#I'm really happy you guys are interested!

[romypearl]

The Queen's Pawn - Regina George/Oblivious!Reader | II

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven

Summary: Everyone is interested and obsessed with Regina George, after all, she is the queen of the North Shore, so why does Y/N barely look at her? The new student, oblivious to her existence, intrigues and irritates the blonde at the same time. And she doesn't know how to deal with it.

Classification: Fluff

Warnings: Slight internalized homophobia

Word count: +2200

Unrevised

She's always liked strawberries. Sweet, soft and tickling the roof of mouth. And, coincidentally, every now and then it turns pink.

Like the remnants of ice cream that hang around the corner of Y/N's plump lips.

It's hard to ignore, is what Regina tells herself as she turns away, trying to find a random fixed point to distract her. What proves to be more than impossible, out of the corners of her eyes she watches a little speech about Greek culture, something about Stoicism and a guy called Zeno, she doesn't really know, can't pay attention in the long words, only and exclusively in that spot. How could the Miss Perfect and Retainer of All Knowledge miss something so silly? The blonde huffs and crosses her arms in frustration, how has no one seen this yet? The Plastics seemed indifferent, pretending to pay attention to the matter while typing messages, knowing that their respective partners would do all the work for them and be grateful. She had no such luck. When Mrs. Blake, inspired by the... variety of grades, announced that she was going to pair up for assignments, she was sure that had guaranteed a top mark and a pat on the back for the minimal effort, equivalent to a zero. It would have been like that, if she hadn't made Karen switch papers to have Y/N as partner. After all, if she's so clever could easily get an A for both, but it backfired.

"What the hell kind of word is Eudaimonia?" she finally asks, frowning in confusion.

"Did you pay attention to anything I said?"

"All the things you say are very boring." Regina shrugs and turns so that they're face to face "Just like you."

She waits for some reaction, ever since they started studying about an hour ago Regina teases her and pulls all the strings in search of the right one, the one that will snap her out of the calm state of mind or hit her in some way. Nothing. She's rather unreachable. And, just like the other times, totally ignores the petty comment.

"But..." she hates doing it, every lousy second "Can you tell me what it is?"

"Right! For the last time..." Y/N settles back in chair and takes another spoonful of ice cream to mouth, thinking about how to summarize what she's been trying to say for a long time "Eudaimonia is a term from Greek philosophy that means a state of happiness and inner well-being. In literal translation it is "the state of being inhabited by a good daemon, a good genius"."

"Daemon?" I'm getting more and more lost "Did the Greeks believe in that?"

"No, it's daemons, not demons." the newbie's monotonous tone becomes animated as she starts talking, which makes Regina's heart skip a beat and she doesn't like it "In Greek mythology, they were spiritual beings who occupied an intermediate place between gods and humans, they could be either benevolent or malevolent..."

Then another speech begins, this time she tries to pay attention, but gradually the words blur into disconnected sentences and all she can focus on is how they sound on the girl's lips, how she pronounces them, her tongue curling between pearly teeth, the soft sound and, still, that damn ice cream. She tries to remember the last time she ate one, it seems like months, maybe years. What did it taste like? Overly sweet and sickly? Smooth and addictive? Why did her mother have to interrupt them and offer a dozen options? And why did she have to choose just that? Tempting. Lovely. Irresistible.

Y/N gasps in surprise and freezes in place as she suddenly feels something soft pressed against the corner of her mouth, thumb rubbing something that is apparently resisting coming out and her eyes meet sky blue irises, staring at her obstinately. The touch is long, almost purposeful, and they don't realize they're holding breath, unaware of their surroundings, too caught up in each other to notice the curious gazes of the two lackeys.

To everyone's surprise, including her own, Regina rubs the stain, picking up some of the gloss in the process, and brings to her lips, sucking it off. She has to hold back a groan and fight against her body to keep composure, pretending not to be shaken by her own impulsive, totally thoughtless, act.

"If my face was so dirty, you could simply have warned me." she says after a long, thoughtful pause, unable to find any conceivable reason except that "But I appreciate your gesture, it was really kind."

Kind? Has anyone, at any time in life, used that word to refer to her? Maybe her dad, once, just after Kylie was born and before they lost control completely. But there was nothing kind about what she had done, quite the opposite.

"Do you want more?" the blonde points to the almost empty bowl, anxious to mask the situation quickly.

"No, thanks!"

"How about Doritos?"

"I think I've eaten too much junk food today, it can't be good for me." Y/N jokes and opens a big smile, making cheeks stand out along with dimples that are almost imperceptible to inattentive eyes.

"We have strawberries." she says immediately, not stopping to think about those soft lips around the red fruit. When Gretchen looks at her in confusion and frowns, trying to subtly point, the plan comes back to mind and she decides to put it into practice "Also blueberries, raspberries, blackberries. Whatever you like, sweetie."

"You really like berries."

"You can't blame me..." Regina leans on the table, one hand on chin, long eyelashes batting slowly and a smirk, the same one that has won over every boy she's ever wanted "When is your color."

"What do you mean?" the other asked, without even looking up from the papers, missing all the theatrics.

"Red is your color..."

"My favorite color is yellow." she finally abandons the notes, only to find George defeated in front of her, about to slam her head on the glass table to get out of this nightmare "Can I use your bathroom?"

"Of course!" Regina snorts and points towards the corridor "Second door on the right, don't get lost."

Secretly, George hopes, wishes, that she really would get lost so that she could finally have the opportunity to guide her through something, or simply talk to her without two ticks on their backs. When she wants to, Gretchen can be very... clingy and insistent, often taking the brunette as a side effect, not unexpected considering how insecure she is about herself and the stability of her position in the hierarchy of North Shore, a drone that takes pride of function. Most of the time it's acceptable, in fact her presence barely matters to the queen bee in ordinary situations, but now all she wants is for the two of them to disappear at the snap of a finger.

"Karen, Gretchen, I need you to do me a favor." Regina is direct, in a casual tone.

"Of course! What do you need?" Wieners replies promptly, always eager to please.

"Can you go to the convenience store and get some Redbulls?" she smiles and stands up, taking one of the credit cards out of the purse, tossing it for them to take "All the flavors you can find."

"Now?"

"Yes, now. And get some more ice cream too."

They exchange glances, but don't dare deny Regina anything, even if it means half an hour's walk "Right, we're going."

The pair get up and leave quickly, holding their tongues to avoid questioning her about the sudden request, nor about what seems to be an interest in the newbie. Right from the first day, they listed her as a loser, with no social sense and who no one would have the courage to touch without a ten-foot pole, so they didn't understand why she insisted on winning her over. And they had no idea that she would have her as a partner in history and now visiting the George mansion.

Regina smiles triumphantly. The living room is finally quiet and she can turn her attention completely to the plan, she didn't feel shy or pressured to succeed around them, but didn't have all the attention from Y/N as she can have without silly questions and random celebrity gossip. It's the perfect moment.

She stares at herself in the mirror above the fireplace and fixes the smallest details of appearance so that she looks flawless.

"Gina!" her mother calls out from the kitchen, walking briskly into the room, and she rolls her eyes, before feeling blood run cold at the sight of her companion "What a adorable girl! She even offered to help me in the kitchen."

"Mom..." she mutters between teeth, trying to keep composed as her mother steps forward, arms around Y/N's shoulders "She's here to study."

"Oh, of course, of course! Studying is important." June says with a mischievous smile and finally lets her go "Studying what? Human anatomy?" and winks suggestively at her daughter, causing a wave of embarrassment and annoyance.

"Mom!" Regina exclaims, face burning with embarrassment, hoping that the girl won't pay any attention to her mother. At least she didn't offer condoms like last time, which didn't embarrass her like it does now "It's history."

"And philosophy." Y/N adds.

"A lot less interesting, but still important." the woman continues, not letting herself be put down, and turns to the visitor "Darling, would you like something to drink? Juice? Lemonade? More ice cream?"

Y/N, not at all affected by the expansive and slightly invasive personality, nods and opens a shy smile "A juice would be great, thank you."

"Perfect!" June hurries off to the kitchen, but not before taking one last meaningful look at her firstborn, who blushes visibly.

Regina sighs heavily and sits down at the table, this time next to her classmate, trying to regain control of the situation.

"Sorry about that. Sometimes my mom is a bit much."

"It's okay!" Y/N replies, settling into the soft chair, and goes back to concentrating on the notes scattered across the surface. In an almost imperceptible movement, she adjusts her glasses, which the blonde hadn't even noticed were resting on the top of head, and puts them on face, completely transforming her appearance "You're lucky."

It's Regina's turn to gasp, barely feeling the surprised sound escape between her lips. She'd deny it to anyone who asked if she thought the girl was beautiful, deny it to death, but there's something differently captivating that prevents her from lying now. The lenses enhance the Y/E/C eyes, making them more penetrating, as if she could see into the soul through them. The sight makes the older's heart race and her palms sweat, having to concentrate not to let it show, let alone appear enchanted.

"Do you wear glasses?"

"Yes, for years, but I was trying to get used to contact lenses." the newbie says, adjusting the frame correctly, sighing with relief "Which turned out to be a disaster."

"They look... good on you." she comments, trying to sound casual and not too anxious, failing miserably as she stares "Your eyes are beautiful."

"Thank you!" Y/N finally lifts her face and catches the queen bee with a simple glance behind the lens along with the amused smile, rare occasion, the same one Janis gets "But they don't work."

Regina laughs at the witty response, finding her perspicacity and humor interesting, very different from what surrounds her in everyday life. She's not afraid to make a joke about herself, when any of the trio would rather fight a bear than do such a thing, making themselves the material for silly and light-hearted jokes. Y/N seems to be completely oblivious to the effect she is causing, Regina's flushed cheeks being nothing more than the result of the warm weather, the friendly laughter aimed at everyone and the hospitality something routine, perhaps an apology for the not so pleasant first meeting. All the compliments, overly embellished and full of hidden intentions, simple acts of politeness, so she remains unaffected and continues to read the manuscripts, without giving the blonde what she so desperately wants.

"You know, the text isn't going to write itself." she laughs and points to the long-forgotten laptop "And I've already made it clear that I'm not going to do everything myself."

With a disbelieving nod, Regina goes back to work, trying to ignore the signals her own body gives off in the presence of the other. It's hard not to be affected by the sweet perfume emanating from inviting skin, the taste of ice cream she wants to try again, the way she seems so at ease and unimpressed in her house, lips puckering as she encounters a paragraph incomprehensible at first reading and now pushing up the stubborn glasses that insist on slipping down her nose. God, all of this is messing with Regina's head in a way she can't explain, there are no plans that could infiltrate all the sinful thoughts that invade her with this privileged view.

