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scuttling · 3 years

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Head Over Feet - Chapter 4

Fandom: Criminal Minds Pairings: Aaron Hotchner/Female Reader Spencer Reid/Female Reader (Unrequited) Word Count: 5,180 Chapters: 4/4 Complete Tags: 18+, NSFW, Unrequited love, Protected sex, Oral sex, Vaginal fingering, Rough sex, Friends with benefits, Praise kink, Daddy kink, TW Fire, TW Burns Summary: Falling in love with one of your two closest friends was never something you planned; it only makes sense that falling in love with the other would also come as a complete surprise. *Inspired by/in collaboration with @ssamorganhotchner. Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Link to AO3 or read chapter 4 below! You pat Spencer on the back, rub your hand soothingly over his shoulders. He’s not crying, but he’s clinging to you like a child, and your heart aches for him a little.

“I’m sorry, Spence. I know it’s hard when you care about someone and things don’t work out, especially because of what we do. It’s complicated; sometimes people just don’t understand.”

He shifts out of your embrace, stands up, runs a hand over his face.

“I’ve spent most of my life not being understood. I thought maybe I found someone who finally got me.”

You get him, you muse; you’ve always been the one to translate his info dumps into useful commentary, to sense when he’s overwhelmed, anxious, to pull him back before his emotions get the better of him. You may only be his friend, but dismissing that fact hurts more than it should.

You sigh, step into the kitchen, fill your electric kettle with water and turn it on, pull a box of chamomile tea out of the cupboard.

“I’ll be right back. Watch the kettle,” you say, patting his arm, and you head for the bedroom.

Aaron has his undershirt on, and he sits on the edge of the bed staring at the tv—he’s not so much watching it as just looking at it, and when he catches sight of you in the doorway, he turns it off.

“What’s going on?”

“Chelsea broke up with him,” you explain, wrapping your robe tighter around your body. “He missed a function because of work, and she wasn’t able to see past that. It’s been a point of contention.” You know it’s a bit of a sore subject, even after all this time, because of his divorce; you try to tread lightly.

“I should go,” he says, standing, and instantly your heartbeat races. You step toward him, put your hands on his arms.

“No, don’t go. Aaron,” you say when he pulls back, looking around the room as if forgetting that all of the rest of his clothes are piled by your front door. “Please, I don’t want you to go.”

“He needs you.” His voice doesn’t sound particularly kind or unkind, just flat, and you sigh, reach up and take his face in your hands.

“Hey. I’m making him a cup of tea—to go.” He wets his lips, and you pull him down for a slow, soft kiss, drag it out, breathe against his mouth. “Please stay with me.”

“You want me to stay, and you want him to go,” he murmurs, clarifying, and you nod, kiss him again.

“Yes. Give me ten minutes?” He agrees, and you turn to head back to the kitchen, but he stops you, pulls you close for a kiss so full of hunger it makes your head spin. You wouldn’t have thought you’d have another round in you after all that, but it may not be completely out of the question.

Back in the kitchen, Spencer leans against the counter, waiting for the water to boil. His eyes roam over you, and then the mess on the floor—clothes, shoes… condom wrapper.

“I didn’t realize he was here,” he rasps. “I’m sorry; I shouldn’t have come.”

“It’s alright. I understand.” You walk around him, pull a travel mug down from the cupboard, an unspoken sign that a warmer welcome is not being extended tonight. “You’ll go home and get some sleep. In the morning, call her and apologize for the things you said. The situation may not be as hopeless in the light of day.”

“It feels pretty hopeless,” he counters, and you stand next to him, look up at him.

“There have been times I’ve felt pretty hopeless. You’ll get through it, with or without her.” He rests his elbows on the counter, his head in his hands, frowns exaggeratedly.

“I wouldn’t blame her if she doesn’t take me back. I was a jerk.”

“Love makes us brave and dumb; it’s an unfortunate combination—and you, Doctor, are not used to feeling dumb.” You tap him lightly on the arm, smile softly. “If she gets you as well as you think, she just might understand your reasons for saying what you said.”

“How did you get through it? When we… When I…” He trails off, but you don’t need him to finish; you both know what he means to say. “Because it feels like my heart is literally breaking, even though I know that’s biologically impossible.”

“It wasn’t without effort, or… help.” You think of Aaron in your bedroom, who has been nothing but patient and kind and caring, who has been there through sleepless nights and self-doubt and you being, honestly, a little insufferable; the thought makes you smile. You loop an arm around his, lean against his shoulder. “Or the knowledge that what is meant to be will be. I was meant to love you, Spencer Reid—but only like this: friends, partners, bad movie buddies.”

“I like this,” he agrees, and you stand close until the kettle beeps. You prepare his tea, snap the lid on the cup, hand it over, and he leans down to press a kiss to your cheek. “Okay, I’m taking your advice. Wish me luck?”

“All the luck,” you say with a smile, and then you see him out, close and lock the door behind him. You make a second cup of tea—in an FBI mug, this time—and head back to your bedroom, press the cup into Aaron’s hand where he sits propped up against the pillows.

“Is everything alright?” he asks as you climb onto the bed, curl up against his side.

“I think so; I gave him some advice, he left in better spirits. Whether or not they can work it out is another story. He can take it from here, though.” Aaron takes a sip of tea, hands you the mug, and you take a sip and then set it on your bedside table. “I’m glad you didn’t leave,” you say softly when you turn back to him; you just look up at him for a moment, then wrap your fingers in his t-shirt, pull him close for a slow kiss. “I don’t ever want you to leave, you know?” You brush your nose along his, and he brings a hand to your cheek, kisses you back—it starts as something tender, but becomes steamier as it goes on, until you’re panting, breathless against each other’s lips.

“I don’t want to leave you,” he whispers, and you kiss again, a bit rougher, more desperate, pull his shirt over his head. You sweep your hands over his shoulders, his arms, brush one through his hair.

“Good. Don’t leave me.” You rise to your knees, untie your robe, and he gets his hands inside it, runs them over your body, pushes the robe off and onto the bed. He presses up to pull his boxers off, and you swing a leg over his, straddle his thighs, curl in to kiss him deeply, wet and messy. “Don’t leave me, Aaron,” you breathe, beg against his lips, and you lean forward to slip him inside.

You grip his shoulders, moan as you sink down, and work your hips, pressing kisses to his face and hair. His hands caress you, running up your back, gripping your hair where it falls over the back of your neck. “Oh, baby. Fuck,” he groans as you move up and down, and the hand on your back slides down to press against your ass, to encourage your quick, eager movements. “You’re so good; you feel so good. I’m here, I won’t leave you.”

“Hmm. And I’m yours, right daddy?” You look up at him, chest heaving, grip his hair at the back of his head, and he nods, moves his other hand to your ass as well and squeezes hard; you whimper, tip your head back, slam down roughly.

“You’re mine, kitten, all mine; you belong to daddy.”

“Oh, fuck yes. Yes.” You moan, lean back in his lap, press your hands against his legs, and ride him hard; nothing has ever sounded better than his groans, looked better than his face while you fuck like you haven’t already gotten off twice by his perfect body tonight.

You let your hair fall back, bring a hand up to rest on his flexing stomach, and he surprises you by running his hands over your thighs, then your legs, pushing you up so you have to plant your feet against the bed. He wraps his big hands around your hips, takes control and moves your body up and down on his cock, your ass meeting his thighs with each of his thrusts. The new position means you’re leaned back further than before, and that he can see everything—your blissed out face, bouncing breasts, your pussy as it hugs him, enveloping him in tight, wet heat.

“Daddy’s good girl, fucking so pretty,” he grinds out, and you just hold onto his legs, moan while he works to bring you both off. “Come on my cock, baby, all over it. Give it to me.”

“Oh, god. Yes, daddy. I will, I will.” Your head drops back, exposing your throat, and you swallow hard, whine your impatience. You want to please him and find release, and it’s frustrating but so fucking sexy, the position he’s put you in. “Harder, please, please.”

“Harder? Are you sure you can take it?” He slams you down roughly, thrusts up faster, and you tremble both with effort and pleasure, press your nails against his thighs.

“I can take it, I can take you. Feels so good.” You’re breaking a sweat, can feel it prickling at the nape of your neck, behind your knees, and you bounce in his hands, clamp tight, nearly sigh in relief when your orgasm is just out of reach. “I’m gonna come, daddy, gonna come on your cock—oh, fuck. Fuck.”

“Yes, baby, just like that.”

Your climax is powerful, lengthy, and Aaron is loving it if the tightened grip on your hips, the low groans of pleasure are any indication. You don’t have it in you to help anymore, too worn out, but he continues to move your body until he comes, and you stare down at him, satisfied and out of breath and ridiculously—surprisingly—in love.

Oh, fuck. Three weeks go by, and you don’t talk about it—with anyone. It eats at you, and you simultaneously want to scream it from the rooftops and hide it in the dark and hope that the feelings pass.

You love Aaron. You’re in love with Aaron. Your best friend, friend with benefits, the man you suddenly on a whim decided to call daddy because you just can’t get enough of him: of his strong hands, soft hair, lips and voice and just… everything.

You’re not sure when exactly your feelings for Spencer went away, but it’s like they drifted off silently into the night, only to be gradually replaced by sharing big breakfasts and a hot coffee on your desk and wearing his flannel pajama pants just because they’re comfy and lazy morning sex on the weekends—

—are you dating Aaron? Because friends with benefits doesn’t feel like coming home to just the right person at the end of the day, like you missed him even though you work together. It doesn’t feel like desperation, like a need to know you belong in his arms, like a confirmation that he’s here because he wants to be, not just because you asked him to be.

Things haven’t really changed since that night—you still go to one of your apartments after work, have dinner, have sex some evenings or just relax others, sleep together every night—but you’re so nervous you’re going to slip up and say or do something to clue him in that you’re almost always on edge now. He notices, because he notices things, and because he notices you.

“What’s got you acting so odd lately?” he asks softly in your ear while you cuddle on the couch, reading, your back against his arm, legs stretched out in front of you. You’d like to crawl into his lap, wrap his arms around you, breathe against his neck, but you settle for this because it’s a little more manageable.

“Odd? Me?” He curls his arm around your chest, rests a hand gently on your throat. There’s no pressure, it’s just a soft claim, but it makes your heart beat fast.

“Yes, baby. You’ve been quiet. You haven’t flipped a page in a while. Is something on your mind?”

“Not really,” you murmur, and he taps a few fingers against the side of your neck.

“You wouldn’t lie to me, would you?” It’s soft, not a line your daddy expects parroted back to him, but a question Aaron feels the need to ask. You bring a hand up to rest on his arm, something of a hug.

“I’m just thinking. Enjoying sitting here with you.” You tip your head back to look at him, and he leans down to kiss your mouth, slowly, deeply, squeezing your throat just a little. It makes you feel warm and fuzzy, cared for, and a little turned on. “Are you enjoying me?”

“I always enjoy you,” he says quietly, brings his other hand to your cheek to cradle your face. “Just making sure you’re okay.”

“I’m okay,” you whisper, looking up at him, into his deep, curious eyes—he seems to know there’s something more, but he also seems to know now’s not the time. “Do you want to go to bed?”

He nods, and you both get up, tidy up the living room, turn off the lights. When you climb into bed, you just kiss, for what feels like hours, curled up around him, skin on skin. Your next case takes you to Portland, where you are tasked with building a profile for a serial arsonist. It’s not going well.

“We’ve been over this,” Derek says, running a hand over his head. “The motives for arson are simple: vandalism, crime concealment, political statement, profit, and revenge.” You stand in front of a whiteboard with your arms crossed; the words he just said are already scrawled across it in your handwriting, in green dry erase marker.

“Well we’re missing something, so let’s go over it again. There have been no signatures, no hits on social media, nothing sent to the news outlets, so we’re not thinking ‘political statement.’” You draw a line through the words.

“No connection between the buildings, so we’ve all but removed ‘revenge’ from the list,” Emily adds, and you draw a line through that one too.

“Second building had no insurance, was taken over by the city—no one profited from that,” Penelope adds from the speakerphone. You strike it out, sigh.

“That leaves vandalism and crime concealment.”

“Nothing was found at any of the scenes to indicate crime concealment, but it is possible,” Derek reminds you; that one stays on the board. Emily taps her pen against her notepad, looks up at you with a cocked brow and points to the board.

“We’re forgetting one. Hero syndrome: when a firefighter or other first responder sets the fires with the intent of returning to help put them out.” You quickly scribble it on the board.

“So we know that in most instances, those who engage in acts of arson due to hero syndrome have had some type of failed attempt at heroism in the past, be it a botched detective exam, dishonorable military discharge…”

“What about someone who failed out of the arson investigator program?” Penelope asks, keys clacking in the background. “I have an Alexander Carter who works for the Portland Fire Department who has failed out of the program—wow, a whopping six times.”

“Could be he’s trying to prove what an asset he’d be,” Emily proposes, and you turn to jot it down, then freeze.

“Did you say Carter? Alex Carter,” you repeat, and she hums.

“Yes, Alexander Carter, age 30, 5’11”, 200 lbs, brown hair, brown eyes.” You cross the room in a hurry, search your jacket pockets for your cell phone, and Derek stands almost immediately.

“What is it?” he asks, and Emily and Penelope echo his question.

“Hotch and Spencer are with Alex Carter right now. They’re checking out the last scene, the one where the fire went out on its own and didn’t spread. The one that failed.” You look up at him, hold your phone up to your ear, dialing Aaron. It rings and then goes to voicemail three times before going straight to voicemail the fourth. Derek tries Spencer, but his goes to voicemail right away. “We have to go there. Fuck. Garcia, what’s the address again?”

The three of you rush out of the conference room, passing JJ, who gets a brief rundown from Emily and offers to stay back to keep an ear out in case they call. You, Emily, and Derek strap on your vests, and Derek drives—Speed Racer may be useful right now, but your hands are trembling. You sit on them so no one sees.

The building is up in flames when you arrive, and there are firefighters on scene as well as police, EMS… and the coroner.

“Where are they?” you all but scream at the detective. He stands, hands on his hips, shakes his head, and your throat goes dry. “God damn it. Say something. Where are our men?”

“Where do you think they are?” He gestures to the smoldering storefront, and you take a calm, measured breath and step away from him; nothing you say will do you any good, only serve to get you in trouble, and it’s not his fault anyway, not really. You try the fire chief, hope you don’t sound like you’re pleading when you ask him for news.

“My people are working hard to put the fire out; we don’t know the extent of it. We can’t say for sure,” he says, and it’s kind, but firm. Not a guarantee. Derek finds you, puts a hand on your arm, and you look up at him like he’s going to have the answers to this. Someone has to, right?

“We just have to wait,” he says, soothing, and even though you know he’s just trying to help, you could punch him in the face; it’s an unfamiliar feeling, not something you’ve ever felt when faced with Derek Morgan. You shake your head.

“Wait? Wait for what, for—for them to be pulled out in body bags? I can’t wait, I won’t wait. I’ve waited long enough as it is,” you mutter under your breath, turning away. You stare at the flaming storefront, trying to formulate a plan that doesn’t end with Derek tackling you before you can get close enough to call for them, but you can’t come up with anything, and it’s not necessary anyway: less than ninety seconds later, Aaron and Spencer come around from the back of the building, looking a little worse for wear, but not as bad as Alex Carter, who is badly burned on the left side of his face.

You are so relieved you could pass out, and it’s an honest to goodness miracle that you don’t. They get Carter to the ambulance, where the EMTs begin to treat him, and then they walk toward you.

You can’t help it, your feet move without you, bridging the distance, and you crash into Aaron, nearly knocking him over; you cling to his shirt and inhale the scent of smoke and cologne, listen to his heartbeat, think the words you’ve been so afraid to say out loud.

He holds you tightly, one hand on the back of your neck, murmurs words in your ear that you can’t make out; when Derek and Emily come over, you snap out of it, grab Spencer by the shoulder and pull him in too, and the five of you form a group hug and you are not the only one to cry.

You go back to the hotel so everyone can shower, wash away the soot; you would have preferred being able to shower with Aaron, to move your hands over his body and see for yourself that he is unharmed, to wash the stale scent of smoke from his hair, but that’s just not possible. You settle for a text that tells you he’s okay, he’s just tired and ready to go home with you—home, which is apparently wherever you are, whichever apartment you are making noise in, taking up space in, wherever you are leaving half empty cups of tea.

You’ve never wanted to kiss him so badly in your life, but the flight from Portland to Virginia is five hours long and almost torture. He sits next to you on the plane, which doesn’t usually happen, and he does paperwork, brushes his free hand against yours occasionally. You drift in and out of consciousness, so tired from the emotions of the day, and before you know it Aaron is smoothing his hand over your head to wake you up.

He drives you to his apartment, stopping only to pick up takeout from your favorite Indian place—the bags are abandoned on the kitchen counter, though, because the moment you are behind closed doors, everything changes.

You kiss him like it will be the last time—and maybe it will be, considering what you plan to say—your hands in his hair, breath on his lips, the taste of him on your tongue. This could be like Spencer all over again; you hadn’t realized then just how not on the same page the two of you had been, not even on the same chapter, maybe in a whole different book, so what makes this any different? What you have come to realize is love could just be comfortable, guaranteed sex to Aaron, and if he turns you down too, you’ll probably give up on all of it.

You move to the bedroom with the practiced motions of a couple who has walked this walk many times before, but this time it feels different. It feels like matching energies, like emotions that have been tamped down and are now allowed to be fully expressed, fully exposed.

Aaron gets you out of your clothes first, with sure, gentle hands, and then you strip him slowly, look him over the way you wish you could have earlier. You touch his arms, his chest, his stomach, then bend to run your hands over his legs, his feet.

“You’re whole. You’re here,” you murmur when you stand, and he takes your face in his hands, presses his lips to yours again and again.

“I told you I wouldn’t leave you; I meant it.” You wet your lips, look up at him, exhale softly. After a sentence like that, what the hell are you waiting for?

“I love you.” His eyes search your face, and you release one soft sob before he pushes you back onto the bed, covers you with his body, kisses you deeply, wet and passionate.

“I love you—fuck, I love you,” he breathes, his hands in your hair, on your face, and then he reaches down to grab your wrists and hold them above your head. You gasp, shudder, spread your legs for him, and he weaves a hand between your bodies, roughly rubs your clit. “Going to fuck you so good. So good.”

He stares down at you, wrists clasped in one hand, the other working to bring you close, or off, you’re not sure; you ache to touch him, but since you can’t you just breathe a little harder, hitch your knees up higher, give yourself to him.

“Please, daddy,” you sigh, and he knows what you want, guides his cock inside you and then slams it all the way in, so deep that you’re overcome by the feeling of fullness and your eyes water. It’s not pain, or even really pleasure, though it does feel good, but more like… completeness. Like you were made for each other in all the ways that count.

