#and no i'm not just saying that because i just ate a bowl of 2-minute noodles | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

anadiasmount · 3 months

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BFF so morning fluff with jude (waking up and stuff) nd you are in his hoodie wearing nothing underneath ... then you're in the kitchen making breakfast and he's behind you, running his hands inside his hoodie your wearing to find out you're still wearing nothing underneath and it turns him on (slight smut)

BESTIEEEE!!! "nothing but shorts skirts around the house" ** 🤭🤭 // here's my treat to you!! like always hope you enjoy! 🤍

the rain hitting and tapping the windows woke you abruptly, squinting your eyes and looking around the room, quiet and dark, beside the 6ft man who slept sound asleep next to you. jude had his arm wrapped around your naked body, his chin on top of your head snoring slightly. brows drew in as his lips pursed.

jude's hand twitched pulling you closer to him as if nothing happened. recalls of last night played in your head as you remembered how the long night was filled with shared love and lust. kisses, moans, reassurance, and giggles of 'i love you's". he never failed to make you feel special and wanted.

you scrolled on your phone for a bit, replying to messages and emails, and going through your shopping cart to see what needed to be bought and or returned. it had been a long and hectic 2 weeks for jude, playing football and training, so sleep was exactly what he deserved and needed.

you gently moved his secure arm from you, hearing him groan but then turned over to tuck himself on the other side, not once waking up. jude was a heavy sleeper, and when he slept, he slept. the thunderstorm from outside wouldn't even wake him, let alone if it got worse throughout the day.

after brushing your teeth, you slip into a black hoodie he wore once to a basketball game, no undergarments underneath since the hoodie fits you loose, and is bigger than a dress. it went almost touching your knees, and the sleeves had to be rolled up. you grabbed your phone and headed to the kitchen to brew some coffee.

you yawned, stretching your arms and legs, feeling the cold floor beneath you, as you turned on the kitchen lights. you checked the security cameras to ensure nothing had happened over the night, and made sure every door was locked because you never know. you attempted to blend the coffee quietly, quickly putting it into the filter and began to brew it.

it was still early, and jude had the day off with you. he promised he'd workout and then spend the rest of the day with you, either cuddled up or doing last-minute shopping, although the last time that felt impossible with everyone recognizing him. you laugh at the memory, pulling out the carton of eggs, some veggies to add, and fruit to cut up.

you quietly played music in the background, dicing the fruit first, taking two small bowls out for each of you. you hummed quietly, making sure you wouldn't cut yourself as you cut into the jalapenos, cherry tomatoes, and onions to add to the eggs. jude walked down still asleep and groggy, scratching the side of his head as he approached you.

he wore black plaided pj pants walking shirtless. "hi babe, good morning," you greeted leaning up to meet his kiss in a quick peck. jude groaned feeling you pull away and return back to what you were doing. "coffee just finished, and now I'm making some eggs," you say, feeling jude come behind you and tug you into his chest once again.

"my favorite way," jude cheers, looking at all the veggies spread out in the pan sizzling. "gosh I'm so tired, my legs are killing me from the game yesterday," jude complained, not letting go of you once even when he reached to get the two mugs.

he grabbed some scooby doo cookies, dipped them into the warm drink, and ate them. the two of you conversed about yesterday, and plans for today, agreeing if that the storm got worse you'd stay in and recover here.

you squirmed around your space, giggling, as you felt jude teasingly running up his larger hands on your thighs and sides. his fingertips drawing shapes and lines as he ran them under his hoodie, just to find out you wore nothing underneath. "jude?" you asked, feeling as he went quiet and stopped his movements.

"hmm?"

"are you okay?"

"you're not wearing anything under my hoodie, darling," jude points out, his left hand going all the way up to slightly grab your boob, fingering rolling around the bead feeling it get hard. "i know i just didn't want to waste clothes again since I was-s-s going to s-s-shower after," you stutter gulping the small moan you wanted to let out.

you felt soft and silky, and smelled like vanilla and cherry as jude placed wet kisses all over the nape of your neck, biting and sucking at times. "you're distracting me jude," you whined trying to pull away, "what did you expect? you're wearing my hoodie with nothing underneath angel..."

he grabbed a strawberry, placing it between his lips as you watched his every move. he turned you around, grabbing your face gently with one hand as the other one gripped your ass cheek. his eyes went hooded, observing the way your breathing rapidly changed as he traced the red juice of the sweet fruit all along your top and bottom lip.

jude took a bite placing the half un-eaten piece into your mouth, chewing it softly as he sucked his finger to wipe any extra juice. you looked so torn, licking your lips pondering whether to continue with breakfast or let him take you right then and there. his skin trailed with goosebumps as you dragged your hand all the way up to his throat, gliding it behind his neck.

"you're distracting me," you raised your brow playing with fire growing bold and confident. "and you're making me crazy," jude smugged as he leaned down once again to kiss your jaw, pulse point, and now corners of your lips. "you always drive crazy, whether it's you sitting down and doing work or you wearing my clothes in our home. tell me what did you expect?"

"nothing..." you joke watching him pull back with a "don't play with me" look, "but i do expect you to let me finish breakfast?" you said sweetly, an innocent smile playing at your lips. jude hears you giggling and pleads to put you down as he picks you up and takes you to the couch.

his fingers traced from your sides to between your legs, feeling you already wet as he stroked his fingers around your entrance and throbbing clit. he kissed you profusely, still being able to taste the strawberries on your lips and tongue as they danced together. he gently inserted his fingers into you, your back arching at the sensation. jude smirked, kissing your chin, before sinking his didgets deeper.

"i think i can have my breakfast and workout right now... all at the same time..."

#jude bellingham #judey thoughts 5️⃣#jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham imagine #jude bellingham blurb #jude bellingham one shot #football fanfic #footballer #football x reader #football one shot #football x you

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liaarxse · 10 months

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can you do which tr characters would do this with y/n and how it would go??

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8JmRPXM/

This is a mess...

Characters: Keisuke Baji, Nahoya Kawata, Manjiro Sano

Warnings: None

—Keisuke Baji

He's down.

Ya'll tried baking a cake, with him only talking. His arms were behind his back where you were, and your arms were showing, as if it was his.

You had to stand on a small stool to be able to do this

The house was a mess

Cats were even stepped on

R.i.p

Baji instantly dropped the act and fell to his knees, babying the poor kitty

It's your fault Y/N

You're guilty

How dare you

After like.. 30 minutes, he let go

For his, yours, and the cats sake

It was barely able to breathe from his grasp

You continued on the trend

Then a fucking egg flew and hit Baji Jr. Number 28 in the head

Then a fucking Baji flew and grasped cat number 61 in his arms

See what I did there?

Cat? 61?

61?

I'm sorry (not)

In the end, like half of the egg shells got in the mix and you choked on one.

R.i.p Y/N

#deadfamilymoments 🍷🍷😍😜😜😜😜🍷😜🍷😜🍷🥱🍷

—Nahoya Kawata

He just KNEW

When you entered his room with a playful smile, he just got up, stretched and—

"Bring it on!"

God

Souya just gathered his shit and moved out

There was probably going to be a reported murder scene in there, and he doesn't want to be a suspect

Why?

Oh, because Nahoya probably saw someone he didn't like through the window and chased them with a knife

Anyway let's say it didn't happen

He wasn't taking it seriously AT ALL

You had to recharge your phone 3 times because its battery died

And his phone is so broken, your emo friend can't compete

You managed to season the noodles but when you tried to feed him

Ah... shit

You literally couldn't see from his big ass hair and were struggling behind him

He was laughing so hard that instead of biting the fork, he bit your arm

"YOU BUSTED ASS FUCK—"

He didn't care

He just took the bowl and went to eat it in the other room

You wanted revenge

You snuck out of the window, and busted from the front door, screaming

Guess who's noodles went flying in the air

And it landed on his hair

Let's say it was an interesting night

The next morning everything was a-okay don't worry.

—Manjiro Sano

The amount of food y'all went through was INSANE

Like, is you rich or smth 🤨

Manjiro was RAVENOUS

Fucker would've ate you if there was nothing else

😘

But that's a story for another time

You were cuddled up next to him, your head laying on his chest while scrolling through tiktok

You landed on a video that showed a couple doing a rather interesting trend

You both just looked at each other and got up to take a quick stroll to the convenient store

You bought 20 packets of instant ramen.

Holy shit

If it wasn't for his constant fighting lifestyle as a gang leader, mf would've been fatter than yo mama

So you tried to do the challenge

And failed

You tried again

Failed again

By now, like, 2 hours have passed and Manjiro was still hungry

At one point, he just got tired and took the ramen bowl and went to sit somewhere in private to eat it

You took the flag from it and raised it over his head

🤨

Let's be honest if there wasn't a flag he wouldn't have participated

He chuckled, took the flag, and placed it on top of the ramen

"Let's try again?"

He's so fucking cute when them dark impulses are light 😻

In the end, you didn't do the trend properly, but at least you had fun

But

Guess what

He's still hungry

"But there is no more ramen left?"

He smirked

"Who said I'll be eating ramen?"

He started walking towards you

Your eyes widened as you took a step backwards

Manjiro leaned towards your face, inches away before he walked past you and took out a Taiyaki out of the shopping bag

He winked at you and left the kitchen

"Motherfucker..."

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themultifandomgal · 1 year

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Antonio- Trying For A Baby/Finding Out

Shit shit shit. That's all I can think as I sit on the toilet seat after I just finished throwing up. My period is late, my boobs hurt. I have all of the tell tale signs of being pregnant. Yes Antonio and I have spoken about having a baby, but we didn't mean now. We've only been together for a year, living together for only like 6 months, how's Antonio going to react. I suppose I first of all need to see if I'm actually pregnant so I grab my purse and head to the nearest convenience store. I pick up a box of pregnancy sticks, purchase them and run home before anyone can see me.

The longest 5 minutes of my life happen and now I'm staring at two pink lines. Shit.

Shaking I stand up and place the test on the side of the sink while I wash my hands. How am I going to tell Antonio? How do we tell Eva and Diego? Will it be frowned upon because Antonio and I aren't married or even engaged? Oh god and my brothers, how are they going to react? The sound of the door opening pulls me out of my thoughts

"YN?" Antonio shouts

"Coming" I throw the used stick in the trash and the unused I put in the cupboard with my pads. I run out of the bathroom and downstairs to greet Antonio. I kiss his cheek "how was work?"

"Made a few arrests so it was a good day. How was your day?"

"Fine. Cleaned the house, had a nap, sorted Eva and Diego's beds for when they come to stay next week"

"Have you eaten at all?" He asks, but the thought of food turns my stomach

"Er yeah, I ate earlier" I lie

"I'll order in then. You sure you won't want anything?"

"No I'm good" I smile. I make my way to the couch and sit down. After Antonio orders his food he sits next to me, I immediately snuggle into him.

His food finally arrives but when Antonio joins me back on the couch the smell makes me immediately run to the toilet

"Babe? You alright?" I hear him shout for me as I start heaving in the toilet bowl, bringing up the small amount of food I've managed to eaten today "babe?" I grab some toilet paper wipe my nose and mouth before flushing the toilet and brush my teeth "what's wrong? Are you not well?" Antonio frowns. My eyes start to water "babe talk to me what's going on?" Knowing I can't hid this from him I spit and take a deep breath sitting back on the seat of the toilet

"I'm pregnant" I whisper. After a moment of silence I look up at Antonio "please say something"

"I'm sorry, I was just waiting for you to tell me why your sad about this"

"Your not mad?"

"Why would I be mad?" Antonio smiles cupping my face in his hands "we're having a baby"

"We've only just moved in together and we didn't plan this for now. We've been carful"

"Have we though? I can think of a few occasions where I've..."

"Ok ok I get it" I giggle as Antonio wipes my tears

"That's that smile. I know we didn't plan to have this baby now, but we knew we would one day so what makes now any different? I love you YN YLN and I can't wait to meet this little one"

"I love you too Toni. So much. I'm just worried about Eva and Diego. Also what about my brothers. We aren't married and we have 8 years between us, what if people talk?"

"Then let them talk. Our friends don't care and anyway it's only 8 years, it not like I'm twice your age. Eva and Diego will be fine and if your worried about Laura then don't be. This is nothing to do with her. I'm 36 YN and I know you want at least 2 children so better to start now before we get to old" Antonio chuckles

"When should we tell Eva and Diego?"

"I think sooner rather than later. So they can get used to the idea, also they hopefully won't feel then like we've left them out"

"I agree" I nod my head

"You ready to leave the bathroom?"

"Yeah" I breathe out standing up with Antonio's help

"Do you want anything to eat now?"

"Maybe some pancakes with syrup?"

"Go sit on the couch and I'll make you some"

"Your the best" I kiss Antonio's cheek.

#antonio dawson #antonio dawson imagine #antonio dawson x reader #Antonio Dawson x you #Antonio Dawson x oc #Antonio Dawson can #one chicago #one chicago imagine #chicago pd

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smrsxx · 1 year

Text

Expect The Unexpected | Zlatan Ibrahimović x Female Reader | Soulmate AU

Summary : She left her hometown and moved to Rome to study at her favorite University . That's what she said to the people that asked her , but she knows it's not the truth . She is in pain and she thinks that she's never gonna find her true love , until she came across him .

He reached a certain point in his life where the only think that he cared about was his career . He didn't believe in love and he certainly didn't believe in love at first sight , until he spotted the girl with the beautiful and big bright eyes .

Trigger Warnings : Mentions of past toxic relationship , abuse and harassment , anxiety and panic attacks , stress , self - harm , insomnia and angst .

DON'T WORRY THER'S GOING TO BE FLUFF AT THE END

P.s. Hello Tumblr : ) This is my first time uploading something that I wrote so please be kind . I actually was inspired to write this because of a conversation I had with my best friend and a recent dream I had. This is an AU imagine , where Zlatan isn't married , he dosen't have any kids and he is close friends with Lionel Messi . Also ,English isn't my first language so if you spot a mistake please bare with me .

This turned out way longer than I expected - 12k words : \

Enjoy < 3

__________________________________________________

Reader's POV

I checked my test paper for one last time while I was making my way through the busy hall filled with students .

" How did it go ? " The teacher that was responsible for receiving all the test's asked me .

" It went well . " I responded to her trying to keep my tears from escaping .

