#but like literally did not notice the exertion while it was happening bc I was in 'oh fuck we need to find this cat' mode

[anonymouslyel]

eddie who is so open with his affection and appreciation to everyone about what they do for him.

dustin offers his house for a d&d session and eddie's like "i love you, hendersen. do you know that?"

robin pays for a dvd rent one time and eddie goes "if we weren't you know, i'd marry you. thanks, buckley."

nancy gifts him some metal trinkets from some store near her college and eddie kisses her head, saying "you are a dream girl, nancy wheeler! i'd fight buckley for your hand," with a teasing nudge to robin

lucas and max randomly gives him some patches for his new vest and he hugs the teens tightly saying, "you two are the most adorable couple in all of hawkins!"

el finally caved in and made eddie float at least five inch above the ground with her mind and he praises eleven so hard saying "that is the most metal thing ever! ozzy could never!" while smiling wide and patting el's head

mike and will gifts him dice (the one eddie has been talking about every end of a campaign) and eddie dramatically wipes an imaginary tear, before kissing the head of the teens so affectionately (will smiles so wide while mike pushes him away but eddie knows mike is just shy)

steve sees that and wants to be hugged and kissed and praised like that (he's already done with realization and panicking with the help of robin and nancy). so he does everything that could elicit that kind of reaction from eddie.

he tried so hard to curate music that, aside from what eddie usually listens to, eddie would like. that took him probably three weeks with the help of, surprisingly, argyle, and, not surprisingly, jonathan.

all that got him was a "this is very thoughtful, steve. i'll ket you know what i think after i listen to it" with a sincere smile.

(steve didnt know how big eddie's smile is as he went home that night. wayne had noticed and was so curious about what (or who) put that big smile on his nephew but eddie only said a friend made him a mixtape. steve doesnt know how eddie had to bite his tongue to stop hinself from kissing steve harrington in the middle of the school's parking lot.)

steve didnt give up and buys some patches too. he wants to be hugged that tight too.

this time steve was graced with a tight hold in the arm bc apparently steve bought him a metallica patch. "you said you basically listened to them only for a week," steve said.

(eddie rewarded himself that night for only grasping steve's arm instead of hugging and twirling the other man in front of the hellfire club members by buying a pizza for him and wayne)

steve tries to go for the kiss on the temple with a sincere praise by learning how to play the first verse of master of puppets. he was blindsided when eddie literally tears up because "no one had ever exerted that much effort for me."

it's steve who pulls eddie to his side in a hug, careful of eddie's guitar, and pressed a closed lip kiss on eddie's temple, saying "i'll learn the whole song for you, eddie."

(eddie couldnt help himself as he tells what steve did to wayne that night. wayne went "this harrington kid played guitar for you?" "that's what i've been telling you wayne!" and wayne knows how important playing the guitar is for eddie so he nods and said, "let me meet him sometime,")

steve doesnt know what happened because it seemed like they went two steps backward. steve gave eddie a leather jacket. at first, he thought eddie didn't like the idea of someone buying him something expensive. so steve reassured him by saying "that's mine, munson. mom gave it to last year but its not my style so i only wore it once to show her it fits."

(but inside eddie's panicking so much because for him, this is the equivalent of some jock giving their girl their letterman jacket. but for eddie, he loves leather jackets more. and the love of hi life is giving one to him)

eddie lets himself hug steve, one arm on the waist and the other on the shoulder. "thanks, stevie. i'll take care of this," he said before ruffling steve's hair. he waits for the usual teasing irritation about not to ruin his hair but none of that happens. instead, steve is giving him a look that eddie's been the subject of this past few months. a look that eddie's been giving to steve too when the other is not looking at him.

(steve replays the sensation of eddie's warm hugs at night and decides that he wants to be hugged like that for a long, long time.)

at some point of him just giving eddie gifts or doing something for eddie, steve realizes that more than loud and obvious show of affection that eddie do to others, steve prefers the soft "thanks, stevie", the cheery "you are the best, harrington", the teasing "i'll take you up on that offer, big boy"

so whenever eddie profess his eternal love for dustin, or his everlasting gratefulness for robin and nancy, or his untamed affection to lucas and max, or his loveable teasing to mike and will, or his brotherly affection to el, steve smiles because eddie has his own way to show and tell all of those that is reserved for steve only

(the way this went in my mind:

someone: does something nice for eddie

eddie: please marry me

steve: does something nice for eddie

eddie: thanks, steve

steve, irritated: why arent you asking me to marry you!?)

#this was supposed to be crack #not emotional #steve x eddie #steddie #steveddie #i love them your honor #theyre my emotional support ship in this trying times #yel's stvd posts

[pangur-and-grim]

I didn't want to talk about it until the whole horrible thing was over, but Wednesday slipped out an open door last week and (with the help of a motion-activated camera on the porch) we finally got him back last night!

he’s acting so sweet and cuddly today, it’s clear how happy he is to be home and safe inside.

#god though the day it happened was so scary #I've never physically exerted myself to the point where I thought I might fall over before #but we thought he might be hiding under a car so I walked around the neighbourhood from 8pm to 11:30pm checking under cars #which was sometime a bending/squatting motion if the car was high enough off the ground #and sometimes involved actually lying on the ground if it was a fancy low-rise car #I very quickly grew to loathe the low-rise car #but yeah I still getting back into shape after the 6 month book contract so doing 3 and half hours straight of adrenaline-fuelled squats was #very inadvisable. for three days afterward I had a hard time bending my legs bc of the muscle pain #but like literally did not notice the exertion while it was happening bc I was in 'oh fuck we need to find this cat' mode #we ended up plastering the neighbourhood in signs and pestering all our neighbours #which lead to several texted sightings that let us know he wasnt straying far from the house #so we set up a raccoon trap on the porch that DID NOT WORK #like he kept getting inside and eating all the food without tripping the trap? #so we'd adjust the sensitivity and the same thing would happen 💀 shitty trap #on night 5 we set up a motion activated camera so that we could make sure it was him eating the food #and holy shit. the stress of seeing him on the camera and not being able to open the door and grab him bc we knew he'd run and not come back #we literally WATCHED HIM ON THE CAM enter the trap and eat all the food without triggering it #and then he sat on the steps and groomed his face for 8 minutes straight while we whispered about what to do #eventually when he left the porch and started walking off we decided we could open the door without scaring him #(bc he was far enough away) #and so my housemate did that and started calling his name and opening cans of wet food to make the Good Food Sound #and holy shit. it worked #when we heard him meow back it was such a relief #they were such horrible distressed meows that we thought something had happened to injure him #but I think he was just vocalizing the emotions of being lost for 5 days and finally hearing his owner's voice #it took a few more minutes of coaxing for him to actually enter the house #he was a stray before my housemate took him in so the fear instinct is STRONG #but now today he's been cuddling up to us and letting us hold him for way longer than normal #and like I'm trying not to anthromorphise. but he's clearly so so happy to be back home and with the people he knows

[mypoisonedvine]

It’s Always The Quiet Ones... | college AU dark!Peter Parker x (slightly)naive!reader

for @nsfwsebbie​​‘s dream fic challenge, I was assigned to write something for @harryspet​​ which was vv exciting bc I love her stuff ;-; no pressure right? lol (also thank you to @evnscvll​​ for being my proofreader, sounding board, and partner for some very strange texting for the purpose of screenshots!)

Here is the prompt I got: peter is a dork and is weird and quiet, and the readers friends dared her to sleep with him. turns out he was really kinky and is really good at sex. can be dark.  And hoo boy, did I run with that.  I hope you like it!!

Word Count: 4.4k

Warnings: smut (it’s consensual but with dubcon undertones, manipulation, and implied coercion/dubcon at the end), stalking, blackmail, voyeurism, and general creepiness.  Oh yeah and there’s some degradation and dacryphilia in there for good measure.

You and your friends were in the middle of your daily cafeteria lunch, chatting about the same sorts of small talk you always did.  

“Oh god, it’s that weird guy from class!” Jackie blurted out suddenly around a mouthful of fries, pulling you out of the conversation you’d been having.  Everyone at the table whipped around and your eyes went wide. 

“Come on, don’t look all at once,” you hissed.  

“Who is this guy?” Cody asked, looking around with confusion.

“The guy in the blue hoodie over there,” Jackie answered, motioning toward him with her head.  It was Peter, setting down his tray of food and opening up his laptop, putting earbuds in.  He was pretty much always on his laptop, it seemed like.  He took a bite of his pizza before getting back to whatever he was working on.

“He looks normal, or normal-ish,” Mia shrugged.  

“No, no, you don’t get it,” you shook your head.  “We have him in Computational Physics on Tuesdays and Thursdays--”

“Plus Friday lab,” Jackie interjected.

“--and he’s… kinda…”

“Creepy,” Jackie concluded.

“No,” you denied, “not creepy.  He’s just… a bit awkward, I guess.”

“And he stares at you, like, the entire time we’re in class.  But won’t even talk to you.”

“Oh, that’s weird,” Mia agreed with a shudder.

“I don’t know,” you shrugged, “it’s kinda… sweet, maybe?  I mean, he’s just shy, right?”

“Oh my god you are such a slag!” Jackie teased, shoving you on the shoulder.  “You’re into him, aren’t you?”

“No!” you denied with wide eyes.  

“You’re just into the attention,” Cody rolled his eyes.

“I mean, it’s kind of flattering, isn’t it?” you admitted.  Jackie laughed.

“You should go over there and talk to him,” she decided.

“Nooooooooo, no way,” you shake your head.

“I kinda wanna see this,” Cody smirks.

“Literally just go over there and flirt with him, his head would explode,” Jackie suggested excitedly.

“I don’t even know how to flirt,” you chuckled.

“So you’re considering it!” Mia accused.

“I didn’t say that!” you squeaked.

“Pleeeeeease,” Jackie whined playfully.  “It’ll be funny.”

“I don’t usually sleep with people for comedic effect.”

“I’ll chip in $20 if you do it,” she offered immediately.  She turned to the rest of the table, “come on guys, we need to pool together and make her do it.”

“I’ve only got a ten,” Cody mumbled, pulling it out slowly before Jackie snatched it away.

“Okay, $30, who can make it $50?”

“Jackie, calm down,” you hissed.

“You’re telling me you wouldn’t sleep with him for $50?  He’s cute!”

“I have $35 and 67 cents,” Mia counted, shuffling through her wallet.

“Oh my god,” you groaned, your head falling into your hands.

“Just do it, for me,” Jackie said, suddenly sounding oddly serious.  You didn’t understand why it mattered so much, but you decided it couldn’t be that bad if you just did it.

“Fine, fine, just shut up and don’t stare at us,” you instructed, getting up to a ruckus of cheers.  You didn’t even take the money.

You walked across the cafeteria, messenger bag slung over your shoulder, and hoped you wouldn’t totally make an idiot of yourself.  If you hadn’t already just by talking to a guy over a dare.

He didn’t seem to notice you when you stood by his table, still focusing on his computer.

“Um, hey,” you waved, and Peter looked up at you as he took out his earbuds.

“Hi,” he replied quickly.

“What… what are you working on?” you asked, motioning to the laptop.  He didn’t stop looking at you, and he didn’t say anything.  “I… we have comp together?  You know who I am, right?”

“O-of course I do!” he suddenly perked up.  “Yeah, I just…” he trailed off and turned to his laptop.  “I was just working on this model.”

“Can I take a look?” 

He smiled a little, and moved his backpack out of the seat next to him.  “Go ahead!”

You sat down and leaned in to look at his screen.  

“It’s-- it’s not finished but, basically I just put the kinetic energy of an object on the x-axis, the potential energy on the y-axis--” 

You used the laptop’s touch screen to move the model around, impressed with his work.  “And the z-axis is the conservation of energy for work done on an object,” you finished.  

“Uh, yeah, exactly,” he nodded.

“It’s beautiful!” you realized, appreciating the variety of colors as each data point was suspended in the graph.  

“Do you do any modeling?” he asked you, and for a hot second it felt like a line.

“Um,” you laughed, “no, not much at least.  Nothing extracurricular.”

“Oh.”

“I’m more into abstract math, if I’m being honest.”

He smiled.  “Oh, you’re one of those.”

You laughed, shoving him on the shoulder playfully, but regretting it as you saw his smile drop a bit.  “People are so judgmental about abstract math, as if it isn’t the study of the founding principles of mathematics.”

