#i hate that. i hate you media who have characters with touch aversion as a flaw

[redysetdare]

Thinking abt how so many characters in media who canonically state that they don't like people touching them constantly have their boundaries broken and are forced into hugs by other characters and every single time they are shown to be upset it's supposed to be a flaw that they need to overcome until they just are forced to accept/like it.

#text #touch averse #no wonder ppl assume the same of real ppl #everyone wants to think of themselves as the acception as the one who will fix you and make you like hugs #i hate that. i hate you media who have characters with touch aversion as a flaw #we need more characters who are just touch averse and people accept that #no acceptions no 'growth' no 'fixing them' or 'making them love hugs' nothing. #only thought abt this becuz im rewatching kipo and it bugs me so much that wolf tells kipo to not hug or touch her #and kip just responds with 'deal with it' and then later on wolf is suddenly fine with hugging and repeats kipos line #it feels so wrong because it was a blatant disrespect of boundaries that was played off as a good thing

[reimenaashelyee]

Clean version here

Not a bingo but a jenga. My responses below the cut

Somehow I have half of this image filled out. I wish I could cash it in for points to redeem.

Jenga:

First comic is a magnum opus: There had been a string of graphic novel adaptations of books I wanted do when I as a young teenager, but The World in Deeper Inspection was my first, substantial, original behemoth of an idea. It was the only one with the power and the potential to stay and push me to become a comics creator. Everything I am and have as an artist and writer is because of TWIDI.

Fan art more popular than OCs: This was going to be inevitable because I hardly ever post about them online. But I suppose if you count my one-off character design illustrations that go viral or my published graphic novels, this box wouldn’t be true… (The God of Arepo is my most popular fan work)

I binged your life’s work in 2 hours: I am glad you like my work enough to be this engrossed in it – but honestly please please reread it again and SLOWLY so you can appreciate the visual storytelling – not just the words and the main action!! You’ll have a fuller experience if you take the time to luxuriate!!

This isn’t even my day job: It both is and isn’t. I do enough from comics that I can survive out of it near full time (thanks to my usual speed; very grateful), but I get financial stability from the monthly paycheck from the actual day job. Relying on my speed to produce near-constant output for money is something I am losing interest in as my ideas become more ambitious and niche.

Subscribe to my Patreon: Somehow I am able to hawk my free-to-read platforms with a certain amount of success but never can get a big dent on my Ko-fi.

Received unsolicited critique on a free comic: Unavoidable reality. Though I hadn’t had something egregious in a long time (and it better stay that way).

Had to explain what a webcomic even is to someone IRL: Nearly all the people I surround myself with are ‘normies’ (people who aren’t so online and/or don’t read online media), so this comes up often – and it will become more frequent as I pursue institutional pathways like residencies and grants. Even if they knew what webcomics were, it would be under the name of webtoons.

I can’t wait to draw this scene in 4 years: lol @ Alexander Comic and TWIDI

Multi-year hiatus: TWIDI’s eternal curse, until I figure out how to build enough stability in my career/life to return to it – full-time and for real.

Financially supported by someone else: My dayjob, mainly, but previously my parents.

Is somehow mutuals with favourite artist: That’s what it’s like as your career progresses and matures! It’s always nice to become peers with those you admire – especially the ones you grow to love only after knowing them.

Characters get gayer over time: Growing up and being able to witness the various ways of living can and will change how one approaches their characters.

Successfully fulfilled a Kickstarter: Not on my own, but I had a few for my books that published smoothly.

Empty space:

ADHD diagnosis: I have ADHD-esque behaviours that I have managed to overcome with ADHD-specific hacks, but whether I actually have the thing itself is a question mark. I lean towards not really having it since I am able to execute and complete tasks regularly.

Works in animation or went to school for it: I used to want to study and work in animation before I discovered the potential of comics as a storytelling medium. I don’t have a desire to break into that industry, even without all the employment and late-capitalism instability that it’s going through right now. I am not averse to trying if asked, however.

Had an art teacher who hated anime: Never went to art school.

Yes I’ve had burnout but what about second burnout: Currently going through a fallow period, but I really don’t think it’s Burnout Burnout. Touch wood, I continue to maintain my love, interest and desire to make comics and stay in my artistic career.

Forgot how to draw main character’s face: Characters are so seared into my brain, it’s not easy to forget. Helps that they each have particular quirks that belong to their design.

This comic gave me my hand/wrist injury: Still out here WITHOUT any of those. I hope I can keep it that way until whenever I retire.

Emergency commissions: Hopefully I will never have to resort to do this. (Very grateful, yes)

Sleep… “schedule”? my 7-8 hours of sleep is essential and non-negotiable.

If it’s not 3 hours long is it even worth adding to the work playlist: This is is referring to video essays I guess? I rarely ever encounter essays of over 3 hours that I am interested enough to watch. (Also I can’t really watch something while drawing; I lose speed/concentration)

Embarrassed to look at early pages: Not embarrassed – I was younger and less-skilled then, that’s just how it is. There were a lot of things younger me did that I could still learn from.

Regrets costume choices: I pride myself in being able to style myself and my characters, and so far I have never regretted the clothes I give my characters – the TWIDI characters all have base outfits from when I was 15!

#artist meme

[autismserenity]

Howdy, I don’t know who to send this to but can you debunk this clowns claim that Jughead was a homophobic caricature and therefore can’t be ace? This post has bother me for years: rabbittiddy(.)tumblr(.)com/post/157508044328/missvoltairine-acesarelgbtgranny

i fucking bet! let's see, i think I saw a good debunking of that....

i'm gonna end up doing one myself while i look for it, aren't i

Some of these focus on him being aro. But it's sort of a stand-in, in the comics, for him being both aro and ace. Anyway, I tried to pick stuff that highlighted the fact that Jughead wasn't a woman-hating gay-coded 'confirmed bachelor.' He was a romance-hating, often touch-averse, ace-coded 'confirmed bachelor.'

There are plenty of examples of the former, throughout popular media, during the first 75 years of Archie Comics. The queer-coding for them is completely different. The only similarity is that both types were often shown as recoiling from even the idea of relationships with women.

Some of the queer-coding for gay men included high voices, limp wrists, being an interior designer -- "feminine" attributes." Or:

"‘friend of Dorothy’, coloured handkerchiefs, or soft, pastel, violet clothing. Because film at the time was black and white, colour coding was either referred to, or often the handkerchief would be ‘perfumed.’ "In The Maltese Falcon (1941) a character sends in his business card and Sam Spade’s secretary notes it smells of 'gardenias.' A few minutes later, Spade smells the man’s handkerchief and doesn’t say anything but does raise an eyebrow high, clearly telling the audience ‘this fellow is queer.’.

"Otto Preminger’s Laura overtly coded Waldo Lydecker as queer: shooting him in a bathtub with plenty of suggestion he was interested in McPherson; playing up his impeccably dressed dandy-ness; clearly portraying him as the sharp-tongued gay-best-friend type."

By contrast, Jughead was never portrayed as anything but a clever, independent, slightly self-centered high school guy with a high metabolism and a passion for hamburgers. There was no winking at the audience. There were no gay in-jokes. There were no hints, in any decade, that maybe there was "a reason" he didn't like girls. That maybe he was just closeted.

And notably, when the series introduced a gay character, they did NOT go for Jughead. They had to invent a completely new person.

If they had ever been hinting that Jughead was gay, he would have been the obvious choice. It would have raised a lot of questions, and probably a lot of concerns, for them to introduce Kevin Keller instead -- or, at least, for them to introduce him and not imply that he and Jughead were going to end up together.

Honestly, the true test for any of these bigots who claim Jughead is gay should be, "Can you really picture him with Kevin Keller?"

Instead, mainstream pieces at the time said things like, "Jughead came out as asexual which explains why he’s never seemed interested in anything except for cheeseburgers."

Here are some good examples from older canon:

"Twelve Cent Archie references a story from Jughead 119 (April 1965) in which a machine built to identify Jughead’s perfect romantic partner inevitably self-destructs due to the impossible nature of its task."

"And though he wasn't a 'confirmed aro/ace' in the original comics and a few issues tried to explain away his behaviors with random back stories, over the course of hundreds of issues it was made obvious he preferred food to woman and constantly avoided romantic interactions and relationships and loathed such endeavours."

"What is it about aromanticism that makes showrunners pretend we don’t exist and fellow aces turn their faces when we say we do? What’s so bad about saying no to love that an aromantic asexual character is allowed to say he doesn’t like sex on TV, but not to say he doesn’t like romance? What is the difference? Why is it here where everyone draws the line? Why is it okay to not feel sexual attraction in this case, but not okay to not feel romantic attraction?

"I will tell you why. I’m not available to anyone. Neither is Raphael and Jughead, and lots and lots of aroaces, some of us not even as queerplatonic partners. There aren’t love stories to be told about us or sold about us. If Jughead and Raphael are made ace and aro, their ships sink, unless their fans are okay with queerplatonic relationships and most aren’t. For many people, for most people, if you take the romance out of someone, that someone loses its meaning, its interesting aspect. That’s how focused on romance our society is. Ships can survive without sex, but in a society so focused in romance that it can’t even comprehend queerplatonic relationships, they can’t survive without romantic love.

"There is also the little matter of we aroaces being considered too weird, too different. Cis allo straight people can’t relate to us the way they can relate to you, alloromantic aces. After all, romance is universal, right? Except it isn’t. And if we are in the picture, we are reminding everyone of that, and some people just don’t like that, don’t like us."

[image transcription: a page titled "Archie in The Look of Love - script: frank doyle; pencilling - dan decarlo jr; inking - jim decarlo." Archie and Jughead are walking down the street, and have the following conversation over several panels. Archie: "Got a question for you, Jug! Do you believe in love at first sight?... Jug? Did you hear me?" Jughead: "I heard something! But I'm sure you didn't say what it sounded like you said!" Archie: "I asked if you believed in love at first sight!" Jughead, to the reader: "He did! Did you hear? He actually asked that question of ME!"]

[image transcription: the second page of the comic continues their conversation. Archie: "Stop talking to them and answer my question!! Do you believe in love at first sight?" Jughead: "Not hardly! Twelfth, maybe, or forty-eighth... or more likely, nine hundred and sixth! What's with you, Arch? You know girls are not my thing!" Archie: "I wasn't thinking of girls!" Jughead, his hat flying off in shock: "WHAT!?" Archie, hearts flying around his head: "With me it's that little red convertible in Bedell's auto showroom!" Jughead: "Oh! - Love for inanimate objects! Now you're in my ballpark!!"

[last three panels. Jughead: "Y'know how those surfer guys travel the world, looking for the perfect wave?" Archie: "I saw the pic! But who--" Jughead, head surrounded by many, many little pink hearts: "Exactly! I search for the perfect burger! Now that'd be my love at first sight!"]

[an old panel in which a shocked crowd of high school students is hearing Jughead's voice, over the loudspeaker, saying: "I am in no way a romantic! I stand by my ways as a lover of food only! The only girls I like are Swiss Miss, Mrs. Butterworth, Little Debbie and Sara Lee!"]

AHA YEP I HAVE FINALLY FOUND THE POST I WAS THINKING ABOUT!

