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aller-geez · 1 year

Text

Bless You

By Levi’s Owner, not sure if she wants her name here ☺️

Please note! She doesn’t have the kink, but dabbles in a LOT of kink spaces that she doesn’t have, and she knows how much I love RemixLevi and wrote this amazing OneShot with permission to share 🥰 it got me GOING I cannot lie. A little sub/dom relationship, snz teasing, public sex in a bathroom, and definitely NSFW 18+ content.

BLESS her heart, she searched the internet for snz spellings too 🥹🥹

please enjoy~

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The Thomas bus door swung open and inside climbed in a tall, overtly excited man who bounced the entire house as he danced and jumped about. "Babe!!" he cried out looking for his smaller counterpart, emerald orbs scanning quickly around the small space but not immediately seeing the love of his life.

"Im in here," Remi heard a soft muffled voice coming from inside the pile of stuffies on their bed, followed by the soft ambient music of a video game he knew too well, minecraft. The wolf smirked at the pile shaking his head and rolling his emerald green eyes.

"Enrichment time in your enclosure?" he asked casually before the leopard's mop of white and black hairs came popping out through the middle, cheesin.

"How could you guess?" he giggled sliding out of his stuffie cave, putting his game on pause and setting it aside. "Whats up? You look like someone set fireworks off in your pants," he teased, poking his index fingers up and down the man's fairly chiseled, but clothed, abs. Remi swatted at his partner's hands and laughed through his nose.

"Baaaaabe," he rolled his eyes and then grasped both of his lover's wrists in his hands, gently, but it only gave Levi an even more squirrely case of the zoomies.

"Ooo you gonna make me??" he giggled again, tugging and pulling on his hands as the wolf's grip tightened, he sneered at him with lust behind his eyes before pushing their foreheads together gently.

"Why would I reward such bratty behavior? Be still and let me share this good news, maybe Kitten will get some play," he brushed their lips just barely together, a whisper of what a kiss really was, his fiance's face turning bright red, eyes sinking and he nodded ever so slightly with a gentle swallow. "Good boy," Remi patted the side of Levi's face with a light slap, a bit harder than one normally would their partner, but the cat loved abuse. Tingles shot down the leopard's spine as he wiggled to attention.

Standing up straight this time now, fixing his beat up leather jacket and lifting his head held high, Remi spoke "WE, you and me, have a big opportunity tonight, we have dinner with this dude from Wallstreet, he can get me an in and even though I know nothing, and have zero experience he's willing to teach me everything so we can be rolling in the money!" absolutely excited for the chance to be able to pay back tenfold what Levi has done for him the past 5 years, was euphoric, but he immediately sunk in himself when he saw the look on his mate's face. "What's wrong?" he asked cautiously, almost timid. Levi looked down at his hands and twiddled his thumbs, he wasn't sure he had the right words.

He loved Remi, more than words could ever describe, they were soulmates and he hated the idea of him throwing his soul away to work in corporate, worse yet, WALLSTREET. "Honey....wallstreet is where dreams die and lives are ruined at the expense of paper," his artic colored eyes looked up now at Remi's completely crushed face.

"You're not...proud? or ...excited?" Immediately feeling like a pile of the 'worst fiance' ever quickly, the cat threw his hands out in waves.

"No baby, I AM proud of you, and Im so excited that people are willing to see your potential, and that theyre giving you such opportunities to be successful but, this isn't your dream, my love, and I just don't want you to fall back in your progress because you think you HAVE to make millions of dollars to take care of us," he had stood up to face Remi, well, face his chest he was still significantly smaller. Sliding his hands up and down the nervous man's front in a soothing motion to calm him back down, making eye contact again, "I apologize, my love, you know how I can be, I should have had a better pros and cons talk with you after the dinner, I should have just been excited for you," instantly feeling bad for his realism that often rained on Remi's parade.

Leaning down to kiss him in a soft peck, Remi brushed his hand against the younger's cheek and gave him a reassuring smile. "I know you're just thinking about my mental health, I'll always be grateful for that because no one else ever has," their eyes met and they regrouped their emotions by sliding themselves into a deep but disciplined kiss. Before things got handsy, Remi pulled back and bopped the tip of Levi's nose with his long index finger. "Get ready, we can talk more after the dinner and consider the options," nodding his head in agreement, the skinny white haired male lept up and got into action. Remington wants to have a nice fancy dinner with a rich fancy wallstreet man? Fine. No problem. He will just have to create a little "devine intervention" tonight. The two of them immediately started scrounging and scouring to get ready for this opportunity they both had been suddenly blessed with; different motives, but opportunities none the less.

Remington had hopped himself in the shower, Levi had already cleaned himself this morning so he was ready to throw on his clothes, but which would he pick? If he was going to cause some ruckus he was going to need to pull up to all the stops. Out he snaked a pair of leather black tight pants, adorned in black rose lace down the sides of the legs "He looooves these on me," giggling in almost a demonic fashion, he slid whatever he was wearing off, and pulled on the pants, no underwear, cause that would absolutely ruin the aesthetic of exposed lacey flesh on the sides. Levi stood shirtless as he could hear Remi fumbling in the shower with the many bottles of product. Trying hard not to laugh to himself knowing the wolf was probably overly rushing himself, causing panicked chaos in the shower. He was right. The grumpier of the two was absolutely having a terrible time in there.

"ITS SO FUCKING SMALL IN HERE!" the leopard covered his mouth quickly to stifle the laughter threatening to explode from him as his lover shouted from their bathroom. Shaking his head now he went back to his mission of top, and accessories. Plucking it gently from his closet was a light blue silk shirt "Amazing," he kissed the air before sliding that onto his thin frame, looking himself up and down in the long mirror attached to the wall. "Hmmm," he contemplated as he looked himself all around, then tucking his shirt loosely into the pants, and unbuttoned 3 of the buttons to reveal a bit of chest flesh. "Thatll do him," sliding on some black loafers that had the image of a blue iris embroidered on the tops, he began scanning through his jewelry. Remington stepped out, towel over his head as he tried his best to dry out his hair, walking past Levi to the otherside of the bedroom cabin was his side. "Clothes....Clothes...." he started tearing into his closet nervously.

Looking back at his partner from the mirror while adjusting his one diamond earring in, "Honey, wear the beige trench coat with some black, you'll look perfect," the mate said honestly. Remi looked up in his cabinets and considered the suggestion, he pulled out his black straight leg dress pants, they just neatly clug to his legs in all the right places.

Back on the other side of the cabin, while Remi fished for his dress shirt, Levi was linking around his slender neck a sparkling, thin diamond chain and in the middle that sat against his freckled, exposed chest was a wolf's paw print, melded in sterling silver. Last but not least, a silver chain he link around his waist, a long piece connected that draped down his hip. Twirling around and admiring himself in the reflection, he fixed up his hair with some gel, and made his way out of the bedroom so Remi could have the mirror now. Still not paying full attention to what his partner was wearing or even doing, he scampered over to the mirror fixing any mistakes there may be. He had gone with a tucked in black long sleeve button up, shiny black tied dress shoes and ontop of it all was a very expensive looking, light brown long coat that toned in all the black he was wearing. Flicking the lapels of his jacket a few times and running his fingers through his hair, he made finger guns and clicked at his reflection. "Lookin good brother," he offhandedly said to himself before exiting the bedroom.

Bent up against the front door, keys dangling from the tip of his finger he licked his teeth, canines more specifically, he had dazzled in gems. Remi stopped in his tracks, gazing vertically at his mate, feeling a wave of possessiveness boil through him. "No," he said immediately. "You can't wear that, it'll have me in heat all god damn night, No!" his face flushed as he tried to keep his eyes off, but could only keep them locked on.

"Remington, You know far too well this isn't a fight you'll win so grab the keys to Ethel and lets get going," he stuck his tongue out over at his man, who in turn rolled his eyes, squeezed the bridge of his nose and sighed in frustration.

"Its going to be a rough night for me I can tell," swiping the hunk of keys off the counter, Levi snorted.

"You never know~" his tone said, innocent, like 'oh trust the universe itll bring good things' but it had been far too long with his mate to know from that very instant, the man was up to no good, and Remi was already quaking in his shoes. They followed each other out, locked up Maybelle and got going in Ethel, which Remi had pretty much turned into his studio room with added storage space for his things. They were working up a way to create space for a bed somehow, for nights he has to be away from Levi for whatever reasons.

It wasnt a very long drive from the park they were currently staying at, out to the city, and eventually, restaurant. However, they did get very, very crusty side ways looks from the rich folks watching Remi drive into the lot with his van. "Bunch of prudes," Levi scoffed as he folded his arms against his chest. He hated rich white people, always so concerned with what everyone else has going on. Remi chuckled at his comment, he didn't give a shit. Look at him whichever way, however way you please, as far as he's concerned, with Levi by his side, his sister safe and the world back to being enjoyable, inbred rich people opinions couldnt touch him.

Parking the vehicle, both men got out of the van and walked up to the podium that said Reservations. "Remington for 3," the towering raven haired man said firmly, eyeing the employee down. Giggling softly, Levi grabbed onto Remi's hand and leaned himself against his partner's side, eyes judging the sweating employee infront of them. Clearly this establishment wasnt used to people like them whether that be gay, or just not visibly rich.

"Right this way gentlemen..." the usher said carrying them to a table with a much older, clean cut looking sir already seated, and scanning through the menu with a bottle of merlot sitting beside his half full glass. "Here is your table, please enjoy," the waiter bowed and left two more menus behind for them. Like the true knight in shining armor he was, Remington pulled one of the chairs out slightly for his fiance to sit at, Levi taking the gesture and letting his man push him in as well. "Good to meet you, I'm Remington, hope you don't mind me seating my partner first," extending a strong calloused hand out to the business man who smiled brightly and shook it enthusiastically. "No problem, at all, Good to meet ya! I'm Bill," he introduced himself cheerfully as they all were now seating themselves comfortably and glancing around the table. "This is my fiance, soulmate and partner in crime, Levi Anderson," the leopard extended a hand across the table as to shake Bill's already waiting hand.

"Pleasure," the shortest of the three said charmingly. The men began to discuss things as men do, but it was Levi's biggest shot now. Guards were down, ideas were flowing, plans were being made, if he didn't act fast, his lover was going to get smooth talked straight into hell through the promise of money and good benefits. The waiter came by silently, dropping off a charcuterie board for the table and leaving, Levi spotted his opportunity. As Remi continued to talk business with this plain old man, Levi was coveting some of the crackers to hide the fact he was also grabbing the pepper shaker. Looking around him to make sure he wasnt going to get caught doing such a childish thing in such a fancy establishment, but he dumped some on his cracker and brought it to his lips, without being noticed he silently, and secretly, snorted it up his nose. The second he did, it forced its way out from him like a volcanic eruption, no time to prepare, only react.

"HET-CHU!!~" He sniffled his nose, before another wave hit him. "cHU!~"

*Thadump* a sound Levi knew, so very intimately. Remi's heart beating loudly.

'No....No he wouldnt...' Remi flushed trying to swallow the sexual anguish he felt after hearing his partner break into sneeze, shifting ever so slightly in his seat to remain calm, to keep himself in check.

"Are you alright over there?" Bill asked concerned with the sudden series of sniffles, sliding an inch away, cautious of a virus.

"Oh..yes, I just have really bad allergies," he said sheepishly tucking a piece of loose hair behind his ear, his voice inflected to sound more stuffed up than he usually would be after two sneezes. The older man nodded turning back to Remi, who dead eyed his mate that only returned his gaze with a sly wink.

'That sadistic little shit....oh he's going to get it whe-' staring blankly at the man who was prattling on in front of him before his thought was shattered by the sound of yet another sneeze. 'Keep it together Rem...' his groin twitched.

"eh-TSH-eh!" Levi snuffled and rubbed his nose into the napkin in small circles, pulling it away, a bead of sweat started to slip down the side of Remi's face. Bill not noticing a single thing wrong as he boasted about his career and accomplishments, all the things he could do for Remi. All Remi could concentrate on was all he could do to Levi in this very moment. Would he go to jail if he just ravaged him here?

"TSHOO!" Levi tried to hold that one in halfway to give it a more dramatic effect. He knew it was sending waves of electricity down the wolf's spine, he wiggled in his seat. His baby blues blinking gently in the direction of his tortured lover.

"Hey, Remi arent you going to offer your fiance a hand or something?" Bill looking over between the two of them, Remi's soul completely out of his body due to the position he was currently in.

"I- Uh, yes I uhm....honey?" He held out his bare hand to Levi, brain completely not registering what he was even offering, Bill cocked an eyebrow, even the leopard looked slightly confused, but taking it anyway and then letting out another one, gentlier this time, nothing crazy flying out, just hot ridged breath in between his long shaking fingers. "ESHUH~" it came out almost high pitched in sound, too cute to the wolf's ears, his cock started to pump full of blood. The sensation of feeling such a gentle action, the sound, the absolute publicness of this display, it was so entirely naughty. They both clearly knew between the two of them, what was really going on. While Bill laughed out loudly and threw himself back with his hands on his stomach.

"I LIKE him! Funny guy you have yourself promised to here," he slapped Remi on the side of the arm who tensed up and snapped his gaze back to reality.

"Oh I- uh...Yeah, he sure is something isnt he?" joking along nervously, the dark haired man was lucky that this old rich idiot was far too concerned with his ego to notice how absolutely rock solid and flustered he was. Slamming his fist on the table he coughed "We should order right? Food? That would be good..." He muttered scanning the menu lazily trying with every last inch of his soul to distract himself.

"Oh yes I'd love a clam cho-OWCHUH!" the white haired adonis male was interupted again by yet another violent sternutate. "Terribly sorry, don't mind me I'll just have to excuse myself to the....restroom, I'd like a clam chowder bread bowl," ordering as he stood up, glared at his partner to follow him, and continued his journey to the back bathrooms. While Bill's attention was on Levi to remember the order, Remi quickly snagged the pepper shaker, shoveling it into his pocket before he too stood up. "Yeah, I gotta piss, steak, rare, thanks, I'll be right back, so sorry," he excused himself as Bill waved him off without a care in the world, or concern on his plate.

The second, the absolute milisecond Remi pushes past the doors of the restroom and locates his partner's shoes in the correct stall, he practically peels the door off its hinges. "You think you're clever dont you??" He shouts in a whispered fashion incase anyone comes in.

"What do you mean, my lover?" playing it completely innocent in high brat fashion, cornering himself against the wall of the handicapped stall. The wolf loomed closer, each step of his shoe echoed within the chambers of the bathroom itself. Diamond eyes traced every move up the masculine man's body, stopping at the slightly enraged, but completely passion stricken facial expression.

"Oh? Oh we want to act like I'm stupid?" Raising a thin black eyebrow as he walked himself an inch away from Levi's face, "You've been playing with fire all night, my naughty little kitten, and now you're going to be punished, severely," He gripped Levi by a fist full of hair, knuckles white, Levi's eyes forced open by the pressure, mouth cocked.

"Hng~" The leopard whimpered softly, legs buckling underneath the sheer dominance of his mate. "D-daddy please I didnt mean to upset you..." his lips quivered but it was too late, the black haired man ran his tongue up the smaller's thin, etched neck, nipping at the line of his jaw. A whisper of a moan came bursting from out of Levi's vocals, like music to Remi's ears, but that wasn't what he wanted to hear tonight in this bathroom with amazing acoustics. While Levi's head is pulled back he takes the shaker in his other hand and swiftly brings it up to the man's nostirls. "NNnNGh~ AHHH~~~ EHhHhHhCHTUUU~!" Levi sneezes loudly, aggressively, suddenly into the side of Remi's face, echoing inside his ear drum, unhinged, uninterupted, bouncing off the walls and giving him a second helping.

"Mmm you wanted to entertain, so you're going to entertain me.....unleash it," he referenced, grinding his painfully erect dick up against the younger through the painful fabric of his pants. Wasting no time while head cocked in position backward, he still expertly found his way to his partner's belt unclinking it. "Give Daddy another, come on, be good for him now," He said gripping tighter against Levi's thick hair, between the pepper, the position of his face against the ceiling lighting, he didnt stand a single chance.

"etSHU! ET-SHU! EHTSHU-EH!" it came out in a series, as they spilled into the air around them, Remi forced the afflicted one just under his ear at the crook of his neck by the nap of his hair, instead of pulled backward, he wanted to intake every last reverberation through his core. Levi's hand fumbled its way past his waist band, through every inch of fabric to touch hot, throbbing flesh in his palm.

"Oo-fu-fuck," Remi hissed beside Levi's ear, the leopard's own pants feeling relatively too tight, but as in true punishment fashion, knew he was not the focus of this particular event. He was in big, big trouble. "Now, now, don't be shy," whispering in a sultry dark tone. "Don't stop," huffing faster now as Levi slid the pad of his thumb through the wolf's tip. "Hnngg..." strained now as he forced the shaker back over into Levi's nostrils.

"EH-TSHU!" this one rocked his body forward, eyes watering and tears starting to streak down his face, the tip of his nose cherry red, and his hand stuttering in his strokes as they got faster but sloppier. "Please.....TsHO...."Another, smaller sneeze. Emerald orbs disappeared through the back of Remi's skull as the hand on his cock twitched under Levi's skilled but nonmetrical fingers that worked to squeeze and pump him.

"Little more, kitten," he gasped low, guttural, deep from within his throat, Levi's own eyes rolled back from heated pleasure. They were rutting and rubbing up against each other in an animalistic, heated fashion, complete desperation for the both of them in this moment, who knows or cares if Bill was even still out there waiting. They were lost in this moment. The cat glanced to the side up at the light shining from the ceiling and it triggered one last...

"ACHOOO~" Levi's hand clasped tightly around his lover's leaking member, between the pressure of that and the sound of his mate's last big sneeze, he came, hard into's Levi's hand and down his shiny black leather pants, which would be a crime if Levi had the concentration to care. As he was still absolutely wasted off lust from being completely used in this fancy restroom. Remi, coming down from the high of his orgasm slumped lazily against the wall and his partner, catching his breath and trying to find the capacity to have logical thought once again.

Both of the men took a minute to cool off, to breathe. However, once Remi was recouped he had Levi tugging at his coat. "You're just going to use me, mess me up and leave me like this?" whining gently followed by a pouty lip as he pointed down to his own throbbing issue, and the spooge on his pants.

"Oh...Baby," Remi pouted back in a gentle tone that immediately changed into a devilish grin. "Yes I am," sticking his tongue out like the evil revenge master he was. "That'll teach you to rile me up like that in PUBLIC during important meetings,"

"I-...Bu--t....I-...Yo-..." He stuttered standing there flabbergasted as he fluttered back and forth.

"Bless you," he kissed the dumbfounded man on the sweaty forehead, before fixing his pants, buckle, and stepping out confidently. Leaving his partner behind to clean himself up and to maybe reconsider messing with a wolf.

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vlion · 2 years

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one with y/n x yelena, theyve been dating for a few years and y/n wants to have a baby but obviously theyre both females. you can decide on the rest

The Bathroom Countertop (Yelena Belova/Female Reader)

Author's Note: Thank you for this request-I hope you don't mind I turned it into a bit of a hurt/comfort situation. I had a lot of fun (and feels) writing this one, and I hope you enjoy!

Link to AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/39182628

Content Warnings/General Themes: fluff, hurt/comfort, the slightest hint of angst, AFAB! female-identifying reader, me as a Polish-American author trying to include some Russian (I tried my best lol), references to childhood trauma/adoption (in relation to Yelena, not reader), descriptions of injuries/blood, some brief mentions of pregnancy and IVF (in vitro fertilization).

Rating: All Audiences

Word Count: 1,820

“Babe…” your girlfriend whined, drawing out each syllable to what felt like the greatest extent, exaggerated even further by her distinct accent. You were currently standing between her legs while she sat on the bathroom countertop, writhing each time you even began to move your arm to clean her injuries. She had called you in a panic, muttering something about a ‘hit gone wrong,’ and you soon found yourself letting your very tired-looking girlfriend into your shared apartment in the middle of the night, having been startled awake by her call only minutes earlier.

“Yelena, what did I tell you about taking on these jobs? I don’t mind the more tame stuff…hacking, spying, or hell, even some smuggling here or there, but the ‘assassin’ stuff? I thought you were done with this?” You said, having endured enough of these nights spent patching her up. You wouldn’t say it to her face, but seeing her like this never failed to remind you how fragile the relationship the two of you shared truly was. To think that any of these days she could leave and never come back–it was definitely getting to you more than you would ever admit.

A frustrated sigh from Yelena pulled you out of your thoughts. You reached up and tucked some of the hair that had fallen out of her braid behind her ear, her eyes searching for yours while you allowed your hand to brush over the tender flesh of her neck that currently housed what looked like a knife wound. It didn’t seem like she was stabbed or that the blade penetrated too far into her skin, thankfully, but it was deep enough to cause a significant amount of bleeding. She closed her eyes slightly, and you’ve been with her long enough to know she was trying not to wince from the pain that even a slight touch to the wound caused.

“I’m sorry, Y/N, I just thought money was tight and I wanted to help.” She said, her voice wavering as she tried to give you an honest answer, even given her current physical condition. You couldn’t help but feel bad for her as she used her remaining energy to reply to you, almost making you regret the way you had just scolded her. Still, your concern for her safety and wellbeing was genuine, and you had wished that she would take what you said to heart, especially because

“Honey…you know we can make it work–we always do. I could pick up some extra shifts or get another job or something.” You responded, slightly surprised that her motivation for risking her life was for money. That, on the surface, didn’t really seem like her.

“What, so you can get more stressed and leave me more often? Why do you even care so much about this?” She questioned, with genuine curiosity.

“I want to have a baby with you.” You stated, the weight of the statement hanging in the silence of the small bathroom. Your girlfriend’s eyes had widened to an almost comical size, and if you weren’t familiar with how she generally reacted to new or shocking information you likely would have burst out laughing. You had always known you wanted a family with Yelena, even if that just meant the two of you growing old together. Ever since you signed both of your names on the lease to the apartment you were currently in, you felt whole, as though you were waiting for this moment your entire life. The next step, naturally, was expanding your family at some point, but with the way she was constantly living on the edge and putting herself in harm's way recently, you didn’t see that happening, well…ever.

