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key201303 · 3 years

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Pairing: badboy!Chani x fem!reader ft. Jaeyoon as your ex-boyfriend

Word count: 3660 words

Warnings: smut, swearing, dirty talk, use of the petname ‘baby’, unprotected sex, semi-public make out, slightly chocking, mentions of smoking and cigarettes, slight drunk sex, slight pleading kink, a bit of teasing

Genre: smut, friends to lovers AU

Plot: You have been locked in your apartment for days, binging all kinds of movies and a bucket of ice-cream your best friend got you after the terrible breakup you had to go through in the past few days after finding out your boyfriend was cheating on you with his best friend. But a message from Chani will be the saviour to your sanity, or maybe it would make you lose it. But, will you be loved too fast or does he really has feelings for you?

Taglist -> @staysstrays @offmymindmp3 (let me know if you want me to add you!)

Special thanks -> @offmymindmp3 for revealing the amazing information of Chani having a motorcycle license and giving me the idea of writing this 😈🙏🏻❤

"(Y/N) it has already been a day and the only thing you've done is eat ice cream. You should go out and get some fresh air." You heard your friend's voice through your phone speaker. You knew she was probably right, but the last thing you wanted was to go outside and find face to face with the reason for your never ending nightmare. "I'm okay here, don't worry." You said with a cold tone, trying to hide the tears that were forming in the corner of your eyes once again. All you wanted to do was cuddle into a blanket and a random plushie you could find in your small apartment and eat ice cream until your stomach exploded due to the amount of snacks you ate. You could tell this was the worst feeling you will ever suffer and, now, you could finally understand what people meant by having a broken heart.

"I gotta go, I'll take a shower and watch some Netflix." You tiredly announced to your friend who was quietly waiting for you to tell her that you would do something else to keep your mind away from the asshole that cheated on you with his best friend. "Okay… if you need anything you already know where to find me." She said, still worried about you. And with a soft 'hm' letting her know you would contact her in case you felt worse, you hung up the phone and threw it into the soft covers of your bed, throwing yourself into them as well right after.

What have I done to deserve this? You asked yourself, lifting your head to face a photo that hung on the wall next to your bed. It was a photo you took on your best friend's birthday. You remembered that day really fondly, wishing you could repeat those moments but now without the boy that took your heart and destroyed it. But suddenly, your eyes moved to another photo that hung next to the other. It was a pic of you and Chani the day you both graduated in high school. Nobody has ever understood your friendship, especially because of Chani's personality. He was that kind of boy that would give a bad boy vibe wherever he went. A vibe that never fitted yours, that was why nobody could understand your close relationship. What people didn't know was that you have been friends since forever, always been there for each other no matter what.

Soon, a nostalgic feeling hit your heart like a rock. Ever since you started dating your ex, he banned you from going out with Chani because he said he was a 'bad influence'. You actually missed going out with him, you missed his motorcycle rides at midnight. For God's sake, you even missed the cigarettes you shared back in those days when you both used to mess around. After all, you weren't that different from each other. You were just using a perfect mask while being Jaeyoon's girlfriend.

After shedding some more tears, you decided it was time for you to lay on your bed with your computer and start watching that movie Chani once recommended to you in one of the multiple midnight talks you secretly had through chat. You settled down a bowl of popcorn, some random snacks that have been living rent free in your pantry for the last month and a bucket of your favorite ice-cream to drown your sorrows.

As soon as the movie started, you could tell it was totally Chani's style. Action mixed with some good drama typical of the usual gossip from a small town. You have always mocked him a lot because of how much he enjoyed good gossip. You couldn't help smiling at the thought of him suddenly. Maybe it was the sadness you felt after breaking up with Jaeyoon or maybe it was the crush you always had in Chani that was flowering again like a rose during spring, but your heart beated in a different way now that you kept repeating his name like a mantra in your head. And just like if you have been trying to invoke him, the screen of your phone lit up with a notification from his chat room.

Idiot ☠️🚬: "What are you doing?"

You: "Watching the movie you recommended."

Idiot ☠️🚬: "I thought you said you would never again watch a movie I recommended 🙄."

You: "What do you want, Chani?"

Idiot ☠️🚬: "I have an empty space on my motorcycle and a free cigarette, wanna join? 😈"

You: "You know I quitted that world a long time ago."

Idiot ☠️🚬: "I know what happened with Jaeyoon, you don't have to keep lying."

Idiot ☠️🚬: "C'mon, do it for the old times 😈🔥."

You: "Fine."

Idiot ☠️🚬: "That's my girl 😘❣️."

You decided to not answer that last message. What were you supposed to answer to the boy that once was your crush when he calls you his girl? There's no answer you could think that could be good enough. But soon, another message appears in the chatroom.

Idiot ☠️🚬: "Are you coming or do I have to sneak into your house and get you out of bed?"

Reading that message and knowing Chani was not the type of person who enjoys the wait, you grab a sweater and got out of your apartment. And as soon as you finished going down the long stairs and crossed the door that separated your building from the cold street, you saw him, wearing his usual leather jacket and ready to start your sudden journey. "Finally, I thought I would have to go up and take you out by myself. Not like I would complain though." He said with a teasing voice and a cocky smile. You always got really frustrated when he flirted with you like that because you never knew if he was being serious or if he was messing around. You always believed the second option but deeply inside your heart, you wished it was the first option, noticing how your crush on him has never disappeared. Not even when you were dating Jaeyoon.

"Hug me tight baby, now you don't have that annoying boyfriend that forbids you to be with me." He said winking at you while giving you the helmet you used to wear before dating Jaeyoon. You answered a quiet 'thank you' while taking the helmet from his hands and trying so hard to hide your burning cheeks at his words. Just like he said, as soon as you got on his motorcycle, your arms immediately wrapped around his torso, perfectly feeling his toned body. You could tell that he has been working out lately. "Ready?" He said, turning his face a little to see your expression. You just nodded and avoided his gaze, still feeling shy for the closeness of your body with his.

The ride was relieving, like an energy boost. The streets were beautifully decorated with the street lights mixed with the lights from the shops and buildings, the cold air dancing with your soft hair making a mess on it and a beautiful ocean of stars blinking in the dark vault above your heads. "Is there any place you wanna go?" Chani said, knocking you out of your thoughts as he reduced the speed due to a red traffic light. "Anywhere where I can forget about everything." You answered, sighing, finally becoming the (Y/N) Chani knew. "You sounded so emo." He said laughing, making you laugh as well. But just like you wished, he took you to a place you remembered fondly and that has been ages since the last time you could go there.

The beautiful park where you both shared your first cigarette has remained exactly the same as it was back then. It felt like years didn’t pass through it. Even the beautiful garden where you both once danced under the rain while being drunk remained intact. Even the arbor where you accidentally shared a beautiful kiss remained intact. You wished your feelings remained as intact as the place but for some reason, you were convinced that Chani would never have such feelings for someone like you. At least not after seeing the person you became while dating Jaeyoon.

“If you don’t want to smoke it's fine, but I’m going to light a cigarette for me.” Chani said, removing his helmet and already taking out the pack of cigarettes from his jacket pocket. “Why wouldn’t I want to?” You said, taking his cigarettes between your fingers and placing it in your mouth, waiting for him to light it for you. His eyes widened at your sudden move, making his heart flutter like it used to do back in those days when you shared a cigarette. “Wow, I see you’re wilding baby. I missed this (Y/N).” Chani said, taking out the lighter you gifted him when you both graduated and getting closer to you to light the cigarette. “I see you still use the same lighter.” You said, looking into his eyes as he lit the cigarette, piercing his soul with your fierce eyes, trying to ignore the fact that he called you baby. “How could I drop the lighter my favorite girl gifted me.” He said, taking the cigarette from your lips and taking a deep breath, inhaling the delicious smoke. “What happened with that asshole?” Chani asked, blowing the smoke out softly. You missed inhaling the scent of the cigarettes mixed with the amazing perfume Chani always used. It was a perfect mix that somehow took you home. A scent that filled your body and woke up all your senses, sending a cold chill down your spine and making your skin bristle. “He cheated on me with his best friend.” You quietly said. It was the first time you actually said it out loud. You were too scared of saying it because the moment those words escaped your lips, it meant that all of that was real. You heard Chani letting go a sarcastic laugh while taking another cigarette puff. “How ironic. He fucks his best friend but you couldn’t hang out with yours. What an asshole.” Chani said, looking into the horizon, admiring the reflection of the full moon on the small lake in the garden. You decided to mirror his actions and look forward. You actually had nothing to say, you perfectly knew he was right and you had no words to defend Jaeyoon. Not like you would have tried though. “At least now I can hang out with you.” You finally said, taking the cigarette from his lips and placing it in yours, taking a deep breath into it. Suddenly, after taking the deep breath, you started to cough hard, making Chani laugh and take his cigarette back. “You keep being the loser you’ve always been when it comes to smoke.” Chani said laughing at you and turning around so he could face you. “Really funny.” You said, with a hand placed on your chest trying to catch up your breath and with the other hand slightly slapping Chani’s chest playfully.

