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mapletine · 3 months

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silly celeb au concept sketches (wing photocard next week <3)

+ i have so many thoughts abt this au guys i need to be sedated (don’t open the cut unless u rly want more info bc. there's. A LOT. it will be a wall of incoherent rambling text im sorry)

ok first disclaimers: i know very little abt idols and even less abt modeling so!! if anything is horrifically inaccurate forgive me im stupid!! and also this will literally be stream of consciousness unedited so if it makes zero sense im very sorry

now we begin the madness

some background info: kite was scouted off the street (as he was walking off from pickpocketing someone LMAO) for his height and build, currently very sought after to model for many brands because he’s literally the same as the sketch models on paper so the designers don’t have to compromise on their clothing designs to fit the model, bc he just. looks exactly like the paper sketch. also the white hair is very distinctive!! and his prep/management team is his research team <3 he’s currently the face of several brands, including the zoldyck brand (i see the zoldycks as a very influential family in the fashion/modeling industry, kikyo was a former model until an accident, now she’s focusing on designing, all the kids are involved in the industry somehow, illumi is within the same agency (?is that how modeling works) as kite). he’s in his mid-twenties ish and hes 6'3" - 6'4" (190 - 193 cm)

wing and his idol group debuted a couple years ago (haven’t thought too much about the members, but im thinkin feitan maybe? kurapika?? shalnark?? idk guys maybe he’s a solo act) and they’ve skyrocketed to fame. uhh in terms of content they produce, thinkin something similar to wayv/bts type music (stuff that crowds just eat up LOL like love talk by wayv, luna by oneus that kind of music) and im thinking that wing’s debut look was REALLY BAD (they made the poor man blond) but when they put him back to his normal hair color he got rly popular. he’s had some bad eras where the stylists made him look a little goofy but… he’s good now (his best era was the mullet era). also he was trained by bisky who was a former idol who has retired and she's a legend in the industry… and wing is currently guiding an idol trainee (zushi lol). wing’s in his early-mid-twenties i think and he's 5'9" - 5'10" (175 - 178 cm)

ok and the main 4 fit into this uhh... i think gon is also an idol trainee along w zushi. and killua is currently modeling for a popular teen's clothing brand. i think i mentioned kurapika as being a part of wing's idol group but lowk i think maybe he's an actor instead. leorio is also. an actor. yeah ok there we go

uhhhh ok general thoughts:

i see them meeting at like.. the met gala or its equivalent and they meet when wing trips over kite’s clothes (he’s wearing something with a ridiculously long train and wing isn’t looking where he’s going), and at first wing thinks kite is super standoffish/rude bc he doesn’t apologize or offer a hand when wing trips… he just.. sorta stares at him on the floor for a second then clacks off in his very pointy shoes (he was flustered abt the very pretty stranger who just fell for over him. also he was STRESSED asf) (also the perspective that wing had probably didn't help bc bro was on the floor and kite was staring down at him from a height of like 6'9 with the heels)

afterwards there’s a bunch of pictures and edits of wing falling over all over the internet bc it was kind of funny… and ppl are telling him like “oh my god you tripped over yorknew’s top model the LITERAL FACE of fashion right now” and wing is like “damn i didn’t know also he’s a jerk”… and to kite ppl r telling him “oh my god the country’s MOST POPULAR IDOL tripped on you” and kite’s like “uhhh.. who?” (he doesn’t keep up with the entertainment industry despite being a part of it) and they both search each other up and they both have a moment like “oh my god i fucked up (also he's really hot)”

anyways they continue randomly (not at all random very much orchestrated by the people around them) meeting at things,,, there’s a very awkward apology from kite where he explains (sortof) why he didn’t help wing up… uhh stuff happens they fall in love and start dating LOL (i didnt think abt this part that hard) and for a hot minute there r paparazzi photos circulating of them together and the media is losing their collective shit

fast forward a little bit and they r like “yea we r together LOL” and then u start seeing kite at wing’s concerts in a spectator box staring very lovingly at wing on the stage and wing (and sometimes his whole idol group) starts showing up to fashion shows and wing looks like shellshocked every time kite steps onto the catwalk hes got kind of an awed stare on his face

ok future thoughts:

after abt two? ish years dating (engaged for 6 months out of those 2 yrs) they have an extremely private wedding with only close friends invited, and when ppl start noticing theyre wearing wedding bands (takes a while bc wing usually wears a lot of rings anyways, and kite wears his on a necklace and not on his hand) the media has a collective meltdown. again. (i am the media in this i think. i have meltdowns bc of them.)

um and eventually (around when him and kite get married) wing's idol group splits apart as they all go to pursue individual passions/careers, so now he's workin on his own music/vision. i think his personal music is much more peaceful and vibey than what his old group produced, more gentle love songs and poetic music and whatnot.

and kite steps out of the spotlight and is focusing on nature conservation philanthropy type stuff,, so he'll still step out and model for charity/fundraiser type stuff and he's the face of a large conservation foundation. (also bc sometimes he'll join like.. ocean cleanup initiatives or similar things and like. imagine ur volunteering to pick up garbage on the beach and u literally see like. anya taylor joy and her husband also out there picking up garbage or smthn. that's how the other ppl feel.) hes also a big advocate for no kill shelters and donates a shitload to them i like to think.

so yeah ok if u made it this far bless u!!! i dont really have any coherent storyline thoughts just this aggregation of random world building thoughts ok bye (btw if u have thoughts on this feel free to dm me abt them or tell me what u think in the replies or tags im brain rotting abt this stupid au so hard rn)

anyways im no writer (if u couldnt alr tell from this word vomit) so no fic but i may continue churning out thought fragments like this

#kitewing #silly celeb au

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tathrin · 1 year

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i’m so in love with your AU, especially the parts where Gimli is being influenced / hearing the whispers of his ring!! i love hearing Gimli’s inner workings and thoughts as he’s further being corrupted. im not sure where I got the idea that dwarves are more resilient to the influence of the ring (not sure if this is from canon or fanon or just vibes ach) but it’s really fascinating to read your story with the thought that dwarves are resilient (ESPECIALLY GIMLI!!! the knight in shining armour who in the movies literally immediately tried to destroy the ring) and seeing just how far gone Gimli has gone to justify the corruption to himself. its like Gimli is an unmoveable rock and his ring Knows This, so it has chipped away at him slowly, until he withered away and has become something unrecognisable. given what it took for legolas to recognise gimli fully and completely (him taking off his ring) it seems this is already in effect!! but somehow though despite the corruption and the pain going on here i still Trust gimli, isn’t that insane? 😅 it’s like yeah he’s definitely being influenced by evil energy and yeah he’s committed war crimes but also he’s Gimli so that’s okay 🫶 no but in all honesty i feel like how legolas did first seeing him, couldn’t recognise him at first but once i did i flinched back in fear at the dark lord of erebor i saw!! (but also i just feel like when it comes to gimli i cant lose hope!) maybe he snaps out of the evil influence, maybe he falls further into its hold!! who knows what’s gonna happen in this AU? cant wait to read more! <3 (also many apologies for the HUGE chunk of text 😅)

Oh my gods don’t APOLOGIZE for this, I am flailing over it. I am writhing on the floor making happy screams. Thank you ahhhh I am so glad you like it, thank you! And I’m going to respond by rambling my ass off at you, so I hope you don’t regret it too much ahaha. But like. yes! Gimli IS the knight in shining armor! The unmovable rock! The incorruptible pillar! But now...

Well, now I have to justify a dark take on him in this weird-ass AU idea that bopped me on the head out of nowhere lmao. So I’m going to just gush my thoughts out at you incoherently, and see if I can A: get them a little more concrete in my head and B: see what you think! (This is what you get for engaging with me I’m so sorry. You stuck your finger through the cage and now I’m gnawing on it excitedly lol.)

You’re right about Dwarves and the Rings btw, the original Seven Rings couldn’t corrupt the Dwarves the way they did Men (no Ringwraithdwarves lol) they basically just gave them Severe Goldsickness, iirc. But! it’s not gold that Gimli wants! Over him gold shall have no dominion. So that wouldn’t be a very viable way of getting to his heart, silly Ring. So basically where my head went was, the Rings work by corrupting a person’s goodness not by just like. mustache twirling mwa-ha-ha evilness, right? They get to you by offering you what you want, not what the Dark Lord wants; that’s how they hook you, anyway, and then it shifts and drags you down with it into what It wants...but that’s how it starts.

With Frodo, the way the Ring got to him was through him showing Gollum mercy, basically: the whole “I won’t kill you, but if you attack me again you’ll be thrown into fire!” thing. Sure it was wearing him down all along in little ways, but that was where the Ring got its final major defining “in” with him. With Boromir, it was “hey do you want strength to defend your city?” and yeah, of course he does! Who wouldn’t? That’s a viable desire!

So with Gimli, Durin’s Ring has really been working with not a lot so far, tbh.

It’s certainly been enacting influence! Twisting, corrupting, cajoling; chipping away, as you said. A year ago, he wouldn’t have been able to bring himself to do X...but a year ago, he had to do Y. And doing Y makes doing X easier to bear; that’s how corruption works. And the Ring has certainly been working hard. But it just hasn’t been able to get much of a grip.

Because Gimli is compromising his sense of right and wrong for the sake of the greater good, sure; but that was less about the Ring on his hand luring him in than it was about the fact that all of Middle-earth has been conquered by a Dark Lord, so there are no good choices left. Do you defy Gondor and watch your people be slaughtered on the altar of your pride? Or do you bend your knee and try to keep them alive as best you can? Gimli chose the latter, and that’s led to a terrible (and slowly corrupting) struggle, because he has to side with evil “for the sake of his people” and accept, allow, and sometimes even order evil things done, and there’s no good way off that road to hell once you start walking it (especially in Tolkien) — but he hasn’t really needed (or wanted) the power of the Ring. Yet.

Now all of a sudden here’s Legolas in chains before him, and elves are the one thing in Middle-earth who don’t get the option of “bend your knee to the bad guy and live, or defy him and die” — for them, it’s just die. And of course Gimli doesn’t want to stand back and watch Legolas die. But maybe Gimli can save him! He’s the Lord of Erebor! He has a Ring of Power! He should be able to do something to save him...right!?

And that’s how the Ring is (finally!) getting its big “in” with him here.

He’s already compromised himself so much, he thinks; he’s already got so much blood on his hands, spilt to save his people. He’s watched children in Dale starve, because he doesn’t dare give them food the Dark Lord doesn’t think their people have earned. He’s watched Mirkwood burn and stood behind his walls and done nothing. He’s let elves be worked to death in his mines. He’s accepted a Ring of Power, and all it’s done has been to leave him even more powerless than before. He’s stood back while good people were executed, because nothing he said could have saved them and daring to try would have only made more trouble for the people depending on him. He’s pledged his allegiance, and that of his people, to a monster for the sake of making sure the dwarves who rely on him live to see another day. He’s already damned. So what else does he have to lose?

Well. Legolas’s life, as it turns out. And if the Ring can save him...well.

Gimli is such a good, strong person. He’s never wanted power for himself, or lordship, or anything like that. He just wants to save people, to protect them. And just like with Boromir, the Ring is going to offer him the power to do that, and that might be what pushes him over the edge from slowly damning himself by making the best of increasingly bad choices...to falling off the edge into total darkness.

But we’ll see! I have no idea where this story is going to go, so maybe it’ll be a story of salvation! Or maybe it won’t. We get to find out together. Yay?

#you have the best insights into gimli #i am gnawing on my fingers to know what you think ahhh #galadrielspeaks #gimli #gimli dark lord of erebor au #lotr #lotr au #my writing #gimleaf

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otaku-tactician · 9 months

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For the blorbo bingo - any Cu of your choosing? c:

Hello fellow fate fan and Cu enjoyer, thanks for the wonderful ask!! I think I will pick Lancer this time (I'm playing it safe lmao i hope i will be able to be concise and not start screaming incoherently). But also thank you for sharing your Cu theories and analysis with me. I like talking about this guy a lot, but he is absolutely my BLIND SPOT when it comes to understanding!

I apologise in advance if any of my Cu takes are a bit off (a lot of projection can be blamed for this). Also the rambling is extremely long so you can ignore it too. Thanks again!

Note: These are all my personal opinions, not truth (cuz im far from an expert on him)

Cu (Lancer) HAHAHAHA YESSS

This time I am going to be a lot more selfish (extremely selfish) and discuss my personal feelings on the character (which I tend to avoid doing)- based on all the bits I circled. Firstly yeah there is a deep seated reason why I love this character.

It's because well, Cu Chulainn does represent certain qualities that I am obsessed with and yearn deeply for. The way he guards, protects, supports, and takes care of his inner circle is pretty moving. He really cranes out his neck for those that matter to him, and as the white day quiz says; it's like he's kind of a warm blanket as an ally. Just the way he interacts with others in Fuyuki emphasises this, he can be so easy to talk to; he'll offer some great services, and though he can be annoying sometimes, he can be great company too.

Yes I get the people who say Cu is a terrifying warrior- which is especially showcased in how he plays around with weaker opponents/ kills em quickly and talks to them in a friendly yet horrifyingly cold manner concurrently- and he could kill me in my sleep (or anywhere for that matter) BUT he can be so warm as well- or cold- idk he's SEASONAL!!!!!

