#good book btw just have to deal with uncomfortable feelings

[cherryficmc]

“Oh yeah I love studying psychology! Is so fun! :)”

*Having to deal with my own mortality*

“Oh… I forgot about that :(“

#my prof sent us a text about death now I’m not that well #AND THIS GRADED #good book btw just have to deal with uncomfortable feelings #death is a day worth living #<- name of the book #(it’s originally in portuguese so good luck) #psychology #rambles #psychology student #psychology studyblr

[whispangleblogger]

I am not somebody that hops onto the "comic discourse" a lot. I usually prefer to talk things through with my friends and share opinions in private.

But since Tangle more or less got ignored so far i take the chance and talk a bit about her appearance in 64

She jumps in as a supportive character towards Whisper and helps her to prevent another breakdown. While yes, there was a scene in Urban Warfare that did the exact same thing, i feel like with issue 64 we finally see how strong of an impact this support actually has on the page. (I talk a bit more about Urban Warfare further down this post.) I don't even dare and call this bait (Edit: Not my words btw. i saw this used in another heated post. I personally never felt baited in any form. If anything, the girls relationship is one big highlight in these comics.) because it simply isn't. Here is a character that cares for her partner and also is uncomfortable with the whole situation to begin with. She has to decide where her priorities lie. Her reaction is to be expected to be focused on a trembling Whisper and all i can say is i'm glad we finally have a good depiction of that.

Tangle has the right to approach Whisper in ways i think no other character is able to, she earned it and it pretty much shows on this page. Softly taking down Whisper's mask and checking on her, the body language in these panels is chefs kiss. She's truly a bouncy girl, but it's good to see her being serious every now and then, i feel like it's a side of her that people usually tend to ignore. (And i really don't know why that is.) Evan Stanley does always an amazing job if it comes to showing Tangle in a different light or how she cares about her friends and loved ones. In regards about the current arc and even the last one, i feel like this post is a good chance to add my personal take to it as well, since it's been on my mind for a good while now. I feel like 64 finally makes a step into the right direction again.

To elaborate a little on that, i wasn't really a big fan of Urban Warfare, simply for the fact that it's pacing is all over the place. There were a lot of things that needed to be covered, to name a few: - new team building - Whisper's trauma - Lanolin introduced as a new character - a LOT of other teams jumping into the scene - the city itself all squeezed into a 5 book arc. One more book compared to a mini series that usually gives full focus to a set of chosen characters.

To make this clear, there are also good things in Urban Warfare as well but thanks to the fact how rushed the whole story felt in it's core it's a bit hard to enjoy the good bits as well...

Misadventures still deals with the same pacing problem and i believe that is where the real issue lies. As a reader/collector of the books and longtime fan of them, all i can say is:

I wish the comics would get their old, well cared, time for details back. Yes, a story like the Metal Virus was a long run but in the end it was a fantastic read. Mini arcs like Trial by Fire (Still one of my favorites), that focus on other things instead of the usual action, are also very important for character development and add a lot of depth to them. Endless Summer is a great example for such addition as well. These books provide insight into character interaction we usually don't see otherwise. Of course i have no idea how much SEGA is involved into everything if it comes to general decisions like how long one arc is supposed to last and when the next one should start.

(The next part is based on my personal taste, this has nothing to do with the general narrative of the books. I just want to share my thoughts about this since i really don't write them down a lot.)

As a little side note, i feel like Lanolin is a great character so far. Her stubborn and rule book like demeanor as a leader is refreshing to say the least. She also seems to be really close to how her creator ABT imagines her to be and i really appreciate that. But i can't help it and feel like her team dynamic with Tangle and Whisper comes of as rather… rocky ? On a combat level of things it works really good but on a friendship level it's somehow lacking atm. There is this boss and coworker relationship going on that feels more like real work. Obviously though she's new and needs more time to get better established. I guess we will see how this plays out in the future. I'm all in for a good or funny team dynamic but i also can't help it and feel like she works better as an addition to Jewel, running the restoration, the navigator typ that sends intel via com instead of a field combatant. Even if she proved she's good at close combat as well during her encounter with Whisper in 64. That being said, i am all open for surprises and more character development on her part. This is really just a "now" opinion and can easily change over time. I like the sheep, i really do.

#IDW Sonic #Whisper the Wolf #Tangle the Lemur #Whispangle #Just some thoughts i wanted to get out of my head #long opinion posts always take forever to write - language barrier demands extra brain juice - cries in german #Thanks to my friends SomethingSonicRelated - Honeydew - DillyWolf and ScurvyPiratehog for looking over this post #providing some additions as well #64 was a good read overall #the Whispangle moment was soft and needed #not adding more details about the issue in general since i still try to keep the theme of the blog as it's focus. #I think the post speaks for itself :> #There are still moments i hold really high and dear to me from the last arc #best example's probably my pinned post heh <3

[lilaccoffin]

Had some thoughts today...about their relationship...

Mostly how Chai's envy towards Vanilla gradually culminates into their falling out.

Like, they both have a lot of similarities and differences that contribute to Chai deciding to ghost Vani, both being dudes struggling with inferiority complexes in different ways. Chai handles his by gassing himself up to be the coolest dude ever because no one can call you a loser if you don't act like one, right? And his slacker attitude going hand in hand with his fear of rejection. If you don't try and put your best into stuff or do anything, it won't sting as much if someone tells you you sucked or rejects you, right?

For Vanilla, he copes with these feelings of inferiority by working his ass off to prove himself, masking his autistic behaviors and being as by-the-book as much as possible. Sure, he isn't always 100% compliant, I mean, he's lying to his parents about his major so that he can do what he actually wants to do, but for the most part, he's the type of guy who thinks doing things like they're instructed to be done will reward him. This results in all of his anxiety and stress in school. He basically overexerts himself where Chai does not.

I've boiled down three things that Chai's envious of and it's Vanilla's friend group in college, school stuff, and finally, the band that came to talk to their class.

1: The Friends...

At the start of the game, Chai tells Peppermint he's better off by himself and in general you get this air that Chai is a loner. (Using Lonely Boy as the opening song of the game is also uh...y'know, a huge indicator.) A lot of the fan base (me included) headcanon that Chai had a really hard time making friends growing up. He was the weird kid, and some (if not most) of the teasing also came from a place of ableism. I know a lot of us also headcanon Chai to have ADHD and that paired with him not being able to fully use his right arm gave bullies a lot of material. I remember someone (edit: FOUND THEIR POST, psychangels said this and it's a really good post btw) mentioning Chai dealing with pity/fake friends too and I can definitely see that and how it contributes to him being cautious of new "friends." Vanilla was pretty lucky to even get as close to Chai as he did. The shared love of music and having classes together were probably the main reasons their friendship worked for as long as it did (not very long, but not very short). Well, Chai wasn't Vanilla's only friend, even if it seemed like it at times with how often Vanilla wanted to be around him. He has a group of gothic pals who care about him a lot, most of them being people he met in middle school that he was happy to be able to go to high school and now uni with. Chai tends to just observe them from a distance because Vanilla's friends don't really like him very much over some of his crappy behavior towards Vani, and he sees how close and happy they are. Makes him wish he had that, but he tries his best to ignore it since years of bullying have made it really uncomfortable for him to accept genuine connection or kindness. It's already tough when Vanilla is so nice to him, a friend group full of that? Makes him nervous to even think about it. Though Vani and his friends aren't the type to fake anything, he's still weary.

2: School...

So, yeah, Chai isn't getting the best grades whereas Vanilla is getting straight A's. Again, Vanilla works his little ass off to get the grades his parents want him to have and Chai doesn't put that much effort into his work. To him, half-assing it also diminishes the sting of rejection if his professors don't like any of his genuine work, so getting Cs and Ds are good enough. Even with music focused classes Chai tends to take it easy. I can see him being the kind of guy to ask why they need to study the other stuff that has nothing to do with how to make music? Still, his slacker persona tends to aggravate a lot of his professors and they tend to exhibit some pretty nasty behavior towards Chai for it. Since Vanilla is hardworking and contributes to class discussions a lot, they're a lot more generous to him and have definitely cracked jokes about Vanilla's work vs Chai's. Vanilla would just nervously laugh while Chai rolled his eyes. God, actually, I don't doubt professors would make mean jokes often about those two. Probably begging Vanilla not to let Chai influence him. Vanilla didn't exactly do much about those jokes except wave/nervously laugh them off. He should have stood up to them and told them to stop making fun of Chai but, well, that kind of thing doesn't come easy to him (looks at him lying to his parents instead of putting his foot down with them about himself and his life and also how they would aaalways compare him and his older brother, which, yeah it bothered Vanilla to have their professors do the EXACT same thing with him and Chai, but...again, not REALLY great about confrontation during this time). Yeah, the way professors treat Vanilla compared to how they treat Chai also made Chai envious of Vani. Especially when it was something Vanilla could have helped to some degree if he told these people to shut up, but it's not like Chai expected him to stand up for him, either. Why would he? Why would anyone?

3: Last, the visit from the band...

Okay so, I've gone to community and uni, and it's not unheard of for a professor to have people agree to come in and talk to their students about stuff regarding the subjects they're studying. I've had professors who know some pretty neat people invite them to talk to us, so I imagine one of Chai and Vanilla's professors have done the same. I've written this scenario out before, but to TL:DR it, a band that actually went to their university and met in their classes agreed to come on down and talk to them all about the industry and how they do their thing. They went the full mile and brought their instruments and shared a short excerpt of a song with them, too. The band ended up being a band both Chai and Vanilla liked as well, so it was a pretty sick class that day! Vanilla gushes to Chai about how rad and inspiring it was and Chai offhandedly tells him he should share that new song he wrote with them and see what they think, not thinking Vanilla would actually go and do that, despite how he always considers Chai's suggestions. The band ends up really liking it and asking Vanilla if they could play a bit of it to hear it out loud, which makes him nearly faint (it's a good thing most of the class had left by then and it was just him, Chai, their professor, and the band, who was just about to put their stuff away to go). Chai's happy for Vanilla, but then he thinks back to the time he met his favorite band and how they received him...blowing him off completely (took some inspo from kennyswurvegurl's post here for the visual 'cause, damn, it hit hard). It led Chai into a bit of a spiral afterwards, wondering if maybe he really didn't have a future in all of this because of the cruelty he's faced from so many people. Seeing Vanilla flourish was every bit as painful as it was great. Sure, he tried to fall back into his cocky behavior to not think about it so much, but it was getting tougher with each snarky remark from a professor, each glare from Vani's friend group, and Vani himself being so hyped around him, the fake him.

It all just gets worse when Vanilla runs by the idea of starting a band together after Uni. In Vanilla's mind, it was a great way for them to fulfill their respective dreams of being rock stars and filling in for each other on the roles they couldn't do (Vanilla wants to sing but can't because of his monotone voice and Chai can't play guitar because of his arm.Sso in Vani's head, them doing each thing would be fine, right?). Chai just gets upset at the idea, feeling like he's being pitied all over again and that he's only going to achieve his dream by bumming off of Mr. straight A's? Nah. He rejects the offer, and after a week he drops out of college. It...super sucks for Vanilla because he thought the world of Chai. Sure, his friends get him to take off the damn rose tinted glasses after they tell him Chai wasn't really that great of a friend, but he still feels awful about Chai ghosting him and his own faults in their friendship.

#doodlies #hi fi rush #vanilla #oc x canon #KINDA...? it's their crumble fumble... #oh my god this got so long.. #this always happens with me idk why I'm always shocked FDJSLF #thank u to anyone who reads <3 #vanichai makes me ill...

