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interstellar-changkyun · 3 years

Text

you’re jealous | monsta x ot7 reactions

maybe some smut ;)

shownu | son hyunwoo

shownu has been going on variety shows to promote the group’s latest comeback and the female hosts and guests always comment on his looks

it doesn’t bother you usually, you know he’s handsome and love when he gets all flustered from the attention, but you don’t like how the hosts feel up his arms and ogle him when he performs a part of the choreo

they continue to dote on him and jealousy crawls up your throat and takes over your body as you wait for shownu to come home

he comes home earlier than usual and you would be happy if the images of women touching up his arms weren’t flashing in your mind, clouding your vision

he greets you with a kiss to the cheek and your arms are crossed and you’re pouting, still quiet

only when he’s setting down his stuff does he ask what’s wrong giving you time to look away from his sweaty chiseled chest and focus on your anger

“i saw the show today.” a beat of silence

“oh? was it fun?” he was almost done now as he grew closer to you

“it would’ve been if those women weren’t touching you up...” shownu found it adorable when you were jealous so he couldn’t help but put his arms around your waist and pull your back to his chest, resting his head on your shoulders. you could feel his muscles against you, was he not wearing a shirt any more? it didn’t matter you were angry

“i told them to stop but they cut that out of the show...” your anger subsided, of course he did. you turned in his arms then, properly looking him in the eyes for the first time today.

“good.”

“you’re cute when you’re jealous,” he kissed your nose and you blushed, for a second he thought he outta make you jealous more often but he couldn’t bare even trying to give anyone that kind of attention when he had you. “let me make it up to you,” he started kissing your lips then, his hands roaming down your body as the found your ass and lifted you up, instinctively your legs went around his waist

he was sweaty so u offered to shower with him to save water of course, he thanked you for that with his actions...

wonho | shin hoseok

wonho was performing WITH YOU and you couldn’t help but feel jealous as the beautiful female dancer moved in synch with him and his hands traced her body

you rarely got jealous, he did that enough for both of you, but you couldn’t help it when fans were saying how good they looked together and of course they didn’t know he was already taken

the tweets, instagram posts, even tiktoks of them together consumed you and you finally came to your breaking point when wonho came home from the music show

“enough hoseok i can’t take it any more!”

“what’s wrong?” he had never seen you so upset, a mix of frustration and sadness adorned your face

“you and your dancer, everywhere i look online i just see you two together and i know it’s not real but when everyone’s telling you they would be good together i-“

“baby they don’t know what’s real and what’s for the performance, at the end of the day i came home to you and love you, i don’t even have her number on my phone much less have her saved as my lock screen like i do you,” wonho grinned and you felt the anxiety leave your body slowly. he always knew how to calm me down and when he realized you weren’t as mad he opened his arms for a hug which you fell into with a small pout still on your face

“can i make it up to my baby?” you didn’t know what he had in mind and you certainly didn’t expect being handcuffed to your bed frame screaming his name as he ate you out until you came...three times

kihyun

kihyun wasn’t naturally flirty, just too kind to know he could be perceived as flirty so when a girl trips in front of him and he helps her up like the gentlemen he is she gets the wrong idea and starts flirting with him...in front of you

you let it go on as he obliviously responds to her intrusive questions, you were grateful she didn’t recognize him with his mask and beanie on but you still felt your possessiveness rearing it’s ugly head

“we need to get going honey,” you cut in, having had enough of this girl just when she’s about to ask YOUR boyfriend for his number and she stutters and apologizes, you just mutter an okay as you grab kihyun’s hand and walk away

kihyun laughs as he catches up to you

“aww someone got jealous.”

“not jealous just annoyed, how could you not tell she was flirting?” you frowned at him and he smirked, oh no he’s gonna tease the hell out of you now

“i can only tell when you flirt with me, but what if i was flirting with her? would you get mad? and if i fucked her?” he whispered the last part, since you were still very much in public.

“kihyun,” you groaned as his hold on your hand tightened. you knew where this was going, knew exactly what this tone in his voice would lead to. but honestly you didn’t care, not when you were just as territorial as him and wanted to feel like his in the most physical way.

“would you beg for me back?” kihyun, pulled you flush against him and whispered into your ear and you couldn’t help but hold onto his shoulder for strength, he knew what he did to you.

“you know i would.”

“you look so pretty when you beg, maybe i’ll go get her number.” you were whining at this point, still very much in public, he drove you crazy.

“fuck me please kihyun.” and that’s all it took before you were rushing to the nearest bathroom like a bunch of horny teenagers, and kihyun was making you cry and scream his name.

minhyuk

being an mc on a music show meant he interacted with lots of idols and you always anticipated the influx of delusional fans assuming he’s dating any girl idol he has any interaction with but one day is different from the others

he’s doing his usual mc duties but this kpop idol is staring at him intensely, even as going as far as telling him he’s handsome

she’s much older but it doesn’t stop the influx of tweets and comments

minhyuk is handsome you know that, anyone with eyesight can see that so when he comes home you can’t help but be grumpy

you can’t be mad at him you know that but your feelings are your feelings

he knows as soon as he’s home what’s making you grumpy

“babe i can’t help it!”

“ i know it’s just-why are you so handsome??? cover your face or something argh” you’re not really angry at him and he knows that as he kisses your face until the pout drops from your lips and he kisses you

you’re still feeling annoyed so you make it a point to show minhyuk just how much he is yours as you are his, making him scream your name all night long

hyungwon

like kihyun he doesn’t realize people assume he’s flirting when he’s kind just because he’s handsome

you’re out with him in vacation in greece and hyungwon is helping these japanese tourists with directions because he overhears them being confused about the hotel names, they assume he’s flirting with them since they don’t see you standing, waiting for him under the shade of the store front

hyungwon politely declines their offer to join him back at their hotel and you unfortunately hear the entire conversation, not once did he mention you

you scoff and walk off as he walks back to you, his eyebrows raising in shock

“woah what’s wrong?” he catches up to you with ease, damn his long legs.

“why don’t you go ask your new friends since i don’t exist?” you glare at him and he smirks, the handsome fucker smirks

“jealous babe?”

“why would i be, not like i’m your girlfriend or anything.” you grumble and he laughs at how you’re the angriest he’s seen you in a while. the last time you were this angry it was at netizens for attacking him over some dumb thing.

“i didn’t tell them because they could have recognized me and that wouldn’t have been good for anyone,” that made a lot of sense, maybe you had reacted too strongly. you might just be angry about other people flirting with what’s yours more than anything.

“you’re hot when you’re angry though, maybe i should do that more often.” you stopped in your tracks and narrowed your eyes even more at him, you pulled him into the side alley, pushing him against the building side.

“you won’t.” you shut up with a kiss and he was smirking into your kiss, his hands roaming down your body and you had to pull away and remind yourself you were not in your hotel room. after that you both stumbled and practically ran back to your hotel.

jooheon

jooheon is pretty well known for his unabashed displays of aegyo and so when he goes on a variety show it’s not surprising he’s asked to do it

unfortunately this show is hosted by a female idol and her reaction sends netizens into delusional theories that the two are surely dating

you’re so upset by the rumors and allegations that you start to believe them so when jooheon sees you two days after the rumors started you’re crying at your place

he’s so worried he pulls you to him automatically and asks repeatedly what happened and what’s wrong, not even thinking for a second it could be related to the rumors

finally you manage to stop crying and get out, “it’s okay if you love her too if she makes you happier i’ll understand.”

“what the hell are you talking about?” jooheon is so dumbfounded by your statement he stops soothing you and this makes you go back to crying

“you and that kpop idol on the variety show it’s all over the internet.”

“you idiot i would never date much less love anyone other than you.” you just stop crying at look at him through your tears, which you furiously wipe away again and see the sincerity on his face.

“oh.”

“yes oh i can’t believe you even believed them.” jooheon scoffs and gets off the bed you were both sat on, and then out of nowhere he picks you up and takes you to the bathroom

“we’re taking a bath so my baby can feel better,” the relaxing bath turns to a little more when he can’t but show how much he missed you the past couple days and just how much he loves you more than anyone else

I.M | im changkyun

people expected changkyun to be the bad bitch in your relationship, he had sharp features, a deep voice, piercings, and an amazing body but everyone who knew you both knew you were the one who would slice a bitch

especially if a random girl is trying to dance on your man in the one nightclub everyone knows he’s taken in, this nightclub had cut some kind of nondisclosure deal with the idols and their companies but clearly this girl was new, however, that didn’t mean you would hold back

changkyun winced as she started to dance on him and backed away, but she was persistent as she turned around and tried again, he waved his hand in front of her, clearly disinterested

you didn’t want to step in but as you monitored the situation where you danced with jooheon you could tell changkyun was struggling to remain polite

but you didn’t have a reputation to maintain and you certainly weren’t as calm and collected as your boyfriend

in a couple seconds you were wedging yourself between her and your boyfriend

“i’d back away sweetie,” you painted on your best fake smile and changkyun let out a sigh of relief.

“who are you?” her voice and tone was unpleasant, it was all too unpleasant especially when you were trying your best not to break her

“i’m his girlfriend,”

“let’s let him pick,” she shoved you away and stepped closer to changkyun, and that’s when you know you’re about to end up at the police station...again

changkyun stops you by grabbing your waist and hauling you over his shoulder as you’re lunging for her hair

shownu appears out of nowhere and asks the girl to kindly fuck off in the way shownu just knows how to do

when you’re outside and the driver has pulled up to the club, changkyun sets you down, he looks partially amused but mostly concerned

he knows you hate it when other people flirt with him just like he has to stop himself from breaking the jaw of any guy who dances on you at the club

he pushes the hair out of your face and looks at you fondly, you just nod at him to let him know you’re okay, too lost in his eyes to find words at the moment

and then the driver is opening the door for you and you both shuffle into the very back row of the minivan

changkyun presses a kiss to your temple, and you lean into his side

“you’re so fucking sexy when you get like that, i know i shouldn’t encourage it but fuck,” changkyun whispers into your hair and you shiver as his deep voice sends chills through you, you let your hand travel from its place on his lap to where the leather of his pants is becoming strained

“don’t.” he hisses and you aren’t in the obedient mood as you look him straight in the eyes and continue your torture

you estimate you have about thirty mins to go to get home, the privacy screen between the driver and the back of the car won’t muffle all the sound of you both but you can at least remind changkyun who he belongs to

so when you’re done making him suffer in his leather pants, you unzip them and he’s hissing and grabbing your hand

“fuck babe,” you just smirk at him and then spit in your hand. changkyun groans and throws his head back against the headrest, soon enough you’re leaning down and taking him into your mouth and he’s whining your name in between strings of curses. you manage to finish him off before you even get home.

changkyun gets back at you and you’re sure the entire apartment complex knows his name now

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all-my-love-for-harry · 4 years

Text

Don’t shout.

summary: Harry doesn't know what to do after he lied to Y/N.

word count: 1.7k

based on these requests:

"fuck i didn’t mean to send that haha okay for ‘shy little boy’ can u do something where yn and harry fight over him going to a girls house while on tour (but she’s a friend) when he gets back home yn ignores him bc she found out n stuff (the kid is not home i can’t remember his name srry) hope this makes sense"

and

"How about when Harry and y/n fight and Artemis thinks they are going to break up but he doesn't want Harry to leave him. I love you writing. Artemis is sooo cute uWu."

and

"hey idk if you’re taking requests but i was wondering if you could do one where you and harry get into an argument where he makes you cry and artemis sees and gets mad at harry and won’t talk to him until harry apologizes to you,, ty !!"

and

"where y/n and harry have there first big fight"

and

"For the my shy little boy series, could you do one where y/n and Harry fight about something and Artemis gets upset at one of them as well?"

a/n: had to change the requests a bit but i hoped they worked together!! I enjoy writing angst so i liked doing this one :)

you can find more of my shy little boy here

*:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･: *:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･:

Y/N was never one to pick up a fight. She was the type of person who preferred bottle up her feelings, most of the time. Usually she didn't have drama in her life aside from the occasional four-year-old tantrums and stuff, but then again she hasn't dated anyone in what felt like years. And she has never dated a famous person before, so every day she learned something new.

Like how trust is the most fundamental part of a relationship. She couldn't believe every little thing that was put in the internet about him, as eighty percent of it was all fake information. So she always trusted Harry and waited for his side of things before jumping to any conclusions.

However, this time, she couldn't do that. Not when dozens of pictures of him leaving one of his ex-girlfriend's house with the same clothes from the day before where all over the internet. She couldn't care less about that part, to be honest. What she was hurt about was the fact that Harry told her he was at his hotel and wasn't going to go out that night.

She knew Harry had friends, a lot of them were women. And she was no one to tell him who he could and could not hang out with. What she felt betrayed about was that he lied about it.

Now, Y/N considered herself a very mature person. But this time she allowed to feel angry and ignored every call of Harry's, not being in the mood to talk to him after she saw those pictures.

When he was back to London, he already had figured what was the problem. And he couldn't blame Y/N for ignoring him either, so as soon as he landed, Harry went straight to Y/N's home, determined to give her an explanation.

Y/N opened the door, raising an eyebrow at him but let him in anyway. She turned around and walked to the kitchen, completely ignoring him. Harry closed the door behind him and followed her, knowing her silence was anything but a good sign.

"Where's Artemis?" He asked softly, trying to make small conversation.

"His room." She murmured, raising a glass of water up to her mouth to drink from it.

"Are you mad at me?" He already knew the answer, but he didn't know how to bring up the subject. All he received was a bitter laugh from her. "I'm sorry..."

"For what? Because you lied to me or because you got caught?"

"Caught? Nothing happened, Y/N."

"Then why did you lied to me?!" She almost slammed the glass on the kitchen island, growing really angry. "Why you didn't tell me you were with her?"

"I didn't want you to be mad." He murmured, like a little kid who was being scolded.

"And how do you think i am right now? Uh?" Crossing her arms over her chest, Y/N stared at him. "I trust you, Harry. Every day, all the time. All i ever ask from you is honesty. What happens when i can't even get that?"

Harry panicked for a second, not knowing if she was going to break up with him over this. "Please, tell me how i can make it better."

"Start with telling me why you lied." She demanded. "And don't say because you didn't want to upset me because i'm not buying that. I called you the night before those pictures were taken. You told me you were at your hotel room, was that even true?"

He nodded furiously. "I was at my room when i called you. I swear."

"You told me you were gonna take a shower then you'd call again to wish Artemis a good night, but you never did. Harry, i called you, three times and you didn't answer. Here i was thinking you were so tired of working you fell asleep when in reality you were at you ex's house doing god knows what!" A single tear rolled down her left eye, breaking Harry's heart.

"She called me. She had broken up with her boyfriend and needed a friend." He said. "We drank a little, that's why i couldn't drive back to the hotel. I slept in her couch. Nothing happened, baby, you have to believe me."

"I'm not worried about you cheating, Harry. I worry about you lying to me. How can i trust you if you don't tell me the truth?" More tears fell from her eyes. "I don't want to be that type of girlfriend, but i thought we could tell each other everything."

"And we can, god, we can. I'm sorry, so sorry, baby."

"Were you still going to tell me even if those pictures didn't come out?" She asked. Her lip was trembling as she waited for him to answer, however, Harry stayed silent. "That's what i thought."

She tried to walk out of the kitchen, but Harry wrapped his hand around her wrist gently, stopping her from leaving. But Y/N was too hurt right now to react properly, so she snapped. "Don't!"

"Mummy?" A much smaller, scared voice was heard, making both adults swallow hard. "Why are you crying?" Artemis was confused when he saw the tears on his mother' face, but then his eyes landed on Harry. Under any other circumstances, he'd jump on his arms, excited he was back home. But he was quick to put two and two together, and he instantly blamed Harry for his mummy's tears. So he furrowed, stepping in front of Y/N to take a good look at her.

"Hey, baby. Were you there long?" Y/N asked him, running a hand through his soft curls. Artemis shook his head. He didn't heard much, and what he heard he didn't understand. Just that his mum was shouting and Harry was apologizing for something. "Let's go back to your room, okay?"

She took his hand and guided him back to his room, staying with him for a little bit to show him she was okay. She knew Harry wouldn't leave, especially not after a fight, but she wasn’t sure she could keep fighting with him once she came out.

Harry made the decision to make lunch for them, hoping Y/N would be willing to talk to him. He knew Artemis was now mad at him too, and Harry felt so bad for upsetting his two loves. God only knows how protective Artemis is of his mum.

He didn’t even know why he couldn’t answer Y/N’s last question. He didn’t think paparazzi would take pictures of him entering and exiting his ex-girlfriend’s house, or that Y/N would react in that way. But he also understood how bad it looked from her perspective.

“You’re still here.” He heard her voice from behind.

“I’d never leave while we’re like this.” Harry turned to look at her, furrowing when he saw her red eyes. “I never meant to upset you.” She nodded, staying quiet. “I know how the world makes it look every time I’m out with someone from the opposite sex, I’ve been targeted as the biggest player for that.”

“Those things are not true.”

“And you know that. But… in my past relationships, they didn’t believe me. They’d automatically assume the worst, that’s why I didn’t want you to find out. I didn’t want the opinion you have of me to change. I’m truly sorry.”

Y/N sighed. She looked at him in the eye and could see how vulnerable Harry was allowing himself to be right now, how honest and regretful his eyes looked.

“You’re a good friend, and a good boyfriend. That’s what I think of you. Harry, you don’t have to lie or hide things from me. I know nothing happened, I trust you in that. Just, please, be honest with me. I don’t want to find out of things when there’s already millions of pictures online, I want to hear the truth from you so we can save arguments like these.”

Harry nodded furiously, again. “I promise, it won’t happen again. I’m sorry.”

