#I'm trying for every other day at least if not daily but.. you know lol.. Life

[lucalicatteart]

Poll adventure (paventure? lol) Day 9: read the small story tidbit below the poll for more details, OR just vote based on initial impression

(✦ see past poll results + further information HERE (link) ✦)

Yesterday's poll helped The Adventurer build his raft...

"After two hours of fumbling about with tangled rope and tree branches, he's finally produced something that at least.. mostly, looks like a normal raft. He attaches a few extra flowers for decoration, loops his cat into a makeshift safety harness (so they can't get lost in the water), then gives everything one last check before deciding it's all ready to go, nervously pushing off into the river...

Surprisingly, it floats just fine. As long as he doesn't make any sudden movements, the raft doesn't threaten to flip over, or even wobble nearly as much as he expected. There's no way to really steer or paddle, but he does have a large stick he occasionally uses to push himself away from rocks or other obstacles. Luckily, the current is very slow at this section of the river, and hopefully will remain so for his entire trip.

Just lazily floating around, he estimates he should travel about 4 hours to fully get past the blocked road and end up at the next area on his map. Though the raft is too small (and too lumpy) to comfortably lay on, he can still recline slightly, bathing in the near afternoon sun, watching the scenery slowly drift by....

About 30 minutes into his first ever sailing adventure, he feels the water shift as a larger boat comes near. He can't see it clearly yet, but it seems to be nice - polished wood with painted sections and little flags draped along the sides, presumably some sort of actual steering and propelling mechanisms, and about 10 people lounging on the surface, maybe having some sort of party..? It's been very quiet so far, these are the first other travelers he's seen in the entire area today... Should he attempt to make contact with them? "

--------

Additional details -

Boat Make-up : Based on the results of the last poll (where people helped him make a boat by choosing the amount of materials) -- With 30% branches and 21% rope, there's only a 9% difference between them, so both are in pretty close amounts, which means there's a TON of rope. (normal ratio would be like 65% wood and 10% rope lol). I probably should have even added more, but it's so visually busy, just pretend there's extra rope wrapped under the boat too.

30% branch and 15% fabric means there's about half as much fabric as there is wood, which is also A LOT for just a little side decoration, so I made the flag huge, and a square of fabric for the cat to sit on. 10% berries means that there's enough ink for 1/3 of the wood to be entirely covered in purple designs. The least amount was the twigs and leaves for padding, which would cover a little under 1/3 of the wood (laid on top). then a little over 1/3 of the space is flowers for decor, which are just kind of sitting in a pile on top, with a few actually tied down onto the flag or other areas.

Since the branches were pretty close in percentage to all other things (not like 80% branches and 20% all other materials), the raft is fairly small, as not much wood was used.

main goal: follow his map to reach the abandoned castle ruins and see the rare animal specialist about the mysterious egg he has

#paventure posting #polls #choose your own adventure #hghnhh... yes.. this is very late lol #I'm trying for every other day at least if not daily but.. you know lol.. Life #It snowed here which like YEAAAAAAA my favorite weather ever!! but it's also always annoying because of transportation #I hate how car-centric america is and how it's no necessary to drive to get places #I loooooove the snow so much but I also hate driving in it or anyone I know or any of my roomates or anything having to drive #in it. because the day after it snows everything always freezes into a flat sheet of ice at night and nobody can drive on it #because this area is not used to it and it's very hilly so then it just ends up being A Thing where everyone gets stranded on the #road side or cant make it up a hill and people are just out there sliding around anyway risking their lives #because everyting is always like a 20-30 minute drive away and most poeple cant just walk to their work or the market #and the public transport system is not robust or reliable enough to get them around instead. #which lukcily I dont have to deal with too much but every time it gets really snowy and icy I still get nervous and unfocused and #distracted by the threat of the possibility of me or my roomates having to go somewhere lol #and then also I'm busy outside because I spend time in the snow on and off through the day so I get distracted by that too #I've probably walked an hour a day or more the past few days just because I HAVE to go out and be in the snow #I love the feeling when it's like 26 degrees outside and it's windy and yersterday's snow is like blowing everywhere in little clouds #and there's like ice on your face and you can just plop down into a pile of snow and lay on your back looking up at the sky #Which I do try to be careful but I probably will stil lget frostbite at some point in my life. I take it seriously and try to bundle up but #I cannot resist just being out in the cold. If not for the aspect of trasnportation woes and the occasional power outage it would #be paradise. I think because I'm so warm natured I just feel less sick. less achey. less dizzy and weird when I'm cold #Whatever health things I have going on with me it seems to help them. And is just beautiful and perfect #ANYWAY.. I finally focused enough to get one of these done. I'm still trying to work on other things and ease back into a normal #schedule if I ever can.. be productive for once. The past month or two has been so weird and hard to accomplish things because I just #keep having physical issue flare ups or schedule disruptions or etc. hhrghghh #but here he is! on his boat! Still trying to get to the Innkeeper's brother's abandoned castle ruins lol. but it was mentioned #it'll be a long journey. he probably has to make it a few more days before he's close to there (if he even makes it there) #It's all part of the journey!

[notyourhetloki]

Ken with a gn doll!reader love interest

Reader: gender neutral

/Ken x Doll!Reader/

A/N: Guess who's obsessed lol anyway... This is NOT spoiler free! In fact, this is set AFTER the movie! I gave Ken a redemption arc because I think he'd be willing to better himself so here you go...

Word Count: 1348

—

How it started:

You were hanging out with Allan at the beach when suddenly Ken approached you, waving and smiling as he spoke: “Hey Allan! Hey (Y/N)! Wanna play volleyball?”

Allan glanced nervously at you before you two agreed, following Ken through the sand.

The game was fun but you were losing, that is until you had the chance to score, jumping up in the air and striking the ball with full force… hitting Ken right in his face.

He dramatically fell back, face covered with his hands while groaning. You quickly ran to him, kneeling on the sand and patting his shoulder. “Ken! Are you okay??”

He revealed his face, slowly blinking while examining you. You worried he was mad... you were new in Barbieland and didn’t want to make any enemies. What if he hated you?

“That… was… AWESOME. How did you learn to plunge like that??” Ken gave you a big smile, and you couldn’t help but reciprocate.

How it went:

You had been hanging out with Ken a lot lately, spending time at the beach or at your Dream House (all dolls had their own house now, including Kens). He even invited you to his Mojo Dojo Casa House (yes he still called it that) to watch some movies, and you gladly accepted.

He was nice to be around, always glad to help with whatever you needed and always excited for your next activity together. He was goofy and made you laugh, which made him feel good about himself.

And because the way to his heart was through his ego, you two became best friends as soon as you started complimenting him. He even admired you back, making you feel all fuzzy inside.

Ken was ridiculously charming, and you felt yourself falling harder with each moment you spent side by side. But, you had to remind yourself you were not Barbie, and he was Ken... He couldn't possibly be interested in you... right?

Besides, you knew he had a lot to learn yet. After the incident with Kendom and the whole patriarchy thing, he started studying sociology and began a journey to better himself, and you were happy to be there to help.

You reminded him of his daily mantras ("I'm kenough") and accompanied him every time he visited the library for more books. Ken cringed while you reminded him about the past. “At least you apologized to Barbie, right?”

“…”

“RIGHT?”

And just like that the two of you were on an adventure to the Real World, for Ken had a very important mission.

—

You had never been on rollerblades before, so as you arrived at the Real World, you started to wobble. Luckily, Ken caught your hand and continued to hold it, helping you balance. You felt heat rising to your cheeks, blushing at the unexpected touch and intimacy. (Unbeknownst to you, Ken was blushing hard as well, trying not to think much of it. You were just friends, right? This was normal… right?)

You both found Barbie, and you were proud to hear Ken’s apology as he spoke. “I’m… I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything, Barbie. For trying to install patriarchy in Barbieland, for stealing your house, for all of it! You don’t need to accept my apologies, but I just needed you to know that I’m trying to better myself every day, and (Y/N) is helping me with that!” While Ken looked ashamed, Barbara looked shocked.

In the end, she accepted his apologies and smiled at you as you waved your goodbyes.

Ken felt immense relief and happiness now that he took this new step in his self-growth journey. He was so happy in fact, that he felt like holding your hand again. You both looked at each other and smiled, hearts racing and faces blushing.

—

You were in his Mojo Dojo Casa House, chatting and giggling like teenagers. Ken started asking about you, very interested in everything you had to say. He was fascinated and wanted to know more about you, and soon he caught himself asking more intimate things. “So… do you have a girlfriend? Or… a boyfriend? I mean… I don’t know, are you even into Kens? I mean…” he stuttered as you laughed.

“No, I don’t have a girlfriend or boyfriend… in fact, I never had a significant other before…”

Ken’s blue eyes grew wide, mouth slightly agape as he slid closer to you. “Oh… really?”

“I mean… I’m not a Barbie, not a Ken… not sure I’m even supposed to have someone.” You suddenly grew a little sad at that, being so vulnerable with Ken all of a sudden.

You looked down in shame, but Ken quickly lifted your chin up so you looked at him. His expression was fond, eyes roaming through your face and finally landing on your lips. He grew closer and for a moment you actually thought he would kiss you.

But he didn’t, he stopped and moved back, suddenly a bit confused and anxious. “Ha… I’m… I’m sure you’ll find someone eventually…” he said with an awkward smile.

How it ended:

Ken was desperate when he asked Allan for help. He was so confused, so… eager. He had never felt this way before, not even with Barbie. You were different, you listened to him, inspired him to become a better person, spent your valued time with him and you two had so much fun together! He felt genuinely happy around you, and in the last times you hung around, he felt the deepest urge to kiss you. This desire had been growing the more he tried pushing it away, so he decided to ask for help.

“I mean… (Y/N) is not a Barbie, and I’m Ken! It doesn’t make sense, right?”