Hours went by and by the moment you had already finished the small pack of cigarettes he had together and had drunk a total of 5 bottles of soju together. Now, all the tears you have been shedding for the past few days because of that idiot, were replaced by laughs and hiccups you and Chani shared like you used to do before dating Jaeyoon. Now, his eyes gleamed with a more beautiful light, a light you haven’t seen in a long time and that you missed so much. You couldn’t tell if it was because of the alcohol or if it was because of the amount of smoke you had in your lungs but suddenly Chani looked so sexy with his red cheeks due to alcohol and taking deep breaths from the cigarettes. Suddenly, his lips looked so inviting to yours to kiss them. And little by little, without even noticing, your bodies started to get closer and closer.

“You know? I have never noticed how beautiful your eyes were.” Chani suddenly said, looking at your eyes like his life depended on it, admiring them like if he just saw a piece of art in a museum. “And I never knew yours could hold so many stars in them.” You quietly said, admiring his eyes as well in between some more hiccups that made Chani giggle. “I love you (Y/N).” He confessed, placing his right hand on your cheek and before you could say anything, his lips were devouring yours. You tried to break the kiss but it was impossible, his grip was too strong for you to escape. You actually didn’t even know why you wanted to break the kiss but for a slight second everything felt so wrong. “Why don't you want this?” He said, breaking the kiss but still caressing your cheek. “It’s not like I don’t want this, it’s just Jaeyoon-.” You tried to explain. The thought of Jaeyoon cheating on you with his best friend hit you like a rock when you were kissing who used to be your best friend. “Don’t mention that asshole, you’re with me now. If you want this, then just let yourself in.” Chani said, right after placing another desperate kiss on your soft lips. But this time, you totally gave in to the kiss, melting into his lips.

“Chani… Why don’t we go home and continue this there?” You said with a thread of voice, trying to catch up your breath and pressing your legs together to get the slight amount of friction you needed. But Chani was not giving you all you wanted that easily. If he was famous for something, it was for teasing every single girl he took to his apartment and you, the girl he has loved for so many years, were not an exception. “Why are you in such a hurry baby? I thought you wanted to be somewhere where you could forget about everything.” Chani said, leaving a trail of butterfly kisses on your neck with a huge smirk on his face knowing he was getting exactly what he wanted from you. Thankfully, it was late enough for the park to be almost empty and you could play around for a little more before begging him to take you in his motorcycle and drive you home.

Soon, he found the sweet spot on your neck he has been wishing to find ever since he met you and a wider smirk appeared on his lips. “Is my baby getting horny just by a few pecks? I’m sure that asshole could never find your sweet spot on your beautiful neck as fast as I did.” He said, placing numerous pecks on the same spot, making you shiver. A soft moan leaving your lips accidentally finally showed how aroused you were by just the touch of his lips on your skin. “Do you want me that bad?” He said giggling, teasing you a bit more. You just nodded with your eyes shut, denying to look at him and completely losing the small amount of sanity that remained in your body. “I like hearing your voice baby.” He said, almost begging to listen to your voice telling him what you wanted to do as soon as you arrived at your apartment. “I do want you that bad Chani.” You said with a thread of voice, holding the moans that were threatening to escape your lips if he kept kissing your neck the way he has done the last few times.

Fortunately, the ride was short and you didn’t have to wait for much longer to have Chani laying on top of you and pressing his already hard bulge to your core, giving you the friction you have been asking for the last few minutes. “Keep it quiet if you don’t want your neighbors to complain tomorrow baby.” He said, trailing wet kisses down your stomach and grabbing your hand so you couldn’t touch him. You had to admit it was so damn hard to keep it quiet when he was treating you so damn well. “Tell me, do you want my dick in you?” He whispered into your ear, making you blush. “Oh don’t tell me that idiot treated you like a piece of glass? Because I’m not going to do that.” He said with a huge smirk on his lips and with dark eyes. You have never been able to see this side of Chani but you had to admit you loved it. “I like talkative girls and you know that baby. So if you want me to do something, you’ll have to say it.” He said, placing a wet kiss on the same sweet spot on your neck from before, this time leaving a red mark that you’ll have to cover with makeup in the next few days. Jaeyoon always treated you so gently and softly that you never knew how much you would enjoy it when someone actually teased you the way Chani was.

After a few minutes of begging Chani to remove your panties and actually touch you, he finally gave in, touching just the right spots you needed. “For God’s sake Chani!” You said, his name falling from your lips like a mantra, the pleasure he was giving you by just touching you clouding your mind and making you feel dizzy already. “If you don’t keep it quiet, I won’t be that good baby.” He said, increasing the speed of his long fingers. You really tried to hold on your loud moans, you really did, but it was impossible. You couldn’t understand how someone could make you feel so good and undone at the same time by just touching you and you were more than grateful for the amazing world that you have just discovered with him. “Fuck, my name sounds so damn beautiful falling from your lips like that baby.” He groaned, trying his best to hold back his desire of removing his boxers and entering you already. “Fuck me already and you’ll hear even more beautiful sounds.” You begged, moving your hips against his hand, trying to get more friction. Those words were the only thing he needed to get his fingers out of your dripping core and replace them with his hard member that was already aching inside his boxers.

“Are you sure about this?” He asked, a soft gleam appearing on his eyes for a slight second. “You think I would have moaned your name like I have if I wasn’t sure?” You answered slightly laughing and pulling him down by his neck to connect your lips to reassure him. He really tried to find a sign in your eyes that told him to stop but the only thing he could find was lust and desire for him. And that was the only sign he needed to find to slide his member inside of you, taking you to a new paradise.

He slowly entered you after teasing your entrance for a while, a trail of swearings leaving his lips as he entered you. “You feel so fucking good.” He said before pressing his lips back into yours, trying to soothe both of your moans and his groans. Both of you were breathing heavily, chests collapsing into each other as he thrusted into you slowly but deeply, making you feel every single inch of his length. “You like it like this, huh?” He said, with a huge smirk on his face, noticing how you tightened your walls around him every time he thrusted into you.

He maintained the speed for a while but soon, when you were both reaching your limits, his thrusts started to become faster and deeper, reaching places Jaeyoon could have never reached and making you feel like nobody else could ever make you feel. “That’s it baby, call my name. Let that fucking idiot know how good I can make you feel.” Chani said, getting a boost of ego by your loud moans. He didn’t know where to place his hands but he knew for sure one of them had to land around your throat, pressing a little bit and making you feel an undescriptible feeling. His name fell from your lips once again, but this time you cried it out in a loud moan, letting him know you were so close to your high. “Cum for me baby.” He said into your ear, still with his hand wrapped around your neck, leaving soft kisses around your face to land a last kiss on your lips.

After some more thrusts, he finally reached his high and pulled out of you, releasing his loads on your stomach and laying down next to you, trying his best to catch his breath. “That was amazing.” You quietly said, once you were able to recover your breath. “I’m glad you liked it. That Jaeyoon has no idea what he has lost.” Chani said, wrapping his arms around you. You felt so happy suddenly, like if you were floating on a cloud. And you were even more happy to know Chani has been having this kind of feeling for you through all these years. You just hoped you wouldn’t be loved too fast. “We haven’t finished yet, though.” Chani said, knocking you out of your thoughts. You looked at him with a confused and tired gaze, not really knowing what he meant with those words. “Don’t look at me like that, I’m going to fuck you until you forget that asshole’s name.” He said laughing and making you laugh as well. You wouldn’t have minded as long as it was him the one doing that though. After all, he really was a ‘bad influence’ but well, you didn’t really care about being bad influenced.

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funkymbtifiction · 2 years

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Do you have advice for a 6 who has been disintegrating for YEARS? I used to be so humble, so anti-arrogance, so focused on team work and wanted other people to succeed as much as me. But for the last four years i have become obsessed with success and i feel worthless if i'm not the best. I beat myself up every time i fail [...] I don't know what to do, i want my humility back, and this has been going on for way too many years already :(

Are you sure this is disintegration, or are you a 631 who, because of reaching a higher and far more difficult level of academia, is over-using your 3 fix and working yourself into emotional exhaustion? Feeling like you 'should' be getting top marks all the time, and not getting them is a reflection on your competency and self-worth?

If this is the case, being a 6-3 can be hell, especially with a 1 fix that brings in a determination to work hard and succeed, because there is so much friction between the desire to be relatable from the 6, but the fierce ambition of a 3 fix who wants to beat everyone else, as a way to prove to the 6 that "we can do this after all" and squelch out any self-doubts. Meanwhile, the 1 would be self-judging hard for not being a better person while doing it.

The solution is to bring your fixes into balance. You need to do a certain amount of introspection and ask yourself a lot of questions about why school is such an insanely stressful experience, that you have become so aggressive in needing to win. Are you over-compensating to get away from your fear of not being good enough, feeling the pressures of high academia like never before (this is so much harder than high school!), or believing (untruthfully) that if you do not win or succeed or get 100% on a test that you have failed? Are you creating more stress for yourself by setting unreasonably high standards? Are you remaining connected emotionally to other people so that you can feel happy for them when they succeed?

I feel like there's some lower functions happening here as well, in your MBTI type -- stress is driving you into them and making you extra hard on yourself, rather than you setting normal expectations and allowing yourself to make mistakes. One loss doesn't make you a failure; not acing one class won't matter in the grand scheme of things. One day, you won't be in college anymore, you will be out in the real world where how well you did on this test won't matter. You will forget many of the things that once seemed so vital. A little perspective is a great thing sometimes.