“I forgive you.” She stated. Harry walked towards her and pulled her for a tight hug, squeezing her close to his chest and sighing in relief. “But Artemis is kind of upset too.”

“I should go apologize to him too. We shouldn’t have been fighting with him in the house.”

“Go talk to him, I’ll finish this.” She pointed at the almost done meal Harry was cooking.

He obeyed, making his way towards the little boy’s room. The door wasn’t entire closed but he still knocked before entering. “Hey.” He said softly, but Artemis didn’t answer. “I’m sorry you heard that, monkey.”

“You made my mummy cry.” He stated, crossing his little arms across his chest, looking exactly like Y/N while doing it. “You have to apologize.”

“I already did, kiddo. Mummy and I have talked, now I want to say sorry to you, for upsetting you.” Harry knelt in front of him.

“Are you gonna leave?” He said, his mood drastically changed as his eyes filled with tears.

Harry was confused by the question, but was quick to assure him. “Of course not. Everything’s fine, monkey. Adults fight sometimes, but I’m not gonna leave, ever.”

“That’s what my teacher told Susie but her dad doesn’t live with her anymore.” He rubbed his eyes with his little fists, whipping his tears.

“But that’s not us, Artemis. I’m here, do you see? I’m never gonna leave you or your mummy.”

“Promise?” Artemis offered him his right pinky and Harry wrapped his much bigger one around it without hesitation.

“You have my word.”

They hugged, Artemis wrapped his little arms around his neck, applying a little pressure as he was still afraid Harry would leave him. But in response, Harry just squeezed him closer to him. He sat on the floor with Artemis on his lap, letting him calm down as he cooed at him.

“I love you.” Harry barely heard the words, as Artemis spoke above a whisper, still pressed to Harry’s tattooed chest.

But he still heard. And he couldn’t help the dimpled smile from appearing on his face. He loved this boy more than he could ever begin to describe, and the reassurance that the feeling was mutual was always something Harry loved to hear.

He kissed the top of his head, brushing some blonde curls out of his small face so he could look directly at his hazel eyes. “Not as much as I love you.”

☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁

taglist!!

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#harry styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #harry styles one shot #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fluff #harry styles fic #harry styles angst #harry styles x you #dad!harry #stepdad!harry #harry styles fanfiction

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roger-that-cap · 3 years

Text

meet me in the gardens

knight!natasha x noble!fem!reader

summary: being the widow of a decently wealthy lord and sitting on a large plot of land automatically meant that you were a candidate for the program that you couldn’t say not to; the hosting. you had to sponsor a knight and keep them in your home for an entire year, which was troublesome enough on its own. but you never expected yoru knight to be a woman, and you certainly didn’t expect to have a full on illegal love affair with her, either.

warnings: actually none but a misunderstanding and the lack of editing that i think u guys may or may not be used to at this point

word count: 5.3k

part two!!

The knight before you was the opposite of a man. She was so opposite in fact, that you had to actively make yourself not appear like you were shocked. You knew that the twins were having to try even harder to keep composure.

She was without a doubt, one of the prettiest people you had ever seen before. Being a lady, you had seen so many handsome young men and gorgeous young women, but there wasn’t one who’s fairness struck you like this woman’s. Her eyes were an unfamiliar shade of blue, and you knew that they were the kind of eyes that were made for surveillance and observation, and if you looked hard enough, maybe a window to her thoughts. She had pink lips that were set into a genuine yet thin smile, almost like she wasn’t used to wordless pleasantries at all. Her hair was cropped just above her shoulders and it shined a brilliant red that you had rarely ever seen. Despite the powerful and extremely potent energy that she was giving off, she was short, shorter than you, but something told you that she was strong. Stronger than anyone knew quite yet, but you could feel it. But, you were still confused, regardless of how she had rendered you breathless for the quickest of seconds.

The problem wasn’t that she was a woman. There wasn’t even really a problem at all. It was just the fact that a woman was a knight. You had never seen anything like it in your entire life, and you had never even thought of the possibility of that happening. At all. You had to fight tooth and nail to keep property that you hardly even wanted, all because you were a woman. Because you weren’t pregnant with a son who could carry his hypothetical father’s name. Because you were a woman without the heir to your late husband’s fortunes, you were seen as nothing, for a long time. And now, there were women who were becoming knights?

You were more impressed than confused.

You felt another pinch from Pietro, this time a little harder. You breathed in through your nose, a welcoming smile on your face as you grappled for words.

“Hello,” you said, public voice still working hard as you internally scrambled for words. You were looking the red headed woman right in her eyes, the eyes that were so intense that if you hadn’t been in rooms where extreme business had gone down, you would have melted. You tried to remember the standard greeting. “Welcome to my keep. I hope that I can accommodate you during your stay, and that you are successful in your search for what it is that you are looking for.” You knew the words were off by a bit, but you saw the coachman nod in approval that you didn’t really care to have.

The knight took a step forward, and the sound of a heavy footstep crashing against your well-kept grass made you shiver. The trampled grass had nothing on the way that you reacted to hearing her voice. “It is a pleasure to meet you, Lady Mirellis. I sincerely thank you for allowing me into your home.”

It was hardly your home, and you could tell that the two of you had already gotten off on the wrong foot. You knew it was because of your shameless staring. “May I be graced with knowing your name?”

If possible, she stood up a little straighter. “I am Natasha Romanoff, My Lady.”

If you were hearing correctly, you heard the slight awkwardness in her last two words. Only people with titles of their own called other lords and ladies “my lady”, and lower born people were to call them “milady”. She must have been lowborn, just like you. “It is my deepest pleasure to meet you, Natasha. May I show you around my keep?”

“Typically,” the coachman cut in, and you furrowed your brows at the way he interrupted the stop-and-start flow of the conversation. “It isn’t the lord—sorry—lady of the house’s job to do that.”

Wanda opened her mouth, highly defensive of you and ready to go because it was a fight she could afford to pick. A servant and a coachman were on the same level. She would face no punishment for talking back to the man. However, you reached to your right and squeezed her hand twice.

“Well, I am the lady of the house, and I would like to show my new guest her accommodations.” The man narrowed his eyes slightly at you, and it became obvious to everyone that he clearly wasn’t expecting back talk from you.

You knew that everyone thought widows were these gentle, sad women. The type that cried themselves to sleep and wished to meet their husbands again in the afterlife. The type that listened at anything that a man uttered simply because he was a man, or because they didn’t have the energy to entertain an arguement or to correct them. Especially ladies. But you were not supposed to be a lady. You wore fancy dresses and had gold and had a small castle to yourself, but part of you would always be that girl who beat up the boys who lived a few acres away for talking about your hair and then rolled in mud with them, laughing about it the very next day.

Even through the glances that were thrown between the five of you standing there, you continued. “My staff has worked so hard on making sure it was nice for her. I’d like to show off their diligence now.” It wasn’t a question.

“Do as you please, milady.”

You resisted the urge to nod smugly. “Thank you.” You watched him climb back onto his chair and quirked a brow. The coachman always stayed for dinner. It was considered offensive if they did not, both to the knight and to the lord or lady. “Did you not want to stay for the meal, good sir?”

“I must get back, milady. If that is alright with you.”

You knew you should utter something lengthy that you didn’t mean at all, but the most you could get out after his blatant rudeness was a quick “safe travels.” There was a long stretch of awkward silence as you watched him leave, arms hanging at your sides as the trotting sound of horses carried him away.

“Goodness, was he rude.”

“Pietro.” Wanda hissed, and you bit the inside of your cheek to keep from laughing. You whirled around to look at the knight— Natasha— and saw that she was already looking at you with blatant curiosity.

“Would it be alright with you if I took you around myself?” You asked, and she nodded her head. “Well, I’m sure you’re hungry. Would you like to eat first?”

You were beginning to realize very quickly that the woman was the staring type. Her eyes, no, her entire face and persona was so demanding and intense. It was hard to even be provoked by her shameless staring and possible judgement, because at least she was open with it. The more you looked at her, though, the more you knew that you would never understand what was happening behind her eyes. “I would like to see.”

“Then you will see,” you stated, and gave Wanda a look. She knew immediately what it meant, and she walked off to tell the chefs to expect you in an hour or so. “We can start with the outside area and make our way in.”

She was very much the staring type. Not even just at faces or people in general, but with everything. You noticed that when anything caught her eye, she looked at it for a few seconds in silence and then moved on, like she heard them speak something unknown to everyone else and took the time to listen.

“These are the training grounds,” you said after walking to the back half of the castle, where the grass was still trained to grow with strength and hardly a thing was out of place. The training grounds were for young squires in the area or kids that just wanted to play fight. You had made the area yourself, and it was one of your favorite parts of your home. You liked being able to look outside and see children playing freely, and the sound of laughter was something that everyone needed in life. “You’re free to use them in any way you see fit, of course.”

“That’s very kind of you.”

“You’ll run into aspiring knights here and there, but they are good children.” Your voice was fond as you spoke of them, and then took a right. “And just down here, we have the gardens.”

And gardens, they were. They were the only thing in the castle that was actually yours while your husband was alive. When you had arrived, the patch of land was so disgraced that it would have been insulting to call it a garden. The flowers were droopy, the soil was dry, and the vibrant colors that were once there had been sucked away. Your husband didn’t care about the area, and neither did anyone else, so you adopted it. You had built it from the ground up and made it into what it was; a huge and gorgeous garden full of colors, with ivy hanging from rails in what looked like an unruly manner and bushes full of roses and begonias and everything in between. It was caged off by golden rails, but the rails were hardly binding. They were so wrapped with leaves that it looked like they grew with the garden.

“This is my favorite part of the keep,” you stated softly, walking down it. You had expanded it so that it went down and into the forest, the rails forming a path. You walked down it every so often yourself, deep into the woods where no one would bother you, where you could look at the stars above in peace.

“Is it yours?”

“What?” You asked, tearing your eyes from a particular bush to see her looking up at the ivy.

“This garden,” she said, and you realized that you were strolling closer and closer to the woods. You stopped walking, but didn’t make any move to go and meet her. “Do you tend to it?”

“It’s mine,” you answered, not even bothering to take the subtle pride out of your voice. “It’s my project. I started it when I got here, and now it’s flourishing.”

“Where did you learn how to garden?”

It was no secret that typically, ladies did not get their hands dirty, even if the activity was simple planting. They were supposed to stay inside and knit or something like that. Ladies could go outside to look at gardens, but they had staff to plant for them. So, did Natasha not know that you weren’t born with a title? “When I was a girl,” you answered vaguely.

“Your Lord Father allowed you?”

My father was no lord. “Yours allowed you to wield a sword?” The sound of armor clanking brought you out of your slight hostility, and you sighed. “I apologize.”

“It’s quite alright.” The harshness in her voice told you that she was offended by what you said, and she turned around once she realized that the two of you were nearing the tree line.

You walked around with Natasha, giving her the rest of the tour halfheartedly and only speaking when absolutely necessary. It was clear that the two of you clearly weren’t clicking as well as you hoped to, and while that was tragic, you weren’t going to kiss anyone’s feet to get in their good graces.

“I’m sure you’re hungry by now.” The second you stepped on the wood floors of the inside of your keep, the warmth hit you. Your shoes clicked on the material as you walked ahead of her, not looking back or waiting for an answer. “I’ll show you the kitchens, and then the dining hall.”

The dining hall was known for its size. It was huge, and the ceiling was high. Everything that was said echoed, and the lighting provided by strategically placed candles made the hall have an elegant, almost eerie feeling to it. The staff was already bustling around, plating food and pouring wine. Wanda and Pietro were already there, their harsh and bickering whispers hitting your ears until they heard you approaching.

“Oh, please, sit.” Wanda did so immediately, and Pietro walked around the table to pull out your chair, which sat at the head of it.

You cringed when Pietro sat down. He had been dethroned from his seat at your left hand, because it was courteous of you to give up that seat for your new night. That was one tradition that you wouldn’t break, simply because it would be seen as disrespectful. “You can sit right there, Lady Natasha.” You saw her lip twitch.

In all honesty, you had no idea what to call her formally. You two certainly weren’t close enough to address each other by first name, and you doubted she even knew it. But she wasn’t a man, and male knights were called “Sir”. She wasn’t a “Sir”. You didn’t want to offend her further by calling her it.

The first half of the dinner was in awkward silence. Wanda kept giving you glances, and you frowned at the way she was looking at you- like you had clearly messed something up. You sighed through your nose when you heard Pietro clear his throat, a sound that meant that he was about to run his mouth.

“So, my lady knight, what do you think of the castle?”

The red head didn't even realize she was being addressed until she looked up and saw you and everyone else looking at her expectantly. “It’s very nice.” You waited a bit, listening to hear whatever empty compliments that she would give for the sake of being polite. Ten seconds passed, and there was nothing.

You chuckled. “Thank you,” you answered just as shortly, holding back the urge to laugh much louder than was appropriate.

“So, where are you from?”

“The slums.” You nod in acknowledgment, and guilt. Sometimes you repressed the images of people living from coin to coin. But silly you, silly everyone. For there to have been people on the top, there had to be people at the bottom. And those who lived at the bottom lived in what were called “the slums”. “I don’t know if you would know anything about that, My Lady.”

Wanda made a noise that told you that the bold knight’s words were clearly meant to wound you, and Pietro’s brows shot upwards so quickly that you barely saw the movement happen. You stared at your plate, jaw dropped open in surprise and mortification.

You were fuming on the inside. How the hell would she know who you were? What you dealt with? How your husband was as cruel as he was disgusting? How you grew up a poor farmer’s daughter? She didn’t know, and that was what kept you grounded. How could she have known?

Before you could get in your right mind to utter a threat that you were sure that your late husband had said in your presence at least once, you nodded your head and took it in stride. You stood up from the table and didn’t look at her or the confused look she shot you after looking at your painfully unfinished plate.

“Wanda will show you to your chambers, Lady Natasha. I hope you enjoy your first dinner of many here at my castle, and I hope that tonight begins your yearlong journey to wisdom.” And with that, you turned on your heels after taking your plate shamelessly, heels clacking against the polished floor once again, silence filling the hall until long after you left.

§§

By the third day Natasha was there and the second that you had been blatantly avoiding her, you were starting to feel bad for fueling the fire between you two. She was to stay under your roof and do what she had to for a full year, and you antagonized her. You gave the sacred act of showing a knight to their room to someone else, and you understood Natasha’s lack of speech towards you to be a consequence of that.

But that was fine. You certainly didn’t need for the girl to like you. It would have made things much easier and smoother, but it wasn’t a necessity. Your job was to give her food, water, shelter, and time to find herself and her purpose as a knight. Nothing said that the two of you had to be as thick as thieves.

But that also didn’t mean that you would actively pass on befriending her. You decided after a long time of sitting at the polished wooden desk that had become yours that you would be her friend should fate allow it, and if not, there was no harm to it. But you weren’t going to chase her, no matter how wonderfully her bright hair would work as an object to follow.

A soft calling of your name happened seconds before Wanda opened the door. You greeted her informally and grinned at her, until you saw the look on her face and the sealed paper in her hand. Immediately, your joyful expression left and you sighed.

“Who is it this time?” Wanda shut the door behind her after your question, and you gave her a look. “It can’t be Lord Rumlow again.”

Brock Rumlow was not a good man. No man who had power was a good man, but he was one of the worst. He had gone through two wives in the past three years, and the second one was found with stab wounds in the forest. How he had gotten out of being tried for her murder was beyond you, and it made you sick to your stomach every time you thought about it. Now, he set his sights on you, a widow sitting on plenty of money and land. He had been sending you letters, flowers, gold, dresses, anything that a narcissistic man would think that another human being would like simply because the things were tangible. And the letters always said the same old thing; to marry him. And he wasn’t ever really asking.

“It’s him,” Wanda confirmed, her tone telling you that she felt the same way you did towards the vile man.

“I want to burn it,” you said, and immediately, Wanda crossed the room to put the note in the fire, waiting for your final say. “Let me read what this imbecile has asked for now. I wonder what beautiful horse or jewel he’ll offer for my hand, this time.”

You took the letter from Wanda gently and gave her a small smile, and she urged you to open it, just as nervous to see what was inside as you were. You stared at his seal for a few seconds, eyeing the red wax with a three headed serpent engraved with disdain before tearing it right open. You did the rest without ceremony, your eyes narrowed as you found the messy and unbothered handwriting that you would recognize from anywhere.

Lady of Riverstone,

I take it that my other letters may have been lost to the wind. I apologize for not reaching you earlier. But, if you have been getting my letters, then my main offer stands the same. I would be honored for you to take my name and stand under my veil, and for you to become my wife. Marriage to me would give you a great deal of benefits, and I have listed them down below. I would like an answer within two fortnights, and if I don’t get one, I’ll send another letter.

It was all more of the same, more of the same offers and then a little more, vague threats, and monotonous language that he hardly knew how to use correctly. You read with a neutral expression, even though Wanda was shocked reading all of the things he was offering. He signed it off like he did every other letter.

Lord Rumlow, of Serpent’s Keep.

“He offered you two tons of gold to send your father?”

“Do you notice how he’s never called me Lady Mirellis?” You asked, sipping the chalice of water that constantly sat at your desk, and got refilled whenever someone walked by and saw it nearing empty. “Or by my name?”

“I have.”

“It’s always ‘Lady of Riverstone’,” you sighed, shaking your head. “If he wants the land, he should just go on and say that. It’s much more respectable for him to be honest with me. Maybe I would have said yes already.”

Wanda made a face. “You’re lying, now.”

“Well, of course I am. I've never seen him, and all he wants is a woman to beat around. I’m not that woman, no woman is. Do you think I want to find myself dead within a half year of being wed?” There was a sharp knock on your door.

