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libralita · 2 years

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Cytonic

Author: Brandon Sanderson

Summary: Spensa’s life as a Defiant Defense Force pilot has been far from ordinary. She proved herself one of the best starfighters in the human enclave of Detritus and she saved her people from extermination at the hands of the Krell—the enigmatic alien species that has been holding them captive for decades. What’s more, she traveled light-years from home as an undercover spy to infiltrate the Superiority, where she learned of the galaxy beyond her small, desolate planet home.

Now, the Superiority—the governing galactic alliance bent on dominating all human life—has started a galaxy-wide war. And Spensa’s seen the weapons they plan to use to end it: the Delvers. Ancient, mysterious alien forces that can wipe out entire planetary systems in an instant. Spensa knows that no matter how many pilots the DDF has, there is no defeating this predator.

Except that Spensa is Cytonic. She faced down a Delver and saw something eerily familiar about it. And maybe, if she’s able to figure out what she is, she could be more than just another pilot in this unfolding war. She could save the galaxy.

The only way she can discover what she really is, though, is to leave behind all she knows and enter the Nowhere. A place from which few ever return.

To have courage means facing fear. And this mission is terrifying

Rating: 5/5

Review:

SPENSA NIGHTSHADE GET YOUR ASS BACK TO JORGEN OR SO HELP ME!

“You don’t care. You never care about me! You left me!”—Page 12

M-BOT SWEETIE I CARE ABOUT YOU NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Don’t worry, Cuna was about to be eat by a fuck of star-squid thing but they’re fine now. I really don’t know how anyone is going to explain the novella events to Spensa.

“Scud. I’d told Cobb that Cuna’s faction wanted peace. Winzik and Brade could use that to lure Cobb into talks—then double cross him.”—Page 14

The novellas are suffering.

“I didn’t get a good look at this last guy—he was furry and roughly the size of a refrigerator.”—Page 17

….Chewey?

“Then a scudding dinosaur came rampaging into camp—with a mustachioed human man riding on its back.”—Page 27

Okay Brandon you were having too much fun, time to take away your laptop for the day.

“‘Chet Starfinder! Interdimensional galactic explorer!’

‘That’s an awesome name!’ ‘Thanks! I made it up myself!’”—Page 29

Way. Too much. Fun. No fun allowed.

“Honestly, if I had to lay bets on me, M-Bot, or the slug surviving in this jungle alone, she’d top the list.”—Page 31

TRUE BUT DON’T ABANADON YOUR SLUG YOU MONSTER!

“‘We met one!’ M-Bot exclaimed. ‘Well, Spensa did. I was being murdered at the time. But I heard about it on the news! Sounded scary.’”—Page 32

I LAUGHED SO HARD.

“‘Technically,’ M-Bot said, hovering a few centimeters closer to him, ‘the word ‘sentient’ just means an ability to perceive and/or feel. Many people misuse this word. Instead, ‘sapience’ is the word for self-awareness—or intelligence like a human being. Which if you think about it is a human-centric definition. Those rascally humans and their linguistic biases.’”—Page 33

M-Bot, I have missed you so much, please reunite with the slugs.

Also Spensa getting mugged at the entrance reminds me of Elantris.

“Honor, valor.”—Page 46

*Squints*

“Cacti are so neat, they make me want to dance. Is that a good poem? Will you rate it on a scale of one to ten?”—Page 50

M-Bot is so cute I could punch something…no wonder Spensa is like this.

WAIT A MINUTE WAIT A MINUTE WAIT A MINUTE! CHET IS M-BOT’S OG PILOT.

I don’t like how suspicious Spensa is but please let this be reallllllllllll.

“It’s like finding out that your father hates you…”—Page 57

Brandon Sanderson, I will end you.

“‘What did you do to the Us?’ they’d been referring to the one I’d separated out.”—Page 65

So they’re like the cosmic bug people of Stormlight?

Can Spensa time travel?

“‘You can’t just hit people.’ ‘Didn’t you hit Jorgen basically all the time?’”—Page 88

Called out.

“That was when the Phone Company—a human organization—gave hyperdrives to the people of Earth.”—Page 96

I’m sorry but have we heard of this “Phone Company” before…I should have reread the books.

I wonder if the delver is creating Chet for Spensa. He’s like her father but also fills in the holes of who M-Bot’s pilot is. He’s bad with time, too.

The diones are privileged lmao.

“but I do have to say…boy took care of himself.”—Page 119

ASLDJFLKSJFLKJSDLKFJSLFKJSLKFJSLKDJFSLKJFL

“‘I can fix that,’ I said, reaching for the zipper.”—Page 121

LKSJDLKFJSLKDF SPENSA YOU WILL GIVE THIS GOOD BOY A HEART ATTACK AHHHHH!

He’ll report this Cobb alright so I think this means this takes place after Sunreach but before ReDawn. Good.

You’re mutants.

Wait we didn’t hear about Jorgen sending people to inspect the cave. Weird.

“But you know how my parents are. I love, Spensa, but…they’re partially responsible.”—Page 123

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

ASDKFHSKJDFKS HIS PARENTS ARE TRYING TO SET HIM UP DURING THIS TIME OMG.

THERE’S RED PANDA CREATURES AHHHHHH!!!

SPENSA IF YOU BURY YOUR PIN I SWEAR TO GOD I’LL—hey she didn’t…um…I can’t tell if this character development or I was wrong and this’ll come back to bite in her in the ass.

Hnnnnnnnnnnnng I don’t know what the right decision is.

These are very nice pirates.

NOOOOOOOOOOOO CHET I’M SORRY I DIDN’T TRUST YOUUUUUUUU!

“Well,Chet said. I will recuperate here, I think. You soldier forward! Yes.”—Page 149

STOP IT MY HEARTTTTTT! I think at this point even if Chet yeets Spensa into the endless void, I won’t be mad. I’M SO SORRYYYYY!

Whoever is cockblocking Spinface needs a slap.

I’ve met this rock for five minutes but I would die for Shiver.

“I’m trying not to be too offended by the AI scrubbing they tried to do. It’s basically the equivalent of feeding me poison. Fortunately, in this case that ‘feeding’ involved a comically large spoon a big spin that said ‘not poison.’”—Page 165

LMAO

Why doesn’t the superiority develop drugs to get people to be nonaggressive.

KAJSLDFJLKSDFFLSJDFL OH NO SPENSA IS FORGETTING THINGS AHHHHH!!!

“But in the data, I found unexpected truths. Many so-called lesser species weren’tsuffering the causality rates from intraspecies murder that we projected. They were known as aggressive species so they should have been killing one another at horrific rates. Yet…that just wasn’t the case.”—Pages 180-181

I mean we did live with each other for thousands of years without going extinct.

“Oh, how wonderful! I hate it!”—Page 190

Lol.

Nooooooooooooooooo.

Jason Write? Why does that name sound so familiar.

Y’know what’s funny about a lot of these earth references? I get like only have of them lol.

A contest? This really is Stormlite.

Peg is Cytonic?

“Projecting illusions into the minds of others—making oneself appear different, even feel different.”—Page 227

Interesting.

“But I’d never heard of a ‘trashy romance novel,’ as Maksim had named this one. It was written from the perspective of the Cambrian species, who had a lot of tentacles and stuff.”—Page 248

AHHH OH NO!!!

“Their courtship rituals were surprisingly similar to human ones—if way, way more sappy. Or maybe that was the genre.”—Page 248

Oh. I thought it would be…well…y’know…

“I didn’t really care about the plot; I was more intrigued by the book’s nature. It was just…so fluffy. The protagonist spent her time romancing three different guys, and her most urgent question was deciding which one to bring with her on vacation.”—Page 248

EXCUSE YOU!

Okay who’s Darkshadow.

“That was strange. I had yet to meet a nonhuman from the Superiority who used a lightlance the way we did in the DDF.”—Page 258

……….oh no.

OH MY GOD I THOUGHT IT WAS SPEN’S DAD BUT IT’S NOT IT’S HESHO AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

OH NO HE DOESN’T HAVE ANY OF HIS MEMORIES!!!

NO HESHO BABY!!!! SPENSA GO GET THEM!

Aksjhdfklskdjflksdflksjdflks THE LION KING AHHHHHHH

Interesting that stories are the things that stay longer. It’s the same for Chet.

“At least parts are familiar to me.”—Page 270

You either know Hamlet or you remember the CLASSIC 90S ANIMATED MOVIE AND NOT THAT ABONIMATION REMAKE. That was lost to time and no one cried.