Allan looked at him with slight confusion as he responded. “I mean… there are truly no rules, it’s not like there’s a book written somewhere that Kens should only date Barbies.”

Ken was left starstruck because I mean, Allan was right. There are no such rules in Barbieland, that was just something everyone assumed one day. “Thank you, Allan!” He hugged his friend before heading out.

—

Ken invited you on a beach date night and you happily agreed. You two sat on the sand as you watched the waves, but he only had eyes for you.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” You wondered about the sea and the stars. “Yeah…” he answered, not looking at them.

Slowly, Ken moved his fingers to touch yours, and while turning your head to look at him, you let your hands completely meet.

Your heart beat fast as he smiled that gorgeous smile of his, cheeks rosy and eyes glowing blue as he finally spoke. “(Y/N)… can I ask you something?”

“Of course, Ken.” You smiled in anticipation.

He looked down, doubting himself a bit before looking up again and almost whispering. “Can I kiss you?”

At that moment everything made sense, and you couldn’t help the big smile on your face as you spoke. “Of course!”

He matched your smile and squeezed your hand in excitement before turning away a bit and fist-pumping the air, then turning back with a more collected expression on his face.

Ken stared at your mouth before leaning in, and you leaned as well. Slowly, you met in the middle and finally kissed. Gentle, he grinned against your lips.

The first kiss was quick, but as you stopped and looked into each other’s eyes, he came back crushing onto your mouth, not wanting to be separate anymore. Ken took your face into his hands and you grabbed him by the collar of his shirt.

You both needed to breathe eventually, so you parted. You took the opportunity to ask a very important question. “Ken? Would you…would you like to be my boyfriend?”

Ken gasped, his eyes growing wide and teary as he held your hands in his. “That would be the coolest thing to ever happen to me… yes!”

The two of you hugged tight, and for the first time in forever, everything felt just right.

—

#ken #ken x reader #ken x you #barbie ken #ryan gosling #gender neutral #ken x gn reader #imagine #fanfic #headcanon #self insert #fanfiction #y/n #notyourhetloki

[spicyllewyn]

Kinktober 5. - Pregnant / lactation.

Will Dempsey x F!Reader.

Tags & warnings. Pregnancy + lactation. (+18)

As you all know I hate Will for no real reason, this is my peace offering to a fictional character, lol.

Word count. 2K

Summary. You love babying him.

Kinktober masterlist.

Pregnancy was becoming unbearable at times; you felt heavy, your feet ached even after just a few steps around the house, and sleeping at night was turning into a daily battle. Fortunately, there was no doubt in your mind that you had chosen the right life partner.

The only thing keeping you sane right now was Will and how he went out of his way to make you happy and make this whole thing more bearable.

You always joked with him, saying that anyway, all of this was his fault, so the least he could do for you was to fulfill your cravings and massage your shoulders until you fell asleep.

Oh, and that pillow with a hole in the center that allowed you to lie face down.

"I miss my pillow," you murmured in a low tone as you remembered it. You closed the door behind you slowly.

Will's room was just as he had left it several years ago when he left home for college, where he met you. Nonetheless, you wandered around with curiosity, looking at his movie posters that perhaps only he had seen, and the occasional Lego figure that you doubted he would let his future child touch someday.

"I told you we could come up with some excuse."

"Every time you suggest we make up an excuse, it has to do with pretending that one of us died," you rolled your eyes. "Your parents are not believing it for more than two times in a row." When you had 4 walls around you for privacy, your hands went to the hem of your shirt, getting rid of it, clearly tired of wearing any type of clothing.

Will watched you from the bed, as if you were giving him a personal show. His eyes roaming over your bare skin, always lingering a few extra seconds on your breasts before looking up again and pretending that the lack of sex wasn't killing him.

You were both too introverted to simply ask at gynecologist appointments, “Hey, is it wise to have uncontrolled sex against some furniture at this point in pregnancy?” so you just assumed the answer was no.

“Did you do something to your hair?”

You frowned at his question.

"What?"

“I'm serious, I notice something different about you.”

One of his pillows landed right in his face, making him laugh. You already knew that joke too well.

“Yes, idiot, I'm pregnant.” The mattress squeaked as you lay down, only wearing your loose pants and the sports bra that had become your best friend a few days ago because it turns out that your normal bras decided they didn't want to close anymore eventually.

That was the only piece of fabric that kept your tits in place, tight and comfortable. It was also a headache for Will.

The changes that pregnancy had made in your body never ceased to amaze him even though he had analyzed each one for hours as the months passed. There was the obvious, that completely new sparkle in your eyes, your cheeks flushed 24/7 and your skin seemed to be glowing more than ever.

But on the other hand there were the things that made him fantasize about the nights he stayed on the couch fucking his own hand to try to control the impulses that attacked him more times than he would like lately. Your hips became wider, your thighs were softer but oh, his favorite part was definitely your breasts.

Round, full, hard, delicious.

You were complaining about pain recently and he didn't know if that was a sign that he should help you in some way or just not touch you and wait patiently for the pain to go away in a few weeks when the baby was born.

“Did you know…” He murmured, taking his eyes off his phone for a few seconds to look at you. You did the same.

Lying together to chat or just watch stupid videos on your phones had become routine when the pain in your back kept you from sleeping or when you took too many naps throughout the day and all your energy was reserved for the night.

Yes, Will stayed up with you each and every one of those times.

"Did I know what?"

“Did you know that there are freaks who like milk?”

You frowned.

“I like milk, what's so strange about it?”

He rolled his eyes with a small smile.

“Breast milk, I mean.”

“Oh…” Needless to say, you already knew that the father of your future baby was… peculiar. He had perfectly mastered the act of bringing up the strangest topics of conversation lately. You shrugged. “It doesn't seem that strange to me.”

"No?" If your gaze hadn't returned to your phone you would have noticed the mischievous glint on his eyes.

You had taken the bait.

“No, I mean.” There you went, to reason with the madman, always engrossed in his midnight talks. “You used to suck on my boobs all the time, do you mean you wouldn't do it anymore if there was milk involved? Not to mention that you are addicted to eating me out, it wouldn't be the first time you drink some liquid from my body.”

“Mhm.” He pretended to consider your response before nodding slowly, agreeing with you. The truth is that Will had considered the possibility since he had noticed the circular stains that suddenly began to appear on your shirts. “You have a point.”

"See?" You felt triumphant to think that you had changed his way of thinking. Your gaze returned to your phone and you took the topic for granted.

“Though I don't understand how anyone could be sexually attracted to that.”

You looked up again.

“Are you kidding?”

“Of course not, don't you think it's strange?”

You rolled your eyes, finally lowering your phone and placing it on the cabinet next to you so you could face him.

"Do you want to try?"

"What?" He played dumb and you fell into his trap again.

"Do you want to try? I will show you that there is nothing strange about it.”

He again pretended to consider your proposal and with his lower lip trapped between his teeth he nodded slowly.

"Good." He also put his phone aside, sitting up in bed as if considering which position was best to settle into. His pupils dilated when he saw you take off your top.

He had been trying for a long time not to stare at your completely naked breasts or else we wasn't going to be able to control himself anymore. Your nipples were always hard, occasionally with a drop or two of milk running through them, so sensitive and delicious.

You looked at him, clearing your throat to get his attention.

"Take off your shirt." Your voice sounded like an order.

He obediently did so. His tanned skin making your mouth water and making your cheeks blush even more than usual. You were a hormonal mess a long time ago.

“How should I…?”

“Just lay your head here.” You pointed to the hill where your pregnant belly began, just below your breasts.

“But, I don't want to hurt-”

“You're not going to hurt me, Will.” Your voice came out in frustration as you gave two small taps to the area you had pointed out before. He hesitated a little before taking his place there, the weight of his head and part of his body was not uncomfortable, on the contrary, his body heat felt stupidly good.

Skin to skin contact was something you wouldn't trade for a million dollars.

“You look so pretty like this.” You whispered in a low, loving voice. A dopey smile on your face when you had the chance to see him from a completely new angle.

His huge eyes were fixed on you, he had to look up so he could fix his gaze on you while you looked down. Your fingers gently ran through his hair, a while ago you had noticed that his curls became more noticeable when his hair was a little longer than usual.

“Go on.” You cooed while he licked his lips.

You didn't have to ask twice, Will settled into his spot and took part of your breast into his mouth, pressing his tongue against your hard, sensitive nipple.

A shiver ran down your spine, resulting in a wave of pleasure directly between your legs. A delicious heat pooling on your lower abdomen.

He for his part moaned against your skin. You tasted so sweet.

“T-That's it.” You encouraged him with blushing cheeks. “Just like that, baby.”

It didn't take him long to pick up the pace he wanted, you could hear him gulp and suck, over and over again while your trembling hands ran through his hair slowly, comforting him.

You knew how much he was enjoying it when you saw him close his eyes. A couple of drops running down the edge of his lips.

“You taste so fucking good.” It was the only thing he stammered before going back to his job. He rested the weight of his body on you a little more and you didn't complain, you missed having him on you so much, caging you against any surface that he found and his body.

He raised a hand, his fingers squeezing your breast as if he wanted to squeeze out every last drop. His cock twitched under his baggy pants and you at the same time squeezed your legs together, your slick already making your underwear wet and sticky.

“Do you like it, baby?” Your voice was breathy.

It was incredible how your bodies began to react as if you were a pair of desperate teenagers, seeking relief in any friction you might have with each other.

“Help me with t-the other one, yeah? Please?" You begged when you could finally feel some kind of relief on your tit, it was no longer hard and swollen. All this time you had only needed this? If you had known before.

He looked up with dilated pupils, licking his lips with heavy breathing.

"Please." You whispered once more, your fingers giving his hair a light tug that snapped him out of the spell you seemed to have placed on him with just a few gulps of warm milk.

