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aemiron-main · 1 year

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HELLO AGAIN!! Just wanna say that I love your analyses as always. THE NATURE DOCUMENTARY ONE, LITERALLY UNHINGED IT'S SO GOOD. YOU'RE SO GOOD!!!

You talking about how Mike used to be open about his emotions, but isn't anymore with the milk analogy???? JAIL!! PUTING YOU IN JAIL AGAIN- IT'S SO GOOD.

Anyways I've been reading on repressing and suppressing emotions?? Ok so I'm not claiming to be a professional or anything, I'm just reciting what I've read about!! IT'S JUST REALLY INTERESTING TO TALK ABOUT in the case of Mike.

Ok before I go on a tangent, I found something interesting-

CRYING!! MIKE WHEELER??-

Anyways suppressing is when you avoid talking or expressing an unwanted or uncomfortable emotion and in order to do that, some may do something to distract themselves, in the case of Mike (Him playing video games in the basement.) BUT there's also controlling your intake of food!! which is what Mike might also be doing. He's looking for some control.

Suppressing emotions happens when you don't know what to do with said emotions (aka his feelings for Will, he's having thoughts about Will so he ignores/avoids them by playing video games.) Basically suppression is something that you actively do whilst repressing is more unconscious. Mike might be a mix of these 2.

I think by the end of S4 or something he might be leaning more towards repression.

I wanna talk more about how his family life causes this, cause it's soo interesting. Mike doesn't know how to healthily express his emotions, because his parents are emotionally stunt. They've never talk about their emotions, so it's just uncomfortable for him to do so because he didn't grow up in an environment where doing so was considered normal. I think this effect the entirety of the Wheeler kids. They just don't know what to do with feelings, so they shove it down aka suppressing them. Just shoving them down so they don't have to deal with them.

Wonder why Mike feels more dull in S4? Going back to watch clips from S1-2 felt like experiencing smth different. Mike felt more explosive you could say, he was moody and angry, but at least it was an emotion. S3-4 felt like watching the colors drain out of him, because that's when he learns to shove them down, cause they're bad. Feelings like anger, frustration, sadness anything!! He shoves them down. Cause 1) he's shown that he can't express these feelings without repercussions, his parents punishment for acting out instead of understanding him. 2) He's been shown that these emotions are not important.

He thinks he shouldn't have these emotions, because he's not allowed to, he hasn't suffered enough to feel these.

Feels like I'm just repeating things, but he's SUCH an interesting character to talk about!!! Anyways just came here to say that you're probably my fav (personally) Mike analyst. You do it so well!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAA HELLO OMG!!! IM SO SLOW AT REPLYING TO ASKS IM SORRY BUT FIRST OF ALL THANK YOU SO SO MUCH YOU'RE SO SWEET AND IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE MY ANALYSIS!! I LOVE UR ART AND I LOVE UR MIKE'S LACK OF SELF VALUE ANALYSIS (i have a rb of it in my drafts i promise i havent forgotten abt it)!! AFBJHJBH THANK YOU THE MILK POST WENT FROM BEING A SHITPOST ABT HIM DRINKING MILK WHEN HES STRESSED INTO AN ACTUAL ANALYSIS BC I WAS LIKE 'wait... wAIT... a pattern is appearing..." AND YES OMG HELL YEAH IM SO EXCITED TO SEE YOUR THOUGHTS!! Okay so YES!!!!! THAT ABSOLUTELY SOUNDS LIKE MIKE AGHH!!! YOURE SO RIGHT!! Mike in the basement, but also mike controlling his food intake!! I personally think that when it comes to mike & food as a source of control, its more of a subconscious thing rather than actively being aware of it, like he lacks appetite and isnt eating for a variety of reasons which i need to make a full post on one day, and so he then associates not eating w that feeling of being in control and so then it’s just another reason on his list of various reasons as to why he ends up avoiding food! Esp since i think mike’s food issues are also tied to his repression of his emotions and queerness and guilt and again how he’s subconsciously seeking control through food, but also how he associates ‘real food’ in s1 with family and karen’s cooking but as that relationship w his family deteriorates, esp bc of his guilt abt his queerness and bc of his depression/mental health in general, his relationship w food also deteriorates. Mike’s life has had so many moments of a loss of control, esp w the supernatural stuff, but I feel like a.) the continuation of his relationship with el and feeling like he has very little control over that relationship bc theres so many expectations for him and b.) feeling like he’s lost will are two core losses of control that are really affecting him pre-s4, esp feeling like he’s failed and lost will and out of control of his life bc his sense of stability (will’s presence in his life) is gone, and so he’s seeking a sense of control through food while simultaneously punishing himself/neglecting himself by not eating. And that is SUCH a great point both about a.) mike’s feelings for will and focusing on videogames and b.) the distinction between repression vs suppression. I def think mike has a mix of those two, and is leaning towards repression in s4, yes!!!!

“I wanna talk more about how his family life causes this, cause it's soo interesting. Mike doesn't know how to healthily express his emotions, because his parents are emotionally stunt. They've never talk about their emotions, so it's just uncomfortable for him to do so because he didn't grow up in an environment where doing so was considered normal. I think this effect the entirety of the Wheeler kids. They just don't know what to do with feelings, so they shove it down aka suppressing them. Just shoving them down so they don't have to deal with them.” And that’s another fantastic point/great way of framing it, as if he feels “more dull,” in s4, because he DOES, because he’s tired and struggling and pushing down his emotions and feels like he’s always going to be demeaned or ignored if he expresses them!!! Mike’s parents are SO emotionally unavailable and not only do they fail to encourage Mike to show his emotions, but they also punish him for it too! In s2, when he’s upset and expressing himself about having to give away his toys, Karen reprimands him for his upset & reminds him off things that he did like graffitiing the bathroom stall- which is odd because he’s already BEEN punished for those things, he’s already lost his Atari, and the toys aren’t actually tied to his “bad behaviour,” but rather, Karen wants the toys to be given away & is using mike’s “bad behaviour” as an excuse. It also struck me that Ted, who’s usually pretty silent, chimed in to give Mike shit with his “strike 20 you’re on the bench, son” comment but we never see Ted chime in to defend Mike in any of the dinner scenes, only to reprimand him. We don’t even see Ted and Mike have a nice normal conversation at the dinner table- or EVER! When was the last time we saw Mike and Ted just. Talk. At all. An actual conversation, not even a deep serious one but just anything that isn’t just “Ted making snarky comments at Mike”? Hell, Mike doesn’t even respond to Ted’s snarky comments at the s2 dinner table, nor does he respond to them in the kitchen scene in s4 ep1. He’s responding to Karen in both scenes but not Ted. We literally haven’t seen an actual conversation between Mike and Ted at all. The CLOSEST we’ve gotten to that is s1 ep1 where Ted is fixing the tv & Mike tries to ask about staying longer for dnd but Ted shuts him down and tells him to talk to/listen to Karen. This is REALLY interesting to me because that’s the only time we really see any sort of two way dialogue between Mike and Ted where they’re even just. Responding directly to eachother at all. And it’s because from that scene, Mike has learned that he can’t go to Ted and that Ted’s just going to redirect him to Karen & not listen to Mike, so then in Mike’s mind, why should he even bother with Ted? Mike shoves down his feelings SO MUCH, we see him get shut down so often and eventually he just starts shutting himself down & repressing his own emotions before anyone else can try and shut him down. “S3-4 felt like watching the colors drain out of him” THIS IS SO SO TRUE AND ACCURATE AND AGAIN IS A FANTASTIC WAY OF FRAMING/PHRASING IT!!! THATS EXACTLY WHAT IT IS!! And i completely agree, at least he was EXPRESSING himself, at least it was emotions, but then in s3-s4, he REALLY starts shoving them down, because exactly like you said, he’s been shown that not only are his emotions deemed unimportant, but they’re also actively punished.

He thinks he shouldn't have these emotions, because he's not allowed to, he hasn't suffered enough to feel these.

EXACTLY!!!!! He feels like he isn’t suffering enough because of how he compares himself to others & invalidates his own experiences and emotions & how other people, including El (with the s4 bedroom fight scene and her invalidating him when he talks about being bullied) have invalidated and shut him down too. And that’s part of what frustrates me about some of the discussion surrounding Mike’s mental health in the fandom too- they fall into that same “Mike hasn’t suffered enough to have mental health issues,” trap, and compare Mike to other characters and use that comparison to invalidate and willfully ignore his struggles and it’s NOT frustrating because that approach completely misses the POINT of how Mike’s character aligns with people who feel like they are suffering enough & who are invisible & who invalidate themselves because of how they’ve been invalidated by others.

HES SUCH AN INTERESTING CHARACTER AND I LOVE THE THOUGHTS YOUVE MENTIONED HERE!! And thank you so, so much omg that makes me so happy because i LOVE analyzing him! YOURE SO SWEET THANK YOU SM AAAAAAAAAAA!!! 💗💕

#st asks #stranger things #souppiemousse #mike wheeler analysis #mike's mental health #st analysis #wheeler family #ted wheeler ref #Karen wheeler ref #TW ed #mike’s food issues

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lumpsbumpsandwhumps · 2 years

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for the "describe your whumpee" post, id like to offer ghost <3 (he/it) (19)

he is super whiny + entitled for sure, "im hungryyy..." "these straps are so uncomfortable..." "stop it! asshole."

only until he's taken down a few pegs, ofc

entitled bc he's an only child and his parents were well off as sheep farmers

naturally very thin and short

also super sensitive (to words and pain)

his soft spot is sheep for sure, he has a favorite one named "ian" (would be a shame if he was fed mutton (be even more of a shame if the sheep it came from was his))

Aw, he's like Jonas, but brattier, which is quite lovely for Malik because now he won't feel as much guilt doing all the things he'd like to do to his lover (that would probably kill him) on someone who would be just as satisfying.

Ghost is more than welcome to complain to Malik, after all what kind of country boy would he be if he didn't show good southern hospitality? He's hungry? Here's the stomach contents of some other poor bastard. Straps too tight? Let's remove some flesh from those bony limbs so the leather won't cut into them so deeply. He wants Malik to stop one thing? Sure, he can move on to something else that is much, much worse.

Going all in on someone with a very low pain tolerance isn't ideal as they're more likely to faint, or even die, from shock before anything fun can get getting. So unfortunately for Ghost, he's in for the long haul of slow, methodical torture sessions, to draw out medium levels of agony for extended periods of time. Once he starts getting bratty, Malik gives him a taste of what real torture can be like, reminding him that he's getting off easy. For now.

Going so slow can get pretty boring though, so there's no warning for when Malik is done with this game and launches into his final session. Poor Ghost would have built up a bit higher tolerance than he previously had, meaning he's going to be awake and aware much longer than normal. If he makes it through the filming, he can have a lovely reward of haggis, imported straight from his farm (:

Video Price: $17K

#ask #anon #ask game #red room game

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bye-bye-firefly · 1 year

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About the Last of Us thing-should I look up a play through of it to watch before reading your crossover thingy?? Cause like I’m only vaguely aware of plot and the only piece of media related to it I’ve consumed is this this video by inquisitormaster where she turned it into it a pokemon go thingy that I watched like 3 years ago. The game seems so cool though and I’ve wanted to watch a playthrough of it for awhile but I had been going to wait until I finished watching playthroughs for some other games but then I read your posts about your crossover like 2 minutes ago and started debating on if I should start watching it now. Anyway, what’re you most excited about it?

