#i'm still on part 4 bc if i go any further my heart is going to be ripped from my chest and be stomped on and i'm mentally not ready yet

[yuzuppoii]

ok but jotaro as an adult thou 😊

#just art #jojo's bizarre adventure #jojo part 4 #jojo's bizarre adventure part 4 #diamond is unbreakable #diamond is not crash #jotaro #jotaro kujo #kujo jotaro #i'm still on part 4 bc if i go any further my heart is going to be ripped from my chest and be stomped on and i'm mentally not ready yet

[sweetdreamspootypie]

🙃

I'm flying out tomorrow

Had a good night tonight

But

Vent / processing / just capturing some of the stuff I've been thinking about

It's so strange how different my worldview is because I'm a Covid nurse

Or maybe everyone else is insane

Who is to say

TW car accident, child injury

Managed to go see the last set of cousins tonight

My aunt was like

" oh yeah last few days I've been really sick

Had a really bad flu

Still coughing actually

But we don't believe in taking to our beds for just a flu lol"

And my cousin mentioned she doesn't know when the last time she took a RAT test was. Didn't even recognize the name. Said "oh yeah that's kind of outdated"

And NOBODY I've talked to has even been aware that there are still Covid booster vaccines happening and relevant?

They only ever had the initial course of 3 or 4 and then stopped? Didn't even know that further boosters are a thing at all?

and cousin told me that you don't take time off work for Covid here because it's not considered life threatening anymore

What the fuck is wrong with england

Why would you invite guests over if you actively have the flu?

Fuck man

Like it was actually a pretty good evening and it will probably be fine

But it's just so weird seeing the increasing divide in basic values

Like yeah I value hard work and discipline and etc etc and I want to get better at it

But how do these people value self care so little?

Idk I'm just hyper aware of it as well bc of my family's thing with chronic fatigue syndrome and how precarious wellbeing is

But also stuff like

Hard work is "being responsible" because idk doing your part at work on the project or whatever

But in my line of work

If I don't rest

If I don't eat or take my breaks or I haven't been sleeping well or burn out

Then I cannot provide the healthcare to others that is needed

I've got such vivid visceral memories of standing there as I'm realizing I need to hit the medical emergency big red button, at times when I'm over tired and not feeling my best self

Feeling my words and thoughts running like treacle and just being so aware of oh shit I'm not actually up for being responsible for this right now actually

And when I'm in that state and the adrenaline hits, it just makes it worse

I can feel my heart pounding in my ears and my dehydration headache and having to muster ok I have to be reassuring and communicative and make sure I'm dexterous enough to manage a complex situation

And if I can't manage it, people get hurt

And there's a very real risk that someone gets closer to death than they needed to, or would have if I had been on the ball and my best self

The other day, on Monday

I had a coffee at 12 noon

It was a really nice rich mocha from a chocolate specialist

I'm not accustomed to caffeine any more these days, so I was awake until 4am Monday night

On Tuesday night, despite being tired, I was also awake til 3am because of the disturbance to my sleep schedule it caused

On Wednesday, I was feeling gross from the sleep disturbance. I went to my room and tried to take an afternoon nap

At 4pm on Wednesday, there was a car accident outside of our house. A car hit a 3 year old child crossing the road with his mother.

My dad came to get me because I'm a nurse and that's my job.

When he came in I was in a groggy half asleep haze

I had my shoes on and was out the door but was still carrying a head of groggy haze

The kid was fine

Someone else was checking him out, asking all the right questions

And within a couple of minutes an ambulance arrived, and got to do a further assessment

It looked like the child had a bit of a bumped knee, probably from where he fell, but was otherwise just fine

Mum with him was being a champion at visibly keeping it together until tonight after the kids are put to bed, when she'll fall apart

I was able to be there to see that it was under control and looked on until the ambulance arrived

But I was so aware that I wouldn't able to clearly speak. Wouldn't be able to project calming competence with even just the simple fact of introducing myself as a health worker available if needed

Everything was fine

But if it hadn't been

I would not have been able to fulfil my role

Because I hadn't taken proper care of myself

I'm going to remember my guilt over one badly planned coffee I had on Monday, for years

Because my job is to be the one who knows how to make it alright when everything is wrong

Why the fuck can't other people do the simple things like isolate if sick

And not expose illness to people going back to the home of their 89 year old grandmother

I don't want to live to work

I want to live well

And wellness and happiness are important values and resources

And not contradictory with working hard to make progress on goals

People need to learn to rest

I didn't realize how bad it was

#My posts #My life #Vent #Plagueblogging #Processing #Using Tumblr as a diary #It would be fine but bc I'm already feeling ick from the sleep loss #I don't know #I have been helpful with Dadi's foot wound though #Which feels good #Just being able to be an educated opinion #Tw car accident #Cw child injury #Kid is fine

[cookies-over-yonder]

cookies you've given me too much power by giving me any kind of opening to talk about Glenns gender . let me just say you've brought this upon yourself .

gonna word salad in your ask box about Glenn close <3 also just realized you haven't seen the post I made a bit ago about Glenn being transmasc and amab so I can go over that shit again >:] OK ! so !! in my silly little headcannon , Glenn is amab , but also spends every second of his gay little life fucking with gender . I think in like . his late teens-20s he went by she/her and she was super feminine and she absolutely loved every second of it . I don't think she got any surgeries , but she definitely went on estrogen and I think she probably stays on it even after "detransitioning" . but I think then probably in her later 20s/early 30s she realized she was more of a gnc guy than a girl at that point . so in my oh so humble opinion , bringing my beloved wife Morgan into this , Morgan is a lesbian , please and thank you , no I am not taking further questions (I absolutely am please send me Morgan questions I'm begging you) anyways , so personally I think Glenn was probably fem the entire time her and Morgan were together , i also have many thoughts about Morgan's gender , but were not talking abt her rn <3 anyways ! Glenn ! so methinks that around the time when Nick was born glenn was starting to lean more into the nonbinary side , probably using she/they while Nick was like . 1-4 ish ? and then after that it was they/them for a few years and then after Morgan's death they kinda just ... gave up and decided they didn't need to be bothering so much with gender , he needed to be a good father to his kid . one thing about me is I love thinking about Glenn close , the og repressive guy <3 I think after Morgan's death Glenn didn't really notice all the small joys he dropped because of that . he tried to swipe it all under the rug of just things that happen and obviously it has nothing to do with his spouse's death no-siree :D anyways , after Morgan's death Glenn didnt really let themself find joy in many things . he decided he needed to start becoming at least a little bit more of a "normal parent" . he stopped being comfortable expressing the more feminine parts of themself and it absolutely did not help her through morgans death . methinks Morgan was a lot of the reason Glenn was comfortable experimenting with their gender , and now that she's gone , their feminity just reminds him of her , and as Glenn does , she immediately tries to distance himself as far as possible instead of actually dealing with things <3 I do still think glenn stayed on estrogen bcs they were afraid of change (or at least that's what she tells herself) , and also keeps his hair long . bcs of the rocker vibes (no it's bcs of the transgender spotlight aimed at her constantly) but doesn't really allow themself to dress super feminine , cause they're a dude . honestly . for real . 100% a guy . no girl here . but also . sometimes someone will just see them from the back and ask "ma'am?" and Glenn feels her heart skip a beat bcs *yeah that's me I'm maam* but then instinctively stamps it down with a "nah, but dont worry about it , its chill" i think it probably takes glenn a really long time to be comfortable honestly expressing themself again , but I think eventually she does . it's probably when he gets back with Morgan tho , seeing her again and even before they actually get together honestly . I think they were probably just friends for a while when Morgan was still with Jodie , but even being around her made Glenn more comfortable being herself again <3 Glenn is a very genderqueer to me , I think once they're comfortable wirh themselves again they use all pronouns , but traditionally feminine terms still give them that little jolt of euphoria , even if she's still fine and comfortable with other pronouns as well . there's just nothing to him like wearing a dress and being called pretty , that's all <3

ok i could probably keep going but also my thumbs are tired so that's all for rn , anyways <3 hope you enjoy my silly Glenn rant <3 I love her so much <333

i love this so much!! also i will gladly give you all the power you so desire because i adore reading your rambles!! i'm sorry my response isn't as juicy as this entire ask because i've got a bit of a headache coming on but i want you to know that i really do love your interpretation of glenn's gender ♡

#glenn close dndads #glenn close #aether's rambles <3 #ask

[macaronnya]

Fresh(?) Impressions (13)

Other parts: |Trickstar| |UNDEAD| |2wink| |Ra*bits| |Akatsuki| |fine| |Ryuseitai| |Knights| |Valkyrie| |Switch| |MaM/Double Face/Crazy:B| |Eden| |Alkaloid|

----------------------------------------------

Hello Enstarries~☆ Finally, the last part is here! Since Alkaloid is special in the sense that it's the main focus for the first 3 chapters in this game, I decided to also read the first chapter in addition to their Episode 1. And god did it take a long time to finish it. It makes sense for the main story to have each episode last long but the pacing is also quite slow. At least, to what I'm used to.

DISCLAIMER!: Everything said here is for entertainment purposes only and not meant to attack anyone. This is not an accurate description of any characters but my subjective rambling for fun, so please don't take it too seriously. (Just to be safe, I'm kinda scared of elite idol fans) Also, you will hear me mention other games a bunch of times bc I'm that bad and uncreative at explaining and I'm still grieving A3!EN's shutdown. Eng is my 2nd (or 3rd?) language so there might be some weird grammar or spelling mistakes. And I write at 3 am usually.

