#my disabled life is Worthy

[spooniestrong]

#spooniestrong #spoonie #Covid #immunocompromised #my disabled life is worthy

[pyjamacryptid]

me surrounded by all of my medical paperwork that disability services deems “not enough evidence” to claim support, after applying for the 5th time:

#spoonie #actually disabled #all because I don’t ‘tick a box’ #all because of elaborate recited corporate language that essentially spells out ‘not disabled enough’ #Australia may have - objectively - sort of good health care (up for debate obviously but it’s not Bad either) but jfc #the hoops disabled people have to leap through …. #only to be assessed by people who have no fucking idea what we deal with #sigh #I quite literally have to hand over sensitive vulnerable information #my whole life story (since BIRTH) #to faceless strangers #and wait to be judged worthy of support #how do they not expect anyone to be disheartened by this?? #spoon tag #disability #disabled #chronic illness #chronic pain #chronically ill #medical conditions #healthcare #healthcare system #Australian healthcare #personal

[magicallythey]

thank you @chaoticsweetheart for letting me post this!

I know I need to hear this often ESPECIALLY during mental and physical flare ups so I figured I'd share this message here

Being disabled does NOT mean you are UNLOVABLE.

Being disabled does NOT make you UNWANTED.

Being disabled does NOT make you UNDESIRABLE.

Being disabled does NOT make you UNDESERVING.

Being disabled does NOT make you a BURDEN.

[Video Description: A tiktok by user chaoticsweetheart. She speaks to the camera in a darkened room. A text box in the middle of the screen reads, “Red X emoji, Do not give unsolicited medical advise. Red X emoji.” Captions are also provided in white writing at the top of the video. At the end of the video, the woman kisses her pointer and middle fingers, then brings them closer to the camera to simulate sending a kiss to the viewer. End description.]

Video Transcript

[The song “Repeat Until Death” by Novo Amor plays in the background throughout the video.]

I’m in so much physical pain right now, but I felt like I really needed to say this for myself and for other people: your disability DOES NOT make you unlovable.

And the people that hurt you, that get to go on with their lives and be happy and joyful, is NOT EVER a reflection on your worth.

And I know it’s SO hard to keep that in mind, and I know it’s so not fucking fair.

But, your disability does NOT make you unlovable.

It does NOT make you UNWANTED.

It does NOT make you UNDESIRABLE.

And it does NOT make you a BURDEN to anybody.

#disabled #disability #cripple life #cripple punk #physically disabled #mental health #spoonie #chronically ill #chronically disabled #self healing #chronic illness #chronic disability #chaoticsweetheart #thank you! #its nice to hear this from someone else #definitely caught me at a good time when my mental and physical health is tanking #disabled people are worthy of love #disabled people are not a burden

[whatareyoudoingwithamaserati]

Sometimes being disabled means being in the beginning stages of a flare up and raking the lawn anyways because somehow you are the most abled in the house. Despite everyone else being abled

#[REDACTED] household going thru it lately but we stay silly #raking is an excuse to listen to music and fall into a rhythm anyways so it’s not horrible #I just need to stop after every couple of rows to catch my breath #IF YOU ARR DISABLED: DO NOT TRY THIS AT JOME #trained professional in action (I have weighed the numbers and counted the balance and decided that this is a worthy sacrifice) #my life will be hard regardless of time. if I can make the time-based struggles easier on my family then I will ^-^ #cats.txt

[shrimp1y]

the relationship between labels and someone's personal/social identity is kinda getting completely demented due to capitalism and social media

#krill livestream #like. whenever i see people say as a [][][] person im like. who are you talking to #it's like. self marketing. you introduce yourself as a product with certain features that makes you think of yourself #as a better fit to talk about something. or as someone worthy of being watched #the idea of like. a 'neurodivergent' community used to be vaguely about our shared struggles and social needs maybe. but now there's like #autism content. which is honestly hilarious. im making a terrible point because i love autism content. personally think the yippee creature #is amazibng and a delight. but anyways. like. labels has become internet accessories at this point #like cottagecore []core etc-core and the nuttiest thing is. labels goes out of fashion #obviously not when its disability core unfortunately im gonna be disabled for like baby. but like. how trendy it is as a topic #how marketable and consumable it is as topic. as content. changes. and its nuts to look at it at a macro level #also i have gripes with certain groups. maybe autismcore is cringe or maybe it just happens to attract all the cringe autistic people #jsyk im autistic. as an autistic person. from my silly autism experience #if you needed that to validate my personal observations #also what the fucxk is 'im gonna be disabled for like baby' oh it was supposed to be for life

[pawjamas]

this upcoming month i’m going to work on being kinder to myself.

