#drunk & disabled

[the-forest-library]

“You should be at the club.” No, I should be at the seaside for my health.

#leave me be #I need rest #not a night out too late with loud and drunk people #you should be at the club #disabilities #disability #spoonie #mental health

[st-hedge]

I said a while ago that for totk’s one anniversary I would write a weird little review of the game in which I throw roses at it while simultaneously slandering it. So I made an attempt which is very abbreviated

Disclaimer: I’m not telling u how u should feel about totk or what’s the right way to feel about it, I’m just trying to make sense of why the game frustrates me and putting it into words. It’s completely fine if u disagree with me, I’m not pitching an argument but just putting words on paper

Totk is one of the best games I’ve ever had the opportunity to play. The mechanics, the music, the designs, the revised world of hyrule, makes me want to curl up on the floor and cry. It is stunning and done with so much love. Where botw had lacked, totk has improved and gone above and beyond. It had frustrated me that botw only allowed us to explore the ground surface, but botw was an exploration into open world games which allowed for totk to happen. The caves, the boats, the islands, and the depths add so much to already such a vast world. I only wish there was also diving but beggars can’t be choosers beh

Although it still doesn’t make too much sense to me why all weapons are suddenly corrupted, I do love the new weapons system. I love how it gives more variety to explore. Materials which previously sat unused in the inventory are now key and nothing feels like a waste to collect. Even rupees have found another use. I’m not the biggest fan of the zonai devices but the addition feels like a love letter to the creativity of the fan base and it feels at place. They help to traverse an otherwise huge and intimidating world. But at times I feel like they give too much leverage and break down too many boundaries and leave little to solve and explore. What im basically saying is fuck the rockets.

I feel that totk doesn’t have enough progress boundaries that make u pause and explore what u have at hand. I found myself just pushing and pushing, forgetting and leaving behind areas I barely touched. It felt too easy getting into the sky and returning to the islands and they lost some of their mystery to me. I think this would have been a great opportunity to reintroduce the loftwings from skyward sword. I’ve talked before about how much this would make sense for totk. The loftwings could be a means to cross boundaries and explore new territories, but it takes time to catch and tame one as a companion. But like horses they should have their limits, presenting new boundaries u need to overcome again

Where the totk’s hyrule begins to confuse and disappoint me goes hand in hand with my main issue (confusion?) with the game. Although botw felt incomplete (the world was a little sparse and one dimensional), the story was comprehensive and clear. Meanwhile, totk has a complete and lively world but it doesn’t have a story to carry

Totk’s story doesn’t have an identity I can grasp and understand. It’s like it doesn’t know what it wants to tell the player, what story it wants to direct them to. On one hand, it seems to want us to know about the origins of hyrule and the mysterious landmarks and characters that are permanent fixtures in this world (castle, ruins, dragons) but at the same time it suddenly wants to do a retelling of OoT and about the sages and these secret stones. But the game never completes any of these stories. Maybe it wants to tell us these stories through the environment, but there is just not enough embedded into the world to grasp and tie together into a narrative. Which is ironic considering how big the world is

We begin to be told the story of the dragons, we suddenly understand how they came to be (the secret stones). But we are never told about the events of their creation (an act of desperation, like Zelda’s) and we are never close to understanding them. Then we are told about the sages, but meeting them tells us nothing new. No new cutscenes, no new items or lore directly related to them. The new sages are found, but didn’t we just discover the divine beasts with them? Suddenly another layer of importance is added to them which makes the ties between legacy and the current sages muddier. I wish there had been focus on them creating their own legacy instead

I think totk could’ve had a very interesting story to tell if it chose what it wants to focus on. Maybe the secret stones were introduced just as a way for Zelda to become a dragon? I dunno

There are so many new places that feel like fantastic opportunities for moments of pause and to uncover lore, unearth memories. But instead they’re brisk puzzles or empty sites. Like the graveyard underneath the desert, the forge islands, the factories, and the fucking poe statues. Tell me as much as u want that I can’t read environmental story telling, but I’ll just keep saying there’s nothing to read into cuz the game doesn’t know what it wants to say. There’s no thread to follow in the way there was with, for example, the graveyard at the spirit temple in OoT. We could’ve been just left with a strange well and a graveyard and told to figure it out, but a thread is laid down that these are the skeletons in the royal family’s closet.

