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#im not in control of my own body anymore
m00ngbin · 4 months
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Uh warning this whole thing is me complaining about my bones and pain and stuff so if you're sick of hearing about that you should probably ignore this
Whatever's wrong with my knee spread to my hip so I think that maybe I WILL be needing a cane or something soon and it's not just a joke I was making cause I had to keep sitting down in random places
Joke might be the wrong word because it wasn't really a joke and it wasn't funny, I was just trying to be lighthearted and it didn't seem like it was really happening or that it was probable
#sorry if we're ever in a public place and i suddenly make us stop so i can sit down for a few seconds#its not because im lazy or im trying to be annoying i swear#something ive been thinking about is disability#i don't think im disabled because i can still get around and do things but sometimes it is a little difficult and im worried that#in the future I'll have a really hard time walking without pain and ill have to depend on someone more than i already do#im already going to need to live with someone for the rest of my life anyway because of mental health stuff and i really dont want to have#to give up what freedom i have left#i read somewhere that disability forces you to rely on people and it takes away your independence and totally overhauls your life#and that disability really destroys your walls surrounding asking others for help/support#being independent and being self sufficient#i pride myself on my independence and self sufficiency and seeing that slowly start trickling away while theres nothing i can do about it#and nobody knows what to do to stop it is really painful#maybe it wont get so bad that ill be fully reliant but the possibility is there and not knowing is really scary#my choice and my autonomy are being ripped away and it not a person thats doing it its my own body#im not in control of my own body anymore#maybe im being dramatic but it really doesnt feel like it#because i am slowly watching my joints get worse and i am completely helpless. i cant do anything. im watching whatever this is spread and#not a single person can tell me what it is or why its happening
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mistycrunch · 1 year
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Nighttime discoveries
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triggeringtommy · 9 days
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*kicking my feet n twirling my hair* i wanna kill myself
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sludgee · 6 months
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Ever since I started going by he/they pronouns it's fucking rocked. My cousin calls me he/him a lot and a king and it just rules man. I love being nonbinary and I love being masc. I can't wait for my top surgery it's gonna be so good and I'm so happy
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willowfey · 6 months
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genuine question does anyone have any tips on how to manage prolonged constant extreme anxiety? like the kind where u have to always stay distracted bc any second alone with ur thoughts will send u into a nauseous pit. the kind that makes it so u never get a restful sleep and u never have an appetite and ur hands are always shaking and ur muscles are painfully tense. anyone know uh…… what i can do about that
(i don’t have insurance atm and my medical anxiety is far too high to get anything prescribed atm so i need things that i can do on my own other than breathing and i’m sick of reading articles)
#it feels like it did when my mom was sick and i couldn’t think about anything else for months#except my mom ISN’T sick anymore. so there’s no one reason i can point to#it’s just always there. my stomach hurts my jaw hurts my body hurts#i can do things to stay distracted but when the night rolls back around i feel like i’m trapped in a haunted house#i’m just so tired i wanna cry about it. i want to relax so bad. i want to feel okay and safe and rested SO FUCKING BAD#i didn’t used to be like this i hatehatehate it i don’t wanna be like this or feel like this anymore#not to mention my sister has such high anxiety rn too that even if i’m distracting my own brain she can pull me back into it with hers#how do i exist without being endlessly terrified of everything that could happen to anyone at any time?#without the constant painful awareness of every tick of every second passing by?#im like this close to a meltdown at all times. i’d rather be apathetic than this it’s breaking my bones#i’m physically safe in that i want to remind anyone reading this that i have never been yk. suicidal or anything it’s not like that at all.#i want to be here i’m just SCARED sgajshsnd i’m just shaky and tired and tense and aaaaaaaaa#i need help. idek what that means i just need someone else to tell me it’s gonna be okay#(@ the friends that DO tell me that every day. i love u so much i appreciate u so much. i wish my body would remember it)#i put my feet in grass today and touched a tree and made tea and cleaned the house and it helped a little. it did.#but i just feel like everything takes this constant conscious effort and it’s soooo tiringgggggg i just want to rest#i want to let someone else control my brain for a while#sigh#okay i’m done i just needed to scream about it for a moment#there are places to go and things to paint and songs to listen to#i will keep going. even scared. i just wish i were less scared.
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sooniebby · 8 months
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Based on my random thought (I’ll be sprinkling what he’ll say in the actual fic, this is just a little sneak peak!)
“Usually my other clients can handle more than one pose—but it looks like you’re thinking about my cock instead, huh? Such a slutty boy… well, go on. Don’t get shy now. It’s your own time you’re wasting.”
Imagine having a yoga instructor who seems a bit rude and stand offish during his classes. He doesn’t talk except when giving instructions. It’s mainly for work, that’s all.
Even in his more… sexual side of work, he doesn’t feel much else. Except when he fucks you <3
Something about your whiny moans. The way you practically scream when he slams his cock inside of you. How you try to answer his questions even when the only sounds coming out of your mouth are moans.
He loves manhandling you. At first it was just to make you do different yoga poses—now he just loves seeing how easy he can control you. He’s grip is always harsh, wanting to make sure he leaves some time of mark on your body as your tight heat takes in his cock so easily.
“You can suck better than that, baby… don’t piss me off, alright?”
He loves it whenever you whimper, whining about how harsh he was treating you. But you knew the safe word—you just never said it. His smacks against your butt, tight grip on your waist… most instructors don’t kiss their clients, their own little golden rule. He follows it but makes up for it by biting you all over.
Leg, arm, stomach, neck, shoulder. Nothings safe. You always took them well. It’s like you were made for him. His perfect boy~
“Don’t muffle yourself. Everyone else is fucking and you can hear their moans. Let them hear your whiny voice, baby. Everyone should know how good I’m fucking you.”
He almost feels sad when the session is over. And the next day when he’s fucking his other client, all he can think of is you. Your moans. Your screams. His name on your tongue. You, you, you…
Damn, he was screwed. This wasn’t just work anymore.
wowowow! This was fun to write, and actually helped me develop my OC for this prompt more! This for male/trans masc reader if you couldn’t tell!
The character’s name is Tatsumi Yuta, if anyone cared lol. I’ll be writing the actual fic soon!! Im excited to do so. Feedback appreciated, and ask if you wanna be tagged once I publish chapter 1! (Yes it’s gonna be a series)
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princessbrunette · 26 days
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kitty!reader had been curbing the craving for a tantrum all day.
jj had been tolerant — bless his soul. the attitude you’d been holding onto was lethal, huffing and puffing at any chance with the most poisonous tongue all because he’d woken you up from a nap for seemingly no other reason that ‘let’s go hang with the pogues today!’
you didn’t want to hang with the pogues. you wanted to take a nap and continue drooling on your boyfriends arm.
his patience only lasts so long, and before you know it he’s trying to have it out with you — get to the root of the issue so he could solve whatever problem it was that had you like this. as the conversation unfolds, he starts to realise that you’d caused all this commotion purely because you were tired.
