#just pain and suffering

[balladoficarus]

hey, fellas, how do we feel about buck and bucky being the modern literally parallels of orpheus and eurydice?????? but in this version of the story, eurydice escapes and comes back to orpheus. how do we feel???? how do we feel????

#HOW DO WE FEEL? #HOW DO I FEEL? #NOTHING!!!!! #EVERYTHING!!!!! #just pain and suffering #buck and bucky are soulmates #you can't convince me otherwise #john egan #john bucky egan #gale cleven #gale buck cleven #bucky #buck #orpheus #eurydice #greek #greek mythology #tragic love story #ULTIMATE tragic love story #but this version isn't that #masters of the air #mota #hbo war

[cmacavoy]

can we not have a moment of Joy

#just pain and suffering #pride lb

[lesboficfanatic]

Jim; ‘well rest up, at least Angor can’t attack us here in plain daylight, in the middle of public school huh?’

Angor rot immediately after Jim says that; 🙃

#Beep beep bitch #Wanna bet? #Angor is low key fucking hilarious #He’s off the walls #shits and giggles #makes sense #he’s having the worse last couple of #idk his entire life? #At this point? #Just pain and suffering #lol sad man I love him <3

[inkskinned]

the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.

sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.

you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.

it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.

but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.

they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.

they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.

barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.

and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.

but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.

they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!

this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.

#this shifts gender so much bc it actually affects everyone #yes it's a gendered phenomenon. i have written a LOT about how different genders experience it. that's for a different post. #writeblr #ps my comments about seeing someone cry -- this is not to shame any person #and on this blog we support workers. #at the same time it's a really hard experience to see someone that looks like you. clearly in agony. and have them forced to keep going. #when you're young it doesn't necessarily look like acting. it looks scary. and that's what this is about - the fact that teens #have likely already been exposed to that definition of things. because the internet exists #and without the context of healthy education. THAT is the image burned into their minds about what it looks like. #it's also just one of those personal nuanced biases - #at 19 i thought it was normal to be in pain. to cry. to not-like-it. that it should be perfunctory. #it was what i had seen. #and it didn't help that my religious upbringing was like . 'yeah that's what you get for premarital. but also for the reference #we do think you should never actually enjoy it lol' #so like the point im making is that ppl get exposed to that stuff without the context of something more tender #and assume .... 'oh. so it's fine i am not enjoying myself'. and i know they do because I DID. #he was my first boyfriend. how was i supposed to know any different #i didn't even have the mental wherewithal to realize im a lesbian . like THAT used to suffering.

[danidoesathing]

📓 Tell us the fanfics!!

There's one thats like. lived in my brain for years now but ive never got around to writing it. It's a fire emblem awakening fic that is almost entirely focused of Laurent and his relationship with his father, who would be Gaius in this version. as you can tell it's specific to my playthrough because no one else gives a shit about Laurent or a muriel/gaius ship but. like. I care. I care a lot

It's focused on Laurent and his memories of his parents during his years wandering the desert. It would just be him thinking back to the few memories he actually has of them, and specifically how he could remember the few things about his dad. Like his sweet tooth and how his dad would occasionally (and reluctantly) share his sweet stash with him, or the nickname he gave him or the fact Laurent knew how to lockpick or slight of hand because it was one of the few skills he was able to pass on to his son before he died.

ive had the idea of Laurent trying to perform one of the magic tricks his dad was good at and just. not remembering how to do it because its been too long. and with all the weight on his shoulders of trying to save the world while being alone in an empty desert and having to grow up so fast because you'd die otherwise or the fact most of his memories with his mother were about her more clinical nature (she loved him, and he knows that, but its hard when thats the image of her that sticks) or the fact he's lost one of the few things his dad passed onto him, that it just kinda. breaks him. the emotional weight is too much and he has a bit of a breakdown.