(If I sound delirious in this, it’s because it’s past midnight and I am)

oh my GOSH so basically i have it set POST tlou2 because well im deranged and i like both the games and i want shuichi and kaede to be going to santa barbara and. HONESTLY? .

Okay well i was about to type out spoilers LOL okay i love tlou. i can only recommend forever that people either play or watch tlou AND tlou2 because people will hate on that game just to hate it. i swear. i love both games. so like totally absolutely i would recommend penny snapcube's playthrough of the first game and then from there you should be good! like we dont reference anything that happens in tlou2 other than The Fireflies Are Now In Santa Barbara. no mention of abby or ellie or what have you. but still. its highly important to understand how the Stages of Infection work. i love tlou infected i adore them forever. can you tell ive been playing this game obsessively ever since it came out when i was a wee boy

i am really excited to write soooo much of these relationships because that is truly what tlou was about to me. but. then again. every single piece of media i interact with and write has to do with Love and Relationships and Loving People. its always about love with me. i am very excited to write the dynamic that is so severely underrated that is kaede, kokichi, and miu. those three are a RIOT. not one person says "stop" everyone is pressing the gas and doing more than the other

#fae's asks #i hope you also like the playlist because i fucking love that playlist #im listening to it rn before i go to bed <3

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a-jynx · 3 years

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Dream; - usually really aware when you guys plan date nights! Even with his busy schedule, he’s on top of remembering important nights - he doesn’t want you to feel neglected or forgotten :’) - however he can get forgetful when he’s playing with Sap and George, or streaming, but when he does oh, he feels devastated and will definitely become clingy

[Short imagine]

12:30 PM - he’d forgotten. You sighed, closing your phone and slouching into the couch, listening to your boyfriend’s laughs echo throughout your shared home; Sapnap’s screams filtering through as well.

Frowning, you turned on the living room TV and turned on Netflix, deciding that a movie would take away from the small sting in your gut. You knew he hadn’t meant to get sucked up into his work, and this one time of a few that he’d forgotten, but that doesn’t stop the sadness twisting in your gut. Turning on the Twilight series, and obviously horrible but entertaining favorite [team Jacob anyone?] before grabbing your warmed-up Panda Express and engrossing yourself into the world of vampires and werewolves.

2:45 AM

Dream groaned as his screen flashed a dull red, congratulating George and Sap about their win from their Minecraft Manhunt; 2 hunters. Glancing at the time, he rubbed at his face and clicked out of everything, ending his video. Stretching he leaned back and glanced towards the bed, expecting you to already be cuddled up and passed out, but the comfy queen was empty…

Furrowing his brows, he scooted his chair back and left his room, moving downstairs as Sap came out of his room, still grinning.

“Hey man, nice hunt, though I’m surprised you made it go for so long,” Sap groaned as he joined Dream on the stairwell making the dirty blonde frown.

“What’re you talking about? Manhunts always go for a couple of hours?” Dream snorted as Sap frowned, only to sigh and pat his friend on the shoulder.

“Dude… You had date night tonight..?”

Dream’s eyes widened as he rushed further downstairs, turning into the living room and frowning at the sight. You curled up into the corner, an empty container on the coffee table and the credits rolling of The Twilight Saga; new moon. Squatting down next to you, he gently cradled your cheek as you hummed in sleep, cracking open your eyes as you broke into a smile, your eyes settling on your frowning boyfriend.

“Hiya handsome,”

“Hi, baby… Fuck, I’m so sorry I forgot,” Dream leaned into you, pressing soft kisses to your cheeks, nose, chin, lips - anywhere his lips could reach as you chuckled, raising your hand and threading it through his hair. “I just got so lost in the video, but that’s no excuse I promise I’ll make it up to you-”

“Dream, babe it’s okay, this is like… The first time you’ve forgotten, just don’t make it a full-time thing, yeah?” You laughed as Dream dove into you, circling your waist with his arms and picking you up, causing you to yell out.

“Clay!”

“We’re going to bed, and I’m not letting you go until I see fit,” Dream stated, carrying you upstairs as you glanced to Sapnap, waving to him before you and your still disappointed boyfriend disappeared into his room.

Sapnap - he’s definitely more forgetful than Dream, but he tries okay? - a lot more clingy when he realizes what he did, definitely becomes more of a hopeless romantic

[Short imagine]

“Shouldn’t you be gone by now?” You turned away from the fridge, seeing Dream entering from the living room as you shrugged, closing it with a sigh.

“Yeah, we should’ve left half an hour ago but he joined Karl’s stream… Again.” You mumbled the last bit as Dream frowned, leaning against the cabinets as you messed with the strings of your boyfriends’ basketball shorts.

“Aren’t you gonna say something?”

“Honestly? Probably not, I mean we’ve already had a talk about if he forgets-” you paused when a sudden crash came from upstairs, causing you and Dream to turn towards the stairs as Sap came barreling down. You blinked as he stood in front of you, wrapping his arms around your waist and tucking his face into the crook of your neck, making you giggle.

“Hi, bubs,”

“I’msorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimhorribleicantbelieveiforgotimsosososorry-” Sap mumbled into your skin, as you reached up, ruffling his hair as he pressed kisses along your neck, going along your shoulder before trailing back up and pressing his lips against your chin before settling back between your shoulder and throat.

Dream snickered from next to you guys as he dug into the fridge, digging out some pizza from lunch as Sap looked up and glared at his friend. “So, what reminded you?” The dirty blonde hummed, getting ready for his dinner as your brunette boyfriend scoffed.

“I obviously reminded myself! I’m not that-” he paused as a chime came from his shorts’ pocket causing him to cringe. Furrowing your brows, you reached in and tugged out his phone, breaking into a smile as you realized it was an alarm.

‘ Date Night Idiot!’ had been going off for an hour, you assuming Sap had snoozed it, not realizing why his alarm was going off.

“Dumb.. Okay! I had to set a few reminders,” Sap mumbled, pressing more kisses to your warmed skin, trying to hide away from his embarrassment. You closed his phone and slipped it back into his pocket before grabbing his hand and tugging him upstairs with you, his head hung low as you went into his room, besides a small light from his screen. You jumped onto his bed, opening your arms as Sap shot you a small grin and dove into you, cuddling into your chest and pressing more kisses to your free skin, his hand sneaking up your shirt just resting against your skin, rubbing his thumb across your navel while smiling into your kiss.

“I know I’m extremely forgetful when it comes to romantic stuff, but please always know that I love you even if I have a shitty way of showing it,” he mumbled against your lips, moving his hand from your stomach to your face, holding your cheek as you stared at each other. Sure, you could be upset at him, you could ignore him, maybe argue… But why miss out on warm cuddles and make-up kisses?

Karl - he’s the one who usually makes the dates up! He always tries to make sure his streams and recording don’t overlap the days you agreed on - but who says you always remember?

[Short imagine]

It was the long-awaited shock & facecam stream! You had promised to follow in your friend’s - George, Sap, and Dream’s - steps in a shock stream and even threw in a facecam if your followers had gotten one of your posts to hit one million likes, and your fans did not disappoint! Your tweet promising this stream had hit two million likes, 10,506 retweets, and continuous replies. So, here you were, setting up for your stream when Karl walked in…

“Sweetness..? What’re you, uh, what’re you doing..?” He nervously giggled as he stood beside you, his hands nervously tugging on your hoodie as you turned towards him, frowning.

“I’m getting ready for the shock stream? Remember? I planned this a couple months ago and we agreed on today?” You blinked at your boyfriend. You both had talked about this stream since you arranged the day - why is it suddenly a problem?

“Oh, well, remember we agreed that today - tonight - was going to be date night? We were gonna watch some of the new season of Survivor?” Karl hummed as you blinked, turning fully towards him with your eyes wide as you glanced towards your starting soon screen. You could feel your heart plummet into your stomach - you had done the one thing you and Karl agreed to never do, yet here you were..

“Baby, oh my god, I’m- holy shit, I’m so sorry,” you murmured, rubbing your face as Karl shot you a small grin, scooting closer and musing your hair as you leaned into his touch, cradling your own face with dread coursing through you.

“Bubs, it’s okay, I know you’ve been planning this, and I should’ve thought ahead-”

“No!” You burst, gripping his wrist and pressing light kisses to it before groaning against his skin. “No, it’s not okay, we always try and plan for us to have date nights between our busy schedules and it’s such an asshole thing for me to not double-check that it was-” Karl leaned down, quieting you with pressing his lips to yours. You melted into it as he turned your chair to face him more, causing him to grip your hands tightly in his before pulling away.

“It’s okay because I want you to go through with this stream! You’ve been excited about it and I know the guys are wanting to join, besides-” he paused, pressing butterfly-like kisses to your hands as you grinned at your boyfriend.

“Date night can be any night for us,”

“So, what I’m hearing is you love me more than Survivor?” You giggled as Karl furrowed his brows and scoffed, dropping your hands dramatically before pulling his gaming chair next to yours as you began to set up your facecams’ final touches.