Yeah, his loyalty is DEFINITELY context dependent (he is a pretty loyal warrior and serves a lord and a friend very well but has had struggles when it comes to loyalty as a lover.... but I tend not to ever talk about that, in fear of pissing off the fans that believe he's a very reliable lover. I'm sorry Cu fans, but I don't quite agree, like YES he can be a good lover but also YES he can fuck up greatly too); but when he cares, he cares deeply and he does his all to be helpful to others- even to the point of self-sacrifice at times-and I really respect that a lot.

Feels like he is a great guy to have as an ally/ friend, which is why I ended up being unable to stop him from becoming MY FAVOURITE GUY OF ALL TIME (sorry gilgamesh).

But there is also a deep seated reason why I hate him so much. I think most of it is just jealousy from the fact that he embraces his role as an outsider, as the one who doesn't quite fit in anywhere; yet is also so popular despite that. I am jealous of his customer service skills, and how he knows so expertly well to craft himself in a way that showcases his best sides to others, and how he isn't afraid to show off his powers. And I am jealous that there are some who see how fucked up he can get, but they still adore him regardless; and he adores them equally too. I AM SO JEALOUS OF CU CHULAINN (especially Lancer) LMAO ITS SO FUNNY I SWEAR TO GOD! Also wtf how dare he rock his blue ponytail and garish clothing and still look sexy I hate it (joking id bang him if he even so much as offered).

And then the next point is I do not like to discuss Cu Chulainn on tumblr (but I LOVE hearing other people's opinions of him). I have witnessed just how mean Cu discourse can get for over 6 years now and it doesn't seem to be improving. However, I have also spoken to many kind and cool Cu fans as well, so the online Cu experience can vary. This is a very unpopular opinion but I LOVE the cute Cu fanarts just as much as the scary ones (cuz its hot i think the duality is SEXY AS FUCK).

But to me the main bit that exhausts me is that it's like I wish there could be a marriage between the different perspectives of this guy, cuz in my opinion I don't really think anyone has gotten him wrong, and it's more like they get him right but maybe certain aspects of him may be more to their particular focus, which is totally fine. I like hearing contrasting takes of Lancer Cu and hope that will continue forevermore.

Like Lancer Cu is full of duality and conflicting and contrasting elements, I believe he just is, y'know. Lancer Cu. But somehow there are loads of tumblr battles about which aspects are more valuable/ less worthy to look at, which REALLY CONFUSES ME!!! And people even sometimes deny Copious Cu Crimes (Cu/CCC) or want to squash out Cute Cu Content (Cu/CCC) which worries me.

(But I am the person who misunderstood his core character for over 6 years, so I admit I used to do this mistake myself. I used to focus so much on his warrior and cold side that I forgot about his affectionate and loving side!)

Why can't warrior cu, adorable cu, scary cu, criminal cu, fucked up cu, mean cu, nice cu, helper cu, loving cu, grumpy ass cu, ruthless cu, perceptive cu, monster cu and funny cu all coexist- please im begging you. And yeah, I also avoid talking about the more negative shenanigans that occurred in certain versions of his myth cuz some of his fans get really angry about it or turn it around to make it seem like I'm the one with a problem for raising it (this actually happened once lmao).

Sorry, I know he did his best to protect his masters in fate and his province as a myth-hero, but the man still also a war criminal in my eyes; through and through. LMAO that is an unpopular take, though. But tbh, I mean if I was a citizen in a holy grail war and Lancer had a master that was like 'hey lancer, drink em for mana' I feel like even if he disapproved, he'd still do it anyway.... That's just how I view him. He can be so wonderful and lovely, but duty comes before all else. That's the vibe he gives me personally. That's why I see his loyalty as context dependent based on individuals involved and the situation itself.

Next yeah, I have unwillingly come around to him because I really did not want to like him at first (I found him intimidating and thought he was wearing a clownsuit at first) but so much for that! Thanks a lot Cu!!! Seriously. One second I was shocked when I witnessed him coldly and ruthlessly kill Shirou on orders and hated on his outfit; next second I was pissing myself with laughter at his banter with Tohsaka Rin- and drooling over that EXACT SAME OUTFIT. How the hell does Lancer Cu even DO THAT? He was just so easy for me to like that I didn't even realise he was my blorbo until I was in deep and I haven't come out since (help me).

Oh gosh it's tough answering every circle. I want to give up! But if he can crack my spine like a crawfish and slurp me up I would likely be grateful. Is this an innuendo or literal though, because if it is literal I will be screaming in pain. But hey, if he's worth it he can slurp my insides anytime (nah i'd cry).

Yeah, my worst mistake and the reason why I struggle so much to characterise Lancer Cu decently is because I have projected so heavily and so MESSILY onto him that I accidentally gave him some of my real life headcanons. And it is so creepy because hopefully me and this guy aren't similar. I mean, I don't think I'm like Lancer Cu at all (most people say I'm like Archer, who I don't really see myself as either). But sorry Lancer Cu, I definitely threw some of my trauma of feeling like an outsider onto you. MY BAD!

Could I make him worse? HAHAHA, YES. Because I can challenge him in terms of ideals (I doubt he'd take me seriously though), and could very easily piss him off. I think my personality is definitely an antithesis to his, maybe I'm even his opposite. Because he's like 'ENJOY THE MOMENT, KEEP BALLING EVEN IF YOUR LIFE IS SHIT, OVERCOME AND ADAPT TO SUFFERING' and he does that very well, even when things knock him to the floor he keeps going (but then in turn runs away from certain issues and struggles to share his traumas).

But I could probably piss him off by saying 'IM BALLING AND OVERCOMING THINGS LIKE YOU BUT THE SUFFERING ISNT FUCKING ENDING AND THE PAIN IS GETTING WORSE THIS IS BULLSHIT' is that a clown 2 clown communication???? I have no idea. I bet he'd hate me for saying that though but that's okay, maybe he'd simply brush me off- but if he was a debate guy I would debate him!

Yeah the pretty privilage, he is a really beautiful man. That's all. He is so beautiful- stunning, even. TT-TT Super pretty. Doesn't help that his personality is interesting as well. Maybe I am just obsessed with him?? And yeah, he is kinda the white noise in my brain, he infiltrates my own actions and life choices by a great deal, I often think sometimes 'HEY WHAT WOULD LANCER CU DO? HOW WOULD HE REACT?' to even the simplest things and start laughing, or someone can remind me of him and I start laughing, or I think 'oh damn wish i could talk to him' I am like the PARASOCIAL FAN! HELP!!!! Also I think about him at random times. Lately, I have become more normal(?) about him but all it takes is 1 thing and he's back in my brain full time again.

Yeah, he is very complex and well written in my personal opinion. I think Nasu and the crew have done really well. I love how great a job they've done of making him seem like an annoying bawdy loud man as well as an incredibly intelligent, perceptive and agile warrior at the same time (and then he can even be bashful too). He a great character, he has so much nuances like a real human being so he gets a 10/10 from me. One personal example I have is that I used to think Cu was ALWAYS the happy loud funny annoying flirt guy off the job, until I started seeing scenes in anime like Emiya Gohan which showcases how no actually he also can be quiet sometimes and enjoy a bit of time alone, or needs time to disengage and cool off by himself.

I mean I don't usually even notice these aspects of characters. But with Lancer Cu, I constantly have to re-learn how to appreciate him because of how varied his character is.

Yeah I got the brainrot, but it's the brainrot of constantly having to readjust the way in which I view him. And the extreme brainrot I get whenever I start going bazongas about his hotness. I keep my Lancer Cu horny thoughts to myself for that reason lmao, I mean I have a crapload of suppressed horny thoughts so i think its horny brainrot in regards to him :)

Idk... I am biting my fist? The more appearances, the better. I am glad he is popular = more canon and fanon content.

As for putting him in situations, I would say stop but .... it's kind of entertaining. But I'd like to see him win a grail war someday. ALSO THOUGH THE WHOLE BAZETT STORY IS SO SAD BRUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH i pray for an alternate saga where Cu and Bazett remain master/servant for the whole war cuz I'd cry if that happened and enshrine it my heart 4eva. I forgot my point for this part now....

For the next one, I used to need Lancer Cu in this way. It was an extremely unhealthy and scary time in my life to be frank. It took me through a journey where I had to confront some very personal issues and traumas. SO THANK YOU LANCER CU FOR FORCING ME TO FACE MY TRAUMAS!!!! Cuz yeah when I say I used to rely heavily on this blorbo to live.... my god. Yeah. It was not a good time. Hahahaha... yeah it was the worst time ever. It took me a long time to even admit he was my blorbo, cuz of all the issues it unleashed in my own personal life.

I AM NOT NORMAL ABOUT HIM AT ALL! I PROJECTED MY MENTAL ILLNESSES ONTO LANCER AND THEN HAD TO CONFRONT AND BETTER MYSELF TO OVERCOME THEM AND ENJOY HIM THE WAY I DO TODAY! THATS WHY I SAY IT SUCKS THAT ITS SO HARD TO FEEL SAFE AND COMFY WHEN SHARING CU POSTS ON THE INTERNETS! I WISH THAT THERE CAN BE LANCER CU STUFF FOREVER AND ALSO MY VIEWPOINTS ON HIM ARE EXTREMELY BIASED AND SUBJECTIVE BECAUSE HE IS MY FAVORITE GUY OF ALL TIME SO I ACCIDENTALLY PROJECTED ONTO HIM AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

also he is so fucking hot too WHYYYYYYYYY THIS IS JUST I- WHAT WHY UGH AND IM SO JEALOUS OF HIM AND HIS GENDER AND ITS SO UNFAIR THAT I LIKE HIM SO MUCH!!!! I AM SO GRATEFUL AND SO ANGRY!

#asks #aaaamorphous-entity #personal #personal on fgo #thank you. a day with cu is a great day. everyday is worth it with cu chulainn LMAOOO #i hate how whenever cu is mentioned i never shut up i just have a lot to say about him also he is so SPICY!#thanks again for the ask it means a lot. and sorry if some cu takes arent right i do this a lot

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violetlunette · 1 year

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I really dont like the recent chapters. Which sucks cause i like these concepts and tropes!

The lack of world building and discrimination as a tangible thing is the story screwed Shoji and Spinner over. Especially since both of their stories been foreshadowed since the very beginning but the lack of build up and focus around them makes the pay off feel unearned and shoved in.

Shoji's arguements make no sense, Spinner can't even coherently oppose him since he's under AfO grasp. It doesnt show or provide anything. We didn't know before hand the abuse heteromorphs face was inconsistant in the city compared to the countryside (which feels like a copout to me) nor were we ever shown the characters questioning any form of discrimination and actively doing something about it in a broader societal sense.

It feels so underdeveloped despite apparently being a core part of the worldbuilding.

Speaking of discrimination, what about the quirkless? What about those with weak quirks? Why is it focusing only on Heteromorphs? What about the broader implication of that discrimination? What would happen to others under AfO's new rule? Why is it exclusively a city and country thing? If defeating Spinner is defeating his arguements then why isnt he present for it?

Not to mention, what about the current system? Why have we not seen the systemic issues be challenged or change and only get a brief mention? Why have Spinner be unable to counter Shoji's weak arguements? Why bring AfO into it at all? (aside from what he was offering)

You know the longer im writing this the more i wonder WHY AFO?

The meta liberation army represented these themes much better and there would be a more concrete focus on why what theyre doing is wrong for everyone (ie changing who the aggressor is rather than addressing factors that limit them)

AfO has no connection to this, aside from beneffiting him. AfO being involved cheapens it since because of him Spinner can't respond! Hell combine with him possessing Shigaraki it feels more of 'AfO is the root and cause of all the problems' rather than 'AfO is exploiting the problems the heroes themselves cause' since the heroes apparently aren't aware of those problems or are tackling them.

Sorry if this sounds incoherent. I like AfO as a villain and him possessing Shigaraki is still neat, but i feel like the way/when of it isnt the best executed. I dont know how to word it without going to another long ramble, but the short version is i feel like the league members should have been more opposed to the whole possession thing and have more imput into the situation before majority where killed or incompacitated. But that may just be me.

Welcome back, Longy! (Hope that's you. If not, hello Longy 2.)

I agree with several points here! I think a lot of these come from the fact Hori’s a plotter, not a pantser. For those unaware, a plotter—aside from being someone who schemes—is a type of writer who needs to plan the whole story out before writing. A pantster--aside from being a mischievous asshole who pulls people’s pants down—is a writer who writes by the seat of their pants. Meaning, they figure things out as they go along with only the bare basics to guide them. Hori seems to fall into the former. Everything that he planned since the beginning seems to be flowing smoothly. Like with All Might’s arc; that was planned out since the beginning, and there wasn’t a lot of change to it, so it all connects together smoothly. Meanwhile, things he was forced to change or suddenly add feel rocky and out of place. For example—just pick an arc that feels weird to you. That was probably suddenly added or changed. (Trust me, you’ll know what this is. As I stated previously, human brains are programmed to follow stories. That’s why plot holes, or things that don’t fit, irk us so.) And now Hori’s being forced to rush things, so he’s trying to force it all in, but there’s no time, so it’s clunky. It doesn’t help that these are subjects that he doesn’t have experience writing, as evident from his previous works. Hori does have interesting ideas; Shoji’s conflict and backstory are interesting (though they should have been introduced before the climax, that's for when the manga's done). And having Spinner become a monster was also good. It was supposed to demonstrate how All for One corrupts desperate people and twists them along with the things they once valued. However, he didn’t have enough time to sit with it and plan it out, so it was hurried and sloppy. As with several points of this story.