He thrusts into you hard, his knees digging into the bed, and you take kisses when he offers them, moan when he doesn’t, struggle against his grip on your wrists just to feel him tighten it. He pounds his hips roughly against you, uses his free hand to squeeze your ass, then your breast, and then finally, eventually, your throat.

He hovers over you, panting, staring down like he’s viewing a masterpiece and not looking at your sweaty, overheated face. “Can I have you? All of you?” He glides the hand from your throat down to your chest, rests it just over your heart, and you nod, surge up to meet him for a kiss.

“All of me—all of me.” He releases your arms, plants his hands against the bed and fucks you hard, and you slide your hands up his back, pull him down so he’s fully on top of you, heavy and solid and strong. “Take me, Aaron, I’m yours. Take me.” You lift your legs, knees almost up to his armpits, and he holds your hips, kisses you deeply, messy, pumps inside and then comes murmuring your name into your hair. You clutch him, buck desperately against him, mouth at his shoulder, and he shushes you softly, brushes his palm over your hot cheek.

“I’ve got you, baby,” he says with a kiss, and then he slides an arm around your lower back, tilts your hips up, grinds inside until you come digging your fingertips into his sides.

He rests your body against the bed, drapes himself over you, moves his mouth slowly up and down the side of your throat; you wrap your arms around his shoulders, and he presses a hand to the back of your neck, holds you close to him. After a few minutes, he speaks, low, into your ear.

“So this is why you’ve been so…”

“Odd?” you say with a smile, and he tilts his head so he can see you, smiles too, kisses you on the lips.

“Yes. Odd. Because you love me?” You shift slightly, pull back so you can see him better, card your fingers through his hair.

“Not because I love you, because I was afraid to tell you I love you.” He makes a face like that’s the most ridiculous thing he’s ever heard, and you brush your thumb over the ridge of his ear. “I’m not sure if you remember this,” you begin, softly sarcastic, “but I recently told Spencer that I loved him, and it didn’t go over very well. I was scared that could happen with you, too. It was easier to just enjoy what we had.”

He looks over your features, sighs lightly.

“Do you remember the night you stayed late at the office to help me with the records retention? We ordered pizza and you raided Rossi’s office for liquor.”

“Yes, and it was very expensive Scotch and it went very well with my veggie pizza. You smiled more that night than I’d ever seen,” you say, almost dreamily; you’re such a goner for him, now—it’s like letting yourself tell him was the last straw, and now the floodgates are open and your affection pours out of you, thick and sweet and sappy. You press a palm to his cheek, and he covers it with his hand.

“That was the night I realized I was in love with you.” You look up, think back, try to place that night on the calendar.

“That was six months ago. Right?” He nods, slow and steady.

“Yes, six months ago. Two months after that, I… miscalculated. I got it in my head that you and Reid were in a relationship. I tried to pull back, give you space, but you never seemed to want that, so I selfishly continued to spend time with you.” You curl around him, press close for several soft, slow kisses, lightly tug at his hair.

“Well, that explains why you were so confused when I told you what happened with Spencer. Why you thought you couldn’t talk to me. Silly.”

“I just wanted to do the right thing. You were happy, and I thought it was because of him.” That makes you frown, and you think of what happened that night after Spencer’s, how you came here, broken down about being rejected by another man, and Aaron, who was in love with you, was so kind and gracious and sweet, put your pieces back together. You don’t deserve him, or any of it.

“I was happy. I’m happier now,” you whisper, because any louder and you wouldn’t be able to get the words out over the lump in your throat. “And I am so in love with you.”

“I’m happier now, too,” he says, hovering over your lips, “and so in love with you.” Saturday morning is for sleeping in as long as your bodies will allow—that only ends up being 8:30, but it still feels indulgent—and puttering around Aaron’s apartment, stealing kisses because you can’t so much as brush past him without his arms winding around your waist, without wanting to push your hands up the back of his shirt and hug him.

You both get a text at noon, from Penelope, stating under no uncertain terms that the team will be meeting at a bar you frequent, at 9 PM, and that everyone is expected to attend—significant others are not only welcomed, but encouraged.

“So. If you’re alright with it,” Aaron says when he’s driving to your place—he’s dressed and ready, looks handsome in a navy shirt with his sleeves rolled up, top button undone, but you didn’t have anything appropriate to wear, so you’re heading home to change your clothes. “This could be an easy way to tell the team we’re in a relationship.”

You don’t think it will be particularly easy, especially not for you, because you’ll be hounded for information all night, but the timing is convenient, and you just love to hear him say that you’re in a relationship, so you agree. You change, head to the bar, and when you meet up, Penelope and Emily are already there.

“Hey, guys,” you say as you hug Emily, and then Penelope. “Just the two of you so far?”

“Just us single ladies,” Emily says with a sip of her drink. “You didn’t bring the boyfriend? I thought we were finally going to meet the man who’s been putting a smile on your face,” she says with a grin of her own, and you shrug your shoulders, wrap your arm around Aaron’s.

“Actually, I did.” They both look at you, at Aaron, between you, then at each other, and then they aww in unison. You turn to him, smile, and he offers to go for drinks, excuses himself with a soft look and a brush of his hand.

“Holy shit,” Penelope says, and you can’t help the smile that takes over your face.

“Yeah, I know.” Well, that was a wild ride! Thanks again @ssamorganhotchner for the prompt—I know I changed a lot of it, omitted some things, but this is what happened when my fingers hit the keys! 🤣 Taglist 🤍: @thaddeusly @arsonhotchner @mrsh0tchner @ssahotchie @sleepyreaderreads @mintphoenix @meghannnnnn @disgruntledchowchow @azenpal @g-l-pierce @my-rosegold-soul @ssamorganhotchner @heliotropehotch @angelhotchner @qtip-blog @gspenc @wishuhadstayed @averyhotchner @hotforhotchner11 @itsmytimetoodream @unicornprancing @uchihasteph @mugi-chwan95 @madamsnape921

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner fanfic #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfic #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner x female reader #hotch x female reader #hotch x reader

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wickednerdery · 3 years

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Title: Save a Mobius, Ride a Loki: Mort 2 Author: @wickednerdery Fandom: Loki, Rick & Morty Pairing/character: Loki & Mobius, Rick & Morty Rating: FRM Summary: “You’re coming with us.” Notes: This is a continuation of the last part and something that’s been stuck in my head since before Loki premiered I’ve been dying to write, so I have. Knowledge of Rick & Morty is helpful, but not required. This story has adult content, language, and violence. For length, etc, there’s a Read More:

“Hey!” Mobius waves big, with both arms, to gain the other two’s attention. “I’d like to talk, can we talk? Hey, hellooo!!” With their fighting he’s able to reach the ship before anyone takes note...and it’s the ship.

“Hold it right there, ass-hole.” It’s like being cursed at by an analogue Miss Minutes, if she were a ship with weapons at the ready.

“Woah, woah, hey, what the fuck?!” Rick’s attention snaps to the man. “You don’t just sneak up on a man’s space cruiser!”

The boy leans over. “You don’t just sneak up on a man’s space cruiser, man.”

“What the fuck is wrong with you?!”

“Yeah, what the fuck is wrong with you?” The boy repeats.

Loki exits the saloon, magic at the ready, as weapons appear in Mobius’ direction. For all their rough start in the interrogation, he admired Mobius and did not wish him harm.

The agent’s hands are already up as he back away. “I...I just want to talk!” He tries to make himself out over the other two. “Can we talk?” Then catches sight of Loki approaching. “Loki, stop!”

The order halts Loki in his tracks - it is not said in anger, but concern. This is new, from just about anyone. He lets his magic fade, sending only a bit in the other’s direction. A way to protect, to ensure Mobius’ll not be harmed should the others or their ship turn violent.

“Loki, like the Norse god?” Rick’s eyes narrow towards the being. “Mmm…” He belches. “No wonder he took my shit.”

Morty looks over with interest. “I thought Loki had red hair, Rick?”

Rick huffs. “Multiple universes, multiple Lokis.”

“Well, which one is this?”

“How the hell should I know, you think I follow every Loki? Think I’m some kind of Loki-worshipping fangirl that knows every single one there is out there?” Rick starts to think, calculate and eliminate possibilities. “Looks like the Mousey one.”

“Mousey one?”

“I beg your pardon?” Loki interjects his offense.

Rick pays the god no mind. “Yeah, Mort, you know the one. The one that that mouse-loving company made people fall in love with only to make him progressively weaker and more ridiculous until he’s finally choked out by a giant grape.”

“Oh...yeah...that one.”

If Loki wasn’t so flabbergasted at the commentary, he’d have blasted them both into oblivion.

“Hey, give me back my portal gun, you Mousey son-of-a-bitch!”

Mobius senses the increasing tension, the loss of interest in him. “I have a proposition for you...Rick.”

The elder man turns back to the one standing beside his ship, burps. “Not interested.”

“I think you might be. You’re a man of science, right? Pretty smart guy.”

“I’m not ‘pretty smart’...” Liquor bottles and cans tumble out, spill across the floor, as Rick opens the hatch. “I’m a fucking genius.”

“I know.” Mobius confirms.

Rick scowls, unconvinced, over the mass of liquor bottles. “All right, Brokeback Mobius, thrill me.”

“If looks could kill.” Mobius smiles back, confidently amused. “Here, tell me what you think of this.” He hands the defunct TemPad over.

While Morty shows interest, Rick only gives a cursory look. “Earth-618 TemPad used by the mindless bureaucrats at the Time Variance Authority. It won’t work here.”

“Yeah...we figured that out, but…” The agent shifts, smile remaining. “Maybe you can do something with it.”

“Why?” He tosses it behind him. “I don’t do time travel.”

“No?”

“Time travel’s broke, inter-dimensional space travel’s woke, bro.”

Mobius presses on. “Okay, but someone like you…”

“A genius.”

“Could probably turn it into something else.”

“Sure. I could also turn myself into a pickle or make a robot that gives my grandson nothing but blowjobs and a constant high off Adderall. So what?”

Loki pulls his magic forward, preparing to teleport himself and Mobius in case negotiations go sideways. He’ll not simply hand over the portal gun; something the lad seems to intuit as his eyes set on Loki like a watchdog.

The agent gets up with a sigh. “Never mind, I was wrong thinking you’d want to do anything with a…useless piece of technology.” He collects the TemPad, muttering disappointment. “Probably can’t anyway...”

Rick narrows eyes at him. “Are you trying to bait me? Is that it?”

“No, no…” Yes, yes, he absolutely was. The man reminds Mobius of Loki, utterly brilliant, and completely unable to resist proving himself. “You’re not interested, I respect that.” He tucks the TemPad into his jacket. “Everyone has their limits.”

Rick gets up, bottle in hand. “Hey, fuck you and your not-ginger Loki, I have no limits!”

“Oh, sure you do.“

Morty whines. “Rick, just freeze them or something so we can grab the portal gun and go!”

“How the fuck am I gonna freeze a frost giant, you dumb little son-of-a-bitch?!” Before the boy has the chance to offer an alternative Rick continues. “There’s no fucking way I’m letting some know-nothing pencil pusher with a secret hard-on for a god of pranks...”

The statement flusters Mobius, throws him off his rhythm, as Rick’s rant continues.

“...Think I can’t do something as simple as turning some shitastic time travel device into something actually worthwhile!”

"Then prove us wrong.” Loki jumps in to point Rick in the direction he and Mobius ultimately need. “Make the TemPad something worthwhile, perhaps another portal gun, and we will return yours.”

“Fine!” Rick snaps, then belches into calm. “But I need my lab.”

“Perfectly understandable.” Mobius chimes back in, simply relieved it’s worked. “We’ll stay here until you return. I promise.” A promise he intends to keep, to make Loki keep.

Morty looks to his grandfather, who looks back, before they both burst into laughter. “Yeah, right, how stupid do we look?” The boy was young, not naive.

“You’re -” Rick belches again. “Coming with us.”

Mobius and I both agreed it best he handle this lest someone end up dead, haha! I’m sure Loki and Rick will interact more later and am excited for him and Mobius to meet the rest of the Smith/Sanchez family. After that they’ll either return to a (different) cowboy world or move on...not sure, lol! (And, for anyone curious Morty is about 14 years old.)

All gifs made found on Google, combined by me, credit goes to whoever their OG makers are!

Those who may read: @holykryptonitekitten @lady-crowned-with-stars @ultrarebelheart @chibiyanai @dreamsofapiratelife @biiskuitx @delightfulheartdream @antoniostarshadow13 @mobiusbmobius @zippythewondersquirrel …If you wish to be tagged in future pieces, please let me know!

#loki #loki series #rick and morty #crossover #fanfiction #mobius #loki laufeyson #loki odinson #mobius m mobius #loki x mobius #rick sanchez #morty smith #time variance authority #tva loki #marvel cinematic universe #mcu #cowboy au #my writing #not my gif

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takerfoxx · 3 years

Text

So long as I'm getting caught up on all my stuff, here's the next installment of the Walpurgis Nights girls watch The Rebellion Story, this time stretching from Homura shooting herself in the head to her talk with Sayaka the vague-poster!

Reminder:

G=Gretchen

H=Homulilly

Op=Ophelia

Ok=Oktavia

Ca=Candeloro/Mami

Ch=Charlotte

...

=still screaming=

G: Turn it off, TURN IT OFF!

Ok, panicking: I got it, I got it! Off!

=TV winks out=

Ch: Sweet Christ!

=long pause, and then Gretchen gets up and runs off. Homulilly quickly follows=

Ch: This was a mistake.

Op: What. The fuck?

Ca: I should have known. I should have known it would go this way.

Ch: Candy, there’s no way you could have-

Ca: No! There was! I knew how bad it could get! I knew how far we could have fallen! I shouldn’t have let you guys see any of this.

Ok: It’s not your fault.

Ca: I still should have known. I should have at least screened this!

Ch: Yeah, one of us probably should have.

=another long pause=

Ok: So, uh, are we, like, done?

=suddenly Gretchen reenters the room, followed by Homulilly. They silently return to their seats=

G: Okay. Play it.

Op: Gretch, are you sure?

G: I need to know. I need to know what happens to her. I need to know if we turn out okay. Play it.

=everyone exchanges uncomfortable glances, and then look to Homulilly, who slowly nods=

Ok: Okay, if you say so…

Op: We’d better ease it with the commentary. I mean, this isn’t something we can-

G: No! Please, no. The talking…and the jokes…well, it makes it easier.

Op: Sure.

Ch: It’ll be kind of hard to find anything funny about this.

Ca: We can try to do what we can.

=they start the movie, and silently watch as Homura falls in slow motion, blood and brains spewing out. And then…=

Op: Wait, hold up! How is she still moving?

Ca: As I said, something like that won’t kill her. You would need to destroy her soul gem.

Op: So she can straight up just blow her own head off and walk it off?

Ca: So long as the act of healing didn’t use up too much magic, yes.

H: Okay, but why? Why would I do something like that?

Ca: Let’s find out.

…

Ok: Uh…Ooooh.

H: Oh. Really?

G: What’s going on?

H: I couldn’t get rid of the ribbon on my ankle. Every time I tried to shoot it off, Mami would just grow it back. So I tried shocking her so badly that she wouldn’t think to regenerate the ribbon long enough for her to be caught in the time-stop.

Op: By shooting yourself in the head?!

H: Clearly, I have a considerable amount of emotional issues.

Ch: You know, it’s really starting to concern me how you keep referring to her as yourself just now.

H: I apologize. I will try to differentiate between my alternate selves.

Ok: Oh great, now I’ve gone cross-eyed.

…

Ch: So…this is really uncomfortable. Again.

G: Is she going to shoot Cand-I mean, Mami?

Ca: I mean, there’s clearly a moral struggle.

H: Well. At least I didn’t turn out as a complete sociopath.

Ok: This is seriously gross. Can we just skip this part?

Ca: No.

Ok: But-

Ca: No.

Ok: Okay.

…

Op: In the leg. Well, I guess that’s not as-

Ok: HOLY!

G: What’s happening? What’s going on?

Op: Sweet flames, she’s…a ribbon monster? The fuck?

=pause, and then Charlotte starts laughing hard while Candeloro just sighs=

Ok: Charlotte! Explain! Now!

Ch: She did it! She actually did it!

Ok: Did what?!

Ch: You’ll see!

H: Wow, I am…I mean, she is just all tied up now.

G: Wait, Mami’s there? But I thought…then what was…

Ca: Oh, good grief.

Ok: Wait. Wait a second, you can clone yourself?!

Ca: It’s…not so much a clone as it is a puppet.

Ok: Since when could you do that?!

Ca: Um, well, I had figured it out a short time before our, um, deaths. I was training with Kyo…with Ophelia, and we were practicing with her illusion magic. You know, the duplicates?

Op: Uh-huh.

Ca: Well, she suggested that perhaps I could do something similar with my ribbons, since I could use my ribbons to form other objects. And, well…it worked.

Op: Ooooh. Okay, that’s actually kind of awesome.

H: I was fighting a copy the whole time?! How is that fair?

Ch: You can literally freeze time!

H: Hey, wait. How do you know that she could do that, Charlotte?

Ch: How do you think?

Ca: Like we said: our therapist suggested building positive associations around my change. We had to get creative.

Op: Oh, come on, that’s not fair!

Ok: Wait, you were the one betting on her!

Op: I’m not talking about that! When I do my duplicate trick all I can do with them is give Tavi a show! It’s not like she can touch any of them!

Ok: Babe. Relax. It’s honestly fine.

Op: All I’m saying I should be able to give you a lap dance while the striptease is going on.

G: TMI! TMI!

Ch: You, uh, do know that you can give her the lap dance and let your illusions handle the striptease, right?

Op: Do you know how hard it is to handle two kinds of dancing at the same time when you’re horny?

G: Please, I am begging you to stop!

…

Ch: So…I think someone owes me and Fee-Fee some talents.

Ok: Fight’s not over yet!

Ch: It clearly is…

G: You don’t know that! Maybe Homura will drop a hand-grenade to blow the ribbons up! Or maybe Kyoko will come to save her.

Op: Look, if other-me tags in, that’s an automatic forfeit. This is supposed to be one-on-one, and that clone trick is stretching things as it is.

H: Wait, wait, shut up. Wraiths? What are wraiths?

Ok: Dunno.

Ch: Did we miss something? I get that that nightmares replaced the witches, but what are wraiths?

G: Maybe…after I erased witches, wraiths are what replaced them!

Op: We should’ve just watched the damn show first.

Ch: Do you really think it’ll make things make more sense?

Op: Probably not, but at least we’d know about half of these names!

Ch: Jesus Christ, the fuck is that?

Ok: The sky wants to eat that giant walnut, apparently.

Ch: I can see that, but what does it mean?!

G: I think that’s an eye, actually.

Ok: An eye with teeth.

Ch: None of that answers any of my questions.

Op: Nope, this would still be just as weird even if we watched the show.

…

Ch: And here comes the rescue! Via…fire extinguisher for some reason. Sorry girls, Mami takes this.

Ok: Fine, fine. Thanks a lot, Homulilly.