Spensa why didn’t you just adjust your pin?

“The AI and I have been bonding,”—Page 292

ALSJDLKFJSLFKJSD GOOD!!!

“‘Like that time all the parents got together to watch their kids march when I was in school, and my mother was forced to admit to the other moms that I was the one who’d glued her homemade suit of wooden ‘power armor’ to her uniform.’ ‘I wish I’d known you back then,’ M-Bot said. ‘You should like such a capricious child.’ ‘Uh, yeah. Child.’ I ‘d been sixteen.”—Page 296

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!

“I know! Also: WHAT THE HELL, SPENSA?”—Page 312

Oh my god.

“I am you sworn companion.”—Page 313

AISJDLFJSLKDFJLKSDJ AHHHHHHHHH

Is this all just a metaphor for the fact we can’t live in stories and that we need to face reality. Rude.

LKAJSDKFJSLKDJFLSKDJFJLS OH SPENSA NIGHTSHADE HOW DARE YOU BURY THAT PIN.

Wait can all the slugs cameo like this or is just in the nowhere.

“You talk smarter now,”—Page 343

I choose to interrupt this as the slugs think we’re stupid outside the nowhere and not that Spensa has gotten better with her powers.

“Poop!”

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

THERE’S TONS OF TYPES OF SLUGS. AHHHHHH!

Man if this was the cosmere, I’d be screaming about a seon.

I KNEW IT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I KNEW THAT CHET WAS ACTUALLY JUST THE DELVER NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

“Don’t hate me, Spensa. Please don’t hate me! They have abandoned me. They want to destroy me. You’re…the only one…I have now.”—Page 351

Oh, it’s okay. I love him.

“‘And you wanted to come into the belt and help me, so you made a homunculus…’ He nodded eagerly. ‘Like from Gran-Gran’s story about the alchemist! Yes, that’s a good analogy. I made a Chet homunculus.”—Page 351

WAS THAT A FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST REFERENCE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Delvers came from AIs. Oh. We made the delvers. RIP.

“‘Just so you all know,’ Chet said from behind my seat. ‘I’m secretly a monster from outside space and time.’ ‘Ah yes,’ Hesho said. ‘Deep inside, aren’t we all monsters?’ ‘No. I’m pretty sure you’re not.’”—Page 358

Oh my god.

“Like courage, M-Bot. Fear create courage.”—Page 367

Is Spensa quoting Jorgen or did Brandon write the wrong favorite quote lol.

Alright M-Bot go become a delver and defeat them.

#cytonic #skyward #brandon sanderson

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whycantwebejustfriends · 2 years

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According to Psychology Today, friendships between men and between women have a noticeable difference. Female friendships tend to be more emotionally open and require more maintenance while male friendships tend to be based on activities and competition and be less intimate. The titular Skyward flight from Brandon Sanderson’s Skyward series is a mixed-gender ensemble and I will analyze their friendship dynamics.

For the most part, Skyward Flight’s subgroups follow the findings. Jorgen, Ned, and Arturo’s friendship is built on their piloting with Jorgen taking the position of the leade. Kimmalyn, FM, Hurl, and Spensa have a more sisterly kind of friendship. In chapter 26, the other three smuggled Spensa into their dorm room and provided her with food and companionship that she lacked.

What about cross-sex friendship? While the series does dabble in friends-to-lovers, it also prominently features cross-sex friendships. In Skyward, Rig is Spensa’s closest friend who helped her renovate her spaceship, M-Bot, and their relationship is more traditionally masculine. They never showed any jealousy when the other started pursuing a romantic relationship. Later, when FM said she thought Rig likes Spensa romantically, he responded with how terrifying she is in his eyes. The other prominent cross-sex friendship is between FM and Jorgen. While they have moments of tension due to their differing views, FM was there for Jorgen when he was dealing with the trauma of his parents’ deaths in the novella Evershore. This shows a more traditionally feminine kind of friendship. Like with the previous example, there was no implication of romantic feelings as both of them were in romantic relationships.

This shows the diversity of friendship in the series and how gender relation affects the dynamics. I wish for more YA works like this instead of ones overly focused on romantic relationships.

References:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/happiness-is-state-mind/202112/exploring-the-differences-between-male-and-female-friendships

#type: media analysis #media: skyward

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litandroses · 2 years

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ARC Review - Cytonic (Skyward #3) by Brandon Sanderson

Rating: 3★ out of 5

Release Date: Nov 23, 2021

Another one of my most anticipated releases! Very happy to have had the chance to review this e-arc! This picks up right where Starsight left off and does quite start with a bang. I dove into this without any predictions or expectations whatsoever and it ended up being...alright. This review will contain mild to no spoilers for the previous book/s.

Let’s start first with what I liked about this installment:

Cytonics - well, as the title suggests, we will get to know more about them here. This was a very interesting part of the book and also a factor to what made it fun.

New setting - if you’ve read Starsight then you know where Spensa is. Around 98% of this book is set there and nowhere else. Cytonic is quite like an exploration of it; if you want to see and know more of the cytoverse then this book I didn’t find this book short on that.

New characters - we meet another ragtag bunch. And they are unexpectedly endearing for their escapades. Their dynamics are not so different to that of Skyward Flight.

Action - similar to the previous books. Fast, and yes do expect more Spensa antics.

Twists - I didn’t see it coming, which may be a me thing. Nevertheless, it was cool.

Conclusion - it was fitting and satisfying and I’m still planning on reading book 4.

What I did not like:

Dialogue - some made me cringe? Although I had my issues with the dialogue since book 1. It has toned down gradually but still noticeable.

Plot - my biggest setback was probably this one. Compared to the others, this didn’t thrill me as much? It was...okay, just weaker, which brings me to my next points. I was also looking at Sanderson’s progress when he was writing this, he wrote this quickly, and it shows. I felt held at arm’s length.

Stakes - this was addressed in text actually but I still could not deny the fact that I was underwhelmed. Since I found the plot weak, and felt like there wasn’t much to follow, the stakes didn’t feel high in this book. I guess this could also explain why I didn’t experience the same buzz I did in the previous installments. Also, I thought things escalated too quickly. There wasn’t enough build up to feel excitement to certain plot points. They just happened and I went along with it.

Characters - I did mention the new characters were good, but a lot of them weren’t really fleshed out in my opinion; some side characters could use more depth. I didn’t feel at all close to them. Doesn’t mean they weren’t entertaining additions.

Overall, Cytonic was - for me - an installment with flaws I couldn’t ignore. Maybe I just expected more, considering how Starsight ended. This was still an action-packed and surprisingly fast read with (maybe a little) ridiculous characters; it deserves that credit at least.

A review copy was granted in exchange for an honest review. Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for the arc!

#cytonic #skyward #starsight #reviews #brandon sanderson #cytoverse #scifi

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starfast · 3 years

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Happy International Women’s Day

In honour of today being International Women’s Day, I thought I’d share some of my favourite books with awesome female leads. There’s obviously tons of books out there that fit that criteria, but here are 6 of my more underrated favourites presented in no particular order:

Onyx and Ivory by Mindee Arnett

Genre: YA Fantasy

Summary: Kate Brighton has been living as an outcast ever since her father tried to assassinate the king. She works for the Relay- the courier system where only the most skilled riders survive. Fortunately, Kate has the ability to manipulate the minds of animals, which helps her stay alive. Unfortunately, this type of magic is forbidden and if she’s caught she could be exiled or killed. It’s also this magic that causes her to come across the aftermath of a deadly dragon attack, the sole survivor of which is Prince Corwin, Kate’s first love. The two will have to put the past behind them, because unusual dragon attack is just the beginning.

Other highlights: This book had all the potential to be a very generic read but somehow managed to not be. Kate is not just a badass, but also has a more vulnerable side to her which makes her more relatable. This book also features an actually healthy romance and did I mention that the girl saves the boy in this one?

The Lady’s Guide to Petticoats and Piracy by Mackenzi Lee

Genre: YA Historical Fiction (but with a tiny bit of fantasy)

Summary: Felicity Montague just really wants to be a doctor, but since it’s the 1700′s it’s almost impossible for her to do so. However, when she learns that her childhood friend is getting married to one of her idols, Felicity uses it as an opportunity to try and make her dreams come true. She travels down to Germany with Sim, a mysterious girl who agrees to pay for Felicity’s way. But Sim has an agenda of her own, and once it’s uncovered Felicity becomes part of dangerous quest that will take her from Germany all the way down to Algeria.