“I love you, like a lot, but know your boundaries, Bubs,” Karl scoffed as you rolled your eyes, leaning over and pressing a quick kiss to his cheek and clicking through your screens before popping up on your stream with a ‘Hey guys!’

~~~

helloooo~ long time no writing and im so sorry about that - life has gotten a little crazy and I sort of lost motivation to write a lot again. i hope these headcanons and my future idea for some can hold you over until I have some sort of - lack of better word - motivation :'D

until tomorrow, i hope you have a beautiful day ~ J

#dream smp x reader #dream smp hc #dreamwastaken x reader #sapnap x reader #karl jacobs x reader #dsmp x reader #dreamwastaken hcs #sapnap hcs #karl jacobs hcs #mcyt hc #mcyt x reader

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letsjam-art · 2 years

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between you and me

a drawing i did of alt and johnny while i was thinking about how their connection changed (semi ironically) down the line, and how i very much like that they ended up meeting the same fate... i have many words about how i feel about alt and alt and johnnys relationship so i actually tried to type them out in a mostly organized fashion and there are alot of them so... in the read more.

and as always click for some more qual! (i was silly and didnt plan this out well at all you would not believe how small i had to draw for the alt and johnny in the background...)

alt alt alt.... oh the way this game handles her character makes my brain go into tv static mode. for how important she is in regards to kicking off shit happening in the ttrpg and then being rather directly related to vs misfortune in the video game... the fact that we only get to meet ‘her’ like what... 3 times max... or just 2 times depending on the ending path you chose... and even then what she gets to say in said scant meetings (read: not alot at all)... it makes me go insane. as does how the game tended to frame everything about her physically extant or not in the most boring uninteresting way possible.

but to start off, and this is a problem with the game at large, but it becomes most egregious with alt, is how self contradictory the game is with itself, and with its namesake canon. as in, cdprs policy of ‘the ttrpg and game are canon at the same time’ which raises actually some pretty interesting entertaining questions... that the game has absolutely no desire to actually delve into... like at all... to its detriment i think. like not even mentioning weird timeline stuff, how the game implies never fade away was written before alt passed, instead of for her, but then the game still seems to be in the camp of no it was written for her and it doesnt really... do anything with this and im sure you could handwave it with oh his memories are scrambled but like... the fact that they rely on this excuse so much makes me a bit irked...ok then delve into why they are scrambled and how, by who? was it on purpose? how does johnny feel about this? why do the people we meet in the game that were eye witnesses say nothing? or never confirm or deny anything? if the ttrpg canon is canon why is what we see in direct conflict with it? like lets dive into it! if both things are true at the same time then it raises some pretty cool questions about events and the motivations and feelings of the ppl who experienced said events and what they did to process it in post! but the game has 0 interest in doing so... it tends to lay things on a table that are actually pretty interesting! but then do nothing to quantify them at all (ie show more memories with alt, or get to talk to her more than twice)

for example... in the ttrpg it was more of a complete mess of events that lead to alt dying, with toshiro having much more of a physical hand in alt getting yanked out and while johnny had a hand in explosion-ing his way in there at the worst time to give toshiro that opportunity it was... less direct than the game makes it out to be which i think makes how johnny deals with alts death much more difficult than a more straight ‘yeah he 100% killed her’ only being partly guilty even if by accident for the end of a version of someone you loved? how does one deal with that?, and raises more interesting questions then of ‘well then why are his memories like that??? placing him as the one who did the deed??’ which running theme here, the game never delves into. and then you get to inconsistencies like alt confirming the incorrect memories by placing the blame on johnny... so... like whats the truth...and even if alt wasnt aware of the events that transpired at the time... there are others who were... like rogue who is still extant and walking and talking... but nope! we get nothing from her about this either.

and not only events wise but like on a more character base wise deal, johnny and alts relationship between the 2 media is... rather different in flavor to say the least, and while i do prefer the toxic nature of what we see in 2077 immensely compared to the pretty generic ‘soulmates’ thing in the ttrpg (which i do believe you can do the soulmates thing with an absolutely toxic awful relationship) the lack of meshing between the 2 or the confusion that arises from only being shown just ONE snippet of alt and johnny together leads to (when taking only the game into account cause it should be its own thing and if it has to rely on out of universe shit to make sense thats... not good in my book at all) one coming to the opinion that it makes ZERO sense why alt or johnny would do any of that for eachother at all... ever.... so then alt coming running to johnny after 60 years in internet hell and johnny raiding a megacorp twice for alt related motives is either the boring: things were just shitty all the time like we saw... or what seems to be where the game WANTS to go: the relationship wasnt as all nasty as we saw. and then comes the quantifying issue... we only saw them fucking... that is it.. alt n johnny fuck eachother, she gets mad... says a few things with her whole c00ch out, she gets kidnapped, and then she dies... and thats it for her while she was extant! bye! and i do not believe for a second the physical nature of their relationship was the only thing there... and if thats all the writers could think of... thats just boring... (and small tangent here but v straight up has IN UNIVERSE dialogue stating this exact sentiment ‘im beginning to wonder why you went to rescue her at all’ ie it makes 0 sense why you would do that... and the fact a character in universe echoes my out universe confusion and then the game does NOTHING to resolve it... makes me go insane)

and the lack of content for alt and then her relationship for johnny is so non existent to the point i could not even tell you WHY those 2 liked eachother at all... on either end (johnny and alts) and if its just hot sex... again... boring. so then stuff starts to get mildly more interesting when you wonder about things the game didnt ask, didnt answer, or didnt say. did they share worldviews? was she on board with his anti corp beliefs? if she was, why did she then work for ITS and make something that she knew could be used for insidious stuff like soulkiller (ok so she was curious and disgusted by soulkillers potential... SHOW US SMTHN ABOUT THAT PLEASE)? how does/did she feel about handing soulkiller over to arasaka? was she friends with the rest of the band? with the atlantis crew? how did johnny and her even meet? if this relationship was more than backstage sex, what were the other parts like? how did these 2 connect on a level enough for johnny to go raid arasaka twice? what was her presence in the netrunning scene in the 2010s really like? did she know bartmoss and spider well if so what was that like? what about her own personal beliefs? why does she do what she does? how? when did she start? and on and on and on. and im not bothered by the sex scenes so much as im bothered by the fact they could have BOTH the chaarcter moments and the sex... and that big surprise, when you do both character beats AND the hot sex, both are made more meaningful as a result. and normally thered be enough scraps for me to make shit up in a more educated guess kinda way but when it comes to these 2... lmao i literally know negative knowledge about her that isnt just: she was pretty, she did computer things, she died, and had sex with johnny lots. (and this is not me hating her i think shes an incredibly (potentially) interesting character by virtue of everything the game didnt do. cause they clearly care about eachother even as ghosts even after 60 years... but theres 0 anything to back that notion up so the player is just left majorly confused once you start asking even the most basic questions. (funny in game line relating to this: the moment where an unromanced v will pull out of their ass that judy is like alt despite the fact that when johnny listed everything he didnt like about judy, he listed all of his major character flaws... like v honey where tf do you get that from... we dont know ANYTHING about alt at all...’cause she cares?’ did alt care v?? did she? how do you know!?!?!? WHERE DID YOU GET THIS INFO ID LIKE TO KNOW)

and then comes how the game handles her as a digital ghost... and this is smthn in the background overarching questions the game asks and doesnt answer for good reason (and to be clear i wouldnt want a game to give any sort of definitive answer on musing philosophical questions like these they are mostly there just to get you to think while npcs are the ones that should have clear sides they take in order to see ideas play out in various ways). but alt is much more firmly in the ‘souls/ppl are not continuous’ camp. and id be fine with this cause itd be fun to have her and johnny clash about this around v given vs potential fate (esp since johnny is clearly in the ‘souls/ppl are continuous camp’) but again we dont really get anything to quantify this. WHY does she feel this way? WHAT made her of this line of thought? why does she repeat alt is dead so much? is she hiding in this? if so, why? what was existence really like for her surviving alone for 60 years in internet hell as even if one doesnt consider it a human existence, existing as smthn that still has the thinking patterns of a human? and its kinda funny how much she flip flops on considering johnny ‘just data’ and considering him johnny (which if im not mistaken the relic 2.0 device codex entry strongly suggests the device basically makes a construct an ai at that point, not mentioning how he uses vs brain to process info and function so her terming him as data seems a bit off... esp when at least in the polish version johnny says that constructs in mikoshi ARE just data with no awareness... the game gives no clear answer to this whole deal really...im digressing), but then she doesnt flip flop when it comes to the other constructs in mikoshi... and we dont delve into why much or get to challenge her much on this or anything really.

but then at large the questions of humanity and what makes the self the self and continuity of consciousness and whatnot... the game tends to focus more on the uninteresting ‘what’ instead of the more apt ‘memory’/’how you are treated’ aspect of it. alt has a line in the scene files about no longer being able to remember how to properly describe certain feelings to v saying ‘that johnny could explain this better since he remembers what these emotions feel like’... existing in cyberspace alone for so long, esp when we know its not a fun time, detached would cause anyone to forget such things, forget themselves to a point even, could this then be considered the same person?. and youd think with the overall setup of ‘v is being overwritten and will cease to exist in any capacity except physical’ the framing of the story would lean more towards ‘memory’ instead of ‘what’. vik will say v will be overwritten until theres nothing left, seeming to imply that with no memory of who you are you are no longer whatever ‘self’ you used to be. johnny has heaps of memory discrepancies and the game never seems to put 2 n 2 together that this should cause far more existential terror, horror, dread than ‘are you a copy’ or ‘you are just data’, if your memories were changed, forgotten, or worse, changed by an outside force beyond your control and without your knowledge or consent? where does that leave how you consider your ‘self’? are you the same? how could you be sure? how do you continue on if its true? (bonus points that the dream on quest exists and asks this very questions but then doesnt ever think to have v and johnny explore this despite connecting their 2 situations to it... johnny never really acknowledges his memories couldve been changed or that theres discrepancies at all.. theres no horror of ‘ill never know what is real and whats fake’ etc.)