“like — if i acted the way you’re actin’ right now everytime i was tired, babe — john b would’a smacked the shit out’a me by now. okay? i need you to like get it together or something. damn.” he rants, whipping off his hat as he steps into your bedroom to run a hand through matted blonde hair.
you feel that familiar irritation bubble up in your chest at his response. “you’re being so mean, jayj. you literally hate me.” you have nothing left in the tank but meaningless jabs and it was clear — your boyfriend rolling his eyes with a smirk. “don’t tell me to get it together.”
“first of all shut up. second of all yeah, i could have been nicer but you did call me an asshole for suggesting you take a nap. an asshole.” he’s quick to reiterate.
“i already explained why i can’t do that.” you frown, crossing your arms over your chest.
“and it makes no sense. but whatever.” he shrugs. unable to control yourself anymore, you all but growl — shoving and smacking at his chest a couple of times before backing off. “oh that’s what you wanna do, mama? alright.” he laughs. laughs at you — and you only get more mad.
you stand on your tiptoes to really get in his face, eyes thinning with a deadly glare (or what you thought was deadly, he thought you looked like a pissed off kitten.) “fuck. you.” it’s practically a challenge, and when you turn away to storm off — you go absolutely nowhere, jj’s thick arm wrapping around your neck and dragging you back to press his body to yours.
“if you insist, sourpuss. your words, not mine.” he starts to ruck up your skirt, kicking your legs open. you mewl, still angry and whiny and even fight him a little bit but he only grips you tighter, lowering his body and bringing his lips to your ear.
“i dunno what’s got into you kittycat but you’re pissin’ me off. if you ain’t gonna drop that attitude im gonna have to force it out of you. that seem fair?” he threatens as his fingers stroke over the material of your panties making your knees buckle just a little. “think that answers my question. this all you needed?” jj snickers meanly.
approximately seven minutes later and he’s still holding you just like that, but you’re barely able to hold yourself up. with the speed at which his fingers are fucking you, there are loud squelching sounds filling the room alongside your own whines. you’d practically melted into his body, teary eyes squeezed shut as he brutally fucks an orgasm out of you.
“shit, bae — all that talkin’ before and now you can’t say a word. s’what you get when you let papa j take all that stress away, huh?”
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flowersforvi · 1 month
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sub!ellie riding your strap, refusing to touch her until she makes herself cum ohhh my god she gets so whiney and desperate cause she can’t make herself cum the way you can:((
i love u anon. thank u for requesting this im gonna go insane.
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els loves riding you always, but she hates when you refuse to touch her until she cums by herself first. she has her face buried into your neck, arms wrapped around your waist, letting out the cutest muffled moans n whines.
poor girl can’t even control her own hips, she’s just moving them at a random pace, attempting to catch her clit on anything to ease the ache in her cunt.
she’s so frustrated. you haven’t touched her this entire time, and that’s all she wants right now. she doesn’t even care that she has the pleasure of riding your strap. she wants you to be in control of her body, and whatever happens to it in this moment.
“oh baby, i can’t— i really can’t do this anymore. just want you to touch me however you want.”
you look up at her with half lidded eyes, and without saying anything, she knows you won’t touch her. you told her you wouldn’t unless she came first.
“no, i told you to do something, didn’t i? are you gonna sit here n pout like a fuckin’ brat, or are you gonna make yourself cum?”
in response all she can do is tilt her head back, mouth opened slightly, letting out a small huff of disappointment, and get back to work.
ellie knew she wasn’t gonna cum tonight, not unless you touched her.
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mysticdarling · 1 year
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Calling them by their real name - part 2 (spicy)
Characters: venti, xiao, scaramoche (genshin impact!)
Warnings: established relationship, NSFW, breeding., biting, n!pple stimulation, primal, exhibitionism, penetration, smut, no pronouns used for the reader, NO MINORS.
(A/n): hello again, miss me? I apologize for my absence and im happy to announce this long awaited part i turly hope you enjoy your time with my naughty boys~ hope it was worth the long wait! Ps. (I suggest you read the first part first)
_
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Venti
The evening grew darker you didn't know if you should hide or just give up and hope he has Mercy. "Maybe he can only find me where the wind can reach…hmm where could I go without wind?" You talked your thoughts aloud as you walked around, enjoying the scenery of Monstadt. You came across a nice wooded area still feeling the soft Breeze, only getting more anxious by the moment. 
You wander a while on the brink of giving up hope before coming across a cave, which seemed to be empty, only harboring a put out campfire. It was a perfect place to hide out for a while so you did. You walked in no breeze to be felt not even a draft. 
The night began to brew and since you figured you would be there a while, you lit the fire and sat next to the controlled flames. So what if a Hilichurl was to wonder by, you escaped Barbados!…….so you thought at least. 
In a flash of a second a cool gust of wind found its way inside extinguishing the flames.
" oh Windling~ you truly didn't think you could hide from me in my own Nation right? I had fun acting as if I couldn't find you ehe!" You jump just from the sound of his voice, it making your skin crawl.
Venti got into the cave with you without hesitation or invitation taking a bite from an apple he  must have picked from a passing tree. "Me hiding?! Psshh noo i was just…Exploring! Yes that"
Venti busted out in laughter "I'm a god remember you cant lie to me windblume, more importantly I'm your boyfriend I would see before it left your tongue, speaking of your tongue I could think of a lot of places I want it to be right now" He flirted his eyes gazing you up and down.
"Venti!? Geez must you be such a pervert" You grumbled pulling his hat down over his face, soon feeling his slender hand grip your wrist. Venti pushed you down cradling the back of your head as he lays you back getting on top of you. " I've been looking forward to this my disciple, I almost immediately wanted to come running after you even before the rich wine reached to my lips" He pulled at the bow around his neck untying it  letting his cape fall to the ground. He started at your face cupping it softly before his hands wandered, taking in the beauty of every inch of you.  It wasn't long before he had you in nearly nothing at all, the way he looked, touched, made all your insecurities melt away. " Tell me Traveler do you think all of Monstadt could hear you if i make you loud enough?" he slipped off his shorts leaving the stockings, rubbing his rosy tip against your entrance.
You stared up at your bard, it was very clear you weren't speaking to him anymore no, you were talking to a god. "Venti maybe not here what if Adventures walk by or-" Your words were cut short, venti sinking himself inside with no remorse, an unexpected gasp escaping your lips. Your walls swallowed him whole, taking every inch of him as if your body was made for it. "Venti!" You moaned out only to be cut off once again by the bards chuckle.
" Oh windblume I don't want to hear that now call me by my name it sounds so beautiful coming from your lips" He leaned down whispering in your ear, the ends of his braids starting to glow against you. "Say it for me please my beloved" Venti begged, his breath against your neck sending chills down your spine. It was strange it was still your venti but his voice was different, serious, ethereal, too perfect for this world and the whole of tayvat. You felt your face burn with a blush as you turned your face away from the God of freedom "Barbados….my lord… BarbADOS!" It was as if something snapped inside Venti he wanted to defile his disciple. So he did, his hips struck you like lightning noises and moans filling the cave. Even as he was fucking into you Venti Whined in the orgasmic pleasure of your warmth. you couldn't tell which of you were louder.
