#bill writes for stan <3

[rainbownixie]

you don't know how much these two being writers means to me <3

#they're so important to me so precious #i love kinnie moments #y'all they both like to write i'm gonna cry #they look so tiny too #i want to hug them #i love my beautiful writers i really do #mike writes stories for will <3 #bill writes for stan <3 #byler #stenbrough #bill denbrough #mike wheeler #it 2017 #stranger things

[strangesickness]

i was talking about stan and his OCD the other day but i didn't really talk about how the other losers would act about it. so!

please remember that OCD is a varied condition and not everyone with it is like what is depicted in this post!

bill

at first stan keeps his obsessions to himself, he's pretty aware of what is a "typical" thought process and what is his brain being kinda weird

but eventually bill finds him having a panic attack over something seemingly mundane. young stan to me had obsessions that focused on the supernatural and "curses", so something like opening an umbrella indoors throws him into hysterics

and as soon as he realizes what he's doing he's humiliated, because like who the fuck cares? everyone knows that's just a stupid superstition, and he's so worried bill's going to think he's a weirdo or a coward

but bill is like. extremely reasonable about it, i think he's used to georgie getting upset over seemingly nonsensical things (the way kids do), so he's just used to treating things he doesn't understand with severity.

maybe there's nothing scary to him about opening an umbrella indoors, but its clearly upset stan and that's what matters here. he calmly asks him what he's upset about and reassures him that if it upsets him then its important

he gets stan to talk through it, bill brings up how richie always opens his umbrella indoors but nothing bad has ever happened to him because of it, which doesn't help a ton because OCD isn't typically very reasonable, but it helps a bit, and stan calms down enough that bill bringing up richie prompts him to go off on a rant about something stupid richie did at school while bill was gone

eddie

despite not having OCD eddie gets it, especially after he finds out that he isn't actually sick

eddie is the first person stan chooses to tell about the weird circles his brain runs in, because he knows eddie still carries around his fake inhaler

eddie isn't scared of the same things stan is, but he can understand being afraid of something he logically knows can't hurt him. they're pretty good at working each other out of panic attacks because of this

richie

(the things richie says to stan here are things you should never ever say to someone with OCD unless you have their express permission, stan finds it funny and helpful, and as someone with OCD so do i, but many will not, and talking like this could make their mental state worse and is just generally an asshole thing to do!)

on paper richie is an asshole to stan about his OCD, he calls him unreasonable, tells him he makes no sense, he's worrying over nothing, etc.

he frequently makes fun of stan's obsessions, if stan says something he thought because of his OCD richie will repeat it back to him in a Voice

but by some miracle this does wonders for stan

if anyone else was saying this stuff it would make him feel like shit, but because it's richie it's hilarious (not that he shows it)

richie assigning characters to his obsessions has managed to completely discredit some of them, and stan is straight up Not Bothered by some of them anymore because as soon as the thought pops up so does richie's voice and he can't take it seriously

there's the scandalized mother who thinks stan is a horrible person for not appreciating his meals properly or something

there's the conspiracy theorist trying to convince stan curses are real

and there's the high school coach who acts like stan is a one man army and they're going to lose the entire war if stan doesn't fold his sheets properly

stan doesn't want to give richie credit for his improved mental state because the way he did it is ridiculous, but yeah, richie and his voices have definitely helped

beverly

bev is great at Not Talking About It and Being Normal About It

stan will say something extremely concerning (use your imagination, i don't want to provide an example lol), and bev is like "yeah thats fucked up." and then they move on

he never gets the feeling she's brushing him off or anything, she'd definitely Actually Talk About It if he asked, but sometimes he just needs to get the thought out there and then immediately move on

sometimes it is exhausting to actually talk about feelings, sometimes stan just needs to express that he's feeling something, be acknowledged, then move on

"i just thought [insert concerning compulsion he doesn't want to do]" "or we could skip class and build a snowfort before all these other assholes ruin the fresh snow at lunch"

stan never feels judged in the slightest when he's with bev, and it helps free him of some of the judgment in his own mind :)

ben

ben is so so so good at listening, not only is he just the only nice 13 year old stan has ever met, he has one of those faces yknow?

he finds himself telling ben things it took him nearly a decade of friendship to tell bill

ben is clearly confused and concerned, but he never makes stan feel like he's unreasonable

stan usually only tells his friends about his specific obsessions when they've bottled up and are about to explode, or when he's in the midst of a panic attack

but with ben he feels like he can talk about the other stuff that comes with it, the impact his thought processes have had on his life

ben offers suggestions from time to time, not all of them stick, but the ones that do really help stan out

mike

mike finds a way to keep stan from worrying about anything at all

stan could spend all day worrying about something, and then mike shows up and explains some new topic to stan and it's like stan wasn't even stressed in the first place

stan can't even count the number of times mike has gone through an explanation of the history of derry, or what various states are known for, or the tasks mike does at the farm, or the history of some obscure scientific/cultural phenomenon

stan genuinely loves hearing about anything mike wants to talk about, but he also just finds mike to be a really engaging speaker to the point he stops thinking about whatever was bothering him

it is very much a win/win situation

sometimes mike will manage to pull him out of whatever was worrying him and get him to talk about birds and the boy scouts and they always end up having a ton of fun :)

the losers love stan and he loves them <3

#reminder: do not talk to your mentally ill friends the way richie talks to stan here!!! #some might find it funny/helpful but many will not. do not say anything of this sort unless they specifically say its okay! #if they don't find the joke funny you're not being funny you're just being a dick!!! #started writing this post because of the time i referred to one of my Thoughts as “the angry twitter user in my head” #and imagined richie assigning characters to all of stan's obsessions and that completely discrediting them #i have OCD and am writing from experience/how i wish people reacted. please be normal about this post <3 #posts afflicted with a strange sickness #it stephen king #it 2019 #it 2017 #stanley uris #stan uris #bill denbrough #eddie kaspbrak #richie tozier #beverly marsh #ben hanscom #mike hanlon

[astro-b-o-y-d]

Chapter 4 is taking much longer than anticipated to edit (literally spent the whole day on it and I'm only halfway done), but I'm still halfway done with it!! And I'll see if I can't hammer away at it tomorrow as well.

#Hayley Writes Triangulum #It's a VERY Ford and Bill focused chapter for the most part and by that I mean: #'Bill is constantly trying to strike up a conversation with Ford and Ford is refusing to speak to him outside of threats' #SO YOU KNOW. Riveting dialogue going on between them right now #Combined with Stan and Ford's misunderstanding/fight; I am. Very tired. #But!!! It's okay!!! Because this stuff needs to happen and I'm going to put so much care into MAKING it happen #And at least I've reached the scene where Ford starts studying Bill's human form for the sake of some tests he needs to run #There I can drop some hints about Bill's true age that are hidden behind the 'Oh that's only because he looks like Dipper' excuse :3

[ckret2]

A leaked list of some of the exciting upcoming content from The Book of Bill:

The pyramids of Giza ranked from most to least sexy.

Winning lottery numbers. He does not say which game they're for.

Three pages of Bill practicing blackletter calligraphy so that he can write the fancy-looking "The Book of Bill" on the cover. (Meant to tear those pages out before submitting book to publisher.)

A section where he implies that all your headcanons about him are stupid. Yes, your headcanons specifically. If you compare your copy of the book to a friend's, these sections will have different text. He insults all headcanons equally, even the ones that contradict each other.

A long, rambling story about a funny thing that he saw at a party in the Nightmare Realm, but he keeps getting distracted gossiping about the embarrassing love affairs and crimes against reality the partygoers have committed. Not a single one of these characters has ever been mentioned before or ever will be again. He gets so distracted he never finishes the original funny story. He was clearly drunk when he wrote this section.

A pet care sheet on how to keep a pet axolotl. All of the information is extremely wrong.

Some of the other dimensions he's tried and failed to conquer. He keeps insisting that all the failures were somebody else's fault. It's extremely obvious that they're his fault.

A photograph of a vivisected elephant, for some reason.

A phone number written on a cocktail napkin that Bill insists would be really funny for all the readers to prank call. It leads to the desk phone of the director of the CIA. 

Bill claims he definitely totally knew that Stan was disguised as Ford the whole time, he only played along to trick the Pines back, and then he quickly changes the topic.

A page of Bill's original poetry. It's all unintelligible symbols. It will take 27 years for somebody to crack the code. They're all gory but juvenile limericks.

A cocktail recipe. It will kill you.

Bill's original version of the portal blueprints that he copied to give Ford, with Bill's handwritten annotations. One part of the blueprints is labeled "component that will accidentally destroy the universe. REMEMBER NOT TO INCLUDE THIS COMPONENT IN SIXER'S COPY!!" He underlined this twice. If this page is compared to the portal blueprints in Journal 3, it's clear that Bill included that component in Ford's copy.

A personality quiz to help you meet your ideal sleep paralysis demon.

Bill's baby pictures. He looks exactly the same, except his bow tie and top hat are too big.

Bill reveals that he thought the llama symbol on the zodiac wheel referred to that farmer guy on the edge of town, and he was super confused to see Pacifica there.

Multiple pages scattered through the book about Bill's amazing powers, his brilliant and fun plans for our dimension, and all the cool favors he's willing and able to do for his friends and followers. All these pages end with a passive-aggressive aside about how somebody would have to be REALLY stupid to turn down an invitation to join Bill's crew, Stanford Pines—

A page labeled "My loyal servants and slaves!" filled with several hideous, oozing, nightmare-inducing Lovecraftian monsters, and one Mickey Mouse.

A self-portrait depicting Bill riding a rocket ship playing an electric guitar while rainbow lightning flashes all around him and money rains down from the sky.

A cynical, sneering tirade about how love is evolution's idiotic way of tricking primitive species into reproducing and how only simple-minded mortals who can't separate their true thoughts from their hormones fall for it. In the margins he's drawn a heart around the words "Bill Cipher +" a scribbled-out blot. The blot is completely unreadable. Despite this, the fandom will spend years debating the name underneath based on the size of the blot.

Extremely stupid "explanations" about various unsolved mysteries and crimes. In six years the world will discover one of them is accidentally correct and Alex Hirsch will get investigated by the FBI.

The book will be divided into four sections. Each section will begin with a big illuminated letter. In order, the four illuminated letters spell "F" "U" "C" "K".

#gravity falls #bill cipher #the book of bill

[hengqarae]

reckless driver

PAIRING ❄ kim mingyu x afab!reader WORD COUNT ❄ 10k words GENRE ❄ street racer au, angst, romance, smut (minors dni), the teeniest tiniest smidge of humor WARNINGS ❄ swearing, illegal activity (drag/street racing), making out, extreme pining, whirlwind romance, smut (fingering, protected sex), not proofread, brief hospital scene

you hate racing and you don't date racers. kim mingyu loves racing, and he finds out that he loves you, too, from the moment that he first lays eyes on you.

PLAYLIST ❄ reckless driving by lizzy mcalpine (ft. ben kessler) / yards / gardens by kate bollinger / btbt by b.i. & souljia boy tell 'em (ft. devita) / notice me by sza / nothing but the love by wrabel / with my eyes closed by cults / anyone by seventeen / angel eyes by abba FROM THE AUTHOR ❄ mingyu, crawling up my bias list because of my own fic that i wrote about him... i am a lizzy stan before i am a human, and the first time that i heard reckless driving, i knew that she was singing about mingyu (or, at least, the mingyu that i would one day write about). i hope that you enjoy reading this, and i hope that you are having a wonderful new year <3

You didn’t know what you were getting into when you visited the track that very first time. 

To your credit, you did not visit with the intention of falling in love. Your roommate, Lee Chan, had begged and pleaded for you to accompany him, to indulge, even just once, in this newfound passion of his. He had started racing to pay his bills, but quickly figured out that he enjoyed it. The rush of adrenaline made him feel alive, he’d tell you. You would always follow that up by telling him that he was chasing a high that could kill him one day. 

You didn’t support his racing. You hated saying goodbye to him when he left for races. You always found yourself anxiously awaiting news, tossing and turning whenever you tried to sleep, forced to occupy yourself with something to distract you while you waited for a call, a text, anything to assure you that he had finished the race safely and that he would be coming home at the end of the night. The possibility of getting arrested didn’t really scare either of you; you were mostly afraid that you would lose your best friend, and because of your own stubbornness, you weren’t going to be present if, and when, that happened. That’s the only reason that you started attending races with him. You’ve made sure that you’re abundantly clear about that, too. 

“It’s s'posed to be a really good race tonight!” Chan was practically bouncing in his seat. You hummed quietly in response, eyes trained on his speedometer. He was prone to driving fast when he was excited, and you were nervous enough at the prospect of him racing at all – your nerves didn’t need to be exacerbated by speeding down the interstate en route to the track. “All of the circuits are having their championships tonight, so if I place, I’ll get to move up to C! All the S racers will be there, too. Choi Seungcheol, Joshua Hong, Kim Mingyu – they're, like, gods in the downtown racing circuit.” 

“And which one do I have to thank for bringing you into racing?” 

Chan groans quietly, hands shifting their positions on the steering wheel. “Don’t talk to anyone. Even though I love and adore you, and your opinions are very important to me... I don’t know if your anti-racing agenda will be met very favorably tonight.” 

“What? I said I was going to thank them.” 

“Right.” Chan forces a smile. “Please do not talk to anyone tonight.” 

You huff quietly in response, shifting in your seat and crossing your arms over your chest. You hope that your phone has enough battery to get you through the night. You were definitely not going to watch Chan race, and you doubted that you were going to meet anyone at the track that could offer titillating conversation; that is, you weren’t interested in talking about racing or cars, and it was unlikely that you’d find anyone that could offer much beyond that. You’d likely spend your time in Chan’s car, scrolling through Tik Tok while you waited for him or until your battery died and you were forced to be alone with your own thoughts. 

At least, that had been your intention. When you and Chan arrive at the track, you’re quickly reminded of that saying about best laid plans. 

“Mingyu! What’s up, man?” Chan barely bothers to turn off his ignition before he’s bounding out of his car, greeting another man. One look tells you that this guy – Kim Mingyu, you’re assuming, as Chan had already mentioned him – is a racer, too, and you’re spurred out of the car to give him a piece of your mind. Chan only realizes that you’ve come up behind him once Mingyu’s gaze travels to you, and he’s quick to try and jump on offense. “M-Mingyu, this is my roommate. They... don’t race.” 

“They don’t like racing, either.” You offer, crossing your arms again, leaning against the hood of Chan’s car. You’re uncomfortable with the way that Mingyu is sizing you up, and you don’t miss the smug countenance plastered on his, admittedly handsome, face. Still, you find it difficult to peel your eyes away from his. He’s... hot. You had made it easier to villainize the sport by picturing all other racers to be stout, middle-aged men with receding hairlines. Unfortunately, or fortunately, Mingyu doesn’t fit that picture. 

“Roommates. Is that code for something, or is this actually platonic?” Mingyu keeps his eyes locked with you as he asks, even though you get the sense that his question is directed at Chan. You feel warm under his gaze, unsure if it’s because you’re uncomfortable, or if it’s because you’re finding yourself more and more attracted to Mingyu as you stare at him. Every few seconds, you have to remind yourself that he’s another stupid racer, and for that reason alone, it’s out of the question. 

“N-No, we’re just friends. Nothing like that. Why do you— oh, shit, hold on. Hoshi!” Chan pulls away before he can finish his own question, chasing after another man, leaving you and Mingyu still locked in on each other. His smirk seems to grow even wider, and you shift your weight. You wish Chan had stayed and finished his question. You, too, would like to know why Mingyu had asked. 

As nice as he is to look at, though, if you don’t speak to anyone else tonight, you’ll at least have told Kim Mingyu how you feel about his and Chan’s stupid racing. You won’t back down, even under the warmth that’s blooming across your skin. “Are you the one that brought Chan into this shit?” 

“Dirty words comin’ from such a pretty mouth.” 

“A-Answer the question.” 

Sliding his hands into the pockets of his jackets, Mingyu offers a shrug. “He was already into it when I met him. It was probably...” He looks around after he trails off before focusing back on you. You raise your eyebrows at him, waiting for him to continue, but he doesn’t. He only mimics your expression, raising his own eyebrows back at you. 

“Well? Who was it? Is he here?” 

“I don’t want to tell you.” 

You scoff. “I-I’m not going to hurt them. I just want to yell at them.” 

“Yeah, that’s why.” You knit your eyebrows together and Mingyu’s smirk grows even wider, turning into a full grin now. “I’d rather you yell at me instead. You seem like you’d be hot when you’re mad.” 

You’re at a loss. It’s been a while, if ever, since you’ve been flirted with so shamelessly, and as badly as you want to stay mad about your current situation – your best friend refusing to quit racing despite your constant protests and you, inevitably, getting dragged to the track with him – you're finding it hard to keep it together when Mingyu is looking at you like he wants to devour you. “I don’t fuck with racers.” 

“I think I could persuade you.” 

“I don’t want to be persuaded.” 

“I like a challenge.” Mingyu bends at the waist, meeting you at eye level from where you’re leaning on Chan’s car. You scrunch your nose when you catch a whiff of his cologne, telling yourself that no, you do not like how he smells. “God, you’re so pretty.” 

“Stop flirting with me.” You snap. 

There’s that smirk again. “Okay, angel.” 

You groan, rolling your eyes and throwing your head back. When you lift your head back, Mingyu seems to have gotten closer. If you reach out, you could grab the collar of his jacket and pull him even closer. Your fingertips tingle at the prospect, but you refrain. Instead, you take the opportunity to study his face up close, his smooth, tanned skin and his deep brown eyes and his plump lips. You must have been looking for a while, because Mingyu feels compelled to finally break you out of your trace. 

“You can look and touch, y’know.” 

“Pass.” You scowl, snapping out of it and leaning back, attempting to create some distance between the two of you. “Don’t you need to warm up or something?” 

“I don’t race for another few hours.” 

You set your jaw. What is this guy doing? Why is he wasting his time on you? You’re sure that, somewhere else within the track, he could find plenty of other people willing to swoon over him, ready to fall to their knees and offer him some pre-race stress relief. You weren’t one of those people. You hate racing. You hate that Chan fell into it, and you hate how you become too worried to function sometimes. You had met him in college, and for him to forsake the degree that he earned for the quick, easy money that he was getting now made your emotions flare. His business degree wasn’t going to kill him. Racing, eventually, will. 

The scent of Mingyu’s cologne is making you feel dizzy, enveloped in the scent of him, and under other circumstances, you’d already have him pressed against you. This was one of Chan’s races, though. You get enough of this shit at home from him; you aren’t going to bring any pieces back with you, too, even though you can imagine it would feel really good to touch Mingyu, and to have him touch you. 

Mingyu is perfectly content in standing and looking at you. He thinks you’re the second most beautiful person he’s ever laid eyes on, only behind his mother, and if today is the only day he’ll ever be able to see you, he wants to burn the image of you onto the back of his eyelids. 

You finally reach out a hand, pressing your palm against his chest and pushing him back. Nevermind how firm his chest is and how strongly you’re urged to grip his black t-shirt and pull him forward instead of pushing him back. He smiles even as you widen the gap between the two of you. “Is this what you want? You want me to go?” 

You open your mouth to respond to him, to tell him that yes, he needs to leave, but the words won’t come out. Maybe you don’t want him to go. Not yet, anyway. Maybe you like the way that you feel when he’s looking at you, feverish, skin prickling with a sense of urgency that doesn’t make sense to you. Your insides twist uncomfortably when you look into his eyes, and yet, you don’t want to look away. 

Fuck, you wish that he didn’t race. 

“Just tell me to go away and I will, angel.” 

You can’t. You don’t want to. There’s some kind of magnetic pole within Mingyu’s body, compelling you toward him even though you wish that you could get away. You’re stuck in his orbit, and it’s a little scary. 

“You should stop racing.” You respond, finally remembering yourself. “You’re gonna get yourself killed.” 

“Duly noted. How ‘bout a kiss, just in case I do get myself killed tonight?” 

“In your dreams.” 

“Yeah.” Mingyu laughs, running a hand through his hair and pushing it back at the forehead. “I’ll definitely be dreamin’ about you.” 

Your body moves faster than your brain, finally giving into the desire to have him closer. Instead of pulling him toward you, you’re stepping forward. You like the feeling of having your body pressed against his, but more than that, you like the feeling of your lips pressed against Mingyu’s. He smiles that same insufferable, self-satisfied grin against your lips, but even that doesn’t make you pull away. Instead, you wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him in closer, fingers twirling in his hair. 