You gave him a push with your hand and he obeyed, tracing exactly four circles around your right nipple before leaning down again and taking it into his mouth. Now that he was almost face down to reach the other side his hips began a slow rocking motion against the bed.

You, meanwhile, squeezed your legs together, your soft thighs giving you a bit of relief that made you whimper.

“Such a good boy.” You closed your eyes, your chest rising and falling rapidly, finding it impossible to calm the rhythm of your breathing. Eventually you understood that it wasn't just the sensitivity of your body, it was the situation.

Your sweet voice praising him, listening to the way he swallowed and the way he whimpered desperately just from the pleasure that sucking on your tit gave him.

You were no longer hiding the clumsy movements of your hips, nor was he the way he pretended to be fucking the mattress. His sensitive cock throbing every time he rubbed against his favorite blanket.

The friction was giving delicious warmth to his needy erection and your milk was doing the same to his entire body. Warm and delicious running through his throat.

Your thrusts were making the mattress creak under your bodies although you didn't last more than a couple of seconds longer. Abstinence was your best excuse to explain why something like this had led you to have one of the most delicious orgasms of your entire relationship.

It was definitely not what you had done per se, right?

When he pushed himself up so he could kiss you you could taste the milk and his saliva combined. You understood well why the taste had driven him crazy.

“See?” You whispered against his lips. “Not weird at all.”

Tag list. @ninebluehearts @shousha133 @unear7hly @onefinnedwonder-fm @automnepoet @lokisremainingsanity @uncle-eggy @just-a-nightdreamer @spktrgantenk @chinglewingledingledong @queerponcho @faretheeoscar @spideyman-peter

Remember to comment if you want to be on the kinktober tag list!! <3

#life itself #will dempsey #will dempsey x reader #will dempsey smut #will dempsey x you #will dempsey x y/n #life itself will

[twbutterfly-milk]

Hii!

I have a question, will it lead to weight gain if I eat late at night? Were talking midnight-ish. The total of my cals would still fit into my daily budget, so very low. It’s the only time I get to eat without being interrupted and it’s easier to snack than to eat whole ass meals which I don’t do anyway.

Thank you so much for your help!! 🤍

-Anastasia

When u eat really doesn't matter, as long as ur in a calorie deficit, you're losing weight. Tbh i don't even know why people thinking eating at certain times will make them gain. The only problem with eating that late at night is if u don't get ur sleep, you need at least 8hours of sleep, it helps so much with wl (other than the obvious benefits of sleeping enough). Other than that, try putting in movement (all movement is good u don't have to over do it cuz u want it to be sustainable; find the movement you are 1.able to do and 2.doesn't make you feel bad), and try filling urself with nutrient dense foods:fiber, protein and healthy fats help keep u fuller for longer but as long as most of ur meals are volume dense+nutritious+low cal, you can have a small craving on the side and still be in a calorie deficit+be healthy.

The only things ik abt that even have anything to do with WHEN u eat is: prioritising breakfast is healthiest+helps u make better eating decisions throughout the day and gives u ur energy, fasted cardio does burn more fat instead of carbs but then ends up burning more carbs later in the day (so at the end of the day it doesn't actually make a difference and if ur going to be able to exercise better if u eat half an hour before u work out, then don't feel pressured to do it fasted cuz it doesn't rly make a difference), you need at least a little bit of carbs after u exercise cuz then cortisol could break down ur muscle and use it for energy, doctors reccomend eating every 3hrs if that's interesting to u, and i think i read smth abt u burning more calories in ur sleep if u eat smth before bed or smth like that idk i think i read it with a fever/tired(?) So i don't really remember, Idk lol.

Anyways, the main point is to hydrate (at least 2L/day but i'm working on a post explaining how to figure out how much water u need+easy ways to get in more water), sleep at least 8h, move and stay in a calorie deficit, don't worry if that's when ur able to get urself to eat, do it girl. You will still lose weight.

#ed meals #ed relapse #ana bllog #ana meal #ana rant #ana trigger #ed behaviour tw #ed bullshit #ed dairy #ed disorder #ed blogg #ed but not ed sheeran #ed ednotsheeran restriction #ed no sheeran #ed nonsense #ed not ed sheeran #ed not sheeren #tw disordered eating #bulimima #bulim14 #ana advice #ana tricks #an0r3c1a #an0rec1a

[luckstergal]

Yandere Elliott Mod is funny as hell (to me)

Disclaimer: None of this is meant to be taken seriously, this is me rambling into the void and to my friends.

I cannot believe I'm reviewing a mod, lol. Is it a review? I don't know anymore, just giving my take on it.

It's been like 2 weeks since I gave the Yandere Elliott mod a try and honestly I find it more unintentionally hilarious than off-putting in most places.

I felt that some of the moments could be interpreted as genuinely wholesome and sweet if you isolated them (but that's just how context works in a nutshell I suppose. Look, I genuinely thought the insomnia scene and the post-moonlight-jellies scene with adorable, alright?).

The fact that I have to go out of my way to play very different than I ever would have certainly modifies my overall perspective. If I played normally, the only really unsettling thing would be his unhinged letters. Well, one in particular at least. Most of the letters were campy and funny, knowing how melodramatic this character is naturally. Only 1 letter made me and 2 other people I showed it to go "Oh GOD". Everything else? Unintentionally hilarious, or wholesome if you take the obsession letters out. His stalker-schedule was funny as hell. What do I mean by that? How is the "stalker schedule" funny? The mod alters his schedule after 1 heart, so he'll periodically go spy on you on the farm. This was scary only twice for me because I didn't expect it, and there was a long gap between the first time and the second time. Once summer hit, however, it got funny. He was showing up every single day at 6:30 on the dot, except for Friday and Sunday. He was so punctual that I'd look at the clock, see he's about to show up, and prepare myself for my daily convo with him/gift giving if it's Monday and Tuesday. Man was so consistent it was hilarious.

Even better: when he's standing there for so long, his pathfinding kinda... glitches? He'll act like there's something in front of him preventing his movement (like when a player character standing in an NPC's pathing) and suddenly just... book it across the map into the void. Practically died laughing (though I did freak out the first time it happened because I thought "WAIT THIS MOD LETS HIM CHASE YOU?" only for him to run passed and into nothingness)

It actually got a bit lonely in autumn when he stopped showing up and opted to camp outside the mines instead all day. (Elli, sweetie, Ignatius is not going there most of the time because autumn 1 is a busy season for him, come back!) The fact that I have to fully romance all the other bachelors in order to activate one of the legitimately most unhinged aspects of the mod is what throws me off. I know they're fictional characters, but I've always felt icky at multi-dating personally. Just not for me. I pick one and I stick with my decision. Reading the text in the content file is one thing, but I wanted to see the event play out for myself.

After the event, it got hilarious again completely on accident.

Cue Elli not letting Ignatius leave the farm because of his jealousy. It was winter when this happened. The Obsession Cage-Loop event is designed to where Pierre will send you 50 of a random seed packet every day to make up for the fact that you cannot leave.

Crops don't grow in winter.

The mod makes up for this fact by Pierre sending you ANCIENT FRUIT SEEDS. I had over 300 seeds by the time spring hit. Elli straight up SCAMMING Pierre during the Cage-Loop completely on accident. I'm just sitting here thinking "Dang, had I known this would have happened, I'd have activated this sooner AND kept Elli's heart-level low just to get more bang for my buck. Endless supply of Ancient Fruit Seeds just because you're jealous? Yes please!".

After the cage-loop is over, that's pretty much it. Elli apologizes, wants to do better so you feel safe around him, is willing to just be tormented by his jealousy; etc. and things just kinda go... normal??? After that. He still has his eye-brow raising marriage lines afterwards but after everything has passed, he's not too unsettling.

He's just a weirdo who doesn't know how to handle his love.

Other than ONE letter, and the fact that I had to go OUT OF MY WAY to deliberately activate the Cage-Loop event?

This mod vanilla as fuck, lol.

And no, I didn't do the divorce event. I have a history relating to such dark thoughts and even just reading the dialogue in the content file made me uncomfortable.

Overall 10/10 good way to have spent my week between my 2.0 vtuber model work.

--

It also do not help at all that what makes this mod hilarious in my head is that I play as an inhuman farmer who absolutely towers over Elli in every way. Ignatius is not threatened by this obsessive weirdo in the least bit.

#Blog OP #SDV Elliott #Yandere Elliott #Shitposting #For all intent and purposes this is a shitpost don't take me seriously

[pleaseeeimjustagirl]

Your Physical Glow Up 

Most of us when trying to level up are very excited to work on the physical aspect. I know I am. I'm excited about finally getting my dream body, skin, and hair. I have been working so hard this month on being intentional with my habits so I can attain my goals. So in today's blog post, I want to break down the things you should focus on to enhance your physical appearance I will be making more in-detail blog posts about each point<3.

Diet 

This is the most important thing to me that we should all focus on whether you are trying to lose weight, gain weight, or maintain. Your diet can affect a lot. Having a bad diet can affect your gut health causing uncomfortable bloating it can affect your skin giving you bad acne and so many other issues. Depending on your goal try to find a diet that best fits what you're going for that can be intuitive eating, vegan, paleo, keto, or whatever other diets you might want to follow. Watch YouTube videos do your research on the diets also find out how many calories you should be eating daily. Always consult your doctor especially if you have medical issues. WATER I know some girlies aren’t big fans of water lol but you need water! I wish I could put a bigger emphasis on the need for water it's a must especially when it comes to your skin and overall body health. If you don't like drinking water you can put lemons or other fruits in your water. My favorite item to use to give my water a boost of flavor is flavored packets they sell them every where and they are very low in calories ranging from 0-10 Cals. Finally, your gut health I know you have been hearing about this all over tik tok this topic is so deep ill be making a separate post for it but yes gut health is so important it can affect our physical appearance causing us to look bloated or inflamed. So do your research on how to improve your gut health and expect a post soon <3.