Personally, I believe that if was able to plot out the entire series and write it before publishing, we would have gotten a better story. But sadly, as a mangaka, you can’t do that. That profession requires pantser skills where you have to adapt in an instance to every little thing in context and meta-wise. Fans like a character you were going to make an asshole, or suddenly got the urge to write said character in a different light? Then you have to make up a new arc and fit it smoothly into the story on the dot. People don’t like a character who was going to be a major player? Gotta either figure out how to fix him or kick him to the wayside. The plot point doesn’t match up, shoot gotta fix it, and so on. That’s why a lot of manga characters are pretty simple to start off with and the stories are in smaller arcs with a VERY simple overarching arc to tie them together. (Such as there's a great evil that the heroes want to stop, or they're looking for a lost treasure.) It’s unfortunate, but that’s how it is. I really wish we got to read the version where Hori was able to take his time and plan everything out but once the manga became popular, that wasn’t going to happen.

#sorry this is sloppy!#I'm working on something else but didn't want to leave you hanging too long #bnha #mha #bnha meta #plotting vs pantsing #I'm a plotter myself which is why I take forever to write #so I feel for Hori #Others say he's a bad writer #I say he's just not given the proper time and space to do things #Like I think if his editors gave him room to work and breathe #without the chart says nonsense #everyone including hori would be happier #anon reply

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rearranging-deck-chairs · 2 years

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Not to randomly dump eldritch Time Lord thoughts on you, but I read the Master and Margarita story today and now I'm having Fungus Time Lord Thoughts. Like... you know how mushrooms are only the obvious fruiting bodies of a much larger network of subterranian roots and connections? Time Lords are that for the Matrix. How do you add more information to your big spooky ghost computer? Generate semi-independent sensory organs that can go out and gather data, then upload both during consciousness and once dead. How do you spread your big spooky ghost computer's influence, both obviously and in terms of memetic/Spiral Politic power? Have your sensory organs be capable of talking about it to other lesser species, capable of copying it and using it to store new things (*cough* Cybermen *cough*). Why would Time Lords need traditional reproduction when they're just genetic material being reorganized for maximum efficiency by their hyphae- I mean Matrix? And of course the productions get a little strange after a while - the Matrix is bored of the same old experiences, and the Doctor and the Master and their ilk gather so much interesting data that the backlash to the hivemind is worth it

aaaaahhhhhhhh no PLEASE always randomly dump eldritch time lord thoughts on me this is FANTASTIC. dont know what about that story sparked these thoughts but i have to go read it

i have nothing to add to this but im gonna be thinking about it it's Perfect. so in this conceptualisation of time lords and the matrix, is it like- oh the frankenstein thoughts. and like, god thoughts. did gallifreyans make the matrix and then the matrix made timelords? i mean, really simplified summary way of putting it but? did the,,, like,,, locus of, like, agency,,,,move? aaahhh im-

i dont have good thoughts about this!!!

but im thinking about memes and genes and the illusion of our individual agency (illusion might apply to 'individual' or to 'agency' im not sure) and how that sometimes seems to sorta seep down (or up?) into the collective we share and then suddenly we seem agenciless. or our agenciless becomes more pronounced. i dont know if the level of agency shifts or if only our perception of it shifts but i dont think it really matters either. i dont think it makes much of a difference because we dont disconnect from the collective. we are water in the wave when it's storm or when it's calm. we just might notice it less when it's calm. we may feel like we're just water then

and im thinking of gallifreyans building a big computer and- theyre already a collective. theyre a collective of a species and a society just like we are. but then they build a big computer and like a cybernisation that actually makes more sense if you think about it, than our current cyberpunk ideas of we modify our individual body, they modify their collective. not makes more sense but is an addition that now that ive thought it i cant believe i havent before

thank you for this thought! im sorry that i have nothing to offer you but incoherent rambling

where we have waves of both memetic and genetic information moving our water, did timelords move all of it, all of the reproduction of their species, into memetic information? we've got two, we reproduce through both, the idea of us reproduces, we're driven to make the ideas of our societies reproduce, but our physical bodies presence is also important. like to make humanity live on, we really are driven to safeguard both right? how well these projects do or do not work is not the point now but: language revitalisation, colonies on mars, "this place is not a place of honour". and for genocide you have to kill both the people and the idea of the people.

did timelords make themselves entirely ideas? their dna is in the matrix, written into time or space or something. you can kill the body but you cant kill the timelord. you can explode gallifrey but you cant erase it. division uses every species every world every moment. "i didnt even think these were real" but you did know of it. an organisation that has time travel has always had time travel, will always have time travel

#/propagation/#oh now we're woe begone posting again im sorry guys #im not even entirely sure yet i understand what that means in woe begone #bUT IT"SDEFINITELY RELATED #yes i will incessantly talk about woe begone to get you time travel nerds to please listen to woe begone #anyway rain thank you for this #sorry i just yelled at you about vaguely maybe related ideas?#got off track maybe #im very obsessed wtih the image of timelords as sensory organs #i dont have anything interesting to add but im gonna be Thinking about it #just the entire image of timelords as a fungus is phenomenal thank you for this #dont forests kinda work in a similar way?#anyway #timelord body horror #bc i dont know what else to tag it

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zackmartin · 2 years

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hang on im having a vision. ok. florist!henry and mechanic!zack. zack leaves an oil handprint on hens workspace and it ticks him off and then other stuff happens and then they kiss and then ride off into the sunset on zacks motorcycle that he has now

Okay, sorry this took me legit over a whole ass month, my body hates me but. The way you’re literally a genius, like truly a visionary of our time. Like, I’ve legit been thinking about this au this entire time. “on zacks motorcycle that he has now” the way that you literally Get Him. (but seriously, I always give him a motorcycle in the future because he had one at least one point in his life. Like, he just did)(and I had (have?) a one-shot for Christmas where Hen is visiting Boston for the holidays and Zack’s dad gives him his old motorcycle as a Christmas gift and Zack’s so excited about it he wants to drive it right that second and he asks Henry to go with him and Hen’s like “right now? When it’s like, 10 degrees outside?” and idk why I’m telling you that but I am so.) ANYWAY. Just as a warning before I get into it, this is probably going to be kinda messy and rambly because I have really severe brain fog from my new meds like, it’s BAD. So, I apologize in advance, hopefully I’m not TOO incoherent lmao

send me an au and i'll tell you how i'd have it play out!

Lizzie, I am. So SO sorry for how long this ended up being. You activated that part of my brain and I went absolutely NUTS but I obviously don’t expect you to read all this, just know i had so much fun with it 💕

I think Alyson Stoner’s Max should work at Zack’s auto shop with him. No real reason why, I just want her too. I want them to be mechanic besties, and i want Max to make fun of Zack when she figures out that Zack is crushing on the florist next door

OKAY, SO. Henry’s a florist that owns this little, modest flower shop in Swellview and one day an auto shop opens in the vacant spot right next door

But, Henry doesn’t actually meet his new “neighbor” until the grand opening of their shop when he comes strolling into his flower shop, and despite the fact that his auto place has only been open for a few measly hours, his overalls and work boots are already covered in gunk, and he smells like a nice mix of oil, gasoline, and a hint of sweat, which is already a bit of a turn off (but like. His outfit reminds henry of schwoz because it’s literally the same outfit schwoz always wore, just long-sleeved and covered in grease LASKJDF so like. Zack’s just. Got too many things working against him right now)

(Also, just as a side note, Zack’s also wearing a worn out baseball cap, sometimes backwards, pretty much every day while at work. Idk why, but it’s happening in this au, and no I don’t take criticism)

But, this guy’s obviously trying to be nice, so Henry tries too, despite the fact that Zack’s putting his grease-covered hands all over everything, leaving gross fingerprints on the glass counter Henry just cleaned

He introduces himself, and Henry, in a fit of annoyance, is very sarcastically like “I never would’ve guessed” considering it’s literally stitched in giant, white lettering on his overalls

I want Zack to call Henry “flower boy” in this AU just as a fun little reference to the fact that we call him “flower boy Henry” whenever we discuss the iconic flower camp line. I will not be taking any criticism at this time

Zack tries to be helpful by pulling a rag out of his back pocket to wipe up his mess, except the rag also has stuff all over it, and it basically just spreads the grease around, so now instead of a few tiny fingerprints, there’s a giant smeary circle that takes up like a ¼ of the counter

Henry’s just staring at him like “........really?”

And that’s when Zack’s like “maybe I should go” Henry: “maybe you should”

As Zack’s backing out, he accidentally bumps into a display, knocking a few potted plants over, and ofc, they break

Zack offers to pay for them, but Henry just,,,, does not want him to cause anymore damage so he’s just like “I will forget everything if you please just leave. NOW”

But, despite the fact that Zack literally left the worst first impression, Henry’s dealt with wayyyy worse customers, so once he’s cooled off, he’s decided not to hold a grudge (or. So he thinks)

But, the thing is. Henry doesn’t need to have peace and quiet all the time, because, I mean. He practically grew up with Piper’s screaming temper tantrums, and Ray’s temper tantrums, and the chaos that was the Man Cave, and even the chaos that was Kid Danger missions, so it’s not like he needs it to be quiet 24/7 but like. This particular auto shop is. Very loud

Between the whir of the tools and the fact that they always have the radio turned up as loud as it can go 24/7 is enough to drive anyone insane

(And to make matters worse, the music they always play is literally the worst music Henry’s ever heard in his entire life)

And there’s just that one day where Henry’s having one of those mornings where everything that can go wrong, will go wrong; like, his alarm didn’t go off so he’s late, and he spills his drink all over himself and his car on the drive to work, and he gets stuck in traffic, and he has a raging headache. One of ThoseTM days, ya know?

But much to his relief, this is one of those rare mornings where the auto place doesn’t have the radio on, so the only thing he hears is the occasional sound of the louder tools

And his shop is kinda slow, so he’s able to just go through the motions of doing arrangements and trimming

Except, around noon, the radio goes on. And it’s not like they turn it on and gradually turn it up. It always starts out full blast, and it startles Henry to the point where he accidentally clips the top of a rose clean off

And that’s kinda when he has his “that’s it!” moment of just being,,, completely tired of this shit

So he storms over to the shop and finds Zack, who's currently sprawled out under a car

And Henry tries to get his attention just by calling his name, but it’s so damn loud in there

So Hen has to kinda,,,tap his boot to get his attention (except. It’s a little harder than just a tap. Like, not enough to hurt him, ofc, but it’s more than just a nudge lmao)

And Zack rolls out, completely unaware that Hen’s been stewing in annoyance towards him for the past few months to where he now completely despises him, so Zack’s just like “:) hey, Flower Boy. What’s up?”

Hen: “first off, don’t call me that. And secondly: really, with the radio? Do we have to do this everyday? Haven’t you ever heard of headphones? Or…spotify?” Zack, scoffing, like this should be the most obvious thing in the world: “We can’t use headphones with these power tools. I need to hear if someone comes up behind me.” Henry: “...........you literally couldn’t hear me yelling when I was standing right here!”

Zack just shrugs at this

Henry: “Whatever. If you’re going to insist on playing this everyday, can you at least pick something good, instead of this garbage?” Zack, now standing up at the speed of light: “Garbage?!? This isn’t garbage! Bro, these are classics!!!!”

Then Hen does that like, scrunched up face he does (the like, wtf face. Idk how to describe it, and I’m too lazy to find an example, but hopefully you know what I’m talking about alksdjf) “Don’t call me bro. We’re not bros. And it’s garbage. Please, just….pick something different.” Zack: “Well, what would you suggest?” Henry, who wasn’t prepared to offer an alternative: “....Not that!”

And then he’s storming off again. And ofc now Zack’s annoyed, cause this dude just came waltzing into his garage just to demand he change his radio station, and how dare he call the classics garbage?!?!?! Buuuuuuuuut….there’s just something about him that Zack can’t help the little ghost of a grin that’s creeping onto his face and he literally can’t stop himself from watching Henry go. Like, he would never admit it out loud at this point, but he’s just the tiniest bit attracted to that fiery side of Hen

and ofc in this au, Henry’s car is a clunker (three guesses as to where I’m going with this alskdjf). It gets him from point A to point B, but just barely

There’s one night where Henry’s driving home after finally getting one of his every-few-months hangouts with Jasper and Char where they all catch up and it’s like, the wee hours of the morning, and he’s on a back road (because the two of them live a few towns over, so the three of them always have to drive a bit to meet at a town in the middle) (luckily he’s back in the Swellview city limits, tho) And what should happen?

If you guessed “his car breaks down”, you are correct!