Without further ado....Let's Ensemble!☆

Hmmmmmm Alkaloid.....a unit compromised of "underachievers". Forced to comply to the higher ups like how card soldiers have to obey the Queen of Hearts. Well, I still don't know what exactly the theme is but the aesthetic is kinda cool Ig. I like their outfits. The colors go well together and the little differentiations aka the pips (and shoes too, but those are not that important) are a smart detail here, since there are 4 members for 4 symbols! And it's nice you can see them on their gloves & jacket as buttons and medals. Although the silhouette is pretty simple, it doesn't look boring at all through such details and and other things. I like the hats very much! Now, their songs are not really my thing, at first. They don't sound boring but I needed a bit of time to warm up to them. I'm not sure if it's just my lack of cultureness but it gives me strong Vocaloid vibes. And yes, I know Vocaloid is just j-pop and alt but that's just what came first to me. That goes especially for Distorted Heart and Believe 4 leaves, though I admit I haven't listened to them as much as others (similiar situation as 2wink). I kinda thought they were rivals or smth like that to Trickstar at first when I went through the whole enstars playlist and also saw comments saying they prefer Alkaloid as protags in contrast to Trickstar. All in all, I don't have a strong opinion on them yet but they get a pass 👍

6/10 - pretty alright I suppose

Hiiro Amagi

Man Idek what to say. He really just went "I'm gonna destroy a whole part of the entertainment industry bc my bro won't come home." And to think I thought he was just a normal guy.... I'm having a bit of a hard time describing him tbh. He's friendly, eager to learn new things, very optimistic, vvveeeerrrryyyy keen on getting along with everyone but switches tunes immediately the moment he disapproves of them, is pretty perceptive of potential danger or in serious situations and stubborn. His lack of common sense and him just thinking every new thing is a city thing & his bluntness is a funny running gag. Dude has no idea what a smartphone is, how did he even get recruited as an idol and make a resumé??? Spade fits him, since one popular speculation is that it represents knights and he's good at fighting and athletic stuff I'd say. That and he is the leader of the card soldiers (if that really is the theme). Smth about the clash of clear blue eyes and strong red hair and his hairstyle makes him pretty dashing.

6/10 - a pinch of psycho but he'd make a great neighbour

Aira Shiratori

His I love~ is kinda annoying, though it's kinda neat as a catchphrase bc it sounds like his name Aira. I wonder whether he cane up with that before or after starting his idol career 🤔 His obsession with idols is also slightly worrisome but at least he's relatively respectful (to the idols). He's average in the sense, that nothing stands out to me except those things. I got used to his voice eventually but it did remind me of a squeaking duck toy at first, in a bad way. I guess he's the heart bc I love~ and how he's just the most expressive emotionally? At least, you can read him the most easily out of the four. Although, clover would fit him more bc that's supposed to represent the commoners.

5/10 - he'd spam fancams on twitter

Mayoi Ayase

Mans was on the ceiling for the whole meeting and nobody blinked twice. If that doesn't tell you what you need to know about the cast already.... Anyways, I love his hair color so much! A strong purple for a strong personality! Everything about him leaves a strong impression but ironically, he's very shy. Or rather incredibly self-depricating for some reason. He's like Muku (A3!) but cranked up. Breath in the same room as him and he'll apologize. His sprite (the right one there) first made me think he's some unhinged crazy dude and, I mean, he's not but his Ep.1 did feel like a thriller. He's pure-hearted but he sure makes it hard to believe. Surprisingly, he has a powerful singing voice and I'd say the best in Alkaloid. He REALLY went off in Believe 4 leaves, which is such a banger btw. I heard he chomps people and all I can say is ouch with those teeth.....He's clover, which....I guess is OK. He seems more like a deadly shy spy or introverted eccentric alchemist than a normal commoner but I mean nothing speaks against it.

7/10 - he needs to work on his choice of words but I guess he's a cinnamon roll?????

Tatsumi Kazehaya

Who thought of adding a christian into the idol rooster??? So now we have son of a family tending to a temple and one tending to a church. Well, he's a chill and responsible guy. Kinda curious whether he's catholic or a protestant. My limited knowledge of taking (protestant) christian studies instead of ethics in school is finally coming to use!/jk (not a christian here but in school in Germany, you usually have to choose between christian or ethic studies and protestant christian studies usually had the more chill teachers so yeah). I'm slightly surprised by how often he mentions things of the bible in the correct context (I think). Makes me think the authors properly researched their stuff but who knows, not me that's for sure. Anyways, the way he speaks and sounds reminds me of lying on fresh soft green grass swaying in gentle wind. Actually, he reminds me awfully a lot of Libra (FE: Awakening) with how he's not to be taken easy just bc he has a gentle personality. Kinda sudden but I wanna kiss his beauty marks. I predict he's gonna consider stopping his idol activites due to his worsening injuries but the power of friendship somehow heals him. Diamond doesn't fit him much since that represents nobles and merchants. Hearts actually represent clergy, which is a missed opportunity but oh well.

7/10 - I'm gonna stick my hand in the fire and say he's the sort of christian who doesn't use religion as an excuse to oppress 80% of the human population but to make the world a better place

----------------------------------------------

Conclusion

So uhm. Cool group I suppose. I'll get to know them better after reading the main story but for now I don't have a strong opinion on them. I'm surprised to like the the christian guy and the ceiling guy so much. Especially Mayoi with his screen time of not even a 4th of the chapter lol.

----------------------------------------------

Afterwords!

After more than a month, I finally managed to read all unit stories and can at last begin reading the "!" and after that the "!!" main story. Only took me until the 4th event in the EN server.......

I have to say, there's solid worldbuilding and it's not all just happy idol stuff, which is pretty neat. That is more or less the norm for most idol games these days and I'm not saying that we need to have brutally serious real life stories but what stands out is that the characters feel.....more 3 dimensional Ig? Like, there are stereotypes of the cute baby one or the outgoing flirt but they're not just that. They have realistic worries that come from working in the idol industry, have other characteristics not exactly befitting that archetype or difficult relationship dynamics bc they're people. They can have real problematic flaws that aren't just "Oh I'm soooo clumsy ><" or "I'm such a glutton hehe" but that's just what I've heard so far, meaning that's not really a complete plus point yet. The mix of this and the wackiness of everything else makes it very interesting so far. (Just like A3! 🥲) Or maybe I just haven't played enough games and am just overrestimating an older franchise.

The music is really good as well. I feel like in idol franchises, the intrumental is often only there to support the singing but here it's actually doing more!!! Like, the instruments compliment the singing and have many layers on their own. I like following different instruments each time I listen to a song for the nth time and see in what way it enriches the song. I guess the fever time or whatever it's called highlights it. The wide range of genres and styles is also a big bonus. And just to say it here bc I can't do it anywhere else: the shuffle unit songs are godly. Not a single miss yet. Noir Neige and Moonlight Disco are the best! For the unit collabs, pretty much half of them are really hitting the spot. The rest is meh. The cover series is H I L A R I O U S and cool if nothing else.

Maybe I'll do a comparison in the future with how I'm feeling about everyone then and my past impressions. But for now, this is the end! If you have anything you wanna share or say, just keep in mind all is for fun and we're here for a good time ^^. Until we meet again~☆

#ensemble stars #enstars #Alkaloid #macaron rambles #it's past 12 am here but maybe somewhere in the world the week hasn't passed yet... #at least it's not at 3am yet #editing took so long...

[lonely--seeker]

Gave myself the task to rank the strawhats from my fav to the less favs, because honestly they're all faves.

Trying to put aside any thirst i have that is, I'll try to rank them in order of how much they make me feel. So watch out for the rant.

#1 Sanji

To nobody's surprise, we kin him ofc we do, I love him, i hate him, and i wouldn't have it any other way. It never fails to amaze me the fact that he is one of the strongest in the crew yet he knows what it feels like to be the weakest, and he is also one of the kindest people around at the same time he knows not everyone should be deserving of such kindness. Pretty much checks all my likes and single handed added a bunch of them!

#2 Luffy

Now he would be #1 if Sanji wasn't so emotionally rooted in me, I can't even start to explain Luffy is the best character to ever exist and i would die for him, he's both the kind of friend i wish I had and the one i wish I could be. Looking at him an make me feel better in a heartbeat.

#3 Brook.

I just can't… Not cry everytime I watch the scene in which he explains his past and just breaks… "I'm so glad to be alive!" It gives me goosebumps. it's a simple yet powerful sentence and i keep repeating it on my head "I'm so glad to be alive, I'm so glad to be alive…" That's right... In the end he ended up meeting the Strawhats, I- the fact he is very joyfull most of the time, and the little quirky things he does make me feel that's his way of coping and it breaks my heart further… Really this shouldn't be allowed, but i will root for this man to keep enjoying his life… although he's already dead!?

#4 Usopp

Oh boy, he is perhaps the second most human to me after Sanji. And he doesn't gets the recognition he deserves for being SO brave, i would like to have the balls to sail on a ship headed for a path full of danger that most probably would end in death and just for the sake of following your dream and having adventures? Having to bear the burden of feeling helpless because you're not strong enough? This bad boy can fit so much insecurities inside him. Anyways his growth hasn't been so flashy, but we love him exactly for the way he is and the long way he has come ^^ with my whole heart.