University is stressing me out more than anything else and the amounts of studying for the exams isn't helping at all . I decided against taking the bus to return to my apartment . Plus walking in autumn is way better . I took out my earphones to listen to some music , thinking that it will calm me down . And then , the moment music flooded in my ears I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

In less than 20 minutes I'm back in my apartment . Specifically in the kitchen floor crying my eyes out , while Fluffy was sitting in my lap.

" Well at least I have you in my life . " I say to my cat Fluffy while petting him on his little head . He let's out a meow and looks at me .

" Sometimes I really think that you are the only one that understand me . " I say to him with a smile . The he suddenly meows and walks torwards his bowl . My smile drops and I get up to feed him .

" You ate breakfast 2 hours ago and you're fat . " I say to him while I'm putting food in his bowl . He dosen't give me a second glance and starts eating his food .

Meanwhile I'm standing in the middle of the kitchen rubbing my temple trying to get rid of my headache .

Music still plays through my headphones and I realise that I left my phone on the counter .

Taking it in my hands I see that I have a new message from a number that I have deleted from my contacts way too long ago .

' Why are you not answering any of my calls or messages ? It's not that you have more important things to do . One day you'll regret leaving me . '

I can imagine him typing at his phone angrily while drinking a beer or geting high .

The memories make their way back in my head and suddenly I can see him infront of me yelling and throwing things all over the place .

" You are just worthless and a waste of time . Don't you see ? You are the reason why I cheated on you at the first place . It's your fault . Everything you do is stupid . Every desicion you make is stupid . You deserve nothing . "

And whenever I didn't react and remained silent he would start to throw glass bottles on me . One time he got me in the head and when I tried to leave he did it again and again until I fell unconscious in the floor . When I woke up I was still on the floor , but I was almost naked and my body was full of cigar burns and bruises .

I closed my eyes and tried to make the memories get out of my head.

The song People You Know by Selena Gomez was playing through my headphones .

" How ironic . " I said while blocking his number .

Flyffy was meowing at me trying to get my attention .

" He won't find us . He can't find us . We are gonna be okay . " I said to him and went to my bedroom to change and read my new book as peacefully I can .

_____

I feel something hairy close to my face and when I open my eyes I see Flyffy's orange head looking at me while sitting on top of my chest . I turn my head to the right and see that it's near 6 p.m.

I close my eyes again and when I open them after a couple of minutes, I go to the kitchen to feed Flyffy . I make a tea for me and I go to the bathroom to take a shower .

I start to take off my cloths but then I stop and take a good look at myself in the mirror . My hair looks a mess and my eyes are red and have dark circles from not sleeping enough .

I spot the scars from the cigar burns on my shoulders and chest and I immediately look at my wrist's and thigh's . The scars I made myself a few days before are still visible .

Tears escape my eyes and I feel worthless and weak .

I try to calm myself down by stepping into the shower and for a few minutes I fell better under the hot droplets of the water . When I step out , I wrap myself with a white towel and go to my bedroom to put some comfy cloaths .

I change and I sit on my bed , but before I can open my book to read I hear a notification from my phone .

Flyffy jump's on the bed and I grab my phone hoping that everything is okay and I'm safe .

' Did you really think that by just blocking my number you could get away from me ? '

I stare at my screen for God know's how long .

My tea that has been sitting on top of my nightstand is now cold .

_____

Zlatan's POV

I'm basically training non - stop . I wake up at the morning and I go to the gym at the training centre , then I train with the others , the I train by myself again . Basically all I do is train . My goal is to become an even better version of myself . I want to show them what I'm capable of doing . My agent said to me that there is a chance that I'll be transferring in AC Milan in a couple of weeks . I actually can't wait to leave this team . I've been here for two years and the only think that I've been doing is running up and down a field . I decided that I'll keep in touch with Lionel and couple players , but that's it .

Now , I'm in my house playing PS3 and waiting for my agent to call me and tell me when I'll be leaving for Milan . I want to visit Rome first thought . I feel that I have the need to go there . Maybe it's because I've never really went out in the city when I visited last time .

After a few days , I'm sitting in a private jet flying from Spain to Italy with Lionel . He decided to come with me because as he said " I need a break from all this and besides you need me here . Your happiness depends on me . I'm gonna help you have fun . Do you even now what that is ? " He said to me .

" What are you even saying to me ? This is bullshit . Ofcourse I know what happiness is . I have fun on my own . " I answered looking at him.

He just looked at me and responded to me with that smile of his .

" How come you didn't bring Antonela with you ? " I asked trying to change the topic of the conversation .

" Do you wanted her to talk about your non existing love life for the whole trip and how you haven't found your soulmate yet ? " He aksed while looking at his phone .

I just granted in response .

I've reached a certain point in my life where all I can think is my career . And besides that I don't need love and all that in my life . I'm perfectly fine on my own .

And with that I closed my eyes and tried to sleep .

_____

" Wake up . We're landing . " Lionel said to me while rocking my shoulder .

I checked my seatbelt and waited for the touch - down .

In less than one hour I've settled into my new home and getting ready to go walk in the town . I just feel the need to walk alone .

_____

Reader's POV

I was sitting in my couch reading my book . Flyffy is sleeping besides me . I'm bored . Should I maybe go out ? I ask myself and befone I knew it I was in front of my closet trying to find what to wear .

I decided on a pair of black sweatpands and a hoodie . I puy on my black jacket and shoes and before I step out of the door I grab my earphones and keys . I decided to go to the fountain Fontana di Trevi since it was beautiful to look at night .

I put on my earphones to listen to some music while I'm walking .

Rome at night is so noisy , but in the same time so silent .

Especially if you're all alone .

I'm alone .

The fountain is so beautiful . I search at my pockets for some coins to throw .

I look at the gold coin in my hand and tears start to form in my eyes .

' I don't wanna be alone anymore . I say to myself and wipe my tears with the back of my hand .

I throw the coin in the fountain and then I take a deep breath .

I suddenly feel the urge to turn my head to the right and when I do , I came across a pair of dark brown eyes staring at me like they want to know my deapest secrets . I take a step back and study his body . He is tall maybe over 6 feet , has a small ponytail , strong jaw - but then again - I lock my eyes in his and can't seem to get away .

_____

Zlatan's POV

I was throwing some coins in the fountain . It was noisy and some people recognized me and asked for a photo now and there , but still it was in a way - silent .

I turn left ready to leave and head back to my home until I came across a small figure not so close to me but not so far away that I couldn't not see their face .

She's short , maybe 5 ' 2 and she has dark brown hair . A tear rolls down her face but she quickly wiped with the back of her hand . When she turns her head towards my direction , I came across a pair of bright blue eyes - the kind of blue I loved in my entire life . Like the blue of the morning sky .

And we lock gazes - looking at each other for some seconds , until she takes a step back to look at my face .

My eyes don't leave hers even for a seccond - and we just stay like this . Looking each other and I can't seem to look away .

_____

They are looking at each other for a couple of minutes , but when she turns her gaze away trying to leave , he reacts quickly by slightly grabbing her left palm .

She stops dead in her tracks at the sudden touch .

His big hand covers her small one , but she doesn't protest . She just stays there enjoying the warmth of his palm over her cold one .

After looking at her for a little more he realized that she looked kinda scared so he left her hand .

" I'm sorry . I don't know why I did that . " He said to her .

He had a deep voice with an accent that and she thought that she could listen to his voice for the rest of life .

" It's okay . " She answered while looking at him .

And suddenly , the both felt the exact same thing . He felt in peace and for once in his life he wasn't mad . She felt safe for the first time in a really long time . They felt like they were made for one another .

" I need to get back home . I mean ... I - I have a cat and he's alone - " She said but she stoped after a smile appeared in his face .

" Let me walk you home . " He said to her while coming a little closer .

She just nodded her head and bite her her lower lip .

They started walking together silently when she stopped and looked up at him . He was already looking at her . He then grabbed her hand in his and started walking again .

_____

They walked holding hands in the night and when they reacher her complex apartment he looked down at her .

" I know that all of this is weird, but can I have your number ? I mean I already know where you live now . " He said while smiling and she laughed nodding her head .

_____

When she entered her apartment , she threw her keys in the counter and fell in the couch with a smile .

Flyffy came running towards her meowing .

" You'll never believe what happened . " She said to the orange cat while looking at him .

Where Have You Been by Rihanna was playing through her earphones. She took her phone in her hands and when she looked at the screen , there was a new message from him .

From the man with the dark brown eyes .

Zlatan : Still can't explain what happened an hour ago . Can I see you tomorrow ?

' How ironic ' She thought while answering him with a smile .

_____

Tags : @unimportantbabymilksharkte

#footballer imagine #football fanfic #football x reader #football x you #zlatan ibrahimovic imagines #zlatan ibrahimovic x reader #zlatan ibrahimovic x you

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starkidblogs · 1 year

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The Revenge Of The Spider Queen

A/n: Hi there! This chapter is much shorter because I cannot work on it as much due to work and family matters. I hope you can still enjoy it.

Chapter Eight 1/2

It was only a few days after the attack of Demon Bull King, and now it was the lunar New Year. A time to celebrate by spending time with family and friends, but you couldn't. Not with everything on your mind. Your fingers fidget with your necklace as you drown out the noises of the crowds.

~After DBK attack~

After the attack of the Demon Bull King and the bull clones, the city was a chaotic mess. During this time, the gang helps the citizens with the disaster mess. As for you, you had gone to check in on Bai He and her family. You were worried that something terrible happened to them.

Before you left to see them, you went back home. When you enter the boutique, you realize something missing. Chief's suit wasn't on the mannequin. You were worried and wondering if you had miss placed it, but found a bright blue note. You raised an eyebrow as you read it.

'My dear, (Y/n),

I'm glad to see that my clothes have been tailored, to fit me perfectly. Unfortunately, I had to leave before thanking you properly due to urgent matters that needed my attention. However, I promise to express my gratitude when I see you again.

Sincerely your Chief'

You smiled as your face had a pink glow on your cheek. You felt happy to read he liked the suit, but something was off. You couldn't understand why it felt like you were reading a different person's penmanship. You assume it was simply due to lack of sleep and ignore the idea.

Once you hit the road, you hoped Bai He and her family had escaped the bull clone invasions and were far away from the city. Luckily, you discovered that they had just returned home.

Unfortunately, things did not go as planned. Upon arriving at Bai He's house, you were greeted by her distressed parents rushing towards you. After you got out of the car, you spoke with them and inquired about the situation. Their tear-filled explanation painted a bleak picture.

Bai He had gone missing.

Her parents explained how she went after the cat after it escaped the house before DBK's attack, but she never returned home. They checked with the police, but she wasn't there. They were hoping that she was with you, but they noticed that you arrived there alone. As you listened, you became stunned, and your gut twisted with fear about what might have happened to her.

A report was made about a missing child, but the police were occupied with handling multiple emergencies resulting from the attack. The only thing you and your group could do was search for the child. You put up missing posters at your boutique and Pigsy's noodles. You went to her favorite but nothing. As time went by without any leads, it became apparent that you were struggling. Your friends noticed that you were not getting enough sleep and had poor eating habits. To ease your mind, even momentarily, Sandy and Mei suggested taking you to the festival.

~Present~

You sighed in frustration as you sat in Pigsy's food van as the festival became more lively with each passing minute. You were too deep in thought to notice the bowl of noodles in front of you. It wasn't until Pigsy snapped you out of it, "Kid, your noodles are going to go soggy if you keep staring at them." He said as he started to make another bowl. "Oh yeah... Sorry, Pigsy." You said as you ate.

"I understand you are not feeling well, but if you don't take care of yourself, you can't give your best to help her." The demon pig said as you finished the bowl of noodles, staring down at the leftover broth, seeing your hazy reflection. "You're right." you said, "I need to get better before I find more problems or create them." You say, with a sigh, as Pigsy served another patron.

Your attention turned to the struggle of the dragon horse girl. Looking up to see Mei struggling to fold the dumplings, you could have sworn you heard her say something about how difficult it is without fingers. You chuckled as you offered to help. Mei smiled and gave you a few to fold.

Tang ate his noodles as he saw his husband becoming more stressed. "Mei, (Y/n). Is it me, or does Pigsy seem more stressed than normal?" He said to you. Making all three see the demon pig forcing a smile and sweating. You can feel the tension coming off of him."Yeah, isn't Mk suppose to be working?" You asked them, but as you said, Mk's name caused Pigsy to snap.

"YES! (Y/N), HE IS! " He yelled at the three of you, as he continued, "WHERE IS THAT PUNK! CAUSE HE'S SURE AIN'T HERE!" You and Tang held your breath cause you didn't know where Mk was until Mei spoke up. "He's training with the Monkey King!" She casually said to Pigsy. " He said, 'NEW YEAR, NEW MK! I'm going to take my training to a whole new level!'" She finished, posing like Mk and using a mop on the counter. You laughed as a frustrated Pigsy seized the mop from Mei and snapped it in half. "Gimme that!"

"NeW yEaR nEw Mk! Keep going like this, he'll be newly unemployed!" Pigsy said as he created another bowl. "I mean it! If mk don't get here soon, I'm gonna," Before he could finished, he was interrupted by a looming shadow. He screamed, causing you to turn towards the figure. You saw a very festive Sandy, his arms filled with treats, toys, red envelopes, and candy. "Good cheer and Happy New Year!" Sandy grinned as he dropped his haul on the counter and some on Pigsy. "Look at all these delicious little goodies! I got enough to share." He proudly said.

Tang, You, and Mei were impressed, "Oooh! Thanks, Sandy." Mei thanked the blue man. You picked up an orange from the pile and started to peel it. "Yeah, Thank you, Sandy." you smiled at him.

"No problem! So um. Where's Mk?" Sandy said as he scratched his head. Pigsy burst out of the treats and toy he was under. He shouted, "WOULD YOU GUYS, PLEASE, SCREW AROUND SOMEWHERE ELSE!" Making you flinch and drop the half-peeled orange. "If you ain't going to help, go bothered somewhere else!"

"Aw... My orange." You playful pouted, seeing it go down the drain. Mei and Sandy laughed while Tang ate more noodles, and you peeled another orange. Pigsy moves the treats and toy from the counter, "At least clear the counter!" He said.

Sandy sat down next to you while you ate your orange. "You okay? You seem to be doing better." He asked, as you nod your head and gave him a piece of your orange. " I am doing a little better now that I'm here with you guys." You sigh with a soft smile. Sandy pats your back as he accepts your offer. "That's good to hear. Don't worry, we'll find her," he reassured you.