It's not really a happy one but like. look ever since i saw their support it's been stuck in my brain. and I KNOW the support is the same for every father support Laurent could have but like

it feels so in-character for Gaius. idk how to explain it any more

#ive had this in my brain since i played the game when i was what. 15? #just. Laurent as a character is pretty good esp with the backstory and #contrasting muriel's serious nature with Gaius being more relaxed one and while Laurent might have both initially like #having that seriousness being necessary for survival but having to essentially reject whatever he's inherited from his dad by doing so #and that just. hurts. like losing his dad all over again but he doesn't know how be anything else #just pain and suffering #i have lots of feelings about 1 (one) serious wizard boy #dani speaks #ask #asks

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

finally at that age where i'm thinking i should get a tattoo. not bc i feel strongly about it, just seems like a waste not to. i've got so much skin i'm not using

#feels so selfish like. all this skin what am i saving it for? #open to design suggestions! (please make me regret this offer) #maybe some deep sea horrors. a pretty watercolor of a gulper eel #once saw a person on the subway with various Skeleton Tattoos on all their limbs #i respected their commitment to the theme #but more than that i respected how all the skeletons were engaged in Activities #dancing in a ballgown. juggling its own (and two other???) skulls. swordfighting. being a mermaid skeleton #ANYWAY. the only reason i haven't already gotten tattoos is i just couldn't be bothered #i'm old enough to know i don't have any strong-but-potentially-temporary feelings driving me towards it #aesthetically i prefer decorated to non-decorated surfaces. but i'm not artistic or thrilled with commitment #honestly it feels like sheer laziness. indecisiveness--nay. immaturity!--that i HAVEN'T gotten a tattoo yet #letting all this blank canvas go to waste. tut tut i need to grow up and be an adult and get a tattoo sleeve already. #really i've put off my responsibilities long enough #(in fairness i DID at one time have 18 different piercings) #(but i took most of them out bc they interfere with wearing headphones and/or shoving my face in my pillow during Sleep Time) #(i only kept the nape piercing bc oddly enough it ended up being the most convenient. and the least painful to get now i think about it.) #(neck piercing? no problem. normal pair of earrings? Tribulations And Suffering. i don't make the rules i just poke them with a stick.)

[olasketches]

two sides of the same coin

#itadori yuuji #ryomen sukuna #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #my art #jujutsu kaisen fanart #brainrot incoming (pls don’t mind me) #one thing sukuna and yuuji have in common is that they’re both absolutely miserable #sukuna is utterly selfish and yet it only made him hollow inside and now he’s just killing time waiting for death to come #yuuji is completely selfless and yet it’s only made him suffer and bc of that he’s been constantly trying to check out of life #and I think the funniest but also the most painful thing about these two is that… #despite that they’re vastly opposite they might be the only people that can understand each other the most #imagine them having a heart to heart lol maybe then they would realise some things about themselves

[willowser]

thinking about you laying in bed with bakugou and lightly tracing the messy edges of the scar in the middle of his chest, hardly able to comprehend how deep that wound runs. it had already been there for years by the time you'd met him, but sometimes you see it and are unable to swallow the fact that—at one time—you were alive and he wasn't.

very quietly, you say, "it's crazy to think how easily i could have missed you,"

because it's not every day you meet and fall in love with a man that's died and come back. if fate is destined and soulmates are real, you imagine the two separate paths of your lives traveling parallel, in sync—and his breaking away for one horrible moment, torn from you before you even knew it.

bakugou is half-asleep, you know, but he shifts until his chin is lightly nudging your forehead, and speaks into your hair. "nah," he murmurs, voice thick and slow and slurred. "would'a found you eventually."

and somehow, you can't find it in your heart to doubt him.