He puts his hands, big and warm, on your hips, holding you against him as you sink your teeth into his bottom lip. Mingyu groans in response and you take the opportunity to swipe your tongue against his top row of teeth. His grip becomes impossibly tighter, and he slides his tongue fully into your mouth, alternating between licking the inside of your mouth and massaging your tongue with his. Only when your lungs feel tight and burn from the lack of oxygen do you finally detach yourself from him, chest heaving up and down as you try to catch your breath. Mingyu flutters his eyes open, and the look in his eyes makes butterflies erupt in your chest. 

You untangle yourself from him immediately, running your hands through your own hair this time. “I--we—that--” 

“Was that you givin’ me material for my dreams?” 

“W-We shouldn’t have done that.” 

“We didn’t do anything. You kissed me.” 

“I-I know.” You’re still breathing heavily, your mind jumbled with thoughts of how you kissed Mingyu, how you should not have kissed Mingyu, and how much you liked kissing Mingyu. “That w-was a mistake. I didn’t mean to do that.” 

Mingyu juts out his bottom lip, red and puffy and tantalizing enough that you almost disregard your hesitation and dive in again. “You’re breakin’ up with me already? After all that we’ve been through?” 

“Stop making jokes!” You snap at him. “I-It isn’t funny! That—we--” 

“All we did was kiss. There will be plenty of opportunities to do it again.” You’re grasping at straws, trying to navigate through the fog that’s collected in your brain for a retort, when Mingyu’s phone goes off. He pulls it out of his pocket and, for the first time, you see him without a smile. “Call me, okay? Promise?” 

He backs away without waiting for a response, holding out his pinky finger toward you. You watch him retreat with a scowl on your face that only deepens once he blows a kiss at you, turning his back to you and taking off in a jog toward the racetrack. Once he’s been out of sight for long enough to ensure that he’s actually gone, you groan loudly, covering your hands with your face. Your face is hot, and your hands are clammy, and you keep thinking about how good it felt to kiss Mingyu, soft lips slotting between and sliding against yours, his fingers leaving your skin feeling scorched wherever they touched. 

You don’t know why you kissed him. You had been doing so well, holding yourself back and exhibiting some enviable self-restraint. Still, something in you had snapped, and you don’t know how you’ll be able to recover. On the bright side, you might never see Mingyu again. On the other hand, though, he’d shown a determination that makes you doubt he would let you go so easily. You can only hope that he’s just some playboy; that you’re the latest target of his conquest, that he’ll find somebody else and forget all about you. 

He told you that he liked a challenge, and unfortunately, you like being chased.

+ + +

Mingyu can’t stop thinking about you. He knew that this was going to be a problem when he first laid eyes on you and, lo and behold, he was lying in bed for the fourth night in a row, staring up into the dark, consumed with thoughts of you. 

He doesn’t know when he’ll see you again. He doesn’t know if he’ll see you again. What he does know is that he’s seriously lovesick, and you’re the only thing that’ll be able to cure him. This is not the type of person that Kim Mingyu is, though. Usually, he’s suave and charming, and he gets exactly what he wants... and then some. He’s so good at flirting because he does it so often, and yet, he wasn’t able to charm you completely. You’d kissed him – yes, you kissed him – and then, after his race, disappeared without another word. 

He is not a bad kisser. That’s a fact. And, yet, when you had kissed him, you had reacted like you’d committed some kind of grave sin. Mingyu has been with people that think he’s bad news, but that’s never served as an actual obstacle before. This is uncharted territory. He wants you. He wanted you before he even spoke to you; he wanted you as soon as he got his first glimpse of you. 

Your actions say that you want him, too, but your words have contradicted that, and Mingyu doesn’t know what he’s supposed to trust. He’s on the hook either way. 

He doesn’t know what time it is when he reaches for his phone on his nightstand. He doesn’t even know if this will work, but he’s got to try something. His sanity, and sleep cycle, depends on this. 

“Hey Siri, call Lee Chan.” 

The call gets picked up on the second ring, and Mingyu’s heart rate picks up, too. He releases a breath that he doesn’t even realize he’s been holding when he identifies the voice on the other end of the line. “Chan isn’t here right now. What do you want?” 

“I was calling to ask for you, actually, angel.” Mingyu sits up in bed, grinning into the phone. 

The silence on the other end of the line drives up his heart rate ever more, but when he hears shuffling, he’s able to relax a little. You haven’t hung up. “I’ll ask again. What do you want, Mingyu?” 

“Say my name again.” 

“I’m hanging up.” 

“N-No!” His face burns at how eager he must sound, but he doesn’t care to play it cool. Maybe with somebody else, but not with you. He has too much to lose to try and impress you. “I can’t stop thinking about you. I wanted to ask you to remove the spell you put on me.” 

His words cause your stomach to somersault. Truthfully, you’ve had a hard time since meeting, and kissing, Mingyu, too. You know that chalking it up to love at first sight would only exacerbate things. You don’t think it’s merely lust, though, either – you've always been able to restrain yourself. You’re careful with your feelings and your emotions, and there’s something there between you and Mingyu. You don’t know what, exactly, but you know that it can’t be there. You have enough on your plate, constantly worrying about Chan. You can’t add someone else, someone that does the exact same stupid stuff, into the mix. You need this to stop, for his sake and for yours. 

“I-It’s late and you’re probably just horny. Call someone else.” 

“What?” Mingyu’s incredulousness comes through clearly over the phone, and you nearly cringe at how harsh your words were. Still, you can’t indulge this. You shouldn’t. 

You want to. 

“N-No, I... I’m sorry.” You sigh, running a hand through your hair, frustrated. “Mingyu, I don’t fuck with racers. I told you that.” 

“Your roommate races.” 

“Yeah, and I hate that he does that, okay? I worry myself sick over him when he’s off racing. The only thing that I can be thankful about is that he does drag and not streets. But you do streets, too, don’t you?” Mingyu doesn’t respond, and you scoff quietly. “Yeah, I already know that you do. I-I can’t get involved with someone that risks their life all the time for money.” 

‘It’d be different if I were a cop, though, right? Or a firefighter? That’d make me a hero, right? This--” You hear him pause to take a breath. “I'm in love with you, okay? Completely and utterly smitten with you, to the point that it’s takin’ over my life.” Your breath hitches quietly at his confession, but Mingyu makes no indication that he heard you. “This isn’t my career. We can’t all tolerate cushy bureaucracy jobs. This is what I do now, for money, so that I can stop racin’ one day and retire, then and there. I want to enjoy my life. It’ll be more enjoyable if you’re in it. There is nothing else that I can say except for I’m sorry, and I love you.” 

“W-We just met, Mingyu. It hasn’t even been a week.” 

“I like to go fast.” 

You don’t know what else you can say. You can’t proclaim that you love him, not right now, but you’re sure that in a few weeks’ time, that’s where you’d be, too. Still, you know better. Mingyu is here today, but he could be gone the very next time that he has a race. That terrifies you. 

“I-I don’t know what you want me to say.” 

Mingyu’s at the end of his short rope. He had called in the first place so that he could hear your voice, thinking that maybe it could help him get to sleep. Now, though, he wishes he hadn’t called. He should’ve just suffered through his insomnia and continued suffering through it. It was better than the rejection he was facing. “Nevermind. Just forget it.” 

“Mingyu--” 

“No, angel, I—you kiss me, and then you push me away. You tell me to fuck off, then you tell me that under different circumstances, you’d be interested. I’ve shown you all of my cards, and you’re not interested in anteing up, so just forget it, okay?” 

You end the call before Mingyu can hear you cry. It’s all too fast, and you’re overwhelmed. You want him, but there’s one part of him that you just can’t accept. You aren’t reckless. You like to think things through, and you don’t do things on a whim. Kissing Mingyu had catalyzed a panic within you that you had lost control, and if you lose control once, you’re bound to do it again. It feels like you’re being backed into a corner with two options to get out: take Mingyu completely as he is or swallow your obvious feelings and leave him as he is. You clutch Chan’s phone tightly against your chest as you sob quietly, hot tears rolling down your cheeks even despite your attempts to stifle them. 

Mingyu, similarly, can’t believe what just happened. He’s too reckless. He bared himself to you too early, and the consequences that he’ll reap will not be good ones. He can’t help how he feels about you, and nobody feels more intensely than Kim Mingyu. He knows that he fucked up. He knows that he can’t come back from this, and he needs to cut his losses and find a way to get rid of his feelings for you. He doesn’t know how he’ll accomplish it, but if he never sees you again, that’ll probably be the fastest way he’ll be able to heal. He’s never cared for someone so deeply before he met you. He’s never known so immediately that he’s been in love. You’re it for him, and he doesn’t know what to do now that he’s already lost you.

+ + +

You shouldn’t have come. You knew that before you got into Chan's car, but now, with Mingyu’s gaze practically burning a hole into the side of your head, it’s been made abundantly clear. 

“Why is he looking at you like that?” Chan whispers while you shift your weight. “You never told me what happened between the two of you.” 

“I don’t want to get into it.” You mutter, willing yourself to look forward and not over at Mingyu, watching you from a distance like a predator observing its prey. It’s been weeks since your phone conversation. You were no less convinced that you were going to be able to forget about him, and a small part of you had hoped that you would come tonight and see somebody else draped around his arm, shocking you back into a state of rationality. 

That isn’t the case though, obviously, and you had to beg Chan to keep to you so that you aren’t vulnerable. You don’t know what you should expect from Mingyu. He’s reckless and volatile, and the way that you feel when you’re around him is... scary. As brief as your first interaction had been, you left with the sense that, if enough time had passed with you in his proximity, he would have replaced the necessity of air with himself; he would’ve become your air, and you would’ve suffocated without him. 

There’s something fantastic about the way that Mingyu has made you feel like you’re breathing and drowning at the same time, with just one little kiss and a simple love confession. 

“He's looking at you like you murdered his dog. Now he’s-- okay, now he’s looking at his phone... he’s looking at you again.” 

“I don’t need the play by play, Chan, thanks.” 

“Tell me what happened!” 

You shake your head. “I really don’t want to talk about it.” 

“Fine, then I’m leaving.” 

Your eyes widen and you turn to grab Chan, to pull him back and to keep him as your wall against Mingyu, but he’s out of reach before you’re able to react. In a matter of seconds, Mingyu has crossed the way and is standing in front of you, arms crossed tightly over his chest. You stare at him, horrified. 

He just scoffs. “You’re cruel, you know that?” 

“I-I’m not here--” 

“Yeah, whatever, you’re not here for me.” His hostility takes you aback, even though you know it’s deserved. You can tell from body language alone that Mingyu is still hurting. His words and tone of voice merely confirm that for you. “I-I don’t know how I’m supposed to get over you when you continue to show up to my races.” 

“It’s been weeks already, Mingyu.” 

“Yeah? And has the passage of time made you feel any better?” You don’t respond, turning away so that he can’t notice the tears brimming at your waterline. You’re biting your cheek to keep them from spilling. Mingyu knows better, though, and softens. Just a little. “I told you that I loved you, and I still do. I’m willin’ to do anything for you – anything except quit.” 

That’s the only thing that you need from him, though. “We barely know each other. You don’t love me.” 

“You don't know how I feel. You haven’t bothered to ask.” 

“B-Because you tell me even if I don’t ask! You don’t know me well enough to say that you love me.” 

“I can say whatever I damn well please.” He scoffs, tongue poking the inside of his cheek. “There is somethin’ between us, you can’t deny that, and I’m willing to do whatever it takes to foster this spark that we have. That’s love, isn’t it?” 

“That’s--” You cut yourself off, groaning in frustration. His words make your knees feel weak, but you’re not ready to let up the fight. “You’re too nonchalant about this for it to be love. It’s supposed to be something bigger. You can’t just look at someone for the first time and decide that they’re it for you!” 

“I can, and I did.” 

You shake your head, wiping away a stray tear with the heel of your hand. “I-I don’t love you.” 

“You don’t, or you won’t?” 

“You’re a danger to yourself! If you loved me, truly, then you wouldn’t put me through the risk of losing you every time you get behind the wheel.” 

It’s Mingyu’s turn to shake his head. “That’s all I am, then, yeah? I’m just a stupid guy that drives fast for money, and that’s all I’ll ever be?” Even when you open your money to respond, he ignores you and continues talking. “You’re doin’ this on purpose. You don’t want to admit to yourself that I’m more than what you’ve chosen to see. You won’t even give me a chance to be anything else.” 

The conversation is starting to make you dizzy. You press your middle finger to one of your temples, rubbing small circles against your skin. “It was just one kiss, Mingyu.” 

“Then kiss me again and show me that I got worked up over somethin’ that I shouldn’t have.” 

You can’t. You shouldn’t. You know exactly what needs to happen in order to prove to him that you aren’t the one, that he should back off and keep searching for the true love of his life, and you also know that you aren’t going to be able to fake it. You don’t feel your emotions as intensely as Mingyu does, but you’re never going to be able to escape this whirlwind if you kiss him now. 

You kiss him anyway. 

Your hands are trembling as you hold his face, pulling him in and pressing your lips against his. He lets you take the lead, slowly slotting his lips between yours only after you’ve initiated movement. Your actions are impossibly calculated as you try to exercise restraint, but, once again, you forget yourself. Your hands work their way into Mingyu’s hair – it's gotten longer since the last time that you did this – and you grip the strands tightly as you pull him closer. He, on the other hand, remembers his manners. He smiles against your lips before he pulls away, and the soft whimper that he hears from you nearly makes him dive right back in. 

“You’re so full of shit.” He whispers, eyes still closed, his lips ghosting against yours. “You love me.” 

“I-I don’t.” You respond, breathless. 

“Yeah?” He presses his lips against yours again, pulling away when you try to pull him closer and deepen the kiss. He’s taunting you, and you hate that you like it. You hate that he knows exactly what he needs to do to keep you wanting more. “Then we’re done here, I guess.” 

“No, we’re not.” Whispering against his lips draws a shiver up your spine. “Don’t go.” 

“You don’t love me, remember?” 

“Come home with me.” Mingyu stills against you, swallowing thickly. He hopes that you can’t hear his heart thumping loudly against his ribcage. “Skip your race and fuck me instead.” 

His chest tightens, as does his grip on your hip. “You’re---that’s not fair.” 

“I’m in love with a guy that does everything that I stand against. Life isn’t fair.” 

“R-Right.” Mingyu presses his forehead against yours, his eyes shut as he resumes his ministrations against your skin. He can’t believe how the tides have turned, but he’s not going to ruin it. Not again. Both of you are quiet as you even out your breathing, but finally, Mingyu cuts through the silence. “Counteroffer. I fuck you after my race when I’m ten grand richer.” 

“Get a real job, and then I’ll be impressed by you making money.” 

“Like a cop, right?” He punctuates his sentence with a kiss. “Or a firefighter?” Another kiss. “Aren’t men more attractive when they have money?” 

You exhale deeply as you pull yourself away from Mingyu. “Look, I—we—there need to be rules if we’re going to... be something. T-Together.” Mingyu raises his eyebrows in anticipation, and you sigh again. “Sex is a reward that you get when you skip races.” 

“That’s a punishment for both of us.” 

You ignore him and move on. “I don’t want to know details after the fact. Let me know as soon as possible if you’re alive or not.” 

That gets a laugh out of him. “Okay, I promise I will let you know as soon as I can if I die.” 

“That’s... all. For now.” You clasp your hands together, tilting your head as you look at him. “So? Are you skipping tonight.” 

“Baby, it’s ten grand.” Mingyu whines, reaching out and taking both of your hands in his. Your heart skips a few beats while he laces your fingers with his. “I’ll skip the one I have tomorrow. Promise.” 

“Maybe I won’t want to have sex with you tomorrow.” You lilt your words, looking to the side. 

Mingyu sighs loudly, swinging your hands gently. “I’d be content to sit and stare at you, too.” 

+ + +

As expected, Mingyu wins his race and the ten grand. As promised, he skipped his race on the following day and came to see you instead. That’s why you’re in his lap, and why his shirt is already off, and why you’re sure that he can feel how wet you are through your shorts. You opted to forego underwear in favor of easier access, and you made sure to encourage Chan to go out for dinner after his own race, too. 

“You’re such a fuckin’ tease.” Mingyu rasps, sliding a hand under your shirt. His hand travels against the expanse of your abdomen before cupping your breast, settling there to squeeze and knead your flesh as he continues sucking bruises against your collarbone. “Playin’ hard to get but wantin’ me just as bad.” 

“D-Dirty words coming from a p-pretty mouth.” You gasp, paying homage to something he’d said to you the first time that you met. 

Mingyu smiles against you, the feeling of his teeth grazing against the tender spots of your skin making you shiver. “It gets dirtier, angel, don’t worry.” 

You roll your hips against his, eliciting a groan. That spurs you on to do it again, pausing to gyrate against his erection, whimpering quietly at its contact with your core. There are layers of clothes in the way, but you know they’ll be gone soon enough. For now, the sweat collecting on Mingyu’s forehead, the parting of his lips, and the grunts and groans spilling from them are enough to keep you occupied. He squeezes your breast in response to the friction, using his other hand to cup your neck and pull your face down for a kiss. 

You sigh against his lips, and he takes the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth, languid movements that correspond well with the rhythm that you’re using to grind on his lap. He pulls away after only a few minutes, eyes following the trail of saliva connecting the two of you until it breaks, and then he looks at you. His pupils are blown out – probably just like yours – and your stomach flips at the wicked grin that blooms on his face. 

“Can I fuck you with my fingers first?” 

The words ignite a fire that quickly spreads across the expanse of your skin. You grip Mingyu’s shoulders and lift yourself off of him, hovering above his lap so that he can pull your shorts off. He groans when he sees that you aren’t wearing underwear, and his mouth waters at the prospect of tasting you. Today, he’ll go easy and prep you with his fingers. Next time, though, he wants his tongue buried in your folds until you’re begging him to stop. 

“Such a tease.” He says again, laughing to himself. “Turn around.” 

You do as he says, and he eases you against him with gentle hands on your shoulders. Your back is pressed against his chest, your heartbeat can be felt so strongly that someone could take your pulse by pressing just about another, and when Mingyu hooks his legs under yours to keep them wedged open, you know that you’re done for. 

He drops his chin and lets it rest on your shoulder, watching as best as he can as he slides his index finger up and down against your entrance, collecting your arousal. “I can’t believe you tried to keep this pretty little pussy from me. It’s mine now, though, isn’t it?” 

“Y-Yes,” You stutter out, gasping once Mingyu inserts his finger. He’s only partially inside, only to the second knuckle, but his fingers are so much longer than yours, and every other time you’ve fingered yourself doesn’t compare to how good it feels to have him inside instead. “It’s yours.” 

“Yeah, it is.” He coos, sliding his finger out and then back in. His rhythm is slow, and his movements are shallow, but as soon as he feels you relax, he’ll give you more. Normally impatient, Mingyu has all the time in the world to fuck you properly. He presses kisses against the side of your neck while he builds up a faster tempo, strands of hair falling over his eyes and tickling the underside of your jaw. You exhale quietly, and once he feels your shoulders drop, he inserts his finger completely on the next thrust. 

You whimper against him, back arching, and he uses the opportunity to wrap an arm across you diagonally, cupping your other breast through your shirt. “Don’t run away from me. I want you to be all stretched out and ready for my cock. You want my cock today, don’t you?” 

“Fuck.” You groan, tilting your head back to rest against Mingyu. He’s gradually picking up speed, and the way that you clench at his words only encourages him to do more; to say more, and to add another finger. So that’s what he does, slow as he brings in his middle finger, starting at just the second knuckle so that you can adjust to the feeling. “I want your c-cock.” 

“I know you do.” He presses his cheek against the side of your head, his lips positioned right against your ear. “You’re gonna get my cock. You’re gonna take it, all of it, everything that I give you tonight.” He punctuates his words by sliding both of his fingers into you fully, and the curl of his fingers makes you cry out involuntarily. He grins to himself and goes again, reaching for that same spot inside of you, grinning even wider when you cry again. “There we go. That’s where my baby likes to get fucked, yeah? Wish my tongue could go that far.” 

“Y-Your cock can reach.” 

Mingyu laughs out loud, stilling his fingers inside of you to stroke your g-spot again and again. “That’s true. I’ll make you cum with my cock next. Sound good?” You’re trembling in his arms, your legs having tried to clamp shut several times. He falls into a rhythm of cramming his fingers inside, hooking them and nudging your g-spot with them, and sliding them back out, and he gets so focused on making you cum that he furrows his brow, lips parted in the concentration. 