She forces herself to concentrate on the task in hand, which tingles as she feels their arms lightly touching, but a part of her desperately craves more of these moments of closeness, even if it means ignoring the voice of reason that screams in her mind that she's not a dyke and wouldn't be for Y/N. It's just a fucking plan. Nothing more than that.

Taglist: @reginassweetheart @chaengluva @avelynpye @bianchiniomg @royalityofmultifandom @lottiematthewsceo @notjaexiee @mayles @l1lass @bridkesby @newyork1432

Join my taglist here ^^

#regina george x reader #mean girls #mean girls 2024 #regina george #renee rapp #fluff #romypearl

[lxnarmoons]

imagining your relationship with ateez!

a/n: i apologize this is so long..... i like to imagine!! i hope you enjoy :3

KIM HONGJOONG→ - this man will write you love songs - ballads, raps, hiphop, yada yada, he'll write songs about you in his freetime - you're on his mind 24/7 so he expresses his ideas with his writing! - depending on your native language, he'll learn it just for you. i def can see him wanting to learn every little thing about you because he loves you - he'll paint your nails for you :D - you once told him you were interested in starting fashion, so he began designing clothes with you - watching him work is amazing, he's kind of a workaholic - when hongjoong is exhausted from working in the studio, you'll sit with him, either sitting in his lap or just being there with him - your presence seems to wipe all the stress off of him - he loves compliments but gets so flustered when you compliment him back - "you're so cute, y/n..." "you're cuter, joongie!" "ohmygody/nstopit" - music brought you two together and it'll keep you two bonded - after he's done working on a few songs, he'll take you to the recording studio so you both can make demos for them!

PARK SEONGHWA→ - seonghwa is lowkey the prince of your dreams. - i know i know i KNOW if you're having a bad day, he'll hold you tight and sing to you, maybe your favorite songs - forehead kisses, making sure you're alright - i feel like out of all the members, he knows how to listen and comfort you - he will do anything that makes you happy. trust me. - "hi, lovey!" he is such a lovey-dovey man.... - bro is HEAD OVER HEELS in love with you!!! and isn't afraid to show it!!!!! - i know he's a sucker for when you call him "hwa," it makes him feel giggly or osmething - if seonghwa's away on tour, he always makes it a priority to call you every night - "dude, not right now, i'm trying to call y/n..." - he just wants to hear your voice, it helps him fall asleep.... you're just so comforting to him - tbh i see him as a little shy when he's with you because he sees you as this really really cool person - especially in front of the other members and they like to tease him - but (I WOULD HOPE) you're really sweet and always know how to make him feel better!

JEONG YUNHO→ - do dog cafes exist? because if so, that would be where you and him left - yunho would LITERALLY wake you up by singing that one song uhhh what's it called - "you are my sunshine / my only sunshine" idk - because yunho is so damn tall, he's kinda like your cuddle buddy - literally he will trap you in his chest while you two are together (big broad chest) - he's soft and gentle; head pats, small kisses everywhere and anywhere - maybe more likely on your neck??/ if that makes you uncomfy, he loves kissing your knuckles - OMG and that cringey thing like kissing your knuckles everytime he sees you - "good morning, princess" - princess treatment princess treatment princess treatment all from mr. jeong yunho!! - mingi finds it incredibly cringey but it's so funny.... he tells yunho to shut up but it never works in the end because yunho will simply kiss your lips to be quiet while you laugh - he loves pda and isn't afraid to show you off to the other members :) always will make you known, no matter what - "guys, this is my partner, y/n. say hi!"

KANG YEOSANG→ - depending on if you like to talk or not, you and yeosang will always be a pair, he listens to you and you listen to him :3 - he's also a little oblivious but it's kind of funny n cute - HELP he's def the most overprotective in terms of your safety - "Y/N, LOVE, I SWEAR-- DO NOT EAT THAT." - you and yeo would be the dumb/dumber duo (IM SORRY THIS IS JUST HOW I THINK OF IT) - you two can be roblox buddies!! - blind leading the blind.... - he likes to run his hands through your hair, maybe braid it (probably really badly.) - he will force you to watch the goofiest cartoons ever. - "y/n-y/n-y/n-y/n-y/n i wanna watch my little pony" or something (mlp is so good) 😭 - rainy day dates!!! - he def has the most atrocious .5s of you in his camera roll.... and vice versa - he's usually really quiet with you.... most of the time it'll just be you and him listening to music - yeosang is your biggest fan boy!! - profession or not, he'll always be cheering you on - "you're doing so good, baby!" and "i love you sososososo much"

CHOI SAN→ - babe. trust me. babe. - he likes to call you babe no matter the time, setting, blah blah blah. he over uses it so much that the members begin to like gag.... - babe and baby !! the other members dont mind baby as much but wooyoung will kick his balls if he says it too much - he loves hand placement. hand on the waist, hand on thighs, hands on butt COUGH COUGH COUGH - san always strives for your comfort! hes the kinda guy who knows what you like and dont like, so when he sees you're uncomfy, it's like a zap and boom- - "baby, you okay?" and if you aren't, "let's get outta here. it's not important." - he could be in the most important meeting of your life and would be more concerned about you!! - imagine late nights with san: romance, horror, comedy movies, whatever they might be, he just wants to stay up late - after the movie's over, you'll either watch another one or you'll simply talk about everything and nothing - cuddles. head on his chest, both of you maybe scrolling on your phones, sorta ignoring each other but enjoying each other's presence - he's very overprotective.... like touch her wrong and i'll beat u up idk - like yeosang, he likes rainy days. dates will involve just watching the rain and giggling stupidly

SONG MINGI→ - NOW IMAGINE THIS MAN MAKING YOU BREAKFAST IN BED - stumbling out of the kitchen in the morning, seeing mingi in the kitchen with his smile - "hi bubba, you hungry?" - I CAN SEE HIM AS BUBBA BECAUSE LIKE he thinks its funny - (me personally) calling him bubba back and pinching his cheeks which makes him giggle - mingi's definitely likes to keep your relationship more private - it'd probably be out there but i feel like he mostly keeps your activities to yourselves (unlike wooyoung.....) - he likes to press his forehead to yours and hold you close to him, mostly because he feels the connection... he likes listening to your heartbeat - so he likes laying on your chest!! he's often dozing off there..... - mingi likes to tease you a lot but always knows your limits, making sure that he doesn't cross any boundaries and accidentally hurting you - IF you have any sort of trauma and/or bad experiences in the past, he likes to listen and just let you vent - when he's writing songs for ateez, he likes to take you with him on the journey - especially if he's recording any new demos!! he'll take you to the recording studio, like hongjoong!!

JUNG WOOYOUNG→ - jung wooyoung is the goddamn most obnoxious person ever - like san, he likes to make it known that you n him are a thing, just not in that overprotective way - arm around your waist or shoulders, yapping to whoever - "hey guys have you met my lovely lovely partner...." - i personally don't see him as a nick/petname kinda guy but if i haddd to guess i would say probably one of those really cringey ones like cupcake..... oh he would def text like that - "hi cupcake" "open your door pls" LMAO - but most of the time he uses your name because he likes it ! - "Y-NNNNN!!" - i see him as a very good listener and somehow always giving the best advice when you need it - he loves spooning you because he gets worried you'd just vanish (idk i see it) but would lowk hold u tightly 😭 - one time he tried to cook for you but ended up setting the ateez stove on fire (hongjoong beat his ass) he wouldn't stop pouting so you forced him to cuddle!!! - yap sessions 24/7, especially if you like to yap - it'd be going back and forth LOL - he also learned how to braid hair for you!! depending if youre fem, masc, or anything else, he likes to braid hair and learned especially for you :)

CHOI JONGHO→ - i just know this man would call you honey - maybe even sweetie but i feel like he would call you honey more - "sweetie, have you eaten today?" jsjgdljklgjksdLJJLKGSADLJ - he would definitely be shy about using it in public, he's not too big on pda, but i think he would warm up to calling you honey/sweetie in front of the others - they lowk tease him and he gets flustered (what a cutueiiee) - even though he might not like touching, i have a feeling he would like cuddling in private - he loves those moments between just you and him - genuinely i can see his favorite date being the photobooths..... like imagine putting bear ears on him and that gummy smile of his jklldsgds :c - he loves to see you smile and laugh, so even if he despises the ears or whatever accessories you force on him, he can't help but laugh along because he loves to see you happy - if you're sad, he'll do all this goofy stuff just to make you smile - jongho, like all members, is constantly making sure you're okay, like "how did you sleep?" n "are you feeling okay?" - GENTLEMANnnNNN - karaoke nights are just filled with him singing you love songs - help i cant remember if he likes to cook but if he does he would cook (like mingi!!) - he likes forehead kisses. case closed.

#ateez #ateez x reader #ateez imagines #ateez fanfic #ateez fic #atz #atiny #hongjoong #hongjoong x reader #seonghwa #seonghwa x reader #yunho #yunho x reader #yeosang #yeosang x reader #san #san x reader #mingi #mingi x reader #wooyoung #wooyoung x reader #jongho #jongho x reader #ateez fluff #ateez au #imagine #fluff

[venusjaynie]

baby names

chris sturniolo x fem!reader

summary: a cute little scenario about discussing possible baby names with you husband chris.

cw: pregnancy, a lot of dialogue

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"what about... chris junior?" your husband turns to you with a smirk.

"we've been over this. he is not having your name." you say with an exasperated eye roll, though you don't fight the smile that graces your lips.

"i know, baby, i'm just teasin'. and bernard is definitely out?" you stare at him blankly in response.

"i know you aren't even serious about that." he just laughs at you. his laughter dies down and the two of you sit in a comfortable silence, with chris slowly rubbing your bump. you're around the 5 month mark now, and you couldn't be more excited, however the discussion of a name has been long winded, and hasn't just included you and chris. "what was nick's suggestion again?"

"nick originally said jimmy, which i vetoed. i love my dad but c'mon. then he said william." chris' reaction to the name didn't show much interest.

"that's nice but he just doesn't feel like a william, y'know?" you say to chris.

"i agree. matt suggested jonathan, which i didn't really like. mom still thinks he's actually a girl 'cause she says sometimes the scans can pick things up wrong." he says while looking at you, and you hum in acknowledgement.

"maybe she's right? sometimes they are wrong. it might be worth having a few girl options just incase, right?" he nods in agreement.

"what about... christina?"

"chris!"

"kidding, kidding. i like isabella." he says seriously.

"isabella... that's pretty. i like that one. that can be an option." he smiles in satisfaction that one of his suggestions has been received well. "i really like daisy, too." chris hums thoughtfully.

"me too." he says, pressing a kiss to your temple. "hey, if we do have a boy, what about theo?" a smile graces your face.

"i like theo, but can his full name be theodore so we can call him teddy?" you ask sweetly, and chris chuckles quietly.