relating this to alt again, the questions of if she is the same shouldve been related to this aspect of ‘memory’ and ‘how you are treated’, if alt forgot what it was like to be human, feel human, be treated as such, what would it be like to have that suddenly be given back to you 60 years later? 60 years alone surviving tooth and nail in an alien place with ur ‘brain’ still processing stuff like a human, would make anyone cast out anything unnecessary or anything that left room for error. to have to exist in such an extreme place, after traumatic/extreme events outside of your control alone? this would change anyone, no one is the same after something so paradigm changing. and this is something alt and johnny have in common, johnny went to war as someone with a completely different name, was traumatized to hell and back and in order to move forward had to become a completely different person... with extreme physical changes to boot (arm gone). alt lost her body and had to survive internet hell alone and even if she has the same face and name... she is wholly different. which i think them finally meeting up after all this time, and having johnny treat her like old times, old times which shes probably forgotten almost entirely out of necessity, to be treated like a person, a human? by someone who ended up sharing your same fate pretty much? interesting questions i think. esp relating back to how johnny and alt feel about their situations: alt had 60 years alone to have to deal with her new existential normal thrust upon her, johnny just woke up... it makes me wonder if she gets a little mad at johnny for going with it so easily lol. but also alt does show some shades of anger at v when v likens her to some faustian entity to have to cut deals with at vs expense... if ai are feared and treated like monsters by netwatch and beyond... how would this make someone view themselves? would they start believing this after long? if theres anything about her thats fun to explore i think its about how terrifyingly/frustratingly 'in between' she is post 'death' (in the sense of being human but also kind of not, being an ai, but one that still has thinking patterns of a human brain, she doesnt have enough of either world she has her foot in to be considered alien enough to the other, and i like to think her own insistence shes not alt and alt how truly died and how she seems to get irked at johnny for believing soulkiller didnt change him is a reflection of her own frustration at her new metaphysical normal imposed on her by actions outside of her control)... johnnys belief that he is human/the same is enough for him, but clearly that isnt enough for alt and itd be fun to see them clash over this and learn why this is the case for her (ive probably already said this once lol oops)

i also think any sort of conclusion to johnny and alts story shouldve been some bittersweet acknowledgement... lamentation that YES they did change, both of them did. he changed once upon a time due to extreme events too (both war and after alt died). johnny mr hanged man over here finally letting something go that yes alt has changed she is not the same, but then again so did he when he went trough hell, so would anyone, and it sucks! especially when the change is so outside our control! we have to pick up whats left and figure out how to move forward and sometimes what enters in is not what comes out, its scary, and unfair and its sad!. and getting to properly say goodbye... wouldve been a great bittersweet moment between these 2 ghosts, wanting alt to just be free from what was done to her. and maybe for johnny to do the same. just SOMETHING where he acknowledges how hard it mustve been for her to be alone all those years. have him make the choice to close the book on his mourning for alt. and even if for just a moment alt got to experience being treated as not some ai on the run, as a being/person again... her voicing gratitude or that it was nice even if temporary... idk smthn on this aspect the game has like... only one r two lines on this train of thinking that you can get if you treat alt nicely but thats 2 lines... quantity... please... anything....

the last thing i think wouldve been fun with alt is getting to have more dialogue with her as an ai, as in maybe getting to challenge her more on her beliefs, challenging her more than just one line on how she treats the constructs in miikoshi (coughs, she treats them about as well as arasaka... as things... commodity and i wanna know why more! what DOES she really plan to do! is the ghost city really something she built? was it for a corp like the game says it was or was it for victims of soulkiller? what does she do as an ai and why!!!! how does she feel about soulkiller and her part in its murders now vs before?) it wouldve been fun to maybe even have some quests we did for her since who knows the last time shes had contact with someone in realspace, its not like she can easily navigate anywhere without fear of netwatch or other ais or whatever. quantity, quantify yadda yadda you know the deal.

so yeah i quite enjoy the potential her character had, the potential her and johnnys relationship had.... and besides the framing issues... theres just SO little of her to make any sort of good educated guess... and its a little more than frustrating. we arent even told things so much as implied things and those implications arent even properly quantified in any sort of understandable way if at all leaving me and i know others confused as hell. 2077 was a prefect opportunity to take a pretty one sided ttrpg character who was majorly tied into events of that media and expand upon her... but sadly cdpr did the exact opposite and boy does it make me incensed... but it also inspires me to draw pictures so here we are... thanks for reading. ive probably forgotten more than a few points i wanted to make but alas thats how it goes.

and im aware me saying that if to get a whole experience out of a media i have to go read or consume out of universe media is bad while also referencing script files from a game that contain stuff that isnt in there proper kinda clashes but kinda proves my point lol i had to dig in some files for scraps...and also kinda points to me that they MAYBE had this idea to go in those direction but... whatever happened in this 50 car pileup of a games production happened and here we are.

#cyberpunk 2077 #johnny silverhand #cp2077 #cp 2077 #2077 #alt cunningham #cyberpunk alt #altiera cunningham #cyberpunk johnny #anyways the irony i was trying to mention was how johnny was all huff puff 'i dont care about you alt' when they were together last #but then come 60 years r so later hes the one who hasnt moved onand clearly does care for her and always did #but its only after death and time that he ever gets to try and make amends or follow up #while alt well i cant say too much cause again we dont have barely anything but she stuck around for some reason enough #but then in the future shes moved on and more past it all had to probably surviving in internet hell #shes no longer the one reaching out kinda deal #and i do always like how its kind of karmaic that johnny got soulkilled like her trapped in the same place as she was #theres uhhh alot of words in that read more and if you get through all of them kudos #i also love talking about this and would love to hear others opinions #and even though like i say i dont like having to get outside material in order to get the full story much if anyone has ANYTHING more canon #content wise in regards to alt outside of 2020 rulebook and never fade away i would love to know about it and do some reading #this game literally makes me insane with how self contradictory it is... insane...#and its not just alt its practically everyone else and the world at large too lol #also drawing ppl from full profile view is... hard...#og

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asthmark · 4 years

Text

❝ 10 things i know about you ❞ l.jn

synopsis → there are ten important things you learn about lee jeno during your time in quarantine.

request → “if you're still accepting requests, can u make a domestic roommate!jeno? 🥺🥺 thank you and have a nice dayyy”

word count → 7.1k (bruhhh)

sharing an apartment with lee jeno isn’t ideal.

it’s not that he’s a lousy roommate or that you disliked him in any way; you just didn’t know him. you had first met through a mutual friend. they knew jeno was looking for someone to split rent with and that you happened to need a place to stay. they promised you he would give you privacy and assured jeno you were excellent roommate material. with that, arrangements were made and soon enough you moved in together. of course, it was a bit awkward at first but you two eventually got used to each other’s presence. although you were never in the same room for too long and oftentimes went days without speaking, you coexisted.

for a long time, you only knew a couple things about your roommate. for example, you were aware of his strong love for cats, especially his pet calico, seol. you also knew he kept the freezer stocked with pizza rolls that he would use as energy when he stayed up all night playing video games.

what you didn’t know, however, was that you would be spending the next couple months locked in your apartment with him. on top of that, you would begin to learn more things about him—his life, his personality, his feelings.

there are ten important things you learn about lee jeno during your time in quarantine.

1. he’s a heavy sleeper.

at 10:28 in the morning you find yourself seated at the dining table in the kitchen, spooning froot loops into your mouth. as you stuff your face, you scroll through your phone for entertainment. you decide to open instagram first but you quickly find that to be a mistake. as soon as you open the app a picture of lucas and who you thought was his ex-girlfriend greets you. if that was bad, the caption hits you like a ton of bricks.

@lucas_xx444: should have never left you

in only five words, lucas has completely erased the months you spent dating. it meant nothing to him. sure, things hadn’t ended things the best way but going right back to his toxic ex and even admitting to missing her—now that was a new low. was this his way of getting back at you? his way of making you hurt just like he had throughout your entire relationship? the thought alone leaves you feeling sick.

you decide you’ve already had enough social media for one morning so you decide to check your messages instead. your friends usually left a couple of them overnight. to your surprise, you find that your main group chat has accumulated 241 messages.

[10:48 am] you: good morning i see u guys have been vry chatty

[10:49 am] yeji: ur finally awake!

[10:50 am] yuna: we thought u died lol

[10:50 am] lia: YUNA

[10:50 am] lia: NO

[10:51 am] ryujin: the timing for that joke could not be worse

[10:52 am] yuna: humor is my coping mechanism leave me alone

[10:52 am] you: ??? what happened

[10:53 am] chaeryeong: we left msgs for a reason dummy read them!!

[10:53 am] you: umm there’s over 200 and im not abouta read all that

[10:54 am] yuna: well then lemme break it down

[10:54 am] yuna: the world is ending :)

[10:55 am] you: welp it was about time

[10:55 am] lia: why r u guys like this

[10:56 am] yeji: there’s been a covid-19 outbreak and it’s spreading like wildfire so the government issued a stay at home order :/

[10:57 am] you: omg WHAT

[10:57 am] ryujin: ikr it’s crazy we literally can’t go anywhere

[10:57 am] chaeryeong: and we can’t get boba today either ;( i was so looking forward to that

[10:58 am] ryujin: let’s pls take a moment of silence for all the current and future boba dates that will have to be cancelled

[10:59 am] yuna: no way am i gonna let some wannabe flu make me go boba-less i’m still going out >:(

[10:59 am] lia: ...ur joking right

[10:59 am] yeji: what color casket do u want yuna?

before the groupchat can distract you any further, you place your phone down on the table. you sit back in your chair and let the newly revealed information sink in.

you were stuck inside.

you sigh before standing to clean your dishes. as you’re scrubbing away at your bowl, you feel something brush against your leg. you smile, not even having to look down to know it was seol. the cat would often wander into your room or sleep next to you when you watched tv on the couch. in fact, you were pretty sure you spent more time with seol than his owner.

you gaze at jeno’s room. as always, the door is shut. you wonder if you should let him know what was happening. you two usually kept your distance but you figured that the circumstance you found yourself in was an exception. you quickly dry your hand and shuffle towards his room.

you knock once, quite softly. you assume he’s asleep so you try again, this time a little harder. still, no avail. the third time you put even more force into it. by this time, seol has found his way beside you and claws at the door.

“jeno?” you knock a fourth time. “jeno! lee jeno!”

after more shouting accompanied by incessant meowing, you hear some muffled movement. moments later the door knob twists open and there stands your roommate with disheveled hair and a robe that had obviously just been thrown on his body. seol has taken the open crack in the door as an invitation inside the bedroom.

jeno blinks a couple times as he watches the feline get himself comfortable on his bed. he turns back to you, looking slightly disoriented. you’re not sure if he’s half asleep or your sudden presence has thrown him for a loop. his voice comes out raspy when he asks, “was he, um, bothering you or something?”

you shake your head, vigorously. “that’s not why i came. it’s just that my friends told me that there’s been some kind of virus outbreak and we’re supposed to stay home. so, i thought i’d let you know.”

his face softens. “oh, cool.” suddenly, the look changes. “not the virus thing! that’s totally not cool. i meant, it’s cool that you let me know and stuff. you just saved me a huge freak out so, uh, thank you.”

you smile and nod. “no problem.”

jeno’s eyes linger as you retreat back into your room down the hall. the sound of his door shutting is heard only once you’re out of his eyesight.

2. he can cook better than you.

most of the time, you would go out to eat dinner with your friends in the evenings or at least stop by a drive thru. obviously, this was no longer possible in the midst of a pandemic. you found that to be incredibly frustrating as you sat on your bed, stomach empty. no matter how badly you wished to fix it, your laziness had gotten the best of you. apart from that, you already knew how unlucky you were when it came to cooking—the memory of burning noodles at lia’s house one night had been permanently seared into your brain.