You’re panting loudly now, thrashing as best as you can in his hold, unable to run from the pleasure that’s edging closer and closer. “M-Mingyu--” 

“Fuck, say my name again, baby.” 

“K-Keep—fuck—M-Min--” 

“You’re doin’ so good. My pretty baby, such an angel.” 

It’s the praise that finally sends you toppling over the cliff; that, and his thumb kneading your clit, which you hadn’t even noticed until he stills his movements. You clench around Mingyu as you orgasm, and his ego grows three sizes at the ironclad grip that your pussy has on his fingers. He brings his free hand up to stroke the side of your face as you come, still pinning you against him with his forearm to keep you from slumping forward. “You don’t wanna let me go, huh? Want to stay like this forever?” 

“N-No.” You sigh, the stars in your vision finally subsiding. Your chest heaves up and down as you work to catch your breath, leaning back against Mingyu and turning your head to place a kiss against his cheek. “You promised to fuck me properly. Unless you’re too tired...” 

“Angel, if you’re implyin’ that I’m all speed and no stamina--” 

“I’m not implying anything. I’m wondering why your dick is still in your pants and not inside of me.” 

Mingyu stares at you, then blinks, and then smiles. It’s a real, genuine smile, not his signature smirk or crooked, self-satisfied grin. He tilts your chin up to place a proper kiss on your lips and then reaches behind him, blindly feeling the top of your nightstand until he finds the condom he’d brought. He eases you off his lap and fully rolls off the bed, offering you reprieve while he brings his cock out of his shorts. You watch with half-lidded eyes as he pumps himself, rolling on the condom with haste you haven’t seen from any of your previous sexual partners before. 

“We’re gonna go slow, okay?” He asks, slotting himself between your legs. He’s careful as he maneuvers himself around your limbs, groaning to himself once you wrap your legs around him and cross your ankles. You’re so eager now, but just yesterday, you almost rejected him for the second time. “Th-- y-you’re not going slow, angel.” 

“I thought you liked to go fast.” You draw out your words, lilting your voice. Mingyu ignores your comment, just this once, and grips you by one of your hips. He’s concentrated as he lines himself up at your entrance before letting go of his cock and swiping a finger against your folds again. You furrow your brows, sitting up as best as you can to look at him. 

He has the finger in his mouth, sucking and swirling his tongue around it. He only notices you staring at him once he pulls it out of his mouth. He grins, a little bashful, as he looks back down and grabs his dick again. “I forgot to taste you.” 

You clench around nothing at his words, groaning softly, but when he finally presses the tip of his cock against your slit, it feels like a jolt of electricity. You do your best to lay still as he inches inside of you, stopping every time that he feels resistance against him, but the tip of his cock nudges against your g-spot when he finally bottoms out and your back arches. Your hands flail around, looking for something to hold, something to keep you anchored, but you just have to settle for gripping the sheets on either side of you. You crumble the fabric in your hands, eyes squeezed shut, letting yourself adjust the feeling of Mingyu inside of you. 

Maybe today will be fine, but you can easily foresee having an insanely hot boyfriend with a big dick as being a problem in the future. 

“Let me know when I can move, baby.” 

“Can’t we just stay like this forever?” You sigh, lolling your head to the side and looking up at Mingyu. The sight makes your heart flutter; his hair is sweaty, pushed back at the forehead but with strands still obscuring parts of his vision; the different scratches, bruises, and bites that you’d given him while making out were finally starting to bloom red on his skin. He’s looking back at you, and the look in his eyes makes you think that he’d be content with that, too. “You can quit... y’know, your job... and just become my trophy husband. Keep the house clean and fuck me through my Zoom meetings.” 

“Sounds like a dream. Did we really go this far just so you could cockwarm me, though?” 

“No.” You laugh, reaching out for Mingyu. He meets you halfway, taking your hand in his and pressing a kiss to the back of your hand. “You can move now.” 

You don’t hear it clearly, but you swear that Mingyu whispers Thank God to himself before he slides his hands just above your ass, hoisting up your hips for the best angle. His initial pace is slow, painstakingly slow, but the string of moans that falls from your lips spurs him to speed up. At first, he sheaths himself completely inside of you before pulling almost completely out, leaving just the head of dick inside before thrusting back up into you. As he continues, though, he’s more urgent. He wants to minimize the amount of time he spends not inside of you, so his thrusts become shallower. He’s soon thrusting into you at breakneck speed, slowing every so often to make sure his angle is right and that you’re enjoying this just as much as he is. 

“How we doin’, angel?” 

“I want to ride you next time.” 

“Fuck.” Mingyu groans, sliding a hand up to caress your calf. The room is quiet, save for the squeaking of your bedframe and the sound of Mingyu’s balls slapping against you with every thrust. Every so often, he thrusts perfectly, and you’re brought up from the bed again. Mingyu curses himself that he didn’t ask you to take your shirt off – this would all be even better if your tits were bouncing in his face. “A-Are you close? What do you need from me?” 

You hold out your hand, and he grabs it. You’ll be able to show him better than tell him. You lead his hand down, pressing his thumb against your clit again. He immediately gets to work, rolling the nub between his thumb and index finger, and you hold onto his wrist as you gasp for air. His touch is cool against your feverish skin, and you tell yourself that you’re royally fucked just as Mingyu’s thrusts become staccato. 

“I--I’m--” 

“Inside, Mingyu, p-please.” You sigh, using your free hand to caress his bicep. “Cum inside of m-me.” 

“A-Are you s-s--” 

You draw him in closer to you, and the squeeze his body against yours, and the squeeze of your pussy around him, does exactly what it should. He’s loud as he cums, his body spasming as he shoots inside of you. You’re disappointed at the lack of warmth, warmth you would’ve felt if he hadn’t worn a condom, but there will be time for unprotected. For now, you squeeze your eyes shut, trying to bring yourself to orgasm while Mingyu rides out his own. 

You’re afraid that you’ve lost it, but Mingyu recovers quickly enough to resume his ministrations against your clit. For good measure, he leans down and kisses you, and all of the sensations – his cock still inside of you, his fingers on your clit, his tongue shoved down your throat – are enough to bring you back up and back over the cliff. Your whimpers are drowned out by Mingyu’s grunts as you squeeze around him. He lowers himself onto you completely as you ride out your orgasm, trembling and spasming underneath him until you’re finally able to go still. He finds enough energy to lift his head and look at your face, laughing when he notices the tear that’d rolled down your cheek. 

“Cute.” He reaches up and brushes it away with his finger, letting his arm drape across you. You don’t know how long the two of you lay like that; Mingyu, pressed on top of you, his cock still nestled inside of you, one arm draped across your body with his face nuzzled into your neck and you, pinned against the mattress, one hand caressing his back while the other cards through his hair. It feels like it’s been mere seconds, but an eternity could pass, and you’d still feel like it wasn’t enough time.

+ + +

It’s the call that you always expected, but simultaneously, always hoped you’d never get. 

You’re numb as you rise from your bed, rifling through your drawers in the dark for clothes to change into. It doesn’t feel like you’re responsible for moving through your bedroom, getting dressed as best one can when they can’t feel anything. Chan is already waiting for you at the front door, unwilling to look at your face as he leads you out, locking the door behind the two of you and following you into the elevator just as the doors start to close. He must’ve gotten a call, too. 

It feels right to drive in complete silence. You’re unable to convince yourself to bring your eyes into focus. Maybe, if you don’t look, then this won’t be real: you aren’t actually en route to the hospital’s emergency room, and you didn’t actually get a call from an unknown number, telling you that Mingyu had crashed during his race and that he was in an ambulance on the way to the hospital. Chan isn’t actually driving you, speechless and quiet for the first time since you’d met him. You aren’t actually being led through the tiled corridor of the hospital, harsh fluorescent lights guiding your venture down the endless hallway toward your boyfriend’s room. 

Mingyu is drinking from a juice box when you finally set eyes on him. That little fucker. 

All things considered, he looks fine. His left arm is in a sling, and there’s a deep horizontal gash underneath one of his eyes, and there are bruises starting to bloom along the crook of his neck. Otherwise, though, he’s fine. He isn’t intubated, and actually, the only other things attached to him are an IV and the heart rate monitor clipped onto his finger. 

Chan enters the room a few seconds after you, letting out a huge sigh of relief at the sigh. He holds a hand to his forehead before swinging back around and stepping outside. He knows that he doesn’t want to hear the words you’ll choose to say to Mingyu. 

“I love you. I love you so, so, so much.” 

“Fuck you.” You spit, drawing in your arms and crossing them over your chest. He knows that he deserves this, but he still winces at the venom dripping from your words and the daggers that you’re shooting at him with your eyes. “I thought that you died, you fucking asshole! You—I am so fucking mad right now, I don’t even know what to say.” 

“I’m sorry. I-I was careful, I promise.” 

“You’re a fucking liar! You’re in the hospital, Mingyu. Careful people don’t go to the hospital!” 

You sit on the chair in the corner, purposefully away from your boyfriend, even though you didn’t miss the way that he scooted to the side in his bed to make room for you. You’re able to see his face better from this angle. He looks... tired. The bags under his eyes are more pronounced, and for the first time since you’ve met him, he doesn’t look happy following one of his races. Figures, since he’d crashed his car. Still, there’s something different about him today. 

“You must’ve been worried. I’m sorry, my angel.” 

You sigh loudly, shaking your head. “I don’t want you to be sorry. I want you to be my boyfriend that works a shitty job. Hell, you don’t even need to work. We can survive on my income, and I can come home to you every day and that’ll be enough, because I’ll be happy, and you’ll be alive.” You take a breath after your monologue, exhaling slowly. “Because that’s the bar that you’ve set. I’m just happy that you’re still breathing.” 

“I have somethin’ to say, too.” You look up at him, raising your eyebrows and clasping your hands together. Mingyu chews on his bottom lip for a few moments before he sighs, too. “I’m a racer. I’ve been racin’ for... God, I don’t know. I’ve been racin’ for a long time.” You let your head fall, anticipating what he’s going to say. “All that I’ve ever cared about is going fast and makin’ money. And then I met you, and my priorities... shifted. A little.” You squeeze your hands together, willing yourself to calm down. Mingyu was proving your assumptions wrong with his words, but you don’t want to get ahead of yourself. 

“You... I think I’d rather die than lose you. I-I guess, if I died, that I would lose you, but th—that's not the point. I started fallin’ in love with you the very moment that I first saw you, and since then, I haven’t wanted to take my eyes off you. You’re everythin’ to me now. Racin’ is... I’ll quit. I’m sorry, and I love you, and I’ll quit if it means that we’ll stay together.” 

Hot tears are already rolling down your cheeks, and as hard as you try to keep that from Mingyu, your sniffling gives you away. He coos from his place in bed and starts to throw his blankets off to approach you, but you hold your hand up and he stills. Offering another sniffle, you rise from your chair, sitting on the edge of his hospital bed. He looks at you, expectantly, and you, begrudgingly, reach out a hand. You weren’t expecting to forgive him so quickly. 

“Can you look at me? Please?” 

“Not right now.” 

“Angel, please.” Mingyu takes your hand, trying to tug you closer to him. “Look at me. I just... you’re doin’ that thing again, where you let me bare my soul and then don’t really respond.” 

You shake your head, tears flying from your eyes and landing on the hospital blanket covering Mingyu’s legs. He scoffs, using his other hand to reach forward and tilt your chin up. Seeing you cry makes his heart split and shatter, and tears start to form in his own eyes. 

“I’m so fucking mad at you, Mingyu.” 

He bites his tongue to refrain from cracking a joke, as he normally would. Instead, he strokes the back of your hand with his thumb. “And I want to stick around, so that I can keep makin’ you mad.” 

“You promise?” You ask, searching his eyes for any hint of dishonesty. “You’re really done racing?” 

“I don’t break my promises. Not the ones that I make to you. I promise, I swear, that I’m done.”

+ + +

“Baby, it’s late. Can we just go to sleep? Please?” 

“I’m making room in your closet for my clothes, Gyu.” You scoff, pulling out another jacket. You glance over it before flipping it around, showing it to your boyfriend. “Do you wear this?” 

He furrows his brows, thinking it over before dismissing you with a wave. “Not really.” 

“Okay.” You toss the jacket into the box you’d designated for donating, dropping the hanger on the closet floor. Mingyu yawns loudly, stretching out in the middle of his bed. You know what he’s doing; he’s trying to entice you into joining him. He wants to persuade you to stop doing the task that he’d already put off for weeks in favor of crawling into his lap, maybe going to sleep or maybe not. Still, you’re not ready to quit yet. You pull out another jacket and repeat your actions, holding it in front of you for Mingyu to inspect it. 

“Donate.” 

You nod, silently agreeing with his decision. You reach back into the closet, reaching for the next jacket to pull out, but your fingers freeze when you realize what you’re touching. You pull out the leather jacket slowly – Mingyu's racing jacket. It’s the one that he was wearing the first time that you kissed him, and the second time. He wore it for your first date, claiming that it was ‘good luck,’ and he even wore it that one time that you let him fuck you against the hood of his racecar. You hold your breath as you turn around, and Mingyu’s expression darkens when he realizes what you’re holding. 

He doesn’t know how to play this. It’s been months since his accident, which means it’s been months since he quit racing. He misses it sometimes, but you’re more important to him. He lets each day drag on so long as they promise, that at sundown, he’ll be able to come back to his apartment and you’ll be waiting, smiling, happy, healthy. That jacket means a lot to him. 

“Donate.” 

You mean more to him. 

“Aw, really?” You whine, looking back down at the jacket. Mingyu scoffs and pushes himself further up on the bed, watching closely as you run your fingertips along the leather. “You looked so good when you used to wear this. I think my mouth was watering the first time we met.” 

“Fuck off.” Mingyu laughs, waving you away again. “You keep it then, angel. I looked good in the jacket because I’m good looking. Please don’t attribute my good looks to my jackets.” 

You put the jacket back into the closet regardless, finally shuffling across the room to the bed. You sigh as you let yourself fall onto the mattress, groaning as Mingyu rolls you onto your stomach and then tugs you closer to him. You let him do all the work, only shifting once he’s positioned underneath you. You let one of your hands snake underneath his shirt, resting on his abdomen and applying pressure, just for good measure. 

“Do you miss it?” You whisper, cheek smushed against his cheek. 

“Sometimes.” Mingyu whispers back, tracing shapes against your back. “I think it suited me. I was good at makin’ split-second decisions, and it worked because the only person affected by those decisions was me. And then...” He trails off, considering his next words carefully. “Then I met the love of my life, and they tried so hard to hate me and push me a—hey!” 

He whines as you pinch him, prying your hand off him. He tsks at you, shaking his head before continuing his story. “As I was saying, the love of my life wanted to push me away ‘cause they didn’t want to be attached to someone with so little regard for their own life. And I couldn’t blame them, y’know? I wasn’t happy about it, though, so I kept tryin’ and, somehow, it worked.” 

“I already know the story, Gyu.” You grumble. Still, you’ll never get tired of hearing him refer to you as the love of his life. You still have no idea how he knew, from that very first moment, that it had to be you, though. “I love you too. I don’t think I say it enough.” 

“I didn’t want this to become sappy.” He sneers, pinching your cheek. “I was actually hopin’ that you’d ride my face.” 

“I’m tired.” You yawn, replacing your hand on his chest, over his shirt, and rubbing up and down along his abdomen. “I could give you a hand job, though.” 

“Don’t want that.” Mingyu groans. 

You lift your eyebrows in surprise. Your boyfriend, turning down a hand job? You lift your hand up and press the back of it against his forehead. “You don’t have a fever, though.” 

“You’re annoying.” He scowls. “You just told me that you don’t want me to eat you out, and I’m not makin’ a big deal of it.” 

You let your hand drop from Mingyu’s forehead, tracing your fingertips along his jaw. “If we’re both tired, we can just fuck in the morning.” 

“We don’t fuck in the morning.” You offer him a quizzical look. He wraps both of his arms around you, squeezing you and rolling both of you until you’re on your back and his cheek is pressed against your stomach. “In the morning, we make love.” 

“Didn’t you call me a slut the last time that we made love?” 

He lifts his head up, narrowing his eyes at you. “You liked it.” 

“Yeah, I did.” You sigh, easing your fingers through Mingyu’s hair and forcing his head back down, onto your stomach. “Where do you think you’d be if we hadn’t met?” 

“Wildly unhappy.” He scoffs. “Dead. What about you?” 

You hum quietly, scratching against his scalp. “Probably... also unhappy. Well, I don’t think that I wasn’t happy before I met you, but I think, right now, I’m the happiest that I’ve ever been.” 

The two of you lapse into silence. The sounds of the neighborhood – dogs barking, cars honking – seep through every so often, but you hardly noticed, aware, instead, of your boyfriend’s presence. When you first met Mingyu, you knew that he would find a way to infiltrate your life, to become the oxygen that you needed to breathe. When you first met Mingyu, you felt like you were breathing and drowning at the same time. Nowadays, you don’t feel like you’re drowning, but you aren’t breathing normally, either. It’s the same for him, you’re sure; it’s all about him, even when it isn’t. You could be focused on something else, but you’ll never be able to fully attend to anything else. 

It’s for this reason that you’ve had to scold him, on so many occasions, to keep his eyes on the road when driving. He just can’t seem to focus on anything but you, and somehow, his recklessness has worn off and you find yourself in the same predicament. 

Just as you finally shut your eyes, you feel Mingyu twitching against you. 

He’s laughing. “It’s a good thing that you decided to fuck with a racer, huh?”

#mingyu x reader #kim mingyu x reader #svt x reader #mingyu scenarios #kim mingyu scenarios #svt scenarios #svt smut #seventeen smut #seventeen scenarios #hengqarae #1k #1.5k

[the-orion-scribe]

An essay on Ford and Mabel

To commemorate my 1000th post, I decided to embark on an essay on the limited Ford and Mabel bonding in the show!

Among some of the shortcomings in the show (including Wendy being chaffed as a main character), there aren’t as many moments for Ford and Mabel to bond over, compared to Ford with Dipper. Well, it’s also due to the short runway we have from A Tale of Two Stans to Weirdmageddon, but for rather odd reasons, Ford didn’t get a lot of screentime and often holed up in his own lab. Even Roadside Attraction did not even drop any mention of Ford. As a mutual lamented to me, it’s likely the case of Ford, like Wendy, being another character whom the writers had a purpose for (as the answer to the mystery of Stan and the Portal), but didn’t know how to write outside that purpose.

Of course, some argued that, for plot reasons, this is so that Mabel gets duped by Bill since she didn’t know about the Rift from Ford. Or that Ford just overlooked her when he offered Dipper the apprenticeship. As such, there is a main misconception that Ford didn’t care about Mabel at all compared to Dipper. Or, in some ridiculously extreme cases, that he hates her. While I guess this was extrapolated from what we might have gleaned in the show, I don’t agree with such extreme views.

People forget that Mabel was actually the first twin he interacted with, and it was largely positive. When Mabel stated that his six-fingered handshake was one finger friendlier than normal, Ford laughed and said he liked her. Given how much he was shunned by many others for his extra fingers, it probably warmed him to hear someone saying something positive about his anomaly. It seemed initially set up that Ford and Mabel should get along fabulously. Even Mabel went as far as to knit finger puppets for Ford and while he sounded rather hesitant in Journal 3, we later glimpsed a scene in which both bonded over something similar (a hand turkey).

Which brings me next on Ford’s journal entry about Mabel. (I also noted he interviewed, or wrote about, Mabel before Dipper). His interview with Mabel sounded largely positive given he remarked how he was “instantly charmed” by her “enthusiastic” personality. Ford also considered her as an “odd specimen” (almost certainly a compliment), and also hoped to seek her help to repair his own coat.

I suppose this interview probably shaped some initial impressions for Ford about Mabel. “Overall positive but somewhat ambivalent/not-really-comprehending how she ticks necessarily” is much of how I would define Ford’s attitude toward Mabel - he likes her, but doesn’t especially identify with her because the traits he admires in her are almost inversions of some his own.

At this stage, one could also take that with his remark in Dipper’s initial assessment about how he “possibly takes after Stanley” as Ford initially trying to identify with Mabel the way he ended up identifying with Dipper, such as him enthusiastically commenting about her sweet tooth and hair curls being a Pines trait. Of course, as it turned out in the show and in Journal 3, his perceptions of the twins shifted and he found himself relating more to Dipper especially when he looked back on Dipper’s entries and additions, and the events of Dungeons, Dungeons and More Dungeons.