Exercise 

Get your body moving babe! Exercise can be fun find a form of exercise that makes you feel good and that you enjoy. I think the reason why a lot of us do not enjoy working out is because we are doing what everyone else is doing instead of doing what makes us happy. Some people might love HIIT workouts and you might like something more low-impact like pilates and the next girl could like walking 5 miles every day. Figure out what best suits you dibble and dabble in different forms of exercise. And yes I know sometimes we will have to do exercise we don’t like to get a certain look I recently started weight training at first I did not like it but now I love ittt! It makes me feel so good and I have been seeing results and the more results I see the harder I want to go in the gym. Also, you do not have to pay for memberships to be able to do pilates and yoga YouTube has a lot of amazing women who will get you right. So look at your goals figure out what aligns with them and be consistent.

Rest

Sleep is very important and the most overlooked. You need to get at least 7 hours of sleep every night. Start training your body to sleep more no more late nights. Of course, staying up here and there is understandable but you shouldn’t be staying up and going to sleep by 3 am every single day. Take it easy allow yourself to rest! Do not overwork yourself to achieve your goals. With patience, you will reach your goals in the blink of an eye, and you’ll be where you want to be.

Skincare 

First figure out what skincare type you have and the type of products that are best for your skin. I have hyperpigmentation and dark spots it's not extremely bad but I do not like it and would like my skin to be one color and clear. So I did some research on what I could try to get the skin that I wanted. I recently started using Kojic acid, Cosrx, MediCube, and Neutrogena. Also, sunscreen is important for all of us to use. I'm a black girl if you haven't realized yet lol but growing up I heard black people do not need sunscreen yesss we do! I recently started getting into anti-aging skin care as well still doing my research. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be youthful you can't stop aging but you can slow it down.

These were the basic things to focus on when trying to physically level up if you want me to go more in-depth let me know. I'll be making posts on each separately over the next couple of weeks.

I'm open to any comments or private messages if you can relate and please let me know any further topics you want me to cover<3

#becoming that girl #becoming her #healthy living #healthy diet #healthy eating #wellness #health and wellness #wellness era #wellbeing #green juice girl #clean girl #that girl #pink pilates princess #pink pilates girl #wonyoungism #that girl lifestyle #that girl energy #that girl routine #diet #dream girl #it girl energy #self love #self care #glow up #it girl

[prettyboysdontlookatexplosions]

year in review

one thing i did this past year was set my "win condition" for daily habit resolutions at 183 days in the year, because if you do something on 183 days in a year, that means you technically did it most of the time. i found this really motivational because it meant everything counted but there was also a lot of room for slack, and i feel like even for the resolutions i did not do so hot on that style of tracking gave me information and helped me think about what i really want out of that habit. so i am definitely planning to repeat it this year! as for the actual daily resolutions, they kind of fell into four categories.

nailed it

spend some time with some art: 232 days

work out: 216 days 💪🏼

drink at least 64 ounces of water: 277 days

pretty good

log my little habits & other trackables: 189 days

don't go on the internet before noon: 189 days (but see earlier posting about how i don't really feel like that addressed what i wanted it to address)

nice try

write out a plan for my day: 164 days

make something with words or with my hands: 153 days

get my room back into its baseline acceptable condition: 135 days

abject failures

meditate (147 days), journal (116 days), yoga (69 days) - yoga i just never found a place in my routine for this year but the other two i'm putting into this category even their numbers are not that high because i actually started off pretty strong and then just fully stopped around the beginning of september because life was hard. then like a month later i started having a mental breakdown where i couldn't stop crying and/or thinking about death. coincidence? you decide! (it's almost definitely not.)

i also had some goals to accomplish for the end of the, areas i wanted to make progress in without a specific endpoint, & vibes to cultivate, with mixed results:

memorize at least one (1) keyword/phrase for each tarot card - lol no

listen to sondheim's full body of work in chronological order - lol no

finish all unread books in my room - lol no

get my apartment into a state that would be okay for guests - lol no

post all WIPs - partial credit! i had a very ambitious count of 12 in mind when i made this resolution; i wound up posting 5 and a half, one of which was for & event and not on the list. idk i feel good about this tbh, especially since i did post everything that already had a substantial amount of writing in gdocs when i started the year (so, like, really all True WIPs rather than WIPs + various half-baked notions) and i like pretty much every fic i posted a lot.

up my walking till i'm regularly hitting 70k a week - i didn't put this one in my app for some reason and i am definitely too lazy to go through 12 months of notebooks but a glance at my apple health app suggests... sure? kinda? definitely for a while and then i got sick and then it got cold and dark and less so since then?

make progress towards figuring out routines that serve me: i... think so, yes? i spent a lot of this year, especially the spring and summer, just feeling sooooo dysregulated physically and fatigue-embattled and so on and so forth, and although my sleep cycle at the moment is not ideal, i am not, like, beset every day by the challenge of having a physical body anymore. i don't have one single daily routine i swear by, which is what i always fantasize about even though i know i would inevitably get bored of it and reject it (cap sun / sag stellium problems........), but i have some mini-routines i feel like i can call on, and i also have a set of meals that are boring but easy and reliable to eat basically every day so that i am not spending all of my disposable income on take-out anymore, and i also definitely now think of myself as A Person Who Works Out, so.... yes. i'm gonna say yes.

figure out a way to tackle my gigantic and ever-increasing Backlog Of Tasks: lmao no. not even a little bit.

make progress towards feeling more connected: i think so on this one, too. my most socially proactive friend moved out of the country for six months this spring and as the date of her departure was approaching i realized that i could either watch my social calendar virtually disappear for half a year or i could Try Harder, and then i did try a little bit harder and it went pretty okay. as much as part of me really wanted to, i did not drop my efforts during my extremely busy september/october, either. so.... yeah!

make progress towards fiscal responsibility: yeah. not, like, in leaps and bounds or anything, but i am definitely 3000% less stressed about money than i was a year ago.

stop treating everything like an emergency: hmmmm. i think i did well on this one for things that i can or should or need to take action on, but not so well for things i actually can't - like, i've gotten better at reminding myself that it, whatever it is, isn't fucking brain surgery, and in the worst case scenario life goes on, but i am still prone to the occasional despairing google spiral where i "research" some issue lying to myself that i am gathering important information but knowing deep inside i'm not planning to act on any of it at the moment and therefore really i am just feeding my own anxiety about it. partial credit.

don't push unless i have to: you know what? i think yeah. i mean, work in progress, but - yeah.

be proactive about looking for the stuff that makes me be alive: partial credit.

make more stuff, see more people, experience more art, have more fun: in order, maybe not strictly speaking "more" but between the amount i wrote and getting back into knitting i feel pretty happy about it; yes; probably?; definitely

fuck temperance: not as much as i maybe wanted to, but often enough to be glad when i did

i'm gonna come back on a full resolutions post later i think, maybe tonight maybe not (don't push unless i have to), but some current thoughts on this review:

keeping unedited; the 183 day goal (although i guess since we're in a leap year technically it should be 84, lol) in general; the daily habits of art, working out, drinking water, logging my little habits

i'm debating whether to keep planning my day as a habit or not. i feel like i've sort of internalized enough of a daily structure that some days it's helpful but other days i can just kind of jump into things and not feel like i missed something (today, for example, i've been toggling between work stuff and other goals, including sitting down to write this post, and it's felt pretty seamless)

internet: still thinking of a good way to phrase this. might just go with "make good internet choices" with the option to redefine or be more formal about "good internet choices" if i feel the need

making stuff: debating whether to keep unedited or now that i have gotten into knitting and definitely WILL be doing it pretty much anytime i'm watching something, do a teeny tiny daily writing resolution, like 100 words a day (or "100 words OR time spent doing actual research for something e.g. rewatching [redacted] for the sake of this newsletter i'm drafting")

room: i think i'm gonna keep this one, which lives in my app as "room maintenance," but mentally redefine it to EITHER re-setting my room to its zero position OR spending 20 minutes making progress towards that to disincentivize my current practice of leaving any messes i can't take care of in 20 minutes until i feel like i have a whole day to work on them

meditating, journaling, yoga, aka the self-care shit: i think i'm gonna swap meditating & yoga for mindfulness & mobility. so, like, one (1) yoga video, done while nothing else is playing and containing some degree of stretchiness, would get me a checkmark for both of those things, but i could also achieve both of them by doing, like, three minutes of silent deep breathing + stretching or foam rolling or one of those pilates butt workouts that always helps my back while watching TV or listening to a podcast or whatever. journaling... debating about this one but almost definitely planning to switch to digital journaling of some kind. the therapeutic value of handwritten journaling is real but it's clearly not something i'm up for at this period of my life lol. beyond that might keep it as journaling but just switch the mode, might split it up into reflection & recording, which are the two things i want out of journaling (the latter of which traditional journaling is actually terrible for for me because my handwriting is so bad i never reread my old entries) but could theoretically be accomplished by, like, a tarot pull + a social media post relating to the book or movie or whatever i'm reading. (i said i was gonna bring back blogging this year with my yearly personal tag and then i used it all of twice lol. BUT THIS YEAR I MEAN IT!!!)

walking: definitely gonna put this one in the app lol and also might switch to a monthly goal? i saw someone say that and it seemed crazy but then i was like, well it's true that if i get my period on a saturday and i haven't been going crazy with steps that week i'm basically done..... lol

it's been funny seeing posts all over the place encouraging "fun" new year's resolutions because those were the ones i failed the hardest at! lmao. clearly setting "do this by the end of the year" is not a productive framework for me personally. i will probably take some of my failed year-long resolutions from 2023 and make, like, a funsies list & a serious list, and then set a daily habit goal like "chip away a little at one fun project & one serious project"

the elephant in the room of my brain is, do i want to set some kind of numerical goal regarding Getting Out Of The House And/Or Spending Time With Human Persons? it feels intimating and scary and hard but also less so than it would have had i considered it before my friend moved out of the country. so....... maybe? idk.

similarly, debating if i do want to set some kind of goal regarding how much writing i accomplish, or if doing 100 words a day is enough since the hardest part of writing is absolutely just sitting down and fucking doing it. lol.

also considering a reading goal? that can but doesn't necessarily always count towards the art goal? hmmmm.