H: Not my fault. None of us knew about the duplicate thing. I had her beat until then.

Ok: Wait, is that a sword?

Op: Guess it ain’t me with the steel chair, then!

G: Well, of course not. It’s a sword.

Op: That’s not…never mind.

Ok: It’s me! I’m coming in to save you!

H: I’m touched. But…why?

Ok: Because I had fifty talents riding on you, and you let me down.

H: Oh, don’t start.

Op: Wait. That ain’t your voice, Tavi.

Ok: Who else has a sword?!

G: Um, who is that?

Ch: Some kind of kid. Candy, do you recognize her back from before?

Ca: No, I really don’t…

Op: Wait, BEBE?!

Ch: Excuse me?!

H: Um…this is…a turn.

Ca: Don’t look at me, I’m as bewildered as you are.

Ch: Oh, so first I’m a creepy idiot doll, and now I’m a fucking child?!

Op: What is this, some kind of alternate universe bullshit?

Ok: I mean, basically. Uh, you okay over there, Charlotte.

Ch: Nope!

Ok: Wanna take a break?

Ch: Yes!

…

=everyone returns after half-an-hour=

Ch: I think I’ve figured it out.

H: Oh?

Ch: Butterfly effect. Like, okay, in this universe, Madoka somehow erased all witches, right? I mean, made it so magical girls don’t turn into witches anymore, right? And did it all through history, right?

H: Presumably.

Ch: So that means that there has to be major repercussions! Like, like, this girl doesn’t turn into a witch fifty years ago, so she doesn’t eat some random passerby, and that rando goes and marries someone that would have married someone else in the original timeline, so they have a completely different set of kids, so the kids they would have had originally don’t get born! So somewhere down the line, things got all screwy and I ended up being born a few years later!

G: Wow, that actually makes a lot of sense.

Op: I guess we’re all super-lucky that we got born at all. And that the rest of us ended up more-or-less the same. Um, no offense.

Ch: Right. That’s all it is. Different timeline, things happened differently, and I’m a little girl in this world. That’s it.

Ok: So…are you okay with this then?

Ch: Oh, absolutely not! But I can at least deal with it now!

Op: Bet’cha anything that good ol’ Bebe here still has a major crush on Mami.

Ch: Oh, God! Don’t even go there!

Op: I’m just sayin’…

Ca: Ophelia…

Op: Stopping, stopping.

H: Shall we continue?

Ch: Yeah, I guess. I’m gonna need major therapy after all this is over, though.

G: We all will.

…

Ok: Okay, I know this is probably a bad time to point this out, but Sayaka has style!

Op: I mean, you’re not wrong. Look at you, being all effortlessly cool! Not that you aren’t already.

Ok: Nice save there.

Ch: Haha, Sayaka’s got it right! Taking on Mami was a dumb idea. Speaking of which…

Ok: Oh, come on! That clone trick was dirty and you know it!

Ch: Oh, I’m sorry. Are you upset that she so happened to have something that counters Homura’s extremely unfair timestop power?

Op: She’s got a point. A bet’s a bet.

G: All right, I guess it’s official. Mami won.

=Candeloro smirks=

H; You don’t have to be all smug about it.

Ca: True. I don’t.

…

G: Wait…

Op: So, what, Sayaka knows what’s going on?

Ok: Of course I do! I mean, I’m the brains of the bunch!

=Homulilly coughs=

Ok: I heard that.

H: I didn’t say anything.

Ch: Well, finally some exposition!

G: I do sort of wish that she’d just tell Homura what is going on without being so vague about it.

Ok: Look, I’ve been pretty much on the wayside this whole movie. Let me have my monologue.

Ch: What’s she getting at though?

H: Oh.

Ch: Huh?

H: I think…Never mind.

G: What is it?

H: I just had sort of a realization, but I’d rather not say it now.

Op: Eh?

H: Hang on. Let’s just watch a bit more.

…

Op: Jesus, Tavi! No need to show Homura up like that!

Ok: Let! Me! Have! This!

Ch: That was pretty cool, though. Shwing! Stopped her cold!

G: Wait, so one of us is the…

=voice trails off=

G: Is it me?

H: Um…

Op: Oh.

Ok: Oh.

Ch: What? Oh, okay. I get it now.

Ca: I sort of put it together too.

G: What? What are…Oh.

=everyone looks at Homulilly=

H: Well, it only makes sense. I guess.

Ch: You don’t seem all that upset about it.

H: Well, at least I get to become my best self in this movie.

G: But…how though? I thought I erased witches or whatever!

Ok: Let’s find out.

Ch: If your other self can ever get to the point.

Ok: Shhh…

…

Ca: Wait, I’m the witch? Is that what she’s implying?

Ch: Pretty sure that’s just a red herring.

Ok: You know, it’s nice that Sayaka is actually being all sympathetic toward witches. I mean, it’s kind of fucked up, isn’t it? That even the magical girls that know the score still hunt down witches instead of trying to help them.

G: I mean, it can’t really be helped, can it?

Ok: I know, I just like that I’m saying it.

G: The Law of Cycles? What’s that?

Op: Probably whatever trippy business you replaced the witch stuff with.

H: Oh, now I’m finally just saying it out loud! Madoka erased witches. Took us long enough to get to that point.

Op: Wait, sacrificed herself? Only Homura remembers her? What?

Ch: Pretty sure this was all explained in the show.

Op: Well, that’s what we get for watching this first. Should we go back and-

Everyone: No.

Op: Cool.

…

Op: Oh, freaky!

Ok: Wait, so I’m the witch now?

Ch: Could mean that in this timeline you turned into a witch before Madoka did her un-witching…thing.

Ca: That is what you looked like. Right before you became one with Charlotte, I mean.

Ch: Er…

Ok: Phrasing…

Ca: Oh, for Heaven’s sake. It is literally what happened. You turned into a witch while we were fighting Charlotte, and then the two of you fused. Then I became a witch and fused with that witch. And then Ophelia became a witch and we all fused together.

Ok: Yeah, but the way you said it…

…

H: Where’d she go?

Ok: Clumsy? You have the gall to call me clumsy? Who just saved who’s ass, just now!

H: Cut me some slack, it’s been a long evening.

Ch: Y’know you still got blood and brains all over your cheek, right?

H: I am certain that Homura does not care.

Op: I am certain that Homura is about to blow the brains out of the first punk-ass that looks at her wrong right about now.

Ok: Headshots for everybody!

H: Except Madoka.

Ok: Except Madoka. She can be the token un-brain-slushee.

G: Gee. Thanks.

Ca: I’d like to just point out that Homura came very close to turning me into a brain-slushee, but changed her mind.

Op: I doubt she’ll let you off so easy a second time.

Ch: Easy. Hey, may I remind you who won that fight?

H: You’re not going to let that go, are you?

Op: Tell yah what. Losing party treats the winners to dinner at the Tradewinds. Fair?

H: Fair.

Ch: Seriously? With the prices they have down there it’ll be cheaper just to cough up the fifty talents.

G: Yeah, but onion volcanoes!

Ch: Hard to argue with that logic.

Ok: So…on a scale of one to ten, how badly is Homura going to flip out when she realized that she’s the witch.

H: I will accept nothing less than a massacre.

Ok: Cool. Just so long as it’s not of us.

Op: I don’t know. The way this movie is going I wouldn’t be surprised if this turned into a straight-up snuff film.

#WN Rebellion MST

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brekkfast · 4 years

Text

Spoilery rant why one shouldn’t read Eleanor and Park

Source: I am a Korean.

Jesus this book is so racist????? The way I could write an entire thesis on just one (1) piece of evidence alone (for example, Cho Chang had a comeback in the form of a male Asian-American with green, yes, green eyes) but you know, that’d be ignoring The Rest Of The Book which just gets worse and worse.

Aforementioned two-last-names!! (Seriously, what is Park Sheridan?) I am tired. If you’re going to create an East Asian main character, is it that hard to research? We have first names too??? Did Rowell even speak to a Korean when writing this book? This is La Croix level tasteless diversity. Park has green eyes? What? I mean I suck at punnett squares, but boo me, we can’t forget he’s half-white too!! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Okay, but his physical appearance should be the least of our worries right? Wrong.

I??? I’m??? If you see me sobbing it’s because I need the tears to stop me reading this book. The blatant racism that comes from Eleanor is just so demeaning, ignorant, and not funny at all? I don’t understand how this is meant to be relatable and only seems like a shoddy attempt at being ~quirky, look at me im so funny haha causal racism!!~ and instead misses the mark by about an out-of-control huge continent. The fact that Rowell knows that these are racist questions and racist comments, yet continues as if its supposed to be a joke without Park ever being able to defend himself from Eleanor’s ignorance, is really a sign of bad characterisation and wanting ~diversity points~ by barely scraping the surface of discussing how harmful these stereotypes can be. Casual racism/Passive racism is seriously abusive because all people can do is say “Oh it was just a joke, you’re being too sensitive!!” and brush the victims off, gaslighting them into thinking their pain isn’t even worth acknowledging and making them think that this is just American Culture, therefore should be complacent in their dehumanisation in order to assimilate. I feel like with “progressively”-characterised Eleanor, she shouldn’t have half the racist commentary she does (or at all) because, hey not all Americans are racist,,,,,,haha,,,,, The fact that these comments are coming from Park’s love interest is seriously disappointing.

“His mom looked exactly like a doll. In The Wizard of Oz – the book, not the movie –Dorothy goes to this place called the Dainty China Country, and all the people are tiny and perfect. When Eleanor was little and her mom read her the story, Eleanor had thought the Dainty China people were Chinese. But they were actually ceramic, or they’d turn ceramic, if you tried to sneak one back to Kansas.” (Chapter 21)

Hooray Eleanor, comparing a Korean woman to a Chinese character... hooray....also can we stop comparing Asian features to dolls? Objectification and exotification much? (Oh and don’t even get me started on how Park dismissed exotification of Asian women in that “I’m Asian and therefore unattractive” scene. Ugh.)

??What is with Eleanor and her inability to use other adjectives?? Why is him being Asian so significant to her? It just seems so demeaning and dehumanising. Use his last name. I know Eleanor is being sarcastic but I her jokes don’t hit the way she thinks it does. :// Big pass, and big miss. No hits here.

I am bothered. I hate this, the insecurity, the white saviour touch to this, the I-need-validation-from-love-interest, the Rowell-needs-inner-conflict-and-she-chose-the-worst-way-to-represent-it. If you really wanted to make this significant, impactful, and progressive (in the good ol’ year of 1986 [cue the eye rolling]), then you would have made Park realise his attractiveness shouldn’t be contingent on his love interest or anyone else but him. Give the boy some autonomy, please. I feel like I can’t breathe, but maybe Park’s green-ass eyes can convert carbon dioxide into oxygen for me. For a fellow Korean, please, Park, you can save my life with your so very Korean eyes.

tags: racism. Listen, even with my -2948147 eye sight I can see and feel the racism. Cal tried to make one racist joke (yellow fever), and instead made two. Racist mitosis anyone?

And here it is. Listen, I know gender stereotypes and gender roles are somehow the bread and butter of Asian households in both fiction and non-fiction, and I’m not going to deny that it exists. But. Why this one? Why this character. Why write her to behave this way? I hate the way that this only perpetuates stereotypes, and never breaks them down. I hate how this demonises Asian parenting, and the Asian immigrant experience. This to me, only seems like a token conflict point, rather than a well-thought out, nuanced commentary on Asian culture and their perspective on gender roles. The self-racism, the lack of critical thinking skills, the lack of commentary in an obviously commentary-needing scene. The complete ignorance. The glorification of white American culture (kindly represented by Eleanor). There could have been so much you could have done (Park standing up to his mum, scenes of his mum getting that very much needed development arc, the balance between Korean culture/traditions and healthy parenting––because healthy parenting isn’t just Eurocentric you know, it can coexist with Asian tradition [gasp]), but again, shallow and demeaning. Am I surprised at this point? Well, we’re pretty much at rock bottom and I’ve got a pickaxe.

The broken English.

I can’t. “Why she want to look like man? It’s so sad.” I am going to throw something. If you’re going to include the immigrant experience in your book, do it properly, otherwise it’s just racist. You’re making Park’s mum seem stupid, unable to change, a representation of a person who just doesn’t understand American culture and thus deserves no respect. After we’re (the readers) see that Park’s mum understands little about American culture, of its language, and thus will misunderstand and conflict with Eleanor’s very existence, we’re awfully inclined to see her as the somewhat antagonist of the story (especially as she offsets the main couple...in a romance novel, so yeah, antagonist), thus her opinion is invalid and wrong. Ah yes, because parents can’t learn and grow and become better people. This characterisation is the equivalent of nails on a chalkboard.

(Okay this is more of a minor point, but I uh, am very bothered by the doll-like appearance contrasted with the “simply-just beautiful Sabrina.” The only thing shallow here is Eleanor’s love for Park where half of her internal commentary is just pure racism, but haha racism is ~funny~) (C’mon Mindae, you couldn’t have prevented your son having two last names and no first name?)

Eleanor’s racism strikes again!!! Yes girl!! Shame Mindae for only buying brand-names!! Shame her assimilation attempts!! (Only because who knows what would’ve happened if there were Korean side dishes and meals in the fridge. Racism probably. Eleanor @ Kimchi: 👁👄👁) Next time Mindae goes grocery shopping, she should bring Eleanor for her white, American approval!! (Again, with the dumb-ification of Mindae, I hate it here. What was that Sofia Vergara quote from Modern Family?

Yeah, Eleanor, do you even know how smart Mindae is in Korean? :////)

God, Rowell, I’m begging, I’m on my knees, please don’t ever think about creating another character like Park ever again. I hated this journey and how it made me feel. Please, if you’re going to write a Korean-American character, have a Korean-American beta-reader. Rowell is trying to create a third-culture-kid and Asian immigrant experience, which aren’t stories for her to tell. This is exactly what happens when you don’t do the research for your own story (you can tell she barely put any effort into it). Instead, she perpetuates harmful stereotypes and further isolates Asian immigrants from interacting and being comfortable with American culture. Why should we, when we’re simply shamed for it? For just one extra editor, you can save another Asian character from having no first name. Just dial 888-google-it-god-888, today.

#rant #anti eleanor and park #anti park sheridan #anti eleanor douglas #i #how was this published #the racism?#just stick to fangirl please #listen im not saying you needed to make this political #im just saying you needed to make this not racist #i get it #its a love story #but the way my heart is broke #man :///#mine

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mychemicalxmen · 4 years

Text

I'm writing a sitcom in my mind about the adventures of the Hargreeves Exes Support Group and now I’m gonna make it everyone else’s problem

-This is a world that is pretty much based on this hc and complaint with the tags of this one.

-Basically, time works differently in the afterlife. Once you die, you can watch over any point forward from that date. Unless, of course, you’re following a time-traveler, like Ben to Klaus. But the rules are fast and loose and easily bent to meet whatever shenanigans are taking place. If this were a real fic or show, there would probably be a running gag about how flexible the rules are. But ghosts tend to watch things chronologically as to not get too mentally exhausted. -Also, there’s two levels. You can watch from afar - like, in some fantastical place within the Bike Girl’s Greyscale Hell Zone - or you can haunt on the same plane as living humans, like Ben and most of the ghosts Klaus can talk to do. Ghosts can move back and forth between the two.

So. Pilot. In an au where this scene did in fact happen in the Day That Was but Klaus still failed: -Klaus is still a little intoxicated when Diego is tying him up in the attic, and even if he wasn’t, it takes real effort to focus in on any one ghost. So he doesn’t see that Eudora’s been following Diego around all morning, shortly after her death, still pleading Diego to let go of his vengeance trip but gradually learning she’s powerless to get through to him. -So she watches helplessly, sitting on a box a few feet away, holding back tears as Diego and Klaus are having their heart-to-heart about the people they’ve loved and lost. -She suddenly glances up and sees another bitch with another bloody chest wound doing the exact same Manly Cry on the other side of the scene. -and it’s just

-They make eye contact and Dave is a total deer in headlights. There is so much “what the fuck is your story” in both of their eyes but they wordlessly realize “now’s not an awesome time, I should just shut up and make sure my ex-boyfriend isn’t about to go ballistic, cool cool, but we’re definitely gonna talk later.”

-after that whole scene is wrapped, they finally meet somewhere, and their minds are running with “who the hell are you what the hell are our idiots doing what the hell is wrong with this family what is happening”

-but what ends up coming out is “so........... how’d you get shot?”

-and yeah. they get talking. they’re really fascinated with each others’ eras. they actually find a few odd little common interests. they keep hanging out more and more. and they really need someone to talk to about the impact left on them by this weird ass family.

So. Ghost bros.

-My first hc was like this, but they have a lil private screening room in the Greyscale Hell Zone where they chill out with snacks and watch life go by. And following the Hargreeves as they slowly cause the 2019 apocalypse is god awful to watch but so fun to bitch along to like it’s a bad sports game. -Diego will throw himself through Harold’s window and Eudora will just grumble “you dumb slut” from within a fortress of cushions and then rant about this one really stupid and embarrassing thing he did in police academy one time and she’ll be deadpan furious and Dave won’t stop laughing through the entire story.

-Luther locks Vanya up even though all the siblings are like “please don’t do that” and Eudora and Dave are just screaming.

-After an eternity of pestering, Eudora reads Dune. Because, hell, she has the time now. In return, she makes Dave read the book that made her want to be a detective when she was in high school. Ghost Book Club, y’all.

-I also alluded to this before, but Eudora keeps trying out Cool Modern Nicknames on Dave. He pretends to hate it. She especially loves D-Kat, pronounced “Dee Cat”.

-Sometimes Dave will make the most ridiculously outdated reference or use the most absurdly 60′s slang and Eudora will drag him so hard over it.

-Most of what I imagine is their salty-ass MST3K-style commentary on the second half of s1 and then s2.

-And of course, one day, a woman will appear at the door. She will have passed away at her wife’s side in 2013 after a long and happy life. She will be back in the form she embodied in her prime, curly blonde hair framing her youthful face, and see a female cop and an absolutely shredded soldier from two very distinct eras of her life, sitting in the dark eating Twizzlers.

-“Um.... hello? Sorry to barge in, uh, that little girl on the bicycle pointed me this way... not really sure why. I’m still tryin’ to get my bearings around this place.”

-“Ah shit, ‘Dora, we got another one.”

#tua #the umbrella academy #diedora #klave #Hargreeves Exes Support Group #the final plot twist is that Dave remembers Sissy from the hardware store one time like five years before he died #he's like 'oh it's Lavender Daydream for your laundry room' and Eudora's like 'I'm sorry what'

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just-random-obsessions · 4 years

Text

Funny Moments In Thor The Dark World

Find Thor 1 here

Find Avengers 1 here

This is the second part of me watching all three thor movies and the avengers movie and comparing the humor pre-ragnarok to the humor in the 3rd Thor movie. And, as before, I’m writing this on my computer where the I and U keys don’t work so sorry for any spelling mistakes.

