my different approach is that, even if Tenma, Masumi or Misumi wants to work things out with their dad, i would be completely opposed to it. Purely "why the fuck, no, that's not worth it" at them. But if Azami wants to work it out it's like. "Fine. just stay safe, know you can remove yourself from it whenever you feel like it, and remember to be yourself, and bail out anytime something would go out of hands". yaknow?

But yeah i agree i feel like it really puts Azami in a position of hypervigilence. Everything had to always be a secret, calculated, you only show to your father what you're ready to defend, and it would make some stuff like romance or passions in general, stuff that leaves you emotionally vulnerable, as something that's just too much risk for very little reward. So you just closes in completely.

so Sakyo being there and actually showing him that he can just be himself and he doesn't have to worry more ahead of it is meaningful because yeah, like you say, it gives him a parental figure who is actually willing to let him experiment and be free without having to always be prepared to defend why you want to do something.

“after seeing my boss, I get the feeling there’s no dad out there who doesn’t care about his kids.” i actually really hate this line in a sense, i know Sakyo is mostly just, extrapolating to what he's seeing now, but i hate it on a personal level. I do think Azami's dad cares for Azami, but yeah exactly like you said, like Homare's grandma, his own issues means he hurt Azami in ways that are ways too deep for love to just be enough. Sometimes parents love you and hurt you more than a parent who would merely tolerate you. Because they love you so much they want to make sure you're well fitted to the world and ends up messing you up as a result.

But yeah god, i'm glad we're on the same page, you can't say "all dads care for their kids" when you're living with those kids, and Misumi's in particular. This makes me see so red. I get Sakyo has a personal bias here but giod. but yeah Sakyo probably only knows about Masumi's and yeah, Masumi's dad was reasonable at the end that he might work it out. but also like, didn't Sakyo's dad abandon hm and his mom?! that the whole reason his mom had a hard time in life was because of that? bc i don't remember if Sakyo's absent dad is due to abandon or death. Bc if it's abandon, i feel like Sakyo shouldn't be the one saying all dad cares yaknow? I still think that, the Wastonian reasons of it all, is because Sakyo owes so much to the Boss that he tries to rationalize things in his favor yaknow? But the Doylist reason, i think, is mostly that the one weakness of a3's writing is truly with how they manage to create realistic scenarios of abuses and the way it affects the kids, but then they want to solve it with the parents going "my bad", and the problem is that it's not how coping with abuse works yaknow.

SAKODA IS SOOO COOL HERE YEAH. Like man, the glow up Sakoda got in this arc with how much he would go to hell for this kid and fight the devil himself if he had to. god. unsung mvp.

Azami is totally entitled to throw that at his father's face, go Azami go.

" sakyo bowing FOR azami is so good. like I think this scene hit me so hard bc like both sakoda and sakyo who have the lives they do now mostly in thanks to the ginsenkai, are like… sticking up for azami. who is fifteen and thus hasn’t really Given them anything but like his presence. and they care enough about him to stick up for him anyways. " OGHHH SO TRUE. THIS IS REALLY SO. SO GOOD.

and you're right about Azami's collage being the way it was. It makes sense Azami just didn't want to share this vulnerability, especially with Sakyo, at a point where he still believed Sakyo didn't care for him on top of that. It's really just. man.

SOBS AND YEAH FOR THE MAGIC BRUSH….

"and then his bio dad’s response to all of this. “well, aren’t you all just making me out to be some evil villain. you think there’s a parent out there who doesn’t want to support his child’s dreams?” yes. yes absolutely. " DJFHDL LEGIT. GOD.

But yeah i feel you on everything else you mention about Azami's dad it's just. Acting like Azami was at fault for not making it clear he was serious, while also making the environment too hostile for Azami to even come out and say that. He's responsible for how Azami couldn't trust him and then he blames Azami for not trusting him in a sense. It's really frustrating, and it feels like he's deflecting the blame, while also kinda taking the blame itself. I'm glad he's trying to fix things, and i do think he feels guilty, but it's still so sour.

and i'm so sorry your parents made you feel all those things :( but yeah i totally get what you mean on how it relates to Azami. It's just so unfair to put on him the pressure to be the best of the best.