Other highlights: This is technically a sequel to the Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue (which I also recommend). Just like it’s predecessor, The Lady’s Guide to Petticoats and Piracy also has a small but diverse cast (Sim is Muslim, and while it’s never outright stated in the book the author has confirmed that Felicity is asexual. Her brother and his boyfriend also make an appearance, the latter of which is biracial). This story also handles the “not like most girls” trope in the best way possible.

Skyward by Brandon Sanderson

Genre: YA Sci-fi

Summary: Spensa dreams of becoming a pilot, but because her father was labelled a coward, everyone is working against her. Even when she does make it into flight school, she has to work twice as hard because the people in charge don’t want her to end up like her father. But when Spensa comes across an ancient, sentient ship called M-Bot she convinces it to to help her defend her planet.

Other highlights: If you like a book with lots of action then I’d highly recommend this one! At 513 pages, it’s more on the longer side but it always feels like something is happening. The fight scenes in this book are amazing, and there’s some really cool world building as well. And honestly, Spensa is an awesome protagonist.

Sadie by Courtney Summers

Genre: YA Mystery/Thriller

Trigger Warnings: Abuse, pedophilia, murder, rape (let me know if I missed any)

Summary: After the death of her younger sister, Sadie sets out to find the man who killed her. She follows a trail of clues, hoping that it will lead to her sister’s murderer so that she can find justice. Meanwhile, West McCray, a radio personality hears about Sadie’s story. He starts a podcast that details his own journey to see if he can find out what happened to Sadie, who is now a missing person.

Other highlights: This book will make you so emotional! The bond between Sadie and her sister felt so real, and was so well written. Sadie also has a stutter, and while I can’t say whether it was accurately written or not I haven’t seen any complaints about it yet. It does hit on some pretty heavy topics though, but I felt like it was handled well.

The Girl Who Could Move Sh*t With Her Mind by Jackson Ford

Genre: Adult Sci-fi/ Mystery

Summary: Tegan Frost has the ability to move shit with her mind. As far as she knows, she’s the only one with this ability. So when a man winds up dead, murdered in a way that could only have been done by someone with telekinetic abilities all the suspicions fall on Tegan. Tegan knows she’s innocent, but she only has 24 hours to prove it.

Other Highlights: First of all, yes, that is the real title. And this book is kind of exactly what you would expect with a title like that. Tegan is the sassy and sarcastic protagonist that I’ve been waiting for. Even though she does have that edge she’s not a one dimensional character (she kind of reminds me of Deadpool or like a better version of Maximum Ride in that sense). It’s honestly a super fun read, and also criminally underrated.

Wolf by Wolf by Ryan Graudin

Genre: YA Alternate History/ Adventure

Summary: Set in an alternate history where the Germans won WW2 Yael is a former concentration camp victim, who as the result of some of the Nazi’s experiments can alter her appearance. Yael uses this ability to enter the Axis Tour; an annual motorcycle race that starts in Berlin and ends in Tokyo. Disguised as the previous year’s winner, Yael hopes to win the race so that she can win the private audience with Adolph Hitler and kill him.

Other Highlights: I mean the plot of this one is kind of the main selling point. It may sound a little bit out there but it is honestly one of the most unique books I’ve ever read. Ryan Graudin didn’t write this just so people can say that originality is dead.

#book recs #books #international womens day #onyx and ivory #the lady's guide to petticoats and piracy #skyward #sadie #the girl who could move shit with her mind #wolf by wolf #also I hope I did the summaries justice

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abitoflit · 3 years

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Starsight

“All her life, Spensa's dreamed of becoming a pilot and proving herself a hero like her father. She made it to the sky, but the truths she learned there were crushing. The rumors of her father's cowardice are true—he deserted his Flight during battle against the Krell. Worse, though, he turned against his team and attacked them. Spensa is sure that there's more to the story. And she's sure that whatever happened to her father that day could happen to her. When she made it outside the protective shell of her planet, she heard the stars—and what they revealed to her was terrifying. Everything Spensa has been taught about her world is a lie. Humankind has always celebrated heroes, but who defines what a hero is? Could humanity be the evil the galaxy needs to be protected from? Spensa is determined to find out, but each answer she discovers reveals a dozen new questions: about the war, about her enemies, and even, perhaps, about Spensa herself. But Spensa also discovered a few other things about herself—and she'll travel to the end of the galaxy to save humankind if she needs to,” (Sanderson).

I had mixed feelings about this novel. I thought the pace was pretty good and felt that it was more original than the first novel in the series. I also appreciated the introduction of some of the new characters featured in this novel, like Morriumur, who just wanted to prove himself. With that being said, I was not a fan of some of the other newer characters, like Brade, who was just freakin’ obnoxious. Every time she showed up on the page, I was like... oh you again? Lovely. Winzik was another character I didn’t care for, but that’s ok. He’s the antagonist—you’re not really supposed to like him. The other thing I appreciated about this novel was how Spensa’s perspective about things changed when she was given more and more information. Like Cuna’s facial expressions. It just goes to show that context matters as does all of the information you are able to obtain.

Rating: 3.4/5 stars

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erin-bo-berin · 4 years

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Darkest Storms & Brightest Rainbows (Part 3)

MASTERLIST

Part 1

Part 2

Hard Love (unofficial part 4)

The final part of the Cat fic is finally here! Hope I didn’t leave you in too much suspense. I don’t have much to say about this part other than it’s the longest of the three and there’s a nice mix of angst, smut and daddy Spence. Happy reading :)

Spencer Reid/Reader

Rating: M (some smut)

Word Count: 5,425

You hadn’t felt this queasy since your pregnancy.

There across the room stood Spencer, Cat’s face in his hands as he kissed her hungrily. His lips moved with hers with a lightning type of electricity between them.

You couldn’t believe your eyes.

“Spencer?” you croaked.

The two broke away quickly, his hands still on her face and he looked utterly horrified.

Horrified and guilty.

Cat untangled herself from your boyfriend and walked toward you, not so discreetly wiping the edge of her mouth.

“Oh good, you’re awake. Welcome to the party,” she purred.

“W-What’s going on?”

Your voice trembled, your gaze flickering back and forth between Spencer and Cat. Between being confused at the current situation, you were freaking out, worried about the whereabouts of Spensa. You desperately hoped she was okay.

It had been nearly a year since you last saw him in the flesh. Now his hair was longer and his face was shadowed with facial hair, more present than it usually was.

“Just to catch you up, sweetheart,” Cat sat next to you on the couch, “Spencie has been alive and well this whole time.”

You had to force yourself not to flinch, both at her close presence and at her words.

“Y/N, I can explain,” Spencer said, his eyes pleading for you to understand.

You couldn’t comprehend anything at the moment.

“Now, now. Don’t steal my story from me,” Cat tsked before turning back to you.

“Anyway, Spencer here thought he was being smart by faking his death. He thought I wouldn’t find him. Obviously he underestimated me. Did I also mention that the entire BAU knew he faked his death and didn’t have the decency to tell you?”

Your brows furrowed, your chest feeling tight. You looked over at Spencer.

“Is that true?”

But Spencer wasn’t looking at you. He was looking at Cat.

“Why are you doing this, Cat?”

“Well I thought it would be nice to have a little reunion. Besides while you and I were having some fun, I had my partner kidnap Y/N here so she could join us.”

“Where even are we?” you asked, peering around the dusty, rundown apartment.

There was a smashed TV in a corner, empty beer cans scattered by a wall and dust bunnies everywhere. It looked like it had been a long time since anyone had inhabited this space.

“Not important,” she brushed the question off, “But I thought us women should stick together, ya know?”

You looked at her blankly.

“Well I wanted to get three of us together to let you know that you could do better than Spencer over here.”

“And why do you say that?” you challenged her.

“Well, one,” she bit her lip, pretending to think, “He’s just like me. We deserve each other. Two, I hate to disillusion you that there’s nothing going on between Spencer and I. I just wouldn’t be able to live with myself. Three, I’m just looking out for you. You could find someone so much better for you.”

She reached out to push a lock of your hair behind your shoulders and you flinched away from her, anger growing in you.

“So this entire time, you’ve been with her?” you asked Spencer.

“No! No,” he shook his head emphatically, “I was in Moscow until she found me.”