"That's right, sing for me!" Venti relished in making such a mess out of you
"Mghh! W-Windblume… windblume.. ah! Y/N!!" With every word Venti's voice strained higher. He gripped the back of your thighs folding you to hit the most unholy spots inside you, it nearly made you melt into nothing. Your abdomen tenses reaching the highest point of climax before completely relishing in the finishing feeling. Venti wasn't close behind. He filled your every office before collapsing onto you panting with a huge grin on his face. He laid Apon your chest keeping his seed trapped inside you not daring to pull quite yet. " Now that is how you worship a God ehe"
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Xiao
You ran to Liyue as you near the border from the neighboring nation, clearly excited to see your darling yaksha. Once you finally step foot you notice a dark figure, Xiao breathing heavily staring at the ground. This only causes you to hurry to worry filling your face. " Xiao? Is that you are you feeling oka-" Your words stop, in a blur Xiao tackling you in the grass. He stared down at you his fingers digging into the ground next to you. "xiao i-its okay now its me im here" you slowly removed his mask it disapping in your hands. " I'm ok...i didnt harm you did i?" Xiao put a hand against his head, making him shutter. "Y/n is it really you…. I'm not seeing things right…" He places the hand on your cheek feeling the warmth, his thumb pressing your lips, letting out a breath of full relief " i…i missed your visits and company" Before the golden eyed boy could continue you tugged him down by his necklace, pressing your lips against his, the kiss desperate, rough, feeling the shared breaths.
Xiao pulled back only when you both were breathless. " say my name" your lips parted "no my real name" His pleading eyes was enough to make you melt where you laid "Alatus" xiao couldn't hold back his blush, he trailed down your sides gripping the fabric before ripping it open finding you so beautiful exsposed under the moon. Xiao stared at you for reassurance with each touch before grabbing a hold of your wrist dragging your hand against his own chest his heart racing .
With a smile, your hands wandered down hooking a finger on his pants tugging them down  honestly surprised at his mere girth, but Xiao didn't leave you much time to think before he folded you. He Threw your leg over his shoulder, dragging his tip against your awaiting hole. "Y/n Please stop me.  If you don't stop me now I don't think I'll be able to"
Self-control was leaving his body as he spoke his golden eyes dilated and targeted on you. " I trust you Alatus-" As those words escaped your lips xiao rammed his cock inside. All at once you felt his teeth sinking into the of your shoulder trying to muffling himself. He was a rough lover not that he always meant to be but he couldn't control it, all he does for his life is fight for control so with you tends to accidentally let loose a little too much. His blows were merciless as he pounded into you under the night sky, grunting and panting with every move it all dissolving into pleasure.
"Alatus A..Alatus don't stop p-please don't stop" Xiao rutted inside you gritting his teeth as he came filling your needy hole. 
His cock twitched from the over stimulation but not daring to stop. Whining and shuddering with every movement "wouldnt…Gh! Dream of it." He hunched over you not daring to stop his hips for a second, even with his seed pouring out of you from around him.
Xiao was so worked up he was even overstimulating himself refusing to let it end as he jerked and whined his length twitching like crazy inside of you. Beads of sweat dripped down his neck, fucking you so hard his hips slapped against your ass making the most obscene sounds even after you did finish, Xiao still couldn't persuade himself to stop. He needed it, he desperately wanted to fill every orifice of you and by the time he did stop he did fill up every bit of your sore little hole. That night he was especially attentive, carrying you to his room in the inn, wiping you down with a warm rag. He served you for the rest of the night, whatever you may ask he will provide. Xiao made sure to remind you, all you need do is say his name. Even the one that was Heaven to his ears as it escaped your lips.
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Scaramoche
Scaramouche grabbed your hand leading you to an old abandoned inazuma house. The house was pretty well preserved, apart from the few leaks in the roof and the smell of dust. "we should rest here. I'll get a fire going" Scara removed his hat a little doll falling out, you stared at it then looked up him "what a cute doll! it looks like you, did you make it?" You ask curious, him clearly trying to brush it off as he picks it up. "It's just a stupid doll. Don't think much of it." He shoved it in his sleeve huffing turning away. "...hey kuni i would love to look after him for you, so he doesn't fall into the fire" He froze for a moment before grabbing the plush doll out of his sleeve placing it in your hands. "You wouldn't have liked me.." He said quietly looking at the doll in your palms.
What?"
"You wouldn't have liked kunikazushi, he was gentle, he dressed in silks and was naive to the world. Me and you both know you like when I'm rough with you" Scara looked up at you from his eyebrows, his head still tilted down.
" I think I would enjoy seeing your soft side, I would love if you showed me"you cupped his face his eyes softening.
"In your dreams."  he said in a snarky tone, but with his height you picked him up with ease, setting him on the creaky but stable table. "ah! Hey what the hell do you think you're doing!?" Scaramouche struggled, clearly not used to being lifted off his feet.... by someone else "I want to see you every part of you kunikazushi please show me" you plead really making it hard for the puppet to refuse.
All at once he gripped your hair staring at you with a threatening glare. "y/n if you tell a single soul i swear no one ALIVE will believe you" He glared, you nodding in response.
Scaramouche relaxed becoming completely tender as he brought your hand to his cheek nuzzling against the palm " I love you  and I never want you to abandon me even if you grow to hate me please stay by my side" Scaramouche looked away almost embarrassed of himself, all while you melt like putty in his hands. "Could i touch you more y/n? I want to ingrain every inch of you into my mind so I'll know that I met someone as perfect as you" Scara eyes trailed over every inch of you, slowly dragging his hands down to your neck and then shoulders soon replacing his soft cold hands with kisses. He admired your whole body as if it was complex art, all the way down to your toes leaving a soft kiss as a pure act of humble adoration.
He stood a hand clasping your top. " I want to explore more will you let me?" once you gave him the okay he lifted your shirt dragging his soft tongue against the bud of your nipple. He captured it in-between his lips, suckling on as he stared up at you innocently, you so focused on the stimulation you didn't notice the Wanderer seemed to have switched places with you, he sat you displayed on the table. It was clear Scaramouche was starting to get more worked up then he originally meant to. He layed you back his hips so desperate whines escaping his parted lips as he grinded himself against you, not even able to wait until he gets you fully unclothed.
Not like you were complaining, his tent causing enough friction to your sex to make you enjoy it, Hooking a leg around scara waist. Especially with the adorable noises he made causing you to unshamefully move your hips against it only getting more shutters and whines from him.
He gazed down inbeween, a blush filling his face watching you pleasure yourself on his hard on a wet spot  soon growing on to his shorts.
"Aww kuni you got yourself dirty its a good thing you don't wear those silks any more" you pull his shorts down with one swift movement his length springing out still painfully hard leaking pathetic amounts of precum.