[ca-suffit]

it's so interesting to witness just the lack of understanding of the difference between racist work (ar books) and a work that contains/deals with racism (the show) among your troll anons this is the fundamental distinction

white supremacy does this on purpose btw. because if u keep white ppl confused about what's the "right" type of racism to talk about, coddle the discomfort white ppl feel when seeing this shit for real and say "it's okay, racism is over, this is just attention seeking bs," then u can keep up the protective lie that there's nothing to examine or do. u can say it's okay to keep doing nothing, this isn't a real problem. this is what happens in the real world every day and it's not a coincidence that fandom reflects this too.

some ppl can't hear the books are racist because it makes *them* feel racist. it happened live right here. u can read racist shit and not be racist. plenty of book ppl are able to do that. but then u have the type who needs everything to be "pure" from the start, so they'll come at u saying anne rice wrote critically about slavery and all kinds of other shit when it's v clear she did not lol. they just have to believe that so much to feel like good ppl for liking the books. girl it's easier to just say shit's racist and call it a day.

and the show makes white ppl uncomfortable cuz ppl weren't expecting it to be so black and show white french lestat as the ignorant white european he is, the ignorant white partner he is. so now it's ooc and an AU (when did u ever call the film or play an AU, it's only an AU when it's black ppl?? okay) and assurance that we won't have to talk about race anymore soon cuz it'll be the white man speaking and telling "the truth."

white supremacy rly got everyone fucked up and then they hate a bitch who gets loud about it. ppl know what they're doing when they say this stuff. they're stupid but they're also intentionally weaponizing stupidity to be racist.

#asks #interview with the vampire #amc interview with the vampire #interview with the vampire amc #iwtv amc #amc iwtv #iwtv 2022 #vampire chronicles #fandom racism

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

idk why this bugs me a bit but I really don’t like when you see art or writing that delves into the dynamic between characters in a less positive way - like an argument, or clashes between coping mechanisms, or a miscommunication that causes some problems and doesn’t get immediately resolved - and you get people saying stuff like “oh they’re so fucked up” or “this would not be healthy irl but here it’s cute” and I just. what do you think a healthy relationship looks like. it’s never going to be perfect. people disagree. not everything gets resolved perfectly. sometimes there will be parts of a person you will never completely understand no matter how close you are to them. what matters is communicating in the ways that you can (which isn’t always in the way help books or therapists tell you to btw! there are lots of ways to communicate effectively that are specific to who you are as people), making active efforts to show your care (which yes, sometimes isn’t easy. that’s why it’s an effort), and enjoying this person’s company (they should make you feel good to be around overall! clashing a little is okay but they should not make you miserable!)

anyways I guess it also irritates me because I see these kinds of comments a lot under studies having to do with characters struggling with trauma or mental illness and therefore not communicating in necessarily healthy or productive ways and maybe always having issues that do not get resolved perfectly and I really can’t stand it. we already live in a world where people have to pretend to be fine all the time. I’m quite flattered when people are comfortable enough with me to let that veneer go. they feel safe around me! what a compliment! I always feel like that’s so much more than I deserve. sure things can be uncomfortable at times and I do sometimes have to say “I can’t listen or help right now but please tell me later” and that’s ok! because we all want to make sure we’re safe for each other to come talk to. to be honest with. a little personal discomfort at times is worth it. always.

people are messy. you’ve got to let people be messy. friendships, relationships, etc, they take time and effort from everyone involved. learning to manage less than ideal situations actually is going to help you draw better boundaries against things that are actually “fucked up” or toxic than expecting perfection, or for a happily ever after where all the conflicts you started out with get resolved.

idk. it’s just. people you care about deserve to not have to be ideal around you. likewise you deserve to have to not be ideal around them. isn’t that. the whole point of someone knowing your soul? the ugliness? and the way it’s a package deal with the rest of you? I would like to learn you. I don’t just want your scraps. I want every part of the whole I asked for. I will learn to manage the sharper edges.

#ugh ok so there’s a lot of nuance I couldn’t cover here this is more of a mini rant but yeah. #some of you do not know what ‘fucked up’ actually looks like I think… #fucked up dynamics are fun to play with! but a functional relationship that happens to have some issues is not it! #especially when the issues have to do with past trauma or mental health issues. kind of gross man. #I guess it extra confused me too because like. I’ve never found it to be overly stressful or a big issue to accommodate people? #I don’t find it overly taxing. At least not anymore than socializing in general #in fact I like it better because now I have a goal to focus on in the interaction - make person feel comforted/better/supported/safe #most interactions I feel like I’m flailing lol #agh anyways. bye #storyrambles

[thedeal-if]

Not gonna lie here, but something kinda died inside of me, when i saw that Nathan is pretty much allergic to children(cause i adore them irl), but it made me wonder about two things.

Oh and i can completely understand why certain ROs are just not made to have childeren.

1: I was wondering why can't angels get children, considering that irl there are beeings like nephilim/cambions described in Myths, Tales, Books etc.. Does that mean that in this universe there are no halfbreeds(not meant in a derogatory way), between different species?

2: Following up with the ask about kids, how would the ROs react(those who actually can get children in a biological way), to accidently becoming a parent? Answer only if comfortable

I have to say that maybe I worded it wrong but Nathan isn't allergic to children, dw anon!! He has always had very important things on his plate and it has never left him any time to think about anything else. It's kinda sad but Nathan only began to truly live his life the moment he started to Fall.

When it comes to children, if his partner asked he'd be like "Oh, that's right, those exist" and just *shrug*. Nathan has never given having kids any thought but he could be convinced ^^

He is very much allergic to being responsible tho... But who knows? People evolve, they can change. They can meet good influences, bad influences. Really, who knows?

1. Okay, td lore! I'm trying not to mention much and I'm crossing my fingers not to get asked about my worldbuilding because I cave to pressure too easily and will definitely gush lol. Tbh I thought it'd be much more fun for people to realize this as they play, finding out things alongside MC and all that. But maybe some explanations are in order 🕴️

To clarify: Christian/Catholic/Judaism/etc lore is, of course, the foundation of my own, but don't expect me to follow the Bible to a t 🫂 I always meant for The Deal to be a reimagining of religion as we know it, but I've included many more layers in terms of... everything (ex. Lovecraftian lore)! I think it's pretty interesting to take the core of a topic and rewrite some of it to make it more exciting.

Needless to say, I don't mean any disrespect towards religion in any way shape or form but sticking to it blindly has always rubbed me the wrong way as a person who isn't and has never been religious.

Now, the answer to your question (sorry for the rant 😭💕) ik about Nephilim and cambions (as someone who's read superstition a billion times), and Nephilim aren't a thing here. Cambions are tho!

When it comes to Angels... Think of them as one of those automated machines in factories. They fulfill their function and are scraped or thrown away when broke beyond repair. That's kind of how the Gods see Angels.

I've promised myself to say nothing about Genies until MC at least meets Aliyah. But let's just say she can't procreate either.

2. As for the accidental parent scenario I'll leave it below the cut (dw btw I'd say it's pretty hard to make me uncomfortable lol I'll answer anything)

Dante, Lilith, Josh, Victor, and Eden can have biological children! Villanelle is technically on that list but she's very much sex repulsed and won't ever be in this situation🫂

Though Dante isn't stoked at the thought of children this kind of changes when he thinks of that kid as his. He's not that taken aback by surprises—even if they're major ones like having a child—Dante likes taking challenges with a smile. If he feels like it's his choice and his partner isn't forcing the idea of parenthood on him, Dante would accept his role with a very positive outlook ^^

Doesn't mean he'll be a good dad tho lol

Lilith feels deeply troubled by her nature and thinks that it'd be best not to create any more beings of hell. She has ingrained a very cataclysmic point of view about any potential children she might have. To Lilith, motherhood is a dream. But not like that.

She'd be such a good mom tho💕

Josh feels like he's been punched in the gut lol he can't handle unexpected turns of events. If it's something his partner is excited about Josh would try not to bring the mood down, he'd want to see it as a positive thing. Definitely would read parenthood blogs for hours during the entire pregnancy.

Victor would be so excited I think he'd forget about any complicated situations and all his problems as soon as his partner told him. It's always been one of Victor's deepest and most profound dreams, and to have his partner fulfill it— he would never dare to even consider it an accident. Much like Josh he'd be the World's most prepared Upcoming Dad™ lol

Eden doesn't typically panic but he would lose his mind lol. I said he kind of leaned towards preferring not to have children but for the entire situation to be forced on him like that would be overwhelming. If the situations are right, if Eden feels like he has the specific kind of support he would need to parent a child... He might change his mind and not be so negative about it ^^

#the deal if #the deal #inferno #nathan #ask #ros #dante #lilith #josh #villanelle #victor #aliyah #eden

[unquietspiritao3]

Interrupting Your Irregularly-Scheduled Fic-Related Content with An Extremely Long Note on The Situation in British Comedy

Hi there. If you don’t want to read about my thoughts on everything happening in the British comedy scene at the moment, feel free to give this a skip. I totally understand needing to take a step away from such things. But I felt it was important to address, given some of the characters in my stories are based on the people involved/being criticized. I’m also going to link this post in the author’s note of my next chapter update, but feel free to share it before then with those who might not be on Tumblr.

CW: non-detailed mentions of transphobia, sexual assault, and childhood sexual abuse

Okay. I think to start, I need to explain a few of things about me.

First, as I alluded to in the opening author’s note for Should’ve been obvious, I am just an American with a moderate obsession with British panel shows and not enough time to keep up with the entire British comedy world. I jumped into writing in this fandom with huge gaps in my knowledge, which was possibly not wise.

Second, as a way to protect my own mental health and under the advice of my therapist, I’m what you might call ‘terminally offline.’ Before I reactivated this blog for the purpose of sharing fic inspo, I had not been on social media for over a year. I still don’t use it outside of Tumblr, where I follow a very narrow selection of blogs that mostly post Taskmaster gifs (love you all, btw). I don’t watch or read the news. I have systems in place with my friends and family to keep me informed when something really big happens, but outside of that, I am purposefully oblivious. The consequence of this is that I did not know about the two situations I’ll be discussing until I saw some stray posts this past weekend, and that’s why I didn’t address it before.

Third, I always (to a fault, my friends would say) give absolutely everyone the benefit of the doubt and see the best in people until they prove otherwise—and even then, even while holding them accountable and removing them from my life if need be, I try to be compassionate. That’s not going to change; it’s just who I am.

Now for the two situations, my thoughts on them, and their impact on my writing.

The Richard Ayoade Thing

I’ve said before that I’m genderqueer (she/they, equally happy with both, btw). I’m not down with transphobia. But I’ve read that Richard is a separate-the-art-from-the-artist kind of guy, so his personal views aren’t entirely clear to me. That said, the blurb he gave makes me uncomfortable because to me it seems to imply he does agree with the views in the book. I don’t know much about Richard and haven’t consumed much content with him other than Big Fat Quiz and some random clips of various shows, so please point me to anything that would confirm or refute this. For now, I’ll leave it there. In terms of my writing, this isn’t as big of a deal, since the Richard character isn’t central to anything and could be easily retconned out if I wanted to, but I’ll talk more about the writing at the end.

The Noel Fielding Thing re: Russell Brand

Like most Americans, I was introduced to Noel through GBBO. (Well, to be fully honest, I watched the Buzzcocks spanking clips long before then, because those get passed around in spanko circles, but I didn’t know, or care, who the guy in both of them was at the time. It took awhile for my crush on him to develop.) I’ve actually never seen The Mighty Boosh or much of Noel’s standup; he’s just a bit too surreal and nonsensical for me to enjoy when he’s in complete creative control. I’ve watched interviews going back to the time he was promoting Luxury Comedy, all his episodes of Big Fat Quiz, and some episodes of Buzzcocks, in addition to GBBO. I knew he and Russell Brand and had good on-screen chemistry, but I had no idea they were off-screen friends to some degree (at least, they were in the past; more on that below) until this weekend. I also didn’t know that Noel was ever accused of being in a relationship with a 16-year-old when he was in his 30s. I experienced sexual abuse throughout my childhood. Obviously, if that accusation is true, it’s completely unacceptable regardless of the legality in the UK and I will no longer be a fan of Noel.

But rather than try to break down all my complicated feelings on this situation regarding Noel, I’m just going to link to this post, which I agree with 100%, including the part about respecting people who feel differently. The two follow-up posts on the same blog give some good additional info/thoughts. I’m working on doing my own digging, trying to find anything relevant, including the source of the claim that the then-girl in the supposed relationship denied it too. No luck there so far, [EDIT: shared what I found here and it’s in Noel’s favor!] though I have discovered that she (now a woman in her 30s) and Noel currently follow each other on Instagram, and that Noel doesn’t follow Russell Brand (nor can I find a time Noel mentioned him after 2020, right about when it seems like Brand’s right-wing conspiracy-theory crap started). Make of that what you will. Personally, it makes me give Noel the benefit of the doubt unless and until further info is revealed.