#isabel 2k24 #i mean it this time!

[dandylovesturtles]

*wheelchair annon rolls in*

Does Leo ever have successive days of being able to do things he hasn't for a while, of feeling better and more capable and more HIMSELF, only to have it all seemingly snatched away by the successive BAD days that follow like dark clouds, snatching away his autonomy and his thinking and his capability and his good mood like its all a big joke? How does he deal with it? (Overdoing it on good days very often leads to this, for me. It does get easier to deal with with time, but it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt.) (Sorry about the gloomy question. I was going to ask something else but I have been fighting a migraine all day... you can probably guess why lol.) *wheelchair annon rolls out*

Hi wheelchair anon! I'm so sorry to hear about your migraine :( I hope you're feeling better by the time you read this!

I've actually been thinking a lot about Leo's good days vs the bad ones since the last time you sent an ask so this is good timing haha. For this ask everything I'm going to talk about is after Leo has recovered (as much as he's going to) and gotten his powers back - obviously things are a lot more shaky earlier on in his journey.

Even on good days Leo can't really get around like he did before (he's not going to be jumping across rooftops or trying the 1440 off the halfpipe), but he can walk around pretty good for basic daily life stuff around the lair and even do a few of the physical things he used to, like shooting hoops or riding on his skateboard (though, he doesn't do tricks, and they make him wear a helmet and knee/elbow pads because they don't want to risk him breaking anything). I was talking on discord too about how Leo gets into gliding around after his brothers to film them doing tricks, then he and Mikey edit the footage with old 90s skateboard video aesthetics. And while he doesn't go on patrol with his brothers (monitoring them from his command center instead), he joins them on planned missions or can portal in to join them in a fight (though he still mostly runs support and doesn't often trade direct blows with anyone). It helps that Donnie can make temporary construct versions of virtually any of his mobility aids on the fly if Leo joins them on a mission and ends up needing something immediately that he didn't or couldn't bring with him (Leo complains about the purple every time, it's a running gag).

So yeah, on good days Leo usually feels pretty great, and much more like himself, and it definitely improves his mood every time! But that also means when he gets a good day, especially early on, he wants to go go go and do do do, enjoy all the things he doesn't have the energy for or is in too much pain to do on his bad days. And this definitely means he overdoes it, especially in the beginning. But even when he's careful, bad days still hit him and it sucks every time.

On Leo's bad days he usually sticks with his wheelchair even in the lair, sometimes using his walker instead. He also makes liberal use of his portals if he's really feeling drained. How much he can do depends on the day, and usually how much he did the day before.

On his very worst days, especially ones coming after a string of good days where he got to do a lot, Leo can get really depressed and not even want to get out of bed. Usually his family at least encourages him to get up, take a shower, brush his teeth, sit with them, do things other than lay in his bed because they know it will make him feel better, even if he doesn't really want to do it. But then there are days he doesn't even get that far. Days like that make him pretty miserable. It feels like his body betrayed him all over again, and is a reminder that the rest of his life is going to be up and down like this. And he hates how much help he needs on days like that, especially coming off days where he doesn't really need help much at all. He has to start asking for it again and it embarrasses him.

He'll learn to deal with it in more mentally healthy ways over time as he gains better coping mechanisms; he'll never be fully okay with it, like you said it will always hurt, but over time not all his bad days come with a complete mental health nosedive. He has days where he feels bad physically but is still able to enjoy the company of his family and friends or enjoy some Lou Jitsu movies or what have you. He's always annoyed that he can't fully predict how he's going to feel in advance, even as he gets older and more experienced, but over time he'll have fewer "fully depressed laying in bed" days (though still some of those, and some "physically too pained to move" days as well).

And of course no matter how he's feeling on any given day, his family is always sure to remind him that they love him no matter what. <3

Like I said, I hope you feel better when you read this, anon. Thanks as always for the ask! I hope I answered it alright.

#sidelined au #rottmnt

[slasher-male-wife]

Request for Lester sinclair

I had this idea of Lester waking up to go to his daily rounds of picking up roadkill, but the reader is practically clinging onto him, so he ends up just taking them with him!! Imagine laying across the passenger seat of Lester’s truck with your head on his lap, while he smiles and tells you stories while picking up his roadkill lol

No pressure I love your writing <333

Ok I love this idea and it honestly reminds me of this other one shot I read awhile ago, I'll link it if I can find it but this seems like a really cute idea. I haven't written much for Lester lately so I'm happy to do this for you.

Why not join me?

Warnings: Mentions of road kill but that's about it

It's six in the morning when Lester's alarm first goes off. He's quick to shut it off and try to sit up when he feels the weight of you clinging onto his arm. He smiles to himself as he tries to pull you off but you just grip on tighter. He shakes his head a little and lays back down, still trying to get you to let go. He sees you open your eyes slightly and smile at him. Knowing that you're awake now he doesn't feel as bad trying to talk to you. 

"Honey I've gotta get up now. I've got a lot of work to do." He says gently as he tries to pull off your arms but to no avail. 

"Just a few more minutes ok? The sun isn't even fully up yet." You reply. He laughs a little to himself. He knows how Bo gets about him not getting work done. He loves his brother but he really is a hardass sometimes.

"Well I know that but it's better to get started earlier ok? Now you've got to let go of my arm sweetpea," You shake your head and hold on tighter if that's even possible. He sighs and smiles to himself, "How about you come along with me today. I don't mind ya joining me." You think about it for a few seconds before letting go of his arm and rubbing your eyes. 

"I can do that." You smile and Lester smiles back. 

"Be ready to go in 20 minutes alright?" You nod and he gets out of bed. Lester gets ready and when he passes by his room again he sees you getting dressed too. Walking to the kitchen he makes a quick breakfast and pours himself some coffee. You soon join him. Eating quickly then making your way out to the truck. You get inside while Lester gets a few things ready. When he gets in the truck he can see you falling back asleep. He smiles to himself as he starts up the car and gets to driving. A few minutes into the car ride you lay down with the back of your head on his lap. You look up at him and he looks down at you for a moment with a smile. Although when he looks back up at the road he’s still smiling. 

“If you wanted to sleep some more, you could have just stayed at home honey. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable here, you know.” You yawn and nod, closing your eyes. 

“I know that. But I wanted to be with you today.” 

“I don’t know why someone as nice as you wants to spend their day around roadkill,” He moves a hand down and strokes your hair, “Or other people if we pick anyone up today for that matter.” You know what Lester means by that. When you two pick up people they’re never usually the nicest to you. 

“Well then let’s just hope we don’t pick up anyone this morning. I don’t get why you have to get up so early anyway. If Bo wants the roads to be clean so badly he should pick up the road kill himself.” Lester chuckles to himself and puts his hand back on the steering wheel. 

“It’s better to catch the animals earlier before the sun bakes them up and makes them smell like hell. It’s also important to catch as many people as we can. You know how Bo is about getting things done.” 

“Well I think he just needs to calm the fuck down every once and awhile. He doesn’t have to work every single day.” You two break out into a small, quiet laughter. 

“Bo is Bo and he’s not going to change anytime soon. It’s better to just try and get along with him anyway. I do owe him a lot. So doing this is the least that I could do.” You nod and open your eyes again. 

“I love you Lester.” He looks back down at you. 

“I love you too Y/n.” 

#lester sinclair #lester sinclair x reader #lester sinclair x you #lester sinclair x y/n #house of wax #slasher x y/n #slasher x reader #slasher fanfiction

[mdzs-owns-my-ass-i-guess]

Makeover

@cullen-blue23

🧟💄💅🏻Prompt from the one I missed last time; Wen Ning using make up to make himself lol more alive

Part of the Wen Ning fucks agenda because I have found my calling as a Wen Ning simp.

Enjoy!

Wen Ning stares through the windows of the little makeup shop, at the many bottles, vials and colorful boxes on the shelves lining up the cream-colored walls - and the way the shopkeeper applies the finishing touches of makeup to her client. The young woman looks... regal, almost, the colors around her eyes and the shine on her lips enhancing her already delicate features. She looks... beautiful. Alive.

Wen Ning remembers how he tried to paint his nails one day, a light, fleshy pink. It never lasted, but it made him feel...good. Human.

Oh, how he wishes he also was...

It feels ungrateful to think this way - he isn't... fully alive, but he's not dead either, and that's more than he could have ever dreamed of the moment he succumbed to exhaustion and died all those years ago.

He has a home now, and a family, and he's trying to make a name for himself other than the Ghost General. He can go wherever he wants, do whatever he wants, he even has money now! He can travel the world and meet all sorts of people, learn all sorts of things...

Still, there is so much he cannot do anymore. Precise movements are difficult, and sometimes he feels stuck in his body, every sensation muted.

He doesn't feel a lot of the things people do. Most sensations he gets to feel have to be very intense for him to get anything out of it. And it's... weird. That's the word Wen Ning has decided to settle on, even if that's not quite right.

(What a shame, that he doesn't get to feel with his body, but his soul is still so painfully human.)

Anyway, he does wish he was more... alive. Or at least look it. He isn't sure he still remembers what he used to look like...

"You can just come into the shop, you know?" the shopkeeper smiles at him from behind her counter. "I promise I don't bite! ...well, not without prior consent at least!"

If Wen Ning could, he'd be blushing. A bit ironic, considering the things he's been getting up to lately...

Still, he decides he might as well - he's been staring like a creep for too long not to purchase anything, and perhaps he can find something here that's going to make him feel less... different.

"So, what can I help you with today?"

"I'm looking for... makeup."