In a sense i feel it fits a lot of the thematic of Autumn of like… The reasons they have Regrets to start with is because of the expectations people have put on them, whenever it is over their abilities (Banri) or their appearance (Juza) or their age (Sakyo) ect. And i feel like Azami is in this situation where he's about to regret it if he doesn't take his own life in between his hands. He has to break free from those expectations and fights for what he wants. but god. He shouldn't have to fight for it. ig you can't expect Yakuza to do things the easy way, but god he really shouldn't have to fight for it it makes me so sad.

"are you looking more at your dead wife than you’re looking at your actual child" so true unfortunately hhhh.

But yeah i hope Azami gets more ways to process everything later on :/

I do think that, out of all the bad fathers' plotline, like i said, this is the most realistic one in a sense, and i do think it's well written in general. And i do think that when it comes to abused/neglected kids and their parents, there is also just… i know online the consensus is "children should just cut ties with their toxic parents" and i get how it's the easiest way to see it, to free yourself for good for the influence, but it comes with its own type of downsides that are rarely discussed and is also a lot of pressure to put on a kid. Obviously, if it's too toxic it SHOULD be the case, like i said, chara like Misumi in particular are better off moving past it, but i feel like, in Azami's situation, where despite all the hurt and all the pain, Azami still definitely see his father as a human whom he wants to work things out with… It's just really complicated. I have really messy feelings about all of this.

I do hope Azami would manage to be more resentful and end up being able to actually discuss with his dad and challenge him like, no, YOUR behavior was truly fucked up, it's not fair to ask of ME to communicate my feelings better when you never tried to listen, yaknow?

Anyway i do feel like this sort of… complicated messy conflicting feelings of resentment and yet wanting to work it out that is in Azami and his father's storyline, for how fucked up his father is, actually works very well and is very realistic, even if there would be wishes for Azami not to bother at all for it. I feel like it allows Azami the grace of having really mixed feelings about all of this without going to one extreme or the next about how to be with his father, and it's something i really personally connected with, as someone with a very difficult relationship with my family, who thought cutting ties was my best solution at some point, and now as an adult, have to deal with how while i could never ever forgive them, the other extreme isn't satisfying to me, on multiple levels. I don't like his father, but i want Azami to be able to work it out in the way he would consider satisfying, and i think that the story is written in a way that leaves this approach possible and addresses it as such, in a way i think the others bad dads of Mankai get too much of a free pass. but man. messy. And with the patern of bad dads getting off too easily this can come up as much more sour than the conflicting feelings it could have actually worked on if the others dads were treated accordingly imo.

Azami's storyarc genuinely did hit hard for me as well because of that. He's not a chara i particularly relate to outside of this specific plotline but this plotline hits not only very deep, but on mixed feelings that are hard for me to face in fiction, so it's always hard to look at.

On the light hearted side, my friend we talked about was cursing me the whole storyarc bc of how he related to Azami and then Azami's portrait happened and he genuinely just went "okay you know what fuck you" and was so emotionally damaged by the mirror that i could forget for a bit my own pain by letting him suffer a bit. Terrible friend moment.

Anyway!!! it's all good, i'm glad you did ramble, it was really nice to read and well, it's interesting things to think about, even if the conclusion isn't easily clear cut.

I'm really glad you liked Azami and his story!!!

And ehehe Winter soon <3333

And "Conquering Misoshiosa Island!" first!

Take care and always feel free to ramble <333

#ichareply #long post for ts #ichafantalks a3 #aranarumei

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silently-waiting-for-you · 1 year

Text

Marvel

Trope: irondad fluff

boogie woogie woogie

Peter doesn’t call Mr.Stark dad out loud, that’d be weird. He doesn’t even call him Tony out loud very much. He’s not even on first name basis out loud. It’s just, you don’t have to say things out loud when fate- or some exploding evil nazi science equipment- decides you should hear each other's thoughts.

(I haven’t seen many fics about the moment ‘the kid’ turned into ‘my kid’ for Tony, so I wanted to write one from Peter’s pov)

. . . . .

carrer day

“Hey, sorry I’m late,” Peter’s enhanced senses picked up the familiar voice from outside the door. “I had a meeting this morning, and then I got lost looking for the class… anyway, I’m here for Peter? Peter Parker?”

He frowned at hearing his name, still unsure what exactly was going on. He watched as his teacher continued to stand and stare out the door for a minute before seemingly remembering herself and taking a step back.