Tag List: @nikkoliferous @fyrecrafted @lokijiro @miskiett @darthxerik @icyxmischief @iamanartichoke @juliabohemian @official-and-unstable-satan @melodylnoelle @just-another-human-2019 @fandomsfanfiction @mentallydatingahotcelebrity @cateyes315 @burningarbiterheart @imnotacreepijustlikeyou @usedtobegoodfriend96 @alexakeyloveloki

Official-and-unstable-satan and fandomsfanfiction weren’t tagged sry

Anyone who wants to be added/removed to the tag list please let me know! and if I missed someone please also let me know. Sorry this post is so long

~ “Hello Mother. Have I made you proud?”

~ “Please don’t make things worse” “Define worse”

~ “I really don’t see what all the fuss is about”

~ “Just like you”

~ *That smile!!!!*

~ “I’ve got this completely under control!” “Is that why everything’s on fire?”

~ *About the Scary MonsterTM: “All yours”

~ *Thor says hi to the Big Scary MonsterTM*

~ “I accept your surrender”

~ “Anyone else?” *All the people simultaneously: NOPE*

~ “Perhaps next time we should START with the big one”

~ *Odin obviously shipping Thor and Jane* (idk I got a kick out of this)

~ *Jane awkwardly avoiding her date*

~ *Date: hi*

~ *Him awkwardly talking about his ex*

~ “And the fact that she kept sleeping with other men” “NO!”

~ *Darcy being mistaken for a waitress*

~ *Darcy mouthing “Cute” to Jane about Richard*

~ *Darcy embarrassing Jane by talking about Thor*

~ “Is there a point to all of this cause there REALLY needs to be a point to all of this”

~ “That’s what I said!”

~ “That’s what I did!”

~ “He’s not interested” “I’m interested” (Am I the only one who feels like his awkwardness was actually kinda cute?)

~ “He’s my intern.” “You have an intern?”

~ *Intern is fucking adorable like Richard*

~ “I have totally mastered driving in London!” *Has not mastered it at all*

~ *Selvig running around Stonehenge naked*

~ *Darcy keeps calling Ian ‘Intern’*

~ *Darcy calls Jane cause she didn’t wanna shout*

~ God I fucking love Darcy she’s so criminally underrated

~ “I am not getting stabbed in the name of science”

~ “It’s okay, we’re Americans!” “Is that supposed to make them like us?”

~ “We’re scientists-well I am” “Thanks”

~ “That doesn’t seem right”

~ “I wanna throw something! Jane give me your shoe!”

~ *Jane ignores Darcy*

~ “Give me your shoe”

~ “Were those the car keys?”

~ *Ian’s face when he realizes he threw the car keys to another planet*

~ *If you have to bury so many people then you’re doing something wrong you hot dumb fuck* (I mean that’s basically what Heimdall said right?)

~ “Typical” *after being left behind while Jane goes to talk to her boyfriend*

~ *Jane! Love of my life and most talented and beautiful person in the world oh how I love yo-SLAP*

~ “As excuses go, its not terrible”

~ “I know” “You do?” “Do what?”

~ *Darcy interrupts the KissTM*

~ “Um I’m pretty sure we are getting arrested”

~ “How’s space?” “Space is fine”

~ “He’s my intern… My intern’s intern”

~ “Holy shit!” (after Jane went up in the Bifrost)

~ *Heimdall calmly dodges the car*

~ “We have to do that again”

~ “Hello”

~ “What’s that?”

~ “It’s a soul forge” *No I’m pretty sure that’s a quantum field generator*

~ *Jane being ready to fight Odin for comparing her to a goat*

~ “You told your dad about me?”

~ “It must be so inconvenient, them asking about me day and night”

~ “Please meet my mother” *Jane shies away from Thor*

~ Loki casually tossing the thingamajig in the air like the cute little shit he is

~ Lord, he’s so damn pretty

~ *Kurse being like: Lol I ain’t touchin’ that boy with a ten foot pole*

~ “It’s as if they resent being in prison”

~ “There’s no pleasing some creatures”

~ *Loki calmly reading a book while all Hel breaks loose*

~ “You have my word that no harm will come to yo-” nvm bitch die

~ *THAT look between Sif and Jane*

~ *Frigga immediately seeing through Odin’s bs lies*

~ *Heimdall: I have defeated the big space ship!! The bigger one behind him: Bitch you thought*

~ “WITCH!!!!” *Now I know who Loki gets his amazing aforementioned smile from*

~ *Selvig using shoes to explain complicated science*

~ *Selvig then using pencils*

~ “Any questions?” “Yeah, can I have my shoe back?”

~ “What’s SHIELD?” “It’s a secret”

~ *Darcy’s cute af face when she sees that Selvig is in the mental hospital*

~ “Are you sure you wouldn’t just rather punch your way out?”

~ *Loki shapeshifting into the guard*

~ “Mmm Brother, you look ravishing”

~ “Costumes a bit much”

~ “So tight!”

~ “I can FEEL the righteousness surging!!”

~ “HEY wanna have a rousing discussion about truth?”

~ “Honor?”

~ “Patriotism?”

~ “GOD BLESS AMERICA!”

~ “At last. A little common sens-”Bitch are you really fucking kidding me? (What do you mean that’s not what he said?)

~ “I thought you liked tricks”

~ “I’m Loki, you may have heard of-” SLAP

~ “That was for New York”

~ “I like her”

~ *Loki gazing lovingly at Jane in the background*

~ “Betray him, and I’ll kill you.” “It’s good to see you too Sif”

~ “If you even think about betraying him-” “You’ll kill me? Evidently there will be a line”

~ “I thought you said you knew how to fly this thing.” “I said how hard can it be?”

~ “Whatever your doing brother I suggest you do it faster.” “Shut up Loki

~ “You must’ve missed something.” “I didn’t, I’m pressing every button on this thing”

~ “Well don’t hit it. Just press it, gently.” “I aM pReSsInG iT gEnTlY AND ITS NOT WORKING!!!”

~ *Thor starts slamming buttons and it starts working*

~ *Volstagg: Oh fighting is much fun- OH SHIT IM FALLING!! HELP!!!*

~ “I think you missed a column.” “Shut up”

~ “Why don’t you let me take over? I’m clearly the best pilot”

~ *Bitch I’m the one who can actually fly*

~ “Oh dear. Is she dead?”

~ *Thor knocks over a column* “Not a word”

~ “Now they’re following us”

~ “Now they’re firing at us”

~ “Yes thank you for the commentary Loki, it’s not at all distracting”

~ “Well done, you just decapitated your grandfather”

~ *Seriously, whoever wrote the escape scene is a genius!!!*

~ *Loki yelling at Thor about how thIs was a bad idea you dumb fuck- wait wtf are you doing AAAAHHHHH!!!!1*

~ “You lied to me. I’m impressed”

~ *That smile again snfnejaihfeqrqrsbdsalxdjewonjfeq*

~ “For Asgard!” YEET

~ “Nothing personal boys!”

~ “If it were easy, everyone would do it”

~ “Are you mad?” “Possibly”

~ “TADAAA”

~ “Oh yeah, my father. Eric Selvig”

~ “And these” “yeah… those”

~ “How did you find me?” “You were naked on television”

~ “I don’t get paid enough. I don’t get paid at all”

~ “What’s happening? Birds? Birds are happening?”

~ “All right are you ready?” “I am”

~ *phone rings* “It’s not me”

~ “Why are there so many shoes in here?”

~ “I’ll just text her”

~ “So who’s Richard?”

~ *Thor hanging his hammer on a coat hanger*

~ “Where are your pants?” “Oh he says it helps him think”

~ “Loki is dead” “Oh thank God!”

~ “Better get my pants”

~ “Do you even know what these things do?” “No” “…Neither do I”

~ “Ooh get the guy with the sword!”

~ “Oops”

~ *Ian’s high-pitched scream*

~ *Does car insurance cover My Car Was Sucked Into Another Planet Due To A Cosmic Event That Only Occurs Once Every 5000 Years or no?*

~ *Thor and Malekith fighting between worlds and poor little Mjolnir trying to keep up*

~ *The two of them against windows*

~ *AAAHHH*

~ *Awww! Look at the cute little Jotunheim monster! He’s so adorable I wanna pet him so much!’

~ *Darcy and Ian kissing after he saved her life*

~ “Darcy?” “Jane!” “Ian?” “Selvig.”

~ “Myuh Myuh!!”

~ *Thor ends up on the subway*

~ *The girl taking 50 photos*

~ *Thor and the woman colliding into eachother*

~ “I’ve come to accept your surrender”

~ *Malekith gets crushed by his own ship. Now that’s some lovely karma right there*

~ *Darcy and Ian go back to kissing*

~ “He kinda committed treason on our way out” oops

~ Jotunheim Puppy chasing birds

Wow I’m so sorry this was so long. But guess what? It’s gonna get even longer. Sorry, again.

So one of the differences between the first and second Thor movies is that Thor 2 has humor in the climax whereas Thor 1 doesn’t. This is because of the differences with who is the villain. In Thor 1, Thor is having to fight his brother. To quote Avengers, they “played together and fought together” for several millennia. Of course there’s not going to be any humor in it cause there shouldn’t be. The climax at the end of the movie isn’t supposed to be some epic battle between the forces of Good TM and Bad TM. It’s supposed to be tragic that he’s having to fight his own brother because Loki lost his mind due to so many factors. The last joke in the film is “You’re an amazon liar brother, always have been” “It’s good to have you back”. There’s nothing else till the end credit scene. That’s because Kenneth Branagh knew that this was supposed to be viewed at as being sad a hopeless, not some awesome upbeat battle.

Thor 2 on the other hand, is exactly that. Thor has known Malekith for.. what? 2 days? Maybe 3? His relationship and dynamic with Malekith is different than with his brother. To Thor, this is just another enemy attacking Asgard. And I’m not sure whether this was intentional or not (because I remember reading somewhere how Allen Taylor had a bitch of a time in the editing process so I think the movie came out different than he intended) but the lack of any personal relationship will Malekith means the film can make really funny jokes and still have it fit with the film. If anything, I might even argue that the humor helped the film to maintain a very nice positive vibe. Idk I can’t think of the right words to explain it but the jokes actually fit the film very well.

However, then we move on to Ragnarok. With Ragnarok, Thor is fighting his sister. While (just like Malekith) he has only known her for two days, that still doesn’t take away the fact that he is having to fight his sibling. And I’m not a film director but if I had the option of approaching this situation and taking it the Thor 1 route or the the Thor 2 route, I’d go with Thor 1. Because it’s actually incredibly tragic that Hela has been driven to insanity like Loki (though ok a different level) due to Odin’s shitty parenting. She is the horrible way she is because Odin made her that way. And that could’ve been an AMAZINGLY complex story with the audience feeling so much sympathy for Hela like we did with Loki in Thor 1, but the narrative just falls flat for two reasons. 1) Taika admitted he didn’t want the film to be emotionally complex so 2) The humor in the climax completely detracts from the seriousness of the situation.

Also, some side notes: Yes, this is edited from the original. I accidentally deleted everything and then had to go back and add everything back in. So I also had to re-tag people too. And I also added a bit more explanation at the end. I meant to do so when I originally posted but it never got done till now. Sry. Also sry that it’s so long

#dr badass jane foster #anti ragnarok #anti thor ragnarok #my meta #thor the dark world #thor 2 #thor #loki

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anxiety-trademark · 3 years

Text

The week in review:

Raw 09/21 NXT 09/23 NXT UK 09/24 Smackdown 09/25 Clash of Champions 09/27 + Main Event 09/24

Raw:

Billie’s not wrong. None of these people are wrong. That title has fallen so fucking far since Becky held it, Jesus.

Interesting to see Billie Kay be somewhat (?) supportive of Peyton. Manager?

I implore women to stop using red eyeliner unless you’re trying to look possessed.

Oh at least Mickie’s gonna have her last match with her snazzy pants on.

God that theme music is so outdated.

If there was one person on the roster that could convince me they wrestled in the Diva’s era, it’d be Mickie James.

Beautiful Octopus, dare I say best in the division. Look at those crossed legs. Just beautiful, Zelina.

Man it was cool watching Zelina reverse the powerbomb attempt into a rollup, but Mickie couldn’t be bothered to get her shoulders down for a 2 count before the reversal. Shame.

Zelina needs an increase to her speed to pull off the style she’s going for, but it’s a fun style.

oof I think Mickie actually caught Zelina’s forehead with that high kick.

Seated Senton off the top rope is garbage and I hate it.

Lmfao Zelina won with a backstabber. She’s literally Sasha-lite. Okay.

Word was Bianca was the star of the pc combine, right? So if you wanna showcase her strength, do it against someone I fucking know lmao. Who was this bro? Of course she’s stronger than a nobody in the pc. Friggin Alexa Bliss can effortlessly give piggy back rides to Sheamus. That’s impressive, because I know how strong and big he is. This could’ve been done better is all I’m saying. Maybe do a sitdown interview with her pc peeps hyping her up, or show footage of her blowing everyone in the combine out the park. Idk.

Ruby stop hyping up Nia and Shayna individually, individually they suck lol lesbireal.

So did Ruby just give Liv her shirt? …You know what, it works, I’m not gonna dig into this.

I feel like all women use the same starting moves against Nia and it’s a little tired ngl. They do this headscissors into a standing crucifix hold, and then slide down to try and roll her up. Then she picks them up and headbutts them. Come on peeps.

Mk just throw Lana through another table, she’s as useless in the ring (kf wise) as Liv is on commentary (non-kf wise)

Let me rewind, how did Nattie get taken out this time? A punch again. COOL. Nattie confirmed worst tag partner in the history of the division.

Lmfao rip Lana. Bye.

Wow we just said fuck entrances huh? Ugh God. Imagine Becky not getting an entrance as a damn champion.

So Peyton forgoes jumping for the German suplex, which could’ve resulted in her landing on Asuka’s head, and her reaction is to laugh. Consummate professional. Becky Lynch’s optic cranial nerve injury (caused by a failed German suplex) called, it can’t seem to find the humor.

Idk what that double underhooked move was by Peyton, but it was nice.

What bothers me about Peyton’s spinning heel kick, is as high as she gets it, she only hits people with her calf. Awkward to see.

That attempted transition into the Asuka Lock was... something.

Highlight: Lana going through the table

---

NXT:

Did Tegan say “why me” to Candice fucking her knee up with a metal pipe? Somebody get this girl some tissues.

Haha watching Tegan writhe in pain is funny. Candice gets points. And I do not like giving Candice points.

Really appreciate Rhea’s theme after hearing so much generic garbage lately. She’s so done with nxt as a performer, she has passed literally all of them by.

Not to be that person, but seeing so many people in the ring together bothers me. If one person was sick, literally all of them are sick now. It’s just kinda yikes.

Did they forego having a crowd? If so, wise. There’s enough ppl in the ring and at ringside.

Rhea fucking yeeted that girl into the barrier lmaooo.

“...Marina Shafir who’s done some great things on Raw Underground recently,” lmao sure.

The absolute half-assed attempt by that girl to pull herself up before Rhea booted her down to the floor was questionable.

So adding all these random peeps from the pc to this battle royal was done solely to have Raquel and Rhea flex for their feud in 4 months, huh.

Kacy does cool shit, wbk lmao. Gets kicked out, lands on her back, rolls into a handstand, rotates, pulls herself up into the ring using her feet on the ropes; gets kicked out, lands on the side of the guardrail, pulls herself up, uses the plexiglass to help balance herself, jumps onto the stairs; gets kicked out, lands on the side of the guardrail, stands on Kayden’s shoulders and gets chauffeured back to the ring. Brilliant. Would be overkill in a Royal Rumble, but it works here.

R&R eliminate each other/themselves together. Fitting. Dakota “help me I’m useless on my own” Kai is shook.

Why is Indi in the top 5? Or top 7? How is this girl so damn prestigious??

Kacy really just slung herself around the ringpost. I’m becoming a fan of her antics/performances in multiwomen matches.

I see Shotzi’s character is, “I come so close yet cannot manage to touch the gold.” I feel for her... cuz I can’t stand Candice.

Boooo

I love how Io carries herself. She’s a shining example of not allowing her heritage to hold her back or make her feel unimportant. She responds in Japanese, and without missing a beat, translates in perfectly spoken and quick English. Never dances, never smiles, never looks like a chump. Serious and answers the damn question. She gets points.

Highlight: Kacy shenanigans

---

NXT UK:

Lol I love KLR so much. Just ducks out of the ring the first time she’s bested.

“KLR is well versed in mental manipulation,” that she is. She’s honestly a top competitor in that sense; equal to the likes of Sasha and Charlotte when it comes to psychology.

Piper’s got power. Ragdolling KLR here.

That’s right, performing with Charlotte Flair at wm is an accolade one can only hope to achieve (I’m annoying I know) no but seriously, KLR vs Becky Lynch? Take my money.

Nice Superkick, nice Tornado ddt.

Dear ref, stop yelling at her and restart the count. Dweeb.

Lmao self inflicted wreckage of her knee.

This ref is a walking headache. We’re now getting into the autumn of overbooked women’s matches. And UK’s first title match back. Yikes.

That senton was awkward and looked painful af for KLR’s neck. If you’re gonna risk that move while selling a leg injury, make sure you have more space to correct your landing.

I almost wish that turnbuckle came undone naturally because KLR is already such a good seller, but I’m gonna assume this is a worked move since it’s been left exposed.

Yeah see there are issues with that spot. Positives: KLR didn’t purposefully undo the turnbuckle, so it’s not on her to give another title match; the spot has potential, as I’m guessing that would be genuinely painful. Negatives: Piper is too big of a woman to hit the lower turnbuckle doing the cannonball, so she ended up hitting the middle... which was padded. Good ending on paper if you don’t do the equations, but poor execution. Not Piper nor KLR’s fault though.

Slow pacing and I hate overbooked garbage, but this obviously isn’t the only match they’re having so *shrug*

Highlight: Clean tornado ddt, and I do love KLR’s selling

---

Smackdown:

Lol Bayley has her chair. She automatically gets a point every time I see it.

Top of the ramp this time? Okay, sure.

Stop cutting to the fancams, production. I don’t care about their reactions.

A fine enough promo to move along both of her angles, but production sucks. Wbk though.

“...one of the most complex personalities,” which personality of Alexa’s are we referring to, though?

Their timing on her pyro was off and now I’m sad. The pops during the breakdown leading into the fountains are fucking amazing and honestly cannot be topped by any of the other women.

When did Alexa stop wearing her gloves to the ring? Probably when she turned face. Shame.

She just called Lacey bitter, southern tea, and you know what? What a fucking drag. Imagine bitter southern tea. As someone who was raised in the south, that is a disgrace to southern tea. Sweet sun tea or pass.

Look at Alexa: selling Lacey’s strength, full of agile speed, and yet here’s Lacey not even bothering to put her shoulders down for her pin attempt. SAD.