#i’ve been questioning my worth A lot especially due to being disabled and both not living a traditionally ‘normal’ life #as well as needing more accommodations than others just to function at the place abled people do with none. #i deserve this life i’ve made for myself. i’m doing a good job and i am enough! and i deserve all this love and care. #i am worthy of this love and of this life. #💭 #diary 📖

[truths89]

For those of us who embody the intersecting identities that society chooses to marginalize, sorrow and despondency become the riverbed within, where we learn how not to sink into our quiet cries —because there is no search party enlisted for our missing souls.

Zisa Aziza

#Truths89 #poetry #ZisaAziza #NegressOfSaturn #pain #trigger #trauma #worthy #marginalization #white supremacy #ablelism #disability #overcome #burden #humane #my life matters #institutional oppression #agents of harm #self-soothe #Feeling feelings #mental illness #chronic pain

[gregmarriage]

internalised ableism sucks every dick in the world. what do you mean not only will random strangers be ableist to me (not even overtly), but my own brain will do the same thing????

#idk just lamenting #shit’s so fucking stupid bruh #i’m very much wedged between mourning the life i could be living and the fact that i probably wouldn’t be living such a life even if i #wasn’t disabled #it’s laughable really #like who do i think i am?? #congrats dad your lesbian daughter won’t embarrass you since she won’t date anyone anyways #she won’t get a man she won’t get a woman or anything in between #i will always find a way to ruin everything #genuinely curious why i waste time wanting this when it’s never gonna happen and i should just make peace with it #it’s pathetic otherwise #genuinely don’t feel attractive or worthwhile currently #like yeah yeah my worth isn’t just in my attractiveness #but i don’t feel worthy in other areas either #i neglect my friends #i cant function as a normal human being #my own body constantly betrays me #and even if it didn’t i wouldn’t have anything to offer still #it is just made worse in the situation i find myself in now #which isn’t gonna change #so yeah #i’m not much of a friend to the few i have and genuinely don’t get why they like me #i have been and will continue to be a shit romantic partner #i’m a shitty daughter #just all around shit basically #god whatever i’m being so fucking stupid #ya know what my problem is? #i don’t know what it’s like to not be unbearably lonely #and whatever reprieve i get i spoil #idk delete later

[misophoria]

pushing urself towards getting good at looking for people and situations that suit/care about u VS towards getting good at surviving and compromising with people and situations that don't

#i know that in life there's a balance to be struck between these 2 poles #u can't expect to always get everything that's perfect for u #it's not practical or reasonable to make a fuss over every thing and every instance that doesn't take u into account #but from birth i've been steeped in the koolaid of thinking that being a mature person means eradicating every human need/limit i had #believing that the only true kind of person who has the right to take space in the world is able to withstand and compromise anything #the kind that can take any indignity and every hardship and every physical strain and every emotional trauma without ever buckling #without ever needing rest #and i missed out on every chance to build up that other skill. i just sucked it up whenever things weren't suitable #i adapted to unsuitable friends. i sucked it up when institutions didn't accomodate my disability and continued to strain my body #i was masking and holding myself up to neurotypical standards from the start of my life bc it was The Way To Be A Person #i settled for a partner that liked me but couldn't understand the real me at all and i catered my interests to theirs to stay connected #and the thing is that society keeps telling stories where the moral is that 'toughing things out pays off and makes u a strong person' #'and look at the spoiled entitled nasty ugly foil character who couldn't tough things out! we don't like these kinds of people!' #and omgggg it's tiring swimming through this societal narrative soup #it's difficult feeling like refusing to settle makes me ugly or not worthy of compassion #it's difficult feeling like it's something Sinful and Unthinkable

[disabilityreminders]

You know what? My disability does hold me back! I'm sick of pretending it doesn't because society only thinks we're worthy if we're actively trying to "overcome" our disabilities or that we "defy the odds". I'm sick of hearing "you can do anything you put your mind to" because that's just not true and is often invalidating of the struggles disabled people face.