“He wouldn’t kill you. He wouldn’t gain these assets after your death,” Wanda said softly, understanding that you were about to finish the conversation. “He must be truly desperate to pay ou two tons of gold. That could help nearly anyone out of a pickle, and it would certainly pay off some things back at the farm.”

You knew that. But the truth was… you held a certain amount of irrational and rational disdain for your family. You knew that some of it was warranted just off of the way humans worked in general, but others weren’t. You knew for a fact that a part of you would always be bitter about the way that no one fought hard enough for you not to be taken from your home. You knew that a part of you would be bitter because they took the money that your late husband had offered them, like you were the fattest, most desirable pig in the pen. And there would forever, and ever, be a part of you—if not all of you— that would be angry about your wedding night.

Half of your family showed. The other half came, took you to a back room, and cried. They cried on your night of terror, and you comforted them. It was the one time where you truly needed your mother and her maternal instincts, the one time you needed your brother to teach you some moves that could hurt a man if you needed them. And they either weren’t where you needed them, or weren’t what you needed them. Both truths hurt the same.

“My family doesn’t need money,” you settled on saying, swallowing the burning that came with thinking about the people you shared blood with. “If they needed it, they would ask.”

“Your father is a proud man, he wouldn’t set that pride aside. Especially not to ask one of his own daughters for money.”

“Well, let that be their problem,” you said, although your harsh words weren’t as impactful because of the tremor in them. “I won’t marry Lord Rumlow.”

Wanda leaned forward a bit, and she took both of your hands in hers as the knocking grew louder. She looked you in the eyes, just the way one true friend looked at another. With the same ferocity in her voice as the time when she assured you that no one was going to force you to give up your rights to ladyship, her next words were no louder than a whisper. “And no one will make you.”

Your eyes almost grew watery as you held her hands, feeling the purity of the bond you shared with her surging. “Thank you.” You looked towards the door and let her hands go, uttering a soft command.

Pietro stood there with his arms crossed and a flushed look on his face. He cocked his head to the side at the sight of you and Wanda hovering over a broken open letter, and took a few steps forward. It was upside down, so you turned it his way so that he could read it easier, and the second he recognized the handwriting, he groaned.

“I think I can assume what this is,” he rolled his eyes, and he picked it up and walked over to the fire. When you’d said nothing, he tossed it in and the three of you watched it burn. “I came to tell you that our little knight is strange.”

“How so?”

“Well, she's writing.”

You furrowed your brows. “Writing?” You repeated, remembering her saying that she grew up poor. Most commoners had no idea how to read or write. You only learned because you had to learn when you married a lord. And even if knights had the ability to read and write, they hardly did. Words had very little value to a man who could wield a sword.

But Natasha Romanoff was no man.

“What on earth would she be writing about?” Wanda asked, leaning against the desk. “I wonder if she’s required to write a review on her treatment.”

Pietro gave a short but genuine laugh. “She’s probably writing down terrible things about you to give to the king after she returns home,” he joked, and Wanda cracked a smile, but you couldn’t find it in you to laugh.

“I couldn’t care less about a review of my hospitality or lack therefore of,” you drawled.

Wanda rolled her eyes. “Yes, you do, because you’re a kind person.”

“But she is not.” You felt bad for saying the words that you said not even seconds after.

“We don’t know that,” Wanda reasoned softly. “Actually, I happen to know that she’s quite nice. And she’s level headed and very smart, from what I can see. She’s no man with a little praise under his belt, that’s for sure.”

“So, she’s not boastful.” You said. “That’s good. But I don’t see her and I sharing more interactions than what we need to.”

“With all due respect, Lady Y/N,” Pietro said, leaning forward with that characteristic smirk of his plastered over his face. “You are very dramatic. You always have been.”

You could hardly even pretend to be offended. “That’s not true.”

“It is,” Wanda said quietly, though not fearfully at all. “You are always dramatic, and then things work out.”

Wanda was right. She very much was, actually. Things like the river nearly drying up and crops rotting too quickly and other things that were completely out of your hands terrified you. The things that you couldn’t control made you irrational and erratic, and that was probably your worst fault. You did the same with things you could change, only with worrying. Something as simple as an apology could fix something, but you would sit on giving the apology for hours, sometimes even days.

That night, when it seemed like everyone else was fast asleep and dreaming sweet little images, you put on slippers and walked right outsides, your guards not even asking you where you were going. You walked right out of the side doors and into the garden, humming quietly to yourself as you walked through the entrance of it with your pails of water.

It was quiet besides the noise of bugs chirping, and the occasional flap of wings from birds above. Even your humming had tapered off, and it felt like you could have been able to hear things from miles away. You smiled in the crisp air as you bent over to water a rose bush, a soft affirmation towards the red flowers when you saw how pretty they looked in the moonlight. When you stood back up and turned your head around, you gasped in fright and tumbled towards the ground.

“Shit,” a hand caught your arm and the other was on your shoulder as your chest heaved, adrenaline rushing from being so frightened. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. I thought you saw me.” It took you a second to see the face of the woman speaking in the moonlight, but when you saw it was the knight, you sighed.

You were set back on two feet, and then Natasha took a step backwards. “Why are you out here?”

She shrugged. “It’s pretty.” There was a stretch of silence as you waited for her to say something, anything else. “It’s safe.”

A part of you was angered by that statement. Yes, the gardens were safe. Of course they were, they were your safety! They were your place that you went to when you felt like nothing was in your control, like your own decisions weren’t yours. Nothing could hurt you in the gardens, and plants couldn’t talk. They held every secret that you could ever tell, they held every tear that you never shed in front of another, and they saw every emotion that you were too stoic to show in front of others. They were the one place that you could get peace. And now the knight has ruined it.

But on the other hand, you were proud of yourself for creating something that someone else can admire. You created something that someone else could be free in, and in a way, that was amazing. And that hand was outweighing the other.

So, you said, “I’m glad it feels that way.” You cleared your throat softly when you realized that you were speaking to her the way you spoke to the twins. “I created it as my own safe space, so I’m glad someone else thinks of it that way, too.”

There was a short yet heavy silence between you and Natasha, and then you saw her turn to face you, her eyes burning a hole into the side of your face. “I know you’re not very excited to have me here, but I’m here. So we can at least try to be cordial.”

“Is that not what we’re being?” You asked, not even taking your eyes off of the moon. “I thought we were even being a little friendly.”

“It would be nice if it lasted.” Natasha muttered, and you nodded your head.

“I don’t know if I offended you with the question about whether or not your father approved your knighthood,” you said, sighing. “I assume that I did. And if you carry around that offense, then I apologize. I don’t like talking about my own father, but you couldn’t have known that.”

“You do not need to be forgiven,” she states. “I apologize, as well.”

“And it’s not that I don’t want you here,” you started, already cursing yourself for going into what she had said not even a full minute earlier. You were tense as she waited for you to continue, but you just shrugged and sighed. “Just know that that’s not it.” Something reached toward you out of the corner of your eye, and you finally turned your head to look at her.

She was… she was nothing short of gorgeous. You were taller than her, so you looked down at her just a little bit. Her red hair looked more brown than anything, and her blue eyes were pale and still as beautiful as they were during the day. There was the smallest hint of a smile on her face, nervous almost, as you looked down at the arm that was reached out your way. The moon was shedding you both its white light, and it primarily rested right where her arm was extended, her palm lord and turned to the side.

She wanted to shake hands with you. Shaking hands was seen as archaic, and knights certainly didn’t touch ladies unless they were assisting them. But, you knew by now that Natasha was not the typical knight. One of her fingers twitched, and you realized that she was just waiting there, her hand hanging in the air, like a gavel ready to drop at any moment. And quickly, almost enough to make the other woman startle, you took her right hand in your own and shook it twice, keeping your eyes right on hers.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

******

hiiii guys! still establishing things here with this chapter, but when things kick off, they are going full speed. i already love this fic, and i can’t wait to put all my ideas down for it as the finished product! i hope you guys liked it, and if you did, please show her some love! i have a little taglist building up, so here it goes!

@normanijauregui @fayhar @8plasma @procrastinatingsapphictrash

@slut-for-nat @dontmindmejustreading @swords-are-cool

@200605chaeng @thescottishavenger @antidaytime @jenny-song @madamevirgo @natasha-danvers @drdarcy-lewis @blackxwidowsxwife

#natasha romanoff fluff #natasha x female reader #natasha romanoff series #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff angst #marvel fanfic #knight!natasha #lgbtq #gay!natasha #marvel au #natasha romanov x reader #natasha x fem reader

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souyaf · 2 years

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hi i just wanted to ask how women reading yaoi/yuri is automatically fetishism? im sorry for asking its just i could not understand that. a lot of trans individuals discovered their proper gender/sexual identity through such media, im non-binary and bi and media exposure is what made me understand myself in a homophobic/transphobic environment...and cishet people can read or produce it as well. is consuming or creating mlm/wlw content exclusive to the individuals only? i will absolutely not say that a lot of people are not creepy, they are weird about fictional stuff and that leads them to be weird to real people too. again my apologies, i just wanted to understand as english is not my native language so i just wish to be respectful. sorry for the long ask

hi! my dni specifically states "if you're a cishet woman and read yaoi/are a fujoshi/fetishize mlm/wlw."

so i would like to preface and say there's a difference between yaoi/BL and yuri/GL. since my dni specifically mentions yaoi i'll go there.

so first it depends what your intentions are when consuming the media. if you're reading BL why are you reading it? do you just like that it's two guys and you find that hot/cute? or do you actually enjoy the storyline and characters and how their relationship forms and grows.

if you're reading it because you just like to see two guys romancing each other because they're guys...then that's weird. but if you're reading it because the storyline and character growth is really enjoyable then that's okay!

as for yaoi....i don't think there's really any reason a cishet women should be looking at straight up yaoi for any reason other than that she's getting off to it. yaoi in this instance is porn. it's just straight up porn. even worse if they identify as a fujoshi and read yaoi.

fetishizing mlm/wlw just means that when you're, say, scrolling down tiktok and see two dudes just being pals you immediately go to ship them. because they're guys. and they're friends!!!!! so they have to be dating bc gay people can't be friends with someone of the same sex without being gay together!! that's 1. kinda homophobic and 2. fucking weird.

this is a huge reason i strongly dislike shipping culture in general. most of the time it just feels like people see two characters of the same sex and go "🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 they have to date now!!!!!" even tho there's no real substance to their personalities and sometimes they never even interact. it gives a very weird message of "MEN MUST BE TOGETHER SO THEY CAN BE GAY ABD DO GAY THINGS" if you yourself are a gay person and ship ppl to be gay that's fine but if you're straight and immediately go to make everyone gay....again....ask yourself why you do that...is it because "ugh gay relationships are SOOOOOO much cuter than straight ones!!!!"

so essentially, it really comes down to your own intentions. naturally, i don't know your intentions when you're reading content or doing whatever but you do. and i like to make it clear thru my DNI how i feel about it. if you know you're reading the content for a good reason then fine but if you find yourself reading the content for less than ideal reasons then...u know, smthn to think about i suppose.

also to tack on; i don't like when cishet people create wlw/mlm/nblw/nblm content or whatever mostly because it's going to be told thru a cishet view. it's not really their content to be creating or their stories to be told. they don't know what it's like to be gay in a gay relationship all theyre going to have is their third party views and that just....again, begs the question of why is a cishet person wanting to insert themselves into non-cishet content

#[+] — love note #[+] — love anon #i hope this makes sense my hands r fuckinf freezing #and it's hard to type

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minor-solemnity · 3 years

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What's your favorite character from the golden trio era?

Oooh idk possibly this is an unpopular opinion - at least it was when I was like, properly in the fandom rather than where I am now which is firmly on the sidelines with my hands over my ears and ignoring everything that I don't like - but Cho Chang. This is probably in part because she got so much undeserved hatred (thank u fandom and author racism) and I am predisposed to like characters that people don't like.

I find her character so heartbreakingly real in a way that I think is entirely accidental on JKR's part. I don't think JK can write women. (Plz don't hate me for that, but like, it's true.) Everything interesting about the characters we are meant to like gets sanded down and ignored in the later books - Hermione's whole thing is like, book smart but not emotionally intelligent, she wants to be right and have people know she's right more than she cares about their feelings. She thinks rules are important until they apply to her. She is ruthless and vindictive and petty. These are interesting character traits that just get completely dropped in the later books. By the time book 6 ends and book 7 starts Hermione is 'wife' and 'mother' and it's kinda sad.

I digress.

Cho's boyfriend is murdered. Cho is understandably upset and heartbroken and sad af. She tries to find comfort in Harry because Harry was there, Harry must understand. Harry can help her process. Their ways of dealing with trauma are completely opposite to each other. Cho seeks emotional vulnerability and closeness from the boy who, of all people, will understand. Harry's way of processing trauma is to ignore it. It happened, it sucks, I will never speak of it again (until all my unprocessed emotions come spilling out and I end up lashing out and getting angry). Those two ways of dealing with trauma are not going to work well together. Harry is honestly a dick towards her - she's his fantasy. She's not a real person to him. When that fantasy comes crashing down he behaves pretty awfully towards her. And if you're reading critically, you come away thinking yeah, Cho's a whiny crybaby who doesn't get Harry at all. What a bitch. When in reality, it's more like - Cho is seriously fucked up and is trying to come to terms with her grief and seek comfort in someone who she thought would get it.

Imagine being like, 16 and being isolated and sad and so fundamentally misunderstood. Imagine being 18 and your friends are dead and the boy you liked is still dead and the other boy you thought you might like is a hero and the only thing you're really known for is the mess that is your grief. Imagine that the popular consensus is that your grief is something to be ridiculed.

I tend to pick and chose which parts of the extended canon I believe in, but I believe in Cho moving to America and getting hitched to an American muggle dude. (Moving to America is probably my own headcanon actually). What would motivate her to move across the world? Grief? Wonderlust? Anger? I imagine it's all three. Idk if this is a relatable feeling to a lot of people, but I get it. I have a constant itch under my skin that tells me to move on whenever a place starts to feel too much like home. To leave. To escape. Nowhere feels like home because home is a collection of broken things. It's a hall of funhouse mirrors - the wires in your brain get mixed up. Comfort and safety become synonymous with 'i will fuck this up' and 'i don't deserve this' and 'everyone will leave'.

I want so many things for Cho. I want her name to make sense. I want her to be seen as something other than 'pretty' and 'sad'. I want her in Boston slamming Sam Adams by Sam Adams grave because she finds it funny. I want her in Boston, learning to drive a car (stick-shift because the driving instructor had made a comment about how automatics are easier to learn and she is tired of people seeing her as something weak and unable). I want her road-raging and I want her to drive across the country because why the fuck not. I want her in New York and the city is so frantic and no one looks at her and she feels so small and the lights are so bright and she thinks maybe she could disappear here and no one would ever know. I want her to find a group of women rollerskating and maybe they invite her to their roller derby group. It isn't flying, but it's fast and aggressive and she's never allowed herself to be aggressive like this before. She's not allowed herself to be angry like this before. No one else has allowed her to be angry like this before.

I want her to go to California and to go to Angel Island and I want her to understand that there have been people like her before. That she is not alone in this feeling. I want her to meet a dude who's studying for an MBA - he doesn't know who she is. Doesn't know what she is. She's just this cute girl who drinks Sam Adams even tho that's a Boston thing and they're in San Diego. He's probably a frat boy. I want him to be a frat boy who takes his degree too seriously and wakes up at like 5 because he's also a gym rat. He takes her to his boxing class. She probably cries during and hey that's okay - she has a lot of shit to work through, he can tell. He doesn't ask about it. Just says her accent is cute. Maybe she starts taking night classes, maybe she doesn't. She's weirdly technologically illiterate - she sends him postcards even though they live in the same city. She says its because her school didn't let them have phones. She's never seen a Tarintino film and that's just like... not cool. They watch True Romance on his shitty box TV in his room in his frat house and she laughs (she laughs like the violence is cathartic) when Alabama completely destroys Virgil. He looks at her and she shrugs and says 'I get it.'

She says that's she's leaving soon - doesn't know where. Probably isn't coming back and again that's... not cool. She's weird about some stuff. Won't talk about home - won't say where she's from. He should be fine with it because like, it's not as if this is anything serious and his life is pretty clearly planned out. Get an MBA, work in some start-up tech company - the internet is a thing now and god, there's money to be made. He thinks maybe that she should like, stay but she also seems like the kind of person who doesn't know how to stop running. And look, he's doing an MBA. He rushed his frat. He goes to boxing every morning without fail. He's determined. He's not good at letting the things he wants go. But he lets her go because she doesn't want to stay. One night afterwards, his frat bro says, philosophical because they're crossfaded, that maybe she can't stay. Maybe she won't let herself stay. And that... That sounds about right.

So he waits. He waits and he gets postcards with no return address - in Seattle, she tries ice hockey. In Miami, she tries surfing. He almost gets on a plane to Cincinnati because she got into a fight with some dude who made his girlfriend cry in public. Apparently, she knocked him out with a punch just the way he showed her to. It feels weirdly romantic.

I want her to write a postcard to him when she's sitting in a bar in Las Vegas and I want her to include a return address. I want him on the first flight out, because fuck his classes? She included a return address. He asks her if she's ever going to go home and she looks at him and says, 'What? To San Diego?'

#cho chang #meta #oh god i wrote meta #this isn't even meta tbh - this is basically a fic #this very much got away from me #can u tell i have feelings about women being angry?#grief and anger taste the same #harry potter #asks #anon #she speaks

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wienerbarnes · 3 years

Text

Much Ado About Nothing (1/6)

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Word Count: 2,726

Warnings: enemies to lovers, talk of wedding and marriage stuff

A/N: enjoy the first part and let me know what u think!