The lady laughs, and Wen Ning feels like blushing again.

"Well, you've sure found it! But what exactly are you hoping to achieve? What kind of look would you like?"

Wen Ning feels suddenly very self conscious, out of place in the shop, in the world.

"I want... to look more... alive."

The lady laughs, again. "You know, that's a very common request. And anyway, I see people that look dead-er than you on the daily! Go sit by the window and I'll try to work my magic!"

He does as instructed and struggles a little bit not to feel silly about it. What is he even doing here? The fearsome Ghost General is getting his makeup done.

The lady return from the back of the store carrying a few items. "I brought some foundation and some blush, I tried to go for the lighter colors because you don't seem like you had a dark skin tone."

"Oh, no, I used to burn very easily in the sun too..."

"This is the powder for your face, it's a bit thicker so you're going to need a special brush to apply it." The lady explains as she opens the cap to a round box and dips a thick brush into it. "The good thing about your skin is that it's even-toned, so the color should apply seamlessly, with a great finish."

She moves the brush expertly over Wen Ning's skin, focused. "You have very beautiful features, Wen-gongzi."

"Um, thank you..."

She moves the brush down his neck, applying the product in quick, precise strokes, as far as his robes show skin. "I'm not just saying that, my livelihood is beauty, I deal with it all the time, and so when I tell you that you're beautiful, I mean it."

Wen Ning doesn't know if the lady should be so close to him, but she seems not to notice the sudden few inches less of distance between them as she evens out the powder around his nose and cheeks. This feels... weirdly intimate.

"Say, can I do something for your eyes too?" she asks as she finally finishes livening up Wen Ning's complexion, adding blush powder onto his cheek bones.

"Something like what?"

"Eyeliner, maybe? I think it would make your eyes pop, give you that seductive gaze, know what I mean?"

He looks away, sheepish. "Not-not really..."

The makeup artist laughs, picking a small container off a nearby shelf. "I promise I won't overdo it, and if you don't like it, I'll wipe it off, okay?"

Wen Ning nods and closes his eyes, only to feel a tender swipe over each of his eyelids in turn. His makeup artist works very quickly. But so very closely to him.

"You can open your eyes now, I have a mirror you can look in."

And so, Wen Ning does. The reflection in the mirror is him - it is, but not really. His skin is glowing, his eyes appear painted on, lively, no longer faded, and just a bit less lifeless.

It's him if he was alive, if nothing went wrong, if-

"Everything okay?"

He blinks his thoughts and his phantom tears away. "Yeah, yeah, everything is... okay."

The makeup artist scrutinizes his features, curious. "Can I try some eyeshadow on you as well?"

"I guess...?"

The makeup artist already sweeps her eyes around her collection of displayed powders. "Are there any colors you don't like?"

"No red, please. Anything else is fine..."

She nods, and reaches for three little boxes. "I'm thinking some warm browns would compliment your look well, and I also just got this glittery powder that catches really prettily in the light, I think it will look amazing on you!"

Wen Ning flutters his eyelids closed. He's excited, almost - having seen how well the makeup artist has revived his complexion, he can only wonder what other things she'll surprise him with.

He feels the tender touches of brushes, the closeness with the other person - and he knows he's going to become a regular customer. He enjoys this, the feeling of being pampered, of being made beautiful.

"Not to toot my own horn," she says, a few minutes later, "...but I think I turned you into a bit of a god."

"Can I see?"

"Not yet, keep your eyes closed, I want to do something with your hair too."

"I-I really don't think I can afford-"

"No worries about that! Money isn't an issue." He feels her fingers comb through his hair carefully. "And anyway, money isn't the only way you can pay for something."

"I could help around... carry boxes or..."

"Wen-gongzi. That's not what I meant."

"Oh. Oh... But the makeup..."

She hands him the mirror as he opens his eyes, admiring the shine around his eyes, and the beautiful hairpiece atop his head.

"I use very high quality products, Wen-gongzi." the makeup artist smiles. "Nothing will run, no matter how strenuous the activity."

"Mm... Let's test it out?"

"Let me close up shop."

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #writing attempts #wn #i really enjoyed writing this one!

[tokidokitokyo]

2023年5月31日

TL;DR: Don't feel inadequate if your language learning journey is not the same as that of others. Your path is valid and you are doing great!

May seemed to just speed on by! And now it's time for my monthly Japanese study log. I think this month I felt a lot of shame for not having time to do the big goals that I have set for myself, and seeing people on langblr or studyblr accomplishing a lot of big goals makes me feel inadequate. It's important to remember that your language journey is your own, not someone else's, and there is no shame in going at your own pace. I try to focus on the things that I accomplish and not make the journeys that other people are on into some kind of impossible standard to hold myself to. Look at your own learning through the lens of how far you have come, and you will feel less like you are lacking.

つまり、自分なりに言語の勉強を続いてね。周りの人の道は自分とは違っても、自分でも成長していますね。これからも続きましょう！

5月はあっという間に終了です！今からは日本語の勉強日記を書こうと思います。今月は大きいな目標をなかなか進まなくて辛かったです。それに、タンブラーやインスタグラムの勉強垢をよく見てて、なんか自分が足りないって感じていました。日本語や言語の勉強は自分のやり方で自分のペースで進んだ方がいいと覚えた方がいいと思いますから、それを頑張って思い出そうとしています。他人の成長を見ながら自分の成長が足りないなと思うことはよくやりますが、それを辞めるように努力します。一か月や一年前の自分を見たら、今まですごく成長して���たと気づいたら、足りなくないとわかるかもしれません。

My 2023 Goals Progress

I laid out some broad goals for my Japanese study in my 2023 Japanese Language Goals post, so, as always, I start off my update with my progress towards these goals.

1. Read one page a day of 日本の歴史366 (にほんのれきし366) everyday in 2023.

How is it going? Good! I am finally getting back on track after setbacks from late work nights, illness, and vacation time. Since this is a page-a-day study book, I would have preferred to keep reading in order and to catch up on the days I missed reading, but that was physically impossible due to a lack of time in general. So I am continuing on even though I skipped some days because it's good reading practice and I still learn vocabulary and kanji daily.

2. Finish 日本語総まとめ N3 (にほんごそうまとめ N3) workbooks.

How is it going? Good! I have been doing one workbook daily entry per day for at least 2 days a week. There are 4 workbooks (Vocabulary, Kanji, Grammar, Listening) with 6 weeks and 6-7 daily entries per week. I am still on Week 5 out of 6 weeks, but I am progressing much more than I did last year (or the year before that lol).

I take my time with each lesson, reviewing the vocab/kanji/grammar points meticulously, so that I absorb the information rather than just rush through it. Sometimes I already know most of the vocab or kanji or grammar, but other days require more focus. I feel like I am retaining more information by doing it little-by-little, rather than just trying to get as much done as possible in one sitting. In May, I didn't review the lessons afterwards and throughout the week, so I might take some extra time to do that once I finish the series.

3. Review and learn the first 6 levels of the 常用漢字 (じょうようかんじ), specifically the 教育漢字 (きょういくかんじ) up to grade 6.

How is it going? Okay. I have been trying to focus on Joyo Kanji in my kanji reviews, so I went back to Grade 1 kanji to start my review. It helps me to figure out which ones I know well and where I am struggling. Goal: Review through at least grade 3 during the month of June.

4. Read at least one book every two months.

How is it going? Not great. I haven't had the time (nor the motivation) to pick back up the books I stopped in March, and I'm trying to be okay with that ^^; I would like to pick back up one book in June and try to finish it by July. One thing that I am continuing to read is the Gekkan Shojo Nozaki-kun manga series (in small chunks, usually before bed).

5. Improve my speaking and writing by finding a tutor.

How is it going? It could be better. I am going to set a deadline for finally finding a tutor. I just worry that if I find a tutor I won't be able to commit to a regular schedule and I'll just drop off like I have before. I keep thinking if I had more time to search for a tutor it'd be more permanent, but I think I am just procrastinating (shocked gasps from all). There's also a small worry about the financial commitment, but I am going to try to be frugal in other areas to allow for this luxury. Goal: I will find a tutor by June 30th (or at least start making regular appointments with tutors).

I've also added on to this goal that I would like to start writing sentences on HelloTalk so that I can get feedback without needing a tutor. This might help me to get motivated to improve instead of being terrified of making mistakes. Goal: Write one sentence a day on HelloTalk in June.

6. Study Japanese for at least 10 minutes every day.

How is it going? Good! Thank goodness I have been studying Japanese every day for so long that it's not even something I have to think about trying to fit into my schedule anymore.

May Study Log

This month my top study areas were Vocabulary, Kanji, and Speaking. I spent the least time studying Grammar and practicing Writing.

Study Methods I Used in May

Social Media

Not only did I use apps like renshuu.org (flash cards) and Easy Japanese (articles in Japanese) to study in May, I also used Instagram and started back up on HelloTalk. The idea is to interact with social media in a meaningful way by reading and writing in Japanese. I commented on other user's posts and reached out to some of them as well to start a conversation. The only drawback to this method is that you can get lost in endless doom scrolling if you don't focus on what you are there for (i.e. interaction) and just get lost in the algorithm.

Conversation

I speak Japanese daily (with my husband and son) and since my son is starting to speak in 3-4 word sentences and to copy our speech patterns, I am more mindful of what I am saying to him and how I am saying it (for example, using 大変 instead of やばい ^^;). However, when speaking with my husband it is easier to fall into a Japanglish routine with him, to drop formality and be lazy with sentence construction, and to speak in a more masculine way (because I tend to mimic the speech patterns of those I am speaking with). I have recently made a few Japanese mom friends with whom I can practice Japanese conversation. So I try to utilize our play dates by speaking both formal and casual Japanese, being mindful of my interactions, and trying to utilize new words or grammar points. Using Japanese is the best way to improve it, after all. The only drawback is that the conversation practices can be spaced few and far between, so spending time mindfully speaking at home is also important.