“So you think adding a pineapple and a banana is the foundation of mathematics?” he quirked an eyebrow.

“Okay, there’s so much more to abstract mathematics than weird variables,” you frowned.  “Like basic functions on matrices!  Don’t act like it isn’t dope as fuck to add, subtract, multiply and divide matrices.  If you saw my whiteboard in my dorm you would understand.”

“If I had a whiteboard now I could prove to you that abstract math is overrated,” he countered.

“I’d love to see you try,” you scoffed.  You hadn’t really meant it literally.  

“I don’t have anything for the rest of the day,” he shrugged.  It took you a moment to realize he was suggesting to actually come to your room and talk about math.  You weren’t sure if that was even what would happen if you went back to your dorm…

You opened your mouth to say that you were busy, that you couldn’t, that you shouldn’t, so you were a little surprised when you heard yourself say “sure” instead.

And that was how you ended up sitting on your kitchen counter with Peter Parker between your legs, kissing you like you’d never been kissed before.

It sort of happened all at once.  He just grabbed you and you were confused but went with it, because life is short and he was cute and his hands felt unexpectedly wonderful as they gripped your back.

You gasped a bit when he started to pull your shirt over your head but he didn’t slow down, quickly removing his own-- oh, hello there six-pack, nice to meet you-- kissing you again as he wrapped his hands around your waist and slid you off the counter, guiding your legs to wrap around his hips.  He carried you to the bedroom with unexpected grace; he was so much stronger than he looked.  And he looked different than he ever had before as he tossed you down onto your bed and started to kiss his way down your abdomen while his fingers slipped under the waistband of your shorts.

“Oh god, Peter!” you yelped as he kissed along your thighs, pulling down your shorts and underwear and tossing them to the side.

“Say my name again,” he demanded before instantly latching onto your clit, sucking and licking directly onto the bundle of nerves.

And you really had no choice in the matter, his name pouring from your lips over and over, accentuated with a yelp as he shoved two fingers into you, finding and massaging your g-spot before you could even process everything you were feeling.

“Oh my god, fuck, Peter!” you hissed, your head falling back onto the mattress so hard it bounced a little.

You were barreling towards an orgasm faster than you probably ever had before.  This was nothing like the few other hook-ups you’d had since starting college-- it wasn’t even like the times you’d been alone with your hand or a vibrator.  This was like an assault on the senses, so powerful that you couldn’t even really keep track of the sounds you were making or anything that wasn’t his mouth on you and his fingers in you.

“I’m gonna come, oh my god, I’m gonna come don’t stop please--” you moaned as your words turned into mostly incoherent nonsense.  How could you be expected to form a sentence in these conditions?

Thankfully, he didn’t stop.  He kept lapping at your clit as if he hadn’t even noticed your pleading, his fingers twisting inside you even as your walls clenched so tightly around them that it became difficult to keep up the pace.  Your hips involuntarily bucked against his face, your legs quivered as he refused to give you any reprieve from the sensation, but he kept going.

“Oh fuck, fuckfuckfuck Peter I can’t-- it’s too much-- oh god,” you babbled, but it fell on deaf ears.  A small part of your brain was confused why he wouldn’t stop-- you hadn’t told him outright to stop but it was kind of implied, right?  Wasn’t it some amount of not okay that he was still going?  It made your gut sink in a way that was equal parts disturbing and erotic.  

You were trying to pull away but his arms wrapped around your thighs and held you down.  God, he was strong.  He looked kind of skinny in those hoodies he was usually wearing, but now that he was actually exerting some force he was clearly muscular.  You felt helpless and it, oddly enough, turned you on.

“Peter, please, oh my god, slow down I-- I can’t take any more,” you whimpered; your voice came out all high-pitched and squeaky and it would’ve been embarrassing if you had enough brainpower left to care.  

He groaned against your skin but said nothing, using his teeth to lightly graze your clit.  Your whole body jerked at that, a sob tearing from your lips suddenly.  It felt like you were past the point of orgasm now and just lost in some sort of aggressively intense world of pleasure-- it neared pain, really.  You had never been pushed to your limits like this; you hadn’t even realized that there were limits which one could be pushed to this way!  It was exhilarating and exhausting and overwhelming.  You fought tears from forming because it would be so embarrassing to cry right now, and he would probably freak out and think you were hurt or something… maybe you were hurt, you couldn’t even tell at this point.  But at this point, it was unstoppable.  You were fucking crying from the overstimulation and he hadn’t even put his cock in you yet.  Your face was so hot that your own tears felt cool as they poured down your cheeks.

Finally, he stopped when he heard your sobs.  But instead of concern or fear or confusion, his expression was simply joy.

“Oh, you look so cute when you cry,” he cooed, sliding back up your body to kiss your tears away as they fell.  Then he kissed your mouth, open and sloppy and aggressive, and the taste of yourself on his tongue made your head spin.

Before you could collect your thoughts, he pulled back and made quick work of his jeans and boxers-- fuck, he was big.  

“You’re too kind,” he grinned, discarding the clothes and stroking his cock a few times.

You hadn’t realized you had said it out loud, and you felt a little nervous but then he was on you again, kissing you roughly and forcing his tongue into your mouth.  You felt him reaching down, gripping his cock and rubbing it through your folds.  You were soaked, and swollen, and nearly sore.  Every time the tip slid over your clit, you jumped a little.

He pushed into you ever so slightly, moving the head of his cock inside you and nothing more.  You whined with confusion and anticipation, but he continued on teasing you.

“Please,” you whimpered into his kiss.

He pulled back and looked down at you, his eyes blown so wide that they looked like they’d gone black.  “What was that?” he asked, and you sighed because you knew he could hear you the first time.

“Please, Peter,” you repeated, louder, “I need more.”

“More…?”

You sobbed with frustration, and desire.  “Fuck me, please.”

He thrusted forward and you groaned as his cock stretched you open.  It was like night and day, how he went from slowly teasing you to slamming into your eager walls.  You cried out and gripped at his arms, just trying to steady yourself and maybe stop your skull from whacking the headboard if possible.

“You love it, don’t you?  You love my cock,” he growled.  His voice was lower, gravelly.  He sounded like an entirely different person.

“Yes,” you replied weakly.

“Say it,” he demanded.

No one had ever talked to you like this before and it made your cheeks burn.  “I-- I love your cock,” you stammered.  

He smiled and you hoped you’d done it right, and that he wasn’t smiling at your obvious nervousness or lack of experience.  You didn’t understand how this was normally supposed to go, because you didn’t normally hook up with people so casually-- you had just never really been interested in it.  But now that he was fucking you so hard you could barely breathe, you were starting to get the appeal.  God, your last boyfriend hadn’t even made you come in five months of dating, meanwhile five minutes with Peter had made you a sobbing mess.  Even now you were biting your lip to hold back your tears from the sheer intensity of the sensations you were experiencing.

“Oh, you poor thing,” he pouted condescendingly.  “You don’t wanna cry but you can’t help it, huh?  You’re my dumb little crybaby aren’t you?”

You tried not to react to that but you knew he felt your walls clench suddenly.

“You like that?  You like being my stupid whore?”

“S-stop,” you begged weakly, feeling beyond humiliated.

“But you like it, angel, I can tell.  Don’t lie to me.”

He reached down to swirl his thumb over your clit, laughing at the way you tensed up and tried to squirm away.

“Is it too much princess?” he asked, but the nickname read less sweet and more mocking.  “Isn’t this what you wanted?  You asked me to fuck you.  Begged me.  Now you act like you can’t take it, like you’re this delicate little flower and not the dirty fucking whore I know you are.”

“I-- I’m not a whore,” you denied even as you struggled to suppress your obvious arousal from the derogatory nature of his words.  You felt a little guilty for being into it, and slightly insulted, but fuck if it didn’t make your back arch and your throat dry and your pussy so excessively wet.

“Oh, don’t play dumb,” he scoffed.  “But, maybe you’re not playing.  You really are dumb, aren’t you?”

You logically knew that it was too late to deny anything he said, but you still clung onto your dignity as best you could.  “N-no!”

“Not all the time, just when you’re wet.  Isn’t that right?  You get so desperate for cock and you don’t wanna be smart, you just wanna be somebody’s brainless fuckdoll.”

That sounded so appealing in some forbidden, filthy way and all of a sudden you were going to come again, any second now.

“Yes!” you nearly screamed, falling into your pleasure.

“Come on my cock, baby,” he encouraged, “come for me.”

You didn’t even sound like yourself with the noises you made, or maybe it was just that you’d never had the chance to make noises like that before.  Either way, your orgasm crashed through you and nearly punched the air out of your lungs.  Your toes went numb.  You didn’t even know that could happen.  And most important of all, your walls tensed and fluttered so hard that he began moaning into your ear.

“Fuck, ‘m gonna come inside you.”  You couldn’t tell if it was a warning, like he was asking permission, or if he was just informing you of his intentions which you would be powerless to stop even if you told him not to.  You didn’t have to find out because you were on the pill, but it made you realize all too suddenly that you should’ve had him put on a condom-- how could you have forgotten?

His moans turned hoarse and with a growl and a tightened grip on your hips, he spilled deep in you, coating your walls as his length flexed and twitched inside you.  For a moment you were just stuck like that, his weight holding you down as he caught his breath, and finally he rolled to the side and you could breathe cool air again.

“That was…” he began but trailed off, pulling you closer and kissing your shoulder.  “You’re amazing.”

It was quite the shift from how he had been talking before.  It was comforting, but you were still a little confused.  “Really?”

He laughed softly.  “Did you not notice?  God, I’ve wanted you for so long…”

You were curious about where he was going with that, but then he suddenly sat up.

“Do you want some water?” he offered.

“Uh, yeah,” you smiled.  “The cups are in the cabinet just to the left of the microwave.”

He nodded and gave you a quick peck on the cheek before sliding out of the bed, slipping his boxers on over his still-hard cock which was now coated in your come and his, and dashing out of the room.

You were mostly content to just lay there, although you felt uncharacteristically sore between your legs, and quite… sticky.  You glanced over to your whiteboard and realized he never had any intentions of talking with you about abstract math.  Was this just a one-time thing, or was he going to come back and ask you out?  Were you boyfriend and girlfriend now?  Or were you just a clueless romantic who thought that sleeping together meant more than it really did?

You rolled over and saw Peter’s phone resting on the bedside table.  He must have set it there when he was stripping quickly while you two had been making out-- or that’s what you were pretty sure the order of events had been, it had all happened so fast…

At that exact moment, the screen lit up with a notification.  You were about to roll back and not look at all, until you got a glimpse of the words.

PHYS 507, row 3, seat 14

You furrowed your brow.  It looked like an alert for an upcoming class, except that this was your class, the one you had with him, and it wasn’t until tomorrow.  No assignments due today, either.  And what was with the row/seat thing?  Peter didn’t sit in the third row… you did.

You picked up the phone just enough to angle it to see the rest of the notification.  It wasn’t a calendar alert; it was a text message.  “PHYS 507, row 3, seat 14” was the contact name.  You could only get a preview of the message…

okay, it’s done isn’t it?  can you please delete those pic….

You were curious, or maybe just concerned.  Was the seat number supposed to be the person texting him?  How were you supposed to keep track of who sat where to know who it was?

It had to be somebody from your row, but it was just you, Jackie, and a bunch of random dudes that Peter had never seemed to have any interaction with.

You assumed you wouldn’t be able to unlock the phone to even try to snoop, which you didn’t want to do anyways, but when you slid your thumb over the screen, you gasped when it opened straight to the conversation.  Who didn’t put a password on their phone?

okay, it’s done isn’t it?  can you please delete those pictures now?  I did what you asked.  I won’t tell anyone.  just send me proof that the photos are gone, please.

You felt a little sick.  You had no idea what this meant but it scared you.  You saw the conversation from before but it didn’t make any sense.  You scrolled back up to try to figure out what they were talking about and gasped when you saw a picture Peter had sent to the contact.

It was Jackie.  But she wasn’t alone.  She was on her knees in the lab room, and you gagged when you realized what she was doing-- or really, who she was doing it to.  

She’d told you she had a casual thing with a new guy but refused to say who it was.  You realized why now.  She was fucking your professor, and you just knew she was doing it to get a better grade.  You had been trying to figure out how she was earning higher marks than you but never seemed to be able to discuss the class material.  It all made sense now, but it wasn’t a comforting feeling.