[jughead and archie are coming out of a movie theater. jughead says, "That's what I dig in a movie - a happy ending!...The girl didn't get the boy!" Archie reacts with heterosexual surprise and confusion/]

#asexual jughead #jughead is canon aroace #aroace representation #ace representation #aro representation #i have always loved jughead and i wouldn't have read the comics without him tbh #i never thought about it before but the whole series is very dating-obsessed without him and he provides this foil that let me ignore that #and not feel like it was pressuring me to be the same way #wall of words

[dayurno]

What is the thing you disagree with in most fanon portrayals of Neil?

i used to think it was because neil was shoehorned into 'feminine' roles (whatever i thought that may be, looking back) and ultimately changed as a character to fit whatever the narrative required of him, but now that i am older and (?!) wiser i do believe my original feelings towards the ever mythicized ooc feminine neil were born from a place of rejection for gender non-conforming people, and an overall aversion to the idea of femininity (arguably one of the most important aspects of who i am, true then and true now) being tied in any way with sexual expression and preference.

i will say this. i think the knee-jerk rejection of saying 'not all gay men are feminine bottoms!' to content where one of them is, in fact, a feminine bottom, is not unlike lesbians in my own community who protest to the idea that all lesbians are man-hating hairy dykes (and try not to swoon just at the mention!). we reject gender non-confomity; we don't want it to represent our communities. we want to be one of the good ones. i'm a lesbian, but i'm not like those masculine dykes. i'm a gay man, but i'm nothing like those hyperfem sissies. fandom had come to a point where we genuinely thought conformist gender expressions were somehow lacking representation; we sincerely believed the idea that a couple made up of two masculine, gender-conforming men were somehow closer to the real deal than a couple where one of them was either feminine-presenting or had traits that can be associated with femininity.

i lived with this idea for a long time, until i started frequenting queer spaces in my area and realized that actually, in the material world, where i live, where you live, effeminate gay men do not have it easier than their masculine counterparts. the idea that they can be 'over-represented in media' is null. my feminine male friends don't allow themselves to be seen out on the street in so much as a crop top. one of the most common dealbreakers in dating apps for gay and bisexual men is gender non-conformity. a lot of arguments against feminine men who prefer to bottom in media is that 'no gay people are like this', but that is just patently untrue; my best friend in the whole world is a feminine-presenting gay man with a strict preference for being in the bottom. a girl i bought a beer for was a stone top, hyper-masculine, touch-me-not butch. for queer people, gender presentation and sexual activity cannot always be cleanly separated.

i guess (and sorry for how long this is clearly i have Thoughts) my ultimate point here is that i let my own personal disagreement with how neil is portrayed to convince me that there is something wrong with him (and, at large, any male character) being portrayed as someone who is feminine, or has strong sexual preferences, or has personality traits traditionally associated to femininity. i think that is never, ever, ever a solution for anything. there is never going to be a time where we would be right to shun and scoff at content written about gender non-conforming characters, even if they are not canonically gnc. do i still think neil is written in ways that go directly against how his personality is portrayed in canon? yes, but that is a personal opinion, and not something i should try and rationalize in social justice terms, if you get my point. i can just not like it. and i don't. no hard feelings involved :)

#asks #sorry i realized i didnt actually answer much of ur question re: neil but its because i truly think #i would be a massive hypocrite if i sat here and told you i think people are wrong for writing neil in ways similar to how i write and thin #about kevin #of course i think sometimes stuff is ooc and bad and their personalities are altered drastically to fit within #what the writer considers to be feminine #but ultimately that is just annoying. it doesnt hurt anyone and it certainly is not any worse #than fics where they are hypermasculine sadist doms #does that make sense? i can just not like it. but i am in no position to say it shouldnt exist #yes its bad. but bad things still have the right to exist. such is life #neil

[ciaossu-imagines]

Still keeping with the same prompt, just with the fandom changing to Mystic Messenger! There’s actually only a few polyships I really enjoy for this fandom and chose randomly from those ones so I hope all my Mystic Messenger fans will enjoy the polyship headcanons for Yoosung/Reader/Saeran!

Who’s the cuddler?

I have always had this strong headcanon that Saeran is a little touch-averse at first. He really wants that physical affection, truly he does. But it makes him uncomfortable and a little scared for quite a long time and it needs to be something that he’s eased into and given space and time to become comfortable with. Yoosung would be the more physically affectionate on initially because he just really loves the little acts of holding hands or cuddling with you. They make him genuinely happy. In the long term, though, after he’s become more okay with it, I feel like Saeran is the more physically affectionate one overall, with long, firm hugs being his thing.

Who makes the bed?

It would have to be you because honestly, both of these boys are kind of slobs in that regards. They just don’t think to make the bed unless they’re told to or someone makes a comment about it. That being said though, Yoosung changes his sheets more than Saeran does.

Who wakes up first?

I honestly feel like it would have to be you or Yoosung but only like 90% of the time. The other 10% it’s Saeran, but only because he just plain out hasn’t slept. I’ve always strongly headcanoned that Saeran has issues with sleep and there are times that he’ll go days without sleeping and then just micro-naps until his body just can’t handle it anymore because both his mind and body are just too exhausted, and he crashes. Yoosung, if given the choice, will prefer to sleep in a bit, especially if he’s spent the night up with you and Saeran or up gaming but he can get up early for school or work.

Who has the weird taste in music?

Saeran’s tastes run weird because they’re really split between what Saeran likes from childhood, what he liked in his Unknown persona, and what he liked as Ray. Ray preferred soft music and instrumentals or classical music from the Romantic period, while Unknown was really into trap and rap music. Saeran though…he remembers the songs Saeyoung sang with him as children and lullabies soothe him still.

Who is more protective?

I feel like Yoosung can get more protective, definitely, and especially so after everything that happens in the game. It can come across at times like he doesn’t trust you or Saeran or doesn’t think you guys will make the right decisions because he’s incredibly poor at finding the words to describe why he worries so much about you and usually ends up putting his foot in his mouth a little. It’s actually what causes most of the larger fights with Yoosung.

Who sings in the shower?

Saeran does it. He hates singing in public because it embarrasses him to have people watch him sing. He’s fine with singing to you over the phone or when your eyes are closed and he thinks you’re sleeping…but the shower is his private spot where no one watches him and, because he genuinely enjoys singing, he lets himself do it in there.

Who cries during movies?

Oh my god but is Yoosung ever a sap when it comes to anything even remotely sad during a movie. He just gets really into his media, and he connects deeply with those fictional characters and when bad things happen to or for them, it can upset him deeply. There were definitely cut scenes even in just his video games that made him tear up.

Who spends the most while out shopping?

Yoosung can live on a pretty reasonable budget but has a tendency to throw money away on games when he has a rough day. Saeran…despite growing up with relatively nothing, really, he never quite learned the value of money or how to budget it or manage it and he’s the worst one for spending without thinking, especially so if he’s using card instead of cash.

Who kisses more roughly?

Saeran’s kisses are hesitant, especially at first, but can become very rough when he gets comfortable or stops feeling embarrassed and just surrenders to the moment.

Who is more dominant?

It would have to be a combination of both you and Saeran. Yoosung is definitely quite submissive. He would honestly be just as happy to turn over every big decision to you and Saeran and have you two make all the decisions. Saeran’s streak of dominance is more out of needing to feel like he’s in control of his life and his decisions after so long of not having any control over those things.

My rating of the ship from 1-10?

Honestly, it’s probably about 6 or 7 out of 10. It’s not an absolute favourite, I have to write about it so much kind of love, but I’m definitely a fan because I think these two balance each other out well and would interact with both each other and with the lovely readers (or myself, if I’m having fun with self-ship fantasies) in such interesting ways.

#mystic messenger #mysmes #headcanons #polyship #yoosung kim #saeran choi

[gourde]

Hot takes coming in HOT. Most are hot takes, like actual hot takes.

IDW Sonic is the best iteration of the character sorry. He's not too different from what Sonic has always been at his core and he feels more like a character than anything. Maybe it's just me being a Transformers fan and there are so, so many different versions of the characters. One of the best TF shows is Animated and it took a ton of risks. Doesn't mean it's bad. Still has the main idea at the core.

And while Archie Sonic is mean as hell he is in no way the worst.

The most boring Sonic media in general is Sonic X. It's nothing to me. It's like white bread. If I want to see aliens from another world with a couple human characters I'd just watch Transformers. And it's not just my tastes, it's just. Nothing. Really. X's Sonic is the worst in my opinion.

Also back to Archie people are way too mean to it. STOP BEING MEAN TO ARCHIE I DON'T EVEN LIKE IT BUT I SEE WAY TOO MUCH HATE ABOUT IT IT'S JUST A COMIC SERIES THEY'RE JUST LIKE THAT though there is a ton of misogyny and racism you can easily tear into it about that.

The Sonic racing games are fun and such an obvious idea for a spin-off.

Satam isn't a good show either. I think most people like it just cause of nostalgia.

I'M SO SORRY ABOUT THIS ONE BUT I JUST CAN'T GET BEHIND SALLY. I don't like her. She's just... a character trope I've seen a thousand times before. Crazy male character, dumb male character, smart male character, and then level-headed female character who keeps them all under control. Like seriously? That's just. So common it's everywhere. Also her design sucks. It's bad. She is not a chipmunk at all.

In fact most Sonic characters look NOTHING like the animal they are and it BOTHERS ME

This is a common thought at least in the circles I'm in but so, so many fan ships are just. So boring. No matter what fandom you go to there will always be the token MLM ship where both male characters are all lovey dovey and kissy and smooshy it's not original.

Sonic and Shadow differ so much in personality they would never get together. Ever. I can't see it at all.

SONIC IS TOUCH AVERSE!!!!!!!!!

SURGE IS UNIRONICALLY THE BEST CHARACTER IN SONIC AND IT'S NOT EVEN CLOSE. Female character who hates everything, is evil, used, self destructive, around the age of 14, she would've been the best thing ever if she existed when I was in my early teens. Also she's GREEN and has SHARP TEETH and is allowed to be COOL AND SCARY EVEN THOUGH SHE'S A GIRL LIKE WE NEED MORE CHARACTERS LIKE THIS IN GENERAL IN EVERY MEDIA EVER

And people are SO SO QUICK to redeem her. I love redemption arcs as much as the next person but like. Let her be evil please. No one was clambering for Starline or Mimic or any other evil male character to be redeemed but suddenly peak female character comes in and she NEEDS TO BE SHIPPED WITH AMY STOP ITTTT STOP

AMY COULD NOT CONVINCE SURGE TO BE NORMAL AGAIN. Sonic already tried it. What would Amy do that would be different. Other than falling into the tired, bored trope of "Romance and love fixes broken people!" STOP THAT

Sonic Forces IS as bad as people said when it came out. It's not good. You can have fun with it I don't care but it's not a well made game at all.

Sonic Colours by extension despite being one of my favourites and I certainly have nostalgia for it (Especially the soundtrack) suffers a lot when it enters 2D. It's slow and bad to control. Like Sonic Forces but you can actually stomach it.

The original Sonic games and momentum are overrated as a gameplay mechanic. Games will evolve over time and switch things out. Character will evolve over time. That's okay. If things didn't change, even if you personally don't like it, the series would get stale and stagnate.

SA1 and SA2 are not as good as everyone remembers. Ignoring the jank there's just better 3D platformers out there.

That said SA1's spindash is so fucking fun I love spamming it in the hub world WEEEE WOOSH WOOSH WEEEE!!!

Sonic Heroes is SO broken you CANNOT ignore it for nostalgia sorry it's just. God. It's so infuriating to play. YOU FALL OFF ALL THE TIME

In fact nostalgia and constant shipping brain are kind of my biggest gripe within the Sonic fandom.

Sonamy is the worst ship in Sonic and it's not even a contest. It truly sucks so bad. Neither of them are good for each other. THE AGE GAP.

Sonic Frontiers is truly what we needed. We really, seriously needed Frontiers.

And while I am complaining a lot I think people complain too much about the Sonic games because it isn't what they look for in Sonic. It's such a long running franchise that has changed up many things about it which means there's a ton of people all looking for different things from Sonic. You cannot make a Sonic game that will make the majority happy. That's okay. We probably won't go back to 2D momentum in main line Sonic games (Ignoring classic games). That's also okay.

People just gotta be more chill regarding changes in Sonic in general.

Now that I think about every Sonic show has it's own big problems. None of them are great. Except Sonic Boom but it's indicative of a rather big slump in Sonic that relied on humour instead of sincerity.

But talking about that people ALSO have to realize that Sonic is for kid's first and foremost. It won't do anything insane crazy dark. It'll stay within parameters. It's for kid's. If you want toxic romance or whatever just go watch an adult show. This goes for any fandom really.

And finally, SONIC ISN'T WHITE!!!!!!

#rambling #sth #so turns out the type of line breaking i was using was making it so i couldnt post so. fixed it #also if anything needs clarifying send an ask and ill ramble more #except about sonic x. i can try but i just kind of hate that show and in order to know why #id have to watch it again #im not doing that.

[unladielike]

PROS AND CONS OF DATING VIVIAN.

the pros.

She’s a very cute, glasses wearing girl. Need I say more?

You will likely end up being her special interest... aka she will have a page in her notebook dedicated to you, with all your likes and dislikes written in it. Stuff like blood type, birthday, hobbies, kinks, and turn offs would also be included as well, but regardless, you can expect to be gushed about.

There will never be a dull moment with her, so you don’t have to ever worry about being bored.

She will bring you flowers, regardless of your gender.

Vivian will take care of you if you get sick. Seriously, this girl won’t take no for an answer and will see to it that your health improves!

It’s very likely you will be the only person she truly loves. Like, she may be sexually attracted to other people, but she’s not the type to really fall for others, so romantically speaking, she will only ever have eyes for you.

Vivian actually likes physical contact and being touched, so unlike most touch-averse autistic individuals, she adores PDA, to the point where she won’t be uncomfortable if you shower her with affection.

She’s a very good girl. For example, Vivian isn’t very motivated to cook for only herself, but if she’s cooking for two, you can expect consistent home-cooked meals. She will also actually listen to you and heed what you have to say, so if you tell her you’re lactose intolerant? Expect anything she bakes/cooks to have no milk in it.