MAIN MASTERLIST | MUCH ADO MASTERLIST

The ride back to New York feels a lot longer than the ride to Croatia, Bucky decides. HYDRA wasn’t kidding around when they said cut one head off and two take its place, whatever. No matter how hard Earth’s Mightiest Heroes try, there’s another facility that pops up at one point or another.

Bucky tries to think positively; they should be off HYDRA duty, if they keep up the consistent schedule of finding a new facility every three or so months, for a bit now.

“What’s the first thing you guys are gonna do when you get back? I’m gonna get some hot chocolate from the little cafeteria in the main building.” Sam hums from the seat directly behind Bucky.

Bucky’s in the passenger while Steve pilots and he gives his own answer at the same time as Steve,

“Shower.”

“Propose to Sharon.”

A small pause for the boys to ensure they heard that correctly.

“Wanna run that by us again, Cap?” Sam pipes up.

“When we land, I’m going to propose to Sharon.” Steve repeats nonchalantly.

“Since when?!” Bucky asks. He knows for a fact that Steve and Sharon adore each other, but Steve has never brought up marriage once in the time he’s dated Sharon, and clearly he hasn’t done so to Sam, either.

“Listen, I know we haven’t been dating long, but I know I love her and I know she loves me, so, what’s the point in waiting?” He explains.

“Is this about what happened earlier, Steve?” Bucky asks, knowing his best friend all too well.

A bomb was in the facility, of course, and Steve and Bucky tried to disarm it while Sam rallied the rest of prisoners out of the building.

Now, while Steve has obtained most of his training through his serum-fueled muscle memory and military experience over the last few decades, he is extremely lucky. Steve has successfully disarmed twenty-nine bombs throughout his Avengers career. Not a single failure. With no bomb training.

So when he cut one of the wires confidently and the timer started ticking faster, it made him nervous. And it made him even more nervous when he clipped a different wire and the time counter automatically set to zero. He froze in shock and was lucky Bucky was able to fling the two of them out a window and away from the direct blast.

“Okay, so, yeah, maybe I got a little scared. But, listen, it’s not a lie that we lead dangerous lives. Why should I hold back on the things I want if I know tomorrow isn’t promised?” Steve defends.

“Steve, you can’t marry a girl because you’re scared of dying!” Bucky exclaims.

“I’m not marrying her for that, Bucky, I love her!”

“I know you love her, but -”

“But?! -”

“Alright, alright, listen,” Sam interrupts their sibling bickering, “If this is what you want, I’m with you 100%, Cap.” Sam reassures.

Steve gives a thankful smile and looks back to Bucky, hoping for the same.

“You know I’m always on board with you, you punk.” Bucky slaps a hand on his shoulder.

“Thanks, guys.”

“Ah, big man’s gonna be engaged!” Sam throws his hands on Steve’s shoulders, jostling his body in the tiny pilot’s seat, and Bucky joins in on the teasing.

“I’m gonna tell everyone to meet in the hangar for when you ask her.” Sam says, pulling out his phone.

“You’re not gonna tell the Geek, are you?” Bucky groans.

“Of course, I’m gonna tell her. I don’t know why you don’t like her, man.”

Bucky rolls his eyes at the thought of the little lab rat. Sharon’s best friend. A young girl, born and raised in New York though thoroughly traveled through your work experience. Been to over fifty countries offering your expertise to combat cyberterrorism and have helped locate some of the hardest-to-find and worst people in the world.

You act like you’re all that just because you’re considered one of the youngest geniuses in the country and one of the greatest hackers in the world as well as the Avengers’ best tech expert of all time.

Whatever, big whoop, Bucky could care less.

As the jet lands, hugs and cheers are exchanged as the group of friends reacquaint themselves once again after a long mission. After greeting everyone, Bucky hangs on the outskirts of the group, waiting to see how Steve is going to pop his big question.

“C’mon, punk, don’t lose your courage.” Bucky talks to himself.

“I don’t know if you noticed, Bucky, but no one’s listening to you. You can stop talking.” Your voice pipes up next to him.

“Oh, hey, Little Miss Geeky, don’t you have some codes to hack, or something?” He bites at you.

“I told you not to call me that!”

“I told you not to call me that,” Bucky mocks you in a higher pitched voice.

“Geez, how does anyone stand you around here? I don’t get how all the female trainees are infatuated with you.”

“They definitely kiss my ass because I train them and I have the final say on whether or not they move on to second-class training, but even if I didn’t,” Bucky turns to face you now, “They’d still love me because every woman here loves me except for you, it seems.”

“Doesn’t matter anyway, I’m not interested in getting involved with anyone or anything right now, I don’t even know I’m capable of that, anymore.” Bucky finishes.

“Women everywhere are lucky, then. You’d make a horrible boyfriend. I’m glad I have no need for romance, either.”

“Hopefully you keep it that way, any guy that ends up with your catty ass will end up with his face scratched up.”

“Well, if his face looks anything like yours, a good scratching would only make it look better.”

“Alright, alright, enough, you two. Can’t even be civil around each other for five minutes.” Sam interrupts, slinging each of his arms around both you and Bucky’s shoulders, shoving himself in between the two of you.

“She started it.”

“No, he -”

“Stop! He’s about to do it.” Sam shushes you.

“He’s about to do what -”

“Guys, guys, I want everyone’s attention.” Steve’s voice calls out, and everyone quiets down immediately.

Steve turns to Sharon, “Sharon, you are the most beautiful, the strongest, the kindest, and most amazing woman I’ve ever laid my eyes on.” He begins.

“I’ve known for a while now, and I know you have, too, that I love you with every fiber of my being. You make me a better Captain, and a better man every day I’m with you. I truly and deeply believe that you’re my soulmate and I won’t ever find another girl like you in my life. You’re all I’ve ever wanted. So, I don’t want to waste anymore time,” Steve lowers down onto one knee and a few gasps echo from the group.

Bucky sees you slap a hand over your mouth in shock and Sam sniffles beside him. A small smile appears on Bucky’s face, too.

“Sharon, will you make me the happiest man alive, and marry me?”

“Yes, yes, yes! Steve, yes I’ll marry you!” Sharon cries out, jumping into Steve’s arms as he stands again, and the group claps and cheers for them.

They share sweet kiss after sweet kiss, relishing in the new step in their relationship.

Sharon’s voice catches everyone in their celebration, though, “Let’s get married now!”

Collective what’s come from the group of friends that surround them, “Like you said, babe, let’s not waste anymore time!”

“Sharon, if you think you’re not getting the most gorgeous and lovely wedding you deserve, you’re mistaken.” You tell her.

“For once, I agree with Techie, Shar. I mean you don’t have a dress, Steve doesn’t have a tux; hell, the two of you don’t even have rings!” Bucky says.

“I can make it happen in a week.” Tony’s voice booms from the group. Everyone looks to him.

“I can get you guys rings, I can get Sharon a dress, and Steve a suit, I can set up the smaller ballroom for a pre-wedding party for everyone tonight and get the bigger ballroom ready for a wedding by next Friday.” Tony offers.

“Consider it a wedding gift.” He smiles.

Sharon and Steve look to each other before looking back at Tony, “Next Friday it is, then.”

The group goes back to congratulating the newly engaged couple as well as conversing about the future wedding.

...

“Hey, did you guys hear about the rumored wedding?”

Bruce Banner pipes up in the empty lab after returning from downstairs. Well, not empty, of course, but empty of you, the intern’s tech leader in their internship.

“What idiot would want to get married, nowadays?” John pipes up.

The only reason he’s here is because his step-brother, Sam “The Falcon” Wilson insisted on getting him this internship gig. Everyone was always saying how he wasn’t going to live up to his big brother’s legacy, and he hated the fact that that was only ingrained into his existence further by the fact that Sam got him this position.

“Your brother’s best buddy.” Clint Barton enters and answers. Always roaming around the building, he is.

“What, that pretty boy, Steve?��

“That’s the one.” The archer confirms and plops himself down in a spinning chair.

“Huh. And I guess he’s marrying that pretty girlfriend of his? When did this happen?”

“That he is. It happened just downstairs now that they’ve returned from that mission. There’s a party tonight to celebrate.” Banner informs him, hoping the sound of a party will liven the kid’s spirits a bit.

Banner can see the kid’s frustration in living in his brother’s shadow - or feeling like so - and hopes that allowing him the opportunity to make some good memories will make his time here feel a little less miserable. Despite the connection to his brother, John’s incredibly smart for a nineteen-year-old, a teenager, and deserves to have a little play among all his work.

“Hmmm. I think I’ll go. Who doesn't love a good party, right?” John says, satisfying both Avengers in the lab with him.

Meanwhile, John’s fantasizing, he’s going to get into trouble around here.

…

Sharon, Tony, and you sit around a small table in the cafeteria while Sam waits for his hot chocolate across the room.

“If only I could find a guy in between Steve and Bucky. Steve’s too vanilla and Bucky’s too… Bucky.” You say.

“Keep thinking like that and you won’t find anyone.” Tony tells you.

“Well, good. I pray everyday that God doesn’t send me a husband. Ugh, and especially not a guy like Steve or Bucky; I can’t stand those beards.”

“Maybe you’ll find a husband that shaves.” Sharon offers.

“I know I’m not hearing my darling Geeky and husband as topics in the same conversation.” Sam finally joins with his cup of hot chocolate.

“You’re right, you’re not. I’ll start looking for a husband when they make men out of something other than trash. Speaking of which, I know Steve is America’s Golden Boy, or whatever, but you make sure he treats you right.” You say.

“I second that.” Sam agrees.

“I third it.” Tony follows.

Sharon laughs, “Guys, guys, I appreciate it, but I don’t need you guys to have that talk with me, Steve is amazing, and you all know it.”

“Yeah, yeah, anyway, I’m going to go shower for the party tonight, I’ve been holed up in the lab all morning.” You stand and go to exit the cafeteria.

Bucky’s way ahead of you in that aspect, following through with what he said on the jet and retreating up to his room to shower as soon as the congratulations were given to the happy couple.

Showering is a special ritual Bucky follows after a rough mission. Of course, everyone showers after a mission, but Bucky makes his post-mission showers extra special.

He double shampoos both his hair and his beard, lathering them up with a smooth conditioner after, while he washes all the dirt and gunk from his body with a lavender and grapeseed oil body soap.

He applies a face mask while he cleans up any wounds he might’ve sustained on the mission, as well as polishing and scrubbing his metal arm clean. Once he’s finished, he painfully reminds himself that he can’t just sleep for the next sixteen hours. He has to get ready to go to a party.

He sighs to himself, “Let’s get this over with.”

…

Everyone in the ballroom is dressed to the nines for the last-minute engagement party. There’s music, dancing, drinks, and just about everyone that works in the tower is in that room.

The group of friends all find each other eventually, and of course all of the attention is on the future bride and groom. Talk of colors and themes and cakes all overwhelm the couple - the question of whether or not Sharon will wear a garter makes Steve blush.

Quite honestly, they’re on the verge of just eloping downtown and saying to hell with all the parties and festivities.

“Okay, okay, can we talk about something else? I don’t want all this wedding stuff to be the only thing I hear about for the next seven days.” Sharon finally interrupts.

“Okay, what do you want to talk about, Miss Bride-to-be?” You ask.

“Well, how about when you’re going to find yourself a husband?” Sharon teases her friend, knowing how much she despises talking about her own love life, or lack thereof.

“Oh no, absolutely not, not this again. I’m going to get a drink.” You wave her off, stepping away from the group and making your way back towards the open bar.

“I hope I didn’t arrive just as we were talking about relationship stuff.” Bucky says as he arrives and finally finds his friends.

“I’m afraid you did.” Natasha confirms beside Sharon.

“In that case, I’m gonna follow Geeky’s lead and get a drink; I’ll certainly need one for that conversation.” Bucky excuses himself, the shadow of his dark blue suit follows the flow of your navy gown worn tonight; you surely matched by complete accident.

“Imagine if they were married.” Sharon thinks aloud to Natasha.

“Who? Barnes and Geek-a-Chic? Please, they’d kill each other within a week of being married.” Natasha argues.

“I hope y'all aren’t talking about our Barnes and Techie, because there’s no way in hell they’d be caught dead with each other like that.” Sam butts in, Steve by his side.

“C’mon guys, think about it. It’s like opposites attract and all that. Plus, I think they are the only people that are a match for their own wits.” Sharon explains.

“I don’t know, babe. They’re constantly at each other’s necks; I don’t even think they’ve had a normal conversation with each other without insults or bickering.” Steve says.

“I suggest we do the impossible.” Tony interrupts, clearly having had a few too many drinks.

“While we wait for the wedding to come, we are going to set those two up together.” He hiccups.

“Tony, you’re crazy.”

“That’ll never work.”

“I’m with it!” Sam shouts, excited to play along and work with Tony on his shenanigans.

“Atta boy, Sammy! C’mon, Sharon? Nat? Steve? Where’s Clint, I know he’ll be on board with this.” Tony whips his head around in all directions looking for the archer.

“C’mon, guys, it’ll be fun! The worst that can happen is that we fail.” Sam tries to convince.

“I think the worst that can happen is that we succeed! Imagine Barnes and her together!” Natasha exclaims.

“I just want her to be happy. She deserves a good boyfriend and husband.” Sharon says sweetly, Sam words slowly convincing her.

“I agree.” Steve chimes in, wanting the best for his own best friend as well.

The five of them turn towards the bar to see Bucky and their favorite tech nerd pushing and shoving at each other’s shoulders, clearly fighting about something once again.

“Alright, I’m on board. Let’s do it.” Natasha finally agrees.

John watches the happy friend group from a distance. He sees his brother smiling and laughing with his friends; his famous, talented, skilled friends, his friends who are soon going to be married and live happily ever after.

Not if he can help it, anyway.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes series #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes fanfiction

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intheticklecloset · 3 years

Text

The Blushing Game (My Hero Academia) / 12 Days of Ficmas

One Shot

Day 9/12

Requested by: Gummi Anon

Fandom: My Hero Academia

Shipping: KamiMomoJirou (poly ship)

This is my first time ever writing for a poly ship, so I hope I manged to pull it off here. This was a super fun one to write! I’m so obsessed with MHA right now that writing for the fandom gives me liiiiiife! I was so happy to see this request in my inbox! Gummi requested a fic in which Kaminari is still processing the fact that he has two girlfriends, so Momo and Jirou find it hilarious to tease him and make him blush. Enjoy!

Note: This fic will remain unconnected to my other MHA fics. It’s just for the 12 Days! ^^

Once upon a time, Denki Kaminari desperately hoped he’d be lucky enough to score a girlfriend one day.

Now, he had two.

How on Earth he’d been so lucky, he still had no idea. Two young women who liked him – and each other – enough to form a polyamorous relationship together was a dream come true for him. One that he honestly still thought he might wake up from any day now. But it was real, and every day Momo and Jirou found ways to remind him of that.

Today, evidently, was “see how hard we can make Denki blush” day for the girls. The three of them were in Jirou’s room hanging out together, talking about classes, discussing future hero work – all the usual stuff. Then, suddenly, it was as if the two females in the room had some sort of unspoken discussion between themselves, because the next thing Kaminari knew…

“Want to play a game, sweetheart?” Momo asked, smiling at him.

Kami grinned. “Yeah, sure. What is it?”

She glanced at Jirou, then back at him. “We want to see how flustered we can make you.”

“Basically, if we can make you go stupid just from teasing you.” Jirou smirked. “I don’t think it will take much.”

He paused, eyes widening as he glanced back and forth between them. “Uh…I mean…if you think it will be fun, then sure, I…I guess…” He floundered for words, unsure what to say. How could he refuse their hopeful faces?

“Great. I’ll start,” Momo announced, scooting closer to him and reaching an arm around his shoulders while her free hand began working at the tie he still wore from class today. “Hey, handsome.”

“Oh, god,” he whimpered, not realizing he’d said it out loud until both of them chuckled at him. He shifted a little but stayed put as Momo worked his tie loose and eventually slid it off of him.

She smiled at him. “You’re looking particularly good today. Did you do something different with your hair?”

“U-Um…” Denki tried not to blush, but he knew it was useless. He was blushing as soon as she’d said the word ‘flustered.’ It was like an automatic response in his biology. “Nope, just, ah…just feeling good, you know?”

Jirou scooted forward now as well, running one hand through his hair. “Feeling good, huh?” She kissed his cheek briefly. “I’d say so.”

Kami whined a little, feeling the heat of his blush and wishing he wasn’t so easy to tease. Before he could say anything more, Jirou’s fingers trailed from his hair down to his neck, and the light touch made him scrunch up his shoulders and giggle reflexively.

Both of the girls’ faces lit up.

“N-No, wait, I – please, no!” Denki squealed when they both scribbled their fingers along his sides and stomach. Giggles spilled from him in light, soft waves as he began to squirm. “Nohohohoho, wahahahait! Please, I’m t-tihihihihihihicklish!”

“We figured as much,” Jirou teased. She took the initiative and reached for the previously discarded necktie, using it to bind Kami’s wrists together quickly and with surprising sufficiency. Then she and Momo pushed him to the floor and raised his arms above his head.

Denki’s breath hitched. “Please, girls, I cahahan’t, I’m too – ah! Too tihihihihicklish! Nohohohohohohoho!”

Giggling along with him, both Momo and Jirou gently scribbled all over his torso, from his stomach to his sides to his ribs and even his underarms. Denki remained a giggly, blushy, squirmy mess beneath them, babbling out pleas for mercy all the while.

“Aw, look how cute you are!” Momo gushed teasingly.

Jirou smirked. “Not as tough as you think you are, huh, sparky?”

“Plehehehehehehehease! Please, stahahahahahahap, it t-tihihickles too muhuhuhuhuch!” Kami squealed and squirmed and tried to roll out of their grasp, but Momo quickly straddled him, keeping him pinned in place. This only seemed to make him more sensitive, as his giggling became gentle laughter and his face a shade darker. “Nahahahahahahahaha! Oh, gohohohod, stahahahahahap!”