#5 Robin

Probably noticed my uhm… tendency for tragic pasts uh, but yeah the "I want to live" made me cry an amount i never thought i could, girl you deserve so much to be happy, you literally did nothing wrong and everyone who hurt you shall burn in hell forever. She would be higher considering it's a more brutal and lonely past, but honestly i like to think she got closure overall, i don't know… i still love her an insane amount.

# 6 Zoro

I LOVE Zoro, from his simplicity, to his bluntness to his oh so strong will of becoming stronger to his tiddies i wish I was more like him… not, not the tiddies part but working hard everyday for my dreams, i also love the gender equality that he has going on in his single braincell head, overall a character full of strong meaning but that easily stumbles on his way and that kinda bothers me… My feelings towards him are mostly bc he Is enjoyable, and feels like a friend that would never judge me so yeah, emotional support Marimo, come get yours.

#7 Franky

He gives me cool dad/Uncle vibes and i live for that, he is a dork, enjoyable and yeah quirky but he is such a nice guy sometimes! Like for real i live for the dad vibes this man gives, his history is really good too, the topic about weapons is very interesting but it also feels left behind and didn't struck me directly in a soft nerve like the others, i would love to see more of him!

#8 Chopper

Now I've been kind of being annoyed by chopper somehow lately, but his arc was also a big emotional wrecker to me, i cry everytime I CRY ALWAYS...i am crying…. So i give him that, i liked him way better pre timeskip, and i get he is the youngest but he could grow up a little bit.

#9 Nami

I would love to rank her higher but i just can't, actually i feel she should be lowest but… I really want to like her, i really would like her to be my favourite, really, but sometimes she just doesn't clicks with me even with how great she is, and much as chopper i think she's been kind of left out of growth? But not in a way she feels flat, she just feels left behind </3

#10 Jimbe

I like him, yes, but i still haven't found my exact feelings for him, i need to get to know him better maybe? He looks very nice and gentle, squishy…. Friend shaped… dad fish… Being honest his history didn't caught my attention, although the whole story of the Gyojin island is ;; simply amaizing ;; there's nothing that's specifically from him that i can pinpoint rn, I just really wanna see him around the Strawhats tho, watch him put up with his antics

#me blabbering #i could go into heavy detail abt most of them #and i feel like they deserve it #but i wont right now #one piece

[quirkdotcom]

Hey everyone !! I am super excited to post this as part of a collab with my fellow members of BNHA Sanctuary! The prompt was " _____ is concerned bc (y/n) isn't sleeping." I chose Izuku Midoriya as my character because he needs a little more love ! So I hope everyone enjoys! Don't forget to check out the other collab writers fics too !!

×××××××××××××××

Technically, Midoriya wasn't supposed to have anyone over in his dorm, even in college he had tried to follow that rule knowing that if he didn't, Iida would probably find out and scold him, but as he flipped over and looked just above your shoulder, his All Might themed alarm clock read out "4:12AM" with red numbers, and he gave a small sigh.

Tonight was one of the first nights that you had been able to sleep before 5am, but the reason was unknown. Midoriya had asked you plenty of times, each time you resulted in you shaking your head vigorously and eyes watering until he just hugged you tightly, saying that you would find another time to talk about it. 

Slowly, scooted closer to you, wrapping an arm around your side, pulling you closer to him.  

The movement, which Izuku had thought he was being slow with, actually woke you up. You blinked a few times before turning and nuzzling into his chest, quietly mumbling, "Are you awake Izu?"

"I'm definitely sleeping…are you awake (Y/n)?" 

You hummed, starting to wake up more now, "A little bit," Yet despite your words, you didn't make any effort to move, "What time is it?"

"4:14 in the morning," he responded, pulling back a little so he could look at you

Slowly you sat up, pulling yourself free from his grasp, suddenly wide awake. 

"Baby?" He sat up next, eyeing you slightly as growing concern seeped in. 

You looked back to him, offering up a smile, "Don't worry Izu, I'm still tired enough to sleep," 

He seemed to relax some, the tension slowly leaving his body, "I'm glad then, because I think it's too early to get up for the day, and that's coming from me of all people,"  he then proceeded to lay back down, hugging the comforter to his chest

You laughed lightly, then paused, letting out a heavy breath, "Hey Izuku, I owe you an explanation, I shouldn't make you worry all the time and have to have me over in your dorm like this," 

Again, he sat up, scooting closer to where you were sitting, "Whatever the reason is, I'd be happy to help you over and over again, okay?" 

You nodded, leaning against him, glad to have that reassurance of support. 

"Well...my quirk has some nasty side effects…" You paused, closing your eyes and allowing the shadow like mass begin to rise from your body. 

It was a lot like Tokoyami's dark shadow in the sense that it was almost another being but attached to you. It could take a multitude of shapes, and most items couldn't pass through it, rather instead would get stuck to it. 

Most of the time you used it to create a large beast of sorts, and it only grew stronger from the fear or unease of your opponents. 

However it's main and personal drawback was arguably the worst. 

"When I don't use my quirk enough, it turns on me in my dreams…well nightmares. The Mass as I call it, separates from me and chases me down. In the end it envelops me and...well I start to suffocate. So I've been staying up late to try and put off the dreams as long as I can," 

In the dark of the room, your quirk was even more unsettling. It looked to be wriggling around, crawling amongst the edges of the room. But the one area it wouldn't go near, was the spot where Midoriya sat. 

Instinctively he wrapped his arms around you, feeling your trembles.  He thought for some time about what you had said until finally, he knew what the root of this issue was. 

"(Y/n) my love, don't let it feed off you," 

You turned at his comment, looking up to him, his oddly calm demeanor throwing you off guard. Normally, most people tended to draw back from you and your quirk, but Midoriya never did.  

"You said that your quirk grows stronger when people are scared or uneasy, and I think that it applies to you as well. It's easily taken over the whole room by now. " 

As you looked to the room, watching as the Mass would slink around the room, at times catching a ray of moonlight, seemingly drowning the light in itself. 

The longer you looked, the more it started to grow, your heart raced, you couldn't find a spot for your eyes to stop, they just kept looking. No one spot in the room was safe from it's grasp. 

Before you could fall further into its depths, two arms circled around your waist, pulling you close, "(Y/n)...you're safe…" 

All at once, the mass receded, leaving the room as it was before. 

With that, you laid down, pulling Izuku with you. While you didn't fall asleep very fast, you still knew that you'd be able to come back tomorrow to try again. 

And you did. You continued to do so for about a week, every night repeating as it had been the first night of that week. 

You still got hardly any sleep, and were starting to fall behind in both your classes and your training. In fact, there would be times where he would catch you fighting the urge to doze off while just hanging out with friends. 

Midoriya found himself asking for the help of your best and closest friend.

"Hey, Tanako, can I ask you something?" 

The water vortex hero-in-training looked up, as she was currently focusing on a book, "First, Midoriya, you can call me by my first name by now, but what's up?" 

"Ah sorry Katsumi…" he gave a sheepish smile and took a seat across from the brunette, "You know how (Y/n) stays up all the time? I've been trying to help them but...nothing is working," 

Katsumi dog eared a corner to her book, closing it as she hummed, "Well, when we were younger, we used to sleep in forts, and had lights strung up so that it wasn't so dark," she met brown eyes to his green ones, "I'm not sure if it would work now...but I think it's worth a shot. " 

Izuku nodded, standing back up, "I'll need to get some lights then..and figure out a good setup for a fort, Thanks Katsumi ! Have fun reading!" 

He started to walk away but didn't get too far before your friend called back out to him.

"Oh and Midoriya, thank you. We've all gotten pretty worried for (Y/n)," 

He nodded, turning back and going over his plan in his head. 

His first stop would be the store, finding some fairy  lights to hang up. He also decided to buy a few extra blankets, and another pillow. 

With that being done, he headed back to the university dorms, making his way to his own and luckily for him, he had some time before you were supposed to come over. 

He started to move things around, pulling the bed over towards the window, and his desk to the other wall. From there, Izuku started to round up all his extra blankets, grabbing extra tacks to hold them up. 

What took up the most of his time was the fact that he couldn't settle on a good way to have the blankets and the overall shape of the fort, after all he only had so much room to work with. 

In fact, he was still working on putting up the blankets by the time you had let yourself into his dorm. 

"Uh..Izuku?"

Midoriya jumped lightly, and turned around to face you, a blush spreading across his face as he realized he had been caught, "Uh..surprise?" 

You took a moment to look around his dorm, noticing the changes in where your bed was, and where he was currently sitting, blankets in hand. 

"Are you...building a fort?" 

Despite all the evidence you had already seen, he quickly glanced around and hid the blanket behind his back, smiling embarrassedly, "I uh...I was..I mean yeah but…" 

But to his surprise, you barked out a laugh, letting your bag slide off your shoulders and to the floor as you made your way over to him, "That's cute ! Let me help!" 

And so, together you both figured out the best set up, easily hanging up the blankets and lights, then using the rest of the blankets to create a comfy space on the floor underneath the fort. Midoriya pulled out his laptop, playing your favorite movie and starting it as you grabbed a few snacks. 

Once fully settled in, he wrapped his arms around you, and let you rest your head against his body. 