Vivian is an extrovert, so if you’re not much a talker, she can do most of the talking for you.

She’s very open minded and fun-loving, meaning she will likely agree to tag along in whatever adventure you’re dragging her into.

Vivian will actually stop hating couples/media with romance and fictional couples in it, so if you guys are dating, her bitterness towards normies would fade.

You will be up to speed when it comes to Gen-Z language and internet lingo in no time, because this girl is very much a nerd who grew up with memes.

With her, cringe culture is basically dead; in other words, she will absolutely join you, decked out in full frontal cosplay, and even go as far as to Naruto run with you.

the cons.

Vivian may be eccentric, but she isn’t a manic pixie dream girl, so you may end up disappointed if she doesn’t give you important life lessons or improve your life in any meaningful way. I mean, this girl is dumb, to the point where she doesn’t exactly have the best head on her shoulders.

She will still love 2D characters, to the point where she will continue hyperfixating over them and writing fanfiction of them. She will, however, cease to have the desire to date them in real life.

She has very bad table manners... meaning she might shamelessly belch around you.

Regardless of your gender, she will ask if you would want to take a leak together at some point.

With actual boundaries being set, Vivian can eventually mellow out over time, but if you don’t play your cards right, she can become obsessed with you. Honestly, due to the fact she has compulsive sexual behaviour, chances are high she will instigate very inappropriate actions around you.. Basically, though, if you give her an inch, she will take a mile, and by having sex with her, you’re potentially putting your dick in crazy.

Does prefer men and masc-aligned individuals, so while she is capable of being attracted to women/gender queer folks, Vivian might end up becoming miserable in a monogamous relationship with someone who isn’t a man. Like... if she is strictly forbidden to explore her sexuality with men/masc-aligned individuals, there’s a high chance she will feel trapped in that relationship, but she will never express it to you, because she doesn’t want to hurt your feelings.

She’s a slob, so she won’t often brush her hair and will probably be found with her pant pockets hanging out. Coupled with the fact she struggles when it comes to executive functioning, there might even be times where she forgets to brush her own teeth.

Despite being a true girl at heart, Vivian isn’t stereotypically feminine and will act very boyish, to the point where she’ll be the one to hold out doors and pull out chairs for you.

Vivian’s stubborn... and can get very mean-spirited, if you end up making her angry.

Because she’s an autistic woman who refuses to mask, she might prove to be a bit too much for the average neurotypical person. Honestly, her autism isn’t a cute quirk you can simply love away; in fact, it’s very much a permanent part of her, so there may be days where you’re frankly frustrated with her.

Her sense of humour can be considered off-putting at times.

She will risk her own life in order to protect you, meaning Vivian would basically shove you away from a moving car and let herself be hit instead.

The older she gets, the more she would become disillusioned by romance, so there may come a point where she would regret being in a relationship, especially with how much hard work it is and how much compromise it requires. Of course, this doesn’t mean she would necessarily stop loving her partner, but she might have lingering doubts and uncertainties over a future with them.

If you’re a man, her parents will likely bug you about having kids and will ask when you’re planning on give them grandchildren.

#║▌ ⧼ ⸢ ʚɞ ⸣︳h̲e̲a̲d̲c̲a̲n̲o̲n̲s̲. ⧽ ― LET’S PRETEND I AM A FICTIONAL CHARACTER. #⸾ ❖︎ ⸾ ( ABOUT ) ⤹ •• 𝕧𝕚𝕧𝕚𝕒𝕟 𝕚𝕤𝕞𝕤. #⸾ ❖︎ ⸾ ( QUEUED ) ⤹ •• 𝕗𝕠𝕣 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕝𝕚𝕓𝕣𝕒𝕣𝕪. #[ I MIGHT NOT BE VERY SHIP-INCLINED ] #[ but lately... i've been thinking about what vivian would be like as a girlfriend ] #[ SO THIS POST ENDED UP BEING VERY LONG ] #[ hence why i placed it underneath a read more ]

[pickledpascal]

Elle, Why Are You Up?

Relationship: Benoit Blanc x Ezra Wayne

Word Count: 1.1k

Summary: Ezra comes home from his last press junket, only to find Elle and Benoit cuddled up while watching one of her favorite movies.

It was one of those days.

Ezra had been hard at work after the severeness of the pandemic died down. Movies were starting to come out more regularly, meaning some projects Ezra worked on years ago were finally coming out after being held back a year. So he had to go on press tours… leaving Elle and Benoit alone for weeks on end. They were fine as far as Ezra could tell. He face-timed them as frequently as possible. It was a little harder when Ezra was in another country and his morning would be their night. Elle and Benoit were getting along great, sometimes Elle would even go to Benoit’s office with him when she was free from college–mostly during the weekends or in the afternoon. 

It was nice to see them bonding, especially with the world starting to open things up again. It was slow–Ezra didn’t mind, he didn’t need to go out so it wasn’t the worst thing not to.

Thankfully, Ezra was going to be home for a little while. His last press junket for a movie titled “Death on the Nile,” a crime-mystery film that he realized was eerily similar to some of Benoit’s cases. Interesting…

“So, you’ve had an amazing career with such range between roles–from being Agent Tequila in Kingsman to playing alongside Lady Gaga as Jack Maine in A Star is Born–so what’s it like bouncing around all these character types?” A question he got a lot, really. It was somewhat tiring hearing the same sorts of questions over and over again but he did want to be an actor. This sort of stuff just came with the job. 

His answer usually went something like, “I think it’s fun. That’s what this job is for me, at least. I don’t get typecast unlike a lot of other actors. Which is great for me because when I started off I worried that I would be typecast in Indie or artsy films of being this depressed trans guy who deeply hated himself. Glad that didn't happen.”

"As far as celebrities go, you are far more mundane in your living. Is there any particular reason for this?" A different question, but a weird one all the same.

So Ezra would answer honestly, "I spend my money when I feel like it, I'm also not averse to spending it just because I can. My house–on the other hand–I don't need a big house. It's just me and my daughter," Somewhat of a lie but no one needed to know about Benoit yet. He wanted to keep him to himself for a little while longer. "I'd rather not have like five extra bedrooms I need to clean."

"So there's been rumors," Oh, this wasn't going to be good. Nor would there be much thought behind it. "About a special person in your life. Have you met someone?" 

Ezra could lie… except people were clamoring over him online. He wasn't one for social media, he had them–apps like Instagram and Twitter–and posted occasionally when he felt like it. Elle was the one to bring "thirst tweets" to his attention. He had to admit some of them were really nicely written. Perhaps it would squash some of them if he revealed he did have a romantic partner of some sort.

"Actually, I do. I won't say their name but I have a… romantic partner I'm currently trying to keep to myself as much as possible." He joked lightly.

Benoit was such a treasure and he didn't even know it. There's just something so special about him. Perhaps it was the way he dressed so nicely for any sort of occasion. Or maybe it's the way he'd come home from a particularly hard case and still joke around and have fun with Elle. Or just… the fact that he knew just how to comfort Ezra when he was feeling sad. A light touch on his thigh and a kiss on the cheek and it was like the brunet was healed. Nothing hurt anymore as long as Benoit was with him. 

"It's okay, darlin', you're alright. Breathe with me, hm?" Benoit would say, a gentle hand brushing through Ezra's hair. 

Ezra might have exuded confidence and strength for the public but, in private, he was just as traumatized as Elle when seeing the death of Duke. It was hard, having to be okay and be a father for her while also dealing with… everything. Benoit made it easier.

As soon as Ezra opened the door to his house, he could hear the faint voices of Mark Ruffalo and Jennifer Garner. Hm, 13 Going on 30. A classic. Seemed like Elle was doing the usual. A rom-com and some pizza. 

Except he could also hear the faint sound of crying. That couldn't be Elle, she saw this movie dozens of times. The end didn't affect her like that anymore. Venturing further into his own home, Ezra could see Elle and Benoit sitting together on the couch. Elle was clearly still munching on some popcorn, bottom of the bucket while Benoit had a few tissues crumpled up next to him as he wiped his eyes. Not to mention the two pizza boxes sitting on the coffee table, open with only a slice or two left in either of them.

"This is such a beautiful movie, just the Razzles and the… it's wonderful." Benoit took a deep breath as he wiped his eyes. Elle let out a laugh in response.

She patted his back slightly and cuddled up next to him. "I know, dad." Elle hummed with a smile.

Benoit could be quite the emotional man. He got attached very easily to things which was not the best in his line of work. Half of his clients were now his best friends.

Ezra let out a light laugh as he made his way to the couch. He sat next to Benoit, pulling him into his shoulder. Elle smiled widely and climbed over Benoit to hug her father which caused both of them to let out a breath. Elle wasn't as light as she used to be when she was a kid. Either way, it was nice to know he was missed. 

Benoit kissed Ezra's cheek as Elle cuddled up to his side, making Ezra wrap an arm around both of them. 

"Missed you." Benoit hummed, burying his face into Ezra's neck. 

Ezra let out a small chuckle, "I don't know, it seems like you two were having a lot of fun before I came home." He teased softly.

"Don't be an asshole to your boyfriend." Elle hissed, crossing her arms as she shook her head. Benoit let out a laugh at her comment.

Yeah, Ezra was missed but it was nice to know they'd survive without him. Benoit and Elle made a nice team. 

#oc #benoit blanc #benoit blanc imagine #daniel craig #benoit blanc x ezra wayne #glass onion #knives out #a knives out mystery #benoit blanc x oc #the missing link #elle wayne

[fricklefracklefloof]

comin just under the wire for ace week to bring you some of my favorite ace characters, canon or just my personal headcanons :)

jonathan sims is one of the first asexual characters i have ever encounted in media and his representation means the world to me. i couldn't be more grateful for the tma fandom for helping me realize my own asexuality and i hope this year we continue to remember jon's asexuality and not let it be forgotten <3

guillermo de la cruz isn't canonically ace and i love all kinds of different interpretations of him and his sexuality but my headcanoning him as ace is something that's just a bit personal to me. i can relate to his sheltered catholic upbringing as it was something that actually ended up making it more difficult for me to realize i was ace. i just like him i think he's cool

i used to be super against ace kaz brekker! but that was because i was aphobic at the time and repressing my own feelings. it irritated me that people seemed to conflate his traumatic experiences with asexuality but i've come to realize that that can be a very real thing that aces with that sort of trauma can identify with. that doesn't mean i think he's automatically ace because of his experiences, but i think it can have an effect. at the very least i think his aversion to sex or even touch is something that we aces can relate to, and i think it's beautiful that he can still have intimacy with those he loves without it

[image description: the first image is a digital drawing of jonathan sims, guillermo de la cruz, and kaz brekker. jon is a thin brown-skinned pakistani person with long wavy dark hair, and he's waving the asexual flag. guillermo is a fat light brown-skinned mexican man, and he is holding a larger blanket-sized version of the asexual flag that he is dragging behind him. behind the two of them is kaz, who is a pale white boy with dark hair that is shaved on one side. he's holding his golden crow's head cane over his shoulder and there is an asexual flag draped behind him.

after is a series of images with the same format of a chibi character and text above them. the first is of guillermo, who has text above him that says "asexuality is not infantilizing nor does it take away my agency!" the second is of kaz, whose text says, "asexuality comes in many forms!" the third is of jon, whose text says, "asexuality is not inherently white! our experiences will not all be the same", and the fourth is of me, taro. taro is a thin light-skinned mixed white and filipino boy with brown hair and a black shirt that says "TMA". handwritten text above him says "i hate sex but i like saying things are sexy because it's funny". end id]

#yeee!!!! #asexual #asexuality #ace pride #ace week #the magnus archives #what we do in the shadows #six of crows #grishaverse #shadow and bone #jonathan sims #guillermo de la cruz #kaz brekker #the magnus archives fanart #what we do in the shadows fanart #six of crows fanart #ali draws

[brawltogethernow]

@mirrorfalls�� submitted: Came across this while searching for James Bond’s scrambled-eggs recipe (long story). Your thoughts?

~~

But did you find James Bond’s scrambled eggs recipe?

In this article, Scocca laments his inability to find accessible, lighthearted superhero comics suitable to read with his young son, while also demonstrating a mysterious aversion to looking at DC and Marvel’s lines of comics for children, which is where the accessible, lighthearted superhero comics suitable for reading with young children are. He wants his elementary schooler to be able to safely have the run of all superhero media so he doesn’t have to touch the yucky baby books.

This is not an industry-wide crisis. This is just one dude who got paid to write an article where he accidentally exposed one of his personal hangups.

The child headed toward the trade paperbacks of Marvel and D.C. superhero titles on the side wall […] a few steps in front of me. […] Is he with you? a clerk asked me. I said he was. You know, the clerk said, we have a kids’ section. The clerk gestured backward, at a few shelves near the entrance. I said, Thanks, we know and tried throwing in a little shrug, as the kid kept going.