I have to admit that when I first read this part, I thought he remarks he himself needed further psychological testing and not Mabel. For some light-heartedness, I rather think of it that way, but there’s something deeper in this for the two’s psychological profiles. First off, the tests were flawed, given Rorschach testing blots should be less definitive, but it probably reflected Ford’s possible lack of comfort with ambiguity, and the preoccupation he had with death and destruction for so long. As for Mabel, it shows a certain degree of wilful misinterpretation, trying to see things through a particular positive lens and has a sort of fear of unpleasantness that manifests in a possibly neurotic drive to control reality around her, which finds its ultimate expression in Mabeland.

This is rather important as something I would delve into deeper later on in this essay, which gave Ford an impression that Mabel’s psychology, while odd, was overall positive and not much to be concerned about. He clearly recognized Mabel’s social ability as a valuable skill, and may see her lack of cynicism as something of an asset too, as we later see in The Last Mabelcorn. I suppose Ford neglected to do a deeper dive into her psychology given the fallout we would see in Dipper and Mabel Vs the Future. He might claim to have 12 PHDs, but I doubted one of them is in psychology.

We move on to the Last Mabelcorn, which is where we see Ford interacted more with Mabel and offer a bigger insight into how he feels about her. First, he agreed with Mabel when she stated she was probably “the most pure of heart in the room” and entrusted her with the unicorn mission, even knowing that the unicorns were difficult (and frustrating). As such, he equipped her with Journal 1 and a crossbow for the mission. Obviously this was for her safety, as well as trying to give her as much help as he could regarding unicorns, even though he himself had little success (Ford mentioned of an arm-wrestle with a unicorn in the blacklight edition which I doubted went well). At the end of that episode, he directly told her that she is a good person, even without being aware of the struggles she had gone through with her morality moments prior. And after the episode he even regarded her as an expert on unicorns given she managed to defeat one, and allowed her to write an entry in Journal 3 about unicorns. I needed to note that Mabel was the only person who wrote in Ford’s Journal after Dipper returned Ford the Journals (and before their recovery in Weirdmageddon). This rather showed how much Ford really trusted Mabel, especially when he regarded his Journal as his “important scientific documents”.

Dipper and Mabel vs The Future is more contentious in this regard. We see how plenty of fans often using this episode as proof that Ford doesn’t care about Mabel just because he only asked Dipper to stay in Gravity Falls, and waved off concerns that Mabel would be all alone in California. However, we need to relook some bits of this in context.

Dipper: There’s also Mabel. She’d be all alone in California. Ford: Mabel will be fine on her own. She has a magnetic personality. I watched her become pen pals with the pizza delivery man in the 60 seconds he was at the door.

From this, we can see how Ford cared enough to observe Mabel’s social skills with the pizza delivery guy, plus probably witnessed plenty of instances of Mabel handling herself without Dipper’s help. I guessed that was further underlined by her success in the unicorn adventure, and thus he genuinely believed that Mabel could take being without her brother outside of the summers.

Dipper: Gosh, we’ve never really been apart before. Ford: And isn’t it suffocating? Dipper, can you honestly tell me you never felt like you were meant for something more?

This is another contentious bit, I admit. It sounded like Ford considered Mabel as a stumbling block in Dipper’s future. Well, I concede Ford isn’t perfect. Again, this is one of those times Ford was projecting his issues with Stan onto the younger twins after finding out how similar he thinks Dipper is to him (possibly aggravated probably by Stan blatantly aligning Mabel with himself, ex, telling Dipper that he belongs upstairs with “me and Mabel”). At this point, he was just extremely clueless about the nature of her and Dipper’s relationship, and how it was much healthier than his was with Stan, probably even at that age.

Nevertheless, to say that he didn’t care about Mabel at all is simply a misguided oversimplification. He cared about them both so much. His traumatic experience with his own twin just tainted how he saw the twins’ bond being something that could be potentially suffocating. He did sort of have a point though; Dipper and Mabel couldn’t force each other to stay glued at the hip forever or it could potentially stifle their individual dreams if handled badly. But the twins were only 12 and had a lot of growing up to do together. It wasn’t a great idea to separate the twins at this point, which was something Ford forgot.

Mabel wasn’t forthright about her feelings about leaving Gravity Falls and growing up until she blew up at the end of the episode. We see how she maintained that mask of optimism throughout the show, even when she was worried about the Grunkles’ falling out and the parallels she found between her and her brother back in A Tale of Two Stans. That mask began to slip when she realized growing up wasn’t as great as she thought, and Ford didn’t know how badly Mabel would take it.

Ford thought he was doing Dipper a favor by giving him a head start on his studies. This is probably a bit too charitable of an interpretation, but one could, I suppose, see Ford's “something more” remark as “Dipper more than just half of a set” instead of “implying that Mabel is in some sense inferior than her brother.” As said earlier, he even believed Mabel would be fine and thrive on her own, too. That the two could have reached a compromise if needed.

We can probably conclude that Ford actually did not disregard Mabel or see her as the "inferior twin", but he just found trouble trying to connect with her despite his initial positive impressions. At the same time, due to Mabel's outward outgoing personality, he overestimated Mabel's confidence in being on her own, and also (subconsciously) projected his own issues with Stan on the younger twins. Not to say Ford was a bad person by any means, but he was misguided in some of his assumptions and impressions.

On a tangent, I say the recent fan episode Return to the Bunker tried its best to imagine how Ford and Mabel might go on an adventure together. However, it instead exaggerated too much of his flaws (e.g. his trust issues) and it became more of a Ford bashing episode. Yes, we know Ford isn't perfect by any means, and he might be unfamiliar with interacting with others like Mabel.

Yet, as we also saw from the canon (the show supplemented by Journal 3), he could get along well with Mabel, especially in such a desperate situation like confronting a Shapeshifter (how he dismissed the others' suggestions is really beyond me). We even saw how Ford was willing to give up himself to Bill in WMG when Bill threatened to torture or even kill the kids.

I supposed the writers of that fan episode did read J3 but took the wrong lessons. While definitely an attempt to show Ford's flaws, the episode instead went the other extreme. Ford could sometimes be insensitive (like the remark he made about "suffocating"), but not anti-social or downright unpleasant.

There is definitely potential for more positive Ford and Mabel bonding moments that could further underscore that Mabel could cope well on her own (from what we saw in The Last Mabelcorn). From what @hkthatgffan also told me (and on Reddit), when Lost Legends was coming up, everyone thought, from Hirsch's hint through his emojis, that we might finally get a Ford and Mabel bonding story but instead we got an (admittedly) half-hearted attempt to redeem Mabel from her role in WMG.

I supposed another angle could be Ford and Mabel also coming to terms with their roles, given Ford is partly responsible (and even took some blame himself), and both can overcome the trauma together. I don't doubt these are already concepts being explored in various fanfics and fanarts. And here are some other ideas from Reddit.

Let me end off with some parallel scenes between Ford and Mabel, which show how similar both are. We need to also remember that it's not exactly Dipper-Ford and Mabel-Stan, but rather Dipper and Mabel paralleling each of the Stans in different ways. That is probably another essay for another time.

This essay is written with assistance from @jacky-rubou (who already provided an initial essay for me to work from) and @callipraxia who is able to offer more insights.

#gravity falls #essay #ford pines #mabel pines #thousandth post #stanford pines

[reddje]

losers fic writers what are ur losers middle names since they don’t have canonical last names 🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️

i’ve been writing losers club / it fics for seven years so i’ve had plenty of time to perfect their middle names so here they are

eddie

eddie’s middle name when i write him is always isaiah. it’s biblical, it’s pretty, and i just think eddie’s mom is very much about pretty perfect things and edward isaiah kaspbrak is just a pretty little name

richie

alwaysssss wentworth! always! richard wentworth tozier is so ingrained into my mind that it’s almost canon to me. i just think wentworth and maggie are the type to name their kids after themselves and when richie was born they were like okay cute, little boy, dads name as his middle name.

stan

i think stanley asher is so cute and it’s also a popular name in hebrew and it goes well with his last name so i do love it. truth be told i did do a little digging when i was 14 and needing a middle name for stan and asher was one of the names that kept showing up on popular jewish names websites so it kinda just stuck w me. stanley asher uris ur so famous to me <3

bill

william henry 🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️ william henry denbrough 🤷‍♀️ and georgie’s middle name is james, even though he’s the only one with a canonical middle name 😭

mike

mikes middle name is william bc it’s his dads name , but i also think he could’ve been named “michael leroy hanlon” after his grandfather. i tend to go with william though !

ben

benjamin alexander!!! so so cutie pie just like he is.

bev

beverly grace just screams at me idk. i just feel like her dad would’ve picked it, and she hates it, but richie found out about it and calls her by it all the time and it’s grown on her hearing him call her it. (bc they’re bffs)

#it 2019 #eddie kaspbrak #it #it chapter two #richie tozier #it movies #it stephen king #reddie #beverly marsh #stanley uris #bill denbrough #mike hanlon #ben hanscom #georgie denbrough #losers club hc #reddie headcanon #losers headcanon #it headcanons

[riveatstoes]

the idea of finn wolfhard’s roles being somehow related has been beaten to death already but i do enjoy the concept of richie tozier and mike wheeler being twins separated when they were young, and then being forced to endure their own interdimensional horrors with their groups of Loser Buddies.

i also like the idea of how they’d react to each other’s aforementioned interdimensional horrors. personally i think if richie had to deal with anything remotely upside-down related he’d Flip The Fuck Out and just scream a lot. if he came face to face with a demogorgon he’d try to hit it with a baseball bat or a stick or something, and then max or lucas (or maybe even el) would have to go out of their way to save him from his own dipshit decisions.

alternatively i believe that pennywise would be a cakewalk for mike and the party. mike would simply hit it with the “it’s not my fault you don’t like girls 🙄” and it’d be so confused it would have no choice but to back off. i also am a firm believer that if the losers club had max with them they would’ve fully defeated pennywise in the first movie. she would’ve figured out the “make it small” shit SO FAST.

at her core max mayfield is a Thirteen Year Old Girl and i applaud her for it. i love her.

anyway i’m working on my own twins!richie and mike fanfic so we’ll see how that goes. i don’t want to post it before i have something super solid because i have a tendency to abandon fics if they don’t interest me enough the entire time. we’ll see.

bonus—some stranger things/IT pairings that i want to see more of in crossover fics:

STANLEY AND WILL!!!!!!!!! trust me

bev and el

dustin and richie

if you’re gonna do the bev/max thing i also strongly suggest doing lucas/ben as well because what’s the point of writing the ginger girlbosses without their Stupid Goofy Men?

bill and mike w

idk i just feel like eddie k would just hate eddie munson. crossover where the losers club have to climb through that portal in the munsons’ trailer and eddie k refuses purely because of the state of eddie m’s mattress

i get the feeling that stanley would be the one constantly being stuck with steve and robin and forced into ridiculous tasks. imagine the stranger things 3 russian elevator scene but instead of dustin trying to set up robin and steve it’s just stan uris panic-reciting bird species

stan’s first thought would be “oh she has a bird name :) nice” and then the rest is “what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck”

honestly any pairing other than reddie/byler because even though i love those boys to death it’s just so OBVIOUS atp

and also i can appreciate that they’d relate to each other but mike hanlon and lucas is far from the best mike h pairing. for example imagine him being stuck with (throws dart at board of ST character names) murray

erica sinclair and eddie kaspbrak world domination

adding onto the richie/mike twin thing the idea of nancy having to adjust to +1 brother is both funny and interesting to me. i think she’d lose it one way or another

jonathan byers and bill denbrough guilty older brothers bond

also imagine hopper reacting to a Second Mike being in his general vicinity. i think that would force him off the edge, ESPECIALLY after getting to know richie

#it 2017 #stranger things #finn wolfhard #richie tozier #mike wheeler #bill denbrough #beverly marsh #eddie kaspbrak #mike hanlon #stanley uris #ben hanscom #eleven hopper #max mayfield #lucas sinclair #will byers #dustin henderson #steve harrington #robin buckley #nancy wheeler #jonathan byers #eddie munson #murray bauman #jim hopper #erica sinclair #byler #reddie

[nexus-my-beloved]

This isn't my usual content but I recently (four days ago) decided to read the actual book for IT so here's a couple of headcanons (specifically centred around 1990 IT, but I'll specify which years just in case):

-1990 Eddie likely had severe anxiety around showers and baths after the time he saw Pennywise in the gym locker room showers. He probably always had a fear of the clown stretching open the drain again and reaching to grab him and drag him into the sewers. Eddie is afraid of disease and germs, though, conditioned to it, so he still took showers and baths- but he probably scrubbed hard enough to make his skin red and raw and he did it fast before rushing out, always racing against an invisible clock that when the timer was up Pennywise would grab him. This fear probably carried over to adulthood, even when he forgot about Derry, and he likely got better with it but probably still was afraid for some unknown reason- he probably took ten minute showers, fifteen at most.

-1990 Reddie headcanon: when they were kids, Richie probably had a small crush on Eddie, but he likely had more feelings for Stanley (1990 Stozier truther here but also universal Reddie enjoyer). When they were adults, though, Richie probably grew out of his feelings for Stanley and I like to think he had more feelings for Eddie that resurfaced the moment he saw him. Eddie probably liked Richie a lot when they were adults, but probably wasn't very big on him when they were kids.

-1990 Stenbrough headcanon: for years after Derry, Bill probably would say random bird species when he was anxious. He wouldn't remember who this was from or realize it was from one of his best friends until he got back to Derry, and that friend was dead. Bill likely held on hope that Stan would come, and probably felt his heart bleed a bit when he realized Stan had killed himself. He never got to fess up to the little crush he used to have.

-2019 Reddie headcanon: based on the fact that Eddie yelled "I knew it! I fucking knew it!" when they were leaving the restaurant after Richie admitted to not writing his own material, I like to think that Eddie probably watched this comedian he recognized but didn't know from where on TV and swore up and down the material was scripted from someone other than him. He didn't recognize the Tozier standup guy until he got the phone call from Mike and realized it was Richie "Trashmouth" Tozier from when he was a kid. Eddie probably kept tabs and watched Richie for years without ever realizing that used to be his best friend.

-2017 Bill Denbrough headcanon: I like to think that Bill particularly stuttered on s-words. Which means he probably stuttered like hell whenever he'd have to say Stan/Stanley sometimes. Imagine how he'd have to use nicknames instead, silly or not, and how much more important it'd be when he said just Stanley, even if it was hard.

-All Media Bill Denbrough: there's no way he could've looked at paper boats without feeling like crying. Even as an adult he probably couldn't explain it. He'd just cry.

I probably have more but I think this is a big enough post for tonight. Have these I found on Pinterest!

The sillies <3

Bowers Gang Slander but it gets progressively worse/better (depends how you see it)

Abso-fuckin-lutely it is them. I can imagine little 2017 Eddie running after Finn Wolfhard Richie with inhaler in hand and trying to keep up while Richie laughs his ass off and promptly smacks his face into an open locker and eats shit

Twink Eddie <3

In all fairness though I love adult 1990 Eddie. He looks like the embodiment of if kindness were a human being and he just makes me so happy I would hug this man and love him forever I want to keep him in my pocket

#it 1990 #it 2017 #it 2019 #eddie kaspbrak #richie tozier #stanley uris #bill denbrough #headcanons #it stephen king #not my usual content #i just have been on an IT kick lately

[t4tozier]

an extension of this post for @peachtozier aka losers band au <3

okay first off let’s start with who plays what

richie: drums. i said a lot of my thoughts in the original post but i think he really takes a shine to it and ends up being so so good at the drums. he’s the one that gets the most slow-mo edits made of him by fans because he’s got the long hair and the sweat and he dumps water on his face in the middle of songs because he doesn’t have time to drink it.

bill: lead singer and songwriter. he gets a lot of attention because of it which the others always tease him about until he turns red. his stutter goes away when he sings and new fans are always shocked when he talks for the first time at one of the concerts because they don’t expect to hear it. he writes most of the lyrics, but richie occasionally helps out if he has a specific idea.

mike: keys, backup vocals/instruments. he’s kind of a jack of all trades, knows how to play a little bit of everything, so he’s the one that will take over if someone else has to tap out for a show or if they just need a break on a song that doesn’t require piano. very good at taking cues from others when they deviate from the studio versions during concerts.

bev: bass guitar and backup vocals.

sorry i blacked out for a moment thinking about bev playing bass. anyway. she whips out these killer basslines like it’s nothing. she likes basing some of her work on famous riffs but she always puts her own spin on it to make it something new. thrives on improvisation.

eddie: lead guitar. i just think he deserves to shred. he can let his energy out on the heavier songs but also switch it up and play a lovely ballad on the acoustic guitar. he’s not great at improv but will provide a steady riff as a base while the others do their thing.

stan: band manager. he’s very professional and polished when communicating with venues and sponsors but when they all show up nobody can tell which one is him because he’s just as goofy as the rest of them. he’ll be dancing along to tiffany or whatever random song they put on as their warmup in the green room and lip syncing over a can of soda with richie and then some assistant comes in to knock on the door and he clears his throat and straightens up and is like thank you ten :)

ben: roadie/techie. he comes up with all the cool lighting cues, the set design, and is the one to go over the stage before a gig to make sure that it’s structurally sound and everything they want to do will be safe at the venue. he also carries some of their heavier equipment, helps richie load the drum kit onto the stage, etc.

okay this is gonna become a longer au bc this post is already too long <3

#suburban decline au #band au #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #reddie #stan uris #stanley uris #beverly marsh #bev marah #mike hanlon #bill denbrough #ben hanscom #the losers club #connor tag

[veintrry]

how he messes with you.

kaeya &/x gn!reader, fluff, teasing, just joking around together, can be rom or platonic, kinda implicitive at the end. I ACCIDENTSLLY WROTW A WHOLE SCENARIO FFS

an: im finally writing something for kaeya for the first time finally holy crap. TO KAEYA STANS, ILY, MARRY ME, MÍ BELLEZAS <3 🫶

i know that without a doubt of my mind he surprises you with his body temperature. You could be minding your business, but know that you are NEVER safe. If he sees an opportunity he will attack. A hand will crawl up your back, and he'll make sure you feel his fingers lightly touching your skin, leaving feathery sensations. However, that is only a warning as for what is to come, because he always. Always. Immediately plants his hand flat against you, just to snicker as he looks at your reaction to his ice cold hand. "Oh, I'm sorry. It seems my hand moved on its own."

The man is flirty, WE KNOW!! MOVE ON!! What about when you flirt back? I've been a true believer in the fact that he'd be taken aback at first only to begin a competition between you two as to who can say the cheesiest stuff or get flustered. Sometimes it gets to a point you guys literally call each other the corniest shit, "Honey bun" "Pookie bear" just in hopes of getting the other to throw in the towel, but it never works.

"Oh, you're making me melt, dear."

"Is that so? Then I should keep you in my arms so you don't collapse."

"Can you do this anywhere but here." Diluc hates having to witness your interactions all the time, he has the most scrutinising astounded face one could make.

> Catching him off-guard isn't exactly impossible, you've realise the way to do it isn't just intentionally being flirty, but giving him genuine compliments and kind gestures out of sheer will. Though he pretends like it has no affect on him, throwing you another sugar coated line of his, "I didn't know you felt so passionately about me, I'm glad. I'll do my best to match you then, hm."

I'm putting this in for my sake; flustered kaeya is a masterpiece. I think if the day comes when you get to see that man unable to gather himself is the day you know the Anemo Archon truly has bestowed upon you the best luck. Maybe the kind act of paying that bards bill served good purpose.

Kaeya's face would be a beauty to look at. It always is, but right now you wish you had a Kamera so you could keep this expression of his saved with you forever. Eye wide, as his icy glacial orb hold your figure in their reflection. His mouth agape, you can see how his mind is attempting to scramble for words, something to say- anything. There's a mix of an orange and red hue coating his cheeks, but the tips of his ears are on flames and you're glad that he ties his hair back because you get to see just how he looks. For the first time, Kaeya breaks eye contact, averting his gaze anywhere else as he coughs into his hand before turning it into a nervous chuckle. He attempts to use his hand as a cover for his face as he swallows thickly, attempting to collect himself. As if you'd allow that.

Grabbing the wrist of the hand that hides his flawless expression from you, you peer over to him and he stares at you, focused, his mouth pursed into a thin line as though he was upset with you despite not putting up a fight when you stepped closer. You gleam as you notice the small details of his face, his lashes fluttering softly, his eye lids narrowing onto you, the hair that frames his face failing to hide his emotions. You chuckle, "What a pretty muse you are.".