you almost believe your mind is playing tricks on you when you catch a whiff of pasta in the air. for a moment you think it’s your next door neighbor, taeyong, cooking again. you knew he was quite the chef. but, the smell is getting stronger by the second and you decide it must be in your apartment.

you wander into the kitchen, only to find jeno standing over the stove. he’s stirring red sauce in a pot when he notices you watching him.

“oh, hey,” he greets with a polite wave.

you can only stare at the rest of the kitchen—pots, pans, and ingredients all over the place—in utter awe.

he chuckles, awkwardly. “yeah, sorry about the mess. i’ve been told i’m a decent cook but i can never seem to get the tidiness down.”

“no, it’s not that. this just all seems so... professional.” you sniff the air once more. “smells amazing, too.”

he smiles, sheepishly. “thanks. are you a fan of spaghetti?”

you nod.

“good. i wanted to make something you’d like.”

“you really didn’t have to,” you say, leaning against the fridge. “i mean, i’ve never done anything for you.”

he uncovers a pot to check on the pasta. you watch as hot steam rises out of it. “what about this morning?”

you can’t help but laugh. “that most certainly does not count. you’re making an entire meal. that takes a lot of effort.”

he waves a hand, dismissively. “i used to cook a lot with my old roommate, doyoung. the guy was an asian gordon ramsey, i swear. so, yeah, this is nothing too crazy. and i really do enjoy it.”

“well, i’m still gonna repay you.” you fold your arms.

he looks away from his dish to raise a brow. “is that so?”

you nod in confirmation. “definitely.”

“tell you what, if you wash the mountain of dishes that are gonna be left over, we’ll be even.”

you stare at the sink that’s already overflowing with dirty kitchen tools. that wasn’t even half of it. “uh, sure, sounds good.”

he laughs at hearing the uncertainty in your voice. “that’s the spirit.”

3. he’s allergic to cats.

the familiar sound of soft purring is what pulls you attention away from the movie playing on your laptop. already knowing exactly who it is, you launch yourself off your bed to allow your furry guest inside.

“hey seol. what’ve you been up to?”

the calico meows, almost as if he were responding to your question. you close your door and go back to your original position. you notice seol sitting directly in front of your bed, looking up at you with wide eyes.

“come on up.” you pat your sheets, invitingly.

he obeys and stretches before laying down beside you.

“have you ever watched ‘avengers’?” you ask, eyes going back to the explosive fight scene on the screen.

this time, seol doesn’t even bother humoring you with a meow. he stays silent with his head tucked into his paws.

you scratch his head and his tail wiggles. “i’ve gotta stop asking you questions.”

both you and seol’s heads snap towards the door when you hear a knock.

“come in!” you call out.

jeno swings open the door. his eyes briefly scan the room before landing on the furball on your bed. the unmistakable look of adoration shines in his eyes when he sees how lovingly you caress him.

“seol! what are you doing in here? bothering y/n?” the cat jumps off your bed and towards his owner standing in your doorway. jeno scoops him into his arms and faces you. “i’m so sorry. he saw me running a bath for him and bolted.”

“it’s all good. he’s a great movie buddy. besides, i could always use the company.”

jeno curiously glances at your computer screen. “is that ‘avengers’?”

“yep. i’ve seen it like a dozen times.”

“same here.“ he pauses. “hey, if you ever need a movie buddy—like you know, one that talks—just let me know.”

your face lights up. “i’m gonna hold you to that.”

”i hope so. well, if you’ll excuse me, i’ve gotta give this guy a bath.”

seol yowls as if he understands the meaning behind the words and attempts to escape jeno’s grip.

“here we go again,” he mumbles under his breath.

you snicker at the sight. “looks like you could use some help.”

“oh, no. it’s fine. he can just be a little bratty someti—seol!”

in the blink of an eye, the feline has successfully hopped out of his arms and made a run for it.

jeno gives you an exasperated look before rushing off to catch his runway pet. you find yourself caught up in the excitement so you follow him, the two of you now in pursuit of the calico. you’re sure the image of you both chasing the fluffy animal around the apartment looks like something straight out of a comedy. even you and jeno can’t contain your laughter when he finally catches seol only for him to slip out of his hold a second later. this exact situation repeats itself a couple times before you finally get lucky.

“i got him!” you screech. “jeno! oh my god! what do i do?”

“bathroom, bathroom, bathroom!” he chants in response.

you head in that direction with jeno trailing behind you, ready to catch seol if he somehow manages to get out of your death grip. you bend over the bathtub, slowly lowering the cat into the water. it’s clear he doesn’t have a problem with making a fuss as he wails and flails his limbs around.

after a while, he finally calms down enough that you can lather him in shampoo. jeno insists on scrubbing him, arguing that you had already done way too much. you sit back on your heels, observing the way the seol leans into his delicate touches.

“looks like he likes it now.”

“he likes to make a big deal but he ends up enjoying it every—“ jeno cuts himself off with a sneeze.

“tissue?” you offer.

he shakes his head. “that’s okay, thanks. i’m used to it. i’m just surprised my allergies haven’t acted up ‘til now.”

“allergies?” you echo.

“yeah, i’m allergic to—“ another sneeze. “cats.”

your eyes widen. “really? and you still have seol?”

“i could never get rid of him. he’s too good of a boy. isn’t—“ sneeze. “that right?” he tickles seol under his chin.

“wow. you must really love him.”

“so much.”

“he’s lucky to have you.”

“what about you? you get both of us. doesn’t that make you the luckiest?”

you snort. “i guess it does.”

4. he makes a good shopping buddy.

“i have officially cooked everything we have.”

“i can order some takeout, if you want?”

he juts his lower lip out and gives you puppy eyes. “but i like to cook for you.”

you laugh at his expression. “oh god, you look like that one pouty emoji people use when they try to be cute.”

he sits up. “did it work?”

you nod and pinch his cheek.

he yelps. “ah, stop! you’re acting like my grandma!” he manages to get out of your grasp. he rubs his face, soothing the spots you had squeezed. “seriously, though, we really do need to stock up on food.”

“i’ve already been looking into it.” you show him the screen of your phone. “says here you can still go shopping as long as you wear a mask and try to stay six feet away from other shoppers.”

he cringes. “i don’t know if i like the idea of being so close to so many people.”

“i can go by myself, then,” you suggest with a shrug.

he doesn’t hesitate to deny you. “no way are you going alone.” his possessive tone has you staring at him curiously so he adds, “you know, in case you can’t reach something on the top shelf.”

the teasing comment paired with his innocent smile makes you gasp in disbelief. “lee jeno! that’s low! and to think i almost thought you were worried about me.”

“who said i wasn’t?” he smiles at you again before standing up. “i’m going to find us some masks and then we can head out.”

once you arrive at your local grocery store, you find it to be packed. everyone seems to be in a hurry, grabbing things left and right.

“wow, it’s already gotten crazy,” jeno mumbles, stopping to stare at the flood of people that rush by.

you don’t hesitate to scold him. “well, don’t just stand there! we gotta get our stuff before there’s nothing left!”

without another word you slip into the frenzy of people. jeno struggles to stay behind you. after almost losing sight of you a couple times, he walks a little faster to catch up and places his arm firmly around your waist once he does. you look up at him, your mask covering your slightly agape mouth.

being the gentleman he is, he apologizes. “sorry but i don’t want us to get separated.”

you can only nod and mumble, “good idea.”

jeno pushes the shopping cart with his right hand and holds your figure with his left. once in a while, you’ll break apart from each other to grab an item you need but once it’s in the cart, he’ll make sure you end up in the same position. after an hour or so, you’ve grabbed enough and you decide it’s time to pay.

despite the mask she has on, you can tell the middle-aged woman behind the cash register has a big smile on her face once she catches sight of you and your roommate.

“well, just look at you two.” she sighs. “how cute.”

“oh.” you glance at her then jeno then her again. “oh, no. it’s not like that.”

you attempt to move yourself away from jeno only to find his grip to be so incredibly strong that you almost begin to think he’s trying to hold you in place. once you finally detach yourself from him, you begin loading your groceries onto the counter for the employee to scan. she does so, but not before giving you a displeased look.

“oh really? he holds you like that because you aren’t together?”

jeno assists her in placing the scanned items in bags. “i didn’t want to lose her.”

she pauses scanning a can of tuna to stare him down. “darling, that sounds like a line from a cheesy hallmark rom-com.”

you can’t help but chuckle. “what he means is that there’s a lot of people here and we didn’t want to get separated.”

jeno adds, “desperate times calls for desperate measures.”

the woman adjusts her glasses. “well, you do certainly seem desperate to have her close to you.”

jeno doesn’t say a word as he continues bagging but his smile reaches his eyes.

5. he works out.

why did the pandemic have to hit in the middle of summer?

you often asked yourself this, complaining about how inconvenient it was. especially on the days that made your apartment feel like it was on fire. the days that required a thin tank top and shorts. even then, you found yourself to be drenched in sweat.

you sprawled your arms and legs farther on the sofa, the leather material proving to be very uncomfortable. it was either that or your bed with the warm cotton sheets that stuck to your body. just thinking about it brings you discomfort. the only relief you could think of was a cold shower. you would have already taken one if jeno hadn’t been hogging the one bathroom in the apartment.

“jeno!” you yell.

silence; other than the sound of the water running.

“lee jeno!”

the water stops, temporarily for him to shout back an answer. “what?!”

you wipe at the sweat that has accumulated on the bridge of your nose. “hurry up! i’m melting!”

the water starts back up again and you groan. hoping to distract yourself, you pull out your phone. the group chat with your friends is surprisingly silent so you go to instagram for some entertainment. this time, your ex-boyfriend’s post isn’t the first thing you see. it takes you some scrolling but you do end up seeing another one of his pictures.

it’s simply two intertwined hands with a black and white filter. you identify the one on the left as his and although you aren’t as familiar with the one on the right, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out who it belongs to. contrary to the last, this photo has no cheesy words for a caption, just a red heart.

but, your stomach doesn’t drop. you don’t feel hurt, either. obviously, you still don’t enjoy seeing him just because of all the awful memories that came with it but other than that, you feel unaffected by the image.

in fact, you feel so confident in yourself that you block him.

you’re surprised you hadn’t done it sooner. you had known you didn’t need him in your life any longer so why keep in contact? you feel like a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders when you press the red button that would keep him and his girlfriend out of your life. you knew with your whole heart that you didn’t need to see either of them.

before, a bit if you had felt the need to keep an eye on him. to see how he was handling the breakup and torture yourself with the fact that he didn’t seem to care. now, you could say you truly didn’t either. you didn’t need him or his stupid pictures. you had other, better things.

your friends.

your cat (yes, you considered seol to be yours).

your roommate.

you had to admit, jeno was the best thing on that list. quarantine had brought you and him significantly closer and you were over the moon about it. he was so wonderful that you kicked yourself for having lived with him for so long without ever really getting to know him. but it was easy to say you two were making up for lost time seeing as you spent every waking moment together. the record long showers jeno took being an exception, of course.

the moment the door to the bathroom opens, you rush into your room and quickly grab an oversized t-shirt and loose pajama pants to change into after your shower. you nearly drop them when you’re met with jeno’s soaking figure in the hallway.

his hair is damp and you can clearly see how long it had become. his skin looks healthy and moisturized, lotion among other skin care products had probably been applied. what really has you in a shock is the fact that the towel barely hangs below his waist. the droplets of water that fall from his hair and down his neck trail down his chest and toned torso towards the only area he has bothered to cover up. his bulky arms are also slightly wet, his veins popping noticeably. he shakes his head in an attempt to rid his hair of any water. then he runs his fingers through it, his muscles flexing ever so slightly as he does so.

“dude!” you exclaim, without a second thought. “you’re ripped!”