You can’t just turn a seven-year-old child loose in a comic-book store to look at the superhero comic books. […] My seven-year-old really wanted to see that last Avengers movie […] that is, he wished it were a movie he could see, but he understood that it was, instead, a movie designed to scare and sadden him—a movie actively hostile to people like him.

They have a children’s section. Because comics are a medium suitable for stories for everybody, and they are sold in comic book shops, which have sections, like bookstores. You can use this organization to find books that you know in advance are suitable for children. What goes in that category is determined by industry professionals. This area will be bigger the bigger the shop is. These comics are not lower quality that titles from the main lines. They are actually slightly better-written on average.

Your local comic book shop has considerately wrapped Empowered in a plastic bag, so your child will not be drawn in by a colorful superhero and accidentally read a graphic scene. If you think your kid might find a memoir about internment camps upsetting, it is your job to notice them picking up They Called Us Enemy and read the blurb on the back before you let them have it. This comic adults are meant to read is in a comic book shop because that is where comics are sold. Not every public place is supposed to be Disneyland.

Movies have ratings systems. If you do not want your child to watch a PG-13 movie, you will find that most superhero cartoons are for children. They are about the same characters. Some are quite good! I really enjoyed Earth’s Mightiest Heroes. Your child may like Avengers Assemble. At least I think that’s right. I’m always mixing those titles around.

This is a deeply weird bias for Scocca to casually demonstrate, because he identifies in the article that real childishness is striving for empty maturity.

He compares an old comic,

[…]a 1966 Spider-Man comic in which Spider-Man meets, fights, and defeats the Rhino; participates in a running argument between John Jameson and J. Jonah Jameson about his heroism; buys a motorcycle; breaks up with his first girlfriend, Betty Brant; flirts with Gwen Stacy; and reluctantly agrees to let Aunt May take him to meet her friend Mrs. Watson’s niece, Mary Jane.

and a new comic,

[…]a 21st century comic book in which Thor, brooding in a Katrina-destroyed New Orleans, beats up Iron Man. He also yells at Iron Man a lot about some incomprehensibly convoluted set of grievances, including involuntary cloning, that he believes Iron Man perpetrated against him while he was dead(?), and then summons some other Norse god from the beyond somehow for reasons having something to do with real estate. I think. Where the 1966 comic is zippy and fun and complete, the whole contemporary one is muddled and lugubrious and seems to constitute a tiny piece of a seemingly endless plot arc—simultaneously apocalyptic and inert.

and concludes that the edgier comic is actually less mature. This is true. (This is not news about mediocre comics.)

It also has nothing to do with either comic being child-friendly, the article’s nominal thesis, except in the sense that ASM #41 (yes, I eyeballed that from that summary, yes I am just showing off now) is better written, making it more everyone-friendly. It also has practically more space dedicated to word balloons than art and is about a college student juggling girl problems and a part-time job with a tyrannical boss. But the immature one, as Scocca points out, is dour.

These are both teenagery issues, separated only by quality. It’s true that lots of new comics published by the big 2 are bad in the specific way Scocca describes here, taking themselves too seriously and hauled down by associated stories instead of buoyed by them. Some are not! Some titles from these companies’ main continuities are zippy, contained, and child friendly. Give your child The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl! Or if you like vintage comics so much better, why don’t you…buy some?

The books on the kid’s rack are good and fun and totally suitable for parents to read with their children without wanting to scoop their eyeballs out. Scocca cites the Batman ‘66 comics as the brightly colored, tightly written all ages solution to his problem about sharing superhero stories with his son. My local comic shop stores this title in the kid’s section. I am glad that Scocca’s does not, as he seems to have a peculiar aversion to looking for comics to read with his son there.

Scocca cites Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse as a superhero movie he could watch with his kids. (I was surprised when this line made it sound like he has several. I don’t want to assume the other one isn’t in this article because they’re a girl, but I very much am assuming that.) Great! Go to the kid’s section and look for Marvel Adventures: Spider-Man. It’s a fun, zippy title directly inspired by ITSV where Miles, Gwen, and Peter superhero together. It’s much more tightly written than most of the various Spider-Verse comics, which are ambitiously messy ubercrossovers. You may not want to give those to children because they include murder and so on, but also you just have the choice between the two as an adult reader deciding how much continuity you want to deal with. Adventures is one of the only titles I would buy on sight before corona. The kid comic rack is a reliable place to take a break from How Comics Get Sometimes regardless of how old you are.

This article makes me feel quarrelsome. Maybe it’s that it doesn’t seem like exploration of a single idea so much as a loosely grouped bundle of things to kvetch about. Maybe it’s that the experience of getting into superheroes that Scocca describes experiencing, projects his seven-year-old son will experience, and from which he extrapolates a metaphorical microcosm of the history of the genre is completely alien to me.

Comic books [and] comic-book movies—are […] trapped in their imagined audience’s own awful passage from childhood to adolescence. A seven-year-old has a clean […] appreciation of superheroes. They like hero comics because the comics have heroes: bold, strong, vividly colored good guys to fight off the bad guys and make the world safe.

But seven-year-olds stop being seven. […] They become 13-year-olds, defensively trying to learn how to develop tastes about tastes.

The 13-year-old wants many things from comics, but the overarching one is that they want to prove that they’re not some seven-year-old baby anymore. They want gloomy heroes, miserable heroes, heroes who would make a seven-year-old feel bad. (Also boobs. They want boobs.)

Not because of the boobs line, although that does illicit an eyeroll that this gloomy thinkpiece is fretting over preserving the superhero experience of little boys who resemble the little boy the writer was while casually dismissing everyone else. I was one of those unlikable little seven-year-olds with a college reading level and the impression that maintaining it was the crux of my worth. I only read Books - distinguished media you could club someone with. I have a formative memory of pausing, enraptured, in front of a poster for Spider-Man 3, preparing to say that it looked pretty cool, and being beaten to the punch by my mother making a disparaging comment about how the movie was trash. It wasn’t out yet, but it was a superhero movie. That meant it was for loud, brainless children.

That was the total of my childhood experience with superheroes, excluding being the unwilling audience to incessant renditions of “Jingle Bells, Batman Smells” that left me wondering why in god’s name Batman’s sidekick was named Robin. I certainly never visited a comic book shop. I got into TvTropes, which got me into webcomics, which got me following David Willis, who got me into Ask Chris at ComicsAlliance, which led to me rewarding myself for studying like a demon for the AP tests with three volumes of Waid’s Daredevil, pitched as a return to the character being colorful and swashbuckling. I was seven…teen.

This is of the same thread as Scocca’s point that immaturity is running from childish things. It leaves me baffled that he doesn’t follow that maturity is embracing them.

I will disclose here that while I think it was dumb I had to overcome my upbringing’s deeply embedded shame associated with enjoying arbitrarily defined lowbrow media and children being childish, I think it’s fine that I was allowed largely unchecked access to technically age-inappropriate content. In my limited experience, content small children are too young for is also content they’re too young to understand, so it kind of just bounces off of them, and what actually ends up terrorizing them is unpredictable collages of impressions that strike out at them from content deemed perfectly child-friendly. I would not forbid a seven-year-old I was in charge of from seeing an MCU movie unless I had a reason to believe that specific child would not take it well. These are emotionally low-stakes bubblegum films. It will probably be easier to socialize with other kids if they have seen them.

But then, when I picture being in charge of a hypothetical child, I usually imagine this being the case because they are related to me, and the pupal stage in my family strongly resembles Wednesday Addams. ALL children love death and violence, though, right?? This isn’t a joke point. I know it looks like a joke point.

The MCU thing seems especially weird in light of the article’s particular focus on Spider-Man, which is the kiddie line of the MCU, even if they refused to waver from their usual formula enough to get a lower rating. Though I am more inclined to describe it as “preying on the young” than “child-friendly”.

(MCU movies are increasingly dubious propaganda, but I would not judge them in front of a child who wanted to watch them for that reason, just in case this led to them partaking of them without me the second they were old enough to and then they grew up to run a blog about them while our relationship suffered because they didn’t feel like it was safe to talk to me about their interests…Mom.)

I tried to overcome the philosophy of letting anyone read anything while compiling this handful of mostly-newish superhero recs for the road that anyone can read. (Handily, I have been in spitting distance of being hired as a comic shop clerk enough to have thought about it before):

For actual children:

Marvel Adventures Spider-Man (the new one is reminiscent of ITSV, the old one is more like 616) any DC/Archie crossover, Archie’s Superteens The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl (for bookish children who think they’re too good for comics and adults afraid of the kid’s section) Teen Titans Go (even if you hate the show) Superman Smashes the Klan

For teens:

Ms. Marvel Young Avengers (volume 2) Unbelievable Gwenpool Batman: Gotham Adventures Teen Titans Go (the tie-in comic based off the old show was also called this)

Here are a bunch of relevant C. S. Lewis quotes.

#me every time i read a comic book article by a rag not exclusively about comic books: i know more than you. #marvel #spidey #DCU #MCU critical #mirrorfalls #asks answered #submission #unearthed this and bashed it out in one sitting ... i have not been working on it since you sent it last year XD

[afoolforatook]

On fandom and tragic romance tropes, from someone who's lived it.

Okay, this is kind of…. Idk a very specific vent and tbh one I feel kinda bad about because I genuinely don’t want to make people feel bad for liking reading/writing romantic angst or tragedy and it’s really less of an individual issue than an overall attitude in fandom.

Like, it’s absolutely okay to like not happy endings, and angst doesn’t have to just be for cathartic relief. Angst isn’t only acceptable if it’s to process trauma, you’re allowed to like it just because that’s your taste.

But at the same time…. I can’t help but have very personal feelings about how a lot of fandom spaces treat tragic romance tropes…

(this got really long but... it's something I've wanted to address for a long time)

I'm far from secretive with the fact that when I was 20, my girlfriend Emma (19) was killed in a car crash, along with her younger brother, mother, and aunt, and that a lot of my art and writing is purposefully about processing and accepting that grief. Fandom has been a very important part of how I’ve gotten through the last five years, which I’ll get into a bit more in a minute, but tbh it’s also been a lot harder navigating fandom and especially anything ship-related since Emma died, because of how people tend to romanticize a character tragically losing a partner.

And honestly, it’s not just fandom, it’s media in general. And mainstream media focus on tragic sob stories, shock factor, and BYG tropes is definitely a big part of the problem.

But as much as fandom pushes against mainstream overuse of such tropes, there is a good portion of fandom that falls into the same type of issue. And not just ‘fandom’ in the usual sense, but literary communities, poetry, etc…

The amount of times I see stories or prompts about characters tragically losing their partner, and that being the climax of the story, and then next to nothing about that character actually navigating their grief or being able to eventually start a new relationship or just be happy is just…. It makes me feel physically ill.

Like, people saying how tragic love stories are more interesting than happy endings. Or seeing a post about tragic pairing prompts and people saying things like ‘or they think it's unrequited but then A dies and B finds a letter confessing and they really loved each other but now it's too late’ and more people being like ‘YES YOU GET IT THAT'S THE GOOD STUFF’

Just… really, honestly. It's okay to like angst, even really tragic angst. I’m not trying to guilt anyone out of that.

I just….. Most of the time people just talk about it like ‘oh yeah I love some of that good tragic love story shit’ and the stories focus on the build-up and the shock/trauma of the death as it happens and then the excruciating reaction of the survivor and then maybe a time jump to show them happy again.

But very rarely do people take the time to actually handle the grief. People like the good cry of a character mourning their partner, but the vast majority of creators and fans rush through or skip over everything after the initial drama and aftermath. The ‘tragedy’ is the only part they focus on, and then the story ends and they move on.

And like. Shit. I liked that stuff too, I wrote some of it, years ago. And I’m not saying you can’t ever just leave it there, or that if you want to write tragic romance you always have to explore all the long-term emotional consequences.

But try to have it in mind, to consider what message countless grief narratives that end after the funeral, or maybe a few weeks or months later, teach people about real-life grief. This goes for any kind of grief narrative, but the one I see most, the one I used to ‘enjoy’ most myself, is romantic.

But, after having actually lived it? And knowing I'll have to live the rest of my life as the part of the story that usually isn’t told? It turns my stomach the way it’s often handled.

Like seeing people gush about how angsty a fic/idea is, and ‘OH MY GOD SO SAD CAN YOU BELIEVE HOW TRAGIC HOW DARE YOU. I LOVE SEEING/PUTTING THEM THROUGH SO MUCH PAIN’ gets a bit uncomfortable.

Not because there’s something inherently wrong with ever reacting like that, but because most often I can turn around and have the same people not know how to react when I tell them about Emma, not know how to handle the same grief they were just gushing over in fiction, when it’s real.