“Hmm…” Jirou hummed, leaving his torso to Momo while moving a bit lower down to grab at his knees. “How about here?”

“NOOOOHOHOHOHO NO NOT THEHEHEHEHEHERE!!” All at once Denki was shrieking with laughter, kicking his legs desperately while his bound hands came down to try and shove Momo off of him. “AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA PLEASE NOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!”

“Ooh, good spot, huh?” Jirou chuckled, forcing his legs to lay flat on the ground so she could straddle his shins and worm her fingers underneath to the sensitive knee pits. “What if I do this?”

“AAAHH!! NOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!” Denki tossed his head back and literally screamed with laughter, his cries sounding more and more like he was losing his grip on sanity. “GAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! STOP PLEHEHEHEHEHEHEASE I CAHAHAHAN’T!!”

Momo laughed, grabbing his arms that were trying to shove her away and pinning them back above his head. Up close like this, she could see his blush had spread to his ears and neck, and mirthful tears were springing to his eyes as he tossed his head back and forth wildly, laughter escaping him faster than he could keep up with.

“PLEASE, I—!! IT’S TOO MUHUHUHUHUCH I CAHAHAHAHAN’T--!!” Denki laughed so hard that not only did the first mirthful tear escape him, the air around him began to spark. “I’M G-GOHOHOHOHONNA BLOHOHOHOHOW A F-F-FUHUHUHUHUHUSE IF YOU D-DOHOHOHOHON’T STAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAP!!”

“Don’t stop?” Jirou laughed. “Well, you asked for it!”

“Kyouka!” Momo cried, startled when the sparks around Kami intensified. “He’s not kidding! Ease up a little, okay?”

Jirou glanced up, surprised, but took her girlfriend’s word for it and stopped tickling under his knees, instead skittering over his thighs very lightly. “Is he all right?”

“Plehehehehehehease,” Denki begged, his laughter far less dangerous now but coming out in gasps and wheezes, his face as dark red as it could possibly be before it turned purple. Hysterics-induced tears streamed down his face. “Plehehehehease, stop, I beheheheheheg you…”

“We’d better stop,” Momo decided, climbing off of their boyfriend and reaching up to untie his hands.

Jirou followed her lead, seeing Kami’s face for the first time and feeling a slight pang of guilt, knowing she’d pushed him to this state.

“Denki, baby,” Momo murmured, discarding the tie for the second time that night and brushing his spiky blonde hair out of his face. “Are you okay? Did we go too far?”

“I’m sorry,” Jirou added, moving up to where he lay gasping for air and putting a hand on his heaving chest. “I didn’t realize how much it tickled.”

“D-Don’t…apologize…” Kaminari gasped. He sat up with their help and grinned tiredly at them. “I don’t usually like being tickled, mostly because I know how dangerous I can be when I lose my self-control like that. I just didn’t want to hurt you two. That’s why I needed you to stop.”

“We’re sorry,” Momo said, and Jirou nodded her agreement.

He put an arm around each of them and hugged them close. “You’re fine, girls. I’m not mad. And I…I don’t mind if you tickle me again. I mean…it’s you, after all. But just…be careful, okay? I can’t help it if I lose control of my quirk when I’m losing my mind laughing.”

Momo and Jirou wrapped their arms around him and each other, forming a group hug that felt especially intimate to all three of them.

And once again, Denki Kaminari thought how lucky he was to have not just one but two girlfriends who were so caring and understanding. He was indeed a lucky man.

#fanfiction #tickle fic #12 days of ficmas #boku no hero #my hero academia #bnha #mha #denki #kaminari #momo #yayorozu #jirou #tickling #ticklish #poly ship #flustered #blushing #cute

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sunflowerandco · 3 years

Text

After the Fact: Act IV - Resolve

Act I / Act II / Act III

Rating: M/T

Courtney put the finishing touches on her final history paper. She had spent the better half of her morning, not to mention the week, perfecting the last portion of her thesis statement equipped with a counterargument and conclusion to complete. With her last task being editing, she gave herself five minutes to look at her phone. She noticed an abundance of messages from an assumed-to-be-hungover Bridgette in the aftermath of her bachelorette party.

thanks for taking me home court

at least i assume u took me home

i don't remember much haha

Courtney chuckled as she read the amount of mind gymnastics Bridgette put herself through. The coffee she attempted to sip on was beyond cold at this point.

Yes, that was me lol. Rest up for tomorrow's rehearsal dinner.

She shifted her focus to her laptop again before she heard their bedroom door close, and footsteps grow closer. Duncan entered the living room with his flannel half-buttoned, and his hair still wet from the shower. She remembered his excitement from the other day about having two new clients book appointments at the tattoo shop for today, and figured he was getting ready to head out. "Morning, Princess. How's the paper going?" She responded with her eyes still on the screen, studying each sentence's legitimacy.

"I'm done actually! Now all it needs is a little polishing."

"Even after being partying all of last night?"

"Luckily, I never get drunk to the point where I can't function the next day," Courtney stretched her arms out. "And can still tend to my maid of honor duties." Duncan caught her wrists by his hand in a flirtatious effort to get her attention, encouraging a longer break from her extensive work. She had been going at it for nearly four hours before he walked in. He had no intention of breaking her focus earlier, but this moment was an exception.

Courtney looked at him over her shoulder signaling for him to let go and placed her fingers on the keyboard again. "What about you? Were you handling the 'best man' title properly?" Duncan smirked before teasing her. "I am. But I could hardly focus with all the attention I was getting last night." Courtney rolled her eyes while he added on. "How was the club last night?"

Courtney played up her response to throw him off. "Oh, nothing. The usual strip club activities. Drinks flowing, ass and abs in your face," She turned to face him over her shoulder again. "Bridgette and the girls seemed to really enjoy themselves."

Duncan hunched over to the level of her desk chair, placing his hands on her shoulders. "They can't do this though," he said softly in her ear. He kissed slowly down her neck and Courtney's head automatically tilted to the left to give him better access. She still tried to keep her eyes on her paper, but the lower his hands went down her arms, the more her concentration wavered. She inaudibly gasped when she felt his fingers cling to the hem of her shirt, his knuckles grazing her sides. His voice still rang softly in her ear. "Want me to stop?" Duncan faced her and waited for her answer.

Courtney shook her head no, and Duncan's hands made their way underneath her shirt and lightly brushed up and down her waist. His lips traveled from her neck to her shoulder, and his hands brushed up once more before they cupped her breasts. She gasped lightly at the sensation the pattern of his thumbs circling gave. Every flick sent shocks down to her core. She could barely get his name out of her mouth.

"Duncan..." She could feel him smirking against her neck, and she rolled her eyes.

"Tell me what you want." His hands remained under the tight fabric of her shirt. Truth be told, he wanted her since last night. Being surrounded by other women just made him want Courtney even more. His mind filled with visuals of the two of them, and he couldn’t, would never complain.

It increasingly became more prevalent to Duncan that he didn't want to see anyone else the way he saw Courtney. It had been that way for five years, and he couldn't see it changing at all.

"Take me. On the couch."

In one motion Duncan turned the chair on its wheels so that she was facing him. He wrapped one arm around her waist and one hand to the back of Courtney's thigh. Courtney was finally at eye level with him, and her hands cupped his face when she hungrily drew kisses on his lips, lightly tugging on his lower lip with her teeth. When she let go, he planted soft kisses on her inner thighs. Duncan had every intention to burn her tension away to construct new pressure by some incredibly desirable design. Courtney lied back when they heard her phone ring on the desk. Duncan sighed and loosened the grip he had on her thighs when her attention shifted.

She reluctantly got up from the couch to see Bridgette's name flash across the screen, and she picked it up to answer. "Hello?" She was met with a panicked, hasty voice on the line. Bridgette's words seemed to all get launched into the air at the same time.

"Courtney! I really need you! I woke up to go to the bathroom and I tried to take my ring off before going in the shower and it's not on my finger!" Courtney tried her best to calm her down and retrace her steps.

"Okay, okay, Bridgette. Slow down. It could've fallen off somewhere in your place. Or in your bed?"

"No I swear I looked everywhere! What if I l-left it at the club or something?"

"Then, we'll look there. We'll look everywhere we can, okay? Do you need me to pick you up?"

"Yes"

"Okay, then I'll be there in twenty minutes. See you soon." Courtney set her phone down and took a deep breath. Duncan made his way to her to rub his hands along her arms. "Go ahead. You have maid of honor duties, and I have to go head to the shop." She gave him a peck before turning to their bedroom to get dressed.

"Don't forget where we left off! And good luck today!" Duncan wouldn't forget feeling extremely lucky in their version of a predicament.

***

Courtney entered their apartment after having dropped off Bridgette once again from a panic-filled escapade that ended in good resolve. Her ring was found, back on her finger, and all each had to worry about was the rehearsal dinner happening on the next day. Courtney was more than prepared for the day. She was already looking forward to a night on the couch before another eventful day.

Courtney dumped her purse on the table in the hallway preceding the living room. She could make out that the lights were on, but it was eerily quiet. She called out for him.

"Babe? Are you in there?"

Duncan affirmed in a low voice. "Yeah. I'm in here."

When she walked into the living room, she found Duncan sitting on the couch. His head was down, and he was covering one side of his face with his hand. She hastily walked up to him and gently lifted his head by his chin to see fresh, major discoloration around his right eye that extended down to his cheek. His bright teal eyes stared into Courtney's earnestly. She instinctively opened her mouth in shock.

"What happened to you?" Courtney quickly turned on her heels. She grabbed an ice pack from the freezer and placed it above his cheek. He took hold of it before he started talking.

His voice remained as low as possible. His explanation was simple, but he couldn't express it simply. His tone seethed with unresolved anger. "I got in a fight at the shop." He got up from the couch and his back toward Courtney.

"A fight?! What the hell were you thinking?!" She followed behind him. "You could lose your job doing stuff like that!"

He finally turned to her in disbelief. "Is that all you care about?!" Courtney couldn't help but feel misunderstood. She was angry at him for misinterpreting; she was angry at herself for her choice of words. It grew harder for her to control the volume of her voice.

"No! Thats not the case. I just thought you'd learn not to risk good things for yourself and let your anger go for once!"

They usually bickered. Got under each other’s skin as a way of flirting, but this time felt incredibly different from the others. They could see each other's upset, their words jumbled up and void of understanding for the other's point of view. A passionate need for one to grasp onto the other's words but failing in execution.

Duncan's desire to explain himself diminished when he realized she already made her assumptions, but he still took offense to Courtney's words. "I’m not gonna be perfectly poised like you, so you can forget that Courtney." There wasn't much more she could say before he passed her to slam their bedroom door shut.

Courtney got so worked up she holed herself into her studying nook. She read over passages in her textbook until she wasn't thinking about Duncan anymore. One, two, three hours would pass by before she realized midnight had rolled around, and she was five minutes away from falling asleep onto her textbook. She had to join him in bed eventually.

She peered through the door. The light from the hallway highlighted the curves of Duncan under the comforter. She quietly lied on her side, but still faced the opposite way of him. It was the first and only time she ever felt cold under so many blankets. Courtney closed her eyes tightly and thought of every possible scenario she could imagine until her mind let her slip away.

***

Duncan's eyes fluttered open slowly when the morning sun beamed on his face through the window. He looked next to him to see the girl he pulled in every morning wasn't on her side of the bed. The gel pack he steadily held to his eye for most of the night landed off his body and onto the floor when he lifted the blankets. He left the room, and still no sign of Courtney. He assumed she already met with Bridgette to help prepare the rehearsal dinner.

Duncan stepped into the bathroom and was reminded of incident that gave him this very bruise. The memory of the conversation before the incident rang in his mind repeatedly. He had followed all the guidelines taught to him by Anya, kept his cool to the best of his ability, and he still managed to fuck up. He managed to mess things up with Courtney.

"I'm sorry, dude. You're way too drunk. I cannot give you a tattoo."

Still, he was met with hostility. An angry drunk who wouldn't take no for an answer. He thought about her once.

"Then what the fuck do you assholes get paid for?! Either you do what I ask, or I'll make you!"

He was shoved. Punched. He thought about her once more. He knew what she'd say, and situations like these kept her voice in the back of his head. But Duncan had a difficult time facing the habit of establishing this desired image in a new public setting. It worked out for him at times in his youth; hurting before he could get hurt and maintaining the reputation that kept people out of his way. Yes, his job is still intact, and he could thank Anya for her judgement. However, all he saw in the mirror was a mark brought onto him that, in retrospect, wasn't even worth it. The ice prevented it from shutting his eye completely, and only gave his lid a grim, purple hue. All he saw in their room was the empty bed he fell asleep angry and woke up in.

***

Duncan pulled up to the old manor the wedding and dinner were taking place. He stopped short of the fountain that led to the path of the entrance for valet. He opened double doors and was swept into high ceilings, music relevant to the occasion, and too much dark wood. He was seen by a few members of the wedding party, Marie, Chet, and Betty, by the coat room. He gave an efficient wave before realizing why their mouths were agape.

He gave up and instead walked down another hall, into another room, and there she was. The only woman that could catch his eye when he walked into a room. She had her back turned and was engaged in conversation with Bridgette and their high school classmate, LeShawna. She was wearing that red backless dress she brought home last week; her beautiful, warm skin uncovered. He knew he stared a little too long when Bridgette noticed him from across the room. Bridgette's halt in conversation made Courtney turn around. Their eyes automatically locked, and all the supposed anger expressed the night before didn't matter to him. He wanted to talk to her, to talk things out between them. He could admit they were both hurt in the process, and maturity begets resolve. But he was brought out of his thoughts when Geoff put a hand on his shoulder.

"Dude! I was looking for you! I need to-" He was cut off when Duncan turned to face him, and his focus ceased. "What the hell happened to you?" Duncan brushed it off, shook his head, and deemed it not worth explaining.

"Don't worry about it. What did you need?"

"Last minute question that I totally forgot to ask you: steak or fish?"

"Uh... steak?"

"Okay, great! That's what I told the caterers." A voice projected over the loudspeaker.

"Dinner is now served. Everyone can enter the dining room at this time."

***

After hours of preparation and arranging, Courtney and Bridgette were able to enjoy the venue they spent the entirety of their day in. Courtney stuck to the nervous bride's side throughout conversations she'd have with the wedding party. Of course, they were all people she grew close with over the years, but months of preparation would leave any bride fretful of failure. They were both truly able to relax when LeShawna arrived. They were free to talk and laugh about anything they wanted, and Courtney could take her mind off the one guy she looked around for every now and then. It was a special bond for those who've met in their youth could only describe.

"Yes, he told me he loved me after throwing up on a Ferris wheel. Thing was going 5 miles per hour!"

"He did not!" LeShawna said in between laughs. "Why am I just hearing about this now?"

"To save him from total embarrassment, LeShawna. That's why!" LeShawna turned to Courtney this time.

"What about you, Courtney? I think we all know Duncan said it first." Bridgette giggled as she added along.

"Oh my gosh, yes! I remember the day you told me like it was yesterday." Bridgette's voice wavered towards the end of her recollection. "You were so freaked out..." Her eye contact came to a complete stop, and Courtney's curiosity made her head turn.

That's when she saw him.

She felt a warm wave flow through her when she noticed his gaze. All the fear that kept her from hopeful thinking vanished after her eyes locked with his in some natural happenstance. He was wearing the black suit jacket and tie they picked out together last week. She hated to admit it, but the bruised eye and darkened knuckles made him even more enticing. Seeing him look for her created this magnetic pull that she couldn't fight off. Both of her friends' comments fell into the background; the sound of their voices fading more and more.

"His eye doesn't look too bad."

"The look is actually very on-brand for Duncan."

Their stare broke when Geoff appeared behind him, and he turned his head. She turned back to her friends slowly as well. She couldn't really say anything, nor did she want to talk about her problems on Bridgette's special weekend, so she just smiled half-heartedly. She had told Bridgette what happened before the guests arrived, but Courtney firmly restricted talking about it when the event started. She was spared of any questions when the loudspeaker ushered the wedding party into the dining room.

Courtney and LeShawna looked for their name cards in front of seats at the table. They sat down next to each other when Duncan found his own seat across from Courtney at the table while Bridgette and Geoff entered together.

"Hi everyone! I just wanted to thank all of you for coming tonight and taking on the task of becoming bridesmaids, groomsmen, best man, and maid of honor." Geoff continued this time. "We're really happy to share that my father, the host, has prepared a few words to say tonight." Bridgette sat down next to Courtney in the center, Geoff did the same across from her.

He stood up from his chair, notecards in his hand, and Courtney gave him her full attention. "Good evening. I'm Daniel Patton, this is my wife, Donna, and we're so thankful you could join us on the eve of Geoff and Bridgette's wedding. I'm so honored to be speaking in front of you all for two people who are very special to me. Way back when my boy was twelve, I knew Geoff was head over heels for Bridgette. He'd never stop talking about her, and he started making changes about himself. I never complained about it because that just meant from now on, he'd shower every day." He paused for a moment while light chuckles filled the room. "If there's one thing you could take away from this lovely couple, it would be their unconditional love for each other." Daniel gestured to them before he continued. "Love, above all, is a choice you make every day when you wake up in the morning." Courtney stared down into her lap as she took in his words. She tried not to remember the flames of her anger that lead her and Duncan to the state of their relationship and couldn't help but blame herself. She felt a light tap on her leg coming from across the table and looked forward. She looked at him and she swore time stopped.