Totk does have amazing moments, like Zelda meeting her ancestors and giving up her identity to become a living legend to revive the master sword, the discovery of the ancient temples, the story of the zonai and their origins. But these are just pieces with many loose ends around them that go nowhere. Even Ganon is left as a loose end where there was so much opportunity to say something worth saying. He seems comically evil with bogstandard bah I want to rule the world lines. If u want to make a case for evil for the sake of evil, u can at least show me a character repeatedly making horrible choices which lead them to the current predicament. Just like totk’s hyrule, he is lovingly designed but he tells absolutely no story

If the reason behind the lack of story is that the devs/writers wanted us to make our own story out of this, then I think this is a case where it was a poor choice. The fans can make theories, hcs, pick up pieces and make AUs, but we also love the stories told by the games and it’s what inspires us to uncover more stories (hey wanna talk about tp and why we hear Malon’s song at night, or what’s up with the empty desert)

I’d love to see totk from the perspective of someone who had never played or known botw. Did it really help to remove any traces of sheikah tech besides the labs and the guardian limbs in the towers. Although the zonai devices and the sheikah tech are from different time periods, totk was a perfect opportunity to marry the two elements together. The shrines and the divine beasts could’ve collapsed into the depths, but instead they have just vanished like erased history

Totk’s story doesn’t have an identity in the same way botw’s does. Even though botw’s hyrule was much smaller and emptier, we found stories there cuz we knew what that game was trying to tell us. If totk is about making sacrifices, then this message feels obsolete by the end. U should make sacrifices, but u will only be happy again if it all goes back to exactly how it was before

As happy and sweet the ending is, it made all the worry and sadness I felt seem pointless cuz of course everything would reset back to the norm cuz how else would this game have a happy ending. What was there to worry about. Yeah so what that Zelda became a dragon losing herself, she was just asleep the entire time and effortlessly she becomes her normal self. So what that link lost his sword arm, of course he would miraculously get it back even though it took him 100 years to recover from a mortal wound. No trace of the things they withstood and lost, no mark, nothing.

I loved the final battle and spectacle of the dragons struggling against each other in the sky. The battle went from the deepest depths to the highest reaches of the sky and I thought it was perfect. But once again how the story concluded and the logic behind it me made me feel like I was chewing on sand and the idyllic ending just made me look about in confusion

TLDR; totk is an amazing game with a stunning world that lacks a comprehensive story to tell

I hoped that I would get a better understanding why I’m so frustrated by totk, but instead I just feel even more confused by it and I think that’s just how I’ll have to leave it

#I disabled rebolgs so this doesn’t leave the target audience #I became progressively drunk as I wrote this

[uwingdispatch]

Wayward Evenings

Notes: Ezra Bridger/Reader, established relationship, gender neutral reader, post-rebellion/post-war, hurt/comfort, chronically ill/disabled reader

CW: alcohol consumption, the aftermath of alcohol consumption, implied sexual intimacy

Ao3 Link

★★★★★★★★

You hadn’t expected to spend your evening holding your husband’s hair back in the refresher. In fact, you’d had other plans. But when Hondo was in town…you’d learned to expect this kind of thing. Perhaps it was your mistake to try and do tonight any other way, but you’re still annoyed that Ezra is just so…Ezra when it comes to the former pirate. 

“You’re lucky you’re pretty,” you tell him. Ezra is leaning against a cabinet on the floor doing his best to stay upright. Despite your irritation, you’re right there with him, smoothing his sweat-slicked hair away from his face. “Every time,” you say. “It’s like you’re incapable of making good decisions around that man.”

“I think you’re onto something there, sunshine,” he says. “But can we talk about it tomorrow? I feel like I’m going to die right now.”

You let out a deep sigh. “Sure,” you say. “If you promise to never drink pirate moonshine again.”

“It was made on Batuu, so technically it’s moons-shine.”

“You know what? I’m just going to leave.”  You have no intention of leaving.

“I’ll never touch that shit again,” he says. “For you, of course.” And then wretches again. 

An hour ago someone at the cantina had called you to come get your idiot husband. They normally would have called Sabine—she was more physically capable of dragging Ezra out of a bar and throwing him into a speeder—but she’s been off planet for the past few weeks and that left you and your droid to come coax Ezra out of the building and get him home. 

“I know you had plans,” he says. “I’m so sorry,”

“Too drunk to stand up,” you say, “before the sun’s even fully set!”

“I guess I was just feeling ambitious.”

“When they called me to come get you they were worried you were going to try and fight a Dowutin. Over an insult to Hondo’s ‘honor.’”

“I would never actually—” 

“If you weren’t who you are you might have gotten arrested.”

“I know.” 

“Ezra, I love you, but I really don’t love this.” 

Even still, you’re rubbing his back, holding him steady. There are people you meet at a certain age and somehow, whenever they’re around, you become that age again. You understand this. It just doesn’t make your current predicament any less frustrating..

C2-B35 rolls in grumbling and hands you fresh towels, which you pass off to Ezra, who seems to be regaining his balance as he stands, the nausea abating.

“I think the worst is over, Cee,” Ezra says.

Ceetoo, being a therapy droid ultimately concerned with your wellbeing, chirps and whirrs—a curse-ridden message for Ezra that you don’t bother acknowledging. Because despite her vitriol, the little astromech has been monitoring his vitals since the two of you picked him up earlier. 

“Get cleaned up,” you say. “Is there anything you need?”