"Thanks, guys." You smiled. Time flies by as you guys made your way to the lunar new year parade. Sandy carries Tang and Mei to get an amazing view of the floats. They were incredible as you watch the dancers, the dragons, and the fireworks. All of you were in awe as you saw it pass by. "Man, Mk is surely missing this!" Mei said as you agreed. "Yeah, look at all these cool floats!" You chirped with joy.

"There's the dragon one, and there's the spider one," Sandy said, confusing the gang. "What? There's no spider in the zodiac. It's probably just an eight-legged roster-" Tang said as he turned to the floats. "An eight-legged roster, Tang? I don't think they would mess up that bad-" you responded, but you saw the float.

It was a spider float, a machine-like spider with bright purple and green colors. Everyone was shocked and confused about the strange float, the whole parade stopped in its track. "What's happening?" You questioned as you felt your gut turn.

To be continued.

Words:1,364

#lego monkie kid x reader #lego monkie kid #starkidwritings #lmk mayor x reader #lmk mayor #lmk mk #lmk bai he #lmk tang #lmk sandy #lmk pigsy #lmk mei #lmk x reader #lmk spider queen

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sicjimin · 4 months

Text

— A Public (Hidden) Signs —

Part 1.

a.n : hi !! this is a request, actually. And wow i didn't expect it will came out this long ! sooo, i will split it into 2 parts 😁 i hope this won't be boring to read , and for anon, again i'm sorry this takes long ... i hope you're still around and like it !

tw : emeto, mpreg, graphic description of vomiting

Jimin could think of hundreds reasons of why he's feeling sick—that he also has been giving out to any other person too, "it's the jetlag, i was too exhausted", "i haven't eat anything yet maybe my stomach was upset", "i think i still get caught on the plane, i have motion sickness", "dancing way too hard always makes me nauseous to be honest, the weather tonight was quite hot too i think i lack of fresh air" — everytime they found him at the trashcan near the stage stairs, or at the change room hunching over the bag while makeup artist was left frozen not knowing what's the right step to do in the 5 minutes VCR left, or when he's disappearing few minutes before going on stage and came back with glassy eyes and red nose. And he always brushed it off, believing that all the reasons he had spewed out was actually the right reasons—he means, what else could it be? he just has sensitive stomach, and it has been that way since he's a child ; and he also always vomited only once in a day (even though it's almost happen everyday) and then he's feeling better. So he sees no reason to make a big deal to go for a check up—even Yoongi has given up at his stubbornness.

But like the saying—as good as a squirrel could jump, they bout to fall too someday.

And the saying fits Jimin now.

If he could say, today was one of the bad borderline worse day he ever had. He never felt this sick in his almost 28 years of his life. Something is definitely wrong with him.

It's started at the crack ass dawn, 2 AM, that he stirs awake. His sleep-clouded brain hasn't caught up on anything that could make him suddenly awake at this time as he looks around at his dimmed bedroom. Yoongi is still sleeping soundly, curled on his side as little snores came out of his lips. There's no misscall or any urgent messages either in his phone. There's no noises other than white static buzz from the unwatched television and Yoongi's breathing. Jimin frowns, as he feels something is off with him. He huffs—and moves his hand to curls around his stomach and give it a hesitant rub. It feels bloated. But as far as he can remember, he didn't eat that much yesterday? He even skipped dinner as they both too exhausted after the press conference and rehearsal. His frowns get deeper when the rubbing turns out pressing a wrong spot that makes him burp—he shuddered. It feels gross. It tastes like jjajangmyeon he ate for lunch earlier. He sits up, wanting to wash the aftertaste away by drinking the water—but apparently his body think that was a wrong movement, as the water sloshes around his stomach, and before he can react, it splashes back to the back of his throat. Jimin gasps, quickly clamping his mouth—as he can feels not only water, but his other stomach content also climbing up as his stomach contracts with a gag—and dashes to the bathroom.

But the force of his nausea is too strong to contain. Jimin lets out a loud, gagging belch and covers his mouth with both hands at the bathroom door. He can feel the bitter, acidic taste of his vomit in his mouth and throat. He barely make it on time as he bends over the toilet bowl and lets out another loud belch, then throws up. The retching and vomiting becoming more violent as the minutes pass. His stomach muscles contract and flutter, as if they are squeezing out the last of his lunch. At one point, some solid food comes back up—he can make the black color it's from his jjajangmyeon earlier.

"Jimin-ah .."

Jimin is so caught up in the sickness that he doesn't even notice his boyfriend right behind him, gently rubbing his back and massaging his nape. It does seem to help, too, because the force and intensity of nausea finally subsides a bit. After a minute or two, he leans back with a deep sigh of relief. "I... i wake you up?", he croaks out, sniffling as he reaches for toilet paper and wipes his teary eyes, nose, and wet lips. "I'm sorry .."

"Nah, i wake up on my own. I don't feel you beside me and then i heard you vomiting", Yoongi says softly as he flushes the toilet and settles beside the latter. "What's wrong? Why are you not waking me up if you feel sick?"

"I also don't know hyung .. it was so sudden", Jimin replies, grimacing a bit when he can still taste the bile and remnant of vomit coating his tongue. "Let me rinse my mouth a bit .. it feels weird, and makes me nauseous again", he shuffles, swaying a bit as he stands up and walk to the sink. Yoongi trails behind him silently, even watching his every movement to rinse his mouth and brushing his teeth from the mirror. Like a possessive kitten—especially with his hair fresh from sleep and sticking up everywhere.

The older quickly swoop him back to bed, making Jimin rests his head on his chest while he plays with the blonde lock. "Are you feeling better now? Want anything?"

"Mhm ..", Jimin shrugs, "It was so weird, i was feeling fine before sleeping, and then i feel bloated. I tried to drink but then ..", he groans, nuzzling further into his boyfriend crooks. "I think it was the jjajangmyeon"

"Really?", Yoongi frowns. "But i ate the same thing with you though? And i feel fine?"

Jimin shrugs again, not wanting to think too much as exhaustion catching up on him again. "Dunno ... you know my stomach is weird these days", he yawns, gaining a coos and ruffles on his hair, "That's why you should check up, Min .. there's nothing wrong with it"

"Meh .. i will feel better then"

"You are so stubborn"

"But you love me", Jimin yawns again, his words starts to slur.

"I do", Yoongi hums, "Sleep now"

***

Jimin is wrong—utterly completely wrong. Because as he woke up this morning, nausea been latching on him like a sticky tape. He hasn't throw up again yet, but he definitely will soon. He had been gagging on his hand after finishing his scrambled egg for breakfast that he ate with lots of effort. He had sucking the mint candy hard and desperately while clutching Yoongi's hand as the older whispering a comforting words on the car as his motion sickness adding the intensity of nausea waves over him. It's just .. bad. It feels like he's waiting for something to completely knocked off his resilliance and makes him throw up all over the floor.

"Still sick, love?", Yoongi plops beside him, sitting on the edge of couch that occupied by Jimin as soon as the rehearsal over. The heat outside making him dizzy, so he rushes inside as soon as the music stops and curling himself small on the couch. Jimin nods, not daring to open his mouth as his tongue feels like it's weight a ton—and he's afraid that he might vomit if he attempt to speak as he had been quietly belching on his fist for the past 10 minutes.

"Is there anything that could help?", Yoongi asks again, brushing sweaty locks that framing Jimin's flushed cheeks. Jimin shakes his head, squeezing his eyes tight. "Stay here ..", he grits through his clenched teeth, immediately taking a big deep inhale as nausea rises few levels when he opens his mouth.

"That bad?", without opening his eyes, Jimin can tell that the older is frowning hard.

"Mhm .."

Yoongi sighs, not moving an inch from his position as he keeps placing a soft touch all over the younger body, and shushing away every questions and confused gazes that the other members thrown at them. They stay like that for 15 minutes, before Jimin groans, "Gosh .. i'm going to the bathroom, it's better if i throw up now", he grunts, then snatching Yoongi's wrist to go with him to the bathroom.

True to his words, his body knows that it's a greenlight when it comes to the bathroom as Jimin immediately gagging as soon as they see the bathroom door. "Fuck", he breathes out between his clamped mouth and pick up his paces. He didn't get to find a proper position first before he lets loose another loud, heaving belch. It was empty at first. He sucks a deep breathe, as his stomach readying itself. "Hyung—", he chokes out, blindly searching for the older hands for support. "I feel so sick .."

"I know, love .. it's okay. You will feel bett—", Jimin cut off the comforting words with a deep guttural gag, followed by something solid comes up to his throat. It was harsh, as he almost dived himself to the bowl with how hard his stomach contracts. He cough up a lumpy, wet chunk of food. It stings the back of his throat and he has to work several times to get it all up. "Hyung ..", Jimin pants in the lull of it, as he keep heaving until the bile is all clear. But even after everything's out of his stomach, his stomach continues to rumble and heave. He burps several times and groans out another belch, still very queasy.

"Better?", Yoongi asks as he reaches to flushes the full toilet. Jimin shakes his head, sniffling as he stares at the swirling water. There gone his breakfast. "I don't know .. i still feel nauseous", Jimin croaks out as he press his stomach—triggering a burp.

Yoongi hums understandingly, "You're breaking cold sweat, Min. Do you want me to asks for medicine?"

"Mhm", Jimin hums before cursing under his breath, as nausea washes over him again. He gags, letting out few sprays of clear water. "Fuck .. that's it .. i'm done", he moans, letting himself slumps against the toilet seat.

"Baby .. that's dirty", Yoongi peels him away, then helps him cleans up, as Jimin clings to him—losing all his energy.

Jimin get all the stares he was expecting as soon as he and Yoongi back to the waiting room. "Sick again hyung?", Jungkook scoots closer to him while Yoongi moves around to get the meds and something light for him to much. He can't go on stage on an empty stomach, especially remembering how hard their choreo is. "Mhm", Jimin mumbles, resting his head over the younger shoulder. "You don't want to sit this one, Jimin-ah?", Namjoon asks from somewhere, "Yeah .. it's better rather than you faint on the stage", Jin chimes in too, causing Jimin to frowns at the suggestions, "No .. i can do this. And isn't it a hastle to sit me out on this one? You're making the staff works more, they need to put out an announcement, and don't you think the fans wont be dissapointed—"

"Jimin-ah, watch your tone. Breathe", Hobi cuts his rambles, and Jimin gasps, realizing what he has been spitting out and to Whom he did it. "Oh gosh .. Joon hyung .. Jin hyung .. i'm so sorry i don't know what's going on i just feel tired but it didn't excuse i lashed out like that i'm so sorry i didn't meant to—"

"Sshh ... Jimin-ah, baby ..", Yoongi peels him away from Jungkook, "Ssh .. it's okay. Joon and Jin-hyung understand you didn't mean bad. Right?"

"Yes, Jimin-ah, we're just concerned for you", Namjoon hums, squatting in front of the blonde and pat his shoulders in comforting manners, "Relax Min, i'm not upset"

"Mhm, hyung just concerned. That's it. If you think you can handle it then that's fine", Jin chimes in, ruffling his hair. Jimin sniffles, " 'm sorry .. i don't know what's getting into me"

Yoongi smiles, "Here .. there's energy bar and medicine that supposed to calm down your stomach"

***

The medicine didn't work. Jimin is tired. He has lost count how many times today he had to hide under the blind spot on the stage to bend over his knees—catching his breath while gagging at the same time. At one point, he managed to push out a gush of water over the trashcan that the staff has prepared—looking at his predicament, as that's the only thing he took during the concert. By the time the encore done, Jimin was left exhausted.

"Still nauseous?", Yoongi asks as they prepared to leave. Jimin sprawl at the couch, looking slightly paler. His usually plump lips has gone chapped with how much he throws up and gagging today. It feels like water has left his body just in 5 minutes after he took it. "Mhm ..", Jimin hums, letting Yoongi pull himself to stand up as they leave to the car. "I feel like my soul has got sucked out"

Yoongi chuckles, holding the younger by his shoulders. "Still don't want to go to the hospital? We can get a quick check up, love .. you throws up a lot, i'm worried"

Jimin groans, as he shuffles to the seat. Yoongi plops besides him. "I just want to sleep now hyung. And we're in a foreign country", he sighs. Deep down he also want to put this on stop. Feeling nauseous all the time has driving him crazy actually. "When we go back to Korea?", Jimin bargains, and it swells his heart as he sees Yoongi lits up at his words. He yelps when the older leans forward to steal a quick peck, "Deal"

***

If Jimin tought yesterday was bad, then today must've classified as Worst.

Today, the kitchen sink is the victim of his morning routine, and it was triggered by the hotel breakfast buffet. But he can't pinpoint which one that causing it as he took few small portion from the menu and ran with it. It was when he's back in his room and getting ready that his stomach starts to churn.

Before he knows it, he already lounged to the sink, hands gripping the marble counter with a force that makes his nail white, as his body wracked with discomfort and queasiness. The sound of his gagging and retching into the metal sink echoes throughout the small hotel room. The vomit splattering against the sink in heavy, wet sprays. It's not the usual soupy chunks, but a mess of bile and chunky food matter, like a brown, wet gravy. Jimin's eyes water as he keeps trying to purge the food from his stomach that's so desperate to come back up.

"Gosh .. you're throwing up a lot, love", Yoongi coos from the back. His hand adding the pressure around the younger back, patting it as he chokes on a particular deep gag—resulting in a heavy plops of thick vomit. Maybe it was the dessert this times. Jimin splutters, turning the tap, desperately to rinse his mouth and getting rid of the mess. The sight making him want to hurl more. "All of my breakfast .. ", he sniffles, "Gone hyung .."

"I know", Yoongi answers as he peels himself away to get his boyfriend glass of water. He winces when new found gag can be heard again. He trudges there back, swiping Jimin's hair in one swift motion and tied it before focusing again to the vomiting session in hand. It took him another few dry heaves before his stomach deemed it done.

"I'm so tired hyung ..", Jimin sighs, slumping against the counter as he's too tired to walk to the couch and rest properly. Yoongi is about to reply, when both of their phone ring—their manager is calling, and it's time to go. Jimin groans, before stomping his feet to go.

And it was just like yesterday, except this time Jimin didn't get to bring himself to the bathroom—instead snatching a plastic bag on the table to vomit. He didn't even know what's causing it this time. He had been feeling nauseated as always when he's in the car, but he was just resting on the couch when nausea mounting quickly. He jolts from his position, before projectile vomiting into the plastic bag. His whole body heaving with the force of each painful retch. The vomit is almost all liquid now, barely any solid chunks to his stomach's content at last.