A problem I consistently have with SD in particular is how they set up commercial breaks. They always do something dramatic, cut to commercial, come back and shit’s always completely different. How you gonna cut from Alexa leading and hearing the Fiend’s laugh, to return to Lacey in charge ???

Dear Cole, why are you calling her Alexis lol. Like I know that’s her real name but, hello??

oof Alexa’s midsection is beet red.

Lacey has not been putting on a “clinic” stop tossing that term around, Cole. Good bump by Alexa though.

Love how Lacey doesn’t mind landing flat when her moonsault misses. Respect. Her and Charlotte both eat that so perfectly.

LOVE how the monitors of people turned into Fiend’s face. POINTS.

It’s like she’s reverted back to her heel persona. This is literally 2016 Bliss, right? Right??

Roman is a large, strong, intimidating guy... but holy shit the visual of 5′1 Alexa staring daggers into the back of his head is intense af. I almost complained that he cut off her exit, but well done with the continuity.

Highlight: I’m really digging the Alexa/Fiend story

---

Clash of Champions:

Loving the red roots, hate the eyeshadow.

See, if Asuka wants to fuck around in the ring, you won’t hear me complain. I just wish she took her non-wrestling segments more seriously.

The patience Asuka gave Zelina to set up the arm kick was dumb.

“A hard arm bar by Asuka,” he says, even though her legs were completely bent. Easy on the credit given plz.

Zelina telegraphs too much. None of the bumps she takes ever catch me by surprise.

In the spirit of being fair, put your fucking shoulders down and let her attempt a pinfall, Asuka.

Haha Sasha-lite did meteora in the corner.

Nice roll into a kick, half point for Zelina.

No you don’t get to sell frustration or disbelief yet, that’s not buyable.

I don’t know wtf Zelina was going for with that counter before the Asuka Lock, but honestly idc. Could’ve been a kickoff match indeed. State of Becky’s title btw.

Every week it’s the same shit with Asuka. She gets on the mic, speaks Japanese, barely accomplishes anything, then gets interrupted/slapped/attacked... with dancing and smiling inbetween. I really wish she was more like Io.

Nikki isn’t “medically cleared to compete”, and the tag team titles aren’t being defended. My memory is fuzzy but wasn’t there some covid concerns going around back then? Was that just baseless speculation?

Love that Bayley turned this into an opportunity to be a bigger douche than she already was lol.

IS SHE DOING A VICTORY LAP LMAO

I want to hate this from a smarky “give other women a chance” perspective, but Bayley is an ass and this is great for Asuka to build credit as a face, and after being made to look foolish yet again. Lesgo.

Lol sounded like Bayley said, “you think you can cuck me?” I’m sure she didn’t. I’m choosing to believe she did though.

I never know exactly who to blame when Asuka’s Codebreaker looks ugly, but I swear Charlotte is the only one it looks impactful with. Sell job isn’t the problem, but taking that actual move is always dicey af.

Great kick by Asuka. Rekt.

Bayley says nah fuck this rofl. Fair ending; a fun little sprint of meaningless jabs.

“Chairwoman of SD” I like that too, Graves. Points to you.

LMAOOO Bayley set that shit up perfectly kekekek what’s up Sasha.

She be looking fucking incredible, but that neckbrace is a mega bummer.

Character wise, I’m surprised Bayley’s choosing to dole out punishment rather than taking her title and bolting.

Welp maybe she should have, Sasha going to town lmao.

oof peep that red line going down Bayley’s arm. eesh. Welts all over her back.

Highlight: Sasha beating the shit out of Bayley with a kendo stick

---

*BONUS*

Main Event:

You don’t pan the camera over to fucking commentary during Bianca’s entrance. Do better @ production.

Ruby puts her confidence in Liv even though everybody knows Bianca is winning this match lmao.

LOVE Liv’s boots.

like 20 seconds into the match and it’s already 10x better than the Bianca vs Billie Kay one. Don’t even waste a spot on Main Event for Billie Kay. No, I’m not not sorry for saying that.

It’s not that I hold issue with Bianca’s showboating or mannerisms, but it’s all so much more fitting for a heel.

Beautiful stalling suplex, but Liv is rather small.

Beautiful distance on that dropkick to Liv. Liv gets points for throwing herself so far.

We have enough women who rip their shirts off deep into matches, me thinks. Don’t need it from Liv as well.

Momentum could’ve been split better, but that was a decent match.

---

*Clash of Champions would be my highlighted event mostly thanks to Bayley, but if that’s a cop out, I’ll give a slight nod to Smackdown’s handling of Alexa.

#wwe #issa review #feel free to ignore these #cuz who tf cares lesbihonest #today's props goes to:#bayley

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flowerx-lovex · 4 years

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adore 🌟🍃 -Billie Eilish fic-

This was requested by @bratyee and it was such a good ass request ✨ i blow ass bc im so mfing slow I’m sorry 🥺🥺 btw lets say your ass is on stranger things and your best friend is Clairo bc i love her ass💀 basic I know but ily

New text from:

Claire🦋

Claire🦋: oh my god y/n have you fucking seen the interview where billie says your her celeb crush??? omfgggggg

Me: dude what??

Claire🦋: here I’ll send you the link you’re gonna flip tf out (link)

I open the link which takes me to a video of billie and an interviewer from teen vogue

It starts out with her answering questions about her music and what she plans on doing in the future and then it gets to more personal questions

“So we really want to know... who is your celebrity crush?” The interviewer asks her, Billie starts to blush and smirks a little

“Um y/n y/l/n no cap I’m serious I’ve had a crush on her ass since the very beginning of stranger things ugh she could GEETTT ITTTT” she starts laughing

“Oh my god” I say out loud, is she actually serious?

For a couple of months now, ever since ST3 came out, she’s been subtweeting/not so subtweeting about her crush on me which I’ve completely returned the favor too, I mean she’s billie fucking eilish and she’s hot as fuck of course I’m going to flirt back with her even if it’s on public social media

We haven’t talked or anything, I’ve wanted to reach out and say something but my shy ass could never

Some fans have caught on, but some haven’t, and of course the ones who haven’t certainly know now

I immediately close the video and go onto twitter to see if there is any commentary about the interview.. and of course... there is

‘Billie x y/n’ is trending on twitter, shit

I bite my lip and decide to message Claire back

Me: is this shit for real?

Claire🦋: i know it’s crazy asf you two HAVE to meet

Me: are you shitting me? how??

Claire🦋: message her on insta?? duh??

Me: oh shit lmao you right

I quickly go to Instagram but then stop myself, wait what the fuck do I even say? I don’t want to sound weird. What if I say something creepy and then she thinks I’m-

*ding*

Oh shit

billieeilish: hi... so you have probably seen the interview and we are trending rn im sorry if that shit made you uncomfortable

Me: omfg no actually I’m not uncomfortable at all, I’m flattered babe really

billieeilish: are you sure?

Me: very! tbh I’ve had a crush on you since your first album came out 🥺

billieeilish: deadass? you should have said something dude!

Me: ME? omfg im shy asfff and I saw you posting shit about me why didn’t YOU say something?

billieeilish: ...lmao i was scared you’re pretty as fuck

Me: we should like go on a date or some cute shit like that... jk unlessssss

billieeilish: oh my fuck yesssss we definitely should go on a date what are you doing tomorrow??

Me: literally nothing omfg am I actually going to see your ass tomorrow?

billieeilish: do you like coffee shops? let’s go to civil coffee their shit is soooo good and no one ever goes there

Me: adore them

billieeilish: then yeah tf you are seeing my ass tomorrow im about to fall the fuck over i can’t believe I’m going to meet you

Me: aww omfg same 🥰🥰🥰 give me a time and I’ll be there babe

billieeilish: is 10am okay?

Me: it’s perfect I’ll see you there yeah?

billieeilish: of course 🖤

Holy shit this is actually happening, I’m actually going to see her

I text Claire screenshots of the chat and she is legit flipping her shit but then again so am I.

This will be very interesting

*next day*

I drive to the little coffee shop in the lowkey part of town and park in a little parking spot in front of the shop there is hardly anybody here except like 2 old peop- oh my fuck I see her, she’s in the back and she’s sitting alone, aww she looks nervous ugh and I’m already shaking, why am I shaking? She’s a human just like I am... a really cute human, who I happen to have a massive crush on shit okay just chill the fuck out, take a deep breath... let’s go

I get out of my car and take another very shaky breath

I open the shop door and hear a little ding as it opens basically telling everyone I’m here.

Billie looks up when she hears the ding, our eyes meet and she smiles really big, I smile back and wave

I quickly walk over to the table and sit across from her

She’s even prettier in person, her eyes are the most gorgeous shade of blue and she has such a calm yet bold presence, it’s hard to explain but I’m already catching major feels and we haven’t even spoken yet

“Hi i was wondering if i could get your autograph I’m a huge fan” I say jokingly, my cheeks hurt so bad from trying not to smile too hard

She bites her lip, I can see she’s also trying not to smile like a crazy person either

“I can’t believe I’m actually in front of you right now I mean shit oh my god you’re real.” She said laughing, I can see her checking me out, in a flattering way and in an analyzing way

“I hope I didn’t disappoint.” I say and wink, she shakes her head and smirks

“You’re pretty as fuck like my heart hurts oh my god I know that sounds fucking corny.” She says, she smiles and rolls her eyes

“Shush stop you’re gonna make me blush and then I’m going to get really red and ew.” I say with a smile and look away from her for a moment

We talk about a bunch of different things, her music, what she did when she was little, what I did when I was little, why I got into acting, what I think about social media, what she likes and dislikes and a bunch of other random topics. It doesn’t hit me that we’ve been talking for legit hours until I hear a phone.

It’s her phone that starts to ring, she looks at the the screen and then to me

“Oh shit it’s finneas um can you give me a second babe?” She asks me, my heart does a little jump at the nickname

“Of course.” I say with a nod and smile, she smiles back then gets up to go to the bathroom.

I wait there for a couple minutes before she comes back, she doesn’t sit down tho

“I’m so sorry but I have to go, finneas just told me that I have some dumb ass interview tomorrow and I totally forgot about it.” She tells me, my smile drops

I get up from the chair I was in so we are now a little bit closer and face to face

“Okay um do you maybe want to get together again someti-“ she cuts me off before I can finish my sentence

“Uh Fuck yessss” she says, I laugh and nod

“Okay just text me yeah.” I tell her, she nods and bites her lip

I’ve been staring at her lips the entire time we’ve been here, am I honestly THAT whipped already? It’s only been 3 hours

She notices me staring and smirks a bit

“Follow me.” She says, she grabs my hand and our fingers interlock, I follow her as we go out the back door of the coffee shop and we stop at her car

“Get in babe.” She says, I smile and feel my heart start to beat a little faster

I get inside the car and start to laugh a little “What about finneas and your interview?” I ask her still giggling

She also starts to laugh and rolls her eyes

“He’ll have to come find my ass I guess and honestly fuck that interview they just ask you the same shit over and over.” She jokes

After we both got done laughing and calmed down we then sat in a comfortable silence

I can feel the tension growing a little

I look over a little to see her hand resting on her thigh, the rings on her fingers look so good... she looks so good, I bite my lip and start feeling bold

“I honestly really like you.” I say with a slight laugh, the laugh gets cut short because I can feel her hand gently turn my face to hers, our eyes meeting, and I can feel the coldness of her rings, oh shit I’m catching fucking feelings, she rubs my cheek with her thumb and smiles

“Kiss me.. I dare you.” She teases, she licks her lips and pulls her bottom lip between her teeth

My heart is beating fast and I smirk

“And if I don’t?” I ask, she leans in to me, our lips only centimeters apart

“Pussy.” She whispers jokingly, she presses her lips to mine and starts to kiss me softly

She’s so warm and soft, my heart melts and I’m on cloud 9, I’m way too soft for her

She pulls away, both of us a little breathless

She starts to smile which causes me to also smirk a bit

“Wow I guess I really can get it huh.” I say my breath still shaking a bit

“Oh my fucking god shut up, put your seatbelt on we are going on a fucking adventure.” She starts to laugh, she sits back in her seat and turns on the car.

My cheeks are burning and I can’t stop from smiling. She gets on the road and puts on music, she turns it up as loud as she can.

I get my phone from my back pocket and video her and I singing and acting like dumb asses and post it on my insta story and tagging her.... billie x y/n is going to be trending for awhile.

im sorry if this was bad 🥴 ew and I’m so slow lmao okay anyways 💞✨✨💞💞 😌oof and she’s(the story) also long tho

#billie eilish fics #billie #eilish #billie eilish #fic #cute #writing #imagine #im slow

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elcorhamletlive · 5 years

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fandom: MCU (Alternate Universe - High School) ship: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark tags: Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Tooth-rotting fluff, Pining

Dear Journal,

Jarvis told me a journal could help when I can’t use my phone in class and I get bored because I already know everything the teachers are saying. So now I’m in Math class and I’m super bored, so I decided to write to make it seem like I’m taking notes.

Ms. Karen is looking my way right now. Let’s see if she buys it.

She bought it. Great. This class is already starting late because she took time out of it to introduce the new student, so I guess she doesn’t has time to check if I’m actually copying the equations.

The new guy is kind of funny. His name is Steve and he’s really small. I kind of like him already because now I’m not the shortest guy in our year anymore.

Great, the bell rang. Ttyl.

Book of Tony

Tony’s Declassified School Survival Guide

Death Note

Dear J,

Yeah, that works for me. I like calling you J. Not my best nickname, but it will have to do.

Today I’m in History class, and it’s been a really fun class. The new guy, Steve, sits right in front of me.

And, like, he’s definitely a huge nerd. Not in the sense that he gets good grades, because I don’t know if he does, but he’s always paying attention to the teacher’s every word. And he never talks during class (I don’t think he’s made any friends yet).

But today he talked. Because Hodge was picking on Banner, and then Steve just stood up and went right in front of the table and told him to stop. Just like that.

Hodge laughed, of course. But it was still pretty cool.

Dear J,

Here’s a list of all the things more interesting than this class right now:

Dum-E’s beeps when he manages to hose something.

Mold forming under the teacher’s table.

All the Star Wars prequels.

Steve Rogers’ socks.

(They’re, like, actual wool socks that go all the way to half of his calf. It’s like he deliberately set out to dress as an uncool loser. They have a pattern of little cows. It’s amazing.)

Dear J,

I can’t believe I’m writing this, but History class was awesome.

Get this: Steve got into a fight with Mr. Jenkins about Columbus. Because Mr. Jenkins had just finished reading a passage from a book about him, and he asked if anyone had any questions, and Steve just raised his hand and Mr. Jenkins was like, “Sure, go ahead, Mr. Rogers” (the teachers like Steve because he’s so quiet) and Steve just said “Why doesn’t it say anything about all the rapes and violence he committed?”.

I don’t think Mr. Jenkins likes Steve very much now.

Still, it was the most interesting thing to ever happen in his class in years. He should be grateful.

Dear J,

I thought about talking to Steve after class, to let him know I thought it was cool, what he did.

I don’t really go to the cafeteria during lunch, because since Rhodey graduated I don’t really have a table to sit. Eating alone suckssss.

I thought I could sit with Steve, maybe? Because he’s new, so I thought, he probably doesn’t know anyone yet.

But it turns out he does know someone. He sat at the table of this big dude named Bucky Barnes.

I’m eating at the informatics club right now.

Dear J,

A probably incomplete list of Steve Rogers’ socks:

plain black socks (my least favorite)

the ones with the cows I mentioned before (he seems to like those, he wears them a lot).

red and blue stripped socks (sometimes just one foot paired with another one from the list, usually the plain pair. not sure if political commentary or not)

blue socks with little stars

blue socks with little R2-D2s (by far my favorite)

The last one makes me wonder if he’s into Star Wars. Maybe he just thinks R2-D2 is cool, though, which is also a valid opinion.

I kind of want to ask, but he’s always with that Barnes guy. It’s hard to get a moment to talk to him.

Dear J,

Talked to Steve today right after Math class. Ok, actually I kinda ran into him, but then we started talking? I complimented his socks and everything. At first he thought I was making fun of him, but then I showed him a picture of my star wars Lego set and he believed it. We talked so much Ms. Hill had to tell us to shut up and let her start the class.

He’s really funny, J. I didn’t know he was funny.

Dear J,

Steve invited me to have lunch with them today. Ngl I was a little nervous – didn’t wanna talk to Barnes – but I met his friends, Sam Wilson and this girl, Sharon Carter, and it was actually kind of fun.

It certainly beats eating in the informatics room.

Dear J,

Yesterday at lunch, Barton sat with us. I didn’t mind it (Barton is ok, I guess) until he decided to make a stupid comment about Barnes and Steve. It was so fucking stupid. Just because Barnes gave Steve his fries. Like, are you in fifth grade?

I could’ve given Steve my fries. I wasn’t gonna eat them anyway. But Barnes offered first. damnit

Dear J,

Today Steve asked me to help him with his math homework. I said yes, I’d love it.

(Why the fuck did I say that? Like, sure, I could’ve said yes, but why did I say I’d love it? That’s such a weird thing to say.

Steve just smiled. But I bet he thought it was weird.)

Now I’m in last period, ignoring Mr. Coulson and getting all nervous because I’m supposed to go to Steve’s house after school.

What if say something stupid? Worse, what if I start rambling and I say something shitty and he gets mad? And am I gonna be a good teacher anyway? I always go off when I talk about Math, sometimes I don’t understand what I’m saying. What if Steve sits there, looks at me with those blue eyes they’re so blue, holy shit and I end up, like, talking about the Hodge conjecture or something? That’s not really date talk.

And is that even a date? Would Steve even want to have a date with me?

Ok, class’s over. Gotta go, J. Wish me luck.

Dear J,

Yesterday was AWESOME.

We talked a lot. I even told him about the Hodge conjecture after all!! And Steve said it was amazing I know this. He sounded like he really meant it (he always sounds like he means everything he says. It’s something in the way he talks).

Steve thinks he’s bad at math, but he isn’t. He just has a harder time with numbers. He’s actually super smart. And he’s so fun to talk to, J. He’s just so...

I don’t know if it was a date. We didn’t kiss or anything. But I had a great time. I hope he asks for help again.

Dear J,

He asked again!! I’m supposed to help him with his chemistry homework on Saturday. Again not sure if this is a date, but it’s so awesome.

Today at lunch there was something a little different with us. Barnes was there, sure, but I could barely notice his presence, and I bet Steve didn’t either. We were talking about what might happen to Kylo Ren in the next movies. I’m pro-redemption, he’s against it. We talked so much we didn’t even notice when the bell rang.

Anthony Stark-Rogers

Anthony Rogers

Anthony Rogers-Stark

Dear J,

Can’t really focus on writing lately. I’ve been just scribbling stuff.

(Don’t give me this look. You’re a journal, you can’t judge me.)