I am worthy either way, regardless of whether I can contribute in a way that society deems acceptable or not.

The same applies to you! You are worthy if you can't drive, can't finish school, can't work a conventional job. You are worthy if you can't live on your own without help. You are worthy if you'll need assistance for the rest of your life. You are worthy, always.

#my post

[spooniestrong]

#spooniestrong #spoonie #disability #immunocompromised #my disabled life is worthy #nypd

[chronicbitchsyndrome]

disabled people who are lifelong, permanent dependents, i love you. you are my friends and my lovers and my siblings and you are me and i am you and i love you.

i'm really despondent sometimes over the ways society sees us. how conservatives see us as burdens and drains on society, yes, and also how liberals mock our lives, how the idea of being an adult dependent is seen solely as the result of poor life choices, how everyone all across the political spectrum sees things like "getting an allowance from your spouse" and "relying on one person for housing" as cause for mockery, jokes to make, nothing but a conceptual stick with which to beat people into performing well in work and school. still others see us as childish, as pitiable, perhaps not as worthy of mockery but definitely not as worthy of being treated as a social equal, never someone you could invite into your social spheres and make an effort to include--they're just not independent, no offense to them, it just makes them so childish, i can't have an adult friendship with them.

but we persist anyway. we're here. i'm lucky to love the people i'm dependent on, i'm lucky that they respect me as a person and would never leverage their power over me, i'm lucky that they're willing to constantly self-check to make sure they're not accidentally using that power. i hope to g-d you're lucky in the same ways, because i love you. and if you're not, i love you. i'm holding your hand and i'm standing with you and i'm going to try to make a better world for both of us.

#dyspunktional #cripplepunk #cripple punk #actually disabled #actuallyautistic #actually autistic

[fernshawart]

How to write a cane user character

(Written by a cane user)

A few months ago, I wrote a small guide on good disabled characters and why they were good that gathered quite the attention, and I thought that doing another more specific guide this time would be interesting for writers or just people that are curious ! This guide will include general informations, some things to do, some things to avoid and some ideas that might revolve cane users's lives.

Things to know about cane users

Cane users are pretty diverse, and putting us in little boxes usually isn't the best idea if you want to make a character that has substance and isn't just "the disabled one". Here some infos about cane users that might be helpful knowledge !

Canes don't have ages. Most cane users in media are portrayed to be old, but truly, anyone can have the need to wield a cane ! I've been using mine ever since I was 17.

Can users can have a large variety of problems for their canes. Some canes are used to avoid pain from effort. Some canes are used for balance purposes. Some canes are to make walking less exhausting (works the same as walking sticks !) And sometimes, it's multiple problems at once.

Not everyone needs their cane 24/7. Some always need it, some can make small efforts without it but overall often need it, and some people, like me, can spend quite a lot of time without it. I almost never use my cane in my house, and mostly take it outside !

People with canes can run. We're not necessarily slow, I'm even faster than a lot of my friends.

Not using a cane can come with consequences, but not always. Some people might be able to walk without a cane but then suffer horrible consequences, but for others, canes are just a commodity for specific occasions.

Canes don't have to be looked down upon. Look at some characters with canes that look cool as hell ! Arsène Lupin, Roguefort Cookie, Brook ... Their canes serve their style !

We can be pretty healthy. Some people can have canes just because they were born with a bent leg and that's it. Our cane doesn't define our health status.

Canes aren't a curse. Think of them as something positive. It's a tool to make our lives better. You don't see someone sitting on a chair and think "awh, it's sad that they need a chair". It's more something like "hey it's cool that this chair is here so they can sit down"

Things to do

Make them use their cane. And when I mean use, I mean that canes are just funky long sticks usually made out of metal. Have fun with it ! Let them use it as a weapon ! Trust me, one hit in the knees with a cane and you're DOWN. Use it to reach stuff that's too high for everyone ! Have fun. Be creative.