“You’re too good to me,” he says. “But all I need is you.”

In the kitchen, inhaling a bowl of leftover pasta, you remind yourself that this is not a regular occurrence. You hear the shower running and feel a bit of relief knowing you’ve moved on to the part of the evening where Ezra can take care of himself. Which means the vomiting is over. And given how much of that had gone on earlier, you’re pretty sure he meant it when he said he’d swear off Hondo’s moonshine.

When he emerges he’s wearing just a pair of gray lounge pants and a soft red robe—yours—left open. 

Ceetoo is nearby watering her plants and in a series of beeps and whistles she asks if she needs to still be monitoring Ezra. 

“I’m good, Cee,” he says. “I just need to rest. And make up for…all of this.”

He slips his arms around your waist and nuzzles your neck before pressing a soft kiss to your temple. 

“Feeling better?” you ask.

“Eh…mostly.”

“Still a little drunk?”

“A little.”

You take his face in your hand, brushing your thumb over his cheek before tucking a few wayward curls, still wet from the shower, behind his ear. He leans in as if to kiss you and you stop him. “Not before you drink that water,” you say, pointing to a large glass on the kitchen counter. “All of it.”

“And then?”

You shrug.

“You know I’d do anything for you, sunshine,” he says, his voice low, his lips almost touching your ear.

You reply: “I know.”  

***

You’d been dating Ezra for six months when you first met Hondo. Ezra had described the old Weequay as “kind of like an uncle, but not the kind of uncle you call in an emergency…unless it’s like a real emergency, he’ll show up for that.”

And after a night out with Ezra’s “uncle” you wondered if you really knew who you were dating. It wasn’t that the liquor had changed his personality, or even that Hondo had. You just hadn’t seen this side of him before.

“I think I overdid it,” he said.

“You did.”

“I should have warned you.”

“Ezra,” you said. “I don’t know if there’s any way to warn someone that one of your dearest friends is the kind of person who thinks axe-throwing while drunk is a good idea.” 

You were walking a rather tipsy Ezra home after what you had thought would be a casual dinner with a quirky family friend. But that was not how time with Hondo would ever go. You’d threatened to leave over the whole axe-throwing throwing thing, but stayed a while when Ezra reluctantly backed down from the challenge.

“I forget that Ezra Bridger cannot hold his liquor,” Hondo had said. “I would do anything for this boy, but he would have made a terrible pirate.” 

Ezra looped his arm around your waist and sighed. “With Hondo,” Ezra said, “sometimes it feels like I can go back in time. Like…”

“Like all the time you lost while you were away didn’t happen?”

“You get it,” he said. “Of course you get it.”

“I don’t know if I get it, but I think I know what you’re saying.”

Ezra never got to go through a wild phase—not the way most people did as young adults. Hondo, however, seemed to make space for the chaotic teenager in anyone. Which maybe under other circumstances might have been fine, but Ezra’s limit was usually a pint or two of ale. Tonight there had been Correllian wine. And then shots of something that smelled like explosives.

Just outside of his house now, Ezra mumbled, “I would have been a great pirate.” 

You swiped his key card to open the front door and, as soon as he could get to it, he flopped into his bed. 

You sighed, watching Ezra struggle to take off his socks. “I’m sure you would have been legendary.”

“Legendary!” he repeated.

You got ready for bed, using the items of yours that had started to collect in the refresher. Some you’d left at Ezra’s place over the last few months. Others Ezra had bought for you, wanting you to feel welcome and at home with him. He called your name, and you went to the kitchen to get him a glass of water, knowing he’d be feeling this in the morning if he didn’t at least try to hydrate.

“Come here,” he said. “Let me hold you.”

When you joined him in bed, he pulled you toward him, undressed now, his skin warm against yours. “I don’t usually drink like this,” he said.

“Yeah, I don’t think I’ve seen you this intoxicated before.”

“That’s on purpose,” he said. “I can’t believe I let myself…you know what? It doesn’t matter. It’s fine. I’m fine.”

“Drink the water,” you told him.

“I will,” he said. “Hey. Hey…can you look at me?”

You tuck his hair behind his ear, let your fingers trail down his neck and along his jawline. “I’ve been looking at you this whole time.”

“I’m just so glad you came out with me tonight. I know Hondo is a lot, but he’s family.”

“He’s probably not too fond of me.”

“Are you kidding? He loved you.”

“Really?”

“How could he not, sunshine?” he said. And after a pause, “Do you know how important you are to me? How much I love you?”

It was the first time either of you had said these words to the other. And you hadn’t expected to hear them as a drunken confession. “Ezra, I—”

“You don’t have to say anything.”

“It’s okay. Just…tell me again when you’re sober.”

“I will.”