"sure thing, babe. teddy sturniolo. he sounds like a fuckin' badass." his seriousness makes you giggle.

the two of you fall into that comfortable silence again, and chris runs his hand up and down your thigh gently.

"hey, i'm really happy i got you pregnant."

"that's an strangely romantic sentiment, where did that come from?" you ask teasingly, to which he shrugs.

"i don't know, it's just that, i never thought i'd have kids this young 'cause i'm immature as fuck, y'know? but you make me think i can be a really good dad." your heart practically melt at his answer, until he says "and obviously you look hot as fuck with my baby in you." and your smile drops, unamused. he doesn't even redact his words as you know that he means well, and as much as he's crass and crude, he is genuinely glad that the two of you are starting a little family. you reach up to press a swift kiss to his cheek as matt enters the room.

"did you guys decide on a name yet?" he asks, walking over to the two of you.

"yeah, i think we're gonna go with bernard." you say, deadly stone-faced, and you receive a death glare in response from matt, followed by a burst of laughter from your husband.

"tell me you're kidding." he says.

"of course, matthew, we are not calling our child bernard." he breathes what can only be called a sigh of relief.

"what did you pick then?"

"as of right now, we're pretty set on theodore." you tell him, running your hand over your stomach, and matt's eyebrows raise slightly in surprise.

"theodore, huh? never heard either of you mention that one before."

"yeah, we just thought of it." chris chimes in. "y/n says we can call him teddy, and i said we can call him theo, so there's plenty of nickname potential there."

"that's really cool, guys. i can't wait to meet my nephew. or niece, according to mom." matt says with a laugh. "hey, maybe it's twins and you guys just don't know yet. y'know how sometimes they can't see it on the scan? imagine if that happened to you guys. that would be insane."

matt's words make you freeze up a little. you hadn't even thought of that possibility, and while having twins would be fun, you're nervous enough for one, never mind two.

"i never even thought of that." you say with wide eyes, and matt can clearly sense the nervousness his words brought you.

"it's probably not twins, uh, they can almost always tell. you'll be fine!" he says quickly. feeling uncomfortable in the situation he created, matt awkwardly mutters out a 'sorry' and steps out of the room.

"and, babe, even if it is twins, we're gonna be amazing parents, yeah? and you're so strong so carrying those kids is gonna be light work for you, right?" chris says comfortingly. you nod, and relax again into chris' side.

you have to admit, the thought of having twins is exciting.

"yeah, it'll be fun." you say with a small smile. "we could get them little matching-but-not-matching outfits!"

"alright, sweetheart, don't get ahead of yourself, we don't even know if we're having twins yet." chris replies with a laugh.

"i know, i know. i'm just excited. and anyways, i've got another scan in a couple of weeks, so we'll know by then." he nods in response.

"imagine two mini versions of us running around." he says, secretly ecstatic at the thought of having twins.

"daisy and theo."

"fuckin' coolest duo in boston."

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this sucks ass :)

#sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #chris sturniolo x reader #chris x you #chris sturniolo x you #chris sturniolo fic #chris sturniolo imagine #chris sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo x pregnant!reader #sturniolos x reader #matt sturniolo x reader #nick sturniolo x reader #christopher owen sturniolo #matthew bernard sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo fic #chris x reader #chris sturniolo x fem!reader #chris x fem!reader #dad!chris sturniolo x reader #sturniolo fluff #sturniolo imagine #jayne writes #jaynes thoughts #jaynes asks #chris sturniolo fanfiction #sturniolo fanfiction #matt sturniolo fanfiction

[our-aroace-experience]

I don't think I can ever come out as aro-ace to my family. They have been always supportive of me and have been friendly and respectful towards most queer people. However, emphasis on most. If it's a label or identity they haven't heard that's not Lesbian or Gay they tend to be dismissive of it or think it's weird mental illness or woke brainwashing.

When I go home it feels like they are constantly bothering about getting boyfriend. They talk about who do I like or any interest in anyone, or even traits that I want in a boy. It makes me extremely uncomfortable and I try to dismiss it by saying that I'm focusing on school/ work.

But my mom tries to be supportive by saying it's ok to be happy by yourself but she doesn't want me to be alone and that sounds sweet until she adds- And if you like girls you can tell me!

She sometimes suspects I'm a lesbian because I have no interest in guys and asked my platonic female friend to the prom. I also wanted to wear a suit to the dance but not because lesbian but because I'm more comfortable in pants.

It's getting really annoying now when I go home and now am starting to hate it. Especially when extended family because they are extra pushy on me having boyfriends. I especially hate when they tell me advice on "when I get married".

"WHEN you get married.."

I really want to explain so I don't get boyfriend questions ever again but then I'm opening up another can of worms and then I'll get bunch of aro-ace questions instead and I don't want to get that ether.

Then I'll also have to deal with parents accusing me of making things up or being brainwashed by the left or something like that. Not to long ago my mom pointed out it was weird that I didn't have any feeling for my guy friends or see them as akin to brothers. She even mentioned that I should probably go to therapy if I see all guys as brothers? What?

It's gotten to the point where I just want a fake boyfriend to bring home for the holidays and then "break up with" so they'd leave me alone.

Then I talked about this with friends and they were like oh get a qpr! And I don't want a qpr or a long term relationship. I just want to live by myself and occasionally see friends. I want that Seinfeld Sitcom lifestyle where I live on my own but my friends are a door or two over.

I just want to be able to not get constantly questioned by family and live in peace.

yeah i get that, explaining to family can be difficult

#our aroace experience #aromantic #aro #asexual #ace #aroace #aroace asks #long post

[bunnakit]

my stand in ep 4 thoughts, feelings, etc

WOW WA WE WAA THAT SURE WAS AN EPISODE HUH - happy to report i went back through the episode slowly this week and took notes and really tried to gather everything i wanted to say (but i will inevitably forget something)

🌸 ok disclaimers because i have a lot of them for this particular episode 🌸

i'm just a silly guy on the internet, i'm not an expert in mental health, psychology, body language, whatever. most days i can't even take care of myself. i'm just saying things recreationally.

PLEASE do not put novel spoilers in my replies, reblogs, or tags without a warning notice. i've got an itchy blocking finger for it these days.

i am treating ming and joe and everyone involved in this show as if they were real life human beings. ming was not born some mustache twirling villain sent from hell to make joe miserable. joe is not some pure angel descended from the clouds to do no wrong. everyone in this show exhibits very human behavior and that can be distressing under certain circumstances. i'm just going to comment on them as humans. i'm not interested in a round table discussion on why a character is irredeemable, the scum of the earth, etc. i'm just putting my thoughts out there and you can take them or leave them.

🌸 alright yucky disclaimer time over 🌸

the episode really just picks us back up where everything left off - and yet joe still made ming breakfast, and ming isn't stupid (well right now at least,) he knows something is off.

i am confused why tong needs to get married on this specific day. and like bro how fast are you getting married? relax. the whole thing is just unstoppable force (trajectory of this producers career) meets immovable object (tong's fuckass stubbornness) and the collateral damage is massive.

and then there's the question of did joe ever want to play a lead? or did he let his impulsiveness and hurt put a target on his back? (only emphasized by the fact that everyone assumed joe would turn down the role)

i DO apologize for all my doubt surrounding wut. he, ja, and may are the only people in this show with any god damn sense. maybe jojo and yim. we'll see.

getting into the confrontation at joe's work, i really don't think it's that surprising when we keep in mind ming genuinely has no fucking clue what is going on. all he knows is joe woke up, was acting weird, didn't come home, and then told him to pack up his shit and leave with ZERO explanation. like, joe's completely in the right, but i'd also be confused as fuck. (i wouldn't go to someone's work about it but, y'know, we know ming acts in extremes.)

and to me this is where it really became obvious that joe has always been able to overpower ming, to get away from him, as we have seen joe's physical prowess, we've seen what he's capable of, but he never uses his body to move ming away from him - that's not who joe is, he's not someone that would put his hands on another person like that. it's just another way ming and joe are the direct antithesis of each other.

it's my thought that the argument escalates because ming is used to getting everything he wants - except for tong, and now joe. when joe begins to push him away and deny him his substitution for tong i think ming lashes out in his hurt with a thought of "it's happening again, why doesn't anyone want me?"

i will say while i do believe sol has good intentions for the most part his white knighting is getting a little irksome. while convenient, it just shows how much he's still hovering and laying in wait for a chance with joe - he, too, is not respecting joe's wishes. no is a complete sentence, sol.

and then things continue back at home and joe finally, finally throws ming's words back at him: if i'm so terrible to be with, if you're so great, why are you wasting your time with me?

and ming doesn't have an answer. what ming DOES have is another back embrace, arms wrapped around joe as he asks "don't you love me anymore?" but is he asking joe or tong?

"although i'm not as good as tong" even now joe's rampant self worth issues are still at play but at least he finally knows he's worth more than whatever this is.

then the phone rings and to me, ming looks skittish. he looks shaken. he's never seen joe so angry and he's scared and as the call progresses that fear morphs into rage when sol calls joe. and the thing is, regardless of who played the main role, ming was never going to be happy. it was either going to be joe or tong playing opposite sol and neither of those things would have been acceptable.

and then i said, out loud, in my quiet office: OH! and promptly lost my shit in the group chat.

ming doesn't look wholly present after his act of violence. his face is vacant, like he isn't completely seeing or grasping what he's just done. i get the impression that ming isn't mentally well; stress and fear and anger have a way of making people do really fucking stupid things and as these things happen you risk falling into the sunk cost fallacy - you've already gone this far, you can't stop now - which all aligns with the obsessive behavior we've seen from ming in the past.

as joe wakes up and they talk once again joe doesn't blame ming, he blames himself for not seeing the writing on the walls even though it was written in invisible ink.

"all these times we were together did you ever love me?"

"you can't tell?"

again, so much of the blame and emotional responsibility of their situationship is put on joe and ming refuses to communicate any of his feelings, perhaps because he doesn't know how to after repressing everything for so long.

WE DIDN'T GET HOT KINKY CHAINED UP SEX THOUGH, WHY DOES GOD HATE ME SPECIFICALLY

but the way joe looks at ming as they linger there in the wake of joe's request looks like a goodbye, the way his eyes soak in every detail of ming's face. despite all of this and the nightmare it has turned into he did love ming, perhaps still does, and he does have some of those good memories he was so desperate to keep.

though like.. joe.... maybe we could consider a different career path??? instead of just jumping to risking our lives? like sure food service sucks, cashiering sucks, etc. but you aren't in danger of falling off any cliffs, you know? and let's be real, he could just go into modeling with those looks.

it's my impression that when ming calls joe he looks haggard, like he's lost numerous nights of sleep (and we really don't know how much time has passed) but either way it does seem like he's at least done some amount of reflecting. his voice comes across soft, subdued, and sincere.

and after everything, back in the present, we see ming. he's still in the apartment, desperately calling joe's name all these years later, still unable to sleep and waiting for joe to come home just like he asked him to years ago.

maybe ming never wanted to enter the entertainment industry before, but he has now. perhaps it was never for the attention or the money, maybe he chose to promote those watches because it was a reminder of the gift from joe. and maybe this job, in this specific industry, is the closest he can feel to joe now. and maybe with new influence and connections ming can find out why he was never able to tell joe he loved him before he lost him.