"Jimin ..", someone was beside him, wrapping his arms around his shoulder as Jimin ducked his head down to the bag. He's past feeling embarassed as the sickness is feeling more overwhelming. "Sorry ..", still he feels bad for everyone in the tiny room have to hear him tossing his guts out.

"It's okay .. let it out"

And Jimin back at it—he coughs and sputters his way through another bout of dry heaving, expelling even more water from his body until he's practically bent over, head almost touching his knees if it wasn't for someone holding his shoulder, with his hands gripping the bag tightly. He closes his eyes and lets his tears fall as his body rumbles and churns violently without anything left inside his stomach. "Ah ... hurts", he moans when he finally managed to straighten himself.

"Better?"

Ah, apparently it was Seokjin. Yoongi was also crouching beside him with worry apparent in his eyes. He accepts water that the older hands him, taking a little sips as he isn't sure if his stomach want to cooperate now. "Thank you hyung", he murmurs, letting Seokjin take the bag away and Yoongi scurries to his side. "Baby .. you sure you still want to—"

"Hyung .. please", Jimin pleas, tired of this circling conversation. "I'm sorry .. i'm just—"

"Worried .. i know", Jimin sighs.

"Jimin-ah", Seokjin trudges towards him, but now with IV on his hand. "Do you want to take this? It will help you dehydrated, and maybe feeling better before we go up there"

Jimin nods, willing to accept anything as long as he can go on stage. Yoongi trails beside him as they walk to the emergency make-shift room, and he held his hand during the process.

The IV works wonder—Jimin was estatic that he gonna get to end the concert without a significant hitch. He was able to push through 3/4 of the concert without wanting to throw up. The nausea is still there, but at least it's never spiked up until he needs to throw up. But little did he know that it was a calm before storms—as by the time for encore, it feels like the vitamin and liquid that has been injected to him vanished into thin air. Nausea crashing at him in full force as they are singing So What—that requires him to jump around and be as energetic as he can. He did try to slow down his pace, not jumping around as much ; but it's just inevitable as he sees the audience jumping around too. How can he not gives back the same amount of energy? Even though it's at the cost of feeling his stomach content jolts at the back of his throat every time he jumps.

He reached his peak during Anpanman—the bouncy castles tipped him off the edge. After several, agonizing minutes of wrestling with his body and fighting nausea, Jimin finally just can't keep himself from being sick again. He walks away from the bouncy castles, hoping that it would lessen the churning on his stomach from the movement. But apparently his stomach has become to sensitive, that even walking around making the queasiness intensifies. His muscles feel weak and his head light—Jimin stands still, his ears ringing in between the roar of his blood rushing and the thump of his in-ear monitor ; before he rushes to the back. He can't think of anything but not vomiting his guts out on the stage. He just hopes that he didn't run off on his part. He barely make it to the stairs, when he belches. He cupped his mouth, hoping that the staff already know what's going on and turn off his mic. By the time he got down, his cheeks already filled with vomit.

Staff running off to him, catching his swaying body by the end of stairs and immediately handing him a sick bag. Jimin didn't need to try—one burp already enough to fill the bag with his stomach contents. He sucks a deep breathe ; it hurts to do so, as he still also panting from adrenaline on the stage. His breath comes as a painful gasps, before his stomach belches violently, and he feels a hot, greasy mess flow up his throat and into his mouth. He gags and burps as a bigger wave of vomit flows into the bag. His body shakes and trembles with discomfort. "Oh gosh...", he mutters again, closing his eyes and waiting for the latest bout of illness to fade.

He barely keep his consciousness during the whole ordeal as he can't pull the sick bag away from his mouth—suddenly, he's already in the emergency room, with staff surrounding him. One holding an oxygen can, another fanning him, and another helping him to hold the sick bag.

"Jimin!"

#bts sickfic #bts emeto #tw emeto #tw vomit #and again another mpreg fic #sick!jimin #caretaker!yoongi

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obx-pogue4life · 2 years

Text

Pancake Thief

Summary: You and JJ get high, get hungry and one of you ends up making pancakes and wondering what happened to the rest of your short stack...

Warning: Food trigger, swearing, mentions of getting high, drug use

I had just finished smoking a bowl with my boyfriend and we were lying next to each other on the couch, just vibing and listening to music. My head was resting on his chest and I was completely blissed out when I heard his stomach growl ridiculously loud.

"JJ what the fuck, baby," I giggled

"Well shit," he said sheepishly and started laughing. "I'm so fucking hungry."

He rolled over onto his side, putting us face to face and looked at me with his adorable puppy dog eyes and gave me a shit eating grin. I playfully rolled my eyes and giggled again.

"OK J, what do you feel like, baby?" I asked him sweetly.

He stared at me for a minute, still vibing, but thinking. All of the sudden I could see the lightbulb go off in his head and he smiled a huge smile and started nodding his head like a weirdo. "Pancakes. We fucking need pancakes," he drawled out.

I sighed and smiled at him. "Sure J, anything for you," I say in an only half mocking tone. This boy owned my ass and he knew it. Anything he wanted, he usually got, right down to the fucking pancakes. And with that statement he was completely satisfied with my answer and he layed back and closed his eyes.

"Guess he's not gonna help make these pancakes," I thought to myself as I started to get up. Honestly though, that was ok with me because trying to do things in the kitchen with JJ was sometimes like doing them with a little kid. It was always fun but took twice as long and we always ended up with a huge mess and slightly burned food. My man is a lot of things, but a kitchen wiz is not one of them.

After I made the batter and started heating up my griddle, a very handsy JJ sauntered into the kitchen and just as I'm about to flip my first batch, he puts his strong arms around me and hugs me from behind, resting his head lazily on my shoulder, just watching me cook.

"You're so good to me, babe," he says as he starts to kiss my neck. "I love you."

I smile to myself at this rare and pure confession of love from him and turn around, handing him a platter of 8 pancakes and two plates for us, kissing him on the cheek. "Love you more," I say softly as we talk to the table. I give myself 3 pancakes and offer JJ the rest, which he greedily takes and immediately starts eating them, even though I forgot to get out the forks.

"I forgot the forks J, I'll be right back," I say to him, only to get a grunting "mmmhmmhhm" back from him. I shake my head knowing full well that even if I get him a fork, he'll prolly still just roll them up and eat them with his hands still but hey, a girl can try to civilize her man, right?!

Finally sitting down, I go to pour the syrup on my stack of pancakes and notice I only have 2. Furrowing my brow, I say out loud but not really talking to anyone in particular, "how fucking high am I?"

"No where near as toasted as me, babe!" JJ immediately says and laughs.

"No, J," I laugh too and playfully smack his arm. "That's not what I mean. I could've sworn I had three pancakes on my plate. I know I did...I trailed off, confused."

JJ looked at me and then looked at his plate and then back at me with soft but nervous eyes. He could tell I was putting 2 and 2 together but he cleared his throat and then took another huge bite of pancakes.

"Really..., I smile at him. I could have sworn it," I say again. With a silly grin on his face and his mouth full of food, he says "nah, I don't think so babe," and starts to laugh.

"JJ MAYBANK YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE," I playfully shout to my cackling boyfriend. "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ATE MY FUCKING PANCAKE AND THEN LIED ABOUT IT," I half laugh, half shout.

"You, my love are, are ridiculous," I say to him, rolling my eyes.

"Oh, you know you love me," he smirks at you.

"Well I used to...," you trail off and smile at him. "But that was before I found out who you really are!"

"Oh yeah?" he questions you. "And who's that?"

"A PANCAKE THIEF!" you shout and snatch the last pancake off his plate and take a huge bite!

"You're gonna pay for that, missy," he jokes and starts to chase me around the kitchen. When he corners me at the sink, he grabs both my wrists and holds them above my head and kisses me. I immediately melt into his touch and can feel him start to let my hands go free. Still holding on to that half of a pancake, I pull away and look him right in the eyes and say, "you know, all you had to do was ask and I would have given you them all and just made more, right?"

A slight shade of red creeped onto his cheeks. "I know babe, I was just so fucking starved," he drawled out again. "I'm sorry."

"It's ok. I forgive you," you say with a wink. "So, is there anything you wanna say now," you prompt him, dangling the half of a pancake in the space between the two of you.

"Can I have the last half, babe?" he says flashing a gigantic tooth smile.

"WHAT?!! ARE YOU NUTS?!!, you say to him, cracking up, as you shove the last of the pancake into your mouth. "NO FUCKING WAY," you giggle. "You cannot have my pancake."

"But you just sai-," he starts to say but you cut him off. "Sucks when someone lies about pancakes, doesn't it!"

"You are gonna pay for that" he says grinning.

"Hmmm... I feel like I've heard that somewhere before," I taunt, trying to rile him up. He leans in and kisses me on the lips.

"So you're not mad, right?, he asks.

"Nah, baby. I was just messing with you. I never was. We're good," you reassure him.

He sighs in relief and kisses my forehead and pulls me in for a hug.

"You're lucky you're cute, Maybank," you chuckle.

"Aww, you know you love me, babe," he says cockily.

"I do love you J, my cute little piglet," you joke as the both of you start to laugh again. "No matter how many pancakes of mine you steal, I'll still love your thieving ass."

"That's all I ask, baby" he says, cutely scrunching his nose at you.

"You are such a goober," you sigh happily as he encompasses you in another hug, making you feel so content and so in love.

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ddoxhan · 2 years

Text

brave

slowly but surely, as I find myself by your side.

word count : 0.9k words

genre : fluff, slight angst; yizhuo being the greatest gift in your life but you're not sure whether she feels the same; gn!reader

tw : none :)

status : one-shot; pt 1/2; part 2

a/n : 'extraordinary attorney woo' made me feel the excitement for a drama in a long time. the osts are top tier in their own way so here's one that i particularly love :3 enjoy !!

you never knew why or even when everything started. one day came and changed the way you looked at yizhuo, just like that. sometimes you'd wonder how your life would have turned out if you haven't met her. would it have been miserable? would you have friends considering how closed-off you were when it came to new people? sometimes, just sometimes, you'd wonder if you'd still be alive today if it weren't for her?

"hey, you're spacing out again. hit me up, i'm all ears."

you didn't notice how you drifted off into your thoughts again as you and yizhuo sat across each other during lunch.

"sorry, it's nothing much."

"if you say so."

yizhuo glances at you again before digging into her favourite rice noodles. although she was worried about what you had in mind, she couldn't ignore the greatest dish in the world disguised as a plain looking bowl of noodle soup. her words, not yours. not being able to contain a small smile, you followed suit as you two ate in silence.

to be specific, for a minute only, because you and her can never stop talking to each other regardless of where you are. you could be listening to a speech by the director, yet there you are whispering lame jokes to yizhuo, closely failing to contain her loud laughters.

another time almost had you on the professor's blacklist as yizhuo decided to make impressions of her at the back of the hall. you tried your best to to stay calm but snickers left your lips every now and then, making the professor annoyed with the disturbance in her class. just as she turned back again to face the board, a loud smack echoed across the hall as you tried to stop her from making you laugh (as well as cry from laughing too much).

the old lady was reaching her limit so she kindly asked for the culprits to turn themselves in, in other words, fail your subject as she will not be giving good grades for your work. the two of you exchanged glances because this professor would definitely not back down easily. you were panicking but yizhuo on the other hand was not fazed at all.

no way you were going to admit that it was you two since it was your grades on the line and you were definitely not repeating law and society. but it seems that your dear friend had other ideas in mind, when she raised her hand, catching the professor's attention.

"ma'am, it was me. i would like to apologize."

"well, ms. ning. not quite the person i expected."

"it was unintentional as i couldn't help but laugh at this cutie here."

you couldn't understand what she meant by 'this cutie', before she ducked down the table, pulling out a kitten. a kitten? where on earth did she get a kitten in the middle of a lecture hall?

"oh my god! what is daisy doing here!"

the professor ran towards your row as she picked the kitten up and walking towards the front.

"you're a lifesaver, ms. ning. i'm so glad it was you she ran into, if it were someone else, i would have lost her."

apparently, the professor brought her kitten to her office but somehow, it wandered off into a lecture hall which happened to be yours. and yizhuo felt something walk across her boots, before noticing that it was a baby kitten.

"how did you know that would work?"

"well, she's an old lady who happens to be a cat lover? even better that the kitten was hers."

"you're unbelievable."

"you're welcome for saving your ass, yes."

"come on, i think you deserve more than just a thank you."

"ice cream! mint choco!"

her eyes sparkled as she ran across the corridor after class. you swore she had stars in her eyes and you'd protect her no matter what. but at that moment, you would have to buy her all the ice cream she wants for saving you from retaking the subject.

snapping back into reality, yizhuo had dragged you along to your favourite ice cream shop coincidentally, the same one you brought her to after the kitten event. but before you could even indulge in your cookies 'n cream, chenle had the nerves to ruin your day. by flirting with her, in front of your ice cream.

"chenle, don't you have class now?"

"oh yeah! I'll see you around, yizhuo!"

with that, the said man dashed for the front door as you threw daggers at him with your eyes. being the social butterfly, she waved back before taking a scoop of her ice cream.

she noticed that you still had your eyes on chenle, frowning at your lack of attention on the ice cream (and her).

"hey, your ice cream's melting."

you still had your fiery eyes on and the crease on your forehead, not too evident but not ignored by yizhuo. she places her finger on it, rubbing it as to loosen them up as well as whatever you were feeling then.

"stop frowning or you're gonna get wrinkles."

"sorry, just.. never mind."

she didn't query any further since you didn't want to tell her. another reason why she has your heart, she never forced you to talk about what you didn't want to but would not let you pent up your feelings. it was difficult for you to express but she works her magic on you.

and you would give her the world just to be the one to witness her magic forever by her side.

#ningning #ning yizhuo #winter #kim minjeong #aespa #aespa fluff #aespa angst #aespa imagines #aespa scenarios #aespa x reader #ningning x reader #feat chenle #nct #nct dream #Spotify

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mrsaguapapi · 1 year

Text

Ch 1 Ch 2 Ch 3 Ch 4 Ch 5 Ch 6 Ch 7 Ch 8 Ch 9 Ch 10 Ch 11

Chapter 12

Declarations

The Vibe:

Boy

I'm kinda freaking out. Like, full-blown panic. It's almost time to pick up Namor, I spent the day stress-cleaning the apartment and shopping for snacks and ingredients for dinner; I'm making stir fry with sauteed shrimp on the side (in case he doesn't eat meat 😬). I don't know why I'm so nervous about him being here, I feel like this is kinda a big deal. I haven't been able to eat because of my nerves and Peter talked me down from canceling several times and practically forced fed me meal replacement shakes so I wouldn't fall over.