Dear J,

It’s been almost a week since I last wrote here. Feels a bit weird to write down what went on, honestly, but I’m gonna try. I missed writing in you.

So. Apparently, last time I scribbled those stupid names (so fucking stupid), I was grinning like an idiot, and Hodge started teasing me, asking me what was up. Of course, I can’t keep my mouth shut, so I snapped back at him and he got angry and he and his friends cornered me on the way out and took you out of my backpack and, I mean, you were there. They started reading aloud, laughing the whole time.

Steve was in the bathroom, so he only got to it around the ending, but he definitely heard enough. I was so fucking embarrassed, I couldn’t even think, I just grabbed you and ran away.

Now Steve keeps calling me and I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to answer him because I don’t want to hear him rejecting me, and I don’t want to have to apologize for writing all that stupid shit about him because I didn’t think anyone would read it! I just thought I was being dumb in my journal, alone, like it’s my God-given right as a stupid teenager in love with someone.

Yeah, there, I said it. No point in pretending anymore, I guess, since the whole school has probably heard it by now. I’m in love, and Steve isn’t, and now everyone knows and I just want to stay in my room for the rest of my life.

Dear J,

Barnes called me. I answered almost out of surprise, to be honest– I didn’t even know he had my number. He didn’t bother telling me how he got it, he just straight up started saying I needed to answer Steve before he did anything dumber. And then I said “you mean, before he does anything dumb” (I don’t normally correct people, but I wanted to be an asshole with him), but he answered: “No, idiot, he already did something dumb”.

And then I found out Steve got suspended.

Because he punched Hodge in the face.

I kind of didn’t have anything to say to that, so Barnes was just like “yeah, I know” and told me the whole story. Apparently, a few days after the mess, Steve went to Hodge, because he wanted to get Hodge to apologize to me (he’s a fan of impossible causes) and of course Hodge told him to fuck off and I guess he said something about me (Barnes didn’t know what it was because Steve refused to repeat) and then Steve punched his face.

And that’s. I mean, that’s the most awesome thing I’ve ever heard, right? So I told that to Barnes, and he was all like: “Of course you think that. You two idiots were made for each other”.

So I guess I don’t hate Barnes anymore.

And I’m calling Steve tonight. Wish me luck.

Dear J,

I’m writing this now in Steve’s room. He went downstairs to see if the popcorn was ready, and I thought I’d update you a little.

When I called him, yesterday, at first he was super shocked I was actually talking to him. I asked how he was, and I told him about my talk with Barnes (guess I should start calling him Bucky now?). He said he was fine, which is Steve speak for “Hodge totally punched him back”, so I wanted to see him, and he told me come over.

And… I’m here now, so you can guess how it went. We didn’t fuck or anything – Steve told me he’s never done it before with anyone, and when we do it I want it to be special, so special he never wants to do it with anyone else. But we kissed, and we kissed a lot, and let me tell you, we’d totally still be kissing if we didn’t have to stop and do other meaningless things, like breathing and sleeping.

Steve says he didn’t kiss many people before me, but he’s such a great kisser, J. He’s just- he tastes so good and his mouth is so soft and just… Yeah. Awesome. 10/10, would do it again (will do it again as soon as he gets back with the popcorn).

We talked about you, too. He said he thinks it’s "super cute", that I write in you – and then he flushed and started saying he didn’t mean to be condescending, which was super cute too. He says he’s not good at writing many things, mostly he draws.

He showed me a few of his drawings. I’m in a few, and there’s one of both of us holding hands, which was how the kissing started.

Now I’m listening to his steps coming up the stairs, so I better go. I’m so happy, J. I didn’t even know I could get this happy.

Dear J,

The best things about dating Steve Rogers, in no particular order.

Getting to see his socks’ drawer and pick out my favorites for him to wear on our dates (the R2-D2 pair is still the winner, but he’s got one with little stars he only wears at home that I kind of love because I’m the only one who sees it).

Eating his mom’s cookies.

Joining his mom in her efforts to make him eat more (and the way he frowns and gets all grumpy about it).

Watching him shoot angry glares at Hodge any time he breathes in my direction (I considered telling Steve to relax, but, honestly, I kind of love it when he does that).

Cuddling with him in bed while he watches this youtube video I found that proves Kylo’s redemption is inevitable.

Kissing the little freckles behind his ears and watching as he blushes all over.

The smile he’s gonna give when I show him this list.

Gotta go, J. Ttyl.

P.S.: It’s totally gonna be “Stark-Rogers”.

#stony #superhusbands #stony fic #stevetony fic #happy steve bingo #my fics

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everyfandomeverywhereallatonce · 6 years

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Arrowverse Re-Watch: Arrow season 1, episode 4 “An Innocent Man”

***Disclaimer: I recommend you read the tags before digging in to this review.

So I’m doing my annual Arrowverse re-watch (where I go back and watch all the Arrowverse shows in chronological order) and this year, I decided I would make these reviews/commentaries about each episode as I re-watch them.

So here goes… WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD

LL: I care about the lives of other people, Oliver. Maybe you should try it sometime.

First of all...hitting it a little hard on the nose, don’t you think writers? We get it, she’s a saint, can we move on now?

Secondly, Oliver bb, why are you still carrying a torch for her? You already met wifey, you don’t need this negativity in your life.

But in all seriousness

Does anyone else think it’s interesting that when Oliver needed tech help he went to Felicity as himself and when he went to LL for legal help, he could only go as the Hood?

I mean, come on people! How much more proof do you need that Oliver and LL just aren’t right for each other? He can’t even be completely himself with her! And don’t give me any of this “he’s protecting her” bullshit because when push came to shove, Oliver didn’t have any problem telling Felicity his secret.

I just love that Felicity is so confident in her technical abilities and that she’s so unapologetic about her intelligence. When she thought she was being fired, it wasn’t because she didn’t think she was good enough at her job.

I miss the days when Felicity was the smarted person on the show and she wasn’t dumbed down to make other characters *coughC*rtiscough* look better.

I’m sure that Felicity will be back to being herself again now that Beth is in charge and MG doesn’t have his grubby, misogynistic hands all over her anymore.

LL: I think they need someone who cares about the lives of other people. Someone like you.

For fuck’s sake, the writers really don’t know the definition of subtlety do they?

Ugh who wrote this episode?

Oh okay, it was written by two writers who wrote a couple other sappy L*uriver episodes.

I just feel like, episodes like these that really shove L*uriver down your throat are all great examples of why L*uriver just doesn’t work.

Oliver: I took your advice with L*urel to be myself.

Thea: And?

Oliver: It’s helping.

Thea: I got mad relationship skills bro. Let me know if you need trendy places to propose.

First of all, Thea, that’s the wrong ship you’re boarding. You’re actually looking for the Olicity ship. But it’s okay Thea, bb, I forgive you. You weren’t the only one that mistakenly boarded the L*uriver ship before realizing that it was awful and doomed to sink.

Secondly, Oliver wasn’t himself with LL, he was the Hood. And considering how desperate Oliver is to claim that the two are totally separate, you’d think he’d realize that. If you can’t even tell her your secret, then how could you possibly think a relationship between you two would work? (And for the record, Oliver never actually told LL his secret, it was Slade. I have no doubts that Oliver was never going to tell her himself.)

Oliver: Rob. You gotta keep up.

I miss cheeky Oliver! I would ask if we could bring cheeky Oliver back in season 7, but considering that he’s spending the whole hiatus in prison, I doubt we’ll ever see cheeky Oliver again. Or maybe we will...after all, Oliver will have plenty of things to smile about in season 7.

(If you don’t know what I’m talking about btw, I’m talking about the Olicity baby. David [Ramsey] confirmed that it’s gonna happen in season 7 and David never lies to us.)

Felicity: The company Mrs. Queen...Steele...Mrs. Queen-Steele? Does she hyphenate? She seems like a woman who would hyphenate.

Oh Felicity, bb, you’re so smart and I love you, but obviously she’s not “a woman who would hyphenate”. If she was, then she would be known as Moira Dearden-Queen and not Moira Queen.

In the last episode, LL could more than hold her own in a fight. Now, during this prison riot, she’s once again helpless and needs Oliver to save her.

So is LL Bl*ck C*nary or Princess Peach? Because the writers can’t seem to be able to make up their minds.

As frustrating as it is seeing Oliver waste his time pining after LL, I have to say that him almost killing an inmate for choking her isn’t entirely out of character for him.

Oh well, I just have to grit my teeth and muddle through until Oliver realizes that he can do better than LL and he stops giving her the time of day.

This moment where Oliver kills the pheasant is such a great moment and so beautifully acted by Stephen. The way he apologizes to the pheasant and how he can’t even look at it as he snaps its neck. Ugh this moment gets me every single time.

Season 1: We have solid evidence that Oliver Queen is the Hood! But wait, it’s not him after all.

Season 3: We have solid evidence that Oliver Queen is the Arrow! But wait, it’s actually Roy Harper.

Season 6: We have solid evidence that Oliver Queen is the Green Arrow! But wait, it’s actually Tommy Merlyn! Scratch that, it is Oliver Queen.

Honestly do the people of Star City even care anymore? If I lived in Star City, at this point I’d be like, jfc who fucking cares who he is can you just let him keep protecting the city?

You know how on Black Lightning, they’ll show the news interviewing random citizens of Freeland about the events going on? We need that on Arrow. I’d actually be pretty interested to hear from the regular citizens of Star City (especially the ones who actually voted for Oliver to be Mayor) on what they think about all the stuff going on.

Oh my god guys. I think I finally understand why John went so batshit crazy in season six. In this episode when John joins the team, he makes a speech about how Oliver needs someone to save him and remind him of who he is.

Well, in season 6, Oliver is finally evolved. He’s opened himself up to love by becoming a husband and a father, he’s become a true hero and a good leader. He’s mature which means John’s job of saving Oliver’s soul is complete. So John has a bit of a mid-life crisis because he feels he no longer has a purpose in life.

(This is me trying to apply logic to a completely illogical and nonsensical plot-over-characterization plot.)

Oh dear me! Oliver’s been arrested! What ever shall we do?

Well this has been fun. Next up: episode 5 (just in case you lack basic arithmetic skills)

#arrow #arrow season 1 #arrow 1x04 #anti laurel lance #oliver queen #anti lauriver #felicity smoak #olicity #thea queen

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jwminssi · 6 years

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Jikook Fic Rec

I spend a lot of time reading fanfics (really, a lot) and I just figured I should gather all my favorite stories in one place for when I want to read them again. This is not as big as it should be seeing as I lost my previous list and had to start all over again *insert sad face here* but I will try my best to update it regularly!

bold: ultimate favorites!

updated: Jun, 23rd, 2018

❈ Glass Diamonds by GinForInk [e / 18.5k] ~ Summary: Jungkook accidentally fires his skateboard through the window of a dance studio. ~ Commentary: this one is definitely one of my all time favorites! Everything about it from the writing style to the characterization to the plot had me begging for more. I’ll have to read it again soon!

❈ Present by pinkmonnie [m / 21k] ~ Summary: “Sometimes I wish I could fall through this wall instead. Spend a few days with just you and the beach and no other distractions. I'd love some quiet in my life.” One night, unable to take the solitude, Jimin writes a single word on the wall of the abandoned record store. He never expected to get a reply, least of all from a kind stranger all the way back in the real world. One afternoon, as he's working on the repairs of the record store, Jungkook finds someone had written something on one of the walls. And he writes back. ~ Commentary: There are NO WORDS to describe my love for this fic. Seriously, everything is perfect and the plot unravels so beautifully and it’s wonderfully written, I can’t say enough compliments. If you have the time, please read it!

❈ Don’t Think, Don’t Speak, Just Smile For Me by Ragi [not rated / 145k] ~ Summary: Jimin's not entirely certain that he'll be alive to see his 18th birthday and finally escape from his father's abuse, but Jungkook's music keeps him believing that he might actually make it. ~ Commentary: I couldn’t stop crying while reading this and I still loved every second of it. Mind the tags and the warnings, though!

❈ why don’t you review me? by cedar_rabbits [e / 7k] ~ Summary: Jimin reviews sex toys on Youtube. Jeongguk has a crush. ~ Commentary: oh, boy, this one! Jungkook’s the cutest baby with a crush and their dynamics are amazing. (Also, Taehyung is a true treasure in this!!!)

❈ All Of This Seems Like A Dream by njhft_mgc [e / 5.6k] ~ Summary: two dumb and oblivious boys, some couch fun, and awkward mornings. ~ Commentary: I am a HUGE bottom!kook enthusiast and this fic not only has that but it also manages to capture JK’s early days persona into it really well.

❈ International playboy (don't answer) by blt_prf [not rated / 39k, not finished] ~ Summary: the one in which Jimin manages to mess up everything in one night and accidentally texts the guy he has a crush on ~ Commentary: I usually stay away from unfinished stories but this one was out for my heart from the moment I started reading it. It’s got to be the most believable and well characterized texting fic I have ever read, I highly recommend it!

❈ Can You Give Me My Breath Back by DeadpanSnarker [m / 27k] ~ Summary: Six months until the tournament that would decide Jungkook's future. Six months where he and his team were in dire need to monopolize the ice-rink that had taken a liking to Uni’s new sweetheart. Where Jimin made a bet with Jungkook, which, if Jungkook lost, he would have to be taught how to ‘truly’ skate. Or as how Jimin had phrased it, ‘By the time I'm done with you, you’ll have fallen in love with figure-skating’. Surely things didn’t work out in Jungkook's favour. In their fickle game, Jungkook is in for sex and Jimin is in for love. By the end of the six months, perhaps Jungkook would like figure-skating, but he would have adamantly fallen in love with the figure-skater. ~ Commentary: EVERYTHING. ABOUT. THIS. FIC. IS. WORTH IT. Jimin’s characterization is everything we all want in life and I love it way too much to be healthy. It’s really nice to see the way their relationship develops and I couldn’t stop reading it.

❈ peaches and cream by jiminlogy [m / 2.4k] ~ Summary: the story of how booty shorts ruined jeongguk's life. ~ Commentary: I had the time of my life reading this one. Jungkook’s struggle is the most amusing thing to read and it’s really well done in this, too!

❈ swim by jiminlogy [m / 12k] ~ Summary: everything about the summer is temporary but jimin doesn't want jeongguk to be that. ~ Commentary: YES!! GIVE ME ALL THE BODYGUARD AU FICS! The atmosphere in this fic is so captivating it took my breath away. The way their relationship develops is so beautifully done and the dialogue in this is also really great.

❈ Practice by nochucomethru [t / 5k] ~ Summary: Jungkook is fed up with being inexperienced. Jimin helps him out. ~ Commentary: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this was so good !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel like there isn’t enough just making out fics out there and I’m always looking for more. This one was definitely a great find!

❈ pull me closer by pjungkook [not rated / 2.6k] ~ Summary: Jeon Jungkook is rather competitive. But so is Park Jimin. ~ Commentary: nothing I say will be enough to explain just how much of a masterpiece this is! Their dynamic is so well written and the tension is so thick you could cut it with a knife. It put me on edge as I was reading it and I loved it!

❈ Hey Kitty, Kitty by jonghyunslisterine [e / 3.4k] ~ Summary: Jungkook and Jimin have been dancing around each other for ages, then Jimin goes into heat. ~ Commentary: I’m usually not a fan of Hybrid!AUs but something told me to read this one when I stumbled upon it one day and MY GOD am I glad I didn’t ignore it! The smut is unbelievable and I’m always down for some boxer!JK, thank you very much.

❈ got that young love (even when we're old) by offthebeat [m / 12k] ~ Summary: a three-day trip back to busan shouldn't incite these strange feelings in jeongguk again. but, well, busan is almost always equivalent to jimin, and jeongguk's never been the greatest at dealing with either. post-disbandment!au. ~ Commentary: oh this was so heartwrenching and heartwarming at the same time, the way the story was set and the turns of the plot, plus their internal dilemmas and unresolved feelings just gave this a wonderful atmosphere.

❈ Nu ABO: A Memoir by Park Jimin by decompositionbooks [e / 34.5k] ~ Summary: The world didn't think it was necessary to give him a guide when it shoved all of these omega hormones at him, so here it is, Park Jimin's handbook on dealing with heats, unrequited love, and Jeon Jungkook. ~ Commentary: I’m sure everyone already knows or at least heard of this one but I just had to put it on this list because it wouldn’t be complete without it. I can’t express my love for this fic with words, so I just suggest you go ahead and read it if you haven’t already (and if you have, well, read it again).

❈ joke's on you (i'm in love) by NaHe [t / 2.5k] ~ Summary: Jimin plays a prank on Jungkook for his YouTube channel, expecting him to get angry but Jungkook has always had a soft spot for his hyung. Things don't go as planned. ~ Commentary: FLUFF!!!!!! PURE FLUFF I LOVE IT SO MUCH THAT’S ALL

❈ Wish You Were Here by nochucomethru [m / 28.5k] ~ Summary: Jungkook clicked on his picture. And wow. Taehyung was right for once. The dude was gorgeous. His name was Jimin. He was Korean, like them and he had a really pretty smile. Pretty enough that Jungkook actually felt nervous. “He’s really cute. What do I say?” Jungkook asked. ~ Commentary: Listen. Everything about this is perfect, don’t fight me on this. I spent pretty much the entire time I was reading it squealing about how they acted with each other. If you read it, please come scream with me about it.

❈ And Back Again by novilunar [m / 3k] ~ Summary: Jimin wishes he could stay away from Jungkook ~ Commentary: it was extremely easy for me to identify with Jimin in this and I love it when I can find a fic that makes me feel as much as this one did. Not to mention that the way it was written was just fantastic!

❈ Tastes Like Victory by eumorious [e / 170.5k] ~ Summary: "You fuck me, then snub me. You love me, you hate me. You show me a sensitive side, then you turn into a total asshole." Jeon Jeongguk's, a successful underground fighter, life collides with the damaged, vulnerable stripper Park Jimin who needs training on how to fight and defend himself against his clients. Jeongguk is the perfect candidate for the job. ~ Commentary: okay, so this one... I’ve seen a lot of controversy on it before and after I read it but I can’t help but consider it one of my favorites. Granted, I couldn’t read it all at once like the majority of the stories on this list because of how intense and heavy it is, but I still love it a lot. Taehyung and Jungkook’s friendship is so so so beautiful it’s got to be one of my favorite things about it. It’s amazing to see Jungkook evolve and open up and literally transform in front of our eyes, 10/10 for character development. I highly recommend it, but please pay attention to the tags and warnings.

❈ As You Are by jonghyunslisterine [e / 19k] ~ Summary: Jungkook's looking for a model for his Shibari exhibition. Jimin just needs some money. ~ Commentary: there’s a certain feeling to this story that I can’t pinpoint but it left me so immersed in it it was hard to let go when it ended. The characterization it amazing and the use of shibari is perfectly done, it doesn’t feel like just another plot device.