“Of course! If you could just go sit next to him until your turn, he’s in the back on the right side.”

The man stepped through the door and Peter gaped with the rest of the class as Tony Stark, in his signature suit and goatee, sporting a pair of red sunglasses and carrying a suitcase walked through the door.

Prompt: Okay but what abt Tony going in to Peter’s school for career day? Like where the parents talk abt their jobs?

. . . . .

flu shot chronicles

Morgan Stark does not like shots. Neither does Peter Parker.

. . . . .

happy halloween, mr. stark

The first time Peter and Tony spend Halloween together, it isn’t exactly planned.

Tony just sort of...shows up, knocks on the door and grins wide when Peter opens it.

''Mister Stark? What are you doing here?''

. . . . .

hours of horror, black and white edition

“That’s not—” he’s instantly protesting. “You’re a liar! A dirty, dirty liar, Miss Potts.”

“I thought our philosophy is we aren’t going to lie to our children?”

“It is! Yet here you are spilling all my secrets faster than—”

Pepper puts out her palm, silencing him. “Please refrain from pop culture references, there’s only so much I can take in a day.”

“Aah, Pepper; you’re no fun. I had a hunch he was gonna quote something from Buzzfeed Unsolved.” his kid pouts.

***

Or, an October tradition where Peter and Ned and MJ watch old horror films and it's the Starks' turn to host

. . . . .

i will soften every edge

“You’re telling me,” he swallowed, “that my body thinks I’m Peter’s dad?”

“And it has prepared itself for parenthood in response, yes.”

After a simple brain scan, F.R.I.D.A.Y. reveals something that Tony already knew, but may not have been ready to accept. Luckily, Peter's always there to help him re-find his footing.

. . . . .

in an empty moral space

“Bring Spider-Man to us, Mr. Stark,” High-heels says and rattles off an address. “If that bug isn’t here in the next twenty four hours, then your intern gets it. We are not going to ask a second time.”

There’s a pause.

Then, “You want Spider-Man?”

“In exchange for your intern,” High-heels affirms.

“Spider-Man,” Mr. Stark repeats. He sounds more amused than worried for Peter’s apparent safety.

also known as: Peter Parker is held hostage…in order to get to Spider-Man. Throw in some Accords reconciliation and, well, Peter’s life just got a whole lot weirder.

. . . . .

lifesize

Morgan’s little fists are shaking in front of her, grasping at nothing. She quickly moves aside as Tony is now standing directly in front of the tent. Morgan's small jumps where she is standing are overflowing with anticipation. Pepper stands next to her as Tony eyes the tent in front of him, newspaper in hand.

“Alright, little miss," he says with a breath, looking down at her, "what’s the drill? How do you want us to handle this?”

“All the tea party guests have to survive.”

“10-4. Pep,” he says as he looks up at her, “you ready?”

“Oh, no. You’ve got this one.”

Tony stares at her for a moment, his deadpan expression way funnier than it should be.

Morgan tells Tony there's a spider in her tent. Newspapers, surprises, and uncontrollable laughter ensues.

. . . . .

mutants

All teachers dread parent-teacher night. This one's worse than usual.

Feat. Boundaries? I don't know this word. He's not my boyfriend! Flash Thompson's A+ parents Tony and Peter are enormous nerds Gym class is important Oh my God, what's that in the bio lab

and many more

. . . . .

not really an intern

Field trip trope - yeah.

After the near-end of the universe, Stark Tower reopens to tour groups. Midtown is invited to be the first.

Includes: fluff, mostly fluff let's be real. Irondad. Peter and Morgan bonding because I love them.

. . . . .

stark’s home for wayward animals

“Peter?” he calls. “That you looming around in the dark and falling on your ass?”

“Uh.” Peter’s voice. Two more meows.

“Are you meowing at me?” Tony asks, weaving around the wet spots on the ground. “Is this happening? Is there something you wanna tell me?”

“I’m—I’m not.”

Tony narrows his eyes and turns the corner. Peter is splayed out on the third stair, in his Spiderman suit sans the mask, soaked to the bone. His hair is plastered to his forehead, he’s shivering, and he’s holding a gray cat clutched to his chest.

Tony stares at him. Both Peter and the cat are looking at him, wide-eyed, and then the cat meows again, breaking the silence.