Yelena was all you could ask for in a partner, and then some. She was very giving, and constantly showers you in affection and love. She was the type of person to casually hear you mention something you were interested in and then go out and buy it for you the next day. After she had opened up to you about her background and all of the pain she had to endure for years, you weren’t surprised that she would often go out of her way to make you feel loved–she really didn’t have anyone to do that for her when she was younger. When you had received the news that her sister had passed away, she was a wreck for weeks, refusing to even leave the house. You had been her rock during that time; her only tie to the outside world that had been so cruel to her.

As with any relationship, however, it’s through the shared experiences that you have with the other person that the two of you grow. This has been the mantra you lived by when you had first committed to a relationship with Yelena, especially when she had been actively assigned to various jobs for a multitude of contacts and organizations. Still, however, you found yourself wanting to protect her from the dangers of the outside world, and you couldn’t think of a better way to do it than to settle down with her and raise a family of your own.

Yelena’s shifting on the countertop brought you back to the present moment. She gestured to your lower half with the arm opposite to the now clean wound on her neck. “A baby?! You do know that we both have…uh…you know.” She gestured to her own lower half to stress what she was trying to say.

You rolled your eyes, aware of what was in both yours and her pants. “Uh, yeah. I do. That’s actually kinda why I’m with you.” You joked, though there was truth behind your statement. You had been in many–failed–relationships with all sorts of people, yet no one had made you feel as loved as Yelena. Sure, it was a bit difficult navigating the world together, especially when people you had previously called friends or even family had seemingly turned a blind eye and disappeared. If it meant getting to be with the woman of your dreams, however, you didn’t mind one bit.

“Do you think that I would even be a good mom?” She asked, sliding off the countertop with a pained expression on her face.

“Wait! I didn’t get a chance to fully patch you up.” You interjected, concerned that her wound was going to reopen and you would have to clean more than just her neck once again.

She stood up fully and crossed her arms, smirking slightly. “I asked you a question, лапочка [honey].”

You caved at that, internally cursing at yourself for how much of an effect this woman has on you. “Honestly, yeah. I’ve seen how passionate you can become about something you have committed yourself to, and I think that with everything you have been through you would work tirelessly to provide an amazing life for our kid.” You had seen how she had cared for the kid she met in New York City a while back–even though it had been your idea to have her make mac and cheese upon properly meeting the other girl.

Her eyes seemed to soften at the phrase ‘our kid,’ responding with a lighthearted tone. “Can’t we just get a dog or something? I met this cute doggie in New York who loved pizza.” She paused to judge your reaction, waving a hand in front of your face when she deemed your response too dull in comparison with what she was saying. “Do you hear me Y/N? The dog loved PIZZA! That’s like…the best thing ever!” Yelena exclaimed, clearly passionate about what she was sharing with you.

You couldn’t help but giggle, playing into her little anecdote. “Actually, I think the ‘best thing ever’’’ you began, with air quotes to enunciate the phrase, “would be a dog obsessed with varenyky [an Eastern European dish].”

Yelena’s laugh echoed throughout the entire apartment, and you would have moved to apply more pressure on her injury if you weren’t laughing along with her. You loved seeing her like this–minus the cuts and bruises of course; carefree and genuinely happy.

The two of you slowly eased out of your laughing fit, and Yelena reached her hand out to caress your check, ensuring that you were looking in her eyes. “You see, that was a test, and you just passed–of course I want to have a baby with you.”

You smiled a genuine smile at that, grabbing the cloth you had been using to clean her gash and giving the area a few final pats for good measure, before grabbing some tape and gauze. You began to get into the rhythm of covering what you could on her neck, when she broke the comfortable silence.

“I just can’t help but wonder…how do you want to, you know, do this? I have heard of a few methods of two women carrying a kid of their own but…like…” She trailed off, hoping that you could enlighten her.

The truth was, that you had been casually looking into this sort of thing recently. On the days and nights that Yelena would be out ‘working,’ you often busied yourself with educating yourself on the various methods same-sex couples had been employing to expand their families. You had certainly considered adoption, knowing that Yelena and her sister were both part of ‘the system’–albeit a messed up and far more intricate version of it–and for that reason you knew Yelena may be interested in going down that route. However, you had discovered that some of the more intimate options were available at a cost far less expensive than they were when they were first offered to the public.

You put on your ‘serious business face’ to answer her question, wanting to be as transparent as possible. “Honestly, I was thinking we could go the in vitro route. That way they can use either of our ova initially, and then the other person can be one who carries-”

She cut you off with her hand swiftly grabbing your own. “I have no idea what any of that means, любимая [darling], but I would love to go on this journey with you, and I trust whatever route you think would be best for us.”

You stepped back, smiling like a fool at the woman in front of you but refusing to let go of her hand that has now intertwined with your own.

“Why are you looking at me like that? Am I bleeding again?” She asked, tapping her fingers on her neck and looking irritated when she didn’t see any additional blood.

“No, I’m just taking in the sight of my future baby mama.” You replied with a cheeky grin, earning a light smack on your chest.

#yelena belova x reader #yelena belova x female reader #marvel fanfiction #marvel fic

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sinha-ri · 10 months

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I know nothing about your ocs so please give me the rundown I NEED to learn about them but have no idea where to start

Strap in this is going to be long bc i will give you a rundown of each lil fucker I have gl on the read ive been oc obsessed for YEARS also warning for lots and lots of dark and tragic themes not a single one of my ocs has a good life (at the start anyway)

Lily Artesia

he is the blorbo bleebus, the guy i was obsessed with for over 3 years and has over 110 art (that number is just as much as i could find on this laptop alone and NOT including shittier sketches)

he's 28 in present time, gay and asexual, trauma heavy fella, at this point its what hasn't happened to him he has the worst luck, chronic pain, shit dyslexia so he cant read, and his left eye is missing

He is a runaway prince from the holy star kingdom. His family is blessed by the stars and he is their first ever 2nd child, as they were "cursed" to only have 1 child, he has been the only outlier ever. This made him have a few of the blessings rather than all (list of said blessings)

As a runaway prince, he traveled across the sea to another land where he became a mercenary/bounty hunter, worked in the black market, dated a shit ton of questionable ppl, uhh..false sex work that ended up just being murder (as in..he murdered) before being kidnapped and enslaved for a year. He was saved but more like ownership traded w the military he uh, i guess he served there for a while and got in a questionable relationship with Valdis (more on him later) Almost died in battle, was saved by Oliver and ended up recovering and having a fufilling life with Oliver that turned to marriage :D.

He's a lil sarcastic, a big heart, arsonist, selfless, pretty empathetic, likes to murder (ppl he finds irredeemable), just a caring lil guy that copes in the only ways he knows which is ofc murder, self harm (this takes a few forms) and generally getting defensive where he can turn to violence if he really thinks he's in danger (which doesnt help when he has major anxiety and ptsd)

TOYHOUSE if you want anything on tumblr, just search lily in the tags of my blog and you will not run of content on there

2. Oliver Artesia

He is a favorite but sadly doesnt reach blorbo status as lily and hero but he's up there

30 in present time, demi sexual and romantic, doesnt know he has ptsd, isolated himself for over 5 years lol

Born as a grand mage (i cant find my source talking about this so uh, basically mages here are born with 1 skill type but grand mages can learn any skill type thats all you need to know (and theyre rare)) and a branch of the Artesia Family (rant here lol). Oliver's mother always wanted a daughter and so she would dress Oliver as one, enrolled him in school as such, and prevented him from trying to question her authority or pretty much do anything himself. She was abusive and held him to high standards. This led to a lot of bullying and being unable to make any friends.

This got him to be taken into the custody of his uncle, but once he hit 18, he was enrolled into the military (war just started) as a frontline medic. He absolutely hated this job and found it pointless to save someone who will only go back out to battle. He ended up committing War Crimes by lvling a field with foe and allies, tried to cause war disruption on his own, then let himself be caught so he could be bewitched (also cant find where i talked about this but basically, their magic is nerfed and theyre unable to physically lie), he ranaway soon after and lived alone for over 5 years in a refugee village, becoming the village doctor, herbalist, and pharmacist (he isnt licensed but he knows what he's doing)

He starts off selfish, blunt in adding unnecessary details/comments, has a really cheerful and upbeat energy to him but he will say the most vile bitchy thing ever, over confident in himself, smaaallllll power complex, comforting in his gender (being male) but will roast your ass if you call him she/her (Intentionally)

TOYHOUSE he is also one you can find a lot on my tumblr if you just search up his name on my blog

3. Jonah Artesia

the fucking baby boy, protect him with all your life

around 16 in the present, queer, god someone help this kid he is drowning in anxiety, low self esteem, and separation anxiety that makes him feel like he needs to be useful

Jonah was born into a Mage Family but was given the short end of the stick by being born a Dark Mage (a magic type that is feared and pretty much banned from these mages to practice at ALL), he was abandonded when this was discovered (around the age range 10-12). Trying to live a decent life, he found himself attempting to be useful via being a guide. He makes maps and sells them, he can read the stars and find his way out of most forests and places. He was finally taken in by a group of teenagers that needed a guide, in which he fit in perfectly. He tends to keep quiet and never voices his opinions, doing anything to be a ppl pleaser in hopes they'll let him stay, which they do after they find out he's a Dark Mage.

in the future, he ends up being adopted by Lily and Oliver, growing in a healthier steady environment where they try to help him recover and grow as a well adjusted adult

he's a big doormat, way too kind and caring and way too selfless, will never speak up for himself, he just doesnt wanna be left alone again and will give up as much of himself as it takes to :(

TOYHOUSE uhh you can find some lore on him but a few of it can be dated

4. Alexander (i dont have a last name yet sobbing)

he's recently been rising in my mind lately, he is the local WHORE

currently 32, his sexuality is anyone he can have sex with lol, he copes with sex, suffers from insomnia, he makes the absolutely worst dog shit decisions when it comes to his brother its astronomical how stupid he is and how much of a King manbaby he is with the way he approaches the situation.

The first son of the royal family and elder brother of Lily, he is currently King. He is the reason lily ranaway and blames himself for the rest of his life, aiming to make it right by all means. He is a good and caring leader that attempts to listen to his people. But he's very two faced in that he's actually super tired and bitter in the inside and would throw all this away if he could. He hates his job, he hates his life, he's miserable but never lets himself show it nor change how well he does his job. Due to his first lover having been someone who only used him to steal money from him, this man has never fallen in love since. The only intimate relationship he'd have with anyone is through sex but even than its under a disguise. He has no friends, he hates other royalty and nobles, but he will never lash this out on people. The kingdom loves him and he puts on a serene and comforting smile for them to stay trustworthy and complacent.

he's very Fake nice and flirty, he tries to look under the true intentions of anyone who attempts to have a relationship with him. Hardly trusts nor listents to anyone, he's actually pretty awkward when he isn't being King or doing official business, he just really does love sex

tOYHOUSE you probably wont find anything much on him on my tumblr except from pretty dated things i probably scrapped and are no longer canon lol

5. Valdis Nevermore

this is an image of him in the future but i dont have any of the present. i would say hes a himbo but hes problematic

31, bi, hes got a hero complex, turns from occasional drinker to alcoholic real quick after certain events, complicated family relationship

Valdis is born from a family of knights, and being the eldest, he follows in the footsteps of his father and his ancestors before. He knows there is a problem in the system, but he hopes to help change it from the inside, but finds himself following their orders more than questioning them. Despite this, he does have high morals especially when it comes to treating others and commoners. He attempts not to use his status as an advantage against others. However, once he is in charge of lily during lily's time in the military, he finds his passion reignited to question leadership and develops a hero complex towards Lily, feeling as if he has to help/save him but ends up making things far worse than they should. Once lily is assumed dead, valdis deserts as a Knight, gets disowned by his family, and is on a constant run from being tracked down. Lives with regret and drowns in alcohol

He is a very helpful guy, very kind to all, and a bit of a loser lol. Charming and charismatic when he's not wallowing in pity, he really does have a good heart that is misguided.

he has no toyhouse and very little information is avaliable on tumblr

6. Lenn (might change her name so ill just keep her nickname)

i have so little woman but GOD am i gay for her, she is wife

35, lesbian, she needs time off and doesnt deserve the treatment she gets fr, get a better job or beat alexander up

a half dragon half human that was "adopted" into the royal family. It was more like taking her in when she was a child, raised as their older sister, but eventually assigned herself the role as the royal guard to the brothers once their parents passed away. She has dedicated her life in trying to protect the remaining family she has, yet it seems alexander hasn't seen her as such in a long time. He hardly listens to her advice and attempts to shoo her away with unnecessary tasks. but she wont let up, even if they no longer see her as family she will strive to protect this family from ending itself even if her worth is no longer appreciated

when around alexander she is serious, stern, and straightforward. Yet in a casual setting, she's rather quiet and wants nothing more than have a moment to relax, yet her mind can't seem to let her. It's been long since she's ever been in a relaxed setting away from the King, but she can get pretty bashful away from it all

she has no toyhouse and almost nothing on my tumblr LOL

two more before i let you choose if you wanna listen about another OC that i will just list and give even more basic information on or give yourself a mental break from the absolute OC brain i have

7. Sergio Cartias

who brought their weed dad, for some reason i have so little of him yet he is SO loved

30, uhh, i forget what its called but he likes fem presenting people regardless of gender (but he is married to someone who uses she/her). honestly my most normal guy his biggest flaw is he smokes lol.

born from a mage family (listen..i did not realize how many of my ocs come from important Line families istg this was unintentional but when put together it does not seem that way) this branch specalizes in information and history, making him following in the line and steps of becoming a professor/teacher, specifically on witches. while the job was accepted by his family, the specifications and how he teaches about witches is not. The reason being he was Oliver's only friend that really sympathized with his situation and figured bewitching a mage doesn't exactly mean they're horrible people, because he couldnt believe some of the vile shit they would say about Oliver. He lived a fairly normal life with his spouse and being a pretty great teacher that students grew to love.

He's very laid back, he really is Just A Guy but in a good way and has the least drama carrying. He sees his own family above all, but he will be there for his friends or anyone who needs him or just someone who wants to talk to someone. Oh and he's a lightning mage and knows how to use magic with just his hands! (this is relevent?? sorta?? in my lore using your hands for magic casting is the ultimate control sign, as most mages use wands or other mediums given they have easier control with them than hands which is harder to master)

he doesnt have a toyhouse either and you can find some bare minimum stuff on tumblr

the next character is from an entirely separate universe/story, as everyone above is part of the same one.

8. Hero

foaming at the mouth and rolling around the dirt he is THE blorbo right now omfg I CANNOT stop thinking about this absolute piece of shit person he is my WORST character i fucking love him rn

228 years old baby, aro/ace with extreme sex repulsion and generally physical touch repulsion, god he is so fucked up there is so much wrong with him, might have autism but unrelated to him being an asshole he just isn't neurotypical aint no fucking way (this was done unintentionally btw but certain parts of him made me realize oh, typicals do not feel or think this way usually)

Born half human/half druid, he was left abandonded in a village filled with mixed species. He never knew his parents and he was never given a name. the village he lived in was raided by knights and many kids, including himself, were captured. After captured, he went through what is known as the Hero Project, in which they aimed to find and raise the most suitable to be the kingdom's official "hero". Hero, being the most human passing, was given an advantage already. When tests were conducted, he passed with desired results (praised/rewarded for following orders unquestioningly, least hesitant to harm others) It is no surprise he was the winning candidate to be Hero. Throughout, he was still never given a name but instead called by his title once he earned it. their biggest gripe with Hero was his personality, but through time, he learned to mask his true personality and instead showed one of heroism and kindness. All his expressions were calculated depending on who he was speaking to and especially in public. However, outside of the public eye, he was a nightmare to work with

He cared for no one, he is pure selfishness, he will strike down anyone in his way and in fact enjoys killing to an addictive degree. All crimes he's ever committed were swept under the rug in order to keep his image clean, and so he knew he could get away with anything he pleased. He will torment you in any way that will gratify him and worsen you, be it physical or mental torture. He thrives on seeing the expressions of despair and betrayal. He betrays his kingdom and party members at the drop of a hat because he was simply bored. He betrayed the only person that he somewhat cared for because he refused to change, continuing a campaign of destruction as he used his status as Hero to confuse those who haven't heard the news of his betrayal.

He's cynical, calculating, and will do anything to let himself stay in control of his life

TOYHOUSE there is also so much more lore on toyhouse but ive dropped quite a bit on my tumblr recently

Time for speed rundowns:

Peter/Petros/Petra: The leader of golems that will do all in their power to ensure they thrive. the oldest golem that has little hope for humans, but isn't stubborn enough to put their people in jeopardy over them

Jairo Torrance: A farmer that is currently the closest to a friend Oliver has. He is generally nice but dislikes Lily given he was there when lily temporarily ruled the kingdom

Diene Artesia: the eldest daughter of the artesia family and the next in line as head of the family, she is a lesbian disaster and monster fucker

Azazel: a golem that is half sheep/human, he is mute and the 2nd oldest golem, but he keeps his whimsy and cares for Ophiuchus

Ophiuchus: a golem that follows azazel around, he helps communicate to others what azazel attempts to say and keeps him company and protection

Caide/Mushi: a demon working under a prince of hell, he had forgotten his purpose on the surface before coming to his senses and continuing the plan they had set in motion

Dylan: a half demon/human who was named "Demon Lord" by humans despite being far from it, he wishes to leave in peace but when push came to shove, he will do what must be done

#ocs #original characters #hooooo boy gl anyone #lily #oliver #alexander #alex #ollie #valdis #val #jairo #hero #lenn #sergio #jonah

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natypinkns · 11 months

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Could we perhaps get some head canons for you humanised splatoon ocs??

oh !!!! yeah yeah let me talk about them for a bit :} warning: im about to ramble

okay so, first thing: theyre not reeeeally humanized splatoon ocs, they're a bit more like..... ocs who are based around my splatoon ones. taking some inspiration. like.... my splatoon guys in an alternate universe maybe? yeah. because im too attached to my splatoon ocs who ive spent years thinking about and didnt have the energy to come up with entirely new concepts (<- lazy ass)

second: i am so very slow and indecisive when it comes to developing oc stuff. appearances are one thing. backstory is a WHOLE other thing. and since im not even completely decided on how they look, you can guess how poorly developed their whole story thing is! i have a vibe in mind and a theme i want to mess around with but thats it. so:

oc name (splatoon oc theyre based around): brooks (tempest) sunday (dawn) clover (jamie)

i want an ordinary setting. a small quiet town with not much going on for it and people are content with their simple little lives. brooks and clover are siblings and their parents are kind of not home often. clover is attending university (art maybe? or oh OH botany. plant stuff. ooohoho) at the city next door, brooks has a simple part-time job (maybe shes like these newspaper delivery guys. going around the neighborhood early in the morning on her bicycle..... that sounds fitting with what she has going on).

sunday is new to town. lives on her own, moved there in search of peace and quiet, her dad still lives in the city. idk what she's passionate about yet but her dad is a mechanic of some kind and, having learned a lot from him, she helps out people in town, doing some repairs for neighbors here and there.

alison and olivia (yeah im keeping their names <3 i am free) are a married couple (in their 40-50s maybe) whose children are grown and moved into the city, so there's currently no use for the little separate house thing they have in their backyard; sunday moves into there. alison is a woodworker and writer, olivia is a local teacher, very involved with the school she works in (yeah theyre not too different from splatoon alivia).

sunday and brooks' dynamic is a bit different from dawn and tempest's, their roles are slightly reversed. brooks is more assertive and unashamed to flirt with and make moves on sunday. sunday is quieter and more reserved, although still very confident (shes basically not as intense as dawn is, i'd say?). temp is introverted, dawn is extroverted; brooks and sunday are both introverted (though brooks is introverted in a different way than tempest is).

oh oh this image might come in handy rn (outdated since brooks has a name now)

WHATEVER im stopping now. im literally developing these guys as im writing and if i dont put an end to it ill end up rambling forever and ever. anyway dont take these words too seriously as these ocs are still Very subject to change

#hey anon i dont even know if thats what you were looking for but. there #thank you for the ask!!!! :D #i want to make at least one ref of these guys for artfight. maybe just brooks maybe just sunday. we'll see if i'll manage #OH BOY 3AM i need to fix my sleep schedule. goodbye #asks #anonymous #my ocs

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icharchivist · 2 years

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the ssr epilogues! i actually did stumble into one of these by accident—when you mentioned tsuzuru’s SSR had mizuno’s letter in it I mistakenly assumed that the story associated with the card would contain the contents of the letter? so I ended up watching that. it was very sweet and nice. now, seeing nocturnality I wonder if all of these have the characters like sort of transported to the play/real world? it’s interesting. i STILL have questions abt the vampire hq tho (unless i missed smthing?). but anyways the WAY kota describes his and reo's relationship to azuma as “you… look like a friend of mine. he took care of me for a long time, so just think of this as me paying it forward” LIKE THE MEANING INHERENT IN ALL OF THAT!!!! like the way reo is draining his blood and everyone thinks that reo is a freeloader or leeching off of him and kota is the only one who understands it differently. the way that here when azuma gets attacked, he jumps into action and saves him! which is a reversal from before where he’s just there helpless… it was also sooo lovely how all of winter troupe was worried abt azuma, and the little differences between kota and tasuku and how azuma prefers tasuku as he is... its so nice. and then the way it went back to kota finding that he had more food than usual and he understood it to be reo? the way that reaffirmed his committment to finding him? sooo good. tasuku's backstage was also so funny. "how could you put garlic in the steak omi! its seriously dangerous to hisoka and azuma!" like i love how its just like. he takes all his concern for those two and channels it thru a "seeing them as vampires" lens but does not once think abt like. wow what if they are dangerous. so in character of him to be that way. also,,, ty for the note abt that winter troupe fight with azuma and tasuku! i had blocked most of it out of my memory bc i avoid conflict lol but thats such a good point.

the events in general are also soooo worth it for me... like, I feel they give me a much better understanding of all the characters, particularly ones I hadn't thought abt for a lot. like even the first two play events, i felt like that was rly what got me invested in itaru, and same w/ kazunari for sardine search. that especially... with operation campgrounds and sardine search i feel like i reallllly began to like get a better sense of what he was abt and feel more attached. overall theyre like sooooo worth it though like wow. like as you say, with the stranger onward they just do not pull their punches in terms of what they do... like, I could see skipping some of the multitroupe events, but the event plays? they genuinely feel inextricable from the main story. so absolutely ty for helping me experience them! if i was playing on my own I wouldn't have known about it at all. there's... six more events to go before act 2 i think? so that'll be fun. i may try to speed thru them a little since i dont think i'll be in for quite as much emotional devastation, yknow?