Something I learned from a 9 is to ask myself -- will this matter a year from now? Maybe you could start asking yourself that. Learning to prioritize what matters can be freeing in a variety of ways. If doing well on this test matters, because it affects your overall scores and influences how soon you graduate, then focus on doing well on that test. It's about doing your best, not getting attention for it, or beating the other person -- but doing YOUR best. If who wins this debate won't matter a year from now, learn to de-escalate your response.

I would also think about the person you want to be, and work toward that. If you hate being competitive, don't compete. If you hate being envious of others' successes, because you are jealous of them, ask yourself where this jealousy is coming from. Spend time with yourself, to recenter yourself. Draw away, and talk to yourself. Dig into what is behind your response. Fear of not being good enough? Catch yourself when you don't like yourself, and... choose to act differently. I will tell myself to STOP, and then be the opposite. You are not powerless. You can take control of your feelings. You can take control over how you respond. Find something that helps you. If you believe in prayer, pray about it. If you believe in meditation, start doing that in the morning before you start your day. If you need time away from people, take it. If the environment is triggering this, what can you do to change it? Think productively about what you want to be, and how you want to be, and make a plan of what to do, while you are calm and in your right mind. "If X happens, I am going to do Y."

I'm sorry you feel so stressed and do not like the person you have become. I hope things ease up for you and you can find your way back to yourself.

#question #enneagram #enneagram 6 #enneagram 3

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caffernnn · 3 years

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Haru’s hopelessness - an extensive rambling.

Watchers of Free! Eternal Summer - y’all remember this moment, right?

Throughout S2, as some of the boys now have to seriously think about their lives and paths after high school, Haru struggles to think past what he’s always known: swimming for his friends/himself, eating mackerel, and being free. Things arguably take a darker turn once Haru cannot run from the question anymore and breaks, lashing out at Rin and saying he doesn’t have a dream or a future.

There are so many things that can be unpacked from this quote alone, and my thoughts on the matter will probably be sporadic, but here are a few key things I’d like to try diving into in this post:

My interpretation of Haru’s, Makoto’s, and Rin’s characters’ mindsets

What Haru is likely trying to say

How Makoto and Rin interpret his words (based on their mindsets and experiences)

I’d love to hear other people’s thoughts on it all as well, so please feel free to add on :)

DISCLAIMER: This post will reference material outside of S2 itself to explain my insight/interpretation of the characters (S1 episodes, High Speed novel), but I won’t be putting full links to all of those materials in this post. If you’d like a specific link to anything I’m referencing, let me know and I can try to dig one up.

When first hearing Haru say that he doesn’t have a dream or a future, it is shocking and concerning, especially to his friends. However, as broken as lost as Haru is in this moment, the weight of his words and what he’s verbally trying to convey is most likely different than what his friends hear. I feel as if a big reason for this comes down to the different ways the characters perceive time and approach general goal-setting.

Here is a video that can give a frame of reference for what I mean by “time perception,” but I’ll still try to explain my thinking ---> https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJsdVUhu/

Rin and Haru butt heads on many occasions throughout the series due to having opposing characteristics and approaches to life. The big difference that comes into play during S2 is how they both approach goal-setting and time. As soon as we’re introduced to Rin, it becomes apparent that he is someone who is a visionary that has always set his sights on the future. From boldly proclaiming his Olympic goals in elementary school to encouraging their team to put their relay trophy into a time capsule, Rin establishes himself early on as a dreamer that puts his all into his long-term goals. Being someone who thinks about things in this manner isn’t inherently good or bad, but it does lend a hand to many of the issues we see Rin go through in S1 (having tunnel vision on his goal that isolates him from his friends, being prone to catastrophize when confronted with road blocks along the way [like when he breaks down after losing to Haru in middle school], etc.). However, all of that dreaming puts him at an advantage now when preparing to move forward into post-high-school life. He has a frame of reference for most of his next steps (winning races, talking to scouts), and now he just has to make it a reality.

Haru, in essence, lives his life in the moment. If he wants to swim, he’ll try to swim; if he wants mackerel, he’ll try to make mackerel. He lets the people around him (usually Makoto) worry about the possible consequences for his actions (swimming too early in spring might get him sick, swimming in a fish tank might get him kicked out of XYZ place, cooking mackerel after a long bath might make him late for school, etc.). The way he thinks about all of his “tomorrows” beyond acting freely on impulse is through having a consistent routine or norm to cling onto. When swimming, he’ll swim freestyle. When given a choice, he’ll default to eating mackerel. He’ll find a way to get in a swim or a bath most days because water is safe. He’ll walk with Makoto to and from school, sticking to the side of the path closest to the ocean and anticipating sharing the same split popsicle. This is about as much thought as he lends to the future, usually: he’ll keep doing the things that make him happy and comfortable, whatever that’ll mean to him in the moment. In opposition of Rin, this frame of mind based in immediacy and short-term goals helps him in S1 (teaching Rin to appreciate the moment, connecting with his friends, not getting lost in the overly analytical or competitive side of swimming), but it makes the challenges that come with his looming graduation in S2 much harder to cope with.

The reason that it’s important to understand how both Haru and Rin frame their perceptions of time is because it plays right into what Haru is saying during their argument. He is frustrated with Rin because Rin doesn’t understand the way Haru thinks/lives moment-to-moment (he yells as much in this fight) and he is tired of hearing people for years try and push him into long-term thinking about his future when he doesn’t naturally approach life that way. Think back to one of the first things Haru said in S1:

“When you're ten, they call you a prodigy. When you're fifteen, they call you a genius. Once you hit twenty, you're just an ordinary person. About three years until I'm ordinary. Man... I can't wait to be ordinary.”

Because of Haru’s swimming abilities, people have looked at him as a prodigy and have had their own visions about his potential or his future ever since he was young. Even if it seems like flattery, Haru feels boxed in by all of this. Being considered a prodigy comes with expectations that put him on a pedestal he never asked to be placed on -- if he’s going to swim, he’s expected to swim well; if he swims well, he’s expected to capitalize on his abilities in a competitive manner or expand his horizons to other forms of swimming; if he’s going to live his life tied to the water, people view him as a swimmer before they view him as anything/anyone else. Haru has been frustrated with all of this since he was younger (as expressed in S1), but it gets even worse as people close in on Haru from all sides with advice and sentiments that compound in Haru’s head as belonging to the echo chamber he hates so much.

So... what does this all mean in relevance to Haru saying he doesn’t have a dream or a future? Here’s my line of thinking: all of the internalized frustration Haru has with long-term thinkers (from his perspective) speaking over him and not taking time to understand his in-the-moment intuition-led mindset comes out in this line. What Haru is trying to say is that he doesn’t have a detailed long-term plan because he isn’t a romantic visionary like Rin. He wants to stick with his relatively free lifestyle (y’know, the one where he can do what he wants, but still ultimately sticks to a routine) because he sees no point in forcing himself to put effort into big changes if 1) he’s satisfied and 2) the system isn’t broken.*

*we learn later, especially through Haru and Makoto’s later fight, that these two points are up for debate, but this is what Haru has convinced himself to believe at the time of this specific confrontation.

However, with the way Haru vocalizes this frustration, it is vague enough that Rin and the others hear something much different. It’s written right on their faces. Like I mentioned earlier, being a long-term thinker prone to catastrophizing, Rin interprets (and possibly misconstrues) Haru’s words to mean that he doesn’t think he has the potential or abilities to strive for something. Rin feels Haru’s words like a punch to the gut because he relates Haru’s hopelessness to the times he has felt lost and hopeless, like when defeat after defeat led to him breaking down after his middle school race with Haru. It’s shocking and it stings for Rin to hear, because as much as he’s learned to believe in himself and his own future, he’s also held onto those dreams and hope for his friends. I’ll admit, his dedication and borderline obsession with swimming lends to him mostly vocalizing the dreams he has for his friends that are related to swimming (Makoto and Haru getting scouted, Sousuke returning to swimming), but the love is still there.

The idea of long-term vs short-term thinkers I’ve presented isn’t completely dichotomous or black-and-white, even though Haru and Rin tend to fall on the far opposite sides of the proposed spectrum. So, where does someone like Makoto fall?

Makoto is an interesting case. From how I’ve come to understand his character, I would say he also looks to the future, albeit in less idealistic or extreme ways than Rin. Makoto’s forward line of thinking presents itself through both his people-pleasing tendencies and his caring disposition. When Makoto interacts with people, he is often observant and calculating, trying to figure out how he can navigate a conversation in the most complimentary or polite manner. This ability and tendency to understand/empathize with others ties into a lot of the roles he takes on: team captain, big brother, part-time position as a swim coach, full-time position as Haru’s impulse control... he is inclined to think about the future and all of the possible consequences for his actions. This also ties into some of the other things we know Makoto’s character for, such as being a scaredy-cat (aka, someone who overthinks consequences in fear of the unknown) and a ray of sunshine (aka, someone who wants to see the best in people and holds onto optimism/hope for the people he loves, even if it sometimes means not saving enough for himself and his own abilities).

