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#Is sleep deprived
saphronethaleph · 14 days
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Literary Illusions
“It’s ironic,” Palpatine said, shaking his head. “He could save others from death, but not himself.”
Anakin frowned.
“And this is something the Jedi wouldn’t have told me?” he asked.
“Of course not,” Palpatine replied. “Is it a story you’ve heard?”
“Well, yes,” Anakin said. “Just now, from you. But not before then… and that surprises me, Chancellor.”
Palpatine shrugged. “I think you’ll find, Anakin, that the Jedi have not been telling you everything.”
“Maybe not, but… honestly, that sounds like exactly the kind of thing they’d tell me,” Anakin said.
Palpatine frowned.
“...what?” he asked.
“You know,” Anakin said. “Some Sith Lord works out how to bring people back to life from the dead, but his apprentice kills him and doesn’t bring him back to life because the Sith are inherently self destructive. If the two of them had worked together and been able to trust one another, they’d have been immortal.”
He shrugged. “It’s a good illustration of the inherently self destructive nature of the Dark Side, and it’s the dichotomy of how the Dark Side leads you to seek power in order to achieve goals that you then discard as irrelevant, because they’re not directly related to gaining power… hold on a second.”
Palpatine was a little distracted by trying to avoid mentally kicking himself, so it took him somewhat more than a second to notice what Anakin was doing.
“...Anakin?” he said. “Are you getting your comlink out?”
“Yeah,” Anakin replied. “Going to text Obi-Wan, ask him what he thinks of the story. Maybe there’s some kind of detail I missed which makes it less of a good illustration of the different worldviews and mindsets of the Jedi and the Sith.”
The Knight shrugged, his thumbs tapping away at his comlink. “He probably knows it, he knows all of the old stories.”
Palpatine blinked several times.
“...don’t,” he said, then very discreetly scrambled for a reason why. “It’s the middle of a performance. We don’t want to interrupt them.”
“Yeah, yeah, it’s on silent,” Anakin replied, with a shrug. “Or vibrate. Did I put it on vibrate… hang on, Chancellor, I’ll make sure it’s on silent…”
He turned the comlink over, then a loud bwing sounded.
“Oh, right, I forgot to set it to do not disturb mode,” Anakin said. “Hang on… uh… yeah, there we go, I forgot I added all these custom modes. I’ve been missing a lot of sleep lately.”
“Perhaps-” Palpatine began, but Anakin spoke over him.
“Huh,” he said. “He says he’s never heard of it either. Wants to know where I heard about it, it looks like he’s really interested… or maybe he’s trying to tell me about a death stick vendor, he’s terrible with multiglyphs and he thinks he’s good at them.”
Anakin glanced at the Chancellor, hoping for some solidarity, then visibly noticed that the Chancellor was several decades older than him and abandoned that.
“Is there a book I can get the whole story from?” he asked, instead. “Obi-Wan is better at nuances, like I say.”
“That is not the point,” Palpatine said, trying not to get visibly angry. “The point is that there is a way to save your loved ones!”
“Maybe there used to be, but not any more,” Anakin shrugged. “Like you said, this was a Sith thing and the Sith are all dead. Well, unless General Grievous is a Sith who knows how to heal people, but I doubt it given how much he got hurt, and I’m not sure Dooku knew it either… hey, if this story needs to be publicized more then maybe we could have them do a play of that instead?”
Palpatine blinked several times, as he tried to keep up with a Jedi with possible undiagnosed ADHD and found himself discovering a lack of talent for podracing.
“What?” he asked.
“You know, a play,” Anakin explained. “Dramatic betrayals, lost loved ones, it would probably do numbers. It’d be better than this, anyway.”
He waved his hand at the ongoing performance of Squid Lake.
“...what is wrong with Squid Lake?” Palpatine said, before reflecting that that had really been a stupid question for him to ask and that he should have asked a much better one.
“Well, uh,” Anakin began, looking a bit abashed. “Actually now I say it out loud this might be really culturally insensitive of me, but to me this play might as well be eighty minutes of people boasting about having enough water to swim in.”
“It’s a ballet,” Palpatine told him, now completely having lost control of the conversation.
“It’s just a less scary version of Sarlacc Pit,” Anakin went on. “Someone tried to drown me in a lake once, because they thought I couldn’t swim, but floating on sand is much harder, you barely have to do anything to escape a lake. You just float.”
Very belatedly, Anakin caught sight of Palpatine’s look of total befuddlement, and shrugged.
“Watto was a lot of things,” he said. “But he had culture.”
Palpatine’s hands twitched, as he very seriously considered the idea of abandoning literal centuries of Sith planning and decades of personal political advancement in favour of stabbing Anakin somewhere it would hurt.
It was extraordinarily tempting.