Grief is isolating enough on its own, but then it just doesn’t feel great when the worst thing to ever happen to you is a huge trope that people gush over, while very rarely fleshing out the actual reality of what it feels like to go through that or how to respond to someone actually dealing with grief, and eventually having to deal with your own grief.

Tbh it’s why I really just kinda have an aversion to the word ‘angst’ in general, and don’t really like to refer to my own writing as angst, even though I know plenty of people might think of it as such. So much of fandom's handling of ‘angst’ has come to feel like voyeuristic tourism of the grief I deal with every day, and will for the rest of my life.

Just, I know people are always going to like tragic angsty romance, and that’s fine, and honestly, it's not even an issue of individuals, but of how fandom in general treats it.

And again, I really don’t want to make anyone feel bad for liking it, and it has its purposes. And even when it’s not for catharsis, it's okay to just like sad stories just because.

I just… I wish more people would keep in mind that it’s not just a tearjerker story trope. People really go through this. And they then often end up feeling very isolated because people around them don't know how to react to their grief, because their grief makes things awkward and a mood killer.

Like, if you love this kind of angst (and not because you personally relate to it or find it cathartic, but just because, just for fun) but then feel awkward around people talking about their real-life grief, maybe spend some time with that, and think about the topic as a real-world trauma and not just a dramatic story trope. (this doesn’t just go for grief. Any kind of trauma you don’t personally deal with, if you love reading/writing it but avoid actually listening to people talking about their real-life experiences with it, think about why that is.)

I just hate seeing loss and initial dramatic grief responses being this shock factor/tearjerker trope, without ever really seriously addressing long-term grief. Especially when it doesn't even do a time jump or anything, and just ends on the surviving character being forever destroyed; when it focuses on the idea of how sad it is for your favorite character to have to spend the rest of their life alone.

And that’s not even folding in any kind of BYG/queer tragedy tropes in canon or fandom spaces.

And like… on a much more individual, less practical point, I just… there’s nothing wrong with angst but honestly (and especially for characters whose canon is in no way tragic) every time I see it I just want to scream WHY…. Why do that to them!? I’m not saying you have to stop, or that you’re not allowed to write trauma you don’t deal with personally. But I will never not cringe a bit at the ‘painful enjoyment’ of a character going through the traumatic loss of a partner. And it’s a sentiment I don’t really see people being okay with in regards to any other kind of trauma.

I don’t have actual numbers, but it sure feels like fandom treats stories about romantic grief very differently than most other traumas. Other trauma, even other kinds of grief, like a close friend or a sibling or parent, etc. tend to at least try to touch on a theme of recovery, or that the emotional turmoil being covered isn’t just a fun angsty trope to spend a little time in and then move on. And of course, this isn’t universal and plenty of people don’t handle these other traumas respectfully or as anything more than dramatic fuel, but this is the trend I’ve personally seen in over 10 years of tumblr fandom. And to that point, even when traumas aren’t respectfully handled I’ve at least seen people try to bring attention to that, with posts about how to respectfully handle disability or addiction or mental health or abuse. I can’t remember off the top of my head a single post like that about grief, let alone specifically romantic grief. It seems to be commonly accepted that while most kinds of trauma can be explored, but still handled respectfully, the death of a partner can just be done for the Drama. People tend to try to learn about abuse or addiction experiences before attempting big angsty stories addressing that. But doomed romance and a grief-stricken lover (it feels like, in my experience) are much more likely to happen on a whim.

Generally, it feels like other kinds of trauma, while still part of ‘angst’ also keeps a sense of awareness of how that narrative reflects real people’s experiences. It’s not just heavy because it’s big dramatic fictional angst, but because it’s grounded in real-life trauma that everyday people who come across it might relate to. Like... I just feel like a lot of fandom spaces treat ‘major character death’ and tragic romantic trope tags as just filters, like they’re needed because ‘not everyone likes angst, it’s just not their thing’ without really acknowledging that it’s a real trauma that everyday people deal with, where (again, often, but of course far from always, and certainly not in mainstream) other tws and tags like assault or substance abuse, people understand that people they interact with might really deal with those issues and they try to not just use them as dramatic fodder and to portray them respectfully.

But grief, especially romantic grief, seems different. The number of people who will come across a fic or edit or piece of art about a tragic love story, and will have had that personal experience of losing a partner, is much lower than people with real experiences with abuse, or addiction, or mental illness. That’s not a bad thing. I wish none of you ever have to know what that feels like.

But because of that, tragic romance ends up seeming like this distant thing. Like it’s only in dramatic tv shows or movies or literature, or lives solely in angsty fandom spaces as a way to get out a good cry. It seems grand and Tragic, off in its own world of dramatic emotional story tropes.

It’s solely pretty dark edits put to song lyrics, or striking art, or beautifully written prose that rips your heart out. It’s Tragic Romance.

And there’s nothing wrong with that inherently. But for many people, it seems like that is what it becomes: fiction. An angsty trope.

I genuinely hope that’s all it ever is for all of you. I wish I could ensure that that good angsty hurt will only ever be a trope you visit when you need a good cry.

But it’s not just fiction.

It's not just angst for sake of drama or fun or poetic storytelling. It’s not grand or romantic or beautifully tragic.

It’s unbearable. It’s physical pain.

That’s not exaggeration or metaphor. It sneaks up on me out of nowhere and it literally feels like someone is crushing my chest. I’ve nearly broken my hand punching a wall because I needed to make something hurt more than this thing in my chest that isn’t even actually there but it hurts so much.

Tbf I think a lot of my attitude towards this really stems more from fandom trends from when I was younger, and I think a lot more people actually try to flesh out grief more these days. But I just remember so much tragic romantic fic and fandom love from when I was a teenager that didn’t go deeper than ‘look how heartbreaking this is it’s so sad, I wanna make everybody read it and cry and it’s just fun and a story, oh my god I couldn't live with that’

no, of course I don't have a few specific old fics or posts from like superwholock days in mind, that I used to gush over too, and now just the idea of makes me feel actually sick

Idk… like I said. I don't at all want to make anyone feel bad for liking that type of angst, and I feel kind of bad for criticizing it. It just…

It hurts seeing basically your exact situation on angsty prompt lists with people gushing about how good it hurts. Especially when the same people would be (and have been) deer in headlights when they find out you’ve lived the same thing. (Again, this goes for any kind of trauma trope, but most others I’ve seen at least some kind of discussion about before)

Just please, try to be mindful of not just how you write stories about grief, but how you talk about death angst in general. (again, certainly not everyone, but more and more) People know to not just romanticize abuse trauma or addictions or mental illness, and to research, and ask for advice to try to be respectful.

And it’s much more common for someone in fandom spaces, in their teens or 20s or 30s to deal with those sorts of trauma than having experienced losing a partner.

But we exist. And while there is plenty of media out there showing tragic young romance, there is very little (in my experience, after nearly five years of desperately looking) real-world acknowledgment and support, or proof that you’ll be able to survive that kind of loss and still be happy, and even less so if they’re queer.

In a couple of months, it will have been five years since Emma’s death. From day one I have not been private about my loss, whenever possible.

And in five years of saying “When I was 20 my girlfriend died.” to new friends, classmates, potential dates, fandom spaces, therapists, grief support forums, etc… do you know how many other people have told me that they also lost a partner as a young adult, whether queer or straight, by accident or suicide or illness?

Zero.

No one. I’ve had people say how they lost a best friend or a sibling or a parent. And those losses, those kinds of grief are certainly not any less traumatic than the loss of a partner. But even in real life, they’re different. Losing a partner, especially at a very young age when it’s likely your main romantic experience, has different emotional effects, and can be harder to find people who directly relate.

Five years. Zero people dealing with the specific facets of grief as me.

The ONLY times I have ever heard about stories like mine in real life are either the rare article or essay or celebrity story, of which I can probably easily count on two hands.

All the other representation I’ve found is in mainstream fiction and fandom.

And of those stories, those fics, that art, the vast majority have had the partner die in the last half, probably closer to the 75% mark, of the story or arc.

If I’m lucky, that last 25% will focus on the immediate aftermath and grief (especially in fic, while a lot of media might give you a few scenes, and then move on to other character arcs).

If I’m really lucky they’ll show some kind of time jump, to say ‘see, they’re still haunted by their lost love but they’ve tried to move on or can pretend to be happy’.

And so much fandom reception is centered around ‘it’s soooooo SADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD MY POOR HEART IT HURTS SO GOOD. LOVE ME SOME ANGST’, or romanticizing the idea of being unable to live without them, and if they can, it’s often never really putting focus on all the pain it took to process their grief.

Again, I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with this individually, or that you shouldn’t gush and scream over fic or art or prompts that hook you because of angst. But it adds up really quickly, especially when, even when getting good genuine support from people, you still see no one else actually living with that feeling like you. The only place you find it is stories, and then you see people mostly excited over just how beautifully sad it is.

And that just feels… I can’t explain it honestly.

Just, think about how you react to or talk about fic or prompts or art about a character crying over their partner’s body, or attending their funeral, and think about whether you’d feel appropriate doing the same if instead, they were dealing with abuse, or addiction, or self-harm.

Again, that’s not to say you can’t ever gush or key smash or such, but is it all you do?

You don’t have to stop enjoying angst and tragic romance. But think about how I just said that.

Enjoy.

Do you only ever act like you ‘Enjoy’ it (and yes, this includes the ‘I’m such a masochist I just love to cry over them, it’s emotional release that doesn’t trigger me’ reaction), and romanticize it?

It’s fine to, sometimes. But do you also appreciate it, and try to understand the real-world weight of it? Do you know what you’d say to a friend if they told you they’d lost a partner?

That ‘love me some good angst’, Dramatic grief, being the main fandom attitude doesn’t just hurt me or others who have lost people close to them, partners or not.

A big part of fandom, and of just society, has no idea how to deal with grief, their own or others. It’s not a light conversation topic, it makes people feel awkward, or walk on eggshells around you, or tell you how they can’t possibly imagine having to go through that (btw, y'all don’t say this to people. About grief, or trauma, or disability or anything like that, just don’t. I’m begging you. And a rant about that kind of thing is for another day but... )

And then, when people inevitably face some form of major grief themselves, they feel ashamed for not handling it ‘right’.

It hurts, to try to find some acknowledgment of your grief, and only ever see stories that show just the first few weeks or months; the feeling of it never possibly being anything but constantly excruciating. Stories that end on ‘they were alone and sad and that is what their story, their love, will live on as; Tragic’. Or, that skip all the work and the doubt and the backsliding, and just show years down the road, when they’ve got a whole new life, and that grief, that love, is just a sad memory that they have ‘moved on’ from. Just a tiny trinket call back.

It feels impossible to survive, to ever be happy again, when you never see grief being treated as more than a tragic story point. And then, as you try your hardest to keep going, to process and heal, and connect to new people, while not forgetting the person you love, not letting them just become your tragic backstory, you see people gush over tragic love stories, over how romantic it is, over how characters loved each other so much they couldn’t live without them. (Thankfully a good bit of fandom seems to be pulling away from this, but it’s still common)

And, if that’s what it is to lose a partner, your soulmate… then… then how am I able to keep living? Even as painful as it is? If true love means not being able to live without the other person, does that mean I didn’t, I don’t, actually love them enough? Am I selfish for still actually wanting to live the rest of my life, even with this pain of the person I love being gone?

Would people read my, our, story and ‘enjoy’ it? Would they find this romantic? Would they scream over a prompt based on the worst event in my life, and have a good cry, and then move on, thinking how sad and beautifully tragically romantic that story would be? Would this person I love and miss more than anything, become just a Tragedy? Just an angsty sob story to gush about how wonderfully painful it was? Would it become about only my pain and heartbreak, and not about the cruelty of this other complete, unique, independent person who was robbed of their entire future?

Maybe that seems melodramatic or putting too much weight on tropes, or fandom. But remember.

Five years.

Zero real people saying ‘I’ve been there too’.

The only places I have seen my grief reflected (beyond a rare celebrity interview, or article) is in fiction, and mostly in fandom.

For over a decade I’ve seen people key smash and gush over angsty ships in fic and art, and I was one of them for a long time.

And then, when it became real life for me, all too often (not always, of course) people wouldn’t know how to handle my real grief. Even when I didn’t want to grieve, but wanted to remember all the reasons I love Emma. My real-life moments of ‘fluff’ that I cling to, become uncomfortable when they know the ‘angst’ to come.

And I don’t blame them. I’m not angry at them for not knowing what to say, for walking on eggshells. They’re not cruel for that, they’re not unsympathetic, it’s not that they just don��t try.