You scrolled down a bit to see the conversation after the photo, and your blood went cold as you read it.

You saw several more messages but you couldn’t bring yourself to read any of it.  You knew everything you needed to know.

You weren’t sure what inspired you to open his camera roll… of course you wouldn’t find anything comforting there.  But you had to see for yourself.

It was just a list of folders, so many you could keep scrolling for ages.  Each had a label and a thumbnail image.

The thumbnail of Jackie on her knees jumped out first.  PHYS 507, row 3, seat 14.  45 images.

A girl in a lacy bra posing for the camera.  PHYS 509, row 1, seat 8.  12 images.

Two girls making out in a crowded room, holding red solo cups.  ENGL 104, row 12, seat 5.  6 images.

A nude selfie in front of a mirror.  PHIL 108, row 2, seat 2.  14 images.

And then the one that made your heart stop.  It was a picture of you in a bikini, taken by a friend on spring break.  PHYS 507, row 3, seat 13.  1 image.

The second you jumped up, dropping the phone, he was there with your promised glass of water in hand.  

“What’s wrong?” he asked innocently.  Just a second of silence was enough for him to pick up his phone from the floor and realize what had happened with a grin.  “Oh, that,” he sighed, slipping it into his pocket after looking down at it with a sort of loving look, like he was proud of his work.  “I suppose it’s my fault for leaving my phone right there, without a password, knowing I would get a text from Jackie any minute.”

“You wanted me to see it,” you grimaced, “you wanted me to see what you did to my friend.  What you did to all those girls.”

“I didn’t do anything.  They do all the heavy lifting, I just hack them and get pictures of it.  Or, in your friend’s case, I hack them, find out they’re fucking the professor, and follow them to their next rendezvous.”

“You’re fucking sick,” you spat, and he just shrugged.  “You’d better delete those photos of Jackie.”

“I will, don’t worry,” he soothed.  “It’s a shame though, she was pretty prolific.  You, on the other hand, you’re a good girl.  You even had pretty good security, I respect that.  Here’s a tip: your ISP creates the intranet that your wireless webcam uses to connect to your laptop.  It’s password protected, but it defaults to your phone number, and most people never change it.  Including yourself.”

You shivered.  “You watched me with it, didn’t you?”

“Well, I had to since you didn’t have any good photos of yourself.  And you do a decent job of erasing your porn history… but not a perfect job.  You watch some interesting stuff.  And you look so hot with your hand stuffed in your panties, rubbing yourself to whatever nasty shit you’re watching...”

“Shut up,” you demanded, covering your ears, “stop, please.  This is so fucked up.”

He laughed a little.  “You look better in person though.  A webcam could never capture how perfect you look when you come.”

“Please just stop,” you sobbed.

“Stop what?  I’m just telling you the truth.”

“I should’ve listened to my friends.  You’re a freak.”

“Hmm, you seemed to like it before.”

“Just delete those pictures of Jackie… and let me go…” you seethed.

“I will,” he promised.  “But, I need something to make up for the loss of some great spank bank material.”

You felt sick.  But what else was new?

“I need to finally get some good pictures of you.  Come on, isn’t it sad that your folder is so empty?” he pouted, pulling the phone back out from his pocket. “I could ruin a lot of lives with these folders.  Just let me take a few photos and you can spare them all the humiliation.  Nothing I haven’t seen you do before.”

You really really wanted to just deck him, but you knew he could probably release those photos with just one push of a button.  He was prepared.

“Don’t post them,” you pleaded.

“You’ll be good?”

You clenched your jaw.  “I’ll be good,” you answered through your teeth.

“Oh, look at you,” he cooed, “such a sweet girl you are.  Helping out your friend even after she threw you into the lion’s den to protect her secret.”

You hadn’t thought about it that way.  A pit formed in your stomach.

“Now come over here and get on your knees,” he grinned, turning on the camera.    

#peter parker x reader #tom holland x reader #dark!peter parker #dom peter parker x sub reader #dark!peter parker x reader #dom!peter parker #dom!peter parker x sub reader #spiderman x reader #night monkey x reader #lmao #peter parker smut #tom holland smut #tom holland x y/n #peter parker x y/n #sabs dream fic challenge

[shima-draws]

Aww yeahhh time for Kiyo to make his entrance!

I wrote an entire essay about him (again whoops) so it’s very long and under the cut for your viewing pleasure ;)

Kiyo

Age: 29

Hair color: Green

Eye color: Brown

Element: Stars

Kiyo, the Guildmaster of the Asterstone Guild! He only took up the position recently and has had the Guildmaster title for about a year and a half. He was the previous record holder for youngest Guildmaster until that title was stolen by Taku. (Kiyo holds a grudge about it but it’s playful.) 

Kiyo, just like lots of other characters in ATS, was taken in by the Asterstone Guild at a young age. He’s similar to Shima in that he has no previous memories before showing up outside the guild one day, battered and bruised. (That marks three characters in this series with amnesia now! Wrow) He grew up under the watchful eye and tutelage of the previous Guildmaster, and because of how attached to him she’d gotten, it wasn’t long before he began to express desires to take over the guild once she retired. After a lot of thought and contemplation she eventually handed over the position to him. This initially resulted in a lot of outrage from the guild members because they did not think Kiyo was suited to be the Guildmaster, but he eventually proved them wrong once he stepped up to the plate and showed them he could act like a true leader!

They did have good reason to be nervous about that, though, as Kiyo is normally a very laid-back and carefree person and is strictly non-violent. This has lead into lots of situations where he’s opted out of fighting, leading his guildmates into lots of trouble when they needed a hand, and they labeled him as both a coward for avoiding necessary battles on missions (which is practically a requirement for a guild member going out on dangerous quests, you sort of have to have a battle prowess to take on any foes) and lazy for not participating when he should. Initially this bothered Kiyo a great deal, but the previous guildmaster assured him that not everybody is suited for battling others, and that he can still pave his own way to success in a non-violent manner. While Kiyo may not have a liking for fighting, he has an extremely smooth tongue and is very capable of talking himself out of sticky situations (mostly by bribing. He is VERY good at that lmao). He has a talent for manipulating others into doing what he wants them to, though he rarely uses this on people he considers friends. When Kiyo’s able to complete a mission and win the day without resorting to using their elemental powers in a fight, his guild members have to stop and think for a second like. Hold on. He just did that so easily, he made it look so simple, we really need to stop underestimating him and calling him totally useless (Kiyo: Hey. HEY).

Kiyo’s pretty close to all of his guildmates despite their constant ribbing—the one person he’s close to that adores him completely is Lacie, because he was the person to bring her into the guild (she was around 10, he was 17), and being the first person to genuinely show her kindness that wasn’t for ulterior motives, Lacie became very attached to him. Kiyo acts like an older brother to her, and Lacie supports him in whatever he does. She was thrilled when he took on the Guildmaster position, and he has a very soft spot for her :’) She always sings his praises to anybody outside who will listen, and gets angry at Emrys the one time he called Kiyo incompetent.

After becoming the guildmaster, Kiyo actually does a good job at taking charge despite the general opinions that he wouldn’t. He’s still very casual about it though and is a bit more flexible with how the guild is run, preferring to let the guild members do things their own way and be less strict about the overall rules. He’s basically got the “Do whatever you want!” and “Just wing it!” outlook, and while a lot of the members don’t like this attitude, a lot of them do. At the end of the day they all do respect him, though! While he isn’t a fighter he’s very good at giving orders and keeping things in check around Asterstone lol

Despite Kiyo’s insistence on staying out of battles, he’s actually an extremely skilled fighter, and is probably the strongest and most dangerous person in the entire guild. The issue with this, though, is that whenever he gets into a fight, he tends to get too “serious” and starts going off the walls, treating the battle as a game and something fun and entertaining. This leads into him not knowing when to stop, and nobody else being able to stop him, so he’s seriously injured other people without meaning to—revealing that he’s actually terrified of violence because he loses himself in it, and why he prefers to stay on the sidelines. It’s only when Kiyo gets really serious in battles that a darker side comes out, and where the star mark in his eye appears. It’s only been seen a few rare times throughout his life at the guild, so nobody really thinks much of it or notices it. It’s only after the star mark appears that Kiyo passes out afterwards, having exerted a lot of power and extremely skilled battle prowess nobody has ever seen before. However, after a grand guild tournament where Kiyo faces off against Taku and gets too into it, revealing his star mark and almost slicing Taku’s head clean off, one of Kiyo’s advisors at the guild starts to look into it out of concern for both Kiyo’s safety and that of others.

In the middle of all this mess, Kiyo meets Toru, and after nearly forcing him to join Asterstone, the two start growing closer 👀 Toru joins the squad of not putting up with Kiyo’s bullshit, but that’s only after he gets over his starstruck fanboy phase. Because Toru is newer to the guild and because he’s a non-elemental not suited for fighting, Kiyo instantly becomes attached to him, finding similarities in their preferences and backgrounds. While Toru does think Kiyo’s an idiot sometimes he treats him very kindly, and is usually the first to defend him when the other members playfully tease him, so Kiyo’s just like you are an angel sent from heaven just for me and I adore you. Still though with Toru being a non-elemental Kiyo stresses about his safety CONSTANTLY, even after Toru gets official training in self defense. If Toru’s in danger Kiyo will blow off literally everything else to go rescue him first, which the other members have to get used to as it happens more often than they’d like akdasbmlads

Later down the line the guild is caught up in something terrible, and find themselves being targeted by a descendant of a great inventor and sorcerer (not Elymas this time tho lol). She’s apparently seeking what’s known as the Velle Nova, and has reason to believe Asterstone is in possession of it. After Kiyo’s forced to fight and unleashes the power behind his star mark, the descendant reveals that Kiyo has the Velle Nova, and then the truth finally comes out…

Kiyo remembers everything about his past. Years ago, his town had been caught up in a great disaster, and he was the only survivor. He was forcibly taken in by several scientists, one of them being the ancestor of the girl descendant. They were attempting to recreate the Velle Nova, one of the great sorcerer Elymas’ inventions, which is said to grant any sort of wish imaginable. They wanted to claim that power for themselves and possess the powers of the universe itself. However every attempt had failed, and without the real Velle Nova they couldn’t achieve what they were after. So they decided to pour all of their research into Kiyo instead, and try to create the weapon inside of a human being. This ended up making a twisted, broken version of what should have been the Velle Nova. But Kiyo couldn’t contain its power—it was going to unravel the universe itself and either destroy everything or alter it tragically into something unimaginable. One of the scientists working with the group realized how awful their experiment was and, being a Time elemental, decided to erase Kiyo’s memories (with some help) and send him centuries into the future so that the rest of the group couldn’t get their hands on him. Hence Kiyo winding up outside of Asterstone with no memories, and the truth behind his star mark. It had been granting Kiyo his wish the whole time—the longing to protect the things he cares about by being able to defeat any threat in his way. Of course with the unstable power that he can’t control, it usually leads into disaster;;

Kiyo, now having recovered his memories, realizes that the same thing is going to happen again, and decides to seal himself off to protect Asterstone and the world before the universe unravels. Cue an epic PMD-esque goodbye scene where he bids farewell to Toru, gives him his trademark scarf, and vanishes, escaping into a dimension between time and space where his power can be contained. *Starts playing I Don’t Want To Say Goodbye*

Toru, absolutely devastated by Kiyo’s farewell, decides he’s going to break time and space to save his man, except there’s one small issue...nobody else remembers that Kiyo even existed, and Toru only managed to by some miracle (and also maybe bc Kiyo handed him his scarf idk some magic soul connection thing). But after a while...a long while, maybe like a year or more...they finally unlock the key to finding Kiyo!!

Toru and Kiyo share a tearful reunion, and Kiyo cries a lot because it had been so lonely sitting in that black hole all by himself for so long. Toru begs Kiyo to come back, and suggests that Kiyo separate himself from the Vella Nova in order to live a normal life, but Kiyo informs him that he and the Vella Nova...are the same. They’re the same combined entity! Kiyo says that if he tries to unfuse, he’ll just end up destroying himself, because there’s nothing to separate, being one singular existence. So Toru points out uh hey since you’re the same thing, don’t you get a say on how your power is used? “It’s your power, Kiyo” yes we’re referencing Tododeku here we go

Kiyo’s like hmm uh yeah I guess you have a point;; so we went through all that for nothing huh. And Toru tells him you’re a fucking moron and Kiyo’s like ahh yes but you loved this moron enough to come rescue him from the void ;) And they kinda sorta confess but not really? Kiyo’s too nervous and Toru’s too distracted trying to figure out how to get them out of there but no worries they sort it out later. Kiyo tells him that hey I’m still dangerous and I could lose control at any given moment and Toru’s just like well I guess we’ll just have to stop you and bring you back to yourself. So with the knowledge that he’s got a whole guild of awesome people backing him up and a boy who broke the laws of the universe to save his ass, Kiyo and Toru escape the rift and finally return home together 💕 And that’s pretty much how their arc ends!