“...hold on,” Anakin said, slowly. “I guess… the thing I’d like most at the moment is for… and that means… this is literally one of those times when I could fall to the Dark Side because of it, like Darth Plagueis.”
He bestowed a grateful smile on Palpatine. “Thanks, Chancellor! I need to make a call, I guess the ballet won’t mind.”
Palpatine was so thrown by the swerve that he couldn’t think of a way to stop Anakin in the few seconds he had.
“Love?” Anakin said, into his commlink. “I… think we need to come clean, because otherwise I’ll fall to the Dark Side.”
Palpatine’s eye twitched.
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pocket-deer-boy · 1 year
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No, “cis gay men have visceral disgust reactions to the presence of vaginas that is rooted in mysoginy that reveals their grossly transphobic attitudes towards anyone they even suspect has a vagina” does not mean “omg op supports conversion therapy”. Read the fucking post again you dipshits. It’s not even about sex. You fucking moron. You are the exact asshole i’m talking about in this post. Just the presence of the word trans in the post makes you think it’s about sex? You have fucking brainworms.
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lesbian-hannibal · 3 months
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her: you better not be a bug in a rug when i get there
my snug ass:
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i hear your constantly sleep deprived tim drake. allow me to raise you one sleep deprived BUT prone to napping/passing out tim drake.
after a 72 hour mission, with no sleep, tim finishes up his report at the bat computer, stands up, takes three steps to the left, and curls into a ball on the floor and sleeps right there. Bruce finds him and moves him to somewhere more comfy.
alternatively, when he’s stressed and doesn’t want anyone to bother him, Tim finds the most inconvenient, out of sight place to nap so he can get back to work once he’s done. unfortunately sometimes he gets caught.
Jason: Why is Tim in the tea cabinet?
Dick: He’s tired, leave him be. I think this is the first time he’s slept in like two days.
———
Damian: Father, why is Drake currently unconscious in the cave under the medical gurneys?
Bruce: He likes it there.
———
i just like the idea that the family just rolls with it and accepts it as one of his many quirks. maybe even young justice gang gets in on it and is like oh yeah that’s tim for ya.
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h3xactinellida · 1 year
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discovered a dog called Sock today. short for Socrates. if you even care
update: here is the boy!
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fjordline · 1 month
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dogin8 · 1 year
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[ID: Two screenshots from Queering the Map, taken in Kottayam, Kerala. In the first screenshot there is a map pin that says “Surely, I can’t be the only one!”. In the second screenshot, a second map pin, very close to the first one, says, “No you are not.” The screenshots are from the Tiktok account @/ahecksis. End ID]
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sunlit-mess · 13 days
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doin' time
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maskednerd · 7 months
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buckleydiazmp4 · 2 months
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lou ferrigno jr really strolled up to set after five years, flew a helicopter to a capsized cruise ship in the middle of a storm, scrunched his nose multiple times, kissed oliver stark like he'd been training for it his whole career, improvised the chin grab, and i'm supposed to what. not love the guy??
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coffee-bat · 12 days
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bullying the (not) old man hours
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arty-cakes · 1 year
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u can click the crab as many times as u want. so far i havent found a limit
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tibbycaps · 3 months
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rendog: Woew
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mkarchin713 · 4 months
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DC x DP Prompt: Sticky Note
Poor sleep deprived Danny has been kidnapped by the Joker.
In the goons defense they thought only Tim Drake would fall for the old “hey kid you wanna have some Death Wish Coffee, just hop into our scary murder van” trick.
Joker was not exactly happy his goons grabbed the wrong black haired, blue eyed, sleep deprived college aged kid.
After shooting one of his goons Joker had calmed down enough to accept this was a lemons and lemonade situation.
He had the plexiglass tubes set up to fill with acid at a moments notice and his other goons were on their way with Red Robin. He could make whole “choose who dies, your bird or your lovers kid” ploy workout even if he used a random civilian. He just puts a blindfold and mouth gag on the civilian and look, instant Tim Drake.
Joker had to admit to Curly’s corpse that at least he kidnapped a Tim Drake lookalike who was so out of it already they didn’t even need to drug or threaten him. All the kid did was mumble something about fruitloops and fell asleep in the tube.
Now all Joker had to do was wait for Red Robin to get here.
Everything had been going so smoothly.
The brats were in the tubes, the live stream was up and running, and Batsy looked ready to tear his head off.
Unfortunately Harry just had to interrupt his monologue. Apparently there was a problem with “Tim Drakes” tube.
It was empty.
…. It was Empty!!?!
Well not entirely empty.
On the inside of the tube was a little green sticky note
I got bored so I left 😜
He got bored!?
Joker had bored him!?
Joker would not take this lying down.
He would find that kid and show him just how exciting he could be.
Right after Batman stopped punching him.
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wu-does-art · 3 months
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coming out as a "Will snores obnoxiously loud" and "Nico breaths so quietly you can barely tell hes alive" truther
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