Somewhat of a side note: It seems like people are most upset about the lack of a public statement from Noel, specifically. However, what I find odd overall is how there hasn’t been a real statement from any big-name British comic. Lou Sanders was basically strong-armed into saying some stuff in an interview that was supposed to be about her book. Katherine Ryan is very clear she doesn’t want to speak about it despite being the one that called him a predator on Roast Battle years ago. There’s this article about the problem in comedy more generally which several female comics are quoted in, and this one from 2020 including Fern Brady (highly recommend you read both if you can stomach it) but no specific quotes on Brand from names I recognize even there. Radio silence. UK people, can you tell me, is this normal because of the libel laws you all have? From what I understand, it’s much, much easier to be sued for defamation against a public figure and lose over there than over here. Should we expect to wait for an arrest or conviction (if that happens) before people feel safe commenting? Or what is going on?

Impact on My Writing and Final Thoughts

I’ve been having a hard time mental-health-wise, these past few days, reconciling the human need to connect to art with the fact that all art is created by imperfect humans and you simply cannot know what is in someone else’s head or past. That includes my own art. I want it to be an escape for you all, for you to feel safe reading it, but like everyone else, I’m imperfect, and part of that imperfection is not knowing what to do.

At least for now, I’m going to be focused on More than that, and Noel and Richard have never been in the plan to appear in this fic. As for the future, I’m undecided. I feel like I need more info, but I also recognize that we might not ever get real answers.

The sad truth is that writing fanfic always comes with the risk that the thing you’ve been inspired by is later revealed to be problematic. Even if not with these two, something could come to light at any time about any of these people we base our characters on. That last Guardian article I linked should give everyone chills.

I think the best I can do with the info I have today is to say I’m writing about a fictional universe populated with fictional characters, and my use of real people to inspire those characters does not mean I endorse their actions or beliefs; past, present, or future; known or unknown to me at this time. I also want to say, though, that I respect anyone who feels they can’t engage with certain fandoms or fics. Trust me, I do understand.

Take care of yourselves. I care about you so much, internet strangers. 💜

edit: linked the wrong article quoting fern, so added that

[rancidtae]

ARCADIA’S LULLABY | CHAPTER 4

Genre: Mafia AU. Vigilante AU. Sci-fi (AI). Warnings: non-consensual drug use Pairing: exo & Original Female Character (Jung Jiah/Kang Rina) - Kim Minseok/Original Female Character - Zhang Yixing/Original Female Character Word count: 5k chapter summary: while the team is tailing Rina, Baekhyun gets hit with a feeling he thought he'd forgotten. a/n: I feel like a bunny calico critter scattering easter eggs here and there. btw this is where our flashbacks start, so keep an eye out for the date tags at the beginning of each scene

remember what's gone before not loaded with regret

masterlist meet the characters

081222 - 11:00 pm

Byun Baekhyun's a homebody. Always has been.

As the overseer of, well... everything, project manager, and human tech support, his days consist of sitting at the base of operations, otherwise known as home. You’ll find him surrounded by his monitors, headset always in place, eyes everywhere at once.

If there’s a security camera or a mic near, he’ll have eyes and ears on the scene.

Guaranteed, baby.

But he's not against changing the routine from time to time. If anything it’s healthy for his back. He’s 30 now. Paying for years of bad posture is proving to be unavoidable. 

And when it came to this, he had to see it for himself, right?

Because what better opportunity than being hit with the discovery that your childhood friend, who you considered dead for the past decade, is out there, alive?

And if that’s not enough of a plot twist, get this: someone just put up a generous price on her head. 

He’s here to make things a little less invasive after tampering her security system. Sending Sehun, a stranger, to enter her personal space while she’s out at a party simply felt wrong. Granted, he hasn’t seen her or spoken a word to her for at least a decade, but that’s what happens when you think someone’s dead and you’re not the type to fuck around with the Ouija board.

But they spent their childhoods and the uncomfortable purgatory that teenage years are together. They held a funeral for mintchoco, the tiny little lizard at Arcadia, her father’s Arcade joint, and buried him at the park two blocks away. She framed some guy for distribution of tentacle porn at the church youth club because he burned him with a cigarette. He was there for her first breakup and her emo phase. She burned his eyebrows off playing hot potato.

You don't just forget about things like that. It all must count for something, that’s what he tells himself as he pushes the door to her empty apartment open.

“Hi, Rina.”

“You know she’s not here, right?” Sehun says behind him, the entrance corridor’s light turning on make him jump and clutch his heart.

He forgot the guy was there. It's always the same with him and Jongin, they walk so quietly, it’s like dealing with a couple of overgrown cats.

“Yep, I’m aware. I’m just practicing.”

He’s spent the last week thinking about what he’ll say to her once Yixing stops gatekeeping her attention, suggesting a sturdier doorlock might be too much of a giveaway. 

This is it. A typical small loft made of white walls and laminated floor. A small bathroom right by the entrance, a compact c shaped kitchen with a short bar table and two chairs tucked in. The living room consists of a simple green Ikea sofa with a table and a tv in front of it. There’s also a desk next to a globe lamp and a bookcase. It has little to no space available, all the books fit snugly into place.

It’s… cozy, homely down to the details; small potted plants, a quirky variety of mugs, more plants by the balcony, a cat rug on the narrow stair leading up to the open mezzanine. There’s a messy bed up there, just on top of the kitchen.

Sehun hates those. It's common knowledge. He always hits his head on the ceiling.

Speaking of, he's flicking through her vinyl collection. “She’s got good taste.”

“How is it?” Junmyeon asks through the line. He’s back at home with Kyungsoo. They're overseeing the operation while Jongin, Jongdae and Chanyeol are tailing her.

Fucking weird. 

It’s undeniable; someone lives here. This is the space of a functioning adult. It’s hard to picture her when she was neither of those things when they last saw each other.

“You can take a look for yourselves,” Baekhyun says, finding the perfect spot for the nano cam on a frog figurine. “All good, Kyungsoo?” 

“All good,” he confirms. He sounds stiff, more than usual.

Baekhyun’s not any less uncomfortable than him about planting spying devices on her, but everyone agrees and understands why it’s necessary. Usually, he’d just hack into her tv camera or her laptop, but none of those devices gave a decent POV. 

One camera is aimed at the entrance and another is angled from the kitchen. He puts the last one on a corner of the living room, looking in from the balcony. He does his best to avoid her bed upstairs.

“You hid them well?” Jongdae asks. Everyone’s on the line tonight except for Yixing and Minseok. “You know it won’t be pretty if she ever finds out.” 

“I’ll come back and take them off myself once we’re sure she’s clear.”

“She can throw a fit if she likes. Faking her death means she loses privacy rights.” Chanyeol says.

“Alright Vladimir,” Baekhyun shakes his head at the amused glance Sehun gives him from the kitchen. He looks like a Barbie trapped in a Polly Pocket house.

“I’m just saying. Be an asshole, get treated like one.”

The recent discovery of Jung Jiah has had polarizing effect on the team. No one’s been more vocal about their discontent with her than Chanyeol, but that’s to be expected, and Kyungsoo’s sulky as well, spending more time with his plants on the terrace.

While Jongdae and Junmyeon remain as neutral as they can, Yixing’s with him on this one. The two agree that as long as they’re in the dark when it comes to her whereabouts, passing judgment on her is not a fair move.

Minseok, on the other hand, has been making himself extra busy at work, all death-trap eyes when he thinks people are not looking, no feedback during meetings when she's brought up, so that’s bound to be interesting. 

There’s of course a Kim Namjoon factor around her that they can’t ignore.

Minseok and Junmyeon got home that Friday night with the certainty that he knew, and that he intended to drop the revelation on them. 

One thing is clear in the middle of all that confusion, he wants to use her as leverage. He waited until Minseok signed the syndicate deal, successfully infiltrating the organization after months of negotiations, and put her on the table like all five of Exodia's card reunited.

But that doesn't explain the biggest mystery of them all. How did Kang Rina go from being locked up in a federal prison in the middle of nowhere, to the center of Seoul's crime ecosystem as a uni student/journalist under the name of Jung Jiah?

New name, new life, writing for a newspaper, pissing off the wrong crowd, a deadly post it note with Kim Namjoon scribbled on it attached to her head.

“How’s it going in there?” Sehun asks.

“So far so good. Jongin approached her. She's acting tough, but she doesn’t look too upset about it.” Chanyeol says.

It’s too bad that Jongin turned off his mic. There’s a bet going about whether or not she’ll respond to his charm. Jongdae swears Jongin’s everyone’s type when he works his magic, but Baekhyun disagrees. He’s too tall, too young and he’s missing the cat eyes.

For now, Baekhyun's putting the emotional shock to the side and handling this like she set a life-sized board game for them to figure out. If there’s one thing he had in common with her, is being a mystery enjoyer.

There are smartly placed storage cabinets everywhere to save up room like in most of these small single-bedroom apartments. She’s made good use of her entryway closet, it’s stacked with winter shoes, coats, all sorts of bags, and two or three umbrellas.

“Sehun, get your hands out of the fridge, you didn't even wash your hands.” Kyungsoo scolds. 

“She has cat food, but I don't see a cat” Sehun hums. “And for the record, Baekhyun was going through her underwear drawer before he set up the cameras.”

“What?”

“See how he’s not even denying it?"

Baekhyun might’ve fought the false accusations, but he happened to be going through her coats and just noticed a barely noticeable irregularity on the wall– a seam where there shouldn’t be one. Pushing everything to the side and inspecting the interior more closely, he runs his hands along the smooth wooden surface.

Wood, not wall. 

And exactly like he was hopping, there’s a line there, he feels it.

“Kyungsoo, I left the security UI tab open, can you do something for me real quick?” he asks, using his phone flashback to inspect the sides of the closet, finding a blank outlet. 

“Sure.”

“Look through the 220 volts outlets and devices. Uh– there should be one for the ac units, the washing machine, the water heater, cooktop…” he starts counting with his fingers “It’s definitely a circuit of its own.”

“I see a weird one, it doesn't have a name though.” Kyungsoo mumbles.

“It’s a date,” Junmyeon says. “October 10, 2020. Does that sound familiar?”

No, but they can figure that out later. 

“Can you try that one? Just poke it, see if anything happens.” 

And just like that, a section of the wall springs forward with a quiet click. Baekhyun just can’t help the delighted grin that takes over his face. He loves his job, he really does. It's unfortunate that her name came up and she's in danger, but she doesn't disappoint.

“Gotcha, Rinrin.”

“Can you stop talking like she’s there in the room with you? It’s creepy.” Jongdae says.

Chanyeol calls his name. "I think you’re losing that bet."

“What makes you say that?” he asks idly, pushing the door open. 

“She just looked at Jongin like he’s nothing more than a piece of meat.” 

“Jongin, if you’re listening, reel it in, alright? Overdoing it might blow in your faces.” Junmyeon warns.

Fuck the bet, Baekhyun thinks, he’ll pay for Jongdae’s meals for the rest of the year after this. This, right now, is promising to be a goldmine. 

He crosses the threshold, exits another closet just like hers, and finds himself inside the adjacent apartment.

“Baekhyun?” Sehun calls out. He crawls out of the closet and looking around in awe. “Wow. She’s definitely wacky.”

“Kind of” Baekhyun laughs airily, making his way inside and turning on the lights on.

It’s the exact same layout as hers, only mirrored, absent of any furniture other than a desk and a simple chair. It feels more spacious like this, and the temperature is not warm, nor cold, just at the right spot to feel comfortable. 

But there's a wall, and things take another turn. Sehun and Baekhung stop and take it in.

“Not kind of, totally wacky. Something is seriously wrong with her.”

“She got it from her dad.”

“Why? What’s going on?” Kyungsoo asks like he fears they'll say they found human bones.

“I’ll send you pictures in a bit,” Baekhyun assures, attention sucked in.

Now standing in the middle of what should be the living room, the grin slowly relaxes to a curious, careful little smile.

Just what have you been up to, huh?

“Wait, hyung, how’d you know she’d have something like this?”

271111 - Eleven years ago

She called his name and said,

“There’s something I want to show you,”

Baekhyun gave up on the Spiderman-themed decorations. The guys would arrive in about half an hour with drinks, food, and cake for Chanyeol's 19th birthday party, just before the rest of the people they invited, and if Minseok made it, he'd absolutely fix and organize everything to his meticulous standards.