That seems to snap him out of it. He turns back into a coughing fit, before facing you again, that seductively menacing grin on his face again, but something is amiss; his eye tells a different tale, one that contradicts his confident stance. "Oh? I'm your muse, am I? If that's the case then how about we take this elsewhere and I'll offer you some inspiration."

#kaeya genshin impact #kaeya headcanons #kaeya fluff #kaeya x reader #kaeya x gender neutral reader #kaeya x y/n #kaeyagenshinimpact #kaeya being kaeya #genshin impact kaeya #diluc suffering

[clementine-writes-things]

Cara Mia - E.N

(This is about Paul Dano's Riddler, welcome Dano stans, welcome to my sinful blog and prepare for filthy and in-depth writing <3 if you're new here, all you need to know is that we LOVE including music in our fanfics and we LOVE realistic/detailed writing <3 you'll see what I mean and you'll love it sweetie)

Summary: Y/n and Edward were old friends who grew up in the same orphanage together. Not liking the person he is becoming, she tries to get him to find other ways to defend Gotham's civilians. Strangely, she succeeds in this. But, Edward still wants to show them how confident he has gotten since they last saw each other. (crappy summary, just read this post lol.)

Word count (everything below cut): 14,462 (GUYS WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED I THINK I WENT INTO A TRANCE WRITING THIS THING?! WHY IS IT 5 YEARS LONG!? PLEASE DON'T LET THIS FLOP I'LL MOVE TO ANTARTICA IF IT DOES I WORKED SO HARD ON THIS!!!)

Content Warning: AFAB!Reader, she/they pronouns (using mostly she for easier narrative purposes but Edward refers to y/n as they), non-binary reader, queer reader, mentions of homophobia, body dysmorphia, gender dysmorphia, transphobia, explicit language, panic attack, mentions of cigarettes, slowburn smut, penetration, mocking during sex, degrading/humiliation, praising, power play, ROUGH sex, slapping, dom!Edward, obsessed!Edward, sub!Reader, threats of violence directed towards y/n, angst, mentions of gore and murder, y/n is an artist in this <3, breaking in (ed breaks in to y/n's apartment), ed gets angry a lot, aftercare.

Songs for Inspo: (highly recommend you listen while reading (not in any particular order tbh)) bro i spent like 30 minutes finding the PERFECT songs that gave off the vibes I wanted Edward to have in this fic...pls appreciate D:

Aleph - Gesaffelstein

Anarchy - KMFDM

Something In The Way - Nirvana (not bc it was in the movie, it's just so aesthetically pleasing for this type of fic)

THIRST FOR ME! - Lumi Athena

YOU'RE TOO SLOW (Bonus) - Odetari

all I want is you - Rebzyyx, hoshie star

NALGOTICA! - Lumi Athena

Daydream In Blue - I Monster

MONTAGEM - PR FUNK - S3BZS

Lacrimosa - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

Y/n's songs:

mos thoser - food house

Ride - Sir-Mix-A-Lot

ecstasy (slowed) - SUICIDAL-IDOL

~*Read Below Cut*~

"Uh, yeah may I have an iced coffee please? With almond milk please."

The customer handed over a 10 dollar bill. Y/n smiled from behind the counter, nodding her head. She entered the purchase and gave the customer their change. Y/n's hair was put back in a ponytail that stuck out of her work visor. Going to grab a cup, she stopped, laughing softly. Turning to the customer, she tilted her head.

"Sorry, Ms. Andrews, what size did you want? I know you usually get a grande, but I just want to make sure." She asked politely.

The older woman, near her mid 40's chuckled. She swatted her slender hand at y/n playfully. Her nails were painted a bright pink with white polka dots, a suggestion from y/n herself. Earlier last week Ms. Andrews had asked for an idea of what to paint her nails. Y/n told her to go big and bold, have some fun! And, that's exactly what she did.

"Oh, y/n you are so kind. A grande is fine as always." She smiled.

Y/n nodded, grabbing the clear cup and scooping some ice into it. The woman placed a 5 dollar bill in the tip jar, which caused y/n to grin dorkily. It was only her working tonight, so she really appreciated the gratuity. Especially coming from one of her favorite customers.

"So, almond milk? What happened to oat? Are you trying something different?" She asked, making light conversation as she made the drink.

"Oh, nothing like that. I really love oatmilk in my coffee, but I find that it upsets my stomach. It's a shame really."

"Aw, well almond milk is a good choice!" Y/n replied cheerfully.

Placing the drink down, the woman smiled at her. Yawning, she covered her mouth with her hand. Y/n chuckled at the sight, wiping down the counter once Ms. Andrews took her drink. The smell of the cleaner filled the air, mixing with strong coffee beans and fruity mixtures. It was pungent, but the ceiling fan helped distribute it and filter it out.

"Get home safe, y/n. Gotham isn't safe for anyone, let alone a sweet person like you." The woman warned.

Y/n nodded at Ms. Andrews. Focusing back down to the counter, she waved good bye to the woman, watching out of the corner of her eye as she left the shop. Sighing, y/n rubbed a bead of sweat off of her forehead. She groaned, looking up at the clock. It was 11:55 p.m. Her shift ended in 5 minutes, and everything was all clean except for the utensils she just used. Getting right to work, she began to clean the dishes, zoning out as she did so. Thoughts of her childhood raced through her head, causing her to feel somber. It wasn't much of a childhood, growing up in an orphanage. But, she did have one friend.

~

"Eddie, I don't know the answer! Give me Sir Clawdius back!" Y/n groaned.

Edward, being taller than her by a few inches already, stood on top of a bucket. In his hands was y/n's teddy bear, well, the orphanage's teddy bear. Y/n decorated it however, giving it a makeshift crown made out of pipe cleaners, glue, and those colorful puffy cotton balls. Sticking his tongue out, he blew a raspberry at y/n.

"Nah uh! You gotta answer the riddle!" He explained.

"Ugh, fine! What was it again?" She asked, crossing her arms over her chest in a pout.

The two of them, being 11 years old at the time, looked like bickering 5 year olds. Edward had met y/n in the orphanage when they were 7, and they quickly became close friends. Y/n was always the hyper one who got into trouble easily, and Edward was the one who tried to help her wiggle her way out of it. He was definitely the smarter one out of the duo.

"What do you call a bear with no teeth?" He asked, waving the bear in the air.

"Be careful with him, he's a delicate soul!" She whined.

He chuckled awkwardly, holding it still above his head. Y/n looked at the ground, thinking hard about the riddle. She knew that it wasn't that hard, but she always had a difficult time with riddles. Perhaps, it was just because she was under pressure. Her eyes widened, snapping her fingers and bouncing up and down lightly.

"A gummy bear!" She giggled.

Jumping down, Edward handed her Sir Clawdius. Smiling, she grabbed the bear and held it close to her chest. Edward gave her a thumbs up, a big grin on his face.

"Hey, you're getting better, sketcher!" He cheered.

Y/n giggled when he called her that. The nickname was stupid, not making any sense to anyone else but them. The shoes that she wore all the time were sketchers, and she loved to draw. So, Edward, being a genius, came up with that intelligent nickname. The two of them both agreed it wasn't the most clever, but they both liked it either way. So, it stuck.

"Well, you give me lots of opportunities to improve, Riddles." She chuckled.

~

The dishes were all dry and put away as she finished thinking about her old friend. She still had a hard time believing that the little boy he once was was now planning the demise of Gotham. It was definitely jarring, and it was obvious that it was him. She knew Edward well, no one ever loved riddles as much as he did. If someone did, then that would be the day that pigs flew.

"Time to lock up..." She sighed.

Grabbing her tote bag, she hung it on her shoulder. She turned all of the lights off and made sure everything was put away and turned off. Once she was done, she grabbed the lanyard attached to her pants and locked the backdoor. She set the alarm for the building and quickly made her way out, locking the front door behind her. Shivering, she started to walk down the street, lucky that she only lived a block away. Snow fell down from the sky, landing on her eyelashes, disappearing once she blinked them away.

"Fucking shit it's cold out here." She mumbled to herself, rubbing her hands together.

She sped up her walking pace, ignoring how much her feet hurt from standing behind the counter all night. Not only did she want to get out of the bone-chilling cold, but she also wanted to get out of the streets of Gotham at night. Especially so close to the Narrows. No part of Gotham was safe, but the closer to the Narrows you got, the more dangerous it became. Y/n's mouth stretched out, forming an 'O' as she yawned harshly. Tears formed in the corner of her eyes, blinking them away rapidly.

"God, I'm fucking tired. Thankfully, it's Friday! This bitch doesn't work weekends for a reason." She quietly cheered.

Turning the corner, she sighed in relief when her apartment building came into view. Speeding up even more, she went inside of it, feeling like someone was watching her as she did so. Shrugging it off, she made her way up the stairs until she reached the floor she resided on. Reaching her door, she unlocked it and stepped inside, closing and locking it behind her. Standing still for a few moments, she dropped her tote bag on the table next to the door. She was too lazy to put it anywhere else. Groaning, she walked into her bedroom, stripping herself of her work clothes immediately. She made quick work of getting a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie on, humming to herself when the warmth of the fabric embraced her body. Not feeling fully 'swaddled', y/n slid on a pair of fluffy socks as well. She felt like a sheep who desperately needed it's wool to be shaved off. And, after walking in that cold, she was totally ok with that feeling.

'bing!'

Y/n grabbed her phone off of her bed, tossing it there when she was changing. Turning it on, the light illuminated her face as she read the notification. She pinched the bridge of her nose, groaning as she did so. Pushing the notification, she entered her pin number and grumbled to herself as a livestream opened.

"Hello, my loyal followers! Apologies, for such a late livestream..." Edward announced.

Y/n rolled her eyes, immediately typing in chat. She did not watch his livestreams because she believed in what he was doing. Well, she agreed with his thoughts, that corruption was taking over Gotham and that a change needed to be made. But, it was how exactly he was doing it that she didn't agree with. Plotting murders, wanting to blow up the sea walls, seeking attention from The Batman. He had not done any of these things yet, thankfully. But, just the fact that he had been planning and discussing it was disturbing to her. It was insane. Her fingers typed away, almost as if they knew what they needed to do without her brain telling them. However, she knew what would happen if she sent the message. But, she needed to. She wanted to get through to him.

'Riddles, you've got to stop this. You're taking this too far. There are better ways in which you can advocate for Gotham. And you know it. Seeing you like this breaks my heart. It's getting hard to watch these livestreams. - Sketcher.'

Edward, who was in the middle of talking, fell silent almost immediately. Y/n saw his eyes dart around behind his glasses, reading the message. He panted slightly, shaking his head vigorously. Scoffing, y/n shook her head as well, knowing what was about to happen.

"You don't understand! This is the ONLY way! We experienced this cities torment first hand! THIS IS THE ONLY WAY! Why don't you trust me, Sketch? Hm? All of my noble followers trust me. They KNOWWWW I can bring JUSTICE for them!" He shouted, his voice frantic and borderline desperate.

'God, someone find that buzzkill and kill them already...'

Edward's eyes widened as he read that chat. Y/n chuckled lightly, placing her phone on her bed, preparing for the tantrum that was about to ensue. Grabbing a hairbrush off her nightstand, she started to brush her hair, listening to her old friend scream.

"If you do that, I WILL know. And I WILL FIND YOU AND GUT YOU LIKE A FISH! I WILL FLAAAAY YOUR BODY AND SHOVE YOUR PEELED SKIN DOWN YOUR THROAT!" He shouted, his voice peaking in the livestream.

For the past few weeks, y/n had been watching his live streams. Every time he had one, she would leave a message, and he became obsessed with proving himself to her. In his mind, y/n was the one person who didn't believe in him. She was the one person he really needed validation from. Y/n sighed, placing the brush down. Quickly, she typed a response and hit send. Edward's eyes immediately scanned it, ignoring everyone else in the chat. His priority was y/n. He read the message out loud quietly.

"I'm going to bed now, it's been a long day. I'm starting to give up on you. You're not the same person you we- WHAT?!?! IS ANOTHER DAY IN YOUR BORING BLAND LIFE TOO DIFFICULT FOR YOU? I AM THE SAME PERSON I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN! THE ONLY DIFFERENCE IS I HAVE FOUND MY PURPOSE!!!!!" He screamed once again, causing y/n to laugh.

Even though this was sad for her to witness, it was amusing to see him throw his tantrums. Steam was practically blowing out of his ears. If y/n was anyone else, she would be scared to death right now. But, she was y/n. She was Sketcher. And, even though Edward had changed a lot over the years, one thing would always remain the same. He would never hurt her. Y/n knew that Edward knew where she lived, and he has never once tried to go to her house. Though, y/n did worry about that every now and then. Not because she was worried he would hurt her, but because she didn't know if she could handle seeing her old friend so different.

"DON'T YOU DARE LEAVE! YOU are my INSPIRATION! My MUSE!" He exclaimed, laughing at the end of his sentence.

She scoffed, exiting the livestream. Once she did this, and Edward noticed, his face fell flat. The chat kept filling up with messages, but he just ignored them. When the chat got too overwhelming, he just ended the livestream without saying anything. He paced his room, back and forth, muttering to himself. Y/n still didn't understand him, even after preaching his cause every time she joined a livestream. He ripped his mask off, tossing it on his bed. His breathing got heavy as he started to hyperventilate. His chest heaved, causing him to stop pacing and sit down. Edward gripped at his hair, tugging lightly. When his breathing slowed down, he put his glasses back on, grabbing them from off of the floor. Sighing deeply, he cleared his throat and stood up.

"I need to see her in person. If I explain it in person, she'll understand. She has to. She has to understand!"

Frustrated, Edward got ready for bed. He was tired, and glad that he didn't have to work tomorrow. His eyes grew heavy as his head hit the pillow, drifting off into sleep as he thought of ways to show y/n that what he was trying to do was a good thing. That it was for her.

Y/n sat up in her bed, arms stretching out slowly as she yawned. A long and exaggerated groan left her throat as she rubbed her eyes, sleep in the corners of them. Looking outside of the window next to her bed, she watched as snow fell down, covering the railing of the fire escape. Y/n held her hand up to her face, breathing into it. She grimaced, displeased with her morning breath. Getting out of her bed, she slid on her slippers which were one of those animal kinds. She found unicorn ones at a store and just had to buy it. However, they seemed bland to her. So, she decided to make two fake cigarettes using some felt and cotton, sewing them to the unicorns mouth on each slipper. Y/n didn't even smoke cigarettes, she just thought it would be funny. And it was. So, mission accomplished.

"Shit, it's getting so cold out lately. It's Spring for fuck sake." She grumbled, going to the kitchen.

Opening her fridge, she scanned over her options. She didn't have much food, as she needed to do some grocery shopping. But, she did have enough to last her a couple more days. Sighing, she grabbed some leftover pizza from the other day and decided that it was the best thing she had for breakfast options. Well, she had other options, she just didn't want to cook anything. She planned on being a lazy shit today, and she was going to do exactly that. Placing the slice of pizza on a plate, she put it in the microwave for 30 seconds. While she waited, she took her daily medication, drinking the pills down with juice because if she used water she could taste the gross medicine. A beeping signaled that the pizza was warmed up.

"I'm so hungry..." She said, stomach growling.

She grabbed the pizza from the microwave, recoiling slightly because it was hotter than she expected. Apparently, 30 seconds was too much time. She would take note of that for future use. As if she had been starved for two weeks straight, y/n ate the pizza hungrily. Sighing, she washed the plate and dried it before putting it away again. Rubbing her eyes once again, she got rid of any remaining sleep that crusted in her eyes.

"Ok, time to relax."

'bing!'

"Oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me..." She mumbled.

Picking up her phone, she walked to the bathroom in her bedroom. She pushed the notification and propped it against her mirror as she grabbed her toothbrush. Edward, well, his persona at least, appeared on screen. His trademark green mask underneath a pair of clear glasses. Y/n shook her head softly, applying toothpaste to her brush before wetting it under the faucet. As Edward said hello to the people joining, y/n started to brush her teeth. Honestly, she had no idea why she joined the livestream. Perhaps it was her naivety that made her think he could change, but she still wanted to believe. Even if it wasn't looking so positive for her.

"Greeting, my loyalists. Your savior is here." He said flamboyantly.

Y/n rolled her eyes, spitting the mixture of water, spit, and toothpaste out of her mouth into the sink. She turned the water on, washing it down the drain. She rinsed her toothbrush off, putting it back where she got it from. Moving her head under the water, she took a small sip, swirling it in her mouth before spitting it out.

"He thinks he's royalty or some shit. It's so fucking annoying." She grumbled, grabbing her mouthwash.

Y/n decided not to text anything in the stream today, not wanting to deal with a tantrum again. She took a swig of the mouthwash, swishing it in her mouth. The strong mint smell and taste filled her senses, causing her eyes to water and mouth to burn slightly. Not able to handle it much longer, she spat it out. She rinsed out the sink once again, drying her hands afterwards. Y/n brought the hand towel up to her face, wiping off excess toothpaste.

"Sketcher. I know you're in here. Why aren't you saying anything?" He asked in a low tone, eyes narrowing behind his glasses.

Y/n brought the towel away from her face, hanging it back up on the hook next to the mirror. She picked up her phone, walking out of the bathroom and turning the light off behind her.

"Are you ignoring me?" His voice was hoarse, a hint of confusion lacing his question.

Y/n groaned, plopping herself down on the couch. She didn't want to listen to him anymore. He was becoming obsessed with her. Though, he had been acting like that since she watched his very first livestream. Part of y/n knew that it was because he wanted to prove himself to her, although she had no idea why. And another part of y/n knew, or at least believed, that Ed missed their friendship. To be fair, she missed their friendship too. It didn't necessarily end, more so evolved into something more. The two of them got an apartment together when they were forced to leave the orphanage after turning 18. It was difficult, but they managed. Living together caused them to share many life-changing moments of each other's lives together. Y/n remembered them so fondly, and she was sure Edward did too. However, one key moment stood out to y/n a lot more than all the other memories.

~ TW: gender dysmorphia, body dysmorphia.~

~

"Y/n, I'm back from work. They kept me late and wouldn't even explain to me why. Just wanted me to work longer, I suppose. But, at least I still got paid!" Edward said, walking in the front door of the apartment and locking it behind him.

He turned around, looking at the living room in the center of their apartment. His eyebrows furrowed as he didn't see y/n. Placing his keys in the bowl on the table next to the door, he hummed to himself. Removing his coat, he hung it up on the rack and removed his shoes.

"Are you in here?" He called out, slightly louder than before.

"Y-Yeah." Y/n responded, faintly.

Edward, who was looking at the door to her room, moved his sight to his door. Y/n's voice came from behind it, which confused him. Walking towards his door, he knocked on it lightly.

"Uh, why are you in my room?" He asked.

"Oh, I thought I lost my ph-phone charger in here. But, it's not in here." She answered.

Edward turned the doorknob, sighing in frustration as it didn't budge. He leaned up against his doorframe, shoulder resting on the surface. Crossing his arms over his chest, he looked down and saw her shadow move in the light that emitted from the gap of the door.

"Why is the door locked?" He asked bluntly.

Y/n didn't answer. Instead they stepped away from the door. Not sure what to do or say, she tried to pick up the mess she had made. Edward knew how to pick locks, thanks to growing up in an orphanage and trying to sneak dessert constantly. He would get inside eventually, and she didn't want him to see anything. Edward grimaced from behind the door, grabbing a bobby pin from his pocket. He tended to fidget a lot at work and he liked to play with a bobby pin. It was strange, but he found it soothing. He made swift work of picking the lock, which wasn't hard since it was not a complex lock at all. Opening the door, he pushed it open all the way, standing in the middle of it. Y/n froze, arms full of Edward's clothing, wearing one of his tank tops and a pair of his jeans. A bright red hue covered her cheeks as she made eye contact with her friend. At first, Edward just thought y/n was playing a light prank on him, just like they did in the orphanage. But, her eyes were watery and puffy. Her bottom lip was pulled down in a soft frown.

"Y/n? What are you doing?" He asked softly.

Y/n grabbed a blanket off of Edward's bed and pulled it over herself. Her figure under the blanket shook softly as she tried to contain soft sobs. Edward was perplexed by the scene before him, unsure of what to make of it.

"Don't look at me! Please, just get out!" She cried softly.

Edward, who was still standing in the doorway, walked over to her. He knelt down, reaching out to grab the blanket. Y/n scooted away, feeling his hand brush against the fabric. Edward slowly pulled his hand away. He sighed, looking around his room, hoping to get an understanding of what was happening. Y/n was known to have a few episodes regarding her childhood trauma, but they were nothing like this. They were never like this. This was very different. And Edward hated the feeling of not knowing what was wrong with his friend. His eyes landed on a few pieces of y/n's clothing, which he assumed is what she wore before. The rest of the clothes on the floor were his own.