❈ What You Need by jonghyunslisterine [e / 8.1k] ~ Summary: Jimin's heat hits him early, and it's because Jungkook gets into a fight. ~ Commentary: I know, I know... this author again? It’s not my fault their stories are so amazing, okay, let me be... This is pure smut but it’s amazing and definitely worth your time, I promise.

❈ No Strings Attached by graesun [e / 23.3k] ~ Summary: Jungkook likes his job, but sometimes he wishes he had someone to do it for him. ~ Commentary: as I mentioned before, I’m all for bottom!kook especially when he’s a shy bunny just like in this fic. Oh, and if that’s not enough to convince you, he’s also a camboy, I mean... how many camboy!jk fics are out there? This one is truly a treasure.

❈ Sweeter Than Your Coffee by TsingaDark [g / 3.5k] ~ Summary: Jungkook had a problem. Okay, maybe it was three consecutive problems that all originated from the same thing. Or well, the same person, to be perfectly honest. Problem No. 1 Jungkook had a massive, massive crush on Park Jimin. ~ Commentary: CUTE CUTE CUTE CUTE CUTE I couldn’t even wait for class to finish to read this, that’s how adorable and great it was.

❈ BTS: Beyond That Screen by jeonify [g / 5.3k] ~ Summary: "i saw you making a face drinking the coffee i made... again... so here's a little something in case i screwed up your coffee. again." + "i liked a picture of my crush in 2014 while trying to stalk him on instagram. shit." alternatively: your ultimate coffeeshop au meets youtuber au ~ Commentary: this has got to be one of the most adorable things I have read in weeks!!!! Again, I was in class while I read it and I had to stop myself from grinning too hard or making any type of noises because it was just SO!!!! CUTE!!!!! I LOVE IT

❈ your body is a place to stay by jonghyunslisterine [t / 8.8k] ~ Summary: In which Jungkook juggles a five-year-old daughter, Jimin the pretty bookstore employee, and coworkers who like to tease him too much. ~ Commentary: by now you’re all convinced that I love this author, right? This is another work of art, beautiful written and completely captivating. Jungkook’s relationship with his daughter made my heart warm and the way Jimin surprises Jungkook by being the opposite of everyone else made me cry.

❈ Mono No Aware by eumorious [e / 105k] ~ Summary: Jimin and Jeongguk were only 18 when they moved to New York City and got married, sure that they were soulmates and destined to last forever. Four unfortunate years later, they're divorced and haven't seen a single sight of each other. That is until Jimin's signed as a model in the company Jeongguk works as a photographer for. ~ Commentary: this one is so heartbreaking, my chest hurt at every paragraph! There’s something so painful about the way this author writes but it only leaves me wanting more. I loved every second of it, but please be careful with the tags and warnings.

❈ loverboy by gangbang [m / 9.7k] ~ Summary: this much jimin’s figured out: sometimes, somehow, his words make people fall in love with him. ~ Commentary: The writing in this is absolutely fantastic and the emotions designated to each of the characters fits perfectly with them. Their dynamics is also really well thought and well written and I love the general atmosphere of the story.

❈ more golden than a golden snitch by aborescent [g / 4.5k] ~ Summary: Everyone knows that the first year Slytherin seeker Jeon Jungkook's biggest fan is not from his own house but a third year Hufflepuff named Park Jimin. ~ Commentary: CUTE CUTE CUTE PLEASE DO YOURSELF A FAVOR AND READ THE ENTIRE SERIES I’M NOT EVEN GOING TO WASTE MORE TIME HERE JUST GO READ IT PLEASE

❈ Surviving Jeon Jungkook by weliveandbreathwords [t / 20.5k] ~ Summary: The time that Jimin had to sit next to the notorious Jeon Jungkook and had to do all he could to come out alive. ~ Commentary: bad boy!Jungkook being completely taken with Jimin has got to be one of my favorite tropes EVER! It’s amazing how their relationship progresses (the doodlessss my heart!!!) and how we get to see both sides of the story too! Seriously, give this one a chance!!

❈ promise rings by cocksluts [e / 21.8k] ~ Summary: cliche friends with benefits problems with slight twists of some sort ~ Commentary: I LOVE IT WHEN THEY’RE IN LOVE BUT CAN’T BE TOGETHER GOD DAMN IT sorry but I just- the way Jimin handles the situation and how Jungkook’s the one that spills his heart out yes please give me four thousand fics like this!!!!!!!!

❈ Taste You by beautifulmoment [e / 2.8k] ~ Summary: The band has a photoshoot to do and Jimin’s been brooding all day until Jungkook finds out why. Or, Jimin and admittedly Jungkook really want to try out something new. ~ Commentary: OH BOI THIS ONE listen- I don’t even know what to say, okay, it’s just great and I really enjoyed it!!!!!!!!!!!!

❈ Cheat by Nochucomethru [t / 2.7k] ~ Summary: When he got inside he was greeted with the sound of a beautiful laugh that he didn’t recognize. Despite being Sungjin’s babysitter for three years, Jungkook had never met Jimin. He heard stories about him so many times from his younger brother, but he was just now realizing that he didn’t even know what the man looked like. ~ Commentary: so here’s yet another author that has a lot of places in this list, oops? Their dynamics in this is AMAZING, and the way they behave around each other works super well despite having just met. Wonderfully written, and Jimin’s mom is great.

❈ and a circus ain't a love story (now we're both sorry) by sweetmxchi [m / 4k] ~ Summary: in his desire to escape, jungkook ends up finding something that will keep him grounded. ~ Commentary: um yes, hi, here’s some shameless self promo lol the reason I included this fic is because I’ve been going through some changes in my life and it’s reflecting in what I write... this is different from most of the stuff I’ve written and while I am super proud of myself for finishing it (it took me weeks to get it done) I’m also a bit insecure. so yeah, if you feel like it, let me know what you think?

❈ reassurance by blushguk [t / 1k] ~ Summary: in which taehyung and jimin are a little too close for jungkook's liking ~ Commentary: I cried reading this, that is all. This is not your typical jealous!jk fic and I loved it for it!

❈ It’s always been you by calicojikook [m / 11k] ~ Summary: Jungkook and Jimin have a history together. Years later, Jungkook works in a body mod. shop with Yoongi and gets an unexpected customer. ~ Commentary: I’m always a sucker for tattoo artist!Jungkook and this one is so so so well done, I had my heart in my hands while I was reading it. A bit painful, but it’s all worth it in the end.

❈ Nanny by Nochucomethru [m / 13.1k] ~ Summary: “I can’t believe I’m actually considering being a nanny. What did I do wrong in my life?” Jungkook sighed, leaning back in his chair. “Probably the entire sleeve tattoo that you couldn’t afford,” Taehyung said. ~ Commentary: I think it’s time we establish that this is one of my favorite authors and literally everything they write is perfect. JK is so soft in this and I love the way the author portrayed his relationship with Jimin’s daughter. I loved every. word. of. it. READ IT!!!!

❈ To the naked eye by mecchayabai [e / 6k] ~ Summary: It’s one of those meaningless, mandatory classes, and Jungkook is fully prepare to spend it doodling dicks into his notebook. But when Jungkook sees the TA, the only thing he wants to do with a dick is stick it into him. ~ Commentary: YES YES YES!!!! The tension between them is great, and I love Jungkook’s characterization in this!!!

❈ nudity in its best form by yoonnseok [m / 11.6k / unfinished] ~ Summary: Best friends since elementary school, Jeongguk and Jimin agreed to help their photography major friend Taehyung with his new project. But Taehyung forgot (not really) to mention the theme. Which was, nudity. ~ Commentary: this is so beautiful! I have no words to describe how well written this is, and I was so immersed in it from the first paragraph! Although it’s not finished, I still love it a lot!

❈ #jikook by TsingaDark [t / 11k] ~ Summary: Jimin has a crush on Jungkook and finally meets him when he accompanies Taehyung to a gaming convention. ~ Commentary: this is so cutejkndlsjkndns their characterization is A M A Z I N G and I was smiling all throughout the fic, really!! lots of love to it <3

❈ just stay by hellodarknessmyoldbud [g / 3.8k] ~ Summary: “Hyung, you don't love me.” the youngest whimpers as tears keep streaming down his cheeks. “You love each other.” ~ Commentary: okay, firstly: this is yoonminkook so not everyone is going to read it, I know... but it’s so sad and heartbreaking and GOD it made me feel so many things, I HAD to put it in here!!

❈ yesteryear’s charms by flitter [m / 18.3k] ~ Summary: After losing a bet, Jimin has to perform the Jingle Bell Rock routine from the iconic Muggle film, Mean Girls, at Hogwarts' annual talent show, dressed in red pleather and black knee-high boots. He receives a bigger reaction from certain people (read: ult rival Jeon Jeongguk) than expected. ~ Commentary: LISTEN!!!!!!!!! All HP AUs are welcome and loved in this household, especially Slytherin!Jimin ones, okay?? This fic, mannnnnn, I actually can’t tell you how much I love it, you just have to read it and see for yourself.

❈ Shy, Curious by onlyalivetonight [e / 17.2k] ~ Summary: Jungkook goes to a 'Shy, Curious' night for a BDSM club, because he is shy and definitely curious. He meets Jimin and Yoongi, who might just want him as much as he wants them. ~ Commentary: I SWEAR I didn’t mean to put another yoonminkook in here but this one just pulls at my heart strings in all the best ways :(( their characterization and dynamics as couples and a trio are so so so perfectly written, I just wanted more! it’s soft and hard at the same time and I loved every moment I spent reading it!

❈ We Can Smile by njhft_mgc [m / 3.2k] ~ Summary: rich CEO boyfie jimin buys jungkook lots and lots of pretty stuff ok ~ Commentary: I’m always a sucker for sugar daddy AUs and whipped!Jimin so OF COURSE this gem had to be included, it’s so good :(((

❈ Love Exhibition by busanmonarchy [m / 2k] ~ Summary: P.D.A. (Public Displays of Affection): – acts of physical intimacy in the view of others. Or: Jimin and Jungkook are in love and not trying to hide it. ~ Commentary: this one :( it’s so beautiful, the way it’s written really highlights the nature of their relationship and makes us feel how in love they are and it just warms my heart and makes me sad at the same time

❈ Hey batter batter, hey batter batter, swing! by lovevminkook [g / 2.4k] ~ Summary: Jimin gets his boyfriend to teach him about baseball. Jungkook might regret it later on. ~ Commentary: this is HILARIOUS plus the high school musical reference really does it for me ejhsdjn read it, seriously, I love it a lot!

❈ fetish for my love by meatykook [e / 4k] ~ Summary: Jimin found Jungkook's lace shirt so distracting that he decided to tell the whole world that. Jungkook is going to show him how really distracting it can be. ~ Commentary: okay so I remember when Jimin said that and I was like djshnjn EXCUSE ME and T H E N I found this fic and OH MY GOD please read you’re in for a RIDE

❈ Itchy Fingers by peanutbutterapple [g / 6.3k] ~ Summary: Jungkook is on the hip hop team. Jimin does Irish dance. ~ Commentary: um so this is the cutest thing?? their characterization is AMAZING and everything flows really well and I love it

❈ If Only You Knew by pancakejungkook [t / 3.7k] ~ Summary: Jimin was just tying to be a good friend, he only wanted to help. However, when he opened Jungkook's laptop, he got so much more than he bargained for. ((Based off the prompt: You've been typing furiously on your laptop in the library, and have just gone to get a book, so I had a quick look and you're writing hardcore gay porn and it's GOOD.)) ~ Commentary: LISTEN FJNSDKLN JUST THE PROMPT IS ALREADY ICONIC THE REST OF THE STORY IS EVEN BETTER I’M DYING JUST THINKING ABOUT IT

❈ i'm getting way too deep (i'm into it) by jhsmyg [e / 7.3k] ~ Summary: jikook meets on grindr. jimin said he wanted to fuck him later. jungkook was into it. ~ Commentary: there are no comments?? for this??? nothing I can say can make it better or even compare to how amazing this is so just go read it pls

❈ Getting to Know You by mn_bts [e / 5.4] ~ Summary: Jungkook is just another overwhelmed college student. His hot neighbor, Jimin, has an interesting problem with a bold silver lining. ~ Commentary: Jimin playing innocent to get what he wants will always be my weak spot plus this fic is so HOT I can’t even put it into words (also I just reread this while updating the list so...........)

❈ me and you, living under a paper moon by eutony [t / 6k] ~ Summary: wherein jimin’s a barista who hates rude customers, and jeongguk’s just a guy who wants to order a latte without making a complete fool of himself. or: the “you’re the jerk-face customer that keeps on thumbing through their phone while ordering their drink so I exact revenge by spelling your name wrong on your cup and drawing phallic pictures on your coffee” AU. ~ Commentary: this is adorableeeee and funny too edsnjn Jimin’s characterization is AMAZING and the way Kook just rolls with it yes thank you for this gem

❈ i guess i want too much by jonghyunslisterine [e / 16.5k] ~ Summary: "So, uh, how do you guys know each other?" "We're brothers," Jungkook says, and Jimin chokes on his own spit. Great. He fucked a pair of brothers. ~ Commentary: so I love when Jimin is written the way he was in this fic, that’s already a huge thing I appreciate in this fic BUT it is yoonminkook (admittedly not the only one in this list oops?) so idk if you guys like that... either way, this author is one of my faves as you can see from the number of works they have in this rec and the way they write is AMAZING plus the story is FANTASTIC and the smut is INCREDIBLE not to mention how well the story goes together and their dynamics too.

❈ The Chili Pepper Incident by thisneedsmorefilth [e / 7.5k] ~ Summary: Jungkook always thought Jimin was well...tiny. Short, little hands, small feet, small....everything. But add in a broken laptop charger and a maknae who doesn’t bother knocking and the truth will set you free. And get you laid. ~ Commentary: immediate fave just for Jimin’s characterization. jikook’s dynamics are A+ and the way Kook slowly loses his mind when things don’t go the way he expected is also amazing lmao

❈ in bloom by fatal (cumrich) [t / 2.5k] ~ Summary: jimin still hasn't wrapped his head around the fact that he has a husband but that doesn't mean he can't appreciate the sight of him. ~ Commentary: okay so the fact is that I don’t usually read ABO fics but this one, man....... it called for me you know? and when I read it it just got my heart in a way that I can’t even comprehend. so here, enjoy it, it’s WONDERFUL.

❈ Emotional Colors by WorldwideWriter [nr / 14.2k] ~ Summary: An AU in which your hair color changes based on the emotions that you're experiencing. or Jimin has been way too obvious about his feelings lately and Jungkook is a hormonal young man who should know that taking off his shirt in front of Jimin is a bad idea. ~ Commentary: LOVE THIS CONCEPT LOVE THE WRITING LOVE THE CHARACTERIZATION LOVE THE SMUT PERFECT YES

❈ I Get Off On You (And You) by HereIGoAgain [e / 15k] ~ Summary: "You trying to fuck him?" Jimin smiled and looked over at Jungkook. He was pleased to see that Jungkook was watching them, even as he shifted and moved with the music. "Or you," Jimin said, and enjoyed the definitive dark flicker that passed through Yoongi's eyes, felt himself internally preen at the fact that it was directed at him. "Whoever you think can fuck me the best." ~ Commentary: so um...... yes, it’s another yoonminkook fic SUE ME but just.... everything about this, the way they interact, the way they were written, the teasing, the dialogue and the smut let me tell you, this smut???????? FUCKING PERFECT there are no other ways I can compliment this fic but it’s SO SO SO WORTH THE READ

❈ Scribbles and Drawings by evil_pandabear [g / 2.3k] ~ Summary: Jimin would draw for his soulmate whenever he could, and in return he got adorable scribbles of random notes. Jungkook was forgetful and would write everything down on his hand, and got to watch the beautiful drawings form on his arm. ~ Commentary: cute cute cute cuTE CUTE CUTE CUTE CUTEEEEEEEE put a huge smile on my face

#jikook fic rec #jikook #kookmin #jikook fic #jikook au #this took way too long #but here it is #i'll update it regularly #well #i'll try

1K notes · View notes

vertigoambrosia · 6 years

Text

so apparently bobby gunns does some commentary or something on the german version cause tas tweeted a ‘whatever he says is not wxw’s views!!!’ tweet

but tough luck i’m not smart enough for german so there’ll be none of that in my shotgun blabbling

so today i guess we’re gonna see the beginning of the shotgun tournament, since the preview pic is of the 4 people who actually might get a title shot

tbh it’s kinda weird that those are first round matches - i mean, we all know juvenile x isn’t gonna have a title match at a big event...

i still think lucky and ivan will be the finals but i’m bad at predicting things so watch they’ll both lose today

the placement of dragan in the opening is really great btw

oh it’s these lil shits

god it was less than a month ago they were such nice boys

*francis voice* these vintage belts

well HELLO pete

committed to never wearing a shirt again

der cool kids

*ivan voice* i mean we’ve done some shit but we didn’t literally rob people

i bet ivan has always wanted to beat up a cool kid

oh boy dragan intervention time? can i not

‘i am julian pace. i relate to lightning mcqueen but i am not a car’

god lucky is ADORABLE

lmao tarkan so wants lucky to look serious and fearsome here and he just...can’t

bless our boy

have i ever mentioned that i’m an immature dumb american who giggles whenever i hear ‘fahrt’ in german words?

abfahrt

reminds me of a harvey birdman joke i won’t bother trying to type; maybe i’ll find it on youtube

AWWW ivan and pete are here for lucky too!

tarkan is in no mood for the finger thing

*lucky kid voice* if u r a car can i drive u?????

lucky totally got distracted by julian moving Very Fast

OMG HE IS PRETENDING TO DRIVE LUCKY THAT IS SO DUMB BUT ALSO AMAZING

oh it looks like ivan and pete didn’t stay at ringside...maybe they should to keep an eye on tarkan?

loll that chp and the sell

i mean it looks p stiff but he’s selling it like lucky’s walter

man i want both these guys to move on :(

wait i didnt exactly see what happened with the ring bell - tarkan slid it into the ring and the ref pushed it out and then??

i hope mella and lufisto become friends

see they’re bonding!

oh this is gonna be fun!!!

i love that shotgun shows wrestlers being silly with twitter

i mean, nothing’s quite like walter’s ‘omg i wish i could block every picture of bad bones with the tag title’ and tim warning us to stay away from the twitter

but lucky being gleeful over getting twitter attention and lufisto laughing at responses to her beating kelly are great too

oh ivan you’re my favorite weird looking rodent snake boy

(we should note that ivan did win the shotgun title clean - david starr did get distracted by bones, but flip was the one who went for the rollup and failed before ivan won)

sorry i didn’t pay attention to marius’ promo imagine i said something pithy about naruto or something

hayyy peeeeete

it must be really hard to be a weird looking dude with a really really ridiculously good looking best friend

or, alternatively i guess, it must own to date up

ivan’s such a weird longboy but it’s somehow like....sexually fascinating?

looks like a pervert, but a pervert you might fuck

...is alan saying ‘nip-up’? because...he shouldn’t

yes, he’s definitely saying nip up and i don’t know why

shoutouts to the rise signs, esp the one with the hearts

also shoutouts to @antifunpolice for the photo of pete and ivan smooching dragan because i’m pretty sure it could be photoshopped so it’s pete and ivan kissing

hell if i printed it out i could just fold it like one of those mad magazine inserts

ugh these lil shitbirds

the distraction didn’t really come across well on video though

BOOO DON’T BEAT UP MY BOYS

lol these boys are gonna die in five minutes once monster consulting get in the ring with them

ivan i’m sorry i jinxed it by saying you and lucky would make the finals

i think i remember hiding in the laundry room once in college when i was very sad so i relate to dragan’s choice of hiding place

seb is a good friend who says stupid things

i love him but like this is mr. ‘make a pros and cons list about your girlfriend’

just listen, sebastian...don’t speak

so the big wxw heels right now are young punks and whiny middle aged men

awww i can’t understand what they’re chanting

yeah i have that same shirt andy it’s not actually that special

UM I AM VERY LITERATE I READ SUBTITLES

loll andy pls i’m sure you ‘let’ ilja murder his way to the top

WOAH andy going a lil far there

*andy voice* i bet he hasn’t even named his penis!

boo these bad men!

and whoever keeps chanting for andy!

really everyone who chants for andy should be punished

idk have them take a walter chop or something

no don’t chant for aj

ohh yeah you fuckers al run from walter

don’t be a dick walter

pls

a good boy

totally hype for this match and this teamup!