WAOHOO glad you could get around to read those!! BUT YEAH MAN i love the Nocturnality epilogue, the way Kota and Azuma talk about the two they care for is woooohhhh. I loved to see Winter worrying for Azuma and the way Tasuku worries especially is just, muah and YEAH this idea that Kota is still looking for Reo and that Reo still drops by to do things for him which still gives him hope… these two…. I feel like it works very well as the epilogue since, we continue from Tasuku's add libbed determination and show us that it's not all lost for them, they still will find a way back to each other eventually. man. BUT YEAH TASUKU'S BACKSTAGE STILL KILLS ME. the whole way he gets angry at Omi still KILLS ME it's so funny. And yeah, he's so deep into his role he could have taken the whole vampire thing anywhere but instead it was just, protect and lvoe them and HOW DARE not adjust for them!! it was so good And you're welcome about that, the Azuma/Tasuku's fight means a lot to me since it's a set up to just how far they've come when Nocturnality ends, it makes me unwell, i always have to remind of it

i'm SO glad you're enjoying the events sobs!! I totally agree, i think even at the start it gives you even more stuff to be invested. The mainstory chapters tend to do an overview of each character and focus on the bond of the troupe as a group, while the event gives more individual focus which really ends up being so rewarding in terms of how to care for the characters. But yeah, some multi troupe events could be skippable because there's less weight in them, but the event plays are chokeful of character development it just wouldn't work without it. It's too important. I'm really glad i could share it that way with you <3333 i'm so so glad.

So as events goes, you have 5/6 depending on how you intend to read them:

-hAve A greAt trip -A Very Mankai Christmas -New Years & New Beginnings -3 Cheers for Mankai Company -Valentine's Magic

and here's the kicker: Chapter 5 of the main story was released there.

Then, there was One Day Princess. From what i remember tho, nothing in ODP evokes what happened in chapter 5, except for Itaru's backstage which will show Chikage.

Valentine's Magic is the Vday event and ODP is the Wday event, so it depends if you want to read those two events together before moving on to act 2 or want to stick to the canon chronology of the story Then timeline wise it's going to be one event/one main chapter/one event/one main chapter ect.. until you run out of main chapter for act 2 and it's only event left. so basically.

-Chapter 5 -One Day Princess -Chapter 6 -A Springtime Snooze -Chapter 7 -Conquering Misohiosa Island -Chapter 8 -Various Vows of Love -and then it's all the events that are left

so here you are :3c almost there. now i'm sure the rest of the events will be a breeze to go through before act 2 right? ahah. I mean when has a3 ever been heartshattering and soulcrushing when you least expect it ahahahah… ahahah….

have fun :3c

#ichareply #ichafantalks a3 #aranarumei

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summonhouse · 1 year

Text

im going to ramble abt art websites for a bit and its maybe going to be disjointed and potentially mean bc 1. i speak for myself im not here to convince anyone of anything so i dont care about sounding nice? and 2. im feeling a little offkilter lately BUT

these are no more good art websites and its a pain to see a new art website crop up every week and everyones like, thisll be the one guys! bc i dont think in this day and age its possible.

first; websites should not be profittable. ive been thinking abt this w like, twitter and tumblr and deviantart too where the problem is that people want to make more profit- they dont want to break even, theyre not trying to cover the cost of hosting and paying employees, they need an excess. it shouldnt be like this bc thats how we get the lower in quality, thats how we get this trying to appeal to third party money providers and not users and its always bad and more than that its just unnecessary. every art website that people love are the ones that remain stagnant because its reliable, people do not want continual updates to the ui of something they depend upon for posting and money. new experimental features esp on art websites are just.. useless unless theyre asked for and the garbage fed to us isnt what we asked for.

what makes a good art website? something you can post images, gifs, perhaps low quality videos on, have larger text posts for pinning and smaller text posts for status updates. id say an important feature is a gallery and featured page- profile customization is also important, at the very least have icons, text around a username, descriptions, and headers.

can you tell im thinking of deviantart? i think deviantart is the premium art website and i am so sad everyone left at eclipse- honestly not even that sad at eclipse. it was bad, it was broken, deviantart now has a fuck ton of little holes in it where pages just dont load right, ill get on the fucking new notification page and user profile later, but the way that, in the old days, it had huge spanning galleries, and it had “post type” search too! and it was annoying at the time, we hated this, trying to pick what kind of art your posts were, but it helped make searching for specific posts so much easier (now trying to find gifs on my old accs without it is impossible..). thumbs were good easy ways for ppl to spread content meant to be spread while immediately linking to the actual post- it stopped people from reposting art or using html linking the image itself without a hyperlink to take back to the post and credit, because the thumb was immediately easy to use and way easier than working around it. there was so much... community. like ok from 14-16 i was harassed hard fucking core by adults on deviantart because i was an annoying whiny kid that used dA as my support platform, because from 11-14 it really was! everyone was nice to me- my art was hot dog shit, but i dont think i EVER got a comment calling it bad. i got a LOT of comments telling me that it was good, and i really did believe that! being a preteen drawing dogs online and getting genuine support, often from other artists of my ilk but not uncommonly by artists who were immediately visually BETTER than me really really helped me get to where i am now- i never doubted myself because i was surrounded by people who were so happy to draw just like me, and people loved to see everyone elses work and characters- the joy for characters and stories is really what propelled popularity even when my art wasnt good enough to uphold this. i remember seeing a post a long time ago mentioning that like... sites like dA remained bc they werent just for visual artists which is a great point too- it hosted lurkers really well, artists were really friendly to people who commented on their stuff even if they didnt post anything, im p sure it did fairly well for people who wrote a lot of content, i know some people got popular just because they commissioned people a lot, not bc they drew anything but bc their characters and name got popular.

i miss the old dA notification page, it was SO GOOODDD the folders for where you could store old notifications, the way it was so perfectly set up to maintain a bunch of different notifications all categorized by type, the way that they took note to stop posts that were submitted in multiple groups from appearing again and again in your notifs, the birthday warnings, it was just.. so sweet! page customization too- it was just so fun finding cute little things to put on your page, and so versatile and useful too because you could get like, boundary or commission status or language stamps on there! and like, when i was 14 i had recoded my page a few times over myself, it got me interested in html coding! and now its all gone- for what? because the sleek look is modern, and modern things get more money from investors, and the platforms dont appeal to users anymore, they appeal to investors, because they want more money- they need more money. its a hole they dug for themselves, kind of- i feel like people down the line hosting THEM want more money and so it dominos.

i loved points too, ik people thought they were useless and the worth was hard for ppl to get but $1=100 points was SO GOOD like i know buying points w usd incures a fee and so ur not getting 2000 points if you spend $20 but trading between people for a lesser fee was SO FUN i got banned for doing this a few times LMAO but it really brings a community together. it encourages younger ppl without paypal to try and do commission artwork without breaking the law, and it wasnt as if points were WORTHLESS, because i know i traded usd for them!

and like, everyones like.. twitter is better. twitter is chock full of algorithm nonesense, theres ads between every post, video audio doesnt really work right (if you click on a video on mobile it just decides you will hear every video you pass now. which will be in between every normal post in the form of a fucking ad), images get compressed to hell and ive never heard any information as to how to avoid this, gifs turn into bad videos, you still cant post multiple gifs (i think youre supposed to but well it doesnt fucking work!), just fucking try and host pixel art on here, theres on way to say long form things to people easily- “use threads” real talk, as a user, if i see a thread i do not click it, its too much work if not offered to me. i am 1 person and i represent hundreds who see your tweets. if you scroll down onto any featured popular post you will see nsfw or violent bigotry. i used to report every bit of bigotry i saw and got fast reception, near immediate banning- since owner turn over, a post disparagingly saying faggot has not been responded to in the past 48 hours. the community is fucking insane and i cant blame them, its how twitter is built- there is no separation between official posts and casual posts, like on deviantart wher ethere was differences between journals and statuses- everything youd post as a status that would have gone under the radar is a big proper real post, every comment you make is a big real post as well, it forces a lot of passing commentary to the forefront of peoples attention which of course incurs drama. and ofc its an ALGORITHM BASED PLATFORM which means it REWARDS RECEPTION, inlcuding NEGATIVE- any of your posts that you intended to have as private and only for your 5 followers if it gets enough traction gets blown out of proportion and every single other user will see it only as the post itself, as a big number post which means its open for ridicule. i feel like it was host to more psyops than dA ever was? dA had a bunch of trolls but never any govt psyops like that drug minor one

anyways new art platforms dont work out bc they dont have enough people or draw- if you just are allowing people to post images and text posts, even if you have better page customization id just use twitter because despite its cons it has the major pro of, you know, having people using it- if you make a new art platform every week, theres no real point to pursue any of them, id just wait and see which one flourished- and because i dont participate, they dont get clicks, they dont continue to grow, and they ALL die. anyways moderation is impossible in the way people like- i know everyone wants to believe their niche discourse is clean cut and actually go to show deeper oppression but moderators on websites do not care- discourse is ever evolving and so heated that they cannot afford to throw out a guess and likely no one ever explains themselves, just say This ideology is something or other. and we all want it to be so simple that everyone has the Right opinion on pro/antiship, or fetishes, or terfisms, or mogai, but i promise no matter how easy it seems to you there are thousands who violently refuse and will make up their own buzzwords about how their side is right and the other is something or other. like aside from banning slurs or cruelty they really cannot do much and likely would not ban people who have a special word in their description that you and you alone recognize as a dogwhistle for x ideology. this is the problem i know a few art websites had where they had to say clearly what they would and wouldnt allow and NO ONE was happy. also to revisit that point on hosting a lot of people, an art website that is JUST an art website is like.. its not going to get community or that response i mention from other ppl. if i get on a website just to post art, why would i comment on anyone elses?

and like, dA i know it has like front page or new algorithm which spotlights a LOT of fetish content, but honestly like. you just have to accept that theres going to be fetish content, its an art website, if you want new unseen artists spotlighted you have to acccept that in the fallout of that theres going to be fetish content.

so uhmmm theres nowhere to go and nothing to do. get your asses back on dA eclipse was glitchy and sucked and showed dA didnt respect user opinion but it has not been that bad. its functional at the very least and its only ever dysfunctional because YOU all left. i cant get reception not bc dA is broken but because theres no one left to see it

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seanking1 · 2 years

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What are Customized 404 Error Page Benefits?

There are many ways to get content for your website, but some people feel that 404 pages are unnecessary. Do you think 404 pages are necessary? It commonly happens—when you attempt to access a particular page on a website, a notice stating Error 404 or &404 page not found appears. You, as a visitor to the website, dont need to worry too much about it since your search didnt turn up the results you were looking for. You might decide to look for anything that will once again. This leads to the first issue: are 404 pages required? This query has been posed innumerable times, and the response is occasionally ambiguous. Well examine the benefits of 404 pages in this post and attempt to conclude their need.

What Exactly Is A 404 Page?

Users that attempt to access a page on our website that is not there are presented with a responsive 404 page, sometimes referred to as an error page. Your server shows this screen if the users requested URL cannot be located. The following are some reasons why redirecting to the homepage is bad for the user experience: After clicking a link to another website, users will be perplexed about how they arrived on the homepage. Users wont understand why they cant access the information made available to them. It is conceivable for one of your users to click a link and end up on a page unrelated to the one they were initially on. Utilizing 301 or 302 redirects on your website is also a poor seo strategy benefits. Some SEOs and website owners employ this strategy to maintain any link juice that the deleted or nonexistent material may have built up. Google can see it as a soft 404 error if you direct it to your homepage rather than a page that returns a 404 error.

Why Would You Need A Custom 404 Error Page?

Its not a big deal if your web visitors get on your 404-page design website templates, but it should be customized. A common fallacy is that 404 pages are the last place you want visitors to land, so they should be disregarded. The lack of a customized 404 page may negatively affect your websites user experience and search engine results. If you havent already, you should take advantage of your 404 pages opportunity to improve a bad situation. It could be challenging to imagine how someone could find up on your 404 error page. Even if you believe your website to be error-free, it happens far more frequently than you may imagine.

What Are the Benefits of A Customized 404 Error Page?

The uncertainty of not landing page builder they had expected to land on is removed by a customized 404 page. The user is told that their request encountered a problem. They could have mistyped the URL, the website might be momentarily down, or the page might no longer be available. A proper 404 page will acknowledge the problem and direct users back to the critical areas of the website. If you had utilized the usual HTTP error page, you would not have had the chance to give your users links that they would have found helpful. Readers may follow these links to your home page, your FAQ, or any other pertinent pages on your website that will persuade them to stay there longer than they could. Moreover, if a user searches for our blog post on content tips using the incorrect address and finds this, they wont be too far off what theyre searching for: Due to the ease with which they may access our blog, they may locate the information there. Having the user land on the specific page they were seeking is not always achievable, even though its not ideal.

If you work hard enough, you can:

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Conclusion

While 404 pages are not necessary, they can be helpful in some situations. A 404 page can help direct visitors to the correct page if you have a website with many pages. If you often make changes to your website, a 404 page can help ensure that visitors are directed to the most up- to-date version of your site. Lastly, you can work with a responsive 404-page maker for a customized page for your website. NinjaSites is the place if youre looking to create a responsive 404 page. Even when users are lost, make them feel welcomed on your website. Use an existing 404 Page Templates or make your own by customizing it. Get started with 500apps today!

#website builder #500apps #saas

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foulserpent · 2 years

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ok. the likes:reblogs ratio on here is never going to improve, and focusing on the likes:reblogs ratio will not help you as an artist (long post under cut)

also to be EXPLICITLY clear this is talking about broad issues applicable to every artist on the site. dont use this to shut down or ignore artists of color discussing how theyre treated compared to white artists. dont use this to shut down marginalized artists in general talking about how art addressing their identity or real world issues is ignored or tokenized. these are entirely separate issues. if youre reading this and thinking “yeah, these people should stop complaining!” fuck off and block me.

but yeah:

this is a microblogging platform that is designed around individual users curating the content of a blog and of their dashboard. what you reblog is put directly onto the dashboards of the people who follow you. the reblog function is designed as the main tool of curation, with the additional ability to be a sort of "reply" function, (though the way this is applied can be garish hence why its far more common to talk in tags)

‘likes’ on this site serve little to no algorithmic function noticeable to the average user (i dont know how they affect the search function, which is a fucking mess anyway and is barely used). the ‘like’ functionally is near-EXCLUSIVELY a method of communication, saying “i like this” “ive read this” “i agree with this”. this usage is so ubiquitous that most people will never actually look Through their likes, and may use drafts to save posts instead

with this in mind, the reason likes will always outstrip reblogs is that ‘liking’ is a very simple form of communication, while ‘reblogging’ functions as much as a tool as it does for communication. if someone likes a drawing but doesnt really want to reblog it, theyll "like" it to say "i like this". this is not someones confused attempt to provide you exposure, this is a form of communication.

additionally, reblogs on art will usually dwindle as they get farther from the source. most of your reblogs will be from followers who like Your work personally, understand Your takes on characters, etc, and unless a post "blows up" due to mass appeal reblogs will dwindle as the post spreads.

point being, the ratio will always be bad. there is no amount of demanding people change their behavior that will actually change how the site functions.

the goal of the “always reblog art you like” sentiment is usually for artists to get economic support, so im going to address it from this angle: if you arent getting reblogs on art without having to guilt trip people into it, you are not going to be getting many (if any) commissions at this time. thats just the reality. that doesnt make you a failure, or mean youll never get to that point, but it does mean you are not currently in a position where that’s going to happen.

reblogs also dont equal money, new followers, commissioners. like OF COURSE on a technical level, if every drawing you posted got lots of reblogs, youd likely net a follower or two, and that would add to potential customers. but thats just in theory. someone reblogging because they see "reblogs>likes" is substantially less likely to check you out and follow you than someone reblogging out of genuine interest. like most people on here dont have tons of money to throw around, so most commissions come from people who have followed you for a while and have a personal attachment to your art. the commissions i get that Arent from longtime followers are nigh-exclusively either niche aspects of my skillset, or p*rn lol.

if you are intending to make money off art (let alone an entire CAREER out of art) you absolutely need to find peace with this. if your self worth and ability to do art is wholly reliant on online engagement, you are going to get burned out before you ever get there. this isnt saying "pull yourself up by the bootstraps and WORK!!!!" its saying "if you dont find peace with this somehow you are going to not be able to make art". it sucks but this is not going to change anytime soon.

and like, part of this problem is just that its not peoples moral responsibility to be constantly providing ‘exposure’ to all art. like, the angle is that in this horrible capitalist system, we need to support each other. and yet youre also asking for this "support" to be purely transactional, for everyone who sees your art to be a customer or a networking opportunity. i think thats fair to ask when it comes to say, commission posts (which are literally About getting customers and networking), but not just every individual piece of art itself.

if you struggle with this and with self esteem from online engagement, id suggest reframing it- first of all understand that peoples "likes" (while being no substitute for real communication) are a compliment. liking and not reblogging isnt an insult, its saying "i like this (and dont necessarily want it on my blog)". would you really rather that people engage with you as an act of charity or pity than in earnest? will getting hollow reblogs from people only doing it because youll get mad otherwise actually help your self esteem?

and i know some people reading this rn might not want to hear all this from someone who they may perceive as a "popular artist". so please understand that i didnt come on here fully formed getting notes on my art (and also like, 'popular artist' on here usually means 'can pay a bill with art money sometimes'. im still living paycheck to paycheck). ive been posting art on the internet since ~2010 and ive only been able to get Any attention on my original stuff in the past few years. i got absolutely zero commissions the first few times i tried. even once my art started getting traction, it was only fandom content. if i based my self esteem on online engagement, i would have quit art before i left highschool.

so yeah, bottom line. there is no amount of asking people to change their behavior that will actually lead to a site not built for being an exposure vehicle to become one. ive been seeing variants of these posts pretty much my entire decade or so on this site. we need to collectively put that energy somewhere else

i really cant claim to know the solution, but i think one thing that weve lost that would help A LOT would be the return of like, curated blogs focusing on a specific topic. there used to be all these “fuck-yeah-[topic]” blogs that would just aggregate content about a topic, or a certain kind of art. like i used to follow ones that focused on ‘monster people’ art. theyd just scour tags and reblog any art related to the subject, and they were widely followed and engaged with, so they provided a lot of visibility to obscure artists. this form of curation is also fairly natural to how this site functions, hence why it Actually Worked to some degree

some of those blogs still exist, but they arent anywhere NEAR as central to the ecoystem as they used to be. i think individual communities on here producing these and working to get them noticed would be a HUGE help to a lot of artists

another behavior i think that Can be changed is just commenting more. like if you have a compliment in mind about someones art, say it! even if you dont reblog. i dont compliment everything i enjoy (bc i dont always have a specific compliment in mind and dont want to just bullshit one) but if i do have anything ill say it. what most people really want is communication and personal investment. of course, please dont turn this into that deviantart "dont fave without commenting" bs, this should be like. human interaction and not just another transaction.

the other aspect is how the tag system is fairly irrelevant and the search function is broken. in the past, browsing tags was a pretty standard thing for a lot of users. now, a lot of newer users dont even know the tag function still Exists outside of search. the tagging system was never super organized, but it used to be more of a thing that some tags functioned as loose communities. i think this could be improved through active intent to do so by the userbase, but theres little incentive to do so bc the tag and search system is broken.

and i dont know like Anything about web design, so im just gonna state what i would Like to see in theory, but some of this might be impractical. the search function needs to be fixed. every post tagged with a keyword should appear in searches for that keyword, none of the “only some of them seemingly at random” bullshit. there needs to be a clear and understandable algorithm to how searches are organized, with fully functional "sort by new" options, maybe “popular today/this month/all time” options based on both likes and reblogs. the search function needs to become a way that people can look for content in an organized capacity.

i also think that they Could introduce some degree of categorization for original posts. this would have to be very broad since this isnt just an art site, but you should at least be able to categorize your post as “art” and then be able to filter your searches to search for “art” results. this would re-incentivize use of the hypothetical improved search/tag system, and could be a great organizational tool if it was actually implemented properly.

ofc all that is something that tumblr staff would have to do and its not like theyre reading this or like they tend to Ever address user complaints, but i dont think wider demand for this sort of thing would hurt either. at this point im kind of just hoping for the near biblical level miracle of "potential art site designers see these sorts of complaints and create a new art platform that addresses these issues and it gets a huge userbase and we all have a great time" or "deviantart second coming". but i hope this is at least constructive and gives you something to think about . my final message, goodbye....

#oh also i hope the breaking down of the exact functions of the like/reblog features doesnt come off like #wildly patronizing #my intent was bc its jsut one of those things most people (including myself) never actually think about. but i read it over and was like #wait is this incredibly condescending

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fernweh-writes · 3 years

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Maybe the slasher reacting to an s/o that brings them a victim - you know like a victim escaped and met the s/o thinking it was another victim - and the s/o is like "oh... I have to take them back "and takes the victim with "oh yes I know a safe place" just to take the victim back with the slasher.

It's something specific I guess but I think maybe it would be funny because it's like "oh thanks for the help but don't do it again it's dangerous honey"

PD: also i really really love your writes :,v theyre so cute (and sorry for my english :,3)

The way you worded this was so cute op. I kinda ventured away from the whole being mistaken as a victim thing in some because I didn’t want it to get to repetitive. Also,I only wrote this for some of the slashers cause I couldn’t come up with ideas for some. May add onto it later, idk yet. But anyways, I hope you enjoy!

-Fern🌿

Pairings: Michael Meyers x Reader, Bo Sinclair x Reader, Vincent Sinclair x Reader, Thomas Hewitt x Reader, and Brahms Heelshire x Reader

Warnings: some contain slight nsfw content

S/O Gets Approached By A Victim Pt.1

Michael Myers

It was very rare for a victim to ever see the inside of the house you and Michael shared. Michael usually stalked his victims down in their own houses or even in public places, but never near your own home. He hated having you in harms way, never wanting you anywhere near the killing.