Scara's embarrassed face only worked you up by the second, you didn't know if he was suppressing it or if he's really good at acting, but his innocence unleashed something deep inside of you.
You guided his cock unable to wait a minute more, his hands covering his face peeking through his fingers as he watches his cock sink inside whining from the tightness that surrounds him making him hunch over the pleasure overwhelming the poor little puppet. "Mm oh kuni  does it feel good?" You bit your lip clearly knowing the answer, watching his ears even start to turn red as he nods fast. Scara placed his hands on either side of you moving his hips at a comfortable pace. "i-is this okay y/n im not hurting you am i?" You shake your head in  response to wrapped up in the feeling struggling to even keep your eyes from rolling back. Scaramouche continued both of your noises nearly drowning out by each other. He hid himself into your neck, causing him to bury himself into the silky walls with no remorse  making sure you feel every inch of his member inside of your needy hole. a gasp escaped your lips unable to even scold him finding his embrace so soft and sweet, even if he's playing it off as a innocent moment with no Sinister ulterior motive.
Scaramouche's breasts were heavy against your neck he couldn't help but rut himself into you barely even letting himself pull out before pushing back, not wanting to leave your warmth for a second.
You were starting to get unbelievably close and you could tell by the way scara shuttered in your arms he wasn't too far behind. You couldn't help it you reached your Edge your abdomen tensing. " s-something's happening i don't think i can stop.. I can't hold on… please take all of it" with one loud yelp he released painting your insides with his cum so sensitive he's teary-eyed. Once you come down from the high you slowly wipe a tear that happened to make it to his cheek smiling like an idiot " you're so cute kunikazushi" As if on cue Scaramouche rolled his eyes burying his face in your chest "oh shut it." He grumbled as you tangle your hand into his hair. " welcome back scara"
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ghosty1111 · 2 years
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i can only cry in dreams. and it feels good,just as i remember it being. but i dont think it helps my body when i wake up. ):
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ratskcoreddie · 1 year
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the only thing on my mind right now is steve harrington being pussy drunk, filth under the cut 18+
this cant end.
your laying flat on your tummy, one of your knees is bent at your side so you can prop your ass up high for the man behind you. steve is fucking you slow and steady. his palm is flat on your ankle, fingers curling around it and squeezing every few seconds to bring himself back to earth. steve slows and pulls out, till only half of him remains inside of you. delaying the release of his impending orgasm. you’ve both been like this for an hour. him pulling out halfway and cock warming you to feel every twitch you supply him. he waits until he catches his breath. then he can’t fight it anymore and his hips jerk, causing him to sink back in. he burrows himself to the hilt.
“oh fucckk”, he groans. “th- this.. fucking pussy is perfect for me.. baby”. steve’s abdomen flexes. “you’re.. you’re gonna make me c— cum… soon m’promise.. ill give it to you”.
you feel every ridge of his length. the curve of his cock is so delicious. it’s been hitting that one spot only he can reach over and over making you delirious. you’re already so desperate and needy to be filled with one of his loads. you’ve been begging for it under him. the promise of it coming soon fuels your desire. he squeezes your ankle tighter.
“i— i love this cunt.. im gonna fill you up“ he hisses, “shit.. i w… i just wanna stay like this. fuck. oh fucck… for a little bit longer”.
he wont shut up. each of his praises he moans working down to your core and soaking him perfectly. he can’t take his eyes off of the slick coat your leaving all over him. wet, sloppy, messy, sticky, dirty. and sinful. the sight almost makes him lose it. you pulse around him and he drives deeper into you. you feel every single movement and your third orgasm is hurling towards you. faster than his first. you understand his issue. you could stay like this forever too. under him, where you belong. but the satisfaction of feeling your core snap around him again blinds you with a white light. he pulls out. you suck him back in. steve groans while he takes a slow drag out.
“im.. im so close”, you whimper. steve growls “bab.. baby hold it.. god, please. ju- just.. i wanna stay inside a little longer. you’re so pretty like this. shit. you’re gripping me baby..”.
he tries to argue, knowing that if he feels you cum around him he’d topple over his ledge. this cant end. he wont let it end. he squeezes your ankle tighter and completely stills. only giving you half of him. steve throws his head back when you let out a whine that sounds raspy. your throat being destroyed from his earlier abuse. you thrash under him. having enough of the slow push and pull of him. it wasn’t his fault, he didn’t mean to be a tease. he was just so enamored with the feeling of you that he was completely unaware that he’s been edging you of your releases for his own selfishness.
you throw you ass back onto him taking all of him. before he can pull away your speeding up your hips. desperately moving them up and down on his length. the motion send his hurdling over you. instantly digging himself deeper and letting you work against him to control the pace you need to achieve your end.
“oh. fuck! fuckk!” he cries.
he’s whining and trying to stay still to allow you to keep your tempo and hold himself back at the same time. this can’t end. your body is meeting his without permission. steve reaches down to grab your hips and lets you do the work for him. you move methodically while he grips onto your skin for desperation. this can’t end. his whole body shutters and you feel him twitch inside you. before you feel his release filling you up, his mouth is letting you know what’s to come.
“baby.. ple..please” he whimpers, trying to go back to how it was before, but when he feels your body tense up for him.. he’s a goner.
“i— fuck! babybabybaby ..i’m cumming!”
all good things must come to an end.
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atyourmerci · 2 months
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† Salvation †
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Read pt.1 and pt.2
Summary: finale of repent series! Drabble of abby and readers life after abby comes to terms with her sexuality. Happy ever after lesbos<3
Warnings: smut, MDNI, switch!abby, switch!reader, religion play of course, strap usage, refers to strap as cock, cunnilingus, overstimulation, bondage, smnophilia, dirty talk yurrrr, some fluff
A/N: thank you so much for all of the love on this series!! Religious guilt/trauma is a tricky subject and I’m glad that I was able to portray it in a light that most of you could relate or sympathize with. And yall im so bad at writing fluff that’s why this is so short lmao that’s why I only write smut. I’m so excited to write through more niche experiences and topics. Love you like always<3
That night was nothing like the first. Your God showed mercy, wrapping your cold, shaky body with cloth and carrying you to where it all started.
This time she held you and never left, she was there was the sun came beaming down, drying out your soaked hair. While you were asleep she had removed her cross and strung it along your neck. Maybe there was no need hold a token of a god she had already met, maybe she wanted everyone else to know- you never cared to question her antics.
After your mission had ended she immediately broke things off with Owen, reclaimed herself within the community. And she for one took no shit with the commentary from anyone about the two of you. Her life mission was to protect you at all costs now, you were all she knew. She wouldn’t leave your side anymore. Anything you did she made sure she was there to protect you, she wouldn’t put your life in anyone else’s hands but her own.