Despite being more of a forward-thinker, Makoto has definitely been influenced by his close relationship with Haru. Makoto has spent most of his life observing and learning how to read Haru, and it has been shown time and time again that Makoto is one of the people (if not, the person) that understands Haru best. He understands that Haru values the freedom of choice and harbors a desire for unconditional appreciation. He understands that Haru puts stock in consistency/reliability and needs time and space to process or reflect when life deviates from that carefully-crafted norm. Makoto’s actions towards Haru over the years all reflect him trying to be respectful of these observations. Even when he can tell something is bothering Haru, Makoto tries to let Haru work it out on his own first, not prodding him for information but letting his presence/support be known all the same. I digress, being best friends, their lives and routines are tightly woven together. Because of this, Makoto spends a lot of time also living in-the-moment with Haru -- he is a large proponent in Haru’s “free” lifestyle.

Since Makoto has a foot in both Haru and Rin’s respective worlds, how does he interpret Haru’s declaration that he doesn’t have a dream or a future? Surely, since he understands Haru and his position so well and has always been respectful of his mindset/wishes, he gets what Haru is trying to say... right?

Unfortunately for Haru (or fortunately, depending on who you ask), Makoto is immediately concerned by those words in a way similar to Rin. Like I mentioned earlier, Makoto holds deep optimism and hope in his chest for all of the people he cares about. Even though he never forced lofty expectations onto Haru to swim or be anything other than himself, he still holds so much care and hope for his best friend. For Makoto to hear that Haru might not have that faith in himself or the belief that he is worth a bright future, it breaks his heart. Similar to Rin, he is probably thinking back to his own moments of hopelessness, and I can’t help but think back to the lost and scared Makoto fighting with himself during the middle school days. When entering middle school, Makoto struggles with his identity, trying to figure out just how dependent he is on Haru’s friendship. One of his darkest moments in my mind comes from Chapter 8 of the High Speed! 2 novel, when Makoto is beating himself up especially hard after being frozen by his fear of the ocean yet again. Haru finds Makoto alone on a secluded part of the shore, where he says this:

“Will I be alright even if Haru isn’t here? …..I wanted to make sure of that.”

Raising his eyebrows, he shows a lonely smile. Makoto was fighting all along. He was suffering, all along. In a place where Haruka’s thoughts couldn’t possibly reach...

“Would Haru be alright even if I weren’t here?”

If Makoto’s internal struggles throughout their middle school days reveal anything, it is that Makoto has experienced a hopelessness that he wouldn’t ever wish on his friends. To think that Haru might now be at war with himself in a way that makes him question his own place in the world, his future... it is the ultimate catalyst for Makoto to step in and try to talk to Haru. Sadly, we all remember how that confrontation went...

ENTER: THE FIREWORKS FIGHT (S2E11)

(Since this post is already super long, I might go more into my thoughts on how this all plays into the misunderstandings about the fireworks fight in a separate post. We’ve talked about the fight at length on multiple occasions and you can definitely find my thoughts on the matter if you look under the “#fireworks angst night” or “#meta” tags on my profile.)

If you’ve made it this far into the post, thanks for sticking with me. I’d love to hear about how you interpreted Haru’s words or how you think the others took in his breakdown.

#long post #long long post #these poor complex boys with complex emotions #i just... care about them a whole bunch #meta #free! eternal summer #free! anime #ship neutral I think??#makoto tachibana #haruka nanase #rin matsuoka #fireworks angst night #(kinda but not really)#catherine wrote a thing!

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seyaryminamoto · 3 years

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my school works are piled up this past few weeks (graduating tingz) and i just started reading the deadlock novel it feels like i'm reading a sokkla fic every time Mcashe has a scene because they just give off the vibes skskskskksksks. BTW, what's your top5 fav scenes from the novel? PS: I'm smiling like an idiot while reading the novel ughh i hate myself

I KNOW, RIIIIIGHT?! *-* and don't hate yourself, my anon friend, I spent the whole novel smiling and laughing and losing my goddamn mind because I was having the time of my life xD enjoy this beautiful content as best you can!

I mean, frankly, Reunion already had all the Sokkla vibes I could've wanted/needed to ship these two like FedEx and I always knew I wasn't getting off this ride anytime soon. But gosh, this book... it gave me everything I wanted and MORE! Their dynamics are soooo similar to Sokkla team-up dynamics, two power couples kicking ass and taking names... oh, I just love it so much. I probably will end up reading the book a third time soon x'D

As for my favorite scenes, damn, this is tricky xD

KEYCHAIN! HE MADE HER KEYCHAIN!! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!! God, it's just amazing how the book explains the "vintage" look for Ashe's hoverbike the way it does, and that they literally built it together *screams!!!*, but then he gives her that keychain for her birthday present, and the implications!! THE IMPLICATIONS!!! He gave her a keychain she's held onto for TWENTY YEARS?!?!?! Ships in the OW fandom have sailed far and wide with less than breadcrumbs: we literally have been granted a boon from the GODS with all this extra context for the little things in Reunion xD

Ashe going to hell and back to save her kidnapped BFF-for-whom-she-totally-doesn't-have-feelings-yeah-yeah-sure-Jan. I love the fact that McCree is, in a way, Ashe's damsel in distress and not the other way around xD Of course, it's what you'd expect from an Ashe-centric story, but it's still an amazing sequence, all around. Gotta highlight how she loves the way he smiles like a madman when they have that shootout at the end, and how he worries so much over Ashe's injury when he took an even worse one than she did (the Sokkla vibes in that particular situation were SO STRONG! I SWEAR!).

"Jesse McCree, are you trying to make me say you're handsome?" "Am I?" ... do I need to say more. That FLIRTING. These two were on fire already and they'd only known each other for like... weeks, at this point? x'D He has no sense of moderation, he's soooo into her and doesn't hide it at all. Ashe is so busy trying to plot all the crime and Jesse's practically like a shojo heroine, "oh I can feel it, this is how my love story begins!", basically xD

Finally I pick a not-McAshe scene... to bring up the one where Ashe picks up the Viper on her last moment in Lead Rose Manor. That moment was just... POWERFUL. The feeling of epicness in that scene just overwhelmed me when I was reading it xD

The ending of the book :'D the fully formed Deadlock Gang ready for business, down to the explanation for the Est. 1976 in the logo... *sobs* the fact that so much about the character design choices in these two characters is a shoutout to the past they share is just... *gross sobbing* oh, I just love it to pieces, I'm not even sorry.

Ashe's bike race to save B.O.B. x'D that whole situation was bonkers but I looooved how fierce she was about protecting her one and only buddy while growing up (AND THAT JESSE BLUSHED WHEN SHE TAUNTED HIM WAS JUST THE CHERRY ON TOP!). I appreciated learning more about the Omnic War and its consequences, how Ashe reflects on having escaped it practically untouched in virtue of her money and societal privilege while her new friends all faced many hardships to survive. But I can't help but also love that, however uneasy others could have been about the Best Omnic Butler, Ashe was so fiercely loyal to B.O.B. that she nearly broke Julian's nose herself over his ridiculousness x'D That's HER big omnic buddy and she's not about to lose him to anyone, not her shitty parents, not a bet in a race, NOTHING! (and it's so cute that B.O.B. is just as loyal to her, too *sobs*)

Ashe grabbing McCree's arm to explain things to him on their first heist and him being all "you gonna leave that there?" and only then does she realize her hand's still on him x'D what a McCree line, and he was absolutely enjoying the attention, he doesn't even pretend otherwise.

Everything poetic McCree says or does... meanwhile Ashe's like "um yeah I don't care about poetry I want money", right until his poet soul totally smashes her square in the heart with the KEYCHAIN!!! But damn, I swear I thought McCree would hold back a lot more, and yet there he was, saying things like Calamity was brilliant and mysterious... you could practically hear B.O.B., Julian and Frankie going "I can see what's happening..." in the background xD

The conversation about what they wanted to do once they were loaded with all the cash they could possibly want. That one was a real number on my heartstrings. It ties up to what I said earlier with Ashe finally being in touch with people who are completely removed from the ridiculous social circles of her parents and her school, people who really lost a lot in the war. But where Julian and Frankie seem to look at the past a lot, I loved that Jesse is basically just thinking about the future. The fact that he says he wants to chill out in a farm and that this is what he wants in life... many, MANY, shippy wheels have turned in my head since I read that <.< maaaany...

WHEN JESSE NEARLY FALLS AND ASHE CATCHES HIM!!! UNDERRRATED AS HECK!!! The fact that he's taunting her about fear of heights, then he nearly plummets to his death because ironies are beautiful xD and Ashe pulls him back to safety only to say that she's not afraid of heights but afraid of ~FALLING~??? I mean, okay, sure, maybe I'm reading too much into that line... or maybe I'm not <.< either way, the truth is I just love how absolutely broad of interpretation that scene and that DIALOGUE are :> ehehehe.