Extra personality traits

-He has a really short attention span so this makes things painfully hard on mission briefings, which leads to Kiyo usually screwing up the mission one way or another

-He often charges ahead without thinking and is the first one to become a target in a bad situation. Nobody really feels bad for him though because most of the time it’s his fault for walking right into it LMAO

-He can be very childish sometimes and most of the time he does it on purpose. His guildmates complain that their leader is a whiny, immature brat

-He is an expert on how to annoy people do not test him oh my god

-He can be incredibly selfish;; He’s gotten better with it during recent years, but he got scorned for it a lot when he was younger. He’s also very emotional, and you can read what he’s thinking like an open book! When his friends can’t read him that’s when they start getting worried.

-He has no experience in romance whatsoever and it’s the one (1) thing that can get him flustered. Nobody at the guild has ever seen Kiyo get mildly embarrassed or caught off guard, so they begin to think it’s impossible to make him blush. Then Toru shows up and ruins everything lmao

-He has a great sense of humor and can always make others laugh! He’s also very mischievous and sometimes plays pranks on other members of his guild.

-He’s very stubborn when he wants something and not in a good way. He also pouts a lot when he gets like this

-He loves his guild and his guild members man :'( If any of them are ever in any real danger he's quick to offer himself up first as a target. He's protective of his friends and will do anything to keep them safe!

-A very very affectionate person. He mostly shows this through physical acts like hugging and generally touching other people. In return he also craves affection and gets very soft when it’s given back to him. I’d probably say he’s a little touch starved despite being in close contact with others all the time lol

#Me: Time for a new OC! *Writes a novel-length essay about their background* #Kiyo #Among the Stars #ATS #Shima's OCs #This took me way too long to write fnaskbldads god #Original character #Character art #Character design #Digital art #Art #Character sheet #Character reference #Shima arts #Long post #shima-draws

[badapricot]

I agree with everything you said. While I wish they WOULD talk about it, because kink play is something that should absolutely be thoroughly negotiated(SSC and RACK are some of the main tenets of every kink community I've ever been involved in), I also think them discussing it that openly is unlikely. In all BL shows that have a significant power dynamic(DeanPharm and TinCan come to mind), there's no actual discussion of what it is they're doing(though Tin does actively give Can speech restrictions as soon as they're together, and Can offers up honorifics in turn(and suggests Daddy/boy play)). Is that simply because in BL shows acknowledging the concept of BDSM is taboo, or is it indicative of a larger attitude in Thailand towards BDSM?

I thought Gene might be into consensual nonconsent! Right before they had sex in ep 9, Nubsib says that he won't allow Gene to change his mind, and Gene actually gives a small smile and nods. Do you think Nubsib knew that Gene would be into that? And do you think Nubsib would follow through on not listening to a no? And if he did, would Gene enjoy that? I do see Gene enjoying not being allowed to say no to sex, but I think that kink would require more discussion than they're likely to have.

I think you're right about punishment too. Even when Nubsib wasn't happy with Gene because he met up with Aey, there was no yelling or anything, just a gentle "Do you know what you did wrong?", face stroking, and telling Gene he was either "jealous" or "protective"(frustrating translations bc those words mean VERY different things--sidenote, can you tell me what Nubsib was actually trying to communicate?). And Gene looked entranced by that reaction.

Tysm for responding!

Btw, regarding what you said about Gene going quiet and nodding after Nubsib told him that he could only be generous with Nubsib from now on, I decided to rewatch that scene, and not only does Gene nod, but the corners of his mouth quirk up ever so slightly as he does so. I can't believe I never noticed that! I was probably just too busy being unsettled by Nubsib exerting that level of control out of the blue. Nubsib also didn't seem surprised that Gene agreed, he just had this stern, annoyed look on his face, like Gene had been disobedient. I think it was one of the first hints of where their relationship would end up going. Do you think Nubsib will continue to institute rules like this as their relationship progresses?

Your ask is really long so I’ll answer it in parts.

Is that simply because in BL shows acknowledging the concept of BDSM is taboo, or is it indicative of a larger attitude in Thailand towards BDSM?

I think large power differences and D/s relationships aren’t acknowledged in BL because in Thailand (and honestly even outside of Thailand) the idea of BDSM is restricted to black-red-and-leather shows like KinnPorsche or tacky things like 50 Shades.

Right before they had sex in ep 9, Nubsib says that he won't allow Gene to change his mind, and Gene actually gives a small smile and nods. Do you think Nubsib knew that Gene would be into that? And do you think Nubsib would follow through on not listening to a no? And if he did, would Gene enjoy that?

I think that Nubsib knew Gene would be into that the same way that he knew Gene wouldn’t be that bothered by him chasing him around the room. I don’t think Nubsib would follow through on not listening without getting non-verbal consent from Gene, like a nod.

Even when Nubsib wasn't happy with Gene because he met up with Aey, there was no yelling or anything, just a gentle "Do you know what you did wrong?", face stroking, and telling Gene he was either "jealous" or "protective"(frustrating translations bc those words mean VERY different things--sidenote, can you tell me what Nubsib was actually trying to communicate?).

The literal translation was, “Gene, do you know? Besides being worried/protective over you, I’m jealous/possessive too.” The words can go either way because of the context. I agree that Nubsib never gets angry enough at Gene to raise his voice, he just wants Gene to be safe, happy, and within his eye line.

Do you think Nubsib will continue to institute rules like this as their relationship progresses?

I’ve said before that I think he would because Nubsib is weirdly controlling about petty things. Just in the last episode, we’ve seen that he’s bothered by Gene not drying his hair and him looking at his phone instead of the TV (when SIb’s show is playing). I also think Nubsib knows Gene is soft-hearted, naive, and a space case, which is why he gives him some rules to keep him safe. Like what happened with Aey would not have happened if Gene was more street smart and let Nubsib know where he was or if he trusted him and didn’t go at all.

#lovely writer #lovely writer the series #gene x nubsib #meta #Anonymous

[ayatosmlktea]

𝐢𝐝𝐢𝐨𝐭𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞

Synopsis: What happens when two idiots have feelings for each other but are too shy to do anything about it. 

Kageyama x fem!Reader

A/N: Writing for Kageyama scared me more than I thought it would. But anyone here’s my first fic for Haikyuu! 

Based on the prompt: Cuddling in the backseat of the car - except it’s a bus. 

Thank you @mysteriousmagicx​ for giving me this beautiful idea. @huntersbunker​ this is for the both of us after having our hearts ripped out...and for @mysteriousmagicx​ bc I feel like you’ve been having a hard time. 

Also thank you for 600 followers!!!!!!!!!! I don’t know where you all came from but I hope you stick around. I’m incredibly grateful for each one of you T.T 

No one was sure how two idiots had managed to fall for each other and be so completely oblivious to the other person’s feelings. It was common knowledge that Kageyama and Y/N had feelings for each other, but they were so daft at picking up on it that it was almost painful to watch.

 It didn’t matter how many times Tanaka and Noya teased him after practice that Y/N had a thing for him, Kageyama always managed to pull some lame excuse out of his ass. Y/N always showing up to practice despite not having any affiliation with the volleyball club just meant that she didn’t have anything else to do. She was Kiyoko’s friend, this was their way of hanging out, despite everyone noticing that her eyes never left his form.

“I can’t believe you call me a dumbass when you can’t even see that Y/N likes you” Hinata’s comment had earned him a special serve to the back of the head.

His team was adept at picking up on his subtle hints, the tips of his ears turning red whenever Y/N would compliment his tosses or the way his spikes would hit a little harder around her. 

The not so subtle glares Kageyama shot at Hinata when the spiker would easily make conversation with her, complimenting how pretty she looked that day.

 It was equally cute and sickening at the same time, her puppy eyes just begging for his attention and his lack of social skills desperately trying to find the right words to say served as entertainment. It had gotten to the point where the team had started placing bets on who would make the first move.

However, it seemed highly unlikely that the pair would be getting together any time soon. Any time their hands brushed together they both pulled away, races flushed red while Y/N screamed out apologies before running out of the gym covering her face with both hands.

The embarrassment alone would’ve made anyone else stop showing up to practice, but Y/N was just as persistent as she was timid. Kageyama rarely smiled, but when he did, no matter how faint it was,  the feeling of her heart racing lingered for hours.

 It didn’t matter how many times she complimented him, or stayed after practice was over to help Tobio and Hinata throw balls, he was good at keeping his feelings to himself. If it hadn’t been for the entire team groaning that Kageyama did in fact like her she would have given up long ago, settling to suffer in silence while he continued to hold her heart in his hands. Sighing into her pillow, Y/N felt exhaustion creeping up on her. Closing her eyes Y/N drifted off to sleep with usual thoughts of the empty space beside her being occupied by him.

✧*ﾟ✧*ﾟ✧*ﾟ

The ecstatic roars of the crowd were still playing in her ears as they made their way back to the bus, like the sound of waves crashing over the shore. The goosebumps on her arms had yet to calm down, every flashback of their win against Aoba Johsai had her stomach tightening with lingering nervous energy. 

Watching Kageyama in his element felt like coming up for air after being underwater, it was an awakening of passion that nothing else quite compared to. Every second of the game had her heart in her throat, her palms were constantly sweating with nerves. She had been so high on adrenaline that she couldn’t restrain herself from jumping into his arms shouting praises at him before the smug expressions of his team mates graciously slapped her senses back to reality.

“Uh g-good game guys!” Y/N shouted before running off, her face crimson with embarrassment.  Kageyama had been so flustered by the feeling of Y/N’s arms and legs wrapped around his body that his brain had quite literally shut down. 

The smell of her shampoo lingered, her perfume sticking to his jersey. His face hadn’t felt this hot even during their final set of the match. It felt like his heart was going to burst through his chest. He had been perfectly fine with keeping things the way they were, too insecure to believe that she might actually have true feelings for him.

 He knew he could be cold, and not the most expressive person when it came to being affectionate but he couldn’t silence the part of him that hoped she really did have feelings for him.

Once they were all ready to leave, Kageyama had made up a stupid excuse on the spot to get Y/N to wait back with him. Taking longer than necessary to pack his bag, pointedly ignoring the looks his teammates were giving him. When he was absolutely sure that everyone had gotten onto the bus he finally zipped his bag up, avoiding all eye contact with her out of fear that his face would heat up again. 

The devilish smirks from Hinata and Tanaka were enough to make him want to bury his face into his jersey. It didn’t help that the only two seats left were at the back of the bus.

Y/N didn’t seem to think anything weird of it, taking the window seat and dropping her bag to the ground. Kageyama couldn’t concentrate on anything except the warmth from her thigh pressing against his. Their arms were brushing against each other and he had to fight every nerve in his body not to jerk away. 

The ride back to school was long, and despite not even having exerted any physical energy the excitement from the match had Y/N quickly falling asleep. The weight of her head leaning against his shoulder barely registered in his mind as Kageyama was already asleep.

His head resting on top of hers, it was both strange and endearing to see him with his guard down looking so peaceful. Suga’s eyes widened before a small smirk tugged at the corner of his lips. Hinata and Tanaka had already pulled out their phones, audibly snapping pictures whispering how cute they would look as a couple. The photos would most definitely be used as blackmail to get Kageyama to confess his feelings for her. 

“There’s no way he won’t confess once he sees these.” Hinata grinned. 

“Even if he does, we’ll just show them to Y/N” Tanaka countered. 

“You put too much faith in them, they’re both idiots” Tsukishima mumbled. 