There was a lot of things you had to teach Abby, and by teach, that meant showing her with your legs wide open. On a mission you both were sent out on to look for resources you ran across a run down sex shop. You found a girthy dildo with black leather straps, it was bigger than anything you’d ever taken but with the look of excitement on Abby’s face you couldn’t say no to her. You told her you could use it on her but she insisted on fucking you right there over the counter at the dusty sex shop. She wasted no time dragging your pants down to your ankles and ripping your panties seams to get inside, ”I’d tell you to suck my cock first but you’re so fucking wet already, how bad have you wanted this,hmmm?” She promised she’d go slow, walking you through it, “fuck you’re doing so good, taking me so well for your first time.” After your pain had been replaced with sheer pleasure she couldn’t hold back anymore, pumping into you so hard there was sure to be bruises all over your hips. After abusing your hole for an hour for her own amusement she finally let you cum while drawing circles around your swollen clit as she pounded deep and slow thrust into you. you were so cockdrunk she had to carry you back to the truck and finish the mission herself, it went by quickly as she imagined things she could do to you next with her cock.
She loved showering with you at night, she never let you lift a finger, washing your body gently after sneaking in the strap into the showers. Maybe it was because she learned how to fuck you in the showers that it made her so dominant in that environment. She wouldn’t let you touch her in there even after you begged her while she pinned your arms against the wall, overstimulating your clit over and over again until she was done with you. After she’d run you a bath and hold your fragile body as she ran soapy strips up and down your bruised skin, making sure to kiss every inch so that never missed an atom of your being.
Abby only regressed back into her old ways when she let you take complete control. She’d let you tie her to the bed you shared edging her till she was in tears, babbling prayers to climax. You’d tie her cross necklace around her clit and tug on it while you used your tongue to fuck her dripping hole. You’d only let her cum after she got on her knees like a whore eating away at your cunt while you shamed her for her sins.
Your life with abby wasn’t like anything you’d ever experienced before, but there was no before her, or after her. There was only your god, and hers.
Maybe she had still repented for her sins, maybe she had reached salvation at the mercy of your own sins.
Taglist: @wishbones999 @bookpagecandlescent @littlegingerperson2 @lanafresitas @lookforthelight1 @fict1onallyobsessed
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sprout-fics · 11 months
Note
dunno if imissed thurs thots bc time zone is an arse but i pilled an allnighter and needed some smit to keep going bc coffeee aint doing it job anymore so heres a copy paste of my idea from when i was actuallyawake
hallo! so taking a page from the spider verse movie, what if reader did yell out a safeword? there is an “aftercare for a red moment” hole in the fic community (or im just blinded by the algorithm who knows)
So this is a really interesting concept, and also a good way to discuss proper sex practices, so thank you anon!
For those unaware, the color system (Green, yellow, red) is typically associated with BDSM practices. Green is all clear, yellow is slow down/change tactics, and red is full stop, change into aftercare mode. However this system is not exclusively designed for kink related practices, it can be a useful tool for even vanilla sex. Please remember to always check in with your partners and obtain enthusiastic consent before engaging in sexual activities. I am not an expert in this area, so please remember to do your own independent research if you are curious about this topic.
(Warning: Uncomfortable sexual scenarios and use of safe words, please read at your own discretion)
The Color Red
(TF 141 reacting to you using a safe word during sex)
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Johnny 'Soap' MacTavish
You’re not really sure what does it, but something inside you drops abruptly, without warning as Soap’s hand wraps around your throat. 
There’s not even any pressure, just a heavy grasp that circles under your jaw but it’s enough to make something in you rise in panic, blood chilling and breath seizing inside your chest
He’s still hunches over you, your legs wrapped around his hips, brow scrunched in pleasure, voice dragging as he tries to angle himself just right to graze against the soft spongy part of you he knows will make you go boneless in his arms
Whatever pleasure was tightening low across your hips dies as a cold, fearful wash of dread takes its place, the world spinning as you drop fast.
“Red.” You croak, voice trembling, abruptly, entire body going rigid with panic.
It’s over in an instant. Soap knows what the word means, is trained to respond at the first instinct of discomfort, and within a blink his hand is gone, his weight off of you
You curl over onto your side, eyes wide and shoulders trembling, wetness still on the inside of your thighs but air rising sharply as hyperventilation threatens to take over
Soap’s weight is off the bed, giving you space, but when he notices your breathing he kneels beside you at once, eyes brimming with worry
“Hen, sweetheart, it’s alright.” He coos softly, words echoing as a steady stream, a reminder to his nearby presence. “You’re safe, we’re done. Breathe for me, You’re alright.”
“Johnny.” You gasp, reaching for him, and he obliges instantly, maneuvering you both so he sits against the headboard and puts your head into his lap, positioning a pillow underneath it. 
“I’m here.” He reminds you, a hand stroking along your shoulder in soothing circles as you try to control your breathing, listening to him breathe alongside you. Deep inhale, hold for 4, out for 7. Repeat.
“What do you need, hen?” He asks after a few minutes, after the panic has faded to a dull bite, once you stop shuddering and instead curl into an exhausted heap at his side.
You sigh out a shuddering exhale, feel his thumb graze across the top of your shoulder. Gentle, patient, devoted.
“You, Johnny.” You tell him at last. “Just you.”
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Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick
“Red.”
You gasp it out unexpectedly in Gaz’s bed, hands secured above your head as he bends over you, three fingers curling inside you, smug smile plastered over his face as he tries to wring another orgasm from you despite you telling him you can’t, and him finding another, another anyways
Now, however, it’s finally too much, and when he presses just right the sensation it summons is less pleasurable and more aching, stretching an overworn muscle that leaves something twisting unpleasantly inside you
“Oh shit, doll.” He gasps at the word, and slowly withdraws his fingers to not cause you additional discomfort. You whine, but the sound catches in your throat, pleading and tender. “I’m sorry, shh, take a breath for me.”
He reaches up above you, pulls at the rope and it comes loose easily, allows your hands to sink into the pillows and reduces the strain on your shoulders. 
“Hey, hey, I got you.” He murmurs as you shudder, face contorting at the unpleasant ache inside you
He drags you into his arms, and you don’t complain at all, curling into his steady frame as he tucks you against his chest
“You did good.” He tells you at once, reassuring, gentle. “Promise you did good. Just take your time.”
You nuzzle against the coarse, curly hair of his chest, feel him stroke a hand against your back as the ache inside you dies to a low murmur
“I’m okay.” You tell him after a few minutes, taking all the time you need to fully relax into his embrace “It just…it was so much.”
Kyle exhales then, a breath you didn’t realize had been holding. His form goes a little lax against you, relieved by your words
“I’m sorry, doll.” He tells you at once. “I should have stopped sooner.”
You shake your head a little, remind him gently “That’s what the colors are for. I’m alright, just-” and you wince. “Tender.”
You feel him smile into your hair, mouth tugging just an inch, his body warm, solid, reaffirming against yours
“We can fix that.” He tells you softly. “How about I run you a bath and get you cleaned up, hmm?”
You nod, pause, and then crane your head up to plant a kiss against his lips
“Sounds wonderful.”