"Why are you wearing my clothes?" He asked.

Y/n sniffled, poking her head out from under the blanket. Edward looked into her eyes, feeling his heart throb at her sad appearance. She sighed softly, removing the blanket from her entire body. Edward looked over her, other than the fact that she was wearing his clothes, nothing was out of the ordinary. Except...

Y/n covered her chest with her arms, trying to make it look like she was casually crossing her arms. Edward's eyes narrowed. The two of them were extremely close, and none of them were worried about the other looking at them in a creepy way. So, the fact that y/n was purposefully covering her chest set off some alarms in Edward's head. He paused for a moment, and then it clicked. Softly, he grabbed y/n's arms, pulling them away from her chest. He looked at it, noticing an extremely big difference. Y/n started to cry, hiding her face from him. Edward didn't look at his best friend's chest a lot. Not ever. He wasn't a creep. But, he knew that y/n was fairly heavy in the chest. And right now, she wasn't. He grabbed the bottom of his tank top that she was wearing, looking to her for permission. She didn't make eye contact with him, but Edward took her silence as confirmation. Lifting it up, he immediately winced. Y/n was not wearing a bra. Instead, her breasts were crudely duct-taped to her chest. The tape went around her entire chest, around her back, and connected in one loop, overlapping multiple times. The duct-tape dug into her skin harshly.

"Y/n..." He trailed.

"It hurts, Eddie..." She sobbed.

"I need to get this off of you." He stated, standing up.

Y/n reached out, grabbing his arm.

"No. I d-don't want to see th-em..." She choked.

He looked down at her, feeling his heart shatter. Edward already had a pretty good understanding of what happened while he was gone. But, that comment was what really set it in stone for him. He sighed, squatting back down and looking her in the eyes.

"You don't have to. But, I need to get this off of you." He said.

Y/n sniffled, wiping tears away from under her eyes. She nodded, pulling her knees to her chest as Edward grabbed some scissors from the kitchen. He felt stupid in this moment, not knowing exactly what to do. And, he always knew what to do. Panicking, he grabbed a bottle of aloe vera from the medicine cabinet and anti-bacterial ointment, just in case the duct tape broke her skin. Hurriedly, he went back in his room and placed the items on his bed. He bent over and picked y/n up, placing her on the bed as well. Edward got on his knees in front of her, noticing that she was avoiding eye contact with him. He grabbed the pair of scissors, placing a comforting hand on her knee.

"I will not look, y/n. I promise." He reassured.

Y/n nodded softly, a tear rolling down her cheek. Edward frowned, looking at the duct tape and trying to figure out where to start. Sighing, he looked at the part of y/n's cleavage that provided a gap to cut at. Using the scissors, he snipped a line down the middle before placing the scissors back on the bed. Just like he promised, he looked away as he lightly began to pull at the tape, wincing every time y/n flinched.

"Are you going to tell me why exactly you did this to yourself?" He asked, his voice undeniably stern.

Y/n looked out the window, Edward following her gaze as he continued to pull gently at the tape. She shrugging slightly, not sure of what to say. There was no way to say it other than to be blunt. But, she couldn't bring herself to be blunt.

"I don't like how I...I don't like my...I just wish..." She fumbled.

Edward listened, allowing her to take as much time as she needed. He ripped off a piece of duct tape slowly, crumpling it into a ball and throwing it on the floor. Y/n watched him throw it, lip trembling as she did so.

"I don't hate how I look. I like how I look. I just, there are some parts..." She sighed.

Edward nodded, removing another piece of duct tape. He kept his eyes way from her now revealed chest, moving on to her side. Y/n groaned, holding her head in her hands. This position made it harder for Ed to remove the tape, but he didn't say anything.

"I was born a girl, I know that. And, I like being feminine. I love it, actually. But, I don't feel like I'm just a girl...I don't want to be." Her voice was weak and shaky.

"Do you feel like one certain gender?" He asked, trying to help her navigate her feelings.

"No. I just feel like...me." She answered.

"Alright. Well, what are you?"

Y/n paused, looking down at the ground. She hadn't really thought about it before. It never really crossed her mind. But, now she was really thinking about it.

"I don't really want to be labeled as anything. I want to look feminine. But, I don't want people to think I'm just a girl. I don't feel like I'm just a girl. I don't know how to explain..." She sighed.

Edward removed the last bit of the duct tape off of her skin. Y/n shivered, her bare chest exposed. But, she was too numb to even care. Edward made sure he averted his eyes the entire time. He used some of the aloe vera and rubbed it into her red and irritated skin. Y/n hissed at the cold touch.

"I think, you explained it perfectly. As long as that is exactly what you feel. You're feelings in this situation are the only ones that matter. I just want you to know that I support you through whatever decision you make. Full heartedly."

Once Edward finished applying the aloe vera, he got up from off the ground. He walked over to his closet, grabbing something out of it. He looked at it for a little while, thinking to himself. Humming, he walked back over to y/n and handed the object to her, looking into her eyes the entire time.

"We can get a binder for you, if you'd like. I know it doesn't really work too well, but you can use this in the meantime." He said.

Y/n took the object and smiled when she realized what it was. It was a back brace. It was small enough to cover her chest. It wasn't the perfect size, but she appreciated whatever she could get. She put it on immediately, struggling only a little bit.

"Thank you..."

Edward tossed one of his shirts to her and watched as y/n caught it. She slid it on, smiling at how baggy it was. Ed smiled as well, giving her a pair of sweatpants too. Y/n looked at him curiously, her head tilting to the side.

"If you ever want to wear my clothes because it makes you feel more comfortable, you don't have to ask or be sneaky about it. You're welcome to wear whatever you need."

~

The meaningful memory made y/n tear up. He was so understanding about what she was going through. And, when she figured out who she really was, he was extremely supportive. Edward had immediately ask y/n what their pronouns were, to which she said she/they. Y/n said she didn't mind if people referred to her as she, but they was what they truly preferred. And ever since that day, he referred to y/n as they. Coming out as non-binary to their friend was easy because of how supportive he was. And then, the two of them started to date. Y/n remembered their first time with Edward. The two of them wanted it to be special. Their first time was vanilla, not wanting to take it too far. But, every time after that got hotter and hotter and kinkier and kinkier. Eventually, the two of them knew about all of their partner's kinks and turn ons. And, y/n was surprised to learn about how kinky Edward was.

~

"Oh fuck, Edward!" Y/n moaned, their fingers gripping at his hair tightly.

Their naked bodies were entwined with each other on his bed. Edward was normally a shy and reserved guy, but in the bedroom he was an entirely different person. He pulled away from biting on y/n's neck, licking a stripe from her neck to her chin. Y/n whined, bucking her hips upwards. Chuckling, Edward gripped their hips and slammed them against the bed. His dick was inside them, staying perfectly still.

"I know how desperately you want me to fuck you, but I expect you to have some control over your desires. If you can't be patient for it, then do you truly deserve it, chéri?" He teased.

Y/n moaned, they loved it when Edward would speak French. It was a language he taught himself in the orphanage, along with Italian and Latin. He sounded so suave when he talked in those languages.

"I'm so-orry..." Y/n pouted, trying their best to keep still.

Edward leaned his head back, letting out a sigh as he felt her tighten around him. His eyes squinted as he made a 'tsk' sound. Looking back down on her, Edward held onto their waist gently.

"Trop peu, trop tard..." He said softly.

Y/n tilted her head to the side, unsure of what he said. Edward smirked, a playful and mischievous glint in his eyes. He leaned forward, pressing his lips against their ear. His grip on her hips tightened, nails digging into their flesh.

"Too little, too late..."

~

Y/n shivered, feeling her stomach turn into a knot as she recalled the interaction. Swallowing a lump in her throat, she pushed the feeling away. It all ended when Edward started to talk about how he wanted to fix Gotham. His desire for a renewal eventually turned into an obsession, and y/n saw how dangerous it was getting. Even though it hurt her, she didn't want to be with him while he went down that path. It had been a year since they split up.

"I suppose, it is time I end this livestream my loyal followers." Edward said.

Y/n shook herself out of her thoughts, remembering that she was watching Ed's livestream. Looking at the time, she was shocked to see that she had spaced out for about 30 minutes, recalling her fond memories with Edward. She sighed, going to exit the stream when she realized she was the only one left in it. However, Edward's voice made her stop.

"Do you still live there, Sketcher?" He asked, voice monotone, almost a hint of sadness in it.

Y/n felt her breath hitch in her throat. Shakily, her hands typed an answer. For some reason, she felt scared of Edward in this moment. She never felt scared of him. His voice was ominous.

"I am not answering that, you should already know the answer."

Edward remained silent for a little while, staring at the camera. Y/n grew unsettled, unsure of what to do. He leaned towards the camera, cupping his hands over his mouth. Y/n prepared for him to whisper, holding the phone closer to their ear.

"FINALLY THEY SPEAK!" He yelled.

Y/n dropped their phone, wincing at their ear ringing. Edward chuckled from behind the camera, finding his yelling to be funny. Y/n grimaced, scoffing as she rolled her eyes.

"I miss you. Do you miss me? If you want me to come over, say nothing. If you don't, then say anything!" He giggled.

Y/n began to type, not understanding what he was trying to do. It was like he was purposefully trying to scare them. Like it was a game to him. And y/n didn't feel like playing it. But, before she could text anything, he ended the live.

"Dick." Y/n scoffed.

She glanced at the time on her phone, wanting to see how much time had passed by.

'2:50'

Y/n groaned, getting up from the couch, taking their phone with her. The whole conversation with Edward threw her off. Unsure of what she should do, y/n decided to draw. It helped calm their nerves when they got stressed out. They walked over to their desk that was in the corner of the room, right next to the T.V. Sighing, she pulled out her iPad, which they kept on the desk, and got their drawing software set up. They pulled up Spotify on their T.V and clicked the playlist they listened to when they drew. A song she didn't really care for played, so she used this time to go change into some better clothes to draw in. They discarded their current sweatshirt and sweatpants, left in their soft purple binder and matching underwear. They thought for a moment, not really sure of what to wear. As they thought about what to wear, they pulled their hair up into a ponytail, stretching out their back afterwards.

"Fuck it." She said.

Y/n pulled their sweatpants back on, not bothering to put a shirt on since the binder was fit like a tank top of some sorts. They slid their slippers back on, laughing at the fake cigarettes they added. Y/n walked back into the living room, going back to their drawing desk. They sat down and got right to work with their drawing.

Time had gone by fast as y/n was drawing, her entire mind being focused on her work. Y/n groaned, standing up from her chair to stretch out. Glancing at her phone, her eyes widened when she saw it was 9:52 at night. But, she hadn't finished her drawing yet, and she really wanted to. Sighing, they decided another hour or so couldn't hurt. She looked at Spotify, grinning from ear to ear as one of her favorite songs played. Walking to the kitchen, she grabbed a glass of water as she swayed her hips to the beat. Taking a sip, she brought it over to her desk, placing it far away from her iPad. What y/n didn't know though, is that someone was watching her from within the shadows of her apartment. Edward Nashton had slipped into her apartment when she went to the bathroom around 10 minutes ago, and was hiding and observing her. He watched as y/n danced to the music, mouthing the lyrics as well. Y/n's music taste, at least when they drew, was mainly hyperpop music with a few other genres thrown in. Edward had never heard of the genre until y/n introduced it to him. He liked some of the songs, but he preferred to watch y/n dance to them.

"God, my neighbors probably hate me..." They chuckled to themselves.

Edward remained silent, watching as y/n danced and made commentary. That was one of Edward's favorite things about them. He loved that when they thought they were alone, or even if things were quiet, they would start talking to themselves. It could be normal things or stupid things. In this case, y/n was quoting lyrics, adding commentary on them, and complaining about their drawing. It was very evident that they were partially sleep deprived.

"Fucking, ugh! Why is it so hard to draw dilfs?" They groaned.

Edward, staying quiet, found their comments to be hilarious. However, he didn't want to reveal his position just yet. So, he watched quietly.

"Grab your man he's trying to roleplay on me all snuggly..." They mumbled in a high-pitched voice, laughing like a dork at the end.

"This songs fucking weird, it's so me core. Me core. Fuck! Me! GOD!" They face planted on the desk, groaning afterwards.

"I'm not looking up crotch references...not again...I can't subject myself to that." They whined, muffled by the desk.

Y/n lifted their head up when their phone rang, causing Edward to fall back in the shadows further. Pausing the music as the next song played, they looked at the contact on their phone. Smiling, they answered it.

"Bitch, it's 10 at night and you interrupted one of my favorite songs. You better have a good reason." They laughed.

Y/n put the phone on speaker, placing it on the kitchen counter as she poured a bowl of cereal.

"You got something better to do than talk to me, huh?" Her friend asked.

"Girl, I was drawing dilfs..."

"Oh shit, that's awesome. Can I see?"

"I haven't finished...I'm stuck."

"On what?"

"Drawing the...crotch. I don't exactly have a dick to use as reference. Not that I'm drawing a dick, he's wearing pants, but like...bulge reference. Fuck, you know what I mean."

Edward smirked to himself, a thought crossing his mind. He dismissed it as soon as it appeared. He found their conversation to be entertaining.

"I've got a big dick right here for you to use as a reference." Their friend said in a deep voice.

Y/n nearly choked on their cereal.

"Shut up! What did you call me for you cretin?"

"Oh, well I just wanted to let you know that uh...that guy at my work gave me his number..."

Y/n swallowed the cereal in her mouth, squealing afterwards. Edward covered his ears quietly, not hearing them make that noise in a long time. He had forgotten how high-pitched they could get.

"No fucking way!!! Did he say anything?" Y/n asked, looking at their hair in the reflection of the fridge.

"Yes! Ok, let me know what you think of this...he texted me earlier. This is what he said...'Hey, can't wait to talk to you more. I'd love to meet you for lunch sometime this weekend. I hope I'm not being too forward. Hope you're having a great night, Caleb.'"

Y/n gasped.

"Oh my God, he's polite too!? You hit the jackpot! You two should fall in love, have really rough kinky sex, get married, have babies, all that jazz!" Y/n spat out.

"I was thinking the same thing!!! Well, maybe not the kinky part. I'm not a freak like you." Their friend giggled.

"I'm unique like that." Y/n chuckled.

"More like you're slutty like that..."

"Hell, I'll take that as a compliment. I consider myself a collector of kinks. Like pokemon, except sinful. And you know...no animals...what were we talking about?" They asked.

"Are you high or something?" Their friend laughed.

"No, just very, very, very sleep deprived and hyped up on a large bag of sourpatch kids I got from the store. So, kind of?" They laughed.

Edward rolled his eyes, trying his best not to laugh. He missed y/n. He missed them a lot. But now, he was seeing them again. Right in front of him.

"Oh my god, go to bed! You need the sleep." Their friend suggested.

"Who are you? My mom? My dad? My overlord?" They asked.

"No, I-I'm, heh, I'm your dad-daddy..." Their friend tried to say, laughing in between her words.

"Oh fuck off, now I'm definitely getting ready for bed. Every time we call you call yourself daddy and I am 100% certain that it's giving me brain damage."

"That's the goal. To get you brain dead so I can put you in a hospital for the rest of your life!"

"Aw, how sweet! I'll haunt you when I die and possess your vibrator so it never turns on."

"Ew! Grosssss!"

"Alright, I have some cereal I have to finish absolutely devouring. So, I'll call you tomorrow. Let me know how the lunch goes!"

"Ok, love you!"

"Love you too!"

Y/n hung up the phone, as if that was the most normal conversation they had ever had. Edward found the entire thing extremely amusing. Their friend was right though, y/n was extremely kinky. Edward would know. When the two of them were in bed together, things got hot and heavy quickly. He broke out of those thoughts, watching as y/n put away their iPad and pressed play on Spotify. Yawning, they went back to the kitchen, grabbing their cereal bowl. As the song played, they finished eating their cereal quickly. Once they finished eating, they started dancing and mouthing the lyrics of the song. Edward knew this song, from when y/n would practically force him to watch tiktok edits of various people from various shows, movies, and games. He knew y/n loved this song.

"Ride!" Y/n mouthed softly, spinning around in a circle.

Y/n swayed to the song, dancing like no one was watching. Even though, someone most definitely was watching. Edward kept a keen eye on y/n, watching every movement they made.

"Can I ride!?" Y/n giggled, pointing to a drawing of a blonde man they made.

Edward recognized the person, from the Resident Evil games. Y/n was obsessed with Leon S. Kennedy for a long time, so that's probably who it was. This caused him to smile to himself.

The song was coming to an end, although still playing. Edward took this as an opportunity to step out of the shadows slowly. Every footstep he made was quiet as he made sure not to step on any creaky floorboards. As the song died down, y/n turned around after hearing a quiet noise. They turned the volume down until the music was at the same volume as a person talking normally, placing the remote back down.

"Who's there?" They asked, grabbing a pocket knife they kept on the desk.

Edward stepped completely out of the darkness, the soft light from the T.V illuminating his body in a bright white outline. Y/n scoffed, tossing their knife back on the desk. Edward found it intriguing that y/n was not scared, not even in the slightest.

"Edward Nashton, what the fuck is your problem?! I have a fucking door for you to knock on you asshole! You scared the shit out of me! I thought you were someone breaking in!" They groaned.

"I am someone breaking in." He stated simply.

"No, Edward. You're Edward. Not a scary criminal. Well, not yet at least, who knows at the rate you're going..." They mumbled.

Edward stood there, watching them walk into the kitchen. Y/n rolled their eyes, getting a glass of water. They were slightly annoyed with Edward.

"How long have you been here? Actually, no, let me guess. When I went to the bathroom. Is that when you got in?" They asked.

Edward nodded slowly.

"You're so predictable, Edward. Are you trying to scare me or something? Why are you here standing in the shadows like a creep?" They spat.

Edward walked towards them slowly, planting his gloved hands firmly on the counter. Y/n raised an eyebrow.

"I'm here to show you what I'm trying to do for Gotham! You don't understand my cause!" He exclaimed behind his mask.

"Uh huh...yeah. Why are you wearing your mask? I know who you are." They said blandly.

He didn't answer.

"Look, Ed, I know you want to help Gotham. I admire that. You've always been a kind soul. But, this is not the way to go about it. Planning murders? Bombings? How will that help?" They asked.

Edward looked down, his confidence disappearing as the person he loved told him these things. Y/n noticed, sighing before taking a sip of water. They offered Ed some, to which he denied because of the mask that was on his head. Y/n groaned.

"Take that thing off. You're Edward. Not the Riddler."

Edward's eyes narrowed, knuckles turning white as he gripped the edge of the counter. He marched into the kitchen, standing in front of y/n, pinning them against the cupboards. Y/n felt their heart race.

"I AM the Riddler! Edward, Riddler, I am two in one!" He declared, voice muffled by the mask but still projecting well.

Y/n sighed, looking over Edward. He could sense the sadness in their eyes. They reached a hand up, grabbing his glasses before removing his mask. Once the mask was off, they put the glasses back on him. Edward felt sheepish all of a sudden, almost as if removing the mask removed his entire persona.

"You look different since I last saw you, Ed. You look good." They smiled, hand cupping his face.

"Don't." He said.

"You still love me, don't you?" They asked, thumb rubbing his cheek.

Edward looked down slightly, lifting his eyes back up to theirs quickly. He took a deep breath, chest puffing out. Y/n watched as his eye twitched, a telltale sign that he was anxious.

"Yes..."

"Did you think that this whole Riddler persona would make me fall in love with you?"

Edward didn't answer.

"Ed, I still love you. I always will. But, I don't love who you're becoming. It worries me."

"I just want to do good for the people of Gotham who suffered, just like we did..." He said shakily.

"Killing people is not the way to do it. That is not going to win me over, Edward. If you want to keep this Riddler persona, then that's fine. But, use it for good. Help law enforcement with finding criminals, the ones who make Gotham a terrible place. Don't add to it..."

Edward nodded, feeling a tear roll down his cheek. Y/n wiped it away, smiling up at him. He looked down at them, straightening his posture. He cleared his throat.

"Y-You're right. It's just, this whole persona gave me a newfound confidence. I wanted to do something memorable and meaningful with it."

"Edward, I love that you've found your confidence. But, you need to use it for good."

He nodded once again, the two of them falling silent. Edward looked into y/n's eyes, feeling his cheeks grow hot. Y/n felt a knot form in their stomach.

"Can you promise me that you'll stop this madness? Please? For me, Riddles..." Y/n frowned, tears forming in their eyes.