Because, if I’ve found so few real-world stories about this kind of grief, after looking so hard for so long, how can I expect them to have had much more luck?

If the only places I find stories about grief never focus on the reality of life after the funeral, and the process of not moving past, but learning to handle grief, then how can I expect broader fandom to know how to be comfortable around the ugly, boring, repetitive, not at all romantic parts of that grief?

Just, yes. Write, read, love your angst. But please just remember that ‘tragic love story’ happens to people, and while plenty of people might not want to read it because it’s just not their thing, or too depressing, there are those who see those dramatic prompt scenarios, and personally relate to them (I quite often say the events around Emma’s death read like a heavy-handed soap opera, or Queer Tragedy movie, and had had plenty of people agree, even before hearing all the details. And I have literally seen multiple prompts of ‘best friends secretly have feelings for each other, and then finally confess, only to get a short bit of happiness before one dies tragically’)

Write, read, love your angst, your tragic love stories, just please, be as respectful of grief (in any form, but this is mostly a shipping issue in my experience) as you would be (or should be) of other major trigger warnings. Gush and scream about the big dramatic ‘romantic’ tragedies, but don’t then ignore the raw, uncomfortable, vulnerable, cathartic explorations, or the real people dealing with real loss.

Because damn y’all, I’ve seen ‘I just love a good romantic tragedy trope, yes please rip my heart out’ said so many times, with the same tone as saying ‘That fake dating trope, that’s the good stuff’.

I’ve seen people gush over how much more interesting and beautifully cruel it is for young love to end tragically.

And I promise you. It’s not. It just fucking sucks. It’s not romantic or tragically beautiful or poignant. It’s devastating. And it goes on for so much longer than that last quarter of the story.

My grief is more than an angsty prompt. Our relationship, my love for her, is more than a dramatic sob story, more than just awkward sadness that kills the mood. Emma’s life, her memory, is more than my tragic backstory.

I want to be able to find my story in more than just fiction, I want to be able to get support from people who live with similar grief.

But I also want to see grief in fiction, in fandom, become more than a final character arc or Tragic love story; used for dramatic effect; grand and huge for a moment and then never fully processed, or mentioned again; just tragically romantic and heartbreaking and soooo good and angsty.

Grief is one of the only things we will all have to face throughout our lives.

I’m not just asking you to respect my grief or the grief of those around you. But your own future grief. I don’t want you to get there and feel like your grief is wrong, or means that you didn’t love someone ‘enough’ because it doesn’t manifest in a certain way.

Learning to accept grief; to be comfortable around raw, unpoetic, grief; to not hold up certain expressions of grief as Romantic or Poetic, but just honest, will eventually be personally useful for all of us, as much as I wish it wouldn’t.

I want my grief, everyone’s grief, to be seen, and understood, not just romanticized and dramatized.

My love story, Emma’s love story, isn’t beautifully tragic. It isn’t more interesting or poetic than a happy ending. The pain that I will carry with me for the rest of my life is not romantic.

But it is important.

#mine #my writing #tw #grief #death #car crash #fandom analysis #romantic tragedy trope

[angsty-nerd]

RNM 2X13 - Echo Download

I've been having a hard time trying to put my feelings about the Season 2 finale into words, so I've been sitting on it for a few days, reading everyone's metas, and trying to organize and separate my actual thinky thoughts from the angst and heartache. That… is not something I am particularly good at. But I'm trying.

I LOVE this show. The writing is a mess. There's plot holes all over the place. The pacing issues alone make me want to tear my hair out. And dear God do I want them to give these characters and relationships (including friendships) the time and space for the big moments to land properly. I don't know if we'll ever get any of that though. And in the meantime, I love these characters and the story, messes and all.

Everyone knows my biggest love is Echo, so I'm gonna start there.

"I don't know what you thought love was gonna be like when we were 17, but it's not all sunsets and horseback rides."

Back in the OG days, there was one consistent criticism I had with the way they wrote Max and Liz's story: the breakups always felt like bullshit. Max breaks up with Liz because she was afraid of some weird alien shit. Liz breaks up with Max because he's "supposed to be with Tess" and meanwhile he's like, "um… no?" We had "it's too dangerous" when it was dangerous regardless. "We're just different" but not in ways that actually mattered.

Echo's breakup mattered. There were issues and they were not dealing with them. Both of them were sneaking around behind the other's back. Neither was being fully honest with the other.

The unwavering honesty was something that stood out to me in S1. Yes, Max was hiding the truth about Rosa's death. But when it came to the present they were almost laughably open with each other. Liz didn't lie about it when Max asked if she told Kyle the truth. When Max asked what she was doing in the lab, she told him the truth. Once Liz knew the truth about Rosa, she knew everything. It seemed like with that truth out there was nothing left to hide. And once they got together they were a team. Immediately. There's a reason that we had a joking headcanon in the Echo world that they had their first kiss and then they were a married couple.

I really think Max's death not only put that to a screeching halt...it also put them on this path to the breakup. Liz has abandonment issues, and Max made a choice, without her, that resulted in him leaving her alone. It wasn't openly discussed in the depth that it should have been this season, but I really do think it was issue #1. Liz loves Max and she was very happy being with him...but after he came back from the dead she didn't trust him to not leave her again. It was an issue simmering under the surface from Episode 7 until the finale. Liz channeled it all into worrying about his heart, but the underlying theme was a resounding "I can't go through that again". Which is deeper than just the worry over a physical health problem. And it pushed Max away from her.

He grew irritable with her. He started hiding things from her and lying to her. The season just ended and I have no idea if he ever told her anything about his memory flashes! He was obsessively trying to learn about his past and never once discussed it with Liz!?? Because he didn't want her to stop him from using the serum? This is a HUGELY personal thing to Max and you can see how much it means to him. He had tears in his eyes while telling Isobel about it. I mean, that puppy dog excitement, and yet, he hides it all whenever Liz is around.

I think it was around episode 8 that we started talking about how badly they needed to have a big fight. Us -- the Echo shippers -- the ones who WANT them to be together -- were BEGGING them to fight. I hate conflict!! But the lack of honestly and the aversions were just building and building and I just wanted it all out on the table.

They finally STARTED having that fight in episode 11, but then Rosa and Isobel interrupted. In retrospect, sweet alien!Jesus, I wish they could have finished then. Maybe they would have gotten the air clear between them. Maybe it would have put them on a path to healing their relationship before the finale. But they didn't, so the breakup happened. And the thing is… that ending. It just kind of haunts me. Liz waiting and hoping for a grand gesture that never comes. I mean, did Max even know WHEN she was leaving!?! He sure didn't seem to have it on his mind when they flashed to him in that scene. And their fight...was all about what Liz was doing and Max not taking care of his heart. They never once touched on what he was trying to learn about his past. I'm pretty certain that Liz left without knowing any of that.

And the thing is… I'm sort of skirting around the meat of the issue here. Because the biggest problem of all of this was Liz violating Max by studying his biology without consent.

I really hate saying that in writing, because, to me, it's kind of the most horrible part of all of this.

Max Evans has been referred to in jest in this fandom as the King of Consent. He was so careful with Liz, tiptoeing around her looking for explicit consent in Season 1 until her desire for him was made abundantly clear. He only ignored the need for consent twice: both times in the S1 finale. Healing Michael's hand and healing Rosa. But those things both happened after he killed Noah. After he was high on his own power. They were very clearly set up as out of character for him.

Liz didn't give him the same respect. Consent does not just apply to sexual situations and healing. It applies to studying too. It applies to Liz USING Max's biology without his permission. It also applies to administering the cure to Steph without her consent. Liz was very, very wrong here.

And the thing is… it sure didn't seem like the writers saw it that way. It also didn't seem like JEANINE saw it that way. There's been a little bit more balanced quotes from them in interviews this week since the finale ended as far as saying that both Max and Liz were wrong, but they sure focused on Liz being incredible and strong before the finale aired.

The part that confuses me though...like, a LOT, is that the narrative was pretty clear that what Liz was doing was Bad and Wrong. She looked guilty. She was lying and hiding things from Max. And the MORAL COMPASS OF THE SHOW, Mr. Kyle Valenti, repeatedly told her she was wrong. Kyle called her out on her ethical violations even as he was thanking her for saving Steph.

Genoryx was set up as being bad. Liz herself refused to go work for them in the flashbacks because they were morally sketchy. Although, maybe that's the draw now that she is all full of ethical violations. Sigh.

I'm gonna leave this topic now, but I'll encourage you to go read @latessitrice's meta on the subject here:

Okay...so to sum this up? The breakup was coming. We knew it was coming. But it still hurt my heart so much. I haven't seen anyone gif Jeanine's performance of the "I am in love with you. And I hate that right now." But the delivery of that line broke me.

That being said...do I see it being over? Let's give that a resounding FUCK, NO. I mean, sure, they fought. And it hurt. And Liz ran away. Without saying goodbye. And all of that SHATTERED ME.

But...they still love each other even if they both have a lot to work on individually. That’s part of what MADE it so hard.

I am actually stoked for season 3. Two Maxes? All of the delicious angst once Liz gets home. Liz not knowing there's two Maxes and meeting Jones first and not knowing who he is and being vulnerable to his mindfuckery? Or just his fuckery in general. Whatever. I am here for it.

I am here for Liz discovering that something about Genoryx is Not Right. I'm here for her living a normal life and getting drawn back into the madness. I'm here for Max getting more powerful and more alieny under Jones's guidance. And I am here for what I am certain will be an epic reunion once they are back together again.

As a last more positive comment...I’m stoked that we get to have both Max and Liz alive and facing interesting potential storylines this hiatus. All I wanted from this finale, in truth, was to leave the characters in a place that inspired me to want to write for them for the next year plus or however long this COVID-extended hiatus ends up being. And I am so excited for that.

And I have talked enough now that I will go ahead and post this and leave this post as my Echo Takeaways from the finale. I'll be back again with some more gen/bigger picture thoughts later.

#roswell new mexico #rnm season 2 #rnm echo #max&liz #max evans #liz ortecho #ogroswell #feeling the feels #ouch my heart #rnm echo meta #my meta

[aceofwhump]

Hi! I read your post about ace characters in media and since it's ace week I just wanted to say it's so important for asexuality to have representation. Parvati from the Outer Worlds game is the first character I saw in media who was ace, who talked about what it meant to her and how it felt. That game was my 'holy sh*t' moment, where so many pieces fell into place so I could understand myself a bit more. It needs to be more commonly discussed and shown for the sake of all other ace peeps too.

I COULD NOT AGREE MORE!!!!!

Representation is so important!!! Everyone should be able to see themselves in media and we are no different. It gives you a sense of happiness and validation to see yourself in a character that is seen by thousands. Be it a video game, a book, or a tv show. There's nothing quite like seeing someone say they're ace. It's an amazing feeling.

And proper representation also helps bring awareness and information about asexuality to those who might never have heard about it or only know inaccurate things about it.

How you felt about Parvati is similar to how I feel about Jughead Jones. I was indifferent about the Archie and Jughead comics until the Chip Zdarsky run started and I found out that he actually says he's asexual. Before Jughead all I had to look to for rep were characters like Sheldon Cooper and BBCs Sherlock. Characters who were never canon ace, just fanon, and were mean, emotionless, hated characters. Then Jughead comes out and I finally see myself in media! And the comic series continues to address his asexuality and touch aversion and aromanticism!! It was treated with respect and normalcy and I feel such a connection to Jughead. Jughead Jones makes me so happy. Which is why I won’t watch or touch R**erdale. Not after what they’ve done with Jughead. To take my aroace rep and straightwash him....It hurts me.

But yes I wholeheartedly agree about the importance of asexual representation in the media!! It’s why I get so excited whenever we get a new one like with Caduceus Clay from Critical Role who came out yesterday :D And I’m so glad you’ve been able to connect and see yourself in a character! From what I’ve seen of her, Parvati is amazing :D

#mod replies #ask #mod post #anon #asexual awareness week #ace week #asexual characters #asexual representation #asexual #Anonymous

[syrupwit]

Letter for Chocolate Box 2021

-

Hello there, and welcome to my letter for Chocolate Box Exchange 2021! I appreciate that you’ve taken the time to read this letter. I hope that it will provide you with clarification, inspiration, or at the very least a bit of entertainment.

I have requested fic only for all items below. Although I’ve written more for some sections and less for others, rest assured that I would be thrilled to receive a gift for any of the requested fandoms or relationships. 