Reading

I have been doing far less reading than I was at the beginning of the year, but I still try to read something for just a few minutes a day to practice reading. Either an article, manga, or even just social media, just to keep myself practicing. Like conversation practice, the best way to improve my reading skills is to keep reading. The drawback is that if I try to read a book but then I have to put it down for a while, I forget what was happening or I lose my motivation to keep reading it because I feel like I am not making progress. If reading books is just not feasible due to a time crunch, I find it much better to read something shorter (articles or part of a manga), and I try not to be hard on myself for not reading a whole book when it seems like everyone else is reading tons of books every month.

Going Forward in June

Be continuous with 日本の歴史366

Focus on grades 1-3 of 教育漢字

Start regular italki tutor sessions

Write in Japanese on HelloTalk

Read one of the books I started earlier in the year by the end of July

I've been studying Japanese for a long time and I still feel inadequate a lot of the time. If you have studied Japanese for any amount of time, please be proud of yourself. You've done something that a lot of people only wish they could do. As always, I wish you much success in your language endeavors, and I hope we can continue on this journey together (no matter where our paths take us)!

長い間日本語を勉強しててもまだまだ足りないと思てます。今までちょっとでも長い間でも日本語を勉強している人に伝いたいことは、よく頑張ったね！日本語を勉強したくても勉強したことない人もたくさんいますので、勉強している人はすごいと思います。そして、自分なりにつづいてください。これからも、皆さん勉強の成功と成長を願っています。どんな道でも、一緒に勉強を続きましょう！

#日本語 #japanese #japanese language #japanese langblr #japanese studyblr #langblr #studyblr #日本語の日記 #japanese diary #japanese goals 2023 #japanese studyspo #tokidokitokyo #tdtphoto #my photo #japanese goals may 2023

[theflyingfeeling]

...😵

tl;dr: I want to open fic requests for December but I'm scared 🤧

~

ugh I always feel so self-conscious about talking about my fics because I feel like I'm always talking about (my) fics or (my) fic ideas, and the mean part of my brain is constantly trying to convince me that everyone is sick of that already and think I'm an attention seeker (which I swear I'm not 😭 having said that, I want to clarify that I'm not implying I think anyone who talks about their fics is an attention seeker! it's more about me expecting everyone to hate me specifically for constantly talking about mine 🤡)

in addition, I'm scared of everyone getting bored of all the Olli/Allu talk on my blog as well (apart from the lovely people who send me Olli/Allu related asks almost daily, I love you all so much 🥺💕) and that people think I'm incapable of talking about anything else (which is not the case, even if I do spend a worryingly lot of time thinking about these two nerds 😂)

oof, so now that I've gotten all that mandatory self-depracating talk out of the way: I really want to try and create an Olli/Allu prompt fic challenge for myself for December 😭

yes I knooooowwww there are already at least two fandom events for December and I could just participate in those and I'm sorry for being greedy and attention-seeky but...I kinda want to make my own 🥺 because I'd like to make it prompt-based, because I think that would be fun 🥺 a word-prompt maybe, or a situation-prompt, perhaps from a list of prompts I've compiled myself to make sure I can handle it, because I'm still traumatized by how horribly I failed with the super adorable Valentine's Day prompts last winter, because my brain just wasn't braining the way I needed it to brain 😭 for this reason I'm also considering just coming up with my own prompts, because I swear I could come up with 24 different fic ideas in one sitting with little to no problem, but on the other hand, getting requests is also super fun... 😩

also, if I was to open requests, I feel like I'd have to do more than Olli/Allu, because I understand it's not everyone's OTP (actually I don't but you do you lol (jk)), and I do want to write other pairings as well, but some pairings inspire me more than others, and recently I've felt like I've been inspired by Olli/Allu only, and maybe Joel/Joonas occasionally

another two-bladed issue is that while I feel like requests would perhaps make me more motivated to write, there's also a very likely chance they might start to feel like a chore, because when I'm not motivated, I simply can't force myself to write for the sake of fulfilling a request 🥲 that's just not how I work, no matter how much I wish I could. and I absolutely don't want to go through all the guilt and crying buckets for not fulfilling requests like I did earlier this year. I know I'm not quite as miserable now as I was then, so maybe I could bribe my brain to brain the way I need it to brain this time around, but the risk I'd be taking is just too terrifying 😭

so anyone who writes a ton of fics on request: you guys are my fucking heroes and I don't understand how you do it, can you spare a tip or two for a poor brainless fic-writer who's only able to write when the stars are in the exact right position? 🥺 and no, saying stuff like "you don't have to fulfil every request you get, that's completely alright and your readers will understand" will NOT do, because hellooooooooo of course I'll feel unnecessarily guilty about not fulfilling prompts even if there's no good reason for me to do so, don't you know me at all?! 😭😭😭😭😭 of course I know that my sweet, amazing, loving, world-deserving readers will be unreasonably understanding and not hold it against me if I did end up failing to fulfil their requests, but I'd still feel terrible about it, and there's nothing anyone could say or do about it I'm afraid 🤧

(I'd also be more than happy to collaborate with other content-creators for this but 1) there are already two fandom events for December, 2) I'm sort of only interested in writing Olli/Allu myself and making the whole challenge just about them would seem a tad circle-jerky and I'd hate to exclude anyone, and 3) not enough braincells to carry out a whole entire fandom event by myself)

so if anyone has any suggestions or ideas or tips regarding what kind of (perhaps) prompt-based fic challenge I could do without scaring myself shitless, I'd like to hear from you, totally alright if not though < feel free to ignore I promise I understand 🥺

#trigger warning: an unnecessary amount of self-deprecating talk lol ✌️ #i know i'm overdoing it i know i know i knooowwww but look. it's a form of self-defence okay :-: #if i hurt myself first no one else has to okay? and that way i have control over it #even though literally everyone i interact with on here has been nothing but sweet to me? 😭 #but sadly you never know who might be lurking and just waiting to break you to pieces #so self-deprecating talk is a way for me to show y'all that there's no need for you to do that #because none of you will ever think of me as lowly as i think of myself 💅 #this is unrelated to what's behind the cut btw lol #this is just something i wanted to say in case someone wonders why i keep constantly talking myself down 😂 #there's a reason why i'm like this and i'm working on it 🤧 #but yeah. i'd love to hear from literally anyone 😭 #fellow fic-writers and olli/allu enthusiast do interact 🥺👉👈

[castielsparkle]

toys guide for howrse.com (dailies edition)

HI this is going to be as brief as i possibly can and not super in depth BUT. here!! most of this is just like daily stuff u can do to get items and moneys (:

go to community > directories

go to horses > check "Show only special horses"

here you can interact with a few other players divines each day to receive items!

XANTHOS (5x a day)

when you stroke a xanthos, a horse in your breeding farm will receive 10 energy points!

EDIT: as mentioned by @corinne-eaglebridge-sso in the replies -

(text above: reply posted by corinne-eaglebridge-sso 8 hours ago, reply says "I would recommend petting Xanthos 5 times each day! Each has a low chance of you receiving a horn of plenty the next day!")

FROST (1x a day)

defrosting a frost has a chance of granting you a hypnos' blanket black market item! (when equipped to a horse this item allows it to be bedded without being registered in an equestrian center!) and on the first of each month a frost is granted to a player who defrosted her within the past month (:

ARCHIMEDES (1x a day)

archimedes will ask you a question, and if answered correctly you both make the horse more intelligent and win yourself an aging point! if you're not too savvy on horse trivia most of the answers are online somewhere to my understanding tho lol!

TOPAZ (5x a day)

you can congratulate up to 5 topaz a day, and they will net you 50 equus each! (250 equus total!)

this is still divine related but it isn't exactly one of the daily things here - if you rename one of your horses to "junior croesus" there is a chance it can turn into a croesus divine. similarly, there is a chance on the first of each month that a player who has logged in at least 20 days in the previous month can win the divine cascade! and for every player, as long as you have logged in the previous day, you will receive 100 equus in your reserve if you log on the next day :)

if you go to breeding farm > office > the safe haven

you can stroke one of three randomly selected horses residing in the safe haven, and sometimes they will give you an apple or some equus etc as a thank you :) i'm not sure how many times a day it is exactly but i know you can do it more than once lol, i just check every few hours and do it when it allows me to

if you go to achievements > daily objectives

there's a little place to win passes (premium currency) from daily objectives! you can get up to 30 a day - every now and then the requests are a bit nuts lol but often times theyre fairly easy! you can also swap out one objective a day for 20,000 equus. there's also a gauge that resets every week and if you fulfill ten of the objectives you're granted the horn of plenty black market item!

under trade > item exchange

there is a place you can swap out which black market items you have between other players up to three times a week! you can make offers and/or fulfill them:)

and on a final note for the quick item/money-grinding etc etc - i HIGHLY highly recommend doing their events when you can!! the minigames are usually pretty entertaining and the gifts are usually surprisingly generous for not being super paywalled!!

as of writing this they're doing two minigame events:

i only just started the blast: winter minigame a few hours and i already got two precious level companions, a fertility wand, 3*** victory ear bonnet + polo wraps, a lunge, a vintage apple, and 200 straw, and i still have three more chests waiting to unlock :D!! and even if you don't want to use the black market items you receive you can usually trade them in the item exchange so i try to get as many as i can regardless esp since theyre free!!

ok hehe that's about it off the top of my head for daily stuff sorry the post is so lengthy LMFAO but!! if you guys wanted tips about horse/donkey/pony/unicorn skill/gp maxing PLS feel free to ask that's my fav part of the game :") i unfortunately don't know jack shit about selling horses or running an equestrian center bc im usually on the consumer end lolol but!!!<3 ok yay have fun horsing around :3

edit: also!! not to plug hehe but if you want to add a friend on there my user is lesbitwisparkle (on international server) and i love to help out with giving congratulations and fulfilling daily objectives!!<3