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ariyadaivaris · 7 years

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HEY here's smth i've been thinking about lately: who on 205 Live would u like to see turn face and how would u like to see them do it? i been thinking about this and it's hard because the heel boys are all so close to each other and i don't wanna see em split up...

now–okay. 1) im sorry i took forever to read this im very shy and 2) im gonna be THEEEEEEeeEEEEEEeeeeEEEeeE most biased person on earth about this but this is SUCH A COOL QUESTION and i’m living for it, thank you cat for my life

and like. i mean the answer that’s easiest is OBVIOUSLY ariya. i mean. like. let’s be real here, especially if i’m the one answering, like, who else could it be, but ariya? he’s never had a face run in his career, iirc, and i want to see it, with my eyes, and live it forever.

and YEAH splitting up those sweet terrible heel boys is a bad time, and that’s something that always gets me when i’m thinking about turns, because ideally everyone remains friends, face or heel, but like…i think that with ariya that’s something that could be accomplished WHILE the rest of the heel boys stay heels. and i know this is a topic i am on about a lot, or at least it feels like it, but i think it would work if you had ariya turn face against brian, specifically.

jack’s not involved in this yet, i know that’s like, HI HELLO IT’S ME BUZZ INTERNET, but this turn doesn’t have anything to do with jack. okay it might have a BIT to do with jack but that’s not the most important part of it. it’s a subplot and not like, the main conflict driving this turn. the main conflict driving this turn is VERY much between ariya and brian, and there are a few points of interest here:

brian betraying tony in the contendership elimination match, which is a relatively small insignificant betrayal, but still a betrayal of one of ariya’s friends

brian outright allying himself with enzo and ariya, but not to convince enzo to leave wwe entirely (which, until proven otherwise, has to be ariya’s goal here because jesus christ) and instead either for manipulation reasons or because he sincerely relates to everyone being jealous of the cruiserweight champion. because he’s brian kendrick

brian not only fucking with jack but fucking with him to the point jack is ALLYING with him; ariya might be a bastard but he’s really loyal to the allies and friends he has, even noam, who ariya was never EXACTLY FOND OF but to whom ariya’s remained loyal and is pretty straightforward with

and just like…ariya’s a brutal guy and he takes pleasure in fighting people in the ring, and he’s pragmatic and not afraid to bend the rules to win, but as a person, he’s fundamentally…pretty genuine? genuine isn’t the right word, but. he’s blunt and what you see is what you get with him for the most part. he’s sneaky and tricky, but he’s also a pretty bad liar beyond playing a wounded gazelle gambit in the ring! like, his alliance with enzo? he’s of course a very sweet boy but he’s got a reputation as well and he’s very VERY much just…pretending it doesn’t exist and hoping that’s convincing. ariya is…pretty sincere, at heart. he doesn’t Perform unless it’s for the greater good, he doesn’t try to be anything he’s not, and who he is MIGHT be a pretty rude and sharp person but that’s who he is. and he’s fine with that.

brian kendrick kinda spits on every single idea of that!

ariya believes he’s an honorable person, but like, ariya will back down and admit he’s outmatched when necessary (that’s kind of a running thing he does, with neville, with braun, etc), where brian is just a dirty coward who cheats and lies and plays dirty all the goddamn time. he’s the man with a plan and his plan is despicable from the beginning! and ariya doesn’t trust that, no one trusts brian, obviously, and i think that they could butt heads in a way that easily transitions into a face turn for ariya.

i think that could happen in a tag team match? not one where they’re pitted against each other, but put on a team. brian’s usually paired up with jack but jack’s got his own shit going on this particular night, so brian needed a new partner, and he came to ariya. and ariya doesn’t trust him for a goddamn second but he doesn’t have anything to do tonight, so he agrees. and then he discusses it with the rest of the gold standard, and tony’s clearly Not Happy that brian would even consider coming to one of them, even if this IS what ariya’s gotta do, and that definitely stays with ariya. because ariya is a dick but he loves tony and drew a lot and he isn’t the most forgiving person of slights against the two.

but brian and ariya team up for the night, they’re taking on, who knows…OH no wait i know, they’re taking on mustafa and akira, ding ding ding! ariya and brian both have past rivalries with akira, but ariya’s got a weird frenemies thing happening with mustafa over twitter at the VERY least, and ariya’s still thinking about how much of a manipulative lying motherfucker brian is. and while they’re in the match, brian pulls some SKETCHY SHIT that results in akira getting pretty fucked up on the turnbuckle, and ariya’s no akira fan but he knows that was fucked up. akira recovers and tags mustafa in and the match moves on, and ariya is stuck on this moment, and he looks back at brian in the corner and thinks, man, i fucking hate this guy

and he makes a decision, to get back at brian for tony’s sake at least and now for akira’s sake as well, because if brian can play dirty, ariya can too, and maybe it’ll teach him something about not being a HUGE SHITHEAD ALL THE TIME. he tags brian in for a double team move and makes a surprise transition; instead of whipping brian into mustafa, he catches brian up in the hammerlock lariat he does! and he takes a moment to kind of process “oh shit, oh SHIT this is happening”, before coming back into focus. and he just shakes it off, nudges brian towards mustafa and gestures to the top rope like “hey i set up your dumb flip for you, you’re welcome”, and just rolls out of the ring. before he starts up the ramp, he catches akira’s eye and nods, and then he’s just Outie, and then it’s just. okay! it’s an ambiguous move and he doesn’t break apart from his heel faction, of course, but it’s a start. it’s at LEAST a move from “allies with monster heels” to “allies with goofass heels and tweeners” territory, and it’s a start.

another opportunity for an ariya face turn, and like, if we’re following this same thread, a CERTAIN, CONFIRMED face turn, is ariya turning on enzo! i will die on the hill of “ariya is trying to get enzo out of here”, but if it happened for real after the above moment, that would be a pretty clear turn into face territory. it’s like…to expand more on ariya’s previous rivalries, it’s like a smaller scale version of what neville did. it’s no secret that drew and tony don’t get along with enzo, but ariya’s working with him because GOD everyone wants enzo to leave wwe. not even just 205, but wwe. please god. and ariya’s thinking that at any rate this COULD mean he gets a friendly title shot opportunity. it won’t. he knows it won’t. enzo’s a cruel stingy son of a bitch he’s never gonna give anyone a title opportunity if he can help it, but ariya thinks he could break ground if he just tries hard enough.

and then that hope is buried for good, because enzo goes after drew, like he’s wont to do. tony starts shit with enzo, and drew steps in to get a match with enzo and finish it, because Of Course He Does, it’s very noble even though tony and drew are both the worst. drew gets a match with enzo, and tony chills on commentary and ariya’s sitting in the back watching and ariya’s just fuming silently, but tolerating it. and then enzo cheats to win, because of course he does. and then for no good reason, he grabs a steel chair to attack drew, because he’s a dick! and tony comes after him, and enzo’s not afraid to attack him, too.

ariya comes out as soon as the steel chairs get involved. it looks for a second like he could be out here to back enzo up. tony and drew get fucken worried for a second that the plan’s gone wrong. but ariya wouldn’t dream of betraying either of them. not ever. if he’s got beef with them, he settles it, he talks through it, that’s how they’re good friends STILL. he doesn’t let things stew, he doesn’t fume over imagined slights silently. ariya’s a lot of things, but he likes to think he’s an honorable person. and there’s no one he’d honor more willingly than these two.

he convinces enzo to give him the chair, and at the last second, he turns it on enzo instead. he chases the rat out of the ring, back up the ramp, and barely spares him a final look before going to check and make sure drew and tony are alright. it doesn’t lead to those two chucklefucks getting a face turn, they’re still VERY embroiled in their own heelish pursuits, but ariya’s given up his pursuit of the title and his attempt to earn enzo’s trust, because he cares about his friends. and he really does consider the tactics he uses that he can see enzo using, too, and he actively starts working to stop using them. he’s not like enzo! he isn’t. he’ll never be like enzo.

and in that, ariya earns his face turn.

also, this isn’t the best argument for it, but ariya’s pretty well learned in high flying, which is a style he hasn’t gotten to use as much as a heel, and the style change from heel to face could be a good factor in that turn? that sentence was worded like DOGSHIT but i hope it made sense haha

also HOOOOOLY SHIT THIS GOT LONGER THAN I EVER WOULD HAVE EXPECTED I KIND OF THINK ABOUT FACE ARIYA A LOT IM SORRY

#catsi #long post -#meta tag #booking tag #JESUS CHWIST #ariya daivari #IM....SO SORRY THIS GOT SO SO SO OUT OF HAND SO SO SO QUICKLY I JUST. LOVE HIM #UHHHHHH PWEASE FEEL FREE TO SKIP THIS POST IT GOT SO SO SO LONG SO QUICKLY IM SCREAMING IM SORRY #FHDSKJDS I.......I......THINK ABOUT FACE!ARIYA A LOT #i hope i worded all of this well hooooooly shit this isnt even everything i wanted to say either #AND LIKE THIS IS WITHOUT J*CK FACTORING INTO ANYTHING EITHER. MAN. MAN!!!!!! HUH #im so sorry thank you for asking this though genuinely i had THE MOST fun talking about it and i love booking these things #and i love 205 and i love talking about it with you!!!!!! thank you so so so much for asking this cat i love you so much omg #im SO SORRY FOR ALL THE WORDS

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neoraven · 4 years

Text

NWA TNA Episode 7-8, New Champs

NWA TNA Episode 7, continued TNA Asylum, Nashville, TN

I fast-forwarded past the Disco Inferno talk segment, and I regret nothing.

Stretcher Match Scott Hall vs Jeff Jarrett

Hall brings a navy green army style stretcher, and he rushes Double J on the entrance ramp to start things off. They brawl over toward the announce table, over, and behind it, through the ring, and back up the entrance way. They're spilling backstage with little use or mention of the stretcher. Jerry Lynn is trying to walk out in street clothes with his little shitty suitcase and Jeff Jarrett gets thrown into him, knocking him through a door. They make another long lap through and behind the crowd before Hall finally gets back to the ring and gets the stretcher. Jarrett uses it as a weapon to take control, making a bridge on the outside and ramming Hall into it a few times. After trading a few different irish whips into the stretcher in the turnbuckle, Hall hits the Razor's Edge for 2, interrupted by Truth, who is interrupted by Monty Brown, and it becomes a clown car of Jerry Lynn, AJ Styles, Don Harris, The New Church interfering and fighting each other as Jarrett and Hall trade very slow nearfalls until barely answering a 10 count. Hall knocks the ref out with a stretcher shot, which truly makes no sense because he just ignored about a dozen different run ins. Ricky The Dragon runs down and induces Jarrett into hitting himself with a chairshot. When Hall goes for the chair, Ricky tries to stop him, and just leads to a Stroke on the chair for Jeff Jarrett Wins, LOL after 12 minutes.

* Christ that was dire. There was at the very least a little bit of fun with Jerry Lynn getting hit randomly backstage, and then the clown car of interference (No joke, at least 10 different people). But the opening brawl had very little action or wrestling moves, and then they skipped to the big main event ending like it was a 30 minute epic, without any of the middle part. Whatever.

NWA TNA Episode 8

We're back at the TNA Asylum, and this one has some high hopes considering we have the NWA Title, X Division Title, and Dupp Cup up for grabs.

Spanish Announce Team vs The Flying Elvises

We got The Maximos and Amazing Red against Estrada, Siaki, and Yang on the other. We start with a big fun brawl. Siaki and his teammates eventually take control under his direction. He takes down Red one on one and eventually gets frustrated with his teammates' dancing, ignoring their tags and hitting his own stuff in the ring. It doesn't take long for Estrada and Yang to get frustrated and leave the corner to join commentary. Yang is doing god's work on commentary, calling Siaki "All Shook Up in the head". They spend a long time trading out quick tags and double teams every time Sonny starts to get the upper hand. Finally, the Maximos hit the Spanish Fly into the Infra-Red, and the other two Elvises rush back into the ring to take control with a flurry of moves. Code Red starts a series of near falls, then Estrada reverses a second Spanish Fly attempt, leaving Red alone to take a top rope combo. Siaki steals the pin from his teammates, continuing the discord after 12 minutes.

** There was some great action, but the part with Siaki alone just seemed to drag. They also still won't pull the trigger on breaking up the group, even though Siaki has singles star written all over him, with the crowd already popping big for nearly anything he does.

The announcers go over the triple main event. Also, just saying for the record, Ed Ferrara is still here on commentary for some reason. Tenay shows a video interview with Apolo.

NWA World Heavyweight Title Match Ken Shamrock [c] vs Ron "The Truth" Killings

Ricky The Dragon Steamboat comes down to commentary and/or to be a ringside official. Shamrock starts in control with some strikes and submissions, but eventually Truth gets free, and hits his trademark flip and splits dodge to get control briefly. They go back and forth, with Truth escaping his submissions quickly to the ropes. Ken botches a slow hurricanrana and comes up in the ankle lock, but Truth escapes and gets dumped to the outside. They show Monty Brown and The New Church watching on, then the security chief moving to the entrance ramp to sit in between them and the match. It's a little bit of a nice touch distracting from the slow, plodding match. Shamrock starts getting frustrated at Truth hanging around, and dumps him to the outside. Apolo rushes the ring past security, starting some chaos near the entrance ramp. Truth ducks an Apolo superkick that hits Shamrock, then pulls the champ into the ring, hits the Truth or Consequences (Stun Gun?) to win the title after 9 minutes.

*1/2 Kind of a dreadful match, but an amazing result. Shamrock was beyond boring as champion, and the clown car interference was as sloppy as usual.

After cleaning up the world title match, Ricky The Dragon comes out to call out Apolo and finally give him a chance to talk. Jarrett interrupts him before he gives Apolo the title shot he wants so bad. He claims reverse discrimination to a stunned Dragon. After a brief exchange, they're doing a number one contender's match, with Dragon as the special guest referee.

Mostly fastfowarded through the Dupp Cup Disco Inferno and Ed Ferrara heavy segment, as well as a boring Mike Tenay and Monty Brown interview.

First Blood Match Malice vs Ron or Don Harris

They start brawling on the outside and Father James Mitchell shows up for commentary. They trade chair shots as the ref hovers, checking for blood. They go all around the arena until going up the ramp, where Slash appears with an ice pick, going after Harris. He loses the ice pick and Harris uses it to open up Slash's forehead as James Mitchell looks on, herding them back toward the ring. Harris fights off Mitchell and Slash, dumping the ceremonial blood on the leader. However, back in the ring, Malice takes control and opens up Harris with a chair, ending this in 6 minutes.

1/2* A dumb mess, and not in the fun, entertaining way.

Taylor Vaughn and Bruce get into it backstage and start an evening gown match. AJ Styles and Low Ki also brawl through the area.

Number One Contender Match Apolo vs Jeff Jarrett ; Referee - Ricky The Dragon Steamboat

They start out slow, and Ricky quickly steps in to stop a Jarrett closed fist. After another tie up, he stops Apolo from doing the same. Apolo keeps control with some power moves and agility, despite getting distracted by Steamboat's tight officiating. Jarrett regains control using the steps on the outside. He opens up his forehead, and slams him into the announce table, but Steamboat stops him before he can use a chair and pushes them back in the ring. Jarrett keeps control despite getting in trouble with the closed fist over and over, getting the bloodied Apolo in a long, boring Figure 4. He fires up, and eventually drops Jarrett with a big superkick that gets Jarrett to 2 point foot-on-the-ropes. Another big German Suplex seems like only goes for two when Jarrett gets the arm up, but Ricky counts three…. On Apolo! What a geek!

**3/4 Jarrett Wins, LOL, but it actually makes sense and tells a decent little story. Wish it wasn't burying the talented Apolo, but oh well, gotta get Jarrett over!

Ricky gets his security losers to drag an enraged Apolo to the back. Ricky gets on the mic and gives Jarrett "The Truth" as a tag team partner vs the tag champs next week.

Evening Gown Match Bruce [c] vs Taylor Vaughn

Actually, no thank you. Bruce retained and then showed off his naked body in a thong anyways. Let's move on.

X Division Title Match AJ Styles [c] vs Jerry Lynn vs Low Ki

They start out a little cautious, then double team the champion, taking AJ out before turning on each other. It's hard to keep up with each move, but they're going at each other at warp speed pretty much. They keep hitting planned and unplanned double team moves to each other back to back. There are a couple good nearfalls and triple pinning predicaments. Low Ki gets his dragon sleeper finisher on both opponents in turn before it gets broken up. After another series of nearfalls, they do a tower of doom spot with Jerry Lynn unable to put away either opponent afterward. Lynn stops a Styles Clash attempt, then breaks up Low Ki's Dragon Sleeper in the corner. They start going for each other's finishers now, as AJ kicks out of Low Ki's Styles Clash, then Low Ki out of Lynn's Ki Krusher, and finally, Lynn out of AJ's Cradle Piledriver. Right after, Low Ki goes flipping into the ref, then out of the ring. AJ and Lynn collide in the ring in a double cross body, leaving everyone down and out. The champ grabs a chair and takes out Jerry Lynn before going to the top. Low Ki slips in for a quick pin, staying on top of Jerry Lynn through AJ's move, to steal the X championship after 15 minutes or so.

****1/4 Amazing match, showing the best of the X division and all of NWA TNA in general.

Jarrett and Truth yell at each other in the back while AJ and Lynn brawl in the ring still after the title match. Truth and Jarrett brawl to the entrance way as the announcers put over the two volatile teams.

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