He pulled you close and you rested your head on his chest, breathing deeply. He smelled of sweat and alcohol, of course. But also of him. Of a man you’d very much fallen in love with. Sometimes you thought you’d fallen in love with him the day you’d met. But you’d held those words back, wondering sometimes whether Ezra Bridger was the type to settle down. 

But now, there was something about the way he stroked your hair as he started to doze off. And when he said “I’ll tell you I love you every day for as long as you’ll have me,” tipsy or not, you believed him.

***

You’re in the kitchen brewing a fresh pot of caf when you hear Ezra stumbling down the hallway, followed by the loth-cats that had been sleeping at his feet.

“You’re never up this early,” he says.

His hair is wild, and he’s wearing a robe—his this time—and not much else. You don’t need to tell him he’s a mess. He knows. And he knows how he got here.

“There’s no Jedi trick for hangovers,” you say. “Or at least that’s what you’ve lead me to believe.”

You put a plate of eggs and two headache tablets on the table and he sits, a look of defeat in his big blue eyes.

“I’d been hoping to make you breakfast today,” he says. “I really kriffed things up last night.”

Ceetoo comes in the front door carrying a shopping bag, looks straight at Ezra and starts grumbling in binary.  

“I know,” he says. “I’m profoundly aware of this. Can you please lower your volume?”

You bring two cups of caf to the table and sit beside Ezra. A man who’s stayed up with you through countless nights when your chronic pain was at its worst. Who makes a point of bringing you your favorite tea anytime you have a particularly bad migraine. A man who, when you’d first met, lived on the opposite side of town—but when he found out how difficult your anxiety could get, he started making that long drive to you any time you were struggling and he thought he could help.

He did kriff up last night. But you can’t find it in yourself to hold it against him. “It was a rough night,” you say. “But it’s behind us.” 

Sipping his caf he says, “Thank you, love.” 

“You would do the same for me.”

“I don’t mean the breakfast. I mean, I do. But you deserve better than a grown man who can’t get his shit together for one night so you can go out with your friends.”

There’s something sheepish about him as he takes your hand, and you see the “boy” Hondo always refers to when he talks about Ezra, despite his being in his forties. 

“You have your shit remarkably together ninety-nine percent of the time, Ezra,” you say. “I can make new plans. And you were sick enough yesterday that I think that might be punishment enough.”

Ceetoo grumbles as she brings you a plate of sliced fruit. She’d happily gone to the store for you but had been less than enthusiastic about it when you told her the fruit was for Ezra—she could hold a grudge as well as any organic. But you reminded her of how many times he’d been there for the two of you, and that if you could forgive him for one ruined night, she could, too. 

As she’s leaving the kitchen she beeps and whistles: try not to barf.

Ezra laughs. “I’m so glad she doesn’t actually hate me,” he says. “Though sometimes I wonder.”

You sit in silence for a while, listening to the wind blowing a tree branch into the window outside, the birds singing in the garden. And you remember planting that garden with Ezra when you first moved into this house, how you reminded him again that you probably wouldn’t be able to help much with maintaining the garden because of your chronic pain. And he’d taken your hands and told you that he didn’t expect anything of you other than that you being in his life. That just you being here, making a home together—that was enough. He’d wiped the tears from your cheeks when you began to cry, your heart so full it was spilling over.

“How are you feeling?” you ask.

“Better now that I’ve eaten, actually.”  

He gives your hand a squeeze before you get up to feed the two tooka cats who have gathered under the table, nipping at your feet. One you’d had when you met Ezra—the other was a three-legged stray Ezra had found living in an alley behind his work, far too friendly to be a street cat. You nearly trip over the little guy as you turn to put the kibble away, only to be steadied by Ezra—you hadn’t even realized he’d gotten up from the table.

“Hey,” he says. “I’ve got you.”

“I was fine,” you insist.

He smiles. “Sure.”

His grin is infectious, and soon you have your arms around his neck, unable to stifle the smile on your own face. He ghosts his fingers along your cheek, his thumb swiping over your bottom lip for a moment before leaning in to kiss you, slow and lingering.

“You can make me dinner tonight,” you tell him. 

“And in the meantime?”

You can’t imagine he’s recovered that quickly. But Ezra is always full of surprises. So when he leads you back to the bedroom you follow. He discards your clothing in the hall, piece by piece as you stumble over each other, a feeling of lightness filling you as he kisses your forehead, your nose, your neck before you tumble into bed. And when you find yourself beneath the sheets with Ezra, you’re thinking about how seamlessly he fit into your life, from the very beginning. And now, how perfectly your bodies fit together, his deft hands finding exactly where and how you love to be touched. 

He whispers in your ear: “Let me make this up to you.”  

And you melt into him, your fingers lacing into his hair as he kisses you deeper, a spark of electricity running through you as if it were the first time he’d ever kissed you. 

“You still owe me dinner,” you tell him.

“I’ll give you anything,” he says, pressing a kiss to your clavicle. “Anything you want,” he says, “it’s yours.”