Oh, their first encounter. The fact that it's so cute and fun, and that it's this low in the list tells you how GOOD this book was x'D "You've got an awful lot of grit for a rich girl," first words he spoke to the love of his life xD then how they talked and laughed together about the crazy stories he shared (she was crying of laughter for the first time in her life! precious girl!), and then how she sat in the car thinking about the strange feeling she was left with after meeting him... they seriously had a meetcute in prison, how can a ship get any better? xD

WHEN HE COMES BACK TO HER WHEN THEIR FIRST HEIST GOES WRONG!!! That Ashe expects him to just leave after she falls off their getaway vehicle, but Jesse saves her and goes "pfft that's just not my style", basically... *sobs* without realizing it she ends up picking up that particular philosophy of his, saving her friends no matter the cost...! Honestly, though, the fact that every time something like this happens it hits Ashe like a truck racing downhill with no brakes because she's NEVER been cared about by anyone but B.O.B. and she's completely new to friendships and bonding with people... and in the mean time, Jesse immediately is "ride or die" with her because that's how he rolls... beautiful relationship dynamics between characters who influence each other for the better are just beautiful :')

A silly one here: Jesse enjoying the good life in Lead Rose. That description of him looking like a marshmallow in the CHAISE LOUNGEEEEE!!! (the one he references in their in-game interactions *CRYING SO MANY TEARS*), was just too cute to bear x'D Ashe just jumping back into work mode... while he was just thrilled to be a marshmallow in a towel xD

... So, um, I went overboard because I love this book a little too much for my own good :> what can I say? When things I love are good, I go wild xD There's probably more scenes I loved, but these... thirteen? XD are the ones that came to mind.

I think one of my favorite things now is reexamining Reunion with all this extra context in mind. The first time I watched that cinematic I, of course, fell in love with these two outlaws because how could I not? But while subsequent rewatches revealed a lot of things I didn't pay enough attention to the first time around, the book has done even more than I could imagine possible for a short that was already as shippy as could be xD

Ooookay so, shippy ramblings about Reunion, coming up! (simply because I have to put these down SOMEWHERE XD and your ask was a good idea for that, anon!)

First off, Jesse very much staged the whole rodeo in Reunion. He sent the tip to Ashe, he wanted Echo's crate specifically. He thought they could work together, basically, despite knowing it was entirely possible that those hopes wouldn't pay off. This train, according to the wikia, was a government train, so Jesse is very much telling Ashe to give a finger to the government for all he cares, all he wants is one (1) crate.

Ergo, Jesse, for all his "nice guy bountyhunter" deal, doesn't disapprove of Deadlock's actions. If anything, he counts on them to be exactly what he needs in order to get what he wants. He practically trusts Ashe to pull off the train heist disaster perfectly and only steps up when it's time to collect Echo.

Then the wacky shoot-out happens, it's veeeery charged (the UST is so thick, I swear...), and Jesse wins. He ties up Ashe, floats her off on the payload with the rest of the gang, and he sets Echo free. He's helping her out very nicely and everything, but the context in question is... he received the recall notification thingy XD Winston called him back to Overwatch, and Jesse...

... Jesse doesn't want to go back.

Jesse says "they want me", and the displeased tone of his voice, paired with the look on his face when he says that line, speak for themselves.

That, in my humble opinion, isn't the sequence of expressions you'd expect from someone who intends to return to the group where he thrived, had the time of his life and found his true calling. To me, he actually looks irritated about the recall (the sequence of expressions during that line is much better when you watch the full thing x'D), as though he REALLY doesn't want to return. He's not against Overwatch, I'm not quite saying that, otherwise he wouldn't have set Echo free and told her to go back at all... but this isn't remorse. It's not "Oh, I'm not good enough for Overwatch anymore". Nope... this is "My time with them is over and I don't plan on going back unless I have no choice", as far as I can tell.

If OW2 does bring him back into the fold and he's a perfectly chill and happy guy about it, I'll seriously be surprised. I mean, he could have set Echo free and, once his business is over, returned to Overwatch with her, he could have been in the Paris cinematic if he'd done that...

But he's not there.

Which outright says he didn't do that :> oops.

Basically, I think Jesse's reaction in Retribution (where he's markedly the most morally correct one of the bunch, and he's the former outlaw :'D) tells you his displeasure with Overwatch ran very, very deep. And someone can very easily say he felt the same way about Deadlock and that's why he left them for Overwatch... but that's conjecture. His displeasure with Blackwatch (and, in consequence, Overwatch), however, is FACT. And the previous conjecture falls flat pretty quickly considering he's perfectly fine with Ashe's train heist, even sets it up himself, from what the story suggests, so... how ~appalled~ was he over her choices and actions? Not appalled at all, if you ask me, and after you read Deadlock Rebels, you actually understand why: Jesse trusts Ashe.

From the first moment she enters the same prison block he's in, he's drawn to her. He wants to impress her, he absolutely enjoys her company and making her laugh (just as much as she enjoyed laughing at his wacky stories), and he's plain thrilled that she comes back for him when she does. Ashe manages the gang with inexperience but she's always willing to improve, and you see Jesse sticking with her through thick and thin, supporting her at the best and worst times alike, always putting his faith on her and constantly watching out for her (he protected and shielded her from attacks with his own body sooooo many times *sobs*). Ashe starts out intending to keep most profits for herself, and Jesse doesn't care much at first... but then she starts to share profit equally between their team. She works on her own bike herself, her own ride, and she plans and solves problems as best she can, to a point of even going overboard with planning too much. She's wild, reckless and takes insane risks... and this guy loves every second of it. The matter of morality regarding the actions of a criminal gang is, of course, something to think about... but as far as the book goes, Ashe mainly targets her own family, their specific brand of bullshit, and in the process she ends up helping lots of people and even saving lives that might not have been saved otherwise. I'm not going to put my hand on the fire here and say Deadlock never ever did anything absolutely wrong to people who didn't deserve it... but for a criminal gang? They're honestly the most wholesome one the OW team could have come up with, if you ask me.

So where you see Jesse is very much antagonistic with Reaper/Reyes, where he loses his temper with the guy's choices, he doesn't ever do that with Ashe. Overwatch ARE supposed to be the good guys... so how weird that Jesse McCree, reformed outlaw, ends up so disappointed with these guys when he was actually thrilled with Ashe's managing of their gang, as far as we saw. So much so that, when it came down to it, Jesse McCree, 20 years later, still counts on Ashe to give him a hand (without her full awareness) with a little operation to help out an old friend of his. Also worth pointing out: he doesn't want to fight at all, while Ashe, of course, does. Deadlock for life, is what Jesse said... and he's not Deadlock anymore, hasn't been for who knows how long. Worse yet... his tattooed arm is gone. It's like all his ties to Deadlock have been severed.

And even so, he came to Ashe and hoped she wouldn't want a shootout with him. Even when he knows she might be beyond unforgiving because of the betrayal (he has seen directly how outraged she was about a certain someone betraying her in the book...), Jesse goes back anyway and hopes it won't come to this.

THE IMPLICATIONS, MAN!!!

Carrying on: Echo is surprised that Jesse shows no intentions of going back to Overwatch. She asks him what he's going to do... and what does Jesse say?

He puts his cowboy hat back on (the symbolism in this short, I swear...), and when she asks him what he's going to do, he tells her "I've got some business to attend to."

THE MUSIC PICKS UP.

AND THEN HE CLIMBS ON THE BIKE HE BUILT WITH ASHE.

YOU GET A DELIBERATE CLOSE-UP TO THE KEYCHAIN.

THEN THE CAMERA PANS UP TO FOCUS ON THE PICTURE, TORN AND TAPED BACK TOGETHER, THAT ASHE CARRIES ON THIS BIKE, A BIKE WHICH, LET'S BE REAL, IS BASICALLY A MCASHE BABY CHOPPER/HOVERBIKE HYBRID, AND AS SHE PUTS IT LATER, IS...

HER

BIKE!!!

When Jesse says he has business to attend to, he could pick up any bike he wants (since it'd stand to reason that the other guys Ashe came in with would have bikes of their own). He could escape on horseback for all we know xD so there are lots of options... but no. He takes HERS. Right after saying he has "business to attend to".

Look, I could be wrong. I could be dead wrong. I can absolutely be digging around and going INSANE because nothing I ship EVER gets this much content.

But we literally get a guy saying he has "business" to take care of, and the cinematic focuses exclusively on elements that, even BEFORE Deadlock Rebels, all point towards Ashe?! You could easily say that taking her bike is just the final nail on the coffin, his last trolling idea to mess with his one true love... but that picture is right there. That picture, with them in their youth. The picture, btw, was bigger than just them: B.O.B.'s hand is there. The top of the picture is uneven, suggesting Ashe probably tore it to shreds in a fit of rage... and then specifically put together THEIR PART. And then she taped that to her bike's dashboard. Meaning, she carries the goddamn memory of Jesse with her EVERYWHERE SHE GOES. And she does it WILLINGLY.

Which, in turn, answers why Jesse expects MAYBE Ashe wouldn't go full-on hostile when they meet: this trolling cowboy knows exactly what he means to Ashe. He's not surprised when he sees that picture on the bike. He doesn't toss it away, which he could have, if he were saying "we are history now, forget it gurl" (and let's be honest, what a dick move that would have been @_@), he doesn't flinch after noticing and then goes "yeah, no, I'm picking another bike".

NOPE. The familiarity with which they talk, the way he hopes she'll just let him walk away, the fact that she DIDN'T change the keychain and bike in all those years and he's not even SURPRISED...

Jesse knows how much she loves him, point-blank. He's completely aware of it... and he's very much okay with it.

So much so... that I'm something of a 90% sure that the business he intends to deal with is ASHE HERSELF.

And no, I don't mean he's going to go on another shootout with her... I mean, evidently, that Jesse wants to come home. That he's tried the life of Overwatch, and he's decided to leave it behind. He's turned bountyhunter now, vigilante, pretty much... but he comes back to Ashe all the same. He's come back for the first time in who knows how long (going by Ashe's expressions and sarcasm with the "you promised you'd write" line, it miiiiiiight be they haven't seen each other since he got recruited into Blackwatch), and he expected a peaceful encounter, no less.