Edward's eyes widened, hugging y/n to his chest without thinking about it. He rubbed their back, heart racing fast against theirs.

"No, no no no, no please don't cry. I promise, Sketcher. I'm sorry that all of this happened. I caused us to drift apart, I don't know what I was thinking. I promise you, I'll stop." He cooed, nearly crying against their head.

"I believe you, Edward."

The two of them grew silent as they held each other. Despite the emotional moment they just had, they weren't sure what to do. It was hard to move on from such an important conversation, especially the one they just had. Y/n sighed, pulling away from him, back against the counter. Edward looked down at them, taking in their appearance.

"Y-You got your binder. It looks good." He commented.

"Thank you, it took so long to arrive. But, it was worth the wait. I have more in other colors."

Edward nodded.

"Ed, can I tell you something?" They asked.

"Y-Yeah, of course."

"Your Riddler persona scared me a bit, what with everything that you were planning. But, besides those things, I found that whole persona to be quite..." Y/n trailed.

Edward waited, anxious for what they were going to say.

"...hot?"

His eyes widened, watching as y/n blushed lightly. He reached down, lifting their chin up with two of his fingers. Y/n looked up at him, bottom lip out in a natural pout.

"You did?" He asked.

Y/n nodded.

"It seemed like you were really protective over me when you were doing those livestreams."

Edward's jaw clenched when he thought about that one chat someone sent. He could easily find their address, and he definitely thought about paying a visit. But, after the conversation he just had with y/n, he knew that was off the table. Even though the person definitely deserved whatever he wanted to do to him.

"That swine threatened you. No one threatens you and gets away with it."

"Mmm, that's the part of the Riddler that I like..." Y/n hummed.

"God, I've missed you so much, y/n."

"I missed you too, Ed."

He looked down at them, feeling the confidence he had when he broke in flood back into his body. Y/n saw this from how his posture changed. His stature was looming and a glint of mischief twinkled in his eyes. Y/n felt themself shrink beneath him, feeling cornered in the kitchen by him. But, it wasn't like they were scared he would hurt or kill them, no. It was anticipation of what he was going to do next. Edward always was unpredictable. Y/n's breath hitched as Edward brushed a strand of hair out of their face.

"You've always had a knack for intimidating, even dangerous, men. Haven't you?" He teased softly, looking down at them with dull eyes.

Those eyes, they drove y/n insane. His gaze had the ability to make their knees wobble, faltering their stability. He knew of this affect, and he basked in the feeling of power this gave him. Neither of them liked to consider themselves 'in charge' of the other. But, when things got intimate, y/n absolutely loved it when Edward would run the show. He did too.

"You shiver under my touch, cara mia. Why is this? Do you fear me?" He asked gently.

Y/n nibbled on the bottom of their lip, chest heaving from the tension. Edward grinned, leaning down to plant a soft kiss below their ear. His breath fanned on their neck, causing goosebumps to prickle over y/n's skin.

"Or does my presence simply make you tremble with desire?" He whispered.

Y/n let a quiet moan slip out of their throat, causing them to blush deeply. They were embarrassed to admit how easily Edward drove them crazy. The two of them would be lying if they said they didn't miss each other, both emotionally, physically, and sexually. They nodded, wrapping their arms around his neck.

"Of course it does. I know you promised you'd stop the things you were going to do. But, you're still The Riddler. And, having you in my apartment, standing over me...my heart's racing. Earlier today your persona was ready to kill someone for me and, as weird as it is, I found it hot..." Y/n gasped, breathing heavily.

Edward smirked, grabbing the mask from off of the counter. He glanced down at it, then back up at y/n. A sickeningly lewd idea popped into his head. Y/n looked up at him, adrenaline and wonder filling their vision.

"You know what else he would do for you? To you?"

Y/n's legs instinctively closed, causing Edward to stifle a chuckle. He gave y/n a quick glance, as if to ask if it was ok to continue. They nodded frantically. He took a deep breath, eyes closed as he calmed himself. Without saying anything, Edward put his mask on, placing his glasses on top of the now covered bridge of his nose. He let out the breath he took, coming out in a raspy exhale. Y/n felt a shiver go down their spine as the T.V light illuminated Edward in an almost ethereal green. His hands fell to his sides, clenching and unclenching in a fist. Suddenly, he reached out and grabbed the back of y/n's neck, yanking them towards him.

"He would fuck you until you scream his name." He said simply.

The bluntness of his statement made y/n throb. They let out a shaky breath, gripping onto his shoulders for stability as their knees buckled. A dark chuckle emitted from his throat, letting go of y/n and stepping away from them. Y/n almost fell to the floor, catching onto the counter at the last second. Standing up straight, they watched as Edward walked over to the couch, standing in front of the T.V. He stared at y/n, nodding towards the couch subtly. Y/n didn't budge, breathing heavily in shock of the situation. Edward let out a frustrated sigh, stomping his foot on the ground.

"GET OVER HERE!" He shouted.

Y/n was quick to get to the couch, trembling as they stood in front of him. Edward removed the piece of the mask over his mouth, only attached with a few of those small click-on buttons. Placing it in his pocket, he grabbed y/n's face, slamming his lips onto theirs. Y/n moaned into the kiss, being caught off guard by the suddenness of it. Edward groaned, pulling away from the kiss.

"Edward..." Y/n sighed.

Grimacing, he pushed y/n down on the couch. Y/n looked up at him, eyes dark as he looked down on their body. He let out a frustrated sigh that slowly grew into a groan. He pointed at his chest repeatedly.

"I am The RIDDLER in this moment. You WILL address me as such." He declared.

Y/n squeezed their thighs together, gasping at his harsh attitude. The Riddler smirked, his mouth on display to y/n. A song started to play in the background, causing y/n to blush when they realized what it was. He walked towards them, grabbing their hips and moving them onto his lap as he sat down.

"Do you understand?" He asked.

"Y-Yes, Riddler."

He listened to the song as it played, smirking at the lyrics. Y/n avoided eye contact. Roughly, he grabbed their chin and yanked it towards him. He pulled them down to his face, kissing them on the lips briefly.

"If memory serves me right, the last time you and Edward fucked, it was to this song wasn't it? That's quite fitting, seeing as how it'll be the first song the Riddler fucks you to." He said, laughing at the end.

Y/n moaned, mouth agape slightly. He gripped it, keeping their mouth open. Looking at their mouth, he remained silent. His analytical eyes observed the inside of y/n's mouth. They were slightly confused, but afraid to move.

"You'd take me well with that mouth of yours..." He stated.

Y/n moaned softly, whining at the end. He chuckled, releasing his grip on their jaw. He looked at y/n, pushing them off of his lap. Y/n stood up in front of him, panting and wide eyed.

"Strip." He ordered.

Y/n didn't hesitate, removing their pants. He watched as they slid their underwear off, causing him to let out a low grunt at the sight of their bare lower body. Reaching up, y/n hesitantly started to remove their binder. The Riddler held up a hand, signaling for them to stop.

"No. If you feel that that part of your body does not belong on you, then I do not find it desirable. I will not allow you to face dysmorphia once again." He said.

Y/n smiled, feeling their heart swell. It pleased y/n to know that Edward's Riddler persona was just as caring and supportive as he was. Giggling, they left their binder on. He stood up, unbuttoning his pants slightly, letting his bulge under his underwear poke out. Grabbing y/n's neck, he kissed them harshly and bit their bottom lip. They groaned as he pulled away. Edward hushed them, placing a finger against their lips as he listened to the song.

'Kiss me on the lips, choke me on the floor.'

'Drag me around, push me right against your door.'

'I'm your little doll, come and play with me.'

'Fucking chase me, fucking break me.'

Y/n hummed to the song very quietly and he grinned. Adjusting his grip on y/n's neck, he smirked down at them. The glasses he wore were reflecting the light of the T.V. He looked mysterious and dangerous. It made y/n's cheeks heat up.

"You like that song, huh?" He asked, rubbing his thumb against their skin.

They nodded.

"Of course you do. You like that shit, don't you?" He mocked.

They nodded again, frantically. He mimicked the way they nodded, even going so far as to imitate the soft moans they made. Y/n held the hand he had gripped around his throat, pouting up at him. He rolled his eyes. He knelt down on the floor, bringing them down with him. Y/n's eyes grew big as he pinned them against the floor, straddling their lap as he did so. The grip on their throat tightened, y/n gasping for air. The Riddler hummed to himself, swaying his head to the song. Pretending he spaced out, he looked back down to y/n. He faked a gasp, covering his mouth with his free hand. Y/n let out a choked moan, causing The Riddler's bulge to grow.

"You said you liked to be choked on the floor, isn't that true? I'm just giving you what you want." He cooed, reaching down to caress their face.

He watched y/n as they grabbed at his hand. The Riddler let out a yawn, releasing his grip on their throat. Y/n moaned, gasping for breath. He mocked their panicked breathing, holding his own throat with his hands. He faked chokes before breaking out into a soft and eerie laughter. Y/n felt filthy for finding his actions extremely hot.

"I thought you liked that? Hm?" He teased.

"I do..." They sighed, a moan slipping out at the end.

He reached down, grabbing the ponytail their hair was in. As he stood up, he pulled at their hair, causing y/n to stand up with him. He dragged them across the room by their hair, making sure not to go too fast. He wanted to be rough, not abusive. Walking inside y/n's room, he closed the door behind them before slamming y/n against it. They grunted, wrapping their arms around his neck.

"You wanted this. Your eyes were practically begging me to fuck you. Please tell me you didn't expect the Riddler to go easy on you, mon cœur?" He chuckled, a sick smirk tugging at his lips.

"No, I want it rough. I love it rough..." They panted.

He threw them on the bed, watching as they propped themselves on their elbows. Their legs were crossed over each other, hiding themself from him. He rolled his head to the side, letting his neck crack as he walked to the bed. He stood in front of y/n, menacing and ominous.

"Yes, I know. I know how filthy you are. I know how...experimental...you were when you were mine. I imagine you're still the same filthy slut."

Y/n nodded repeatedly, slowly opening their legs. His head was held high, exuding power with his stance. He let his eyes trail down, face emotionless as he gazed between y/n's legs. He breathed in deep, letting out a shaky sigh that made y/n moan. The Riddler found himself mesmerized by the sight before him, his muse, his love, all spread out and on display for him. It was a beautiful sight that made the blood pump in his veins. He felt his dick twitch and inhaled deeply before exhaling.

"Offering yourself to me, so...willingly...it brings a smile to my face. I assume you realize how whorish you look right now. Spreading your legs for a dangerous person such as me..." He trailed, leaning down and planting his fists on either side of the bed.

His body was hovering over the lower half of y/n. Underneath his chest was y/n's legs, spread open, exposing their body to him. Y/n moaned, nodding their head.

"I know how slutty I'm acting. But, I can't help it. You make my heart race and I just want to feel you inside me so bad..." They whined, squirming underneath him.

"Yeah, you want that?" He hummed.

"Fuck, yes!"

He made a 'tsk' noise as he stood up straight. Y/n watched as he removed the gloves he wore. He placed the pair in his left hand, glancing down at them. He looked back down at y/n, humming again. Throwing one of the gloves to the side, he reached down and dragged the one he kept over y/n's stomach. Slowly, he trailed back down, kneeling on the floor in front of the bed. He grabbed the underside of y/n's calves, yanking them towards him. Their legs dangled off the bed, lifting up as he hung them over his shoulders.

"As you'll recall, I have a strong fascination with games, puzzles, riddles, etc. How about we play a game right now? Will you amuse me and take part, cara mia?" He asked, letting his breath fan against y/n's slick core.

"Mmm, yes. I-I'll play a game with you, Riddler." They moaned.

"Oh how fun, I have high hopes for you."

He blew against their pussy once again, smirking cockily to himself as y/n squirmed. His hands gripped their thighs that hung over his shoulders.

"I'll ask you riddles and you answer them. If you get it right, you get a reward. If not, well...you'll find out, how about that?" He chuckled, waving his glove for them to see before sliding it on his left hand.

"What? I've never been good at your Riddles! That's not fa-"

"Those are Edward's riddles. You have not heard mine, have you? Besides, I just made them up a few moments ago, specifically for you. It would make me so upset if you chose not to play."

"Ok, fine. Just, ask me your riddles."

He chuckled.

"I can make you shiver and I can make you hot. I may take a while to arrive, but I can be fast in the right hands. What am I?"

Y/n groaned, holding their hands over their face. The Riddler giggled, finding their struggle amusing. While he waited, he looked between their legs. He licked his lips as he saw how swollen their clit was.

"What am I, y/n?" He asked.

"Damn it, I don't know! Mail?" They whined.

"Mail? Hm, not even close. Do you want a hint, cara mia? I'll let you have another try." He smirked.

"Yes, please..." Y/n groaned.

"If you're good I'll give it to you tonight..." He hinted suggestively.

Y/n furrowed their eyebrows, thinking for a moment. The hint was so obscure. It could be anything based on how he said it. After a bit, their eyes widened in realization.

"An orgasm!"

Chuckling darkly, he shoved a finger deep inside of y/n. Y/n threw their head back into the bed, a lewd moan leaving their mouth. The Riddler let out a sigh, enjoying the feeling of his finger inside of them.

"Oh, good job darling. I'm so proud of you. Are you ready for another riddle? You only get one try this time..."

"F-Fuck, u-um, yeah I'm ready..."

"A queen, a movie, I can chill you to the bone. If it comes from pleasure, some would call it a moan. What am I?"

"What the fuck...? Um, fuck, I don't know...I don't know!" They whined.

Sighing, he kept stood up, not all the way though. He wanted his finger to remain inside y/n. Caressing y/n's face with his gloved hand, he watched as they pressed into his touch. The smile on his face faded, turning into a frown. Swiftly, he brought the back of his hand across their face. Y/n gasped, mouth agape and looking up at him.

"SCREAM! I'M A SCREAM!"

Y/n whined, bucking their hips up into Edward's finger. He furrowed his eyebrows underneath his mask. He went back down between their legs and smacked their thigh lightly, signaling for them to stop. He sighed.

"You should have known that answer, it's one of your favorite horror movies. I'm disappointed. You only get one more riddle. If you get it right, I'll finally give you what you so desperately want. If you get it wrong, I leave you on your bed a wet, slutty, pathetic mess."

"Oh God..." Y/n mumbled.

"I am done when desperate. A dog for a treat, a criminal for their life, a traitor for forgiveness. What am I?"

Y/n thought, not wanting to get it wrong. They groaned, eyes shut closed tightly. A frustrated sigh left their lips, turning into a whine like a child pouting. The Riddler smirked.

"Riddler, I beg you please...just fuck me!" They pleaded.

"Oh, you're so close to earning that..." He chuckled.

Y/n went silent, eyes widening.

"Beg! It's beg!" They cried out.

He pulled his finger out, causing y/n to whine. Leaning down, he planted a kiss on their lips. A proud smile was on his face, a laugh coming from his throat.

"Very good, ange précieux. I'm so proud of you." He praised, standing up straight.

Y/n watched as he looked down on them, eyes crazed and bright behind his glasses. He stepped forward, the bulge hidden by his underwear directly in front of y/n's face as they sat up. Y/n waited for him to say something, but he never did. Instead, he slowly pushed his underwear down, letting his dick fall out. He groaned as it slapped their face. Y/n kissed it gently, letting their tongue lap around the tip. He hissed, not giving any warning as he grabbed their hair and shoved his dick down their throat. Y/n gagged on the length, tears forming in their eyes. The Riddler moaned, leaning his head back in pleasure as he held their head there. After a moment, he pulled them off, pushing them down to the bed.

"I was correct, my dick fits perfectly in your pretty little mouth. But that is not what I want right now, nor is it what you want. Admittedly, it would be nice to throat fuck you till you're gasping for air...but I digress. Now, spread your legs."

Y/n moaned, their back flat against the bed as they listened to his instructions. The Riddler removed his glove, swaying his hand in the air as classical music played on the T.V. He hummed to himself, knowing the lyrics by heart, going through a huge classical music phase a few years back. Y/n watched, finding it hypnotic and twisted how carefree he was about the situation. Meanwhile, y/n was desperate and horny, spread out on the bed.

"A beautiful piece..." He mumbled.

He stepped forward a little, grabbing the underside of y/n's thighs as he pulled them close. Abruptly, he spit in between their legs, the substance landing on their throbbing pussy. He quietly sang the lyrics, y/n not knowing what he was saying. It always baffled y/n how well he spoke Latin, French, who the hell knew what other languages he spoke. All y/n knew was that it turned them on. Tightening his grip on their thighs, he pulled them closer to him as he thrusted forwards. Y/n cried out, voice cracking as they moaned. The Riddler grunted, but continued to sing along with the song. Y/n whined as he stilled inside of them, causing him to groan.

"It's rude to interrupt someone. I like this song, now be quiet!" He spat, bringing a hand down to pinch their clit.

Y/n bit back a moan, biting down on their fist. He was torturing them, y/n was sure of it. And, they were correct. The Riddler knew how desperately they wanted to be fucked by him, but he was having too much fun to give it to them. Not without a few more teases. He moved very slightly, causing y/n to think he was about to thrust into them. When they realized he was playing with them, they let out a pitiful whine. Their back arched, covering their face with their hands as the pathetic noise left their lips. He watched this, the sight making him twitch inside of them.

"Oh, cara mia..." He cooed.

"Riddler, please..." They cried.

"Mmm, my name sounds so good coming out of your mouth. My dear pitoyable chérie. Do you want me to fuck you?"

"Yes! Please!"

"Tell me how filthy you are for wanting this. Tell me that you're mine. You know it's true." He groaned, pinching the inside of their thigh.

"Fuck, you're right! I'm yours, Riddler. I always have been! I'm your filthy sl-slut. Please! I jus-"

He reached down, grabbing their hair. Leaning down, he met them halfway as he kissed them roughly. With a harsh thrust he began to fuck into them at a brutal pace. Moaning into the kiss, y/n bit down on his lip. He groaned and pushed them back down, standing up straight again. Bending over, he crawled on top of them as he continued to plow into their sopping pussy. Y/n reached up and gripped his hair, incoherent mumbling sliding past their lips.

"Oh, you filthy thing...you want more? Tell me."

"Yes! Please!"

A guttural growl left his throat, cursing underneath his breath. He grabbed y/n, looking around the room. Spotting a mirror, he dragged y/n in front of it. Sitting on the bed behind them, he shoved y/n down on his dick, sitting on his lap. The Riddler fucked up inside of them, facing the mirror all the while.

"My, my, would you look at that?" He teased grabbing y/n's jaw and forcing them to look at the mirror.

Y/n whimpered, watching them bouncing on his dick as he thrust upwards. The pace was sickeningly animalistic, a speed that y/n didn't think was humanly possible. A dark chuckle resonated in his chest, y/n feeling it vibrate against their back.

"Look how good you're taking me. You were made for me, cara mia. My missing puzzle piece. You fit me so perfectly. So tightly." He moaned in their ear, voice raspy and low.

"Oh fuck, Riddler..."

"That's right, cara mia. Moan my name. I won't let you cum until I've heard you scream it."

His nails dug sharply into the excess flesh of their hips, leaving indents in the skin. The classical music playing in the back made the erotic scene even more vulgar. Ecstasy was thick in the air like pungent poison. It filled their sense and drove them crazy, searching for the antidote in each other's bodies and pleasure. The Riddler ripped the hair tie out of y/n's hair, letting it fall down. He buried his face in it, inhaling their sweet scent that he missed so much. Though he was the Riddler, his feelings for y/n were the exact same as Edward's. After all, they were the same person. Just a persona, a facade he put on. Like roleplay.

"Ri-Riddler...please." They begged.

Grunting, he stood up, holding y/n by their thighs. His dick stayed inside them the whole time as he flipped them over onto their back on the bed. Not giving them any time to adjust, he picked their legs up and held them high. With the better angle, he drilled into them, face contorting into pleasure underneath the mask. Y/n covered their eyes with one of their hands, arching their back. With the other hand, they gripped the sheets desperately searching for some stability. With every thrust he made, the Riddler pummeled directly into y/n's g-spot, making them moan each time. With every moan that left their lips, the next one became more pornographic.

"Oh, I can tell you are so close. You've reached the precipice of your desire, teetering on the edge, aren't you?" He moaned, gasping at the end.

"Y-Yes, please! I wanna cum!"

"You want me to push you over that edge, cara mia?" He taunted, slowing his pace.

"Fuck! Don't stop! Please! I n-need it so bad!" Y/n was crying, their sobs pitiful and sad to listen to.

