#I'm seriously trying

[robntunney]

#taylor swift #taylor swift lyrics #song lyrics #i made dis #it's been a bad brain couple of weeks #and I'm just trying to keep my head on straight #i'm seriously trying

[polarisbibliotheque]

when do u think youll be done with the we shall never surrender project??

Hi, dear! That's a great question, thanks for sending it in!

To be quite honest with you all: I don't know.

There's a few reasons for that, so bear with me a little, please "^^

1 - I'm on a sudden art mentoring program with a friend who offered it to me freely.

I've been unemployed and ill for quite a while and a 'friend' of mine literally scammed me and stole all the money I had left, so I'm officially broke. That's been stealing my nights of sleep, because I'm trying to figure something out to make some money and at least pay my credit card every month.

When I mentioned with my mentor I might try to get in the art industry, she was over the moon and took me in for training free of charge and help me as she can so I can get a job. That being said, I'm focusing 1000% on that - hence why I disappear for so long: in less than a month, I've finished 600+ drawings.

Yes, I'm crazy. But this is the only shot I've got after a long period of distress and not knowing what to do. I'm giving it all to it.

2 - I decided to use this mentoring time to improve my art and apply it to the requests of the Shall Never Surrender Project!

I always thought I could do better with the requests - I don't want to deliver something bad and half assed. This last month, I feel like I improved so much, I wanted to wait a little bit to deliver something with a better quality!

3 - My health sometimes kicks me down and so I need to choose carefully what I have energy to do.

As you guys know, I'm trying to recover from an illness and I have a chronic illness as well. I don't eat much and that means sometimes I don't have enough energy to get up from my bed.

There are days I start being productive at 3 p.m - I spend all the morning lying down, gathering energy to tank the day and taking a few naps. There are other days, I can't even bring myself to eat 'cause I feel like I'm going to pass out midway to the kitchen.

Think Vergil dragging his ass out of Hell and crumbling apart at the beginning of DMC5. That's it, literally, I'm not being dramatic.

I have to prioritize what I can do during my days, then. Usually, I prioritize my mentoring, then helping my mom with chores and running errands and then, by night, I'm already very tired. If there's any energy left, I try to write - for the blog here or the book I'm trying to write - and then work on the Shall Never Surrender Project.

It's slow. Very slow. But it's going.

4 - Nevertheless, I want to finish the requests of the Project before starting comissions.

Like I said, I'm broke. And, as you might have seen, I opened commissions to help a friend of my mom who is in a worse situation than mine and really needs some help.

I want to finish the Project requests before any commissions start coming in, because I do feel guilty for making you guys wait so long. I thought I could deal with requests of full, coloured and polished artworks quickly, but I can't.

That was a foolish overestimation of my part and I am sorry.

Even then, people don't commish me a lot. I had a few commissions some years ago, but I gotta tell ya, it's VERY rare for me to get something. Even then, I need to try. For this friend of my mom and for me, eventually.

If I'm not wrong, there are 3 requests for me to finish. I'm working on them in the order people have requested, and honestly, I hope to finish them soon.

I'm really sorry for taking so long, but life sometimes runs over us and we are caught like a deer on headlights.

I know this might feel like a sassy response, but it isn't. I'm really happy you asked and I can explain a few things/give you guys some idea of what's going on and apologize for taking so long :)

#polaris speaks #shall never surrender project #polaris answers #answered asks #art requests #the guilt of taking so long spikes my anxiety 10/10 #but don't worry guys #I didn't forget you #I'm seriously trying #I'm not really used to not being 100% when it comes to my health #like I said about Vergil #he kills me as a character 'cause I get it #I'd do whatever I could to get my healthy self back quickly #and to make things even more amazing #this mentor of mine when I was talking about my job that caused my burnout #she literally said 'you've been through hell. you've been through hell and dragged yourself out' #and all I could hear was Vergil singing Bury the Light at the top of his lungs in the eye of a storm :) #it isn't drama when I say I came very VERY close to dying #everyone who lives around me says how half dead I was for the past 3+ years

[vynnyal]

Some comics

#rain world #comic #rw hunter #five pebbles #spearmaster #rivulet #artificer #First one is back when I first started to learn how play the game seriously #And was super jumpy about enemies because of it. Kept killing things before our buddy had the chance to try #I'm better now lmfao but it was still funny #Also I never draw riv the same way twice. Literally #I just choose a random pink purple and blue #Hope it works out #art

[faggy--butch]