#just #imagine meeting a man and loving him and knowing that he'd died and come back #like fully DIED #not almost not kind of but dead done-zo #that's just so insane #how easily you could have never known him #could have never known him the way you do now #waaaahhh #not to diminish his pain and suffering and death and resurrection and trauma and only acknowledge it for a romantic scenario #but you very easily might have never known bakugou katsuki #and that is not lost on you #✿ willow writes #✿ thoughts: bakugou #✿ theme: domestic bakugou

[missmolsa]

Truly the family of all time <3

#nona the ninth #pyrrha dve #camilla hect #the locked tomb #I JUST WANTED TO DRAW PHYRRA HOW DID WE END UP LIKE THIS #they're a matching set <3 #tlt #ntn #I hate drawing backgrounds soooo much #started drawing this. got tired. bon appetit #shoutout to momfucker prime fr. truly the only mf that can get me practising drawing male anatomy #anyway pain and suffering. *hits post*

[iooiu]

playing around with future donnie’s design and all i can say for sure is this:

1) lose an arm gain three

2) dies

#my bribe has been fulfilled good bye forever folks #ignore how i my lineart is nonexistence i dont actually know her #tried playing around with thin lines though and honestly its kinda fun #personally i prefer the thick ones but thats just me #anyway #future donnie at your first #his design was so fun but also a PAIN TO DRAW THOSE STUPID ROBOT ARMS #hashtag suffering #its ok he dies real soon so its fine <3 #ft some conceptualizing scenes from tltc #hopefully #rottmnt #tmnt #donatello #future donnie #future michelangelo #mikey #bad future timeline #i love her actually sm bad future my beloved #kk im done

[redysetdare]

I don't think a lot of people realize that lot of their advice to disabled people often boils down to "Get over it." they are trying to be helpful but their idea of helpful is "Just do the thing" because that's what they do. for them they just do things. It comes naturally to just do it.

They don't know how to bridge the gap between you and the task. For them the bridge is already pre-built and stable. For disabled people the bridge is run down, not well kept, it feels unsteady and is hard to get across without being slow and cautious - hell for some people there is no bridge and we need to build it ourselves but we don't have the bridge building tools and no one gives them to us.

"Just cross the bridge." They say before walking over their pre-built bridge. They never gave you the tools to build a bridge to cross.

#text #I hope this makes sense #disabled #neurodivergent #adhd #actually adhd #actuallyadhd #idk how to tag this post really i dont post a lot in disabled spaces... #by disability i mean all disabilities btw #i suffer from ADHD and chronic pain ad many other things #and all of them cause me problems that make it hard to 'just do it' #so hearing 'advice' that is just 'do the thing you're struggle to do' really gets on my nerves #especially when the people giving that 'advice' throw a hissy fit when i say that its unhelpful

[lulla-bee]

three years of youth in a minute

#what a week for gays #all these pain and suffering #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jjk season 2 #jjk s2 #jjk gif #jjk edit #jjkedit #gojo satoru #geto suguru #kenjaku #satosugu #lulla-bee #lulla-bee edits #*breaks down uncontrollably* #shibuya arc #shibuya incident #GET SEALED GET SLICED #just realized how crazy it is that the first gif shows their usual life as jujutsu socerer students goofing around and taking missions #the middle gif shows how they work together in their mission with the star plasma vessel #and the last one is the aftermath of riko's arc and how they spiral down and etc #and that memory from before satoru killed suguru in 0 #im so crazy

[novelconcepts]

There’s a line from American Gods I keep coming back to in relation to Yellowjackets, an observation made early on by Shadow in prison: “The kind of behavior that works in a specialized environment, such as prison, can fail to work and in fact become harmful when used outside such an environment.” I keep rotating it in my head in thinking about the six survivors, the roles they occupy in the wilderness, and the way the show depicts them as adults in society.

Because in the wilderness, as in prison, they’re trapped—they’re suffering, they’re traumatized, they’re terrified—but they’re also able to construct very specific boxes to live in. And, in a way, that might make it easier. Cut away the fat, narrow the story down to its base arc. You are no longer the complex young woman who weighs a moral compass before acting. You no longer have the luxury of asking questions. You are a survivor. You have only to get to the next day.

Shauna: the scribe. Lottie: the prophet. Van: the acolyte. Taissa: the skeptic. Misty: the knight. Natalie: the queen. Neat, orderly, the bricks of a new kind of society. And it works in the woods; we know this because these six survive. (Add Travis: the hunter, while you’re at it, because he does make it to adulthood).