Let them decorate their cane. It's an extension of their body ! You usually put on clothes that you like, don't you ? It's the same for a cane. If they like cutesy stuff, let them paint in it pastel colors ! If they like a more flashy style, add some stickers on it ! If they're a fancy person, give them a beautiful crafted cane with jewels on it !

You can make them a little shy or uneasy about their cane. Some people don't feel worthy of confident enough to wield one. It's not rare to see people think they're "not disabled enough to do so"

But on the other hand, you can do the complete opposite !! Make them proud of that cane ! Make them act like they're feeling pretty and more confident with it ! One thing i like to think about with my own cane is that I look like a cool gentleman. That boosted my confidence immensely.

Things to avoid

Don't make it their whole world. And by that, I do not mean that their cane shouldn't be a defining trait of their personality. Think of Toph from ATLA. She is blind, and you usually can't think of her character without describing her as blind. However, that isn't her entire personality trait. Make cane users have a goal in life, friends who enjoy them for who they are and not just pity them, have fun ... Don't just make them the disabled one.

Don't try to make the character's life just a plain disaster unless it's the focus of your story and you really know what you're talking about. Having a character who's always in pain, who feels bad about relying on their cane and/or who's angry at the entire world for being disabled is a REALLY tricky subject to use if you don't want them to be either a mass of unhappiness and angst for no good reason or some inspirational porn of the character who inside is deeply tortured but outside keeps up a facade because they shouldn't cry to avoid making others uneasy.

Do not, and I repeat, do NOT try to heal them, especially in a magical way. Bad idea. A lot of disabled people's goal isn't to be healed. It's to live a normal life. Making it so the ultimate goal for them is to be healed makes it as if they were worthless as long as they were disabled. Making their situation better physically or mentally is one thing. Curing them completely is really bad. "But some disabled folks want to be cured !" True, true. But if you are able bodied, I'm not sure if you can have the right mind to understand all of the complex details about this situation that leads to someone's life choices and the end result may look like you think the only thing that can make disabled people happy is being freed from their condition. I think it's best to just avoid it altogether. If you need a more nuanced idea, try to give them a solution that still has a few downs ! For exemple, a prosthetic that feels like a real arm, acts like a real arm and basically replaces it perfectly is a full cure. But a prosthetic that takes time to adjust to, needs repairs sometimes and doesn't look 100% like an arm can be a better narrative choice

Smaller thing, but don't make the handle uneasy to wield if you draw the character design. You can decorate most of the cane, but if you have chunky spiky decorations on the place you're supposed to clench your hand over, you're gonna hurt yourself. I've seen quite a lot of jewel handles or sculpted metal handles and usually their not good. If it's detailed metal, your hand will end up cramped in little parts and it can hurt. If it's a jewel, it's so easy for it to slip out of your hand it's unpractical.

List of tropes/ideas of scenes/details about canes to help you write new situations !

If you walk with a cane during winter, you can't put your hand in your jacket to get warm and there's a high chance your hand will get freezing. So after a long walk, you get an excuse for another character to hold their hand and warm them up.

If the handle is metallic, you get the opposite problem during summer. You can burn yourself so easy ! Easy accident if you want someone to help and get closer to the disabled person without it necessarily involving their disability.

Canes are SUPER useful when you're walking upon heights. They make things really easy, just like hiking poles on mountains ! I live on volcanoes and whenever we clim on a harsh slope, I'm always the first to get up there. Good moment for your character to get a boost of confidence if they get all the way up somewhere before their friends !

The first time using your cane feels magical. If you have chronic pains, it makes you feel like your pain disapear. If you can't walk right, it feels like everything is suddenly alright. The moment where a character chooses to wield a cane can be huge for character development. It's a moment of fear because of the impact a cane has on their appearance, but also a moment of confidence and relief.

Canes fall. All the time. And after a while, it becomes fucking comical. Trust me, putting a cane against the wall, seeing it fall and doing it three times again in a row while it doesn't want to stay up makes you embarrassed but also makes you want to laugh because of how stupid it looks.

When you get a cane, you stop being invisible. When you walk outside, generally speaking, people don't look at you. They don't care about you. But when you get a cane, people start to stare at you for no other reasons that you have a cane. Half of them are just curious, especially if you're young. The other half has a very specific look. The "oh, you poor thing" look. Which is, trust me, particularly awful to get, especially when you're just existing and doing nothing special. How does your character react to this ? How do they feel about it ?