Thank god for Peter, by the way, he said he'd make himself scarce for the night and patrol the city; Fridays are busy for Spiderman. Honestly, he's been busy almost every night, I high-key think he may be seeing someone; that 'Black Cat' girl maybe? He hasn't said anything to me since telling me about her and I swear the other night he smelled like women's perfume.

I suppose he'll tell me when he's ready

I'm wearing a pair of stone-washed jeans and a navy green crop top layered with a beige extremely cropped long-sleeve turtle neck. I was going to pair it with heels but decided to throw on my white sneakers since we were just staying home. My braids are starting to look a little raggedy so I throw a bandana on to cover my loose roots. Top it off with a pair of gold hoop earrings and I'm done. I look at myself in the mirror satisfied; with my scar, I don't usually like my belly exposed but today I look good.

I put on my sling ring, and do a once over the apartment, everything looks good. Checking my phone and see it was only 7:45 pm so I decided to play on my phone and smoke a joint to help with my nerves. Opening and sitting by the window I see I have 3 more unread texts from Bucky

Fuck I never replied to him

3:22 am

I saw you read my message...

3:36 am

I just want to apologize. I've been terrible to you.

5:02 am

I coming to see you

Is he serious right now??

I begin to text him back,

7:50 pm

Bucky, stop. I have company coming over, and you will embarrass yourself, Just stay home and we can talk about this tomorrow. Have a good night.

Almost 5 minutes later he responds with 2 thumbs up.

"Girl he is something else," I say to myself while turning my phone to silent. Closing the window, I quickly go brush my teeth, then eventually open a portal inside Namors Temple. Leaving the portal open behind me, I step through and see Namor painting something new on his wall. He was wearing signature green shorts and white robes; I don't think he's noticed me here just yet.

"Táan wáaj a ts'o'oksik, in Ajaw? 'Are you ready my king?' I ask him

He turns a bit startled and smiles at me, "Where did you learn to speak my language like that? I've heard you speak it before but now you sound as if it's your native tongue."

"Yaanten in secretos. 'I have my secrets' " I laugh, "Uts ti' a wich? 'Do you like it "

"Ma'atech a cha'ik u sorprender in. 'You never cease to amaze me " he replies

I giggle and look away, "Stop it"

He's got me blushing like a high school girl.

Namor puts his brush down and has a seat at his table, "Come closer Ki'ichpan" he says raising out his hands to me

I walk up to him and place my hands in his, "You look beautiful today" he says smiling up at me

"Thank you" I smile

He then takes his hands placing them on my hips pulling me closer between his legs and places a kiss on my bare stomach and looks up at me, "I've missed you"

"I've missed you too," I say playing with his hair, "Come on" I start to pull him out of his seat, "let's go so I can cook you some dinner."

----------------------

I gave Namor a tour of the place, it's not huge; your basic 2 bedrooms, 1 bath, and a kitchen right off the living room. He was sitting at the kitchen island, watching me prepare our bowl with the stir fry, "I made some shrimp on the side if you'd like some. I wasn't sure if you ate meat."

"Absolutely" he smiles

I finish by adding a handful of shrimp to our bowls and hand him his while I sit across from him, "I hope you like it" I say, watching him try his first bite.

"I Like it," He says with a soft chuckle, "This is good, thank you"

"You're welcome" I reply.

He is giving me the warm fuzzies

We eat our dinner mostly in silence, the food was pretty good, I hadn't eaten all day and he So thoroughly enjoyed the taste. Now we find ourselves on the couch sharing a bowl of ice cream. I've easily convinced him out of his robes and am sitting in his lap, feeding us back and forth.

"I don't think I have had this much fun in a while. You're good company" I laugh

"I can say the same about you Ki'ichpan. Keep feeding me like this and I'd give you anything"

"Anything?" I ask

Oh this should be fun

I scoop the last bit of the ice cream and hold it to his mouth, "Here last bite." Namor opens his mouth and I 'Accidentally' drop the ice cream on his chest, "Oh shoot, let me get that for you" I say dipping down and licking it off his chest, "Better?" I ask

"You're playing a dangerous game Ki'ichpan. I didn't plan on taking you this early in the night." Namor warns

I spread my legs a little further on his lap and lightly grind on his dick teasing him, "What's stopping you hm?"

Namor pulls me into a fiery kiss quite literally taking my breath away. He breaks away only to kiss and bite my neck causing me to moan.

"Keep that up and you won't last the rest of the night."

Before I could reply we were interrupted by a knock at the door, "Ignore It" I say continuing our kiss.

The knocking gets a little louder, "Sounds important. Go, I can wait for you"

I nod my head and get off his lap and head to the door. I look through the peephole and see that it's Bucky.

The Vibe:

Celeste - Strange (Lyrics) | I am still me you are still you

"What the fuck" I say exasperated

"What's got you upset?" Namor says walking to me and taking my hand

"It's Bucky." I say embarrassed, "He's been messaging me since last night. He said he was coming to see me, but I didn't think he'd follow through. I also explicitly said to stay home."

Namor's eyes darken a little, "Let me take care of it."

"No, no. I can take care of it, just please wait here." I crack open the door so bucky can only see me, "Bucky what the hell?"

"I just want to talk, can I come in?" He says beginning to walk forward

Holding my hand out I make contact with his chest and firmly stop him from entering, "No Bucky, I'm serious go home. I don't want you here."

"Fine I'll say what I have to say here then," he says

I feel the door being ripped from my hand, it was Namor, he was now standing over me with one hand on the door and the other holding the frame. "Why don't you leave as she said."

Bucky clenches his jaw looking at Namor and then at me, "Really Millie?"

"Really what James? I don't owe you anything. And both of you knock it off with the alpha male behavior Okay?" I snip, "You want to talk?" I say pointing at Bucky, "Fine, 5 min, and then take the hint and go the hell home." I push him into the hallway and turn around to Namor, "Please stay here, I'll take care of it."

He looks at me, then at Bucky, and back at me, "I don't trust him." He says pretty loudly.

"Hey man, why don't you go back inside and mind your damn business." Bucky scoffs

"Will you just be quiet, please?" I yell to Bucky. Looking at Namor, "You don't have to trust him. Trust ME when I say I'll be fine." He looks at me and nods, walking away and closing the door behind him.

He's very upset

I let out a sigh of frustration and turn to look at Bucky, "Dude what's the matter with you? You're giving me whiplash. You break up with me because what? You think I could do better, but when I start to move on you want me? I don't understand you."

He brushes his hand through his hair, "I still love you."

"Well I'm sorry but it will pass," I say half hysterical

"Do you not love me anymore?" He asks

"What does it matter? Bucky YOU left me." I Yell

"It matters!" He yells back

"WHY?"

Before I knew it he was kissing me; I wanted to stop him and fight back but my body betrayed me. The kiss was desperate and full of desire. I instinctively wrapped my arms around his neck as he held me tight in his arms pushing me back into my door making a loud thud. The noise brought me back down to Earth,

What am I doing?

"Stop" he continues to kiss me, "STOP" I push him off trying to catch my breath.

Finally, he begins to answer my questions, "It matters because if you still love me, then we have a chance. If you don't I will stop and move on" he begins to walk away, "Call me later when you're ready to talk"

Fuck...

I catch my breath and gather my barrings before I open the door and come back inside. Namor was standing there by the door waiting for me. His face and body language were unreadable, I don't know where his head is at. His energy is a bit alarming I can't tell if he wants to yell at me or jump my bones, or both.

Uncomfortable with the vibe, I take a step back putting my hands in my back pockets, "Hey..." I say "Did you hear-" I try to continue

"Everything," he says softly. He was looking me in my eyes like he was reading my mind searching for something. Finally, he speaks up, "Do you love him?"

I feel myself about to cry, twice tonight my body fails. I look down so he can't see my eyes filling with tears, "I don't want to..." I say softly.

Walking towards me, he gently lifts my head, pulling me into his gaze, "It's okay." he softly says pulling me into a hug. I was fully expecting him to yell and be angry with me but he surprised me with his compassion. "Love is a library of confusion. It's complicated, I can understand that."

"I'm sorry," I say embracing him back.

"Nothing to be sorry for. Millaenyia," He calls to me. I look up, " In case I haven't made it abundantly clear already, my heart burns for you. I want you to be mine, and I to be yours. You may not love me now, that's fine because I can wait until you do; whatever our souls are made of, yours and mine are the same" he kisses me. Unlike my kiss with bucky, this one was calming and gentle, he let me lead. Just before I can lose myself in this kiss he pulls away, "I can smell him on you."

"I'm sorry... I don't know what to say"

What can I say in this scenario? How can you remedy an impossible situation like this? He thinks our souls are one of the same. I can't deny at this point that I still love Bucky, but with that being said I'm developing feelings for Namor. Fast and Hard. What do I do? Everything is complicated right now.

"Millaenyia?"

"Hmm?" I say focusing back in on Namor

"Where did you go just now?"

"In my head"

"What are you thinking about?"

"That I am confused." I half chuckle and half cry, "I don't know I guess I'm overwhelmed." I place my hand on his face, "I appreciate your words, you've been extremely accommodating of my feelings. I just need a little time to think and gather my thoughts before I respond to your beautiful words. I don't like jumping into things half cocked and if I'm going to be with you, I want to BE with you. Does that make sense?"

"I understand, take your time" he nods, "In the meantime, while I'm here with you, can we forget about everything and just enjoy each other's company?" He smiles

The Vibe:

Doja Cat - Freak (Audio)

Smiling back at him, "What did you have in mind?"

"I was hoping I could get that smell off of you and replace it with something more," he looks me up and down, undressing me with his eyes, "pleasant"

"I could go for something pleasant" I smile grabbing the top of his shorts and pulling him closer to me, "Ba'axten ma' ka pitik a ka pitik hmm? 'Why don't you take these off hmm?' "

"Teeche' yáax 'you first' " he challenges me

I have been waiting for this moment hehe

Tonight I decided to spice it up a bit and wear a white crochet lace garter lingerie set. I take my time peeling off my top layers one by one, slowly revealing my snug bralette. Namor couldn't help himself and reached his hand out to touch me but before he could, I smacked him, "Le taj muk'óolal jach amarga, ba'ale' u yich ch'ujuk 'Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet" I wink at him and begin to unzip my pants and drop them. Stepping out of them I stand dangerously close to him and whisper in his ear, "U a Cha' paax in ajawo 'You're permitted to touch my king' "

He abruptly picks me up which startles me, causing us both to laugh; he leads me to my bedroom closing the door behind him. Namor puts me down on the bed and steps back to take his shorts off exposing his erection. Unable to help myself I slide off the bed falling to my knees in front of him. Being face-to-face with his dick is quite a daunting experience, he's the biggest I've been with so I'm a little intimidated. When I look up though, I see Namor watching me, waiting in anticipation; just the thought of him at my mercy immediately washed away any anxiety that I had.

With a sudden rush of confidence, I take his cock in my hand and begin to slowly stroke him and eventually take him in my mouth. I started slow, taking him further and further with each bop of my head sneaking occasional looks up at him, watching his reactions.

I can tell he's holding back like he needs more, so I snaked my hand up his leg, lingering a bit on his ass, and eventually grabbing his hand and placing it on the back of my head, silently permitting him to let loose. He takes the hint and begins to take control, slowly face fucking me, going deep and deeper with each thrust.

"Fuck you're so beautiful like this," he says now grabbing my head with both hands fully losing control, grunting and moaning with every other thrust. Namor was hitting the back of my throat now causing me to gag a bit, and making me tear up. I'd never fucked like this before, it was intense, and the heartbeat in my pussy grew more feverish as Namor came closer to his climax. I look up at him making eye contact as I take my free hand and begin to touch myself, wanting to feel just as good as he does.

Watching me do this lewd act was all he needed to reach his climax; he began to pull out not sure if he should finish in my mouth but I held him in place. Namor gratefully takes the opportunity and begins to grunt through his teeth and say words that I couldn't understand, losing himself entirely as I take every last drop of him down my throat.

After collecting his breath he slowly pulls out of my mouth and wipes away some of his cum from my lips, "You mystify me," He says helping me up and kissing me.

Slowly he starts to walk me back to the bed and gently lays me down kissing me as he works his way down to my panties.

"My turn to take care of you Ki'ichpan." He says as he hooks my panties; pulling them down.

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the-official-account · 11 months

Text

Edils instant ramen adventure #2: Nongshim Gourmet spicy

Because linking these together makes for better future reference.

So I've had this ramen before, and yeah, it is spicy. When I was previously desensitized to it I stopped crying every time I ate it but I can't say I expect that same mercy today. Out of the eight remaining flavors, I chose this one because @powerwordcum recommended a specific way to prepare it that I'd like to try and write about later but first I need to have a recent control taste (very official food blogged business, you understand).

Today I am deadass too lazy to fry any eggs.

Anyway, the preparation for this is simple, it just takes and extraordinary 7 minutes I'm the microwave (really nothing from someone who occasionally likes my maruchan cooked for 12. Usually I don't admit this without being waterboarded, because people react with horror. But for sciences sake)

Upon leaving the microwave, my ramen was dry as fuck because I am a filthy American who has no close what the 700 ml reccomend on the label estimates so and I want about to look it up. Science

I put some more water in

Stirred and ate!

I noticed that the noodles are semi translucent, making me think they've absorbed some of the soup broth, but I find myself underwhelmed by the flavor when I taste it. While not at all tasing bad, I wouldn't say this tasted strongly in its own right. The noodles are still nicely sheet, however, and pretty thick without being too much so.

I noticed many of the rehydrated flakes (which look to be seaweed and mushroom pieces) stick stubbornly to the edges of the bowl, and the more I eat, it seems, the less broth I have. While I am not eager to enter a chugging competition with some thirsty noodles, I will not back down from a challenge.

Spice level for the noodles is a solid medium-low burn around the tongue, my lips feel pretty normal despite my horse-like slurping. I did get a random throat punch of spice, but that doesn't seem consistent. It's also worth noting that the spice does build if as you continue to eat, and is exacerbated by the warmth of the noodles themselves. Not for the faint of tolerance.