In his arms was perhaps the safest spot for you to be. He was warm, comfortable and you knew that you wouldn't have any troubles as long as he held onto you. In fact, you could hardly keep your eyes open in the moment. 

Within the next ten minutes you fell fast asleep. Izuku flicked his eyes to the clock in the corner of his laptop, smiling as he read that it was only around 9:38pm. H3 let out a small and content sigh, holding you a little tighter and closed his own eyes, getting ready to sleep, letting the movie play out in the background.

"I love you, (Y/n)..." he murmured, though you couldn't hear him, he was sure that you knew...and you did. 

#boku no hero academia #my hero academia #boku no hero academia x reader #my hero academia x reader #bnha #bnha izuku #izuku mydoria #midoriya izuku #mha izuku #midoriya x y/n #Midorya x reader #Izuku x reader #deku #mha deku #bnha deku #deku x reader

[colour-outside-the-liness]

Oh wow, you two have been friends for a long time then! I know what's that like, I've known my best friend who lives in Spain since we were 8! Definitely awesome to have someone like that in your life. Are you still going to be roommates when the baby comes? And that was really thoughtful of your ex making sure you didn't travel alone.

Canada is really cold tho, so if you're okay with that you should def move there! Ah well, I'm doing better now so that's what matters, all the horrible worries I had when I lived back home are gone atm.

Yeah, that's the spirit! you can do all US states even if it takes you 43 years, that's plenty of time! hahaha And your welcome, it's one of my favourite fics.

Your mind is great, don't worry. At least something good came out of it haha.

Oh so people make her a pisces then, I see. I've met a pisces who was kinda like Dani once so that's why I said she has that kind of energy, but she def has fire on her chart too. And yeah I can see some virgo traits in her, but she's very sensitive and a bit naive so I guess pisces makes more sense.

I had to look up what a badger was hahaha never heard of them before.

I'm sorry you had to go through that. Sounds scary. And you still have to take medication bc of it. The threat of catching covid must've made that 10x worse too. And I can only hope to learn from my mistakes at the very least.

People who made thobm are fucking savages tbh hahaha. 😂 Kinda wish they had cast Oliver as Jamie like they originally intended but then we wouldn't have our damie... don't know what's worse honestly.

Oh Yorkshire accent is pretty cool too, isn't the lead singer of the Arctic Monkeys from Yorkshire? Honestly think all the language variations and different accents that come with each region are really fascinating. And that happens with all languages, not just English. Wish I could speak all languages in the world, that would be a cool superpower! I guess it makes sense you like American accents more bc it's so different from yours. I've become desensitized to North American accents just bc I hear them all the time, but I see how it would be more appealing to you.

Oooh I love that possibility of it becoming a real fic soon hahaha. Worst part of letting it cook is that I already have the finished illustration in my head but the transferring to reality part is not working rn. Wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy tbh.

You def had a busy weekend and start of the week! I have a virgo in my life rn too I know the struggle. Her birthday is this weekend in fact. I had an okay weekend thank you! Managed to catch up with that pirate AU you recommended and I'm already planning fanart for it that will probably never see the light of day haha! Are we going to have more smut this next MoU update? (need to know for scientific purposes 🔬)

Yeah we've been friends for years we met when we were 14 and are still friends now at 27 so it's been one of my longest friendships I have a friend that I met at 4 but we're not as close as we once were still really good friends but not best friends haha!! aww that's so cool that you guys have been friends for that long!! Yeah we're still gonna live together when the baby comes- we're looking for a bigger place right now to make room for the baby and her boyfriend (he still doesn't live with us yet but will soon.... *insert gif of Monica Gellar one friends saying "And now I have to live with a boy" while crying* Yeah my ex is a super thoughtful person and she just didn't want me travelling so far alone when I had never flown before because when I went to Paris with my college we drove there and went on the Eurostar and it took us 13 hours to get there but I had never flown before going to LA and I picked an 11 hour flight for my first one so she wanted someone to fly with me she's a very thoughtful person I LOVE the cold weather I am so sad right now because it's bene quite warm in the north of England I can't wait until it's like -3 degrees Celsius during the winter nights again so I am sure I would love Canada I am fine with it taking me 43 years if that's what it takes haha I just wanna hit all 50 states I think it would be so fun to do it and to be able to say I'd done it.  Haha thank you!! As long as something good comes out of it that's all I can hope for but there are times I've done things and people are like "And you're allowed to teach kids?" Like I can be really dumb sometimes haha.  Yeah I've seen a couple of fics where she has been a pisces I think with it never being said and with VP never saying what she thinks she is people have looked at her personality and matched it up to zodiac signs- a lot of the pisces I've met haven't been like Dani like I said but I do trust what people who know more about zodiac signs say because I know nothing and I just pick a random date each time so CBML she's a Leo and MoU she's a virgo and in SLS she's gonna be a Scorpio because that's just how I've done it haha but I really know nothing about zodiac signs other than what you have told me!! There different types of badgers there are honey badgers and they're more in America here we have a different type of badger and they look so cute but they are really vicious if they feel attacked or scared so try snd avoid badgers... more than that though we just have cows, geese, ducks, swans... lots of foxes but noting dangerous like bears or anything its a very boring place to live!! Yeah it is pretty scary but I just take everything one day at a time- I actually caught Covid last year because of how much time I was in the hospital having treatments for my condition I caught Covid and ended up in the hospital for a week while they had to give me loads of medication and blood transfusions and had to put me on a fluid drip because I was really dehydrated and that was really scary but luckily I was okay and now I am fully vaccinated so hopefully I won't catch it again. I think you will definitely learn from your mistakes I feel like some mistakes have to be made in life so you can grow from them Oh they were definitely savage but I love Bly Manor so much and I will watch it so many more times I can't wait for it to come out on DVD!! Like it was heart breaking but so beautiful and we got such an incredible wlw relationship from it and some great representation and I love that!! Would be interesting to see how it would've affected people had Oliver played Jamie though Yeah Alex Turner is from Sheffield which is South Yorkshire so again we have a similar accent but it's different because I am from further North but there are things that we say in a similar way because we’re from Yorkshire just different parts of Yorkshire... there are four Yorkshires: North, East, West, and South haha and all are in the north of England  Yeah I think that’s the case every where I think accents and languages are so interesting and I would love to be able to speak any other language but I only speak English in my school it wasn’t seen as being overly important to learn a language and I have tried learning them since leaving school but I struggle now  There are some American accents I love (Southern and Midwestern) so when I heard Dani speak I was like 😍🥵🥰 because I love that type of accent I have become desensitised to some American accents that are just standard ones from watching so many movies and TV shows but there are some accents that just make me do heart eyes haha  I am hoping it can become a real fic soon but I am struggling with some stuff but keeping hopeful with it!! Awwh no I’m sorry it’s so hard for you I hope it gets better soon that you’re able to get it onto a page!!  I have had such a busy weekend and part of the week had a bit of a busy day today too and looking after my niece again tomorrow not rest for me it would seem but it’s fine I don’t mind keeping busy!! Well happy birthday to her I hope she has a great day!!  Oh yay I’m glad had an okay weekend and that you were able to catch up on the pirate AU and that you already have fan art planned for it- even if no one ever sees that fanart!! No there is no smut in this chapter of MoU some implied smut but no actual smut- there will probably be smut in chapter 9 though because y’know... it’s me haha 😂 

#lib3rtin33

[genderfluidfuckernamedfox]

He's not on here so fuck it.

There are about 4 people in this world that I would do anything for. So imagine my shock when one of them stabs me in the back. He basically attacked who I am as a person and accused me of several things that I would just NEVER do to anyone. I've been grieving the death of our friendship and at this point I keep bouncing from anger to depression. I know that he's projecting his insecurities onto me and I shouldn't take it seriously but my heart is still broken because of this situation.

A little back story: My friend(who I've known since 8th grade) had just dropped out of college to take a semester off and figure out what he wants to do with his life.(good for him tbh, I hope he finds something he's happy with) I've been sick since school started but he still wanted to hang out with me and I said I would help him move his stuff from his dorm into his new place.(which is his grandma's house, he lives with her) So we drives 2 hours to his college, meet his friends and have a nice time, load up all of his stuff and then head on back home. It was a fun trip and I loved seeing his friends. Now every year or so we would talk about how we would be a good couple. He tells me that he wants to be in a poly relationship with me and another friend.(this friend currently has a gf he's living with) So my friend had the full intention to "homewreck", as he put it, this dude and date him along side me. I was like alright, I was cool with it bc we'd all been friends for a really long time. I however do not wanna date 2 dudes(I like chicks way more). I think one of the main reasons he wanted to date both me and our friend was because he also wanted to eventually rent a place with both of us. Which again I wouldn't mind doing in the future but I currently have a three year old brother and a seven year old sister that I help take care of and I don't plan on leaving them until my little bro is in school.

So dating... I really like relationships, but they don't like me. I'm very excited that he's giving me any type of romantic attention. However I'm also in beauty school and have 8am classes everyday so hanging out with him every night for a little over a week is getting exhausting; but I care about him so I'm going to make time for him if he really wants to see me. One day we hang out with another friend of ours that I haven't seen since highschool. Jasper is his name, we go over to jasper's house to play some board games and just chill out, he's also got like 5 dogs so we eventually go on a night walk with one of the pups. I'm so damn tired at this point, it's the end of the week and I've currently been sick for 2 weeks. I notice that my friend seems a little off but hell, I'M a little off so I don't pay much attention to him (which is very unlike me, I'm usually the one that makes sure everyone feels included) if he really feels excluded he would just assert himself into the situation right? We've all been friends since highschool so it shouldn't be a problem right? Wrong. I finally get a day with just myself and my family and he sends me this text

So after being up my ass for an entire week he's going to say all of this shit about me and act like I've been an ass this whole time we were hanging out.