So he jumped from the chair, dusted his hands, and followed her into the backroom.

There was a time, when they were kids, when he envied her so much he sometimes questioned their friendship.

How could he not? Her father owned an Arcade, and that alone gave her a 1% kind of privilege over all the kids at school. Mr. Kang was probably the coolest adult he knew. Everyone liked him at school; he was the teacher that let people hang out in his office and gave free coding lessons on the weekends.

To sum it up, Rina always had it good. She inherited his smart genes, so she didn't have to work herself to the bone to get into a good school, and even if she failed academically, she'd definitely inherit Arcadia.

Now, as a 19-year-old and as a part-time worker for her father's Arcade, Baekhyun had started to feel a hint of pity for her.

It began when she brought up her suspicion about her father hiding something—a family on the side, a shady job, gambling addiction. Chanyeol and Jongdae dismissed her worries and called her paranoid.

And honestly, Baekhyun kind of agreed with them, he just wasn’t that upfront about it. Eventually Rina moved on, started dating some flower boy that was way more into her than she was for him, got her hair done, and that was it. 

But late afternoon, when he was getting rid of paperwork from months back and had nothing better to do, curiosity and boredom got the better of him. He sat down and paid attention to the numbers.

Things didn’t add up.

Arcadia was barely making any profit, sometimes not even enough to cover his salary. Granted, Mr. Kang had inherited the building, so he didn’t have to worry about rent. The electricity bill, the water bill, and maintenance costs were consistently covered. Baekhyun had no idea how much being a math teacher paid, but he had a feeling that it wasn’t nearly enough to get Mr. Kang out of the red.

That was two months ago, and Rina didn’t have much of a reaction when he mentioned it, so that was that. Assuming that she’d moved on for good, it didn't cross his mind until pay day came and Mr. Kang acted as relaxed as always.

It definitely didn't come up as he followed her into the dreaded utility closet where they had once encountered the biggest, fattest spider ever.

Then, she opened the wall right inside the closet.

A door. Where he never knew there was one. Because it was a wall. And walls usually don’t open or have hidden hinges like that. 

But this one did.

Hesitating but kind of curious, he followed her down a dimly lit set of stairs, his hands trailing along the wall.

There was always something about stairs when you don’t know where they lead you. Fear pulled at his gut. 

“Say rinrin...” he began, voice wobbly.

“Mhm?” she responded, her unbothered tone added to his unease.

“This seems kind of unsafe, don’t you think?”

“You’re good, don’t worry,”

That didn't reassure him much, but being Rina, how bad could it be?

Before he could play off his concern with a joke, cold lights blinded him. The peeling paint on the walls and outdated vinyl floors gave the basement an eerie feel. A chill started to get to him, this room wasn’t heated. 

Not that they could afford that anyway.

Rina waited for him at the bottom, red beanie on top of her head, washed-out strands of blue highlights coming down her shoulders.

“Dude.”

“Alright, I’m going. You kind of look like a zombie flick character in this lighting, by the way. Like you just got bitten, but people just can’t tell yet.”

The basement sprawled out before them, larger than any basement Baekhyun had seen. Endless pipelines crisscrossed the ceiling, and despite the layers of dust, it looked and smelled relatively clean.

It really was cold as fuck.

The was a desk in the middle of the room, with a chair he recognized—a high-end, back-friendly model. Crazy expensive. 

But that wasn't it. Several empty server racks lined the back. Baekhyun had never seen that many in his life.

“Wow.”

“Right?”

On the desk were two quad monitor mounts, a keyboard and mouse. Everything covered in a light layer of dust.

“I looked through the paperwork the other night,” she said, watching him curiously hit some keys. “I found blueprints. They didn't include this, but the utility plans mentioned a basement.”

He counted up to fifteen rack cabinets around them, all empty except for one, tucked away in the corner.

“You’re the only person who knows about this,”

His head whipped in her direction. 

He felt kind of proud first, knowing that he’d been the first person someone trusts with something. She had Kyungsoo, Minhee, Minseok, and now her lovesick boyfriend. Chanyeol and Junmyeon as well. But she chose him. 

But then it settled on him. She’d just put the responsibility of being the only other person to know about this place.

She’d been right all along. 

Mr. Kang was hiding something, and it all led down to this basement. Baekhyun knew it looking at the cluster of servers. It just had to.

081222 - 11:30 pm

Sehun is, once again, going through her personal belongings. So far he’s found a loaded 22 under the bed, a brand new set of throwing knives wrapped like a Christmas gift inside her closet, and a hideous khaki jacket with tangled up faux fur on the lapel and cuffs.

“Why is Baekhyun quiet?”

Baekhyun’s sure taking his sweet time back in the eerie mirrored apartment, deep in a trance induced by all the information on the wall-sized bulletin board.

Sehun took a look at his eyes, realized that he wasn’t even listening to him, and decided to give the guy some alone time.

Everyone’s emotional these days.

Earlier today, Baekhyun told him that things could ultimately fall into his and Jongin’s hands, seeing that they're the only members of the team not compromised by personal involvement. He didn’t think much of it then, now it looks like he might've been right.

“He’s busy.” he mumbles, eyeing the small desk just opposite her bed. He has to bend his back to avoid hitting his head on the ceiling, his neck is starting to strain.

Stationery junkie. Explains the bulletin wall. She must take her Pinterest boards extra seriously.

Junmyeon is not happy with the lack of explanation. “Doing what? Why is he still in the closet?”

Chanyeol cuts in. “I’m not gonna make a joke out of that sentence. But I could, if I was in the mood. I’m just not.”

“He found a hidden door inside the entryway closet, it’s connected to the other apartment. She has the creepiest bulletin wall. She has pictures, documents, maps. Nothing related to Lee Chungjae, I think.”

Whatever intel she has in there, it looks like years' worth of work. 

Sehun is more concerned about how a journalist can afford double rent in this economy and how she got a secret security door installed without the building owner finding out and getting a hefty lawsuit.

He's kind of impressed..

Chanyeol sighs. “She has a fucking death wish.”

“No. She has a job.”

“Oh. That's definitely not a work thing, that shit is personal. Stalker levels of information. And she definitely doesn’t want anyone getting their hands on it.”

He would've approached it differently—nothing as flashy as a whole wall filled up with evidence. But he respects her for staying on the analog side of things.

If there's something they know in their line of work, is that digital means vulnerability.

But still, it took Baekhyun less than an hour to find his way in there, perhaps even less time than it would've taken him to find it if she stored everything in a bulletproof server.

All the effort, surely a few paychecks of investment, all for someone to go through that door and just find hard evidence on everything.

“Guys, this is gonna be awkward,” he says, pausing before further investigating her pink skincare mini-fridge. “But she’s got– uh, a fuckton of downers in here.” 

He’s seen some shit in his own time, but nothing like this. Several crystal bottles neatly lined up next to her toner pads and chemical exfoliator.

“Ok,” Junmyeon says, very carefully. “What– what kind?”

“Isoflurane.”

"That's not even a thing. You just made that up."

“You're joking.”

“Isn’t that... anesthesia?” Jongdae asks, but it looks like he already knows the answer.

"Anesthesia!?"

Sehun would love to know how she gets her hands on it. Few substances are as meticulously handled as anesthetics. 

He holds a bottle in his gloved hand and reads the label. If he remembers correctly, isoflurane vaporizes at room temperature, so it makes sense that she keeps them here. Inside a skincare fridge, though? Who even thinks of that?

But she sleeps with a 22 under her, so there’s that. Absolutely fucking wacky.

“But she doesn’t look– you know? She seems healthy. Yixing says she looks great.” Kyungsoo argues, sounding really against the notion that she might be using. “It doesn’t make sense.”

“There’s something called high-functioning addiction.” Chanyeol counters.

“I know that. But it doesn’t make sense.” 

Sehun agrees.

We’re missing something here.

Frustrated, he moves on to a plastic storage box under her desk. The first thing he finds, much to his surprise, is a bunch of packaged gas masks.

She’s meticulous. She carefully set up the door and the wall at other apartment. But Baekhyun found it. Easily. Like it was child’s play.

There’s a package underneath the gas masks. Blue filter replacements. Enough of them to make him stop in his tracks and his stomach drop.

He recognizes this grade. They’re made specifically for toxic fumes and chemical substances.

He slams his head against the ceiling.

“Fuck!”

“Sehun?” 

Sehun rips the plastic with his teeth, hastily puts a mask on. And runs down the narrow stairs.

“It’s a setup.”

He runs down the corridor. 

Inside the closet.

Pushes the door. Enters the mirrored apartment.

And there’s Baekhyun, sprawled on the floor, motionless.

Unconscious.

081322 - 01:45 am 

They’re usually better than this.

As in, most days in this job don’t end up with two people in the emergency room, and someone donating blood.

Turns out he has the same blood type as Miss Nut Nut. 

The night came to an end in a blur, and then things slowed down to an almost unbearable pace. Thankfully Dr. Jangmi picked up Junmyeon’s call immediately and made sure Baekhyun and the girl –who got in the way of a bullet, successfully this time– both had the best attention. As soon as possible.

Naturally, and thanks to the fact that they knew what substance he was on, Baekhyun gets discharged first, within hours.

He looks like he’s seen better days, pale skin, dry lips, IV drip next to him as Jongdae wheels him inside the private waiting room. Still, he flashes a boxy grin, rolling his eyes at the different looks of concern he gets.

“Wait, listen– it wasn’t that bad. I think I could be a drug addict in another life.”

Some find that funny, some don’t. Overall, everyone’s relieved to see that he feels fine enough to joke around.

“How’s she?”

“Still in surgery,” Kyungsoo says, holding an empty cup of coffee between his hands. 

It’s been a while since they’re all in the same room at the same time. There’s always more than one person missing, even when they go out for a meal and drinks at night. Usually, it’s Jongdae and Minseok, sometimes it’s Yixing.

“Is it bad?”

Jongin blinks down at the floor, fresh out of the shower, with a fresh set of clothes on. His whole shirt and lap were soaked in blood. Through and through. Sehun took a look at him and let him know that he would kill it in any Japanese horror movie, and congratulated him for surviving his interaction with Miss Saw.

“She lost a lot of blood, but they have it under control. They’re fixing up an artery right now.”

Minseok walks in, tie undone, bags under his eyes, a cloud of tobacco around him. He closes the door behind him and nods at Baekhyun, coming to rest a hand on his shoulder.

Jongdae offers to get another batch of coffee.

“You alright?” 

“A little drowsy, but it’s cool.” he fixes his throat. “It’s like waking up from the best worst nap ever. Uh– she knows, by the way.”

Minseok’s fingers running through his hair still, Baekhyun fears for a moment that his fist will close. His scalp is too sensitive.

“I’m sorry, what was that?”

“Jongdae, be a sweetheart and get me some water, please. I’m still,” he grabs the handles of the wheelchair, ignoring the awaiting eyes on him. “figuring this thing out.”

“What does she know?”

Jongdae forgets about the coffee and gets him a bottle from the fridge.

"For fucks sake, Baekhyun."

He holds a finger up, taking short sips and making sure to wet his lips. Kyungsoo stands up and swiftly grabs the bottle from his hands.

“Talk.”

“That is incredibly rude, I almost died tonight.”

“And you still can. Start talking.”

“Ok. Alright. Look, she doesn’t know know, but she’s… well on her way there.”

All eyes are on him, as if waiting for the punch line to drop, or for him to start laughing and tell them how bad they fell for it. 

Junmyeon’s careful blink means he knows there is no such thing as a joke going on at the moment. “What are you saying right now?” 

“She knows about High Tide. She doesn’t know know about the Arcadia Initiative, but she’s… I don’t think she’s that far off. Oh, and there was... something called Project Selene." 

“Is it ok to talk about this here?” Sehun asks, side-eyeing Jongin, and finds that his face is contorted in a strange grimace. 

Junmyeon stands from his seat, running both hands through his hair, sounding breathless. “How’s that even possible?”

“She talked to Krystal, they met at some point. She must’ve been one of her sources.”

Sehun wonders if his ears are deceiving him. “What?” 

“I’m sure of it. She saw my tattoo and mentioned a friend who had one just like it. Red, back of her neck. It had to be Krystal.”