Please see the table of contents below:

Likes

Do Not Want (DNW)

Fandom: The Magnus Archives

Fandom: Planescape: Torment

Fandom: Stellar Firma

-

LIKES

My general/SFW likes include: 

Surreality and weirdness

Character studies

Lore and worldbuilding

Humor and comedy, especially dark comedy

Psychological, paranormal, and cosmic horror

Stories-within-a-story

Unreliable narrators

Unusual team-ups

Dramatic rescues

Canon divergence AUs

Unconventional formats

My smut/NSFW likes include:

First times

Awkwardness

Characters being super into each other, especially if one or both of them are conventionally unattractive

Jealousy

Xeno

Humiliation with a male sub

Tease and denial

Orgasm delay; also orgasm denial

Dominant bottoms

Mutual dubcon/noncon, or dubcon where the dubconned party enjoys it

I have a very long list of fic likes here.

-

DO NOT WANT (DNW)

Characters under age 16 involved in sexual situations

Sex without mutual attraction

Hate speech or hate crimes (discussions/mentions of bigotry are fine)

Harm to animals (the existence of ghost animals is OK, and it’s fine to mention animals that have canonically died, but I don’t want to hear about injury, abuse, or noncanonical death of animals)

Bestiality

Scat

Necrophilia (sexual activity involving ghosts or sentient skeletons/undead is OK, just not inanimate corpses or remains)

Sexual activity involving worms / spiders / insects

-

THE MAGNUS ARCHIVES

Requested Ships: Adelard Dekker/Gertrude Robinson, Agnes Montague/Gertrude Robinson, Evan Lukas/Naomi Herne, Gerard Keay/Tim Stoker, Harriet Fairchild & Simon Fairchild

One of my favorite pieces of horror media! <3 I’ve requested mostly rarepairs for this exchange. Please don’t look to the amount I’ve written to gauge how much I want one pairing over another -- I want all these things equally and would be happy with any of them.

Adelard Dekker/Gertrude Robinson

The respect, rapport, and humor between these two is palpable in the text of Dekker’s statements and the way Gertrude talks about him. She was still holding onto his plans to disrupt rituals after he presumably died. I’d love to know more about their working relationship, the foes they faced, and whatever’s going on with Dekker’s relationship to the Web. Extinction!Dekker would also be awesome.

If you want to get into Dekker’s faith versus Gertrude’s lack-of, please do! I’m really interested in the way that religion/faith functions in a world like TMA’s, and I love conflicts between characters where neither “side” is cast as “right” by the narrative but it’s clear why everyone believes the things they do. But if you’re not interested in touching on this topic, no worries.

Agnes Montague/Gertrude Robinson

Star-crossed as hell. I refuse to believe that they only met once, or that they were entirely somber and fateful and dutiful about it. imo Gertrude generally comes off as contemptuous or irreverent about other entities and avatars, but she seems to reserve a certain respect for Agnes. Agnes... I’d just like to know more about Agnes.

I’d love to hear about their history: how their metaphysical bond works in daily life, the encounters or near misses they’ve had over the decades, the ways they’ve helped or foiled each other from a distance. I would especially love some outsider POV, whether it’s Gertrude receiving statements about Agnes, Agnes hearing of Gertrude’s exploits secondhand, or a third party perceiving a meeting between them. A statement directly from Agnes could also be awesome.

I’d love any AU where they have to work more closely together, as well -- be it canon divergence, or a setting AU like vampire/vampire hunter. (Oooh. Buffyverse AU with Gertrude as a Watcher and Agnes as the leader of the vampire cult that killed her latest Slayer, y/n?)

Evan Lukas/Naomi Herne

“Alone” was one of the first episodes in the podcast that really got me, and the image of Naomi running between those open graves is still striking. I feel terrible for Evan and am so curious about his fate. I’d love to hear more about their relationship, anything that might have happened to Naomi post-Eyepocalypse, or an AU where Naomi rescues Evan from the Lonely or vice versa.

Gerard Keay/Tim Stoker

These two have never met on-air, but I think they’d really get along. They’re both quick, driven, given to quips and reasoned action, and possessed of tragic backstories. Whether they meet somehow pre-canon, Tim finds Gerry’s book in the time between Jon’s return from America and the Unknowing, or there’s a full AU scenario, I would love to see them interact. I think there could be some interesting tension around Gerry’s decision to consciously align himself with the Eye versus Tim’s unwilling conscription, and the ways their family histories have forced them into contact with the supernatural.

Harriet Fairchild & Simon Fairchild

Harriet Fairchild is a one-episode background character with barely a handful of third-hand lines, but I’m very intrigued by her. Simon is a sparkling example of Affable Evil and I would enjoy reading more about his philosophy and relationships with others. I’m interested in the family dynasties connected to the entities and just kind of want to know more.

What are the Fairchilds, and how do they create new family members? Who was Harriet before she became a Fairchild? How does she conceive of the Vast, and what is her attraction to it (or aversion-turned-attraction)? Who is Simon to her -- teacher, tormentor-turned-teacher, evil father figure -- and how do they agree and diverge on how best to serve their patron? I really love explorations of avatars’ different relationships with their respective entities, so I would adore something about that. 

Some things that particularly compel me about the Vast: the image and name of the Falling Titan, freedom in nihilism, the comfort of insignificance, call of the void, oceans / storms / cliffs, space, scales of size so large they’re not humanly comprehensible, love for the sky, adrenaline and excitement, hollowness / emptiness, unusual manifestations, alliances and rivalries with other powers.

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PLANESCAPE: TORMENT

Requested Ships: Annah-of-the-Shadows & Fall-from-Grace, Annah-of-the-Shadows/Fall-from-Grace, Morte & The Nameless One, Morte/The Nameless One

I completed this game for the first time in fall 2020 and enjoyed the hell out of it. I’ve only played through twice, and I haven’t explored all the routes or possible encounters; please excuse the current gaps and mistakes in my canon knowledge!

Annah-of-the-Shadows & Fall-from-Grace | Annah-of-the-Shadows/Fall-from-Grace

I fell for Annah because of her voice acting (the affectionate wryness! the ill-concealed vulnerability!), and Grace because I love older female characters whose stoic or gracious exteriors conceal fortresses of discipline. While I’m not in love with the way women are written in Planescape: Torment, I really like both these specific characters and crave more interactions between them. Their relationship has a great deal of tension with no real resolution, and they have an interesting mix of similarities and contrasts. I think there are some fascinating possibilities to explore with them, whether platonically or romantically. 

Annah mistrusts and is jealous of Grace. Meanwhile, Grace seems disappointed when Annah rejects her friendly overtures, and repeatedly shows protectiveness towards her. (What does Grace see in Annah, besides a romantic rival or just a younger woman who doesn’t like her? If they had met earlier, how would Grace have tried to cultivate her?) Annah is hotheaded and ruled by emotion, while Grace keeps her arguably more tumultuous feelings under rigid control. Then Annah’s implied discomfort with her heritage as a tiefling, and Grace’s turmoil over her identity and past trauma as a tanar’ri, are another potentially exploitable source of conflict. 

I’d love something about a bonding attempt on Grace’s part gone awry -- does it get criminal? Unexpectedly dangerous? Uncomfortably sexy? An exploration of how they deal with things post-ending (any ending), or just everyday interactions with the citizens and environment of Sigil, would also be awesome. Hurt/comfort, too -- maybe something where Annah is trying to be stoic while Grace heals her, or a situation where Annah has to take care of Grace and is super out of her element? Or maybe Annah gets mazed somehow, and is shocked when Grace shows up to rescue her? These are all merely suggestions though. 

Morte & The Nameless One | Morte/The Nameless One

One of the most complicated relationships in the game, and also (in my opinion) the most intriguing. I’m really interested in Morte’s loyalty to the Nameless One and the way his guilt intersects with and fuels it. They have such a long, twisted history, and the player’s decisions can put so many different spins on it. I’d really love anything about them, shippy or gen. (I would prefer that the focus be kept off their romantic/sexual relationships with women or aspirations toward the same, particularly the sexually harassing comments.)

I’m a massive, massive sucker for comic relief characters encountering serious/dark situations, so I would love anything with Morte in that vein, whether it’s one of his canonical moments of peril (getting stolen by Lothar! potentially being traded to the Pillar of Skulls!) or a new situation. A past incarnation of the Nameless One could also provide the peril. Their relationship has gone through near infinite iterations -- there’s so much to exploit there, and so much opportunity for angst on Morte’s part (and pining, if you want to go in a shippy direction). 

Further prompts… Hmm. I’d love something that explores the world of Planescape in general and Sigil in particular; I’m particularly fond of the mortuary, the catacombs, and UnderSigil. It’d also be cool to see their first meeting after the “best” ending of the game (where the Nameless One finally dies and goes off to join the Blood War). On the whole, though, anything where these two are together and bantering would be lovely!

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STELLAR FIRMA

Requested Ships: David 7/Trexel Geistman, Trexel Geistman/Hartro Piltz, Number 1/Number 48, David 7 & Trexel Geistman & Hartro Piltz, David 7/Trexel Geistman/Hartro Piltz

It’s difficult to express how much I love this podcast, but rest assured I really, really do. It has been described as a cross between Brazil and The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, and this strikes me as accurate. I love how the tone is at once exuberantly silly, but also dark and horrifying, in a way that doesn’t try to hammer listeners over the head with its irony. It would be hard not to delight me with any fic about the requested gen relationship and ships.

David 7/Trexel Geistman

I didn’t actually ship these two until I wrote 10k+ words of them talking. Then Season 3 came along, and, well, I LOVE THEM. They’re so fun together, and I love the gradual development of their not-quite-friendship -- those few, short moments of genuine connection, that contrast all the more with Trexel’s everyday self-absorbed cruelty and the oppressive horror of David’s situation.

The potential for jealousy and unrequited pining on Trexel’s part here is particularly delicious. (I would be totally cool with unrequited Trexel->David for this request, by the way.) However, I also love the idea of David realizing, with creeping horror, that he has feelings for Trexel, or that he returns Trexel’s no doubt inconvenient and poorly expressed affections. Imagine the songs they would sing.

In terms of prompts… I really loved the in-universe coffee shop setup; something about their time there, or an AU where they get to stay longer, would be lovely. Playing with tropes could be fantastic -- soulmate/soulbond AUs, arranged marriage, bodyswap, amnesia, wingfic, time loops, fake dating, hurt/comfort, one character being assumed dead when they aren’t (and then it makes the other character realize their feelings, oh no). I’d also really love angst, centered around pining or not. I think some terribly painful things could be done with these characters, and I’d love to read them.

Trexel Geistman/Hartro Piltz

I fell hard for this ship right about when Hartro made Trexel drink clone slurry in Episode 5. I love how much fun she has terrorizing him, how he just has to take it, and how he both fears her and scrambles for her attention. (NB: I am 100% unironically into the foot thing, so feel free to do whatever you’d like with that, including nothing.)

I love what a disaster Hartro is. It’s not her fault that she was assigned to Trexel -- he could drive anyone mad -- but she lets her hatred of him goad her into making terrible decisions. At the same time, as a nonnie on FFA expressed a while ago, it seems like she gets more out of the relationship than she wants to confront or acknowledge. On Trexel’s end, Hartro seems to demonstrate the exact sort of mix of “come here” and “get away from me” that captures his attention.

Kink is baked into this ship, so I’ll try to be shameless about requesting it. I was perhaps overly gratified when Trexel was canonically stated to be a masochist (he likes getting shock-collared! and possibly stepped on!). I’d love anything that goes even further with their canon dynamic -- D/s, punishment, bondage; humiliation, degradation, the foot thing; maybe dubcon with a pre-canon Hartro taking out her frustrations on Trexel, or some sort of incredibly messed up corporate training exercise. 

Explicit kinky content is far from my only interest here, though -- I’d also love romance, a lower-rated exploration of UST, or something that examines their relationship without getting into kink or sex at all. This is one of those ships where, if you make them hold hands in a certain way, hearts will spontaneously explode in my eyes. Just a fact.

Number 1/Number 48

Standards! So sinister. What’s up with them, anyway? How did they meet and agree to file relationship paperwork together? What are their couples counseling sessions with Dr. Krell like? What were the most egregiously vague pronouncements that Number 1 made pre-canon, and what other work assignments have impacted their personal lives and forced them to cancel reservations? ...How did Number 48 get the murder hammer? 

Since these two are, I believe, the highest-ranking members of Stellar Firma to have appeared in the podcast so far, I’d love something about their interactions with other higher-up types or silly protocols or general Brazil-type bureaucratic madness. If there are ominous promises and disturbing implications packaged in crisp business jargon, all the better. 

David 7 & Trexel Geistman & Hartro Piltz | David 7/Trexel Geistman/Hartro Piltz

So, I love these characters and the way they interact. I love that they’re all dramatic and ridiculous in their own ways, and that no one is strictly the straight man or the comic relief (though Trexel does come close to the latter). 