Henry’s been….kinda neglectful about getting maintenance on it, because there’s only one (1) auto shop in Swellview that he doesn’t want to take it to for obvious reasons and he’s just been too busy (and honestly, too lazy) to take to a different shop in another city, so he really isn’t shocked that this happened

But ofc it had to happen on a back road where he gets no cell service, at a time of night when hardly any (if any) cars go by

He pops the hood, just to see if maybe it’s something he can fix on his own, but that man don’t know shit about cars

By some lucky twist of fate, about a half an hour later, this motorcycle pulls up

And motorcycle guy asks Henry if needs help, and ofc Hen is like “yes, please. Thank you so much” and he feels so relieved because, up until this point, his only options were sleeping in his car or making the million mile trek back to town, and considering he’s not a teen anymore, either of those options would probably result in several body parts being wildly sore tomorrow lmao

As they’re shutting off their bike and putting down the kickstand, Henry’s like,,,,struggling to see them in the dark (even with the flashlight on his phone) so he can’t tell who it is right away (but it doesn’t matter, cause they’re wearing one of those helmets that hides their whole face anyway).

The only thing he can really make out is the guitar shaped case that strapped to their back that they take off and set down next to their bike, and the jeans and leather jacket they’re wearing, and even tho Hen hasn’t seen their face yet, the bike and the guitar and the jacket makes Henry have a very fleeting thought of “hm. Kinda hot”

Listen. I know it would be super corny and stupid. I know, I KNOW. BUT. I really need Zack taking off his helmet to be like that scene in jatp when Willie takes off his helmet in slo-mo. And as he’s doing it, Zack’s like, “So, don’t recognize me without the overalls and grease, huh? 😏”

And ofc Henry’s having an “oh NO” moment, because the thought doesn’t go away even after he finds out that motorcycle guy is Zack, so now he has to reconcile with the fact that Annoying Auto Shop Guy is also Hot Motorcycle Guy

But, Henry doesn’t want him to know that ofc, so he’s gotta try to be cool (or. As cool as henry can be asldfjk)

Zack: “Man, how lucky are you that the person who finds you on the side of the road at this time of the night just happens to be a mechanic? :)” Henry, sarcastically: “Yeah, I feel super lucky right now” Zack: “Must be fate 😏” Henry, through gritted teeth: “It’s…certainly something.”

Zack goes to look under the hood and he just says out loud “so, what seems to be the issue?”

And Henry, who doesn’t know SHIT about cars, decides to just throw out the first car sounding word he thinks of: “I think it’s the…..carburetor”

Zack: “I’ll give you fifty bucks right now if you can point to the carburetor. Actually, you don’t even need to point to it specifically, just the general area of where it is.”

Henry takes a shot in the dark and points to a random spot, but Zack makes this like, loud buzzing noise to indicate that he’s wrong. Henry tries two more times, with two more loud, obnoxious buzzing noises from Zack, before he’s very impatiently like: “alright, then why don’t you just tell me where it is if you’re such an expert?!”

Zack, lips slowly curling into a shit eating grin: “It was trick question, Flower Boy. This car doesn’t have a carburetor.”

Henry, scoffing: “I know. I was just testing you to make you sure you know what you’re doing. You passed.”

Zack just rolls his eyes and breathes out a laugh before he looks under the hood to see if he can find the issue, and he’s just like, “Man…when was the last time you changed the oil on this thing?” Henry: “You’re supposed to change the oil?” Zack, whirling around to face him, looking like he’s about to have a stroke: “Please, tell me you’re joking” Henry: “Pfft! Of course I’m joking. I know you’re supposed to change the oil”

Anyway, it ends up that it’s an issue that Zack can’t fix right there, so he drives Henry home on his bike that night (much to Henry’s dismay) and has the car towed to the shop the next morning

And when Henry goes over a few hours later after Zack’s had time to really run a diagnostic, Zack has to tell him that the cost of fixing the car is wayyyy more than the cost of the car itself and it would be MUCH cheaper in the long run to just get a new car

But like. Henry’s had this car since he was young, like he drove Piper to her high school graduation in it, and he and Charlotte and Jasper took a road trip in it the summer after they graduated college before they all started their careers and went their separate ways, and even though Henry’s not really in contact with Ray anymore, Ray was the one that helped him pick out this car since Henry doesn’t really know anything about them, so in a weird way, it’s kinda like his last connection to him, so he really can’t bring himself to give it up just yet

And for some weird reason, henry ends up telling Zack all of this because he’s basically having a breakdown about having to get rid of it

And Zack can definitely understand that, considering the only person from his past that lives in Swellview is Max, and even though he would never ever admit it, he misses his brother and his parents and his friends

So, he promises Henry that he’ll fix it, and he’ll even offer him the hefty friends and family discount, but only if Henry agrees to let Zack show him how to fix it

And ofc now Henry’s really confused because that just seems like a really bad business decision lsdkjf

But Zack’s just like: “I would just feel better knowing that you’ll know what to do if you end up broken down on the side of the road in the middle of the night again. It’s solely about your safety” (It isn’t. He obviously just wants an excuse to spend time with the cute Flower Boy) Zack, King of terrible jokes: “I can’t always be your knight in shining leather”

Ofc, it’s bad enough for Henry just having this shop right next door, but having to spend a few hours after work learning how to fix cars from Zack just sounds like absolute torture (especially now that he’s like, the tiniest bit attracted to him)

Zack: “Either you spend this little time with me now, or you spend every few months bringing it in for maintenance. Either way, I win.”

And that sounds wayyy worse to Henry, so he begrudgingly agrees

If I was gonna write this, I would have to include a scene where this like, ridiculously flashy pink limo shows up (there’s some crazy shit in Swellview, but even this is pretty wild for downtown), and this girl in a sparkly outfit that looks like she belongs on rodeo drive rather than main street steps out, a blonde girl in much more casual clothes behind her

Henry’s been in his back office up till this point, but his employees and even a few of the customers are excitedly chatting about something, so much so that it piques his interest, so he goes to see what’s up, and one of his co-workers is very eagerly like “London Tipton is outside!!”

(the only reason Henry even knows that name at all is because Piper and Jasper were both obsessed with her web show aldkjf)(Henry, on the other hand, has been a bit turned off to web shows ever since Frankini LASKDJF)

And much to everyone’s even bigger shock, London and her blonde girlfriend she’s holding the hand of (obviously it’s Maddie. I literally would not pair London with any other girl but Maddie. They’re soulmates, your honor), step right into Henry’s shop

London tries to skip the line, but Maddie gently holds her back

On the other side of the counter, Henry has to quietly tell some of his employees to chill, cause they’re practically buzzing lmao

When the two girls finally get to the front, London is like “I’m looking for Harry-” “Henry,” Maddie corrects

Henry, who is now thoroughly confused: “That’s…. me?” (Like, he doesn’t even know what London’s doing in a place like Swellview to begin with, let alone his little modest shop, but now he’s trying to figure how the fuck she knows of him enough to literally ask for him by name. Almost. like he’s wracking his brain to figure out what obscure connection they may have)

Anyway, they’re there because they’re getting married, and Maddie wants to use all small businesses for it (like for the cake and the catering etc) so they want Henry’s shop to do the flowers

And ofc, Henry’s thrilled about that, because London Tipton’s wedding is a huge deal (like, it’s literally being covered by like E! News alsdkjf)

After the meeting when they’re getting ready to leave, Henry’s curiosity finally gets the better of them, and he just asks how they heard about his place and they’re like “You came very highly recommended by a friend :)”

But that really does nothing to help Henry figure it out, because he doesn’t know what friend they might possibly have in common

Anyway, after they leave, Zack meets them outside on the sidewalk (so, Henry can see them through his shop window). Zack gives London this big bear hug (despite her obvious protests considering he’s all covered in gross stuff)(Maddie, however, happily accepts his hug) and that’s when it finally ClicksTM for Hen

So, when Henry goes over that night after work to work on his car, he’s like “So. I met your friend London today.” and then he sort of defensively is like, “you know, I really don’t need you doing me any favors” Zack, scoffing loudly: “You think I care about doing you a favor? I believe in your business, Hen. I figured you could find the perfect balance between London’s flashy taste and Maddie’s more modest one. That’s all.” Henry, unsure of how to take a compliment from Zack, of all people: “Oh…..Well, thank you.”

And now there’s a kind of tension in the air because this is the first conversation they’ve had since they met where they aren’t lowkey bitching at each other (and this is kinda the turning point where those annoyed feelings start turning into genuine “I really like this person” feelings)

One night, when there’s a sort of lull in the conversation, Zack asks Henry if flowers really do have their own secret language

At first, Henry kinda just gives one word answers, partially just to be spiteful, and also partially because, usually when he starts talking about this stuff with others, they quickly grow bored (the only one that really listens is Charlotte, and that’s because I LOVE Nesha’s HC about Char being a plant Mom that has like, a whole forest in her apartment.)

But, Zack keeps gently pushing him to keep going until Henry finally caves (if you were to ask Zack directly, he would say he just wanted to know because he was bored of the awkward silence between them, but it’s actually because he’s starting to view Henry as a legit friend and he’s got a lil’ crush, so he wants to share in something that Henry is obviously passionate about)

So, it basically becomes a situation where there’s a trade off: Zack teaches Henry something about fixing a car engine and Henry teaches Zack something about flowers

Anyway, Zack starts flirting using flowers lasdkjf Like, henry goes into work a little late one day, and one of his employees is like “oh, by the way, a customer left a gift for you. It’s on your desk ;)” and it’s a single flower that Henry told Zack the meaning of, and it’s basically supposed to be like, a symbol for admiration

Zack sometimes gets it wrong but Henry can usually piece together what he meant

(and sometimes he gets it very right, but Henry thinks he got it wrong. Like, he sends one where he’s pretty much trying to tell Henry in no uncertain terms that he’s super into him, but Hen thinks he just messed up again. Like, he couldn’t possibly have meant to send such a strong message)(even though it gets to a point where Henry is also super into him, so he’s desperately wishing that’s what he meant)

(they’re idiots to idiot lovers in all universes, your honor)

Sometimes he sends one back, so it gets to the point where they’re having a whole secret conversation using flowers

Anyway, there’s one night a few months later when they’re so smitten with each other, and Zack’s showing Henry how to do something, and Henry’s pretending like he doesn’t know how to use a wrench asldjkf so that Zack will have to put his hand over Henry’s to show him how to do it (like those really cheesy scenes where a guy is showing a girl how to hit a golf ball, so he puts his arms around her, and guides her through it; same deal here, just with a wrench instead LSJDKF)

And the closeness from that kinda leads to their first kiss. It should be the most unromantic setting, what with them literally standing over an old engine, in a dingy garage, but they somehow make it work

Zack: Sooooo, uhhh…..what kinda flower would you use if you wanted to ask someone out? Like….on a date? 👀” Henry tells him that there isn’t one that means that EXACT phrase (if there is, I’m sorry, google was wildly unhelpful lsdkjf), but red roses are pretty well known for being romantic in nature, so you can’t really go wrong with them

So, ofc when Henry goes into work the next day, there’s a single red rose on his desk

And, that’s pretty much it! They go on a date, they fall in love, they ride off into the sunset on Zack’s motorcycle

Oh! And I meant to say this wayy earlier but like, okay. Gays stick together, this is a fact laksjdf so like, even though it isn’t on purpose, a lot of the people that work for Henry and Zack are LGBT in some way, so they all end up becoming friends with each other at one point, and they eventually get a pool going on how long it takes for Zack and Hen to get together

Like, they’re all just getting a drink after work together one day, and they’re talking about a fight Hen and Zack got into that day and one of them is just like “they need to just kiss already, this is getting ridiculous”

Zack and Hen eventually figure this out, though, so like, they keep pretending to hate each other just to mess with them LSKJDF

Like, Zack goes storming into Henry’s office one day, and he slams the door shut behind him, and all of Hen’s employees are looking at each other like “👀😳” cause obviously they think they’re about to have another knockdown, drag out fight, but they’re actually just, having lunch together lajksdf

They would find out eventually, tho, cause Zack’s not shy about PDA and he would either forget, or one of the employees would walk in on them giving each other a kiss goodbye or something, and then it would be all over, because that would spread like wildfire through that little group alskdjf

The only one that knows from the very beginning is Max, and that’s not because Zack told her, she literally just knows him really well and she can tell he’s lying and she also can see the literal hearts in his eyes whenever Henry is around sldkjf

A few more HCs just cause I’m obsessed with this AU:

They still send flowers back and forth to each other every once in a while, just because that’s a thing that’s so exclusive to them and they like it

There’s a time after Henry’s been riding Zack’s motorcycle pretty regularly, where he goes through this phase of wanting to throw himself into it by wearing the leather jacket, and the fingerless gloves and shit, and his outfit basically ends up being the one he wears with the sunglasses in the Danger Force episode Return of the Kid (if you don’t remember it, or for anyone else that might be reading that doesn’t know what I’m talking about, if you google that episode, it’ll will show you the exact outfit I mean)

And Zack has to very gently be like “Baby. No.” cause let’s be real, that outfit looks fucking ridiculous anywhere outside of dystopia alskdjf

He basically gets Henry down to just the leather jacket and the shades but Henry’s still like “I’m keeping the fingerless gloves”

Zack, after letting out a HUGE sigh: “Fine.”