He said he wanted to date me and then broke up with me before we even dated.

He thinks I'm copying him being trans (what the actual fuck, how self centered do you have to be to think that my identity has anything to do with you)

He's accusing me of making fun of him for cosplaying, singing, and acting which 1. I HAVE NEVER AND WILL NEVER DO TO ANYONE and 2. Are all things that I do as a hobby. I've literally only ever tried to encourage him with all of these things and he's going to blatantly lie to me through text about things that I did??? What the actual fuck.

I've never acted like I hate anyone, and if I have I can garentee you that it was meant as a joke.

He says that I'm not motivated to grow up but I'm literally furthering my career in a field that I'm passionate in and loving myself through all of the hardships that I face, that's mature as fuck.

He complains that he hates the county that we live in and I've agreed with him that it's kinda a bad place but I've got family and shit to do here so I don't hate it.

Kaliym is the person he was planning on "homewrecking" and me and kaliyms friendships is very different from mine and his. I joke that I hate kaliym to his face and he's like "I love you too" bc he knows I dont mean it. But this dude can come back in my life for a week after beening gone for over a year and think that he knows me.

Honestly I'm glad this happened because this is what a toxic friendship looks like and it needed to end.

My parting words for this post and specifically for him are as follows.

Fuck you.

#personal #frienship #toxic #toxic masculinity #toxic love #friends #trans #queer #genderfluid #gender nonconforming #gender identity #what a shitshow #bullying

[icharchivist]

I was rewatching DGM hallow and I remembered that Lavi and Bookman occasionally engage in telepathic conversations. How come I've never seen this talked about more in all the years I've been in this fandom? This is really weird. Even most of the Noahs think it's weird/creepy when someone reads their thoughts/talks in their head. The more I think about the Bookman the creepier they get. I'm not implying they're evil. Just really weird. 1) Telepathic w/each other. 2) Not only against attachments-

2 but against having a heart (not even the past Jedi at their most radical taught padawans to not feel anything). 3) If Bookman and Lavi are the standard then they either think they're above humanity or hate humans or or just indifferent. 4) they have SO many secrets that they keep to themselves no matter what. 5) they will never feel loyalty for anyone/thing that doesn't further their own ambition and even then they can easily drop you like you mean nothing to them. 5) They routinely erase-

3 each other's minds and none of them remember their birth names. 6) they swap identities so many times their own growth as individuals is trivial. 7) Ever single (possible) bookman we have met has either exhibited creepy or hostile behaviour. 8) they take to neutrality so strongly you can question if they even think to care what will happen to them if the Earl's plans succeed. 9) Are they even self aware? I'm not expecting a complete disaster. But I am expecting the bookman to weird me out.

Okay so for the telepathy i will have to come back to it when i will re-read it bc i don’t really remember it in Hallow and I think the scene I think should be that one??? Is the fact that ii’m almost certain i remember it being confirmed that Lavi and Bookman talk a whole other language. Apparently the Bookmen would have had their own language and I think i remember that in the manga it was translated by having weird bubbles to specify they were talking in that language (and it is possible that, due to the fact the anime couldn’t just pull a new language that was a work around to still have one of their Bookmen conversation being visible using telepathy).

But i really don’t remember the scene in question in details so i will have to check that out again but I THINK it is Bookman Language related more than telepathy and that the telepathy was a way for the anime to translate it

THAT SAID if the idea of Telepathy is a thing (which tbh could still be??? Bookmen already messes with minds a lot with the whole deleting memories thing who knows the hell they can do) it could explain also a lot of much more silent looks that we kinda justified so far by “they know something we don’t”. It might have been conversations we missed. 

Still unsure though i’ll get back to that when i will properly have re-read those parts bc this is really intruiguing me now

I know the fandom had talked about the Bookman’s language though but i’ve never heard of telepathy before now?? Idk 

And yeah like you say this is very weird bc putting them on the same level as Wisely is... very weird. Besides considering how much Lavi still struggles to get people around him i am fairly certain that if telepathy there are it i between the Bookmen only, not all knowing as Wisely.

But yeah aside from that, mood. The Bookmen are seriously a creepy brunch. Not in a bad way, but in a “this is extremely shady and I get you’re doing that to be neutral but i’m not sure those means are actually legally or morally applicable”

I agree with all your points. 

and i’ll elaborate under cut bc i might have gone carried away,

well 1) i just discussed it there, either Telepathy which would be a whole new can of worm, or a whole other language that would still applies that they have a special language to keep secrets in. And tbh it would also make sense that they would write down records in a secret language since they don’t actually let people Read their reccordings: Bookman specify that it comes with the part to “chat a lot”, they won’t share the written reccords (which they MUST HAVE for the the survival of the clan), so “Secret Language no one else in the world know” rings as shady to me.

4) NOT TO MENTION we know that Bookman also keeps secrets from Lavi (when meeting Cross’s altered akuma, Bookman specifies it was only something he (and Cross) knew about.). And it’s not to mention secrets that the Bookman in charge keeps from the rest of the Clan (see again, how Lavi’s eye is only known by Bookman Sr, not anyone else in the clan seems aware of that)

6) Apparently about their switching identities, something very creepy that came out of the latest Komui corner too is that the name they have during a war is the name that the recording will officially get. Meaning it’s not even that “Lavi” calls himself like that for the people around him, it’s that even after Jr would have moved on or died or anything, the Records of the Holy War would still be called “Lavi”. And we know that the names picked seems to have meaning that applies to each wars (as Wisely smugly smile realizing Lavi’s name’s meaning, but doesn’t tell people). So even more of a disconnect with their sense of humanity since they have to be distanced from their own names, as their names become history as it goes. Which makes Jr’s identity crisis over how “Lavi” is “him” even more creepy tbh, bc it extends that “Lavi” isn’t just a reccord name anymore, it is not just the Holy War anymore, it is part of Jr as a BEING. And to me that’s even creepier that it’s even something Lavi has to worry about.

8) this is honestly one of my biggest questions. If the Earl’s plans work, all humanity will die. Or at least there had been no mention so far of any “saved people that would go through the Ark”. (there had been speculations about the real purpose of the Akuma and how its evolution process would be perhaps a part in creating supperior beings to salvage during the Flood like the original Ark did, and i’ll need to get back to the chapters tha thints that there are more secrets to the Dark Matter than it just reversing the innocence, BUT personally I have issues with this theory because of how easily the Noah do torture and kill the Akuma at times and seem to look down on them. But I would agree there seems to be a bigger purpose to the Akuma and the Dark Matter that we cannot even imagine.)Regardless, I don’t see anyway for the Bookmen Clan to survive, else the Noah would have found way to keep them on their sides and not torture them like they do now and exclude them. Yet we know at some points the Bookmen were “on the Noah’s side”. So what the hell do the Bookmen expect to happen with the Flood? Is their neutrality so important that they are ready to litteraly go down with this ship when the end of the world come? Yet we know they have some self preservating instinct it seems, so why? It just enerves me so much!

9) Yeah same, basically.

One last thing i will add: How the HELL did Bookman manage to find himself and Lavi innocences he knew they would be accomodator to when they decided to join the Order? Bc the Corner mentions that Bookman decided to set them into the Order to watch BEFORE they even got in contact with the innocences, and Lavi mentions that “Gramps just knew we’ll find innocences we would be compatible with” and how????? How the hell??? You can’t just make it that easy for the two of them to randomly connect with two random innocences (and we know they’re the one who have shown the least actual connection with the innocence) after arcs and arcs proving that the innocence is picky and sentient, that its own personality affects who they end up picking, that even the synch can change depending of how the innocence feel to their acomodator, and Especially, that the Order had DECADES of experimentations that were basic human rights violation due to how desperate they were to not be able to have enough people synchronizing with the innocence.

You  cannot have a full arc of telling us the Order did an entiere experiment about bringing fallen exorcists’s brains back in new bodies in hope the innocence would synch with said bodies, while letting those bodies decay under the pain of the innocence, for the sLIGHT CHANCE an innocence could be compatible again, only to then tell us “oh yeah we wanted to join the order so we ended up finding two innocences that we could connect to.”

For exemple: Take the Crows. it’s obvious the Crows want to help the holy war, as the Third Exorcist project proved a whole brunch of people were ready to put Dark Matter in their body to fight back the Akuma. And from all those Crows, from all the experiments we know the Order have carried on, somehow, as long as we don’t know of a “Former Crow Exorcist”, it means it’s not that easy. Not when you have a whole military branch who would be willing to be God’s apostles. And it’s not even counting how others Orders’s soldiers like the Finders would or not jump on the occasion.

So how the hell did they do that? How the hell did Bookman find those? bc even if they don’t connect to their innocence on an emotional level, they seem like proper innocence. Else Allen would have commented about how the souls don’t disappear like planned, like when he saw how the Third Exorcists killed the Akuma. Besides, we also know Bookman fears Lavi’s innocence could turn into a crystal type, so it confirms this is legit innocence, and that Bookman doesn’t have full controle over it.