#halkyuu!! #haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #kageyama tobio #kageyama x reader #haikyuu blog #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu fanfiction #tobio x reader #haikyuu kageyama #kageyama imagines #kageyama fanfiction #karasuno x reader

[stvpidinlove]

[ RONEN RUBINSTEIN, HE/HIM, CIS MAN ]  —  [ SHILOH ECKHAUS ]  is a child of  [ THANATOS ]  with the power of  [ DEATH NEGATION ] .  they were born in  [ 1994 ]  and have been in nemean lion since  [ 2010 ] .  with the change, they  [ HAVE GRADUATED FROM ]  the  [ STANDARD ]  role which makes sense since they’re usually  [ READING BIOGRAPHIES & WATCHING NATURE DOCS ] .  if you’d like to meet them try the  [ MOON ]  building .

anyway...i have a disease where i have to write angsty men regularly

BASICS

hometown: boone, north carolina

eye color: blue

hair color: brown

height: 5′10

sexuality: bisexual

birthday: november 7, 1994 ( scorpio )

BIO

i think...thanatos has a thing for damaged women, and another thing for women who just want to help others, and ruth eckhaus was both. he draws women in who either hate themselves or can find the good in him, which isn’t easy to find. thanatos was cold and often volatile but there was something in him to love. so she didn’t do anything wrong in falling for the literal personification of death, but she made a mistake when she got pregnant.

even if he had been mortal, ruth never thought he was the kind of man who would stick around, even less likely when the ultrasound revealed she was pregnant with twins. part of her was unsurprised, since he’d mentioned having a twin brother.

the twins were born after a hard, long labor, which ruth swore was ripping her apart inside. but she survived, and she was happy for two healthy babies, because she knew she could never put herself through that again.

she met a man when the twins were still young, who wasn’t bad, especially compared to the father of her children. but he said a similar mysteriousness and she often didn’t know where he was or what he was doing. it got better once they got married, but when the police came knocking asking about his whereabouts on the day a young woman was taken (and later killed) a few miles away, she didn’t have a good answer.

with very little evidence, her husband was sentenced to life in prison, and while she never once wavered in her belief of his innocence, it wasn’t as black and white for shiloh. the prosecution had presented a compelling argument, at least that’s what the jury had thought. and at the age of eight, shiloh might have agreed.

his already tenuous relationship with his step-father became even more strained, visiting prison regularly with his mother and sister, but as he got older, it became his choice and he didn’t often want to be there, in that place, seeing the only father he’d ever known like that.

shiloh had always been a quiet, slightly moody child, which only got worse once his father was sent away and his mother was forced to pick up the slack on top of paying the newly incurred legal fees. since shiloh and ariel had each other, they didn’t always notice how harried their mother was, or how isolated they had become at school, because no matter what they’d always have each other.

when the twins were fourteen, riding bikes but already dreaming of getting their permits, ariel challenged shiloh to a race and set off down the street. she looked behind her shoulder to jeer at him when she was hit by a car. she died almost immediately on impact, by which time the driver was long gone.

shiloh didn’t know about his power yet, or...not really. he’d once seen a dead baby bird, the sight twisting his stomach, a nausea which only grew stronger when the bird suddenly got up and started squawking for its mother. he wasn’t sure why the relief of being wrong about the bird made him feel worse, or why he had a headache for the remainder of the day.

but when he ran over to ariel and watched her breathe her last breaths, he grabbed her hand and begged her not to leave him. he’d never wanted anything so desperately in his life, and after a few minutes of crying, he was starting to feel faint himself. his breathing grew more and more shallow, as if the life was leaving his body, but then he saw ariel inhale. in fact, it was the last thing he saw before he blacked out.

he awoke in a hospital bed next to his sister, who by all accounts, was perfectly fine aside from some cuts and bruises. somehow, shiloh was the one sore all over and struggling to get air into his lungs. they looked at each other, simultaneously understanding what had happened, and quietly agreed not to tell anybody else.

but their mother, knowing the truth of their paternity, was immediately suspicious and terrified, so she sent them off to nemean lion the next year in the hopes that neither of her children would die before her.

RANDOM FACTS

sooooo yeah shiloh is an Emo Boy but can you blame him, no <3 maybe he’s valid but i’ll only say that once

basically he brought his sister back to life when they were kids and nearly died himself with the energy exerted and he’s never brought another human being back to life since (and doesn’t plan on ever doing it again)

i guess you could say he...respects the circle of life? he doesn’t want to play, ahem, god, so when someone dies he just accepts this as being a part of life. but ariel’s death was so sudden that he didn’t think before bringing her back, nor did he fully know what he was doing

but he’s pretty sure he could never survive without her and he doesn’t actually know, realistically, what he’d do if she ever died again

POSSIBLE CONNECTIONS

maybe someone he dislikes but is friends with ariel, or vice versa?! they’re both assholes so this seems unrealistic but uwu

that said, someone who wants to be his friend fsr, or just acts like one without him ever actually acknowledging their friendship /:

i suppose he could bond with someone over not knowing what the heck they’re doing here or what to do with their life or ahhhh!!

he’s been at nl for a decade so mb he do have at least one good friend who he’s almost actually kind of vulnerable around and knows him better than most people

someone who just likes to annoy him bc he is no fun but it entertains them to get on his nerves idk u kno the vibe

#the written at 5am energy of this :) #nlintro #𝙵𝙸𝙻𝙴𝙳 𝚄𝙽𝙳𝙴𝚁 ( 𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒓𝒐 ) * shiloh

[dekuscrybaby]

Bakugou with a reader that is anorexic? Maybe bc she wants to look better in her hero outfit or she wants to be more like the rest of the girls in 1-A? Sorry if it’s a triggering topic!

hi, love!! thank you for requesting this!! i’m sorry it took a bit of time, i had to do a little bit of research so i don’t offend anyone who is dealing with something like this. i’m hoping i did i decent job at this but i’m sorry if it’s inaccurate or offensive, please feel free to educate me if something is wrong or too stereotypical. this is considered a triggering topic so i’ll be sure to add a warning and put the hcs under the cut for the sake of everyone. before you read, i just want to say that if you are dealing with something like this that you’re beautiful!! everyone deserves to feel great in their skin and seeking help does not mean you’re weak or anything, i hope every one of you is well. please stay healthy and my inbox and dms are open if you ever just want to chat or get something off your chest! also remember that society sucks ass and their opinion does not matter, you’re freaking awesome regardless!

TW: eating disorder below the cut!!!

bakugou with a fem s/o who’s anorexic

i’m going to be honest with you and i’m sorry if this sounds blunt but it’s what i hc

bakugou does not care what you look like!!!

you will always and i mean ALWAYS be beautiful to him in his eyes

he might not say it but he genuinely believes you are the most beautiful girl he’s seen and that’s kinda obvious bc he’s with you for a reason and that’s bc you're beautiful inside and out 😌💅

you’re his distraction from hero work 😳 but he really doesn’t mind bc you’re so damn pretty

now actually addressing the request!

bakugou is deadass head empty on hero course work so he might not notice the subtle signs of anorexia

he does notice that you stopped eating lunch with him as much as you used to but you would always use the school work as an excuse

and who is he to deny his girl his education?

so you’re in the clear for a little while until he starts to notice you look a bit sick

your once vibrant eyes now look dead and sunken in

but he just thinks you’re staying up too late for homework

he can only remind you to sleep some more before putting that thought aside

he next notices how your hair begins to fall out in clumps when he tries to run his fingers through your hair 

“it’s an allergic reaction to this hair mask i did the other night” he doesn’t quite believe it but he doesn’t want to doubt you so he’ll let it slide again

he starts to become extra suspicious when he finally gets you to eat lunch with him after so long

he notices that you’re adding a bunch of numbers together while you’re pointing at each item in your lunch 

his eyebrows are furrowed and he’s questioning why you’re counting until he notices a litter of bruises along your arm as your blazer rides up a little

instantly grips your arm and questions you

“why’re you bruised?”

“huh?”

he glances down at your exposed thighs and notices that your skirt fits a lot looser than he remembers

now that he’s looking at it, your blazer seems to fit loose too, and your shirt

“babe, what’s going on?” his voice is stern but not too angry, he’s dialing it back for you

you rip your arm from his grip, wincing as your skin is a lot more sensitive since you’ve stopped eating

“nothing” you grumble before leaving the cafeteria and going into the bathroom 

you can’t help but glance over your reflection, feeling sick at what you see, but that’s not your fault, your mind has been taken over by this disorder

as you’re poking around your tummy and thighs, mumbling about how you feel “disgusting”

the bell rings and you sigh before walking back to class, avoiding bakugou on your way back

the lack of food in your system makes it hard for you to concentrate in class so you’re almost dozing off until you hear everyone move around and suddenly bakugou’s in front of your desk

“are you deaf or something now?”

“hmm?”

“we’re practicing hand-to-hand combat, go get dressed in your gym uniform”

you do as your you’re told, making sure to change in a bathroom stall bc you don’t want to hear any remarks from your friends over how “disgusting” you look

you walk out onto the training field and bakugou’s eyes rake over your figure and this uniform also fits a lot more looser than he remembers

he’s slowly piecing it together but it’s still not completely pieced

he’s still deep in thought trying to figure out what’s going on and that’s when you’re called up for your turn

the moment you begin to exert your body, you pass out

bakugou goes ape shit after this and does not hesitate to take you to the nurse’s office 

seeing as you’re lacking nutrients, your instantly hooked onto an iv so you can regain everything you’ve been losing up to this point

bakugou had to plead and beg in order for recovery girl to let him in on what was happening

it took a lot of pleading and begging

once he’s filled in, he feels like a shitty boyfriend for not noticing sooner and he plans to have a few words with you when you wake up

so when you do wake up, you feel a something rough circling on the back of your hand and you freak out a little

you accidentally tug on the iv and it makes you a little uncomfortable until bakugou begins to comfort you, trying to make sure you don’t injure yourself 

once you’re calm, he stares at you with this look in his eyes that looks both angry and concerned, but it’s more concerned than anything

“what the hell was going through your mind, dumbass?”

“what are you talking about?” you still don’t want him to know

he sighs, “the old hag told me everything already. please, just let me in, tell me what’s wrong.”

you look away from his intense stare “nothing’s wrong”

“y/n, you passed out during training! and it wasn’t even bc you’ve been overworking yourself, you’ve been starving yourself. what’s going on?”

something about the look in his eyes and tone of his voice brings out the tears

you didn’t mean to worry him, but you did

so you spill 

“i’m so sorry.”

“hey, hey, hey. don’t be sorry. just tell me what’s wrong, maybe i can help,” he rubs gentle circles into your wrist

“i just- i hate the way i look. every time i look at myself, i feel so gross. especially in my hero suit and i found myself wanting to be as thin as the other girls. so i thought that if i stopped eating or at least limited my calorie intake, i’d lose all the unwanted weight.”

as you’re telling your story, bakugou’s frowning because he feels like he could’ve done a better job at expressing just how perfect you are in his eyes

“i didn’t think this would lead me into passing out and worrying you, i’m sorry for being stupid.”

“damn right you were being stupid.” he responds with his gruff voice

“huh?”

“i can’t believe you believed that dumb voice in your head.”

“‘suki what are you talking about?”

“i’m saying that you’re actually the most perfect girl in our class and i can’t believe you can’t see that. you definitely did not need to lose weight but if you really wanted to be healthier then there are better methods you could’ve followed instead of just hurting yourself. i think you look absolutely stunning in everything you wear including your hero costume. you’re hands down the hottest student in the hero course, after me of course. you’re the hottest girl in this damn school.”

that second to last line makes you giggle quietly, which he’s so glad to hear 

“but seriously, you’re absolutely perfect in my eyes. don’t change yourself because you want to look like everyone else. you really scared the shit out of me, don’t do it again, please. i will literally hype the fuck out of you every morning until you start to see how you perfect you are. i love you okay?”

you could only smile and nod, “i love you too.”

#tw: eating disorder #tw: anorexia #tw: low self esteem #bakugou katsuki #bakugou #katsuki #katsuki bakugou #bakugou x reader #bakugou imagine #bakugou hcs #bakugou headcanons #mha #bnha #bnha x reader #mha x reader #mha imagine #bnha imagine #katsuki x reader #katsuki imagine #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugou katsuki imagine #mha bakugou #mha bakugou katsuki #bnha bakugou katsuki

[glasyasbutch]

Stella: 13 Roona: 22 Gent: 30

prose boys part one! prose boys part one! under a readmore bc its almost 2k words! thanks for sending them in rebekah i did full scenes for each prompt bc im a whore. bolded are the actual “things they said”.