Sipping the broth does not immediately warrant a cough, and it DOES make me want to go back for a second sip, even a third. It's got a richness to it that might be a meat/bone broth I'm the base that I appreciate, and I would go back to drink it.

While craveable for it's spice and broth, I find myself frustrated with the flakes, who's only purpose seem to be adding something to get dried on in the dishwasher if you aren't careful. I'd even go as far as saying the mushroom tastes actively bad. And I like mushroom!

The sodium level is high, but not as high as the Jongga kimchi. However, the Shin ramen doesn't have the variety of flavor offered by the acidic kimchi, that make the Jongga ramen superior for the sensory variety. Also, I feel decently full after eating these noodles! It's not a particularly large portion, but it wasn't meager either.

I would call the Shin and Jongga ramen equals, with strengths and weaknesses in different areas, placing the Shin ramen at a 7/10. I'm not really eating for cooking time, but its worth knowing that although the Jongga ramen has a deceptive 3 minute wait, one should factor in the time it takes to bring the water to a boil, so both ramens cook at approximately the same speed.

Now for that other people are saying:

We asked expert witness @powerwordcum for his opinion on these noodles. Here's what he had to say

Ive only had the spicy kind, but its p good, a little high on my spice tolerance but still tolerable. Noodles soft but not *crumbly* like maurachen. What I like to do is give it two fried eggs, stir some mayo into the water * PRE POWDER * and put some green onions

We'll follow up on his recipe, the next time we get green onions from the store (they spoil like a bitch, though!)

Amazon reviews show Shin ramen to be a very popular brand. Many recommenders offer only praises, especially highlighting the texture of the ramen. One recommends draining the broth to get a spicier noodle (heresy) and another recommend adding a bone broth to make up for the Gourmet Spicy's lack of flavor in comparison to some of Shin's other flavors, which does make me curious about comparing some of those. (Another uses half the spice packet and half chicken bullion for a less spicy, similar effect)

The abundance of complimentary recipes does give this ramen an advantage, and being able to find an abundance of ways to mix it up is something people on the fence might like to know. However, we don't give Popularity points in my house.

Notable reviews include those titled "might be poisonous"!

While no one seems willing to SELL a child for this ramen, it does seem incredibly popular among spicy tolerant kids and teens. The price fluctuates, though mine were roughly 2 bucks per bowl, which i'd day is reasonable.

Without much new information in the mix, I'd say this one continues to sit at a solid 7/10.

#lush's instant ramem adventure #shin gourmet spicy by nongshim #jason tag #lush chats

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ghostlygreyroses · 2 years

Text

Thought i would give a visual as to what you will be eating in this fluffy fanfic

Aether (ghoul) × reader

Always gender neutral

Yawning and rubbing my eyes i checked the clock on my bedside table, it read 2:03am. "Jeez.." i said sleepily while looking at the stained glass windows in my room, removing myself from the comfort of my bed i shove on my slippers and head down the stairs following the candlelit lanterns along the stairwell.

A slight creek could be heard every now and then as i headed to the kitchen to get myself a glass of water.

As soon as i walked into the kitchen a saw the fruit bowl displayed on the counter i could both hear and feel my stomach growling, sighing i walked up to the counter and grab an apple as i settle on one of the stools.

after a few bites i could hear someone walking down the stairs, i stilled for a moment with an unchewed piece of apple still in my mouth quietly listening to the footsteps.

I then recognized it was non other then aether, personally he's my favorite ghoul but ill never tell him that.

Rubbing his eyes as he walks in waving at me and grabbing a banana sitting next me shortly after. "What are you doing up this late?" He asked with a groggy voice, " real question is what are you doing up this late" i replied quietly laughing at myself.

"Very true, i guess im down here for the same reason you are" he said Grinning.

Just as he started peeling the banana i ripped off the stupid sticker they always put on fruit and stuck it on his forehead because im too lazy to get up and put in the garbage.

He looked at me with a confused expression on his face, as he went to touch his forehead. I'm guessing he didn't quite notice what exactly i put on his forehead, I giggled at this.

Once he took off the sticker on his forehead and looked at it his face flushed slightly from what i assume was embarrassment.

We both eat our quick snack and agreed we wanted more then just fruit so i took out some ingredients to make chocolate chip cookies and got to work.

As we started to form them and place them on the baking sheet i decided to shape them into a penis instead because circles are boring and not original, as i placed the newly formed penis on the sheet i could see aether trying to hide his laugh.

Placing the pan into the oven aether turned on the oven light and we both sat on the floor and watched the cookies rise.

Resting my head on his shoulder, he placed his hand on my thigh which i found kinda odd but enjoyed it nonetheless. We both waited what felt like a century but finally After about 15 minutes the timer went off and we took them out frowning as we remembered we had to let them cool.

About 5 minutes went by and we got impatient so aether poured us both a glass of milk but i insisted on sharing on glass of milk instead because it felt romantic.

We sat back on the stools dipping our cookies in our shared glass of milk and then eventually aether took a sip of the milk to wash down all the cookies he ate and i saw this as an opportunity for an indirect kiss so i also took a sip.

Right before i was about to leave for bed realizing it was now about 3am, aether got up from his stool, kissed my kissed my lips and said "nighty night love" nonchalantly, i looked at him puzzled and blushing, "why did you kiss me and call me love?" I questioned him.

All he did was laugh and say " are you so tired you forgot we're dating, you're so cute" he said holding my face and walking up the stairs.

Completely dumbfounded I walked up the stairs confused, right as i walked up to my bedroom door i remembered that he took me out for a dinner date last evening.

Face palming i shamefully walk into aethers room and crawl into his bed.

#aether ghoul #ghost b.c.#fluff #fanfic

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iwannaban0nym0us · 8 months

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so according to my friends my life is a romcom (which means the past 2 days have been a lot because it doesn't actually feel like a comedy when you're living it)

btw i'm exhausted and posting this in a half done state because i just need to put this out into the world and i may or may not come back to edit this into like actual coherent thoughts

like 5 6 hours of sleep

good morning text

felt like i was gonna throw up while eating breakfast

first ones at school

on the same bus

talked while explantion and intro stuff

kept canoeing by each other

game them my 3d printed snake

spent all of lunch together

pushed their boat off

i dropped my phone, felt like shit

we got back they were swimming i called my parents

i went over to ask for the snake back, still on the brink of tears, they didn't know where the snake was, them and another friend gave me a hug

they pulled me away from everyone and we talked, and i cried, i don't cry, esp not in front of people, they knew exactly what i needed, "you're not allowed to be worried about me when you're literally crying"

we went to get changed and then we played games

they found my snake and gave it to me and apologized for a stupid joke their (but kinda my) friend made about it and losing things

i did some kinda stupid stuff

some people who i kinda know in the grade asked me how i was doing so ok about losing my phone, at some point i mentioned to M that it was because to be ok about it i had to pretend it was ok and joke about it and like fake it till i make it

they told me that my asshole ex has no idea they hurt me

we acted like we used to and there was a soccer ball

they joked about seeing my cry (which was then corrected to seeing me be emotionally vulnerable) being something on their bucket list

we explored a bit, climbed a tree, at one point they wandered off and i followed after and i paused at the edge of the clearing and just really whished i had my phone because they just looked so pretty slowly walking through and just everything about the moment i was kinda frozen for a minute or 2 and then they turned around

us and friends ate blackberries

my friend confronted me about wtf is going on with me and M and told me to stop flirting with them

there was a campfire and i was so exhausted the guides talked for a while, at one point a friend came up to me and we talked about M and he said i should talk to them (later i found out that friend and the friend who confronted me were considering making a bet on us getting back together by the end of september, so uh wtf)

me and 2 friends slept outside and i told them everything and i knew that i had to talk to M and tell them that i can't deal with the in between anymore and i'm being too logical about everything and it's a stupid situation that's complicated and i hate emotions

i didn't sleep awful but i also got <7 hours of sleep, but the stars were pretty

i choked down a bowl of cereal for breakfast but couldn't get myself to eat any sausage or pancakes

i just kinda hovered around M for a while and kept trying to find the right time to talk to them because i wanted to make sure they were awake enough and ate breakfast and packed enough

i help some people pack up their tents i packed up my tent

eventually when (according to what the teachers had said) we only had 15min left and M me and another friend were talking to guide i pulled M aside and asked to talk to them and as we were walking away from the group i asked if they were up for a serious conversation and they wanted to say no because they had one w/ another friend last night but they ended up saying yes

we talked for a whole hour,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, and the conversation still isn't really over

"i loved you"

i felt like i was gonna throw up

both of us talked to a mutual friend

we're both such logical people and want to know why their feelings changed but neither of us can figure it out

we're both so bad about pretending everything is ok and just convincing ourselves and others of that

they cried, like really cried

they told me that i'm a hard person to get over

apperntly i really didn't do anything wrong

they also had a really rough summer and wanted to reach out

we were both so terrified to see each other in person again

we both had a so much fun yesterday

we were both trying to follow the other's lead and that just spiraled

we don't know how to exist as friends

they told me at least 3 times that they still think they made the right decision to break up with me

i mentioned the breakeven line ("what am i supposed to do when the best part of me was always you") that they had as their status and they were like 'oh shit you saw that' and confirmed that it was about me

when we went back to school we both just pretended that everything was ok, and apperently they were also doing that over the summer while i was trying to feel things and then convicing myself that i was over them

neither of us has ever been through anything like this before and we're just kinda lost

i told them several times how much i trust them

we both really care about each other and neither of us wants what we have to go away

they didn't realize that i don't have a therapist and that led to them telling me how strong i am for making it through everything i did with my asshole ex and i told them that i don't feel strong and they said strong people never do

they know that they hurt me and they're sorry about that but also i can so how much pain they're in too and i can't be mad at them

we both wish that one of us was an asshole so this would be easier, or at least that i had fucked up in some way so that there was a reason for this

we both just kinda knew that if we made it through the summer we would be ok

they're just really really glad to be talking to me again

they feel like they're never going to be able to have a solid romantic realtionship, and idk the words for this one are hard, but like basically if what we had which felt so good and real fell apart then what kind of romantic hope do they have, and i didn't have anything to say to that other than they didn't lose me, and just for me in general that felt good to hear because it meant that they weren't lying when they told me that night that they had never felt like this before

we're gonna try and keep having conversations like this on a semi-regular basis because we still haven't figured out how to exist with each other and that conversation was something we both desperately needed, but also wouldn't have worked if it had happened sooner

i filled my friends in on the conversation and i could see that M was doing the same, and obviously we couldn't tell them everything because the conversation we had was just so long

and we wrapped up the conversation as we were shifting to the next thing and before we broke off into our groups they gave me a good solid hug

then we had some time with advisories, that then morphed into chill time for a little i ended up lying in the sun by M and their friend and one of my friend's boyfriend and then somehow i ended up w/ M's headphones on and they were queuing up music for me to get a sense of their music taste

then we sat in a reflection circle w/ the whole group (i was still listening to their music)

and then after that we went to grab lunches and i lost track of them and then i found them and they were kinda frazzled and looking for a mutual friend of ours and i could smth was going on and what ended up happening is them giving me their phone (so the music would keep playing) while they went to find the friend and idk what happened but i hope it all worked out

i wasn't able to eat lunch, i just like couldn't make myself do it, i did drink a caprisun and eat like 3 marshmallows tho and i talked to a friend for a bit and we were both going through it

then we had a 2 hour bus ride and i just listened to an audio book on my kindle and like half fell asleep and I looked back at M a few times esp when we went over the bridges because i know they don't like bridges

and then we got back to school and i said hi to a few freshmen i know who had gotten back at a similar time and had like one more conversation with a friend and one more with M and then i went home

and i haven't really done anything this evening and i wasn't able to make myself eat anything for lunch/snack (unless you count a singular pack of fruit snacks) but i did a reasonable amount for dinner

oh and btw one of my closet friends didn't end up going on the trip and has a non apple phone (plus just doesn't check messages often) so i can't fill them in on anything until tuesday

i still kinda feel like i'm gonna throw up (no where near as bad as when we were talking tho, because i was like convinced i was gonna throw up then) and that combined w/ the not eating much thing is scaring me

anyway it's 11:15 now and last night i got 6.5 hours of sleep and the night before i got <6 hours of sleep plus like all of that happened so i'm worn out gonna try and sleep now, sorry about the disaster that is this post

#me #friends #ex girlfriend #M #ex grayfriend #ex #personal #school

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dzpenumbra · 9 months

Text

7/28/23

Alright. 3AM and here I am. I got a full night's sleep last night. Waking up and seeing the afternoon light was a relief. I'm hoping that will soon be... a thing of the past.

Let me elaborate. I had therapy today. I timed the start of my day so that I didn't do yoga or anything before therapy, I actually pretty much started my day with it. I did dishes and broke out my brand new teapot to make a pot of jasmine tea. I thawed some frozen strawberries - this bag unfortunately was not a great batch. I ate a bowl of cereal and played Mini Motorways for a bit. But the big thing was... I started my day with therapy.

The teapot... was a bit of a mistake, to be honest. Not in getting it, it will be a perfect addition when I finally do literally anything social in-person at my house. Something I had given up on ages ago in the past. But... what noticed today was that... just drinking two cups of tea was... too much. I got too much caffeine in my system from just two cups of tea. How fucking crazy is that. After only a couple days of not even a cold-turkey caffeine detox, just cutting down from a pot of black coffee to one cup of tea. The difference was staggering. I guarantee 2 weeks ago I could've drank the entire pot of tea and barely felt anything.

So, that's a thing I need to be mindful of. I made a point to go into therapy without a plan today. I was curious to see what would come out of it naturally. Unsurprisingly, some stuff from my journal entry last night about my social anxiety and panic and its origins/maturation and all that came up. But a surprising amount of stuff about... sleep. My lack of sleep, sleep interruption, my sleep schedule, what I've historically done about sleep. He made sure to be very delicate about it, but was urging me to try to bring my sleep schedule back a bit. And honestly, I want to. I genuinely don't know what's holding me back.

I say this at 3AM. 3AM is a very normal time for me to be awake. I just spent like 15 minutes in my kitchen cleaning my stove and washing dishes, and I had to actively stop myself. These late-night/early morning hours are very unique, hours that the layman rarely sees at any point in their life. Fucking think about that, how weird is that? The average person, in fact... the vast majority of people... can go their whole lives and only see between 2-4AM a handful of times. On super rare occasions, like being sick or having nightmares or if they have an infant child that needs care, or in extreme emergencies, or a super quick bathroom sprint. And I've seen that entire stretch from midnight to dawn every fucking day for well over 4 years. Every day. It's where almost every one of these journal entries was written, it's where a lot of my artwork has been made.