When you had returned home from work today however, you were quickly intercepted by a young woman before you could even open the door. She had ran up to you on the front porch, heaving for air. Here eyes were wild with fear and she was holding her side where blood covered her shirt and hand.

“You have to help me, please! He’s gonna kill me! I need you to help me, please, please, please.” She was begging for your help as she began to sob, not knowing she was only trapping herself. You of course knew that Michael was behind all of this, which meant that even though you pitied the girl, you couldn’t help her escape.

“Come on in, we can use the house phone to call you an ambulance and get the police out here,” you said in a comforting voice as you opened the door. The last thing you needed was for her to lash out at you. Little did she know, you didn’t have a land line. The only phone was nestled safely within your bag.

She scrambled into the kitchen frantically searching for a phone. “Calm down, honey. You’re only going to hurt yourself more if you don’t calm down.” You took your time stalling, grabbing an old rag from a kitchen drawer and handing it to her. “Here, hold this to your side and make sure to apply pressure.”

She continued to stumble around, “No! You don’t understand,” she grabbed your shoulders shaking you, “he’ll kill both of us. We have to hurry.”

The poor girl was so frantic and making so much noise as she had stumbled about that she hadn’t even noticed Michael walk through the door behind her. “I’m sorry honey, I’m afraid the only one in any danger here is you. You see, he wouldn’t hurt me.” With that, Michael quickly got rid of her.

When he reappeared he grabbed your arms, examining them for any marks. “Don’t worry love, I’m fine.” Nodding, he made his way upstairs, leaving you to get started on dinner.

Bo Sinclair

This time, it had only been two people that had stumbled into the hell hole that was Ambrose, a couple in their early twenties. Usually, Vincent would’ve been able to easily take out two people so you were surprised when the young man came limping up to you.

You had been planting flowers in front of the old house in an attempt to liven the place up a little bit. Gardening had become one of your hobbies considering there wasn’t much to do in Ambrose, and you could pretty much always be found out in front of the porch tending to the flowers.

The guy had been overjoyed when he found you, laughing hysterically. “Finally, someone actually lives in this freak town. Ma’am can you please help me! Some psycho, h-he killed my girlfriend and now he’s after me. Please, you gotta help me.”

You did your best to act surprised and sympathetic. “Oh, well, uhm I don’t have a phone in this old house but I can take you down to the station. Bo should be able to call someone for you, it’s just right down the road. Can you walk?” He was favoring his left foot but he nodded anyways, “I can manage.”

You allowed him to use your shoulder for leverage as you two made it down the hill to Bo’s shop. The bell chimed above the door, but with the blaring rock music, it was impossible to hear. “Honey,” you shouted over the music which was quickly shut off. “What is it dar-,” Bo spotted the man leaning on you, “oh, I see.”

The man rambled off his story to Bo who nodded in fake sympathy. “Well I’m afraid the phone down here don’t work either.” This caused the man beside you to grow angry. “Does anything work in this fucking shit hole?” Bo dropped his whole southern gentlemen act, “Now you got a lotta nerve-,” but the man rounded on you before he could finish. “You fucking bitch,” he pointed his finger in your face, “you told me this bastard could help but no, everything in this shitty town won’t even-“

He didn’t even get to finish his last sentence before a gunshot made your ears ring. You weren’t able to watch as he collapsed but luckily Bo pulled you into his chest before you had a chance to see the body lying on the ground. “I’m sorry about that darlin’. And I appreciate you tryna help and all but don’t ever do some stupid shit like that again, ya hear?”

Vincent Sinclair

You had simply been on your way back from the House of Wax to get started on dinner when someone slammed into you. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to knock you down. Come on, we have to go,” a shrill voice said in your ear. Sitting up you found a girl with leaves in her hair and scratches littering her arms looking around like a trapped animal.

“What in the world are you on about,” you yelled at her. “No one’s after you.” She began frantically shaking her head so hard you don’t know how she didn’t give herself a headache. “Yes there is, he trying to kill me! He’ll kill you to f you don’t hurry up, now come on!” She yanked on your arm trying to drag you god knows where with her.

“I’m not going anywhere with you. If there’s anyone in this town that’s crazy it’s you, now let me go!” You attempted to get out of her grasp which only caused her to shove you. “You know what? If you want to die then fine! Let that masked freak kill you, I’m leaving.”

You smiled at her as you saw the large figure approaching from behind her. “I’m afraid you’re not going to be going anywhere sweetie.” Vincent grabbed her before she had a chance to process what you had said. She kicked and flailed but Vincent didn’t seem phased whatsoever.

You didn’t see Vincent again until he snatched you away from where you were cutting up vegetables for dinner. “Hey! Vinny what in the world are you doing?” He carried you upstairs to your shared bedroom and dropped you down onto the bed. Gesturing for you to stay, he huffed and walked out, slamming the door shut behind you.

It was easy to tell that he was upset about the whole altercation you’d had with the girl. You began to pout knowing that it wasn’t your fault that she had gotten away and found you. Still, when Vincent came back you perked up, glad to see that he was okay. He sat down on the bed and pulled you int him. He looked over you, checking to see if she had left any marks. When he saw your skinned hands and elbows from where you had caught yourself he began fussing over you.

Before long, your scrapes had been disinfected and bandaged as well as they could be. You had told Vincent that there was no need, but he wouldn’t have it. He always turned into a complete mother hen whenever you had a mark that was placed upon you by anyone other than him.

Thomas Hewitt

Helping with victims would be a regular thing for you once you become a member of the Hewitt family. It’s expected of you, you have to pull your own weight around the place. If you fail to do so, the only thing that’ll save you would be the mercy of Thomas. You know he would protect you, but dealing with his angry family wouldn’t exactly result in a peaceful existence.

This time you did your usual routine of inviting in some poor travelers for a drink and some food. After all there were no other stops for miles and the Texas heat was absolutely brutal. Thomas knew the routine well, the two of you had a signal set up and everything. But this time you had been up at the store with Luda Mae when the visitors came though, meaning Thomas had to deal with a whole handful of people by himself.

It wasn’t Thomas fault they had gotten away, he was simply outnumbered. He was only person, it didn’t matter how good he was at his job, he couldn’t contain all of him. So when two of them stumbled into the store, begging you and Luda for help, you knew you had to intervene. Otherwise, Hoyt would give Thomas all kinds of hell.

Luda Mae quickly caught on, more than happy to help you keep them at the store. She helped to bandage up their wounds while you called the house phone, hoping and praying that someone would pick up for once. Of course, there was no answer, which meant you were going to have to take matters into your own hands without Hoyt getting involved.

“I’m sorry y’all but the phone ain’t working. If you’d like I can walk y’all up to my place, it’s just right up the road. We can try and call the sheriff there.” Luckily they agreed. Apparently they were to dazed to realize that you were leading them right back to the person they’d been running from. The first one stepped into one of the traps Hoyt had set up around the house, the other was quickly taken out with a gunshot from Monty who had been on the front porch.

When you saw Thomas you smiled, glad to see that he was okay. However, he didn’t look as happy to see you. He picked you up and threw you over his shoulder like you weighed nothing. You grew nervous as he carried you into the house and upstairs to your room. He threw you onto the bed and left you there without a second glance. You could hear the lock click shut behind him and something heavy slide in front of the door.

He had just locked you in… Even though you knew he was upset now, he wouldn’t be later. All that pent up tension always led to some pretty rough makeup sex and you couldn’t help but to grow excited as you thought of all the things Thomas could do to you when you returned.

Brahms Heelshire

Brahms doesn’t want anyone in his house or near his y/n. Visitors aren’t welcome, if Malcolm wasn’t the only way of getting groceries then even he wouldn’t be welcome on the premises. Even then, Malcolm still isn’t allowed to stay for very long. Brahms claims that “he looks at you like he wants to take you from me.” So Malcolm only stays long enough to help you put away groceries, and any small talk has to occur during that time. You can’t have Brahms lashing out at the grocery boy. Besides, after Malcolm met Brahms, he wasn’t interested in pushing the limit of how long he was welcome.

The problem came about when your sibling had given one of your old friends the address. They had taken it upon themselves to fly out and surprise you by showing up at the front door without any warning. They had also taken it upon themselves to bring some of their friends with them, ones you remember hating in school because of how mean they were to you. It was safe to say that some things never changed.

As soon as you opened the door you panicked. You didn’t know what to do, and of course they just let themselves in before you could come up with an excuse. It hadn’t even been a whole 5 minutes before you heard Brahms angrily thumping around within the walls. When your friend asked what all the racket was you simply explained that it was an old house. “So you live in a run down dump. In a way that’s so…like you.” You were hating these people more and more every second.

Eventually you relented and settled on watching a movie with them hoping they would leave soon after. You and your friend chatted the whole time, you hadn’t even realized one of the girls had wandered off until you heard her scream. Immediately, you knew that Brahms had run out of patience. Everyone followed you as you ran towards where the scream had come from and your stomach sank knowing that you were leading them all to their deaths.

You couldn’t stick around long enough to watch your friend get killed along with the others. Instead, you locked yourself into your room and began to sob. Brahms was going to be pissed at you to and you knew how he could be when he was this angry. He got impulsive and violent, those two simply didn’t go together.

When Brahms threw open the door it startled you. Before he could even move you began to rattle out your apology. “Brahms I’m sorry. I don’t even know how they found this place, the girl with the dark hair was the only one that was even my friend. The other two never even liked me, I don’t know they they came or why she brought them. It’s been years since-“ he cut you off by hugging you tightly.

Brahms placed a gentle kiss to your head. “I know it’s not your fault, y/n. I saw the way those other two treated you my love, you didn’t deserve that. So I got rid of them for you! But I promise I was still good, I let your friend go!” You sighed with relief knowing that she was safe and relaxed into Brahms. Surprisingly, you weren’t as upset as you should’ve been at the deaths of those two people.

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writingonsaturn · 3 years

Text

Better Unsaid

a/n okay this has been all over the place!! it was originally going to be a blurb and darker and closer to smutty (so keep your eyes out for that??? lol), but then I made it softer and the concept got away from me and it got soooo much longer than expected lmao and i still dont love where it ended so maybe part 2?? i have the idea i just dont know lol

summary: Reader is a princess and Anakin has been her guard during the most public season for the past two years (not the most logical thing but just go with it lol, it gets explained better in the fic) and after a near death experience the two are conveniently forced into a....

ONE BED TROPE ONE BED TROPE *cough cough* ONE BED TROPE WITH ONE PERSON HAVING TO WAKE UP THE OTHER BC THEYRE HAVING A NIGHTMARE,, :)))))))

His smugness is the only thing about him I can consider ‘ugly’. And because I am so desperate to not have feeling for Anakin, the Jedi who has been assigned to protect me through coronation season (which lasts for most of winter), for the last two coronation seasons, I hold onto my distaste for that side of him. Which is why I suppress my laugh as he waits for my reaction with that confident smile.

“Come on, that was funny.”

Rolling my eyes, I let myself sit on my bed. I can’t tell if he’s actually funny or if my evening has been so boring that his sense of humor has started to become appealing to me due to comparison. In short, the suitor I was forced to spend an entire evening with lacked personality so much I’m starting to find Anakin funny.

“You’re much more entertaining than this evening’s suitor.”

Anakin’s expression shifts slightly, his assured grin dropping slightly. “Another miss?”

“You have no idea.” I relax slightly, taking a moment to be glad that I completed my father’s request and now I can just enjoy the time I have with Anakin. “I know my father’s desperate to make sure my marriage is useful for our people and that he worries about this selection process because he always thought my mother would be here to help, but sometimes I wish he wouldn’t rush it so much. It feels like all he wants me for is to marry me off in exchange of finance or weaponry or something diplomatic.”

“You’re more than that.” His response is so soft I think I might have missed it if I needed it less. I curse myself for feeling so validated by him. His words shouldn’t mean anything to me. After all, he could easily just be saying that because agreeing with my father will just make me more unpleasant to be around.

I smile politely while avoiding his eyes. I keep my hands on either side of me, fighting the urge to fidget. “Thank you, Anakin.” My words sound weak in my own ears, so I’m sure he notices my shift in mood. “I’m tired today, I think I’m going to go to bed early.” Normally, I’d be able to shrug off these kinds of things, but the beginning of Coronation Season makes me irritable. The anniversary of my mother’s death hits me harder each year.

“Y/n.” My name comes out so velvety I can’t find it in myself to interrupt him. “You are more than someone meant to be used as some kind of royal currency, and I mean that as more than just a...friend.”

I let his last word linger. We’ve tried so many titles that never seem to fit right. He’s the chosen one, one of the most powerful Jedi to exist, and the Jedi assigned to protect me each Coronation Season because that’s when my mother was assassinated. He’s my guard, but we’ve spent too many nights laughing together and talking about everything and anything. And I guess now he’s my friend, even though sometimes when he looks at me in a certain way or sits too close to me or reaches for my hand to guide me somewhere I can’t breathe right.

“Anakin, you know I love when you’re here, even though sometimes you drive me insane. And I appreciate your kindness, but your words can’t change the truth. That’s how my father sees me and he’s not exactly wrong. I’m not a son, I haven’t been raised to lead an army or lead much, and--”

“I’ve seen you in meeting after meeting, convention after convention. I’ve witnessed the way you handle real problems and I know how you care about your people. You’d make a great leader, you don’t need a husband to be valuable.”

My chest swells, feelings I never let myself think about mixing with thoughts of Anakin that I’ve spent so long trying to avoid. “That settles it, you’re my favorite person.”

He grins, the look warm enough to melt the odd lump in my throat. I fight down a smile as he steps forward. “And I wasn’t before?”

“I take it back--your head’s big enough without the additional praise.”

Rolling my eyes, I lean back slightly in order to recreate the distance he so easily destroyed. “And I thought you had finally warmed up to me, princess.”

The use of my title makes me skeptical. The last time Anakin used it was when he was trying to ease me so that I’d walk around the palace garden so he had an excuse to do the same. It was beyond late and I was half asleep, but he had os much energy he was desperate and just needed to do one more thing. I felt bad that his schedule revolved so heavily around mine (and when he softens his eyes and says please, I’m left incapable of saying the word ‘no’) so I agreed.

“What do you want?”

Anakin dramatically clutches a hand over his heart. He throws his head back slightly as if he’s just taken a fatal blow. “When did you turn so cynical? I’ve been back for three days and I’m starting to believe you’re a different person now.”

Yeah...he’s definitely getting ready to ask for something that’s more trouble than it’s worth. Then again, everything with him seems to be worth it in some capacity. Even if it’s just that one smile he gets when he’s truly content and doesn’t think anyone’s looking.

“Mhm,” I mumble, still fighting a grin, “so you’re not going to ask me anything?”

His lips part slightly as he exhales. I watch the way his eyes narrow at my victorious expression. “I don’t have anything to ask of you, but I do have a small request. A request so small you won’t have to do anything but say yes.”

Suspicious. Too easy. “You’re unbelievable.”

“You just said I was your favorite person. Remember that.”

I’m too tired for his coyness. I’d rather him make his ridiculous request now so that I can be in bed within the hour. Though I can’t pretend I don’t normally feel better after letting him drag me along on whatever ‘adventure’ he just needed to complete while also not letting me out of his sight. I used to tell him that I wouldn’t tell anyone if I wasn’t under supervision for an hour or two a day, but he dismissed the idea immediately. That’s been the cornerstone of everything.

“What is it?”

He sighs once, tilting his head slightly. The way his eyes soften tells me he’s already won at least half the battle. “They still haven’t caught the attempted--” Anakin pauses, something behind his eyes darkening. I know what he’s remembering. Last night, an assassin had gotten closer than they ever had. I had almost been shot in the garden, Anakin had barely pushed me to the ground in time. A fact he’s been beating himself up for since, especially considering that no one has been able to find my attempted killer yet. “They were so close to you. They were within palace limits and they disappeared like they never existed. Who’s to say they don’t work here and are waiting for the next moment you’re exposed? Who’s to say they aren’t here tonight, waiting for me to retire for the night?”

I didn’t realize how my near death experience had been so personal to him. He, like everyone else, was beyond frantic after it happened. But my father put an end to verbal worry before it could truly begin. He said the best thing we could do was act like everything was fine as the assailant was searched for. Anakin hadn’t been particularly cheery after my father instructed the guards to focus their search on known enemies instead of prioritizing venting the staff closest to me. I comforted him as best as I could, but he didn’t feel like speaking about it and I had to worry about the suitor meeting my father wouldn’t let me cancel.

“Anakin, you’re right next door to me.” I have to fight the urge to reach for him. “I was fine because of you, and I will be fine because of you.”

He sighs once, his expression not easing. “And if the person is silent? The attacker could easily work in the palace, but no one wanted to direct the search inwards.” His words are more strained than I’ve ever heard them be. “I think it’d be smart for me to stay in here. I know you’ve refused having a guard stay in your room or outside your door, but...” Anakin sighs. “Your safety would be more assured.”

Him staying in my room? The only line I’ve ever been allowed to draw, and I’m actually considering letting that go. If he seemed even slightly less sad, I wouldn’t even consider it. It’s not a good idea. I’m already too attached to him. “Anakin--”

“I’d feel more assured.”

Damn him. Stupid, extremely sweet Anakin who makes saying no to him impossible. I stretch my arm forward, letting my hand squeezes his forearm gently. “There’s no reason to not feel assured.” He doesn’t ease, the cloudiness behind his eyes remains stubborn. “You’re still worried.” No reaction, the haze that’s taken him isn’t letting go. “Fine--but tell no one or my father is going to take to posting guards at my door every night.”

...I guess there are worse ways to spend a night. Which is kind of a problem since I’m trying to...enjoy Anakin less. Ugh, I even sound dumb in my head. “I promise, princess.”

Ugh, he’s adorable. “You’re intolerable.” I stand from he foot of my bed and pull back the covers on my bed. He doesn’t reply, something dark still playing for him. I watch him move to face the door. Wait--is he doing what I think he’s doing? “No, you’re not going to stand there all night. You need sleep.” He has the audacity to give me an annoyed look. “I already didn’t want to do this so now you have to listen to my conditions.”

He raises an eyebrow, his lips pressing together oddly. He’s trying to gauge something from my expression, perhaps he’s looking for buttons to press to get his way. I guess I look as stubborn as I feel because instead of arguing he just sits on the floor. What? I watch him cautiously, trying to figure out if this is some weird argument trick.

“What are you doing?”

“What you asked.”

And just like that I’ve put myself in a position that I will no doubt regret terribly the second common sense returns to me. There’s no way to deny that Anakin and I are closer than we probably should be. We’ve felt like friends first since the day we first met. I can’t think of any reason to not offer to let him sleep in my bed except those stupid budding feelings I refuse to label.

It’s not like I actually like him. I can’t--I’m going to be married to some nobleman and he’s prohibited from ever forming attachments. I’m not even sure if we’re allowed to be friends. Having actual feelings for him would be so, so pointless. It would just lead to heartache and the ruining of the one genuine relationship I have. I’m just a tiny bit confused right now because he’s objectively really attractive and he’s always there for me. Always there to make a joke after a particularly rough meeting. Always there to offer me a supportive smile. Always there to humble me when I teeter on acting like my father.

Anyone’s heart would flutter at that, so it doesn’t mean anything. And if it does, I need to squash any budding feelings now before I mess things up. Which is why I should keep him at arm’s length until I get it together. But is that fair to him? And what if doing that is making things worse? What if it’s just reinforcing the idea of having feelings?

This is ridiculous. I’m going to get over this if it kills me. It’s just a bed and it’s only sleeping. I’m meant to be able to lead an entire union and I can’t sleep next to someone and act normal?” “You don’t have to sleep on the floor.”

The second the words leave my mouth I regret it all. What’s wrong with me? Did I seriously think I’d be okay?

I hear his soft exhale, “I’ll be fine. I’ve slept in worse places than on your marble floor.”

His voice sounds so weighted I can’t help but feel bad for not noticing that he’s still bothered. Whether he’s upset about his near miss or the fact that my father didn’t take his advice, I don’t know. But something’s wrong. The easy thing to do would be to just let him sleep it off. The smart thing to do would be to leave him alone until tomorrow.

I think of all the times that I’ve been upset and Anakin had refused to let me go to sleep angry or sad or overwhelmed. “I know, but it’s really not a big deal. It’s not like we don’t know each other. I mean, last Coronation Season you buttoned me into more gowns than my handmaid. And I owe you for saving me from one of the worst suitors I’ve ever had.”

“I’m starting to think we need to develop some kind of signal.”

The tiny bit of lightness that’s returned to his voice makes all of my internal struggle feel worth it. “You always seem to know.”

“That’s because when you’re reaching your limit, that one line appears between your eyebrows.”

I didn’t realize I had such a tell. I try to remember the way that the suitor drawled on and on about how amazing he was and how he couldn’t wait for the day he had a bride to bear his children and plan (tedious) social events. My hand moves to my forehead, trying to feel the crease Anakin mentioned. Can everyone tell when I’m growing tired? Am I that transparent?

Anakin’s slight laugh steals my attention. He’s facing me again, his elbow holding his head up on the foot of my bed. “What are you doing?”

“I don’t--I don’t think i get a crease between my eyebrows when I’m irritated.”

I hear him stand. I don’t realize he’s approaching me until he’s so close I could touch him without even needing. to stretch. “No, when you’re irritated you raise your eyebrows slightly, because that’s when you’re at your most sarcastic.”

“Really?”

The corner of his mouth tugs upwards. “Just like that.” I force myself to keep my expression blank. “When you’re reaching your limit, your eyebrows crease here.” His finger taps the space between my brows so gently I almost don’t realize what he’s doing. “And when you’re trying not to laugh--which is often, because you refuse to admit that I’m funny--you press your lips together in a way that forms a dimple here.” The knuckle of his pointer finger brushes against the bottom of my cheek.

I bite my tongue to fight the warmth spreading across my face. “I didn’t realize i was so transparent.”

“I can’t always tell what you’re thinking.”

“I’ll take it.” Maybe if I was less tired, I’d argue a little more. “You know you’re not that difficult to read either.”