Although, there is a huge part of Zack that loves the wardrobe change, because he thinks his boyfriend looks very hot in leather jackets

If Zack and Hen are in Zack’s garage during work hours, and they give each other even a quick little goodbye kiss or something, every single one of Zack’s employees will whistle or whoop or something. Every. Single. One. (because Zack just has that type of friendship with his employees, like there’s a definite camaraderie in that garage) (also it happens every single time)

Max literally will not let Zack live down the fact that he’s now hopelessly in love with the flower shop owner he used to make fun of

I didn’t say it earlier in the fic, but Zack is a part of a band in this universe, but just as a hobby, and they sometimes play at bars. And when Zack finds Henry on the side of the road, he’s actually coming back from one of those gigs

they play that music that Henry can’t stand, but actually, it’s good when zack does it alksdjf

Zack and Henry are a cheesy couple in every universe lasdkjf Sometimes Zack will sing/play directly to Henry (like they’ll just lock eyes, and it’s like they’re the only two people in the bar) and their friends around them are definitely standing there like “🙄🙄 really?” but they all secretly think it’s cute. They WILL relentlessly tease them both about it, tho

There’s two constants whenever Henry goes to see Zack play: 1. He always gets tipsy lasdkjf and 2. He always turns to the random strangers around him to very proudly declare: “that’s my boyfriend! He's in the band. :)”

Zack does it too, though. Like, they’ll be at some random wedding, and Zack’ll point to the floral centerpiece and just be like “Do you see this? My boyfriend did this :) He did all the flowers. He’s so cool 🥰”

Anyway, I gotta stop myself here cause I’ll just keep going on forever if I don’t, but. thank you, Lizzie, for this gift, I’m literally having a BLAST thinking about this universe 🥺🥺🥺💓💓💓

#asks #au ask game #lizzie tag 🐸#anyway. lizzie is one of the like. three people i trust with zack cause they Get Him #this game is so so fun for me #because I either get to think about an au i've never thought about before. like this GOD TIER au. thank you lizzie 💓💓💓#or I get to ramble about one of the bajillion aus I already have #and i have some that are truly wild compared to canon #so i'm playing this game forever. like y'all can send me an au at literally any time and i will be thrilled #this made me so soft cause like. my dad was a mechanic. so it gave me a happy sense of nostalgia 🥺💓💓#like I can literally smell the shop he used to work in lmao #anyway. I might add more to this later cause I have serious issues aslkdjf #and things keep popping into my head

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wibblyparfait · 1 year

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normally i'd wait to post doodles n just do it all in one go but. ysee ive been having Ilis brainrot and i need to ramble abt all the lil factoids thatve formed since the last time i yelled abt them 🏃‍♂️ SHDBDB

(aka OC Rambles under the cut BUT otherwise. enjoy the manager treating Ilis to some better ego for once. theyd still rather wear the Rudolta suit cuz They R Making A Statement BUT yk!!! kinda swag to have some better drip every so often!!! or at least their Sephirot seems to think so <3 SHFJDJFB!!!!!!!)

HI. ITS ALL UNHINGED RAMBLES FROM HERE.

Hes an orphan!! which. shouldnt b surprising cuz The City Sure Is A Fuck but!!! at least in his orphanage he had two mom figures as his caretakers 👍!!!!!

Said orphanage was p well off for a while so thats how he. could afford a fuck-it expense like a tail augment but ofc that status couldnt rly last + he just!!! wanted to repay his moms for taking care of him so!!!! into Abnorm Capitalism he goes!!!!!

Honestly?? just vibing for the most part. Yea sure its hellish being in a place where u can die anytime from wack ass monsters but!!! being on the resident Everything Is Fine And Ok In Welfare team + on Talk To The Abnorms To Keep Them Happy duty w Attachment work does wonders for this silly extroverted mfer :)

Now no one tell him that cuz of the whole time fuckery inside the facility hes probably died a million times from all sorts of usual LobCorp deaths and that all his hard work might b for naught since his moms + the orphanage mightve been fucked over by Usual City Happenings while hes been away oops-

Its fine!! Everything’s fine!!! Ilis is living their best life as stated earlier!!!! maybe a little too good of a life since theyre a lil too eager to help sometimes and just Asserts Assistance more often than not but!!! hey it works out for his coworkers so >:)!!!!

(the only thing the Manager wont let him assert assistance on is working with Alephs but. lets b real thats a blessing cuz Ilis would teach Blue Star how to do a lil boogie/J AKJHGHGFDJD)

ACTUALLY SPEAKING OF OTHER CURSED THINGS im so sorry he doesnt like strong coffee </3 sacrilege to the Welfare team i know/J (re: dw ik Chesed’s rly chill abt coffee dislikers but despite being a Chesed-kisser he’ll have an americano (aka coffee-flavored water/J) at best and prefers fizzy drinks otherwise 😩 DFKGJHFD)

And while im thinking abt ops on Sephirah. ngl Ilis woulda loved to work with either Disciplinary or Training at first since!!! those departments line up w/ how he feels most helpful (re: taking care of abnorms b4 they can do harm + teaching ppl w protocols) BUT he was transferred to Briah b4 he could properly meet Hod and is still too much of a coward to properly face abnorms on the front line (+ now thinks he would get vaporized by Gebura for that/J) so. whoops 🤷

ITS OK ENDING UP IN WELFARE TURNED OUT RLY WELL AS MENTIONED EARLIER. HES DOING GREAT THERE N WOULDNT RLY WANNA SWITCH DEPARTMENTS NOW ANYWAY >:))

and now. the part where i get even more unhinged over incoherent OCxCanon thoughts (why is their ship name Chilis why is their ship name Chilis why is th-/JJ/LH DFKGJFD)

Honest to god theyre both hopeless workaholics what the fuck. but also at least Ilis refuses to let Chesed cover some of his work and goes to take his mug back to the breakroom whenever hes done dminking/brings him some more coffee as soon as hes back from Sephirah meetings n whatnot ✨ and whenever Ilis is inevitably lying face-down on the ground after a long day’s work + avoiding abnorms breaching left and right Chesed needs no other excuse to let him rest in a safe room and offer a warm drink of choice to help ease the exhaustion :)

(pre-core suppression there prolly isnt much for Chesed to do anyway + It Is Not Fun Possibly Watching This One Nugget That Never Stops Trying To Lend A Hand To Anyone And You Included Die Over And Over In How Many Loops but. shh post-suppression he can finally let himself get attached proper and let Ilis support him and his new resolve Not Just Cuz It Apparently Makes Ilis Happy To Help And He Might As Well Keep His Employees Happy However He Can but also cuz everything he does is appreciated in general 🥺)

(meanwhile jumpcut to Ilis generally having his shit together and being the emotional support in LC despite his Chaotic Workaholism Tendencies until he finds out afterwards + possibly in Ruina that. gestures to the point abt his moms and the orphanage. but shh thats for future me to figure out i havent gotten that far yet KFDGJD)

ACTUALLY WAIT SPEAKING OF RUINA u know how the assistant librarians have to get used to using actual weapons instead of the ego ones?? stares at Ilis possibly getting physically stronger. stares at him Looking At His BF With Affectionate Ill Intent. get carried 4head >:)

(lets b real Ilis has prolly been waiting to Commit Carry cuz. he rly looked at a marketable box and went “yeah thats friendshaped i wonder if i can pick that up like a cat” KFDGFKDJ)

in general can u tell Ilis is the more outwardly affectionate one?? even if tables get turned he just starts vibrating in place like JFHFDKGHDKJ!!!!!!!!! (<- Happi.) hes just like that <3 (tho tbf Chesed doesnt rly seem like the type to get flustered and esp not once hes living his somewhat-best-life in Ruina but shh let Ilis get :)!!!! whenever his affections and unprompted favors r accepted in stride 😌 KFJFGFD)

actually wait while im still thinking abt Ruina it must b weird seeing Ilis w/o the Void Dream gift BUT that is also a problem for future me 👍

IN THE MEANTIME BACK TO UNHINGED SILLIES Ilis is the type to talk to abnorms hes working with like. Fragment of the Universe could say some incoherent mindmelting shit and theyd just b there scribbling important notes into their clipboard while also going “right thats exactly what ive been saying :O”/JJJ DFGKHFDKJ

also if it wasnt obvious Ilis’ tail is prehensile. as an augmentation it prolly has some combat functionality but for the most part he either uses it to drag coworkers away during serious emergencies or have it wag for him during silly moments KJHFGF

Double Also. theres no actual reason he covers his eye (for now perhaps.) its just. style yk 😌 JFJDHGKDF

AND WITH THAT. FINALLY IVE RAMBLED ALL MY THOUGHTS SOMEWHERE. GOODBYE GOODNIGHT I WILL CONTINUE TO BE UNNORMAL ONCE I CAN DOODLE MORE WHEN IM NOT INCREDIBLY BUSY IRL FDFHGFKJ

#Lobotomy Corporation OC #OC Art #Original Character #Parf2023 #i. spent like 2 hours typing all this what the fuck why do i have so many thoughts/JJ DKGFJK

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beamingmaylyn · 4 years

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eat ramen with me - jjk || part 29

(text under the pictures)

warnings : swearing, fingering, spanking (ig), oral (f receiving), dirty talk (like very poorly written, its barely there)

Jeongguk isn’t one to share his clothes, but I would have to guess I’m an exception. Here I was, sitting on his couch in one of his giant hoodies and a pair of my thigh high socks. When he picked me up at the shop and saw that I had spent the night in a dress with bare shoulders, he freaked on the spot. “You’re going to get a cold!” He said before forcing a cup of boiling tea in my hands which were covered by the long sleeves of his hoodie. If it was oversized on him I didn’t even want to know what it looked like on me. Along with the tea, he sat beside me and stuffed dumplings into my mouth.

“You’re so cute…look like a little peach.” His hands were gently squishing my dumpling-filled cheeks. After eating, he took off the blotchy makeup I didn’t manage to last night. After all, all I had was water and cotton pads, and makeup and water don’t work well together.

“I’m not sick, Gguk!” I whined pulling down his palm from my forehead. “Hmm…I don’t know. Let me check your temperature again.” I was being pulled into his lap when his lips pressed a long kiss to my less-than-warm forehead.

Conversation died down as we watched a random Netflix show while cuddling. My head was resting on his shoulder and my face buried in his neck. As soon as my lips touched his neck, his warm hand slipped under my sock and squeezed my thigh. I sucked on his ear lobe and tugged on his earrings, which is what I realized gets him going over the past couple of days.

I found myself, almost subconsciously, gripping the lower part of his shirt, but he took my hand in his and intertwined our fingers. It was the little things, like the stroking of his thumb on my hand, that raised my heartbeat.

My heart didn’t lose its intense pace when he let go of my hand to grip my jaw and bring our lips together. Almost immediately his tongue met mine.

“Mm, the dumplings were good, huh?” “You’re gross.” “Hey! I didn’t even get to try one, let me enjoy this.” Then I kissed him again.

“Can you sit differently peach? My leg is going numb.” If this boy interrupts one more time I swear. “I can sit on the floor if you’d like.” I stood up and leaned down to rest my hands on his knees. What I didn’t expect though, was rejection. “Not today, let me take care of you this time.” Both of us were now standing, and his hands gently held mine. Though the eye contact we held was intense.

Was I ready? Whatever I say next determines the outcome of the situation. I trusted him, so why was this decision so difficult? With the thoughts running through my brain my eyes dropped from his and were now looking at the floor.

“If you’re uncomfortable it’s totally fine. I mean it’s not fine because that means I’m the one that made you uncomfortable and that’s totally not cool of me as a boyfriend and as a friend. I didn’t mean to pressure you, I just thought you wanted it as much as I do because you’ve been making me feel good for the past 2 days and I finally manned up enough and I want to return the favor-“

“Gguk please, you’re rambling.” I brought my hands to his face and gently cupped his cheeks, focusing his big concerned eyes on the smile on my face. “You’ve never made me uncomfortable, of course I want it. I just…It’s really not that big of a deal but, I don’t work out and dance my ass off every day.” I tried to hint at the dumb reason, not wanting to explain myself.

“You don’t have to have a six-pack and big biceps for me to think you’re gorgeous!” He smiled brightly at me before engulfing me in a hug and swaying us around. “Keep the hoodie on and cover my head, it will be like nothing is even happening.”

Minutes later I was lying over Gguk’s lap, biting the sleeves of the hoodie and whining like a desperate bitch. He was knuckles deep with two fingers, not even moving them in and out at this point, but crooking them and pressing on my g-spot. “God, these stockings…You look so fucking good in them.” He groaned and harshly groped my thigh, giving it a gentle smack right on the exposed skin. The smack didn’t even sting, but it still made me clench around his fingers. “Dirty girl.” He commented against my head while giving it a small kiss. All my hair was moved to one side so he could kiss my ear. “Can I eat you out?”