Chanyeol’s voice is hoarse and quiet. His hands hang between his thighs, a grimace wrinkling his face.

“That’d be shitty, wouldn’t it?”

“What do you mean?”

“After Mr. Kang... you know. She was right about him from the start.” he chuckles humorlessly “And now when she’s close to finding the truth, if she-- if she doesn’t make it--”

Baekhyun cuts him off.  “That’s fucked up, man.”

“I know. I’m sorry. I was angry and I got distracted. This wouldn’t have happened if didn’t stall.”

“It’s not your fault.” Kyungsoo protests, put off by the fact that he’s considering such a thing, looking around for backup. 

“We all made the call. I could’ve stepped up, talked to her and got her out of the city for a while, and we could’ve avoided this.” Yixing follows, putting his hand on Chanyeol's shoulder. “So don’t blame yourself, Chanyeol. We’ve had a rough night, but she’s stubborn. She’ll pull through. Dr. Jangmi's helped us out of worse before.”

“It was a delicate situation, we all knew there was an added risk.” Minseok's tone is unreadable. But there’s nothing new about that.

“You’re right.” Yixing nods. “We’ll discuss what we’ll do about... everything Baekhyun found in its due time, once she recovers. And we’re all cool-headed.”

“Yeah. Let’s just... deal with this later.” Junmyeon says. There’s a haggard look on his face, but his bloodshot eyes keep staring at a specific spot on the floor, probably already thinking of the implications of this revelation, of the consequences, and the possible moves to make.

Jongin and Sehun share a look. The tension has risen again, as it has several times this week when the subject comes up. Every single time it feels like an argument is imminent and shit will hit the fan, though it never quite gets there. 

And it only adds up for the next time.

“What’s there to discuss?” Minseok asks in a tone that leaves no space for answers, regarding Junmyeon and Yixing with a coldness in his expression that takes Sehun by surprise. "Isn't it obvious?"

His tired expression from before and heavy eyelids have sharpened to a stern mask they’ve seen only a few times since he met him. It’s not usual that Minseok talks like the eldest, so when he does, the room stills and holds its breath.

“The second she learns the truth this will make it to The Chronicle’s front page. When that happens, this all goes down, we go down, and she goes down. They won’t be this sloppy.”

Junmyeon looks away, jaw clenched. Chanyeol keeps his eyes on the floor. Jongdae looks out of the window at the view from Kyunkook Hospital. It started to rain a few minutes ago, and he can’t tell if the timing is terrible or soothing. 

“She's not a risk we can afford to take.”

Baekhyun looks down at the diluted blood filling up the drip chamber in his hand.

Only Yixing looks directly at Minseok while he’s speaking. His expression gives away nothing.

“Jung Jiah can never know the truth. She got close, and that’ll be it. We'll make sure of it.”

#exo fanfiction #exo fanfic #exo x reader #exo scenarios #exo angst #baekhyun fanfiction #sehun fanfiction #xiumin fanfiction #yixing fanfiction #chanyeol fanfiction #jongdae fanfiction #jongin fanfiction #junmyeon fanfiction #kyungsoo fanfiction

[thotsforvillainrights]

Heyyyy 👏

It's my fellow Skeptic simp!! Loveeee 💻 🤨

I have a request if you don't mind 👉👈

Headcanons for Skeptic 🙏🤌

How would he be with getting married and how would the honeymoon bee 👀

You don't need to rush at all! 💕

Please stay safe and healthy and have a wonderful day/night ❤️

(The chance to write for Skeptic is like getting a package delivered in the mail way before the estimated delivery date: GOOD)

[SMUT IMPLIED BTW]

~Skeptic’s Marriage and the Honeymoon~

headcanon|scenario|imagine|match-up

~Marriage~

-You two likely announce your marriage together in front of the others. Tomoyasu is acting like he doesn’t care of that he’s annoyed by their “oooo’s and ahhhh’s” but you can clearly see the smile pulling up in the corner of his mouth. He’s proud and excited himself that you’d ever agree to marry someone like him. Hell, he was proud the day you agreed to date him! (You should’ve seen the proposal...He just walked into the bedroom and tossed the box at you barely missing your head. “Let’s get married.” Acting all nonchalant like he wasn’t panicking in the parking lot of the jewelry shop earlier about the possibility of you saying no to him) It’s almost too difficult to answer the slew of questions flying your way from both Chitose and Hanabata. 

-It hasn’t even been a full 2 days before you find yourself out dress/tux/outfit shopping with those two. Oh and don’t think ReDestro and Geten aren’t supportive just because they’re on the sidelines. Rikiya is busy trying to convince Skeptic to let him fund the ENTIRE event as a wedding gift, and Geten is waiting at ReDestro’s feet for any instruction to help his grand commander. I’m sure you already know who donated those ice sculptures at the reception (and no, it was not the catering company). Tomoyasu eventually settled on letting Rikiya pay the venue as a gift. Anymore than that and the man would feel uncomfortable making his commander pay like that. Chitose and Hanabata basically sprung to pay for the clothing. No matter how hard Skeptic and you tried to stop them, they were already on top of it. In all honesty, you two didn’t have to pay for anything except for the catering. That was only because Skeptic was able to beat Chitose to the phone to book them! Anyway, the wedding was a lovely event. 

-There were plenty of people attending from Detnerat, Feel Good, as well as family, friends, liberation army members, and a few from the others (Chitose and Hanabata’s) companies. It was extremely rare that you EVER saw Skeptic cry. On this day he cried so hard that his vows came out all choked up. You were sure him and ReDestro were in some sort of secret crying competition lol. 

~Honeymoon~

Shortly after leaving the reception, the two of you jetted back home to take a quick nap and finish up packing before heading out on your honeymoon. The others would be in charge of putting all your wedding presents in your house while you were both gone so there was no need to worry there! All you needed to focus on at the moment was dealing with Tomoyasu’s road rage and wondering when was the next time you could stop and get something to eat. Seriously...you’ve switched to the driver’s side a few times during the trip since he could sometimes be unbearable when in a car for an extended period of time. He’d already cursed out three drivers and flipped off two others. On top of that, he REFUSED to check the directions claiming that he’s researched enough and knew how to get to the hotel just fine...he didn’t by the way. This (and the constant stopping on your behalf for breaks) had added an extra 2 hours onto the trip time. You didn’t make it to the hotel until nearly midnight! It was fine because the mood dramatically shifted once you parked and admired the grand beauty of the hotel and the tourist city surrounding you two. You’d checked in, had a lovely shower, and got the absolute shit fucked out of you *ahem...I mean consummated the marriage or whatever* 

-By the next morning you were both recharged and ready to see some sights! The first thing you did was check out a local aquarium. It was fun seeing the various fish and learning a few facts here and there. And sure, maybe it was a little childish waiting in line for the Penguin playhouse but who gives a shit? It’s your honeymoon, enjoy it! Next the two of you climbed the side of a mountain for a hike...something Skeptic had already wanted to quit considering he was way too hot and sweaty for it by now. You didn’t even make it to the waterfall tucked away in the woods! “Awwww, but Tomo!” He grunted at you and grabbed your hand as he gently pulled you alongside him and back down the mountainside. “Let’s go, my hair is getting nasty and I’m about to pass out. I’ll show you the damn waterfall over the satellite footage.” 

-The course of the next few days was filled with exploring different attractions (mirror mases and wax museums and more), with a side of eating half your weight in street foods. On top of that, Skeptic let you go a little wild with the souvenir budget as long as you didn’t buy more than you could take back with you in the car. When the last day came along, neither of you wanted to return back to your normal lives but you eventually had to come to terms with just relaxing every single day going out the window lol. 

-Oh and of course he carried you through the front door when you made it back home. Something something traditional about the threshold or whatever. Congrats on making it back home safe newlyweds! Now you get to focus on unwrapping and putting away a shit ton of wedding presents...hurrah!     

#took inspo for this from my own honeymoon this year #man did we eat a LOT of food lol #the mountain hike nearly killed out out of shape asses #anyway im rambling #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #tomoyasu chikazoku #skeptic bnha #mla #meta liberation army

[stilldancewithyou]

heyy I've just read, well I actually have read a lot of your analysis about the summer I turned pretty and they are honestly so good, I'm in love with them. Anyway, I've just read the one about how Belly feels about sex and how it is played in the books and I must say you're so right about it, it is so necessary to show representation of this, I have always felt the same way as her about it, so it's really something to see this and and as you say it's so importnt to tell girls that it's okay to be like Belly (and as you say the media doesn't seem interested anymore in telling this experiences or when they do it's more treated as an embarassing thing or as you being a prude and a loser so yeah same thoughts as you on that matter) love your blog btw 🥰​

aww thank you so much, you're too kind!

I'm so glad I'm not the only one who feels this way! One of the things about the show that I disliked the most was how it covered this topic but to be fair they didn't really cover it. First of all most of the girls besides Nicole are only 16! that's soo young. they're practically babies still.

The scene after the volleyball tournament, before the skinny dipping scene really annoyed me. I hated how every single girl made Belly feel so humiliated and awful about the fact that she had never done anything. It just felt kinda cringey to watch cause they could clearly tell she was uncomfortable and it made me feel secondhand embarrassment for her. At that point I was like these girls are bitch ass hoes! I don't like them anymore! the deb scene is for sheep! and then of course when they left them naked and alone out there in the dark it just confirmed that. I really appreciated that Taylor noticed how Belly was feeling and like stood up for her though. Idk the whole scene was just kinda weird to me. I know it was supposed to be reminiscent of the scene in the 3rd book when Belly is at college and she plays "never have I ever" with her college friends but I almost wished they had left it out. and then the fact that Belly's big car make out scene with Jeremiah happens almost directly after this also bothered me because I couldn't even enjoy the moment between them cause I was too busy cringing. like the fact that she's clearly feeling bad about being inexperienced and the girls made her feel like she needs to do stuff and now she's all over Jere...I couldn't properly enjoy it. I know those scenes happened in that order for a reason and all but I just...the way things happened there just had me:

I just hope in season 2/3 they show some open and honest conversations between her and both guys about it. Netflix fucked it up in TATBILB so I'm really hoping Jenny Han will let TSITP unfold the way the book does. And let's be honest. if belly fucks both brothers it will really not be a good look for her at all. And I really believe focusing on the emotional connections is what made the book so effective and is what made Belly and Conrad's dynamic so effective. Don't get me wrong, I love seeing the physical connection scenes too. But building up the emotional connection and anticipation and makes the physical parts hit sooo much better.

The representation is so important for young girls, to show Belly the way book Belly is, and how sex is such a big deal to her, and also to show her having healthy conversations with the boys about it too and how they understand how she feels and respect it! Young girls really need to see it. there wasn't even any of that when I was sixteen in shows. Idk why we have to be out here sexualizing 16 year olds all the time in this society but here we are.

#tsitp #tsitp spoilers #the summer i turned pretty #belly conklin #jeremiah fisher #conrad fisher #it's like 1 am and i'm pretty sure my thoughts have stopped making sense and this came out kinda aggressive lol

[michaels-office-hours]

Family talks about Christianity sometimes, and I’m actually a pretty new one myself… so if that makes you uncomfortable? Feel free to keep scrolling/unfollow/block. I don’t mind.

But anyway, they talk about it sometimes… and I can’t- really tell them I’m here? This is Mike talking btw. They think OSDD is kinda silly or something to get rid of or idk… but yeah. I have to mask as Jewels at home, I’m pretty good at it? But that’s why I like this blog. Let’s me be myself. But anyway, I’d actually kinda like to- talk about it? Since Jewels has grown up as Christian, and Olivia was pretty young when she split off… so she’s also pretty used to it. And is more into it than Jewels so skhvsjhvsjh. But yeah. I’m new to this? Would like pointers maybe? But that’d out me… in seconds. Would rather not.

Anyway, talking about C.S. Lewis’s “The Problem With X” essay thingy. Idk what it’s called. And yeah there’s a link there in case you’re interested, to the video we watched. C.S. Lewis is one of my favorite authors, he goes deep. Plus he wrote the Screw Tape Letters, and that book is amazing. Freaky, but amazing.

I keep getting sidetracked, ahem. In that video they talk about there’s probably people in your life you have issue with. X Lewis labeled them. You know who they are, annoying parents, nagging grandparents, a neighbor whose too nosy or loud, a sibling whose just rude? Everyone has an X. I’d be surprised if you didn’t.

