Barty: Evan, you do remember when we agreed we were better off as friends, right?
Evan, naked in Barty's bed: No, I absolutely do not.
Barty, already taking off his clothes: Fuck... Me neither.
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Incorrect Rosekiller Quotes as Gallavich Moments #4
Barty: *coming back from hiding out in Mexico* even learned me some spanish. dilo otra vez y te hago tragar tu verga
Evan: what the fuck does that mean?
Barty: say that again and i'll shove your dick down your throat
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Harry: i grew up with a lesbian mother and a bisexual father, both of which have a wife and husband so I didn’t know straight people existed until I was like 6
Ron: [is confused on who has a wife and who has a husband] Hold up, I’m confused say that again but slow
Luna: wait me too
Pansy: that’s the life every child deserves.
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James *poking Remus*: Remus. Remus. Remus. Remus wake up. Remus. Remus.
Remus:
James: Remus. Remus. MOONY!!
Remus: OH MY GOD, WHAT??
James: Oh good, since you're awake-
Remus: *groans*
James: -your plan didn't work
Remus: What plan?
James: When you told me to throw confetti over Regulus' head to get him to date me
Remus: I specifically said 'Do NOT, under any circumstances, do that James'
James: Exactly! That's basically telling me to do it!
Remus: It didn't work on Lily, how the hell did you think it would work on Regulus
James: I couldn't have known!! They're such different people!!
Remus: And which parts of those "differences" made you think Regulus Black would be more receptive to being thrown confetti at in front of the whole school
James: Crouch and Rosier still laugh hysterically every time they see me..
James: So what do you suggest I do? Make even a grander gesture in front of everyone??
Remus: No! What-
James: Maybe sing him a song??
Remus: I-
James: That I wrote??
Remus: You're INSANE
James: On my guitar??
Remus *checks the watch*: It's 3 AM James go f-
James: In the great hall??
Remus: I don't even care at this point
James: You're a genius. I knew I came to the right person
Remus: That's the stupidest thing I have ever heard and I feel like I should call Regulus to warn him about you. But you seem convinced so. God bless. *slumps back to bed*
James: Do you believe in god Remus?
Remus: *voice muffled by the pillow* I believe in hell. And I'm in it.
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Evan: I think I'm in love with Barty... Any thoughts?
Regulus: And prayers. Your going to need them.
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Barty, like a cat bringing dead mice: I brought you a surprise!
Evan, knowing his bf killed someone again: *sigh* you did it again
also Evan: ... Fine! Let's bury this one in the garden with all the others...
(basically the plot of the best of you, honey, belongs to me)
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Incorrect Rosekiller Quotes as Gallavich Moments #3
Evan: we gotta goooo, we can't be late to the zionist sex-trafficking cabal meeting at the fucking pizza hut
Barty: oh shit, we're getting pizza?? Yeah! I'm starving!
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