A good question to ask here is... what did Jesse hope would happen, if the encounter HAD been peaceful? He would've released Echo, sent her away to her business, and stayed behind anyway because he had business to deal with. Which business? :'D why... the business that would've been standing right in front of him.

There's no other, logical reason why this cinematic would put Ashe and McCree's picture into focus right when McCree says what he does to Echo. There's no other reasonable choice why McCree would turn his back on Overwatch quite so firmly. We know he had two important ties in his life: Overwatch and Deadlock. And Overwatch stole him away from Deadlock for a VERY long time. Well over half the time Deadlock has been in operations, as far as I can tell. He picked Overwatch over Deadlock once before... and now, it seems he's picking Deadlock over Overwatch instead :')

The follow-up short, Roadtrip, doesn't do anything to change my mind. The trolling jerk, Jesse McCree, hovers past Ashe's payload, where she's just... complaining, as she hovers xD going by what I know of the game and that map, the payload may just be en route to the gang's hideout, so that, I'd say, could explain why she hasn't climbed off it or escaped in any way (which she reasonably would have, if Jesse was trying to, I don't know, send her and her people to the authorities).

My point here is, however, that Jesse is headed the same way the payload is. If his destination is the same one, he'll beat it there for sure. Maybe, yes, he'll go away and drive well past the hideout... but maybe that's exactly where he intended to go.

Maybe, in the end, Reunion is about a man who's finally coming home :D

In addition, goes without saying, Ashe's rant about how everyone falls to pieces over Jesse showing his "stupid mug" (uh-huh, stupid, ANGELIC mug, we know what you really think, girl xD) ends with her saying she should have "put a bullet in him the minute he showed up".

Which begs the question of why didn't she.

Then, of course, she says she hates McCree when he drives past her while listening to some really ridiculous honky-tonky-sounding music x'D I cannot even help but imagine him deliberately picking that radio station or whatever it was just to annoy Ashe when he drove beside her, and so that she can get extra pissed when she retrieves her beloved bike, turns on the music and it's just more honky-tonky stuff x'D but anyway, the thing is she shouts after him, tells him that's her bike and says she hates him. B.O.B. wordlessly speaks for us McAshe shippers by giving Ashe the most "sure, Jan" side-eye in the history of side-eyes, and Ashe notices and is outraged enough to knock B.O.B.'s little hat right off his head again.

Again... this is renowned outlaw Elizabeth Caledonia "Calamity" Ashe, sitting on a payload, groaning about the guy she once very much had feelings for (and that doesn't even begin to cut it, if you ask me x'D) and for whom she tooooootally doesn't anymore, that picture on her bike doesn't MEAN that, OBVIOUSLYYYY!!, and so, she sits up, complains and doesn't do much of anything to get out of her current situation, right? :>

So, summing up my current understanding of EVERYTHING, thanks to Deadlock Rebels and my obsessive rewatches of Reunion + Roadtrip:

Jesse deliberately sought out Ashe so she would indirectly, unknowingly, help him set Echo free from the government's clutches.

Jesse hoped for a peaceful encounter despite knowing he might not get one.

Jesse has no intentions of returning to Overwatch but was willing to perform one final act of service for them by releasing Echo so she'd go give Winston and co. a hand.

Jesse is NOT surprised to see that Ashe: 1. Didn't change bikes at some point in the twenty years since they built it. 2. Didn't swap the ignition key for a button, the way she says she thought to do it in the novel until he gives her the keychain. 3. KEPT THE POETIC AF KEYCHAIN, despite resenting Jesse for his betrayal. 4. KEEPS A PICTURE OF THEM IN THEIR YOUNGER YEARS PASTED ON HER BIKE'S DASHBOARD.

Jesse claims he has business to deal with: he doesn't clarify said business verbally, but every shot after he says those words focuses on elements related to Ashe... and then, along with the novel's context, it's elements related to their BOND. Everything in that shot, EVERYTHING, is connected to the two of them. Elements that weren't shown before or during their shootout, and that are only introduced in that final moment when McCree is off to deal with his "business".

Ashe doesn't climb off the payload or stops it (which, going by how McCree simply pressed a button, and Ashe isn't immobilized in the least, she easily could have done it too if she had wanted to). Suggesting that, wherever the payload is heading, it isn't anywhere dangerous for Ashe and her crew, ergo, she is 100% sure McCree isn't trying to screw her over by turning her in to the authorities or so (or, at worst, she's completely confident that, even if he is going to do this, she'll be able to get out of it easily).

Jesse drives in the same direction the payload is headed. Another hint that suggests he might intend to head to the Deadlock hideout and that, whatever business he has left to deal with, it involves them.

If his intent ISN'T to go to the hideout... Jesse is still guaranteeing that Ashe will come after him by stealing her bike, the 18th birthday gift he gave her, and the picture she keeps of them. That he takes that very bike practically serves as painting a target on his back for her to hunt down, and he KNOWS IT.

In short: Jesse will have plenty of business with the Deadlock Gang in his future, and going by how pleased he seems to be when riding the bike, he's perfectly happy to handle that business on his terms, whenever he wants to handle it.

Extra tidbit: there's nothing in Deadlock Rebels about Jesse's smoking habit, something he definitely did pick up at some point while in the gang because, hahaha, he IS smoking in the picture Ashe keeps of him :> Which makes me wonder why, of all pictures Ashe chooses to keep on her bike's dashboard, she picks one where he's smoking.

Then, it makes me wonder about the fact that Jesse deliberately starts smoking when he's standing right in front of her (and then he winks at her!). He tosses that cigar after things get kind of dangerous for him because B.O.B. does something, and then... then he goes back to smoking.

RIGHT WHEN HE'S CLIMBING ON THE BIKE.

Like... seriously...

*unintelligible fangirl screaming*

I could be looking too deeply into this. I know I could be. Maybe Blizzard just wants me to go CRAZY with little symbolism and hints charged with SO MUCH MEANING that maybe don't have as much meaning as I thought it did...

... But man, I've sailed into the depths of the shippiest oceans for many ships that have gotten actual breadcrumbs from canon. I've gone wild over ships that have zero opportunity to become a thing in canon continuity. I've written a nearly 3M words story based on a ship that is just UNEXPLORED AMAZING POTENTIAL and ngl, I love exploring it myself, so I don't even begrudge canon that much for not giving it to me anymore.

But the fact is, no ship in OW, as far as I've seen, has remotely as much content, hints and strong ties as McAshe does -- at least, no ships between heroes. We had a cinematic that was CHARGED with significance, with little gestures, with even the smallest facial expressions that carried soooo much more meaning than whole episodes or even seasons in TV shows. And then? We got a novel. A full novel depicting their origins and exploring their dynamics, how tight their friendship was, and how some strong feelings were certainly brewing there, even if neither one was ready to act on them yet (as far as we saw...).

Finally... I'll say I did start working on a Sokkla Western AU ages ago because the idea I had for one was pretty amusing. Then Reunion dropped, and I said "Why would I need to finish that story anymore when the Sokkla Western AU is RIGHT HERE?!"

And that's it, I will stop rambling now because this got insanely long x'D but thank you very very much for giving me this chance to go WILD on everything I can see, within all those canon hints, with these two *-*

#anon #mcashe #the fact that canon is treating me right for once #is blowing my mind and always will #look I can end up crying in a heap when OW2 drops and we find out that nothing I thought of was real #it's entirely possible #... but we already got so much #SOOOOO MUCH #that I can't even say I'd be mad x'D #I am one happy camper on this ship #and I love them to pieces #I wish I had the time/chance to make all the art I've been inspired to about them *cries ten rivers*#one day... one day

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bansheeoftheforest · 3 years

Note

Uh, is there still an angst break? Ignore this ask until your ready if so 👉😎👉

What was the au where Jekylls pushed down the stairs and experiences a skull crackening again? Oh well but I've been thinking of a branch of that where Jekyll doesn't know hes dead like all day. I also cant remember if that was already discussed or not

The lodgers patch him up, he complains of a headache, and goes on his merry way! He's confused why all the lodgers are so nervous and being nice to him all of the sudden, why creature is looking at him with a stange mix of empathy and pity. He was told he fell down the stairs, fell unconscious, and obtained a bit of an injury. He cant fathom why Frankenstein is "The only doctor who can treat him" why he has to constantly go to her for checkups. Why Maijabi is suddenly following him practically everywhere.