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Simon 'Ghost' Riley
Sex with Simon can usually be an intense, emotional affair, an experience where you try and carve space within each other through touch, seeking a balm to the brokenness, soothing to the fear and hurt 
Yet there are also times when you both just need release
Which is where you are now, face down, his hands hauling yours behind your back, hips slapping against your pelvis with a rapid, brutal intensity that’s going to leave you pleasantly sore for days
His voice is a grinding, rumbling presence that doesn’t allow you to drift entirely off, forcing you back into the presence of him. A hand tangles in your hair, presses you down into the sheets as he growls lewd, filthy praise down at you
Yet there’s a hint of malice to it, and normally you’d welcome it, send it right back to him, teeth bared and spirit a bright flame that burns against his darkness
Now, however, each word seems to puncture through you, as he hisses ‘Slut. Pretty little whore.’ down at you
You want to take it, want it to feed the coiling need as he buries himself inside you, but tonight it sounds almost like Simon means it.
It hurts.
It forces you to drop so fast it gives you whiplash, mind reeling and you have to remind yourself to say the word that bleeds across your tongue.
“Red.”
Simon stops instantly, removes his hand from your hair like he’s been burned.
You barely even notice, caught in your own turmoil of thoughts, trying to find your way out of the labyrinth. You don’t even notice as he pulls out from you, but the sudden emptiness only feeds the fall, makes a sob curl in your throat as you try and fail to swallow it down
He’s gone from the bed, you notice, and if anything it makes you panic more.
“S-Simon.” He try, voice wavering, and as if you’ve summoned him he appears back at your side, his voice gentler now but strained, guilty
“Here, pet.” A hand against your spine, a feathering touch given only as a mild offering before you give him permission to touch you, to which you gasp “Please.”
The touch becomes firmer, fingers pulling at the rigidness coiled in your frame, and after a moment there’s the cool touch of a washcloth that wipes the sweat from your skin.
“Y-you didn’t mean it, did you?” You try at last, not moving yet, knowing he’d only hush you back into stillness, make sure you didn’t push yourself too fast too soon
Simon takes a moment to process, realization washing over him at why you invoked your color.
“No, never.” He tells you, voice a little distant, and you know the faint unhappiness that colors his own voice isn’t for you but for him, tearing at himself for causing you hurt
You take care of him too, knot your fingers between his in tender reassurance, reminding him that even as he hovers at your side, you stay beside him too
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Captain John Price
You’re trying to soldier through it, the pain that wraps around your thigh as he hauls it over his shoulder, braces it on the broad planes of his frame
Your hands are fisted in the sheets, chest heaving as Price forces his tongue into your cunt, fingers digging red marks into your opposite leg. There’s pleasure coiling n your core with every stripe of his tongue, dragging whimpering moans from your throat
It’s soured, however, by the wrapping on your thigh, the stitched bullet hole radiating pain. The sharp ache drowns any potential pleasure that rises inside you and you try to grit your teeth against it, force it down in pursuit of the warmth of price’s breath against your folds
You can’t. You can’t do it, not with tears beginning to well in your eyes and the sounds coming from transitioning into whimpers of pain. 
“John.” You manage, strained, and for a moment Price is so absorbed in his task he almost doesn’t hear you. “J-John, red. Red.”
Price’s head shoots up, his ears attuned to that word specifically, and when he does you see slick coating his chin, his eyes flickering brightly in worry.
A sob bursts from your chest at the sight, dragging with pain, eyes hot and wet as you press a hand to the red blossoming bandage. 
He surmises the situation quickly, and instantly he’s rising off you, nearly vanishing from you entirely, giving you a bit of space before sitting back down beside you and gently bending your leg onto his lap
“Shh, it’s alright love.” He reassures you, a hand reaching up to stroke at your sweaty forehead, against your brow bunched in worry. “I’ve got you, you’re alright.”
“I’m sorry.” You blurt out even as his fingers knead into your calf. “I didn’t- it hurts.”
“Never apologize for using your colors.” The captain tells you sternly, and he holds your eyes on him, levying you with a disciplining stare that ensures your compliance. You nod, sniffling, and it makes some of the grimness melt from his eyes, tendered with affection
“Where are your pain meds?” He asks then, a hand gently tracing over the bloodied bandage, and you nod to the bedside drawer.
He nods absently, one hand still braced on your leg, the other reaching past you to withdraw the bottle from the assembly of items there
“You’re going to take these.” He tells you without question, drawing your gaze back to him once more. “We’ll get you cleaned up, and then get something warm in your stomach so they go down sunny, yes?”
You sniffle and nod at him, still feeling a little embarrassed, still in pain. Yet it’s softer now with his touch as his eyes turn to you fondly.
“Might even get you some hair of the dog for good measure.” He offers, and it at last summons a shy but warm smile from you
------
Again, if your partner every signals they are uncomfortable during sex, stop, talk, and proceed as needed. If anyone ever disrespects you signaling you are uncomfortable or blatantly ignores your safeword, do not engage with them further. Stay safe, stay sane, and stay consensual
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quirklessidiot · 5 months
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title: Y/N and her boys [sneak peek] pairing : Upper classman/popular kid!Gojo Satoru x F!reader, Exchange student!Eren Jaeger x F!reader, MMA Fighter/Celebrity!Ryomen Sukuna x F!reader, Childhood Bestfriend!Aki Hayakawa x F!reader, Varsity football player!Itoshi Rin x F!reader (use of she/her pronouns) Genre: Alternate Universe-University setting, romance, fluff, angst (if you squint), slice of life, drama, all cliche romance genres unite! (Based on the Manhwa, Bunny and her Boys)
Summary: Y/N’s denied the existence of pretty boys and god forbid she’d ever end up dating one yet with one horrid break-up, she decides that relationships aren’t just meant for someone stupid like her but the problem is — five of them suddenly appear and god, why does it seem like they can’t get enough of her?
General warning for the story: mild sexual content, cliche tropes (help), mahito is his own warning, minor character death, mentions of depression, a lot of second-hand embarrassment from y/n's part (shes not a cool girl, SHE IS A BUBBLING MESS AND THATS OK <33), insecurities, bullying, and mentions of cheating Notes: english isn't my first language! (dont judge me) this multi-chaptered story will probably be 20-30 chapters (idk) in ao3. you can totally tell this story is rooted from self-indulgence LMFAO. Im not sure if i should cross post it but im leaning towards ao3 more either ways, can't wait to release this on friday!
also can u guess who she ends up with :P rb’s are appreciated yay FULL VERSION IS RIGHT HERE!
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SNEAK PEAK
“Maybe…Maybe we should break up.”