In what world I wouldn’t let Gguk eat me out, I don’t know. So now, my head was buried between my crossed arms while my whiny moans filled the big living room. Gguk was sitting behind me spreading my cheeks and enjoying himself, with a pillow under my hips to give himself leverage. His big hands were rough on my skin, and the reactions his touches and movements provided made me feel and look like a virgin. It felt so good I was almost shaking.

“Feel good, peach?” He mumbled against me, sending electricity down my legs. “Mhmm, feels so good.” I slurred incoherently against the sleeves of his hoodie. I’ve been blabbering utter nonsense for the past 10 minutes, dirtying up the hoodie he so kindly offered with the wetness pooling in my mouth.

“Fuck.” I whined in a high tone when he slipped two fingers in knuckle deep and spread them. He stayed like that for a few seconds, just staring at my sex with admiration. If I learned one thing from this experience, it’s that Jeon Jeongguk is whipped for pussy.

“What a fuckin’ peach.” I barely caught what he said, and smiled into my elbow. It wasn’t meant for me to hear, it was just a mere observation passing through his head. The smile was smacked off my face with a light swat of his hand on my ass. Oh, so that’s the peach he was talking about.

“Come on, I’ve seen the way you smack your hyungs. I’m sure you can hit harder than that.” I taunted him with a wiggle of my hips. Gguk is a competitive guy, we been knew. Whenever I challenge his abilities, even with a mere ‘can you do this baby?’, he steps up and proves his golden status.

“Please don’t bring my hyungs into this.” He whined before landing a harsh smack on my right butt cheek. When he saw the reaction I provided, he landed a few more before softly rubbing and kissing at the red and hot skin. He was taking his sweet ass time, and being the brat I am, I whined and wiggled my hips.

“You’re an impatient girl aren’t you, hm?” His lips were now delicately kissing my folds before he slipped in his tongue. I’m not sure who taught him the shit he was pulling down there, but I couldn’t be more grateful.

A few minutes of attention to my clit brought tears to my eyes and a shakiness to my hips. ��“Mm, ‘m close,” I mumbled as the tears began to slowly trickle down my face, and into the sleeves.

Much to my dismay, he stopped and delivered a smack to my ass, making me jolt.

“Sit on my lap.” I finally got a glance at him. His slightly longer-than-usual hair was messy, his pink pouty lips were the pinkest and shiniest I’d ever seen them be, and his dick was setting up camp and pitching a tent under his pants. He was also shirtless. Not sure when that happened but you’ll never catch me complaining.

My back was pressing into his hard chest, and my ass was pressing into his hard cock. What I would do to have him inside…

The gentle grip of his hand on the underside of my knee cut my flow of thoughts. My other leg was bent and resting on his thigh. His hand was slowly caressing its’ way down my body, which suddenly made me hyperaware of his harsh breathing on my neck. His lips were right against my ear, and it immediately turned me into putty. When his fingers finally grazed my clit, my head fell back on his shoulder and I looked up at his desperately.

He smiled down at me teasingly and kissed me. He took the opportunity of me being whipped for his plush lips to push two fingers inside. I clenched my stomach and gently bit down on his lip.

Soon enough he was moaning praises and words of encouragement into my ear, slipping in a few bites, licks, and kisses between the words.

“Does it feel good, peach? You like being played with like this?” He mumbled into my neck while kissing it. It was like my mouth and brain lost contact and all I could do was whine and shake.

“You’re close, huh? I’m gonna have to push you over the edge, aren’t I?” He sucked a small lilac bruise right behind my ear and I barely managed to keep my neck upright.

With the last ounce of energy I had in me, I arched my back and reached behind me to grip his hard cock. When I stroked my hand up and down his pants, he snapped his wrist hard and pushed his fingers even deeper. It was a game-changer when he added a third finger and roughly moved all three in unison. My orgasm finally hit with the grinding of the edge of his palm against my clit.

I firmly gripped his hard-working forearm with one arm, and messily intertwined the fingers of his free hand with my other hand.

“There you go peach, fuck.” He moaned into my ear when I shook against him and helped me slowly ride it out. I expected him to stop, though he was slowly but surely starting to purposely overstimulate me.

“Gguk.” I whined and moved my hips in an attempt to stop him, but he didn’t budge. Our intertwined hands were wrapped around my waist so he could pin me to him. He stopped in panic when he felt the wetness of my tears on his neck.

He slowly pulled his fingers out and looked into my eyes with a worried look in his.

“It’s too much.” I whimpered with my eyebrows furrowed. He caressed the side of my face and kissed my forehead. “But it feels so good.”

With a smirk wide on his lips, his fingers went back to work.

part 29 - i hate it here

prev || next

eat ramen with me masterlist

summary : you keep getting texts from a random number and decide not to go against the will of the universe

a/n : i hope y’all were pleased with the smut ajsjadah its not so great🥴,, and im sorry for the wait! i’ll try to hurry with the next part (shoutout to @inangellocumlibello for helping me with this, shes a real one🥳)

taglist - if you want to be added send me an ask or a message, this way you'll be notified when i post new parts

@yoongisabby @lovelymultiwrites @ambersaesthetics @actuallyada @sterynlis @illwritetomorrow @snortyport @nerdycookiemonster-1222 @squeakermarie @gguksfilter @betysotelo18

@charlotte-1206 @serahtonin @momma-said-that-it-was-oke @lyndseygoregasmxo @jinhitwhore @lecosepiurare @angelic-kiss3s

@seungcheoluwu @sarangayyyyy @moonlight-silent @kb-bangtanenthusiast @mysingularitybts @ganderson10 @fuckjjk97

@jiholeen @soggy-taters @cafeyeoli @jalyssa-wyssaa @gittydakitty @alterlovess @itsrapmonstanotdancemonsta @krystle1990 @aitne-luna @icy-booh @euphxriajoon @pityandchiil @kookiesbreaky @mayafravoli @gracefulevijlsoul @littlewolfieposts @veronawrites @awkwardgreeting @kelitt @irenebutfancier @intohobiverse

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ncvcmbcrflush · 4 years

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It is 1am and i just finished s2, so this is gonna be long and rambling and misspelled and im sorry okay?

I am not thrilled with the writing of klaus this season, can I just say? They completely undid all of his substantial development in s1, while also removing a good chunk of his positive qualities.

There were scenes where s1!klaus shined through (any of the scenes with Allison and vanya, mainly, and i was really worried abt the scenes with bby!Dave but they were handled really well imo) but those scenes were vastly overshadowed by the unnecessary cruelty? Why did they make my boy so mean this season, I am asking this question for real. S1!klaus was wild and a disaster and heartbreaking, but he was also so kind, and willing to grow as a person in ways that his siblings actively avoided most of the time.

How do you go from beautifully empathetic s1!klaus crying in response to his abusive father's suicide, protesting luther locking up vanya and later being so adamant that they take vanya back in time with them that he literally clings to her feet, to s2!klaus who seems to not care much about anything or anyone at all?? The man is dead in heaven with his father telling him point blank what a let down he is, and he still has enough love in him to cry for him, but 3 years pass and suddenly he doesn't shed a tear for his brother who just died saving their sister?? They took away so much of his emotionality and I do not understand why.

S1!klaus also absolutely would have been open to trying possession with Ben imo, and we could have avoided the intensely uncomfortable possession sequence, which should not have been played off as a joke because it wasn't funny at all, and instead just highlights how little autonomy klaus actually has- but that is a rant that needs way more brain power and research lmao.

S1!klaus also would never have hid ben from his siblings, after spending literal years telling them that ben was there with them??? He would not have done that.

And the scene where they try to save vanya was intensely ooc in my opinion- even high off his ass klaus is quick to react and jump into action- helpful or otherwise (throwing the fire extinguisher, improvising at the prosthetics lab for 5, trying to save luther in the club, running into the theater when they hear gunshots despite having no idea how to use his powers offensively, even in s2 when he finds allison at the protest) and I refuse to believe he would need to be pushed into trying to save vanya, who he has put his life at risk to save before.

The cult thing will be getting a post of its own because I have so many feelings about that whole deal but I again, am too incoherent currently.

I loved him and allison so so much, and he and vanya just break my heart together bc they are such opposite sides of the same coin and the show doesn't seem interested in exploring that whatsoever? I was a bit bummed to not really see him interact with the boys at all though. He and Diego seemed pretty close in s1, 5 and klaus have some good scenes together, and he and luther had some good interactions at the end of s1 as well, and i wish they had kept going with that.

It just feels like they were so busy with the others, and klaus got lost along the way. We do nothing with his powers except for the possession thing, like literally besides ben and the two ghosts at the very end of the last episode klaus doesn't use his powers at all during the entire season! I loved watching everyone else kind of come into their own, but that just never happened for klaus this season- if anything, he devolved.

And I think as a side effect of fucking up klaus, they fucked up his relationship with ben, and the other boys to a lesser extent, as well.

S1 ben and klaus is what i would expect from a pair of siblings stuck together for 17 years- nagging and sarcastic and judgemental but also loving and close and they work well together. They are both dumbasses who do things like play patty cake to test ben's tangibility, and decide that tossing a bowling ball is a good way to prove that ben is present.

S2 ben and klaus are entirely antagonistic; more in line with luther and diego in s1. I have seen lots of comments saying that anyone upset with ben and klaus's dynamic in s2 doesn't have siblings, and to that i have to say- people who think their dynamic in s2 is normal don't have abusive parents. There are lines that you absolutely do not cross, and comparing a sibling to your abuser is one of them. And you don't need to have siblings to know that dismissing the death of a loved one like, isn't a good thing to do? This is especially jarring given their relationship in 2019 and as children- there is no set up for this kind of behavior from either of them.

And the others were just so overall dismissive of klaus in a way that goes beyond just sibling annoyance. During the family dinner no one bats an eye when ben jumps into him, causes his body to jerk around, and literally says that he's ben?? He lies on the floor of the elevator looking like death and we don't so much as ask what's wrong? Klaus pukes out the contents of 7 fully grown humans practically and no one offers a tums, or a ride to the damn hospital?? Like wasn't diego a fuckin cop, he should know that none of this is the result of an overdose??? As far as i can recall,, klaus doesn't even use drugs in this season? We see him drink but that's it unless I'm forgetting, which is entirely possible since it is now 2am lmao. And they just play it off as jokes, we are meant to find this funny?

And just like, he wasn't involved in the actual plot of this season much, if at all, besides being a largely unwilling catalyst for ben. Nothing would change in this season if they had cut him out completely, and i really hate that.

I'm not upset at all really- despite sounding upset and writing a long ass rant lmao- the let down of one character doesn't ruin the season for me, and honestly, given how other shows have failed me this year (looking at you, the politician) , i count this season as a win overall. Luther especially has changed so much for the better, and he was probably the highlight of this season. I'm just bummed because klaus was s u c h a good character in season one, easily one of the most interesting characters, and they did nothing with him this season.

#tua season 2 #tua season two #tua #the umbrella academy #tua spoilers #tua rant #i had feelings im sorry #coherant breakdown coming soon lmao #tua salt #it's not really salt but also it is? idk #klaus hargreeves

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ramblingshit · 5 years

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Persuasion 1995

The incoherent rambling commentary of a 3am viewing.