“Really?”

“Yes, I can tell when you’re just being stubborn for the sake of it. I can see it in your eyes and you’re doing it right now.”

His expression harshens slightly before softening. “Y/n--”

“I’m not wrong.”

He sighs once, stepping back. I watch him pace around my bed before taking a seat on the edge of my other side of the bed. “Are you happy now?”

“Happy that I won? Absolutely.”

Anakin halfheartedly glares at me. “Careful, add a crown and a robe that trails down a throne and I’d feel like I was speaking to your father.”

“Careful, another side comment like that and I’ll ‘accidentally’ kick you off the bed in the middle of the night.”

“Not if I kick you off the bed first.”

I trace a thoughtless pattern on the fabric of my bedsheets. “What are you? Twelve?”

“I’m older than you.”

“Barely.” I continue the thoughtless pattern tracing as I fight the sleep from my eyes. “Your comebacks are usually more creative than that.”

He exhales, relaxing slightly as he rests his back against a pillow. “I’m tired, like you claimed to be.” His eyes flutter slightly, a bit of his exhaustion showing. “Go to sleep.”

I should. I’m too old to think I can put off a tomorrow I don’t want by just staying up. This is stupid. I’m too old to think I can put off the anniversary of my mother’s death by going to bed. She had been taken from us on castle grounds, killed by a revolutionist who viewed my mother as a class traitor. I still remember the way she slumped to the ground, her blood staining the snow beneath her. I remember the way the guards were so busy chasing her killer no one thought to keep me away from the body.

“Y/n?”

I scratch the back of my arm in hopes of banishing my thoughts. “Yes?”

“You’re being quiet.”

“You said to go to sleep, that tends to be a quiet thing.”

I can feel his eyes on me. “Since when do you listen to me?” Not trusting myself to actually reply, I only offer him a hum of acknowledgement. “I know you’re not half asleep.”

Folding my hands on my lap, I avoid his gaze. “It’s tomorrow.”

I don’t know why I trust him to understand my vague response, but I do. His silence stretches over us like a thin blanket on a cold night. Maybe he doesn’t understand what I’m implying. I can always correct him tomorrow, when my eyelids are no longer as heavy as my heart. The more seconds that pass in total silence, the more I think that maybe he’s fallen asleep.

I wouldn’t be surprised, Anakin has seemed tired recently, like some additional weight he won’t share with anyone has been thrust onto his shoulders. A small part of me rolls in guilt. I need to be a better friend, just because I’m suddenly a little too aware of him doesn’t mean I can shrug him off and ignore him.

My hand almost flinches away from the feeling of something surprisingly warm touching my pinky. When I realize that it’s just Anakin and that the contact was probably accidental, I force myself to ease. It’s not like we’ve never touched before, I don’t understand why I’m making it weird. Sitting in my bed in the dark doesn’t change anything. His hand turns slightly, pressing into mine a little more assuredly. Biting my tongue, I turn my hand slightly, exposing my palm. And just like that, our fingers intertwine.

“She would have been proud of you.” His voice comes out so low I barely register the words.

The words shouldn’t mean much to me--he never knew my mother and has no way to know what she wanted me to be.--and yet I find comfort in them. I smile, turning my head towards him. “You didn’t even know her.”

He rolls his eyes slightly, relaxing further before squeezing my hand once. “Who wouldn’t be proud of you? You’re kind and smart and decent to be around when you’re not telling me what to do.”

My heart swells in my chest so much I’m surprised it doesn’t burst. Could he be cuter? “Yeah...now I’m sure you’re my favorite person.”

“Now you’re sure?”

The smugness in his voice has me rolling my eyes. “Don’t make me regret saying that.”

“Maybe in the morning,” he says easily, “now go to sleep. There’s nothing worse than escorting you from meeting to meeting while you’re tired.”

“I’m not that bad.” Even in this darkness, I can make out the way he raises an eyebrow. “Shut up--I’m going to sleep, but not because of you.”

He lets out a slight huff. “You’re impossible.”

The desire to respond to his comment is not enough for me to win the fight against the weight of my eyelids. The moment my eyes shut, I feel powerless to anything that isn’t sleep. I let myself fall into a weightless sleep, my only tether being the Anakin’s fingers around mine.

A distant noise yanks me from my sleep. I’m too drowsy to do anything but register the sound. I hear another similar...whine? cry? I can’t tell and I’m too asleep to figure it out. I almost fall asleep again, but a third distressed sound keeps me from it. I wipe my eyes lazily with the back of my hand as I try to sit up.

Squinting, I make out a figure on my bed. It takes me a moment to remember Anakin and how I fell asleep. Our hands are still together and no light is peering through my window so it can’t be that long since I fell asleep. Another disgruntled sound carries itself throughout the room. I shift slightly, leaning over Anakin cautiously.

Golden brown curls are beginning to stick to his forehead and his eyebrows are drawn together sharply. He’s having a nightmare. I shift even further forward before cautiously placing a hand on his shoulder before squeezing him gently.

“Anakin,” I whisper, “it’s not--it’s not real.” His eyebrows draw together even more harshly. I shake him a little more stubbornly. “Anakin, wake up--you’re having a ni--”

My forearm is grabbed so suddenly I barely register it before I feel my back shoved into my mattress. I blink twice. His dark eyes are frantic and the look on his face is far from the gentle, easygoing expression I’m used to. He’s breathing deeply, his chest rising and falling from above me. I swallow a slight panic and something I don’t understand as I try to keep my eyes on his face and my thoughts away from how close he is. Anakin pries his fingers from my forearm one by one until only his palm is touching me.

“Y/n, I--”

“It’s okay.” Honestly, I’m more worried about his uneven breathing than the way he grabbed me. I can’t imagine everything he’s been through or how justified his nightmares are. Anakin moves his hand away from me. I don’t sit up until he’s off of me and sitting with his back against my headboard. “It’s okay--I just--you were having a nightmare and I thought I should wake you.” He doesn’t react. I turn my body further, keeping my back straight. Anakin doesn’t move, and the longer he stays still, the more I feel like I should say something else. “Do you want talk about it? Or do--do you want to talk about something else? Or go to sleep? Or get some water? Or--” The far off look behind his eyes silences me. I scoot forward slightly. “You’re okay, Anakin, I promise.”

His head turns at that, his eyes searching mine for something I don’t understand. “I thought...” He cuts himself off by swallowing once.

I shift a little more, trying to find anything normal in his expression. “Thought what?”

Anakin’s hand is on my arm so quickly I don’t even register his movement. I let his fingers press into my skin. He’s holding onto me like I’m a figment of a dream and he’s beginning to wake up. “I thought I’d failed.” He exhales, the sound heavy. “Failed you and that you’d--I thought I had lost you.”

A lump rises in my throat, thick and unmoving. Cautiously, I place my hand over the one still gripping my shoulder like a lifeline. “You didn’t. Nothing happened, it was just a dream.”

His gaze falls to the ground before he repeats the last of my words. “Just a dream.” There’s a hollowness to his voice I don’t understand.

I exhale, carefully running my thumb over his knuckles. “Yes.” He doesn’t say anything but his expression hardens again. I let us sit there like that for a long minute. “I promise.”

“You can’t promise things like that.”

I sigh, unsure of where to go from here. “Bad dreams are only bad dreams.” He doesn’t reply. “I think you should try to get some more sleep.”

Anakin is unresponsive. I shift back, but before I can transition from almost being on top of him to just sitting next to him, he pulls on my arm to keep in place. “I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you.”

“Nothing’s going to happen to me.”

“You almost died today, y/n. I was right there and if I had been a second later--”

“But you weren’t.” He doesn’t ease. “You were there and I was fine. Don’t torment yourself over what could have been. You’ll drive yourself crazy.”

“If anything ever happened to y--”

“It’s not going to,” I whisper, ignoring the way his hold on my arm tightens even further, “Especially this time a year when I have a pretty good gau--”

He tilts his head slightly, eyebrows drawing together and a ghost of a smile on his lips. “Pretty good? Really?”

“Someone needs to watch your ego, chosen one.” This time when he tries for a smile, the look has some strength behind it. Relief pools in my stomach. “Now get some sleep, tomorrow’s a busy day and when you’re sleepy you’re beyond irritable.”

Anakin lets me pull away enough to lay down, but he doesn’t follow. Not for a long second. When he does, his movements are impossibly rigid. I watch him out of the corner of my eye as carefully as I can manage.

“Y/n?”

I regret turning my head immediately. I didn’t realize how close he was. It would take no effort from me to make our lips meet. Wait--why am I thinking of that? I’m not allowed to think of stuff like that...especially not about him.

“Yes?”

He lets out a breath before moving his hand. I don’t understand his hesitation until I feel his hand cupping my cheek gently. “What if next time I’m not enough? What if next time I lose you because I’m not strong enough?”

I never thought my death would be such a personal thing to him. Sure, I knew that we had some kind of bond, some kind of friendship, and that my death would bring sadness. But I never imagined I’d matter enough to him that thoughts of my death would be frightening enough to slip into his subconscious and become a thing of nightmares.

“You are enough. Nothing is going to happen to me and if it does it’s not going to be because of you.” Anakin’s lips press together in a way that implies serious uncertainty. His thumb brushes across my cheek so unexpectedly I almost ask him what he’s doing. The intensity behind his eyes is enough to burn me. “Was your dream really that bad?”

He lets out an uncertain breath as his eyebrows draw together. I don’t miss the way his jaw clenches. “It’s more than the dream. I...y/n, princess,” he tacts on, a hint of humor returning to him, “you’re more than a mission to me.”

The admission is so soft I can’t help but smile. “I know, Anakin, we’re--”

“You’re more than a friend to me.” I don’t know if my blood freezes in my veins or if my lungs don’t contract when they should or if my heart literally skips a beat, but I know something in me completely stops at his words. “I--”

“Don’t say it.” I don’t know how I managed to cut him off so sharply and I’m a little disappointed when I do, but it’s the right thing to do. Thought of the code that’s so important to him have clouded half the immense shock and joy swelling in my chest. “What you’re trying to say...I um, I want to say the same.” I try to drop my gaze but he tilts my head up slightly with his hand. “But we shouldn’t, you know that.”

"You want to us to pretend that nothing’s different? You want me to escort you from meetings with one suitor to the next every Coronation Season until you’re married off?”

“No, I’m not saying that. The point is that I’m not saying anything.” His eyebrows draw together in uncertainty. “Isn’t it enough for now, for both of us to just know? If we say it...that could mean bad things for you. And I don’t want to be a bad thing for you.”

“You could never be.”

It’d be so easy to believe him. To believe him and to let him say what I never imagined I’d be able to hear and damn the consequences of tomorrow. “Can we just refrain from verbally saying anything until you’re sure?”

“I’m sure right now. I’ve been sure since the first time we ever walked in the garden together. The night after the first Coronation Ball I escorted you to.”

I remember that night well. The way he hadn’t scolded me for needing air or taking off my uncomfortably high heels to walk in the grass. “If you mean it, you won’t say it yet. I refuse to get in the way of what you’re meant for.”

His thumb runs my cheek entirely, stopping at the corner of my mouth. “Are you capable of not disagreeing with me?”

Rolling my eyes slightly, I place my hand over his. “Probably not.”

Anakin exhales, his playful irritation clear in the sound. “You’re impossible when you’re tired.”

“I am not tired.”

“I can see the sleep in your eyes.”

“I can see it in yours too.”

He pauses, eyebrows drawn together cautiously. “I’ll go to sleep if you do.”

He must be more tired than I thought if he’s compromising with me so quickly. “Deal.”

Neither of us close our eyes for a long second, we just watch each other with wide eyes. It still doesn’t feel like he’s eased, but he’s come back to me so much more than he was earlier. I’ll make sure to check how he’s feeling in the morning. The first morning after we’ve...I don’t know.

I’m trying really hard not to get excited because anything that’s been not said could be taken back so easily. That’s the point--but it’s hard not to let my heart get ahead of my rationality. I’ll just take the good for what it is for now and tomorrow we can figure out the rest. Even though he’s not allowed to form attachments and my father really wants to marry me off to foreign royalty.

Tomorrow. This can begin to be solved tomorrow. My eyes shut and I let myself roll fully onto my back. The second I’m comfortably settled, I feel Anakin shift against the bed. I’m too tired to open my eyes until I feel a weight placed against my chest.

I open my eyes on instinct, less surprised than I should be when I see Anakin’s head resting against my chest. Before I can speak, I feel his arm rest against my side. “Anakin,” I breathe, my hand moving to smooth his hair out of his face the way I’ve wanted to for so long. “What did we just talk about?”

“You said not to say anything,” he mumbles comfortably, “I’m not saying anything.” ...It is kind of the ideal compromise. Especially since I’m too tired to find reason and he feels so warm. “I can feel you overthinking. Go back to smoothing my hair before I have to rise and stand at your door so that your handmaid comes to wake you. Something tells me she’d be glad for the excuse to get rid of me.”

That might be the most dramatic thing I’ve ever heard him say. Selma is the most patient woman in the palace. “Selma would never report anything involving me, I can’t believe you don’t like her. She’s the sweetest woman I’ve ever met.”

“She’s the one that doesn’t like me,” he says, “she always watches me like she’s trying to figure out if I’m planning on stealing you away.”

Too tired to fight my smile, I go back to smoothing his hair out with my fingers. After a moment, he lets out an exhale that relaxes his entire body. “Goodnight, princess.”

“Goodnight.” The word is barely a mumble as I feel sleep tug against me for the second time tonight.

It’s strange, but my excitement doesn’t diminish my tiredness, it just makes the prospect of rest feel so much fuller. Safer. Because there’s so much to sort out and grieve but it’s okay, because we have the time and everything feels okay because Anakin is here, right beneath my fingertips.

#anakin skywalker #anakin #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin x reader #anakin x you #anakin skywalker imagine #anakin skywalker x you #anakin skywalker x y/n #star wars #star wars x reader #star wars imagine #star wars imagines #star wars fic

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alienaiver · 2 years

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Chapter II: On dubious foods and fireworks

Chapter summary: Successful in your mission to claim Shinsou as an important part of your life, your friendship flourishes. The flow of the waves consumes you both as you learn to navigate the compass of feelings.

warnings for this chapter: there’s a panic attack described in this chapter, it starts at the paragraph, “He tells you of his experiences…” and it’s done by the paragraph, “After he’s successfully breathed slowly for a few minutes..”, don’t hesitate to let me know if i’ve missed anything else!

wordcount: 12.3k words

chapter content: fluff, mild angst, gender neutral reader, best friends pining, one-sided pining (theyre both DORKS it is so mutual it hurts), typical teenage insecurities, shitty communication, humor and friendly bickering between friends, CANON DIVERGENT FROM THIS POINT basically, second year at u.a!, reader gives shinsou a semi-expensive gift and says their parents helped fund it - can be read as a lie to make shinsou accept, though! notes: OH BOY. this chapter is BIG ONE! i really hope you like it, AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YALLS SUPPORT ON CHAPTER 1<3333 im so overwhelmed by the love! again, the next and final chapter will be posted next sunday and all i can promise is that the wordcount is even higher for ch3 IEFHSJFS ilysm<3

quick note for anime only readers: this story has become canon DIVERGENT from the school festival and on and therefor anything that happens in this chapter (and forth) doesn’t align with what is currently going on, will happen or have happened in the manga past that point! it is simply me coming up with an alternate continuation so you will not get spoiled if you’ve only caught up in the anime<3 mwuah, happy reading!

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Shinsou’s heart is beating faster than he thinks is healthy, clenching the strap of his backpack to the point where it’d definitely leave a permanent crease. This is good, really good. He tries to take another breath to steel himself but ultimately ends up choking on air – great, and of course today of all days. So here he’s standing, in the hallway of his high school, choking on air. He feels the weight of a hand on his shoulder and looks to his left. His teacher and mentor, Aizawa stands with a smile on his face, “it’s going to be okay.” He looks back at the door, had he really been standing here for so long?

Shinsou clears his throat one last time before he takes his first step into his new class, Hero Department’s Class 2-A. On the other side of the threshold you stand with barely contained excitement. Homeroom’s about to start and behind you the whole class is waiting as well. The second he’s in the classroom it starts ringing with cheers and it seems like Yaoyorozu has produced confetti for the occasion, ultimately overwhelming Shinsou on the spot from the sheer excitement of his classmates. They’re not just friends anymore but classmates and if he later denies there were tears in his eyes, you don’t dispute him. His seat is between Kaminari and Tokoyami and after he’s settled down he looks anxiously around the classroom, searching for you – as if he wouldn’t be able to really calm down unless he spots you in the same classroom as him. You send him a wave and your dumb finger guns with a wink before Aizawa starts the class.

Outside, the cherry blossom trees are doing their work at being pink and beautiful and while eating your lunch outside in spring looks very pleasing it ends up very annoying and very good at interrupting every conversation Shinsou tries to have with his best friend because said best friend is too busy laughing and joking about them landing in the food. You’d asked Lunch Rush to make Yakisoba Noodles like they serve them at festivals after Shinsou had confessed he’d never tried traditional festival dishes. The outrage you’d felt surprised Shinsou who simply admitted that going to festivals hadn’t really been his home’s thing and you promise to bring him to one in the summer. “Aizawa came up to me after homeroom,” you tell him between bites and he waits for your continuation, “thanked me for supporting you in reaching your goal and uh. If I’d want to help you study in the beginning as you get used to the extra period and stuff.” You slurp up some noodles and Shinsou smiles, “I don’t mean to dunk on you but you’re not even like… one of the smartest people in the class.” And the kick he receives underneath the table doesn’t surprise him. He's about to ask if you’d want to plan those… study dates? You probably wouldn’t call them dates, he thinks when suddenly Kaminari throws his arms around him from behind, “yer eating lunch without me? That’s so rude!”

You offer him noodles since you both have them an abundance, Lunch Rush giving Shinsou two extra thumbs-ups upon giving him his food, obviously letting him celebrate his transfer to the Hero Course. Before Kaminari’s really settled and part of the conversation more classmates come running, invading the table you’d sat on. You look excited and Shinsou feels excited because he’s a part of this now, he’s not just an outsider looking in. While joining the Hero Department has been his ultimate goal, he can’t deny the giddiness he feels upon sharing classes with you. He rests his head in his palm and gives himself a few seconds to just stare at your face before he joins in on the conversation.

Well fuck.

Shinsou lets his hands run down his face, dragging his cheeks with him as he groans. Granted, he hadn’t ever been in love before and hadn’t had many friends so he could be entirely off base but… the feeling that’d rushed through him when you’d told him that he was your hero? That couldn’t be good for anyone’s heart to hear. He turns around in the bed a few times, trying to let the restlessness leave his body but to no avail so he jumps up from the bed, walking in circles. It’s fine, he didn’t have a crush on you. Did he? He couldn’t have! You were his best friend! He feels giddy and even through the sheer panic, can’t stop himself from laughing out loud at the absurdness of it all. While he fears the emotions he might be feeling right now, he can’t deny the absolute happiness that’s now emerging from being referred to as ‘your hero’, romantic feelings or not. He hides his face in his hands, willing the blush to disappear. If he’d had trouble sleeping before calling you, he’ll struggle even more now. When his phone lights up in the dark room he instantly goes to grab it. You’ve sent him a snap. He opens it with shaky hands, almost afraid he’d accidentally press on the screen again and miss the message. It’s a picture of your room that is otherwise dark besides the string lights you’ve adorned the windows with, the text asking him if he’s sure he’s okay.

He sucks in a breath as the snap time runs out, knowing he has to reply now that you can see he’s opened it. Taking a picture of his equally dark room with no string lights, he shakily writes out a yeah sorry, I just think I can finally sleep. He feels bad for lying to you, he really does as he realizes this may be one of the very first times he’s done it.

He panics and shuffles through your interactions from you met until now and can’t come up with any lies and his heartrate spikes, friends don’t lie, right? He realizes he’s spiraling again, like you’d told him on the phone, but for an entirely different reason now. He lets himself fall back on the mattress, controlling his breathing like you usually make him do. “it’s fine, there’s literally no problem. You don’t have to date the person you’re crushing on – you’re probably just confusing your feelings. Crushes disappear, it’s probably hormones! Yep, definitely hormones.”

He isn’t sure who he’s trying to convince because it definitely doesn’t work on himself, not at all. He checks his phone again; you’ve opened the snap three minutes ago but haven’t replied and a lovesick smile plays on his features before he can fully register that he’s doing it. You’re making sure not to disturb his fragile sleep so you leave him be and that’s just really on brand for you – always taking care of him somehow. A sigh leaves him – one that suspiciously sounds like something coming from a Disney princess in love but he decides not to dwell on it, he’d probably just spiral again. He puts his phone on the nightstand and turns around to face the wall. It's okay, he thinks. Forcing his eyes shut he wraps his blanket around him and does yet another breathing exercise you’ve once taught him.

Shinsou’s spent the winter getting used to his… new-found feelings, for you. Training himself to not blush and stammer, cursing himself for not being able to use his quirk on himself. The first week after his realization, you’d been convinced he was sick and kept trying to send him to the infirmary – he’d even obliged one time to make you stop fretting and touching his forehead, which had ended in a very humiliating conversation with Recovery Girl after you’d left for class and she’d ultimately become the first one to know about his feelings.

So now that he’s starting his new life in the 2-A’s dorm, he’s determined to make the most of it. He’s trying on different shirts for tonight, unsure what to go with. When classes were finished for the day, half of his classmates had faked tiredness, putting on a variety of convincing and not-so-convincing behaviors, telling him they’d stay in their rooms for the rest of the day and the common area should stay empty and quiet. In a not-so-subtle way Bakugou had told him to stay the fuck away from the common area and kitchen, making several of them groan out loud and chastise him. You, however, you’d been the worst at keeping the secret, spilling it before he was even aware there was a secret to tell.

“Act surprised when you come to dinner tomorrow! They’re throwing you a welcome party!”

They way you’d said it made it sound like you wanted him to believe that the others were the ones arranging this but Shinsou wasn’t blind to the fact that you’d probably come up with the whole idea. There’s a knock on his door and since he’s convinced that it’s you when he opens, he’s surprised when it’s Kaminari, “that’s really not a happy look bro, is it that disappointing to see me instead?” Shinsou sends him a confused look to which Kaminari groans in mock irritation and says your name.