But then they’re rescued. And it’s not just lost purpose and PTSD they’re dealing with now, but a loss of that intrinsic identity each built in the woods. How do you go home again? How do you rejoin a so-called civilized world, where all the violence is restricted to a soccer field, to an argument, to your own nightmares?

How does the scribe, the one who wrote it all out in black and white to make sense of the horrors, cope with a world that would actively reject her story? She locks that story away. But she can’t stop turning it over in her head. She can’t forget the details. They’re waiting around every corner. In the husband beside her in bed. In the child she can’t connect with across the table. In the best friend whose parents draw her in, make her the object of their grief, the friend who lives on in every corner of their hometown. She can’t forget, so she tries so hard to write a different kind of story instead, to fool everyone into seeing the soft maternal mask and not the butcher beneath, and she winds up with blood on her hands just the same.

How does the prophet come back from the religion a desperate group made of her, a group that took her tortured visions, her slipping mental health, and built a hungry need around the very things whittling her down? She builds over the bones. She creates a place out of all that well-intended damage, and she tells herself she’s helping, she’s saving them, she has to save them, because the world is greedy and needs a leader, needs a martyr, needs someone to stand up tall and reassure everyone at the end of the day that they know what’s best. The world, any world, needs someone who will take those blows so the innocent don’t have to. She’s haunted by everyone she didn’t save, by the godhood assigned to her out of misplaced damage, and when the darkness comes knocking again, there is nothing else to do but repeat old rhymes until there is blood on her hands just the same.

How does the acolyte return to a world that cares nothing for the faith of the desperate, the faith that did nothing to save most of her friends, that indeed pushed her to destroy? She runs from it. She dives into things that are safe to believe in, things that rescue lonely girls from rough home lives, things that show a young queer kid there’s still sunshine out there somewhere. She delves into fiction, makes a home inside old stories to which she already knows the endings, coaxes herself away from the belief that damned her and into a cinemascope safety net where the real stuff never has to get in. She teaches herself surface-level interests, she avoids anything she might believe in too deeply, and still she’s dragged back to the place where blood winds up on her hands just the same.

How does the skeptic make peace with the things she knows happened, the things that she did even without meaning to, without realizing? She buries them. She leans hard into a refusal to believe those skeletons could ever crawl back out of the graves she stuffed them into, because belief is in some ways the opposite of control. She doesn’t talk to her wife. She doesn’t talk to anyone. It’s not about what’s underneath the surface, because that’s just a mess, so instead she actively discounts the girl she became in the woods. She makes something new, something rational and orderly, someone who can’t fail. She polishes the picture to a shine, and she stands up straight, the model achievement. She goes about her original plan like it was always going to be that way, and she winds up with blood on her hands just the same.

How does the knight exist in a world with no one to serve, no one to protect, no reason propelling the devastating choices she had grown comfortable making? She rechannels it. She convinces herself she’s the smartest person in the room, the most capable, the most observant. She convinces herself other people’s mysteries are hers to solve, that she is helping in every single action she takes. She makes a career out of assisting the most fragile, the most helpless souls she can find, and she makes a hobby out of patrolling for crimes to solve, and when a chance comes to strap her armor back on and ride into battle, she rejoices in the return to normalcy. She craves that station as someone needed, someone to rely upon in the darkest of hours, and she winds up with blood on her hands because, in a way, she never left the wilderness at all.

How does the queen keep going without a queendom, without a pack, without people to lead past the horrors of tomorrow? She doesn’t. She simply does not know how. She scrounges for something, anything, that will make her feel connected to the world the way that team did. She moves in and out of a world that rejects trauma, punishes the traumatized, heckles the grieving as a spectacle. She finds comfort in the cohesive ritual of rehabilitation, this place where she gets so close to finding herself again, only to stumble when she opens her eyes and sees she’s alone. All those months feeding and guiding and gripping fast to the fight of making it to another day, and she no longer knows how to rest. How to let go without falling. She no longer wears a crown, and she never wanted it in the first place, so how on earth does she survive a world that doesn’t understand the guilt and shame of being made the centerpiece of a specialized environment you can never explain to anyone else? How, how, how do you survive without winding up with blood on your hands just the same?