Stella: Things you said that were important to you (set about six months after her clan’s home in the wood is razed to the ground, and she’s just found herself fully indoctrinated to the nearby city’s criminal ring as an assassin)

Her hands are small, even relative to the rest of her, which as a gnome, is much tinier than most people walking these streets. It's usually an advantage. Makes it all the more simple to just slide her hand into someone's pocket while they were preoccupied at the food cart. Snag a coin while they ordered, snag a hunk of bread while they paid.

She isn't proud of it. She doesn't like having to penny pinch other people's pennies to get by between jobs. But she likes starving to death less, so she swallows her damn pride and got down to it.

The problem is that the figure she’s trying to rob is also a gnome, which means her hands are not nearly as relatively small as she’s used to them being, and she manages to get her thumb caught on the edge of his pocket as she pulls away. His hand is around her wrist before she has a chance to react, grip terrifyingly tight.

"Pardon me, but I don't believe anything in my pockets belongs to - Ester?"

The fake tears she's been trying to push out begin to well up for real, turning her into a breathless, glassy-eyed mess, and she looks into a face she thought she'd never be seeing again. "Gray?"

Gray drops his grip on her wrist, only to clasp her hand between his protectively. "Ester, what are you doing out here doing this?"

She finds her knees start to buckle, and she pushes her weight into Gray's hands a bit to stay standing. "The fire, Gray, I barely made it out, I just ran in the first direction I saw. I ended up here, and when I looked back it was nothing but smoke. I only had my bow with me and I - I thought I was the only one who made it out. I didn't know what to do. I'm just trying to survive in a world I wasn't raised to live in."

Gray's eyebrows furrow, his expression sinks. He reaches his other hand out to grip the side of her face. "There's at least three of us who made it out. I left with Reddy, but he took off from this town a few weeks ago. I was starting to get lonely, but ... then I find you." He smiles, in the crooked sort of way that happens when loss starts to slip through the cracks of joy. "You can do better than this, Es. We're still clan. My house is still your house. Come back with me, at the very least 'til you get on your feet."

"Gray, no, really, I couldn't," she starts, but gets cut off as he begins to tut and takes his hand from her cheek to grip her other hand.

He pushes back her sleeve with his fingers, unintentionally, ever so slightly. He isn't even looking, but it's still enough to make her gasp and stiffen. That, he does notice, and gods damn it, he glances down.

Their clan is from the woods. They don't know a lot of city culture, but the symbol tattooed on her wrist, still slightly red from its freshness, is one of the things they have to recognize. Its something they know damn well to avoid, because these men who take shelter in the woods some nights, with these symbols emblazoned on their wrists and sword scabbards and coin pouches, setting off their hunting traps for fun and leaving their empty booze bottles behind when they go and not putting their fires out properly, are the kind of men who know no rule or law or code, and show no mercy when they feel they've been crossed.

"Ester," he says, voice darkening. "You can do better than this."

She tears her wrist away, tugging her sleeve back down. "My business is my own, Gray."

"As is my home, if you've chosen to turn your back on everything we lived for so quickly."

"I was hungry. I was going to die out here. I don't have many marketable skills, but they saw something worth a paycheck in me."

Gray says nothing, but drops her hands from his with a sharpness that can only indicate disgust.

"You can do better than this," he repeats. Then, for a brief moment, his gaze softens. "I hope you do."

She makes no move to stop him as he turns to go, walking with as big a stride as his gnomish legs can let him, vanishing into the crowded streets. She rubs at her wrist, letting the sting of pressing on the fresh tattoo distract her from the sinking feeling in her gut as one of the last survivors of her clan willingly turns his back on her. She had always figured she had no one left, but now she’s looking right at him and she knows it.

"I'm gonna," she whispers at the space where he has been standing, making up her mind to get back what scraps of her family she still has left. "I'm gonna get out of there, eventually. Swear on the trees."

*****

Roona: Things you said after making a bad decision.

"Vinny Vinny Vinny Vinny Vinny!" Roona pants, running so fast she nearly trips over her feet, "Pouch pouch pouch pouch please please please!"

They tug at the loose piece of leather fixed around their traveling companion's waist, barely waiting for acknowledgement of their presence before scrambling up the leg into the pouch and pulling the flaps closed, trying to look as much like a lute as possible.

Now, most lutes arent quite so lumpy, because they don't have knees to tuck in, and they don't swell and sink because they don't have lungs that are heaving from the mad dash they've just undertaken. But, however much like a lute she doesn't look, Roona supposes the ruse has worked, because no one sticks a sword straight into the flaps and the shrill complaining voice eventually huffs its way out of earshot.

"Is the purple dress lady gone?" she whispers, pulling one very small peep hole open in the mouth of the pouch.

"Yeah," Vinny sighs, still debating whether or not she wants to know what happened this time.

"Okay, good." Roona's head fully emerges from the pouch now, braids more mussed than usual and face still flushed reddish from exertion. They flash a forced smile up at Vinny. "So, don't get mad but. Um."

It seems, whether or not Vinny wants to know, Roona's gonna be telling her anyway.

"You know that really fancy dress shop down the road? I was over there window shopping, you know, like you do. And, well, I went inside, cause they had this really nice yellow thing and this other dress with lilac trim, and I wanted to know how they'd look together? Um?"

Vinny's lips press together, knowing exactly where this story's going.

"So I, uh, I grabbed a pair of shears, and I took a little bit of the trim off the back of the skirt? I mean, it's the back right, no one's gonna see, and it's not like they ever sell the mannequin models anyways, but. For SOME reason, the dress lady didn't like that."

"Roona. C'mon."

She sighs, brushing a few loose hairs out of her face. "No, no. I know. I ... I know. Like, actually. Sometimes people are just stuck up dickheads about their stuff, but like, this one I get. I'll go apologize in the morning, probably. Once she's had the chance to forget where she's left the fabric shears again."

They begin to pull themself out of the pouch, but stop with one leg dangling out over the lip. "On a totally unrelated note. Can I pitch you on a mix and match dress shop?"

*****

Gent: Things you said when you should've been quiet

"Gods," he huffs, flipping over what he's pretty sure is the third page of sigils for what he's significantly less sure is the fifth time. "You really think an archmage with a lifespan like his and absolutely no friends to hang out with would be able to find the time to write a damn key for his notes. Wenceforth! C'mere. Do you know what the fuck these double lines are supposed to be mean?"

The goblin starts at the mention of his name, trotting over on creaky joints from the post he'd be standing by the door. He slips on a pair of glasses, and peers over the piece of paper being held out for him. He spends a good minute tracing a finger across the ink, grumbling and mumbling to himself before turning to face Gent and announcing, very definitely, "No!"

Gent groans and slumps even further in the chair than he has been.

"You've known him forever, Wenceforth, has he always been this illiterate? I mean, god, for all the griping he does at me about penmanship making the difference between a Dancing Light and a Flaming Sphere, you'd think he'd care literally at all about how his own fucking notes look."

"Well, Master Errenis is quite a learned mage, you know, he's really quite skilled, but uh. Between you and me. He's always been a bit more meticulous with his notes since. Well."

Gent immediately shoots up, leaning over the arm of his chair to stare down Wenceforth. "Since what, Wence? You can't just leave me hanging here, man."

"Oh, you know, I don't really want to embarrass him or anything," he mumbles, anxious grin twitching onto his face.

"Oh come on! Please? I'll pay you the rest of my weeks stipend, Wence, I need to know what could've possibly embarrassed Yussah bad enough to change his wizardly ways."

"Oh, all right," he chuckles, leaning in, "but you didn't hear it from me. One time, good few years back, Master Yussah was studyin' this little ball thing, and got himself stuck inside. Had to call in a bunch of his wizard friends to get him back out. And they, ah, barely made it too, I heard, 'cause his map notes were just ... unintelligible."

"You're kidding, Wence? He got stuck. In a ball."

"Sure did, sure did! Had to call that pretty Taldorei lady myself to fix it all up."

"You had to get Arcanist Vysoren to get Yussah out of a ball?" Gent reaches for the goblins shoulders and gives them a good hard squeeze. "Thank you so much for telling me, Wence. You are truly the only man I have ever cared about in my life."

"Come now, surely he's not the only one." someone drawls from the doorway behind Gent.

Gent spins around in the chair, placating grin half way through stretching across his face. "Master Errenis, hello, how are you doing, did you need a hand with something, hope I haven't kept you waiting?"

Yussah gives a wry laugh. "I've been waiting in this doorway long enough, Ms. Avoris. Gossiping about my handwriting won't get those wards copied any faster."

Gent presses his lips together, turning (relatively) apologetically back to his work. Yussah motions for Wenceforth to follow him out of the room, starting to describe some spell components he needed dug out of storage. He stops in the doorway, just to be sure Gent is still in earshot.

"I have got to get that kid to see some other wizards. Let him study with someone really old and crazy, like Waccoh. Then see how he feels about my damn notes."

*****

#bros if you thought This was long get ready morgan sent me one for every single character #stella #roona #gent #asks

[obaewankenope]

Uhm. Have you considered: Crowley keeps shooting himself in the foot with his evil deeds bc he's bad at being evil and the only evil deeds he can come up with are things he can brainstorm a la: '... so what would ruin MY day'

You see, this is where I Really Relate to Crowley because I too always do things that end up fucking me over and not anyone else *looks at hand wrapped up and bruised foot*. When I was like 7 or sth I tried to get my oldest brother to stand on a long ass screw that I’d strategically placed on the stairs but then my mother called for me and I forgot where said screw was and stood on it instead. It was a milimetre from the bone in my foot lmao and they had to literally unscrew it from my foot so like, yeah, Crowley and I are definitely relateable. That said:

[AO3]

.

“Listen, angel, I’ve figured it out!” Crowley says and Aziraphale looks at him with a mild ‘yes dear, that’s great dear’ expression that is not at all out of place on a married spouse dealing with their eccentric partner. It has been a common expression worn by the pair of them over the past six thousand years of their acquaintance, for obvious reasons.

“Figured what out?”

“How to be better at being evil!” Crowley grins widely at Aziraphale who, by this point, is now mildly intrigued and a little bit horrified at Crowley’s thought process. Whatever that process happens to be. 

“I’m oddly curious about this now but also—I do feel a little apprehensive about your… solution, whatever that may be,” Aziraphale says and Crowley gives him a haughty look not unlike a bird that’s just been dunked in a bath because it’s covered in dirt and liked being covered in dirt but is not allowed to be covered in dirt.

“It’s a brilliant solution and you’ll find it’s going to work brilliantly!”

Aziraphale hums. “But my dear Crowley,” he says, “evil always contains the seed of its own destruction.”

Crowley shakes his head, grinning. “Not this time angel,” he replies, tongue flicking out without any real awareness of the action. It captures Aziraphale’s attention—as it always does. “This time there’s no self-destructing happening!”

Aziraphale drops the matter after that but—if he is entirely honest—he is more concerned than ever because Crowley refuses to tell him what the solution is and thus the angel is left to wonder what sort of catastrophe is about to occur because of the demon’s antics. He is, also, a little bit excited to see what the wiley serpent has thought up.

..

Crowley doesn’t show up at the bookshop for a week. Aziraphale tries not to panic about it since—well—they had thwarted the apocalypse, both got downgraded to even lesser underlings than they’d been beforehand and Crowley was sometimes forced to go abroad unexpectedly to perform this or that temptation. It’s fine. Nothing to worry about. Nothing at all.

When one week turns into two, Aziraphale decides to panic. It’s a fruitless sort of panic, more dithering than actually productive, but it’s panic nonetheless and he engages in the very human habit of flapping his hands while pacing in his bookshop and conjuring up all sorts of reasons for why Crowley hasn’t spoken to him.

After week three, Aziraphale goes to the flat and miracles his way inside.

There he finds Crowley, curled up on his bed, asleep. As a bloody snake!

“Crowley!" 

The snake rolls and flops away from Aziraphale, eyes opening comically wide as it lets out a string of hissed curses and promptly falls off the bed as part of its own body serves as a weight for gravity to exert itself upon.

"Crowley what are you playing at?” Aziraphale near shouts, hands waving wildly about him in an expression of honest frustration that is plagued with hurt. “You decide to have a nap and don’t think to tell me! After everything that’s happened? The apocalypse! Heaven! Hell! I know you act impulsively at times, Crowley, but this was thoughtlessly cruel of you!”

Crowley’s head appears over the side of the bed he’s just fallen off, hair askew and eyes wide still. In his human form, Aziraphale notices that the demon looks—for want of a better word—a mess. 