Trans men and women tend to get viewed as either disgusting male freaks or perfect feminine female goddesses based entirely on identity and vibes alone, forcing trans men to either detranstion to talk about the issues faced, or shut up and hate themselves and grovel at the feet of their "betters", and trans women are forced to preform the highest standards of femininity or be shunned and live in fear of being cast out and not being "woman enough" facing the constant need to prove themselves to avoid being seen as interlopers. these things are similar, these problems overlap, and yet people go on to pretend that one is the most victimized victim and the other is the "subjector and oppressor" (Interchangeable) and neither can truly understand the other. these ideas being perpetuated by others within and outside of these groups. It drives me up the wall that there are people pretending this helps anyone, that either benefits from the others oppression in anyway. Personally, from what I've seen a lot of it comes out as like gender insecurity, from the inside groups, which is pretty sad, but also extremely frustrating to be lashed out at for being unwilling to accept this gender essentialist false binary

#transandrophobia #transmisogny #ftm #mtf #queer #I'm seriously done hearing trans men say they feel like creeps and monsters and oppressors for just being men #and then act like its normal and okay and not fucked up to think about ones self that way? #a trans man yesterday was trying to convince me that trans men need to shut up and let women say things like kill all men #because actually all men ARE trash #like bro literally speak for yourself

[emin-folly]

Yeah I'm sorry but I seriously don't buy the whole "Batman can sneak up on Kryptonians and other superpowered aliens/people cause he's ~Batman~" BS

Personally what I think would be much more in character and frankly way funnier is if just about every superhero can see/detect Batman, they all just choose to humor him cause of his fragile ego lmao 

 Low effort comic cause I tired aha

#Look I'm sorry but are you *seriously* trying to tell me that Superman who can hear a pin drop on the other side of the planet can't hear #Bruce's noisy ass two feet from him???? Yea nah fam #That's just Clark being really polite (and good at acting) #You can't convince me otherwise lol #Don't really like this one but meh #What can you do #dc #dc comics #superman #clark kent #batman #bruce wayne #my art

[magnusbae]

Obsessed with how Obi-Wan calls Anakin right after having a conference call with the other Jedi Masters because the moment Anakin said he'll do as 'instructed' Obi-Wan knew with absolute confidence that the little shit will most certainly not do as instructed

#Why‚ yes‚ I did start watching The Clone Wars for my very first time~ #The Clone Wars #Star Wars The Clone Wars #Anakin Skywalker #Obikin #Obi Wan Kenobi #Obi-Wan Kenobi #ahsoka tano #ahsoka #anakin #star wars #i seriously LOVe this for them Obi-Wan really didn't even bother being mad he just immediately asked Anakin if he was successful #i'm not very good with video altering this is my second video ever but i had to try for the cause esgveb #buns.all #buns.edits #userjasmine #obi wan

[ccycloneblogging]

"...You were actually alive, weren't you? What's it like?"

After seeing @crazycakeparrotart 's lovely addition to the other post, I couldn't help myself! I had to draw the doggos interacting - though my DogDay might still be a little too big by comparison lol

#smiling critters #dogday #Toon DogDay just loves nicknames. He has one for every single one of his loved ones #Seriously. Cake's version of DogDay is so much fun to draw #though I'm still trying to get a good grasp on him.

[homkamiro]

sniperscout marriage 🥺

"Man, if we've been dating for so long...does it mean we will have to get married?"

#i can't think of scout having a wedding seriously tbh but maybe in the future when they are like #in their 30s then yeah!!! super cool!!!!!! #also i think of resetting the ask or keep them closed until i finish my diploma projects. there's a lot of them #so be patient okay i'm trying my best sniff #team fortress 2 #tf2 #team fortress 2 fanart #tf2 fanart #tf2 scout #tf2 sniper #speeding bullet #sniperscout

[inverse-problem]

if you go to an active construction site with lots of heavy machinery and close your eyes you can imagine that’s what gay robot sex sounds like

#yeah okay posting this #inverse problem.txt #suggestive #robophilia #okay seriously though do not try this at home #comply with your local safety regulations #don't walk onto the site unless you have permission and necessary personal protective equipment and knowledge of necessary procedures etc #this post is a joke etc etc #adding all the obligatory disclaimers bc of some of the notes I'm seeing here lol

[kathaynesart]

Let’s just say I have a lot on my plate at the moment but I’m so grateful for all the support you guys have shown me through these past busy months. Thank you as always for your patience with my slow updates and maybe I’ll find some time to sketch something for the TMNT AU Competition later on @tmntaucompetition Hopefully some of these projects will be finally wrapped up in the next few months and I can return to Replica 100%

Also fun fact about me. Sometimes I get a little carried away with world building. Normally my friends and collaborators keep me on a tight leash, but now I’m completely unsupervised and reaping what I’ve deeply sewn. For better or for worse.

NOTE: Don't be scared, my question shouldn't have much impact on the actual story of Replica... I just like to know all the little details.