All six of these girls found, for better or worse, a place in the woods. All six of them found, for better or worse, a reason to get up the next day. For each other. And then they go home, and even if they all stayed close, stayed friends, it’d still be like stepping out of chains for the first time in years. Where do you go? How do you make small choices when every decision for months was life or death? How do you keep the part of yourself stitched so innately into your survival in a world that would scream to see it? How do you do away with the survivor and still keep going?

They brought it back with them. Of course they did. It was the only way.

#yellowjackets #yellowjackets spoilers #yj meta #long post #shauna shipman #lottie matthews #taissa turner #van palmer #misty quigley #natalie scatorccio #the question not being how do you survive the wilderness. the question being how do you come BACK. #the way each of them tries so hard to keep moving forward #unable to untangle the girl in the woods from the adult suffering in polite society #how the world doesn’t want to hear about the pain or the night terrors or the sleepwalking or the addiction #the world wants the bright colors and the flash-bang headlines #the world doesn’t want who they are. who they had to be. it wants pretty perfect tragedy #that specialized environment lives on in each one of them every day #but it’s not a place anyone else can ever go #how do you feed that for so long and then just…stop? #constantly thinking about nat saying we didn’t make it out. none of us. #because no. no they didn’t. the girls died the minute that rescue chance did. what came back was risen from those ashes

[youngchronicpain]

Hey, you! Try that mobility aid you've been thinking about. If it helps you, then you need it. Easy as that! Most people start using mobility aids on their own, without a doctor recommendation. And that's perfectly normal and okay! If you're worried about using it correctly, there are many guides to get you started. I know it can be scary. But mobility aids can open up your world in so many ways. If it helps, then you need it!

#this is for the people who are scared to try mobility aids because they can “get by” without one #but just because you can suffer through a day without one doesn't mean that it wouldn't help you!! #mobility aids #chronic pain #chronic illness #disability #spoonie

[pharawee]

Do you still not understand?

#pit babe #pit babe the series #garfield pantach #s vorarit #pitbabeedit #thai bl #thai drama #bl drama #bl series #my edits. #i don't think i will ever recover from this #i think this scene destroyed me #he raised him like a dog #loyal and unwavering #and he's too cruel to even see the value in that #you know what i take the bad karma just make tony suffer :)))) #(but haha how painful would this scene be if kenta was tony's real son)

[uncanny-tranny]

I've noticed this idea that if you're "truly disabled," you must aggressively seek out the diagnosis and the tests to prove it, but...

I got a normal test result recently, and I'm already ready to quit trying to find answers. This is an issue I have had since I was a child, and frankly, I feel grateful to have the very basic test ordered by my doctor. I feel grateful to have been taken seriously enough to have had that basic test ordered.

Add to this the fact that if you're doing test after test after test after test, you might eventually find that your doctor's sympathy and patience run dry. Is it fucked up? Yes. There's this fine line between "is this something that needs to be answered?" and "will my doctor even try to help me?" and not every disabled person can hop from doctor to doctor to find the one who actually fucking cares enough to stick with their patients and believe them.

This entire rant is just a reminder that... disabled people are tired, man. Not all of us can even get our foot in the door of a diagnosis, let alone be officially treated for it. There are so many reasons as to why somebody "quits" trying to find answers. It doesn't mean we aren't suffering or aren't disabled, it just means we aren't trying to find an official answer.

#disability #disability advocacy #and some of my disabilities i refuse to get officially recognized because... WE LIVE IN AN ABLEIST WORLD #and that diagnosis would ABSOLUTELY negatively impact my life just as much or worse than it (the disability) does #it's just frusterating to be treated like your disability must not be 'that bad' if you aren't fighting tooth and nail to 'figure it out' #like i'm still in pain and i am still suffering with or without a diagnosis or test. i have been suffering for YEARS without it actually