How could Bookman be so sure they will become accomodator BEFORE finding any innocences? It raises seriously worrying implications considering all we know about the innocence and how hard it is to find accomodators for it this far in the saga. 

*take s a deep breath* anyway that said,

tbh part of me understand the feeling of “wanting to disconnect your feelings” when you watch history happens, because history is goddamn overwhelming. For having studied history for a few years i’ve personally had a few breakdown just over thinking about the amounts of horrors you read about one year after the other, so to have to remember all those horrors AND reccord current horrors, I understand in principle the thought that shutting those emotions down is the easiest way to record it. 

In principle.

Because in practice this is (a lot like you compared) nearly impossible witout losing their humanity and even losing perhaps an important part of how to understand and translate human experiences through emotional lenses. That’s the major issue with this logic.

had they done that for so long they don’t even question it? Or are they perfectly aware that it’s exactly why they cannot afford emotions? what are their view on the world and it coming to an end? How far are they willing to go in order to keep their own secrecy and status squo? Do they even realize the possible irony of them “not meedling with history” while the only fact that they are meddling by taking the dispositions they do to remain hidden/uninvolved? Not to mention that wanting it or not, Bookman and Lavi had meddled in the Holy War. Would they remain fully neutral, Bookman wouldn’t have had to tell everything he knew about the Noah to Komui in his first appearance for exemple. 

Lately it seems like they seem more interested in the Noah losing (self preservation kicking in) but that does raise the question of how far they are willing to share the secret history and how much is considered “medding with history”? Because this “secret knowledge no one should have” IS changing the course of history by being shared.

Do they even realize or do they really see themselves as walking books who can deliver information if pressed a the condition it doesn’t require to dig in their secrets? Where do they draw the lines?

I have HUNDREDS of questions about the Bookmen and it drives me insane. I won’t exclude that i might be overthinking it bc man, gotta wait between chapters huh, and that perhaps it won’t be that complicated or deep, but the more you get to see how shady the Bookmen are the more you wonder how and why?

Anyway that fascinates me. Bookmen pls unlock your secrets,,

#ichafantalks dgm #bookmenstuff #Anonymous #ichareply

[survivorredemptionislands]

Ep 1 Confessionals Pt 1 | "Rough With a Captial Ugh" - Stephen

I will not be invisible this season! Okay but in all honesty I still think it’s funny I’m the only one who’s managed to snag that award. The galaxy edge alumni are acting like we have never met each other before which is really funny. I guess because for some of us it was a fever dream lol💜 I’m trying to fix any bonds I may have broken that season and start anew with people. This is redemption and I’m going to play my heart out. Xoxo Jessie

Night 1 has been good. I’ve talked to 2/3 of the people on my team. I haven’t spoken to Isaiah yet since he is a late addition and I think at work (I just know he said he couldn’t talk until later). But I got along with him well in Sunset Rodeo, I just hope he is more active here because I would like to actively work with him. I’m really not feeling these small teams tho bc that’s scary since there are so few options so you gotta make sure you’re talking with everyone consistently. I just hope everyone on my team resists the temptations and gives all their items up so we can remain safe and get the reward. Based on the other seasons I can see the crystal kingdom team losing bc Shane was a villain and I can see him continue that. Overall this is a good cast and there are a good amount of people I want to work with, let’s just hope that they want to work with me as well. For now that’s all...stay litty.

Hello from the mystical beyond, ooooooooooOOOooOOoOOoOOOOOOooohhhhhh... Ghost Team. Way cool. The first season of Tumblr Survivor I ever played had a similar twist and I'm geeking out over how full circle this is. Love love love it. Truly #blessed. So, night one and my team has already chatted a bit, had a call to sort out the challenge, and enough time has passed since that I feel comfortable giving point-form thoughts. Daisy: INCREDIBLY cool. Been a long while since I've clicked with anyone this naturally off the bat. We made a few dumb jokes pre-call, kept up the good vibes during, geeked out over music afterward. Not someone I see myself writing down soon. Lily: Seems pleasant, and not only happy but eager to take on the team leader role. I stepped back and let her take the reins but I have to admit that I'm very worried on this challenge because of it — more below. As a person, Lily strikes me as sweet. I'll have to make a point of discussing Sea of Thieves with her because she mentioned playing it, and I've been playing more recently with some buddies. Luke: Didn't get to chat tons, but I like what he's putting down. Seems almost happy-go-lucky, but with a definite ability to shift gears and be a pain when the situation calls for it. I like him so far and hope our conversation evolves past our respective geographies, but it's hard to fault him for it when we linked up at about 2 a.m. his time. Lydia: Aw, I love Lydia! We've got a history in games, mostly good. But she also knows I'm good and I know they're good. I suspect it won't be long before that's out and one of us needs to cut the other to get further. If Lydia cuts me, no beef no qualms. I'd hope the same in the inverse. But my intent is to run as far as we can together. Challenge: Nervous. I made a point of immediately mentioning the time tiebreaker and how it may benefit us to just dump everything. It's something I've seen before where a similar challenge happened, and only one or two people took things, making them an obvious target. So if the same pattern follows here... we're all but assured to be going to pirate council. Lily was very assertive in deciding that we should keep powers. Since then, I've heard from Lydia and Daisy suggesting they may just abandon everything, which I'd be SO happy to hear. Even if we do go, though, I THINK I'd be okay on this team? idk everyone seems chill. Ugh this is already more than I wanted to write. Sorry I promise I won't write walls of text every single time! I'm going to break that promise, I bet.

I really enjoyed getting to know my teammates and hope we crush the other teams :))

omg never thought i'd be coming back?? i'm rly excited to see all these important people and cause even more chaos and i'm pumped to get someone rocked out again!!!

chrispy: literally so amazing so funny and i am so ready to get to play a game with him where he doesn't go home right away hopefully asya: only ever heard of her and i'm rly pumped to maybe get to know her!!! timmy: FUCK YEAH I LOVE TIMMY WE VIBE ALL THE TIME shane: we wanted to work together SO BAD and all we did was get rocks to happen so now we're f2 so we can win giraffez: literally never heard of them so uhhh kinda liking them??? this intro is so good???? ZOE: I WOULD DIE FOR ZOE WE'RE LITERALLY COHOSTS NOW so i want to work with her pleaseeeeeee adam john: as long as he doesn't get drunk i think we'll be fine LMAO idk how far they'll make it sam l: THE CHILD im honestly ready for this it's hilarious and maybe this time we won't take him out right away stephen: i'm p sure? he got robbed in one of the games i was in? so i hope he doesn't get robbed this time LMAO jessie: QUEEN SHIT WE LOVE ONE ANOTHER and i love how she's literally invisible and i hope she makes it far lmao. we've been in a f3 together before too matt: also don't know them but probably a vibe seems cool mj: GOTTA BEAT HIM TO WIN ARI'S LOVE BACK he looks so serious jabari: LITERALLY SUCH GOOD VIBES DURING COUNCILS I WANT TO BE HER FRIEND jinx: I WILL NOT LET JINX GET IDOLED THIS TIME LMAOOOO i'm so happy they got to come back for this isaiah: i hope they are a vibe

This 4-teams twist is Rough with a capital UGH. Nowhere to hide, no new people to really get to know. Pair that with a challenge that doesnt promot teamwork and incites drama I am concerned. However so far my team has been pretty chill, talking openly about what we want to keep. Bonus this has led to me and Matt talking a lot and I think he might have formed a duo? Still tentative, who knows if hes saying the same thing to giraffez or Chris, but hopeful. We’re considering talking the half votes, this would mean at any pirate we would have the majority. However now the questions comes up about whether we tell the others.

Isaiah still isn't really around and I messaged him and nothing so far. We asked in the team chat if he had submitted and radio silence. I know during Sunset Rodeo he had a busy work schedule so I am assuming that is the case right now, but I hope he at least submitted for this challenge and that we are safe from pirate council. If we're not...welp I guess he is at risk.

We're safe wooo!!! But damn people took stuff. I wanted to be safe so I said here take all my shit so we get the damn points, but I guess these bitches are a bit greedy. Am I shocked though...no, because that is part of the challenge, people will take shit. Do I think it will help them...also no, because it's truly not game changing items and there still seems to be a bit left to do for the idol hunt than these items will provide.

#confessionals #MutinyOnTheSeaOfRedemption

[hahcatallena]

ukiyo | heechul | 4

(n.) living in the moment, detached from the bothers of life

pairing: kim heechul x reader (ft. bestfriend!taehyung)

genre: age difference, brothers best friend, smut

word count: 1689k

warnings: okay so I have no idea if I could get in trouble for this since the reader is yet to turn legal and there’s smut so… but y'all know what you’re getting yourself into everyone knows that heechul is an oldie lmao (tho I made him 7 years younger, meaning he’s 27… just to make sure eehhh)

.

PART 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 coming soon!

.

2:13am and he texted you, saying that he was standing outside your house now and that you should hurry.

You opened the door and before any of you could say a word, you signalled him to not say a word with your finger on your lip. He stood there for a moment, his eyes proudly locked on your neck that was still covered in the traces of his lips.

You let him in and the both of you silently walked up the stairs to your room so that Leeteuk wouldn't notice you secretly inviting someone.