“We’ve been having a great time,” Cat crossed her legs, smirking, “As you’ve seen. Did we even leave bed yesterday, Spencie?”

You pressed your lips together, refusing to let her see that she was getting to you.

“You kidnapped her just to make a point that I could do better, with you?”

“Not exactly. I also wanted to tell her just the kind of guy she’s dating. Oh, I’m sorry, thought she was dating.”

Her eyes were locked on Spencer’s, the challenge like flames of a fire in them.

“Did you know, that right before you woke up he told me that you’re not me?” Cat said, turning back to you, “That a part of him still thought about me all the time. I asked him to prove it.”

She made a face, a mock grimace, “Well you saw that part.”

Spencer now stood near you. She got up and squatted in front of you.

“I have to admit the sex is great,” she said nonchalantly, “But I’m sure you knew that. With the baby and all.”

You felt the blood freeze in your veins. How she knew about Spensa, you had no idea. Your fear for her spiked even more. If Cat even as much as touched a hair on your little girl’s head, you wouldn’t hesitate clawing her eyes out and ripping every hair from her head. The mama bear part of you was intense, just as intense as your love for your daughter.

“Baby?” Spencer looked confused, glancing between the two of you.

“I forgot, you didn’t know,” Cat laughed dryly, “My bad. Well she was pregnant with your baby. Such a shame that you miscarried and on the day daddy dearest decided to…”opt out” of being a father. Guess the excitement was just too much, huh?”

The look on Cat’s face was of a cruel pleasure. Spencer looked devastated as he tried to process what she’d just said.

“You...miscarried that day?” he whispered.

You weren’t about to make Cat aware of Spensa’s existence, so you made the lightning quick decision about what you had to do.

“Yeah. I did.”

•

“Emily!”

Penelope ran into the bullpen, concern written all over her face.

“What is it, Garcia?” Emily asked, instantly picking up on her frantic mood.

“I just got a call from your associates in Moscow that was keeping an eye on Reid. He’s gone missing.”

“You think Cat found him?”

“I don’t know, but it gets worse. JJ went to pick up Spensa to take her for a few hours like she’d promised Y/N, but she found Y/N gone and Spensa in her crib screaming.”

“She could have both of them.” Emily’s eyes widened, horrified.

“I’ll get the team!” Penelope was already running to locate all of them.

Cat Adams was going to be caught for good this time if they had to shoot her themselves.

•

“Just let her go Cat,” Spencer pleaded, “I’ll do anything you want.”

“Anything?”

A wicked grin crossed her face as she sat in an overstuffed chair across from the couch.

“You could always kiss me again. You know just to make sure she gets the picture.”

You had yet to face Spencer completely. Your turmoil was rolling inside you, too many emotions competing to be felt at once. You were angry that no one told you about Spencer and you’d spent a year mourning what you thought was his death. You were hurt, Cat’s words and Spencer’s actions still playing in your mind. You were scared, sad, confused, jealous, overwhelmed; it was like a bad combination of every emotion imaginable creating one big miserable cocktail.

“Y/N could just get up and leave,” Spencer argued.

“Yeah, I wouldn’t do that if I were her.”

The click of her gun got your attention, she had it pointed in your direction. She knew you had enough sense not to test her; she would pull that trigger if necessary.

“You think you’re so clever,” you sneered.

“Oh I don’t just think it sweetheart, I know it.”

“You account for every possible outcome and plan accordingly don’t you?”

“Wow, you sound just like Spencer,” she glanced over at him, “You sure know how to pick ‘em.”

“You obviously didn’t plan well enough,” you goaded.

“Y/N, what are you doing?” Spencer said.

He was on the couch, a good distance from you. He’d been there, head in his hands for a while before he’d started negotiating with her for your safety.

You ignored him and played the one card you knew you had.

“Can you actually trust your partner, Cat?”

“That’s irrelevant,” she deadpanned.

“Well I’d think it over if I were you.”

You sat back with a smirk of satisfaction because of the knowledge you had. Earlier hadn’t been the first time you had gained consciousness.

•

You’d waken in the backseat of a moving car. Your hands and legs were bound with zip ties. In the driver’s seat was a dark haired girl with a pixie cut.

“Hey!” you hollered, “What’s going on? Why are you doing this?!”

You thrashed and hit the back of her seat when she ignored you and turned the volume of the radio up.

“Shut up!” your captor hollered over the music.

You decided to be on your best behavior.

For now.

Spensa had been left in her crib asleep when this mysterious woman had kidnapped you. Tears slid down your face as you thought of her. All you wanted is to be home with her in your arms. You prayed she was safe and that someone would find her soon.

You waited until the radio became nothing but static, the channel lost, before you made your next move.

“You’re working for Cat Adams aren’t you?”

“I don’t have to tell you nothin’.”

The woman lit a cigarette while she drove, taking a long inhale of it. You watched her exhale the smoke then asked your next question.

“What’s your end of the deal?”

“Don’t know what you’re yapping about.”

“Come on. You don’t give a shit about me. What’s she promising you?”

She ignored you and continued to drive. You pleaded with her, you were desperate.

“Please, I have a daughter. She’s only 5 months old. Did she tell you that?”

“Shut up.”

“How do you even know Cat?”

You fell to the floor of the backseat as the car swerved suddenly and the tires squealed. You felt the car come to a stop.

The driver’s side door opened and closed. Then the back door was yanked open. You were grabbed by the back of your shirt and pulled upwards.

The pixie-cut woman jabbed her gun in your face.

“What’s to say I won’t shoot you right now?”

“Cause it’s not worth going to prison for killing a person you give zero fucks about,” you stated.

You might’ve been terrified, but your voice came out clear and even. She stared you down for a long moment until she spoke again.

“I don’t know her that well. She just came to me saying she needed a job done.”

“Did you get any payment?” you questioned.

“She promised ten grand.”

“Did you get the money?”

“She said I had to get the job done, then I’d see the money.”

“You know you’re probably never going to see that money. Either she’ll kill you or she’ll disappear without paying her dues.”

For the first time, you see her hesitate.

“What if she turns on you? She could lead the police, feds, the whole works right your way. She could blame it all on you. I’ve dealt with Cat before. She’s a dangerous woman.”

You knew you were probably grasping at straws by now, but you had no other choice. You had to do something.

“How do I know you’re not just bullshitting me?” The gun came closer to your face again.

“All I want to do is get back to my daughter. She already lost her father, I don’t want to make her an orphan.”

“What the hell do you expect me to do anyway?” she laughed cruelly, “It’s not exactly like I can walk in and say “hey I kidnapped this woman” you know.”

“Make an anonymous call. They won’t have to know your name. Just tell them where Cat is, where you’re taking me, something. You can call from a pay phone, they won’t be able to trace it back to you. No one will ever know you were involved in this.”

You can see her resolve wavering, the gun lowering just a bit. You tried not to get your hopes up.

“You can walk away from this,” you said evenly.

For a moment you think she’s actually going to let you go as leans forward to you, but she doesn’t. Instead, she swings her arm back, the gun coming in contact with your forehead.

You fall backwards in the seat, your head now pounding doubly as hard.

“I’ll do whatever the fuck I want, bitch.”

The car door slamming shut was the last thing you heard before you blacked out again.

But you hadn’t missed the look of panic in her eyes.

The next time you’d woke up, you were in the jaws of the psychopath.

•

“Your partner decided not to play by your rules anymore, Cat.”

Your voice was calm, but your nerves were frazzled. You were sick of dealing with Catherine Adams.

“I doubt that,” she smiled, “I have her loyalty.”

“Just because you’re a bitch doesn’t mean you get what you want, Cat.”

“Y/N,” Spencer warned.

“No, no. I’d love to hear what she has to say,” Cat leaned forward, interested.

“You literally had me kidnapped just to tell me that I’m not good enough for Spencer, that he should be yours which is ridiculous cause I doubt you have any feelings, much less love.”

“Love?” she snorted, “Please. I’m not delusional, besides love bores me. Do you think he’s capable of love?”

Spencer looked at her. You looked at him. He looked even worse than he had five minutes ago, if that was even possible. There was just something about Cat that drained him.

“If he was capable of love, he would’ve never put you in danger. Only reason you’re here at all is because of him.”

“If you’re this pleasant now, I’d hate to see what you’re like when someone double crosses you. Like say, your partner.” You ground your teeth in attempt to keep your cool.

“This isn’t her first rodeo, sweetie,” Cat looked over at Spencer, “You’ve got a fiesty one here.”