There's another round of silence between you two, and you know that you can’t exactly take it back anymore since you had said it loud and clear, “Woah, woah, I told you I wasn’t with Misa.” his voice turns louder, and the background noises are good as gone as if he had left the noisy place, “Where are you? I’m coming to get you-”
“I said,” you try to control the stammering of your voice, trying to avoid the stares of the people who cast odd glances, “We’re done. I don’t want to see or hear from you again.” and before he could let another excuse out of his mouth, you end the call. It is only now that you notice how your legs have been quivering and your mouth has gone dry, seemingly like a pup who had just been born and trying to walk. You lose your footing and sit down on the dirty pavement.
No tears were shed at that very moment, probably because you were only stupefied, and it was written clearly on your face that this wouldn’t be something you’d recover anytime soon. Heck, you couldn’t even grasp the idea entirely that someone you’ve been friends with for years and, eventually, a lover would do that to you.
Was it as easy as a snap of a finger?
“Miss? Miss?” someone calls out, but it only bounces back to him like an echo in a cave. You remain still, eyes blinking rapidly while the rest of your face is slack. Everyone around you continued to move, but you remained there like a decorated statue.
“Miss? Christ, you’re about to be–” the husky voice also stops, and it’s only now that you look up to find a man. He seems stocky but, simultaneously, smaller, as if he didn’t want to come off as intimidating when he maintained eye-to-eye contact. 
He is incongruous with everyone who walks by since he desperately tries to hide his features with a baseball cap and a dark face mark. The only thing you can see are strands of his bleached hair, his eyes that resemble the sunshine that peeked through the glasses of whiskey, and the swirls of ink becoming visible underneath his coat when he stretches out his arm.
If this were any other day, you’d run in the opposite direction because he looked like an unscrupulous loan shark, but your body remains in a state of unknown fatigue that you just wanted to stay still. 
You watch as his face softens, the lines on his forehead somewhat disappearing when he watches the color bleed from your face. “...Alright…” he stops, squinting as he crouches to your level. His thick thighs encompass the rough expanse of his straight jeans, and you wondered if he had been an athlete or something. Aside from his built, his presence was rather invigorating,  “oh…” he continues, “Sorry, you-uh…” The confidence he had to throw you off is gone like the evening dust as he motions his index finger up and down his face.
At that moment, you feel something wet running down your cheek. It seemed like the waterworks were late.
You didn’t want to be a pity party in front of anyone, and you’d expect there to be only bystanders, not ‘good samaritans’.
You sniffled, violently wiping the tears away as you felt your ribs were too tight when you took one long breath, “I’m fine…” you respond monotonously.
Who were you even fooling? 
“Right…” you carefully watch him take out a handkerchief, “Fine, sitting on a dirty pavement near my car doesn’t make you look fine, Miss.” he prodded.
“Well, what do you care, anyways?” you tried to keep your voice from cracking, but the stranger showed no qualms of anxiety or fear, nor did he seem mad at your snappy attitude. The blue handkerchief is laid on his palm, waiting for you to take it, yet you exhibit no signs of accepting his kindness. Instead of forcing you through like the usual status quo, he returns it to his pockets.
The odd man.
“Well, for one, I don’t want to run your feet over since I’m parked over here,” he thumbs towards the black jeep that’s parked in front of you, “And my mom didn’t raise me to leave a girl sitting alone, crying her eyes out…”
“Well, did your mom tell you to mind your own business, as well?” your body remains heavy and distant from the stranger, not minding if it came off as rude, but you’ve always been wary of them, especially the ones who claimed to be nice. You wouldn’t be swayed even if you were in a vulnerable place.
He sucks in a deep breath, quite surprised that you had the energy to exchange a vehement response to him. Weren’t you just about to bawl your eyes out?
“Well, you honestly looked like you deserve some niceness after whatever happened.” he conceded, remaining suspiciously friendly, “Piece of advice, though, if it’s a guy, he’s not worth it.” 
“I-what makes you think it’s a guy?” there it goes again, the unknown tightening of your throat and the way the gummy lids on your eyes would heat up as if a pipe of water was about to burst and flood the segways any moment.
“It’s always an asshole who doesn’t seem to know how to treat a woman right.” he lamely explains, and slowly but hesitantly, as if he was waiting for you to move away, he places one hand on top of your hand. 
Unlike a while ago, you weren’t as hostile, but you were confused about why the stranger suddenly did this and didn’t seem to tilt away like you usually would, “So go home tonight, Miss. Cry it out and wake up tomorrow for yourself. You’ll be fine.”
You don’t even see his entire face, but the way he gently caresses your hair as if you were a long-time friend had your lips quivering, and without even realizing it, your torso bends forward. You bury your face in your arms, finding solace in your makeshift fetal position.
The stranger says nothing more; honestly, you didn’t even mind. His newfound presence is comforting.
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polakina · 2 months
Text
how they respond to suggestive texts
call of duty headcanons #6
hc masterlist // masterlist
on an absolute mission to get so much content out rn, my two days off have proved efficient ahaha
rating: explicit
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baffled. was not expecting it at all
he thought he'd have an easy night in doing paperwork in his office until his phone pinged
half expected it to be laswell
damn near dropped his phone when he read the message from you
"i need you, john."
he wasn't used to this sort of advance
he was old school, preferred this sort of thing face to face, but didn't mind straying from his ways of normality
"you need me? well how could i say no to you?"
that was all it ever took, really
he'd always come find you, seeking out what you wanted from him
but it always ended the same way
he'd find you in his bedroom, rolled on your stomach facing the door, waiting for him to enter through it
"need something from me, love? you could have asked."
he could never gauge your texts, what emotion or tone was lurking behind your words
but that's what you liked most about it. the fact he always had to come and find out what you wanted
it could be a favour, it could be a simple question, or it could be this
he saw it in your eyes
"i did ask."
"not really though, hmm?"
he never felt the control of the situation he was used to feeling. not when you had him crawling to your room
"got you here though, didn't i?"
you always had the same smirk on your face when he came striding over to you by the side of the bed, meeting your lips in a kiss as he rolled you over, crawling on top of you
he liked receiving those messages after that
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couldn't respond immediately
had no idea what to say back to you
he just stared at him phone for a few moments
"what are you doing right now? i can't sleep"
he never really responded to these sorts of messages, instead he took the physical action of just coming to you
you classed whatever was happening between you as a sort of casual convenience
a simple text had him coming to knock at your door within minutes
and after that, you went about your day until inevitably sending or receiving a similar message a few nights later
"can't sleep, hmm?" he'd ask, leaning against the door frame of your room on base. a smirk always painted his face, expecting the message at some point in the night. "perhaps i can keep you company."
he knew exactly what you needed
fucking you raw until you couldn't feel your legs anymore
your ass in the air, face pressed against the pillows, hands behind your back and held there with his own wrapped around your wrist
he pounded into you until your voice grew hoarse and your body gave out from under you
the sheets were soaked with your juices, your hair strewn over your face from his unrelenting thrusts, sweat slicking your skin
he didn't stop. not until you were limp under his touch
his free hand held your hip, steadying your body as his hips connected with your ass, slapping roughly against your skin and pulling obscene noises from his throat
"fucking hell, love. i should have come here sooner. would have had more time with you."
wouldn't admit it, but loved it when you messaged for him to come to you
was usually waiting at his phone for it to ping with your name popping up on the screen
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his heart gets all fluttery at stuff like this, not that he would admit it
a big grin on his face that he can't conceal
"come to bed, johnny."
you called him johnny when you missed him. when you needed him
he often worked late in the office, losing track of time
seeing those messages, it brought a soft smile to his face
"im busy, lass. i'll be a while. go to sleep without me."
he never really caught on the first time
nor did he ever really register the meaning behind any of your messages
"i'm not tired."