we start in a boat -- wait have i done this one before -- who cares CIARAN HINDS BBYYYY. I have sheep too just in my front yard ya know. that's just how it be. here's some boats - i can see where they pasted the fake boats in teh background i love it .calm nice piano music. dude is cutting the lawn people out here with top hats and wigs. oh dear everyone pissy SHOW ME THE MONEYYYY. lots of wigs and coats and here's a lady in a turban she's definitely the worldy kind. sailors n shit sitting drinking wine and smoking. oh god who's this. i can't hear the dialogue over my laptop fan. this ol mate's a fop i hate his voice. oh dear he's supposed to be a moron huh. oh whoops the fop is a baronet and he is poorr lol sucked in he got debtss extreme debts you musssttt retreennnnnchh. the neighbours be tryna help out and hereeee is Anne eyy. wow eatin grapes and sorbet and they're goin to Bath. he hates sailors and now he has to be ol mate's tenant. ohh Anne knows about the admiral and this fop keeps talking nonsense. a lady with no children has the best furniture. WENTWORTH she gasps. and she is dramatic and sad, puts her tea down takes a breath by the window and comes back takes up her tea and sits down damn. aww Ann---OH 'since no one will want you in bath its best you stay here!' what a fkn bitch what is happening. ITS AUNT PETUNIAA. naww anne is so cute and petite and so miserable. her sister looks cruel and stupid and her dad is just as bad honestly. damn they got Greek statues in their giant house. her sister. is. a . bitch. fuck me. give her like two lists and tells her to go visit everyone in the parish. damn all the peeps glared at him as he left like give us the money you foppish twat. Poor Anne, that is a fkn big ass house. everyone's watching em leave. ohhh cows. oop packing up the house, sheets over the furniture, she's lucky they got like a thousand servants. she's found something in teh box - it's a letter in the shape of a boat ooh i wonder who its from. she's been miserable for years; she hates Bath; her mum's dead and everything went to shit after that - her dad's a moron, her sister's a bitch, she's out here gonna fixedly avoid risking meeting him. Lady Russell - she's the one tsk tsk. oooh Annneeeee she is persuaded despite disapproval and anxiety of his prospects - she was 19 and she wanted to fuck and Lady Russell told her to fuck him off because he was a peasant damn fuck Lady Russell; she just brushes Jane off like shut up little girl I'm right you're wrong move on dumbass. And Anne's like, did you not hear me - i literally just tried to tell you I hate my fucking life and I miss him and I love him and I kinda resent you for telling me to say no. More sheep and a puppy, and close up view of sheep. dad and sister got to ride in a fancy carriage and Anne has to ride in a wagon that's a bit rough. I like her bonnet. oh my god her sister i love her. 'i am soooooooo ill' - she's searching for attention; lonely and miserable and sad and a little bitter. Mary you poor girl leave Anne alone none of that emotional manipulation. 'oh i was very well yesterday, it's just today' yeah alright. sounds like Charles isn't as rich as the Elliots and Mary's not happy about it. ohh i know this lady and of course Anne can play piano very well and everyone knows it -- Mary tryna cut in like yes i'm as accomplished as Anne and they're awkward like ehhhh but we like watching you dance and Anne doesn't dance so there you go and she sits there with an awkward cringe 'no'. Mary goes off and sulks and Charles rolls his eyes. The Musgroves are rich and friends ohmygod Mary don't be embarrassing in your bitterness yikes and we cut and Mary was there but now Mrs Musgrove and Anne are sitting in teh same spot - I like Mrs M's dress, even the lace around her shoulders that matches the hat I don't know it just seems refined or something. There's lots of very swift conversations - good pace just like my fingers and brain can't keep up yo. Yikes Mrs M thinks Mary is a shit mum; Mary says Mrs M riles em up with lollies; Charles says Mary interferes and fancies herself ill; Mrs M tells the kids are so naughty the only way to keep em chill is to feed them cake; dunno who this girl is (Henrietta?) anyway the brown haired petite one, they're sitting in the window, Anne's finished her tea by now damn how is she so casually moving from person to person how long have they been chillin with the Musgroves? anyway she's tea-less and talking with brown-haired-possibly-Henrietta: wants Mary to stop being rude over Mrs M even though she has precedent to no one likes her for it; blondish sister now and Anne's got more tea and this one says Mrs M's not one for etiquette she just wants cake lmaooooo; Mary is superior and wants her to persuade Charles that she is very very ill. Anne and Charles sigh on the couch together. Now only Charles has got a tea. okay never mind Mary's a bit more like her sister than I thought. oh my god kids ew. it's petunia looking high as a kite ahaha i wish i was her naw petunia was like idc bout your sister I wanted to meet you btw ol mate is married and Anne's like kill me now I guess. she's horrified, shocked, wants to find an ant hill to bury herself in. god mary's a bitch i take back everything i said about her but all is well Anne has a new friend. she's got a very good memory, Anne does, naw and she's good with her nephews. what's this girls name plz tell me oh it is Henrietta. oh damn they're invited to the house tonight to 'meet Mr Frederick WEntowORTH by ALL aCOunts a most CHarMinG anD agreEable GeNtlemAn' Anne could not look more uspet. fixing her hair in the mirror - there's boys screaming ohh no a child what's happened oh god Mary's screaming for Anne the boy has broken his collarbone - she's knowledgeable chatting with the doctor - Charles marches in like wtf my dumbass kid out here falling out of trees - it's his first born the kid looks so fkn miserable that's hilarious now he's off to dinner cause -- oh damn i forgot they wear gloves. this kid's just lying there. ahah Mary doesn't give a fuck about her kids she just wants to be in on everything -- damn--"you are the properest person to sit with the boy. but you haven't a mothers feelings, have you?' like BITCH she's just offered to sit here so you can go to dinner and you're out here being a fucking cunt for no reason? gtfo. and the scene just changes with that damn savage leave Anne be she deserves better than this. oh damn i know that cheekbone. Anne's been out here watching this kid all night like literally and Mary shrugs off that Wentworth barely asked after her because they're barely acquaintances and says he and Charles are out shooting and Anne's tense like uhh they're not coming here tho right and just as Mary's like nah BAM SURPRISE BITCH o no O NO and THERE HE IS DRAMATIC ZOOM HE DOESNT EVEN LOOK AT HER SHE LOOKS TERRIFIED, HE BARELY GLANCES AT HER, doesn't talk to her, she grips the chair tight fuck he's hot. another swift glance and he's gone. dramatic zooms all around. Mary returned, didn't even look at her injured child who has a big ass cut on his face who's just sitting in the corner looking plain and miserable and wentworth - "you were so altered he would not have known you again' - scene cuts to her sitting in front of a mirror looking fucking sadddddd. they're all at dinner together fuck me he is so hot my god. the girls are all over him and he's enchanting everyone with his stories and of course the reason why he first went out comes up and he's like 'i was extremely keen... to be at sea. i was extremely keen. i badly wanted to be doing something.' the PAIn in his eyes, the tight swallow as he turned to listen to the Admiral, who sits Right next to Anne who's sorta just sitting with wide eyes staring at the salad bowl. then the admiral leans over 'when a man has no wife he wants to be afloat again' and she's like yeah wow ah ha ha ah 'yes well i had no wife - pity the essex (?? dunno what that means but I GET THE POINT)" and then he looks at her properly for the first time and i want to die and she wants to die and he wants to die and we are all quite miserable where we are BUT WE ARE ONLY A HALF HOUR IN and we move on talkin bout his ship crap just wait im eating chocolate but i have many thoughts. sorry honestly theres no time to take a breath in this movie i love it but damn it doesn't give one enough time to write and snack. RIGHT - ol mate's declared he'll never have a woman on his ship because its not pink and frilly enough and petunia's stepped in like fkn excuse me m8 wanna say that again? and also is Anne and petunia related because they are looking very similar to me right now??? they're not related. alright pulling us back yet again, I'm so sorry this is a mess I'm eating chocolate at 1 am and watching Persuasion, I think you can guess how my day has been. they keep talking about him getting married and he laughs and jokes it off and then excuses himself like yeah real smooth yeeting yourself outta here dude at that certain topic hanging around. naww the only time petunia felt scared or bad was when she was away from her husband this is adorable. ol mate's tryna play the piano to the amusement of the girls, sees Anne sneaking up to listen and immediately hurries outta there, face pale never moved so fast in his life i bet and they all follow him and she just sits down and starts playing while everyone dances. for people who were so refined they danced like crazy people --- 'no never she has quite given up dancing' Wentworth's face falls and he looks at her and she looks away from him come on guys you are hurting me. some guy has just rocked up who the heck is Henry - a cousin? who is not --- 20,000 pounds fuck me. Charles and Mary; wait we're talking about Henry. oh my god, they're planning who's gonna marry who - Henrietta and lousia and henry and wentworth 'what say you Anne, which one is the Captain in love with? she laughs slightly - I've never seen someone so depressed before in my life, at least not in a romance . this is actually a really sad story ya know, Wentworth got rejected and fled to sea; and Anne rejected him and became depressed about it for years. damn. anyway these girls can't go anywhere without Mary butting in, now they're going for a long walk or something and Mary's forcibly inserted herself and they look at each other and the poor kid is sitting with his arm in a bandage that goes round his neck? with that scratch on his face and adorable little round glasses sitting at the table with some cake and a puzzle he's doing with Anne like please don't abandon the suffering child has he even had any panadol?? Who the hell is looking after this kid if they're all going on this long walk - now Charles and Wentworth too. Charles helps two of em over, Wentworth helps Louisa over the fence, and Anne has to help herself over, which she does without hesitation good girl you do you fam. yikes Charles and that are going to Winthrop or something where Charles' aunt lives and Mary's offended to have such connections and refuses to go and assures Wentworth she's only been there twice and he half-smiles politely. louisa came running up to take Wentworth wherever and he like turned around to look at Mary and Anne and Anne fkn spun around to avoid him just generally so smooth these two so smooth. Anne's looking around at like anything and everything except him. every time he's nearby she tenses up and skitters around like she's tryna hide in plain sight but also stand tall and brave and staring straight at him like she wants him to look at her so badly. 'we all wish that charles had married anne instead' 'did charles want to marry anne' 'did you not know' 'you mean she refused him' 'yes' ... 'my parents think it was Lady Russell's doing, that my brother not being philosophical enough for her taste she persuaded Anne to refuse him.' ohhhhhh. damn. Wentworth is very quiet. Mouth tight. Brow low. Anne's freaking out down the hill. Mary's just stolen her spot. Christ. It's chaos. Anne's stumbling along she's tired she's sad she's got the depression her sister's a nightmare, WEntworth doesn't care about her, she cares about him, everything is awful and she trips over some sticks and he turned to look at her, concerned out of his thoughts. Hey petunias back with her carriage and they're offering a seat and Wentworth like rushes over and whispers for them to take Anne and she catches it like wtf confusion she goes to protest and suddenly He's AT her SIDE and he doesn't even say anything and he leans his head down to hers for a moment with a gentle look on his face, putting a hand to her back and her brain just shuts down as he leads her to the carriage and hold her hip tight as he helps her up and she looks around in shock and he's staring straight forward like everything is chill and doesn't look at her again. oh wait petunia is wentworth's sister damn awesome but she doesn't think very well of him. oh they're going to Lime and they ask if Anne can come and I think Wentworth choked on his tea a little bit. and here's some establishing shots : the ocean. Some rocks with seaweed on them. The shittest 'beach' ive ever seen there's like boulders everywhere where's the sand? is that a teepee of seaweed? what Wentworth looks pretty happy about it though like he wants to jump in. I like Charles he's a funny dude. Wow that is one helluva hat Wentworth. All these fancy people going into a sailor's home like etiquette is what but everyone is chill with it except Mary of course. is Anne supposed to have her bonnet off? o no now she's chosen to be the nice depressed girl who tries to talk to the weird depressed guy who is too into poetry about death. cute they're all shoulder to shoulder around the guy's table. she starts getting the hint that this guys a bit off 'you cannot know the depths of my despair.' damn son get a therapist. ohh shittt 'you have no conception of what i have lost' 'yes I have' she says, and Wentworth is sitting there smoking what could be a blunt who can honestly say and he heard the whole thing. Wentworth and Louisa are doing a whole lot of hanging out. Like every time they actually speak to each other feels like a momentous occasion - they literally just said 'good morning' to each other and it feels like such a big step and her heads down and he's watching her BIG STEPS --oh shit some blonde haired guy that im sure will come up later tipped his hat to the girls and then Anne and Wentworth was coming up behind her and she looked over her shoulder to look at the BLondie but wentworth thought it was at him and he SMILED to himself nawwww. that looks like the house from Pride and Prejudice ahaha. whoop Blondie's back and she looked back at him again and now they're at breakfast ohmyGadh his eyes sparkle when he looks at her the few times he looks at her my god they're talking about Blondie who is apparently their cousin or something and he and mary and anne's father aren't on good terms and she tells Mary so and he looks over his bowl with those fkn sparklllinggg eyes and a playful smile and it doesn't even matter what he says just that look and he drinks his soup and licks his lips and looks up at her and she's just staring but like calmly not even freaking out and she lowers her eyes to her toast and just chills like all is well. whoop i think weird depressed guy is gonna propose but before he can whats up we're helping girls down some scary stairs yikes i'd sit my ass down going down those things. Louisa is being crazy oh fuckkkk ahahaha hahaSPLAT holy shit oh fuck weird depressed guy is standing in the background with his hands over his mouth Anne is in there with Charles and Wentworth damn she'd 100% be a doctor nowadays, Louisa the dumbass has smashed herself on the cobblestones and WEntworht is just freaking out and he is looking straight to Anne who is giving straight smart orders and he is following them without hesitation - the other women are crying they're all sitting around her while the doctor does like... something and Anne's the only one like hey we have shit to do like people gotta hear about this we don't have phones and her speaking makes Wentworth speak and Charles is in shock cause its his baby sister whose hurt. Once again she's looking after the injured person and she walks out and Wentworth is talking to Charles 'I think it should be Anne - no one so capable as Anne--' he cuts off when he sees her coming in 'I-we-you'll stay, won't you?' he stammers as she enters holy fuck my heart can't handle...they're just staring into each others eyes; in any other context man. he clarifies himself but fuck if they didn't think it. ah fuck Mary is so annoying crying that she should be the one to stay with Louisa like bitch you didn't even give a shit about your injured son let alone your sister-in-law wtf she needs a slap why are they listening to her. 'If only I -- if only--' he cries in the carriage 'yes.' Anne said, looking at him sadly. 'Anne... I regret that...' he looks at her once and again and again and she lowers her eyes and holds the sleeping Henrietta close. like honestly i feel like there's no problem writing their dialogue cause there is just so little of it and when it does happen all of it means everything. but anyway she doesn't answer him and I am sad and he is sad. 'damned foolish' he sa---wait holy shit SCREAAAAAAAMINGgGg fucking hell grab your torches and pitchforks Mrs Mudahwhatver is screaming and Wentworth is riding off in the rain and once again Anne is all alone and she stays up just walking around all night and playing the piano and yay Louisa is conscious and Anne continues to be depressed poor girl and you can tell because its raining. and its still raining and they're not back-- wait now she's in Bath and her fop father and bitch sister are lounging irritatingly and he says he's happy for her to have come because it will be an advantage to have four at dinner. things are white and gold - clean and unhomely and too perfect and the fop is calling everyone ugly - they're eating sorbet again ahaha yum. god they all look bored and miserable and here's blondie come to greet them and he glances at Anne, processes and then snaps back to stare at her in astonishment he's got nice hair and he continues to stare damn and she's so confident she just smiles and stares back I'm so jealous she can do that. oh mygod they're having an intimate conversation in front of her shitty family dude i know he'll probs turn out like a wickham character but one can have hope. damn that jaw-line tho. hmmm lady russell is back. i hate her hair. metal cups are odd - they make sense but so strange. Russell's got plans man Anne's telling her about how her bitch sister is after Blondie and Russell laughs and pats her cheek. Oh yay it's petunia! aw she hears the admiral is in poor health and she's immediately like what's wrong here come get some water. damn bitch sister 'she is nothing to me' damn whats about the screaming and the random rage bursts damn. oh and here's a viscountess why are they always fucked. Blondie and Anne are in the corner flirting crazily I know he's bad but like you can't fake this chemistry no one's that good. and suddenly she's surprised?0oh my god that suit. Mrs Smith oh my god she's adorable she and Nurse Rook are gossipers hell yeah 'there are no secrets in Bath' naw this better not be a Helen situation come on guys - oh fuck Louisa is gonna marry weird depressed guy?? and Anne is freaking thrilled. damn it rains a lot here. far out hats are crazy. Here's Blondie. Anne's so used to being verbally abused by her sister she doesn't respond -----holy damn its Wentworth walking down the street. Penelope is n---- oh fuck he just walked in -- she took a breath with her back to him then spun around HOWDY he looks shocked and delighted and she hse ewihpewjihp oh my god they love each other and they're so nervous and uncertain about it oh my god so awkward and cute please trying to go through the etiquette script oh no so cute 'im already armed for Bath' he grins and she laughs ----oh no. ... oh shit. Blondie just showed up and she just accepted Wentworth's umbrella everything was going so well stop awwww nooo his face falls, her face falls everything is awful. standing all solemn and glum by the window and all dressed in white looking shiny and gorgeous her little sack bag is weird but. and who is she looking for, I wonder. The family is standing awkward---there he be. tall and commanding and hmhmmm i love a man in uniform - she steps in front of him as he tries to pass him by. asks him if he's come for the concert - 'no ive come for a lecture on navigation am i in the wrong place' damn son no he's so good at making her laugh she never laughs oohh her family have to bow to him interesting - he's asking her how she's been since Lime I love them talking he starts on about being concerned about weird depressed guy getting married to Louisa because of his depression about his dead fiance 'a man does not recover to such a devotion to such a woman - he ought not; he does not' i'm sorry was that a declaration of love m8 omg Anne knows it too 'i should like to see it again' 'would you i would've thought i mean the distress, too painful' 'but when the pain is over...' dudes DUDES guys please guys 'It was my doing solely mine - Louisa would not have been obstinate if i had not been weak - Anne, I have never--' GUYS NO the fucking viscountess wandered in ruining everything and now he's gone please come back who cares about this lady singing i mean the candles look cool and but stop honestly who cares bring back Wentworth. omg fop is asleep, Anne and Blondie are bantering and she's not realising that she's pushing into flirting, again my god silly silly innocent naive and entirely relatable lol help. but there's Wentworth standing all tall and handsome in the corner and he looks so sad and meanwhile Blondie is like tryna propose and Wentworth is tryna yeet outta there and she's sprinting over to him tryna block his way tryna convince him to stay HOW THE TURN TABLES 'the next song is beautiful its a very beautiful love song is that not worth your staying for.' 'there's nothing worth my staying for.' kill me. Blondie needs to like there's no way he couldn't tell. Yay Charles is here! oh and Mary lol. Lol everyone is making decisions on what Louisa and Henrietta are gonna wear on their wedding day except they themselves?? And here is ol mate sweeping int eh room, smile briefly falling at the sight of Anne but everyone's happy to see them yay. mate what he just swept over to her talking softly ohmhwy god i don't think they've said anything directly to each other in their lives its all round the bend and metaphors and insinuations please kill me i love it he picks at her that she says she doesn't like the parties her family and Blondie give; 'they mean nothing to me' she has nothing in common with them and dislikes how they are, they're smiling at each other - oh shit Mr Elliott is out there meeting with her sister's friend or whatever now fkn Russell's tryna PERSUADE (ahaha) her into marrying Elliot 'that is not what I want!' Russell is shocked. now he's here looking stiff and snappy and awkward because the admiral has told him to invite her and her newly engaged Mr Elliot to his house and oh my god poor ol mate he wants to yeet away into the sunset goodbye world fuck you all 'if you wish it all you have to do is give me a yes or a no and we are both released' 'the admiral is too kind...' 'just say it: yes or no.' fuck you jane austen. Anne is overwhelmed and stormed off Russell faces Wentworth, he sneers her name, she smiles serenely 'You have an extraordinary ability to discompose my friend sir' , he twitches ' you have an extraordinary ability to influence her ma'am for which I find it hard to forgive you.' damn and then the scene ends damn. she's run off to Mrs Smith and Nook I love em she's ranting about everyone thinking she's gonna marry this guy and they're astonished and relieved cause he is poor and living on loans - he wants her for her money, title and lands thank god she's got her friends eyyy yasss. naw petunia and mrs musgrove are here my favs. Wentworth is writing a letter. whever they're in the room she can't help but look at him. she's talking with weird depressed gyu's fiance's brother - he's bitter that he's moved on so fast - she wouldn't have, its not in her nature, 'it would not be in the nature of any woman who truly loved.' 'do you claim that for your sex?' 'we do not forget you as soon as you forget us.' blah blah about women being stuck at home because people were shit to us back then fuck the patriarchy and all that. Fiance's brother says women and men are the same in being inconstant and forgetting those they love or have loved. Their convo gets interrupted by Wentworth knocking the whatever it is that they sprinkle over ink to dry it off the table and everyone's like dude the fuck we don't own vacuum cleaners you know. Fiance's brother says he's not read a book in his life that didn't have something to say on women's fickleness. 'but they were all written by men.' she argues. they laugh. he's on about going off to sea and being the victim cause he has to leave his family behind and boohoo it's so hard for me to be away from them even though i'm the one choosing to go away. yikes too close to home. anyway lolol. She says that above all, women are the ones who love the longest when all hope is gone. they all left, he snuck back and put out a letter on the desk, gave her a look and then left. she pretty much threw herself at it OH MY GOD THE LETTTTTTTTERRRRRRRR dudes dudes dudes dudes deud ed dud oh ymf theihwhes 'where are you going' 'i hardly know' ihowyiqruhoijpfg0hurbj3ifjpgrn Charles just keeps on standing between them and chattering finally gets it tips his hat and trots off wringing his hands. those eyes - he offers a hand, he takes it - i tried to forget you, i thought i had. they kiss very slowly, very gently, very chastely. his hair all windswept like that is very becoming - the way she slowly ran her hands over his arm before tucking it into his --- aand now there is a very random festival procession what and they're walking down the empty street. okay cool fine. she wanders into the gaming room or whatever, the camera mans shadow spreading all over the place, her sister grabs her and tells her not to monopolise wentworth - there's another war coming? oh how romantic. 'MY PROPOSAL OF MARRIAGE TO YOUR DAUGHTER ANNE HAS BEEN ACCEPTED.’ he fucking beams. everyones shocked. 'Anne? You want to marry anne, whatever for?' he just grins at the fop. And now she's on a ship and they're sailing off to war, oh how romantic. and there you go.