The glint in her eyes was a tell that she was enjoying this challenge. If it was a fight she wanted, a fight she was gonna get.

You stood up and walked toward her. Her eyes never left you as you approached her.

“I know for a fact that she’s gonna give up every bit of information she has on you and your plan.”

“She wouldn’t be an idiot. It would incriminate herself.”

“Not if she had something to,” you paused, shrugging nonchalantly, “Enlighten her.”

You had no idea if her partner had really contacted authorities and you hoped against hope that she had, but you weren’t about to show your doubts. With Cat it was all or nothing and if this would get you and Spencer out alive, this is what you would do.

“Huh. I like her, Spencie.”

“Cat, the gig is up. By now the BAU would have been alerted about my disappearance, Y/N’s too.”

“I’ll take my chances,” Cat said, sitting back as if she had all the time in the world.

“Did you know that Spencer is the only man to actually peak my interest? I’ve spent my whole adult life studying men and their lies, yet he intrigues me.”

“Obsessed is more like it,” you huffed.

“We have a...connection, you might say. By the way are you this bitter and bitchy because you lost his baby or is that just a personality trait of yours?”

She was goading you, you knew it. Even though she didn’t know about Spensa, it still felt like she was insulting her entire existence.

You’d noticed she’d completely taken her attention away from the gun, which was resting on the arm of the chair.

All the anger, all the resentment you had felt the day you thought Spencer died was bubbling to the surface. All the hurt you’d felt, the loss you’d experienced, the frustration, the pain that she caused made you snap. You’d had more than enough. You lunged for the gun just as fast as she did.

“Y/N, no!” Spencer yelled, jumping to his feet behind you.

Both of your hands were on the gun as you wrestled for it. It went off, a stray bullet going into the ceiling but even the gunshot was drowned out by the sound of the door caving in.

“FBI!”

Your hands dropped from the gun and you fell backwards onto the floor with a grunt. In your line of vision you saw Rossi, Emily and JJ rushing in, their guns on Cat.

With her two hostages too far out of reach and three guns pointed against her in comparison to the lone gun she had, the odds were not in her favor. You breathed a sigh of relief when the cuffs snapped closed around her wrists.

“Hey Spencie,” she smirked in his direction, “I may be going to prison, but that’s not going to ruin my mood. Wanna know why?”

“Why?” he bit out.

“Because you two are over.”

His jaw clenched, mouth pursed. The look of misery was written all over his face.

With one last knowing grin before she was escorted out, Cat’s last words were thrown in Spencer’s direction.

“I win.”

•

The tears started to fall the moment you exited the dirty, musty apartment. It was like you couldn’t stop crying.

You were sitting in the back of one of the FBI’s SUVs, tears still streaming down your face as you stared into space. Spencer was sitting in the backseat with you, on the opposite side and you could feel his eyes on you.

You were less than a foot away from each other yet you couldn’t feel more distant. You were relieved that he was alive, of course, but so much had transpired in the last hour that you weren’t sure what to feel anymore.

“You know, crying can actually be good for you. It can cause the release of oxytocin and endorphins, chemicals that can make us feel better,” he said gently.

“Spencer,” you sighed, feeling worn.

“Sorry.”

You didn’t mean to make him feel bad, but all you could feel were the torn shreds of your relationship at the moment, as if Cat’s words and actions had reduced it to nothing.

“Did you really sleep with her?” you whispered.

“No,” he answered firmly.

The kiss hung in the air between you two, though. Even knowing it was just Cat, stung.

“That kiss though.”

“Yeah,” he sighed, “You can’t fake things like that.”

You looked out the window, rain beginning to fall from the grayed sky. It was fitting for your mood.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N,” his tone was dejected, “Please don’t be mad.”

You shook your head.

“I’m not mad. It’s just...a lot to take in.”

He nodded, staying silent. There was nothing but the soft sound of rain hitting the window for a few minutes before he spoke again.

“Did you really have a miscarriage?” His voice was barely a whisper.

“No. I carried her to term.”

You looked over at him, his face changing when your words finally sunk in.

“I have a daughter?”

A small smile crossed your lips.

“I named her Spensa. Spensa Rose Reid.”

“You named her after me?”

You nodded.

“Can I meet her?” he asked, hesitantly.

“Of course.”

A smile peeked at the corners of his mouth. You glanced down at his hand that was resting on the middle seat. You reached out, touching your fingertips to his.

Maybe things would be okay after all.

•

After long hours of briefing, medical check ups and paperwork for Spencer, you both were finally back at the apartment. You hadn’t really had the chance to talk much to each other after the ride back to the BAU, much less see each other.

You were extremely grateful when JJ and Will had offered to take Spensa for the night and the next day, to give you both a chance to settle back in at home.

In a way, it was awkward being in the same space as him again, especially after all that had happened. It had been your space, then yours and Spensa’s for so long that you weren’t used to having him around.

“You know we’re gonna have to talk about this at some point,” Spencer pointed out gently as he sat down on his side of the bed.

The sight took your breath away for a moment. It had never occurred to you that you’d have the opportunity to see him on his side of the bed, ever again, but here he was.

You just weren’t ready for that conversation at the moment.

“I promised you I’d show you pictures of Spensa,” you said, getting your phone off the charger.

He didn’t say anything about your shift of the subject.

You sat down on the bed, pulling up pictures of your and Spencer’s daughter. You handed him your phone.

“Those are pictures from when she was born.”

He was speechless as he stared at the pictures, scrolling through them.

“She’s beautiful,” he breathed, in awe.

“She is,” she smiled.

“She’s so tiny.”

“Definitely not tiny anymore,” you chuckled.

“What’s this?”

You scoot closer, peering at your phone screen.

“Oh that’s a mini photoshoot I did in different onesies that the team bought her. They were so big on her then.”

Spencer kept looking through the pictures, watching her grow up via photos and videos, desperately trying to soak up all the moments he’d missed out on.

You weren’t quite sure of when it happened, but you’d settled next to him, your shoulder touching his. He was quietly scrolling through pictures when you spoke.

“I thought you were gone forever,” you whispered, your voice shaking.

He looked up at you, the pictures forgotten for the time being. You guessed there was no better time to talk about this than the present.

“I know. I knew the risks I had to take when I decided to fake my death.”

“Why didn’t anyone tell me? Especially the team. They saw me all the time, how bad things got, how depressed I was and they never said a thing.”

“I told them not to, Y/N,” Spencer said.

“Yeah, I got that. But it still wasn’t fair to me.”

He sighed, placing the phone on the nightstand before turning back to you. He contemplated his next words before he spoke.

“I knew it wouldn’t be. It was a lose lose situation. I would be away from you and you would be hurting, but I wanted to protect you. I needed to keep you safe,” he rubbed his jaw, agitated, “Although a lot of good that did considering what happened.”

“Spencer, you can’t blame yourself for things that Cat did. She’s the one that did this, not you.”

“I know, but she tricked me too. As much as I tried to outsmart her, she seemed to be one step ahead of me. She told me if I came with her, she wouldn’t hurt you, so I did.”

“But she kidnapped me anyway, just to mess with you.”

“Yeah,” he sighed.

“Was it true? What she said you told her? That there’s a part of you attracted to her or fascinated with her, or something?”

“Truthfully, yes,” his tongue glided over his lips, stalling his continuation.

“That kiss you saw...part of it was just giving into what I knew she wanted from me because I knew she would hurt you if motivated enough. Part of it was all the frustration and hurt and anger she’s caused me. It just kinda came all out, in that kiss.”

“Yeah, it was...something,” you chuckled slightly.

“I’m sure I could do better with you.”

You grinned marginally.

“What about your wound? You actually got shot, didn’t you?”

“Yeah,” he said, lifting his shirt to show the now faded scar from surgery, “That part is true. I had to have surgery and it was touch and go there for a while. Hotch decided then I was to fake my death until Cat was caught and I agreed once I had woken from surgery.”

You turned the information over in your mind. You wanted to be mad at him, mad at the team, but you knew that wouldn’t be fair to them. They had a job to do, Spencer had tried to do his best in a bad situation. You were still hurt, but you weren’t angry.

“I understand you did what you had to do. Faking your death, Cat and all. I can’t be upset with you just for trying to keep me safe.”

Another silence fell, but a more comfortable one now that you’d cleared the air.

You slid down on the bed, making yourself more comfortable against your pillow, assuming he was going to return to looking at pictures.