"then why do you want me to come to bed?"
he could be so fucking thick sometimes
it finally clicked in his head the second he pressed send
"one second, lass." was all you received as a hasty reply before footsteps came running up the stairs
he practically dove on you the second he came into the room
"here now"
you laughed as he kissed your face and neck
"too late now. you missed your chance," you always joked
he was always late to figure it out. and you always said he'd missed his chance
"hmm...well, sweetheart, we'll see if that answer changes when your clothes are on the floor, shall we?"
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liked to make a game of it
your text had him wanting to lock himself in your bedroom and have his way with you, but he restrained himself for a short while first, having fun with it
he played along, wanting to pull a plead out of you before he even thought about coming to satisfy your needs
"i miss you. how long are you going to take?"
he usually stayed late, researching, or sometimes in the armoury detailing his weapons
more often than not, he lost track of time and by the time he was ready to go to bed, it was well past midnight
so your texts usually pulled him out of focus and back to reality
"an hour or so. why, what's up?"
he didn't need to ask. he knew what was up. he always did
"come on, gaz. don't make me say it."
"say it, love."
you hated when he dragged it out. but you loved it at the same time
"i need you."
he always smirked when you finally admitted you needed him. but he liked to play it out even longer, occasionally
he read the message but never replied
it frustrated you, but you carried on
"please, gaz."
that was all he waited for
in the short time it took for him to reach your bunk, you'd have thought he'd ran across the compound
you always found that he was just as needy as you. but he had more patience
his lips were on yours before you'd even managed to close the door behind him
his hands roaming your body, pushing you against the door, hiking you up into his arms, your legs wrapped around his waist
he took you right there and then, pushing your shorts aside, not even bothering to undress you before pushing himself inside you slowly while you adjusted
"you weren't kidding when you said you needed me," he smiled, feeling how easy it was to slip into your wet cunt
he lost all patience for waiting once fully inside you, thrusting his hips against you, his cock hitting that spot inside you that made your thighs tighten around him, locking him in against your body until you both reached your high
"well next time," you smiled, "don't make me wait so long."
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quinn-pop · 7 months
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let’s do some autistic meta knight headcanons!! over explaining my interpretation of meta knight yet again wooooo
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this orb has NO idea how to talk to people!!! outside of work anyway. a lot of this is partially due to upbringing (suppressing his emotions all the time) but he does not know how to express emotions, like…at all.
this goes into a few things
1. yeah talking is hard. even after figuring out what he wants to communicate he will struggle. conversation can be so overwhelming, especially under pressure. he will need time lol
2. because of that, forming connections is hard. i really don’t think meta is much for shallow relationships, and certainly not early in the timeline. which also means he has very little experience with friendship. so a lot of the relationships he did have went kinda neglected, and issues that probably could’ve been worked on by talking became…*cough romk* escalated.
3. honestly i wouldn’t be surprised if meta convinced himself he couldn’t feel emotion (anymore) until like. katam-ish. he tried very hard lol
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vulnerability is terrifying. (though this gesture here is also just comforting, like his little cape cocoon thing he does.)
unmasking—yeah im taking the mask thing very literally here—is a big deal and a very slow process for mk. i’m sure he has a lot of feelings on that lol. it served as a way to ensure no one could ever, y’know, see him.
i can’t say i think he’d ever fully ditch it—there’s always gonna be some days that are more stressful than others and if having it could help him get through it, it just makes sense. mainly when working.
it really is about vulnerability. granted, i don’t think he has the most expressive face (in my head every astral just tends to stare at things) but i doubt he has much control over it. can’t fake a smile but also can’t hide it. probably blushes easy because yeah, astrals; just look at kirby’s face.
just the idea that someone might be able to read his expression and know what he’s feeling before he’s ready for them to (or even understands it himself…) yeah he doesn’t want that
but emotional turmoil aside, i think his mask also hides a lot of his stims
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remember that whole “suppressing your feelings” thing? yeah turns out that ignoring half your instincts isn’t a good idea. so in true meta knight style, he tries to stim as subtly as possible
1. he has the least control over his wings, so they will flick and twitch on their own. they’re usually a good indicator of how he’s feeling, not unlike the body language usually seen in cat ears and tails lol. flapping is also an extension of this of course, though he probably suppresses it more.
2. this also effects when he takes his wings out. pretty much every time he’s excited or nervous it just happens. kinda makes me wonder if his wing cape ordeal might also go into the suppression thing… (i’d say yes, but using a cape is also very comforting so it’s not necessarily a bad thing)
3. going back to the mask thing; he stims a lot underneath it. think like biting or pursing your lips. he bites his tongue and clicks his mouth. that sort of thing. his mask also makes it harder to notice that he is constantly sighing, humming, grumbling…all that
one nice thing about the mask though is that it helps a little bit with lights!!! woo
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(look at him and his magically floating glasses)
sensory stuff—i think he’s mostly bothered by light and sound. maybe a bit of texture. he’s pretty sensory avoidant and perfectly happy standing off to the side not touching anything.
the one exception to this is physical affection, which is, despite all of this, most of how he shows affection. it’s a lot easier to hug someone than to try to explain your feelings for them, after all.
i think he would like pressure though. so that’s probably part of it. and i’m pretty sure there’s some connection in here to fighting (dang, is that the only way he knows how to get his energy out?)
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anyway, pretty much all of this is in contrast to kirby, who i would gladly nominate as the champion of Doing Whatever He Wants. he might pick up a few bad habits, but he will never mask the way meta knight does. he might not understand how he feels, but he’s in tune enough to express it…usually.
this is a very good thing for meta because it helps him to do the same thing. kirby’s so energetic, it’s hard to not want to stim with him. it reminds meta to be kinder to himself and explore his own emotions. he can also help kirby understand themselves, so this connection is very important.
yeah, at the end of the day, everything kinda just boils down to kirby and mk as parallels
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this is the conclusion i promise
to me, meta’s arc is about growing stronger by growing kinder, and this is mostly by learning to be kind to himself. letting himself be a person again, loving and understanding other people, and eventually, letting go of all the expectations placed on him and doing the things he’s always wanted to do…
autism headcanons are fun for me because it’s cathartic to write, but at the same time, it just makes sense in this sort of narrative. meta is, to me, inseparable from these things. and so is kirby! that’s a dynamic that’s a lot of fun to play with, and it’s at the heart of my kirby interpretation.
if you actually read all this WOW thank you
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