Opening the door to your room, you told him to rush inside. You closed the door and locked it and just when you wanted to turn around to face him, he pushed you against the wood, connecting your lips. You went through his hair with one hand, while the other was placed around the back of his neck. His body was pressed against yours and when his left hand slipped under your shirt, you gasped. He hasn't done that before so it was a bit weird at first, but you let him. His hand drove over the skin of your body until it came to a stop when he found out that you weren't wearing a bra underneath, so of course he smiled into the kiss because he liked that. He started massaging your breast and played around with your hardened nipple.

Flashbacks to yesterday flashed through your mind, when you felt his erection pressed against you once again, feeling even more uncomfortable considering how hard you were pushed against the door.

Heechul disconnected his hands from your body to open his tracksuits jacket and took it off, leaving him in a simple white shirt. Shortly after he placed his hands on your hips and slid your panties off until they were hanging on your knees. From there on you slipped out of them yourself.

Not even ten seconds later he pushed down his own track pants and you were not even surprised by him not wearing anything underneath. Seems like he's always prepared for this stuff.

The both of you moved two meters to the wall next to your door, since it could've been heard if you continued this against the wood. You could feel Heechul pushing his tongue inside your mouth so you gave him access and it felt amazing.

"Do you have condoms?"

"What?" you shrieked. "I thought you-"

Why would you have condoms? When would you even have the chance to buy them and even if you did, you didn't even know which ones to get.

He looked at you in disbelief, slamming his forehead against the wall right next to your head in frustration, mubling something that sounded like fuck.

You couldn't help but feel bad now. He didn't tell you to get some but then again maybe you should keep some at home in the future. For your own safety.

"I'm s-sorry I, I didn't know." your gaze drops to the ground. You were ashamed. Should you feel this way? No idea, but it was not your fault only. "What now?"

Heechul pushed his head back to look at your lips, coming closer to softly kiss them in a gentleman kind of way. You felt your whole body shivering at the gentle gesture and drove your hands through his thic hair, pulling at the strands.

"You know," he said in between kisses. You started breathing heavily at how good he made you feel. He made his way to your ear and softly bit down on the earlobe. "we can be careful." he whispered seductively.

You gasped. Did he mean that? Was he serious about this? He must've been joking because everyone knows how we can be careful ends.

You stopped breathing and when he noticed that, he disconnected your bodies, looking at you awaiting an answer. He must've definitely noticed your nervousness so he placed his hands on both sides of your waist, smirking right into your eyes with a deep stare. "Nothing will happen, I promise."

It was wrong, so fucking wrong and you shouldn't even think about going with this bullshit but something told you that if you said no, it would be over. Over as in not only tonight, but you were sure that he wouldn't ask you ever again, which would be selfish, but you knew how he was like. You knew his character and this was definitely what he would do so what else was there for you to do but to say... "Okay."

Heechul bit his bottom lip, satisfied with your decision and harshly connected your lips with his again, only that this time it seemed more passionate. He moved his right hand down to your lower region and spread your juices all over your folds. "So wet for me." he said in between soft kisses against the angles of your mouth. Hearing him say that made your whole face heated up and you could feel the butterflies in your stomach once again.

He started stroking his dick and placed it in front of your entrance. "Do you want this?" Without hesitation you nodded giving him a yes, so he pushed in.

Other than last time, he pushed in completely this time, filling you up all at once. It was different. You didn't know if it was better or just about the same but you liked it. When he started moving, there was no pain anymore so when he asked if it hurt, you were kind of glad to say that it didn't.

You have to admit that it's weird, having sex against the wall, but this way there was so much more pressure. Good pressure as in you could feel him inside of you even better and god you loved the feeling.

It was only yesterday when he fucked you in the parking lot at the backseat of his car and thinking back on how yesterday you used a condom, you definitely liked feeling him so much more. It felt twice, no thrice as good to have his dick like this rather than some latex in between you two.

Heechuls hands wandered down to your buttcheeks and he squeezed them hardly. It didn't hurt, it felt amazing. He could do whatever he wanted and you swear that you'd let him. No matter what it was.

He kept on fucking you hard against the wall and you had no idea if it could be heard but even if it was, you wouldn't stop. "Fuck baby you're so tight."

Baby.

Your heart almost sprang out of your chest at his words. You smiled against his neck, your arms wrapped around his head to steady yourself somehow, while he grabbed your right leg to hold it up for better access and to push in even further. As he did so, you let out some quiet moans and so did he.

"I'm going to c-come soon." Heechul announced and it was not only him who was close to the edge. You could already feel your orgasm building itself up in your stomach. "Fuck, fuck I'm so close." he added.

One last time, he sped up and that's all you needed for the sensation to take you over completely. You hid your head in Heechuls neck and tried your best to hold in your moans while he was riding out your orgasm. Only seconds later his movements became sloppier "Call me o-oppa!" he literally begged and that's what you did. That's everything he needed to come. And he came so hard, spilling his cum inside of you, which felt so! good!!!

You stood there, still pressed against the wall, when suddenly, reality hit you and you jumped away from him.

"Fuck, fuck!!" you started to panick! "Heechul what the fuck!! You said you'd be careful!!" You sat down at the edge of your bed, tears starting to appear in the edges of your eyes. Your hands found the strands of your hair and out of frustration you pulled at them.

Heechul composedly slammed his head against the wall next to him, until he turned around to face a crying you. "Yah stop crying."

It was so obvious! So obvious that this would happen but no, you had to agree on this.

"What am I supposed to do now?" you asked the older, with your eyes still watering. He looked around, not really seeming to take all of this serious.

"We will just get you this morning after pill." he shrugged as if it was nothing.

"Tomorrow is Sunday there won't be any opened pharmacies." you drop your head into your palms. What are you going to do? This must be a joke.

"We can get it on Monday." he convinced you, still standing in the middle of the room, not even a bit nervous when he slid into his tracksuit pants.

Some part of you wanted him to sit down next to you and maybe, pull you into a hug or something. But he didn't do that. He was not the type of person to comfort someone so you didn't expect it anyway.

After some minutes of silence, he was completely dressed again and then picked up your shorts to hand them to you.

It was shortly past 3 in the morning. "I should be going." he said, looking like he'd do anything not to be here right now, maybe even annoyed. You just nodded, disappointed at his action and tried to form a smile.

You followed him downstairs and stopped when he turned around one last time. "Don't freak out this can happen."

That's all he's said after patting your head with a smile which you worriedly returned. Then he left and you closed the door.

Was tonight real? Did you really trust him with your body only for him not to keep his promise? He didn't even say sorry nor frraked out with you.

So why on earth were you still not mad at him?

.

a/n: sorry it's a short one but this must be my favorite so far bc smut huhuhu ^^

#heechul #kim heechul #heenim #suju #superjunior #super junior #suju scenario #suju imagine #suju au #super junior au #super junior smut #suju smut #super junior scenario #super junior imagine #heechul imagine #heechul scenario #heechul smut #kpop #kpop fanfic #kpop smut #kpop scenario #smut #fanfic #fanfiction

[illfoandillfie]

Hi, a tarot reading for a specific question please. This guy L and I have been fucking around a bit whenever we get drunk for the past two months, nothing serious. For me it’s just for the fun of it, I hope it’s the same for him. But he’s kind of in a rough spot right now. He’s the type to try and distract himself from his problems tho. I don’t know if I should start anything the next time I see him (tho idk when that’ll be bc of our exams)? I'm also not sure about his feelings. Thanks!

thank you for that clarification! hopefully this helps clear things up for you!

tarot: ace of wands, justice, king of cups, 4 of cups, ace of cups, the high priestess, 2 of pentacles.

So I focused on asking about L’s feelings regarding the casual hookups to try and gauge where he’s at with it all. If you have any follow up questions though feel free to ask and I’ll pull more cards (probably over the weekend lmao)

Anyway. The first card is the ace of wands. This symbolises desire, creation, willpower and inspiration. And it’s being clarified by the 4 of cups (contemplation, disappointment, overactive imagination) as well as the ace of cups (new feelings, attraction, new relationships). From these cards it looks like he might be thinking about something more serious than you are. With the ace of wands it definitely started off as just a fun sort of thing, just a desire to make out a little or whatever but with the other two cards it seems like that might not be enough for him anymore and he’s starting to develop feelings towards you. 

Our next cards are justice and the high priestess. Now, the justice card is about balance, clarity and truth. You said that L is in a rough spot right now and this card is making me feel like he’s trying to rebalance his life by forming an attachment with you. Like, things aren’t going well for him in one aspect of his life so he’s trying to create a positive shift in another area, if that makes sense. Generally this card in a romance reading would indicate an almost karmic return - a partner treating you as well as you treat them, if you cheat the truth will come out but if you put in effort you’ll be met with a supportive and caring partner. But in relation to L it feels like a very internal sort of a decision where he’s trying to tip the scales in his favour a little bit and has (consciously or subconsciously) come to the conclusion that what you’re doing is fun and good so taking it further can only be better. I think part of what makes it feel like that is that justice is being clarified by the high priestess. The high priestess is a card of secrets and mystery but also intuition and an inner voice. There’s some really interesting connections with these cards. truth and clarity vs mystery and an unrevealed future. But ultimately the high priestess is about knowledge and listening to that small intuitive voice in your head. If L’s inner voice is telling him you can provide a form of happiness that he’s not getting somewhere else and can rebalance his life, then he may be considering that option. 