So... why? Why? XD Why do I sleep during the day... and stay up until dawn? I. Don't. Know.

I legit asked my therapist directly to please help me explore this next week. I honestly don't know. I'm struggling to connect the dots. Is this a thing like, "well, I just drink caffeine, don't ask me why... it's just what I do"? Is it because it's insanely quiet and still - like just the sounds of the occasional cricket or the rare nocturnal hunt? Is it because everyone else is asleep, and I'm... avoiding them? Meaning like... I finally have the world to myself and won't be bothered? ... I don't know, because I really don't have the world to myself... I have to be super quiet during the night. It's one thing to be loud and shit during the day... it's a whole other ball-game to disturb your neighbors at 3AM. Am I afraid of going to sleep in the dark? Genuinely unsure on that one. I don't really feel like I am. And I have night lights... I think it might just be... unfamiliar. Like working out was.

Here's an interesting thought I had earlier... am I sleeping during the day because that's when people aren't in the building? ... Like... everyone is away during the day, at their jobs or school or whatever. So... that's the time when the building is the emptiest. Can I like... sense (subconsciously) the presence of this many people in close proximity to me? And like... maybe when I'm sleeping, do I feel safer when I'm around less people? It's an interesting angle, but I don't know.

Or is it really not this complicated. I really think it might be as simple as... I'm just not used to sleeping at night. And I really have no dire need to be awake at a certain hour... Though it would be convenient, I would have plenty of time to skate, without having to rush. I could take day trips to the lake or the beach or go explore weird hippie shops and shit. I could go on adventures. I could go be out in the world! But when am I going to do 4-hours straight of painting? How do I fit that into my day, too?

Yeah, maybe there isn't some big subconscious reasoning. Maybe it's just... what I got used to. Maybe dawn is the only marker because... its the only timekeeper I listen to. When I see 4AM, it doesn't mean much to me. When I see the sun coming up, I go... "oh shit, yeah, I gotta wrap it up." I guess kinda like what sunset is for a lot of people.

So yeah, maybe this is just a matter of habit. Just a super big and super broad habit.

I had to remind myself today that in 2019, I was living in a house with 11 other people. I was sharing a room, first with one other person almost 10 years older than me, then with 2 people 10 years younger. It was super alien and uncomfortable and I struggled with it a lot, but I managed to make it work enough to function and adjusted surprisingly quickly. I had some sleep struggles there, but only because I was staying up until 2AM. That's peanuts compared to what I'm doing now. Back then, I was waking up at around 8 or 9 so I could make a 10AM appointment 2 times a week. But I was steadily waking up in AM. And that was not that long ago... it was only... 4... years ago... Damn, the pandemic really fucked up time, didn't it.

So... I guess a lot of my big dramatic problems are... still residual pandemic problems. Scared to be in close proximity to other people, and kinda masking that as... don't want to be "overwhelmed emotionally"... or "don't want to involuntarily do something to offend people". Maybe my panic brain is bringing that shit out because it knows I'll listen. When really... it's "I don't want to get sick and die." Because... people just don't talk about the virus anymore, like it just doesn't fucking exist. Like it just went away. And I don't have social interactions, so... I'm kinda... frozen in time? And I never evolved new social habits because... I don't have anyone else built in to practice with. So... I guess I'm kinda still in quarantine, kinda?

I mean... I'm vaccinated so I don't really know what I'm worried about. I'm just... I haven't really been to any kind of in-person thing involving more than just family members in almost 4 years. I've been to doctors, I've been to therapy, I've gone to dinner with family. I don't know, I haven't like... hung out with a group of people since before the pandemic. And it's super alien, and... that same word keeps coming up over and over and over - overwhelming. The idea of it is overwhelming. But I crave it so much. And it's essential for my personal and professional growth.

I used to go to concerts at small venues where you'd just be packed in there like sardines, feeling the energy of the crowd. Now? No way in hell I'd do that. I might stand on the side by the wall and listen to the music... Huh... Maybe this is pandemic shit.

I've been trying to put this in context of why I have been skipping and kinda avoiding... excusing myself... from going to these regular live model drawing sessions at the art collective a block away from my apartment. I've known about and missed 2 drawing sessions and a small concert to raise money for flood victims. Let me just uncork the old noggin real quick and unload all the reasons I came up with to not go. So I can hear how exaggerated (I wanted to say "stupid" but I'm really trying not to beat myself up so much) they are.

I didn't want to go because I haven't done figure drawing, let alone figure drawing from life... in a very long time. Like... since college. I did some figure drawing studies in 2020 and 2021, from photographs. I haven't done figure drawing from life since college. And... yeah, honestly? I think that's the big bad one. I'm a tiny bit self-conscious about how I smell because I stopped wearing deodorant like 6 years ago, it kept fucking with my skin and I don't like the idea of putting weird chemicals into my skin when I don't really know what effects they'll have, especially for cosmetic purposes. But I'm really not that concerned about that one, I mean... if I'm wearing beads and hemp jewelry, you can expect a little B.O. and you can get the fuck over yourself, you stink too. We all do. And I make sure I shower and perfume very soon before being around people, so I really don't think that's an issue, it's never been brought to my attention as being a big one. I am a bit self-conscious about my skin condition. It's like acne, but all over my scalp to varying degrees, in addition to some face acne. I have been self-conscious about this for a while. But I just can't bring myself to wear a hat to hide it. I just can't allow myself that crutch, it feels like giving a loaded gun to my shame. And I've been going out regularly and honestly, once I get out there I really don't think about it. On my last walk, I had mosquitos fucking gravitating towards them because they're like radar beacons of heat, but I passed by several people and the insecurity really didn't linger in my head more than a fleeting thought. If someone's going to judge me for something I can't help, when I can't even get a doctor's appointment until December? They can fuck off. I've been a little afraid that I might... be socially awkward? From just... lack of practice... But my therapy sessions prove that completely wrong... and my interactions with the girl who works for the building and the maintenance guy prove that wrong. And streaming does too. And my passing body-language interactions with people in the world prove that wrong. I'm just... kinda in my own world out there. But not in an anti-social way. In the way that a 7 year old is in their own world, because they're just utterly fascinated by the shape of these leaves over here... or this rock they found... but if you approach them, they're cool with chatting. Hell, they'll tell you all about it! So... I'm not so much insecure about my ability to communicate... I'm just worried that I won't make the most out of the opportunity. That I will meet some people but... not connect, not have it turn into friends. Because I'm too passive. I don't know.

So... of all of that... I think the insecurity about my drawing ability... and my insecurity with being too passive and just sorta... being at the school dance but standing on the sidelines and waiting for someone to approach me? Because I'm a bit shy...? Those are the big ones. The others are kinda just fleeting thoughts. How to address this? If I make figure drawing an anatomical study... or a study of breaking down the body into simple interrelated shapes... I could go on, you get what I mean? If I make this a study... rather than... I'm here to show these people my chops... as though I have to... impress them or something? First impression moments, man... that's gotta be what this is. Ugh... But yeah, if I focus on treating this as an opportunity to learn about anatomical structures... like trying to draw the person's skeleton rather than their skin... or their muscle structures in certain parts of their body that are flexed or rotated when they're in specific poses. Or just breaking down complex forms into simpler shapes so I can sorta... develop gestural shortcuts for future figure drawing... Then this can be sort of an... autodidactic class. A class where I'm teaching myself. Not just me showing up and being this incredibly talented artist and drawing the person and then people look at it and go "wow, that's really good" and I get embarrassed and proud at the same time. Good lord, engaging with these anxieties is so fucking important, this paragraph has turned me completely 180 on this. I absolutely can see the value in going to that drawing session now, it's worth well more than $15 for 2 hours. Plus, I get to potentially meet new people.

See... that's what I did. I put too much emphasis on meeting new people and making a good impression. If I have a secondary goal... I can come out of there with a win no matter what. Not that it's winning or losing... but I hope you know what I mean. If I go there with the exclusive goal of making new friends... there's a good chance that even if it goes well, I might not make a new best friend. And that puts a ton of invisible pressure on myself and on other people, that they're not even aware of. I really should be going for the experience. And make an effort to socialize. But really... just get an experience.

Goddamn. I'm just like... the concept of walking up to a stranger, or a group of strangers, at a trivia night at a bar? That shit is so fucking alien to me right now. I just immediately get a huge reflex that just starts laughing at the absurdity of that. Me. Walking up to a beautiful woman at a bar and asking to buy her a drink. XD Right... I'm in the corner booth sitting crosslegged on the bench seat drawing zentangles on a coaster. That's the character I am. I don't like being that forward. It makes me uncomfortable.

And yet... I rely on others to be that forward... Figure that one out... XD

I'm just gonna explore this one before I turn in, I really want to get a shower in before I go to bed. The time before last at the skatepark, a kid came by. I say kid, he was probably in his early 20's. He was on the other side of the park the entire time. I had headphones in, he had headphones in. He stayed on his side of the park, I stayed on mine. (To be fair, the only obstacles I wanted to skate were on the side I was on.) We didn't speak the entire time. We barely made eye contact. Can I... challenge myself... next time I'm at the skatepark... to go up to someone specifically for the purpose of saying hi? To introduce myself? I mean, I wave to passersby a lot. I smile a ton. I feel like I'm approachable enough. I wonder if I could challenge myself, set some goals... to like... go up to strangers and introduce myself and get to know something about them. Without "being weird" about it, since that keeps popping up in my head.

I did not grow up with good role models for this. But I know how to do it. I've done it in the past. And I really need to remember this part. I have done it in the past and it did not go poorly. It's just very alien to me, and it's not something I have really identified as behavior I would do. Like sending food back at a restaurant, or returning something I bought, or getting something fixed by my landlord. They are things that I am capable of doing logistically, in action, but they are not comfortable actions. They are things I do very rarely, and they feel... risky? They feel liable to upset people. And... my compassion gets hijacked by my self-protective anxiety and goes "oh, you really shouldn't upset those people, it's not that bad." Like the creaky floorboards.

That same "protective" voice says "don't be weird and go over and bother that kid." Because a 36 year old skateboarder saying hi and introducing himself and complimenting another skateboarder is... weird... apparently... and will upset them? Okay, let me turn the tables then... if a 45 year old skateboarder came up to me and complimented me, would I think it was weird? No... I would make a new friend. I'm just... I guess this is where the trauma comes in... I'm aware now that not everyone reacts the same way. And a lot of people in my life... A LOT of people... reacted in ways that did not make sense. And my compassion... got confused, and now kinda short-circuits and struggles to read peoples' reactions properly and tries to play it safe? I guess? Like... "this could go really well, it could be just a normal everyday human interaction, or it could go really bad. Really bad is the new one, we didn't know it could go like this, but god fucking damn did we learn. So... is the benefit worth the potential cost? It is worth the risk? To upset them? To hurt them?" And the answer comes out to be... "play it safe, avoid. Just smile from a distance and let them make the first move."

You know what they say. All great things come from playing it as safe as possible and not taking any risks at all. (That's sarcasm, in case you couldn't read the tone, it's actually the opposite.)

Man... Social anxiety and trauma can get so fucking weird when they mix. Weird because... the logic doesn't appear to make sense... but in the context of the narrative of my outlandish traumatic experiences... it makes a convincing enough argument to end up like this. Welp, the good news? ... Isn't that what gospel means? Good news? XD Welp, here's an excerpt from the Book of DZ for the day - I have made enough progress in developing my self-awareness to be able to detect these... hang-ups? Insecurities? Limitations? I don't even really have a good word for them. Challenges, I guess? And, more recently, I can actually... see myself performing healthier, more social actions. Well, I can see a hypothetical person doing these things. Like I can write stage directions and script a scene where a person that I would be playing would walk up and introduce himself at the skatepark. "Hey, you're really consistent with that tre flip. Is that a favorite trick of yours? Oh, my names _____ by the way." I've done it before, too. I just really wish... I felt excited to have those interactions... rather than dreading them.

Back around college graduation and the few years following, I used to do this thing I called "emotional alchemy"... where I would try to take the physical sensation of stage fright and channel it directly into excitement. Into pure, excited, "I'm pumped" excitement. I'd be back stage just like jumping around and moshing with my bandmates and putting all that adrenaline into exuberance. I have no idea where I got that idea from. But it worked.

Maybe I need to re-learn how to embrace the adrenaline. Embrace the excitement. The Ace of Cups. That's it. The Ace of fucking Cups. The gigantic burst of emotions that you get on a first date. Or a first kiss. Or your first speech in front of a crowd. Or, for the fellow recluses out there, going to the fucking grocery store. XD Or riding on a subway train or something.

This is the last thing, I promise. I mentioned this in therapy. This idea that like... what I'm dealing with are just big emotions. Intense feelings and they can get really sensory overwhelming. But it honestly hasn't been that bad recently. Walking yesterday was not bad at all. At all. Very little, if any overwhelming anxiety. I was just... joyous and childlike. But there's something about the Ace of Cups that just... throws me off. Like I'm afraid of a giant surge of ANY emotion. As though... they're bad. Because of how intense they are. Oooo oh, like how I'm kinda... if I were to find a romantic partner, I would really... need to easy my way into any form of physical contact. And I mean... even hugs. Because of how much of a fucking sensory overload it is. It makes my entire body seize up, literally. I wince. So... there's a reflexive component to this... like preparing yourself to dip into an ice-cold river. It's not going to hurt you, it's not bad... in fact, it can even be good... but it's a shock to the system. Like eating a slice of cake when you haven't eaten sugar in 5 years. Or drinking two cups of tea instead of one today. XD

So... I guess my approach here is to reassure myself that the shock to the system is not that bad, as long as you just relax and ride it out and try to just... see it as another experience. An intense life experience. And in a way, I would like to end up in a place where I am... in an odd way... grateful that I get to experience the little things in life that people all around me take so... for granted... that I get to experience these things so fully.