I believe that is all I had in mind. I may add some more details in the future if I get other ideas, but this should already be a good start. I would be thrilled to answer questions if you have some, either in my askbox or through DMs.

I will tag this post with characters holding canes that aren't necessarily considered cane users but that some people may be interested in writing as such. Feel free to tell me if you'd like to see tags being added !

Edit : I'm highly encouraging everyone to look at the tag section under this post where a lot of other can users are sharing their experiences !!

#disability #writing #writing prompt #writing guide #fanfiction #fanfic #ao3 #roguefort cookie #gingerbrave #Brook one piece #writing tips #writing advice #archive of our own #long post #spoonie #handicap #cane #cane user #kaz brekker #capn cuttlefish #cap'n cuttlefish

[narrativelysignificantturtleduck]

something that makes sokka extremely adhd relatable is that he's constantly looking for his Thing, the one Thing he's good at or useful for that makes up for any failings or flaws or ways he just can't measure up to others. at the beginning of the show he defines himself by being the oldest boy in the village & best warrior, but then he gets his ass kicked by zuko and suki and sees aang's raw power and he can't exactly think fighting is his special skill anymore. but he still thinks he has to be defined by fighting ('man of the house' daddy issues) so he calls himself the guy with the boomerang bc that's turned out to be his most useful and versatile and unique weapon, the one that other people can't outclass him at (after all, it's his most successful attack in his fight with zuko). when he loses it in "avatar day" he explicitly says it's like losing a key part of his identity and the moment katara goes "hey you're good at solving mysteries" he's like "yeah! i'm a detective! that's my new thing! and gets a new set of objects to signify it ("i believe in the power of stuff"). but detective sokka doesn't last bc throughout the entire episode he and katara are pretty equally matched in detective skills and he gets his boomerang back anyway. failed experiment.

and throughout all of this, he's figured out that people find his insistance on getting them fed & his grumpy comments funny and so he begins defining himself as the meat and sarcasm guy, and when he's a tough spot in "bitter work", bargaining with the universe to get him help, he offers that up as all he's got to give. it's obviously a Joke that he immediately asks for meat after telling the universe he'll give it up but it's also pretty indicative of how much he clings to these identities. it's all he's got (he thinks), of COURSE he can't actually give it up. they stuck that boy in a hole for 22 minutes and it revealed so much about how he sees himself.

at some point (likely around "the library" when he takes initiative to come up with a fire nation invasion plan) he also becomes the plan guy, the idea guy, and the gaang find themselves looking to him for leadership. this is perhaps the closest to fully encompassing sokka that any of his "[blank] guy" labels get, since coming up with plans involves planning when and how to fight (boomerang guy) & how to get everyone fed (meat), and people not following his plans is a major source of frustration (sarcasm).

this all culminates in "sokka's master", where the show finally names the underlying insecurity driving this quest - that he's a nonbender. katara being the last waterbender meant she was in danger and that keeping her safe was top priority, and even though hakoda and kya wouldn't have played favorites sokka probably felt a little like the unfavorite child for not being special like her. he lacks an ability, and believes his life has less value bc of it. almost like somebody with a disability and internalized ableism

(interesting, one of the people who most consistently mocks sokka for being a nonbender is toph, early on. toph has a lot of internalized ableism herself, a fear of vulnerability bc she doesn't want to perceived as weak like her parents thought she was. her bending is her disability aid, the thing that allows her to be stronger than people think, so she dismisses a nonbender until she learns better.)

piandao's response to sokka's lack of self-worth is not to train him to be great at one thing, but to introduce him to a variety of different arts, show him that his value lies not in having any one skill but in his capacity to learn and grow. there's no single thing that makes him worthy. it isn't even the combination of all of them that makes him worthy. he simply is worthy.

and i don't know if this is a unique narrative in fiction or anything but it really means a lot to me that sokka doesn't have One Thing that "makes up" for him not being a bender. he's of course extremely skilled and prodigious at many things he does in the show but there's no one savant talent that "justifies" him being in the group and i feel like so many disability narratives - especially for kids - go that route and i really appreciate that atla doesn't and simply says people are valuable because they are valuable, not because of their special abilities

#nina's personal log #sokka #seeing 'avatar day' again reminded me i had this in the drafts #ALSO i think toph is a different disability narrative than sokka but also more nuanced than typical this is NOT saying hers is bad #it's very good #nd atla tag

[akindplace]

Living with a chronic illness has made me develop a mix of a wistful way of looking at life itself at the same time I have a whimsy feeling about surviving despite of my condition which is something that still makes me look at the world with wonder.