“Dude, you’re very obvious, holy fuck.” Kaminari states as he shuts Shinsou’s door behind him and ignores the way Shinsou’s world crumbles – did everyone know? Did he need to do damage control? Did you know? “I figured you had a crisis with shirts though,” he smirks knowingly upon seeing the shirts on the floor strewn around the mirror, Shinsou feels a blush reach his ears but also narrows his eyes at his lightning friend, “how do you just… know that?”

Kaminari winks at him, “a gentleman never reveals his secrets!” He then proceeds to pick up the shirts from the floor, muttering disapprovingly to some of them and raising the ones he might accept a little higher. Shinsou can’t help but raise a very suspicious eyebrow at his friend but also can’t deny that the help isn’t entirely unwelcome – no matter how… weird, the circumstance is. So, he swallows his pride and walks over to Kaminari whose upper body is currently inside Shinsou’s closet, searching through his clothes.

“Is it true that I’m… obvious?” he asks, holding his hands in front of him, playing with them. Kaminari snorts from inside the closet before coming out with a dress shirt Shinsou had forgot he even owned, “dude, I love you and I’m sorry to be the one to tell you but yeah you are.” Shinsou clicks his tongue and looks at the floor, “how many… knows?” he fights out through his teeth, frustration evident in both his voice and face. Kaminari puts a reassuring hand on his shoulder and Shinsou feels himself calm down just a little bit just from the gesture alone, “they don’t know, if you’re worried about that,” Kaminari smiles before pulling out a shirt with the left hand that had still been inside the closet, “but I think you’d woo them if you wore this!”

Shinsou can’t help but groan, turning around with his arms raised, “I’m never asking for your help again!”

It’s a shirt he owns that has way more affectional value than anything else and he’s only keeping it because it was the going-away gift he got from the two younger kids at the foster home – they’d carefully picked it out in purple for him and wrapped it in the newspapers from prior weeks. They’d been so excited and jittery and sad and every other feeling Shinsou could imagine the day he moved to the dorms and the only time he’d worn the shirt was when he came to visit them one time during the winter holidays. He likes the shirt for what it symbolizes, containing the love and memories for him and he'll probably never get rid of it, however, he’ll be caught dead before he wears it for any other occasion.

It's a My Little Pony t-shirt.

And Shinsou doesn’t even know the name of the Goddamn horse on it, just knows that they had picked it because it matched his hair. He knows the implications of owning something like that and he rubs his eyes, feeling a headache arrive just from the thought of having to explain it to Kaminari. Why did he let Kaminari rummage his closet again? Kaminari’s laughing hysterically behind him and he’s got half a mind to ignore him until he hears the recognizable shutter sound from a phone camera, turning around as fast as he’s able as he’s ripping the shirt from his hands, “it was a gift,” he mumbles, sounding grumpier than he actually is to get the point across that Kaminari should leave it be. He hadn’t really… advertised his family situation to anyone but you and he isn’t in the mood for questions. Kaminari stammers out an apology and salutes Shinsou, before sticking his head back into the closet. Shinsou chuckles but lets him do whatever as he gently folds the shirt nicely, placing it by his hamper.

Kaminari settles on a sweater for him, ignoring the protests Shinsou’s got about temperatures. “I don’t want to hear it, bro! You look stunning in that sweater and it’s your night!” he argues back and the pat he was giving Shinsou on the back ends abruptly midway, as he realizes his mistake. “I mean! Uh! It’s just a regular night, of course! It’s just the first dinner for this semester, it’s nothing big!” Kaminari wheezes out in a panic and Shinsou decides not to let him suffer further, “don’t worry, I already know.”

Kaminari grabs his chest and sighs in relief, “I am so glad to hear that, my guy, I did not want to be the person who spoiled this.” And Shinsou decides not to snitch about who did. Though it’d have given him a funny story if he knew that you were the one who’d insisted on it being a secret.

As he sits down by the end of the table as the celebratory guest (he’s never felt this awkward or on display before), you go to him with a plate – it looks dubious at best, what’s on it, but Shinsou recognizes it to be Tentamadon – which he’d told you was his favorite dish once – or at least, it’s an attempt of it, if he’s to describe it more accurately. It’s charred and the smell isn’t how it’s supposed to be and the way you emit both embarrassment and disappointment makes him think that it’s your doing and his heart swells in his chest from the thought of you doing this for him. You put the plate in front of him and stammer out a half-hearted introduction and excuse for why it looks like it does. The whole class is sitting by the table too with bated breath, not entirely sure what to do – do they hurt your feelings or do they let Shinsou suffer through eating it?

Shinsou thanks you for the meal and digs in instantly, taking several bites before your hands go to his face, “Shinsou please, you really don’t have to eat it!” you try but as he swallows his bite he smiles at you, “it’s a bit different than what I’m used to but honestly, it tastes fine.”

Bakugou rises from his seat to yell at Shinsou, “it tastes and looks like shit, motherfucker! Don’t fucking lie!” walking up to him. You try to stop him and Shinsou looks at him calmly, “it tastes fine, no lie.” And the entire class goes pale because they’d all taste tested it for you, knowing that gunk on the plate was questionable – you were supposed to let it simmer but got impatient. You hold back Bakugou as he punches the table, “if I ever catch you lying to the pipsqueak you’re fucking dead, got that!?”

Shinsou simply takes another bite of the food while he keeps eye contact with Bakugou, “I’m not lying, Bakugou, I wouldn’t lie to my best friend.” Bakugou huffs, lets out a “fuckin’ good,” before going back to his seat. Kirishima stands up and tries to lighten the mood by introducing the rest of the food on the table, and everyone cheers and welcomes Shinsou once again, raising their glasses while nodding at him

You’re sitting out on the balcony when Shinsou comes out with a blanket, “you cold?” he asks and you shake your head – it doesn’t stop you from cuddling up to him though, when he sits down next to you. His hands clench at his sides but that’s the only noticeable reaction to your proximity.

“I’m sorry you had to eat that,” you sigh out after a comfortable silence and you hear him chuckle, “I’m really not lying when I said it tasted fine – my tastebuds are a bit messed up, so I go by textures and the texture was how it was supposed to be,” he reassures you and you scoff, “at least some part of it turned out right…”

Shinsou raises his hand from his side and squeezes the hand resting on your thigh and you tense up, “it was the best thing on the entire table.”

You want to dispute him; want to remind him that Sato had made an entire butter roasted chicken that was cooked to perfection and that Bakugou had served homemade Katsudon for 20 people without even breaking a sweat. He laughs and sucks in a breath, “you’re right, there was tough competition,” he teases and the way you lightly punch him makes him sigh out, “I appreciate all the food everyone made, but yours was still the best because you made it for me.”

That shuts you up. You’re not sure how to dispute that so you stay quiet, silently letting your hand travel to his that’s now resting on his own thigh, mirroring his action from before and he’s too nervous to say anything.

“Besides, the rice underneath were how they were supposed to be,” Shinsou adds in hopes it’ll comfort you but you groan, “Bakugou made the rice.”

You sit and suck in each other’s presence, both exhausted from the party tonight – half the class was playing Mario Party while the other was dueling in Ludo, of all things. Either way, the stakes were high inside and the peace and quiet of the outside – coupled with the comfortable temperature of a warm spring evening – puts you both in a lazy mood and Shinsou doesn’t even realize that his hand is caressing yours, his thumb brushing back and forth in a mindless pattern next to your wrist as he sneaks in a whiff of your shampoo.

He's looking forward to the future he’d dreamt of for so long, finally kickstarting his hero career properly and while he’d always believed he wasn’t there to make friends – maybe you and the rest of the chaotic class he’d become part of wasn’t so bad to have as company.

You’re in your bed with your head hanging from the edge, phone raised in your hands and legs propped up against the wall. Shinsou had just sent one of those Bitmoji pictures you could send in the chat, of his character saying goodnight to yours, tucked in a bed. You can’t help the smile that splays on your lips, laughing at his use of the Bitmoji things – though he’d assured you he’d never touch them even if you did make him one – well he’s eating his words, as his favorite pastime now, when you’re both too tired to think straight after long days, send them to each other and almost have a conversation through them – almost.

goodnight

i love you

You stare at the screen for a while, unable to lock your phone or close the app – you want to know the exact time he sees it. His little Bitmoji pops up in the corner to alert you that he’s in your chat and you hold your breath. He stays in the chat but isn’t typing and you feel a headache creeping it, maybe it hadn’t been the right time or place for this after all? His Bitmoji disappears and you release the breath. You’re about to leave the chat too when he comes back on and saves the message. You stay on and notice that he does this, leaving and entering a few more times and you end up snorting to yourself at him – you can’t help but imagine him panicking in his room right now. He starts typing a few times but leaves the chat or stops inter frequently and when he leaves the chat for well over 30 seconds, you’re about to let your phone lock itself automatically and put it on the bed in front of you. The screen goes dark and you’re instantly enveloped in the darkness of your room – your usual source of light, the string lights, needed new batteries – finally feeling calm enough to let out a big sigh. When your phone suddenly lights up again with Shinsou’s picture and ringtone you let out a surprised yelp and push the phone further away from you.

You take a deep breath before lifting it again, hovering above the answer button. You lift a knee as far as you’re able towards your chest and hide your face by your knee as you answer and put the phone to your ear, your heart beating out of your chest.

“Y-yeah?”

You squeak at your own tone of voice, embarrassed by the high-pitched sound – you feel like it’s way too obvious how nervous you are.

You chastise yourself for sounding so dumb, clenching the fist that rests on your other side. He says your name and sounds so breathless that you feel a shiver run down your spine. A silence follows where you’re unsure if he’s still on the line. You hear him clear his throat not once but twice before he speaks again,

“That last message.” He states, like a matter of fact but does nothing to follow it up afterwards and you get to draw four whole circles with your finger into your thigh before he speaks again, “was that… meant for me?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?” you screech, trying to sound as casual as you can be, your hand slapping your forehead, reprimanding yourself for sounding like a timid mouse. You wince before opening your mouth again, effectively interrupting him without realizing it, “you’re my best friend and… I thought you ought to know already.” It’s the most confident you’ve sounded all week, you think.

“Oh.”

Oh.

That didn’t sound good, you thought, there goes that confidence. Your stomach drops and you let out a sigh, “I can… I can take it back if that… If I made you uncomfortable.”

“No!”

The volume of the word is so loud that you tear your phone away from your ear in shock, hearing him heave out a rather dramatic sigh, “it’s just. I’ve never…” he clicks his tongue, “I haven’t… tried… I-“ he interrupts himself with a loud groan, annoyed at himself for being unable to find the right words, “it’s just that I haven’t had any…” and he stops himself again as if he’s biting his tongue, biting back words he might regret and collects himself for a moment. He then clears his throat, “you’re really important to me too.”

The weight of his original words doesn’t go over your head though and your stomach drops even further at the realization of what they entailed. You aren’t unaware of his family situation or the bullying he’d gone through, you just hadn’t realized… how alone he’d really been, until this moment. When you don’t say anything he starts apologizing profusely and a smile is teetering on the edge of your lips as you try your hardest to ignore the way your hands are still shaking, “don’t apologize Shinsou! You loooooooove me,” you drawl out the last sentence and he groans, “stop teasing me.” You laugh at him before flopping down on your back, looking up at the ceiling where Shinsou had put up glow in the dark stars for you, after you’d seen them in the mall once, saying you’d always wanted to have those.

“I do,” he then says after a few seconds silence and you feel your own face heat up and your mouth go dry. Hearing him confirm it solidifies something in you that’d previously been an ocean, something stirring in you as you let out another nervous chuckle, “thanks,” is all you’re able to get out and he yawns.

“I should get to bed, I promised to go by the Support Department before classes tomorrow, they’ve made some tweaks to my bombs,” as you near the end of the sentence the excitement in your voice grows even clearer and Shinsou laughs, “you know, it sounds entirely unsafe to give a mess like you bombs.”

After some back and forth bickering to lighten the mood from earlier, you say your goodnights, and you both fall asleep with content smiles on your faces.

“Have you ever been in love?” Shinsou lowers the Hero’s News! Magazine he’s currently reading in the bed next to you to show he’s listening, turning his head towards you, “where’s this coming from?” he answers your question with another, making you click your tongue. He further lowers the magazine, hoping the shaking in his hands isn’t too obvious as he tastes his next words on his tongue, “I don’t think so. Have you?” he lies, lies through his teeth because if he had had the courage to say yes, he’d have to gather courage to tell you who it was as well – and he wouldn’t ever be ready for that, he decides as he keeps his eyes fixated on the ceiling. You hum as you pick on your nail polish – it’s purple, the same color and shade as Shinsou’s hair. “I mean, I had a crush when I was younger? I think?” you lay your hands down on your stomach, “could just be admiration or superficial though.” you finish, before you huff out a laugh and lay on your side, so that you face Shinsou – the close proximity almost making him choke. “It was Bakugou! In elementary school!” you look embarrassed as you try to laugh it off, resting your head on your arm. “Could just be his looks, though. He’s a pain in the ass,” you muse, starting to pick on the nail polish again. If Shinsou wasn’t six foot deep in his own brain about how your type of course had to be a guy like Bakugou – someone so far from himself, he’d have noticed the way you bit your lip and picked on the nail polish. You always did both things when you were incredibly nervous or anxious. A thick silence stretches out until you suddenly spring up and stretch your arms towards the ceiling, “I’ll be going down to make a cup of coffee, you wanna come?” you ask as you put on the hoodie you’d thrown on his floor earlier. Shinsou lets out a sigh of relief he wasn’t even aware he was holding in as he picks up the magazine again, “nah, my social battery’s low,” he states and you hum in understanding, “I’ll stop by when it’s dinnertime, then.” And as you close his door behind you, a sigh leaves you as your hand reaches for your chest. This is one of the first times you’ve ever lied directly to him and it pricks at your heart, the roots growing thorns as you try to justify it – it wasn’t fair to lie but it had been harmless right? Since his answer had been negative, it didn’t matter either way, right? You shake your head as to try and shake the thoughts out of your mind and walk towards the elevator to get to the common room.

It's the first of July and you’re in the common area’s kitchen, making a pancake batter. Next to you, Bakugou is yelling his head off about how you cracked the eggs wrong, you put in too much flour, you forgot to melt the butter and his reprimanding is never ending. You’re very aware that this is on you though, for asking him to help you out at 8AM on a Saturday. Half of your classmates are home for the summer vacation and while you are going home soon too, for a week or two, you’d insisted on staying for Shinsou’s birthday. Your aunt used to always make pancakes for you on your birthday when you were younger and you wanted him to feel special like that, too. As Bakugou’s once again yelling at you, this time for whisking it wrong you groan at him and hand him the bowl, “show me how, then!” you insist and he begrudgingly takes it from your hands before proceeding to whisk it so violently you’re not sure there’ll be any batter left.

“Dumbass, you gotta get the flour clumps out! They taste fucking terrible!”

You nod and start putting some of the ingredients back in the fridge, deciding that he’s probably the safest bet for a good batter. As you wipe down the counter, a voice makes both you and Bakugou turn your heads,

“What’s going on here?”

It’s Shinsou. Shinsou in an oversized shirt, a pair of joggers that hang dangerously low on his waist and the only reason you know that is because he’s currently got an arm inside his shirt, letting it ride up and reveal skin. You feel heat rise to your face as you run to hide Bakugou behind you – or more accurately, the batter in his arms. You momentarily get distracted by how groggy Shinsou looks – completely debauched and dazed, like he isn’t really awake yet. “Good morning!” you try and he laughs, a real lazy laugh with not much effort as he takes in the kitchen, “you’re making breakfast without me? You could’ve just woke me up,” he says and you swear you and Bakugou have never looked dumber than you do right now, all wide-eyed with raised brows.

“Pipsqueak, did you get the date wrong?” Bakugou whispers behind you and you turn around and yell “of course not! It’s July 1st and it’s his birthday today!”

You both freeze, Bakugou raising his head to the left to see Shinsou’s reaction behind you. You hear him chuckle and the fridge door close as you comically slow turn around to face him. He’s blushing but avoiding your gaze, a nervous smile on his lips as he scratches the back of his neck, “I don’t really… celebrate my birthday,” he gets out and Bakugou kicks your shin, probably as a reprimand for doing all this when he didn’t even want it. You click your tongue as your arms go to your hips, “that’s all well and good Shinsou but in that case, I wanna celebrate this day!”

“Why?” he looks at you in confusion but with a gentle smile still plastered on his face you’re reminded how soft he can be in the morning. “Because it’s the day my best friend got born – I’m glad you’re here, you know.”

You go in for a hug as you say the last part and Shinsou doesn’t struggle against it but stands frozen. In the background you hear Bakugou gag as he aggressively puts down the bowl, “I’m outta here then, all that’s left is cooking them, which your boyfriend can help you with.”

You sputter out a string of sounds, meant to be protests but coherent words fail to leave your mouth before he’s rounded the corner and left the kitchen.

“Even though I made enough for him as well, as a thank you…” you mutter weakly and Shinsou puts the kettle on while laughing at you, “I’m sure you can leave some in the fridge that he’ll crawl back and grab like a grumpy gremlin later.”

Making pancakes with Shinsou is chaotic, you’re disagreeing on how much butter there’s supposed to go on the pan but end up settling on Shinsou’s due to the argument that you’d rather want them a bit greasy than burned to the pan. More than once you forget them because you’re caught up in talking about something – boring things like classes and homework but also about TV shows and movies and even though you settled for extra butter, they still get burned. You save three of the best ones for Bakugou (since you’d probably never hear the end of it if you served him the burned ones) and put them in a wrapped plate with his name on it before putting them in the fridge.

“What if someone takes them? That isn’t him?” Shinsou asks and you look at him with a smirk, “as if anyone dares take anything with Bakugou’s name on it – he’d fry them.”

You set the table out by the balcony – the one in shade – and start eating.

“They taste amazing,” Shinsou says almost mechanically and you look at him with a raised brow, “I can tell when you’re lying.”

He chokes on a piece of pancake before gathering himself, “they really do!”

“there’s something off, though,” you try and he looks away, looking guilty, “oh my God, there is! What is it?”

Shinsou stabs the pancake a few times with his fork before he’s able to say it out loud, “…I actually don’t really like… pancakes.” You’ve never seen him look this guilty in his life and even though he just confessed, he takes another bite with vigor. You stand to reach for his plate from your side of the table, “don’t eat them when you’ve just confessed you don’t like them!” and effortlessly he grabs the plate with one hand and puts it back down in front of him, “but you made them for me and it’d be a waste, plus… they probably do taste great, if you like them.”

He says the last part with a glint in his eye and you groan at him before sitting back down, hiding your face in your hands, “everything we do today really is just for me, eh?” you complain. Shinsou chuckles and reaches a hand to yours, “thank you so much though,” he says genuinely and it sounds so heartwarming that you’re afraid of looking up, the place where you’re touching is burning as if you’re too close to the sun. As you finally look up at him, he’s sporting such a warm and glowing smile that for a moment you really do believe you’re next to the sun, blinded by the clear affection radiating off of him.

“Here’s your gift, happy birthday” you say meekly, handing the nicely wrapped present to him as you avoid his gaze. If you knew he wasn’t interested in celebrating his birthday, you wouldn’t have gone through all this trouble, you think.

Or maybe you would’ve anyway, since you can’t deny that you think he deserves the world and you’d been looking forward to celebrating him for so long now. You’d saved up for his present ever since he told you his birthday was in the summer – last fall. That’s when you’d fallen over the present as you’d been at the mall with your classmates.

Shinsou looks at the perfectly wrapped square with a matching ribbon. It’s not a big box by any means so he’s guessing you might’ve gotten him a keychain or something of that sort. He can feel the excitement rolling off of you in waves next to him on the couch and when he looks up at you again, there’s stars in your eyes as you urge him to open it.

He laughs at you as he carefully unpicks the tape, reluctant to ruin the wrapping paper even though he wouldn’t save it. A gasp escapes him as he gets a look at the box. It’s a leather box with a golden inscription. He doesn’t recognize the name but just from the feel of it, he’s well aware that this is expensive.

It’s not a keychain.

He clicks open the clasp and is met with a sleek, black ring. It’s thick with the edges being a matted silver. He looks up at you in disbelief and your childish wonder as your eyes asks if he likes the gift is almost making him groan because he could not accept this – no way in hell will he ever be able to repay you for this. His mouth opens and closes and he resembles a fish stuck on land – he feels he does that quite often when it comes to you, before a sound leaves him, though it resembles no words, only making it that much clearer that he’s downright flabbergasted. Before he gets anything more out, you close your eyes and yell, “before you say anything!”

You correct your volume before you continue, “I want you to have this! I know it’s probably way over budget for a friend gift but I want you to have it!” you repeat it with fervor, afraid to look at him in case he’ll still reject it. “If you feel bad about the price, don’t!” you add, your hands traveling to his that is still holding the box. You notice that he’s shaking a little bit, “my parents helped a bit…” you admit sheepishly and while he can’t explain it, it helps just a little bit – but not much. He closes the box again and is about to give it to you before you get up from the couch, “no, Shinsou! It's yours and that’s final!”

He can’t describe the look you give him but it’s got the ‘no bullshit’ attitude he often sees in Aizawa so he shuts his mouth and nods. You then kneel before him and open the box again, taking out the ring. He barely registers what you’re doing until you grab his hand to put it on him, “shit I hope it fits,” you mumble as you concentrate. It isn’t until it’s on him that you both seem to grasp what it is you look like right now. He blushes as he unintentionally rips his hand from yours and you stand up so fast you get dizzy.

You’re in Shinsou’s room, watching a random show. You can’t even name it if held at gunpoint because your focus is on something else entirely. Shinsou’s body is currently closer to yours than it’s ever been, his arm wrapped securely around your waist. He’s propped on his elbow so he can see the laptop screen too and every breath he releases sends shivers down your spine and goosebumps on your nape. Your body burns at every point of contact with his and you’ve been trying to even your breathing since the episode started but you’re failing miserably. Your heartbeat is over a million miles per hour and you’re convinced he can feel it, too – just because he’s quiet doesn’t mean he haven’t picked up on it. It’s the first time you’ve ever cuddled and it’s only because you had another late-night snapchat conversation where you’d been hit by some kind of insomniac bravery and sent a snap about needing cuddles last week. He’d countered about the heat of cuddling in summer and you’d replied that if it was in his room, it wouldn’t be a problem since he had A/C installed (as if every room didn’t have A/C).