#cas.txt #howrse toys #howrse #tutorial #info #daily #divines #interactive divines #equus #passes #items #long post #yay bedtime for me now...sorry i didnt proofread this its very rushed im sleepys

[moocha-muses]

If you want another poem prompt, I asked Partner for "a word you wouldn't normally associate with unsettling things" with no other context lmao. They simply returned with "spaghetti-o's" lol (if you're not doing any more feel free to ignore me)

No, I'm totally still taking prompts right up till bedtime on Halloween so if anyone else has some drop in my inbox! (I love getting mail.) Anyway you said something about Spagetti-Os?

don't know how long i've been down here there are no windows and my hands are tied up ninety percent of the day with zip ties and I have to wear mittens that i can't take off because otherwise i scratch at my self trying to claw off my tongue out my eyes trying to free whatever little red thing lives inside my flesh something small enough to crawl under the door and maybe i could grow a second skin again if i could just free the little red thing inside me shriveled and small and the light would hurt it but even the pain would be better than

once a day they let me use the bathroom which is just a bucket the help me squat over my hands still tied and mittened but once a day they cut the zip tie and they take the mittens off and they hand me a bowl of Spaghetti-Os the bowl is green and when you eat down to the bottom there is a cartoon frog with his face distorted into a horrifying grimace by the constant daily assault of the sharp-edge red plastic spoon i hate this frog i would spit on him every day but can't spare the saliva i used to like Spaghetti-Os my mom used to make them for me for us? she used to sing italian songs while she heated them not real italian just nonsense italian she didn't actually speak italian and sometimes she would cut up hot dogs or add extra cheese mom couldn't cook but she tried.

i hate Spaghetti-Os i don't know if i've been down here days or weeks or months but the cheap pasta sauce coats my tongue and the sticky glutinous feel of the pasta makes me want to vomit but when i don't eat myself with my little red spoon and my newly freed hands they scoop the little Os out of the bowl with their fingers and shove them Os and fingers into my mouth and then i really do vomit all over their hands

but maybe if I eat enough of them maybe i'll at least at last remember mom's face.

#hallowpoems #oo oo oo spaghetti-os

[thisisawonderfulusername]

a lifetime of firsts

first fallout

tasm! peter parker x reader

summary: you have a hard time after breaking up with peter.

warnings: angsty angst

word count: 1k

a/n: yall i am so so so so sorry that this has taken so long. not sure if anyone is even still interested in this, but i want to see it to the end just because of the ideas i have. i hope at least a few people want to read it to the end with me lol

after you kicked peter out of your room, you didn’t go back to sleep. you couldn’t. you couldn’t believe yourself. complaining to him that you lost sleep over constantly worrying for him and still not sleeping when that shouldn’t be your problem anymore. but it would never truly go away.

the excuse that you had to get up within a few hours anyways creeps through your mind as you stare up at your ceiling, forcing tears away.

in the nights following when you still couldn’t sleep, you make the excuse that your sleep schedule was messed up. staying up past midnight had become a daily thing, and soon it would change. soon you would be able to get through the night without staring up into nothing, pretending that the worry of his wellbeing was not still walking through your mind.

every once in a while- more than once in a while- you think you see him on his patrol. when you were walking home later than usual, a flash of red and blue would strike the corner of your eye. when you looked in its direction, nothing was there. 

you convince yourself you’ve been imagining it all. your mind was creating illusions, begging the thought of him to be the only thing it wrapped around, for it to never think about anything else in the world.

but you can’t keep on dwelling. you did this. you had a reason to do this. being with him took a toll on you that you couldn’t handle. continually thinking about him and only him was terrible for you.

gwen and mary jane noticed the change.

the very first day you came back to school, they saw that your eye bags were heavier than usual. other students in the halls either gave pitiful gazes or averted their eyes, able to see the emotional turmoil going on behind your eyes, even if they didn't know what actually happened.

you had taken to sitting in the back of the library during lunch. you would weave through all of the bookshelves to get to the wall and throw your bag down, using the wall to slide yourself down to the floor.

for weeks, it was like you were stuck in a nightmare. your parents asked where peter was, why they haven't seen him in a while. your eyes immediately flooded with tears as your mom looks at you in sudden concern, quickly pulling you into her arms and rocking you silently until you could calm down. they never asked about him after that.

but after a while, you felt better. the weights on your chest slowly lifted, and you returned to a normal lifestyle.

sleeping at night was the best part of it all. while you would occasionally have dreams of peter coming in through your window, or nightmares of him being hurt beyond repair, it was mostly okay.

gwen and mary jane were happier to see you sitting with them again and going out on small girl's nights when possible.

by the end of the year, it was almost like everything was behind you.

but it was never that easy with peter.

after you had walked the stage on your graduation day, previous students were milling about the field the small stage was set in to take pictures with family and friends. 

your parents took you to the side, snapping many different pictures. when they got distracted talking to your friends' parents, a hand grabbed at your wrist.

a small yelp escaped you as you were pulled to the side, almost dropping the cap that you now held in your hand.

when you looked at your abductor, you saw the face that plagued you.

"peter-"

"y/n, please listen to me." the pleading tone in his voice stops you from interrupting him, trying to show annoyance instead of the aching in your heart.

"i'm sorry," he starts, head shaking a little, "i know, you don't like it when i say that, it's not enough. but i really am."

you have to avert your gaze from his as you let out a shaky sigh. "peter, just tell me what you want."

"i want you back. i've missed you so, so much." he tries to keep your eyes on his, "i know everything i did was wrong. i know that i can't change what i did, but i want to be better. i want to be better just so you'll come back to me."

tears are threatening to spill from your eyes, and you know that what he's saying is true. ever since you were children, he had done everything you ever wanted him to do. he said he always would.

but you can't change your mind. not now, it's too late.

"peter, i'm leaving." you stare down at your feet, finally pulling your hand from his to play with your fingers.

"leaving-" his head shakes, "what do you mean you're leaving?"

you have to breathe in deeply to finally look into his eyes. "i'm leaving queens." you tell him, "my dream college accepted me."

of course he couldn't have known that. acceptance letters came after you had broken up, and it was almost as exciting as it would have been if he had been there to open it with you. especially since he was the reason for what you wanted to do in life. after all those nights helping him, you wanted to become a nurse.

"it's- it's not far, is it?" he asks, voice quieter now. 

your volume follows his as you look down at your feet. "i'm sorry, peter."

before he can say anything else, beg you any more to just stay with him, you walk away. a few tears manage to escape your eyes, but you quickly wipe them away as you make it back to your friends.

who knows what you would have said to him if you weren't planning on leaving. you didn't want to think about the possibilities of what could happen if you did stay, because then you might go back on your decision.

but you won't, because you won't allow yourself to think about him any longer. soon enough, you'll be out of the state and onto better things in life.

taglists

main: @horrorklaus @megasimpleplan4ever

marvel: none yet

peter parker: @elfvomit @spidergraph @rattdonovan @cupidoll @lup1nslOv4 

a lifetime of firsts: @kominnfyrirkattarnef @kiwi5335

#marvel x reader #tasm x reader #tasm!spiderman x reader #spiderman x reader #peter parker x reader #tasm!peter parker x reader

[narastories]

ramblings about writing longfic

So as you probably know by now I've been busy writing a chunky little fic over the summer. I wanted to look at the statistics of the process and ramble a little.

We got permission from Bob (@dresdenfilesbigbang) for a little vagueposting, although I don't think this post will even count because I'm not going to talk about the fic, I'm just going to use the process as an example to make a few points.

This time, I've used NaNoWriMo to track my word count, and that is the first thing. If you are motivated by tracking your word count, this is your reminder that besides being a yearly event, it is also a great tool that you can use all year around. Plus, you can create a project with any time length or word count, not just 50k in one month. I actually started off with 20k as the word count, since that was the minimum for the Big Bang, but ehm... well, it soon became clear that 20k is not going to be enough lol Point is, you can also update your goal as you go and it doesn't mess up anything in the slightest.

And I guess November is coming up if you want to do NaNo "proper". I did that once, and it was great to just see that I could. But honestly, 1600 words a day is way too much for me and I don't see the point. I would rather write 50k words over 3 months and push myself less. With the NaNo pace if you miss a day it really puts you behind, and that is just plain stressful.

Which brings me to my second point. If you look at this graph, your first thought might be "oh that looks so linear and disciplined" ...

(Well, okay your first thought may be "why the heck doesn't it start from zero?" I've written 5k before the start date, okay? It was a sort of "proof of concept" to see if this story was going to work out. And it's not like it was cheating, I've still written way too much lol)

And you know, you kind of would be right, I've neatly stayed above that dotted line, sure.

But then you look at my daily word count graph, and it looks like this:

(Again, ignore the anomaly of the first day please lol)

What I'm trying to say is this: if you write often enough, over a long enough period of time, it will look like consistent progress.

You don't have to write every day if it doesn't work for you. You really don't.

And I think it's nice to just pay attention to your process if you decide to start a bigger project because it will give you valuable info about how you work. And it will make writing the next longfic or bigger writing project easier.

My first multichapter work on AO3 is still unfinished at the 75%-85% point mark. I was posting it as I wrote and then I hit that point which now I know is critical for me. Now I know that when I'm 3/4 done with a fic of this size I usually want to go in and move things around, have a little crisis, and generally that I just go back and forth between writing and editing a lot. And because of that, posting as I write is a really bad idea for me.

So I guess the most crucial thing you can learn is how you write, and then everything will become a little easier.

Also, since this is a Big Bang fic with a deadline, it will drop all chapters at once which is something I haven't done before. Very exciting. (To me at least. To other people probably not, because of the tiny nature of the rarepair. But that never stopped me, has it?)

#nara's dresden phase #rambing about writing #dresden files big bang #hopefully a little motivating