He'd given her that look before. In times where she got so wrapped up in her own thoughts and couldn't think straight. She was brought back to her bedroom in her frantic search for their clothing and his incredulous ability to bring that sense of calm to her body with just his shirt and a look. She allowed herself to bore into his eyes for this moment as Daniel spoke words of guidance. She felt the dust of her dueling thoughts settle. "You choose the one you're in love with through life's trials and tribulations. Even in the midst of your anger, choose love. It's the ultimate test of strength. Choosing love is the reason I get welcome Bridgette to our family and celebrate the joining of two people who become better every day because of their union." Their exchange came to a halt when Daniel requested everyone to raise a toast to the bride and groom. Still, the feeling radiated in her chest knowing it would all be okay.

***

After the dinner came the afterparty, and as much as Courtney loved her friends, she admittedly needed a minute to give into her introverted nature. She spent the beginning of the event looking for Duncan to find her boyfriend getting swept up to party with the groomsmen. Courtney felt compelled to stop him. To get him to follow her. In an unusual feat, she snuck away to the second floor of the manor and found a balcony in one of the parlors looking over an abundance of mountains. She decided the houses on them always looked better far away. Courtney breathed in deeply and shut her eyes when a light breeze passed. Her head turned at the sound of the voice she wanted to hear all night.

"Want company?"

"Duncan, I-"

"Wait," He pulled her into a warm embrace, buried his face into her neck, and his frame swallowed hers the tighter he held onto her. Courtney sighed mostly in relief, and all the words she suppressed years ago in his car came rushing to her. She needed him to know everything.

"I'm sorry for the way I expressed my worry. I just saw the black eye and immediately thought about the past. I didn't even ask how it happened." By now they were face to face. "Losing your job is not what I care about most. It's losing you that scares me." She cursed herself when tears brimmed in her eyes. Duncan's hands traveled up to hold her face. "I-I love you so much, Duncan. You're the only person I see with me when I think of my future, and you're never this perfect version of yourself, and neither am I. We're just us, and it's enough." She didn't notice how heavy her breath felt until she let all the words out. He let her go before he started explaining himself.

"In a way I knew what you meant. Sometimes I just go back to the past, too, knowing there were no real consequences for the shit I did. Detention, suspension, and sometimes juvie. I never really cared. But I've gained too much these past few years to let some loser take it away from me." Duncan could only lay himself bare this way to Courtney. He was always flirtatious, and he had no problem telling her exactly how he felt. "You save my life every time, Princess. If it's me who you want to ruin yours, then I'm your guy." Courtney playfully rolled her eyes at the comment.

"Please ruin my life, Duncan." Courtney genuinely smiled knowing their lives could go back to how they love it. Duncan wasted no time to express the thought he'd been holding in since last night.

"Don't have to tell me twice. Also, you can stop pretending my eye doesn't turn you on."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh, come on, Courtney." Duncan slowly inched closer to her. "You're telling me you don't want me, right here, right now?" Courtney looked him up and down and turned her back on him as she held onto the railing of the balcony.

She had to admit the clash of his formal wear with his bruises aroused her in every aspect. While her mind kept her too lost in thought to respond, Duncan hunched slightly over her, his hands on her shoulders, and left kisses down her neck with every statement.

"I want you. I want to pick up where you told me not to forget, and you look incredibly sexy in this dress."

She turned to face him and kissed him in an ardent haze. Every pattern they drew made her want to deepen the kiss. She ran her tongue lightly across his lower lip, and he parted his lips wider to give her enough space to pour all her love onto him.

Courtney pulled him in close enough to have her back leaning on the balcony. Duncan had one hand in her hair and another hand on her bare back pressing her against him.

Courtney stole a moment to look behind them to see no one outside currently. Duncan leaned in, and her hand stood on his chest to slow him down. Her mind jumped back and forth between chasing release in this setting, but she couldn't withstand the pull. "I can't believe I'm saying this... Did you bring protection?"

"Always do."

"I hate y- ah!" Courtney yelped as Duncan lifted her over his shoulder from the balcony to the parlor. When Duncan lied her down on the chaise lounge, Courtney sat up to kiss him again. Duncan used one hand to hold her back and the other to loosen his tie. In hushed exchanges and rushed session, Courtney contradicted her words over and over, and knew she would continue to do so for years to come.

A/N: I apologize if this was out of character as i'm still trying to determine their words/choice as adults this far in their relationship. ANYWAY i hope you liked. tell me what you think

#td courtney #duncney #duncney fic

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hailbop1701 · 3 years

Text

Chapter Two: A Pale Horse

Chapter two is here guys! I'm so excited to see what you all think! Things are starting to heat up and they discover who Bones really is. Each chapter is going to be darker than the last so it's all down hill from here. I just want to say a big "THANK YOU!" to my wonderful beta @dw-writes you my dear are amazing and I truly appreciate you taking the time to do this for me.

- H ❤🖖

“Welcome to HELL,” Kirk whispered, a deep frown marring his face. As soon as McCoy drew his phaser Jim did the same.

“Bones…”

McCoy gritted his teeth; if his own personal ‘Red Alert’ wasn’t flashing before, it sure as hell was now. “We need to go,” McCoy said with finality, his searching eyes darting around the area.

Lieutenant Beckworth appeared on his other side, phaser raised, following McCoy’s movements. The three Ensigns behind them warily followed suit, raising their phasers much more slowly and unsure.

“Sir?” Ensign Bitar asked, perplexed. McCoy could smell the excitement and adrenaline pouring out of her. Kirk glanced over his shoulder at the young woman, giving her a little smile that looked more like a grimace.

“Don’t worry, Ms. Bitar, Bones is just being paranoid, as usual,” he offered in a teasing manner, trying to keep his people calm.

Leonard snorted humorlessly at his best friend’s words. “Oh yeah, the obvious sign in front of us has nothing to do with my paranoia, Captain,” he muttered dryly as they moved forward through the long entrance. ‘An Atrium,’ he observed as he took in every possible exit and vantage point.

‘Cameras; we’re being watched,’ McCoy took a deep steadying breath. Wrinkling his nose in distaste, he felt his stomach do a flip at the familiar smell: death and decay mixed with blood. “Jim I know you think I’m being paranoid here but we really need to go I’m not fucking kidding this time.”

Kirk looked at the CMO with pursed lips and careful eyes, after a second he nodded. “Okay Bones, we’ll go back and regroup.” The Captain pulled out his communicator and flipped it open. The thing chirped as he worked the dial. “Kirk to Enterprise. Come in Enterprise,” there was nothing but static.

Leonard cursed again under his breath.

“Oh no,” Ensign Lawrence squeaked, cringing at the glare Bitar gave him that clearly said, ‘Grow a pair’

A low amused feminine chuckle echoed throughout the room, it came from everywhere and nowhere. The giant screen that hung crookedly on the wall beside them buzzed and flickered to life. A figure sat lazily in a Captain’s chair; the image was too dark to see them clearly, but the silhouette made it clear that it was a woman.

“Jim!” McCoy hissed suddenly as the Captain moved steadily closer to the screen a good twenty feet away. Kirk held up his hand to reassure McCoy that he was alright and kept walking. Growling, Leonard strode purposely after him with his phaser at the ready.

Beckworth and his little gaggle turned so that their backs were covered. “I have a bad feeling about this, LT.” Lawrence hissed his voice pitching slightly.

“Shut it, Gabe,” Bitar growled out keeping her voice low.

“Both of you, can it!” Beckworth barked, not taking his eyes off the darkened corners of the room. Lawrence hummed nervously but kept a steady hand with his phaser as he scanned the room for any threats.

Chekov crept next to McCoy, his tool kit gently slapping against his hip, the strap digging uncomfortably against the kid’s neck. He had his phaser raised slightly but kept it pointed at the ground as Kirk walked ahead of him.

“Damn kids,” McCoy hissed. The nervous and foreboding energy crackling around him made his hair stand on end and his teeth itch. He split his senses apart: he kept his eyes on Kirk and the room before him, while he listened to what was behind him: Beckworth’s steady breaths, Lawrence’s hitched nervous gait, Bitar’s grinding teeth, she was gripping and regripping her phaser, and then, there was Chekov - the kid was mumbling in Russian, doing his best to keep calm. McCoy’s brow furrowed a little at his words, ‘Something about different plants and how to identify poisonous flora...he was reciting a botany textbook,’ he thought, a brief flash of amusement and approval coursed through him. ‘Whatever works kiddo,’ he thought as he watched Kirk come to an abrupt stop, staring up at the screen with wide eyes.

Following his gaze, McCoy couldn’t help but snort and roll his eyes. Kirk was practically salivating and Leonard had a strong urge to smack the man upside the head to get him to focus on the problem at hand. He didn’t but he really should’ve.

A beautiful Orion woman grinned wickedly down at them. She sat sprawled on what had to be a pilfered captain’s chair leaving nothing to the imagination; her curves were captured perfectly in the armor she wore. A phaser dangled from her fingers and rested on her inner thigh. The come hither look she shot him caused McCoy to raise an eyebrow, sure he loved a beautiful woman like the next guy. Most men (and in large cases women) would have been attracted to her. But he could only feel annoyance and disappointment. He could see under the beauty, down to her core. There was nothing there but a cold empty space, like a black hole but more crazy and sadistic.

Internally he practically sees Reaper poke and prod at the back of his mind wanting to take the reins on this one. Things weren’t right and Doctor Leonard McCoy wasn’t needed right now. Everything here already smelt dead and the away team was in way over their heads, if the warning bells in his head were anything to go by.

McCoy relaxed into a better stance and held himself like he used to, he practically melted into John Grimm again. His eyes were a touch colder, his walk more sure and graceful. Moving forward automatically Reaper stood slightly in front of Kirk and Chekov like an unmovable shield.

The scowl on his face became more and more pronounced the longer he and the woman stared at one another. Kirk looked back and forth between Reaper and the Orion woman, totally confused and in mild offense. She wasn’t interested in the starship captain what-so-fucking-ever.

The Orion chuckled again upon seeing Reaper’s darkening face. She leaned forward so she was in the light. Her face was as pleasant as the forests on Dakala; beautiful and completely deadly.* She was the hunter and they were the prey; they were right where she wanted them. She grinned wickedly before sighing, sounding almost bored. She looked at her phaser casually before she started speaking, her voice light and airy like a calm summer morning. “Your Earth history has a story. A story of four horsemen and one of them was death,” she drawled, amused by the tale she spun for them. Like a spider playing with her caught flies, the woman kept going, “He rode upon a pale horse bringing the peace and silence of death to all who oppose him,” she disappeared and the image of Enterprise filled the screen, pale in the light of the stars. Jim stiffened, an angry glint flashed in his ocean eyes before the look of shock and disbelief filled them.

Reaper felt the floor disappear beneath him; the air in his lungs left as if Sarge had come back and punched him in the stomach. The next set of images were all too familiar, they were of him but from so long ago.

“RRTS Unit Six: Full name Johnathan Leonard Grimm - Call-ID ‘Reaper’ - born October, 21st, 2017,” Kirk whipped his head around confusion coloring his face. The picture on the screen showed John in full gear, hair buzzed down, jaw set, and eyes void of emotion. The perfect soldier. “Bones? ” Jim’s voice was hushed so the others couldn’t hear him. Though they were looking at the screen with their own confused expressions. Jim sounded shaky and unnerved, no doubt he was being plagued by memories of Kahn.

John took a deep breath and turned his dark hazel eyes onto his best friend. “Sorry kid,” was all he could muster at the moment his usual southern drawl gone. He sounded almost defeated, he never wanted Jim to find out like this. Hell, he didn’t want the kid to find out at all if he could help it.

A flash of multiple emotions shot through Jim’s eyes before settling on a blank expression that would make a Vulcan proud.

The screen split down the middle showing two different starship bridges. One belonging to the Orion bitch (who was enjoying the drama unfolding in front of her immensely) and the bridge of the Enterprise. His crew, his friends, stared back at them - him - in shock, horror, and hurt confusion. All except for Spock of course he was doing his insufferable Sphynx impression again. Though his eyes spoke volumes; fascination, anger, and pity?

The Orion leaned forward licking her lips,

“I’ve caught myself a Reaper” she giggled almost bouncing up and down in her seat. John growled low, almost baring his teeth, but she seemed to love that.

“What do you want?” Kirk bellowed, throwing his hands up in the air, the phaser hand flying wildly. John tilted his head just enough to avoid being cuffed.

“A game Captain! It’s quite simple really; all you need to do for the sake of yourselves and your crew is to survive!” her voice was sickly sweet and patronizing like she was explaining to a five-year-old how to play a quick game of poker.

‘Yeah, she’s fucking insane,’ John thought dryly with no amusement.

Kirk glowered at the woman, “You seem to know who we are but we have no damn clue about you, so tell me before I come up with something unpleasant,”

The Orion smirked and leaned back. Crossing her legs she pouted for a second in thought, she was weighing the pros and cons of having her name out there it seems. After a moment of deliberation, she waved a hand at the muffled warning coming from the background. “Call me Veera.” Veera’s eyes slid from Kirk over to John again, a predatory stare if there ever was one. Sighing he stepped forward so he was a few feet in front of the group “I’m sure you have almost everything figured out, don’t you John?” she murmured knowingly.

Reaper’s jaw clenched at the use of his birth name, “I imagine you blocked us off, no transporter, no direct contact with the Enterprise. Other than what you got set up and I reckon that you put more than just us through this little game of yours. How many are watching Veera?” he let his southern drawl color his voice again.

The woman clapped slowly at his little assessment, she nodded her head approvingly “I activated a jamming device just after you teleported onboard, the holovid the Enterprise and my little collection of misfits are being streamed, is through the station itself. And yes you’re right, you’re not the only ones to play. I had to test and test and test before I could let you find me!”

“The missing ships,” Jim hissed in realization, his fists clenched and he visibly shook with anger.

Veera shrugged nonchalantly, “They were such a bore! They lost way too easily but I suppose it gave us more time to play around with that serum of yours. You do remember C-24 right, John?”

Reaper almost choked at her words, the horror on his face was abundantly clear for everyone who had eyes on him. They were either grinning madly or filled with dread and concern. He did his best to calm his breathing, the panic attack that had been looming in the back of his mind was bubbling to the surface.

Jim may have been angry at him and wanted answers but he still stepped closer holding a hand out just above John’s shoulder, “Bones breathe,”

Veera mockingly pouted, “Those memories of yours must be awful, I’ve read every report the - oh what were they called - the UAC had on you, and honey it was delicious. How many did you kill to keep your blood away from them? How many did you slaughter when you found your sister and her family slaughtered in their beds?”

There were several gasps from spectators. John’s blood boiled and he burned like he was being raked over hot coals. Jim’s jaw dropped and his eyes grew sad before he covered it up again knowing that he hated pity. He didn’t dare look at the others or at the Enterprise crew, their emotions were clear by the tense silence. Veera giggled again, her white teeth glowed in the dim light of her ship as she grinned madly.

Reaper’s hands clenched into fists, his whole body shaking, something must have flashed in his eyes because Jim stepped away from him, motioning for the others to do the same. Veera chuckled darkly and tilted her head as she listened to someone off-screen.

She hummed excitedly “I’ve left you a little something to help you, and you’re going to need it, John. These creatures are much more different from what you remember. They will infect anyone and every one good or bad and they are oh so hungry,” And with that, the screen faded to black.

John sucked in a breath pushing back whatever he was feeling into a box and locked it away. ‘Grieve for this life later, you have a job to do’ he thought sadly. His eyes scanned the room and immediately found a crate lying off to the side on an information desk. Striding over to it John quickly tore open the lid sending it sailing across the room. Someone cursed behind him in surprise, he ignored the small group as he looked through the crate of supplies.

“You’re actually trusting that crazy bitch? What if she rigged the stuff?” Lawrence asked incredulously.

Beckworth appraised Reaper with a new outlook before shaking his head, “Nah she wants him to play too much. Wants to draw out the game not shorten it,”

John pulled out four tac vests with a grumble, looking over at Kirk he shook his head, “Get that neon sign off,” he indicated to his command gold. Jim wasn’t entirely sure what he was more surprised by the order itself or that he automatically followed it without question. “You too kid,” John mumbled, shooting Chekov an apologetic look. The young Russian scrambled in setting his things down so he could yank off his overshirt.

“Damn I’m happy I wore pants for this shit,” Bitar grumbled as she and two others from security shucked their colored shirts. Reaper huffed a humorless laugh, walking over to Jim he helped the captain into the vest securing it before moving on to Chekov. Freezing for a moment John cocked his head to the side, he could hear pounding footsteps and inhuman screams; they were getting closer by the second. Cursing he pulled off his blue shirt, tossing it to the side. He grabbed a kit belt from the crate and swung it around his hips. Tucking his phaser away for later John pulled out a few old-fashioned projectile weapons.

Shaking his head John loaded the belt with everything he could fit. Lieutenant Beckworth was working on doing the same thing. Checking over a replicated desert eagle Reaper glanced over his shoulder before hurrying in his movements.

“You know something we don’t, again?” Jim asked ice coating his tone. John in his hurried movements almost forgot how pissed off Kirk still was. The man hid it well. The others froze but John kept going letting the coldness waft over him.

“They’re coming and we really shouldn’t be here when they do,” was all he said clipping a couple of grenades to his belt.

“Vhose coming?” Chekov asked quietly it was the first time in while the kid spoke, his voice was cautious, fear only just breaking the surface.

Reaper’s forehead scrunched a memory floating to the surface. “Well the first time I faced these things, a man from my unit called them demons. He was the god fearin’ type,” he muttered in explanation. That made Kirk grimace and Chekov wince as if he regretted asking. John shoved a second knife into his boot and clipped another to his belt on his hip. The last thing he pulled from the crate made him pause and mutter a string of curses under his breath. In his hands sat an old, yet new rifle.

“Damn,” he shook his head ruefully hating the fact that he missed its weight in his hands.