But the main kicker in the video, was that you’re an X too. To God? Everyone is. He sees them all, and He has a plan. Do we follow that plan? No. Does He stop us? No. Because He wants us to love Him by our own will. He wants it to be real, like His love for us is.

So if God has to deal with all these X’s, but doesn’t change them, what are we to do with them? The same, we can do nothing. Think about it, you can raise hell fire and go up against X. But think about X for a minute, X is a brick wall, aren’t they? You’ve probably had it out with them in the past. All that did was make everyone mad, and your life miserable.

So what we do, is focus on the X we can control. Ourselves. Better ourselves (with God’s help usually, but I do understand if others are reading this. Just try to make a better you, whatever that is) and maybe by example, X will stop being so bad.

Now… here comes my part in this. Jewels bent over backwards, and jumped through hoops. She tried her damnedest to be the best she could for her X’s. Guess why I’m here. Now, guess why I’m typing this? X is still there. Just as stoic in their harshness as ever, maybe worse! And what does she have to show? A hero complex and an inability to see where to draw the line between her own needs, and the wants of those around her. I have that too unfortunately… since I came from that situation.

But that isn’t what C.S. Lewis was suggesting at all. Not at all. And in fact, this is the reason I consider myself a new Christian, because before I didn’t see myself as “good enough” before. Yes, you’re supposed to live an example and try to better yourself. Yes, you can try to fight X, but we all know the kind of X I talking about, there’s no talking to them. So I doubt it will work. But what God doesn’t want you to do, is to change because of X. Don’t make you’re whole personality, trying to please them, or be the best person they want. You’ll never make it.

God wants you to be His child. And guess what? He loves you right now. I don’t give a damn about what X is telling you. “Oh you didn’t take out the garage, you’re horrible” “I’m not being that loud, you’re just rude” “you never spend time with me, you must hate this family” wrong wrong wrong. If X can’t see it? On them. Keep trying to be a good example. But I beg you, know that God loves you now. Right now. For existing. For breathing. He’d love it if you’d try to be a better person! And He’s very proud when you do try. Even when you fail, you tried. And btw? For non-Christians reading this? If you don’t believe in God, or we don’t share one, or whatever the circumstances? I’m proud of you. M’kay? You’re trying. Good on you for that. You’re trying, and still existing in a world of X’s. And man alive I know how hard that is, but you’re doing it. And thank you. Genuinely thank you.

Please, if you’re can. If you didn’t read any of this? Just try to not put too much of a burden on others. Because they’re trying more than you’d think. And know that, while you try? There’s always someone out there loving you for it. You’re an amazing example, and role model, and person in general. And thank you. You can do this. Whoever is in your way? I hope they’ll see the truth soon.

I’m gonna go do something else now. White screen is making the migraine I had before this start to scream skhvsjhvsjg. Good luck guys. You got this. 🫰🏻

#🔥 #christianity #animatronic vent alert

[phoenixyfriend]

When Obi-Wan gets to AotC, there's also about two dozen Anakin clones on-site. They're all girls because... IDK Anakin is trans. They have a hive mind and are developmentally a few years younger than Anakin himself.

It's incredibly unsettling to Obi-Wan.

It's almost definitely a "fuck with Anakin's already fragile mental health" ploy by Palpatine, along with a "what if Jedi Black Widows, for me, a Sith Lord. Wouldn't that be neat? That would be neat."

Anakin is torn between "this freaks me out" and "GANG OF BABY SISTERS LET'S GOOOOOOO."

(I just finished reading Like Real People Do by glimmerglanger, so this is definitely inspired by that and the obligatory 'lay back in bed and daydream variations on plot points of that fic you just really enjoyed,' and also a little by Same Heart, Same Blood by loosingletters.)

They're physically like 14-16 on average, and Anakin's vibrating out of his skin with a million conflicting emotions, but when he tells Padme she's just like "oh, you have a handmaiden gang!"

I told this to @willowcrowned and she suggested:

Once Anakin decides to repress the part of him that’s weirded out and just regard them as baby sisters he gets. A little strange about it The first time one of them dies he may or may not slaughter every person he can [in response to Padme's comment] Anakin starts worrying that he needs to get them cool matching outfits

I also chatted about it with @firebirdeternal and they said:

Gang of Unsettling Smol Siblings is exactly the Karma that Anakin deserves

Do you think the Clones have a kind of Collective Name that they use at first that eventually just kind of morphs into a new last name? Skysisters or something? Like Palpatine was trying to be clever and name them like the Nightsisters.

I initially went with "functionally one person" hive-mind but I'm torn.

I think maybe they're BASICALLY one person on Kamino but drift into Separate Consciousness once they're far enough apart physically that their minds don't blend from proximity anymore.

Then they start Dating (like half of them are dating Fett clones because they grew up with these dudes, it's like childhood friends romance), and Anakin loses his mind about Protecting Them and They're Too Young.

Padme: You're nineteen and we just got married, they can date. Anakin: THEY'RE EIGHT. Padme: And the Fett clones are ten and dying for us in the field. Get them rights before you panic about their love lives.

Firebird:

it could be worse, one of them could imprint on Obi-Wan. "Anakin I promise I won't yell at you for the next five stupid things you do if you can figure out a way to stop this baby from having a crush on me" (I like the idea of Obi-wan bargaining not with "I won't be mad at you ever" because they Both Know That's Not True, and instead haggling with specific allowances. Like he's handing out Stupidity Coupons)

Please imagine Mace and Obi-Wan's personal responses to the idea of suddenly having to deal with not one, not two, but OVER TWENTY SKYWALKERS.

Plo is delighted to take one off their hands.

So is Yoda.

Willow:

Mace is like. okay suicide isn’t the Jedi way but on the other hand. i physically cannot deal with this Yoda: a skywalker, you say? one who is tall enough to reach the top shelf, you say? such a skywalker, bring me

Anakin would be given at least one because fuck you, suffer with us, but he's still a padawan so Ugh, fine, no.

I want to say one stays on Coruscant to hang out with the Guard, and ends up half-adopted by Padme. She keeps dressing up the Aniclone left with her in handmaiden outfits and sending selfies to Anakin.

"Hanging out with the little SiL!"

Anakin has so many issues about WHEN his genetic material was acquired.

And there's some confusion from the Fett clones about how much of a hive mind is normal for Jedi. They are confused that the answer is basically none, and "this is WHY nobody clones a Jedi"

ONE OF THEM STEALS BOBA FROM THE ARENA ON GEONOSIS.

Firebird:

"I have followed in our progenitor's footsteps and acquired a sibling." holds up a struggling Boba "He bites."

Willow:

Ooooo okay so if they have a sort of hive mind then they probably don’t have names other than their designations on Kamino right BUT When they SEPARATE The one that picks Boba up on Geonosis gets a name specifically for that. Okay what if the one Padmé picks up gets some variant on ‘pretty’ because she’s always being dressed up BELLE Maybe Yoda’s Ani has a name that means thief? Because obviously Yoda is using Anakin to steal sweets

So, to make the timeline work...

I don't think anyone would give Anakin one of his sisters until after he's knighted at least.

So obviously when they're doing initial placements none of the sisters go to him or Obi-Wan.

Once he's knighted, of course they're already all placed with someone, and Anakin instead gets Ahsoka. He loves Ahsoka. She is also a little sister. He said so.

At some point afterwards, one of the sisters is left without a place because the Master that was in charge of her died in the field battle.

That sister then gets placed with Obi-Wan, because he's already mostly-successfully raised one Skywalker, so he can do it again.

Anakin gets to hang out with her basically all the time.

Ahsoka is very very jealous of this girl stealing Anakin's attention.

Anakin is oblivious to the rivalry.

He asks Barriss to look after them while he's discussing Adult War Things with Luminara and Obi-Wan, and Barriss gets an eye into This Mess, which is quickly colored by Ahsoka growing a puppy crush on the lovely Miss Offee herself.

Firebird:

Ahsoka: Ah yes, my nemesis. Anisister: Ah yes, my new older sister whom I want to impress so bad.

"I will impress her by being Stoic and Competent" "Oh my god she must think she's so much better than me what a bitch"

Anakin is oblivious to most things to be fair Anakin: Laser focused precision fighting machine who can read the tiniest body movements and predict your moves seconds in advance, who also cannot understand even the most basic social nuance. I was originally writing this as to Dunk on Anakin but then I made myself sad, because none of those things are really his fault.

So you know that post about like, Sasuke and Brooding, specifically in the context of "Brooding" as it's used to refer to Nesting Chickens? Grouchy and protective and sitting on a tennis ball trying to hatch it because they're just. "These are my Babies." Anakin Broods. Baby sisters. Must protecc. "I'm actually fine and extremely deadly in combat." "MUST PROTECT."

Bad Guy: [catches Ahsoka in a Trap] Aniclone: Must rescue sister! Aniclone: [fights, is not winning fight, gets ouched] Ahsoka tearing her way out of Trap: I lived bitch. Also: stay the fuck away from her. [murders so hard]

Ahsoka catches the Protective Older Sib feels by the traditional method: "Hey, only I'm allowed to be mean to them."

Willow:

Oh Anakin has no clue what’s going on. He walks in on Ahsoka glaring at the Ani and is like!!! Little sisters!!! Bonding!!! When Ahsoka was about three seconds away from tossing her out of the airlock. Ahsoka mistakenly assumes that Barriss has a crush on the Ani, and gets even MORE jealous.

Obi-Wan is like oh god. I can’t take care of an Anakin going through puberty again. He’s great with periods and other stuff because he read about a billion books. He is TERRIBLE with everything else, as he was the first time.

Barriss is like???? YOU'RE BOTH CHILDREN, PLEASE CALM DOWN, I HAVE ZERO INTEREST IN DATING ANYONE, LET ALONE SOMEONE YOUR AGE.

IDK how old Obi-Wan's Aniclone is, probably physically the same age as Ahsoka?

Per @atagotiak on discord:

Also something something, similarities btw Anakin and Obi-Wan where like. "Am I a parent? That seems uncomfortable, I'm too young to be a dad to a kid this age, I mean I'm cool with being a mentor/caretaker but..."

Obi-Wan can't even sidestep parenthood this time.

"Is Anakin basically your dad?" "Uhhhhhh" [Muffled discussion] "So Obi-Wan is your dad." "Okay!" "WAIT NO I DIDN'T AGREE TO THIS"

Ahsoka: She's stealing my brother, that BITCH. Obi-Wan's Aniclone: new sister new sister new sister gotta make a good impression

Firebird:

I feel like the Sister Squad would make very effective interstellar espionage agents Even like, kind of by accident. They just get encouraged to branch out in their interests and figure out what they want to do with their lives and end up all over the dang place, and since they're all pretty dang competent they tend to gravitate towards Important Positions wherever they end up. Except for one sister who just retires to raise Space Sheep.

I like that in this AU Palpatine is just like "I will create an army of Loyal Murderers who will obey my every whim and also be a big psychological lever on my Other Pet Murderer," and then they all just Baby Duckling imprint on the first Jedi to be nice to them instead and he has to just be like "Wait no not like that."

AND one of them Steals Boba

I want Obi-Wan's Aniclone to start dating Fives. All the sisters judge her for it, because he's a Goof. A very competent, ARC Trooper goof! But a goof.

Not as goofy as Anakin, though.

Firebird:

Who expects a clone of Anakin Skywalker to not make questionable lifelong romantic choices impulsively?

#Anakin Skywalker #Ahsoka Tano #Obi Wan Kenobi #Disaster Lineage #Sheev Palpatine #Skeevy Sheev #cloning #Yoda #Mace Windu #Skysisters AU #trans anakin skywalker #Phoenix Posts #hive mind #Padme Amidala #Anidala

[beels-burger-babe]

Hi! I saw that requests are open, if it's not a problem could i request Satan reacting to MC coming to him with new books every time they hang out because they want him to read them out loud since they have a short attention span? Like, Satan would be reading said book while MC is drawing or doing something else.

I have adhd and reading books that are not digital is a nightmare for me, so him reading out loud would be pretty relaxing.

Btw it's up to you if you wanna do headcanons or a oneshot!