#i just wanted to tell a story about silly/sad turtles #how did it come to this? #I'm in too deep #but seriously where did all the water go in the opening of the movie? #it must have been after most of the skeletons ended up in there because it's more likely the bodies were washed out to sea #did the krang evaporate it all later to try and kill off the resistance? #ok I'll stop #replica #replica propoganda #? #tmnt au competition

[jeeaark]

I will never be able to do the sunset scene justice. I will never be able to recreate the most beautiful, romantic confession, character growth showing, most heart-pouring-out mushy bits you ever did see in a githyanki. Because I.

Am a fool.

Who really wanted a dialogue option asking if keeping an illithid in the squad was gonna be a deal-breaker with this relationship.

Probably woulda ruined the tender moment pitching the piña colada friendship there.

....100% it would.

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 spoilers #bg3 #bg3 fanart #bg3 comic #lae'zel #greygold #babe's taking that protective love language very seriously #But seriously every conversation with lae'zel during act 3 felt like I was one wrong dialogue option away with her breaking up with me #The dawning horror when you realize the sole joy of your life is trying to befriend your brain-eating mortal enemy #The dawning horror when you realize you've placed all your joy in an optimistically delusional fool #This is probably validating Lae'zel's fear of sharing her heart #because she placed her heart in Greyg and Greyg is now cowabungaing off a cliff into redeem-the-irredeemable-or-die-trying-ville #I'm so sorry Lae'zel kladjfkdjf #remember when I said relationships can get bumpy~?

[bluespiritshonour]

here's 18-19 year old aang sketches. been hearing aang is ugly discourse—no he ain't. he was just 12.

#i really wanted to take part in zukaang bingo but the urge to art struck me a little later #i still might make something else later #enough art for now #i'd try to participate in maiko week but i'm not sure #it's smack in the middle of end semester exams #ink blot #avatar fanart #avatar the last airbender #atla #artists on tumblr #fanart #avatar aang #why did i never use the pencil brush before?!?! i seriously have a personality flaw where i just don't explore stuff. #can you believe i've been using the same fucking brush for lineart ever since i started digital art? #anyways! i don't know how the pencil brush would feel like if i go for colours but this is impeccable. #I have more control over stuff and i love the result #so #i have promised myself i'd be fucking off this hellsite because i have a huge backlog of work that needs to be done #and i'm presently suffering from “can't help but art”. so #yeah. y'all would probably see me around maiko week. byeee! #if i deprive myself of drawing for too long it bursts out of me like this where i do nothing but draw #not healthy at all

[miraculousbohemian]

i'm so fucking tired of heteros ffs GIVE ME PEGGYNAT

also natasha in this entire episode is just *gay yearning* for a certain Brit

Melina just goes slipping shit like "ah go for her left knee she fucked it up in third grade" LIKE MA'AM.

WANDA?! WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA WANDA

#that's a lot of wandas #anyway I'm seriously tired of steggy. seriously. #LET ME HAVE THE GAYS #also if you try to convince me lake bell didn't fight to keep the yearning in I'll dropkick you onto Neptune #if i had a nickel for every time lake bell voices a redhead whos very gay (in canon and fannon) I'd have two nickels #which isnt a lot but its weird that it happened twice #mb rant :) #what if #peggynat #c'mon kevin. you don't have the balls- #mcu #marvel #natasha romanoff #melina vostokoff #steve rogers #peggy carter #captain carter #I'm gonna go rewatch episode two bye bye

[annamaryllis]

richard making luke's feelings towards annabeth weird was such a fuckup bc it makes people uncomfortable with sympathizing with him when it's imperative to the story that you do

#and I'm just talking about when he's all like “did you love me” and #when they continue to bring up that he eventually “returned her feelings” in the hermes staff short story and in hoo #i think it makes sense for luke to be creepy and try to manipulate her feelings towards him #but him returning them and everyone treating it with seriousness is a whole other thing... #luke castellan #pjo #✏️

[definitelyalmosthuman]

Click the link I promise nothing bad will happen 🙂💌

#I'm seriously losing my mind #sorry #webnovel #tapas creator #tapas novel #tapas.io #tapas webnovel #I'm gonna run out of tags Jesus #respectfully yours novel #if I don't rip all my hair out trying to promote this book I'll call that a win

[untitled-tmnt-blog]

I don't understand how all you angst writers here do it. I'll draw like, 2-3 scratch marks on a character and go -- oh no! I've hurt him too much! He's so injured, can't do any more, nuh-uh. Gotta stop there.

#rottmnt #I mean I guess this applies to everything really #but I'm specifically referring to turtles here #I'll read a really awesome fic where a poor turtle (usually leo) practically gets beaten half to death #then when I try to draw a scene from it #it looks like he just tripped on the sidewalk or walked into a door #seriously - how do you all do it? #my post