WHO KNOWS, NOT ME, CAN'T WAIT TO FIND OUT THO

#bunn meta #my stand in #my stand in the series #usersasa #clairedaring #i can never find a good place to mention it but in like ep 1 ming knows how joe takes his coffee #after just like 1 day with him so like ming IS paying attention and DOES care for joe #as we see reinforced with his little gifts and the way he went shopping with him and stuff #the things ming does to show his love and care are very blink and you'll miss it #and it's hard for me to squeeze in my thoughts on that between everything else going on

[elliespectacular]

Eccentric Severe Murders raises an important question: who is the guy that’s the common denominator between all three Eccentric videos? Both the A&P tape and the Christie VHS don’t have a cast database from what I can tell, so who is this guy? If you know, how did you find out?

I found the grocery store training videos because I was seeking out that sort of thing in 2019, and stumbling onto Agatha Christie: The Scoop was a happy coincidence. You can find his name in the on-screen credits of the tape which is on YouTube for free. If I find something else from that era where he gives off a similar energy and there's enough to work with we might see another Eccentric Severe _____ but I'm not actively looking to make more.

Importantly, he's just a guy. A real person, an actor doing honest work. My interest in making funny edits of some old projects he's appeared in has equally much to do with his performance as it does with the material he was given.

I presume you're just curious and want to discover more of this actor's filmography. That's awesome and I encourage that! But I feel it needs to be said for anyone else wondering who the actor is - I do not want people to seek him out (or any other subjects of my YTPs) to contact him about my videos or to show him them. My videos are not meant to be a secret but they're also not his business. We're doing our own thing enjoying a fictionalized version of him, and it's vital that we maintain a healthy separation between the parody space and the real world.

In my experience some people love seeing themselves in YTPs, but some people really don't understand them. People in this second camp can feel anything from confusion to indifference to insult, and tend to get annoyed when YTP fans who think they're "kindly informing" their subjects are just reminding them of a thing they know of and don't care for. And they're valid for those reactions! It's a weird thing to have happen to you if you're not prepared for it.

I do maintain that YTPs are a form of speech, remix culture is worth protecting, and that it is my responsibility as a remix artist to demonstrate integrity and transparency in what I do - partly out of respect for the subjects. It's part of why these days I generally try to make YTPs of bigger YouTubers, corporately-produced media, and stuff where the people in them more-or-less know what they're getting into with regards to their face/name being public and their performance not fully belonging to them.

#ytp #dathings #youtube poop #ask #eccentric severe tumors

[otomiyaa]

Traveler's Training

Aether & Sethos

A/N: Today is also the bday of the lovely @eliankrios!!! Happy birthday Elian! This one is for you^^ I hope you have a wonderful wonderful day!

Summary: Aether and Sethos spend some quality time and end up training for, well yes, the next time Sethos will challenge Cyno. Aether knows just the way to beat him... (Also on AO3)

Word Count: 1.2K

"Wow, wow, wow!"

Aether smirked proudly. That was already the 3rd time he heard such amazed and excited cries. He watched Sethos run around, look around, explore, cheer, and come back to him with sparkling eyes.

"Amazing, huh?" Aether said.

It wasn't his intention to, well yeah, turn Sethos' attention away from Sumeru's rainforest only to brag about his beautiful Realm Within, but it kind of happened when Cyno and Tighnari left them alone for some business they had to attend to.

Introducing Sethos to the Serenitea Pot Realm was possibly the best way of entertaining him in the meantime. Without Tighnari and Cyno by his side, Aether wasn't too confident about guiding him around Sumeru after all.

"We entered that thing, and -?" Sethos admired the vast exteriors and looked around the realm inside the magical teapot.

"Yes. When I'm not out camping or staying at inns and spare rooms, this is my home," Aether said with a proud smile.

"It's amazing, woah!" Sethos ended up dropping himself in the grass, and he looked up at the sky.

"All this, in that small teapot," he sighed. Aether sat down next to him and smiled fondly.

"I'm glad you're enjoying yourself. And also that you and Cyno have been getting along well, lately!"

Sethos glanced at him and nodded slowly. "Me too. It's a breath of fresh air to hang around him, and Tighnari. I still hope to beat Cyno sometime, though."

"Hmm?" Aether cocked his head. Sethos blushed a little when he noticed him staring.

"What? He beat me in a duel, of course I wouldn't forget that, even though we became friends."

Aether smiled fondly. He had grown pretty close to Sethos in a short time. For him to be this honest with him, it was quite sweet.

"I know," Aether said.

Sethos frowned. "Know what?"

"I know a way to beat Cyno in a duel. In a different kind of duel I mean," he explained.

Sethos gave a sigh. "I hope you don't mean that card game. I tried it once and he just completely..." Sethos kicked with his foot into the air.

"Beat my ass."

Aether laughed, poor Sethos was so new to everything! How could Cyno be so merciless with Genius Invokation TCG! Give the guy a break.

"Hehehe, yes Cyno is indeed quite the die-hard card player. But no I didn't mean that. I meant..." Aether rolled over and reached out.

"This!" He tickled Sethos' side which was perfectly exposed since he was relaxing comfortably in the grass while resting his head in his arms.

"HUUUU!" Aether jolted as well at the funny sound that left him. Sethos jumped up like a cat that had its tail stepped on.

"What, what?" Sethos cried. "Why did you tickle me? It really tickled."

Aether snickered and covered his mouth. "Did you not ever have a tickle fight? It's like a duel, but with tickling."

Sethos sighed and shook his head. "I know about tickling, yes. I'm pretty ticklish. But to use it in combat? Hmmm."

The way he talked about it made Aether laugh even more.

"It's the kind of technique I think you could use to beat Cyno. He is... rather ticklish. Even I beat him once... no, twice," Aether said, remembering that second time which actually wasn't really a tickle fight. Just Tighnari holding Cyno down, and Aether having the time of his life teasing and tickling him. Good memories.

"Really?" Sethos sounded genuinely interested. Aether nodded

"Would you like to practice? I can give you a personal training. I tickle you, you try to tickle me back. After some practice, you'll have some good chances of beating Cyno if you use this technique."

Sethos nodded. "Alright then." But without giving him a heads-up, and without getting in position first, Aether already tickled him again, this time with two hands.

Flailing his arms and legs, Sethos let out a hysterical cackle and he threw his head back.

"Hohoho hahahang ohohon I wahahasn't reheheady! Wahaaaaah!" he cried out. Aether chuckled and wiggled his fingers rapidly all over his sides and tummy.

"Then I'd get ready if I were you! Cyno may be ticklish, but he's also quite fast and strong, so I think you'd want to follow this training well," Aether said, clawing at the ticklish guy's torso without mercy.

"Buhuhut! Wahahah! Noooo!" Sethos howled, and his hysterical movements allowed him to turn himself over onto his stomach. Not that it stopped Aether. Pinning him face-down in the grass, he climbed on top of him and attacked his ribs from behind.

"Eyaaaahaha!" Sethos squealed, trying to wriggle himself free. Aether started to wonder if Sethos could ever beat Cyno in a tickle fight. The poor guy really was too ticklish!

"Alright, alright. I'll give you a chance. Tickle me back!" Aether exclaimed and he jumped up and watched Sethos pick himself up on all fours.

Breathing heavily, he stood on his legs and reached out with his hands formed into claws, But Aether simply dodged, caught both his hands and pulled him forward, then threw him back down in the grass and resumed the tickle attack on him.

"You missed!" he sang.

"Waaaahahaha that wahahasn't fahahair!" Sethos cackled. Aether gave him two or three more chances like that. But one time Sethos only tickled him once before Aether easily turned the tables. The second time, Sethos was a little too hesistant, so Aether tickled him before he could even strike.

And the third time, heh. Sethos already started laughing before he even tried, seemingly anticipating Aether's counter attack.

"I wasn't doing anything yet," Aether said as he watched Sethos flinch and giggle.

"I know - but! Waahhh!" Aether tackled him down again and decided to tickle him until he begged for mercy, just to teach him how tickle fights like this could work.

"Do you surrender?" he asked, but Sethos shook his head and laughed hysterically.

"Nohohooo! I dohohon't!"

Laughing along with him, Aether tickled him some more, wiggling his fingers under his arms, against his sides, all over his tummy and even behind his knees, finding the sweetest tickle spots to make Sethos squeal and giggle.

Before Sethos surrendered, they were already interrupted by the arrival of Tighnari and Cyno.

"What is going on here?" Tighnari asked. Aether moved off Sethos, and the latter also got surprisingly well back on his feet with ease, his cheeks a little flushed and his hair messy.

"U-uh ah... I was getting some of the, eh, Traveler's training," he explained tiredly.

"Training?" Cyno asked. Aether signaled to Sethos not to say more; he still had a long way to go before he could beat Cyno successfully in a tickle fight.

"Y-yeah you know. We were just playing around. So, shall we go on or would you like to rest here first?" he asked Tighnari and Cyno. They smiled.

"It's nice here, let's stay for a bit longer," Cyno said.

"I agree," Tighnari said. "Do you have any tea at home?"

"I do," Aether said, and they followed them into his home. Meanwhile he patted Sethos on his back.

"We can practice again next time. Until then, let's keep this training a secret," he whispered. Sethos nodded.

"U-understood. I'll do better next time." Smiling, Aether thought he actually couldn't wait. He was having that much fun!