And, if only because he’d never once given you a reason not to, you believe him. 

★★★★★★★★

Thank you so much for reading! Once again I am here to be a gremlin about Ezra Bridger somehow growing up to be Blorbo. I hope this fic made you feel seen and loved.

I have a taglist now! Sign up here if you want to be tagged in future fics. (And choose if you only want to be tagged for certain characters.) In the meantime, I’m tagging my taglist as well as some folks who have been reblogging my fics. Love y’all!

@writingbylee @waterpancakeao3 @princessxkenobi @zinzinina @aerynwrites @belfry-bat @phoenixhalliwell @r1-sw-lover @laserbrains @darthanakn @lovedbyth3sun @usernamesarebitches @maul-ologue @operation-spot @writeforfandoms @akgracemk @littlemousedroid @strwrs @saveatruckrideoptimusprime @galaxtic-writings @mintpurplemnm @againstacecilia @elasticreality@zombiedixon89 @forresway @sith-as-heck @alistocats @favficss @themandadolorian @ginger-swag-rapunzel @iamsuchanasshat @vvpoisonous @saradika @islandfrogeery @boba-brasso-bee @groguspawbeans @fluffyprettykitty @mischiefqueer @wretchedmo @wyn-n-tonic @dystopicjumpsuit @1vlouds @lucypaulette @x-0ophelia0-x @densenubi @dolphincommander @glass-soup @cosmictearsfall

#middle-aged ezra bridger #ezra bridger #ezra bridger x reader #ezra bridger x gn reader #ezrabridger x gn!reader #adult ezra bridger #ahsoka series #ahsoka series fanfiction #star wars fanfiction #star wars rebels #and a loth-cat because I can #disabled reader #chronic illness #hurt/comfort #just a little domestic fluff #and a first meeting #comfort reads #the fluffiest fluff #tw: alcohol #drunk!ezra #soft!ezra #uwingwriting

[voidscreamns]

./

#i dont think i’ve talked my nonverbal!Diluc hc on here yet #but i keep seeing posts abt disability/chronjcally ill/neurodivergent hcs for genshin characters so here’s one from me #idk i feel like after That Night™️ and being on the run from the Fatui/working with a secret organization #diluc not just learns the ‘value’ of keeping secrets and staying quiet but also internalizes his guilt and trauma of saying smth that could #hurt people #it started with him telling Kaeya that he’s not a Ragnvindr anymore and then is exacerbated by his 3-4 Year Fatui Murder Rampage thru Teyvat #and with all ghat trauma and self-deprecation and paranoia he just. stops talking. #he picks up sign language in Fontaine and still writes but at some point he just stops talking and never speaks again #when he comes back to Mondstadt it was hard to adjust to for both him and the people around him #Kaeya initially assumes that Diluc just refuses to talk to him until he later hears gossip abt how no one has ever heard him speak since he #came back. he goes to Adelinde and/or Elzer abt it and they tell him that they neve even hear Diluc so much as hum or grunt #afterwards everyone changes up real fast— Kaeya and Venti drinking at the bar and seemingly just talking at Diluc but they’re always #observing his reactions and body language even when they’re drunk #Jean tries her best to be patient but she has a hard time reading him bc he’s changed so much in the time he’s been gone #Adelinde & Elzer and the winery staff are the most communicative he’s with— Diluc is far more likely to write with them to communicate #at some point Diluc has a business meeting with some rich dude from Fontaine or smth #Kaeya walks in bc he has an actual important mission thinf to discuss and he sees Diluc and this Fontaine dude and the dude’s wife #moving their hands so fast and with all kinds of gestured and stuff #and it’s the first time Kaeya sees Diluc look so EXPRESSIVE— he’s frowning and raising his eyebrows and mouthing words and all this #and Kaeya just goes ‘what’ #turns out the Fontainian dude is deaf and both him and his hearing wife know sign; she helps interpret this to kaeya for the dude and Diluc #and Kaeya is like ‘oh okay’ and goes to the kitchen like ‘i’ll just wait here till yall are finished’ #and he sees Adelinde and Elzer there with stoic faces and they just. stand there in quiet for so long. #Kaeya finally says ‘…..so. sign language huh’ and Adelinde and Elzer have the most pained looks on their faces #later that week Diluc finds like everyone around suddenly doing basic signs with him #he later learns that the winery has ordered a shitton of signing books from Fontaine and are trying to learn #+ Kaeya and Jean too with help from Lisa bc like dont you know learning several languages is a requirement for graduation from the Akademiya #soon the use of sign starts spreading in Mondstadt— there might be some small communities where they have their own native sign but it’s not #as standardized nor widely known as it is in Fontaine #this is getting really long so I’ll stop here but yeah. nonverbal Diluc who signs fjskdjs

[neuroticboyfriend]

Does your activism and positivity include drunk drivers?

this is probably a hate anon but im going to dignify it with a response anyway. because yes, it does.

disclaimer: i am not saying drunk drivers bare no responsibility for their actions. they do, as we all do. part of why we (all people) are responsible for our actions is bc we have awareness of them. we can make choices. and when our capacity for choice and awareness is diminished (i.e, when we are mentally disabled), our responsibility is too. note that i say diminished, not gone. that's important.

anyway. i know people with DUIs and they have grown into much safer, happier people. people can change, and addicts (disabled people) need support to make that change. disability (human) rights cannot depend on someone's morality. they wouldn't be rights otherwise. they'd be privileges... and we all know turning rights into privileges leads to oppressions.