ABSOLUTELY!!! So this is actually my first request and I'm super excited because as someone who also has ADHD I can totally relate! I hope you like it!

Too Still, Too Quiet

GN!MC with ADHD Summary: Satan notices that MC seems to have a hard time hanging out with him; he's determined to get to the bottom of the issue and find a solution.

After living in the House of Lamentation for nearly a year, you've grown accustomed to the many quirks that came with living with the seven Lords of the Devildom. You had gotten close to the brothers, and as they picked up on your symptoms for your ADHD, they each found their own ways of being helpful. Lucifer had always known, as it was written on your file, and made a point of sending you subtle reminders throughout the day to keep you organized and on task. He brushed it off saying that it merely prevented him from having to go after you later on if you forgot or did something incorrectly.  Mammon was no stranger to having a hard time prioritizing and staying focused and took pride in lending you some of the different tools he used to fidget with. After all, his human deserved the best, and you couldn’t get any better than using something that belonged to the great Mammon. Leviathan’s room provided a relaxing atmosphere with just enough stimulation to keep your brain satisfied enough to focus on your school work and tasks. The sounds of the aquarium provided a fantastic back ground noise, and Levi always took caution in wearing his headphones when he gamed if you were working in his room to not add to the distractions around you.  Asmodeus had a good eye for when you were growing too frustrated by the regular chaos that tended to fill the House of Lamentation and would pull you aside to his room for some self-care to help calm you down. There was nothing like a head message and face mask from Asmo as he happily gossiped about the latest drama in The Fall to help ground you.  Beelzebub, on the other hand, was great at noticing when you were starting to grow restless. In those moments, he’d not-so-subtly state that he was heading to the gym and it’d sure be nice if he had someone to join in before very obviously making eye contact with you. At first you had a hard time figuring out a good balance between a work out that satisfied Beel while also not killing you. But now the two of you easily worked with each other until you were both sweating, smiling, and happy. He also made sure to remind you to eat through out the day whenever you went to a round of hyper-fixation on something. Belphegore wasn’t particularly helpful when it came to your forgetful spells or disorganization as, being the Avatar of Sloth, he would normally encourage such behavior. Instead, he did what he did best, and helped put your wandering mind to ease whenever you were trying to sleep.  The only person, and not for a lack of trying, that you just couldn’t seem to find a flow with was Satan. 

He was too quiet and organized for you to be able to stand being around him for long periods of time. You had tried hanging out with him a couple of times, but after a few minutes of him silently reading or him explaining whichever text he was currently studying, you would grow restless and distracted.  Which brought you to your current situation.  Satan had invited you to come relax in his room with him, as the rest of his brothers were dealing with the aftermath of their most recent dilemma. It wasn’t so bad at first, some light conversation here, some banter there, but soon your mind started to wander off to the spines of the endless books around you as you pondered on what might be inside them.  “MC?”  Your attention snapped back onto Satan, who stood frowning at you. You blushed and scratched the back of your neck. “Oh, I’m sorry. I got a little distracted. What were you saying?”  Satan sighed as his frown deepened.  “I’ve noticed that tends to happen a lot with you. Not that there’s anything wrong with that!” He quickly amended raising his hands in defense. “But it seems particularly bad when you’re with me. You get quite jittery and I don’t think you’ve ever stayed in my room longer than ten minutes,” for a second his eyes almost looked sad as he looked over at you, “Is it something I’m doing? Do I make you uncomfortable?”  “No! Satan, no, it’s not you I promise!” You quickly reassured moving closer to him. “It’s just well I have a hard time staying still and focusing on things and when it gets too quiet it bothers me because then my brain is like hyper fixating on the smallest noises in the room, even though I’m supposed to be focusing on what you’re saying or my work, and it’s like, is that a page a turning or a something scratching at the door and then I start wondering about what kind of things could be in here and-”  “MC.” Satan cut off, though he didn’t seem annoyed. In fact, his eyes now gleamed with a sense of understanding. “Do you happen to have ADHD?”  “Yeah, I thought you all knew? Lucifer told all of you when I arrived right? That’s why everyone is so-” you moved your hand in a vague gesture that even you weren’t entirely sure what it was meant to symbolize.  Satan huffed and shook his head. “Lucifer did no such thing. I imagine he would’ve told us if it came to be a big enough problem. But you know him. He takes pride in being the only one to know certain things. “  You frowned and tilted your head in confusion. “But then what about the others? They’ve all been helping me out for months now.”  Satan placed a hand under his chin in thought, “They most likely took note of individual symptoms and decided to help. Belphegore, and possibly even Leviathan and Asmodeus may have put two and two together, but the rest probably think you’re just forgetful or that you’re restless,” he smiled reassuringly at you, “but that’s besides the point. Now that I know, I can help make you feel more at ease when you’re with me. What’s the main issue that you-” “It’s too quiet!” You quickly cut off, causing Satan to raise an eyebrow. “When we’re in here relaxing and you’re just reading and I’m supposed to be reading too, it’s too quiet. I try to focus on the book, but my mind keeps jumping around to other things. And I want to read all those books you’ve recommended to me, I really do, but I start feeling bored after a little while and next thing I know I jumping sentences without noticing and then I’ve gone an entire chapter with no recollection of what I’ve just read because I wasn’t really paying attention to the words at all I was just flipping pages without realizing it, so I have to go back and re-read the whole thing all over again!” You throw your hands in the air in frustration. “Is exhausting and makes me feel dumb, so I get up and do something else instead.”  Satan nodded, taking in every word carefully. “Well first of all,” you yelped as he flicked your forehead.  “Ouch! What was that for?!”  The demon smirked and crossed his arms over his chest. “For calling yourself dumb. Just because you have more difficulty with literature than others, does not mean you’re dumb. You simply require a different reading strategy than what most consider “usual”, and I believe I have a solution that would suit both of us,” you perked up at his words. “I recommended those books to you because I greatly enjoyed them myself. How about, when you’re here, you can choose a book you want to read, and I will read it out loud for you? That should help, yes?”  A light airy warmth filled your chest at just how accommodating Satan was willing to be. “But what about the books that you were reading?”  The demon shrugged, “I can always read them in my spare time.” He moved closer to take your hands into his, silently demanding your full attention. “I want to spend more time with you and get to know you better. I want you to be comfortable and be able to be yourself when you’re around me without feeling stressed. This is honestly the least I could do for you, MC.”  Blushed rushed to your cheeks as you felt your heart flutter in your chest. You awkwardly cleared your throat and took your hands back, rubbing them on your legs as you noted how clammy they were. “I think I-I would like that a lot” The grin on Satan’s face widened as he took one of your hands and lead you deeper into the bookshelves of his room. “Splendid! Then why don’t we get try right away? Take you pick, MC, I will be your narrator for the evening and for as long as you wish.”  ***** I hope this was something along the lines of what you were looking for! It is a little short, but I hope you like it. Thank you so much for the request, I loved it! Requests are OPEN and I would definitely love to complete some more if anyone has any ideas or prompts that they’d like me to complete. Just send in an ask and, if I feel comfortable with it, I’ll do my best to make a fic for it!

#shall we date obey me #obey me fic #OBEY ME #obey me satan #gender neutral main character #gn!mc #fanfic #fan fic #request #requests are open #b answers #🐝 answers #my writing #adhd #adhd mc #shall we date satan #soft satan #soft fic #Urgh how do I tag? #I can't remember

[ficsex]

I have recently started getting horny sometimes. I don't know what to do about this. How does one stop being horny? (I am a teenager btw)

Well, there are a couple of answers to this questions.

1. Here are literally some ways that you can stop being horny:

Distract yourself with something engaging, like a video game or cooking project, that involves your body and your brain. This will turn down your arousal as your focus will be elsewhere.

Exercise or go for a hike or do some active yoga - let your blood flowing not just to your genitals, but through your whole cardiovascular system. This will temporarily raise your cortisol levels, and then take them back down once you're finished working out and cooling off (also helpful to deal with anxiety)

Read a book or listen to a podcast - something really fascinating that you'll put all of your thoughts into.

Call or hang out with a friend that you are 0% attracted to, and let your hanging out get your mind off of it.

2. It's pretty natural to be horny as a teenager.

Your body is doing all kinds of big things: making changes, stirring the chemical soup pot, growing, etc. A lot of those things involve hormones and the neurobiological growth that's connected to sexual arousal. Being turned on is a thing that you may experiencing a lot of over the next few years (and then will probably cool down a little after all of those changes are over). You can accept that horniness is part of your life, and try some of the following things:

masturbate. give it a try, if you're not uncomfortable with the idea. get to know your body and what feels good, and maybe you'll find that being turned on can lead to some really great feeling things.

recognize that there is a time and a place to be distracted by horniness, and use the tips above to keep it to when you're at home / have free time.

do nothing about it! you don't have to masturbate / orgasm or ignore it / distract yourself. It's okay to be horny or turned on. I know that it's weird and new, but it doesn't have to change the way that you behave. You can just acknowledge "I'm pretty horny right now" and recognize that it's about as distracting as being hungry or tired, and go about your day.

Maybe spend some time thinking about why you want to stop being horny. It's understandable to be distressed by something new and weird, but it isn't necessarily a bad change, even if it's an inconvenient and distracting one.

Good luck! Being a teenager is hard!

#sex education #idk what else to tag this so it doesn't show up in anyone's smutty searches so I'm leaving it here

[literatikoo]

Pro/Con of each Rory boyfriend

Okay, I'm gonna keep this as objective as possible but each boyfriend will be criticised a fair bit. I am not tagging this post as anti-anything but if you're uncomfortable at the thought of any of these men being criticised DO NOT READ!!!

Dean- pros

Genuinely loved Rory

Got along with Rory's family

Went as Rory's escort to all her high society functions with minimal complaints

Tall

Nice hair in Season 1

Is very sweet to Rory when they first started dating

Is the only one of the three boyfriends who seems to know how a relationship works

Can keep up with the Gilmore's quirks

Tries to read big books for Rory

Dean- cons

Loved Rory to the point of infatuation

Got along so well with Lorelai that he started confiding in her about his relationship with Rory

Extremely possessive, has threatened bodily harm on two guys who Rory saw as friends

Got jealous of Harvard

Misogynistic, does not understand unusual family structures

Yells a lot

So tall that looming in shadows and being intimidating comes easy to him

Still seemed to think he had enough of a say in Rory's relationship with Jess to sucker punch Jess even though he had no idea why Rory and Jess fought

Got married to Lindsey while he loved Rory

Lied to Rory to get her to sleep with him (this is also in the grey area of consent btw)

Was not planning to end his marriage to Lindsey until she found out about the affair

Broke up with Rory twice, in public, by yelling at her

Blames her for both times, when really he just couldn't handle being inferior to her

Jess- pros

Genuinely loved (loves?) Rory

Has everything in common with Rory

Doesn’t care what anyone has to say about him or their relationship

Pushes Rory to fight for herself

Takes Luke's and Lorelai's feedback into account to be a better boyfriend

Though he didn't make the greatest impression on Emily the first time, he was ready to go back and fix it

Does not get jealous

Does not yell at Rory for being friends with guys

Instead tries to tell her that he doesn't want her to feel like she needs to lie to him or keep secrets from him

Slowly becomes friends with Lane and Hep Alien

Tries to be nicer to Lorelai because Rory asked him too

He "made sure she was okay"

Great hair

"Why did you drop out of Yale" "You should write a book"

Gets his shit together, writes a book and has a steady income by the age of 21 (is the only boyfriend to do this)

Jess- cons

Loving her was not enough for him to stay

Has some deep seated issues that stopped him from trusting anyone

Loses all impulse control when he's emotional

Kyle's bedroom (again, in the grey area of consent)

Asked Rory to go with him to New York after he left her twice

Did not take her to prom

Said "I love you" and ran away

Did NOT know how to be a boyfriend

Could be a bit pretentious

Was rude to Lorelai and Emily

Took his anger out on Rory in Keg!Max!