As you try to focus your eyes on the screen at least, you’re sent right back to Rapid Heartbeat Land as he buries his face in your hair and asks, “you okay?”

Your eyes go to the hand on your waist and you spot the ring you’d put on his finger earlier, sucking in a breath, “just swell!” He chuckles, low and warm and you can feel the way his chest rumbles from it, the way his chest rises and falls and you have to hold back a gasp, “just tell me if you’d like to sit up instead, alright?” he says and you just nod, grateful he can’t see your expression from behind you. There’s nothing calm about it and you don’t want to freak him out or make him think you dislike being his little spoon – especially since it’s quite the opposite.

You spend the rest of his birthday like this and even though Shinsou’s arm has been asleep and prickling for at least two hours and he’s dead tired, thinks to himself that if he got attacked by a villain right now and his life ended, he’d die a happy man. Shinsou’s always tired, but never of you, he decides as he stifles a yawn and hugs you tighter.

Shinsou’s waiting down in the common area, unable to stand or sit still. Midoriya’s laughing at him from the couch where he’s playing Ludo with Uraraka and Iida, “I’m telling you Shinsou, it’s going to be fine!” he reassures the nervous wreck of a boy. Uraraka chimes in with a similar encouragement but Shinsou has already tuned them out merely because you’re coming into the room. You’re glowing and smiling as your step speeds up upon seeing him wait for you, “sorry for the wait!” you say as you go in for a hug. Summer vacation is almost over and you’re going to a festival together which, in Shinsou’s mind, feels like a date – ever since he had that thought, he hasn’t been able to stop the train of thoughts and implications of a possible date with you.

You smile up at him before raising your arm, “ready to go?” you joke, playing as a gentleman but he’s much too nervous to reply back with a bite.

When you arrive at the festival, Shinsou looks around with wide eyes. There’re so many lights that it seems the stars have fallen from the skies and landed on this spot of earth, illuminating the festival in an otherworldly glow – momentarily reminding him of the glow in the dark stars he’d hung up on your ceiling not too long ago.

He’s dragged around the different booths and when you eat Takoyaki together, he almost spills the sauce on the fancy dress shirt he’d borrowed from Kaminari because you’d insisted that he try one with lots of sauce on it. The evening is drowning in laughter and Shinsou’s having such a good time that he forgets to keep an eye on the clock. After winning you a plushie from a booth (it was more luck than skill, he reasons when he hands it to you) you walk around with a grin on your face for the rest of the evening. It isn’t until you’re resting on a bench that he feels tiredness grow in his bones. You take off your shoes for a second to massage them, tender from walking around all evening. A yawn escapes you as you come back up and rest your head on his shoulder, “should we go home?” he asks and you raise your head in alarm, “we can’t miss the fireworks!” you say desperately and he chuckles at the excitement written all over your face, “they always go all out! So it’s really beautiful, even if it is kinda noisy,” you smile and play with your fingers on your lap. He apologizes for daring to suggest going home early and you bicker back and forth until you get up and stretch your back, “let’s find a good spot!”

Admittedly, Shinsou doesn’t care much for fireworks – he’s not entirely sure you do either, but he respects the tradition. He imagines you as a child walking with your parents at these festivals you hold so dear and your pouty face by the game booths if you didn’t win, he imagines your eyes and the way they’d sparkle during the firework show. He takes another look at you as you hold the plushie in your arms – it’s a blue cat with an eyepatch. He thinks it’s supposed to resemble a Pro Hero but he can’t place it at all. You decided to call it Brainwave, like his hero name and it took him more than 10 minutes to will down the blush from that action.

You arrive to the grassy area where people watch the show and it’s so crowded that you grab onto Shinsou’s sleeve, guiding him through the masses. You originally wanted a place to sit but it’s so crowded that you settle for standing. Shinsou wants to thank you for a pleasant evening but he can’t really find the words – pleasant sounds too official and professional. He’s about to say something when the first firework shoots up into the sky and catches everyone’s attention, including yours. Instead of the fireworks though, Shinsou hurries to look at you.

And there you stand, admiring the fireworks. Shinsou thinks it’s cute, the way you slightly jump when they’re particularly noisy but still unable to tear your eyes away from the sky. You’re still hanging on to the sleeve of his shirt and if Shinsou was a brave man, he’d raise his arm and make you hold onto him, instead.

But he’s not, so he settles for the next best thing. The excitement in your eyes is evident, even though you’d looked so tired right before the fireworks show started. He notices the way you’ve done your hair just a little bit different than usual and the way your nail polish matches the rest of your outfit. He admires the slope of your nose, the cupid’s bow of your lips and the way your lashes flutter when you blink.

For a minute he’s so lost in you he barely notices the sensation of your hand gently sliding from his sleeve to his own hand, slotting so perfectly together, like they were made for each other, and he squeezes your hand instinctively before his mind can really tell him what he’s doing. It isn’t until you direct your attention to him, sending him a shy smile that he notices that his hand is sweaty and oh my God, it’s holding yours. He’s never ripped his hand away from anything so fast, embarrassed to the core that you had to feel his clammy hands but unfortunately his action sparks up something else from you and he can’t deny the twinge in his chest upon seeing the hurt flash in your face before you’re able to hold it back. “Uh, my-my hands were clammy,” he tries to say, wiping his hand on the side of his shirt – Kaminari’s dress shirt – before reaching out again, “that must’ve felt a bit nasty.”

The relief that washes over you is evident the second he reaches for you and you don’t spare a second before grabbing onto it again, “I like sweaty hands, you know.” You let out before a grimace comes onto your face, clearly embarrassed by that weird statement. Shinsou’s first instinct is to laugh and squeeze your hand, until he remembers that you’ve got a classmate whose entire quirk is sweating from his hands. Shinsou’s not an idiot, he can put two and two together. His grip on you loosens, but not entirely. He decides he still wants to hold onto you for now, just a little, even if you’d never be more than this.

Because how would he ever compare to someone who’s known you your whole life? He’d never catch up, even if he tried, the gap was too wide.

“Did the fireworks overwhelm you?” Shinsou looks at you in shock as you walk back towards the dorms together. “If they did, I’m sorry I insisted that we stay and watched them," you continued and Shinsou is trying to figure out where this is coming from. “There’s no problem?” he tries and bite his lip when your frustrated expression doesn’t change. “I’m sorry… you just seemed off, at the end. I thought we were having fun, but then it suddenly felt like… like you didn’t want to be there?” you end the sentence in a question to give him room to dispute it, to tell you how it really was. When he doesn’t say anything (out of confusion and embarrassment, mostly) you continue, “I just feel bad if the fireworks weren’t your thing and I kinda forced you to stay there.” Shinsou’s insides scream at him for making you feel this way, for being so caught up in his own emotions as to not to consider yours. So he grabs both of your hands and does his best to keep eye contact, “I’m sorry. I was… distracted. But I’m glad we watched the fireworks together.” He tries to smile and sound warm like you, but his voice has always been so gruff, so hoarse that he’s not sure he’s even able to sound warm, or if he just comes off as intense and foreboding. His apology seems to lighten your spirits though, a smile playing on your lips as you start swinging both of your hands side to side.

“I’m glad to hear that, because I had an amazing night, thank you.” you lean in to give him a kiss on the cheek and Shinsou short-circuits for 45 whole seconds before he can bring himself back to reality and act normal. You take your arms back and stretch them above your head, “my feet are busted though, can’t wait to sleep tonight.” Shinsou thinks your voice sounds just slight wobbly, but he’s not entirely sure if it’s the truth or just his mind playing tricks on him after you rewired his brain for the nth time during the year he’s known you.

School has started again, punching you all in the gut with internships and the like. Everyone feels like they’re struggling to keep up but no one admits it and the atmosphere becomes tense and thick with exhaustion all around you. Everyone holds on and try not to complain because this was, after all, their dream.

It makes Shinsou feel alienated. He still feels the gap between his classmates and him and keeping up to their tempo can be endlessly satisfying but more often than not leaves him exhausted – especially when it seems they’re all following suit just fine. Every hour during his internship is spent running, trying to pick up the pieces and keep up. So when the final day of internships are over, he naturally gravitates towards you. He barely has the energy to knock on your door so he just lets his head hit it and rest upon it as he drags his hand up and down in a scratching manner.

You slowly open your door with a curious look on your face, perhaps hoping it’d been a cat scratching to get in. When you see Shinsou, it does however feel like a cat has arrived. He’s fresh out of the shower and in comfortable clothes, leaning forward and almost falling into your arms when you’ve opened the door completely.

You expected him to arrive so you give him a hug and praise him for surviving his first real hero internship as you let your fingers run through his damp hair. He preens at the praise and tip his head to the side, like a cat enjoying scratches.

“You look like how I felt when I survived my first one,” you say while you gently drag him towards your bed – next to your bed, on your small table, a minor celebration is set up. Two canned coffees and a bag of potato chips. His eyes light up like your string lights when he spots your set up and he reminds you of a kitten being put in front a mountain of treats and toys. As he sits down you put a blanket around him before plopping down next to him, handing him a coffee.

You open them in unison again – it feels like you always do that – and raise them in cheers, congratulating each other for surviving. Shinsou feels off somehow but it’s probably due to fatigue so you decide not to push it.

He tells you of his experiences and as he goes into the territory of what he’s got yet to learn, you notice the first crack. It doesn’t take many sentences before his surface splinters and he’s hiding his face in his hands as heart wrenching sobs leave his form, hyperventilating on your floor.

Shinsou doesn’t like to be touched when he’s out of it so you go against your own instinct of wanting to embrace him and start breathing slowly but loudly, asking him to follow your breathing.

“I can’t-“ he gets out through hiccups and gets interrupted by another sob. He looks at you and the clear panic in his eyes hurts so you tell him what usually helps, “it’s okay Shinsou, it’s okay. I know it doesn’t feel like it but you’re amazing. You’re going to do amazing things and you’re not behind anyone. You’re so far ahead sometimes, there’s nothing to worry about. It’s okay.” You try to emphasize every okay that leaves your mouth and it seems to help – if only a fraction. You offer him to go lay in the bed and with shaky breaths he gets up with you and sits on the bed. He takes a deep breath before another sob leaves him and he looks at you, “I think it’d help… if-if you touched, today… I ca-.. I can’t c-calm down,” he says the last part between hiccups and you wipe the tears from his cheeks as you gently push him to lay down, assuring him you’ll be right there with him.

Shinsou runs hot during panic attacks but likes the comfort of being enveloped, so you grab the thin blanket he abandoned on the floor before crawling behind him, securely wrapping your arms around him, cooing into his hair between soft kisses. “It’s okay, Shinsou,” you say and his breathing slows and starts to resemble the one you’re demonstrating for him, only interrupted by sobs and hiccups once in a while. Your hand rubs gentle – and what you hope is soothing – circles into his waist, reminding him of your presence while your leg is lifted above his, effectively wrapped around him like a koala and substituting the weighted blanket that sits on his bed in his own room.

After he’s successfully breathed slowly for a few minutes, he opens his mouth, “I haven’t slept since my internship began… I think even seven hours the past week is high balling it,” he admits and you place another kiss on the crown of his head, “is there a reason?” you ask, though you have a feeling you know the answer – you mostly ask to give him room to open up. A sigh rips through him before he tastes the words in his mouth, “if I slept, I’d fall behind.”

Your hand squeezes his hip, “but you need sleep to function. What you’ve been doing is incredibly exhausting and part of being a good hero is also taking care of your body,” you remind him and he nods. You know he knows this but being reminded once in a while couldn’t hurt. “Wanna sleep a bit here? I can wake you when you need to go back,” you offer as your hand travels from his waist to one of his hands, intertwining your fingers.

After a few beats of silence he clears his throat, “will you keep playing with my hair?” you smile, knowing he had to gather his courage to ask that, so you suppress a giggle and rake your nails through it gently, “oh yeah definitely, your hair always smells and feels amazing.”

He’s glad you’re behind him since he can hide the blush adorning his cheeks. He momentarily gets paranoid that his ears are as bright red as his face but decides that if you ask, he can blame the panic attack. He wants to stay awake, though – you hadn’t had the chance to tell him of your internship and since you hadn’t had much time to talk through the week, he wasn’t sure how you were even doing these days. He’s about to ask about yours when a yawn rips through him, his eyes droopy and heavy. The last thing he feels is you placing a gentle kiss to his head again and his final coherent thought is that he wouldn’t mind if you continued to do so.

You know Shinsou’s fast asleep by now, his breathing even and deep. He’s even snoring a little bit and you giggle. You try to reach for your phone on your nightstand but he’s got you caged in. His grip on your arm is tight, and as you try to move away, he pouts and grips it harder. You snort at him and decide to spoil him a bit longer as you lie back down, squeezing him close to you.

You’d probably never be able to take the pain from him, to ease him and convince him that he’ll make it just fine – he’s a year behind and even with all his training, he’s painfully reminded of that at every corner. You know it’s not the right encouragement so you don’t say it out loud but sometimes you feel like you’re the one stumbling behind him. His dreams shine so brightly and his resolve is admirable. Besides being best friends, you’ve also become good training partners – since your quirks aren’t physical, you both need to really hone your martial arts and it’s been deliberating to have a partner who knows how to make your strength – and weaknesses – clear as you train.

You crane your neck, trying to get a look at his face. His facial features are soft, relaxed and the only movement is when his breath comes in and out. His bags seem almost non-existent here in the dark but you know they’re there, hanging under his eyes like weights. His mouth is slightly ajar and you’re guessing there’s most likely a drool trail on the underside of him and down on your pillow. You let your hand drag his hair back from his cheek, feeling the soft skin there and you can’t help yourself as your fingers continue to his nose, tracing it all the way down the slope. You��re seconds away from touching his lips too but realize what you’re doing as you retract your hand. Your hand rests back on his shoulder and you can’t help but notice how his upper arms have gotten bigger – at least since you last took a look at them. You can’t help but think about how far he’s come and how far you know he’s going to go. Pride swells in you as you start playing with his hair again as a way to distract yourself from the fact that you’re so close.

It's been a few hours of you contemplating him and how you could support him better when you feel his grip on you loosen – you take your chance and crawl out from behind him. As you see the clock on your phone, you’re reminded that it’s soon time to go back to your respective rooms and as you look down on him, you can’t help but click your tongue. It’s just not fair! He’s finally asleep and you know that if you wake him now, he’ll sink into his own head more as he returns to his own room and there he’ll be all alone.

You’re contemplating what to do and if there’s a way to avoid this but can’t really come up with an effective strategy except facing it head-on.

So here you sit, outside your door, feeling a bit silly after 10 minutes. It’s five minutes past curfew and you suspect that a teacher will show up any second now, telling you to get back inside your room – where Shinsou is. God, you really hope it’s Aizawa who’s at work tonight – your whole plan relies on that, actually. You’re about to unlock your phone and play some cheap game when you hear Aizawa clear his throat at the end of the hallway, walking up to you.

He says your name in a reprimanding tone and you move to get up, “you should be in your room,” he says and you straighten your back, “hear me out,” you start as you adjust your shirt, “Shinsou’s in there.”

Aizawa’s eyes widen but only for a fracture of a second before he eyes you again, “so?”

“He just finished his internship today and–” you begin and he interrupts you with his arms crossed in front of him, “I know.”

You give him an annoyed glare and realize this might be the first time you’re really giving him an attitude. “–He hasn’t slept – like, at all! He’s been so stressed and strung out and he finally fell asleep a few hours ago!” you’re not sure where your case's going and you curse yourself for not planning your arguments better. Aizawa just looks at you with a raised brow, “so?” he repeats but you have a feeling he’s more interested in the rest of your argument than to actually shut you down, “so what I’m trying to propose is, that you let him sleep there tonight.”

You’ve straightened your back again and with your hands on your hips, keep looking at Aizawa with all the confidence you can muster in hopes it’ll help convince him. He lets a hand run through his stubble as he looks around the hallway, obviously perplexed. Maybe there’s a chance he’ll actually say yes, you think and let yourself relax just a little – but not enough to look like you’re faltering.

“Look, I know about Shinsou’s insomnia, and I’m really glad he’s actually sleeping right now but–“ he sucks in a breath through his teeth and bites his lip for a moment as he contemplates his next words, “–not a word of this, to anyone, understood?” he’s pointing at you with a stern look and you can’t help the big smile that adorns your features, going in for a hug before you think about it, “thank you! I knew you really cared about him, too!” you exclaim before going for the door handle. Aizawa says your name firmly and when you look back at him, he’s wearing the smallest – but also caring – smile before repeating the deal.

“Got it, not a word to anyone.”

You enter your room again and lock the door behind you, letting out a relieved sigh as you realize how fast your heart is beating. You can’t really get your head wrapped around the fact that you actually convinced him to say yes. You walk over to your closet and grab your pajamas.

You’re about to let your pants drop to the floor in the middle of the room before you remember that Shinsou’s there. Technically, he’s asleep and won’t see you or even know you did it but you feel weirdly embarrassed as you make a beeline for your bathroom to change and brush your teeth.

All right, now you just have to… go back and sleep next to Shinsou, in your bed, all through the night – naps weren’t unheard of between you but you’d actually never slept through a whole night together. All right, it couldn’t be much different, right?

The tiredness you felt as you had brushed your teeth has evaded you as soon as you’ve climbed back behind Shinsou. Just as you had resigned to your fate of nervously cuddling him while falling asleep, he turned around in his sleep and wrapped his arms around you while mumbling out your name, his voice hoarse from the crying earlier and so, so sweet. His warmth encapsuling you as you feel his breath fan over your collarbone, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

Yeah, it’s safe to say you did not get proper sleep that night.

“Have you ever kissed someone?” you’re biting your lip as you avoid the confused gaze he sends your way from the other couch in the common area. You’re the only two currently, Jirou leaving mere minutes ago with the instruments you’d been playing with for the past hour. Shinsou with a guitar had steered something in you – listening to him trying to sing along with his newly acquired skill to play Leaving on a Jet plane by John Denver mostly correct had made your heart rate pick up so fast that you were momentarily worried you might have a heart condition. The concentration on his face certainly had to do with the multitasking required by playing and singing at the same time but it only heightened your rather… romantic sentiments towards him and you couldn’t hold back the question that’d been burning at the back of your mind the past week. He massages his hand, most likely aching from the chords he was still learning to get right. “What’s up with you?” he asks back, “there’s been a lot of… inquiries to my romantic endeavors the past few weeks.”

You don’t mean to get distracted by the way his voice sounds hoarser, a lower timbre than you’re used to him using around you – but he just sounds so… good like that that you can’t help the butterflies batting all the way up to your ribcage. You sharply inhale to ground yourself and lift your feet up underneath you on the couch, “guess we’re just at that age?” you try to laugh but you sound so nervous that you have to hold yourself back from biting your own fist in embarrassment from even starting this conversation with him.

If you dared to look up at him at this moment instead of being harsh on yourself, you probably would’ve noticed how intent his gaze currently was … on the window. So you decide to lay your confession first, in hopes that it’ll fish his out of him.

“I’ve never kissed anyone.”

All Shinsou does is nod as he says, “cool to know, cool to know…” tapping a rhythm with his fingers on his thigh and you’re about to yell out because the embarrassment that was the entire situation is almost too much to bear, “I haven’t, either…” the silence stretches for a while as you process the information, “kissed anyone… that is.”

You can’t help but laugh out loud at the fact that he had to confirm that the subject was still on kissing and not moved to something else, like whether or not you’d ever owned any fish. Shinsou’s face lights up and matches the color of Kirishima’s hair and you don’t think you’ve ever seen him look this distressed. Belatedly you realize he might be thinking that you’re laughing at him for never having kissed anyone, so you kill your laughter by coughing into your elbow, “I’m so sorry Shinsou I didn’t mean to…” you try and he laughs awkwardly, almost painfully. “I didn’t laugh about… I mean, I haven’t kissed anyone either, right? So why would I make fun of that!” you try, “what I laughed at was… oh my God, it’s not even funny,” you realize mid-sentence and hide your face in your hands. You groan as you lift your head and gather the courage to look at his face again, “I didn’t laugh about the fact that you haven’t kissed anyone.” You say it so there’s not doubt what you meant and Shinsou, with his raised eyebrows, nods at you and looks at you as if you’re an idiot.

“I forgive you?” he tries, ending it like a question because he’s not sure where you’re going with this exactly. You jump up from the couch like a stiff board and look at him, “want coffee?”

So here you stand, next to each other in the kitchen. You’re waiting for the water to finish boiling, hip to hip. Your coffee cups are ready in front of you, the instant coffee already meticulously put in the cups to each of your likings and it isn’t until he gets the milk from the fridge that you realize you’ve made each other’s coffees. You’re not sure whether or not to comment on this until he puts the milk closest to you, so you can pour it into the cup you’re preparing – which is his.

You’re about to say something when the kettle makes a beep sound, indicating it’s finished. Shinsou grabs it and gently pours the hot water into the cups, stopping where he knows you want him to and for a moment you’re hypnotized by watching him make coffee. It’s almost gentle, the way he circles the kettle to properly blend in the grinded coffee, pouring softly and with attention to it. Your eyes travel to his hands, currently with fresh wounds on his right knuckles from Heroics Class two days ago where he had to fight Kirishima in a ‘rescue the civilians from the villain’ training scenario.

Your hand reaches out before you can think and your fingers gently prod on the wound – you expect a wince or other reaction similar to that but instead it’s dead silent, his grip only tensing around the kettle. You retract your hand and apologize profusely to which he laughs, “they don’t hurt, don’t worry. And I take care to clean them every night,” he adds the last part and you smile at him – as Shinsou was getting used to being in the Hero Department, it’d also meant getting used to more bruises. While first aid was covered during first year of the Hero Department, it wasn’t exactly part of the curriculum for the General Department – at least, not to the same extend. So you’d taken it upon yourself to teach him the robes, puffing out your chest – so excited to finally be able to teach him something. He’d been your favorite (and only, he kept adding) student and even though you already spent all your time together, it felt nice to sometimes have a reason.