I go walking and I'm am constantly in awe. I think I'm the only person out in the city walking around and looking up. The architecture is very interesting and alien to me. And the lighting effects of light reflecting off brick and cast iron and other different materials. And the engineering and artistry. And so many different types of plants, in so many unique different types and growth configurations. And the constant flow of water in the river, and just picturing the currents and thinking of how long it took for the rocks to erode. And god, seeing animals is so lovely, I miss it so much and cherish it every time I get to. Birds, rabbits, beavers. I love that experience. And I really do feel blessed that I have reached a point in my personal growth to be able to genuinely appreciate and find joy in so many things. It makes every day an adventure. This overwhelm is just a byproduct of me... experiencing life with the gain turned way up. And sometimes it feels like a lot, even when it isn't bad or harmful. It's just... a lot. So... I'm trying to be self-compassionate about that limitation, but also remind myself that emotional overwhelm isn't necessarily harmful, and subsequently... doesn't necessarily need to be avoided for "personal safety".

Okay, 4:30... still gotta read this back. Not bad. Might even make it to bed before daybreak.

#diary #journal #online journal #stream of thoughts #stream of consciousness

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takeeachdayonebookatatime · 1 year

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Why did you elbow me? 95

Undercover Beckett: back home part 10

Jim: pov Katie took a nap until Dinner which is a bowl of applesauce, Katie seems to be loving it. We were eating hot dogs Castle got from across the street. I decided to head to the loft since it is getting late.

Lanie: pov Kate slept through the night only waking up a few times. Castle is getting breakfast sandwiches for me and him, Kate is eating cheerios which I'm feeding her for breakfast. After we finish eating a nurse comes over with some release forms for us to sign. The Dr mentioned Kate will have some severe headaches for a bit, he told Castle to keep the light off or low at the house and if her headache is bad give her some meds for it and in an emergency bring her right back to the hospital. The drive to the loft is short. Castle helps Kate to bed so she can take a nap. The car ride home bothered her stomach.

Jim: pov while Katie sleeps I decided to read in my room which is the guest room. I put on some nice music I like to listen to while I read and get comfortable.

Kate: pov my pounding headache and heart woke me from my nap, it's so painful I feel like crying. There is nothing I can do except yell for Castle or lay here in pain. I don't feel like shouting Castle name, which would make my headache worse.

Kate: pov After laying here for a bit, I can feel the tears running down my face. I'm tough I should not be crying, Castle eventually walks in the room to check on me saying he was writing.

Castle: pov I walk in the bedroom to find Kate awake, she seems to be crying. I ask if her head hurts or her heart and she quietly says both it's bad. I walk to the kitchen to grab a water bottle and something for her headache. Lanie follows me into the room to check on Kate and do a concussion check on her, she says her vitals aren't the best. Once she takes the meds and the heart ones Lanie Gave her, Lanie goes into the living room to make some phone calls. I carefully pick up Kate and put her on my lap so I can cuddle with her. I hope it will help with her headache. Me, Jim and Lanie ate while she was sleeping since we knew her tummy would be bad and she might not be hungry for a while. A few minutes later Kate asks if I can give her something for her headache I mentioned I just did.

Lanie: pov Kate is finally back asleep which is great. Because Kate is having short term memory issues, me and Castle have been putting her medicine somewhere she can't reach. Same with the foods/drinks she can't have. In 2 days she has a type of therapy to help her with her memory and arm issues. Tonight's dinner is vegetable noodles Jim offers to wake Kate up and help her to the dining room, Martha and Alexis just arrived home. I dim the lights in the dining room so they won't bother Kate.

Alexis: pov since her right arm is not bothering Kate she can eat without help. While we eat I talk about school and how things are going with Dave, I mention I have plans with Dave to get ice cream after dinner. Papa Jim says he and Johanna worked together 3 years before they became a couple. Papa Jim says Don't let life get in the way of dating and don't let love get in the way of your life find balance. The whole family is in the living room watching a movie. Dad had put Kate to bed a few minutes ago since her head was hurting.

Dave: pov I pull up to Alexis house and an older man opens the door saying Alexis your date is here turns out it's Kate's father making him her step grandpa. I ask how Kate is doing and a woman named Lanie says okay, her headaches are bad and she is having some issues with her heart, left arm and short term memory.

Martha: pov it has now been 2 days and Castle and Lanie are getting Kate ready for her appointment. I have an acting class in a few minutes. Alexis is already at college, Kate had suggested Jim have breakfast with an old friend this morning which he is. My son is making us an amazing breakfast.

Kate: pov Lanie is helping me shower since I have stitches on my forehead. She then helps me get dressed, the shirt says I survived a bullet to the heart. Castle bought it for me as a gift. I make sure to take my meds before I eat.

Castle: pov we all eat before we leave. I'm wearing a black shirt that says Kate's my hero with gray pants. Lanie is wearing an end gun violence shirt. The car ride to the appointment is short. At the reception desk Lanie signs Kate in for her private therapy class. A few minutes later and her name is called, the therapist is a nice looking young man. He mentions he went over her medical file. Bradley explains he usually has his patients run on a treadmill while they answer the questions since it helps with their memory but since Kate has a heart condition he is not going to risk it.

Lanie: pov we all sit on the floor since Kate is on the heart rate restriction, while he works on her left arm. He starts by bending and unbending her fingers. He says once her fingers start moving he would like to have her practice making a fist then move onto having her hold stuff in her left hand, to see if she can hold it. Bradley then asks her some questions for her to memorize. She is doing pretty good. He knows to avoid anything about her shooting.

Kate: pov therapy is going okay, he told Lanie and Castle it's okay to put stuff in my hand but make sure I can hold onto it before letting go. He gave me some homework to do. To be continued. ………

#castle #caskett #stanakatic #katebeckett #nathanfillion #richardcastle #fanfiction #tvshow

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sparklingchim · 3 years

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better together; f | pjm

pairing: jimin x wife!reader

word count: 1.9k

genre: fluff, dad!jimin, married couple, slice of life au

warnings: oc is pregnant, nothing else unless you hate children ?

summary: just a casual day with your husband jimin and your little boy jihoon.

a/n: hello! this is a fic i wrote a while ago and thought about sharing it now🥰 there are a few more chapters that i wrote in that universe but they still need to be edited. i hope you like it!!❤

masterlist

Kick...kick...kick...

,,Why are you so active today, my little bean?" you coo, rubbing your belly and feeling the tiny kicks from your 7 month old baby girl in your womb.

,,Baby?" you hear the sound of your 2 year old little baby boy, who is sitting next to you, on his high baby chair. His pastel blue elephant bib is draped around his neck, already soiled with the chicken soup rice porridge your feeding him - even though he only ate approximately 3 spoons of it yet.

,,Your baby sister is moving," you tell him and he excitedly stretches his grabby hands, aiming for your bump, completely ignoring the spoon that he was about to latch his mouth on.

Of course his short chubby arms can't quite reach it, so you grab him from his baby stool and place him on your lap. He automatically brings both his hands on your stomach, roaming them all over your bump and anticipating the movements of his baby sister.

Both of your hands have a firm hold on his back and keep him safe on your lap, because Jihoon tends to get dynamic and thrilled at random times - especially when it had something to do with his still unborn sister. Jihoon loved feeling her kicks, even going so far to refuse to sleep sometimes and clinging onto your womb to not miss anything his sister does.

,,Ohhh," his stunned voice breaks the silence, his eyes going wide as he feels his sibling moving. You laugh at his reaction, one hand pushing his soft hair from his forehead.

When you attempt to sit him back into his baby chair, he whines in displeasure, putting pressure on your stomach with his small hands. You sigh in defeat, not wanting to make him sad because you don't let him rub your belly.

For a few seconds you let him be, granting him the glee he earns from being the closest as possible as he is able to be with his sister. The way Jihoons whole focus is solely fixated on his baby sister makes your heart swell in pure fondness. He couldn't wait for her birth just like Jimin and you.

You don't forget to feed him though. You grab a spoonful of Jihoon's porridge behind him and hold the spoon in front of his lips, waiting for him to open his tiny plump lips - that he definitely got from his dad - but his eyes are remain on your bump, not caring about the food presented in front of him. You slightly raise your hips up, causing his body to bounce on your lap to draw his attention towards you - but nothing. Jihoon simply doesn't care.

,,Jihoon-ah," you scold him with a stern tone since he's obviously ignoring you.

He looks up at you, with those big brown eyes and your heart lights up at his innocent face.

You hold the spoon closer to his mouth, but still, he doesn't attempt to part his lips, only backing away with his head.

,,No," he says and pushes your hand away with his much smaller hand. You quirk an eyebrow up at his behaviour.

You don't get to berate him again, when you hear the door opening and then closing shut again. You both immediately get excited - well, your excitement isn't really shown outside compared to Jihoon, who seeks to get off your lap and eagerly wants to rush off to his dad. His feet slowly sink down to the floor with your protecting hands around his little body and then his chubby legs sprint to the hallway, desperately wanting to greet his dad.

You hope he won't fall, because that accident happened a lot of times already - always ending up with some sobbing, teary eyes and clinging onto either Jimin or you. Your little boy let his delight go too overboard sometimes and only reserved little care into his surroundings. You'd have to teach him to be more aware of that.

,,Hello little guy," you hear Jimin's voice echoing from the hall.

,,Daddy!" Jihoon exclaims, giggling afterwards because Jimin probably spooned him up and snuggled his face into Jihoon's neck.

You just sit there, a warm smile on your lips, and don't make an attempt to get up to greet your husband too, because your feet are killing you today.

A few seconds later, Jimin enters the kitchen with Jihoon in his arms. Jihoon wrapped his arms and leg around Jimin's upper body, like a little koala bear and you chuckle at that sight. Jimin tilts his head down and places a tender kiss to your lips.

Even though Jimin was only away for 3 hours - because he had some meeting at the company - you missed his presence at home. And I seems like your not the only one who missed him, since Jihoon is practically glued to his daddys body.

,,You three are good?" Jimin asks, taking a seat beside you, while rubbing your belly in soft strokes.

,,We're all fine.", you assure him with a sincere smile. Jimin kisses you again. You just look so adorable right now.

You look at the back of Jihoon's head. Jimin's hand is placed on his back to hold him closely.

,,But Jihoonie still has to eat, right?" you say and look expectantly at his back, waiting for a reaction to your words. Jimin's gaze shoot to Jihoon's - still full - bowl and frowns.

Jihoon wiggles his body and then muffles a tiny 'No' into Jimins shoulder.

Jimin chuckles but then quickly asks ,,What's the matter, baby?" He softly nudges Jihoons head with his shoulder, wanting to see his face. Jihoon looks up to his dad, his lips forming a little pout.

,,You're shirt is stained with his food.", you giggle, after seeing the mess that Jihoons bib caused on Jimin dark shirt. He peers his eyes to the stain but doesn't say anything to that. Jimin and you were already used to dirty clothes since your little boy couldn't stop creating a mess every five minutes.

,,How come you don't want to eat anymore when it seems like you apparently enjoyed it?" Jimin asks the little boy.

You sigh and stand up. Jihoon needs to eat something and if he won't continue eating this meal, then you're going to cook something else. He was already fussy when you sat him down on the baby chair earlier and you don't want to deal with whines if your going to resist on making him eat that food.

You groan slightly when your feet carries your whole body weight and instantly place your hand on your side to steady yourself. Your bump got really big.

,,No, no, baby. I've got this, sit down. I can cook something for him," Jimin says, standing up with Jihoon in his arms and puts a hand on your shoulder. You look up at him, wanting to say that it's okay, but he's faster.

,,Your feet hurt, right? Let me run you a bath, love," he says, putting Jihoon on his baby chair and whispering ,,Wait for daddy, okay?" Jimin places a quick kiss on his head. Then he bends down a bit and you feel one of his hand on the back of your knees.

,,I can walk Jimin, don't carry me," you retort, your weight making you a little insecure. Of course he doesn't listen to you and in one swift motion your in his arms. He naturally watched out not to discomfort you or the baby, while proceeding to lifting you in his arms. You hear Jihoon giggling behind you, entertained by the sight of his mommy getting carried by his daddy like a baby.

,,Your dad is so strong, Jihoonie," Jimin calls out while walking to the bathroom.

Jihoon only laughs more at that comment yelling a ,,Me too!"

,,You're saying I'm fat?" you ask hurt, swatting his chest.

,,No, no! Of course you're not fat, baby. I'm just playing with Jihoonie," he panics, looking worried and concerned, because he knows that your hormones are getting the better hand of you these days. But it weren't your hormones this time. You almost laugh at his panicked face, but you decide to hold it in and not try to sooth him. Maybe you just have a little demon inside you that likes teasing Jimin, but you think it's fine for all those times he used to tease you for something.

,,You better be," you mutter and feel his lips pressing a soft kiss on your cheek.

He slowly lets you slide of his hold and you sit on the closed toilet lid, watching him as he runs water into the tub. Jimin tests the temperature of the water and hums quietly when he is satisfied with it. Then he puts some liquid inside to create bubbles and a delicious smell.

,,No bath bombs this time, I have to buy some again," Jimin says and you only nod. The fact that he even noticed that there were no bath bombs left made you want to cry. Maybe now the hormones were actually kicking in.

,,Thank you," you answer, never missing a chance to thank him for his care and thoughtfulness he's showing every day.

Jimin turns around, a lovely smile already tugging at his lips and widening once he takes me into sight.

,,You need me to help you?" he asks carefully. You shake your head as an answer.

,,No, go and feed Jihoon, your mini-me is starving," you reply. Jimin rolls his eyes at your exaggeration.

,,My mini-me is not starving," he makes clear and his eyes soften at the cute nickname you both - actually you - created for your little baby boy. Jihoon has so many of Jimins features- his nose, his lips and his eye colour are just like Jimins. You both always said how you wanted tiny replications of both of you running around the house once you'd get married, but now that it actually happened, it's scary how a tiny Jimin waddles though the house, always giggling after he'd done something he'd surely wasn't allowed to do.

,,Mommy!", Jihoon exclaims in that moment and you raise a brow up.

,,Hurry up, he's waiting," you say, swaying both your hands to shoo him away.

,,He just yelled your name. Shouldn't I be the one he's missing after coming home from a meeting?", he pouts, but doesn't wait for an answer as he leaves the bathroom.

You smile at his question. Suddenly you feel the need to snuggle your little Jihoon in your arms since he shouted your name, because he's alone, but you have to take a little break from today and his daddy is on his way to him anyway.

,,Daddy's coming!", you hear Jimin shout and you start discarding your clothes on the floor.

,,No, want mommy!", Jihoon yells back and you start laughing.

Apparently Jihoon wasn't satisfied with anything he got today.

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