Didn't tell her he was leaving

Logan- pros

Genuinely loved Rory

Made an effort to get along with Lorelai that actually stuck

Gives Rory a place to stay after Paris kicks her out

Is the only one of the three boyfriends who seems to understand consent (SERIOUSLY the threshold is so low)

Gives brilliant gifts

Knows his authors and books

His and Rory's relationship lasted two years pretty steadily which is good for someone's first try at a relationship

Tries to communicate his problems with Rory

Had the entire adult relationship thing down

Was ready to change for Rory

Gave Rory new experiences such as the LDB

Knows how to have a good time

Gets along well with the Gilmores

Good at high society events

Supported most of Rory's career

Also supported Rory's... non career (aka yacht)

Logan- cons

Did not love Rory enough to support her choosing her career over their marriage

Broke up with Rory at her graduation

Cheated on Rory with his sisters entire bridal procession

Manipulative: twists Rory's words into something they aren't multiple times

Rude to people of lower social class (Marty, Jess)

Also known for getting jealous (Marty, Jess) (Though I would like to add that he was in the right about telling Lucy the truth)

Spoiled

Loses a million dollars in a business deal and then goes to LA to blow off more money

Has too much fun

Is a part of the Huntzberger dynasty

Introduced Rory to the Huntzberger dynasty

Tries to rebel against his dad by constantly flaunting his privilege

Rory forgives Logan for cheating after he jumps off a cliff in Costa Rica and severely harms himself

Supported Rory's non career (yacht)

Gatsby levels of pretentiousness

Doesn't go with Rory to SH events that matter to her (Lane's baby shower, Lane's wedding)

Still acting like a petulant child at his big age of 25

In conclusion, all three of them had a great deal of growing up to do and they all made their mistakes. But they were important for Rory's growth at that stage.

#gilmore girls #rory gilmore #logan Huntzberger #dean forester #jess mariano #lorelai gilmore #deanrory #literati #rogan #maybe a little of my bias shows hmm #this does not mean tristan or marty would've been good boyfriends either #if you have anything to add go for it <3

[hangezoeenthusiast]

Papa

Part 2 Part 3

let me know if you wanna be tagged please. this will be a series

fem!daughter!reader

word count: 1,855

person: c!schlatt, c!quackity, c!karl, c!sapnap

warnings: parents, cursing, yelling, orphans, cigars and alcohol mention (btw these are the warnings for now)

synopsis: you were loved, you were cherished, then someone left, and other people replaced that person, and you didn't like that.

-

Your biological parents threw you out of their home because they couldn't care for you. You were at least at the brink of 2 years old when this happened. They put you in a little stroller and took you to an orphanage. "Miss Jessica's Home For Orphans", it was a stupid place, but the place got you fed, and clothed.

On some fortunate day, you were going to get adopted. Quackity his name was. He came in, and asked for kids 2-6. "Those ages are easy to maintain", he thought in his head. He was contemplating whether or not to get a child of his own. He was lonely, no one to love, no one to care for. So Miss Jessica called everyone 2-6 years old to come.

With help from a older person, everyone 2-6 came downstairs. Quackity looked at everyone, and wondered which child he would bring home. Then he looked at you. you looked so adorable, so cute. He asked you, "Hey kid, what's your name." "I'm Y/n, how are you." you smiled at him with barely any teeth. He pulled you gently off to the side, "Hey kiddo, do you want to come with me to my house?" "Yes Mr." you answer.

You were glad to go to Quackity's house, you never had any love from anyone.

-

(Spongebob theme) 8 years later

You were 10 years old, living happily with Quackity. 8 years ago, he came to the orphanage and picked you up, ever since, you were showered with love and care. But there was one thing, you never called Quackity dad. You would just call him Alex or Quackity.

“Hey Quackity, what’s for lunch?”

“Ummm, some pizza with wings, buffalo right?”

“Yeah.”

Quackity felt bad, you never and did call him by dad, or any parental name. “Hey kid, can i talk to you about something.”

You put down your water, “Yeah, what’s up?” “So lately I’ve noticing that you have been calling me by my name?”

“Are you uncomfortable with me using your name.” you asked. “No, no, but it’s kinda weird, since, yaknow, I adopted you, and I’m a parental figure in your life, so maybe if you would call me dad or another parental name that would be cool?”

“Ohh, the only reason I was calling you by your name because I thought you were uncomfy with me calling you dad?”

“Oh thank goodness, I thought I did something wrong.” he sighed out.

"Could I possibly call you papa, since you-" he cut you off by hugging you. He squeezed his arms around you really hard, 'YES, YES, ANYTHING."

So after that, you would call him papa or dad, and sometimes use his real name.

-

6 years later, you were 16. The election happened, the calling out of the votes, Coconut2020 coming in fourth, which was last, who was lead by Fundy and Nihachu, Schlatt2020 coming in third, lead by Jschlatt, Swag2020 coming in second, lead by Quackity who is your papa and Georgenotfound, and Pog2020 coming in first lead by Tommyinnit, Wilbur Soot, and Tubbo. Also the sudden announcement of Schlatt2020 and Swag2020 polling votes, and the speech by Schlatt stating that Wilbur Soot and Tommyinnit were no longer citizens of L'Manberg now turned Manberg.

You were surprised, you didn't know that your father with add his votes with Schlatt's. So immediately after Wilbur and Tommy got banned from Manberg, Quackity and Schlatt called you and Tubbo up to the stage. "HEY YOU TWO, COME UP HERE." Schlatt yelled at you both. You both were reluctant to go, Schlatt was scary, his ram-horned self.

"It's ok Y/n, you're ok." your father told you. You stiffly went up the stage with Tubbo. "Tubbo, I want you to be the Secretary of State, and Y/n, I want you to be the First Lady, since your dad is the Vice-President." Schlatt demanded you both to be.

You didn't really want to be in a position of power. You were happy with living with Quackity, in L'Manberg, with no place of authority over anyone.

"Are you sure Schlatt, I mean, I suck at authority." said Tubbo. "Yes, I'm sure, I'm totally sure."

-

You were doing some paperwork for Schlatt when Tubbo came into your office, "Y/n, Schlatt and Quackity want you in their office."

"Ok, I need to finish this paperwork for Punz, he needs-"

"They said it's urgent."

"Fineee." you got up from your chair, "Thanks Tubbo, by the way, can you finish the paperwork, if you aren't busy."

"Yeah sure Y/n, just hurry up, they are really acting crazy in there." he jokingly stated. "Trust me, they're doing nothing."

You went out of your office, and walked all the way to Schlatt's. There, you found Quackity and Schlatt sitting together, talking about some random presidental shit. "Hey, what you guys needed me for?" you asked. You were desperate to go back to your office, still not used to this place. "We need to tell you something." they synchronized.

"Okkk, so what?"

"Umm, well Y/n, meet your new dad." you gaped at Quackity, then Schlatt repeatedly.

"NOPE."

"NEVER."

"WHY HIM."

"HE SUCKS ASS."

"HE SMELLS LIKE CIGARS AND ALCOHOL, WHY WOULD YOU WANNA DATE SOMEONE WHO SMELLS LIKE THAT."

You rambled on and on until Quackity covered your mouth to stop your obsequent talking, "Calm down mi quierda, first of all, it's not your choice, he makes me happy, I make him happy, and lastly, he smells great."

"YEAH I DO, YOU TELL HER BABE, I DON’T STINK." Schlatt yelled across the room.

“But why him, like there is multiple other people who is better than him.” you whined.

“Ok kid, I like, no love him, he loves me, why can’t you be happy with that.” Schlatt told you irritated.

“But-”

“No buts, just please be supporting of us, please mi amor?”

“Fine, doesn’t mean I like it.”

-

After that little argument you had with Schlatt and Quackity, you finished leftover paperwork so there wouldn’t be a pile of it when you came back to the office the next day.

You heard a knock on the door, and told them to come in. To your surprise, annoyingly, it was Schlatt, holding up your favorite hamburger from McDonalds. “Hey kid, what you doing?” he asked you.

You didn’t respond to him, trying to stay silent and finish the paperwork. “Your dad told me your favorite meal from McDonald’s, yaknow, as a present I guess.”

You still ignored him. "Kid, I know you don't like me, I wouldn't like me either if I found out my dad was dating-" you interrupted him, "It's not that, I want dad to be happy, it's YOU, you don't deserve his love. Do you understand Schlatt?"

He put his hand on your knee, "I know, I don't deserve him, I'm not trying to replace anyone in your life, I just want to make Quackity and possibly you happy."

You blankly looked at him, "Ok, that was a good statement, but if you hurt dad, I will make sure you live the rest of your life feeling like shit."

"We got a deal kid, you accept this partnership between me and your dad, and I'll won't break his heart, deal?"

You shook his hand, "Deal Schlatt."

-

"Hey kid, we're going out to a date, you want anything from outside?" Schlatt knocked on your door to your room. You were reading your favorite book when Schlatt interrupted your reading process, "Nah, have a good date."

You were kinda accepting Schaltt dating Quackity. You didn't like their PDA though. It was absolutely digusting, but it made your father happy. "Hey babe, what you doing in here?" Quackity appeared at the frame of your door. "Nothing, just talking to little ol' Y/n, isn't that right?"

"Yes, don't call me that though." "Ok then, you ready babe?" asked Schlatt. "Yeah, Y/n, don't do anything stupid while me and Schlatt are gone." You rolled your eyes, "I'm not going to do anything stupid papa, just have a great night with Jcum." "HEY, DON'T CALL ME JCUM."

"Love you both." you got back into your book, not knowing that the both of them were shocked.

Those three little words got both of them gaping at you. You didn't like Schlatt from the beginning, and you were saying to him "love you"? "What did you just say mi amor?" "I said love you both." you didn't know that those words were significant to Schlatt.

He wanted your approval of dating Quackity, since you are his only daughter. "HOLY SHIT, YOU SAID LOVE YOU TO ME, TO ME." Schlatt leaped with joy. "Don't take it too serious Jschlatt, you kinda warmed up to me these past weeks." you smirked.

He walked to your bed, and hugged you with all his might.

"Schlatt."

"What are you doing?"

"You are squeezing me too tight."

"I can't breath right now, let go of me."

You squeezed out, he was crushing all the oxygen out of your body, "Sorry, Y/n." he shyly spoke, rubbing the back of his neck. "Schlatt, we have had a lot of arguments, I didn't like you, still kinda don't right now, but you are actually a good person, and I actually, not fakely, approve you to date my dad."

Schlatt ran out your room screaming repeatedly, "YES, LET'S GOOO."

-

Quackity was out doing some random things for Schlatt, while you were cooking Schlatt's favorite food. Since last week you declared that you were actually ok with their relationship, you actually got comfortable with Jschlatt being near you.

It was a teasing relationship, you guys making fun of each other when the other did something wrong. To kinda celebrate the event, you were making food. You heard the door open, and there Schlatt was in his presidential suit. "Hey Schlatt, what's up?" you questioned while mixing the pasta in the pot.

He took of his jacket, shoes, and tie, looking stressed, "Nothing kid, just stresed out" "About what?" "Tubbo needs a lot of items to get something for me, but I don't have them." he sighed. "What does he need?" "He needs stupid netherite, the only thing I don't have in hand." "I actually have some, I could give it to Tubbo." you stated. "Thanks kiddo." "No problem Schlatt."

"Anyways, food is going to be ready in an hour."

"Thanks, I'll be in my room."

"Ok dad." He stopped in his tracks, "What did you just say to me." "What do you mean?" "Y-you just called me dad." he stumbled on his words with unbelief lacing them.

You smiled over your shoulder, "Maybe I did, maybe I didn't, who knows?" "You actually consider me to be your dad?"

"Well yeah, you're nice to me and papa, you take care of me, you love me, so why not?"

He hugged you from behind, "Thanks kiddo, I'll receive this announcemet with honor," he jokingly stated. "No problemo dad, just go take a shower, you stink." "NEVER." he wrapped his arms around you as much as he could.

(This is the end of this first part, this is my first time making a series, let me know what you think)

#mcyt x reader #dream smp x reader #schlatt x reader #schlatt x y/n #schlatt x you #jschlatt x reader #jschlatt #jschlatt x you #quackity #quackity x reader #quackity x y/n #quackity x you #mcyt x you #mcyt x y/n #dream smp x you #dream smp x y/n #sapnap x reader #karl jacobs x reader #sapnap x you #karl jacobs x you #fluff #karl jacobs x y/n #sapnap x y/n #karlnapity #karlnapity x reader #karl x you #karl x reader #karl x y/n #louistommosnesquickmilk writes #louistommosnesquickmilk