“Y/N?”

“Yeah?” you looked up at him.

“You know that no matter what convoluted thing Cat and I shared that she doesn’t hold a candle to you, right?”

“I know. It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not. I hurt you, I can tell. I don’t want her to win. I don’t want her to break us up.”

“She won’t. I wouldn’t dare let her have the satisfaction,” you said.

“I don’t love her, I love you,” his fingers traced your cheek.

“And I love you,” you whispered.

He leaned down, his lips meeting yours. It had been so long since you last felt his touch that it was like the first time all over again. Your hand slid across his jaw to the back of his neck, pulling him closer.

He slid down the bed with you, moving over you as his lips moved against yours. It was as if the two of you were rediscovering each over anew. Just the way he kissed you made you feel like the most loved person in the world.

His hands slid under your shirt, resting on your stomach and pushed up your shirt, breaking the kiss only to pull the shirt over your head. He looked down at you, pursing his lips in contemplation as his eyes drank you up.

“What?” you whispered.

“Nothing. I just love you, is all.”

You smiled, pulling his face back to yours. You lay there a while, just simply kissing each other, the kisses varying in length and pressure. From slow and sweet kisses to longer and more heated kisses, you both were making up for lost time.

Between kisses more items of clothing hit the floor until you were both left completely skin to skin attempting to get as close to one another as you could.

His lips grazed your collarbones, a hand sliding up your side before his gaze returned to yours, eyes locked with yours as he entered you.

Your soft moan mingled with his own. It had been so long since you’d been in each other’s arms that the sensation was a blissful relief.

Your chest was flush with his and you felt his skin glide against yours as his whole body moved with his thrusts. Your hands ran over his back, pulling him closer to you.

His lips pressed against yours, a deep groan rumbling in his throat. He broke the kiss, his mouth hovering close over yours as he moved within you. He was so close you could feel his breath across your face, his breathing becoming erratic.

“Fuck, honey,” he groaned and your stomach churned in desire at the sentiment.

He dropped his head into the crook of your neck and your hand gripped the back of his hair, your hips beginning to have a mind of their own, working for that sweet release. The bed shook from your passion as your bodies moved together quickly.

You were incapable of words, repeated moans escaping your lips. His lips kissed your neck, nipping just hard enough to add to your pleasure.

“Spence, Spencer,” you whimpered, your toes beginning to curl.

Your fingers twisted in his hair, tugging hard enough to make him grunt in your ear. You had to smirk to yourself, you still knew what drove him wild.

His grip on your hips tightened, moving them to a different position resulting in your feeling of him deeper inside you. You couldn’t even care about being embarrassed at the loud moan he elicited from you.

Spencer’s hand came up to caress your head then landed on the bed sheet next to your face, gripping the sheet in his grasp. His grunts and groans of your name rang in your ears as the pressure in your stomach built.

Inadvertently your legs pulled him nearer as if he couldn’t get any closer to you than he already was. You could feel his own muscles tense, your knowledge of his body and his tells coming back to you as if it had never been such a lengthy period.

Your teeth scrape against your bottom lip, his fingertips finding your clit, knowing exactly when and how to bring you to careening over the edge. You do just that, your nails scraping down his back with a vengeance. The long break from intimacy has made this high even better than you remembered, his name falling from your lips repeatedly.

You faintly register his growl of your name as he comes apart, his jaw slackened with his groans, eyes closed blissfully. Your hand is still tangled in his hair and you slide it down the side of his neck as you watch him recover.

He’s breathing hard, as are you and his forehead rests against yours for a moment before he pulls away, looking at you lovingly. He leans down to kiss you softly and briefly, breaking away to push a strand of your hair that had fallen in your eyes, aside.

“I love you,” you whispered, captured by his gaze, smiling at his return of your sentiment.

“Welcome home to me.”

•

You were still naked when you heard the doorbell ring the next morning. That was what in fact woke the two of you.

“Shit,” you jumped out of bed, grabbing your clothes, “That’s probably JJ.”

He tossed you one of his shirts as you pulled on a pair of lacy underwear that you managed to find on the floor. Whether it was the correct pair or not didn’t matter, at least it was clothes. You pulled on the shirt afterwards.

“Go ahead and get dressed, I’ll go get the door.”

You rushed towards the front door before the bell could ring a third time. Opening it, you found JJ holding Spensa’s carrier, diaper bag and then a smirk. Her eyes roamed over your attire.

“Fun night?”

“Okay, not in front of the child,” you chuckled, taking her carrier and bag from her, “Thank you so much for watching her.”

“It’s no problem, really. It’s nice to have another girl around the house sometimes.”

You smiled, unbuckling Spensa from her carrier. She was already beginning to get fussy. She loved to be on the go and hated to be restrained.

“Do you want to come in?”

“No, it’s okay. I gotta run, besides I figured you’d like some family time,” she smiled, “She’s gonna love him, by the way.”

“She better, she’s too much like him.”

JJ laughed and gave Spensa a kiss on the head, telling you and her goodbye then left, leaving you and Spensa alone in the living room.

Spensa babbled, sucking on a finger.

“I have someone for you to meet, baby girl.”

More babbling ensued as you walked back to the bedroom. Spencer was still somehow trying to get dressed.

“Have you seen my pants?” he mumbled, before turning around and freezing.

“Spencer, I want you to meet your daughter, Spensa.”

Spensa was already fussing, trying to reach for him. He took her, a smile brightening his face.

“She sure doesn’t seem to be shy.”

“Oh no. She’ll let practically anyone hold her. She loves people,” you said.

“I can’t believe it,” he smiled, looking down at her.

Her fingers were back in her mouth and she was looking around the room contently.

“Look at those little curls,” he chuckled, running a hand over her head and then kissing it, “She’s perfect.”

“That she is,” she smiled, leaning against the dresser, watching the two of them.

“You’re totally going to be a daddy’s girl aren’t you?”

As if she had understood what he said, she yawned, laying her head on his shoulder.

“I love you so much, my little Spensa. I’m never leaving you or your mommy ever again.”

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libertyreads · 3 years

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Books that are worth the hype-

Here are just five books that I think are completely worth the hype. We hear a lot about these books on BookTube and across the internet and they are so worth it.

1. Skyward by Brandon Sanderson-- This is a YA Sci-Fi novel about a girl named Spensa who wants to be a pilot one day, but faces problems getting into the school thanks to her father’s past. I rated this one a full 5 stars upon finishing it the first time. I don’t know if that rating would stand upon a reread and looking back on it now. But I doubt I could ever rate this lower than a 4.5 stars. I loved the characters, the world building, and the twist at the end was so shocking. It’s also got some sassy AI and if there’s one thing we know about me it’s that I love some sassy AI.

2. Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo-- A YA/New Adult Fantasy novel, this was my first foray into the Grishaverse (whoops) and I loved every second of it. This is the first book in the second series set in this world. Six outcasts come together to complete an impossible heist. This includes a gritty world, morally grey characters, and a found family. I rated this one a full 5 stars upon finishing it the first time and I think that rating stands upon rereads. I want to be Inej Ghafa when I grow up. Or at least have the self confidence and wit of Nina Zenik.

3. The Raven Boys by Maggie Stiefvater-- When I tell you that this first book had me up past my bed time I mean that I was marathoning this book at 2 a.m. with red eyes, blurry vision, and a damaged heart. This book spoke to the weird little girl inside of me who needed something like this growing up. And that’s not even the point of the story--the regular family and the found family in this completely stole my heart. And it’s so hard to explain the premise of this book to someone who’s never heard of it before. Blue is the only non-psychic in a family of psychics and she just wants to fit in, but when she sees something one night that she shouldn’t she has to have answers. I rated this 4 stars the first time I read it but I think knowing what I know now that I would have to change it upon a reread. It’s so good.

4. Vicious by V.E. Schwab-- In this Adult Sci-Fi/Fantasy novel, Victor and Eli are two college roommates who work together to figure out how ExtraOrdinaries happen and maybe they experiment on each other along the way. And ten years after the fact one is hailed as the local hero while the other has been behind bars. What has caused this rift in their relationship? And who’s really the good guy here? I love Schwab’s exploration of morally grey characters and the questionable lines between right and wrong. I rated this 5 stars when I read it originally and I still stick with that rating after several rereads. This is one of my favorite books of all time.