“‘Was the point,” the demon says awkwardly. Crowley clambours to his feet, wobbling a little on one leg as though he’s not quite used to having them anymore. Aziraphale wonders, quite suddenly, if the demon has been a snake for the past three weeks. It seems quite likely. 

“It was the point,” the angel repeats. “The point of not even having the courtesy to leave me a note or call the shop was to be cruel?” Crowley—not looking at Aziraphale—nods. “Why?”

The demon shifts on his feet, hands shoved in pockets too small for such long hands and Aziraphale watches the thumbs work at the material of the jeans a little worriedly. It seems, shockingly, that Crowley is very uncomfortable with this confrontation.

That is unfortunate for Crowley but Aziraphale will have answers.

“Figured that since I always fuck myself over when doing evil, made sense to do something that my life worse at the same time,” the demon mutters, still avoiding Aziraphale’s gaze.

The angel lets out a huff of frustration. “And how did it make your life worse, exactly?” he asks in as measured a tone as he can manage. It’s not very measured but at least he’s trying. “Sleeping for three weeks and comfortable in the knowledge that you at least know where I am doesn’t quite sound as bad as having no idea where the only person you’re friends with is for three weeks, does it now?”

So measured is not within his range of emotional control right now; Crowley always does cause Aziraphale issues with his control. For a variety of reasons. Feeling honestly hurt is a relatively new reason and—if he’s quite honest—not one Aziraphale cares for.

“Sorry angel,” Crowley says, glancing up at Aziraphale and wincing before looking away again. “Won’t happen again.”

Aziraphale must have quite the Unhappy Expression on his usually friendly features for the demon to be acting so contrite.

“You didn’t answer my question, Crowley,” Aziraphale says and he’s determined now to know Crowley’s answer. “How did three weeks of not seeing me make your life worse?”

If Aziraphale was ever asked about it, the angel would forever deny that he had Multiple Reasons for wanting to know the answer to this particular question. He simply wished to understand Crowley’s thinking. That’s all.

Crowley looks at him again but this time the demon maintains eye contact.

“I keep thinking the bookshop is still burning and that you’re- that you-,” the demon says before his voice breaks and he closes his eyes. “I thought that I’d figured out how to do Real Evil by not seeing you, denying myself you, and I did. I did. It’s- angel- I’d rather be doused in holy water.”

“Then why did you not stop your self-flagellation and simply return to the bookshop?” Aziraphale asks, heart pounding at the admission and aching at the pain on Crowley’s face. 

“I couldn’t,” Crowley says, shaking his head. “Couldn’t- I just couldn’t- I didn’t- it hurt too much to think,” he finally gets out, looking down and away, serpentine eyes brighter with tears. “I wanted to just forget the hurt and so I—” he waves a hand at the bed “—slept.”

“Oh, oh you absolute fool darling,” Aziraphale says then and he steps forward. Crowley looks at him in surprise because Aziraphale’s voice is no longer firm and full of hurt anger, now it’s warm and gentle and—yes, Crowley, it is—loving. “Don’t do that again, please?”

Crowley shakes his head. “Never,” he croaks and Aziraphale pulls the demon into an embrace that Crowley doesn’t fight. If anything, the demon sinks into Aziraphale’s touch, head dropping to rest on Aziraphale’s shoulder as Crowley’s arms snake around his chest and keep him close. “Promise.”

“Well then,” Aziraphale says softly. “That’s quite all right then.”

#Anonymous #Kat answers #People talk to me!!! #Good Omens #An Angel and a Demon together #Inefffable Husbands #Crowley #Aziraphale #my writing #kat writes #fic

[akiiwan]

I really need to get out this experience I just had earlier tonight. Thank you for reading & holding space if you are able. ~Not sure how to CW this, still shaking, still feeling like I'm going to throw up.~ First of all, my therapist has told me that I need to practice not isolating myself & talking about the things that cause me hurt &/or trauma instead of pretending they didn't happen, stuffing them away, or trying to run from them. I have been tapering off of a psychiatric med that for me(or my brain) has not been a good experience for about 3 weeks or so. For the last few days I've found myself in crisis that can't even really be explained with life altering symptoms like self harm that I really don't feel like going further into. Not only am I in the middle of switching psychiatrists, but the next appointment I have is over 3 weeks out. The old white dude I was seeing that I transferred from is out of the country apparently & didn't properly tapper me off. When the nurse I spoke with today spoke with the only doctor who was available, they said I was having very severe (but common!!!) withdrawal symptoms from tapering off of this med. Mind you, this is after I've already self-harmed & was trying not to do it again despite feeling that way + dealing with intense suicidal ideation. ANYWAY, 10 minutes before 5pm, when the nurse & doctor are scheduled to leave, she calls me back & says that I need to get to the pharmacy immediately to pick up a 1/2 dosage to keep tapering down & would be sending it in right then. The pharmacy I like to use has limited hours, & also closes at 5pm (would Never have made it). So I reluctantly had them call it into the so-called tumwater walm*rt pharmacy since they would be open until 9pm. we get into the car & the nurse informs me that i need to hang up with her & actually call them to make sure they got it with no issues before they leave for the weekend. I did that & confirmed I was all set to go + also let the pharmacy know I was on my way when I called. Arriving at the pharmacy, driving through the parking lot at walm*rt it's literally a fucking 'maga' convention or some shit. Driving by the main entrance to park there's literally a truck with a sticker of "make america great ag*in" on their back window & an old white couple loading shit into it. I couldn't fuckin take it anymore, as we passed in the car, I rolled the window down & yelled "america was never great & will never fucking be great". Apparently that was enough to start a bunch of shit... We (my husband & I) go park just a little further away than normal bc of the snow & bc it was so busy. I stayed at our car to rant a little bit before going in to try releasing some of the anger & tension that caused, but apparently to no avail as a wmart employee (of course, some old white guy doing carts) watched me the entire time, even as I walked up to the store. Before I even got to the door, I noticed that same employee that had been watching me that I was trying to just walk past gave me the most aggressive & honestly terrifying look. While still walking, not even breaking stride to engage, I shouted at him "fuck all you maga losers" or something to that effect I really cannot remember to be honest. All I know is I know I was on a mission & actually really focused to go get my medication & get the Fuck Out. So while I defended myself from his purposefully intimidating + vicious gaze just by no longer saying silent, he got on his radio & said hell knows what on it. I continued walking fast, straight to the pharmacy with no further words, just trying to get there as fast as my body could carry me. As I walked up to the counter there was a small line with 1 person standing & (of course) a random middle-aged white guy sitting waiting in line 2nd. I politely asked him if he was in line while my husband stood in front of me & offered me to sit while he stood to wait. He confirmed being in line. Directly after, some large old white guy I've never seen (about 6'2" maybe 6'4" or something) got behind my husband. To distract myself from anxiety/everything that just happened, I started talking to him about stuff we did the day before. The old white guy that came up & stood behind my husband stood there for a few seconds, then threateningly walked up to me as I was sitting down waiting & literally interrupted me talking to my husband + said to me "you should clean up your mouth, no one wants to hear that language, you're in public"... "you should go home then if you don't like it, you fucking racist." I said. OF COURSE, of freakin course the middle aged white dude on the other side completely entered himself into this & said "how does this have *anything* to do with race?!" like he had ANY CLUE what was going on. I said one more thing like something to the effect of "yeah I know what this is really about you heard me tell whoever that you maga losers can all fuck off" to both of them - basically he had coincidentally heard what I said to those old white people or some shit idk honestly. IT GETS BETTER - (sarcasm, obviously) The store manager, assistant store manager, & the rest of his entire entourage -literally all white people- ambush us at the pharmacy & say they will not be filling my emergency script & I can leave for ""harassing their customers"". The store manager (some 100% bald middle-aged white dude who no shit literally looked like a fucking skinhead) & whoever the fuck was next to him would not even look at me nor acknowledge me As A Person. They even said right in front of me like I wasn't even there they would only speak with my husband (who also happens to be white). No shit. As my husband tries calmly to explain our/my situation, he cut him off & this dude(store manager apparently) looked at me for one split second with the most disgusted & threatening look even leaning into it, said "what is your name"? "I don't need to give you that information" I replied. He literally turned on his heel & said "fine, I'll just get it from the pharmacy" like that isn't illegal as all hell. My husband, trying to de-escalate & just get my emergency script at this point & save me from more BS told him my deadname right in front of me as the sm stormed off with his entourage. 2 employees remained. The assistant store manager - a white woman who looked confused + shocked? i guess idk I have problems reading people as someone who is neurodivergent. There was also another employee who was also a white woman who had visible tattoos. Long story short, they sit with me while my husband & myself wait once the shit ass of a store manager informed them they would be filling it bc the wmart employee with the tattoos literally confirmed EVERYTHING in my story as she walked by at the time of the old white man approaching me FIRST when I was sitting down in line. After filling my script I walked directly out the door to the EXACT same wmart employee that started all of this. He had already been tipped off not to engage or even look at me (like he did before). So instead as we walked to our car he made sure to exert his "power" over me by walking as close as possible while passing opposite directions on the sidewalk in front of the store. I wish I was making this up. Not even going to try to sugar coat it, I feel scared as hell making this post for So Many reasons. I know I am a light-skinned &/or a "white-passing" POC that does pass either way in certain situations. Being mixed with white, regardless of whether it's winter or summer, I still benefit from this viscous cycle that is white supremacy. I know that & I acknowledge that. So it just makes this post that much more awkward I suppose?, but I know I cannot invalidate my own experiences & I also cannot change how I am perceived as I move through the world. It's definitely different every damn day. So much so that I never really know where I stand or where my presence is welcome or unwelcome or what to even expect from people.

TL:DR; My friends of color in this area or passing through: stay the fuck away from the tumwater walm*rt literally at all fucking costs. it's 100% unsafe.

Thankful as all hell for the community I've chosen to surround myself with & that we've moved into an area that seems a lot safer & with a lot more POC community to connect with + continually feel safe around to help manage my C-PTSD.

[impivus]

very rushed very shit intro comin @ you all but here goes nothing ! i’m felix from the gmt tmz, i use he / him pronouns, and im gonna power nap any minute now because one thing you should know about me is that i’m eternally on the verge of passing out from minimum exertions during the day. this is my pain in the ass eunsu: not even going to sugar coat it - he’s the human personification of a headache dumpster fire all in one beefy package and i really don’t even blame your character if they just . ignore his presence because, me too !

under the cut there’s some information about him if you want to get to know more about him regardless. smash that mf heart if you want to plot.. and i will get to you ? sometime ? its an ambiguous promise but i keep them, discord is also an option so just ask if you’d prefer to plot on there. eun’s about is here but no plots as of yet because life is hard and We Cant all Have Everything 

aka im lazy 

* ☾ ✧ * º ━━ is that KIM JONGIN walking about ? nope ! that’s just EUN SU CHO. & i’ve been told that they work as a INFORMATION BROKER ! apparently, they are TWENTY FIVE ( 204 )  years old .  some people say they are a CISMALE, DEMON ! HE is very CULTIVATED & INTUATIVE but also DECIETFUL &  MENACING. i wonder if they are just as odd as the rest of us .  ⇢  SYNOPSIS. MBTI TYPE  /  entp, the debater ZODIAC SIGN  /  scorpio   ENNEAGRAM TYPE  /  7w8 KINSEY SCALE  /  3 MORAL ALIGNMENT /  chaotic evil / neutral HOGWARTS HOUSE / slytherin ⇢ AESTHETICS. 

goosebumps raised and feelings of growing dread, the dark corner of a room where light doesn’t reach, silver pocket - watches with dead batteries, the scratch of a record player needle, flares in the sky, bad ideas coming to life, half-assed clapping when it’s required, figures dancing within the shadows & a smile you shouldn’t trust . 