Gen-wise, these three seeing a common goal through together would be delightful, whether it’s something small or grand-scale or completely imaginary. Something science fiction-y, or crossover with another genre like horror or film noir, could be really fun. Additionally, the episode where they all play a TTRPG is one of my favorites -- I’d love something else about them playing a game together or otherwise letting Hartro explore her passion for elaborate props and scenarios. 

Ship-wise, I’ve already talked about why I love David/Trexel and Hartro/Trexel. For David and Hartro, I like that they’re able to have a polite, semi-reasonable conversation, but I was also intrigued by the hint of antagonism in Episode 55, with the angry staring and pointed bed-sitting. I tend to read David as either gay or bi with a heavy preference for men, but I could absolutely get into some David/Hartro rather than a V relationship for this OT3. In terms of shippy prompts, I’m interested in seeing them navigate the same scenarios as in gen, but I would also love some messed up three-person corporate training exercises if you’d like to go that route.

#optional detailed letters for exchanges tag

[echodrops]

Hshshsnansna seeing that ask got me in a HUGE HaaH mood. Like, I went through and read a bunch of asks, and I'd probably go reread the fic itself if I had time. So!! Is there anything about HaaH you've always wanted to share but never had the chance to? Headcanons, worldbuilding, backstory, hidden details- anything at all??

Oh friend… There is so much. I have a Word document that’s like 17k of JUST headcanons and world-building for this fic kghsdkjhdkfg I’m not crazy, I swear.

It took me a while to respond because I had to comb through and find stuff that wasn’t spoilery, but tada, have some Home and a Half Hunk and Shiro (and Matt) headcanons and backstory under the cut!

Also, as for hidden details… Same as the Garrison professors in the show were named for staff members, Neuhahn and Ania are named after IRL contributors to the Voltron animated series–Chris Neuhahn was a producer and Ania O’Hare was the casting director.

And here are some Hunk, Shiro, and sorta Matt headcanons/backstory that shapes their characters in HaaH. (Please note, these headcanons ignore absolutely everything from about season 6 of the actual show and on. I stopped watching Voltron after Season 6 because I just couldn’t handle the writing anymore. T_T)

Hunk:- He’s mixed ethnically, and although his parents are from Samoa, his family tree actually spans many different countries, mostly in Polynesia, including Tonga, but even places as far away as Malaysia.- His parents were converted to the LDS church by Mormon missionaries in Samoa. A few years before Hunk was born, his parents moved to Utah to be closer to the church, so Hunk has only ever been to Samoa once, on a vacation to visit family.- His first name is actually “Hyrum,” and until he met Lance at a Garrison-sponsored summer astro-camp when they were nine, everyone just called him by his real name.- Lance actually meant to call him “Incredible Hulk” at camp, butttt to nine-year-old Lance’s utter mortification, it came out “Incredible Hunk” instead. “Hunk” stuck.- He has a little sister who is even more sensitive than he is.

- Although Hunk’s parents originally agreed on the plan to move to America, after the family arrived, they experienced difficulty fitting in with the very selective Utah culture, and Hunk’s mother grew disenchanted with the church. Employment was difficult to find in their small, rural town, and Hunk’s parents both struggled with being isolated from their extended families. Tensions over whether or not to remain in America, as well as over money, led to some miserable fights that contributed to Hunk’s aversion to conflict when he was younger.

- Hunk sometimes had to play the role of family peacekeeper, working hard to make sure that his youngest sister wouldn’t notice the strain.

- Nevertheless, despite their share of troubles, the family is extremely close-knit. Hunk values his family and their opinions more than anything in any world.

- Which is how he ended up agreeing to go to Garrison, even when he really just wanted to help his parents kickstart the restaurant they were planning to open. His mother felt that working in a family restaurant, even if Hunk is a great cook, would squander his incredible academic and engineering talent (which Hunk thought of as just a hobby), so she begged him to go and continue his schooling instead. Hunk couldn’t say no to his mother, even if the thought of being shipped off into space terrified the living daylights out of him.

- Hunk doesn’t curse and is somewhat uncomfortable with people cursing, at least in front of him. Although Lance used to have a pretty colorful repertoire, when he learned that cursing made Hunk uncomfortable, he immediately adopted all of Hunk’s weird Utah replacements instead. “Holy crow” and “let’s kick some trash” are things they actually say seriously.

- Hunk is always down to cuddle and is never embarrassed by asking for or giving cuddles to anyone. He would 200% cuddle Shiro if he thought Shiro would let him. (Shiro would, in fact, let him.) Hunk’s favorite person on the team to cuddle is actually Keith, because Keith (who was taught to comply by Garrison scientists with all unexpected/unsolicited touch) will just sit obediently for hours letting Hunk hug out all his stress. Hunk knows that something is off about Keith’s behavior, but his leading theory—that Keith allows the hugs because he’s touch-starved—is unfortunately false.

- Hunk knows the lyrics to every Disney song EVER.

- And he’s like a dog with a bone when it comes to secrets. Once he discovers that someone’s keeping something under wraps, he goes a bit crazy with curiosity and cannot stop thinking about what they might be hiding. The rules of privacy go totally out the window when he gets like this, but time and again, Hunk’s adage that it’s always better to tell the truth bears itself out.

  Shiro (and Matt?):

- Shiro is the only member of his immediate family whose first language was not Japanese. His grandparents on both sides immigrated to the US from Japan due to work transfers relatively late in life, when their own children, Shiro’s parents, were already young adults. As the first family child to be born in America, Shiro’s parents strongly emphasized the need to learn English well, which unfortunately resulted in Shiro being pushed away from learning Japanese when he was young. Even though he’s a capable conversationalist now, he’s struggled his whole life with regret over not learning the language when he was young and could have picked it up easier.  

- There’s a running joke in his family that he’s actually an ogre in disguise, given that he is much taller than many of his other family members. Tradition demands that the first photo of every holiday gathering is a joke group shot in which Shiro’s posed so his entire head is outside the top frame of the picture.

- Shiro was mercilessly bullied as a child because of his height. The other children frequently suggested that he didn’t belong in their grade because he was too big and that the school must held him back multiple times for being dumb. (Shiro was never held back. In fact, he had excellent grades from kindergarten to the day he graduated from Garrison—and no, not because his parents forced him to study; in fact, throughout his schooling, they often ended up having to force Shiro to go to bed already instead.)

- On top of being teased for his looks, Shiro was naturally shy. He barely spoke, even to his teachers, and would stumble miserably if he was put on the spot in class, contributing further to the rumor that he was stupid.

- Shiro loved learning, but he hated everything that happened in school and didn’t have a single real friend outside of his cousins until he went off to middle school and met Matt Holt in sixth grade.

- Barely two weeks into their first middle school year, and it was already obvious that Matt was the school’s biggest nerd; he’d been bumped up two grades because of his obvious genius and was the textbook definition of an alien conspiracy theorist (It’s not a conspiracy if they’re REAL, guys!) But the strange thing was that no one bullied Matt—he was just so quick on the sarcastic (and biochemical) comebacks that teasing him wasn’t even worth it. Instead, the school’s resident assholes took it out on targets a little less likely to corrode their homework with miniature magnesium bombs—read as, they picked on polite, well-meaning Takashi Shirogane instead.

- Out of pity more than anything else, Matt finally stood up for Shiro one day and ran off the assholes. (It was not, as Mrs. Shirogane insists, with a home-made taser. It was not.) After something like that, well… You sort of feel obligated to befriend a guy, don’tcha?

- Becoming friends with Matt Holt transformed Shiro’s life. Even if Shiro wouldn’t originally speak up for himself, he was ferociously proud and supportive of his first real friend, and learning to be bold for Matt taught Shiro the value and meaning of standing up for not only others, but also himself. Being friends with someone as off-the-cuff and tricky as Matt helped Shiro grow more spontaneous, less self-conscious, and ultimately much more confident—even if, to this day, most of that confidence is still focused on helping others, rather than on being self-assured.

- It was Shiro admiration for Matt’s father, Sam Holt, that led Shiro to take his childhood obsession with military history a step further by actually joining the military. Shiro and Matt enrolled in Garrison together, although Matt was part of the research rather than the combat division.

- Matt was the one who convinced Shiro to get his hair styled in an undercut. It was originally just a dare, but Shiro ended up loving it afterward. The “Undercut Incident,” as it has come to be known in the Shirogane family, was the official straw that broke the camel’s back and resulted in Mrs. Shirogane declaring Matt Holt a “bad influence,” the only impact of which was that Matt had to sneak in through Shiro’s bedroom window instead of coming to the front door when he wanted to hang out.  

- Shiro has received two separate Medals of Honor for making dangerous supply deliveries to war-torn countries across the globe, delivering the vital food and medicine that helped save hundreds of lives. He has also been part of several missions to save stranded astronauts from failing international space stations.

- Shiro is actually a giant memelord, but his crushing sense of responsibility keeps him from indulging in quality shitposting in front of anyone he actually knows. He had a ridiculously active secret Vine account before leaving on the Kerberos mission. His snaps are legendary. Deep down, Shiro dreads the inevitable day someone connects him with his cringey social media accounts.

- Literally the worst at adulting. His mom still filled out his tax forms for him and booked his dentist appointments. He has no idea what the hell he’s doing leading Team Voltron when he can’t even remember which of his clothes are machine-washable and which aren’t.

- When they were in their third year at Garrison, Matt conned Shiro into volunteering as a camp counselor for Garrison’s summer astrocamp program, even though Shiro had minimal understanding of how to take care of children and mostly just BS’d his way through, hoping that none of his campers had anything close to a serious issue.

- He won “best camp counselor” the very first year he volunteered. Mostly because Lance cheated and voted for him 23 times, but still.

#Home and a Half #HaaHVLD #voltron headcanons #Hunk headcanons #Shiro headcanons #Matt headcanons #I guess lol #matt holt #hunk voltron #takashi shirogane #Voltron

[tiredoftheroutine]

Hey, 5 and 6 for the aro ask game 😀

I’m so sorry this took so long, I never got a notification for it!

5: Am I romance positive, repulsed, or indifferent.

First off, I have problems with this language. Most of the aspec community agrees that romance/sex positive and romance/sex favorable are two very separate things, so the question should really say romance favorable. I am romance and sex positive: I don’t care what other people do as long as it is consensual (have as much unmarried sex as you want). I am not romance and sex favorable: I do not want romance or sex for myself and do not seek it out in media.

The older I get, the more romance averse I get, which is between repulsed and indifferent, especially when it comes to seeing it in media. I have never cared to be in a relationship. They seem like so much effort, and I honestly can’t understand how alloromantics can spend their entire adult life living with the same person or put aside their wants and goals for someone else, especially as a young adult. I don’t understand wanting to be with someone that much.

Romance in media didn’t used to bother me as much as it does today. I was fine watching shows with romance and listening to songs about love, but now I’m just annoyed by it all, especially straight white couples. It’s all been done, there is nothing new there. When I’m streaming online, I tend to skip over romance plots altogether. I especially hate shows where EVERY character always has a romance storyline (The Bold Type comes to mind specifically the most recent season). I have stopped reading books because I got annoyed by the main love story. I specifically look for artists that don’t sing about love often. It’s not relatable to me. Now, of course, this doesn’t mean I think all media has to be relatable to me specifically. Representation matters. I am all here for healthy gay ships. However, I cannot name a single canon aromantic character in main stream media. Jughead Jones in the comics, yes, but they erased it in the show; all the well-known asexual characters (three come to mind, and one of those they never actually said asexual) have relationships; and any time there is a character who sleeps around, they are framed as a bad guy or are “magically changed when they meet that special someone and settle down” (as someone who is also ace, I can’t even imagine how harmful this is to alloaros). At this point, I’m just happy when a main character doesn’t end up in a relationship at the end of a show and it’s not shown as tragic.

For those interested, the Sounds Fake But Okay podcast just did an episode on the favorable-repulsed spectrum which goes more into the differences between favorable/positive and averse/repulsed. Also, I don’t have the link handy, but there is a database/spreadsheet of almost all aspec representation throughout all media. While this means that there is arospec representation out there, someone would first have to know aromanticism exists, and then randomly see the link or find someone who knows about it, and as far as I can tell, it isn’t common knowledge even within the community. 

Edit: I don’t think this is the database I was thinking of, I have a distinct memory of it being a google spreadsheet or excel file, but here is a great post with databases at the end!

6: How do you feel about general intimacy?

Not a fan; physical touch is at the very bottom of my love languages. I will cuddle with cats and that is all. Occasionally I’ll be okay with hugs, but I don’t like when they’re forced on me. I have a friend who knows I’m touch averse, still tries to hug me, and will joke how me not wanting a hug from them is transphobic. I also hate the sound of kissing, which I didn’t realize until I lived with a couple whos kisses where loud and sounded very wet.

#aromantic ask game #romance averse #aromantic #arospec