#asks #anon #greybox #graybox #driving under the influence #drunk driving #alcohol tw #DUI #alcoholism #alcoholic #disability rights #human rights #morality #addiction recovery #addiction #anti ableism #ableism #sanism

[bewitched-bullet]

In an AU where John was never injured and was actively working out, for sure!

And since my fan asked for it, ye shall receive!!

But for realz, y’all. To carry a 6ft+ tall man WITH a recent shoulder injury when you’re only 5’7”……this is what it would look like before getting dropped on your sorry butt lolololol (speaking from experience 😅)

And if anyone is interested, you can read my Ao3 fic: To Pull on the Spider’s Silk!

#autistic artist #artists on tumblr #creative writing #art #writeblr #artwork #writing #writers on tumblr #bbc sherlock #disabled #disabled community #doddles #drunk doodles #john watson #sherlock holmes #autistic #romance favorable aroace #johnlock #sherlock au #sherlock fanart #sherlock comic #sherlock fanfic #sherlock x john #sherlockbbc #i crack myself up #ao3 community #ao3 fanfic #To Pull on the Spider’s Silk #gay #gay romance

[flashbackonyourbehalf]

IM LOSING THE LAST FEW YEARS OF MY TWENTIES TO BEING IN SO MUCH PAIN THAT IT TAKES ME A FULL FIVE MINUTES TO PUT ON MY PLATFORM GOTH BOOTS

POINT ME IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION AND I WILL FIGHT WHICHEVER GODS HAVE CURSED ME WITH THIS

Physically I cannot stand but mentally I WILL STORM THE GATES OF HEAVEN AND HELL TO EXACT MY VENGEANCE

I DO NOT DESERVE THIS

I AM IN SO MUCH PAIN

#I’m also drunk #it helps #pain flare #chronic pain #no more chronic pain #chronically ill #owwww #physically disabled #physical disability

[sp0o0kylights]

Zero idea if this has been done before but while trying to teach myself to draw simple demodogs, I got the idea for Service Dog Dart for Steve.

Like a Dart that ended up having to live with Steve because Dustin couldn’t hide it, (though Steve makes him come by and walk Dart at dusk) and Steve started training Dart as a joke to do some cute tricks. 

After Starcourt though, Steve and Robin (who is practically living at Steve’s, figure out Dart has somehow hiveminded itself to THEM, and is now doing it’s “tricks” to try and provide help, and they’re able to quickly direct Dart to start acting as a service animal. 

This poses some issues for Steve, primarily he can’t exactly USE Dart as a service animal in like, public, but as someone who is disabled (I almost wrote technically disabled there, that’s how deep THAT goes) and who was super athletic (still am but like it be different now) it takes TIME to adjust to the fact that something isn’t going to go away. That you are going to have to live with and manage shit for the rest of your life, and the knowledge that it might get WORSE is a weird nose hanging about your neck and it’s a whole thing, so I can see Steve not being ready to be out with a service animal just yet, insisting Dart needs more training (it does, it keeps eating squirrels at inopportune times and in one very bad incident, Erica’s friends hamster) and that he’s “not that bad.” 

Dart can help a lot at home though, and eventually even in battle. 

#stranger things #steve harrington #dart #disabled steve harrington #service animal dart #service animal #stranger things four #0o0 ideas #Eddie starts off terrified when Dart sniffs him out of the boathouse in the beginning but very quickly ends up adoring Dart #and gives him a love for beer #Steve is constantly yelling at him about not getting his dog drunk #Darts never acted drunk but like #they dont know #Robin mentions horses can drink beer its even healthy for them #Steve declares shes turned traitor #its a whole mess #Eddie makes the service animal best #and adds patches #and pins

[soldier-poet-king]

My father, talking abt how one of his co-workers is maybe autistic. My brother, immediately, well as long as he's high functioning. My dumb ass trying to explain why the term high functioning can be harmful and while a lot of professionals still use it, autism self advocates are trying to push away from it. Deliberately trying to explain this without using any sort of "fancy" terminology or strange concepte. My aunt, disdainfully, ugh all this terminology it's changing everyday I can't keep up.

Being assertive and Present is going. So well.