“Old friend?” Jim asked sourly making John wince ever so slightly.

“You could say that,” he mumbled.

John placed his finger over the scanner and felt as his chest tightened as it rang out, “Former RRTS member verified, Call sign ‘Reaper,’”

He looked over at Jim who held another rifle in his hands, something newer and sleeker. They watched each other carefully, a silent conversation taking place between them.

“We’ll talk about this later,”

Reaper whipped his head around seconds before a door on the other end of the atrium burst open with a shattering crash. The others jumped in surprise,

“Move!” John shouted, pushing them ahead. They ran the length of the Atrium toward a set of glass doors that led to the rest of the station.

“What the fuck are those?” Kirk shouted looking over his shoulder briefly as he ran with John just behind him and Chekov urging them forward.

“As I said, demons!” was all John shouted pushing the two bridge officers through the sliding open glass doors.

John whipped around and fired his rifle. In quick accurate bursts, the screaming creatures fell; he stayed long enough for the others to rush past him before flying through the doors himself. John elbowed the door controls causing the red lights to flare, heavy metal blast doors slammed home just as the demons crashed into the glass.

Jim looked up from his bent position, “What the hell were those?” he asked panting.

Reaper grimaced. “Those were- they were people once before they got infected with a compound called C-24. It’s basically - it’s an extra chromosome essentially,” he groaned at more than one confused face. Running a hand through his hair John moved forward further into what looked to be one of the main shopping areas. ‘Damn malls,’ he thought with a grumble.

“But you were injected by this C-24 da?” Chekov curiously asked, trying to keep the hint of wariness from his voice. John flinched but nodded at the young navigator, “Back when it was first discovered C-24 chose who became a monster or who became - eh superhuman I guess. Healing is fifty percent quicker, strength, moving faster, and unfortunately, aging is...slow,”

John stopped eyeing the vast area critically, “This version of C-24 is twisted beyond comprehension and that’s saying something,” he whispered and gestured for the others to keep quiet as well. John looked to the side allowing one of his ears to face the shopping center.

Taking a deep breath he filtered the sounds around him, he ignored the erratic heartbeats of the team behind him, and the crunch of glass under their boots as they shifted and walked. The faint sound of sleepy growls and snorts made John purse his lips, it was pretty far off to immediately worry about. ‘Best to keep an eye out anyway,’ he thought biting the inside of his cheek.

“Superhuman, does that mean hearing as well?” Bitar asked incredulously catching onto what John was doing.

The man looked at her a bit sheepishly, he opened his mouth to respond but the Captain interrupted with: “Wait a minute super hearing? Does that mean during the academy…”

John chuckled dryly “Oh yeah, every time. Why do you think I started carrying earbuds with me everywhere I damn went?”

Kirk blanched looking mortified “So you- oh no,” he whispered mostly to himself before laughing nervously at John’s little crooked smirk.

Reaper jerked his head in the direction of the railway system. “Come on Dynamo,” he snorted, making Kirk go completely red in the face out of embarrassment. Lawrence and Chekov snorted covering their laughter with little coughs.

“So I’m guessing you hear all the gossip, McCoy?” Beckworth asked amused, both Chekov and Lawrence became quiet.

John rolled his eyes calling the tram, “Yeah, not very creative if I’m going to be completely honest,”

Jim choked on a laugh remembering what they called McCoy on the ship and in the academy, “Some of those nicknames aren’t legal on most planets I think,” he pointed out smirking. John just scowled at his best friend - well, hopefully, they were still best friends anyway. He didn’t really want to think about that right now, the thought that he might have to leave the Enterprise hurt enough as it was.

----------oOo----------

The tram hummed and slid to an easy stop, moving in front of the group John readied his weapon and listened. No movement, no snarling, and no stench of death, they were clear. The doors hissed open just as he lowered his rifle to point at the ground. The only thing John could smell was faint traces of blood and dry air.

“Clear,” Beckworth confirmed coming up to stand beside him.

John had to silently applaud the man, he stepped up without hesitation. He wasn’t deterred by what they were up against nor was he rattled by the revelation of who “Leonard McCoy” really was. He had a job to do, and he was going to damn well do it. John nodded to Henry as he entered the tram, double and triple-checking to make sure it was safe for the others. Bitar and Lawrence followed suit while Beckworth stuck with the Captain and Chekov. They were the most important of the away team, that didn’t change.

Chekov scurried over to the tram controls and grimaced. The conductor's seat was smeared with blood; enough blood to convince the young navigator that whoever worked here was surely dead. Pavel jumped when a hand gently landed on his shoulder.

“You okay kid?” John asked softly, his eyes showed so many emotions but the ones that stuck out to Chekov the most was- understanding, pain, grief, and steely determination.

Swallowing hard Pavel squared his shoulders and nodded, “Da, I’m alright,” he whispered. John looked at him for a long few seconds before nodding and squeezing his shoulder.

“Bring up a map of the base if ya can. We need to see what we’re working with and the best way to get out,” John said letting his southern twang color his voice, it had its desired effect as Chekov relaxed further. The kid hummed as he worked at the console, muttering to himself about equations and formulas. John drifted back to where the rest of the away team sat. They were in a heated discussion about their plan of action. John leaned against one of the handrails silently listening to the debate. Jim was in charge of course, but the young Captain valued the opinions of his crew.

“We need to take down the jammer so we can beam the hell out of here,” Ensign Bitar said, arms crossed, the girl was terrified. John was rather impressed at how well she was hiding it.

Lawrence sat hunched over in one of the plastic seats head in his hands. He was continuously pulling at his hair. “How are we going to do that when we don’t know where the hell it is?” he groaned tilting his head up at the young woman. Bitar scowled at him but otherwise said nothing. Beckworth leaned back with a heavy sigh, he looked to be deep in thought. John’s gaze moved to Kirk, the kid was pacing back and forth muttering under his breath. Jim was working on a plan, and just because it was him it was going to be crazy.

Growling in frustration Jim stopped in front of John, “Got any ideas?” he asked bitingly.

John chewed on the inside of his cheek, “Chekov is working on getting us a map, so we know what we’re dealing with. I think our best bet is to either make our way to the base's bridge or to engineering.” he said with a shrug. Kirk opened his mouth but snapped it shut again,

“The bridge will give us all the information that we need. It being a starbase means it will also be connected to operations.” Jim mused running a hand through his hair. John nodded slowly,

“Genesis is also connected to Marcus and Section 31 so along the way we’ll most likely find a lot of classified information. You being Captain of the fleet’s flagship also means that you’re would technically be under orders to retrieve all classified data and bring it back to HQ,” John let the unsaid “Including me,” hang in the air. The silence was almost deafening. Bitar looked down at her feet, Lawrence bit his nails nervously, and Beckworth frowned but ready to do whatever his Captain asked of him. Jim’s jaw clenched and he shook his head in denial,

“You got that map, Chekov?” John asked without having to turn to see the navigator enter the room.

Pavel sniffed, clearing his throat, “Da, I have the map of the station. I was also able to determine which areas are safe and which are breached.” Chekov handed the PADD over to John who gave the young man a tight smile of thanks.

He showed the device to Jim who began to swipe through it for a clear path to the station's bridge. “Shit,” he muttered, brows furrowed in frustration. The only clear path to the bridge was through what would most likely be the most populated areas.

John growled and cursed colorfully under his breath, in all honesty, he wasn’t surprised. “You don’t look, surprised Doctor,” Beckworth noted gruffly. All eyes snapped to the Enterprises CMO.

The man gave a shrug and spoke without looking up from the PADD in his hands. “Veera is a psychopath, an extremely smart one at that. She wouldn’t have let us near Genesis if this place wasn’t ready for us. She would have planned all of this to the very last detail,” He took and held up the PADD showing the map and raised an eyebrow at everyone, “This will give her audience somethin’ to watch. Chekov how easy was it to get this map?”

The navigator shifted uneasily, “I didn’t have to do anything, it was already downloaded onto the PADD,” he whispered, eyes wide.

“In order to win the game, we have to play the game,” Kirk muttered, taking the PADD back from John. The ex-marine scowled at the thought, he knew Jim was right but that didn’t mean he had to like it. Kirk looked at him grimly, “Looks like you have to put on a show Bones.”

John’s scowl deepened, he looked up at the obvious camera in the corner of the tram car. Flipping it off, John quickly pulled his handgun and shot the offending piece of tech. The rest of the group yelled covering their ears against the crack of the gunshot. Placing his sidearm back John snorted, “I’m just a regular ol’ show pony,”

Tags:

Everything: @thottiewithashotgun, @lauraaan182, @writerdee1701,@stileslover13-blog, @cowenby2, @bluesclues-1234

Hollow Castle: @chook007, @lauranthalasah

#star trek aos #Doom 2005 #Doom!Trek #leonard mccoy #leonard bones mccoy #leonard mccoy is john grimm #john reaper grimm #john grimm #hailey the queen of typos #hollow castle #The Four Horsmen Series #reaper!bones #james kirk #pavel chekov #redshirts #Welcome to HELL

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woogurl · 4 years

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i’ve been meaning to make this post a while ago, but i was uncertain if now was the right time to do it, it’s something that’s extremely controversial, but yes...

i decided to make a post regarding what i think woosan’s sexuality is, now i figured it was bad to just assume their sexuality but people assume all or at least most of the male/female kpop idols are straight anyway by default. which i don’t think is bad or illogical, seeing as most people are straight statistically.

not gonna lie, ateez is one of those groups that give me mad gay vibes tho. however, i won’t be analyzing the others as i don’t really watch much of their individual behavior or content, i think you should only make these when you’ve watched enough of their behavior.

as you know, i’m a woosan enthusiast, and a woo stan, but i’m not gonna just analyze their relationship, which i think is sufficient proof enough, but i’ve compiled everything that has led me to the conclusion that san is either bi(with male preference) or gay, and woo is bi.

lastly, i want to say just because someone is homophobic or really opposed to skinship with the same sex does not mean they’re automatically straight. sometimes it’s a coping mechanism, and just because they’re feminine, comfortable with their masculinity, support LGBT+, or okay with skinship with the same sex doesn’t mean their gay.

sometimes there really are NO signs.

just look at all of the idols people assumed were gay. momo/heechul, baekhyun/taeyeon, hani, kai(though mostly considered him to be bi). anyhow, my point is you just never know. lol

now, i’ll stop my rambling and get started. first let’s start with

S A N

now, i’ll be honest, i’ve always thought san was gay because how reserved he was and how shy and sweet he was around the members during their predebut days. i just felt like he was maybe shy because he hadn’t come to terms with he sexuality. i mean when i look at san during predebut, he literally was like a baby, and his mannerisms was so small and reserved. even his body was so tiny and fragile. however, this was because san was naturally skinny and it had always been a complex for him. in which he said he had a tough time gaining weight.

what we know about san’s former lifestyle is that he was a church boy, a farmer, a wannabe gamer and a freaking black belt in taekwondo and his dad was an owner of a taekwondo studio, he was one of the most popular kids, he had a pretty good relationship with his parents or at least now he does and his grandparents took good care of him when his parents didn’t.

but san still had low self-esteem. why? i really don’t know, but i would hazard a guess that it was because of his sexuality(this is just an assumption guys, not a fact). now remember san was part of the church, and he joined because a friend asked him too. they probably asked him because they figured he liked to sing and dance. although i think san was shy and self-conscious, i don’t that he was self-conscious about his abilities as you could see he did go to the church to sing and dance in front of a bunch of people. i think he had low-self esteem because of who he may have realized that he was.

here are some examples of what i mean.

there’s something that san continuously repeats and that is to learn to love himself, know his worth, and just simply love who he is. and i think that’s one of the reasons that san didn’t like church is because it went against who he was and is. if you watch videos of him in the church he really looks like he doesn’t want to be there. he looks so uncomfortable. he doesn’t just look like “ah, this is boring there’s nothing to do” but he looks more like he’s displaced. like he’s NOT supposed to be there. we learn later that san isn’t religious instead.

don’t you find it interesting that he made a direct correlation to his belief in god to his belief in himself. it was like he was saying, even though i don’t believe in god i believe in who i am. like i trust that who i am is correct.

another part of this video that i find interesting is the moment that they talk about how much they value each other(woo and san).

S: You’re cool and

S: I honestly

S: Now I can sincerely

S: To the people around me or my relatives

S: I can proudly say that my friend is Wooyoung!

S: You're that kind of friend

S: To that point where I'm not embarrassed

S: Or rather say you're my friend that's worth showing off!

S: I think this is more than enough!

a lot of people in the comments of this video said that they felt like this was a confession and i agree. i remember feeling odd at how san worded this, the first time his sexuality didn’t even cross my mind. i was just like oh, he’s probably embarrassed because woo’s so loud and shit. lol. but now it doesn’t make much since to me. the vibes here are very serious, and we all know that even though woo can be loud and noisy many atiny’s forget that he is also extremely mature. especially when he needs to be. not only that but san has said woo is very respecful to his elders, so i don’t think he would of been embarrassed by woo’s on camera behavior. i noticed before san said this he hesitated a bit, like should i say this or how should i word this. it was super sweet.

now, let’s talk about san describing his ideal type. in which he says the outside doesn’t matter and that he wants someone who is kind-hearted and warm. he wants someone who’s good to him.

there are a lot of moments translated where he used feminine pronouns, but others have clarified and said he did not mention any pronouns.

let’s also talk about that conversation he had with wooyoung where they talked about what kind of guys they liked. where woo was like, “i like cool guys” and san was like, “i like both cool and sweet guys” then there’s silence because they probably realize that it’s considered “weird”. then san says, “i’ll be quiet”. i honestly felt bad like ;c. he probably felt the need to stop talking about it because he realized that people would prob think that it was gay.

he also sang troye sivan my youth, but i honestly don’t think that it’s too relevant seeing as many kpop idols appreciate troye sivan. but it’s worth noting i suppose.

lastly, body language there’s just a lot of moments that can’t be explained. now i completely understand that korea is tote fine with males being close with one another but there are just some moments, that i believe, i don’t care how comfy you are with the same sex is questionable. lmfao.

mind you seconds before this san was just minding his own business but his expression completely changed when he saw woo seduc---i mean dancing in front of him. idc what anyone says, a straight man would never eye fuck another man like this. lmfao. there’s lust in those eyes and you can’t tell me there isn’t. san was literally checking him out.

san being completely comfortable with having his no-no on woo’s ass, these are both very intimate parts of the body. honestly, the simple fact that san likes spooning woo from behind all the time is suspect to me. lol. especially with the expressions he gives at times.

san’s reaction when woo gets too close to his face, he doesn’t flinch. he’s also clearly looking at woo’s lips. there’s also another moment like this where san becomes so flustered that he has to look away for a second. lmfao.

when i think two of the other members(i don’t remember who) had to do a couple dance. what they did was completely tame, but woosan over here took it up several notches and started dancing like they were at a gay bar. no one told them to do it, they just did.

next i want to point out how comfortable they are with the shipping. i already mentioned this in my woosan relationship post but they’re comfortable with the shipping, then i figured it was because they were comfortable with the relationship that they had. but now, i think they don’t mind it because they’re proud of who they are. it’s not just them being comfortable with woosan, but with their sexuality as well. so they’re like telling us we’re woosan but we’re also okay with our sexuality kind of thing.

lastly, i want to point out body language again for san, and this is honestly the ONLY reason why i believe he is somewhat bi and not completely gay. the way he interacts with fans. i know you’re all gonna say well, that’s his job. but, he seems to want to impress his fans or look good for them. san’s confidence has changed quite a bit and as yeosang once said, san’s kind of like a tough guy now, as mingi said he’s changed the most since debut. i think the reason satan--i mean san has become so powerful, and a sexy demon on stage is because he’s confident in who he is now and it really shows. i think san wanted to break those stereotypes of who he was and show people that he wasn’t weak or shy, but manly and sexy and the best in bed. but on stage he loves showing off his muscles and how flexible his hips are and even on vlive. most of the fans are women and i think to myself why would he do this if he was completely gay?

i just don’t think a completely gay man would not want to appeal to women all that much. then again it could possibly be because he enjoys getting those compliments and that’s what fuels his self esteem. it could be the compliments from the women and not the women themselves. i’m not completely sure, but the reason why he does this does matter. he likes receiving compliments not just from the fans but from anyone really. so i don’t know if the reason he shows off his manliness to fans is because he wants to appeal to women OR if he just wants to appeal to his self esteem. which is possible. you guys let me know what you think.