"Then scream my name!" He growled.

He slapped them across the face, slamming into them roughly. Y/n let out a noise that was indescribable. However, the sound made him whimper. His thrusts quickened, no longer rough but rather sadistic. Y/n tried to get words out, but couldn't. He pinched their clit harshly, twisting it between his pointer finger and thumb.

"RIDDLER! FUCK!" They screamed, the multiple sensations overwhelming them.

"That's it. That's what I wanted to hear..." He sighed.

All it took was a few more thrusts, that's all. With those final powerful, sadistic thrusts, y/n came undone. He pulled out quickly, cupping his mouth over their sopping hole. The suction of his lips against their pussy guided them through their orgasm. The Riddler groaned against their sensitive skin, lapping up all their arousal and climax. With a satisfied moan, he unlatched his lips and swiped his tongue around them. Some of their orgasm dripped onto the mask, but he cared very little about that. Standing over them, he stroked his length, head tilted back as he did so. Eyes were closed shut as he felt himself nearing his climax. His breathing quickened in pace, chest heaving up and down as he let out soft groans. Y/n could tell he was about to cum. Immediately, y/n crawled towards him, albeit shakily, and lowered their mouth on his cock. A loud moan slipped out of the Riddler, looking down to see y/n sucking harshly on his dick. The sight pushed him over and he felt his dick pulse inside their mouth as he released inside of it. He gripped onto their hair harshly, tugging on it as he hunched over. Y/n popped off of his dick after swallowing the thick liquid. They hated the taste of it, but they so desperately wanted to please him. A string of cum and saliva connected their lips to the tip of his dick. Using his thumb, he wiped it off their bottom lip. Y/n fell back onto the bed, grabbing a pillow and hugging it tight to their chest. The both of them were panting, catching their breath that was lost in the sinful exchange they committed.

Edward stood still, tucking himself back into his underwear. He groaned, rolling his head around to work out a kink in his neck. Removing his mask, he placed it on dresser near the bed. Y/n watched him as he did this, giving him time to calm down. He removed his jacket, revealing a dark green tank top underneath. His pants were next to go, tossing it somewhere in the room. Mumbling to himself, he got in bed next to y/n, pulling them close to his chest.

"God, I missed that..." He sighed.

"Me too...does this mean we're back together?" They asked.

"I'd like to think so. What about you?"

"Yeah, I'd like that."

Edward rolled over on his back, staring at the ceiling for a moment. Y/n turned on their side, facing him. As he breathed y/n watched his chest rise up and down. The rhythm soothed them, almost like counting sheep. Sitting up with a grunt, Edward sat on the side of the bed. It was from this angle that y/n realized how toned Edward was. He had gained a bit of weight since they last saw him. But, that was honestly a good thing. He was very skinny before, almost unhealthy. Y/n was glad to see a little more meat on his bones.

"Whatcha doin'?" They asked.

"Honestly, trying not to pass out. But, I was going to get a washcloth to clean you up." He yawned, rubbing his eyes.

"Oooh, Edward Nashton's world famous aftercare. Can I have a glass of wine and a cheese platter as well?" They asked.

"Mmm, I forgot how funny you are after you get your guts rearranged..." He said sarcastically.

He stood up from the bed, tripping over his feet slightly as he made his way to the bathroom. Y/n giggled, missing their boyfriend dearly. The both of them were undoubtedly glad to be back together, even if it was a result of Edward breaking into y/n's apartment. After a few moments, he came out of the bathroom, glasses slightly crooked and eyes barely open. Y/n was rarely tired after sex, but Edward usually did get tired. It honestly just depended on how rough he was. And, he was extremely rough tonight. Y/n gave him a kiss, holding his face in the palm of their hand. Pulling away, y/n looked to see if it woke him up at all. And, surprisingly, it did. He had a dorky smile on his face as he held the damp washcloth in his hand.

"I can make you some coffee afterwards if you'd like?" Y/n suggested.

Edward nodded as he gently placed the cloth on their thigh. Rubbing softly, he wiped away their arousal. His eyes were so bright and caring, just like the subtle smile that was on his face. With one final wipe, he placed the cloth in the hamper. Y/n started to sit up, but Edward stopped them. Carefully, he dragged them to the edge of the bed, legs dangling off the edge. Y/n sat up very slowly, stomach sore from the sex. Edward walked to the dresser, thinking for a moment before he opened one of the drawers. He pulled out a pair of underwear. Holding that in his hand, he opened another drawer and grabbed a pair of sweats. He closed all of the drawers he opened and went back to y/n.

"I'm surprised I remembered which ones to open." He chuckled.

Y/n smiled as he slide the pair of underwear up their legs. He was cautious around the inside of their upper thighs. Edward knew they would be extra sensitive, so he did his best to be as gentle as possible. Once the underwear was on, he helped them put on sweatpants as well.

"Ok, uh, where do you keep your coffee? Same place?" He asked, standing up.

Y/n nodded, resting their head against his stomach. Edward smiled widely, patting their head softly. He leaned down, placing a chaste kiss on the top of their head. Pulling away, he started to leave the room.

"Go piss." He stated simply.

(a/n: everyone should pee after they have sex, it helps flush out any bacteria and prevents UTI's :) make sure you all stay healthy!)

"Oh God, Edward. Really? You couldn't have found a more blunt way to say that?" They laughed, slowly standing up on shaky legs.

"I could if I tried. Do you need help?" He asked, hand on the door frame.

"No, I'm ok. Thanks though." They said.

Edward nodded, leaving the room to let y/n take care of themselves. Yawning, he walked past the couch, stretching out his arms. He glanced at the T.V and chuckled. Earlier, classical music was playing. And now? Well, obviously, the Pokemon: Indigo League theme song was playing. Seeing and hearing the song gave Edward the sudden urge to watch the show. He got a pot of coffee brewing, the smell raising goosebumps on his skin. Edward knew that y/n worked at a coffee shop, they have been for the past couple years. He knew that y/n could make a really good cup of coffee. A few minutes later, y/n came walking out of the bedroom, legs shaking slightly as they walked. Edward had a cocky grin on his face.

"I think I did a pretty good job tonight..." He said softly, voice slightly hoarse.

"No shit, I don't think I'll walk straight for a whole week. Work is going to suck on Monday." They groaned.

Edward looked in the cabinet where the coffee mugs were, smirking when he found his old mug. He poured some coffee in the green mug, taking a sip immediately afterwards. He sighed, feeling better even after the first sip.

"You kept my mug." He said.

"Well, it was really all I had as a reminder of you." They smiled.

"Oh, that reminds me..."

Edward placed the mug down, walking over to corner of the living room. Looking around, he scratched the back of his head. Y/n grabbed a juice box from the fridge, suddenly craving something fruity. They watched as Edward bent over and grabbed something from off the ground. He made his way back over to y/n, holding whatever he picked up behind his back. Y/n raised an eyebrow, glancing to the T.V and seeing that Heavy Metal Lover by Lady Gaga was playing. Edward snapped his fingers in front of their face.

"Hey, no Gaga! Not yet. I've got something to show you." He chuckled.

Y/n brought their attention, biting on the straw of the juice box as they took a sip. Edward brought one of his hands out from behind his back and held it in front of y/n. Removing the juice box from their lips, the set it on the counter. They gasped, holding their hands over their mouth.

"Oh my God, Edward! It's Sir Clawdius!" They squealed.

Edward smiled as they snatched the bear out of his hand. When y/n and Edward split up, y/n couldn't find the bear anywhere. They had assumed that they lost it. But, Edward had it the whole time.

"I will admit that I snuck it away when I left, I just wanted a piece of you with me. I meant to return it, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I brought it with me because I was finally going to give it back to you. So, yeah...sorry." He looked down sheepishly.

"Oh Edward, I'm not mad. I'm relieved that he was safe with you!" They giggled.

"Oh, well that's a relief. I thought you might try to maul me or something..."

"Maybe..."

"What? Please don't..."

"I'm kidding. Go drink your coffee! I'm going to put this li' guy up on my shelf!" They said.

Edward grabbed his coffee, leaning against the counter as y/n walked to the desk they drew at. He smiled as the warm drink went down his throat. Standing on their tippy-toes, they reached up and slid Sir Clawdius up on the top shelf, right next to the Leon Kennedy drawing.

"Oh yeah, I meant to ask. Is that a recent drawing? Did you play RE4 recently?" He asked, an eyebrow raised.

"Uh, maybe...don't look at the game in my console..."

"Ok, well that answers that question. But, I have another question. Have you done a speed run of it yet?" He asked.

"No, I take my time playing that game. I like the graphics..."

Edward shook his head slowly as he finished the last of his coffee. Y/n looked away, fighting back a goofy smile.

"Oh yeah, the graphics...totally. By graphics do you mean you like getting Leon hurt on purpose because he moans every single time?" He asked.

"This is becoming an interrogation and I am exercising my 4th amendment. So, I don't have to answer anything."

"Ok. Well, you basically confirmed my theory. Plus, I've seen you play the game in the middle of the night when I lived with you."

"You did!?"

"A lot. Every single time you were either angling the camera to get a better look at him or running into fights on purpose. So..."

"Ooh! I'm going to ignore the fact that you said that and pretend like we never had this conversation! That sounds like a really good idea!" They said cheerily, sitting down on the couch.

Edward rolled his eyes, sitting down next to them. He exhaled softly and watched as y/n turned off Spotify and turned it onto the console. Lo and behold, the most recent game played was RE4. Y/n handed the controlled to Edward, gesturing for him to take it.

"I wanna watch you play. Every time you get hurt is another picture of Leon Kennedy I will draw."

"Oh wow, you are very sleep deprived aren't you?" He laughed.

Edward took the controller and started to play the game. While he played, y/n slid under his arm, resting their head against his chest. They watched him play until they eventually drifted off into sleep. Edward smiled and turned the game off, holding y/n close to him as he picked them up. Going in their bedroom, he placed them under the covers and crawled in next to them. He let them fall asleep snuggled up into his side as he rubbed their back. He had been through a lot of problems while they were separated. And it was true that he went down a very dark path. But, he was so thankful for y/n, glad that they snapped him out of it. For now, he was happy, holding the love of his life in his arms once again. That was truly all he needed in his life. The warm and comforting embrace of his best friend was the one thing that could cure him of any ailment, any troubling thoughts, and could bring him out of the darkness that clouded his mind like a thick fog. He was as happy as he could ever be in this one moment.

He would never leave them again.

~

#writers #fanfic writer #writers of tumblr #fanfic #gotham #the riddler #dc universe #edward nashton #paul dano riddler #the batman 2022 #the batman riddler #paul dano #danonation #batman 2022 #dano riddler

[strangesickness]

so i just rewatched IT chapter 2 for the first time in five years and. i have some Thoughts

there are A LOT more flashing lights in this movie than i remembered and i apparently do not deal with those as well as i did half a decade ago (as i'm writing this i have a headache and i kept having to shut my eyes during scenes because it hurt my eyes so bad)

the "let's take our shirts off and kiss!" line does not have any context??? i didn't forget that line but i was under the impression it must have had SOME sort of context. but nope? eddie will try so hard to pretend to be heterosexual and then he will see richie for an hour and start telling him to kiss him. like okay buddy

this shits so fucking cheesy. i know in my heart stan was being a bit of a sarcastic asshole when he wrote "be you be proud" there's no way he wrote that without the intention of taking the piss out of richie. like COME ON that is WAY TOO ON THE NOSE

EVIL that they keep showing richie mourning eddie and then immediately switching to a scene of bev and ben kissing. we get it gay people die alone and the hot straight people get to own a yacht or something (mostly kidding i love bev and ben but i do feel kind of weird about the gay stuff in this movie idk...)

the fact that eddie has canonically seen enough of richie's stand up routine to have an opinion on it (that he doesn't write it himself) is very important to me. bro probably like hatewatches his actual comedy shows but loves his interviews i believe this

we were ROBBED of the miniseries mike and bill biking around on silver montage and they replaced it with fucking. BILLVERLY. be for real.

everyone else getting their tokens: almost dies. richie getting his token: the clown said he knows i'm gay :(

richie being like "jeez we're not afraid of spiders" and then eddie immediately taking off his shower cap is SILLY <3

almost cried when eddie was like "i wonder what stan would be like all grown up" and richie was like "probably how he was as a kid. the best." LIKE BE REAL YOU ARE MAKING ME CRY

bev and ben trying to have a moment and richie and eddie yelling "I FUCKED YOUR MOM!" "NO YOU DIDNT!" "I FUCKED YOUR MOM" back and forth in the background is payback for all of their romantic scenes after eddie's death while i'm sitting here crying

mike drugging bill is very funny. i love their dynamic BILL: did you drug me???? MIKE: a little... maybe... BILL: it's okay <3

that reminds me. WHEN THEY SAID I LOVE YOU TO EACH OTHER???? <33333 also mike's MAN at the end is so real he gets me.

really sunk in while watching this movie that i, an adult, dress like thirteen year old richie tozier. that's evil.

#it chapter 2 #it stephen king #it 2019 #it 2017 #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #reddie #mike hanlon #bill denbrough #beverly marsh

[reddiepilled]

how the teenage losers club would like their coffee (hc's)

bill

bill LOVES espresso. bill has espresso nearly every morning that he can and he sits on his porch and reads/writes/draws while he drinks. just like an average americano, or latte.

stanley

i feel like this is an unpopular opinion, but i think that stan would have more than an average amount of cream and sugar in his coffee. his parents make fun of him because he puts like 4 spoons of sugar. he tries to hide the amount of shit he's putting in by standing around nonchalantly, waiting until no one is looking to add everything. if he’s not drinking coffee he’s drinking tea!!

mike

i feel like mike doesn’t like coffee, it's just not his thing. when they go to cafes he probably gets hot chocolate. i feel like hot chocolate would be a top 3 drink for mike. he doesn't like to experiment with the flavours, he sticks with the classic stuff.

ben

ben DESPISES coffee. he LOVES all teas though, especially classic black teas for the morning. he doesn't put anything in his tea (maybe honey? he's just not a sugar/milk guy).

richie

richie rarely drinks coffee but when he does it's only on weekends, and only if there is a full breakfast to go with it. there has to be joy and love in the air for him to even lay eyes on that coffee pot.

eddie

eddie usually doesn't like coffee, but he'll have it at a friends house the morning after a sleepover (probably at richies house, idk why but i feel like the toziers would have bomb ass coffee and super expensive coffee gadgets all over their kitchen - probably the funnest sleepover house OMG I'M GETTING OFF TRACK). he would do 2 cream 1 sugar, but sometimes he gets cheeky and goes for 2 sugar.

bev

bev LOVES iced coffee. she likes to make it very fancy too!! syrups, sauces, powders, creams and whatnot.... she would also dabble in espresso. i think she would also have a job as a barista at some point in her teen years.

sorry if some are too short... i had more ideas for some than others. feel free to add on/give ur opinion!

#it headcanons #losers club #it movie #it 2017 #it 1990 #bill denbrough #stanley uris #mike hanlon #ben hanscom #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #beverly marsh

[ckret2]

What’s ur favorite GF character you almost never see mention/art of?

Lately as I've been digging more into Gideon's character in order to write him, I've actually been getting genuinely fond of that kid.

There's a lot to work with! He's the season 1 main villain and the villain with the most appearances, he does real magic, he's right on the cusp of forming a full cult around his fake magic, he's been earning his family's money since age 9 at least, he bonds with Mabel because they both like beautiful sparkly things—there's a side to him that vibes HARD with Mabel that she felt too that gets buried when he romance zones her, and it's a huge loss for both of them—he had the exact same "found a Journal and got obsessed with its magical/paranormal secrets and went to extremes trying to dig to the bottom of this mystery" story as Dipper but we never SEE that story because it's all offscreen and that's a WILD plotline for a kid coded as (Raised To Act Like) A Good Little Conservative Christian Boy, he's as much Ford's indirect protégé-in-absentia as Dipper was,like, he has nearly as much to flip out about re: the Ford reveal as the actual Mystery Shack household does, he's the only other person in town who understands the gravity of that, AND HE'S ALSO Stan's nemesis, which is WILD, they BOTH look goofy for considering the other their nemesis—he's summoned and betrayed Bill Cipher TWICE and lived to tell the tale, he went to WHOLE ADULT JAIL as a TEN YEAR OLD and formed a BIKER GANG that follows him just because they adore him and he brightens up their lives... There is so much! Going on with this kid! He's SUCH a fun & fascinating character, he can be an interesting foil to ALL the Pines in different ways and he's got the second deepest relationship with the main villain out of the whole cast just in terms of how much we can assume they interacted with each other...

But for a main villain and one of the most frequent recurring characters, Gideon gets next to no fandom attention. When I search his tag, nearly every post is about the whole ensemble cast with Gideon just happening to be included too; i can scroll for pages and only see 2 or 3 posts that are actually about GIDEON.

I'm assuming it's because he's chubby and has a goofy pompadour.

#differentcowboypanda #ask #gideon gleeful #gravity falls #(I'm putting this in the tag! I want to make y'all think about his character! Do stuff with him! Justice for Gideon!)

[divorcedfiddleford]

Random but - if you were given an opportunity to rewrite Ford's character and his arc in the show (and later J3), how would it be like?

canon gay and trans

so the thing is that i think most of how ford himself is written is really really good! i just think that the writers (particularly alex) have a bias against him, and so a lot of the narrative ends up feeling like he's either being punished or being forced to atone for his past. so i'm gonna ramble and daydream for a bit but i want to be clear i actually really like how he's written in general (yes, even in the book that i have so much beef with!!)

there's very few moments of catharsis for him, and those that he gets are either short (reunion with fiddleford) or undermined by the writers' bias (the ending of journal 3 where he burns all his bill stuff but has to keep reminding us that he was stupid for trusting bill in the first place). so i think a lot of the problems i have would be resolved with tonal shifts and a few cuts, like that fucking scene in the stanchurian candidate with the mind control tie. the implication of reaganite ford is bad enough but then to have a guy who has very specific trauma relating to being mind controlled/not being in control of his own body just hand that over is really fucking stupid. then again i think that whole episode is stupid so i'd end up rewriting all of it lmao

i've said before but if i really had my way i'd cut roadside attraction entirely and replace it with another ford episode. i loved how goofy and fun dd&md was and i think if more of that lighthearted side of him was shown it would endear him to the audience more. a long time ago i had an idea for an episode where they go back to the bunker and ford basically does puppy talk to the shapeshifter who is actively trying to kill them. i never followed this idea through to its conclusion but i think it still sounds entertaining, plus it would also give more time for him to reunite with fiddleford so it wouldn't have to be squeezed in the finale.

speaking of the finale... my personal fantasy is that i'd love to have a scene stuck in there where stan apologizes to ford. it REALLY stood out to me that despite all their fighting, ford still at least says the words "i'm sorry" to stan. stan never apologizes for anything he did to ford - neither for breaking his project, nor for banishing him to the hell dimension for 30 years. i get that they were mistakes, but you still have to apologize for mistakes (and if i allow myself to get very self-indulgent for a second, i've often thought the whole story would be a lot more resonant if stan broke ford's machine on purpose). i had a whole section in here where i talked about what a scene like this would look like but it was so long... if people want to hear more about it i'll say more but it's the kind of thing that warrants its own post.

anyway. moving on from the show itself. so possibly my hottest take is that i think journal 3 should not have been published KJSHDFLGKHSDFGUIWEHRGJSDF. basically i think instead of trying to write the actual journal 3 they should have picked a handful of stories from his research era that they wanted to tell and made a graphic novel about that. i got WAAAAAAAYYYY off topic and wrote PARAGRAPHS about this but it's not related to the question you asked so i'll just summarize by saying i think it would play more to their strengths as writers, leave more to the imagination, and they could leave out all those fucking retcons that i hate

as it is, though, again, i think that ford is written pretty well in the journal. there are a few off-handed comments and lines that give me "he would not fucking say that" vibes but overall it very realistically portrays what it's like for someone to be manipulated, isolated, drawn away from his loved ones, etc. it's a very poignant story which resonated with a lot of people, myself included. again my main problem is that it's undercut with the writers being like "BROOOOO HE'S JUST LIKE ICARUS!! FLEW TOO CLOSE TO THE SUN!!!!!!!!" as though it's all his fault, and that it ends on a very moralizing "i learned my lesson" note. so really the biggest characterization problems i have with journal 3 have to do with fiddleford, but that's a whole other can of worms

anyway i hope this was... interesting? informative?? i hope i answered your question to your satisfaction. have a nice day :)

#gravity falls #tales of the wild zeep