#franposting #why do i fuckin bother #trying to be like. a person. and a good person. its not going well #this is why i shut up and dont say anything #unless im drunk or extremely mad #i will simply. stay out of the way and pretend i dont exist #its easier #and im tired of being disappointed even in my quote unquote more resonable family members (ie. my aunt) #how at the end of all things is my mother the most resonable open minded person #not to b like terrible hallmark movies and primetime tv shows have changed her #but like. even the bullshit tokenism on tv. helps sometimes? my mother is like. oh i saw a gay/trans/disabled/etc person in this shoe #show* and suddenly shes like. even the slightest bit more accepting or able to see them as human beings #its so fuckin stupid. and conflicting #and i still hate her so much of the time. she caused so much of my trauma #god i need to get out of here but god everything is so expensive and im a coward #and im afraid i dont know how to be a person on my own anymore. if i ever really did

[leonardo-dabepis]

weakest greytide vs strongest secco

#space station 14 #space station 13 #my art #fanart #I missed all of my disabler shots yesterday while attempting to arrest the same person three different times #then I had a mental breakdown and spent the rest of the shift getting high and drunk and threatening to shoot journalists

[oatbugs]

. anyway after writing the tags 4 this post i told my research partner i will no longer follow his dreams lmao. still helping w it but i need to engage in research that i find satisfying

#i think ive been waiting for something for a while and i will spend the next year waiting for it too #i thought i felt panic but i have decided to read it as anticipation. the thrill of rejection or of moving forward or the latter as #a result of the former. i left you with your backpack unattended in the cafe because on fridays i am done #putting my life on hold for another whim-without-a-warning #this cross country service is delayed by 26 minutes so i will grab a bucket and start shovelling the water away from the tracks #everyone is moving on in some different way and im sorry if you think im mean for telling you getting so drunk will disable you from #recording your brainwaves effectively but it seems like you think i owe you an awful lot. one year ago in four days my friend got me hegel's #science of logic for my birthday and i thanked him for proving to me the existence of things this is what i do he said #and then he will spend the rest of his life breathing philosophy and i dont want to spend the rest of my life #breathing someone elses dreams i wait for the moment of realisation. this is now a 30 minute delay. i was supposed to worship beautiful #things and that is what i will do. i think i have a best friend and i know i have a lover and i know to #restrict my love the way you have. im sorry. i hope you understand when i tell you. i am now sitting on the floor in the luggage section of #this incredibly busy train and i saw a photo of her with her boyfriend and her hair in braids smiling like a fool this is the #except a week ago you told me you almost took too much this time to live. you are a beautiful girl with a beautiful soul and you know you #have already changed the world and it somehow was not enough. now you are smiling without any makeup on next to him #and yesterday you cried in an airport in the states when you were too full of love. this is the most extraordinary human being i have met. #tomorrow he heads off to princeton while his best friend heads to harvard. he goes there to make the world a better place. he is the most #extraordinary person i have ever met. the issue with human beings is that we are incredibly good at almost dying and keeping going. #you try to kill yourself and publish a paper and give a talk. you negotiate the seperation between your own parents and submit another #phd application. i am surrounded by extraordinary people with extraordinary minds and incredibly broken happy hearts. #i only see you smile when you talk about robotics. i still dont know how manifolds work and i love the concept anyway. i dont know. #i do know that i refuse to live unsatisfied. #you can keep drinking. im going to drink this reality up #i think i was a horrible person and i refuse to engage with that mentality again no matter what it takes.

[flutt3rb4tz]

bwaah i had fun drawing this one im ngl. i love drawing men(?) in dresses and also fit men i love it its sooo fun. and shines.. heheh shiny

anyway character is named valentine (he/any)

#💗 the cgs #mspaint #ms paint #trans artist #disabled artist #oc art #the suspicious red liquid is supposed to be wine #hence “wine drunk”

[storeboughtbrand]

Trinket! Tiny music box, (I don't recognise the melody it's familiar, it has been years since I've seen the music box last)

(Here's a shell for size)

CONGRATULATIONS YOU’VE JUST UNLOCKED: MUSICAL SCENARIO - playing simulation now……

*The Flyboys minus Mav and Goose are at the O Club and have maybe had toooo much to drink 🫠*

Ice: He’s just not getting it, Sli. I’ve tried everything - showed concern for his safety, displayed aerial prowess on par with his, and presented my physical fitness- all characteristics of a great-no-amazing husband! What am I doing wrong?!

Slider: *real tired of his pilot’s bullshit but also determined to be the best wingman* I don’t know what to tell ya, Tom. Maybe you just have to let him g - wait, did you say husband?

Ice: Yes.

Slider: …..you meant boyfriend, right?

Ice: We’re not teenagers, Ron. Boyfriends is such a jovial term. We’d be husbands…*small gasp* - no, we’d be wingmen.