#genshin impact #sethos #aether #tickling #tickle fic #lee!sethos #otomiya!writes #cyno #tighnari

[mcflymemes]

THE IDEA OF YOU (2024) PROMPTS *  assorted dialogue from the film, adjust as necessary

i got swept up in the idea of you, and it's been really fun, it really has, but we both knew it had to end.

i know exactly where i'm gonna put it.

i'm not really into them anymore.

stop it. you're having a party. it's nonnegotiable.

if you ever get lonely, promise you'll text me, okay?

what is going on? are you guys in an alliance or something?

how are you? ready for some fun?

i just wanted to invite you over sometime.

i'm doing stuff this weekend you can't even imagine.

that means the world to me.

that makes me feel so much better about the fact that you fucking destroyed my life.

everything's paid for, all the hotels, the meals.

look after one another, and please check your texts.

this your first time?

which one is your favorite?

i mean, just look at him. he's such a hottie.

actually, do you know where the bathroom is?

i absolutely know who you are.

do you want a drink? i mean, i've got all the sodas, the healthy ones, the not-so-healthy ones. there's kombucha.

truth hurts, doesn't it?

it was truly transcendent.

you know, i don't think i ever got your name.

oh, we met earlier. in line for the bathroom.

slight change of plans. i met someone tonight.

i think you're not even a person until you hit thirty.

i just wanted to come over and say that i really admire you.

i don't know if you remember me, but we met at coachella.

this is a surprise.

whatever this is, i want it in my home.

they take their work very seriously, as do i.

are you gonna show me something else?

well, that was incredibly rude of me.

wow. you're a natural.

i find it honestly incredibly moving.

what do you feel when you look at it?

god, i'm starving. are you hungry? we should go get a bite to eat.

for what it's worth, i think we met in a very interesting way.

no, i'm not gonna let you smell-test the contents of my refrigerator.

we're two people with trust issues who need to open up a little.

i'm too old for you.

can i take you back to your hotel?

there's so many buttons.

i think that's my greatest fear in life, that i'm a joke.

i hope you don't mind that i borrowed your cardigan. it's only temporary. i will give it back.

i was really hoping you'd come with me.

what about what people will say?

i think we could have a lot of fun.

do you say every fucking thing that pops in your head?

you are very, very beautiful and i fell for your fuck-boy move.

i was trying to impress you.

i'm sorry, is it so shocking to you that i've slept with other women?

for the first time in... i don't even fucking know how long... i'm actually happy.

with you, laughing, just being with you, holding you at night, i mean... it's meant the world to me.

i don't think you ever even gave us a change.

so, what, you're... ashamed of me?

i'm going to go find somewhere else to sleep tonight.

i kept thinking "i'm just gonna have this experience and no one will ever know."

why would you break up with a talented, kind feminist?

maybe it doesn't have to end.

i didn't know my being happy would piss so many people off.

you're gonna have a big, beautiful life.

#rp meme #mcflymemes #rp memes #rp prompt #roleplay memes #roleplay prompt #rp starters #ask meme #ask memes #roleplay meme #roleplay inbox prompts #rp inbox meme #inbox prompt #inbox meme #sentence starter prompt #sentence starter #sentence starters #the idea of you

[zandlikething]

Perler bead qsmp eggs I made the same day they left

I haven't posted anything about it because I was still processing it. I thought Sense the eggs were coming back all the eggs would come back I was very sad to see them go but I understand why the admins left and respect their choice in leaving so please no one harass the admins

I have a message to the admins that played the eggs in the picture ( which I doubt they will see but I want to get it off my chest) so lots of rambling from this point on be warned.

Lullah: Lullah you were one of the first eggs I got really attached to and it was because of clips of you Chayanne and Philza that originally got me into the qsmp. Seeing how much you grew was so cool to see.

Seeing you go from a shy little egg who likes flowers and music to a bad ass egg who would do anything for her loved ones. An egg who survived so much and went through so much hurt but also a lot of joy.

Lullah you brought a lot of joy into people's life you certainly did mine and I can't wait to see what you do next.

Chayanne: Chayanne my first introduction to you was the clip of Max yelling at you cause you blew a hole on his property ( I know that was another admin this is for both) Chayanne you were always so chaotic and fun but so loving and protective of your siblings.

Your rivalry with Quackity was always so funny to see a grown man beffing with a pixel egg in Minecraft. You honestly remind me of my older brother which probably explains why I would relate to Lullah sometimes lol

I hope whatever you're doing you are doing great at it and I hope you know how much you did for this community

Pomme: Pomme I remember when you first arrived with the rest of the French I remember how sweet you were to everyone around you and how much fun you would have with all your parents. I would watch Bad pov a lot and the stream would always get brighter when you showed up.

Your connection to all the eggs were super sweet and all your lore was so interesting. Seeing you bond with Bad and Dapper was so cute and then Bad becoming your Dad and Dapper your brother was so cute. It was never "official" but it didn't need to be it didn't matter all that matter was you guys were family

I like all the Pomme times we got and one of my favorite streams was just following the eggs around mainly you and Dapper. It was so interesting and cool to see what you guys did and say without your parents around. I also found it cool we had something in common because I love RWBY too in fact if you scroll down my Tumblr you'll see some post I did on RWBY a few years ago.

Thank you Pomme I'm happy to see you and Dapper in Bads chat sometimes I can't wait to see what projects you'll work on next

Richardson: My boi the most bold egg lol your antics would always make me laugh. All the pranks you pulled on Bad and all the times you teased him to get a reaction were so funny. You were by far the most chaotic egg you would just pop up out of nowhere in anyone's stream it would always get more chaotic even if just a little.

Honestly your goodbye and final words made me cry yup you not Chayanne and Lullah and Philza saying goodnight you who just walked into the sunset was the greatest thing ever. The memorial you made for you Dapper and Pomme was so good I love it and I want you to know that I learned a lot about Brazil because of you and your parents I want to go to Brazil one day now somewhere I've never thought about going.

Goodbye you little rascal I hope whatever you're doing your doing it with chaos

Dapper: Dapper you are my favorite I immediately was drawn to you and your top hat. I first saw you in a Philza stream protecting Lullah from Quackity and I started watching Bad ever since.

I remember when Quackity kidnapped you in a desert temple and how scared I and the rest of the chat was. Little did we know how common that would become lol how many times did you get kidnapped like 7.

You and Bad's lore was my favorite I loved your guys father and son connection. It was clear to see how much Bad cared about you and how you cared for him back. You guys made such a good team with all the stuff you made with the create mod.

I relate to you the most for a few reasons one being all the animals you had and collected. I am a big animal person so if I could actually have cool mythical and cool animals I would but also one of my favorite signs from you is "he can't handle the uber powers of my uber autism" This made me laugh so much I am on the spectrum so when I saw this clip I was Ohhhh that's probably why I relate to this Minecraft egg so much lol

Dapper thank you for really getting me into the qsmp there were some ruff patches and a little drama but through it all I had a good time

Thank you for introducing me to Badboyhalo I now have found one of my new favorite streamers

Thank you all of qsmp for helping me and many others through our days and for an amazing year I will still watch qsmp as long as Bad streams it but I have a feeling it's going to be time to say goodbye soon. So thank you qsmp I am sad not to have these streams in this next chapter of my life but I am happy for when you were you helped me get through.

But you know what they say everyone:

"Don't cry because it's over,smile because it" happened

#qsmp #quackity smp #qsmp eggs #qsmp badboyhalo #qsmp rambles #qsmp tallulah #qsmp dapper #qsmp philza #qsmp chayanne #qsmp lullah #qsmp pomme #qsmp richarlyson #perler beads #perler art

[silusvesuius]

unleashing the same hellscape i did on my notes app here it's my nelvas thinking dump i wrote just for fun and to keep track of what i view them as up 2 this point. Might change my mind on it later on it has a lot of things written in brackets for no reason . it's like ~2500 words long which isn't much but i think i said everything i've had in my mind for now read it for fun if you like to have fun leik me :) And talvas :) And nelothxP

retyping what i said in the tags of those last text posts and rearranging those thoughts a bit: in my train of thought that's been going steady since early 2024 i'm almost certain that neloth might see talvas as the epitome of being morally Clean (before that changes because of neloth's influence over him) and generally pure as a person. pure not used in the Pervert way; neloth is just a veeery big fan of talvas having absolutely no backbone and being very docile when it comes to him. which is r expected traits 4 someone if they find themselves under neloth's thumb as an apprentice, but it being written that he isn't at all catty and defiant to his face is cute. all talvas manages to do is shit talk neloth to others and pray neloth doesn't find out he meant the things he said but also can’t help feeling bad about it, even though neloth doesn't and wouldn't care, if he found out. neloth is happy with being an obnoxious & disgusting person. truly.. him growing obsessed with talvas' docile and innocent nature doesn't necessarily have to add up to him wanting to Taint or Ruin him (and if it happens ((it does)) it's not done on purpose, neloth can't hold that much control and power of his actions in that specific department). he encounters difficulties when he realizes he actually wants that Elven Twink.. it's too far gone to fix anything after he's tampered with talvas' patience and stability, and even then he can't be honest with talvas about anything, because he still wants to hold a great deal of power over him (neloth essentials for survival).

Might be the type to just want talvas to magically(haha) think it's okay that his wizard master desires him and expect that energy right back without talvas actually acknowledging it because it'd make neloth feel insanely cringy and embarrassed.. humiliated.. EVEN. but that's just in a deep deep dark corner of his mind, he isn't stupid. when trying to gain 'access' to his apprentice ("*His* apprentice" is also kinda funny way of viewing his mind too. just cause talvas is working as an apprentice under him neloth probably already feels a concerning sense of ownership over him that makes him feel very good) he can't even make the signs of interest be apparent to talvas because he's insanely inept at being Soft and honest for obvious reasons. he can tell what possibly could make talvas warm up to him even after he treats him like shit for eons but there's no way he's bringing himself to do it (change is embarrassing, especially in their formal dynamic, and especially at his age). so it's a half-assed attempt (actually he's trying his hardest🙄) to try and make talvas be (at least) less afraid of him. not that talvas has any other place that we know of that he "Belongs" to, he just sticks with neloth regardless of anything. neloth watching him as he sleeps ensues . Guys what do i do to make my apprentice let me hit because all of the eye contact i do with him while gripping his arm or petting his knee isn't helping. 

if we were to go back to how that spark is ignited in neloth swamp of a heart, brain… idk, it has to be when he realizes talvas' capability of forgiveness and 'Sucking it up' instead of lashing out at neloth after .. anything, but perhaps physical abuse in particular. neloth a 100% has absolutely no problem putting his hands on anyone, especially someone he sees so often, such as talvas. not that talvas really annoys him (his clear and voiced obedience pleases neloth as anyone can tell), but he just doesn't see it as too much of a big deal. the physical mistreatment that happens once in a blue moon isn't intense enough to scare off talvas for sure anyways. neloth is a bitch so all he can so is smack him at the back of the head (talvas finds it very normal) and slap him if he's feeling festive (something talvas finds kinda extreme but not that it happens often. he sometimes feels like he deserves it, or that neloth is warranted to do as he pleases. he tosses around it being justified or pitying himself, though). May be possible that neloth would realize he Like Likes talvas once he slaps him, mayhaps, for the first time, but talvas' immediate reaction to being treated like that is just sadness mixed with feeling shame for tearing up/crying in front of someone he respects *bishoujo sparkles sfx*. talvas is a delicate soul so he can't hold warranted emotions like that for long, and even tho it's expected of him to be making eye contact w/ neloth in a setting like that, he wouldn't be able 2 bring himself to do it because looking at neloth would make him wanna burst out in tears like a weeeee baby. Booo hooo.. talvas is the 19th century (4th era) damsel that runs out of the ball in tears after no young cavalier invited her to dance. watch this bleed into the most awkward and silent week of neloth's entire life because talvas doesn't even really feel like speaking to him or looking at him, but neloth doesn't wanna brute force the usual respectful etiquette out of him cus he thinks that's just gonna make talvas hurl himself down on some rough rocks at the seashore. Good thing talvas is very spineless and forgiving (especially in relation to neloth… i mean.. who r YOU to not forgive him) so that might just last a day or two. the hurt always stays tho. neloth this is why talvas doesn't wanna smash you.. you might've made some conclusions about what elven twink you like but talvas is just even more scared of you now. was your Pervert awakening worth it. and even if we do backflips and jump thru the point where everything is too far gone for either of them to go back, dude is still too afraid to make out with his apprentice. Deserve. but why though because talvas wouldn't refuse. for what reason? we may never know