he smiles, his round cheeks growing at the unexpected praise. the way he could have such a rugged body but soft-featured face puzzled you to no extent. “thank you. i lift sometimes.”

“sometimes?” you repeat. “don’t be so humble! you’re basically hercules!”

he clicks his tongue. “ah, c’mon. i’m just an athletic person.”

you keep admiring his physique. “clearly.”

“oh god,” he groans, obviously flustered. “you’re looking at me like you’re gonna eat me or something.”

you hold yourself back from making a less than appropriate innuendo. “no comment.”

his eyebrows shoot up in disbelief. “quarantine is really making you go crazy.”

you point a finger at him. “you try being stuck inside with your hot roommate!”

“trust me, y/n, i know all about hot roommates.”

you tilt your head, acting purposefully oblivious. “are you talking about doyoung?”

“what? no i—“ he sighs. “you know what, just take your shower.”

6. you can’t say no to him.

jeno ruffles his black locks with his hand and frowns.

you give him a disappointed look. “knock it off, you’re gonna get dandruff in your soup.”

he ignores your comment. “i look like a hobo.”

you pause, spoon halfway to your mouth. “this i know.”

“y/n, this is serious!”

“okay, okay. what’s the issue?”

“i already told you! i’m a bum!”

“you? a bum?” you pause to think about it. “i mean, mentally? maybe. but physically? no.”

“my hair, though. it’s so long.” he grabs a strand of it and pulls it to emphasize his point.

you shrug. “if having lots of hair is the standard for being a bum, i think most of the population is.”

“i want to cut it,” he announces.

“you should,” you say, pointing your spoon at him. “wanna know why? because if you mess up, no one will ever know. other than me, of course. but if you pay me enough i’ll let you forget it.”

he smiles at the joke for a moment before he leans forward and his face goes serious. “will you help me?”

“what? no way. i’ll mess up. and it’s only funny if you do it.”

he pouts. “please?”

you stir your soup around. “just watch some youtube videos. after three, you’re automatically a professional.”

“i want you.”

the statement has your neck snapping up from your bowl to him. the smug grin on his face lets you know that he was well aware of the double meaning behind his words. it was clear he was trying to fluster you enough to get a yes.

“you think you’re flirty enough to straight up brainwash me into doing stuff?”

“well, i wanted to say that to you anyway but... kind of?”

you feel a smile creep onto your lips at hearing the genuine tone in his voice. you down your last few spoonfuls of soup and quickly stand up. jeno looks up at you, eyes hopeful.

“finish your dinner. get the scissors. meet me in the bathroom.”

not even ten minutes later, jeno practically dances into the bathroom, a pair of red craft scissors in his hand. he sits on top of the toilet lid, figuring that’d be the easiest way for you to reach him. you walk in moments later.

“i’m pretty sure we’re not supposed to be using these types of scissors for hair,” he mumbles as he hands you the sharp utensil.

you twirl them in your hand. “oh, definitely not. do you want to wait then?”

he shakes his head, his shaggy bangs swaying with the movement.

“alright, let’s get this going then.” you thread your hands through his thick locks to collect some of it in between two of your fingers. you bring the scissors forward and snip the small amount just to test the waters.

you slowly begin to get more comfortable and once you feel like you’re in your element, things begin to speed up. you move and cut faster but with efficiency. you do the spots on the back of his head and work your way forward. when it finally comes time to touch up his bangs, your small bathroom proves to be an inadequate spot to be doing this.

you end up standing balanced inches above jeno’s thighs that he’s pressed together tightly in an attempt to give you more room. you’re constantly readjusting your stance and when he notices, his hands go to your hips. you know he’s just trying to help you stay upright so you do a decent job but you still inhale sharply at the feeling of his hands on you.

not long after, you’re standing next to jeno as he inspects himself in the mirror. his fingers flick his newly shortened bangs around.

“not bad.” he tilts his head in a new angle and nods. “looks super good to me.”

you tuck the scissors into your back pocket with a relieved sigh. “oh thank god. i didn’t want to tell you before we started but i only watched two youtube tutorials on trimming hair.”

he runs a hand through his hair with a chuckle. “now that’s truly worthy of praise. and a tip.”

you raise a brow. “oh yeah? what’s th—“

he cuts you off by pressing a chaste kiss to your forehead. he pulls back and drags his thumb over the skin that has come into contact with his lips. “thanks again.” with that, he leaves you standing in the bathroom, eyes wide and face warm.

7. he has six best friends.

“can i borrow your laptop?” asks jeno, from outside your door, nearly breathless.

you look up from your book. “uh yeah, sure.”

he rushes in your room and takes the item off of your dresser. “do you happen to have zoom on it?”

you shake your head and he groans. without another word, he disappears, running off into the living room. you hear his frustrated sighs as the minutes pass and he attempts to download the application. you finally decide to go check it out once it becomes too much to bear.

“it sounds like you’re in pain over here,” you comment.

he runs a hand through his hair. “i’m supposed to meet with my friends through a zoom call but it’s so complicated.”

you put a hand on your hip. “bet you five bucks i’ll be able to get it in five minutes.”

“are you kidding? i might be technologically challenged but i’m not stupid. i know you can do it fast, just help me out already, would you?”

“alright, grandpa.”

you type and click away at the screen, jeno watching you do so, entranced but equally as lost.

“well, i was wrong,” you say after a couple moments, leaning back in your chair.

“you couldn’t get it?” asks jeno, worriedly.

“no, it’s not that.” you click something on the screen and the app opens. “turns out i could do it in three.”

he rolls his eyes and shoos you out of the chair. he sits down and enters the code and password for the zoom meeting. it takes a minute, but he finally connects. you count six other people in the call. they all immediately cheer at seeing jeno and you hear them excitedly exclaim his name.

“hey guys,” he says, a smile already reaching his eyes. “it’s so good to see your faces.”

they all nod to agree. you get a good look at each one of them and realize they’re all boys. your eyes read over each of their display names.

mark me in ur heart

hyuckie~~~

moomin enthusiast

nananananana

chnele

lil huddy

“nice name, jeno,” ‘moomin enthusiast’ guy comments, snickering slightly. “glad to see you finally came to terms with it.”

‘jenojam’, his name reads. the rest of the group laughs, also teasing him about it. you assume it’s some kind of inside joke.

the self proclaimed ‘lil huddy’ furrows his eyebrows. “wait, did you choose that name yourself?”

jeno simply nods in response.

he glares into the camera. “donghyuck, you told me i had to put this as my name or else it wouldn’t let me connect!”

donghyuck—or ‘hyuckie~~~’, you presume—shrugs. “oops. guess i was wrong.”

you laugh at the humorous exchange. it seems like the sound has drawn some attention to you when ‘nananananana’ speaks up, eyes trained on you.

“um jeno? don’t you want to introduce your guest?”

jeno beams, dragging you closer into the frame. “i’m sure you all know about my roommate. say hi, y/n.”

you do so, waving and smiling politely at the group.

“you know, even though we used to always hang at jeno’s, i don’t think we’ve ever actually seen your face,” ‘chnele’ says, tilting his head.

you agree. “me neither. i’ve mostly just heard you guys.”

the ‘mark me in your heart’ boy sheepishly rubs his neck. “sorry. we tend to be a little loud.”

‘chnele’ lets out a high pitched screech of a laugh. “only a little?”

“i recognize that laugh!” you blurt. “i would hear it all the time!”

”that’s our little dolphin,” coos ‘hyuckie~~~’.

“oh god, stop. i hate that stupid nickname.”

“it’s well deserved.”

“i think you should apologize to y/n for being a nightmare to her eardrums.”

“and ours, for that matter.”

“what about all your little freestyles? i’ve had to sit through hundreds of them and i never got an apology!”

“because they’re not bad! could you do any better?”

“you’re a soundcloud rapper, i think anyone could.”

jeno turns to you as the bickering on screen gets louder and louder. “this is gonna be a long call.”

once the group has moved on from roasting the life out of each other, you’re able to engage in some good-natured conversation. jeno teaches you the names and the other basics about the group. some points that stand out about the group is that mark is the oldest, renjun specializes in contemporary dance, jaemin inhales six cups of coffee on the daily, and chenle is insanely rich.

“what about jeno?” you ask them. “anything i should know about him?”

“he’s allergic to cats but the idiot still adopted—“

“she already knows about that, renjun,” jeno chuckles.

“oh. well. that’s pretty much the only interesting thing about him.”

jisung pipes up. “oh wait! he works out religiously too!”

you and jeno share a look. you burst into laughter and he simply glances away, slightly embarrassed. “oh yeah, i know that all too well.”

“and what about the unhealthy cooking obsession?”

you nod at mark’s question. “that too. he cooks dinner almost every night around here.”

renjun purses his lips. “he already cooks for you? wow. he must really like you.”

“you think?” jaemin asks. “didn’t you read any of the messages in the group chat? he’s practically in love with her. his words, not mi—“

“okay! i think it’s time for us to go! bye guys!” jeno doesn’t even give you a chance to say your own goodbye before he’s clicking the ‘end call’ button in the bottom right corner.

you give him a confused look. “what was that all about?”

“they’re crazy.” he laughs. “well, if you need me i’ll be in my room screaming into my pillow for the next couple hours.” he dashes off leaving you standing alone, trying to comprehend what had happened.

8. he‘s a great listener.

jeno has officially replaced seol as your movie buddy, not that you have a problem with it. you thought it was nice to have someone you could actually converse with but of course, you make sure seol still sits in.

“what i’m saying is that iron man just wants to protect his team.”

“well, if they sign the accords, they basically surrender themselves to the government.”

“and?”

“you don’t see a problem with that? see, captain america knows what he’s doing. he’s literally an avenger—“

“so is iron man!”

“let me finish! so, he’s an avenger, right? he has the best judgment because he’s saved the world countless times. he knows how to operate his team and do the right thing.”

“okay but there’s casualties. and that’s what iron man is trying to fix.”

“how do you save the world and not have casualties?”

“you just—“ your phone rings mid argument and you raise your finger towards jeno. “this isn’t over.” you put the phone to your ear, not bothering to check the caller id. “hello?”

“sweetheart?”

you feel a chill go up your spine. was it him? no, it couldn’t be. you had blocked his number shortly after you did so on all your social media.

“baby, don’t be so shy. i know you’re there.”

you can’t hold back. “please don’t call me that.”

he chuckles, breathlessly. “oh, c’mon. you used to love it. you still do.”

“no, i don’t. actually, i don’t want to hear your stupid pet names or stupid voice or see any of your stupid posts. just go bother your girlfriend and leave me alone.”

you notice jeno perk up beside you out of the corner of your eye. he must have been caught off guard by your irritated tone.

as always, lucas is unaffected by you. “i’m being nice and giving you a second chance. i even called you behind soyeon’s back.”

“is that something i’m supposed to reward you for?” you scoff. “congratulations, you’re now awful, toxic, and a cheater.”

he growls. the sound was familiar. in your relationship, if you heard it you knew he was going to snap at you until he had the satisfaction of making you cry. “i know you miss me so don’t say things you’re going to regret later. because even when you’re back in my arms, i won’t let you forget it.”

the thought of being back with him made you feel icky. but the fact that he sincerely thought you would crawl back to him set your entire body on fire. “are you joking? i was always aware of the fact that you treated me like the dirt you walked on but do you seriously think that lowly of me?”

you’re rendered speechless and apparently, so is he because the other line stays silent.

“i wouldn’t go back to you if you were the last person on earth,” you spit. “you treated me horribly, wong yukhei. i won’t ever forget it. move on. i have.”

you glance at jeno, his expression more serious than you’ve ever seen it. his eyebrows are furrowed and his eyes are trained on your cellphone. the glare he gives the device is so strong you wouldn’t be surprised if even lucas could feel it, wherever he was.

you hang up and block the number, wishing to never talk to him again. you toss your phone onto the sofa with an exasperated sigh. you find jeno’s gaze to still be focused intensely on it.

“if you gave lucas that look, i’m pretty sure he’d cry.”

he breaks his concentration, eyes going to you instead. his entire face softens. “all i’m going to say is he better pray we never cross paths.”

“well, if you happen to, call me up. i wouldn’t mind helping you beat the crap out of him.”

jeno chuckles for a second then lowers his voice to a whisper. “he was really bad to you, huh?”