Hyde squeezes back control for a moment and tries the potion but it doesn't work. Maybe a bit of pain but certainly no transformation. Jekyll assumes his injury or whatever medication they're giving him to treat it somehow negated the effects

Jekyll complains about "suddenly blacking out" the lodgers know its because his soul is slippery. They tell him it must just be a side effect of the injury and not to worry

How long can they keep it secret from him? When does he find out? Does he? Does it get to be years only for him to realize that he hasn't aged? That he still needs checkups from Frankenstein? Does he learn sooner? Does a lodger crack and say it? Does he rot? Does he notice how so very cold he is. How animals act around him? It's all very interesting,,

I actually did think a bit of Jekyll's kidnappers for the amnesia kidnapping au! When drawing that lil sketch of Henry and O'Leary meeting Robert I had considered making it so O'Leary was suspicious of Lanyon like "Oh theres no news anywhere of someone matching Thomas' description who's missing. But some random people walk up claiming to know him? Begging to take him back with them?" And he'd think they were the kidnappers. But ultimately I decided against it as I felt Lanyon and Rachel were pretty clearly, genuinely concerned for "Thomas" :p

I tried playing assassins creed once, the first(?) one. But the controls were confusing and everything was sorta thrown all at me at once, and I got bored of it quickly

But! I went to the store the other day and just so happened to notice Syndicate was being sold for 15 dollars 👀 So I bought it because funky Victorian assassins and your influence! It's a bit less confusing then the first ac game I tried but why is going down or dropping so hard bdksnks. I'm having quite a bit of fun! If you dont count my rage and annoyance-, the B button refuses to cooperate with me unless I'm looting corpses >:(

The b button being the bane of my existence aside, I AM having fun! I like the funky outfits and I want to play as the girl twin (evie?) forever because her clothes are good and shes better at attacking than jacob(?) For some reason. Probably the stun her weapon has? Oh well! I have not unlocked any new outfits yet, nonetheless I wish there were more.

Also! I was thimking, and my current quests are taking place at 1868? Did I get that right? And Jekyll is like 35 in 1885. So in game he'd be 18! An au like I believe you mentioned sounds very interesting 👀 but I must play more to know what's going on and daydream about it

That would be the resurrection au <3

But god, I really like that branch! Especially combined with the hc that he can't feel pain bc the HJ7 and the transformations made him immune. Frankenstein patched him up and made fleshweaver to heal the crack in his skull but it still has to be bandaged, he surely broke a few bones, yet all he has to do is to be careful because it doesn't even hurt. He doesn't even realize how severe the injuries are because it doesn't hurt, it very well might just have been that he accidentally slipped at the bottom of the staircase and accidentally hit his head on the railing during his fall, rather than getting physically pushed and flying down the stairs, shattering his skull upon impact with the marble floor. Y'know what would be extra fun? If he only starts getting a bit suspicious about how severe the injury was once he realizes his lungs stop breathing for minutes at a time when he gets distracted, or his heartbeat stops dead in his chest. I know that that's not how biology or even creature works but lets say the HJ7 is funky, Zombie Jekyll my beloved. Perhaps he would only fully grasp what had happened once he blacked out too much and 'passed out', but his soul slipped out enough to leave his body unconscious on the floor while his soul/ghost was just... Watching. And it's not until Maijabi (who, as you said, follows him everywhere) immediately calls for more Lodgers saying that Henry's soul is getting unstable and Frankenstein's lousy job is starting to shine through that he fully understands that it was not a mere hit to the head. Or maybe it is when days, weeks, maybe months has passed and the headache never goes away, he only feels how his body starts feeling so much more... Fragile and delicate, that the guilt has eaten Helsby up alive and he corners him and spills everything, knowing he is going directly against what the group agreed to but not being able to keep it a secret much longer-- or maybe Creature would tell him immediately, once Henry is, for once, alone perhaps days after the initial accident. He cannot see Henry struggle to understand what is going on when he already knows what's happening to Henry, his mind, and his body. He doesn't listen to the plan that Frankenstein and the Lodgers has set up and immediately tells Henry the first moment they are alone. That would certainly be horrifying, I can only imagine how the Lodgers would find Henry after that, once he actually knows and manages to process everything. He would be so mad, not only to have been killed in the first place, but also because he was robbed of an afterlife because the Lodgers were selfish and could not accept the consequences of their actions. He would be mad, he would be so pissed and I have no doubt he might actually be mad at Maijabi too for even agreeing to help Frankenstein and the rest of the Lodgers. That anger would not stay long, though. That anger would soon turn into misery and sadness and paranoia so even as Henry has tried to push Maijabi away, Henry still ends up on his doorstep begging him to help him make sure he is not rotting, because no matter what anyone says, he is sure he can see rotten spots and patches on his skin and he is just so scared and jdhfjsdfdsfsfs... <3

Ooooooohhh, I was actually daydreaming about this just this morning! Granted, I woke up at 5 and began to daydream to fall asleep quicker but I still like the thought of O'Leary being suspicious of Robert/Rachel/Jasper/the Lodgers bc he is protective of 'Thomas' and doesn't want anything bad to happen to him and especially with the idea that Henry still has hallucinations and they both think he was abandoned by his family, left to rot at a mental asylum. O'Leary might very well think that it might be Henry's friends and family that dumped him that Henry had 'escaped' the hospital and that's why they knew he was missing since the Asylum itself obviously wouldn't have posted the news... I really liked Jeks idea, okay? Like a lot, I absolutely love it <3

Oh, the oldest AC game I played was Unity bc it was free after the Notre Dame fire, and I can confirm, I played 15 min and could not get through it even if i would have wanted to, it absolutely sucks so i have no doubt the older games are just as frustrating <3

BUT!!!! I'M SO GLAD MY CORRUPTION IS SPREADING AND YOU BOUGHT AND PLAYED IT AND ARE ENJOYING IT SO FAR!!! Trust me, Syndicate truly is an absolutely amazing game and is definitely one of my top 3 games of all time. I sometimes play it w my friend watching me play and trust me, I know that rage of trying to do smt but the character does smt else... or you try to do smt but the game doesn't react and you miss your chance... Oh well, still a wonderful game <3

My friend loves to play as Evie as well but I'm definitely playing Jacob every chance I get and I honestly get a lil pissy when I have to play as Evie bc I always prefer to play male characters, plus, I just like Jacob better bc he is a sweetheart. He is also canonically bisexual as hell!!! Have you met Abberline yet? The police officer? Him and Jacob together is one of my fave ships for the game. I also bought the ultimate/golden/whatever name it was edition so I had a bunch of extra outfits, I love the sherlock holmes outfit for Jacob but my friend keeps bullying me for it </3

Honestly? The time difference is the bane of my entire idea for the au bc if it's during their time Henry hasn't even graduated yet, and definitely not well-known enough for them to actively meet for whatever reason, and if you use the timeline for the jack the ripper dlc (in 1888) a lot of... Less than pleasant things happen so it wouldn't really make a lot of sense for a crossover to happen at that point but maybe it's just bc im a pussy and refuse to play the dlc. Rn, while imagining the au, I just imagine the 1868 timeline to be the same as the TGS timeline. I like to imagine the Frye Twins hearing about Henry and the Society and promptly breaking into his office to ask him to make poison and stuff for them. I also have a feeling that Jacob would flirt wildly with Henry and that Henry would be less-than-amused. It would also be a very fun thing with the fact that there would be two Henrys, with TGS Henry Jekyll and AC Syndicate Henry Green, soo... XD

#Man I really want to hear your journey through syndicate!!!#Oh man I cant wait until you meet Maxwell #and Crawford for that matter #he was the guy I based the crawford in the fic off of bc i had no idea what else to do <3 #OHH there would also be a lot of mixup with Lucy Thorne and TGS Queen Lucy #oh i can imagine them being rivals #that would be fun <3 #ask #darling-dolly-darlene #banshees au #resurrection au #amnesia kidnapping au

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v-hope · 5 years

Text

Someone speaks badly about you on a show

—and they defend you, ofc.

Pairings: OT7 x Reader

Genre: I guess fluff for default, angst

Request by @ally22042000: "Hey, I saw that request for reactions are open. Can I have one with the boys ( just Yoongi and JK if all of them are to much), where they are at an award show or interview or something like that and someone talks disrespectfull about the reader? Thx so much💜 and have a nice day."

A/N: I hope this is what you had in mind, I enjoyed writing these 💕 Also, you're an idol in a couple of them and in the rest you're not. I hope you like it!

Kim Seokjin

Your boyfriend absolutely lived for whenever he got asked to be an MC at award shows.

So, naturally, he was very hyped up once he was handed his lines and had to go up on stage with two other idols – one of them being his good friend of many years, and the other one being a new artist who had debuted last year.

It was simple. Read the cards. Just read the goddamn paper notes you had been given and that was it. But, apparently, the idol by his side was way too new to this whole thing, for instead of reading what he had been handed to, he fixed his eyes on Jin to his side.

"Thank God I got to be with the fun one of your relationship".

Seokjin's eyes went to lock with his out of instinct, having not really processed what had just happened yet.

"The fun one?" his eyebrows furrowed.

"Yeah" the idol nodded his head. "Y/N would've made this so boring".

Jin glanced for a brief second to his friend, as if to verify he had heard just the same and his mind wasn't making it up – his awkward expression itself doing that for him.

Nonetheless, as much as he wanted to snap at him, he decided to be the better one, maybe just because he knew he was still live and didn't want to make a scene right in front of everyone.

That didn't stop him from putting him in his place though.

"Then you clearly haven't had the pleasure to meet her and witness her high class humour" Jin spoke into the camera, later placing his eyes on his friend. "Don't you think, hyung-nim?"

"I have never laughed harder than with her, Seokjin-ssi" he replied immediately.

And then out of nowhere, Jin dug his hand in his pocket, throwing multiple heart shaped red papers that had everyone screaming in a second. "Love you, baby. Don't let anyone tell you you're not funny".

What's the saying? Kill 'em with kindness? Well, Seokjin had just slayed that poor guy's soul.