^^^ this makes me feel like i love seeing characters i reaaaalllly love (elenwen and talvas in this case) as enigmas in situations where they're confronted with something so ""Intimate"". elenwen's stance on this is final tho cause she's a grown ass woman and there's no way you could reshape her brain. ulfric left her mind plane in SHAMBLES. talvas has more right (in the literal sense) to be erratic or inconsistent with his actions. maybe he likes to be desired. Also i strongly believe that talvas has probably never been in love (for any reason rly but it's mostly him not having actual time for it + not seeing it as something that is important to him at that point in his life)… i want neloth to be his first experience with Love so that it ruin his view on it forever. can't get myself to say he'd be in love with neloth at any point though. From his standpoint it really should feel empowering and 'nice' that neloth wants him in many ways (ew).. cause that's a man with status.. power.. ability to do anything rly . talvas is in no condition to be playing mind games with him or anything tho so don't get that idea. he's not strong enough of a person to be Tricking anyone or to be Playing with anyone's feelings. neloth would be immune to that, too. neloth can just kinda tell talvas is too good and … UNTAINTED. talvas wants to see the best in everyone. too bad he genuinely detests you, neloth.. so: he doesn't actually love neloth but wouldn't be happy to see his tombstone either. SO (PART TWO): if you time it right he wouldn't be against getting Freakkkkyyyy with you okay?but no promises

even if @ some point talvas develops indistinct feelings towards neloth cause of neloth's own incessant weird-mild advances it wouldn't have to mean he just likes old men permanently now. actually it kinda does. i can sorta feel it rearranging his braincells and making him unable to normally interact with people in his age range. he probably already had a hard time talking to others in hopes of developing a friendship just cause he's timid but after neloth's nonstop abuse and Accidental romance mind games he morphs into a whole new type of guy. it's hard to notice at first but he'd probably just start to leech off of neloth's prissy and unbearable personality in a natural course of things + neloth is the only person he sees and talks to on the regular pretty much. < this can just be reworded as just the cycle of abuse and whatnot. if he notices an opening in the abilities and Smarts of another person, especially someone his age/younger, he will automatically see them as umm…stupid. and also insult your abilities to your face if he snaps. he strikes me as the type to be afraid to say what he really thinks (another consequence of being glued to neloth all the time when all talvas does is act like he totally respects anything he says) and gets scared if anything slips out his mouth but is proud in letting the "Truth" be known because he already figured out you're a lesser being than him. he's just cloning neloth's verbal abuse braincells though he would never put his hands on someone. his desire to be mean and see himself as superior stems from neloth always disparaging him obviously.. talvas 4 that reason is very self conscious of his abilities and doesn't rly think he's all that useful or talented. his self doubt then would play into how he doesn't know when to believe what others are saying to and about him.. i wanna imagine that talvas is very oblivious to neloth's weirdo status just cause he partly doesn't even want that thought to cross his mind. i bet everyone but him sees it and finds it gross😕 but nobody in the vicinity is strong enough to tell neloth that he should be ashamed LMFAO. if you would try and even hint to talvas that it's happening he'd never take you seriously and just get mad. he's protective of neloth's image more than neloth himself is; not that people knowing neloth has abnormal sodomistic inclinations toward his apprentice would make his public image worse than it already is (everyone already thinks he's weird so it's not shocking at all) but talvas still wouldn't wanna hear it cause he thinks it's just false. maybe he's just ashamed that he's being brought into the whole thing. also because he doesn't wanna face the reality EJI23JRIO32KJ Well talvas when neloth makes an actual move on you don't say that we didn't warn you.. we're all waiting till neloth's status as an obvious apprentice-pervert becomes obvious to you

even if he's willingly ignorant of the fact he still thinks of the 'accusations' a lot when he feels like it. and unknowingly begins feeling even more uncomfortable in neloth's presence. heart starts beating faster and everything. neloth could come up to him meters away and talvas would still cover his mouth in realization and be like "i knew it… the DB told me but i didn't wanna believe it …..😦 so you really do like young men … and you're in love with me ..😨" *Neloth wakes up from this fever dream drenched in sweat* < neloth doesn't want (obvi) talvas to react that way at any point because he himself would just get scared so they'd just be staring at each other wide eyed. but talvas jumping into his advances isn't what he wants either (that'll also scare him). neloth is still relying on talvas' politeness to let him do as he pleases. but it is impossible for talvas to let it slide without questioning anything regardless so🤷‍♀️ take your few Ls and move on. neloth just wants talvas to sit on his lap. wants to spoonfeed him soup. he's so romantic. he also wants to(sniper on rooftop blows my head to bits). neloth is actually a pretty touchy feely person when he's feeling Frisky (=deranged about talvas). I'm certain his favorite part of talvas' body is his legs. talvas has beautiful young man skipping leg day legs. so nothing special at all but neloth wants to touch them lol.. let your master wizard squeeze your calves and he might just be occupied enough like a kid playing with a fidget toy to not abuse you verbally for 3 seconds. as i said befoar neloth is unpleasant with his touch because he doesn't know how to be soft + doesn't even want it to necessarily feel very 'rewarding' as to not pamper talvas. petting talvas kinda turns into a nervous habit for himself and an instrument of some sort of Reassurance 4 talvas when he wants him to know he’s not mad, for example. non-vebal confirmation. talvas still finds it weird but thinks it’s a charm point too. neloth wouldn't even be against touching him familiarly in front of others but only in a "older male figure" ways ex. touching his knee or putting his hand at the back of his neck (talvas sees it as some sort of disciplinary tactic though). physical touch that matches neloth's age and is enough for it to be seen as not necessarily romantic / overtly weird. 

there'ssssss no saving talvas after such a powerful person gets his hands on him. any will to leave would leave HIM either out of fear or out of attachment and neloth wouldn't just let him go (Alive at least) since he knows the things he knows. if talvas were to escape i'm a Truther of him not feeling in place and wanting to go back cause it's the stability that he's used to. but tbh if he encounters neloth on accident anywhere he's gonna start running. I was drinking tea while writing this and started choking on it i just nearly died writing this are youhappy. anyways, nelvas is a never-ending abusive relationship that doesn’t even have High highs, all it has is low lows. neloth always mistreats talvas for any reason but is never genuinely kind from the heart or out of remorse. .. hmm……yeah. I forgot to type this back out from my posts tags > talvas might just start viewing neloth as fuck crazy and demented after he Finally notices at least one molecular sign of gay attention from him . like ‘Oh wow Master Neloth obviously doesn’t get any female attention or anything cus he’s a sick fuck why does he have to search for it from me Can varona take the hit for me 🥺 *sees her dead body being dragged by the DB* hmm i guess not well i’ll figure something out i guess’ (he doesn’t) also the dialogue talvas has with varona after he steals neloth’s book trying to conjure some bs up will always be so cute to me he’s so defensive and afraid of neloth finding out. Him trying to decipher neloth’s handwriting is cute TOO ik their 19th century love letters to each other would go crazy and make sense to anyone but each other but i’m not gonna talk about 19th century girl talvas x neloth rn it’s too much . what ever. i think i’m done thank you i should just go back to drawing them as grecian pottery red figures or smthj Fun stats for you 4 getting to the end: times the word ‘abuse’ is used: 6

#text #i've been putting more meaning(?) into the nelvas-es i've been drawing lately so i wanted to see how it would reflect in words #the fact that dis will show up in tags will haunt me a little bit but if i add asteriks it will be incomprehensible LOL #i hope this isn't too hard to understand when reading bc i know i have an easier time reading stuff like this instead of 'snobby' writing - #- bc i like knowing how the thoughts were brewing as they were written down. #but it may not be the case for all people. #what do U think of it. #i think what i;ve always liked the most in being able to talk w/ people Online is getting to know their thoughts on the same thing #more than anything else #i literally sucked and spit out all of the skajrim lore factors out of their relationship pretty much (not that it had much in the first - #- place) so it's just a reading on a possible scenario with the characters i was given #i mean characters i put in the soup pot decorating the middle of my brain #this is december-may 2024 facts for now #just so i remember #abuse // #< OKAY #log #< is gonna be my tag for this type of thing if i end up saying more because i already started torturing my notes app with what i think of - #- civil war characters #tumblr is pussy so it made me reformat the paragraph breaks i made. they don't rly matter anyway but still

[coeluvr]

So I just read the demo for the first time and… are you okay? Like do you need to talk to someone? Cuz holy shit, that was depressing. Don’t get me wrong, it was great, but I am just mentally, emotionally, and physically drained now (don’t ask me about that last part). All in all, I really enjoyed it, but I do have some thoughts.

Firstly, I don’t understand how anyone from Rosea (except for Hunter, Fadiya and her mom, and maybe Helios) has any fans. Like did they just forget that everyone else (including Lancelot) contributed to the total destruction of our family? Everyone’s over here shipping Lancelot and Luceris, and to be fair, if this was a different story I would too, but like… they’re the enemy? Speaking of Luceris…

Dude is on some shit. Like I get it’s the point, but everything about our relationship with him just feels weird and wrong, and I’m counting the days til we can kill him. Until then, I guess I’ll have to make do with disrespecting the memory of his dead wife at every opportunity. Also side note, but as a Straight Male tm it does feel a little weird having to fake a romance with another guy, especially a guy that’s like fifty years older than me lol (Luceris really isn’t beating the Catholic Priest allegations)

The rest of the cast are a lot of fun, and I’m glad they all at least have sympathy towards MC. I think Hunter is the coolest character ever and I want to be them, and Fadiya can do no wrong in my eyes. Vincent sucks, but I haven’t really spent much time with him so maybe that’ll change. Helios I feel sorry for. He’s a nice guy and I do like him a lot, but he’s unfortunately collateral damage in my crusade against Father Luceris. I hate that we have to hurt him to get revenge, but it feels very realistic and gives your decisions a lot more weight.