W O O Y O U N G

there really isn’t as much content for me to work with when it comes to woo because he refuses to post, but i’m so confident that this boy is bi that it’s not even funny. there’s not much predebut info, there’s not much info about his ideal type.

sighs

yo girl will work with what she’s got. now, woo has only playfully mentioned his ideal type. in which he usually automatically answers yunho. do i actually believe that? no. lmfao. i think woo was smart enough to have yunho as his default answer for this question really. instead of actually being attracted to yunho i think woo just admires yunho because he always answers yunho for a member he would switch bodies with as well. he always says yunho because he’s tall, fun, funny, handsome and has a nice figure.

but as you’ve all probably noticed he doesn’t really seem physically attracted to yunho, but you know(HAHA) who he is definitely physically attracted to?

seonghwa, without a doubt, i’m saying this with my whole fucking chest, okay? i have no doubt in my mind that woo is or at least was physically attracted to seonghwa.

that full post i made with woo trying to kiss seonghwa for the 100th time is all the evidence you need, but i’ll keep y’all entertained. i want you all to understand that seonghwa has said that woo kisses him so much off camera that he’s used to it, the fact that the members gasped so hard that they almost caught flies was mehmehable.

now you all will probably say that woo just loves kisses and that’s fine but he seems to want to kiss on the mouth too and that’s pretty gay. lol.

he literally looked at seonghwa’s mouth before he dived in for a kiss. cheek kisses and mouth kisses are two whole different vibes. not to mention he tried to kiss him again during this vlive and san. woo has literally tried kissing all of the members okay? lmfao. he’s just way too comfortable with it in my opinion.

woo has been hungry for seonghwa, and he knows it, we can also talk about how he has said twice that seonghwa has a pretty ass. which he isn’t wrong about. lmfao. we could also talk about that moment where woo literally looked down seonghwa’s shirt.

anyway, while i do think woo was physically attracted to him, i’m pretty sure he has some kind of intimate relationship with san now. i don’t wanna add those moments because it would just me repeated what i wrote for woosan relationship analyzes, woo has also shown a lot of interest in women during their america tour and he’s repeatedly gone to the same fancam of some women. it’s important to mention woo is naturally a flirt but he seems to flirt with the members as well, according to yeosang who said this during their christmas vlive. jongho has also said he wanted woo’s ability to flirt. so my best guess is that he probably flirted with the members in the past.

there’s also the clip of him telling a fanboy to go after the guy that he likes, and he was also surprised to hear that he had fanboys, and he seemed interested to know this information other than that i don’t have much evidence, but i think woo’s body language off camera with the members is plenty evidence really. lol. there’s just not many straight men i know who would be inclined to cling to another male as much as woo does.

anyway, i’m tired this was my woosan sexuality post. remember these aren’t facts just observations and opinions. ;)

#ateez #wooyoung #woosan #seonghwa #san #choi san

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loseyoutoloveme · 3 years

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will you do a song by song review for life support? i really liked the ones for sweetener and thank you next!

oh absolutely, i’d love to! thank you for asking and being interested 🖤 all thoughts below.

the beginning:

this was such a great way to open this album, it’s so cinematic and really sets the mood so perfectly. one of my fav instrumental intros i’ve ever heard.

9/10

good in goodbye: “you put the over in lover, put the ex in next.”

the lyrics are so wonderfully corny and i’ll love this song forever, like the chorus is literally just so fun to sing along to.

i do think it feels a little... shallow compared to the rest of the album, and the album being released so long after this song came out makes it feel disconnected from the rest. but i love it so i don’t care.

7.5/10

default: “i know, i know this must be coming for me, i swear, i swear i will be the end of me, the end of me.”

this song is just sooo...... OUCH!

i’m obsessed with the way the chorus just SOUNDS like an emotional spiral, like her life falling apart, like falling into a deep depression, and then the outro builds like destructive racing thoughts.

also i never noticed the wave crashing and the bubbles at the very beginning until really recently, and i love that little touch. the whole song feels so underwater. cloudy and fuzzy. it does a good job of depicting certain symptoms of various mental illnesses.

8.5/10

follow the white rabbit: “is it haunting, baby, that i’m wanting, baby, that i’m wanting, wanting you?”

i actually was fully not expecting to like this that much based off the snippets she’d shared, but omg this left me WEAAAAK on first listen, which was the best surprise

there are definitely so many layers to these lyrics too, despite it being just a bombastic sexy toxic love song on its surface, particularly when thinking about the album as a commentary on mental illness, and some of the breakup/love songs as metaphors rather than straightforward love songs. definitely about infatuation and toxicity and perhaps knowingly entering a bad relationship as a bad coping mechanism, a way to avoid dealing with your pain or (as we see in effortlessly) a way to just feel anything at all.

9/10

effortlessly: “i hold my breath to breathe, hurt me so i feel, used to do these things so effortlessly somehow.”

oh god this song is just a punch in the stomach

i ALSO didn’t really expect to love this one based on snippets but the lyrics are just devastating and perfect and i hope speak to anybody who has struggled with self-harm and medication.

i don’t even have thoughts on this song, it just makes me go jsn*@(#nkdasdnkasd7*@U#j2k3n

love that this is such a fan favourite. it deserves!

10/10

stay numb and carry on: “truth is it was never love, your fault if you thought it was.”

the reverse “i’ve become emotionless” at the beginning >>>

also love the “i was gin and you were toxic . . . wish we’d just stayed plaTONIC” like a platonic relationship would be the opposite of toxic. it’s such fun wordplay.

also “i don’t feel like anyone” makes me emo, she really just slid the most simple but heartbreaking lines in everywhere and you don’t notice them until they hit you out of nowhere one day and you’re like ...OH

AND THE WAY HER VOICE STARTS TO GO MONOTONE AT “i’ve become emotionless”

in conclusion, madison beer is a vessel for god

10/10

blue: “you could be as sweet as honey but i knew the darkness in your mind.”

this is my least favourite on the album but it’s still fantastic

the lana influence is clear without being too copycat, like it’s still SO madison. sorta like lana’s video games modernized and adapted into something truer to madison’s vibe.

love love love the whole outro

glad that this wasn’t a single like it was planned to be

7/10

interlude: “would you do that shit for me too?”

VOCODER RIGHTS

this album in general is just not really for people who don’t like vocoders and lots of technical effects. i looove that she leaned into it so hard bc it’s so HER.

this song also has so much depth for an interlude, relaying the experience of feeling SO hard about people, and realizing like you’re putting in way more than you’re getting back.

the post-chorus is like... 🤩🌌💫☄️🌠

7.5/10

homesick: “these humans speak my language, still don’t understand it.”

THIS SONG...... IS MY BABY......

oh god it just breaks my heart on every listen. the image in my head is of a little girl talking to the stars.

and why does the line about her mom and dad make me wanna cry every time? i have no idea.

I BELONG IN SPACE...... FLOATING WITH DEBRIS.......

i’m sure she’s not the first person to ever use this metaphor for mental illness, expressing the alienation of mental illness (especially one as stigmatized and misunderstood as bpd) by talking about LITERAL aliens sdkjfsdfksd, but she does it SOOOOO well and sincerely that it feels like it’s uniquely hers.

the rick & morty sample is so funny and so weird and so madison. i will probably never watch an episode of that show in my life.

10000000000/10 this song is the loml

selfish: “shouldn’t love you but i couldn’t help it, had a feeling that you never felt it.”

my absolute favourite of all of the singles, noooo question about it. it’s a perfect, perfect, perfect song.

two years, alone on new years’, nightclubs, gemini... women writing lyrics with very specific details about the shitty men that the song is about... it’s everything to me.

this song will just NEVER age. every time i listen to it, it’s like the first time all over again.

10/10

sour times: “don’t know what song of mine you heard that made you think i’d want to spend the night with you.”

home with you’s big sister<3

not the strongest lyrics, but the concept and production are more than strong enough to carry the song.

she came on this bitch mad as hell

also love that this have been another fan favourite, seemingly??

men gross

9/10

boyshit: “don’t know how to talk or communicate, we’re so on and off, to you it’s a game.”

it took me awhile to get into this when it was a single ngl, probably because it came out the same night as evermore sjdknfsfnkjsd, but once i got into it, it became the best song ever

she’s soooo reliable with her “men ain’t shit” songs ugh

8.5/10

baby: “i’m a handful but that’s what hands are for.”

when this came out as a single it was the only thing i listened to for a solid week and a half. just an excellent song. the chorus is evvverrryttthhhiiinnnnggg.

WHAT IS IT SO CATCHY FOR?

9.5/10

stained glass: “my life’s a still fading memory of what i can’t have, and everything ’round me is starting to fade into black, but black and white is so much better, i’m learning how to hide my colours.”

i’m so surprised by how much non-stans seem to love this omg, it’s never been a fav of mine, as much as i still love it

but i’m obsessed with how different and distinctly madison it is

also this is a much more genuine take on the “pls stop being mean to me just bc i’m famous / you don’t know what people are going through” type of song than most of the others i’ve ever heard. her pain is evident, and the soft “i just might break” is just..... </3

the glass breaking and little scream are so good

she loves a good metaphor and so do i!

7.5/10

emotional bruises: “how do i word this? was about to write you this letter, but it was just curses in cursive, you probably deserve it.”

this was definitely my most anticipated song along with everything happens for a reason, like i listened to the snippet on repeat CONSTANTLY lmao. and the full song definitely lived up.

the scribbling sound is so fun, i love her obsession with little real-life sound effects

10/10

everything happens for a reason: “i still can’t find a reason you’d wanna hurt me so bad.”

THIS SONG IS VERY MUCH EVERYTHING

again, this was for sure one of my most anticipated songs and just kjsadsdkajsm god i love love love it

i think she posted a video one time of the song over a clip of the mermaids from peter pan and it was so pretty and i still picture that video when i hear this song. it’s just soooooo hazy and dreamy and retro and perfect.

also the song on the album where she got to show off her vocals the most. she found her niche with this song, truly.

100/10

channel surfing/the end: “YOU’REBADFORMYHEALTHISHOULDPROLLYKEPTSOMEHELPICANTCONTROLMYSELFIMADDICTEDOTHEHELL”

oh my god i was FLOOOOOORED at the dear society clip. dear society was and is one of my FAVOURITE songs, and i appreciate her reasoning for not including it on the album (just wanting some space for a new song instead of one we’d already had for so long), but it did hurt a lil. i was so happy she found a little way to include it :’) rip to hurts like hell tho since she didn’t get the same treatment sjdnksd.

the channel surfing is also just such a fun concept for an outro.

and her laughing with her producers at the end followed by such a sweet calming tropical instrumental...... oooo it’s so nice, it feels like the calm after the storm.

10/10

overall, this album was just SO worth the wait, it’s so fantastic, it’s the loml, one of my favourite albums ever. i LOVE that it’s helped anyone with BPD feel seen and understood, and as someone who doesn’t have bpd but has a couple of loved ones who do, the emotions she expressed in these lyrics have helped me to understand this disorder more too. just such a special album.

most of the criticism i’ve seen of the album has been that it’s overproduced, and that’s definitely criticism that i understand, bc it IS heavy on the technical side and some people just don’t like very heavy production, buuuut... some people do! i do! madison does! and heavy production does not automatically make an album bad. this type of production isn’t something that i expect her to move away from, because it’s clearly her thing, and maybe that just means her place in the industry will be more with the heavy heavy pop fans and maybe even in more hyperpop circles. i also think it’s SUPPOSED to be overproduced; it’s supposed to be a mess of emotions and sometimes a little chaotic. she executed it very well.

i hope by the time her next album is out, people will stop comparing her to like every single artist out there. some reviewers seem determined to pigeonhole her and compare her to every female artist under the sun, which feels like an absolute disservice to me. she is influenced by many different people and they comes out in her music, as it does any artist’s because everybody has their inspirations, but her sound is VERY much her own. as someone who has liked her for years, i can absolutely feel her essence in each song and nobody else’s.

a 10/10 album and such an amazing, promising debut<3

#madison beer #life support #answered #lofihoneymoon

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deus-ex-knoxina · 4 years

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When you added onto your tags and acknowledged that tightlacing is vastly different than corsetry... I'm ace and I think I'm on the aro spectrum but that was extremely hot of you and I think I fell in love

hey i’m on the aro ace spectrum too high five!! and FUCK yes i’m so glad that my strong feelings on making sure everyone knows the difference are appreciated!!!!!!!!!!!! and also you’re giving me this stellar opportunity to talk about it even MORE anon i love you let the infodumping commence

this gets long so the rest is under the cut:

TL;DR: corsets serve the same purpose as a bra, supporting from the hips instead of the shoulders. today, some people wear them for that purpose, and some people wear them as medical devices for scoliosis. if a corset doesn’t fit properly, it’ll be uncomfortable, which is why we hear actors complain about them so much (because they’re not wearing custom-made ones, like they would have, say, a hundred and fifty years ago).

so when everyone was wearing corsets, they had ones that fit them, and corsets HAD to allow women to breathe and move because EVERYONE was wearing them, including working-class women. tightlacing was done by a tiny minority of upper-class women to get the tiniest waist possible, which was fashionable at the time (and still is, if you look at modern waist trainers). and yes, it was damaging to them, but it’s not the intended purpose of a corset. the reason that so many people today think it IS is because of victorian men, who sucked.

(so don’t draw neil josten like a super-rich super-fashionable victorian woman)

(and that was the tl;dr so as you can imagine! what’s under the cut is quite long! BUT IT’S INTERESTING SO I HIGHLY ENCOURAGE U TO READ)

OKAY SO HERE’S THE DEAL. we always hear about corsets as like, women-oppressing torture devices. that’s not true. the *reason* we have all these misconceptions about corsets is the fault of victorian men, just like so many things are the fault of victorian men

the actual purpose of corsets??? like the ACTUAL actual purpose of corsets??? they have literally the same function as a bra. the benefit of a corset is that it supports from the hips and waist, not from the shoulders, so depending on your bust size a corset might be better for you (and for your back)!

and people do still wear corsets today, *not* just people dressing up. like i mentioned above, they’re practical, they’re COMFORTABLE ACTUALLY, and if you have scoliosis then special corsets are sometimes used as medical devices!

so back to them being comfortable. this is another huge-ass misconception. you know who wore corsets Back In The Day? women. not just rich women. middle-class women, working class women, EVERYONE. because it’s underwear. do you think a woman who lives on a farm and has to help with farm things could do that with a super uncomfortable, super tight corset? no.

you can try to lace your corset up as tight as possible, but if you have ANY form of core/abdominal muscles whatsoever, you’re just. not gonna be able to have a wasp waist. you’re just not! you have muscles there that can’t be pushed out of the way!

and are you REALLY gonna put all that effort in to lace it super fucking tight every single day? no. you’re not. because unless you’re super rich, you’re probably having a family member or spouse or maybe a single maid help you get dressed in the morning, and the two of you just don’t have time to turn ‘putting on undergarments’ into a whole fuckin’ production every single day.

but birl, you ask, why is it that movie actresses (such as emma stone and emma watson, literally just off the top of my head) always complain about corsets? simple answer: they’re not fitted well, and the actresses have been inundated with victorian men’s opinions on tightlacing and think that wearing a corset automatically means they’re gonna have their internal organs fucked up. if a corset doesn’t fit you, of course it’s gonna be uncomfortable!!!

and when it comes to movies/tv, whether it actually fits is... not always treated as a primary concern. because they’re doing it for costumes, and since it’s film, the actresses can change out of the corset and wear something else when they’re not filming. if you’re wearing a corset as part of your everyday clothes, you’re GONNA pay for one that’s made specifically for you (not to mention that off-the-rack clothing is a fairly recent invention, and for the vast majority of human history, clothing was made to fit an individual, so OF COURSE women would wear corsets that fit them)

costume corsets are frequently not a functional garment and they don’t need to behave like one. real corsets are, and they have persisted as a functional garment for CENTURIES, which they would *not* have if they were actively harming every single person who wore them. which, if you recall, was... pretty much every single woman. that’s the difference, and also, like i said, there’s an element of fear that also drives those actresses complaining because they have fallen for the victorian male complaining.

(side note: i watched enola holmes recently, and it’s a great movie, but for FUCK’S sake a corset is not a tool of repression any more than a bra is! i know some of y’all like to say that a bra is a tool of repression, because you hardly have any need for one! but a lot of people actually do need breast support SO THEY DON’T DEVELOP BACK PROBLEMS)

now. on to tightlacing, finally. with a normal corset, you lace it tight enough to get support from it, and no tighter, because why the fuck would you want to imprison your lungs and also you probably have core muscles because only a TINY subset of society was rich enough to afford zero abdominal strength.

tightlacing, on the other hand, is what most people think of when they think of a corset. pulling the laces on the back of the corset as TIGHT AS POSSIBLE (sometimes with multiple people pulling) to get a teeny-tiny waist. it severely restricts your lung capacity (since your lungs go all the way down your back), it forces your internal organs to move, and it can deform your ribcage.

additionally, since you can’t breathe very well, you have to breathe into the top of your chest (this is where the whole ‘heaving bosom’ thing comes from), so you can’t really engage in physical activity AND when you take your corset off, you’re likely to faint because of blood rushing everywhere.

and like i have mentioned SEVERAL times, if you have abdominal muscles, it is NOT GONNA WORK. because you can’t push muscle out of the way.

so this can only be done by the superrich, and IT WAS A FAD. i cannot state this enough. it didn’t last, because it fucked people up! and the fact that it wasn’t healthy, combined with some good old victorian misogyny, meant that victorian men were talking about tightlacing CONSTANTLY. and since normal corsets had been around for forever, nobody was talking about them because everyone knew how corsets were supposed to work!

which means, of course, that if you look at, say, victorian sources discussing corsets, they’re gonna be talking about tightlacing, and if you don’t live in a time where the VAST majority of women are wearing corsets, then you might not know that tightlacing is this weird fad among super-wealthy women and assume that it’s what everyone was doing!

now here’s the thing. we have bras now. we also have modern corsets. guess what? we also have modern tightlacing. those are waist trainers. now, i don’t know as much about them as i do about corsets, but i imagine they at least pretend to be better for you than tightlacing. don’t fall for it. being able to breathe is sexy.

AND if you’re interested in this, bernadette banner and karolina zebrowska have some great youtube videos on it! i actually don’t remember off the top of my head if bernadette banner has a video dedicated to corsets but she does talk about them when analyzing terrible ‘historical’ movie costumes

another side note: so what sparked this initially was talking about the aftg fandom and how neil josten is frequently represented in art as having a tiny waist. having made it to the bottom of this post, i hope u now have an ARSENAL of facts with which to know with 100% certainty that it is impossible for neil josten to have a wasp waist. the guy’s a d1 athlete.

and even if it’s some kind of AU, if he runs as much as he does in canon, no wasp waist. he has abdominal muscles. and body fat, because he is not a bodybuilder and he NEEDS body fat. i get that he’s short???? but he’s not a twink. he’s a future pro athlete. so even if he tightlaced a corset, he would STILL not have a tiny waist. it’s physically impossible for him.

the end!

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