Min Yoongi

"Hey, it's BTS!" the MC greeted cheerfully once the seven guys came on the shot.

One by one, they went up to her to give her a quick hug before they took their place standing next to her.

Up until then, everything was fine, and maybe things would've remained that way if she had just said nothing after Yoongi hugged her. Instead, she laughed, catching him off guard.

"At least you are polite" she shook her head in amusement.

Yoongi pouted naturally because of his confusion. "Who of us hasn't been polite?"

"Oh, no. Not you" she shook her head one more time, only to clarify: "Your girlfriend".

"Y/N-ssi?" Hobi was the one to ask on his hyung's behalf, being just as puzzled as everyone else by that statement.

At the nod of confirmation coming from the MC, Yoongi brought the microphone up to his lips. "But you've never even met her, where'd you get that from?"

"The video of her not even looking at the paps taking pictures... when you were at the airport the other day".

Yoongi's hold on the mic tightened, suddenly becoming protective of you. "So just because she's a private person she's impolite?"

"She didn't even acknowledge your fans. Come on, that was just very–"

"She's not an idol" he cut her off. "She doesn't have to put up with all of this, especially when she's not comfortable with all the attention".

"She should've known this would happen when she decided to date you".

"Guys…" Namjoon tried to stop both of them from arguing any further, for they had apparently forgotten they were still live.

But Yoongi was already done, slightly shaking his head before he put an end to it for once and for all: "She's given up enough for me already, I'm not asking her to be all bubbly around paps or our fans when she clearly isn't comfortable with it. If that's impolite to you then go off, I guess, but I'm the one dating her and I know better".

On to the next topic now.

Jung Hoseok

"Hoseok!" the girl interviewing them read effusively on her phone.

They had been interviewed person by person that day, since a few influencers had gotten the chance to record short clips with BTS to upload to their social media. This one, so far, had been one of their favourites, for its dynamics consisted in nothing but the young woman going through her Twitter reading fan questions or just letting them know about cute comments they had made.

However, that was soon to change when she caught Hobi's attention, continuing: "I loved you in the concert last week, I got to meet Y/N and she was the cu– oh, irrelevant much?" she mumbled with a small, breathy laugh, before dismissing the topic and scrolling down in search of another tweet.

Hoseok's eyebrows knitted together. "Wha–"

"Oh, here's a good one" she smiled as if nothing had happened, as if she had not heard him; having the seven men exchange uncomfortable glances. "Jimin, you and your girlfriend are such couple goals, I can't w–"

"Um…" Hoseok cut her off, stealing a quick glance to Jimin, who looked just as out of it, before his eyes fell back on the girl's. "How come Jimin's girlfriend is worth talking of and mine isn't?"

"She's an idol" she answered as if it was evident.

His jaw tightened. "So people are only worthy when they're famous now?"

"Well, no..." she uselessly tried to fix it.

"Then I believe you should respect her enough not to call her irrelevant or skip comments at the mention of her".

"But there's nothing interesting about Y/N anyway, so…"

That was all Hobi needed to turn his head to look at his members before he shook his head in defeat. "We're done here, guys. I'm not listening to any more of this nonsense".

Neither were they, which is why they were all soon to follow your boyfriend out of there.

Kim Namjoon

"So, Namjoon-ah" the entertainer's eyes focused on him, "I watched a few pictures of you at your girlfriend's graduation the other day" he smiled. "You guys looked so cute!"

A big smile spread over Joon's lips, recalling the pride he had felt that day because of you, being the happiest to have been able to be there for you.

"Aw, thank you" he said truthfully, his dimples making their appearance. "I'm really proud of her".

"You are?" the man asked.

Now, there were two ways to say those words. One with a genuinely intrigued tone, and one that was looking to offend. In this case, given not only his tone but also the way his eyebrows had raised in impression, it had been clear to everyone present that his intention had been the latter.

"I am" he stated simply, hoping that would be as much as the host would say about the topic before he moved on to the next one.

It was not.

"Don't you ever wish you were with someone more successful though?"

Namjoon's jaw tightened visibly, his eyes turning colder. "What does that even mean?"

"I'm just saying, you're Kim Namjoon" the man shifted on his seat. "Worldwide known idol, producer, rapper… whereas she's just… ordinary".

The way he had said that last word made it seem like being like that was the worst of things, and Namjoon did not like it one bit.

"Her achievements are just as important as mine" he was fast to talk in your defence. "Just because she isn't a part of the idol industry doesn't mean her dreams and passions are any less worthy of recognition than mine".

That alone had the interviewer apologising in a second, realising then how bad he had messed up. Because, in all honesty, Namjoon couldn't really care any less about you being famous or not – he would always be proud of you and your achievements no matter what.

Park Jimin

"Ah, Park Jimin!" the host exclaimed after a picture of you had popped up on the screen in between them. "You really got lucky with this one, didn't you?"

That sure did bring a bright smile to his lips, for he absolutely lived for these moments, when people acknowledged how beautiful you were.

Nonetheless, that smile of his was soon erased when the same guy added: "You should control her more, though".

With that and a frown adorning your boyfriend's face, the picture previously displaying on the screen was gone and replaced with one of you in a night dress from two days ago instead.

"Control her more?" Jimin asked through gritted teeth.

"Yeah" he nodded his head. "She has a boyfriend now, she can't go around looking that hot, it might get the wrong attention".

Now, Jimin himself hadn't really liked it when you went out dressed like that, but he was your boyfriend, so he did have some kind of right to feel a little jealous of other guys thirsting over his girlfriend when she was out alone with her friends, didn't he?

This guy, however? Neither what he said was appropriate on so many levels, nor did he have the right to talk about you and your outfit like that.

"I think you should think before you speak and induce people to have unhealthy relationships" your boyfriend spoke in a low, calm voice.

Controlling you? What kind of bullshit was that?

"Come on now, I was joking" the man brushed it off with a laugh, and a very nervous one at that.

"Were you really?" Jimin raised one of his eyebrows, not believing a word. "Even if you were" he went on before the guy could open his mouth to reply, "you should maybe reflect on yourself and, instead of telling me how to treat my girlfriend because of how provocative she looks, think of why you, a guy who's over his forties, thinks that way of someone who could easily be his daughter".

He had not been rude. He had not raised his voice. Yet he did somehow manage to look so fucking scary to the man in front.

Kim Taehyung

"Y/N?" the interviewer asked in disbelief, only to scoff after receiving a nod of confirmation from Tae. "Of course she'd end up with one of you guys".

Not only did Taehyung's eyebrows furrow in that moment, but so did everyone else's – his members exchanging dumbfounded looks as your boyfriend looked to the guy in front dead in the eye.

"One of us?"

"Mhm" the guy replied simply. "She always seems to be with whoever is the most famous at the moment, so..." he shrugged.

"She's only been with other two people?" Taehyung raised one of his eyebrows.

"Who just so happened to be the moment's sensation" he reminded him. "And now she's with you".

"You can't help who you fall for" your boyfriend's stare became colder by the second.

"She's just going to break things off with you as soon as your moment of fame passes".

That was it.

"Okay, no" his voice came out like pure venom. "If she broke up with them, it's merely because they were both complete assholes to her".

"Taehyung…" Namjoon discreetly squeezed his wrist from his side.

"No, hyung" he shook his head before fixing his enraged eyes back on the interviewer. "She's the sweetest person there is, it's not her fault us guys fall for her. And it's not her fault either to have dated guys who don't deserve her. She did well to dump them, and I know she won't leave me just because of my fame's status".

And then, as everyone in the room remained silent, being absolutely perplexed by such situation, he shook his head in disappointment once again at the sight of the guy's desperate attempt to come up with something else to say.

"You know" he beat him to it, "for such an overrated interviewer, you are so goddamn misinformed".

Good thing this would get bleeped out by the editors later, that if they ever wanted this to air at all.

Jeon Jeongguk

"It's been a while since we last were together, hasn't it?" the host spoke after they had all sat down on the sofa placed in front of her. "A lot has happened since then…" a cheeky grin curved up her lips when her eyes fell on Jeongguk, "like the maknae finally getting himself a girlfriend?"

A shy bunny smile didn't wait to part Guk's lips, meanwhile his six hyungs started being chaotic like they, by this point, always were.

"He did" Namjoon was the one to answer for him, fondly patting his shoulder.

"Well, congratulations! It was about time you got someone" the woman said with a smile. "Though I must admit I never thought I'd see you with someone like her".

Your boyfriend's previous smile was replaced by slightly parted lips. "Someone like her?"

"I mean" the woman tried to get her point across, "you've said multiple times that IU is your ideal type, and Y/N's just…" she scrunched her nose in a displeased manner, "she's not exactly…"

Oh, no. There was no way in hell Jeongguk was letting her finish that sentence; the idea itself making him mad. That was the reason his shy side was long gone, being replaced by his protective one instead, which had quickly taken over him.

"She's stunning" Guk spoke in a low, determined voice. "IU is just a celebrity crush. Y/N's the woman I am in love with" he established without hesitation. "I really don't understand why you're bringing this up".

Although taken aback by Jeongguk's sudden way with his words, not having expected such outburst coming from the quietest member when it came to interviews, the woman went on:

"I'm just sayin–"

"No" Guk cut her off, shaking his head hastily, "you have nothing to say about my preferences, you don't get a say on us".

End of conversation.

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