you nod. “he messed me up. i hate to admit it ‘cause i know i was stupid to stay with him for as long as i did.”

your roommate shakes his head. “don’t say that. it’s not your fault he messed up the best thing that would ever happen to him.”

“i thought i was the problem for so long, jeno. i was so blinded by love. then, i realized there was no way he truly cared for me when he treated me like i had no heart to be broken.”

jeno scoots towards you and rubs soothing circles into your arm. “you have such a big heart. and i can’t tell you how sorry i am that he took advantage of that. i’m sorry that you were stuck with someone so insecure and ignorant. please, don’t think about him anymore.”

you hold in your tears. you refused to cry over someone like lucas. “i know. i try so hard not to.”

jeno holds your head into his chest. his arms are placed securely on your back. “oh, baby.”

when jeno uses this pet name on you, it feels so completely different from lucas. you could tell me meant it. he wasn’t using it to make you stay a little longer, to assure you he loved you. strangely enough, you do not need to be convinced of that. you feel like you have known it for a long time.

9. he likes to be the big spoon.

you’re not sure how he’s done it but you end up falling asleep in jeno’s arms. you assume it had been so long since you had been cradled and rocked so delicately that the foreign yet extremely delightful sensation knocked you right out. even seol is deep in sleep, laying down peacefully at your feet.

you relish in the feeling of jeno pressed right into your back. he fits so perfectly against you that it reminds you of a puzzle piece. to be exact, the moment when you connect the last two pieces and the full picture becomes complete. that was how you felt—complete.

with jeno’s soft breaths tickling the back of your neck and his soft snores filling your ear, you know there’s nowhere else you’d rather be. his arm that is wrapped around you makes sure you can’t escape his embrace. you are positive that even if you had the liberty of doing so, you would stay exactly where you were.

you lean farther back into your pillow, closing your eyes. you let every thought fade away as you try to fall back asleep as soon as possible. you wanted the moment you found yourself in to last as long as possible.

10. he has feelings for you.

jeno mumbles sweet nothings into your ear as he toys with your hair.

it just seemed right to him. like something he was meant to do with you. he had seen these types of things in films and shows before. it was intimate and touching, the scenes were always meant to tug at the audience’s heart strings and show how in love the two characters were. perhaps, even though you lay asleep in his arms, he wants you to finally know.

“honestly, being inside with you all the time is kind of the best. i know the whole virus situation is less than ideal but being able to spend so much time with you... that’s all i could ask for.” he pauses. “isn’t it so crazy how before this we were all weird and awkward around each other? well, i guess we still kind of are. that’s mostly my fault so... sorry. i just don’t know how to act around you sometimes. we’re barely getting close and i’m already this attached to you. as jisung would so kindly say, ‘i’m simping’.” he chuckles to himself. “all jokes aside, i really do like you. ever since you moved in here all cute and nervous, you’ve taken your own little place in my heart, as cheesy as it sounds. and these past few weeks, you just keep on taking up more and more room in there. not that i have a problem with it. i just...” he stops as if he doesn’t know how else to express his feelings. “really, really like you.”

“thanks.”

you feel him jolt then abruptly stop stroking your hair. there’s silence until he asks, “you don’t happen to be a sleep talker, do you?”

you shake your head.

“and did you hear like, a lot of what i said?”

“only the important stuff. like how awkward you are and how much you like me.”

“o-oh.”

“but don’t worry. it’s mutual.”

you feel his relieved breath hit the skin of your neck. “that’s the best thing i’ve heard all day.”

you tilt your head back and stare at him, confused. “what, did you seriously think i wasn’t into you?”

he shrugs. “i was too busy simping, i guess.”

you can’t contain your laughter at the use of the slang. “park jisung would not be proud.”

4K notes · View notes

chickabee · 3 years

Text

SoRRY I JUST WANNA FANGIRL ABOUT THE BLUES REAL QUICK

This ship is my HEART

I love them so much omg. I just wanna talk about them in the mth universe real quick okay? Okay.

I love how SBJ wrote Boomer.

I SINCERELY LOVE THE WAY SHE WROTE HIM.

Oh god. Im going back to my early 2012 days when i was obsessed with fanimations of the Powerpuff girls and i would legit sit around and watch hours of the same animated stuff (im looking at you rrb x ppnkg Katy Perry ET fan music video)

But because we were all pretty young at the time and not really that creatively original, we all sort of just made Boomer some innocent, soft boy in the fanfics who instantly fell for Bubbles and they would just be a couple.

BUT GAH DAMN DID SBJ SUBVERT MY EXPECTATIONS.

Being a kiddo at the time, and assuming that only people around my age were writing ppg fanfics, I was like "TCH, why is everyone on Deviant art obsessing over this More Than Human cRAp. I caN wRiTE a BeTTeR fAnFIc."

But then I read it.

And it was more than grammar/spelling errorless, unlike most fics I read.

the characters had DIMENSION.

I didn't expect to see

Blossom as a dancer

Butch into Blossom (i was a big cry baby over color crack ships, but her fic became the exception.)

Brick being mature and scary

BOOMER AS A GOOFBALL

AND BUBBLES LITERALLY DENYING HIM OF HIS AFFECTION

Talk about a full 180.

And I know, I KNOW THAT DOESN'T SEEM LIKE A BIG DEAL. BUT OMG WHEN I TELL YOU THEIR EARLY INTERACTIONS ARE SO FUCKIN-

AHHHHHHHHH

Its the way Boomer tries to pin her for me.

It's the way he's literally obsessed for me.

It's the Bubbles seeing right through him for me.

IT'S THE "MR. STEAL YO GIRL" ATTITUDE FOR ME.

Boomer has literally worked so MOTHA FUKN hard to get this ONE GIRL'S ATTENTION who , as Brick clearly puts it, "IS THE ENEMY"

And he falls for her over a Mariah Carey song. HE KNEW IF YOU COULD SING LIKE MIMI... BITCH THERE IS NO COMPETITION.

Omg i feel bad for Hailey.

Oh yeah and, he and Hailey... Bruh. This guy gets his ex to agree to play an Avril song with him just so he can serenade BUBBLES.

THAT IS SO

Boomer. Omg that is so Boomer cause it's like his thought process>> "I know we broke up, but your guitar skills are awesome and I really need you blessing.... Yes by your blessings im referring to your guitar playing...Yes this is for another girl"

" ...Yes it's for Bubbles... Please don't hate me."

And just the fact that Bubbles is like, "Hun, I don't care if you're up there singing "I will Always Love you" to me. If the name ain't Will, you can gon' 'head and chill. "

But Boomer is so determined.

Everytime he gets the chance to impress her, he doesn't hesitate. He's sung to her in the rain (sort of). He picked up on joining the school musical just to have the slim opportunity of kissing her. Can you imagine him , up at like 1 a.m on a school night watching a bunch of musicals foR BUBBLES.

And their banter is so cute! Bubbles knows Boomer's game and she likes to play it just enough to keep HERSELF entertained. She is fully aware she's tempering with a ROWDYRUFF BOY. She see's his tricks from a mile away.

So they just go back and forth and back and forth because really, even though Boomer says he doesn't take his shenanigans with Bubbles seriously...

This is the only thing he's had to work for. Like legit, everything else he's got was because of a hand out or advantages.

His musical talent: a handout from HIM

His first girlfriend: The advantages of his good looks

JS Inc: An advantage from being Bricks brother and being a rowdyruff boy

No neck joe: His advantage of playing instruments (and because he was a ruff boy)

Him becoming popular: his advantages of, music, rrb background and good looks BOOM

BUT DON'T NONE OF THAT SHIT IMPRESS BUBBLES ENOUGH TO GIVE HIM THE TIME OF DAY 😭

She doesn't care that he's hot, that he's popular, that he can literally play her anything ahe wants, just how she likes it. She doesn't care that he says "he'll be nice" or "play fair" or whatever, or that he's literally so charming, so smooth, he treats her as if she's the only girl to exist in his world. He's tried to amplify that he cares about her by hurting other people- BUT IT'S IN HER NAME.

No. What Bubbles want is simple...

It's commitment.

If he can't be committed to love her (I mean look at how easily he threw Hailey aside), or be there when she needs him, or simply BE COMMITTED TO BEING A GOOD PERSON.

Then she can not date him.

Because she doesn't just want to date a cute guy, she wants to be in love with someone she trusts...

And at first it seems like Boomer just wants to have her as an accessory to his life, and he DOES. The guy literally expects her to drop her relationship with Will just so they can live out his five minute fantasy.

But slowly he realizes, it's more than that magnificent voice. He likes to see her flustered and he doesn't like seeing her upset because of what people say about her. He doesn't want her to be annoyed by him, or to just brush off his advances.

He starts to really want her.

Like REALLY want her, because whatever they've built, that's the only thing he's had to work for in his life, and he loves her for that. He loves her even more when she implies that he is just as important as his brothers and that it's okay to be just a teenager in love. He loves her and his music, she doesn't ask for more from him. She wants him to be happy, and he wants to just be happy with her.

AHH FUCK I CAN TALK FOREVER ABOUT THESE TWO OKAY??

FOREVER

THEY ARE MY OTP

But dear lord, I've been typing for some time

Anyway, YES. I adore their dynamic. Boomer may be more of a douche than he realizes but he's never had to work for anything. He's never really been challenged. Bubbles is his only challenge EVEN WHEN THEY GET TOGETHER, he begins questioning the longevity of what they have because he's reminded that he's not the first and Bubbles has a heart of her own. No matter what he does, because of who she is (not just to him, but in general) he cannot manipulate that. He can not force Bubbles to love him if she falls out of love with him. And that's so world shattering for him because the girl is literally his WORLD. Like no other person could replace her because Bubbles is literally all of who he is. He feels like, if he loses her, what is he? What's his purpose? This is the only thing he's ever built.

Which is really, incredibly sad because he shouldn't think of their relationship like that, but he's so deeply in love with her, for him there really is no other. You could try to hand him "the girl of his dreams" and he'd just... Sort of laugh and turn right to Bubbles because everyone knows, THAT'S the girl of his dreams. It's the only girl he'd want to be with.

A lot of people probably won't believe me if I said I'm also a big boomercup shipper, because their dynamic just works so well.

Okay, i am done FANGIRLING. Thanks for reading my long ass post.

#ppg #mth by sbj #sbj more than human #sbj mth #ppg blues #boomubbles #ppg x rrb #ppg boomer #bubbles utonium #bubbles ppg

158 notes · View notes

eurekq · 3 years

Photo

>be me >today i will make a height chart for my da protags and their love interests >okay maybe ill make it an outfit and color reference too >well i dont want it to be too boring to look at >draw this

so here we are with all my sweet little ladies and their lis :]!!! from left to right: cassie cousland, marian hawke and anders, aoife lavellan and cullen, rhiannon tabris and alistair, cecelia hawke and fenris, melly cadash and sera

LOTS of extra stuff under the cut!!!

lovely da protag templates are from marian churchland!

dear sweet cassie, partaker in the forbidden non-romantic alistair marriage that the game never knows how to acknowledge. very much the definition of gaslight gatekeep girlboss. and by that i mean a genuinely bad person in the sense that she tends to toy with peoples feelings. had an extremely public affair with anders during the events of awakening. It takes a good 5 years for her and alistairs marriage to be anything even approaching functional. extremely savvy, ambitious, and charismatic; a great politician and an extremely effective ruler. morrigan is her closest friend in the world (yes i know i never had her in my party. thats because im bad at video games and needed a healer.) and they’re like sisters.

my default hawke. 6′2, buff as shit, slept her way through half of her friends before finally settling with anders. she’s a blood mage and her first use of blood magic was during a particularly nasty fight where she got speared through the stomach. she carves herself up for mana; anders puts her back together. does things in anger and impulse and then regrets them (see: giving isabela to the arishok, never reconciling with carver after leandras death). mean if you dont know her, intensely protective if you do, but takes betrayal extremely poorly. constantly taking action, even if it doesn’t turn out very well; she is physically incapable of being a bystander. her and anders are my fave da couple ever... ask me about my post da2 hcs <3 theyre happy and have a daughter named bethany :] she punched cullen in the mouth at the end of da2 so hard that it left that scar.