Our final two cards are the king of cups and the two of pentacles. The king could represent L or it could be you. Because I was asking about L’s thoughts on your situation while I was drawing the cards I would be inclined to say it’s possibly how he views himself but, you may have a clearer idea of who the king is representing. So, the king of cups is compassionate but in control. He’s mature and wise (because he’s a king) as well as creative and a good friend. Interestingly there’s a connection to the high priestess as the king can also represent the unconscious, particularly connected to emotions. But, even more interestingly there’s a connection to justice here as well as the two of pentacles. Balance. All three of those cards (justice. king of cups. 2 of pents.) are related to balance in some for or other. 

Justice, being major arcana, is like the big picture stuff, it’s the balance of the universe. The king of cups is an internal balance between intellect and emotions. And the 2 of pentacles is a day to day sort of balance - balancing priorities or decisions and adapting to changes.  But balance is clearly a key part of L’s feelings towards you and about your hook up situation. I can’t say if it’s a choice he’s settled on or a vague notion in the back of his head or just a feeling he hasn’t even really noticed yet but there’s definitely a strong chance he’s projecting more feelings onto your encounters than you are and probably more than he should be.

I also pulled from my channelled messages oracle deck to try and get a sense of what his thoughts regarding you might be. Take these with as many grains of salt as you like. Anyway, here’s what the messages say:

I want to get you drunk. Listen. I nearly screamed when this one came out. Clearly, he enjoys being with you while you’re both drinking and fooling around and would like it to happen again. But under it we have this love scares me. Now in this deck, grey cards reflect confusion so this isn’t a clear thought he’s having, likely it’s not even really consciously “love”. He might know he’s attracted to you and that something in how he sees you has shifted but he’s not fully aware of exactly how or why and so it’s kind of unnerving him a little. Part of his interest in seeing you again under similar circumstances to the last however many times might be related to curiosity and wondering if something really has changed. 

Then we have I just wish things were different. To me this is about his general situation, the rough spot he’s in. There’s a desire for it to be different, better. And then under it is you make my heart full. Which seems to evoke a similar sort of vibe to that justice card where thoughts of you and the fun you have together are sort of an antidote to the shit he’s experiencing elsewhere. Mentioning his heart is also another indicator that the king of cups is his version of himself because the suit of cups is tied to the heart and emotions and having a handle on them. 

...Maybe... another card of confusion and followed by the bold and bright Love Me. This is another sort of thought that isn’t deliberate (yet). He’s only beginning to piece together the connection he’s seemed to have formed between things bad but you good and this is like his brain clicking over and joining the dots and arriving at... love me....maybe. It’s still not certain but the is the seed of an idea there. 

Then we have I just want you all the time and I want a fresh start with you, both in reverse. This is one of the few decks where I actually taking reversals into consideration because I think reversing a card can change the meaning of the words. And I think it definitely does with these. He doesn’t want you all the time, he enjoys being with you when you are together but this reversal shows that it’s not a desperate need to be with you, it’s not his main driving force whenever you see each other. He likes you, he has fun with you, but he hasn’t yet reached a point of wanting to pursue you. The fresh start one definitely has the energy of an ace (hence the giant 1 on the card lmao) and if that was the right way around I’d say it was an indicator of him wanting to ask you out and move your relationship to the next level. BUT. With it being reversed, I don’t feel like that’s the case. I think theres a possibility it could one day reach that point, especially if his rough spot doesn’t start to smooth over any time soon, but for now it’s a bit of a passing fancy, a little crush maybe. 

#card readings #last one for tonight #i'll get to the rest of them asap but probably not until the weekend

[icharchivist]

One thing that strikes me (and I'm sure you'll go into more depth about it in your re read) is how Road called themselves (Noah) sacrificial lambs for the Earl. It makes me wonder if towards the end of the war there will be some greater meaning to this. Like Road and the other Noah must offer up their literal lives on this Earth in order for Adam to complete his task. Okay this is going a little beyond what we have in canon. But what if we have different dimensions/timelines going on here? -

2 It has been theorized Allen has been to or known about futuristic looking apocolypses. Which means, unless all this took place in the literal pre flood past already, there might be records of alternative realms the bookman are aware of. Perhaps collecting info from other realities in order to help save their own? There has also been the question of where the akuma souls really go and if it will one day be explored in more detail. Perhaps since Allen and the other Noah may all die in this -

3 they're mean't to go to the realm where whoever god is? Since Adam declared war on dgm's god or whatever that being is. Maybe the problem is Adam has to figure put how to stop his Noah family from reincarnating so the memories/soul can pass on and finish the war in wherever the Innocence originated from. Destroying the Heart and then offering themselves upon the altar is just the first step. Which is why Allen, being a noah might have to be killed alongside the Noah and why the Noah are so -

4 determined (despite any issues with Nea) to cut off his Innocence and invite him into the family. Allen is a necessary part to both the Heart and Adam in order for them to complete their goals. For Adam he needs Allen to die w/him. For the Heart it needs Allen to live for it. It's possible Allen will end up dying but have to go to thhe realm where the Innocence god is alongside the Noah but fight the Noah's there so their reincarnation ends for good and their goals of not accomplished.

Okay I admit we have... nearly not enough information about it so far and i really don’t know @.@ even theorizing seems even more far fetched to me.

There is also the question of what is the purpose of the Akuma - the Earl is clear that there is more to their purpose than what we let on. We know yet that the Noah have no problem torturing and destroying some of those souls as well. 

There is the question of where akuma souls go when they’re destroyed by Dark Matter and when they’re destroyed by innocence, there is a clear salvation/distress dicotomy in between them, but apparently the Akuma exists still further than as weapons.

As for why there would be sacrifice....

I personally tend to beleive it’s a cicle - of the Flood happened before already, it will happen again, and there are perhaps parts of history that remembers. I tend to believe it more easily than different timelines all together bc it would be a lot to swallow as a new info. The Bookmen perhaps would have more info in general though. And I believe Allen somewhat managed to see a previous world destruction - or a future one? Something connected with the flow of life.

“Destroying the Heart and then offering themselves upon the altar is just the first step.” i think it’s a very likely ending. As far as we know, this script had repeated itself over and over again. There is one great flood recorded in the records, but it seems like this battle had gone on and on and on. And I think the previous Earl showed that he was tired with this same cicle repeating, with him giving up his form and separating himself in two. So I would be inclined to believe the Noah are trying to break the cycle, eventually by finally bringing it one last time to an end.

In the Text, the Flood was about rebirthal. It was about God whipping off the Earths all that was unworthy, that had strayed away from the path, and the Nephilim (the offsprings of humanity and angels), and only chosing Noah and his family to create an ark to secure what he wanted to be preserved from the Flood: mainly a pair of each animals. After the Flood, God showed regrets and didn’t want anything like that to happen ever again, and hoped Noah’s family will set up a new future.

Now in the manga, if we associate to that, we would have therefore a Noah family set into protecting what’s worth protecting, and letting the world’s abomination to be destroyed - including people with “angel matters” (like innocence?). 

It would make the Akuma the animals being spared by the flood, which i personally find really strange with how the Akuma seems very tortured by the way they are being, how the souls are suffering. If that’s their view of preserving, there is a twisted catch. And the secret of the Akuma...doesn’t feel to me like it could redeem that. (like if the souls suffering where the people who tried to defy god and call for their loved one, fine, but the Akuma’s tragedy is that the souls suffering never asked for it. Why would they be considered more worth saving than souls who loved so much they could bring people back to life?)

The manga says, from the Order’s POV that the Earl wasn’t satisfied with the way God finished the work, and that there was more to clean on Earth. 

But from the Noah’s sides, everything about God is... a mess. And blurry. And very hard to understand when they mean “The Order’s god” and Their own God. Tbh even if i hope my reread helps me understand it i keep blacking out when they get mentioned because i am missing the key pieces to put those together.

But I do believe it’s likely there is an attempt into breaking the cycle - if so, it would be by destroying the Heart to stop it from coming back again, and destroying the full Noah family in order to stop them from reincarnating. that’s one possible outcome.

The other possible outcome is a more simple, the Noah were humans after all. The gene of Noah is passed down into every humans and any humans can awaken the gene. The reasons why those 12 specifically did is still up for debate. But perhaps being chosen is itself a sacrifice, as you have to sacrifice your humanity in order to push to the destruction of humanity.

Last but not least, would the Noah manage to destroy humanity all together with the new Flood, there would be no way for the gene to actually get passed down again. If the Noah manages to pull on their flood, there will be no possible way for them to be reincarnated. Even if they don’t get sacrified in the process of starting the Flood, they will be by the only fact that if they manage, they will not be able to come back later on.

So the aspect of sacrifice can come in multiple shape and form and we’re far from having any answers about that. It could be just as much about killing them, as it is that they are giving their lives away by being Noah, as it is that if they manage their goals, all of them will never come back.

As for whenever they’ll try to reach for God or not... I don’t know. “God” is too ambiguious in that manga for me to know. I don’t know what to do with God’s mentions nor how it would play latter on orz

so yeah that’s definitly not my comfort zone there but... i really don’t know. I hope we get to learn more but so far.. yeah.

#it's all over the place i'm sorry #but i truly don't know orz #ichafantalks dgm #Anonymous #ichareply