“What’s happening right now?” Tony asks.

. . . . .

that's how you and i will be

Tony cuddles babies.

Tony Stark cuddles babies.

Iron Man is good with babies.

No matter which way Peter tries to spin this newfound knowledge in his mind, it still doesn’t make sense.

. . . . .

the moon and stars (and gummy worms where they shouldn't be)

Peter has a problem. Mr. Stark is his father. Not his surrogate father, but his actual legitimate father. Peter wants to tell him, but he’s afraid of being rejected because he’s not really ‘heir’ material. He’s just an intern. He’s just Spider-Man. He thinks he could tell Mr. Stark if he was certain Mr. Stark already loved him like a son, but Peter just can’t be sure, that is, until Ned comes up with a plan.

Peter brings Tony crazy things to eat so he can evaluate his reactions.

. . . . .

tony stark needs sleep squad

Once this became a habit, Rhodey had created a very exclusive club that only the people closest to Tony were a part of. He called it the ‘Tony Stark Needs Sleep Squad’. It was an illustrious group with only three members. The name was wordy but the purpose was clear. The dang idiot needed to sleep.

. . . . .

trope: hair playing

Tony Stark may or may not be upset about having to 'lay low' in a shitty motel of the interstate. Peter Parker may or may not be upset about having to drastically change his appearance.

Red-coloured fluff ensues.

. . . . .

two left feet

“Mr. Stark?”

“How many times do I have to tell you that it’s okay to call me Tony?”

Peter at least has the decency to look sheepish at this and shrugs. “Sorry... Tony. Anyway, I know your wedding to Miss. Po—Pepper—is coming up soon and I know you told me Michelle can come as my date, which I’m super thankful for, like super-super thankful, but I was wondering... like... I dunno, could you...?”

“Peter, I have absolutely no idea where you’re going with this or what you’re asking me to do. You gotta give me something here, kid.”

“Canyouteachmehowtodance?”

. . . . .

resurrection

Thanos wins, for a time.

One year later, Peter wakes up in the woods.

. . . . .

sick days and other lies

Midtown High is going on a field trip to Stark Industries and Peter Parker will not be attending. That is, he thinks he won't be, but everything in the world seems to be against him. It's hard leading a double life before you're old enough to vote!

. . . . .

a symphony of color

The first thing Peter does once he can effectively maneuver the compound with his crutches is find a notebook that can fit in his pocket. He grabs a pen from one of the many junk drawers and starts a list of everyone he’s talked to so far.

Mr. Stark - Brown, the filling in cinnamon buns, the teddy bear in the baby photo hanging on the fridge.

Aunt May - Dusty pink, Grandma Parker’s old couch.

Pepper - Silver, fancy necklace chains, handcuffs.

He taps the end of the pen against his chin. He needs to talk to more people.

---

Peter wakes up with synesthesia after a fight.

. . . . .

we're not trying to reinvent the backpack here (mark 1-9)

When Peter sheepishly asked if Mr. Stark would buy him a new backpack, he did not expect his mentor to spend weeks on end trying to make the best backpack in the world for a superhero-kid.

He didn't expect that much effort, but he definitely should have.

. . . . .

what’s up, grandpa?

On the off chance Tony is out and comes across someone who doesn't recognize him, it's not too out of the ordinary for someone to mistake him and Peter for father and son. It's a mistake that he loves, a mistake that warms his heart. Because as far as he's concerned, Peter is his kid and always will be.

And when he has another kid, a small and tiny baby girl, the mistake keeps happening. People still think Peter is Tony's son.

He just isn't prepared for people to think Morgan is his granddaughter.

. . . . .

who's the baby now?

after an accident in the laboratory, Tony Stark finds himself aged down to roughly a year old. Which wouldn’t be so bad, except he quickly discovers that his brain hasn’t entirely been taken over by a drooling colorful mush and shards of his grown-up conscience leak through. Which makes it all the more boggling when Pepper invites Peter over, ‘to babysit’.

”Mr. Stark’s a baby!” Peter squeaked, mouth gaping. At the sound of his protege’s voice, Tony dived over to the door of the playpen. What the hell was Pepper playing at?!

#irondad #irondad and spiderson #spiderman #spiderson #iron man #peter parker #tony stark

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