literally is there anything like your first dai playthrough being an elf. aoife is... remarkably well realized in my brain for a character who’s life began as my friend chanting “goth elf! goth elf! goth elf!” over my shoulder while i was in character creator. very affable and friendly, but extremely politically adept with a capability for subterfuge that even she isn’t fully comfortable with. huge history buff. solas was like a big brother to her and her faith was extremely important to her so trespasser was crushing. very curious, especially about magic; definitely learned some blood magic from hawke after hearing dorian and solas talk about it. dorian is her closest platonic friend, but cullen is her rock. as in he is literally so normal compared to everything else that happens to her and she loves him for it. also her and hawke are friends and a scenario that lives rent free in my mind is them hanging out while anders and cullen attempt to kill each other in increasingly looney toons-esque ways in the background. she turned out remarkably pretty for an inquisitor... look at her

....and that’s it for my canon timeline. onto the secondary timeline!

DEAR SWEET RHIANNON. 4′8 powerhouse with a sword longer than she is tall. i first played rhiannon with a friend who was very new to rpgs and she picked all of the mean dialogue options because she thought they were funny, which led to me discovering that alistair reacts oddly and kind of hilariously well to being made fun of by a female warden pre-duncan dying. rhiannon is fun in that she literally gives no shits about conflict avoidance; if you start something with her, she’ll see it through. disliked alistair on principle and poked fun at him when they first met, but after the events at ostagar bonded to him extremely strongly. very close to him pretty much at the exclusion of all her other companions. extremely strong willed, laughs loud and smiles wide, no real concept of subterfuge except for when she’s hiding her own pain, generally goes in the path of least resistance if it gets to her goal faster. #1 arl eamon hater. she looks pretty different when i draw her compared to how she looked ingame but this screenshot of her doing the like. dead deer tinder profile pic pose is extremely powerful

cecelia is the truest tragic hawke that i’ve played (rip cecelia. you had the misfortune to exist in the warden alistair timeline). lost carver, lost bethany in the deep roads, lost her mother, believes that fenris has left her. act 2; a real rough ride for cecelia. aside from all the tragedy, she’s tough as nails, direct, and extremely blunt. very cautious in combat, even more so since she lost both carver and bethany. plans upon plans upon plans and prefers to strike unseen and unheard from the shadows. DEEPLY in love with fenris, best friends with isabela and merrill. aware of anders affection for her and keeps some distance for both their sakes; after the chantry explosion she helps him fake his own death on the condition that she never sees him again. when terrible things are not constantly happening she has a very dry wit, part of the reason her and fenris get along so well. too many bad things happen to her for someone with such nice thighs and such a stylish cape. her save file had some weird bugs with companion like.... staring???? in weird directions???

the absolute energy here. she also turned out very pretty in inquisition.

melly is easily my most powerful da oc. not in terms of in-universe power (although sword and board reaver is like. unkillable.) but in the sense that she is a catholic (read: andrastian) mid-40′s widowed mobster milf. she’s very close to cassandra and vivienne and consults them for advice before she goes to her actual advisors. even she was surprised by her relationship with sera; she finds sera’s unique sense of humor very charming and really likes pulling silly pranks with her as a reprieve from her everyday life. when she’s not with sera, she tends to be very pragmatic and logical when making decisions for the inquisition and has a very defined sense of purpose. she takes her role as both as the inquisitor and the herald of andraste very seriously. she’s very warm and soothing to be around during off hours and random inquisition members will often drift towards her for life advice. first draft of her and sera in this drawing had sera wearing this

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blu-joons · 3 years

Text

DATING BTOB A⇴Z HEADCANON ⇴ Im Hyunsik

A ⇴ AFFECTION

Hyunsik loves to use his shoulders to make you feel tiny in his hold, he’s always nice and tight with his hugs, and will use his long chest to be able to stretch around and often press a kiss against your cheek as well.

B ⇴ BEFORE DATING

When a figure stood beside you at the bar, you instantly tensed up, especially so when they asked what you were drinking. Your eyes nervously looked across, drawn to the smile that he wore and the offer of a drink on him as he pulled his wallet in exchange for being able to get your number from you to put in his phone.

C ⇴ CONFESSION

Hyunsik’s confession ended up being a slightly tipsy one during an evening with the boys. Although he professed to being a good drinker, even this was slightly too much for him, letting his mouth run away with him. You thought when he first said it that it was a bit of a joke, but when Eunkwang told you that that really was how he felt about you, you calmed him down by letting you know you’d talk about it more in the morning.

D ⇴ DATES

The two of you did just about anything when it came to your dates, you both were up for trying new things, however simple or crazy they might have been. Hyunsik had two very different sides to him when it came to dates with you, whilst he could do the gentlemanly act and take you to dinner, he could also turn into someone very competitive, especially if your date was sporty, and do whatever it took to make sure that he won. Either side, you adored, and always had a great time whenever you were on a date with him.

E ⇴ EXPERIENCE

He’s very aware of how observant his fans are, having been caught up in a rather strange incident previously, and so he’s very cautious about how he handles your relationship to make sure not too many hints are dropped that the fans might pick up on. He doesn’t want to put you into any harm, and so he makes sure to avoid your social medias and workplace so that no one can trace him back to you. He’s learnt from seeing how other relationships have unfolded to make sure the same doesn’t happen to your own.

F ⇴ FIGHTING

If there’s one thing that frustrates you about Hyungsik, it’s that he often switches off and doesn’t listen to the things that you’re saying to him. You’ll often call out his name to get his attention again, trying to keep yourself calm and not get too frustrated that he didn’t pay attention to what you were saying to him. Arguing with you is not something Hyungsik enjoys either, he’s got a lot of pride, and the last thing he wants is for someone else especially, to see that his relationship isn’t as perfect as he portrays it. He works hard on making your relationship seem good, and so arguments are always kept for at home.

G ⇴ GETTING TO KNOW HIS FAMILY

He’s a gentleman, and incredibly patient too, so Hyungsik will wait only until when you’re ready to introduce you to his family. He’s in no rush, he doesn’t see you going anywhere and so once you’re settled and confident that you can make the best first impression, then he’ll take you across to meet all of them.

H ⇴ HOME

When Hyungsik is working until the late hours, you’ll often invite him over to your place so that he can rest as it’s a lot closer to the studio than his place is. Although neither of you are yet to officially move in, you tend to spend most nights either at your place, or his, depending on how the situation is unfolding.

I ⇴ “I LOVE YOU”

Hyungsik was the first one of the two of you to say those three special words when you went out to dinner one evening. He was determined to make it a romantic occasion, slightly different from most of your other dates. In fact, the whole evening took your breath away, but that was most definitely the icing on top of the cake.

J ⇴ JEALOUSY

He had a tendency to jump to conclusions a little which often let him a little jealous over certain situations. Although he was a confident guy, there was still an element of doubt that often crept in when he saw other people a little too close to you. Pride often got in the way of his jealousy too, Hyungsik couldn’t help but step in and pull you away when he was feeling jealous, only to usually realise that he’d gotten the wrong end of the stick or interrupted a rather important conversation for you.

K ⇴ KIDS

Although the future was something that Hyungsik didn’t worry about too much, he was open minded when it came to talking about it and imagining how things may be for the two of you. He never put a number on how many kids you’d had and didn’t want to pinpoint exactly how he’d be as a father, instead he wanted to look forward to when it happened and picture all sorts of scenarios that might unfold.

L ⇴ LAUGHTER

Hyungsik was confident that he could put a smile on your face in almost any situation, he knew exactly how to make you laugh, using his time in the band to learn how happy people were around him. He’s incredibly positive, which will often leave you smiling, even when you’re thinking the worse, Hyungsik is there to remind you that good things could happen and that there’s no reason to dwell on things. Serious environments are not for him, and so when things feel a little down, he’ll pick it straight back up and make plenty of jokes until everyone’s got smiles back on their faces once again.

M ⇴ MISSING

He’s not someone that will switch off when he misses you, instead Hyungsik will do things that keep you in mind, which can keep him happy too. He’ll often look over old photos and videos, laughing away to himself backstage as he remembered the memories you’d made. For you, he’d often send you gifts or voice notes to make sure that you were thinking of him too and doing so with a smile on your face rather than getting upset over how much you missed him. He could never just forget about you on tour, his only job was to make sure that he remembered, but that he did so with happy memories in mind.

N ⇴ NICKNAMES

You’ll love to tease him, often referring to him as a ‘show off,’ for how confident he was. If you beat him at a game, that would definitely be when you’d use the nickname to rub it in his face that you were the winner.

O ⇴ OBSESSION

He was obsessed with your hold; he loves feeling your arms wrap around him whenever he’s coming from behind or the side to pull you into his chest.

P ⇴ PDA

More than anything else, Hyungsik is aware with his affection, adapting quickly to most situations. If you need to be protected, he’ll do it in a heartbeat, but if you’re more relaxed and just want to hold onto his hand, he’ll extend it out and swing your arms around, always pushing the boundaries and making you laugh.

Q ⇴ QUESTIONS

You’re forever having to ask Hyungsik if he’s really listening to you when he switches out of a conversation. Most of the time he doesn’t realise he’s doing it until an object flies across the room and wakes him back up again.

R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS

Hyungsik is well known for his tattoos, but he’ll have another that no one knows about, except for you. His tattoos get plenty of attention from the fans but hidden at the top of his leg will be another small tattoo, that no one would ever be able to see on stage, dedicated to you. He loves that no one knows about it, and that it’s with him always, without having to answer any questions or explain the meaning behind it.

S ⇴ SEX

You never quite know what to expect from Hyungsik during intimacy, some evenings he can be a complete gentleman, romantic and loving with his touch. Other times, if his confidence is feeling high, he’ll be a little rougher and dominate with you, letting you know that he’s in charge. Either way, he always makes sure to take care of you, and if you’re not happy at any point, he’ll change what he’s doing instantly.

T ⇴ TEXTS

He’ll often text you little surprises, letting you know he’s waiting to pick you up from work, or to unlock the door because he’s bringing food round. He’ll always pop up with a text, waiting to spend time with you.

U ⇴ UNIVERSE

The two of you were very much a team, your relationship was one that many people would watch in awe of how sweet the two of you were. Not only did it do Hyungsik’s pride the world of good, but it made you feel very secure too.

V ⇴ VACATION

Wintertime had always been Hyungsik’s favourite time of year, so with a chill in the air and plenty of snowfall, he loved to go away with you and have fun. He loves the cold, and even though you aren’t the biggest fan of it, seeing how happy it makes Hyungsik will make it at least bearable for you to be out in it.

W ⇴ WHINING

There are definitely times when Hyungsik will whine at you, but you love to pretend that you’re not listening to get back at him for all the times that he doesn’t.

X ⇴ XXXXX

He’s always very powerful with his kisses, Hyungsik isn’t someone that will pepper kisses or be particularly delicate with his touch, instead he’ll be quite bold and linger with many of his kisses. He’s not someone that’s for quick kisses that can often be left without meaning, instead he’ll make sure that each kiss is filled with meaning, and love, and make sure you’re never left wanting more from him.

Y ⇴ YOU

You were the one that kept him grounded, and always made him feel at home.

Z ⇴ ZZZ

He sleeps a tremendous lot, you’ll often find him napping around the house at various points throughout the day, but he can never sleep as well as he does when you’re there for him to lay upon and relax with.

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Masterlist

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