⇢ OVERVIEW

literally anybody: when are you free?  eun su: im forever imprisoned in my own personal hell so i am never truly "free" but i don't really have plans all next week except for monday

this is eun su, and will y’all believe me if i say he used to be a good egg before he turned into the rotten egg i’m presentin y’all with today ??  i kid u not.. bs free zone. he did once ..  have a hort  he was born to a cult of witches, his twin brother absorbing all the magic that was meant to be equally distributed between them in his mother’s womb, which pretty much left eunsu as the black sheep of the family. said cult had been living on a small, near enough desolated island for literal decades, entertaining themselves with magic, seeking out knowledge, observing the unassuming populace, and toying with other supernatural creatures who dared cross their paths. unfortunately for eunsu’s family, tragedy struck when one of his aunt’s tried to over throw the high priestess ( his mother ) in their coven. unyielding in her position and untouchable to the magic she was exposed to, her sister went about other ways to break the woman’s spirits, dabbling in black magic predominantly to achieve her goals. eunsu’s brother was, thus, cursed before he was even born with an incurable heart defect that would see him dead before he reached double figures. eunsu’s mother was broken not mourned over how much he missed out as on a child: but she mourned for the fact that he was the only child that harboured any magic in their veins, the only child that could’ve carried on their lineage.   queue entrance of eunsu and his Whats the Worst that Could Happen Attitude. being young and naive, thought he could’ve been able to solve it by himself, solve the issues and earn his mother’s lacking affections. eun had heard about dark vessels that could miraculously grant wishes through summonings. though he didn’t have magic in his veins he had a fire in his heart, and after all, demons cared not for who or what they fed from: so long as they appeased their hunger.  all it wanted in return was a good, pure soul, and that’s what the demon stole from him before it mended his twin brother’s heart, giving the boy a new lease of life that wasn’t intended for him from the start. pity that eunsu died before he got to the age of twenty, following a quick and hungry fever that overtook his frail body and too soon turned deadly. there was no surprise that, come judgement day, he was turned away at the gates of heaven, in exchange for becoming one of lucifer’s own.

as a result of being eternally cursed with immorality and a tainted soul, he's lived some hundred-odd years and is coping by making the current populace in jeonseoul suffer along with finding purpose in digging out the secrets of his past life, mayhaps trying to find the demon who cursed him.... which could definitely be a wc.. and strengthening his abilities as a demon.

his personality is a bit insufferable; eunsu keeps himself distant and cryptic, because he likes it that way. he's a real weirdo ( if u have ever watched hxh he’s hisoka.. THAT weird )  that's hard to forget: completely mischievous, dramatic, and malicious to boot. some days he's waxing poetic about the futility of having a sense of justice and the next he's using his demonic powers to make some innocent tourist think they're hallucinating as they attempt to walk into a steady flow of traffic. 

ultimately life's a game to him and bih.. he’s here to have fun ! he's outlived his actual family and friends ( well, aside from his brother who he barely remembers, prolly be a wc if anyone’s interested ) and he's not looking to get attached to anyone. it would be great to Die because it’s his forever Mood but he also gets furious if anyone tries to actually expel him for real - so he'll simply prod at the world and its people until he gets the reactions he wants.

fair warning: it is a pain to genuinely care about eunsu and not many people will wanna do it. he comes and goes into people's lives as he pleases, stops reaching out once he's bored and only ever grazes the surface of a relationship based on its worth or his curiosities, innocent ppl, cute ppl, etc are just gonna be eaten up by him then dropped. 

the people who will be closest to him are doubtlessly other demons ig ? but he also hates y’all too so.. don’t get too friendly like he’s not here to make friends he’s here to be Jeonseoul’s next top Demon. also since he died sumn like 200 years ago it’s possible some wizards / familiars knew of him and his coven, it’d be super interesting for someone to have known cute human eunsu in exchange for chaotic bastard demon eunsu 

⇢ MISCELLANEOUS

since he’s a young demon, his horns are small and his wings barely span about two inches above his shoulder bones, he got itty bitty bat wings lbr he’s kinda pissed abt it. there’s tattoos over his scars from clashing with other demons / hunters / angels, but his devil’s mark lining the back of his neck, performed by first demon who took his soul, has never faded away. 

he also works as an info broker, which ties in with the fact that he’s a contractual demon ! it's more of a hobby than a job, something he does for kicks and to restock his gambling money and alcohol money, but he offers a helping hand to solo clientele for private cases if need be, just remember to bring your negotiation skills because his manipulation skills are a1.

he's well-versed in witchcraft even if he can’t actually possess the abilities that actual witches can. while hardly the mentoring type, he could be convinced to equip people with his knowledge of latin, spells or dark magic they want if he's interested enough. then again he might decide to screw them over for kicks so ask him for favours with caution.

for someone who carries a ton of spite and secrets, he passes as an easygoing, casual literature major on the daily to disguise his true intentions. find him at the university pretending to be a student and failing miserably at it like edward’s thousand year old ass in twilight

he cheats at the casino with his demonic powers but does it infrequently enough to pass it as luck. play games with him at your own risk. casinos are one of his favourite places but he can really be found anywhere with ease but some other places he frequents are: beaches, libraries, museums, bars, etc !

he'll get on people's nerves, but getting him to care to the degree of hate is another story. living this long has numbed him; people don't surprise him anymore and he doesn't care to spend time thinking about others. the secret to getting him to turn deathly serious is as simple as telling him you can tell that he was once a good person - because the cheesy truth is he was. he just convinces himself that he's given up trying to remember his human life and finds it easier to live like he’s dead.. yknow which he is.

romance makes him queasy, he's a spiteful old bastard and the concept of sweet love rubs him 100% fictional. there's someone he fancied before he was cursed but i'll save you the story: that's a distant dream now.

he might quote romantic works or put some pretty words together but he's fake as Fuck. if he notices someone innocent and unsuspecting crushing on him they are in so much trouble. he'll kiss their hand then twirl them right off a cliff. corruption kink central right here laid ease

as of rn he’s trying to master how to teleport and shadow control but he really is like on level one and he’s got to get up to level 50 to achieve even a fifth of what these other demons can do 

edit: i totally forgot to include eunsu’s ‘demonic’ title after he was banished to the perils of hell. it’s ironically just saint, and he goes around using that bc it’s blasphemous and a big ole middle finger to god himself. nobody will know his real name, but if there’s an off chance that they do, that’s a massive threat to eunsu and he’ll get his Snipers on Scene

tl;dr: 

#oddintro #. I HAVE THE POWER OF GOD AND ANIME ON MY SIDE ── / OOC. ❞ #so this is. a thing!

[dreamweavers]

aaand now for the negatives. I posted my reactions live on twitter but now that I've played around with them for a little over an hour I can put my feelings more concisely here.

LOL surprise don't have the best quality which is why I usually prefer to get them secondhand but man. this pack sold for over $50 and the quality is just bad. I mean I did get a great deal getting all of this, along with a Pikmi pop plush and a hatchimals pixie for 7 bucks, but that doesn't mean I can't be absolutely flabbergasted they sold this LOL surprise pack for over 50 bucks in stores with that quality.

the wig caps are cut horribly. not warped from storage, they're cut wrong and you can tell when a doll wears them. they might be cut funny so the cat can wear them, but still, it's hard to judge how to put them on the dolls. the ones without bangs are more noticeably cut weird, the ones with bangs look pretty much fine.

while the rubber wigs feel more like an afterthought while the real focus is the more realistic hair, almost none of them fit the dolls heads properly. haven't tried them on the cat but even if they fit the cat, the LOL dolls themselves are the main focus so they should fit them. it's also easy to accidentally rip them, and they're an absolute magnet for glitter.

the doll with blue eyes has stiff legs that don't feel like they want to move at all in the slightest, but after a bit of force I was able to finally move them. when I was putting boots on the doll with brown eyes I literally had to use all my strength. I seriously thought they wouldn't go on. they fit now but I don't even wanna try getting them off, so it's a good thing that outfit looks cute on her bc it's gonna stay on.

and the shorts in the third pic? I literally can't get them higher than that. I was able to force those boots on the other doll but I literally couldn't get those shorts up higher and don't really like the outfit enough to sit there exerting all my force on it. I'm not the strongest person ever, but I'm stronger than a kid, and for a kid's toy whose main gimmick is swapping the multiple outfits that they came with, you'd think it'd be easier.

and this happens with most glittery toys, but man does the glitter get everywhere. changing the wigs or outfits of these dolls is bound to shed glitter all over the place.

so for TL;DR: not the best quality toys, perfectly fine for $7 (which is less than 1 LOL doll goes for new in stores) but it bothers me thinking that someone once paid over $50 for these bc the quality is definitely not worth it.

#cherry blabs #my toys #long post

[makeroomforthejolyghost]

anyway here are some Recent Highlights of. bein sicksad

all food tastes bad; too depressed to find out whether this is because anhedonia or hyponatremia. instead, 3 daily “meals’” worth of hanging over a bowl of cereal or costco lentils or mac and fake cheese, adding salt, crying at injustice of universe, scolding self for tears’ counterproductivity. once a day inevitably tells self everything would be fine if you could get enough food--enough protein and b12 and salt!!!! it would make you euphoric!; instead halfway thru meal thinks of half-remembered advice not to use saltwater to induce vomiting because it can kill you? cue panic about consuming this much salt and water so quickly. half an hour later, “oh--i do feel slightly better.”

depression showers wonderfully convenient way to show me how much i hate me w/out it looking too much like self-harm!!!

somehow past me did not foresee that the next time she got depressed she would use her (then manically gleeful) “pain is arbitrary and not inherently unpleasant!!!” peptalk against herself. this comes in 3 flavors apparently?--

first came “of course you’re ill, but does that matter?”--which needless to say leads straight to “does ANYTHING matter?!” &c. &c.;

then hating myself for still caring--or maybe just wanting to care, in order to fill up the otherwise-empty space in my brain? when the options are pity yourself or ruminate on your own existential uselessness you’d so much rather have the self-pity, but causes for this disappear when u look right at them. 

plus for a while i was genuinely Doing Better, bc only one class. but then spring break and also a lot of self-hatred re Not Doing Enough happened, so:

finally, the latest edition, viz., “not sure if good day or inability to take fleshcase grievances seriously thru haze of self-hatred.” which is almost fascinating?? bc even tho i know intellectually/from experience that for me depression causes a substantial drop in both self-respect and bodily awareness i... somehow did not expect that the latter would still be true when the direct cause of your depression is illness.

ALL OF WHICH RESULTS in the exquisite combination “existentially horrified by idea of future w/ chronic illness; meanwhile berates self for not being sick enough to deserve this reason for depression.” i don’t know what i expected.

...except actually i do?? i expected horror about being reproach incarnate; i expected to feel bitter about having to hide this crap from other people; as soon as i thought about the concept “depressed about being sick” i would know also to expect self-reproach of the “but that’s arbitrary, because if you could [insert six impossible things] then that wouldn’t happen. you’re just LAZY!” variety. but even after six years’ experience of how being depressed works, and two how being sick works, i still mostly pictured crying in bed about not being able to do xyz anymore. and all of this is part of it?? bbbut. mostly,

it’s about despising yourself for having lost your second-oldest friend to this calamity (even after he stuck around thru like six prior ones), because you try to get righteously angry about how awkward your debility made him but you see right thru your act and know* it’s only awkward if you make it awkward;

it’s about regretting every genuinely good day since for months afterward you use its example to punish yourself for so rarely being that happy and functional;

it’s about forgetting six thousand times over the precept you already worked out about the definition of “can’t,” and not knowing if it’s a self-protective rationalization or not that you suspect your self-contempt re the distance between “literal can’t” and “why bother trying when you’re too sick to do it right” is a sinecure-anxiety for how much you want it not to be true that you “can’t.” instead you tell yourself you do want that to be true (you hideous fiend!), and therefore won’t let yourself have it. so you force yourself not to sit down at any point while making lunch, and hope to god this’ll keep you strapped to the bed tomorrow rather than either making you the bad kind of manic or conditioning you to handle such exertions more often in the future, thus robbing you of another excuse to wallow in debility (or filth or something);

it’s about wishing you hadn’t had a headache every day for untold weeks, not because you deplore the sensation itself but because you’re tired of despising yourself for deigning to notice such a quintessentially small complaint. if it had been anything else you’d find it easier to respect your frustration, you tell yourself--and then you remember how disgusted you get with yourself when you’re constipated.

*or maybe “know”??? depression’s so much about fevered clarity but some of that is fake so who “knows” anything anymore Ha Ha I’m So Funny “oh god all jokes are just empty rhetoric you can rationalize in any direction you want and the only practicable reason to do something is because you want to BUT I WANT NOTHING ‘when you cease to believe in something you don’t believe in nothing you believe in anything’ the lukewarm envy all other fates GOD WHY ARE YOU SO PRETENTIOUS can’t you just say ‘nothing means anything’???” &c. &c. &c.

#screalth tag #existential fart chart #food /// #emetophobia warning /// #self-harm mention ///