You drink your coffee in mostly silence, sitting on each of your phones. He’s scrolling through Hero News and you’re playing one of those stupid puzzle games, stuck on level 342. The atmosphere is calm and the awkwardness from before seems to have dispersed like invisible dust – only visible in the right sunlight or circumstance. You spare him a glance once in a while, smiling to yourself.

Shinsou’s standing in his room, controlling his breathing. It’s Sunday evening and you’re coming back to the dorms in an hour or so. You’d gotten called home Friday, getting permission to leave school grounds due to a family related issue – before you got picked up, you weren’t sure what was going to happen or why you were called home but assured Shinsou you’d be back Sunday. You’d texted him 45 minutes ago that dinner was over soon and you’d text him when you were on the way.

Shinsou hasn’t heard from you all weekend and he’s been nervous about it – the only thing he got was a snap, to keep your streak alive – but most of all he’s worried about you. Kaminari and Sero are sitting on his bed, propped up against each other, “I know that you’re nervous bro, but I promise it’ll be fine!” Sero tries for the nth time though it does nothing to quell Shinsou’s worry. Kaminari makes an agreeable noise as he plays on Sero’s switch – he’s not being a very good friend right now, he knows – but to his defense, Shinsou had been pacing like this since lunch.

Saturday was movie night at the dorm and the movie was some romance movie Shinsou didn’t even know the name of, but he’d sat with eyes wide and mouth hanging open – multiple times did he have to be reminded to close it. He was completely mesmerized by the fact that the plot of the two almost-lovers reminded him awfully much of his relationship with you – and it’d ended happily in the movie. After it was made obvious that he was definitely going through something, Kaminari had teased him and yelled out “how many here thinks Shinsou’s got an honest shot with them?” since you weren’t there anyway – and everyone had agreed that all he had to do was confess. The only people who hadn’t ‘voted’ in that impromptu election was Bakugou, who was busy on his phone and Shinsou tried not to think too hard about that, deciding that he probably wasn’t even listening. Alright, so all he had to do was confess? Shoot his shot?

Easier said than done.

You’d texted that you were on your way back and had to talk with him when you got there. He feels like his heart is beating out of his chest as he shoos his friends out of his room before walking to yours. He figures he might as well wait for you there, right?

When you arrive Shinsou straightens his back and tries to hold back the big smile he’s currently sporting – he’s not interested in scaring you away so he contains himself as best as he can. You’re looking pointedly at the ground and haven’t even spotted him by your door yet so he lightly jogs to meet you halfway.

He says your name in a gentle tone and the shock that’s written on your face surprises him and he raises a brow at you. You hurry to school your expression, trying to remain neutral. “What’s wrong?” he asks and you motion for your room with a sharp inhale and a nervous click of your tongue.

As you enter your room Shinsou closes the door after you and lets you get comfortable on the bed before he joins you. You don’t look all too happy and he’s worried something terrible has happened. He sits down and takes your hand in his, repeating his question, “what’s wrong?”

You start crying as soon as he squeezes your hand, unable to look him in the eye.

“I’m moving to Europe in a few weeks.”

message me here to join the taglist and once again, thank you for reading!

#boku no hero academia #bnha #bnha x reader #shinsou hitoshi x reader #shinsou x reader #shinsou x you #genderneutral reader #disabled reader #multichapter bnha #nohr.writings #inked coffee fanfic #shinsou fluff #mha x reader #shinsou hitoshi fluff #my hero academia x reader #nohr.writing

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jainaproudwhore · 3 years

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It bugs the fuck out of me that gamers, even on this website, are calling this “fake woke” or in fact “too woke” its so genuinely disheartening to see the bad faith arguments coming from people even in my own nearby circles. Ill begin with some concessions, was this entirely necessary? obviously not. Is it welcome? Sure its just a painting! Do i want them to go even further and remove Slutmogs? Hell no but the rest of the dogshit being spewed out on twitter is absolutely insane. “Blizzard is just trying to save face!” They’re being fucking sued... 3 times??? There's no conceivable way, that anyone who plays this game and heard of the lawsuit, would just “forget their wrong doings.” The Warcraft team DOESNT think this, corporate doesn't think this, we don't think this. Its fucking dumb, there is no psyop to try to mind wave melt our memories. This is some shit that's rotted our brains collectively. “think of the incentives!!!” like... Do you think corporate lawyers give a literal fuck, about how much booba is shown in a pixel painting? “What a waste of Resources on something more useful” This is quite honestly baffling to me. The a game that is known for its meticulous world building and asset use, actually spending resources on the very thing that makes wow so unique is somehow.. a waste? what the actual fuck lmao. If this change wasnt put in.. what do you think the artist would be working on hmm? i can tell you, OTHER PROP ART. IF anything this means they can just use this painting in newer content with how updated it looks. Its like people are completely unaware of how their game is made. “theyre trying to censor the female form!” This isnt even REMOTELY true, send me an ask when they remove slutmogs then ill be right there beside you in saying that blizzard shouldnt just outright censor themselves. but this is faaar far far removed from being problematic cencorship. We went from 5 pixel boobie to 10 but with less cleavage... wow we’re all children of jesus now! fuck off! Let me leave off with what I will bet money on, happened at blizzard offices A team of devs was formed then went searching around going back through wow compiling lists of “sensitive” media, from as simple as this painting, references to dicks and balls, outdated jokes, to references to actual abusers ingame. Brought them all for everyone to see and then one prop artist thought, “y’know updating these old paintings would be cool/ look nice” So they went and did it, and it was approved by the team. AND THATS IT. No one barged into the artists desk demanding they halt what they're doing for THIS painting. No lawyers showed up saying “remove this or we’re fucked” no Christian censorship takeover of the company is taking place... holy fuck!

#Theres probably way more bad faith discussions being had that i probably missed.#Rant

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thoughts-on-bangtan · 3 years

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a poem for small things

by Admin 1 & 2

The time has come, the first proper post for this segment we’ve settled on calling a poem for small things, a nod toward BWL and its Korean title. Like we said in our call for submission post, this is supposed to be something like a place full of positivity for vminnies (and perhaps the occasional namjinist) where you (and us) can share whatever we’d like in connection to vmin, both as vmin and as Jimin and Tae the individuals, and have something to raise our mood and also strengthen our vminnie confidence. We’ve gotten several wonderful submissions and quickly realized that for this first post the theme is mostly how I became a vminnie, even if three submissions talk more about vmin moments they enjoy instead.

I think it’s a really interesting theme, especially since everyone’s story is different, and everyone seems to find something else about vmin that captured their attention and hearts so sharing these memories and experiences is a great way to start off this segment. We’ve said it many times before, though I don’t think you can say it enough times, but this bond that Jimin and Tae share is truly special and so one of a kind, it’s wonderful to see how we all relate to and resonate with it in our own way and find something in it that makes us fall in love with their loves, regardless if we see it as platonic or romantic love. Love is love after all. 95z is love.

For the order of these submissions, we’ll simply go in the order in which we’ve received them. Most of them came from anons, which is more than okay. We’ve also opened the possibility of submitting posts for those who would like to submit wordier posts/asks, should we do another edition of this. It all depends on how much you’ll enjoy it and if you’ll come through with more submissions that could be gathered for future posts.

Anyway, enough talking from our side, let’s dive into these submissions below the cut, shall we? Like we said in the original post (and demonstrated in the preview post), we’ll add some of our commentary and observations along the way, too.

From anon: This is going to be long winded story but Vmin is like a Serendipity to me. I've heard of BTS mainly from my hubby when he complains that times sq is packed because of BTS (when they’re in town and doing their rounds of morning shows). I knew they were very popular but it was a great surprise that i discovered them after watching ILand during lockdown. Their songs were great and i started playing their classics like Fire, DNA Fake Love etc. Then they did an appearance in the show...

I love how you heard about BTS because of your husband and Time Square being packed, this is honestly the most original and unique version of how I’ve come across BTS I’ve read over the years. Amazing!

I was drawn to Taehyung's beauty during their appearance in Iland. And my first Vmin ? moment was when Tae commented about being handsome and attractive are 2 things and being attractive weighs more - along those lines... then JM made a comment that its unfair that he's both and Tae was like Im talking about you... I went like ok he thinks JM is attractive- theyre good friends.... then Jimin did the FakeLove choreo and the camera focused on Tae and he had this wide smile...The Iland Tae/Jimin clips made me do a double take but I dismissed it since it was just only a few seconds worth of screen time but still...

I-Land vmin was really something else in both episodes.

Fun fact: I-Land was the first Korean survival show I’ve ever watched, mostly because it had something to do with BH and since it was streamed online with subs in real time. Unfortunately, my faves—Daniel and Taki—didn’t make it into ENHYPEN, though I’m happy that Taki will be in a future Japanese BH group.

But, going back to vmin, that moment with Jimin dancing FAKE LOVE and Tae looking at him with that boxy smile as though Jimin hung the stars in the sky? I melted, even if it was just one of those brief moments, yet still it’s so cute! And it was all over sns being shared by vminnies and non-vminnies alike. What a great time that was.

Then VMAs Dynamite perf happened- both Vmin looking good. I saw a lot of their promos especially the Jimmy Fallon interviews... and I noticed in hindsight how JF was so careful when referring to Jimin ... Since Tae was my first bias, I searched YT for Tae related content eventually saw in my YT feed Vmin moments. Theres a lot of Vmin content in YT or maybe the T*ek*ok ones didnt really register as extraordinary to me. But defo the Vmin moments were extraordinary to me,,,the BV4 sleeping together, kitchen role play & BV3 JM excited to see Tae and them holding hands and then Tae crying and then Tae's busking with Jimin cheering him on were all amazing to see. Up to this day this specific YT vid stood out to me first

I actually went to check what video this is, and also looked at the comments where my favorite was this one: The staff member went straight to Jimin to tell him V was crying. That's all you need to know. They’re not wrong with that one, are they? That is pretty telling. BV3 vmin were a work of wonder, truly. Jimin watching Tae sing that Sam Smith song during the dinner in the sky looking all soft and endlessly fond?

Jimin encouraging Tae to busk and gently petting his hair was just such a pure moment and showed how much Jimin appreciates Tae and the talent he has, how in moments when Tae might brush aside wanting to do something, is a little hesitant and unsure, Jimin will stand up for him and give him strength/encouragement, which reminds me of Tae’s vlive in April 2020 and the fact that Jimin had told him that he wants to be his source of strength. Beautiful. And it shows that it wasn’t just pretty yet empty words, but something he truly meant. They both do.

Then i came across vid trans of Friends & cried first time hearing it especially when it got to the part "One day when the cheer dies down, stay hey.." It felt raw and honest to me. Then there's MOT:E concert and that part in Dynamite where they bumped their heads seemed bizaare to me - i was like were they fighting? because JM looked really fierce(or maybe emotional) then i saw the close up. i couldnt remember the exact moment I became a Vminie but it made quarantine easier...

This, I’ve noticed, seems to be a recurring theme among quarantine ARMY and vminnies, the fact that becoming ARMY and vminnies made it easier, and it fits with what we’ve been saying about BTS for years: they will find you when you’ll need them most. And in these trying and uncertain times, it’s certainly proven true once again.

Thank you of much for your submission and sharing your story with us, and I’m glad they could make quarantine a little easier for you.

From anon: I've been following BTS on and off since BST, but only really consider myself a true fan late 2019. I can't recall having a bias at first, but I was captivated by Jimin's everything when I binge-watched all their content. I must admit, my first OTP is T*e/k*ok, where I fell down the route of considering Jimin 'an interfering 3rd party' in their relationship, and it shamed me. Since then I've been cycling through Jimin ships, namely yo*n/m*n, j*n/m*n, m*ni/m*ni, and I even thought that j*/k*ok was real at some point. Strangely, Vmin never struck me as something extraordinary. I don't want to blame anyone, but Vmin caught my eye after I watched official BTS content without filter (presumed bias/judgement) all in their glory. I realized that while other ships may go up-and-down as in one day there's a frenzy and another day quiet af, Vmin has been and is still going constant. That's what makes me love Vmin, and for the first time in my fandom life, I have no qualms about whether they are real or not. Their bond, whatever it is, is already precious and something to be cherished forever. Thank you for providing us vminies a special corner to speak up about our experience 💜

You’re very welcome! I hope you’ll like how this turned out as well. Thank you for sharing your story with us and personally I find it fascinating how, despite Jimin being the one who captivated you most at first, you still fell into the “he’s an interference for my ship” trap that’s quite popular with that particular ship. I’m glad though that that never ruined your love for Jimin. It’s also really interesting for me how you went through different Jimin ships yet it took you the longest time to notice vmin. I feel like, because vmin and vminnies are more “low key” than the other bigger and louder ships, as well as Tae and Jimin simply being quieter in their interactions (not always but you get the point) as compared to, for example, Jimin’s interactions with Hobi, Jungkook, or even Namjoon, it takes people a while to really notice them.

This is my favorite part of what you wrote, and I think it’s a great way to describe vmin in general and what makes them different from other ships in the grand scheme of things: I realized that while other ships may go up-and-down as in one day there's a frenzy and another day quiet af, Vmin has been and is still going constant.

From vminot7: So i fell into BTS hole after watching blood sweat and tears mv casually on youtube. Jimin immediately stole my attention with his unique voice, graceful moves and handsome features even though i didn’t know their names at that time. I watched more MVs and jimin continued to hold my attention but i was also extremely drawn to taehyung's voice and facial expressions. So i started looking for more content such as RUN BTS and other compilations and realized my love for all 7 of them. I also noticed how jimin always had a soft spot for taehyung and was curious about their dynamics. I started looking at more of vmin content and i was really surprised to see how in the early days they were nowhere near as soft with each other as they are now. I think they have a unique bond and i have never come across anything quite similar. Now vmin are both my biases and my bias wrecker is hoseok.

I admire jimin for being a hardworking, passionate perfectionist but also a caring soul who is always ready to offer love and comfort to people in need. I love taehyung for how he looks at the world in his unique ways and how he has a childlike awe for things and how he is so passionate over the things he loves. The thing i love about vmin together is how they are so different yet work so hard on their relationship when it would be easier to just not try that hard.

Ah, another mention of the queen that is Blood, Sweat and Tears. The MV truly is such a masterpiece so I’m not surprised that it caught your attention, and especially Jimin since he was…something else in that MV, or like Tae said, his eyes were temptation (this boy, I swear). Since you mentioned how in the first years they were nowhere near as soft with each other as they are now, I think watching their dynamic and relationship change and evolve over time showcases the one thing I think a lot of people (as well as movies and TV shows) forget or gloss over, despite it being so incredibly important: in order to make a relationship of any kind work, especially in order for it to grow as deep and strong as the one between all members and especially vmin, you need to put in the emotional work to make that happen. You have to make an effort, have to learn to understand the other person and teach them to understand you as well, learn to appreciate and love their little quirks and how to accept others. And it’s so clear that that’s what vmin did, continue to do, and it more than paid off in the long run. I’m glad you highlighted that in general but also as something you love about them.

While the overall bond between the members is a class of its own, I think especially what vmin have achieved is a whole masterclass in relationships and fostering strong ones, in and of itself. There is a lot I think we can learn from them and I’m so happy that people recognize how special they are.

Thank you so much for your submission!

From anon: There’s this small moments in Dear Class of 2020 that i just adore! I’ve watched it at least 20 times this past month

It starts with “Spring Day”- tae and jimin laugh and look at each other and it’s just so sweet!

Also, maybe it’s my delusional mind but after tae’s and jin’s small and adorable moment- it seemed that jimin did the same with junkook right after maybe out of i duuno if jealousy but like “pay attention to me too” kinda way- dont know really and maybe it’s me being extra🤷🏻‍♀️

I agree partially, in that Jimin watched Tae’s and Seokjin’s adorable moment, obviously must’ve thought of it as cute just like we did, and thought he could do the same with JK. I don’t think it had anything to do with jealousy, especially if we work off of the idea that vmin are a thing, but also because it’s a performance and these things primarily serve the purpose of being cute and entertaining use, in other words, it’s fanservice (which isn’t the evil word some portray it as). Also, within that same performance, Tae and Jimin actually sang some of the lyrics toward each other, therefore they, too, had a cute moment they shared with big smiles and everything, just like you mentioned.

But we’ve gotten to see much more of Tae’s friendship with Seokjin in 2020, and especially the second half, so it was really sweet to see them interact during that song. Their friendship and dynamic is really a beautiful one, just like JKs bond with Seokjin, which I feel we’ve also gotten to see more of in recent months. Part of me (and that part can very well be wrong) feels that perhaps once the members caught on to Seokjin feeling the way he said he did/does, they decided to give him an extra dose of love and affection, off camera but also on where we can see it. That isn’t to say that they didn’t show him any of that before, but maybe they increased the intensity a little, a reminder that Seokjin truly is loved, that he deserves all of this, that it’s just his imposter syndrome (or at least what sounds like it) lying to him.

I’m still so touched and moved by the fact that he trusted us enough to share his feelings with us, to gift us Abyss and how it came to be, and that Bang PD was on his side and coaxed him into pouring his feelings into music, even if it would be “bad”, that the fear of it potentially being “bad” shouldn’t hold him back (and Namjoon helping in even if just a tiny bit with the lyrics). It was one of those times where I feel like we were all reminded that regardless of our opinions of BH and their doings, the members are surrounded by kind people who have their best interest in mind. After all what’s good for Bangtan is also good for the company, a win-win for everyone.

…wow, okay, I kind of went off on a tangent, I’m sorry…

Either way , then we have “Mikrokosmos” where we have a sweet moment at their part and towards the end where they switch mic and hear each other

I love this performance overall and especially “spring day”- jin’s and j-hope’s lovely voices and of course tae’s!! This song fits them so well and all the members of course

Well this is my rent , i love your blog and always wait for another post! Also i love the new idea and look forward to it!

Thank you so much for your submission and for bringing up their Dear Class 2020 performance. It was a truly magical one, and after reading this the first time, I did go and watch it again. To this day I’d still very much like to know how and when and why the mic switch between vmin happened, and I kind of hope that we might get a Bangtan B*mb or EPISODE about this eventually and it might shine some light on that question. Overall it was one of my favorite performances on 2020.

From Sky: While I enjoy cute, physical moments with VMIN, I really do value how emotionally attached they are to each other. For example (I don’t know if it fits as vmin moment but), I love how Jimin asked V to take the Promise cover photo, and how he ended up putting V’s name for credits on the cover. (Special Thanks to V, Best Photographer) This really shows a lot. Coz he can easily choose any Bighit photographer to take it. He could have chosen JK because we know how he takes good pics and vids too (and also apparently alot of people say that vmin had a falling out and that Jimin and JK were much more closer, lol). Or he could’ve asked Suga too bec he’s into cameras too. But he didn’t. He chose V, and chose to shout it out to the world how thankful he is for V’s help. RM co-wrote Promise, and maybe had offered more help in this project, but he didn’t put it in the cover. I’m not saying Jimin is ungrateful for not crediting RM in the cover. The difference is that he and RM had a vlive regarding the making of this song, a lot of people already know RM’s participation, he was officially credited as co-writer and Jimin really showed how thankful he is to RM. But no one knows of V’s participation (except for a snippet in that Run ep), so Jimin felt the need to tell it to everyone. I’m sure it’s not only the photos, I think he wanted to acknowledge how V helped him through the process, whether directly or indirectly. Also, remember this is Jimin’s first non-album solo single. By putting V’s name in it, he is sharing this very special song with his soulmate. How endearing it is! V also included Jimin in his first full English song. He used the two bears given by Jimin as Winter Bear’s cover photo and he included the photo Jimin took (sleeping V in the plane) in the MV. Like, seriously, they are trying to consciously imprint each other in their life’s milestones, openly or subtly. I’m crying. 😭

This was lovely, and yes, Jimin could’ve asked whoever to take those pictures, could’ve chosen any other ones, and yet he wanted Tae to be the one to take them, wanted those specific ones as covers. It’s very sweet and creates this subtle connection between Jimin, the song, and Tae. Sure, it isn’t the first time a picture Tae took is the cover for a SoundCloud song (the picture of JK on the 2U cover was also taken by Tae if I remember correctly), but it’s the fact that Promise is Jimin’s first non-BTS song, his first solo release, that makes it that much more special. Even more so when you think about how meaningful that song is to Jimin, and by having Tae as cover picture photographer, he’s in a way forever attached memory wise to that song as well, right?

The same also goes with Winter Bear and the two ceramic bears. Remember how excited Tae looked when I kinda spoiled that gift being a thing happening in an upcoming RUN episode during Jimin’s vlive during the summer 2019? Adorable. It’s also curious how though the title is singular—winter bear not winter bears—there’s two ceramic bears. One for Tae, one for Jimin? Maybe, or maybe I’m reading too much into it. Either way, it’s really cute, and it was a very thoughtful gift, even more when we think about just how much Jimin loves that song.

From anon: Love this idea it's super cute!! 1st thing that came to my mind is a rather simple moment, jimin bopping taehyung's nose and making a lil game out of it

Taehyung asking for more and that dazed smile 🥺 he had the same expression in that concert when jimin placed his face just above him, tae's smile afterward... it was so pure u could almost read "love" in his eyes lol

What a lovely note to end this post at, thank you for that. I don’t know what got into them during that photoshoot for Season’s Greetings 2020 but this was so disarmingly adorable. I remember when that moment appeared all over every sns and everyone just melted, myself included. Their smiles, the cute clothes, Tae’s head on Jimin’s chest, the softness and innocence of it, just all of it. It truly was so pure and like this sweet visualization of ‘love’.

And with that, we’ve reached the end. Did you like this? I had a great time reading your submissions and adding my little comments to them. If you’d like for us to continue this, same rules as last time, send in a submission marked with “VMC” and once we’ll have enough of them gathered, we’ll do this again, if you’re interested in more, that is. Send in whatever positive vmin you have, a thought, a moment, a memory, whatever you’d like.

Thank you once again to everyone who participated! :)

#vmin #jimin #taehyung #a poem for small things post series #bts #bangtan sonyeondan #so many sweet vmin things #you really came through with the cute submissions #dear class of 2020 #bts seasons greetings #BTS bon voyage 3

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