ya know before this 1-3am viewing i wouldve given this a 4/5 or even 4.5/5, but now I’m gonna give it a 3/5. there’s just something about it thats a bit... idk. still really like it but also.. yeah.

#rambling shit #rambling #shit #commentary #persuasion #1995 #ciaran hinds #amanda root #fiona shaw #petunia dursley #review #very tired #movies #movie #period movie #eyy #persuasion 1995

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frdknsll-blog · 6 years

Text

imagine the most serious character you know

now imagine them getting scared by the toaster going off as they walk by

⋆ ◦ ° ☾ joel kinnaman + male + he/his — have you met ford kinsella? they are thirty eight years old known around town as the bodyguard. they’ve been in the gang life for fifteen years, and currently work for the gang as a soldier. they are a pansexual virgo, which means they are practical + observant, as well as harsh + inflexible. rusty metal crow bar, beech forest in the winter, messages on read.

BIO:

born in valdez. his crackhead mom named him ford because she found him in the boot of a ford fiesta whilst she was robbing it. he was a one way ticket to claim some golden benefits.

had a string of men come in and out of their home like a revolving door who were just as bad as her or worse. ford was still protective of his mum, despite all her shit, and he paid for it.

grew up in a lil trailer park in some dodgy area. a real small community. guy ritchie snatch vibes. he heard stories of kids at school playing ball in the garden but the kids from the trailers fought each other for fun.

he only knew the difference bc he actually went to school. occasionally. he enjoyed learning and thought he’d be able to get on the right path. rip. kept to himself at school, quiet. never threw the first punch but his first was always the last.

the community attempted to overthrow the ‘monsters’ that controlled valdez. stupid.

resulted in one big throw down betw the two groups on ford’s home ground. by the time the caito’s gang were finished - mind you it didn’t take them long - the majority of the ppl ford grew up with were either dead, in the back of police cars, or on the run...

at the age of nineteen, he was thrown into jail. had already gone to juvie a few times. after he’d established his reputation as someone that didn’t like being started on bc it meant he had to finish them? it wasn’t too bad. he got to read, smoke, and read more.

one night, he’d saved the life of a guy who’d been cornered by some inmates. turns out he was the son of a guy pretty high up in the gang. he offered a ‘get out of prison’ card to ford but he declined. the outside world didn’t appeal to him.

until news reached him that the gang had found his girlfriend. immediately he asked to be let out. it took a while but by the time he got out things weren’t how he expected.

she was too far gone. a splitting image of his mother. when he found out that they had a kid, and that the kid was no where to be found, he thought it’d be the end of their relationship. but he couldn’t bring himself to give up on her.

she was a hooker and he’d spent his days trying to protect her, save her from herself. until one day it all got too much and he drove himself mad. a customer laid hands on her and ford murdered him.

caito and his gang came to ford’s protection. but everything came at a price. he began working for the gang officially and it only felt natural to do so - he couldn’t find a job anywhere else, and since his release he’d been doing small jobs to get by here and there.

she died from an overdose not long after. we don’t talk about it.

now he mostly works as a guard to the escorts/strippers. and the odd job here and there during the day. he prefers working on his own.

PERSONALITY:

he’s not angry. or sad. or anything. he’s just tired and pretty over it.

not a man of many words. talks with his eyes and incoherent grumbles: stop talking, step away, can you pass me the salt, this coffee is too hot, do you want my jacket, are you okay...

one cool, calm, collected, callous, cold c*nt. all the c’s. oh and a clean freak.

doesn’t get drunk, doesn’t do drugs. what a bore. v strict with himself. has a set of rules and sticks to them, expects others to do the same or at least respect them.

v patient but has zero tolerance. no manners, raised by rabid dogs lbr.

has a 2g phone. seriously a granddad. likes quiet, peace, serenity. wants to get things done as quickly and as cleanly as possible. doesn’t actually like having to resort to violence but it’s rly the only thing he knows.

likes wood carving. has a collection of ornaments he’d carved. honestly would probably even like knitting if he’d give it a chance tbh.

has just learned to detach himself from everything. lowkey dissociating half the time. honestly has no sense of humour.

super private. u aint gettin anything out from him about his past or personal life. loljk he has no personal life.

POTENTIAL PLOTS:

he doesn’t rly have friends. ppl he’s used to maybe. ppl who understands he likes his space and the way he works. fellow soldiers that just like to get the job done? not sure how long that’ll last bc we lov begrudging friendships in this house.

pls gimme ppl that will annoy the heck out of him. leon and matilda vibes. he’s a baby sitter lbr.

he ain’t no ho but he still got needs. one night stands onli. feel like he used 2 fuck ppl in the gang but has made a rule not to anymore cos he cbf for messiness. (we’ll see)

someone that is able to get him to him maybe? bring out the fire in him, make him lose his shit bc when he does he loses his control. and he likes being in control of himself. hence no drinking 2 much.

enemies - anyone who’s a bit psycho and trigger happy, he ain’t gonna get on with u. i feel like he’s sent on jobs to keep them lot in check.

someone that can actually get him to talk? they could have nice simple random conversations about absolutely nothing but will take a certain character (iono what that is yet pls i’m useless)

if you’ve made it this far then i’m sorry. it’s obvious i just have no idea whAT IM DOIN AND IONO Y U CARRY ON WIT THIS MESS OF A RAMBLE.

if u wanna plot like this post and i’ll message u :D or if u wanna message me first that’s grand too >:))))

#valdez.intro #tw death #tw addiction #tw drugs #tw murder #tw violence #tw abuse #tw imsobadatintroskillme #this took me far 2 long #imm #a stop editing it n0w

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