On the flip side, Soarine is perfect and has never done anything wrong in her life ever. If Soarine has a million fans, then I am one of them. If Soarine has ten fans, then I am one of them. If Soarine has only one fan then that is me. If Soarine has no fans, then that means I am no longer on earth. If the world is against Soarine, then I am against the world.

All in all, I love what you’re doing with this game, even if I do have to take a twenty minute break after each playthrough just to decompress lol. I can’t wait to see where this goes and am gonna stare at a wall until the next update drops. Thanks for making such an interesting story and give Soarine my love 💚

Lol hi, anon!

First of all, I'm fine 😭 I'm like that one happy guy that writes horror whose name I keep forgetting but I bet someone knows who I mean.

Regarding the characters from Rosea that are not all that great having fans, I don't know why that's unexpected to you if I am being honest lmao. In every fandom I've ever been in, there have always been people that like the antagonists. I am one of the people that ship Lancelot and Luceris but I feel like that's to be expected since I literally created them. 💀 The day I write in all of the side couples you'll combust. /j

But also you don't have to fake a "romance" with Luceris? 😥💀 I can only think of the husband comments MC can make and those are entirely optional so...

I'm glad you like the other characters! Soarine is indeed everything. 🙇‍♀️

Thank you for your kind words! 💗

#coe answers

[mrsarcherofinfamy]

●MJF x Reader●

Summary: Max freaks out thinking you want Lance instead of him. He finds out the hard way that Lance is actually your dad.

_________________________________________

*Y/N's POV*

Standing in the hallway fixing my Murderhawk Monster shirt, I am watching my dad make his return to Rampage against a random squash wrestler. I am smiling really big watching him. Someone comes up and stands next to me. I look over seeing Max standing next to me.

"Hey Max. What's up?"

"Whatcha doing out here in the hallway?"

"Oh I'm watching this match. It's his return and I'm so happy for him!"

He looks down at my shirt than back at me.

"Oh I see what's going on here. You have moved on from me and now are interested in that loser."

I look at him with a shocked face.

"Excuse me?"

"Yeah you heard me right. You wanna date this loser over me. Who is a champion. But no, Y/N wants to date the bottom tier and not the top tier. Have fun with that loser. Bye."

I stand there with my eyes wide watching him walk away.

"Did that really just happen?"

Bowens and Caster walk up next to me looking at me. Caster puts his hand on my shoulder as I look up at them.

"Does he not know that is your dad?"

"He didn't even let me explain. He just freaked out."

"Well now that he is available, I might have to slide in those dms."

"You go for it Caster."

I laugh looking at him and he shakes his head looking at the tv. I look back at the TV seeing my dad pick up the win.

"I'll see you guys later!"

I head off to gorilla as they say their goodbyes.

_________________________________________

*Max's POV*

I watch as Y/N jumps into Lance's arms and he spins her around hugging her tightly. To say I am jealous is an understatement. I walk into gorilla not looking at them getting prepared for my promo I am going to do in the ring. Lance sets Y/N down and they both look over at me. Y/N shakes her head and walks out of gorilla. Lance looks at me confused but walks out with her anyways. My music hits and I go out to the ring.

_________________________________________

*Max's POV*

I am sitting on my bed in my shared hotel room with Adam Cole when he looks over at me from his bed.

"Dude, is something wrong?"

"It's nothing."

"Cmon Max. You have been upset since we got back to the hotel. What's going on?"

"It's Y/N okay? She isn't interested in me anymore. She's moved on to that loser Lance Archer."

He starts laughing and I look over at him confused.

"What's so funny?"

"You! Thinking Y/N isn't interested in you and she wants Lance. That's the funniest thing I've heard this week."

"What do you mean? I saw her wearing his shirt, saying she was so happy for him, jumping into his arms and hugging him tightly. Like she obviously doesn't want me."

He starts laughing harder and I look at him getting pissed off.

"What is so funny about this?"

"Dude, did you let her explain why she had the shirt on and she was happy for him?"

"No. I just freaked out because I have hardcore feelings for her and she hurt me going to that loser."

"Max..... that's her dad."

I look at him with a blank face.

"What?"

"Yeah. Lance is her dad."

"Oh shit."

I grab my phone and call her.

_________________________________________

*Y/N's POV*

Sitting on my bed in my shared hotel room watching tv, my phone starts buzzing. I pick it up and see Max calling me. I hit the ignore button and put it down.

"Who was that?"

I look over at Max Caster laying on his bed and shake my head.

"It was Max."

"If he calls again, can I answer?"

"Sure! I'll put it on speaker."

We go back to watching the TV when my phone starts buzzing again. I look over at Caster, smiling hitting the accept button putting it on speaker.

"Y/N! Y/N! Are you there?"

"Hey Max! Whats going on?"

"Who is this?"

"It's Caster!"

"Oh God no. Please. Where is Y/N?"

"In the shower. Why are you calling her?"

"I wanted to apologize for how I acted earlier today. I didn't know that Lance is her dad. I feel like a total idiot Caster. I'm so in love with that woman that I got jealous and pissed off and upset and confused and....."

"Max?"

"Y/N?"

"I can hear everything you are saying. I've had you on speaker this whole time."

"Oh...."

"You really are in love with me?"

"You have no idea. I feel like such an idiot for everything I said. I should have let you explain but my feelings got the best of me."

I get up, wave at Caster than leave my hotel room hanging up on Max. I walk up to Max's hotel room door and knock on the door.

The door opens and Adam is standing there smiling at me. He opens it letting me in when I see Max sitting on the edge of his bed with his head down.

"Who was that Adam?"

Adam looks at me than back at Max who still is looking at the floor.

"Why don't you look dude?"

Max looks over seeing me, gets up and runs over engulfing me into a hug. I wrap my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist.

"Y/N! I'm so sorry! I love you so much!"

I look at him putting my hands on his cheeks smiling.

"I love you so much too Max!"

Adam starts clapping behind us and I look back at him.

"Finally you two are together!"

I giggle laying my head on Max's shoulder looking up at him and he looks at me.

"Finally got my dream girl."

#wrestling imagine #writing #imagines #aew imagine #aew fluff #aew imagines #aew fanfic #mjf aew #aew wrestling #aew fanfiction #aew fic #aew #all elite wrestling #mjf fanfic #mjf imagine #mjf fanfiction #mjf fic #mjf imagines #mjf #maxwell jacob friedman #charley's fics

[vounnasi]

better a month late than never

#six fanarts #ghostface #scream 1996 #howl pendragon #howl's moving castle #rose quartz #steven universe #bibi reden #i love amy #mitsuki koga #the guy she was interested in wasn't a guy at all #krobus #stardew valley #fanart #my art #.eureka #i'm not satisfied with all of these but i am happy to be drawing again - that's what really matters :) #thank you to everyone who requested characters or gave prompts!

[lgbtlunaverse]

I don't think we talk about xiyao exes to lovers enough. I understand that in canon the "breakup" ended with death and imo it was never going to end any other way (I have a lot of feelings about how jgy is doomed from the start) but even in aus where survival is an option I barely ever see their full potential realized. The fact that there is this heartbreaking gap that is between them now, and yet that, despite it all, they can't stop loving each other. When you have drama this good, why is the conflict relegated to outside threats and we end up with little to no exploration of internal strife, of the fact that these guys have been living a domestic lie for a decade (I cannot stress this enough, the amount of parralels between xiyao and jgy's marriage to qin su are staggering.)

And let me be clear I will NEVER begrudge anyone their hurt/comfort and wanting their faves who are denied happiness and peace at every turn to find it. god knows I need that sometimes. Or even the less healthy but so emotionally devastating fics where the caring isn't good, and it doesn't fix anything- might only make things worse, actually- and xichen ends up recreating his father's fate. I love all of those things. But. Man. This divorce was over 11 years in the making it should take AT LEAST that long to resolve. What do you do when the person you trusted the most lied to you for years? What do you do when the only person who's ever believed in you loses that faith so completely they'd hurt you over a lie without hesitation? I need me some xiyao who try to get over each other for 20 years and fail. I need them to meet after not seeing each other for years and have it hurt like no time has passed at all. I need arguments where no one raises their voice but that feel like a screaming match anyway. Do you see my vision?? Do you see what we could have?

(if fics that do exacly this are out there, recs are of course welcome)

#mdzs #meng yao #xiyao #lan xichen #jin guangyao #rs: i wish it could've been you #this might make some people really mad #at the idea that jgy has any right to have grievances with xichen but uh... #i'm not interested in arguing with jgy antis. go scream at a wall #or a different camp who DO like xiyao but who are like 'but xichen was lied to jgy wouldn't blame him' #the fact that it was a lie makes it WORSE you guys know that right? #some of you have never been the proverbial boy who cried wolf #and had people assume everything you say is a lie because you've lied in the past #and good for you! You SHOULD be honest with those you love i'm very happy for all of you #but also. lmao. you have no idea how that feels. #i have read aus where they break up and get back together of course #but i always end up feeling like people see the conflict as an obstacle? a thing to get past so we can get them back together #and not.. you know. the most interesting part. the selling point #I think in a slightly lower stakes au xiyao should wait a few years get back together because they love each other and then break up AGAIN #when they realize that the old relationship they had with that easy trust is gone forever. love isn't enough to bring that back #you can build something new. including a new kind of trust just as potent. but that old easy kind is gone. #and i think they should try to get it back because it was the best thing they ever had #and get fucked up about it when they realize they can't #and it should take them well over a decade to mourn it until they're ready to let it go and try to make something new of it #PLEASE let me talk about the xichen qin su parralels please let me talk about how rusong is nmj-coded #not in personality but in the function he has narratively as someone that can never stop haunting jgy. #the fact that nmj's death and rusong's birth were likely extremely close to each other timeline wise LET'S TALK ABOUT IT

[red-moon-at-night]

Let's talk a little bit about Mahiru's boyfriend

This post is alternatively titled "Mahiru's Boyfriend Probably Had An Eating Disorder And I Am Very Sad About It So Now You Get To Be Sad About It With Me" but that felt a bit much in the bold title font so I'm trying to tone this down at least a little bit :')

So I was reading this wonderful post earlier (you should too btw it has a LOT of interesting information), and as I was going through the food section something clicked in my brain. Pieces of information that were drifting aimlessly before quickly came together for me and I almost wish they hadn’t because oh boy is it depressing.

Now, nothing I’m about to say here is explicitly stated - but I do think it is strongly insinuated, through the MVs of both ‘This Is How To Be In Love With You’ (TIHTBILWY what an acronym wow) and ‘I Love You’. I am aware that the latter video has a lot of metaphorical imagery, but I still think some of this imagery can be taken in a literal sense to reinforce ideas established in TIHTBILWY.