Yes, I do struggle with a lot problems that a lot of people my age don’t, and yes, I have suffered way too much from my illness. But I still have hope. And I still keep going, even when things are hard, despite how difficult it can be to accept the fact that I will have to be dealing with this for the rest of my life. I am well aware of all the challenges of living with a chronic illness when the world is not always welcoming to people who have disabilities. But I’m going to keep going. Despite the pain, despite cruelty, despite the differences that sometimes made me feel isolated.

I’m still fighting. I’m still here. I’m still alive in the face of everything, and it’s very exhausting to keep trying, but I am here. And life itself can be so beautiful even when I’m in pain. Those two things can and do coexist. And surviving so much it’s a statement that my body might be different, but I can be strong in other ways.

So if you’re dealing with a chronic illness, I’m telling you I am so glad you’re in this world and that being different does not make you any less worthy of being here, of taking space, and that you deserve happiness. And that happiness is not something you have to earn by enduring pain and pushing yourself past your breaking point, but because you’re just as human as everyone else, and as equally valuable.

#cw chronic illness #cw chronic pain #self-acceptance #self-worth #on being human #original writing #had to edit my this a few times because I’m tired #very very tired but very very alive #sorry for the all the editing but yeah I’m very sleepy while writing this #it’s been hard lately

[fantasy-frog]

To anybody who might see this, July in the states is disability pride month. As someone who’s past decade plus has been a journey towards understanding, accepting, and advocating for my psychological and physical disabilities and my whole life, aiding disabled family members, I want make it known that: the way many of us feel you can help us the most, is not by “pretending” we’re abled, like we’re just like everyone else, because we’re *not*

When disabilities are ignored, or treated as just “uniquely abled”, it falls on the disabled to maintain abled people’s comfort; to make our disabilities small, to not advocate for equity and the bettering of our lives in a supposedly equal society.

Equality is not equity.

Differences must be acknowledged, understood, and worked around *by abled people* for any true progress to be made.

Most people think this is government related. I know abled people as individuals can’t change that there’s little to no wheel chair access in their bustling city, that the sidewalks are cracked and filled with lips. An abled person can’t make public schools treat autistic kids with humanity, or children with memory-relates disabilities able to always have notes for their exams. They can’t make the employers stop firing us, or the government give us our right to marriage when living under SSI.

What I’m asking for is Empathy. True empathy. The kind that informs your beliefs, and actions. Talk to disabled people. Get to know them. I promise you, you have a disabled person in your family or social circle. Really be inquisitive about their experiences, struggles, and frustrations.

Acknowledge your privilege. Your ease of access to the world. Really sit in it. Absorb it. Your empathy will only grow. And when enough abled people do even just this, the world for us becomes less hostile. It becomes more livable. We become no longer burdens, but cherished by our communities, our families and friends. And trust me, even though the world is not built for me, and I have to consistently jump through 10,000 hoops to achieve even the smallest of victories for an abled person, and my body hurts and breaks down, so I get in a chair on wheels, or get out my cane, or put on my noise cancelling headphones, and just come across obstacle after obstacle -

The majority of the pain comes from the stares. The glances. The questioning. The points when you see the patience leave the eyes of the one who you thought loved you unconditionally, and you remember your place in our collective culture. And fuck man. You recall how workable all the bureaucracy and hurdles felt, how manageable it was to push forward (it’s what you always do) … before you were reminded of where you sit on the totem poll, and how conditional worth is in our society.

Disabled people are worthy. We are valuable. But we need you to believe it, or nothing will ever change.

#disability #please reblog #disability pride month #important #disabled #disabilties #disability rights #advocacy #autism #ADHD #wheel chair friendly #wheel chair users #invisible disability #cane user #mental illness #chronic illness #disability awareness #disability awareness month