5. The City of Brass by S.A. Chakraborty-- An Adult desert, high Fantasy novel about a woman named Nahri. She’s a con woman in 18th century Cairo who doesn’t believe in magic. But when she accidentally summons a warrior djinn there are suddenly a lot of questions that need to be answered. She’s forced to enter a magical world she never believed was real. I rated this one 4.25 stars when I originally finished the novel. I’m not sure how that would stand up now, but since I’ve completed the series and I know how everything ends I feel like I’d have to bump up the rating at least a quarter star. There were so many things placed in book one that make a huge difference in the rest of the books. The plotting, the planning, was just so good.

#books #bookish #booklr #bookstagram #book #bookstack #bookshelf #book mantle #skyward #Brandon sanderson #six of crows #leigh bardugo #the raven boys #the raven cycle #Maggie stiefvater #vicious #v.e. schwab #the city of brass #s.a. chakraborty

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brechtian · 3 years

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one of my favorite exchanges in skyward is when spensa and jorgen are hugging and she's like why is it always about RULES and LOGIC with you what about FEELINGS and then Jorgen says "I do feel things, Spin. Like right now I feel incredibly awkward." ICON BEHAVIOR!!!!! he is so funny one of the best characters ever written maby

#and then they argue about who hugged who first and jorgen was like IT WAS SELF DEFENSE U WERE ATTACKING ME and spensa goes I WAS LIGHTLY #POKING YOU #they are so funny. dysfunctional space teens my beloved <3 #jorgen weight #skyward #spensa nightshade

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shadowthrone-ammanas · 4 years

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‘Life’ as a Ghost Chapter One: Bow

The continuation of ‘Ghost Kid’ is here at last! I don’t know how often I’m gonna update it but it’s a thing now. As stated before, it’s gonna be one shots so don’t expect a longform story like the first one was.

I refer to Hat Kid as 'Spensa' here because obviously that's what Bow is gonna think of her as and call her. My headcanon name for Bow is Beauregard which shortens to Bow as a nickname and thus why she's still Bow.

It took a long time but Bow had finally done it! She’d found Spensa’s ship! It was on a planet that she wasn’t even supposed to have stopped at. Bow had only found it because it was vaguely on the way back home from where Spensa was supposed to have been. A lot of it had to do with just being lucky though because it was on the planet itself, making it harder to detect. But even better than that luck was that according to the readings on Bow’s ship, it was intact, meaning Spensa was alive! That was honestly a miracle; Bow had insisted on being the one do this particular mission thinking it’d end with her learning how Spensa had died. Not a pleasant thing to find but most people wouldn’t have bothered to investigate the cause of the death and Bow had wanted to know for closure. Finding out that Spensa was actually most likely alive was so much better.

Now Bow was supposed to contact Homebase to relay the coordinates before going to investigate but… something was fishy here. If Spensa’s ship was intact, that could only mean she’d landed it there, right? Why would she have done that? And more importantly why hadn’t she returned home since she obviously could? There was something going on here and it might be something Homebase would disapprove of and thus it was best not to contact them until Bow knew the exact situation.

She settled her ship into the planet’s orbit – if need be, she’d edit the log of its coordinates later to make it look like she’d never been here. She then pulled out her phone and with a few quick taps was beaming down to the planet’s surface as close to Spensa’s ship as her own ship could land her.

She landed in a dead forest in a clearing in front of a large hollow tree. It was dark and rather spooky looking, the exact kind of place Spensa would love so it was honestly no surprise that her ship was here. Bow would be lying if she said she didn’t enjoy it too though; they were both weird like that.

Tapping her bow pointed her towards Spensa’s ship; off and to the left. Too excited to finally see her friend again to bother with walking, she took off at steady jog towards it.

There had to be a reason Spensa hadn’t returned, but what was it? She hadn’t turned traitor, had she? … If so, then by finding her, Bow would have to as well. … That honestly didn’t bother her much, she cared more about having a space ship she could fly than being loyal to the people who gave it to her. Of course, if she and/or Spensa got caught they’d be brought back home and executed. What were the chances of that happening though? … Considering the fact that Bow had found Spensa’s ship it definitely wasn’t zero percent.

Well, if need be Bow could return home, say she’d found Spensa’s ship damaged beyond repair and then mysteriously vanish to come back and hang with Spensa again. If she had turned traitor of course. Bow shouldn’t be planning on what to do next until…

A creepy giggle that sent a shiver down Bow’s spine came from right behind her. She slid to an abrupt halt, turning to see nothing there. That was odd. She wasn’t afraid though… not much anyway. Something was watching her from the shadows, she could feel it. … If only she’d thought to bring a weapon with her.

“Hello?” she said because maybe whatever it was wasn’t…

“Oh my gosh Bow, it is you!”

She snapped around just in time to see a ghost rushing towards her. Before she could react, it was hugging her. … Well at least it was friendly but what was going on? And… Bow’s translator wasn’t even on right now, how was a being from another planet speaking her language?

“When I decided to stay, I thought I’d never see you again!” The ghost said as she pulled back at last to smile at Bow. “But here you are!” … Wait a minute…

“Spensa?” Bow almost couldn’t believe her eyes but… the ghost looked an awful lot like Spensa and her voice was very similar too, only difference really as that it was a tad echoey. The only thing that was off was that she was a ghost.

“Yep, it’s me!” She smiled wide.

“But… you’re a ghost? You died?!” That wasn’t what Bow wanted to find. “This is a joke, right?” It was a bit extreme but it was certainly the kind of joke Spensa would pull if she had the means to make herself look and sound like a ghost.

“Uh…” Spensa grimaced and looked away. “No, it’s not a joke. I’m dead and a ghost. It’s… really not that bad though.” She smiled again as she looked back up at Bow. “Well, at first it was, but the more power I gain, the more not bad it becomes. And like… now that you’re here everything’s good again!”

Well… becoming a ghost was better than not becoming one. Even if ghosts weren’t looked at fondly by most people, Bow had never fully understood why. It was still Spensa, just… as a ghost now. That was better than finding her dead and not around anymore. … It still meant she died though.

“Can I ask how… it happened?” That wasn’t rude, was it? Probably was but Bow wanted to know.

“Someone who I used think was a friend caused my ship to crash while we were both on it. She survived which is still a load of bullshit but whatever I guess, lucky her.” She frowned, crossing her arms before shaking it off. “But I managed to repair the ship and being a ghost really ain’t that bad once you get used to it so I don’t really care anymore.”

“Well… I’m happy to see you again.” Bow hugged her, trying her best not to be bothered by how cold and… odd she felt now. She was still Spensa though and therefore she was still Bow’s friend and that’s all that mattered.

“You’re so warm.” Spensa squeezed her tight. “Why are you here though?” she asked as they withdrew.

“I’m looking for you. I insisted on being the one to search for your ship to either salvage it or to bring you back home. I assume you’re not going back though, are you?” Because if she’d wanted to she would’ve, ghost or not.

“Nope, this is my home now. It’s wonderful, isn’t it?” It was certainly very spooky and dark, the exact kind of things she liked. And now that she was a ghost, she fit right in. “But speaking of that, you have to meet my mentor, he’s the best. … He’s also maybe kind of my dad? I don’t really know though because I’ve never had a dad before so I don’t really know what they’re like. So, don’t tell him I told you he’s my dad, it’s like an awkward subject for him… me too honestly. But let’s go meet him!” She grabbed Bow’s arm and started dragging her back the way she’d come.

It wasn’t long before they reached the clearing with the big tree again. Spensa paused to check inside, apparently not finding what she was looking for because she grabbed Bow’s wrist again and started down a different path. Not far down it Spensa pulled her off the path to walk alongside it instead.

“There’s a trap there,” she explained. “It’s one of mine though so tripping it won’t summon…” she said a word in a language Bow didn’t understand, presumably her mentor’s name. “I’ll show you it later though.”

With her free hand, Bow pulled out her magic translator and put it in her ear. The last thing she wanted was to meet Spensa’s mentor and not be able to understand him. He had to be quite something if Spensa looked up to him. … What that something might be was hard to guess though because Spensa wasn’t known for being the most level person around.

Eventually they reached another clearing that seemed to be a village; there were little house made from trees by a little river. Little fellows that looked kind of like stuffed toys with glowing faces milled about the place. There was also a large ghost in the center speaking to a small group of them.

“Snatcher!” Spensa called, speaking a different language now as increased their pace towards him.

The big ghost looked at her and then at Bow. “Uh… kiddo, have you forgotten how soul contracts are supposed to work? You’re supposed to make her sign the piece of paper that gives you her soul.”