Slider: *turns to look at the other flyboys for help but they’re all munching on popcorn, watching the shit show unfold. Turns back, takes a deep breath, and whispers - I better be your best man at your fucking wedding* Well at this rate, you’re gonna be calling each other nothing *ice glares at him* so we’re gonna need a change in strategy. This is Maverick we’re talking about after all.

Ice: *turns to look at the peanut gallery* Any suggestions because you lot are not allowed to freeload when there’s a mission to complete.

Slider: *mutters* a dumb fucking mission. *then pauses and his eyes widen* oh my god that’s it.

Everyone: What’s it?

Slider: You’re trying to woo, Mav……so maybe it’s time to stop thinking like a Kazansky and start thinking like a Mitchell.

Ice: ….you can’t be serious.

Slider: *shrugs* I mean what do you have to lose…other than Mav’s sweet ass. *walks over to Ice and grabs hold of Ice’s shoulders so he can look him in the eyes* Come on Ice - Don’t think, Just do.

Ice: ……………….

#Ice thought like Mav and disabled all of his neurons #Absolutely brain dead and ready to smash #Don’t let the Flyboys get drunk without adult supervision #Man’s took the Charlie serenade approach and that move was not very effective #Mav thinking Ice is trying to sabotage with lack of sleep #Guess who got her iPad #it’s over for you bitches #pete maverick mitchell #tom iceman kazansky #icemav #storeboughtheadcanons #top gun maverick #top gun #top gun shitpost #ron slider kerner #Class of 86 ensemble #asks from the clearance section #once again another useless contribution to the fandom

[callixton]

ohhh i’ve been home for like three hours and already i am on edge. i feel like i can’t cough now bc my mom hears and it’s distressing her over the overall state of my health so much that she came into my room with tears in her eyes. like i know it comes from a place of love but holy shit i cannot take this all summer.

#and i really do miss her and am glad to be home #but she’s apparently had a bad run lately when it comes to drinking and i am freaked out #it’s also that it comes from a place of her feeling like she’s failed as a mother and like shit just happens! you can’t do anything to help #- me no matter how much we both wish you could do this is just hurting us. #i hate being touched when she’s drunk too it just makes me feel wrong and scared and i feel bad bc she’s just trying to tell me how much she #- cares but also wtf am i supposed to do. i’m disabled and it sucks but you telling me how sorry you are just makes me feel like i need to #- protect your feelings #and then she ruins any chance i have at resting bc i am so fucking on edge and i hate it i can’t do this #it’s gonna be fine. i just need her to stop drinking right fucking now and that’s not gonna happen #ted talks

[tittyinfinity]

my best friend and I, ages 28 and 33, tried to stay up until midnight (when I got paid) so we could both drink after a long, rough week, but we both ended up falling asleep while sitting up. which I think says something about our age compared to how we were a decade ago

#we were so excited we were like omg we both get paid at midnight and this week has sucked let's get drunk #*immediately passes out* #and it happens almost every time with our disabled asses #.bdo

[agayconcept]

.

#oh for fucks sake #if i have to listen to my shithead of a mother bitch and whine and moan about me being disabled one more fuckinG time i s2g #she's been going on for 20 mins abt how annoying it is that i had to go lie down for a bit bc i had a migraine and a pain flare up #which meant i guess that she didnt get to make dinner when she wanted to (i told her she could just eat w/o me like who cares) #so now she's on a rampage abt how inconvenient it is to her and how i ruin her schedule and her life all the time etc etc #and when i responded calmly w 'well what would u like me to do- snap my fingers and not be disabled anymore? u TOLD me to go lie down.' #she exploded and is like 'oh noOoo ofc not nothing is ever ur fault u just accidentally do these things' #bitch WHAT THINGS ????? #exist as disabled ??? be in so much pain i spend most of my life these days in bed ??? be unable to function to ur standards ???? #do u Hear urself ?? #now she's sitting on the couch pouting and fuming like a toddler bc i was in bed for 2 hours instead of 30 mins (bc too much pain to get up) #and throwing a tantrum like that is in any way normal or acceptable behaviour #'u always do this! but nooo u can do w/e u want cant u ?? u dont have to consider others!!' #ma'am... #a) no i dont have to consider others when it comes to taking care of myself and my debilitating illnesses. that's an insane thing to suggest #b) nobody told u u could not do w/e the fuck u wanted while i was out of commission. u just did this to have more to complain abt #c) ah yes bc i 'want' to be bedbound in excruciating pain. that was a choice i made. for funsies. for the bit. #whaT ????? #god someone save me im gonna lose my mind w this shit #not to mention she's also belligerently drunk so like. there's that also. cant have any proper convo bc of it (not that i wanna talk to her) #jesus fUcking chrisT #i gotta get out of here #this woman is so immensely hateful #ya sorry i ruined ur life by being born this way and now ur stuck 'putting up' w me and 'my shit' (<- actual things she has said many times) #fuuuuuck me. #anyway. #negative #ableism #verbal abuse #ask to tag