TW/Trigger Warnings: discussion of eating disorders (anorexia, bulimia, etc.), discussion of suicide and suicidal thoughts. Please take these into consideration and stay safe!

credit to iaobug’s transcribed images from ‘This Is How To Be In Love With You’ used below btw!

Now I’ve always had an inkling this could be possible, but I didn’t realise until recently there was this much evidence supporting a little idea of mine dancing around in my head.

But First, Some Quick Definitions and Criteria

First things first, I think we should briefly clarify what an eating disorder is and what eating disorder I think Mahiru’s boyfriend most likely had.

Here are some definitions:

Eating disorders are behavioral conditions characterized by severe and persistent disturbance in eating behaviors and associated distressing thoughts and emotions. They can be very serious conditions affecting physical, psychological and social function. (source)

An eating disorder is a mental health condition where you use the control of food to cope with feelings and other situations. (source)

And here are some brief introductions to several types of eating disorders:

The most common eating disorders are:

anorexia nervosa – trying to control your weight by not eating enough food, exercising too much, or doing both bulimia – losing control over how much you eat and then taking drastic action to not put on weight binge eating disorder (BED) – eating large portions of food until you feel uncomfortably full

Other specified feeding or eating disorder (OSFED) – A person may have an OSFED if their symptoms do not exactly fit the expected symptoms for any specific eating disorders.

(source)

Okay, so we have some basic information down, cool! This is not fully comprehensive but it will do for the purposes of this segment.

So what eating disorder do I believe Mahiru’s boyfriend had? 

I’m not sure! The information we have is not conclusive enough for me to confidently pick an option. What I will say is most likely, and most common, is OSFED and the concept of the eating disorder cycle. People’s symptoms will often overlap with multiple diagnoses, or shift from one mode of behaviour (e.g. the restrictive eating behaviours found in anorexia) to another (e.g. binge eating and following compensatory behaviours found in bulimia).

Things are often not as clear-cut or black and white as we’d like to imagine.

Let’s move onto looking at the MVs, shall we?

This first music video has a wealth of information hidden in its cute magazine-style annotations and imagery - information that, when you look a little closer and consider the bigger picture, raises all the alarm bells in my mind.

Parts of ‘This Is How To Be In Love With You’ That Make Me Pause In Concern, In Chronological Order:

The Bread

Let's start off with a not very obvious one.

One of the first things we learn about Mahiru’s soon-to-be-boyfriend (which by the way this is literally the 2nd time he’s mentioned) is ‘wow he buys a lot of bread’. Insignificant on its own, I know, but consider this through my lens if you will: my man has bought 5 whole baguettes from a bakery. Not 2 or 3, but 5. Actually, on closer inspection there's even more bread of a different type at the bottom of that bag too. These aren’t store-bought, they’re fresh and will probably go stale in a few days. Pray tell, if the man is not eating baguette for breakfast lunch and dinner over the course of 72 hours... why did he buy so much fucking bread?

What comes to mind when I see this is binge eating. Bread is one of the most common binge foods out there; anything with high carbohydrates or high fat content, in fact, often due to its “unhealthy” or “forbidden” nature.

We'll just have a quick look at Mahiru's comment again:

"I thought to buy the same bread he did, but this is far too much for me to eat... ><

I forgot to ask how many calories there are..."

If it hasn't been established by now with the MV's aesthetic, Mahiru cares about her appearance. A lot. Her self-image and beauty directly ties into looking 'good' enough for others, so she can find the love of her life and please him with her looks.

If Mahiru is also calorie counting, this does not bode well for their relationship. I should probably speak in past tense, actually... Mahiru's own self-image behaviours made her blind to her boyfriend's self-image behaviours. There we go.

But I'm getting ahead of myself here.

So, We have an indication of binge eating behaviours. Remind me again what comes after binging?

The Jogging Hobby

Oh, that’s right - purging.

Excessive exercise is an indirect method of purging/compensatory behaviour found in bulimia. A more commonly known purging method is self-induced vomiting, but that's certainly not the only way to counteract excess calories. 

So the jogging, while harmless in isolation, is starting to paint an ever-so-slightly worrying picture.

Again, let's take a look at Mahiru's comment:

"I had a chance to chat with him today, and he mentioned his hobby was jogging. ... I haven't exercised this much in ages... I'm totally exhausted..." 

The only hobby (not hobbies but hobby, singular) that we learn the boyfriend has is this. Sure, there's one movie that he also likes... but that's it. There's not much else to him! So when the two most prevalent ideas attached to this guy are 'food' (in excess) and 'exercise' (in excess)... you can see where I'm going with this.

And by the way, the post I linked at the very beginning? Well, they worked out the location of where this running loop is, and judging by Mahiru’s position and direction it would suggest she’s already jogged about 5km and beginning another loop. So we’re looking at a jog ranging from 5-10km (or more)...

The Alcohol

Okay, here's a quick pop quiz question for you. Who is more likely to get drunk on the same volume of alcohol: a 5"1 woman, or an average height (5"7 in Japan) man?

In theory, it should be the 5"7 man on the basis of his height and size. Alcohol tolerance goes up the bigger you are. 

So why is it that the boyfriend ended up blackout drunk, and Mahiru... didn't?

Let’s take a look at the comment:

“My first date at a bar, how heartpounding!

Here is where I learned he’s the biggest lightweight I’ve ever met! ...or maybe I’m just really good at holding alcohol?

Whatever the case, blackout drunk him is so cute!”

Three possible options:

Mahiru really can 'hold her liquor'. Judging by her sheltered home life and general lack of adult life experience though, I'm gonna press x to doubt here sorry mappi.

The boyfriend drunk more alcohol than Mahiru. Also unlikely, as she calls him a 'lightweight' and I think she would've highlighted this in her comment.

He drank on an empty stomach. Alcohol absorbs way faster if you haven't had anything to eat beforehand. This, I think is the most likely scenario.

Here's a little more on the subject that I found interesting:

You absorb 20 per cent of alcohol into your bloodstream through your stomach and the rest into your bloodstream through your small intestine.

Drinking a small amount of alcohol stimulates your appetite because it increases the flow of stomach juices. A large amount of alcohol dulls your appetite and can cause malnutrition. (source)

What have we learnt so far?

So we’ve established some concerning behaviours here.

He eats in excess

He exercises in excess

He drinks in excess (on an empty stomach)

I’m actually going to move onto material from the ‘I Love You’ MV, but intertwine it with some of the remaining points from TIHTBILWY. 

At this point the relationship has progressed, we’re moving into winter which brings with it the holiday season! Yay! Except not yay, because things are starting to look really bad for Mahiru’s boyfriend. We've gone from this:

To this:

The carousel was fine at first but now it’s taking its toll on him. Both of them have tattered clothes but Mahiru looks optimistic, whilst the boyfriend looks very distraught. His cheekbones are visible and overall he looks a lot less healthy. I guess this is a good time to point out how distinct and visible his collarbone has been this entire time by the way? He’s even bonier than before. Not great.

A lot of events occur at this time of year, such as Christmas (celebrated between couples in Japan as more of a lovers holiday) and new years. What happens a lot during that period of time? Food. Lots of it. This point in the year is not ideal for someone suffering from a worsening eating disorder. This is a period of time which someone would want to move very quickly from because they can’t see the end of it.

I think it’s time to read Mahiru’s comment from day 15:

“Happy new years! To celebrate, we went to a shrine.

Predictably, I already have my wish in mind.

May we stay like this until the end of time.

May nobody stand in my way”

She, on the other hand, is very happy for things to remain as they are.

Day 16 - AKA, Oh No Things Have Gone Terribly Wrong

This is where the narrative hits its climax and everything starts to snowball.

Now, we reach this scene where the boyfriend stops walking and breaks down. He kneels on the ground, digs his nails into it, and pleads for... something. Help? An intervention? A stop to this carousel that’s doing him no good and only making his health (physical and mental) worse?

He never speaks. It is a silent plea.

One that Mahiru misses.

Saying I love you but doing what I did, I know I have no right, crossed and covered in sin

My love, it scored an own goal, destroyed my love and me with its weight

Tell me, oh tell me why, can’t I just do it right

What did you do, Mahiru?

I believe that this scene and response:

Is directly parallel to this event:

As in, they’re the same thing. 

One more comment to read:

He’ll be in for a big, delicious surprise once he gets home!

I’ve made SO many notes about his favorite foods, and practiced my butt off!

I can’t wait to see the look on his face when he sees it all.

Her love - her surprise buffet to cheer him up - scored an own goal, so to speak.

I don’t think I need to say much about this picture, or this scene. She’s giving him excess but that excess is literally driving him over the edge. The nuance is lost between them, and they both need different things from each other and they’re not getting it. Cake to rats, rats to cake.

They’re back on the carousel, spinning around and around with things never changing, no end in sight.

I want to end on this frame of the MV. You see the pole behind the boyfriend? It’s reminding me of rope, and of a certain visual at the end of the video. The juxtaposition of Mahiru forcing her ‘love’ onto him, and of suicidal ideation being the only way off this ride and his problems.

#milgram #mahiru shiina #analysis #long post #eating disorder tw #anorexia tw #bulimia tw #this is how to be in love with you #ai nan desu yo #I love you #daisuki #I DID THE THING and it's... long. and sad :( #this was a really interesting interpretation to write! it's certainly not bulletproof but I truly believe this guy had problems in life #and mahiru couldn't have changed that fact. did she help? not really! did things get bad bad? y. yeah. but! ... #...I have nothing uplifting to say here. her love was plentiful and well meaning but woefully misguided </3 #I genuinely care about this nameless character now... he looks so happy at the start embracing her and im certain in better-- #--days between them they were having a great lovey dovey time!! ugH my heart it hurts..... #if there's typos it's because it's late and I'm tired LMAO

[shima-draws]

Rewatching FT and noticing that Happy is like. SUPER knowledgeable about a lot of things guild and magic related. He's like the go to encyclopedia for wizard inquiries and he's just a tiny little guy. I wonder if he actually takes time to study all this stuff or if he's just picked up on a lot of it from being around the guild so much 🤔 Thinking about Happy and Levy cooped up in the library reading stuff together makes me really soft. Autism buddies

#Fairy Tail #FT Happy #Happy #Shima speaks #Whenever Happy's like 'Oh yeah that thing you don't know Lucy is this! Let me explain it in great detail for you' #I'm like HAPPY YOUR TISM IS SHOWING #And when he sees a spell coming he's like 'I KNOW THAT SPELL IT DOES THIS AND THAT BE CAREFUL' #Me: HAPPY HOW DO YOU KNOW ALL THIS STUFF #I really love characters who are super knowledgeable about stuff that interests them #(Fyonn is kinda like that in ATS he acts as the QA guy on guild and magic related things. Lol)