“This is Bow,” Spensa replied. “She was my only friend back at the school and now she’s here because she came looking for me. And Bow, this is Snatcher. He’s my mentor. He taught me how to do all kinds of spooky ghost stuff and is helping with my magic as I get more powerful and stuff. He also helped me with all sorts of other things too.”

Unfortunately, the translator didn’t let Bow speak the language, just understand it, so all she could do for now was smile and wave in greeting. Like Spensa she was good with languages though so she should be able to pick it up fairly quickly assuming she stayed long enough.

“Great,” Snatcher said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “Just what I need, another feral alien child running around my forest.”

“Don’t worry, she’s not as bad as me. Not that that’s saying a whole lot but she’s cool and nice.”

Bow nodded, giving Snatcher another smile and a thumbs up. Since he was Spensa’s friend and mentor, she’d play nice and would endeavor to get along.

“If he ever says anything mean to you, ignore it, he doesn’t really mean it most of the time.” Spensa said, speaking to Bow now.

Snatcher scoffed. “Don’t spread lies kid, I’ve meant every mean thing I’ve ever said to you.”

“Yeah, uh-huh, totally.” Spensa nodded sarcastically, clearly not believing it. “Can I show her around the forest now? Show her the sights and introduce her to the Subconites and all that?” She linked her ghostly arm through Bow’s, pulling her closer.

“If it’ll get you leave me alone for a while, sure, go have fun.” Snatcher dismissed them with a wave noodle-like arm before vanishing all at once.

“This’ll be fun,” Spensa said, reverting back to their home language as she started guiding Bow elsewhere. “Subcon Forest is like the best place on the planet. Though I’ll have to introduce to my other friends too. Oh, and you’ll love the Metro. I’d tell you why but I want it to be surprise. I’m like… not allowed to go there anymore because there’s a powerful gang there and I kind of angered their leader but it’s whatever, I’m a ghost now so I can do what I want.”

“Sounds like something you’d do.” Bow was almost a little jealous, Spensa had been going on adventures and making friends while Bow had been increasingly worried that she was dead. Well, actually she was dead, but not gone and that’s what mattered most.

#My writing #ahit #A Hat In Time #ghost kid fic #Ghost kid #Dadcher #snatcher & hat kid #Bow & hat Kid

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anemonereadssometimes · 4 years

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Top 15 characters from books I’ve read in 2020

Yes I know it’s only been six months. I’ve read 27 books, which is way more than last year, love me some having graduated college and actually have free time. This list was Not Easy, the order changes by the day, and this year was a lot of rereads but I saw this idea and I thought it looked fun so here I am. Without further ado:

1. Kaladin (The Stormlight Archive by Brandon Sanderson)

I love my too honorable, depressed, protective boy. He tries so hard all the time, and he attaches and loves everyone. He tries to give everything and more of himself to save and it might not be healthy but I relate so hard lmao. I just love him so much. He’s grumpy as hell and takes too much responsibility but goddamit he cares.

2. Jesper Fahey (Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo)

I just.... I love Jesper. His charisma shines through the pages. Jesper is the type of person I want to be, full of life, and sharing that with other people.

3. Inej Ghafa (Six of Crows)

Strongest person ever, I want to be her or I want to marry her, I’m not sure which. Every word she says is thought through, and she is deliberate, and reflective, and physically, emotionally, and mentally strong.

4. Fire (Fire by Kristin Cashore)

My favorite character from a book I’ve loved for ten years. I reread this book probably once a year, and my love for Fire only grows. She’s immensely reflective, strong, and soft at the same time. She gets to be both. I also love the strong woman who is kind and compassionate and loves children, because loving and treating children well and being strong/ having power are not mutually exclusive. She’s just wonderful, and I never get sick of watching her grow confident in herself and grow outside of her shadows, becoming something reforged. Also she’s beautiful.

5. Wylan Van Eck (Six of Crows)

Hhhhhhh okay I am wylan. I know this. I know that’s why I like him. He’s the parts of me I like lmao. He’s smart, confident when in the right situation, and just honestly the sweetest. When it comes to it, he’s brave, but he feels like everyone around him is leagues above him. Also he loves Jesper which like, yeah dude I feel that.

6. Sophie Hatter (Howl’s Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones)

Sophie is mean as hell and I appreciate that honestly. She’s no nonsense and clever and wonderful. Hella strong character, I love every conversation she has with people. She also has the tendency to fall into repetitive thought patterns which is a mood.

7. Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch (Carry On by Rainbow Rowell)

Ah Baz. Loved this boy for years. We’ve run across another book I reread a lot. Baz is dramatic as hell, has a mean streak, but fiercely protects those in his circle. I am not him, and I sure as hell wouldn’t agree with him on everything, but I respect him as a mage and as a person. Also he makes me cry.

8. Sylphrena (The Stormlight Archive)

God I love Syl. I can’t believe she’s this low on the list tbh but she’s the cheerful counterpart to Kaladin. She’s an honorspren, so not a person exactly, but more of an idea, which is hella cool I wish I was an idea. She’s badass and she cares so much about Kaladin, and about doing what’s right by people. She’s kind and I got to watch her grow her consciousness and intelligence. One minute she is having a philosophical discussion with Kal and the next she’s pretending to be a rock, or sticking people’s shoelaces together. That’s a duality I can relate to and respect.

9. M-bot (Skyward & Starsight by Brandon Sanderson)

M-bot is not a person either, he’s an AI and I love him. M-bot made me cry my eyes out, actually I think every character on this list so far has made me cry except Sophie, and that’s because Howl’s Moving Castle is kind of a light book and I love that. Anyway M-bot is a sarcastic little thing and I love him. His lines are the funniest, but he also cares a lot, and is also runs a spaceship so like that’s awesome.

10. Spensa (Skyward & Starsight)

Spensa is probably my favorite character that I spend the whole book yelling at. Jk, not the whole book, but she does frustrate me. She’s so impulsive, but man she tries so hard and feels so much and I’m a sucker for characters that care. She’s a good egg, go read Skyward.

11. Eric R Bittle (Check, Please by Ngozi Ukazu)

Another character that’s made me cry! This one multiple times! I grew up alongside Bitty in a way, going through college at the same time he did, and weirdly coming out around the time he did as well. Feels like he’s been there with me, and I got to watch him mature and beat his own demons. I’m so proud of him and I squeal every time I see him. He’s such a stinking sweetheart.

12. Simon Snow (Carry On)

Ah yes, another idiot whom I love. But he cares so much!!! He loves with his whole self, he doesn’t do anything by halves. He throws himself headlong into everything, and he may be reckless and stupid sometimes but I love him.

13. Howl (Howl’s Moving Castle)

I listened to the audiobook version of this book, and I honestly think that cemented my love of Howl. The Howl voice the voice actor does is marvelous, and many of his lines had me cackling in public. He’s brash and grumpy and selfish but I love him anyway. Helps that he’s funny as hell.

14. Nina (Six of Crows)

Ninaaaaaaaaaa another character to get mad at, since she has a tendency to do stupid things, but she always does them for the right reasons. She’s badass, and she gives love to her friends freely. She also doesn’t know how to shut up and I love that. Also have a mentioned she’s badass? And beautiful???

15. Calcifer (Howl’s Moving Castle)

Fuckin’ hilarious. 10/10 jokes, the voice actor’s voice was also very good for calcifer. He loves to pretend he doesn’t car but he does. Also in the second and third books he’s hella badass which is cool.

Honorable mentions in no order:

Kimmalyn (Skyward)-sweetest bby, I love her

Shallan (The Stormlight Archive)- haven’t liked her every step of the way but she’s such and interesting character holy crap

Dalinar (The Stormlight Archive)- army general, has killed lots of ppl :/ but he’s so invested in change and doing good, and he pushes himself so hard. Love the way Brandon Sanderson writes everyone morally gray. Good stuff.

Penny (Carry On)- brash as hell, damn smart, will kick your ass, does not have time for you, kinda unlikeable, wait I’m describing book hermoine wait could it be that I loved hermoine in my formative years and now I love the carry on version of her? Mmm not surprising.

#the stormlight archive #carry on #six of crows #the graceling trilogy #howls moving castle #skyward #check please #my post #kaladin stormblessed #jesper fahey #inej ghafa #lady fire #wylan van eck #sophie hatter #baz #simon snow #calcifer

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